Desire Never Leaves The Poetry of Tim Lilburn

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Desire Never Leaves

The Poetry of Tim Lilburn

Selected
with an
introduction by
Alison Calder
and an
afterword by
Tim Lilburn

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We acknowledge the support of the Canada Council for the Arts for our publishing pro-
gram. We acknowledge the financial support of the Government of Canada through the
Book Publishing Industry Development Program for our publishing activities.

Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

Lilburn, Tim, 1950

Desire never leaves : the poetry of Tim Lilburn / selected, with an introduction, by

Alison Calder ; and an afterword by Tim Lilburn.

(Laurier poetry series)
Includes bibliographical references.
isbn-13: 978-0-88920-514-7
isbn-10: 0-88920-514-0

i. Calder, Alison C. (Alison Claire), 1969– ii. Title. iii. Series.

ps8573.i427a6 2007

c811'.54

c2006-906448-2

© 2007 Wilfrid Laurier University Press
Waterloo, Ontario, Canada n2l 3c5
www.wlupress.wlu.ca

Cover image: Pamela Woodland, Untitled, © 2004. Colour photograph.

Cover and text design by P. J. Woodland.

Every reasonable effort has been made to acquire permission for copyright material
used in this text, and to acknowledge all such indebtedness accurately. Any errors and
omissions called to the publisher’s attention will be corrected in future printings.

'

This book is printed on 100% post-consumer recycled paper.

Printed in Canada

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or trans-
mitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior written consent of the publisher
or a licence from The Canadian Copyright Licensing Agency (Access Copyright). For an
Access Copyright licence, visit www.accesscopyright.ca or call toll free to 1-800 -893-
5777.

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iii

Table of Contents

Foreword, Neil Besner / v

Biographical Note / vi

Introduction, Alison Calder / vii

Names Of God / 1

1 Love At The Center Of Objects / 1

2 Allah Of The Green Circuitry / 1

3 Light’s Gobbling Eye / 2

Theophany And Argument / 3

Pumpkins / 5

Fervourino To A Barn Of Milking Doe Goats

Early Easter Morning / 7

Call To Worship In A Mass For The Life Of The World / 9

Elohim Mocks His Images For The Life Of The World / 11

I Bow To It / 13

Spirit Of Agriculture, 1986 / 14

In The Hills, Watching / 18

Contemplation Is Mourning / 19

How To Be Here? / 20

Restoration / 23

Pitch / 24

There Is No Presence / 25

A Book Of Exhaustion / 29

Kill-Site / 32

There / 39

Afterword: Walking Out of Silence, Tim Lilburn / 41

Acknowledgements

/ 49

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v

Foreword

At the beginning of the twenty-first century, poetry in Canada—writing and
publishing it, reading and thinking about it—finds itself in a strangely con-
flicted place. We have many strong poets continuing to produce exciting new
work, and there is still a small audience for poetry; but increasingly, poetry
is becoming a vulnerable art, for reasons that don’t need to be rehearsed.

But there are things to be done: we need more real engagement with our

poets. There needs to be more access to their work in more venues—in class-
rooms, in the public arena, in the media—and there needs to be more, and
more different kinds of publications, that make the wide range of our con-
temporary poetry more widely available.

The hope that animates this new series from Wilfrid Laurier University

Press is that these volumes will help to create and sustain the larger reader-
ship that contemporary Canadian poetry so richly deserves. Like our fiction
writers, our poets are much celebrated abroad; they should just as properly
be better known at home.

Our idea has been to ask a critic (sometimes herself a poet) to select thirty-

five pages of poetry from across a poet’s career; write an engaging, accessible
introduction; and have the poet write an afterword. In this way, we think that
the usual practice of teaching a poet through eight or twelve poems from an
anthology will be much improved upon; and readers in and out of classrooms
will have more useful, engaging, and comprehensive introductions to a poet’s
work. Readers might also come to see more readily, we hope, the connections
among, as well as the distances between, the life and the work.

It was the ending of an Al Purdy poem that gave Margaret Laurence the

epigraph for The Diviners: “but they had their being once / and left a place
to stand on.” Our poets still do, and they are leaving many places to stand on.
We hope that this series will help, variously, to show how and why this is so.

—Neil Besner

General Editor

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vi

Biographical Note

Tim Lilburn was born in Regina, Saskatchewan, on June 27, 1950. He was
trained as a Jesuit and spent many years teaching philosophy and creative
writing at the University of Saskatchewan in Saskatoon and St. Peter’s College
in Muenster, Saskatchewan. He has taught in West Africa and herded goats in
Ontario. He currently lives in Victoria, BC, where he teaches Creative Writing
at the University of Victoria.

Lilburn has written six poetry collections, among them Tourist to Ecstasy

(1989), which was shortlisted for the Governor General’s Award for poetry,
and Moosewood Sandhills (1994), which won the Canadian Authors Associa-
tion Award. From the Great Above She Opened Her Ear to the Great Below
(1988) is a collaboration with visual artist Susan Shantz. In 1999, he won two
Saskatchewan Book Awards: the Nonfiction Award for his collection of essays,
Living in the World As If It Were Home, and the Book of the Year Award for
the poetry book To the River. He has also edited, and contributed to, two
anthologies of essays about poetry and philosophy: Thinking and Singing:
Poetry and the Practice of Philosophy
and Poetry and Knowing. His latest poetry
collection, Kill-Site, won the Governor General’s Award in 2003. His work is
widely anthologized.

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vii

Introduction

Tim Lilburn’s poetry should come with two instructions to the reader: have
courage, and relax. Have courage because the poetry, on first glance, can
appear daunting; relax because, well, it’s beautiful words on a page. So you
don’t know all about these characters “Nicholas of Cusa” or “Paul Celan”?
Relax and listen to the music. An expert on classical music will have a different
experience of a Beethoven symphony than a non-expert will, but they’ll both
enjoy the concert. Lilburn’s poetry is no different. His well-crafted lyrics, both
thoughtful and artful, treat the basic objects of the world around us at the
same time as they gesture towards something that words themselves cannot
express. The resulting verse mixes the profane and the sacred, ultimately
insisting on the necessary coexistence of both.

Lilburn writes about place very intensively, but his poetry may not provide

what readers of “prairie poetry” expect. One strand of prairie poetry, heavily
influenced by the writings of Robert Kroetsch, Dennis Cooley, and Andy
Suknaski, uses vernacular speech to provide a record of prairie experience.
This kind of poetry is narrative, conversational, and often, though not always,
accessible. It may also rely on the convention of the lyric narrator, a voice
confessing its thoughts. Another strand of prairie poetry, to which I think
Lilburn is much more closely aligned, comes down through writers like Anne
Szumigalski and shows up in poetry like that of Jan Zwicky, whose lyrics
draw on a wide range of subject matter and philosophical and literary influ-
ences to produce an eclectic mix of voices. The distinction between these two
strands —John Deere vs. John Donne, let us say —is in some ways artificial, as
vernacular poetry also draws on a wide range of influences, and more formal
poetry often speaks directly to immediate prairie experience. Nonetheless,
Lilburn’s poetry uses different conventions than those usually called “prairie,”
and thus requires a different kind of readerly approach. He doesn’t give us a
solid narrator for us to ground our readings in. He mixes the wordplay of
Gerard Manley Hopkins with the whimsy of Dylan Thomas, pinning it all to
philosophical questions raised by early Christian mystics and Classical Greek
thinkers. His work starts with the prairie, but it does not end there; the place
with which he is concerned is the larger world viewed through close attention
to environmental detail. Lilburn is a thinking poet; he’s working through

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viii / Introduction

various tough questions about the relation of the human to the environment
and the artist to the Divine, and none of these elements can be separated
from the others. He’s working hard, and it behooves readers to put a little
effort into their readings too. He’s not running counter to “prairie writing”;
he’s expanding the category.

Though Lilburn’s poetry draws on religious and philosophical languages

born far from the prairie, his poems continually insist on their here-ness. They
are about somewhere in particular, and where they are located needs to be
looked at carefully. Living in the World As If It Were Home, the title of his essay
collection, points to this connection with the immediate environment. But
what does it really mean to live in the world? And what is lying in wait in that
tricky phrase “as if,” waiting to trip us up?

Central to Lilburn’s poetics are the concepts of eros and sorrow. Eros, or

erotic love, is the desire that one has for the beloved. For Lilburn it is also the
desire that one has to connect with the divine presence immanent in the
natural world, the desire to get at the essence of the world, its soul. Sorrow
results from the recognition that this connection is impossible —how can we
possibly know the essential natures of other things? What makes the deer a
deer will always surpass our understanding. This desire to express the inex-
pressible is part of a long poetic tradition; in fact, one might argue that it is
from this desire that poetry sprang in the first place. Think of metaphor and
simile. If a poet writes “my luve’s like a red, red rose,” as Robbie Burns does,
that saying is not strictly true, yet we know what the poet means. The words
have pointed to something beyond themselves, while at the same time keeping
a measure of themselves hidden: neither the love nor the rose is captured
fully on the page. Lilburn’s metaphors are often erotic and sensual, perhaps
unexpected in writing about landscape. But in his use of erotic language, he
follows a well-established tradition of Christian mysticism, taking his cue
from eleventh- and twelfth-century writers like Bernard of Clairvaux and
Margery Kemp (see Barratt and Dalrymple). Like these early writers, Lilburn’s
yearning for connection with the divine is expressed in solidly physical terms.
His poems bounce with physical and sensual imagery —sights, sounds, smells,
sometimes blending into an ecstatic synaesthetic experience.

What does Lilburn’s poetry desire? Nothing less than the recovery of a lost

unity with the world and with the divine forces immanent in it. Another
prairie artist, Joni Mitchell, suggested that we’ve got to get back to the garden,
and Lilburn’s complex and intricate poetry tries to work through a way of
doing that. But in Lilburn’s thinking, we will never come to know the world
as we want to. The resulting sorrow is what motivates us to keep trying to
connect with the world. If we don’t feel sorrow, if we think that this time

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Introduction /

ix

we’ve made the connection, then we’ve gone wrong. Lilburn’s poetry is like
tossing stones towards a target you know you’re never going to hit. It may
seem silly to keep throwing, but gradually, if you look at where the stones fall,
you may discern a pattern, a vague shape outlining your target. You’re never
going to be able to strike it; but in your different throws you may discover
different ways of approaching it, maybe even getting a little closer.

To think that one can encompass the world with language is inherently

conceited. The key to overcoming this conceit, according to Lilburn, is to
know that writing a poem is like carrying water in a sieve. Because language is
so faulty, you’re never going to be able to say what you mean, just as you can
never see the true essence of things. “The grass is a mirror that clouds as the
bright look goes in,” he writes in the poem “In The Hills, Watching.” You can
look, but your vision will always be obscured. Seeing the true face of the
natural world is like seeing the true face of God —impossible. To believe that
you can do either, and that you can then express this vision in language, is an
act of arrogance that leads to the attempt to “command” the natural world
(Living 60). Instead, argues Lilburn, “everything exceeds its name…. The
mysterium of the world is a theophany of what is not there” (Living 61). The
word deer, the human idea of the deer, is not the deer itself. As one Buddhist
precept goes, the finger pointing at the moon is not the moon. Confusing
the artist’s words with the world is the arrogant act. To avoid arrogance, know
your limits. The world itself will always exceed them. This excessive nature
of the world is one reason, I think, for the deluge of metaphors present in
Lilburn’s poetry. A deer’s body is “a border crossing, a wall, and a perfume” in
“Contemplation Is Mourning,” pumpkins are “earth hogs,” “blimpish Prussian
generals,” “garden sausages,” and “golden zeppelins” in “Pumpkins.” Over and
over he tosses the stone, the metaphor, and each time comes up a little short.
Sorrow: but then he tries again.

In Living in the World As If It Were Home, Lilburn argues against the pro-

jection of the human ego into the world, against an anthropocentric world-
view that sees the world only as the background to human activity. Instead, he
calls for a kind of “poetic attention” that seeks not to appropriate the world,
but to stand alongside it. So, how to do this? Lilburn turns to ascetic and
contemplative practices. Stripping away the external trappings of the world,
the poet separates himself from distractions and tries to empty himself out so
that he can receive what the world has to give him. For Lilburn, contemplating
the prairie landscape is crucial. The prairie has been described as a minimalist
landscape, already scraped down to the bare essentials. In a sense, it serves as a
model for the contemplative poet: without the overblown greenness of the
West Coast or the busy highways of Southern Ontario, the prairie shows its

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bones and encourages the poet to do the same. The early Desert Fathers went
out into the desert to seek God. Contemplation of the prairie landscape allows
Lilburn a similar gathering in of the self, an accumulation of what he calls “a
density of attention.” This dense attention, unmarked by superficial distrac-
tion, is what the poet needs.

Contemplation, the act of looking, marks most of Lilburn’s writing. One

can look at the world in many ways. A writer can look at the prairie and see
it only in terms of utility, what it is “good for” in economic terms, how it can
be used by humans. In a related way, the writer can look at it and see only
herself reflected. Here, the prairie exists to provide her an opportunity to wax
rhapsodic, show off her own cleverness, and so increase her standing as poet.
This kind of appropriative gaze, which Lilburn links with much romantic
writing, never truly understands the world because it sees only itself; it’s as if
the land serves only as a mirror to reflect human achievement and power. And
a powerful argument can be made that this way of seeing the world has been
intrinsic to our understanding of the Canadian prairies since the moment of
European arrival. Instead of this dominating, human-centred look, Lilburn
proposes another way of seeing, based on humility instead of ego. He writes,
“The gaze is best, most authentic, when rooted in a posture of deference and
attention. This stance must be cultivated. Such cultivation is asceticism and it
is one with knowing. It involves submitting to be disarmed and taking on the
silence of things, the marginality and anonymity of grass, sage, lichen, things
never properly seen” (Living 22).

Seeing the prairie properly is one of Lilburn’s main concerns. The opening

of “Pitch,” the first poem in Lilburn’s collection To the River, reads, “Lay it
down, the shimmering glass” (3), where the glass is both an evocation of the
river’s reflection, and a mirror that the reader must try to put aside in order
to see not his or her own reflection, but the true face of the natural world.
The poet has to try to put aside this concern with the self as well. Words can
attempt to transcend the physical world and approach the numinous, but
poetic language is a clunky code that can only seek to approach the divine
without actually grasping it. “I live in a hole, I can’t help it” (17), says the
speaker in the third section of the poem “There Is No Presence,” reminding
readers that we are mortals made of earth, not air. Metaphors may make all
sorts of lovely leaps, but they will always, finally, crash to the ground.

Close analysis of a short piece of Lilburn’s poetry illuminates several

helpful ideas. Here is a section of the poem “There Is No Presence”:

You are good but no blond disc in the grass for you, none, no bone
of light, no little palate or gland of stupid but shining
intelligibility, the pure bride, none, none for you, in the grass prong.

x / Introduction

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A glacier of night
shoved through the centre of things. Juniper hard with absence.
You are alone in the world: the flab of the river
is anarchic, the water is feathered with ignorance,
a dangerous mirror that makes your face darkness throwing its hair.

(To the River 16)

No matter how “good” the contemplative poet is, s/he gets no reward. The
world remains unintelligible, anarchic and without order, any pattern the
result of the “dangerous mirror” in which the viewer sees his or her own face.
There may be an order here, but the poet, being human, cannot grasp it.
Again, we have the idea here also of radical otherness. There is no comfortable
oneness with the world; the poet is not at home in the land. Instead, nature
seems to be withholding itself from him, as the juniper remains “hard with
absence.” The “centre of things,” instead of revealing itself, remains dark and
cold, a “glacier of night.” Lilburn is knocking, but no one is answering the
door.

The erotic nature of Lilburn’s imagined connection to the land, seen here

in his description of “the pure bride,” is phrased in language drawn from the
traditions of Christian mysticism. We see emerging in Lilburn’s writing a
poetics of place that is based on negative theology: the poet cannot see what
the Divine is, only what it is not. Contemplation and ascetic practices are thus
not the means to an end. Rather, they are important as the processes through
which the viewers humble themselves, coming to understand the extent of
their inability to comprehend the divine. Attempts to grasp a divine presence
will always result in failure, and the viewers will always remain “alone in the
world,” conscious of the gap still remaining between themselves and the object
of their desire.

Lilburn’s writings stress the impossibility of ever holding the natural world,

but for him the result of this yearning is not alienation. Kathleen Norris,
another contemplative poet from South Dakota, writes that “the willingly
embraced desert fosters realism, not despair” (11). The contemplative poet’s
gaze, driven by a profound love of the world, does not become alienated, and
the poet does not turn his or her back on the world but instead continues to
seek it out with renewed desire. This desire remains constant throughout
Lilburn’s writings. His love is both unrequited and continually refreshed.
Norris writes that “a person could stand and watch this changing land and sky
forever…. As when I was a child, I want to remain in the open, becoming
something other than human under the sky” (178). The desire to connect with
“something other than human” marks Lilburn’s poetry. He links yearning and
consolation in his poem “There Is No Presence”:

Introduction /

xi

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xii / Introduction

There are geese over the water, flickering in bad light, something pushing

through

from the other side; here is desire,
a light round the tongue, world next
to the world, a garden that would appear if the word were found.
What glitters in things is a mountain, it can’t be held in the mouth.

(To the River 11)

But what is that “something”? What “glitters” and “flickers,” glimpsed only in
fragments, just enough to tell you that something is there? The contemplative
poet’s task here turns on the important word “if,” a word that contains simul-
taneously the exultation of possibility and the recognition of failure.

Lilburn’s poetry is profoundly political. I will go so far as to suggest that

he presents a radical challenge to accepted views of the prairie, which see it as
something to be used. After all, before European-based agricultural practices
arrived in the place, “the prairies” as a concept did not exist. The very way in
which we think about the place is inextricably tied to agricultural practice.
Thus this way of imagining the place, what Rob Shields calls “social spatiali-
zation,” is profoundly linked to economics, colonization, the idea that the
prairie exists so that people can make money from making things grow. The
most enduring symbol of the prairie, the grain elevator, is a monument to a
particular economic system. Land that is not farmed or ranched is wasted
land. There is nothing inherently bad about Alberta’s Badlands, for example;
that we still call them that shows the extent to which prairie culture has
internalized a particular ideology so that it seems natural.

The kind of contemplative attention that Lilburn proposes challenges this

appropriative view. “You cannot truly see the stone if you believe the world is
yours to do with as you will,” he writes (Living 35). There is nothing intrinsi-
cally wrong with agriculture; but there is something wrong if an agricultural
perspective becomes the only way to see the landscape. Lilburn’s writing offers
an implicit critique of consumer culture’s narcissistic world-view by focusing
closely on poetic process rather than poetic achievement. This is not to say
that the poetry itself is not an achievement —of course it is —but rather that it
doesn’t record a moment of enlightened privilege. “Contemplative knowing is
not a feeling, a rest, a peace that sweeps over one, reward for the ferocity of
one’s romantic yearnings, one’s energetic Wordsworthian peerings. Contem-
plative knowing of the deer and the hill must gather about the conviction that
neither can be known,” he writes (Living 18). Where Romantic striving (in
Lilburn’s view) results in a feeling of comfort with the world, Lilburn’s writing
never seizes the world to itself in this way. Thus the two important words “As

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If ” in the title of his essay collection, Living in the World As If It Were Home.
The poetry produced by such uncertainty is process-oriented, a record of
poetic attention, of stones being repeatedly thrown at an unhittable target,
rather than an attempt to define an experience. Lilburn’s collection To the
River
is an example of such a record: the poet-narrator continually seeks the
river, but never gets there. He is continually humbled by his clumsy attempts
to reach it, and can only wait for it to reveal itself, which it may do in flashes.
The act of writing is thus always humbling, reminding the poet of his or her
inability to express “what glitters in things” (11). The paradox is that within
this muteness lies revelation.

Alison Calder

Bibliography

Barratt, Alexandra, ed. Women’s Writing in Middle English. London: Longman, 1992.
Dalrymple, Roger. Middle English Literature. Oxford: Blackwell, 2004.
Kroetsch, Robert. The Lovely Treachery of Words. Toronto: Oxford UP, 1989.
——— . Seed Catalogue. Winnipeg: Turnstone, 1986.
Lilburn, Tim. Living in the World As If It Were Home. Dunvegan, ON: Cormorant,

1999.

——— . Names of God. Lantzville, BC: Oolichan, 1986.
——— . To the River. Toronto: McClelland and Stewart, 1999.
Norris, Kathleen. Dakota: A Spiritual Geography. Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1993.
Shields, Rob. Places on the Margin: Alternative Geographies of Modernity. London:

Routledge, 1991.

Szumigalski, Anne. On Glassy Wings: Poems New and Selected. Regina: Coteau, 1997.
Zwicky, Jan. Robinson’s Crossing. London, ON: Brick Books, 2004.

Introduction /

xiii

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The Poetry of Tim Lilburn /

1

Names Of God

for William Clarke, s.j.

i.

Love At The Center Of Objects

At the pentecostal core of matter, a fire wind
whirligig, centrifuge of joy,
is You, Love, a lung
pumping light, auric squalls
inflating eyes in my skull’s raw coal.

Ssssssst. My bloodstream and the midpoints of my bone hear fire
gouging the inner face of flame. Which speaks.
“Dress, bride, in your blood’s maroon gas,
oxygen feathers tipping each bone blue; on the red knuckle
thread desire’s compound carat;
moth skip, heart-kamikaze, and explode
vaster, vaster in the inhaling charismatic glow.”

2.

Allah Of The Green Circuitry

Salamu, my Lord.

Salamu alaikum.

You are here
for my synapses whip and sparkle
like lightninged willows,
are in tumoured air storm’s throbbing,
are wind’s ululation to my steel-shod nerves
dancing them as dust-spooked stallions.

Runners of rain trellis fire
to earth.

You ride the hissing flame,

Allah of the Green Circuitry,
to jazz with love juice the chlorophyll current
to flash sunflower, crimson, orange.

You live, ah, You
live to unflex in the crux of a woman’s dark ear,
coloured cloud
pressing into mind’s white storm.

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2 / Desire Never Leaves

3.

Light’s Gobbling Eye

O nourishing dark, O blank cloud,
You haul in my debris, compress it
in the stupendous clench of Your Heart
to nothing.

Light whorls toward You, a vanishing point
where perfection absents You; whorls
toward You, screwing
itself into its shadow core,
letting its socket eat it.

O dark gravity, we decry

this cannibalism,
though the shimmering particles stampede
with greased monomania.

I, now, feel the suck, tide
of light raking over bones, unsnarling
from joints of thought and feeling,
until I whistle into what-I-know-not,
ears imploding,
riding the bright shaft of self
into Your infolding, gold-splintered eye.

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Theophany And Argument

Oh

Blessed be all dapper goats natty in Kentucky colonel string tie tufts,
growing party hats of horn in absolute bewilderment, who ricochet, look!
from barn walls.

Blessed.

Blessed be the jubilate of jump.

Blessed.

Blessed.

Blessed be the red, banker’s eye of pigs,
and raccoons, at nights, in cities,

kissing their faces in the ripe gleam of three, four Italian

tomatoes.

Blessed be fire
and dirt smell and root wonder
and the nectar-witted, blabbermouthed nonsense of negro-lipped tulips
that can be heard with one ear.
Blessed, blessed.

Blessed be the lunge-hearted, epiphanous urge of trout,

at night-break, to silver heavily from the pond’s upward eye.
Blessed be the eye.
Blessed be the sacred act of all looking.
And blessed be the cataracted stones, who do not look, never. Blessed be
the stones, sightless, inward, monasteried in pasture corner piles, elders,

ancient ones, celibate, blue, dreaming of good gold, who chant

one magical Om
mouth to mouth with my choirboy ovalled cells.
Blessed be being, big-bellied being, bird song jointed, grace-legged
being, goat leap pulsed, holy dancer, with its holy metabolism
of storm, holy dancer, jitterbugging on the erect vowel, the I of stem, spine,
seam,

the phallic vowel of its triumphant self-announcement.

Blessed. Blessed be being and its hieratic law of more, its muscling out,

phlox’s purple desire muscling out,

and blessed be the eye-meet, crammed into sight look

The Poetry of Tim Lilburn /

3

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of squirrels connoisseuring threat.
Blessed be.

Blessed be.

Blessed be the eureka and the hick hurrah

And, necessarily, the discrimination.
Not star or fisheye, or fire, but consubstantial
with each glittering instance
my agape imagination
is the intelligent tip of cosmopolitan light, the pan-flicker;
is the astonished point, light’s sublimity,

burning in my head,

aquiver, an awe that leaps ear to ear,
the slow, interior, Mona Lisa smile the universe ends in.

With sammadied molecules, with personed light,

with the spirit spurted muscles

of heart pounding life that bolts, I am Siamese-unioned,
well, at mind,
consanguine, a complementary fiction.

Let King Entropy stroke suburban temples with fingertips of weary.
Let the best in business suits walk blank from horror’s sermons
mink-eager to knock up emotion and husband it again as decision
until the body winces with a moral astigmatism
before S.O.S.’s cue-carded in the given. I hear the vow-psalm
of gravity intoned by fraternal stones in the motherhouse of mud,
beneath stopped feet at intersections and beneath streets of distraction,
and am te deumed real, hallowed in the hesed of my heft, loved
into hereness by the nuclear hug, bodied proud in the hilarious spin.

4 / Desire Never Leaves

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Pumpkins

Oompah Oompah Oompah, fattening
on the stem, tuba girthed, puffing like perorating parliamentarians,
Boompa

Boompah

Booompah,

earth hogs slurping swill from the sun,
jowls burp fat with photons, bigger, bigger, garden elephants,
mirthed like St. Francis, dancing (thud), dancing (thud,
brümpht, thud, brümpht) with the Buddha-bellied sun,
dolphin sweet, theatrical as suburban
children, yahooing a yellow
which wallops air. Pure. They are Socratically
ugly, God’s jokes. O jongleurs, O belly laughs
quaking the matted patch, O my blimpish Prussian
generals, O garden sausages, golden zeppelins. How do? How do? How do?

Doo dee doo dee doooo.
What a rabble, some explode,
or sing, in the panic of September
sun, idiot praise for the sun that burns like a grand hotel,
for the sun, monstrous pulp in a groaning rind, flame seeded.
Popeyes, my dears, muscular fruit,
apoplexies of grunted energy flexed from the forearm vine,
self-hefted on the hill and shot
putted in the half-acre.

Carro-carroo.

Are you well,

my sweets, pleasure things, my baubles, my Poohs,
well?
I, weeding farmer, I, Caruso
them at dawn crow in the sun
cymballing mornings
and they Brunhilde back, foghorns, bloated alto notes
baroquely happy.
Not hoe teeth, not Rhotenone, but love,
bruited, busied, blessed these being-ward, barn-big,
bibulous on light, rampantly stolid

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as Plato’s Ideas, Easter Island
flesh lumps of meaning, rolling heads
in my 6-year-old nightmares,
vegetables on a ball and chain, sun anvils
booming with blows of temperature.

Come, phenomena, gourds of light, teach
your joy esperanto, your intense Archimedean aha
of yellow to me, dung-booted serf, whose unhoed brain,
the garden’s brightest fruit, ones
communion with the cowfaced cauliflowers,
cucumbers twinkling like toes, and you,
clown prince,
sun dauphin of the rioting plot.

6 / Desire Never Leaves

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1. Fervourino To A Barn of Milking Doe Goats Early

Easter Morning

Maa¯pe, maa¯pe, maa¯pe, hust, hust, boobies, dears,
I want to speak to you.

I will turkey Gospel to you

as John Diefenbaker spoke French.

Glitter unto me on your pert, bone-seamed, Rockette legs,
Blue udders whopping knee scoops, snappy

at the starlet canter of Flesh in a breathless, wartime dress.

Our text: Ubi caritas et amor.
Which is that today the Lord High Being of Milk squirted
Life-like from the squeeze of his will. Pseudo-reindeer, attend.

And I say to you
Look at the light on the blond wheat straw.
Energeiai of the Godhead, first seen by Simeon the New Theologian,

1000 ad,

Mt. Athos, now here, cherub bum bright, curves warm from

bedding.

To what shall the Kingdom of Heaven be compared?
I say it shall be like the femininity of long grass
Where the New Idea spreader
Arced greenly yesterday’s scrapings of the barn floor, vague,
Nevertheless, as the violet of the buck’s penis.
And still it shall be like the goat that’s stolen the poem
From under the herdsman’s pencil, up, suddenly, on the jokes
Of its Pan legs, poem in its pink teeth, then, ears back, off

like a Mozart flute.

Think of the bucks.
Koranic dogmatists, mystically dense as fashion models,
Who clench their bodies in memory always,

blinking at the flesh exclamatory donging their knees,

naming God.

They neither labour nor spin
Yet the Yahweh of Armies jolts them tall with fresh male dreams
While inches of assent bud yearly to their taffied, yellow horns.

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Petites, consider not the world.
There the lust-a-rama of the shopping malls humiliates eros,

then naps apodictically, Amen.

Listen, I go now to the kid barn
To preach there to the applause of their lips
Five streams of milk
From the black nippled lamb bar.

And there wads of their coats shall stand up as Dostoevsky at insight
And their ears fall back as a long woman fainting into love,
And they shall know me there, I
Who tickle hail to their beating skunk tails,
As mother,
Which, Isaiah 62: 4–5,
I am, God’s wife.

8 / Desire Never Leaves

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Call To Worship In A Mass For The Life Of The World

Come you with desire and you without desire

and you royal-sleek with the aplomb of the doctor-loved mad.

Come you who violently wait.
Come you brow bejeweled with the cranial ache to eat

—bright, mental food —the world.

You sowing in tears, come.

Come you sleepless ones who hear in the clank-tappa-clang of unstable

titanium heads

banging walls of silos in wind-boisterous Dakota

spirit-rappings of your own garrulous deaths, come; come now.

Come all who are infatuated.
Come you who are Hamlet-spooked.
Let the jails empty
And let come diddlers, two-years-less-a-day sniffers

with drooling sleeves.

Come fathers whose shame hands have burnt on breasts of Oh-eyed

daughters

in houses mortgaged at twenty per cent.

Come. Let the electric locks release.

Come you dangerous ones who have seen all that is solid melt into air
Into the hearing of these extravagant promises.
Come from the doughnut stands, the Trail’s End Taverns.
Come you Vespuccis of the Americas of the eye.
Come, come now here to the peacelands and their white peninsulas

which are hands raised, pax.

You seldom Nathaniels with leaping tongues, come.
The night eats towards us, its boot full of blood.
Dead Alden, poet, come, come from the night, the dead cough of your

laugh gruffing

as the large-animal-feeding sound of sea gnawing rock, your face of smoke,

your head blurred with Player’s Fine Cut’s broken gold rings, come.

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Brother William, painter, ex-crazy Ukrainian, come, arrive shy, robed, with

birds.

Come women with scars.
Come mumblers after quarters, with your newspaper shoe shuffles

from the high-heeled, well-healed, Dior-cheekboned streets.

Come from the Thrift Villa, Mister Donuts, sanatoria, buckets.
Come children from the video parlour, your hands agog

with the miracle of deke and thrust that outwhizzed the machine.

Come you who believe the golden M of the blood meat bar

is all that remains of metaphysics, gold standing ruin of M, and that what

lies behind the gold slag is nothing,

night-nothing, alive simply in its anarchically pure impulse

of its hate of you,

just night, glued one by the gore of insects exploded

on the flashing windshields of the traffic.

Come, turn and come; bolt from the loveless cars idling in the street,

doggying wearying tails of smoke.

Come you with child and you without child
And you whose children are your own nursed selves.
Come into the held breath of the mute God, who,

seeing you, covers his face in awe.

10 / Desire Never Leaves

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Elohim Mocks His Images For The Life Of The World

Do not cling to me. I hate your sacrifices, despise your festivals.
I turn embarrassed from your Helen Steiner Rice looks fattening

upon the ice cream scoop curves of holy art.

Pull down the Mediterranean pietas erotic to the sweet toothed sense.
Do not “like” me. I will not take your pain away.

Upwrap the beautiful mind bound white and young
for the arousal of the power fathers as it grows slender to the bone.

Unwrap the beautiful mind.

Retrieve all amputations.
Repent with erotic shouts thought of me, cloudland’s geriatric,
his cranky beard and the body of a farm boy or narcissist that ripples

to the tip of a nixing fascist digit, more musclebound

than a mushroom cloud.

Forget, too, the lamb-y, metaphor-male, the groinless, bourgeois Jesus,
with his Easter-egg, candy-store-window eyes
ogling the cruciform crosspiece of his eyebrows.
If you meet such a Christ on the way,
kill him.
Do you wish to love? Do you wish to love?
Leave love. Love nothing.
Life is dark; life is dark at the no-place
of the shocked heart cut two by the bone-handled, thrice-bladed Word.

Life

at the breakpoint between spirit and soul is dark.
It is the unseen continent, past the Europe-edge of like
that announces itself a hundred leagues out with the smell of cedars
and with giant floating beds of trillium and ragweed. It
is the vast green fragrance of nothing, meek darkness,
that maps itself in mind by the cry of imaginary animals
mating inland.

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Unloop the crucifix from the neck; let the neck be a naked neck.
Eschew the new Plato-man tucking his shirt in with a stick.
Forget the ear-to-ear mmmmmm hmmmm,
the dream of total health, the dream of permanence.

Lover, meet me between the joint and the marrow.

12 / Desire Never Leaves

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I Bow To It

Earth, earth, earth, stone lobed, blue, earnest,

blundering Godward with lummoxing barn fever, the dead’s reliquary,

the dead

bunched as flowers in its arms, the stone-sung-to
dead, the lovely, horse-sensed,
devout earth, jewelleried with the dead, earth,
earth, dog-adored, wise and ambitious sleep, anti-fire, intelligenced

with diva-fat, cadenced purpley as the long Book of Isaiah, the slow

exhalation of itself, earth, wasp-pasture, dragging a shadow

of water, singing trampoline of winds, moving, bee-brocaded bosom

first, bright in the dark ray of its tonnage, bright in the dark

ray of its tonnage, potato-ganglioned,

bright-dark, unfolding.

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Spirit Of Agriculture, 1986

for Louisa

1

Barn light

great as gold room-sky at the Council of Trent
at the definition of papal infallibility, joy’s fist-like body, then,
raised over the elegant periti like a stadium shout at a touchdown,

light

pleased as a rich man’s belly, gold heat
summery and wavy over the mirage lines of argument, tongue’s bright

shadow, what

of the cardinal’s eminence the muddy eye cannot hold, morning light
in the towering barn, now,

when the forearms of the farm are sleeping, this light

the goats wear as the more public part of their bodies,
as we wear fierce manes of feeling, monstrances of what might be
fanatically bright hair when moved.

2

And the barn suddenly like a circus family
climbs up unto itself, web

to twine-loop, beam

to web, hay hook

Everested to nail, loin chandelier of the one lonesome buck waving like

one hand

free, weightless
Leibnitzean worlds of self-hurrah, architectures
of it-couldn’t-be-any-other-way, apt as a high ear of violins,
as gulls mount the cross valley hill like a god’s thought climbing a girl’s

thigh.

14 / Desire Never Leaves

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3

You who are about to be hysterical, look
at the stone
that looks back at you like your father.

4

The farms are dying.
The farms scuff in their nervous straw, throwing links of their machinery,

laneways

fluting, meaty, vegetable ears
fanning with terrified stupidity,
half men, one and half men, shocked by the dark ray of their deaths.
Pale land of sleep.
There is a rumour among the farms
there is a place in the West
they must go to die,
where all the Indians have gone, land of dreaming,
the bone gone dreaming in a grease swamp, go
lie down, laneway love-holding lane end in going,
the grave-hair-faced farmers asleep in the howdahs of tractors
on their backs, and in the mornings
before milking, I have seen them moving
to that place like hills
moving.

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5

Light like a gold ear, like the plaque angels hold over the right shoulders of

the dead

in old prints, light, the pectoral of a Mediterranean boy stretched in

the pull-back

of bow arm, the point
in Music for the Royal Fireworks where the expert kettle drummer starts

to sway

in an electrocuted wave, striking the skin over and over crossed wrists,

weeping,

animus roaring, maybe

tapping the rim with his forehead like a sped-up ether bird,

propellering his mallets, and the violinist walks back and forth
on his instrument like a man who’s lost car keys, the king confused and
about to rise, light like that or the mouth-shape

of someone saying “yes,”

light that is where the word goes that slips the tongue

and waits, the light.

6

Now the land turns in its chemical sleep, corn
floating on lakes of nitrogen, and the almost-awake banker dreams in
town of a sistine, jet-fuel-bright sky, money’s salmon run
up the head office cloud shaft of a Toronto ziggurat,
an Islamic heaven
where women flicker like trout in the dark
pool of the chief executive’s eye.

He sharks out in the gliding skin of his sleep

skin sidepanelled with 30,000 feet’s victory-bright aluminium, his eye

jumping ahead of him like an ecstatic’s unconsciousness

red red red.

He cleans the highway of farms hit crossing in the night.
Ingenious hunger making him everywhere, kill-thing, his will-to-power
mouth loosewide in the meathead leer of a Wagner opera.

16 / Desire Never Leaves

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7

You who are about to be giddy, Spiritus Vertiginous, look
at your hand, the palm, its wise face, the place
in you the sun rests, breathing
soft hub the hawk feels as the center hold of its wheel turn.

Raise it. It is the tablet of writing powers and thrones hold over the

right shoulders of the dead.

Look: the one you hold is gathering words. Filling with light.

8

Dawn.
One goat leaps to a place in the air near the manure pile
as if an angel rushed through the room
of her brain and flung on a light and the goat flew
up, fleshless, into it, the light the colour of its corn-tan eye, instantly
gone seconds
until the spirit-line earth
wills into the goat, into the eye of the goat from the shadowed love eye of

the stone

grew taut and sprung
her back.

She looks back with all
the forsythia, Handel trumpet goldness
of her queer eye out of her Kilroy-was-here face

at the air her non-body was.

Huh.

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In The Hills, Watching

Among the nerved grass, thrones,
dominions of grass, in chokecherry dewlapped hills,
hills buffalo-shouldered with shag of pulsed heat, meek hills,
sandhills of rose-hip and aster, in the philanthropic silence
fluxed by the grass, hounded, nervous with its own unaccountability, grass
the frail piston of all,
in hill heat, lying down in the nearness of deer.
All knowing darkens as it builds.
The grass is a mirror that clouds as the bright look goes in.
You stay in the night, you squat in the hills in the cave of night. Wait.
Above, luminous rubble, torn webs of radio signals.
Below, stone scrapers, neck bone of a deer, salt beds.
The world is ending.

18 / Desire Never Leaves

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Contemplation Is Mourning

You lie down in the deer’s bed.
It is bright with the undersides of grass revealed by her weight during the
length of her sleep. No one comes here; grass hums
because the body’s touched it. Aspen leaves below you sour like horses
after a run. There are snowberries, fescue.
This is the edge of the known world and the beginning of philosophy.

Looking takes you so far on a leash of delight, then removes it and says
the price of admission to further is your name. Either the desert

and winter

of what the deer is in herself or a palace life disturbed by itches and

sounds

felt through the gigantic walls. Choose.

Light comes through pale trees as mind sometimes kisses the body.
The hills are the bones of hills.

The deer cannot be known. She is the Atlantic, she is Egypt, she is
the night where her names go missing, to walk into her oddness is

to feel severed, sick, darkened, ashamed.

Her body is a border crossing, a wall and a perfume and past this
she is infinite. And it is terrible to enter this.

You lie down in the deer’s bed, in the green martyrion, the place where
language buries itself, waiting place, weem.
You will wait. You will lean into the darkness of her absent
body. You will be shaved and narrowed by the barren strangeness of the
deer, the wastes of her oddness. Snow is coming. Light is cool,
nearly drinkable; from grass protrudes the hard, lost
smell of last year’s melted snow.

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How To Be Here?

i

Desire never leaves.

Looking at wolf willow bloom,
streaming through plushlands of scent toward the feeling

of its yellow,

self breaks up, flaring in stratosphere.
Looking undermines us.
The world and its shining can’t hold our evaporating weight.
The world or what is there goes away
as we enter it, goes into halls of grass where torches of

darkness burn at noon.

Goes into light’s lowest mind.
Leaving us, woo-floated from planet-like names and not quite
in things’ shimmering gravity, alone in wide June air.
All-thumbs intensity that feels like virtue or music.

The Form quivers in the deer.
She doesn’t see me; I’m lying barely above grass on a plank between fallen

poplars.

Hot day, slow wind; I lift on the cam of rhizomes.
The light behind her light is a shell she’s just now born out of.
The Form is the doe’s ease within herself.
I came from there.
If you dug with small tools into radiant belts round her shoulders
you’d come to a first settlement of the soul, stroke pottery bits, put

your tongue on old cinders and remember.

Tears will take you part of the way back but no further.

20 / Desire Never Leaves

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ii

You wake, say, inside a large mosquito net,
you’re away from yourself, older, near a desert perhaps,
air cool, dry, cloud of small sand, everything seems far
away, North African, night ancient, hard to read, you
look through the flap and see something bent toward a fire,
sparks low round it, stocky, sitting on its man-calves, force, tiptoed.
It is desire.
Yes, adding stick after stick, it seems,
managing in its naked hands
the reins of occurrence,
charioteering the will-horses of night.

You want to walk in the dark garden of the eye of the deer looking at you.
Want a male goldfinch to gallop you into the heart

of the distance which is the oddness of other things.

All would be well.
Desire never leaves.
Mercury’s flower, a ghost-hurtling.
A mirror held before the spiritual wind
that blows from behind things,
bodying them out, filling them with the shapes and loves
of themselves.
You want that
and all else that shows in the bright surface polished by the lunge and

prowling of your desire.

You don’t know what you are doing.

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iii

Desire tells me to sit in a tree.
I live alone, mentally clothed in the skins of wild things.
Desire sways ascent into me.
I look, I look: bull-necked hill, blue sweetgrass in hollows.
Knowing is a bowing, a covering of your face, before the world.
The tree’s white tallness praises through me.
What receives the bow?
I am seduced by the shapeliness

of the failure of knowledge.

My name in religion is the anonymity of grass.
I practise dying.
Each day, the tutor, old man, eros, repeats the lesson,

I wrinkle my brow, my tongue protrudes.

Outside the window one chokecherry in the bush,
in a thicket of gooseberries,
adds a weight and compression of darkness under the sun

that is perfect.

22 / Desire Never Leaves

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Restoration

I want to be the knowledge that is one sleep in the sunward shoulder
muscle of the two-year-old doe coming out of hills and

down to Moon Lake.

I will get there by seeing.
The whole body and virtue will rise up and form the look.
Seeing is the extreme courtesy that comes when desire is broken.
Desire will be broken and will continue with a bright limp.
We will move toward high bush cranberry and the smell of water.
I will be attentive, an oblique crescent near her spine, touched
by the light of her liquids. We will be going to Moon Lake,

the diamond willows,

old oxbow lake, reeds round it, the true river a ruin of water
in dust further on, the red century ending.
I will see my way into that place and into that body.
This will come only after I’ve been sitting in the long grass
eating loaves of shadow pressed up through the ground.
I will have been dreaming there of one day opening milky eyes and finding
myself sick, inside her body, high up, near the spine, poor, relieved.
Sometimes it happens: you lose everything
and wake in the strange room of what you want.

Except I won’t be awake but asleep and full of gnosis.
In my ears, gold pulse of her footsteps.
We will go down the hill and enter the shadows of frost-burnt roses
and the shade of the smell of water in which reeds and elms are rotting,
October sunlight the shore of a country a small boat is just now pulling

away from.

I will smell her, light of one locked room in the mansion.
I will be in the muscle, a painting on the cave wall of her flesh.
I crane into the deer.
I am in the bright-dark cloud of knowing her

and could walk for days.

She is at the top of the hill and starting down

in early evening.

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Pitch

Lay it down, the shimmering glass.
The hooded flickering of the flat is for you, the

hooded flame of the hole.

Way out there, don’t tell.
You can see winter’s limp and unshavedness

moving on the hills; it doesn’t

know where to put its body.

Dark shifts of cranes in the valley.
Be quiet. Move up along the coyote edge, come up

along the left-hand bank to the best geese place

near the Métis winter camp graves.

Experienced light cruises the clay banks.
You must be this without knowing you are.
The river gleaming with falling down,

gold scar of current on its back.

Sandhill cranes on the dock scruffed islands.
A bigger dark comes in from a farther place.

24 / Desire Never Leaves

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There Is No Presence

There are geese over the water, flickering in bad light, something pushing

through

from the other side; here is desire,
a light around the tongue, world next
to the world, a garden that would appear if the word were found.
What glitters in things is a mountain, it can’t be held in the

mouth.

The heavy grasses; night bends from the waist and

goes down into them.

The last light is the intelligence, the smallness of
birds in wild berries.
The stars clank up, black-wet weight running

on the oil of anticipation.

The geese participate in the boiling dark and they
are a speech of it.

The water is a thicket
and a strangeness,
the smoke of the river, the scabbed back.
The ray of the river doesn’t bend into your face,

it’s full of the meat of its smell and heaviness.

Tree —a crackling huff of old light.
The water is a thicket of motion and soon
the wheat will be wounded in the fields,

it goes straight to compunction.

Sleep is everywhere, early spring,

things slumped in holes, calm, thinned, snow becomes dust.

A seed of light is building fat and intense

in the ground.

Something not yet here will speak for us.

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Geese on the ice,

walking;

this is breathing and thinking.
This first lies down in the fields of eternity.
And comes here, hot in its throat, lost, empty.
I live in a hole, I can’t help it.
Late afternoon, old grain in wet fields,

winter-dusty stubble, geese hulking down into it.

You could read by the light of their floating down

and understand what you read.

The sun goes into cold pools out there and the
rotting smell of water hushes in
from the stiff fields while there is still
some light, way up and uninterested, in the southwest. In my high
ear, the quaver of the world.
It is the colour of barley water,

it rises and dips in a small way that is exhausted.

Everything is fallen, everything a soul,
dry stick fire, green water shouldering up among absent-minded,
heavy poplar. I’ve seen the river; the river is one sleep;

the forehead, tin-coloured, flexes with guessing. Everything

is lonely.

In stones, fox, water, violet light, the jounce,
floing at the end of memory, the climb
back up the black fall from thinking, up
the waterfall of rotting into bone, stink, hair, thigh wooing sunlight
in the streaming plummet through air that cooled as
mass blistered in it.
Slow river, coyote-coloured, blue with melting snow.
Dirt river slumping through sugary ice.
The dark lid of the mauve river is falling:

how little we have.

There is a female light in the branches.

26 / Desire Never Leaves

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The river is a hiddenness, mud-green tree smoking from first darkness you

could spread out the camp of your life in.

No limit: hold it in your mind and you are weeping.
A grip, a posture of bells.
Coyotes move in the stopped valley, fox through snow,

one lit judder of prints a plume lifted in the middle of the

animal’s life.

Later a husky moon, loose bone of a moon.
The world became the world when the light of adoration fell in it

and it could not stay aloft in invisibility.

Now the river is here, a hand the spirits move.

You are good but no blond disc for you in the grass, none, no bone
of light, no little palate or gland of stupid but shining
intelligibility, the pure bride, none, none for you, in the grass prong.
A glacier of night
shoved through the centre of things. Juniper hard with absence.
You are alone in the world: the flab of the river
is anarchic, the water is feathered with ignorance,
a dangerous mirror that makes your face darkness throwing its hair.

Almost black light heaves from buffalo leg bones, lichen, a ring

of stones.

There are geese on the river, walking

the ice shelf: the erotic world wants more room.

In the night season of winter, dark church with wind outside

it, a limp of water.

Twilight comes from the ground, unwrapped from a rag, all

this dominion has.

The river’s breath is a bright elm.
Further in the water, a deeper bark,

the lack of light so strong you cannot look at it.

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The river, head of grass in the chest,

wand-stalk,

and the bumble of the horned, chimneying head,
flicking, half sickness, part relief.

28 / Desire Never Leaves

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A Book Of Exhaustion

Early June;

behind the ears, rubble.

Now the wheat comes up to you on its shaking legs.
Now you move in the blurred fur of blue light in the large

ear which is the darkness of the garden.

Small ache of the new moon over ungerminated peas

uncovered in their trench.

Stars now over the garden, a glow like thinking smudging it, onions

first inches, thinking with a head-ducking, coppery thunder cat-slow

sewn into it over the beginning wheat.

You are in someone else’s clothes walking at a slant to the gold

momentum.

Thinness lets you walk through the trees.
A small purple strip has been hauled out and hit with ropes,

something has been lifted out.

The garden looks at you. Both you and it washed

in the blood of not being seen.

Don’t say you’ve heard this.
I’m in a limping house that’s breaking up,

floating on the star river. Mineral light

over the big-armed, turned-away ground.
The place just stands under the fat quaver of northern lights.
Pigweed closed in, wattle of morning bird song —ask it

to lead the country

and it’d tie a stone round its middle and jump into deep water.

In my hand, the clean and glittering
weapon of doing what the light eventually tells me.
Sunflowers, peas, wheat, spinach,
carrots are up.

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They are the dragon again, promising

obedience, eddying muscle of the other side;

they will live with us and living with us
means letting themselves be fleeced by the beam thrown
by the tightness of our hearts, means their eyes on
the hollow just below our throats, the blood-jump.

The long striding dirt kicks into
big, important felt boots and is gone
in a grainy, moth’s-back dusk
out past the waxy light of petunias,
war light, light with no mind
the river forgets up over the rise.
It goes into the mountains,
it tends sheep; what it eats is what
it breathes of the clotted dark of extreme distance.
Last summer I lived in the grove of her skin.
A bear’s ear of new potato appears on the ground.
The eyes of everything sharp and young on my hands

in the morning,

I walk in the garden and am admired.

Heavy fall of three-week
male wheat, a matinée forelock. It did this
by itself.
It looks up because it thinks this is beautiful, but can’t
see over the anvil forehead. It can’t sing.
Its body is an olive-gold cloth it doesn’t know what
to do with laid across its arms.
The flavour of the indifference of the bend of the iris
stem, the meal
of its carelessness —the small penis of light in

me stands on end and stays that way all day.

30 / Desire Never Leaves

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Everything thick-faced with green,

first stars a few crazy people round scrawny fires in the hills.

Late now, just a little light in a thicket where no one
comes, high, poisonous —the grass flattens its
mirrors and in the fresh dark in the tall
stalks there’s a room where everything can slowly open its eyes.

The Poetry of Tim Lilburn /

31

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Kill-Site

________________

The animal dreamed of me,
a brown gust separating above its head;
this was below snowhumps on the creek,
ice fog up the towers along
the valley sides, blood on the snow,
estrus marks, the water frozen a yard down.

When Henry Kelsey died or left
Hudson Bay, there’s a rumour he continued walking under the ground
in the highest part of his voice, down the west hip of the Porcupine Hills,
a pythagorean veer in his eyes.
Because all this was a new music, uncooked ratio, a machine of smoke.
And he thought

Let the will sleep here 400 years.

Let the will sleep here 400 years.
Only some song would turn the lock.
He was looking for the deeper Crees, the Poets, south people sleeping

along the rock ledges behind their eyes, someone to put something

in his mouth.

And because he was under the ground, everything came to him—he
saw a face of wheat, a face
of mineral beam, nipples of stones, a face
of winter in things, face of what is
at the back, the watery, the alto part of the mind,
showing through skin.
(It rose to the skin

for its hump to be seen, then moved back into the trees.)

Only a song would turn the lock.
He kept walking, wanting and fearing

the freezing of rivers.

32 / Desire Never Leaves

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________________

Sandhills in a light, likely daylong rain, looking off
to the left, grass that’s not going anywhere, September— everything walks
toward you; it undresses and comes

toward you with its small bright hands

and the downwind smell of your father’s mind
and his shoulders in the early summer of 1964;
he’s working two jobs, post office, moving company, right
now he’s not wearing a shirt, a hundred and forty-five pounds,
but still less under the name of his lower-in-the-throat citizenship,
where he’s not saying a thing, living in a cave two-
thirds up a cliff line, how
did he get there, swallows heaving in front of his face, the hole
trench-shovelled into clay sides lifting over the Milk River, north of
the Sweetgrass Hills, cattle clouding off infinitely
to the east, feathers
and bones hung from string at the mouth of the cave,
pale green feathers smooth out long and speechless from his tailbone.
Things climb out of the elms of their names and themselves
and they come forward, moving their tattooed, Fulani hands.
They smell of your father’s voice, his

one

black

suit.

The Poetry of Tim Lilburn /

33

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________________

Winter now; heavy twist and giving up of snow;
it slump-hulks in from west of the river out of a greenish,
balls-kicked cloud, then sleepwalks down the valley through the
muscle of four thousand cranes, the light of their red foreheads;
if it knew anything, it would be the deepest human voice,
or a little more, three or four throat-singings hanging from fishing wire
104 storeys down the invisible centre of it.
Its sweep and wound are the complete lack of choice.
Now the rilled flank: set this beside the corpus dionysiacum.
Gather me into your forgetting,
cloud the colour of the watch-face my father carried through
Italy, Holland, forty-three, forty-five. Gather me home
into the attention, the float and the visitations and
the bright room. You’ve seen the mountains
beyond their names
and been seen by them.

The animal that came to me was big with wounds, songful

with wounds’ clatter, with the clatter of wounds.

It wore a dark sound.
It moved into the back country of winter after it lay near my head.
It didn’t leave anything, no sachet, no cupped list of names.
Then it went into the bush country of winter.
I didn’t know what it wanted, it could hardly breathe.
I couldn’t breathe.
There was the breath-thunder of snowgeese flyways.
There was The Evidential Power of Beauty.
Nothing in the animal’s mouth, no neumes, no number chain of sounds,
nothing added to the general name of things that are and those
that are not.
Maybe it meant sleep in some buried clothes
in the hobo jungle by the river that went through Spokane, WA,
in the early eighties, Reagan just elected, a few of us reading

34 / Desire Never Leaves

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Marx in a small room, crawl back into that, maybe not. That river, then.
The animal smelled of unmixed space.

Sandbars, early November, light-quake on the front of my body.
Cranes

gone

almost

completely.

The Poetry of Tim Lilburn /

35

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________________

The animal dreamed of me.
It held a ball of light.

This had been embedded in its burnt-birch, split shoulder

but now was just above its head, shifting, gathering its sea legs.

November leaf smell in the light.

All that I had done had set up camp
under the ground,
a lame fire, chewed pot, a blanket smouldering.
Tonight Henry Kelsey would serve
creamed shoe leather and the green backs of stones.
Keep going.

36 / Desire Never Leaves

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________________

Dogwood leaves amnesiac, religious, turned to the wall;
crickets heavy-shouldered in the fall field that is growing inside the candle
in the tight, stone-lit church, lifted blue and rose from the ground, where
Bernard of Clairvaux is giving his third sermon on the Song of Songs —
the rubble-backed soul breaking off smokily from the moon of the Word,
the guttural rubble of knees and eyes cruising out from the Kiss, The Kiss,
the body tulipping-out, coughing and stumbling

crickets widening and drying the hammered, low field inside the candle
beside Bernard’s glasslike, horse-flanked mouth,
crickets widening, widening the field and deep day.
Bermard mentions the secrecy of the summer of 1964,
my father in a sleeveless t-shirt working for movers after the
6:00 to 3:00 shift at the post office, this is the stag on the hill, the beloved,
let him kiss me with the kiss of his mouth;
he’s looking up now and there are bird shadows slamming

across his cheek and throat, then later, in his seeing, a dark

sucking appears a little to his left, which is not the grave, but
a bunching and rucking of emptiness which he feels mostly under his

tongue,

where he appears to see it best, like memory.
This is the war.
Cranes on the river now, their calls small
charges in the upper arm.
Everything is here, everything is inside speech.

All blood is pooling.

The flats are voice-old,

one crumbling stroke on a sightless, bull violin. Olderwinter soon,

older

winter. Come quickly if you are coming.

The Poetry of Tim Lilburn /

37

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________________

The animal dreamed of me
—smoke of looking namelessly lifting —
below snowbanks on the creek,
ice fog up the towers along
the valley sides, blood on the snow,
estrus marks along the water frozen a yard down,
then the kill-site around the next bend.
But the animal moving, breathing,
who dreamed, let go on a wind of not-its-own thinking.

Henry Kelsey died or left
Hudson Bay, but then started walking under the ground
in the highest part of his voice, walking under
the ground, down the west shoulder of the Porcupine Hills,
a pythagorean shake and jump in his eyes.
All this was a new music, blindfolded ratio, a milk-bunting machine of

smoke, and he was just beginning to see how it bellied out.

And he thought

Let the will sleep here 400 years. Let it go down in

the grass.

Let the will sleep here 400 years.

Only some song would turn the lock.
He was looking for the deeper Crees, the sand-coloured, someone to put

something in his mouth.

And because he was under the ground, everything
entered from the top of his head —a face of wheat, a face
of mineral beam, nipples of stones, a face
of winter in things, a face of what is
at the back, the watery, the alto part of the mind,
showing through skin.
He could grunt this for a while, bone twisting on bone along

his spine-top, the things could crawl forward

in the body of a single eye, a little

eye.

Only a song would turn the lock. He was walking, wanting and fearing
the freezing of rivers.

38 / Desire Never Leaves

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There

I was in the ground and the animal came to me wearing signs.
It came out of the water moaning in stone, and it turned toward

me and this was speech.

The animal nitrogen-burnt with suns, moons, initial, beribboned

equations,

loose canvas, scenes painted on it, on its sides, hanging
from leather-laced poles along its spine,
the animal’s sides jewel-embedded,
its sides and neck quick with tongues.
The worm of the river was on my arm. Under my tongue, the river

tattoo, the thicket tattoo.

The animal’s large sides were assemblies rising in canyons to speak two

things, one from the cottonwoods, one from

the side shade of the canyon wall.

The animal came with the world.
The animal came with many people inside; inside it was a boat, carrying

many people over night water, a kind of creature.

Its sides were long walkings out onto the flats.
All I had there was grass.
I was lying down; the word of the river was under my arm, cupped

in my armpit and I was lying

down in blue grama grass.
The animal came with the self-polished things.
It could have worn old Spanish armour, it could have carried flags,

say the flag of St. George.

It had sides of catanyxis.
It carried a plaster mirror with gold letters on it.
It had sides of a no-speaking but a musical, half-weeping gravity.
It lay down near my head.
It uncurled its mind, nothing there, no smell.
It had a gold band round its head.
The animal came out of the west and you could hear it breaking through

trees, a little later, moving east in insistent dark.

The Poetry of Tim Lilburn /

39

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41

Afterword

Walking Out of Silence

I grew up in Regina in the fifties and sixties, the son of a postal worker and a
dress store clerk. My father had returned from the Second World War, where,
a sergeant assigned to a mounted gun (a kind of tank without a cover), he’d
seen action in Italy and Holland. He and my mother had met at a dance in the
summer of 1939, and exchanged letters each day for six years, but once home
my father slipped into a tight quiet, saying nothing to his wife, my brother or
me about what he’d seen in Europe. That silence, eerie, seductive —it was the
war itself —became the fifth member of our family, joining us in the late after-
noons between when my father got off work at 3:00 and 5:30 when my mother
returned, and at supper, which my father cooked with impatience and a spare
skill. His uniform hung in plastic in the basement through my childhood next
to my mother’s air force uniform with its corporal stripes.

My whole family didn’t have a great deal to say—a clipped Irish Protestant

reticence came from my father’s side, a rural taciturnity from my mother’s.
I had cousins on the farm who uttered little more than a paragraph a month.
Besides, we were working class: elaborate talk was an excess we couldn’t afford:
how to pay for rich revelation? We were denizens of a Western Canada where
literature had not yet appeared; speech was a simple tool meant to get the
potatoes passed. That a writer might come from Regina, or live there, was
ludicrous; culture happened elsewhere, further east, if not on the other side
of the Atlantic. There was, too, something authorized about our particular
muteness: we were quiet, in part, because we —dwellers in the hinterland,
labourers —were meant to be. Involved language about ourselves or what we
loved would have struck even us as presumptuous. We, the colonists, were
colonized, and had no words to express this. It still is strange to think of my-
self as a poet though there is nothing else I care to be. But perhaps it was just
as well we kept quiet: just off the boat from the old country, what could my
family have had to say about the new place? (This is more fairly asked of my
father’s side; my mother’s people, homesteaders, at least knew where the
berries were and what to do with them.)

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42 / Afterword

Poems are praise songs or a careful, lonely moan for the world: either way, it is
the world itself that lifts them forward. They are the speechlessness of things
ripening, pressing, into language. The poet contributes attention, permeabil-
ity, a courageous leisure in which transfixity may occur; the poet combs out
the lines until they come as close to shining as he can bring them. Yet another
sort of silence can be a room you inhabit, a room of waiting, a room which is
a sort of ear; writing is this availability, listening’s stripped place, in which the
hidden lives of things, pumpkins, poplar groves, might be transcribed; writing
is mostly this craning quiet.

People drawn to mystical prayer eventually come to mistrust word use and

discursive reason —neither power draws them close to what they seek. They’re
not obscurantists, but greedy, and their hybristic appetite has reduced them
to a “naked intent” toward God, as the anonymous author of the fourteenth-
century mystical classic The Cloud of Unknowing puts it, a plain longing re-
lieved of speech, thought, image: in this alacritous, headlong soundlessness,
they move asymptotically to a deeper language which ever resists the mouth.
Poetry does not want what this prayer wants, though there have been many
comtemplatives who have been poets (Gerard Manley Hopkins, John of the
Cross, Rumi, Wang Wei), but its emptiness resembles the emptiness of con-
templative prayer —erotic, without preconception, ready for anything, slowed
by the slight drag of discernment.

Below my father’s uniform, in its fog of plastic, was a blue steamer trunk con-
taining, among other things slowly disintegrating, a large slice of my parents’
wedding cake from the early fall of 1945. The feeling my mother and father
had for one another, romantic, grateful—he had survived some of the
heaviest fighting the Canadian army saw —was a piety of the home, one of
the few, not-particularly-useful things that was allowed to occupy the family
noosphere, a kind of luxury and relief from relentless practicality. Their mar-
riage had its upheavals, though. One of the most ferocious of these happened
when I was two or so, my brother just born. We were living on Alexandra
Street in north west Regina, at the edge of the city, across the road from the
CN line that carries freight into southern Saskatchewan and brought grain,
cattle and cream back. On both sides of the tracks were the “shelters,” single
room, uninsulated shacks where our neighbours lived, mostly veterans and
their wives and kids; they drew their water from a communal tap two doors
down from us at the end of the block; the “honeyman” emptied the pails in
the outdoor toilets once a week. We lived in one of the few permanent houses

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on the street, a one bedroom frame building, no plumbing, heated with coal;
my grandmother slept on the couch in the living room, while my parents,
my brother and I occupied the bedroom. Open prairie running down to
Wascana Creek lay behind our back lane; a mile west was the “white elephant”
of Benson School, a large, handsome brick building, then standing empty; the
city, it was thought, would never be big enough to need it.

My mother bought a set of encyclopedias for a hundred dollars from a

door to door salesman one afternoon. My father was enraged when he re-
turned from work —the expense staggered him; the act struck him as dizzy-
ingly frivolous. My mother protested she’d agreed to pay for the books herself
in installments; they were for the future of their children; she’d been able only
to go to grade eight —my brother and I would do better. And so on. None of
this slowed my father down, so my mother retreated to the outhouse, where
she spent the rest of the day, the door bolted, her mother-in-law standing out-
side trying to console. I still have the books, the whole of the family library,
full of the knowledge of the world as it seemed in 1949 —teletype, Truk
Islands, Harry Truman.

The sort of silence that can crush speech can be benign for a writer if he
pushes hard against it: privilege or nature do not put language in him; he
must look for it himself, and when he finds it, it will be a new land. Your
mouth can be utterly stopped, but that’s only if you let yourself be terrified.
If you’re only a little terrified, you’ll settle for mediocrity. There are dangers
everywhere, lots can occlude speech, but the homogenic utilitarianism of
North American suburban culture is the first among these dark powers : being
a poet in the face of this seems comically, elaborately inattentive, fool’s work ;
it could get you stroked off the roll. Because of the culture and class in which
I was raised, apologetic silence often seems my natural state. Big talk, long
talk, incantatory speech always for me edges toward criminality. So I’ve
thought if you’re going to speak at all, speak with all the magnificence you can
muster —steal big. At some point, I realized I was told only a small amount
that had real worth in school and that part of this learning, the transmission
of Europe’s Enlightenment riches, was meant to keep me in my place. I grew
to mistrust what I was told, and decided to figure things —philosophy, interi-
ority, poetry, religion —out for myself. I’ve subsequently attended a great deal
of school, but I’ve always thought of myself as an autodidact. If it doesn’t
defeat you, silence opens the door. Pythagoras tested candidates to his school
by subjecting them to five years of speechlessness: only after that could they
begin the study of the cosmos, its order, its beauty.

Afterword /

43

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St. Thomas Aquinas, following Aristotle, says that what makes something
what it is, and not something else, is its formal cause; a chair is a chair because
it “participates” in some universal essence of chairness. Form brings a thing
identity while distinguishing it from other realities ; it is the source of individ-
uation, as well as the cause of sameness among things of a particular sort.
John Duns Scotus, following Aquinas, disputed this account of individua-
tion —if formal cause alone marked one specific thing from another, it was
indistinguishable from others with an identical formal cause, and so unknow-
able as an individual even to an infinite Mind. Scotus proposed a quality
higher than Aristotelian form by which a thing was set apart from all others,
even those most like it —haecceitas or thisness. It is best to think of haecceitas
not as a trait which a particular chair or tree possesses, a ghostly antler of
me-ness, but the capacity of a thing, likely simply its plumage of variety,
to awaken awe in human beings. The look of startled surprise, the being-
arrested-by-this-particular-tree, is the tree’s final form, a quality it shares with
no other thing. Here is the human contribution to the symbiosis of being, our
version of bees’ involvement in pollination and forests’ absorption of carbon
dioxide. This looking, this looking hard, enacts thisness and so completes a
thing, while wedding the mind to the world. Haecceity: the concern of
contemplatives and poets, those on ocular patrol, and their central politics.

I returned to Saskatchewan in the summer of 1990 after a seventeen year
absence: I had entered the Jesuits in 1978, after having spent a couple of years
in Africa, and, following a two year novitiate in Guelph, studied philosophy
for another two years in Spokane, where in addition to completing an M.A.
on the neo-Thomist Bernard Lonergan, I’d cleaned rooms on skid row with a
couple of luminous women, getting to know a number of the men who lived
over the bars and pawnshops. I left the order in the late 1980s, spending the
next few years working as a herdsman on a goat dairy near Elora, Ontario, and
doing a little teaching. When my partner at the time was offered a job at the
University of Saskatchewan, I followed her to Saskatoon; we bought a house
and land south west of the city and settled in. I taught a couple of classes at
St. Peter’s College, a Benedictine school an hour and a half by car east.

I found it surprisingly strange living again in Saskatchewan for the first

couple of years: not only did I not feel rooted there, everything that European
settlement had erected in that place —churches, museums and so forth —

44 / Afterword

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seemed temporary, floating. None of it appeared to live from the heart of the
place; none of it seemed to know there was such a thing as a telluric heart.
Cree people were autochthonic, no doubt about this, but I certainly wasn’t,
nor, I felt, was any of the complex culture my people, with incredible effort,
had built as they settled the plains; and I didn’t know how I could develop this
trait of coming out of where I was, and so lose my sense of estrangement, nor
did I have any idea of who would teach me.

I suspected that there might be no healing of this feeling of rootlessness

because, as I thought about it, I saw it grew from what people like me, dis-
placed Europeans in North America, loved best: the Cartesian conviction of
our superiority to nature; our pact with utilitarianism; our heroic allegiance
to analytic reason; our refusal of idleness.

2 / How Can I Write Above The Clouds

How can I write my people’s testament

above the clouds?

They leave time behind
the way people leave overcoats at home.
They erect a citadal, tear it down to raise a

tent on its foundations

nostalgic for a glimpse of palm trees.

My people betray my people
in wars defending salt.
But Granada is gold,
silken words embroidered with almonds,
tears of silvery glitter on lute strings.

Granada is a law unto herself,
proudly becomes whatever she wishes,
yearns for anything
past or passing.

If a swallow’s wing brushes a woman’s breast in bed,
she screams “Granada is my body!”
If someone loses a gazelle in green meadows
he screams “Granada is my land. That is where I am from!
Sing so goldfinches can build
stairways to heaven from my ribs!

Afterword /

45

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Sing the chivalry of men meeting death

moon by moon in the beloved’s alleyway.

Sing garden birds stone by stone!
O how I love you, who
cut me down sinew by sinew
on the road to her hot night.
Sing, “No smells of freshly brewed coffee in the morning

after you’ve gone.

Sing my migration
from the cooing mourning doves on your knee
from the spirit’s nest
in the letters of your liquid name.

Granada belongs to song.
So sing!

Mahmoud Darwish,

“Eleven Planets in the Last Andalusian Sky”

It’s possible to feel homesick for a place where you’ve never lived. It’s also
possible to have a memory, a large, shaping one that pulls all desire, of a time
that never existed, a time of Andalusian residence. I assume the Palestinian
poet Mahmoud Darwish has never lived in Andalusia, that region at the
southern tip of Spain, Garcia Lorca country, from which Muslims were
expelled in the seventeenth century, depriving Europe of the glitter of Islamic
intelligence. Darwish’s yearning for that place and Granada, its capital, total,
formational, bears resemblance to my yearning for the plains and mountains
of Western Canada, insistent, fantastical. What the heart wants, wants back, is
a residence it remembers but never had: this remembered, tugging home place
lives in philosophy, too, where it has an old cosmological name: apokatastasis,
the restoration of all things. But my ache is also quite different than Darwish’s,
though it too is for hyperbolic union: it’s the ache of the victor tired of
gnawing on the spoils of the land he and his people have subjugated, but that
won’t come to any of his names for it, that refuses to fit to his hand or eye.
My people will come home to the place they’ve never chthonically lived in,
returning from the exile they themselves shaped, but I suspect this return will
take some time.

46 / Afterword

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Afterword /

47

There is the knowledge which is a gathering of facts and another which is true
subjectivity: if poetry has noetic ambition at all, it rests with the latter. You
can read a poem without scrambling after comprehension; to do this, you
must first defeat the sweet tooth for sense. You can read with erotic passivity,
allowing yourself to be theurgically sculpted by musical force. Here narrative
is less a muscle than music, than anaphora.

Though I concede the intentions of poetry and contemplation fork, poetry

still strikes me as a religious undertaking, whether it is written or read,
because it is an attempt to listen inside things, an attempt to “hear” the inter-
iority, the deeps, of crows and mountains of basaltic rock : as a result, it
constantly edges toward ekstasis, a bewildering, somewhat destabilizing, yet
vivifying exile from oneself. While most poets possess a substantial horde of
ego, the act they perform of homesteading in otherness proves altruistic : if
one of us travels into the cut off world of stones, rivers, then all of us do
through the sort of reading which is anagogy. This means that poetry insofar
as it is erotic, insofar as it is religious, following desire into things, listening in
things, is political: one enters the sole trustworthy politics through a deepened
subjectivity.

Ted Hughes describes the Tree of Life of the Kabbalists as a model of “the
nested hierarchies of the universe —in other words a means of organizing the
psyche by internalizing the knowable universe as a stairway to God.” Here’s an
ontological map that’s potent, aligning, for me. Take highway 219 south of
Saskatoon, past the turn offs to Cranberry Flats and Beaver Creek and into the
sandhills, then past the White Cap reserve and the Ruby Rosedale community
pasture; you’ll leave the trees before the junction with highway 15; turn right
toward Lake Diefenbaker; soon the outline of the Vermillion Hills will come
into view. In a few miles you’ll be in the berry and deer country around
Elbow, good paths, but they’re not for you today; you’re driving on down the
Qu’Appelle valley and up out of it, eagle terrain, then on your right you see
the cemetery at Central Butte. Just another turn and you will find yourself
between the tall green sides of Thunder Creek valley; stop the truck and begin
to walk east, along an abandoned rail line, following the flow of the creek.
Thunder Creek eventually will merge with the Moose Jaw River, which a little
later will empty into the Qu’Appelle, but that doesn’t concern you, because
you are going only as far as Kettlehut Marsh, where the creek pauses for a
while and pelicans nest. No one comes here, needless to say, though there is

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a farm on a knoll north east —they’ve pushed their old cars and machinery
over the valley lip; a poplar stand has caught much of the trash; the farm
house, of course, faces the road and town.

In 2002, we found saskatoons south of the marsh that were as big as

medium sized grapes, and this struck us as quite odd since there were no
berries anywhere else in that drought year. We picked three or four coolers
and left on the bushes eight times that much. It might be worth going back
there this year to see if the patch is bearing. The branches offered pretty well
nothing last year, but who knows what will be there this July.

Poems are a fidelity to what they themselves cannot say but that stipples

forth as world. Poems can’t take their eyes off the signs. Poems are the homage
of an alert leisure enacted before these things; poems are the world as deep
singing.

I suspect a conversation will take place at some point in Western Canada
between Crees and other tribes who have lifted themselves out of the wreck-
age of the last two hundred years and a small band of white people who have
gone down the steep stairs of their own tradition and brought out what is
truly worthy. One group will say these are our stories and the other will say
these are our songs, these, the paths our people took up the mountain. Both will
be listening, ready to bolt. The Crees and the others are talking among them-
selves now, building, and we, at the moment, have no one ready; there’s still
too much work to be done. I propose this talk take place in the grove of
poplars north of Vermillion, Alberta, heading to St. Paul, close to the big,
wooded hills where you turn west to St. Bride’s and Saddle Lake reserve. We’ll
see. If we could bring the dead —and I imagine they’ll be there somehow —
I’d bring George Grant, Simone Weil and my uncle Jack; I’d set a piece of cut
log on end for Evagrius to sit and another for Teresa of Avila. We’d settle down
and build a fire; Eriugena would turn up and we’d break out some food. Soon
there would be a stirring in the grass, the soft scratch of new poplar branches
along metal and we’d look up and there would be someone like old Joe
Cardinal or one of the Tootoosises sliding out from behind the wheel of his
half ton truck and coming toward us, eight or nine people behind him, their
faces dark because of the collapsing light.

Tim Lilburn

48 / Afterword

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Acknowledgements

From Names of God
Lantzville, BC: Oolichan, 1986

Names Of God (11–12)
Theophany And Argument (20–21)

From Tourist to Ecstasy
Toronto: Exile Editions, 1989

Fervourino To A Barn Of Milking Doe Goats Early Easter Morning (3–4)
Call To Worship In A Mass For The Life Of The World (22–23)
Elohim Mocks His Images For The Life Of The World (24)
I Bow To It (44)
Spirit Of Agriculture, 1986 (50–52)

From Moosewood Sandhills
Toronto: McClelland & Stewart, 1994

In The Hills, Watching (13)
Contemplation Is Mourning (15–16)
How To Be Here? (60–64)
Restoration (65–66)

From To the River
Toronto: McClelland & Stewart, 1999

Pitch (3)
There Is No Presence (11–17)
A Book Of Exhaustion (21–24)

From Kill-Site
Toronto: McClelland & Stewart, 2003

Kill-Site (7–15)
There (35–36)

49

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Books in the Laurier Poetry Series

Published by Wilfrid Laurier University Press

Di Brandt Speaking of Power : The Poetry of Di Brandt by Di Brandt, edited

by Tanis MacDonald, with an afterword by Di Brandt • 2006 •
xvi + 56 pp. • isbn-10: 0-88920-506-x; isbn-13: 978-0-88920-506-2

Lorna Crozier Before the First Word: The Poetry of Lorna Crozier by Lorna

Crozier, edited by Catharine Hunter with an afterword by Lorna
Crozier • 2005 • xviii + 62 pp. / isbn-10: 0-88920-489-6; isbn-13:
978-0-88920-489-8

Tim Lilburn Desire Never Leaves: The Poetry of Tim Lillburn by Tim Lilburn,

edited by Alison Calder with an afterword by Tim Lilburn • 2007
• xiv + 50 pp. • isbn-10: 0-88920-514-0; isbn-13: 978-0-88920-514-7

Don McKay Field Marks: The Poetry of Don McKay by Don McKay, edited

by Méira Cook with an afterword by Don McKay • 2006 • xxvi +
60 pp. • isbn-10: 0-88920-494-2; isbn-13: 978-0-88920-494-2

Al Purdy The More Easily Kept Illusions : The Poetry of Al Purdy by Al Purdy,

edited by Robert Budde, with an afterword by Russell Brown •
2006 • xvi + 82 pp. • isbn-10: 0-88920-490-x; isbn-13: 978-0-
88920-490-4


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