A Silent Voice from the Garden

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Name: A Silent Voice from the Garden

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Chapter 1 to 18

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Chapter: 1

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 1 – Blue Mondays

Bella

For some cosmically universal reason, Mondays always seemed to be the worst day of the work week. For those who worked an ‘average’ weekday job, that was a truth shared by the majority of us. But in my job, ’Blue Monday’ took on a whole new meaning.

As a case worker for Seattle’s Child Protective Services, I saw more than my share of blue, in the form of bruises and wounds on the most helpless and vulnerable of Seattle’s citizens. Although it was certainly not limited to Mondays, it just seemed like the weekend offered more opportunities for the depraved and out of control in my jurisdiction to unleash their wrath, making Mondays all the more hectic as we tried to catch up with the weekend overload.

Working as a child advocate hadn’t always been my dream job, but I kind of fell into it unknowingly at an early age. After watching a classmate die in my arms from a brain hemorrhage induced by a blow to her head by her stepfather at the ripe old age of nine, the ground was broken and the seeds planted in my heart to stand and fight for those who couldn’t fight for themselves, to speak for those who could make no sound. A silent voice from the garden, that when provoked, screams above the deceptively silent roar that drowns out their muffled cries and denies their bruises and broken hearts, calling for accountability. And now, just over fifteen years and a few choice catalysts later, I screamed for all I was worth, Blue Mondays be damned.

I arrived at my office and was just getting settled, juggling my briefcase, a stack of case files, and a bakery bag onto my desk when I heard one of my favorite morning sounds.

”Good morning, Bella,” a melodious little voice from two offices down sang and I smiled to myself. “Please tell me you remembered to bring the good coffee from the bakery this morning, else we’re going go to have to drink that canned stuff again.”

“Of course, my dear. Heaven forbid you should have to drink plain grocery store coffee.” I looked up to see a very bleary-eyed Alice Brandon arriving in my office doorway, looking like she had had a very late but worthwhile night, judging by the grin on her face. I recognized that grin and winked knowingly back at her, laughing as she stretched like a contented cat. If I didn’t know better, I would have sworn I could hear her purring.

Alice was our branch’s resident child psychologist, and my best friend. The children loved her, and she was able to get through to even the most traumatized and withdrawn children, making her an invaluable asset. I think some of her charm had to do with her size and personality. She was tiny, almost childlike herself, which helped her relate more readily with the children we served. Her uncanny ability to read children and connect to them emotionally made the rest of our jobs easier, most of the time.

She definitely had her moments of being a pain, though, like when she dragged me out of the office at lunchtime to satiate her appetite for ‘retail therapy’, as she mock-soberly called it. I called it an expensive form of torture, without the whips and chains, or the potential sexual gratification. However, her enthusiastic and bubbly personality invariably made me smile, even when I wanted to cry sometimes. Ok, often.

“Look at what the cat dragged in,” I teased sarcastically. “What time did you finally get home last night?” I already knew the answer.

“Who said I went home at all?” Alice grinned, yawning as she grabbed the bakery bag with the package of coffee beans and fresh croissants I had picked up on the way in. “May I…?” she asked having already dug into the bag, and I watched in awe as she started cramming huge pieces of croissant into her mouth.

“Of course. That’s really dainty by the way,” I pointed sarcastically at her already overstuffed mouth as she eagerly stuffed in another huge bite. How someone so tiny could fit so much in their mouth at once baffled me.

“Sorry, but I’m starving!” she muttered almost unintelligibly with her mouthful. “Must have been all that….”

I missed the rest of her fading comments, as she had scooted out of my office heading towards the break room to make coffee, still muttering through her full mouth. I didn’t have to hear her finish her sentence to know exactly where it was going. Alice often came in sporting a hefty case of post coital afterglow these days. Ever since she accidentally spilled her soup in the hospital cafeteria line on Dr. Jasper Whitlock’s new Mark Nasons, they’ve been inseparable.

Jazz, as she now fondly called him, came to work as a child psychiatrist for the Department shortly after she did, and Alice admired him from afar for months. She would come back to the office after having seen him around, always at a respectable distance, with stars in her eyes and almost floating. I often teased her about practically being a stalker, the way she always managed to be somewhere near him, yet just under his radar. We spent countless hours after work discussing our fantasy men and he was definitely her brand of…everything. Their first actual introduction wasn’t exactly ideal but it was certainly memorable. She basically doused the man in hot soup in a move that normally would have been one of my signature blunders, since I tended to be one of the clumsiest, most bumbling humans walking the face of the planet when flustered.

But that day, Alice, who was normally graceful and delicate, pulled a total Bella, as in grace-less. She had been so distracted again after having glimpsed Dr. Whitlock earlier in the corridors of the hospital that she wasn’t paying attention to the fact that he had slipped into the line directly behind her in the cafeteria on a lunch break after he had been on rounds at The Children’s Hospital of Seattle. When she heard his voice speaking to a colleague behind him, she spun around too fast, drenching him in hot tomato basil soup from his waist to the tips of his shoes.

From the stories I heard from some of the other cafeteria employees and staff, it was priceless to watch. He apparently was so stunned by her when their eyes met, he didn’t even realize for a few seconds that he was practically being scalded. They were only snapped out of their trance when Dr. Whitlock’s colleague shook his shoulder frantically asking him if he was burned.

In a flurry of napkins and towels provided by the amused counter staff, Alice knelt and started frantically wiping down the front of his white coat, pants legs and shoes as he stared down at her in a daze. When her hands rubbed down the section of his coat in front of his slacks, her eyes shot to his again as she realized what she had done. Apparently, he was as taken with her as she was with him.

His eyes were locked on hers, and he gently lifted her to her feet. Alice, who was never at a loss for words, was suddenly stammering incoherently. She finally composed herself enough to mutter something about getting his clothing cleaned at her expense. Since he obviously couldn’t finish his day in his current state, but lived too far away to run home and change, Alice convinced him to join her in a quick run to the mall just a few blocks from the hospital. Of course, it didn’t take much convincing, and they were off, leaving Dr. Whitlock’s colleague standing gape-mouthed in the cafeteria.

After that trip to the mall, they were rarely seen apart outside the Department. They found they had many common interests, and both of them being in the mental health field made for some interesting pillow talk, which I made Alice share with me, in as much detail as she would.

I rounded the corner of the break room to the smell of coffee being ground. Heaven must surely smell like this, I thought. “Hurry up, I’m going through caffeine withdrawals,” I ranted as Alice finished with the grinder and was shaking the coffee into the filter. “I need my fix. I don’t have a yummy man to get me started in the morning like you do,” I teased as I played with one of the spikes on her head of short black locks. She shot me an ‘if looks could kill’ glare, and launched into her usual tirade regarding my lack of concern for all things personally aesthetic.

“And whose fault is that, Miss ‘I Can’t Be Bothered’, huh?” Alice griped at me, pouring water into the coffee machine. “Between your lack of effort and your lack of a decent wardrobe, you could pass as the spokesperson for birth control, which is really sad because you’re so incredibly beautiful. Really, Bella, it’s all in the packaging!”

“I love you, too, Alice.” She just looked at me and shook her head, trying to hide her grin.

Alice had truly missed her calling in life. She really should have been a beauty consultant or a personal appearance advisor, if there was such a thing. She was always spot on in how she dressed, and she always turned heads everywhere we went. She had style on top of style, and fashionable was something she just redefined.

I, on the other hand, knew you couldn’t make a sow’s ear into a silk purse. I wore my long curly brown hair swirled up tightly into a French twist at the back of my head, and my deep brown eyes were hidden behind a pair of heavy black “professor” glasses. I dressed very conservatively and plainly, which drove Alice crazy. She accused me of being almost masculine, which didn’t bother me in the least. I knew I was all girl at heart. She was always dragging me shopping and trying to get me to buy clothes more befitting my twenty five year old body. She was convinced I was sexy under there somewhere, but I just couldn’t see what she was talking about. I regularly frustrated her, earning her infamous barb, “Bella, fashion is a state of mind, and you’re out of yours!”

I didn’t see the need for such personal embellishments. Who was going to see me anyway? When I did go out, the people I usually came in contact with had more pressing issues to think about than whether my designer label of choice was Gucci or Goodwill. My milky pale skin was a sad testament to the fact that I rarely did ever go out. I hardly ever saw the sun, not that you would see it much here in Seattle anyway. I had contacts I wore when we would go out occasionally for an event, but it was pointless to wear them when I had perfectly good glasses that didn’t have to be replaced ever few months. Wearing fancy clothes or makeup to work seemed like a waste of time to me. I was never one much for frills anyway, but the rigors of my job gave me reason not to bother, at least in my opinion.

Try as I might, I was often overcome by some of the cases I handled, and the situations and venues I had to enter were frequently difficult, if not unsavory. Sometimes emotions ran high, as well as nerves and tempers, resulting in tears and physical exhaustion. The awfulness and severity of some of the cases regularly brought me to tears behind my closed door once I returned to my office and things finally sank in. I’ve gone home and collapsed more times than I care to remember after a particularly draining day. There have also been many days when I felt weak and ineffective, but I was committed to do the best job I could, and so I did.

We weren’t supposed to get emotionally involved in our cases, but I couldn’t help it when I saw a battered or abused child so severely damaged they were catatonic, or had to remove a child from its mother’s arms to save their life or prevent further abuse. I wanted to fix them all, take them in and care for them, but I knew I couldn’t, and some days that was just too much. I loved my work, though, and couldn’t imagine doing anything else. I felt truly needed here, even if I didn’t have children of my own or a man in my life to make me feel that way at home.

Alice handed me a cup of coffee and I took a croissant and headed back to my office. The phone was ringing as I came back, and I sat my coffee down to get it. The voice on the other end of the line made me roll my eyes and smile.

“Bella, dear, have you been listening to the news this morning?” I couldn’t help but grin hearing my mom chatter rapidly in her lilting voice. Unnatural – surely I didn’t come from this woman.

I could hear my dad mumbling something in the background about “horrible tragedy” and “too damn perky” as he was leaving the room, most likely making his way down the hall toward the bathroom for his predictable morning meeting with the newspaper. Charlie was nothing if not predictable. I was much more like my dad than my mom; grounded, stoic, and sometimes stubborn to a fault. My mom tended to be somewhat hyper and totally random at times. She was younger than her years, which made her fun, except when I needed her to be my mom. Then she could be quite frustrating. Still, she was a great mom and we shared a bond a lot of mothers and daughters never knew. She was also extremely perceptive and could read me like a book, when she was paying attention.

“No, mom. I just got in. What’s up?” I asked, sure it was something to do with another dog show. My mom had a passion for animals, something else we shared, and her passion for black Pomeranians rivaled my own. “Did the Pomeranian get dissed again?”

“Oh, Bella, it’s unbelievable, and it’s happening right there so close to you! Turn on your radio or something. I’m sure it’s on the news by now!” she rattled quickly as she referred to the TV on her end. She was absolutely frantic now about whatever she was watching, talking in that voice I had come to recognize, which meant one thing. Children were involved in a dangerous situation. My other line started beeping, so I had to let her go.

“Mom, I have another call coming in, and it’s probably Rose. I’ll call you later. Love you, mom! Bye!” I clicked over and heard the sound of sirens and yelling in the background as I picked up my other line.

“Bella, it’s Rosalie, we’ve got a bad one this morning, girl!” Rosalie yelled over the noise and commotion in the background. Rosalie was our department field supervisor. She was first at the scene when CPS services were needed.

“Where are you?” I asked, sensing Blue Monday was upon us.

“I’m at the Newton foster home. Alert the team, then get Alice and meet me at Children’s in Emergency. This is one for the record books.”

I alerted the office and quickly collected everything I needed. Alice and I were set to go in a matter of minutes. Fortunately, we only had to go down the street three blocks to reach the Children’s Hospital. As we were leaving, we caught sight of the TV in the reception area where Angela, our administrative assistant, was glued to the screen.

“Alice, Bella, look at this!” Angela’s eyes were huge. A reporter was standing in front of a residence with emergency personnel scurrying in the background.

“…Neighbors were unaware of the situation going on in this house right behind me until shots were heard this morning followed by the screams of the children trapped inside, and then they noticed smoke from the fire that raged quickly…..”

“Oh, my God…,” Alice and I whispered simultaneously as paramedics were seen loading bandaged small bodies into waiting ambulances, while others, faces blurred for protection, were being carried or led from the charred house.

“…Authorities at the scene are reporting that a parent who had recently lost custody invaded the home last night and held the family and a number of foster children at gunpoint, including his own four…” the reporter continued.

Apparently, the intruder, identified as Tyler Jordon Crowley, was distraught that his children had been removed from his custody by CPS based on charges of alleged sexual molestation and neglect, and he had broken into the foster home and taken the family and their charges hostage. One of the older children managed to slip away when Crowley’s attention was diverted, calling for help early this morning from a cell phone before the captor caught her. He had flown into a rage and pistol whipped the girl, causing severe facial lacerations and cranial damage. When he realized the police were surrounding the house, he tried to burn it by setting the draperies on fire. A sharp shooter managed to pick him off as he was lighting the last drapes, but not before Crowley had shot the foster parents as they tried to protect the children. Some of the children were slightly injured in the chaos or had succumbed to smoke inhalation.

Alice and I arrived outside the hospital emergency area just as they were bringing in the first of the ambulances. We stood by silently as Rosalie identified the bodies of the dead foster parents before they were transported to Valley Memorial. Alice and I went inside the hospital with the first of the injured children as they were unloaded. While the doctors were evaluating their injuries we went to find Rose. She was talking to a tall, handsome police officer, looking very tired, but trying not to show it. He was well built and obviously took care of himself. The familiar look on her face made it plainly obvious to us that she was interested in him, even though she appeared totally focused and professional to the untrained observer. I only wished their first meeting had been under better circumstances.

“Rose, the doctors have started treating the injured kids now, so where else do you need us right now?” I asked as Alice and I entered the triage area.

“Over here. A few of the kids are mostly unhurt physically, but they haven’t said a word since they were brought out of the house.” She led us to a small room off the emergency hall where three small girls sat huddled together in the arms of their older sister, looking scared, dirty from smoke, and lost.

Alice approached the children slowly and knelt down in front of them. She introduced herself as “Dr. Alice” and started talking to them. The youngest couldn’t have been more than one, and the oldest looked to be about fifteen or sixteen.

After a while with Alice, the children seemed to come around, and the oldest introduced herself as Madelyn Crowley. She said the other three were her sisters and they had only been at the Newton’s home for a few days. Madelyn started crying when she confessed that the intruder had been her father, and the only reason they weren’t more injured was because he had locked them in the bathroom at the front of the house, and the fire hadn’t gotten to that part yet when help arrived.

“What happened to Stephenie?’ she asked, sobbing now. “Is she ok?” She went on to explain that Stephenie was the girl who had slipped out and called for help, incurring the wrath of Tyler Crowley for her efforts.

Rosalie came in with the handsome police officer, who introduced himself as Emmett Cullen. “Stephenie’s alive, but she’s really hurt right now,” Emmett told Madelyn. “The good news is they have a new doctor here that helps people with her kind of injuries to get better,” he explained. “He’s a really nice guy. I ought to know, he’s my best friend, too.” He smiled a reassuring smile at Madelyn, whose sobbing had settled to just sniffles. She got a strangely calm look on her face and turned to face Emmett, unblinking.

“Is my dad dead?” she asked as if she were asking about the weather. Emmett nodded his head affirmatively, waiting for her reaction. She gathered her three little sisters into her arms and looked blankly at Emmett.

“Good,” was all she said, and looked away.

Chapter: 2

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 2 – Paging Dr. Masen

Bella

I would like to have been able to say that Madelyn’s reaction to the news of her father’s death was a surprise to me, but I couldn’t. I had seen it too many times before in the faces of young victims as the news of their tormentor’s death brought them nothing but relief and release from the worry, from the pain, and from the fear of further abuse. For these four children it also meant permanent foster care, or adoption.

Their mother had been killed in a domestic violence incident by an ex-boyfriend just two days after the youngest, Dorianne, was born. She had run away from Tyler Crowley without ever reporting his abusiveness to authorities, only to meet her end with an even more violent boyfriend, who was now in prison awaiting trial for her murder. Her death put all four children back into the hands of Tyler Crowley until two weeks ago, when Madelyn finally came forward. She had been afraid of being separated from her sisters in foster care so stayed silent, but when Crowley moved on to Abigail, she came forward. According to the children’s records, Dorianne was eleven months old, Marisol was four, Abigail was ten, and Madelyn was almost sixteen. They had no other close relatives, and were now wards of the state.

Emmett and Rosalie talked quietly in the corner while Alice and I went over the necessary paperwork, trying to get the children settled as quickly as possible. It was our policy to try to keep children from the same family together, but it could be difficult if not impossible at times due to the lack of reliable foster families in the system. Those that were available were often filled to capacity, and children ended up being housed at the Center for extended periods until an opening came up. I was praying hard that we had someone available to take all four girls together and give them some stability from the hell that had already been their young lives.

Dorianne finally allowed me to hold her so Madelyn could tend to Marisol, trying to get her to lie down to take a much needed nap. Every time the child would start to sink into a deeper sleep, she would awake suddenly, screaming. Abigail just sat in the corner, eyes wide from the trauma she had experienced in the last twenty four hours. These children were going to need extensive therapy, and lots of TLC.

Dorianne and I seemed to bond on some level, and every time I tried to lay her down or pass her to Alice, she would cling fiercely to me and screech her protests at anyone who tried to remove her from my arms. In one of her tirades she managed to grab hold of the arm of my glasses in one tiny fist, popping the hinge apart at the temple with a jerk, while pulling my hair down with the other, taking several strands of hair painfully in her tiny fist.

Now slightly visually impaired, with masses of wild, curly long dark hair swirling around me, I looked down to realize that my light gray suit jacket was covered with huge smears of greasy soot from Dorianne’s feet and legs. Fortunately, I was wearing a fitted royal blue silk blouse with narrow straps underneath, and it was warm enough to remove the jacket, so I took it off and wrapped it around Dorianne. She finally fell asleep on my shoulder and I was able to lay her down while I tended to the others. The nurse came in to let us know they were about to move Stephenie to the O-R and if we wanted a chance to see her before she went under, we needed to come now.

“Alice, let’s go see her before they take her back. I want to tell her how proud I am of her and how brave she was for what she did to save the others. If she hadn’t risked herself to get to that phone, this could have turned out so much worse.” I was humbled by the bravery of this young girl, and had the overwhelming urge to hug her and let her know how many lives she actually saved, even if she possibly couldn’t hear me. In my mind, she was the definition of a true hero.

As we walked down the long corridors leading to the operating suites, I was seriously regretting wearing the almost backless blouse, tight black pencil skirt and high heels I had donned this morning. Definitely not a typical work outfit for me, and I felt somewhat awkward. Had I known it was going to be a long day on my feet, I would have grabbed my usual flats and pantsuit. I was sure I looked a mess with my hair down and swinging all over the place. Alice had been glancing sideways at me ever since we left the triage area, but it took me a few seconds to realize she had stopped walking and was staring curiously at me when I turned around to see why she had stopped. I recognized that gleam in her eyes, but I couldn’t follow my first instincts, because there was nowhere to run.

“Bella, you really should leave your hair down, you know. You look more your age, younger actually, than with that crazy granny bun you wear every day. It’s really sexier than trapping all that beautiful espresso silk back where no one can appreciate it.” Leave it to my favorite caffeine addict to incorporate a gourmet coffee into her description of my hair. She pulled a comb from her purse and quickly ran it through my haphazard locks as she continued to sing the praises of my unruly long mane of curls. I was blushing furiously while she tamed it somewhat into submission. I could only imagine what I must really look like. I knew Alice loved me, but I felt totally unkempt and out of sorts, despite her attempts to convince me otherwise. I was a creature of habit, and right now this virtual nun was feeling a little feral.

“Losing that blasted oversized thrift store jacket didn’t hurt anything, either, Bella. Don’t those places have a women’s aisle? Anyway, I see you’re wearing the outfit and heels I made you buy last week. It looks amazing on you!” I was getting dizzy watching her bounce circles around me in her excitement.

I had to admit, the outfit was a lot more daring than anything I normally would wear to work, especially the fitted deep scoop back blouse that didn’t allow for a bra. I hadn’t planned on removing my jacket, so I didn’t anticipate anyone actually seeing it. And I had never owned a skirt that didn’t fall at least half way down my calves. I couldn’t even remember the last time my knees saw the light of day. However, buying it was the only way to shut Alice up and get out of the store that day without a fight, and I knew if I didn’t wear it soon, she would pitch an even bigger fit. But why did I have to pick today?

She grinned smugly as she dragged me into the nearest ladies’ room and began circling me again to take in her canvas. She pulled her makeup bag from her purse to touch up my face as I scowled at her, muttering to herself how thankful she was for small favors that I had submitted to her latest form of torture to inflict on me: waxing. I let her have her way, except on the mascara. Raccoon eyes when I cried were not a good look for me. Satisfied with her efforts, we continued on quickly to the surgery suites. I just looked at her and shook my head, smiling with amusement. I must truly love her to let her keep doing this to me. Besides, she never gave up.

Alice and I entered the surgery staging area and were directed to a prep room behind the nurses’ station. We entered quietly as nurses worked around a bed on the tiny girl they were prepping for surgery. She was still awake, but groggy and in pain.

“Stephenie?” Alice laid her hand on the child’s arm as she tried to control her gasp. I moved to the other side of the bed, holding my breath to keep from sobbing at the sight before me.

“Who’s there? I can’t see anything,” she moaned, trying to reach out to us with her hands. Stephenie had suffered multiple head traumas at the hands of Tyler Crowley and her eyes were swollen shut. The nurses moved away for a moment so Alice and I could get closer to speak with her. Alice and I took her hands in ours as we started caressing her shoulders gently, both of us working hard to control our emotions.

“Stephenie, I’m Bella Swan, and that’s Alice Brandon on your other side. We’re from Child Protective Services. We just wanted to see you for a minute before the doctors came in. That was a very brave thing you did. Do you know that you saved the lives of several other children by calling for help? You’re a hero, sweetheart.” I was in tears now looking down on this beautiful, broken child. Blood stained tears started falling from the corners of her eyes.

“Did Madelyn make it out? She’s my best friend and she’s all I’ve got. I don’t want to live if she didn’t….” Stephenie started sobbing heavily, and Alice quickly assured her that Madelyn and her sisters all made it fine and were waiting for her when she got out of surgery. That news seemed to calm her somewhat, but another pained look came across her face as she struggled to speak. “How ugly am I now?” she asked Alice, squeezing her hand. “I was really ugly before, but now…” It was so hard to hear this beautiful child describe herself this way. Damn whoever made her feel like that about herself!

“Stephenie, honey, you’re not ugly at all,” Alice whispered softly to her. “You never were, baby girl! You’re beautiful, even with a few wicked boo boo’s! Besides, I hear this new doctor coming to take care of you is amazing. He’ll have you looking like a million bucks in no time at all. You’re sure to rival even the hottest girls at school once he’s done with you.”

“Do you think he could do something about my boobs, too?” she tried to giggle softly, attempting to lighten things up even through her pain. What a remarkable child, trying to comfort us when she’s the one hurting. This is so unfair,I thought.

“Well, that might have to wait until you’re a bit older. Give them some time; they might surprise you on their own.” Alice reached into her purse and pulled out her tube of lip gloss. “Here, let’s dab a bit of this on. Every girl feels a little prettier with pouty lips.” Alice smoothed a light coat of gloss onto the girl’s dry lips, bringing a half smile to her face.

“Thanks…” Stephenie trailed off as the anesthesia started to kick in. Alice and I looked at each other, tears on our cheeks. I knew there was a good reason for not wearing mascara to work. Alice desperately needed a mirror and some tissues to clean the black trails off her cheeks. She didn’t normally show the effects of these cases had on her, but today, I don’t think anyone could have looked on and not been affected.

Alice rubbed under her eyes and groaned at the mascara mess on her fingers as she came around the bed to stand next to me. She smiled ruefully at me as she looked back at Stephenie. “Looks like I’m getting soft in my old age. I guess I’m going to have to invest in some waterproof eye makeup for both of us.” I just smiled and nodded as I wrapped my arm around Alice. Welcome to my world.

As we moved to exit the room, the surgeons had begun filing in for a final look at Stephenie before she was taken to the O-R. I pressed my back against the wall firmly to allow them to enter but it was a tight squeeze, as they all seemed to be in a hurry to get into the tiny room at once. The last doctor to enter turned sideways to move past me, and when I looked up, I was standing toe to toe with the most amazing man I had ever seen. His beautiful green eyes met mine and I froze in place, as did he, directly in front of me, our chests practically touching. We stood there locked by our gaze, staring at each other like a pair of deer in headlights for several seconds, while the other doctors began examining and discussing Stephenie’s injuries.

“Dr. Masen? Dr. Masen!” one of the other surgeons called out. “Would you like to join us for this?” he asked, grinning sheepishly at the two of us as he finally got our attention. The other surgeons were looking at me like I had two heads. Weird.

“Oh, sorry, right.” He broke his stare away from mine and joined the other doctors beside Stephenie. As I turned to leave, I could feel him staring at my backside. Turning the corner, I glanced back, and sure enough, he was talking, but looking sideways at me, smiling.

Of course, none of this went unnoticed by Alice, who pounced on me as soon as we were out of earshot. “Oh, my God, Bella, that doctor was FABULOUSLY HOT! And did you see how he was looking at you?”

“Yeah, right, Alice. I’m sure the tear stains, ravaged hair, and red eyes were a real turn on for him,” I quipped sarcastically. “I’m sure he was staring at me like that because he’d never seen anything so ridiculous looking as I am right now,” I admitted sadly. I dared to glance sideways at Alice, and she looked like she was about to blow a gasket as she sprung in front of me, gesturing madly.

“You’ve got to be freaking kidding me! Bella, you look hotter right now than I’ve seen you look in...Forever!” she growled at me, the little sprite turning red with frustration. “When are you going to get it through that stubborn head of yours that you’re drop dead gorgeous? Any man would be lucky to have you on his arm!”

“I love you, too, Alice,” I muttered my favorite Alice defusing reply. I smiled and hugged my best friend and personal cheerleader, making her grin as well as we headed back to find Rosalie.

Alice and I walked back in comfortable silence, both of us deep in thought. After hearing how Stephenie talked about herself, it made me start thinking, trying to remember when it was that I became so down on myself. Growing up in Arizona, I was always on the outside of the ‘inner circle’ of tan, beautiful girls in designer clothes who always seemed to have boys draped at their feet. They made fun of me because of my pale skin and the thrift store clothes I wore. My parents were never rich, and even if they were, they were way too frugal in their ways to waste money on designer labels.

I never wanted to be like those girls anyway, but after years of hearing their hurtful jabs, and those same boys ignoring me and making fun of me as well, I suppose subconsciously I must have absorbed and retained some of their views of me. Perhaps that’s where I also learned the rest of the compassion I would need to do my job. Even though I was small, I fought fiercely when they picked on others or tried to pull painful pranks on the ‘victim of the day’. What I lacked in size, I made up for in determination. More often than not, my clumsiness actually helped in those fights, as I usually ended up on the floor with the bully under me, while their intended victim had a chance to escape. It was no wonder I ended up in this job, still fighting for the helpless.

Alice and I made our way back to the triage area to meet up with Rosalie and find out what else we needed to do. Emmett was still there, and they had been joined by another handsome couple. Rosalie motioned for us to join them.

“Bella Swan and Alice Brandon, I’d like you to meet Dr. Carlisle and Esme Cullen, Emmett’s parents.” As we shook hands, Rosalie explained to us that the Cullen’s had recently been accepted as foster parents and were going to be taking the Crowley girls into foster care, as well as Stephenie, when she was well enough to leave the hospital. Dr. Cullen was a pediatrician and Esme worked from home as an artist. They seemed genuinely glad to be able to help, and I said a silent word of thanks, as my prayers for the children had been answered once again.

“That’s wonderful! Let me have a chance to speak with Madelyn before you take them home.”

I walked back into the small room where the girls were and was immediately reached for by Dorianne, who clung to my neck with a death grip. Thankfully, someone had cleaned her up a bit, but my jacket was a lost cause. I would give Alice the pleasure of finding a trash can for it later. Madelyn was sitting quietly in the corner with Abigail, tenderly rubbing her back as she cradled her body in her lap. She looked so young and fragile, and yet so strong and maternal at the same time. I had to stop and compose myself for a moment to get the flow of emotions under control before I sat down next to her to hold Dorianne while we talked.

“Madelyn, I had a chance to speak with Stephenie very briefly before they took her to surgery. I won’t lie to you. Her wounds are pretty bad, but I think she’ll be alright with time and a chance to heal. We’ll make sure you’re able to see her as soon as possible, as I think that will be important for her to be able to recover fully,” I said as Madelyn leaned in and hugged me tightly, making Dorianne giggle.

“She really is beautiful, isn’t she,” Madelyn said as a statement.

“Yes, she is, all the more so because of her heart. You couldn’t have asked for a better friend.” Alice came into the room and slipped her arm around my waist, laying her head against my shoulder. “I know how important good friends are for our well being,” I beamed down at Alice. “I spoke with the Cullen’s outside. They seem like very sweet people, and I’m sure they’ll take very good care of you and your sisters,” I reassured her. I handed Dorianne back to Madelyn with a hug and a promise that they would be seeing me again very soon. Dorianne planted a huge wet kiss on my cheek before turning me loose, melting my heart.

This was going to be another one of those afternoons in my office with the door closed, I could already tell.

Edward

I knew it was going to be a rough day the second I put my first foot on the floor. I was sure I’d been dreaming that my cat, Sebastian, was coughing up a Brillo pad, but the pile of cold, slimy gunk under my foot told another tale.

“Gross!! Geez, Sebastian, can’t you do this in the bathroom or something!” I hissed at him as I hopped on one foot into the bathroom and swabbed at the gunk off of the bottom of my other foot with a tissue before collecting the rest of the offending pile for disposal.

Sebastian lay in his usual spot, totally oblivious to my tirade. He was flat on his back with all four paws in the air, basking in the warm rays of sunshine coming through the blinds that sprinkled bright spots of light across his enormous fuzzy red belly. His eyes were half closed and his head was cocked sideways as he watched me trying to clean up the ‘gift’ he’d left on the rug beside the bed during the night. He rolled lazily over onto his stomach and with a bit of effort, rose up and stretched, yawning so big most of his face disappeared behind his open mouth. Nothing made this cat move quickly except the sound of the can opener, or me biting into an apple. Crazy cat loved apples for some reason.

I made my way over to the small kitchen area, stopping to flip on the morning news before getting myself a bowl of cereal. I hadn’t had to buy any new furniture, except for my bed, so I splurged on the new plasma TV I hung on the wall over the generous dresser already in the room. I had yet to unpack the few things I brought back with me since moving back to Seattle after finishing my residency at John Hopkins Hospital in Maryland. I guess there was no need for much without a bigger place to put things. I had only been here a few weeks and had to hit the floor running, leaving little time for settling in. I had yet to even meet my neighbors or figure out where anything but the bare necessities and work was in the immediate area. Even though I grew up in Seattle, so much had changed since I left and I felt like I had to learn everything all over again.

My apartment was actually a self contained, converted mother-in-law efficiency with a private entrance, built on to the back of a huge old restored Victorian home. It was perfect for a bachelor like me; it had all the modern amenities I would need crammed quaintly into one tiny living space. I decided to move into this attached apartment as opposed to a conventional apartment building due to the hours I kept, and Sebastian. I wanted to buy a house eventually, but wanted a chance to get settled into my new position and find just the right place. The rent wasn’t bad, and according to the realtor that handled the lease paperwork, the owner was a really sweet young lady who recently inherited the property from her grandparents and only wanted it rented to someone deemed trustworthy and responsible. I would have to make a point of meeting her some day and thank her for the compliment.

Sebastian waddled into the kitchen and looked up at me, meowing for his morning can of kitty pate’. “Would monsieur care for the salmon or the ocean white fish this morning,” I asked in my best French accent. Sebastian sat down lazily and looked up at me annoyed, meowing for me to just put something on the damn floor and hurry up about it. “That’s what I thought,” I mumbled as I sat the plate down and watched as he curled his paws around the edges and pulled it to him, sniffing it appraisingly as if it were haute cuisine. At least that’s what you would think he was eating the way he plowed into it. Garfield has nothing on you, my tubby tabby friend.

I wasn’t really a cat person, but having a dog was more than I could handle right now with the hours I kept. I hated coming home to an empty apartment, though, so I went to the pound and found the friendliest cat I could that was next to be put down. After looking into those big, pleading eyes, I couldn’t leave without him. He wasn’t exactly a hot date every night, but he was pretty good company most of the time. I didn’t date much anyway, since I’d grown tired of gold diggers and shallow, petty women who only wanted money, status or someone who looked good next to them at the country club. I couldn’t even remember the last time I had dated, much less met someone who was real.

So, it was just me and Sebastian. We had an understanding. When I felt the need to pet something, he allowed it. In return, he could shed on anything he liked, and I provided a place for him besides the kill cages at the pound. Everybody was happy. Lonely, but happy. Yeah.

I had finished my cereal and was putting the bowl and spoon in the sink when a breaking newscast on the TV caught my attention. I turned the volume up to hear the reporter standing in front of a smoldering shell of a house tell of the horrors the occupants had endured during the night in a hostage situation. Children were involved. Great. Why do people even bother having these kids if they’re not going to be proper parents!

I rushed through a shower and was dressed and out the door as fast as I could move. From the description the reporter gave of the injuries sustained by one of the children, I was certain my surgical skills as a pediatric otolaryngologist were going to be called into service to repair the damage to this small soul’s face and head. Apparently, she had been beaten with the butt of a pistol and sustained extensive head trauma. I shuttered to think what I would find upon arrival to the hospital.

Craniofacial reconstruction was my specialty and since coming to work here at Seattle Children’s Hospital, I had been given the sobering task of reassembling the puzzles of more little heads and faces rearranged due to violence than I ever cared to know could exist in the few short weeks I was here. The brutality and inhumanity some people could inflict on the small and innocent often brought me to my knees with bitter tears and utter exhaustion, usually after hours of grueling surgery to piece them back together. Those nights I would have given anything for Sebastian to be a beautiful brunette with warm, loving arms to come home to.

I arrived in the emergency room shortly after they brought in the last victims of the hostage situation. The hospital had reached me on my cell phone to summon me in to treat the battery victim, as I expected. I noticed my best friend, Emmett, in a corner talking to a drop dead gorgeous blonde. Carlisle and Esme were there, too, looking excited, and a bit nervous.

The Cullen’s were like my own family. Emmett and I had been like twins when we were small. However, when we hit puberty, he shot past me in size and stature easily. He worked out a lot and was impressively built, and had a pair of dimples and a dazzling smile that got him more phone numbers than a telemarketer. Always the lady magnet, it didn’t surprise me to see him chatting up a gorgeous woman.

“Edward!” Esme sang out to me. “Come give me a hug!” I hurried over, happy to see them as always.

“I’m on my way back to examine the battered girl they brought in, so I only have a second. What brings you here?” I asked.

“Children,” Esme whispered, tears in her eyes. “Girls!”

Esme had desperately wanted more children after Emmett, especially a daughter, but could never conceive again. She managed to get by with just Emmett, but it was always obvious anywhere we went that she wanted a little girl by the way she would swoon over anything pink and look longingly at little girl things. She adored Emmett but missed having a daughter to share the female stuff with. Applying as foster parents was a stroke of brilliance, and it looked like she was finally getting her girls.

“We’re having a small get together soon, and it looks like Emmett may be bringing someone,” Esme beamed over at the striking blonde. “Won’t you join us for a while?” I quickly agreed to come, if I was free from work. I waved to Emmett and he grinned and winked at me, letting me know I would be hearing about this girl later.

I made my way through the corridors toward the O-R staging area to join a team of other doctors who would be working on the battery victim case with me. I caught up with the group just as they were entering the prep room to evaluate the patient and we all were attempting to squeeze into the crowded area. I had to turn sideways to allow a couple of visitors to leave and found myself face to face with the stunning brunette I had so often turned Sebastian into in my dreams. She looked up at me with the most beautiful brown eyes I had ever seen, tear stained and reddened from crying. Her long shimmering brown hair cascaded over her milky, delicate shoulders, and the blue blouse she wore accentuated the beauty of her skin and shape. I couldn’t pull my eyes away from her and was frozen in place. Those pools of molten chocolate were so expressive, I felt like I could see the weight of the world reflected there. I wanted to reach out and take her in my arms and hold her, promise her that whatever it was that was so heavy for her, I would help her carry it, regardless of what it was.

“Dr. Masen? Dr. Masen!” Dr. Cheney broke through my trance and brought me back to the moment. “Would you like to join us for this?” Smug fool. I was definitely going to hear about this later. The other doctors were looking at her like they had never seen a beautiful woman before. How odd. I had to fight the urge to reach out and caress her cheek as she looked at me one last time before I lost her.

“Oh, sorry, right.” I moved over to join the examination, but I couldn’t help but watch her as she gracefully turned and swayed out of the room. I’m sure the other woman with her took in the entire exchange, but I didn’t care. I would find out who she was, but now was not the time.

“Was that who I think it was?” Dr. Cheney muttered to Dr. Black, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

“I’m pretty sure it was, but I’ve never seen her look like that before!” Dr. Black whispered back. Their comments gave me hope. If they had seen her here before, that must mean she visited the hospital, at least occasionally. Yes!

We proceeded with the examination of the small girl, who was now sedated to help relieve her pain, and my heart caught in my throat as I looked at her swollen and mangled face. How could someone do such a thing! The child’s eyes were swollen completely shut, she had hideous contusions and lacerations all over her face and scalp, and according to the x-rays, her skull was fractured in two places. Her hair had been shaved to expose her wounds for surgery. Her cheekbone was obviously broken, as was her nose, and a large gash ran from her hairline down through her eyebrow. Whoever did this deserved to be shot. I would learn later that he indeed had been shot and killed, and although I was sworn to save lives, the loss of that one didn’t break my heart.

The nurses came back in after we exited the prep room to finish getting the child ready for surgery. Pressure was building inside the skull under the fractures, so the need to proceed was urgent. We all entered the scrub area and began the process of sterilization before surgery. As we were scrubbing, I was trying to mentally prepare myself as I always did before a difficult surgery, but Dr. Cheney and Dr. Black proved a distraction as they continued discussing the beautiful woman in the prep room.

“Are you sure it was her, man? I mean, honestly, ‘Ugly Swan’?” Dr. Black jeered in disbelief. “Who knew she could look like that! I may just have to rethink asking her out.”

“You’re such a dog, dude!” Dr. Cheney sneered at him. “You have most of the nurses in this hospital hot for you, and you’re still looking for new conquests. You’re unbelievable! Save some for the less fortunate amongst us, why don’t you!”

“Less fortunate my ass, man. You know you’re just as much in demand as me around here,” Dr. Black laughed loudly as they continued to banter. It was beginning to feel more like a high school locker room than a hospital scrub room as I looked between the two supposedly mature doctors next to me.

Dr. Jacob Black was a pediatric plastic surgeon of American Indian descent. He was huge and impressively built, with long black hair, chiseled features and a wide, gleaming smile that sent the nurses swooning every time he grinned. Dr. Benjamin Cheney was a neurosurgeon and just as impressive, with thick blonde hair, contact enhanced vibrant aqua eyes, and the best smile money could buy. Between the two of them, I would be willing to bet the cold tap in the nurse’s locker room shower stayed fairly busy, as well as the occasional empty patient room. The thought made me shudder.

From the suggestive looks and inviting smiles I saw most of the nurses giving both of them on a daily basis, I had no doubt they had their pick of the available female population. But she was different. I didn’t even know her myself, but in those few seconds our eyes were locked together, I knew instinctively that she was so far above the level of woman they were accustomed to, and she was worth far more than they knew how to give. I glanced between the two of them, disgusted that she would be nothing more to either of them than just another notch on their bedposts until the next new distraction came along. I found myself feeling protective, if not possessive, of this girl they obviously knew little about. I was certain of one thing, however; she definitely deserved better than what they had to offer. I continued to scrub quietly, taking in the banter between them, hoping to gain more information about the woman who held me captivated. They continued their exchange, but then glanced over at me, smirking.

“You know, you may have some competition there, Jake.” Dr. Cheney was eyeing me now. “It looked like she maybe had eyes for someone else.”

I couldn’t resist asking any longer. “Ok, I’ll bite. Who is she, and why do you all call her ‘Ugly Swan’?” Sometimes being the new guy could be frustrating to say the least.

“What you saw today is NOT what she normally looks like, man,” Dr. Black offered. “Normally, she looks like a prison warden or something with her hair all balled up tight on the back of her head, and those glasses she normally has on; I swear she pinched those off her old man.” They went on to explain that her name was Bella Swan, she was a case worker for CPS, and usually was nothing to look at. Somehow, I just couldn’t imagine her being anything but beautiful, no matter what she wore. These pigs obviously didn’t know true beauty when it swayed alluringly out of the room. Stop it, Edward, focus! We finished scrubbing and suiting up, heading into the O-R for what I was certain would be a long afternoon.

After hours of tedious, delicate surgery, the tiny face had started taking the shape of a human child again, in spite of the swelling. She would require a few more surgeries to completely restore her looks, but I was confident she would end up with minimal scarring on the main portion of her face. She was only eleven and still growing rapidly, which would help with healing. As good as we were, however, she would always have faint physical reminders of her night in hell, along with the ones etched in her memory she would forever have to live with. I wished so hard I had within my power the gift to remove those marks as well.

The day had been as long as I predicted, and I was exhausted. Thoughts of warm brown eyes stayed with me all day, and I was ready to be alone for a while with my dreams of her. With Stephenie finally stabilized and settled for the next few hours, I breathed a sigh of relief and stretched my neck, glad to be able to go get some rest.

I finally headed home to my apartment and Sebastian, my Bella Swan substitute for the night.

Chapter: 3

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 3 – Double Take

Bella

As I suspected, I spent a couple of hours after lunch in my office crying and trying to get the image of Stephenie’s mangled face out of my mind. Pull it together, Bella. If Rosalie catches you breaking down like this, it won’t be pretty. I couldn’t risk getting sent home, not when there was so much to do.

I made it through the rest of the afternoon, calling the hospital to check on Stephenie’s progress every so often, and finalizing the paperwork for the placement of the Crowley girls. They were very fortunate to be going to the Cullen home. I was confident they would be as perfect a match for the girls as we could hope for. As I watched them get acquainted in the day room, Esme and Madelyn seemed to connect quickly, and I suspected Madelyn was starving for motherly attention. She had all too quickly been thrust into the role of substitute mother for her younger sisters, especially Dorianne, and had stepped up courageously and graciously. At fifteen, she already had more parenting experience than many adult parents starting out, and I admired her for her strength and dedication at such a young age.

Dorianne latched on to Carlisle, and by the time they left, she had him wrapped tightly around her little finger. Marisol was a bit shy at first, but was soon going between Esme and Carlisle, showing them her crayon drawings and chattering about wanting finger paints and sidewalk chalk to draw more pretty pictures. Esme delighted in the idea of having a budding artist to work with.

I was still concerned about Abigail, however. She spoke a little bit, but remained wide eyed and tentative, taking in everything around her. It took a bit of convincing to get her to go with the Cullen’s, but she finally went when Dr. Cullen promised an ice cream stop on the way home. We all agreed the three oldest would need to see Alice for therapy to help them work through the trauma that had been their life the past few months, and for the older two, possibly years. The extent of the sexual abuse at the hands of their father was not as of yet fully understood, since they had only been in protective care a few days and had barely gotten settled before their father attacked the foster home. With him gone, maybe it would be easier for them to heal and move on. At least, I hoped so.

As I was packing up to leave for the day, Rosalie appeared in my doorway, a look of misty bliss on her face. I knew that look on her, but never had I seen her look this far gone before, nor this quickly. Looks like the law was on her side, I giggled to myself.

“I take it that enchanted look on your face has something to do with the dashing young police officer you were huddled in the corner with this morning?” I could tell I hit the mark when she broke out in a full-faced grin and her eyes lit up and sparkled at the mention of Emmett Cullen.

“Oh, my gosh. He’s the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” she smiled dreamily. “It was all I could do to keep my hands off of him and not take his shirt off right there in front of his parents so I could kiss him all over. And speaking of his parents, they were the sweetest people I’ve ever met. We’re so fortunate to have them in the program.”

I smiled and nodded, agreeing with her. “They seemed like the kind of people you could trust your life with. I’m so glad they were available to take the Crowley children. I think that one’s going to be a match made in heaven and I wouldn’t be surprised if they ended up adopting them.” I smiled, remembering how they just meshed together like a family almost instantly. Alice and Jasper walked in at that moment, also ready to leave for the day.

“By the way,” Rosalie remembered, “Emmett’s parents invited all of us to come over for a small get together at their house. Dorianne’s first birthday is coming up and they wanted to make it special. It’ll also give us a chance to check up on the girls and see how they’re adjusting.” And give you a chance to check out Emmett some more! “They invited us to bring a guest as well, so Jasper, you’re invited, too. Bella, well, you know….”

Rose had given up on me some time ago. She went along on many of mine and Alice’s shopping excursions and tried hard, like Alice, to infect me with their sickness that was dressing en vogue. However, after the last round of protests, she gave up and left me to my own devices. She had little time or patience with anyone who couldn’t see the value of a designer label, and she found me particularly frustrating, claiming I had so much to work with naturally, but refused to ‘work it’ since I had it. I still couldn’t see it.

I did get my revenge once. I managed to drag them both into a thrift store and almost hyperventilated with laughter as they literally cringed and held their breath at everything I pulled off the racks. When I tried to drag them into the dressing rooms, they almost bolted. The very thought of trying on an item previously worn by a stranger made them practically break out in hives. It was one shopping experience none of us would forget any time soon. The very mention of going to a thrift store still sends Rosalie running in terror.

Rosalie stopped and looked me up and down seriously for a moment, taking in my blue top and tight black skirt, stiletto heels, and lack of glasses and hair bun. “You know, Bella, there may be hope for you yet,” she said with a gleam in her eye that had me worried. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Alice?” Oh, no. I recognized that look in Alice’s eyes again. Here it comes…

“Indeed I am, Rose. Bella’s in need of some retail therapy! Honestly, Bella, you need to give us another chance. After the way that gorgeous doctor had to pick his jaw up off the floor today, I would definitely say you’re on to something with this new look.” Alice was bouncing up and down at the prospect of dragging me to the stores and attempting to work her strange magic on me, one more time.

“What gorgeous doctor?” Rosalie asked, looking between the two of us. My cheeks flushed red, and Rose’s brow shot up. “Oh, do tell!” And Alice was off, recanting our encounter earlier with Dr. Masen, in great and steamy detail, much to my rosy faced embarrassment.

The thought of Dr. Masen made me blush furiously from head to toe and my heart started racing, again. Surely he only stared at me because he was shocked at how awful I looked. I couldn’t say the same myself, though. He was the most incredible man I had ever seen, and his face kept slipping into my thoughts all afternoon. His piercing green eyes had turned my insides to mush in an instant, and the way he smelled made my mouth water, among other things. There was sadness in his eyes, thought, and I wanted so badly in those few seconds to reach out and caress his perfect jaw and run my hands through his auburn hair. Get real, Bella, he’s on a different planet than you!

“You two can’t be serious! I looked like hell!” Or at least I thought I did. Alice turned to Jasper, the only man around, to get his opinion.

“Jasper?” Alice turned to him grinning but serious. “Would you say Bella looks better now or when you first walked in and saw her this morning?” Alice made me step out from behind my desk and twirl around for Jasper’s appraisal. I felt like a prize heifer being evaluated for auction. After what seemed like a little too long, Jasper finally pulled his eyes away from me and turned back to Alice.

“Definitely better this evening, I would say,” Jasper smiled appreciatively. Surely he was just going along with Alice to be agreeable, but I looked up to catch him watching me again, still smiling. “Really, Bella, they’re right. You’re stunning.”

“Ok, no more bun head, Bella!” Alice demanded as she stood menacingly in front of me with her hands on her hips. “I’m pulling an intervention here. If you come in again with your hair up like that, I’ll body tackle you myself if I must to get it down!” She would, too, I was certain of it by the look in her eyes. The little monster could be ruthless when she was trying to get her way. “And don’t even THINK about getting those same eyeglass frames. What Dorianne did to them is nothing compared to what I’ll do!”

I did have to get another pair of glasses, but for now I would have to rely on my contacts. Maybe they were right. I actually felt pretty today, especially after visiting Stephenie this morning. Our brief conversation made me realize that true beauty didn’t necessarily require a designer label, just a good heart, but it never hurt to have good friends like Rose and Alice who loved me and encouraged me to be my best.

Before we parted, we made plans to go shopping. I wanted to get Dorianne something for her birthday, and I wanted to take the other girls a little something, too. Alice and Rosalie planned to drag me to as many stores as necessary to supplement my wardrobe, or if Alice had her way as I suspected, to replace it all together.

As we were leaving the building, I caught sight of my full reflection for the first time today in the tall windows made mirrors by the deep shadows outside and the lights inside the lobby. I almost didn’t recognize myself at first, but slowed down to take a better look as I was leaving. I didn’t look that bad at all actually. Maybe there was hope for this sow’s ear yet…

I pulled in front of my place, careful not to park in the driveway so my new tenant renting the apartment at the back of the house could get in and out. I hadn’t met him yet, but the realtor that handled the lease arrangement for me said he was an upstanding young man, and I had nothing to worry about. She had smiled and winked at me, and I couldn’t help but wonder what she knew that I didn’t.

I stopped to reminisce a little and smiled as I almost always did these days when I took the time to look at my new home. Actually, it wasn’t new at all, but quite old, and very familiar. I had spent many happy days here during my lifetime, and the enormous white house was now mine. My fondest memories were of sitting on the front porch swing with my grandfather as he told me stories off the top of this head like he was reading them from a book. My Grammy would come out with a huge plate of her famous lemon cookies and my favorite purple Kool-Aid, joining us on the swing. She would smile lovingly at Poppa and close her eyes as we swung gently back and forth, listening to his stories. I think she loved them, and him, as much as I did.

I helped them over the years to plant the flowers and rosebushes that surrounded the house, and the tree house Poppa and I built in the giant old tree in the front yard when I was ten was still there. The deep porch wrapped all the way around to the back of the house, and was the stage for many impromptu plays, wars with neighborhood kids, and naps throughout the years. My old tricycle still sat under the front window, a pot of pink geraniums balanced on the broad seat.

Grammy and Poppa put a lifetime’s worth of love and work into this home and when they passed they left it to me, their only grandchild, and according to my dad, the sun in their sky and their reason for living as long as they did. He said Poppa told him once that he hoped one day I would find a man who would love me as much as he did Grammy and fill the house with lots of happy, laughing children and friends, and live to know the kind of love they had, the kind that would transcend time, hardship, and even death. Though they were now gone, I felt their loving presence around me constantly while I was here, and knew they were watching over me, just waiting to welcome that special person to bring that kind of love into this home again.

I unlocked the front door and made my way inside, to be met by a pair of vivid copper eyes and the familiar ‘baby’ cries I had become accustomed to. “Ok, Felicity, just give me a minute to put my stuff down first!” My enormous calico cat was winding herself around my legs, begging for attention, and food. She was a gorgeous, fluffy roly-poly of a cat, and most certainly queen of the house. I had intended to get a puppy, despite my fears, but some of the neighborhood kids came trolling door to door last spring with a wagon full of kittens, and when I stepped out to look, this little ball of fur launched itself onto my pants leg and quickly climbed up to my shoulder and refused to get down.

“She’s yours now!” the kids squealed and turned around, leaving me staring eyeball to eyeball with a face that would melt even the most devoted dog lover. She was mostly Persian, with a healthy dose of bitch thrown in just for good measure. I had never known a cat that would come when you called it, but Felicity would, so I guess I sort of got a little bit of the dog I wanted.

She was normally very laid back, but ever since my new tenant moved in, she regularly paced back and forth in front of the locked door that adjoined the attached apartment to the main house. I understood my new tenant also had a cat, so I assumed she just smelled it under the door. Hmm, maybe there’s a kitty love connection here to be made. I laughed to myself. Bella, are you so lonely that even kitty love is intriguing? Geez! How pathetic was this line of thought!

I fed Felicity, and then grabbed the pot of leftover soup out of the fridge for myself, enjoying the heady aroma of tomatoes and herbs filling the house as it heated on the ancient stove. The antiquated range had been a fixture in the house since the late 1940’s, but still worked better than most modern appliances. I loved to use it and cooked on it whenever I could. Besides, homemade soup beat fast food any day.

I ran upstairs and changed, pulling my hair up in a loose ponytail, and then slipped on just a pair of thin white cotton boxer shorts and a sheer tank top. Fall was right around the corner, but the days were still warm, making it warm in the house with no air conditioning. I grabbed my favorite Big Band record to put on the old stereo before going to the kitchen, stopping to raise a couple of windows in the living room to allow the cooler evening breeze to soothe me, along with the music. After getting a bowl of soup, a glass of wine, and some bread I had made, I piled up on the old floral sofa to go through my mail and enjoy the lively strains of Glen Miller.

I hadn’t had the heart to change much in the house since I moved in after Grammy passed, as I found it very comforting, and it made me feel like I still sort of had them here with me. The house was decorated in a style Alice called ‘early junk shop’, which was just my style. Grammy and Poppa loved those stores as much as I did, spending hours on end milling through the junk for treasures, usually arm in arm. Anything Grammy wanted, Poppa was up for, even if, I suspected, he didn’t really like it. He was only truly happy if she was happy, which was his main goal in life. Most of the furnishings were actually antiques and quite lovely, fitting the style and age of the house perfectly.

I was about half way through my dinner when someone knocked on the front door. It was after eight o’clock, so I couldn’t imagine who would be at my door at this hour. I opened the door expecting to find one of the neighborhood kids looking to make extra money mowing lawns. The man standing there turned around and froze in place, for the second time today, as our eyes met. He had an envelope in his hand, and his jaw was on the stoop.

“Can I help you?” I asked, able to not remember what my name was or least of all what I was, or wasn’t, wearing. He blinked, then shook his head as if trying to wake up and handed me the envelope, his green eyes sparkling.

“Hi, we haven’t met yet, officially anyway. I’m your new tenant, Dr. Edward Masen. It’s nice to finally meet you.” He reached out his hand again to shake mine and I found myself holding my breath from the sensation as his hand touched mine. “I just wanted to drop off my rent for next month and introduce myself.”

The same blush I had been fighting all day at the thought of him rose again in my cheeks and my heart pounded erratically when I took his hand. The cool evening breeze blew in through the open door and I shivered, finally remembering that I was standing there in just a pair of boxers and a tank top. I suddenly became very self conscious and wrapped my arms over my chest to cover the obvious fact that I was getting chilled, but not before my visitor noticed the results of my chill through the thin white top I was wearing. Embarrassed, his eyes flashed back up to mine and an apologetic smile flashed across his beautiful face.

“Sorry to come around so late, but I just got home.” He looked tired, and I would bet he hadn’t eaten all day from the looks of him. I don’t know what possessed me, but I found myself inviting him in. I thought he was going to turn me down the way he hesitated, but the smell of homemade soup caught his attention.

“Am I interrupting your dinner? I’m so sorry!” He looked like he was about to pass out as he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Come a little closer, I’d like to try that myself. What was I thinking?! Get a grip, Bella!

“Can I offer you some homemade soup and bread? I have plenty and it’s still hot.” He smiled the most gorgeous smile, obviously starving.

“Only if I’m not putting you out,” he said shyly as he followed me into the house and through to the kitchen. I could feel his intense gaze on my back, and it made the blush rise even hotter to my cheeks.

“No, not at all, I’m glad for the company to help finish it. I would probably just have to throw the rest out or freeze it anyway. I can’t seem to cook just enough for myself, especially when it comes to soup,” I laughed. “Besides, according to my Grammy, it’s rude not to have something on hand to offer unexpected guests.” Would you like a side of Bella with that? What’s gotten into me? I thought about running up to put something else on, but it really was warm in the house, and it was my house, so I decided against it.

He laughed at my last comment, remembering something. “My Gran was the same way. She always had something on hand to eat. You could always count on getting fed at her house.”

I dipped up a huge bowl of soup and cut a large piece of bread for him. I poured him a glass of wine, and we made our way back to the living room, where he sat down in my Poppa’s old recliner, looking perfectly at home there. “This is a great house. The realtor said you inherited it from your grandparents. Have you lived here long?”

“I’ve been living here full time for the past three years since graduating college, helping to care for my Grammy who just passed away a few months ago, so I’ve actually only been living here alone since then. My grandparents owned the house for over fifty years before I inherited it after Grammy passed.” I placed his food on the coffee table and turned to get a tray table. Felicity joined us and eyed him a second before jumping up in the chair and lying down beside him.

“Crazy cat! I’ve never seen her do that with anyone but me before. She’s up to no good. Watch her or she’ll try to spill your wine.” Felicity was notorious for dumping glasses when her unsuspecting victims weren’t looking.

I offered him Poppa’s old tin TV tray table, and he smiled again. “Don’t tell me, this belonged to your grandparents, too?”

I wasn’t sure if he was pleased or making fun of me, so I held my chin up and smiled. “Yes, as a matter of fact, it did. Some of the finest meals ever made were served on that tray.” I looked at him defiantly, and he started laughing.

“The ones my grandmother had were avocado green with gold trim. Only the most important guests were served on them, according to grandpa. I loved those!” I relaxed a bit and helped him set up the tray, setting his bowl in front of him. He smiled and then took a spoon full of the soup, growing quiet. I watched as he got a faraway look in his eyes. “Did you know my mom?” he asked suddenly, looking at me in wonder. “I would swear this taste just like the soup she used to make for us when I was a kid.” He took another spoonful of the soup and closed his eyes as he ate, remembering something pleasant, maybe even emotional, as he savored the flavors.

“Is that a good thing?” I asked, not wanting to assume it was a compliment, but hoping just the same.

“Better than good. I haven’t had soup like this since my mom died…” he stopped, sadness crossing his beautiful face for a moment, before he smiled again. “It’s really good. Thank you for feeding me tonight. I can cook a little bit myself, but I don’t get much of a chance these days. I haven’t even unpacked my kitchen stuff yet.” I wanted to ask him more questions about his family, but decided to leave it for hopefully another night. It seemed hard for him to talk about, and he already looked so tired.

As we finished eating, we talked about work and Stephenie. He was obviously very affected by her, as I was, and he was optimistic she would be ok, physically at least. I wanted to talk to him longer, but I watched him as he fought to stay alert, almost losing the battle a couple of times, and figured I had better let him get back before he fell asleep in the recliner and I would have to fight myself all night to stay out of his lap.

“I know you’ve had a long day. I’ll bet you’re dead on your feet.” I arose, taking our dishes back to the kitchen. I stopped up the sink and ran water to wash up since there was no dishwasher. He came into the kitchen and stood next to me to rinse, placing the dishes in the drainer to dry. When we were done, he turned to head for the front door, but I stopped him.

“It feels wrong making you walk all the way around to get to the back of the house when you’re obviously so tired. Why don’t you just go through here?” I pointed to the door behind me that led into the attached apartment in the back. I suspect it was probably the original back door to the house before the apartment was added. I had never opened the door since he moved in, but I knew it would be quicker than having him walk around, and he looked like he was about ready to fall over. I unlocked and opened the door that led into a closet built into the apartment bedroom after wardrobe cabinets had become a thing of the past. Laughing, he stepped into the doorway, pushed his clothes to the side, and reached past them for the knob to the closet door that opened up into his side. Ducking the rod, he stepped over the things on the floor of the narrow closet and into his apartment.

He turned around and leaned in the doorway on his side of the closet, smiling a breathtaking, sleepy smile at me. “Good night, Miss Swan. Thank you again for dinner.”

“Bella, please, and you’re welcome anytime,” I smiled, wondering if I would be able to stay away from this door any more than Felicity did now.

“I’ll hold you to that, Bella.”

I closed and relocked the door and headed to bed for what I was sure to be a very sleepless night.

I didn’t think I would ever get to sleep, but the events of the day finally overtook me and I drifted off, exhausted. The vision of Edward standing in the closet doorway stayed with me into the night, inviting him to me, invoking a sensual dream the likes of which I had never had, but would welcome again anytime…

My delicious dream was interrupted by a noise worthy of a bucket of ice water being dumped from my second floor bedroom window. “Bella! Let me in! Come on, hurry up! The wind is messing up my hair!” Alice screeched under my window from the front walkway. She began banging on my front door again, causing Edward to slip away as my eyes fluttered open in frustration. I grabbed my robe and wrapped it around me and ran down the stairs to open the door before Alice could knock it off the hinges, hoping I could control the urge to murder her right there on the porch.

“You know, it would serve you right if the neighbors called the police on you and had you hauled off for disturbing the peace!” I growled at her, still irritated that she interrupted a perfectly decadent dream.

“Aren’t we grumpy this morning! You’re so red and breathless, Bella. Did you just get back from a run or something?” Alice pushed past me, handing me a cup of coffee.

“You startled me is all,” I half lied, trying to compose myself. “What are you doing here so early?”

“Today is a new day, Bella, and I’m here to make sure you start it off right. Jasper and I made a couple of quick stops last night and got you these.” She handed me a boutique garment bag and a couple of shopping bags from her favorite shops. Inside the garment bag was a beautiful skirt outfit, and the other bags held sexy sheer pink lace undergarments, Alice approved, of course, and a pair of gorgeous shoes. We had been shopping together for so long Alice knew all of my sizes perfectly. She had another piece of what looked like luggage in her other hand.

“Are you staying over?” I asked, confused.

“No, silly, these are beauty essentials. You’re getting the full Alice treatment this morning!” Just shoot me now…

“No…!” I started to protest, but Alice got that look in her eyes that let me know immediately there would be no arguing with her this time.

“Just let me work my magic on you this morning, Bella. If you go through the day without anyone saying or doing anything any different than usual, I’ll back off and not bother you again. But I know you’re going to turn heads today, and probably even have Dr. Cheney and Dr. Black trying to hit on you before the day is out, and you’ve heard the stories about those two; they only chase the prettiest women. If they approach you, then you’ll know I’m right!” Alice was bouncing up and down in her typical fashion, exuding excitement with her puppy dog eyes. How could I say no to that face?

“Fine, but nothing too drastic, got it! I’m still me, no matter what.” Alice started clapping and jumping up and down.

“Perfect! Ok, get your shower and I’ll meet you in your room.” Alice raced off up the stairs, doing a happy dance every few steps. As much as I hated the fuss, I loved seeing her happy.

I headed into the shower, wishing I was alone a little while so I could relieve the tension brought on by my dream myself. I’d rather go find relief on the other side of that door off the kitchen…

I showered quickly and returned to my room wrapped in a towel to find Alice waiting for me. She had spread every kind of beauty product imaginable out on my bed. “Do you really think all this is necessary, Alice?” I couldn’t imagine how all those products were going to make me look any better.

“Have some faith in the magic of product, Bella!” Alice chirped, piping a mound of something strawberry scented into her palm for my hair. Alice was in her element, so I just sat back and let her do her thing. After she got through with my hair, I put in my contacts, and then she did my face, offering me waterproof mascara and eyeliner in case I had another crying fit today.

I opened the garment bag to find she had bought me a beautiful fitted pale coral princess cut blouse with a coordinating printed skirt. It was made from a material that felt like liquid butter, hugging my hips and thighs seductively with a fluttery hemline, and was quite a bit shorter than my normal calf-length dark wool skirts. The almost flesh colored taupe stiletto sandals were very comfortable and made me feel like I actually had legs.

An hour after Alice had arrived, I stood in front of the full length mirror by my closet, hardly able to recognize the person looking back at me. Yeah, I looked hot, but decided I had better not let Alice know just how much I liked it or she would be on my doorstep early every morning, not to mention the annoyingly repetitive choruses of ‘I told you so’ I would be subjected to every day.

“Am I done yet?” I tried to sound irritated, but it was hard when Alice was obviously as pleased with her handy work as I was. She grinned and nodded knowingly, letting me know she had my number. “Let’s get going then. I want to stop off and see Stephenie before we hit the office.” On the way to the hospital, I told Alice about my evening with Edward.

“Was he the one who almost had you pinned to the wall in the surgery area? Oooh, he’s so hot, AND he’s living right behind you?! Talk about a gift from the Gods! Bella, how do you sleep at night knowing he’s just on the other side of that door?” Alice’s eyes were wide.

“Unfortunately, in a highly aroused state!” I giggled, turning red at the memory of my dream last night, the intimate details of which I didn’t feel the immediate need to share with Alice.

Some genies were just better left in the bottle.

Edward

I was never so glad to see a driveway in my life. As I pulled in, I noticed the lights inside the main house were still on, so I assumed my new landlady was still up. I usually got home much later than this and the lights were always out by then, so I had never tried to disturb her. Since I really had nothing to hurry home for except Sebastian, and he rarely went out of his way to greet me other than to open an eye to make sure I was who I was supposed to be when I came in, I often stayed late into the night at the hospital.

I was too tired tonight to hang around there, having been in surgery all day with Stephenie. I hadn’t bothered to eat anything, either, which I’m sure didn’t help my tiredness. I was planning on just grabbing a bowl of cereal and heading to bed early, but I wasn’t sure when I might get the opportunity to introduce myself again before midnight, so I decided to take a chance and see if she was still up. My rent check was due in a few days, so I went ahead and grabbed my checkbook so I could just make it out for her and be done with it. When she answered the door, I froze. The same pair of extraordinarily expressive brown eyes that had stunned me this morning at the hospital were looking back at me again now.

She looked confused at first, and then she realized who I was from this morning. I had to shake myself to kick my brain back in gear before my mouth would work. Remembering my manners, I introduced myself formally. I held out my hand to shake hers, explaining my intrusion. When our hands touched, warmth like I had never experienced engulfed me, making me feel like my soul was being drawn out of my body into hers and returned to me twice as strong. I was fairly certain she felt something as well by the look on her face.

She was flushed beautifully, her pale skin almost shimmering in the amber glow of the sunset. The evening air had turned cool, and as she stood there in the doorway, a gust of cold wind swirled past her, raising obvious goose bumps on her delicate skin, causing her to shiver, and making the fact that she was chilled sharply visible through the thin top she was wearing. Realizing what was happening, she folded her arms across her chest, but not before I had gotten a good look at her reason for blushing. I felt the heat rise in my cheeks as our eyes met, and I knew I was busted for looking. I tried to brush it off, but I could tell she was as embarrassed as I was.

“Sorry to come around so late, but I just got home.” I locked my eyes on her face, trying hard not to look down again. My stomach growled and I was sure I was going to faint dead away on her porch, so I figured I had better beat a hasty retreat to the back and get something down me before I keeled over. Just then, a smell so delicious hit me, I almost fell over trying to inhale enough of it. She must have heard my stomach growling and took pity on me.

I was hesitant to accept for fear of inconveniencing her, but the aroma was more than I could stand, not to mention the idea of getting to spend some time with her was irresistible. She assured me it was no trouble as a followed her through the house back into the kitchen. Eyes up, Edward! I had to remind myself as she moved in front of me, leaving me trailing behind her, drawn forward by her intoxicating scent. I struggled to regain my senses, finally taking in the house as we went. The decor reminded me of my grandparent’s house, and I immediately felt at home. The smell of the soup and bread was driving me crazy, and I watched as she got a bowl ready for me, along with some bread and a glass of wine.

When we got back into the living room I sat down, and her cat immediately took a liking to me, deciding to join me in the recliner. I held my wine while she reached and got a tray table for me. For a moment I felt like I was twelve again, sitting in my Gran’s living room, eating off one of her trays she saved for special company.

“Don’t tell me, this belonged to your grandparents, too?” I laughed. She seemed to be offended until I explained that my Gran had them, too, and I liked them. She helped me get settled and I started eating, keeping an eye on the cat as she watched my glass.

When I tasted the soup, I was instantly taken back to a warm inviting kitchen where I watched my mom spend hours cooking for us. She was an excellent cook, and some of my fondest memories were of us together in that kitchen. I took another bite and closed my eyes, getting lost in the flavors and the memories of my mom. I couldn’t help but feel a moment of loss, but I didn’t want her to think my mood was because I didn’t like her cooking, so I reassured her that the soup was excellent.

We finished eating and talked for a while, but I wasn’t much company for long, as the day was catching up to me. I helped her clean up, and was about to head for the door when she suggested I cut through the door adjoining the house and apartment. I figured the mysterious door at the back of my small closet led into the main house, but I had no idea I had been so close to this incredible, beautiful woman all this time.

I stepped through my closet into my bedroom, and turned to look back at her once more to commit her face to memory so the dreams I was sure to have of her tonight would do her justice.

“Good night, Miss Swan. Thank you again for dinner.”

“Bella, please, and you’re welcome anytime.”

Was that an open invitation? She was breathtaking in the dim light of the antiquated kitchen, and it was all I could do to keep from pulling her through the doors and over to my bed just a few feet behind me. It was a good thing I was so exhausted, or sleep would be impossible tonight.

“I’ll hold you to that, Bella.”

And I meant it.

As I predicted, Bella was the center of my dreams. My mind went back to where she stood in the kitchen, and instead of stepping through the closet into my room, I shut the door back and took her by the hands, pulling her gently to me like I had wanted to all night, kissing her full lips gently for the first time.

I was on the verge of making her mine when her hair started tickling my face. I pushed it away, but it fell into my face again, tickling my nose. Suddenly, I was having difficulty breathing and felt like there was a heavy weight on my chest. The next sound she made surprised me.

“Mrreeooorrr.”

I opened my eyes to find all twenty two pounds of Sebastian sprawled across my chest, his tail swishing lazily over my face. This was not the way I wanted my dream of Bella to end, staring a cat in the ass.

Frustrated, I sat up, sliding Sebastian onto the mattress with a soft ‘plop’, where he splayed out on his back and went back to sleep. My alarm clock read 6:19 A.M. I decided to get up and hit the shower and finish where my dream left off. Not nearly as enticing as my dream had been, but I did need to be able to walk the rest of the morning. And since I had the feeling I would be seeing Miss Swan again today, I needed to be able to think clearly as well.

At least until she looked at me again with those smoldering brown eyes that would surely be my undoing.

Chapter: 4

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 4 - Paws For Concern

Bella

I quickly learned a valuable lesson: Never bet against Alice. We made it to the hospital before going in to work to check on Stephenie, and Alice was on high alert, watching everyone around us as we walked in. I never would have believed it. Walking into the hospital was very surreal. Every doctor, orderly, and pretty much every other male, and a few females, we passed in the corridors looked at me, some smiling, others, stopping to stare. And people I knew or had passed before, looked especially shocked. Alice was grinning from ear to ear and shooting me knowing looks, confirming she had won the deal.

We found the room they had moved Stephenie into, and peeked in quietly. The nurses were just finishing checking on her, so we slipped in to say hello. Her head was covered in thick gauze and bandages, but some of the swelling had gone down. She still looked pretty messed up, but beautiful, at least to me.

“Stephenie?” Alice leaned over the side of her bed, picking up her hand. “Do you remember my voice?”

“Were you the lady that gave me lip gloss?” Stephenie managed to whisper. Tears started forming in both our eyes again that she remembered us, and I was so glad Alice had suggested the waterproof eye makeup.

“Yeah, it’s me again. Are you in much pain?” Alice’s hands were trembling slightly as she held Stephenie’s. “If it hurts to talk, just squeeze my hand to let me know and we won’t expect you to. We just wanted to check on you. Bella’s here, too. Madelyn sends her love and she’ll be up to see you as soon as they’ll let her in.”

Stephenie seemed to be able to speak without too much pain, so we talked with her for a few minutes, answering her questions when she asked for more details about what had happened at the Newton’s home. She seemed relieved that she would be joining the Crowley girls at the Cullen’s house. Her parents were both in prison on drug charges, and it would be at least eight years before either of them would be eligible for parole. She had known nothing but foster care for years, both good and bad, and was happy to be going to a home that wanted her. She was quiet for a moment, and then turned to Alice, trying to open her eyes. “Alice, do you have a mirror?” she asked, managing to open one eye slightly.

Alice looked up at me, wondering if she should let Stephenie see her own swollen face. After studying Stephenie’s expression for a moment, she reached into her purse and pulled out her compact, and lip gloss. Not allowing her to see her face would probably worry her even more, interfering with her healing, which she didn’t need.

“Remember, now, you’re really swollen and have lots of bandages everywhere, so you’re not going to be able to see much.”

Alice held up the mirror for Stephenie, watching her tentatively as she took it all in. “It’s actually not as bad as I thought.” Stephenie tried to smile, but stopped when her broken cheekbone twinged sharply. “I was thinking about getting my hair cut short anyway. I guess I don’t have to worry about that now.”

Alice dabbed a little lip gloss on her parched lips again, and Stephenie sighed. “I guess I’m going to have to invest in some industrial strength cover up, huh?” she joked, again, trying to comfort us. This child was truly a remarkable soul. Alice and I laughed, both of us with tears streaming down our faces.

“You’re amazingly beautiful, regardless of a few scars, Stephenie. Don’t you ever forget that,” Alice whispered in her ear and kissed her hand. “We’ll let you rest now. See you tomorrow.” We headed back down the corridors and Alice got a determined look on her face. “As soon as they clear her to wear makeup and she’s able to get around, I’m taking her and Madelyn shopping.” Alice flashed her angelic smile, and I knew that would be a day the girls would not soon forget.

We were about to exit the hospital and head for our office when Alice threw her hand up in front of me, slowing our pace as the automatic doors opened. Puzzled, I looked over at her to see her grinning smugly, and then followed her gaze, which landed on three gorgeous doctors, standing frozen with mouths open and looking dumbfounded, staring at me as we walked slowly out the doors. I knew the two of them in front all too well. They probably thought I hadn’t heard the rude nickname they had assigned to me, but it was hard not to when the catty nurses who dated them giggled it amongst themselves when I passed them in the corridors.

“Miss Swan, how nice to see you again!” Dr. Cheney grabbed my hand and kissed the back of it trying to be smooth, keeping a hold on me as if he were marking his territory.

Dr. Black grabbed my other hand, trying to drag me away from him. ”Miss Swan, would you care to join me for a cup of coffee?” I looked at Alice in a panic for help, hoping they weren’t planning on playing some sort of demented ‘wishbone’ game with me. She looked like she was about to burst out laughing, which was starting to annoy the hell out of me.

Edward stepped forward, his green eyes sparkling with what looked like a combination of excitement and rage. “Sorry, gentlemen, Miss Swan already has plans.” He pulled my hands free from both of theirs, hurrying me forward while wrapping his arm around my waist. Everywhere he touched me burned, and memories of my dream from this morning started seeping back to me, causing my face to flush and threatening to undo my composure on the spot. Alice waved goodbye and winked, grinning from ear to ear at me and at the two doctors still standing in the doorway with their mouths agape.

We quietly hurried to the cafeteria where Edward bought coffee for us, and we sat for a minute to talk. “Thanks for the rescue. I wasn’t sure what had gotten into those two.” I was still in shock over what Alice had predicted, remembering what she had said about the doctors and their attention to only beautiful women. I couldn’t help but blush at the idea of them finding me attractive, and that Alice’s prediction had been so accurate. That little gift of hers could be unnerving! “Alice warned me this might happen, I just didn’t believe her,” I said, thinking out loud. I was quiet for a moment, and then looked up. Edward was watching me, smiling the most breathtaking smile that made my heart race again.

“And what was it she warned you about?” he asked, curious.

“The Testosterone Twins, I think she called them; Dr. Cheney and Dr. Black. They have a reputation for chasing only the prettiest skirts in the hospital, but I can’t believe they stopped to talk to me. They pass me almost daily in the hospital and have never said a word or shown one bit of interest in me. That was just really weird.”

He looked at me briefly as if he wanted to say something but began laughing, finding the nickname Alice called his colleagues hilarious. Watching him laugh was turning me on to the point of distraction, and I blushed even redder as I remembered my dream. He had a curious look on his face again, obviously wanting to ask me something else.

“What are you thinking?” he finally asked as he tilted his head to one side, smiling wider. I caught him glancing down at my legs, and I remembered how he had looked at me like that in my dream. I turned deep red remembering how that felt.

“You really don’t want to know,” was all I could get out. Much more of this and I was going to completely lose it. He seemed to sense my discomfort and changed the subject as he shifted in his seat.

“Was that Alice with you outside?” he asked before draining his cup and dropping it into a trash can.

“Yes, Alice Brandon. We work together at CPS. She’s a child psychologist for the Department, and one of my best friends.” I remembered my morning at her hands, and felt a surge of thankfulness, and a bit of mischief. “Best friend and fashion Nazi,” I laughed. I stood up, really needing to get to work, but not wanting to leave his company. “I really have to get back to my office. Thanks again for the coffee and the rescue.”

I turned to go, but he caught my arm, lighting it on fire with his touch. “Thanks again for last night,” he murmured low, the look in his eyes scorching. I was suddenly lost in my dream of him, wanting to thank him instead for the pleasure he had given me, even if he had no idea. It was all I could do to keep from leaning in and sucking on his perfect bottom lip.

“Anytime.” I smiled at him and left quickly before I made a scene in the cafeteria that would have everyone talking for the next year.

I was still in shock that Dr. Black and Dr. Cheney had been so pushy this morning. After leaving Edward in the cafeteria, I headed back for my office, looking forward to the three block walk back to the CPS complex so I would have a while to enjoy the fresh air and the beautiful crisp fall sunshine. As I was walking out of the hospital someone caught my arm from behind and I was spun around to see Dr. Black, grinning like he had just won the lottery.

“Miss Swan! Where are you off to in such a hurry?” His perfect white smile was broad and stunning set in his tanned, chiseled face, and his long shiny black hair was pulled back neatly in a band. He really was strikingly handsome and it was obvious from the tight fitting shirt he was wearing under his white coat that he worked out – a lot. No wonder the nurses around here called him ‘Tarzan’, I laughed to myself.

“I’m on my way back to my office and I’m running late, so if you’ll excuse me…” I pulled my arm from his grasp and turned back around and started walking towards the door. As the automatic doors swung open, a strong gust of wind lifted the flouncy hem of my skirt up high on the side, exposing the fact that I was wearing a sheer lacy pink thong. I heard Dr. Black gasp behind me, and I looked back to see him frozen in place with his mouth open, again, as he looked hungrily at me. I couldn’t help feeling mischievous. “The bra matches,” I announced to him over my shoulder with a wink and continued out into the sunshine, my hair billowing behind me in the gentle breeze. That’ll teach him to call me ‘Ugly Swan’, I laughed triumphantly to myself.

I finally got back to my office to find Alice and Rose huddled together, laughing hysterically. They were too excited for it to be a work conversation, so I had to ask. “Ok, what are you two giggling about?” From the looks on their faces, I could tell I was missing something, I just didn’t know what yet.

“Oh, nothing,” Alice smiled innocently, trying to be coy, but Rose couldn’t keep a straight face and started cracking up, laughing hysterically.

“We heard what you did to Dr. Black!” She was laughing so hard now she was turning red and gasping for air. I looked at them both like they were insane.

“What? How did you hear about that? It just happened a few minutes ago!” I was the one confused now.

“Karen called me from the front desk. It’s all over the hospital! Apparently, whatever you said to Dr. Black flustered him so badly, he turned around and walked into a corner and banged his knee hard enough they think he may have dislocated his kneecap.” They were both in hysterics now, and I couldn’t help but join them.

“Well, the wind blew my skirt up as I was about to leave and he was standing right behind me giving him a nice view of the left side of my rear and the back of my little pink lace thong. I just couldn’t resist letting him know that I was wearing the matching bra,” I said sweetly, with a wicked gleam in my eyes. They both burst out in another round of hysterics.

“Where’s Bella and what have you done with her?” Alice asked, grinning from ear to ear. “Our Bella would never have done something like that.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I teased, dismissing her playfully with a flourish of my hand.

“That settles it, Rose.” Alice looked at Rosalie, who nodded in agreement with whatever Alice was implying.

“What are you two planning?” I could tell something was definitely up, but they weren’t talking. When those two go silent, trouble usually follows, for me, anyway.

“You’ll see.” Alice would say no more on the subject. She ran back into her office and came out, handing me another round of shopping bags containing enough outfits she deemed appropriate for the rest of the week. I looked in the bags, discovering each outfit to be just as gorgeous as the one I was wearing. After today, I couldn’t wait to wear her selections, if for nothing else but for the comic relief.

The rest of the week was crazy. Every time we went to see Stephenie or visit any other child the Center had at the hospital for treatment, either Dr. Black or Dr. Cheney was there, and sometimes both of them, trying to get me to go out with them. They were both bringing their ‘A’ game, but I really had no interest in going out with either of them. I could have sworn that some of the nurses were being ruder to me than usual, too. They normally just ignored me or cut their eyes at me, giggling, but for some reason, they seemed to be oozing animosity. I was certain I even saw some of them making weird faces at me out of the corner of my eye.

To make matters even more interesting, Dr. Yorkie and Dr. Ateara also joined the ‘try to date Bella’ game, along with a number of male nurses and orderlies. All the attention was flattering, but a little frightening sometimes, as I could occasionally feel a strange urgency from one of the particularly elusive admirers, I assumed to be one of the orderlies, which raised the hairs on the back of my neck. I never actually saw him, but I could feel eyes on me at various times, and all my senses told me I needed to keep an eye out for that one.

It was a fairly light day for a Friday, so we were able to escape quite a bit earlier than usual. The weather cooled down throughout the week, and driving home in the crisp fall afternoon air, I enjoyed the breathtaking beauty of the changing leaves and the spicy smell of chimney smoke in the air from the first fireplace uses of the season. This time of year always sparked my domestic side, making me want to cook and bake, kind of like a precursor for the holidays. This was my favorite time of year, rich with jeweled colors and delicious aromas that reminded me of family, home, and traditions.

Felicity greeted me as I entered, weaving my legs like she always did when I came home. I fed her and then ran upstairs and changed into one of Grammy’s old dresses she had given me as soon as I was big enough to fill it out. I stopped to put a Benny Goodman record on the record player before donning an apron and getting to work in the kitchen, filling the house with the delicious bouquet of chocolate, fennel, and yeast. I put a huge roast in the electric roaster that had been Grammy’s secret weapon for getting through the holidays with limited oven real estate, the delicious aroma blending enticingly with all the others. I laughed as I caught a glimpse of myself in the reflection of the stove door. All I needed was a strand of pearls and a pair of high heels to complete the June Cleaver effect.

While the bread rose and the cake and cookies cooled, I wandered out into the back yard, collecting a basket of leaves of all different colors and some evergreen sprigs to make a centerpiece for the old maple table in the kitchen. I arranged the evergreens and leaves along with some cinnamon sticks, whole cloves, and dried apples on a platter around a large vanilla candle. The smell quickly blended with all the others wafting through the kitchen, and the glow of the candle made gentle patterns on the ceiling that danced with the flame. This would be so perfect if Edward was sitting in Poppa’s recliner reading the paper.

I wiped away a tear that escaped as the sweet memory of my Poppa, sitting in his old recliner with the paper tented across his mounded round tummy, rising and falling as he snored, left me feeling a little lonely, but not alone. If I didn’t know better, I would have sworn I could hear him laughing his quiet, soothing laugh that always made me feel safe and loved, like he knew something I didn’t. Someday, Poppa, someday…

It was getting very late, and I was putting everything away when a thought crossed my mind. I looked out the side window by the driveway and noticed Edward still wasn’t home from the hospital. Most likely, he was so busy that he didn’t eat again all day and would be going to sleep on a bowl of cereal, or worse, nothing, and starving tonight. The idea of that upset me, so I went into the other room and got one of Grammy’s TV trays, and then proceeded to make him a dinner tray, complete with dishes and a bottle of wine I opened and re-corked so he wouldn’t have to worry about an opener. I scribbled a quick note, and after scooting Felicity out of the way, I unbolted the door that led into his closet and slipped it under the door on his side, hoping he would see it. I then pushed his things to the side, taking a moment to lean in and enjoy the way his clothes smelled like him before setting the tray in the closet, and then closing and re-bolting the door. I hoped his cat didn’t eat paper.

I finished putting everything away and cleaned the kitchen, then went to bed, tired but satisfied with my afternoon’s accomplishments. I dreamed of Edward again, but this time it was of us sitting in the porch swing, both with gray hair, him telling stories to our youngest granddaughter as we gently swung, contentedly holding hands.

Felicity woke me up by jumping up on the bed and cuddling up to me, kneading my shoulder while smurgling on the edge of my blanket. I lay and watched her, amused at what a big baby she could still be sometimes. A sound I couldn’t hear from somewhere in the house caught her attention and she jumped off the bed, bolting from my room. The sight of her running out the door, fat belly swinging, had me giggling.

Coffee. I needed coffee. Now. My inner caffeine monster was awake as well so I headed down to the kitchen to put on a pot. As I rounded the corner of the kitchen, I saw Felicity pouncing on what looked like a mouse running under the door that went to the apartment. I was deathly afraid of mice, so I did what any normal woman would do: scream hysterically like she was being murdered. Startled by my screaming, Felicity jumped back, and I could see that the ‘mouse’ was actually the arm of another cat. This struck me as hilarious, and I melted into a fit of laughter.

“Bella, what’s wrong?!” Edward shouted from the other side of the closet door, sounding panicked. I couldn’t believe I had woke him up, and he got in so late. He had to still be wiped.

I picked Felicity up and unbolted the door, opening it to stare at what I would easily describe as the sexiest image I could ever hope to encounter at this hour of the morning in a closet. Edward stood there in nothing but his thin boxers, looking like he was about to kick the door in from concern, but then the grin on his face told me he liked what he saw as well. And from the looks of his boxers, he truly did. He tried to make himself less conspicuous by casually ducking his lower half behind the door on his side, but I had already seen all I needed to.

“Are you alright?” he asked, trying to act like there was nothing out of the ordinary going on behind the door. “That kind of screaming is usually reserved for intruders or large scary pests. Which was it?”

I looked down and pointed to his cat lying flat on his back, his huge inviting belly just begging to be scratched. He was so adorable I just had to pet him, which he seemed to enjoy thoroughly from the sound of his loud purr. Felicity eased up on him, smelling his ear, then proceeded to bathe his head as if she had always been with him. Edward asked me if maybe they shouldn’t be fighting or something, but I knew my cat well enough to know that she had grown accustomed to his cat and liked him.

“I suspect they’ve been getting acquainted under the door since you moved in, they’ve just been waiting for a chance to be together without this door in the way.” Sounds about right to me…stop it, Bella, before you turn red as a beet again!

I stood up and stretched and yawned, trying to finish waking up. When I looked back at Edward, he looked like he was about to faint. He quickly composed himself and thanked me for dinner, and I could tell he really did appreciate it. I could see the empty tray sitting behind him, but I would get it later. No need to be mean and make him move from there, knowing he was trying to hide his pleasure at seeing me in these pajamas. I would have to remember to thank Alice later.

“By the way, are you always this nice to your tenants?” he asked, smiling that beautiful smile I had a hard time resisting. Was he fishing to find out if I had other men I did this for?

“Actually, you’re the first tenant I’ve had, so I don’t know yet.” I looked up at him shyly, which had the desired effect, and he flashed me that heart melting smile again. That’s when the banging started. “I have to get going. My friends just got here, and I’ll never hear the end of it that I’m not ready to go. Delaying those two from the stores is hazardous to my health.” However, I couldn’t bear the thought of not seeing him again all day, so I blurted out, “Are you working all day today?” I tried not to sound like I was desperate but certain I had failed miserably. This was so not like me!

“I have rounds this morning, but I was planning to visit some friends this afternoon, nothing too special. Why?”

I told him about being invited to Dorianne’s birthday party and their offer to bring a friend, but I started to feel like I shouldn’t bother him on his day off. He probably had better things to do than attend a kiddy birthday party, so I tried to let him out gracefully. That was really stupid, Bella! “Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you don’t get to see your friends as much as you’d like…” I stammered, embarrassed to have asked for any of his time.

He got an amused look on his face and grinned. “Are you, by chance, going to the Cullen’s home?” He looked like he could start dancing at any moment. How odd!

“Yes. How did you know?” I asked, totally confused now. He explained about running into the Cullen’s in the emergency room, and then mentioned them by their first names, which led me to believe he knew them beyond just professional acquaintances.

“How do you know the Cullen’s?” I asked, not sure what was going on now. Alice was starting to get insistent, not to mention on my nerves, with her banging. “Why are they so early? I can’t believe they’re here already. I haven’t even had my coffee yet!” I grumbled mostly to myself.

“How about I tell you all the details on the way to the Cullen’s party this afternoon? You’d better get going before they kick the door in.” I could hear Alice banging louder and cursing like a sailor now, and I halfway hoped the neighbors would throw something at her to shut her up.

“Ok, well, around two o’clock this afternoon then?’”

“Works for me. See you back here?” he asked, gesturing to the door in my hand.

“Perfect! See you later.”

I closed the door and started to slide the deadbolt in place, but stopped, thinking maybe it would be a good thing if I didn’t bother, just in case he needed something, or the next time I started screaming, it was something other than a ‘large scary pest’. The thought made me shudder. I ran to the front door and threw it open to find Alice and Rose standing there smirking. Alice had a box of garbage bags in her hands.

“Are you guys here to clean up my leaves or go shopping?” I was confused as to why they would need the bags. They marched past me, looking like they were ready to overthrow a hostile foreign government and haul off the dead bodies left in their wake.

“Oh, we’re here to clean up, alright, but not your yard; Rose, check the laundry room. Bella, come with me.”

Alice dragged me up the stairs to my room, ordering me to sit up in the middle of my bed. Rose came up from the laundry room carrying the basket of laundry I had done last night, dumping it out on my bed. Alice shook open a garbage bag and started going through my clothes, tossing in several pieces off the bed before I realized what was going on.

“Why are you putting my clothes in garbage bags?” I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to like this.

“Oh, we’re just making room for the new stuff you’re going to buy today,” Alice answered cheerfully, and continued stuffing the bags with my clothes, having now moved on to my dresser.

“I’m not going to have anything left from the looks of it!” I was starting to panic seeing all my sweats and dark suits going into the bags.

Rose was busy going through my lingerie chest, grimacing at every pair of ‘granny panties’ she stuffed into her bag, and practically gagging at my collection of flannel, or as she called them ‘caste iron’, nightgowns. “Bella, these things are vile!” she screeched. “No wonder you’re still single!” Gotta love Rose’s subtly.

“Come on, guys, do I have to replace everything?!” They just looked at me incredulously and kept sorting. I had the money to do it, that wasn’t the problem. Since most of my things had come from thrift stores, and I didn’t shop for new items all that often, the money I allowed for my clothing budget had grown to a decent amount. It was just that the shock of having to do it all at once was - overwhelming.

Alice moved on to my closet, and except for the clothes she had brought me this past week and the one ‘good’ pair of jeans and top she had picked for me recently for a night out, which she tossed on the bed for me to wear today, everything else was gone.

Rose made a quick sweep of the other rooms, making sure I didn’t have a secret stash of sweats hidden somewhere I wasn’t telling them about. Finally satisfied they had wiped me out of my offending thrift store bargains, Alice and Rose tied up the bags and rolled them down the stairs, where they landed with a thud against the front door.

Alice came and sat down on my bed, and Rose joined her on the other side. “Bella, remember the other morning when I promised you I would leave you alone if nothing different happened that day with the way people, especially men, treated you?” Alice looked sincere, but I could tell she was about to burst. “I think I made my point,” she grinned smugly. “Dr. Black and Dr. Cheney proved I was right, not to mention every other man that laid eyes on you these past few days. Those bags downstairs are full of things that don’t do your beauty justice. Set them free, Bella. Let them go home to thrift store heaven.”

Rose and I cracked up at the serious look on Alice’s face as she delivered my clothing’s eulogy. However, I couldn’t deny that I was treated differently since the wardrobe and makeup changes. Alice pulled out a picture from our Christmas party last year, handing it to me. Looking at the picture, I couldn’t help but feel embarrassed now at the way I looked then. Black bulky glasses, granny bun, and a tired looking, faded polyblend pantsuit that hung horribly, making me look old, and sad. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

“You’re right, Alice. You’ve shown me the light. I’m broken and I confess my fashion sins. Please, take me to the mall for the retail revival.”

I handed the picture back to her and made her promise never to speak of it again. Alice bounced up and down on my bed, rattling off stores we were going to visit today so fast, I just prayed I could keep up with her. Rose and Alice hugged me, and then went downstairs to make coffee while I showered and changed.

I came into the kitchen to the aroma of fresh coffee and found Alice and Rose standing behind Felicity, who was laying in front the door to the apartment, licking the back of Sebastian’s front leg, which was stuck under the door again.

“I think they’re in love,” I announced as I poured myself a cup of coffee. Sebastian stuck both of his paws under the door, and he and Felicity continuing to paw at each other playfully.

“Has there been anything else interesting going on behind this door?” Alice would ask that question. Unfortunately, other than some intense staring and some naughty dreaming, I had nothing to report. Yet.

“It’s not like that, Alice, he’s my tenant.” Then why was I grinning like a fat cat in an empty canary cage? Alice didn’t miss a thing, as usual.

“From that grin on your face I would say it is ‘like that’. You’re holding out on us, Bella!” I tried not to look at Alice, but it was no use. She knew me too well, and she wasn’t going to give up until I gave her something. I took a deep breath and tried to control my heart rate.

“Well, I did get an excellent view of him this morning in nothing but his boxers.” Alice and Rose both squealed at the same time, demanding details.

“There’s not much to tell. The cats were doing that this morning,” I pointed to Felicity, still playing with Sebastian’s feet, “And I walked in here and thought his cat’s foot was a mouse, so I started screaming. I woke him up and he freaked out, so I had to open the door to let him know I was ok and tell him what scared me. He was standing there in his thin little boxers while I explained. No big deal.”

“Wait a minute! Were you wearing that same tiny outfit you had on when we got here?” Alice was grinning now, obviously amused with the idea of me facing Edward in those blue almost-nothing-there pajama’s.

“Yeah. Why?” Wait for it. Here it comes…

“AAAAHHHHHHHGGGHHHH,” Alice and Rose both squealed again. “And what was his reaction?”

I put on my best innocent thoughtful face. “Well, I did seem to get a rise out of him.” I was able to get it out with a totally straight face, but inside I was on the floor. Alice was slumped over the table laughing so hard she was turning purple, and Rose looked like she was going to hyperventilate. “What?” I asked innocently.

They were getting up from their chairs and heading for the front door, each grabbing one of my arms on the way. They dragged me towards the door, still trying to catch their breath.

“Come on, Bella! We need to make sure you have a good supply of those ‘uplifting’ pajamas. Let’s go shopping!”

Edward

I spent the rest of the week watching Bella come and go from the hospital to check on Stephenie, constantly watched by every man within viewing distance of her, this of which she seemed to be totally oblivious. I took every opportunity I could get to have coffee or lunch with her, and we talked about any and everything. She had a calming effect on me and it helped my days pass much more pleasantly.

Dr. Black and Dr. Cheney were starting to wear on my nerves, however, following her around trying to make small talk, inviting her to lunch, dinner, their places, whatever they could think of to get her to go out with them. The more she said no, the more desperate they became. It was obvious they weren’t used to rejection, and if it wasn’t making me so mad it would actually be comical. Their attentiveness towards Bella was also thoroughly annoying the nurses who usually had their attention, so much so that they made faces behind Bella’s back when she went past them, but were careful not to be caught for fear of reprimand by the good doctors.

Today had been particularly hectic for me, with two young hiking victims flown in by Care Flight who had fallen down a sheer embankment, causing severe head injuries, among many others. Both surgeries were extensive and exhausting, and I made it home late, ready to fall into bed after I hung up my jacket, too tired to even thinking about finding dinner.

As I entered my bedroom, I found a note lying on the floor in front of the closet door:

Edward,

I missed you today! Looks like you’re having another late night. Just in case you didn’t get a chance to have dinner, I left you something in the closet.

Sweet dreams,

Bella

Sebastian was also lying in front of the closet door, running his nose back and forth along the gap at the bottom of the door, very intrigued with whatever was in the closet. I opened the door to find a meal fit for a king. There was a huge slice of homemade chocolate cake, a pile of homemade moist oatmeal raisin cookies, a thermos of homemade soup, a bottle of wine that had been opened for me, and a cooler bag with the biggest cold roast beef sandwich on homemade rye bread I had ever seen, along with a complete place setting, all sitting atop one of her Grammy’s tin TV trays. My god, she must have worked on this all day! I couldn’t help but grin. I was so touched by Bella’s thoughtfulness, my heart about leapt out of my chest.

I hadn’t realized how hungry I was due to the extreme fatigue weighing on me, but the smell of the cake and the sandwich sent me into a feeding frenzy any shark would have been proud of. After thoroughly gorging myself on some of the most delicious food I had ever eaten, I lay back on my bed, stomach full and contented. The only thing that would make this any more perfect would be if Bella was curled up here next to me. Well, a guy could dream.

I fell asleep with her on my mind and spent the next few hours dreaming about her, everything from incredibly sweet and tender to hot and erotic. However, I awoke from the last dream about Bella with a start, but this time my rapid breathing was from panic, not passion. Bella was surrounded by men, spinning in confused circles, trying to figure out which pair of arms she belonged in. I was running around the outside of the circle, trying to break through and get a place amongst the others where she could see me and come to me instead of one of them, but they kept shoving me back, closing the gaps where she couldn’t see me. One of them grabbed her, and Bella started screaming in terror at the hands pawing at her, a bloodcurdling sound that would wake the dead, which is exactly what it did.

Apparently, my cat was a dork, and the cause of all the commotion and Bella’s screaming. However, after she opened the closet door, I vowed to open a second can of cat food for him. Bella looked like she had also just rolled out of bed and her hair hung over her shoulders, long and messy, obscuring the spaghetti straps of the short cropped blue silk camisole top she wore over a pair of matching boy cut bottoms, exposing her creamy, flat stomach. I had forgotten I was only wearing a pair of thin boxers, and the sight of her caused me to respond immediately. She tried to act like she hadn’t noticed, but I was certain she had by the look on her face. I tried to discretely duck my lower half back behind my closet door, but she just grinned.

After asking what scared her, she pointed at Sebastian, who was still lying on the floor of my closet on his back looking up at us, unsure if he should move or not.

“Felicity was grabbing at something when I walked into the kitchen to make coffee and all I saw was a flash of fur, so I thought it was a mouse.” She knelt down and started scratching Sebastian’s huge belly, sending him into waves of loud, contented purring, and almost making me faint with the view of her full cleavage. “That’s what I get for coming down without my contacts in.”

Bella looked up at me, blushing a beautiful shade of pink. She stood up and yawned, raising her arms in a reaching stretch over her head and almost, oh, so almost, exposing more of her breasts than just the gentle curves under them. Uh oh, stay behind the door, Edward, it’s only getting worse. Breathe! Again!She’s killing me here! There was a loud knocking coming from behind her.

“Crap, I’ve got to run. Sorry again for waking you so early.” She picked Felicity up, leaving Sebastian looking like he had just lost his best friend. I feel your pain, buddy. More loud banging, and cursing sounded through the house this time, and Bella cringed. “I really have to get going. My friends just got here, and I’ll never hear the end of it that I’m not ready to go yet. Delaying those two from the stores is hazardous to my health.” She was about to close the door, when she turned back shyly. “Are you working all day today?”

She was so timid and sweet inviting me to go where I was already planning on going later, and the thought of getting to spend the rest of the day with her sharing some of the people I held most dear had me rushing around so I could hurry and get back to her.

Whatever this girl was doing to me, I was more than eager to go along for the ride.

Chapter: 5

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 5 – Gifts of the Heart

Bella

Shopping with Alice could best be described as trying to keep up with a ninja who was hunting with a credit card. In the space of three hours, we had been through twelve stores, and were loaded down with shopping bags. I bought enough beautiful new outfits, shoes, undergarments, and ‘uplifting’ pajamas to restock my wardrobe, at least for the fall. We all three bought new outfits for the party that afternoon, and planned to get ready at my house and go from there.

After a marathon session at the cosmetics counter to stock up on new makeup and products, and a quick run through accessories, we headed off to shop for the girls. Each of us purchased a birthday gift for Dorianne. We also went in together on a dollhouse for Abigail, a drawing desk and supplies for Marisol, and were planning to hit Icing for some jewelry and accessories for Madelyn and Stephenie on the way out of the mall.

We had just left the toy store when Rosalie spotted Fredericks of Hollywood. We stopped to stare in the window at a red barely there corset set with matching string thong and stockings. “I have to have that!” Rose squealed, heading into the store. Alice and I just shook our heads as we headed into the store next door to look around while Rose found what she wanted in Fredericks.

The tiny little store Alice and I entered was decorated like a ladies boutique from the turn of the century. All the clothes had a very vintage feel to them, which had me daydreaming of wildflowers, gossamer and tree swings. “Bella, look at this!” Alice’s eyes were wide with excitement as she held up an exquisitely beautiful ecru fitted night gown. It was made from a delicate, sheer pure cotton fabric, trimmed in a fine elaborately woven lace and ribbon piping, giving it an elegantly aged vintage look.

“That’s so beautiful, Alice. Jasper would love it, I’m sure!” I continued to look, gasping loudly as I reached right behind it to pull out another amazing gown. It was pure white, a work of soft sheer cotton perfection that swept to the floor and gathered lightly at the V shaped waistline, with intricate white embroidered trim. It was fitted across the bust with tiny mother of pearl buttons that fastened all the way up the front. Rows of small vertical pleats formed the bodice, and it was held up with narrow embroidered straps. It was the sweetest yet sexiest thing I had ever seen and I wanted to get it so badly, but it was over one hundred dollars, and I just couldn’t justify it. Who would I wear something like that for anyway?

Alice decided to get the gown she found, and headed for the cashier. “While I’m checking out, could you please go check on Rose and make sure she isn’t trying on things in front of the window again?” Alice’s thoughts seemed far away and I guessed she was either imagining Jasper’s reaction to her in the gown, or remembering the last time we were with Rose in Fredericks and one of the other customers almost broke her boyfriend’s nose for staring at Rosalie trying on bras in the aisle because all the dressing rooms were full and she was in a hurry. Remembering that day fondly, I hurried out of the store to go find Rose next door.

Rose was checking out also, and had an impressive pile of every kind of panties imaginable, plus a few bras that would make any man melt on contact. I could only imagine what she had planned for the two naughty nightie sets and two bottles of flavored warming gel.

The truth was, I really could only imagine. My sexual experiences with men were limited to a heavy make out session with my nerdy prom date that ended badly when I started my period unexpectedly, and a few dates with the late night adult channel, out of curiosity. My drab, matronly appearance had served as effective a barrier to attention from men as a large hairy mole on the end of my nose would have. The only person I ever confessed the secret of my virginity to was Alice, and I swore her to silence. I was a really vivid dreamer, however, so even though my body was still innocent, my subconscious was in training for porn film stardom.

We wrapped up our shopping and grabbed lunch quickly in the food court before heading back to my house. Jasper was waiting there for us with his pickup, and Alice had him load up the bags of my old clothes and take them to a nearby donation box. After a few more words of goodbye and good riddance were muttered under her breath for the dearly departed now loaded into the bed of Jasper’s pickup, Alice dragged us upstairs to get ready for the party.

We came out a while later to the sound of Jasper laughing and talking to someone like they were old friends. Both Jasper and Edward froze for a moment as we descended the stairs before Jasper composed himself enough to tease me. “Bella, you never told us you kept a spare man in your closet,” he laughed, pointing at Edward. Jasper explained that he heard something knocking in the kitchen and followed the sound, opening the closet door to find Edward there. He and Edward had met briefly at the hospital, so they were already acquainted. I introduced Edward to Alice and Rose, who looked at me, flashing smiles and a quick wink, letting me know they were impressed, and approved.

We decided to take two cars so everyone could leave whenever they wanted. Rose was meeting Emmett there and rode with Alice and Jasper. Since Edward knew where we were going, he led the way. The Cullen’s home was located just outside the city, about twenty five miles away, so we would have some time to talk on the way there.

“You look beautiful, by the way,” Edward said as we pulled out, looking at me with that breathtaking smile. “That happens to be my favorite color.” His eyes were taking in my outfit, lingering briefly at my breasts, unrestrained to accommodate my low backed sweater. I blushed as usual at his compliment and smiled back, suddenly feeling a little self conscious. I was still getting use to looking different, and having men appreciate it. I had picked a rich royal blue cashmere sweater with a low cut cowl back, and a short chocolate brown suede leather skirt and dark brown suede heels. Alice had swept my hair up in a soft twist, curling the overflow and tendrils around my face, allowing it to cascade down my neck and back in loose ringlets.

“Thank you. Rose helped me pick it out. She really has great taste.”

“I agree. And it goes beyond just clothing. She couldn’t have asked for a better guy than Emmett Cullen. I’m really happy for them. From what Emmett has told me so far, she’s pretty amazing, too.”

“She is. Speaking of the Cullen’s, you promised to tell me how you know them, remember?” I was curious to know more about him and the people in his life.

“I’ve known Esme and Carlisle all my life. Actually, Esme and my mother grew up living next door to each other and were together since they were born. Their mothers were best friends as well. Our ties go a long way back.”

I sat and listened intently as Edward told how his family and the Cullen’s were very close, as much as any biological family. His mother and Esme had always been together, sharing their lives as the closest of sisters would. Esme and Carlisle were actually his godparents, and Carlisle was one of the reasons he became a doctor. He was a bit emotional as he talked about how Esme cared for his mother during her battle with cancer, which she ultimately succumbed to a few years ago. She became like a second mother to him, holding him as he suffered through the loss of his parents, and helping him in every way a true mother would. Edward’s father, heartbroken at the loss of his lifetime sweetheart, followed her shortly. He said the doctors didn’t find anything conclusive, and ruled his death as ‘natural causes’. Edward believed his father just willed himself to join his beloved wife, whom he couldn’t bear to live without.

“Emmett’s my big brother basically. Esme and my mom raised us as siblings so we would always be close like they were. He taught me everything I know about baseball when we were kids, and he’s always been there for me, through the good and the bad. I love him as much as I would any natural brother.”

Edward slowed and turned off the main highway. The drive leading to the house was paved only with gravel, and fairly bumpy in spots. Several times I sensed Edward glancing over as we would hit a bump, enjoying the show going on in the front of my blouse. Feeling mischievous enough to play along, I leaned back and relaxed my arms, allowing full view and maximum bounce of my ample cleavage. If he tries to cut those eyes any sharper this way, he’s going to be looking at me through his ear, I laughed to myself.

The day couldn’t have been more perfect, with bright blue skies dotted with a few sparse, wispy puffs of clouds. It was cool, and the fall colors were at their peak, contrasting brightly against the vivid sky.

We pulled in front of a huge old house, and I stopped to take in the beauty of it all. The ancient trees surrounding the house were ablaze with color, and I couldn’t help but laugh at the number of chalk drawings on the pavers leading up to the front porch. In many ways, it was very much like my own beloved home, ancient and graceful; hinting at a time long ago when children ran through open fields chasing butterflies and everyone took turns cranking the handle of the homemade ice cream churn.

Marisol and Abigail came skipping around from the side of the house, a handled basket of apples carried between the two of them. From the looks of their overalls, they had been picking apples from the orchard in the back. Their eyes grew wide when they saw the pile of gifts we were unloading from the cars, and they dropped the basket and ran for the door, yelling for Madelyn to come and look.

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and led me towards the house. Esme came out on the porch to greet us with Dorianne on her hip, grinning at the two of us. The birthday girl was all dolled up in a pink corduroy jumper and a party hat, which she refused to take off. I reached out to her and she launched herself into my arms, throwing her tiny arms around my neck and slobbering on my cheek. Madelyn came to the door pushing Stephenie in a wheelchair. The swelling in her face had gone down dramatically, and some of the huge gauze pads had been replaced with bandages. She had on a floppy beret that covered most of her still-bald head and some of the bandages. She still had a lot of bruising around her cheek and eyebrow, but was looking much better than she did in the hospital.

Emmett came out to help bring in the gifts, but never took his eyes off Rosalie. Esme noticed, smiling and winking at Edward and me. We all piled into the large living room, stacking the gifts next to a beautiful grand piano. Edward brought a huge bouquet of pink roses for Esme, hugging her and congratulating her on finally getting her girls. Carlisle asked Edward to join him in his study for a moment while Esme led the rest of us into the family room.

“Wow! Is all that for Dorianne?” Abigail marveled at the amount of loot she assumed her little sister was about to receive.

“Not quite,” Alice chuckled. “I think I saw something there with your name on it.” Abigail’s eyes got even bigger as she tried to guess which box might be hers.

“Come on, girls, time for some party games,” Esme announced. The girls took turns playing a variety of children’s party games, even getting Emmett and Jasper to join in, much to our extreme amusement. When it was time to sing happy birthday to Dorianne, we all gathered back around the piano. Esme motioned for Edward to sit at the keys, and I watched as he smiled at me and sat, pouring out a rendition of the ‘Birthday Song’ worthy of Carnegie Hall. I stood there with my mouth open, awed by the brilliance of Edward’s talent.

“I have a special gift for you, little one,” Edward said, stroking Dorianne’s cheek gently as Esme sat her on the bench next to him. She looked up at him very much like I imagined I was looking at him myself. “I wrote this song especially in time for your birthday.” Edward began playing, and I fought back tears as the melody filled the room, sweet and complex, just like Edward.

As the music came to a close, we all stood, holding our breath, mesmerized by the beauty of what we had just heard. Edward pulled a CD case from his jacket pocket and handed it to Esme.

“I recorded it so you could play it for her when you put her to bed,” Edward smiled, putting his arm around Dorianne, who had stood up on the piano bench and was poking her finger in his ear. “It’s called Beauty’s Lullaby,” he smiled at her, kissing her on the cheek before handing her to Esme.

“Does anyone want cake and ice cream?” Esme asked, and was greeted positively by a chorus of enthusiastic little girls, almost as enthusiastic as Emmett. Esme and Madelyn had made Dorianne a beautiful pink birthday cake, and Esme bragged about how Madelyn was a natural with a pastry bag. The older girls served everyone cake and ice cream, and we all sat around eating and laughing at Dorianne who was in her high chair, merrily mashing a piece of cake into sticky wads before cramming it into her mouth. Carlisle was busy the whole time with the video camera, capturing everything for posterity.

As I looked around at my friends, I felt a wonderful sense of contentment. Edward was sitting close beside me, deep in thought as well as he watched. “What are you thinking about?” I whispered to him, causing him to smile. “You look like you’re a million years away.”

“I was just remembering times like this when I was a kid; thinking about family, and the future.” He looked at me, and for a brief moment I almost felt like I was looking into Poppa’s warm eyes again.

Cake and ice cream finished, the girls were anxious to get at the gifts. Jasper, Edward and Carlisle brought them in and passed them to the girls. Dorianne was not, as of yet, proficient in wrapping paper annihilation, so her sisters helped her, tearing through the wrappings like little human paper shredders. Alice and Jasper bought Dorianne a set of wooden learning puzzles and some books. Rosalie got her a dress up doll set, and I gave her a set of play food and dishes.

After helping Dorianne, the girls attacked their own packages, squealing with delight at their gifts. Marisol immediately began producing happy pictures for everyone in the room, and Stephenie and Madelyn giggled as they held up their necklaces, earrings, and bracelets to show how pretty they looked. Abigail dragged her doll house over into the corner and sat down, quietly talking to the little family figures as she arranged the pieces throughout the rooms.

Madelyn came and sat down next to Dorianne, taking her into her lap and unfolding a piece of paper from her pocket. The words she read to her little sister brought everyone in the room to tears:

Little one, so soft and small

What has this world taught us all?

That people leave and loved ones die

That little ones are meant to cry

Your tears are mine, I feel your grief

Though myself too young to give relief

But I’ll love you always

Though mom I can’t be

Always my baby you’ll be to me

Now God has smiled upon us here

And given us a family to hold us near

But as you grow, remember me

My precious baby you’ll always be.

Dorianne patted the tears on Madelyn’s cheeks, laughing at the mess she was making of her sister’s face. The years of pain and fear, worry and lonely desperation evident on Madelyn’s face the day her father died seemed to slowly be dissolving, melted away in her tears by the love and acceptance Esme and Carlisle were showering on her and her sisters, and relieving her of the responsibilities of parenthood she had been forced to shoulder for so long.

Rosalie, Alice, and I helped Esme get the girls upstairs and ready for bed. Esme had done an amazing job in a very short amount of time getting the girls rooms decorated. They were all beautifully furnished, and Dorianne’s nursery was a plethora of pinkness and frills, just like Esme had always wanted. Esme put Edward’s CD in, and Dorianne settled down immediately to listen, and was almost asleep when we slipped out of her room. Stephenie was still quite a bit weak and needed to rest, so Madelyn chose to go to bed as well to be with her.

We came back downstairs to find Carlisle and Emmett passing around glasses of champagne. They handed each of us a glass, and Carlisle offered a toast. “To parenthood. May you all know the joys of it one day soon.” Esme beamed over at Emmett as he and Rosalie looked at each other, lost in one another’s eyes.

“You know, Dorianne’s not the only one with a birthday this week,” Alice announced slyly, looking thoughtful. “I can think of someone else whose birthday is soon, and they probably haven’t even given it a thought.” Everyone turned and looked at me, smiling. I did a quick run through my mental calendar and realized Alice was right. My birthday was tomorrow. How unobservant was that? Actually, I tried not to think about it, as I didn’t like to admit getting older for one, and I also didn’t want anyone spending money on me for another. Rose disappeared for a minute, and then came back out carrying a small tiramisu, my favorite desert, with a candle on it, singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to me, everyone joining her.

“Alice, Rose, you guys are too much!” I groaned at them as they made me blow out the candle carefully so as not to blow coffee and cocoa powder everywhere.

Another pile of gifts had appeared while we were upstairs, and I was overwhelmed by everyone’s thoughtfulness. Alice handed me her gift first, bouncing up and down with excitement for me to open it. I recognized the logo on the box and looked at Alice in disbelief as I opened the lid to reveal the beautiful delicate white gown I had wanted so badly earlier in the day. As I lifted it gently out of the box, Edward caught his breath, looking at me with smoldering eyes. Slightly embarrassed, I slipped it back into the box, kissing Alice on the cheek and thanking her profusely.

I only thought I was embarrassed by Alice’s gift. After opening Rose’s, that was nothing. Rose had given me a white lace teddy with a matching sheer cover-up from Fredericks, along with a matching garter and a bottle of flavored warming lotion. Emmett and Jasper let out a low whistle, and Edward just looked stunned. Rose leaned over and whispered something to Emmett, which made him look like he was about to come undone, pulling a couch pillow into his lap.

Edward composed himself, and handed me a large, flat box. I opened it, and was at a loss for words when I pulled an antique avocado green tin tray table with gold trim out of the box. “I stopped in an antique shop next door to my barber the other day to kill some time before my appointment and saw this propped up against the back wall. It’s exactly like the ones my Gran had when I was a kid. I thought you might enjoy it.”

He smiled that smile that made me forget my name, and I threw myself into his arms, bursting into tears. “Hey, are you ok?” he asked, seeming concerned that maybe I didn’t like his gift.

“I’m perfect. This is so sweet, Edward. I love it! Thank you so much!” I hugged him closer, feeling his arms tighten around me. “You’ll have to come over so I can use it soon.”

“I’m counting on it, love,” he whispered, and I could feel him smiling against my neck, melting me against his chest. I’m sure he could feel my heart pounding as he held me there against him, not seeming like he wanted to let go of me anytime soon.

The evening wound to a close, and we all got ready to leave. Emmett had already left taking Rosalie home, and Jasper and Alice said goodnight and were out the door, leaving Edward and myself.

“Thank you so much for everything,” I hugged Esme and Carlisle. “We’re so blessed to have you in the foster program, and if you need anything, or any help with the girls, please don’t hesitate to call me.”

Esme hugged me again, “I should be thanking you, Bella, my dear. You’ve given me more in the past few days than I ever dreamed possible.” She looked over at Edward and then smiled at me knowingly. “Yes, more than you could possibly know.”

Edward shook Carlisle’s hand and then swept Esme up into a huge bear hug. She whispered something in his ear I couldn’t hear making him smile, and he nodded his head slightly and winked at her, agreeing with whatever she had said. We said goodnight and headed home.

We rode home in comfortable silence. My arm had been resting on the center armrest, and Edward wrapped his over mine, taking my hand in his. “Thank you,” he said softly.

“For what?” I asked, confused.

“For just being you,” he said. “For caring enough to do a job a lot people couldn’t do for long without either becoming jaded and hard after seeing so much pain and suffering, or just giving up and walking away because it’s too much. I admire you, and you inspire me.”

His words brought on a fresh round of tears. I did have days when I didn’t think I would be able to look at one more broken child; when I couldn’t take the baby out of one more mother’s arms, unfit or not. I had days when I questioned my faith, my God, and myself as a human being, wondering how beings made by what I believed to be a loving, forgiving God could do what they did to the most helpless of us.

Seeing the children tonight at the Cullen’s reminded me of why I do what I do; because there are good people, caring and loving people, willing to step up and make up for the shortcomings of the other ones. And because there are children like Madelyn, who, by no fault of their own, are raising their siblings or other relative’s children because they’re the only one’s competent enough to do it even at their young ages. I do it for them. They made the insanity of my job bearable, and at times, even enjoyable.

I looked over at the beautiful man sitting next to me and smiled. “You’re pretty amazing yourself. I didn’t know you played piano like that. When did you have time to make that CD?” I asked, not remembering hearing any music coming from his apartment. He laughed and my heart melted again.

“I used the piano in the chapel at the hospital during my breaks,” he grinned at the thought. “The acoustics in there are great, and I think the chaplain is now a lifelong fan. He thanked me more than once for saving him from severe boredom. I do have a baby grand piano of my own, but I have it in storage right now because I have no where to put it until I get around to buying a house.” I remembered how small the apartment really was and felt bad that something so dear to him was unavailable to him whenever he felt like using it. With that thought, I had a stroke of inspiration.

“How would you like to get your piano out of storage?” I asked, a mischievous grin crossing my face as I had to control myself from bouncing in my seat.

“Where would I put it?” he asked, confused.

“In the parlor of the house.” I looked over at him, a smile spreading across his face as the thought of being able to get to his beloved piano made him almost glow.

“Are you sure? Do you have room?” He was so excited now he was actually fidgeting like a little boy getting an early Christmas present.

“Grammy always wanted a baby grand piano in the house, and she had even made a space in the parlor for one by selling her old upright. Poppa was going to get her one, but passed away before he was able to get it for her. After he died, she really didn’t feel like playing much anymore. I think she mostly played for Poppa. She had the old upright for years and even taught lessons on it for a while. She was pretty good and really loved to play. It would have been amazing to see her sitting at one in her parlor, a dream come true for her.”

“Are you sure it wouldn’t be in your way?” he asked, trying to contain his excitement.

“It would honor our home to have it there.” As I said that, something flashed across his face, an emotion I wasn’t sure of.

“If you’re sure, I’ll arrange to have it brought out of storage and delivered to the house immediately. Thank you, Bella. You have no idea what this means to me.”

“Nothing would please me, or Grammy and Poppa, more.” Looking in his eyes now, I was certain of that.

Edward

I hurried through my rounds at the hospital and made it out in just enough time to stop by the florist, then get home and change. I was on my way home when my cell phone rang.

“Edward, you’re still coming, right?” Emmett’s booming voice made me need to move the phone away from my ear. “Rose’s going to be there, bro. I want you to meet my future wife,” he chuckled.

“Confident much, Emmett?” I laughed. They had barely dated and he was already convinced it was love. Knowing Emmett, it was probably more that he was in serious lust.

“I wouldn’t miss it. By the way, I’ll be coming with someone myself. Her name is Bella Swan and she’s my new landlady, turns out.” I could hear Emmett laughing..

“Bella Swan? No kidding! Hey, man, that’s awesome. I met her at the hospital during the Crowley incident. She’s a total babe. Hey, Rose said she and her friend, Alice, were planning to surprise Bella with an impromptu birthday part as well. Hope you got time to get her something, bro.”

I smiled, remembering my walk through an old antique store two days ago. I didn’t realize her birthday was coming up, so I was glad I went in there. “I already have something, and I think she’ll like it.” At least I hoped she would. And if I was lucky, I would get to share a few good meals on it with Bella.

I hung up from Emmett and made it home quickly, showering and changing as fast as I could. I wrapped Bella’s gift and hid it in the trunk of my car before going back in, trying to control my excitement at seeing Bella again. I thought about trying the knob, but didn’t want to risk scaring her or appearing too pushy, so I knocked like a proper gentleman. I was surprised to be greeted by Dr. Jasper Whitlock.

“Hello, is Bella home?” I asked sheepishly, a little embarrassed to be standing in a closet speaking with a colleague. He motioned for me to come on through, laughing as I had to push Sebastian back with my foot to keep him from running into Bella’s kitchen with Felicity. Jasper and I had met briefly at the hospital while he was there visiting a CPS ward who had been hospitalized. He seemed amused to find me in the closet, but I quickly explained the situation and we both had a good laugh.

“She’s upstairs being tortured by the Primp Patrol. They should be down any time.” I followed Jasper into the living room to wait for the girls. “So, how are you enjoying Seattle?” Jasper asked as he handed me a glass of lemonade.

“Much better these days,” I grinned, glancing at the staircase. My life had most certainly taken a turn for the better since Bella and I had become friends.

Jasper noticed my sheepish grin and laughed. “I can imagine. She’s a special one, that Bella. If I wasn’t totally in love with my Alice, I would definitely be knocking on her door. She is truly beautiful, inside and out.”

The girls came down from getting ready just then, and the sight of Bella took my breath away. She looked like a Grecian goddess, the way her hair was piled up and cascading down around her graceful neck. The blue sweater she was wearing hugged every womanly curve of her body and framed her delicate pale skin deep down her back. The brown suede skirt she wore was perfect; short enough to be interesting, but still long enough to be respectable.

“Edward, I’d like you to meet my two best friends and colleagues, Rosalie Hale and Alice Brandon.”

I could see why Emmett was so excited. Rosalie was breathtakingly beautiful, but she was not my type. I had a thing for brown eyed brunettes. Alice was tiny and bounced lightly into Jasper’s arms. They way they looked at each other spoke volumes about their love for each other. It was almost too intense to watch for very long without feeling intrusive.

We headed out toward the Cullen’s house, and I couldn’t help but comment on how beautiful Bella looked. She seemed flattered, but unsure of herself. She reminded me I had promised to tell her about my connection to the Cullen’s, and I told her about the lifelong friendship between my family and Esme’s, and that Carlisle and Esme were my godparents. Telling her about my mom’s battle with cancer was difficult, and I remembered how wonderful Esme had been to come and stay with my mom and take care of her so I could continue to go to school. Dad’s death shortly after made for one of the longest and hardest years of my life. I was so thankful I had the Cullen’s to help me get through those days.

Keeping an eye on the road the whole way there was hard, to say the least. Bella was amply endowed, and it became apparent very quickly that she wasn’t wearing a bra. The movement of her breasts was mesmerizing, but I tried not to stare at her like some kind of pervert, but every time we hit a bump in the road, her breasts would bounce provocatively under the blue cashmere, and it was all I could do to keep my eyes on the road. When we turned off the main highway onto the Cullen’s driveway, I had to practically lock my head in place to keep from watching the continuous bouncing that was driving me insane with desire, and my knuckles ached by the time I pulled in front of the house from gripping the steering wheel so hard in order to keep my hands to myself to maintain control.

I wrapped my arm around Bella’s waist and she leaned into me as we made our way up to greet Carlisle and Esme with hugs and kisses. Carlisle looked at me thoughtfully for a moment before smiling to himself, deep in thought. Once we were inside, Carlisle pulled me briefly into his study. “I’m glad you could make it, Edward. Esme was worried you’d get caught up with work and not show.”

“You know me too well, Carlisle. However, I have a feeling my days of staying there past what’s necessary may be coming to an end. I think I may have a reason to spend more time at home these days,” I grinned and Carlisle smiled knowingly at me.

“She seems like an amazing girl, Edward. Quite beautiful, too. You should have seen her with the Crowley children at the hospital. She’s a natural at her job. Hearts like hers are a treasure to hold,” he smiled kindly. “She reminds me of two of my favorite women in the whole world. Esme and your mother.”

The smile on my face when Carlisle said that couldn’t have been bigger. “I know what you mean, Carlisle. That was one of the first things I thought of during our dinner together the other night.” Carlisle raised an eyebrow at me, and I explained about our impromptu dinner after discovering Bella was my landlady. He smiled and nodded to himself, then sat down and pulled a small box from his desk, handing it to me. “What’s this?” I asked

“It’s from your father. He gave it to me to give to you whenever I thought you were ready for it. After seeing the look in your eyes when you look at each other, I think you soon will be.”

I heard Emmett’s booming laughter coming from the front room, so I placed the box in my pocket and Carlisle and I walked back out to where the girls were busy trying to hang a donkey tail on Emmett. He was mock pleading for Rose’s help, but she was laughing and shaking her head watching Emmett being tackled by Marisol and Dorianne. Esme was watching with pleased interest at the interaction between him and Rosalie. I could practically hear her counting the grandchildren as she watched them.

The kids played a few more games, including an in-house game of hide and seek, where Emmett and Jasper actually joined in. It was hysterical to watch two grown men playing like they were in grade school again.

“I can’t believe the little ninja found me!” Emmett groaned as Marisol dragged him by the finger back to the living room. “How did you know I was hiding under the bed, squirt?” I wasn’t even sure how he managed to squeeze under there in the first place, and was even more amused that he would even try.

Marisol put her tiny hands on her hips and shook her head at Emmett. “Duh, BB, everybody hides there. You aren’t very smart, are you?” I thought Carlisle was going hyperventilate he was laughing so hard, and Rose was positively vibrating from repressed giggles. The girls had taken to calling Emmett “BB” for short. It was way too cute.

“Yeah, BB,” Jasper jabbed. Emmett, being the mature man he was, stuck his tongue out at Jasper, causing laughter to erupt from everyone and Esme to scold him.

Esme announced it was time to sing happy birthday to Dorianne. I played the familiar song while everyone sang, and then played the song I had composed for her birthday. I had spent many of my lunch breaks and several hours between surgeries the past few days camped out in the hospital chapel to compose the song for Dorianne, but the true inspiration for the song was really Bella. She inspired me like no other person ever had, and the melody flowed out, warm and beautiful, just like her.

While we were having cake and ice cream with the kids, the feeling of family was so strong, I couldn’t help but long for one of my own, to play for my children, and teach them to play as well. Memories of childhood celebrations with the Cullen’s flooded my thoughts, and memories of my parents during these happy times made me wistful.

I was already feeling somewhat emotional in my thoughts, but when Madelyn tenderly recited the poem she had written for her little sister’s birthday, I lost it. Hearing those sweet words of sisterly love made me glad I had followed Carlisle’s lead and decided to work with children. They were truly where the spirit shined the brightest.

The girls went up with Esme to help get the kids to bed, and we slipped our gifts for Bella in while they were upstairs. Emmett pulled me aside and elbowed me in the ribs, grinning like a madman. “Rose told me she got her something really special, but I’m not allowed to tease her about it,” he chuckled. I looked at him and laughed.

“Then you’d better behave yourself. I get the feeling Rose means business.” She was beautiful, but something told me there was brawn behind that beautiful threat.

“Well, it’s from Fredericks of Hollywood, so I probably won’t have to say a word. Rose said she’s shy and a bit of a prude, so she’ll probably do it all for me.” My brain was still stuck on the words Fredericks of Hollywood when the girls came back down and rejoined us.

Bella had to be reminded it was almost her birthday, which I found amusing, and quite frankly, refreshing. Most of the women I had dated started weeks in advance of their big day, dropping hints to downright making demands. Not Bella.

As she pulled the gift Alice had given her from the box, I gasped, imagining seeing her in that gown, standing in the kitchen. It was exquisitely detailed and very elegant, like a gown one would see in a trousseau. However, when she opened Rosalie’s gift, I was speechless. The image of Bella in that one immediately made my jeans tighten. Whatever Rosalie whispered to Emmett, it apparently had the same effect on him. I could vaguely hear her whisper something about ‘same style, different color and flavor’ to Emmett, but I wasn’t sure. I was sure he would tell me tomorrow, though, in more details than I cared to hear.

I composed myself, and then gave her my gift. Her reaction took me by surprise, but I was more than happy to have her in my arms. The smell of her hair and the feel of her warmth under my hands set me on fire, and I hugged her closer, breathing her in, not wanting to let her go. She whispered to me that she would have to have me over soon to use the tray. She had no idea what that did to me. My heart pounded fast and hard in my chest as I told her I was counting on it. I could feel her pulse pounding against my cheek, letting me know she was as affected as I was.

As we were getting ready to leave, I shook hands with Carlisle and he nodded to me, glancing at Bella and smiling. I gave Esme a huge hug. “This one’s special, Edward, don’t let her get away,” Esme whispered to me. I smiled and nodded, agreeing with her and letting her know I wouldn’t. I had no intentions of losing her. We had only known each other a very short time, but I already sensed that she was going to be a permanent fixture in my life.

In the car on the way home, I had to be touching her, so I took her hand in mine and told her how I admired her for doing the job she did, and how she inspired me. And she did inspire me, so much. I wanted to write symphonies for her, and songs that told the world just how incredible she was. When she offered to make my piano accessible to me again, willing to embrace one of my biggest passions in life, I felt like I was looking into the face of an angel. I knew then that someday I would write those things for her, my angel.

Chapter: 6

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 6 – Music to My Ears

Bella

This past weekend was so much fun. The party at the Cullen’s was wonderful, and the drive home with Edward gave us time to talk and plan for the delivery of his piano to the house. I invited him to come in and look at the parlor to make sure the piano would fit, which he determined it would if we rearranged a few pieces of furniture.

One of the pieces in the parlor that had been my grandparents pride and joy was their old Victrola. It was ancient, but still worked beautifully. Being the quintessential music enthusiast, Edward was fascinated by it, so we played one of Grammy’s old Glen Miller records. The opening notes of ‘Moonlight Serenade’ began, and Edward held his hand out to me, taking me in his arms for a slow dance around the parlor. “It’s been a long time since I danced with someone able to really appreciate this era of music,” Edward smiled down at me. As I swayed in his arms, warm memories of watching Grammy and Poppa dance to this same song came flooding back to me, causing my ever-ready tears to overflow.

“I had very good teachers. My grandparents wore the rug thin in here on a regular basis to these old records. They’re the reason I can dance at all and love this type of music.” He seemed to sense my emotions, and pulled me closer to him.

“You miss them so much, don’t you?” he said, smiling tenderly at me. The way he was looking at me told me he understood my strong bond with them, and how much I loved them.

“They were everything to me. They taught me so much, loved me when I didn’t think anyone else did, and left me with memories I’ll always cherish. I so wish they could be here right now, dancing with us,” I whispered, laying my head on his shoulder.

“I’m not so sure they’re not,” he smiled at me, glancing around the room. “I feel them, don’t you?”

He was right. If I closed my eyes, it was like they were swaying next to us, watching us and smiling. Edward put on another record, ‘I’m Gettin’ Sentimental over You’, and we continued to dance in the soft light of the parlor. As the song came to an end, Edward pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead, wrapping both arms tightly around me.

“Thank you for the dance, dear lady,” he whispered softly in my ear. “May I have one more?”

“It would be my pleasure,” I smiled at him and turned to put on ‘Stardust’, which had been one of Grammy’s favorites.

“You’re an extraordinary dancer. Where did you learn to dance like this?” I asked, dying to know who had been the lucky lady to spend so much time in his arms helping him perfect his technique.

“My grandmother loved to dance as well, and thought all proper gentlemen should know how to treat a lady on the dance floor,” he grinned, making my knees go weak. “We spent hours every Sunday afternoon in her kitchen dancing to these same old songs, and she taught me every step she knew. She was quite the dancer. Tomorrow would have been her birthday, same as yours.” I looked up at him, and he was trying very hard to keep the moisture in his eyes from escaping to his cheeks as well. He hugged me up close and let out a little chuckle. “She would have loved you. She meant the world to me. You actually remind me of her a lot,” he said, remembering something that made him smile. Was he saying I meant the world to him, too?

“I had better let you get some sleep. It’s late,” he said, glancing at the grandfather clock in the corner. We walked through to the kitchen, and stopped in front of the closet door. He took my hands and kissed the back of each one before pulling me into another embrace. “Sleep well,” he whispered in my ear, and then disappeared through the closet door into his apartment. I closed the door, again not setting the deadbolt. I went to bed and danced the night away with Edward in my dreams.

I woke up early Sunday morning to the sound of thunder and heavy rain pounding the roof. The sun wasn’t up yet, but the sound of the storm had me fully awake, and I realized I was cold and starving. I made my way downstairs and flipped on the heat, then moved into the kitchen to put on coffee. I decided to treat myself with an old fashioned breakfast since it was my birthday after all, complete with homemade blueberry pancakes, sausage, bacon, eggs, homemade biscuits and gravy, and hash-browned potatoes. Sometimes a girl just needed to feast.

As I worked on preparing my breakfast, I saw a familiar red paw patting the floor from under the door to the closet, looking for Felicity. She must have heard him from the other room, because she came skidding into the kitchen, plowing face first into the door across the hardwood floor. I couldn’t help but laugh watching the two of them play, seeing how excited Felicity got when she heard him meowing under the door. I couldn’t stand watching them being separated any longer, so I silently turned the knob on the closet door and pulled it open, inviting Sebastian to come into the kitchen. He stood up and sniffed the air, then cautiously stepped through the doorway.

I closed the door quietly and then watched as Sebastian sauntered around the kitchen, smelling and rubbing on everything as Felicity followed him, rubbing up against him and nuzzling him with her head. I gave them each a strip of bacon, and they sat down together, crunching happily on their treats.

The delicious smells of breakfast filled the kitchen. Everything else was ready, and I was almost finished making the pancakes, when I heard a knock on the closet door. I looked down, remembering I was only wearing a night shirt and a thong, but everything was covered, so I answered the door.

“Good morning,” Edward smiled. “Have you, per chance, seen a very large red cat? He doesn’t seem to be here as I didn’t wake up with my usual crushing chest pain this morning.” I laughed and pointed behind me to where Sebastian and Felicity sat, finishing their bacon slices. “I think I’m hurt,” Edward faked a sniffle. “You invited my cat to breakfast and didn’t bother to invite me.”

I slapped him on the shoulder playfully as I handed him a cup of coffee and motioned him towards the table to sit down. I watched him as he passed me, enjoying how his messy hair and bare shoulders looked in the dim light now coming through the kitchen window. His thin flannel sleep pants didn’t hide the fact that his backside was tight and firm. Get your eyes off his butt, Bella.

I turned back to the stove and finished the pancakes and eggs while Edward poured us another cup of coffee. The biscuits finished as well, and I took them out of the oven, leaving it on to bake some bread later and help keep the kitchen warm. As we settled to eat, I asked, “Where do you work out?”

“I have a folding personal fitness station. With the schedule I keep, I could never make it to a club during regular hours, so I have to do what I can when I’m home.” He smiled at me as he looked up to see me, fork poised in mid air, staring at his chest and abs. Blushing, I shoved a bite of pancake in my mouth, trying to keep my eyes on my plate. “Do you work out? You seem to be fairly fit,” he grinned, “At least from what I saw of you in that outfit you were wearing the other morning.” I blushed, but giggled at the way he wiggled his eyebrow at me.

“I do a couple of workout tapes and I speed walk most mornings when it’s not totally pouring like this morning. A little rain or drizzle I can handle, but this is a bit much.” I pointed out the window as the torrential rains pounded the foggy pane. “I wanted to get one of those home gyms myself to get in some strength training, but it just hasn’t been in my budget.”

Edward got a huge smile on his face as he thought of something. “Well, I have an offer for you. Since you’re being so wonderful to let me bring my piano into your house, how would you like to come over and use my fitness station? I would be happy to show you how to use it and be your personal trainer.”

“That would be so great! Ok, you’ve got a deal!” His smile was mesmerizing, and I couldn’t help but stare at him as the thought of being near him all hot and sweaty made my heart rate accelerate wildly. I composed myself and began clearing the table, running water in the sink for the dishes. One of these days, I was definitely going to get a dishwasher installed in this kitchen. However, as Edward moved beside me to start rinsing and drying, I figured I could just wait on that one.

As I reached for the skillet I used to cook the bacon, I hadn’t realized the pan had gotten so hot from the heat rising through the oven vent. I let go of it quickly as it burned my hand and the pan bounced on the stove top, splashing hot grease down the front of my shirt and over my arm.

Edward was beside me in a flash, quickly and carefully removing the shirt over my head to get the hot grease away from my body and pulled me to the sink to run my arm under the cold water. He got a dish towel and soaked it in cold water, pressing it to the burned spots on my breast and stomach. I was so distracted by the pain from my burns that it took a minute for it to dawn on me that I was standing there, almost naked, except for the little blue thong I was wearing. Edward had disappeared through the closet door, and was coming back through with a first aid kit in his hand when he stopped, staring at me for a second, before he came back to me and began treating my burns.

“It’s a good thing I’m a doctor or this could be really awkward right now,” he grinned at me as he smoothed burn ointment on my breast, covering it with a square of gauze and tape before moving to the burn on my stomach. “I suppose it’s fitting I get to see your birthday suit since it’s your birthday today,” he smiled cheekily and winked at me. “Happy birthday, by the way.”

“Thanks, I think.” I couldn’t help but smile back. “I feel really stupid,” I said, blushing at my predicament. “Looks like my clumsiness strikes again.”

He continued to work on my burns, finishing with the one on my arm. “This one’s the worst. I think it’s probably going to blister. We’d better keep an eye on it,” he said as he placed the last bandage on my arm.

“Thank you,” I said, thankful he was here. “This would have been so much worse by myself.” Somehow, standing there almost completely nude in front of Edward began to feel less unnatural. I found myself feeling almost at ease.

“As much as I’m enjoying the view, maybe you ought to go find a new outfit,” he said, smiling at me as he was closing up his first aid kit. “Unless you’d rather just stay like that. Either way’s fine with me.”

“Well, it is a little chilly in here,” I laughed as goose bumps rose on my skin, and my nipples stood at attention.

“I can see that,” he grinned as he surveyed my breasts, and then wrapped me into a warm embrace. As our bare chests met, I could feel that I wasn’t the only one having a hard time this morning.

“I’ll be right back.” I pulled away from him and left the kitchen, knowing he was watching me walk away. I so wanted to take his hand and lead him upstairs with me, but I knew it was still too soon, and I wanted to do things right with him.

I returned to find the kitchen cleaned and everything put away. He had done the dishes and cleaned up the grease spill, and was just draining the sink when I came back in.

“You didn’t have to do all of this,” I looked around at the spotless kitchen, “But thank you, just the same.”

“Hey, I got breakfast and a show. It’s the least I could do,” he laughed. “So, what’s on the agenda for the rest of the day? I’m off today, so I’m at your disposal, that is, if you want me around.” He flashed me the cutest puppy dog eyes, and I couldn’t resist throwing my arms around him for another hug.

“I told you, you’re welcome anytime to be here. Besides, I’m going to be working around that fire breathing dragon today, so having a doctor on hand could be useful,” I giggled as I pointed at my ancient stove. I hadn’t really planned on doing anything other than some housework and baking today, considering the weather. “I was going to make some bread and stuff actually. As you noticed earlier, it’s kind of chilly and running that old monster of a stove really warms the place up.” I thought for a moment before asking, “Are you any good with bread dough?”

His laughter filled the kitchen as he seemed to remember something funny. “When I was little, my mom and Gran used to make homemade bread every weekend, enough for us all for the whole week. Kneading was my job when I got big enough to do any good. It’s one of my fondest memories of my times in the kitchen with them,” he said, looking at me again with emotion in his eyes.

We spent the day up to our elbows in flour and bread dough. Edward had a wonderful kneading technique; he looked like a professional baker the way he handled the dough and the flour. When the bread was baked, it had a grain I had never been able to achieve on my own. We also made thumbprint cookies, getting into a smearing fight when I accidentally spilled warm melted sweet chocolate on the back of his hand. Laughing hysterically, we started cleaning up.

“Hold still, you have some on your jaw,” I said as I pulled his face down to mine, slowly licking the chocolate smear. His breathing picked up, and he pulled me in front of him.

“I guess I had better get that smear off your neck then.” He pulled me to him and latched on to my neck, sucking and licking at the chocolate smear on the front of my throat. I started to tremble and my knees gave way as he held me up, working his way down to the dots of chocolate on my collarbone, and between my breasts.

“I never knew baking could be so stimulating,” he whispered in my ear in a ragged voice, and then licked the chocolate smudge next to my mouth. I stuck my finger in the bowl of melted chocolate, painting it on his lips, then on mine, sticking the chocolate coated finger in my mouth and sucking on it. Edward caught his breath, his eyes locked with mine, smoldering.

“I think we both missed a spot.” We came together, slowly licking each other’s lips as our clean-up efforts developed into a passionate, messy kiss.

“I never thought chocolate could get any better,” I said breathlessly as we finally came up for air. “I’ll have to remember this next time I have a craving.”

“Same here,” he grinned. “And if I have a chocolate craving, I’ll come find you, too.” We finished cleaning up and then made sandwiches on the homemade bread for dinner, retreating to the living room to eat and talk. When we finished, he asked if I wanted to watch a movie.

“I would love to, but my DVD player is on the fritz.” I was disappointed, but he offered a solution.

“We could take it over to my side, mine’s working fine. What’s your favorite movie?”

“I love ‘Ghost’ with Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. I always have a good cry at the end.”

“That’s one of mine, too. Ok, Ghost it is,” he said as he held my hand, leading me to the closet door. “Sebastian, are you coming?” Sebastian just looked at him with one eye, and then laid his head back down against Felicity’s belly, going back to sleep.

“He’ll be fine here. He’s already found Felicity’s litter box, so I think he already feels at home. Look at them, they’re so cute together.” We laughed at the two huge cats cuddled up together in a mound of tangled legs and fur, both sound asleep in Felicity’s basket.

“That actually looks like fun,” Edward said as he grinned at me. “We should try that sometime.” I blushed at the thought, grinning back at him.

Edward found the movie and put it in the DVD player in his room, then piled up on his bed and patted the mattress next to him for me to join him. I stood there a moment, looking at him and trying to decide if this was the wisest idea. I knew I was beginning to feel more for him than just a friend, or even a boyfriend, but I wasn’t sure what he felt about me, and I certainly didn’t want to become just another conquest. Somehow, deep inside I knew that would never be the case with Edward, so I joined him on his bed.

The opening credits of the movie were still rolling when Edward’s phone rang. He groaned as he got up to answer it, not wanting to leave the position we had just gotten into, with him snuggled up to my back with his arm around my waist. He grabbed his cell phone and came back to bed, repositioning himself behind me before answering the call. I paused the movie so he could hear, and then I could hear Emmett’s booming, excited voice on the other end of the conversation.

“Edward, man, you would not believe what I’ve been doing for the last twenty four hours!” Emmett said, almost breathless. “I just dropped Rose off at home, but I sure as hell didn’t want to leave her there after the night we had. Man, I think I’m in love!”

Edward leaned in close to me so I could hear the conversation with Emmett, both of us giggling silently. “So, Emmett, tell me all about it,” Edward said, as I turned on my other side to face him so I could better hear the conversation.

“You won’t believe what an animal that woman is in bed,” Emmett said, almost reverently. “She can twist her body into positions I never knew a woman could get into. We did it in positions even I’ve never tried, and you know me, bro! I’ve tried just about everything.”

I felt kind of awkward listening in on their conversation, so not wanting to insult or embarrass Emmett, I tried to back away, but Edward pulled me back against him. “Emmett, Bella’s here with me, do you mind if she’s in on the conversation?” Edward asked, as he reached down and hitched my leg up over his hip, startling me as his hand cupped my thigh.

“No, man, that’s cool. Hey, Bella!” Emmett boomed over the phone. “Anyway, where was I…?”

“You were telling us what you and Rose were doing…” Edward had starting saying before Emmett cut in.

“Oh, yeah. Well, after we left the party, we went back to Rose’s for a nightcap. She’s got this great couch with a chase lounge thing, and we sat down and started talking, and the next thing I knew, we were in the middle of a tickling match.” Edward had pulled me closer and was running his hand up and down my back now. He slipped his fingers under my shirt and ran them up and down my ribs, making me squirm against him as the tickling became more intense. I tried to muffle my giggles, but it was becoming increasingly difficult.

“One thing led to another, and then we had clothes flying all over the place. She ripped my shirt right off my body, man. It was awesome!” Emmet almost whispered. “She had me about ready to scream, then stopped and headed for the bedroom, saying she would call me when she was ready for me. I about died right there, bro. If heaven had called for me, I wouldn’t have gone because I had it already waiting for me on the other side of that bedroom door…” The modest side of me wanted to stop listening, but the curious side of me wanted to hear all of it in graphic detail. Edward was still tickling me, but his hand stopped and froze in place.

“You remember that little white number Rose gave Bella for her birthday? Rose has the same one, except in black. She came out of the bedroom in it with a bottle of that lotion in her hands, motioning for me to come to her bedroom.” Emmett was sounding more and more worked up remembering his night with Rose. “The things we did, man, they should be illegal. Actually, I think some of them are in some states. Bella, I hope you don’t make my buddy there wait too long to see you in yours!” Edward was looking at me with a mischievous grin; I was just turning all shades of red from embarrassment.

“Oh, man, I can’t take this. I’ve got to go find Rose. I’ll call you tomorrow.” And with that, Emmett was gone, presumably to go find Rose for a repeat performance of last night. Edward hung up the phone, and then pulled me into a tight embrace.

“Not until you’re ready,” he whispered, kissing my neck, working his way to my mouth for another passionate, deep kiss.

“Thank you. And when I am, you’ll be the first to know.” We resumed our previous positions and restarted the DVD player. He pulled the covers up around us and we settled in, snuggled together. Neither of us made it very far into the movie and soon we were both sound asleep.

I was awakened from the best night’s sleep I had had in, I couldn’t remember how long, to the scurrying of little feet across my legs as Sebastian and Felicity chased each other around the room and back through the closet into the kitchen, meowing and trilling at each other as they went. Edward had been trampled in the same manner, rising up to throw a pillow at them as they leapt off the bed and took off again.

“Good morning!” I said, stretching and yawning. Great! My first time to sleep with a man and that’s all I did, I thought, laughing. However, when I looked over at Edward I could tell something was definitely wrong.

Edward

The weekend had been incredible. Dancing with her in the parlor last night brought back amazing memories of the times I spent with my grandmother learning how to dance. She always told me the woman I would one day marry would appreciate the old songs and love to dance to them like she did. I was beginning to wonder if my grandmother was a fortune teller.

Breakfast this morning was incredible, even if it did end a little rough. When I saw Bella being burned by the grease, the doctor in me kicked in. It wasn’t until I came back with the first-aid kit and saw her standing there, practically nude, that the man in me responded. She was even more beautiful than I remembered from the other morning in her blue pajamas, firm, yet curvy in all the right places. I had to recompose myself to treat her burns without acting like a pervert. Not that I didn’t want to, mind you.

When she came back from dressing and invited me to spend the day baking with her, my heart soared. Baking was another one of the things I did with my mom and Gran when I was a kid, and I loved it. We would spend endless hours mixing and kneading, Gran teaching us both her secrets for perfect bread. I felt like I was home.

The chocolate fight was fun, and I’ll never be able to eat it again without grinning, remembering how it tasted as I sucked it off her sweet skin. If I didn’t feel like crap right now, I’d be considering looking for the chocolate syrup…

However, shivering violently was not my idea of the most pleasant way to wake up, yet here I was, teeth rattling like castanets, and I felt like death warmed over. Sometime during the night, I was hit by what I assumed to be the flu from the way I felt. I was careful not to wake Bella, she was sleeping so peacefully, but I felt like hell. I managed to drag myself up in time to make it to the bathroom before the double-ended whammy hit me. Nothing like diarrhea and vomiting to start off a cold and rainy Monday morning, I thought to myself. I had been looking forward to waking with Bella in my arms, but this put a damper on that. Man, this sucks!

Bella was waking up thanks to the cat’s mad dash across the bed, and as she bid me good morning and looked at me, she could tell I was sick.

“Edward, what’s wrong?” Bella asked, concern in her voice as she touched my hot forehead. “You’re pale and burning up with fever. It looks like you’re sick!”

“That’s an understatement, darling,” I managed to croak out before having to run for the bathroom again.

When I came out, Bella was setting one of her Grammy’s trays beside the bed loaded with tissues, crackers, Gatorade, and a bottle of fever reducer. I crawled back into bed and she pulled the covers up around my shivering body before laying a moistened cloth across my forehead. She checked my temperature with an ear thermometer, looking at me shaking her head.

“You have a fever of one hundred and three degrees, Edward. You’re not going anywhere today, and neither am I.” She went back through the closet and I heard her on her phone talking to Rosalie.

“Rose, I won’t be in today,” she said. “No, I’m fine, it’s Edward. He’s burning up with fever and really sick,” she continued. “Yeah, I’ll be here all day if you need me. Bye”

She came back through the closet, sitting on the bed next to me, smiling and pulling her legs up, resting her chin on her knees. “I cleared it with Rose so I can stay home and take care of you, so don’t think you’re lifting a finger to do anything. I’m your nurse for today,” she said, grinning from something she was thinking.

“It’s too bad I feel so rotten. That could be fun if you had the costume to go along with it,” I teased, wishing I wasn’t. Bella blushed, but laughed at the idea.

“On his deathbed and still thinking kinky thoughts,” Bella groaned. “You’re such a man!” I smiled at her as best as I could, but the fever was taking over, and I slipped into a deep, restless sleep that lasted almost nineteen hours. When I finally woke up, it was dark again, or still, I wasn’t sure. I had vague memories of Bella changing the cold compresses on my head and getting me to sip something, but my memory was fuzzy. I think she may have even carried me into the bathroom a couple of times, but the fever made everything so surreal. I was wearing clean pajamas and underwear I don’t remember changing into, the bed was changed, and I felt like maybe she had washed me up at some point.

She was lying next to me on the bed now, still in the same clothes she was in last night, looking very tired. She didn’t leave my side all day. She felt me stirring and was immediately by my side, changing the compress on my head again.

“Hi, sleepyhead. Feeling any better?” she asked, stifling a yawn herself.

“Bella,” I could barely speak, my throat was so raw from vomiting. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it. I know you would have done the same thing for me.” She smiled, a tear running down the side of her face. I reached up to wipe it away, taking more strength than I thought.

“What’s this for?” I asked as I wiped the tear from her face. “Do I look that bad?”

“No, it’s just that you were so sick, and you were talking. You said…” but she stopped, not finishing her thought. “The fever had you muttering some pretty strange stuff, that’s all.”

“Oh, great. I can only imagine what I must have said,” having no recollection of any of it. “I hope you were at least amused.”

“More than you know,” she whispered.

Chapter: 7

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 7 – Leap of Faith

Bella

Edward was in bed for two more days before he started to look normal again. I cleared it with Rose to take a couple of personal days to stay with him and played nursemaid. When he was finally able to keep something down besides crackers and Gatorade, I made a pot of Grammy’s homemade chicken soup, which she always guaranteed to cure anything that wasn’t terminal.

We both were back to work now, but I missed taking care of him. He was so sick that first day he was totally unable to care for himself. I had never taken care of another adult that way, and it was humbling. He needed help just using the bathroom, and I had to clean him up afterwards. I had never seen someone so sick. During the worst of it, he had an accident I’m sure he didn’t even remember having, and I had to clean him and the bed. He was so helpless in my arms, and in that moment, I knew I would do anything for him. I knew I was beginning to feel more for him than I would even admit to myself, but I couldn’t help it. He called to my heart in ways no one ever had. Especially after his fever induced sleep talking.

After three days alone with Edward, I was sure to face a barrage of questions from Rose and Alice when I got into the office, and I was right.

“Bella!” Alice sang as she rounded the corner of my office door. “I want to hear all about your little vacation.”

“It wasn’t exactly a vacation, Alice. Edward was really sick,” I said, trying to keep the smile off my face, and failing miserably.

“Yeah, right, and I’m the Queen of England,” Alice sneered, looking regally at me down her nose. “Out with it, Swan.”

“Well, your majesty,” I began sarcastically, “He really was sick. The first day of it he was so sick he was delirious with fever and talked in his sleep. He actually said…” I couldn’t go on because of the lump in my throat. Tears started streaming down my face as I remembered the words he said. Alice came to me, putting her arms around me.

“Bella, what? What did he say that has you so upset?” Alice demanded.

“I’m not upset, Alice, I’m… I don’t know what I am,” I said as Alice wiped my face. “His fever was so high, he was delirious, be he spoke to his mom and Gran like they were actually there, about all sorts of stuff, and then he said, ‘This is Bella, my fiancé. She’s the love of my life and a beauty, don’t you think, Gran? Mom, I know you’ll love her as much as I do.’” Alice’s eyes were like saucers as she took in what I told her Edward had said in his delirious state.

“He said it very clearly,” I said, still in shock, almost whispering. “I heard him, like they were standing right there listening, Alice.”

“Oh, Bella!” Alice wrapped me in her arms. “What are you going to do?”

“What is there to do?” I moaned. “He was delirious when he said it. I can’t put any stock in something he said while he was out of his mind!” I started crying harder, wishing I knew for sure if he meant it. I already knew what I was starting to feel towards Edward; I was just too scared and inexperienced to know what to do about it. Besides, we barely knew each other, so it had to be too soon for anything like this.

“Did you tell him?” Alice asked. “Does he even know he said anything like that?”

“NO! And don’t you dare tell anyone else, either, Alice!” I was almost hysterical. “You have to promise me you won’t repeat this to ANYONE!”

“Ok, relax! I promise,” Alice said, trying to calm me down. “But don’t just dismiss this either, Bella. Things said in that state are usually what are truly in a person’s heart. Trust me, I’m the doctor here, remember?”

I tried to put the thoughts of Edwards’s unconscious confession of love for me out of my head and got busy trying to catch up with the paperwork that had piled up in my absence. Alice was true to her word and kept our conversation to herself.

Even though I had taken a three day hiatus, the brutality in our fair city hadn’t, and we had three new young victims in Children’s Hospital to be cared for. Two of the children had only minor cuts and burns, and would be transferred into foster care immediately. The worst of the three was a fifteen year old young man who had fought an abusive stepfather off his mother, allowing her to escape and saving her life, but taking the full brunt of the man’s rage on himself. He had multiple injuries to his face, right arm, and head, and required extensive surgery to repair the damage. He was still in a coma when Alice and I went in to see him.

“Paul?” I picked up the boy’s uninjured hand and started to speak to him, hoping he could still hear me, “Your mom made it out alright. She’s here waiting for you to wake up. You saved her life.”

As many of these cases as I’ve seen, they each still hit me hard. The stepfather must have been a huge brute to do this kind of damage to a boy so large and well built for his age. He obviously tried to fight back from the looks of his defense wounds, but rage won out.

Alice and I found Paul’s mother, Emily, in the waiting area, sobbing and scared. We introduced ourselves as CPS employees, and asked if there was anything she needed. She broke down in my arms.

“I should have stayed and fought Jared harder. Paul shouldn’t have had to defend me. He’s just a boy!” she wailed. “It would have been better if Jared had killed me than to see Paul like this!”

“He did what any young man of worth would have done,” I promised as I tried to console her. “He loves you and did what he had to for you. He’s a special young man, one to be very proud of.” I told her Paul had the best doctors in the area, especially Dr. Masen, and he had the best chances of coming out of this with his care.

She stayed in my arms for quite a while, gently sobbing most of the time. The nurses allowed Emily to come and sit with Paul after a while, so Alice and I left to go check on the other two children being treated. As we were leaving, we met Dr. Cheney and Dr. Black in the corridor.

“Miss Swan,” Dr Cheney crooned, “We haven’t seen you around in a few days. Where have you been hiding?”

“I, uh…” I stammered, trying to think of what to say, but Dr. Cheney interrupted me. “Well, whatever it was, it obviously wasn’t memorable. Now, dinner with me tonight would be something to remember, I promise you,” he said in what I’m sure was supposed to be his ‘smooth’ voice. He just made my skin crawl.

Dr. Black laughed as he stepped forward and shuffled Dr. Cheney aside, “Seriously, Ms. Swan, I’m sure you’d have a much better time with me.” He picked up my hand and started kissing it, but I was most certainly not interested in either of them and was trying to get my hand back when Edward came around the corner. I flashed him a ‘save me’ glance, and he glared furiously at Dr. Black and Dr. Cheney, and then took my hand from Dr. Black and pulled me into an embrace right in front of the two doctors.

“Gentlemen, do you think you could refrain from hitting on my girlfriend, please?” Edward said as his eyes met mine, sparkling and smoldering at the same time. He grinned and kissed me on the cheek, whispering in my ear, “Just play along.”

“Trust me, gentlemen, anything that happens between Miss Swan and myself will be worth remembering for a lifetime,” he said, smiling that smile at me that made me melt before kissing me again, on the lips this time, before releasing me.

“See you at home later?” he winked. I think he was having as much fun as I was watching the Testosterone Twins being shot down, yet again. I nodded and smiled back at him, and then did something I would never have thought I was capable of doing. I took him by the hand, pulling him back to me hard, throwing my arms around his neck and kissing him like I meant business.

“Hurry home,” I moaned sensually and winked back at Edward as I turned and left with Alice, almost causing the other doctors to lose their balance as they turned around to look at me. Edward just stood there staring at me with those smoldering green eyes.

Alice and I started walking back towards the exit, laughing about our exchange and the way Dr. Cheney and Dr. Black almost fainted in the corridor from my performance.

“Bella, I saw the way Edward looked at you. He may have been delirious that night, but he spoke the truth. He’s got it for you bad,” Alice grinned smugly, certain she was right. “And from the looks of that kiss, I’d say it’s mutual.”

“Until I hear it from him while he’s coherent, I’m not betting the future on it,” I said quietly. “Until then, I’m taking it day by day.”

From the corner of my eye, I caught a flashing glimpse of someone I presume to be the orderly who had given me the creeps last week. They disappeared behind the stairwell door so quickly I didn’t have a chance to see them before the door closed. Alice didn’t see anything at all. I had told her about my suspicions, and she suggested I report them, but I had no idea who or what I was dealing with, a name, or even a good description of them. What was there to really report? They were very elusive, and all I had to go on were fleeting glances and the feeling in the pit of my stomach that something wasn’t right.

Rose had made it into the office when we came in from the hospital, looking tired but happy. “Hey, Rose, are you getting enough rest?” I asked, grinning to myself about the conversation I overheard with Emmett. “You look exhausted.” The grin on her face said everything. She was falling for Emmett, and falling hard.

“Who needs sleep when you have Emmett?” she laughed. “He’s got enough drive for the two of us. Honestly, I don’t know what that man eats, but he seems to have a never-ending supply of energy, among other things.” I debated whether to tell Rose about our conversation with Emmett, but thought better of it. Rose wasn’t usually reserved with her sexuality, but with things being so new with Emmett, I figured it best to wait until she offered more details before I did.

Dr. Whitlock walked in then with a serious look on his face, motioning Alice for join him in her office. She flitted off after him, closing the door behind them.

“What do you suppose that was all about?” Rose frowned, pointing over her shoulder at Alice’s door. “He looked like he just lost his puppy.”

“I don’t know. I hope everything’s alright.” Alice and Jasper were so perfect together, like they were made for each other. I hoped nothing was going on to mess things up for them. They emerged half an hour later, both looking a little disheveled and winded. Alice gave him one long last kiss, and then watched him walk out of the office, tears in her eyes. Rose and I were by her side instantly.

“Alice, what happened?” Rose and I asked simultaneously. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, guys, perfect, in fact,” Alice smiled through her tears. “He’s just going away for a week on for a psychiatry conference, and I won’t see him is all.” Jasper had to go to a conference in San Francisco to fulfill his mandated continuing education requirements, and Alice was going through Jasper withdrawals already. “What’s almost as bad,” Alice moaned, “San Francisco has great shopping. I would give anything to be able to go.”

Rose went into her office and checked her calendar, then pulled up something on her computer. She called Alice into her office, and the squealing that ensued told me Alice wouldn’t be in the office for most of next week. She came bouncing out of Rosalie’s office grinning from ear to ear.

“I still have four days of personal time left,” Alice sang. “I’m driving down to surprise him. We’ve never gone away together like this before, so I’m hoping he’s happy to see me. Either way, I know the shopping will be good!” It was awe inspiring to watch Alice on the phone making reservations and planning her surprise visit to Jasper’s hotel. He was not going to know what hit him. Alice came bouncing out of her office, itinerary in hand and a huge grin on her face. “He’s leaving Sunday, and I’ll leave on Tuesday. It’s not exactly a short drive, but in my Porsche, I’ll be there in no time.”

Alice was busy finalizing her plans and I was starving, so I decided to go find lunch on my own. I made my way to a little diner just down the street between the Center and Children’s Hospital. As I walked in towards the counter, someone grabbed my arm, stopping me and pulling me back. I spun around to see a table full of doctors. Drs. Cheney, Black, Yorkie, and Ateara were all sitting around a large table, along with another doctor I didn’t recognize.

“Miss Swan!” Dr. Black had me by the arm, “Please, join us.” I tried to pull away, but before I could protest further, I was seated between Dr. Black and the doctor I didn’t know.

“This is Dr. Jessica Stanley. She’s a new addition to our staff at Children’s, specializing in Pediatric Cardiology.” Dr. Black pointed to the beautiful blond haired doctor, “Dr. Stanley, this is Bella Swan, one of our CPS caseworkers.” I didn’t feel so bad sitting there since there was another woman at the table, but I got the immediate impression she didn’t like me for some reason.

“So, you’re the Bella Swan I’ve been hearing about. Dr. Black and Dr. Cheney tell me you’re a friend of Dr. Masen, is that right?” she asked, smirking at me. She was incredibly beautiful, and obviously intelligent, and I felt somewhat threatened by the way she mentioned Edward.

“Yes, you could say we’re friends,” I offered, wondering why it mattered to her.

“He’s something, isn’t he?” she asked, cutting her eyes at me as she sipped her coffee. “I hear he’s single and quite the catch.” I wasn’t sure what her agenda was, but I was beginning to get irritated. She was obviously fishing for information, and I felt the need to make myself clear.

“He is amazing, actually. We’re dating, which I’m sure Dr. Black and Dr. Cheney probably told you.” I looked her square in the eye, leaving nothing to question.

“Well, there’s dating, and then there’s dating,” she said, looking down at me mockingly as she rose to leave. “It’ll be interesting to see which it is for sure.” She smiled slyly at me, letting me know the game was on. I hated women like her. Somehow, I got the impression there was more to Dr. Stanley’s introduction than I yet knew from the looks on Dr. Black’s and Dr. Cheney’s faces as I left the table. Were they hoping I would back away from Edward, or maybe give them a second look? Not gonna happen. Suddenly I wasn’t hungry anymore.

When I got back to the office, Alice could tell instantly something was bothering me. Perceptive little sprite! “Did you find a worm in your salad?” she asked. “You look like you came across something really foul at lunch by the look on your face.”

“You could definitely say that,” I growled, and then told her about my lunchtime encounter with Children’s Hospital’s newest slithering creature, Dr. Jessica Stanley.

“Bella, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Edward is so into you he can hardly walk straight, much less notice any other women,” Alice said, looking disgusted. “She sounds like one of those women who make a game of seducing men just because she can. Those kinds of women make me embarrassed for our gender and just need to be escorted off the planet, if you ask me.” Alice did make me feel better, but I feared I hadn’t heard the last of Dr. Jessica Stanley.

Edward had arranged for his piano to be delivered late Friday afternoon, so I left work early to be there when it arrived. As I walked in the front door, I heard Sebastian meowing loudly under the closet door. Felicity was lying against the door, trilling back at him and pawing under the door playing with him. I opened the door to let him in, as had become daily habit, leaving the door open for him to come and go as he pleased. He and Felicity settled into a can of cat food together, and I quickly put dinner in the oven and made my way to the parlor to get ready for the piano delivery.

The movers were right on schedule and I was amazed as I watched them remove the padding from the piano as they uncrated it. It was truly a beautiful piece, a work of art. It appeared to be an older model, quite a bit older, in fact. I had never seen a baby grand like it. It was a vintage Ibach, ornately detailed and elegant. As the movers gently uncrated it and set it up, I could see why Edward wanted to be able to get to it so badly. It made the little parlor look like a grand hall as the soft lights played off the rich finish. I was determined to find a master tuner next week and get it tuned and cleaned to sound its best for Edward. The thought brought a smile to my face.

I went to get Grammy’s lemon oil she used to polish the other antiques and set to work cleaning and polishing the beautiful piano’s cabinet. After polishing the cabinet, I set to work on the ivory keys with toothpaste and milk, bringing them to a soft white shine. I had the upper portion absolutely glowing, and was on my hands and knees on the floor polishing the pedals when I heard soft laughter behind me. The sound startled me, causing me to spin around and topple over onto my butt, my legs sprawling out in front of me. Edward stood in the doorway shaking with laughter. I threw the cleaning cloth at him, barely missing his head.

“Sneaking up on your neighbor isn’t nice, you know,” I growled at him. He came over and offered his hand, helping me to my feet. “Is it ok to sneak up on my girlfriend?” he asked softly, smiling down at me. I was sure my heart just stopped. Surely he was just saying that for the other doctor’s benefit this morning!

“Is that what I am?” I asked, looking up at him from under my lashes.

“That depends,” he said as he pulled me into his arms, “Do you want to be?”

I wasn’t sure what to say. Of course I wanted to be Edward’s girlfriend. I wanted to be more than just a girlfriend, but how could I do that when we really only barely knew each other? The past few weeks had been wonderful, but we were still so new at this, I was afraid of going too fast and ending up screwing everything up. Just shut up and kiss him, Bella!

“What do you think?” was all I said as I jumped up in his arms and wrapped my legs around his waist, kissing him like I never had before.

He moved towards the piano, sitting me on the top, his hands sliding under my shirt, caressing the skin of my back and sides. We finally broke for a breath, our foreheads together as both of us started giggling.

“Could you be a little clearer? I don’t think I understood what you were saying,” Edward teased as he slid his hands up and down my thighs, his thumbs caressing the inner sides, sending white hot sparks up my spine.

“If you’re asking me, then yes, I’ll be your girlfriend,” I uttered breathlessly into his ear, but became shy when I spoke again. “But there’s something I need to tell you before you decide for sure you want me.”

“What is it?” he asked as he raised his head to look at me, curiosity burning in his sparkling eyes.

“Ever since I was a little girl, both my Grammy and my mom taught me that a lady waited for the first man she gave herself to intimately to be her husband. I know that’s kind of old fashioned these days, but I’m still waiting, Edward. I’m kind of awkward for a reason,” I said shyly, my eyes on my hands in my lap. Edward wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in my neck. He just stood there holding me, gently rubbing his hands up and down my back.

“Bella, you truly are my treasure,” he whispered against my cheek. “I’m a lucky man to have found you. I’ll see that their wise counsel is followed. You’re worth the wait.”

“You still want me then?” I asked as tears played at the corners of my eyes.

Edward whispered as he gently kissed my cheek, “More than ever.”

Edward

The only thing that made having the flu bearable was having Bella taking care of me. If she hadn’t been there for me, I don’t know what I would have done. I knew she had to be a compassionate person to do the job she did, but the way she took care of me while I was sick spoke to me of the kind of woman she truly was. She rarely left my side, cooking for me and waiting on me hand and foot until I was able to stand on my own. I’m fairly certain she even cleaned me up, which was very kind of her. I don’t remember the full extent of what she had to do for me, but the fact that she took care of me at all was going above and beyond the call. She was going to make a great mother some day. I was humbled that she even sacrificed her personal days at work for me.

I don’t remember much of my first twenty four hours of being sick, but occasional fleeting memories of dreams would pop up, some of them quite bizarre, and others almost real. The most realistic of them was a dream of my parents and grandparents coming to visit Bella and I right after we announced our engagement. Mom and Gran looked extremely happy, and they all gave us their blessings. Even though I had never met Bella’s grandparents, they were there, too, and Bella’s grandmother told me to remind Bella of her wedding gown in the sealed trunk in the attic. Looking back on this dream, I was not so sure now that’s what it was.

Going back to work after spending three full days with Bella was tough. There were several new cases that had come in during my absence, the worst of which was a young man whose stepfather had nearly beaten him to death.

On one of my rounds to check on him, I had a chance to talk to his mother. I asked her if there was anything she needed, and she told me the social workers were just by to check on her and Paul, and Bella had been particularly warm and caring towards her. She told me I had just missed them, and that Bella had spoken favorably of me, assuring her Paul was in the best hands.

“Miss Swan is a wonderful person. If you need anything, she certainly will be there for you,” I spoke out of experience. “She’s definitely a rare find.”

“She’s special to you, isn’t she?” Emily asked, smiling. “I can tell by the look in your eyes. I saw it in hers, too, when she spoke of you earlier.”

“Yes, she is, more than I ever realized,” I half said to myself. “She’s one of a kind.”

I finished checking Paul, and quickly hurried through the corridors, hoping to catch up to Bella before she left the hospital. As I approached the corner of the corridor, I could hear Dr. Cheney using his slimy pick up voice on yet another conquest, promising a memorable evening. Yeah, the only thing she’ll remember is the cloud of dust he’ll leave her in on the way to his next conquest. Pig. Dr. Black piped up with his offer and I about lost it. I turned the corner to see Black slobbering on Bella’s hand in a phony attempt to be a gentleman, which made my blood boil. She looked relieved and genuinely happy to see me, and I knew right then she belonged in my arms, not Cheney’s or Black’s. MINE. I still had to work with these clowns, however, so I put on my best diplomatic face and sucked in my urge to leave him and Cheney both bleeding on the hospital floor for even thinking about touching her.

“Gentlemen, do you think you could refrain from hitting on my girlfriend, please?” Bella seemed truly grateful for the rescue, but surprised and a little shocked, although she hid it well from them, melting into my arms. I whispered for her to just play along so as not to scare her away. I still wasn’t sure where we stood and wanted a chance to make my intentions clear before losing her to one of these two lechers.

“Trust me, gentlemen, anything that happens between Miss Swan and myself will be worth remembering for a lifetime,” I said, for their benefit and for Bella’s. I had every intention of making lots of memories with this wonderful, beautiful woman. The look on her face left me wanting her more than ever, and I pulled her into a kiss, not caring who was standing there.

The look on Cheney’s and Black’s face was priceless as I asked Bella if I would see her back at home later. She nodded yes, but then pulled me back to her so hard I almost lost my balance, wrapping me in her arms and kissing me like she wasn’t just playing for the crowd, then told me to hurry home in a voice that stopped me in my tracks, almost melting my zipper. I wasn’t the only one who almost lost it from the looks on my colleague’s faces.

I wanted to invite Bella to lunch, but didn’t get a chance to go myself due to an emergency case that came in shortly after our exchange in the hall. I finally made it back to my office to find a message from Alice Brandon asking me to call her back. She sounded like something was wrong, so I dialed her immediately.

Alice answered, and began telling me of her concerns about an elusive person Bella had mentioned watching her in the corridors of the hospital on a number of occasions. “Edward, I know she’s totally freaked, but tries to put on a brave face. What should we do? Do you think we should mention it to the police?”

“Unless we have something more to give, them, Alice, I don’t know if there’s anything they can do. I’ll talk to Emmett, though, and have him do some checking. In the meantime, would you do me a favor?” I asked, trying to keep the concern out of my voice.

“Sure, Edward. You know I’ll do anything for Bella. She’s my best friend,” Alice agreed.

“Thanks, Alice. I’m so glad she has you. Would you let me know if she’s going to be at the hospital alone? I would feel better knowing when she’s here if there’s someone we need to worry about hanging around.” The thought of someone harming her had me determined to do everything in my power to protect her.

Alice also mentioned Bella’s lunchtime encounter with Dr. Stanley, which actually didn’t surprise me. I’d had my share of less than pleasant encounters with my colleague as well. Ever since Dr. Stanley arrived at Children’s a few weeks ago, she had made it obvious she was interested in me. I found her shallow and unappealing, even though everyone else seemed to think her such a beauty. I just didn’t see it. The good news was, she was a good cardiologist. As far as I knew, that was her only redeeming quality.

I arrived home to find the door of the closet slightly ajar, and Sebastian nowhere to be seen in the apartment. He had obviously been invited to go visit Felicity again. I slipped into the kitchen to find him and Felicity lying contentedly together, cleaning each other and looking well fed.

I could hear Bella singing softly to herself from the parlor and quietly made my way to the doorway, where I stood watching her as she worked fervently polishing my piano. From the look of the deep, rich glowing shine on the antique wood and the luminous shine of the keys, it was obvious she had put a lot of hard work into cleaning and buffing it to make it look so beautiful. I was touched that she would take such great care with something that meant so much to me.

I couldn’t stifle my laughter at the sight of her down on her hands and knees polishing the pedals of the piano. She looked like she was having such a good time I wanted to join her down there. Unfortunately, my laughter startled her and sent her flailing onto her backside, which was even more hysterical. She threw her cleaning cloth at me, pouting those beautiful lips that immediately made me want to kiss them.

“Sneaking up on your neighbor isn’t nice, you know,” she snapped at me, but the look on her face let me know she wasn’t really angry at me.

“Is it ok to sneak up on my girlfriend?” I asked her as I helped her up. I had called her my girlfriend this morning in front of my colleagues, but we had never actually made anything official between ourselves. I waited, holding my breath for her reply.

“Is that what I am?” she asked. In my heart, she was already way more than that, but I needed to hear it from her, so I asked her if she wanted to be. I didn’t want to rush her or scare her away, I wanted it to be her choice, but I was quite certain I couldn’t take it if she turned me down.

She looked at me for a few seconds, seeming to fight with some emotion within herself before getting a determined look on her face, her eyes locking on mine as she body tackled me, wrapping herself around me and kissing me in a way that told me all I needed to know. She wanted me as much as I want her to be mine. YES!

I wanted her, and I couldn’t keep my hands off her. When we finally came up for air, she was breathless, but started blushing and became very shy and self conscious. When she said she had something to tell me before I decided for sure if I wanted her, she scared me a little, but I was more intrigued. The next words out of her beautiful mouth left me in awe of the angel before me.

She was a virgin.

That stopped me in my tracks, and all the lusty thoughts and desires to take her right there on the piano melted into respect and protectiveness as I vowed to honor her wishes to wait to give herself to the man who would promise her forever. The details of the dream I had while I was sick became clear, and I knew I would be that man. She was the one Gran said would come.

She seemed concerned by my silence, no doubt believing that I didn’t want her after all, but that was the furthest thing from the truth. I knew we needed some time to give us both a chance to grow together, but I wanted her now more than ever. She was worth the wait.

Most of all, I wanted her forever.

Chapter: 8

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 8 – Holidays

Bella

Edward and I were officially dating. You would have thought that would deter the ‘try to date Bella’ enthusiasts around the hospital, but it just fueled the fervor. Dr. Cheney seemed to take it as a personal challenge to try to divert my affections away from Edward. I so wanted to tell him to go stock up on KY and get a Playboy, but knowing I would have to interact with him on a daily basis kept my tactful side at the forefront. He kept it to himself when Edward was around, only approaching me when Edward wasn’t looking. Worm!

Dr. Black was slightly better, but he, too, made it a point to find me in the corridors of the hospital when Edward wasn’t with me, trying to make suggestive small talk. I felt like he was trying to feel me out, seeing if I would be interested, but the only feelings I could muster for him were indifference and irritation, with an occasional spurt pure exasperation thrown in for good measure when he started with his lines. If he could only interact with me normally like a friend, without verging on sexual harassment, I could easily see being friends with him. He was really warm, funny, and outgoing, but he just couldn’t seem to drop it with the unwanted advances. I probably should have told Edward what was going on, but I didn’t want him feeling like he had to follow me around the hospital to protect me. He had enough to do to take care of his patients without their idiocy proving a distraction. Besides, I was a big girl and could take care of myself.

The weather was crisp and cold of late, and it seemed like, even though the sun was shining less hours and at greater intervals, when it did, it was brighter, and the sky bluer than I could ever remember. Even the overcast and rainy days seemed better. Maybe it just had something to do with my view of the world lately.

My favorite time of year was upon us – the Holidays. For me, the season started with Halloween and ended with New Years day. It had been a tradition of my grandparents to have a ‘Welcome Fall’ decorating weekend in October, complete with friends, hot apple cider, spice cake, and enough tasteful fall decorations to be festive without being tacky. These decorations usually stayed up through dinner on Thanksgiving, followed by a sprint of Christmas decorating, complete with ample mistletoe for Poppa to trap Grammy under as often as he could catch her. I made a mental note to remember to get a few sprigs. This was one tradition I was truly looking forward to observing this year.

Rose and Alice came to help, of course, along with Jasper and Emmett. Carlisle and Esme also came out and brought all the girls. Stephenie was healing nicely from her last surgery, and Edward was pleased to see that she would look very near normal except for a thin white line through her eyebrow. Nothing a little brow pencil couldn’t cover. She and the other girls ran happily through the yard spreading spider webbing and taking turns moving the pumpkins around into groupings they found most aesthetically pleasing. It was hysterical to watch the four oldest trying to out-decorate each other. Dorianne spent most of her time perched on Carlisle’s shoulders, jabbering at everything going on. She had clearly stolen his heart.

Edward helped me stuff old thrift store overalls, gloves, and flannel shirts with leaves to make a cute ‘scarecrow’ couple to sit on the bench on the front porch, complete with burlap heads, and a straw hat for his and a bonnet for mine. Rose swatted Emmett later when she caught him stuffing extra leaves into the chest of my scarecrow after having crammed the ‘hand’ of Edwards’s scarecrow inside the front of my scarecrow’s overalls. I wouldn’t have expected anything less from Emmett.

Halloween was tonight, and the Cullen’s stayed to take the girls trick-or-treating in our neighborhood since they lived so far from anyone else. In the spirit of the holiday, not only did the children have costumes, but all the adults did as well. Esme and Carlisle dressed as a doctor and a nurse, Alice and Jasper were Peter Pan and Captain Hook, and Rosalie was a cheerleader and Emmett a football player. Edward surprised me when he came through the closet door dressed as Batman, which was hysterical since I had chosen Cat Woman, and we hadn’t even told each other anything about our costume choices.

We spent the evening handing out candy, when we weren’t guarding it from Emmett. He was worse than a five year old when it came to chocolate bars. The kids came by in droves, and we handed out candy until after eight o’clock. The girls were starting to get tired, so we decided to call it a night. I went back outside to blow out the candles in all the pumpkins and then turned to go in the house when I caught movement in the shadows out of the corner of my eye. I turned quickly, but only saw a fleeing shadow in the light of the street lamp. I got the same chills up my spine as I did in the hospital corridors the last time I thought I saw someone watching me. This was getting creepy.

“Bella, what’s the matter? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost,” Esme commented, somewhat concerned by the disconcerted look on my face as I came into the family room.

“I’ve actually seen lots of ghosts tonight,” I laughed nervously. “But I got the feeling just now someone was watching me outside. I saw something out of the corner of my eye, and saw a shadow moving, but I’m not sure. It just gave me the creeps. I guess that kind of goes with the holiday, though,” I laughed nervously. Alice looked at me, her brows together, and knew exactly what I was thinking. Edward noticed the unspoken communication between the two of us, but didn’t say anything at the time.

We all helped Carlisle and Esme get the youngest three girls into their new van, bidding them goodnight. Walking back towards the house, we noticed Alice and Jasper had moved onto the side porch and were locked in a deep, passionate kiss. Emmett, being the sensitive soul he was, yelled, “I always new Hook had perverted intention towards that little boy!” Jasper just grinned, and Alice stuck her tongue out at Emmett.

“I’ll bet you have plans to have Rose wear that cheerleader costume again before the weekend’s out, too!” Edward teased Emmett. Rose blushed crimson, but the look on her face told us Edward was probably right.

“I don’t know, Edward, our fantasies seem pretty tame compared to the fun you two could have in those get-ups!” Emmett countered, pointing at my form fitting body stocking, stiletto heels, and cat ears, mask, and tail set. “You can’t tell me there won’t be any kind of interspecies love going on there, my friend!”

Edward came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, “Actually, no, there won’t,” Edward said, kissing my neck. Emmett looked back and forth between us, stunned. The very idea of a man and a woman practically living together, dating, and being as close as we were without a sexual relationship was more than Emmett’s brain seemed able to process. He stood there a minute pondering the apparent anomaly that was our relationship.

“How does that work, exactly?” Emmett asked, confusion still evident on his face. “I mean, how can you NOT…?”

“Emmett,” I tried to explain, “I know this may sound kind of corny and old fashioned to you, but I want a photo album kind of relationship, something worth capturing that I’d be proud to show as an example to my kids some day. I want the kind of love you don’t get unless you take the time to give it meaning and let it grow, building it on a strong foundation. Without that, it’s like building a house on bare ground instead of concrete; it’s subject to rapid decay and destruction from storms, since it isn’t anchored to anything solid.” I held my head up and took a deep breath, deciding to share the secret I had so apprehensively guarded from everyone but Alice and Edward.

“I’m still a virgin. I’ve never done anything with anyone, and I’m waiting until I’m sure I have what’s important to me before I do. After you’ve danced with me at my wedding, then you can congratulate the lucky guy whose night is going to be one to remember.”

“You’re a…?” Rose gasped. “But…how?” She was as confused as Emmett. Rose had lost her virginity in middle school and had no problems with being sexually active and forward. The concept of someone my age not having had sex yet was inconceivable, but what I was saying was somehow hitting a note with her. Emmett had come up behind her and started rubbing his hands up and down her exposed sides. She elbowed him in the gut, making him drop his hands from her waist, and was listening to me intently. Alice had moved away from Jasper and was listening to me as well, grinning from ear to ear.

“Well, Rose, it hasn’t really been all that difficult, until now,” I turned around in Edward’s arms, looking him in the eyes while I spoke. “But even though I have the biggest reason of all now not to wait any longer, I have an even bigger reason TO wait.”

I told them about the counsel from my mom and Grammy, and told them what Poppa used to tell me about love. He believed the difference between love and lust was that lust was like running a rough, choppy mad dash to the finish line: you’re finished quickly and on to the next race, and if you trip, you lose. But true love was like having a ticket that never expired for a sure, steady ride on a beautiful Carousel you never wanted to end in order to enjoy the good parts over and over again together. And with that ticket, even though you may get bucked off the bounding horses sometimes, you never fell off the Carousel because you had a rail of love to hold you in place.

“I want that ticket to the Carousel, Rose,” I whispered. Edward leaned in and kissed my forehead softly, smiling down at me.

I guess I gave everyone something to think about. Alice and Rose ran to me, pulling the three of us into a girly, giggling embrace. Edward was laughing now, but Jasper and Emmett stood there staring at us, probably knowing that Peter was safe from pedophilia for now, and there would be no cheering in the end zone, either, at least for tonight.

Edward and I continued to share our early mornings, evenings, and weekends whenever he was home together, but at night we parted ways. It was getting harder and harder to watch him cross back through the closet into his apartment every night, but he was determined to be respectful. I had given him full access to the house so he could use the laundry room and play his piano whenever he liked, which he regularly did for me as I fell asleep. He surprised me one Saturday afternoon with the delivery of a large beautiful antique wardrobe, which he placed in the apartment and moved all his clothes from the closet into it. He then took down the shelf and hanging bar in the closet so he wouldn’t have to duck and squeeze past his clothes to pass through, essentially making the closet a short hallway.

Sebastian became a regular fixture in the house, and he and Felicity spent most of their time upstairs curled up together in my bed, when they weren’t camped out in front of the food bowl. They had become inseparable, and wailed and pawed pitifully under the door at each other until someone opened the door to reunite them. Thus, the door into the kitchen remained pushed open these days, flat against the wall, the door on Edward’s side only closing when he was dressing, otherwise it was always open as well.

Even though this was my favorite time of year, and the Holidays were a source of great joy for me, the stress of the holidays for some was too much, and sometimes with that stress came the casualties we dreaded. We had many more new cases than I would have hoped for to manage, and several of those involved children being hospitalized and under Edward’s care. Still, he managed to get home most nights before seven thirty, and I had dinner waiting. We both did the cleaning and laundry, and we shopped together, he insisting on paying for the groceries since I did all the cooking. In almost every way, we functioned as a married couple, all but one. I dreamed of Edward regularly, and some mornings it was hard to look him in the eyes after what I had done with him in my dreams for fear of tackling him on the kitchen table to make my dreams a reality. Based on the intensity of the kisses he gave me on some mornings, I often suspected it was the same for him.

I was up and in the kitchen early this morning. The day before Thanksgiving was always a busy one in this kitchen ever since I could remember, and this year would be no different. All our friends and family were invited to join us for dinner tomorrow, and there was much to be done. Since the weather was bad in the northeast, Alice and Rose would be spending Thanksgiving here in Seattle, not that they minded much given whom they would be spending it with. Emmett and Jasper offered to go turkey hunting for a bird, but I assured them I would much rather shop and defrost than pluck and gut any day.

The house was soon filled with the smells of cinnamon, cranberries, and oranges as I baked pies, breads, and cakes. The sun had not even come up yet, and I already had two huge cranberry breads made, yeast rolls baking, and was cooling two pies and an orange cake when Edward stumbled into the kitchen in his cotton pajama pants, and no shirt. Even though he did this almost daily, he still managed to take my breath away every time.

“You’re up early,” Edward mumbled as he poured himself a cup of coffee. “Did you ever go to bed last night?”

I quickly snapped myself out of my stupor from ogling his perfect chest. “I did, for a couple of hours, anyway,” I yawned.

I took out the rolls and turned off the oven, and had moved back to my mixing bowl and begun making frosting for the cake when I felt a pair of firm arms slip around my waist and warm breath on the side of my neck. The kitchen was warm and I had taken my robe off, leaving me in just my thin cotton nightshirt and thong under my apron. Edward’s touch raised goose bumps all over me as usual, and as he turned me around for a kiss, the effect of his touch was obvious. He looked down appreciatively, and then pulled me to him, snickering. As our bodies pressed together, I could tell he was enjoying having my breasts pressed against him, and I was having the same effect on him as he did on me.

“Do you think we have some sort of baking fetish?” I asked Edward, giggling against his chest.

“I don’t know. This always seems to happen when I’m around you in the kitchen, doesn’t it?” he chuckled. “Maybe it has something to do with the way you look in that apron.”

“So, you’re telling me you only love me for my cooking, is that it?” I teased, shoving him away playfully and turning back to my mixing bowl. Suddenly, my feet left the floor and I found myself sitting on the countertop, Edward pressing in between my knees. He took my face into one hand gently while pulling me into him with the other.

“The key word in that sentence, my dearest one, is ‘love’. Not only do I love you for your cooking, but I love you for your warmth, your friendship, your loyalty, your purity, and your beauty, inside and out. But mostly, I just love you. Bella, I’m so in love with you.”

He finally said the words I had longed to tell him myself.

“I love you, too, Edward, so much…” was all I said before our lips crashed together.

He moved away from the counter and carried me through the closet into his bedroom, laying down with me and covering us up. It was only a few minutes until six, and I was suddenly very sleepy. Edward held me close to him, wrapping his arms snugly around me, where we both drifted off to sleep.

Four hours later, I awoke to the tantalizing smell of onions, celery, and sage. Edward had left me to sleep and I could hear him in the kitchen humming to himself over the sound of sizzling. I wandered into the kitchen to find Edward, showered and dressed, working over the stove sautéing a skillet of chopped vegetables.

“That smells incredible. What are you making?” I asked as I watched him cook. He already had a huge bowl of crumbled bread on the table, along with several other ingredients.

“I’m making my mom’s stuffing. I used to help her make it every year. I’ve been making it by myself for the past few years since she died, and eating it alone on Thanksgiving. I’m so glad I have you and all our friends to share it with this year.”

“Me, too,” I said as I wrapped my arms around his waist in a tight hug. “I’m going to take a shower and get dressed, and then I’ll be back to help.”

With a quick kiss, I was up the stairs and into the bathroom. While I showered, the thought of Edward alone during the holidays made me sad and broke my heart. He deserved so much better than that. He would never spend another holiday alone if I had anything to say about it.

I finished showering and dried off, but was still drying my hair when I heard the doorbell. I heard Edward call up the stairs that he would get it.

“Happy Thanksgiving!” I heard my mother’s voice clearly over the hair dryer. “You must be Edward!”

I had endured many telephone inquisitions about Edward from my mom since we first met, and I was certain she practically had her foot over Charlie’s on the gas pedal the whole way from Forks trying to get him to drive faster so she could get here and assess the situation for herself. I could hear in her voice the skepticism over our living arrangements, and I had assured her he was living in the apartment, but gave her few details about how intertwined our lives had become. Some things my mom just didn’t need to know, for my sanity sake. The next four days would prove interesting, at best.

As I walked into the kitchen I saw Renee standing there, staring at the open doors between the kitchen and Edward’s bedroom. I just smiled and gave her a big hug.

“Bella, my baby, it’s so good to see you, and you look so different!” Renee looked me up and down, taking in my new style of dress, “This looks wonderful on you!” I had grabbed a pair of perfect fitting jeans, a fitted scoop neck burnt orange cashmere sweater, and a pair of brown suede pant boots.

“And you didn’t tell me he was this handsome,” Renee gushed as she patted Edward’s arm. “He reminds me of your father when he was younger.”

“Are you saying I’m not still handsome now, Renee?” Charlie teased, grabbing me up in a bear hug.

“You’ll always be my handsome prince, dear,” Renee grinned. “Now, what do we still need to make?” she asked, looking for an apron. Edward was finishing the stuffing, so Renee joined him at the table to supervise seasonings. Edward grinned at me and winked, letting me know he had the situation under control, so I went to help Charlie unload the car.

“I’m so glad you guys made it,” I said as I helped Charlie take their bags upstairs to the guest room, unpacking their things into the dresser and closet. “So tell me, has mom said much about things around here?” I asked tentatively, wondering what all Renee had told him about Edward and me.

“Pretty much just the basics, you know, what he does, that he lives in the apartment, that kind of stuff. But she didn’t tell me you two were in love,” he said with a big grin.

I think my heart stopped at that moment. Was it that obvious? “H-how did you know?” I asked, dumbfounded.

“Bella, I’ve looked into the face of love for almost thirty years. I know what it looks like. The way he looked at you when you came into the room down there, his face said it all.”

“He told me he loved me this morning,” I almost whispered, “And I do love him, too, daddy, so much.”

“He seems like a good man, Bella, I’m happy for you both. Now, I suppose we should have that little talk about responsibility…” Charlie started the talk I knew he felt I needed, but I cut him short, mostly out of embarrassment.

“Dad, I’m waiting. Still. And I’ll be waiting until I’m married. That’s the most responsible I can get, so we don’t need to have this talk, please,” I moaned, blushing as red as he was. He agreed to drop it, and I could tell he was relieved as well.

We came back downstairs to find Edward and Renee discussing the merits of fresh versus dried rubbed sage, both adding and tasting various herbs and seasonings into the stuffing. Edward smiled when I came in, pulling me into his arms and kissing my cheek. Renee cocked an eyebrow at me and smiled slyly, letting me know there would be a discussion about this later.

We spent the rest of the day cooking and getting the turkey ready for the oven in the morning. Renee insisted on giving the turkey her annual ‘beauty treatment’ as she called it, thoroughly scouring the skin for missed pin feathers and other undesirable debris, which she meticulously removed. By the time the turkey was seasoned and put in to hold until morning, it was immaculately beautiful.

Charlie and I began setting the table for dinner tomorrow, laying out Grammy’s beloved Blue Willow china. I watched as Charlie carefully handled the pieces, and I caught a bit of moisture around his eyes. Edward and Renee had moved into the parlor to look at his piano, and when I heard the most beautiful rendition of Moonlight Serenade coming from in there I could imagine, I looked over to see full blown tears streaming down Charlie’s cheeks, just like me. I put my arms around his middle and he hugged me close, kissing my forehead as we stood like that for a moment, missing them so much together.

We wiped each other’s faces and went into the parlor, where he took Renee in his arms and swayed around the room with her while I stood behind Edward, my hands on his shoulders. Charlie winked and nodded at me across the room, letting me know he approved. It was getting late, so we all decided to head to bed and get an early start tomorrow.

Charlie and Renee had gone upstairs, leaving Edward and I at the bottom of the stairs to say goodnight. “Thank you for today,” I told him. “You and my mom seemed to hit it off beautifully.”

“How could I not love her and your dad when they gave me the most beautiful thing in my life?” he grinned, pulling me close to his chest. “I only wish you were coming with me instead of going up there alone.”

“Or you coming up there with me,” I purred, nibbling his ear, “Instead of going in there alone. God, I would never hear the end of it,” I giggled as I kissed him goodnight and we went to our separate rooms.

I had barely gotten in bed good when I heard a light tap on my door. “Bella, are you still awake?” Renee whispered around the door. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah, mom, what’s up?” I asked, but I figured I already knew. She came in and sat down on the bed, smiling her all-knowing smile at me.

“Your father told me you and Edward are in love, but he didn’t have to tell me that, I could see it in his eyes the minute he opened the door,” she laughed. “No man displays that strong of an aura of belonging in a home unless he does, and he does, doesn’t he?”

“The only thing we don’t do is have sex, mom. Other than that, you’d think we were married. It’s getting so hard to leave his side at night now. I just want to wake up next to him, in his arms.”

“In due time, dear. He feels the same way, I can tell. I expect to be getting a call from you any time telling me he’s proposed,” she grinned, patting my knee.

“Mom! Don’t you dare say anything to him! Please...!” I began to protest, panicked that she would say or do something to freak Edward out.

“Don’t worry, Bella, I won’t have to.” And with that, she kissed my cheek and said goodnight, closing the door behind her.

The wind had picked up and a pacific northern blowing in off the ocean was brewing as predicted, promising a stormy, possibly restless night. Charlie and Renee both slept with earplugs that would block an atomic blast because each snored as loud as the other, so the storm wouldn’t bother them, at least.

Exhausted from all the cooking and baking, I quickly fell into a restless, dream filled sleep. I found myself wandering in a darkened building, ducking through deserted corridors, terrified by an unknown man following me. I couldn’t see his face, but I could feel his presence, and I knew his intentions were malicious. Occasional flashes of light were coming from empty rooms as I ran past, searching for someone to help me, knowing the man was closing in on me fast. His voice was loud as he caught up to me in a darkened stairwell, and he grabbed me from behind, throwing me to the floor and pouncing on top of me heavily, growling and tearing at my clothes and trying to…

I sat bolt upright in bed, trembling violently with bloodcurdling screams, scattering Sebastian and Felicity off me with the noise and commotion. Edward was in my room in a matter of seconds, holding and comforting me, looking me over trying to find anything wrong with me. The storm outside raged fiercely as thunder boomed and lightning cracked outside my windows, flashing bright as day. I clung to Edward, sobbing like a frightened child, having always been terrified of intense storms, and the nightmare that accompanied it didn’t help. It was barely two o’clock in the morning, but I begged Edward not to leave me, telling him about my horrible nightmare and that I didn’t want to be alone.

“Please, stay with me and hold me, at least until this passes,” I whimpered. I could feel Edward laughing softly as he climbed into bed with me and gathered me into his arms.

“Of course, my love. I’m not going anywhere. You’re safe now. Go back to sleep.” We fell back to sleep wrapped in each other’s arms. However, we were woken up at eight o’clock by Charlie, who walked in and did a double take when he saw Edward and I cuddled up together, asleep in each other’s arms.

“AHEM!” Charlie barked. “GOOD MORNING!” Renee was coming out of the bathroom and stood beside Charlie, staring, her mouth open and eyes wide.

Edward and I woke with a start, sure that the house was being blown down around our heads. He had run upstairs to check on me without a shirt, and I was sleeping in a little tube top style baby doll and thong set, so when we looked up, both of us with bare shoulders, it appeared pretty suspicious.

“Mom, dad, I…” I stammered, half asleep, trying to do damage control. Edward looked at me, my hair going in every direction and my top barely up high enough, and started laughing. If I wasn’t so mortified by my parents standing there staring at us like we had just been caught in the backseat making out, I would have laughed, too. I looked at Edward and his hair was also a mess, and his green eyes sparkled as he looked back at me, making me smile.

“I love you, Bella,” Edward whispered to me, pulling me into his arms, my parents still watching.

Renee turned around to head back to the guest room, pushing Charlie in front of her as she pulled my door shut. “I’m going down to put the turkey in the oven, Bella. Come down as soon as you can,” I heard her yell through the door, laughing all the way down the hall. Charlie was muttering something and I heard Renee whisper loudly, “SSHHHH!”

I couldn’t contain it, and neither could Edward. We both started giggling hysterically. He was so funny when he laughed like this, I couldn’t help but want to tickle him to make him laugh harder. I discovered he was excruciatingly ticklish on his chest, so I hopped on him to pin him down and started attacking his chest with my fingers, him squirming madly under me and laughing, trying to defend himself. I was stronger than he anticipated with my knees locked on either side of his hips. He kept trying to grab my hip bones, but had to stop to defend his chest. I finally stopped tickling him to let him catch his breath, amazed at the beautiful man beneath me. I could definitely get used to the feeling of having him there.

It was not until then that I realized where I was sitting and the effect it was having on him. Feeling mischievous, I grinned wickedly and bounced up and down a few times, Edward shooting me a warning look and a low growl, but obviously enjoying what I was doing. He reached up and pulled me down to him, kissing me such that I melted in his arms.

“This is getting to be a habit I could get used to,” Edward said between breaths. “Definitely the preferable way to wake up in the morning.”

“BELLA, ARE YOU COMING!?” I heard Renee yell up the stairs, looking for help getting dinner started. Edward and I looked at each other, bursting into another round of giggles.

Before I had a chance to yell down that I would be there shortly, Edward whispered in my ear in a breathless snicker, “Already almost did, mom!”

Edward

Since Bella and I had become a couple, it seemed like there was a private joke I was missing at work. On more than one occasion, I walked up on Dr. Cheney and Dr. Black chuckling amongst themselves, only to have them drop whatever they were talking about when I approached. Very strange indeed.

Dr. Stanley was becoming a persistent problem, constantly trying to find me in secluded places, making suggestive comments and offers I definitely could refuse. The more time I spent with Bella, the more repugnant this woman was to me. She couldn’t hold a light to Bella’s warmth, beauty, and grace. If filing sexual harassment charges became necessary to back her off, I would do it.

I was so excited to have my piano in the house, and Bella was eager for me to play for her, which I did almost nightly. She cooked for the both of us now, which was great for me because I probably wouldn’t eat nearly as well if she didn’t. I loved helping her around the house because it meant I got to spend time with her, and the cleaning got done, with the occasional water spray fights when we cleaned the bathrooms. Ever the gentleman, I always aimed at the front of her shirt. Hey, I may be a gentleman, but I was still a guy…

Decorating for the fall was fun, and reminded me of the times I spent with my dad getting ready for Halloween. He was a real character when it came to this particular holiday, loving to scare the pants off the little kids. I thought of him especially when we had to constantly run Emmett out of the candy bowl. Dad was the same way, and more than once, mom had to make another run to the store for more candy because of dad’s trick-or-treating from our own bowl. The man definitely had a sweet tooth, and he would have so loved Bella’s baking.

We were busy digging out the Halloween decorations when Emmett came up and slapped me on the back. “Edward, brother, please tell me you’re hitting that nightly!” he growled as he watched Bella running around the yard in her costume. I had to admit, it was all I could do to keep my thoughts in check every time I looked at her, but his comment took me aback.

“No, Emmett, I’m not. And I’ll thank you to keep your eyes on your own cheerleader.” I grinned at him to let him know I wasn’t mad, but I meant what I was saying.

“Hey, not to worry, bro. Rose’s all I can handle. But, dang, man. She’s a serious hottie! Why aren’t you enjoying the benefits of almost co-habitation, dude?”

“Because, she’s…” I was cut off by Rosalie yelling at Emmett’s latest stunt with the scarecrows, and he took off as she came after him. Jasper and Alice were laughing hysterically at the two of them, as were Carlisle and Esme. Bella was laughing so hard she was doubling over, and I smirked as Jasper and Carlisle tried very hard to be gentlemen and not stare at her again. Her Cat Woman costume was amazing. It fit every curve and rise of her gorgeous body, the stilettos accentuating her incredible legs. Whenever she moved, I was mesmerized. All the guys were as taken off guard by her as I was more than once during the evening. Who could blame them? Fortunately, none of the girls noticed. Even Rosalie paled in comparison to her, and Rose was the kind of woman most men dreamed of, but not me. Bella was my addiction of choice.

We had all come inside after wrapping up the night, and while Bella went back out to deal with the candles in the pumpkins, I just had to pull Carlisle aside. “So, how insane is it to get this many little girls ready to go trick-or-treating?” I asked him with a grin.

“Joyful chaos, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything,” he laughed. “I’ve never seen Esme so in her element, and so happy. Thank you, Edward, for all you’ve done for us. And thank you in advance for bringing Bella into our little unconventional family.”

I nodded and grinned, but as I noticed Bella come back in, she was pale and looked terrified. She blew it off as being spooked because it was Halloween, but the look that passed between her and Alice told me there was a lot more to it.

I called Alice the next day to find out what was going on. “Hey, Alice, I need to ask you something. Last night when Bella came back inside, what happened? I saw the look you two shared. Does she still believe someone is watching her?”

Alice took a deep breath, “Edward, I’m glad you called. I’m not sure what’s going on.” Against Bella’s wishes, she confirmed that Bella felt like someone had indeed been watching her again around the hospital, but didn’t want to worry me.

“What should we do, Edward? I don’t want to upset her, but I certainly don’t want to lose her, either. This is just getting too creepy.” Alice was near tears. I promised her I would speak with Emmett again and see if there was anything else we could do. Years of dealing with the aftermath of society’s monsters made me keenly aware of how badly things like this could go. Alice agreed to continue paging me anytime Bella was heading to the hospital alone. Bella may not have wanted to worry me, but I couldn’t risk losing her, or having her hurt in any way. She was my life now and my number one priority.

Emmett called me later and we discussed the stranger Bella felt was watching her. “Unfortunately, Edward, unless she has something more concrete, there’s not a lot the department can do. However, I have a couple of buddies that work security at the hospital. I’ll ask them to keep an eye peeled. That’s the best I can do right now.”

We talked for a while longer, when Emmett began whining that Rose made him drop her off at home Halloween night, alone. Apparently, the things Bella said about wanting love instead of just lust made her and Alice stop and think about their relationships.

“Aren’t you dying from a serious case of frustration, man? I know I was. Those hours apart were horrible. But Rose made it up to me, man. She’s as addicted to me as I am to her.” His graphic descriptions of the things they did made even me blush. Emmett was definitely the ‘King of TMI’.

Even though we weren’t doing the sorts of things Emmett and Rosalie were, Bella and I were growing closer day by day. The cats drove us crazy anytime we closed the doors between the apartment and kitchen, so we just left them open, which was fine by me. I felt closer to Bella without the barrier as well. Sebastian preferred the house and Felicity, so I usually only saw him when I was over there. I just gave Bella all his food and stuff, and made sure to buy plenty for both cats. He obviously knew what was good as well as I did.

I woke up early in the morning the day before Thanksgiving to the most delicious aromas and the sound of Bella working in the kitchen. I had been out later than usual making sure the surprise I had planned for after dinner tomorrow was secured, so I was still a bit tired. As I did every morning, I wandered in for coffee, kisses and hugs. She was wearing a little almost-see-through gown, and when I put my arms around her, she responded to me in my favorite way.

Bella’s body was extraordinary. Though I had only seen her nearly nude the one time when she burned herself with hot grease, the vision of her exquisite form was etched in my memory, and I could feel her, firm yet soft, when I pressed her to me, which I did every time I could these days.

Bella made me feel so loved the way she took care of me, like I meant something more to her than just a tenant. I knew I had been attracted to her from the first day I set eyes on her at the hospital, but ever since she took care of me when I was sick, I had grown to depend on her, miss her and worry about her when she wasn’t close to me, and plan every aspect of my life around her and her needs. I wanted her like a man would, or course, but I also wanted my face to be in those pictures next to hers in that album she talked about Halloween night, along with pictures of our beautiful children with my last name and her big brown eyes. I wanted to be next to her on that Carousel, enjoying life’s treasures over and over again. We had started to lay a foundation that would support us forever, and I wanted to build a life with her on it. I was madly, hopelessly in love with her, and told her so when she teased me about only loving her for her cooking and when she confirmed that she loved me, too, everything in the world was suddenly right.

Bella was still upstairs dressing when her parents came to the door. Meeting them for the first time was like being reunited with my own in some ways. Working with Renee in the kitchen brought back fond memories of past holidays with my mom, and Charlie was much like my dad, stoic yet sentimental. I felt a bond with them instantly.

Charlie and Bella ran upstairs to get them settled into the spare room while I was in the kitchen with Renee. She looked up at me, flashing a knowing smile that said she perceived more than was being spoken. “So, Edward, how are you enjoying the little apartment?” she asked with a sly wink and a head nod toward the open doors.

“It’s very nice, Mrs. Swan. Bella is a wonderful landlady.” I couldn’t help the grin on my face, and Renee was as sharp as Bella; she didn’t miss a thing.

“Please, call me Renee or mom. I think either one will work fine. Bella tells me you’re a pediatric doctor. I take it you like children?” she asked innocently, smiling sweetly.

“Very much. They’re the sunshine of this world. Every one of them is a special blessing.” I could see the wheels turning in Renee’s mind.

“That’s a beautiful sentiment, Edward. I want at least two grandchildren, more if you can swing it,” she winked at me. I laughed as she poked me in the ribs.

“I’ll see what I can do, but it’ll be up to Bella and whoever she marries to fulfill those wishes for you.” I felt a sudden twinge of sadness at the thought that it could possibly someone else other than me to father Bella’s children. Again, Renee missed nothing.

“Somehow, I think I’m talking to the right man,” Renee smiled warmly and wrapped an arm around my waist as Bella came into the kitchen and she observed the look that passed between us. “Yeah, I would be willing to bet on it.”

After my conversation with Alice about someone possibly stalking Bella, maybe wanting to take her out of my life, and then the fear that someone else could step into her life and take my place, I vowed to myself right then to keep Bella safe and in my arms where she belonged, and that it wouldn’t be long before I put the ball into motion that would make that permanent.

Chapter: 9

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 9 – Ho Ho OH!

Bella

I made it downstairs quickly to help with dinner preparations. Renee eyed me knowingly, but didn’t ask any questions, for which I was grateful. Had she mentioned the word “coming” one more time, I’m sure I would have needed sedation from the hysterics.

I managed to talk Renee and Charlie into going outside for a few minutes to help me gather some evergreen branches to decorate the dining room, giving Edward a chance to make a dash for his apartment unobserved to shower and change. The state of his thin pajamas would have been a dead giveaway as to what we had been up to, and wouldn’t have gone unnoticed by Renee. I made a mental note to take up a set of Edward’s clothes later, buried in my folded laundry. I’m pretty sure she knew, at least partly, why I insisted on getting them outside, but again she said nothing, just smiled and followed Charlie out the door, glancing up the staircase as she we went.

Thanksgiving dinner was planned for late afternoon, but everyone was invited earlier to enjoy drinks, hors d'oeuvres, and company. The storm last night had quickly turned to a light snow, leaving a white dusting on the grass and trees which sparkled beautifully through the windows. The light in the dining room was warm and inviting, casting a golden glow throughout the room, and the fragrant evergreen boughs blended with the rich aromas of roast turkey and stuffing, pumpkin, and fresh baked yeast rolls.

I smiled as I watched Edward and my father take their places at the table. Charlie, being the senior of the group and traditional head of the table in place of Poppa, directed Edward to the chair at the opposite end, the other place of honor. With everyone seated, Charlie asked us all to join hands for a prayer.

“Lord, thank you so much for the blessings we’ve enjoyed this past year. We’re grateful you’ve allowed us to come together with friends and loved ones this day to remember those blessings and express our gratitude for your generosity with all we have, and for your mercy in those things we’ve fallen short on. Lord, please bless this food that we’ll always know plenty, this home, that its doors are always open to give, and the bonds of love amongst us all here today, so they’ll continue to grow strong and carry us through life’s trials, until we all meet again here next year. Amen”

With a resounding ‘Amen’ from everyone, we began passing the food. Everything was incredibly delicious, especially Edward’s mother’s stuffing. I couldn’t help but look around the table at the faces of all the people who meant the most in the world to me, and I could feel the loving presence of Grammy and Poppa stronger than ever. I was sure they were here enjoying the love in the room as much as I was.

With dinner finished, my favorite part of Thanksgiving Day was at hand. Alice, Esme, and Rosalie helped me gather and put away the fall decoration quickly, and then we headed for the other side of the attic to start pulling out the Christmas boxes. I went looking for Emmett to ask him to pull down the old artificial Christmas tree box when Edward walked up and put his arms around my waist and kissed my neck.

“Wait, I have a surprise for you,” Edward whispered, and slipped out the back door. It was dark now, so I couldn’t see where he had gone, but a few minutes later, he came back towards the house, carrying the most beautiful spruce tree I had ever seen. Emmett and Jasper helped him get it in the door and untie it. Edward went and brought a live tree stand from his apartment, and the guys went about getting it stabilized and placed in the spot I had prepared for the tree in the living room in front of the bay window.

“Oh, Edward, it’s perfect,” I said, standing back to look at the beautiful tree. Edward came to my side, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

“I wanted our first tree together to be special,” he smiled at me, and then pulled a small box out of his pocket and handed it to me. I opened it to reveal a beautiful silver heart ornament with our names and the year engraved on the back. “Our first ornament, the first of many I hope to collect together to pass on to our kids,” he whispered in my ear and kissed me gently. I threw my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss, and forgetting we had an audience.

“Do you two think you could save that for later and let’s get this decorating extravaganza underway?” Rose snickered. Emmett, Jasper, and Alice were all standing there watching us, grinning as well. We finally broke the kiss, and I breathlessly started looking for the box of lights for the tree.

I handed the guys the box of Christmas lights, and then pulled Rose out of the room with me for a moment. Knowing that what was going to happen next would be worth seeing again and possibly be worthy of one of those home video shows, I handed Rose my camera and had her record the action.

The guys were digging through the box of lights trying to decide what to do. Charlie and Carlisle took that as a sign they needed coffee and another piece of pie, so they slipped out of the room, leaving Emmett, Jasper, and Edward to string the lights on the tree. They had obviously played this game before and knew it didn’t always end well.

As I expected, the scene that unfolded was like watching The Three Stooges do Christmas. To watch three capable, intelligent, and otherwise coordinated men become bumbling monkeys trying to string lights on a Christmas tree was worth the sore ribs. Edward had the most effective idea of working the lights into the tree vertically, but Emmett was convinced the old fashioned way of wrapping them around was best, and he caught Jasper off guard and almost tied him to the tree when he tossed a strand of lights over the top, trapping Jasper and pulling him into the tree. Alice and Renee were in tears, and Esme was laughing and trying to hold the girls ears, growling at Emmett when he forgot they were there and let an expletive fly.

The guys eventually got the lights on, and even without the ornaments, the tree was spectacular. Edward had truly gotten an exquisite tree. It was tall and stately, with just enough room at the top to get the angel on without it touching the high ceiling.

Alice, Esme, and the older girls set about hanging ornaments on the tree while Rose and I pulled out the other decorations, handing them to the guys and directing their placement throughout the house. While everyone was busy decorating, Edward left the room for a minute, and then came back with a florist box, handing it to me with a grin. I opened the box to discover fresh sprigs of mistletoe tied with ribbons for hanging. Poppa would have truly loved Edward, being a man after his own heart, and mine.

The guys took great delight in hanging the mistletoe. They dangled it in all the usual places, plus a couple I wouldn’t have thought of. Most of the old light fixtures in the house had pull chains, and I don’t think there were many left without a mistletoe sprig hanging from them. Every time one of us girls got near a sprig, we were given the appropriate attention. Even Charlie and Carlisle snuck in a couple of kisses on Renee and Esme.

The guys finally drifted off into the family room, joining Charlie and Carlisle in front of a football game, while we finished with the tree. Rosalie still had my camera handy, and captured the tranquil scene of all the men asleep. Carlisle had fallen asleep on the couch and Dorianne had climbed up on his chest and fallen asleep as well. Edward was asleep in the recliner with Marisol curled up in his arms. I couldn’t wait for that baby sleeping in his arms to be ours.

It was fairly late and the snow had picked up, so I invited everyone just stay for the night. There were two more bedrooms upstairs, so Rose and Emmett took one and Alice and Jasper took the other. The girls were excited about sleeping on the sofas in sleeping bags so they could stay up a while and watch ‘How the Grinch Stole Christmas’ and work on making out their Christmas wish lists. I suggested Edward give his apartment to Esme and Carlisle, and they took Dorianne with them and went off through the closet door to bed. Renee and Charlie gave me a look as they passed us in the hall, but didn’t say anything as Edward and I headed into my bedroom and closed the door.

“I remembered to grab these for you,” I said to Edward as I handed him a pair of sleep pants. He grinned and took them from me and headed to the bathroom. He came back out with a puzzled look on his face.

“Do you usually have a guy at the other sink in here?” he asked as he pulled me into the bathroom. I grinned as he pointed to the men’s toiletries and new toothbrush on the counter. I had picked them up while I was shopping the other day and slipped them out on the counter earlier this afternoon for him.

“Not usually, but I’m planning to more often,” I said, looking at him with a smile. He pulled me into a warm embrace, kissing my forehead.

“You‘re amazing, you know,” he smiled down at me, kissing my cheeks. “What would I do without you?”

“I hope we never have to find out,” I whispered.

“Me, too,” he said as he kissed me again.

Edward had gone into the bathroom to get ready for bed, and I took my shoes off and was undressing when he came back into the bedroom. It was so natural being with him I didn’t even think twice about standing there bare, searching through the drawer for a nightshirt, until I looked up in the mirror and saw Edward staring at me with his mouth open. I pulled a gown out of the drawer and walked over next to the bed, unfolding it casually as I enjoyed watching him watch me.

“God, Bella, you’re so beautiful,” he whispered as he looked up at me, fire in his eyes. He stepped towards me, but stopped when I didn’t put the gown on immediately. I tossed it onto the end of the bed and pulled the covers back, climbing in and patting the bed next to me. He joined me, taking me in his arms for another deep, passionate kiss.

“Bella, I don’t know if this is such a good idea. You’re just too irresistible. It’s taking everything I have not to…”

“Shhh, it’s ok,” I whispered, trying to calm him down, “If it’s too much, then we won’t do this again, at least not until…”

“You’re my wife,” he said, looking into my eyes with so much love it made my heart skip. “And you will be, soon.”

Did he just propose to me?

“I’ll be right back,” Edward whispered, kissing me quickly and getting up shakily, slipping his jeans on before leaving my room. He was only gone a few minutes before he came back. He came to my side of the bed and knelt down, opening a small velvet box. Inside was the most beautiful vintage diamond ring I had ever seen.

“Bella, I was planning on doing this in a more romantic fashion, with dinner, candles, music, and the works, but I just can’t wait any longer to know if you’ll be mine forever,” he smiled, taking my hand. “My dad left this in Carlisle’s care until he thought I would need it. This was my mother’s ring, and I’m certain she would be as honored as I would be if you would wear it as my wife. Bella, will you marry me?”

Not even thinking about the fact that I was still almost naked, I sprung out of bed and into Edward’s arms, knocking us both over onto the floor with a loud, shaking thud.

“Yes, Edward, I’ll marry you,” I giggled as I plastered kisses all over his face and neck, laying on top of him. He sat up with me in his lap and slipped the ring on my finger, then pulled me into an embrace. His back was to my bedroom door, which was good, because the door suddenly opened, my mom standing there wide eyed and a bit panicked, with both her ear plugs in her hand.

“Bella, I felt that all the way down the hall. It sounded like you fell…” Renee stopped in mid sentence, her mouth hanging open. “Am I interrupting something?”

All she could see was my bare legs and arms wrapped around Edward, but she figured out the rest. I just grinned and waved my left hand at her. “No, we were just getting engaged is all.” Spotting the ring on my finger, she started to come towards us, but I held up my other hand. “Mom, don’t come any closer. Just go back to bed and we can talk about it in the morning,” I grinned at her over Edward’s shoulder.

“Getting ‘engaged’, huh? Yeah, I can see that,” she gestured sarcastically and grinned as she closed the door shaking her head. I could hear her footsteps shuffling quickly down the hall and I knew if Charlie wasn’t already awake, he would be in a few seconds.

I was the first one up just after sunrise, and was glad to see the road plows had been busy during the night clearing the roads. I started the coffee and breakfast, excited to have so many guests to serve this morning. Edward soon joined me in the kitchen and began pouring batter into the two hot antique waffle irons Poppa had found for Grammy at an antique shop. The aroma of fresh coffee brought everyone stumbling into the kitchen, Renee and Charlie entering last. Renee looked at me and Edward, grinning from ear to ear.

“So, did you two have a good night?” Renee asked innocently, picking up my left hand to get a closer look at my ring. Alice, Esme, and Rose noticed Renee holding my hand and surrounded me, trying to see what she was looking at.

“Is that an engagement ring?” Rose squealed, grabbing my hand to look at it closer. “It’s beautiful, Bella!” Everyone gathered around Edward and I, hugging and congratulating us.

Esme was in tears as she hugged Edward. “I wish your mom could be here for this,” she whispered. “She would have loved Bella very much, I’m sure of it. Your father, too.”

“I know they would have,” Edward said, a tear escaping down his cheek. Esme brushed it away, smiling. Jasper and Carlisle shook his hand, but Emmett grabbed him up into a huge brotherly bear hug.

“My brother’s getting married! Man, I can’t believe it. Finally!” Emmett laughed, hugging Edward again. “You know what this means, bro… Bachelor party!”

Edward turned red, knowing what Emmett was capable of, and began laying down the law about what he would and wouldn’t be a party to, which was definitely putting a damper on Emmett’s enthusiastic planning.

“We haven’t even set a date yet,” Edward insisted, glancing over at me. “Bella?”

“I hadn’t really thought about it yet. I don’t really want anything big or elaborate, unless you do,” I answered. Edward just shook his head as he looked around the room.

“Most of the people I would want to invite are right here in this room, and a small wedding is all I want, too,” Edward agreed. “How about next weekend?”

Alice was on her feet jumping up and down before anyone could say anything else. “Oh, no you don’t, Edward Masen! Even if it has to be a small wedding, it should still be planned out properly,” Alice growled at him, making Edward grin. “Bella’s waited this long to wear white, and she should have the cake, the dress, and the whole thing, even if it is small scale!” Renee, Esme, and Rosalie were standing right behind her, nodding in agreement. I could tell this was going to get out of hand in a hurry if we didn’t put some boundaries on it.

“Fine, but seriously, nothing extravagant. Give us a chance to talk through what we want and we’ll let you know how much torture you’re allowed to inflict on us,” I offered, laughing as they seemed not to be hearing me. “I mean it, mom,” I glared at her.

“Bella, dear, whatever are you talking about?” Renee purred at me, and I knew we were screwed if we didn’t act fast.

With breakfast finished and cleaned up, everyone was getting ready to leave. Alice and Rose were planning on getting together later with the guys to start Christmas shopping, and asked Edward and I to join them. The day after Thanksgiving was not my idea of fun, so we agreed to join them Saturday morning at the mall. Apparently there was some big promotion and sale they wanted to be there for, so we agreed to meet bright and early.

Esme offered to take Renee sightseeing, so they left for the day, leaving Charlie at home to enjoy a day’s worth of football and newspaper in peace. Edward and I spent the next few hours working around the house and finished putting out the rest of the Christmas decorations. As we worked, we talked about the kind of wedding we wanted and decided we wanted to have it here in the house. Neither of us wanted to wait and suffer through endless months, so we decided on Valentine’s Day. If a modest wedding couldn’t be done by then, we were prepared to elope.

Finished with our chores, we wandered into the parlor, where Edward sat down at his piano and began gently playing Christmas carols while I sat next to him, both of us deep in thought.

“This used to be my mom’s favorite carol,” Edward said, as he began a beautiful rendition of Silent Night. “She used to sing it every year at the church Christmas party. She had an amazing voice,” he whispered, blinking back the moisture in his eyes. I wrapped my arms around him, and he stopped playing and pulled me into a gentle, passionate kiss.

“They would have been so happy, Bella. I know they would have loved you as much as I do,” he murmured into my neck, holding me close to him.

“They’re here, Edward, I can feel them, and they’ll be at our wedding, too,” I smiled up at him. Edward seemed to remember something at that point.

“Bella, do you know about an old trunk in the attic that was your grandmother’s?” I vaguely remembered an old trunk in the corner of the attic with some old picture frames stacked on top of it.

“I think so, but I’ve never looked inside it. But, how did you know about it? I don’t recall you ever going up there,” I asked, curious and confused. He just smiled at me and winked mischievously.

“I’ve been having conversations with ghosts. How else would I know about it?” he teased. “Go check it out. I think you might find your wedding dress in there,” he grinned, and went back to playing. Totally confused, I looked at him and shook my head, and then got up and went to find Charlie.

“Dad, do you know anything about an old trunk of Grammy’s in the attic?” I asked, still wondering how Edward really knew anything about it. Charlie laid down his paper and thought about it for a while, then smiled.

“I think I know the one you’re talking about, and what’s in it.” He was grinning from ear to ear now. “Come with me.”

We made our way into the old attic, weaving through stacks of what could best be described as junk, but things adored by Grammy and Poppa. I really should clean it out, but I just didn’t have the heart to toss out their ‘treasures’. Back in the far corner of the attic, underneath a pile of old picture frames and dusty knickknacks, was the huge old trunk.

We cleared the top of it off, and Charlie suggested we drag the whole trunk out of the attic to avoid getting the contents dirty. We dragged it into my bedroom, and I grabbed a wet cloth to wipe it down before opening it. It had been sealed tight for many years, and when we opened it up, I couldn’t believe what was inside.

I reached in and pulled out a bundle wrapped in heavy white cotton. I laid it out on the bed and began carefully unwrapping the ties that held it together. I peeled back the cotton, revealing the most beautiful vintage wedding gown I had ever seen. Charlie’s eyes sparkled and glistened with moisture as I held it up to me, turning to look in the long mirror in the corner.

“It’s so beautiful, Bells,” Charlie said softly. “I had only seen it in my parent’s and grandparent’s wedding pictures. They didn’t do it justice.”

“This belonged to my great-grandmother as well?” I marveled, amazed that it was so well preserved. “How old is it exactly?”

“I’m guessing close to the turn of the last century, give or take a few years,” Charlie answered.

The dress had a very Victorian flair, high necked with lots of lace, and very elegant. It was obviously well made with good quality material and well cared for to have survived all these years. I grabbed a couple of clips and piled my hair up in a loose twist, and then Charlie grinned and turned around while I pulled my shirt off and slipped the dress over my head. In the bottom of the trunk was the slip and undergarments that went with the dress, plus a beautiful beaded garland headpiece that looked like it was designed to hold flowers on the sides with a veil attached. I slipped it on over my hair, and then turned to let Charlie button up the back. I moved again in front of the mirror to survey the fit. That’s when Charlie lost it.

“I can’t believe my baby’s getting married,” Charlie murmured into my hair as I held onto him, starting to cry myself. The front door opened and I heard Renee and Esme’s voices downstairs. They had stopped to speak to Edward, then came running up the stairs, stopping in my bedroom doorway.

When I turned to face my mother, she was rendered speechless, which was an accomplishment where Renee was concerned. Esme was holding her hand over her mouth, tears streaming down her face. She heard Edward’s footsteps on the stairs and slipped out of the room, quickly closing the door behind her. “Bad luck…” was all she was able to choke out as she left. The dress fit as if it had been specially made just for me. I stood there staring at it with Renee and Charlie on either side of me, both in tears by now.

“You’re going to get married here in the house, aren’t you?” Renee finally asked. “It’s perfect, from about the same time period as when this house was built. Lots of antique roses, I think…” she trailed off, wiping her eyes and heading towards the door to start making her lists of what to do for decorations.

“We’ve decided on Valentine’s Day, mom” I called after her. She spun around, eyes wide.

“Bella, that’s only a few weeks from now! How are we…” she stammered, frustrated by the short notice.

“It’s either that date, or we elope. We’re not waiting any longer than that,” I said firmly. She threw her hands up and spun around, running from the room.

“We have to hurry then. That’s a popular wedding date and everything will be booked if we don’t get started immediately!” She was off down the hall and I heard her squawking to Esme in a panic about the ideas she had already come up with. The two of them headed downstairs, no doubt to start planning their phone calls for next week.

“And she’s off…” Charlie giggled, unbuttoning the dress so I could take it off. He stopped at the door, “You’re going to make a beautiful bride, Bells,” he said softly, smiling as he pulled the door shut behind him. I knew he was happy for me, but his heart was heavy at the thought of losing his ‘baby’. That first brown eyed grandson with the head full auburn curls should cheer him up.

I wrapped the dress back up in the cotton fabric and laid it aside, and then went to look at the rest of the things in the chest. The chest itself was actually a beautiful old leather piece, and I decided to condition it and keep it in my room. Beneath the dress underpinnings I found a carved wooden box. Inside was what looked like a string bound leather book, a bible, some pearl and blue crystal encrusted hair combs, an ancient coin, and an old, yellowed lace trimmed ladies handkerchief.

I gently opened the string bound book to find several tiny flowers, dried and brittle with age, pressed inside the cover under a piece of silk. It appeared to be a diary of sorts. I turned to the next page to read the words my great grandmother had written more than ninety years prior:

May 18th, 1916

Today is the happiest day of my life. My sweetheart, Charles, asked me to be his bride. Mother and father were thrilled to see me so happy. Father knows what a good man Charles is, and gave his blessings to our nuptials.

As happy as I am, I am still frightened about the war overseas. There are rumors abound saying America will be involved before long. The thought of losing my dearest Charles to war breaks my heart. I hope to give him a child before this happens. I love him so and cannot bear the thought of him leaving this earth without someone to carry forth his name.

Our wedding is in a few weeks and mother talked to aunt Liddy about her wedding gown. It was from a few years ago, but seeing as we are not a people of great means, it would do fine for me. I suppose it could be the item I ‘borrowed’, as the old wives’ tale dictates for good luck. Grandmother gave me an old coin grandpa gave to her to save for a ‘rainy’ day for my ‘something old’, and mother promised to make a set of new underpinnings for the dress as my ‘something new’. For something blue, I think I will gather some of the tiny blue flowers from the edge of the garden and wear them with the veil.

To my sweet daughters and granddaughters, I do hope I am able to one day read this back with you, if only over your shoulder in spirit, and share this joy with you so that you know you come from a long line of love.

If you are reading this in preparation for your wedding, may you have found the man that will fill your life with joy, your arms with many babies, and your heart with the knowledge that he loves you, forever.

Blessings to you, my loves,

Marie

In that moment, I was certain I could feel her presence in the room. “Thanks, Grandma Marie, I think I found him,” I whispered, and was filled with an incredible sense of joy and love. She knew.

I continued to look through the diary, stopping to read an entry here and there, enjoying my great grandmothers recollections of her wedding day, and even chuckling as she tried to give advice on the ‘wedding night’ in a day-after entry as best she could given the language and standards of the era. It was very cryptic, but I got the message. In her day, the things she said would have probably been deemed scandalous, but I found them downright hysterical. I hoped she didn’t mind me laughing! There was a gentle knock on the door, and Edward poked his head in, glancing around.

“Is the coast clear?” he grinned. “I wouldn’t want to incur any bad luck.”

“It’s fine. Come on in,” I grinned back at him, patting the bed beside me. He came and sat down, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me against him.

“So, how is this going to work now,” he asked, glancing towards the bed. “Am I exiled back to my lonely apartment, or do you want me in here with you?”

“As much as I want you with me, I think we better have you sleeping down there until the wedding if we want me to truly be worthy of this dress,” I said, patting the bundle. “By the way, tell me seriously. How did you know about it? As far as I know, you’ve never been to the attic before.”

“Your Grammy told me to tell you it was there,” he smiled down at me.

“Grammy?” I asked, not understanding how that could be.

“Do you remember the first day I was so sick a while back?” he asked, looking down at his hands. “I was pretty delirious, but I had this crazy dream…no, actually, I don’t think it was a dream at all. My parents came to me, giving me their blessings for us to be together, as did your Grammy and Poppa. That’s when she told me about the dress in the trunk in the attic. You were meant to have it, Bella. They’ve approved all along and have just been waiting patiently for us to figure it out for ourselves.”

I knew every word he spoke was the truth. He kissed my forehead gently, and then pulled me into his arms for the sweetest hug he had ever given me. Sleeping alone for the next few weeks was going to be hard.

I woke up Saturday morning to the sound of banging on my front door. The sun was barely coming up, so I knew it had to be seriously early, and cold. Whoever’s at that door at this hour deserves to have me take my time letting them in! I growled to myself. Thankfully, Edward heard the noise and answered it before they woke the entire neighborhood.

“Why aren’t you guys ready yet?” I heard Alice screeching from the bottom of the stairs. I knew it was only a matter of seconds before I was pounced on, so I braced myself. Sure enough, my bedroom door flew open and Alice landed her perky little butt right next to me on the mattress, almost bouncing me out onto the floor.

“Crap, Alice, why are you here so early?” I moaned, trying to pull the pillows over my head. Rose joined her, and they both launched into a tickle attack that almost made me wet the bed. The banking of my bed against the wall was loud enough to wake Renee despite her earplugs, and she came to my doorway, laughing at the sight of me writhing on the bed, being tickled mercilessly by my two attackers.

“Mommy, help!” I screamed, “Make them stop!” I was gasping for breath now, laughing so hard I was about to lose total bladder control. I managed to scramble away and dash into my bathroom, locking the door behind me and hitting the toilet just in time.

“You two are some friends, attacking me first thing in the morning! You know how it is when you first wake up! That was mean, almost making me wet my bed!” I screamed at them through the bathroom door. The voice I heard in response was not one I was expecting.

“So, Bella, do we need to pick you up some incontinence pants while we’re out today?” Emmett snickered outside my bathroom door. Crap!

“Emmett, unless you’re standing outside that door with a giant cup of coffee, I suggest you get back downstairs before I come out of here…” I threatened. “You’re girlfriend is already in enough trouble as it is!”

I could hear Emmett’s booming laughter as he went downstairs, and I peeked out my bathroom door to see the only one left in my room was Alice. She was sitting up in the middle of my bed, grinning.

“Esme told us you have a dress already. So, let me see it!” she exclaimed, bouncing up and down on my bed. I opened the ancient trunk and took out the bundle and unwrapped it, holding the dress up so Alice could get a better look.

“Oh, Bella, it’s beautiful!” Alice squealed, taking in the intricate lace and needlework, “You’re going to look so amazing in this.” Rose came back in and sat next to Alice, looking thoughtfully at the dress and the other things in the trunk.

While I was getting dressed, I told them how I found it and about Edward’s ‘visitation’ from his parents and my grandparents while he was sick. I also let them read the amazing entry in my great grandmother’s diary, which brought both of them to tears. They both grabbed me up into a huge girly group hug before we headed downstairs to join everyone else.

Charlie and Renee were heading out later to visit the cemetery, and then meeting up with some old friends for lunch, so we left them with their coffee and headed out for the mall. For some reason, I felt the need to grab my camera, knowing intuitively this was going to be a day to remember.

The mall parking lot was already packed by eight o’clock with early Christmas shoppers, so it took us a while to find a parking space. Parking this time of year was like playing a bizarre game of musical chairs. Some teeny bopper in a tiny sports car tried to squeeze around us and steal the space Emmett had been scoping for several minutes while the occupants of the space tried to wrangle a bunch of unruly kids into their car. Emmett had borrowed a fellow officer’s suburban for the day so we could all ride together and have room for packages, so it wasn’t like the kid couldn’t see us waiting, turn signal engaged. When the teen cut into the parking space in front of Emmett, he simply put the suburban in park, still in the aisle, and went and stood outside the kid’s car door, arms crossed over his massive chest, and waited for him to come out of the car, glaring through his window at him the whole time.

After a few minutes at a standoff, the kid rolled down his window no more than an inch, and whatever Emmett said to him convinced him that he really wanted to find another spot. Emmett returned to the suburban and waited while they backed out and drove away, allowing Emmett to park.

“What did you say to him?” Edward asked laughing, knowing it was probably something good.

“I just promised him some extensive body work if he chose to stay in that spot,” Emmett grinned. “I guess he didn’t want to have to explain to his old man how his front fender ended up in his tailpipe.” The kid was wise to move.

There were few things about Christmas I really disliked, but this had to be one of them. There were so many people shopping today, it was hard to move through the mall. Everyone seemed to have turned out for the early bird specials this morning, packing the place to what surely had to be near capacity. The atmosphere was almost stifling, and my claustrophobia was starting to kick in.

We had come in on the upper level, and as we rounded a balcony area that overlooked the courtyard below, Emmett yelled and pointed, “There it is!” We all looked over the railing to see what he was so excited about. Down in the center of the Atrium was a huge Christmas display, complete with Santa Claus, live reindeer, and lots of Santa’s helpers. The fact that it was sponsored by Victoria’s Secret was what had Emmett drooling on his shoes. He practically ran down the escalator to get a closer look at the festivities going on downstairs, the rest of us following at a normal human pace. We joined the crowd that had gathered to watch as ‘Santa’ ushered one good ‘little girl’ after another onto his lap to hear what they wanted for Christmas. Most of them giggled and flirted with the fake Santa, and he seemed to enjoy all the attention. At least that’s how it appeared.

Santa happened to be a drop dead gorgeous hot guy dressed up in the suit, and Mrs. Claus was in a short red mini skirt and bikini top with fur trim that barely covered anything. The more Emmett watched, the more pissed he got that it was only women who were getting in line to make their requests. After reasoning with Rose that he had Christmas wishes that needed fulfilling as well, he handed Rose his coat, deciding to get in on the action. I got my camera out and started recording. I had the distinct feeling this was going to be epic.

Emmett was several people back, but I could see that Santa was watching him intently, most probably dreading having all two hundred twenty plus pounds of Emmett landing in his lap. It was finally Emmett’s turn, and I started recording as all the helpers gathered around to give him candy and lead him up to Santa’s lap, squeezing his arms and fondling his chest and abs as he went. Alice and Jasper literally had to hold Rose back to keep her from making Santa short a few helpers for the day.

“My goodness, what a big boy you are,” Santa purred at Emmett, who was too busy enjoying the helpers to notice that Santa wasn’t paying attention to Mrs. Claus anymore. In fact, he hadn’t been paying any attention to her at all. It became obvious very quickly that Emmett was his preferred flavor of lollipop.

“And what would you like for Christmas, gorgeous?” he asked, wrapping his arms around Emmett casually. Emmett was just starting to get the picture, when all of a sudden he jumped straight up and started swearing at the touchy feely Santa at the top of his lungs.

“What the hell…? Did you just poke your finger in my crack, you sick pervert!?” Emmett yelled. “What kind of freakin’ fudge packer are you!?”

Emmett went to lunge at the guy, ready to rip him a new one, when Edward and Jasper tackled him, dragging him away from the display to keep him from beating Santa into a bloody pulp in front of all the kids, and before mall security could haul him off for assault. We could hear Santa scream “Bitch!” at Emmett as the guys fought to keep a hold on him. Emmett was still swearing at him from three stores away.

I caught it all on video.

We managed to get Emmett far enough away from the overly friendly Santa so he would calm down, and decided that section of the mall was definitely off limits for a few hours until they closed up the display. Santa didn’t know just how close he came to getting a north pole shoved up his rear. Who knows, maybe that’s what he was hoping for…

With Emmett finally in control of himself enough to act civilized, we split off into guys and girls to shop in earnest. Alice, Rose, and I started walking, window shopping mostly, and talking about wedding plans. Rose interjected occasionally, but was quiet for the most part. We stopped for a drink and then sat on a bench to rest our feet for a minute, and I finally asked, “Rose, is something the matter?” She looked at me, surprised, and then a sad smile spread across her face.

“No, nothing really. I guess I’m actually just a little bit jealous,” she admitted. “You’re so lucky.” I couldn’t imagine why she would be jealous of me. She had everything I ever wanted: brains, brawn, and beauty beyond measure. Why should she be jealous of me?

“I don’t understand, Rose, why…?” I started to ask, but she interrupted.

“Bella, I’m madly, hopelessly in love with Emmett. I would give anything to be standing in your shoes, certain the man you love is in love with you, too. Emmett hasn’t actually said anything outright about being in love with me,” she said, tears running down her face.

“I hope this says it all,” a deep voice said behind her. We all looked around to see our guys standing behind us, Emmett holding a small satin box out to Rose. The throngs of people around us stopped to stair as Emmett came around in front of Rose and got down on one knee, taking her hand. “Rose, I’ve been carrying this thing around with me for days trying to figure out how to tell you how much I love you without sounding like a complete idiot. Well, here I am, your idiot, and I love you, too. Will you marry me, Rose?”

“You are an idiot, Emmett Cullen, and I do love you,” she giggled through her tears. “Yes, I’ll be Mrs. Idiot!”

Emmett slipped the diamond ring on her finger and pulled her into an enthusiastic kiss as the mall erupted into whoops, whistles, and applause. Jasper pulled Alice into his arms and whispered something in her ear. She looked happy as a grin came across her face, and she wrapped her tiny arms around his neck for a deep kiss of their own. Edward took me into his arms, saying, “When in Rome…” and pulled me into him for a passionate kiss as well. The whole food court was cheering now.

We shopped for a while longer, picking up a few gifts and things before deciding to call it a day. On the way out, we passed by a bridal store and Rose decided she wanted to try on a dress just for fun. Alice wanted to join her, which took Rose and I both by surprise. The guys went to check out the music store across from the bridal shop, leaving us to try on dresses. Jasper turned and winked at Alice as he followed the guys into the music store.

“I have a feeling something’s going on here you’re not sharing with us, Miss Brandon,” Rose smirked, poking Alice in the shoulder. “What’s up with you and Jasper?”

“Oh, nothing, it’s just that we got engaged a couple of days ago, but my ring is at the jeweler being resized, so we were going to wait until I had it to say anything, but since there’s all this love in the air going on today,” she gestured wildly with her hands over her head, “I thought I would go ahead and just let the cat out of the bag.”

“ALICE!” we both squealed, grabbing her up into a huge hug. “You little sneak! How dare you hold out on us!” Rose teased. Alice was giggling and bouncing up and down with Rose, happy she finally told us and could quit trying to keep it a secret. We wandered on into the bridal store and they started looking through gowns while I wandered back to the trousseau section. Looking through the nightgowns and undergarments, I remembered I still had the beautiful teddy set and exquisite gown Alice and Rose had given me for my birthday back in September tucked away in a drawer, unused.

I smiled to myself as I thought about having an occasion soon to finally wear them.

Edward

After Bella left to go downstairs to help her mom start Thanksgiving dinner, I started to head down the stairs to my apartment to shower and change, but stopped dead in my tracks when I looked down at the condition I was in. Not good. I stood there contemplating whether I should borrow Bella’s bathrobe or just make a dash for it. Unfortunately, said dash would route me right past a very observant Renee, and a possibly armed Charlie. Crap!

My dilemma was solved when I heard Bella enthusiastically herding her parents out the front door on a scavenger hunt for natural décor for the table. Not only beautiful, but brilliant! As soon as the front door closed, I shot like a bullet down the stairs, hurdling Felicity and Sebastian in the kitchen as I slid through the closet door, shutting my side behind me.

I sat down on my bed for a minute, laughing at the predicament I had gotten myself into. Thoughts of Bella in my arms, though, had me ready and willing to risk getting caught again. I would even chance Charlie having brought his service revolver with him to be able to hold her again like we did this morning and feel her body against mine. I reached under my bed and pulled out a bin, removing the small box Carlisle had handed me the day of Dorianne’s birthday party. My mother’s rings. I wanted Bella to have them, and soon. I began formulating in my mind how I wanted to ask her to be mine forever. Bella deserved the best, most perfect proposal I could offer her, and I only hoped her answer would be what I wanted to hear. I tucked the box into my dresser and headed into the shower.

I had just gotten out and finished dressing when my phone rang with a call I had been waiting for. “Hey, Jasper.”

“Morning, Edward. How’s it going with the future in-laws?” Jasper asked with a laugh in his pronounced southern drawl. I could tell he was in a great mood as his fun side was seriously showing.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I bluffed playfully. He knew I was full of it.

“Yeah, right. Whatever, man. Anyway, I picked up the stuff you asked me to, but I’m going to have a hell of a time hiding it from Alice until tonight. If you don’t want your surprise ruined, I had better swing by and drop it off there before I go pick her up.”

“That’s a good idea, just come down the alley to the back. Thanks for doing all the running for me, Jasper. I never could have pulled this off without your help.”

He was just around the corner, so I made sure everyone was pre-occupied before slipping out the apartment door. I motioned Jasper up the back drive and we unloaded. Friends with pickups were a godsend! He handed me the three smaller boxes and I took them inside with me to hide them until tonight. I knew Bella didn’t like surprises much, but I was pretty sure she would like this one.

Just before everyone arrived for dinner, Charlie pulled me aside. “Edward, how do you want to work the table this year?” I looked at Charlie, totally confused, so he continued. “It’s always been our tradition to have the patriarch of the household sit at the head of the table and offer the blessing. My dad always did it when he was alive, and then after he passed, I took over. However, since you’re here now as man of the house, I thought I’d see if there were any traditions of your own you may want to incorporate.”

I was certain my grin couldn’t have gotten any bigger as Charlie referred to me as the man of this household. “Thank you, Charlie. Why don’t you do the honors for us this year, since I’m not officially ‘man of the house’ here, at least not yet. However, by next year I hope to have stepped into that roll, if I could have your blessing to do so.”

Charlie clapped me on the back with a huge grin, his bright eyes sparkling. “You most certainly have my blessing, Edward. I can see just how happy you make my little girl, and you seem like a fine young man. I think you were both made for each other.”

Thanksgiving dinner was wonderful. What made it so special for me was being surrounded by people I loved and who loved me. All the time I spent away in Maryland, the holidays were very hard for me. Not being with loved ones made it lonely and my least favorite time of year. Not anymore. As I looked around the table at the faces of the people who meant the most in the world to me, I was certain this was where I wanted to be for as long as God would let me have space on the Earth.

I was right that Bella loved my surprise. Our first Christmas tree together was going to look spectacular once it was finished. As the girls were putting away the fall décor in preparation for decorating for Christmas, I pulled Jasper and Emmett into the living room for a man huddle. Emmett usually seemed to understand what was going on, but with his ability to blissfully miss the point sometimes, I was concerned for what we were about to embark on in the presence of children. Nothing like a few sunny expletives for the kids to pick up and repeat around holiday guests.

“Ok, guys, they’re about to start pulling out the Christmas stuff. Are you ready?” Jasper and Emmett both looked at me like I was a moron.

“Ready for what, dude? We’re just decorating a freaking tree. What’s there to be ready for?” Ah, sweet, simple Emmett…

“Let me put it this way, Emmett. Chances are good they’re about to hand us a box of Christmas tree lights. If those lights were put away last year by a man, they were probably wrapped neatly, secured tightly so they wouldn’t unwind and tangle, and stacked in such a way as to be able to tell one strand from the next. However…” They were both starting to get where I was headed with this. “If the girls took them off the tree last time, I will be willing to bet they shoved them all in the box together and planned on just buying new ones this year. But, since they have us here, they’re going to expect us to be able to deal with it. Do you get the picture now?”

Carlisle and Charlie had wandered into the room and were listening to our planning session, grinning like they knew exactly what we were talking about. Sure enough, Bella came into the room with a big box marked ‘Xmas Lights’ and handed them to us, then turned around and slipped out of the room with Rose. I could see them snickering over Bella’s camera and knew what they were up to. When Carlisle and Charlie exited the room, I was half tempted to look for smoke from the fire they were trying to get away from.

“Ok, gents, it’s show time,” I muttered low enough the girls couldn’t hear. “Don’t look now but you’re on candid camera.”

At least Jasper had a clue. Emmett, on the other hand, gave the girls enough footage of his buffoonery to keep them laughing for days afterward. After today, I plotted to pay extra next year for a pre-strung tree. This circus of lights wasn’t happening again.

I was a surgeon, not an electrician, or a ringmaster.

Chapter: 10

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 10 – Wishes Fulfilled

Bella

We headed home so Edward could get in a quick nap before having to go in to work. He was on night call for the next week, which I tried not to think about. The thought of being alone in the house at night was near unbearable these days for some reason, even if he wasn’t in my bed. Night call meant he would be gone from the house before I got home, and not be back until after I had left for work in the mornings. I tried not to show how much this affected me, but Edward knew me well enough by now to see through my brave face.

“It’s only for a week,” he whispered into my hair as we curled up on his bed for a nap. “It will all be over before you know it.” I knew Edward was trying to comfort me, but somehow his words only made me more uneasy.

I hadn’t even left the house yet before ‘Blue Monday’ was upon me. Rose called me at home giving me directions to a house Alice and I were to meet her at as soon as we could get there.

Alice and I arrived at the same time, making our way past the police barricades and into the house Rose had called us to. The remnants of a fire on one side of the small frame house were being extinguished as we walked up. A neighbor had first heard a noise and then saw smoke, summoning the fire department there quickly.

The smell of old feces and urine mixed with smoke and strong chemical odors made the air near toxic, and we were wading through piles of dirty clothes, trash, and all manner of god only knows what to find Rose. We located her in a back bedroom where she was holding three children, all very small and emaciated. The youngest of them was a tiny infant, not more than a week old. The baby girl was covered with sores and looked seriously dehydrated. The other two children, a little boy maybe just over a year old, clung terrified to the older little boy who was no more than four. It was days like this I hated my job. No, not my job; irresponsible people.

“This was a meth lab,” Rose said as she handed the baby to me. “Poor things don’t look like they’ve had a decent meal in days. They’re lucky to be alive. They contained the fire before the whole house exploded.”

The baby reeked of stale urine and her clothes were filthy. She was wearing a makeshift diaper that looked like one of the other children had tried to change her. Rose pulled me aside to tell me that the worst one, another older girl, was outside in an ambulance. She picked up the older boy, and Alice got the younger one, and we headed outside, getting them into the back of another ambulance to get them out of the cold as quickly as possible, since they had almost nothing on.

We arrived at the hospital and the ER staff took over care of the children while Rose finished briefing us on the situation. The second ambulance pulled up, and they unloaded a stretcher with a little girl on it who was about six. Cuts and shards of glass were embedded into her face everywhere except around her eyes. She also had burns in several places on her tiny body. The paramedic was holding a compress to the side of her forehead, covering a gaping, recessed wound.

“From what we’ve been able to gather so far, the adults running the lab left to make a sale, leaving the oldest child to watch the younger ones,” Rose said as she watched them moving the girl into the ER. “The firefighters found her lying in a pile of glass wearing these, probably playing with them.”

Rose held up a pair of dark sunglasses, the lenses cracked and badly scratched from being hit by flying glass. “That’s all that saved her eyes, but it’s also probably what caused her to trip, knocking into things and causing the explosion and fire. If ever I doubted guardian angels, I don’t anymore. Even as bad as things are right now, this probably saved all their lives.”

The explosion had shattered a large bottle in every direction, sending the bottom of it as a projectile at the child’s head, as well as the smaller shards of glass. Had she not been wearing the glasses, she would have been blinded.

Edward had already left when they called him back to the hospital to treat the girl. She had to be rushed into surgery immediately to stem the bleeding from the head wound and remove glass and bone shards that were inverted into her brain matter from the blow to her skull.

Rose and Alice went back to the office to start making phone calls trying to determine the children’s names and other information we would need to get them cared for. I stayed at the hospital as liaison, watching over the other children and awaiting word on the little girl in surgery.

The nurses called me back to the NICU to see the infant girl. They had bathed her and treated her sores, and she was now wailing away, hungry. I washed up and slipped on scrubs, and the NICU nurse handed the tiny bundle to me. I sat down in a rocking chair in the nursery and fed her a bottle while I rocked her, gently humming a tune I had heard Edward playing on the piano late at night. She was a voracious eater, and stared up at me with huge eyes of a nondescript color. She was very fair, with tufts of downy light blond hair, and absolutely beautiful. Esme had come to the hospital to join Carlisle for lunch and came to the nursery when she heard one of the nurses mention my name. I looked up to see her at the window, grinning at me. I asked the nurse if she could see the baby, and they let her scrub and gown up and come in.

“Where’s Dorianne?” I whispered, smiling up from the rocker.

“Carlisle has her. She’s busy charming the pants off the other pediatricians as we speak,” she giggled softly, leaning down to look at the baby in my arms. “It suits you well,” Esme smiled. “You’re going to be an incredible mother some day, hopefully soon,” she added.

“Let me get married first, ok?” I grinned, standing up and offering the rocker to Esme. She sat down and I placed the baby in her arms. Carlisle had come and was standing outside the nursery window, Dorianne in his arms. She was pointing to Esme, smiling and laughing and waving to us through the window. I stepped out to speak to Carlisle, and Dorianne launched herself into my arms, chattering about the baby.

“Do they know anything about her yet?” Carlisle asked, watching Esme lovingly through the window.

“Not yet, but one of the nurses told me the oldest boy we brought in said the baby wasn’t their sister, some girl just left the baby and took one of his dad’s ‘bags’ for the guy she was with, and she never came back. The description he gave of her made her sound like a runaway teen,” I said sadly while Dorianne was trying to kiss me to make me better. “The boys and the little girl in surgery are of mixed ethnicity and have similar features, so we’re assuming until we find out otherwise that they’re related.”

The attending pediatrician was coming out, and we inquired about the baby’s condition. He told us she was actually in good shape considering where we found her. She appeared to be full term, but very tiny, weighing just under six pounds, which was indicative of a very young mother, poor neonatal nutrition, or possibly both. She tested negative for drugs in her system, which was a relief. She was stable, and would be ready to be released into foster care in a couple of days.

“Do you have placement lined up for her?” the doctor asked, glancing over his shoulder. Carlisle looked at Esme through the glass and smiled, “We probably do if my wife has anything to say about it.”

I took Dorianne with me so Carlisle could clean up and go in with Esme. I watched as he placed his hand on her shoulder and spoke to her. She nodded happily, smiling and kissing Carlisle.

“Looks like you’re maybe going to have a little sister, Dorianne,” I said as I kissed her chubby cheek and headed towards the nurses’ station. Half way down the hall, I got that familiar feeling I was being watched. I turned to see the stairwell door closing, and chills ran up my spine. The nightmare I had Thanksgiving morning came back to me, causing me to tremble. Maybe it was just my vivid imagination. However, imaginations didn’t lurk in secluded stairwells.

I was standing at the nurses’ station speaking with the head nurse when Dr. Cheney walked around the corner. He spotted me holding Dorianne and grinned as he looked up and down the halls before coming over to me.

“Miss Swan, wonderful to see you today,” he crooned at me with his attempt at a smooth voice. “That youngster looks familiar. Have I treated her before?”

“She’s the youngest of the Crowley children from the hostage case a few months ago,” I offered coolly, hoping to deter any further ideas that I might be interested in a non-professional conversation.

“Well, you look like a natural with her,” he continued. “I’ll bet you would look really cute preggers. I would be willing to help you practice…”

He was cut off in mid sentence by Edward’s painfully firm grasp on his shoulder. “Hello, Ben,” Edward hissed, low and menacing next to his ear, not releasing his grip on Dr. Cheney’s shoulder. “You know, I have to agree with you that Bella is going to look stunning as she carries my children, and if she needs any help ‘practicing’ getting pregnant, I’ll be the one to do it. She is my fiancée, after all.” I grinned at Dr. Cheney and held up my left hand, allowing my ring to catch the lights in the corridor. He started stammering as Edward released him, stepping backwards away from Edward, and me.

“Sorry there, man,” he mumbled. “Uh…congratulations. I better go check on…” was all we heard as he hurried away. Edward turned to me, taking Dorianne from me and pulling me into his side.

“If he approaches you again, let me know. I’ll wipe the floor with him,” Edward growled under his breath.

“My hero,” I giggled, kissing his jaw.

Dorianne threw her little arms around Edward’s neck, her curly blond pigtails bouncing, and exclaimed, “He-wo!” and planted a mushy wet kiss on his cheek as well.

“Back off my man, little sister!” I teased as Edward handed her back to me, laughing. He was obviously dead on his feet from being here all night, and then in surgery all afternoon. “How’s the little girl from this morning?” I asked, wishing I knew a name to call her by.

“She’s stable for now; we just have to watch out for infection. That glass was like razor bullets. Some of it went all the way to the bone. She’s probably going to have some scarring from it in combination with the burns. She’s lucky those sunglasses protected her eyes; else I probably would have had to remove them. The glass would have gone right through her eyelids.” I shuddered at the thought of that, and leaned in to give Edward one more quick kiss before he headed home to rest and clean up before coming back in a few hours.

Carlisle and Esme came out of the NICU and were heading towards the nurses’ station when Dorianne saw them. She started squirming, wanting me to put her down, and went waddling towards them chattering ‘mama’ and ‘dada’ the whole way. Carlisle grabbed her up, and Esme came to me, wrapping her arms around me, “Oh, Bella, we want to take her home. Has there been any word on who was keeping her?”

“I haven’t heard back from Rose or Alice yet, but we suspect she was abandoned by a teen runaway given what the other children have said. Are you sure you’re up to one more?” I asked smiling. Knowing Esme, the concept of ‘too many’ little girls was foreign.

“I would love it!” she exclaimed. “She’s so precious I just want to take her home right now.”

“I’ll call Rose and get the paperwork started,” I hugged her again as they turned to leave. “I don’t know the story behind this baby, but as far as we know at this time, she has no one, and she’ll at least need care until we’ve determined her history. We’re so lucky to have you guys in the program.”

“We’re the lucky ones, dear,” Esme smiled as she took Dorianne, hugging her close. Dorianne patted her face and said, “My mama,” melting Esme’s heart.

With all four children settled into the hospital, I headed back to the office to wrap up for the day. The snow had been falling all day, and had picked up now, blanketing everything in white. I was about to head for the underground tunnel system to go back to the office when I felt a hand on my shoulder pull me backwards and I was certain I heard “No!” whispered near my ear. I spun to see who was there, but no one was anywhere near me. However, the hair on my arms and the back of my neck was standing on end. I immediately turned and headed for the front door instead.

The week passed slowly with Edward being gone most of the time I was home. Fortunately, these weeks only came along every few months, so I took heart in knowing it would be a while before he had to do it again, and tonight was the last night for this week. It was hard for me to fall asleep because I had gotten used to Edward’s soft piano playing at night lulling me to sleep. I heard every noise, creak, and groan of the old house, but tonight, with the cold wind howling outside, they sounded particularly eerie.

I knew I wasn’t going to get any sleep unless I did something to make myself sleepy, so I went down to the kitchen to make myself a huge mug of hot cocoa and grab a couple of cookies. Chocolate and chocolate worked for me any night.

On the way back to bed I stopped to admire the Christmas tree in the bay window in the dim light of the hallway. The headlights from a car turning down the street shone briefly on the bay window, revealing the outline of a figure standing outside the window just far enough back that I couldn’t make out any distinctive features. I screamed, dropping the mug, and it shattered on the hardwood floor, dousing my legs and the hem of my nightshirt in scalding hot cocoa.

When I looked back, the figure was gone. I ran for the phone and dialed 911, reporting a ‘Peeping Tom’. Within minutes, there was a police car in front of my house and two officers looking around the yard for footprints or evidence. A couple of minutes later, Emmett came running up to my front door.

“Bella, are you alright?” he asked in a panic. “Did they try to break in?” Emmett was looking around trying to determine if I was injured or in any further danger.

“How did you know so fast…?” I asked, confused

“Police scanner. We keep one on in the station so we can know what’s going on in the city,” he said. “I was just getting ready to head home when I heard the dispatcher assign your call and came straight over when I heard your address. Are you sure you’re ok?”

“Just a little freaked is all, and scalded.” I had forgotten about my legs until just now, the pain from the burns starting to kick in. Blisters were threatening in several places on both legs and it hurt to stand there.

“Where’s your first aid kit?” Emmett asked. I directed him to the closet in the bathroom. The officers came back in and said that, other than a few smeared out footprints, there was no sign of anyone now. I signed the report they took, and they said they would be patrolling in the area for the rest of the night and would keep an eye on the house. I felt a little better knowing they would be around.

Emmett helped me upstairs and, with his eyes closed, into a clean nightshirt so he could treat my legs. The burns were worse than I thought, extending from my knees to the tops of my feet, and really hurt, especially when he was cleaning off the cocoa.

Emmett suggested I see a doctor in the morning and gave me a couple of pain relief tablets for the pain. “Try to relax and get some sleep, Bella. I’m not going anywhere,” he said, turning off my light as he left. Downstairs I heard Emmett relocking the front door, and then he cleaned up the mess in the hallway. The springs in the old recliner squeaked as he finally sat down and reclined his massive frame into a more comfortable position, ready to watch over me for the duration of the night. I felt like I had put my guardian angels through their paces today.

Alice, Rose, and I had planned to go Christmas shopping, but I was stuck in the house the whole weekend, doctor’s orders, namely Dr. Masen. Edward took care of me, not allowing me up to do anything to keep the blisters from bursting and the pain to a minimum. The only time he left was to go to the hospital for a couple of hours to make his rounds. He didn’t say much, but I could tell he was very worried about the person watching me.

After being so frightened by the stranger in the window, I had nightmares every time I closed my eyes unless Edward was next to me, so his presence back in my bed was resumed, with the promise of behaving until after the wedding. I was sure Edward could behave, but I had doubts about my own self control.

Christmas was upon us so quickly I barely had time to finish shopping. Edward and I were headed out to Carlisle and Esme’s house for a Christmas Eve party, and were laden down with gifts for all six girls and our friends. Edward had gotten Carlisle a special gift; several shares of stock in Proctor and Gamble to help offset the expenses of having so many females in the house. I was sure he would love it, and enjoy the humor in the gift.

Mary Noelle had become the newest member of the household, recovering nicely from her rough start and rescue from the meth lab house. We searched extensively for the baby’s identity, but none was ever discovered. The other children with her were taken in by a relative, thankfully.

“Aunt Bella, come play with us,” Marisol and Abigail demanded as they dragged me through the front door. They were setting up the Hot Wheels racetrack set Rose and Emmett had given Marisol for her birthday last month. Given both their passion for cars, that gift didn’t surprise me a bit, and all the girls loved it when Emmett played with them and made car noises, especially the police cruiser.

Edward sat the packages down and grabbed Dorianne as she leapt into his arms from the sofa. “He-wo,” she exclaimed, grinning at him with a crinkled nose and patting the sides of his face. Stephenie and Madelyn were busy with Mary, passing her back and forth between them like a live doll.

“I have to wait my turn with her,” Esme laughed. “If this child’s feet ever hit the floor, it’ll be a miracle.” She handed a bottle to Rose, and Madelyn placed the baby in Rose’s arms while she sat cradled in Emmett’s lap in the huge recliner. Esme beamed as she watched the three of them rocking together gently, no doubt imagining her grandchildren. She and Rose had started planning their wedding since they set their date for late summer and were anticipating an elaborate wedding and reception.

Jasper and Alice came in shortly behind us carrying a huge load of gifts as well. I almost fell over laughing when I saw Alice. She was dressed in the cutest Christmas elf costume, ready to play Santa’s helper.

It had been snowing all day, and the girls begged to go outside for a little while and play. We helped Esme bundle them all up and went outside with them, all of us working on building a huge snowman. Edward and Emmett were champion snow packers, and had the snowman base stacked in no time. As I watched them, I started laughing hysterically, everyone looking at me like I was insane.

“I hope you aren’t making fun of our snowman building skills, love. Emmett and I happen to be the champions here. We have stories that would make even Santa himself proud, or cringe, depending on the year.” Edward was so cute when he boasted. However, I was pretty sure I had him beat on this one.

“I’m sure you have great stories, guys, but how about years when there wasn’t enough snow to build a snowman. What did you do then,” I asked with a mischievous gleam in my eyes.

“Well, we obviously didn’t build one,” Emmett grumbled. “No snow, no man.”

“That’s too bad, guys. We never had that problem. However, the first time we built one of our special ‘snowless snowmen’, he had a last name, not just Frosty. Poppa called him ‘Frosty Badass’. He got in trouble with Grammy for the name, but there was really nothing else that fit,” I laughed again, trying to control my giggles to tell the story.

“I was nine and it was a really warm winter with hardly any snow. I was so upset that we wouldn’t be able to build our Christmas snowman. Poppa decided to surprise me by making a snowman out of that expanding foam you use to insulate around pipes. What he didn’t take into account was how much the foam would expand overnight.” By this time I was having a hard time controlling myself.

“He went out to the shed where he sprayed the mounds of foam to harden overnight and brought the two smallest balls out into the yard. However, the third one expanded so huge he couldn’t get it through the door.” Everyone was looking at me now, trying not to laugh, so I finished telling the tale of Frosty Badass.

“After trying everything, Poppa finally took his chainsaw and cut the sides off the huge ball, and then he brought it out into the yard and used metal landscaping spikes and metal barrel bands to put it all back together, and we poked three rows of long nails in his head to give him a Mohawk hairstyle. He was the toughest looking snowman you could imagine. Poppa went to a thrift store and got an old ratty fake leather jacket and a pair of boots, a bandana, a pair of cheap sunglasses, and a chain dog lead to finish off his costume.

“By the time we finished with him, he looked like a rowdy biker snow dude. Grammy even got into the act using upholstery thumbtacks for his piercings. He was so popular, the manager of Spikes, a biker bar in the downtown area, begged Poppa to sell him the silly thing. From what I’ve heard, they still display it in the corner there during the holidays.”

By now, Edward and Emmett were doubled over. “We concede and bow to the greatness that is Swan ingenuity and creativity,” Emmett howled. “Bella, I’m glad we’re keeping you around. You definitely keep us laughing!”

After watching the girls grow more and more restless, Carlisle and Esme decided it was time to go inside and warm up, then pass out gifts. Stephenie and Madelyn opened their gifts slowly, so grateful to be having Christmas at all. Marisol and Abigail were very enthusiastic, sending paper flying in every direction as they plowed through their piles. As we all finished exchanging and opening gifts, Carlisle called us all to attention.

“I have one last gift for the girls, if they’ll have it,” he said, holding up a large tan envelope. “Inside here are adoption papers. If you girls are willing, Esme and I, no, your mother and I, would like to make you our own, legally and permanently.”

Madelyn, Stephenie, and Abigail looked at each other, and then flung themselves into Carlisle and Esme’s laps, leaving trails of tears on their shirts, Marisol and Dorianne climbed in to join the group hug. Jasper pulled out his camera and had Rose and Emmett come and stand behind Esme and Carlisle, holding Mary Noelle, while the other girls arranged themselves on the floor and in their laps for a family picture. I watched, tears streaming down my face, as I witnessed my work come full circle.

This was what it was all about. True, loving family.

Edward

I didn’t used to hate the night shift as much as I did now, but back then I didn’t have Bella’s warm arms to look forward to at night, so it didn’t matter so much. I had to confess, I was spoiled now. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I was glad this painfully long week was almost over. It had been a fairly quiet evening, with only a few minor injuries and a couple of flu cases coming through the ER, so around midnight I took my break and headed for the Sanctuary to get in some time at the piano and finish working on Bella’s Christmas gift. I had been playing for about half an hour when I heard the door at the back of the Sanctuary open and close quietly.

“Good morning, Edward,” Father Mallory said brightly from the front pew as I finished the song I was playing. “That was beautiful. Did you compose it?”

“I did. It’s a Christmas gift for my fiancé,” I smiled back at him. “She’s the inspiration behind the lyrics.”

“Ah, so the hospital grapevine is accurate. What joyous news! My sincerest congratulations. I understand she’s quite an extraordinary young woman from what everyone is saying about her,” Father Mallory said as he came to stand next to the piano. “So, when’s the big day?”

“Valentine’s Day. We’ve decided not to do a big production or draw out the engagement. Just something small at home with friends and family.” I couldn’t help the huge smile on my face as I talked about our upcoming wedding. “Bella is not the kind of woman that goes in for the big and elaborate. I would be happy wearing flour sacks and standing in a muddy field as long as I still got to give her my last name,” I grinned. Father Mallory laughed with me, patting me on the shoulder.

“Sounds like true love, my son. If you haven’t procured someone to officiate the ceremony yet, I would be honored to do it as my gift to the two of you. You’ve given me more than you’ll ever know and I would relish the opportunity to repay the favor, Edward.”

We discussed the particulars, and I agreed to speak with Bella. However, I had no doubt she would be as happy with Father Mallory as I was.

I was making my way back to the ER and stopped to get coffee when Dr. Stanley joined me in the empty break room. “Well, Dr. Masen, you’re looking mighty acquiescent these days. Are the rumors true then? Have you decided to take pity on Ugly Swan and save her from a life of lonely dullness? That’s very chivalrous of you, Edward. You know, marriage is all fine and good, but a man does need some excitement, and the little woman would never have to be any the wiser. Let me know when you get bored and are ready for someone more interesting,” she purred suggestively as she ran her hand down my arm before walking out of the break room. I was so angry I couldn’t move or speak, lest I unleash on her something I didn’t think I could control at the moment. That was the last time. If she ever approached me again, I would file charges. I suddenly felt the need for a shower.

I finished my shift and made it home in the early hours of the morning to find Emmett’s SUV parked in front of the house. I immediately wondered what he did to make Rose mad enough that he had to hide from her at our place. When I opened the apartment door, Emmett was suddenly in the doorway from the kitchen, his hand on his revolver.

“What the hell, Emmett?!” I asked in an alarmed voice. Although he had been relaxed, Emmett was fully alert now.

“Sorry, man, there was a little drama here last night, and I wasn’t expecting you to come in the back door,” he said. Emmett could tell by the look on my face I was about to go into a full panic. “Calm down, Edward, Bella’s fine. Nothing happened, well not much…”

Emmett didn’t get to finish his sentence, as I was half way up the stairs before he could say anything else. Bella was sleeping fitfully when I entered her room. Her legs were on top of the covers, and the first thing I saw were the bandages covering them. My heart sank into my stomach as I was fighting my emotions to stay calm and not startle her awake. However, when I touched her arm, she sat up screaming.

“Shh, Bella, it’s me, you’re okay and nothing’s going to harm you now.” I pulled her into my lap and wrapped my arms around her, and she clung to me, her chest heaving with fear. “It was just a dream, love. You’re safe now.” I tried to soothe her, but I needed to feel her close to me as much as she needed me. Once she calmed down enough to speak, she told me about last night, and why her legs were bandaged.

Emmett came in with a plate of toast and a glass of juice, and two more pain relief tablets. While she ate, I check her legs. They were blistered and sore, so after she finished, I insisted she lay back down and try to rest. Her night had been horrible, so she was exhausted. She fell back to sleep almost immediately. I kissed her gently and went to find Emmett downstairs getting ready to head home.

“Thanks for taking care of her and for staying here last night, Emmett. Why didn’t’ you call me, though?” I wasn’t angry, just worried.

“I didn’t call you because there was nothing you could do at the time. Besides, it just happened a couple of hours ago and I knew you’d be home soon, so I stayed and waited for you,” Emmett shrugged. “Anyway, we’ve got patrols in the neighborhood, and if anyone as much as steps foot on the property, we’ll know.”

“Thanks again, brother. You don’t know how much I appreciate you,” I smiled and hugged Emmett as he was leaving. He reached up and ruffled my already messy hair.

“Yeah, I do. I always have, and it’s mutual. Later, man.”

The weeks leading up to Christmas were crazy. I had a heavy load of patients at the hospital due to people letting their kids do crazy things in the snow and ice, but I was also trying to keep an eye on Bella whenever she was in the building. Fortunately, Dr. Cheney got the message, and spread the word to the other doctors about Bella and I being engaged. I wasn’t looking forward to having to cause bodily injury to one of my colleagues, but it was a definite possibility if they hadn’t backed off and left Bella alone. I had enough to worry about without that, too. Dr. Stanley also backed off, and I saw her on several occasions with a very nice looking guy in the break room and sometimes waiting for her at the end of her shift. Her whole demeanor changed almost overnight, and it was refreshing. She didn’t know how close she came to standing before the review board.

The morning of Christmas Eve, Bella left to do some last minute Christmas shopping with Alice and Rose before we joined the Cullen’s for a party that night, so I was able to get her gifts wrapped and practice her song through a few times on our piano before tomorrow. Bella’s parents were coming tomorrow morning to spend a week with us for the holidays, and I was looking forward to having them back. On their last visit at Thanksgiving, Charlie and I spent some time together talking about past Christmases and he let me in on the family secret to the Santa dust. It wasn’t Renee that did it, but him. To this day, Bella still didn’t know that, and he asked that I keep it that way. The sparkle in his eyes when he talked about his baby girl had me looking forward to having one of my own to spoil.

I just knew if she had big brown eyes like her beautiful mother, I would be completely wrapped.

Chapter: 11

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 11 – Hand-me-downs

Bella

Christmas morning in the Swan household usually consisted of Renee trying to pretend Santa had been there and left a huge mess of Santa’s Magic Dust everywhere while delivering our gifts. Superfine gold glitter would be sprinkled everywhere Santa had been, from the fireplace, past the cookie plate, and all over the tree and gifts. I actually believed it until I was almost eleven because of the way she fussed and ranted about the mess. Then one day I found the tube of gold glitter, and her ruse was blown. It never stopped her from continuing to do it, however. Some traditions just died hard. I was looking forward to using it on our kids some day.

I was so tired after the party at the Cullen’s that I fell asleep in the car. I vaguely remember Edward lifting me out of the car and bringing me into the house. And I certainly didn’t remember how I got down to nothing but my panties. I was too dead to the world to even know if Edward liked the surprise I arranged to be ‘delivered’ while we were at the party.

I really wasn’t awake yet, as it was only six o’clock, and I was trying to pull the pillow up closer to me, reaching down to get a better hold, when I realized I wasn’t manipulating my pillow at all. My head shot up to see Edward grinning back at me, obviously enjoying being groped by me while I slept. I flushed bright red and sat up, not yet realizing my lack of nightshirt, giving Edward a fabulous full view of my exposed upper body.

“Merry Christmas to me!” Edward snickered as I felt the draft in the room work its magic in Edward’s favorite way, making him groan at the signs of my obvious chill. I wasn’t sure if he was more pleased or frustrated. “You’re killing me, Bella.”

It had been over a month since we had done anything more than briefly kiss each other, and we were both starting to feel the effects, especially since we had started sleeping together again to quiet my nightmares. I couldn’t stand not feeling him near me any longer, so I moved over onto his chest and started kissing him in earnest.

“Merry Christmas to us both,” I giggled as we slipped into each other’s arms. “I missed you.” Edward looked at me with so much love in his eyes as I melted onto his chest, kissing him deeply. We lay that way for another hour, enjoying each other for a while before deciding to get up.

“By the way, darling, how did my wardrobe end up over there?” he asked, grinning and pointing to the antique cabinet he had bought for his clothes to clear the closet for easier passage. “Last I recall it was downstairs in my apartment.”

“Well, the closet in here is kind of full, and you needed some place for your clothes, didn’t you?” I asked innocently. “You’ll also find the rest of your things folded into Poppa’s chest over there,” I pointed to the large antique chest of drawers that had been Poppa’s since he and Grammy were first married. He pulled me into a tender embrace, and I could tell he was happy. “I hoped you’d like my surprise. Merry Christmas, Edward. I love you, more than you’ll ever know.”

Edward was in the shower when I decided to have some fun. He was busy rinsing his hair with his eyes closed, so he didn’t see me when I slipped into the other end of the bathtub around the curtain. When he opened his eyes, he was startled, but grinned widely as he looked me up and down. I was doing the same as I looked at him, certainly enjoying the view as much as he was.

“I’ll wash yours if you’ll wash mine,” I purred at him. He started to reach for me and I turned my back, twisting my hair up and handed him my washcloth. “My back first,” I giggled, “And then I’ll wash your back.” He laughed and grabbed the shower gel and began washing me. I leaned back against him and allowed him to wrap his arms around me and wash my front as well.

“Just so you know, I’d be more than happy to do this any time,” he mumbled against my neck.

“I sure hope so, because you’re stuck with me, mister, so get used to it,” I grinned up at him and wrapped my arms around him, happy I was able to affect him so much. He held me there against his chest with his arms wrapped around me until the hot water started to fade, so we decided we’d better get out before we got an unnecessary cold shower.

Renee and Charlie were due to arrive around nine o’clock to share Christmas with us, so we had to hurry to get dressed. I was just finishing my hair when I heard the doorbell. Edward answered it, and I heard my mom’s voice ringing through the living room and up the stairs as they came in. “Merry Christmas, Edward, dear, you look absolutely radiant. Engagement must be good for you!” she said warmly, having no clue how ‘engaged’ we had just been. You’re so funny and you don’t even know it, mom!

I heard Renee coming up the stairs after Edward and Charlie went back out to bring in the rest of their luggage and gifts. “Good morning, Bella. Merry Christmas,” Renee said as she walked into my bedroom. I was making the bed when I turned around to see her reaching for the wardrobe. “This is beautiful. Is it new?” she asked as she grabbed the handle and opened the door.

There are just some looks parents get on their faces you wished you never had to see, but at the same time wished you had a camera rolling to capture. This was one of those times. After composing herself, Renee simply closed the wardrobe and turned to me, smiling. “I need a big cup of coffee, how about you?”

“Sounds like a good idea, mom.” I smiled back at her and headed down to the kitchen. I was sure there would be a discussion later, but for now, I really just wanted to enjoy the day.

Charlie and Edward brought the rest of their things in, and Charlie was loaded down with bags, heading for the stairs to the guest room, when I stopped him. “Dad, we’ve made the apartment into our best guest room, so why don’t you and mom stay in there where you’ll have more room?” I winked at Edward, and he grinned. “Here, Charlie, let me help you with those.” Edward grabbed two of the suitcases and led Charlie and Renee through the open closet door into the apartment, both of them looking over their shoulders at me.

Edward and I started breakfast while Charlie and Renee settled in. Charlie came out and sat down at the table, a faraway look in his eyes as he watched us working.

“Bella, honey, you look so much like your Grammy when she was younger. Love suits you, you know,” he smiled wistfully, and I noticed he was holding a small old leather bound book. “I found this the other day in some of Grammys old papers. I though you should have it. There’s an envelope in the back addressed to you.”

He handed me the book, and I sat down across from him for a minute to look at it. As I turned to the back of the book, I noticed a small envelope pressed into the back binding. Inside it was a letter and a picture of me and another little boy, neither of us more than six years old, and I was holding a bouquet of pink roses and grinning, both of us with our front teeth missing. I removed the letter and read the words written to me so many years ago.

My precious Bella,

The day this picture was taken, you and Laurent Dubois, the little boy next door, decided you were going to get married. You were so sure he was the one, and he followed you everywhere trying to kiss you! I really began to doubt your love for him, though, after you punched him in the stomach for stealing a lick off your ice cream later that day after your ‘wedding’. The roses you are holding in the picture are from a rose bush Poppa planted for you when Renee told us you were on your way into the world, and we just knew you would be a girl.

My love, whether you do grow up to marry Laurent Dubois, or go on to find someone just as handsome as he was without his front teeth, please know that Poppa and I will always be watching over you. You’re so much like your father and your Poppa; strong, stubborn to a fault, and so very bright. And you have a heart like no child I have ever seen before. The man who is lucky enough to win your hand is in for a lifetime of love and happiness. You’re father was our pride and joy, but you were our life, and you brought life to us in ways we never imagined possible.

Upon your engagement to this wonderful man, your father will be giving you something special from Poppa and me for your wedding, and I promise you that Poppa and I will be there, even if we’re not still here. I know God is good and would allow us to come. Remember Him, Bella, He’s watching over you, too.

Always, my little love,

Grammy

Charlie had gone back into the apartment and was standing beside me with a box in one hand, handkerchief in the other pressed to his nose. “Allergies,” he muttered as he blew his nose and wiped his eyes.

“Yeah, dad, I know what you mean,” I grinned at him as I was wiping the tears from my face. He sat the beautiful carved box in front of me and motioned for me to open it, mostly because he was too choked up to speak. I lifted the hinged lid to find the most spectacular strand of real, lustrous pearls, a matching bracelet, and a pair of the most beautiful earrings I had ever seen.

When Charlie could finally speak, he said, “The day after that picture was taken, your Grammy and Poppa went and bought these for you for your real wedding. I think they knew they wouldn’t be here in person to be with you on your wedding day, so they wanted you to have something from them to let you know they were with you and loved you so much, Bella.”

Charlie was barely able to finish his sentence before emotions took him over and tears streamed down his face. Edward came over and pulled Charlie up into his arms. “Thank you so much, Charlie, I promise to spend the rest of my life making your daughter as happy as she has made me.”

I wrapped my arms around my two favorite men, and Renee came in and joined the group hug. “Ok, I’m starving. Let’s eat!” Charlie laughingly boomed, embarrassed by all the emotions he normally kept in better check.

We finished breakfast and headed with our coffee into the living room to exchange gifts. When I walked into the room, I couldn’t help but burst out laughing. From the fireplace, to the tree, all over the gifts and across the coffee table was a smattering of fine gold dust. I looked at Renee, and she just turned her head, humming to herself. Like I said, some traditions just never died.

Charlie was excited with the new fishing rod, tackle box and lure assortment I gave him, and Edward made a new best friend with a pair of SuperSonics tickets for a basketball game night together. Renee went crazy over the designer handbag and shoes Alice had helped me pick out for her. However, her jaw dropped when she opened Edward’s gift. It was an exquisite antique platinum broach inlaid with dozens of diamonds, sapphires, and pearls, and there was a pair of matching earrings with it.

“Oh, Edward, this is beyond…” she tried to protest, but Edward wrapped his arm around her shoulder, placing a sweet kiss on her cheek.

“Renee, you’re going to be my mom now, too. These belonged to my mother and were amongst her most treasured possessions. I want you to have them and wear them often. She would have liked that.”

She wrapped Edward into a huge hug, and then proceeded to pin the broach to her red blouse and clip the earrings on her ears, showing us how stunning the pieces really were. Edward saved his gift to me for last, handing me a large, slightly heavy box. I pulled the lid off to reveal a jewelry box made of rosewood and alabaster, and inlaid with mother of pearl and gold in the pattern of a pair of mermaids on the doors. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

“Edward, really, you didn’t…” I protested, but Edward gently placed his fingers over my lips.

“Bella, she would have wanted you to have this, too,” he smiled, motioning for me to open it. “I gave Renee only one set, the rest is for you.”

I opened Elizabeth Masen’s jewelry box, overwhelmed by the extraordinary, breathtaking array of jewelry she had enjoyed in her lifetime. My eyes were immediately drawn to a beautiful diamond band that looked like it went with the engagement ring on my finger. I picked it up to get a better look, but Edward reached out his hand and gently took it from me, slipping it on my finger next to the engagement ring to show everyone, but then slipped it back off again. “You’ll have to wait about seven more weeks to get this one back,” he grinned at me and slipped it into his pocket, kissing me on the nose.

“Oh, my goodness, I almost forgot,” Renee squealed as she headed out to the apartment and came back carrying an arm full of old photo albums. “Bella, I’m giving these to you. You’re now keeper of the family albums.”

We spent the rest of the morning pouring through the albums, sharing memories of our Christmases past, my early accomplishments and mishaps, and warning Edward of the crazy family he would be joining. He, in turn, brought out a stack of albums of his own he had inherited from his parents, and it was funny to see how much our lives had been alike in so many ways. As I went to put away the albums Renee gave me, he added his to the stack and lifted them all, putting them away together in the same cabinet in the family room. Edward took me by the hand and led me into the parlor where he sat down at his piano and pulled me beside him on the bench. Renee and Charlie came in as well, sitting on the settee to hear Edward play.

”I want to give you one more gift, if I may, Bella. I’ve been working on this since the day I saw you in the hospital that first time, and I hope you like it,” Edward said. “It’s called ‘I Never Knew.’”

What I heard next took my breath away. I had heard Edward play the piano and knew he was unbelievably talented, but I never knew he could sing and write so beautifully.

As I lay here tonight I realize

How foolish and blind I’ve become

I was sure I had searched the world over

And learned all there was about love

But the longer I’m ‘round you I’m finding

I have so very far to go

Since I’ve found you I’m finding out

There’s so much that I’ve yet to know, like

I never knew how long a day was

Til I spent one without you

I never dreamed of more than wishing

That my dreams just might come true

I never knew what I was missing

I never knew what life was worth

I never knew til I was kissing

An angel’s lips right here on earth

I thought I knew most everything

Nothing more to be achieved

Love was the only thing

I never knew

Til you loved me

The full moon in the night sky

Don’t shine as brightly as your eyes

And though the sun lights up my days

You’ll be the star in all my nights

I never knew how long a day was

Til I spent one without you

I never dreamed of more than wishing

That my dreams just might come true

I never knew what I was missing

I never knew what life was worth

I never knew til I was kissing

An angel’s lips right here on earth

Yes, I thought I knew most everything

Nothing more to be achieved

Love was the only thing

I never knew

Til you loved me

I sat speechless as the song ended, overwhelmed with love that he would do such a beautiful thing for me. I wrapped my arms around him tightly and Renee and Charlie both were applauding enthusiastically. Renee came up behind Edward and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him on the cheek, whispering, “Make sure you teach that to our grandchildren.”

Renee spent the afternoon with Edward getting an impromptu piano lesson while the three of them discussed baby names and how often they would be brought to Forks for the weekend to go fishing with grandpa. It was hysterical to listen to them, but most of all, it was comforting. I was so happy they loved him almost as much as I did.

We were sitting around watching old movies later that evening, Edward and I cuddled up together, when he whispered, “So, are you glad you chose me over little Laurent Dubois?” he teased. “He was a pretty fetching young fellow without those teeth.”

“I can’t remember what I ever saw in him,” I giggled. “He was really kind of a weird kid, now that I think back on it. As we got older, I used to catch him watching me from his bedroom window all the time. He gave me the creeps when we were teens, always trying to get me to come over and hang out in his room. Grammy and Poppa practically forbade me to go anywhere near him after we were in high school. Grammy always said ‘Something’s not right about that boy.’” I rolled my eyes, remembering how protective they were. “He was really harmless, just lonely, I think.”

I looked up to see a serious, thoughtful expression on Edward’s face, as if he were thinking about something important. “Does his family still live next door?” Edward asked, half smiling but still looking deep in thought.

“No, they moved away right after graduation, and I haven’t seen him since,” I replied. “Why, are you afraid you may have some competition from my first husband?” I teased.

“After this morning, love, I would have to say it’s him I feel sorry for. He was a fool to let you get away so easily,” Edward whispered to me. “He has no idea the treasure he gave up. I’m grateful for his lack of foresight.”

Renee was asleep on the sofa and Charlie had fallen asleep in the recliner, so Edward and I covered them up and quietly slipped upstairs. Edward stopped at the foot of the stairs and wrapped his arms around me.

“Bella, you’re my world now, and I wouldn’t be able to live if anything ever happened to you. Please, promise me you’ll do your very best to stay safe. For me,” Edward whispered into my hair. I nodded, and his arms tightened around me protectively. “I’ll never let anything happen to you if I can possibly help it.” His words should have comforted me; however, I could feel in his touch he sensed it, too.

Something lay in wait for me, and I was not so sure even Edward could stop it.

Chapter: 12

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 12 – Visitors

Bella

Renee and I headed out to catch a few of the after Christmas sales while Edward and Charlie set about shoveling the sidewalks. The promise of masses of screaming basketball fans had Charlie pumped and he was anxious to burn off a little of his energy, even though Edward tried vigorously to talk him out of it. Charlie was like me; when he decided he was going to do something, there was no deterring him.

Shopping with Renee was almost as much of an exercise in patience as shopping with Alice, except Renee was enamored by the most peculiar items, and for reasons I could only speculate. We ended up with a weed popper, two sets of scented tiki torches, and a huge bulgy, droopy-eyed garden toad statue Renee insisted was a perfect caricature of the mean old lady that lived next door who always scowled at her when she trimmed the hedges and some of the debris fell on her side of the picket fence. I couldn’t help but howl with laughter as Renee started making faces and imitating obnoxious frog noises and behaviors in the middle of Wal-Mart, earning incredulous stares from other nearby shoppers. Only my mom…

We were heading to our next store to find heaven only knows what when my cell phone rang. It was Edward. “Hello, handsome,” I said, smiling as Renee winked at me. I wasn’t smiling for long.

“Bella, it’s your dad. He’s had a heart attack.” Edward was frantic on the other end of the phone. I could hear the fear in his voice as the paramedics in the background worked on Charlie, “Meet us at Valley Medical Center, we’re leaving now.”

I dropped the phone and spun around in the parking lot like a stunt driver, heading for the freeway. Renee’s eyes were wide, and her voice became tiny as she whispered, “It’s Charlie.”

We were there in a matter of minutes thanks to my driving. I never was a fast driver, but right now, I didn’t care. The paramedics had already taken Charlie back, and Edward met us at the entrance. “How bad is it?” Renee asked calmly, but I could tell she was about to lose it. Edward motioned us to a row of chairs and explained what happened. He had tried to get Charlie to sit down, but he was just so happy, he was chattering away while he shoveled. Then he suddenly stopped and went to sit on the porch, where he threw up, and then passed out.

Renee just sat there silent, tears streaming down her face. When she finally spoke, she had barely regained her composure and had a look of uncertainty on her face.

“He won’t die. He can’t die. How would I manage without him if he dies, Bella?” She was trembling now, and a new wave of tears started as the realization that the love of her life could be taken from her hit hard. Edward went to check on Charlie while Renee and I waited, holding on to each other for dear life, and prayed. Grammy promised God was good and he listened, so I was doing everything in my power to get him to hear me now.

I looked at Renee closely, really closely, for the first time in a long time. I never noticed the wrinkles, deep set and tired, around her eyes, and how thin and delicate her skin had become. Her hair, shiny and soft, was streaked with gray I never realized she had. To me, she was always the perky, happy mom who never slowed down and was eternally young and vibrant. The woman before me was frail, slightly helpless, and needed Charlie more than life itself. How would she possibly survive without him? I pulled her into my arms like so many of the children I had protected doing my job, and held her, determined to make sure she was never alone.

Edward came out a while later and sat down silently next to me. His shoulders looked heavy, and he had been crying. I lay my hand on his arm, and he looked up at me sadly, silently.

“Edward…?”

“He’s still alive, but barely. The next twenty four hours will be critical. He had a massive heart attack, Bella. The doctors are still guarded about his condition, but he’s a fighter. God, the only thing that saved him was me quickly doing CPR on him and the paramedics getting there so fast. I’ll never curse my cell phone again…”

Edward wrapped Renee in his shaking arms and held her while she sobbed. It was going to be a long night for all of us, so I took out my phone and called Alice and Rose to let them know what was going on. They were both with Jasper and Emmett, and all four of them arrived at the hospital within a half hour, bringing food and coffee for everyone. Rose and Alice surrounded me with hugs, offering words of comfort and prayer. Edward encouraged Renee to eat something, promising her that her strength would help Charlie if he could see her looking well. He also insisted I eat something to keep my strength up for Renee.

The night seemed to stretch on endlessly, and at some point I must have fallen asleep. I found myself sitting on the beach in the sunshine, gazing out over the water of the bay where Poppa and I used to go and collect sea glass and pretty rocks when I was small on clear summer days. I looked over to find him sitting next to me, a peaceful smile on his face while he joined me in my gazing.

“He’s going to be fine, you know,” Poppa said. “A little weak for a bit, but he’s not due here for quite a while yet. He still has to give you away, plus there’s a curly haired set of grandkids that need to learn how to properly bait a hook.”

I grinned at him, “A set?” I asked.

“Twins, to start. Boy and a girl. The boy looks just like you, but the girl has Edward’s mother’s pretty face and his eyes. And, of course, they’ll all have his crazy colored wild hair. Don’t tell Grammy, but Edward’s mom, she’s quite the looker!” he grinned and winked at me. I looked back out over the water as the idea sank in, making me smile. Twins. I was going to have twins. Then his words ‘to start’ sank in. I turned to asked more question, but Poppa had gotten up and was walking away. He turned to me and waved, blowing me a kiss. “I love you, kiddo, and remember, stay out of those stairwells.”

A shiver ran up my spine at his last words. Someone was calling me and I turned towards the sound of their voice for a second, and then turned back to find Poppa, but he was gone. They called my name again, and I awoke to the sound of Edward’s voice whispering gently next to my ear.

“Bella, wake up. Bella?” Edward was stroking my hair and kissing my cheek, waking me from my dream, but I was still groggy and looking for Poppa.

“Edward? Where’s Poppa?” I asked, still absorbed in my dream. Edward smiled at me and shook his head.

“Bella, we’re still at the hospital. I have news on Charlie.” His smile widened as I opened my eyes, finally starting to become more alert.

“Charlie’s going to be fine,” I told him. “Poppa said so.” Edward looked at me like he wasn’t sure if he had woke me up all the way. I looked around and found I was alone. “Where is everyone?”

“They all went home to shower and change and check in with their jobs, but they’ll be back in a little while. Bella, Charlie’s asking for you. Renee’s back with him now, but he wants to see you.”

Edward led me through the automatic doors back into the Cardiac ICU. Charlie was in a small room with glass panels that overlooked the central nurse’s station. Renee stepped out and stood by Edward to allow me in. Charlie was awake and was hooked up to a myriad of tubes, wires, and machines. He smiled weakly as I approached, barely lifting his hand to take mine. “Hey, kiddo. Looks like I’m a member of the bed brigade around here for a while.”

“Shoveling snow is now officially off your ‘stupid things for old guys to do’ list,” I smiled at him through my tears. He barely nodded in agreement.

“They say I need surgery, blocked arteries,” he whispered dryly, “Sounds like fun.”

“Don’t worry, dad. You’ll be fine. Poppa told me you would.” He looked up at me and his smile widened.

“Yeah, I know. Grammy paid me a visit during the night, too. She said Poppa was with you. Seems little Charlie’s gonna give me a run for my money in the biggest fish contest,” he said with a twinkle in his eyes. “I can’t wait to see it.”

Charlie and I looked at each other in silence for a long moment, sharing the knowledge that we were loved by more than just those we could see here and now, and we knew that love would carry both of us through anything, here or hereafter. The nurse came in to remind us visiting hours would resume this evening, so I kissed Charlie’s forehead and promised I would be back later. Charlie called to me as I was leaving.

“Bella,” he motioned me to him, “Grammy said to tell you to stay out of the stairwells, whatever that means. She said you would understand.” Poppa had said that as well, so I was sure it was significant. I would avoid stairwells everywhere at all cost if it was so important that they both mentioned it.

Charlie’s surgery was scheduled for tomorrow morning to bypass the blocked arteries in his chest. Renee was a nervous wreck, but I had it on good authority that Charlie would be fine, so I was able to relax and lose myself in thoughts of motherhood. Poppa said I was due to have twins, to start. The idea scared me a bit, and I wanted to have some time with Edward as a couple before we became a family, but the idea of little ones crawling around made me smile, especially the idea of them having green eyes and curly auburn hair.

The surgery went well, and Charlie spent the next few days in the ICU before being moved to a private room. The doctors were astounded at how quickly he was recovering. I knew every time he looked at me, however, that it wasn’t the medicine that was healing him so fast. It was the idea of a new set of fishing buddies.

New Years eve, we pulled together a small celebration for Charlie in his hospital room. I hadn’t planned on ringing in the New Year this way, but I was happy to have a reason to celebrate. Charlie was doing well enough to go home in a few days, and he was ready to be out of the hospital. The nurses loved him, but were getting tired of being asked if they knew anything about the best fishing spots around the area.

After a long discussion, and after watching Renee flit about in a constant state of nerves, Edward and I decided to ask her and Charlie to stay with us for a while. I wasn’t sure if they were ready to give up their home permanently, but that offer would be there if and when they needed it. The prospect of not having to take care of Charlie by herself, and having Edward close by, calmed Renee down considerably, and she actually started smiling again.

Charlie was finally in a wheelchair, ready to leave. He wanted to walk out on his own power, but hospital policy had him planted firmly in the wheelchair, grumbling about not being crippled, just maimed a little. Renee was receiving discharge instructions from Charlie’s cardiologist and I was listening as well, until I got that tingle that stood the hairs up on the back of my neck. I spun around quickly to see the door to the stairwell closing. I had had enough. I went charging towards the stairwell door when the sound of Poppa’s voice in my head hit me in the face, stopping me in my tracks. I stood there, fighting the urge to chase down the nut job that was driving me crazy and lay into them, but I turned around and went back to a very confused Renee and Charlie.

“What was that all about?” Renee asked after the doctor left. “You looked absolutely furious, Bella.” She was looking at me now, and I tried to calm myself so as not to alarm Charlie and put him under any added stress.

“Oh, it was nothing. I thought I saw a couple of unsupervised kids running in the hall, that’s all.” That seemed to satisfy her and so we left, but I was looking back over my shoulder, annoyed and unnerved. They would have to come out of that stairwell sometime and hopefully not when I was alone.

With Charlie out of the woods, our thoughts turned towards Valentine’s Day, my wedding day. Thankfully, there seemed to be a bit of a lull in the Department as we entered the post-holiday stretch, allowing for more normal work hours and time to work on wedding preparations. Things were still somewhat busy for Edward due to weather related accidents, but with Renee and Charlie in the house, it wasn’t as lonely, or as creepy.

Alice was a godsend when it came to organizing and coordinating wedding plans. I was just thankful there wasn’t a lot to organize and coordinate for our simple wedding. There would be less than forty people in attendance. Alice managed to find a company specializing in home events that would come in and removed everything in the family room and store it in a big truck until after the reception, replacing it with rows of white folding chairs and all the arches and candelabras she ordered. They would come in after the ceremony again and transform it into a reception area with tables. It was a wonderful concept!

After the guys spent a Saturday painting the family room walls a pale shade of melon green, Rose and Renee spent hours draping fine lace fabric and small ivy garlands between bouquets of pink antique roses attached to sculpted antiqued wall candle sconces around the freshly painted room. When everything was finished, it looked like a quaint little wedding chapel in an old fashioned Victorian church. Sebastian and Felicity seemed to approve of the arrangement and spent the better part of the day before the wedding weaving in and out between the chairs and taking turns laying in them to find the ones they liked best.

Esme and Carlisle were standing in as parents of the groom, and Esme cried when Edward asked her. Alice insisted I needed a flower girl and a ring bearer, so Dorianne and Marisol were recruited. Stephenie and Madelyn made my wedding cake with help from Esme and Renee. Esme had been working with them, teaching them how to decorate cakes, and it was actually quite beautiful, with a cascade of pink roses and baby’s breath curving down the side of the tiers.

Edward hired the hospital chaplain to officiate since he and Edward had become good friends during all the times he spent in the chapel at the piano. Edward also played and recorded all the music for the wedding.

The day before the wedding, Alice and Rose were standing in my bedroom, getting ready for Renee to check the final fit of their dresses. I had decided I needed two maids of honor, and Edward also declared the need for a second best man, recruiting Jasper into the wedding party as well as Emmett. They were being fitted for matching suits, but Edward wouldn’t let me see them, wanting it to be a surprise.

“Honestly, Bella, did women actually wear these things?” Rose complained as Alice laced the corset that had Rose’s breathing somewhat labored. “No wonder they fainted all the time back then. Lack of blood circulation this bad would wipe out anyone!”

“Quit complaining!” Alice griped at her. “You know you look hot in this thing, and I’ll bet Emmett would be more than happy to take it off of you after the reception tomorrow.” That thought put a smile on Rose’s face as she turned to admire herself in the mirror. Her figure was already perfect, but the corset still did amazing things to her. The vintage dresses we had found for them were a beautiful compliment to the vintage Victorian gown that now hung in my closet, carefully cleaned and conditioned by a friend of Esme’s who restored and preserved vintage clothing and dolls.

“Anyway, where are the guys right now?” Alice asked. “I haven’t talked to Jasper much at all today.”

“I suspect they’re trying to cook up some kind of bachelor party,” I groaned under my breath. “I hope they don’t try to get Edward drunk and do something stupid.”

“Don’t worry, Bella, Emmett and Jasper love you like a sister. They wouldn’t do that to you,” Alice said, trying to put the smile back on my face instead of the worried look that was now there. “Besides, we girls have a little something planned for you tonight, too.”

“Oh, no, Alice, I’m not going to any cheesy strip club and watch nearly naked men shake their junk in my face. It’s not happening!”

“Who said anything about a club? I have friends that deliver,” she said with an evil grin that I’d learned to fear more than death itself. Alice and Rose had dug through my closet and laid out one of my sexier outfits, a tight black miniskirt and blue low cut blouse ensemble with black patent stilettos Alice insisted I needed on our last shopping trip. She no doubt had a plan when she forced me to buy it, and now I understood what she had been up to.

I started to protest, but Alice and Rose both shushed me, shoving me into the bathroom for a shower with a warning to hurry or they would come in and bath me themselves. I had no doubt they meant business, so I made quick work of the shower gel and shampoo, stopping for a quick turn with the razor on my legs before stepping out and drying off.

Rose and Alice had gotten dressed while I was in the shower and looked amazingly sexy. They were waiting for me, and after a bit of squeezing and tugging, I was fully dressed and ready for the glam squad. Rose worked on my face while Alice did my hair. Half an hour later, I didn’t recognize myself as I stood looking into the long mirror in the corner of my room.

“Honestly, guys, this is over the top! What could you possibly have planned that requires me to look like this?” I should have known better than to ask that question with those two.

We piled into my car, Rose behind the wheel, and headed off to destinations unbeknown to me. I was starting to get very nervous and wished Edward was here with me. Renee had practically thrown him out of the house this morning, citing bad luck, forcing him to spend the night with Emmett. He was getting dressed there, and then Emmett and Jasper were charged with getting him back to the house in time for the wedding. I hadn’t seen him all day, and I was missing him terribly.

Alice was in the back seat behind me, and when Rose turned and nodded at her, a blindfold was slipped over my head. Alice threatened to tie it around my neck, tightly, if I continued to squirm and protest, so I sat still with my arms crossed over my chest while she tied it behind my head, blocking my view of where we were going. I felt the car turn, and then pull into a drive and stop. I couldn’t see a thing, so Alice and Rose helped me out of the car, both taking an arm and leading me inside, to where, I had no idea. They both instructed me that I had to be absolutely silent or they would bind and gag me as well. Again, knowing them, they would do it, so I obeyed.

They led me into a room and closed the door behind me, where I was allowed to take off my blindfold for a few minutes. It was very nice, obviously someone’s home. Sitting around the room were three elderly gentlemen who smiled at me, or rather grinned sheepishly, I should say. I recognized them as doctors from around the hospital, colleagues of Jasper and Edward.

“Bella, these guys are part of the little game we’re going to play tonight. Take a good look at them, because they’ll all be kissing you in a few minutes.” Rose gave me a ‘don’t even think about it’ look as I eyed the door, wondering how far away I could get in stilettos before they caught me. “Then we’re going to put the blindfold back on and one of them is going to kiss you again and you have to figure out which one it was.” She introduced me to them all, and then had me give each one of them a quick kiss so I had something to base my answer on.

There were only three of them, thank goodness, so it shouldn’t be too hard, I thought to myself. Dr. Marcus’ kiss was soft and warm, but I could feel his false teeth behind his lips when he pressed hard. Dr. Aro was a bit of a wet kisser, and very enthusiastic. Dr. Caius’s lips were very cold and thin, and his kiss was quick and grandfatherly. I was hoping for him. They were all tall, about the same height, so that wouldn’t help me determine anything.

Alice tied the blindfold back on and I was led out into a room where I could hear several people talking low and some giggling. I blushed bright red at the thought of being kissed by one of these old men in front of God only knows who. The room got very quiet as I heard my prospective kisser moving in front of me.

“Ok, soon-to-be newlywed, ready, set, kiss!” I tilted my head back slightly, waiting for one of the older gentlemen to lay one on me. At first, I was sure it was Dr. Marcus because his lips were so soft and warm when they first lightly touched mine, but he wrapped his arms around me and deepened the kiss, and I knew immediately who it was. I threw my arms around his neck and buried my hands in his hair, leaning into him as whistles and laughter rang through the crowd.

“You two better break it up before your fiancé finds out about this!” Alice teased.

“I think he already knows,” I laughed as I took off the blindfold to find Edward doing the same. The three gentlemen I had been introduced to were standing around the room, holding the hands of their lovely wives, laughing and waving to the two of us. Apparently, Edward had gone through the same drill with their wives in another room.

“Darn, now I wish it had been me,” Dr. Marcus teased. “She’s some more kisser, Edward!” His wife looked up at him smiling, then grabbed his face and planted a huge kiss on him. He staggered a little, and then wrapped his arms around her, looking lovingly into her eyes with their foreheads together, still obviously very much in love.

“I hope you guys aren’t too disappointed about no strippers or hookers,” Jasper said, grinning from ear to ear. “We decided to spring a shower on you instead.”

Renee and Charlie were sitting in the back of the room, along with Esme, Carlisle, Stephenie and Madelyn, and several people from work and the hospital came as well. I was surprised to see Dr. Black and Dr. Cheney come in, as well as Dr. Stanley. Angela came as well, and when Dr. Cheney saw her, his demeanor totally changed. I quietly crossed my fingers and hoped she could be the one to tame him. From the looks passing between them, the distinct possibility suddenly existed that Dr. Ben Cheney just might be off the market soon.

“Hey, soon-to-be Mrs. Masen, no hard feelings, huh?” Dr. Black said as he pulled me into a quick tight hug. “If you ever decide to ditch him, though, you know where to find me.” He winked and grinned at me, clapping Edward on the shoulder as he passed. He then spotted Leah, one of my attractive co-workers, and he was off to go annoy her. However, by the looks on their faces when he took her hands in his, I would say she didn’t mind and maybe he had found what he was looking for. Edward grinned at the two of them and then pulled me into his arms and looked at me with those green eyes that melted my heart.

“Me ditching you is not gonna happen in my lifetime,” I whispered into Edward’s ear, capturing his lips again for another kiss. I saw Dr. Stanley watching us from across the room, smiling slightly. I smiled back at her, still in Edward’s arms, causing her to nod slightly and return to her conversation with and Dr. Marcus.

“Edward, is Dr. Stanley alright? She just smiled at me. Nicely and normally. I feel like I’m missing something.” Edward laughed and was about to clue me in when we were interrupted by Emmett, who pulled us into the living room and directed us to sit on the sofa behind a huge pile of gifts. Everyone filed in and found seats, waiting for us to begin opening them.

“Thank you so much, everyone. We had no idea. I thought for sure we were going to be forced into dodging stranger’s body parts tonight. I’m so grateful you didn’t put us through that!” Everyone laughed at that, and then we got busy. There were many beautiful and useful things, everyone had been so generous.

I laughed and cried at the same time when I opened the gift from Esme and Carlisle. It was a photo album filled with pictures of Emmet and Edward and his family from when they were small, a tiny suit of blue baby clothes for a little boy, a darling tiny pink dress for a baby girl, and a toy doctor kit that looked well played with.

“This was the outfit Edward was brought home from the hospital in. Elizabeth gave it to me for Emmett, and I kept it all these years,” she said, pointing to the little blue outfit in my lap. “She got me the dress shortly after Emmett was born because I was so convinced we would have a girl next. Little did Elizabeth know at the time that it would take me over twenty years to accomplish it,” she giggled through her tears. “I know she would be thrilled if you had a use for them.”

As I looked at the toy doctor kit, she laughed. “That was Edward’s first introduction to the world of medicine. Carlisle bought it for his sixth birthday. He already knew he wanted to be a doctor then, and talked Carlisle into buying it for him. I don’t know how many rolls of toilet paper and bags of M&M’s we went through as he bandaged Emmett up and medicated him,” Esme giggled, tears still in her eyes from the fond memories. Edward and I hugged her and Carlisle, both of us with tear stained cheeks as well.

“Hey, I even let him think he beat me up a few times just to get his M&M’s!” Emmett teased Edward, smacking him on the back of the head.

“Well, you did need the toilet paper because you were such an a…” Edward stopped himself before he said it, looking at Esme as she growled loudly and shot him her best motherly looking warning glare, pointing at Stephenie and Madelyn. “Sorry, mom,” he grinned at Esme as the room erupted in laughter.

There was one last gift, and when Edward sat it in my lap, I could feel how heavy it was. It was from Renee. I opened the box to find two of my mother’s most prized possessions. Inside were a huge, ancient cast iron Dutch oven that had been well taken care of and well seasoned, and a large skillet of the same type. I remembered my grandmother telling stories about them when I was small as Renee cooked the best pot roasts and cornbread ever in them.

“Mom, are you sure you want to part with these?” I asked, surprised and honored that she would give them to me. Edward looked confused, so Renee explained to him the significance of the pieces.

“My great great grandmother got these when she was a new bride, and many good meals have been cooked in them. When they left their home and traveled west to homestead, she would bury the Dutch oven in the ashes of the camp fire with dough inside to bake bread. She used them until her oldest daughter married, my great grandmother, and then passed them on to her. They’ve been passed down through the generations to the first daughter upon marriage as a tradition. Now it’s my turn to pass them to you, Bella. Use them well, and may they continue on down the line to my granddaughter, and beyond.”

I was in awe as I literally held two pieces of history in my hands. My history. I felt a great sense of pride, and responsibility, being handed down these symbols of the chain that linked me to a long line of strong, capable, and fruitful women. I would use them, and honor the memories of those women, without whom I wouldn’t be here, and whose presence I could feel very strongly now as they were remembered. I truly felt as if I was surrounded by their love and protection.

Emmett and Jasper loaded our gifts into their cars, wrapping up a perfectly wonderful evening. However, I knew I was going home alone, which had me on the verge of tears. Edward pulled me into his arms, also distraught at the prospect of spending the night without me. We had become so much a part of each other that time away was actually painful.

“I’ll be there tomorrow, love. And tonight will be the last night you spend as a single woman, so you had better enjoy it while you can.” He tried to flash me a smile, but the moisture on his lashes gave him away.

“I’ll miss you, too,” I said as we brushed away each other’s tears, and then kissed each other one last time before saying goodnight. My heart left with him when he walked out the door with Emmett.

After a restless night of little sleep, I awoke to the sounds of laughter coming from the kitchen downstairs. I threw on some clothes and went down to find Renee and Esme filling and covering trays with hors d’ oeuvres while Alice and Rose laid out service for the reception. Stephenie had Mary Noelle strapped to her chest in a carrier, and Madelyn was busy adding the final flowers to the cake, which had been moved to a draped rolling cart. Abigail and Marisol had been given the task of keeping Sebastian and Felicity entertained with feather toys to keep them away from the cake. Felicity had shown an enthusiastic preference for butter cream the night before much to Madelyn’s dismay; hence the extra flowers down the nibbled side after a quick repair to the icing. She suggested that piece be for her big brother, BB. He would eat anything.

I heard Charlie calling my name from the apartment, and went through the closet doors to find him lying in bed, resting up for the big job ahead; giving me away to Edward. “Hey, Bells. Come here a minute.” Charlie patted the bed next to him, and I lay down and cuddled up to him, laying my head on his shoulder. He kissed the top of my head and sighed deeply. “You know, the pollen count today is going to be really high,” he grinned as he played with a strand of my hair. “I just know I’m going to need at least two handkerchiefs today to get through the watery eyes. You know how much pollen makes my eyes water, right?”

“Sure, dad. Do you want some antihistamines? They could help with those allergy symptoms,” I teased. “In fact, if I wasn’t sure I’d fall down the stairs, I’d consider taking some myself.”

“Nah. On days like today, nothing helps. I guess I’ll just have to get through it, and everyone will just have to put up with me sniffling and mopping my eyes like I was crying or something. In fact, besides the day you were born, this will probably be the worst allergy attack I’ll ever have. I can already feel it coming on.” I looked up into his eyes, and sure enough, they were red and watery. He smiled at me and kissed my cheek that was also wet.

“You know you’ll always be my first love, right, daddy? Remember when I was little and declared to mom that I was going to marry you, too. Funny what a new puppy will make a girl want to do.” I laughed at the memory of Renee trying to explain to me that Charlie was already taken and I would just have to find myself another man. Mission accomplished.

“He’s a good man, Bells. I have no doubts about how much he loves you, and me and your mom, for that matter. I’m proud to call him my son.” Renee came in at that point to help Charlie start getting ready. He was recovering nicely from the heart attack and surgery, but was still a little weak and sore, so he was moving slowly. I hugged him and kissed the tip of his nose before heading back to the kitchen to help with last minute preparations.

By two o’clock we were rotating through showers and began the process of beautification. Alice worked on my hair, piling it high on my head, then curling the ends and tendrils that fell around my face. After looking at me for a moment, Renee ran downstairs and came back with one of the older photo albums. She opened it to a page in the front and turned it to show me the picture that had tears streaming down her face. It was a picture of Grammy wearing the same gown I was now wearing, her hair exactly like mine. We could have been twin sisters.

Rose clasped the pearl necklace Grammy had gotten me around my neck and Esme clipped the earrings into place. Alice placed the pearl and blue crystal hair combs into my hair that had been in the trunk with the dress, and Renee placed her pearl bracelet she was loaning me for the wedding next to Grammy’s around my wrist. Rose slipped my new shoes onto my feet, and then turned me to look in the mirror. I blinked, and for a very fleeting moment, I could have sworn I saw Grammy and Poppa standing beside me in the reflection, smiling widely at me and holding hands. I could smell ‘Roses Roses’, Grammy’s favorite old Avon perfume. She always wore it because Poppa loved it. He used to say it always reminded him of springtime. There was a gentle knock at the door, and Charlie poked his head in. He looked at me and suddenly, his ‘allergies’ kicked in.

“I warned you, didn’t I?” he muttered as he mopped his face with the handkerchief he already had in his hand. “The pollen is even worse than I thought it would be.” He took my hands and stood there looking at me, fighting back the tears that won and rolled down his cheeks. “Just look at my baby girl, all grown up. Bella, you’re a vision to behold.”

“Thanks, dad. But you’re going to have Rose furious at you when she has to redo my makeup,” I teased him as my own tears threatened to spill over. Thank heavens Rose used waterproof mascara.

“Thank you, Bells, for not giving me too many gray hairs, not costing me a fortune in bail money,” he laughed, “And not making me question whether I did a good job as a father. I couldn’t have asked for a better daughter. I’m so proud of you, Bella, and I’m proud of the quality of woman you’ve turned out to be. I like to think I had a little something to do with it, but I had so much to work with. I hope Edward realizes the treasure he’s getting, truly a treasure worth more than rubies.” (Proverbs 31:10-31)

He kissed my cheek before gently lowering my veil and leading me towards the stairs. Everyone else had gone downstairs, and Charlie helped me slowly down so I wouldn’t trip. The sound of the beautiful piano music Edward had recorded was playing softly from the living room. Dorianne went in before us, tossing handfuls of rose petals around like a toddling ballerina fairy, followed by Marisol, carrying our rings. Charlie and I entered, and everyone stood up. Edward, Jasper, and Emmett were standing at the front of the room, and the suits they were wearing were right out of a turn of the century novel. Edward had tamed his hair down into a style befitting the era, and his piercing green eyes followed me as I came to him between the rows of chairs. I was so happy when I saw Paul, the young man who survived the brutal attack from his stepfather, stand up and smile at me from next to his mother, Emily. The fact that he was standing was a miracle in itself considering the doctors figured he may never walk again. Madelyn was standing shyly next to him, grinning from ear to ear, and the look on their faces when their eyes met was priceless. Emily noticed it, too, and I winked at her as Charlie and I passed.

Charlie led me up to Edward and placed my hand in his. “This is my world and my heart I’m putting in your hands. Take good care of her,” Charlie whispered before taking his seat next to Renee. The chaplain greeted everyone, then began by reading from the bible Colossians 3:12-24, the words we chose as our vows, and as a guide to us for our lives together and wise counsel, not only for us, but all present:

Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;

Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.

And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.

And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.

And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.

Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God;

And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;

Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ

“Vow to do these things unto each other, and to those whom you love and serve, and surely the blessings of the Lord shall be upon you.” The chaplain then led us through the ring exchange, blessing them as a symbol of our union, and then declared us one.

“You may kiss your bride,” he smiled at Edward. Edward lifted my veil, placing it gently behind me before taking me in his arms and placing the sweetest, gentlest kiss on my lips. Apparently, everyone in the room was suffering from the same allergens as Charlie.

“Ladies and gentlemen, by being here, you’ve agreed to sustain the completed union of Mr. and Mrs. Edward Masen,” he presented us to our guests. “May they live eternally in God’s grace and with your unbounded love.”

While we moved into the parlor for pictures, helpers from the rental company quickly and efficiently brought in small tables, linens and more candle centerpieces, rearranging the chairs and dressing the tables, creating a lovely dining room and buffet area. Once everyone had been seated, Jasper and Emmett stood up to offer a toast.

“To Edward and Bella,” Emmett began, “May you always have everything you need, be blessed with as much good fortune as fate allows, and always know you are loved by more than just each other.”

Jasper looked at us and smiled, then recited an original poem he wrote just for us: “Life is but a fleeting glance, a road to cross, a hurried chance. But add love in and life becomes, a place called home, a world above. Two hearts joined in one accord, can brave the tempests, survive the storms. Within your arms is heaven together, and may you have found, truest love, forever. To Edward and Bella.” Everyone raised their glasses and toasted us, and of course, I cried at their beautiful words.

Jasper and Emmett disappeared for a while, coming back with grins that indicated pure mischief was afoot. I could only imagine what those two had been up to, but I was certain it involved embarrassing me. The rest of the reception went beautifully, and I was so glad we had opted for a small, quick, and very old fashioned wedding at home. There was not one thing I would have done any different.

Edward and I were only able to go away for the rest of the weekend due to work, but planned a proper honeymoon in a few weeks when we both had time off. We quickly changed and headed outside amid a shower of birdseed to leave for our hotel, stopping half way down the sidewalk at the sight of Edward’s car. Emmett and Jasper had tied the usual junk to the bumper and wrote all over the windows on the passenger side with white, ‘Virgin on Board…but not for long!’. I just about died, and vowed to teach their children how to do something obnoxious as payback. Edward opened the door for me and cursed as a pile of inflated condom balloons fell out around my feet.

“Very mature, gentlemen,” Edward groaned as he raked the rest out of his car and threatened them if they didn’t clean the mess up out of the street. While he was busy griping at Emmett and Jasper, I looked over in the fading light of sunset and saw a man standing on the sidewalk, staring at me. He wore a hooded sweatshirt, and when he pushed it back, I recognized him from a memory long ago. Laurent Dubois. The setting sunlight glistened on the tears streaming down his face as he stared at me with a look that both broke my heart and scared me to death. I moved to go speak to him, but a woman, also wearing a hooded sweatshirt with the hood up, jumped out of the car waiting by the curb and dragged him back, forcing him to sit in the passenger seat before closing the door after him and speeding away.

It was going to take a lot of close contact and a very hot shower to calm the chills that were running up my spine at that moment.

Chapter: 13

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 13 – Nerves

Bella

My wedding couldn’t have been any more beautiful, and I was happier than I could ever remember being in my life. A serious cold front had blown in over the last couple of hours and snow had started falling, blanketing everything in a shimmering layer that glistened in the headlights. I looked over at Edward, smiling and humming along to the song playing quietly in the background. He looked as happy as I was, and when he caught me watching him, he flashed me the smile I had come to cherish so much. He was in such a wonderful mood I decided not to say anything about my visual encounter with Laurent Dubois. This was his wedding day, too, and I didn’t want both of us being distracted tonight. I decided to put the image of Laurent’s tear stained, rage filled face out of my mind and concentrate on the amazing man sitting next to me.

“So, Mr. Masen, what do you suppose we should do for the rest of the evening?” I asked coyly, looking at him from under my lashes as we pulled up to the valet station at our hotel.

“Oh, I don’t know, Mrs. Masen. I’m sure we’ll think of something,” he said in a voice I had never heard from him, low and deep, almost a whisper, and the look in his eyes made my insides quiver. He handed the car off to the valet after retrieving our bags from the backseat, and we hurried inside through the swirling snow to check in and warm up.

While Edward tipped the bellman, I opened the curtains to find that the hotel had an amazing view of the city sky line. As I took in the scenery from the window, I noticed that the CPS Complex and the hospital were just down the street. Edward came behind me and slipped his arms around my waist, kissing my neck.

“You did say you were off the rest of the weekend, right?” I teased as I turned to face him, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Not that we don’t love our jobs, but I really wanted you all to myself for the next thirty six hours. That hospital is awfully close.”

“Don’t worry, you have my undivided attention, Bella.”

I was still wearing the beautiful red coat, matching scarf, and beret Alice and Rose had given me for Christmas. Edward unwrapped the scarf and began to slowly work the buttons of my coat loose, slipping it from my shoulders and laying it across the chair next to us, along with the scarf and beret. Suddenly very nervous, I kissed him quickly and grabbed my bag, heading into the bathroom to catch my breath and calm my nerves. I undressed with shaking hands, slipping on the beautiful white gown Alice had given me for my birthday. I decided to save the teddy for tomorrow night. I was fully trembling now as I stood staring at my reflection in the mirror, a combination of excitement, anticipation, and a little bit of fear. Even though Edward and I had made out a number of times, I was entering unchartered territory. Grandma Marie had tried to explain in her cryptic way about what to expect on my wedding night, including a mention of some pain, which I wasn’t looking forward to. I was ashamed to admit that I had been a total chicken and even avoided pelvic examinations up until now, so I didn’t even have that experience to prepare me. I had never even used tampons. I was now kicking myself for not having made a gynecologist appointment before the wedding.

I had been all too ready to do this, and now the reality of it was hitting me like a ton of bricks. I knew I was now Edward’s wife and was free to enjoy whatever we wanted, but the gift I had held on to for so long, and so dearly, was about to be opened, literally, and I was suddenly terrified. I knew I should be excited and happy to finally be with Edward, but I couldn’t help but feeling like I was losing a part of myself. And I guess in a way, I was. This was my last hold on my own innocence. In my job, I watched others much younger than myself lose theirs all too soon, and I knew how valuable it was. The reality that I would do this for the first time only once made what we were about to do all the more significant, and the atmosphere, at least for me, a lot more tense.

I took a deep breath to calm myself and opened the bathroom door, stepping out to see Edward turning down the bed. He looked up at me with an appreciative smile as I stepped into the room. He held his arms out to me and I shyly moved into his embrace, meeting his lips with mine. I could tell he was trying to go slowly, but I could feel the anticipation almost rolling off of him. I was trembling even harder now as Edward’s hands came slowly to my shoulders, gently caressing my arms before gently moving to my chest. Anxiety managed to get hold of me, tears being the result. Edward had unbuttoned my gown almost half way when the first tears hit the backs of his hands, the tremors now hard enough that I was visibly shaking.

“Bella, what’s the matter?” Edward asked with concern in his voice as he tilted my head up to look into my eyes. “Did I do something wrong?” Tears were streaming down my cheeks now.

“No, I’m just a little…scared, I guess.” Edward smiled and scooped me up in his arms and kissed me gently before laying me on the bed and covering me up. I watched him as he undressed down to his boxers, joining me in bed after he had turned out all the lights. He pulled me to him, placing a sweet kiss on my forehead.

“I love you, Bella. We’ve waited this long; I’ll do whatever you want, and nothing more until you’re ready.” I cuddled up to his chest and thanked God for giving me such a sweet and understanding soul as Edward. My nerves started unwinding slowly and I was sound asleep in a matter of minutes, exhausted from the day’s events and from the emotional rollercoaster I had been on all day, not to mention the lack of decent sleep last night.

I was awakened just after midnight by people in the hallway talking loudly and laughing, obviously drunk. I looked over to see Edward sleeping peacefully next to me, the pale light coming in through the sheer curtains falling across his bare chest. I was now wide awake, so I propped myself up on my elbow and watched him sleeping. He looked so amazing, his perfect features relaxed in deep sleep. As I lay there watching him, I found myself wanting to be with him more by the moment. I slipped out of my clothes and cuddled up to him, placing gentle kisses on his chest and neck.

Edward’s arms instinctively encircled me, pulling me up on his chest. His hands were running up and down my bare body, coming to rest on my lower back, when he stopped, slowly opening his eyes.

“Hi,” I whispered. I was still a little nervous, but the fear that had gripped me earlier had subsided.

“Hi, yourself,” he whispered back to me, tracing circles on my hips softly with his fingertips. “Better now?”

“Yeah, sorry about earlier…” I started to apologize, but Edward silenced me with his lips, bringing his hands up to my hair, holding me to him, beginning the night I had waited for all my life.

I was in the middle of a wonderful dream about Edward when the sound of sirens in the distance woke me up, followed by the sound of Edward’s cell phone ringing on the dresser. He stumbled over to the dresser and looked at the phone before answering it. The look on his face in the pale light coming in through the curtains told me something was wrong. The only reason his phone would be ringing tonight was either a wrong number or an emergency so bad at the hospital they needed all hands on deck. Unfortunately, it was the latter. Edward clicked on the lights and began dressing quickly.

“Edward, what’s happened?” I asked, hearing yet more sirens. I moved to the window and watched as a processional of ambulances pulled into the emergency bay of Children’s hospital.

“There’s been a bus crash, Bella. A school bus full of kids coming back from a band competition hit an embankment when someone jumped off an overpass. The bus driver swerved to avoid hitting the jumper and lost control. The roads are slick and the bus rolled before it hit…” Edward was visibly upset as he gathered the rest of his things. I dressed and packed quickly, knowing there would be families needing help and support. I grabbed my coat, scarf, and beret as we ran out the door. I stopped at the counter and checked out while Edward ran for his car, picking me up at the door. The hospital was only blocks away, but it was bitterly cold now, and walking would have been unbearable. We pulled into the physician’s garage and both ran for the hospital, Edward holding on to me to keep me from falling.

The scene in the emergency room was organized chaos, and heartbreaking. Stretchers lined the walls, and there were more coming in. The sounds of the injured children screaming and crying didn’t unnerve me as I passed them nearly as badly as the ones that made no sound. I hurried to get to the emergency waiting area, spotting Emmett at the end of the corridor. He and another officer were coming in behind an EMT pushing a stretcher with an adult on it heading for the morgue. I presumed it to be the bus driver, but it wasn’t.

“…Crazy fool! His stupidity caused all this. Too bad he died before he…” I heard the EMT ranting as they approached. The sheet covering his body slipped down as they passed me and I couldn’t help but look at the face of the man whose actions had cost some of these children their lives. He was badly mangled, but I fell back against the wall and gasped when I recognized who he was. Laurent Dubois.

I felt instantly sick to my stomach. The evening of my wedding flashed back to me, and I remembered him standing on the sidewalk staring at me; the tears, the broken look on his face, the anger. Would he have done this because of me? The thought that I could even remotely be the root of this nightmare had me running for the restroom, doubling over the toilet as I wretched uncontrollably.

“Bella, are you ok?” I could hear Emmett’s frantic voice on the other side of the door. “Bella, open up!”

I opened the door and staggered out, collapsing in Emmett’s arms. He carried me to the waiting area, unbuttoning my coat so he could help me out of it. I was sobbing by now, looking more like one of the parents around me than someone there to help. I tried to pull myself together. I wasn’t here to be cared for. I needed to suck it up and help those around me. I could fall apart later when I had Edward to help put me back together. I took a deep breath and looked at Emmett.

“The name of the man you brought in is Laurent Dubois. I knew him from when we were kids,” I told Emmett.

“Was he the guy standing on the sidewalk the other day?” Emmett asked and I nodded. “I thought he looked familiar. I noticed him standing there while we were putting the stuff in Edward’s car. You guys hadn’t come out of the house yet and that chick he was with kept yelling at him to ‘get over it’ and stop his blubbering and get back in the car. Then you guys came out to leave and she dragged him off. He was one creepy dude!”

Emmett’s words made me feel weak again, but I pushed it down and stood up. “How many kids were on that bus,” I asked, holding my breath.

“Over forty,” Emmett said quietly. “Thirteen are dead so far, seventeen more are critical, and the rest, plus the chaperons, are in less serious condition, but still, no one on the bus escaped injury of some sort.”

I took several deep breaths, trying to calm myself. Get a grip, Bella. It’s not about you right now, I told myself. I spent the rest of the night and into the next helping and comforting scared and grieving families. Two more children died, bringing the fatality total up to fifteen. During a lull in the chaos, I had a chance to go in search of Edward. I hoped to catch him between surgeries for a much needed hug. Alice and Rose had both joined me during the night to help where they could and had gone to the cafeteria for coffee. I walked past the door to the stairwell, looking back over my shoulder a few feet down the corridor as I passed. Nothing. As horrible as everything had been and as bad as I felt, I guiltily enjoyed a moment of relief. I was almost certain now it had been Laurent watching me. I just knew it in my bones, yet I still couldn’t help but feel wary.

The day continued on with a constant parade of friends, parents, and family members coming to either check on a student, help the grieving, or bring comfort to those who still had hope. Every time someone would approach the doors, the extent of the bitter weather outside was evident by the freezing blast of air that accompanied them. The horrid gray weather was fitting for the mood around the hospital.

I had moved up to the second floor, outside the surgery center, and was waiting for Edward to come out from his last surgery when Dr. Stanley emerged, looking tired and frazzled. She sat down across from me and leaned her head back against the wall, closing her eyes. In that moment, I actually felt compassion towards her.

She looked over at me and smiled a tired smile. “You’re one lucky lady,” she finally spoke, surprising me. “He’s an amazing man. I really do wish you both the best.” She seemed like she wanted to say more, but she was fighting to keep her eyes open.

“Thank you,” I said, smiling back at her. I wasn’t sure what else to say. Our past interactions hadn’t been exactly friendly and I certainly was in no condition to get into anything with her right now. She didn’t appear to be any better.

She looked down at her watch and laughed through a yawn. “I’ve been here for forty nine hours straight. My kittens are going to think I abandoned them. I’ll bet they’re probably getting hungry, too. I didn’t have a chance to call anyone to go feed them today. I should go feed them soon myself.”

I smiled at the thought of Sebastian and Felicity. I was so glad Renee and Charlie were staying at the house and could care for them while we were here. “Do you need to stay here?” I asked. “Would you like me to go take care of them for you?” I don’t know what possessed me to offer, I guess I was feeling charitable, and a little bit sorry for her.

“Thanks, but that’s ok. I just live in the condos across the street. It won’t take me but a few minutes to walk over there and feed them. I think I could use a shower, anyway,” she laughed tiredly.

“You had better bundle up then. It’s freezing outside,” I said.

“Dang it. When I came in the other day, it was still fairly mild so I just grabbed a sweater. I guess I’ll have to run then,” she sighed. She was being so nice for a change, and looked so tired. I just couldn’t stand the idea of her freezing while trying to care for her pets.

“Here, take my coat and stuff. I’ll be here for a few more hours at least, so you can just grab yours while you’re there and bring mine when you come back.” I slipped my red coat up on her arms and handed her my beret. She twisted her hair up and pulled the beret over it, then wrapped the scarf around her. Fortunately, we were close to the same size, so it fit her great.

“Thanks, Bella. You really are sweet. I can see now why everyone around here loves you so much.” She pecked my cheek quickly before heading down the hall. Maybe she wasn’t so bad after all, I thought to myself as I turned to sit back down. I looked up in time to see the door swing closed behind her under the exit sign down the hall.

Edward came out of the surgery center shortly after that, looking like he was about to drop. He had been in surgery almost non-stop since coming into the hospital. He sat down beside me as a couple of other doctors and scrub nurses filed past, looking just as tired. I wrapped my arm around his shoulders and pulled his head over onto my chest. He stayed like that for a while, but bolted upright at the sound of a bloodcurdling scream coming from beyond the nurses’ station. One of the nurses came running back down the corridor moments later screaming for help, “SOMEBODY HELP! DR. STANLEY’S BEEN ATTACKED…!!!”

Edward leapt to his feet and ran behind the screaming nurse, into the stairwell. I stopped at the door, unable to follow. Edward came back, white as a ghost and shaking, “Call security, Dr. Stanley’s been murdered.”

I ran to the nearest nurses’ station and grabbed the phone, quickly dialing security. The hospital went into emergency lockdown and was almost immediately flooded by hospital security and the police. The hospital was already in an upheaval due to the bus crash drama, and now everything seemed like it was surreally out of control. The staff was busy trying to calm the children and visitors and keep everyone in their rooms as much as possible, but there was an underlying sense of fear engulfing the entire hospital. I sank into a chair across from the nurses’ station and watched blankly as the mayhem unfolded around me. I had gone into sensory overload.

After what felt like hours of interviews and examination of the crime scene, I watched in horror as the body of Dr. Stanley was brought out of the stairwell. Her throat had been slit from ear to ear according to the medical examiner, and they believe the attacker ambushed her from behind and she probably never saw who did it or even knew what was happening. It also happened in a “blind zone” in the stairwell that wasn’t covered by security cameras. Whoever killed Dr. Stanley knew how to skirt around in the stairwells away from the cameras; probably someone who had spent a lot of time in them and knew them well enough to be able to completely avoid detection or raise suspicion.

Edward spent more than an hour talking to the detectives, the medical examiner, and the police, as did the nurse who found the body. The only thing found at the crime scene was a smeared partial bloody shoe print, and a single crumpled pink rose petal that couldn’t be linked to anything. The police on the scene speculated it could have been dropped and stepped on by someone delivering flowers to the hospital. However, it was collected by the investigators as potential evidence. Emmett was still at the hospital, caught in the lockdown, and remembered something when he overheard them talking.

“That’s really weird,” he said to Edward, “They found a few crumpled rose petals in the bridge jumper’s shoe, but I really doubt he had anything to do with this. He was little more than a pile of broken bones when we brought him into the morgue hours ago.”

The mention of Laurent Dubois again sent my heart racing and my stomach flipping as I began to sink down to the floor. Edward was beside me in an instant, helping me to a seat in a nearby waiting area. Between the stress of the day and the fact that I hadn’t eaten, I was near fainting. Emmett went and found some juice for me then headed back to talk to the investigators while Edward held me around the waist, encouraging me to finish the juice.

“You really need to go home, Bella. As soon as the police let people leave, I want you to get a cab and head straight there and get into bed.” I started to protest, but Emmett came back just then with Rose in tow.

“We’ll take her home, Edward, and make sure she eats something. The police are allowing some people to leave now, and she should be cleared.” I went to get my coat, and then remembered where it was. I stood there for a moment, frozen with terror as it sank in, turning a paler shade of pale as the realization hit me. Edward caught and steadied me before I hit the floor.

“She was wearing my coat, Edward,” I managed to whisper out chokingly. “I loaned it to her so she could go check on her kittens. She looked just like me from the back when she left…” My eyes were almost as big as Emmett’s and Rose’s. The color drained from Edward’s face. Emmett ran over and got one of the police detectives to come speak with me. I told her about loaning Dr. Stanley my coat, hat, and scarf so she would be warm enough to walk home to check on her pets. The stairwell….Grammy and Poppa warned me…

Logic was telling me this was probably some random act of violence, but my gut told me I was the one who was supposed to be on that table in the morgue, not Dr. Stanley. My nerves were already shot, and adding this only served to take me over the edge. I stood up to leave with Emmett and Rose, and that's the last thing I remembered.

Edward

I had always imagined my wedding night as being the best night of my life. When Bella walked out of the bathroom wearing the gown I had only gotten a glimpse of at her birthday party, my entire body responded. I couldn't wait to leave it in a pile on the floor. What I didn't expect were the tears that fell on my hands, and seeing her trembling like a frightened child. With that reaction, there was no way I was going to do anything to her. I wanted it to be good for both of us, and right then all she needed was my arms. The rest of me would have to wait.

I was awakened a few hours later by Bella's gentle kisses. As my hands enjoyed the feel of her against me, I realized she had shed her clothing and she definitely wasn't crying anymore. She was ready for me, and I was more than ready for her. It was all I could do to slow down and be gentle with her. Her body called to me, awakening every cell in me to the point of bursting. The love we made was slow, almost torturous for me, but I knew if I tore into her like my body wanted to, I would hurt her. She didn't seem to get a lot out of it the first time, but for me, the feeling of her around me was amazing, not only the first time, but the other four as well. I couldn't get enough of her, and by the second time, we were both screaming, but it wasn’t from pain.

When my phone rang in the early hours of the morning, I almost didn't bother to get up and answer it. Bella was curled up tightly to my chest, my arms wrapped securely around her. I wasn't on call, but I knew if it was the hospital, there was a good reason. I had no idea it would be something so horrific. I had worked on victims from car accidents, struck pedestrians, and CPS cases, but I had never seen anything like this. There were so many broken little bodies. They were fifth graders, ten and eleven years old.

The scene in the corridors was heart wrenching. The bus had rolled multiple times and landed on its side, throwing everyone inside around like rag dolls. The injuries ranged from cuts and scrapes, to deep lacerations and broken bones in every part of the body imaginable. Seven of the children had serious facial damage, and I was trying to help get them stabilized when I saw Emmett helping Bella into the waiting room. I wanted to run to her, but the child I was working on would suffocate if I didn’t move quickly, so I had to leave her in Emmett’s hands.

We were moving the last of the children towards the O-R when I saw Emmett coming back down the hall. “Emmett, what was the matter with Bella?” I asked as we were passing. I let the nurses continue towards the O-R while I stopped to speak to Emmett for a moment.

“She was just freaked, man, that’s all,” Emmett said. “She knew the dude that jumped off that damn bridge and caused all this mess.”

“Who was he?” I asked, concerned that someone Bella cared about had died.

“She said his name was Laurent Dubois. He was actually standing outside when you guys were leaving after the wedding the other day. Didn’t you see him?”

I thought about it, but all I could remember was trying to get the damn inflated condoms out of the car so I could get Bella to the hotel as fast as possible to begin our wedding night. Laurent Dubois. The kid from the picture her grandmother left her. No wonder she was so upset.

“No, man. I was too distracted,” I said. “I’ll catch you later, I’ve got to get to surgery.”

I ran to catch up with the nurses, the whole time remembering all the things Bella said about Dubois and how he used to watch her. All during surgery, it played in the back of my mind.

The last child we were working on had head injuries, plus internal damage to her chest. Dr. Stanley was called in for this one due to the damage around the girl’s heart and sternum.

“So, Edward,” she asked while stapling the girl’s incision closed, “How was the honeymoon?”

“Too short,” I replied, not looking to share details with her. We were barely on speaking terms as it was due to her constant sexual overtures towards me, and I really wasn’t in the mood right now to deal with her.

“Sorry to hear that,” was all she said. I looked up at her and she smiled at me from under her mask and winked at me, but not in her usual way, for which I was grateful. “By the way, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable in the past. I was just trying too hard, and you really are a great guy. Who could blame me for wanting the best?” she giggled while continuing to work.

“Thanks, I think. Anyway, this is a refreshing change, Dr. Stanley,” I said as I finished the stitches I was working on. “I had just about written you off as being totally incorrigible. You keep this up and working with you may actually be tolerable,” I said with a smile and a nod.

She laughed a little. “Well, you can credit it to my new love life. I finally found the man of my dreams,” she said. “I actually think I may be in love.”

“Well, good for you. I know what love has done for me, and I highly recommend it.” We both smiled and nodded to each other. I was glad to hear she found someone. Maybe it would mellow her out a bit. She really was a good doctor, and if she continued on like this, maybe someday she could even be considered a friend.

We were in surgery for hours, working almost in assembly line fashion. Dr. Stanley finished her portion of the last surgery and headed out, obviously as exhausted as I was. When I finally finished the last sutures on the last child, I was barely able to stand up. Bella was waiting outside the surgery center for me, and I was never so grateful for her soft chest to lay my head down on for a few minutes.

I was on the verge of dozing off when I heard the screaming. I wasn't prepared for what I saw when I entered the stairwell. Dr. Stanley was lying face down in a massive pool of blood, and it had run in little cascades down the steps. I could tell without touching her that she was dead. That amount of blood loss would be fatal for anyone. From the side I could see the wound on her neck. It looked like whoever did this did it in a fit of rage from what I could see of the brutal execution of the wound. I didn't disturb anything and went back up and called to Bella to summon hospital security.

All hell broke loose after that, and I watched Bella gradually lose her fight to stay conscious, as with each new thing, she grew paler. Remembering that Dr. Stanley had borrowed her coat was the final straw.

The detective had finished taking Bella’s statement, and she stood up to leave with Emmett and Rosalie, and immediately collapsed. Her mind lost the fight I caught her before she hit the floor, and took her to a nearby empty patient room, laying her on the bed. One of the nurses from the nurses’ station saw everything and ran in, bringing me a stethoscope and an adult sized pressure cuff, and started taking Bella’s vitals while I checked her over, trying to revive her.

“Edward, what happened,” I heard a familiar voice behind me. I turned to see Carlisle coming around to the other side of the bed. “I heard about the bus crash and came in to see what I could do to help. Is she alright?” Carlisle asked.

“I think she fainted. She’s been here since yesterday with nothing to eat and no rest. She’s so exhausted.” I told him about everything she had been through as Carlisle gently stroked her hair. Bella still hadn’t come to and I was starting to get worried. Carlisle examined her eyes, looking her over before turning to me.

“She’s seen a lot in the past thirty six hours. Let her mind rest and protect itself, Edward,” he told me. “She’s a strong woman, but things like this get to even the strongest amongst us. Go get a cup of coffee or something. I’ll stay with her until you get back. If she wakes up before then, I’ll call you. You need to take care of yourself, too. She’s going to need your strength to get through this.”

“Thank you, Carlisle. I think she needs more help than I can give her myself right now, and I think I know just who to talk to.”

I leaned down and kissed her cheek gently. I knew she had been working as hard as I had been since we got here, helping families, comforting the grieving loved ones, and looking out for everyone else but herself. She was a vision to behold, and as she lay there, I gazed at her beautiful face and wondered how I was ever so lucky to have her as my wife, and how I was even luckier, and blessed beyond measure, to have her lying here now, breathing and alive.

I had spent a lot of time in my life thanking God for the blessings he had showered on me, but he was going to be hearing thanks and praises from me a lot more from now on.

Chapter: 14

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 14 – Sanctuary

Bella

“She’s still so cute when she’s napping,” I heard Grammy whisper to Poppa. I rose up and looked around me to find I had been lying on the front porch of the house. Grammy and Poppa were on the porch swing, holding hands. Poppa was nuzzling Grammy’s neck and she giggled. It was bright and warm, and all the neighborhood kids were outside playing.

“Memories are an amazing thing, aren’t they dear,” Grammy said to me, motioning for me to come and sit down in front of her so she could brush my hair like she use to do when I was small. “I always loved to play with your hair,” Grammy giggled to me as she continued to run her fingers through the strands. “I use to fight with Renee to keep her from cutting it. I know it was a lot of work, but it was always so beautiful.”

I watched the children in the neighborhood playing as Grammy continued to brush my hair, braiding it into long braids like she did when I was six. A striking little blond haired girl, probably no more than four, was riding a tricycle down the sidewalk, a skateboard tied to the back of it with a cardboard box tied to the skateboard. She stopped in front of the house when I waved at her, a huge grin across her face.

“Hi!” I called out to her. She climbed off the tricycle and went back to the box, pulling out two tiny kittens. She came running up to the house and handed them to me.

“This one is Tristan. He’s a boy,” she said with a giggle as she patted the black kitten’s head. “And this one is Penelope. She’s a girl.” Penelope was a fuzzy ball of pure white. “They’re really hungry,” she said as she ran towards the sidewalk. I had no idea who this child was, or why she was handing me her pets.

“Wait, what’s your name?” I asked as she peddled away. She turned around in the neighbor’s driveway before heading back in the direction she came.

“Jessie,” she called to me as she passed the house again. She was laughing and singing as she peddled down the sidewalk, but stopped in front of the house next door. She was glaring up the walkway at something, or someone, and I stood up from Grammy and walked a few feet down in front of the house so I could see where her glare was aimed. On the front steps of the house next door was another little girl, about the same age, completely ignoring her. Her delicate hair flipped in the breeze as she played with a Barbie and sang to herself. However, when she looked up at me, I felt like ice water was being poured down my back. She seemed familiar, but I couldn’t quite place her. The Barbie in her hand had long brown hair, and she proceeded to wrench the head from the doll as she continued to stare at me with cold eyes. She collected her toys and ran back into the house, sticking her tongue out at Jessie as she went.

Jessie started peddling again, heading back down the sidewalk towards the direction she had come from, passing a little boy who walked the opposite direction. He passed in front of the house, waving at Grammy and Poppa as he went, stopping only a brief moment to stare at me before moving on.

Grammy called me back to the porch, where I sat back down and pulled the kittens into my lap as she continued brushing my hair. “Rest, Bella,” Grammy whispered to me, laying my head in her lap. Poppa leaned over and kissed my cheek.

“Better do what your Grammy says and enjoy it while you can. You’re going to be busy before you know it,” he whispered in my ear and grinned before heading to the door. Before he went in, he stopped and turned to me. “You’re a good girl, Bella. Remember, my love, sanctuary is found in the arms of those you love.” He looked at me a long moment, smiling again before going inside.

I closed my eyes and listened to Grammy hum a familiar tune, one she use to sing to me when she laid me down for a nap when I was small. I drifted off to the sound of her sweet voice echoing in my head.

Sounds around me were continuing to echo somewhat as I opened my eyes slowly, disoriented and cold. Edward was sitting in a chair next to the bed I was in with his head leaned back, sleeping. He looked so tired I didn’t have the heart to wake him. I couldn’t remember exactly how I got here, the last thing I remember was….oh, god.

The memories of the traumatic events I had witnessed before I passed out came flooding back to me, causing me to start shaking all over again. I tried to control the sobs, but Edward must have been sleeping lightly, because he was up in the bed pulling me into his chest before I even saw him move.

“Shh, Bella, it’s ok, it’s ok…” he whispered to me as he rocked me in his arms.

“Edward, it was me!” I sobbed. “All this was because of me.” I couldn’t stop shaking, grief and fear racking my body. Grief for all the people who died because of me, and fear that I would be next. “I’m so sorry…”

Edward continued to hold and rock me. “Bella, no,” he said softly, “It’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

In my heart, I wanted to believe him, but I knew if it weren’t for me, none of this would have happened. My very existence caused the death of seventeen people. I want to die myself. I deserve to die. I was so far gone in grief I didn’t even realize I had muttered those thoughts out loud.

“Stop it, Bella!” Edward roared at me, shaking me slightly. “You had no control over any of this. Don’t even think about dying! Please don’t, I couldn’t bear it.”

Edward wrapped me up in his arms and was sobbing into my neck, his whole body racking with the force of his emotions. Seeing him this way brought me out of my depths of despair and I knew I couldn’t keep doing this to him; my heart wanted to believe I didn’t do this, any of it. I knew I lived to make life better for others, not take it. And wishing my own life away would take yet another life; Edward’s. We were two parts of one whole, and if one of us were to die, the other one wouldn’t be able to live on. I knew logically there was nothing I could have done to stop either Laurent, or whoever killed Dr. Stanley, from making the choices they did. But still, seventeen bright lights were now extinguished, and my heart broke with the senselessness of it all, and I cried with Edward, holding him to me. I continued to try to convince myself I wasn’t at fault, but the longer I stayed around this hospital, watching the tragedies unfold, hearing the cries of the injured children, looking into the faces of the grieving families, how could I hold myself completely blameless? I had to try harder, for Edward.

“I’m sorry, I’ll come back later,” a voice said behind us. I released Edward and we both looked to find a very apologetic hospital chaplain standing in the doorway. “If this is a bad time, I can come back.”

Edward sat up and pulled me into his lap as he motioned for the priest to come in. Father Mallory had looked so happy at our wedding, glad to be helping Edward, who he said had provided him with hours of pleasant, soothing music up in the Sanctuary when he was composing the lullaby for Dorianne’s birthday. The priest looked tired and drawn now, no doubt from all his ministrations to the crash victims and their families. His eyes lacked the sparkle they had at our wedding, and I could only imagine how seeing so many dead children had drained the light from them. When he looked at me, my heart broke with the sadness and anger there. I knew how he felt. I was angry, too, with myself, and I had only had to deal with the living. He had spent hours giving last rites and making burial arrangements with the families, all because of a senseless, selfish act.

“We’re glad you’re here, Father, we’re just so sorry it’s under such sad circumstances,” Edward said to him, motioning for him to sit. “Thank you for coming so quickly to check on Bella. It means a lot to me.”

The priest smiled warmly at me, but the warmth wasn’t reflected in his eyes. “You know I wouldn’t neglect my friends, especially at times like these. Bella, I understand you knew the jumper. Please, don’t blame yourself for what he did.”

I couldn’t help the tears that started escaping my eyes. “I can’t help it, Father. I think he was following me, and maybe was obsessed with me or something. I just don’t know. If he jumped because I got married, then maybe it was because of me…”

“Bella, dear, I know how gentle people like you are. You’ll keep internalizing this until it makes you ill. Please, let me help you through this. Come up to my office. I also provide grief counseling, and I’m sure we can work through these feelings of guilt. Edward, you’ve been a good friend to me, and I would be honored to do it free of charge.”

Edward looked into my eyes, and then asked, “Do you need us both to come?”

“I think it would be best to start with Bella. First sessions are usually best one on one so there’s no fear of saying anything that might be difficult in front of each other, similar to confession, if you will.”

Father Mallory got up, shaking Edward’s hand. “I look forward to our session, Bella. I’m sure I’ll be able to help you see the light of your true roll here.”

I was sobbing again, and Edward wrapped his arms around me, rocking me while I wept. Father Mallory clapped his hand on Edward’s shoulder as he left. I lay back with Edward and he brought the blankets up over us. Both of us exhausted, we fell into a restless sleep in each other’s arms, our tears mingling as our faces pressed together.

The setting sun shining in through the blinds woke me, and I arose to find Edward gone, a note on the table by the bed.

Bella,

Gone to do my rounds, be back soon.

Love you and miss you already,

Edward

I sat up and stretched, remembering why I always hated stays in the hospital as my back cracked and my stiff shoulders ached. I found my purse and a washcloth, and made my way into the bathroom to try and freshen up before inflicting myself on the general population. Thankfully, I had my trusty travel bottle of deodorant body spray and toothbrush with me for just such occasions. Thank you, Alice. A few passes with a hairbrush and a spot of makeup later, and I actually was beginning to look human again.

I came out of the bathroom to find Edward sitting in the chair by the bed, deep in thought. He looked up at me and tried to smile, but I could tell in his eyes something wasn’t right. He pulled me into his lap and wrapped his arms around me, burying his face in my chest.

“We lost another one last hour,” he said heavily. “Her parents are down the hall waiting for their clergyman. They donated her organs, what was left of them.”

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered, tears streaming down my face again. We sat together for a while until we both composed ourselves before heading out of the room. We found the girl’s parents, broken and still in shock, sitting in the waiting area. I immediately went to the mother and pulled her into a hug even though I didn’t know her. She willingly hugged me back, unleashing the tears she hadn’t been able to shed yet. I looked over at Edward, and he was in a similar position with the girl’s father as the man sobbed loudly in Edward’s arms.

“We had her so young,” the mother said. “We were only sixteen when she was born, but she was the center of our world from the moment we saw her tiny face. I don’t know what I’ll do without her. She was so looking forward any day now to this baby sister.” I looked down to see her rubbing her very distended abdomen, obviously several months pregnant.

“She won’t be far,” I reassured her through my tears. “I believe it’s like they’re just around a corner; just out of sight, but close enough that we can still feel them and hear them. She will always be with you in your heart, and this little girl,” I said as I placed my hand on her stomach, “Will have a big sister watching over her, I’m sure of it.”

“I believe you,” she said. “Amelia used to lay her hands on my belly, and Deanna would always start moving at her sister’s touch. I felt her hands on me again just before you came in, and Deanna was kicking like a cheerleader,” she giggled through her tears. “I’m Amy Copeland, by the way, and my husband is David.” I introduced myself and Edward, and promised to check on her later. Their minister came in, so we left them to visit with him and headed out so Edward could sign out and we could finally go home, after two days.

Renee and Charlie met us at the door with hugs and kisses as we rushed into the house. It was still bitterly cold, and Edward had given me his coat, so we were freezing by the time we made it inside. Renee ushered us into the living room where I snuggled up with Edward under a blanket while Renee went to make hot chocolate and get some of the left over wedding cake. Charlie had been watching one of the local news broadcasts, when a story about the accident came on.

“…Funeral services are pending following further investigation into the death of Laurent Dubois, the man allegedly responsible for the accident Sunday night that claimed the lives of sixteen children…”

I closed my eyes and buried my face in Edward’s chest as he held me to him tightly, the reporter continuing to explain about what happened during the accident in graphic detail.

“…Sources say Dubois committed suicide by jumping off an overpass into the path of an oncoming school bus due to emotional distress over an unrequited love interest. Victoria Dubois, the sister of the deceased, had this to say…”

I listened painfully as the red haired woman described Laurent’s obsession with someone whose new relationship sent him into a spiral of unfathomable depression. She looked so sad describing how broken her family and his fiancé were over the tragedy and the loss of so many other lives.

“…None of us had any idea he felt that way until this happened. For all we knew, he was happy…”

I had stopped listening. It was all too much, and all I wanted to do was take a shower and go to bed. Edward got up and picked me up, carrying me upstairs to our bedroom. I was so drained, I barely remember Edward laying me down on the bed before I was out.

My night was filled with images of children’s faces and the sounds of screams and crying I had heard in the corridors of the hospital, making for a very restless and tiring sleep. I awoke, in nothing but my panties, to the smell of food cooking, and realized by the angle of the sun coming in through the curtains that it must be at least noon, or later. I jumped up in a panic, racing into the bathroom to get ready for work. I was so late, and I wondered why no one woke me up. I scrambled through a shower and came back into the bedroom to find Edward placing a tray of food on the table next to the bed.

“Why didn’t you wake me?” I asked Edward as he stood there grinning at me. I had left my towel in the bathroom and was standing there frantically trying to run a comb through my hair, totally nude. He adjusted himself before going to his dresser and pulling out one of his shirts.

“I didn’t wake you because I already talked to Rose and you’re out on a personal day today,” he said as he came to me and slipped one of his long tank tops over my head before he wrapped his arms around me, burying his face in my hair and inhaling deeply. “You tossed and turned all night, not to mention the talking,” he teased, but his face was concerned when I turned around.

“What did I say?” I asked horrified that I might have said something to upset him by the look on his face.

“You’re still blaming yourself, Bella,” he said, pulling me tighter into his chest. “You have to let it go. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I know that, but I can’t help it. All those people…” I started but he shushed me and scooped me up, sitting me against the headboard and pulling the covers up to my waist. He sat the tray of food on my lap and kissed my cheek. He had already been up early and at the hospital to check on his patients and had run home to check on me. How I deserved this man I will never know.

“I ran into Father Mallory again this morning, and he offered to see you as soon as you’re up to it.” Edward had a serious look on his face, and I figured he really wanted me to see the priest, so I agreed to call him before the week was out and set up a time.

I was fully awake after Edward left, so I finished eating, got up and threw on my robe and headed downstairs. I could hear Charlie giggling hysterically from the living room, and poked my head around the corner discretely to see what was so funny. Charlie had one of the feather cat toys and had both cats practically doing back flips trying to catch the feather bird he swung tantalizingly over their heads. He heard me snickering and looked up with a huge grin on his face. “If I had known they were this much fun, I would have had a couple of cats while you were growing up.”

“It’s never too late, you know,” I teased him, and then remembered my dream from earlier. Two kittens. Dr. Stanley had said she needed to feed her kittens. I couldn’t help the overwhelming feeling of responsibility I felt towards her beloved little ones. Surely the police had been to her condo by now and discovered them. I rummaged through my purse and called the number on the card the detective had given me in case I thought of anything or had any questions. She told me the kittens had indeed been removed from the condo and since Dr. Stanley had no family in the immediate area, the kittens were being held at the animal shelter. I asked if it would be possible for me to care for them until their fate had been determined, and she gave me the number for the shelter and the name of the person to speak with to arrange it. After the call, I threw on some clothes and headed out the door.

Two hours later, I returned with a pair of the fuzziest, cutest little balls of fur imaginable, a black male and a white female. Tristan and Penelope. I handed them to Charlie, who looked at me like I was insane.

“I was only joking, Bella!” Charlie groaned at me with huge eyes. I grinned at him, and then went into the kitchen to mix two tiny bottles of kitten formula.

“They’re only about five weeks old but they’re very tiny and underweight, dad, and they still need a bottle,” I told him as I handed him one of the bottles and took Tristan. We sat down in the living room and both giggled as the kittens made quick work of the formula. “These were Dr. Stanley’s pets, and the lady she had helping her couldn’t take them home with her because she already had so many of her own, and they didn’t have anyone else to take them, so I did. I just couldn’t abandon them.”

“You always were a softy, Bella,” Charlie grinned at me while Penelope curled up on his chest and fell fast asleep. He gently stroked her tiny back with two fingers while humming to her softly. The purr that began to emanate from her could be heard all over the room, and I wondered how something so tiny could produce that much sound.

“Look who’s talking,” I teased. I watched with careful eyes as Sebastian and Felicity came sauntering into the room, their noses in the air. I hadn’t given a thought to how they would react to two tiny intruders into their territory and feared they might start showing aggression, or worse, bad habits. Sebastian jumped up and lay down in the chair across from me, eyeing the kitten sleeping on my lap. However, Felicity jumped up on the sofa and walked up to me, sniffing his foot. I was poised and ready to shoo her away if she started anything, but she simply started licking his head! My cat was as big a softy as I was.

Felicity spent the rest of the afternoon “mothering” both kittens, licking them from head to toe and allowing them to nuzzle her belly. It took a while for Sebastian to come around, but by the time Edward came home, he and Felicity were in their huge basket together with the two kittens sound asleep between them.

“When did that happen?” Edward asked amused as he noticed the sudden increase in our family size. “Last I knew they were both fixed.”

“They were Dr. Stanley’s,” I told him as I wrapped my arms around him, “They were at the shelter, and I just couldn’t leave them there…” Edward grinned and grabbed me up in a big hug and a long passionate kiss before leaning down over the basket and stroking the two little ones. They stretched lazily and Felicity began cleaning them all over again.

“Can we keep them?” he asked picking up Tristan and nuzzling the back of the kitten’s neck with his nose. He was a bigger sucker for a furry face than I was, apparently.

“At least until everything’s settled with her affairs. As far as we know, no one has a claim on them.” Edward settled into the recliner, playing with Tristan with his tie while talking sports scores with Charlie. I laughed at my two favorite men and headed into the kitchen to help Renee with dinner.

“No, you’re not sending those home with us,” she muttered while peeling a cucumber. She sounded dead serious, but the grin threatening to burst onto her face told me she would be putty in Charlie’s hands if he gave her his begging puppy eyes.

“I think you guys are just going to have to stay here so we can avoid the fight between dad and Edward over them.” She looked over at me and we both broke out into giggles. Renee got quiet for a moment, and then looked at me very seriously.

“Bella, are you ok? Edward told me some of what’s been going on and I’m worried about you. I know how you are, and this kind of thing isn’t something you just get over.”

My mom did know me well. I was trying my best to put on a brave and cheerful face, but inside, I was a mess and she could see it. “I’m going to see Father Mallory one day this week to talk about it. He also does counseling and I think Edward really wants me to go. Who knows, maybe it will do some good.”

I looked over at Renee and she was deep in thought, a small smile playing at the corner of her lips. “Father Mallory, Father Mallory… Why does that name sound familiar?” she half asked herself.

“He was the one who officiated the wedding, mom,” I told her.

“That’s right. He was wonderful. You really should go talk to him, Bella. I’m sure he can help.”

We served dinner, bringing out Grammy’s beloved TV trays and setting up in the living room. Edward and I cleaned up after dinner and snuggled up together in the recliner to watch TV with Renee and Charlie. When the news came on and they started talking about the bus crash again, Edward grabbed the remote to change the channel, but I stopped him because something caught my attention.

“…Investigators say there is now suspicion of foul play. Blood found on the bridge and signs of a possible struggle have the police investigating a new angle into the death of Laurent Dubois…”

“Murder…?” I muttered. Not another one. Oh god, not someone else. It was bad enough that I thought Laurent killed himself over me. The thought that someone else may have killed him, and Dr. Stanley, because of me was more than my nerves could take. This was deliberate, and whoever did it was still out there and could, probably would, do it again until they got to me.

Edward had been watching for my reaction. He picked me up and ran, knowing that the tremors racking my body were quickly flipping my now full stomach. He knew me well enough by now to see the signs and ran me directly to the bathroom, holding my hair while I lost my dinner. Needing a moment alone, I ushered him out of the bathroom while I brushed my teeth and took a few minutes to pull myself together.

When I came out, Edward led me upstairs and undressed me, slipping me into bed. He quickly undressed and climbed in next to me, pulling me into his warm body. I was still trembling, and he held me, speaking softly while I calmed down.

“Bella, we really don’t even know for certain if either one of these deaths has anything to do with you now. Please, love, try to relax a little bit before you come totally undone.”

How could they not be related to me? Every fiber of my being told me this was somehow related to me and both deaths were on my hands. I looked up into Edward’s troubled face and realized my actions were worrying him and making him anxious as well. This wasn’t fair, and I determined right then not to do this to him anymore. I took a deep breath and smiled up at him reassuringly.

“I know, and I promise to try not to lose it every time I hear something about this whole mess from now on. I think talking to someone may be a good idea after all.” I knew it was me, nothing had changed, but I also knew I was strong enough to hold it together in front of Edward and not do this to him. It was my problem and I would deal with it, on my own. I owed him that much, and so much more, so I decided a distraction for both of us was in order.

I began trailing little kisses across his beautiful chest and up his neck before finding his warm lips, hoping he could feel my love for him. I realized we had been married for almost a week and had spent only one night making love. I suddenly felt the urge to remedy that situation.

Edward

Carlisle had said to let her sleep, let her mind have a chance to protect itself. I wanted desperately to wake her, to make sure she was alright, but I knew he was right. I was worried about her overall mental state, so before she could wake up I briefly left her in Carlisle’s care and slipped out to call on my friend, Father Mallory, from the hospital’s Sanctuary, for his counsel.

“Father Mallory, I’m so glad you could see me.” I shook his hand as he led me into his office and offered me a seat. I explained to him what happened with Bella and was anticipating her waking any time and wanted to hurry back to be with her.

“I’m honored you came to me, Edward. You know I consider you a good friend and will do whatever I can to help. Now, tell me what’s going on that has you so distraught.”

I recounted everything that had happened so far, and expressed my worries over Bella. “She keeps blaming herself for everything, Father. But she had nothing to do with any of this.” We talked for a while longer and Father Mallory agreed to see Bella if she would see him.

“I’ll stop by later and talk to her. Hopefully we can get her to agree to come talk with me. She’s a very special person, Edward. You’re a lucky man to have found her.”

“I know, Father, and it’s tearing me up to see her so upset. Thank you for being there for the both of us. If you like, she should be awake in a while, and I’m sure she would like to speak with you.”

I came back to find Bella still out. Carlisle patted my shoulder reassuringly. “She’s been getting more and more restless, so she should be coming around any time, Edward. Call me if you need anything.”

After Carlisle left, I sat down in the chair next to her bed, and at some point must have dozed off. I was awakened by the sounds of Bella’s sobs and rushed to her side, holding her in my arms to try to calm her down. Father Mallory did stop by, and Bella agreed to speak with him, if not somewhat begrudgingly. I was certain she would feel better after talking with him and was grateful for his concern and offers of help.

The rest of the morning was very emotional for both of us, and I managed to get Bella to go back to sleep for a while. I was just slipping out to go on rounds when Alice and Rose met me in the corridor. “Edward, do you have a minute?” Alice and Rose asked very quietly. “How is she? We were worried and came to check on her,” Alice hugged me while Rose patted my arm.

“She’s asleep. Carlisle says she’s fine physically, but I’m worried about her, guys.” I filled them in on everything, and they both were concerned for Bella as well.

“I know how she thinks, and this is going to be rough on her,” Alice said, her brow furrowed. “She thinks nobody knows or hears her crying at the office, but I do, and she takes things to heart like no one I’ve ever seen. I suppose that’s what makes her so good at what she does; she gives all she has, and sometimes it’s more than she can spare, but I know she wouldn’t have it any other way.”

They both slipped into the room and kissed her cheeks, then left quietly. Rose assured me that Bella was to take whatever time she needed from work to deal with everything that had happened, for which I was grateful.

I was paged to the ICU on an emergency code, and arrived to find that one of the children I had pieced back together had lost her fight. She was a beautiful child, tiny for her age, and from what I had heard from the nurses who talked to her family, was a promising clarinet and piano prodigy. To say I was heartbroken would be the understatement of the century, even though I knew her chances were slim due to the extent of her injuries. I knew I needed to speak to her parents, but I just couldn’t do it, not alone.

I made it back to the room where Bella was and found her bed empty. I could hear the water running in the bathroom, and sat down to wait for her. We pulled ourselves together and went down to find the child’s parents. Bella sat, talking to them and holding both their hands like we had known them forever. Even through what she had already endured herself, this amazing woman I was lucky enough to call my wife ministered to these people like she was a rock in a storm, which they both seemed to feel and leaned on her. I watched her in total awe, falling even deeper in love with her.

Once their clergyman came, I checked out and we finally headed home. After more than two days of almost nonstop chaos, I was ready to drop, and I knew Bella couldn’t take much more.

We finally made it home and spent a short while watching TV with Renee and Charlie. However, the news story about Dubois again sent Bella into a tailspin. She flipped over and buried her face in my chest, obviously very upset by the story. I said good night to Charlie and Renee and they watched with worried faces as I carried Bella to bed. Even though she had slept quite a bit during the day, she was mentally exhausted, and I contemplated for a moment making a trip to the all night pharmacy for a sedative for her. However, knowing Bella as well as I did, I knew she wouldn’t take it. I was relieved when I laid her down to see her fall asleep almost immediately. I slipped her clothes off and covered her up, undressing myself and crawling in next to her. I was tired beyond tired, but not long after we lay down, she started talking.

I listened in horror as she claimed to have killed them all and was asking for someone to give her absolution. She was still blaming herself, and I didn’t know how to get through to her that she wasn’t responsible for any of the deaths that had happened over the past few days. She tossed and turned and cried most of the night, and I felt powerless to help her. She finally settled down just before dawn, and I wearily got up and showered and got ready to head for the hospital, hoping she would finally rest.

Charlie was in the kitchen and had just poured a cup of fresh coffee. He handed it to me and pulled another cup from the cabinet, eyeing me in the process.

“You look like hell, Edward. Bad night?” he asked, concern all over his face and in his voice.

“Yeah. Bella had nightmares all night, too. I’m really worried about her, Charlie. I know she has a big heart, but one person can only take so much.”

“She’s tough, Edward. I know she looks fragile, and maybe she’s more so than I think, but I’ve seen her handle some pretty bad stuff. She’ll be ok, just hang in there.”

“Has she ever had to deal with something like this that she felt responsible for?” I watched Charlie’s face fall.

“I guess she never told you about her dog, Pepper?” Charlie asked. I had never heard her mention a dog, so I shook my head and Charlie continued. “I’m not surprised. It’s a pretty painful subject for her.” Charlie sat down, rubbing his hand roughly over his face as he gathered his thoughts.

“Pepper was her baby, a tiny jet black toy Pomeranian. Cutest ball of fuzz you ever saw. She had brought her here to spend the week with her and her grandparents during that summer. She was almost eight, I think. Anyway, she let the dog out in the back yard to go to the bathroom and went back inside to get something, and when she went back out to get the dog, it was gone.” Charlie poured himself another cup of coffee and continued.

“We searched for days. My dad finally found it dead in the backyard next door. Bella was devastated and completely inconsolable, blaming herself for not watching Pepper closer. At first we thought maybe a hawk or a fox got hold of it, but thinking back, that dog was literally mutilated, not ripped like an animal would do. The poor little thing had been tortured and beaten to pieces. Whoever did it was one sick creep with serious anger issues. Dad suspected Laurent Dubois of it. God knows that kid became weirder and weirder over the years, but we could never find any proof. She wanted another dog after that, but was so afraid she wouldn’t be able to watch it properly. The guilt of not protecting Pepper stayed with her for a long time. She totally blamed herself for the dog’s death. Then Felicity just happened, and she gave up on the idea of getting another dog altogether. She seemed to get over it, but I know deep down she carries that guilt with her even today, and not knowing exactly what happened to Pepper haunts her and rekindles that old fear occasionally. I can see it in her eyes every time she looks at a puppy.”

The thought of Bella suffering such a loss caught in my throat. Whoever would do such a thing was obviously sick. “It’s a good thing she’s going to talk to Father Mallory then. I’m sure he can help her work things through.”

“James Mallory?” Charlie asked. I wasn’t sure of the priest’s first name; I had only called him Father.

“I don’t know, but he was the one who married us.” Charlie had a thoughtful look on his face for a moment, and then grinned.

“I was too busy watching Bella to notice too much,” Charlie laughed, “But now it makes sense. I thought he looked familiar. Your wedding wasn’t the first marriage he officiated for Bella.” Charlie went on to tell me that James Mallory was the one who performed the “ceremony” for Laurent and Bella when they were six.

“He was groomed for the priesthood from the time he could walk,” Charlie laughed again. “He was a good kid. He should be able to help her a lot.” Charlie relaxed and I did, too. I headed off to the hospital to make my rounds before the sun had even crested the horizon.

I wanted to check on Bella, so I ran home at lunch, finding Renee busy in the kitchen making a tray for her. I planted a kiss on Renee’s cheek and she hugged me back. I wasn’t looking forward to them going home in a few days, and I hoped Bella and I could convince them to stay, permanently. Having them here had made life so much easier for Bella and I, and I loved them as much as I did my own parents.

“I checked on her about an hour ago and she was still asleep,” Renee said as she finished loading the tray with food. “She really should wake up and eat something, though. She’s getting so thin, I can’t help but worry about her.”

“So do I, mom. I’ll see if I can get her to eat. Thank you for being here right now. You don’t know how much it means to me to have you and Charlie here through all of this. We couldn’t do this without you.” Renee smiled warmly and hugged me tightly.

“I’m glad we’re here, too, Edward. I can’t imagine being away from you two right now. There’s just so much going on that has my baby upset. I know she’s a grown woman, but I still worry about her. She’ll always be my baby, and so will you now. I know she has you, and I’m so glad she does, but it makes her old dad and I feel useful to be here doing anything we can to help.”

“You’ll always be useful, mom,” I smiled at her and kissed her cheek. “And it feels pretty darned nice to be someone’s baby occasionally. I could get used to it, actually.”

I took the tray upstairs, only to find the bed empty and Bella frantically trying to get ready for work. I told her she had the day off as a personal day, and she visibly relaxed. She was standing there with nothing but a hairbrush and it took all the strength I had to slip my shirt on her and put her in the bed without peeling off my own clothes and joining her. We hadn’t had time to be together again since our wedding night, and seeing her beautiful body before me, bare and glistening with the droplets of water from her hair, woke me up, all over.

I teased her about talking in her sleep, but the disturbing things she said last night had me scared out of my wits for her. In her dreams she was trying to bargain for the lives of the people who died with her own, willing to give herself as a sacrifice to keep whoever was killing people from killing someone else she loved if they would take her instead. I shuddered at the thought, but tried to laugh it off a little. I reminded her again about Father Mallory’s offer of help. She agreed to see him, and I was relieved she didn’t argue with me.

I headed back to the hospital again, running into Carlisle in the elevator. He had a huge grin on his face. “It’s a healthy girl,” he announced. “Deanna Isabella Copeland.” I followed him around to the nursery where David Copeland was standing beside a warming table, holding the tiny hand of his new daughter while the nurses cleaned her up and dressed her. He looked up and winked at me, tears streaming down his face. I was sure this was a bittersweet moment for him, and I nodded as Carlisle and I left him with his new miracle.

“How’s Bella?” Carlisle asked. He knew the whole story now and I could tell he was as concerned as the rest of us about her.

“She’s holding her own, but for how much longer, I’m not sure, Carlisle. This whole thing has her in turmoil, and she keeps blaming herself for what happened. How can I convince her she’s not responsible for any of this?”

“You can’t,” he told me. “Something is going to have to happen to make her see that she isn’t responsible. Emotions for people like Bella run to the very core of their being. I can tell she’s very spiritual and internalizes other’s problems. It’s what makes her so special, her ability to empathize so fully. But it also makes her vulnerable sometimes. Stay close to her, Edward. She’s going to need all of us to get through this.”

Emmett came in looking for Carlisle, and pulled me into a huge hug, asking about Bella as well. Carlisle and I brought him up to speed on everything that had been going on.

“Damn, she has to know she didn’t do any of this. I should warn you, Edward. The reporters have been all over this. We’ve managed to keep her name out of anything, but they’re snooping and relentless. Keep her close.”

I laughed, having just heard the same thing from Carlisle. They truly were father and son. “Have you heard anything else about Dubois?”

Emmett shifted a little and looked around to make sure no one was listening. “Yeah, actually. Word is he may not have jumped on his own. There was blood up on the bridge, and they found more shriveled rose petals. The footprints were inconclusive due to the amount of them, but it looks like there may have been a struggle.” My heart fell into my feet. More rose petals, like in the stairwell. “They haven’t gotten the forensics reports back yet, but there’s suspicion now that the deaths of Dubois and Dr. Stanley are related somehow. Keep this under your hats, though, it’s not public knowledge yet.”

Emmett and Carlisle went back to his office to discuss wedding details Esme had asked for, and I went about finishing my day. I couldn’t wait to get home to Bella, and headed out as soon as I could break free.

The first thing I noticed when I walked into the living room was the two tiny extra bumps of fur snuggled in between Felicity and Sebastian. Bella wrapped her arms around me and explained where they came from. I swore I was a dog lover at heart, but having Sebastian and Felicity around had won me over to the cat lover’s side, and I instantly fell in love with them. Charlie eyed me and grinned, knowing that I had caved to my soft side. However, when he picked up the other kitten and started cooing to it, I knew I wasn’t the only one as I grinned back at him.

Renee and Bella set dinner up for us in the living room, and Bella put my food on the tray I had given her for her birthday that looked just like the one I had used in my own grandparents house as a boy. Charlie had become the resident soft touch at dinner, and he was surrounded by cats vying for morsels off his plate. Bella just shook her head and laughed. We cleaned up from dinner and decided to spend some time with Renee and Charlie in the living room. No one was really paying much attention to the TV, but the news had come on and a reporter started in on a story about the bus crash. I saw the look on Bella’s face and tried to turn it off, but she stopped me. Apparently, the information Emmett had given me earlier had made its way to the press.

I watched Bella as she listened to the report, recognizing the signs I had seen earlier. I grabbed her and ran with her to the bathroom just in time. This had to stop. She pushed me out of the bathroom for a private moment, and I waited in the hallway for her. When she finally came out, she looked like death warmed over. I led her upstairs and got us both undressed and into bed. I tried one more time to convince her that the whole mess of the last few days was not her fault. I watched as her face changed and recognized her look of determination. She tried to convince me she was going to hold it together from now on, but I knew better. Outwardly, she was going to try to put on a brave face, but I knew my wife, and I knew inside she was going to continue to blame herself. I worried for her as that look of determination settled.

I was determined, too. Determined not to let this misplaced sense of guilt pull her under, and I would do whatever was necessary to protect her. She was my life, and without her, nothing else mattered.

Chapter: 15

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 15 – We All Fall Down

Bella

Black. Even the sound of the word being spoken was like a sound one made in disgust. I always hated wearing black. It made my pale skin look eerily luminescent and almost gothic. However, that’s what funerals usually warranted, so I pulled on the new black dress I bought yesterday during our forced trip to the mall. Alice and Rose had been extremely supportive, almost to the point of patronizing, which led me to believe they had spoken with Edward and Emmett about me. Even Renee and Charlie watched me like I was five again, and Esme and Carlisle had been by twice in the past week. I was humoring them all for now, but this had to stop soon. I wasn’t some fragile child that needed watching over, but I knew their hearts were in the right place, so I played along, for now.

The last two weeks had flown by in a blur. I had my first couple of meetings with Father Mallory, and they went well. We laughed at the location of his office, at the top of the second tower of the hospital, so he could be closer to God, he had teased. It felt good to finally laugh, and I relaxed enough with Father Mallory that I was able to talk about my feelings concerning Laurent Dubois, and the guilt I felt over what happened. Even though I was supposed to go alone, I knew Edward was just down in the Sanctuary waiting for me. Sure enough, when we finished, he would come sweep me up in his arms and hurry me off to lunch, Father Mallory laughing behind us and wishing us a good afternoon. I had been able to put aside much of my guilt over the events of days prior, but still, a part of me held on to the feeling that I had, at least in some small way, a part in the tragedies that ultimately claimed nineteen lives.

Eighteen people died as a direct result of Laurent’s dive off the bridge, but one more life was added to the list three days ago. Laurent’s mother passed away. He was her closest son, and the doctors believed the grief over his death brought on a spiral of depression so severe, she simply gave up and gave herself over to death to be with him. She was cremated, and along with Laurent, they were being memorialized today, and I was determined to go.

“Bella, are you sure you want to do this?” Edward asked as he straightened his tie. I was prepared to go alone, but he insisted on going with me. “You’re doing so well now, I don’t want there to be any setbacks for you.”

“This is important to me, and Father Mallory thinks it will help me with closure, so I really want to go. I’ll be fine, Edward.” I finished dressing and we hurried off to the hospital, where the memorial was being held in the Sanctuary.

There were many more people than I anticipated, and the parking lot was filling rapidly. Police were everywhere, keeping the press and the curious at bay, as the family had requested a private service, closed to the general public. As Edward and I passed through the crowd, a reporter grabbed my arm and spun me around, shouting in my face while his cameraman snapped photos of my shocked expression.

“Mrs. Masen, is it true that you’re the person Dubois killed himself over?” a rude, ruddy faced little weasel of a man screeched at me. Edward was at my side and had the man’s hand immediately disengaged from my arm and twisted up behind his back before he knew what hit him.

“Touch my wife again and I’ll have you arrested for assault,” Edward hissed at him, fury in his eyes and venom in his voice. Fortunately, one of the police running security saw the whole exchange and dragged the reporter away before Edward could make it necessary for him to need to stay at the hospital. Edward wrapped his arms around me and shielded me from any further media assaults as we made our way past the frenzy.

“How did they even know who I was?” I whimpered as we made our way to the elevators. “As far as I know, no one knew anything about Laurent’s obsession with me but his family.”

“I don’t know,” Edward said, “But I suspect he won’t be the last of them now, at least until the investigation is finalized.”

It was very useful having a friend who was close to several of the investigators on the case. Emmett had learned that homicide was now suspected since the forensics reports had come back on Laurent and indicated signs of pre-death trauma and struggle. However, they were no closer to having any leads on a killer, so everything was still being kept under wraps until more was known. There was some evidence that was still being analyzed, but nothing definitive had been determined, and nothing had officially been released to the press as of yet.

We entered the Sanctuary, passing by the line of family who were receiving condolences from attendees as they entered. I recognized the red haired woman as Laurent’s sister, Victoria, from the newscast the other night. As Edward and I filed past, she looked at me and practically growled, “What are you doing here?”

I was taken aback by her animosity, especially in this place, at this time. Edward stepped protectively between us as she moved toward me, her red hot anger flaring almost as vividly as her blazing locks.

“Victoria, don’t…” another woman came beside her and pulled her back. Edward relaxed, only slightly, as the woman held onto Victoria’s arm. I recognized her as well from the newscast.

“I’m Jane Mallory, I was Laurent’s fiancée. Thank you for coming,” she said trying to sound warmer than she looked. She extended her hand to shake mine and when our hands touched, it was like dipping my hand into liquid nitrogen. I felt an immediate dead coldness that went all the way to my core. Her face was familiar to me outside of the broadcast, and I wanted to look at her longer to try to figure out where I knew her from, but it was uncomfortable because I felt as if I were looking at something – otherworldly. Jane noticed my expression and smiled, which served to unnerve me even further. “You probably don’t remember me, but I remember you. I’m Father Mallory’s little sister. I use to watch you and James playing with Laurent when we were small.”

I nodded as I vaguely remembered them. He always seemed annoyed, and she used to sit on the porch and glare at me as James, Laurent, and I would play baseball in the front yard. She was a year younger than me, but she was too girly to get dirty, very unlike the tomboy I was. She always had her dolls in tow, getting angry and frustrated when Laurent refused to play ‘house’ with her because he wanted to play with me instead. I felt a shiver go up my spine that unnerved me beyond words as I glanced back at her. She still had that same look on her face.

Edward pulled me away and led me to a pew towards the middle of the Sanctuary. As we sat waiting for the service to start, I looked around, mesmerized by the beautiful colors that played across the walls like a kaleidoscope. The center of the ceiling was made of an amazing huge domed stained glass mural. The Sanctuary was at the very top of the center tower of the hospital, which was slightly recessed between the other two mirrored glass towers. This allowed the sunlight to bounce off the two taller towers and be reflected down through the dome and be cast around the room in multicolored dancing patterns. The colorful stained glass formed a pattern in the image of Christ with several children surrounding him. It was breathtaking.

Father Mallory came to the pulpit and raised his hands to silence the crowd before cueing the choir to begin singing the opening hymn. He offered an invocation and then began to speak, reading off the standard particulars of the deceased. His eyes connected with mine briefly before he began the body of the eulogy.

“Laurent Dubois was the beloved son of Annette Dubois, who we also remember today. A gentle soul, Laurent was loved by many, misunderstood by many more. From the time Laurent was small, he proved that his ability to love unconditionally would last throughout his lifetime, however short. He was devoted to his heart’s desires, giving all he was, even in the end. He will be remembered in many ways by those who knew him, as a private person who spent his entire lifetime searching and hoping for things just out of reach, a dreamer, if you will, endearing him even more to those who loved him most.”

All through the eulogy, Father Mallory continued to glance at me as if he was having a hard time focusing. As he finished, I caught the glimmer of a single tear that rolled down his cheek as he left the pulpit. My heart broke for him for this portion of his calling. He had seen more than his share of funerals these past few weeks, and I was in awe of him for being able to hold himself together in the face of all the tragedies to which he had ministered.

Each of the family members took a few minutes to speak about Laurent through tears and sobs. Laurent’s older brother, Felix, stood at the pulpit for a few minutes trying to collect himself enough to say something, but eventually just said, “I love you both. Rest well.”

A memorial table had been set up near the front of the Sanctuary with the urns containing the cremated remains of Laurent and his mother. As the family members gathered in front of it for last hugs and goodbyes, they each walked away, leaving a single flower on the table in front of the urns. They moved to the back of the Sanctuary, and then Father Mallory invited any who wanted to pay their respects before joining the family to come forward.

Everyone filed past the memorial, some leaving flowers, a few others leaving envelopes for the family. As we filed past the table, Father Mallory smiled sadly down at me. He looked tired and troubled. The urns were beautiful and ornate, but what caught my attention was an unexpected flash of color as I passed. All the flowers that were left around the table were an assortment of whites; carnations, mums and calla lilies. Except for one, a pink rose.

Edward motioned to Father Mallory and whispered something to him. He nodded and Edward followed, motioning me to join them. We quietly exited the Sanctuary through a door behind the pulpit backdrop, entering a darkened stairwell. I froze and immediately turned to run, but Edward wrapped his arm securely around my waist and pulled me forward with him, letting me know he was there and nothing would harm me in his presence.

“This leads to the private corridor to my office. You’ll be able to get out this way without encountering the press or the family. I’m sorry for how they behaved when you arrived. Please forgive them, especially my little sister, Jane. They’re understandably distraught at this time,” Father Mallory tried to comfort me as we made our way out into a back hallway and into a private elevator. “I apologize for the slowness of this old elevator. It’s rarely used by anyone but myself, so the hospital never bothers to update it. However, you’ll be safe from the press and no one will know you’ve left. Take care, my children.”

“Thank you, Father,” Edward smiled as he shook hands with the priest. “You’ve been most helpful and we owe you so much.”

“It’s my sacred duty to help those who come to me. But it’s also been my pleasure to help friends,” he said warmly as hugged us both and saw us into the elevator. “I’ll see you next week, Bella.”

I waved goodbye to him as the elevator closed. Edward wrapped me into his warm arms and rested his cheek on my head as we rode slowly down in silence. Despite the assault by the reporter and the encounter with Laurent’s family, I was glad I came. It did provide me with the closure I needed, and I felt more at peace than I had in days. Somehow I felt that Laurent was there, and that he held no malice towards me. If anything, I felt his love for me. My biggest regret was that he never talked to me so maybe we could have become friends again and avoided all of this.

Edward and I pulled our coats up around us as we exited out a side door and headed for the parking garage, hurrying to avoid the attention of the throng of press camped outside the entrance of the hospital. As we crossed the emergency entrance drive, the sound of squealing tires pierced the quiet. I was suddenly flying backwards in Edward’s arms as a small black car with heavily tinted windows flew past. We landed with a bone crunching thud against a pylon, me landing on top of Edward. It was over so fast I didn’t have time to know what was happening, much less scream. However, that’s exactly what I did when I looked down to see the pool of blood forming around Edward’s head.

“EDWARD!” I screamed again, afraid to move him or even touch him. The sound of my screams brought people running from all directions. Someone ran into the emergency entrance and we were quickly surrounded by doctors and nurses. Two of the nurses held me out of the way while the doctors examined Edward to determine the extent of his injuries. An ambulance pulled up moments later and Edward was loaded onto a stretcher and into the ambulance.

“They’re taking him to Valley; they’ll be better able to care for him there,” one of the doctors told me as he helped me into the ambulance. I watched as the EMT’s worked on Edward, forgetting to breathe most of the time myself. It only took a few minutes to get to Valley, but Emmett was waiting outside the emergency doors when we pulled up.

“Bella, what happened?” Emmett asked pulling me into his arms and following behind the EMT’s as they quickly moved Edward inside.

“I don’t know, Emmett. We were leaving Laurent’s memorial service, and the next thing I knew we were on the ground. I think someone tried to hit us with a car.” Emmett grabbed his cell phone and called detective Miller, who had been working Dr. Stanley’s case. I watched helplessly as the doctors worked on Edward. He was unconscious and they were still trying to stop the bleeding. I prayed hard as I stood there, my heart in my throat. Why would anyone try to run us down? The old familiar feelings came crashing down on me again as I realized why. Me. Again.

“Bella, are you okay?” Emmett’s voice whispered in my ear. I hadn’t even realized my knees had buckled. I moved to get up quickly and immediately threw up. Emmett was fast and dodged it, but I made a mess none the less. Emmett just stepped around it and summoned a nurse, who called for an orderly after covering the mess with a disposable drape. Emmett led me to another area where he sat me down and got me some water.

“Bella, they’ve taken him to x-ray just to make sure, but the doctor believes he’ll be fine, he just got knocked out and split his scalp open and he has a mild concussion. He’s going to have an ugly haircut for a while, and a bitch of a headache, but he’s okay,” Emmett tried to reassure me.

I sobbed in relief into Emmett’s chest. I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned to find the detective waiting to speak with me. “Mrs. Masen, I need you to tell me anything you can remember.”

I told her I didn’t see much, but gave her a description of the car as best I could. “It all happened so fast. We were so busy just trying to avoid getting attacked by reporters again that I didn’t pay attention to anything.” I told her about the reporter ambushing me, but other than that, there wasn’t much I could add. I felt helpless that I couldn’t provide more information, and stupid for not being more observant given the recent events.

The doctor came to speak to me before taking me to Edward. The x-rays confirmed it was a slight concussion and he would be fine. As I walked in, Edward was propped up, looking rather precarious, but better than I had seen him earlier. He held his arms out to me and I quickly climbed up beside him and wrapped myself around him.

“I thought I lost you there for a bit,” I whispered into his ear as he pulled me closer. I tried to choke back the sobs, but the emotions and relief finally got the better of me, and the dam burst.

“I’m just happy you’re safe, love,” Edward whispered into my hair. I looked up into his beautiful green eyes and he had a confused look on his face as if he were trying to remember something.

“What are you thinking?” I asked as I lay my head back down on his shoulder. He chuckled softly, pulling me closer against him.

“It’s funny the things you think you see when you’re facing death head on,” he said, kissing my head. I wanted to press further for an explanation, but he had gently drifted off to sleep before I could ask him anything else.

They kept Edward overnight for observation as a precaution. I awoke the next morning laying next to him. I got out of bed to go to the bathroom but slumped back, bumping hard into the side of the bed as my eyes trained on what lay on the table next to the bed – a crushed pink rose. Except for nurses coming and going in the night on regular rounds, I heard no other sounds in the room, nor did I hear the door opening. My jarring the bed woke Edward, and he looked at me, following my panicked gaze towards the side table to see the mangled flower. He immediately grabbed the phone and called Emmett, then pushed the nurse’s call button and requested hospital security.

This routine was starting to wear thin, on Edward as well as myself. After an exhaustive search of the hospital, just like at Children’s, nothing unusual was found, even on the surveillance footage. While Edward answered questions from the detective, my mind wandered back to the previous day at the funeral. Whoever left the rose had to have been at the funeral. I tried to remember faces and people I had seen there, but with everything else that had happened, my mind was a muddled blank. With my memory so questionable at this point, I wasn’t even sure I was remembering everything correctly, but I was certain about one thing: someone wanted me dead.

Edward was finally released the next day and we both were anxious to get home. We arrived to find a police car parked across the street from the house. The officers got out and met us on the sidewalk.

“Welcome home, Mr. and Mrs. Masen,” the taller of the two officers greeted us. “We’re friends of Emmett’s and are here to make sure you’re safe.” Edward and I both shook their hands and invited them inside out of the cold. Renee brought coffee and some cookies and we sat down with them to talk.

“We’re actually off duty,” Officer Quil said. “But any friends of Emmett are friends of ours, so we’re going to be taking turns providing protection until we catch whoever is stupid enough to mess with you guys.” I started to protest, but he shot his hand up to stop me.

“Look, it’s our pleasure. Besides, none of us on the force want to deal with what Emmett would be like if anything happened to either of you,” he said with a laugh. Knowing Emmett, I didn’t blame him.

The next few weeks dragged on as if time were trying to stand still just to torment me. My sessions with Father Mallory had been the only saving grace in the beginning. Nothing else happened and all seemed quiet, for now. I couldn’t help but feel that this was the calm before the storm, however. Usually, my instincts were right, but just this one time, I prayed I was wrong.

All the children who survived the bus crash were now out of the hospital, and work had settled back into the familiar pattern of cases and incidents. Fortunately, we hadn’t had anything major in a while, which I was grateful for. I needed a break, both physically and mentally from all the drama.

Charlie and Renee decided to head back to Forks, which affected me more than I ever thought it would. I had come to depend on their calming presence, but Renee reminded me that Edward and I were still newlyweds and needed to start acting like it, which was hard when there was always someone else in the house. Charlie promised me they would visit more often, and agreed to try to get Renee to start downsizing. I wished him good luck with that.

Edward was putting the last of their luggage in the car as Renee and I stood in the living room in a hug I never wanted to break. Charlie came in with Tristan and Penelope in his arms, nuzzling and kissing their tiny heads before setting them down to chase each other up the stairs.

“I think you’re going to miss those two more than me,” I fake pouted as Charlie kissed my cheek and hugged me tightly. “Are you sure you don’t want to take them with you? They’re going to miss all the treats you sneaked them at almost every meal. You have them quite spoiled, you know.”

“I would, but when I came back, Felicity and Sebastian would probably shred my pants legs,” he laughed. “Besides, I feel like I would be breaking apart a perfect set.” We all laughed as we looked up at four sets of shining eyes watching us from between the spindles of the upstairs landing.

As Renee and I headed toward the entryway, Charlie went to hug Edward and pulled something from his jacket pocket and slipped it to Edward. We were too far from them to hear their whispered conversation or see what it was, but Edward and Charlie were suddenly very serious. Edward shook his head, but Charlie leaned in and whispered something else to him, and Edward took whatever it was Charlie gave him and buried it under a messy pile of paperwork he had been doing on the coffee table. I made a mental note to myself to look under there later and see what that was all about. The look on Edward’s face had me very curious and a little worried.

After more tearful goodbyes, we waved as they drove away, Edward’s arms wrapped around my waist from behind. We waved to the officer in the car across the street as we made our way back inside. They had continually rotated shifts of watching over us during their off time, and I was in awe of their dedication to Emmett and to us as his friends. We had even become friends with many of the officers who kept watch over us.

“Well, Mr. Masen, it looks like we have the whole house to ourselves for the first time since our wedding, and no big emergencies at the hospital to attend to at the moment. What do you think we should do to celebrate this momentous occasion on this fine Sunday evening?” I purred into Edward’s ear, eliciting a soft moan from him as I brushed my lips across his neck.

“Well, Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest and worship, so why don’t you lay back and rest while I worship at your alter,” Edward seductively whispered to me as I sat down on the sofa. He knelt down in front of me and started unbuttoning my blouse, holding me captive with his eyes.

We had made love several times since our wedding, but with Renee and Charlie in the house, we were always careful to keep our enthusiasm to a discrete level and always restricted it to our bedroom. Now I felt like a naughty teenager in danger of being caught making out on the sofa by my parents, which only added to the excitement I was feeling. I reached and grabbed the bottom of Edward’s sweatshirt, pulling it over his head, and then made quick work of the button and zipper of his jeans while he did the same with mine. Completely bare, we sat there just looking at each other, grinning like a couple of kids, before I dove into his arms and services began.

A short while later, as we pulled each other close, the sound of applause coming from the doorway caused us both to jerk up and see Jane Mallory walking toward us from the kitchen clapping her hands, the light reflecting off the barrel of the gun she was now pointing directly at Edward’s head.

Chapter: 16

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 16 – All in the family

Bella

Hatred can take many forms. Angry words, physical abuse, even total neglect. However, when it manifests as an entity, still inside the body, but separate, and with a mind of its own, it can be more terrifying than staring the devil himself in the face. By all accounts, that’s what Edward and I were doing right now.

“How did you get in here,” I hissed, still disbelieving that she was here.

“Knowing you were too rude as usual to invite me to play, I let myself in, dear. You know, some of my best friends these days are ex-cons. They taught me everything I know about locks. It’s amazing what desperate men will do for a flash of cleavage. I guess it stands to reason that when your big brother drags you with him while he spends his spare time reforming prisoners something’s bound to rub off. By the way, you really need a better lock on that apartment door,” she laughed, her gun still pointed at Edward. “It was way too easy to pick.”

I tried to reason with her, hoping to focus the aim of that gun away from Edward’s face. “There are officers patrolling right outside the house, Jane. Why would you put yourself in danger like this?”

She grinned evilly at me, “Oh, Bella, you’re worth it! Seeing the two of you die will be the highlight of my day. Besides, your little body guards out there are useless. They never saw me come and they’ll never see me leave. But they’ll probably hear the shots before I go. Besides, skulking around in those damned stairwells with Laurent all that time helped me learn to move without ever being noticed. It’s amazing the tips you can pick up hanging around with the right people. I’m just a regular ninja now.”

She sneered smugly, moving over to get a better look at us. “Get up,” Jane growled, pure bile dripping from her voice as she kept the gun trained on Edward. “That was quite a show, by the way. I hope you enjoyed ‘worshipping’ each other, because it’s the last time you’ll do it in this lifetime. I think it was rather generous of me, waiting until you were finished.”

My stomach lurched as I realized she had been watching us from the time we came back into the living room and saw everything we had just done. I wasn’t sure which emotion was stronger; embarrassment, terror, or rage. As I stared at her, my blood began to boil and rage won out. How dare she!

The fact that Edward and I were still totally nude only made me angrier as she looked him up and down appreciatively before turning her steely glare back to me. She motioned for me to move away from Edward, and then raised the gun up to his head again when I didn’t move. I reluctantly began backing up, while she stepped forward and wrapped her free hand around Edward and began touching him, smirking at me as my face flashed red from rage. The back of my leg caught the edge of the coffee table and I stumbled in true klutz fashion, tipping it with me as I flew backwards gracelessly, landing flat on my bare butt in the middle of the pile of papers Edward had left on the table. My only thought had been to find some way of distracting her long enough for Edward to run and all I managed to do was make her day.

Jane threw her head back and howled with laughter. “Seriously, Edward. You could have done so much better for yourself than this bumbling twit. I don’t know what Laurent ever saw in her. That blonde I dropped in the stairwell at the hospital would have even been better than her.” I was shocked that she would mention killing Dr. Stanley like it was as common as changing socks. “Too bad that wasn’t really you, Bella. I might have even considered letting lover boy here live just to get a proper chance at him.”

She continued moving her hand on Edward, and although he was looking at me with pleading eyes, trying hard to concentrate on me and not reacting to her touch, his body involuntarily gave her what she was obviously looking for as he responded under her hand’s ministrations.

“See what a real woman feels like, Edward,” she purred evilly as she ran the barrel of the pistol up and down the center of his chest while watching me. “Laurent wasted his whole life trailing behind that piece of crap when he could have been concentrating on me and fully enjoying what I was more than willing to give him. What a waste.”

“Why do you want to hurt Edward? He’s done nothing to you! Kill me if you must, but please, don’t hurt him,” I growled through the tears that were spilling down my face from my anger and fear. Edward looked like he wanted to come to me, but Jane pressed the end of the gun firmer into his stomach, effectively stopping him. She finally released him from her repugnant grip, tiring of the game.

“He may not have done anything to me, but you have. You stole Laurent’s love from me, and now his life. Now, you get to watch while the love of your life dies. An eye for an eye.”

I had to think fast and tried try to keep her talking until I could come up with a distraction. “Jane, I had no idea he was even aware I still existed,” I stammered, trying to think of something that would shake her resolve. “Had I know he had feelings for me, that he was even coming anywhere near me, I would have tried to help you get him to see that you were the one he really should be in love with, not me. I would have helped you.” I kept talking, trying to shake her, all the while looking for something, some way, to move her away from Edward. Then I saw it. Peeking out from under the disheveled stack of papers was the edge of the handle of Charlie’s old service revolver. I’d recognize it anywhere because Charlie had taught me a healthy respect for it when I was a kid, and he also taught me how to use it. I grabbed it before Jane even realized I had moved.

It felt as if I were suddenly acting in a scene from The Matrix. The sound of the front door opening startled Jane, who spun around at the same time I screamed at Edward to move and pointed the revolver, dropping Jane where she stood with one shot. But not before she shot first.

Standing in the doorway was Renee, holding her hand over her abdomen as blood trickled through her fingers and splashed onto the wooden floor silently at her feet, her eyes wide with shock.

“RENEE!” Charlie screamed as she fell back into his arms.

Edward

Whoever designed hospital waiting rooms should have to sit in one for endless, restless hours awaiting word on a loved one. Maybe then they’d realize how uncomfortable they were and do something to make them more hospitable. We had been in this room for the better part of the evening and night waiting to find out if Renee would pull through. The fact that she had made it this long was a good sign, at least that’s what I kept telling Bella.

“All she wanted was to get her purse. She left it on the bed. We were going home,” Charlie kept saying, over and over. Bella sat with her arms around him while he rocked back and forth. She glanced up at me with her reddened eyes and my heart ached. This was so unfair.

Father Mallory came into the waiting area and immediately came to me and embraced me. “I’m so sorry, Edward. I know she was my sister, but that doesn’t excuse her actions in my eyes.” He cut me off as I tried to express my regrets about Jane. “She was a tormented soul, and Bella had no choice. God has mercy on the mentally unbalanced, as well as those who defend themselves.” He turned to Bella, “Don’t trouble yourself over this excessively, Bella. I know the taking of a life leaves a heavy burden on the soul, but think how much heavier your heart would be had she killed Edward. Take heart that God requires of us to defend our loved ones. You did nothing wrong in His eyes.”

Father Mallory requested Bella to come to his office later after we had news on Renee. I agreed that she needed to talk about everything that had happened. I could tell by the look in her eyes she was trying to hold it together for Charlie, but the threads holding her together were stretched to the breaking point.

Three hours later, the surgeons emerged from the O-R looking tired and grim. “Mr. Swan?” Charlie barely looked up, and then jumped when he realized it was the doctor.

“Is she…?” Charlie asked, afraid to say the words.

“She’s hanging on, but the next few hours will be critical. The bullet perforated her liver and intestines and lodged next to her spine. We removed it and repaired her internal organs, but it remains to be seen whether she will be able to walk or have feeling below the waist. Only time will tell.” Charlie went back with the doctor to see Renee, leaving me alone with Bella. For the first time since Renee was shot, she broke down.

“Shhh, Bella, I’m here,” I whispered softly into her hair as she clung to me, her racking sobs shaking her violently. Rose, Alice, Emmett, and Jasper came in then and surrounded both of us with hugs and prayed with us. They couldn’t stay, but promised to come back and bring food in a few hours. The officer that was watching the front of the house came in with Emmett, his hat in his hand, looking much worse for wear.

“I’m so sorry, Edward. I had no idea…” I cut him off.

“Please don’t apologize, Allen. You all were the best. She was a master at stealth and treachery. We could have had the house surrounded and she likely would have still gotten in, she was that good at her craft. We don’t fault you guys at all. In fact, we’re very grateful for all the time and effort you devoted to us. We can’t thank you enough,” I reassured him. He nodded silently and hugged Emmett before leaving.

After everyone left, I looked back at Bella, who was sitting in a chair looking very uncomfortable, her eyes closed and head leaned forward as if the weight of the world had settled onto her shoulders. She looked so tired, but I knew she wouldn’t want to leave. However, I knew she wasn’t going to last much longer, so I suggested the only thing I thought might help. “Bella, do you want to go talk to Father Mallory? Maybe it will do you good to get out of here for a bit.” She nodded absently and I called Father Mallory’s office to make sure he was there.

“Of course, Edward, bring her. I’ve been awaiting your call.” I asked if he thought I should be there and he reassured me that Bella would need to talk about what Jane had done to me, and he was certain she wouldn’t open up all the way with me there, which I understood.

Bella was silent the whole ride to Children’s Hospital. I was worried about her overall condition, both physically and mentally. So much drama and trauma had happened in our lives over the past few weeks, not to mention the stress of our jobs, I was afraid she would break any minute. However, as we walked into the hospital, she took a deep breath and squared her shoulders and that look of determination she got when she was under pressure came over her, and melted my heart. She was stronger than any individual I had ever met, and my love for her doubled in that moment as I was reminded just what a remarkable woman she was. And she was mine, which made me all the more proud to be by her side.

We rode the elevator in each other’s arms up to the Sanctuary, were I got out, and Bella continued up to Father Mallory’s office. I needed time alone as well, and right now, nothing felt more right than time at the Sanctuary piano.

The afternoon light was doing its magic through the domed stained glass ceiling as I played, the lights seeming to dance with the music. I took a small break to look around the room, marveling at the beauty of the Sanctuary, when I glimpsed something on the pew behind the sacrament altar, which caught my interest. I got up from the piano and walked over, picking up what appeared to be a journal, a flower stem sticking out from it. As I picked it up a few dried rose petals floated silently to the floor. I opened the cover and read the writing on the first page: Final thoughts of James Mallory.

My first instinct was to lay it back on the altar or on the pulpit, but I heard the words, “Read it,” spoken so clearly, I looked around to see who said them. No one was there. So, I opened the journal and began reading where the stem lay, marking the last entry in the journal, dated today.

Another hand full of dried petals fell to my feet as I began reading, unable to move, helplessly riveted in place as I entered into the secret world of James Mallory:

April 1st,

As I write this, my final entry, my soul seeks absolution. I always knew one day I would do something that would make all my efforts in the priesthood moot on my own behalf. Apparently it’s in my family’s blood. However, since the end of my life as I know it is fast approaching, I feel the need to sit in confession as the convicted, the one in need of absolution instead of the one offering it. I’m certain that, for what I have done, and for what I am about to do, there is no absolution. However, according to even my own convictions and those of much of society, I was damned from birth. I have nothing to lose now, and quite frankly, they deserved it.

Laurent Dubois loved her from the time we were five. At six, I was already playing my part, marrying them in a front porch ‘ceremony’. It was one of the worst days of my young life. I lived two houses down the street from Laurent and we were the same age, so it was fate for us to become close early on. He was always a quiet boy, happy for the most part, unlike me. I was being groomed from a young age for the priesthood, a dream of my mother’s, and I resented it. She seemed to feel that having someone on the ‘inside’ praying for her could get her into Paradise. I suppose, but who will be praying me in after this? It seems a ridiculous notion now.

At six, I didn’t know it wasn’t considered ‘normal’ for me to have the feelings I did towards Laurent, but it felt normal to me and Laurent seemed to enjoy being with me. However, I could see when Bella Swan’s grandmother allowed her to play with us for the first time, Laurent would never be the same with me again. We had played together, just the two of us, since we were in diapers, and suddenly this – girl, was intruding.

We played together for three more years before I got up the nerve to let Laurent know how I felt about him. Bella had been over as usual, the perpetual fifth wheel, and had finally gone home. And then I did it. I kissed him. Laurent wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and said it felt gross and warned me never to do it again. And I never did, until sixteen years later.

Those sixteen years passed agonizingly as I watched Laurent trail after Bella like a love sick fool, becoming more withdrawn and fragile as her grandparents refused more and more to allow her to be around him. It was fine with me that she wasn’t around, but seeing Laurent hurting like that caused the monster of hatred already residing inside me, spawned due to her very existence, to begin to grow.

I tried to stay close to Laurent over the years by offering my love and support disguised in the role of priest and friend, even encouraging Jane to get involved with him, much to my distaste, hoping to distract him from Bella. It didn’t work, and I watched the same monster grow inside my sister as she fell deeper in love with him while he continued to follow and watch Bella every chance he got. He put on a good act and a brave face for Jane, even getting engaged, which only led her in deeper while he tried to live a double life. She became so depressed every time she would catch him in a lie about following Bella again that she ended up spending a lot of time with me during my prison ministry for comfort. I thought her conversations with the inmates were innocent. Had I only known. I never wanted Jane to get hurt. She was my baby sister and I loved her.

Not being able to be with Laurent was torture, but I was able to at least relieve my pent up frustrations with Father O’Brady on occasion. He wasn’t the one I loved, however, and it usually left me feeling guilty, empty and more frustrated emotionally. Every time we were together, all I saw was Laurent’s face. And every time, I cursed Bella Swan to the depths of hell.

When Dr. Edward Masen came into the Sanctuary that day talking animatedly about a new woman he had met and mentioned her name was Bella Swan, I about leapt for joy. Masen obviously was in love with her from the first mention of her name, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before he would be talking marriage. I’d seen and officiated enough premarital counseling sessions to know a man in love when I saw one. Surely this would be the end of Laurent’s obsession with her. I was wrong.

Laurent became more withdrawn and took to stalking her outright. Jane even started going with him occasionally as he followed Bella, unable to get through to him that it was pointless to dwell on her anymore since she was with Masen now. Jane tried her best, growing more frustrated and manic by the day. By the time she came running into my office from the private corridor, covered in blood, I knew she was in trouble in more ways than one. She asked for confessional protection and absolution, and as a priest, I was obligated to keep her confession confidential. I should have tried to have her committed as her brother, but she was my sister and I secretly wished she had been successful. Had she been, things would have turned out so differently. Bella had stolen Laurent’s love from me, and now she has stolen my sister’s immortal soul. Now, my path is set, and I have to do what I know I must.

The last time I saw Laurent was the day of the Masen-Swan wedding. He was standing outside when I pulled up, and it looked like he had been crying. He looked like death warmed over. Jane was with him, looking like she was at her wits end with him. She said she had been trying to talk to him all day in the greenhouse, trying to talk him out of going there at all. It killed me to see him like that, but he was determined to see it for himself. I went in and did what I had to do, praying the whole time Jane would be able to get through to him and get him to leave. However, I saw the look on his face as the happy couple was getting ready to leave. He was devastated. I could see it in his eyes; his soul, his reason for living, was gone, destroyed by Bella Swan. She noticed him, and for a moment, I thought she was going to say something to him; I was hoping for something that would finally release him, but Jane pulled him away before she could say anything to him. If looks could kill, Jane would have left her in a million pieces on that sidewalk that evening.

Part of me died that day, too. To see him like that, knowing he loved her that much, made me angry, at both of them. I always held a small bit of hope in my heart that he could love me, that given a chance I could get him to realize I would be better for him than either Bella or Jane. But his ability to love, to even exist, was gone.

I finally got back to the Sanctuary and called Jane to find out how Laurent was doing. She said he had gone out for a walk, but when she looked, his stuff was gone; he had thrown everything he had at her house in the trash can outside the back door. She was crying. He had left her, and me.

He hadn’t been gone long and he was on foot, so I knew it wouldn’t be hard to find him. It was bitterly cold as I parked my car and set off behind him, running to catch up as the snow swirled around my head. He turned around at the sound of my footsteps, but turned back and continued walking as I came up next to him. I listened to him muttering as he walked, saying how he still loved her and forgave her for marrying someone else and that he would never stop loving her. Nor would he ever love anyone else as long as he lived.

I spun him around to face me and started yelling at him to wake up and realize that others loved him and to forget about damned Bella Swan. He was shaking his head, tears streaming down his face. Then I did it again. For the first time in sixteen years, I did what he told me never to do again. I kissed him. I pulled away and started babbling like a teenager, telling him how much I still loved him and I always had.

He was taken aback and stood there staring at me long and hard before he started laughing in my face. He called me a sick freak and pushed me back, telling me to get out of his face and stay away from him. His words cut me like a knife though my very heart, and something in me snapped. I was sick of being rejected. Sick of watching him fawn over that woman who kept his heart from me and doomed me to a miserable existence alone all these wasted years because I could never bring myself to love someone else. Sick of watching my sister trying to make a life with a man that barely acknowledged her most days. Sick of sex with men I didn’t love just to get by. And most of all, sick of trying to be something I wasn’t, and working for a cause I didn’t even believe in anymore. There was no choice now but to do what I knew was the only way out of the pain for both of us and maybe bring a sliver of justice for everyone I loved.

It was late, cold, and very dark. That stretch of road had no lights, only the slight luminosity of the snow giving any hint of a glow. Laurent was almost a third of the way across the overpass bridge when I caught up with him again. When he turned away from me, the monster inside me took over, eclipsing any form of human reasoning I may have had left. I grabbed him, catching him off guard, and slammed his head into the rail of the overpass. He fell back, but then jumped up and tried to fight. I was driven by emotion filled rage at this point and picked him up, hurling him over the side of the bridge.

The realization of what I had just done hit me instantly, and I sank down on the bridge, but immediately shot up again as the sound of tires squealing and metal ripping tore through the cold, still night, a noise that could only be described as a scream from the demons of hell assaulting my ears. I looked over the side of the bridge in horror as a school bus full of children flipped and rolled off the slick highway, crashing to a violent stop below. I could hear the screams of the children as I ran away into the night. Not only was I a murderer, but I was also a coward. A weak, loathsome, worthless coward.

I had to stop and throw up several times on my way back to my apartment, where I jerked my clothes off and jumped into the freezing shower, trying to wash away the images of the bus rolling, the sounds of the children screaming, and the heat of the sin I felt trying to consume me as I remembered the look on Laurent’s face as he went over the side of the bridge. I couldn’t get the water cold enough to cool the burning I felt, as if the very flames of purgatory were trying to swallow me up.

As I calmed down, I realized three things; my life was over, the love of my life was dead, and Bella Swan was to blame. I had only wanted love, and to protect what was precious to me. It was her fault and she deserved this. So, I pulled myself together, putting on my best priest face and ministered to the families of the children as needed, and bided my time. I offered my help, which Edward, being totally trusting of me from our time together in the Sanctuary, was grateful for. Oh, what a blind, trusting fool. I could tell Bella didn’t trust me at first, but with Edward’s encouragement, I began to counsel with her, building her confidence in me, leading her to me. This would be so easy. I would handle the third problem, and then I could finally be free to go be with Laurent and Jane. May God rest her soul, and may God forgive me. He knows neither of us deserves it.

I was finally back in control of my faculties as I clutched the journal in my hands as raced out of the Sanctuary towards Father Mallory’s office, dialing Emmett as I ran.

I only hoped I wasn’t too late.

Chapter: 17

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Chapter 17 – Salvation

Bella

The last thing I really wanted was to be here, standing outside Father Mallory’s office. I wanted to be back at the hospital with Charlie and Renee, with Edward by my side. I stood there for a moment, taking deep breaths and trying to calm my nerves before knocking. I was grateful for his willingness to see me, despite the fact that I just killed his sister less than twenty four hours earlier. For some reason, that picture wasn’t sitting quite right in the back of my mind, but I was too upset to stand there and analyze it right now. I just wanted to get this over with, so I ignored everything inside me screaming for me to get back to the Sanctuary and Edward.

“Please, come in, Bella,” Father Mallory smiled at me as he motioned me into his office. I sat down in my usual seat, leaning my head back and closing my eyes for a moment while Father Mallory returned to his chair behind the desk. When I opened my eyes, he was still smiling at me.

“Bella, dear. Where to begin…” he said matter-of-factly as he folded his hands on the desk in front of him and looked down at them. “We’ve been on quite a ride together these past few weeks, haven’t we? I’m so sorry about your mother, by the way. I’ve been praying for her ever since I got word of what happened.”

“Thank you, Father,” I muttered, not looking him in the eyes. I suddenly had an even stronger urge to go find Edward that almost pulled me out of my seat. “Father, do you mind if we do this another day? I’m really grateful you were so willing to see me under these circumstances, but right now just doesn’t seem right.”

He looked at me with a puzzled and slightly frustrated expression before smiling again and standing. “Very well, then,” he said softly. “But may I show you something first? I think it will help us both find peace today.”

I nodded again and followed him out into the corridor. As we walked he began humming a hymn I recognized from church when I was little. He smiled down at me as he opened a large metal door and a strong gust of cool wind hit me. We stepped out into the bright sunshine, and I realized as I looked around that we were on the roof.

I was amazed to see that much of the roof area had been either landscaped or was decorated with beautiful statuary, creating a peaceful garden atmosphere. Hundreds of beautiful pink roses were blooming in a small greenhouse at the edge of the layout, their aroma floating heavily in the air where the wind was shielded. I followed Father Mallory to a small gazebo and we sat down, enjoying the mild early spring afternoon after so many weeks of cold, wet weather.

“This is beautiful, Father. I never knew this was here.” It truly was beautiful, not something you would expect to see on the roof of an older building like this.

He smiled as he looked around. “Not many people do. I did this myself, with a little help from Jane. She used to love it up here and came to tend the roses for me when I couldn’t. We spent many hours up here together, especially recently. I guess you could call this our own personal little Garden of Eden. I come here alone when my mind or heart is heavy, and it’s very heavy today. Bella, will you pray with me?” For some reason it seemed an odd request, but he looked so sad at that moment, I just nodded. He was a priest after all, so we prayed.

“Oh, God, thank you for your blessings and for the people in our lives who love us. Please watch over them, please bring peace to our hearts, and forgiveness for our sins, Amen.” It was short, but comforting and to the point. I looked up, but his head was still bowed and he crossed himself slowly before looking up at me with tears in his eyes.

“Come, Bella, there’s something you should see before we depart.” He took my hand and led me to the edge of the building that overlooked the shorter portion of the hospital where the domed roof of the Sanctuary protruded up towards the sky. The view of the stained glass ceiling from this height and angle was spectacular as the sun shown down on it. The colors from the image of Jesus and the children surrounding him reflected off the mirrored glass of the two surrounding towers, creating a swirling pool of colors that were reflected upwards towards the heavens. I couldn’t help gasping in awe at the beauty of the colors, and from a little bit of vertigo as my head spun from the dizzying height. I started to back away from the edge, but I felt Father Mallory’s arm wrap around my waist.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” he asked. “Bella, we’ve been through a lot together, so I wanted to share this with you.”

“Thank you, Father, but do you think we could back up a bit now. I’m feeling a little queasy at the moment. I would hate to ruin your shoes,” I whimpered, pushing us back several large steps.

“You always hated high places, didn’t you? Remember the time we climbed up the rose trellis on the side of your grandmother’s house? You couldn’t take it so Laurent climbed down with you so you wouldn’t be alone and left me there by myself. That hurt my feelings, Bella.” Father Mallory had a very strange look on his face now, and suddenly the memory of exactly how angry he had become that day came rushing back to me. The look in his eyes was the same as that day, and it was scaring me now just as it did so many years ago.

“He always chose you over me, Bella. Well, the least you could do is share this with me now.” I shivered as the look on his face changed to one of pure hatred as he pulled me back toward the railing. The firmness of his grip around my waist tightened as he picked me up and held me against his body, and I looked up to see his expression change in an instant from rage to looking serenely down at me now, the anger all but gone.

“What are we doing, James? Where are you taking me?”

The laugh that came from him made the blood drain from my face. “To hell, my dearest Bella, to hell.” I was dangling in his arms by this time as we moved closer to the rail.

“Put me down, James! Why are you doing this?” I screamed as we approached the guard rail.

“I have nothing left, Bella, and I certainly don’t have anything left to live for anymore. You saw to that yesterday by killing my beloved sister, and I did as well when I killed Laurent. I loved them both, Bella, and we’re going to go meet them so we can apologize and atone for our sins.”

He was insane! I struggled with all my strength to get loose from his grasp, but he had me against the railing and had a strong death grip on me as he climbed up. I fought for all I was worth, and the last thing I did before he swung my legs over the rail was to pray, asking God to forgive him in his insanity and take care of Edward and my family.

Father Mallory jerked around suddenly at the sound of Edward’s voice roaring behind us. He lost his footing, with me in his arms. As we fell, it was if someone grabbed my arms and wrapped them around the railing, where I held on tightly with everything I had in me, and with strength that could have only come from somewhere else, because as Father Mallory slid down my body, I should not have been able to hold on from his weight pulling against the meager strength of my small arms. I clamped my eyes shut tightly as the sound of Father Mallory’s screams echoed off the canyon of the buildings, followed by a thunderous crash as he shattered the Sanctuary the dome below.

If I had had anything on my stomach, Edward and Emmett would have been covered as they pulled me back over the rail. They had to pry my arms loose in order to pull me up. It was a full minute before I could be convinced to open my eyes. Edward’s frightened face was the first thing I saw, and certainly the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. I wrapped myself around him as he carried me away in his arms from the railing, and away from the nightmare that had been our lives for months now. I looked up to heaven and realized, the nightmare was all over. I had finally found my true Sanctuary.

Renee was awake when we got back to the hospital. She slowly winked at me when I came in and I ran to her, burying my face in her hair as I cried in relief. Charlie stood on the other side of the bed, looking exhausted, but smiling.

“They keep tickling my feet, Bella,” Renee whispered weakly as she slightly wiggled her feet under the blankets. Her feet were wiggling. I looked up at Charlie and he nodded and smiled bigger as tears of joy made their way down his cheeks. She wasn’t paralyzed.

God was listening after all.

Edward

I never told Bella what it was I saw the day Father Mallory tried to run us down after Laurent’s funeral. I wasn’t really sure what, or who, it was myself. All I know is they saved our lives that day, and they saved Bella again as James Mallory fell to his death. I suppose some would say it was a guardian angel, others might say it was a ghost or something like that. All I know is, I am indebted to them, and once again, humbled. For most of Bella’s life, she has been in danger of one sort or another. Statistically speaking, she shouldn’t even be alive, yet there she was in front of me, beautiful, well, and glowing. I was now certain without a doubt as I watched her placing pink roses on the graves of Laurent Dubois, Jane Mallory, Father James Mallory, Dr. Stanley, and her grandparents, that she had been carefully guarded her whole life by a force so strong that even the most determined evil couldn’t overcome it, and that force was love.

Bella walked beside me as we made our way to the other side of the cemetery where my parents and grandparents were buried, leaving pink roses for each of them as well. After a while, we walked in comfortable silence back to the car, Bella twirling the last stem in her hand. “We have and extra?” I asked as I looked down into her deep brown eyes.

She shook her head and smiled back at me. “I have one more grave to visit,” she said as she climbed into the car. “Let’s go home.”

Charlie and Renee were sitting on the front porch swing when we pulled up. Bella got out and ran up to them, hugging and kissing them both before taking my hand and leading me through the house and out into the backyard, stopping briefly to kiss four furry heads as we passed the window seat by the back door. We walked to the far corner of the yard where she sat down in the grass in front of a large flat rock and gently laid the rose on it. I sat down next to her, finally understanding.

“Pepper was the answer to a lot of prayers and begging,” she laughed quietly, brushing the tears off her cheeks as they rolled down. “I always felt so guilty about what happened to her. It doesn’t make having lost her any easier, but it does help a little knowing what happened now.” She buried her face in my shoulder as I held her while she mourned her little friend from so long ago.

After Father Mallory’s death, the police went into his apartment, and amongst his personal effects was a set of diaries he had kept from the time he was a young boy. In them he chronicled years worth of thoughts, observations, and commentary. But the main theme of all of them was his obsession with Laurent Dubois, and his escalating loathing of Bella. She never knew. She never had a clue about Dubois or his feelings for her, or that James Mallory was the one who killed her dog, Pepper. He was the consummate actor. There was so much anger and pain in those volumes, much of which Mallory himself admits could have been avoided had he the courage to embrace who he was in this world and live his life for his own happiness. The volumes held laments of an unfulfilled life and obsessive, unrequited love, regrets for not having been true to himself, and of an animosity directed at someone who was carefully guarded by heaven itself.

He never stood a chance.

Bella

We walked back into the house to the sound of laughter as all our friends came in carrying dishes of food and gifts. “Geez, you guys don’t listen, do you?” Edward groaned. He had specifically asked for no birthday gifts, yet here everyone stood, handing him boxes and gift bags. He just shook his head and wrapped his arms around me.

“I have the best gift right here,” he whispered into my ear as he nibbled my lobe, causing me to melt into him with a moan.

“Hey, you two, save that for the honeymoon,” Emmett teased as he swept me out of Edward’s arms for a bear hug.

“Are you two all packed?” Rose asked as she pried me out of Emmett’s arms for a hug. “Did you pack it?” she whispered, grinning wickedly.

“Yeah, I did. And I promise I’ll use it well,” I giggled. The white teddy set and the flavored lotion were tucked into my suitcase, along with a few other treats I had picked up at Frederick’s for our belated honeymoon to Maui.

“I wish I could still get mine on,” Rose giggled as Emmett came up behind her and rubbed her baby belly. “I’m only a little over three months along, and I’m already getting fat! This kid is going to be a linebacker for sure.” Esme giggled behind her and Carlisle just shook his head as he ran his camcorder, capturing the older girls playing in the backyard with silly string while Dorianne was busy blowing bubbles on Mary Noelle’s belly.

“That’s what you get for doing it on your wedding night without protection,” Edward teased, and Rose stuck her tongue out at him. “That, too,” he pointed at her, laughing.

“It serves you right for eloping to Vegas instead of waiting until next month to get married so we could all be there,” Esme grumbled playfully, rubbing Rose’s belly. “Oh well, that just means you can get a head start on number two as soon as this one is born.” Emmett’s eyes were huge, but softened when Rose grinned and winked at him.

“Just look at it this way, Rose,” Alice snickered, “You’ll be able to enjoy the buffet at my reception all the more!” Rose reached out and mussed Alice’s hair as she tried to duck into Jasper’s arms. “Speaking of receptions, Jasper and I have decided to move our wedding up to next month, and we’re just going to have it at our house.”

We all stopped in our tracks and looked at them in shock. “You, Alice Brandon, are having a ‘simple’ wedding?” Rose whispered, wide eyed. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah, fine,” Alice said, but blushed bright red as she looked down while grinning. Jasper was grinning, too, so I knew something was up.

“Ok, you two, out with it. What’s going on?” I demanded.

Alice looked sheepishly at Rose, and then giggled. “Well, at least I’ll still be able to sit on Santa’s knee at Christmas without hurting him too much,” Alice grinned as she and Jasper both rubbed her stomach.

“You, too?” Rose squealed as we both attacked Jasper and Alice with hugs and kisses. “How far along are you?”

“About nine weeks,” Alice said. “Looks like we’re going to be fat together, Rose.” Everyone looked over at Edward and I as if they were expecting something.

“What?” I asked, but I darned well knew what. “Oh, no…”

“Come on, Bella, wouldn’t it be great if all three of us were pregnant together,” Rose and Alice both giggled. Edward wrapped his arms around me and started kissing my neck. Carlisle snickered and turned the camera towards us.

“Yeah, come on, Bella,” Edward whispered seductively at the back of my neck as he peppered soft, wet, warm little kisses there, blowing on them as he went, making me shiver and driving me crazy in the process, and also making it obvious he was having an effect on me from the display in the front of my tank top. “You know, half the fun of it is trying…”

“Stop it, Edward, or these guys will be filming the conception as well as the birth,” I moaned again as he continued to assault my neck in front of everyone. Charlie saved me by dragging Edward outside with him to start the grill. Renee giggled at my predicament and hugged me before heading outside to supervise. She was almost back to normal, but Edward and I were both glad they had agreed to move into the apartment permanently. Our friends had become their friends, and after everything we had all been through, the idea of them going back to Forks and only seeing them on holidays was something none of us were willing to endure ever again. We all agreed that we didn’t want to miss out on any more of the little things that made the Carousel ride so much fun.

Despite all the bad things we had been through, so much good came out of it. We realized how little time we really had here together, and how quickly that time could be cut short. We realized that we didn’t have to share bloodlines with the people we loved in order for them to be family. And most importantly, we learned that love knows no bounds, heals all wounds, overcomes any obstacle, and just about every other clichéd saying imaginable.

But in truth, we all agreed that love is the reason for being; it’s why and how we’re here, to give it and to receive it, and to magnify it in every way possible with as many as we can share it with. It’s bigger than hatred and stronger than evil, and with it, anything is possible.

Almost one year later…

Edward

“You’re doing great, Bella, just a little bit more,” Dr. Stevens said as the second round of crying started. I looked over to see the nurses cleaning off my pink and screaming little girl while another team of nurses moved to the other incubator with my son who had just made his grand and noisy entrance into the world. “Well, Bella, I owe you five bucks,” the doctor chuckled. “You were right on the money, one of each.”

“I told you I had it on good authority, but you wouldn’t believe me,” she laughed back. Epidurals were an amazing thing. The nurses brought the babies over so Bella and I could give them a kiss before they were taken to the nursery for evaluation. Dr. Stevens finished closing Bella’s C-section as I held her hand.

“You were amazing, and they’re absolutely beautiful, love,” I said through my tears.

“They look just like their daddy,” she whispered. “Although Charlie has a bit of his grandpa in him. He’s stubborn.”

Little Charlie was the reason for the C-Section. Everything had been set for a normal delivery of the twins until he decided to flip back over and refused to turn back around. They were both now in incubators being foot printed and cleaned up. Both babies were healthy, over five pounds, and absolutely the most miraculous things I had ever seen, besides their mother.

Bella was cleaned up and taken back to her room, where she was very quickly sound asleep. I kissed her gently and slipped out to tell everyone the good news. Rose and Emmett were finishing up a diaper change with Anthony when I walked into the waiting room, and Alice was leaned back in Jasper’s arms nursing while he read softly to her and Lily Marie. Esme and Carlisle greeted me with a huge arrangement of pink and blue carnations, while Charlie and Renee carried a cluster of pink and blue balloons and two teddy bears.

“We have a healthy boy and girl.” I was grinning like an idiot as I led them to the nursery window. I went inside and cleaned up before coming to the window and holding up my two new little miracles for my family and friends to see. Charles Edward Masen and Allison Rosemarie Masen. The two best souvenirs of our honeymoon trip to Maui we could have brought back.

After everyone left, I slipped into bed next to Bella, who was still sound asleep. I allowed my mind to wander back to the weeks we spent enjoying our honeymoon on a private beach wearing little more than sunblock. We definitely made up for the lack of a proper honeymoon the first time, and remembering some of the things we did on the beach and back at our bungalow made me happy, in more ways than one.

I hadn’t even realized I was moving softly against Bella until I felt her fingers trail firmly over my tightening jeans. I opened my eyes to find her grinning at me mischievously. “You do remember we’re on hiatus for the next six weeks, right?” I felt like a jerk for waking her up like that, but she just leaned over and kissed me slowly, not removing her hand, but continuing what I had started as we stared into each other’s eyes. I was about to come undone just with her well placed gentle touches when the nurse walked in to check on Bella. We both grinned at her and she turned around and walked out, shaking her head and laughing, muttering something to the effect of ‘better enjoy it now’.

“Well, I was,” I muttered with a pout and Bella giggled at me as she removed her hand. “Thanks, Mrs. Masen. I love you.”

“I love you, too, Mr. Masen, and don’t worry. We’ll have time to pick up where we left off when we get home. I’ll make sure of it. You know you’re welcome to come find me anytime,” she whispered through her yawn and smiled sweetly at me, closing her eyes. She needed to rest, so I hummed the song I wrote for her gently until she drifted back to sleep.

I smiled and kissed her forehead softly as I whispered back to her, “I’ll hold you to that, Bella. Forever.”

Chapter: 18

I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!

Epilogue – Circle of Love

“Come on, everyone, we’re going to be late! Let’s go!”

As usual, we were in a hurry. Between our high school senior son, our junior daughter, and the three in elementary school, the back seats of our extended suburban were packed. Five kids at home plus two just out of college and married still kept me hopping. However, I only gave birth to four of them. The youngest three were our current foster kids. Three of dozens who have been through our home. Oh, and the tiny one with the curly auburn hair and blue eyes in the car seat directly behind Edward and I sitting next to his great grandma Renee just recently started trying to call us Papaw and Nanna.

“Do we have everyone?” Edward turned around and did a quick head count. “Ok, seatbelts, everyone. We’re not going far, but we don’t move until everyone’s buckled,” he glared at the two oldest in the far back. “Come on, Carlie and Edrick, we’re going to be late for Alli’s graduation, get ‘em buckled, people.” The two youngest of our natural children took their sweet teenaged time complying with their father’s directed request. I would like to say my two high schoolers were the best example for their foster siblings they could possibly be, but they were typical teens, so that negated that idea.

“Edward, dear, did Anthony remember to leave us Mikey’s diaper bag?”

“I thought Allison left it in the kitchen last night,” Edward muttered as he glanced behind the seats to see if anyone had grabbed it. I remembered my daughter did leave it on the kitchen table when they dropped the baby off for the night, so Edward ran back inside for it. It was a bad idea to be away from home without a change of clothes and fresh diapers when tending a small human volcano. My grandson was known for eating like his grandpa Emmett, and making about as much mess at both ends. Edward returned with the diaper bag, and we were finally off.

Driving down the rainy highway, I smiled at the thought of how many more times we would get to make this trip. Last year it had been to Charlie and Lily’s graduations, only a few months before their wedding. Charlie was now in college with plans for medical school to specialize in pediatric thoracic surgery. Lily decided to follow her parent’s footsteps and was studying in the field of pediatric mental health and development. The next trip had been to Anthony’s graduation where he proposed to Allison in front of over two thousand people in attendance. Of course, being my daughter, she was mortified at the attention, but her love for him was obvious, as it had been since they were small. Honeymoon babies seemed to run in our family, which put Alli’s graduation back a year to have Mikey, but she jumped right back in and finished, with a little babysitting help from all the grandparents. Anthony turned out to be a tall curly haired blonde Adonis with electric blue eyes. He was in high demand as a male model and had a lucrative career as an actor when he wasn’t in front of the fashion camera. Alli worked as his business manager, and sometimes modeled with him, since she got her father’s stunning looks and could stop traffic with a blink. To say we were all proud of all of our first born children would be an understatement.

After dropping off our three youngest charges at Paul and Madelyn’s for a birthday party with their kids and Stephenie’s, we continued on to the graduation. When given the choice between sitting quietly in hard auditorium seating for two hours watching strangers walk across a stage, or spending those two hours at a popular indoor kid’s play restaurant, the mouse won hands down. Marisol and Abigail had three birthdays between their kids this weekend as well, so Carlisle and Esme would be busy with the camcorder and doing what good grandparents do best: Spoiling. That, and following Dorianne around taking footage of her huge baby belly while trying to capture Mary’s little boy’s first smile. With thirteen grandchildren, and more on the way, they stayed extremely busy even though they retired years ago.

Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rose were waiting for us when we pulled into the auditorium parking lot. Jasper and Alice’s youngest, Jasmine, stood looking at Everett, Rose and Emmett’s last son. Jasmine was a carbon of Jasper, with huge blue eyes and long, curly blonde hair, but she was tiny like Alice. She looked like a beautiful porcelain doll. Everett was the same as Emmett; dark hair, blue eyes, dimples and curls. And at fourteen, he was already almost as tall as Edward. It was fun watching Alice and Rose be pregnant together for a change without joining them. Four was quite enough for us.

Between the three couples, we managed to have ten children of our own all together, and all of us were active foster families, as well as grandparents, or soon to be grandparents in Alice and Jasper’s case. Charlie and Lily were expecting little Marie Susanne Masen in a few weeks.

Carlie grabbed Alice and Jasper’s son, Clayton, by the hand and headed off towards the doors, as did Edrick with Emmett and Rose’s daughter, Bellany. Everett shyly reached for Jasmine’s hand and she let him take it. The two of them together were almost comical because of their height differences, but the way they looked at each other made it clear that it didn’t matter. The six of us looked at each other and nodded and smiled knowingly, recognizing the all too familiar signs. In a few more years, we would probably be doing this again, weddings and all.

Grandma Renee was holding Mikey on her lap in her wheelchair, and he was looking around wide eyed at everyone we passed as Edward wheeled them down the aisles to the designated wheelchair area. I couldn’t help but feel a little sad as we walked through the auditorium behind the kids to find seats. Grandpa Charlie would have loved to have been here today to see this. He went home to Grammy and Poppa a few years ago right after the twins graduated high school. He and his namesake grandson were the best of buddies, and dad did indeed teach all the kids how to fish. The month before he died, he and little Charlie went on their last fishing weekend, and his grandson skunked him not only in fish size, but quantity as well. I don’t think I had ever seen my dad so proud and at peace. His work here was done.

Mikey started fussing a little, so I took him from Renee and walked around with him to quiet him down. The lights went down and the standard graduation processional music began playing as the graduating class filed into the auditorium to take their seats. Allison looked up as she entered through the doors, a huge smile spreading across her face when I held up Mikey’s arm and waved to her. An hour and a half later, all the boring speeches had been delivered and all the names called and diplomas handed out. Then it was over.

Allison came running up to me with her arms stretched out to take Mikey, and gave me a one armed hug before being swept up into a blazing kiss by Anthony.

“It seems like only yesterday we were dropping her and Charlie off at kindergarten. Where did the time go?” I asked the man who had been standing next to me for the past twenty five years. We watched proudly as our daughter showed off her baby boy to her sorority sisters while her husband’s arms never left from around her, and his eyes held nothing but love and devotion for only her and their son.

“It was well spent, my love. Very well spent.” Edward wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in for one of his kisses that still made my heart speed up and my knees go weak after all these years.

“And they say the youth of today are the ones all over each other like horny weasels in public,” a sarcastic voice growled from next to us. We looked up to see our youngest son, Edrick, standing with his arms crossed over his chest and shaking his head and rolling his big brown eyes at us, as if he could shame us. Bellany was trying but failing miserably to stifle her giggles as she propped her chin on his shoulder and looked at us with a raised eyebrow, her brown curls falling into her sparkling blue eyes. She was Emmett made over in female form, her quirky personality a perfect contrast to Edrick’s overly serious side. Together, they reminded me very much of a younger version of Edward and myself.

Carlie bounced up dragging Clayton by the hand, laughing at us as well. They were quite the contrasting pair. Carlie got Renee’s fair features, light aqua eyes, and a lighter version of Edward’s hair. Clayton, however, got Alice’s jet black hair and Jasper’s mother’s dark steel blue eyes. He was built just like Jasper, lean and rugged looking, but strikingly handsome. He acted like Jasper, too. Very quiet and reserved. The way Carlie bounced with excitement constantly made it plainly obvious she spent way too much time with Alice. She and Alice were truly kindred spirits, and sometimes I wondered if her intended spirit destination didn’t accidentally get crossed with someone else’s somehow during her creation.

“I take it the four of you want us all to show up for your next dance as chaperones and enjoy each others’ company in front of all your friends just like we’re doing right now, huh?” They were about to protest when Alice caught wind of the conversation.

“Ooh, we can go shopping and get matching outfits, then I can do all our hair and Rose can do our makeup. Everyone can go and it’ll be so much fun!” By the time Alice got through laying it on thick, Edward was shaking with silent laughter as all four kids were begging us not to put ourselves out on their account. Message delivered.

“You guys carry on. I’m sure nobody really minds,” Bellany said with wide, innocent eyes.

“Thank you. I think we will. Bella?” And with that, I was back in Edward’s arms for more of the man I could never get enough of. Edward and I recently celebrated our twenty fifth wedding anniversary. Having survived what we did to get here, we tried to remember to treasure each day for the gift it was.

After the twins were born, I went back to work for two weeks and couldn’t stand it. I had had my fill of Blue Mondays, and I wanted to be with my own babies for a change. I still worked part time as a counselor, but no longer worked the field. I have respect, however, for those women who manage to work full time and still run a household, too. Their work is truly never done, just put off until after the world gets its usually unfair share of their time, or their laundry piles burst the doors off their house, whichever comes first. Those gals take multitasking to a whole new level.

Edward went into private practice not long after we were married to give him more time at home with us, but he still takes CPS cases and special cases when the need for his expertise arises. We’re both looking forward to retiring in a few years after Carlie finishes college. Dr. Jacob and Leah Black’s son, Liam, helped us add a vacation fund to our portfolio a couple of years ago that we’re planning to use for a trip of a lifetime back to Maui for our second honeymoon. He highly recommended it, as he and his wife, Amber, had done the same trip with his in-laws, Dr. Ben and Angela Cheney, for their anniversary last year. Yes, the Testosterone Twins finally settled down and we were now all very good friends. For several years, we all had the honor of being known as the Pampers Parade because we all had so many kids in diapers at the same time.

Even though my time at work was reduced, my desire to be involved only doubled, and we applied and became a foster family. The frustrating memories from my days as a child advocate case worker of trying to find good, caring families to step up and join the program stuck with me after I left my job, and I couldn’t sit by and not help. Over the past twenty years, we have fostered over sixty children from every walk of life for various lengths of time. The same went for Alice and Rose. Both of them have fostered nearly as many children through their homes. It has enriched our families so much, and I finally got to take a few of them home like I always wanted to and helped make them better. Having worked in the system, I had a unique perspective on how important and pivotal a good foster home could be in a child’s life. I like to think that maybe somehow, what we offered to the children we helped will help to change the world for the better somewhere down the line. I don’t know about Karma, but I do know about blessings. The more you give, even more than that you will receive.

Through it all, Edward has been my rock, my lover, and my life. We’ve ridden that Carousel many times around and filled our albums full to the brim with love and things worth sharing and remembering. Together with our friends and family, we’ve also continued to work the garden of advocacy for those with no voice. Besides our children and grandchildren, that will be our most cherished legacy.

I’m so glad we’ve had these past years to spend together. I had always considered Emmett and Rose, and Jasper and Alice as my family, but with our children marrying, we’re now permanently connected by blood as well as love. Sometimes it does get a bit confusing trying to keep all the lines straight and remember who is related to whom, but the most important thing is we’re together, and have been through each others’ trial, triumphs, and tragedies. I wouldn’t trade the past twenty five years for any amount of riches in the world. Why should I? With God’s blessings, the treasure that is our circle of love is more than I could ever hope for. It leaves me wanting for nothing, owning everything, and happy beyond all reason.

I can’t think of anything more valuable than that.

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