Courting the Enemy

By Jess Rig

Beginning, Section II

Chapter 1

Posted on Wednesday, 5 January 2000

It was an overcast spring day at the Hunsford parsonage and the emotions of two of its occupants were just as cloudy. Miss Elizabeth Bennet had just stated to Mr. Darcy that he was the last person on earth she could ever marry. This was going against the grain for Darcy. All his life he was accustomed to getting things he wanted and to now be rejected by such a woman.

Miss Bennet, who had no connections that he, could acknowledge. Yet Darcy still loved her. It suddenly didn't matter who her family was when he saw her face. Mr Darcy was about to end the torture of hearing Miss Bennet's hurtful words about him when she sprouted one final outburst.

"Oh I wish I could be you to show you what a proud, arrogant and presumptuous imbecile you are. I wish you could be me to see what extremely rude creature you're seen as!"

Mr. Darcy, with a face already as hard as stone, showed no emotion as he walked to the door and stopped under the doorframe.

"I apologise for taking up so much of your time this evening and I now understand your feelings perfectly clearly. My greatest wishes for you and your family's health and happiness."

Within a second he was out the door, his boots stomping on the stairs as he left. Lizzy slumped down in the nearest chair exhausted by her overworked emotions. Clenching her fists together she let out a frustrated cry.

"Of all the despicable suggestions. That I could marry any man with such a lack of morals as to destroy the lives of those around him. Hateful beast!"

Meanwhile, only a hundred metres away, Mr. Darcy was making his way back to Rosings. He'd grabbed a fallen stick and was now using it to whack the trees as he passed. How could she be so misinformed? Darcy wondered as he took a swing at one tree disrupting several birds resting on its branches. Oh how I loathe Wickham, the scoundrel.

Darcy eventually made it back to Rosings leaving a trail of fallen nests in his wake. He promptly climbed the stairs to write to Miss Bennet to tell her the whole truth. He fell asleep in the wee hours of the morning with his head on the desk, the saliva falling from his open mouth making a puddle on it.

The next day Elizabeth slowly made her way into the dining room at the Hunsford parsonage. She was greeted by a coughing fit, which had suddenly struck Mr. Collins. In his efforts to breathe he was sending great globs of egg, potato and bacon flying across the table.

"Now Mr. Collins," scolded Charlotte "Do I always have to remind you to take smaller bites? The food won't run away, you know that."

Mr. Collins only reply was to shove another great pile of food into his mouth.

"Charlotte," said Lizzy, her eyes focused on Mr. Collins in disgust, "I am going to go for a walk in the woods. I think the fresh air will do wonders for my headache."

Charlotte nodded in reply and Lizzy hurried out the door as quickly as she could, running occasionally to greater the distance.

In the middle of a nearby grove stood Mr. Darcy. He had sometimes happened upon Miss Bennet there, and hoped she would come this way again so he could give her the letter. His eyes were drooping more and more as every second went by and his body was beginning to sway slightly. Suddenly the crack of a stick behind him caused Darcy to spin around so suddenly he became dizzy and stumbled. Shaking his head, Darcy opened his eyes and saw Miss Bennet standing before him wearing a bemused expression. Darcy stepped forward and with as much dignity as he could muster held the letter out to Miss Bennet.

"Would you do me the honour of reading this letter?"

Feeling the conversation had had been lengthy enough, Mr. Darcy bowed and walked back towards Rosings.

Elizabeth was suddenly alone, holding letter, with no idea at what had just taken place in front of her. She sat down on a close fallen log and began to read the letter Mr. Darcy had written. Such mixed reactions she had to its content. She felt Mr. Darcy had been completely wrong regarding Jane and Mr. Bingley but what of Wickham? Lizzy knew Mr. Darcy well enough to believe he would not use his sister in such a way unless it was absolutely necessary.

Lizzy's head became so muddled that her headache came back with such renewed severity that she felt compelled to lie down. Her eyes soon felt heavy as she drifted off into a quiet slumber. Not far off Mr. Darcy was slumped under a tree succumbing to his fatigue.

A few hours passed by and both Mr. Darcy and Lizzy slept silently (apart from occasional snorts from Darcy.) It was almost noon when Darcy awoke feeling most peculiar. He looked down at his clothes and found he was wearing a ladies dress. He looked at his hands and saw small elegant hands with pale skin. Oh my goodness, I'm hallucinating! He thought panicking. In the distance Darcy saw another person lying in the grass. He ran towards him. As he grew nearer he started to recognise the person. He stepped closer and peered over the man.

At that same time Elizabeth opened her eyes. As they adjusted to the light she saw a figure standing over her. It was herself.

"What on Earth?!" she cried and then promptly fainted.

Chapter 2

Posted on Thursday, 6 January 2000

Mr. Darcy's mind was running wild. Whoever this man whom looked like Darcy was, he was still unconscious on the ground. And Darcy still was dressed like a lady.

He kneeled down on the floor and grabbed the man's head shaking it back and forth and pinching his cheeks a few times. This method did not work but within a few moments his eyes began to flutter open.

Lizzy looked about herself. She was wearing men's clothing, her body was twice its usual size and as she touched her face she felt the prickly sideburns that ran down the length of it.

Lizzy looked at the lady then jumped up. They started circling each other in amazement. She reached out touched the women's face.

"Mr. Darcy, is that you?" Lizzy asked incredulously as she pushed the ladies nose.

"Yes, I am Fitzwilliam Darcy. Are you Miss Bennet?" The lady replied. Lizzy burst out in hysterical laughter.

"Am I Miss Bennet? I don't know any more. How could I be Miss Bennet if I look like a big hairy man! Oh please let this be a dream!" Lizzy pleaded, burying her face in her hands, "I want to wake up now!" Mr. Darcy reached over and grabbed a handful of Lizzy's hair and pulled it tightly. Lizzy screamed out in pain.

"Do you still think that you are dreaming?" asked Darcy.

"No," muttered Lizzy, "But I can't understand how we got into this predicament. How did I get to be you?"

"I remember now. You did this to me!" cried Darcy "Oh you and your horrible big mouth! Couldn't help yourself could you? You had to make one final dig and look where it got us. And now I have such pains in my chest." Mr. Darcy began to pat his chest repeatedly.

"What on earth do you think your doing?" shouted Lizzy "Move your hand this instant. I may not be in possession of it at this moment in time but it's still my body! Your honour as a gentleman dictates that you may not look or touch any unnecessary part of my body from now on." Darcy crossed his arms sheepishly. "And what do you mean I did this to you?"

Darcy moved closer and stared Lizzy in the face. "Don't you remember? Yesterday just before I left. You wished you could be me and that I could be you." Lizzy groaned and slumped down on the ground.

"So I did. Well, what do we do now? Aren't you leaving tomorrow with Colonel Fitzwilliam?"

"I will just have to postpone it a week, that is all. Although this could just be a one day occurrence and tomorrow everything would be back to normal." Elizabeth's eyes brightened at this possibility then clouded over a second later.

"Oh no! I was supposed to be back at Hunsford hours ago!" She stood up and started running towards Hunsford, her features that were light and bouncy on her frame were positively clownish on Darcy.

"You do realize that you can't go back looking like that!" called Darcy. Lizzy turned around and eyed Darcy. "If you go back there claiming to be Miss Bennet they will cart you off to Bedlam."

Lizzy returned to where Darcy stood and slumped back down on the ground deflated.

"Yes, I can see it now," continued Darcy, "'Poor Miss Eliza,' they will say. 'A most unfortunate situation. Still it was no surprise considering she had such a mother!'"

Lizzy rose and stood only inches from Darcy's face. "You should be ashamed of yourself," she spat. "You make remarks that I should be embarrassed to have my family. Well at least they are loving. You have probably never loved anything in your whole life! You would not even know how to love." Darcy's face crumpled in remorse

"I love you," he replied staring intently into Lizzy's eyes.

"No you don't," replied Lizzy. "You insulted me the first time you met me and have been rude to me ever since then. I am only tolerable to you and every one else!" So emotionally overwrought Lizzy flung herself against a tree and cried her eyes out. Darcy not knowing what to tried to console her.

Imagine the picture confronting Charlotte as she rounded the bend in her search for Lizzy! It the outrageously confusing sight of a man who appeared to be Darcy bawling into a tree with Lizzy patting his back.

"Lizzy! Thank goodness you're alright!" cried Charlotte as she ran down the path towards them.

Lizzy turned around and smiled at Charlotte. "Hello Charlotte," she said as she wiped the tears from her face.

"Hello Mr. Darcy," replied Charlotte with a shocked look on her face. Not only did the sight of Darcy crying surprise her but also that he was speaking to her in such a familiar manner. He had rarely acknowledged her existence in previous encounters.

Charlotte stepped forward and hugged Darcy, whom she thought was Lizzy. "Where have you been? She asked. "When you did not return after three hours Maria began picturing monsters,"

Darcy stood as stiff as a board when Charlotte hugged him. It was strange experience to be hugged by someone who wasn't Georgiana. Darcy looked at Lizzy in desperation hoping she would explain they're presence.

"Well," began Lizzy. "You're not far from the truth. We did see a kind of monster."

"Yes," agreed Darcy, " We saw a fox!"

"That's right," replied Lizzy. "And the fox, it seemed so familiar. You see, when I was young I had a pet rabbit called Bertie. I loved him very dearly, even though I am incapable of love." Mr. Darcy stirred at these words and scowled at Lizzy.

"Anyway," continued Lizzy, "One day I was playing in the garden with Bertie, and my mother called me away. I was only gone for a second but when I returned I saw a fox lurking near Bertie ready to pounce. I managed to chase him off in time but that image haunts me today and I am still very emotional about it." Lizzy added in a few sniffles. Mr. Darcy stared at Lizzy in disbelief then rolled his eyes.

"Right," said Charlotte very slowly. "Well I came to tell you we have been invited to Rosings this afternoon. We need to be ready in an hour so come with me, Lizzy. Good bye Mr. Darcy." Charlotte reached out and grabbed Darcy's hand and pulled him with her.

"BUT, But," spluttered Darcy in protest. He tried to free himself but was in vain. He left with one helpless look aimed at Lizzy.

Chapter 3(i)

Posted on Friday, 7 January 2000

Mr. Darcy was ill with fright. He knew that it was expected of him to change before tea, but how on earth was he going to put a dress on?

"Now come on, Lizzy," Charlotte said as soon as the were out of the real Lizzy's earshot, "What really happened just then. Even if this ridiculous Bertie story is true, which I highly doubt, it doesn't explain why you were gone so long or why you have forest of twigs in your hair." Mr Darcy grimaced. It is times such as this I wish I had a more active imagination, he thought racking his brain for an answer. The perils of a having a dull mind!

"Well, after I left Hunsford this morning I ran into Mr. Darcy," Darcy began. "He and I talked for a long time. I've really come to understand him now. I think he was just judged too quickly by everyone in Meryton, especially me. Why, he is so charming and natural!" Darcy said, a sinister smile playing on his face.

"Is that so?" asked Charlotte, stopping to face Darcy so he could explain himself.

"Oh yes, quite so," replied Darcy, averting his eyes. They continued to ramble up the path towards Hunsford.

As soon as they entered the house Charlotte began to push Darcy up the stairs. "Now get changed as quickly as possible," she said as she opened a door and shoved Darcy through it.

"Is that completely necessary?" asked Darcy, scared witless thinking about what was about to happen, a slight shiver pulsing through his body.

"Of course its necessary!" cried Charlotte. "Look at that dress. It's absolutely filthy! Now hurry! In five minutes I'll send a maid up to see if we can salvage your hair, we don't have time to redo it."

Charlotte turned to leave but returned and stood at the door. "You never did tell me how you became so dirty," she smirked. "Never mind it'll have to wait as we are running late. Mr. Collins!" she cried and raced down the stairs.

Darcy quietly shut the door. "Oh help," he muttered. He walked to the door he assumed was a cupboard. Inside was an array of dresses, all neatly folded on the shelves. Lady Catherine has been spreading her advice, he mused.

Mr. Darcy had no idea what dress he should wear so he picked the dress he had seen Lizzy wear most. It was a cream lacy dress. He laid it out on the bed and stared at it. Lizzy had said he could not look at her body but how could he get dressed without seeing something? Mr. Darcy's eyes gazed about the room. They rested on a checked scarf folded neatly on a chair. Aha! He thought.

A few minutes later a maid, called Harriet, arrived outside Lizzy's room. She tapped gently and patiently waited for Miss Bennet to open the door. Suddenly a loud bang followed by several unladylike curses pierced through the air. Harriet flung open the door to ask what the matter was. As soon as she was in the room she froze, her mouth hanging open.

Harriet had never seen anything like it before. Miss Bennet, a sensible, respectable young lady was in the middle of her room. She had a scarf tied around her eyes and was wearing her dress back to front with one arm in a sleeve twisted behind and the other clutching her foot. She was jumping up and down on one foot and her face was scrunched up in pain.

"Excuse me ma'am," said in Harriet in a timid voice. "Are you alright?"

Mr. Darcy stopped jumping and lifted his head trying to work out where this new voice was coming from.

"Yes I'm alright," he sighed. The next time I see Miss Bennet I won't be in charge of my actions, he thought bitterly.

"If you don't mind me asking, ma'am, why are you wearing a scarf around your eyes?" Mr. Darcy ummed and aahed over a possible answer to his behavior.

"I, uh, I," he spluttered, " I-It was suggested to me to me by a friend to blindfold myself so that I would become more sympathetic to those without advantage of sight."

"Would you like to take the blindfold off now, Ma'am?" asked Harriet, astonished that such a Miss Bennet, against all appearances, was slightly eccentric.

"No!" cried Darcy, scaring Harriet slightly. "Would you help me get dressed first?" he added in a more subdued tone. As Darcy felt his arm being pulled out of the sleeve he wondered how Lizzy was getting on with Lady Catherine.

Chapter 3(ii)

Posted on Saturday, 8 January 2000

Lizzy watched in desperation as Darcy was being pulled away by an eager Charlotte. "What am my I supposed to do now?" she cried, stomping her feet in frustration. Lizzy scanned her surroundings trying to figure out how she could get to Rosings. She decided to just walk down the nearby path and see what she fell upon.

It only took a few minutes before Lizzy reached Rosings. She entered through the nearest door she could find.

She was just as surprised at what was in the room she had just inadvertently stumbled into as its inhabitants were. The room she had entered was in fact the laundry, and the maids had been washing Lady Catherine and Anne's clothes. Hanging on the washing line was numerous pairs of bloomers and petticoats. Lizzy wasn't very embarrassed, as she had naturally seen it all before, but the same couldn't be said for the poor maids who were now beet root red and doing their best to cover the clothes.

Lizzy soon realized the impropriety of the situation when the eldest maid, obviously in charge, spoke out.

"Do you need some help sir?" she asked in the calmest manner possible.

"Yes, could you please tell me how to get to the drawing room from here?" she asked feigning embarrassment. She decided to go to the drawing room as it was just about the only room in the house she knew.

The maid in charge quickly informed her were to go then set about calming some of the younger maids who had almost fainted in fright and were trembling on the floor. Lizzy thanked the maid and exited the room doing the best to remember the instructions she was given.

A few cupboard doors later she entered the library. Inside Colonel Fitzwilliam was sitting by the window reading a book. Not quite the place I'm supposed to be, she thought sheepishly as she coughed to announce her presence.

"Ah Darcy!" Fitzwilliam cried out as he looked up from his book. "You have created quite stir this morning. Lady Catherine has been ranting that you have been kidnapped by Gypsies one minute and that you have eloped with Miss Bennet the next!"

Lizzy scowled at this suggestion. I wish I could give Lady Catherine a piece of my mind, she thought. (Don't worry this won't come true. How gross would that be! JR)

"Speaking of Miss Bennet, did you manage to find her and give her the letter?" asked Fitzwilliam.

"Yes I gave her the letter," Lizzy replied. "To be brutally honest though, I don't love Miss Bennet as I thought I did, we're just friends now." Lizzy did not want Colonel Fitzwilliam to assume there was a relationship between her and Darcy. After all, this crazy situation could be all over tomorrow!

Fitzwilliam's eyes brightened at this information.

"Darcy, there is something I have not shared with you. I have been most enamored by Miss Bennet since the first moment I met her," Lizzy's face was fit to burst as she beamed with happiness. "Now that I know you do not love Miss Bennet I shall prepare to make my advances," Fitzwilliam finished.

Lizzy's face went from sheer happiness to sheer aggression in seconds. The nerve he has! Her brain screamed. He is going to prepare to make his advances? Do I look like a country that is being invaded?

Lizzy was just about to tell Fitzwilliam which orifice he could prepare to advance through when a wonderfully evil thought sprung into her mind.

"Fitzwilliam that is a wonderful idea. In fact I suggest you start this afternoon when she comes to dine with us," Lizzy said, her voice becoming as innocent as a child's.

As if on queue the carriage containing Mr. Darcy, Charlotte, Maria and Mr. Collins drove past the library window.

"Come," said Fitzwilliam. "You shall have to face the music. Look on the bright side though; she can't kill you if there are witness's." With a wink he walked to the door. Lizzy followed him, more curious to see Darcy than scared to see Lady Catherine.

When Fitzwilliam and Lizzy entered the drawing room the other guests had just sat down. Lizzy's eyes went straight to Darcy and she quickly noticed he was wearing a different dress. She raised her eyes and tried to cover her grin when she made eye contact with Darcy. He shook his head and rolled his eyes indicating for her not to ask.

"Mr. Darcy, at last you are back!" Lady Catherine barked breaking the interlude. "Where have you been? No one knew where you had got to after you left this morning."

Before Lizzy could answer Mr. Collins spoke up.

"Did Mr. Darcy go missing as well?" he asked, "Cousin Elizabeth was gone for hours this morning as well, and when she did come back her hair and clothes were in a state of disarray!"

Lady Catherine's eyes narrowed and glared at Lizzy and Darcy. She always knew Miss Bennet would be trouble for her.

Lizzy knew what Lady Catherine was thinking at that moment and was about to physically throttle Mr. Collins for being so stupid. Thinking the better of it she decided to put her plan into action.

"Miss Bennet, it would be an extreme pleasure if you would perform for us," Lizzy said, gesturing towards the piano and then nudging Fitzwilliam who sat beside her. He agreed, and said that he would turn the pages.

Darcy turned almost purple and stared at Lizzy truly horrified!

Chapter 4

Posted on Monday, 10 January 2000

Darcy was almost delirious from shock. He had broken into a sweat and was ready to melt through the floor as quickly as he could. Lizzy had just volunteered for him to play the piano for everyone and Fitzwilliam was going to turn the pages for him. Darcy knew there was no turning back now.

"I suppose Miss Bennet can play for us if she wants to," Lady Catherine sighed, condescendingly. "But only since we have no superior player.

Darcy rose and walked into the adjacent music room, Fitzwilliam hard on his heels. Darcy made sure to pass close enough to Lizzy so she could here him hiss, "I want you to no I have never hated you more."

Lizzy smiled secretly and turned to watch what would unfold.

Darcy sat down at the piano as Colonel Fitzwilliam placed a song in front of him. He stared at the sheet for some time trying to make sense of it. It was like a completely different language to Darcy.

"I am afraid I do not know this piece, Colonel. I hope you don't mind," he said apologetically.

"That's alright Miss Bennet," Fitzwilliam replied, "You can play anything you want to. And please call me Richard."

Darcy's eyes shot wide open and he turned to face the other direction. "Richard!" He mouthed. Darcy didn't even want to think about what Fitzwilliam was trying to do. It just made him feel queasy.

Darcy searched the depth of his mind for a song he knew. He suddenly remembered a day 16 years ago. His mother was giving birth to Georgiana and so he and George Wickham had been left alone in the music room. George decided to teach Darcy to play a song and they spent the rest of the afternoon banging on the piano.

Darcy slowly and self-consciously clenched his fist together and rapped his knuckles along the black keys (F sharp, G sharp and A sharp) before bonging his fist twice on C sharp. He continued playing in this fashion.

Lizzy was near hysterics! She tried desperately to cover her mouth to avoid laughing out loud, thus causing her face to turn a brilliant scarlet hue. Charlotte caught Lizzy's eye and looked at her disgustedly.

When Darcy finished playing the room was deadly silent. Even Lady Catherine didn't seem to have a response.

Fitzwilliam suddenly started laughing.

"A fine joke Miss Bennet, one I am sure I will never forget!" he cried. Darcy breathed a sigh of relief. But it was not long before Lady Catherine started to regain her voice.

"I did not find that particularly amusing, Miss Bennet," she said. "If you insist on trying to be funny at least get some proper lessons. If she had been well enough I'm sure Anne would have been a true comedian." Darcy just rolled his eyes and turned to face Fitzwilliam.

"Do not worry about Lady Catherine," Fitzwilliam said gently. "I think you show true talent." Fitwilliam reached over and held Darcy's hand. "I fact that is something I have always admired about you. You are never afraid to give something a go." He paused as he collected his courage, "Miss Bennet, you simply must know how much I have come to like you in these past few weeks. In fact, I feel I am beginning to fall in love with you."

Darcy was just sat there, his face turning whiter as each second went by. He suddenly felt nauseated and went from white to green.

"Miss Bennet are you alright?" asked Fitzwilliam concern echoing on his voice. Darcy quickly stood up and raced for the nearest door, which meant that no one in the other room saw him leave.

Lizzy and Charlotte, both immensely bored by Lady Catherine's conversation, were staring out the window. Both were equally surprised to see Darcy run past and dive under a hedge, scaring the wits out of the gardener. Charlotte excused herself and hurried out the room to check on Darcy while Lizzy walked over to an extremely confused Colonel.

"What happened?" she asked, her eyes bright with curiosity.

"She ran out," Fitzwilliam said in desperation. "I told her I was falling in love with her and she ran away from me!" Lizzy patted Fitzwilliam on the back. She was beginning to feel slightly guilty at what she was doing to him.

"Perhaps she was just really happy?" she suggested.

"But she was turning green. She looked ill. You don't look ill when you're happy." Fitzwilliam said dejectedly.

"Well perhaps Miss Bennet does not get flushed when she is happy. Perhaps she becomes green instead!" Lizzy sighed, exasperated.

"Maybe," said Fitzwilliam.

Meanwhile Darcy was slowly crawling out of the hedge. Charlotte was standing with her hands on her hips waiting for an explanation.

"I must have eaten something at breakfast that has affected my stomach," he said apologetically.

Charlotte narrowed her eyes.

"You didn't eat any breakfast, Lizzy!" she cried. "What really happened?"

Darcy sighed and began biting his nails.

"Colonel Fitzwilliam just told me he was falling in love with me," he said. The whole prospect still made him feel queasy.

"Why would that make you sick?" Charlotte asked. "I thought you liked the Colonel."

"I do?" exclaimed Darcy.

"That's the impression I always got. But if you want to we can go back inside and you can let him down gently. I'd consider it though. Colonel Fitzwilliam is a nice man."

Darcy was not going to marry his male cousin, and was about to tell Charlotte so but wisely decided against it. Instead he walked back into the house to break Fitzwilliam's heart.

Lizzy saw Darcy and Charlotte walking back into the house and after giving Fitzwilliam one last encouraging smile sat back in her seat.

Chapter 5

Posted on Wednesday, 12 January 2000

Dinner at Rosings was very quiet that evening. Fitzwilliam was too busy nursing his broken heart to attempt to be happy and since no one else in the room had an exceptionally cheery disposition, Lady Catherine was the only one talking.

Darcy was staring at Miss Bennet through out the meal. While he had been busy trying to console a bawling Colonel it occurred to Darcy that Fitzwilliam wouldn't have dared to preposition Miss Bennet unless he had spoken to him first. Since Lizzy was now in his body she must have encouraged Fitzwilliam.

Lizzy had a very tranquil look on her face. She felt sure that Mr. Darcy had now been cut down to size by a few notches. She didn't notice the curious glances he was throwing her way or the fact that he was now talking very intimately with Lady Catherine.

"Lady Catherine," Darcy whispered, "Normally it is not my place to say such things but since you have shown me such hospitality during my stay I feel I owe you the honour. As you know, I have spent a lot of time talking to Mr. Darcy during his stay..."

"If you are trying to tell me that you and he are engaged, Miss Bennet, you are extremely mistaken." Lady Catherine interrupted, in an angry tone.

"On the contrary, Lady Catherine," replied Darcy, "I meant to say that Mr. Darcy, only today, told me that he thought he was falling in love with Anne. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if she received a proposal very soon."

Lady Catherine's eyes widen considerably. A small smile creeped over her face and she began making goo-goo eyes at Lizzy. Darcy sat back in his chair, very content. No one messes with Fitzwilliam Darcy and gets away with it! He gleamed.

Later that evening everyone gathered in the drawing room for tea and coffee. Mr. Darcy made sure he was seated next to Lizzy. She and Anne seemed to be included in the conversation a great deal more than usual, which, naturally, meant no other topic was mentioned for the rest of the night.

When Lady Catherine finally managed to take a breath Darcy discretely whispered into Lizzy's ear.

"Meet me tomorrow morning as soon as you can, at the same place we were this morning. We have a lot to discuss." Lizzy nodded and turned back to face Lady Catherine.

"Mr. Darcy," called Lady Catherine, "How do you like Anne's hair this evening? She chose the design herself."

"It looks lovely," Lizzy replied, suspiciously. There was something about the way Lady Catherine was staring at her that made her slightly nervous. It almost seemed like Lady Catherine was trying to woo her. But that's disgusting, Lizzy thought, I'm supposed to be her nephew!

"And what about Anne's dress? We picked that out on our last trip to London," said Lady Catherine.

"I think-," began Mr. Collins in desperation, seeking the much-needed approval from Lady Catherine that had almost become an addiction to him.

"Ssh! Let Darcy speak!" Lady Catherine cried. Tears began to form in Mr. Collins' eyes and he reached for Charlotte's hand in support. Charlotte held Mr. Collins' hand rather reluctantly; it had the texture of a wet fish and smelled like a dead cat.

"I think that Anne is wearing an absolutely stunning dress," said Lizzy. "It matches the circles the circles around her eyes completely."

The whole room gasped in shock and Darcy nudged her violently. Lizzy realized her mistake and covered her eyes. Anne ran out of the room in tears and Mrs. Jenkinson hurried after her.

"That's right, just cover your eyes and it will all go away," Darcy whispered sarcastically in Lizzy's ear. In reflex she moved her hand and whacked him in the ribs.

"I'm very sorry Lady Catherine," Lizzy sighed, "I was not thinking about what I was saying. You must know I did not mean it!"

Fitzwilliam, who had remained very quiet ever since his rejection earlier that evening, suddenly burst in maniacal laughter. No one had noticed that he had consumed the greater part of the bottle of brandy beside him, in only two hours.

"You did not mean it!" he cried and lurched towards Lizzy. "Just like 'You did not mean it' when you said you loved HER," and at this he pointed to Darcy wistfully, "More than life itself!"

"Peter!" screamed Lady Catherine. In ran Peter with a group of manservants and they quickly grabbed a now near comatose Fitzwilliam and carried him up to his bedroom.

"I think it would be best if we left now," said Charlotte, and pulling a very shocked Maria with her, marched towards the front door.

Chapter 6

Posted on Saturday, 15 January 2000

Mr. Collins, Lizzy, Darcy and Lady Catherine were left standing in the room. Lizzy and Darcy were standing next to each other, huddling together for protection. They each knew that Lady Catherine was probably going to kill both of them and keep their heads one of the shelves in her closet.

"Mr. Darcy," began Lady Catherine, highly incensed. "I do hope the Colonel was not telling the truth when he said you were in love with Miss Bennet. Have you no family honour?"

Lizzy flared her nostrils in aggression.

"How dare you say that about me - er - Miss Bennet!" she cried. "Why should it matter whether Fitzwilliam was telling the truth?"

"It matters because you are engaged to Anne! Why even Miss Bennet said we should expect a proposal soon." Darcy stared at the floor an extremely guilty look pinching at his face. He did not dare look at Lizzy for fear that she would hit him over his head.

"She misunderstood what I said," Lizzy replied, glaring at Darcy. "Lady Catherine, if I haven't even proposed how on earth could an engagement be in place?"

Lady Catherine sat back down in her chair.

"Mr. Darcy you know that you're mother wished it to be so. Will you not honour her now that she has passed on?" Said Lady Catherine in her best manipulative voice. Lizzy turned and looked questioningly at Darcy. He shook his head slightly.

"My mother conveyed no such wish to me," Lizzy said, bitterly. "I believe that it was a fancy that she soon realised would unsuitable. But Lady Catherine, you have fixated yourself upon it in such a way that you now think of me as your possession. I can make my own choices in life!"

Lady Catherine sat in silence for several minutes. She had not been spoken to in such a severe manner since she was a child. She had succeeded in intimidating all those around her so that everything would go her own way. And now thanks to Miss Bennet, this beast, this temptress, she had failed.

"Do you love Miss Bennet?" Lady Catherine asked, coldly.

Lizzy contemplated the answer that would annoy Lady Catherine the most and smiled.

"Yes," she said simply. The room suddenly seemed very quiet then Lady Catherine rose out of her chair and walked towards the door. Before she left, she turned back to face Lizzy.

"After you leave tomorrow I never want to see you again. As far as I'm concerned you are no longer my nephew and I will never acknowledge your name in my presence."

Lizzy's eyes gleamed in satisfaction.

"Fine," she replied, "Tomorrow couldn't come sooner for me."

Lady Catherine stamped her foot and stormed away.

Mr. Collins and Darcy had been watching in wonder. Both were shocked at what had occurred though Mr. Collins was slightly more upset for Lady Catherine's sake.

"I hope you are proud of yourself Cousin Elizabeth," Mr. Collins yelled. "How dare you make Mr. Darcy fall in love with you! I am holding you responsible for what just happened. You shall leave tomorrow as your presence here will no doubt upset my wonderful patroness."

Lizzy and Darcy just rolled their eyes. Darcy was actually quite pleased to have gotten rid of Lady Catherine once and for all. And it didn't hurt that he wasn't the person confronting her.

Charlotte was standing by the door with a frown on her face.

"Come Mr. Collins, Lizzy," she said. "The carriage is waiting out the front." As Charlotte turned she could have sworn she heard Mr. Darcy whisper to Lizzy,

"Mr Darcy, could you tell me how to get to your room." But she quickly shrugged it off as being ridiculous.

Lizzy finally made her way to Darcy's room. She entered and stared about the place. It was a predominantly masculine room and was three times the size of her bedroom at home. She saw a door, which lead off the left side of the bedroom. She found it was the dressing room and sitting on the chair, very neatly folded, was a nightgown and robe.

Lizzy blushed at what she would now have to do. Trying her best to keep her eyes looking straightforward at all times she managed to get the nightgown on. Lizzy looked about a bit more and her eyes rested on the chamber pot in the corner.

She realised that she really needed to answer the call of nature. Knowing a bit about male anatomy as she was staying with her Aunt Gardiner when their eldest son was being toilet-trained, Lizzy realised what she would have to do.

She placed the chamber pot in front of her, grabbed "it" and went. Oh My Gosh, Oh My Gosh, Oh My Gosh! Her mind screamed. Lizzy felt repulsed in herself. She realised it was natural, but there was nothing natural about the situation she was in. She was Mr. Darcy!!!

All Lizzy could do was hope that he was having a tougher time about it than she was.

Chapter 7

Posted on Monday, 17 January 2000

It was the middle of the night after an extremely eventful day in Hunsford. Darcy had finally fallen asleep after having another run in with the scarf while changing. His ankle was swollen from falling over the dressing table.

Darcy was having a particularly fitful sleep. He was dreaming that Caroline was chasing him around Netherfield screaming at the top her voice, "How well you write, Mr. Darcy! How do you get the spaces so neat?!"

Darcy dreamed he was turning down a passage and rolled over in his sleep. With a great thud he hit the floor, his arms and legs sprawling out in all directions. It was in that position he stayed until the next morning.

Harriet, the maid from the previous day went into Miss Bennet's room to wake her up. She was startled to see Darcy lying on the floor in the deepest of sleeps.

"Miss, Miss," she said, shaking Darcy as forcefully as she dared, "It's time to wake up now!" Darcy woke up with a start. His arms flayed about hitting poor Harriet in the eye. He sat up quickly and stared at his hands. They were still small and white.

"Ugh, I'm still the same!" he groaned and laid back down on the floor. Harriet looked at Darcy very confused.

"Who else would you be Miss?" she asked, bemused by his behaviour. Darcy suddenly realised where he was lying and sat back upright.

"Why was I sleeping on the floor?" he inquired. When Harriet looked just as confused a he did, Darcy decided to ignore his situation. "Never mind," he said, standing up. "Could you please leave so I can change."

"Yes Miss," Harriet said. She made her way out of the room and just before leaving she said "Beg your pardon, Miss, but I believe it would be easier if you got dressed without the scarf over your eyes."

Darcy poked his tongue out at the now closed door.

A few unladylike utterings later, Darcy was dressed and sitting at his dressing table while Harriet did his hair. He was patient for at least a few minutes while Harriet fiddled about with his hair. But he knew he had to meet Lizzy to discuss what they would do, so when, half an hour later, his hair was still not done Darcy took matters into his own hands.

He rose from his chair and waved Harriet's hands away from his hair.

"You have been to slow!" He yelled. "No thanks to you I am now late for an appointment!" Darcy looked in the mirror. His hair was up but was only kept there by very loose pins. Darcy decided this was well enough and, without telling where he was going, ran down the stairs and out the door.

He made three steps away from the house before his hair fell out and the pins scattered to the floor. Darcy stared up at his bedroom window and saw Harriet laughing at him.

"Blasted wretch!" Darcy shouted and stormed away in to the woods.

Lizzy who was wearing an embarrassed and guilty look on her face greeted him. Darcy was confused for a minute then, guessing what she would have had to do last night, burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" Lizzy asked. Darcy stopped laughing and just smiled mysteriously. Lizzy noticed this. "I guess your brilliant idea about changing back didn't work."

"I know," Darcy replied, "We have to go back to each other's homes now." Darcy suddenly had a horrifying image of Mrs. Bennet. "Oh Miss Bennet!" he cried. "You cannot let me go back to your mother! I will go insane!"

"Do you mind!" shouted Lizzy. "You don't have a particularly pleasant house either. How will I cope with Caroline Bingley!" Both Darcy and Lizzy slumped their shoulders in dismay. Darcy suddenly smiled and turned to Lizzy shyly.

"You could always tell her off like you did Lady Catherine," he whispered quietly. Lizzy grinned as she remembered the horrified look on Lady Catherine's face.

"Why did you tell Lady Catherine I would propose to Anne?" Lizzy asked turning to face Darcy.

"Because you made me play the piano AND you told Fitzwilliam to try and court me!" Darcy cried indignantly. Lizzy's face went very guilty.

"You know about that?" she asked avoiding his eyes. When she saw him nod his head she nervously broke into a smile. "You have to admit it was very funny!" Darcy purposefully ignored her.

"We should discuss what we are going to do when we get home," he said. "I don't know my way around your house except for the drawing room, and I am certain you will not know your way around mine."

So for the next hour Darcy and Lizzy sat on the fallen long and discussed the ins and outs of their houses. They could each recite every position in the house, from the batty kitchen maid at Longbourn to the senile dog walker at Pemberley.

"Do you realise that we should be back packing right now?" asked Lizzy. Darcy scoffed at this.

"Pack?" He cried. "Why, that is what the servants are for." Lizzy laughed

"Maybe that is what the servants are for at Rosings," she replied, "But I think you will find the servants at Hunsford are not so efficient. So go quickly, else you will be in even more trouble with Mr. Collins!"

Mr. Darcy quickly stood up and started running back to Hunsford before turning around walking up to Elizabeth. He gallantly lifted her hand and kissed the back of it.

Unfortunately the hairs on the back of Lizzy's hand going up Darcy's nose destroyed this romantic moment and caused Darcy to sneeze violently.

Darcy ran away in embarrassment. Lizzy burst out laughing and called after him "I hope to see you soon, Mr. Darcy!"

Lizzy smiled to herself. She was beginning to like Mr. Darcy!

Chapter 8

Posted on Wednesday, 19 January 2000

Mr. Darcy came running up the path to Hunsford, his hair flying madly in the wind. He rushed in the door and climbed the stairs to his room. Charlotte noticed this and silently followed.

Darcy raced about his room, frantically searching for the suitcase. After checking the cupboard he dove under the bed. "Aha!" he cried. By this time Charlotte had reached the open door and was staring into the room.

There was Darcy, on his knees with his head under the bed and bottom sticking in the air facing the door. Charlotte raised her eyebrows in amusement.

"Lizzy, if you insist on being in that position you should at least shut the door!" called Charlotte, entering the room and shutting the door behind her. Darcy looked up with a start, banging his head on the bed frame above him.

Darcy backed out from under the bed and stood up. He angrily pulled the suitcase up onto the bed and opened it. "I have to pack," he grumbled.

"I know," replied Charlotte, slightly annoyed herself. "You left without telling anyone where you were going. Harriet mentioned that she couldn't do your hair as you were late for an appointment?"

Darcy's face clouded with the sound of that name. "Don't talk to me about Harriet, I am not in the mood."

Charlotte at Darcy intently. "Were you with Mr. Darcy again?" she asked suspiciously.

"Perhaps," replied Darcy, nonchalantly. He hoped Charlotte wouldn't inquire about him and Lizzy any longer. It would disturb him greatly to have to say he was in love with himself.

"Lizzy, you shouldn't let Darcy slip through your fingers," Charlotte said, "I heard him tell Lady Catherine that he loved you. And he is rich and very handsome. What more could you want?"

"Nothing, I am sure," replied Darcy, "Could you please leave so I can pack." Darcy pushed Charlotte out the door and shut it behind her. He leaned against the door and grinned. "I always knew she liked me."

In the mean time Lizzy was sitting in the tearoom at Rosings having a cup of tea while the servants dashed around packing for her trip to London. I could get used to this! She mused and snuggled down into the chair.

Her tranquility was disturbed suddenly by the grand entrance of Lady Catherine de Bourgh. Lizzy rose from her chair and stood in front of Lady Catherine, her new height giving her a superior edge.

"I want you to know, Darcy" Lady Catherine started, "That this is the last time you shall ever see me. You will never be welcome at Rosings again. Georgiana is welcome, of course. She should not be made to suffer just because she has a stupid disrespectful brother."

Lizzy laughed at Lady Catherine's haughtiness. "If that is the case then I pity poor Georgiana. I wouldn't want to stay here at all! In fact if the Colonel is ready we shall leave directly." Lizzy quickly marched towards the front door, Lady Catherine at her heel.

"I find it hard to believe you are your mother's son!" cried Lady Catherine. "She would be ashamed to see you now!"

Lizzy stepped into the carriage where Fitzwilliam was already waiting. Lizzy shut the door and put her head out the window. "I believe you are wrong Lady Catherine," Lizzy said. "If my mother could see me now I think she would be proud!"

The carriage driver cracked his whip and Lady Catherine stepped away from the carriage. "Goodbye Fitzwilliam," she called. "Remember you shall always be welcome at Rosings." This was said with a pointed look at Darcy.

The carriage moved forward and neither Lizzy nor Fitzwilliam looked back as the drove away from Rosings.

"It's nice to be leaving isn't it?" remarked Lizzy. The Colonel ignored Lizzy and stared out the window in disgust. "Fine," Lizzy mouthed and stared out her window. It was going to be a long ride to London!

Darcy was out the front of the Parsonage saying goodbye to Charlotte and Mr. Collins. Charlotte was instructing the servants where to put the luggage leaving Darcy alone with Mr. Collins.

"Well Cousin Elizabeth, I hope you have enjoyed your stay with us," Mr. Collins dribbled. "Up until yesterday you have had a wonderful time. Perhaps now you have seen my dear Charlotte and me in such matrimonial happiness in a fine place as Hunsford you are regretting your past decisions."

Darcy frowned. Had Mr. Collins proposed to Miss Bennet? This image repulsed Darcy to the very core. He glared at Mr. Collins. "I have no reason to be envious of Charlotte, Mr. Collins. She does not like you and only married you because she didn't want to be a burden on her family. The truth is, Mr. Collins, Charlotte spends the whole day trying desperately to avoid you at all costs."

Mr. Collins stared at Darcy, shocked and speechless. Charlotte walked over to their group and hugged Lizzy. Luckily she hadn't heard any of their conversation.

"Lizzy, I shall miss you dearly!" she cried. "You must write often and tell me all the latest gossip!" Darcy nodded and stepped into the carriage. Mr. Collins was still standing in the same position, shell-shocked as Charlotte said goodbye to Maria.

Maria climbed into the carriage. Mr. Collins finally regained his voice enough to say "Goodbye Mariah, Cousin Elizabeth."

They were soon on their way. Darcy stared out the window watching the scenery. Something did not seem right to him. "This is not the way to Hertfordshire," remarked Darcy. Maria laughed at this.

"Of course it is not. We are going to London to stay with your Aunt and Uncle in Gracechurch Street." Darcy fumed. She tells me all about the philandering attic cleaner at Longbourn but forgets to mention the slight detail that we're actually going to London!

Maria started babbling about how they had dined at Rosings umpteen million times and so Darcy shut his eyes and tried to sleep. It was a very long ride to London.

When they finally arrived in Gracechurch Street Darcy practically bolted from the carriage in order to greater the distance between him and Maria.

Jane flung the front door open. "Lizzy! Maria! How wonderful it is to see you!" She hugged them both tightly.

Darcy looked at Jane. How different she looked from when he had seen her last. She looked pale and very melancholy.

Suddenly a herd of children came running out the front door, followed by a middle-aged woman. The children swarmed around Darcy throwing their arms around his limbs tightly.

Jane was greatly surprised when Darcy tried to remove the children. Normally Lizzy loved having her cousins cuddle her! Mrs. Gardiner's laugh rang out.

"Let go of poor Lizzy children! She is probably very tired from her long journey. You shall have a chance to play with her later!" Mrs. Gardiner pulled each child away and pushed it back into the house. She then gave Darcy a kiss on the cheek.

"You look very well Lizzy!" she said with a smile. She then turned to Maria. "It is wonderful to see you Maria! Come inside both of you. We have prepared baths for you after such a long journey."

Maria smiled. "A bath sounds heavenly." She sighed. Darcy's eyes shot open wide. He hadn't had a bath since the "incident" yesterday.

"I do not think I need a bath, Aunt! I am not very tired!" Darcy protested.

"Nonsense!" scoffed Mrs. Gardiner. "Come on, we'll get you into the bath." Sheer terror was etched onto Darcy's face as the women began pushing him up the stairs.

What was he going to do?!

Chapter 9

Posted on Friday, 21 January 2000

An extremely frantic Darcy was being barged along the hall by Jane and Mrs. Gardiner while Maria followed behind. Darcy remembered Lizzy's words yesterday. They loomed heavy in his mind as he was pushed into a room. Maria was escorted into an adjoining one.

"Come on Lizzy," Mrs. Gardiner said, "A bath isn't going to kill you!"

Want to make a bet? Darcy thought bitterly. Lizzy was right. If he had that bath and looked at anything he would no longer be a gentleman. Of course no one else would know about it but that was beside the point!

"I can't" whined Darcy. "I am not allowed to!" Mrs. Gardiner quickly lost her patience.

"Don't be stupid Lizzy!" Cried Mrs. Gardiner. "Who said you could not take bath?" Darcy looked away nervously.

"I don't know! But something bad will happen if I do." Mrs. Gardiner sighed in frustration. She couldn't believe what she was hearing!

"I will just have to do this myself then," Mrs. Gardiner said and began removing Darcy's dress. "Honestly, you are behaving worse than Andrew and he is only 3!" When she had finished removing Darcy's clothes she walked him over to the bath and pushed him into it.

With a great splash Darcy tumbled into the bath. He quickly scrunched his eyes closed as tightly as possible and tried not to move in case he accidentally touched something.

"I'll leave you to it. TRY and wash though Lizzy; you are beginning to smell!" Mrs. Gardiner marched out of the room with a very dissatisfied look on her face.

Darcy's eyes were still squeezed shut. I must not look! I must not look! His brain chanted. Unfortunately curiosity got the better of him. He popped open one eye, then the other and stared down. His eyes bulged right out of his head.

A few hours later a MUCH more educated Darcy walked into out of his room after dressing for dinner. He met Jane who was on her way down stairs just outside his room.

"I trust you had a relaxing bath Lizzy?" Jane asked innocently as the walked together. Darcy blushed furiously and nervously giggled.

"Yes," he replied, "It was very relaxing." Darcy stared at Jane. What is that makes her so melancholy? "Jane, if you don't mind me asking, are you feeling alright?"

"What?" Jane asked distractedly. Darcy repeated the question. "I am fine Lizzy, don't worry. It just hurts me that Mr. Bingley does not care for me. I really believed that he did."

"Oh," was all Darcy could reply. He felt ill as he realised that Jane really did love Bingley and now she was hurt by his actions. What have I done?

Silently they walked into the dining room. Everyone else was already seated at the table. Darcy sat between Maria and Jane.

After everyone had began eating Mr. Gardiner spoke up. "I must say, Lizzy, how surprised we all were to find out you were coming here early." When Darcy didn't respond Maria spoke up.

"Mr. Collins made us leave early because he didn't want Lizzy to upset Lady Catherine after Mr. Darcy said he loved her. Did I mention we dined at Rosings eleven times?"

Jane suddenly started violently coughing on her carrot. Darcy went bright red and slid down in his seat, feeling all eyes of the room on him. He leaned over and whispered in Maria's ear. "Thanks a lot."

Mrs. Gardiner, noticing Darcy's obvious discomfort quickly changed the subject. "You say you dined at Rosings eleven times?" She said to Maria. "You have been most fortunate! Mr. Gardiner, did I mention Jane and I saw Mr. and Mrs. Napier yesterday while shopping?"

"Really?" Replied Mr. Gardiner, in false surprise. Jane was still eyeing Darcy. She couldn't believe what she had heard. Worst luck, she said to herself. Lizzy is loved by someone she hates and I am hated by someone I love.

The rest of the evening went smoothly and Darcy went to bed early claiming fatigue from travelling. He had just crawled into bed when Jane knocked on the door then entered.

Darcy was shocked when Jane shut the door and sat on his bed. "What do you think you're doing?" he cried and pulled the covers up. Jane looked at Darcy in surprise.

"I want to talk," she replied. " Is what Maria said at dinner true? Does Mr. Darcy love you?" Darcy bit his lip. He had to tell Jane the truth.

"Yes," he said solemnly.

"Did he propose to you?" Darcy thought about what had happened two days ago with painful clarity. He nodded his head in response. "And you didn't say yes?" Darcy shook his head. "Why not?"

Darcy remembered Lizzy's reasons for letting him down. Wickham, and Jane and Bingley. Darcy definitely did not feel comfortable telling Jane about Wickham yet. But looking into Jane's sad eyes he realised he had to tell her the truth about Bingley.

"Jane, I said no to Mr. Darcy because he has kept it from Mr. Bingley that you were in London all these months. In actual fact Mr. Bingley does love you." Jane stared at Darcy in disbelief for a few moments, her stomach doing flip-flops, then flung her arms about him in happiness, rocking him back and forth.

"He loves me! He loves me!" she shouted, not caring who heard her. "Oh Lizzy, it is like a wonderful dream. An absolutely marvellous dream! I never want to wake from it. He loves me! I must go tell Aunt. And you need sleep. Oh thank you for telling me this wondrous news!" Hugging Darcy one last time Jane literally skipped from the room in happiness.

Darcy snuggled down in his bed and smiled broadly. He knew he had at last done the right thing.

Chapter 10

Posted on Wednesday, 26 January 2000

It had been a frenzy-filled ride to London in the Darcy carriage! Fitzwilliam muttered some occasional grunts in reply to Lizzy's questions and stuck his head out the window for the rest of the trip. By the time Fitzwilliam and Lizzy got to London the tension between them could have been got with a knife.

Lizzy and Fitzwilliam made their way into the house. Georgiana had noticed their arrival and ran to greet them at the door.

"Fitzwilliam! Colonel! Its wonderful to see you!" she cried as she hugged them both. "It has been dreadfully lonely without your company!" Lizzy stared at Georgiana blankly as she was pulled down the hall.

"We are glad to be here too, Georgiana," replied Fitzwilliam. Ah Georgiana! That's who she is!

"We have made a tea for you in the sitting room. We thought you would be hungry after such a long trip." They followed Georgiana into a finely decorated room, rich with exquisite paintings of the country and marble tables. On top of the middle table was their meal, all set out on fine bone china.

Lizzy's mouth salivated over the meal in front of her. At home she would have received a few biscuits and tea after a journey. What lay in front of her could only be described as a masterpiece.

They all sat down and cups of tea were poured. "Did you have a nice tea at Rosings?" Georgiana asked, innocently. Fitzwilliam responded with a great snort. Lizzy and Georgiana stared at him, Georgiana with surprise and Lizzy with displeasure.

"It was fine Georgiana," Lizzy replied. "By the way I can't ever see Lady Catherine again." Georgiana gasped in surprise.

"Why on earth not?" she cried.

"Yes, Darcy, why on earth not?" Fitzwilliam inquired with a smirk. Lizzy glared at Fitzwilliam disdainfully. When she refused to answer Fitzwilliam laughed. "He cannot see Lady Catherine again because he insulted Anne and professed his love for Miss Elizabeth Bennet!"

Georgiana looked startled by this revelation and Lizzy wished profusely that she had bit her tongue at the time. She decided the easiest thing to do was to fob it off.

"Twas a silly thing to do, I admit it. Still, do not be worried Georgiana, I am to remind you that you will always be welcome at Rosings, which I have done. So, if you both will excuse me I shall go to bed."

"But you can't," Georgiana called out, "You have business to attend to with your steward." Lizzy groaned inwardly. She knew that she couldn't manage this on her own.

"Couldn't that be held off until tomorrow? I shall be able to deal with it better then." Before anyone could respond she made a mad dash to the door.

"Aren't you going to give me a good night kiss?" she heard Georgiana ask through big innocent eyes. Lizzy turned back round and walked to Georgiana. She bent down kissed her cheek and bade her good night.

She just made it out the door when she heard Georgiana whisper to Fitzwilliam "What happened between Fitzwilliam and Miss Bennet?" Lizzy rolled her eyes and made her way up to her room which, luckily, she remembered Darcy's instruction to.

The next morning she was woken by a gentle shaking administrated by a manservant. "Sir," whispered the manservant, "You must dress quickly. The tailor is here to make your new pants. Do you not remember?"

Lizzy sat upright with a start. Tailor? She shuddered. The manservant pulled her out of bed and placed her in the hands of her valet. Lizzy gained enough of her senses to put her clothes on herself, however she did need just a miniscule amount of assistance with the cravat.

When everything was sorted out the tailor was allowed entrance into the room. He bid Lizzy good morning then began measurements for her pants. Lizzy stood still while he ran the tape measure up the side of one leg then the other. The tailor then ran the tape measure up the middle of Lizzy's leg. She jolted with a start.

"What do you think your doing?!" Lizzy cried. She ran quickly to the other side of the room. The tailor and the valet looked at Lizzy strangely.

"I am measuring you for your pant, Sir," the tailor replied. That's how they measure pants? She pondered, That is disgusting! Never the less she walked back to the tailor and let him finish the job.

When it was over Lizzy met Georgiana and Mrs. Annesley for breakfast. Lizzy noted that Fitzwilliam was not in the dining room.

"He left this morning," Georgina replied, "He said there was a pressing military matter he had to deal with. He did say that he bears you no ill will and hopes you can forgive for being so impolite."

Lizzy just nodded her head and mused over a piece of toast. Georgiana does not seem to be the proud monster Wickham described her as. In fact she is quite sweet and polite.

As they were leaving the dinner table Mrs. Annesley took the liberty of whispering in Lizzy's ear. "Georgiana is so much happier now that you are back. I am afraid she has a lot of time to think about last summer and what that devil, Wickham, did. She is a completely different girl to what she was a week ago."

Lizzy sat down on the chair in the study. What Darcy said about Wickham must be true; there is no denying it. The scoundrel! I must make sure people are warned about his character before this can happen again!

It was time to get in touch with Darcy.

Chapter 11

Posted on Thursday, 27 January 2000

Darcy was curled up in a chair in the drawing room reading a book. The Gardiner children fluttered about him interrupting occasionally to show him a drawing they had done of him. Darcy was beginning to warm to them, particularly the boys as they reminded him very much of himself about that age.

Suddenly, like a whirlwind, Maria ran into the room. She dragged Darcy up from his chair, grabbed his hands and starting jumping up and down. "We are going to see a play!" she squealed. Darcy stared at Maria in fascination.

Mrs. Gardiner appeared at the door and laughed. "Settle down Maria, you will do yourself damage." Darcy turned to Mrs. Gardiner.

"Are we going to see a play?" he asked. Mrs. Gardiner nodded her head in confirmation.

"Yes, I have bought tickets for you, Jane, Maria, Mr. Gardiner and myself to see Much Ado About Nothing tonight. You don't come to London enough so we thought it would be treat."

Darcy smiled at Mrs. Gardiner. It was a wonderful gesture by the Gardiners and Darcy knew that they were genuine warm people. He began to feel guilty about criticizing all of Lizzy's family.

Meanwhile on the other side of town Lizzy was sitting in the office with her steward, Jones, trying to understand what he was saying. "How much money do you want to give to the orphanage this year?" Jones asked. Lizzy poked her head out from her book and stared in confusion.

"Do we support an orphanage?" she asked. Jones looked startled by this question.

"Of course we do. Your father started it a 20 years ago." Mr Darcy is more giving than I thought, Lizzy noted.

"We shall give them three thousand pounds. Is that all right?" Jones' eyes popped out of his head.

"Three thousand pounds!" He spluttered. "You have never bestowed that much kindness in the past." Lizzy's good thoughts of Darcy clouded.

"I can afford it can't I? Why shouldn't a wealthy man like me bestow money open those who do not have any?"

"There is no reason why you shouldn't, Sir," Jones bumbled. At that moment the housekeeper entered informing that Mr. Bingley and his sisters had arrived.

Lizzy made her way to the sitting room. Georgiana and Mrs. Annesley had already greeted Bingley, Caroline and Louisa. "Mr. Bingley it is good to see you," Lizzy said shaking his hand. Bingley chuckled.

"When did I become MR. Bingley, Darcy? You have never called me that before in your life!" Caroline tittered as well.

"Fancy calling Charles Mr. Bingley, that's ridiculous. In fact I feel you should be calling each other by your Christian names. You are practically brothers after all," she cooed making eyes at Lizzy. Lizzy glared back at her.

"No I could never call you anything but Darcy," Bingley said good-naturedly, "Fitzwilliam is far to stuffy for me!"

Everyone in the room laughed politely, except Caroline who was now offended, for Lizzy's sake. "So Bingley," Darcy emphasized, "For what reason do we have the pleasure of your visit?"

"We are going to the theatre tonight and we thought you would like to join us," Bingley replied. Lizzy could see Georgiana nodding her head enthusiastically in the corner of her eye.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea. What shall we be seeing?" Lizzy asked.

"Much Ado About Nothing," Bingley said, "It is Caroline's favorite." Lizzy looked surprised.

"Is that so, Miss Bingley? I may say you have an excellent taste," Lizzy noted the side glance between Caroline and Louisa.

"Thank you Mr. Darcy," Caroline said as demurely as possible, "By the way I have always said that you remind me very much of Claudio," Bingley snorted loudly.

"Really?" Lizzy gasped, "How ghastly! I rather fancied myself as Benedick." Bingley snorted again. Caroline glared at him. "Yes, we shall go tonight it sounds like a capital idea!" Lizzy answered. "Now, would you like to join Georgiana and I for tea?"

The afternoon went quickly and the evening arrived just as Lizzy and Georgiana were entering their carriage to attend the play. "I'm very excited, Fitzwilliam. I have never seen Much Ado About Nothing. What is it about?"

"That I cannot tell you," Lizzy replied, "You will just to wait and see!"

At the same time Darcy, Jane and Maria made their way done the stairs from their rooms all dressed up for the theatre. Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner were waiting for them down the bottom.

"My dears," cried Mr. Gardiner, "You all look as pretty as a picture! Shall we make our way out?"

In a few minutes they arrived at the theatre. Jane clutched Lizzy's hand nervously as they made their way inside. The front of the theatre was full of people. Darcy and Jane wrestled their way to a safe spot and stood chatting to each other.

Lizzy was at the other of the room standing by herself, as Georgiana was with Caroline and Louisa. She was scanning the room looking for interesting people when she saw Darcy talking intimately with Jane. She laughed out loud scaring a few people around her. This was definitely a sight Lizzy had not expected to see.

She decided to make her presence known to Darcy and made her way to him. "Hello," she said, stepping out in front of Jane and Darcy. Both startled in surprise.

"Hello Mr. Darcy," Darcy replied, "How are you?" He asked with emphasized meaning.

"I'm fine," Lizzy reassured. Jane noted the reserve between Darcy and Lizzy and felt sorry for them. Even if Darcy had kept her from Bingley it was in her nature to feel sorry for him. "I am here with Georgiana, Mr. and Miss Bingley and the Hursts," Lizzy said.

Jane paled considerably. It was at that moment that Caroline and Bingley walked over to join Lizzy not knowing whom she was talking to. Bingley and Jane made eye contact and stared at each other in disbelief. Lizzy and Darcy tactfully decided to leave them alone and Lizzy pulled Caroline with her.

"Lizzy," called Mrs. Gardiner, standing a few metres away with an elderly couple. "Please come here; there is someone I want you to meet." Darcy walked away leaving Lizzy with Caroline.

"I say Miss Bingley, what a particularly remarkable colour of orange your dress is!" Lizzy remarked. Caroline's eyes lit up.

"Do you like it?" She asked, excitedly.

"Not particularly," Lizzy replied and went to join Darcy and her aunt.

The play was about to begin so each group went their different ways. Lizzy found herself in a private box with an excellent view of the stage. She picked up her binoculars and tried to find Darcy. He was seated in the sixth row from the front in between Jane and Maria.

As the curtains went up Darcy watched the stage; Lizzy watched Darcy and Caroline watched Lizzy with bitter resentment.

Chapter 12

Posted on Saturday, 29 January 2000

The curtains went up for the interlude and everyone spilled out into the foyer. Lizzy somehow managed to disappear from the Bingleys and was now standing by herself. Darcy noticed this and was about to go talk to her when someone beat him to it.

Miss Elmira Wallace was a young lady of three and twenty. She had a fortune of 20,000 pounds and was considered to be an eligible match, even though she had a nose that astonishingly resembled a banana. She had had her eye on Darcy for some time now so when she saw Lizzy all by herself decided to take the plunge.

"Good Evening Mr. Darcy. I trust you have been enjoying the play?" She said, with a grand flutter of her eyelashes. Lizzy looked confused.

"Have we met?" she asked hoping this lady wasn't a relative. Miss Wallace laughed.

"Of course we have met. We were introduced when you were just 19. Though I must say you have matured a lot since then." Miss Wallace pressed herself against Lizzy. Lizzy looked frantically about the room and caught Darcy's eye. Her eyes desperately begged for help, so Darcy decided to put her out of her misery.

Darcy walked up to Lizzy and Miss Wallace. "Hello dear, who are you talking to?" he asked instructing Lizzy to play along. Lizzy gave a sigh of relief as the lady moved away.

"This is Miss er, Miss-," she said blankly.

"I am Miss Wallace. And who might you be?" she asked disdainfully to Darcy. Darcy racked his brain for a way to remove Miss Wallace. There was only one thought that came to his head.

"I am Mr. Darcy fiancée!" she replied with triumph.

Caroline who had been casually over hearing the conversation screamed out. Everyone in the foyer went quiet and stared at Caroline. "You are engaged," She cried, "To that country girl! She has no breeding, she is ill-mannered, has no taste and what's worse she comes from Hertfordshire!"

A whisper went through the crowd. Bingley quickly took charge of the situation and clamped his hand over Caroline's mouth dragging her out the door with the Hursts trailing behind them.

The third act was announced and everyone went back into the theatre, much preferring to watch the performance outside. All that was left was Lizzy, Darcy, Georgiana, the Gardiners, Jane and Maria.

Lizzy and Darcy stood facing them unsure what to say. Georgiana and Jane looked hurt; Maria extremely curious and the Gardiners were shocked. "Lizzy, I think we should go," Mrs. Gardiner said quietly. She grabbed Darcy's hand and led him to the door. Darcy looked back apologetically as he disappeared through the door.

Georgiana walked up to Lizzy and hugged her tightly. She let go and faced her. "Why didn't you tell me you were engaged?" Lizzy wanted to cry out that she wasn't engaged and tell Georgiana the whole truth but she realised that would be impossible. No one would ever believe her.

"I hadn't received permission from her father yet and so we weren't going to tell anyone. But that Wallace woman put the pressure on us. I didn't mean to hurt you Georgiana," Lizzy said. Georgiana smiled.

"It's alright," she replied, "I understand. It was funny watching Miss Bingley anyway. But I am sorry she said those things about Miss Bennet,"

"As am I," Lizzy whispered as she led Georgiana out the door. They went straight back to the apartment and to bed. Lizzy desperately needed to reflect at what had happened.

The next morning was bright and sunny. Lizzy made her way down to breakfast and the morning newspapers were handed to her. On the front page of the society papers were the words - 'FITZWILLIAM DARCY OF PEMBERLEY ENGAGED TO UNKNOWN BRUNETTE FROM HERTFORDSHIRE.'

Lizzy started choking on her bacon from surprise. She washed it down with tea and read on. It described how they had been at the theatre, how Caroline had chucked a wobbly and was pulled away and that they were not seen again for the rest of the night.

Lizzy groaned and sat her face in her hands. What could be done? Georgiana entered the room and noticed Lizzy's condition. She then saw the paper lying in front of Lizzy and wisely decided not to say anything. Breakfast that morning was very quiet.

Bingley arrived at 10 o'clock and Lizzy received him in the study. "Bingley," she said shaking his hand, "I trust you are well. How's Caroline?"

"Hasn't left her room I'm afraid," Bingley replied with a grin. "So what's this I hear about you and Miss Elizabeth?" Lizzy grimaced.

"Eh..." she shrugged. Bingley took this as Darcy's usual reserve. Lizzy noticed she was all alone with Bingley and seized her chance. "Bingley, there is something I wanted to talk to you about since I came back from Kent. Please sit down."

Bingley and Lizzy sat down and Lizzy faced Bingley in earnest. "Bingley, you know I was staying at Rosings with my Aunt Lady Catherine?" Bingley nodded, "Well when I was there, Miss Elizabeth Bennet was staying with the Collins' as Charlotte Lucas had married Mr. Collins."

"Lord! Poor thing!" Interrupted Bingley.

"Anyway, Mr. Collins lives at the Hunsford Parsonage which is at the edge of the Rosings grounds. Miss Bennet and I met on several occasions and on one of them she mentioned that I had been wrong in estimating Jane's feelings for you. In fact her feelings are quite the opposite."

Bingley's eyes lit up like a fire. "You mean she has loved me all this time?" Lizzy nodded happily. "I must see her! I shall go to her at once! Good day, Darcy!" Bingley ran out the door only to return a second later. "By the way, do you know where she is staying?" he asked sheepishly.

Lizzy rolled her eyes. "I shall go with you," she replied.

Darcy was experiencing the Spanish Inquisition from Jane. "Why did you tell me you rejected him, when you didn't?!" she cried.

"We knew his family would not approve so we decided to make them comfortable about the idea before telling them," Darcy said.

"You know that's not true. Since when did you care about other people's opinions?" Jane asked. Darcy was spared from answering when a maid entered to announce Lizzy and Bingley's arrival.

Darcy and Jane stood up. Jane's legs trembled like jelly as Mr. Bingley and Lizzy entered the room. Darcy tried to curtsy and fell slightly forward so Lizzy reached out and caught him. He looked into her eyes and saw such merriment in them that he had never seen when he looked at his own reflection.

Darcy stood back up laughed off his mishap. "It is a fine day!" Exclaimed Bingley. "Shall we visit Hyde Park?" Jane and Darcy thought this was a wonderful idea. Since Mrs. Gardiner and Maria were running an errand and Mr. Gardiner was at work they told the housekeeper that they were going and headed for the carriage.

When they arrived at the park Jane and Bingley headed off in one direction and Lizzy and Darcy in the other. Lizzy and Darcy sat down on a bench under a tree.

"I can't believe you said we were engaged!" Lizzy said.

"It was the only thing I could think of," came the reply. Lizzy threw her hands up in frustration.

"I suppose it never occurred to you to just pull me away?" she asked. Darcy was silent. "Never mind it's done now. But how are we going to get out of this mess?"

"We could just call the engagement off," answered Darcy. "We'll say we changed our minds; that we don't want anyone else finding out we were engaged and to anyone else we'll say the papers made the story up."

"Fantastic idea! My mother won't find out and Caroline will stop planning assassination tactics." Darcy roared with laughter then went quiet.

"I am sorry for what Miss Bingley said about you. It is all completely false what she said. If anyone is ill-mannered it is her."

Lizzy smiled warmly. "Thank you," she replied, "It does not matter what she said. She is jealous that is all. I would say the same thing if it was the man I loved."

Darcy stared at Lizzy curiously. They then saw Jane and Bingley walking towards them both with big smiles. As they got closer Darcy bent over and whispered in Lizzy's ear. "I wish you'd consider staying engaged."

Lizzy turned and faced Darcy. The expression she received almost broke her heart.

Chapter 13(i)

Posted on Saturday, 12 February 2000

Lizzy turned back to greet Jane and Bingley; a fantastically false smile attached to her face. Jane and Bingley stopped in front of Lizzy and Darcy.

"What have you to been up to?" Lizzy asked innocently. Darcy rolled his eyes and looked away. As if she doesn't know!

Jane bowed her head coyly while Bingley stepped forward with a huge grin. "I am very pleased to announce that I have proposed to Miss Bennet and she has consented to be my wife!"

"Congratulations!" cried Lizzy. She stood up and stepped forward desperately wanting to give Jane a hug and a kiss. She was bending over when she felt a sharp pain in the back of her ankle. She turned around just in time to see Darcy tuck his feat under his skirt. Lizzy then realised the impropriety of her situation and turned and held her hand out to Bingley.

Out of the corner of her eye Lizzy saw Darcy rise and hug Jane. She felt more than a little jealous at the closeness between Darcy and HER Jane.

"Mr. Bingley is to come Hertfordshire to see Papa," said Jane her radiant smile already making Darcy's cheeks ache in sympathy.

"Yes, and I was wondering if you would like to stay at Netherfield with me, Darcy," continued Bingley.

"Will Miss Bingley be coming?" asked Lizzy with dread. Bingley chuckled.

"No. I think it would be best to let Caroline stew in her own juices for a while. I'll let Louisa handle her for the time being." Lizzy breathed a sign of relief. She wouldn't have to watch her back every time she was alone in a room then!

"In that case I would love to stay at Netherfield with you," replied Lizzy.

"I thought you would. It would give you a chance to ask Mr. Bennet permission."

Permission? She wondered. Why do I have to ask Papa's permission? Lizzy looked at Darcy who was eyeing her intently. She groaned in memory. She shook her head slowly at Darcy. The pain on his face was obvious but he understood.

"Yes I can do that," Lizzy replied quietly and she and Darcy made a silent agreement to tell them later.

Lizzy, Darcy, Bingley and Jane arrived back at the Gardiners later. They stopped for tea before Lizzy and Bingley left.

"Well I must say I have never met more charming men in my whole life," Mrs. Gardiner remarked once they were alone, much to Mr. Gardiner's amusement, "Excepting your uncle of course," she added. Darcy and Jane grinned at each other.

"I agree. Especially your Mr. Darcy, Lizzy. He is a lively man, if ever I saw one. You suit each other very much," Mr. Gardiner said. Darcy thought about this. Never in his life had he been considered a lively man. It was obvious everyone preferred Lizzy as him than himself.

"He is not my Mr. Darcy anymore," Darcy said wistfully. "Today I decided to call off the engagement. I think it would be better if we were only friends."

Every one was stunned. "Oh Lizzy," Jane sighed. Darcy tried to smile but was failing miserably.

"Well, on second thoughts I don't think I like that Darcy fellow. Far to familiar and talks too much. You'd be better off without him." Said Mr. Gardiner with a guilty look on his face.

"Do not worry Lizzy, it will be alright. We'll just pretend it didn't happen and won't mention it again," Mrs. Gardiner said giving Darcy a hug.

"Thank you," Darcy responded quietly.

"In fact I know just the thing to cheer you up," continued Mrs. Gardiner. "Tomorrow we shall go shopping! That will surely make you less melancholy."

Darcy sighed in exasperation. Could this week be any worse?

Chapter 13(ii)

Posted on Saturday, 19 February 2000

Lizzy and Bingley trudged back into Darcy's house. They were greeted by Georgiana and sat down for tea. Lizzy picked up her cup, her little finger sticking straight in the air.

"Why are you holding your cup like that Darcy?" Bingley asked curiously. Lizzy blushed profusely and curled her finger back down.

"I, uh, caught it in the carriage door earlier and it hurts," she muttered. Georgiana looked over her finger and tut-tuttered gently. "There's something I wanted to tell you both," Lizzy said nervously.

Bingley and Georgiana put their cups down and focused on Lizzy. "As you know, last night I was engaged to Miss Elizabeth Bennet," Lizzy began. "Well, today she decided she wanted to call off our engagement."

"Oh Fitzwilliam!" Cried Georgiana as she threw her arms around Lizzy's neck.

"And to think I was suggesting you ask her father for permission just as she turned you down," Bingley said apologetically.

"I thank you both for your consideration, but it is not that bad. We have decided to remain friends, and so I do not feel much pain," said Lizzy.

"I don't suppose you want to go to Hertfordshire then," Bingley sighed dejectedly. Georgiana loosened her grasp about Lizzy's neck and stared at Lizzy, very hurt.

"You are going away again, just as you came back?" she asked with puppy dog eyes.

"I, uh..." Lizzy spluttered.

"It wouldn't be so bad Georgiana, you would have Caroline and Louisa to keep you company," Charles said trying to comfort Georgiana. This effort only produced a greater wail.

"Nooo!!" Cried Georgiana, "Please don't leave me with them!!" Lizzy checked Bingley's reaction and saw he was hiding a smile under his hand.

"If you don't want me to leave you then I won't," said Lizzy. Georgiana seemed very fragile and she desperately didn't want to hurt her.

"Perhaps Georgiana can come with us," Bingley suggested. "You will have our company and I think you'll find the society in Meryton quiet charming." Bingley expected a remark from Lizzy about savages and such, but he received nothing.

Georgiana nodded her head vigorously. Lizzy laughed. "I think she wants to come," she said.

"Then it is settled!" Bingley cried and they all clinked their cups of tea together.

The next day dawned upon Darcy who sat up in bed having a nightmare about a knife-wielding Caroline Bingley pursuing him through the theatre. Darcy wiped the sweat off his brow and called for his maid.

Mrs. Gardiner, the girls and one gentleman in the body of a woman were going shopping! All Maria could talk about at breakfast was periwinkle-coloured ribbons and white bonnets. By the time they all stepped into the cottage both Darcy and the usually passive Jane would have strangled Maria with one of her periwinkle ribbons.

They made their way to a lane full of the fine shops. Mrs. Gardiner led them straight to a place that sold bonnets and ribbons just to shut Maria up. While Mrs. Gardiner and Jane were discussing a certain fabric Darcy stood in the corner trying on bonnets for a laugh.

He noticed a quite gaudy one with feather and jewels all around it quiet like those that Caroline Bingley would wear. He popped it on his head and was mimicking Caroline in the mirror, sucking his cheeks in and looking down his nose.

Darcy did not notice the shopkeeper had come up behind him and was watching curiously. "You have a very fine taste in hats," she said. Darcy spun around with a start. He thumped his hand against his chest and let out a breath. The shopkeeper continued. "Do you in intend in purchasing that bonnet?" she asked.

Darcy couldn't speak a word but shook his head and walked away quickly. He grabbed Jane arm and pulled her out of the shop, calling "We're just going next door, Aunt."

The rest of the week went very quickly for both parties. During that time Bingley had managed to tell Caroline that Darcy's engagement was off, and he was quite anxious to escape her constant cries about "Poor Mr. Darcy."

They left on the same day. Darcy was very sad to leave Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner. He now realised that Lizzy had quiet good relatives especially when comparing them to Lady Catherine, and that he should never be ashamed to know the Gardiners.

"Goodbye Lizzy," Mrs. Gardiner said, giving Darcy a big hug. "We will come and visit very soon!" Jane and Maria said their good-byes and they were off home to Longbourn.

It did not seem like such a long trip as Darcy had Jane in the carriage with him to keep him sane. They drove to the inn and stepped out just in time to hear Lydia and Kitty cry out "Jane! Lizzy!" Darcy looked up and heard the high pitched laughs that followed and discreetly began rubbing his temples.

Chapter 14

Posted on Monday, 20 March 2000

Darcy, Jane and Maria trundled into the inn. They were bowled over by Lydia and Kitty, both anxious to inform Jane and Darcy of the events that occurred over the last few weeks. The moment Darcy stepped in the door, Lydia shoved a bonnet in his face.

"What do you think, Lizzy?" Lydia cried as Darcy examined the hideous thing in his hand. He would not have wished the bonnet on his worst enemy and decided to be straight with Lydia. After all she WAS his sister.

"It's horrible!" admitted Darcy and Jane nodded in agreement. "What were you thinking when you bought it?"

"Well there were more far worse then this and I intend to see if I could make it into something better as soon as I get home. Besides it doesn't matter what I wear for the militia are leaving in a fortnight!" Lydia exclaimed with a stamp of her foot.

"Are they really?" Darcy asked, hiding a grin behind his hand. They sat down at the table where Lydia and Kitty had arranged a meal for them.

"Why yes, they are encamped at Brighton for the summer. Mama, Kitty and I should dearly like to go but papa has refused to take us."

"Well I daresay that's very wise decision, Lydia. Honestly, you don't want to go to Brighton, it's far too over crowded," said Darcy as he bit into a piece of cucumber. Lydia and Kitty stared at Darcy in shock and displeasure.

"How would you know Lizzy? It's not like you have ever been to Brighton," Lydia sulked, "I don't want you to influence papa either. If there's still a chance we could go I don't want you meddling."

Darcy just raised his eyebrows in amusement. Jane blushed for the man who was standing by the door's sake and dismissed him. Maria was used to Lydia's outbursts and was thinking of another subject that would cause her to blow.

"What other news do you have from Meryton?" Maria asked. Lydia racked her brains then jumped up.

"Oh, I have left out the best news of all. Though I don't know if you deserve to hear it Lizzy. Anyway its about Wickham and Mary King!" Lydia replied.

Mary King? Thought Darcy. Never in his life had he heard about a Mary King but if she was somehow connected with Wickham he couldn't help but pity the poor girl.

"Who is Mary King?" Darcy asked. Lydia, Kitty and Maria shrieked with laughter.

"Oh what a good joke Lizzy! Who is Mary King, indeed. I should wish to forget her as soon as possible and you may. For she is not to marry Wickham after all!" Darcy fumed inside. So Wickham had plans to marry again, he thought bitterly. "Mary King has gone to her uncle at Liverpool and Wickham is safe!"

"Or should we say Mary King is safe," remarked Darcy. "There is something you should know. Wickham is not the sort of man to be trusted, so it would be better if you forget about him as soon as he leaves for Brighton."

Lydia laughed her high pitched laugh. "I think you are just jealous that Wickham went after Mary King when you wanted him all to yourself." Lydia took the drop in Darcy's face as a confirmation. In reality, though, Darcy was still distressed that Wickham had sucked Lizzy in and everyone knew it.

Jane wisely changed the subject. She could sense that Darcy was not revealing something to them and she didn't want to pressure him too much. The rest of the meal went by smoothly enough, although Lydia and Kitty controlled most of the conversation by gossiping about Chamberlayne's cross-dressing habits.

Not far away, travelling in a fine carriage were Lizzy, Bingley and Georgiana. Lizzy could not help smiling as she watched Georgiana gasp over how beautiful Hertfordshire was. She couldn't agree more.

"So, Darcy Old Chap, do you fancy a ride when we get to Hertfordshire? I thought it might be amusing to give Mrs. Bennet a start when we show up at her door." Bingley sat forward on his chair in anticipation. Lizzy chuckled.

"Honestly Bingley, you are forgetting that Miss Bennet won't be ready for you to see until tomorrow at least. It would be quite rude for you to turn up before she has a chance to empty her trunk and pick out her best clothes," she said with a wink at Georgiana, who giggled.

Bingley sighed. " I suppose you are right. But first thing tomorrow morning I expect you to be ready to go visiting," he said with a grin. Lizzy nodded her head enthusiastically. What a fine joke it would be to see Darcy with her mother!

"Oh my dear Jane! Lizzy!" cried Mrs. Bennet. She trotted out the front door and greeted Darcy and Jane with a kiss. "My dear girls, how are you? Oh Jane you look positively radiant! But you always were a beauty. Lizzy? Are you all right? You seem very pale, I hope you haven't brought influenza with you!"

Darcy frowned at this absurd suggestion but was saved by Mr. Bennet. "Mrs. Bennet leave poor Lizzy alone. How are you my dears? I'm very glad you've come back for there has not been two sensible words said in the same sentence since you left!" Darcy grinned. He could believe that very easily.

"Oh come inside!" Mrs. Bennet gushed, "You must tell me all your news. Now Jane, did you go to many parties while you were in London?" Darcy let Mrs. Bennet words fade as they entered the house. He was surprised when he felt Mr. Bennet put his arm through his.

"Now Lizzy, I simply must hear all about the chimneys at Rosings," Mr. Bennet said with a wink.

Darcy managed to dodge Mrs. Bennet's conversation that night. Luckily Jane was more than willing to tell Mrs. Bennet all about her stay in London. Darcy viewed everyone very intently. He wasn't surprised to find that Mr. Bennet ducked into his study as soon as dinner was over.

It felt strange to Darcy but he was starting to admire the Bennets. They were a real family, a father, mother and five daughters. With just Georgiana and himself, it was easy to feel alone and unloved but one would never feel this way here. Never again would he abuse the Bennets as a whole. He wasn't about to say the same thing about Mrs. Bennet though.

That night Darcy sat in front of the mirror staring at Lizzy's face. He lifted his hand and touched his face, something he had always wanted to do since the party at the Lucas'. It had lost its meaning though. It wasn't the same as having the real Lizzy staring back at him with her smiling eyes and teasing smile.

Only three miles away Lizzy stood at the window of her bedroom and stared across the dark fields. She longed to be at home and couldn't wait to visit with Bingley tomorrow. She wondered how Darcy was getting on and she envisioned him gossiping about the regiment with Kitty and Lydia, discussing religion with Mary and talking about the Longs latest gathering. Then she saw Jane sitting sweetly in her chair and her father teasing her mother and she frowned.

Lizzy lay down on her bed and sobbed quietly. Her knees buckled up and she buried her face in the pillow. She stayed in this position until morning.

Chapter 15

Posted on Wednesday, 19 April 2000

Mr. Darcy woke up with a start in the unfamiliar surroundings of Elizabeth Bennet's bedroom. He groaned and rubbed the bridge of his nose as Mrs. Bennet waddled into his room and stood at the end of his bed. What a sight to wake up to, he grimaced.

"Lizzy! Get up! You'll never guess who has arrived at Netherfield!" Mrs. Bennet shrieked as she excitedly grabbed Darcy's foot and waggled it.

"Who?" Darcy asked, as he widened his eyes mock surprise.

"Why Mr. Bingley of course! Lord knows why he's here but he has a great nerve to show his face in my opinion. For he has brought with him that horrible Mr. Darcy and his sister Miss Darcy. One would think he would be ashamed to shove Miss Darcy in dear Jane's face."

Darcy sighed and swung his legs over the sighed of the bed. "I am sure you misunderstand him Mother. I have it under good authority that Mr. Bingley only thinks of Miss Darcy as his sister."

Of those two sentences Mrs. Bennet only picked up on one word. "Lizzy! What do you think you are doing, calling me Mother! You know that I dislike that word for it makes me feel old. Oh you do not know how much I suffer!" And with that she ran from the room in tears.

Well, mused Darcy, If that wasn't half over-reacting. He got dressed easily for he had now no reason to bind his eyes since his discovery of the female form. It was his opinion that since he was no longer in a male form he no longer had to be a gentleman. And what Lizzy didn't know certainly wouldn't hurt her.

He waltzed into the drawing room and found Lizzy and Georgiana. His first instinct was to give them both a big hug but that was smothered regretfully. He greeted Lizzy and Georgiana and sat down at the table. Lydia, Kitty and Mary had all walked into town early that morning. Georgiana and Jane looked anxiously between Darcy and Lizzy, still believing them to be pining for each other after their broken engagement.

Mrs. Bennet, who was still smarting from her run in with Darcy that morning, purposefully ignored his entrance. Instead she turned to Jane and with a wink and a loud voice remarked, "I wonder why Mr. Bingley has gone to see Mr. Bennet?"

"Love the subtlety," Darcy remarked under his breath as he attempted to embroider a cushion. Lizzy who had been watching Darcy curiously saw the words spill off his lips. The niggling feeling in her head that just wanted her to yell "Bad Man!" came back and she bit her lip and crinkled her nose in disgust.

Mrs. Bennet could fell the enthusiasm in the room dropping. "It is a fine day! When Mr. Bingley has finished talking to Mr. Bennet about, well whatever, I suggest you should all take a trip in his carriage."

Lizzy and Jane were greatly embarrassed at their mother's assumption but when Lizzy rose her eyes to see Mr. Darcy's reaction she was surprised to find intent with his needlework. Even through her own face she could see the resemblance to the day at Netherfield when he was concentrating on his letter to Georgiana. It couldn't help but send shivers down her spine.

After having two such different but intense thoughts about Mr. Darcy in a period of only a few moments Lizzy felt a strong urge to stand by the window. She stood up and strode over to the great delight of Mr. Darcy.

Before the electricity projected between Darcy and Lizzy could invent a light bulb Mr. Bingley burst into the room with a huge smile on his face. "It is a fine day!" he remarked rather loudly, although everyone excused him as a man in love. "Shall we not all take a ride in my carriage."

A feeling of déjŕ vu spread between the room's occupants but they all ignored it because it wasn't invented yet. They wholeheartedly agreed except Georgiana who felt like a spare wheel and decided to be dropped back at Netherfield.

Once this was done they drove of through the countryside until they spotted a picturesque meadow and decided to stop and go for a stroll. Bingley and Jane headed in one direction while Lizzy and Darcy went the other.

Deafening silence surrounded them as they walked. Lizzy bit her lip and stared into space. Then gathering up courage she turned to Mr. Darcy. "I realise, sir, that you have had some influence over my sister's happiness. But I must admit you have done your best to fix some of the damage and I thank you."

Darcy smiled at Lizzy warmly. Lizzy continued. "While we are in this present situation Mr. Darcy I think it would be best to set our differences aside and try to be friends," And then with a humorous glint in her eye she stopped "Do you think you can manage that, sir?"

"Well," Darcy sighed rolling his eyes, "We'll see." Lizzy grinned. She bent down and picked some of the wild flowers that were at her feet and offered them to Darcy as a symbol of friendship. He took them and laughed.

It was at that moment that Bingley happened to turn around and happened to see the person he took as Darcy hand flowers to the person he took as Lizzy. "My dear Jane, what do you think of the possibility of a double wedding?" he said with a grin.

No words could describe the elation she felt over Jane and Bingley's engagement. Not an hour had gone since Bingley had come back form seeing Mr. Bennet when she was already planning the guest list. The whole family was overjoyed with the match.

"Ah Lizzy," remarked Mrs. Bennet to Darcy one evening not soon after Bingley and Jane's engagement was announced. "What do you think of this happy business of Jane's. They must have seen a great deal of each other in London."

Darcy nodded in agreement. He was un-picking his embroidery as his arrangement of fruits were somewhat resembling a billiards table.

"I suppose you are envying their happiness Lizzy. Well you could have had it to if you hadn't turned down Mr. Collins. I'm only glad that we have Mr. Bingley now to make sure that we will not be on the streets once your father dies."

"What?!" Darcy cried. He marched out the door he needed fresh air to think. Mr. Collins had proposed to Lizzy. His Lizzy! The sheer thought made him feel violently ill. Without any sense of direction he walked onwards.

Somehow we managed to find his way to Netherfield. He emerged from a group of trees and stumbled upon Lizzy.

"Mr. Darcy!" she cried in astonishment.

"Miss Bennet!" he replied. Feeling mischievous he said, "I have come to inquire after my sister."

"On foot?" Lizzy asked with a grin as she remembered their conversation.

"As you see. Would you be so kind as to take me to her?" Lizzy led the way. She inquired after everyone's health at home.

"They are all fine. Miss Bennet, I hope you don't find me rude but I must ask you something." Darcy said nervously.

"Yes?" Lizzy urged.

"Did Mr. Collins actually ask you to marry him?" he asked with dread on his face.

Lizzy laughed "He did indeed but I flat out refused him and now you see he his married to Charlotte and we are all happy." Darcy breathed out a sigh of release.

"It seems you have not had much luck with proposals Miss Bennet." Remarked Darcy.

"Yes I must admit it does," replied Lizzy remembering the circumstances that landed her in this position.

"Perhaps that will change soon," Darcy said with a mysterious smile and walked on ahead of her into the house. Lizzy looked after him, her very curious brain running overtime.

Chapter 16

Posted on Saturday, 2 September 2000

The days were long and the nights all too short in the weeks following the announcement of Bingley and Jane's wedding. An elated Mrs. Bennet quickly got on Darcy's nerves and Lizzy began to see that she would never be able to marry anyone with quite as good a disposition as Charles when she started to hum the songs he was whistling at night in bed.

In order to escape the merriment, Darcy and Lizzy went on long walks with no real destination. They would bicker and banter and whine and generally keep each other sane. There was a silent agreement that when the time came for them to marry they wouldn't dare be as sappy as Jane or Bingley.

The only member of the household who was feeling melancholy was Lydia. She had been denied the pleasure of going to Brighton with the militia and had moaned and groaned her way through the days, driving Darcy and Mr Bennet up the wall.

Then one day and out of the blue, Lydia came bounding into the house, hair wild, skirts flying and bosom busting, scaring the wits out of poor Darcy, causing him to fumble his piano scales. "AAGH!" Lydia screamed and she then ran out the room. Darcy tilted to the side, watched her leave and then went back to his scales. "CDEFGABCBAGFEDC. Yay!"

Darcy didn't hear anything else from Lydia until she came back in with Mr and Mrs. Bennet, a grin from ear to ear of her evil face.

"Oh Lizzy I get to go to Brighton with Mrs. Forster as her particular friend. Isn't that simply wonderful!

Darcy reddened "What?!" His high pitched voice didn't quite have the effect he was looking for and so he began shaking his fists in anger.

"What's the matter Lizzy?" asked Lydia, innocently. "I think you are jealous because you don't get to spend your summer with a person whose name begins with W and ends in M, and I do!"

"Lizzy, don't be so childish! Can't you at least be pleased for your sister when she has such a fine stroke of luck?" sighed Mrs. Bennet, holding her youngest daughter protectively.

Darcy's eyes darkened considerably. "Sir may I see you in person," he said to Mr Bennet and he flounced out the door leaving the others with the image of bouncing curls and long strides.

Darcy entered Mr Bennet's study and sat down on the chair with a slump. He crossed his arms and stared at the row of books in front of him. Mr Bennet entered quietly behind him and sat down at his desk.

"Now Lizzy, are you going to explain to me why you behaved in such a spectacle just now?" he asked with an amused expression.

Darcy sighed. "Surely you're not actually letting Lydia go on this trip to Brighton?"

"Of course I am. Lizzy, you know as well as I that if I did not let Lydia go she would poison our tea in spite. It is much better for the safety of all of us if she went and got it over with."

"Again sir, I must speak against it. Lydia is such a flirt that she may end up in a situation that will be a source of pain to our family. She would not be under our guidance and could find herself in great danger!"

"Lizzy calm down!" laughed Mr Bennet. "You have become far to paranoid my dear. Lydia may not be the smartest of young girls but we must credit her with enough sense to keep out of trouble" Darcy snorted and turned away. Well no one could say I didn't try, he thought.

He shared the details of his conversation with Lizzy the next time he saw her. She was distressed but knew their was no way she would be able to convince her father as Mr Darcy, who he disliked so.

Two days before the militia and Lydia were set to leave Mrs. Bennet organized a tea party at Longbourn and the officers, Lucases and Netherfield party were invited to attend. Georgiana declined but the rest were there ready to kick their heels amongst the crockery. Darcy was standing at one side of the room, drinking his tea while Lizzy stood at the other making suggestive glances, trying to ruffle Darcy's feathers. Maria Lucas was in between them thinking that Mr Darcy was starting to lose his marbles slightly.

"Miss Bennet," Darcy turned round and stared at the person standing before her. It was Wickham. Darcy's eyes narrowed considerably.

"It is very good to see you again Miss Bennet. I trust you enjoyed your stay at Hunsford?"

"I did. Colonel Fitzwilliam and Mr Darcy were there also so we had a pleasant time," Darcy said, lying only moderately. "Do you know the Colonel?" Wickham turned slightly pale and Darcy grinned in triumph.

"Yes," replied Wickham, "He is a good man, very different to his cousin."

"You are quite mistaken about Mr Darcy. He is one of the kindest, gentlest creatures alive," said Darcy.

Lizzy, who was speaking with Sir William, and had overheard every word of the conversation, snorted loudly. Sir William stopped halfway through his sentence stared at Lizzy and then resumed speaking.

Wickham looked at Lizzy then leaned in close to Darcy.

"I don't know how you came to that conclusion," he said quietly, "But you can be sure anyone who brings up a sister as Georgiana Darcy is not as virtuous as you think."

Darcy saw red. He lunged at Wickham grabbing him by the shoulders and lifting his knees, kicking him in the nether regions. Wickham fell to the floor with a gasp.

This sparked off a set of reactions from the members of the room. Mrs. Bennet screamed, Lydia cried, Mrs. Lucas covered her eyes, Maria stared with her mouth open, Mr Bennet laughed, Mary resumed playing the piano, Sir William fainted, Darcy ran out the room and Lizzy slipped out after him.

---