Deirdre O'Dare Treading Dangerous Ground

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T

READING

D

ANGEROUS

G

ROUND

…He found himself gazing into the younger man’s dark eyes, mere

inches away from his own.

What he saw there both comforted and frightened him. His

reflection was there, of course, but somehow altered by another’s
perception. He also saw a longing much like his own, an urgent need
that couldn’t be ignored or denied.

They both moved at the same instant, two heads angling smoothly

into the kiss. It occurred as if carefully choreographed. No noses
bumped, and there was no clumsy twisting or shifting to find the right
connection. Something deep within each of them knew, responded as if
programmed to do so.

Balt’s lips were firm and warm, softening slightly as Jayce’s met

and meshed with them. Surprise, arousal and delight flashed through
Jayce in an instant. This was not part of his dream. He’d dreamed of
their naked bodies entangled, of clumsy hands fumbling with cocks and
clutching hard cheeks, but not this. How could it feel so right, so utterly
pleasing and yet so strange?

I never kissed another man before. The vague thought slipped

through his awareness to fade away as they both opened their mouths in
an urgency to draw more air into lungs suddenly depleted.

At that point, it seemed completely natural to taste the inside of

Balt’s mouth, sliding his tongue along the even white teeth and into the
hollows on either side, beneath the strong, high cheekbones. A faint
hint of mouthwash and coffee lingered, but neither repelled Jayce. He
suspected his mouth tasted dry and dusty, as if he’d been on the desert
for a long time. But Balt didn’t seem to mind…

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A

LSO

B

Y

D

EIRDRE

O’D

ARE

Cowboy First Aid

Karola’s Hunt

Pickup Man

Portrait Of A Cowboy

Randi’s Hellacious Adventure

The Taming of Jaelle’n

To Protect and…Seduce?

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TREADING

DANGEROUS GROUND

BY

DEIRDRE O’DARE

A

MBER

Q

UILL

P

RESS

, LLC

http://www.amberquill.com

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T

READING

D

ANGEROUS

G

ROUND

A

N

A

MBER

H

EAT

B

OOK

This book is a work of fiction. All names, characters,

locations, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination,

or have been used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons

living or dead, locales, or events is entirely coincidental.

Amber Quill Press, LLC

http://www.amberquill.com

All rights reserved.

No portion of this book may be transmitted or

reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in

writing from the publisher, with the exception of brief

excerpts used for the purposes of review.

Copyright © 2006 by Deidre O’Dare

ISBN-10 1-59279- 621-4

ISBN-13 978-1-59279-621-2

Cover Art © 2006 Trace Edward Zaber

Layout and Formatting provided by: ElementalAlchemy.com

PUBLISHED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

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To two very different Jims who led me

to a love of science fiction long years ago and another couple

who taught me that love can come in many forms

and guises but should always be accepted as the precious gift it is.

Thanks yet again to the Amber Heat staff

for allowing me to stretch my writing wings in new directions

and encouraging me to do so.

A writer could not ask for better support.

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TREADING DANGEROUS GROUND

1

TREADING

DANGEROUS GROUND

2279
Main Uni-Fleet Base, Titan

Jayce woke bathed in sweat with an aching hard-on. He’d dozed off

on his bunk, bored with this mandatory return to home base, allegedly
for R and R. Nothing to do but fret. It drove him half-mad. Of course,
he’d had that damned dream again—the one he couldn’t seem to get rid
of, no matter what he tried.

Damn, will that night ever stop haunting me? He exhaled in a jerky

sigh. It had been over a year, yet the memories were as fresh as
yesterday’s.

The action at Morte Ravine was little more than a footnote now in

the conquest of Kalibassi. The whole campaign had already been

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TREADING DANGEROUS GROUND

2

swallowed by history with the discovery of yet more new worlds to
conquer. He’d be heading out again soon to one of them.

But he still couldn’t forget. The night had been hot. Kalibassi was

always hot. Ninety percent desert, the rest of the planet was one small
super-saline ocean, almost absorbed into the sandy land masses.

Their body armor had weighed heavily on tired muscles and

blistered skin. It seemed to press the heat into flesh and bone. They’d
all thought of taking it off, but no one dared. Dusk fell as Jayce arrayed
his squad along the twisting ravine. It was the only escape route out of
Kalibar, the apparent capital of this backward world, once the main
force marched in by the wider pass to the west.

Balt—Cadet Lieutenant Baltazar Donovan—was the youngest man,

the newest soldier. Fresh from basic training, he was green as the
spring prairie. He might have been the top trainee in his class, but that
was not combat. Any concerned officer would have done the same,
Jayce had told himself. You keep the most vulnerable soldiers close
while they learn the ropes.

The plants and pests of Kalibassi were fully as dangerous as their

rag-tag military. One bite from a sand spider or any of the small, swift
adders brought quick and painful death. Even the thorns of the cactus-
like shrubs caused infection and frequent allergic reactions. There was
nothing hospitable about the place at all. It was valuable only for the
rare and precious minerals the Uni-Council coveted with avid greed.
For those resources, another world was taken.

Darkness fell, heavy as the heat. It was one of those rare nights

when all three of the Kalibassi moons were out of sight. The desert
world’s perpetual haze hid the stars from view. Without their night
vision goggles, every man jack of them might as well be blind. The
scopes relied on infra-red, which in turn required life. That night,
empty darkness as deeply black as boot polish, covered the ugly world.

Kneeling on chelvar ground cloths which were supposed to repel

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TREADING DANGEROUS GROUND

3

the vermin, the twenty soldiers settled down to wait. The keening wind,
blowing off the craggy mountains behind them, made it hard to hear if
anyone approached. The Kalibasians might be primitive, but they knew
their home. Besides having extraordinary vision, they could move
noiselessly. One could approach, grab you, and slit your throat with one
of their vicious obsidian blades, all without making a sound. When
long-distance, high-tech weapons did not stop them, they killed with
chilling efficiency.

The sand whispered as Balt edged closer, dragging his ground cloth.

When he spoke, his shivers stuttered out in his speech. “D-d-damn it, s-
s-sir. I-I-I’m scared. I didn’t think I would be, but I’m s-s-scared
shitless.”

In his mind’s eyes, Jayce could see the younger man’s face as

clearly as if it were broad daylight. He was almost too beautiful—wide-
set, liquid ebony eyes fringed with heavy lashes, firm rose-hued lips,
delicate features that somehow mirrored his odd mix of Hispanic and
Celtic heritage.

The others teased him over his looks, but he took it in good nature.

In spite of the beauty of his face, his physique was all male. He had
wide shoulders and a trim waist, long muscular legs and an athlete’s
grace. In time he would make a good soldier. But to do so, he had to
survive long enough to learn and mature.

Jayce felt the heat of the younger man’s body. Balt was that close.

“I’ll tell you a secret,” he said, his voice coming out in a rasp. “We’re
all scared, every fuckin’ time. Not many of us want to die. Certainly
none of us want it to happen on some god-forsaken dump light years
from home. Anyone who isn’t scared is a complete fool.”

He heard Balt’s rough sigh. “Honest, sir?”
“Hell, yes! I’m scared right now even though I’ve seen action on a

dozen worlds, from ice-bound Boreanor to steamy jungles on
Questane…and now this shit pit.”

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After a moment of silence, the younger soldier spoke again, softly,

so softly Jayce barely heard him. “Is it all right, er, do you mind if I
stay here with you?”

Jayce nodded, then realized the action could not be seen unless Balt

had his goggles on and was looking directly at Jayce. “No, it’s okay.”

Before the night ended, he found himself holding the young soldier.

Just holding him, nothing more, much as a parent would console a
frightened child. He only meant to give the elemental comfort of
human contact, yet later his dreams took the situation far beyond that.

Even now, months later, he could still feel Balt’s sleek, muscled

body. He could feel the heat and the sudden awareness that had swept
through him. It was a blatantly sexual heat, an encompassing hunger
that sank its fangs into him and would not let go.

They all survived the night. Near dawn the Kalibassi rabble finally

came. They did not sneak silently, but stumbled along, announcing
their approach with whimpers and wails. Laser rifles made short work
of them. When the light grew stronger, it revealed the bulk of the
refugees had been not warriors but females and cubs. At that revelation,
Balt had been noisily sick.

Jayce hadn’t felt too good himself. He’d fought back the urge to

puke as he looked over the singed bodies, smelled the acrid odor of
burned flesh. The sight was not pretty, nor was there victory in such a
deed. His people had been warriors since time immemorial, but no coup
came from remote, indiscriminate slaughter. Times like that, he
questioned the career he had chosen, but it was far too late to take
another path.

When he went home on leave a few weeks later, his family and clan

held a ceremony for him. The sweat lodge, the chants and prayers, and
the dancing had all been done to cleanse the evil from his spirit, to
purify his mind.

Had it all been in vain?

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5

Perhaps he did not believe enough anymore. He’d been away from

the old folks and the old ways much too long.

He’d had a number of women since the night on Kalibassi, yet none

of them had really satisfied him. He might just as well have jacked off
and saved his time or money. Was this strange haunting desire for a
fellow soldier as abominable as it felt to him? He wished he had talked
to his grandfather more, confessed this matter about Balt. Could the old
shaman’s wisdom have given him some comfort? It was too late now.
He’d probably never know. By the time he returned home again, the
old man would likely be dead. There was no one else he trusted enough
to unburden himself to.

At times he thought he should just swallow the capture pill to end it

all swiftly. Perhaps that time would come, although he couldn’t quite
do it yet. In a couple of days he would be shipping out again. It
couldn’t come too soon. The pressures of combat might drive the
memories and the desires out of his mind.

By the ancients, I pray it is so. Otherwise, I think I’ll go crazy.

* * *

The next afternoon found Jayce once again stretched on his bunk.

This time he had music playing loud enough to keep him awake. He
wasn’t going to risk another dream. Drifting with the eerie sounds of
his ancestor’s cedar flute, he was neither fully awake nor really asleep.
The rap on his door jolted him back into the present.

Jayce swung his bare feet off the bunk before padding across the

floor to fling the door open. He was ready to growl at the unexpected
caller. None of his friends were on base right now, so there was no one
who should be looking for him. He didn’t feel the least bit sociable.

The sound died in his throat. Had his wishful hunger materialized

the object of his desire? Could it really be Balt Donovan who stood
there, armed with a hesitant smile? Balt wore the silver slashes of
Captain JG now on the collar of his tunic. A new maturity strengthened

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6

his face. He had two campaign ribbons—Kalibassi and another that
looked like Gomorrow. Jayce registered all those details in a shocked
instant.

“Can I come in? When I heard you were here, I knew I had to come

see you. I need to thank you for helping me through my first taste of
combat. It was easier the next time, but you were right, I was still
scared.”

Jayce could not speak. Instead he simply stepped back, leaving

space for the other man to enter the room. Balt was no longer a green
cadet, almost an apprentice soldier. He was an officer now, a man in
every sense of the word, his beauty tempered with subtle traces of pain,
regret and pride. He held out a hand. Jayce took it, letting the clasp
bridge the space he could not span with words. A trickle of warmth slid
along the inside of his arm and down his body.

“You’ve done well,” he croaked after a long moment. “I can see

that by your new insignia, and something in your face as well.”

“You’re still a captain. I’m surprised. I’d have thought you’d be a

major by now. Weren’t you on Hades II?”

“Promotions get slower the higher you go,” Jayce admitted. “It’s

the new young troops that fall, leaving gaps in the ranks. Those that
survive earn their chevrons, then maybe appointment to the officer
corps. You should know that by now.”

Balt nodded. He looked around the stark room, as if taking in the

minimal furniture and Spartan atmosphere. “I heard you’re shipping out
soon, maybe tomorrow. That’s why I came today, to be sure I didn’t
miss you. Most of the troops with orders are over at the club, drowning
their worries in nightberry wine or some other booze. I looked, but
didn’t see you there. When I asked, someone said you might be in your
room.”

“I don’t drink,” Jayce said. “I don’t handle alcohol well. It usually

disagrees with me to the point I get sick before I get a good buzz. I

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wasn’t in the mood to socialize anyway.”

Balt drew in a long breath. A fleeting concern danced through his

eyes. “Would you rather I left?”

Yes. No. Oh hell! “No, you came to see me, so the least I can do is

be polite, I guess. I was just surprised. I’d been thinking about you.”

A faint blush spread across Balt’s cheeks. “I think about you a lot. I

guess you’ve become a kind of hero in my mind.”

“Don’t do that,” Jayce said harshly. “There’s nothing here to

idolize, little to admire.”

“No!” A shadow of distress crossed Balt’s expressive face. “No,

you’re a good man, a good officer. Brave, yet compassionate and
caring. As I rise through the ranks, I hope I can be such a man.”

Jayce stepped back, sank onto the foot of the narrow bed. “Why are

you here? Why did you really come to see me? I don’t need anyone’s
hero worship. That’s stupid. You know better…or you should.”

Balt flashed a brief smile. Hesitancy colored his expression. “I—I’d

like to think we could be friends,” he said. “At least friends…” He held
both hands out to Jayce. “Please.”

As if pulled by a force beyond his resistance, Jayce stood again and

moved closer, not stopping until he stood chest to chest with the
younger man. Balt reached, wrapping both arms around him. Then
Jayce found himself embracing Balt as well. They were of a height,
which made it seem awkward. In spite of that, it felt very right.

He could feel the rhythm of Balt’s heartbeat, faster than he’d

expect. He smelled the spicy scent of aftershave, an odor not sweet but
tangy, like lemon mixed with cinnamon.

Then he found himself gazing into the younger man’s dark eyes,

mere inches away from his own.

What he saw there both comforted and frightened him. His

reflection was there, of course, but somehow altered by another’s
perception. He also saw a longing much like his own, an urgent need

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8

that couldn’t be ignored or denied.

They both moved at the same instant, two heads angling smoothly

into the kiss. It occurred as if carefully choreographed. No noses
bumped, and there was no clumsy twisting or shifting to find the right
connection. Something deep within each of them knew, responded as if
programmed to do so.

Balt’s lips were firm and warm, softening slightly as Jayce’s met

and meshed with them. Surprise, arousal and delight flashed through
Jayce in an instant. This was not part of his dream. He’d dreamed of
their naked bodies entangled, of clumsy hands fumbling with cocks and
clutching hard cheeks, but not this. How could it feel so right, so utterly
pleasing and yet so strange?

I never kissed another man before. The vague thought slipped

through his awareness to fade away as they both opened their mouths in
an urgency to draw more air into lungs suddenly depleted.

At that point, it seemed completely natural to taste the inside of

Balt’s mouth, sliding his tongue along the even white teeth and into the
hollows on either side, beneath the strong, high cheekbones. A faint
hint of mouthwash and coffee lingered, but neither repelled Jayce. He
suspected his mouth tasted dry and dusty, as if he’d been on the desert
for a long time. But Balt didn’t seem to mind.

Finally they had to part, to step back from one another and breathe

normally for a few moments. Jayce felt every bit as shocked as Balt
looked, yet a kind of peace came over him as he gazed into the younger
man’s face. He found he knew Balt with an intimacy he had shared
with few in his thirty-five years of life. It was almost as if he’d located
the missing part of his soul, the other half of his own identity. It was
frightening, yet exhilarating.

He put his hands on Balt’s shoulders, wrapped his fingers around

the hard curve of the younger man’s upper arms. The heat seeping
through Balt’s uniform almost burned his palms, yet Jayce wanted to

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feel skin, bare flesh with a hint of bone beneath it.

“Can—would you mind taking your tunic off?” His voice sounded

rusty, as if he hadn’t spoken in days.

Balt’s eyes widened for an instant before he nodded. “Okay. Sure.”

He drew free of Jayce’s clasp, and took a step back, one hand working
at the buttons. In a moment he shrugged out of the garment and placed
it on the back of the straight chair.

Beneath the regulation night-blue tunic of the Marine arm of Uni-

Fleet to which they were both assigned, he wore only a light, thin
undershirt without sleeves. The fabric was soft and clinging, molding
over the taut muscles of his chest and stomach. Below that, his growing
erection pushed out the fly of his lighter blue uniform trousers.

Without looking, Jayce could feel his own cock, almost fully erect

inside his thin PT shorts. Their bodies clearly knew no hesitation, no
uncertainty at all. He couldn’t decide if that was good or bad. He was
scared, more scared than he had ever been in the face of combat. Yet
even that fear was arousing. His heart beat like a pow-wow drum, with
a deep, hard rhythm. Blood pounded through his body, swelling his
cock until it hurt, while making his skin feel tight and tender all over.

When they again moved into an embrace, Jayce let his hands roam

over the other man’s body, learning its contours. Balt similarly
explored him, finally slipping his hands beneath the T-shirt Jayce wore
to stroke his chest and back.

“I’ve dreamed of this,” Balt confessed, his voice ragged. “I never

forgot how it felt, when you held me that night on Kalibassi. I wanted
to crawl into your skin with you, to become one entity.”

“I—that night stayed with me, too.” Jayce begrudged the

confession, but he had to make it, had to be honest. In a few short
minutes they had bypassed deception and dissembling. He could no
more pretend to Balt than to himself, and he was far too honest and
brutal to hide from the truth, no matter how unsettling it might be.

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Among the Uni-Fleet troops, all relationships were frowned upon,

especially those between senior and junior officers, or officers and
enlisted. It made no difference what the sexes of the two people were.
All the women had a birth control implant so there were no issues about
pregnancy. Otherwise, there was no differentiation between the sexes.
If an attachment came to the attention of higher echelons, they lost no
time separating the pair and assigning them duty stations as far apart as
the universe allowed.

Fraternization was simply not permitted. Casual sex tended to be

ignored, but no real bonding was tolerated, no connection that might
cause favoritism or distract any soldier from his or her duty. An officer
was expected to have exactly equal concern for each of the troops he or
she led, no favorites. The code was stern and unforgiving.

Jayce knew this, and he knew Balt did, too. Already Jayce sensed

this was not going to be only a casual fling, a one-night stand. He’d
been in much deeper than that since Kalibassi. They were treading
dangerous ground from the very first moment.

The second knock on the door in less than thirty minutes interrupted

them. They sprang apart, both breathing heavily. Balt grabbed for his
tunic and shoved his arms through the sleeves, fighting the fabric as it
tangled.

Jayce mumbled, “In a minute,” as if he were half-asleep. Silently,

he gestured toward the closet-sized head, opening off the room.

Jayce waited until Balt entered and drew the accordion door shut

behind him before he opened the door into the corridor.

A young trooper stood there, an apologetic expression on her face.

Jayce recognized the assistant aide to the station commander, an
admiral of the Uni-Fleet. “Captain Hightower?”

He nodded sharply, not trusting himself to speak.
She handed him a vid-disk. “Your orders, sir. I think they’ve been

changed. It’s urgent or I wouldn’t have bothered you. Admiral Vantage

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insisted that you be informed at once.”

If she noticed he still had half a hard-on, she didn’t give a sign of it.

He didn’t think her gaze ever dropped below his shoulders. Jayce took
the disk and thanked her as courteously as he could. Another wish
come true, perhaps. Beware what you wish for.

The disk should hold his ticket off this world, away from this

stifling station. The headquarters was rife with politics and
bureaucracy, the epitome of all aspects of the military that Jayce found
most hateful. He shut the door softly before standing, disk in hand,
staring blankly at the battleship gray plasteel floor.

Too much, too soon. He couldn’t comprehend it all at once. Balt,

Balt, Balt. Every beat of his heart seemed to repeat the name.

Finally, he pressed his thumb to the chip that would start the vid. As

words and images flashed across the shiny surface, he gasped. Shock
knifed through him, sharp as a fine-honed blade. No! Oh no!

Disbelief welled. He clung to it, although common sense told him

there was no mistake. He didn’t realize Balt had emerged from the
latrine until the younger man’s arms closed around him from behind.

“What is it, Jayce? What’s wrong?”
Balt spoke softly, almost into his ear, so close Jayce could feel the

slight breeze of the other man’s breath across his jaw and neck.

For a long moment, Jayce leaned against Balt’s body, letting the

strength and heat support him.

“Atsileigh—my orders are for Atsileigh.”
“Holy fucking shit,” Balt said, in an awed whisper. “Why would

they send you there?

“Atsileigh. My God. Has the council gone mad?”
They both knew all the evil rumors about the small, remote world,

closer to the Farbegone Sector than to Old Terra and its neighbors.
Several centuries ago, a rebellious group of space soldiers, mostly
Navajo, had stolen a small ship and gone AWOL. They’d ended up on

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the harsh, remote world, then at the very edge of known space.

From then on, rumors had grown since very few visited the distant

colony and fewer still survived to return. There were white buffalo
there and the settlers had reverted to their pre-Columbian state. There
were gems and gold and other valuable resources, which the colonists
traded to pirates for technology. It was heaven and hell rolled into one.

Since then, other small bands had occasionally fled there as well,

criminals and derelicts, rebels and fools. It was called the Rebel Planet
by the higher officials, and the Bad Injun Planet by those who
eschewed the polite and politically correct terms when talking among
themselves.

“Seems the council wants a way-station there from which they can

go on farther into the Outer Reaches. I’m to negotiate with the colonists
or the rebels or whoever is in charge for a patch of ground, just enough
for a station. I’m to promise them they can keep the rest.”

“Are you going to go?”
Jayce twitched one shoulder in an irritated shrug. “Do I have a

choice?”

Balt gave a bitter laugh. “Not really. I guess you could run and join

them. It’s that or obey, isn’t it?”

Jayce turned, moving in the circle of Balt’s embrace. “I’ll go. I may

be able to retire by the time I get back, go home and live in a shanty on
the Rez or maybe a condo here on Titan. I’m getting tired of it all, so
very tired, but they put a carrot on the stick. I’ll go a major.”

Balt shook his head, his eyes shiny with emotion. “When?”
“Now…tonight. I have to go to sick bay and get an implant so I

won’t need to carry the kind of comm-gear that might stand out too
much. I’ve never done much intel work, but enough to know how to
act, the way to infiltrate and gather information, the way to talk to
people and bring them around.”

Balt didn’t speak. He simply reached up with both hands to cup

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Jayce’s face. Then he leaned forward the slight distance necessary to
bring their lips together. It was a harsh, wrenching, violent kiss, a kiss
of claiming and yet sundering. Jayce shut his eyes to let the full impact
of sensation and emotion wash over him. It might be a long time before
he would see or touch Balt again. He might never. This might be the
last time.

He opened to the urgent probing of Balt’s tongue, responding with

thrusts of his own. They clung to each other, as if somehow they could
meld their two separate selves into a single entity. Nothing had ever felt
so completely right and yet the pain was almost too much to bear. Just
this one time…

Jayce was too stunned to react when Balt released him abruptly to

kneel before him. Balt’s hands skimmed down Jayce’s torso. He caught
the elastic waist of Jayce’s shorts, dragging them quickly over his hips
and letting them drop around his ankles.

Although Jayce’s conscious mind still whirled with confusion,

darting ahead to the unexpected assignment and back, to the severing of
this fragile new union and a future that looked very bleak, his
subconscious had already responded. Freed of the constricting fabric,
his cock went rigid, thrusting into Balt’s hand. Jayce widened his
stance, bracing himself as Balt stroked the length of his shaft, once and
again.

He felt the strength and power in the other man’s hand, although the

clasp remained exquisitely gentle, a touch filled with love.

“Don’t,” Jayce croaked. “You don’t need to do this.”
“Yes, I do. I need it even more than you do. It won’t take long.

Then you can go. But we’ll have this moment, this memory to keep.”

Jayce took a half step back, kicking one foot free of the dropped

shorts. He braced his shoulders against the wall as Balt licked slowly
around the head of his dick, tickling the hundreds of little nerve buds
there with swift, darting strokes. Jayce moaned, clenching his fists to

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keep from grabbing Balt by the ears. He wanted to smash the other
man’s face into his crotch, grind himself against the stubble of beard,
the strong, angled planes and the unique beauty that was there. If he
once grabbed, he was not sure he could let go.

Balt opened his mouth wide and eased down over Jayce’s cock,

reaching, stretching, somehow taking almost all of it. Jayce’s muscles
clenched as fiery darts of pleasure seared along his nerves. When Balt
began a slow rhythmic motion, Jayce added to it with thrusts of his
hips, involuntary and almost unaware.

Pressure built, a tightening knot of compulsion in his gut. He shut

his eyes, although he wanted to watch. He simply could not absorb
every sensation at once. His hearing faded, vision fading to a ruddy
haze. The pain of his nails digging into his palms was distant, hardly
felt. He dimly sensed the cool, slick wall behind his back, but the only
thing that really mattered was the hot, wet pressure of Balt’s mouth. He
was going to go off any second. Now. Oh, my God!

He came hard, his prick jerking and squeezing with the force of it.

Only after the last spurt did Balt rock back on his heels, sliding his lips
slowly off Jayce’s cock as it subsided. Then Jayce could open his eyes.
Balt looked up at him, a wry smile twisting his lips, still slick and wet.

“You’ve done that before,” Jayce accused. “You knew exactly what

to do.”

Balt shook his head. “No, that was the first time. I only know what I

like, what felt good when I bought a whore’s services or conned my
way into some girl’s favor back home.”

Jayce ran his fingers through his close-cropped hair, feeling the

sweat on his scalp. Trickles of it ran down his body. He was breathing
as if he had run a mile under full gear.

“If I’m not at sick bay like ten minutes ago, they’re going to come

looking for me. I don’t want to go. I owe you a release, too, but there’s
no time.”

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Balt stood, shaking his head. “I know you have to go. I’m not

asking, would not accept if you offered. What I just did was not what I
came here to do. I want you to believe that, but I’m not sorry. I didn’t
realize until I saw you again that I love you, really love you. That what
I felt was so much more than just admiration, friendship or hero-
worship.”

It was Jayce’s turn to shake his head. “No, don’t say that! Don’t

bind yourself to me. I won’t come back from this assignment. I can see
it clearly now. I’m not sure what I’ve done, but someone isn’t happy
with me. This is how they handle it. The higher echelons know how to
send you someplace, a final assignment that’ll go bad. They may make
you out a hero to your kin, to the press, but you’ll be dead.”

He reached out and caught Balt’s hand, the same one that had

stroked him so tenderly.

“Go in peace and harmony, my—my friend, my true friend. Have a

beautiful life. Be happy. Especially be happy.” His voice broke and his
vision misted. For a moment Jayce was paralyzed.

Balt straightened his uniform, squared his shoulders and took two

steps toward the door. For a long breath, he turned back. He smiled
again, this time a mixture of rue and whimsy painting his face.

“You won’t be rid of me that easy, Jayce. We will meet again.

We’ll be together as we’re meant to be. As my mother’s people say,
Vaya con Dios.’” He was through the door and gone before Jayce
could respond.

* * *

Atsileigh did not have white buffalo. As far as Jayce had been able

to see by several ten-days after his arrival, it didn’t have gold, gems or
any other wonderful treasures either. It was as stark, barren and ugly as
any place he’d ever been.

His landing pod had come to rest in a sandy patch of desert in the

lap of some of the wickedly jagged mountains that rambled across the

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small planet’s surface. It took him three days to find any of the
inhabitants. Members of the hunting party he encountered were
suspicious, but not hostile. They willingly gave him the shelter, food
and water, which, by then, he sorely needed.

From talks with the chief of the band from which the hunters came,

he learned that clans and tribes were scattered over the livable regions
of the rocky little world. Travel from the territory of one band to the
next was toilsome and slow. The people had a few worn hovercraft, but
those were saved for the most dire emergencies. Mostly they walked or
rode some of the scaly, lizard-like beasts they had managed to tame for
draft and saddle animals.

Weapons were the main application of higher technology they had

acquired. Both regular firearms and older model laser rifles were held
by each band and maintained with great care. Some of them were
amazingly ancient, but still fired, still killed.

Living conditions on Atsileigh were harsh and primitive. Most of

the people had barely enough to eat, while scarce water seemed to be
the most precious commodity they had. Jayce had grown up in
conditions equally tough as a boy on the reservation, but that had been
long ago. Now, as he shared their stark lives, he was not sure why
people would choose to live this way. Then he realized it was the only
route they had to being truly free.

Jayce discovered that each band was more or less autonomous.

Although there was no warfare among them, no one leader would
presume to make decisions for anyone other than the members of his or
her own band. A couple of young, single men from the first band he
encountered accompanied Jayce as he moved on to find others.

He quickly recognized that their social structure required him to

gather them all, or at least an official representative of each group, to
meet with the diplomatic team the Uni-Council would send to negotiate
an agreement.

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The implant, a tiny chip buried in the bone behind his left ear,

allowed him to communicate with the fast little ship that had brought
him from Titan. It was in a low angle orbit around the planet, virtually
invisible to human eyes. The ship relayed information to and from
higher headquarters. Jayce needed only to speak in the faintest whisper
to be heard. Per his orders, he officially reported once every twenty-
four hours. Most of the time the connection was in an idle mode,
activated only if he spoke a certain phrase. At least it was supposed to
be. Sometimes Jayce wondered. The natives seemed to accept his need
to go off for a few minutes every evening as some sort of religious
observance and did not intrude.

It took him nine ten-days, a quarter of a year, to visit each band and

tribe, gathering the chiefs or their representatives to meet with the
diplomats. There was still no assurance they would all agree to the
proposal to establish a maintenance depot and refueling station here on
their primitive world, but they had agreed to hear the officials and
consider it.

The last night before the meeting, he sat with a group of the chiefs

and their eldest sons and daughters around a small fire. For a moment,
he allowed himself the luxury of recalling his final hours at
headquarters, the brief time he had spent with Balt. Will I ever see him
again?
He could not answer his own plaintive question. A shadowy
misgiving hovered at the edges of his thoughts. He had an intuitive
sense that something was not going to go well, but he could not call up
a vision of what catastrophe might befall him.

In the end, he simply stared into the flickering vermillion, gold and

copper of the flames, seeing Balt’s face, and the faces of friends and
family long left behind and almost forgotten. A chilling certainty he
would never see any of them again settled low in his belly. It soured the
spicy stew he had eaten with his new friends. He had found much to
admire in these people, who were a kind of distant kin. They had

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accepted—no, almost adopted him. They also seemed to put a level of
trust in his story that boded well for a potential agreement.

With a few small changes, I could live here for the rest of my life

and be content. The surprising thought came out of nowhere and yet
did not shock him.

Here, if he could somehow reach Balt and ask the younger man to

join him, they could live in peace. They would not have to fear that
each parting would be their last. Balt came from a wealthy family.
Perhaps he could obtain a few things to make life more comfortable,
even help the longer term residents reach a higher standard of living. It
was a sweet dream, though idle.

* * *

The landing craft for the diplomatic team was much larger and more

luxurious than the stripped down one-man pod Jayce had used. It
descended in a masking cloud of rainbow-colored smoke and flames, a
trick obviously intended to impress the Atsileighan authorities.

Jayce was not impressed. From their expressions, most of the chiefs

were not either. Although they did not use much of it, they were not
unaware of technology or as simple and naïve as the Uni-Council
thought them to be.

The Council will not get their base here for a few strings of beads

and other trinkets. Jayce gave a bitter smile at the thought.

The first day’s parlays were little more than a meaningless

diplomatic dance, every word and gesture stylized and theatrical. By
the second day, serious negotiations began. After three days of such
talks, Jayce started to believe the chiefs would agree to establishment
of a base, although within strict and limiting parameters. He prayed the
Uni-Council would be satisfied with that, at least for a while.

He was a mere observer, not officially part of either side. From this

vantage point, he gained a strong respect for two of the band chiefs,
older seasoned men with a level of wisdom he could but envy. Their

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pointed questions and careful guarding of the rights and autonomy of
their people were truly amazing. How he would love to have
commanding officers and officials of that caliber. Were there even men
of that type left any more in his circles? He had his doubts.

At that point, the Uni-Council diplomats suggested as many people

as possible be assembled for a feast, held to mark the momentous
occasion of this initial agreement. Lulled now by what they saw as a
respectful and cooperative finale to the process, most of the chiefs were
willing to do this. Runners went out in many directions to gather the
clans, at least those within a day or two of travel.

Jayce’s misgivings grew stronger, but there was nothing he could

say or do. He felt foolish, allowing himself to be tormented by
groundless hunches and doubts for which he had no concrete basis.
Still, he felt the chilling brush of an owl’s wing across his face, the cold
shadow of the vulture blocking him from the sun. Denial did not make
either go away.

The feast day dawned, brightened by the rising of Atsileigh’s twin

rusty suns, almost together, which only happened once or twice a year.
A festive atmosphere prevailed. Over small, smokeless fires the women
of the various bands cooked special dishes to honor the visitors. A
second lander came down, bringing rare treats and delicacies imported
from many worlds.

At last all was ready. They waited in patient rows for the formal

procession by the three men and two women of the Uni-Council
delegation. The group appeared at the hatchway of their craft, dressed
in brilliant-colored robes that contrasted sharply with the dull grays and
tans of leather and coarse cloth worn by the Atsileighans. Jayce dressed
now as one of natives, the close-fitting space suit he had arrived in
worn to tattered scraps by his travels.

The agreement, scribed on a rare piece of parchment, held a place

of honor on the first table. Many had filed by to look at it, noting the

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20

signatures or hand prints of the clan chiefs, the ornate signet marks of
the delegates. Everyone had heard it was to be enshrined within a
plastacine box and hung on the wall of the main building when the
station complex was constructed.

When the catastrophe finally came, it all happened too quickly.

Jayce started when guardsmen suddenly appeared on either side of the
five delegates as they paused at the top of the ramp. The troopers were
armed with the latest and most powerful laser rifles. As one, they raised
the weapons and began to fire into the crowd. The searing blasts felled
row after row of men, women and children. Everyone was too stunned
to move, most even unable to scream their shock and pain.

For a numbed instant Jayce watched in horror. Then he threw

himself forward between the hail of fury and the eldest chieftain, who
miraculously still stood. His only thought was he had to save at least
one of the brave, wise men he had come to admire. The savage beams
of pure energy seared his flesh before darkness closed over him.

The Uni-Council delegation had scarcely lifted clear of the carnage

when a small, sleek ship slipped in over the scene, flying low and
slowly among mountain peaks to remain unnoticed. As the delegation’s
transport faded into the dusky sky, the slender, silver-gray craft circled
the area.

* * *

At the controls, former Uni-Fleet Captain Balt Donovan flew

slowly across the site of the gathering. A few of the fallen still stirred,
but most were clearly dead, many burned almost to cinders. Fear mixed
with a horrible rage curdled in his belly. The vicious deception and
wanton genocide that had occurred here were beyond despicable. If
Jayce had survived, which looked increasingly unlikely, how bitter he
would be to have played a part in it. Knowing what a caring and
honorable man Jayce was, Balt fought against pain-induced nausea.
Jayce would probably be near suicidal. As for himself, he wanted

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21

nothing more than to leave this place and hope the memory did not
follow him.

He had seen far too much and the sights were gruesome.
He shook off the cold hand of despair. No, I can’t leave without

knowing, without being sure. I have to find him. Even if I only get
charcoal to take home.

Balt set the little craft down gently near where the delegation’s

rocket had departed. Although Balt’s black market communication
implant had been imperfectly tuned, he had heard fragments of Jayce’s
most recent transmissions to headquarters, ending with a broken cry of
distress at the beginning of the slaughter. The anguish in that
incoherent sound tore his heart out.

He was right—they hadn’t planned for Jayce to come back. I would

not have believed—a year ago, even less, I would not have believed this
could happen.

When he opened the hatch and stepped out, the odor of burned flesh

assaulted his senses. It took him back briefly to the long-ago dawn on
Kalibassi. He could control the urge to vomit now, but the smell was as
disgustingly horrible as ever. He walked slowly among the fallen,
searching faces and bodies for anything familiar. His two loyal
retainers followed, ready to do whatever he asked of them.

He almost missed Jayce, somehow not expecting to find him in the

clothing of the Atsileighans. His heart stuttered as he knelt to check for
a pulse. Jayce was badly burned, but people had survived with equal or
even worse damages. If shock had not killed him already, there might
be hope.

Balt found a bit of unburned skin on Jayce’s neck, where it had

been protected by the rolled collar of the vest of his crude boiled leather
body armor.

Gingerly, he touched three finger tips to the spot. He was trembling

too hard to sense a pulse. Exerting all his will, along with the discipline

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22

acquired in his rigorous training, he calmed himself, steadied his hand.
A heartbeat, faint but distinct! Mad hope leaped. It was almost too good
to be true. He and his two men fashioned a litter, eased Jayce’s seared
body onto it, and then carried him as carefully as they could back to the
ship.

No longer slow and no longer stealthy, Balt blasted off into space.

He sent the supercharged craft away under full military power.
Determination filled him. He would obtain the best care money could
buy for Jayce and would get him to that facility as quickly as possible.
Damn anything that should presume to get in his way!

* * *

Jayce awoke slowly, mentally feeling his way through a fog of pain

and confusion. Every sense seemed to be tuned to the maximum so
light was fiercely bright, sounds cruelly loud and scents practically too
pungent to bear. He opened his eyes, only to slam them shut again as
the brightness assaulted his brain. However, he saw enough in that
blink to feel sure he had never been in this place before.

Memory was hazy. He could picture the reservation and his kin

there, kids he had played and gone to school with. Then he could recall
enlisting, basic training and entry into the officer corps.

Was that it? Shouldn’t there be more to his life?
Battles. Yes, he had been involved in battles, not one but many. The

last one, though, continued to elude him. Clearly he had been badly
wounded, but he could not bring to mind the circumstances.

There was someone, too, a person he ached to see, craving

assurance the other was still alive and well. That face flashed across the
vid-screen of his memory and faded. He slipped off into sleep or
unconsciousness at that point.

The next time he awoke things were much clearer. He recognized

that he lay in a special cradle, almost surrounded by an array of gadgets
and dials. Fragile electrodes feather-touched his body in many places

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23

and a kind of tingling sensation emanated from each touch.
Experimentally, he tried to move first one arm and then the other. Soft
bands held them down, but he could move a bit, although his bones and
muscles felt new, weak and untried.

“You’re waking up at last.”
The deep voice sounded warm and pleased. Opening his eyes, Jayce

looked up into the face that had been lingering on the edges of his
awareness.

“Where…what…why?” He could not yet frame coherent questions,

but he knew he needed answers, a whole lot of them.

“You’ve been on life support and in ReGen for forty days.

Everything is back to normal now, but all of it is like new. It’ll take you
a while to build back to the strength, reflexes and control you had, but
I’ll help you. The doctors taught me how to do the therapy you’ll
need.”

The other man studied him for a moment then, worry forming a

tight crease down between his dark brows and expressive ebony eyes.
“Do you remember me?”

“Balt.” The name came from somewhere and with it images so

intensely erotic that Jayce squirmed. “I don’t think I understand about
how I was wounded.”

“There was a—a conflict. It seems you were caught in the crossfire.

Laser burns are nasty. You had a lot of them, everything from blistering
like a sunburn to third degree on about half your body. I got you out of
there as fast as I could, then got the best medical help money can buy.
Thank God it was enough. Then healing just took time.”

Jayce sensed there was much the other man had not yet revealed,

but what he did say rang true and made sense. He nodded slowly. The
ReGen cradle had begun to feel claustrophobic. He needed air and
openness around him.

He lifted an arm again, pushing at the restraints. When Balt hit an

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24

unseen control, they fell away.

“How do I get…um…get out? I really want to get out of here.”
His voice sounded rusty and strange. He found he had to stop and

concentrate on finding the right words and shaping their sounds the
proper way. It was as if he had been reborn in an adult body, with only
shadowy memories of how to do ordinary things like walking and
talking.

Balt fiddled with some more controls until the curved panel on one

side of the cradle opened and lowered. “Sure. Here you go. You’re
going to be very weak and probably clumsy for a few days, though.
You know I’m here to help you, so don’t be reluctant to ask.”

* * *

Jayce regained his strength and coordination quickly, although not

fast enough to suit him. He suspected there were still things Balt hadn’t
told him. He was growing impatient and wanted to hear it all. Yet,
however he tried to edge up to the subject in a conversation, Balt
always managed to steer their talks into other paths. Still, Jayce did
learn much, if not the precise facts he most wanted to know.

Here was home, Balt’s own deeded planetoid, a terra-formed moon

of one of Aldebran’s planets. Upon reaching a specified age a few
months earlier, and having made a good accounting of himself in the
forces, Balt’s vast fortune had been released to him. He then resigned
his commission and began to set up a rescue mission in hopes of
getting Jayce out of what he termed “a bad situation” before it was too
late. He admitted he had barely succeeded in that last. But all the bad
parts were behind them, he insisted. They were now in a safe haven.

”Quit worrying, Jayce. I can see the wheels turning. We’re safe here

for as long as we want to stay. Remember, I own the ground. I’ve
stocked up on everything I thought we could need or even want. As far
as the Powers-that-Be are aware, you’re dead. I resigned my
commission, then disappeared. With my family connections, it’ll be

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assumed I just went home and took my place somewhere in the
catacombs of Donovan y Delgado Enterprises.”

This afternoon they lay in a patch of tall, silky grass, letting the

caressing rays of the powerful sun-star bathe them in healing energies.
Jayce felt too relaxed and contented to make the effort to ask any more
questions. Although they continued to haunt the edges of his thoughts,
it was hard right now to believe that they mattered.

Jayce lost himself in the sensations of sun and wind on his bare

body, the gentle, prickly tickle of the grass beneath him and the
erotically charged awareness of the body so close to his. He took
another deep breath of sweet-scented air and let it out slowly. Beyond
the grass a streamlet meandered through the meadow in a sheltered
hollow between two hills. Small white flowers dotted the green and it
was their fragrance that hung sweet in the air. He hadn’t felt so well, so
alive in a long, long time. There seemed to be something rejuvenating
in the very air here.

He turned his head to look at his partner. They both wore only brief

trunks. The sun’s golden light reflected off Balt’s sleek body as if he
were a statue shaped from some exotic metal. Jayce reached a tentative
hand out to stroke along Balt’s ribs, reveling in the satin heat of the
other man’s skin.

Although Balt had been completely circumspect while they worked

together on the exercises Jayce needed to fine-tune his newly healed
body, the younger man hadn’t been able to completely hide the desires
he felt. They’d shone from his eyes and in each smile, flowed into
Jayce with each touch of his strong, supportive hands.

Jayce grinned to himself. The time had come to let Balt know the

healing process was complete, that Jayce would welcome the intimate
contact they both needed. Rolling onto his side to face Balt, Jayce
drifted his hand slowly downward. He drew back to miss the tempting
bulge in Balt’s trunks and stroked down the tawny length of the other

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man’s thigh. Then he slipped to the inside and began a slow journey
back up toward Balt’s crotch.

Balt reached quickly to catch his wrist. “Are you sure you’re ready,

Jayce? Well enough? Is this what you really want? You don’t have to
do a thing. There are no conditions attached to my care, to my
friendship. I realize now how presumptuous I was back on Titan. I
didn’t really give you a chance to say no.”

Jayce met Balt’s earnest gaze. “Do you think I would have?”
“Maybe. Maybe that was why I didn’t ask first.”
“Well, I’m ready now. I’ve never needed to be with anyone so

badly in all my life as I need you, right now.”

For a long moment their gazes locked in a compelling connection.

Then they both rolled to come together into each other’s arms. The
delicious sensations of warm skin to warm skin kindled a blaze of
delight that flared quickly into searing desire.

Jayce dropped one hand to the erection stretching the silky fabric of

Balt’s trunks. He rolled his palm across it, felt the other man’s flesh
leap in response. Then he slipped his hand under the waistband to free
Balt’s cock from restraint. It felt like chamois or velvet over steel, a
titillating juxtaposition of delicacy and hardness. He could just wrap his
hand around its circumference. The subtle twitch of each pulse through
its length sent shock waves through his palm straight to his own prick.

For a moment, Jayce just clasped his hand around Balt’s shaft. Its

heat and power radiated through his fist, up his arm, suffusing his
whole body. A brief moment of strangeness and unease faded and
passed. Slowly he stroked the full length, eased his grip, and slid down
to stroke again. Balt groaned deep in his chest.

“That feels so bloody good, Jayce, but let’s try something else.” He

drew away, twisted up onto his knees, then turned around so his head
was near Jayce’s feet. They both took a moment then to peel off their
trunks, baring the last bit of flesh to the sun and the caressing breeze.

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“This way we can both enjoy the same thing.” Suiting action to words,
he reached to clasp Jayce’s cock, already stiff and quivering in
anticipation.

Even that was not enough. Jayce slid in the grass, moving until he

could press his mouth against the tip of Balt’s prick. He licked the
moisture from the slit and then began to work his way around the head,
his tongue flicking into the groove beneath it. The tiny nerve buds each
swelled to create a pebbly texture as he licked.

Within moments Balt began returning the favor. The result of the

mutual stimulation was like a completed circuit. Jayce felt like sparks
of energy were flowing in a circle, constantly moving from one to the
other, igniting a conflagration of need. While he steadied Jayce’s shaft
with one hand, Balt reached with the other to stroke his balls, rolling
the roundness gently between thumb and forefinger. The effect was like
a blast of dynamite along Jayce’s sensitive nerves.

It was his turn to groan then, and he did. The exquisite sensations

were almost too much to bear. He managed to keep enough control to
continue to tease Balt’s cock…but barely. He rested his head on the
hard muscle of Balt’s thigh and slowly drew the younger man’s
hardness into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it and tasting the
sharp flavor of desire.

Balt shifted and began to lick, then suck Jayce, while a torrent of

maddening hungers swelled. Just when Jayce thought he could endure
no more of this pleasure, sharper than a keen pain, the dam burst. They
both came at almost the same instant, shooting their seed in fierce,
urgent spurts.

Jayce’s throat went tight for an instant, but then he relaxed, tasting

the life-force of his lover and letting the sticky, salty fluid trickle down
in a slow rivulet. It was like a childhood rite of blood brotherhood only
so much more, a melding and binding that he sensed nothing could ever
sever. They would go on in the future to couple in many ways,

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28

pleasuring each other in every possible manner, but this shared act had
joined them inseparably for all time.

As he lay back to rest, momentarily weak and dizzy with the

intensity of sensations and emotions that washed over him, a great
block of the recent past suddenly snapped to a clear focus in his
memory. Almost as if he hovered above the scene and observed, he saw
the small ship set down on the field of carnage, saw Balt emerge and
fight down the sickness that swept over him at the stench and horror.
He watched as Balt searched and finally found him, then fell back into
his own tortured body to feel the hesitant touch of Balt’s questing
fingers on his neck. He was near death at that moment, but somehow
that touch and the intense need radiating from the younger man had
called him back. He could not abandon that love, that need and
devotion.

Jayce leaned up on one elbow and looked at Balt, his gaze sliding

lovingly from the gently waved dark hair down to the neat shapes of his
feet. “You saved my life,” he said. “You had it all planned down to the
instant, didn’t you? A few minutes later would’ve been too late.”

Balt looked back at him, eyes weighted with a blend of joy and

anguish. “You just remembered, didn’t you? It was bad, the worst thing
I ever saw. I didn’t have time to help anyone else, but I did call the Red
Heart as we blasted away and sent them in to look for survivors, to save
anyone they could. I learned later there were several, plus the people
who had not come to the gathering. They’ve all been taken to a safe
place, an isle of peace. I’m not sure what’ll be done, but there are
elements in the Uni-Council appalled by what occurred on Atsileigh.
Someone drastically overreached his authority.”

Jayce shook his head. “I knew it was going to go awry, but I never

dreamed anything that bad. Gods, if only I could have foreseen…” For
a moment the anguish was almost more than he could bear as he relived
that horrible betrayal.

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Balt’s urgent voice called him back. “It isn’t your fault, Jayce. You

acted in good faith, as much a victim as any of the Atsileighans.” Balt’s
voice held compelling urgency, which was echoed by his gaze. “You’re
safe here, now. Major Jayson Hightower is listed as MIA on Atsileigh
and presumed dead. We’re both dead to the Powers-that-Be, and that’s
how it’ll stay. No more treading dangerous ground, my dearest friend.
We’re here, we’re together, and that’s the way I mean for things to
stay.”

Jayce read the truth in Balt’s impassioned words. It wasn’t his fault.

He didn’t need to pick up a burden of unearned guilt and let it bear him
down. He reached out to clasp Balt’s hand. “All that sounds damn
good. You’ll get no arguments from me. You saved it, so my life is
yours from here on out, heart-friend. We’re partners, now and forever.”

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D

EIRDRE

O’D

ARE

Deirdre O’Dare, who also writes contemporary romance as Gwynn
Morgan, has loved reading and writing since early childhood. She
started writing—simple verses and paraphrases of Nancy Drew and
Zane Gray—before she was out of grade school and finally settled into
romantic fiction in the last decade after leaving her “day job” as a
civilian employee of the U.S. Army. She lives in Arizona and
frequently sets her stories in the Southwest she knows and loves, but
now and then another locale calls to her creativity and she strays, even
as far as prehistoric Greece and places that exist only in her
imagination.

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