Where You Least Expect It - 1

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and
incidents either are the product of the author's
imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to
actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living
or dead, is entirely coincidental and beyond the intent of
either the author or the publisher.

Where You Least Expect It
TOP SHELF
An imprint of Torquere Press Publishers
PO Box 2545
Round Rock, TX 78680
Copyright 2011 by M. Durango
Cover illustration by Alessia Brio
Published with permission
ISBN: 978-1-61040-536-2
www.torquerepress.com
All rights reserved, which includes the right to
reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form
whatsoever except as provided by the U.S. Copyright
Law. For information address Torquere Press. Inc., PO
Box 2545, Round Rock, TX 78680.
First Torquere Press Printing: November 2011
Printed in the USA

Where You Least Expect It - 2

Chapter One

As Matt Halston left his condo building for his

weekly basketball game with his best friend, Sam
Bishop, he was happy to note that the October weather
was mild enough for an outdoor game. In the two years
since Matt had left the Army, he and Sam had rarely
missed a game, playing indoors at the YMCA during the
winter.

Autumn in the Pacific Northwest could be

unpredictable and the prolonged summery weather was
definitely not unwelcome, even if it meant Matt would
have to wait to test out the new wiper blades he'd put on
his black Ford Ranger yesterday.

Matt knew he was cutting it close by stopping for

breakfast instead of just grabbing something to go, but
he worked hard enough at his IT job during the week
and refused to be rushed on his days off. By the time he
got to the park, he realized he'd underestimated how
scarce parking would be; people were out in droves,
taking advantage of what might be the last nice weekend
for months and months.

Oh, well. Sam would bitch about having to wait, but

he'd live. Matt could see him already on the court,
shooting free-throws.

After parking, Matt waited against the fence until

Sam sauntered over, lazily dribbling the basketball.

"Hey, man. You're late."
Matt pushed off of the fence. "That's because you

kept me out 'til after midnight."

"Dude, the bar was hopping. It's not my fault you

lack a social life." Sam spun the ball on his middle
finger.

"I have a social life." Matt made a lunge for the ball.
Sam snorted and danced backwards. "Lifting weights

Where You Least Expect It - 3

at the gym and playing basketball don't count as a social
life."

"Sure they do," Matt countered. "Give me the ball."
"Bullshit, Mr. Responsibility." Sam taunted him,

keeping the ball just out of reach.

"Hey, I've got a mortgage to pay." Matt got into

Sam's personal space, trying to knock the ball out of his
hands.

"Oh, right, Mr. Brand-new-yuppie-condo owner."
Matt wasn't having any luck getting the ball. "Fuck

off. Who the hell says yuppie anymore?"

"Oooh, sensitive." Sam jumped away, passing the

ball between his hands.

"Hey, if my boss wants to pay me for my highly

valuable skills, I'm not going to live in a dump."

Sam looked affronted. "Dump? Are you calling my

place a dump?"

"Dude, your place should be condemned." Matt knew

the rent was dirt cheap for a reason.

"Oh, that's it. Prepare to pay for your slander." Sam

still hadn't let go of the ball.

Matt sprang first, knocked the ball out of Sam's hand

and took off for the net. He needed to make the most of
his offense to combat Sam's extra height. Matt wasn't
small -- not by a long shot -- but Sam's six-foot-three
left Matt at a three-inch disadvantage. Matt's bulk,
honed by the Army and hours spent in the gym, made
him just a tad less agile than tall and skinny Sam.

After Sam beat him soundly two games out of three,

they collapsed next to the fence.

Sam reached into his bag for a bottle of water and

took a long drink. "Where the hell did you disappear to
last night, anyway?"

Matt almost choked on his own water. He thought he

would have a few minutes of peace before Sam started

Where You Least Expect It - 4

giving him crap for ducking out of the bar early.

"Me? I was there until almost last call. Besides, I

turned around ten minutes after you introduced me to
your 'friend' and you were nowhere to be seen."

Sam shoved his light brown hair off his forehead.

"Dude, I wasn't gone that long. Sara and I were just
talking."

"Right, talking." Matt was relieved he wouldn't have

to hear any lurid details, at least. "I left after getting
bored to death by Misty."

"Mindy," Sam corrected.
"Whatever. She basically asked me how much money

I make and if I'd killed anybody in the Army." Matt
rubbed a hand across his eyes, remembering his aborted
attempts at small talk with the latest woman Sam tried to
set him up with. "Then she told me all about the fashion
industry. Fucking fashion, Sam. Jesus, I shop at Target.
You have a shitty-ass record with trying to set me up,
you know."

"You, my friend, are entirely too picky. She was hot

and you probably could've fucked her."

Typical Sam: no discretion when it came to picking

up women for random sex. Since Matt's girlfriend Katie
had left him, Sam had been berating him to get out and
"mingle" more. Sam had been the one constant in his life
since they'd met in high school and had seen Matt
through pretty much everything -- Humanities class, his
parents' death, his break-up with Katie; still, the concern
was starting to wear thin.

"You know I'm not into that, man," Matt explained

for possibly the millionth time. "I want to at least be able
to have a conversation with the person I'm sleeping
with."

"Whatever, man. When your balls explode from lack

of sex, don't come complaining to me."

Where You Least Expect It - 5

Matt snorted. "Trust me, you're the last person I'm

going to talk about the state of my balls with."

"Thank God for small favors." Sam shifted and

grabbed a towel out of his gym bag. "You know, you
could at least try to make an effort--"

"Don't start that shit, man." Matt shifted against the

fence, irritated that Sam wouldn't drop it. "That's the
crap Katie always gave me. It has nothing to do with
whether or not I want to make an effort. We had nothing
in common."

"You talked to Mindy for twenty minutes." Sam

shoved his water bottle back in his bag.

Matt rolled his eyes. "And how long does it take to

determine whether or not you have something in
common with someone? It's not fucking rocket science."

"Fine, you want to keep hiding in your apartment

avoiding anything that takes a minimal amount of effort,
go ahead." Sam stood up and grabbed his bag. "I've got
to go. I have a date."

"Jesus, you're storming off? What the fuck is your

problem?" Matt stalked after Sam. They'd had a few
knock-down, drag-out fights over the last decade, but
storming off wasn't Sam's usual style.

Sam turned around. "Look, I have shit to do. I'm

fucking tired of your attitude. You've been grouchy as
hell since Katie dumped you over your commitment
phobia. I figured you'd get over it, but you don't really
want to, do you? You're fucking miserable for no
apparent reason and it's a fucking downer."

Sam thought he had commitment issues? "I don't

know what the hell you're talking about." As a defense,
it was weak comeback, but it was the best Matt could
come up with.

Sam started to say something, shook his head, and

then tried again. "Matt... Look, you just... I don't know.

Where You Least Expect It - 6

You want to get a beer? I have a couple of hours before I
have to pick Kim up."

"Sure. Who the fuck's Kim?" Matt was glad to be

back on more normal ground, however sudden and
inexplicable. He didn't like to talk about his social life or
sex life -- with Sam or anyone else -- under the best of
circumstances.

Sam's lascivious grin was back. "Didn't I tell you

about Kim?" His grin got bigger. "Dude..."

***

Matt tapped his finger absently to the AC/DC track

playing on the truck's stereo as he followed the
directions his GPS spoke at him. Sam had cajoled him
into attending an "awesome" party across town; given
their earlier argument, Matt acquiesced, even though he
knew it would be like all the other parties Sam had
dragged him to over the last ten years. Still, Matt wasn't
a complete jackass and was willing to make concessions
for his friend.

That didn't mean he wasn't annoyed by the fact that

he would be wasting Saturday night watching people he
didn't really know drink too much and try to hook up.
He didn't have any other plans, but damn it, keg parties
just weren't his thing.

He was so focused on being annoyed that he almost

didn't see the bicyclist until it was too late. Matt's quick
reflexes saved both of them.

He leaned on the horn and shouted at the rider,

adrenaline overcoming his common sense. "God damn
it! Watch where you're going."

Matt could just make out the biker's features in the

evening light as the man regained his composure and
snapped back.

Where You Least Expect It - 7

"I had the right of way! Maybe you should check

your blind spot, asshole." He didn't seem very shaken in
spite of almost being flattened.

Stupid biker was probably used to almost getting

himself killed, Matt thought. "Try paying attention to
traffic and maybe you'll live longer."

The biker rolled his eyes dramatically. "Don't fucking

lecture me about how to ride."

A horn blared behind Matt, cutting off any further

argument. Matt swore and continued making his turn,
leaving the biker behind to shout expletives at him.
Fucking asshole bikers thought they owned the God
damned road.

He managed to get to his destination without further

incident and squeezed into one of the last parking spots
in the apartment complex's lot. He pulled out his cell
phone and hoped Sam's ringer wasn't drowned out by
the din of the party.

Sam didn't bother with a hello. "You'd better not be

bailing on me."

"I don't know why I let you talk me into these

things," Matt said.

"Because you need to have a freaking social life,

man. You've been wallowing since Katie broke up with
you and it's getting boring. Now get your ass up here
and meet people."

"I know lots of people," Matt countered.
Sam's words came clearer, the background noise of

the party fading as Sam presumably moved outside.
"You know lots of the same people that you've known
for years. Half of them are friends with Katie and
probably aren't even talking to you anymore."

Matt rubbed the bridge of his nose, knowing his

oldest friend was right. Just for the record, Matt added,
"And you know I'm not into parties."

Where You Least Expect It - 8

"Not into parties, not into bars. Whatever. I'm here,

you're here. Get up here."

Matt held back a sigh. "What apartment?"
Sam told him the number, adding, "Just follow the

noise, man."

At least Sam wasn't coming out to drag Matt from his

truck. Hell, at least Sam trusted Matt enough to drive
himself and not come up with a last-minute excuse; Matt
supposed that was a testament to their long-time
friendship.

Matt found the apartment easily enough, the sound of

music spilling through the closed door. He had to knock
twice before it was opened by a young blond guy with
spiky, bleached hair, who was clearly more concerned
with the conversation going on in the living room than
with Matt.

Matt was about to push his way in when the man

finally turned, eyes narrowing. It took Matt a minute to
recognize the biker who had tried to cut him off earlier.

The man crossed his arms. "Are you here to lecture

me about how to ride my bike in traffic?"

The anger that had dissipated on the drive over

bubbled up and Matt had to force himself not to mimic
the other man's stance. "I'm here for the party," Matt
said flatly.

The blond quirked his head, demeanor suddenly

changing from annoyance to curiosity. "You know
Paul?"

Matt frowned. "My buddy Sam knows him." Matt

scanned the room, wondering if he would find Sam or if
his friend had managed to disappear in the two minutes
it took Matt to get from the parking lot to the apartment.

"Oh, he's here somewhere," the blond answered,

making a sweeping gesture with a hand holding a pink
glass. No, Matt realized, the glass wasn't pink, the drink

Where You Least Expect It - 9

was.

"Matt!" Sam's voice carried over the noise, drawing

Matt's attention. Matt smiled in relief when he saw his
friend pushing through the crowd toward him.

"Hey, man. I told you to just follow the noise." Sam

clapped Matt on the shoulder, pulling him farther into
the apartment to the kitchen. Matt turned to say
something to the guy who let him in, but biker boy had
already disappeared back into the crowd.

And "crowd" was certainly an apt description. The

small apartment was packed with people standing and
sitting on almost every available surface. Just as he
expected, it was remarkably similar to every party Sam
had taken him to since they were barely old enough to
drink.

Sam headed directly for the keg and handed Matt one

of the ubiquitous red plastic cups. "Grab a beer. There's
some people I want you to meet."

Matt tossed him a glare before filling his cup,

knowing that Sam's words were code for "there's this
chick I want you to meet."

Christ, not again. It was going to be a long night.
He would kill Sam later.
Matt did the obligatory small talk, knowing he had no

intention of pursuing anything more, no matter how hot
the women Sam introduced him to were. He knew Sam
meant well, but he just wasn't in the market for one night
stands. Maybe he was picky, maybe he was old
fashioned, but there it was. And he could do just fine on
his own, thank you very much, regardless of what Sam
thought.

The woman wanted a Cosmo, so Matt found himself

at the makeshift bar, full beer in one hand and empty
martini glass in the other, staring at a dizzying array of
alcohol and mixer bottles.

Where You Least Expect It - 10

A sudden voice in his ear startled him. "So, I didn't

catch your name when you tried to run me over earlier."

Fuck. Matt turned around, prepared to defend

himself, but the other man didn't look nearly as angry as
Matt expected. "You mean when you almost ran into my
vehicle." Matt held out a hand. "Matt Halston."

The other man switched his drink to his left hand and

accepted Matt's offer. "Christian Flannery. You're not
one of those drivers who hates all bikers, are you?"

"As long as you're not one of those bikers who thinks

he owns the road." When he wasn't in the process of
almost running one down, Matt was generally tolerant of
bike riders.

"Oh, please, it's not like I want to get myself killed."

Christian skirted out of the way of someone trying to get
to the vodka. "But you totally didn't see me."

Christian was being too friendly for Matt to continue

arguing. "I might have been a little distracted. Sorry
about that." It was as close to an admission of guilt as
Matt planned to get.

It seemed to satisfy Christian. "I guess I can forgive

you, since I'm still in one piece and all. You looked a
little overwhelmed by the booze selection."

It took Matt a second to catch up to the quick change

of topic. "I know how to get beer out of a keg, not how
to mix drinks."

Christian laughed. "Lucky for you my sister's a

bartender. What do you need?"

"A Cosmo." Matt knew it started with vodka and was

pink, but that was as far as he got.

Christian took the empty martini glass from Matt's

hand and started grabbing bottles, making it look easy.

"Did you learn this from watching your sister?" Matt

asked, curious.

Christian finished up and handed Matt the glass.

Where You Least Expect It - 11

"Watching, reading the bartender's guide. I made her
teach me some basic stuff." Christian shrugged. "You
never know when you're going to have to help someone
get a drink for his girlfriend."

"Not my girlfriend," Matt answered automatically.

"Sam's trying to fix me up with his date's friend." Matt
wasn't sure why he'd added the latter; apparently, yelling
at a guy in the street helped break the ice.

"Ugh, I hate when my friends do that." Christian

rolled his eyes dramatically. "I can meet my own dates,
thank you very much."

Finally, someone who agreed with him. "That's what

I keep telling Sam, but he's a little too single-minded to
listen."

"Some people think everyone needs to be paired off,

even temporarily." Christian took a sip of his own drink.
"Not that I'm against pairing off, but I can handle a few
nights solo."

"I should have you tell that to Sam." Matt glanced

across the room to see if the man in question was still
there or had already disappeared with Kim. He realized
he was still holding the Cosmo and turned back to
Christian. "I should get this drink back."

"Cool. I'm glad I could help. See you around."

Christian smiled.

Matt watched Christian disappear back into the

crowd.

Where You Least Expect It - 12

Chapter Two

Aerosmith woke Matt bright and early Monday

morning. He lay in bed for a few minutes listening to
Steven Tyler beseech him to dream on and wondering
why Mondays always came so quickly. Not that he
hated his job or anything, but he wouldn't mind more
time away from his cubicle.

The DJ's voice cut into his musing and forced him to

roll out of bed. One of these days, he would get a new
alarm clock with the option of waking up to his own
CDs rather than the chatter of bland morning radio
shows.

Fortunately, he'd long ago sprung for the fancy coffee

maker with automatic turn-on, and a strong brew of
French roast was waiting for him in the kitchen. A quick
glance through the CNN and NPR websites provided his
morning dose of news, which was just more of the same
old, same old.

He didn't take long getting out of the house most

mornings. A fast shower -- a habit left over from the
service -- teeth cleaning and flossing, some gel to keep
his dark brown hair tame, and he was ready to make the
ten-minute drive to his office.

Traffic was light, many people still biking or

walking. Matt had tried biking to work a few times, but
he often ended up working late and he didn't like riding
home in the dark; it wasn't safe, as his own distracted
driving proved. That, and he absolutely hated getting
rained on, which would be unavoidable come winter.

He stopped at the café -- The Coffee Hut -- near his

office building for his usual cup of coffee; as always, the
place was packed with people in business suits waiting
in line and a handful of telecommuters sitting at tables

Where You Least Expect It - 13

with their laptops, coffees, and bagels.

Matt made polite conversation with the people he

recognized from work as the line edged forward. He was
staring at the pastry counter debating between pumpkin
bread and pumpkin scones when the barista caught his
attention.

"What can I get started for you this morning?" the

friendly male voice interrupted his thoughts.

Matt looked up, immediately encountering the spiky

blond hair and blue eyes that he'd seen at Saturday's
party. What was the guy's name?

Christian, his name tag read. He smiled at Matt.

"Hey. Fancy meeting you here. What can I get you?" he
repeated.

Matt couldn't remember seeing Christian working

here before. "Oh, hey. I almost didn't recognize you."
Matt ordered his usual twenty-ounce black coffee and a
pumpkin scone.

Christian was still smiling as he handed Matt the

pastry. "Have a good day, Matt."

Christian hurried off to help another customer before

Matt could respond. Autopilot kept him moving forward
to pay the cashier. As he stood with the crowd waiting
for his drink order, Matt glanced over and caught
Christian smiling at him. Matt smiled back, almost
missing it when his order was called.

Yanking his attention back to what he was doing,

Matt grabbed his coffee and headed to work,
immediately banishing Christian from his mind and
focusing on his projects for the day. He had several
deadlines coming up and if he didn't make some serious
headway this week, he would be working weekends.

***

Where You Least Expect It - 14

The week passed in a daze; Matt worked close to

sixty hours to get everything done and put out a few
fires along the way.

He hadn't seen Christian again, although, oddly, he

had noticed he wasn't seeing Christian. Matt wasn't one
to keep track of his close friends' schedules, let alone
one of the baristas at the coffee shop. Matt chalked his
sudden interest up to the unusual circumstances of their
meeting. Besides, Christian seemed like a nice enough
guy.

As much as he disliked doing so on principle, Matt

decided to head into work on Saturday after his game
with Sam to deal with the routine things that got pushed
aside during the week's crises. He stopped for his usual
coffee both out of habit and to avoid the poor excuse for
coffee in the break room.

Matt noticed Christian's blond head as soon as he got

close to the counter.

Christian looked up and smiled. "You're not working

on a Saturday, are you?"

Matt returned the smile, feeling only mildly off

balance. He still couldn't figure out why Christian kept
popping into his thoughts at the oddest moments. "We
had a crazy week and I wanted to try to clean off my
desk before Monday."

"Wow, that's dedicated. What can I get you?"

Christian picked up one of the pens they used to mark
cups.

Without thinking about it, Matt started making small

talk while Christian rang him up. "Have you worked
here long? I don't remember seeing you before last
week."

"I usually work in the afternoon or at night,

depending on my class schedule. I was only here
Monday morning to cover for someone who was sick."

Where You Least Expect It - 15

"Oh." Matt wasn't sure what to say next, his lack of

social graces rearing its head. He wondered how other
people made it seem so easy to strike up conversations
with strangers.

Christian seemed to be one of those people. "So, you

fled the party pretty quickly."

The change of subject caught Matt slightly

unprepared. "Yeah, I only went because Sam wouldn't
let up about it. Once he disappeared with his conquest of
the week, I decided to get out of there."

"No date with the Cosmo girl?" Christian teased.
"No, definitely not my type. Thanks for helping with

the drink, by the way. I was completely clueless."

"No problem; I'd lose my gay card if I couldn't make

a Cosmo." Christian smiled at him again and motioned
toward the pick-up area. "Your drink's ready."

"Cool. I'll, ah, see you around." Matt felt further off

kilter, like he'd been caught doing something he
shouldn't have been.

"Definitely. You should stop by some afternoon."

And did Christian just wink at him?

Matt found himself smiling back again -- how odd

was that? -- and actually considering it. "I might do
that."

Although it was another unseasonably warm day,

Matt wasn't the only person at work. He spent some time
cleaning up his desk and sorting through the things
needing to be filed, which admittedly wasn't much. Five
years in the military had taught him to stay organized
and avoid clutter. While he waited for his reports to run,
he rinsed out his skull and crossbones coffee mug and
cleaned the shelf where he kept his random collection of
die-cast model cars and the foam ball for the miniature
basketball net that hung on the wall of his cube.

It took Matt fewer than three hours to feel like he was

Where You Least Expect It - 16

ready for Monday, but it was long enough for the
weather to change drastically. The sky was dark gray
and the air felt charged, wind starting to pick up and toss
the fallen leaves around. He was typically more
prepared, but he hadn't bothered to bring a jacket with
him, wearing only a long-sleeved T-shirt, jeans, and
sneakers. Matt took a deep breath and hurried toward the
parking lot, hoping he could make it home before the
storm broke.

He was almost to his truck when light rain started to

fall. He could see Christian at the bike rack and had the
sudden urge to offer Christian a ride. Matt hesitated but
decided they were well enough acquainted that Matt
could share his dry truck. Besides, riding in the rain was
dangerous. Matt called out across the short distance to
grab Christian's attention as he retraced his steps.

Christian looked up, frowning for a second until he

recognized Matt. "Oh, hey. What's up?"

"The weather looks like shit, man. Do you want a

ride somewhere? We can put your bike in the back of
my truck."

Christian looked surprised. "I ride in the rain all the

time, but I guess I wouldn't turn down a ride. You're not
a serial killer or a stalker, are you?"

Matt laughed. "Nope. Apparently, I'm just a good

Samaritan today."

Christian returned his smile. "Okay, then. Where are

you parked?"

Matt pointed. "A couple of rows that way."
Christian finished unlocking his bike. "Cool. Let's

go."

Matt led the way to his truck, surprised at his own

actions. Offering a ride to someone he only knew as "a
guy who can make mixed drinks and coffee" was
something that had never occurred to him before.

Where You Least Expect It - 17

He dug his keys out and clicked the button to unlock

the doors. Lifting the tailgate, he turned to Christian to
ask if he needed help; if there was one thing he could do,
it was lift shit.

"You can grab the back. It's pretty light, actually, just

a little awkward and I don't like to toss it around. It's my
only transportation."

Once they got the bike situated and settled

themselves in the cab, Christian turned to him. "Thanks,
man. I appreciate this. It really does suck to ride in the
rain."

"No problem. I tried it a few times myself, but I hated

getting to work soaking wet. Made me feel like I needed
to start my morning over, you know?" Matt refrained
from mentioning the fact that he considered bike riding
in bad weather to be risky.

"Totally!" Christian agreed.
"So, where are we going?"
"I live right near downtown, kind of close to the

college." Christian gave him an address not far from
Matt's condo.

"Those orange stucco apartments, right?" Matt

looked over at him to confirm. "I live a couple of blocks
away in the condos on Albert."

"Oh, I know where those are. They look cute. Way

better than my building."

"Cute" wasn't exactly how Matt would describe them,

at least not his particular unit, but he let it go.

Christian didn't give him time to respond, anyway.

"So, what do you do besides show up at parties you hate
and give random guys rides home?"

"I work over at Elston and Downs, in the IT

department." Matt flicked on the defroster as the
windshield started to fog.

"Yeah? I was thinking about doing computers for

Where You Least Expect It - 18

school, but it sounds kind of boring. I decided to go with
history instead."

"You're in school?" Sometimes, Matt's struggle with

small talk appalled even him, but he thought he was
doing pretty well.

"Well, obviously." Christian's tone of voice was

teasing. "I'm a senior. I actually have a double major, so
it's taking a bit longer, but I should graduate next
spring."

Matt almost asked how old he was -- he didn't look

much more than twenty-one, which didn't seem too old
for a college senior; of course, Matt was judging based
on second-hand experiences.

Christian hardly took a break between sentences.

"Where did you go to school?"

Matt was glad Christian kept them from lapsing into

one of those incredibly uncomfortable silences that
usually caused Matt to want to get away.

"I didn't," he answered. "I joined the Army right after

high school and basically got all my training there."

That caused Christian to pause. "So, um. You did

computers in the Army?"

Matt nodded. "Telecommunications, networking, that

kind of thing."

"Like in those commercials?" Christian asked.
Matt knew exactly which commercials Christian was

referring to. "It wasn't nearly that glamorous, actually.
Mostly a lot like what I do now. Sit at a desk, make sure
things are running properly, fix them when they break,
get bitched at by people who think things should run
better than they actually do. That kind of thing."

"So, just like a regular job? I always thought it would

be different than that. More... I don't know." Christian
gestured with his hand as he tried to find the words.
"Dangerous, I guess."

Where You Least Expect It - 19

"Don't get me wrong, it was dangerous. But most of

what we do -- did -- was pretty routine, actually, unless
we got deployed." He shrugged. "Even that could get
monotonous."

"Did you? Get deployed, I mean?" Christian's interest

seemed genuine.

"Yep." Matt generally avoided this part. It was

enough that he knew what went in to coordinating teams
in combat or what responding to IEDs was like; there
was no reason to tell other people about it. He'd
encountered too many people who either wanted to
glorify his experience or vilify the military. Matt chose
to remain silent and let people think what they wanted.

Christian was polite enough that he didn't push. "But

you don't like to talk about it with strangers."

Matt snorted. "I don't like to talk about it with

friends."

"Gotcha." He changed the subject. "What do you do

when you're not working?"

Matt shrugged. "I don't know, the usual stuff people

do? Read, watch TV, play basketball with Sam."

"Go to parties you hate," Christian suggested.
Matt laughed. "Go to parties I hate."
They pulled up outside Christian's apartment and

Matt killed the engine so he could help Christian with
his bike. Given how quickly the rain had picked up, he
figured he'd made the right choice giving the kid a ride
home.

Christian shouldered his bike as Matt locked up the

tailgate. "Thanks again, Matt. I guess I'll see you
around."

"Yeah. Take care. Maybe I'll stop in for coffee

Monday afternoon," he added on impulse. It would be a
good way to break up his day, and he wouldn't mind
another opportunity to get to know Christian better. It

Where You Least Expect It - 20

wasn't often he met people he could connect with, after
all.

Where You Least Expect It - 21

Chapter Three

"I'm really sorry about the short notice, Matt," Alison

apologized for what Matt counted as the fourth time. In
addition to being Elston and Downs' Customer Service
Manager, she had also been a friend of Matt's and Sam's
since high school and had put in a good word for Matt
when he was looking for work after the military.

Matt shrugged; he was used to last minute, need it

done yesterday requests. "It's okay, really. I know you
didn't come up with this on your own. Like I said, it'll be
time consuming but not too difficult."

Alison's high-heeled shoes clicked loudly on the tiled

hallway floor. "I don't know why these last minute
projects surprise me anymore. Phil seems to come up
with a new one every month or so. His expectations are
completely unrealistic." She gestured with her coffee
cup for emphasis, hot liquid splashing over the rim.

Matt moved easily out of the way of her hand. "I

think your manager spends too much time trying to
justify his latest great idea and forgets the work takes
time."

Alison turned into an empty conference room. "And

you get the blame for his lack of planning."

Matt tried to assuage her concern. "Hey, I'm used to

it. Phil can bitch at me all he wants. He's not my boss."

"Try not to sound too happy about that." Alison

smiled wryly.

Matt laughed. "Sorry. What's our next step?"
They spent a few minutes planning before Alison

asked, "Still glad you traded your Army career for the
private sector?"

"You would be amazed at the similarities.

Bureaucracy and disconnect between the people making

Where You Least Expect It - 22

the decisions and the ones handling the actual work is
everywhere."

"You're always so encouraging." Alison stood up and

gathered her papers. "I'll make sure you're kept in the
loop, at least."

"Thanks." Matt followed Alison out of the conference

room. "I'll get you the preliminary requirements
tomorrow."

"You're a miracle worker." Alison waved as they

headed off in opposite directions.

It was going to be another long night. Realistically,

Matt could do much of what needed to be done
remotely, but he tried to keep his evening
telecommuting to a minimum. He had learned the hard
way that working from home in the evenings ate into his
gym time. On the other hand, it limited the amount of
time Matt got his ass kicked at pool by Sam, which
wasn't such a bad thing.

Late hours meant more coffee. Even though he

suspected Christian's suggestion to stop by in the
afternoon was an attempt to drum up business for The
Coffee Hut, a two-dollar drink sounded a lot better than
the sludge his company provided.

Sure enough, Christian was behind The Coffee Hut's

bar making over-priced flavored coffee drinks.

Christian looked up from wiping down the espresso

machine and smiled when he recognized Matt. "Ah, so
you fell for my devious attempt to increase our
afternoon business?"

Matt returned the smile. "I knew that's what you were

up to," he accused.

Christian gave him a contrite look. "I'll have to try to

be more subtle next time."

"I wouldn't think coffee would require a hard sell.

Anyway, I'm planning on working late and need the

Where You Least Expect It - 23

extra caffeine."

"That's too bad. About working late, I mean."

Christian kept chatting as he made Matt's drink. "Thanks
again for the ride Saturday. It really did save me a lot of
time."

"No problem. I was going the same way, anyway.

And it's not like we're complete strangers." Matt's
awkwardness faded the more they talked and he found
he was enjoying getting to know Christian, even if it
was in bits and pieces.

"Well, it was definitely cool of you. Not many people

are willing offer rides to their barista."

"I figured I owed you since you saved my ass Friday

night by making that drink." Matt pulled out his wallet
to pay and dropped a buck in the tip jar.

"Oh, I get it, so now we're even and I shouldn't

expect any more rides?" Christian put a sleeve on the
cup he had just finished filling and handed it over to
Matt with a flourish.

Matt laughed, both at Christian's words and his

display. "I don't know, maybe you'll catch me in a
generous mood."

Christian smiled sweetly. "I'll just have to hope

you're around the next time it's pouring rain."

Christian's smile drew an answering one from Matt

and left Matt with an oddly pleased feeling. "You'll just
have to hope your luck holds out. Thanks for the
coffee." Matt raised his cup in a salutary gesture.

"It's what we're here for!"

***

The project Matt and Alison were working on

continued to take up more of Matt's time as it grew in
complexity. Sometime around the third week of back-

Where You Least Expect It - 24

and-forth meetings with the vendor and Alison's boss,
Matt realized he should have expected it.

Long days punctuated by more unforeseen changes

and new demands from Phil found Matt visiting the
coffee shop more frequently during the afternoons.

"Back again?" Christian asked. "That's every day this

week. Did Phil change the requirements again?" He
grabbed a cup and poured Matt's drink.

Matt handed over a five and dropped some of the

cash in the tip jar. "No, just the deadline. And the
vendor's being slow setting up the reports."

Christian made a face in sympathy before turning to

Alison and ringing up the double tall, extra hot, two-
percent, one-pump vanilla latte she ordered. Matt wasn't
even sure what half of that meant.

"Sometimes I'm glad I sell coffee for a living."

Christian handed Alison her change. "Good luck with
your vendor."

"Thanks. Good luck with the afternoon rush," Matt

teased as a group of six or seven people entered through
the far door.

Christian rolled his eyes. "Thanks."
Alison was silent throughout their exchange and Matt

caught her watching him as they walked outside.
"What?"

"What do you mean, what? I've known you for ages

and I've never seen you all gabby like that." She pulled
her suit jacket around herself against the chill in the air.
"Are you actually starting to come out of your shell?"

Was he that unsocial that a few conversations

warranted notice? "I'm in there practically every day,
Alison." He didn't want to get into the whole story about
almost hitting Christian with his truck before
discovering that they shared common friends.

"You're carrying on full-blown conversations with

Where You Least Expect It - 25

that cute barista. You told him about Phil! You never do
that." Alison liked to talk in exclamation points when
she was excited. "What gives, Matthew?"

Matt held back his groan. "You sound like my

grandmother when you call me Matthew. And nothing
gives. Christian and I met at one of those parties Sam
likes to drag me to. And I do know how to be polite,
believe it or not."

"Polite, yes. But gabby?" Alison raised her eyebrows.
Matt was almost offended. "I am not gabby. And

contrary to my reputation, I'm not a complete asocial
hermit."

Alison made a noncommittal sound. "I'll keep that in

mind next time I need a date."

Great. "I bet you will. Let's just spend less time

psychoanalyzing me and try to get out of here on time
tonight."

"Matt, it's Friday. Some of us have dates." Alison

pulled open Elston & Down's lobby door.

"Oh, right. Dates," Matt replied sarcastically.
Alison looked like she might pat him on the head for

his cluelessness.

Four hours later, Matt left work before six for the

first time in weeks, the same time Christian ended his
shift.

"Hey!" Christian sounded cheerful, as always. "First

The Coffee Hut, now the parking lot."

Matt succeeded in summoning a smile. "Just get off

work?" he asked. Man, he needed to work on his
conversation skills.

Christian pushed his bike as he walked next to Matt.

"Yeah. I actually have a whole two days off, too. Pretty
sweet."

"A regular weekend when everyone else has

weekends? How did you swing that?" As difficult as his

Where You Least Expect It - 26

job could be sometimes, Matt was glad for the fairly
predictable routine.

Christian tilted his head, looking thoughtful. "My

innate charm?"

Matt laughed, feeling lighter than he had all day.

"You want a lift home?" The words were out before he
even realized he'd thought them.

"That would be awesome! I mean, are you sure it's

not a big deal? I hate to inconvenience you."

"Well, we're going the same way and I don't mind the

company, so nope, not a big deal."

"Excellent! You can just drop me off downtown,

though. I need to grab some food before heading home."

Matt nodded; downtown was even easier. "Sounds

good; just let me know where."

Matt helped Christian put the bike in the back of the

truck and they headed out through the leaf-strewn
streets. Fall had finally arrived -- with a vengeance. The
temperature had dropped, the winds had picked up
steadily, and the trees had shed most of their leaves in a
few days.

"God, I love this weather, don't you? It's so crisp and

the leaves are so pretty. Much better than winter. Fall
always feels so charged, and those days when it's still
warm are the best. I mean, look at the way the sunset
reflects off the yellow in those leaves; isn't it gorgeous?
Although I'd love to do the whole touristy thing in
Vermont where the leaves actually turn colors instead of
just going from green to yellow to dead."

Matt glanced over and watched Christian stare out

the window. He was reluctant to admit his own
utilitarian approach. "I don't pay that much attention to
the weather beyond how I should dress. Although I
guess I prefer spring and summer, once it's warmed up
and I don't have to carry a coat or worry about the rain

Where You Least Expect It - 27

as much."

Christian fidgeted in his seat, something of a feat

given the restraint of the seatbelt. "Oh, I like all the
seasons; they all have their own special things, you
know? Fresh snow in the winter, watching the flowers
and trees bloom in spring, really long summer nights,
even if they are chilly."

Matt thought about that for a minute. "I guess I never

really considered it that way. I was trained to be aware
of my surroundings and to consider how conditions can
affect things like transportation. When I was a kid, I
liked summer the best and thought snow was cool if
school got canceled." He shrugged. "Weird, huh? Maybe
that's why people think I'm sullen." He didn't realize he'd
said the last part out loud until Christian spoke again.

"Well, I certainly don't think it makes you defective if

you don't have a favorite season. I mean, it is just
weather, after all. I'm probably a little bit of a freak,
anyway."

"Nah, it just makes you interesting." And Matt meant

it; one of the things that drew him to Christian in spite of
the lack of obvious commonalities was Christian's
enthusiasm and curiosity. Like Sam and Alison,
Christian had a way of getting past Matt's shell and
wasn't put off by his gruff exterior.

"So, how was the rest of your day?" Christian asked.

"Oh, I love this song. Can I turn the radio up?"

Christian liked Judas Priest? "Sure." Matt tried to

hide his amusement.

"Just because I have Lady Gaga as my ring tone

doesn't mean I can't like Priest, too," Christian informed
him.

Matt laughed at the haughty expression on Christian's

face. "Okay, okay. It was just unexpected."

Christian settled back in his seat. "After six months

Where You Least Expect It - 28

with a roommate who listened to nothing but metal,
some of it grew on me. I played a lot of techno to drive
him crazy."

"A music war, huh?" Matt glanced over at Christian

as he drove into downtown proper. "Where do you want
me to take you?"

Christian shifted in his seat again. "You can just drop

me off on Main near the Thai place. I can lock my bike
up while I eat."

"You got it."
Matt found a spot a couple of doors away from the

restaurant and pulled in smoothly. "You want help with
your bike?"

Christian shook his head and unbuckled his seatbelt.

"I can get it." He put his hand on the door handle and
hesitated. "Um. Do you have plans? Do you want to
maybe grab some dinner? Unless you hate Thai food. Or
we could get something else. Unless you think it's weird
to have dinner with me." Christian paused briefly before
continuing. "Am I babbling? I tend to babble when I'm
nervous."

Matt was sure his surprise showed on his face. "I

actually don't have plans and I love Thai."

"Really? Cool." Christian started to open the door but

turned back toward Matt again. "You don't think I'm
some kind of crazy stalker, do you?"

Matt laughed. "No. Besides, I think I can handle

myself. Army, remember?"

Christian's face flushed. "Right. Army." Christian

jumped out of the truck and headed into the restaurant.

They were seated quickly and ordered drinks.

Christian picked up his menu, chewing on his lower lip
as he read.

Matt opened his menu as well; he knew what he was

ordering, but he needed something to focus on. "Do you

Where You Least Expect It - 29

want to split an appetizer?" he asked.

Christian glanced up at him. "Okay. Like what?"
This Matt could do; he could talk about menu items

and debate appetizers without feeling awkward and
having to search for words. Luckily, he and Christian
shared similar tastes, which made it easy to decide.

After the server took their orders and left their drinks,

they looked at each other for a minute.

"So--" They both started at once and laughed.

Christian looked embarrassed.

"Go ahead," Matt said.
"Oh. Um, okay. What was the last movie you saw?"

It seemed like Christian felt a little awkward as well.
Matt took a drink of his beer, relaxing, and answering
Christian's question.

Once they got started, they were able to keep the

conversation going without much difficulty. They
covered their favorite movies, books they had read
recently -- Christian's were mostly for school, Matt's
were bestseller thrillers, they both liked action and
horror movies.

Somewhere during the course of their dinner, one of

their early conversations flashed into Matt's head. "I'd
lose my gay card if I couldn't make a Cosmo." The fact
that Christian was openly gay hadn't been more than a
basic piece of information until now. Matt found himself
wondering if Christian was getting the wrong
impression. It was obvious that Matt was straight, wasn't
it?

"Matt? What's wrong?" Christian broke into his

thoughts.

Matt shook his head. "Um, nothing. Just thinking

about work," he lied. There was no way Christian could
have the impression that Matt was interested in anything
beyond friendship. "I'm sorry, I missed what you said."

Where You Least Expect It - 30

Christian looked mildly concerned but thankfully

didn't pursue Matt's distraction. The rest of the dinner
passed with relative ease, although with a bit more
conscious effort on Matt's part. He tried to hide his
discomfort behind eating and left as quickly as possible
without being rude.

Christian was a nice enough guy and Matt enjoyed

the company, but what did they have in common, really?
Matt was better off sticking to his usual routine.

***

Matt jerked awake, covered in sweat and still trying

to get away from the images in his dream. It was early --
too early for a Saturday -- but he knew from experience
he was unlikely to get back to sleep. This was the first
time the nightmares had returned in over a year. He
swore at himself for not managing his stress better and
got up to take a shower.

The hot water helped to relax him and wash away the

memories of IEDs exploding and the sounds of grown
men screaming in agony. His conscious mind could still
clearly remember all the details from that day, details he
didn't even realize he'd noticed at the time. He hadn't
been close enough to be injured himself, but he'd been
part of the response and cleanup.

By the time the water ran cold, the images had faded

but he was still feeling unsettled and unsure of the
dream's cause. Stress from work had never been a
trigger, which left his personal life. Matt had been too
busy to do much of anything lately; Sam had even taken
a break from the endless quest to get Matt laid. Sure,
dinner with Christian was out of the ordinary, but it was
just dinner.

Matt tossed his towel in the hamper and decided to

Where You Least Expect It - 31

see if this was one of the rare times when sleep wouldn't
elude him. The nightmare was obviously a fluke.

Where You Least Expect It - 32

Chapter Four

That night found Matt at another one of those too-

loud, too-many-people-he-didn't-know parties that Sam
always had lined up. Matt had been so busy lately, he
was actually looking forward to getting out of the house
for a change. Besides, it was Halloween weekend and
even Matt wasn't boring enough to stay home.

They arrived together, albeit in separate cars, sparing

Matt the initial moments of awkwardness as he tried to
find a familiar face in a crowd; there were several
people in costumes and some in standard jeans and T-
shirt attire. He used Sam as a shield as they made their
way through the crowd to the beer. Matt was relieved to
see he recognized several people and wouldn't have to
rely solely on Sam, who would inevitably wander off.

They took up a place near the drinks and chatted with

various people who came for refills. As usual, Sam did
most of the chatting while Matt tried to remind himself
to relax. At least he no longer stood in the "at ease"
position the Army had drilled into him.

Matt noticed Mindy and Sara across the room at the

same time Sam did, if the elbow in Matt's ribs was any
indication.

"There's Mindy," Sam practically yelled in Matt's ear

to be heard over the music.

"I see that," Matt shouted back. He knew what was

coming next.

"You should go talk to her." Sam nudged Matt's arm.
"Why?"
"Because she liked you." Matt was about to ask how

Sam could possibly know that when Sam continued,
"Sara told me when we had dinner. Come on, she's
nice."

Where You Least Expect It - 33

Matt opted for a deflection. "When did you have

dinner with Sara?"

The look Sam gave him let Matt know his attempt to

change the subject didn't pass unnoticed. Matt knew he'd
never be able to explain his aversion to one-night stands
to Sam. While Sam was happy to find a pretty face to
pass a few hours with, Matt wanted someone he could
be friends with.

Matt turned to grab another beer and promptly

collided with another person. "Sorry," he started to
apologize but was interrupted.

"Hey! Watch it -- oh, it's you," Christian said.
He was dressed in tight jeans with strategically

placed holes and a worn concert T-shirt; Matt didn't
recognize the band name. His blond hair was spiked
more than it was during the week and Matt thought
Christian wore a hint of eyeliner.

Matt felt off balance. He was glad he hadn't pissed

off a stranger, but he was uncomfortable given how he'd
acted the last time he'd seen Christian. What kind of
impression was he giving people, spending so much
time with the younger man?

Christian smiled brightly, seemingly oblivious to

Matt's discomfort. "I see Sam hasn't deserted you yet."

"No. Not so far, anyway." Matt tried to think of

something else to say but came up blank. Just because
he was straight and Christian was gay was no reason
they couldn't have a casual conversation at a party, he
told himself. It was ridiculous to think that everyone
would start assuming Matt was gay just based on whom
he talked to.

Sam's voice startled Matt. "Hey, I don't desert him. I

just get sidetracked. Besides, it's not like I don't do my
part to keep him entertained."

Matt snorted. "You have bizarre sense of what I find

Where You Least Expect It - 34

entertaining."

"You just need to relax, man." It was a common

refrain from Sam.

Matt raised an eyebrow. "Is that what they're calling

it now?"

Christian laughed. "You know, Sam, not every party

has to be a meat market."

"What? Meat market?" Sam feigned offense. "You

make it sound so crass. Group gatherings are part of the
traditional mating process. In fact --"

Matt cut him off. "Oh, no. No lectures on mating

rituals. I can watch that shit on the Discovery Channel,
which is probably where you heard that, anyway."

"Okay, man. Your loss." Sam turned to Christian.

"How's life in the coffee shop? Is he as much of a pain
in the ass as a customer?" Sam jerked his head toward
Matt.

Christian shrugged. "It's a job. And he's not too bad."
Christian and Sam proceeded to talk as if they knew

each other well. He remembered Christian mentioning
meeting Sam before, but there was still something
mildly unsettling about it.

A familiar laugh caught Matt's attention and he

realized Alison was here, as well. It was almost too
weird for Matt. Alison had already made it clear how
novel Matt making new friends was; how would she
react if she realized his new friend was not only
younger, but gay and out? He didn't have much time to
think about it before Alison made her way over to him.

"And I thought you were going to be a homebody all

weekend," she teased, leaning against the counter next to
Matt.

Matt took a swallow of his beer. "Sam can be

persuasive."

"I see, that's your way of saying 'Sam nagged me to

Where You Least Expect It - 35

come to another party.'" Alison pushed her auburn hair
behind her ear, her normally conservative style replaced
with a more relaxed, mussed look.

"You know, I'm not nearly as grouchy as the two of

you make me sound." He didn't give her the chance to
contradict him. "So, how was your date?"

"Ugh," Alison said with a mild shudder. "Sometimes

I wonder what people are thinking."

"This wasn't another guy from some dating website,

was it? Seriously, Al, when are you going to give up on
those?" Matt knew finding people to date was difficult --
for everyone except Sam -- but finding dates on the
Internet seemed too sketchy.

"Yes, it was a guy from a dating website. And don't

be so damn skeptical. I mean, look around this room."
She gestured with her glass; one of these days, she was
going to douse someone. "These options aren't much
better."

"Yeah, but at least you've seen these people before."

He held up a hand when Alison started to protest. "And
a few emails and IM conversations don't count. You
have no idea what kind of freaks you might meet."

"Thank you, Dad. I'll be sure to run a full background

check next time." She finished her drink. "Where's
Sam?"

Matt looked around and realized Christian had moved

to another group that Matt didn't recognize and Sam was
nowhere to be seen.

He shrugged. "Your guess is as good as mine. At

least I have my own car."

"He's such a player. I can't believe I dated him, even

if we were only sixteen. Come on, mingle with me."
Alison tugged on his sleeve and pulled him into the
party.

By the time Sam turned up, Matt was getting ready to

Where You Least Expect It - 36

leave.

"Dude, it's not even twelve-thirty!" Sam had a

reputation for being one of the last guests to leave a
party and always wanted Matt along with him,
something that hadn't changed in ten years.

"I know, I know, but I had a shitty week and I really

need to get some sleep." It was true enough, and last
night's broken sleep didn't help matters. "Call me
tomorrow and we can watch the game."

Sam was about to say something else when Alison

walked up and handed Matt his coat.

Matt caught Sam's raised eyebrow and clear look of

interest. "We are not leaving together."

Sam laughed at him. "Man, you are so paranoid. I

was just going to say hi to Alison."

"Hi, Sam." Alison kissed his cheek. "Bye, Sam."
Once out the front door, they were immediately hit

by a cold wind. Alison wrapped her coat tighter and
Matt wished he had worn something warmer. At least it
wasn't raining yet.

"Where are you parked?"
"I'm right there, actually, so don't worry about being

chivalrous." She winked.

"I just wanted to know if we were walking in the

same direction. I'll see you on Monday."

"Sadly, yes." Opening the car door, Alison pointed

behind Matt. "It looks like our barista could use a ride."

Matt turned around to see Christian walking out of

the alley with his bike. "Man, I can't imagine having a
bike as my only transportation." He waved good-bye to
Alison and walked over to Christian.

Apparently, Matt's good Samaritan was back. "Are

you okay to ride that thing?"

Christian looked up from struggling with his helmet

straps and frowned. "Are you asking if I'm too drunk to

Where You Least Expect It - 37

ride my bike?"

"I'm offering to drive you home." Matt tried to sound

friendly, but he thought he might have sounded
inexplicably annoyed.

"I'm fine." Christian's words were slightly slurred.
Matt knew Christian might think he was fine -- might

even be fine for the moment -- but Matt didn't think
Christian could make it all the way back to his
apartment. "Let me drive you home. You can't ride your
bike like this."

"Nah, I'm fine." Christian shook his head and

staggered slightly.

Matt placed a hand on the bike's handlebars. "You

can barely stand. Besides, it's freezing and the ride will
just make you colder." Matt cut off Christian's protest.
"Come on. My truck's warmer and safer. And I'm
sober."

Christian finally nodded his assent and Matt grabbed

the bike by the bar, carrying it with one hand while
keeping an eye on Christian. He was parked close and
Christian tagged along silently. Matt loaded the bike
easily before opening the passenger door.

Alison honked and waved as she drove past.
"Do you like her?" Christian asked suddenly, one

foot on the running board and half in the passenger seat.

"What?"
"That woman. Alison. Do you like her?"
Matt frowned, confused. Christian must have known

he and Alison were friends. "Sure. We've been friends
for a long time."

"No, I mean, do you like her, like her? Are you

sleeping with her?"

Matt's jaw clenched. "No. Not that it's any of your

business. Get in the truck, Christian."

Christian looked at him for another minute before

Where You Least Expect It - 38

settling in the passenger seat and allowing Matt to close
the door.

Christian was fumbling with the seatbelt when Matt

got in but brushed off Matt's attempt to help. "I can get
it."

Matt sighed, frustration leaking out as he grabbed the

strap. "Just let me help." When he looked up from
clicking the belt in place, Christian's face was inches
from his. Caught for a second, Matt stayed where he
was, returning Christian's gaze.

"I like you," Christian said suddenly, softly.
Matt blinked. "What?"
"I like you." Christian repeated. Matt felt Christian's

hand on his thigh, fingers just barely touching him. "A
lot."

Matt was frozen, unable to pull back and unable to

form the words to ask Christian what the hell he was
doing.

Christian leaned forward, eyes still locked with

Matt's until he was a breath away from Matt's lips. Matt
saw Christian shut his eyes, watched him close the scant
inch still between them, watched as Christian touched
his surprisingly warm lips to Matt's.

The shock holding Matt still wore off almost

instantly and he jerked back, defenses kicking in. "What
the fuck?"

Christian tried to follow Matt across the console but

was caught by the seatbelt. "What's wrong?" Christian
looked genuinely confused and Matt realized he was
probably too drunk to reason with.

"Just..." Matt was at a loss, more surprised than

angry. He put a hand on Christian's shoulder and pushed
the other man firmly back into the passenger seat.
"Look. I'm straight. You're really drunk and you need to
stop. I'm driving you home now."

Where You Least Expect It - 39

Christian was silent on the ride home, presumably

either too drunk or too embarrassed to say anything. It
was a marked contrast to Christian's usual up-beat
personality and Matt found himself missing the
talkativeness.

Matt didn't bother to look for a parking spot on the

street, instead pulling into Christian's parking lot. The
shorter distance Christian had to walk, the better.

He shut the engine off and turned to see Christian

fumbling with the seatbelt again. Matt rolled his eyes; at
least getting it off should be easier than getting it on and
he was glad he didn't have to help again.

Matt got out and made sure he was there to help in

case Christian fell out of the truck. The guy might be
pissing him off, but he didn't want to see Christian get
hurt and he certainly didn't want to have to deal with an
emergency room visit with a drunk college student.

Christian jumped down and leaned against Matt. At

first, Matt thought it was just for the support, but when
Christian looked up at him, Matt knew Christian had
other things in mind.

"Are you going to take me upstairs?" Matt had an

idea that Christian was trying to sound seductive, but
wasn't sure it would have come across that way even to
a receptive audience.

"I'll walk you to your apartment." He tried to sound

firm, but his voice was suddenly husky. "I need to get
your bike."

Christian grinned at him and Matt moved quickly to

get the bike out of the back, leaving Christian leaning
against the side of the truck for support. Once he had the
bike in hand, he motioned Christian toward the stairs.
Christian pushed away from the truck with a bit too
much force and stumbled against Matt. Matt's bulk kept
them upright; he swore under his breath as he grabbed

Where You Least Expect It - 40

Christian around the waist and tried to balance the bike
at the same time.

"Ooh, I love when you talk dirty."
Matt almost laughed, his earlier annoyance replaced

by the absurdity of the situation. "Come on, kid. Let's
get you inside before you pass out and I have to carry
you."

"Carry me!" Christian tried to throw himself at Matt.
"God damn it, walk! I can't carry you and the bike

and I'm not making two trips." Matt used the voice he
used to motivate his team in the Army and found that it
seemed to work almost as well on Christian as the
younger man moved quickly up the stairs. Standing in
front of Christian's apartment door, Matt put the bike
down and waited as Christian unlocked and opened the
door with a dramatic flourish.

Christian crossed the living room and flopped down

on the couch. "My hero."

Matt sighed again, standing the bike out of the way.

Christian could deal with it in the morning. "Are you
going to be okay? You should drink some water before
you pass out."

"'M good. What 'bout you?" Christian's speech was

becoming even more slurred.

"I'm fine. Unlike you, I can hold my alcohol. I'll get

you a glass of water." Matt searched through the kitchen
cabinets until he found a glass.

"I can hold my alcohol. Just didn't want to." Christian

sounded petulant.

When Matt came back from the kitchen area, he

found Christian actually pouting. "Drink this." Matt held
out the glass, but Christian didn't move. "Christian.
Drink the water so I can go home."

Christian reached for the glass and started sipping,

then suddenly downed the whole thing at once. "Um,

Where You Least Expect It - 41

good." He wiped his chin. "Can I have some more?"

Matt took the glass and went back to the kitchen.

"Jesus, are you always a high-maintenance drunk?"

"I'm not high maintenance!" Christian protested,

taking the second glass of water out of Matt's hand. "Just
thirsty."

Matt laughed. "Okay, fine. You're not high

maintenance. Look, are you going to be okay once I
leave? Do you have roommates or anything?"

Christian looked confused and frowned. "Um. Yeah.

He's not around."

"Will you be okay if I leave you alone? Christian?"

Matt was failing at being patient, but he was pretty sure
Christian didn't notice.

"You could stay." Christian looked up at him finally.

"I'd like it if you stayed."

Matt suddenly knew that Christian wasn't talking

about keeping vigil so that he didn't hurt himself in his
drunken state.

"I don't think so. You'll be fine. Go to sleep." Matt

kept his voice firm.

Matt stood there looking down at Christian, close

enough that Christian reached out and put his hands on
Matt's thighs.

"Don't go. You liked it when I kissed you."

Christian's thumbs rubbed along the inner seam of
Matt's jeans, slowly moving higher.

"Christian, stop." Matt's voice sounded strained even

to his own ears.

Christian's hands slid higher as he leaned forward and

ran his mouth over Matt's crotch, the move incredibly
erotic in spite of the circumstances.

Matt could feel the heat from Christian's breath

through the material of his jeans and boxers. He gasped
when Christian mouthed the head of his cock, hands

Where You Least Expect It - 42

continuing to move over Matt's hips and thighs.

Christian moaned softly and the sound made Matt

even harder than the feel of Christian's mouth.

"I don't want to stop," Christian muttered, continuing

to nuzzle at Matt as he moved his hands around to Matt's
ass. "God, you're so hot, Matt. Wanted to do this the first
time you drove me home. Want to suck your cock."
Christian looked up at Matt, eyes hot, as Christian's
restless hands moved to the waistband of Matt's jeans to
tug the button open.

Matt stared down as if mesmerized. Never in his life

had he imagined this, yet his balls were tight and his
cock was hard, pressing against his zipper, throbbing in
time with his pulse. Christian's hands felt good, strong
on his body. Matt felt lightheaded, dizzy. Christian
looked wanton, lips slightly parted and so, so close to
Matt's dick. Matt groaned as the tip of Christian's tongue
peeked out, suddenly imagining what Christian's mouth
would feel like.

"Going to make you feel good, Matt." Christian's

hand moved from Matt's now-open button to his zipper,
brushing against Matt's length. Matt groaned again and
thrust his hips involuntarily, pushing himself into
Christian's hand.

Christian grinned and pressed harder. "Oh, you like

that, don't you?" He rubbed his palm against Matt before
moving back to the zipper.

A noise outside and the sound of a key in the lock

brought Matt back to his senses. He jumped away from
Christian and refastened his pants.

The door opened to admit a guy around Christian's

age who Matt assumed was the roommate.

"You're home. I thought you were gone this

weekend." To Matt's ears, Christian's words sounded
accusatory and he felt his palms start to sweat at the

Where You Least Expect It - 43

possibility that they'd been caught. The roommate didn't
even look at him, however.

"Nah, we decided to wait 'til next weekend." He

tossed his keys on the counter and headed into one of
the bedrooms without further comment.

Christian blinked up at Matt and started to say

something.

"I've got to go." Matt cut off whatever Christian was

about to say. Ignoring the ache in his balls and cursing
himself for thinking with his dick, he fled as fast as he
could from the apartment and back to his truck.

Once home, Matt shed his clothes and crawled into

bed, determined to forget about what had just happened.
Almost happened, he reminded himself. Nothing had
happened.

Sleep proved elusive. Matt was usually good at

making his mind go completely blank, a trick that had
come in handy during his Army years; it allowed him to
focus and keep himself and his unit safe. There had been
plenty of times when he'd had to push his own fear aside
to make snap decisions without thinking about all the
different "what-ifs." He'd learned to quiet his thoughts
and forget about his personal concerns.

It wasn't working this time. As hard as he tried to

clear his thoughts, they kept coming back to Christian
and how far Matt would have let things go. He knew
some guys experimented but still married women, but he
didn't know if that meant they really weren't gay or if
they were closeted, and fuck, Matt wasn't going to spend
the night thinking about what made people gay. He
really didn't give a shit. He was straight and not attracted
to Christian.

Matt got up, grabbed a pair of sweats and headed to

the fridge for a beer. If he couldn't sleep, he could find a
better way to waste time.

Where You Least Expect It - 44

He flipped channels for a while, watched part of a

show on the History Channel, which he changed as soon
as the narrator started talking about the homosexuality
of some random Roman emperor.

Which brought his mind back to the image of

Christian opening his pants. He had finally managed to
distract himself, and now he was thinking about it again,
thinking about it enough that his cock was hard.

Matt ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.

Maybe if he jerked off, it would stop replaying in his
head. He grabbed another beer and rifled through his
porn stash for something to watch. Maybe Sam was
right; maybe he needed to get laid.

***

Matt woke Wednesday morning in a cold sweat, heart

pounding, breath coming in rough gasps. As usual, he
didn't remember much about the dream other than vague
images, the sounds of gun fire, and the sense of being
unable to move fast enough as sand pulled him down.
He could hear people shouting, some screaming in pain,
but he couldn't get to them.

Matt's stomach clenched at the combination of the

dream paralysis and the clear-as-day memories. He
knew if that had ever happened in real life, people might
have died.

This was the third night in a row. The nightmares

hadn't come this frequently since Matt had first
separated from the Army and was still learning to
manage his stress and settle into a new routine.

He was exhausted. Sam came over to watch the game

on Sunday and they had stayed up too late drinking.
Matt's dreams kept him from catching up on his sleep as
it became obvious that trying to pass them off as a fluke

Where You Least Expect It - 45

wasn't working. He was going to have to deal with them
sooner rather than later.

It was late enough -- early enough? -- that the

breakfast place would be open by the time Matt was
showered and dressed. He would get something to eat
and head into work early. He had enough to do between
his current projects and new regulatory changes that it
wouldn't raise too many eyebrows.

***

Christian's hand moved from the button on Matt's

jeans to the zipper, palm rubbing against the bulge and
making Matt groan. "Going to make you feel good,"
Christian said.

Christian looked up at Matt through heavy-lidded

eyes, lips slightly parted. He lowered Matt's zipper
slowly, eyes dilating as Matt's breath came faster.

Christian moved his other hand from Matt's ass,

lowering his eyes so that he could watch as he opened
Matt's jeans.

Matt's cock was throbbing and he could see the damp

spot forming on his boxers. Christian groaned and
pushed Matt's pants off his hips, mouth teasing Matt's
cock and hands running up and down Matt's thighs.

Christian reached into the waistband of Matt's boxers

and slowly pulled them down, freeing Matt's aching
erection. The sound of his own breathing was loud in
Matt's ears, matched by Christian's.

Matt moaned at the feel of Christian's tongue licking

a trail of wet heat up the length of Matt's cock. Christian
swirled his tongue over the head before slowly moving
down.

Matt watched Christian's lips stretch and cheeks

hollow as Christian sucked. Christian's hands moved

Where You Least Expect It - 46

randomly across Matt's ass, hips, balls. Matt couldn't
remember the last time he had felt anything this good.

His breath was coming in a series of gasps and

moans. He tangled his hands in Christian's short hair,
keeping Christian's head in place as he started thrusting
into Christian's mouth.

Christian moaned and opened further, taking Matt in

deep. Matt could feel the moan vibrate along his shaft
and felt himself getting closer.

Christian held him by the hips now, guiding his

movements. Christian swallowed and Matt felt his balls
pull tight, felt his orgasm tear through him as he shot
down Christian's throat. Christian kept swallowing as
Matt shouted.

Matt woke up thrusting against the sheets, cock still

rock hard, the image of Christian's mouth on him almost
unbearable. He was so fucking close.

He reached down with one hand and grabbed his

cock, squeezing hard and jerking, while cupping his
balls with the other hand. The dream was fresh enough
that he could feel Christian's mouth, feel the sucking as
he shot, come spilling across his hand.

Matt lay there panting, realizing that it had been ages

since he'd come so fast or so hard. He thought about the
dream, feeling hot again.

Jesus, he needed to get laid.

***

Matt felt refreshed for the first time all week. As

many wet dreams as he'd had in his life -- and he'd had
plenty -- they had never been that detailed.

Or about another guy.
He couldn't get the image of Christian sucking him

off out of his head. Every time he thought about it, he

Where You Least Expect It - 47

felt a corresponding twitch in his cock. By the end of the
day, he was starting to get sore and frustrated.

Walking by the coffee shop toward his truck, he

caught a brief glimpse of Christian laughing with one of
his coworkers. It was enough to make him hard, forcing
him to hurry to the truck before he embarrassed himself.

Stop thinking about it. It's just a coincidence. It

doesn't mean anything. What was wrong with him that
he was getting turned on by another guy? Matt forced
the thoughts down, refusing to think about what it might
mean for his sexuality and the image of himself he'd had
for years.

Matt managed to ignore his cock until after dinner.

Once his body realized there was nothing else to claim
Matt's attention, it started making demands, cock rising
to tent the front of his pajama pants. He flipped channels
for a bit, idly stroking himself before finding something
more adult to watch. He hated the stereotypical image of
the single guy sitting at home alone jerking off to porn,
but he enjoyed it anyway. Porn may be fake, but it was
better than picking up random women in bars.

He liked to watch from the beginning, letting the

anticipation build. He was still hard and could feel the
tightness in his balls as he rubbed the fabric of his
flannel pants lightly across his inner thigh. When the
actress took off her shirt, Matt moved his hand closer to
his balls.

Matt found his gaze caught by the actor's body. Matt

slid his pants down and reached for the hand lotion
stashed in the side table. He stroked himself slowly as
he watched the actress' hands slide over the man's chest
and shoulders, watched their tongues as they kissed.

He moved his free hand under his shirt and

unconsciously mimicked the path that the actress' hands
were taking over pecs and nipples. Pinching his own

Where You Least Expect It - 48

nipple made him moan and slide farther down on the
couch, legs spreading.

Matt watched as she went down on the actor,

fascinated by the sight of his waxed groin area,
wondered how smooth it was. Matt wanted to see him
shoot, but he knew it was too soon.

The male actor was moaning and encouraging the

woman as she sucked him off. The sounds -- moaning,
sighing, heavy breathing -- always went straight to
Matt's cock.

The scene changed suddenly to show the woman on

her back with the actor standing over her, thrusting his
hard cock into her.

Matt felt himself getting closer. His hips rocked,

pushing his shaft through his fist. He tightened his grip
slightly and increased his pace, moaning as his orgasm
tore through him.

As his breathing returned to normal and he refocused

on his surroundings, the scene on the television had
changed again. Matt watched a few more minutes as the
actor changed positions several times. Once his own
need had passed, however, Matt started to feel like too
much of a voyeur and turned the movie off.

His sleep was dreamless that night.

Where You Least Expect It - 49

Chapter Five

The dreamlessness didn't last. The nightmares

returned the next night, the sex dreams involving
Christian a few nights later. Sometimes, Matt was lucky
enough to get almost an entire night's sleep, but often he
woke much earlier.

After almost two weeks, the lack of sleep was

beginning to take its toll. He was able to stay focused
enough that his work didn't suffer, but he found himself
snapping at Alison about things out of her control. It
frustrated him that he took his moodiness out on his
friend but he convinced himself that a good night's sleep
would go a long way toward fixing things. He was
looking forward to relaxing during next week's
Thanksgiving break.

Matt's cell phone rang as he was leaving work Friday;

he wasn't surprised to see Sam's number and flipped the
phone open.

"What?"
"Jesus, you're cranky." Sam sounded only mildly

annoyed. "What the fuck's your problem?"

"Nothing. Sorry." Matt scrubbed a hand across his

eyes and tried to shake off his bad mood. "What's up?"

"What are you doing tonight?"
Fuck, Matt was too tired to deal with one of Sam's

parties. "I'm going home and watching a movie."

"Come down to Riley's." Riley's was their local pub,

a place that had been around for ages and tended to
attract a mix of young professionals and some of the
older college crowd.

It was a better suggestion than a party, but Matt

begged off anyway. "Not tonight, man. I'm too tired."
Matt waited for Sam's usual good-natured protest.

Where You Least Expect It - 50

Sam was silent for a moment. "Yeah, okay. I'll call

you tomorrow."

Matt closed the phone when Sam ended the call,

surprised to be let off so easily. Maybe his bad attitude
was finally taking its toll on their friendship. It was just
one more thing Matt didn't want to deal with right now.

Later that evening, Matt was loading his dishwasher

when the door buzzer sounded. He knew it was Sam.
Resigned to having to argue further, Matt clicked on the
intercom.

"Yeah?"
"Hey, it's me. Can I come up?" Sam's voice echoed

through the tinny speaker.

"Sure." Matt buzzed him in and made sure the

apartment door was unlocked.

Sam walked in a minute later. "Hey, man. I would

have used my key, but I wanted to make sure it was cool
to come up."

Matt was going to argue, tell Sam he was too tired to

be social, but shrugged instead. "Sure."

Sam frowned but didn't say anything. He pulled a six

pack out of the bag he was carrying, took two bottles
out, and put the rest in the fridge. He handed Matt an
open bottle and walked into the living room.

"What are we watching?" Sam dropped down onto

the couch and propped his feet up.

"I hadn't decided yet." Matt left his bottle on the

coffee table and crouched down to rifle through his
DVD collection. "Any preferences?"

Sam shrugged. "Dunno. Comedy? Action? Romantic

Comedy?"

Matt flipped him off at the suggestion of romantic

comedy. "You know the rule -- no chick flicks.
Comedy."

They argued good naturedly for a bit before deciding

Where You Least Expect It - 51

to watch Caddyshack for the millionth time. They could
both recite it verbatim, but that was part of the fun.

Once the movie was over and the six pack almost

finished, Sam brought up the very subject Matt had been
hoping to avoid. "So, tell me what's going on." The way
Sam said it, Matt knew it wasn't a casual question, but
decided to dodge the question.

"I've just been busy at work. That project I've been

working on with Alison is taking up a lot of time." It
wasn't a lie by any means, just not the whole truth. He
knew Sam meant well, but Matt wasn't ready to talk; he
was too conflicted over his reaction to Christian and all
of the questions it was forcing Matt to ask. He'd never
thought of himself as anything other than heterosexual;
he'd never allowed himself the opportunity to consider
an alternative.

"God damn it Matt, I've known you since you were,

what? Fifteen years old? You're having nightmares
again, aren't you?"

Matt's first instinct was to deny it, but this was Sam,

the one person who'd seen him through pretty much
everything. But he sure as hell wasn't going to mention
the other dreams. "Yeah. I am. They started a couple of
weeks ago. It's not a big deal."

Sam's expression turned from angry to concerned.

"Are you talking to anyone?"

Matt raised his eyebrow. "You mean other than you?"
Sam threw his hands up, obviously frustrated with

Matt's response. "Yes, other than me. You know, a
professional?"

Of course, Matt knew what Sam meant and he also

knew Sam was overreacting. He didn't blame Sam; with
so much misinformation and sensationalist Hollywood
depictions of veterans, Matt was accustomed to having
to clear up misconceptions even among those closest to

Where You Least Expect It - 52

him. "No. You know I went through all the assessments
already. It's a reaction to stress; it doesn't mean I'm
going to go all Rambo."

"Yeah, I know. I also know that you had a shitty year

when you first got back and I don't want you to go
through that again. What do you think caused them to
come back?"

Matt shrugged. Admitting he was confused by his

attraction to another man wasn't an option.

Sam ran a hand through his hair. "Look, I, uh, I did

some research." He looked sheepish. "I'm worried about
you."

"Oh, hell, Sam. Tell me you're not reading crazy

blogs; you know half of those people don't know what
they're talking about and the rest have an agenda. I'm not
going to do anything dangerous or stupid. I didn't last
time, either, and that was worse. And I've been through
the coaching on how to manage stress."

"I know, Matty." Sam took a drink of his beer. "Shit,

it just worries me and I can't do anything about it. And I
know you hate talking about it, but you know trying to
bury it just makes it worse."

Matt grudgingly acknowledged that Sam had a point.

"I'm not trying to bury it, and I'm not trying to be an ass,
Sam. I'm dealing with it."

Sam's smile was genuine, if a bit resigned. "Okay.

Look, you know you can call me if you need anything,
right?"

"Yeah, Sammy, I know." Matt couldn't stay annoyed;

he knew Sam was just worried about him.

"Okay. I'll lay off. What are you doing for

Thanksgiving?"

"Sleeping," Matt answered. "And not working."
"Mom's having a thing. You can always come over

for dinner."

Where You Least Expect It - 53

Matt was grateful for the offer, but he didn't want to

spend the day answering Sam's family's well-meaning
questions. "No, man, I need the vacation. Next time,
okay?"

"She's going to nag," Sam warned. "She hates the

idea of you being alone on the holidays."

"And I promise to be nice to her when she calls. Just

bring me leftovers on Friday. And don't eat all the
stuffing." Matt loved stuffing.

Sam laughed. "I can make no promises, dude."

Where You Least Expect It - 54

Chapter Six

Sam called on Tuesday to try one final time to

convince Matt to join him at his parents' house on
Thanksgiving. Matt begged off again but reminded Sam
to bring leftovers.

Matt hadn't been lying; he was fucking exhausted and

planned to use the long weekend to catch up on his
sleep. He was determined to just relax, watch movies,
and nap. He was getting through work by drinking too
much coffee and energy drinks.

Luck must have been with him; there were no last-

minute fires, no database crashes, no life-or-death
reports and he was able to leave work at a decent hour
on Wednesday.

He was surprised to run into Alison on the way to the

parking lot. "I thought you were leaving early?"

Alison made a face. "Don't remind me. I still have

three freaking pies to make for tomorrow but got stuck
running reports that no one will ever look at but can't
wait for."

Matt laughed. "Oh, I know all about that, trust me."
Alison looked at him in mock sympathy. "Poor,

abused IT guy."

"Hey!" Matt feigned outrage. "Do you know how

many hours I worked last week?"

She shook her head, reaching back to pull out the

pins keeping her hair back. "I don't want to know,
because if it was fewer than I did, I'll be pissed."

"Gee, thanks, Al. Go bake your damn pies."
She gave him a sideways look. "I bet you say that to

all the girls."

"Get out of here!" They both laughed as they parted

ways.

Where You Least Expect It - 55

Matt stretched before getting into his truck and

settling behind the wheel. Four days to do absolutely
nothing! Matt was truly looking forward to this
weekend.

***

He set his DVR to record the parade so he didn't have

to worry about getting up on time; being able to skip the
boring parts was also a plus.

He slept late, dreamless -- finally. Maybe all he

needed to do was relax and take some time off.

He decided to make a quick trip to the store to pick

up some deli turkey and cranberry sauce. Maybe he
wasn't having a full Thanksgiving dinner, but he could
have a reasonable facsimile.

He threw on some clothes and grabbed his jacket; it

wasn't quite raining, but who knew what it would do by
the time he got back.

Every time he thought about the weather, he thought

about Christian, the dreams, and the last time they saw
each other. Still not sure how to deal with his feelings,
Matt had decided the best approach was to simply ignore
them.

Fate, apparently, had ideas of its own.
Turning into the canned vegetable aisle, he stopped

short. There was Christian, looking at canned cranberry
sauce, as if Matt's thoughts had conjured the other man.

Christian grabbed a can and stood up, eyes widening

and face paling ever so slightly when he saw Matt.

They stood there staring at each other for what

seemed like an eternity, but was probably only a matter
of seconds.

"Hi," Matt finally managed.
"Hi." Christian smiled, looking nervous but hopeful

Where You Least Expect It - 56

at the same time.

Matt searched for something to say to break the

tension. "So, uh, did you get stuck with the last-minute
store run?"

"Huh?"
Matt motioned to the can Christian was holding.
"Oh, this." Christian held it up and looked at it

intently. "No. I just, well, I thought it would go well
with my frozen dinner."

Matt frowned. "Aren't you having Thanksgiving with

your parents?" Matt just assumed he was the only one
spending the holiday without family, even though
logically he knew that wasn't true. It didn't help to make
him feel any less alone.

Christian looked awkward, standing there staring at a

can of cranberry sauce, shuffling his feet and biting his
lower lip.

"No. I'm, well, I couldn't afford to go home and miss

work, so I'm here by myself." He looked up suddenly,
eyes wide. "God, tell me that didn't just sound as
pathetic as I think it did. It's no big deal, really. And I'm
sure you have a thing to get to, so I won't hold you up."

Christian turned to leave, but Matt surprised himself

by stopping him. Christian caused Matt to surprise
himself a lot lately, Matt noted absently.

"I don't have plans," Matt stated.
"What? Oh, I'm... are you having a frozen turkey

dinner, too?" That hopeful look Matt had become used
to was back, along with some curiosity.

"No. Turkey sandwich, actually." He held up his

basket. "I was just picking up some cranberry sauce to
go with it. Not that weird stuff shaped like the can,
though."

Christian frowned. "I like the stuff shaped like the

can."

Where You Least Expect It - 57

Matt smiled. "The stuff made with real cranberries is

better."

Christian diligently read the label on the can of

cranberry sauce he was holding. "This has real
cranberries. They've just been turned into a jelly." He
narrowed his eyes and looked at Matt closely. "Do you
have something against jelly?"

Matt laughed this time. "I have nothing against jelly.

But cranberry sauce at Thanksgiving calls for better than
just jelly."

Christian held the can closer. "This is what my mom

always buys. If you cut both ends off, it slides out and
retains the shape of the can."

"And you're okay with that?" Matt had always been

mildly fascinated by the cranberry sauce shaped like a
can phenomenon, but it also freaked him out.

Christian rolled his eyes. "Hello, it's jelly."
Matt laughed again. "Okay, I'll tell you what, I'll get a

can of good cranberry sauce and we can compare."

Christian cocked his head to the side. "Are you

inviting me over for Thanksgiving frozen dinner?"

"No, I'm inviting you over for Thanksgiving

sandwiches." Matt hid his embarrassment by bending
down and picking up a can of cranberry sauce made
with whole cranberries.

Standing up, he said, "I bet we can even find some

instant stuffing to go with the sandwiches."

Christian seemed to brighten. "Can we get instant

mashed potatoes, too? It'll almost be like a real
Thanksgiving if we do that!"

Matt smiled, feeling suddenly light.
Or maybe just lightheaded.
What the hell did he just do?
By the time they left the store, they had deli turkey,

instant stuffing, instant mashed potatoes, a can of green

Where You Least Expect It - 58

beans, two kinds of cranberry sauce, a pumpkin pie, two
kinds of whipped topping, beer, and snacks. Matt wasn't
sure when this had turned into a real holiday, but he was
feeling good enough about it to just be happy that he
wouldn't be alone.

Christian's bike was once again loaded into the back

of Matt's truck for the short drive to Matt's condo.

As they pulled into the parking garage, Christian

asked, "Is there someplace I should leave my bike?"

Matt glanced behind him. "It should be fine where it

is, or you can bring it up if you don't want to leave it
lying on its side."

Christian thought for a minute, chewing on his lower

lip again. "Is it okay if I bring it up? That way I'll have it
when I need it and don't need to deal with the lock."

Matt could see the logic in that. Having it handy gave

Christian an easy escape if he wanted to leave. "Sure. It
won't be in the way."

They managed to carry everything up in one trip, and

Matt hung up their coats.

"Nice place," Christian said as he looked around the

spacious living area.

It had been a while since Matt had someone new

visit. He took a look around, wondering how it appeared
to Christian. He'd bought the place using the money he'd
inherited from his parents' estate when he decided not to
reenlist in the Army. The beige wall-to-wall carpeting
was already installed and he hadn't gotten around to
painting the white walls, although he had a stack of
paint samples somewhere.

Most of the furniture was new. He had sprung for the

slightly more expensive microfiber sectional and
matching chair in a deep blue; the sectional and coffee
table took up most of the space in front of the
entertainment center. The king-sized bed in his bedroom

Where You Least Expect It - 59

was definitely an extravagance, but after spending so
much time in Army bunks, he wanted the extra space.
He had kept a few things from his parents' house,
including the bookcase and the desk he kept in the
second bedroom and the few paintings on the living
room walls.

"Thanks." Matt picked up one of the grocery bags --

he'd only gone out for cranberry sauce and turkey! -- and
gave Christian a quick tour. "It's a little bigger than I
need, but it gives me plenty of room for the big screen
TV and surround sound." Matt pointed to the left. "The
master bedroom and bath are through that door," he
pointed to the right, "and that hall on the right has a
spare bedroom and bath. The kitchen's through here."
The kitchen was directly to the right of the living room,
sharing a wall where Matt indicated the second
bedroom.

"Thanks for inviting me over." Christian followed

Matt into the kitchen. "I really wasn't looking forward to
spending Thanksgiving by myself."

"It's no problem." Matt put the last of the non-

perishable items on the counter. "I recorded the parade
from this morning if you want to watch before we make
dinner."

Christian positively beamed; Matt thought he might

have been bouncing. "You did! I don't have TV. That's
so cool. Can we watch?"

Matt found Christian's enthusiasm infectious. "Sure.

Grab the chips." Matt pulled a couple of beers from the
fridge and followed Christian to the couch.

"I haven't seen the parade in forever," Christian said,

taking a beer from Matt. "I love the floats."

Matt couldn't help but smile. Christian had to be the

most enthusiastic person he had ever met. "I like the
balloons," he admitted.

Where You Least Expect It - 60

Dinner was quick and easy; instant potatoes and

stuffing hardly took much time at all. Matt got that all
set up while Christian laid out the sandwich fixings and
cranberry sauce. They both laughed at the obscene
sound the cranberry jelly made as Christian slid it out of
the can.

Before Matt even realized it, they were sitting on the

couch, stuffed, watching football and waiting to digest
enough to eat dessert.

Christian shifted, suddenly seeming restless again.

He fidgeted but Matt didn't have a chance to ask him
what was wrong.

Christian turned to face him. "I. Look, I just wanted

to apologize for that night. It was, God, I think it's got to
be the stupidest thing I've ever done. I'm really sorry. I
get that you're straight and that you're not interested in
me, and I understand if you don't want to speak to me
ever again. But I like you. As a friend, I mean. I -- I
heard that you stopped coming in for coffee in the
morning, but I'm almost never there that early, and I
won't bother you again. I'm sorry."

Matt was a little stunned, a little taken aback. He

hadn't been expecting an apology. He was perfectly
content not talking about it until he figured out how he
really felt. He wasn't sure why Christian was bringing it
up now.

Matt took a deep breath. "I really don't know what to

say. I mean, shit. I'm obviously not mad at you. I was, at
first, but..." Matt didn't want to explain that he was more
confused than angry. "I was kind of hoping we could
just, I don't know, forget about it."

Christian was frowning and worrying his bottom lip

again in what was clearly a nervous habit. He looked at
Matt cautiously. "Does that mean you didn't invite me
over to poison me with that weird cranberry sauce?"

Where You Least Expect It - 61

Matt laughed, glad for the change of subject. "It's

way better than that can-shaped stuff!"

"I happen to like that can-shaped stuff!"
"Well, you're welcome to eat as much of it as you

like."

Christian looked inordinately pleased with himself. "I

think I will."

Matt laughed again and turned his attention back to

the game.

Christian curled up in the corner of the couch,

looking content as he hugged a pillow.

As football games went, it was pretty dull; low

scoring and slow moving as a result. It didn't help that
Matt didn't care about either team.

During the break between the third and fourth

quarters, Christian stretched and nudged Matt with his
foot.

"There was something about pie?"

Where You Least Expect It - 62

Chapter Seven

If he had any dreams Thursday night, Matt didn't

remember them. Mid-afternoon restlessness motivated
him to get out of the apartment Friday. He ran a few
errands and stopped by the local bookstore to pick up a
new thriller to read, but he was at loose ends for the rest
of the day.

He knew Christian was working. He'd enjoyed their

impromptu Thanksgiving celebration the day before; he
liked Christian's sense of humor and his enthusiasm. He
still thought his physical reaction to Christian was a
fluke, but the more he forced himself to face the fact that
there had been a definite reaction, the more he wondered
how much of a fluke it was.

Matt entered The Coffee Hut and was disappointed to

see Christian nowhere in sight. He placed his order with
one of Christian's very perky coworkers, who promptly
disappeared into the back as Matt waited for the other
barista to make his drink.

Christian came out of the back a moment later and

smiled at Matt. "Hey. How's your day off?"

Matt was surprised at how pleased he was to see

Christian. "Not bad; how's your day working?"

"Not that bad actually. It's been pretty slow this

afternoon." Of course, just as Christian said that, a large
group of people entered, talking and laughing loudly.

Matt picked up his drink. "Really? Have fun, then."
"Thanks." Christian rolled his eyes and hurried to

start taking orders.

Matt found a table near the window and settled in to

start his new book, glad he had arrived before the
afternoon rush.

Eventually, the crowd started to thin and the baristas

Where You Least Expect It - 63

began cleaning tables and putting the condiment bar
back in order. Matt looked up as Christian wiped the
tables nearby.

"What are you reading?" Christian asked and Matt

held up his book. "Oh, I read that a few months ago. It's
a great book."

"Yeah, I really like the way she's weaving all of the

characters together."

They chatted for a couple of minutes about the book

and what else they had read by the author. Matt asked
Christian what time his shift ended.

Christian looked at the wall clock. "In about forty-

five minutes."

Matt made a decision. "I could give you a ride."
Christian tilted his head as he considered Matt's offer.

"You wouldn't mind waiting?"

Matt shook his head. "I wouldn't have offered if I

minded. Besides, it's not like I have big plans today."

"No hot Friday night date with the Cosmo girl?"
"Oh, very funny. Don't you have work to do?"

***

Matt was absorbed in his book when Christian

dropped into the chair across from him; he noticed the
lack of Christian's apron and realized he'd lost track of
time.

He glanced at his watch. "Are you done already?"
"Yep." Christian stood and waved to his coworkers as

they left. "Are you in your usual spot?"

"Am I that predictable?" Matt asked as he led the way

across the lot.

"What? Oh." Christian looked embarrassed as he

shrugged. "You were in the same spot the two other
times you drove me home. I know a lot of people park in

Where You Least Expect It - 64

the same spots. At least you never have to think about
where your truck is parked."

"That's true." Matt unlocked the tailgate for

Christian's bike.

Once they were both settled, Matt started on the short

drive toward Christian's apartment. "You want to grab
something to eat?" They both had to eat, right?

"Um."
Matt waited as Christian seemed to think. Maybe this

was a bad idea. Maybe he should have just forgotten the
whole thing.

"If we can keep it cheap, yeah," Christian finally

answered.

Matt looked over at him. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah. I don't really have any food at home,

anyway." Christian looked mildly embarrassed again.

"Okay." Maybe it was a good idea. "How about

Mexican?"

"I love Mexican," Christian told him. "I eat refried

beans a lot, because they're cheap, and then I just end up
craving real Mexican."

Matt nodded. "Mexican it is, then."

***

"This is one of my favorite restaurants. I love the

cheesy decor and the little sombrero hats on the tables,"
Christian commented once the hostess had left.

"I come here every couple of weeks. I'm not a big fan

of cooking." Matt could make a few passable meals, but
it had never been his strong suit. He kept meaning to
learn but never seemed to get around to it. Restaurants
were just so much more convenient than planning meals
and he always seemed to be missing some critical
ingredient.

Where You Least Expect It - 65

"I actually like it, but I can't really afford to do

anything fancy and it's kind of a drag to cook for one
person. Sort of depressing, you know? I mean, if you put
all this time and thought into making something, there
should at least be someone to share it with." Christian
shrugged, blushing slightly.

Matt didn't want him to feel embarrassed. "I can see

that. I just don't really have the patience. There's usually
something else I'd rather be doing."

"Oooh, you want to split an order of nachos as an

appetizer?"

Matt blinked at the complete change of subject, then

laughed. "Sure. Jalapeños?"

"Definitely. Chicken or beef?"
"Either."
Once their orders were placed, they settled back with

their drinks. They had spent enough time together that
Matt didn't feel pressured by the need to make small
talk, but Christian jumped in before Matt could think of
anything to say.

Christian rested his arms on the table and leaned

forward. "So, I know you like football, read some of the
same books that I do, and spent time in the Army."

Matt took a sip of beer. "There's not much else to tell.

Work takes up a lot of my time, and when I'm not
working I just hang around my place, go to the gym,
play ball with Sam. Let myself get dragged to parties.
Fight off Sam's attempts to set me up."

"Which you obviously don't like."
Matt shrugged. "I was in a long-term relationship that

ended about a year ago. Sam thinks I'm missing out on
something by not dating a new woman every month."

"I only had one long-term relationship. It lasted a

couple of years before we split up. We were really
young." Christian grimaced. "Not that twenty-two is

Where You Least Expect It - 66

old."

Matt took a helping of nachos that the server left on

the table. "When I was twenty-two, I was just back from
being deployed and trying to decide if I should reenlist.
Katie, my ex, argued about that a lot."

Christian made a pleased sound as he took a mouthful

of nacho and toppings. "Did she want you to get out?"

"She did. She didn't really give a shit about the war

until I was in it and then she was totally against it. It
pissed me off, you know?" Matt always found it difficult
to explain his conflict with Katie; most people thought
she was just worried for him, but Matt didn't see it that
way.

"Because she wasn't supporting what you did?"

Christian asked.

Matt toyed with his beer bottle. "Partly, but it was

more that her reasons were completely selfish and not
because she thought it was the right thing to do. It was a
knee-jerk reaction."

"Well, sure," Christian agreed, "But you know there's

a huge psychological aspect to people's beliefs that have
nothing to do with reason or logic, right? As much as we
may be able to rationalize our opinions, there's still an
emotional component."

The server brought their food while they were

talking, causing a brief lull while they dug into their
dinner. The food was excellent and the selection of hot
sauces to choose from just added to the flavor.

"I know what you mean." Matt said, picking up the

conversation from where they had left off. "There was
more to it than that, obviously, but it felt like she didn't
respect what I was doing. She was waiting for me to get
done and decide to settle down. She wanted to get
married, buy a house, have kids. I felt like she thought I
was playing soldier, not doing something important."

Where You Least Expect It - 67

"Would you have stayed together if she had felt

differently about the war? If she had an opinion beyond
how it affected her?" Christian's eyes widened. "Oh,
wow, did that sound as obnoxious to you as it did to
me?"

"It's okay." Matt laughed and returned to their

original conversation. "I don't think I'd have felt
differently. I don't mean to sound like an ass, but we
were just looking for different things, you know? She
hated the giant TV and stereo system." Matt added,
remembering the fights they had about his spending
habits.

Christian nodded. "Maybe we should talk about

something besides our exes."

"You might be right about that." Matt smiled to try to

take the sting out of his words. "I actually don't like
talking about it that much."

"God, I'm sorry. I'm just a dork." Christian made an

embarrassed grimace.

"It's no big deal." Matt switched to a neutral topic.

"Tell me about your classes."

"Okay." Christian ate a few more bites before

continuing. "I'm a dual major in History and Journalism,
but I think I told you that. I'm kind of fascinated by how
people can be compelled to follow political movements
that have no value to them personally."

Matt thought he knew what Christian meant,

although it wasn't something he thought about much
himself. "You mean like poor people voting for
corporate tax cuts?"

"Exactly! It seems completely counterintuitive, but

it's based on emotional and psychological needs. People
look to something outside of themselves to provide a
sense of stability and immutability that they can hold on
to when things are uncertain. It benefits them

Where You Least Expect It - 68

psychologically, but not economically or socially."
Christian stopped and chewed his bottom lip. "Tell me if
I'm boring you. It's easy to forget sometimes that other
people don't share my level of obsession. Trent, my
roommate, has to listen to a lot of this."

Matt smiled, enjoying Christian's enthusiasm and the

easy conversation. "It's not boring. Do you know what
you're going to do when you're done?"

"My plan is to go into journalism -- not that fluffy

news casting crap, but real investigative journalism. I
probably need my Master's degree in order to really get
into it and get as far as I want." Christian paused again.
"Do you think I'm a freak? Most of the people I'm in
school with do. And I keep talking about myself so that
must kind of be boring for you."

Matt found himself laughing again, amused by the

look on Christian's face, like he must think Matt thought
he was a total weirdo. "No, I don't think you're a freak. I
think it's kind of cool that you know what you want to
do."

"Yeah, but you already have a job," Christian pointed

out.

"True, but I joined the Army when I was eighteen

because I didn't know what I wanted to do. They, well,
and my test scores, decided that I would be best working
with computers and telecommunications, so I just sort of
fell into it."

"So, it's not what you want to do?" Christian

frowned.

"I don't dislike it and I'm good at it," Matt explained.

"I don't always like the hours, but other than that, it's not
bad."

They both declined the server's offer of dessert and

settled the check quickly, heading back into the cool fall
weather.

Where You Least Expect It - 69

Sometime during dinner, Matt's mind wandered to

the dreams he had been having about Christian and his
body started to remind him, rather insistently, that his
recent bout of celibacy was getting to be a nuisance. He
wasn't ready for the evening to end, so he said the first
convenient thing that came into his head.

"So, I have this leftover pie."
Christian grinned at him from the passenger seat. "Do

you? You going to go back to your condo and have
some dessert?"

Jesus, was he that obvious or was he reading into

Christian's response? "I was thinking about it, but it's
kind of a lot for just me. You wouldn't be interested in
any, would you?" And was he actually flirting back?

"I do like me some pumpkin pie. You sure there's

enough for both of us?"

"Well, except for the piece I had for lunch, there's

still about half left, so I think there's enough to share."

"Cool. I accept."
Matt was at once relieved and anxious. He knew he

wasn't going to stop things if they went the way he
hoped they would. He forced himself to focus on the
road and not think about the growing heat in his groin,
or the warring voices in his head. Just because Matt was
horny was no reason to assume Christian was going to
do anything more than eat a slice of pie and leave.

Preoccupied as he was, Matt managed to get them to

his condo in one piece. They brought Christian's bike up
and parked it in the same place it had been yesterday.

"Can I help?" Christian asked as he followed Matt

into the kitchen.

"Grab some plates out of the cabinet." Matt motioned

to the cabinet next to the sink as he took the pie and
whipped cream out of the fridge. "Beer?"

"Sure."

Where You Least Expect It - 70

When Matt turned back suddenly to grab a napkin, he

almost collided with Christian. He was acutely aware of
how very close they were standing.

"Sorry," Matt said, stepping around Christian to pick

up the napkins he'd forgotten. He handed one to
Christian as they settled on opposite ends of the couch.

Matt picked the remote up out of habit. "I don't mean

to be a shitty host. Let me know if there's anything you
want to watch."

Christian shrugged. "I'll watch whatever's on. I don't

have TV, so I don't get to watch much."

"I, ah, I was planning on watching Top Chef. Do you

mind?"

"Oh, is it the new season already?"
Matt smiled, vaguely relieved that Christian didn't

laugh at him for watching reality TV. "It is. Have you
watched it?"

"Only last season. My roommate was kind of

obsessed with it and downloaded it. It was a fun way to
procrastinate."

"Cool." Matt switched to the DVR and started the

first episode.

They watched mostly in silence, commenting

occasionally on the new cast and the judges. Matt had
gotten them each another beer and Christian had
eventually migrated from his corner of the couch to sit
closer to Matt.

Matt noticed Christian starting to fidget. "Hey. You

okay? You look kind of stressed."

"What?" Christian jumped. "I do? Oh. I." Matt

watched as Christian emptied his beer and stood. "I
should go. I need to go. I have to study and stuff."

Matt was only half listening. When Christian stood,

Matt was suddenly eye-level with Christian's very
obvious erection. At least he had his answer about

Where You Least Expect It - 71

whether or not Christian was still interested.

Matt looked up. He didn't really want Christian to

leave. "Do you want to know why I stopped coming in
for coffee?" Matt asked.

Christian shook his head. He looked nervous, which

Matt found ironic. Matt was the straight one, wasn't he?

"Why?" Christian finally asked.
Was he really going to do this? "Because I couldn't

stop thinking about you, about what happened when I
drove you home from that party. I." Matt took a breath;
in for a penny, as they say. "That's why I invited you
over."

Christian's expression was more relief than surprise.

"Really? Would you think it was terrible of me if I told
you that's why I said yes?"

"No." Matt watched Christian's gaze follow his hand

as he adjusted himself. He rubbed his hand over his
erection, the anticipation becoming almost too much.

Christian bit his lip and pulled his gaze up to meet

Matt's, blue eyes intrigued. "No?"

It took Matt a minute to remember what they had

been talking about. "No." At least this time, he had a
reason for his inability to carry on a conversation. "I
keep wondering what would have happened if your
roommate hadn't come home." Matt lowered his eyes; he
could see the outline of Christian's erection pushing
against the zipper and his own cock throbbed in
response.

Christian dropped to his knees and placed his hands

lightly on Matt's jean-clad thighs. "I want to suck you."

Matt moaned and spread his thighs wider to give

Christian better access.

Christian edged forward, sliding his hands slowly up

Matt's thighs, thumbs rubbing along the inner seams of
Matt's jeans. He followed with his mouth, kissing his

Where You Least Expect It - 72

way up toward Matt's bulge. Christian's hand briefly
cupped Matt's erection before reaching higher to push
Matt's shirt up.

"So hot. I knew you'd have a perfect six pack."

Christian leaned forward so he could run his tongue
along the outlines of Matt's muscles.

"Oh, fuck." Matt wasn't sure what he had expected

and certainly hadn't anticipated how good just this little
bit of contact would feel.

Matt flexed for Christian, resulting in a sound

somewhere between a laugh and a moan. Christian
nuzzled into Matt's stomach, kissing and nipping along
Matt's waistband. Christian looked up at Matt as he
opened the button and zipper on Matt's jeans, slowly
spreading them open and sliding his hands to the edge of
the waistband.

"Can I take these off?"
Matt licked his lips and nodded, raising his hips

enough for Christian to strip him. Christian teased along
Matt's legs and placed light sucking kisses on the
sensitive insides of Matt's thighs.

When Matt felt Christian's lips and tongue playing

with his balls and sucking gently, he groaned and
dropped his head back against the couch. "Fuck, that
feels good."

Christian's hands were still touching Matt, roaming

over his thighs, hips, chest. Matt felt Christian's tongue
on his erection and looked down to see Christian licking
up the side of his cock and along the edge of the head.

Christian opened his eyes as he licked sensuously

around the head, catching a drop of precome.

"Does that feel good?" Christian licked again, making

Matt's cock glisten. "Does it make you hot?" Matt could
feel Christian's breath as he spoke.

"Oh, fuck, yes." Matt's heart was pounding and his

Where You Least Expect It - 73

whole body was tense. "Please, Chris. Suck me."

Matt wanted Christian to swallow him, but Christian

kept teasing, sucking and licking until finally taking
Matt in slowly. Matt made a sound embarrassingly like a
whimper as he felt himself engulfed.

Matt brought his hand up and ran his fingers through

Christian's hair as he started gently grinding his hips.
When Christian moaned instead of moving away, Matt
thrust harder, letting the sensations overwhelm him.

"Oh, God." Matt looked down and saw Christian's

hand working between his own legs. "Oh, fuck, fuck, are
you..." Matt trailed off and Christian stopped sucking
long enough to show Matt what he was doing.

Christian leaned back and Matt could see Christian

jerking himself. "I've wanted to taste you for weeks. I
get hard just thinking about it. I went home and jerked
off last night thinking about sucking you."

"Do it, please, don't stop. I need to come."
Matt moaned as Christian swallowed him again,

sucking harder.

Words kept pouring from Matt as he thrust into

Christian's mouth. He cock was throbbing and his balls
ached. He was so close.

Matt shouted as he came, shooting into Christian's

mouth. Christian's moan vibrated along Matt's cock as
Christian continued sucking and swallowing. Matt
released his grip on Christian's hair as he started to
soften. After one final lick, Christian leaned back and
stroked himself. Shit, Matt had just let another guy suck
him off and now he was watching that guy jerk off. Matt
wasn't sure what to do next. It was odd -- and oddly hot -
- to watch Christian bring himself off with a strangled
moan.

They sat there breathing hard and staring at each

other until Christian bit his lower lip and asked, "Um, do

Where You Least Expect It - 74

you have a towel?"

Matt blinked and let out a shaky laugh. "Sure." He

stood up and put his pants back on, only feeling mildly
self-conscious. He made a quick detour through his
bedroom after getting a towel.

"I thought you might want a fresh shirt." Matt handed

Christian a worn ARMY sweatshirt. "It'll be big on you,
but it's warm."

"Oh, that would be awesome. Way better than a damp

T-shirt." Christian stripped off his shirt and exchanged it
for Matt's sweatshirt. Matt tried to be casual about
stealing a look at Christian's chest. He wasn't nearly as
well-defined as Matt, or even Sam, but Matt could see
muscles flex under Christian's pale skin.

Christian folded the T-shirt up and finally looked at

Matt again. "We're good, right? I mean, I really do like
hanging out with you." He smiled slightly. "And not just
because you have cable and beer."

Matt nodded, still feeling awkward and not ready to

think too much about what just happened. "Here I
thought you were using me for Top Chef."

"Well, I'm not saying I'd turn you down if you invited

me over to watch the next episode. Not that I'm trying to
get you to invite me. I mean --"

Matt laughed and cut off Christian's babble. "Are you

always this neurotic?"

"I am not neurotic!" Christian was mildly indignant at

the suggestion. "I just don't want you to think I'm
pushy." He frowned. "You don't, do you?" Christian
asked and rolled his eyes. "Fine, maybe I'm neurotic."

Matt laughed again. "No, I don't think you're pushy. I

kind of like hanging out with you, too." Matt would
have to think about the rest of it later.

Christian smiled. "Okay, good. So, I should probably

go. It's getting late and I've still got studying to do."

Where You Least Expect It - 75

"Come on, I'll drive you." Matt stepped around

Christian, his hand almost reaching out to touch.

"Oh, you don't have to. I really don't mind riding."
Matt didn't like the idea of Christian riding his bike at

night. "Are you sure? It's dark."

"I have lights and stuff. I do it all the time." Christian

looked at the dishes on the coffee table. "Do you want
help cleaning up?"

"Nah, it'll give me something to do tomorrow."
"Okay." Matt watched as Christian gathered his

things and got his bike. "Thanks for the pie."

"Um. Yeah." What was he supposed to say? "Thanks

for hanging out." Fuck, that was weak, but, "Thanks for
the blow job" didn't sound any better.

"Bye." Christian smiled again as he walked into the

hallway.

"See you." Matt closed the door behind him,

suppressing the unaccustomed urge to watch as
Christian walked away.

***

Matt dropped down on the couch, wondering what in

the hell he had just done. He had intentionally made a
point of spending time with Christian to get off. Even
now, he was having difficulty admitting that Christian
was a bigger factor than the easy orgasm. He'd never
done anything remotely like that; even when other guys
in high school and junior high talked about who had the
bigger dick, he had been too shy to get involved.

He could convince himself -- if he tried -- that the

dreams were just frustration and Thanksgiving dinner
had been out of pity.

But that was without a doubt the best blow job he'd

ever had. Christian had been at least as into it as he had

Where You Least Expect It - 76

been and hadn't backed off at all when Matt started to
get aggressive. Hell, it hadn't taken much for Christian
to get off, either.

The more Matt thought about it, the closer he was to

getting it up again.

The phone rang, distracting him from his fantasy.

Matt readily agreed to Sam's invitation to play pool at
Riley's, glad for the distraction.

Where You Least Expect It - 77

Chapter Eight

Matt's next week at work seemed like the busiest yet.

He was only able to escape one afternoon when Alison
needed to vent about their never-ending project. The line
at The Coffee Hut was short; Matt watched the two
female baristas work the register and bar easily, half-
listening to Alison.

Maybe Christian was in the back. Matt placed his

order and waited by the pick-up counter, shifting his
weight impatiently. He couldn't stay away from his desk
for long.

"Hello?" Alison waved her hand in front of his face.

"Where'd you go?"

"What? I'm right here, Al." Matt hadn't realized he

was so distracted.

"Could've fooled me. How's Christian?"
Matt was completely thrown by the non-sequitur. His

pulse sped up. "What?"

Alison looked at him curiously, lips pursed in

thought. Finally, she shrugged just as their drinks were
ready. "Just curious."

Matt stepped forward and grabbed their drinks. "We

should get back." He walked quickly to the exit; he
missed seeing Christian, but he didn't want to answer
questions from Alison.

Nor did Matt want Christian to think Matt was trying

to avoid him, but Matt had no good reason to try to get
in touch with him, either. Besides, other than The Coffee
Hut, Matt had no way to reach Christian. It was an odd
situation, and it reinforced Matt's reasons for avoiding
Sam's attempts to get him laid; Matt had never quite
figured out how to deal with the whole "morning after"
issue.

Where You Least Expect It - 78

It wasn't until Matt was dragging himself to his car

Friday night that he finally saw Christian.

"Hey!" Matt called out, too tired to try to move any

faster.

Christian turned from the bike rack and smiled,

waiting for Matt to get closer. "Hey. You look tired."

"It was a long fucking week. I stopped in on

Wednesday but you weren't there."

Christian made a face. "I had an exam."
"Which you don't look happy about."
Christian finished unlocking his bike. "I think I did

okay, but it was an essay test and those are exhausting. I
just want to crash after, you know?"

Matt shrugged. "I never did school, but I can relate to

the exhausting part. Sounds pretty much like how I feel
after weeks like this."

"Well, I'd rather do school than the Army." Christian

looked at him, quick to add, "No offense."

"None taken. It's definitely not for everyone. I knew

guys who went in because they thought it would be cool
and glamorous. It was probably toughest on them."

Christian was still watching him. "But I get the

feeling you liked it because it was difficult."

"Like I said, it's not for everyone and I've learned not

to expect people to understand why I went in, but I liked
the challenge."

"Hmm." Christian tilted his head, looking at Matt

thoughtfully. "You can tell me about it over dinner. I
assume you haven't eaten. Unless you have plans, in
which case, forget I said anything."

Matt smiled as Christian bit his lip to stop the flow of

words.

"No plans," Matt answered. "Grab your bike. Where

do you want to go?"

They settled on pizza, but found themselves in a very

Where You Least Expect It - 79

loud and crowded restaurant filled with a bunch of little
kids running around celebrating what was obviously a
birthday. Christian appeared unfazed, but Matt was
definitely out of his element.

"If we get it to go, we can go back to the condo and

watch the next episode of Top Chef." Matt said.

Christian looked at him and Matt could swear he was

trying not to laugh.

"Too noisy for you?" Christian asked.
Matt jumped out of the way of a charging little boy

brandishing some kind of balloon animal.

This time, Christian did laugh. "I could probably be

convinced to come and watch Top Chef," he responded
to Matt's earlier suggestion.

They stood as out of the way as possible as they

waited for their order, watching parents try to keep their
rambunctious kids out of the way of servers and other
patrons. Their food was ready surprisingly quickly and
Matt hurried them out to the truck.

"Sorry, man," Matt said once they were driving to the

condo. "Too many little kids give me a headache."

"No worries. They were pretty boisterous. Plus, I bet

there's beer at your place."

It was a short drive between the restaurant and Matt's

condo. Once they were settled with beer and pizza, Matt
forced himself to focus on pizza and Top Chef --
anything to avoid the vague sense of awkwardness he
felt. Convincing himself that he wasn't attracted to
Christian was useless. He found himself thinking about
Christian at the most inopportune moments, getting hard
and aching in the middle of the day and jerking off
almost as soon as he got home. He wondered if he
should give in to Sam's attempts to set him up, but that
idea didn't hold much appeal.

Three beers later, they found themselves flipping

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channels and sprawling next to each other on the couch.
Christian's sudden laughter made Matt realized he'd
been lost in his thoughts again. Matt watched as
Christian giggled, but looked away quickly when he was
caught.

"Does it really bother you that much?" Christian

asked suddenly.

Matt frowned, confused. "Does what bother me?"
"That I'm gay. That we fooled around. That I'm

attracted to you."

"I don't want to talk about it." Matt turned resolutely

back to the TV.

He thought Christian was going to let it drop, but

instead he felt Christian's hand on his thigh. "You
shouldn't feel uncomfortable."

Matt tensed, entire body suddenly going hot. "I never

said I did."

"Then what's the problem?" Christian moved closer.

"I know you liked it when I sucked you off."

"There's no problem. Move your hand." He sounded

pissed. At least he thought he sounded pissed. He knew
he wanted to sound pissed. And he purposefully ignored
what Christian said about Matt liking the blow job.

"Where do you want me to move it? Here?" Christian

actually moved his hand up Matt's thigh.

God. "Stop."
"Matt." Christian leaned even closer, close enough to

brush his lips across Matt's jaw. "Do you really want me
to stop?"

The hot brush of Christian's breath against his neck

made Matt groan. He could have sworn he felt Christian
smile.

"It doesn't sound like you want me to stop." Another

kiss, this time closer to his neck. "It sounds like you
want me to keep going."

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Christian's hand was still on Matt's thigh, fingers

gently rubbing. Matt felt Christian's tongue on his neck
as Christian left wet kisses.

Matt swallowed, managing to suppress the moan that

was trying to escape. "I said stop."

"I really don't want to." The words were mumbled

against Matt's skin.

Matt turned to look at Christian and suddenly felt

caught. When he saw Christian's tongue snake out, Matt
did moan, remembering what Christian's tongue felt like
on his cock.

Christian leaned up and kissed Matt, gently at first,

lips barely brushing his. After a moment the kiss became
harder, more insistent as Christian leaned into him.

Matt couldn't stop himself. He leaned into the kiss,

gasping at the sensation of Christian's lips parting and
tongue tracing Matt's lips.

Matt gave in and pulled Christian more fully against

him, wrapping his arms tightly around Christian as he
stroked Christian's tongue with his own. Christian kissed
him back just as hard, never once complaining about the
pressure or the scrape of stubble on his cheeks.

Christian's hand was still firmly on Matt's thigh, but

his free hand moved up to tangle in Matt's hair, not hard
enough to hurt but definitely hard enough for Matt to
feel it.

Matt dug his fingers into Christian's side, feeling hard

muscles under warm skin. He moved his hands over
Christian's chest and stomach, making Christian moan
into their kiss and pull harder on Matt's hair.

Matt's cock was hard as stone, pressing against his

zipper and pulsing in time with his heartbeat. Matt
started to move, trying to get more contact.

The sound of the door buzzer made them jump away

from each other. Christian looked at him wide-eyed as

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Matt ran a hand through his hair, trying to calm himself
down and remember how to respond.

The buzzer sounded again.
Matt knew it was Sam, and he knew he could choose

to ignore it, tell Sam he was asleep or in the shower or
something, but Sam had a key. Which he thankfully
hadn't used. Besides, the spell was broken.

Matt got up and pressed the intercom button. "Yeah?"

He was proud of himself for being able to keep his voice
steady.

"Hey, it's me. Let me in." Matt glanced quickly at

Christian, who was still flushed but presentable. He
could blame it on the liquor. He pressed the buzzer,
triggering the lock mechanism and letting Sam in.

Christian turned away from him and finished the last

of his beer. "I should go."

Part of Matt wanted to tell Christian to stay, that there

was no real reason for him to leave, but he didn't.

Christian was already pulling on his coat when Sam

opened the door.

"Hey, man. I'm in search of --" Sam hardly missed a

beat when he noticed Christian, "Oh, hey, Christian. I
didn't realize you guys hung out. Anyway, I'm in search
of a pool partner. You guys interested?"

Christian's posture was stiff and he was chewing his

bottom lip.

"I was just leaving." Christian spoke before Matt

could think of a response that wasn't obnoxious.

Sam was looking at them both curiously, which

irritated Matt further. He wasn't sure if Sam's surprise to
find that he was hanging out with Christian said more
about Matt's limited number of friends, or Sam's
nosiness.

Then Sam shrugged. "Okay. What about you, Matt?

Want to knock some balls around?"

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Not with you was the first response that popped into

Matt's head. "Sure, what the hell." Christian was already
leaving and playing pool would keep him from thinking
about Sam's shitty timing. "Just give me a second." Matt
felt bad leaving Christian and Sam standing awkwardly
by the door, but he needed a minute to breathe and
splash some cold water on his face. Sam really did have
shitty timing.

When he returned from the bathroom, Christian and

Sam were talking about some people Matt didn't know,
reminding him that Christian and Sam shared a circle of
friends Matt was unfamiliar with. Matt grabbed a jacket
out of the closet and opened the front door.

Christian seemed relieved and muttered a "thanks" as

he passed Matt into the hallway.

Once they were on the street, Christian bid them both

good night and rode off. Matt's eyes fastened on
Christian's disappearing form until he turned the corner.

"Guy's not usually that tense," Sam commented.
Not knowing what to say to that, Matt changed the

subject. "Where are we going, anyway?"

Sam shrugged. "Riley's. I probably won't make much

money there, but you kind of suck anyway." Sam
grinned unrepentantly.

"Thanks, asshole." Matt rolled his eyes and followed

Sam to the bar.

***

As the weather suddenly turned into full-blown fall,

windy and rainy and cold, Matt hoped Christian had
switched to a more sensible form of transportation. Matt
could appreciate Christian's self-reliance, but bike riding
in this kind of weather seemed extreme. Still, Matt
wasn't all that surprised to find Christian unlocking his

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bike under what felt like buckets of rain one particularly
stormy night after work.

Christian laughed as soon as he saw Matt's

disheveled appearance.

"Don't laugh, I'm soaked." Matt tried to sound

grumpy but Christian's good mood proved infectious.

Christian placed his hands on his hips. "Do I look dry

to you? And, damn it, there goes my bus."

Matt took a good look and grinned. "You look like a

drowned rat. C'mon." He gestured toward where the
truck was parked.

"You are a life saver," Christian said as he settled in

the passenger seat.

Matt pulled into traffic, the rain and glare combining

for horrible visibility. "You're lucky I got out when I
did. I almost got stuck for another hour but managed to
convince my boss I can handle it from home."

Christian made a face. "At least when I leave work, I

get to actually stop working."

"I don't know, it's kind of like school, right?

Homework."

"Yeah, but you expect it with school, not so much

with work."

"True, but it's not like I've got anything else going on

tonight."

"Does it get lonely living by yourself? Or am I

prying?" He added when Matt didn't answer right away.

"A little," Matt admitted.
Christian tilted his head. "A little I'm prying, or a

little it gets lonely?"

Matt smiled. "A little it gets lonely. It doesn't usually

bug me, but it does get boring sometimes. Mostly I like
it because there's no one to argue about TV or music or
bitch if I don't pick up my laundry." He shrugged.
"Besides, I spent enough time living with other guys in

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the service. The privacy is still a novelty sometimes."

"I never thought of that. That must get awkward,

never having any privacy."

"It could get... yeah, it could get awkward. Mostly we

pretended not to notice a lot of shit so there was some
illusion of privacy."

Christian shifted in his seat and abruptly changed the

subject. "So, how was your pool game?"

"Not bad. We won a few bucks, nothing spectacular.

You okay?" Matt thought Christian seemed
uncomfortable.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm good."
Matt couldn't spare a glance from the road to confirm

Christian's words. They fell silent for the rest of the
drive to Christian's apartment.

"Come upstairs? I mean, do you want to come up for

a drink or something?" Christian asked as Matt pulled
into the lot.

"Sure." Matt wasn't sure which of them was more

surprised by his answer, but he was becoming good at
not thinking about certain things.

"Cool." Christian sounded pleased.
The rain had let up a little during the drive so they

didn't get pummeled during the walk from the truck to
the apartment.

Christian seemed a little nervous as he offered Matt a

drink. "There's beer in the fridge, and maybe some juice
or something."

"Beer's fine." Matt hung his jacket on the coat rack

next to the front door.

"Okay. Go ahead and have a seat. Sorry there's no

TV."

Matt found the couch surprisingly comfortable, given

that it had clearly seen better days, its orange fabric
showing wear. He picked up a copy of Wired from the

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assortment of magazines on the coffee table.

Christian came in a minute later and handed Matt a

beer, then sat down. From the look on Christian's face,
Matt didn't think his dress pants were doing a very good
job of hiding his half-hard cock.

"Thanks." Matt took a drink and searched for

something to say. "So, what did you do after you left the
other night?"

Christian chewed on his bottom lip. "Came home and

thought about making out with you."

"Yeah?" Heat pooled in Matt's stomach at the

unexpected response.

"Uh-huh." Christian took a sip of beer. "I was hard

the entire ride home."

The thought made Matt harder. "Must have been a

challenging ride."

Christian bit his lip. "My roommate's not home."
Matt felt himself grin. "No? Is he going to show up

during a really awkward moment again?"

"Fuck, I hope not." Christian leaned in and kissed

Matt, gently sucking on Matt's lower lip. Christian
reached out to touch and giggled when his beer bottle
encountered Matt's chest. Christian broke the kiss long
enough to put both of their bottles on the table.

Matt slid one arm across the back of the couch and

the other around Christian's waist. He gave up playing
hard to get and kissed Christian hungrily.

Christian ran his hands over Matt's chest, fingers

teasing over Matt's nipples. Matt's own hands wandered
under Christian's T-shirt, feeling the warm skin of
Christian's back and ribs.

Christian started unbuttoning Matt's shirt, breaking

off their kiss and watching as he bared Matt's chest.

Matt watched Christian work open the buttons of his

dress shirt. The intent look on Christian's face almost

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made him groan. "Fuck, you look so turned on."

"Do you have any idea how hot you are?" Christian's

hands moved lower and he leaned forward, placing wet
kisses on Matt's chest. Christian pulled one of Matt's
nipples into his mouth, circling the hard peak with his
tongue and sucking gently. When Matt's fingers
threaded through Christian's hair, he sucked harder and
pinched Matt's other nipple.

Matt thrust his hips up. "Oh, fuck. That's..." He

leaned back, giving Christian more access. Christian
groaned and kept kissing Matt's chest and abs.

Christian's hand on Matt's thigh drew more sounds

and encouraged Matt to spread his thighs wider.
Christian slid up Matt's body, pushing him further down
against the couch. Matt felt Christian's fingers graze
over his cock before Christian was on top of him,
kissing him again.

Matt pulled Christian tight against him, one hand still

on Christian's head and the other on Christian's ass. He
tugged on Christian's shirt. "Can I take this off?"

Christian sat up and pulled the T-shirt over his head,

tossing it on to the floor.

"Eager?" Matt teased.
"I want you." Christian leaned back down and kissed

Matt again. Matt wrapped his arms around Christian's
back and ass, rocking his hips up rhythmically.

If Matt didn't slow down, he would come just from

this, and he definitely wanted more. He pushed them up
into a sitting position and moved his mouth to
Christian's throat, working his way down to Christian's
chest and nipples, the hard muscle and flat planes so
different from the women Matt was used to.

Christian moaned and arched, pushing against Matt's

mouth. Matt could see how hard Christian was as he
pulled Christian into another kiss.

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"I want to touch you," Matt muttered, reaching to rub

his hand over the front of Christian's jeans. He didn't
know if it was the novelty of being with a guy, but Matt
felt like a teenager, hot and horny and eager.

Christian rested his forehead against Matt's shoulder

as his hips moved rhythmically against Matt's hand.
"Oh, God. Please, please. I want you." Christian
whimpered as Matt undid the button of his jeans.

Just the idea of what he was doing had Matt panting;

the reality was even better. He watched, almost
mesmerized by his own actions as he touched Christian
through the worn denim. He could see Christian's cock
throbbing and see the wet spot starting to form. He
pulled Christian's zipper down and moaned as he
exposed Christian's erection.

Matt wrapped his hand around Christian's cock and

started slowly jerking him. The desperate sounds that
Christian was making and the feel of Christian's
incredibly hot shaft made Matt's own dick swell.

"Oh, fuck, Matt. More. I'm so close." Matt kissed

Christian hard and sped up his strokes. He felt Christian
tense and broke their kiss so he could watch Christian
climax. He released his grip as Christian started to relax.
Matt rubbed his hand across Christian's stomach and
leaned in for another kiss, trying to be gentle even
though he felt a little desperate.

Christian kissed him back before asking, "What do

you want?"

Matt knew exactly what he wanted, what he kept

dreaming about. "Suck me."

Christian let out a soft moan and slid to the floor

between Matt's legs. Matt knew he wouldn't last and was
thankful Christian made short work of getting Matt's
pants and boxers out of the way, swallowing Matt
without hesitation. It didn't take much for Matt to come,

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shooting into Christian's throat with a strangled moan.

Christian backed off as soon as Matt started to soften

and placed a kiss on Matt's thigh before moving back to
the couch.

"You look so fucking hot like this." Christian was

still touching Matt's chest.

Matt kissed him again, tasting his own come in

Christian's mouth. Matt dropped his head back. "Hey."
His voice was rough.

Christian smiled, looking thoroughly sated. "Hey. Do

you want to order pizza or do you need to get home?"

Matt wanted to stay and do more than eat pizza. But,

"I can't, I really do have to get some work done tonight."
Matt grinned. "Maybe next time I rescue you from
drowning in a rain storm."

Christian laughed. "Deal."
Matt let Christian kiss him again, even though it was

making it difficult for him to leave.

Christian seemed to sense Matt's discomfort and

pulled away, standing to retrieve the shirt he'd thrown
haphazardly.

Matt started to adjust himself and realized that his

hand was still covered in Christian's come. "Um. Can I
use your bathroom?"

Christian laughed again. "Sure, it's right through

there."

It only took a moment for Matt to make himself

presentable again. Christian was waiting for him,
wearing a clean T-shirt, when Matt returned.

Matt was never good at this part. "So, um. Thanks for

the beer."

"No problem. Thanks for coming up. And for the

ride."

"Cool. I'll see you."
"See you." Matt heard the door shut behind him as he

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jogged down the steps.

***

Matt was at Riley's Saturday night with Sam and

Alison, playing pool and unwinding from another crazy
week. He froze momentarily when he saw Christian
walk in with the guy he thought he recognized as
Christian's roommate. Shit. His pulse sped up -- he
wasn't sure if it was nervousness, anticipation, or both --
and his fingers clutched his beer glass as he watched the
two men walk up to the bar, clearly having a good time
and oblivious to Matt's presence.

What was he supposed to do now?
He couldn't remember if he'd told Christian he and

Sam hung out here a lot or if Christian had no idea Matt
would be here. Women Matt had casual relationships
with always seemed to want him to acknowledge them,
unless they were on a date with someone else.

Would Christian expect something? Or was Matt

going to have to watch Christian on a date? Matt had the
sudden sickening realization that the latter would be at
least as bad as the first option.

Fuck. He was getting in way over his head.
It didn't take long for Christian to notice him,

probably because Matt was staring. When Christian
waved in his direction, Matt responded with a slight
acknowledgment but looked away quickly, trying to rein
in his thoughts. Maybe Christian wouldn't stay long and
Matt could avoid any awkwardness.

Sam whapped him on the side of his head. "Dude.

Are you listening to a word I say?"

"Ow." Matt rubbed the spot Sam had hit. "Shit. I'm

sorry, I spaced. What?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "I was talking about the

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Martinez trade." Sam continued on and Matt made
himself focus, arguing good naturedly with Sam and
Alison about whether the trade would backfire on both
teams. Twenty minutes later, it was Matt's turn to pick
up the next round. Christian stepped up next to him
while he was at the bar waiting for his pitcher.

"Hi." Christian sounded nonchalant.
Matt's jaw clenched reflexively. "Hey. I didn't know

you came here." Matt thought he might have sounded a
little accusatory.

"I don't usually. Trent discovered it last week and

insisted I come out before my brain has a meltdown
from studying too much."

The bartender returned with Matt's pitcher, collected

his money, and took Christian's order.

"Exams?" Matt asked, hoping Christian didn't notice

how uncomfortable Matt was, but not wanting to just
walk away. Fuck, he could not figure things out with
this guy.

"Soon. Mostly papers. It kind of sucks, but it'll be

over soon." Christian folded and refolded the ten-dollar
bill he was holding.

"Cool." Matt picked up the pitcher. "I should get this

back before Sam gets cranky."

"'Kay. See you."
Matt threaded his way through the crowd, carefully

carrying the pitcher and avoiding any spills. He was
filling their glasses when Alison pointed out Christian.

"Is that our barista?"
"Yeah, that's Christian." Matt placed the pitcher

carefully on the table, the unease from earlier returning.
Alison had teased him before about his friendliness
toward Christian and he didn't know what Sam thought
about finding them hanging out together.

"You should invite him over." She took a drink,

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holding his gaze over the rim of her glass.

"I think he's with friends, Al." Deflect, Matt.
"We don't count as friends?" Sam asked. "Hey, we

need a fourth for pool."

Before Matt could even begin to formulate a

response, Sam was on his way over to where Christian
sat.

"So you and Christian have started hanging out a lot,

huh?" Alison asked.

Fuck. "I guess." Matt tried to shrug off the question.

"I drove him home a couple of times." This night was
definitely not going the way Matt expected.

"Sam said you and Christian were hanging out last

weekend when Sam was looking for someone to play
pool shark with." Alison had the uncanny ability to
sound casual when she was grilling him.

Matt really hated being the subject of his friends'

gossip.

Sam returned, followed by Christian and his friend.

"Come on, let's go stake out a table."

Matt had no option but to follow and try to ignore his

racing pulse. He was tempted to make an excuse and
leave, but that would make him seem like an asshole. He
had no idea how he was supposed to act and he was still
unsure of what to make of the physical part of his
relationship with Christian, who definitely gave the best
head Matt had ever had.

They didn't have to wait long for a table to open up

and Matt was relieved that everyone seemed to get along
okay. He was able to relax a bit after a quick round of
introductions proved that Sam knew both Christian and
Christian's roommate, Trent, through a mutual friend's
parties. He felt less like he was on the spot and was able
to enjoy the rest of the night, even if his cock did stay
half-hard.

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They stayed through last call, later than Matt had

planned on being out. Once the lights turned on,
everyone scattered quickly. Alison was Sam's
designated driver, and Trent and Christian had plans to
meet other friends at a diner. Matt parted ways and had
started to walk the few blocks home when he heard
Christian telling Trent he was going to pass on the diner.

Matt reached the corner and waited for the light to

change, hoping Christian would catch up with him. Shit,
he was getting hard just thinking about it. He was so
wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't hear Christian
walk up next to him.

"Hey, again," Christian said.
Matt turned and smiled at him. "Hey. Change your

mind about going to meet your friends?"

Christian looked at him. "I did. It didn't sound like

much fun."

The light changed and they walked across the street.

One more block and they would turn in separate
directions.

"Are you heading home?" Matt asked.
"Unless I get a better offer."
Matt hoped he wasn't misreading things. "You could

come back to the condo." Matt looked over at Christian
in time to see him bite his lip.

"Okay."
Matt turned and led the way, trying not to rush but

wanting to get home quickly. Christian was right there
beside him, not saying a word, so he figured they were
on the same page.

The cold kept Matt's hard-on mostly at bay until they

were inside Matt's condo. They just stared at each other
for a minute before one of them moved -- or maybe it
was both of them -- and they were pressed together,
mouths hot and hands searching. There was no attempt

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at seduction this time, no half-hearted attempt to give
one another a chance to back away, just heat and need.

Matt turned and pushed Christian up against the wall.

Christian used the leverage to wrap his legs around
Matt's waist, pressing their erections together.

"Oh, fuck." Matt broke the kiss, gasping for air.

Christian didn't stop, just moved to suck on Matt's neck
and earlobe. The heat was almost unbearable.

Christian was struggling to get Matt's shirt out of his

pants but they were pressed so tightly together that there
wasn't much room to maneuver. Once it was finally
untucked, Matt helped yank it over his head.

"Oh, God, you're so fucking hot. Look at you."

Christian's hands were all over Matt's chest and arms.
Matt leaned his hands on either side of Christian's head,
holding the smaller man up with just his thighs.

"You think so?" Matt was surprised at the husky

sound of his own voice.

Christian rested his head on Matt's forearm, hands

travelling over Matt's belly. "You have no idea. I
thought sucking you off would get it out of my system,
but I can't stop thinking about you. You looked so hot on
my couch the other night." He paused before adding, "I
thought I was going to embarrass myself watching you
play pool earlier."

Matt's laugh turned into a groan when Christian

flicked his thumb over Matt's nipple. Matt kissed him
again, harder this time, pent-up need taking over and
making him uncharacteristically aggressive. Christian
responded by digging his fingers into Matt's shoulders
and grinding against Matt.

"That's so hot," Matt muttered as he kissed Christian's

neck. Christian tipped his head back with a soft thump,
giving Matt better access.

"Oh! What?"

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"That. They way you get so turned on and don't tell

me I'm being too rough."

"God. No. Fucking amazing."
Matt tried to get Christian's shirt off but realized he

had no room. He stepped back reluctantly and let
Christian down. "We should move this somewhere else."

Christian nodded and it only took Matt a second to

opt for the bedroom over the couch. He wanted to get
Christian naked, wanted to find out if there was more to
this than just desperate blowjobs.

Matt stopped near the bed, arms around Christian's

waist. Christian's hands were still sliding over Matt's
chest and arms like he couldn't get enough. Christian
leaned up and kissed Matt softly. "We don't have to do
anything you don't want."

Jesus, wasn't that his line? It was fucking weird, but

he kissed Christian back. "I want to touch you. I want to
get naked with you and not worry about getting
interrupted. I want to do more than jerk you off on the
couch."

Christian groaned. "It makes me fucking hot when

you say things like that."

"Yeah?" He pulled Christian's T-shirt off. "You want

me to tell you how I never thought guys were sexy and
now I can't stop thinking about you?" He mirrored
Christian's movements and touched Christian's chest and
arms. He moved his hands down to Christian's jeans,
opening the button but stopping, instead wrapping his
hands around Christian's hips, down to cup firm ass
cheeks. He kissed Christian's neck and shoulder.

Matt pulled away long enough to tug the blankets

down on the bed. He sat on the edge of the bed to take
his boots off.

Christian toed his sneakers off and crawled on the

bed behind Matt. Matt couldn't see him, but could feel

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his breath as he lay close and traced the muscles on
Matt's back.

"God, even your back is ripped. I didn't know real

people looked like this."

Matt turned and lay next to Christian, reaching out

and putting a hand on Christian's hip. "I'll have to
remember to go to the gym more often." He ignored the
implication that he was planning on messing around
with Christian again and leaned in for another kiss. Matt
moaned at the feel of their naked chests rubbing
together.

"If you get any hotter, I might come just from

looking at you," Christian managed to gasp out.

Matt was half on top of Christian now, one of

Christian's legs wrapped around Matt's, pressing them
together. Matt rubbed his prick against Christian's hip,
not enough to get off, but enough to make him ache.

"Is this okay?" he asked, suddenly wondering how

fast he should be moving and wanting to make sure
Christian was with him.

"Oh, God, yes, anything you want to do is okay. Do

you have any idea how badly I want you?"

Matt kissed him again, unable to get enough and

reveling in the taste and the sharp pressure of teeth
clashing.

"I just. God." He was kissing Christian's chest now,

supporting himself on one elbow as his leg slid along
Christian's thigh. "I want you so much." He trailed his
tongue around Christian's nipple, making Christian
whimper. "I've never wanted anyone like this." He was
placing little sucking kisses on Christian's stomach, not
hard enough to leave a mark, but enough to make
Christian writhe. As he moved lower, Christian's
moaning got louder.

Matt touched Christian's inner thigh gently,

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wondering if it turned Christian on as much as it did
him. He was rewarded with a sharp gasp as Christian's
hips started thrusting, a string of breathless words falling
on Matt's ears.

"Feels so good. Been hard all night."
Matt moved his hand over Christian's balls, causing

Christian to hump him harder. He opened Christian's
jeans as Christian implored him to touch more. Matt
kissed Christian as he teased Christian, grinding against
Christian's thigh in earnest now.

Christian broke the kiss suddenly. "No, wait, naked,

please." Christian started fumbling with Matt's zipper,
touching his aching shaft inadvertently and making Matt
lose focus. He wanted Christian, wanted them both
naked. Now. He managed to get Christian's jeans and
boxers off before practically tearing his own off.

Once naked, he crawled back up the bed and

Christian pulled him in for another mind-blowing kiss as
they ground furiously against each other, sweat and
precome making their shafts slide together.

Christian rolled them suddenly, pushing Matt onto

his back and straddling him. Matt grabbed Christian's
ass, fingers digging in as they both rubbed and moaned,
seeking release. Matt tore one of his hands away from
Christian's ass and wrapped it around their cocks. He
alternated between watching himself jerk them off
together and watching Christian's face, both equally
fascinating. Matt felt it the moment Christian started to
come, prick pulsing and body going stiff. The sensations
combined with the warm come on Matt's hand triggered
Matt's own climax and he threw back his head as he
thrust up hard against Christian and came all over both
of them.

When the world stopped spinning, Matt opened his

eyes and realized Christian was still on top of him and

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his hand was still wrapped around their now-soft cocks.

"You're going to get stuck to me," Matt chided.
He felt Christian's smile against his chest as the other

man spoke. "Well, you're pretty comfy."

Christian showed no signs of moving and, oddly

enough, Matt didn't do anything to separate them. He
did, however, slide his hand out from between them.

Matt started to doze as they continued to lie there for

a few more minutes. Eventually, Christian shifted to the
side, head pillowed on Matt's chest and arm stretched
across his stomach.

"We probably should clean up so I can head home."

Christian's words sounded sleepy.

"Yeah, okay." Matt wasn't sure if he should be

disappointed or relieved. He was perfectly comfortable
the way they were, but it had been ages since he'd
actually spent the night with anyone. He didn't want
Christian to start getting the wrong idea about what was
going on.

Whatever the hell that was. Spending the night

always led to questions and expectations that Matt
wasn't ready to address. All he could say for sure was
that he liked Christian, liked spending time together.
He'd also admit that the sex was damn good, but waking
up with Christian in his bed would make Matt ask
himself too many questions about why he wanted to
have sex with Christian almost constantly.

Instead, he watched silently as Christian stretched, sat

up, and went to use the master bath.

"Shit, you have two bathrooms for one person. I

would kill to not have to share with Trent."

Matt looked at the clock and realized it was almost

three a.m. Christian declined Matt's offer of a ride home,
which Matt was grateful for.

"Thanks for the offer, though." Christian looked

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almost shy. "I'm glad I ran into you." He leaned up and
kissed Matt quickly before leaving.

Matt sighed at the sudden odd turn of his life; he

wondered if this was what it meant to be a closet case.

***

It became a routine. Matt would "run into" Christian

outside of the coffee shop on the way home, load
Christian's bike into the truck, and they would have
dinner somewhere. After dinner, they would go back to
Matt's and inevitably end up fooling around on the
couch. They never talked explicitly about what they
were doing; Matt always invited Christian over on the
pretense of "hanging out."

Matt didn't particularly want to discuss the fact that

he was having the best orgasms of his life with a very
out gay man that he had met at a party. He couldn't lie to
himself anymore about his attraction to men, but he
certainly didn't need to tell the world. He wasn't ready to
label himself gay, but he couldn't very well deny the
direction his fantasies -- and his porn -- were taking. It
was a fine line he was walking, but he still saw no
reason to look at things too deeply.

Leaving work late once again on a Friday night, Matt

was surprised to find Christian unlocking his bike.

"Hey," Matt said as he walked up.
"Hey." Christian smiled at him.
"You look tired. You want a ride?"
"I would love a ride, but I really do have to get home.

I have finals next week and I'm totally behind on
studying."

Matt tried to push down the flash of disappointment

that he felt. He was coming to expect to see Christian
and it hadn't occurred to him that he would get turned

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down. "Well, that sucks, but I can still drive you."

Christian unlocked his bike and started walking

toward Matt's usual parking space.

"One of these days, I'm going to have to park

somewhere else just to confuse you."

Christian laughed. "Just wait until after finals or you

might send me over the edge."

"That bad?" Matt opened the truck and loaded the

bike.

Christian gave him a curious look before answering.

"Well, I've been a little distracted."

"Oh." Matt was pretty sure he blushed. He bit his lip,

unconsciously mimicking Christian's nervous gesture.

Christian giggled. "It's okay. Come on, drive me

home." He walked around Matt and got in the truck.

Matt shook himself out of his temporary shock and

embarrassment and locked up the tailgate.

When Christian fell asleep in the passenger seat on

the short ride to his apartment, Matt couldn't help but
notice how cute Christian looked.

Shaking his head at himself, Matt leaned over and

shook Christian gently. "Hey. We're here."

Christian blinked awake. "Oh. Shit, sorry. I'm not

very good company." He undid his seatbelt and looked
up at Matt. "Thanks for the ride."

Matt smiled, tempted to kiss him. "No problem. Go

study and good luck with your finals."

"Thanks." He could see Christian hesitate before he

turned and got out.

"See you next week."
"Bye."
Matt tried to not be disappointed and waited until

Christian was up the stairs before pulling out and
heading home.

Matt spent the evening flipping channels and, oddly

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enough, missing Christian. Mystery Diagnosis. What fun
was a "slightly bizarre but you already know the
answer" diagnosis? *click* Bridget Jones' Diary
followed by Bridget Jones' Diary's sequel. Fuck, no.
Why was that movie always on, anyway? *click* A
Rocky movie, followed by ten other Rocky movies.
*click* Star Trek. Guy in a red shirt dies. *click* News.
*click* News.

God damn it, there was fuck all on. It made Matt

wonder why he even paid for cable.

He thought about Christian and wondered how

studying was going.

Jesus, he was getting pathetic.
He threw the remote down with a sigh and decided to

distract himself with a book.

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Chapter Nine

For once, Matt found himself with nothing to do all

weekend. Sam had some new girlfriend taking up his
time, Alison had plans, and Christian was studying. His
boredom Sunday afternoon sent him to the coffee shop
in hopes of seeing Christian.

Christian was indeed working, looking frazzled and

even more tired than he had on Friday, but he still
managed a smile when Matt got in line.

"Hey. The usual?" Christian was already grabbing a

cup.

"Yeah. How's your day?"
"Long, and I've still got a ton of stuff to do tonight."

Christian sounded distracted.

Matt waited as Christian rang him up. "When's your

first exam?"

Matt thought Christian looked annoyed. "Tomorrow

at ten, another on Wednesday and two on Thursday."

"Ouch. What time do you get off?" He handed over

cash for his drink.

"In an hour. Your drink's ready." Christian turned and

disappeared into the back, leaving Matt frowning at his
uncharacteristic terseness.

"He's been bitchy all weekend," the woman -- Sally,

according to her name tag -- behind the counter said.

"It's probably his finals. Thanks for the coffee." He

barely heard her reply as he went to sit at one of the
tables near the window. He considered leaving, since
Christian was obviously in a bad mood, but he'd driven
across town for coffee he could get a block from his
apartment.

It seemed like ages since they'd hung out and Matt,

well fuck, he just missed Christian. Missed the sex, but

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missed the just hanging out and bullshitting, too.
Christian had started to become a good friend.

Of course, he'd never exactly missed Sam like this.

Then again, he'd never been attracted to Sam.

Shuddering slightly at that thought, Matt opened his

book, keeping half an eye on the time so that he didn't
miss Christian. He looked up about forty minutes later
and saw Christian walking out the far door. He got up
and followed, annoyed at being intentionally ignored.

"Christian!" He saw Christian tense before spinning

around.

"What?"
"I thought I could give you a ride home." He

frowned, confusion warring with anger at Christian's
response.

Christian shrugged, arms folded across his chest.

"You don't have to."

Wow, Christian could do pissed off extremely well,

Matt noted.

"I know." Anger won out. "Forget it." Matt started to

leave but Christian called out and stopped him.

"Wait. I'm sorry." Christian seemed to deflate. "Can

you really give me a ride?"

Matt sighed. Fuck, he hated shit like this. "Yeah,

come on."

Christian nodded silently and started walking with

him.

They were on the road before Matt bothered to try

and break the silence. "Do you want to get some food?"

"Which part of 'I have to study' don't you understand?

Look, I get that you didn't go to college, but I can't just
coast by and I've wasted a bunch of time not studying."

Matt clenched his jaw and counted to ten. That was

definitely not the response he was expecting to his peace
offering. "Fine, forget I asked. Christ, you still need to

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eat, don't you?"

"I can eat while I study. It's not like I can afford to eat

out all the time, anyway."

"What the fuck is your problem?"
"What's my problem? Jesus, Matt, how oblivious are

you? We've been fucking around for weeks, I spend
more time with you than anyone else, and you don't
have a clue when my finals are. You've never even
asked for my phone number, but you show up at work
and expect me to be able to just rearrange my schedule
and do whatever the hell you want."

"That's bullshit, Christian. I never forced you to do

anything. You don't want to hang out, fine."

"I didn't say that. All I said is that it would be nice if

you had a fucking clue about me."

"Shit, do you think I know Sam's fucking schedule?

No, I call him, he calls me, we hang out if we're free.
What the hell do you expect?"

"Oh, so you're sleeping with Sam, too? You've got

me all fucking compartmentalized. You hardly even talk
to me in public unless you're buying coffee."

Matt almost stopped the car. Instead, he kept driving.

"That's bullshit and you know it."

"Is it? You want to know what I think?" Christian

didn't wait for an answer. "I think you're so freaked out
by the fact that you're fucking around with a guy that
you're trying to hide from everything. I think you're
afraid that someone might notice you're hanging around
with a fag and it might hurt your fucking image."

Matt didn't say anything; he had no response to that.

Matt couldn't say for certain that Christian was that far
off base; after all, Matt was putting a lot of energy into
keeping Christian separate from the rest of his life. He
pulled up in front of Christian's apartment complex a
few minutes later.

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"Matt."
Matt was done listening and he refused to be forced

into a conversation about whatever it was they were
doing. Shit, this was exactly why he tried to avoid
relationships. He needed some distance before he said
something he'd really regret. "Get out."

"Matt." Christian tried again, sounding almost

contrite.

"Get the fuck out of my truck, Christian. You're right,

I don't know your God dammed schedule and I don't
know your phone number, and I don't really fucking
want to." Well, so much for keeping his mouth shut.

"Fuck you." Christian got out of the truck. "Open the

fucking tailgate so I can get my bike."

Matt popped the gate and pulled out as soon as

Christian slammed it shut again.

He drove home, having to focus hard on the driving.

He hated being this pissed off, and he hated driving
when he was pissed.

He made it home without getting anyone killed and

stormed into his apartment, slamming the door behind
him. Hanging his coat up, he continued into the kitchen
in search of a beer.

What the fuck was that about, anyway? All he did

was ask Christian if he wanted to get dinner and
suddenly he was the inconsiderate bad guy. God damn
it.

***

Alison stopped by Matt's desk Monday afternoon and

leaned against his cube. "I need some coffee. Want to
take a walk?"

Matt leaned back in his chair. "I don't know, I'm

pretty busy. Rain check?"

Where You Least Expect It - 106

"Oh, come on. It'll only be fifteen minutes. You can

chat with Christian and I can get my caffeine fix."

Matt startled at Christian's name, but tried to hide it.

"I don't even know if he's working."

"Huh. I thought you were driving him home on a

regular basis?"

Matt shrugged. "When I run into him in the parking

lot sometimes. It's not like we're carpooling."

"Well, whatever. Come get coffee with me. We can

talk about the database conversion and call it an off-site
meeting."

Knowing that arguing was pointless, Matt turned off

his computer screen and followed Alison, keeping the
conversation focused on work topics.

Christian was behind the counter, but was apparently

still angry at Matt, rebuffing his attempts at small talk
but chatting easily with Alison. Christian's slight wasn't
lost on either of them; Matt hoped Alison wouldn't
mention it.

No such luck. "He didn't seem very happy to see

you," she commented.

Matt shrugged. "He got pissed at me because I didn't

know his finals schedule."

Alison looked at him, frowning. "Really? That seems

kind of random."

Matt sighed, trying to explain without giving too

many details. "I was here for coffee and asked him if he
wanted to grab dinner. He got all pissed because he's got
finals and apparently I'm supposed to be a mind reader."

"Huh." Matt hated when she said that; he knew it

meant she didn't really believe him. "Did he not tell you
his schedule?"

"I don't know. Maybe. What difference does it

make?"

Alison gave him her patented "poor clueless Matt"

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look and shook her head. "Matty, honey. I know you
could give a damn about whether or not I know what
nights you go to the gym and what sports shows you
schedule your time around, but most people do actually
care about things like that." Alison continued over
Matt's attempt to respond. "And don't give me that 'I
don't know anyone's schedule' crap, because we both
know that's not true. You're fine with it as long as it's me
and Sam because you trust us, but you won't find other
people to trust unless you put a little something out there
in exchange."

"Put something out there? Al, he's a guy I give a ride

to occasionally." Matt defended himself even as he
wondered if Alison suspected his relationship with
Christian went beyond the occasional ride home; he
quickly pushed the thought aside. "Besides, how am I
supposed to guess what's important to people?"

"It's not that difficult, Matt. If you claim to be friends

with someone but show no real interest in their life,
you're not going to have a very long friendship. Look,
I'm not trying to lecture you, but you're always a little
clueless when people get pissed at you and you need to
get over that."

Matt begrudgingly agreed, feeling like he was being

scolded for being immature. "Katie did say I could be an
insensitive asshole." Leave it to Alison to point out his
flaws.

"So, are you going to apologize?" Alison stopped

outside the door to their building.

Matt was almost convinced that Alison knew he and

Christian were maybe more than just friends. He wasn't
comfortable with the idea, but she didn't seem to be
judging him -- not for that, anyway. "Maybe," he finally
conceded.

Alison looked like she wanted to say more, but

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changed the conversation back to their project as they
entered the building.

Maybe Christian did have reason to be angry with

him; maybe he was being insensitive and inconsiderate.
And maybe it was weird that they were spending so
much time together -- much of it naked -- and they
hadn't exchanged phone numbers or emails.

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Chapter Ten

Matt spent a lot of time over the next few days

thinking about what Alison had said and tried to sort out
his feelings about Christian, about their relationship,
about himself. He suddenly felt like he was at a
crossroads and the options were moving forward or
staying stuck. His liked his life before he met Christian
just fine; now, though, considering staying on that path,
he wondered how he'd feel years from now. Would he
still be content or would he just be alone and grumpy?

Of course, once he had decided to talk to Christian

the next chance he got, work refused to cooperate; it was
Friday by the time Matt managed to leave work on time
and catch Christian at the end of his shift.

Matt only had to wait a minute or two before

Christian came out of the café. Matt watched the
conflicting emotions cross Christian's features when he
saw Matt -- surprise, caution, settling on a wary smile.

Matt shoved his hands in his pockets as Christian

crossed the short distance between them.

"Hi, Matt."
"Hi. I. Um." Matt's carefully prepared words flew

from his mind in the face of his nervousness. He tried
again. "I was wondering if we could talk."

Christian's eyebrows shot up. "Talk?" He turned

away from Matt and unlocked his bike. "I don't know."
He paid great attention to coiling the lock around the bar
and securing it in place.

Matt ran his hand through his hair. "Look, I'm really

not good at this. I want to talk about what you said last
week. If you have time. We don't have to do it now."
Shit. Matt felt himself on the verge of babbling and
clenched his jaw to keep more words from spilling out.

Where You Least Expect It - 110

Christian looked at him for a long moment, seeming

to assess him before agreeing. "Yeah, okay. I don't have
any plans, anyway."

Matt's jaw unclenched and he let out an audible

breath of relief. "Cool. I can drive."

Christian nodded, a ghost of a smile on his lips.

"Okay."

Matt was unaccountably nervous waiting for

Christian to put his bike in the truck and buckle himself
into the passenger seat.

Matt stopped and turned before pulling out of the

spot, reminding himself that assuming where they stood
with each other was what got him into this predicament
in the first place. "Is it okay if we go to my place? Or
would you rather go somewhere else?"

Christian shook his head. "No, your place is fine."
They rode in silence; Christian's uncharacteristic

stillness letting Matt know the other man was as tense as
he was.

"So. How were your exams?" Matt grabbed on the

first semi-neutral topic he could think of to cut through
the awkwardness.

Christian made a pained sound and dropped his head

against the seat dramatically. "Horrible. Long. I had
writer's cramp by the end."

"Oh. So does that mean you didn't do as well as you

wanted?" Matt hated to think that Christian did poorly,
especially if he was to blame somehow.

Christian rolled his head to face Matt. "I said they

were horrible, I didn't say I did badly. Probably a couple
of As and a B. All of my papers are done, too, so now I
just have to wait a couple of weeks for grades to come
out."

"Cool." Matt didn't know what to say next and

Christian didn't offer any helpful conversation starters.

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The rest of the drive passed in awkward silence.
Once inside Matt's condo, Christian made it obvious

Matt needed to make the first move.

Matt took a deep breath. "Um. I guess. Shit. Are you

hungry?"

"No, I'm okay, but I'll take a beer if you have any."
Matt almost laughed from nerves. "I think I can

manage that."

When Matt came back from the kitchen, Christian

was still standing where he had been, eyes flicking
between Matt, the entertainment center, and the floor.

Matt gestured toward the couch. "You can sit."
Christian blushed. "Okay. Sorry."
"You don't need to apologize. I know this is weird."
Matt handed one of the bottles to Christian and sat

next to him. Matt took a swallow and watched Christian
pick at his beer label.

"So. I don't really know where to start."
Christian settled more comfortably on the couch. "It's

okay. Just -- start."

Matt took a deep breath. "Were you really pissed or

were you just stressed about your exams and looking for
somewhere to take it out?"

"Does it matter?"
It was a fair question. "I don't know. Probably not. I

still want to say some stuff, so I guess not."

Christian stared at his beer bottle, seeming to gather

his thoughts before speaking. "I... didn't realize I was
angry until I started talking. I wanted to get in touch
with you on Saturday but I didn't know how you would
react if I showed up on your doorstep. So when you
came in on Sunday, it just really annoyed me that you
could do that, and when you asked about my exams, it
really pissed me off that you didn't know a damn thing
about what was going on. And I know we never talked

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about having any kind of relationship or whatever, we
never had any pretenses of being more than casual fuck
buddies. I don't really have any right to be pissed."

Christian stopped and looked back down at his beer

and shrugged. "So, I bitched at you and I shouldn't
have."

Matt took another drink. "I don't know about that.

Like I said, I'm not good at this, but it's shitty of me to
consider us friends but not know what's important to
you." He rubbed his eyes, trying to refocus on what he
had brought Christian here to talk about in the first
place.

"Why the sudden change?" Christian asked.
Matt was relieved that Christian seemed genuinely

curious. "Alison lectured me about being a shitty friend
after we left the coffee shop on Monday."

Christian was silent for a while. He finally looked

back up at Matt. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure." Matt nodded. Maybe that would make it

easier.

Clearly hesitant, Christian wrinkled his brow. "Is it

just because you're fooling around with me?"

Matt thought he knew what Christian was trying to

ask and decided to make it a little easier. "Or am I
always an asshole?"

"I didn't say you were an asshole!" Christian asserted.
"No, you didn't. I did. Alison made it clear that I'm

inconsiderate and clueless, and she's right. I get caught
up in my own head sometimes and ignore how that
affects people."

"I don't think you're an asshole. I don't think Alison

does, either. I think that you've considered yourself
straight until a couple of weeks ago and that you might
not know what to think now."

That pretty much hit the proverbial nail on the head.

Where You Least Expect It - 113

"Yeah, well, it's not something I ever thought about
before I met you and I don't know what I'm supposed to
do about it, really."

Christian sighed and pulled his knees up to his chest.

"What do you want to do?" Christian laughed when Matt
cocked an eyebrow. "Okay, I'll rephrase. What do you
want to do about how you feel?" He tilted his head.
"How do you feel?"

Matt sighed, got up, and started pacing. "I don't

know." He leaned against the window, staring out at the
lights and traffic flowing past. "What am I supposed to
do? What am I supposed to tell people? Jesus, I'm not
even sure what I think. Am I gay? Bi? What?"

"I know how difficult this is, Matt, really." Christian

sounded sympathetic.

Matt turned and looked at Christian. "How old were

you when you figured it out?"

"Probably thirteen. Trent and I were, well, curious, I

guess." Christian picked at the fabric on the couch. "I
came out to my parents when I was fifteen after -- after
some shit happened at school."

Matt frowned. "What happened at school?"
Christian tried to brush it off. "Just stupid shit, kids

mouthing off at me. I came home with a black eye and
Mom asked me why. I think they were more upset that I
was getting hassled. I got the whole 'we love you no
matter what' speech." Christian shrugged again. "I was
lucky, but Trent's parents freaked and kicked him out
when he turned eighteen."

"That sucks. My parents died years ago, so at least I

don't have to worry about that. I think Alison might have
guessed, but I have no idea what Sam will say."

Christian looked thoughtful. "But you're still worried

about what other people will think, aren't you?"

Matt sighed heavily. "Yes, I am. People at work,

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people who keep trying to set me up with women
because they feel bad that Katie left me -- am I supposed
to tell them I'm dating a man? I don't have a fucking clue
what to expect."

Christian looked surprised. "Are you?"
"Am I what?" Matt hadn't quite realized what he'd

said.

"Dating a man?"
Matt didn't know what to make of the neutral

expression on Christian's face. "I don't know," he said
honestly. "I don't know how to do this."

Christian smiled slightly. "Probably the same way

you date women."

Matt rolled his eyes. "I suck at dating women."
"Well, then maybe we should back up a little."

Christian shifted on the couch, sitting up straighter.
"Look, can I be completely honest with you?"

Matt braced himself for the pending rejection and

immediately realized he didn't want that. "Sure."

"I like you. A lot. Maybe more than a lot. And I get

that you're scared and not ready to come out. But I don't
want to be your dirty little secret, either. I can handle
being friends with you, but I don't think I can handle
being just an easy blow job."

Matt turned and stared out the window again,

knowing he had a decision to make. He had two options:
he could apologize to Christian, part amicably, and act
friendly if they saw each other around town. That was
the easy way out.

The other option -- the one that was still making his

head spin -- was to take a huge fucking leap and admit
he wanted more than clandestine blow jobs.

Matt watched the traffic on the street below. Fuck it.

I've done scarier shit than this.

When he finally turned around, Christian still sat up

Where You Least Expect It - 115

straight, no longer trying to sink into the cushions, but
his expression was pensive. Matt took a deep breath. "I
don't want that either," he admitted.

"What do you want?" Christian asked. "Just so we're

on the same page."

Matt crossed the room and sat next to Christian. "I --"

the words got stuck and he had to swallow and start
again. "I want to see where this goes. I guess I want to
try having a relationship with you." Matt felt his face get
hot, but the world didn't end. He had never, ever done
something like this; even in his relationship with Katie,
he'd felt like a passive observer sometimes.

Christian grinned at him. "Are you asking me to go

steady?"

Matt blinked and laughed. "Maybe. Do adults even

do that?"

Christian giggled. "I don't know. I guess we'll have to

see."

Matt smiled back. "Now what?"
"Well, we could keep talking about how you feel

about coming out. Or you could kiss me."

"I like the second option better." Christian was still

smiling as Matt leaned in and kissed him, lightly at first,
just a brush of lips.

Christian uncurled himself and wrapped his arms

around Matt's neck. Matt responded by putting his arms
around Christian's waist and pulling Christian into his
lap so he could deepen the kiss, holding Christian
against him and running his palms over Christian's back.

Eventually, they had to part for air.
Christian leaned their foreheads together. "Hey."
"Hey." Matt nipped at Christian's chin.
"You're sure?"
"Yeah, I'm sure. That doesn't mean I might not fuck

up at some point, because I probably will, but hopefully

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it won't be too bad."

Christian kissed him again. "I'll try to keep you in

line."

"Does that mean I can have your phone number?"
Christian laughed. "I don't see why not."
"Oh, good. Then I won't have to stalk you at the

coffee shop anymore, I can just text you." Matt wrapped
a hand around the back of Christian's head and
proceeded to kiss him thoroughly.

"Fuck, I missed you."
"Yeah? I missed you, too. Made it hard to study."
"Sorry." Matt pulled back suddenly. "Did I say I was

sorry for being an ass? I am, you know."

"I know. Did I mention that I forgive you? Because I

do."

"Good. Now more kissing, less talking."
Matt felt slightly silly that Christian's laughter made

him get all warm inside, so he focused on kissing
instead of thinking. Christian's laughter subsided into
soft moans of pleasure, which Matt liked even more.

Matt wanted to spend more time kissing Christian,

feeling him push into the kisses. Matt slowly devoured
his mouth, looking for more moans and sighs, loving
how Christian didn't hold back.

The kiss went from a slow burn to hot faster than

Matt expected. He put his hands under Christian's ass
and stood up, making Christian moan, legs wrapped
tightly around Matt's waist.

"Fuck, you're strong."
"Uh-huh." Matt was already on his way to the

bedroom, holding Christian firmly and trying to stay
focused as Christian sucked on his neck. God damn, that
was hot.

Matt put one knee on the bed, dropping Christian

lightly before lying down next to him and kissing him.

Where You Least Expect It - 117

Christian groaned and started stripping Matt, yanking

his shirt over his head and starting on his pants. Matt
tried to push his cock into Christian's hand as it fought
with his zipper.

"You're not helping," Christian admonished.
Matt stilled his movements. "Sorry."
Christian got Matt's pants halfway down his legs and

stopped. "Shit. Shoes."

Matt groaned in frustration. It had only been a week

since he'd seen Christian but he was ready to bust, he
was so turned on. Christian fumbled with his shoes,
eventually getting them off, followed closely by the rest
of Matt's clothes.

Christian turned and just stared for a minute. "God,

look at you." He ran a hand slowly up Matt's thigh. "So
hot, so fucking hard." The last was accompanied by a
quick swipe of Christian's tongue across Matt's cock on
his way up to straddle Matt's hips.

"You're still dressed." Before Christian could

respond, Matt flipped them over and started pulling at
Christian's clothes, finally getting him naked. Matt
crawled back up the bed and shoved the covers out of
the way, making Christian squirm to accommodate the
sudden movement of the bedspread they were on top of.

"Picky," he teased.
"Practical," Matt corrected. "I don't want to have to

drag the bedspread down to the laundry room. Now
what did I say about less talking?"

Christian ran a hand up Matt's chest. "Don't you like

it when I tell you how fucking amazing you look, how I
love all your muscles?" Christian pinched a nipple and
Matt groaned. "How I love hearing you moan?"

Matt responded with a kiss, hard enough that their

teeth clashed. Christian's leg wrapped around his, one
hand twisting in his hair and the other grabbing his ass

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as they moved together.

Matt broke the kiss and gasped out, "Oh, God, I'm

close."

"Oh, fuck, yeah, honey. Do you want to come, Matt?

Fuck, honey, do it." Suddenly Christian was in charge,
grinding them together and panting in Matt's ear about
how hot Matt was, how he thought about Matt when he
touched himself.

Matt lost it, shouting something that might have been

Christian's name and might have just been nonsense.
Christian followed a second later, hot come mixing on
their stomachs.

They both collapsed, panting, still touching.
"I -- is this okay?" Matt stayed close, not quite

snuggling, but not too far away, either. He could just
make out Christian's features in the dim light coming in
through the windows.

"I think so," Christian said. "Remember, I said we

don't have to do anything you don't want to."

Matt had a sudden flash of insight, one that had

seemed to elude him in all of his previous relationships.
"I think I like it. Besides, if we're going to make this
work, we'll have to figure all of this out anyway, right? I
mean, we need to figure out what each of us likes and
how it works together."

Christian smiled. "Right. I like snuggling and

napping after sex."

Matt couldn't resist kissing Christian's smile. "I like

snuggling and napping with you after sex."

"Good deal." Christian curled into Matt, wrapping an

arm around Matt's waist and burying his face in Matt's
neck.

***

Where You Least Expect It - 119

When Matt woke up a few hours later, he was alone.

After a quick trip to the bathroom, he found Christian in
the kitchen, looking through his cabinets. He slipped his
arms around Christian's waist.

"Oh, hey." Christian leaned back against his chest. "I

didn't mean to wake you. I was hungry."

"Not trying to sneak out?" Matt teased.
"Nope. Not a chance. I was just hoping to steal some

of your food before you woke up."

"What were you going to do when I noticed?" Matt

didn't mention the fact that he probably wouldn't have
noticed.

Christian looked up at him. "Deny all knowledge and

blame it on gremlins, maybe."

Matt laughed. "I might have some spaghetti we can

make, or I can order us something."

"Spaghetti's fine. I'm kind of low on cash anyway."

Christian nuzzled against him.

"Okay." Matt dropped a kiss on Christian's shoulder.

"I'll buy you real food tomorrow."

Christian smiled and turned around. "You mean like a

real date?"

Matt's eyebrow went up as he looked at Christian

with mild incredulity before laughing. "Yeah, like a real
date. Assuming you want to go out on a real date with
me."

"Well, I don't know if I have anything to wear and I

was planning on washing my hair, but I suppose I can
rearrange my schedule."

Matt poked Christian in the ribs causing Christian to

squeak and stick his tongue out at Matt while jumping
out of Matt's reach. "No tickling."

Matt pretended to think about it for a minute before

conceding. "Okay, no tickling. Cooking." He looked
down at himself. "Pants first, though, I think." Matt

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winked at Christian and went to find clothes. Christian
followed a few moments later and practically bumped
into Matt as they passed in the living room.

"Lights, too." Matt paused to kiss Christian before

turning on a lamp on his way to the kitchen.

Matt started water boiling and hunted through the

cabinet for a jar of sauce. When Christian returned, he
held up the jar for approval. "You don't have any food
allergies or weird aversions do you?

"Nope, none. What are we having?"
"Mushrooms and garlic sauce. That work for you?
"Perfect. Can I do anything to help?"
"I think I have it under control. I'm a bachelor --

spaghetti and take out are my specialties." He dumped
the sauce into a pan and turned it on low to simmer.

He could feel Christian's eyes on him as he moved

around the kitchen, getting plates and silverware,
occasionally stirring the noodles and sauce. He'd chosen
the tight T-shirt he wore on purpose, knowing how well
it showed off his muscles, but he hadn't expected
Christian's gaze to be so distracting.

Finally running out of things to do while they waited

for the food to cook, Matt leaned against the counter and
looked over at Christian. "Have you registered for
classes next semester yet?"

Christian shook his head. "Not for a couple of weeks,

but I already know what I'm taking."

Christian filled in some more details about what

classes he was taking and what his recent exams had
been in.

"I tend to babble about stuff I'm interested in so just

stop me if I get boring," Christian said as they dished out
their spaghetti.

Matt shook his head, wanting to convince Christian

he really was interested. "No, I really do find it

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interesting. I'm not just pretending. I only got into
computers because I tested well and it was available
when I went in the service."

"So, if you could do it again, would you do it

differently?" Christian asked between bites of pasta.

Matt shrugged. "I don't know. I really didn't have a

clue what I wanted to do after high school and wasn't
really into spending more time in school, you know?"

"I take it you didn't like high school very much?"
Matt twirled his spaghetti around his fork. "It was

just something I had to do. I played sports, but I didn't
really run with that crowd. Mostly kept to myself,
studied, got good grades. Hung out with Sam and
Alison."

"What did you play?"
"Football and baseball. I ran track one year but I

hated it. Football was my favorite."

"Really? Somehow that doesn't surprise me. Or

maybe that's my own fantasy of you running around
with a bunch of sweaty guys."

"You're a perv."
"Maybe. You give me lots of material to work with."
They made short work of cleaning up and storing the

leftovers. Matt pulled Christian close and kissed him.

"Mm, tomato."
Matt laughed. "What do you want to do now that I've

fed you?"

"What time is it?"
They both looked at the clock on the microwave.

"Almost eleven," Matt said.

Christian fiddled with the hem of Matt's shirt. "I

guess I should go."

Neither of them made any move to separate.
"You could stay," Matt said finally.
"I could?"

Where You Least Expect It - 122

"You could. If you want."
Christian smiled. "Okay. Want to watch TV and

make out on the couch?"

Matt grinned. "You have excellent ideas." Holding

Christian's hand, he led the way into the living room. "I
still have that episode of Top Chef recorded."

"That works for me."
This time, instead of pretending they were just

hanging out, Matt pulled Christian close and let him curl
up against his side.

"Comfortable?" Matt asked.
"Yes, thank you. Did I mention that I like to

snuggle?"

"You did." Matt kissed the top of Christian's head

affectionately. Matt was pretty confident he liked it, too.
Especially when it was Christian curled up against his
side, warm and sleepy.

Where You Least Expect It - 123

Chapter Eleven

The warm body in his bed momentarily disconcerted

Matt. He rolled over and took a minute to watch
Christian sleeping beside him, hair mussed and blankets
half thrown off.

Even though it was well after nine, Matt didn't want

to disturb Christian. He expected to feel strange waking
up with someone in his bed -- particularly a man.
Instead, he liked having Christian around and didn't feel
pressured, unlike his experiences in the past.

Christian was starting to wake up, blinking open his

eyes and smiling at Matt.

Matt returned the smile and reached out to touch

Christian's jaw. "Morning, sleepyhead."

Christian nuzzled into Matt, almost purring.

"Morning."

Matt nuzzled him back and kissed along his jaw line.

"Sleep okay?"

"Mmm-hmm. You're warm and your bed's way nicer

than mine." Christian stretched, starting to wake up
enough to kiss Matt lightly. "You?"

"I did." He kissed Christian again, cock starting to

take an interest.

Christian pressed up against him. "Want to take a

shower? Get all wet and soapy?"

"That sounds like an excellent idea." After one last

kiss, Matt rolled out of bed before they got too
distracted.

Matt got the water running and Christian joined him

after a minute, hands sliding around Matt's waist and
mouth sucking up a mark on Matt's shoulder. Matt
rumbled happily and leaned back against Christian,
lacing their fingers together and enjoying the feel of the

Where You Least Expect It - 124

warm water cascading down his chest.

He could feel Christian's erection pressing against his

ass. He pressed back just enough for Christian to feel it.

Christian moaned softly as his hands caressed Matt's

chest and his hips rocked forward.

Matt let his head fall back as he reveled in the feeling

of Christian's hands touching his chest. He could feel
Christian's tongue and lips licking drops of water from
his skin and he turned so he could steal a taste of
Christian's mouth.

Matt captured Christian's mouth and used his hands

on Christian's ass to push their erections together.
Christian rocked against him for a minute before pulling
back and reaching for the soap, lathering Matt's chest,
shoulders, and belly.

Christian traced the curve of Matt's hip and down to

the tops of Matt's thighs.

Their tongues tangled wetly, water pouring around

them. Matt took the soap from Christian and ran his
hands over Christian's body, following the paths of the
bubbles as they ran down Christian's chest.

Matt moaned as Christian cupped his testicles with

soapy hands and slicked the soft skin behind Matt's
balls, shivering as Christian's fingers moved further
back, almost but not quite touching his hole. After
teasing Matt, Christian wrapped a hand around Matt's
cock and slowly started jerking him, still kissing him
and sucking on his lower lip.

Matt breathed heavily, suddenly achingly hot. The

soap made Christian's hand slide easily up and down
Matt's cock, made it easy for Matt to thrust through
Christian's fist. His own hands were still moving
roughly over Christian's chest, fingers digging in
slightly. Christian pushed into the touches, grip
tightening as Matt teased a nipple.

Where You Least Expect It - 125

"God, Matt, I want you."
Matt's whole body was on fire. Christian was still

jacking Matt slowly, running his thumb over the head
and the sensitive skin just below it. Matt reached up and
wrapped one hand around Christian's neck, thumb
stroking his pulse point, while reaching for Christian's
hard-on with the other, fingers finding slick precome
and soap. Christian whimpered.

"Oh, fuck yes, so fucking hot, so hard for me. Can't

believe how much you want it." Matt tried to match the
pace of Christian's hand on his cock, slow and firm,
enough to make his balls ache but not enough to make
him come.

"I want it. I want it bad." Christian leaned his

forehead against Matt's chest, watching them jerk each
other. His hand slid around Matt's ass, teasing along the
crease.

"Tell me." Matt was so hot he was going to come,

just like this, standing in the shower stroking each other
slowly.

Christian let out a long groan, panting out his words.

"I want... everything. I love when you touch me. I want
to feel your mouth on me, sucking me." Christian was
shaking and Matt could feel that he was close. They
started to move faster, hips rocking. "I want you to fuck
me, Matt, want you inside me."

The words alone would have been enough to make

Matt lose it, but the combination of Christian's hands on
him, stroking his cock and teasing his ass, and the heat
and pure need behind the words pushed Matt over the
edge. He tried to keep jerking Christian as he came,
wanting Christian with him.

When Matt's head started to clear, he realized that

Christian was still leaning against him. He let go of
Christian's cock and wrapped around him, holding him

Where You Least Expect It - 126

loosely as the water sluiced over them, rinsing away the
come. Christian leaned up and kissed Matt's chin. "I
think I like waking up with you."

Matt chuckled. "We should get clean and try to find

some food."

Christian stretched, wrapping his arms around Matt's

neck. "Good plan."

They shared kisses and touches, cleaning up quickly.

Matt shut the water off and handed Christian a towel.

"Do you want me to see if I have a T-shirt that might

fit you?"

Christian shrugged. "If you can, but it's no big deal.

We can head to my place after we eat." Christian pulled
on his boxers and jeans and flopped down on the bed,
lying on his stomach and watching Matt dig through the
dresser drawers, finally pulling out an old blue T-shirt.

"This hasn't fit me in a while. Here." He tossed it at

Christian, who rolled into a sitting position and pulled
the T-shirt on. It was still a little big, but it mostly fit,
and it was clean.

"What do you want to do for breakfast? There really

isn't much food here."

Christian made a face. "If we're going out, something

not too expensive. I'm a poor college student,
remember."

Matt walked into the bathroom to mess with his hair.

"I can buy breakfast." He tried to make it nonchalant,
but he was feeling a little like he was in new territory.
He was never very good at navigating the whole who-
should-pay subject and now it had a new twist.

Christian waited to respond until Matt came back into

the bedroom. "You don't have to, you know."

"I know. I want to. It's not... charity or whatever, and

it's not because I feel like I have to. I know I make more
than you do and I don't have a problem spending it."

Where You Least Expect It - 127

Christian looked at him thoughtfully for a minute.

"Okay. I don't want to take advantage of you, though."

Matt grinned. "You can just make up for it later."
"Sex in exchange for breakfast, huh? Isn't that

illegal?"

Matt laughed and pulled Christian to his feet.

"Maybe. Come on, I'm starving."

He led Christian into the living room. "So, what do

you like?"

"Dude, did I mention I'm a poor starving college

student who thinks a cheeseburger is a treat? I'll eat
pretty much anything."

Matt took their jackets out of the coat closet and

handed over Christian's. Matt mentioned the name of his
usual breakfast place and Christian agreed. "I love their
bacon." Christian started to unlock the door but Matt
stopped him.

"Wait. I don't think I'm ready for public displays of

affection, so we should do this first." He leaned down
and kissed Christian thoroughly. When Matt stepped
back, he laughed at the slightly dazed look on Christian's
face. "We can go now."

Christian blinked. "Oh, right."

***

"How was everything?" the server asked, bringing

them the check.

"Excellent, thanks." Matt passed over his debit card.

He usually liked eating by himself because he got to
read the paper and settle into his weekend, but he found
he enjoyed the time with Christian at least as much.
Maybe more.

Matt turned back and caught Christian trying to

watch him inconspicuously.

Where You Least Expect It - 128

"What?" Matt asked.
Christian shook his head. "Nothing." He fiddled with

a random crumb on the table. "So I guess we should
head back to your place so I can get my bike." It
sounded more like a question than a statement to Matt.

"Right. Do you need to leave? I didn't even ask if you

were working, did I?"

Christian smiled at him. "No, you didn't, and yeah, I

have to go in from three to ten. A couple of people have
already headed home for Christmas break, so I'm
picking up extra shifts this week."

Christmas. Shit, Matt hadn't even thought about that

yet. "Are you staying here for Christmas?"

"No, I'll head home on the twenty-third. My parents

really want me to stay through New Year's, so I
probably won't be back until the third. I hate missing the
work, but I want to avoid the argument, you know?
What are you doing for the holiday?"

"I have no idea," Matt said honestly. "I mean, I don't

have family and last year I was still with Katie. Sam's
mom usually invites me over, so I might do that, but it
might seem a little odd. I don't know."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up something

awkward."

The waitress brought Matt's debit slip back for him to

sign and left them alone again.

"No, it's fine. You ready?" Matt didn't want Christian

to feel the need to tiptoe around him.

"Yeah, sure." Christian took a last swallow of his

coffee and stood to follow Matt out of the restaurant.

"I can drive you to work if you want," Matt offered.
Christian looked at Matt out of the corner of his eye.

"Yeah? Trying to keep me around for a few more
hours?"

"Maybe."

Where You Least Expect It - 129

"You'll have to pick me up, too."
"I can do that. Maybe I'll even buy food and feed you

again later."

"Cool." Christian smiled and shoved his hands in his

pocket, matching Matt's pace as they walked back to the
condo.

***

It was Tuesday before they were able to see each

other again. Once safely behind closed doors, Matt
grabbed Christian for a kiss, cold lips warming up
quickly.

Matt pulled back finally. "Hey," he said softly.
"Hey." Christian smiled happily, checks and nose red

from the cold.

"I should change." Matt was still wearing his work

clothes.

"Okay." Neither of them made any move to separate.
Matt kissed Christian again, finally pulling back. "I'll

be right back."

"I'll be here."
Matt changed into jeans and a sweater and took a

quick look around the bedroom. Of course, it was
spotless.

When he got back to the living room, Christian was

sitting on the couch flipping through one of the books
Matt left on the coffee table. Christian smiled up at him.

"I have food. Want to help me cook?" "Nurturing"

wasn't a word anyone would have used to describe Matt,
but here he was, shopping so that Christian would eat
decent food and worrying about Christian bike riding at
night.

Christian stood and put his arms around Matt's waist,

seeming to take Matt's offer to eat a home cooked meal

Where You Least Expect It - 130

in stride. "Sure. But first I want to kiss you again." He
leaned up and kissed Matt, slowly sucking on Matt's
lower lip.

Matt returned the embrace, and the kiss, lips parting

to pull Christian's tongue into his mouth and swallowing
Christian's moan.

Christian's stomach rumbled at almost the same

moment. Matt laughed and Christian buried his face in
Matt's chest. "Sorry."

"It's okay. Let's make dinner. We can make out later."
"I certainly hope so." Christian looked expectant.
Matt gave Christian one last quick kiss before leading

the way into the kitchen.

"So, um." Matt paused, wondering if Christian would

find this weird. "I picked up some chicken and a couple
of other things at the store. I thought maybe we could do
chicken and potatoes. I even got some cans of
vegetables."

Christian was smiling at him again. "That sounds

fabulous. What do you want me to do?"

Just like last time, Matt found he liked cooking with

Christian. The little kisses and touches certainly didn't
detract from things, either.

They tried to watch TV while dinner cooked but were

making out on the couch when the kitchen timer buzzed.
Matt was glad he hadn't tried to rely on his ability to
watch the clock or they would be eating overcooked
chicken.

They chatted through dinner and cleaning up, trading

stories about Matt's job and Christian's upcoming
classes. They ended up ignoring the television again.

"Been thinking about you." Matt kissed Christian's

ear and was rewarded with a shiver.

"Yeah? What about me?" Christian stretched to give

Matt better access to his neck.

Where You Least Expect It - 131

"About you sucking me. About how fucking good it

feels. Keep thinking about what you said in the shower."
He moved his hand down to rub Christian's erection.
"Can I suck you?" He felt Christian's dick throb at the
words.

"Oh, shit. Are you sure?"
"I am. I keep thinking about it. I want to know what

it's like, what you taste like."

Christian groaned, a long and pleading sound. "Matt.

Love the things you say."

"Yeah? You like it when I tell you that I can't stop

thinking about your mouth on me? I touch myself and
think about my cock sliding in and out of your mouth.
About what it would be like to do that to you." Matt
started nibbling on Christian's Adam's apple, moving
down and running his teeth over Christian's T-shirt
covered nipple.

Christian groaned. "Good."
Matt slid his hand lower to cup Christian's balls

briefly before sitting up and pulling Christian's T-shirt
off, baring the smooth chest. He moaned when he saw
one of the marks he'd sucked onto Christian's stomach
the other night.

Christian slid down on the couch, legs spreading for

Matt. Matt moved his hand back to Christian's cock,
rubbing a couple of times before relenting and
unbuttoning Christian's jeans like they both wanted. He
leaned up and kissed Christian again before pulling off
his sweater.

Christian moaned and dropped his hand to his own

cock.

Matt knelt on the floor in front of Christian, pulling

Christian's jeans off on the way and watching Christian
stroke himself for a minute before taking over. Matt
kissed Christian's thighs, nuzzled and licked Christian's

Where You Least Expect It - 132

balls, drawing out more needy sounds.

"Matt." Christian spread his legs wider.
Matt looked up as he sucked on Christian's balls.
"Oh, fuck, Matt. That's the hottest thing I've ever

seen."

"Is it?" Matt asked before licking around the base of

Christian's cock.

"Oh, God. Suck me, honey, please."
Matt kept licking Christian's cock, slowly moving up

the length before gripping the base so he could wrap his
lips around the head.

Christian moaned loudly.
Matt slid his mouth down Christian's cock, letting

himself adjust to the girth and the flavor. Matt couldn't
go as deep as Christian could, but he compensated with
his hands and tongue.

He chanced a glance up at Christian, whose head was

thrown back, eyes shut tight, lips slightly parted on a
moan, rocking gently.

Matt kept sucking and licking, bringing Christian

closer to the edge. He could taste the precome leaking
from Christian's cock and concentrated on getting more
and making Christian's moans louder.

"Matt. God, close. Soon."
Matt kept sucking, using Christian's moans to guide

him. He felt Christian's cock get even harder before
starting to pulse, hot come shooting out over his tongue.
He was momentarily startled, but swallowed all of it.

Matt kept licking through the aftershocks, just like

Christian had done for him, careful not to over
stimulate. When he looked up to meet Christian's
slightly dazed expression, he felt suddenly self-
conscious.

He swallowed. He knew there was no such thing as

bad head, but still. "Was that good?"

Where You Least Expect It - 133

Christian smiled brightly. "That was amazing. When

I can move, I'll return the favor."

Matt laughed and kissed Christian's hip before

settling himself on the couch. He pulled Christian into
his arms and kissed spiky hair. His own cock was
pushing insistently against his zipper, throbbing in time
with his heartbeat as he waited for Christian to recover.

Christian's hand moved up Matt's thigh to his

erection. Matt couldn't hold back his groan. Christian
twisted to suck on Matt's nipple, drawing it into a tight
peak.

"Christian," Matt pleaded; he might have been

embarrassed if he had been less turned on.

"Don't worry, honey, I'll take care of you." Christian

opened Matt's pants and pushed them out of the way,
lowering his head and sucking Matt in deep.

Matt cursed and thrust forward, trying to pull his

jeans the rest of the way down. Christian helped, getting
his jeans low enough to fondle Matt's balls while
sucking him off.

Matt didn't last long. He'd been horny all day and

waiting through dinner had only made him more eager.
Christian swallowed around him as he came, gentling as
Matt's orgasm subsided. Christian licked the last drops
of come from Matt's prick before moving up to curl
against his chest again.

They sat there together dozing slightly, Christian

drawing random patterns on Matt's chest as Matt rubbed
his hand along Christian's arm.

"Want to go to bed?" Matt finally asked.
"Hmm. Okay." Christian stretched and stood up,

pulling Matt along with him.

They both laughed when Matt's jeans fell down

around his ankles as he stood, almost tripping him. Matt
finished stripping and picked up his clothes before

Where You Least Expect It - 134

heading into the bedroom.

Christian followed a minute later with his clothes and

backpack. He blushed when Matt looked at him with a
raised brow.

"I figured I might end up staying and brought clothes

for tomorrow. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, you know, it actually is." They crawled into

bed together, kissing softly.

"It's kind of early to be going to sleep," Matt pointed

out.

"Yeah, I noticed that, actually. Want to make out

again?"

"Definitely."
All in all, Matt thought it was a damned fine way to

end a Tuesday.

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Chapter Twelve

Later that week, Matt let Sam prevail on him to spend

Christmas Day at Sam's mom's house, but that didn't
stop him from waiting up until after midnight for
Christian to call Christmas Eve.

"Hey, I'm sorry it's so late. Mom had a ton of stuff for

me to do and I kept thinking I was going to get time, and
I didn't, and then there was this thing at my aunt's house,
and I know it's only been a day but I miss you."

Matt laughed at the rush of words. "I miss you, too.

And it's okay that it's late; I'm just glad I got to talk to
you. Are you having fun at least?"

He could almost hear Christian's shrug. "Mostly. I've

got family stuff all day tomorrow, but Trent and I will
probably manage to shut ourselves up in my basement
and play video games on Friday, which will be cool."

The tiniest ripple of jealousy went through Matt.

"Yeah? That sounds like fun. How was the drive?"

Christian picked up on it. "You're jealous!"
"I am not!" Matt's protest may have been a bit louder

than he anticipated.

Christian laughed. "I think it's sweet. And don't

worry, I don't plan on screwing around with Trent."

"I know. I just... I don't want to come between the

two of you."

"Now you're being silly. You're not. And you won't.

And I don't want him to come between us, either."

"He won't." Matt missed Christian and was

disappointed they couldn't spend the holiday together,
but didn't feel threatened by Trent.

"Good. How was work? No one came up with some

crazy project for you, did they?"

Matt wondered if he spent too much time

Where You Least Expect It - 136

complaining about his job. "Work was remarkably quiet.
I got out at four."

"Oh, cool." Christian yawned loudly. "Shit, I'm

sorry."

"It's okay, it's late. You should get some sleep." Matt

didn't want Christian to fall asleep during his family
Christmas.

"I'd rather talk to you, but you're probably right. Can

I call you tomorrow?"

"Absolutely. Leave a message if I don't answer. And

have a Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, honey."
It was only after he ended the call that Matt

registered Christian's use of "honey" when they weren't
having sex. He thought maybe he didn't mind it.

***

On Christmas, Sam made a couple of comments

about what a good mood Matt was in; Matt tried to blow
it off, which worked for the most part. He had fun with
Sam's family, exchanged a few gifts, teased Sam's sister,
ate too much. He and Sam both dodged questions about
whom they were dating.

Matt talked with Christian every day, however

briefly. Christian complained about being away through
New Year's, but Matt convinced him to spend the time
with his family. Although not saying so, Matt wasn't
sure they should be rearranging their holidays for each
other just yet. Christian relented, admitting that his
dependence on Trent for a ride was the deciding factor.
Christian promised to call when he got back to town on
Saturday.

Matt spent New Year's Eve at Riley's with Sam and a

woman named Leah. Like most of Sam's girlfriends,

Where You Least Expect It - 137

they had nothing in common, but Matt wasn't as
bothered by it as he usually was.

The surprise text he received from Christian shortly

after midnight made him smile.

"Who's sending you text messages at midnight?" Sam

was suddenly at his shoulder.

Shit. Matt snapped his cell phone closed. "No one.

It's nothing."

Sam looked at him with narrowed eyes. "Who is

she?"

"What?"
"Oh, come on," Sam gave him a knowing look.

"You've got that whole happy distracted I'm-getting-
laid-look. Who is she?"

Matt hadn't realized he was being quite so

transparent. "No one," he repeated. "Trust me, there is
no woman." That much, at least, was the truth.

"Fine, be that way. But I will figure it out, you

know."

Matt tried to laugh it off, consoled by the fact that

Sam would almost certainly never figure out whom Matt
was sleeping with.

Saturday night found Matt waiting for Christian to

call and confirm their plans for Sunday.

When the phone rang right around eleven, Matt

answered on the second ring. "Hi."

"Hey. Um, so, I know it's late, but I'm here."

Christian sounded tired.

"Back at your apartment?" Matt asked.
"No, I mean I'm here. Downstairs. Can I come up? If

not, Trent's still here, so it's not a big deal if you're tired
or whatever."

Matt cut Christian off before he could continue

babbling. "No, it's fine. I'm still awake. I'll let you in."

"Awesome." Christian clicked off and Matt only had

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to wait a second before the buzzer sounded. Christian
must have been pretty sure Matt would welcome him.
Matt let him in and opened the door into the hallway,
waiting for Christian to make it upstairs.

Matt smiled as soon as Christian walked off the

elevator, lugging his duffel bag and backpack behind
him. He looked slightly rumpled from spending five
hours in a car, but Matt thought he looked great.

Matt closed and locked the door as Christian dropped

his bags in the spot usually reserved for his bike.

"Hey."
"Hey." Christian moved immediately into Matt's

arms, letting Matt kiss him before cuddling in for a hug,
relaxing in Matt's embrace. "Fuck, I missed this."

"Me, too. Are you hungry? Or just tired?"
"We stopped on the road. I really just want to go

snuggle and fall asleep, if that's cool." Christian looked
cautious, as if he was concerned that Matt might be
expecting more.

"That sounds excellent." Matt kissed him again. "Go

ahead in, I just want to shut the lights and stuff off."

Christian grinned tiredly. "Okay." He kissed Matt

before slipping out of Matt's arms and heading into the
bedroom.

Christian was already under the covers when Matt

joined him.

Christian was immediately in his arms, head pillowed

on Matt's shoulder and arm wrapped around Matt's
waist. Matt settled the blankets around them and let
himself relax with his lover.

***

Matt woke up to the feeling of Christian's mouth on

his chest, tongue trailing along the outlines of his

Where You Least Expect It - 139

muscles. Matt stretched and rumbled, reaching out to
stroke Christian's hair. Christian slowly moved up the
length of Matt's chest to kiss his lips.

"Morning," Christian greeted him.
"Morning. Been awake long?"
"Long enough." Christian pushed his morning

erection into Matt's thigh. "Got any plans for the day?"

Matt rolled them over. "I can probably come up with

something." He pressed Christian into the bed.

Three hours later, they were lying on the couch

watching football and digesting breakfast as rain
pounded against the windows and the wind howled
loudly. Christian was practically asleep on Matt's chest.

"So, I know we didn't talk about it or anything, but I

got you something for Christmas."

Christian's head popped up. "Really. Cool, 'cause I

might have gotten you something, too."

Matt smiled at him. "If you want to get off me, I'll

even go get it."

"I don't know, you are awfully comfortable, but I

guess I can make an exception for presents."

Christian climbed off the couch and headed over to

his bag. Matt watched him for a second before getting
Christian's present out of the coat closet.

Christian dropped back down on the couch and

looked as though he was barely restraining himself from
bouncing as he waited for Matt to sit back down.

"So, uh, you were talking about this a couple of

weeks ago and you didn't mention getting it from your
family, so I thought I'd take a chance. We can always
exchange it if you want." Matt handed Christian his gift.

"Okay." He handed Matt a brightly wrapped package.

"I hope you like it."

Matt watched as Christian tore into his present -- a

new game for his console system that Matt had lucked

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upon. "Oh, wow, you found it! You rock!" Now
Christian was bouncing, looking like a little kid. "Thank
you." He leaned forward to give Matt a kiss. "Open
yours."

Matt took another kiss. "You're welcome. Are you

going to wait to play it, or do I have to take you home
now?" Matt teased.

"I guess I can wait." Christian grinned and pointed at

the present Matt held. "Open!"

Matt laughed. "Okay, okay." Matt looked at the

wrapping carefully. "I like the paper."

"Matt! Stop torturing me!" Christian said

dramatically.

Matt kept laughing at Christian as he opened the

paper with slightly more control than Christian had
shown, finally revealing an AC/DC box set, complete
with DVD. "Oh, Christian, this is awesome. I've been
wanting to get this forever."

"You like it?" Christian looked so happy that Matt

had to kiss him again.

"I love it. I'll put it on in a minute." Matt tangled his

fingers in the hair at the nape of Christian's neck and
leaned down for a kiss, tongue slipping out to taste
Christian's lip. Christian purred and teased back,
drawing a soft moan from Matt.

Matt chuckled and pulled away. "Hold that thought."

He got up and moved to the stereo system, putting the
discs into the CD changer.

Christian curled back up against his chest as soon as

Matt sat back down. All in all, not a bad way to spend a
belated Christmas.

Where You Least Expect It - 141

Chapter Thirteen

Matt knew Christian was anticipating a heavier

workload during the upcoming Winter quarter. Their
relationship was all still so new, Matt wasn't sure how
things would end up, but he was prepared to work
around Christian's schedule as much as he could. He met
Christian by the bike rack after work on Tuesday.

"How were classes?" Matt asked, making a conscious

effort to make sure Christian knew he was interested.

"Good. It's going to be a lot of work."
Matt picked Christian's bike up and loaded it into the

back of his truck before getting behind the wheel. "We
can either go shopping or I can treat you to dinner to
celebrate the new quarter."

Christian stretched his legs out. "Let's see, a home

cooked meal or dinner out. I think I opt for eating out. If
this quarter ends up as busy as I expect, I might as well
take advantage of it while I can. How about Thai?"

"We can do Thai. Can I take you home with me

later?"

Christian looked at him sideways. "Maybe. If you're

lucky."

"Well, I'm hoping to get lucky."
Christian laughed again. "Like I said, you better take

advantage of me before I get sucked into studying
constantly."

"Are you still on track to graduate after Spring

quarter?"

"Should be," Christian answered before changing the

subject.

Dinner was quick; Christian seemed just as eager as

Matt to get back to the condo.

Christian dropped his backpack inside Matt's door

Where You Least Expect It - 142

and turned for a kiss. "I've been waiting to do that for
hours."

"Sorry."
"It's okay. I get that you're not ready to be out in

public yet. It kind of makes me appreciate it more."

"Until it starts to become an issue." Matt knew in the

back of his mind that it would become an issue at some
point. He knew it wasn't fair to ask Christian to hide
their relationship; Christian was used to being out and
would likely grow tired of pretending.

Christian cut into his thoughts. "Let's not worry about

it yet, okay? I think you were planning on getting
lucky?"

"I'm hoping. It's been since Sunday, after all." Matt

leaned down to kiss him, hands stroking Christian's back
and making him moan softly.

"Couch or bed?" Matt asked.
Christian pressed close. "Bed. More room to play."

Christian turned and picked up his bag, blushing. "I,
um." He bit his lip, "I brought condoms."

Matt thought he might have blushed, too. "Oh.

Okay." Holding out a hand for Christian, he drew
Christian into the bedroom. Christian followed easily,
crossing to the other side of the bed and placing the
condoms on the nightstand within easy reach.

Matt watched, vaguely amused at Christian's

embarrassment considering Christian was the more
experienced one. Matt was less nervous than he
expected.

Matt pulled the blankets back and knelt in the center

of the bed, reaching out for Christian. He moved easily
into Matt's arms, smiling, but still blushing, letting Matt
kiss him, pull off his T-shirt, and open his jeans, rubbing
lightly at Christian's erection. Christian moaned as Matt
massaged the sensitive skin underneath the head.

Where You Least Expect It - 143

Matt pushed Christian's jeans and boxers down below

Christian's hips, rubbing and squeezing his ass.

Christian kissed him hungrily, tongue stroking Matt's

roughly, hips grinding against Matt's. "Matt," the word
almost a plea.

"God, you're fucking hot." Matt pulled his own shirt

off, tossing it over his shoulder. He grunted when
Christian's mouth landed on one of his nipples, sucking
and licking before switching to the other one.

"Oh, yeah, so good, Christian. Love when you do

that." Christian rubbed his hand over the bulge in Matt's
jeans. Christian unfastened Matt's pants, pulling them
down, dipping his head and sucking gently on Matt's
penis. Matt groaned when Christian pulled off and lay
down, stroking himself.

"Touch me, Matt. Please."
Matt made a strangled sound in the back of his throat,

dropping down half on top of Christian and kissing
Christian, letting his hand roam across Christian's chest
and hips. Christian's legs moved restlessly. Matt stopped
what he was doing long enough to finish stripping both
of them. He kissed his way back up Christian's body,
keeping most of his weight on his arms so as to not
crush the smaller man.

He paused from kissing Christian long enough to say,

"You have to tell me what to do, babe."

"You're doing a really good job so far." Christian

kept kissing Matt as he reached for the lube. "Watch
me." He pushed at Matt's shoulders until Matt was
kneeling between Christian's legs.

Matt watched as Christian spread the lube on his

fingers and pulled one of his knees up to give himself
access. He reached down and slowly started stroking the
skin behind his balls, moving further back and circling
his hole before pushing one finger in.

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Matt groaned out loud, enthralled by the sight of

Christian lying with his legs spread, sliding a slick
finger in and out of his ass, then adding a second finger
along with the first.

Matt tore his eyes away from Christian's ass to steal a

look at Christian's face.

Christian was stretched out on the bed, a thin sheen

of sweat on his chest and belly. His eyes were hot as he
watched Matt watching him.

Christian handed over the lube. "Slick your fingers."
Matt fumbled with the tube, finally getting it open

and spreading some of the cool liquid on his fingers. At
Christian's encouragement, Matt slowly slipped one
finger inside Christian.

Christian moaned. "More. You won't hurt me."
Matt added another finger, slowly fucking Christian.

Christian's whole body jerked and he swore as Matt
found his prostate. Christian started writhing, humping
Matt's hand as Matt moved gently inside Christian, not
really knowing how much was enough or too much,
using Christian's movements and sounds as a guide.

His own cock was leaking and throbbing, aching to

be inside Christian.

"Another." Christian gasped.
Matt spread more lube and added a third finger,

feeling Christian's muscles flutter and clench around
him. Matt moaned as Christian ground down on his
hand.

"God, Matt. So good. Will you fuck me? Please, I

want to feel you inside me."

Matt stilled his hand, gently withdrawing his fingers

and reaching for the box of condoms. He rolled one on
quickly, the friction of his fingers on his dick making
him moan.

Christian grabbed his legs behind the knees. "In me.

Where You Least Expect It - 145

Please."

"Like this?" Matt leaned over Christian, lining his

cock up and pressing in.

"Oh! Yeah." Christian shifted impatiently.
Matt slid the rest of the way inside, holding himself

still, feeling the incredible heat of Christian's ass
surrounding his cock. He found Christian's mouth with
his, sucking on Christian's tongue hungrily as he started
to thrust, slowly at first. Christian moaned into his
mouth, meeting Matt's thrusts. Matt felt Christian's legs
wrap around his waist, fingers digging into Matt's back.
Christian's urgent movements pushed Matt to increase
his speed.

"Fuck, yes, like that."
Matt stared down at Christian, holding his weight on

his hands and thrusting into Christian.

"Harder. Fuck me."
"Fuck, fuck. Tight." Matt started thrusting harder,

faster, slamming his hard cock into Christian.

Christian reached down and started stroking himself

in time with Matt's thrusts, babbling about how good it
was, how hot.

Christian's muscles clamped down on Matt's dick as

Christian came, jerking himself furiously and shouting.

Matt thrust twice more before going still, his cock

pulsing as he came.

Christian dropped his legs down, lying pliant beneath

Matt. After tossing the condom, Matt collapsed next to
him, both of them still breathing hard.

"That was amazing." Christian gasped out.
"Fuck." Matt wasn't at his most articulate.
Christian chuckled. "So you wouldn't be adverse to

trying it again?"

Matt finally managed to turn his head and look over

at Christian. He was a little bit stunned by just how good

Where You Least Expect It - 146

it felt to be inside Christian, somehow more intense than
what he was used to, but he didn't have the brain cells to
figure it out just then. "We can definitely do that again.
Give me about ten minutes."

Christian laughed and rolled over toward Matt, lying

his head on Matt's shoulder and yawning.

Matt wrapped an arm around Christian, holding him

close. "You're okay?"

"More than okay. Did I mention that was amazing?"
"You might have." Matt grinned, relieved that he

hadn't been too rough.

They lay there together for a while before Christian

stirred. "I should get some reading done. Do you mind?"

"Nope. You going to read in here or in the living

room?"

"Living room, I think. Want to keep me company for

a bit?"

"You mean I have to move?"
Christian laughed and kissed Matt. "Yep." He found

his jeans and T-shirt, grabbed his bag and headed back
into the living room.

Matt dragged himself from the bed, found his own

clothes, and followed, settling next to Christian on the
couch.

***

They quickly found their routine again. Christian

spent most of his time at Matt's, laptop and books taking
up a semi-permanent place on Matt's coffee table.

That led to the inevitable misunderstandings as Matt

tried to incorporate Christian into his life.

"You can use the desk in the guest room to study."

Matt thought the offer was innocent enough and was
surprised when Christian stiffened.

Where You Least Expect It - 147

"I didn't realize I was in your way," he said flatly.
"I'm just trying to be nice, Christian."
"No, don't worry about it, I can leave."
What the hell? "When did I say I wanted you to

leave?"

"You said you don't want me studying in your living

room."

"No, damn it, I didn't say that! I said I can set up the

fucking den so you can study in there so you have some
quiet and not get distracted by me or the TV or
whatever."

"I -- oh." Christian blinked and tilted his head.

"Really?"

It was impossible for Matt to stay mad when

Christian looked at him like that. "Really. I like having
you here, Christian."

"Oh. Okay. Sorry. I'm not usually such a freak. Um,

is it okay that I like staying in here with you? I mean, I
might change my mind, but I like the company."

Matt kissed him. "I like it too." Matt settled back on

the couch with his book while Christian went back to
studying.

***

As Matt found himself spending several nights a

week and most weekends with Christian, he spent less
time with Sam and Alison, although he still took regular
coffee breaks with Alison. She never mentioned the fact
that he was even less social than normal, nor did she
raise the question of his friendship with Christian again.
Sam, oddly enough, pressed Matt less frequently about
going to parties and didn't argue when Matt said he had
plans.

It was clear from their conversation at New Year's

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that Sam thought Matt had a girlfriend. Even as private
as he was, Matt hated keeping things from Sam. He felt
like he was sneaking around, which was exactly what he
was doing. His relationship with Christian was the first
serious thing Matt had ever withheld from his best
friend.

Matt also knew Christian was starting to realize

something was troubling him when Christian crawled
into bed at one-thirty and Matt was still awake.

"What's wrong, honey?" Christian curled up along

Matt's side and kissed his shoulder.

Matt shifted and put his arm around Christian.

"Nothing. Just can't sleep." Matt nuzzled Christian.
"Maybe you can help."

"Hmmm," Christian almost purred. "You mean by

doing something other than making you talk about why
you're still awake."

"Maybe I was waiting up for you."
Christian grinned and leaned over Matt, stroking

Matt's hair. "Yeah? You miss me when I'm not in bed
with you?"

Matt tried to hide his smile. "Maybe."
Christian giggled. "Well, I'm here now." Christian

kissed him, making Matt forget his stress for the
moment. Christian settled more firmly against him and
kissed Matt with great thoroughness, slowly licking and
sucking on his lips, his chin and jaw, taking great care to
make Matt melt into the kisses.

Matt let Christian lead the kiss before starting to kiss

back just as slowly. He stroked his hand slowly up and
down Christian's arm, feeling firm muscles underneath
incredibly soft skin. He sucked along Christian's jaw,
reveling in the freedom to do this, to lie in bed and just
kiss and touch without any pressure or expectations.

Christian kissed his way slowly along Matt's neck

Where You Least Expect It - 149

and chest as his hand wandered lower.

"Christian," he moaned softly, legs moving restlessly.
"Yeah, honey?" His fingers trailed lightly through

Matt's pubic hair.

Matt groaned. "Do you know what you do to me?"
Christian sucked on his rib cage. "Uh-huh." The hand

that was torturing him moved to his balls, making Matt
gasp as Christian rolled them slowly. "I think I turn you
on."

"God, yes." Matt wasn't sure if he was responding to

Christian's words or touch.

Christian pushed the blankets the rest of the way

down so he could continue the journey with his mouth
along Matt's navel and hip bones. Finally, he relented a
little and licked a wet stripe up the length of Matt's cock,
pulling more moans from Matt. Christian teased the slit,
licking up a drop of precome.

Watching Christian suck him was still one of the

hottest things Matt had ever seen. Enjoyment obvious,
Christian made sure Matt got a good look at his cock
sliding in and out of Christian's mouth before beginning
to suck in earnest, taking Matt deep and swallowing.
Matt moaned and placed his hands on Christian's
shoulders, slowly thrusting in and out. He wanted to
make it last, but it was so good that he felt his balls pull
up as his orgasm crashed through him.

Christian kept sucking until the last of the aftershocks

had subsided. When Christian kissed him, Matt could
taste his own come in Christian's mouth, making him
moan. "God, that's hot."

Christian grinned and kissed him again as Matt

reached for Christian's cock only to find it already soft
and sticky with come.

He stretched his neck so he could look at Christian.

"Were you humping the bed again?"

Where You Least Expect It - 150

Christian buried his head on Matt's chest. "Maybe."
Matt laughed. "You're insatiable."
"You love it."
"Maybe," Matt echoed.
Christian laughed and gave Matt another kiss. "I'm

sticky." He crawled out of bed and headed into the
bathroom. "I think we need to buy more towels."

Matt cocked an eyebrow. "We do?"
He could tell Christian was blushing.
"You need to buy more towels?" He cleaned up the

come on the sheet and tossed the towel back in the
direction of the bathroom.

"Come here."
Christian pulled the blankets up around them and

curled back into Matt's arms, settling down sleepily.

"Thanks, babe." Matt kissed Christian's temple.
"Anytime."

***

Matt woke a few hours later from his first nightmare

in weeks. It wasn't as bad as some, but it disturbed his
sleep enough that he needed to get up and distract
himself. Thankfully, he hadn't woken Christian.

Christian found him in the living room a little while

later. "Hey," Christian said sleepily as he sat down next
to Matt.

Damn. He didn't want to talk about this. "Hey."
"What's wrong?" Matt felt Christian's hand on his

arm.

"Nothing." Maybe Christian would take the hint and

go back to bed.

"You seem really upset, Matt. Do you want to talk?"
"Look, I said nothing's wrong. Go back to bed." The

words came out harsher than Matt intended, but they had

Where You Least Expect It - 151

the desired effect.

"Fine. You don't have to get all snarky at me for

being concerned."

Feeling like an ass, Matt briefly considered following

Christian to apologize. But that would only lead to
questions Matt wasn't ready to answer.

Morning came quickly; Matt managed to doze a little

on the couch but was wide awake well before his alarm.
He was already showered and getting dressed when
Christian rolled over. "Time is it?"

"Almost seven. If you want a ride home, get ready."
Christian yawned. "It's early."
Matt didn't respond, but Christian kept asking

questions.

"Did you sleep at all?"
"I'm fine, Christian."
Christian sat up, concern clear on his face. "Matt.

Don't shut me out."

That just pissed Matt off more. "What the fuck are

you talking about? I told you, there's nothing wrong."

"Matt --"
Matt cut him off. "Do you want a ride home or not?"
Christian sighed. "Okay, yeah. Can you wait until I

get dressed?"

"I'll be in the living room."
Matt left the bedroom without giving Christian a

chance to respond. He waited impatiently, eager to drop
Christian off and get to work without any drama.

"I just need my books." Christian wasn't looking at

him, but Matt nodded anyway. Neither of them spoke
until Matt pulled up in front of Christian's apartment.

"So, should I meet you after work or do you want to

call me?" It was the first time in weeks either of them
had explicitly made plans about meeting after work and
Matt grabbed the opportunity.

Where You Least Expect It - 152

"I'll call you."
"Okay." Christian leaned over and kissed Matt's

check. "Have a good day."

Matt didn't go out for coffee in the afternoon and he

stayed late at work to avoid running into Christian,
feeling cowardly even as he did it. He knew he was
intentionally shutting Christian out to avoid an
uncomfortable conversation -- and he knew doing so
would probably increase his stress and make the
nightmares worse, but he didn't seem to have the energy
to stop himself.

He saw Christian's name flash on his Caller ID

around seven-thirty, but he let it go to voicemail. It took
another two days of avoidance for Christian to show up
at the condo unannounced.

Matt answered the buzzer reluctantly, knowing it was

either Sam or Christian, and not wanting to see either of
them.

"Hey. It's me. Can I come up?" Christian sounded

hopeful even through the tinny speaker.

"Now's not a good time."
Christian's response surprised Matt. "Alright, you

know what, fine. It's not a good time. I won't stay, I just
need to get a couple of things that I left and then I'll
leave. Okay?"

Matt pressed the buzzer and waited the few minutes it

took Christian to get to the door and knock. Matt pulled
the door open and moved out of the way to let Christian
in.

Christian looked hesitant. "Hey."
"Hi." Matt watched as Christian walked halfway into

the living room before turning to face Matt. Matt
crossed his arms defensively. "What do you need,
Christian?"

"I need you to tell me what's wrong, why you've been

Where You Least Expect It - 153

ignoring my phone calls."

Matt shrugged. "I'm busy."
Christian threw up his hands. "Matt, come on. Tell

me what the fuck is going on. Three days ago, things
were fine and now you're shutting me out, blowing off
my phone calls, and avoiding running into me in the
parking lot. Either something's wrong or I imagined the
last month. You can't treat me like shit and expect me to
ignore it."

"There is nothing wrong," Matt repeated. "Do you

need to get something or not?"

"Fuck. Is this how it's going to be? Something's

wrong and you just ignore me until, what, until you feel
better? Or is this your fucked-up way of getting rid of
me?"

"Jesus, Christian, you don't have to be all fucking

melodramatic."

"Melodramatic? Nice. Fine, I give up. Can I get my

stuff out of the bedroom?"

"Go ahead."
Christian stormed past Matt into the bedroom. Matt

let out a frustrated sigh and ran his hands through his
hair. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He knew he was about to blow it
with Christian if he didn't do something now to fix it. He
had wanted Christian to just go along with Matt's
distance and wait patiently for Matt to decide he was
ready to talk, but that clearly wasn't going to happen.

It was a stupid, childish idea anyway. Matt made

himself walk into the bedroom and try to give Christian
some kind of explanation, even if Christian was still
pissed.

"I have nightmares," he said without preamble.
Christian jumped and turned around at the sound of

Matt's voice. Matt held eye contact as he walked the rest
of the way into the room and sat on the bed. "They don't

Where You Least Expect It - 154

happen a lot, but... I don't sleep for a couple of nights."
Matt shrugged, not sure how to explain and not wanting
to go into detail.

"About the Army?" Christian asked.
"Mostly. Sometimes there's other stuff mixed in,

random stuff that doesn't make any real sense. They're
not horrible, but they remind me about..." Matt made a
vague gesture with his hand, unsure how to explain.
"Just remind me of things."

"Matt." Christian crawled into the middle of the bed

and sat by Matt's side, rubbing a hand across his back.
"Why didn't you want to tell me?"

Matt shook his head. "It's not something I talk about.

Sam's the only one who knows and I've never given him
a lot of details."

Christian kept rubbing Matt's back. "What can I do?

Can I help?"

"I don't know." Matt finally looked up to meet

Christian's eyes. "Will you stay?"

"Of course I will." Christian reached up to cup Matt's

jaw.

"I'm sorry." Matt rested his forehead on Christian's.
"I know, honey. But you can't shut me out like that."

Christian shifted and brought Matt along with him so
that they were lying in the center of the bed facing each
other, legs entwined.

Matt reached out and wrapped his hand around

Christian's waist, rubbing his thumb in circles.

"Do you want to talk about them?" Christian asked

after a short silence.

"Not really. It's not like they're all that bad, just --"

Matt paused, looking for the right words. "I don't wake
up screaming and shit like that, it's just images, really,
and impressions. Sometimes it feels like I'm trapped,
sometimes there's gun fire. I've seen guys have a lot

Where You Least Expect It - 155

worse."

Christian kissed him. "It's okay. You don't have to

talk about them if you don't want to, but I don't mind if
you do. You can wake me up, or you can call me if I'm
not here."

Asking for help or comfort wasn't something Matt

was accustomed to doing, but he said anyway, "Yeah? I
might just do that."

Matt leaned forward and kissed Christian, pulling

him close.

"I am sorry," he said once they parted for air. "I told

you I wasn't good at this whole relationship thing."

Christian smiled again and stroked Matt's cheek. "It's

okay. I think we just need to remember to talk about
stuff. I'm kind of used to talking about everything with
Trent, so I kind of run my mouth off sometimes. I was
just feeling really shut out and -- I -- I didn't know what
had happened, if you were having second thoughts or --"

Matt kissed him suddenly, hard, cutting off the flow

of Christian's words. "No. Absolutely not, I promise.
And I wouldn't do that to you. I told you, I want this to
work. I guess I just need you to be patient."

"I can be patient. I just need you to not completely

shut me out."

Matt nodded. "Okay. I warned you this wouldn't be

easy."

"That's okay, too." Christian leaned close enough so

that their noses were just touching. "I haven't really done
this before, either. We'll just have to figure it out as we
go." He kissed Matt, pressing closer and wrapping his
arm around Matt's neck. The kiss started slow but built
quickly, stress and relief and emotion taking over.

Matt took control, thrusting his tongue into

Christian's mouth and gripping Christian's ass in his
hands, pulling them together before rolling so the

Where You Least Expect It - 156

smaller man was underneath him. Christian thrust up,
cock as hard as Matt's. Matt could feel fingers teasing
along his crease through his jeans.

"Christian. Fuck. Missed this." Matt pushed up onto

one elbow and ran a hand down Christian's chest and
stomach, along his hip and thigh, and back up over his
cock. The sound that escaped Christian's throat sounded
almost like a whimper. Matt started fumbling with the
zipper on Christian's jeans and kissed Christian's throat,
tongue playing over Christian's Adam's apple.

Christian arched back and moaned when Matt finally

pushed Christian's boxers out of the way. He watched as
his hand moved over Christian's cock, feeling the skin
move over Christian's hard shaft. He thrust his own hips
against Christian's body, arching as the friction brought
him close.

Christian shifted and suddenly he was opening Matt's

zipper and circling Matt's cock with his hand.

Matt's mouth crashed down on Christian's, tongue

plundering his mouth as they pulled and thrust
frantically. With their clothes out of the way, Matt could
feel heat and precome from both their cocks mixing.

Christian wrapped a leg around Matt's thigh, grinding

them together, hands bumping as they moved.

Matt moaned and pulled away long enough to push

their jeans down so Matt could straddle him, body
pushing Christian into the mattress. Matt felt the clash of
teeth as they kissed.

Christian broke the kiss. "Fuck. Matt. Close."
"Oh, fuck yes. Do it." Matt's voice was husky, harsh

with his breathing and his own need to come.

Christian grabbed Matt's ass, hard enough to leave

marks. Matt's balls were so tight they almost hurt and he
could feel his orgasm starting to take over. He threw his
head back and shouted as he shot, cock throbbing over

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and over, come landing warm and wet on his stomach
and chest. He heard Christian's answering shout and felt
more come hit his chest a split second later.

They lay there, Matt's head buried in Christian's neck

and Christian's arms wrapped tightly around Matt until
the need to move finally drew them apart. Matt flopped
on his back next to Christian and they both moaned at
the lack of contact and cold air.

Matt looked over at Christian and grinned. "We're a

mess."

Christian laughed. "We're good at that." Christian

stretched and made a sound close to a purr. "Nap?"

"You're over-dressed."
Christian made short work of his already askew

clothing and curled up on his side.

"Motivated, I see." Matt settled next to him and

pulled the blankets up, even though he knew Christian
would just kick them off in his sleep.

"Hmm. Motivated and sleepy." Christian snuggled up

against Matt and rested his head on Matt's shoulder, arm
wrapped around Matt's waist.

Matt hoped his conversation with Christian, not to

mention the orgasm, was enough that he could sleep
without being woken by phantom screams. He had
hoped they'd fade away, at least for a while, once he'd
admitted he wanted a relationship with Christian, but he
realized now that there was still more work to be done.

Where You Least Expect It - 158

Chapter Fourteen

Seeing Christian waiting for him by the bike rack

after work the next day brought a smile to Matt's face.
He quickened his pace.

"Hey, you," Matt greeted him with a small pang of

regret that he couldn't give Christian a more tangible
display.

"Hey." Christian smiled and pushed away from where

he was leaning. "How was your day?"

Matt shrugged. "Decent but getting better. Yours?"
"Buses, classes, fancy coffee drinks. The usual.

Busy."

Matt jerked his head in the direction of his truck.

"Come home with me and I'll feed you."

"Okay, but I need to go home at some point tonight.

I'm pretty much completely out of clean clothes."
Christian fell into step with him as they headed through
the parking lot.

"Deal." Matt could sympathize with the need to do

laundry.

"Do you want to do anything this weekend or do you

need to study?" Matt asked once they were on the road.

Christian was silent for a moment before saying, "I've

been thinking."

Matt frowned. "That doesn't sound good. What's

wrong? I thought we were doing okay."

"Oh, shit, I don't mean like that. I'm sorry."
"What then?" Matt stole a glance at him. "You're

chewing your lip, you know."

That got a small smile from Christian. "Sorry. I was

thinking that you need to talk to Sam."

Matt was silent as he thought about that. He knew

he'd need to talk to Sam eventually, he just hadn't

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figured out what to say. "Hey, I know we've known each
other for more than a decade, but I think I might be gay
and I'm sleeping with a guy." That certainly didn't seem
like the way to go.

Christian broke the silence nervously. "I figured that's

what's been bothering you lately, and I know you're
worried about it, but I think it'll be okay. I mean, he's
known you since you were kids, right?"

"Yeah." Matt looked over at him. "I'm just -- I don't

know. It's just weird and freaking me out a bit."

"I know, honey. But the longer you wait, the weirder

it's going to get. I mean, eventually he's going to try to
set you up again."

Matt grimaced. "Yeah. That'll be awkward." Matt

reached out for Christian's hand. "Thanks."

Christian kissed his knuckles. "No problem. So what

are you feeding me?"

"How do you feel about pork chops? I though we'd

try something besides chicken or spaghetti."

"Works for me."
Dinner was easier to cook than Matt had hoped. He

was starting to enjoy cooking, particularly since it meant
Christian ate more than ramen and baloney sandwiches.
Once everything was cooking, Matt joined Christian in
the living room.

Christian looked up from his book. "How's it

coming?"

"Good. We have about twenty minutes to kill."
Christian grinned. "Yeah? That gives me time to read

a couple of pages then."

Matt leaned in and kissed Christian's neck. "Or we

can fool around. Since I have to take you home tonight,
and all."

Christian hummed happily and closed his book. "I

can read later."

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Matt grabbed Christian around the waist and dove in

for a passionate kiss. It still amazed him how worked up
Christian got him. Just being in the same room was
enough to make him hard some days.

Christian responded eagerly, pressing close to Matt

and taking equal control of the kiss.
He moved to straddle Matt's lap and Matt took
advantage of the change in position to grab Christian's
ass. Christian found one of Matt's nipples and squeezed,
causing Matt to moan and thrust his hips up.

"So fucking sensitive," Christian murmured.
"Want you." Matt figured they had just enough time.
Christian tugged his shirt off and Matt leaned

forward to tease Christian's nipple while working
Christian's pants open. Christian arched and gripped
Matt's head in place against Christian's chest. Matt
opened Christian's zipper, seeking skin.

Matt didn't hear the key in the door, but he did hear

Sam's sudden exclamation of "Holy crap," followed
immediately by the sound of the door slamming.

"Shit." Matt turned his head, but Sam was gone.

Christian scrambled off his lap and Matt hurried to the
door, just having a second to take in the mortified look
on Christian's face. "I'll be right back," he said.

Sam was standing in front of the elevator when Matt

walked into the hall. Matt called out to stop him from
leaving. Sam turned around, hands on his hips and eyes
wide and shocked; he looked almost as freaked out as
Christian had been.

"Wait," Matt said. Matt felt like there was a rock in

his stomach.

"Dude," was all Sam managed. He shook his head,

opened his mouth, closed it again. "Dude."

Matt ran a hand through his hair as he stopped in

front of Sam. "Shit. I. You weren't supposed to find out

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like that."

"I bet." Sam restated the obvious, voice a little more

high pitched than normal.

"Look, I was going to tell you." Fuck, this was going

badly.

Sam put up his hands, palms out. "You don't owe me

an explanation."

"Bullshit," Matt responded. "I owe you something, at

least. Do you want to come back inside? I'd rather not do
this in the hall."

"You looked kind of busy, man."
Matt didn't know what to say to that. If Sam had

walked in on him with a woman, they certainly wouldn't
be having this conversation. And he certainly didn't
want to tell Sam that he'd killed the mood and Matt
would just spend the rest of the night stressing about
what Sam had seen. "Look, just come inside for a
minute."

Sam relented and followed Matt back to the

apartment. Christian was no longer in the living room,
but Matt knew he couldn't have gone far. He didn't want
Christian to worry, but he didn't want Sam to skip out on
him.

"Just. Wait here a minute, okay." Sam nodded and

Matt went to check the den for Christian; the door was
closed and Matt assumed Christian was hiding behind it.

"Hey," he said from the doorway. "You okay?"
Christian looked up from his textbook. "Yeah, I

guess. Completely freaked, actually. You?"

"I'll let you know after I talk to Sam."
Christian bit his lip. "Okay."
"What?"
"Nothing. I'm sorry."
"So not your fault," Matt managed a grin. "I'll be

right back."

Where You Least Expect It - 162

Sam was in the kitchen drinking a beer. Matt picked

up the one Sam put out for him and leaned against the
counter.

"I. Fuck." He took a swig of beer and shook his head.

"Look, I don't know what I'm supposed to do here."

"You don't know what you're supposed to do? I just

walked in on you with your hands down a guy's pants. Is
this a new thing or have you been keeping this from me
for the last ten years?"

Okay, Sam was angry. That at least gave Matt a place

to start from, however unprepared he was. "It's a new
thing, and I'm not sure how I'm supposed to explain it or
what you want to know. But it's only been going on for a
couple of months and I wasn't ready to tell you. Hell, at
first I didn't think there was anything worth telling."

"So, what? You're bi? Gay? You better not just be

using him to get off, 'cause he's a good guy and doesn't
deserve that."

"Fuck, Sam, no I'm not using him. I've barely had

enough time to wrap my head around it. You know my
relationships with women have always sucked." Matt
shook his head, still confused. "I'm not running out to
define it just yet."

Sam narrowed his eyes and looked at Matt closely.

"Are you telling me you're actually dating Christian?"

Matt frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"You used the 'R' word, man." Matt thought he saw

the hint of a grin and rolled his eyes.

"Yes, fine. We're dating." Matt's annoyance softened

as he said it. Weird. "I need to know if you're going to
be freaked out about this."

"That you're gay? No. But I'm pissed that you think I

would be and that you didn't trust me enough to talk to
me about it. Hell, if I'd known, I wouldn't have wasted
time trying to find chicks for you, I would've found

Where You Least Expect It - 163

dudes to hook you up with."

Matt didn't even want to think about Sam fixing Matt

up with guys. "It's not that I didn't trust you or thought
you'd judge me." He tried to explain what he'd been
thinking. "I was, I don't know, judging myself, I guess.
And freaked out that I could be so far out of touch that it
took me until now to figure out why I didn't want
relationships with women."

The timer on the stove beeped and Matt turned to

take the chops out of the oven.

"You're cooking?" Sam sounded incredulous.
Matt placed the pan on the stove and turned off the

potatoes. "I've cooked before."

"No, you made frozen pizza. That's..." Sam went

closer to the stove. "That's pork chops! Jesus, did you
make a vegetable, too?"

Matt crossed his arms. "No, I did not make a

vegetable. I made meat and potatoes. If you stop being
an ass, I'll even offer you some."

"For free food? I'll totally behave myself."
"Good. Set the table." Matt clapped Sam on the

shoulder as he walked out of the kitchen.

Christian was on his cell phone when Matt opened

the door. "Got to go." Christian clicked the phone off.
"Hey. Everything okay?"

Matt walked the rest of the way in and shut the door

partway. "Think so. I offered Sam dinner."

"Okay." Christian bit his lip again but didn't move.
"You're invited, too."
Christian stood up and moved quickly to hug Matt, as

if he was afraid Matt might get away. "I'm sorry."

"What? Why?" Matt hugged him back. He'd never

been so confused, so often since puberty had hit.

Christian took a deep breath but didn't look up.

"Because I started all this and I don't want to ruin

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anything for you."

Matt tilted Christian's head up and kissed him. "Shut

up. You didn't ruin anything." Matt kissed him again
before pulling away. "Let's go eat."

Matt took Christian's hand and led him into the living

room, simultaneously emphasizing their relationship for
Sam's benefit and not allowing Christian the opportunity
to hide in the den from a misplaced sense of guilt.

Sam was standing awkwardly in the kitchen, table

already set.

"Hey, Sam." Christian sounded embarrassed.
Sam looked a little like a deer in headlights. "Hey,

Christian."

Matt's own feeling of awkwardness was pushed aside

by a vague sense of amusement at Christian and Sam;
the usual exuberance each man typically displayed was
gone as they both muttered their greetings and seemed to
want to look anywhere but each other.

Matt took action before things could degenerate. He

let go of Christian's hand and moved to the stove, taking
one last look at everything before putting Christian and
Sam to work moving the food to the table. He knew it
would take a bit for Sam to adjust to his new perspective
on Matt and Matt's relationship with Christian, but
standing around dithering and avoiding eye contact was
not the way to make that happen.

"So, Sam," Matt said once they were all settled at the

table. "You have plans later?"

"Not really. Uh. I was going to head over to Riley's.

A couple of guys from work are playing pool." He
shrugged, still obviously feeling awkward. "I stopped by
to see if you wanted to come along. Well, you and
Christian," he was quick to correct.

"I'm not staying. I mean, I have to do laundry. And

study," Christian answered before looking back at his

Where You Least Expect It - 165

plate, blushing.

"I'm driving Christian home after dinner, but I'm up

for pool."

Sam turned to Christian. "You sure you can't hang

out? You're a way better pool player than this guy." Sam
pointed at Matt with his knife.

"I play for fun," Matt said, only slightly defensively.

If Sam was impugning his pool playing abilities, things
were on the right track.

Christian laughed. "I could come down for a game.

But I can't hang out late. I'm really, really running out of
clothes."

Sam made a dismissive sound. "Just throw stuff in

the dryer with a sheet of fabric softener. Good as new."

Christian looked like he was considering it. "Does

that actually work?"

Matt started to relax. It might take some work to find

common ground, and for Sam to get used to Matt being
in a relationship with a man, but Matt was confident
they could figure out what their new normal was.

***

"You're awfully quiet." Matt nudged Christian. It was

a few days after their unexpected outing to Sam and
Matt suspected Christian was still freaked out.

"Oh. Am I?" Christian sounded distracted.
Matt smiled, moving closer. "What's on your mind?"
"I was, well, I was thinking about the nightmares you

have. I know that Post Traumatic Stress Disorder --"

Matt made a frustrated sound and moved away.

"Have you been reading about PTSD on the Internet?"

"Not just the Internet!" Christian said indignantly. "I

did some library research, too."

"Christian. Don't."

Where You Least Expect It - 166

"Don't what? Give a shit about you having

nightmares?"

"Make assumptions that because I saw combat that I

have PTSD. You don't know what you're talking about."

"I know nightmares are a main symptom."
Matt realized he should have talked about this sooner.

"One symptom, Christian. You do realize that there are
others, right?"

"Of course I do. Nightmares, flashbacks, anxiety,

depression." Christian ticked each word off on his
fingers.

Matt moved across the couch and crossed his arms

defensively. "Don't you think you're over-simplifying?"

"What if it is PTSD? It can get really bad and --"
Matt cut him off. "They're just dreams."
"Right, just dreams that you have and don't sleep for

days after because why? Because you're afraid if you go
back to sleep, they'll start again?"

"God damn it." Matt jumped up and started pacing.

"Look, they're nightmares. I told you about them
because... because you were here when one happened
and you'll probably be here when another one happens. I
don't sleep, but they don't interfere with the rest of my
life. I still go to work and get my job done. Hell, there
have been times that I've worked on less sleep because
of some server issue that we're having, never mind the
dreams."

"I don't want to fight with you," Christian sounded

resigned.

"I'm not fighting."
Christian cocked an eyebrow. "No? You look pretty

pissed off."

Matt sighed. "I just don't like talking about it."
"Talking about it might help. You might figure out

what's triggering them. Have you thought about seeing

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someone?"

Matt gave Christian a cocky grin, hoping to diffuse

the conversation. "I thought I was seeing you?"

The joke didn't have the desired effect and merely

caused Christian to throw up his hands in frustration.
"Fine. Forget it. God, you're so fucking stubborn, you
think you have to shut everything inside and act all
macho. Do you think people are going to think less of
you or something? Fuck, I need to study." Christian got
up and started walking toward the hall to grab his pack.

Matt caught his arm as he walked passed. "Wait.

Just... sit back down, okay?"

Christian hesitated but agreed. "Okay." He settled

back on the couch with his legs curled up underneath
him. "I get that it bothers you to talk about it, but you're
going to have to get used to me making sure that you're
taking care of yourself."

Matt sat next to Christian, putting his arm around

Christian's shoulders. "There's a lot of misinformation
out there -- about the military, about combat, and about
PTSD. A lot of people have agendas. I've been screened,
Christian. Stress is a trigger, I know that. Stress about
work, stress about," Matt made a general motion with
his hand, "Us, coming out to Sam. It doesn't mean I'm
crazy and it doesn't mean I need a shrink."

Christian started to speak, but Matt cut him off.
"Do you know what PTSD is really like? What some

of the guys I was in with have been through?"

Christian pulled back far enough so that he could see

Matt's face. "You mean you don't want to get help
because you're not the worst off? Matt, you're just as
deserving of help as they are."

Matt shook his head. "No, that's not what I mean. I

mean I saw a lot of shit and I made a point to educate
myself about it. And, yes, I'm aware that the onset can

Where You Least Expect It - 168

be delayed, but if I worry about that every time I have a
bad dream, I will go crazy."

Christian still didn't look convinced. "Look, I know

you're concerned and I know PTSD is what everyone
thinks about when they hear the words soldier and
nightmare in the same sentence, but it's not always the
case. You have to trust me on this, Chris. Real life is
more complicated than the movies."

"I know that. And you have to talk to me and, I guess,

educate me."

"I can think of a few ways to educate you." Matt

pounced, kissing Christian until he was good and
distracted.

Matt knew they'd talk about it again, but Matt would

be prepared next time. He'd also find a way to get the
right information to Christian before Christian was able
to panic.

***

As the quarter wore on, Christian was working more

and taking more late shifts. Matt insisted on picking him
up most nights, even if it was after ten by the time
Christian was ready to leave. Christian argued that he
liked biking because it got him exercise and saved on
pollution. Matt's counter-argument that some days the
ride home was the only time they got to see each other
won Christian over.

"Do you want to do something Friday night?" Matt

asked as they started the short drive home.

Christian leaned back against the headrest,

uncharacteristically still. "I can't, I have to work."

"Damn. On a Friday? I feel like I haven't seen you in

forever."

"I need the extra money," Christian said with a yawn.

Where You Least Expect It - 169

Matt frowned. "Money might be tight, but there has

to be a better alternative than working yourself into
exhaustion. I can lend you some if you need it."

"I don't need charity, Matt."
"How is lending my boyfriend money so he isn't

working his ass off charity?" They'd had this
conversation before when Matt insisted on paying for
dinner and were obviously still hitting the same wall.

"It just is. Look, you knew I was in school and

working when we first met, so don't give me shit for not
being able to hang out all the time."

"I'm not giving you shit, I'm just disappointed. And I

don't understand why you won't let me lend you
money."

"I'm not taking your money." Christian said it with

such finality that Matt let it drop for the time being and
switched to a subject he thought was safe.

"Do you need to go home or are you coming back to

my place?" They had more or less established a routine
with Christian usually spending the entire weekend and
a few nights during the week. Matt liked the company
and he was more than willing to read while Christian
studied; he enjoyed the normalcy and never felt
pressured to entertain Christian.

"Just take me to my place."
Matt tightened his grip on the steering wheel, willing

himself not to fight with Christian while he was driving.

Christian was halfway out of the truck before Matt

turned the engine off. "Hey, hold on."

Christian sat back in the passenger seat and turned to

face Matt. "I'm sorry. I'm just so fucking stressed."

"I know. I'm not mad." Matt tried to keep his voice

gentle. "I'll meet you after work tomorrow, okay?"

Christian closed the distance between them and

kissed Matt goodnight. "Okay. 'Night."

Where You Least Expect It - 170

"'Night."
Christian slipped out of the truck after one more kiss.

Matt watched him walk up the stairs and head inside
before driving away.

Where You Least Expect It - 171

Chapter Fifteen

Matt was surprised to find Christian already waiting

for him after work the next day; he thought he'd
managed to leave a little early.

"Hey. No bike?"
Christian shook his head. "The bus was faster." He

smiled. "Want to give me a ride anyway?"

Matt smiled back. "I think I can manage that." His

fingers brushed Christian's as they walked toward the
truck. It wasn't the kiss Matt wanted, but it would do for
the moment.

By the time Matt pulled into his parking garage,

Christian was asleep. Matt leaned over and brushed a
kiss across Christian's forehead.

Christian's eyes fluttered open and he gave Matt an

embarrassed smile. "Sorry. Are we there?"

"It's okay," Matt replied softly. "You were asleep

before I could ask where you wanted to go, so I just
came to my place. I can take you to your place instead if
you want."

Christian undid his seatbelt and stretched. "If you'll

feed me, I can stay for a little while."

"Deal." Matt would have taken Christian home if

asked, but he definitely preferred this option.

Once upstairs, Christian dropped his bag and flopped

down on the couch. "If we order takeout, we can make
out before they get here."

"You're a genius. What do you want?" Matt rolled his

eyes at Christian's leer. "For dinner."

Christian leaned his head back and stared at the

ceiling as if seeking the answer. "Good question. Pizza?
Thai? Chinese?"

"Thai," Matt decided. "The usual?"

Where You Least Expect It - 172

"Sure." Christian's eyes had drifted shut again.
Matt let Christian nap while he called in the order

and changed into jeans and a T-shirt.

Matt sat down next to Christian, hand on the inside of

Christian's thigh and mouth on his neck, drawing a moan
from Christian, who spread his thighs further to allow
Matt more access.

"Hi."
"Hi. Want me to let you nap until the food gets here?"
Christian snuggled into Matt, nuzzling along his jaw.

"Not really. I think you should take advantage of the fact
that I'm not working or studying."

"I like taking advantage of you."
Christian's laugh turned into a groan as Matt moved

his hand higher to cup the growing bulge in Christian's
jeans.

"Nice. Been a while." Christian arched his back and

pushed into Matt's hand.

Matt grinned and pushed his tongue into Christian's

mouth for a taste. Christian kissed him back, hard,
sucking on Matt's tongue and moaning. Matt responded
just as aggressively, cock going from interested to hard
as nails. He could feel Christian throbbing under his
hand. He undid the buttons on Christian's jeans, fingers
lightly touching Christian through the thin barrier of
Christian's boxers. He broke the kiss and pulled
Christian's shirt off.

"God, look at you. So fucking hot." Matt traced the

wet spot on Christian's boxers, making Christian moan
and his cock jump.

"Don't tease." Christian shifted restlessly under Matt's

hand, trying to increase the friction. Matt touched him
gently before relenting and pulling Christian's boxers
off. It had only been a few days, but Matt was already
aching and Christian was almost desperate.

Where You Least Expect It - 173

Matt wrapped his hand around Christian's dick and

bent to suck on one of Christian's nipples. Christian's
hips started rocking in time with Matt's strokes, breath
coming in pants and a litany of "yes, yes, please, fuck
yes, close" spilling from Christian's lips. Matt felt
Christian's cock harden even more and changed
positions to watch Christian come, mouth open and neck
muscles taut.

Christian finally opened his eyes. "God, that was

amazing. Tell me what you want, honey."

"I want your mouth on me." Matt still couldn't get

enough of that.

Christian kissed Matt sloppily before slipping to the

floor between Matt's knees. Matt groaned as he watched
Christian open his jeans. "Mmm, boxer briefs. Sexy."
Christian grinned up at him before continuing to work
on Matt's pants, taking Matt's jeans and underwear off at
the same time.

Matt watched as Christian started kissing the

sensitive spot on the inside of Matt's thigh before slowly
dragging his tongue up the center of Matt's hardness.
Matt tried to watch as Christian ran his tongue around
the head, but was quickly overcome by need, head
dropping back and eyes closing.

"Fuck, yes." Matt tangled his fingers in Christian's

hair, careful not to pull too hard.

Christian alternated between sucking lightly on the

head and licking up and down the shaft. Matt slid further
down on the couch, spreading his legs to make sure
Christian had room to play. Christian moaned happily
and started nuzzling Matt's balls, slowly sucking on each
one, hands wandering freely up and down Matt's thighs.

"Christian. God, that feels so good. I've been thinking

about this all week."

Christian released his nut with a pop and looked up at

Where You Least Expect It - 174

Matt, eyes hot. "Yeah?" Hot breath ghosted through
Matt's pubes.

Matt managed a weak grin. "Are you going to tease

me now after I took pity on you?"

"Oh, I see, it was a pity hand job." The twinkle in

Christian's eyes belied his words.

"God, Chris."
Christian chuckled and swallowed Matt down

without warning, drawing a long moan from Matt, who
dropped his head back on the couch again with a
muffled thud, hips rising to meet Christian's mouth.
Christian stopped teasing, using one hand to cup the
base of Matt's cock while the other traced random
patterns on the inside of his thigh and the sensitive skin
behind Matt's balls.

"Good, babe." Christian responded by pushing a little

harder, drawing another moan from Matt. Matt felt
Christian's fingers move further back, slowly brushing
over the puckered skin at Matt's entrance. Christian
pushed gently before the finger disappeared, returning a
moment later slick enough that he slipped easily inside,
fingering Matt slowly as he continued to suck.

Matt was breathing hard, moving between Christian's

mouth and the finger moving in and out of his ass. Matt
could feel his balls pull up, his orgasm building.
Christian swallowed around the head of Matt's dick
while rubbing his fingertip across Matt's prostate. Matt
arched his back and held Christian's head in place as he
shot.

Christian's finger slipped out of Matt's ass while

Christian continued to lick Matt's softening cock. Matt
relaxed his grip, gently rubbing Christian's scalp as his
breathing returned to normal.

Christian released Matt and leaned back against his

thighs. When Matt looked down, Christian was smiling

Where You Least Expect It - 175

at him. "Better?" he asked.

Matt returned the smile. "Better."
The buzzer rang, letting them know that their dinner

had arrived and making them both laugh. At least the
delivery guy had better timing than Sam. Christian
crawled out of Matt's way so Matt could get dressed.
While Matt paid, Christian put his clothes back on and
busied himself in the kitchen getting plates, forks, and
beer.

Christian powered though his Pad Thai and half of

the rice before finally putting the empty carton down
and leaning back against the couch.

"Thanks for dinner, Matt."
Matt smiled around a mouthful of curry and winked.

"It's in my best interest to keep you fed."

Christian smiled and stretched. "This isn't the only

time I eat, you know."

Matt placed his empty carton on the coffee table and

leaned back next to Christian. "I don't think ramen
actually has any nutritional value, you know."

Christian shrugged and looked away. "It's cheap."
"If you need money --"
Christian cut him off, turning to face him. "I don't

need your money, Matt. I told you, I'm fine."

"You don't need to get pissed, Christian, I'm just

offering to help."

"Whatever. I should go." Christian stood up and

walked passed Matt, heading toward the door.

"Hey! Don't just storm off."
"Fine." He turned around. "What?"
"Jesus Christ, Christian, what the hell is going on?"
"Nothing's going on. I'm busy. I have to work. I have

to study. Why is this suddenly an issue?"

"You're stressed the fuck out every time I see you

lately. You're irritated, working your ass off constantly,

Where You Least Expect It - 176

and you won't let me help."

"I told you, I don't need your help. I'm fine. And you

fucking knew when we hooked up that I'm working
through school."

"Oh, for fuck's sake, Christian, that's not my point

and you know it." Matt stepped closer to Christian.
"You're way more stressed than you were last quarter
and you're working a hell of a lot more. All I'm asking is
that you tell me what's going on."

"I told you --"
"Come on, Christian. You didn't let me get away with

not telling you about my nightmares. Stop being
hypocritical and be honest."

Matt waited, watching as conflicting emotions played

over Christian's face. Matt wasn't sure if Christian was
going to open up or would continue evading the issue.
Matt saw Christian's face fall as he made the decision.

"Fine." Christian sighed. "I'm not sure how I'm going

to come up with the money to pay for next quarter. And
I need new brakes for my bike, and my damn laptop is
acting funny."

"Can't you take a quarter off to save up?"
"No! No, damn it, I can't take another fucking quarter

off! And I can't ask my parents for money and I can't get
enough financial fucking aid. I've thought of all that
already." Christian was shouting now.

"Why the fuck won't you let me help?"
"I don't need a fucking hand-out!"
"God damn it, it's not a fucking hand out, Christian, I

love you and I want to help. Why the hell won't you let
me?"

Christian blinked, looking shocked. "What?"
Matt frowned, confused. "What?"
"You love me?"
"I --" Matt took a breath. "Yeah. I do."

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Christian stared at him for so long that Matt started to

get nervous. He hadn't really intended to just blurt his
feelings out like that.

Finally, a smile broke out on Christian's face. "Oh. I

love you, too." Christian bit his lip and laughed.

Matt let out the breath he didn't realize he was

holding and returned Christian's smile before closing the
rest of the distance between them. Matt pulled Christian
close, kissing the top of Christian's head. Christian's
arms slipped around Matt's waist.

Stepping back, Matt tugged Christian toward the

couch. "C'mere." They sat, Christian curling next to him.
Matt tilted Christian's head up and kissed Christian
before turning serious.

"I want to help, Christian. And I want to be able to

spend time with you. We can figure something out."

Christian frowned again. "I don't want to take your

money, Matt. That's not why I'm with you."

"If I thought that was why you were with me, I

wouldn't be offering. Besides, if you were looking for
someone to use for money, I doubt I would be your first
choice."

"Unless I was trying to be subtle."
"Christian. Stop. Are you trying to change my mind?"
"No! No, I just... Shit." Christian leaned back,

increasing the space between them. "God, no. I wasn't
lying, Matt. I love you. I --" He closed his eyes. "What if
you change your mind and decide it's too difficult?"

"Why? Because I spent years trying to be straight

before I met you? I came out to Sam and Alison, and
you know I'm trying to deal with coming out in public."
Matt still wasn't sure if Alison knew about his
relationship with Christian before he told her, but she
certainly hadn't been surprised or upset.

"I know. But what if you decide you can't? What if

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you decide I'm too fucking immature or young or
whatever for you to be with?"

Matt leaned over Christian. "No. Stop it. Look at me.

I'm not going to change my mind. I keep telling you, I
want this. I want you. I wouldn't be arguing with you
over this if I didn't."

Matt could see Christian visibly relax. "Okay." He

curled back into Matt. "I want to let you help."

Matt kissed his forehead. "Okay. We'll figure

something out. Do you need me to let you study?"

Christian sighed. "Yeah. I should." He kissed Matt.

"Thank you."

Matt kissed him back, pulling away before it could

get too serious. "Study. I'm going to clean up and take a
shower."

Christian smiled, looking obviously relieved. "'Kay."

Matt kissed him one last time before getting up and
leaving Christian to study.

Matt was reading when Christian came into the

bedroom a couple of hours later, hands shoved in his
pockets.

"If I stay, will you drop me off at home in the

morning?"

"Or you can drive me to work and take the truck."
Christian's eyes went wide for a second. "Yeah?"
"Sure, why not? I can pick the keys up from you in

the afternoon."

Christian smiled. "Cool."
"Come to bed?"
"I should study some more." Christian hesitated. "I

could read in here, though."

"I wouldn't mind the company."
Ten minutes later, Christian was sitting next to Matt

wearing just his boxers and reading one of his textbooks.
Matt smiled to himself and got more comfortable.

Where You Least Expect It - 179

Chapter Sixteen

Matt knew the solution to helping Christian pay for

school was obvious, but he had to overcome his own
reluctance and misgivings before he could approach
Christian. He'd made life-or-death decisions in the
military without hesitation but now found himself
struggling to take the next step with Christian.

The reluctance Christian had shown further

complicated things. Matt fully understood the pride and
fear they both had to deal with, the what-ifs. Unlike his
previous relationships, Matt knew he was thinking about
things with Christian in the long term; he had to
overcome his own issues with commitment and with
opening himself up to rejection. They may have said "I
love you," but that didn't mean they were both looking
for the same thing.

Matt knew the best chance to talk to Christian was on

his day off on Sunday, after a decent night's sleep and a
late breakfast. Matt even managed to get Christian to
take some time walking around window shopping before
finally heading back to the condo.

Matt followed Christian to the couch, lying with his

head in Christian's lap.

Christian smiled down at him, running the fingers of

one hand through Matt's hair while the other stroked
over Matt's ribs. "Thanks for breakfast," Christian said
softly.

Matt smiled, raising one hand and rubbing along the

nape of Christian's neck. "You're welcome." He allowed
himself to enjoy the moment a little longer before
saying, "I've been thinking."

Christian's fingers stilled. "Okay."
"You should move in with me."

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"What?"
"Move in with me."
"Matt, we both know I can't afford half of the rent on

this place."

Matt sat up so he could face him. "I didn't say pay

rent. I said move in with me. Look, if you can save on
the money you're paying on rent, it'll help with your
tuition, right?"

Christian looked flustered. "I can't just move out on

Trent."

"And I didn't say it had to happen this second or that

you should screw Trent over. But he can find a new
roommate."

"I." Christian frowned. "He's been my best friend

forever. I can't just leave him with all of the rent."

"I know. Will you think about it?"
Christian bit his lip. "You really want me to move in

with you? For real?"

"For real."
Christian leaned into him. "Okay. I'll talk to him. It

would save me a lot of money."

Matt tried to hold back his smile, but failed. He

pulled Christian closer. "Good," he said, trying to sound
matter-of-fact, but he couldn't hold back his grin. Rather
than being freaked out at offering to support Christian,
Matt felt at peace for the first time in ages.

Maybe he was figuring this whole relationship thing

out, after all.

***

In an effort to have more time together, Matt agreed

to spend the evening at Christian's apartment while
Christian did laundry, but not before trying to convince
Christian otherwise.

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"You could just bring your laundry to the condo.

Since you're going to have to move all your clothes
anyway."

"Please. I am not lugging a sack of dirty clothes

around with me. The laundry at my apartment is just
fine, and you can hang out at my place for once."

"Fine." Matt tried to suppress his grin. "We haven't

had sex in your bed yet, anyway."

Christian stuck his tongue out but didn't argue the

point.

Matt sprawled on Christian's futon -- which he was

forced to agree wasn't nearly as comfortable as his bed --
while Christian sat at the desk. He stole a glance at
Christian when the sound of the front door announced
that Trent was home; Matt knew Christian hadn't
discussed their plans with Trent. Christian remained
steadfastly focused on the laptop screen.

"Honey, I'm home!" Trent stuck his head in the

bedroom doorway. "You are not going to believe -- oh,
hi, Matt." Trent was obviously surprised by Matt's
presence.

Matt decided to let it slide; he knew he and Christian

had a habit of hiding themselves at Matt's condo. "Hey,
Trent. What wouldn't we believe?"

Trent immediately launched into his story, relating

his latest adventures in the club scene. Matt didn't know
any of the people he was referring to, but could certainly
appreciate Trent's animated recitation.

"So, what's new with you two?" Trent asked.
Matt glanced at Christian and started to respond

when Christian jumped up, telling Trent, "We so have to
talk," as he grabbed his friend's hand and pulled him
from the room. Matt chose to accept that as a good thing
and went back to reading his book when he heard the
door to Trent's bedroom close.

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The walls of the apartment were thin, but not thin

enough for Matt to hear their conversation. It only took a
moment for Trent to reappear.

"Oh my God, you asked him to move in with you!"

Trent practically threw himself on the futon next to
Matt. "That is so awesome!" Christian looked almost
sheepish as Trent continued to gush at Matt before
turning back to Christian to exclaim, "Honey, we have
to get you packed."

"Trent, chill out. I'm not going this second."
"What? Why? Honey, if some hot stud like Matt

asked me to move in with him, I'd be all over that."

"I'm not jacking you on my half of the rent. Besides,

he just asked me the other day."

Trent made a dismissive gesture. "Don't worry about

the rent."

Matt watched as they continued to argue. Christian

finally prevailed, convincing Trent that he wasn't
prepared to just up and move everything at a moment's
notice.

"We can talk about it Friday at dinner, when I'm not

trying to study." Christian looked pointedly at Trent.

"Oh, all right." Trent rolled gracefully off the bed.

"But don't feel like you have to stick around on my
account."

Christian let out a sigh as Trent left the room. "Sorry.

I didn't think he was going to be quite so..."

"Enthusiastic?"
"Right. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was trying

to get rid of me."

"He's just being supportive in his own Trent-like

way."

Christian laughed. "That's one way of looking at it."

Christian glanced at the time. "Come on, you can help
me fold my laundry."

Where You Least Expect It - 183

***

They had plans to have dinner with Sam and Trent on

Friday at Riley's, since they all knew each other from
different places. Matt was making an effort to blend
their lives together more and stop hiding. As far as Matt
knew, Trent had dropped the subject of when Christian
was going to move out; Matt let it alone as well,
knowing it would just stress Christian out.

While they waited for Sam to arrive, the three of

them settled into their table to work out the details of
Christian's move. Christian was still adamant that he
wouldn't move out until he knew his part of the rent
would be covered; Matt intervened by offering to help
Christian financially so he could focus on studying and
not work so many hours.

"Besides," Matt told him, "The less you work, the

more I get to see you."

"So you're paying me for sex?" Christian teased.
"Isn't that what all long-term relationships are based

on?" Trent added his two cents, making Christian roll
his eyes. "Well, isn't it?"

"You're such a cynic," Christian told his friend.
"I thought I was a slut?" Trent pretended to look

confused.

Christian tilted his head in thought. "A cynical slut?"

he suggested.

Matt shook his head. "I thought we were trying to

come up with a plan?"

Christian tried to look repentant. "Sorry, honey. It

just freaks me out a little to take rent money from you. I
don't want you to think I'm just using you for money."

"Christian, I told you, if I didn't trust you, I wouldn't

offer. I want to help."

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Christian blushed and smiled. "Okay."
Sam dropped down in the empty chair. "God, you

two, we're in public."

Christian's blush deepened. "Sorry, Sam."
"Nauseating, aren't they?" Trent said.
"Completely," Sam agreed, reaching for the empty

glass and draining the pitcher of beer.

"Dude, you look like crap. What's up?" Matt asked.
Sam took a long drink. "My apartment building is

being condemned."

"What? Why?"
"Remember that flood two years ago? The one they

did the shitty-assed job cleaning up? Fucking black
mold. A couple of people got sick and ended up calling
the Health Department."

"I told you that place needed to be condemned," Matt

said. "When do you have to be out?"

"They're giving us a week. Where the fuck am I

supposed to go in a week?"

"You can move in with me," Trent piped up.
Sam frowned. "I thought Christian lived with you?"
"He's moving in with Matt. Apparently, true love

trumps best friend." Trent sighed dramatically and took
a sip of his drink.

Sam blinked, looking mildly stunned as he turned to

Matt. "He's moving in with you? You mean you're
committing to a relationship and you didn't bother to tell
me?"

Matt shrugged, trying to play off the awkwardness.

"Because I knew you would give me shit. I was hoping
you wouldn't notice."

"Jackass." Sam kicked him in the shin. "Go buy us

another pitcher so I can talk about you behind your
back."

"Oh, fuck, no." Matt loved Sam like a brother, but he

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wasn't leaving himself undefended.

"How am I supposed to threaten Christian with

bodily harm if he hurts you if you won't leave us alone?"
Sam made it sound like a reasonable question.

Christian choked on his beer. "What?"
"Ooh, does that mean I get to threaten Matt if he

hurts Christian?" Trent asked, suddenly intrigued.

Matt pinched the bridge of his nose. "For fuck's sake.

No one's threatening anyone. And Trent? Really?" Matt
clearly had about fifty pounds of muscle on the other
man.

"You spoil all my fun, dude." Sam turned to Trent.

"How much is the rent? When can I move in?"

Trent rattled off the rent and security deposit. "You

can move in as soon as we can get Christian's stuff
moved to Matt's, which depends on Christian's work
schedule."

"I don't have that much to pack. We haven't talked

about whether I should move my desk and futon, or my
bookcase, but the rest of the stuff can stay in the
apartment. I have Sunday off, so we can do it then if
you're ready."

"It's not like I have that much of a choice. I'm going

to put most of my stuff in storage, anyway. I just have to
get it packed."

Christian looked at Matt, bottom lip caught between

his teeth. "Assuming you're ready for me to move in that
soon."

Matt smiled. "I think that's a brilliant idea. Do you

need help packing?"

"I can help Christian," Trent said. "You should

probably help Sam."

"That would be awesome, man. I owe you."
Matt was pretty sure Trent was getting the easy job.

"You'll pay me back." Matt waved Sam's concern off.

Where You Least Expect It - 186

"Who wants food?"

***

Matt spent hours Saturday night helping Sam pack

most of his belongings into a rental truck destined for
storage. By the time he got back to the condo, it was
after midnight, but Christian was still awake, watching a
science show on TV.

"Hey, honey, how's Sam?" Christian looked over the

back of the couch as Matt hung up his coat.

"Stressed and tired. And pissed, in case you hadn't

gotten the memo." Matt leaned in to kiss Christian.

Christian hummed happily and moved closer. "I think

people Sam doesn't even know got the memo. How are
you?"

Matt smiled and wrapped an arm around his lover.

"Tired but not stressed or pissed off. Looking forward to
having you here every night from now on."

Christian made a happy sound and pulled Matt down

for another kiss. "Good. Me, too."

"Yeah?" Matt knew the answer, but having it

reinforced didn't hurt.

"Uh-huh. I've stopped stressing that you might think

I'm doing it for the wrong reasons. You don't think that
makes me too sappy, do you?"

"Not too sappy, no." Matt's hand slid up Christian's

shirt, rubbing along his back and rumbling happily.
"You're warm."

Christian giggled. "I turned the heat up."
Matt laughed and kissed him hard. "We should crash.

It's late and we still have a lot left to do tomorrow."

Christian smiled. "Okay."
"What?"
"Nothing." He smiled again and buried his head in

Where You Least Expect It - 187

Matt's neck. Matt hugged him before pulling Christian
to his feet.

"Bed, babe. Turn the TV off." He kissed Christian

again.

"I can't turn the TV off if you're kissing me."
After one more kiss, Matt moved away and headed

toward the bedroom, pulling his shirt over his head.
"Hurry up."

Christian giggled again before searching for the

remote, turning the TV off, and following Matt into the
bedroom.

When Christian got to the bedroom, Matt was

sprawled on the bed, one leg bent at the knee causing the
fabric of his jeans to stretch over his groin. Matt's hand
rested on the top of his thigh, thumb rubbing back and
forth.

Matt shifted slightly. "You okay?" His hand moved

upward ever so slightly.

Christian shook his head. "You look hot."
Matt stretched. "I do?" His hand moved to rub his

balls through the thin denim.

"Oh. Yeah." Christian just starred at him for a

minute. "Yeah, you look hot."

Matt grinned. "You think?" Christian watched as

Matt cupped his balls, spreading his legs to give himself
more room. Christian leaned back against the dresser.

"Matt." Christian pressed his hand against his own

growing erection, causing Matt to moan.

"Fuck." Matt gasped and undid the button on his

pants, slowly pulling his zipper down. Christian was still
watching, seemingly mesmerized.

"Oh, God, Matt, please."
"Please what?" Matt's jeans were open, his cock

pushing up through the opening and straining against his
boxers. His hand was inches from his erection, fingers

Where You Least Expect It - 188

moving restlessly.

Matt watched as Christian pushed his hand harder

against his own erection. "Touch yourself. Let me see."

Matt's moan surprised him. He shoved his pants and

boxers down below his hips, baring himself. Matt
wrapped one hand around his straining cock and fondled
his balls with the other.

Christian moaned again as he watched Matt. Matt

stared back at him, gaze shifting between Christian's
eyes and the hand rubbing against his erection. Christian
leaned back against the dresser and opened his own
pants, grabbing himself and stroking.

Matt started to move faster, rubbing his thumb over

his cockhead and moaning again. "Close."

"Oh, fuck. So fucking sexy." Christian sped his

strokes to match Matt's. Matt rolled his balls and pushed
against his perineum, finally losing it and shooting over
his stomach. Christian came a second later.

Matt looked over at him and chuckled. "Come here

before you fall over."

Christian laughed and crossed the few steps to the

bed, flopping down next to Matt. "That was hot."

"Uh-huh. And now we're all sticky." Matt laughed.
"I'm too tired to shower."
"Too lazy to shower." Matt jumped out of the way of

Christian's half-hearted swat.

"Hey! I worked and studied all day!"
"I know, babe." Matt leaned down and kissed

Christian. "Get naked, now."

"Matt." The word sounded more like a moan.
"Sleep, Christian. It's late." Matt kissed him one more

time before crawling under the covers.

Christian sighed dramatically. "I see how it's going to

be. I'm moving in and you're losing interest already."

Matt just laughed at him. "Yep. No more sex or

Where You Least Expect It - 189

snuggling and I'm going to start reading the paper at
breakfast and ignoring you."

Christian pulled the covers up and curled up on

Matt's chest. "Damn. I guess I need to make the most of
this, then."

Matt's arms tightened around him. "Yep."

***

When Matt got home from work Monday night, he

could smell tomato sauce simmering. He dropped his
coat on the couch and went to watch Christian bounce
around the kitchen stirring the pots and pulling a loaf of
bread from the oven. Christian smiled at Matt standing
in the kitchen doorway.

"Hey, you. Ow." Christian dropped the bread on the

counter.

"Don't burn yourself." Matt crossed the room and

kissed Christian's fingertips. "You didn't have to cook."
He leaned down and kissed Christian gently.

"I know." Christian blushed. "I wanted to. It's the first

thing we made together, well, except for Thanksgiving,
but that seemed like a lot more effort."

"You're a sap, and I think your noodles are going to

boil over."

"Crap." Christian turned the stove down and grabbed

the colander. "Go change, honey, it's almost ready."

Matt watched Christian fuss for another moment

before going to change out of his work clothes. When he
got back, Christian was placing serving bowls on the
table. Christian smiled and walked into Matt's embrace,
arms wrapping around his neck and face tilting up for a
kiss.

Matt happily obliged, pulling Christian close and

kissing him thoroughly. "Mmm, spaghetti sauce and

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garlic. Yum."

"Let's eat so I can have my wicked way with you

later."

Matt grinned. "Wicked way, huh? What do you have

in mind?"

Christian tilted his head and Matt could practically

see the wheels turning. "Whatever you want, honey. I
can think of lots of things."

"Yeah? I can think of a couple of things we haven't

done yet." Matt felt his face grow warm; he hated
blushing, but damn, the things he was thinking about
doing with Christian. He didn't miss the heat that flared
in Christian eyes.

"Oh." The sound was soft. Christian kissed him and

pulled away. "Come on, before it gets cold."

They sat at the table and chatted about their day; Matt

tried to ignore the feeling of anticipation. Matt moaned
over the garlic bread and stole the last bite of spaghetti
from Christian's plate. Christian rolled his eyes and got
up to look through a cabinet for storage containers. Matt
stepped up behind him and pulled a couple of containers
down.

"You cooked. I can clean this up."
Christian leaned back against him. "It'll be faster if

we do it together."

"True." Matt leaned down and kissed him, fingers

splayed across Christian's stomach.

Christian covered Matt's hand with his own. "Nice."
He held Christian for another minute before moving

away to start cleaning up their dinner. Christian loaded
the empty plates and bowls into the dishwasher while
Matt took care of storing the leftovers. He watched as
Christian added soap and set the cycle.

Christian smiled over at him. "Hey."
Matt reached out and tugged Christian up against

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him. "Hey." Christian's hands landed on his shoulders.
Matt kissed him once before pulling away and leading
Christian to the bedroom.

He stood by the bed and held Christian lightly, hands

rubbing up and down Christian's back. He felt
Christian's hands rest just above the curve of his ass. He
leaned down and kissed Christian gently, starting with
barely-there brushes of his lips against Christian's and
slowly increasing the pressure, letting the heat between
them build. Christian responded eagerly, hands sliding
down to cup Matt's ass. Christian's lips parted slightly,
encouraging Matt's tongue to slip in and taste.

Matt moaned as his tongue stroked through

Christian's mouth, tasting the wine they had with dinner
and the sweet taste that was unique to Christian. He
pulled Christian closer and deepened the kiss. Christian's
hands moved over his ass, moving lower to tease him
through his jeans. Matt thrust his hips forward to rub
against Christian. He pulled back and rested their
foreheads together as he tried to catch his breath. His
tugged Christian's T-shirt up and off, missing the loss of
Christian's hands on his ass.

Christian didn't hesitate in pulling Matt's shirt off as

well, running his hands across Matt's pecs and
shoulders. "Damn you're hot, Matt."

Matt flexed before kissing Christian's shoulder.

"You're not so bad yourself, you know."

Christian shuddered. "Not too skinny?"
"Uh-uh," Matt muttered against Christian's skin.

Christian tilted his head to give Matt more room, letting
Matt trail kisses up Christian's neck to suck on his
earlobe. Christian let out a startled yelp when Matt
nipped at him. Christian's mouth found his again and the
next was harder, more forceful. Matt's hands moved
along Christian's spine, feeling muscles flex. Christian's

Where You Least Expect It - 192

fingers dug into Matt's muscles.

Matt moved a hand around Christian's waist and

rubbed Christian's erection through his jeans. "I want
you."

Christian responded with a moan, cock jerking hard

under Matt's palm. "Matt. I -- are you sure?" Christian
looked up at him, eyes hot.

"I'm sure. I trust you. You always look so hot when I

fuck you, I want to know what it feels like, Chris."

Christian moaned again and kissed Matt, tongue wet

and hot in Matt's mouth. Christian's hands grabbed
Matt's ass again, pulling Matt against him and grinding
their cocks together just for a minute before undoing the
button and zipper on Matt's jeans.

Matt kept the kiss going while Christian opened his

pants and slid them over his hips. "You, too," he
mumbled, undoing Christian's pants and shoving them
out of the way. He reached around and wrapped a hand
around both of their pricks, the heat of them together
making him ache.

"You're making it hard to go slow." Christian was

practically panting.

Matt gave them another squeeze. "Well, something's

certainly hard."

"Oh, fuck. Bed, honey."
"Yeah." Matt threw the blankets back and knelt on

the bed, pulling Christian with him. He picked the kiss
up where it had left off, letting their bodies rub together.
Breaking the kiss, Matt lay back and stretched. Christian
followed, lying half across Matt's chest, one hand
stroking through Matt's hair and the other moving
aimlessly over Matt's chest. Christian kissed him,
fingers finding a nipple and tweaking it, drawing a gasp
from Matt. Christian kissed down Matt's body, pausing
to pay attention to both nipples, his navel, the spot just

Where You Least Expect It - 193

above Matt's hip that made him writhe. He moaned as
Christian bypassed his cock to focus on the crease where
his thigh and pelvis met. Christian crawled back up and
kissed Matt again while grabbing the lube and condoms
from the nightstand.

"Let me know if it's too much, okay?"
Matt brushed his thumb against Christian's lower lip.

"I will."

Christian nipped Matt's fingers and started kissing

him again. Matt's heart rate sped up when he heard the
sound of the lube opening but he focused on their kiss,
trusting Christian to take care of him. He could feel the
wet trail of precome that Christian's dick was leaving on
his hip. He shifted, bending one knee, making the
invitation obvious. Christian sucked on his bottom lip
and Matt felt slick fingers touch the sensitive skin
behind his balls. He spread further, wanting Christian's
touch. Christian's fingers moved further back, circling
his hole and making him whimper before one finger
slowly stroked in and out. Matt started thrusting against
Christian.

"More. Please."
A soft moan escaped Christian as he added a second

finger, waiting for Matt to adjust before beginning to
stroke again, spreading Matt slowly.

Christian broke the kiss and sat up. "I want to watch."
Matt rocked himself onto Christian's fingers, shouting

when Christian found his gland. "Oh, God, Christian."

"So hot." Matt could see Christian's cock leaking,

could feel his own cock throb in response.

"In me, Christian. Please."
Christian stroked a few more times before pulling his

fingers out and positioning himself between Matt's legs.
He reached for the condoms, eyes locked with Matt's as
he tore one off and rolled it on.

Where You Least Expect It - 194

Matt picked the lube up and squirted some into his

hand. "Let me."

Matt reached out to slick Christian up. Christian

closed his eyes momentarily as Matt stroked up and
down his shaft.

Matt let go and spread himself wide. "Chris."
"Oh, fuck, yes. God." Matt watched as Christian

started pushing forward. Christian was definitely wider
than two fingers and the stretch burned for a minute as
Matt's muscles adjusted. Christian leaned forward to kiss
Matt, arms braced on either side of Matt's shoulders.
Matt relaxed into the kiss, letting it distract him. He
slowly started rocking against Christian.

Christian looked down at him. "So tight. Hot. Ready,

honey?"

"Fuck yes. Do it."
Christian groaned in answer and started thrusting.

Matt let out a long groan and rocked his hips, meeting
Christian thrust for thrust. It wasn't long before
Christian's speed increased and he started fucking Matt
in earnest. Matt started babbling, encouraging Christian.
He wrapped one hand around his own cock and stroked
himself in time, moving between his fist and Christian's
prick.

"Oh, fuck, babe. Good."
"Matt. It's fucking good."
"Yeah. Yeah. Close. Fuck me. Fuck. Oh, fuck."

Matt's balls started tingling and he couldn't hold back
anymore. He threw his head back and shot, Christian's
cock hitting his gland and making it that much more
intense.

"Matt!" Christian shouted and went still. Matt could

feel Christian pulse inside him. His own dick gave one
final twitch in response.

Matt wrapped his arms around Christian when he

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collapsed on Matt's chest. Matt's breathing slowly
returned to normal and he nuzzled Christian's spiky hair.
"Hey. No falling asleep with the condom on."

Christian rewarded him with a startled laugh. "Okay."
He shifted up, kissing Matt before taking care of the

condom and crawling back into Matt's arms. They
curled together, kissing slowly.

"You're okay? I didn't hurt you?" Christian asked.
"I'm good. You didn't hurt me." Matt kissed him and

grinned. "I might even let you do it again."

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Epilogue

As Matt left work the first Friday in May, he was

pleased that the weather was finally turning mild after a
long and wet winter. Early spring could be almost as
unpredictable as fall, but today was sunny and almost
warm, trees beginning to put on new leaves and early
flowers blooming.

Christian was waiting for him when Matt got out of

work, sitting at one of the outside tables reading a
textbook. Christian looked up as Matt got closer and
smiled.

"Hi."
"Hi. How was class?"
Christian rolled his eyes. "Sometimes I wonder how

some of these people got this far." Matt laughed as
Christian started ranting about his less than stellar
classmates as he shoved his books into his bag. Christian
stood and hefted the bag over his shoulder. "Ready?"

"Yep." Matt leaned down for a quick kiss. He still

wasn't completely comfortable being out, but he had a
hard time not kissing his lover hello. Christian blinked at
him and smiled.

"So what do you want to do for dinner?" Christian

asked as they walked toward Matt's truck.

"I don't know. I wanted to stop somewhere first, but

we have time to figure something out."

Christian looked at him with curiosity. "Where are

we going?"

Matt glanced at him out of the corner of his eye,

suppressing a grin. "It's a surprise."

"Really? I love surprises."
They settled in the truck and Matt leaned over to kiss

Christian again. "I know."

Ten minutes later, Christian was looking at him

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curiously when Matt parked the truck.

"The park?" Christian seemed confused.
"Yep." He caught Christian's eye roll out of the

corner of his eye.

Christian followed him out of the truck. "So, what are

we doing?"

Matt shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets,

suddenly feeling self conscious. Maybe this was a dumb
idea after all. "I thought we could go for a walk." He
relaxed when Christian smiled.

"Okay."
Matt realized he was staring at Christian with what he

suspected was a very sappy expression. "Okay." He
turned and started walking toward the lake. He still felt
silly, but Christian looked happy, so that made it
worthwhile.

The park was busy; kids ran around and rode their

bikes, college students lounged around on blankets
pretending to study. Matt and Christian were only one of
the couples walking around the lake.

"So, what's up?" Christian finally asked.
Matt smiled. "Can't a guy just want to go for a walk?"
Christian was still looking at him. "Okay."
Matt laughed; he enjoyed teasing Christian. "The first

time I drove you home, you managed to sound
completely enthralled by that horrible fall weather. I
thought you might want to experience something, I don't
know, less wet." Matt winked. "Besides, it's been, what,
three months since you moved in? That's kind of a
milestone, don't you think?"

Christian beamed at him. "An anniversary walk?"
"I thought it was more like an anniversary date.

Come on, walk around the lake with me and I'll buy you
dinner."

"Thai?"

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"Sure." Matt took Christian's hand and continued

their walk as the sun set over the lake. Three months
certainly wasn't a lifetime, but they'd come so far from
where they were Matt was confident this was only the
first of many anniversaries.

END

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