y eyes are glazing over as I sort through the never-ending ton of emails that are coming for my
boss.Anybodywhoknowshisactualemailaddressemailshimdirectly,butIhandlehispublicly

availableemailaddress.About90%oftheemailsarecrazy,butIpassonmaybe10%.Itworksforhim.
It’sapart-timejobforme.

Icometoworkafterclasseachday,dressedinbusinessprofessionalandwadingthroughatorrentof

emails.Iwanttoquitthough,becauseIcan’tstopfantasizingaboutmyboss,Lincoln.

He has dark hair with a handful of silver streaks running through it, but his hair only enhances how

gorgeousheis.He’smydad’sbestfriend,sohe’salwaysbeenaround.

AndI’vealwayshadacrushonhim.
Today,theamazinggraysuitthathe’swearingfitshimperfectly,likeallofhissuits.They’retailored

specificallyforhim.Hecan’tbuyofftherack,withhislinebackershouldersandslenderwaist.Helooks
like a model and did a little modeling in college for spare money, before he founded his own software
company.Heandmydadlovetogooutontheweekend,gointothemountains,andtotallyunplug.I’ve
beenalongafewtimes,butit’shardtosleepinatentonlyafewfeetawayfromhimandmydad.

It’scrazythatsomeoneafraidthatshe’llshowherfeelingsactuallyisworkingforhercrush,butthat’s

howithappened.Ineededasummerjob.Hissecretary,Amanda,wasonmaternityleave.Mydadthought
itwasaperfectfit.

SonowI’mstuckinanunendinghell,fantasizingaboutamanIcanneverhave.

“C

OME

INTO

OFFICE

.”LincolnissotallthatIhavetotiltbackmyheadtolookupathim.

“Coming,sir.”Istraightenmyskirt,smoothingitdownmythighs.ItrodeupwhileIwassitting,

almostexposingalittletoomuch.

WhenIstepintohisoffice,hetellsme,“Closethedoor.”
I turn to close it. Then I feel his big body behind me, his heat searing my skin even through our

clothes.Hiscockispressingintomylowerback.

“I’mtiredofyouteasingme,”hewhisperssoftly.“Soyou’regoingtogetwhatyou’vebeenasking

for.”

Webothhearthesoftsoundofmyzippergoingdown,down,down,justamillimeteratatime.My

heartispoundinglikeadrum.Mybodyiscrushedbetweenthewooddoorandhishardbody.Icanfeel
hiserectionpulseoncebehindme.

Steppingback,hepushesmyskirtoffofmyhips.
“Stepoutofit,”hecommands.

Istepoutofit.I’mstillwearingmyblouse,abra,ablacklacethong,andheels.
Hesnapsthewaistbandofmythong.
“Takethisoff.”
Allofthisissoinappropriate.“Idon’tthink…”
“Don’tthink.Doasyou’retold.”Hishandspanksmyrightcheek.“Now.”
Withshakinghands,Ipulloffmythong.Nowmytophalfiscovered,butmybottomhalfisbare.
Icanhearathudassomethinghitstheground.Hishandsarepullingmyasscheeksapart.ThenI

feelatonguebetweenmylegs.

“Ohmygod,”Igasp.
“Bequiet,”hesays.“Don’tmakeasound.”
Icanfeelhistongueentermeagain.Mylowerbodyismelting.Idon’tknowifIcanbequiet.
Hishandisnowtouchingmyclit,rubbingitoverandoverashistongueisstillinsideofmyfolds.

Mylegsareshakingandnolongerabletoholdmeup.

“Link,”Iwhisper.
Heslapsmyassagain,buthehitsharderthistime.“Itoldyoutobequiet.IguessIneedtogag

you.”

Ihearsomesoftsoundsbeforehe’sshovinghistieintomymouth.
“Mmph!”Iprotest.
Hebitesmyear.“Icantakeitout.Icantakeitoutrightnow.Youcantakeyourskirtandgoright

backtoyourdesk.OrIcanmakeyoucome.Makeanothersound,andI’llsendyouaway,wetornot.”

I’mquiet.
“That’swhatIthought.”

“

C L O S I N G T I M E

LIN C O LN

amilla.”

Herbeautifulbrowneyesgouptomeetmine.Herfaceflushesalittle.

“Yes,sir.WhatcanIdoforyou?”
“It’stimetogohome.”Ipointattheclock.“Everyoneleftahalfhourago.It’sjustyouandme.You

shouldgethome,orI’llhavetohaveatalkwithyourdadaboutappropriatework-lifebalance.”

“Rightaway.”Herfaceisstillflushed.
Iwatchasshebendsovertogetherbackpack.She’sagoodgirl.Iknowthatshecomesherestraight

fromthe summer classesshe’s taking ata local community college.My buddy wantsto teach her about
responsibility and the value of a dollar, so even though he’s perfectly capable of providing for her, he
makesherworkduringthesummertopadherresume.

It’s been sheer hell. She always wears these tight skirts that emphasize the curve of her hips,

especiallywhenshe’sbentoverlikesheisnow.I’vespentthissummeradjustingmyerectionbecauseit’s
so inappropriate for me to feel this way about my temporary secretary. When my normal secretary,
Amanda,toldmethatshewasknockedupandtakingadvantageofthestandardthreemonthsofmaternity
leave,Iwaspanicking.ButmybuddyJacksaidtogivehislittlegirlajob,andhereweare.I’mstaringat
her red skirt pulling tight against her ass while she throws things into her bag. There aren’t any visible
pantylines,whichmeansthatshe’swearingathongorgoingbare.

ThethoughtofCamillagoingbaremakesmeharderthanever.IfIdon’tstopstaringathercurvyass,

I’mgoingtodripsomepre-come.

Then she’s standing up and sliding her backpack on her shoulders. “I’m going home. I’ll see you

tomorrow.”

“Seeyoutomorrow.”
Iwatchasshewalkstotheelevators.Hercurlyhairbounceswitheverystep.There’ssomethingso

cheerful about her. Her dad calls her Sunshine, and it’s a nickname that I use occasionally, too. She’s
sweet,happy,andlightandalwayshasbeen.

Ilookdownatmypants.I’vetuckedmyerectioninmywaistband,butit’sthrobbingangrily.Itknows

whatitwants,eventhoughit’llnevergetit.Herdadwouldblowmyballsoffwithhisshotgun,andthat’d
onlybethefirststep.

“Down,boy.”
But my erection persists, and I have to resort to something that has happened with increasing

frequencythissummer.

Igototheprivatebathroomconnectedtomyoffice,unzipmypants,pulloutmydick,andclosemy

eyes.

AMILLA

KNEELING

in front of me, her big brown eyes wide. Her full lips are pouting, ready for my

cock,butI’mnotreadytogiveittoher.

Notuntilshebegs.
“Please,sir.”
Iclosemyeyes,hersweetvoicesoseductivethatit’shardnottogiveittoher.
“Convincemethatyouwantit.”
“Ineedit,”shemurmurs,hereyesheatingup.“Ineedtosuckyourcock.”
Irubthetipagainsthercheek.Sheturnsherhead,tryingtotakeitintohermouth,butIpullaway

beforeshecan.

“Howmuchdoyouneedit?”
“Morethananythingintheworld.”Shelicksherlips.“Ineeditmorethananythingever.”
Myhandcaressesherjaw,andthenI’mforcinghermouthopenasIshovetheentirelengthinside.

ShegaspsandgagsalittleasIenterherthroat.Herhandsareboundbehindherbackwithhandcuffs,
soshehasnocontrolinthissituation.Therearetearsinhereyesfromthesuddennessofmyentry.

Myhandsslideintoherhair.She’sobedientlysuckingmeintohermouth.IwatcheachtimeasI

thrust and retreat, thrust and retreat. My balls draw up and I feel the tingle in my spine that means
thatI’mreadytoshoot.

Oneofmyhandsslidestothebackofherneck,holdingherrightwhereIwantherasIgruntand

unloadmyseedintoherwet,warmmouth.

“Swallow,”Itellher.“Takeitall.”
I watch her throat work as she tries to swallow all of it, but it’s too much for her. A little white

comeiscomingoutofthecornerofhermouth.

OPEN

EYES

, panting a little from the force of my orgasm. I clean up and flush everything down the

toilet.

Shemakesmehardseveraltimesaday.IfIignoreit,myblueballsmakeitclearthatIneedtounload

inher.I’vebarelybeenabletocontrolmyself,andonlythethoughtofcastrationandbetrayingmyfriend
Jackstopmefromactingonmyfantasies.ButIknowthatitwouldruineverything.

One more week, and I’ll have my normal secretary Amanda back. One more week, and temptation

willgobacktoschoolfull-time.I’mabouttogoinsane.

Thisweekcan’tendsoonenough.

E M A I L

LIN C O LN

henextafternoon,I’mcominginfromalunchmeetingwhenIseeher.Shehasbigheadphoneson.
They’reconnectedtoherphonewhileshesortsthroughalltheemailthathasaccumulatedinthe

lastday.

“Camilla.”
Sheflushesthesamewayasshepushesherheadphonesoffsothatthey’rearoundherneck.
“HowcanIhelpyou,sir?”
“Ineedyoutogetmeadoubleshotofespressofromthecafénextdoorassoonaspossible.”Ineed

thecaffeine.I’dliketobedrinkingsomewhiskey,butit’salittleearlyinthedayforthat.Plusalcohol
loweringmyinhibitionsisaterribleideawhenallIwanttodoisbendmybestfriend’sdaughterovermy
deskandfuckheruntilshe’sscreamingmynamesothatthewholeofficecanhearherandknowthatshe’s
mine.

Badidea.
“Sure,sir.”
“Andyoucangrabsomethingforyourself.Putitonthecompanyaccount.”
“Right away.” She stands up, tugging her skirt down. Her breasts jiggle just a little bit. God,

everythingshedoesentrancesme.Shemakesmethinklikeahornyteenager.I’msurprisedthatthereisn’t
drooldrippingoffmychin.

Shehasitall:beauty,brains,efficiency,andasenseofhumor.Ifsheweretwodecadesolder,we’dbe

marriedalready.

Shewalkstowardstheelevator.I’madmiringhersmooth,sexywalkbeforeIshakemyheadandturn

around.I’mabouttoheadintomyofficewhenIseetheemailthat’sonherscreen.

Thesubjectlinesays“Today’sLincolnFantasy”.
IknowthatI’msnoopingintoaprivatefile,butcomeon.Mynameisthere.Surelythatgivesmeafree

pass.

Ilookaroundtheoffice.Nobodyispayingattention.Thesalesteamthatisnormallyonthisflooris

out at some corporate retreat, setting sales goals for the next quarter. The people who are here aren’t
lookingatme.

Isitdownatherdeskandreadtherestofit.

GOD

,Kelly,Ican’tstopthinkingabouthim.Iwanthisperfectmouthonmine.Iwanthimtopin

meagainstthewallandholdmeinplaceuntilIbeghimtostopbecauseIcan’ttakeanymore.And
thenIwanthimtokeepgoinganyway.

Ican’thandleworkinghereanymore,Kels.It’sgoingtobehellthisweek.It’sonlyTuesday,soI

havethreemoredaystogo.

I’m so wet that I think that I’ve soaked through my panties and onto my skirt. Just smelling his

scentmakesmewet.Hedoesn’tevenhavetobehere.

IcannevertellhimthatIwanthimtoshovemeface-downonhisdesk,tiemyhandswithhistie,

andfuckmeuntilmymindexplodesintoathousandpieces.He’lltellmydadthatIwasinappropriate
atwork,andthenI’llgetyelledat.Idon’twanttobecutoff.

EYEBROWS

ARE

RAISED

.Shewasafraidofmetellingherdadhowshefelt?Notachanceinhell,notifI

wantedtokeepmyballs.He’dshowupatmyofficewithashotguninaheartbeat.

Shefeltthesameway.Mymindranthroughthepossibilities.
Sheshouldn’tworryaboutbeingcutoff.Icanprovideforheraseasilyasherfathercan.Better,even,

sinceI’dnevermakeherworkjustforthesakeofworking.

MaybeIshouldplanasurpriseforwhenshecomesbackwithmycoffee.

C O F F E E

C A MILLA

hecoffeeisalmosttoohottohandle.Iknowthatthecup’smaterialissupposedtoinsulateit,but
it’s almost hot enough to scorch my hand. I was in such a hurry to get back that I forgot to get

coffeecollars.Idon’twanttogobackandgetsome.IhopeLincolndoesn’tyellatmeforforgetting.

No, that’s dumb. He doesn’t yell at me for stupid stuff. He’s demanding and expects perfection, but

he’dneveryellatmeforforgettingacoffeecollarforhiscup.He’sprettyfair.

He comes down like the wrath of God when he’s provoked, though. One of the financial analysts

forgottosendhimasalesreportbeforeameetingonce,andIlistenedwhenherippedtheanalystanew
one.

I’dbeensoturnedonthatafterIlistenedtothefuryinhisvoice,I’dgonetothebathroomandtaken

careofmyself.Heneverletpeopleforgetwhowasincharge.

IamquicklyforgettinghowhotthecoffeeI’mholdingis.Ihittheelevatorbuttonforthetopfloorwith

myelbow.Threemoredaysofworkingashisassistant,andthenallofthiswillbeover.

It’llbearelief,butI’malsoafraidthatI’llregretnotmakingamoveonhimwhenIhadthechance.

He probably sees me as nothing more than a little girl, but I’ve had a crush on him forever. My dad
snores,buthedoesn’t.Iknow,sinceI’vesleptsoclosetohiminthemountainstimeandtimeagain.

Myhandstightenalittleonthecoffeecups,butthentheheatmakesmeloosenmygrip.
Threemoredays.
WhenIgetbacktoourcorneroftheoffice,Iseethathisdoorisopen.Iwalkintohisofficeandsee

himstaringathiscomputerscreen.

“I brought your coffee, sir.” I never called him sir before I came to work for him, but it seems

respectful.Polite.Itcreatesagoodemployee-bossrelationship.

“Camilla,stayinhereforamoment,please.”It’snotaquestion.Iputbothcoffeecupsdownonhis

desk.

“Thegrandeoneisforyou.”Ionlyhaveadecaftalllatte,becauseit’safternoonandI’llbeupuntil

midnightifIdrinkcaffeinatedanythingrightnow.

“Couldyouclosethedoor?”
Myheartjumpsatarequestsoclosetoyesterday’sfantasy,butI’mbeingdumb.He’sjustaskingmeto

closeadoor,nottogetnakedandsweatywithhim.Icursemybrainforgivingmeafull-colorvisualof
whatthatwouldbelike,mysoftbodybeneathhishardone.We’vegoneswimminginlakes.Iknowthat
hehastight,hardmusclesandwashboardabs.Hedefinitelydoesn’tlooklikeyouraveragepencilpusher.

“Surething.”
Istandupandclosethedoor.Ihearthesmallthud.
“Andlockit.”
MyheartstartsbeatingsofastandhardthatIcanhearitinmyears.

“Lockit?”Iturntohimwithalittlepanicinmyeyes.Ihavenoideawhat’sgoingon.
“Lockit,”herepeats.Iknowthathe’swaitingformetodoit.Withanaudiblegulp,Iturnthelock.

R E A D I N G

LIN C O LN

henshespinsaround,hernipplesarehard,pokingout.

“Comeoverhere.”Thecoffeecupsaresittingononecornerofmydesk.Shesitsdowninthe

chairinfrontofmydesk.

“Whatdoyouneed,sir?”ShelookslikeI’mgoingtopulloutanironmaidenorsomething.
“Iwanttotalktoyouaboutyouremails.”
“Whatemails?”Icanseeherpulsepickupinherthroat.
“Theonesthatyou’vebeensendingtoyourbestfriend,Kelly.”
Herfacegetsalittlepaler.“Ican’t…youhaven’t…didyoureadthem?”
“Idid.”
Ifpossible,shegrowsevenmorepale.
“Icanexplain.”
Imotionforhertocontinue.Herhandgoestotwirlacurlaroundherfinger.
“Ijust…Ican’t…”
Istandupandputafingeronherlips.
“Ireadallofthem.”
Insteadofgoingpale,herfaceflushes.Ismileslowly,eventhoughIknowshe’sdeeplyembarrassed.I

sitbackinmychair.

“Areyougoingtotellmydad?”shesqueaks.“Please,pleasedon’t.”
“Hush,sweetheart.That’snotwhatIhadinmind.”
“ThenwhyamIhere?”Sheturnstolookatthelockeddoor.“Andwhyisthedoorlocked?”
“Doyouknowhowstringentthesexualharassmentpoliciesarehere?”
“No.”Sheturnsbacktolookatme.
“They’reverystrict.Imadethemmyself.Mymotherwassexuallyharassedbyherbossfordecades,

andIsworethatitwouldneverhappeninanycompanythatIwastheheadof.Notonmywatch.”

Shenods.“Protectingwomen.Igetit.”
“Andthat’sthereasonwhywecan’tactonyourlittlefantasies.LiketheonewhereIpinyouagainst

thewallandmakeyoucomeevenwhenyoutellmetostop.”

“Youreadthat?!”shesqueaks.“Ihaven’tevensentthatoneyet.”
“Ireadthemall,theonesyousentandtheonesthataredrafts.They’reallonyourcorporateemail,so

you have no reasonable expectation of privacy. You’re very imaginative, Camilla.” My tongue caresses
hername.

“What’sgoingtohappennow?”
“Ithoughtyou’dneverask.”Istoodup.“Iwantyoutotakeoffyourskirt.”
“ButI…butyoujustsaid…sexualharassmentpolicies…”

“Now,Camilla.”
Shestandsupandreachesbehindhertounzipherskirt.Thepositionispushingherbreastsout,and

they didn’t need it. Her young breasts are firm, full, and perky, the sort of thing that you find in a
centerfold. Her buttons are straining to contain her breasts, and I can see some hints of smooth, golden
brownskin.

She’s wearing a tiny black lace thong that barely covers anything. She’s standing there, her face

flushed,uncertainofwhat’sgoingtohappennext.Herskirtisontheground.

“Ican’ttouchyou,Camilla.Ican’tdoitwhileyou’reonthepayroll.”
“Thenwhyismyskirtoff?”Sheblinksatme,ahintoffearinherbrowneyes.
“Becauseyou’regoingtotouchyourself,Camilla.”
Shegaspsalittle,hereyesgettingbig.“ButI…I’venever…”
“You’venevermasturbatedinfrontofanyoneelsebefore?”
Shenods.
“Howoldareyou?”
“Nineteen,”shewhispers.
Nineteen.Soyoung.Ihavenobusinessdoingthiswithagirlthatyoung.
Butthere’sadevilinsidemethatsays,“Putyourhandinthefrontofyourpanties.”
Iwatchasherhandsettlesonthefrontofthesweetjunctionofherthighs.
“Nowrubyourclituntilyoucome.”
“Standing?”
Imotiontothecouchinmyoffice.
“Layingdown.Spreadyourlegs.”
Shewalksovertothecouch,herhandstilltrappedinherthong,andshelaysdown.Herlegsarefar

apartnow,andIblessherregularyogapractice.

“Likethis?”
Thethongisannoyingme,obstructingmyviewofherpussy.
“Takeyourthongoff.”
Shetakesherhandoutandpullsoffherthong.
“Andyourshirt.”
She unbuttons each button slowly. Her hands are shaking. Arousal, excitement, and a hint of fear, I

think. Anybody could come up to my door and find it locked. It wouldn’t take a genius to realize that
Camillawasinsidemyofficewithme.

Her generous breasts are filling up a black lace push-up bra. God, I want to take those luscious

moundsintomymouth.Iclenchmyfists.

Threemoredays.ThenIcanhavehereverywaythatIwant.
“Pleasureyourself,”Iorder.“IwanttoseeyoucomeonmycouchwhileIreadoneofyouremailsto

you.”

Her eyes meet mine as her hand goes between her legs again. Soon, she’s rubbing herself back and

forth, back and forth. I have to unzip myself before my pants strangle my erection. I’m slowly stroking
myselftothesightofherspreadoutonmycouch.

Thesmellofherarousalfillstheair.Icanfeelmyselfreleasealittlepre-come.

CAN

’

BELIEVE

thesuithewaswearingtoday.He’salwayshot,Kels,buttodayhewasagod.

Ithinkthatawomanmusthavehand-madethatsuitforhim,becauseitloveshim.Everythingthat

hewearsfitswell,butthissuitlooksevenbetterthantheothers.

Hisredpowertieisgivingmeideas.Iwanthimtocallmeintohisofficeandthenshovemedown

on his couch, forcing my legs apart and tying my hands above my head. I want him to dry hump me
until we’re both ready. Then he’ll tear my skirt and thong off before going down on me. Once I’ve
come,he’llridemeuntilneitherofuscanmove.

CAN

HEAR

hermoanalittle.

“Keepgoing,”Iencourageher.
Idon’tthinkthatsheneedsencouragement.Hereyesareclosed.She’spantingfastnow.Icanseeher

breastsmovewitheachquickintakeofbreath.

“Mmm,” she moans quietly. Her legs are shaking. Her mouth is open. Her back is arching as she

shakesalloverfromherorgasminfrontofme.

Thenit’sover.Mycockisstillhard,butItuckitbackintomypants.Thistimeisforher,notforme.
“Beautiful,”Isay,andsheopenshereyestostarerightatme.Shelooksatherjuice-coveredhandlike

itbelongstoastrangerandblusheshard.

“Idon’tknow…whatjusthappened.”
“Doyouwantmetorecapforyou?Indetail?”
She’ssittinguponmycouchnow.“No!”Shegoestogettheskirtfromwhereshedroppeditearlier.I

enjoythesightofherbentover,herassperfectlydisplayedforme.Shepullsituparoundherhips.She
searchesforherthong,butIsay,“Leaveit.”

“Leavewhat?”
“Yourthong.IwanttosmellitwhileIwaitforyou.”
She’sspeechless,hermouthopeningandclosingwithoutawordcomingout.
“We’redonehere,”Isay,beforeshecanrecover.“Andyoucangohomenow.I’llseeyoutomorrow.”
Shenevertookoffhershoes.Ihearthemclickasshegoestothedoor,unlocksit,andheadsbackto

herdesk.Idon’tknowiftheotherpeopleouttherewillsmellherarousalonher.I’mtornwhetherIwant
themtoornot.Ononehand,I’mskatingclosetotheedgeofasexualharassmentlawsuit.Ontheother,I
wantthemtoknowthatI’vebeenpleasuringher.

Ilookatthetwocupsofcoffeeonmydesk.Idrinkthegrandeone,eventhoughit’sgonealittlecold.I

drinkasipofhers,too,sothatI’llknowherdrinkorder.

It tastes foul. Decaf. I dump it out in my sink. Well, if that’s what she wants, that’s what she’ll get.

Whatevershewants.

L A S T D A Y

C A MILLA

THREEDAYSLATER

t’sFriday,mylastdayofwork.I’mabouttogobacktoschoolnow.

Lincoln has been nothing but professional after that time in his office. I almost think that I

imaginedit.Ihaven’teventoldKellyaboutit,andshe’salreadyaskedmewhyIstoppedsendinghermy
fantasies via email when we’re both at work. I don’t want to tell her about it. It seems like a secret,
perfectdream.Evenifthewholethingwasafigmentofmyimagination,I’mgoingtoholditinmyheart
untiltheendoftime.

Thelookinhiseyeswhenhewatchedme.Thewarmthofhisvoicewhenhereadmyemailtome.The

soundofhishandgoingupanddownhishardcock.Allthosethingswereincredible.

My phone buzzes, telling me that the alarm that I set for five o’clock is on. Half the people in the

officetelecommuteonFridays,andtheotherhalfareoutearly.It’stheweekendnow.LincolnandIarethe
onlyonesstillintheoffice.

Lincolnisinhisoffice,soIknockonthedoor.
“Link?” I open the door and walk into his office. I can see big stacks of paper on his desk. He’s

overseeingsomeacquisitionofatechcompanythathasanappthatwe’dliketohave.

“Yeah?”
“I’mout.Thanksforgivingmeajob.I’llseeyouwhenyoucomeoverfordinner.”
“Comehereandclosethedoor.”
Helookslikealionwhohasn’tbeenfedinmonths.Ikindoffeellikerunningaway,butmytraitorous

nipplesaregettinghard,rememberingwhatitwasliketostretchoutonhiscouch.

“Idon’tknowifthat’sagoodidea.”
“Youdon’tworkformeanymore.Ithinkthatit’sagreatidea.Butit’syourchoice.”
IlookattheopendoorandthenatLincoln.
AndthenIcloseit.
Hissmileisbright.
“That’swhatIhopedyou’dchoose.”He’suntyinghistienow.
“Iworetheredonetoday.Iknowyoulikeit.”
Icanfeelmybreathingpickupalittle.
“Areyougoingto…”
“Playoutoneofyourfantasies?Youbet.”
Hecomestowardsmeandcrowdsmeagainstthewall.
“Handsupaboveyourhead.”

Staring into his eyes, I can see the blackness expand as I put my hands above my head. Then he’s

brisklytyingthemtogether.

Thenhishardbodyispushingmeagainstthewall.Icanfeelmyselfgettingwet.Hisharderectionis

diggingintomystomach.

“Isthisasgoodasyouimagined?”
Ishiver.“Better.”
I’mwearingpantstoday.Hishandsareonmypant’sbutton,andthenhe’sunzippingthemandpulling

mypantsandthongdownaroundmyankles.Hepullsoffoneshoecarefully,andthenhe’spullingoffthe
other.Mypantsandthongareontheground.

“Kneel.”
Ikneelinfrontofhim.I’veneversuckedanybodyoffbefore,butI’mgladthatit’shim.
Myhandsmightbetiedtogether,butIcanstillusethem.I’velearnedenoughfromKellytoknowthatI

needtoputafistaroundwhateverIcan’tfitinsideofmymouth.

Ileanitbuthebacksaway.
“Youhavetowantit.”
I lean forward, grab his cock, tug it, and then put it into my mouth. I hum a little around it, which

makeshimgasp.Icanfeelhimshootalittlepre-comeintomymouth,whichIswallow.

ThenI’mstrokinghiscock,usingthesmoothsilkofhistie,andfondlinghisballsashethrustsback

andforthinsideofmymouth.

“Uh.Ah.”
Asaltystreamofseedisspillinginsideofmymouth.Iswallowitup,maintainingeyecontactwith

himasheunloadsinsideofmymouth.

Then it’s over. He pulls his cock out of my mouth. I know that it’s softening, but my mouth feels so

emptynow.

“You’regoingtobendovermydesknow.”
Ilookathisdesk,stillcoveredinstacksofpaper.
“Butwhatabouttheacquisition?”
Heshoveseverythingoffofhisdesk.Thepapersspillontothefloor,coveringthecarpetwithpapers

thatarerapidlygettingmixedwitheachother.They’reoutoforder.

“Idon’tgiveafuckabouttheacquisition.You.Desk.Now.Oryou’regoingtogetaspankingthatyou

won’tforget.”

Irushtohisdeskandbendover.
“Good girl,” he praises. I’m still wearing a shirt and bra. His desk is cold against my cheek. I’m

breathing,waitingforhimtotouchme.

Thenahandisbetweenmythighs.Ijumpwhenhefinallytouchesmethere,rightthere.
“Responsivelittlething,aren’tyou?”
Athickfingerpushesitswayinsideofme.Thenhestops.
“You’reavirgin.”
I’maswetasafountain.
“Yes.”Mywhisperisveryquietinthisoffice.
Hisfingerpullsoutofme.“OhGod,thisisamistake.”
I cringe when I hear him call finger-fucking me a mistake. I can feel tears threaten, so I go to the

cornerwheremyclothesare.Iputonmyskirt,notbotheringwithmythong.Anotherfewsecondsandmy
shoesareon.

“Camilla.Lookatme.”Istareatthegroundandtrynottoletthetearsfall.
Thenhishandisonmychinandhe’sforcingmetolookupathim.
Ican’tstopthetearsfromfallinganymore.

“Camilla,baby.”Heholdsmecloseandrestshischinonthetopofmyhead.“Yourfirsttimebelongs

tosomeoneyoulove,notyourdirtyboss.Notyourdad’sbestfriend,who,bytheway,willslaughterme
ifheeverhearsthatItouchedhisbabydaughter.”

Istiffeninhisarmsandpullaway.“I’mnotalittlegirlanymore.”
Heputsafingerinhismouth,keepingeyecontactwithme.Hesucksitthenpullsitoutwithapop.
“Iknow.”Hesighs.“ButIcan’ttakeyourvirginity.”
Tearsofrageandsexualfrustrationarerunningdownmycheeksnow.
“Well,it’smoot,”Isay,notbotheringtowipethemaway.“Becauseit’smylastdayofworkanyway.”

B A R B A R I A N

LIN C O LN

watchCamillawalkout,thonginherhand,asadslownesstoherwalk,andIfeellikeatotalpiece
ofshit.Inevershouldhavetouchedher,andIdefinitelyshouldn’thavegottenwithinawhisperof

takinghervirginity.ForGod’ssake,Irememberthedayshewasborn.IrememberhersellingmeSamoas
whenshewasaBrownie.Irememberhowproudherfatherwaswhenshegraduatedfromhighschool.

I’dbetrayedhim.Smellingherscentonmyhand,though,maybemadeitworthit.Ilickuptherestof

it.

Ifelthermeltingonmelikewarmhoney.Iknewshewantedit.AndI’dstillsentheraway.
Imustbeafool.Anhonorableone.
I wash my hands, then I’m pulling out my phone. So many contacts. There’s a blonde who doesn’t

expectanythingbesidesadinnerandagoodtime.Abrunettewholovestoarguewithmeandthenhate
fuck me because she says that I’m a corporate pig who needs to be taught a lesson. She normally
“teaches”byrippingmyclothes.Ared-headwholovestossingsalad.

AndallofthempaleincomparisontowhatIjusthadwithCamilla,andwehaven’tevenfuckedyet.
I’mamess.
I’mstillhard.Mydickisabouttopokeaholeinmypants,soIshuffleintomybathroomandclosethe

door.

Inmyimagination,shehasn’tleft.

HERE

SHE

, bent over on my desk. My finger touches her hymen. I don’t say anything, just silently

thankGodthatshe’sgivingmethispreciousgift.

Ikneelbehindher,pullingherthighsapartuntilIcanlickupallherhoney.Sheshiversinfrontof

measIburymyfaceinsideofher,butjustnotdeepenough.Theangleagainstthedeskispushingher
clitagainstthehardedge,andshe’smoaninginfrontofme.Herlegsareshakingbecauseshe’sabout
tocome.

Ithrusttwofingersinsideofhersmallopeningandshe’sshoutingasIpressagainstthatperfect

spotonthefrontwallthatmakeshergowild.Hercomeisonmyhand,fillingtheairwiththescentof
sex.

She’sshakingonmydeskwhenIstandup,mycockreadytogoevenaftershesuckedmeoff.
Iteaseherentrancewiththetip.Shepushesherhipsback,butIstepback.
“Icontrolthepacehere,”Iwarn.“Notyou.Againstthedesk.”
She settles down against the desk. To punish her, I don’t penetrate her with my cock. Instead, a

fingergatherssomeofthemoisturethat’sspreadingtoherthighsandcirclesaroundherbackdoor.

“Doyouwantmetotakeyouranalvirginity,too?”
“Yes.”Thewhisperisalmosttooquiettohear.God,she’ssodirty.Adirtyvirgin.Iloveit.
“I’llhavetoprepareyoufirst,makesurethatIdon’thurtyou.”
“Itrustyou.”Herbodyisonmydesk.Herhandsaretied.Shehasnopowerinthisposition.
Isinkmycockintoherslowly,oneinchatatime.Icanfeelhermusclesalreadyflutteringaround

me.

“Youlikethis?”
Hercrymeansthatshe’sbeyondwords,butthequickclenchingofhermusclesaroundmydicksay

thatshe’llcomesoon.

“Come,”Icommand.“Now.”
Withascream,she’sclenchingmycocktighterthanafist.Ican’tshootwhenshe’sthistight.Ican

seethatherlegmusclesareclenchedup.ShearchesupandIpullherhairsothatherbackcurveslike
aC.

She’spantinghardbeneathme.Iputahandonherthroat,nottochokeher,though.I’mjustfeel

herpulseandeachbreathasshefinishesherorgasm.

ThenmyhandslidestothebaseofherneckandI’mcontrollinghermotionasIslammycockinto

hersmallbody.She’sstillgaspinginfrontofme,butI’mabarbarian.I’mnotpolite,notgentle.I’m
invadingher,claimingherasmyown.

I’mnotwearingacondom.TherealizationsparksmyorgasmasIfillherwithmyseed.Iimagine

whathersmallbodywouldlooklikewithababybump,whatshewouldlooklikewithmybabyinside
ofher.

Iampouringjetafterjetofseedintoherbody,toomuchforittohold.It’salreadyleakingoutonto

herthighs.

CLEAN

MYSELF

AGAIN

.Damn.Sendingherawaylikeagentlemanmighthavebeentherightthingtodo,

butIcouldn’thaveadatewithanyonebutmyhand.WhenIthinkaboutotherwomen,mydickshrivelsup.
ItisCamillaornooneatall.

S T R A W B E R R Y B U B B L E B A T H

C A MILLA

henIgethome,mydadisn’tthere.Mymomdiedwhenshehadme,soitisjustthetwoofusanda
part-timehousekeeperwhothankfullyisn’tworkingtoday.

Iruntomyroomandgotomybathtub.Ineedtowashawayhishandsonmyskin.
Ifillupmytubanddumpinsomestrawberrybubblebath.ThenIstepin.Thesmellisalreadymaking

mehappier.

Istarttowashmyselfoff,rubbinghisscentoffofme,buttouchingmyslickskinremindsmeofhim.

MyeyescloseasIthinkupyetanotherfantasy.

“S

HOW

YOUR

TITS

,”hegrowls.

Iquicklytakeoffmyshirtandbra,dumpingthemonthefloornexttothecouch.I’msprawledout,

legswide,justlikehelikes.Mythongisinhishand.He’ssniffingit.

Then he’s on his feet, coming over to straddle my body on his couch. It’s a tight fit, but he’s

managingit.Hiscockisoutofhispants,buthe’sstillmostlyclothed.

Hehaspre-comedrippingoutofit,andhishandisspreadingitalloverhimselfbeforeheputshis

dickinthecenterofmychest.

“Pushyourtitstogether.”
Myhandsareontheoutsideofmybreasts,pushingthemtogether,creatingasofttunnel.
Hiseyesareclosedashestartstopumphisdickthroughmybreasts.Hismouthishangingopen.

His dick comes very close to my mouth every time he thrusts forward. He’s thrusting in a steady
rhythm.I’mwatchinghisdickcomeclosetomymoutheveryothersecond.

SoIstickoutmytongueandlickhimonanupstroke.
Heroarsasheshootshiscomeonmyface,onmytits,onmyneck,everywhere.
Whenhe’sdone,hekissesmegently.
“You’resoperfectforme,Camilla.Iloveyou.”

I’

CRYING

NOW

.Thebathwaterisgettingcold.Ismelllikestrawberriesandregret.I’msadthatIwant

someone who won’t take my virginity. I don’t think I mean much to him. Kelly lost hers to a boyfriend
when she was sixteen, but I’ve held onto mine. It’s always been a fantasy of mine that I’d lose it to
Lincoln.

Stupidgirl.
Hedoesn’tcareaboutme.Hewantsmetofindsomeonewholovesme,whichmeansthathedefinitely

doesn’t.Theonlytimehe’llevertellmethathelovesmeisinmydaydreams.

My tears are dripping down my cheeks and into the bath water. I pull the plug out of the drain and

watchthesudsslidedownthedrain,justlikeallmyhopesanddreams.

“

C A M P I N G

C A MILLA

ONEYEARAGO

’mgoing to scout that unmarked trail that the volunteers told us about. I’ll be back in three
hours. You two make dinner, okay?” My dad likes alone time, so it’s not a surprise that he’s

disappearingforalittlewhile.Helikestoleavemebymyselfforawhileontheweekends.

Butthistime,I’mnotalone.
“Sure,”Lincolntellshimcheerfully.“We’llmakedinnerbeforeyougetback.”
“Areyousureit’ssafe?Imean,theyjustcutit.Notalotofpeoplehaveuseditlately.”
“It’sfine,”mydadsays.“JustgrillsometroutandI’llbebackbeforeyouknowit.Westillhave

somesweetpotatoesleft.I’llbebackbeforedark.”

Hewalksintotheforest.Icanseehisbackpackgetsmallerandsmallerashegoesdeeperintothe

forest,andthenheturnsandthetreeshidehim.Icanstillhearhimwalking,butthesoundisfading.

AndnowI’malonewithhisbestfriend,alsoknownasmylifelongcrush.WhenIwasfive,Itold

everyoneatmybirthdaypartythatmybirthdaywishwastomarryLincoln,whichmadeeveryonethere
hysterical. Except for his mean fiancée, Marcia. She gave me the stink eye and spent the rest of my
birthdaypartydrinkingalotofwine.Sheonlylastedforaweekafterthat,though.Linkhadn’tever
saidmuchaboutit,otherthanthatshewastotallypsycho.

“I’llgrillthetroutifyoutakecareofthesweetpotatoes.”
“Deal.”
I bend over to hunt through our supplies. It takes me a minute to finally find the bag of sweet

potatoes,whichisalotsmallerthanIthoughtitwouldbe.There’sarollofaluminumfoilnexttoit.
WhenIturnaroundwiththebagofsweetpotatoesandfoilinmyhands,IcanseeLincolnstaringat
me.

“Areyouokay?”
“Yeah.”Heswallows.“Ineedtogetthesaltandpepperfromoursupplies.”
Hekneelsdowntograbtheseasoningforthefish.It’ssimple,butmydadtoldmethatheprefers

freshlycaughtmountaintrouttoanymealfromafancyrestaurant.

That’swhywe’reouthere.It’ssupposedtobemyeighteenthbirthdaycelebration,butreallyit’san

excuseformydadtorunawayfromhislifeasacorporatebigshotandgofishinginthewoods.He’s
constantlysurroundedbypeopleatwork,sohelovestohearthesoundsofnaturewhennobody’snear
him.

Weworkinsilenceforamoment,sidebysidenexttothesmallcampfire.I’mwrappingthesweet

potatoes completely in foil so I can put them at the edges of the campfire. Technically, the sweet

potatoesaresupposedtocookintheashes,butmydadhasneverbeenpatientenoughtowaittodo
themseparately.

“Ithinkthatit’sokaynow.”Lincolnstandsup.Thefishareonaspit,roastingabovethefire.The

smellofcookingfishandburningwoodfillsthelittleclearingwherewehaveourtents.

“Now we wait.” The campfire isn’t that big or that hot, so it’ll slowly cook everything. I tuck a

strandofhairbehindmyear.

“Whatdoyouwanttodowhilewewait?Playcards?”LincolnlooksatmelikeI’mthelittlegirlhe

taughttoplayGoFish.

“I’m going to take a nap.” I smile at him and go into my tent. I open my jeans. I can’t make a

sound,butbeingsoclosetomycrushiskillingme.Idon’treallydate.Nohighschoolboycouldever
comparetoLincoln.

Hisscentmingledwiththesmellofourcampfireturnedmeon.Tobehonest,hisscentwouldturn

meonwithoutthefire.

Iputmyhandonmymostsensitivespotandclosedmyeyes.

“O

YOUR

HANDS

AND

KNEES

.”

Ihesitate.
“I’mnotgoingtoaskyoutwice.”Hisvoiceissoft,butthetonedoesn’tleaveroomforresistance.
I bend over the log that we pulled next to the campfire. I can feel the hard wood under my soft

stomach.Myhandsareinthedirt.

I can feel his hands under me, unbuttoning my pants, unzipping them, and pulling them and my

underweardown.Thewindtouchesmebetweenmythighs,agentlecaressthatmakesmealittlecold.I
shiver.

Hishugehandsettlesononesoftasscheek.
“I’ve been watching this ass swing while we’ve been hiking all day.” Without warning, his hand

comesdowntostrikeme.

Icryout,startledandinalittlepain.Thepainmingleswithpleasureashesoftlystrokesmewhere

hejusthitme.

“Youlikethat.”Afingeristestingme,pushinginsideofme.I’msoakingwet.
Thenhe’sslidingmywetnessuptotraveltomybackdoor.
“Oh!Pleasedon’t!”Iyelp.“Don’ttouchmethere.”
“I’mnotgoingtohurtyou,”hesays,hisvoicelikeblackmagic.“Relax,baby.”
“Okay.”
Itakeadeepbreathandrelaxashisfingerexploresmybackhole.Thenhe’spushingthetipofone

fingerinsideofme.Idon’tknowifIlikeit.ImoanashestimulatesplacesinsideofmethatIdidn’t
evenknowexisted.

A climax hits me like a semi-truck going 20 over the speed limit. No warning, but my body is

soaringfromtheimpact.

OPEN

myeyesandhopeIdidn’tmaketoomuchnoisewhileItouchedmyself.Ihuntformymakeup

removerwipestocleanoffmyhand,whichsmellslikemenow.Iballupthewipeandshoveitintomy
trashbag.IhopemydadneverknowswhatIdid.IfheeverknewthatIfantasizedabouthisbestfriend

puttingafingerupmyass,he’dprobablycheckmeintoaninsaneasylumorsomething.

C O L D W A T E R

LIN C O LN

amillaisinhertenttakinganapwhileherdadisout,whichmeansthatIhaveararemomentto
myself. I take a look at the food that’s cooking. If it turns into a raging bonfire, Camilla will

notice.Orshe’llbeasleepandallofourgearwillgoupinsmoke.

It’sprettysmall,though,andwesheltereditfromthewind.Idon’twaverwhenIpoursomewater

onit.Thefishisdoneanyway,andthesweetpotatoeswillbefineintheashes.

IhadgottenhardwatchingCamillabendover,andmyerectionhadn’tgoneaway.I’mluckythat

herdaddidn’tcomeback,becauseheprobablywould’veslaughteredmeandleftmybodyforthebears
if he understood how I felt about his daughter. A daughter who was growing more beautiful and
womanlybytheday.IfIdidn’twanttospontaneouslycombust,I’dneedtotakecareofsomethings.

There is a mountain stream just two minutes from camp. If Camilla needs me, I am within

screamingdistance.

WhenI’mrightnexttothestream,Istrip.Itisn’tdeep,butitiscold.Icemeltisneverthatnice.I

trytopouricewaterovermydick,butitrefusestogodown.LookslikeIhaveadatewithmyhand.

’

PAST

MIDNIGHT

,andmybuddyissleepingoffalltheJackthatwedrank.I’mwideawake,andthe

alcoholhaswipedawaymyscruples.He’ssnoringawayinourtent,soIunziptheopeningandgoout
to Camilla’s tent. I unzip it as quietly as I can. I can see just a little slow, steady movement in the
scantymoonlightthattellsmethatshe’sbreathingdeeply,sleepinglikeanangel.

Ilaydownontopofhersleepingbag.Iputahandoverhermouthandleanin.Iwhisperinher

ear.“Camilla,wakeup.”

Hereyesarebarelyopen.She’ssayingsomethingmuffledbymyhand.
“Camilla, you have to be quiet.” I thrust my erection at her. Even through the sleeping bag, she

canfeelit.Shestills.

“Camilla,I’mgoingtoletgo.Ifyoudon’twantthis,tellmenow.Otherwise,stayquiet.”
Itakemyhandaway.AllIcanhearisthehootingofanowl.Herbreathsarecomingfasterand

faster.

Ihavemyanswer.Ipullaparthersleepingbag,yankingdownherpajamapantsandunderwear.I

pullherlegsovermyshoulderssoIcanpiledriveher.Ifwehadprivacy,I’dtakemytime.Herfather,
mybestfriend,issleepingonlyfeetaway.Tentwallsaren’tmuchofabarrier.

Onehandgoesbetweenherlegs.She’swetenoughformetotakerightnow,butIrubherforafew

minutesanyway.Icantellfromherheavybreathingthatshe’stryingveryhardnottomakeanynoise.
Neitherofuswantstogetbusted.

I stop rubbing her and guide my dick inside of her tight pussy. She’s incredibly warm on a cool

nightlikethis.IfeellikeI’msinkingintoasauna.

Ihearherpantingveryquietly.Ithrustalltheway,andIhearamuffledgasp.ThenIcan’thold

myselfbackanylongerandbegintoswingmyhipsasquietlyasIcan,gettingasdeepasIcan.Her
musclesarecontractingaroundme,fluttering,asIholdbackmyowngroanofcompletion.She’sfilled
with my come. I want her to keep it, but I know that there’d be hell to pay if she smelled like me
tomorrowmorning.

Ifumbleinthecornerforthosewetwipesthatshebroughtwithher,theonesthatwe’vebeenusing

towipeourhandsbeforeeating.Icleanherbetweenherthighsbeforewipingmyselfoff.Ithrowthe
wipeintothegarbagebagshekeepsinhertent.

“Don’ttellanyone.”She’sstillhalf-nakedundermeandmydickwantsheragain,butwe’vetaken

enoughrisksfortonight.

Idisengageherlegsfrommyshoulders,thenIleandowntokissher,slowandsoft.Shekissesme

backtimidlyatfirst,thenshepusheshertongueinsideofmymouth.

Andshe’snotaninnocentlittlegirlanymore.Yeah,she’seighteen,butshe’sawoman.

HEN

OPEN

EYES

, I’m standing in a cold mountain stream that’s carried away my come. I shake

myselfoffandputonmyclothes,eventhoughI’mstillalittlewet.Iwalkbacktocamp.

It’s so damned inconvenient to want my best friend’s little girl. Maybe it’s just the prolonged

exposure,havingtobeinclosequartersallthetime.Iwonderifanyofthewomeninmylittleblack
bookwouldmindbeingcalledCamillawhilewefuck.

D R E S S H U N T

C A MILLA

NOW

rinseoff,thenIfindmyrattypajamas.They’rereallyoldbutthemostcomfortableclothingthatI
own.They’repink,butsortofagrayishpinkafterallthistime.Ishould’vethrownthemawayyears

ago,buttheymakemefeelsafe.

I tuck myself into bed with my Kindle, arranging my pillows so I’m in a cozy nest. Then I hear the

garagedooropen.Mydadishome.

“Whereareyou,Sunshine?”
Igetoutofbedandgotothemezzanine.“Here,Dad.”
“Haveyoueatenyet?”
“No.I’mnotveryhungry.”
“I thought that we’d celebrate your last day of working. It’ll be good for us to spend time together

beforeyouhavetogobacktoschool.Imadeareservationforsevenatyourfavoriteplace,thatItalian
restaurant.IinvitedLincoln.”

Oh,shit.
Heseesmyface.“Somethingwrong,Sunshine?”
“Nope.”Ishakemyhead.“I’lljustgetchangedandwecanheadout.”
I go into my room and throw open my closet. What’s appropriate for a celebratory dinner with my

fatherandhisbestfriend,theonewhoalmostfuckedmetodaybutstoppedbecauseIamavirgin?

Ihateeverythinginmycloset.TheperiwinklebluedressmakesmelooklikeI’m12.Ihavearoyal

bluedresswithprettyembroidery,butthenecklineistoohigh.It’shard,becauseIneedanecklinelow
enoughtotantalizeLincolnbuthighenoughtopassmydad’sscrutiny.

I have a black dress with white stripes that I discard because they make me look wide. There’s a

dresscoveredinflowersthatmakesmelooklikealittlegirl.

I don’t have anything to wear. I growl at my closet and wonder how angry my dad would be if I

insistedongoingtothemalltobuyanewdressfortonightwhenourreservationissosoon.

Idigdeeperintomycloset.ThenIseeit.
Theperfectdressissittingthere.IboughtitonadarefromKelly.Shesaidthatmyclothesweretoo

boring.

Itsortofremindsmeofaflamencodancer’scostume,butthereisadaringslitupthesidethatreveals

alittlelegwhenIwalked.Tantalizingwithoutactuallyshowinganything.

Ichoosehigh-heeledanklebootsunderthedress.Ineedthree-inchheelsbecausetheskirtissolong.
I put on a very small amount of makeup. My dad knows that I didn’t wear much, so it would look

weird if I showed up looking like a circus clown. I just put a little eyeliner on to emphasize my eyes,
whicheveryonealwaystellsmearebeautiful.Ilookatmysingletubeofredlipstickbutleaveitalone.
It’dbegoneinahalfminutewhenwestartedeatingevenifIdidputiton.

I go downstairs in my ankle boots and pretty dress that looked demure until I walked. My dad is

staringathisphone.

“Ready,Sunshine?”
“Ready,Dad.”
Wewalkintothegarage.IslideintothepassengerseatofhisLexus.Thenwe’reroaringoutintothe

city.

U N D E R T H E T A B L E

LIN C O LN

’msitting at our table already when they arrive. He’s wearing the suit he probably wore to work
today.She’swearingastunningdress.

Everything’scovered,butwhenshewalks,Icanseeaflashofleg.Ifindherlegsveryarousing.Fuck,

Ifindeverybitofherarousing.

“Hopeyouhaven’tbeenwaitinglong.”
“Nah,”Isay,takingasipofmywine.Ineedittogetthroughthisdinner.It’dbetooweirdformeto

turnitdown,especiallysinceheknowsthatI’mnotseeinganyonerightnow.

Theysitdownacrossthetablefromme.Camillaisdirectlyinfrontofme.Awaiterbustlesover.
“WhatcanIgetforyou,sir?Miss?”
“Aglassofyourhouseredformeandsomeorangejuiceforher.”
“Rightaway,sir.”
“Sohowwasyourday?Busy?You’regettingyoursecretaryAmandaback,sothat’sgood.”
“Yeah.”Itakeanothersipofwine.“It’sgood.”
I don’t know why, but the restaurant’s lighting is making Camilla’s face even more beautiful than

usual. It is highlighting her smooth cheekbones and full lips. She looks like an ancient queen of a
civilizationlonggone.Shemightbeateenager,butshelookslikeawoman.

“Are you glad to be going back to school, Camilla?” I ask politely. It would be weird if we didn’t

speakatthisdinnerforthethreeofus.

“I’mveryglad.”Shesmileswithjusthermouth.Hereyesareangryandcold,butIdon’tthinkthather

dadhasnoticed.“Can’twaittogetbackintotheswingofcollegelife.”

“Thosewerethedays,huh?”Mybuddynudgesme.“Wildgirls,crazyparties,stayingoutpastdawn.

Can’tkeepupwithallthatanymore.You’renotdrinkingofcourse,Sunshine,right?”

“Iwouldn’ttellyouifIdiddrink,Dad.”Sherollshereyesathim,buthejustlaughs.
“Youshouldkeepsomesecretsfromyouroldman.Justdon’tturnupunmarriedandpregnantonmy

doorsteponedayandI’llbelievethatIraisedyouright.”

Herfaceisgettingalittlepink.“Idon’t…”
“Iknowyou’reagoodkid,Sunshine.I’mjustteasingyou.”Heturnstome.“Iwasblessedwithan

incredible kid. Too bad you don’t have one of your own, you know. I thought that you’d be married by
now,butyou’veenjoyedthebachelorlife.Youcansowyourwildoatswhereveryoulike.”

Atthementionofwildoats,Ifeelagentlebrushagainstmycock.IthinkthatI’mimaginingituntilI

seeCamilla’seyes.They’refieryandangry.

Thetouchcomesagain,firmerthistime.Thelittleminxisslidingherfootupanddownmydick.She’s

tryingtogetmebackforturningherdown.Mycockdoesnotcare.It’srockhardandreadytogo.Ican
alreadyfeelalittlepre-comeoozingoutofthetip.

Itrytowarnhertostopwithmyeyes,butshe’signoringit.
Igrunt.
“Youokay,Link?”
“Thatwasmystomach,”Ilie.“I’mhungry.”
“Food will be here soon enough. What do you think about the weather lately?” He launches into a

monologuethatIcan’tkeeptrackofbecauseI’mbreakingoutinasweat.I’mabouttocomeunderthis
tablefromherlittlefootrubbingupagainstme.Ican’tmovebecauseit’lllookweird.Ican’truntothe
bathroom, because then everyone will see my erection proudly displayed. I grit my teeth and close my
eyesasIfeelmyselfreleaseinmypantslikeateenageboy.

I open my eyes to see victory shining in her eyes. I know that she’s mad, but I didn’t expect her

revengetobeafootjobduringdinnerwithherfather.She’sdiabolical.Ineedtocleanup.Mycockis
softeningnow.

“Excuseme,”Imutter,andherfatherdoesn’tstopforasecond.“I’mgoingtohitthebathroom.”

F O L L O W I N G

C A MILLA

justdidsomethingbad,andI’mplanningonfollowingitupwithsomethingworse.

MydadmusthavehadaglassorthreewhileIwaschanging,becausehe’scheerfullytalkingto

twoladieswhoaresittingatthetablenexttoours.Hisvoiceisalittleloud.

“I’mgoingtothebathroom.”
Mydaddoesn’tskipabeat,justgoesrightontalkingabouttheweatherandclimatechange.Idon’t

knowifheevenneedsanaudience.

Igotothebackhallwaywheretherestroomsare.Ipasssomeguywhoisstillzippinguphispants.

Thedoortotheguys’restroomisclosingveryslowly.There’sonlyonestallandnobodyattheurinals.If
Linkisinthere,he’sinthestall.Ihopenoguysneedtousetherestroomforthenexttenminutes,becauseI
goinside,shovethedoorshutdespitesomeresistance,andlockit.

“Link,”Iwhisper.
“Camilla.”Thedoorofthestallswingsopen.Hestickshisheadout.“Getoutofthemen’sbathroom.”
Insteadofobeying,Ipushthestalldooropen.Hehashiserectioninhishand.Hewashidingitbehind

thedoor.

“Areyouclose?”Icanseealittlepearlyliquidatthetip.
Ikneelonthetilefloor,ignoringthefactthatmydressisdefinitelygettingdirty.
“Camilla,youcan’tbeinhere.”
WhenIpullhisdickintomymouth,though,heshutsup.
“Mmm.”Hetastesnice.IsuckhimlikeIhaven’teatenallday.
“Camilla,we’regoingtogetcaught.”
Idon’tdignifythatwitharesponse.I’mplayingwithhisballsnow,suckinghimdeepintomymouth.
Thenhe’sspurtingseedstraightintomymouth.Idrainhimdry,suckingevenwhenIthinkeverything

isgone.

“JesusChrist,Camilla.”
Istandup,wipingmymouthwiththebackofmyhand.
“Don’tsendmeawayagain,”Iwarnhim.“Youwon’tliketheconsequences.”
Suddenly,myfeetarenolongerontheground.Hehasmepinnedupagainstthewall,mylegsaround

hiswaist.

“Don’tthreatenme,Camilla.”Thesmallthreadofmenaceinhisvoiceturnsmeon.
Hehasmepushedupagainstthewall,hishandgoingtotheslitinmyfullskirtandgoingstraightfor

myhoneypot.Hisfingersgodirectlyin.

“Iknewit.Iknewyouwerealreadywetforme.”
AllIcansayisasmallwordlessmoanashecirclesmyclitwithsomeofmywetness.
“You’rereadytogoofflikealittlerocket,aren’tyou?”

Hedoessomethingwithhisfingersthatmakesmyeyesrollbackinmyhead.WhenIcanthinkagain,

heslowlylowersmeuntilI’monmyfeetagain.

“I’m going to give you what you’ve been asking for.” His hand settles on the top curve of my ass.

“Andyou’regoingtolikeit.”

“Whataboutmydad?”
“We’llfigureitout.”Amuscleticksinhisjaw.“He’sgoingtohearaboutitsometime.”
Webothwashourhandsinthesink.Someoneisbangingonthedoor.
“Hey!Ihavetousethetoilet.”
Linkunlocksthedoorandshieldsmefromtheguyoutside,whoistryingtogetagoodlookatme.

M I S T A K E N

C A MILLA

inkandImakeourwaybacktothetable.It’stotallynormalforustogotothebathroomatthesame
time.

“What,didyoutwoguzzleafewgallonsofwateratworkatthesametime?”Mydad’sfaceshows

thathe’sprettydrunk.Theladiesatthetablenexttousaregiggling.

“Somethinglikethat,”Linksayssmoothly.Whileweweregone,theycametoservethesaladcourse.

It’sjustahousesalad,butIfeelalittlehungryaftertheclimaxthatIhadinthebathroom.Istarttoattack
thetomatoesandavocadosontop.I’mnotafanoflettuce—it’sjustcrunchywater—butthedressingis
prettygood,andtherearelittlebaconbitsinthesalad,whichIammorethanhappytoeat.Thesaltiness
remindsmeofthetasteofLink’scome,whichmakesmeblushandlookupathim.

He’sdippingafingerintothelittlecupthatholdsextradressing.Hesucksitoffofafingerthatwas

insideofme.Oureyesarelockedtogether.

“Whatthefuck?”
My dad is looking at the two of us. “What the fuck was that?” He gets to his feet, but he’s a little

unsteady.“Areyouflirtingwithmydaughter,youasshole?”

“Dad,quietdown.Don’tmakeascene.”Ilookaround.Thegigglyladiesaren’tgigglinganymore.
“I’llfuckingmakeasceneifyoucomebackfromthebathroomatthesametimeandhe’ssuckingstuff

offofhisfinger.Iwasn’tbornyesterday.”

Justthen,theguywhowaspoundingonthedooroftherestroomcomesbyourtable.
“There’stheprostitutewhowasfuckingyouinthebathroom.”Hehiccups.He’sclearlyalittledrunk.

“Iseethatyouhavetwoclientstonight,butgivemeaphonenumberorname…I’dliketohireyou.You’re
expensivebutworthit,iftheexpressiononthatguy’sfaceisanythingtogoby.”

“Getthefuckawayfromher.”Link’svoiceiscold.
“Just offering her a business opportunity.” The drunk guy is holding his hands open in front of him.

“Noneedtogetsotouchyaboutawomanthatyourentbythehour.

MydadpointsafingeratLink.“Let’stakethisoutside.”Hesoundsfrighteninglysoberrightnow.
Link,agentleman,takesthenapkinoffofhislapandplacesitonthetable.
“I’mready.”He’stakingoffhissuitjacket.Mydaddoes,too.
“Wait.No.Stop.Dad,Ididn’thavesexwithLinkinthebathroom.”
“Don’tlietome,Camilla.”
“Ididn’t!”Theringoftruthmustsnaphimoutofhisanger.
“Youdidn’t?”
“No.”ButI’mblushing.
“Youweredoingsomethinginthebathroom.”Hisvoiceissogrim.“You’resoyoung.Youdon’tknow

better.Linkdoes.Heknowsthatheshouldn’ttakeadvantageofayounggirl.Stayhere.”

AndIwatchhelplesslywhilethetwoofthemquicklywalkoutoftherestaurant.Ilookattheirempty

chairsandthediscardedsuitjacketsonthebacksofthem.

Thewaitercomesbywithourmaincourses.
“Wheredidtheygo,miss?”
“Justoutsideforamoment,”Isay,eventhougheveryoneisstaringatourtable.Ourwaiterknowsthat

he’smissedsomething,buthejustcarefullyclearsspaceforthenewplates.Igivehimoursaladbowls.

I cut my eggplant parmesan, but it tastes sawdust. It’s my favorite dish here, but I can’t seem to

swallow.Iputdownmyutensils.Icanhearthesoundofshoutingoutside.Iholdbackmytears,because
I’mwearingeyelinerandIknowpeoplearestilllookingatmeandtheemptyseatsatthistable.

Thisdinneristheoppositeofacelebration.

“

F I G H T

LIN K

’mgoingtofuckyouupfortouchingmylittlegirl.Damnyou,Link.You’vebetrayedme.Itrusted
youwithher.I’veleftyoualonewithher.”

“We’veneverfucked.”
Withacry,he’srunningatme.He’sdrunkerthanIam,though,sohe’salittleunsteadyonhisfeet.As

soonashecomesbyme,Ismoothlypivotoutofhiswaylikeatorerofacinganinfuriatedbull.

“Itoldhertoworkforyou.Isthatwhenithappened?Isthatwhenyoustartedmolestingmydaughter?”
“It’s not like that,” I protest, even though he’s trying to go for my throat now. Then his fist comes

perilouslyclosetomynoseasIdodge.“Ididn’ttouchherwhileshewasworkingforme.Iswear.”

“Butyouadmitthatyoutouchedmyteenagedaughter,don’tyou?”
I’mprettysurehe’stryingtokickmeintheface,buthedoesn’thavetheflexibilitytodoit,sothetip

ofhisshoecatchesmyribsinstead.Iusetheopeningtocatchhisankleandpullhislegsfromunderhim.
Hisbalanceisn’tthatgreatrightnow,anyway.

Irollhimontohisfrontandsitonhim,pinninghiminasimplehold.
“Listentome,”Isay.“Ididn’tmeantodoanythingwithyourdaughter.I’veresistedit.I’veknownthat

youwouldn’tlikeit.”

“Damn right,” he spits like he’s tasted something foul. “I’ve been right there with you as you’ve

fuckeddozensifnothundredsofwomen.Hell,Idon’tknowifyouhavesyphilisorsomething.Younever
gotmarried.”

“Igetregularcheck-upsforSTDs.”
Hestrugglesbeneathme,butI’mprettyfuckingheavy.
“Youasshole,”hehisses.“Mydaughter’savirginandyou’rethefurthestthingfromit.”
Iknewhe’dbeoutraged.Iexpectedit.Butthatcommenthitshome,becauseIbelievethesamething:

sheshouldhavesexforthefirsttimewithsomeboywhoismadlyinlovewithher,notsomejadedadult
whospendstoomuchtimeinhisoffice.

Istandupandrollhimtohisfront,yankinghimtohisfeet.Heputsahandonmyshouldertosteady

himself.

“Leave.Now.Andmaybethenyou’llstillhaveafewteeth.”
Ilookhimintheface.Idon’twanttomakethissituationanyworsethanitalreadyis.
“I’llleavefornow.”
Hejustshakeshisheadandgoesbackintotherestaurant.IthinkaboutCamilla.Myphoneisinmy

suitjacketpocket,soIcan’ttextherbeforeIgo.Mycarkeysareinmypants.Ineedtogetoutofhere
beforeJackchangeshismindandattacksmeagain.TheonlyreasonIdidn’treallyfightbackwasbecause
Iknewitwouldhurther.Hemightbemybestfriend,butevenhedoesn’tgetafreepass.

Itossmykeysintheairandcatchthem.I’llcomebackforherlater.

T O - G O

C A MILLA

ydadwalksbackintotherestaurant.Hishairisamess.Linkisn’twithhim.

“Whathappenedoutthere?”

Mydadlooksatmewithtired,frustratedeyes.“Thisisn’tabouthim.Whendidyoustartsomething

withLink?”

Ihesitate.Idon’tknowwhattotellhim.
“Didithaveanythingtodowithyouworkingforhimthissummer?”
“Yes.”Iknowthatitdoes.IfIhadn’tbeenfacedwithdailytemptation,Imightnothaveeveractedon

mychildhoodcrush.

Mydadswearsandbreaksawineglass.Thesoundmakeseverybodylookatus.Awaitercomesto

clearitaway.

“I’llpayforit.Justputitonmytab.”MydadslideshiswalletoutandputsaCenturioncardinthe

waiter’sfreehand.Thewaiterputsitintohispocketasheclearsawaytherestofthebrokenglass.

“Howlong?”
“Notvery,Dad.”
“Howlong?”herepeats.
“We haven’t…had sex.” I can feel my cheeks heating up, because I haven’t even had the birds and

bees talk with my dad, and here I am, talking about whether or not I’ve had sex with his best friend. I
squirminmyseat.ThisisliterallythemostuncomfortableI’vebeeninmyentirelife.Iwanttogetupand
runouttotheparkinglot,stealthecar,andjustgohome.

“Nothing?Youhaven’tdoneanything?”
The uncomfortable silence sits heavily between us. I could lie, but he would know. So I don’t say

anything.

“Youhave.SweetJesus,”mydadgroans.
Istareatmynearlyfullplate.Theeggplantlookssadandwilted.
“I’mgoingtoaskthemtoboxallofthisup.There’snopointinbeinghereanymore.”Heflagsdowna

waiter.“Boxes,please.”

Idon’twanttocry,butI’mprettyclosetoit.I’mupsetbecausethiswassupposedtobeanicedinner.

AndifIhadn’tgivenLinkafootjobunderthetableandchasedhimtothebathroom,wewouldprobably
beeatinganicemeal.

Nowhisjacketishere,butheisnowheretobeseen.IwishthatIjustkeptmyfoottomyself.
Awaiterclearsourdishes.Twominuteslater,allthefoodisinto-gocontainers.Mydadisshrugging

intohisjacket.BothofuslookatLink’sjacket.

“I want to burn it,” my dad says. He sighs. “But that would make our tailor mad.” He picks it up,

puttingitoverhisarm.“Let’sgohome.”

Thecarridehomeisdeadsilent.We’vesaidwhatweneedtosay.Heknowsaboutmyscandalous

loveaffairthatneverwas.Iknowthathe’supsetaboutit.

Istareoutmywindow.Thenwe’reparkinginourgarage.
“Sweetie.”
“Dad.”
Hesqueezesmyhand.“I’mreallydisappointedinyou.”
I’mcrushed.ThisiswayworsethanmydadgettingangryandfightingLink.
“ButIloveyou.”Hesighsashereleasesmyhand.
“Thanks,Dad.”
“Andyou’regoingawaytoschooltomorrow,soyou’llbefarawayfromhiscorruptinginfluence.”
Idon’tsayanything.Idon’tgotoschoolonthemoon.
“Stayawayfromhim,okay?AndthenIcanforgiveyou.”
“I’mnotgoingtopromisethat.”
Mydad’slefthand,theonethatisstillonthesteeringwheel,tightens.
“Youcan’tseehim.He’smyage,notyours.”
“Wehaven’tevengottenstarted,”Iprotest.
“AndifIhaveanythingtosayaboutit,youneverwill.Dateboysyourownage.”
“Idon’twantto!”Ifeellikeastupidteenager,butI’manadultnow.“IwantLink.”
“Youcan’thavehim,”mydadroars.“OrI’llcutyouoff.”
Beingcutoffisoneofmyworstfears.Iknowhowharditistokeepajobandstudy.Mostpeople

whoworkandstudydotheminimumtobeconsideredafull-timestudent.Incontrast,Itaketwicethefull-
timeload.

Icallhisbluff.“Thencutmeoff.”
Hepullsouthisphone.Heopensabankingappandfreezesmycreditcardaslost.
“I’lldotherestonMonday.”
We’reatastandstill.Hecan’tdictatewhereIgoandwhoIsee,buthecantakeawayallofmymoney.

Mytuition,room,andboardhavealreadybeenpaidforduringthissemester,butI’mgoingtohavetogeta
job.

“Thanksalot,Dad.”Ican’tstopahintofbitternessinmyvoice.IslamthecardoorasIgetoutand

headtomyroom.I’mcatchingaridewithKellytomorrow,soIhavetobepackedbeforeIgobackto
school.

I’mmostlypacked,butIshoveabunchofstuffintomybackpack.Ilookatmyphone.IsendLinka

text,“Hey.”

And he doesn’t respond. I guess silence is my answer. Now that my dad knows, Link doesn’t want

anythingtodowithme.

G O I N G A W A Y

C A MILLA

textKellytopickmeupearlierthanusual.Shehasn’tevengonetosleepyet,sinceit’searlyinthe
day.Ileavethehousebeforemydadwakesup.Ileavehimanote.

SeeyouatThanksgiving.
Nocutesignoffs.Ilovemydadalot,butwe’regoingtohavetofigurethisout.I’mprettyupset,and

soishe.Itsoundslikehe’sputtingmostoftheblameatLink’sdoor,though.

Kellyisattheendofmydriveway.Isomehowmanagetobringmysuitcasesoutwithoutmakingaton

ofnoise.WhenIgobackformylastsuitcase,Iseethecurtaininmydad’sroommoving.

MyheartfeelsheavyasIrollthelastsuitcaseout.MydadandIhavealwaysbeenateam.Thiswhole

thingwithLinkisthefirsttimethatwe’vehadaseriousdisagreement.

“Youreadytogo,babe?”
“Yeah,Kels.”
She’s chewing gum. I load her car, then I get into her passenger seat. We go roaring off to school.

We’reroommatesinasuite.Eventhoughherparentsareonlycoveringpartofcollegecourses,shemakes
uptheextrawithapart-timejobasabarista.

IcryalittleasIleavemyhouse.AtleastI’llbefarawayfromallofthis.
KellyknowsthatI’msad.SheturnsonDisneyRadiotocheermeup,eventhoughshesortofhatesit.

ShecallsittheKidsBopchannel,becauseIliketosingDisneytunes.

It works just a little bit. It stops me from crying. And she doesn’t even protest when I sing along.

That’swhyshe’smybestfriend.

An hour later, we’re at school. She drives into our designated parking spot. We unload and sort of

shuffle everything into the elevator, although I stay on the lower level with the extra bags while Kelly
goesuptounlockourdoorandputinthefirstloadofsuitcases.

Shecomesbackdown.Istepintotheelevatorwiththerestoftheluggage.
Theendofmysummerseemslikeabaddreamnow,likeithappenedtosomeoneelse.
Whenweopenourfrontdoor,Kellysays,“Youshouldcomeoutwithmetonight.”
She’s much more of a party girl than I am. I don’t usually party with her, but I find myself saying,

“Yeah,I’dlikethat.”

“I’llchooseyouroutfitanddoyourhairandmakeup.Youneedtocheerup.We’llstartatsix.”
“Okay.”
I push past her and go into my room. I don’t want to cry, but I curl up in a ball and stare out my

window.

Linkhasn’trespondedtomytext,evenadaylater.Idon’tknowwhatelsetodo.Weneverhadasex,

andIknowthatmydadwouldhavegoneabsolutelyballisticifLinkhadletmefuckhim.

I feel like there’s an aching hole in the center of my chest, the hole where Link’s love should be. I

hopethatthepartytonightcheersmeup.MaybeI’llmeetsomeonehot.

Thinkingofhookingupwithsomeonejustmakesmeevensadder.Iwishhewouldrespondtomytext.

P A R T Y

C A MILLA

wakeupwhenKellyknocksonmydoor.“Timetogetready,babe.”Sheswingsitopenandseesme
curledinthefetalposition.

“Babe,it’sgoingtobeokay.”
“Itdoesn’tfeellikeit.”
“Letmedoyourhairandmakeup.You’llfeellikeanewwoman.”Shehasadressonahanger.“And

you’rewearingthistonight.”

It’sascandalouslyshortreddresswithadeepneckline.
“That’snotadress.That’sanembarrassedtowel.”
“You’rewearingittonight.”
Idon’thavetheenergytoarguewithher.Shedoessomekindofcomplicatedtwistthingwithmyhair,

sprayinghairsprayeverywhere.

“Lookup.”Shedoesmyeyelinerandtherestofmyface,occasionallygivingmecommandswhenI

needtoraiseorlowermychin.Sheworkedinadepartmentstoresellingmakeupforawhile.

“Lookinthemirror.”
IlooktheprettiestI’veeverbeen,butI’mdepressedbecauseLinkwillneverseethis.
“Youcanhaveaflingtonight.Oneoftheboysisgoingtowanttotakeyouhome.Andyouwon’tbeso

sad.”

“Okay,”Isay,eventhoughIstilldon’tknowifI’mupforit.
ButKellytakes15minutestoputtogetherherlook.She’swearingaveryshortskirtandhaltertop,

bothofthemprettyshadesofpink.She’swearingsky-highheels.Ihaveonapairofkittenheels,because
ifI’mdrinking,Idon’twanttofallover.

Wetaketheelevatordown,thenwe’reinacarheadingforfratrow.Iwishthatshewouldjustletme

buysomechocolategelatoandwatchsadmovies.

But it’s party time. It’s not that far away. The party is already in full swing. I can hear the bass out

here.Therearesomeguyssmokingoutfront.

Wegointhefrontdoor,andKellyseessomeguywhosheknowswellenoughtohug.
Andthenhistongueisinhermouth,whichismycuetoleave.Iwaver,sincewe’rerightatthefront

door.Iwanttogohome,butshehasthekeys.Idecidetocatchataxi.Shecanhavefun,butI’mtoosadto
begoodcompanyforanybody.

Islipoutthefrontdoor.Theguyssmokingoutthereareheadingin,soIwaituntiltheyfilepastme.
Thelastoneinlinesays,“Whyareyousad?”
Justthatquestionisenoughtomakemefeelalittleteary.
“Ijustneedtogohome,that’sall.”
“Comeonoutside.I’mapsychmajor,soI’maprettygoodlistener.”

IturnandlookatKelly,whoisstraddlingthatguyinacorner.They’rehumpingeachother,butthey

arefarfromtheonlycouplewhoisgettingdownanddirtyrightnow.

“Okay.”I’mplanningoncallinganUber,butIcanwaituntilItalkitoutforawhile.MyUberdriver

willprobablygivemeabadstarratingifIstartblubberinginhisbackseat.

Wesitdownonthefrontsteps.
“What’sgoingon,hon?”
“Ijust…IgotinvolvedwithsomeoneIshouldn’thave.”
“Aprofessor?”
Myheadwhipsaround.“No,nothinglikethat.”
“ATA?”
“Nah.It’ssomeoneelse.”
“Yourpriest?”
“What?No!”
“Whoisit?”
ThedarknessoutsidemakesmefeellikeIcantellthisstrangerwhat’sgoingon.Icanconfessmysins

inthedark.Iwon’tseehimagain,anyway.

“It’smydad’sbestfriend.”
Hewhistles.“That’sprettybad.”
“Iknow.”ButIstraightenupandliftmychin.“I’llfigureitout.”
“Howdoesyourdadfeelaboutit?”
“Hehatesit.Hecutmeoff,sonowIhavetofindajob.”
“Isthattheworstthingintheworld?”
“No.Butmylastonewasfor…him…andnowIhavetolisthimasareference.”
“That’scomplicated.”
“I know.” I feel a lot better just after talking, though. “You’re a really good listener. I think you’ll

makeagoodtherapist.”

“It’seasytolistentoaprettygirllikeyou.”Hesmilesatme.
“Getthefuckawayfromher.”
BothofusturnandlookatLink,whoisstandingnexttous.Iwassoabsorbedintellingmysadstory

thatIdidn’tnoticethatLinkhadtrackedmehere.

“Link?Whatareyoudoinghere?”
“Thisismycuetogobackinside.”Heleavesthetwoofusaloneonthefrontlawn,butthehouseis

fullofpeoplewhocanseeusthroughthefrontwindow.

“You’remine,”Linksays.
“Butyoudidn’treplytomytext.”
“Myphonewasinmysuitjacket,theonethatIleftbehind.It’sstillatyourhouse.Ialreadycalledthe

restaurant,buttheytoldmethatyourfatherhadtakenit.”

Myheartsoars.“Soyouweren’tignoringme?”
“Hellno.”Hewalksforwardandyanksmeintohisarms,bridalstyle,andwhisksmeofftohiscar.

Heplunksmedowninthepassengerseat,fasteningmyseatbeltbeforegettingintothedriver’sseatand
drivingawayfromtheparty.Weleavebehindtheloudmusic,eventhoughIcanhearitablockaway.

“Letmetellyouhowit’sgoingtobe.You’regoingtolivewithmeandcommutetoschool.You’renot

working.Icanpayforwhateveryouneed.We’regettingmarried.”

“What?We’venevereven…howdoyouknowthatwe’recompatible.”
“Icouldshowyourightnowinmycar,butI’mgoingtowaituntilwegetbacktoyourapartment.Your

roommateishere,right?”

“Yeah.She’sprobablygoingtostayhereandcomebackinthemorning.”

“Good.ThenIcantakeitslowwithyou.”

F I R S T T I M E

LIN K

parkinoneofthevisitorspotsatherapartmentbuilding.Thenwe’rewalkingintoherplace.She
swipesacardthatshetuckedintoherbra.Andthenwe’reintheelevator.Iholdherclose.

“I’mgoingtotieyoutoyourbedandfuckyouuntilyoucan’trememberyourname.”I’vereadallof

heremailstoherbestfriend.Iknowthatshe’sintoalittlebondage,andsoamI.

Theelevatorchimeswhenwegettoherfloor.Shepullsakeyoutofherbra.
“Whatelseisthere?Akitchensink?”
“Myphone.”
Sheunlocksherfrontdoor.Ifollowherinside.
ThenI’mpeelingbackpartofherdresstorevealthebracupwhereshestashedherphone.Shehas

suchfullbreaststhatitbarelyhasmadealump.Ipullherbraoff,andthenI’mtearingherdressapart.

“It’sKelly’sdress!”
“I’llmakeupforitlater.Icanfinanceashoppingspree.Butlater.”Bendingherovermyarm,Ikissa

trailfromherneckdowntohercleavage.Herhandsareonmyback.

ThenIpullherintomyarmsandgointoherbedroom,theonewithCAMILLAinbiglettersonthe

front.

“Takeoffyourunderwear.”
I’mgettingoutofmyclothesasfastasIcan.IthinkthatI’msettingaworldrecord.
Sheslidesoffherunderwear.Icanseethatthey’redamp.
“YoulikeitwhenIstealyouawaysoIcanmakeyoumine?”
Shenods.
“You’resosweet.”
Itakeherruineddressandtieherhandstotheheadboardwithit.Icanseethathernipplesarehard.

Whenshe’ssecurelytiedtotheheadboard,Itellher,“I’mgoingtotakemytimewithyou.”

Istartoffbyworshipinghersoftbreasts,takingthenipplesintomymouthandsucking.
“Ahh,”shemoans.
Myhandgetsinvolved,rubbingattheapexofherthighs.She’salreadywetenoughtodripontothe

sheets.Mythumbrubsher.Herhipsarejerkingupward.

“Youlikeitlikethis,tiedupandatmymercy.”It’snotaquestion,justastatement.Shenodsanyway.
Islidedownthebedtopeelherthighsapart.
“I’mgoingtoeatyourpussyuntilyou’vecomethreetimes.AndthenmaybeI’llletyouhavemydick.

Youwantit?”

“Idon’twanttowait.”Herhipsareimpatientlymoving.
“I’mincontrolhere,sweetheart.”
Ipullherthighsapartandgettowork.She’ssosweetandwet.IdrinkdowneverydropIcanfind.I

holdherhipsinplacewhileItakeherovertheedgethreetimes.She’stryingtohumpmyface,butIdon’t
lether,justkeepherrightthereasmytonguetastesher.

AfterIfeelhershudderforthethirdtime,Isay,“Ikeepmypromises.”
Igetoffthebed.
“Whatareyoudoing?”
“Gettingacondom.”
“Don’t.Comeinsideme.Iwantyou,notapieceofplastic.”
“Sweetheart,youdon’tknowwhatyou’resaying.You’renineteen.Youhaveyourwholelifeaheadof

you.”

“Iwanttohaveyourbaby,”sheconfessessoftly.
IthinkaboutwhenIfantasizedaboutherbabybump.Ilookathersoftstomachandimagineababy

growingthere.

Idropmypantsonthefloor.“Whateveryouwant,baby.”Igetbackonthebedandpullherlegsfar

apart,sothatherouterthighsaretouchingthebed.Allthatyogareallypaysoff.

“It’sgoingtohurt,”Iwarn.“Juststaystillandbreathethroughthepain.”
Herfistsareclenched.Ieasetheheadofmycockinsideofhersmall,extremelytightopening.There’s

barelyenoughroomformeinhere.Ipushinalittledeeper.Hereyesaresqueezedshut.

“Breathe,”Itellher.Shestartstobreatheagain.ThenI’mupagainstthebarrierthatmarksherasa

virgin.

Ipushinveryslowly.Shegasps,andIknowithurts.
“Justrelax,baby.”
Iseeherfistsunclenchasshetakesindeepbreaths.ThenI’mslidingintherestoftheway.Istop,

fullysheathedinsideofher,andhereyesopen.

“Thatfeelsincredible.”Herhipsjerkupwards.
Myhipsmoveoftheirownaccord.Isinkinsideherjustalittledeeper.Bothofusmoan.
“Don’tdothat,”Iwarn.“Notifyouwantittolast.”
“WhatifIwantyoutocomeinsideofmerightnow?”
Withagrowl,IputherkneesovermyelbowsandbendherlegsupasIputmybodyontopofhers.
The bed is rocking with the force of my thrusts inside of her. Short screams are coming out of her

throatrightnow.

“Youwantmetoputababyinsideofyou?”
“Yes,yes,please,”shemoans.
Her tits are moving with every thrust. I’m mesmerized by the motion. Her mouth is open. She’s

suckinginairhard.

Thenherwholebodycontractsaroundmycock.Thereisn’tenoughroomformeinsideofher.She’s

squeezingmelikeavise.Shepantsalittlebeforesheopenshereyes.

“Holycow.”
“Baby,youhaven’tseenanythingyet.”Iuntieherhandsfromtheheadboard.

T O W E L S

C A MILLA

eturnsmeoversothatI’monmyhandsandknees.Hepullsmypillowsundermystomach.

“You’vehaditsweetandeasy.NowI’mgoingtogiveityouhard.”

Heteasesmebytracinghiscockaroundmyslit,slidingitforwardandbackwithoutenteringme.I

rockmyhipsback,tryingtocatchhiscock,buthedoesn’tgiveittome.

“Begmeforit.”
I’mpastanykindofshame.“Please,pleasefuckmeagain.”
“Areyousure?”
“Ineedit!”Iscream.
Then his cock is sliding into me. I’m already wet, but this angle pushes him deeper, which I didn’t

think was possible. He’s stretching me to the edge of pain, but I wouldn’t stop him for the world.
Everythingisburning,fiery,blissful.Mymindisfullofwhitefire.

Thenhe’smoving,rockingforwardandback,makingstarsappear.Hishandisinmyhair,andithurts

alittlebitashegripsithard.

Ifeelalittlespurtoffirethattellsmethathispre-comehasalreadyshotout.
“Giveittome,”Idemand.
Aspanklandsonmyrightasscheek.
“Icanfeelit.”Hespanksmeagain.“I’llgiveyouasmuchoraslittleasIwant.”
I drop my head down as he loosens his grip on my hair. His hands are on my shoulders now. He’s

slamming me backwards every time that he rocks forward. I’m helpless here on this bed, totally at his
mercy.He’sthrustingintomealmosthardenoughtohurt.

ThenIfeelfireunleashedinsideofmybody.Thefeelingofhishotseedinsideofmybodyandthe

thoughtofhimgettingpregnantmakemeorgasmagain,mymusclespulsingaroundhiscock.

Heholdsmerightthereasheemptieshimselfinsideofme.
“Staythere.”Hewithdrawsfromme.Ifeelhimleakingoutofme,drippingdownmythigh.Icanhear

himgoingintomybathroomtogetatoweltowipemeup.

I’mexhausted.Hecomesbackandtucksthetowelbetweenmylegsbeforepullingmeintohisarms

andputtingmeintheshower.

Heturnsonthewarmspray.Hesoapsuphishandandcleansmebetweenmythighs,hiseyesonmine.
At first, it’s functional. But it turns dirty when he very thoroughly cleans my clit. He pays so much

attentiontoitthatIcomeagainintheshower,trappedbyhisbodyagainstthetile.

Thenhewashestherestofmeandhimself.Wegetanothertwotowelsandwrapup.
Wegotomybed.Hisheavyarmcirclesaroundme.Ifeelverywarm,safe,andhappy.We’renaked

besidesthetowels,butI’msotiredthatIdriftoffinjustafewmoments.

“

R U D E W A K E - U P C A L L

LIN C O LN

etawayfrommylittlegirl,youfucker.”

Iopenmyeyes.JackisinCamilla’sbedroom.
“Whatthehellareyoudoinghere?”Icheckthatthesheetiscoveringbothofus.

“Ihadafeelingthatyou’dbehere,youpieceofshit.”
“Canyouturnaround?We’renaked.”
Icanseepurefuryblazeinhiseyes,butheturnsaround.
Ifindmyclothes.Herdressfromlastnightisruined.Igetdressed.Ipulladressfromherclosetand

helpherputiton.

“We’regettingmarried.”Iannounceitlikeit’sadonedeal,becauseitis.She’smine,endofstory.No

needtoask.

“Overmydeadbody,”hesnaps,hisbackstillturned.
“Dad,I’manadultnow.Idon’tneedyourapprovaltomarryanybody.Andyou’vealreadycutmeoff,

sotherearen’talotmorecardstoplay.”

“Whataboutschool?Whataboutthecollegeexperience?You’regoingtomarryanoldmanwithout

everexperiencingwhatyoushould.”

“Watchwhoyou’recallingold,”Igrowl,eventhoughIagreewithhim.“Sheknowsallthat.”
“Dad,I’mokay.I’mnotapartygirllikeKelly.Idon’tneedtotryonalotofshoesbeforeIfindthe

rightone.IfounditwithLink.”Herhandisinmine.

Herdadturnsaroundandseesusholdinghands.Hestilllookslikehe’sgoingtoblowup,buthelets

outasmallgroan.

“Thisisn’twantIwantedforyou,Sunshine.”
“I’mhappy,Dad,”shesays,steppingtowardshim.“Andthat’swhatmatters.”
Hejustshakeshisheadandleavestheroom.Ihearthefrontdoorofherapartmentslamshut.
“Justgivehimtime.”Ipullhercloseandkisshermouth.“He’llcomearound.”
“Ihopeso.”Sheputsahandonherstomach.“Ourbaby’sgrandmotherisalreadydead.Itwouldbea

shametohaveourbaby’sgrandfatheroutofthepicture.”

“It’stoosoontoknowifyou’repregnant,”Itellher.“ButI’mreadytotryagain.”
After yanking my clothes off, I peel off her dress to reveal her naked body. There are small marks

whereIbitherlastnight.She’sthemostbeautifulwomanI’veeverseen.Isootheeachofthemarkswitha
lapofmytongue.Herskinhasthetracesoflastnight’spassion,despitetheshower.

Irollherontoherfront,arranginghersothatshe’sfacedown,assuponthebedinfrontofme.
“Good morning, sweetheart.” I push inside of her. She’s pleasantly tight, but I know that I’m not

hurtingher.

“Ahh,”shemoansinreply.IpullhercheeksalittlefurtherapartsothatIcansinkdeeperinsideofher

smallbody.

“I’ll take care of you.” It’s a promise for this moment and also for the rest of our lives. I sink so

deeplyintoherthatIcanfeelhercervixagainstthetipofmycock.

MybreathingpicksupasIthinkofreleasingmyselfinsideofherandmakingababy.Theideamakes

metwitchinsideofherbeforefloodingherwithmyessence.

“Staylikethis.”Iletmycockstayinasitsoftens.She’sstillfacedown.Istrokeonecheek.“Letitsink

in.”

She’squietnow.“Youmeantthat?You’lltakecareofme?Forever?”
“That’sright.”There’sasoftsoundasIpulloutofherwell-lovedbody.“Forever.”
IturnheroversothatIcanseetheafter-lovingglowinhereyes.She’sincredible.
“Don’tbelievehim,sweetie.Hesaysthattoallthegirls.”
Ihopednevertohearthatvoiceagain.Iturnaroundtoseemysordidpastinthedoorway.

“

M A R C I A

C A MILLA

arcia?”I’mlookingpastLinktoseeawomanthatIhaven’tseensincemyfifthbirthdayparty.
“Whatareyouevendoinghere?”

“Reclaimingsomethingthatwasalwaysmine.”Shecomesintotheroom.“He’safantasticlover,isn’t

he?”

IlookatLink’sface.Theskinaroundhiseyesistight.
“Whythefuckareyouhere?”hespits.
“Jackcalledme.Hetoldmetogetyouawayfromhislittlegirl.”
“I’mnotalittlegirl.”
“You’renotenoughofawomantohandleamanlikeLink.”Shehasanexpressiononherfacelikeshe

justsmelledsomethingtotallynasty.“Youmighthavecaughthisinterestwithyourvirginity,butyoucan’t
keepit.”

“Don’tlistentoher,”Linksays.He’sputtingonhispants.“Idon’tknowwhatthefuckyourgameis,

Marcia,butI’mnotfallingforit.”

“Whatashame,”shesays.“Ialwayswantedmysontomeethisfatheroneday.”
Son?Ipullmysheetsaroundme.“Yourson?”
“Ourson.”Marcia’ssmileissmug.“Yourdaddyhasbeenpayingmehushmoneyforyears.Hethought

thatitwasbettertopaymeoffthantotellLinkthathehadasonheknewnothingabout.HeknewthatLink
wouldmarryme,whichhethoughtwasoneoftheworstpossibleoutcomeshecouldimagine.”

Link’sfaceisthecolorofsalt.“Whatthehell?”
“IwasgoingtotellyouwhenlittleRyanturned18.ButwhenyouchosetofuckJack’sdaughter,you

spedupthetimeline.”

“You’re lying.” My voice is very quiet. I’m incredibly afraid right now. I’ve only just started with

Jack…andnowMarciaisreadytoripusapart.”

“Don’ttakemywordforit,littlegirl.”Marcia’svoiceisviciousandsatisfied.Butshesoundssure.

“WecangetacheekswabfrommysonandLink.Easytodoapaternitytest.Andthinkofallthechild
supporthehasn’tpaid.”Shelicksherlips.“Thishasallturnedoutbeautifullyforme.”

“Youconnivingbitch,”Isay.“You’vebeenwaitingalltheseyearsforyourchance,haven’tyou?”
“Linkwasgoingtobemyson’smealticket.Ididn’tknowifyourdaddywasgoingtopayforRyan’s

collegeornot,soIwasgoingtowaituntilRyanwas18.Nocustodybattles,butinthisstate,Linkwould
stillhavetopayforhiscollegetuition.”Shesmoothsherdressdownherhips.“Yourdaddyisagenerous
man,soIwasn’tgoingtomakeamovethisearly.”

“It’snotmybaby,”Linksaid.“I’lltakeapaternitytestorwhatever,butIusedacondomeverytime

withyou.”

“Condomsaren’talwaysperfect,”Marciasays,smirking.“Don’tyourememberwhenitripped?”

Link’sfaceispurewhite.
“Itwasafterherstupidprettyprincessbirthdayparty.Iknewthatyouweregoingtobreakupwithme,

soIsuppliedthecondomthelasttimethatwefucked.Ihadalreadypierceditwithapin,soitfellapart
moreeasily.”

I’mhyperventilating.Marciaissomethingoutofmyworstnightmares.
“Ryanwillbesohappytomeethisdaddy,finally.I’vealwaystoldhimthathe’dmeetyousomeday.

He’soutsideinthecar.”

Marcia is evil and manipulative, but would she use her son in this scheme? It would violate every

maternalinstinct,right?Idon’tknowmuchaboutmothers,sinceIneverreallyhadone,butMarciaclearly
believesthathersonisLink’s.

“

D R I V I N G

LIN K

et’sgetthiscleareduprightnow.Camilla,sittight.I’llbebackinafewhours.”I’mdressednow.
“Let’sgo.IknowalabwhereIcangetthemtoexpeditetheresults.”

Camilla’seyesarefullofdespair.IwishthatIcouldreassureher.Marcia’shappy,butshe’stheonly

personinthisroomwhoisremotelyjoyful.

IfollowMarciaoutoftheroomandintotheelevator.“Secretkid,huh?”
“Jack was really generous with us. He’s been looking after us all this time just for your sake.” She

shrugs.“Ididn’tknowthatIwassoterrifying.”

Idon’tsayanything.JackknowsthewholestoryofMarcia,howshetriedtodestroyme,hammerme

intotheshapeofthemanshewantedinsteadofthemanIwasandam.Heapparentlytriedtoprotectme
untilnow.

I run my hand through my hair, making it stand up. Losing Jack’s friendship is not great, and now I

haveapotentialbabymamashowinguponmydoorstep.Well,Camilla’sdoorstep.Bedroom.

Whilewewerenaked.
Shit.
Whenwegetdownstairs,Icanseethatacarisidling.There’sakidinthebackseat.He’sonsome

kindofNintendohand-helddevice.There’smusicandbeepscomingoutofit.

“Ryan,meetyourdaddy.”
Thekidbarelyglancesupbeforehesays,“Whatever.”
“He’llwarmuptoyou.”Marcia’svoiceisstrained.“Hejusthasn’theardmuchaboutyou.”
“Idon’tneedtoknowaboutwhateverdeadbeatsendsyouacheckeverymonth,thanks.Thankyoufor

yourspermdonationandthecash.Fuckoff.”

“Ryan!”Marcia’svoiceissharp.“That’snotpolite.”
“Whatever.”Ryan’sthumbsaremovingquicklyonhisgamingdevice.“Idon’tcare.”
Notreallyagoodstartifthiskidreallyismine.
“Just give it time.” Marcia’s eyes are a little lost. I know why I was attracted to her. She’s pretty

enough,butshe’sbrokeninside.Iwantedtobeherwhiteknight,butIshouldhavebrokenitoffafterour
firstfight,whenshe’dthrownknivesatme.Liveandlearn.

“Givemeyourphone.I’llputintheaddress.”Marciahandsoverherphone.IopentheMapsappand

tapinthelocation.“I’llfollowyouthere.Isyourphonenumberthesame?”

“Yeah.”
“Callmeifyougetlost.”
Iturnandgotomycar.Whataclusterfuck.FirstthiswholethingwithCamilladestroysmyfriendship

withJack,andthenJacksendsinMarciatoruinthewholething.Ihadnoideathathe’dbeenpayingher
offalltheseyears.

IwatchasMarciastartsdrivingtothelab.Ibackoutofmyparkingspaceandfollowher.
Theheadofthelabknowsmeprettywell,sinceI’moneofhisangelinvestorsforhissidebusiness.

He wanted to revolutionize blood testing. After the crash and burn failure of another huge lab testing
startup,nobodywantedtobedupedagain.I’dtakenachanceonhim.Itwouldbeyearsbeforeinvestors
recovered any money, but the chance that he could do what they tried and failed to do was worth the
money. He had the industry experience that was sorely lacking in the other company, the one that had
causedaseverescandalwhichhadendedwiththeCEObeingbannedfromrunningasimilarcompanyfor
twoyears.

Icallhimfrommycar.
“Hey,Dr.Mike.”
“JustMike.What’sup?”
“Well,JustMike,I’mcomingin.Ineedapaternitytest.”
“Getwildontheweekend?”hejokes.
“Somethinglikethat.”
“Iwaskidding.”
“I’mnot.”
“Holyshit.It’sreallyforyou.”
“Yup.Howfastcanyougetitdone?I’dliketoknowtodayifpossible.”
“I’llfast-trackitwithourlabtechs.”There’samomentofsilence.“Youhaveanillegitimatechild?”
“It’sasurprisetome,”Ireply.“AndIneedtoknowifit’sreal.”
“Icantellyouinafewhourswhetherornotyou’rethefather.Damn,thisislikeabadrealityshowor

daytimetelevision.”

“Iknow.I’monmywaysothatwecanclearthisallupassoonaspossible.”
“We’lldoourbestforyou.”
“We’llbethereinfifteenminutes.Bye.”
Ihittheendcallbutton.Eitherway,I’dhaveananswerwithinafewhours.
When I looked at Ryan, I didn’t see my face. He looks like a male version of Marcia, which could

meananything.I’mprayingthatMarciaisplayingoneofherdumbgames,butifJackputheruptothis,I
canseethatwe’renotgoingtohavehisblessingwhenwegetmarried.

I’ve come inside of Camilla unprotected. She could have my baby inside of her right now. I think

abouthavingafamilywithher,maybetwoorthreekidsrunningaroundmyhouse.Kidswithherhairand
hersmile…

AndnoneofthatwillhappenifMarcia’stellingthetruth.IknowthatCamillawouldstandbymeand

trytotakecareofRyan,butIcan’taskhertobeastepmotherwhenshe’salittlelessthansixyearsolder
thanhim.TouchingherprovedthatIamaselfishbastard,butIknowthatshedeservesthecarefreelifeof
ateenager,notthecrazinessthatraisingRyanwouldbring.

NowI’matthelab.Myheartisbeatingdoubletime.Withtwocheekswabs,wecanseewhichpath

mylifewillgodown.HappinesswithCamilla,aringonherfinger,abunchofkids.Ortakingcareofa
sonIneverknewIhadandlosingCamillaforever.

Itakeadeepbreath,thenIgetoutofthecar.Timetofacethemusic.

L A B T E S T

LIN C O LN

r.Mikeishangingaroundinthelobby.Iknowthathisdailyscheduleisjam-packed,soitmeansa
lottomethathe’shere.

“Youokay?”
Inod.IgesturetowardsMarciaandRyan.Ryanisstillplayinghisgame.“They’rewithme.”
IcanseeDr.Mike’seyestrailoverMarcia.She’sabeautifulwoman.Havingakiddidn’tdiminish

her physical attractiveness. But she’s like non-alcoholic beer for me now — theoretically, it could be
good.Butit’snot.IwatchhimturntowardsRyan.

“He’solderthanalotofthekidsweseeinhere.”
Ishrug.“It’salongstory.”
“Comewithme,please.”Hebringsusintoasmallroom.Therearetwoplasticbaggieswiththings

thatlooklikelongQ-tipsinsmallplasticvials.“Buccalswabsarerelativelypainless.I’mjustgoingto
swabtheinsideofyourcheeksandthengivethesamplestothelab.Link,youwanttogofirst?”

“Yeah.”Isitdownonachairandopenmymouth.Heswabstheinsideofmycheekanddropsthelong

Q-tipintotheplasticvial.

“Onesampledown,onesampletogo.”
“Ryan,openyourmouth.”
Withoutraisinghiseyesfromhisgame,Ryanopenshismouth.IttakesasecondortwoforDr.Miketo

gettheswabinside.HeswabstheinsideofRyan’scheek.

“Ow!”
“Myapologies,”Dr.Mikesayssmoothly,puttingthesecondsampleinaclearlymarkedbag.“Butit’s

overnow.”

“Itbetterbe.”TheangerinRyan’svoicesurprisesme.Thecheekswabwasn’tallthatinvasive,but

Ryanisactinglikehehadtogetashotorsomething.Thegamemusicisdrivingmecrazy.Athisage,I
played some video games, but I also looked at doctors who were taking samples from me. Ryan is
supremelyuninterestedinanythingaroundhim,whichconcernsme.I’lltakecareofitifhe’smykid.

“Couldyoucomebackintwohours?I’llhavetheresultsthen.”
“Sure.”IlookatMarcia.“Doyouwanttogetsomeicecream?”
“Frozenyogurt.”
“There’saplaceacrossthestreet.Italsoservescoffee.”
“Soundsgoodtome.”
Something feels unsettled in the pit of my stomach. Marcia is trying to behave normally, but she’s

touchingthebackofherneck.IsthiskidreallymineordidJackpayhertoshowup?Herstoryisalittle
wild,butitisinlinewithwhatIknowabouther.

Wewalkacrossthestreettothefrozenyogurtcafé.Therearen’ttoomanypeoplethereatthistimeof

day. Ryan finally pauses his game to get double chocolate frozen yogurt. He dumps a ton of chocolate
chips and Hershey’s chocolate syrup on top. I get a little bit of strawberry frozen yogurt. Marcia gets
coconutsurprise,whateverthatis,withlittlebitsofshavedcoconutontop.Ipayforthethreeofus.

As soon as we sit down, Ryan whips out his game. He’s playing one-handed as he shovels the

chocolatemonstrositythathegotintohismouth.MarciaandIarelefttomakeawkwardconversation.

“Whydon’tyoutellmeaboutRyan?”
“Yeah,okay.”Hereyelidsflutterassheblinksrapidly.“SoIknewthatIwaspregnantafterwebroke

up.”Shesticksherspooninhercoconutsurprise.

“Whydidn’tyoucallme?Youhadmyphonenumber.”
“Itriedtocallyourofficefirst.”
“And?”
“Your secretary knew that we had broken up, but I told her that it was urgent. So I talked her into

sendingthecalltoJackinsteadsohecouldmakethecall.”

“And?”Thestrawberryfrozenyogurttastestoosour.
“Jackheardmeout.Wecametoanagreement.Hepaidmeeverymonth,andinreturn,Ididn’truin

yourlife.You’dalreadysaidgoodbyetome.Iknewthatyoudidn’twanttobearoundme.Aslongasthe
checkskeptcoming,everyonewashappy.”

“Howmuchwashesendingyou?”
Shenamesanumberthatmakesmewhistle.
“That’salotofmoney.”
“Silence is expensive.” She waves her hands. I notice that she’s wearing a lot of jewelry, various

rings,bracelets,andanecklacethatlookslikeitcouldbeinawindowdisplaycase.“Andwe’venever
gone without anything. Ryan’s had everything I’ve ever wanted for him.” Her tone is defensive, and I
don’tknowwhy.

“You’vetakencareofhim,then.”Idon’tsayanythingaboutRyan’sdisconnectfromreality.Ifheismy

son,there’stimetofixit.Ifhe’snot,Idon’thavetocare.

“Ineverywaybutone…he’sneverhadafather.”
Icanseethat,butIsay,“Youmightfixthattoday.”
Shestaresatherhands.Oneofherringsiscatchingthesunlightandthrowingrainbowsonthewall.“I

havetotellyousomething.”

“What?”
“Hemightnotbeyours.”
Thesoftchatteroftheothercustomerscheckingoutistheonlysoundbesidesthegamemusic.
“Thenwhydidyou…”
“BecauseJackwaswillingtopaymetokeepmymouthshut.”
“Schrodinger’scat.”
Shenods.“Ididn’tknow,andIdidn’twanttofindout.Itcouldbeyourbaby.Butitwasn’thardto

replaceyou.”

“Youwerewithsomeonerightafterme?”
Sheblushesslightly.“Morethanone.”
Isitandletthatsinkin.“Sothere’snotevena50%chancethatI’mhisdad.”
“It’slowerthan50%.It’slowerthan25%.”
Icouldbepissed,butI’mrelieved.I’mgladnowthatthisisallcomingout,becauseitmeansthatI

couldstillbefreetomarryCamillaandleavethepastalone.

Marcia’scryingalittlebit,althoughshe’spretendingthatshe’sjustwipinghernose.Icanseesome

womeninthefrozenyogurtcaféwithsympatheticeyes.Thentheyturntome.Theirstaresturnicy.They
thinkthatI’mmakinghercry,andIdon’tknowhowtotellthemthatshe’scryingbecauseofwhatshedid,

notanythingI’msaying.

“Ifyou’renotthefather…”
“You’renotgoingtogetthosechildsupportchecksfromJackanymore.Can’tyouhuntdownthereal

father?”

“I only know first names. Even if I wanted to find the other men, it’d be like finding a needle in a

haystack.”

Theotherwomenaretalkinginlowvoices.Itlookslikethey’reabouttocomeovertoourtableand

confrontmeformakinghercry.

“Howaboutthis?IfI’mnotthefather,I’llhireaprivateinvestigatortotrackthosemendown.You

needchildsupportfromsomebody.”

She’snolongercrying.“You’ddothat?”Theotherwomen,whohadalreadygottentotheirfeet,sit

rightbackdownnow.

“I’llpayforthebestprivateinvestigatormoneycanbuy.It’stheleastIcando.”Yeah,she’smooched

offofJackfortwelveyears,butMarciastillneedstotakecareofherkid.“Sodrythosetears.You’re
goingtobeokay.”

“You’reagoodman,Link.”
“Don’ttellanybody,”Isay,winking.“You’druinmyreputation.”
Theconversationiseasyandlightthen.Wetalkaboutheryogapractice,Ryan’sepilepsy,andherhunt

foranewhomeuntilmyphonerings.

R E S U L T S

LIN C O LN

seethenameonthefrontofmycell.It’sDr.Mike.

Iacceptthecall.“Hey.”

“Wehavetheresults.Couldyoucomebackin?”
“We’llberightthere.”Iendthecall.“Theyhavetheresults.”
“It’sbeentwohours?”Marcia’sblinkinglikesomeonewho’sseeingsunlightforthefirsttimeindays.

“Thatwasfast.”

Ishrug.“Goodcompany.”Idon’tfeelanythingforMarciabutrespectforraisingherkidsolo,butI

canstillbepolite.

“Ryan,”shesays,hervoicesuddenlycrackinglikeawhip.“Turnthatthingoffandwalkacrossthe

streetwithus.Anddon’tgetrunover.”

Hecasuallyflipsherthebird,buthedoespausethegameandputitinhispocket.
“I hope that this doesn’t take long. I’ve almost beat the boss. Just a few more minutes to finish this

level.”

We walk back across the street. Marcia’s shoulders have slumped. I think she knows what we’re

goingtofindout.Ryanisfinallylookingatsomethingotherthanhisgame,butthetensioninhisshoulders
saysthathe’snothappyaboutputtingitaway.

Wegointothelobby.Dr.Mikeisleaningagainstawall.“Let’sduckintothesameconsultationroom.”
Wegobackintothesameroomwherewewereswabbed.
“Whataretheresults?”
Hetakesadeepbreathandlooksatthethreeofus.“You’renotthefather.”
I feel like a weight has been lifted. I had a monkey sitting between my shoulder blades that just

evaporates.

“You’llkeepyourpromise?”Marciaasks.
“Ofcourse.”I’llhuntdownthepoorbastardwhohastopaychildsupport.
“That’severythingweneedtoknow,Dr.Mike.”
“Herearetheresults,incaseyouwanttolookbackatthemlateron.”
Hestuffssomepapersinmyhands.Idon’treadthem,butIcanseethatthere’salmostzerochancethat

I’mthefather.

I’vebeengiventheall-cleartopursuewhateverIneedtodowithCamilla.Iturnthepapersoverand

snatchapenfromDr.Mike’stable.

“Here’sthephonenumberofthePIthatIusethemost.Tellhimtobillmeforwhateverworkhedoes

foryou.I’lltexthimrightnowtotellhimthatyou’recomingwithmyblessing.”

Marcia’svoiceissadandtimid.“Ican’tthankyouenough.”
Icaredaboutheronce,connivingwitchthatsheis.

“Ihopeitworksoutforyou.”
Suddenly,shelookstenyearsolderthanshedidwhenwecamein.She’sgoingtolosehergravytrain

forawhile.

“We’regoinghome,Ryan.”
“Thiswholethingwasawasteoftime,”Ryanspits.“Icouldbedoingsomethingworthwhileinstead

ofbeinginasmellyclinic.”

IhopeMarciagetsabetterhandleonhim,eventhoughhe’sbasicallyteenager.Maybehe’llgrowout

ofhisrudeness.Butit’snotmyjobtocareaboutit.

“Thanks,Mike.”MikeshakesmyhandandgivesMarciaahandshake,too.Ryanisalreadywalking

outoftheroom.

Whenwegettotheparkinglot,Iturntoher.“ThiswillbethelasttimeI’llseeyouinalongtime.”
Shenods.“Takecare,Link.”
“You,too.”Iwatchhergetintohercar.IfeellikeIhaveanewleaseonlife.
Iknowmynextstop:thejewelrystore.IneedarockthattellseveryoneCamillaistakenuntiltheend

oftime.

R I N G

C A MILLA

’mtowelingoffafterabath.Idon’tknowwhat’sgoingonrightnow,butIknowthatItrustLinkto
dowhatever’sright.Kellytextedmetotellmethatshewasgoingtobebacktomorrow.Theywere

goinghikingorsomething.IfIcouldlistpeopleleastlikelytogohiking,especiallywithoutgear,Kelly
would be in the top spot. But I also know that Kelly must not be actually planning on real hiking.
Whateverfloatsherboat.

Mymindisinatangle.FirstmydadandthenMarciabargedinonus.WhatifLinkactuallydoeshave

akid?Whatwouldthatmeanforus?

IknowthatIwouldfightforhim,evenifhehadotherresponsibilities.Itouchthesoftcurveofmy

stomach.Hisbabycouldbeinsideofmerightnow.

Igetwetthinkingaboutthewaythathetookmyvirginity.He’sanincrediblelover.I’msogladthatI

gaveittohim,nomatterwhatelsehappens.

Ihearaknockonthefrontdooroftheapartment.
“Coming,”Icall.Isliponadress,nobra,nounderwear.
WhenIlookthroughthepeepholeontiptoe,IseeLinkoutside.
Iunlockthedoor,thenhe’srushinginsideandfallingtotheground.
“Link!Whatareyoudoing?”
He’sononeknee.Hehasabouquetinonehandandaringboxintheother.
“I haven’t asked you yet, but I’m going to fix that. Right now.” He brandishes the bouquet. “These

flowersareforyou.”They’repinkroses.Ismellthem.

“They’relovely.”
“Not half as lovely as you.” He opens the ring box. “Camilla, will you make me the happiest man

alive?Willyoumarryme?”

Iknowwhatthismeans.Idon’taskabouthispossiblechild,becauseIknowthathewouldn’tbeon

onekneeifhecouldn’tofferhimselftome.Iwaspreparedtofighthimifhetriedtopullaway,butit’s
unnecessary.

TherearehappytearsinmyeyeswhenIsay,“Yes.”
Thenhe’sshootingtohisfeet,theengagementringinhishand.Heslidesitontomyfinger.Iadmirethe

shininess,eventhoughmyvisionisblurry.

I’minhisarmsnow,mylegswrappedaroundhimashekissesmymouthhard.
Thenhe’scarryingmeintomyroom.Welandonmysoftbed.Hedoesn’tevenbothertoremovemy

dress, just lifts it to find that I’m bare underneath. His fingers slide into me to get me ready. I stretch
aroundtwoofhisfingersbeforehisheadisgoingbetweenmythighs.Atthefirsttouchofhistongue,my
bodyarchesoffofthebed.

He’sspinningmenow,ahandonthebackofmyheadasIhearhimundoinghispants.Hiserection

slidesintomeeasily.I’mbreathinghard,andmyworldmovesasherocksinandoutofmybody.

Thenhe’sreleasinginsideofme,fillingmeupwithhislove.Whenit’sdone,hepullsoutofmeand

flipsmeover.

“I’msohappy,”Itellhim,playingwithhishairandputtingmymouthclosetohis.
“I’mhappier,”hesays,beforehekissesme.

“

A N N I V E R S A R Y

LIN C O LN

AYEARLATER

oyouthinkJackywillbeokay?He’sonlythreemonthsold.”

“He’llbefine.Hisgrandfatheradoreshim.”

Idriveusbacktomyhome,ourhome.NamingourkidafterJackwentalongwaytowardshealingthe

dividebetweenus.Headoredhisnamesake,whichwaswhyhewasmorethanhappytobabysitforour
anniversary.

Iparkthecarinthegarage,hitthebuttontocloseit,andthenI’mopeningthedoorformywife.
“Nowthatwe’renotgettingupinthemiddleofthenighttoputourlittlemonsterbacktosleep,Iget

youalltomyselfforonenight.”

Ihelpherout,andthenIpushheroverthehoodofthecar.
“Thehoodisreallywarm.”
“Shh,baby.”Ipositionherhandssothatshe’sleaningoverthehood.Ittakesmetwosecondstorip

herunderwearapart.Wehaven’thadachancetohavemuchspontaneoussexeversincethebabycame.
I’vebeenthinkingaboutanniversarysexforafewweeksnow.

I’measingmywayintoherwet,tightchannelrightnow.Evenafterthebaby,shestillcanbarelytake

me.Shelikesbeingbentoveracarhood.

“Thistimewillbequick,baby,butI’llmakeituptoyoulater.”
“Fuckme,”shedemands,andthat’sarequestI’mhappytofulfill.
I’veflippedthebottomofherdresssothatherbareassisvisiblewiththeremainsofherunderwear.I

admirethesightofmydicksinkingintoher.

Itbecomestoomuchafterawhile.Icomeinherlikeateenageboywhocan’tcontrolhimself,pulsing

againandagainasIfillherup.Ipullherdressbackdown,thenIswingherintomyarms.

“Thecomeisgoingtoruinthisdress,Link.”
“That’sariskI’mwillingtotake.I’llreplaceit.”
ThenI’mracingupthestairssothatIcanputherinourJacuzzi.
It’s a smart-home appliance, so I told it to have warm water ready when we got home. I put rose-

scentedbathsaltintotheJacuzzi,andthenIeaseinnexttoher.

“Comehere,baby.”
Sheslidesforwardandstraddlesme.Inthesoapy,sweet-smellingwater,sheisagoddess.Shesmiles

downatmebeforecapturingmymouthforakiss.Iguidemydickintoheropeningforanotherround.I’m
hardagain,eventhoughIjustcameandruinedherdress.

She sighs as she sinks downward on me just a little bit at a time. Then she’s rocking on top of me,

water splashing around us. Her breasts are bobbing in the water. I kiss her throat when she throws her
headbackasherspeedpicksup.

“Oh!”shesqueals,likeshe’ssurprisedbyherorgasm.Feelinghermusclescontractaroundmepulls

myorgasmoutofme.Icomeinsideofher.We’veneverusedprotection,andI’mnotabouttostartnow.

Whenshecomesdownfromherclimax,sheopenshereyesandkissesmegently.
“Thatwasabeautifulanniversarypresent.”ShegetsoffofmylapandthenIputmyarmaroundheras

sherestsherheadonmyshoulder.Ikissherforehead.

“Ihaveasurpriseforyou,too.”
“Yeah?”
“I’mpregnantagain.”
Ifeelmyheartsoar.“Areyouserious?Youjusthadababy.”
“Yup,I’mserious.”
“Well,I’mgoingtohopewehavealittlegirl.Iloveyou,baby.I’msogladImarriedyouandI’mglad

thatwehaveJacky,littlemonsterthatheis.”

“Iloveyou,too.”

THEEND

Document Outline

Fantasy
Closing Time
Email
Coffee
Reading
Last Day
Barbarian
Strawberry Bubble Bath
Camping
Cold Water
Dress Hunt
Under the Table
Following
Mistaken
Fight
To-Go
Going Away
Party
First Time
Towels
Rude Wake-Up Call
Marcia
Driving
Lab Test
Results
Ring
Anniversary

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