TableofContents
PARTONE
CHAPTERONE
CHAPTERTWO
CHAPTERTHREE
PARTTWO
CHAPTERFOUR
CHAPTERFIVE
CHAPTERSIX
CHAPTERSEVEN
CHAPTEREIGHT
CHAPTERNINE
CHAPTERTEN
CHAPTERELEVEN
CHAPTERTWELVE
EPILOGUE
TheSEALsSecretBaby
MailingList
AboutLillyHolden
TableofContents
PARTONE
CHAPTERONE
CHAPTERTWO
CHAPTERTHREE
PARTTWO
CHAPTERFOUR
CHAPTERFIVE
CHAPTERSIX
CHAPTERSEVEN
CHAPTEREIGHT
CHAPTERNINE
CHAPTERTEN
CHAPTERELEVEN
CHAPTERTWELVE
EPILOGUE
TheSEAL’sSecretBaby:
ASecondChanceBadBoyMilitaryRomance
SEALMercenaries2
By
LillyHolden
TheSEAL’sSecretBaby:ASecondChanceBadBoyMilitaryRomance
PublishedbyLillyHolden
Copyright2017LillyHolden
EditedbyRedQuillEditingLLC
eBookISBN:978-0-9945764-6-0
Allrightsreserved.Nopartofthisbookmaybereproduced,scanned,ordistributed
in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or
encouragepiracyofcopyrightedmaterialsinviolationoftheauthor’srights.
Thisisaworkoffiction.Names,places,charactersandincidentsaretheproductof
the author’s imagination and are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or
dead,eventsorestablishmentsissolelycoincidental.
whereIshareexclusivegiveaways,newreleasealerts,andfreereads.
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Comejoininthefunofallthingsalphabadboy!
THESEALSSECRETBABY
Somesecretsensureaperson’sfreedom.
Sophie’ssecrettieshertomeforever.
One day two and a half years ago, I buried a ghost, a man who had haunted me
throughoutmylife.
That night, I seized my one chance and shared my bed with the girl I’d secretly
adoredfromthetimewewerekids.ThewomanI’dneverdaredhopewouldbemine.
Shewastoogood,toopure.
Iwashard,rough.ANavySEAL.Akiller.
Allwehadwasafewstolenhoursbeforelifeandfamilydestroyedthefantasy.
NowI’vereturnedtoRushvilletosellmyfamilyhome,thelaststepinbreakingfree
ofmypast…untilIfindI’mnowhereneardone.
NotwithSophie.Notwithmypast.Andnotwiththesecretshewasdesperatetohide
fromme.
ButI’mnottheonlyonewhohasunfinishedbusinesswithSophie.
I’llneedeveryoneofmykillerinstinctstoprotectwhatismine.
**TheSEAL’sSecretBabyisaquickandnaughtypageturnerinvolvinganobsessed
alpha hero, a sassy heroine, and enough second-chance love and sizzling romantic
suspensetomeltyourkindle.HEAandnocheatinginthisemotionaltale.
TABLEOFCONTENTS
Deke
I stood beside the graveside and gazed at the coffin that held my father. Stained
mahogany with brass fittings. The closest Boyd Williams had ever come to anything
classyinhislife.
Deadatfifty-sevenfromananeurysm.
Thebitter-coldbreeze,synonymouswithRushville,Ohio,inlatewinter,slappedmy
face and shoulders like an angry lost love. The dark winter coat and gray suit I’d
purchasedthismorningdoinglittletokeepmewarm.Nomatter.Thebitingchillservedas
areminderofwhyI’dleftallthoseyearsago.
I ignored the Pastor’s voice as he attempted to flesh out the meager biography of a
bitterandtwistedman,whowasneverhappyandalwaysresentedwhatothershadafter
hiswifehadrunoffandlefthimwithafouryear-oldsonandlotsofregrets.
Over the years, the old man had shared those regrets with me, loudly, sometimes
accentuatedwiththeuseofhisfists,wheneverlifedealthimalosinghand.
Lostpromotions.“I’dhavegotthatjobifIhadn’thadtotakethattimeoffwhenyou
weresick.Pneumonia?Nothingbutabadcold.”Lostgirlfriends.“Marcy’sgone.Doesn’t
want some whelp that isn’t her own.” A lost future. “I was gonna be a baseball player.
Hadscoutscometomyschool.Butyourmagotherselfpregnant.Nomorebaseball.And
thensheleaves.Sheleavesme!Where’sthejusticeinthat?”
Of course there was no justice for Boyd Williams. Life didn’t come with apologies
forhavingtodealwiththechoiceshemade.
Norforthosewhosufferedbecauseofthosechoices.
Iranmythumbalongmyindexfinger,feelingthethinlineofscartissuewherethe
skinhadbrokenwhenhepoundedmyhandwithafryingpanfordaringtoquestionhim
onsomethinginnocent.Twelve-year-oldboysshouldmindtheirmannersinBoyd’sbook
ofparenting.
Goodtimes,Dad.
I could feel the stares of the mourners around me. Some filled with pity, others
outright curiosity of what I was, the twenty-nine year old long-lost son, returning home
afterelevenyearsawayasaNavySEAL.
Ignoringallthosestareswaseasy.
Allbutone.
Isweptmygazeoverthesmallcrowdgatheredontheothersideofthecoffin,past
my childhood friends and neighbors Andy Neilson and Rob Hawkins, both men looking
older,theirexpressionsuncertain,asifnotsureofwhoIwasaftersomanyyearsaway.
Thenfurtheralong,pastRob’sparentsandthewomanstandingbesidethem.
Sophie Hawkins, her small frame hidden under a tan-colored winter coat and dark
pants, studied me with those soulful brown eyes of hers. Good manners would have
dictatedafterafewsecondsIlookaway.ButIwasn’tamanwhobowedtoconvention.
Gone was the flyaway hairstyle of her teenage years, her long brown waves now
caughtupinoneofthosetwistybuns,allowingaglimpseoftheskinbelowherearsnot
hiddenbytheblackscarfwrappedaroundherneck.
HowmanytimesaskidshadIteasedmyfriend’slittlesisterthatthecuriosityalways
shining in her gaze would get her into trouble? But there was no trace of curiosity now.
Wasitpity?No.She’dneverburdenedmewiththatwhenmydadwasalive.Sophiehad
alwaysbeenaquietbelieverinme,alwayswantingtobeonmyteamwhenIplayedball
withRobandAndy,cheeringmeonwhenIgotintoscrapeswiththeschoolbully.
No,pitywasn’tSophie’sfallbackwhenitcametome.ButIwasn’tgoingtoquestion
deeperwhateverwasbehindthatunfamiliarlookinhergaze.
NotjustbecauseIwasstandingbesidemyoldmaninhiscoffin.
Sophierepresentedabiggerthreatthananyinsurgentinafaroffconflictzone.
Fromthetimeasyoungkidswhen,atageeighttomytenyears,she’dsotrustingly
slippedherhandinmineandchattedtomeaswewalkedtoschool,Sophiehadbecome
everything that was good, pure. The girl I’d secretly adored for more years than I could
count.ThegirlIvowedwastoospecialforme,aroughkidwho’dlearnedtooyounghow
to use his fists to stand his ground against a man decades older. A kid who’d left at
eighteentoapplyfortheNavySEALsandbecamethemanIwasnow.
Abattle-hardenedkiller.
“Mycondolences,Deke.”
IturnedmygazefromSophietostareatthepastorasthemanclosedhisBibleand
movedclose.Astrangertome,hisserviceshadbeenorganizedbythefuneralhome.
“Thanks.Iappreciateyourtimetoday.”Ishooktheman’shand.Whatmorewasthere
to be said? I wasn’t a guy for empty platitudes and the pastor read that loud and clear,
steppingawaytomakeroomforothers.
Mr.andMrs.Hawkins,adustingofgraynowstreakedthroughtheirhair,werefirst
up. Emily Hawkins pulled my head down to kiss my cheek before wrapping her arms
aroundmeforahug.Iallowedherthismoment.Manyyearsago,sheandherhusbandhad
openedtheirhousetome,invitingmetobelikeanextendedmemberoftheirfamily.I’d
notbeenshyintakingthemupontheirofferandhaveneverforgottentheirgenerosity.
DougHawkinsgrippedmyarmwithonehandandsqueezedmyhandwiththeother.
“Comeoverandseeuswhenyou’reready,son.”Withanod,hesteppedaside,allowing
theonslaughttobegin.
TenminutesofshakinghandsanddeflectingquestionsaboutmylifeandIwasdone.
TheonepersonIwantedtospeaktohadn’tcomenearme.Iglancedovertomyleftand
caught sight of Sophie slipping into the backseat of a sedan, her parents getting into the
front.
Nowordsatall?Asenseoflossfilledme,lodgingheavyinmygut.
I cursed to myself. What good would it do, having Sophie, the unattainable prize,
standinginfrontofme?
Countyourblessings,dumbass.
Frombehindme,ahandclappedmyshoulder.
InlessthanasplitsecondI’dturnedandhadaman’sarminapunishinggrip,ready
tobreakbonesandrendermyassailantpowerless.
“Shit,Deke.”Robgrimaced,hisfacecontortedinpainashebentoveratthewaist.
Hisdarkbrownhair,thesamecolorashissister’s,felloverhisforehead.
Fuck.
“Man,I’msorry.”ReleasingmyholdonRob’sarm,Iputmyhandsonhisshoulders,
tighteningmygripthroughhisthickblackcoat,andsteadiedhim.Andy,dressedlikeRob
inadarkcoatoverasuitandtiecombo,stoodnexttoRob,hisexpressionwary.Seeing
Rob now had his bearings, I held out my hand. “Not always good to approach a SEAL
frombehind.”
Rob’s semi-glare held a grudging amount of respect and not a small amount of
caution.“Nexttime,I’llblowanairhornbeforeIstepwithintenfeet.”Butheshookmy
handallthesame.
Andy followed suit, his grip firm. “We should have given you more warning.”
Around six feet like Rob, but with short blond hair, he ran his blue-eyed gaze over me.
“You’reevenbiggerthanIremember.What,six-fournow?”Alinecreasedhisforehead.
“Whyaren’tyouinuniform?”
“I’mout.”Threedaysagotobeprecise.“Abouttostartworkingforaprivatesecurity
firm.”OneownedbyhisformerSEALteamleader.
Rob’sgazeremainedsteady.“I’mguessingthatfirmisn’tbasednearRushville.”
“Nope.”Yearsofkeepingmissiondetailssecretdidn’twearoffovernight,butIcould
shareafewbasicpointswithguyswhohadbeenmyfriendssincechildhood.“Basedin
Denver.” I glanced around the gravesite. Only the three of us remained. I checked my
watch. 2 pm. Still early. But it was a Friday, and for some reason beyond my
comprehension,Iwasfeelingasuddenonsetofnostalgia.OrmaybeIdidn’twanttogo
hometothathousejustyet.“Eitherofyouguysneededbackatworkthisafternoon?”
Andyshookhishead.“I’mworkingweekendshiftatthestation.”
I’dheardthroughanemailfromRobyearsagothatAndyhadachievedhisdreamof
becomingacop.
“I’m good,” Rob confirmed. “That’s the beauty of owning your own carpentry
business.”
“Let’sgrabacoupleofbeersandcatchupforanhourorso.”
“Soundslikeaplan.”AndygavethatsameeasysmileIrememberedfromouryouth.
Robpulledouthisphone.“I’llcallmywifeandletherknow.”
“You’remarried?”Christ,howmuchhadImissedtheselastyears?
Rob,hisphoneathisear,chuckled.“Ithinkthiscatch-upisgonnatakelongerthana
coupleofhours.”
A few beers and easy conversation with a couple of buddies might dull the insane
urgetotrackdownSophieand…what?Chatoveroldtimes?
Jesus.Bringonthedistraction.
Thatsuitedmefine.
Sophie
Imusthavebeencrazy.TherewasnootherwaytoexplainwhyIwasstandingonthe
front porch of Deke William’s family home at seven o’clock at night with my hands
encasedinkitty-patternedovenmittswhileholdingadishoflasagna.
MaybeifIjustleftthedishonthe—
Aflashofavehicle’sheadlightsshinedontheporch—andonmeasanSUVpulled
intothedriveway.
Secondslaterthelightsturnedoffandatallfigureclimbedoutofthevehicle.
“Sophie?”
Thenervesinmybellyquivered.
Thatvoice.
Deep.Gravelrough.
Andamajorelementofmyfantasiesoverthelasttenorsoyears.
“Hi.” I swallowed against the thickness in my voice and tried again. “Hi, Deke.”
Smilingbrightly,Iliftedthepanoflasagna.“Momthoughtyoumightlikesomethingfor
dinner.”IkeptmygazeonDekeashewalkeduptheporchstepsandstoppedafewfeetin
frontofme.
With no porch light on, the early winter evening left us both shrouded in shadows.
Andhewasonefreakingbigshadow.NotthatIwasfrightenedofDeke.NottheboyI’d
fallen for when I was eight years old. He’d never hurt me. More that his size and that
steely manner with which he held himself earlier today reminded me he was all man, a
SEAL,notthelostteenagerwho’dleftussolongago.
Tall.Masculine.Dangerous.
Andstandingrightinfrontofme.
Aheadycombinationforanygirl.
ThosenervesinmybellydidaflipflopasDekemovedbesideme,unlockedhisfront
doorandturnedonthefoyerlight.
TheideaofstandinginshadowsoclosetoDekewasenticing.Therealityofhaving
himtoweringovermeinclearsightstolemybreath.
Hisbrownhairwascutmilitaryshort,andthefeaturesofhisface—highcheekbones
andastrong,squarejaw—lookedharderthanIrememberedbutruggedlyhandsome.His
sharp,graygazestudiedmewithaquietintensitythatwasboththrillingandunnerving,
sendingasuddenrushofexcitementthroughme.
Dressedinadarkwintercoatthatonlyemphasizedthebulkofhisbuild,hedropped
hisgazetothedishIwasholding.“Cuteovenmitts.”
Wasitmyimagination,ordidIseehislipstwitch?
“AgiftIgotforMomyearsago,”Isharedagainstarushofinanenervousnessnow
that I was standing in front of the man I’d missed terribly for the last eleven years. “I
thoughttheywerecuteatthetime.Youknow,kittiesand,um,soforth,”Ifurthershared.
Lord,someonebeammeupandsavemefrommyself.
Deke refrained from further comments on said kitties, instead, nodding at the dish.
“Yourmommadethis?”
“Idid.”ThewordstumbledoutbeforeIcouldcallthemback.
“Butitwasyourmom’sideaforyoutobringitover?”
“Yes,” I began, except… “I mean, no. That was me, too.” As he lifted a brow, I
trippedovermywords.“Ithoughtitwouldbeniceforyoutohaveahomecookedmeal,
andsheagreed.”Igroanedinwardly.HadthatsoundedtoocaringonmypartforaguyI
hadn’t seen in years? “Hey, who doesn’t like lasagna? And this way you don’t have to
make dinner.” Good point. Okay, I was on track now. As long as I didn’t think of him
staringdownatmelikehecouldreadmyeverysecret.“Notthatyouhavetolimiteating
lasagnatodinner.Breakfastandlunchareoptions,too.”
Oh my god, did I just say that? Closing my eyes for a second, I aimed to regroup.
“That’stosay,it’samealforalloccasions,”IprattledonasDekeleanedbackagainstthe
door frame and crossed his arms over his chest as if settling in for the full show. “And,
um,timesofeating.”
Deke lifted his gaze to over my head and stared into the distance, as if deciding
something. Likely on how to nicely suggest I seek some kind of therapy. Then he
straightenedfromthedoorandgentlytookholdofmyarm.“Sweetofyoutothinkofme.
Let’sgetyouandthatlasagnainsidebeforeyoubothgetcold.”
Too late I noted I should have just handed him the dish, kitty-patterned oven mitts
andallandmadeadignifiedexit.ButthetruthwasIdidn’twanttogo.EverystepItook
downthehallwaytowardthekitchenremindedmethismanhadjustburiedhisdad.Boyd
Williams may have been a bastard of the highest order, but he was still Deke’s father.
Cominghometoanemptyhouseaftersuchadayseemedtooharsharealityinmymind.
But…DekehadbeenawayforyearsnowfromeverythingIstillconsideredfamiliar.
Maybehewantedtobealone?
“Icanjustleavethelasagnaandgiveyousomeprivacyifyouwish.”
“No.”Deke’stonemadehisanswerseemmorelikeadeclaration.“I’dappreciatethe
companyifyou’dliketostayandshareamealwithme.”
Happinesswelledupinsidemelikeabubblingbrookinthespring.MaybeIhadn’t
been wrong in thinking he could use a friend. I smiled as I walked through the kitchen
doorway.“Okaythen.”
He flicked a switch on the wall and the fluorescent light strip in the center of the
ceilingblinkedtolife,bathingtheroominitsharshglare.Ihadn’tbeeninthehousesince
Deke left home all those years ago. Nothing had changed in the kitchen with its pine
cupboardsandatiledbluecounterdatingfromthe’80s.
Dekelaidawoodenchoppingboardonthecounter,andIsetthedishinplace.
Removingtheovenmitts,Ishruggedoutofmycoat,revealingtheburgundyknittop
I’d paired with my jeans. Deke took my coat from me and headed down the hallway,
returning minus his own coat and suit jacket. He was pulling off a dark gray tie, then
rolleditupinhishandsbeforeplacingitonthecounter.
Thewhitenessofhisopenneckedshirtemphasizedthetannedskinofhisthroatand
upperchestandthebroadspanofhisshouldersandchest.
Asateenager,Dekehadalwaysbeenbigandstrongforhisage.Butasaman,hewas
thoroughlyintimidating.
Would it feel thrilling to be held in his arms, against his hard body? Would I feel
protectedorvulnerableinthesexiestofways?
Mypulseracedattheidea.
Maybeabitofboth?
“Sophie?”
Istarted,catchingDeke’squizzicallook.God,howlonghadIstoodtherestaringat
him?
Needingtofocusonsomethingotherthanthehunkofmasculinitystandingsoclose
tome,Iglancedaroundatthecupboards.“Glassesandplatesstillinthesameplaces?”
Deke’s expression softened for a moment, as if taking comfort in that shared
connection from years ago. “Yeah. You serve up the lasagna. I’ll get the cutlery and
drinks.There’sbottledwaterorbeerinthefridge.What’syourpoison?”
“Water,thanks.”Igrabbedaservingspoonandtwoplates,heapedalargeservingon
Deke’splateandasmalleroneforme.Pastaalwaysfilledmeupsoquickly,I’dlearnedto
eatmycarbsslowlyandavoidabellyache.
Settingtheplatesonthepinekitchentable,InotedDekehadtwobottlesofwater.“I
guessedyou’dwantabeeraftertoday.”
“Already indulged after the funeral with your brother and Andy. Two was my limit
sinceIwasdriving.”Deketwistedthetopoffhisbottleandtookahealthyswig.
Hespentsometimewithhisfriends?Gladnessfilledmewithwarmthatthesignhe’d
managedtoreconnect,atleastonsomelevel,withhischildhoodbuddies.“Butnowthat
you’rehome?”
“I like to stay sharp.” He lifted his fork and paused, staring at me from across the
table.“Goodhabitskeepyoualiveinmylineofwork.”
Noddingatthatsoberingcomment,Iwatchedhimdigintothesteamypasta.“How’s
militarylife?”
Dekefinishedhismouthful.“Igotoutafewdaysago.Wasonmywaytomeetup
withsomebuddiesandstartanewjobwhenthenewscameinonBoyd.”
Boyd. Not Dad. His distancing from his father sounded cold. But his stance was
honest.ThatwasDeketoaT.
“Iwasgoingtocomeuptoyouatthefuneral,butIsawRobandAndyheadedyour
way,andIdidn’twanttointrudeontheirmoment.”
Helookedupfromhisplateandheldmygaze.“Ilookedforyou.”
Mybreathstayedlockedinmychestforseverallongmoments.“Youdid?”
“Yeah,Soph,Idid.”
Thereitwas.Hiswayofshorteningmyname.I’dmissedhearingthenicknamesaid
inhisvoice.
I remained still, my hand holding my fork poised over my lasagna. My need to
explain became greater than my desire to protect myself. “I felt it wasn’t the right time.
Youwereclosedoffatthegravesite,andIdidn’twanttohaveourfirstwordstobewhen
youwereinthatmood.”Loweringmyforktomyplate,Iletoutabreath.“Ididn’twantto
berebuffed.”
Dekewassilentforwhatseemedlikeages.“I’dneverrebuffyou,Soph,”hestatedin
avoicesolowandpowerfulIfeltthepromisedeepinmybones.Droppinghisgazetohis
plate,heforkedmorepasta.“Thecardinyourmom’slastChristmaspackagesaidyou’d
startedteachingatthelocalhighschool.”
It may have been my mom who wrote the letter, but I knitted the scarf and helped
shopforthegiftsincludedinthepackage.Everyyearwasthesame.Somehow,addinga
letterfrommewasjust…toointimatewithDeke.Hehadn’tcontactedmepersonallysince
he left town. Staying one step removed protected my feelings. Even Rob only received
sporadic emails. Mom seemed his major point of contact over the years with the
occasionalletter.
“Yep,teachingAPEnglish.”Reachingformybottleofwater,Icontinued.“Iloveit.”
Deke’smouthtippedupinagrin,andImarveledatthedifferenceitmade,relaxing
what now seemed to be his normally serious expression. Deke had never been what I’d
considercarefreeinhisnature,buthewasclosedoffevenmorenowasamanwho’dspent
yearsinthemilitary.
“Makessense.Youalwayshadyourheadinabookwhenyouweren’ttaggingalong
behindRob,Andy,andme.”
“Youmeanwhenyouguyswouldletmehangoutwithyou.”IgrinnedasIforked
some lasagna. “I look back now and marvel at how patient you were with me. Rob and
Andymusthavepaidyoutoputupwithmeonyourteamforbasketballandhelpingme
learntoridemybike.”
Dekeleanedbackinhischair.“Don’tsellyourselfshort.Youwereascrappyplayer
atbasketball.BeingsmallerwasanadvantageoverAndywhowasallganglylimbs.You
weremysecretweapon.”
“Oh,myGod,IrememberwhenAndyhadthatgrowthspurtatfourteen.”Mygiggle
hadDeke’sgrinwidening.“Henearlytrippedoverhimselfhewassouncoordinated.”
“Musthavedevelopedsomecoordinationnowthathe’sacop.”
Inoddedasaswalloweddownmypasta.“Seemsso.FromwhatRobsays,heloves
being on the force.” Studying Deke, I ventured a more personal question. “What about
you?HowdidyoufindtheSEALs?”
“Tough. Challenging. But I felt at home there. Made some good friends.” Deke
finishedoffhislastmouthfulofpasta.
Ipressedahead,wantingtoknowmore.“Andthisnewjob,what’sthatabout?”
“PrivatesecuritycompanyrunbymyformerSEALteamleader.”
“Notanine-to-fivejobthen.”Andprobablynotlocal.
Itriedtoignoretheheavyfeelinggrowinginmystomach.
“That’snotmystyle,Soph.”Deke’stonewasalmostapologetic,asifhewasletting
meknowthebarrierhe’dplacedbetweenhimselfandeveryonethisafternoonwasstillin
place.“Job’sbasedinDenver.”
Not exactly a short drive from Rushville, Ohio. “So you don’t plan on hanging
aroundhere.”
“Thishousehasneverbeenahappyplaceforme,Soph,”hesaidinaquietwaythat
spokevolumes.
Iswallowedagainstthatawfultruth.Iknewasmuch.Dammit,ofcourseIknewthat.
Buthomewasmorethanahouse.“Therearepeopleherewhocareaboutyou.Myfamily
included.”Ineededhimtoknowthat.Neededhimtoknowhemattered.Allthoseyearsas
akidofbeingtoldbyhisfatherhewasworthlessmusthaveleftascar.Theclosed-offway
heheldhimselfthisafternoonledmetobelievethatscarrandeep.
Deke went still in a way I’d never seen anyone do before. Not just his body
unmoving, but as if every bit of his concentration was now focused on me as he stared
back.
Ishiftedinmychair,aflutterofnervesskatingovermyskinunderhisunrelenting
scrutiny.Atthesametime,Icouldn’tlookawayfromhim.NotfromthemanIsharedso
many memories with and, unknown to him, so many hopes and dreams I knew would
neverbefulfilled.
“Whyareyouhere,Soph?”
Mypulseraced.“Whatdoyoumean?”
“You bring me lasagna. We catch up over food in a way that you don’t feel so
vulnerable to my giving you a cold shoulder. I get that. But the end is going to be the
same.I’mleavinginadayortwo,andnothingwillchangethatfact.”Hetiltedhisheadto
theside.“Whatisityouwant?”
“Iwantyoutounderstandyou’rebetterthanyourfather.”
Thelineofhisshoulderstensed.“Knowthatalready,Soph.”
“Doyou?Knowingandbelievingaretwodifferentthings,Deke.”
He rose from his seat in one fluid movement, his expression blank. “Time to go
home,Sophie.”
Sophie.NotSoph.
Yeah,Iwasn’ttakingthatbullshit.
Istood,thetopofmyheadonlylevelwiththethirdbuttonofhisshirt,butIdidn’t
back down. “Eleven years ago, you left without a goodbye. I get you needed to make
somethingofyourself,Deke.Butthatdidn’tmeaneveryoneyouleftbehinddidn’tgivea
damnaboutyou.”
Years of feeling anger toward the father and frustration toward the son boiled over,
firing up my temper. Stepping forward, I jabbed a finger into, it had to be said, an
extremely hard male chest. “But you didn’t write or call. Hell, you didn’t even send me
onefreakingemail.”Iblinkedagainstthesuddenburninginmyeyes.“Notone.”
Christ,Ihatedthewaymyvoicebrokeonthoselastwords.
Foraninstant,somethingakintoregretflashedinhiseyes.“Sophie,Ididn’tthink
—”
“No, you didn’t.” I slapped my hand on his chest and pushed. Deke didn’t move,
even a tiny amount. I may as well have hit a stone wall, which only added fuel to my
frustration.“Youlefthere,letgoofeveryoneandeverythingexcepttheoccasionalletter
to my mom.” I rolled my eyes at that point. “Did you know I snooped on my brother’s
emailaccountonedaywhenhe’dleftitopenonhiscomputersoIcouldgetyouremail
address?” At his raised brows, I nodded. “Yeah, a high point in my development as an
adult.Ofcourse,whenI’dfinallycomposedmycheeryemailtoyouIhadtothrowitin
mytrashfolder.You’dneveremailedme,andIdidn’twanttolookpathetic,reachingout
toyouwhenitwasclearyouhadnointerestinhavingcontactwithme.”
Dekesighed,hisexpressionresigned.“Iowedyouanemailsayinggoodbye.”
Jesus,hestilldidn’tgetit.
“Listen,youidiot!”Ishovedathischestwithbothhands,thistimemanagingtoforce
himbackastep.“Ididn’twantyoutoowemeanemail,Deke.Iwantedyoutoknowyou
neverneededtoshutyourselfofffromallofusinthefirstplace.”Iwenttoshovehischest
again.
ButDekewasready,wrappinghisarmsaroundmeandholdingmeprisoneragainst
him.“Settledown,Soph.”
“Don’tyoudaretellmetosettledown,youjerk!”Istruggledagainsthishold,butall
it had succeeded in doing was making me breathe more loudly. Awesome. “For a smart
guyyou’rereallyobtuseattimes.”
“Leavingherewasmychancetomakesomethingofmyself.Lettinggoofyouwasn’t
easy.”AsIlookedaway,hegrippedthehairatthebackofmyheadandforcedmetomeet
his gaze, those gray eyes of his now bright with anger. “But I considered it my only
option,andI’ddothesameifIhadtorepeatthepast.”
Whatthehell?
“Why?Whatisityou’resoafraidof,Deke?”Isearchedhisfaceforsomeclue.“Was
Ithatmuchofadetrimenttoyousucceedinginlife?”
Amuscletickedinhisjaw.“No,butIwastoyou.”
I froze. Seconds passed as all that had happened years ago fell into place. “You
abandoned our friendship—not because you didn’t care, but because you thought I was
betteroffwithoutyou.”Mywordswerespokeninasoftvoice,butIfelttheirimpactlikea
blowtomybody.
“Still do, Soph.” The anger went out of his gaze, replaced by a dark tenderness. “I
knowyouhero-worshippedme.”Ifeltheatstainmycheeks,butIdidn’tlookaway.The
momentwastooimportant,yearsoverdue.“Youhavenoideahowmuchthatmeanttome.
EverydayasakidI’dbeentoldIwasunwanted.Butyourfamilywelcomedmeasoneof
theirown.Andyou…”Hereleasedmyhairtorunthebackofhisfingerovermycheek.
“Every time I was with you, I felt ten feet tall.” His arm around me tightened, nearly
crushingmeagainsthim,butIstayedsilent,notwantingtoendthismoment.“Youhada
faithinmeI’dneverexperiencedwithanyoneuntilIbecameaSEAL.Robwasyourbig
brotherandIneverintrudedonhisturf.Butwhatwehadwasdifferent.”
Iheldmybreathashisfingermovedfrommycheektotraceovermylipsandthen
downtothelengthofmyneck.
“We were friends, but there was something extra. A bond. I wanted to be the very
bestIcouldaroundyou,Soph.Tobeworthyofthefaithyouhadinme.Itwasallpretty
simplewhenwewereyounger,butthenweturnedintoteenagersandmyhormoneskicked
in. I wanted you in ways that were anything but purely friendship. By the time I left at
eighteenyouwerefeaturinginmynighttimedreams.”
ThankGodIwasn’ttheonlyonewhohadbeenthinkingalongthoselines.
“There’snoshameinhavingthosekindofdreams.”
“TherewaswhenIwasn’ttheguyforyou.Sureasfucknotwhenyouweresixteen.”
Irelaxedinhisarms,andhisholdlessened,allowingmetoliftmyhandtohisneck.
“I’mnotsixteenanymore,Deke.I’mtwenty-seven.”
Hisgazenarrowed.“Don’tplaygames,Soph.”
“I’mnot.”Firmingmygriponhisneck,Itriedtopullhisheadclosertomine,buthe
resisted.“I’mallgrownup.Youdon’thavetofeelguilty.”
Hemovedhishandtothebackofmyneckandgrippedmefirmly,asifinwarning.
“Ifyoupushwhatyou’reoffering,Iwon’tstopatonekiss.”
“Jesus,Ihopenot.”Iallowedmyselfasmileathiswickedpromise.
Hehadanunreadableexpressioninhiseyesashestudiedme.“Andinthemorning,
whenI’mstillmakingplanstoleaveinadayortwo?”
Isteadiedmybreathingevenasthemusclesinmybellyknotted.TomorrowI’ddeal
with my grief at the loss of him leaving. “We have this one night, Deke. And you more
thananyoneunderstandsthatlifeisshortandweshouldseizethemoment.”
“Then tonight you’re mine.” Deke lowered his head and I prepared for a hard,
demandingkiss,butinstead,hislipsweresoft,temptingme,drawingmecloseruntilmy
headwasbentbackandbothmyarmswerearoundhisneck.Heraisedhisheadandread
myconfusionwithaslightsmile.“I’vewantedthisforsolong,Soph.I’mgoingtotake
mytimewithyou.”Liftingmeupinhisarms,heheadeddownthehallwaytowardhisold
bedroom.
Athrillofarousalsweptthroughme,heatingmyblood.“NeverletitbesaidItolda
SEALhowtogoabouthismission.”
Deke’sgrinlituphisface,andIsmiledbackasheenteredhisbedroomandflicked
onthelightswitch.Istaredatthesurroundings.GonewasanytraceofDeke’schildhood.
The room had been made into what looked like a permanent spare room with a queen
sizedbedandonenightstandandawardrobe.“Foundtheroomthiswaylastnight.It’sa
goodthing,Soph.ThiswayIdon’thaveanyghostsfromthepast.”
I nodded, but in the back of my head I cursed the father who would go to such
lengthstoeradicatealltracesofhisson’sexistence.
“Sophie.”Deke’scommandingvoicebrokethroughmythoughts.“Eyesonme.”
I’dneverbeenhappiertofollowaninstructioninmylife.
Heloweredmetomyfeetbesidethebedandmadeshortworkofgettingmenaked.
Only then did he pause to study me in a way that had my face heating as well as other
partsofmybody.
“You’remoregorgeousthanIcouldhaveimagined,baby.”Heranhishandsfrommy
shouldersdownmyarmsandthenoneonmyhip,anchoringmeinplacewhilehisother
handcuppedmybreast.Gently,hesqueezed,plumpingthemounduntilIfeltitswellwith
blood.“Everypartofyouismadeforaman’stouch.”Hestrummedmynipplewithhis
thumb,thenpinchedthebud;itpebbledandthrobbedfromhisdelicioustorment.
Ibitmylip,wantingmore.Wemighthaveallnight,butIwasimpatienttoseeallthat
washiddenunderhisclothingandgetmyhandsonhisrockhardbody.
“Let’s take some of your clothes off, too.” I started unbuttoning his shirt, and he
didn’targue,pullinghisshirtfromhispantsandunbucklinghisbelt.
“Iaimtopleasethelady.”Whilehetoedoffhisshoesandkickedfreeofhispants,he
kepthisknowinggazefixedonmine,asifgivingmepermissiontohelphimundressbut
remindingmehewasincommand.
Ihadnoproblemswithhimtakingchargeaslongasthatendedupwithhimtaking
me.
Dekehookedhisthumbsunderhisboxersandpulledthemdownhislegs,revealing
hislong,thick,andwonderfullyerect,cock.
Undoing the last button of his shirt, I pushed the material aside and gazed at the
impossibly broad shoulders and smooth sun-bronzed expanse of muscle and sinew
taperingdowntoataut,flatabdomen.HewasareallifeAmericanversionofanancient
Greekstatue.
Andforthisonenight,hewasallmine.
Ilaunchedmyselfathim,wrappingmyarmsaroundhisneckandkissinghimwitha
sense of desperation stemming from years of waiting for this very moment. His hunger
matchedmineashefoldedhisarmsaroundme,liftingmehighsoIcouldwrapmylegs
aroundhiswaist.
He kissed me back. No. No, it was more than that, more carnal. He ravished my
mouth with demanding pressure. Kissing, nipping at my lips, plunging his tongue inside
mymouth.Deketookwhathewanted,claimingmybody,demandingmycapitulation.
Yet the bunching of his muscles under my hands and the way he held me, firmly
enough I was made aware of the underlying strength but never hurting me, was further
proofthismanwasintotalcontrolofeverymomentweshared.
The next moment, I felt myself pressed into the mattress with his weight on top of
me.Grabbingmyhands,heheldthemabovemyhead.“Nowyou’regoingtobehaveand
letmeexplore.”Hekeptonehandonmywristsandloweredhimselfdownmybody,his
lips on my breasts, kissing, licking my nipples, making tiny bites over my ribs and my
side.
“But I don’t want to behave.” Far from it, in fact. I tugged against his grip, but he
heldmeeasily.
Allthewhile,hepinchedmyothernipple,thenstrokedhisfingersdownmysideand
hip,furtherdownovermythigh,beforeglidinghisfingertipsoverthesensitivefleshatthe
topofmyinnerthigh.Stroking,drawingcircles.Eachcaresseverclosertomypussy.
Needshotthroughme,spreadingtomypussyasmyclitpulsedwithmyarousal.
I opened my legs for him, wanting his touch at the same time I held my breath in
anticipation.
“That’sit,beautiful.”Hereleasedmywristsandshiftedtoliebetweenmylegs,his
headnowovermypussy.“Youshavehere?”
“Wax at a beauty spa. I like the feeling of being bare.” Why did telling him this
informationfeellikeanaughtyconfession?
I reached down, running my hands over his short hair and loved the way his
shoulderspushedmylegsevenwiderapart.
His fingertip traced over one outer lip and I drew in a quick breath. “Nice and
smooth.”Hiswarmbreathcaressedmypussylikeawhisperedendearment.“Andwet.”
Usingbothhands,hespreadmypussylipswide.“Let’sseehowyoutaste.”
Deketrailedalineofkissesfromoneinnerthightomypussy,fanningtheflamesof
myhunger.Thenasweepofhistongueonmylabiabeforehecircledmyclit,lickingthe
sidesanddippingintomycore.“Sofuckingsweet.”Heranhistonguethelengthofmy
pussy,stoppingjustbeforemyclit.“Icouldeatyouforhours.”
I felt the pull on the hood of my clit and I tensed, holding my breath…waiting,
wanting.
Dekeflickedhistongueoverthetightbundleofnerves.Ijolted,liftingmyhipsoff
thebedbeforehepresseddownwithhisforearmstoholdmeinplace.Anotherflick,and
another.Thenhislipsclosedovermyclitashesuckeditintohismoutheversogently.A
swirlingmixofsensationfireddeepinmycore,gainingmomentumasDekelickedand
suckled,teasingmeonemomentanddrivingmetotheedgeofclimaxthenext.
Ipressedmyheadbackintothepillow.“Oh,Jesus,don’ttortureme.Please,Deke.”
Dragging my nails over his scalp, I dug my heels into the mattress as everything deep
inside me tightened. I gripped the bed sheets, twisting them as Deke brought me to my
peakwithaflurryofquick,hardlicks.
Pleasureignitedmyclit,sendingmeflyingaswavesofpureecstasypulsedthrough
mycore.MythighmusclesshookasDekestrokedmyclitwithteasinglicks,forcingme
torideoutmyreleaseuntilthemeresttouchofhistonguewastoooverwhelming.
Ilaythere,clitpulsing,mindnumb,alreadynearlyshatteredfromthemostexplosive
orgasmofmylife.
Deke moved to lie above me, his weight on his forearms. His gaze swept over me.
“YourfacewhenyoucomeisthemostbeautifulI’veeverseenyou.”Loweringhishead,
hecapturedmymouth,kissingmesoundly.
I gripped his shoulders, loving the way his muscles bunched under my touch as he
supported his weight with his arms. Holding him, his hard body against my soft curves,
wassowonderfullyerotic.Allthemorereasontofrownwhenhemovedtogetupoffthe
bed.“What?”
“Condom.”
“Ah.” Of course, I’d forgotten in the heat of the moment and watched Deke as he
openedhiswallet,pulledoutacrinkledfoilpacketandsuitedup.
He climbed back on the bed and covered me with his body before using a knee to
gentlypushmylegsapart.Hisgazeflaredwithundisguisedarousal.“Iwanttofeelthose
nailsofyoursonmybackwhenImakeyoucomeagain,Soph.”
“Icanmakethathappen.”Linkingmyarmsaroundhistorso,Itracedmyfingersover
hisbackandtuckedmyheadintohisneck.
Inonesmoothmotion,Dekeburiedhimselfdeepinsideme.
“OhmyGod.”Igaspedatthesuddenoverwhelmingfullness.
“We’ve got all night, baby.” Deke eased himself out, then back in with slow, small
thrusts.“There’ssomanywaysI’mgoingtomakeyoucomeforme.”Withexpertcare,he
increasedthetempo,thefeelofhimsohardandintimateashiscockrubbedagainstthe
walls of my pussy. Nerve endings fired to life, heating with pleasure, with his taking of
me.
“Show me, Deke. Make me yell your name.” I wrapped my legs around him and
liftedmyhips,givinghimgreaterpenetration.
“Fuck, yes.” He drove deeper, filling me with his thick hardness. Each pounding
thrustshotasizzlingtorrentofpleasurealongmycore.
Igaspedforbreath,myheadbetweenhisneckandshoulder,myfingersdigginginto
hisback,holdingoninadesperatedesirenottogiveintoosoon.Iwantedthismomentto
last, this precise moment of exquisite joy and inescapable torment as every sensation
thrilledme.
Dekechangedtheangleofhisthrust,rubbingrightovermyg-spotashemovedhis
handbetweenourbodiesandpressedhisthumbdownhardonmyclit.
“Deke,oh,myGod!”Mymindhazed.Colorexplodedbehindmyeyes.Mymuscles
clenched around his cock as overwhelming spasms of pleasure wracked my body. Over
andoveragain,Dekepoundedintomewithhard,drivingthrusts.Iclawedathisback,bit
hisshoulder,andstillIcouldn’tgetenoughofhim.
Hisclaimingofmewasutterlydevastatingandso,sowonderful.
Stillridingmyownclimax,Ifelthisbigbodytenseabovemeandlookeduptosee
thecordedmusclesinhisthroatstrainingashebitbackacurse.“Christ,Sophie,you’reso
fuckingunbelievablytight.”
Andhecouldn’tfightanylonger.
Femininepridefilledmychestwithaburstofutterjoy.Iwantedtopushhislimitsas
muchashe’ddecimatedmine.Isqueezedmymusclesaroundhim,lovingtheroughness
ofhisansweringgrowl.
“You’llregretthatmovewhenwestartthesecondround.Icanbea—”Hebrokeoff,
his breathing hard as he bit out another curse. “—merciless…aahhh…bastard.” Deep
tremorsshookhisbody.DekegroanedandIgazed,mesmerized,ashismagnificentbody
shudderedwiththethroesofhisrelease.
Iheldhimaswerodeoutourpassion.SatisfactionsangthroughmybodyandIlay
there,languidandthoroughlytaken.
Dekeeasedhimselfoutofmeandrolledtotheside.Heliftedhishandtostrokemy
hair.“You’refullofsurprises,Soph.”
Iturnedtofacehim,asmilebeginningonmyface,butasuddenwetnessbetweenmy
legshadmesittingup.MyheartpoundedasIrealizedwhatwashappening.
“What’swrong?”Dekeleveredhimselftositbesideme.
“I’mwet.Thewrongkindofwet.”Ijumpedoffthebedandranoutoftheroomto
thebathroomnextdoor,feelingstickinessdowntheinsideofmythighs.
Dekecursedloudlyinthebedroom,andIheardhisfootstepsbehindme.
Freakinghell.
I grabbed a handful of Kleenex and wiped myself. Sure enough, my fears were
confirmed.
“Fuck, I’m sorry, Soph.” Deke’s pained expression likely mirrored my own. “The
condom broke.” He grabbed some Kleenex and wrapped the spent condom before
throwingitinthesmalltrashbasketbesidethevanity.
I threw the Kleenex in the toilet and flushed. “It’s not your fault, Deke.” And it
wasn’t.“Thesethingshappen.”Iforcedasmileonmyface.“Besides,I’veonlystopped
takingthepillacoupleofweeksago.MydocadvisedIneededabreakaftertakingitfor
solong.”
I’dheardstoriesthatitwashardtobecomepregnantforafewmonthsafterbeingon
thepillaslongasIhad.Wasthatjustanurbanmyth?MygirlfriendJanicehadconfidedin
methatshe’dhadascareoncewithatorncondomandshehadn’tgottenpregnant.
Idecidedpositivethinkingwasthebestsolution.
WhatelsecouldIdorightnow?
Deke drew me into his arms and studied my face. “Soph, if anything happens, I
promiseI’ll—”
“I’lltrackyoudownanddemandashotgunwedding.”Ilaughedinwardlyattheidea.
Notthisguy,amanwhowantedlittleornotiestothepastandwasplanningtomoveonin
acoupleofdays?Ilaidakissonhischestandgavehimawrysmile.“There’snopointin
panicking.”Ashisgazeremainedconcerned,Iadded,“Butthankyou.Iappreciatewhat
you’resaying,Deke.”
Hestudiedmeamomentlongerbeforeseemingsatisfiedbymyanswer.“Justsoyou
know.”Droppingakissonmyforehead,hesqueezedmetight.“Rightnow,webothneed
ashower.”
He lifted my chin with his finger and kissed me with enough pressure to leave me
giddy.Thismanhadalwaysbeenbyprotector,fromdefendingmeagainstschoolbullies,
toreassuringmeoverthescareofatorncondom.“Let’sgetyoucleanedup,baby.”
Weprobablycouldhavehadfunintheshowerandbeencreativeinourlovemaking,
butafterthesoberingexperiencewiththecondom,themoodshiftedtogettingcleanand
dry.Butthatdidn’tstopDekefromcaringformeinhistouchandattentiontodetailashe
washedeveryinchofmybody.
By the time he’d dried me and carried me back to the bedroom, my nerves had
calmed,andallIwantedwastobeheldinhisarms.
Idon’tknowwhichoneofusgottosleepfirst,butlyingwithmybacktohisfront
and his arms wrapped around me, I wouldn’t have traded the night for anything in the
world.
Whatever happened tomorrow, or in the days after, I’d never regret this night with
Deke.
Deke
The smell of percolating coffee filled the kitchen as I scanned the contents of the
fridgeandthemeagersuppliesI’dpurchasedwhenI’darrivedThursdaynight.
Aloafofbread,cheese,milk,coffeeandbeer.NotexactlyabuffettoofferSophie,
whowasstillsoundasleepupstairs.
Damn,shehadlookedcuteashell,cuddledupunderthecovers,herfacesoftinsleep
andherhairspilledoutoverthepillow.
WakingupnexttoSophiehadbeenlikelivingafantasy.Thegirlofmydreams,the
onewhohadalwayshadmyheartandsoul,wasrightthereinmyarms.Apreciousgift.
OneIdidn’tdeserve.HowmanytimeshadIimagineddefyingtheoddsandhavingthat
momentwithher?
Butassunlightstreamedthroughtheblinds,IwasremindedmytimewithSophiehad
an end date. One I’d imposed to protect us both from giving in to any urge to take this
beyond what it was—one night. I’d never lied that I was moving on. If anything, my
leavingreinforcedmystancethatSophiewasbetteroffstayingawayfromme.
I’d always been an early riser, and the military had strengthened that trait. Not
wanting to wake Sophie, I’d used the bathroom to dress in jeans, black t-shirt, sweater,
andmyfavoritepairofboots.
Nowinthekitchen,Iclosedthefridge.TherewasnowayIwasservingSophiedry
toastandasliceofcheeseforbreakfast.
SearchingthroughwhatIrememberedwasthekitchen’sjunkdrawer,Ifoundapen
andgrabbedanoldenvelopelayingnearthestackofoutdatedphonebooksononeofthe
counters.AfterwritingSophieanote,sayingI’dgoneouttogetussomebreakfast,Ileft
themessageonthetableandheadedtothedoor,grabbingmyleatherjacketontheway.
Carefulnottomaketoomuchnoise,Iclosedthefrontdoorandwenttowalkdown
theporchsteps.
“Whatthehellareyoudoing,Deke?”
I turned to see Rob, dressed in jeans and a flannel checked shirt under his jacket,
sittingononeoftheoldwoodenoutdoorchairs.
Thetightexpressiononhisfacetoldmehisquestionwasn’treferringtowhereIwas
headedthismorning.
Fuck.
“Rob—”
“She’s my little sister.” Rob stood, his tone pissed as he sprang from the chair.
“You’rehomeonedayandyou’refuckingher?”
IstiffenedattheinsulttoSophie.“Watchyourmouth,”Iwarnedinaharshvoice.
Rob’s snort of disgust didn’t bode well. “Christ, Deke.” He shook his head. “Last
nightyoutoldAndyandmeyouweremovingon,planningonrentingoutthehousehere,
andmakinganewlife,workingforsomeprivatesecurityfirmbasedinDenver.Timefora
clear break from the past. I get it, what with all the shit that went down here when you
were growing up. Then today, I swing by my parents’ house for a coffee before I start
workandfindoutfromMomSophie’sherewithyou.”
“That’snoneofyourbusiness,man.”
Steppingforward,Robgotinmyface.“She’s.My.Little.Sister.”Hepunctuatedeach
wordwithahardpushwithhishandagainstmychest.Thegesturewasn’tRoblettingoff
steam;itwasachallenge.
Icouldhavedisabledhim,hadthemanontheground,buthewastheguyI’dgrown
upwith.Sophie’sbrother.
More than that, I hated the look of betrayal in his eyes. I’d broken a bond of trust
betweenus,crossedalinebysleepingwithSophie.
I’dtakensomethingpureandcorruptedherwithmytouch.
Hadn’tIusedthatsameargumenttokeepmydistancefromheralltheseyears?
“Whatwereyougoingtodo?Giveherakissandsendheronherway?”Robshook
hishead,hisvoicedrippingwithscorn.“Youknowshe’sheroworshippedyousincewe
werekids.Nomatterwhatshesays,youleavingisgoingtobreakherheart,yousonofa
bitch.”
Robthrewapunch.Iducked,hisswingcatchingnothingbutair.
Rising,Igrabbedhimbythefrontofhisjacketandforcedhimbackagainstthewall
nearthefrontdoor.
Gone was any trace of our childhood bond. This was a protective brother facing
downthemanwho’dsleptwithhissister.
Robgrippedmyarmsandtriedtopushbackwithallhismight.ButIwasstronger,a
trainedfighter.
“I’dneverpurposelyhurt,Sophie.”PullingRobawayfromthewall,Islammedhim
backwithabonejarringshove.Heansweredwithan‘oooff’soundandglaredbackatme,
knowinghewascaught.Ipressedmyadvantage.“Youdon’tknowmeatallifyouthink
I’dbesofuckingcallous.”
“Jesus, man,” Rob shouted. “You’ve got one fucked up version of your self-worth.
You think she’d sleep with you and then shrug it off like she’d given you a one-time
specialgoodbye?”
Istaredback,notwantingtohearhiswords,butknowingtheywerethetruth.Atleast
thepartaboutSophienotbeingsocarefreewithheremotions.
Fuck.
Yes,Sophiehadtoldmeshewasfinewithonenight.Hell,shehadinitiatedtheidea.
AndI’dbeenclearIwasmovingontoDenver.But…thiswasSoph.
Ifuckingshouldhaveknownbetter.
Ourheadsturnedtowardthesoundofthefrontdooropening.
“What’s going on?” Sophie stepped through the doorway, dressed in her top and
jeansshehadwornlastnight,herhairmussedandhereyeswideatthescenethatgreeted
her.
LettinggoofRob’sjacket,Imovedback.“That’sbetweenRobandme.”
“Bullshit,”shesnapped.Herbrowngaze,brightwithanger,flashedbetweenRoband
me.“Thisisaboutmebeinghere,soI’dsayI’mfullyinvestedinthisconversation.”
“Sophie,” Rob said in a calm voice as he reached out to take her arm. “You don’t
evenhaveacoaton.It’sfreezingouthere.”
The woman we both adored snatched her arm away from her brother, grabbed her
coatfromthestandinthehallwayandfocusedherangeronme.“Didyoutellhimstaying
herewasmychoice?ThatI’mtheonewhopushedforwhathappenedlastnight?”
Iwantedtotakeherinmyarms,kissherangerawayandneverlethergo,butRob
wasright.Sophie’sheartwasinvestedinwhathadhappenedbetweenus.HowmuchIhad
noidea.Butitmadenodifference.Ihadoneoption.Thatwasformetomakeherpassage
ofmovingonfromlastnightaseasyaspossible.
Using all my training on shutting down my emotions, I focused on achieving my
goal.
“Itdoesn’tmatterwhoinstigatedwhathappened.”Iignoredthewaysheblinkedat
my flat tone. Keeping my expression blank, I continued. “Last night was great. We had
fun. Now I need the house to myself so I can make plans to have the place cleared out
afterIleave.”
Thusremovinganytraceofanyonewhohadlivedhere.
Iwatchedthewayshestruggledtoswallow.“Youdon’thavetodothis,Deke,”she
said,hervoicesoft,fullofreproach.“You’renotthisman.You’renotabastard.”
Myguttwisted.Ofcourseshe’dassumedIwasdoingsomenobleactofpushingher
away.Partiallytrue,butthefactwasIwasnogoodforher.
I moved toward the front door, using my bulk to force her to step aside. “Not sure
what you’re talking about, but nobody makes me do something I don’t want, Sophie.” I
crushedtheurgetokissheronelasttimeandmovedtoenterthehouse.
Ifeltahandonmyarmandstilledunderhertouch.“Goodbye,Deke.”Shewhispered
as she rose on tip toe and left a feather-light kiss on my jaw, before turning away and
headingdownthestairs.
Agut-churningacheconsumedme,burningintomysoulandleavingmebarelyable
tospeak.“Goodbye,Soph.”
NomatterwhereI’dbeenintheworldorhowlongsinceourlastcontact,I’dalways
hadtheluxuryofknowinginsomesmallwaySophiewasstillinmylife,tiedtomewith
thishouseandoursharedmemoriesaskidsgrowingup.
As I walked down the hallway I refused to look back. The sound of Sophie’s
retreating footsteps on the porch heralded not only her leaving, but me losing the one
preciousthinginmylife.
Deke
Droppingmypackonthegroundbesideme,Isatonthebenchinourlockerroomat
MarshallSecurity.BonewearyfromatenmilerunwithmyteammatesintheColorado
Mountains while wearing a full pack, every muscle in my body ached. The kind of
satisfyingachethatcamefromknowingI’dgivenmyselfasolidworkout.
Igrabbedmycanteenfrommypackandtookadrinkofcoolwater.
“Goodruntoday.”EliFord,afellowformerSEALliketherestofourmaincrew,sat
besidemeandstartedunlacinghisbootsandgettingreadyforashower.
“ForyearsIwasusedtoseeingyouruglybaldhead,”Ijoked.“It’sweirdseeingyou
now with that dark hair.” It wasn’t long, only an inch maybe. Eli was growing it in line
withtherequirementsforanupcomingmission.
“I’dtellyouthebrandofshampooI’musing,butthenyou’dhavethesamebodyand
fullness, and I’d get jealous and have to kill you.” Eli’s blank expression was a perfect
matchforhisdrysenseofhumor.
“I’m fine with the just-washed look I get from my soap, thanks” I chuckled at his
answeringgrinandstartedstrippingoffmytraininggear.Myhairwasstillmilitaryshort,
but my trimmed beard was a new addition. The guys had teased me about becoming a
hipster.AtleasttheyhadteasedmeuntilIputRyderNolanonhisass.
Thatmomentatall,blondmanjoinedusinthelockerroom.
Speakofthedevil.
Ryder dropped his pack on the ground in front of his locker. Lance Marshall, our
employerandFormerSEALTeamLeader,andJakeCarterfollowedbehindhim.
“Ican’tbelievewe’restilldoingthisshittwoyearsafterleavingtheSEALs.”Ryder
sat on the bench opposite me. “And since our investments are paying so well, we don’t
evenneedthesejobs,forfuck’ssake.”
“You need to work out to keep that low percentage body fat you’re so proud of.”
Lance grinned at Ryder. “Isn’t that part of your arsenal for impressing the ladies,
Hollywood?”
IchuckledasRydergaveLancethemiddlefingerattheuseofournicknameforhim.
Blond, well-built, handsome and with buckets of charm, the man had women falling for
himateveryturn.
“Bytheway,IfieldedacallforyoufromsomegirlcalledKimberleythismorning.”
JakeCartershotRyderanimpatientlook.“Rangonthemainswitchandwasputthrough
to our communications room.” Jake’s frown showed his displeasure at the breakdown in
protocolfromMarshallSecurities’adminteam.Nodistractingcallsfromwomentryingto
hookupwithoneoftheguyswerepermittedwhenwewereworkinginthecomsroom.
“Shewantsyoutoknowshe’stotallyintoyou.”Jake’sdarkbrowneyeswentwideashe
battedhiseyelashesdramaticallyatRyder—asighttoseesincetheguywasastoughas
theycame.“Andshehopesyou’llbeatsomenightclubtomorrownightbecauseitwillbe
sosupercoolifyoumadeitthere.”
Lance Marshall rolled his eyes. At forty, with short brown hair and the hard, lean
physiqueofamantenyearsyounger,hewasnotonlyourboss,butlikeabigbrothertous
all.Onethatkickedourbuttsontheexercisemattswithdevastatingprecisiononaregular
basis.
“Doweevenwanttoknowhowyoumetthisone?”Iaskedinabemusedtone.
Rydersighedandtossedonebootonthegroundbeforeunlacingtheother.“Itmust
behardfortherestofyou,lonelyandunloved,whileI,withmywitandgoodlooks,grab
alltheattention.”
Jake raised a brow before he removed his sweat-stained t-shirt. “I’m not alone,
remember?”
Ryder huffed a laugh as he grabbed his shaving kit. “Yeah, you were lucky that a
sweetheart like Charlotte fell for you. Of course, you had to practically kidnap the poor
womanfirst,buthey,needsmust…”
I remembered that particular mission well. Already two months had passed since
then,andJakehadputaringonCharlotte’sfingertomakehisclaimonherlegal.Ryder
wascorrect.CharlottewasindeedasweetheartandJakealuckyman.
Farfromoffended,Jakelaughedashegrabbedhistowelandheadedfortheshowers.
“It’s a testament to my idea of loyalty that I put up with you bunch of bastards,”
Rydergrousedashe,too,headedtotheshowers.
“It’sagoodthinghe’soneofthebestathisjoborI’dhavesavedmyselfaloadof
angstandsnappedhisnecklongago.”Lanceflickedhisblue-eyedgazemyway.“Now,
whataboutyou?”
“Youwanttosnapmyneck?”Iaskedinawrytone.
“Nottoday.”Lancesatonthebenchoppositeandbalancedhiselbowsonhisknees
asheregardedme.“Igotamessageyouneededtoaskmesomething?”
Inodded.“Ineedsomepersonaltime.GottoheadbacktoOhio.”
“Everythingokay?”
“Yeah. I’ve been renting out my old man’s house these past two and half years.
Seemslikeagoodtimenowtosell.There’safewrepairsIwanttohandleandpaperwork
Ineedtosigninperson.”
Andmaybeaghostortwotobury.Metaphoricallyspeaking.
I’d heard through the real-estate agent who looked after the old man’s house that
EmilyandDougHawkinshadsoldtheirhouseandmovedtoFlorida,escapingthebitterly
cold winters in Rushville in their retirement. Not that I’d had any contact with Emily
herselfsincemylastvisitbackhome.Sleepingwithherdaughterwaslikelyabridgetoo
farforEmily.
AdecisionIunderstood.
With their parents’ house sold, I wouldn’t likely bump into Rob or Sophie for the
coupleofweeksIwasthere.
“Noproblem,Deke.”Lancenodded.“Howlongdoyouthinkyou’llbegone?”
“Couple of weeks.” The repairs needed weren’t major, but I didn’t want to
underestimate the time I’d need. Good thing was, with it being summer, the weather
wouldn’tholdmeback.“I’dliketoheadoutinthenextweekifpossible.”
“Done.”Lanceroseandheadedtohislocker.“Ifyouneedanything,call.I’mhappy
togiveRydersometimeofftogohelp.”Hegaveadrylaugh.“Infact,Imayoffertopay
himtogoifthatguaranteedwe’dgetaweekfreeofcallsfromgirlslikeKimberley.”
Lordhelpme.“ThefemalepopulationofRushville,Ohio,wouldneverrecoverfrom
suchanincursion.”
AsLancechuckled,Isnatchedupmytowelandheadedtotheshowers.Mytripback
to Rushville would be complicated enough without adding Ryder and his movie-star
powerwiththeladiestothemix.
IwasgratefulSophie’sparentshadsoldtheirhouse.IlovedRyderlikeabrother,but
the mere idea of Sophie meeting him had me thinking of all the ways I could kill my
friend.
Deke
ThesummersunbeatdownonmybarebackasItossedthelastoftherottentimber
intothewheelbarrow.Withadeepsenseofsatisfaction,Istudiedthenowbareareabeside
theshedinmybackyard.
Mybackyard.Notmyoldman’s.
This was my home I was selling. Had been my home for two years. I needed to
remindmyselfBoydWilliamshadbeendeadandburiedawhilenow.
I’darrivedherefromDenverafterdrivingmyDodgetruckfortwentyhours,thetrip
brokenupwithanovernightstayinamotelalongtheway.Sincethen,I’dthrownmyself
intomakingalistofwhatneededtoberepairedorsprucedup.
Thepropertymanagerhadmadesurethetenantskepttheyardingoodshape.That
leftmewithclearingupitemsthathadbeenleftherefromthetimebeforeBoyd’sdeath.
Standingundertheshadeofanoldelmtree,Istudiedtheoutsidewoodenexteriorof
the two-story house. Now looking slightly worn in an old coat of faded yellow paint, it
wasdueforanewcoatofpaint,andI’dbookedacrewtostartintwodays.ThecolorsI’d
chosen were light gray with a white trim, and a bright glossy yellow for the front door.
ActuallythecolorshadfancynameslikeLemoncelloDevine,butyellowdiditforme.
I’dplayedwiththeideaofwhethertobotherrepainting,buttherealestateagenthad
advised it would add three times the cost of getting the job done to sale price of the
property,soIdecidedtogoaheadwiththejob.
Grabbingthehandlesofthebarrow,Isteeredmyloaddownthesidepassagetothe
hired dumpster taking up space in my front yard and began emptying out the load of
timber. I’d paid a property manager to empty the house after Boyd’s death. The woman
had organized and boxed up any personal papers, and I’d received them soon after.
EverythingelsefrommychildhoodhomehadbeeneitherdonatedtoGoodwillortossed.
AsfarasIcouldtell,Boydhadthrownoutanythingthathadbeenmineyearsago,likely
just after I’d left to join the Navy. The dumpster I’d hired for this job was being used
purelyforbuildingmaterial.
Thefact that therewas not atrace of who Iwas from beforeI was eighteenhadn’t
surprisedme.That’sthekindofpersonmyoldmanwas.Spiteful.Mean.Butitdidremind
methatmemorieswereprecious.Sometimesthat’sallwehadleft.
Thesoundofacardoorclosingdirectlyacrossthestreethadmelookingtowardthe
Hawkinsoldhouse.
Ifroze.
Awomanwithlongbrownhairwastalkingonthephoneassheretrievedasmallbox
fromthetrunkofabluesedan.Shewassmiling,andherlaughwascarriedonthesummer
breeze.
Sophie.
Butherparentshadsoldthehouse.Therealestateagenthadeventoldmetheprice.
WhatwasSophiedoinghere?
I stood there, staring, taking in every second I could of the woman I’d tried—and
failed—toremovefrommylife.Ifitwerepossible,shelookedmorebeautifulthanbefore.
Her curves were fuller, and in the sunshine, she had a glow about her, a spark that was
emphasized by the backdrop of fresh blooms surrounding her in what used to be her
mother’sgarden,butstillobviouslywell-tendedbythenewowner.
Icouldn’tlookawayfromher.Hell,Ishouldhavebeencursingandmakingaretreat,
butIgavemyselfthisonemomenttodrinkinherbeauty.
Endingherphonecall,sheslippedhercellinherbackpocketandclosedthetrunk.A
burst of breeze whipped her hair around her face. Turning to push her hair away, she
caughtsightofme.
Herstunnedexpressionmirroredmyshockfrommomentsago.
TherewasnowayIcouldwalkbackinsidethehouselikenothinghadhappened.In
allhonesty,Ididn’twantto.Sure,Ihadquestionsastowhyshewashere,butSophiewas
there,andIwasaselfishenoughbastardtotakeachanceforafewmomentswithher.
Myt-shirtwashangingonatreelimbinthebackyard,soI’djusthavetowalkacross
toherwearingmyjeansandboots.
Drawingcloser,IwatchedherchestriseandfallasshetookwhatIguessedwerea
fewsteadybreaths.Thelookofshockinhergazegavewaytosomethingakinto…panic?
Aheavyfeelinglodgedinmychest.Panicwasn’tsomethingIeverexpectedfromSophie.
Istoppedsixfeetfromthewhitepicketfence,notwantingtocrowdher.Wasseeingme
thatintimidatingaprospect?
“Sophie.” I deliberately used my name for her, a way of reminding her I wasn’t a
physicalthreat.
“Deke.”Shelookedovermyshouldertowardthehouseandthenbacktome.“You’re
movingin?”
Ididn’tmissthetoneofregretinhervoice.
Ourlittlereunionhadfuck-upwrittenalloverit.
“No,gettingtheplacereadytosell.”
Her sigh could only be described as one of relief. “How long are you planning on
staying?”
Iguessshewantedmeoutofhereassoonaspossible.Istompeddownmyirritation.
Afterall,I’mthebastardwhobrokeherheart.WhatelsecouldIexpect?
“Acoupleofweeksatmost.”Butthatdidn’texplainwhyshewashere.Glancingat
the two-story house with its white gingerbread trim and blue painted exterior I had a
questionofmyown.
“IwastoldyourparentshadsoldtheirhouseandmovedtoFlorida.”
“Theydid.Nearlyayearago.Iboughtthehouse.”
“Irememberhowmuchyoulovedtheplace.”Playingdollsonthestairsasatinykid,
makingacubbyintheatticandthenjoiningRob,Andyandmeinthetreehouseherdad
builtinthehugeoakinthebackyard.Thehousehadalwaysbeenaplaceofwonderand
happinessforSophie.“I’mhappyforyouthatyou’remakingityourhomenow.”
Hergazesoftened,ifonlyforafewseconds.“Thankyou,Deke.”Hervoicesounded
husky,andforacoupleofseconds,itwasasifthepainanddistancesinceourlastparting
hadmeltedaway.
But the next instant, she blinked, and the emotional wall between us was back in
place.
She cast a glance over her shoulder at the house, then turned quickly back to me.
“Look,I’msorry.ButIhavetogetbackinside.”Shebackedaway.“I’vegotsomething
onthestove.Goodluckwithsellingthehouse.”
Istoodthereassheturnedandpracticallyranintothehouse.
AsIwalkedbacktomyhouse,IremindedmyselfIdeservedprobablyfarworsefrom
herthanthereservedgreetingI’dreceived.
Sophiewasmakingalifeforherselfinahomesheloved.ThebestIcoulddoforher
wasstayawayandlethercontinuedoingsoinpeace.
Sophie
I shoved the front door closed behind me and managed to get to the stairs and sit
before my legs gave way beneath me. Sweat trickled down my back, despite the fact I
hadn’tperformedanyfeatsofendurance.
Claspingmyshakinghands,Ibattledtogathermyself.
Dekewashere.
InRushville.
Livingrightacrossthestreetfrommyhouseandthemostpreciousthinginmylife.
Iclosedmyeyesanddraggedinashakybreath.
Itwouldbeokay.Ijustneeded…what?Animaginarydisappearingmachinetokeep
ushidden?
ThepartIdidn’tunderstandwasDekenotmentioningmineorRob’smessages,the
oneswe’dleftforhimatthatsecurityfirmheworkedforagesagowhenIdiscoveredmy
worldhadturnedupsidedown.
Heactedasifwe’dnevertriedtogetintouch.
Atthetime,I’dtakenhimnotreturningourmessagesasmycuetogoonandlivemy
lifewithouthimhavinganypresence.I’dbeenshockedbyhisbehavior,buthe’dmadehis
decision.
Iguesshissilencetodaywashiswayofmakingthatfactabundantlyclear.
Thatdidn’tmeanI’dallowmyselforthoseIlovedtobevulnerablearoundhim.
Or to any other potential danger that lurked, be it out in the open or hidden in the
shadows.
MymindwenttothephonecallIreceivedlatelastnight.
That voice. I guessed a male’s but electronically disguised like they do whistle-
blowersonTV.“You’llbemineintheend,Sophie.Youcan’tignoremeforever.”
I’d hung up on the caller and phoned Rob. Ten minutes later Andy had come over
andtakenapolicereport.He’dendedhisvisitwithahugandapromisehe’ddowhathe
could,plusorganizeaunittodrivebywheninthearea.Ifanyonewaswatchingthehouse,
they’dseethepolicepresenceandmaybethinktwicebeforecallingagain.Itwasn’tmuch,
butatleastIfeltI’dtakensomeaction.WithRobandAndybothintheknow,Ifeltless
helpless.
Butintheend,IwasresponsibleformysafetyandthesafetyofthoseIcaredfor.
Iwouldprotectwhatwasmine.
Gripping the stair rail, I stood, pleased that my legs no longer wobbled and headed
intothelivingroom.
“Mommycome.Mommycome.”Noahpointedatmeashegrippedthesidesofhis
enclosed play area with his free hand. Big for his age at twenty-one months, with thick,
lightbrownhair,hewasdressedinredshortsandacutet-shirtwithabluetrainstitched
onthefront.AhugegrinappearedonhissweetfaceasIbenttopickhimup.
“I’m happy to see you, too, sweetie.” I buried my face close to him, inhaling the
scent of a freshly bathed kiddo—lavender bath wash and baby powder—and kissed his
head. I looked down at the small orange bear—Gordon—he’d been given as a gift from
RobandhiswifeJaniethedayhewasborn.
Rob’s five-year-old daughter, Mindy, had come up with the name and it had stuck.
NoahadoredGordonanddidn’tgoanywherewithouthisteddy.
“WereyouplayingwithGordon?”
“Gordie tired.” Noah shook his head either in sadness or a measure of disgust I
wasn’t sure. His sigh was heartfelt and I had to chuckle. Hearing me laugh was like a
greenlightforNoah,whoburstintoafitofgiggles.
Istoodthere,holdingmyson,thankingGodfortheblessinghe’dbestoweduponme
withthislittleboy.
Noahlookedupatme,hiseyesbrightandfullofjoy.
Eyesthesamegrayashisfathers.
Looking out beyond the sheer curtains and blinds of the living room window, I
watchedDekeloadlengthsofwoodintothedumpsterparkedonhisfrontlawn.
Tall,possiblylookingevenbulkierthanwhenI’dlastseenhim,henowhadabeard
thatgavehimalookofahard-asswoodsman,someoneyouwouldn’twanttomesswith,
beitonamountainorwalkingdownacitystreet.
Gathering my son closer to me so his face was pressed into my neck, I reminded
myselfofthevowI’dmadejustbeforeenteringthisroom.
Iwouldprotectwhatwasmine.
Deke
How the hell did I manage to run out of coffee in less than a week? Tossing the
empty can in the trash, I absently scratched at my beard and cursed at myself for not
havingdoneanygroceryshoppinglastnight.
I wasn’t a coffee snob—being on missions all over the world meant I was often
gratefulforwhateverIcoulddrinkatthetime—butI’dbeenworkingsomeserioushours
gettingthemajorityofthejobsdonearoundthehouse,andahitofcaffeinefirstthingin
themorningdidn’tgounappreciated.
Grabbingthekeystomytruck,Iheadedoutofthehouse.I’dreachedthebottomof
theporchstepswhenmyeyescaughtthemorningsunglintingoffsomethingatthebase
ofSophie’sfrontdoor.
Inthemilitaryyoulearnquicklyanobjectthatglintedinthesunlightcouldtakeyour
life.
Lookingaround,Isawnobodyoutsideofanyhousesorinanycarsparkedalongthe
curb.
Decidingtocheckitoutfurther,Icrossedtheroadandstoodatherfrontgate,getting
afullviewofwhatfirststolemyattention.
Arat,withalargekitchenknifestabbedthroughitsbelly,layonSophie’sfrontdoor
mat.
Mybloodchilled.
Thiswasaclearthreat.Asignleftbysomeonewantingtocauseharm.
Like anyone in my line of business, I had a concealed carry permit. My Sig Sauer
wasinanankleholsteronmyrightleg.
Igrabbedmyweaponandapproachedthesideofthehouse,checkingtomakesure
nobodywashidingtoseeherreactiontotheirhandwork.Lowhedgerowscamouflagedthe
fenceline between herand her neighbors,but I saw nosign of anyone.I turned to head
backaroundthefrontwhenIheardSophie’svoicethroughanopensidewindow.
“Listen you creep, I told you last time I don’t want you contacting me again. I’ve
alreadyreportedyourcallstothepolice.They’llbeabletotraceyourcall,andyourass
willendupinjail.”
There was a moment of silence before she spoke again. This time her voice was
raised,hertonehighandstrained.“Gofuckyourself.”Thencametheunmistakablesound
ofareceiverbeingslammedontothephone.
Ididn’tneedtohearanymoretoknowIwasgettinginsidethathouse.
NotwantingtoscareSophieanymorethanshewouldbeafewsecondsfromnow,I
slidmySigbackinmyankleholster.Afterpushingthematoutofthewaywiththetoeof
mybootandthusnotcontaminatingtheevidencewithmyfingerprints,Iknockedonher
frontdoor.
She opened the door and immediately moved to push herself up against the door,
makingitclearshehadnointentionofwelcomingmeintoherhouse.
ToobadIwasn’tdownwithherplan.
“Sophie,Idon’twanttofrightenyou,butIneedtoshowyousomething.”
She was already shaking her head before I finished speaking. “Now’s not a good
time,Deke.”
Isteppedasideandlookeddownatthefrontdoormat.Hergazefollowedmine.
“Oh.My.God.”Herhandclutchedherchestasshestaredatthegrizzlycallingcard
leftonherporch.
“Nevergonnabeagoodtimeforsomethinglikethis,Soph.”Iputahandonthedoor
andpushedfirmly,beingcarefulnottomakeherfallasshewasforcedtostepbackandlet
mein.
“Deke.” She tried to head me off as I walked into the room where I guessed she’d
takenthephonecall.ThelivingroomI’drememberedfromyearsagowasupdatedwitha
mixofcontemporaryfurnitureinshadesofcreamsandbrownsandalargeruginapattern
of blue, grey and brown geometric shapes over polished floor boards. A mix of modern
printsandfamilyphotosdottedthewalls.Theroomlookedstylish,welcoming,andlike
somethingI’dexpectfromahouseSophiemadehers.
Iwavedatthephonesittingonasidetable.“Thisthephoneyouanswered?”
Far from cooperative, Sophie shoved her hands on her hips and fired a glare that
screamedattitude.“That’snoneofyourbusiness.”
Istaredback.“Makingitmybusiness,Soph.”
She shook her head, her mouth slightly open as if she couldn’t believe her ears.
“Whatgivesyouthatright?”
“I’vecaredaboutyouforyears,woman.”
Thescoffingsoundshemadehitmelikeapunchtotheguts.“Youhaveafunnyway
ofshowingit.”
Ineededtoworkpastherangerandgettothematterathand.“Whathappenedover
two years ago doesn’t negate the fact you matter to me.” More than mattered. I’d never
stoppedknowinginmyheartshewastheoneforme.“Rightnowthere’sathreatagainst
you,andI’mamanthatdealswiththreatseveryday.Dangerousones.Sodroptheattitude
andletmehelp.”
“Thanksfortheoffer,butno.”Hertonedrippedsarcasm.“I’vebeenincontactwith
Andyandhe’sdoingwhathecan.”
“ConsideringIjustfoundadeadratonyourdoorstep,I’mthinkingwhateverAndy’s
doingisn’tgettingthejobdone.”
Shemarchedtothefrontdoorandswungitopen.“Getout.”
IcouldhavestayedwhereIwas.Shehadnochanceinhellofphysicallyforcingme
offherproperty,butwithoutanyintel,Ihadnothingtoworkwith.ButIwasn’tamanwho
gaveupuntilI’dachievedmymission.
Iwalkeduptoheratthefrontdoor,mystepsmeasured,slow,lettingherseeIwasin
nohurry.AsIstoodnexttoherabeepingsoundcamefromherjeanspocket.Shepulled
outherphone,lookedatthescreenandglancedupthestairs.
Ikeptmygazeonherface.“SomethingupstairsIneedtoinvestigate?”
ThewayherfacepaledIknewI’dhitatargetofsomekind.
Sheshovedthephonebackinherjean’spocket,herfaceamaskofstone.“Ihadan
alarmprogrammedtoremindmeIneededtophoneafriendaboutabirthdayparty.”
Isteppedforward,crowdingherspacesothatshehadtobendherneckbacktolook
upatme.“IntheSEALswe’realltrainedtotheultimatelevel,buteachofusexcelsinour
own way.” I dipped my head so my mouth was close to her ear. “Mine was breaking
people’sresistanceandlearningtheirsecrets.”
Straightening up, I watched in satisfaction as she swallowed and looked away,
refusingtomeetmygaze.“Untillater,Sophie.”Ipassedthroughthedoorway,butinmany
waysI’djustwalkedrightbackintoherlife,whethershewantedmethereornot.
Tenminuteslater,I’dendedacalltoRyder.MarshallSecuritiesanswertotheSexiest
ManAlivewasonahuntingandgatheringmission.
Another fifteen minutes, and I was walking into the old red brick building of the
RushvilleCityHall,alsohometothelocalPoliceHeadquarters.Stoppingbythereception
desk,IaskedforDetectiveAndyNeilson.
Ihadn’tbeenhereinyears.Insteadoftheoldwoodendoorthathadledtothebullpen
and desks for officers, there was now a solid looking door with a swipe card needed to
gainaccess.Notfoolproofbutastepupfromyearsago.
A minute later, Andy—his blond hair a little less unabundant than two and a half
yearsago,butotherwiselookingthesame,cameoutthroughthesecuredoor.“Deke.”His
browcreasedwithafrown,butitdisappearedsoonenough.“I’dheardfromRobyouwere
back.”Sophiehadobviouslytoldherbrother.I’ddebatedcallingRob,thoughtIwouldin
adayortwo.Now,puttingthingsoffwasamootpoint.
“Hey,Andy.”Iheldoutmyhandandthedetectivetookitinafirmgrip.“Sophietold
meyouwereinvestigatingathreateningphonecallshehadreceivedaweekago.”
Andy’s gaze narrowed a fraction. I wasn’t surprised. This guy was a cop, and he
couldtakeoffencetomebarginginandaskingquestions.
“What’syourinterest,Deke?”
“Foundadeadratonherdoorstepthismorning.”Itookamoment’spleasureinthe
wayhestraightenedhisspineatthenews.Mycomingherewasn’ttoengageinapissing
contestonwhowasthebiggestbadassontheblock.“ThenIoverheardhergettinganother
oneofthosecalls.”
“Dammit.”Andyrubbedthebackofhisneck.“Leavingtheratisanescalation.”
“I’mguessingyoudon’thaveintelfromthephonecall?”
Andy shot me wry look. “This is Rushville P.D. I put a request in to the phone
company to see if they could trace where the call came from, but I’m still waiting for a
reply.Myrequestwascategorizedasnon-urgent.”
“Recategorizeit.”
Andy’s mouth tightened at the authoritative tone of my voice. I didn’t care. Some
sickfuckerhadleftamutilatedratonSophie’sdoorstep.
“Deke,you’renottheonlyonewhocaresaboutSophie.”Hegavemealevellook.“I
appreciateyoucominghereandlettingmeknowwhathappened.Itakeityoudidn’tleave
theoffendinggiftatherdoor.”
“Kickedthematwithmyboottotheendofthepatio.”
“Good.Thanks.I’llgetapatrolcartocollectitrightaway.”
What Rushville P.D. and its limited resources could do was anyone’s guess, but
havingthemofficiallytaketheevidencewasastart.
“Right.I’llleaveyoutogetthatdone.”
“How’syourplansgoingwiththesaleofyourhouse?”
At my raised brow, he shrugged with a casual grin. “This is Rushville. Everyone
knowseveryone’sbusiness.”
Trueenough.
“Thehouseiscomingalong.I’mlistingwithShanaConnor.”
“She’sgotagoodreputationinthecounty.Youshoulddowell.”
“Goodtohear,man.Thanks.”
Andy shook my hand and turned to swipe his keycard through the lock, but swung
back,aquizzicalexpressiononhisface.“Soyou’vetalkedwithSophie?”
Intriguedathisquestion,Ikeptmytoneandexpressionneutral,asifunruffledbyhis
interest.“Acoupleoftimes.”
He nodded, studying me a moment longer before giving me a quick smile. “Good.
Okay,I’llgetthatpatrolcartoherhouse.”
Withthat,Andyswipedhiscardagainandopenedthedoor,disappearingbehindits
darkgrayexterior.
Andy’squestionregardingifI’dtalkedwithSophiehadnothingtodowithsheandI
shooting the breeze and catching up on old times. His tone indicated something else, as
if…Sophiehadsomethingtosharewithme.
Asecret.
OneAndythoughtshemighthavesharedwithme.
IturnedandranoutofCityHall,ignoringtheadmonishingshoutofthereceptionist.
TimeIfoundoutwhatSophiewashiding.
Sophie
IstoodatthelivingroomwindowandwatchedDekestrideacrosstheroadlikesome
urban mercenary dressed in a black t-shirt, black jeans and black motor-cycle boots.
Stalkinguphisdriveway,hegotinhistruckanddroveaway.
Themomenthisvehicleturnedthecornerattheendofourstreet,Iracedupstairsto
check on Noah. I nearly wept with relief when I saw he was still asleep and blissfully
unawareoftheturmoilthathadjustunfoldeddownstairs.
Iwasnofool.IknewDekewouldn’tstopdiggingforinformationonwhowascalling
me and, since I guessed it was the same person, had also left a mutilated rat on my
doorstep.
That poor creature. Rats may not be my favorite animal, but, still… I shuddered at
thememoryofhowithadsuffered.Whatkindofinsanecreepcoulddosuchathing?
DekewasrightaboutthefactIneededtogetmorehelp.
But right now, it was Deke, the most determined and capable man I’d ever known,
whoposedthegreaterthreattomeand,moreimportantly,Noah.
How ironic. He’d been my hero for longer than I cared to remember. A natural
protector,Icouldn’tfindabettermantokeepusphysicallysafe.Itwasthethreatofhim
taking my son, not to mention the fact he could break my heart—again—that had the
potentialtocripplemeemotionally.
Two and a half years ago, both Rob and I had tried to contact him, but he didn’t
respond.IknewIshouldtellhimabouthisson,andIwould,butthistime,Dekewould
havetoworktomytimetable.
Rightnow,IneededtogetoutofthishouseandgosomewhereIfeltsafe,awayfrom
Dekeandthecrazyjerkleavingdeadratsonmydoorstep.
I ran to my bedroom and, ten minutes later, had a bag packed to last me a week,
whichwasthesameamountoftimeIguessedDekehadleftinRushville.Hadn’thesaid
overaweekagothatheexpectedhisstaytolasttwoweeks?
I loaded up another container with my laptop and other papers I needed for my
freelanceeditingbusiness.Romanceauthorsmadeawesomeclientsandtheyallowedme
toworkfromhome,ormybrother’shouseifneedbe.
Another twenty minutes later, I had the car packed with all the gear I’d need for a
week’sstayatmybrother’sforNoahandI.
I’djustenteredthehousefrommylasttrippackingmycarwhenIheardacardoor
openingandclosing.
Auniformedcopheadedtowardmyfrontdoor.Cleancutwithayoungface,hegave
meareassuringsmileashenoddedingreeting.“Ma’am,DetectiveNeilsonaskedmeto
comebyandpickupsomeevidence.”Hepulledoutsomeglovesfromhispantspocket
andwhatlookedtomyuntrainedeyelikeagiantbaggie.
“Evidence?”God,hehadtomeantherat.ButhowdidAndyknow?Ihadn’tcalled
him.There’snowayhe—
Deke.HemusthavecontactedAndy.
“Right,Officer.CanIleavethattasktoyou?”
“Absolutely,ma’am.”Henodded.“DetectiveNeilsonwillbeintouch.”
“Thanks for that.” I didn’t bother hanging around and left the young officer to his
task.
I had more pressing matters bearing down on me with the impact of a Mack truck
speedingwithoutbrakesatonehundredmilesanhour.
If Andy had been in contact with Deke, then who knew what they had discussed
besidesmystalker?
I’d never specifically asked Andy not to say anything about Noah to Deke, maybe
Robhad?
Jesus,whatamess.
I ran back up the stairs and into Noah’s room. My little man was now awake and
playingwithGordoninhiscrib.“Hey,Noah,areyoureadyforatripinthecartoUncle
RobandAuntieJanie’shouse?
“Car.VoomVoom.”Hegavemeahugesmile.
Despite the tension coursing through me I couldn’t help but giggle, which
encouragedNoahtogigglerightalongwithme.
TrustmyboytohavemesmilingevenwhenIwasfeelingdesperate.
Iliftedhiminmyarms,makingsurehispreciousorangeteddywaswithus.“Okay,
wellyou,me,andGordonareheadingonout.”
“Noahout.”
“That’sright,littleman.”IsurvivedabonkontheheadwithGordonandhustledus
downthestairs.Myphoneandpursewerealreadyinthecar,alongwithNoah’sinfantcar
seat.
Ilockedthefrontdooronourwayout,notingtheyoungofficerhadjustpulledout
andwasdrivingdownthestreet.
IsuckedinabreathandloweredNoahintohiscarseatandstartedstrappinghimin.
“You can do this, Sophie.” I reminded myself as Noah held Gordon in his tiny fist
andshookthetoyupanddowninfrontofhim.
“Goingsomewhere?”
Ifroze.
Thatdeepvoice.
Igazedatmyson;hisinfectioussmilebeamedupatmeasIclutchedtheedgeofhis
carseat.
Ibackedoutofthepassengerdoorwayandmovedtoclosethedoorpartwayinan
attempttoshieldNoah.OnlythendidIcheckbehindme.
Deke stood a few feet from me, his view into the car blocked by my body and the
passengerdoor.Hisrazorsharpgazepinnedmeinplace.“Whatareyouhiding,Sophie?”
Feargrippedmelikeavise,crushingmyvoiceandrenderingmesilent.
“Stepawayfromthedoor.”
Icouldonlystareback,mylimbsrefusingtomoveasIshookmyhead.
“ThenI’llhelpyou,”hesaidinalow,measuredvoice.
His hand curled around my upper arm and firmly pulled me aside. I stumbled, not
from the force of his touch, but the almost paralyzing impact of knowing what was to
come.
“Don’tmove,”hewarned.
IwantedtolaughandreassurehimIcouldn’tevenifItried.
ThiswasthemomentI’dfirstprayedfortwoandahalfyearsagoandthendreaded
ninemonthslaterwhenIfirstheldNoahinmyarms.
Holdingmybreath,Iwaited.
Deke
WhateverthehellIexpectedtofindwhenIarrivedbackatSophie’s,seeinghercar
packedwithvariousbigtotebagsandherbentoverthebackpassengerseatobliviousto
myarrivalhadn’tbeenmyfirstguess.
What threw me more was the look of abject fear on her face when she’d turned to
confrontme.
Pulling the passenger door open as wide as possible, I leaned in to see what was
inside.
A toddler, wearing a matching t-shirt and shorts in navy with white piping, was
snuglystrappedinaninfantcarseat.
Alittleboy.
Withlightbrownhair.
Andgrayeyes.
Mylungsseizedinmychest,refusingtoexpand.
Istaredatthechildbeforeme.
Notcaringabouttheburningsensationfillingmychestasarushingsoundfilledmy
ears.
Myson.
Thislittleboywasmyson.
ArushofjoyandwondersoblindinglypotentInearlyfellonthegroundfilledmy
body.
Ididn’tknowwhatIwasdoingorhowIwassupposedtoact.
ButonethingIknewforsure.
Inthatsecond,Ifellinlovewithatinylittleperson.
I blew out a whoosh of air, my chest heaving from however long I had held my
breath.
Lifting my hand, I tentatively ran the tip of my finger over the face of a dog
embroideredonthefrontofhisshirt.
Theboyglancedatme,hisgazewideandinquisitive,asifwonderingwhatthisgiant
was before him, and the next second, he reached out a tiny hand and latched on to my
finger.“No,pleeze,”hesaid,butjudgingbyhishappygiggle,‘No’couldeasilymeanyes
inhiseyes.
Hewasastrangertomerightnow,butthatwouldchange.
“Hey there, little buddy.” I undid the straps of his harness and carefully, so very
carefully,liftedmysoninmyarmstonestlehimagainstmychest.
Nowordscoulddescribetheheart-stoppingwonderofholdinghimforthefirsttime.
“What’shisname?”Ididn’ttakemyeyesoffmychild.
“Deke,I…”Sophie’sfalteringattempttoexplainwaslikeapintothefragilebubble
keepingmyangerincheck.
“Hisname,”Irepeated,thistimemakingitanundeniablecommand.
“Noah.”
“Noah.”Irepeatedsoftly.Mysongazedupatme,recognizinghisname.
IglanceddowntoSophieasshewipedawaytearsfromhercheeks.Icouldn’tbegin
toimaginewhatshemustbefeeling.Jesus,Iwasrunningthroughagauntletofemotions
myself, but judging by the way her gaze softened whenever she gazed at Noah, it was
clearshelovedherson.
Ourson.
ImademyselfpromisetohonorthatloveforNoahasoverthenextcoupleofhours
wedealtwiththeimmediateaftermathofmydiscovery.
Onethingwascertain.
Nobodywouldkeepmefrommysoneveragain.
“We’llbringfromthecarwhatisabsolutelyessentialforNoahthenexthour.Neither
ofusisleavingthehouseuntilIhavethefullstoryofhowthishappened.”
“Fine.”Sheopenedthefrontpassengerdoorandpulledoutawoman’shandbaganda
large blue canvas bag with various zippers and compartments. “This has everything we
needinanemergency.”LookingbackatNoah’sinfantseat,shethenflickedhergazeto
me. “You’ll need to grab Gordon, his orange teddy. He takes Gordon with him
everywhere.”
“Right.” I snagged the teddy and settled the toy between my chest and Noah, who
chattedhappilytohimselfashesqueezedhisfurryfriend.TherewassomuchIhadtoget
my head around. Like the fact his favorite toy was an orange teddy named Gordon. I
wanted to thank Sophie for sharing that information, but at the same time I resented the
factshehadknownandIhadn’t.
ThebittertruthwasIwouldbereliantonhersharingmorefactsaboutourson.
Following her up to the house, I waited while she unlocked the front door and
followedbehindherassheenteredandheadedforthelivingroom.
A play area with a box of toys was set up next to the sofa. I lowered Noah to the
floor, and he immediately started setting up brightly colored building blocks into a mini
skyscraper.
That activity lasted about half a minute until he decided to sort through his box of
toysandputtheminpilesaccordingtosomesecretformulainhishead.
“He’s got walking mastered.” I sat in one of the easy chairs and watched as Noah
walkedtoallthedifferentpilesoftoysandstudiedtheircontents.
“Hewasconfidentonhisfeetbytwelvemonths.”Sophiedroppedthebagsbesidethe
chairoppositemineandsat.
“That’sgood?”Ihadnofuckingidea,butIwantedtolearnasmuchasIcould.
“Yes,” her smile was short-lived but genuine. “Some children are taking their first
steps at that age, but Noah seems to be ahead of the game in some physical milestones.
He’stallandbigforhisage,too.”
Anotherphysicalcharacteristichegotfromme?
Thewordswereunsaid,butI’mguessingSophieknewtheywerehangingintheair.
“Noah’sgotmostofhisteeth,too.We’rejustwaitingonhissecondmolarstocome
through. He gets a little grumpy sometimes with teething, but on the whole, he’s been a
champ.”Sherubbedherhandsbackandforthoverherdenim-coveredthighs.“Hishearing
isfine.Wehadafreecheckatthelocalpharmacyamonthago.”
“Sophie,whatyou’resharingisinteresting,andI’mgoingtowanttohearallaboutit
later, but you telling me about a free hearing check for Noah isn’t what I meant about
gettingthefullstory.”
Shesighedandclosedhereyesforamoment.Whensheopenedthemagain,shemet
mygazesquarely.“Askyourquestions.”
“Whydidn’tyoutellmeyouwerepregnant?”
Shestraightenedinherchair.“Itriedto.”
“Howhard?”Ishotback.
“Numerous times.” Ignoring my disbelieving stare, she continued. “Rob knew the
name of your employer, Marshall Security in Denver. I rang them three times and left
messages for you to call me, that I needed to speak to you, and that it was important,
vitallyimportant.”
“Ididn’tgetthosemessages.”
“That doesn’t mean I didn’t call. You can check my phone records if you don’t
believeme.”
“Whenexactlydidyoucall?”
“Yourdad’sfuneralwasthetwenty-sixthofFebruary.IcalledtheendofAprilwhenI
had the results of the blood tests confirming I was pregnant.” She leaned forward and
pointedherfinger,stabbingtheair.“AndRobcalledaroundthesametimewhenIdidn’t
hearbackfromyou.”
April.Goingbackroughlytwoandahalfyearsnow.MarshallSecurityhadasmaller
staff then. There’d been a receptionist that was fired sometime in the May—or was it
June?—forbeingincompetent.Plus,she’dtriedtodatealloftheguysworkingforLance,
includingme.
Asickeningfeelingdevelopedinthepitofmystomach.
“Sophie,Iswear,Ididn’tgetthosemessages.IcantellyouLanceMarshallfiredthe
receptionistwhowasemployedatthattimeforincompetence.”
“I believe you, Deke.” She shrugged, her expression mirroring the sadness in her
voice. “I always had trouble associating the man I knew to the one who couldn’t be
bothered returning my calls. We know each other. Know the kind of people we are. So,
yes, I believe you. Just like I hope you believe me when I say I made those calls.” She
liftedherchininasmallmeasureofdefiance.
Ihadnoreasontodoubther.Notonlywassheofferingupherphonerecords,butlike
Sophiesaid,Ididknowhertobeapersonofcharacter.
Thinking back, I could remember instances where a couple of the girlfriends of
Lance’smenhadcomplainedofhassleswiththereceptionist.Itwasoneofthereasonsthe
menwerehappywhenLanceshowedherthedoor.
“Jesus,Soph,I’msorry.IwishI’dknownsooner.Icanonlyapologizeforthatfucked
up situation.” I sat there, shaking my head. One deluded bitch could wreak so much
damage.Iclenchedmyfistandimaginedsmashingitthroughawall,theshatteringpainin
myknucklesasbonehitahardsurfaceawelcomerelease.
The caveman existed in all men, and I was no different. Meting out and enduring
physicalpainwasacatharticexperienceinsomeways.
“Well,okay.”Sophierosefromherchairandheldherhandstogetherinfrontofher
likeshe’djustconcludedameetingwithheraccountant.
Oh,no,sweetheart.That’snothowwewereplayingthisout.
“Doyouhaveaspareroomsetup?”Irememberedthehousehadfourbedrooms.
“Ofcourse,why?”
“Good.I’dpreferabedtothesofa.”
Sophieblinked,asifIwastalkinginaforeignlanguage.“Idon’tunderstand.”
“Letmespellitoutforyou.There’sacrazynutjobstalkingyou,andI’mnotafanof
that happening. Also, I’ve just found out I have a son who I want to get to know and
protect.”Istoodandglancedatmywatch.“I’llneedacoupleofhourstosortsomejobs
outatthehouse,andthenI’llbringmystuffover.”
“No,”shesaidinawhisper,beforeshakingherheadvigorously.“No!”Thistimeshe
shoutedherdislike.
Noahlookedupfromhistoydeliberationsanddrewhisbrowstogetherinafrown.
“Mommy,yes!”
“See,Noahthinksit’sagoodidea.”Iignoredherclenchedmouthandlookedtoour
son.“Right,buddy?”
Noahsmashedafistthroughhisnewestskyscrapercreation.“Right,buddy.”
Itookthatasaringingendorsementofmyplan.
“Dekeyoucan’tstayhere.”
“Sophie,eitheryouletmestayhereorI’mgoingtoringLanceMarshallandhavemy
buddiescomeandputyouandNoahinprotectivecustody.”
IwouldhavelaughedatthewayhermouthdroppedatmyultimatumifIhadn’tbeen
serious.
“Youcan’tjustdothat.”
“Wannabet?”Isteppedcloser,forcinghertoretreatuntilthebackofherlegshitthe
seat of the chair behind her. “You’d be surprised what a private security firm with close
linkstomanygovernmentagenciescanachieve.Especiallywhensomeofthoseagencies
can’tbefoundinanygovernmentdirectory.”
Sophie dropped her gaze to the floor and sighed, which I took as a sign of her
compliancewithmyplan.Thefactwasherpermissionwasn’tessentialtomeprotecting
her. Whether she stayed by my side of her own free will or in handcuffs, I didn’t mind
eitherway.Infact,thereweretimeswhenIpreferredtohaveaprettyladyincuffs.
Butfornow,I’dleavethatdiscussionwithSophieforanothertime.
“Seeyouinalittlewhile,buddy.”
“Seeya.”Noahwavedbeforeturningbacktohistoys.
Iwalkedtowardthefrontdoor,butturnedbeforeIreachedthefoyer.“Oh,Sophie?”
“Yes?”shesnappedwithmorethanalittlehintofirritation.
“Don’ttrytorun,babe.I’llcatchyouandhaveyoutakentoasecurelocation.”Isaw
herquickintakeofbreath.Yep,shehadbeendebatingtheprosandcons.“Promiseme.”I
ordered,holdinghergaze.
Shedidn’tlookaway.“Ipromise.”
Andthathadtobeenoughformetowalkoutofhereanddowhatwasnecessaryto
ensureIcouldmovein.
Trustworkedbothways.
Sophie
“Sophie,stepawayfromthewindow.”
Deke’svoicecamefromthedirectionoftheloungechairbehindme.
“Nowindow,”Noahsaidwithwaymoreauthoritythanappropriateforatoddler.
Lifefather,likeson.
I closed my eyes and counted to ten. Slowly. Using point five numbers for added
measure.
AndstillIwantedtokickDekeinthebuttbythetimeIgottonine-point-five.
Icouldn’twalkpastadamnwindowwithoutDeketellingmenottolingerandmake
myselfatargetforthestalkerdudetoviewandgethischeapthrills.
Dekehadbeengivingmethesewarningsforthelastthreedays.
Three.Days.
Noah,whothoughtitwasfuntospeakinaserioustone,hadtakentothisnewgame
with great fervor, buoyed by his father who kept congratulating him for being such a
“goodlittleman”.
Meanwhile, I was ready to grab a spotted handkerchief, toss in my Chanel No. 5
perfume along with a roll of chocolate chip cookie dough and run away for the next
twenty-fourhours.
AllmycallsandmailwerebeingscreenedbyDeke.Let’snotevenbegintodiscuss
the utter humiliation I felt on behalf of our mailman, Phil, who today was forced to
“assume the position” meaning face the wall with his hands pressed to the wall above
shoulderheightandlegsspreadshoulderwidthapartasDekefriskedhimforanyweapons
orothersuchcontraband.AllthishappenedbecauseDekeandsomeguycalledRyderhe
spoketodailybyphonehaddecidedthestalkermustbesomeoneIknow,sincethecrazy
jerkhadmanagedtoleavetheratatahouselocatedonaquietstreetandgounnoticed.As
for the postal worker, the poor man had been delivering mail to my family for sixteen
years, but as far as Deke was concerned, he was potentially public enemy number one.
TheirinteractionconcludedwithDekewarningPhilofthedangersof‘fuckingwithwhat’s
mine’ followed by me handing the man a tin of my home-made blueberry muffins as a
tokenofmydeepandeverlastingapologies.
Notwithstanding the fact my muffins are awesome, I was betting we wouldn’t be
seeingPhilthemailmanagainanytimesoon.
IcouldgivealotofleewayforthewayDekefilledoutapairofjeansandasnugt-
shirt—a lot of leeway. The black ensemble he was wearing today ticked many boxes in
myappreciationofthemalephysique.
ButIthinkImaybeclosetoresemblingawomanontheedge.
“Soph,I’mnotkidding.”
Uhhuh.
“NeitheramI,Deke.”
Hecreasedhisbrow.“What?”
“I’m not kidding when I say you’re driving me freaking nuts.” Hands on hips and
voicerising,Ididn’tcarethatIwassettingabadexampleforNoah.Dekehadbeensetting
abadexampleforNoahthelastthreedays,too,andtheywerenowexchanginghigh-fives
onaregularbasis.
Deke’ssighwentnowheretowardimprovingmymood.
“Igetthishasbeenahugeadjustmentforyou.”
“No,Deke.”Imovedforwardtostandinfrontofhimashesatinmybeigelounge
chairandhadmanagedtosquishmygorgeousaquaandbrownpatternedthrowcushions
downintoonecornerofthechair.Ofcourse,thiswasnotthefirsttimehe’dabusedmy
throwcushions.Butsinceheconsideredthempeststhatsomehowmanagedtobreedand
create more cushions overnight, he didn’t really give a damn. I made a sideways slicing
motionwithmyhand.“I’mdone.”
“Withwhat?”
“OperationOverbearing.”
AsIfinishedspeaking,therewasaknockatthedoor.Ididn’tbothergoingtogreet
whoeverwasthereasthiswasDeke’sterritoryfortheforeseeablefuture.
UnlessIkilledhimfirst.
Rob, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt decorated with flecks of sawdust, had likely just
finishedwork.
“ThankGod!”Irushedtogivehimahug.
“Hey,kiddo.”Robsqueezedmebackbeforelettinggo.“How’severythinggoing?”
“Takemewithyou.”Ipleaded.
Rob stared at me blankly a second before flicking his gaze to Deke. “Is everything
okay?”
“No,”Istatedwithoutpreamble.
DekegaveRobaneasy-goingsmileandshookhishead.“It’sfine.Sophie’sadjusting
tohavingclosequartersprotection.Thanksforcomingover.”
“I’m going nuts.” I gripped my brother’s hand. “Either take me with you or take
Deke.”
Rob’sgazeflashedtoDekeandbacktome.Fromhisassessinggaze,clearlyhewas
weighinguptheoptionsofphysicallytakingonthegiant-sizedformerSEALagainstthe
benefitsofcontinuingtobreatheunassistedbymachinery.
“I’mnotgoinganywhereandneitherisSophie,”Dekestated,underthedelusionhe
spokeforbothofus.“ButthanksforagreeingtohaveNoahforthenight.”
Wasting no time ignoring me and thus not having to answer my earlier plea, Rob
lookedtoDeke.“Noproblem.”HesmiledoveratNoah.“Youreadyforyoursleepover,
kiddo?”
“Sleepover!”Noahwasalreadyonhisfeetandwalkingtothefrontdoor.
“What?” My gaze switched between the men, who clearly had hatched some plan
earlierthisafternoon.
“NoahandIpackedhisbag.”Dekereachedbehindoneofthesidetablesandlifted
up the cute blue and white sports bag decorated in little soccer balls that Mom and Dad
hadboughtforNoahlastwinter.“He’sreadytogo.”
“Bye.”Noahstartedwavingmadlytotheroomatlargelikehewasthestarattraction
atapoliticalfundraiser.
“Hangonaminute.Ihaven’tagreedtothis.”Iswungmygazebetweenthemenand
backtomyson.
“He’llbefine,sweetheart.”Robgavemeaquickhug.
NoahlovedhavingsleepoversathisUncleRob’shouse.Itwasmewhofrettedand
called,sometimeseverycoupleofhourstocheckonhimuntilRobthreatenedtotakethe
phoneoffthehook.
“Kisses.”Noahkissedhispalmandthrewhisarmoutinourdirection,repeatingthe
actanumberoftimes.ThenbeforeIevenhadachancetobundlehimupinmyarmsand
kisshimproperly,hewalkedoutthedoor.
“Gotta go.” Rob did a craptastic job of smothering his laughter as he picked up
Noah’sbagandclosedthedoorbehindhim.
IspunaroundtofaceDeke.“Howdareyou!That’smybabyyouhandedover.”
EvenwithhisbeardIcouldtellDeke’slipstwitcheddespitewhatIguessedwerehis
besteffortstomaintainastraightface.“Noah’sspendingthenightwithhisbelovedUncle
Robandfamily,notsigninguptojointheFrenchForeignLegion.”
“That’snotthepoint.”
Dekesighed.“Rob’salreadywarnedmehowthiswillgo.He’sagreedtotwophone
calls,twohoursapart.AnymorethanthatandNoahgetsunsettled.”
Dammit,theyhadapoint.
“Okay,” I agreed rather ungraciously. But I was curious. “Did Noah ask for a
sleepover?”
“Imayhaveplantedtheseed.Hewasallforourplans.”
Worry lodged heavy in my chest. “Are you getting bored with his company?” I
rushed to explain at the way his expression tightened. “Because I get having a child
around24/7isahugeadjustmentforanyonenotusedtokids.”
“I’mgoingtosaythisonce,only,Sophie.”Dekegrippedmychinbetweenhisthumb
and forefinger. “Having the chance to get to know my son has been amazing. I used to
think of my life in terms of before I joined the SEALs and after I became part of the
teams.NowIthinkintermsofbeforeandafterNoahcameintomylife.”
I stared at Deke for several moments, blinking against the burning sensation at the
backofmyeyes.Dammit,whendiditbecomesohardtoswallow?
“That’swonderful,Deke.”Iclearedmythroatagainstthesuddenonsetofgruffness.
“Youdon’thavetoworryaboutmyplansforNoah,Sophie.”
“You’replans?”
Dekestrokedhisthumbovermychin.“He’llalwaysbeahugepartofmylife.”
“I’mgladforthat.”Ifnotalsoatadridiculouslyjealous.
“Youonlyhaveonethingtoworryabout.”
Warinesscoveredmelikeacloak,tighteningaroundme.“What’sthat?”
Heleanedcloseandspokeinadeeplymasculinevoice.“Myplansforyou.”
Ihadamomentformypulsetoskip,beforeIfoundmyselfthrownoverhisshoulder.
“Deke,”Icried,grippingthebackofhist-shirtasheturnedandheadedupthestairs.
“Whatthehellareyoudoing?”
“Givingyoualessoninclose-quartersprotection,baby.”Heswattedmybottom.My
shriekofoutrageblendedwithhisdeeplaughterasheatbloomedovermyleftbuttcheek.
“Payattention,Itakenoprisoners,exceptmaybeprettysubs.”
DekeheadedupthestairstwoatatimewhileIgrippedhisshirtandhungonfordear
life.
Call me crazy, but I had a feeling I was in store for way more than a personal pat-
down.
Andtheprospectofthatcomingtruewasabsolutelythrilling.
Deke
Withahandpushedfirmlyonthebacksideofthesweetfemininebundleslungover
myshoulder,IstrodeintotheguestbedroomI’dbeenallocatedwithitsqueensizedbed.
Notasluxuriousasaking,butIdidn’tplanforeitherofustoneedextraspace.We’dbe
touching each other in a variety of different ways and positions, the more intimate the
better.
Beforethatcouldhappen,Ihadalessonplantodeliver.
Earlier, I’d turned down the bed so that only the fitted bottom sheet remained. The
restwaslumpedonachairtotheside.
A quick check over the materials I’d laid out on the bed earlier confirmed I had
everythingneededformyhands-onmethodoftutoring.
“Sophie,I’mexcitedaboutourplansfortonight.”
“Biteme.”
“That’sonthelist,baby.Butlet’snotjumpthegun.”
Ichuckledatherkittenishgrowl.Thesightofapissedoffwomanbeingtamedtothe
pointherfierytemperconvertedintosensualpassionwasunbelievablyhot.
Coming to stand at the end of the bed, I slid Sophie from my shoulder onto the
bedsheetandfollowedtokneelbesideheronthebed.I’dnotedherhairwasinaponytail
tiedatthebaseofherneck,makingmyplansforhereasiertocarryout.
IttookanearlyaminutebutIsoonhadherstrippedofherclothingandhergorgeous
nakedbodyonshow.Thebenefitsofbeinganexpertinhand-to-handcombattraining—
lethalorotherwise—wasalwaysabonus.
Flippingherovertoliefacedown,Ipulledherarmsbehindherback.
“Ourlessontonightishowacommandosuchasmyselfdealswithareluctantclient,
specificallyafemaleone.”Ireachedforthecuffsatmyside.“You.”
“Beforewestart,Iwantyoutorememberifthere’sanythingIdothatfrightensyou,
if you feel pressured beyond what you think is safe, click your fingers and I’ll stop and
checkwithyou.ButIwarnyou,ifyouusethatployasawaytosimplyantagonizeme,I’ll
spankyourassgoodandhard.”
“The first element to gaining complete cooperation is containment.” With quick,
precise movements, some picked up in the military, others from indulging in my
preferenceforbeingaDominantandusingbondage,IsecuredSophie’swristsinthecuffs,
checkingtomakesuretheskinwasn’tpinched.
“I’dliketocontainyourgiantego,”shemuttered.
“There’sanotherbehaviorneedingcorrection.”Igrabbedtheblackleatherpanelgag
withthesmalltwo-inchrubberballattached.Beforeshecouldguesswhatwascoming,I
slippedthegagoverhermouthandpushedtheredrubberballbetweenherlips,tightening
thestrapandbucklingitbehindherhead.
“Sohohahbich.”Sheshookherheadinfury,butherwordsweremuffledenoughthat
soonI’dhaveherconcentratingonwhatwasbeingdonetoherbodyinsteadoftheinsults
shecouldthrowatme.
Idodgedaflyingkickthatwouldhavedislocatedmyjaw.
Fuck,Ilovedherfeistiness.
Grabbingthespreaderbar,Ileanedmyweightgentlyonherleg,enoughtopinitin
place,lockedoneoftheleathercuffsaroundherotherankle,andrepeatedtheprocesswith
theotherleg.“Theleathercuffsaroundyourankleswillensureyoudon’tgetmarks.The
two-footlongsteelbarattachedtothecuffsgivesmeenoughroomtohavefunwithyou.”
Isweptmyhanduptheinsideofherinnerthigh,lovingthewayshewentstillasImoved
myhandhigher.“Withoutallowingyoutomakeaseriousrunforfreedom.”
“Mmmmffph.”
“Nowthatyou’recontained…”—Iturnedheroversoshefacedme—“wemoveonto
thenextphase.”Runningmyhandsoverherbody,Iskimmedthetopofherarms,downto
her sides and hips, trailing my fingers over the tops of her thighs, noting the way she
startedbeforesheforcedherlegsflatonthebed,andlockedhermusclesinplace.
Hereyesshonewithabrightnessfedbyamixtureofstubbornnessanddetermination.
Icouldn’twaittotameher.
“Domination,”Isaidinalow,commandingtone.
Her chest rose and fell with shaky breaths. I skimmed my hand over the top of her
pussy,justabovethehoodofherclitandpresseddown,lettingherfeelthefirmnessofmy
touchbutnotwhereitwouldgiveherthegreatestpleasure.
“Last time I tasted you, you flew for me, Soph.” I watched her eyes close as I
guessed her mind went back to that moment and then to here, where she had far less
freedomandpower.“Thistime,Iwon’tletyoucomesoearly.”Glidingmyhandoverher
pussy,Ifeltapatchofwetnessandcoatedmyfingertipswithherjuices.Movingmyhand
back up to her breasts, I wet each nipple and used her slickness to ease the tugging
sensationbutnotthepressureasIpinchedandrolledthepebbledbuds.
Herbreathingbecamelouderbehindthegagassheliftedherhipsoffthemattressin
aplea—asubconsciousone,maybe?—togainmytouch.
“Notyet,sweetheart.”Ipushedmyhandunderherbottomandpinchedthesoftskin.
Hersquealofdispleasurewasmirroredinherheatedglare.
Somuchpassion.
Gently pushing her to lie on her side, I rubbed the tender flesh, stroking, spreading
theheat,beforelandingahandswatonbothcheeks.
“Mmmmphhh.”Shelookedbackoverhershoulderatmeandscowledhardenough
tostrippaintoffagaragedoor.
“Theresheis.”IchuckledasIlandedtwomoreswatstoeachcheek,beforepressing
myhandtoherflesh,feelingtheheatandrubbingitintoherskin.Withgreatspiritcomes
astrongcraving.Findingtherightelementtosatisfythatcravingisthekey.
“NowIseeifmyhunchprovestrue.”
Iloweredherontoherbackagain.
Grabbing the middle of the spreader bar, I pulled it high, lifting her legs in the air,
beforeloweringthebarbackdown,forcingherkneestobendandopeningherpussyfor
myeasytouch.
Herplumplipsandfoldswereshinywithherdesire.
“Sweet,Sophie,notonlyareyouarousedbydominationandasmallamountofpain,
yourbodycravesaslightlyharder,moredemandingtouch.”
Islidtwofingersupthroughherpussy,cleavingherlipsandspreadingherwetness.
Then I plunged my two fingers deep into her cunt, twisting and curling them as her
breathingandthenhermoansbecamelouder,quicker.WhenIsawhereyescloseandher
chestlockasifonthevergeofcoming,Iremovedmyfingers.Herpitifulcriesweremusic
to my ears. I was no sadist, but I wanted to find the edge of her breaking point, where
desperationtookoverfrombuildingdesire.“Andthat’swhereIcouldleaveyou,Soph…
ifIwanted.”
Sheshookherhead,hereyesfilledwithdisbelief.“That’sthethingwithdomination.
Whenyou’reinthemoment,vulnerable,youareatthecompletemercyoftheDominant.”
Ibentclose,mylipsgrazingherear,“TheSEALincharge.”
Plungingtwofingersbackinsidehercunt,Iusedshort,lightstrokes,enoughtokeep
hersuspendedontheedge.
“Timeforthenextstep.”Curlingmyfingersrightoverherg-spot,Isaid,“Reward.”
Hardernow,faster,Istrokedandtwistedmyfingers,feelinghermusclescontract.“That’s
it,baby,letgo;flyforme.”
Hermuffledscreamswereajoyoussound.
TheD-ringsconnectingheranklecuffstothespreaderbarclankedasmetalhitmetal
undertheforceofthespasmsrockingherbody.Iletgoofthespreaderbarandusedthat
hand to unclick her ankle cuffs from the bar, then dropped the bar to the carpeted floor.
Waitinguntilhershuddershaslessenedtotinyquiversfromaftershocks,Islowlypulled
myfingersoutfromhervagina,makingsureIdraggedmyfingertipsoverherg-spot.
Her hard shudder was another gift on top of the riches of rewards she’d already
bestowedonmewithherbodyandmind’sembracingofourlesson.
Carefully,Ilaidherbackonherside,releasedherwristsfromthecuffs,andrubbed
theslightrednessaway.
“Onpurpose,I’vemadeyouwaitbeforeremovingyourgag.”Watchingthewayher
faceturnedaprettyshadeofpinkprovedmyinstinctwasontarget.Shewasembarrassed
by her loss of power. “Sophie, at any time you could have signaled your distress by
clicking your fingers and I would have stopped. Without your trust, my command over
youwouldbeanemptymoment.Youandonlyyouhavetherighttomakemestopwhen
I’mteachingyou.WitheveryinchofdominationIbringoveryou,youalsofreeyourself
toexperiencethethrillofbeingsubmissive.Thedynamicisatwo-waystreet.”Islidmy
hands behind her head and unbuckled the strap, easing the gag from her mouth. “Never
forgetthat,baby.”
Igrabbedawashclothfromtheedgeofthebedandwipedhermouthandface.
“There,baby.”
“Thankyou.”
Suchprettymanners.
Ibentdownandkissedherfullonthemouth,pressinghardandforcingmytongue
insidetotasteher,teaseher,claimherasmineinallthewaysthatmatteredhereandnow.
Releasing her mouth, I stripped out of my clothes. My cock stood fully erect, and
sweetJesus,Idon’tthinkI’veeverbeensohardinmylife.
IreachedforacondomI’dplacedonthebed.
“I’monthepill.”Sophiegavemeasoftsmile.“Withourluck,Iwouldn’ttrustthe
damnthinganyway.I’mclean.Itakeityouaretoo?”
“Yes.”Lancerequiredafullmedicaleverythreemonths.
Herquietnodtoldmeherdecision.
Iplacedmyhandsunderherkneesandliftedthemupandwideandkneeledonthe
bedbetweenthem.“Wehavealotoftimetomakeupfor,Soph,butunlikelasttime,more
thanonenighttodiscovernewthingsabouteachother.”
I left the idea hanging there for her to take up if she wished. Whatever we had
between us right now was new and yet we’d been soulmates for most of our lives. Talk
aboutafuckeduphistory.
Sophiesaid,“Ifyou’reopentothethought,wehavealifetime.”
Mypulsejackknifed.
TherewasnothingmoreprecioustomethanmySophandmyson.
I claimed her mouth the same moment I joined my body with hers, seating myself
nearfullinsideher.Thefeelofhertightnessaroundmewaslikealong,wetkiss,onethat
gripped me as the muscles in her sweet cunt held onto me with every outward thrust,
wringingsensationandpushingmetothelimitsofmycontrol.
Icouldn’tcomethisearly.ButitseemedSophiehadotherideas.Wrappingherlegs
around me, she lifted her lips, allowing me to sink in her warmth. “You’ve always been
myhero,Deke.Noshinymedalscanmakethatanymoreofafactforme.”
Ihadnowords.
Jesus.Thiswoman.
Witheverydrivingthrust,Iheldhergaze,herbody…theloveinherheart.
Ourbreathingturnedfaster,grewlouder.
Ifeltherhandsonmyback,thenhigher,atmyshoulders.
Tentrailsoffirescratchedfrommyshouldersdownmybacktomyass.Once.Twice.
Ilostcount.
Thebitingsensationdetonatedariotofneedthatswirledfrommyballs,risingtomy
cock,andthreateningtospillatanymoment.
Sophie’smouthcurvedintoawickedsmile.Therewasnohintofgloating,butlet’s
faceit,I’mthekindofguythatwon’tlethimselflosewithoutafight.
“Nowyou’vedoneit.I’mgonnamakeyouscream.”
I pounded into her, both of us gripping each other, kissing, snarling, cursing as our
dualneedtocomefoughtwithourdesiretomaketheotherfallfirst.
Notthistime,Soph.
Iforcedmyhandbetweenourbodiesandrubbedmythumboverherclit.
Soverywet.
Makingthemostofherslickness,Ithrummbedherclitwithquickshortflicksatan
alternatetempotomythrusts.
Guaranteedcontinualsensation.
IneversaidIwasn’tabastard.
I waited, gritting my teeth, hanging onto the tissue paper thin remainder of my
controlasmyballsdrewtight.Ihadsecondsleft.
“I—” She gasped. “You—” Throwing her head back into the pillow, she let loose
withathroatyscream.“Youbastard.”
Herbodyshookinmyarms.Fingernailsscrapedmyback.Morecriesfilledtheair.
“That’smygirl,”IbitoutthroughclenchedteethsecondsbeforeIliftedmyheadand
roaredoutmyownrelease.Pulsatingwavesofpleasureshotthroughmycockasherpussy
squeezedmylength,continuingthebrillianttortureuntilmyattentionnarrowedtonothing
but blinding pleasure. I convulsed against her, letting her have my weight for a moment
beforeIrolledtomyside,takingherwithmeinmyarms.
Minutespassedasourshakybreathingcameundercontrol.Thesweatonourbodies
cooled, leaving a chill. I reluctantly let her go long enough to reach over and grab the
blanketfromthechairwhereI’dpiledthebeddingI’ddiscardedearlier.
Coveringusboth,Ienfoldedherbackinmyarmsandkissedthetopofherhead.
ThewomanI’dfallenforwhenIwasten.
“A lifetime of discovery together.” I rested my cheek on her damp hair. “After
twenty-oneyearsofputzingaround,Ithinkweshouldmakeourpairingofficial.”
Sophiepulledbackinmyarmsandstudiedmyface.“You’reserious?”
“Babe,youtriedtogetyourbrothertorescueyouthisafternoon.I’mnottakingany
chancesyou’llloseyournerveandtrythatasecondtime.”
“Notachance.”Hereyesshinedwithunshedtears.
“Why’sthat?”Iasked,myvoicedeepeningasItightenedmyarmsaroundher.
“BecauseI’velovedyousinceIwaseight.You’restuckwithme.”
She rose up on an elbow and pressed her lips to mine. I lay back, putting a hand
behindherheadandpullingherdownontopofmychest.Iletherkissme,tasting,biting,
maybestillgettingusedtomybeard.Onlywhenmycellrangdidwebreakaway.
Igotupandgrabbedmyjeansfromthefloornearthefootofthebed.
GlancingatthecallerID,Iacceptedthecall.
“Shana,what’sup?”
“Thisisn’tShana,butherassistant,Becca,”ayoungfemalevoicechirped.
“Well,Becca,whatcanIdoforyou?”Atclosetofiveo’clockonaFridayafternoon.
“Good news! We’ve had a potential buyer for your property contact us today. He’s
seensomeofthephotosShanatookyesterdayonourFacebookpage.Preparedtooffertop
ofthepricerangeShanaquotedyou.He’ssuperkeenbuthasabunchofquestionsabout
therepairsandsuch.Shana’sstuckinCincinnatitoday,butshewonderedifyou’dmind
coming to our offices to answer his questions.” Her voice dropped to a conspiratorial
whisper.“He’sherenow.”
I closed my eyes for a second. Leaving Sophie unprotected wasn’t an option, but
havingapotentialbuyerforthehousethatwaspreparedtoofferthemoneyShanaandI
hadputasawishlistpricewasworthcheckingout.“Noworries,Becca.Givemetwenty
minutes.”
“Willdo.”Beccaendedthecall.
“That was the office of my real estate agent.” I tossed my phone on the bed and
headed to the doorway “They have a prospective buyer, willing to pay top dollar,
interestedinthehouse.He’sgotquestionsabouttherepairsandShana’soutoftowntoday.
Theyneedmetotalkwithhim.I’vegottotaketheworld’squickestshowerandthenhead
out.”
“Getamoveonthen.”Shesmiled,grabbingapillowandlookingsettotakeanap.
“Whenyou’redonethere,canyoubringbacksomepizzaandwe’llcampoutinfrontof
theTV?”
“Thatsoundslikefun,exceptthepartwhereyou’renakedandinbedwhileI’mout.”
IpressedRyder’snumberasIheadedintothebathroom.
“Deke,what’sup?”
“I need you on check for Sophie. I’ve got to go see a prospective buyer at the real
estateagency.Answersomequestionsabouttherepairs.”Iturnedontheshower.
“I’mabouttwentyminutesaway.”
“Noproblem.”Idecidedtohavefunatmybuddy’sexpense.“I’lltellSophieyou’ll
giveherthepasswordHollywoodsosheknowsshecantrustyoubeforelettingyouinthe
house.”
“AndI’llthrowyouonyourasswhenyougetback,andshe’llknowI’mthebetter
man.”Rydersighed
I chuckled. “I’ll make it up to you and bring pizza with me. You can get to know
Sophieandwe’llhangforafewhours.”
“We’vegotaplan.Seeyouthen.”Ryderendedthecall.
Imadequickworkofmyshowerandfourminuteslaterwasbackinmybedroom.Or
shouldIsaythebedroomI’dbeenstayinginuntiltonight?
Sophiewasstillluxuriatinginlazypostsexsnoozing.
Afterscrubbingmywethairwiththetowel,Igrabbedjeans,boxersandagrayt-shirt
fromthemiddledrawerofthedresser.“Babe,youneedtogetdressed.I’mnotleavingyou
here alone, and I’ve already called Ryder at his motel. He’ll be here in less than twenty
minutes.Goodthingis,I’mbringinghomepizzaforthethreeofus.”
“Ryder?”
“SEALbuddy.OneoftheguysIworkwithatMarshallSecurity.”
“Oh.My.God.”Shejumpedupfromthebedandclutchedtheblankettoherchest.“I
can’tmeetoneofthoseguysyet.Ihaveto”—sheglancedaroundfrantically—“haveprep
time.”
Itriednottoseemobtuse,butdecidedIcouldn’tfakeit.“Preptime?”
“Thesearetheguysyouareclosestto,”sheexplained,hertoneearnest.“Ineedtoget
my hair done. Have a mani/pedi. You know, prep time?” If her volume control was any
indicationofhernervousness,wewereindangerouswaters.
“Soph, you’re a catch. You don’t need prep time.” At her continued imitation of a
statue,Idecidedshocktacticsweremybestoption.“Babe,he’sgoingtobehereinless
thantwentyminutes,whetheryouindulgeinpreptimeornot.Moveit.”
Cursing and giving me a glare like I’d purposely orchestrated this scenario, she
stompedfromtheroomandlikelyintoherbedroom.
Preptime.
I’dhavetorememberthatforfuturereference.
Grabbing my wallet, phone and keys, I stopped by her bedroom and found her
twisting her hair up in some kind of messy bun. “By the way, Ryder will give you the
password ‘Hollywood’ so you know it’s him. Don’t answer the door until he tells you.”
this was one of those times I wished I’d thought ahead and rigged up a camera for
whenever Ryder knocked on Sophie’s front door. The guys back in Denver would be
pissedIdidn’tcatchthisonfilm.
“Hollywood?”Thecurlofherlipconveyedshethoughtthenamesucked.
Anditdid,makingthefactitwasRyder’snicknameallthemorespecial.
“Rememberonething.Ryder’saflirtandajoker,buthe’soneofthebestthereisat
hisjob.”
Shepausedsoakingawashclothunderthefaucet.“Gotit.Nowgo.”
Leaningaroundher,Idroppedakissonhercheekandheadedonmyway.
Sophie
I’djustfinishedswipingonsomelipglosswhentherewasafuriousknockingonthe
door. I glanced at my watch. Ryder made it in fifteen minutes. Grabbing my phone, I
headeddownstairs.Iwasatthetopofthestairswhenanotherroundofimpatientknocking
hitthefrontdoor.
Wow,thisRyderguyreallywantedmetoknowhe’darrived.Okaythen.Twocould
playthatgame.
“Givemethepasswordoryourlife.”IshoutedinmybestfakeRussianaccent.
“Sophie?”
Ireachedthefrontdoorandstared.“Andy?”
“Yes,openup.”
IdidsoandAndybargedin.Hestoodinfrontofme,concerninhisgazeasitswept
overoverme.Hegrippedmebytheshoulders,asifbracingme.
“Honey,I’msosorry,there’sbeenanaccident.Deke’sbeenhurt.”
“What?”IwhisperedandwenttostepbackbutAndy’sholdkeptmeinplace.
“We need to get to the hospital right away.” He looked around at the table in the
foyer.“Where’syourpurse?”
Iranintothelivingroomandgrabbedmyhandbagwithmywalletinside.“It’shere.”
“Andyourphone?”
Itappedmybackpocketofmyjeans.“Tellmewhathappened.”
“Hewasspeeding.Ranaredlight.”Andymovedfurtherintothehouse.“Isanyone
elsehere?”
Speeding? Deke? “No, that couldn’t be. Deke’s not the kind of guy to run a red
light.”
Noneofthismadesense.Andwhendidthisaccidenthappen?Imean,Dekehadonly
beengonenomorethanfifteenminuteswhenAndywasbangingonthedoor.
Didithappenjustaroundthecorner?Wouldn’tIhaveheardacrashwiththatkindof
impact?
“Ineedyourphone.”Andyheldouthishand,palmup.
“Why?”
“BecauseweneedtoseeifDekewascallingyou.Aneyewitnesssaidshesawhimon
thephonewhenherantheredlight.”
“The eyewitness is lying.” I stood my ground, ignoring Andy outstretched hand. “I
knowforthefactDekeisanalaboutBluetoothandhandsfreeandallthatwhendriving.”
“Sophie,youneedtodoasIsay.”Andy’stoneheldanoteofwarning,andnotthebig
brotherlykind.OneIwasn’tfamiliarwith,atleastnot…“YouneedtodoasIsay.I’mthe
oneyoushouldlistento.Nothim.Youbelongtome.”
Andy.Mybrother’sbestfriend.
Thiswasthecreepstalkingme?
Itriedtokeepmyexpressionblank.Nomatterwhat,IknewIcouldn’thandovermy
phone.TheminuteIdidthat,Ihadnowaytogetwordout.“Okay,wellmaybeyoucan
see on my tablet. I get better reception on there.” I went to move around Andy, but he
steppedinfrontofme.
“No, Sophie.” His gaze, previously concerned, was now narrowed, accusing. “Give
me your phone.” That flat voice. Different without the electronic camouflage but still
soundingcompletelyblankofemotion.
Anicycoldnesscreptintomyveins.
Andywasmystalker.
“Gotohell.”Iturned,aimingfortheopenfrontdoor,butIgotonestepawaybefore
hegrabbedmytopandyankedmebackwards.
Twisting my hair in a brutal grip, he dragged me into the living room. “You
disappointme,Sophie.I’vebeenkeepingyouatadistanceforsomanyyears,waitingfor
youtogrowupbeforeIcouldtakeyouasmine.”
“There’snowayIcouldbewithyou.”Itriedtostandupstraight,butAndy’sgripon
my hair forced me to stand with my neck bent toward him. “It’s always been Deke for
me.”
“ForgetDeke.”Andyshouted,spittlecomingoutofhismouthasheswunghisfree
armwide.“Dekeisn’tworthyofyou,ofthishouse.”Hesobbed.“Sophie,whenyouslept
with him, that defiled you. Do you know how you broke my heart that night, knowing
you’dlainwiththatwhitetrash?”
Oh,noyoudon’t!
Andywaslookingtotheceiling,ventinghisspleenanddistracted.
Itookmyonechance.
Withmyheadbentatthatawkwardangle,Irockedonmyfeet,swayingawayfrom
Andybeforelungingbackinhisdirection.Wetoppledover,mefallingoverhim,kicking,
scratchingandbitingasItriedtogettohissidearm.
“Freeze your ass, you sorry sack of shit, before I put a bullet in it for my buddy
Deke,”acold,hardvoicethunderedaboveus.
Myhairwasfallingallaroundme,obscuringmyvision.Ithrewmyheadbackand
stared,mouthopen,atthesightofahugeblondhairedmanstandingnotfourfeetaway
frommewithhisweapontrainedonAndy.Wearingjeans,motorcyclebootsandanavy
Henleyshirtthatfithisbodylikeaglove,hehadthecrystalclearblueeyesofatopmovie
star.
Heflickedhisgazemywayandsmiled.Icaughtmybreath.Iknowitwaswrongbut
underthatkindofcombinedpackageagirlcouldonlybecoolforsolong.
“Hollywood,”Iwhisperedtomyself,finallygettingthesignificance.
Thesmile stayed inplace as heheld out a handand helped meup. “Ryder, at your
service,ma’am.”
“Sophie!”
IspuntowardthesoundofDeke’svoice.
Hechargedthroughthedoorwayandgatheredmeinhisarms,myfeetnowagood
footofftheground,Iwassure.
Looking into his face and seeing the fear there, the tears fell of their own volition.
“I’mokay.Really.”Isniffed,totallymakingalieofmywords.“I’mjustemotional.”
Dekecrushedmetohim,pushingmyfaceintohisneck.“I’mgonnakillhim.”
No, we weren’t going down that path. I reared back and held his face between my
hands.“You’regoingtodoonebetterandhavethebestlifeyoucan,livingiteveryday,
knowingyouhavemeandourson,andweloveeachother.Hehasnobody.”Iknewthat
soundedmean,butthebastardwasacreepyassstalker.“Andhe’llknowthatfortherest
ofhissorrylife.”
“Thebastardorganizedforsomeonetoimpersonateabuyerandluremetotheoffice
andawayfromthehouse.Shanamanagedtocomebackearlyandstartedaskingtheman
questions,gotsuspicious.Theguythoughtitwasajoke.Andypaidhimfiftydollars.By
thetimeShanarangme,Iwashalfwaythere.”
“Come on asshole.” Ryder jerked a handcuffed Andy to his feet, pushing the man
aheadofhimbeforeAndycouldthinktotrytospeaktothem.
Dekeswepthisgazeoverme,lingeringonmyeyesandsofteningashesawthetears
stillfallingdownmycheeks.
“WhatdidIdotodeserveyou,Soph?”
“You’remyhero,Deke.Whenagirlfindstheguyforher,shestickswithhim.”
“Evenwhenshe’sonlyalittlegirlofeight?”
“Didn’t you know, little girls always have the best luck in finding their Prince
Charming.”
Deke
I watched as the movers locked the door of their truck and climbed in to start the
engine.Sophie’sfurniturewaspackedupandreadytobemovedtoDenver.Mywoman
surprisedmeinherdecisiontosellthehousehereandnotrentinDenverforayearfirst.
She stated she was committed to making Denver her home, but more importantly, this
househadbeenfullofloveandhappymemories.Anotherfamilydeservedthechanceto
makenewonesoftheirownhere,usingthetreehousecubby,andfillingthehousewith
flowersfromthegarden.
Glancingacrossthestreet,Isawwhathadbeenashutteredhouse,bereftofjoy,now
with a new painted exterior and home to a young family. A mom and two kids were
putting out Halloween decorations as the dad finished carving the last of their jack-o’-
lanterns.
Thesoundsoftheirlaugherdriftedovertome,cleansingdecadesofstainsaway.
I could leave here content, knowing the sins of the father did not carry over to the
son.
“Dad, voom voom.” Noah walked up to me, holding a tablet to help keep him
occupiedonthelongdrivebacktoDenver.
“Hey, little buddy, you ready to head on out?” Lifting him up in my arms, I was
remindedyetagainoftherichesinmylife.
“Let’smove!”hecheered
“Soundslikeagrandideatome.”Sophiewalkedthroughthefrontgateandclosedit
behindherforthelasttime.Hereyeswereshinyandjustalittlered.
Iheldmyarmout,andshetuckedherselftomyside.
Noahleanedovermychesttohismomandpattedhercheekbeforelayingakisson
hermouth.
“Weready?”Ilookeddownatmywife.
“Forthisadventureandsomanyothers,aslongasIhaveyouatmyside,I’mready
foranything.”
“Samehere,Soph.”
I steered my family to our SUV, a new purchase with Noah in mind. After fixing
Noahinhisinfantcarseat,IclimbedinthefrontwithSophie.
It wasn’t until we were on the highway that I picked up a repetitive sound coming
fromthebackpassengerarea.
“Hey,buddy,watchareyouwatching?”Ilookedinthereviewmirroratourson.
Noahhitabuttonandturnedhistabletforustosee.
UpcamealoopedvideoofRyder,grinningandalittleglintingstarburstappearingon
hiseyeashewinked.“Yournewpasswordshouldyouchoosetoacceptitis:I’mRyder,
andI’mgoodlooking.”
“You’vegottobekiddingme?”
Sophieshrugged.“HegaveittoNoahandmadehimpromisetoplayitonthedrive
home.”
Ifacedthewomanwhosupposedlyhadmyback.“Andyouallowedthis?”
Shegrimaced.“Hedidsavemylife.”
Ishookmyheadandconcentratedontheroadahead.
“Ryderrules!”Noahgaveathumbsupsignandgiggled.
Imadeapromisetokickthatsonofabitch’sassthemomentIwasbackatwork.
AndasImademypromise,theaudioofthatdamnvideoplayedinthebackground.
Thiswasgoingtobeareallylongdrive.
“What’sthatsaying?Revengeisadishbestservedcold?”Sophie’seyesshonewith
laughter.
Ismiled.Trustmywifetoshowmethesilverlining.
Ryderhadawholebuffetcominghisway.
~*~*~*~
I hope you loved Deke and Sophie’s emotion-charged story. The men of SEAL
Mercenariesaren’tfinishedyet!KeepaneyeoutforRyder’sbook,The SEAL’s Hostage
out8thDecember!
Comejoinmy
onFacebook.Isharenews,sneakpeaksof
futurebooks,andcontestsjustforthosefans.Ican’twaittoseeyouthere!
Makesureyousignupformy
whereIshareexclusivegiveaways,
newreleasealerts,andfreereads.
I’mthankfulforyougettingthewordoutaboutmybooks,especiallyrecommending
themtoafriend.Reviewsareagreatwayforreaderstodiscovertheirnextfavoritebook.
PleaseleaveoneatAmazon.
I’manauthorofbadboyromance.Givemeanunshavenalphawhose“rougharound
theedges”mannerhidesatenderside(hiddenwaydeepdown)andI’mhooked.Havehim
prepared to fight to protect what’s his and I’m SOLD! I hope you enjoyed The SEAL’s
SecretBabyandIcan’twaittosharemoreofthetattooedhotnesswithyou!
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Document Outline
- PART ONE
- CHAPTER ONE
- CHAPTER TWO
- CHAPTER THREE
- PART TWO
- CHAPTER FOUR
- CHAPTER FIVE
- CHAPTER SIX
- CHAPTER SEVEN
- CHAPTER EIGHT
- CHAPTER NINE
- CHAPTER TEN
- CHAPTER ELEVEN
- CHAPTER TWELVE
- EPILOGUE
- The SEALs Secret Baby
- Mailing List
- About Lilly Holden
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