DOUBLE UP
Lissa Matthews
www.loose-id.com
Double Up
Copyright © October 2012 by Lissa Matthews
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eISBN 9781623000554
Editor: Jana J. Hanson
Cover Artist: Anne Cain
Published in the United States of America
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Chapter One
Jared wiped his brow. It might be colder than
hell to most, but to him it was scorching. Of
course, he’d been walking down this godforsaken
road now for at least five miles with no scratch of
civilization in sight.
To the right, snowcapped mountains. To the
left, snowcapped mountains. Straight ahead,
snowcapped mountains. Oh sure, there were fields
too. All covered in snow. Only the road was
cleared, and he was grateful for the fact it wasn’t
snowing at the moment. One look at the puffy
clouds above and snow would be falling soon
enough.
Wind bit at his face, and every so often he
had to hold his hat on his head to keep from losing
it. He’d already lost his cool earlier at his
impromptu birthday party. He’d gone outside and
thought to walk around the immediate area for a bit
until his temper had eased, but when he looked,
he’d been in the middle of fuckin’ nowhere on his
way home.
Home. It hadn’t been home since Bryson had
moved out with Walt. Just as well. He clearly
wasn’t fit company for anyone.
The sight of the two men who had his guts all
torn up walking in, laughing and carryin’ on with
each other along with all the cowboys and ranch
hands set his teeth on edge. Everyone looked so
happy, but all he felt was pain mixed with a whole
heapin’ helpin’ of dick-hardenin’ lust. He
wouldn’t give any thought to the love that filled
him, though. Nope. It didn’t pay well enough to go
there.
The truck was on him before he ever heard it
comin’. Shit.
“You’re being an ass, Jared,” Bryson yelled
out the window. “Get in the truck.”
“Go to hell,” he yelled back.
“Been there for the last three fuckin’ months,
thank you. Get in the goddamn truck. It’s cold, and
we need to talk.”
Jared kept walking, and Bryson kept inching
along. Ten feet turned into fifteen turned into
twenty before Jared stopped. He bent forward, his
hands on his knees, and took a few deep breaths,
willing his heart to stop racing. He never expected
anyone to follow him, least of all Bryson. He also
never expected to be walking halfway back to the
ranch in winter.
He stood to his full height to find Bry in front
of him. Blue fire lit his eyes, and that tic in his jaw
was going a mile a minute. Bry was pissed. Good.
Jared had been pissed for ninety-three days, not
that he was counting or anything.
“What the hell is the matter with you?”
“Me? What’s the matter with me? What are
you doin’ showin’ up at my party? I don’t
remember inviting you. And not only do you come,
but you bring him.” He spat the word out like it
disgusted him, but the reality of it was, the two
men had been a welcome sight for his bloodshot
and tired eyes.
“What was I supposed to do? Leave him at
home? How nice. Jesus, Jared. You’re the one
who brought him into our lives. You love him as
much as I do. You want him as much as I do, so
don’t go acting all self-righteous about it. For
months you’ve been rejecting the both of us,
denying all of us.”
“You and he share a bed. What do—”
“A little jealous, J?” Bryson quipped,
interrupting Jared's words. “Doesn’t become you.
But yeah, we share a bed. You want some details?
You and I used to share a bed too. Get off it, man.
You’re not fooling anyone but yourself.”
Jealous? Hell yes he was jealous. But not a
little jealous. A whole damn lot jealous. There
were other things he felt too, like scared and angry
and left out and…left. “Fuck off.”
“I’d rather fuck you.”
Jared stood in stunned silence at Bryson’s
frankness. He was usually more subtle. Shock hit
him in the face a second before Bry’s fist clocked
him. He stumbled backward and reached out to
grab the side of the truck bed to keep from falling.
“What’d you do that for?” he asked, swiping the
back of his hand across his mouth, drawing blood
along with it.
“You deserved it and a lot more besides.”
“Why? I didn’t do anything to you.” Surprise
lit Bryson’s face, and Jared wished he could call
the words back. He’d done plenty and didn’t want
to be reminded word for word. He spent enough
time alone these days, beating himself up over
demanding that Bryson leave and take Walt with
him.
“You’ve been an ass. For three goddamn
months, you’ve been an ass. I didn’t bring Walt to
the party. We came together as a couple. That
make you happier? He’ll be along shortly too, if I
don’t return soon.”
“Well, don’t let me stop you from leaving me
the hell alone.”
“C’mon, J. It’s your birthday. Can’t we just
put all this aside for one night and have fun
together?”
“There is no together. And why will he be
along soon? He not trust you?”
“God, stop being such a brat. He trusts me
just fine, but he’s worried about you, and he’ll be
worried about me.”
“Worried about me? Didn’t look like that
from where I stood.”
“Maybe because you were too busy lookin’
for a reason to storm out.”
Jared wouldn’t, couldn’t let Bry know he was
right. “Bullshit.”
“Is it?”
“Yeah, it is. We done? I have some place else
to be.” Jared started to move, but Bryson grabbed
Jared’s arm, effectively stopping Jared’s progress.
“Let. Go,” he ground out.
Bryson tightened his grip. “No. You’re not
runnin’ away from this again. From me. We’re
gonna settle it.”
“There’s nothin’ to settle.”
“Uh-huh. Try tellin’ that to someone who
doesn’t know you as well as I do. Where is it you
have to be?”
Jared clenched his jaw tight. “Anywhere
that’s away from you.”
“Tough, asshole. I’m not leavin’. Neither are
you. You have to stop fightin’ this.”
“I’m not fighting. You’re the one who hit me.”
“Now you’re just playin’ dumb.” Bryson
attempted to pull Jared closer. “You can’t make all
the rules and expect everyone but you to follow
them.”
Jared wrenched his arm free and stepped out
of reach. “I don’t make the rules because there are
none. There’s no us either.” Not because he didn’t
want there to be, though. God, he missed the man
standing in front of him. He missed the big Indian
back at the bar too. He missed the way they had
been, all of them, when it was working, when they
could laugh and joke and sit around together as
friends and go to bed as lovers. He fuckin’ missed
everything about the way it was before he got
scared and jealous. He just didn’t know how to fix
it.
“You tried that before, remember? When we
left home and you didn’t think there could be an
us? I proved you wrong before. I’ll prove you
wrong again.”
“It’s true this time.”
“The hell it is! Just because you think you
won when Walt and I left, giving you what you
said you wanted, doesn’t mean there’s not an us.
There will always be an us, J. We both know that,
and you’ll come around.”
“No, I won’t.” He heard the petulant tone in
his voice when he spoke, but he was afraid Bryson
was right. Again. He hated Bry being right about
everything all the damn time.
He stared hard, daring the other man to hold
the glare. Bry did until Jared gave in. He dropped
his gaze and shook his head. He told himself he
wouldn’t stomp as he turned away. He would walk
heavily, but he sure as shit wouldn’t stomp. One
foot in front of the other. That’s all he needed to
do. If he concentrated hard enough on that, he
could make it down the road. Bryson would get the
hint and go back the way he came, back to Jared’s
birthday party.
He hated being brokenhearted. He hated being
left out in the cold too. At least, figuratively. Even
though he’d done it to himself and forced it on all
of them… God. It all just fucking sucked. He didn’t
want to go home without Bryson. It hadn’t really
even been home since, as Bryson said, he and Walt
gave Jared what he wanted when he asked them to
leave. It was a house. Four outside walls. Without
the laughter and talking and planning a future for
the ranch and for themselves, four outside walls
was all it was. There was no heart, no warmth, no
pleasure.
Boy, he’d screwed up. He’d given them a
choice, an ultimatum. Either they leave or he
would. It seemed so simple at the time, like the
right thing to do. If he didn’t have to see them
together, his heart wouldn’t hurt.
It wasn’t the first time he’d been wrong.
“Jared,” Bryson called after him, his voice
carrying on the howling wind.
Jared waved him off and kept on walking. He
heard the slam of the truck door and the engine
crank. Good. Bryson was leaving, and Jared could
get home in peace, drink the six-pack in the fridge,
and wish himself a happy birthday in classic style.
Bryson pulled up alongside him again. “At
least take the truck, J. It’s stupid for me to drive it
back to the bar when you’ll have to walk all the
way back to get it tomorrow.”
“You shouldn’t even be driving my truck.”
“God, you’re such a pigheaded ass.”
Jared grinned, though he was sure it wasn’t a
good one. “Takes one. I’m done talking.”
“Jared…”
“See me, Bry? I’m walking away. You should
do the same.”
“You are such a…” Bryson growled and
slammed his hand against the steering wheel.
“Fine, asshole. But this isn’t over. I’ll be by later
to finish it.”
Bryson gunned the motor, spinning the wheels
in the snow that was beginning to fall. Wetness
kicked up in Jared’s face before he could turn his
head. He lifted his hand as a shield and just caught
the taillights as they disappeared around the bend
in the road up ahead.
“Good riddance,” Jared muttered as he pulled
up the collar of his coat against the biting cold.
The flannel lining with the denim layer on top
helped keep some of the biting cold away from his
skin. The hat on his head kept the snow from
getting to him. Of course, it didn’t hurt that he was
walking hard and fast toward home.
It was one thing seeing Bryson, but he could
have done without seeing Walt. Shit, the truth of it
was, seeing both men had been wonderful. He’d
felt it in his gut and his dick. The way he’d
hardened within seconds of them walking through
the door and making a beeline for him… He hadn’t
felt that kind of blinding arousal in so damn long.
They were the only two men he’d loved in his
thirty-year existence. One from his past and one
from his present. Only thing was, they were now
together and he was alone.
Bryson and Walt had locked eyes once, and
that was all she wrote. It was love at first sight.
Even a blind man could have seen it. That same
blind man could have seen that Jared had been in
love with Bryson since they were twelve years
old.
The wrongest wrong thing in all this was how
Jared had acted in the end. He was fine with
Bryson and Walt loving each other. He was fine
with himself and Walt loving each other. He didn’t
have a problem with anything they did alone or
together. They’d all been in sync with sex, with the
ranch, with living together from the get-go. It had
been so perfect in a way that made him hurt to
think about now.
That’s what didn’t make sense to Jared.
Everything worked. Everything meshed. Yeah,
they’d had a few arguments, but nothing a little
yelling and cocksucking couldn’t fix. He couldn’t
understand what had spooked him.
No, that wasn’t true. What had spooked him
was a dream. A stupid fucking dream that had
woken him in a cold sweat but had left his lovers
sleeping. He hadn’t been able to shake the feeling
of unease, and every time he saw Bryson and Walt
together—and it didn’t matter if it was in
conversation or having sex—Jared’s gut twisted in
fear, and all he could think about was that maybe
the dream had been right. Maybe they really didn’t
want him as much as he wanted them. Maybe they
really would turn their backs on him the way his
father had years ago back home when Jared had
come out of the closet.
He had no idea what triggered the dream and
no idea what made it hard for him to shake it, but it
festered inside him until one night he exploded and
demanded Bryson and Walt leave.
“This is so not how someone should spend
their thirtieth birthday,” he grumbled at the ground.
He looked up through the blowing snow. A few
miles more and he’d be at the gate of the ranch.
He’d done his best to keep from seeing the
two men on a day-to-day basis since that awful
night. He’d created a situation that was eerily
similar to how things had been with his father after
the fiasco of being honest with the old man. A
fistfight—their first but not their last—had ensued.
Arguments and brawls kept coming his way until
Jared moved out to the bunkhouse with his father’s
ranch hands. They’d all kind of looked at him
sideways and kept their distance. As soon as he
graduated high school, he’d packed what he could
carry and hauled ass. His father hadn’t been sad to
see him go, and Jared hadn't let anyone, especially
his father, know how deeply that had hurt.
He thought he’d be leaving alone back then,
but Bryson had met him at the end of the long dirt
drive with the words, “Where you go, I go.” It’d
been that way for over ten years. The difference
between then and now, though, was that he hadn’t
been the one who'd left.
Shit. He never thought he’d be in this
predicament. It was of his own making, but that
didn’t mean it was any easier to take. He and Bry
might each own half the ranch, and Walt might be
their foreman, and they might put up a good front of
being in sync when it came to running the property,
but that was as far as it went now. At least for him.
He slept in the main house alone, and they had
taken to sleeping in a cabin on the southeastern
ridge. Some of the cattle grazed down there, but
mostly it was open range for the horses, Walt’s
specialty.
Jared had toyed with the idea of selling them
his share of the ranch and going his own way, but
Bryson’s words from so long ago always kept him
in place. “Where you go, I go.” Truth of the matter
was that he’d rather be near them in this amazing
piece of the country than anywhere else.
He and Bry had saved every penny they’d
ever earned to get as far away from their
hometown as possible. Montana was where they’d
set their sights. Beautiful, wild, open. It was
everything they’d dreamed it would be. They’d
grown up as the best of friends, just as their fathers
had. Then one night after a ball game, they were
walking home, and their hands had accidentally
brushed. He’d looked over at Bry, and Bry’d
looked back at him. Their fingers had intertwined
as if of their own accord, and when Bry’d
whispered, “Okay,” and squeezed Jared’s hand,
Jared had known then that things had changed
forever.
They’d always been inseparable before, but
from that night forward, it was different. Jared
tried to pretend things were the same, even when
they left home. It took Bryson planting a heck of a
kiss on Jared’s lips the second they crossed the
border into Texas to make him see the truth. It was
their first kiss, and Jared couldn’t deny his feelings
any longer. He was free to feel them, free to
explore them, free to love Bryson.
Back home they’d had to take care how they
acted toward each other, but once they reached
Montana, they never did. They didn’t publicize the
fact that they were gay, but they didn’t go to great
lengths to hide it. The only person to ever pick up
on it or come right out and ask was Walt.
“Shit.” He needed to stop thinking about the
past and try to figure out what to do about his
present and future. Though, he had no clue what he
wanted to do because all he could think about was
the two men he wanted in his bed again.
He rounded the bend in the road where Bry’s
taillights had disappeared some time ago. Give or
take a couple of hundred yards, and he walked
through the entrance to the J Double B Ranch. They
hadn’t been able to decide whose initial would
grace their new home. In the end, they’d settled on
both, earning odd looks and reluctant nods from the
bank and the real estate agent.
Jared kicked up the snow that was steadily
falling and starting to pile up along the dirt path.
He’d need a hot shower when he got inside the
house to ward off the bone-deep chill that no
amount of layers could keep away. It wouldn’t take
long to drink himself into a stupor and fall asleep.
The sooner the better, to his way of thinking.
His sprawling one-level, U-shaped house
came into view with its long wraparound porch
disappearing around the sides. For the first time
since Bry and Walt had walked into the bar
together earlier, he smiled. He was home. Or at
least, he was partially home. His other home, the
one he’d found in Bry’s arms, was no longer his.
The smile faded as quickly as it had
appeared. Jared stomped onto the porch and inside
through the never locked door. He slammed it
behind him, feeling a very small bit of satisfaction
when all the windows along the front of the house
rattled.
The first beer was procured from the fridge
on his way to his room and a shower. With any
luck, he’d be drunk before his hair dried.
* * * *
“You sure we should be doing this?” Even
whispers sounded like yelling when all was quiet.
Bryson slanted a look at Walt. “I’m sure,” he
said with finality. “It’s time for him to come to
grips with this.”
Walt snorted. “I haven’t known him near as
long as you have, but I have to say, I don’t think he
wants to.”
“Tough shit, then,” Bryson returned hotly.
And it was tough shit. For Jared. He’d been in
charge of their lives for too long and continued to
muck it up. Bryson and Walt had wanted to give
Jared time and thought for sure Jared would come
to his senses on his own. Evidently not. Jared
could give a mule a run for his money in the
stubborn department.
“He’ll say it won’t work, the three of us.”
The uncertainty and edge of quiet resignation in
Walt’s voice made Bryson’s chest ache. Walt
wanted things to work out for all of them just as
much as Bryson did. In his own way, maybe more
so. While Jared and Bryson knew everything about
each other, there was still so much for both of them
to learn about Walt and vice versa.
“He’ll be wrong.” Bryson didn’t want to think
about Jared not being able to come to grips with
his feelings and to get over his damn fears and
jealousy. Jared had never really told them what’d
happened to make him want to end things. Bryson
hadn’t thought he’d have to hold on to his questions
for months, aching for answers.
“Even you don’t know that.”
“True, but I know him. I know how he feels
about me, regardless of what he says. I know how
he feels about you too. And it’s time for this shit to
stop.” They couldn’t let Jared win or push them
away again. Bryson loved him too much to let
Jared’s fears win. Life just didn’t make sense
without Jared, and while Bryson had been living
without Jared on a day-to-day basis for three
months, he wasn’t willing to live any more days
without him.
Out of the corner of his eye, Bryson saw Walt
nod. They both knew this would be an uphill
battle. Bry’s feelings for Jared hadn’t changed—
not in the least—he just had feelings for Walt too.
And he wasn’t the only one. Jared had feelings for
the other man as well, which Walt returned in full
measure.
Bryson turned the headlights off as he neared
the house. He didn’t want Jared to refuse to open
the door or greet them on the porch with a shotgun.
Bryson stopped a good thousand feet or so from
the front of the house and turned the engine off.
They needed to be silent as the grave until the
moment they knocked on the door. Or maybe…
“He might not answer the door, you know,”
Walt said.
Bryson nodded at the other man’s whispered
words, which mirrored Bry’s own thoughts
moments earlier. “Hopefully he hasn’t started
locking it.”
“Wouldn’t put it past him.”
They stepped quietly onto the wooden porch,
and Bryson hesitated for just a second before
opening the door and walking through as though he
owned the place. He grinned in the darkness.
Technically, he did. At least half of it. He and
Walt had simply moved out to the small cabin
when Jared refused to take the step that would
have kept them all under the same roof and in the
same bed. To tell them what was wrong.
The interior of the house was quiet, and save
for the flicker of the television in the living room
to the left, there was no other light. Three beer
cans sat in a small pyramid on the coffee table, and
Jared lay sleeping on the couch, one bare foot on
the ground. He was shirtless, and his jeans were
unbuttoned. He’d lost weight in the last few
months, and the snoring he used to do had all but
ceased. Something about that familiar sound being
gone made Bryson sad.
Jared hadn’t been overweight, just a wall of
solid muscle, but after Bryson and Walt moved
out, Jared had worked himself just shy of
exhaustion. It was how he battled being upset.
Instead of talking things out or confronting what
was wrong, he worked and slept and drank. It kind
of pissed Bryson off, but in the past, given some
time, Jared would usually get to a place where he
was willing to talk. It seemed now that Bryson was
going to have to force Jared into it.
“What’s the plan now?” Walt asked, quietly
gathering up the beer cans.
“Wake his ass up,” Bryson offered to Walt’s
retreating back. He leaned over Jared, unable to
resist the other man’s lips. They were full and soft
and split and bruised in the right corner where
Bryson had punched him earlier. He tried to feel
bad about it but didn’t.
He could kiss those lips now, though, and he
did. The touch was tender, barely there, but enough
that Jared shifted in his sleep.
Bryson missed sleeping with Jared in a way
that sleeping with another man would never take
the place of. Jared was his first love, his true love,
his soul mate. Walt was as well, but it was a
different kind of love. It was hard and rough and
lustful. He could probably on some level live
without Walt if he had to, but there was no way in
hell he could ever live without Jared. That he’d
tried to abide by Jared’s wishes for the last three
months was testament to how much the other man
meant to him. But Bryson was tired of it, tired of
missing Jared, and he was going to make the
stubborn cowboy see reason even if it killed all
three of them.
Walt slipped silently back into the room and
behind Bryson, his hands finding Bry’s hips. At
this angle, with Bry bent over Jared as he was, he
could continue kissing Jared, and Walt could slide
easily into Bryson’s ass were they not dressed.
The ridge of Walt’s cock rubbed insistently
against Bryson. “You want this?” Walt asked as
his hand crept around and down the front of
Bryson’s jeans to cup the cock straining there.
“Yes,” Bryson groaned, his mouth inches
away from Jared’s lips. If the man woke up now,
Bryson wasn’t sure what any of them would say.
He had a fleeting image in his head that they would
all be still as statues. Jared would be the first to
move, erupting up from the couch in outrage, and
Bryson wouldn’t be able to blame him. To keep
that from happening, Bryson straightened and
leaned back into Walt’s chest. Walt didn’t let go of
Bryson’s cock, and Bryson didn’t ask him to.
“I know you love him,” Walt whispered
against Bryson’s ear. “I know you love me too, but
if it will—”
Bryson turned suddenly, nearly knocking them
both off balance. He grabbed hold of Walt’s face
in his hands and kissed the man soundly. “No,” he
spoke softly against Walt’s lips, then pulled back,
but stayed in Walt’s immediate, personal space.
“No buts, no ifs. You aren’t leaving. I’m not letting
you go. That’s not an option, Walt. Do you hear
me? That’s not an option.”
“But letting me go was?”
Chapter Two
“But letting me go was?”
Bryson closed his eyes as pain lanced through
him. Jared’s words both shocked and wounded
him. Not that he blamed the man for seeing it that
way. Walt squeezed Bryson’s hips in his large
hands, then eased away, giving Bryson room
enough to move toward Jared.
Bryson knelt on the floor next to the couch,
his head level with Jared’s. “Letting you go was
never an option either. It was your choice.”
“But you did it.” As easily as my family did.
Jared didn’t actually say that, but Bryson knew it
was part of what he thought, part of what drove
him into being such an ass about everything with
Walt.
“Only for a short time to let you cool off, to
let you think or feel or hell, I don’t know. It just
seemed at the time you didn’t want to listen or
even try. You were blinded by your own
insecurities, J. Your own jealousy. I just wish I
knew what had brought it on.”
“Bry…” The warning notes were there. A
smarter man might have heeded that warning and
backed off, dropped the conversation, or realized
that Jared wasn’t ready to talk yet. Bryson had
been kicked in the head by horses, mules, even a
couple of steer. He wasn’t a smarter man.
“I’m not letting you do this anymore. The
game has changed. My rules now.”
“This isn’t a fuckin’ game!” Jared’s shout
rang in Bryson’s ears.
“Isn’t it? Who can one-up the other one? Who
can hurt who first? You can’t run from me or from
who you love. We’ve been over this. This is my
life too, Jared, and I’m tired of you holding it
hostage. I’m done with giving in and letting you
have your space. If you’re not willing to fight for
me, for us, for all of us, that’s fine. But I am
willing, and I’ll do all the fighting for it.”
“Get out of my house,” Jared yelled. He made
to stand up, but Bryson reached out with his arm
and anchored Jared’s shoulders to the cushions.
“It’s my house too, and I’m not done talking to
you.”
“Well, I’m done talking to you, and if you
want the house, fine. You can buy my share, and
I’ll get out.”
Walt stepped into the fray. “The hell you
will.”
Jared glared. “This isn’t about you, Walt.”
“Right,” he scoffed. “We all know that isn’t
true. It’s all about me.”
“Arrogant ass.”
“Hey,” Bryson butted in, “I thought that was
my name.” Tension from his defiance and sheer
muleheadedness settled into Jared’s shoulders
under Bryson’s hands, and he grinned. Jared hadn’t
expected the fight, even with the beginnings of it
earlier in the evening. Damn fool.
“Fine. You’re both arrogant asses. Now get
the fuck out.”
“Not a chance.”
Jared groaned and sagged back onto the
cushions. “What do you want from me? I’ve given
you two my blessing and stayed out of your way.
What more do you want?”
“We want you, you dumb-ass. We’ve always
wanted you. I’ve always wanted you,” Bryson
implored. “That hasn’t changed, J.”
“Until he came along,” Jared grunted, nodding
his head toward Walt.
“Don’t lay this on me or him. You wanted him
too. Just as much as I did. You brought him home.
You.”
“For fun. I didn’t expect you to fall in love
with him the second he sank his dick in your ass.”
Sadness colored the words, but the heat was from
more than just Jared’s anger. Bryson saw it in
Jared’s eyes and in the hard bulge beneath Jared’s
zipper.
“What? The way you fell in love with him
when he did it to you too? You’re as deep in this
as I am. He gave us both what we wanted, and we
gave him what he needed.”
Jared’s temper flared. “Fuck you, asshole.”
“Precisely. Here on the couch or in the bed?”
“As if. Get. Out.”
“You’re in love with him, J,” Bryson said, his
tone conversational, his nerves a mess, completely
ignoring Jared’s outburst. It was a tactic his mother
had used on him when he was a child. When
Bryson pitched a fit over something, she’d go on in
conversation as though he wasn’t standing there
hollering. Eventually, once he realized he wasn’t
getting his way, he’d stop. He figured that taking
this kind of approach with Jared couldn’t hurt.
“Am not.”
Bryson’s temper teetered on the edge of
knock-down, drag-out. “Goddamn, get it through
your thick skull that we’re not trying to take
anything away from you. We’re trying to fucking
love you.” Jared’s flush in the light of the
television revealed him a haggard, tired man. He
was fighting himself and them so hard. Bryson’s
resolve faltered momentarily as he thought to give
Jared exactly what he wanted: for Bryson and Walt
to leave.
When Walt put his hand on Bryson’s
shoulder, giving it a squeeze, strength seeped in,
and he nodded inwardly to himself. He wasn’t
giving up. He couldn’t. He loved the man on the
couch with his whole being, and he couldn’t lose
him. “We’re not going anywhere.”
Jared shoved Bryson and shot up off the
couch. He wobbled a little but quickly regained his
balance. “You’re trespassing.”
“Try again. I own half, dipshit. You’re
grasping now. Admit you want us both, and we can
all move forward.”
“Fine. I’ll sell you my part,” Jared said again,
resigned.
Bryson stood stock-still. Jared loved this
piece of out-in-the-middle-of-fucking-nowhere
Montana land more than anything. This was home
for him, more than Texarkana ever had been. “You
don’t mean that.”
“I offered before.”
“Jared, man…” Walt interrupted, stepping
between the two men.
Jared balled his fingers into fists. “Get out of
my face.”
Walt took another step, leaving less than an
inch of space between their chests, their noses,
their hard cocks encased in denim. Bryson had felt
Walt’s erection when he’d stood close behind him.
They were all in need of each other, and he wished
to hell Jared could see it. But Jared’s stubborn
hide had years of practice when it came to ignoring
or turning a blind eye to something right in front of
his face. His father had been the same way, which
was where Jared had learned it.
“No. You want to hit me, fine. Let’s go. But
you’re gonna get over this shit.”
“You’re not the boss around here, Walt.”
Calm, coiled strength radiated off Walt’s
back as he chuckled low under his breath. His
muscles were tense, his skin hot through his shirt.
He was fairly vibrating with trying to keep it all
together, keep it all inside. Bryson knew what was
on the other end of that level of hunger. He’d been
the proud and submissive recipient of it several
times over the months. It was Jared’s turn now.
Walt lowered his voice and filled whatever
minute bit of space was left between him and
Jared. “Is that what you need? A boss? I’ll happily
take you over my knee.”
Jared’s eyes widened, and he tried to take a
step back, but he came in contact with the edge of
the couch. He started to lose his balance again, but
Walt grabbed for him, lightning quick, to keep him
on his feet. Bryson had never seen the two men go
toe-to-toe. They were nearly the same in height,
one light and one dark. It was quite a sight, and it
had him even harder than before.
“Just how much did you have to drink tonight,
J?”
Jared looked over Walt’s shoulder at Bryson.
“None of your damn business. And you”—he
glared at Walt—“get your goddamn hand off me.”
“No.”
It was Jared’s turn to go still, but the glint in
his eye was such that no one in their right mind
would trifle with it. “I said get your hand off me.”
“And I said no. I’m tired of you acting like a
spoiled child who lost his favorite toy and treating
Bryson like this. You pushed him away. You gave
him up, but it ends right here, right now.”
The tension between the two men was so
thick it could be cut only with a really large blade.
Bryson waited. He was both touched by Walt
standing up for him and a little guilty for the way
he and Walt were ganging up on Jared. Was this
the best way to make Jared see reason? Bryson
wasn’t so sure anymore.
For what seemed like hours, Jared and Walt
were locked in a staring contest, just as Bryson
and Jared had been earlier. He was such a
stubborn cuss. Jared hadn’t blinked, and Bryson
would guess Walt hadn’t either. Bryson was just
about to tell Walt to forget it for the night, that
they’d try again some other time, but all of a
sudden the fight went out of Jared. The tension
visibly eased, and sadness filled his eyes.
Before Bryson could do anything, Walt pulled
Jared that last centimeter closer and kissed him. It
was an openmouthed, tongue-taking-charge, full-on
assault. Walt wrapped an arm around Jared’s back
and held him still and then, after a heart-stopping
moment, Jared joined in on the kiss, giving back
every bit of fierceness Walt had unleashed on him.
Bryson stepped to the side to watch the kiss.
There was nothing hotter to him than two
hardheaded males going at each other. He was
content to observe, just as he had been the first
time they’d all been together. He knew how Jared
felt about him and was secure in how he felt about
Jared. Loving Walt didn’t take away from that.
Hell, on his end, it gave it more, added more.
Whatever had rocked Jared…
Bryson wanted both men equally. He had
different feelings for each one, but both got him
hard, both got him wanting. He loved them,
couldn’t imagine being without them in his life,
and the living the last few months without Jared in
his bed had been one of the hardest things he’d had
to endure. A piece of his heart and soul was
missing. He was lucky in that Walt didn’t see it as
taking anything away from their relationship. He
was in love with Jared too, after all.
Walt and Jared had their eyes closed, their
lips mashed together, and Bryson could see their
tongues touch the inside of each other’s cheeks.
Walt pulled back and took a breath. Jared took one
as well, and just as he started to say something,
Bryson wrapped his hand around the back of
Jared’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss, stifling
whatever words might have been uttered.
He might be content to watch for a few, but he
needed a taste of Jared himself. It had been too
damn long, and he was dying inside. Jared must
have felt the same way. Bryson’s heart soared as
Jared turned toward him and wrapped himself
around Bryson’s body.
Jared moaned when Bryson’s tongue swept
into his mouth, and Bryson echoed the sound. The
need flowing from Jared’s body was palpable in
the heavy air surrounding them.
Jared’s body was urged closer, and when
Bryson cracked open his eyes, he found Walt
pressed against Jared’s back, his black eyes full of
heat and hunger. His long arms bracketed Jared’s
hips, and his fingers pulled at Bryson’s belt loops.
They were held together with Jared in the middle,
just the way it should be, the way it needed to be.
Always.
Bryson sucked on Jared’s tongue even as
Jared tried to take it back into his own mouth.
Bryson clamped his teeth down on it and gave a
hard tug, swallowing Jared’s groan of surrender to
more kissing. He knew they needed to come up for
air, but he was so afraid to let go of the man.
Jared took the choice away from him by
finally lifting his head. “This doesn’t change
anything.”
“You’re lying, man. It changes everything,”
Walt growled into Jared’s ear, loud enough in the
silent room for Bryson to hear. “Are you so
blinded by your own sense of betrayal and
jealousy that you can’t see the way Bry looks at
you or the way I do?”
“He doesn’t—”
“He does,” Walt whispered softly, his lips
trailing down the side of Jared’s neck, then up to
his ear, his teeth nipping at the lobe. “He aches for
you every night. He’s sleeping with me, and that’s
your own damn fault because you were dumb
enough to bar him from your bed, but I feel how
much he misses you. He needs you same as you
need him.”
Jared closed his eyes and shook his head. His
labored breathing echoed around the room,
bouncing off the walls. Bryson hurt to see Jared so
torn, fighting himself and his heart’s desires. He
reached up and placed his fingers over Jared’s
lips. With his other hand, he cupped the outline of
Jared’s cock. He was so hard that Bryson felt the
blood pounding through Jared’s jeans.
Jared’s eyes popped open. He started to say
something, but Bryson took that moment to slide
two of his fingers between Jared’s lips and teeth.
“Suck them.”
Immediately, Jared closed around the digits
and sucked. It wasn’t tender or loving or even
meant to entice. It was rough and hard, like he was
trying to suck flesh from bone. Bryson was good
with that. Jared always sucked hard, whether it be
on fingers, a lollipop, or a cock. He used his
whole strength and power and made sure the
receiver would feel the tight suction for days
afterward and miss it.
Bryson groaned when Jared’s tongue forced
his fingers apart and licked between them, flicking
against the webbing the way he loved to flick at an
asshole. Bryson’s hand tightened on Jared’s cock,
and he rubbed it with hard pressure through
Jared’s jeans.
There was nothing he wouldn’t do to win
back the man in front of him, but neither would he
give up Walt. He’d found everything he could have
ever wanted with the two men. He couldn’t and
wouldn’t give either one up.
Bryson crowded Jared, forcing him to lean
back into Walt’s chest. Jared moved his hips in a
small side-to-side motion Bryson might have
missed if he didn’t have hold of Jared’s dick. As it
was, he did feel it and knew by the shadows in
Jared’s eyes—how they gave way to the lust—that
he must have felt the rigidness of Walt’s erection.
“Yeah, J. I know you feel it. I know you want
it as much as we want to share it with you.”
Walt nodded behind Jared and rested his chin
on Jared’s shoulder, his eyes watching the give-
and-take of Bryson’s fingers in Jared’s mouth.
Bryson slowly extracted his fingers and reached
over to offer them to Walt. He took them eagerly,
sucking Jared’s taste in.
This was how Bryson had wanted them to be
since Jared brought Walt home that night half a
year ago.
Jared found Walt walking along the road,
same as Bryson had found Jared earlier in the
evening. Walt’s straight-to-his-shoulders black
hair, matching black eyes, and the naturally dark
Native American skin had turned both Bryson and
Jared on. His high cheekbones, hard-worked tall
body, easy smile, and intense sexual presence had
pulled them in like a magnet. The chemistry
between the three men had been amazing. Falling
for Walt had been inevitable. Whether Jared
wanted to admit it now or not, Bryson knew the
truth.
“I don’t think this is a good idea.” Jared’s
voice cracked with dryness.
“You don’t get to make the decision. It’s out
of your hands tonight.”
Jared’s eyes flew open, and tension tightened
his body. “You can’t force me.”
Bryson squeezed Jared’s firm penis he’d been
palming. “As if I have to force you, J. But you’re
not going to tell me no. You’re hurting us all.” He
brought his other hand up to unzip Jared’s jeans.
“Your beautiful mouth is going on my dick, and
Walt’s dick is going to replace that corncob you
shoved up your ass months ago. You need to give it
up, J. You belong to me, to us, and we belong to
you. It’s time you accepted it.”
Chapter Three
Walt tugged Bryson closer, one more inch for
one more moment, before letting him go. He’d
found a home with the two cowboys from down
South, and he wasn’t about to let anything—
including one of them being stubborn—fuck with
it. He was as head over heels for them as they
were for him. He’d been wandering nearly all his
life, traveling from ranch to ranch, farm to farm all
across the country, doing whatever needed to be
done, searching for something he couldn’t name.
He’d finally found it with Bryson and Jared. Love
and acceptance with two gorgeous men, and a
home worth staying and fighting for.
He had money stashed from the jobs he’d
worked since he was barely twelve years old. He
lived simple enough, never needing much in the
way of material possessions so long as he had a
roof over his head. He had skills with crops and
horses. He could wield a hammer with all the
precision of a master craftsman. He was a jack-of-
all-trades and king of quite a few.
Always thinking he’d follow the sun and
moon to wherever they led him next, the feeling of
peace that had settled inside him when he first laid
eyes on Jared, then on Bryson, told him he’d found
the home he’d never known he craved.
After sliding his hands from Bryson’s hips to
Jared’s, he eased the worn, soft denim down
Jared’s lower body. When it hung at Jared’s
thighs, Walt lifted his booted foot and wedged it
between Jared’s legs and pushed. The jeans fell to
the floor. His boxer briefs took the same trek. Then
Bryson was cupping a naked cock, and Walt was
holding on to naked hips. “It’s time to get busy.”
He bit at Jared’s neck, drawing a hiss from
the man. Good. He wasn’t about to let Jared act as
though he wasn’t affected by this. Before the sun
came over the eastern horizon, Jared would be
well fucked, well sucked, and sore as hell. He’d
also know that the three of them belonged together.
He wouldn’t be able to deny it any longer.
Walt slid his hand down the crease of Jared’s
ass and forced his fingers between the tightly
clenched cheeks. “Relax and let me in,” he
muttered into Jared’s hair. He thought Jared would
deny him by the way he tensed, but Walt was
patient, and along with the stroking of Jared’s cock
by Bryson, he stroked the tight ring of muscle
keeping him from being inside Jared the way they
all needed him to be. “You want this. I want this. I
want deep inside, J. Do you remember what that
felt like, having my dick in your hot ass, pushing
my way through your defenses until neither of us
could get away?”
“Ah fuck, man. Yeah.” Jared sucked air in
through his teeth, and Walt kept up a steady rub of
Jared’s crack from just under his balls to his hole
and back again. When he looked over Jared’s
shoulder to Bryson, he found his lover bent over
with the head of Jared’s cock between his lips.
“We should move this to the couch. Do it
right and proper,” Walt murmured. Bryson lifted
his head slowly, letting go of Jared’s crown, and
nodded.
“Not sure how proper or right the couch is,
but it’s at least the next best thing.”
Without removing his hand from Jared, Walt
and Bryson maneuvered Jared until he was bent
over one end of the couch. Bryson’s mouth was
once again attached to Jared’s for another kiss.
The first chance he had, Walt got to his knees
behind Jared, parted the man’s cheeks, and dove
in, tongue extended.
Jared bowed his back and thrust his hips
back. Walt rewarded Jared’s pleasure with a
pointed stab at Jared’s rosebud. They needed this,
all of them. They needed to physically, sexually let
go of everything and just exist in the decadence of
fucking. It made them whole, complete. Being
together was where home was for him and for his
lovers. Life worked fine separate or with only two
together, but the three of them… It was
indescribable and something Walt had never had
until meeting Jared and Bryson.
Jared’s moans, whether from the loud, sloppy
kiss he shared with Bryson or from the fact that
Walt’s tongue had forced itself inside Jared’s
channel, were loud and echoed throughout the
room. Light flickered from the television, but in the
middle of nowhere, nothing but snow filtered from
the local channels at this late hour. It cast their
shadows on the wall, naughty images of men doing
things others might find wrong but that the three of
them found very, very right.
Walt dragged his tongue and licked from the
underside of Jared’s dick down over his balls and
back across his asshole. Jared bucked and rubbed
his cock against the arm of the couch, impatient
and horny. Walt liked that. A lot. When Jared let
go, he really let go. It might only be during sex, but
the man couldn’t control himself or his needs when
it came right down to it. He’d learned that early
on. Jared would stay still, take what he was being
given, make minimal sounds and movements, but
there was a line, and when it was crossed, he
strained at the bit, hungry for release.
He and Bryson could use that to their
advantage in winning Jared over again. They could
tap into that hunger, keep the man so sexually
wound up that he wouldn’t be able to see straight
without them. Getting this close to him was easier
since he had a bit of alcohol in his blood and
definitely easier than either of them had imagined
it would be. Now that they had him here, though,
he wasn’t going to get away a second time.
Walt blew cool air over Jared’s hole and felt
it quiver when he touched it with the tip of his
finger. “You ready for more, J? You ready for me
to take you the rest of the way?” Walt was
unbuckling his belt and getting his jeans unfastened
before Jared could answer. Being ambidextrous
came in handy, more in some cases than others.
This would be one of those “more” times.
“Yeah.” Jared couldn’t keep his hips still,
pushing and pressing, looking for what would
make him whole. A dick in his ass. Walt’s or
Bryson’s, Walt knew right now it didn’t matter to
Jared, he was so hot for a fucking. Bryson being
there only made things hotter for all of them with
as much as Bryson liked watching.
“J, look at me. I need you to see me. I need
you to see that nothing has changed, that you’re
still mine, and I’m still yours.” Jared turned his
head and locked gazes with Bryson. “I need to see
your eyes when Walt takes you. You’re gorgeous
to me.” Bryson’s words, meant for Jared, touched
Walt too. The love the two of them shared was
incredible, and when Bryson quickly flicked his
gaze up at Walt, he saw the same desire meant for
him reflected in the depths.
Sexual hunger was all but palpable in the air
around them. Bryson needed to see Jared
surrender, and Walt wanted to give it to him. It got
Bryson off to watch, and it got Walt off making
both men happy and pushing them over the edge.
“Bry? I need the lube and condom,” Walt said
softly. He didn’t want to break the mood, didn’t
want to risk losing Jared in that moment, so he
rubbed his cockhead along Jared’s crack, smearing
precum all along the length. Jared’s mood didn’t
seem affected, though, when Bryson fumbled in his
pocket for the foil packet and pillow packs of lube
he’d grabbed at the cabin. They’d left Bryson’s
truck and driven to the main house in Jared’s,
which they’d brought back with them from the bar.
He kept one hand on Jared’s hip and ripped
open the purple foil with his teeth. He rolled the
rubber down his shaft. He opened the lube pillows
the same way, emptying one down over Jared’s
hole, making him hiss at the cold, and the other
over his own cock. He slicked himself up; the
friction of his hand warming his penis through the
latex hardened him further. His brain was ceasing
to function beyond wanting to get inside the tight
tunnel that was Jared’s ass.
When he was fully lubed up, he parted
Jared’s cheeks with both hands. The gel glistened,
and his hole winked as Jared squeezed and
released the tension from being so aroused. It was
the hottest fucking sight. “You should see this,
Bry,” he whispered.
Bryson crawled off the couch and stood
beside Jared. He leaned over Jared’s back,
looking down. He groaned and, “Goddamn,” came
out on a rusty croak. But it was when Bryson
lowered one of his hands between Jared’s cheeks
and rubbed the lube around and then worked his
finger inside Jared, little bit by little bit, that Walt
nearly lost it.
He was usually a master at control, especially
of his own sexual desires and emotions, but
watching Bryson prepare Jared was almost more
than Walt could stand. First one finger, in and out,
then a second one. Jared moaned, and the sound
was a little pained, but when Bryson started to
ease up, Jared begged him not to stop. Bryson,
ever the accommodating man, didn’t.
“I think he’s been fucking himself,” Walt said,
noting the ease with which Jared’s ass sucked
Bryson’s fingers in once the initial tension gave
way.
“I think so too. J’s never been one to deny his
ass pleasure, whether from fingers, toys, or cock.”
“The toys must’ve been getting a workout then
because the only cocks he wants inside him are
ours. Isn’t that right, Jared?”
“Fuck,” he breathed when Bryson started
working a third finger in. “Yeah. God, someone
fuck me. Please.” Bryson slid his fingers out and
crawled back in front of Jared, but not before Walt
leaned down and sucked on Bryson’s tongue in a
none too quiet kiss.
Walt stepped behind Jared and lined up the
tip of his cock with Jared’s entrance. “Has anyone
else been in this ass in the last three months?” He
knew the answer, but he wanted to hear the
admission.
“No.”
“Good. I like that you saved it for us.”
“Just fuck me, Walt.”
“Just fuck you? You’re better and worth more
than just a fucking, Jared,” Walt murmured softly.
He drove forward, stretching Jared a little at a
time, feeling pressure on his cockhead. “You’re
still so damn tight. You don’t know what it feels
like inside me to know I’m the only other man
who’s been with you like this.”
“Only you…and Bry.” Jared’s words were
measured as they came out, deep and meaningful.
Walt couldn’t see his eyes, but with the angle of
Jared’s head and the steady stare of Bryson’s gaze,
Jared had to be looking right at Bryson.
“Good. That’s the way it should be, the way it
should always be.” The head of his cock popped
through the last bit of muscled resistance, and then
his shaft was pressing in, going deep until he was
seated all the way to his balls inside Jared’s ass.
He sighed in bliss. “Ah, fuck yeah.” Being in
the depths of Jared’s body was one of the most
perfect places he’d ever been. It was tight, hot, and
molded around his dick as though made for his
cock. Only one other passage felt that way to him,
and that was Bryson’s. He’d never felt more
complete than when he was with these two men,
taking them, pleasuring them, holding them.
They might not realize it, especially Jared,
but from the moment Walt had walked in the door
the night Jared brought him to the ranch, Walt had
surrendered everything to them. He trusted his
instincts more than he trusted words or even
actions, and they’d never led him astray yet. They
were fair to screaming at him that these two
cowboys were the home and men meant for him.
He’d been plenty of places in the country, felt
comfort and welcome in varying stages, but
nothing like what he felt here with them.
He pulled out, teased Jared’s opening with
his cock, then thrust back in. He did this until the
slide back and forth was met with fluid ease.
Grunting as he bottomed out again and again, he
soon realized that the grunts weren’t only his.
Jared’s had joined in, and the smile of delight and
lust and love lighting Bryson’s face brought a
smile to Walt’s own lips.
Bryson was a voyeur. Walt had known that all
along, and truth be told, he’d missed putting on a
show for the man. Bry was often content to simply
watch Jared and Walt play or fuck. Early on,
Bryson had assured Walt and Jared that he didn’t
feel left out or forgotten, but that he got off just as
much watching as participating.
Walt had no problem complying with his
lover’s desires. Either lover.
“Come inside him, Walt,” Bryson pleaded. “I
want to watch him as you come.”
“How can I deny you?” The answer was, he
couldn’t. Jared’s body was relaxed and pliant,
taking the pounding Walt was giving him. Walt
held on to Jared at his hip bones, loving the way
his skin stretched taut over his frame. Jared was a
decent-sized man, and he was fit only in the way a
man who worked the land and horses could be.
There wasn’t an ounce of excess on any part of
Jared’s body, and Walt was all the more attracted
to him for it.
He held on to Jared tightly and rocked his
hips, riding Jared’s ass hard. Jared’s channel
clenched and released around Walt’s cock,
squeezing his shaft. Jared’s own cock was still
pressed against the arm of the couch, and Walt
hoped Jared wouldn’t come until Bryson could
catch the semen with his tongue. Then again, Walt
knew the sensations Jared’s cock must be
responding to, being rubbed by the rough tweed
fabric. The thought alone of how that would feel
made Walt’s mouth go dry.
It would feel amazing, friction city. Different
than the steaming hole he was plunging into.
Coarse hair on the back of Jared’s thighs and
ass rubbed against Walt. He’d never wanted the
smoothness of a woman, but he got off like crazy
on the hairiness of a man. Especially a well-built
cowboy.
He pressed forward, pushing Jared’s body
harder into the arm of the couch, and thrust hard,
skin slapping against skin, sweat building between
them. His balls drew up, full and heavy. He
slammed into Jared with every bit of power in his
lower body, and roared as he filled the condom
with a load of cum he’d been saving just for Jared.
He slumped over Jared’s back and kissed his
way up Jared’s spine to his neck and into the short,
brown hair at his nape. “I love you, J. Happy
birthday.”
Jared chuckled and pushed his head back into
Walt’s face. “I’d almost forgotten.”
“We hadn’t,” Bryson added. Walt looked
over Jared’s shoulder just in time to see Bryson
dive into Jared’s mouth for a kiss. The two men ate
at each other’s mouths, their hunger still evident.
“No, we sure hadn’t.” Walt stood, his cock
still buried in Jared, though it was starting to
soften. He raised a hand and lowered it quickly,
coming into contact with one of Jared’s ass cheeks.
“What the fuck, man?”
“A birthday spanking.”
“Ah hell no.”
“Ah hell yes.” And another smack landed.
“How old are you now? Thirty?”
Bryson kissed Jared’s shoulder and laid his
head on top of Jared’s. “He’s thirty-one.”
“Don’t you dare give me thirty-one spankings.
I’ll beat your ass when I get up from here.”
Two more smacks, one to each cheek. “Isn’t
that what I’m doing to you?” Three more and his
dick started to harden again. Neither Jared nor
Bryson ever failed to have that effect on him. Walt
had always been quick to recover, but with these
two men, it was even quicker.
Jared moaned and wiggled his behind into
Walt’s groin. Two hard slaps to Jared’s backside,
and he was humping the arm of the couch again.
“Is that how you’re gonna get off, J?”
Bryson laughed, though the question hadn't
been posed to him. “There is no getting off for me,
that's for sure. I got off all in my damn jeans
watching the two of you. Might even be doing it
again if you keep that up.”
“Oh shit.” Walt laughed too. He hadn’t
thought of that happening. “What about you,
Jared?” The pink of his ass was now turning a nice
shade of red. The sting would begin to turn tender,
and the need would swell…
“Yeah,” Jared ground out as yet another
barrage of spanks were delivered. Walt eased up,
tapping lightly on the reddened flesh. Jared took a
deep breath and moaned, his body quickening with
its thrusts against the couch. He shuddered and
cried out, his hands grappling at nothing, then at
Bryson, who held firmly on to his fingers.
“That’s so good, J.” Walt was hard but not
painfully so, even as the urge to orgasm again was
strong. He eased himself out and stripped the
condom off with one hand while with his other he
jerked himself with short, sure strokes. When he
came with a grunt, his cum splattered all over
Jared’s red, spanked ass. Red and white.
“Goddamn, that’s fuckin’ hot,” Bryson
whispered, his gaze riveted on the strings of
semen. Jared whimpered and lay still against the
couch. “You okay, J?”
“I think we need to get the mop out.” Jared
chuckled. It had been so long since Walt had heard
the sound, and it was like a balm to his soul. He’d
missed Jared, probably more than Jared would
ever be comfortable knowing about.
“I’ll take care of it,” Bryson offered. “Y’all
get into bed.”
The smile died on Jared’s face. Walt stood
off to the side to right his jeans and dispose of the
condom, but was caught by the change in Jared’s
countenance. He was stiff now, almost unyielding
in his facial expressions. It both pissed Walt off
and touched his heart. For every step forward they
seemed to make with Jared, he always found a way
to push them back where they started from.
“I don’t think y’all should stay,” Jared was
saying.
“Tough. We’re stayin’. Tonight and every
other night that follows. We’re done being
separated.”
“Bry, c’mon. I—”
Bryson hooked his hand around the back of
Jared’s neck and moved in for a hard kiss.
“Decision made. Stop being a jackass, J. We love
you. You love us. We’re gonna work this out.” The
two men stared at each other for a charged few
minutes. Jared’s eyes must have given something
away, because Bryson smiled and, after pressing
another kiss—this one to Jared’s forehead—let go.
“I’ll be to bed soon. Oh, and Jared? Walt will toss
you over his shoulder and carry you if you give
him any trouble between here and the bedroom.”
Jared turned wide eyes in Walt’s direction,
followed by a smirk of disbelief. He stood. “Right.
He can’t lift me, much less carry me through the
house.”
“You sayin’ he can’t? Is that a challenge?”
“Y’all ever think to ask me about this?” Walt
interjected, cautiously happy to see his lovers
having a good-natured disagreement. About him.
“I’m the one who just fucked our brains out. Now
you want me to be He-Man and carry the SOB
down the hall?”
“Sayin’ you can’t?”
Jared’s taunt hummed through the room.
“Definitely a challenge. I can take it.” He rushed
Jared, catching him off guard. Jared had a second
to yelp before Walt’s shoulder was in his gut and
he was thrown over.
Jared pounded him on the back. “Put me
down, you crazy-ass Indian.”
“Nope.” For emphasis, Walt turned his head
and took a hard nip of the swollen, freshly spanked
ass cheek nearest him. Bryson stepped up to the
other side and took a bite for himself. Jared
squirmed, and as the men kept at their biting,
which turned into sucking love bites, Jared’s
protests turned into moans. Bryson winked over
the narrow, muscled expanse of Jared’s ass at
Walt.
“Take the brat to bed and let me clean up his
mess.”
“Really, man I—” Jared started to protest but
was silenced with a smack on his upturned behind.
Walt stomped from the room with his prize.
“Hey, Walt? Jared just flipped me off.”
“I’ll give him something to do with that
finger,”
Walt
called,
dumping
Jared
unceremoniously in the middle of the king-size bed
in the master bedroom. Jared flipped him off too,
to which Walt only laughed and leaned down,
sucking said finger deep into his mouth until
Jared’s eyes rolled back in his head and he started
growing hard. Again. “Now,” Walt whispered
after letting Jared’s finger fall from his mouth, “I
suggest you pipe down with the attitude, or we’ll
make sure you do by wearing your ass out.”
“Promises, promises,” Jared quipped, though
without heat.
Walt nodded. “Damn right. Promises.”
Chapter Four
Jared woke slowly, sweaty and hard. His ass
hurt from the rough sex, his mouth ached from the
blowjobs, and his heart hurt from denying himself
and the two men in the bed with him a chance at
happiness. Walt was still sleeping, his back turned
to Jared, and one long, tan leg rested on top of the
blankets. Bryson was on Jared’s other side, his
arm draped across Jared’s stomach. They were
snuggled up close, and the only problem with their
situation was Jared’s need to piss.
He didn’t want to wake them, but he was
going to have to if he intended to get out and into
the bathroom. A shower wouldn’t be a bad idea
either. Bryson must have sensed Jared being
awake because he shifted and rolled over but
didn’t wake himself. Walt, on the other hand, was
staring at him with those black eyes that seemed to
see way the hell too much. When had he turned in
Jared’s direction? He guessed it was at the same
time Bryson had moved.
Jared didn’t say anything and hoped Walt
wouldn’t either. He crawled out from beneath the
covers and made his way to the foot of the bed.
When Walt didn’t get up and follow, Jared
breathed a sigh of relief. He turned the shower on,
and while the water heated, he eased the pressure
on his bladder, followed by hand washing and
brushing his teeth. It was something he’d always
done from the time he was a little kid. He realized
most waited until after breakfast to brush their
teeth, but he preferred doing it before. He liked the
feel of clean teeth, especially after a night like last
night.
“I like that you do that,” came Walt’s gruff
morning voice through the crack in the door. He
pushed it open when Jared looked up from the
sink, and their eyes met in the mirror. Jared spit the
toothpaste out and turned off the faucet.
“Thought you might’ve gone back to sleep,”
he said, trying to keep the hopefulness out of his
tone, after he wiped his mouth with the back of his
hand.
“Couldn’t.”
“Did you try?” Should he get in the shower?
Would Walt see it as an invitation? If they kept up
the conversation, Bryson would no doubt wake up
soon, and Jared wasn’t ready for that confrontation
yet. He turned and stepped into the shower stall,
hoping Walt would get the hint, but at the same
time, Jared knew the other part of that hint was
wanting Walt to join him, to touch him again.
The whole damn situation was a confusing
mess. He was in love with Bryson. He was in love
with Walt. He’d never given much thought to how
ménage relationships worked or if they ever did, in
fact, work. He sure as hell never thought he’d be in
the middle of one, and that knocked him off-kilter.
He always thought it would just be him and Bryson
together. The thought of someone else, the idea that
something
could
be
missing
from
their
relationship, had never entered his mind. He was a
simple man, but the place he found himself in, this
middle place, was anything but simple.
Cool air brushed against his backside as the
curtain was pushed aside and Walt got in behind
him. Jared kept up with the process of soaping his
hair and body as though he didn’t realize the other
man was there, made sure to keep his muscles
relaxed and the tension filling his gut out of his
stance. If he showed any kind of emotion or
physical change, Walt would pounce on him. Deep
down inside, Jared wanted that, but he still needed
space to try and figure out what he should do, how
he was going to handle everything.
“I did try to go back to sleep,” Walt said
finally.
“Must not have tried very hard or for very
long.” Jared rinsed himself and was proud that his
voice didn’t shake with the lust he was feeling in
every cell of his body. The rumbling chuckle from
behind did nothing to ease the need.
“Something is definitely hard, and no, it
wasn’t my effort to go back to sleep.”
Walt hadn’t touched him, but he might as well
have. Jared knew it was only a matter of time
before he gave in. Not only to sex in the shower
with Walt, but to his love for both men.
“This is insane, man.”
“What is?”
“Me. You. Bry. All of it. It’s insane. How do
three hardheaded men like us make it work?” Walt
did touch him then. One hand on Jared’s shoulder,
hotter than the water raining down on him. The
heat of Walt’s skin and the way it melted the
tension radiating through Jared had surprised him
since his first time with the man.
Love took time to take root in Jared and
Bryson, but it didn’t take more than a smoldering
heat in Walt’s eyes when he first looked at Jared,
for love to kick him in the gut enough that he felt it
down to his balls in a tight hitch. He tried to tell
himself it was nothing but lust he felt for the
handsome Indian. Though, the more looks passed
between them, the more they touched and talked,
Jared knew it was love. He couldn’t explain it, and
he didn’t want to. He just didn’t know how to keep
it.
“It takes work, J, just like any relationship
does.”
“It feels too perfect. When we’re all together,
it feels too perfect to last.” He started to turn as
Walt spun him around and backed him deeper
under the water. Walt advanced, and their mouths
met, force and need making Jared claw at the man.
Tongues slid and clashed, teeth met, lips
stretched wide, and if Jared could have climbed
inside Walt, he would have.
“It feels perfect because it’s right,” Walt
growled, spinning Jared to face the tile again. He
grabbed Jared’s waist and tugged. “Bend. Give me
your ass.”
Jared did it without hesitation, without any of
the attitude from the night before. He couldn’t fight
himself. Not right then and maybe not ever again.
Maybe Walt was right and maybe Bry had been
too. Jared didn’t know. He only knew he didn’t
want to be miserable anymore.
Water pounded on his back, melting the
muscles and easing the nerves along his spine.
Walt wedged himself up tight behind Jared and
slid his rock-hard penis through Jared’s crack and
thrust, pushing his pelvis at Jared’s ass. Hands on
the tile wall for balance, Jared could do nothing
more than take it, press back some, but the reality
was, the shower stall hadn’t been designed for
fucking. It was a real flaw that probably needed to
be remedied. The sooner, the better.
His balls ached, drawn up tight and full. His
cock ached, hard and throbbing with need. He
wanted to ask Walt to touch him, but there wasn’t
even enough room for that.
“I want in your ass. I want deep inside your
ass, but for now, I’ll settle for seeing my cum all
over your back, marking you. You’ll feel it and
know it, but I’ll see it…” Walt’s words trailed
away, and he picked up the speed of his thrusts,
driving his dick hard against Jared’s body.
When he came, it was with a grunt of satisfied
pleasure. Jared didn’t think it would be possible to
feel any further heat, but he did. The ropes of cum
against his back were hot, almost scalding, and
they trailed his skin as the water washed them
away. Walt’s cock pulsed, and Jared felt every
throb, every ejaculation of semen.
“So fuckin’ gorgeous, marked as mine,” he
gasped, slapping a hand on Jared’s ass, still bright
pink from the spanking last night. Jared
whimpered. It stung, oh fuck it stung, but his dick
didn’t care. “Oh? Like that?” Walt slapped his
other hand on Jared’s ass again, this time the
opposite side from the first.
Jared didn’t just like it; he loved it. Another
show of force from Walt. He’d seen it in the way
Walt and Bryson were together, but last night was
the first time he’d experienced it for himself alone.
“Do it again. Please.” Was that his voice? Were
those his words? He hadn’t even realized he was
going to say them until they were out, floating in
the air between them.
“Gladly.” And then Walt delivered. Large,
wet hands on his tingling, wet butt. Jared lost count
of the number of stinging swats Walt gave before
the shower curtain flew open and Bryson stood on
the other side, his hand slowly jacking his dick.
“Well, well, well. Starting without me, huh?”
There was no anger in the words, only an aroused
heat. “Nice shade of red again.”
“I think so,” Walt agreed, squeezing Jared’s
cheeks hard in his hands while leaning over to
share a kiss with Bryson. Jared saw it out of the
corner of his eye, and where last night he still
experienced twinges of jealousy when the two men
touched or kissed, he didn’t feel left out this
morning. He was their focus. He was the reason
they were there, in the house, in the shower. They
wanted him. Despite the way he’d treated them,
turned them away, they still wanted him.
“J’s cock is still hard,” Bry observed.
And dear God he was. Harder than he could
remember being in months.
“Yes. Saved it for you,” Walt panted.
Bry reached out and wrapped his hand around
the hardness in question. Walt stepped back as far
as he could, giving Jared room to turn and face
Bry. “Good. I didn’t get a good taste of it last
night. I need to rectify that now.” And he did.
Bry’s mouth closed around the head, his lips tight,
his cheeks sucking in.
Walt gripped the back of Jared’s head, and he
turned, meeting Walt’s lips for a kiss. Sex with the
men last night had been hot, but this…this was
something
different,
something
unplanned,
uncalculated. It’d been this way in the beginning
too, when Walt first came to stay with them at the
ranch.
Jared moaned around the tongue tracing the
cavern of his mouth and bucked his hips forward,
deeper into the mouth trying to suck his heart out
through his dick. Bry had never been graceful with
his cocksucking, but his enthusiasm had never left
anything to be desired. He loved cock and it
showed in how he touched it, sucked it, and fucked
with it.
Jared tried to pull away from Walt’s mouth.
He wanted to look down at Bryson. He wanted to
watch his dick disappear inside Bryson’s lips, see
them stretched wide around him. He wanted the
man he loved looking up at him.
Walt let his mouth go and lowered a hand to
the back of Bryson’s head. Walt guided Bry
forward until Jared’s cock touched the back of
Bry’s throat. Bry gagged, and Walt let up on the
pressure long enough for Bry to catch his breath,
then urged him closer again, several more times,
until his throat opened to take Jared’s length.
It
was
something
Jared
had
never
considered…Walt controlling more than just
himself or Jared, but Walt controlling Bry at times
too. The idea, the visual in front of him, the sheer
eroticism was sensory overload for Jared. Bryson
must have felt it as well because he lifted his gaze
to meet Jared’s.
“Come down his throat, J.” It was all Walt
said, and it was enough. Jared’s balls emptied
through the shaft of his penis. Bryson swallowed it
all down, drinking and sucking until Jared was
depleted and sagging against the solid weight of
Walt’s body.
Walt eased the pressure on Bryson’s head,
and no sooner had Bryson let Jared’s cock fall
from his lips, than Walt was there with his tongue
inside Bry’s mouth. They shared Jared’s taste
between them. If it had been possible for Jared to
come again, he sure as fuck would have.
When Walt stood, he helped Bryson stand as
well, and somehow the three of them moved
around enough that Bryson got into the now cold
shower, and they got out. The floor would need to
be mopped from all the water that had splashed
across it as they’d stood with the curtain open.
“Bry, I…I, uh…” Jared didn’t have the words
for what he wanted to say, what he was feeling
right then. Hell, he wasn’t even sure what he was
feeling. Love, desire, mental and physical
exhaustion. Everything was jumbled, tangled into
one big ball in his gut. Not that he hadn’t brought it
on himself. If he was honest, he would agree that
he’d been a horse’s ass throughout the last few
months, but he just wasn’t used to feeling so much
for not only Bryson, but for another man as well.
Bryson looked around the end of the shower
curtain and smiled. “I know, J. We’ll talk in a bit.”
Jared nodded and let Walt lead him from the
bathroom, towels in hand.
* * * *
“I never thought I’d love anyone else, and I
sure as hell never thought he’d love someone else,
the same someone else, either or too or, fuck, I
don’t know.“ Jared let out a frustrated sigh and
tipped his hat off his head. He slapped it against
his thigh. “This wasn’t how I thought life would
be.” He’d blurted out the words, catching Bryson
by surprise. Judging by the way Jared bit his lip
and screwed up his face, he was surprised he’d
said them too.
Feeling things was one thing; opening up and
verbalizing those feelings was another for Jared. It
was another trait he’d picked up from his father.
Men didn’t get all mushy and tell others how they
felt. Everyone was just supposed to know.
Talking made Jared feel vulnerable. He’d
admitted that years ago, one night when Bryson had
asked why Jared never said “I love you.” After
that, Jared had made a point to try and at least tell
Bry once in a while how he felt. Bryson missed
that, hearing Jared’s rough voice full of emotion on
those rare occasions.
“Life is rarely ever what we think it should or
would be,” Walt said from his seat on the porch
swing. It was probably as old as the house itself.
They’d reinforced it with newer, stronger chain,
replaced a few sagging boards, and added a new
coat of paint. Before Jared had pushed them away,
the three of them would sit on the porch late into
the night, sometimes talking, sometimes just easily
swinging back and forth. “I have a home and never
thought I would.”
Bryson met Jared’s gaze, and both men
looked at Walt, who looked back at them.
“What?”
“What do you mean you never thought you’d
have a home?” Bry asked.
Walt shrugged as if it weren't a big deal. “Just
never cared. Always been good with moving
around, not staying long in one place.”
“So what changed?”
“Met you two.” He shrugged again, his voice
matter-of-fact, as if that was a sufficient enough
answer.
Jared stuffed his hat back on his head and
leaned back against the porch railing. “Nothing
special about us.”
“Speak for yourself. I’ve always been pretty
damn special.”
“Yeah, but I wasn’t talking about that kind of
special.” Walt laughed at Jared’s comment, and
Bryson did too. It was good to be teased again
because he couldn’t remember the last time Jared
had done so. Surely before Walt arrived. “But
really,” Jared said, turning his attention back to
Walt, “what made you want this to be home?”
“I told you. The two of you. And it wasn’t a
conscious thing. It was a feeling.” Walt stood with
languid grace. He moved smoothly, long limbs,
lean frame. In five easy strides, he was standing in
front of Jared. He tipped Jared’s hat back with one
finger and looped his hands loosely behind Jared’s
neck.
Bryson moved until he was standing next to
the men. Looking at them, at the way they
complemented one another: one light and one dark,
one tall and one slightly less so, but both intense in
their feelings, both tense in their stance. It was no
surprise to Bryson that he loved Walt and Jared,
the same and different.
Walt had a control streak. Not a big one, but
it was there and always during sex. He was
protective, easygoing until crossed in the wrong
way, quiet and unassuming, yet full of stealth and
power.
And Jared? God. Jared was raw, in-your-face
power, giving 110 percent, and taking everything
you had to give him.
Bryson knew he was somewhere in the
middle, and he could see how they would all fit
together. Walt could see it too. Jared seemed to be
the only one who couldn’t.
“What about the two of us?” Jared asked, his
voice little more than a murmur of sound. Bryson
knew he was trying to understand, trying to put it
together in his head. Jared might be a hothead
sometimes, might go with his gut when he
shouldn’t, but at the same time Jared was also
incredibly logical, and he wanted this between
them to be logical, be something he could wrap his
brain around. Only thing was, relationships didn’t
always make that kind of sense.
“You’re really gonna make me spell it out for
you, huh?” Walt laughed and nipped at Jared’s
frowning mouth. “Fine. The way the two of you
are…you’re more solid and you fit together better
than any couple I’ve ever met. There’s real love
there. It’s deep and true. You didn’t just live in the
same house and share the same bed and work at the
same place. You made a home. You and Bryson,
together. I felt it in the way you looked at him that
first day you brought me here, and I felt it in the
way he looked at you. There’s something special,
and I knew it immediately. I wanted to be part of
it, not just on the outside looking in. I wanted to be
in the middle, be included. I never cared one way
or the other before that.”
“You tore us apart,” Jared lashed out,
belligerent, defiant.
“Jared,” Bryson interjected, the warning clear
in his voice.
Walt glanced Bryson’s way, then back at
Jared and shook his head. “I didn’t. You did. You
turned him away. You turned us away, remember?
Only you can right it again.”
“He’s right, J. You pushed me out and straight
into his arms. You pushed him out too. But our
long-term happiness isn’t going to happen without
you. You’ve got to know that.”
“And what if I wanted you to come back to
me and let him go?”
Bryson willed Walt to look at him, and when
the man did, Bry hoped he could see what he was
trying to do. He’d told Walt last night that giving
him up wasn’t an option, and he’d meant it, but for
Jared’s sake… Walt’s nod was miniscule and, to
the untrained eye, undetectable. Thankfully,
Bryson’s eye was trained just right. Bryson
nodded, having known the question would come. “I
won’t do it.”
Jared’s eyes darkened with hurt, and he tried
to push his way out of the hold Walt had on him,
but the other man wouldn’t budge. Bryson had to
smile at that. He was thankful that Walt’s
determination was as strong as his own.
“Then we’re done,” Jared returned hotly.
“Not by a long shot, babe.”
Jared opened his mouth, but nothing came out,
and he snapped it shut. He glared from Bryson to
Walt and back again. When he opened his mouth
again, Walt leaned in and kissed him. Bryson
grinned. Walt was as tired of Jared’s excuses and
fighting as he was.
It took a few seconds, but Jared soon joined
in on the kiss, raising his arms and clinging to
Walt. The clenching of his hands in Walt’s shirt
was testament to Jared’s desperation for
connection, his need to hold on to the man who
held him.
When the two men lifted their heads, tears
filled Jared’s eyes as he looked to Bryson, but it
wasn’t entirely because of sadness. The flush of
anger on his cheeks, the tight clench of his jaw told
a story of frustration. “I don’t know how to do
this.”
Bryon’s heart ached for Jared’s turmoil. The
sexual stimulation and constant being together
since last night forced Jared into the very
confrontations he liked to ignore, unless he knew
he could win. Bryson wasn’t giving up though,
because the more they could break through Jared’s
barriers, the better off they all would be.
“One step at a time,” Walt said with his lips
pressed to Jared’s temple.
Jared scoffed. “Right. One step at a time.
Why don’t you watch me step over there and into
the house?”
“Nah. I like you right where you are, and truth
of it is, you like it right where you are too.”
Bryson watched Jared fight with himself.
Tense. Stiff. Still. Muscle ticking in his jaw. Pulse
kicking in his throat. And finally…his puffed-up
bluster deflated, and he gave a short nod.
“This is fucked,” Jared muttered, not for the
first time. Bryson couldn’t argue with him. To most
people, their relationship, such as it was at the
moment, was fucked. There were a rare few who
would ever understand how they could love one
another equally. Different, for sure, but equal.
Jared let go of where he’d gripped the porch
railing behind him after the kiss he’d shared with
Walt and surprised Bryson by reaching out for him.
Bryson didn’t hesitate and grabbed for Jared’s
hand, letting the man pull him close. Walt made
room and lifted one arm from Jared’s neck to
circle Bryson’s waist. The three of them stood
together, cowboy hats falling off and scattering
around their booted feet.
To the naked eye, maybe they’d look as
though they were praying. He couldn’t be sure
exactly what they were doing other than being
together, trying to figure out what the next step
was. Jared had said the night before that sex
wasn’t going to solve everything, and he’d been
right. It was a good tool to start breaking down
barriers and making chinks in the walls Jared had
erected around himself, but it wouldn’t solve the
issue of his jealousy and insecurity.
Bryson buried his face in Jared’s neck and
was rewarded with a soft moan and the rub of
Jared’s cheek against his hair.
Jared cleared his throat. “I’m sure the horses
are wondering what’s keeping y’all from ’em, and
I have some fencing to fix in the north pasture.”
“Something going on out there?” Walt’s tone
was all business. He didn’t own any part of the
ranch, but he treated it as sacred, cared for it as
much as Bryson and Jared did. It was Walt’s home
too, as far as Bryson was concerned. When Jared
brought Walt home, he’d given the big Indian far
more than any of them realized. Walt fit and
belonged, not only with them as lovers, but with
the land and animals too. It was damn hard work,
but they all found it rewarding. It was theirs. It
belonged to all of them, and Walt, with his travels
and knowledge, had made his own contributions
over the last few months, from streamlining the
way the hands worked their shifts to the
procurement of the new horses in the south pasture.
The stables being built out there were world-class
and would make it easier to house the horses,
rather than having to move them between the main
stables and the patch of land they seemed to love
roaming. Bryson couldn’t imagine a better partner
for the ranch or for himself and Jared.
“No, nothing going on. I think it’s more the
heaviness of the snow than anything. I was out
there yesterday, and that’s all it looked like. I’ll
take the Deere and get it fixed.”
“Need help?” Bryson asked, doing a crappy
job of keeping the plea from his voice. He’d
missed working side by side with Jared. He lifted
his head from where it had been resting on Jared’s
shoulder to look him in the face.
Jared didn’t answer for a long moment.
“Yeah, that’d be great.”
“Well, sure. I can handle the horses all by my
lonesome,” Walt interjected, a laugh in his
sarcastic tone of voice.
“I have faith in ya,” Bryson returned, leaning
in for a kiss. Walt chuckled and obliged him.
Bryson could still taste Jared on Walt’s lips, and it
warmed him deep inside.
“It won’t take me long. Just need to make sure
they’re all right and still getting along. Those three
new ones we brought in were a little skittish.”
“I didn’t know that. One of you shoulda told
me.”
“Walt’s got it. It’s what we hired him for.”
“I know, but you still shoulda told me,” Jared
said grudgingly.
“Look, let’s get the work done and meet up
for some lunch,” Bryson offered into the silence
that followed Jared’s last words. They all needed
to take a breather, focus on something else for a
little bit until Jared could cool down again. He
was so close to letting go and giving in to what
they all wanted. Maybe with a little time alone
together, he could get some answers.
Walt touched his lips to Jared’s before
stepping back and letting go. Jared nodded and
settled his hat firmly on his head again and walked
into the house without a word.
“We gonna get through to him?” Walt asked,
leaning against the porch railing where Jared had
been.
“Yeah. Right now he’s just frustrated with
himself more than anything.” Sometimes Bryson
forgot that Walt didn’t know Jared well, but
Bryson did. He knew Jared as well as he knew
himself and he could see the cracks forming in the
walls that Jared had put up. “Trust me. He’ll stop
fighting himself.”
“Will he stop fighting us?”
“That’s the thing. He’s not fighting us. It’s
himself and his own issues. He just has to know
we’ll be there to catch him.”
Walt nodded. “Okay. Well, try not to hit him
with the hammer when he gets on your nerves.”
Bryson laughed. “The hammer isn’t what I’ll
nail him with.” Jared came out of the house right
then, and Bryson did his best to school his
features. Jared was still insecure, and it wouldn’t
make things any easier if he thought they were
laughing at him.
They still needed to break through those final
bits of control Jared held on to. Bryson gave it
until nightfall.
“You still thinkin’ to hire some hands in the
spring?”
“If I’m still here, yeah.”
“You’re not going anywhere, J. You never
were, so stop actin’ like you’ve got one foot out
the door.”
Jared chewed on the inside of his cheek and
swore a blue streak under his breath. “Don’t you
ever get tired of being right?”
“Not really. Maybe if you weren’t so easy to
read,” he suggested. “You would never leave the
ranch unless you were dragged through the gate
kicking and screaming.” Even then, Jared would
likely have to be shot as soon as he was across the
property line or he’d try crawling back through. It
was his stubborn nature that made him who he was
and part of why Bryson adored him. “You love this
place as much as you love me and Walt. All of it,
all of us are in your blood. We’re not leaving you
or letting you go, so you better wrap your head
around it.”
“Why are you so mushy?”
“Mushy?”
“Yeah, you’ve gotten mushy lately, and it
really isn’t a good look on you.”
“Am I wrong?”
“You’re mushy.”
“Fine. I’m mushy. But am I wrong?”
Jared looked away, and Bryson followed the
direction of his gaze. There was something about
the mountains surrounding the piece of land he and
Jared had bought that settled inside them both. It
was home, and it was peace. It meant no running
from anything or anyone, including each other and
the love they shared.
If Bry had ever believed in dreams coming
true, he believed in them the moment he first saw
the place and the look of unfathomable happiness
on Jared’s face.
As for the part about love…? Yeah, there was
no debate there either. He knew Jared’s heart as
well as he knew his own. Jared couldn’t fight it
any more than he could deny it. Only problem was
he kept denying it and fighting it, and all it was
doing was pissing Bryson off and making him more
determined than ever to break through Jared’s
reserves. Besides, Bryson knew if the situation
was reversed, there was nothing Jared wouldn’t do
to get through to him or Walt.
“Why is it so important to you that I give in,
Bry?”
“Are you serious?”
“Yeah. You’ve got Walt. You—”
“God, J,” Bryson said, exasperated. “I love
you. Always have. You know that, and I can’t live
without you. I can’t believe you don’t fuckin’ know
that.”
“You seem to be living just fine without me.”
“You stubborn, muleheaded horse’s ass. Do
you see me first thing in the morning? Do you see
me last thing at night? Do you see me staring off
into space because a part of my soul is missing
since you turned me away? No, you don’t. But that
doesn’t mean it isn’t what happens.” Jared stared
at him with wide eyes, confusion, need, hunger,
love swirling in the depths.
“Bry, I…”
“No, it’s time you listen, Jared. I love you.
Forever. It’s part of me. You are part of me. I want
everything with you.”
“And Walt.”
Bryson sighed heavily. “Yes, and Walt.”
Jared nodded and bit down on the inside of
his cheek again. It was his tell. Bryson had seen
him do the same thing for so many years. It meant
he was thinking; he was contemplating; he was
pondering.
“Don’t deny you want him just as much. Don’t
try to lie to me about how you feel about him.”
“No.” Jared shook his head, and the tightness
in his muscles eased. Bryson saw the change
immediately. “No, I’m not going to deny it.”
“It makes you miserable.”
“Not miserable exactly. I—”
“Then it makes you uncomfortable, to want
him as much as you do.”
“Something like that, I guess.”
“And it makes you just as uncomfortable for
me to want him.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s proof that I can lose you.” His
voice was soft, lost. Jared was torturing himself,
and it hurt Bryson’s heart to witness it. Jared had
done the very same thing, briefly, years before
when they’d first left his parents’ ranch. He’d
wondered and asked when Bryson was going back
home, when he would be leaving Jared on his own.
It took some months, but Bryson was finally able to
convince Jared that he wasn’t going anywhere.
That when he’d said where Jared went, Bryson
went too, he’d meant it. It looked like he needed to
do some convincing again.
“It’s nothing of the sort, J. You can’t lose
me.” He took Jared by the shoulders and shook
him, willing him with touch and voice and sight to
believe him. “Ever.”
“But on the porch you said you wouldn’t let
go of him.”
Bryson nodded. “I did.”
“I’ve never been as good as you are at
handling all this.”
“All what? Emotion? Feelings? Yeah, I know,
but I kind of thought you’d try, instead of taking the
easy way out. You felt threatened; I get that.
Instead of throwing me out, you should have talked
to me or thrown a punch at least.”
“Easy? You think it was easy for me to walk
away? You think it was easy for me to know you
were with him every night and not with me where
you belong? And”—he rubbed at his face—“as I
recall from the soreness in my jaw, you’re the one
who’s taken up punching.”
Bryson smiled at the temper rising in Jared’s
voice. “At least you admit we still belong
together.”
“Of course we still belong together!” Jared
yelled.
“Well it’s about goddamn time.” Bryson’s
smile turned into a full-fledged, ear-to-ear grin,
and he pulled Jared’s mouth to his for a kiss. It
was scorching, tongue twisting, tongue sucking,
and soul searing. Bryson grappled at Jared, and
Jared clung to Bryson. When they came up for air,
only because they had to, both were breathing
heavily. Bryson bent over, hands on his knees.
“So, where do we go from here?” Jared
asked, his own breath coming short and labored.
Bryson stood up and looked his lover in the eyes.
They weren’t as cold and hard as they had been.
No, they were warm, heated with lust and need.
“You let us back in,” Bryson said softly. He
gazed intently at Jared, waiting, watching. Jared
nodded tightly and ground his jaw until the familiar
tic appeared. “Tell me you don’t want it. Tell me
you don’t want me on one side and Walt on the
other, all of us naked. Tell me you don’t want us to
all be together.”
Jared looked at him, long and intense. Bryson
stared him down. He couldn’t help but wonder
which one of them would blink first. It was usually
Jared, but this was far more important than their
staring contests over football, whose horse was
faster, who could drink whom under the table, or
who could maintain an erection the longest through
oral sex. This was their happiness, their lives.
The three of them.
“You’re not going to win this time, J.”
“I am. My mama didn’t say I was pigheaded
for nothing when I was growin’ up.”
“She definitely had you pegged right,” Bryson
agreed, brimming with confidence. “I’ll be
winning this time, though. You have a fence to fix.”
“It can wait a bit longer.”
“Can it?”
Jared dug his heels in. “Yep.”
“Can you?”
“Can I what?”
“Wait a bit longer?”
Jared looked to Bryson. “For what?”
Bryson stepped closer. The air mixed and
mingled between them. “For me to get inside you.
For me to push in deep and ride you like a buckin’
bronc.” He stepped one inch closer, and their
noses nearly touched. If he stuck his tongue out, he
could touch the tip to Jared’s lips. “For Walt to
slide his dick down your throat. For us to take you,
to own you, to keep you between us.”
“You don’t play fair,” Jared muttered.
“All’s fair in love and war.”
“Are we at war?”
“Making up might be fun, but I prefer love.”
“Are you still in love with me, Bryson?” The
way Jared’s lips quirked up made Bryson’s
stomach quiver. The man drove him absolutely
bananas sometimes.
“For all my life.”
“Then kiss me.” The words were said so
softly Bryson wasn’t sure he heard them correctly,
but then Jared’s lips were on his, and he forgot
everything else. He tasted of coffee and clean air
and his own very special flavor.
Their tongues slid against one another, and
then Jared’s gloved hands were cradling Bryson’s
face. The leather was soft and supple. They’d been
worn for years, were Jared’s favorite pair, a gift
from Bryson their first Christmas in Montana.
Jared grabbed hold of Bryson’s bottom lip
with his teeth and tugged, pulling a moan from
Bryson’s throat. Bryson’s hands gripped the belt
loops of Jared’s jeans and urged him closer. Their
cocks rubbed together through their pants. Jared
lifted his head away, and his eyes were already
open by the time Bryson opened his. “You lose,”
Jared whispered.
Bryson smiled. “But I win you.”
“Nuh-uh. ’Cause you never lost me, Bry. I
might be a stubborn cuss, but I am always yours.”
“Always?”
“Past. Present. And future. Always.”
“You’re right, then. You are a stubborn cuss,
because while in my heart of hearts I didn’t
believe I’d lost you, my head played some serious
games with me.”
“Are we having another spar with words?”
“Do we need one, J? You looking to be flat
on your back on the losing end?”
“Oh, I think you do. The first was loads of
fun.”
Both men looked over to see Walt sitting atop
one of their newest horses. The two, animal and
master, looked incredibly happy with themselves.
Bryson didn't glance at Jared, but out of the
corner of his eye, he spied a very rare sight, one he
had glimpsed only briefly last night, and not at all
for the last few months. A smile. A genuine smile.
Chapter Five
Jared slid his arms around Bryson’s waist
and held him close and tight. Something had started
cracking inside him when he and Bryson were
quarreling with words last night, but that something
kept right on fracturing, and soon all that hardness
was going to fall away and he would be a
vulnerable mess again. Bickering and squaring off
with words was what they’d always done to settle
disputes
and
arguments.
It
was
familiar,
comfortable, and it warmed him. The kiss hadn’t
hurt either.
And while a day, a week, a month ago, he
might have been annoyed at Walt showing up, that
something cracking inside his chest extended to
Walt as well. Jared’s hold on Bryson could be, or
might be, construed as possessive. It wasn’t what
he was feeling, though.
He was hungry, needy, wanting exactly what
Bryson had suggested he wanted. To be between
them, one in each of his holes, filling him, and
surrounding him with their heat and lust and
touches. He wanted them, wanted their love, and at
least in his head, he could admit it.
But the last time he’d come clean about
something, the last time he’d admitted how he felt
about something, his father had decked him and
called him every vile name not mentioned in the
good book. He was a little gun-shy in the
admission department.
“It’s a little cold out here to play. Maybe
want to get the work done and then venture
inside?”
The way Walt said the word “inside” set off
every nerve ending from Jared’s brain to the soles
of his feet. He wanted to bend over the middle
railing of the pasture fence, putting himself into
position for one man in front and one behind.
It might be cold out, but his cock was hard as
stone.
“Maybe if you get off your high horse and
help out, it’ll get done faster.”
“High horse?” Walt slowly dismounted. “My
high horse?” His boots crunched on the snow and
dead grass as he made his way, steady and sure,
toward them. Bryson smirked, but Jared wasn’t
sure how to take the look on Walt’s face. The
closer he got, though, the more a smile broke out
across his lips. Walt made a lunge at Bryson, but
Bryson ducked out of Jared’s embrace and spun
away.
When Walt caught up to him, Bryson was
ready with… A snowball? Jared blinked. The
snowball landed square in Walt’s stoic face. He
wasn’t smiling anymore. No, he looked fit to be
tied.
Another snowball flew, this time hitting Jared
smack in the face. What the hell? He wiped the ice
crystals from his eyes and cheeks just in time to
see Walt tackle Bryson to the ground. The men
laughed and wrestled, both losing footing and
falling.
Jared just stood back and watched, unfamiliar
feelings welling up inside. Lightness. Fun. He’d
never really associated either with himself and
definitely not with Walt, but his lovers—and yes,
they were his lovers—looked to be having so
much fun rolling around in the snow and ice, and
mud found underneath.
If he just let go and stayed in the moment, he
felt like a completely different person. He wasn’t
so serious or so much in his own way. He liked
this feeling, this energy, and this desire to be part
of something bigger than his fears. It was how he’d
been before that blasted dream so many months
ago. He wanted out of his self-imposed exile and
back in the warmth and decadence of male arms
and hot, dirty sex.
For the moment, though… “Uh, how exactly is
this getting the work on the fence done?” he asked
when there was a lull in the laughter and he thought
he might be heard. Both men looked over at him,
their smiles falling, and for a moment, Jared felt
bad about intruding on the fun when he’d rather be
joining in. He hoped there would be time for it
later. After the work. It was the one positive his
father had taught him. Work before pleasure,
because then pleasure could be enjoyed freely and
without rush or guilt over things undone.
“You know, he’s right.”
“Yeah. He is. This really isn’t getting any
work done.”
“No, it’s not.”
“We should do something about it.”
“I agree.”
Walt stood first, then lowered a hand down to
Bryson and helped him stand. They brushed their
clothes off, but they were already soaked through.
Walt took a step toward the four-wheeler Jared
and Bryson had ridden out on, but at the last
moment, detoured and made a move toward Jared.
He had Jared flat on his back before he could catch
his next breath.
The cold from the ground and the force of the
impact took the following breath too. Bryson was
on Walt’s back, working to pull him off Jared, but
all he succeeded in doing was tangling them all
together, as Walt’s hold on Jared was unforgiving
in its strength.
“Two against one is totally unfair,” Jared
huffed out, a grin breaking across his face.
“Maybe,” Bryson conceded. “I was trying to
help though.”
“Help who?”
Bryson pretended to think about it, but just
grinned. “You, at first, but…” He casually lifted a
shoulder. “I guess you could say it's now two
against one.”
“Figures.”
“Fun though, yes?”
Jared rolled from beneath Walt, his hand
under his ass a conscious move. His fingers
gathered snow, and he tilted to the side, back
toward the big Native American. Their lips met in
a searing kiss, one hot enough it should have
melted the ground beneath them, but then Walt’s
lips were gone, a hiss issuing from them. Jared’s
hand was empty of the snow because he’d worked
it inside Walt’s jeans.
Bryson was kneeling off to the side, laughing.
“Think it’s funny, huh?” Walt growled, trying
to get the ice from inside his pants. It dropped out
from the bottom of his jeans. He reached his hand
down the front and scooped out a rather large
chunk of snow, which he promptly threw at
Bryson.
But then, when he turned that look on Jared,
Jared didn’t know whether to run or stand his
ground. Revenge was written all through Walt’s
eyes. A wicked tilt to his lips made Jared think of
very naughty acts, and suddenly, though the play in
the snow was fun, he couldn’t wait to get back in
the house.
“I’ll be getting you for that, cowboy,” Walt
said, promises and threats threaded through each
word.
“I’m counting on it,” Jared replied. He found
he meant it too. He couldn’t think of anything he
wanted more in that moment other than for Walt to
get him back, for Walt to punish him in some way
for having played dirty enough to let loose a
snowball over Walt’s cock and balls.
“Damn. I think we’d better get some work
done before the mood changes around here,”
Bryson summed up, getting to his feet and doing his
best to dust off. It didn’t work, of course, as the
wetness had already soaked through his jeans, just
as it had Walt’s and Jared’s.
He was right too. Jared didn’t want the mood
to change, and it didn’t. The three of them worked
side by side to get the fence repaired. Jared used
the drill for wood screws and the nail gun as
reinforcement. They laid lengths of two-by-fours
against the posts and secured them. It wasn’t hard
work, but it was good, better than it would have
been had Jared been doing it alone, as he’d done
for the last few months. It really was no wonder
that sections of fence he’d repaired had come
undone. It was, at best, a two-man job, but three
was even better.
If they worked this well together at something
as mundane and simple as repairs, could they work
just as well as lovers, as friends, as mates? Could
they split the housework and it not turn into World
War III? Could they make dinner and do dishes and
live together without getting on one another’s
nerves? He knew he and Bryson could do it,
because they had for years, but could they with
Walt? Could he, with Walt?
He knew the answers to those questions. They
had worked well together. All of them. Starting the
day after Walt joined them on the ranch.
The night Jared brought Walt home, Walt had
stayed in one of the guest rooms before moving
into the master bedroom with Jared and Bryson.
They had all moved effortlessly around each other
and together. He’d wanted Walt in their bed and
entrenched in their lives as much as Bryson had. It
had never seemed that they were entering into
anything they hadn’t wanted all along. In fact, it
simply seemed that he and Bryson had been
waiting for the other part of themselves to arrive.
That part was Walt.
Jared looked to his right where Bryson was
working with a section of wire fencing. The cold
and play and arousal had combined to turn his
cheeks a deep shade of red. His cock was hard
behind his zipper, and his teeth gnawed a small bit
of his bottom lip. To his left, Walt secured another
section of wire fencing. For every one section of
wooden fencing, there were two sections of
chicken-wire fencing. It was something Jared and
Bryson had come across on another ranch they’d
looked at before buying this one. It was effective
as well as nice looking. They didn’t have cattle,
but they had horses that grazed in this part of the
property.
Walt’s naturally darker, tan-colored skin was
even ruddy from the cold and his own arousal. The
man had let go of his usually serious hold to play
and goof off, which further loosened that tightness
in Jared’s chest. The household couldn’t handle
two brooding men, even if one was more alpha
than the other, but that Walt could let go and have
fun meant that maybe there was hope for Jared.
Something about that eased him and gave him the
freedom to think that they could make things work.
Walt said it took one step at a time to make a
relationship like theirs work. Jared knew that from
all the years spent building the one he had with
Bryson. Walt was the one who’d never had a
serious relationship before, but at times it
appeared he knew more about how they worked
than Jared did.
He had a lot to learn, but he didn’t want to
learn with or from any other man or men than the
two who worked side by side with him. The land
they resided on was home, and Jared had felt it all
the way to his bones the moment they’d set foot on
it. When he, Bryson, and Walt were all together in
the same room that first night, that same feeling had
crept through him. They were supposed to be
three.
Thinking about it that way, going back that far
in his mind to those first moments, eased Jared. He
lowered his gaze to find that Walt’s cock was still
hard, despite the ice having been dumped on it.
“Daydreaming?” Bryson whispered, his
breath hot on Jared’s neck. Jared hadn’t heard him
walk up, hadn’t heard anything beyond the blood
thrumming in his ears as he stared at Walt and let
memory lane take him.
“Yeah,” he admitted. There was no use hiding
it now. He had let his guard down, and he was in
the process of trying to come to terms with wanting
everything he’d first imagined when finding Walt
walking along the side of the road looking for a
ride and for work.
Jared had wanted him, had wanted him with
Bryson, had wanted him with them both. He’d
screwed up, all because of what he was beginning
to think of as a nightmare rather than a dream. It'd
haunted him until his worst fears had come to life.
Him being alone. It was sudden, the need and
hunger for another man, and while he thought he
could handle his own attraction to Walt, seeing
Bryson wanting the other man just as much really
fucked with his head and drove him crazy.
It hadn’t been fair that he’d thrown them out
without, at the very least, giving them an
explanation. He hadn’t been fair by giving the
impression that what was good for him to do
wasn’t good for Bryson. He’d lost months with
both men by giving in to his insecurities, but he
aimed to make up for it.
Apologies weren’t his strong suit. He figured
that was as good a place as any to start. Healing
had to come, and he had to admit he’d been an ass.
“I’m sorry,” he blurted.
“For what?”
“Everything. All of it. I shouldn’t have gotten
so nuts about what I saw developing between you
and Walt.” At the sound of his name, Walt looked
over at Bryson and Jared with questions in his
eyes, and his brow scrunched in confusion.
“It wasn’t any different than what was
happening between you and Walt,” Bryson
reasoned.
Jared hung his head. “I know. Why was it so
easy for you to accept?”
Bryson shrugged. “Who said it was easy?”
“It wasn’t?” Now Jared was the confused
one. “You never acted like it bothered you.”
“No, I didn’t. Why would I? I’m in love with
you. I trust you. I have always trusted you, J.
Nothing and no one could ever come between what
we have. Not even Walt.” Bryson laid his hands on
Jared’s shoulders and squeezed. “Look, you and
me? We grew up together. We knew each other’s
secrets, each other’s dreams. Our bond was
formed long ago. Walt? He made that bond
stronger, at least for me. I knew he’d never take
you away from me. I wouldn’t let him, and I’d
never let you go without a fight. I don’t know what
suddenly happened that made you think we, you
and me, were better off apart. You’ve never said,
even though I’ve asked. I wish you would trust me
with it, let me help, at least let me in on it so I can
try to understand instead of wanting to kick your
butt all the time.”
“It was a dream,” he blurted.
“What?”
“A dream.” Now that he’d opened his mouth,
it sounded dumb to his own ears. Could he really
tell them the truth? Bryson looked confused, as did
Walt, and really, Jared couldn’t blame them.
“What was a dream? I don’t follow, J.”
“I had a dream one night. I don’t know what
started it. I just know I woke up in the middle of
the night with my heart thundering in my chest, a
cold sweat all over me, and I couldn’t shake this
feeling of dread.”
“You tried throwing what we all had away
because of a dream?” Walt asked in disbelief.
Jared looked at him. “I know how it sounds,
okay? I tried to forget it and ignore it, but it just
stayed with me.”
“What happened in it? Did something happen
to us?” Bryson was trying to understand. Jared
could tell by the tone of his voice and earnest look
on his face. Hell, even Jared was still trying to
understand.
“The odd thing is, I don’t even remember the
dream itself, just how I felt when I woke up. Every
time I saw y’all together, I had that same feeling of
dread, only it grew into jealousy and fear. I thought
I had to strike first. To keep from…” He ground
his teeth together until his jaw started to ache. “I
didn’t want to be left or kicked out or rejected
again. I know it’s not macho, but it’s how I felt. If I
didn’t make the first move–”
“If you didn’t make the first move, what?”
Walt interrupted. “No one was going to leave you.
No one was going to throw you out. No one was
going to do anything other than love you and screw
you five ways to Sunday. Which, by the way, is
still going to happen, make no mistake about that. I
just can’t fucking believe you let a goddamn dream
that you don’t even remember get in the way of us.
That is the most absurd and… God, Jared…”
Walt was steaming mad, and Jared didn’t
blame him. As he said the words, trying to explain,
it just sounded more and more awful and stupid.
“You think I don’t know how it sounds? You think
I don’t know that it’s something I created out of a
sense of paranoia and some damn feeling I
couldn’t get rid of? Jesus. If I could take it back, I
would, but I don’t know how.”
“I don’t remember much of what was going
on three months ago,” Bryson said. “We were
busy, starting to get the place ready for this winter.
We… Wait a second, you heard from your mother,
J. She told you about your brothers finally taking
over the ranch and that your father had all but
retired. She told you he cut you out of the will.
Things changed for us around here pretty quickly
after that. That’s got to be what triggered it, J.”
“I remember her calling and telling me that,
but I didn’t care. I told her it was fine, and I
wished… I mean, I didn’t expect to be in the will
anyway after I left, so I wasn’t upset about it. I
know she said she hoped things would change
between me and all them, but realized that it hadn’t
and wouldn’t. Did I really ruin our lives because
my father cut me out of his will?” He asked the
question more of himself than of the two men with
him. “I didn’t care that he cut me off or cut me out.
When I left, I never wanted to return, so why…?”
He lowered his head. “I can’t believe I fucked this
up. I can’t believe I let him, that I ruined—”
Bryson took Jared’s face in his hands and
lifted. “You didn’t ruin anything. I swear, you
didn’t. I wish you’d told us this sooner, though.
About the dream. I wish you had talked to us.”
“I’m so sorry, Bry.” Jared was so pissed at
himself.
He’d
let
something
completely
insignificant to his life with Bryson and Walt
nearly cost them everything. He looked toward
Walt, who appeared just as thunderous now as he
had a few minutes ago. No part of Jared’s
explanation or Bryson’s riddling out the missing
pieces had had any effect on him. “Walt, I…”
What could he say to the man?
“To the Sioux, dreams are important. Dreams
mean something. Maybe whatever you dreamed
was trying to tell you something. Maybe it was a
warning or a sign of trouble to come. I don’t know.
I have not been around my people in so long. I
would not know how to interpret it. And that I am
so angry at you for not even trying to talk to us, as
Bryson said… You took the man I love away from
me.”
Jared’s eyes widened. “What? The man you
love? You took him with you when you left the
house that night.”
“I’m talking about you, jackass.”
“Oh.” Jared didn’t know what else to say to
that. He felt so foolish already after what he had
said that he wasn’t sure there were any other
words that would appease Walt.
“Yeah. Oh.”
“You can’t keep things inside all the time, J.
You can’t keep everything to yourself. Not if this is
going to work. You have to open up.”
“Does that make me the girl?”
Bryson scrunched his brow in confusion
again. Jared wanted to soothe the wrinkles that
weren’t yet forming but would quickly if Bryson
had to keep doing that because of living with
Jared. “Does what make you the girl?”
Walt chuckled. “This I’ve got to hear,” Walt
said. Jared took advantage of Walt’s brightened
countenance and flipped him off.
“Being jealous. Insecure. Looking for trouble
where there is none.”
“You’ve done that kind of shit for as long as I
can remember. Your dad only ever added to it. He
was more destructive to you than supportive. You
go off half-cocked too.”
Jared scoffed a self-deprecating sound.
“Makes me sound real mature.” But he also knew
Bryson was right.
“I don’t mean to say that you aren’t. We just
handle things differently, and that’s what makes us
work. You’re the hothead, and I’m the calm one.”
Jared thought about that for a second and
realized that it was true. When he would let loose
his anger and pain and general pissiness, Bryson
would keep a cool head and reason everything out
for him. They had worked that way since they were
kids. If he’d just done what he'd always done, they
wouldn’t be in this particular mess of having to
rebuild.
“Well, if I’m the hothead, and you’re the calm
one, then what does that make Walt?”
“The fucking horny one,” Walt said,
emphasizing his words with a thrust of his hips
into Jared’s backside.
Bryson winked. “Good to know I’m not the
only one.”
* * * *
Walt kicked snow from his boots before
taking them off outside the back door of the house.
He set them on the mat on the porch before heading
inside. The afternoon temperature was dropping,
and another layer of snow was expected before
twilight.
He’d taken the horse down to the south
pasture and driven the truck back up to the house.
The silence of the land seeped into his soul, but it
wasn’t a lonely silence. It was different. It was a
peaceful, contented silence. It was what he’d
always searched for and hadn’t found until Jared
picked him up alongside the road.
Walt had been headed to the next small town
on the map, the next little dot, and had been happy
alone. Jared, though… One look at him and Walt
realized he’d never really known what happy felt
like.
The Southern-born, purebred cowboy was
hot, hard, and had the sexiest twang. Walt had
fallen hard from the first words out of Jared’s
mouth asking him if he needed a lift. He’d needed
and gotten one. The sexual attraction had been
instantaneous; the emotional attraction had soon
followed.
Bryson was a similar tale but slightly
different. The sexual was easier, softer; the
emotional, intense and powerful. He felt safe and
equal with Bryson. He felt protective and dominant
with Jared. In its own weird way, it worked for
them. When Jared let it, of course.
“Thought you’d have hit the shower already.”
Walt looked over his shoulder to see Bryson
coming from the direction of the barn. “Just
looking around. Why are you still out here?”
“Told Jared to go on and get cleaned up. I
made sure all was well with the horses up here
before the snow falls.”
“We’ll check on them again later.” Walt
tracked the easy swagger of Bryson’s gait. It was
smooth and seductive, even though the other man
either didn’t know it or didn’t care. It was sexy,
and if Walt hadn’t already been hard and on edge
from the earlier wrestle in the snow and the teasing
that followed, he’d sure as hell be hard now.
“Yeah. Jared said he’d take care of it.” Walt
nodded at Bryson’s words and pulled him into a
kiss as soon as he’d stepped up on the porch. His
tongue slid into Bry’s mouth, torturing them both,
stoking the fire. He and Bryson were primed and
ready to rut with the man inside the old farmhouse.
What they had planned wouldn’t be soft, tender
lovemaking. It would be a claiming, a reminder of
how good they were together.
He didn’t intend to leave again.
He nipped once more at Bryson’s tongue, then
his lips, before finally lifting his head. He slowly
opened his eyes and looked down at his lover.
“We broke through to him. Or rather, you broke
through.”
“You had it right the first time. We did it.”
Bryson slid his hands inside Walt’s coat.
“It makes you happy.” A statement, not a
question, and Walt watched Bryson closely.
“More than you can imagine.”
“Good.” Walt brushed Bryson’s hat off his
head to get an even better look at his eyes. Bryson
didn’t hide anything, couldn’t, especially when he
was looking directly at someone. He was too
honest to try to hide his feelings or his thoughts. “I
need you happy.”
“I am happy. He’s always been my whole
world. I’ve loved him forever and… Life, my life,
doesn’t work without him.”
Walt pulled Bryson close and held him tight.
He smiled when Bryson’s arms slipped around his
waist and tugged his shirt from inside his pants.
Bryson slid his hands upward until skin met skin.
He loved feeling the calluses and strength in
Bryson’s hands. “I know.”
“It doesn’t take away from you, though. I can’t
explain why or how that is. I just know it doesn’t
take away from what we’ve had these last months.
My life wouldn’t work without you, either.
Another man in our lives wasn’t anything we ever
planned or even talked about, but there you were
and you fit like a puzzle piece.”
“You don’t need to explain. I understand.”
And Walt did understand. He kissed the top of
Bryson’s head and laid his cheek against Bryson’s
damp, thick hair. “We are different, you and I, in
how we deal with each other. We are partners,
lovers. Who I am with you and who you are with
me… It’s different than how we are with Jared.
Not better or worse, just different.”
“We’re better as three,” Bryson murmured
into Walt’s chest.
“We are. He needs you as much as you need
him, and the both of you need me. It is the same
need I have for the two of you.”
“How could I not have realized, how could
he not have realized something was missing,
though?”
“Missing?” Walt saw a hint of confusion in
Bryson’s eyes. “What do you mean?
Bryson pulled the inside of his cheek between
his teeth and worried the skin for a moment before
answering. It was adorable and one of the
idiosyncrasies Walt loved about him. Jared did the
same thing, and Walt wondered idly if it was
something one had picked up from the other.
“What I mean, is Jared and I have been
together as friends all our lives. We’ve been
lovers for ten years, full-on partners in life and in
business. I don’t understand how we didn’t know,
how we didn’t realize there was something
missing. You. You were missing. How else do you
explain the fact that we both felt the completeness
when you came into our lives?”
Walt understood now. He’d seen many things
in his travels, met many people. He’d seen the best
and the downright worst. “I can’t explain it
anymore than you can. The two of you would have
been just as happy and content in your lives had
you not met me. Nothing was missing.”
“But if you left, we’d feel it. We’d feel the
emptiness.”
“Yes. As would I. I didn’t know anything was
missing either until I met Jared, and then you. In the
blink of an eye, I was ready to settle down, dig my
boots into the earth, and stay.” Walt placed his
hand over Bryson’s heart, felt it beating beneath
his palm through the chest wall, the flesh, and the
shirt Bryson wore. “You have my heart, and I have
yours. The three of us make a family. If I thought
for a moment you’d been wrong and that we
couldn’t make any headway with Jared, I’d have
left. It was never my intention to come between
you. You weren’t wrong, though. He loves you,
and he loves me. I know it. I see it just as you do.”
“Is it unfair to you? Any of it?”
“Unfair? No. The need between us is
heavenly.”
Bryson smirked and quirked a brow.
“Heavenly?”
Walt felt heat creep into his cheeks. “It was a
word my mother used when I was a child. She
would describe beauty and love as heavenly.”
“That’s the first time I’ve heard you mention
any family.”
“They are gone. My parents. Died on the
reservation when I was barely twelve. I had no
other family, and there was no reason for me to
stay.”
“You had friends, though, didn’t you?”
It took Walt a moment to gather his thoughts
and memories. It was hard for him sometimes. The
pain from so long ago had receded, but every now
and again, he’d feel the twinge of what it had been
like to have a family and lose them. “I had school
friends, but when my parents died, everyone
walked on eggshells, unsure what to say or do. I
already knew I liked males, and while many years
ago being gay was not a bad thing in our tribe…”
He shook his head. “Every culture has those who
do not welcome someone different than them or
different from how they think it should be. It
seemed no one knew what to do with me. One
night I packed up what I thought I could carry and
left.”
“I’m so sorry,” Bryson offered, his voice full
of sorrow.
“There is no need to be sorry, but thank you.
You and Jared are my family now.”
“Your very wicked and naughty family.”
Walt nipped hard at the tip of Bryson’s nose
and was rewarded with an aroused growl. “Yes.”
Bryson started to say something more, but Walt
shushed him. We are being watched , he mouthed.
His gaze found Jared’s dark, heated eyes. He was
looking at them through the screen door, soft light
filtering from behind him.
Jared smiled. “Starting the party without
me?”
“Wouldn’t dream of it. We were passing the
time.” Walt stepped back as Jared joined them on
the porch, shirtless, jeans unsnapped, barefoot. His
hair was still damp from the shower, and he
smelled like soap. Walt didn’t think he’d ever get
tired of the smell of a clean man or of a man who’d
just come in from working in the out-of-doors.
He was openly gay, never tried to hide it.
Lovers along the way had always satisfied him, but
nothing had prepared him for the utter satiety of
living with, working with, and waking up with
these two men.
“It’s damn cold out here,” Jared said with a
shiver. He wrapped his arms around his
midsection and tried to huddle in on himself. “We
should move inside and—” Walt cut Jared’s
suggestion off by pulling him close and covering
his mouth. His tongue slid between Jared’s lips
and was immediately sucked hard and deep. He
groaned and held Jared tighter, closer, feeling
Bryson’s hands on top of his. Moving inside the
house was not an option.
“We’ll keep you warm,” Bryson murmured.
Together they worked Jared’s jeans down,
and together they backed him against the wall. “I
think I’m the prisoner here,” Jared breathed,
excited and panting. His need was evidenced in the
heightened color of his cheeks, the pulse throbbing
in his neck, and in the impatient jut of his hips.
“Prisoner?” Bryson clucked his tongue. “No.
Not prisoner, though we can play that game
sometime soon if you’d like, but for now, think of
yourself as more the party favor.”
“P-party favor?” Jared stuttered, and Walt
tried not to smile. After all, he was working his
fingers between Jared’s thighs, stroking his balls,
urging Jared to spread a little wider.
Bryson trailed a finger up the length of
Jared’s cock, making him shudder. “Yes, you know
those little colorful paper horns people give out at
parties?”
“Oh God.”
“Mmmm. Yes, well, think of your dick as the
horn and that I intend to blow you for all you’re
worth.”
“D-dammit, Bry.” Jared gasped and thrust
forward, fitting his balls into Walt’s palm, which
Walt cradled and rolled. He smiled then at Jared’s
barely held on to control and slipped his hand free.
The plea for more wasn’t long in coming.
“Please,” Jared begged, whisper soft but with an
edge of hunger he couldn’t hold back.
“We will please you,” Walt said, beginning
to strip off his own clothes. Neither he nor Bryson
had showered yet. All three of them would need
one before darkness set in. The cold weather and
the promised snow would quicken their picnic on
the porch, but the urgency only fueled Walt’s own
lust. He was as hard as Jared, if not more so. He
was going to be sliding into Bryson’s hot, tight ass,
making Jared watch, making Jared come, making
Jared want the same thing. Of course, Bryson
would be helping by holding Jared deep in his
mouth.
Bryson worked his way between them and
pressed himself against Jared. “Still cold, baby?”
Jared moved in for a kiss. “Would be warmer
if you were naked. Body heat and all.”
“You know, he’s right,” Walt said from
behind Bryson as he slipped his arms around him.
Walt’s fingers unbuttoned the plaid shirt, followed
by the snap and zipper on Bryson’s jeans, and soon
Bryson was as naked as his lovers. Walt rubbed
his cock up the crack of Bryson’s ass, then down
between the back of Bryson’s thighs. He placed his
hands on the wall on either side of Jared’s head.
He pushed Bryson into Jared’s body with the force
of his own. “Is your cock rubbing against his, Bry?
Feel good?”
“Oh fuck yeah it does,” Bryson spoke into
Jared’s open mouth.
“Jared?”
“Yeah, man.” Jared’s breath was labored,
and Walt knew the man was hanging on by a thin
thread of self-control.
“Let’s get the party started,” he murmured
before burying his teeth in Bryson’s shoulder,
pulling a cry that was swallowed by Jared as he
kissed Bryson. Jared lifted his hands and framed
Bryson’s face, driving his tongue into Bryson’s
mouth. Fevered. Heated. Overcome with need.
That was how they needed Jared, how Walt
needed both his lovers. The needs of their bodies
taking over, pushing all else aside until the primal
side of their nature had been sated. He needed to
be that driving force for as long as they’d let him.
He took a few steps back and grabbed his
jeans to rummage in the pocket for the condom and
lube packet he’d stuffed inside when he went to
check on the new horses earlier. Wind was starting
to howl through the yard and between the
buildings. Snow clouds were gathering, and it
wouldn’t be too long now before flakes started to
fall.
He rolled the condom on as he watched his
two lovers kiss, as they rubbed their bodies
against each other. Pressed once again to Bryson’s
back, he rested his chin on his shoulder, then
nipped at his ear. “Time for you to get on your
knees, cowboy.”
Bryson immediately tugged his mouth away
from Jared’s with a moan and dropped to the porch
floor. Jared’s cock was in Bryson’s mouth before
Jared took his next breath. When he did, though, it
caught in his throat for a moment and then exhaled
on a curse. Walt smiled.
Jared’s nipples were hard, whether from
arousal or cold, Walt didn’t know, but it didn’t
matter. When he pinched one between his fingers,
Jared’s gaze flew to his, and Walt knew then and
there Jared belonged to him as much as he
belonged to Bryson. Something in the way Jared
stared at him, unblinking, unwavering, his eyes
clear but for the hunger floating through them. He’d
have done whatever Walt wanted right then. He’d
have surrendered to anything, given anything. It
was a heady and powerful feeling, and Walt
relished it.
“You understand now, don’t you? We’re all
in this together,” Walt whispered, pinching harder
on the nipple he held. He laid his other hand on top
of Bryson’s head and urged him to take more of
Jared into his mouth. He knew when Bryson had
complied, because Jared’s eyelids lowered and
his breathing grew even shallower. “There is no
more you against us or us against you. We’re
together. Do you get that now? There’s no
jealousy. No love lost. No more pain.” Walt
smirked after the last word left his lips, then
increased the pressure until Jared cried out and
bucked his hips away from the wall. “Okay, well,
maybe a little more pain.”
He let go of Jared’s nipple and leaned
forward to give the offended bud a lick before
dropping to one knee behind Bryson. He palmed
Bryson’s ass cheeks and spread them, his cock
aching to penetrate, to fill, to take. With a hand
fisted in Bryson’s hair, Walt pulled Bryson’s head
back, forcing his mouth to release Jared. “On your
knees,” he told Jared.
Jared dropped as quickly as Bryson had, and
without a word, Bryson lowered his hands to the
floor, lifted his ass in the air, and once again
engulfed Jared’s cock in his mouth. Walt moved in
very close behind Bryson and ripped the pillow
packet of lube open, squeezing the gel directly on
Bryson’s hole. He massaged it just inside but knew
Bryson was well used to his size and tempo. Walt
positioned his cock, ready, barely restrained.
“Jared, look. Look at me.”
Eyes nearly as dark as his own lifted and
locked with his. He wanted that connection
between them, that invisible bond across Bryson’s
body. He pressed forward, holding his cock steady
with one hand. Bryson tensed at Walt’s first push,
and Walt saw Jared’s shoulder muscles tighten in
reaction, but the moment Bryson relaxed, Jared did
too. Walt smiled to himself at the newfound
knowledge that the two men mirrored each other.
Inch by inch, Walt advanced until he was
seated deeply. His breath came in short huffs, and
the first snowflakes started to fall, blowing against
his skin from outside the porch. Walt pulled out,
pushed in, pulled out again. Jared’s eyes never left
his, only grew more dilated, more heated. His
mouth became slack, and arousal, pure and simple,
struck, from the mouth on his cock to watching
Bryson being fucked…
Bryson had been completely right. Walt and
Jared on their own would work fine. Bryson and
Walt, the same way. Jared and Bryson had always
worked too, but for the three of them to work,
Bryson had to be the middle, the link.
Walt drove his cock inside Bryson’s body
again and again, forcing Bryson’s mouth harder
onto Jared, and forcing Jared’s back into the wall
until he couldn’t hold on to anything but Bryson.
Jared grabbed for Bryson’s hair, his eyes full of
questions and needs. Walt nodded once, and Jared
took Bryson’s mouth in the same harsh way Walt
took Bryson’s ass. It was hard and unrelenting, the
double penetration, the feeling of the man between
them.
Bryson gasped for air when Jared would let
him catch his breath, but Walt held them steady.
Jared’s hips pumped in time with Walt’s as Walt
screwed his dick through Bryson’s tunnel. Sweat
slicked their bodies despite the winter weather
swirling across the yard.
“We belong to you, Jared, the same way you
belong to us.”
“I know,” Jared gasped, trying to catch his
breath.
“Then let go. You know you want to. Let go.
Let him have you.”
And he did.
Jared surged up on his knees and groaned, his
lips forming an odd mix of scream and smile. Walt
didn’t waste any time following suit. He plowed
the ass in front of him, filling the condom with his
cum. Jared sagged against the wall, and Bryson
softly sucked him clean as Walt draped himself
over Bryson’s back and placed a kiss directly
between his shoulder blades, the same way he’d
done with Jared earlier that morning in the shower.
“It’s colder than hell out here,” Jared
muttered. The sweat was starting to dry, and cold
began to penetrate the fog they’d been in.
“Yeah, we need to get inside.”
“I tried that earlier.”
“I wasn’t going to make it inside earlier.”
Walt slid out of Bryson’s ass and rested for a
moment before staggering to his feet. Bryson
carefully backed away and worked to steady
himself on his haunches.
“You think one of you might help a guy out. I
seem to be the only one left out of the good part of
the party.” His voice was good-natured despite the
fact his cock was an angry reddish purple at the
crown. He was hard, likely painfully so…
“Oh, I think one of us might be able to ease
your suffering.”
“I’d be mighty obliged.” Bryson struggled to
stand, and Walt tugged him into his arms with his
back against Walt’s chest. Jared pulled himself up
and stepped forward. He reached for Bryson’s
cock, wrapped his fist around it, and leaned over
Bryson’s shoulder to share a kiss with Walt.
Walt held Bryson tightly, kissed Jared hard,
and heard the cry of release when Bryson
orgasmed all over Jared’s hand. He knew it
wouldn’t take long, and he and Jared would owe it
to Bryson to treat him to a nice and slow
lovemaking session later.
“Damn, it’s fuckin’ cold out here,” Bryson
griped, shivering between his two lovers. Jared
and Walt both laughed.
“You just now figuring that out?”
Chapter Six
Walt finished his beer, set it on top of two
beer cans, starting the next row up, and settled
back into the couch cushions next to Jared. “You
ready to apologize yet?”
“I don’t know. How many beers have I had?”
Bryson made a show of counting the growing
beer can pyramid. “Well, the four on the left are
mine. The three on the right are Walt’s. That makes
the two in the middle yours. Two? Really? That’s
all you’ve had?”
Jared grinned at the two men flanking him. He
was sober and right where he belonged. Between
these two cowboys, in the house they should all
share for the rest of their lives. A couple of beers
didn’t get him drunk. A twelve-pack, yes. Two, not
anywhere close. “I’m not all that thirsty tonight.
And…” He took a deep breath. He wasn’t used to
being the up-front, vulnerable one. He hid behind
anger and bluster. “And I’m sorry.”
“For?” Walt prompted, leaning close against
his side. Jared glanced down and rolled his eyes.
They were going to make him say it, to both of
them. He wasn’t keen on having to admit being an
ass, but if that’s what it took to find his way back
into Bryson’s heart and bed, he would do it.
“I shouldn’t have kicked y’all out,” Jared
confessed.
“And?”
“Shit, man. Will you hold your damn horses?
I ain’t good at this.”
Bryson looked across Jared’s body to Walt
and nodded. “He’s right. He’s not the one to talk
things out. He hits first and then later wonders if he
should have hit harder. Me? Now I’m the talker.
But I hit too.”
“Too many more beers and you won’t know
what the hell you’re doin’. Look, I shouldn’t have
gone off half-cocked and thrown y’all out.” He
looked at Walt. “I brought you home, I brought you
into our relationship, I started this whole thing, and
I should have fought for us all.”
“Yes, you should have. Bryson is worth it.”
“You both are. No one has ever fought for
you, and it’s time someone did. Time you had a
place and a family to call your own. You have Bry
and…” Jared took a deep, shaky breath. “And you
have me too.”
Walt’s answering smile was soft, open,
welcoming. “Fight for me, huh? Never needed
anyone to fight for me.”
“What about the family part?”
“Told Bry out on the porch that you two are
my family. Never thought about it after I left the
reservation. Never looked back. But this place?
Yeah. Surrounded by mountains, the sky that goes
on forever, the land, and the horses. I love working
with the horses. Even if we all couldn’t be lovers,
I wouldn’t want to leave. I’m as in love with this
place as the two of you are. I want to stay, but I’m
not inclined to have you at odds with each other
because of me, either.”
“It can’t work if we are,” Bryson offered with
a yawn. He started to cover his mouth but ended up
smacking the back of his hand against his lips.
Walt
snickered
at
Bryson’s
lack
of
coordination but carried on with the seriousness of
the conversation. “Nope. It can’t. It’s why Jared
has to finish admitting how much he loves us both.
“I thought that’s what I was doing.”
“You’re going about it awfully slow,” Bryson
grumbled.
“Seriously? You keep interrupting me,
asshole.” There was no heat or anger behind the
words.
“He’s right, babe,” Walt chimed in. “You
do.”
“Hey now.” Bryson reached around Jared’s
back and slapped at Walt’s shoulder. “Whose side
are you on?
“I’m on all our sides. It don’t and won’t work
without the three of us. Together.”
“It won’t be easy,” Jared muttered his
uncertainty into the fray.
“I’m easy.”
Both men looked in Bryson’s direction and
laughed. Jared confirmed the statement. “You are
right now.”
Walt leaned forward and looked around Jared
toward the man on the other side. “I think you’re
drunk, Bry.”
Bryson nodded and grinned in goofiness. “I
think I am too, but I can still pay attention, so go on
with what you were sayin’.” He laid his head back
and closed his eyes.
It took Jared a few seconds to continue with
the conversation. Bryson looked so calm and
peaceful. Yeah, he’d had too much to drink, but he
was accepting of everything between them. He
wasn’t fighting it, never had, not like Jared. The
only thing Bryson fought against was losing Jared,
and when Jared stopped to think about it like that,
look at it from that perspective, it both upset him
and made him happy. Upset him to the point where
he was only mad at himself because he couldn’t
see beyond his own jealousy and the nose on his
face to what had really been happening. And happy
because Bryson had been fighting for him, for all
of them.
“We’ll probably fight a lot still,” Jared
hinted.
“But we’ll have makeup sex like the other
night. As often as necessary.”
“That was last night.”
“It was two nights ago.”
“Nope. Last night.”
Bryson lifted his hand and one by one counted
on his fingers. “Couch. Bed. Shower. Field. Porch.
Couch. Damn,” he whispered, awed surprise in his
voice. “That’s a lot o’sex. Still don’t remember
when we got here though.”
“All we needed to do was talk. To spend
some time in each other’s company. To not walk
away until we made some progress,” Walt added,
ignoring Bryson’s attempt at timelines.
Jared nodded. “You think we have?” he asked
softly.
“I would say so.” The snore that followed
Jared’s words had them both looking over at the
man on the other side of him again. Bryson’s upper
body had tilted, and his head rested on the arm of
the sofa. He was sound asleep. “Lightweight,”
Jared scoffed.
“Man can’t hold his beer.”
“Sure can’t. Usually two will do him in.”
Walt laced his hands behind his head and
leaned back, lifting his legs to set his feet on the
coffee table. “He used to drink himself into a
stupor, you know. After you threw him out. He
would empty twelve-packs after he got in from
working. Two weeks I watched him do that.”
Jared stared at his childhood friend, his best
friend, his lover. Bryson had always been
everything to him. Good situations or bad, if he
couldn’t share them or lament them with Bryson,
they weren’t worth going through. “Falling in love
with another man was never part of the plan.”
“There was a plan?”
“There’s always been a plan. Bryson and me.
Together.” He sat in silence, listening to his own
heartbeat, the quiet inhale and exhale of breath
from Walt as he waited patiently for Jared to
continue. Bryson was out cold on his other side. A
bomb could go off in the living room and Bryson
wouldn’t know it. “When we left home, Bryson’s
parents didn’t want him to go. They didn’t want
him to be gay either, but I think, given time, they’d
have come around and accepted it.”
“He chose to leave. With you?”
“Yeah. My parents, or rather my father,
couldn’t get rid of me fast enough when he learned
I preferred Steve and not Eve. I had two brothers
who did do the right thing by dating and marrying
women. My father gave the ranch to them and
basically disowned me. He didn’t say the words
when I left, but unless I changed my wicked ways,
I knew that’s what he’d do. Hell, he didn’t say
anything when I left, just looked at me with cold,
angry eyes. I haven’t been back since. My mom
stopped calling regularly after the first eight
months or so. She tried to bridge the gap and keep
me part of the family as best she could, it just
didn’t work. When she called a few months ago to
give the formal, final message to me that I’d been
disinherited and couldn’t lay claim to any part of
the ranch…” Jared shrugged. “It just confirmed to
me what I’ve known for ten years. My father hasn’t
and won’t ever change.”
“Damn. I don’t think I’ll ever understand that
kind of shit. It doesn’t change who you are, who
they loved, who they raised.”
“But to some people, it changes everything
that I’d rather live with a man than with a woman.”
“I know. I’ve been through similar stuff over
the years. Ranch hands not wanting to work with
me when they figured out I didn’t chase skirts and
didn’t look in the same direction at the bar as they
did. Does Bryson still talk to his family?”
“Yeah, every couple of months. He misses
them; I know he does. He—”
“But he chose you.”
Jared had tried never to see it that way, but
Walt was right. It really was as simple as that and
all that should matter. “Yes. Bryson chose me.
Neither of us ever took well to others.”
“Until me,” Walt offered quietly.
Jared nodded his agreement. “Until you. I
didn’t know what to do with my own feelings.
They freaked me out. Then, when Bry started
having feelings for you too… Man, that just fucked
me up. I didn’t know it meant we could have it all.
I thought it meant he and I were doomed.”
“And so you tried to get out before it could
blow up in your face?”
“Yeah. That’s exactly what I did. I wasn’t
going to give Bryson the chance to hurt me, to
leave me for someone else. That was going to be
my choice.”
“Didn’t work out so well.”
“Worked out for shit. I missed the hell out of
him.” He looked to Walt, tried to focus on the
man’s black eyes in the darkness of the room. “I
missed the hell out of you too. I haven’t known you
as long as I’ve known Bry, but when you climbed
up into the truck, everything shifted inside me.”
Walt dropped his feet back to the floor and
nudged Jared’s shoulder, lowering his hand to
trace along the muscles of Jared’s thigh. “So then,
why was it okay for everything to change for you,
but when it changed for Bryson too, it suddenly
wasn’t okay?”
Jared’s breath hitched in his throat. “I don’t
know, man. I don’t have an explanation that’s
going to satisfy any of us. I never thought I’d have
to deal with feeling like I could lose Bry. He was
the only thing I could count on, the only constant in
my life. When he fell in love with you, started
looking at you the way I’d only ever seen him look
at me, I—”
“You’re not going to run anymore, though, are
ya? Even if there are dreams again, you’re not
going to run, right?”
“Right.”
“Good.” Walt’s lips grazed Jared’s jaw as he
leaned infinitely closer.
“I…I gotta know something,” Jared started
softly, trying to keep his voice from dropping and
to keep his arousal on the fringes.
“What?”
“Walt isn’t an Indian name.”
Walt lifted his head, and Jared turned his to
meet Walt’s eyes. “You want to talk about this
now? I’m trying to get into your pants, and you
want to talk about my name?”
“I’ve missed three months with you, so yeah. I
have a lot to catch up on. I’m sure Bryson knows.”
Walt straightened and dropped his head back.
“He does. My parents gave me two names. Walter
or Walt for when I was off the reservation.
Tashunka when I wasn’t.”
“What does it mean? Tashunka?”
“It means horse.”
”Fitting, I guess, given how you are with
horses.”
“It is. When I was little, I took it to mean
that’s what I was supposed to do.” He leaned up
and nuzzled Jared’s jaw again. “Anything else
you’re dying to know right now?”
Jared laughed low. “No.”
“Good. We can get back to much more
important things.” Walt effectively cut off anything
else Jared might have been thinking about when he
picked up Jared’s hand and placed it in his lap.
Jared squeezed the hard cock against his palm, and
Walt groaned “Yeah, J. That’s what you really
want, isn’t it? Cock. Mine. And Bryson’s. You
want it buried deep inside you, riding you,
pleasuring you. You want strong arms holding you
down and holding you close. You want stubble
against your cheeks and brushing against your
mouth when you’re kissed. You want rough-and-
tumble, don’t ya?”
With each word that rushed out of Walt’s
mouth against Jared’s chin and cheek and throat,
Jared’s fingers flexed and tightened around the
shaft in his hand. He tried to form the words to
confirm what they all already knew. Yes, Jared did
want all that was offered and more. The more was
all of them, together as they’d been the last twenty-
four hours.
He stroked and manipulated Walt’s cock,
long glides up and down, and when he rubbed his
palm against the crown, Walt was the one who
caught his breath and who was near the edge.
Precum oozed, and when Jared tightened his
thumb and forefinger just under the head, more
dribbled from the slit. He watched as it slid down
the length. Before it could be lost in the midnight-
black nest of hair surrounding the base, he
massaged it into Walt’s taut cock skin, slicking his
penis.
“You’re a goddamn tease,” Walt ground out.
His voice was ragged, his pulse kicking up a few
notches, and his control holding tenuously by a
thread.
Jared leaned close and nipped at Walt’s ear.
“No I’m not.”
“You are, fuckin’ prick tease.” The words
were harsh, but he thrust his hips upward, seeking
more of the handjob Jared was only too happy to
oblige in giving. He loved the feel of the warm
cock in his hand, the searing heat from the friction
of the smooth shaft and his rough, cracked, and
calloused skin. He’d never been with a woman,
but he couldn’t imagine anything better than a
man’s touch. He craved the strength behind it, the
maleness. It drove him wild. He loved giving and
receiving, but this freedom to pleasure the two men
he loved… There wasn’t a word for what it did to
him. He only knew it was better than anything he’d
ever experienced. It was perfection, to his way of
thinking.
He pressed up on the underside and lowered
his head when another bead of clear fluid emerged.
Snaking his tongue out, he swiped at the stickiness
and all subsequent drops until Walt pushed his
head down, forcing Jared to swallow every inch of
Walt’s cock.
There was no sucking. There was no tender
loving. There was no more slow teasing. No, Walt
had a point to make this little take-charge session.
And his next words confirmed it, each one
punctuated with a thrust of his hips upward. “Take
it. Take it all. Every fuckin’ inch.”
Walt didn’t let up, and he didn’t give Jared a
chance to argue. The head of Walt’s cock touched
the back of Jared’s throat, and just when he thought
his gag reflex might kick in or that his lips would
crack from the force of the pressure at being
stretched so wide, Walt eased back. Once, twice,
three times, and Walt was coming. Jared had no
choice but to swallow.
“That’s a good boy,” Walt murmured, his
breathing heavy and slightly labored. When no
more cum flowed from him, his hold on Jared
lightened until his cock slid easily from between
Jared’s lips. “Damn. You submit so good.”
Jared chuckled. “You didn’t really give me a
choice in the matter.”
White teeth flashed in the dark Native
American face. “Did you mind?”
“Hell no.”
“Exactly.” And then the smile was gone
because Jared’s dick was being engulfed in Walt’s
heated mouth.
“Ah shit, man.”
Walt nodded, but no other gesture was made.
Only the sounds of licking, sucking, slurping up
and down the hard length of Jared’s cock could be
heard in the room. Even Bryson had stopped
snoring.
Teeth grazed his cock, and Jared forgot all
else but the man whose head was in his lap. A
blowjob from Walt was rare, but it was some
kinda treat. The man knew how to use his tongue to
tease, knew how to use his lips to pull moans from
way down deep, and definitely knew how to use
his teeth to sting, nibble, and make a grown man
beg for mercy.
And Walt employed all of them, there on the
couch. “Goddamn, let me come.” But there was no
hurrying Walt when he wasn’t in the mood. Jared
could grab the long raven hair, but his hand would
only be slapped away. He could lift his hips and
drive his cock deeper, but he’d only be held down.
Walt had called Jared a cock tease, but the truth
was, if pushed too far, Walt would bring him to the
edge, then walk away.
Jared smiled at the memory of learning that
about Walt months ago. He’d walked around with
a hard-on for two days before Walt had let Bryson
take pity on Jared. Somehow, someway the new
man had become the leader in the bedroom, the
dominant personality, the one who called most all
the shots. Jared and Bryson had fallen in line with
it without question. Truth be told, Jared had
missed it.
But maybe he wouldn’t so much if Walt
would just let him come. “Please, man.” He
moaned the words as Walt flicked his tongue into
the slit on the head of Jared’s cock. Jared would
have promised anything in the world in that
moment. He was between heaven and hell,
teetering on the edge.
Walt shook his head, his hair teasing Jared’s
thighs. He scraped his teeth up the shaft and under
the head, digging them in, and then tugged. “Holy.
Shit. Mother—”
“Will the two of you shut the hell up? I’m
tryin’ to sleep over here.”
Walt stopped tugging, and Jared stopped
groaning. He looked over at Bryson, expecting to
find the man’s eyes watching, but they were
closed, and within seconds, soft snores filled the
room again. Jared lowered his gaze to Walt to find
those eyes watching. “Please let me come,” Jared
whispered.
Walt’s eyes softened, and he dropped his
mouth down to the base of Jared’s cock. He sucked
with renewed effort, then caused Jared’s heart to
stop before speeding up as his ass was invaded by
a long finger slicked with the sweat between
Jared’s cheeks. The finger was wedged up high
and tight inside, and when it touched his gland, his
cock blew like a rocket.
He cried out and humped the mouth and finger
both, hungry to make the pleasure last. “Don’t stop
don’t stop don’t stop,” he said, over and over until
there was nothing left but the sensitive ache in his
cock and the clenching of his butt muscles in
aftershocks.
Walt sucked him dry, drained him, licked him
clean before he lifted his head and slid his tongue
into Jared’s waiting mouth. The kiss was sweet,
full of meaning and love and fierce possession.
Jared took Walt’s face between his hands and held
him there, ate at his mouth, memorized the feel of
his skin, his hair.
And still, Walt’s finger was inside Jared,
reminding him that they were connected, in body,
but in so many other ways. They were meant to be
together as much as they were meant to be with
Bryson. “We’re not leaving you again,” Walt said
when he lifted his mouth from Jared’s. “You’re not
getting rid of us, no matter what. You got me?”
Jared nodded. “Got you.” He’d have agreed
to almost anything right then. He was being ruled
by his dick, and he knew it. He was on a sexual
high that masked his vulnerability into something
he could manage. He needed things to work
between the three of them. He needed these
feelings inside him to last, to keep growing. He
needed Walt to keep touching him, to keep
showing him, to keep telling him how much he
wanted Jared. Walt eased his finger out. Instantly
Jared wanted it back, or better yet, he wanted
Walt’s cock inside him. He was kissed again, a
short peck on the lips before Walt moved off the
couch. “Now, what say we get our man here to
bed?”
* * * *
Jared stood at the stove in a pair of jeans and
a red-plaid flannel shirt. He wore thick wool
socks on his feet, and he was flipping pancakes.
Bryson couldn’t help the pang in his chest at how
much he’d missed this particular sight. Jared was
home to him, more than any house ever could be.
The way they’d taken care of one another since
leaving Texarkana and the way he’d always taken
care of Bryson, the way they’d always taken care
of each other.
“You know, I meant what I said yesterday.
There are things in this world I can live without,
but you aren’t one of them.” Jared glanced over his
shoulder and smiled. It filled Bryson’s heart to see
it that tears formed in his eyes. Crying wasn’t part
of his repertoire either, but damn, Jared got to him
on so many levels.
“You gave up a lot for me. Least I can do is
not let you go.”
Bryson hooked his thumbs in his back
pockets, trying for a casual stance. He didn’t feel
casual. He was emotional and trying to stay rooted
to the spot instead of crossing the kitchen floor to
take Jared in his arms. “I’d give my life for you, J.
You have to know that.”
“I do.” Jared nodded. “I’d be mighty pissed if
you did, ’cause then I’d have to follow.”
“Yeah?” He could see that too. Jared would
be so mad, cursin’ heaven and promisin’ hell his
soul to have Bryson back.
“I can’t live without you either, Bry. I’m
some kind of grumpy livin’ alone.”
“All you had to do is ask me back.”
“I’m askin’ now.”
“You are?”
“Come back,” Jared said softly. “You and
Walt. Come back. I need you here.”
Happiness burst in his chest at his lover’s
words. Relief quickly followed. Bryson had been
hoping for the invitation but was more than willing
to move back in without it. With it, though… It was
a conscious decision on Jared’s part, and Bryson
knew it couldn’t have been easy for him to say it.
“Good. I wasn’t plannin’ on sleepin’ away from
you again anyway.”
Jared plated the pancakes and switched off
the stove. The scent of bacon was the first thing
Bryson had smelled, followed by the cinnamon of
Jared’s pancakes. He’d rolled out of bed with a
mouthful of cotton and gotten dressed, brushed his
teeth, and made his way downstairs. Jared didn’t
usually make pancakes except on special
occasions and preferred sausage over bacon, but
knew Bryson preferred just the opposite. Both
scents would always remind him of warmth, of
their lives together, of the love they shared. “Walt
still in bed?”
“In the shower, I think.” He took the platter of
food Jared held out to him and set it on the scarred
picnic table they’d salvaged when they first moved
in. It was really too big for two men, but for three
and all the food they seemed to consume, it was
perfect. “You want—” Bryson’s words were cut
off when Jared slid his arms around him from
behind. He was clasped across the belly and chest,
and he dared not breathe. This kind of spontaneous
affection was unusual for Jared, and Bryson
intended to savor the moment. Jared was changing,
softening a little around the edges, and it did a
number on Bryson’s insides, twisting them in
knots. He could feel Jared trembling behind him,
feel the shaky exhales against his back. Vulnerable
wasn’t something Jared did often. He wasn’t very
good at it, but he was trying, and Bryson
appreciated it more than he would ever be able to
say. Jared was putting himself out there
emotionally, and Bryson could do no less than be
the steady, loving rock Jared could count on.
“You didn’t have to leave your family and
your land for me, but you did,” Jared said roughly
against Bryson’s ear. Emotion clogged his throat,
and Bryson slid a comforting hand over one of
Jared’s. “I don’t know that I ever thanked you for
choosing me when”—Jared swallowed hard
—“when my father couldn’t stand the sight of me. I
love you, Bryson. You’re everything to me.”
“I know I am.” They weren’t just empty
words or words meant to soothe Jared. Bryson
really did know what he meant to Jared, just like
deep down Jared really did know what he meant to
Bryson. The two of them had been through so much
together, from being in the same kindergarten class
to finally meeting in the middle over their need and
love for Walt who'd once been as lost as Jared had
felt all those years ago when Jared’s father turned
so cruel. Maybe that was what Jared had
recognized in Walt and maybe Bryson had too.
Maybe it was why things had turned out the way
they had. Bryson really didn’t know the answers to
any of that, but what he did know the answers to
were the questions in Jared’s eyes. “I left with you
because I knew wherever you were, that would be
where my future was too. You couldn’t wait to get
away, and I couldn’t wait to be with you. I regret
nothing, Jared.”
“But your family?”
“You are my family. You and Walt. My
parents have come to accept who I am. They may
never understand, and they may always pray for us
to find the right path, their idea of it, anyway, but
we are on the right path for us. You are mine, and I
am yours. We’ve built a home, a life. We’ve found
pleasure and love with each other and with
someone who needed us. I wouldn’t change
anything.”
“I would,” Walt interjected into the room
from the doorway. He now stood where Bryson
had been admiring Jared a few minutes earlier.
Both men looked in his direction. His raven hair
was still wet and pulled back in a ponytail. He
wore a black thermal shirt under a plaid button-
down over jeans. Unlike Jared and Bryson, Walt
never wore socks unless he was wearing shoes
too.
He nearly overpowered the room, and he
wasn’t even fully standing in it yet. He would
always take Bryson’s breath away with his stark
good looks and his dark, deep need for Jared and
Bryson alike. “What would you change?” Bryson
asked, his throat suddenly parched, thirsty for a
taste of the big Indian.
Walt rubbed his belly. “I’d fill my empty
stomach with some of that food and warm myself
with some coffee.”
Jared chuckled and kissed the side of
Bryson’s neck before unwrapping himself from
behind him. Bryson took a seat at the table, and
Walt took a seat on the other side. Jared grabbed
the bottle of syrup and the coffee pot before he sat
as well. Next to Bryson. Where he would always
belong.
“So, what’s on the agenda today?” Walt
asked, his eyes roaming back and forth between the
other men. He stabbed three pancakes with his fork
and put them on his plate. His fingers snagged
several slices of bacon as well. Bryson and Jared
simply watched. “What?”
Jared laughed. “Nothing, man. You hungry?”
“Last night wore me out.”
“I don’t remember anything about last night.”
“Probably a good thing.” Jared stabbed three
pancakes of his own. When Walt finished with the
butter, Jared took it, followed by the syrup.
“Why would it be a good thing?”
“No reason,” Walt said, moments before he
stuffed his mouth. “Damn, I’ve missed these.”
“Slow down.” Jared chuckled. “There are
plenty.”
“I was drunk, wasn’t I?” Bryson made the
inquiry, unsure he wanted the answer but trying to
piece together the things he didn’t know.
“You were.” Jared handed off the butter and
syrup to Bryson, who had finally filled his own
plate.
“All we did was talk.”
“Don’t forget the handjobs.”
“Could never forget those.”
“Wait? There were handjobs? Did I get one?”
“You were three sheets, buddy, so no.”
“Fuck. Well, don’t let me drink that much
anymore. What did y’all talk about? Are you
okay?” Bryson watched as a look passed between
Jared and Walt. What he saw made him smile, and
his heart fill even more. There was calm, desire,
care. There was a renewed love, a starting point.
“Yeah. We’re good,” Jared answered softly,
his gaze touching Bryson’s briefly before returning
to Walt’s.
“Good, ’cause the agenda today is moving our
stuff into the house and out of the cabin.”
Walt smiled, slow and sure. “Well. All right,
then. Sounds like a plan.” He kept his smile in
place and turned his attention back to eating.
Bryson dug into his plate but nudged Jared
under the table. Jared nudged him back. It would
work this time around. He felt it deep down inside.
Confidence filled him with the possibilities the
future held for the three of them together.
Happiness too. The road traveled to get to this
place of contentment, this place of trust that would
be an ongoing journey, had been a long one. It
started the moment his and Jared’s hands touched
that long-ago night, walking home from the football
game. It reached new heights when they settled
down together, and climbed even higher when
Walt joined them.
“Yeah, sounds like a real good plan,” Bryson
agreed, starting to eat, eager to get started on the
day, eager to get started on living their lives again.
Together.
Loose Id Titles by Lissa Matthews
Arrested Holiday
Double Up
Stick Shift
Lissa Matthews
Living in North Carolina, talented, multi-
published author, Lissa Matthews, has many loves
in her life: Family, friends, NASCAR, football,
music of all kinds, cooking, BDSM, and last, but
not least, coffee. She loves it so much she and
those who know her are surprised she hasn’t
floated away on a caffeine-induced cloud while
giving life to feisty heroines and hunky heroes.
Lissa’s love of romance came from every
book she has ever picked up. No matter what she
read, she fell in love with the written word. The
promise of escape, the deep, intriguing characters,
and the winding journey from beginning to end,
constantly drew her into bookstores and libraries
as she was growing up.
Her first stories were written in junior high
and she kept it up through college. She would stay
up late at night when her kids were little, reading
romance and still penning her own stories. In
2007, when she and her family moved to North
Carolina from Florida, she began pursuing writing
as a profession and she couldn’t imagine doing
anything else… Well, except maybe writing in her
own cupcake bakery/coffee shop. But that dream is
a ways down the road… Lucky for Lissa, she
believes in dreams coming true.
Lissa is married with two children and seven,
yes, seven cats. She blames her oldest child for the
cats.
Find
out
more
about
Lissa
at
http://lissamatthews.com
.
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Loose Id Titles by Lissa Matthews
Lissa Matthews
Document Outline
- Chapter One
- Chapter Two
- Chapter Three
- Chapter Four
- Chapter Five
- Chapter Six
- Loose Id Titles by Lissa Matthews
- Lissa Matthews
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