SECRETS,LIES…ANDMONEY
SocialiteEmmaDearborn'sfuturewasallplannedoutforher:theperfectwedding,theperfect
husband,theperfectlife.ThenGarrettKeatingreturned.
Hewasn'tabouttoletEmmagothroughwithherfarceofamarriage,andhesetouttostopher…
seductionbeingatthetopofhislist.ButifEmmadidn'twalkdowntheaislebyherbirthday,shestood
toloseaninheritanceworthmillions.
JusthowfarwouldGarrettbewillingtogotohaveEmma?Allthewaytothealtar?
Fromthe“PeopleAreTalking”
Columnofthe
Eastwick,Connecticut,Gazette
Alloflocalsocietyisabuzzwithrumorsthattheweddingoftheyear—betweentheheiressofa
certainveryoldEastwickfamilyandheralmostequallywell-connectedfiancé—mightnothappen.
Ofcourse,thisweddinghasbeenpostponedsomanytimesthatsomepeoplewonderedwhetherthe
bridewasreallyreadytogetmarried.Butwethoughtshemeantitthistime.Theweddinginvitations
havebeenchosen,andallthearrangements—rightdowntothenamecardsandtheplacesettings—
havebeenmade.
Andyetwehearthebride-to-beishavingsecondthoughts.Hmm…Couldthathaveanythingtodo
withthesuddenreappearanceinourlittletownofanotherman—averyhandsome,verytroublesome
mantheladyisrumoredtohavebeen,um…“involved”withyearsago…?
JENNIFERGREENE
TheSoon-To-Be-DisinheritedWife
PublishedbySilhouetteBooks
America’sPublisherofContemporaryRomance
Acknowledgment
SpecialthanksandacknowledgmentisgiventoJenniferGreeneforhercontributiontotheSecret
LivesofSocietyWivesminiseries.
One
EmmaDearbornfeltanitch.Notalittleitch.Amaddening,unrelentingitch—rightbetweenher
shoulderblades,whereshecouldn’treachit.
Emmawasn’tpronetoitchesandwasalmostneverguiltyoffidgeting,whichwasprobablywhy
sherememberedexperiencingthesameterrorizingitchsensationbefore.Ithadonlyhappenedtwice
inherlife.Thefirsttime,she’daccidentallydrivenherdad’srestoredpricelessMorganintoLong
IslandSoundatGreenwichPointwhenshewassixteen.Thecarhadbeenrecovered;herdadnearly
hadn’t.Theothertime,herdatefortheannualChristmascotillionhadturnedugly,andshe’dhadto
walkhomeinherlongwhitesatindressandheelsinasnowstorm,cryingthewholetime.
Sincethosedays,ofcourse,shewasnolongeranovicewithdrivingormen.Moretothepoint,the
itchthistimecouldn’tpossiblyrelatetosomeimpendingtraumaticevent.Herlifewasgoing
splendiferously.
Impatientlyshetookalonggulpofmint-raspberrytea.Mentallyshetoldherselftogetoverthe
damneditchandquitsquirming.ForPete’ssake,therewasnothingremotelywrong.Everything
aroundherreflectedherserenelycontentedlife.
“Emma?”
Abasking-warmJunesunsoakedthroughtheglasswindowsoverlookingthepooloutside.The
EmeraldRoomwastheoneplaceintheEastwickCountryClubwherememberscoulddresscasually.
Todaythepoolwaschock-fullofkidsfreshoutofschoolandshriekingwithjoyfulenergy.Inside,
momsinsandalsandshortselbowedwiththebusiness-lunchcrowdinsuits.
Emma,becauseshe’djustchairedameetingofthefund-raisingcommittee,wasstuckdressedon
theformalside.Herlightsilksheathwaslavender-blue,notbecauseitwashersignaturecolor.Emma
objectedtothewholepretentiousconceptofsignaturecolors.Somehow,though,hercloset
mysteriouslyfilledupwithblues.Everyoneelseinthegroupwasdressedmorelaid-back—notthat
anyonecaredtodayaboutclothes.
TheDebshadmissedtheirtraditionallunchlastmonth—everyonewassodarnbusy!—whichmeant
theyallhadtotalkatoncetocatchup.
Harry,thebartender,hadkindlyreservedthemalachitetablebythedoors,notjustgivingthemthe
bestviewbutalsoalittleprivacyfortheirgossip.FelicityandVanessaandAbbywereallthere.
Emma’sheartwarmedtothelaughter—evenifthatitchwasstilldrivinghercrazy.Thefriends
werecloserthansisters.They’dallgrownuptogether,attendedthesameprivateschool,kneweach
other ’smostembarrassingmoments—andtendedtobringthemoutattheselunches.Iftheteasing
everlagged,therewasalwaystheirdebutantehistorytohauloutofstorage.Whatwerefriendsforif
nottosavorandembellishthemostmortifyingeventsinone’slife?AndCarolineKeating-Spence
hadjoinedthemforlunchthistime.
“Emma,areyousleeping?”
QuicklyshewhippedherheadtowardFelicity,notrealizingthatshe’ddroppedoutofthe
conversation.“Notsleeping,honest.Justkindofwoolgatheringwhatalonghistorywehave
together…howmuchfunwe’vealwayshad.”
“Yeah,sure.”Vanessawinkedtotherestofthem.“Shecoveredupnicely,butweallknowshe’s
engaged.Naturallyshewasn’tlisteningtous.She’satthatmoonystage.”
Felicitychuckled.“Eitherthatorthatbigclunkofasapphireonherfingerisblindingher.Hells
bells,itblindstherestofus,too.Whatanoriginalengagementring.Butthat’sexactlywhatIwas
tryingtoaskyouabout,Em.How’severythinggoingwiththeweddingplans?”
Againshefeltthatexasperatingitchspiderupherspine.Thiswasgettingdownrightcrazy.Her
engagementtoReedKellywasyetanotherthingthatwasgoingtotally—totally—rightinherlife.At
twenty-nineyearsold,she’dstoppedbelievingshe’deverbemarried.
Actuallythetruthwasthatshe’dneverwantedtobe.
“Everything’sgoingfine,”sheassuredthemall,“exceptthatReedseemstohavearrangedthe
wholehoneymoonbeforewe’vefinalizedtheweddingplans.”
Theyalllaughed.“Youtwohavesetadate,though,right?”
Anothershootingitch.“Actuallywe’vereservedEastwick’sballroomfortwodifferentSaturdays,
butbetweenmyscheduleatthegalleryandReed’sracingschedulewiththehorses,westillhaven’t
pinnedonedownforsure.Ipromise,thisgroupwillbethefirsttoknow.Infact,you’llprobably
knowbeforeIdo,knowinghowfastthisgrouppicksupsecrets.”
Theyallchortled—andagreed—andthenmovedontothenextvictim.Felicity,beingEastwick’s
foremostweddingplanner—whichmeantthatsheexcelledinbothoriginalextravaganzasandgossip
—wasalwaysfullofnews.
Asthefreshestscandalswerebroughtouttoair,EmmaglancedatCaroline,whoseemedoddly
quiet.Ofcourse,itwashardtogetawordinwiththeDebsalltalkingsimultaneously,butCaroline
hadn’tjoinedinthelaughter.AndnowEmmanoticedhersignalingHarryforherthirdglassofwine.
TheitchwasclosetodrivingEmmatodrink,too,butseeingCarolineguzzlingdownpinotnoir
distractedher.Heavenknew,theDebshadbeenknowntoenjoyadrink—andoccasionallyto
overindulge.Noonekissandtoldinthegroup,notoneachother.Emmawouldn’tnormallycareif
Carolinewasgulpingdownthepinotnoirs,butdrinkingwassounlikeher.
Carolinewasn’toneoftheoriginalcoreDebsgroupbecauseshewasalittleyounger.Emmahad
swoopedherintothecircleoffriends,thesamewayshetendedtopeelwallflowersoffthewallat
socialgatherings.Carolinewasnowallflower,buttherewasatimeshe’dneededalittleboostofself-
confidence.EmmahadgottentoknowherwellbecauseofGarrett—Caroline’solderbrother.
AgainEmmafeltaticklishitch.Thistimeafamiliarone.Althoughherhearthadn’tdugupthatold
emotionalhistoryinabluemoon,GarrettKeatinghadbeenherfirstlove.Justpicturinghimbrought
backthatwholepoignantera—thetimeinherlifewhenshe’dstillbelievedinlove,whenshe’dfelt
crazy-highjusttobeinthesameroomwithhimandequallypit-lowmiserableeverysecondthey’d
hadtobeapart.
Everybodyhadtolosethatsillyidealismsometime,sheknew.Still,she’dalwaysregrettedtheir
breakingupbeforemakinglove.Backthenshe’dheldontohervirginitylikeagamblerunwillingto
laydownheraces,yetsooftensincethenshethoughtshe’dmissedtherighttimewiththerightman.
Garrett’skisseshadawakenedhersexuality,herfirstfeelingsofpowerasawoman…herfirst
feelingsofvulnerabilityandsurrender,aswell.She’dneverforgottenhim,nevereventried.She
wasn’tcarryingatorchoranythingfoolishlikethat;itwasjustafirst-lovething.Heownedacorner
ofherheart,alwayswould….AbruptlyEmmastoppedwoolgathering.Harryshowedupattheirtable
again.
ThebartenderservedCarolineherthirdwine,whichsheimmediatelydownedlikewater.Emma
frowned.EveryoneknewCarolinehadhadariftwithherhusband,Griff,theyearbefore—butthey
werebacktogethernow.Everyonehadseenthemnuzzlingeachotheratthespringartfairasifthey
werenewlovers.Sowhatwastheheavydealwiththewine?
“Murder!”someonesaid.
Emma’sheadshotup.“Saywhat?”
Abbyspokeupfromthecorner,hervoiceathousandtimesmoretentativethannormal.“You’ve
hadyourheadintheclouds,Em.Idon’tblameyou,withaweddingcomingup.ButIwasjusttelling
thegroupwhathappenedsinceIwenttothepoliceaboutmymother.”
“Thepolice?”EmmaknewaboutAbby’smother ’sdeath.Everyonedid.LucindaBaldwin—alias
Bunny—hadcreatedtheEastwickSocialDiary,whichhaddishedallthedirtonthemoneyedcrowdin
Eastwick.Marriages,cheating,divorces,touchyhabits,legalorbusinessindiscretions—ifitwas
scandalworthy,Bunnysomehowalwaysknewandlovedtotell.Herdeathhadbeenashockto
everyone.“Iknowhowyoungyourmomwas,Abby.ButIthoughtsomeonesaidshehadaheart
conditionthathadn’tbeendetectedbefore,thatthatwaswhatshediedfrom—”
“That’swhatIthoughtoriginally,too,”Abbyaffirmed.“ButrightafterMomdied,Icouldn’tface
goingthroughherthings.Ittookmeawhile…butwhenIfinallygotaroundtoopeningmymom’s
privatesafe,Ijustexpectedtofindherjournalsandjewelry.Thejewelrywasthere,butallher
journalsweregone.Stolen.Theyhadtobe.Itwastheonlyplacesheeverkeptthem.That’swhenI
firststartedworrying.Andthen,findingoutthatsomeonetriedtoblackmailJackCartwrightbecause
ofinformationinthosemissingjournalsaddedtomysuspicions.”
“Abby’sbecomemoreandmoreconcernedthathermomwasmurdered,”Felicityclarified.
“MyGod.”Scandalwasonething,butEastwickbarelyneededanactivepoliceforce.Therehadn’t
beenaseriouscrimeinthecommunityinyears,muchlessanythingasgraveasmurder.
“Ican’tsleepatnight,”Abbyadmitted.“Ijustcan’tstopthinkingaboutit.Mymomlovedsecrets.
LovedputtingtogethertheDiary.Andfordarnsure,shelovedscandals.Butsheneverhadamean
boneinherbody.ShehadtonsofthingswrittendowninherjournalsthatsheneverusedintheDiary
becauseshedidn’twanttohurtpeople.”
Emmagropedtounderstand.“Sothat’spartlywhyyouthinkshewasmurdered?Becausesomeone
stolethosejournals?Eitherbecausetheywantedtousetheinformation,orbecausetheyhadasecret
themselvestheywantedcoveredup?”
“Exactly.ButIstillcan’tproveit,”Abbysaidrestlessly.“Imean,thejournalsaregone.That’sfor
sure.ButIcan’tprovethetheftisrelatedtoherdeath.ThepolicekeeptellingmethatIdon’thave
enoughtoopenupanewinquest.Honestly,they’vebeenreallynice—theyallagreethesituation
soundssuspicious.Butthere’snoonetoarrest,nosuspects.Ican’tevenprovethejournalswere
stolen.”
“Butshe’spositivetheywere,”Felicityfilledin.
Abbynodded.“Theyhadtobestolen.Thesafeistheonlyplacemymothereverkeptthem.
Unfortunately,thepolicecan’tactjustbecauseIknowsomethingistrue.There’snoevidencetoprove
mymotherdidn’tsimplyhidethejournalssomewhereelse.Andthereisn’tasinglesuspect.”
Thewholegroupclusteredclosetodiscussthedisturbingsituation—andtosupportAbby—but
eventuallytheEmeraldRoomfilledupwithkidsandfamilies.Serioustalkbecameimpossible.The
womenlightenedup,chitchattedaboutfamilynews,buteventuallythegroupbrokeup.
IntheparkinglotEmmaclimbedintoherwhiteSUV,hermindspinningbetweenCaroline’s
troublingbehavioratlunchandtheworrisomesuspicionsaboutBunny’sdeath.Still,bythetimeshe
turnedonMainStreet,hermoodinstinctivelylifted.
Herartgallery,Color,wasonlyacoupleblocksoffthemaindragintown.Emmadidn’tmind
runningthefund-raisingcommitteeforEastwick’scountrycluboranyoftheothersocial
responsibilitiesherparentspushedonher.Ifitweren’tforherparents—andamightyhugetrustfund
comingtoheronherthirtiethbirthday—shecouldn’tdothethingsshereallyloved.Mostpeople
neverknewaboutthevolunteerworkshedidwithkids,butthewholecommunitywaswellawarehow
muchtimeandloveshedevotedtothegallery.
Sheparkedinthenarrow,crookeddrive.ThebuildingwasatthecornerofMapleandOak,andin
Junenow,aprofuserowofpeoniesbloomedinsidethewhitepicketfence.TypicalofoldConnecticut
towns,Eastwickhadtonsofpre-Revolutionaryhistory.Herbuildinghadoncebeenahouse.Itwas
twohundred–plusyearsold,brick,withtall,skinnywindowsandadozensmallrooms—whichwas
theadvantage.Althoughsomethingalwaysseemedtoneedmaintenance,fromtheplumbingtothe
electricity,shehadadozenroomstodisplaycompletelydifferentkindsofartwork.Customerscould
roamaroundandexaminewhatevertheylikedinrelativeprivacy.
BythetimesheboltedoutoftheSUV—andnearlytrippedonthecobblestonesteps—shewas
humming.AshipmentofAlsonSkinnerClarkprintswasdueinlatethatafternoon.Theyneeded
sortingandhanging.Andtwoweeksbefore,she’dcomeacrossanoldWalterFarndonoiloncanvas
thatwasstillstashedinthebackroom—herworkshop—thatneededcleaningandrepair,whichshe
loveddoing.Andaroomonthesecondfloorwasvacantrightnow,justwaitingforhertosetupa
displayoflocalartists’work,anotherprojectshecouldn’twaittotakeon.
Hergalleryrodetheedgeofmakingaprofitandnot.Emmaknewperfectlywellshecouldhave
runitmoreefficiently,butshe’dalwaysknownshehadthetrustfundcoming.Itwasn’tthemoneythat
matteredtoherbutthefreedomtoopenuparttothecommunity,tobepartofmakingsomething
beautifulinpeople’slives.
She’dnevertoldanyonehowimportantthatgoalofbeautywastoher.TheDebswouldjustroll
theireyesathergoofyidealism.Herfamilywouldsighasifshe’dneverunderstandpracticalreality
—atleast,realityontheirterms.Andmaybeallofthemwereright,butwhenEmmaopenedtheornate
red-lacquerdoorintoColor,shefeltasweepingburstofplainoldhappiness.
“Hey,Ms.Dearborn!Iwashopingyou’dbebackbymidafternoon.YougotthatcratefromNew
Yorkyouwerewaitingfor.CameinFedExbeforenoon.”Josh,who’dworkedparttimeforherfor
years,blessedherwithashysmile.Hewassomewhereinthevicinityofsixty,skinnyasarailand
palerthanpaint.Somesaidhe’dbeenanartistonce.Somesaidhewasgay.Somesaidhe’dhadatoo-
longrelationshipwithbordeaux.AllEmmaknewwasthathe’dwalkedinandstartedhelpingher
whenshefirstopenedtheplace.He’dtaughthertons.
“Ican’twaittogetintoit.Youcanwatchforcustomersupfront?”
“Surething.”
Sheglancedatheroffice,stashedhersummerbagandspunaroundtozoominthebackroomwhen
thephonerang.Whenshegrabbedit,sheheardthefamiliarvoiceofherfiancé.
“Hey,sweetheart.Iwaswonderingifyouhadtimefordinnertonight.I’mtiedupmostofthe
afternoonbutprettysureIcouldmakeitintotownaround,say,seven.”
Instinctivelyshetwistedherarmbehindhertoclawatthatstrange,aggravatingitchagain.The
restless,stressyfeelingthathadbeenbuggingherforhourssuddenlyfiercelyintensified.“Sure,”she
said.“How’syourday?”
“Couldn’tbebetter.Boughtahoneyofastallion…”
Standingwiththephonetoherear,closetothewindow,sheignoredtheitchandsuddenly,slowly
liftedherhand.ThesapphireonherlefthandwasfromSriLanka.Reedhadtakenhertoajeweler,
shownherabedofsapphires,onlyarguedwhenshe’dfirsttriedtopickasmallerstone.Theringwas
morethanabreathtakinggem.Itwasasymbolofsomethingshe’dbeensopositiveshe’dneverhave.
She’dalwaysbeenpositivethatmarriagewasn’tforher.Shelikedmenfineandtotallyadoredkids.
ButsomanycouplesinEastwick,includingherparents,seemedmorelikebusinessmergersthan
loveaffairs.Sexwasacommodityprettymuchlikeanyother.Emmadidn’tknockanyoneelse’s
choices,shejustneverwantedthatkindoflife.YetwhenReedaskedhertomarryhim,well…maybe
he’dnevermadeherheartraceorhermoodgogiddy,butdamn.Hewassuchagoodguy.Impossible
nottolove.Whenitcamedowntoit,she’deasilysaidyes,recognizingthathewasprobablytheonly
manshecouldimaginebeingmarriedto.
Today,shefeltnodifferentlythanshe’dfeltthedayhe’dslidtheengagementringonherfinger.
Itwasjust…shecouldn’tseemtoquellthestrange,edgysensationofpanicthathadbeenhounding
hermoodforhoursnow.“Ican’twaitfortonight!”sheassuredhimbrightly.
Butwhenshehungupthephone,guiltsmackedherintheheart.Whatkindofgoofywomanwas
shethatshe’dratherspendtheeveningunpackingoldcratesinthebackofhergallerythangoouttoa
romanticdinnerwithamansheloved?
Four-thirtyintheafternoon,anyweekdayafternoon,alwaysturnedintoaworkfrenzy.Garrett
Keatinghadhiredadriveraboutfouryearsago,notbecausehedidn’tenjoydrivinghimself—even
inthecrazinessofdowntownManhattan—butbecausethecrisesautomaticallyseemedtokickin
duringthatlate-afternoontimeframe.Thisafternoon,typically,he’dlefthisinvestment-bankingfirm
lessthantenminutesago,yethiscellhadrungnonstop.Ashesatinthebackseat,hisbriefcasewas
openandpaperswerescatteredeverywhere.
“Keating,”hebarkedintothereceiverforthelatestinterruption.
Anunfamiliarfemalevoiceanswered.“Mr.GarrettKeating?CarolineKeating-Spence’sbrother?”
Immediateworryclawedhispulse.“Yes.What’sthisabout?”
“Yoursisteraskedustocallyou.ThisisMrs.Henry,theseniordaynurseinICUatEastwick—”
“OhmyGod.Issheallright?”
“Webelieveshewillbe,intime.Butthecircumstancesarealittletouchy.Yourparentshavebeen
here,buttheyseemtoupsetyoursistermorethanhelp.BecauseMrs.Keating-Spenceisinsucha
fragilestateofmind,whensheaskedforyou—”
“I’llbethereasfastasIcanmakearrangements.Whichwillbeimmediately.Butwhatexactlyis
wrong?”
“Iwouldn’tnormallysayoverthephoneifyoursisterhadn’taskedmetoconveyatleastpartofthe
situation.Herhusbandisoutofthecountry.Herparentsarepossiblytooupsettomakethesituation
easier.So—”
“Justtellme.”
“Shetookinanextensivequantityofmixedalcoholandmedication.”Ashortsilence.“Herparents
—yourparents—arequitedeterminedthatyoursisterdidthisaccidentally.Nooneonthemedical
staffhasanydoubtthatyoursisterhadtoknowexactlywhatshewasdoing.”Anothershortsilence.“I
believeitbesttobeblunt.Whenshefirstcamein,noonewassurewecouldbringherback.That
medicalcrisisisovernow,but—”
“I’llbethere,”Garrettsaidswiftlyanddisconnected.
Ed,hisdriver,methiseyesintherearviewmirror.“Soundslikethere’saproblem?”
“Yes.Ihavetoleavetown.Immediately.I’llgiveyoualistofthingsI’dappreciateyourhandlingat
theapartment….”
Garrettrannonstopforthenextfewhours,fearandguiltshadowinghisheart.Hehandledmillions
ofdollarseveryday,juggledapressure-cookerworkload,sohowhadhefailedsobadlyatfindinga
fewminutesforhissister?
Onthelong,silentdrivetoEastwick,hecouldn’tstopthinkingaboutCaro.Headoredhissister.
They’dalwaysbeenthickasthieves,alliedagainstparentswho’dneverhadtimeorinterestinraising
children.WhenCarolinemarried,naturallyGarretthadretreated.Butayearago,whenheheardshe
washavingtroublewithGriff,he’dsteppedbackin,preparedtoshootthesonofabitch—anysonof
abitch—whodaredtohurthissister.
Allhislife,though,he’dbeenbetteratworkthanrelationships.
Businesshadbeengood,exceptthathe’dalwayshadahardtimeputtingalidonhisworkaholic
tendencies.Makeonemillion,naturallyhewantedtomakefive,thenten.Hewasgenerallyconnected
toacomputeroraphonetwentyhoursoutoftwenty-four.Somaybehehadnolovelifeorpersonal
life,buthewasthriving.
Hewassurehe’dbeenthriving.
ButthenCarolinehadcalledfourdaysagoandhejusthadn’tfoundthetimetocallherback.She’d
calledagainyesterdaymorning.He’dbeenplanningtocallhertonight.Really.Forsure.
Only,damnit,maybehe’dhaveforgottenthatthewayheforgoteverythingelselately.Business
hadconsumedhimtighterthanatornadowind.
Hissister,who’dalwayscountedonhim—whoknewshecouldcountonhim,who’dneverdoubted
he’dbethereforher—hadneededhelp.Andhe’dflunkedthecourse.
BythetimehereachedtheoutskirtsofEastwick,nighthadfallen,hisstomachwaschurningandhis
heartfeelingsharp-sick.Itwasn’tjustguilt;itwascaring.Somanypeoplebelievedhewascold-
blooded—andmaybehewas;thatwaswhatmadehimgoodinbusiness.Buthewasn’tcoldabouthis
sister.Hefiercelylovedher.
He’djustfailedherthistime.Andhecouldn’t,wouldn’t,forgivehimself.
Atthehospitalhelockedthecarandjoggedforthedoor,stillwearingthenavysuithe’dwornall
day,nothavingeateninGodknowshowlong.Hedidn’tcare.Heshotthroughthedoors,jabbedthe
elevatorbuttonforthree,ran.
Hehadn’tbeenhome—muchlessnearEastwickGeneralHospital—inabluemoonandthensome.
Butthestructurehadn’tnoticeablychangedsincehewasakid.He’dhaveknownhiswayaroundeven
ifhisfamilyhadn’tdonatedawingortwoovertheyears.Criticalcarewastheisolatedunitoffthe
thirdfloorintheback—thelocationchosenbecauseithadahelipadontheroof.
TheCCwingwasquiet.Thesoundofmachinesandmonitorsmademorenoisethanthepatients.
Lightsdimmedafternine.Hedidn’timmediatelyseeanurseordoctor,sosimplyhikedpasteach
glass-dooredcubicle,lookingforhissister.Theunitheldonlytenbeds,usuallymorethanneeded
eveninemergencycircumstances.Sixbedswerefilled—notoneofthemwithhissister.
Finallyhefoundadoctoremergingfromthelastdoor.“I’mGarrettKeating.Iwastoldmysister,
CarolineKeating-Spence—”
“Yes,Mr.Keating.Shewashereuntillatethisafternoon.Wejustmovedheracouplehoursagotoa
privateroom.”
“Soshe’sbetter.”Forthatinstant,itwasallhewantedtohear.
“You’llneedtospeakwithherdoctor,butthenursewilltellyouherroom—”
Morerigmarole.Morerunning.Hetookthestairsratherthanwaitingfortheelevator—he’dnever
beengoodatwaiting,andtherewasn’tachancehecouldpretendtobepatienttonight.Room201.
That’swheretheytoldhimtogo.Aprivateroomwithatwenty-four-hourmonitor.Garrettsuspected
themonitormeantthateitherhissisterwasn’toutofthewoodsyetorthattheyfearedshe’dtry
suicideagain.
Eventhenursehadn’tspecificallyusedthewordsuicide,butGarrettimmediatelyknewwhatshe
hadn’tsaid—becauseheknewhissister.Thislastyear,onceshe’dmendedthebreachwithher
husband,Carolinehadseemedsolidandhappy,notasfragileasshe’dbeenforsolong.YetGarrett
knewher.Howthebaggageoftheirchildhoodhadaffectedher.Howdeeplyshefeltthings.How
fiercelyshehidthosefeelings.
Somepeoplewouldneverbuythefarm,butCarolinewasalwayssomeonewhocouldn’tquiteclose
thegatetodepression.
Hescrapedahandthroughhishairandsuddenlyhaltedoutside201.Hefeltasifhe’dbeenrunning
hell-bentforleatherforhours,whichwasfinebutnothowhewantedhissistertoseehim.Heforced
himselftostandstillforafewminutes,pullitalltogether,concentrateonpullingoffanimageof
calmstrength.
Anursebuzzedpasthim.Thentwoaides.Hetookasteptowardthedoor,whensuddenlyawoman
walkedoutofCaroline’sroom.Shealmostranstraightintohim—wouldhaveifhehadn’t
instinctivelyreachedouttosteadyher.
Herheadshotup.Amaneofsilkydarkhairfelltoshoulderlength,framingacameoface—elegant
bones,hugeeyesbluerthanviolet,apalemouthwiththelipstickwornoff.
Herstrikinglookswouldhaveransomedhisattentionevenifhedidn’tknowher…buthedid.
Hernamedidn’tpopintohisheadinthatsecond,probablybecause,hell,hismindwasgoneafter
thesepaststress-packedhours.Yetstressornostress,heimmediatelyrememberedhereyes.He
rememberedkissingher.Heremembereddancinginthegrassatmidnight,rememberedlaughing…
thewayheneverseemedtolaughwithotherpeople,notthenornow.Butshewasdifferent.She’d
madehimlaugh.Madehimfallharderinlovethanacrash.
Ofcourse,thatwasaeonsago.
Alifetimeandmore.
“Garrett,”shesaidgently.“I’msogladyou’rehere.”
“Emma.”He’dknownhernameallalong.Itwasjustthatthememorieshadrushedintohishead
fasterthantheprosaicfacts.“You’vebeenwithmysister?”
“Yes.It’spastvisitinghours,but…”Shehesitated.“Ithinknoonewantstoleaveheralone.Your
parentswerehereuntilaboutahalfhourago.Infact,Ijuststayedinthehall—butIheardhertalking,
realizedshewasupset.SowhenIsawthemleave,Iwentin.Ididn’tknowwhatelsetodo.Excepttry
tobethereforher.She’sfallenasleepnow.”Againshehesitated.Awispofasmilesoftenedherface.
“It’sgoodtoseeyou.”
“Notunderthesecircumstances.”
“No.Infact,Irememberyoursayingyou’dnevercomebacktoEastwickifyoucouldhelpit.”
Herememberedthatsuddenly,alltoowell.Itwaswhyhe’dbrokenitoffwithherallthoseyears
ago—becausehe’drathergiveupanything,everything,thanliveinthisdamntown.Butthatwashow
he’dfeltattwenty-one,anagewheneverythingwasanultimatum.Anagewhenyouassumedyou
didn’tneedanyoneever.Anagewhenitwassoamazinglyeasytobeself-righteous.
NowhelookedatEmmaandthoughtshe’dgrownintoherlooks.Sheusedtobelovely,butshe’d
gonefarbeyondlovelynow.Shewaswearingbluepants,adarkcottonsweater.Dressedcomfortably
forahospitalvisit,nothingfancy,butherchoiceofclothesshowedoffherlong,leanbody.There
wasprideinherposture,inhereyes.Apoiseshe’dneverhadasagirl.
Aloneliness.
Shelookedasifshewantedtosaysomethingelse,butthenshookherhead.“You’llwanttogointo
seeher.AndI’mjustleaving—”
“Emma,ifyouwouldn’tmind…”
Shecockedherhead.
“Idowanttoseeher.Rightnow.Butifshe’sfallenasleep,couldyouwaitjustacoupleminutes?I’d
appreciatehearingyourimpressionofwhatthesituationis—”
“Herdoctorcantellyouthefacts.Ireallydon’tknow—”
“I’llgetallthat.ButI’dliketheopinionofafriend.Thatis,ifyoucansparethetime?Irealizeit’s
alreadylate.”
“OfcourseIcansparethetime,”shesaid.
Againsheofferedhimasmile.Asmilelikeagift—that’showheusedtothinkofsmilesand
laughterfromher.She’dgivenhimsomuch,sofreelyfromtheheart.Everymomentwithherhad
beenlikediscoveringsomethinghe’dneverknownhe’dmissed.
Justseeingherfacebroughtthatfeelingback.
Butthen,ofcourse,hestrodeintoseehissister.
Two
EmmapacedthehallwayoutsideRoom201,glancingatherwatcheveryfewminutes,thinkingthat
sheshouldn’tstay.Itwasn’tasifsheweredirectfamily,nottoGarrettorCaroline.Shehadnoreal
businessbeinghere.Shewasjustafriend.Andshecouldn’thelpfeelingawkwardbecauseofher
historywithGarrett.
ButthenhestumbledoutofCaroline’sroom,andherbreathcaughtjustlookingathim.
Hewasn’tthatbrash,sexyboysheremembered,theonewhosekissesmadeherkneesknock,made
herpulsezoom,madeherfeellikeawomanforthefirsttime.Butdamnedifthelookofhimdidn’t
sendacrazyrushstraighttoherhormones.
He’dlookedlikeKeanuReevesasaboy.Hewasstilltallandlean,stillhadthedarkhairand
magneticeyes.WearinganItaliansuitandlinenshirt,heradiatedsophistication—evenasrumpled
andexhaustedasheobviouslywas.Evenwhipped,though,shesawthepowerinhisface,inhiseyes.
Theirhistorysuddenlypinchedherheart.He’dfiercelywantedtogetoutofEastwickbackthen—
primarilytoescapehisoverbearing,controllingparents,aproblemshecouldpositivelyrelateto.
She’dwantedtomattermoretohim,tofactormoreinhisdecisions.Andhadn’t.Itwasn’tassimple
asescapingproblemsforGarrett.HeusedtowearaT-shirtthatsaidIt’sMoreFunToPlayInThe
DeepEnd.Andthatwashim.He’dneverwantedaneasylife,didn’texpectone.Hewantedtocarvehis
ownniche,totakealltherisks,tomakeamarkwithhisownnameonit.
Emmaknewfromgossipthathe’dgoneafterhisgoalswithbothresolveandambition—andnever
lookedback.Evenso,hedidn’tlooksomuchlikeahighrollerintheinvestmentworldnow.Closer
up,shecouldseethepinchedlinesaroundhismouth,theanxietyandworryinhisexpression.
“Thanksforwaiting,”hesaid.
Shematchedhissubduedtone.“I’mguessingCaroline’sstillasleep?”
“She’soutforthecount.Ididn’twanttoleaveher…buttheredoesn’tseemanypointinsittingthere
whenshe’ssodeeplyunder.AndIhavetobelievesheneedstherest.”
Emmanoddedinagreement.“I’mguessingyourushedoutofNewYorkthisafternoon?Haveyou
hadachancetogetanydinner?”
Heshookhishead.“ButIdon’twanttogofar.Ifyoudon’tmind,Ijustwanttotalktoyoufora
coupleminutes.”
“Sure.Thehospitalcafeteriaispitiful,butweshouldbeabletoscareupasandwichorsomething
reasonablyedible.”Sherealizedhedidn’twanttobefartherthanrunningdistancefromhissister,but
itwasn’tthathardtopersuadehimintoaquicksnack.
Thefoodchoicesinthecafeteriawereasghastlyasshe’dpromised.Thebesthecouldchoosewas
adryturkeysandwichondrywholewheat,stalechips,acupofpitch-blackcoffee.ButEmmacoaxed
himtocarryitoutside,awayfromthesterilehospitalsmellsandsights.Justbeyondthesidedoors
wasaminilandscapedgardenwithcementbenchesinthemoonlight.
“Feelsgood,”headmitted,takingoneofthebenches.Bothoftheminhaledthefreshair.Asecurity
lightbeamedenoughreflectionsotheyweren’tsittingindarknessyetfeltthefreedomofthe
shadows.Emmacouldalmostseehimrelax—ortryto.
“Ikeepthinkingthisismyfault,”heconfessed.“Carolinecalledmetwicethisweek.Iwasbusier
thanhell,gotthemessages,justplannedtocallherbackwhenIhadtime.Sheneversaiditwas
importantorcritical,butwhenthehospitalcalled,myheartjustseemedtoleapinmythroat.”He
suckedinabreath,turnedtolookather.“Wouldyoutellmewhatyouknow?”
Emmaonlywisheditweremore.“Iseeherquiteoften—intownoratdifferentfunctions.We’renot
ascloseassisters,butI’vethoughtofherasafriendforyears,Garrett.I’dhavehopedsheknewshe
couldturntome.ButtheonlyrecenttroubleIknewshehadwaswithGriff,andthatwasagesago.”
Henodded,unwrappedthesandwich,sighedatthelookofitandthencruncheddown.“Thatwasmy
impression,too.Thatthemarriagehadhealedup.Carolinehadtoldmemorethanoncethattheywere
happierthanthey’deverbeen.”
“That’showitlookedtoeveryone.They’vebeenlikenewlywedsinpublic.I’massumingsomeone
toldyouthathe’sgonerightnow.Athree-orfour-weektriptoChina,Ithinksomeonesaid.But
Carolineneversaidanythingaboutanytroublesincetheyreconciled.”
“Griffalwaystraveled.Ithoughtthatwasoneoftheproblemsbetweenthemoriginally—allhis
timeawayfromher,overseas.”Garrettgulpeddownanotherdrybiteofsandwich.“Idon’tthinkhe’s
beengonelikethisinawhile,though.Andit’sreallyrarethathecouldn’tbereachedbyphone.”
“I’msurehe’llgethereasfastashecan.”
“Rightnowtheonlyquestionthatmattersiswhy’dshedothis?Whatcouldpossiblyhavebeenso
wrongthatshe’dconsidertakingherownlife?”Garrettbuncheduphispaperplateandnapkin.“If
somebodyhurther,I’llfindout.Believeme.ButrightnowIdon’thavethefirstcluewhatcouldhave
beensobadthatshefeltdriventodothis.”
Itwasn’taprettypicture,Garrettconfrontingsomeonewho’dhurthissister.Emmathoughthislean
build,elegantsuitandurbanappearanceweremisleading.Ifshewerestuckinanalleywithamuscle-
boundguyversusGarrett,she’dtakeGarrettanytime.Hisbackbonehadalwaysbeensteel,his
charactertoostubborntoeverbackdown—evenwhenheshould.
“Shehasn’tbeenconfidinginanyone,”Emmasaid.“We’veallaskedeachother.Everyonewantsto
helpandfeelsbadly.Butmaybeshe’llstarttalkingnowthatyou’rehome.”Shehesitated.“Idon’twant
tosayanythingnegativeaboutyourparents,butit’sbeenprettyobviousthatshehasn’twantedtosee
themorsayanythingtothem.”
“Nosurprisethere.”
Hedidn’tsaymoreonthatsubject,buthedidn’thaveto.Emmaknewhisparents.HisKeatingswere
similartoherDearborns.Bothfamilieshadseriousmoney.Bothfamiliespush-pulledtheiroffspring
toplaythedynastygamebytheirrules.
Garretthadneverbeensuckedin.NotthewayEmmaknewshehad.Butshe’dstayedsingle,fought
allherparents’effortstomarryheroff,asawayofdrawingthelineontheircontrol.They’dardently
wantedhertomarryintoa“goodfamily,”haveoffspringtocarryontheDearbornlegacy.
SometimesEmmafeltasifEastwickhadabitincommonwithmedievalcastlelife.Thewealthy
crowdshe’dgrownupwithhadbelievedthatsexwasacommodity,thata“smart”womanmadea
goodmatch,usinganyandalltoolsshehad.Thewomeninherpackknewearlyonthatawomanwas
expectedtosexuallypleaseaman.Itwaspartofthejob—awoman’sjobtoattractandkeepthealpha
guysinthepack.
Maybethatwastherealworld.That’swhatpeoplekepttellingher.Somanypeopleseemedtothink
thatwomenprettieduprelationshipsbycallingthem“love,”whenrealitywassurvival,andsurvival
forawomanmeantnailingthebestprovider.Sexwasapowerfultoolforawomantousetocatchthe
bestguy.FriendsthoughtofEmmaasnaiveforbelievingotherwise.Sheneverarguedwiththem.She
justdidn’twanttolivethatway.Maybetherewasnofairytale,butshepreferredtolivealonethan
inviteasexualrelationshipwhereherperformancecamewithagradeattached.
“What?”Garrettaskedher.“Fromtheexpressiononyourface,something’sonyourmind.”
Sheshookherheadwithawrysmile.Heavenknewwhyhermindhadcurveddownthatroad,
exceptthatshe’dwantedtogiveGarrettachancetofinishhisminimealinpeace.Andbeingwithhim
hadprovokedmemoriesofthatwild,crazyexcitementshe’dfeltwithhim—nothingtodowith
gradingcardsorskillsorsexbeingacommodity.She’djustfiercelywantedhimwithallheryoung
seventeen-year-oldbody.Butthatwasagoofythoughtpath,especiallyforthismoment,whenhehad
somanyseriousthingsonhismind.“Whereareyoustayingwhileyou’rehome?”sheaskedhim.
“Withtheparents.”Hesighed.“Tobehonest,stayingthere’smylastchoiceintheuniverse.Butat
leasttostartwith,Ineedtogetabetterpictureofwhat’sgoingonwithmysister.Theymaynotbe
closetoCarolineemotionally,butI’mstillhopingtheyhavesomeclue.”
“Itjustwon’tberestfulstayingwiththem?”
“Tosaytheleast.”Heturned,anditwasasifhetemporarilyforgotallhisfamilyworries.Notfor
longbutjustforthatmoment,helookedatherfaceframedinmoonlight,herquietsmile.And
suddenlytherejustseemedthetwoofthemaloneintheirownprivateuniverse.“I’mgladIraninto
you.”
Soblunt.Solikehim.“Likewise.It’sgoodtoseeyouagain.Notunderthesecircumstances,but—”
“I’vethoughtofyou.Somanytimes.”Heneverdroppedhiseyes.“IknowIhurtyou,Emma.”
“Yup.Youdid.Butthere’sbeenalotofwaterunderthebridgesincethen.Wewerebothyoung.”
“Icared.Infact,Ilovedyou.”Againhisgazeseemedtosweepherface,herhair,hermouth.Allof
her.“Don’tthinkIdidn’t.ItwasneverthatIwantedtoleaveyou,wantedtohurtyou.Iwasjust
frustratedandangryatthelifeIfeltforcedintohere,alwaysatwarwithmyfather.Icouldn’tstay
here.”
“Iunderstoodthenandnow,Garrett.Thehurt’slonghealed,honestly.”Shesmiled.“Totellyouthe
truth,Ithinkofyou,too.Oncethehurthealed…theywerejustgoodmemories.Nothinglikethatfirst
feelingofbeinglove,isthere?It’sthekindofmemoryyoucantakeoutonarainydayandjust…
enjoy.”
“Trustawomantosoftenitup.WhatIrememberwasasexualhighsodamnedpainfulI’mpositive
Icameclosetodyingfromit.AllthoseFridaynightswetookablankettoSilverPoint…Remember
that?I’dgohomeandspendtherestofthenightinacoldshower.”
Shelaughed.“Yeah,right.”
Hewassmiling,yethiseyebrowssuddenlyliftedinacuriousexpression.“Youdon’tbelieveme?”
“Ibelieveyou’refullofthedevil,nodifferentthanyoualwayswere.”Shewasalongwayfromthe
shyteenagerwhoblushedwhenaguytriedalittleflirting.ButsomehowthelookinGarrett’seyes—
theelectricenergyofbeingwithhimagain—wasputtingahotsizzleinherpulse.Shewastoo
physicallyawareofhimforcomfort.Quickly,competently,shesteeredhimawayfrompersonal
topics.
Itworked.Infact,itmorethanworked.Astheminutespassed,shefeltrelievedthey’dfoundaway
totalknaturallytogetheragain.Heobviouslyneededandwantedtogetbacktohissister,butthese
fewmomentswithsomefreshairandalittlefoodhadeasedthetautstraininhisexpression.He’dso
clearlyneededtoclimbofftheanxietytrainforabit.Soshetoldhimaboutthecurrentscandalin
town—BunnyBaldwin’sdeath,theinfamousmissingdiaries,everyoneworryingaboutwhatsecrets
Bunnyhadknown,JackCartwrightbeingblackmailedandhismarryingLilyandhowmuch
happinesshadcomeoutofthathorriblemessinthelongrun….
Shedidn’ttalklong,justenoughtofillhiminonthetown’spersonalities.Theinstanthestartedto
lookrestless,shestoodup,andthenswiftlysodidhe.
“Iknow,”shesaidwithouthishavingtospeakup.“You’regoingbacktoCaroline.AndIneedto
headhomeandgetsomesleep.”
“Idoneedtogetbackupstairs.Butforallthiscatchingup,Istilldidn’ttakethechancetoask
anythingaboutyou.”Quickasasliver,heasked,“So—youaren’tstillontheloose,areyou?Youina
goodmarriage?”
“I’mengaged.”Theinstantthewordscameoutofhermouth,shefeltaflushofguiltbecause,
damn,shehadn’tthoughtofReedinhoursnow.Notthatshe’ddoneanythingwrong.Shehadn’t
touchedGarrettorkissedhimordoneanythingsuggestiveinanyway.
Yettheinstantshesaidengaged,hisexpressionimmediatelychanged.Itwasn’tasifhestopped
smilingather,but…thelightswentoff.Hequicklyclosedadooronpossibilitiesthat,untilthat
instant,shehadn’trealizedwasopen.
Yetonherdrivebacktotheartgallery,aloneinthedark,sheadmittedfibbingtoherself.
ShemightnothavetouchedGarrett,butshe’dthoughtaboutit.
Shemightnothavetakenhispersonalcommentsseriously,butherheartbeathadbeengalloping
likeayounggirl’s.
Shemightnothavedoneanythingwrong,butherdisloyaltytoReedwasstillreal.Andwrong.
Mostofthetimeshelivedatherparents’house,whereshehadaprivatesuiteofroomsonthe
secondfloor.Oftenenough,though,sheworkedlateatthegalleryandthenjuststayedintown.
Tonightitwasalreadytoolatetodrivehome,sosheletherselfinthebackdoorofColorandslipped
offhershoes.
Severalyearsbefore,she’dconvertedasmallanteroomoffthefirstfloorintoahomeawayfrom
home.Shekeptbooks,cosmetics,severalchangesofclothesthere,buttheroomhadslowlybeen
fillingupwiththeoddestassortmentoftreasures.Atwo-centuries-oldChinesedesk,candleswrapped
inanecklaceofamethysts,awhitefurrugbythebed,anarrowLouisXIVmirror…Sheshookher
headatthewildassortmentoftenenough.Theywerethingssheloved,buttheycertainlydidn’t
representanystandarddecoratingstyle.Thesilliestofallwasaframedsign—ShallWeDanceinthe
Kitchen?—thatmeantnothingatall,exceptthatsometimesshewishedshewerethatwhimsicaland
romantic.Orthatshecouldbe.
Plunkingdownonthebed,shekickedoffhershoesandphonedherparentstoletthemknowshe’d
bestayingintown,thengotreadyforbedandswitchedoffthelight.Shewasbeat,yetsomehowshe
laythereforhours,staringatthefilmofwhitecurtainswhisperinginthewindow.Garrettrefusedto
leavehermind.
Itmadenosense.Hewasthewrongman.Reedwastherightman,themanshewassupposedtobe
marrying.Sowhycouldn’tshestopGarrettfromhauntingeverycornerofherthoughts?
Inthemorning,shepromisedherself,she’dcallReed.Firstthing.Anduntilthen,shementally
slappedherselfupsidetheheadanddeterminedtosquashhershamefulattitude.
Atleastshetriedto.
Garretthadn’tmeanttodozeoff,buthemusthave.Becausewhenheopenedhisscratchyeyes,his
neckandkneeswerecrampedfromsittinginthestraight-backchair.Thewallclockclaimedmore
thananhourhadpassed…andhissister ’seyeswereopen.
Helurchedoutofthechair,exhaustionforgotten,ashepickedupCaroline’shand.Hehated
hospitals.Neverknewwhattosayordo.Butonelookathissister—herfaceaspaleasthesheets,and
thesadlookinhereyesscaringhim—andhewantedtoshootsomeone.
“Garrett.”Shesaidhisnameasiftryingtotalkthroughamouthfuloffuzz.Still,herfrailvoice
managedtocommunicatereliefandloveatseeinghim.
“I’msorryIdidn’tcallyouback.Beyondsorry,”hesaidfiercely.“Idon’tknowwhyyoudidthis,
sis,andIdon’tcare.I’llhelpyoumakeitright.”
Shetriedtoshakeherhead.Theeffortseemedtoexhausther.“Youcan’t.But…gladyoucame.”
Shelickeddrylips.“Loveyou.”
“Loveyou,too.Iwantyoutorest.Wedon’thavetotalkaboutanythinguntilyou’reready.Ijust
wantyoutoknowthatI’mhere.I’llbehere.AndIwon’tletanyonepressureyouaboutanything,I
swear—”
“Garrett…”Herfingersclosedweaklyaroundhiswrist.“Iknowyouwanttohelpme.Butyou
can’tfixthis.Noonecan.Ididsomething…terrible.”
Shefellasleepbeforehecouldaskanythingelse,beforeshecouldtrysayinganythingelse.Garrett
wasn’tusedtoanythingshakinghim,butthedefeatandfearinhissister ’svoicerattledhimhard.He
satthere,worryingupastorm,untilanursecameinandshooedhimout.
He’dhavebattledthenurse—andwon—ifhethoughttherewasanythingfurthertogainfrom
stayingwithCaroline.Butrightthenitwasobvioussheneededrestmorethananything.Andifhe
wantedachancetogettothebottomofhissister ’smess,heneededtogetsomeresthimself.
TheKeatingestatewasashortfivemilesfromtown,atwo-storybrickhousesetonahillside,with
acurveddeckandasculptedslopinglawn.Itloomedinthemoonlightlikeagothiccastle.Heusedhis
oldhousekey,lethimselfinthekitchenentranceandimmediatelysteppedoutofhisshoes,not
wantingtowakehisparentsoranyofthehouseholdstaff.
Itstruckhisironicsenseofhumorthatheusedtotiptoejustlikethiswhenhewasateenager
sneakinglateintothehouse.Onestepintothelivingroomandhisbigtoecrashedintoachairleg.
Thatwasadéjàvu,too.
Moonlightfloodedinthewindows,sothatoncehiseyesadjustedherealizedhismotherhad
redecoratedagain.ThedecorthistimeseemedtobesomeFrenchperiod.Lotsofgiltandtassels.Lots
ofmeanfurniturelegs.Veryelegant,ifyouwentforthatsortofthing.Garrettdidn’t,andhistoewas
stinginglikeabanshee.
“Garrett!”Hisfatherswitchedonthelightfromthepaneleddoorsatthestairway.
“Dad.”Heofferedthehug,knowinghisfatherwouldn’tthinkto.“I’msorry.Ididn’tmeantowake
you.”
“Youdidn’t.”Merrittworepajamas,buthisiron-grayhairwasbrushed,hiseyestiredbutalert.
“YourmotherandIarebothup.Waitingforyou.Hopingyou’dgottensomethingoutofCarolinethat
wedidn’t.”
Upstairs,hisparentshadaminilivingroomofftheirsleepingquarters.Whiskeywaspoured,neat.
Hismotherpeckedhischeek,thencurledonthecouchinthewindowseatbythebaywindows.“Ihope
youtalkedtoher,”Barbarasaidimmediately.
Garrettplunkeddownonanoversizefootstool.Hewasn’tabouttoreplayhissister ’swords.“I
stayedforafewhours,butshewassleepingdeeply.”
“Ijustdon’tunderstandwhyshe’ddothistous!”
Garrettdidn’texpecteitherparenttoaskhowhewas,howhislifewasgoing.Theconversationwas
immediatelyaboutthem.“Carolinedidn’tdoanythingtoyou.Shedidittoherself.”
Hismotherrubbedhertemplesasifshewereattheendofherrope.“That’sthepoint.That’sthe
exactpoint.Everyonewilltalk.EspeciallywithallthisscandalaboutBunny’sdeathandthose
diaries…Nowthere’sjustmorefueltothegossipfire.Peoplecouldthinkwedidsomething,when
youknowwegavethatgirleveryadvantageadaughtercouldpossiblyhave.Iswear,Carolinewas
selfishfromthedayshewasborn—”
“Mom.She’stroubled.Shehastobeinmajordespairoversomethingorshe’dneverhavedone
this.”
“Oh,pfft.”Barbarastoodup,wavingherglass.“She’sspoiledandwantsattention.Likealways.She
doesn’tthinkofmeoryourfather.Orourreputationinthecommunity.Shehaseverythingsheever
wantedinthislife,butdoessheeverthinkofus?”
Okay.He’dbeeninhisparents’housealloftenminutesandalreadyhewantedtosmashawall.
Thatfast,herememberedwhyhe’dleftEastwickandneverlookedback.
Later,though,whenhelayinbedinthespareroom,herecalledhowhardithadbeentoleavehis
youngersisteralonebackthen.Andmorethanthat,howpainfulithadbeentoleaveEmma.
Rightnowitjustdidn’tmatterifhisparentsdrovehimascrazyastheyalwayshad.Hecouldn’t
leavehissistertothewolves.UntilherhusbandcamehomefromChina—anduntilGarrettwas
certainshewasgoingtobeallright—hewasstayinghere.Whichmeanthehadtofindawaytomake
hisbusinessworkhereforanindefiniteperiodoftime.
Beforedriftingofftosleep,Emma’sfacewhiskedintohismindagain.Herthick,glossyhairused
toswishallthewaydownherback.Nowsheworeitshoulderlength,butitwasstilllikemoonlight
onblacksilk.Soraven-dark,sorich,yetwithlightineverystrand.Hersoftmouthwasasevocative
asithadalwaysbeen.Sowerethoseunforgettableeyes,sodeepbluetheywerealmostpurple.Eyesa
guycouldgetlostin.
Godknowshehad.
Itstillpuzzledhimthatshehadn’tlookedathimlikeanengagedwoman.
Andthatherclassyclothesshowedoffasuccessful,poisedwoman…yetthatwasn’thowshe’d
lookedathimeither.
Fromthefirstsecondtheireyesmet,he’dsuddenlyrememberedrollinginthegrasswithher.
Stealingkissesafterfootballgames.Pressingherupagainstthelockerafterschool,feelingher
breastsagainsthischest,pretendingtobetalkingabouthomework.She’dblushandflushandfluster,
butthenshe’dlookathimfromunderthosethickblackeyelashes.Teasinghim.Emmahadloved
turninghimon,lovedthepowerofit,thefunofit,thejoyofit.They’dtemptedwickedeverywhich
wayfromSunday.She’dmadehimhotterthanfire—andfarmorefrustrated.
She’dbeenshybackthen,butthere’dbeennoguiletoher,noabilitytoholdback.Forsurethere’d
beennodistance.There’djustbeenallthathonest,helplessyoung-womanheatinhereyes.Thedare-
you-to-melt-my-boneslook.She’dturnedhimintoputty.
Andhe’dloveddyingfromallthosehard-onswithnorelease.
Buthellanddamnation,ifshewasengaged,howcomeshe’dstilllookedathimthatway?
Unguarded,winsome…asifsheweredyingtofeelthosefeelingsagain.Withaman.Withhim.
You’reimaginingallthis,hetoldhimself—andknewitwastrue.Hewassoul-tired,beyondthe
abilitytothinkclearly.Heneededagoodnight’ssleep—andthenheneededtoconcentrateonhis
sister.
Notonawomanwhowasalreadyclaimedbysomeoneelse.
Three
Afewmorningslater,EmmastoodoutsideColorwithacontractor.She’dbeenrunningnonstop,
organizinghertraditionalartshowinJuly,whenshe’drunintoamajormaintenanceproblem.
Thecontractorhikeduphisjeans.“Actually,ma’am,thehousedidn’tsuddenlystarttosinkonthat
side.Theproblemwaslikelydevelopingoveralongperiodoftime.”
“Well,noonenoticeditbefore.”Emmawantedtotearoutherhair.Amaintenanceproblem
certainlywasn’tnews.Two-hundred-year-oldhousesregularlydevelopedghastlyailments.Ifit
wasn’tdryrotoneyear,itwascorrodedwiringortermitesthenext.“Ijustcan’thaveabigmessright
now!CanweputofftheworkuntilOctober?”
“Well,Iwouldn’t,ma’am.”
“Youcallmema’amonemoretimeandyouwon’tseeOctober,either,”shesaidcrossly,and
sighed.“Okay.Let’sheartheplan.”
“Yeah,well,we’regonnaputupnewhousejacks.Takedownyouroldporchpillars.Reframe
pillarsaroundthenewhousejacks,buthinged,like,sothey’reaccessible.Thatwaywecoulddothis
slow,pushupthatsecondstoryasmidgeonatatime.Don’twanttocrackthisprettyfoundation,now,
dowe?”
Emma’seyesnarrowed.Hewassotwinkly.“Butwhydidthehousedecidetosinknow?”
“Takingawildguessnow…butprobablybecausethehouseisolderthanthehillsandthensome?”
“Easyforyoutojoke.You’regoingtochargeme,what,fivefigures?”
“Yup,inthatgeneralballpark,”heconfirmed.
Andtherewastherealrottenapple.HerthirtiethbirthdaywasonAugustthirty-first—soclosenow,
butnotcloseenoughtoaccessthetrustfundhergrandmotherhadestablishedforher.Inthe
meantime,sheknewherparentswouldfloatherthemoney,buttherewasalwaysaheavypricetagfor
thosegifts.
Toaddtothemorning’sconfusion,Joshchosethatmomenttopokehisheadoutthebackdoor.
“Mrs.Dearborn’sonthephone,Emma—”
“Ifyoudon’tmind,justtellmymomI’llcallherback,okay?Thanks—”
She’dbarelygiventhecontractortheokaytodestroyherspringbudgetwhenshenoticedawoman
pauseatthegateofthewhitepicketfence.Thewomanwassofamiliarandyetnot.Yearsbefore,
Emmahadattendedhighschoolwithagirlwhohadcurly,waist-lengthhair;worewildly
unconventionalclothesandhadanirrepressiblerebelliousstreak.Thiswomanwasgroomedtothe
teeth,agrown-updebutantebyEastwickstandardsineveryway,yettherewasjustsomething…
“Mary?”shecalledouthesitantly.“MaryDuvall?Isthatreallyyou?”
“Iwaswonderingifyou’drecognizeme,”thewomansaid.
“AsifIcouldeverforgetyou!”Emmaflewacrossthelawntowhiskopenthegateanddrawher
oldfriendintoahugehug,theday’sfrustrationsimmediatelyforgotten.“Ithoughtyouwerestillin
Europe,livingthehighlife.It’swonderfultoseeyou!”
“You,too,Emma.AndGod,Icouldsmackyou.You’reasbeautifulasever,except…”Herold
schoolfriendlaughedasshenotedthebitofclayunderEmma’sfingernails.“What’sthis?”
“Ivolunteeracoupleofhoursaweekatthelocalgriefcenter,workingwiththelittleones—andI
meanreallylittleones,thepre-Kset.Idofingerpaintingwiththemordrawingorclay.Loveit…”
Shechattedonamomentmore,tryingtoabsorbthechangesinheroldfriend.Maryhaddisappeared
rightaftergraduationtogopartyinEurope.Shewasanartist,Emmahadheard.Itwasjust…
unnervingtoseeherdressedlikeadowagergoingtoateapartywhenshe’dalwaysbeenso
flamboyantandunconventional.“Whatareyoudoingintown?Anychanceyou’rebackforgood?”
“IhavenoideahowlongI’llbehere.RightnowI’mjusthereformygrandfather.He’snotwell.At
hisage,therearen’talotofgreatchoices,youknow?Buthecan’tbealone,soI’mjustgoingtolive
withhimforawhile.”MarymotionedtotheColorssign.“ThelasttimeIwashome,yourgallerywas
justadream.”
“She’sstillmydream,”Emmaadmittedwithachuckleandthensnappedherfingers.“Say,didyou
bringanyworkhomewithyou?Anythingyou’dlikemetodisplay?Ihavearoomforlocalartists,
butespeciallyforyou,I’dalwaysfindaspecialspot.”
“Maybe.Ididbringsomeworkwithme.IfiguredI’dbesittingwithmygrandfatheralot,soI
mightaswellsetupaneaselwhileIwashome….Inthemeantime,what’snewwithyou?Married
now,kidsoranything?”
“Engaged.ToReedKelly.”
“You’rekidding!Reed,thehorsebreeder?Theracehorses—”
“Yup,that’shim.”
“Hewasolderthanusinschool,soIdidn’tknowhimwell,butIalwaysthoughthewassuchagreat
guy—”
“Heis,heis….”YetEmmafeltasuddenodditchinthemiddleofherback.Nothingpainful.Justas
ifamosquitohadsuddenlynailedher.
ShepurposefullyignoreditandtalkedafewmoreminuteswithMaryuntilshehadtoleave,and
heavenknewEmmahadmountainsofworkstillwaitingforher.Messageshadaccumulatedinher
office—threefromhermother.Afund-raiserhermotherwantedtoattend,aribboncuttingonanew
boutique,areceptionforavisitingsenator.NothingEmmawantedtodo.All,shesuspected,thatshe’d
getropedinto.Joshwasframingasetofcanvasesinthebackroom—stealingherfavoritejob,orso
sheteasedhim.
She’djustrunoutsidetoacceptadeliveryfromUPSwhenshespottedGarretthikingdownthe
walkofthereal-estateofficeacrosstheway.Heturnedinthedirectionofhergallery—probably
becausehiscarwasparkedonMaple—yetheseemedtoglanceinherdirectionalmostinstinctively.
Hissmilewasimmediate.Hisstridequickened.Bythetimehe’dcrossedthestreet,shehadthe
oddestsensationthathe’dbeentakingherin,headtotoe.Asaboy,he’dalwayshadthosebedroom
eyes—butteenageboysalwayshadtheirmindsononething.Itwascompletelydifferentfeeling
assessed—andappreciated—byamanwhoknewwomen,whoknewhowmuchfun—andhow
dangerous—therightkindofchemistrycouldbe.
Shewasn’tusuallyself-consciousaboutherappearance,butthiswasoneofherfreedays.She’dnot
onlystartedthemorningworkingwithlittlekidsbuthadalsoexpectedtospendtherestoftheday
withboxesandframesandladders.Herhairwascasuallypinnedupwithasimpleenamelclip.She
waswearinglipstickandhergrandmother ’sstar-sapphireearrings,butthatwasitforthefussing.Her
twillswereancient,herpurpleshirttoooversizetobeflattering.Yetheseemedtothinkshelooked
good,becauseasexualchargekindledinhiseyes.
Shefeltexactlythesamepotentcharge…anditscrapedonherconscience.Thatfirstnight,shehad
excuses—hissisterwasill,shehadn’tseenhiminsolong,shewastired,allthatstuff.Butnowshe
knewthatsizzlewasstrong,knewitwasn’tright,yetawarenessofhimstilltiptoeduphersenseslike
awickedsecret.
Evenso,whensherealizedthathewasobviouslyheadedforher,shedidthehospitablethingand
methimattheedgeoftheyard.
“Amazingwhatriffraffthisneighorhoodattracts,”sheteased.
Helaughed.“Sothisisyourgallery?”
“Sureis.”Shehesitated,notwantingtoinvitetroublebutfeelingtheincreasingneedtounderstand
whyhestillhadsuchatormentingpullforher.“I’vegotamountainofstufftodo—betyoudo,too—
butcomeinifyouhaveafewminutes.I’llgetyouacupofcoffee,showyouaround…How’s
Caroline?”
Hesuckedinabreath.“Notgreat.She’sstillnottalking—butsomethingclearlyhappenedtoher.
Thisisn’tlikeachemicaldepression.Somethingspecificallyhadtotriggerthis,somethingthat’s
killingher.Youhaven’theardanygossipintown?”
“Tonsofit.ButnothingeveraboutCaroline.Everyonelikesher,Garrett.Andeveryonewashoping
sheandGriffwouldgetbacktogetherwhentheyhitthatroughpatch.”Sheledhiminside.“Has
anyonereachedherhusbandyet?”
“Theykeeptrying.Messageshavebeenleftatallhiscontactpoints,soit’sjustamatterofhim
checkingin.DeepinsideChina,communicationsjustaren’twhattheyarehere.”
Joshpokedhisheadouttosayhello.ShebroughtoutamugofjavaforGarrett,thengottrappedon
thetelephonewithacustomer.Bythetimeshecaughtupwithhim,he’dobviouslybeenfreely
wanderingaround.“MyGod,Emma,whatyou’vemadeofthisplace.”
Hisenjoymentbuoyedherspiritsasnothingelsecouldhave,soshecouldn’tresistshowingoff
someofherfavorites.Rightinsidethelobbywasafishtank—notfilledwithfishbutwithamermaid
sculptedinmarbleandinlaidwithpreciousandsemi-preciousstones.“Ifoundtheartist—andthis
crazy,wonderfulpiece—inatinyjewelrystoreinupstateNewYork.”
“Oneofthosewho-can-believe-itkindofthings?She’s…riveting.Hardtotakeyoureyesoffher.”
ThatwasexactlyhowEmmahadalwaysfelt.“Comeon,I’llwhiskyouaroundupstairs.”
Shedidn’thavetocoaxhim.Todayhewaswearingcasualchinos,adarkpolo.Asateenager,he’d
beenaworkaholicandahard-coreoverachieveryetalwaysfriendlyandgregarious.Hewasstilleasy
totalkto,butmaturityhadgivenhimaninnerquietness.Hisemotionsdidn’tshowthewaytheyused
to.Hehadthatmover-and-shakerlook,thatkindofvirile,vitalenergy,evenwithhisemotionslocked
outofsight.Shewondered—shehoped—thathe’dfoundsomeonetolovehim.Reallylovehim.
Becauseheseemedvitallyalone.
Beware,whisperedherhormones.
Butshewasawarenowandhadeveryintentionofbeingcareful.
Surelyitwasn’twrongtofeelcompassionforhim,though.Hissisterwasinthemiddleofa
frighteningcrisis,afterall.
SheshowedhimherOrientallacquerroomandthelong,skinnyhallwhereshedisplayedarange
ofOrientalcarpets.Shereservedthefareastroomforwomen’sart—sculptures,oils,watercolors,
cameosofwomeninallshapesandforms.Thewestroomacrossthehallechoedarangeofartabout
males—mensleeping,studying,working,fighting,enjoyingguyhobbies.Downafewdoorswasher
“roomoflight,”whichdisplayedworkwithgems.
“Sheesh,Emma.You’veputtogetherthemostuniquegalleryI’veeverseen,”hesaid.“Thewayyou
presenteverythingisjust…fun.Butit’salsothoughtfulandinteresting.”
“Quitbeingsonice.It’sgoingtomyhead.”Butdamn,itwasnicetoshareherlove.She’dputaton
ofthoughtintoeveryroom,everypiecesheusedfordisplay,everyartistshechosetorepresent.
“Hey,youhaven’tsaidwhatyouweredoingatthereal-estateoffice.Yousuddenlythinkingabout
buyingpropertyinEastwick?”
“Whenhellfreezesover,”hesaidwryly,buthemotionedtothesheafofpapersunderhisarm.“I
pickedupalistofshort-termrentalsfromtheagent.”
“Ithoughtyou’dplannedtostayhome?”
“SodidI.”Histonewasrueful.“Ishouldhaveknownthatwouldn’twork.ButnowthatI’vebeen
aroundCaroline,talkedtoherdoctors,I’mafraidI’mgoingtobehereforawhile.Atleastafew
weeks.”
“Oh,Garrett.You’rethatworriedyoursisterisn’tgoingtorecoverfromthis?”
“Ijustdon’tknow.Infact,allIknowisthatIcan’tleaveher.AndI’lllikelygetonbetterwithmy
parentsifI’mnotundertheirfeet—andthey’renotundermine.”Hewalkedintotheupstairs
bathroom—justtoseewhatshe’ddoneinthere,asifheknewshe’ddonesomething.Andshehad.The
ceilingwasamuralofgraphiccomicart,allsuperheroes.Hecameoutchuckling—andclaimingto
haveacrookinhisneck—butheprettyswiftlyreturnedtotheirconversation.
“Anyway…IdecidedI’dbetterlookforsomealternativelivingarrangement.Sofar,though,I’m
notthrilledwiththeplacesthereal-estateagentcameupwith.Allofthemareadistancefromtown.I
don’twantthat,don’twanttostayinahoteleither.It’seasyenoughformetoflyorhelicopterinto
NewYorkseveraltimesaweek.AllIneedisasimpleplacetosetupatemporaryoffice.Abed,a
minikitchen.Somequiet.Aplacetosetupacomputer,fax,printer,thatsortofthing.Idon’twant
anythingfancyorfar.”
Shefrownedthoughtfullyassheledhimbackdownstairs.“Ifyouwantaplaceintown,Iactually
knowofone.Justtwodoorsdown,infact.”
Garrettraisedaneyebrow.“Theagentclaimedtherewasnothingcloseintown.”
“That’sbecauseit’snotontheformalmarket.”Sheexplainedthesituation.Mostoftheoldhomes
ontheblockusedtoberesidential,butthey’dbeengraduallyturningintobusinesses—lawyers,
accountants,psychologists,brokers,thatkindofthing.Notthekindofcommercethatrequiredbig
parkingneeds,butquietenterprisesthatwerewillingtomaintainthehistoricalflavorofthebuildings.
“Anyway,myneighbor,MariettaCollins,isaholdout.Sherentedherupstairstoaboarder,awriter,
onlyherecentlymoved.Shedidn’tlistitbecausesheonlywantstorenttofriendsoffriends.Ihave
noideawhattheplacelookslike,Garrett,somaybeitwon’tsuityouatall.Butifyoulike,Icouldcall
her…”
Hedidlike.ItonlytookEmmaasecondtodialandfindouttheplacewasstillavailableforrent.
Garrettblinkedattheprice.
“Ican’timaginewhyshe’sgivingitaway.”
“Well,itcouldbeaclunker.ButIthinkshejustreallywantssomeoneshecantrustlivingabove
her.”
“Goodthingyouhadpull,huh?”Fromtheamusedsparkleinhiseyes,Garrettwasobviouslynot
usedtoanyonehavingtopullstringsforhim—likelyitwasusuallytheotherwayaround.
“Well,you’dbetterseeitbeforeyougetyourhopesup.Youmightdecidethereal-estateagenthad
betterideasforyou.”
“Therereallyisn’tmuchtorent.YouknowhowEastwickis.Everyonewantstoown.Andnoone’s
lookingtoencouragetransients.”
ShehadtolaughattheideaofGarrettbeingconsideredatransient.Andthoughheexpressed
concernoverstealinganymoreofherworkday,shewalkedovertotheplacewithhim.Sheknew
Mariettawouldbeuneasywithoutapersonalintroduction—andshewasalsoalittleworriedwhatshe
mighthavegottenhiminto.Iftheplacewasadisaster,shedidn’twanthimtofeelobligatedtotakeit
becauseofher.
MarriettaCollinstookonelookatGarrett,beamedandpromptlygavethemthekeytocheckoutthe
upstairsattheirleisure.
Emma’simpressionoftheapartmentwastheoppositeofGarrett’s.“Well,itisn’texactlyagarret,
Garrett,but—”
“Thatpunissick.I’vealwayslikedasicksenseofhumorinawoman.”
Shehadtochuckle—buttheapartmentwashardlywhatGarrettmustbeusedto.Afewcenturies
before,thestructurehadbeenatavernwherecustomerssleptupstairs—apparentlynexttoeachother,
sincetherewasonlyonemainroom.Obviouslythedetailshadbeenmodernized,butthecore
architecturehadbeenpreserved.Themellowoldfloorboardscreakedandgroaned,butthey’d
obviouslybeentreasured,becausetheywerepolishedtoahighgleam.Honey-pinepanelingframeda
smallstonefireplace.Thebathroomwasstrictlyutilitarian,butthetinykitchenareahadaneating
nooktuckedunderagracefulPalladianwindow,shadedbygiantelmsjustoutside.
“Thefurniture’sthepits,”Emmasaidruefully.
Garrettwascheckingouteverywindowview.“Spokenlikeawoman,”heteased.“There’sacouch
andachair.WhatmoredoIneed?”
“Somelamps.Somepictures.Somerugs,”shefussed.
“It’sgotadecentdesk.”Hemotionedtotherelicthatmay—may—havebeenateacher ’sdeskin
somecenturypast.Emmalovedantiques,butinthiscaseshethoughtsomeoneshouldhavehadthe
sensetothrowitout—inthatsamecenturypast.
“IguessIjustassumedthere’dbeaseparatebedroom.”Insteadadoublebedwastuckedinaside
alcove,slantedundertheeaves.
“Thiswaythere’llbelotsofairflow.Idealinthesummer.”
Shecheckedoutthekitchen,sincehedidn’tseeminterestedinopeningdrawersandcupboards
there.“It’sultraclean.Whichisgood.Butthereisn’tasingleplateordish.Nopans.Notevenasingle
setofsilverware.”
“Dishes.Whowantsdishes?Theplacehasoutlets.Lotsofoutlets.”Hebouncedbacktohisfeet
afterexaminingthelocationofalltheelectricalplugs.“Nosweatsettingupasystemhere.Andthe
windowsaregreat.Lotsoflight.”
Sheshookherhead.Therewaslotsoflightbecausethewindowswerebaldofanycurtainsor
shades—butGarrettwashappierthanakidatthecircus.Whocouldfathommen?Hewasusedto
money.Bigmoney.Nicethings,conveniences.“Well,itwouldn’ttaketoomuchtomakeitatleast
livable.Anditreallyisprettynicefortheprice—”
“Nice?Nice?Iwaspreparedtopitchatent.Thisisbetterthanadream.”
Thelunaticjoggedovertoher,makingherlaugh…untilshesawsomethingunexpectedinhiseyes.
Maybehehadn’tgivenintoafoolish,exuberantimpulseinsolongthathe’dforgottenwhatitwas
like.Shewasn’tabsolutelypositiveheevenknewhewasgoingtokissher.
Butsheknewbeforehewashalfwayacrosstheroom.High-poweredmenhadhigh-powereddrives.
Sometimesthereleasevalveslippedopenwhenitshouldn’t.AnddebutantesraisedinEastwick
weren’tsoft;theyonlylookedthatway.Emmaknewwhatwashappening,knewhowtogetoutofa
problemlikethisgracefully.
Andthatwaswhatsheintended—tocarefullyduckawayfromhim.Butheswoopeddownonher
withnoneofthefinesseandskillandtechniquesheremembered.Hewasjustaguyhighonlifefor
thatinstant.Justaguywithagoofysmileonhisface,swinginghisgirlaroundinacircletomakeher
squeal…justalittlehappinesslettingloose,nothingdangerous,nothingwicked.
Thefeelingofhislong,strongarmswrappingaroundhertriggered…something.Astillnessdeep
insideher.Shesuddenlywasn’tlaughing—orsquealing.Insteadherlipstilteduptomeethis,asifthat
weretheonlychoiceshehad.Theonlychoiceshe’deverhad.
SuddenlytheonlysoundintheroomwasthesweetJunewindwhisperingintheopenwindow.He
tookhermouthasifheweredesperateforthetasteofher.Shemoldedclose,asifsheweredesperate
tobeheld,notbysomeone,notbyaman,butspecifically,ohsospecifically,byhim.Thetasteofhim
createdafierce,strongpulldeepinherbelly.
Shelostherbalance.Hefoundit.Shelosthersenses,andhestolethose,too,liftinghishead,
searchinghereyeswithonelong,stillmoment…andthengoingbackforanotherkiss.Thistimewith
theglovesoff.
Tonguefoundtongue.Teethfoundteeth.Hishandsheldherheadstill,then,impatient,pulledatthe
cliptrappingherhair.Herhairspilledfree,throughhisfingers.Shewrappedherhandsaroundhis
wrist,butitdidn’tslowhimdown,didn’tstophim.Didn’tseemtostophereither.
Asifherbreastshadneverknownaman,theirtipstightenedandhardened,yetshepressedcloser.
Theybothbeganadanceofintimacy—adancewithoutmusicyetsoaboutrhythm,soaboutthesway
ofbreasttomuscle,ofsoftpelvistoturgiderection.Thedriftofherscentwaltzedtothescentofhis
soap,hisskin,him.Anotherdip,anotherkiss,andherheartpickedupafasterrhythmnow,asifhe’d
suddenlyspunherintoatangountilshecouldn’tcatchherbreath.Hisbreath,hiskisses,thestrength
ofhiships,pressedagainsthers,enticedhertomovewithhim,towanthim.
Want.
Whatawordforawomanwho’dhadnotimeforsex,whowasimpatientatthewholeideaofhow
muchimportanceeveryoneelseputonsex.Whojustwantedtoliveherlifewithpassionforallthe
wonderfulthingslifeofferedbutnotforpassion.
Okay,shekepttellingherself.Okay.Thisissomekindofaberration.Ghostsaren’treal.
Hallucinationsaren’treal.Hewasterriblystressed,shefigured.Thatwasallthiswasreallyabout.
He’dalwaysbeenaworkaholicbeyondallsanity,sothenhe’dcomehomeandbeenterriblyworried
abouthissister—andhe’dneverbeenaguywhotoleratedfrustrationwell.
Yeah.Thatwasit.Hewasjustlettingoffsteamwiththesekisses.
Onlyshewasn’t.Shedidn’thavesteamtoletoff.This…clingingtohim.Thiswildly,fiercely
kissinghimback.Thisteasinghim,rubbingagainsthim….noneofthismadesense.Itwasn’ther.
Thiswasn’tsex.Thiswasheart-altering.Thiswasn’tpassion.Itwastouchingatsomeotherlevel.
Down,down,downatthedeep,sadlonelinesslevel.Damnit,shehadn’tbeenlonelyinallthistime.
Shehadn’t.
Yethemadeherfeelthatway.
Asifshe’dbeenalonesincethey’dlastkissedasteenagers.Asifshe’dneedednooneuntilthis
moment.Asifshe’dbeencopingfine—whichshehad,shehad—untilGarrettcamehomeandtook
hermouththiswayandmadeitallcomecrumblingdown.
Shefelthishandssoothingdownherback,seducingwitheveryrub,everycaress.Hismouthstill
tookmorekisses,tookownershipofhersenses.Hespunheraround,pressedheragainstahoney-
pinewall.Theroughpinefeltgoodagainstherspine,areliefafterthatdangeroussilkmouthofhis.
Hishandsroamedherarmsnow,thenwhisperedbetweenthem,reachingforherblousebuttons.
Hereyesshotopen.
Hehadn’tfeltherbarebreastsyet.Theyhadn’tremovedanyclothes.Butacoupleminutesmoreof
this,andEmmawouldhavepeeleddownwithouthisasking.Withoutanytalk.Withoutherthinking
evenonceofherfiancé.
Shebrokeaway,slidoutfromunderhisarms,lookedathim—stricken—andthenshotoutthedoor
anddownthestairs.
Four
Atfirsttheskyonlydribbleddown,butinamatterofminutestherainturnedintoaflushing
downpour.Emmaflickedthewindshieldwipersonhigh,buttheycouldn’tkeepup.Thewindows
startedtosteam.ThankfullyReed’splacewasonlyafewmoremiles,becauseshecouldbarelysee.
HernervesechoedthesnapoflightningasshefinallyreachedthesignforRosedaleFarms.
Shehadtoseeherfiancé.Now.Thisafternoon.
Theembraceshe’dsharedwithGarrettwasstillgluedonhermind—andheart.Itwaswrongin
everywaytohavekissedanothermanwhenshewasengaged.Andworsethanthat—much,much
worse—wasrealizingshe’drespondedtoGarrettmorehonestlyandpassionatelythanshe’dever
respondedtoReed.
She’dassumedtheoldsizzleshe’doncefeltforGarrettwasthestuffofyounghormonesandfirst
love—thekindofthingawomanoutgrew.Shehonestlydidn’tknowshehadthatkindofsexualityor
sensualityinher.Didn’tknowlifeevenheldthatpossibilityforher.Andshehadnoideawhatallthese
feelingsforGarrettmeant,ifanything.Butrightnowwasn’tthetimetodealwiththat.
RightnowwhatsheabsolutelyhadtodealwithwasfacingReed.Therewasnomoredenyingthat
somethingwasgravely,fundamentallywrongwiththeirrelationship.Maybeshe’drealizedbefore
thattheyhardlyhadagrandpassionforeachother,butnotthattheyweremissingsomething
criticallyelemental.
Herwholeworldfeltshaken.Shekepttellingherselfthatafewkissesfromanoldloveshouldn’t
havethepowertoupendherlife.ButrealitywasmorethatseeingGarrettagainhadforcedopenold,
carefullylockedemotionaldoors.She’dnevermeanttolietoherself,butitseemedshehad.
Anxietythrummedinherpulse.She’dneverdeliberatelyrunfromtroubleorresponsibility.Her
motherhadtaughtherthat.Hermom,foraslongasEmmacouldremember,hadsneakedlittlenips
allthroughtheday“justtotaketheedgeoff.”Emmarememberedherchildhoodasnonstoptiptoeing,
tryingtobequietforhermother,tryingnottogivehermomyetanotherreasontotakeoneofthose
infernalnips.Sono,Emmawasalongwayfromperfect.Shedidthingswrong,mademistakes,
sometimesbadmistakes.
Butatleastshedidn’trun.
Yeah,right,shethoughtwrylyasshebrakedinfrontofthestables.Herheartwasthumpinglouder
thanthunder.Everywhereshelookedthereweretonsofvehicles—thebighousealwayshadabunch
ofcarsparkedoutside,andthisafternoon,withtherain,thebarnsandstableshadpickupsofallsizes
andshapeslineduplikeaparkinglot.
RosedalehadbeennamedafterReed’sgrandmother,andalthoughReedranthewholekitand
caboodle,hisentirefamilywasinvolved.Andneededtobe.TheKellysdideverythingrelatedto
horses—boarding,foaling,bloodstockmanagement.Reedownedandtrainedanumberof
racehorses,aswell,andhekeptafullrosterofpedigreedstallionsavailableforstudservice.The
placewasalwayspacked.
Inprinciple,Emmalovedriding.Butinrealityshe’donlydoneitthreetimesbecauseshe’dfallen
offallthreetimes—arunningjokebetweenherandReed,givenhisbusiness.Thepoint,though,was
thatallthosecarsandtrucksmeanthewasbusy.Still,Reedwasalwaysbusyatthistimeofyear,soif
shewantedtotalktohim,shehadtotrackhimdownhereandseeifhecouldstealafewminutes.
Therewasnowayshecouldbreakitoffwithhimonthephone—norwouldsheeverhavechosen
thatcoward’swayout.
Sheclimbedoutofthecaranddashedforthestableoffice—herfirstbestbetatfindinghim.Rain
soakedthroughherpaleblueshirtandpants,butitwasawarmenoughrain.Shewasinsidein
seconds.Horseysmellsimmediatelyrushedhernostrils—hayandhorsefleshandleatherandliniment
andyou-know-what.Truthfullyshe’dalwayslikedthesmells—eventheyou-know-what.Justbecause
horsesneverlikedherdidn’tmeanshewasn’tfondofthem.
Today,though,herstomachroiledtheminuteshesteppedin—notbecauseofthesmell,butbecause
sheimmediatelyheardthecrazedsoundsfromthefarendofthestable.Sheknewwhatthesounds
were,knewwhattheymeant.Amarewasbeingmountedbyastallion—aforce-feedsituationthat
Reedwasinvariablydirectlyinvolvedin,becauseanardentstallioncould,andoftendid,hurtamare
ifhumansdidn’tdirecttheactivity.Harnessesandpulleysandliftsandallkindsofunlikelythings
wereusedtoaidanadvantageousmating.Emmagotit.Advantageousmarriageswereabigdealin
highsociety,nodifferent.Butiftherewasanythingunromanticinthislife,itwasamareandstallion
get-together.
Instantlysherealizedthatshe’dbeenanidiottocomewithoutcalling—andaselfishidiotbesides.
Reedhadnevermindedanimpromptuvisitfromher,butthiswasdifferent.Shewasn’tjustvisiting.
Thispanickedrushtoseehimwasabsurd.Itwasn’tasifanythinghadtobesettledthatverysecond.It
wasguiltdrivingher,notreallyneed.
Beforeshecouldturnaround,Reedspottedherandseparatedhimselffromtheclutchofpeople
nearthebreedingstation.
“Emma!”
Oh,God.Hisfacelitupwithawelcomingsmile,asifshehadn’tobviouslycrashedhisbusyday.
“Whatagreatsurprise,”hesaidandswoopeddownforahug—thenstoppedwithasheepishgrin.He
didsmelllikehorseandmansweat—andeaudestableingeneral.Itwasoneofthethingssheloved
aboutReed,hisconsiderationforher.Butrightthenshedidn’tcare.Shewantedahugfromher
fiancé.
Shewanted,needed,somekindofproofthatshewascrazy.Ifshecouldjustfeelsomethingsolid
forhim—withhim—maybeshecouldtalkherselfoutofbreakingthisoff.Sheforcedawarmsmile.
“IcanseeIpickedtheworstmomentintheuniversetoseeyou.You’rebusierthanaone-armed
bandit.”
“Andwithoneofyourfavoritethings.ButHisHighnessfinallydecidedtoperform,soIbelievewe
cansneakawayfromtheunwillinglovebirds—”
Overhisshouldershecouldseeatleasttwopeopleturninhisdirectionasifwantingtoaskhima
question.“Darnit,”shesaid.“Ireallydidpickarottentime.Ishouldhavecalled.”
“I’dratherseeyouthandobusinessanytime.Butwhat’swrong?”Hesteeredhertowardthestable
office,whichwasn’tfar,butatleastitwasalittledistantfromallthepryingeyes.Reed,beingIrish,
hadacastofthousandsinhisfamily—allofwhomshelovedabunch.Theywerewarm,gregarious,
effusivepeople,exactlytheoppositeofherquiet,ultraprivatefamily.Buttheywerealsonosy.And
Reedledhisbusinessthesameway—likeafamily,withanyonewhocamebytreatedtoacupofjoe
inthekitchen,nofanfareandnoairs.
“Comeon,Icanseesomething’sonyourmind.Spillit,”heurgedher.Typicallyhisstableoffice
resembledtheaftermathofacyclone.Thephonehadthreeactivelines,theminifridgewasalways
stockedwithpopandbottledwaterandhisdeskwasheapedwithhorsebandages,racingschedules,
wormshotsandeveryotherthing.
Shetouchedherfingerstohertemples.Hetalkedsoeasily.Forher,italwaystookeffort.“Reed,I
justfeelthatweshould—”
Thephonerang.Hemadeamotionbeggingforpatience,hookedthereceiverinhisearandserved
herapopatthesametime.Therewasamix-upinsometrainingschedule.Heleanedagainstthedesk
whilemotioninghertotaketheoneandonlyseat—anoldleatherchairmeantforamantocrashfora
fewminuteswithhisfeetup.
Shecouldn’tsit.Shewaited,lookingatthismanshe’dagreedtomarrymorethanayearago.She’d
knownhimforever.HehadthoseIrishlooks—thebrownhair,thecleanskin,themischievoussmile.
Asakid,he’dbeengood-lookinginafresh,clean-cutway,butatthirty-five,he’dcomeintohisown.
Therewaskindnessinhischaracter,aneasywaywithpeople.Noamountofchaoseverseemedto
throwhim.Hisjudgment—asfarashorsesandbusinessboth—hadturnedthefamilyhorsefarminto
ahighlyprosperousenterprise.
Emmafelttheknottietighterinherstomach.Shelovedhim.Forreal.Therewasreallynodoubtin
hermindofthat.NoonecouldnotloveReed.Hewasanabsolutelysuperman.Goodtothebone.A
manyoucouldtrustthroughthickandthin.Afamilyman.
Whatwasnottolove?
“Okay,”hesaidwhenheclickedoffthephone.“You’vegotmyfullattention.”
Shetookabreath.Outside,sheheardarumbleofanengine—likeaneighteen-wheelerdrivingin.
Voiceszoomedpastthestableofficedoor.Ahorsewhinnied.Itwasliketryingtothinkinthemiddle
ofatornado.
Shetookabreath,thengaveup.“Reed,thisisnoplacetotalk.I’lljust—”
“It’sokay,it’sokay.”Hepushedthedoor,whichdidn’tcompletelyclosebutatleastcreatedalittle
privacybarrier.Thenheliftedhisphone.“I’mturningoffboththepagerandthephonerightnow—”
Butnotbeforethephonerangagain.Hefieldedthatcallquicklyandimpatiently.Thendidjustwhat
he’dsaid—turneditoffandtunedoutalltheotherinterruptions,aswell.Helookedatherintently.“I
knowwhatthisisabout.Yourmothercalledme.”
“Mymother—?”
“Apparentlyshethinksyoudon’twanttogotosomeshindigatthecountryclubonSaturday.The
formalJunedance?Soshetalkedmeintopromisingtogo.Iknow,Iknow,Ishouldhaveaskedyou.
Especiallyifyouwantedoutofthatdarnthing.Butdamn,she’sgoingtobemymother-in-law,so
whenshetwistedmyarm,Icouldn’tverywellturnherdown—”
“Iunderstand.No,no,it’snotaboutthat.”
“Allright,”hesaidcuriouslyandleanedbackagainstthedesk,hisattitudeoneofwaiting,asif
determinedtogiveherallthetimesheneededtosaywhateversheneededto.
Butsheheardanothermajorcommotionoutside—asifatruckhadarrivedandwasbeingunloaded.
Thiswasgoingnowhere.YetEmmatried,blurtingout,“Reed…doyourealizehowmanytimes
we’vepostponedsettingadateforthewedding?”
“Sothat’swhatthisisabout.Andyou’reright.Soright.Infact,WeddingsByFelicitycalledme.I
don’tmeanFelicity—itwasoneofherassistants,Ritasomeone…”
Emmatriedtoopenhermouthtointerrupt,butheliftedahand.
“It’smyfaultaboutthat,Emma.IknowFelicityisyourfriendandsheseemslikeagreatperson
besides.Butshe’sjustifiablytickedatusfornotsettingadate,especiallythislateinthegame.”
“Thethingis,”Emmatriedtointerject,“Ithinkthere’sareasonwe’vewaitedsolong—”
“Ido,too.YourgalleryhastheJulyshowcomingup.AndI’mbusierthanamagpiehere.Andsince
we’redoingtheceremonyatyourparents’house,itdidn’tseemlikeallthatmuchhadtobe
completelypinneddown,youknow?Imean,wedidn’thavetobookahall,andthephotographerand
masterchefarealreadyinthefamily,sowhatdifferencediditmakeifitwasthesecondorthird
SaturdayinAugust?”
“Reed…Ithinkthereasonforourprocrastinatingismorecomplicatedthanthat.”
Henoddedagain.“Yeah,Iknow.Truthis—andIknowit’sselfish—butIgetantsyanywhereneara
bigwedding.Callitaguything.Hell,itisn’tthepartypartofitImind.Youknowthat.Withmyclan,
they’dhaveapartyeverySaturdaynightifwecouldallsurvivethehangoversonSundaymorning.
Butit’sthesocietypartofitthatmakesmesquirm.NowthatBunny’sgoneandnoone’ssteppedupto
dothatEastwickSocialDiaryanymore,maybepeoplewon’tmakesomuchofeverywedding,but…”
“Reed,I’vealwaysagreedwithyouonthat.Ineverwantedabigwedding,either.Butoncemy
parentsgotinvolved,itwaslikebudgingtwoelephants.”Somehowshefoundherhandonher
stomachagain,pressinghardtoquellthesick,sadfeelinginside.“Ipostponeddecidingonawedding
dateasmanytimesasyouhave.”
“Andthat’sthething.We’vebothbeenrunningfasterthanratsinamaze.Ifwecouldjuststeala
solidblinkoftimetogether,wecouldsurelygetadatedowninink.”
“Yes,I’msurewecould.Butthequestionis…isthatwhatwewanttodo?I’mnotsopositivethatit’s
justbusynessthatmadeusbothpostponenailingdownaweddingdateforsolong.”
Hedidn’tlookhurt.Hedidn’tlookconcerned.Hedidn’tlookasifhewereremotelygettingherat
all.“Emma,youknowItendtodobetterifyoujustsayflatoutwhat’sonyourmind.Idon’tknow
whatyoumean—”
Abeanpolekidjammedahandthroughthedoorway.“Mr.Kelly.PrettyLady,theysaidsheleaped
thefenceintheeastpasture,takingoffafterWildWind.”
“Aw,hell.”Reedstartledstraight,grabbedhishatfromthedeskandthenlookedfranticallyat
Emma.
“No,it’sokay.Go.We’lltalklater—”
“Youcomefirst,Emma.Youknowthat.Butdamnit—”
“Iknow,Iknow.We’lltalkonSaturdaynightifwecan’tcatcheachotherbefore.Go,go,Icansee
thisisimportant.”
Shereallycould.Yetontheridehome,theskywasstillsendingdownblisteringtorrentsofrain,
echoingthemoodyrestlessnessinherheart.
She’dhandledthatallwrong.Barginginonhisworkday.Tryingtotalkaboutsomethingserious
withallthatchaosgoingon.Anditwasn’tasifshehadtohurryintothisconversation—shedidn’t
wanttohurtReed.Infact,she’dhopedterribly,desperately,thatseeinghimwouldmakeGarrettfade
fromhermind,wouldmakeherrememberallthereasonsshe’dagreedtothisengagement.
Butitseemedthatgoalhadboomerangedonher,becauseshedidrememberwhyshe’dacceptedhis
ring.Thereasonswerestillthere,stillreal.Theygotonaseasilyasoldslippers.Theywereboth
tiredofpeoplepushingthemintomarriage.TheybothhadlongtiestoEastwick.Sheadoredhis
family,respectedhisworkandhisdreams.Hetotallyrespectedhergallery,hergoals,thethingsshe
wantedtodo;infact,shecouldn’timagineReedinterferingwithanythingsheeversaidshewanted.
Yetwhenshecataloguedallthosereasonsinhermind,theproblemwasstillthere.
TheideaofmarryingReedwasincreasinglygivingherpanicked,shootingheadachesanditchy
hives.Maybeshelovedhim…butnotintherightway.ItwasGarrett,damnhim,who’dmadeher
realizetheheartfullofemotionsshewasmissing.Thelongingsheyearnedfor.Thedesiringand
beingdesiredthatherwoman’ssoulwhisperedfor.Thefeelingofbelonging…
She’dneverhadthosefeelingsinherlife.Growingup.Ever.Whoknewifitcouldevenhappen?
Butsheknewpositivelythatshedidn’thavethosefeelingswithReed.
Halfwayhome,shehitaredlightatWhitaker.Shesuddenlystartedcrying.Her.EmmaDearborn.
Whohadn’tcriedevenwhenshe’dbrokenanankleinsecondgrade.
Butitwasdamnscarytorealizeyouhadyourlifeallplannedintidylittlelines,andsuddenly
someonewasmakingyoucolorwithnolinesatall.
Garrettpushedopenthedoortothehospital,wishinghecouldshakeofflikeapuppy.Therainhad
turnedintoadownrightsoppydeluge.He’dbedrippinglessifheeverrememberedtocarryan
umbrella,butthatwasanonstarter,nevergoingtohappen.Theafternoonthreatenedtoturnintopure
wetsteam—whichmatchedhismoodalltoowell.
Thelastfewdayshadbeenmorefrustratingthanfindingamosquitointhedark.Settingupa
temporaryofficeandlivingquartersinEastwickhadbeeneasyenough,thankstoEmma.Buthis
sister ’sproblemsrelentlesslypreyedonhismind.
He’dbeeninterviewinganyoneinEastwickwhowaswillingtotalktohim—atleast,anyonewho
knewCaroline.Anditseemedasthoughmostofthetowndidandwaswillingtotalk.Onlynoone
seemedtohaveaclueaboutherprivatelife.Thismorningturnedintoatotalzero.
He’dstartedouttalkingwithLilyCartwright.Shewasasweetheartandahalfandatrue-bluehonest
kindofwoman.Butwhenhe’daskedtohavecoffeewithher,hehadn’trealizedshe’dbeasbigasa
whale.She’dclaimedshewasgoingtohaveababyinafewmonths.Hefiguredshewashavingthree
atleast.Butthepointwas,likeeveryoneelse,LilywastroubledaboutCaroline—butknewnothing.
Thenhe’dtriedVanessaThorpe,anotherofhissister ’sfriends.Becauseshe’dmarriedarich,older
man,thescandalmongerstsk-tskedbehindherback.Garrettcouldn’tcarelessaboutgossiporher
personallife.He’djusthopedsheknewsomething,anything,aboutCaroline—buthe’dstruckout
there,too.
Afterthat,he’dtrackeddownacoupleofmen.FrankForresterhadtobeseventy,nota
contemporaryofCaroline’s,butbecausehewassuchafixtureatEastwick’scountryclub,Garrett
thoughthe’dbeagreatsourceofinformation.Hewas,butnotaboutCaroline.
Harry,thebartenderattheEmeraldRoom,kneweveryone’ssecretsandthensome,buthewas
geneticallyrelatedtoaclam.Still,hesworehe’dhavetoldGarrettsomethingabouthissister ’shealth
ifhe’dknownanything.
BottomlinewasthatlotsofpeoplethoughttheworldofCaroline,butnoonehadthesmallest
inklingwhathadprovokedhersuddendepression.Garretthandledfrustrationaswellashehandled
finechina—whichwasanot.Healsoknewthatfearforhissisterwasn’ttheonlythingridinghis
mood.
Emmawas.
Hehadn’tseenherinseveraldaysnow.Betweentryingtorunhisbusinesslong-distanceand
trackingdownleadsonhissister,he’dhadnotimetocasuallyrunintoher.Butshamehadbeenriding
hisconscience,andhehatedthefeeling.
Godknowshehadfaults,Garrettthoughtasheloosenedhiscollarinthestiflingelevator.Hewas
selfish,singularlydirected.Hedidn’tplaylifebysoftballrules,neverwastedtimeplayingtouch-
tackletypeoffootballeither.Heplayedtowin.Alotofpeoplecalledhimstone-headed,aworkaholic
—butwomenalwaysclaimedhewasjustasrelentlessinthesack,agreatlover.
Andthatwasgood,hemused,exceptthatheknewhewaslousywhenitcametorememberingto
calllater.Infact,hisnamewasjutplainabsenteeinthelong-term-relationshipcolumn.
Thebuginhissoup,though,wasthathe’dneverhadawomanrunawayfromhim—nottheway
Emmahadrunouttheotherday.
Norhadawomanevercomealive,comeapartinhisarms.Notthewayshehad.
Hedidn’tcomeontowomenwhoweretaken.Ever.Poachingwasn’thisthing.Ever.Only,for
Pete’ssake,whatthehellwasEmmadoingrespondingtohimasifsheweretheloneliest,hottest
womaneverborn,ifshewashappilyinlovewithsomeguy?
Itdidn’taddup.
“Garrett!”
Justincaseheneededmoretroubletoday,fatesuddenlyproducedhismotherhustlingtowardhim,
comingoutofCaroline’shospitalroom.Hismom,typically,lookeddressedforteaattheWhite
House,lotsofcreamandpearlsandscentedfromheadtotoewiththesignatureperfumesomefancy
chemisthadcreatedforher.
“I’mso,sogladIcaughtupwithyou,dear.”Hismotherhookedhisarmandfirmlysteeredhim
towardaquietalcove,awayfromtheroomsandnursingstation.“Iassumeyou’reheretosee
CarolineandIwanttotalktoyoufirst.”
“How’sshedoing?”
Hismotherlookedpasthisshoulder,ensuringnoonewaswithinearshot.“Thedoctorputheron
somekindofantianxietymedicine.Insistedonherseeinganotherpsychiatrist.”
Garrettfrowned.“Youthinkthat’swrong?”
“Garrett.”Hismotherrolledhereyes.“Depressionissuchabuzzwordforyourgeneration.
Everyonehastoughstretchesinlife.That’snoexcusetocurlupinabed—ortakedrugs.Ididn’traise
eitheryouoryoursistertobeweaklings.”
Hestruggledforpatience.He’drealizedyearsagothathismotherwasn’tascoldasshecame
across.She’djustfoughthardtolivethegoodlife—asshedefinedit—andfearedanythingthatwasa
threattothat.“Mom,”hetoneddownhisvoice,“depressionisn’tacharacterweakness.It’sanillness.
BeingmadatCarolineforthisislikebeingmadatsomeoneforgettingcancer.”
“Shedoesn’thavecancer.She’shealthyasahorse.She’sbeenthroughdozensoftests.Andthat’s
thepoint.Thereisnothingwrongwiththatgirl,nothingkeepingherinbedallthistime.Yourfather
andIareatourwits’end.”
Okay.Nowaytoopendoorsinthatdirection,sohetriedanother.“Hasanyonebeenabletoreach
Griffyet?”
“Oh,yes.Yourfatherfinallyconnectedwithhimlastnight—inthemiddleofthenight,infact.Our
embassy,theirembassy,onandon,ittookforever.Wedidn’tgethim,buthe’sbeenlocatednow.It
couldtakeaslongasaweekbeforehe’shome,butatleastweknowhe’scoming.”
“That’sgood—”
“Exactly.IdrovestraighttothehospitaltotellCarolinethatGriffwascominghome,thinkingthat
wouldfinallyperkherup.Insteadshestartedsobbing.Cryingsoloud,theyendeduphavingtosedate
her.”Finallysheloststeamonthatsubject,onlytostartupanother.“Garrett,Iwantyoutocometothe
clubonSaturdaynight.There’sadance.TheannualJunegala—”
“Thanks,Mom.ButI’dratherjoinachainganginSiberia.”There.Healmostwonasmile…butnot
quite.
“Nowdon’tbedifficult.Weneedyouthere.Weneedtostandtogetherasaunitedfamily.”
Hescratchedhischin.“HonesttoPete,whothehellcaresifwe’reaunitedfamily?”
“Everyone.Thisentirecommunitywillnoticeifwe’renotthere.Andthethingis,yoursisterwill
betheonetosufferifpeoplestarttothinkshe’smentally…unbalanced.”
“Somepeoplearegoingtojudgenomatterwhatwesayordo—butnobodyI’dwanttobearound.
AndnooneI’dwantCarolinearoundeither.SoIcan’timaginewhythatmatters.”
“Garrett,Iknowyoudon’tsharethesamevaluesthatyourfatherandIdo.Butyoursisterlovesthe
club.Shehassomanyfriendsthere.Whenshecomestohersenses,she’sgoingtowanttogoback,to
eventsjustlikethis.Sothisisforher,notforyou—”
“Allright,allright,I’llgo.”
Hismotherwasjuststartingtowindup,butnowshesquintedathiminsurprise.“You’llgo?”
“Yup.Justtellmewhattime.”
“It’sblack-tie,”hismotherwarnedhim.
Well,hellanddoublehell.Butsomewhereinthosemassiveclosetsinthemansion,Garrettknew
hismomhadsavedbothawhiteandablacktux.Itwasn’tasifhehadn’tbeenropedintothoseneck-
chokingfunctionsazilliontimesbefore.
Oncehismotherleft,hesatwithCarolineforanotherhour.Sheneverwokeupenoughtotalk,
apparentlybecauseofthefreshsedationthey’dgivenher.Butshesqueezedhishand…whichmadehis
heartclimbstraightintohisthroat.
Nomatterhowmuchtorturetheclubdancewas,hewasmorethanhappytoattend.Hearingthatthe
countryclubwasanestofCaroline’sfriendswastheimpetus.Someonetherewasgoingtoknow
something.He’daskedeveryoneelsehecouldthinkof,butobviouslyhedidn’tknowallher
acquaintancesbecausehehadn’thungoutinEastwickforyears.
Asheheadedbacktohisrentedapartment,frustrationandworryclimbedhismood.Sofarhe’d
completelyfailedthecourseinhelpinghissister.
Hewasn’tusedtofailure.Fordamnsure,hewasn’tusedtofeelinghelpless.Maybegettingsome
workdonewouldatleastclearhismind.Onlyhe’dbarelyparkedthecarandclimbedoutbeforehe
sawthenewcrisiswaitingforhim.
Thisparticularcrisiswaswearingasilver-blueT-shirtthatglovedherbreastslikeafaithfullover,
awhiteskirtthatlookedthinasahandkerchiefandaglistenofcarelesssapphiresinthebangleonher
wrist.
Oh,yeah.Andshehadeyessofterthanviolets.
Fortwodayshe’dalmost—almost—forgottenthat.
Five
Garrettknewhe’dseeEmmaagain—thatwasaguaranteeinEastwick—buthe’dcountedonsome
warning.Sometimetoprepare.Somespacetorememberthathewasamature,successfuladult
insteadofateenagerwiredonhormonesandlust.
Well,hedidhaveacoupleofseconds,becausehespottedherbeforeshespottedhim.
Shewasatthetopoftheoutsidebackstairs.He’dstartedusingthatbackentrancebecauseitwas
privateandhedidn’thavetogothroughhislandlady’shouse.ButwhyeverandwhateverEmmawas
doingthereinitiallyeludedhim.Whenheclimbedhalfwayupthestairs,hesawthatshe’dapparently
beenpilingboxesandsacksagainsthisbackdoor.Andthensheturned.
“Well,ifyouaren’tasightforsoreeyesafteramightylongday.Butwhatisallthis?”Hemotioned
totheboxes.
She’dheardhim.Heknewshe’dheardhim.Butforthatinstantwhentheireyesmet,shewenttotally
still,asifherhearthadstoppedbeating.Anddamnedifhisdidn’tstop,too.
Herfacelookedsun-kissed,hermouthbare,hereyessovulnerable.TheT-shirtmadeherbreasts
looksoftandroundandtouchable.Thepalesummerskirtlookedasifit’dstripofffast.Evocatively
fast.Seductivelyfast.Onelook,andallhecouldthinkaboutwasclaimingher.
“I…”Quicklyherexpressionchanged.Shesmiled,foundherpoiseagain.“It’sbeenbuggingme,
aboutyourbeingstuckcampingoutinthisbaldapartment.Ialwayshavesparethingssittingaround
thegallery.Andit’sJunerightnow,soI’mgettingreadyforaparticularlybigshowinJuly,which
meansI’mevenmorecrowded.SoIjustfiguredyoumightbeabletouseafewthingstomakethe
placemorecomfortable.”
Sheliftedsomeitemssohecouldseethenatureofthestuffshe’dbroughtover.ApairofWalter
Farndonprintsofsailboats—asifshecouldhaveknownhewasnutsforsailboats.Astonesculpture
inlapis.Abrightwovenmola.Acouplegiant-sizebluebathtowels.Awovenbasketwithsomebasic
kitchenware—afewwhiteplates,whitebowls,silverware,mugswithbullsandelephantsonthem.
Someoftheitemswereundoubtedlyfromhergallery.Butnotall.
Helookedather.
Emmararelyshowednerves,yetshesuddenlytuggedonanearring.“Youdon’thavetotakea
thing.Ifsomething’snottoyourtaste,don’tsweatitinanyway….”
Hekeptlookingather.
“ButI’mjusttwodoorsdown,soitwaskindofsillynottoofferyoutheuseofsomethingsthat
mightperkuptheplace,makeyoufeelmorecomfortableawayfromhome…”
Hekeptlookingather.
Andfinallythepuffseemedtogooutofhersails.Shesankdownonthetopstep,whichleftjust
enoughroomforhimtohunkerdownnexttoher.Theairwashumidenoughtowear.Eventhough
therainhadfinallystopped,leavesandbrancheshungheavywithmoisture,dripping,catchingthe
late-afternoonsunlight.Apairofrowdypeonybushesclusteredunderthefence,untendedandoutof
control,yetthescentoftheflowerswaftedup,sodelicatethey’dcatchyourbreath.
Orelse,shewastheonecatchinghisbreath.
“Thiswasreallyniceofyou,”hesaidquietly.“Butyoudidn’ttaketimeoutofaworkdayjustto
makethisapartmentmorelivable.”
Shehesitated,thenliftedherhandsinahumorousgestureofdefeat.“Darnit,Icanfibtomost
peoplewithoutgettingcaught.Howcomeyou’resohardtofool?Butyou’reright.Iadmitit.Ineeded
todothis.”
“Youneededtodoexactlywhat?Bringthisstuff?”Hemotioned.“Whichreallyisappreciatedby
theway.I’vebeencampingoutwithnoproblem.Butdamn,itisprettybaldinthere.”
Shenodded.“Honestly,Ithoughtafewadditionswouldhelp.Butthatwasjustmyexcusefor
comingover.ThetruthisthatIneededtoseeyou.”
“Needed.”Herepeatedtheword,unsurewhyshe’dchosenitorwhatitmeant.
Shepulledupherknees,tuggedherskirtdown,tuckedastrandofhairbehindherears.And
suddenlyshenolongerlookedlikethecoollyelegant,poisedgalleryowner,butthepredebutantegirl
he’doncebeensoheadoverheelsfor.
“It’sbeenonmymind.ThewayIranofftheotherday,”sheadmitted.“Darnit,Ihaven’tdone
anythingthatcowardlysinceIcanremember.”
Hewasn’tgoingtohauloffandkissher.Maybehecouldn’tstopthinkingaboutit,butthatdidn’t
meanhewasgoingtodoit.“That’sfunny.Ididn’tseeanythingthatlookedlikecowardice.WhatIsaw
wasawomanwhoseemedprettyshookup.Butthen,sowasI.Lady,canyoueverkiss.”
Hercheekssuddenlybloomedwithcolorbrighterthanallthosepeonies.“Well,thatwasexactlythe
problem.NothowIkissed.Buthowyoukissed,buster.”
“Yeah,Ilikeyourversionofthestorybetter.It’sjusttootoughonmymaleegotoadmitthata
womanknockedmysocksoff,especiallywithnothingmorethanafewkisses.Mucheasierto
swallowthatmyexpertiseandsexappealthrewyou.Although,Ihavetosay,I’veneverscareda
womanintogallopingoutofsightatthespeedofsoundbefore.”
Asoundescapedherthroat.Atickleofachuckle.“Quitit.You’remakingmefeelbetter.AndI
knowperfectlywellIbehavedlikeagoose.”
“Youknowwhat?I’malmostpositivewecanbothsurviveanawkwardmoment.”
“Iknowwecan.We’renotkidsanymore.It’sjust…itwouldhavebeenawkward.”Sheliftedahand
inauniversallyfemalegesture.“SoIwanteditoutintheopen.AchancetosayI’msorrythat
happened,itwon’thappenagain.Soyouwouldn’thavetoworryaboutrunningintomeagain,either.”
“Okay.Gotthatoffbothourchests,”hesaid.
“Right.”
“Neitherofusisworriedaboutitanymore,”hesaid.
“Right.”
Andcatsdanced,hethought.Hispulsewaspoundinglikealonesomestallionneartheprettiestfilly.
Hewasn’taniceman.Heknewthat.Beingnicehadneverbeenonhismost-wanted-attributeslist,but
allthesame,hewasusuallyamoredecentguythanthis.Theproblemwassittingsoclosetoher.
Seeingthelatesunlightcatchinthelittleswoopofhairthatbrushedherforehead.Seeingherarms
wrappedaroundherkneeslikeagirl’s.Seeingthosesensualviolet-blueeyestryingsohard—too
hard—nottolookathim.
“Tellmeaboutthisguyyou’reengagedto,”hesaid.
“Reed?ReedKelly—youknow,RosedaleFarms.”
“Yeah,ofcourse.Hewasaheadofmebyayearinschool.ButIjustdidn’tknowhimwell.Seemed
likeagoodguy.”
“Heis.Couldn’tbebetter.He’sgotabig,wonderful,gregariousfamily.He’sterrificwithkids,with
horses.He’skind.Patient…”
“How’dyougettogether?”
Shechuckled,butitwasn’tahumoroussound.Suddenlyshewaspullingatherearlobeagain.“My
parentshavebeenonmycasetomarryforyears.Producegrandchildren.Youknowhowthatgoes—”
“Yeah,Ido.”
“AndIwassosickofbeingtheextrawomanatdinnerpartiesandgatherings.Feltlikemeatbeing
paradedinfrontofbutchersforthemtochoosetheprimecut.Eastwickcanbewonderful,butit’snot
easytobesingleinthistown.AndReedwasgettingitfromtheotherend—hewastheextraman
everytimeahostessneededone.HateditasmuchasIdid.Andthenatadinnerparty,wefound
ourselvestogether—thetokensingles.Itwasfunny,really.Westartedgoingtodifferentfunctionsjust
tosaveourselvesbeingsetup.”
“Andyoufoundyouclicked.”
“Idon’tknowaboutclicked.Buthewassoeasytobewith.”
“Easytobewith,”Garrettechoedandstood.Hugeholesseemedmissinginthispicture.Forone
thing,hecouldn’tfathomhowawomanaswarmandvibrantasEmmahadn’tbeentemptedby
marriagelongbeforethis.Andgranted,hewouldhavebeenprejudicedagainstherfiancéifshe’d
claimedKellywasaherotentimesover.Buteasytobewith?Whatkindofadefinitionfora
relationshipwasthat?
Emmaimmediatelystood,too,asifrealizinghowlongthey’dbeentalking.“I’llhelpyoutakethis
allinifyou’dlike.ButthenI’dbetterbegettingbacktothegallery—”
Hesnaggedherwrist.Justlightly.Justtoseewhattouchingherdid—toher,tohim.Allheactually
didwaswraphisfingersaroundherwrist,histhumbonherpulse,forafewbareseconds.Yetthat
instantlyhereyesshottohislikealightbeam.Thepulsecaughtinherthroatwherehecouldseeit,
beating,beating.Herlipssuddenlyparted.
“Hesoundslikeasaint,Emma,”Garrettsaid.
“Notasaint.Butareallygoodman—”
“Yeah.Soyoukeepsaying.AndIbelieveyou.Butifyoudon’tlovehim,whyareyoumarrying
him?”
Shedidn’tanswerhim.Maybeshecouldn’tanswerhim.Thatclose,shelookedathismouth,athis
eyes.Shedidn’tmoveawayortrytoevadehistouch.Amourningdovecalledfromsomewhereinthe
yard.
Thescentofpeoniesagaindrifteduponthehot,humidbreeze,soteasing,soevocative.
Itwasallhecoulddonottokissher—partlybecausethat’showshelookedathim,asifitwereall
shecoulddonottokisshim.
Factskeptflashinginhismind:thatshewasengaged,thathewasn’tapoacher.Butevenwhenthey
werekidshe’dneverfeltatugthisstrong.Atthevastageofthirty-five,itseemedcrazytodiscover
therewasahugeneedinsidehim,aneedfromtheheart,anunbearableholeoflonelinessthathe
hadn’tevenknownhewassufferingfrom,aholethatonlyshecouldfeelorfill.
“Don’t,Garrett,”shewhisperedsoftly,aplea.
Heheardthetremorinhervoice.Immediatelyhereleasedherwristandsteppedback.“Ididn’t
scareyou,didI?Iwouldn’thurtyoufortheworld,Emma—”
“Ineverthoughtyouwould.”
“ButIwon’tlie.Idowantyou.”
“Damn,youwerealwayshopelesslyhonest.Butdidn’tanyoneevertellyouthatyoudon’thaveto
bequitethisblunt?”
Sheobviouslywantedhimtosmile,wantedtosaysomethingthatwouldeasethetensionbetween
them.Justthen,though,hecouldn’tseemtoconjureupasmile,evenforher.Insteadhetouchedher
cheekwiththebackofhishand,justthemildest—nakedest—ofcaresses.“Maybeyoudon’tfeelthe
samethingI’mfeeling.”
Shesuckedinabreath.“Ifeelit.”
“Doyoufeelitwithhim,too,then?Whenyou’remakinglovewithhim?”Hereallyhadtriedto
drillsomeoftheblunthonestyfromhischaracter,andGodknowshedidn’twanttomakeEmma
uncomfortable.Buthehadtoask.Hejustcouldn’timaginelovingsomeoneandfeelingthisfor
someoneelse.Sure,youcouldbeattractedtomorethanoneperson.Butthisyankonhisheartasif
he’ddieifhecouldn’thaveher,no.Hecouldn’timagineanotherwomaninhislifeifhecouldhave
whathewasfeelingrightnowforEmma.
Sheshiftedhergazeawayfromhis.“Idon’texactlyknow,Garrett.ReedandIhaven’t…gottenthat
close.”
“Pardon?”Hemusthavemisheardher.SheandReedwereengaged.Howcouldtheynothaveslept
together?
Shesighedheavilyandnoisily,glancedupattheskyasifbeggingforstrengthandthenaimed
straightforthestairs.Asifthey’dbeendiscussingtheweather,shesaidcheerfully,“IfIfindmore
goodiesinthegalleryIcanspare,I’llbringthemover.AndifanythingIbroughtisinyourwayor
youdon’tlikeit,justgiveashoutandI’llcomegetit.”
Heleanedovertherailing,watchingherslimfannyswishassheclimbeddownthestairs.“Does
thatmeanyou’renottooannoyedwithmeforaskingafewawkwardquestions?”
“OfcourseI’mannoyed.You’rebeingaroyalpain.Unsettlingandupsetting.”Sheglancedbackat
himonemoretime.“Nodifferentthanyoualwayswere.ButthankGodI’mnotseventeenanymore.”
“Damnstraight.You’reahellofalotmorebeautiful.Andmoreconfounding.”
“Andyoualwaysdidlikeputtingyourhandinthefire.Butwe’regoingtogetalongfamously
whileyou’reintown,”sheinformedhimcheerfully.“Partlybecausewe’retwodoorsdownfrom
eachother.AndbecauseIcareaboutyoursisterandwanttohelpwithCarolineifIcan.Andpartly
becauseyouweremyfirstlove,whichIreallydon’twanttoforget—eventhoughyou’rebeingbad.
Badtothebone.Badallthewaydowntothe—”
“Igetthepicture.”
“SothepointisthatI’mnotgoingtoletalittleawkwardnessmakeitimpossibletobetogethernow
andthen.”
“Betogether…howexactlydoyoumeanthat?”
Sheflippedhimthefinger.Emma.EmmaDearborn.EmmaD—thesilk-and-pearlsdebutanteof
Eastwick,thenever-do-anything-wrong-in-public,never-offend-anyoneEmma.Flippedhimthe
finger.
Hewasdownrightcharmed.Andcaptivated.
“Damn,you’refun,”hesaid.
“Iamnot.”
Hechuckled.“Yeah,youare.AndImayjusthavetomakeanotherpassatyou,Em.”
“YoutryitandI’llhavetoslapyousilly,”shewarnedhim…andthenseemedtorealizeshewas
callingoutthatinformationtotheentireneighborhood.Heheardhersigh.Again.Andthenfinally
shedisappearedfromhissight.
Hehungovertheporchrailafterthatforawhile,though.Hecouldfeelthesillygrinonhisface,
when,hell,hedidn’tdogrins.Cometothinkofit,hehadn’tsmiledinalongtime.
Hewaitedfortheguilttohithimagain.Andofcourse,itdid.Itwasn’tcomfortableorright,this
huge,buildingthinghefeltforawomanwhowastaken,eventhoughshesoundedlesstakenthanhe’d
originallybelieved.
Garretttoldhimselftobackoff.Butwhenhepivotedaroundandheadedintohisapartment,he
couldn’tswearthathewasgoingtoobeythatinnerconscience.
Hecouldn’tsweartoanything.NotwhereEmmawasconcerned.
Exceptthathewishedhehadn’tbeencrazyenoughtoloseherthefirsttime.
Emmatwistedandturneduntilshecouldseethemiddleofherbackinthebathroommirrorat
Color.Thereitwas.Thereasonfortheitchthathadbeendrivinghercrazyonandofffordaysnow.
Abrandnewhive.
Justone,butnowshehadafreshexcuseforbeinganervouswreck.Sure,thatlastconversation
withGarretthadpreyedonhermindlikeacatonamouse.She’dbeenmakinglovewithGarrettin
herdreams.She’dbeendrivingintrafficandsuddenlyfeelingherselfflushwhenthoughtsofhim
swamtothesurface.She’dbeendressinginthemorning,pickingoutslipsofsatinandlaceand
suddenlythinkingoftakingthemoff.ForGarrett.WithGarrett.
Butnowatleastshecouldclaimaphysicalreasonforfeelingasifshe’dlostcontrolofherlife.
Impatientlyshescratchedthesucker-hiveonherback,washedherhandsandhikeddownthehall.The
countryclubJunedancewascominguptomorrow.She’dbeenthinkingofitasD-night.Reedhadhad
hishandsfullallweek.Tomorrowshesimplyhadtofindawaytocornerhimalone,tosaythethings
she’dfailedtothelasttime.
Andrightnowwhatsheneededwaswork.Mind-numbingplainoldhardwork.
Inoneofthefirst-floordisplayrooms,Emmawasfinishingupanexhibit.ThroughJuly,shewas
callingittheRedRoom.She’dcombinedtexturesandtextileswithonlythecolorincommon.A
headdressfromCameroonwasjuxtaposedwithamarblesculptureofayoungwomancoveredin
rosepetals.ASchweitzerlinenwallhangingcontrastedwithanAfghanirug.Aperfectlyghastlylamp
fromthe1950s—withawoman’sleginfishnetstockingsforabase—echoedtheshockandsensuality
ofaglobepaintedwiththeglossyredpaintusedbyJaguar.
Thewallhangingwasn’tright,though,soshetookitdownandtriedagain.Nomatterhowhardshe
concentrated,aquestionkeptstainingthebackofhermind.ExactlywhatdidsheoweReed?
Shesteppedbackandknewimmediatelyshe’dhungittoohigh.
Howcouldshepossiblymakeamajorlifedecisionbasedonfeelingsforamanwho’donlybeen
backinherlifeforacoupleofweeks?Anddarnit,whydidGarretteverhavetocomebackintoher
life?She’dknowntherewereissuesinhermarriagewithReed.Butshemighthavebeenabletomake
Reedhappy—mighthavebeenabletosettleherself—ifGarretthadjustnevercomehome.
Shesteppedbackfromthelinenwallhangingandgrittedherteeth.Nowshe’dhungittoolow.
“Hey,Emma.”Joshpokedhisheadinthedoorway.Hewasworkinginthefrontwithagroupof
volunteerkids—they’dbattledoverwhogottodothatjobbecausetheybothlovedworkingwiththe
teenagers,butJoshhadwon.Thistime.“Yourmother ’sonthephoneintheoffice.”
“Thanks.”Couldthisdaygetmorefrustrating?Butitcould,shediscovered,whenshepickedupthe
phoneintheofficeandheardhermother ’sslurredvoice.
“Emma?”
“Mom.It’sonlythreeintheafternoon!”
“Couldn’thelp.”Emmaheardthechink-chinkoficecubes.“Yourfather…”Thephonedroppedor
somethingelsemadeaheavythump.“…somean.NothingIdoisright.Comehometonight?You
haveto.Ineedyou.”
Afterthatcheerycall,Emmareturnedtothewall-hangingproject,thinking,okay,okay,whatdid
sheoweherparents?Andhowcomeshecouldn’tseemtoescapeanyofthehairylifequestionstoday,
nomatterhowhardshetried?
Toaddinsulttoinjury,shestillhadn’tconqueredthewall-hangingproblembeforenoticinga
silvervanwithWeddingsByFelicityforalogo.Secondslateraplatinumblondeflewintotheroom,
wearingheelstootalltowalkonandashort,sassyhaircutthatmatchedhershort,sassyprintdress.
“Oh,good,you’renotbusy!”
Emmaglancedattheboxesheapedallovertheroom.“Felicity—”
Heroldfriendmotionedwithherheadtowardthedoor—sincebothherhandswerefilled,onewith
alongbottleofwine,theotherwithtwocrystalglasses.“YouandIaregoingtotalk.Rightnow.
Don’teventryarguingwithme.”
“I’mnotarguing.I’malwaysgladtoseeyou.But—”
“Uh-uh.Nobuts.Movethetush,cookie.We’redrinkingandtalkingbehindcloseddoorsforatleast
thenexthalfhour,andthat’sthat.”
FelicitylookedalotlikeayoungMegRyan,exceptthatMegusedtoplaysuchnicerolesin
movies,andFelicitysharedmoreinpersonalitywithanarmytank.ShesetupbehindEmma’s
steamed-cherrydesk,burrowedinherpurseforacorkscrewand,predictably,foundone.Shepoured
oneglasstothebrimandshovedpapersasidetopushittowardEmma.
“Ifyouweren’toneofmydearestfriends,I’dhavemoppedthefloorwithyoulongbeforethis.”
“Me?”ThesignoverEmma’sdesksaidOurLivesAreReflectedintheThingsWeChoose.Ironic,
shethought,becausethegallerywasbrimfulofeleganceandstyleinallforms,yetherofficewalls
werewallpaperedwithchildren’swork.Fingerpainting.Shaving-creamart.Picturesmadefrom
macaroniandspanglesandbeadsandbuttons.Ofcourse,nooneeverhungoutinthegalleryoffice
buther.Andbossy,nosy,intrusivefriends,itseemed.
“Look,”Felicitysaidfirmly.“IknowthatReed’salreadymadethehoneymoonplans.Whichmeans
youbothhavetoknowwhenthewedding’sgoingtobe,yetsomehowyoustillaren’tcallingmeto
pindownthedate.”
“Iknow.AndI’msorry.It’swrong….”Shelookeddownatthewineglass.“Felicity,honestly,Ican’t
drinkinthemiddleoftheday.”
“Ofcourseyoucan.Becauseweneedtotalk,andrightnowyou’rewaytoobuttoned-up.Nowlisten
tome.”Felicityleveledherselfintothewraparoundredvelvetchairandcockedherverylongleg
withitsverytallheelonEmma’spricelessdesk.“I’vebeenthroughthisamilliontimes.Iknowbrides
likenooneknowsbrides.Bridesgetcoldfeet.It’snothingnew,nothingtobeashamedof.Infact,
you’relikelytogetcolderfeetthanmost.”
“Whydoyouthinkthat?ThatI’dgetcolderfeetthanmost?”
“Becauseyou’rethekindtotakemarriagemoreseriouslythantherestofus,”Felicitysaidasif
thatshouldhavebeenobvious.“Admitit.Youthinkmarriageisforkeeps,don’tyou?”
“Well,yes.”
“Irestmycase.You’rehopelesslynaive.Butthat’snotthepoint,Em.Thepointisthatnerveslike
yoursarewhyWeddingsByFelicityexists.SoIcantakethestressoffyourback.Andbecausethis
one’saboutyou,andIloveyou,Idon’tcareifitallhastobedoneatthelastminute.I’llmakeit
happen.It’salsoaloteasiertomakeithappenbecauseit’satyourmom’splace.Andwhenthere’sno
limitonmoney,obviouslythat’samajorhelp,aswell.”Felicitydownedanothersipofwine.
“Although,Ihavetosay,yourmotherisdrivingmebatty.Shewantseverythingherway.”
Emmawaslistening.Itwasjust…Allright,shewasn’tlistening.Shehadn’tbeenlisteningtoanyone
oranythingindaysnow.EversincethatafternoonwithGarrett,sheseemedtohavesuffereda
completebrainmeltdown.Shejustcouldn’tseemtostopreplayingthosemoments.Whenhe’dtugged
herwristandthey’dbeeninchesapart.Whendesirehadriseninherlikeafiercewildfire.She’d
wantedtobekissedatthatmomentmorethanshe’dwantedlifeorair.Wantedtokisshim.Wantedto
bekissedbyhim.There’dbeennothingelseinherhead,herheart,nothing.Itwaslikebeing
swooshedunderbyatidalwave.
AtidalwavenamedGarrett.
Anddamnit,itwasonethingtosettlewhenyouthoughtpalewasalltherewas.Butnowsheknew
shehadn’tcomeclosetothepossibilitiesbefore.
“Hey.”Felicitysnappedherfingers.“Wakeup,you.Remember,I’mtheonewhopaidforthegreat
wine?”
“Yes.Andthatwasreallyniceofyou.AndI’msorrymymother ’sbeingapain.”
Felicitywavedahand.“Brides’momsandgrooms’momscomewiththeterritory.It’slikehaving
toeatyourspinachwhenyou’reakid.Icandealwithit.AndIcandealwithyournerves,too,ifyou’ll
justletme.SoeitherstarttalkingtomeorI’llhavetoslapyou.”
Emmaunderstoodshewassupposedtolaugh.Butsomehowwhatcameoutofhermouthwasa
question.“DoyouthinkI’macoldfish?”
“Huh?Iwastalkingaboutcoldfeet,asinbeingnervous.Notcoldfish,asinbeingfrigid.”
“ButdoyouthinkIam?Imean…doIcomeacrossasless…sexual…thantherestofthegroup?”
“Oh,boy,thisisgettinggood.”Felicitydippedthewinebottleintoherglassagain,thensquirmed
herfannybackinthechair.“Honey,noonewegrewupwithislikelytowearawhitedressather
wedding,ifyouknowwhatImean.Although…”ShesuddenlysquintedatEmma.“Holyhorseradish.
Youcouldn’tstillbeavirgin,couldyou?Ididn’tthinkitwaspossible.”
“Atmyage?Comeon,”Emmascoffedandforthefirsttimereachedforherwineglassandtooka
gulp.
“Youcouldn’tbe,”Felicityrepeated,butshewasstillsquintingather.Squintinghard.
“I’mnot.I’mnot.”
“Well…”FinallyFelicityletitgo.“Let’sgobacktotheoriginalquestion.Whatwasthecold-fish
remarkallabout?”
Emmacouldn’tsit.Shewalkedovertothewindow,rubbedheritchybackagainsttheframe.“There
arealotofreasons…whyI’mnolongersureI’mtherightpersonforReed,”shesaidquietly.
“Okay.Sinceyouboughtupthecold-fishthing,Iassumesexistherealissuewe’renottalking
about,right?Andifthat’sallyou’reworriedabout,chill.”Felicityrelaxedagain,asifrelievedto
discovernothingimportantwastheproblem.“Comeon,youknowit’sthesameforeveryone.Sexis
alwaysgreatinthebeginning.Thenthefirstlustfadeslikethebloomontherose.Thenthecouple
bothhavetoworkatit—andgoodloversdojustthat,sotheytendtoendupjustfine.Youknowhow
itgoes.”
“Yes,ofcourseIdo,”Emmasaidandthistimefilledthewineglassherself,keepingherexpression
averted.
“Mytheory,though,isthatifitisn’tgreatinthebeginning,thentherelationshipjustisn’tworth
goingfor.Imean,aguywho’sselfishfromtheget-goneverimproves.That’snotaboutsex,it’s
aboutacharacterflaw,youknow?”Felicitysuddenlylookedstartled.“Reedisn’tthatkindofselfish,
ishe?Imean,Ibarelyknowhim.Butheseemslikesuch—”
Joshsuddenlyrappedontheopendoor.Herarelyinterruptedwhenshehadsomeoneintheoffice
—partlybecauseherarelyneededto.Hewasmorethancapableofhandlingmostproblemshimself,
butthistimeheclompedinwithafrown,droppedsomethinginherhandandclosedherfingers
aroundit.“Yougottaquitputtingthatinthebathroom.I’mscaredit’sgoingdownthedrain,”hesaid
andthenclompedrightbackoutoftheroomagain.
Emmaknewwhatitwaswithoutlooking…butshedidlook.There,inherpalm,wasthe
breathtakingsapphireReedhadgivenher.
Shejustcouldn’tseemtokeeptheengagementringonherfingerlately.Couldn’teventryto
pretend.
Felicitydidn’tseemtonoticetheexchange,justkeptonchatting.Eventuallyshestooduptoleave—
althoughnotuntilthebottlewasnearlyleveled.Shecarriedthetwocrystalglassesandthecorkscrew
asfarasthedoorway,butthenstalledthere,clearlyinnohurrytoleave…notoncetheystartedon
everyoneelse’sgossip.
“DidyouhearthepolicetalkedtoAbbyagain?Apparentlyshegotthemtotakefingerprintsofher
mother ’ssafe—andtheyfoundathumbandforefinger—andtheprintsweren’tofanyfamily
members!Sothey’requestioningEdithCarteragain.Youknow,Bunny’shousekeeper—”
“Ijustdon’tgetit,”Emmasaid,closingherhandsaroundtheringagain,feelingthestonepinch.
“Whenitcomesdowntoit,Abby’smomonlytoldabunchofgossip.Sure,peoplewouldn’twantitin
printiftheywerediscoveredsleepinginthewrongbed.Buttokillher?”
“Iknow,Iknow.ButthenifsomeonehadthecojonestoblackmailJackCartwright,youhaveto
believesomepeoplegetprettyshookupovertheirsecretsbeingtold.”
“Yeah,”Emmasaidthoughtfully,againfeelingtheweightandshapeofthesapphireinherpalm.
“Andanothersecretthing…IranintoMaryDuvallagain.Iknowyouusedtobegoodfriendswith
her.”
“Yeah,wewerereallyclosebackinhighschool.”
“Ithinkshe’sgreat.Butshejustlookssodifferentthanwhenwewereinschool.Suddenlyturned
intoaPendleton-and-pearlstype.Nomorewildcookie.Ithinkthere’sanothermysterythere.”
“Maybeshejustgrewup,”Emmasaiddrily.
“Andmaybeshehasadeep,darksecretthatmadeherwanttocomehideoutathomeagain…Hey,I
heardmaybetheyweregoingtoletCarolineoutofthehospitalinanotherdayortwo.Maybe,
anyway.Youhaven’theardwhathersecretis,haveyou?”
“No.”
“Well,ithastobesomethingbig.Agirldoesn’tswallowabucketofpillsifshe’sgotnothing
goingonbehindlockeddoors.God,thistown.Bigmoneymakesforbigsecrets,eh?”
WhenFelicityfinallyleft,Emmasettheengagementringonherdeskandletoutasighsofterthan
asouthernwind.Herfamilyhadsecrets,too.Butrightnowherownprivateheartacheofasecret
weighedsoheavilyonherconsciencethatshecouldbarelythink.
Therewasgoingtobehelltopayifsheduckedoutofamarriagethisfaralongintheplanning
stages.ButthemoresheworriedaboutwhatsheowedReed—andwhatsheowedherparents—the
moresheslowlyrealizedthatinherentirelifeshe’dneveraskedthebuffalosideofthatnickel
question.
Wasn’ttheresomepointinawoman’slifewhenshegottoask,whatdidsheoweherself?
Six
Garretthurriedthroughthehospitaldoors,pastdesks,pastpeople,pastcarts,pastanythingand
everything.Becausetheelevatorwastooslow,hetookthestairs.Hestumbledonthetopstep.Hell,a
mancouldhardlyrunintheslick-soleddressshoeshewasstuckwearingwithatux.
Histiestillwasn’ttied—henevercoulddotuxties.Buthe’dbeendressedandgrabbingthecarkeys
todrivetotheEastwickCountryClubdancewhenhegotthecallfromthehospital.
Attheheadnurse’sdeskhebarked,“Whereisshe?”
Hissister ’sroomhadbeenchanged.Shewasn’tbackinCriticalCare,thankGod,butthey’dmoved
hertothesmallpsychiatricunit,wheretheycouldkeephermonitoredfull-time.Caroline’srecovery
hadseemedonaclearupswinguntilaneventthatafternoon,whenthedoctorfearedshewasasuicide
riskagain.
Justoutsideherroomheslowedhisstepsohedidn’tbarrelintherelikeanoisyelephant.Buthis
stomachtightenedwhenhesawhissister.Shewaslyingonthebed,allcurleduplikeawoundedbaby,
facingthewall.StrapsonherwristspreventedherfromremovingtheIVsorgettinguponherown.
Thesamethoughtkeptechoinginhismind—thathewishedEmmawerewithhim.She’dknowwhat
tosay,whattodo.Heknewhowtowork,howtomakemoneybutnothowtodealwithpeople.He
neverhad.
Hissistermusthavesensedhispresence,becauseshesuddenlyturnedherhead.“Hey,bigbrother,”
shemurmured.
“Heyback.”
Shenoticedhistux.“Whew.You’relookingsohotthatIwanttowhistle,butmythroatseemstobe
mightydry.Theygavemesomethingawfullystrong.”Shewasn’tcompletelylucid.Hereyeskept
sluggishlyopeningandclosing.“Youalldresseduptotakemeoutforanightonthetown?”
“I’dtakeyououtintwosecondsifyou’dgo.”Heyankedachaircloser,parkedonit.“Whophoned
you,Caro?”
“Whatdoyoumean?”
“YouknowexactlywhatImean.Youweredoingfine.Weallthoughtyouwerecominghomein
anotherdayorso.Thenthenursesaidyougotacallthisafternoon—”
“Thatdaynurseissuchatattletale.”
Garrettignoredthat.“Andthenextthing,shefoundyouinthebathroomwithapieceofbroken
glassinyourhand.”
“Itwasanaccident.Ibrokethewaterglass—”
“Quitit,Caro.Itwasn’tanaccident.Whocalledyou?”herepeated,andwhenshedidn’tanswerhe
said,“Iknowitwasalocalcall,soithadtobesomeonefromEastwick.WhatinGod’snameisgoing
onthat’sgotyousoterrorized?Tellme.”
Shesmiled.“Aw,Garrett,youwerealwaysmywhiteknight.YoualwaysgotbetweenmeandDad
whenIwasintrouble.Orbetweenmeandawrongdate.”Sheclosedhereyes.“Doyouremember
whenIhadasleepoverthatonetime?Thinkwewerealltwelve.RaidedtheliquorcabinetafterMom
andDadwenttobed,allgotdrunkasskunks,thendecidedtogoswimming.Thenyoushowedup,
remember?”
“Iremember.Allsixgirlshurledalloverme,asIrecall.Notcountingthemessesalloverthe
house.”
“Butyousavedusall,Garrett.”Shesmiledathimagain.“You’vegoteverybodyfooledthatyou’re
acoldheartedworkaholic.Throughthickandthin,Icouldalwayscountonyou.You’retheonlyone
inthewholefamilywithintegrity.Realintegrity.”
“Obviouslythey’regivingyousomekindofhallucinatorydrug.Andallthisbeingniceisn’t
gettingyouoffthehook.It’stimeyoutoldmewhat’sgoingon.”
“What’sgoingon,”shesaidthickly,slowly,“isthatImadeamistakeIcan’tlivewith.”
AgainhewisheddesperatelythatEmmawashere.Emmawasn’tjudgmentalandshehadawayof
calmingpeopledown,makingthembelievethingswouldbeallright.Insteadhissisterwasstuckwith
justhim.“There’snomistakeyoucan’tlivewith,Caroline.NothingIcouldn’tforgiveyoufor.
NothingIwouldn’thelpyougetthrough.ButIcan’tprovethattoyouifyouwon’ttalktome.”
“Youwanttohelp?ThengetthehospitaltoreleasemesoIcangohome,”shesaid.
Yeah,sure.Andhavehergetanothercallathomefromthepersonwho’dbeenterrorizingher?
Hell,hedidn’tknowwhattodo.Butwhenhissisterfellasleep,hestumbledoutofthehospitaland
aimedstraightforthecountryclub.
Hewasn’tremotelyinapartymood,butthissummershindigwasoneoftheyear ’sbiggestgalas.
SomeonethereknewwhatwasgoingonwithCaroline.Theyhadto.AndEmmamighthavesome
ideasaboutwhotoquestionthathehadn’tthoughtof.
Fromahalfmileawayhestartedseeingthelights.Theplacewaslituplikeaminiaturegalaxy.The
multipleFrenchdoorsoftheformalballroomgapedopenontothepatio.Peopleweredancingboth
insideandout.Fountainssparkledwithrainbow-huedwater.Formallyattiredwaiterscarriedsterling
trays.Theguyswereallintuxes,butthewomenworeeverycolorintheuniverse—bridalwhitesand
sassyreds,sea-greensandshimmeryyellows,theglitternearlyblindingevenfromthedistance
whereheparked.Jewelstwinkledandshimmeredoneveryneck,everyear,everywrist.
Garrettwalkedaroundtothebackentrance,awayfromthecrush,hopingtoslipintothecrowd
withoutbeingnoticed.Intheolddays,theclubwouldhavehiredanorchestra.Thesedays,club
memberstoleratedatraditionalwaltznowandthen,buttheyalsowantedspicefortheirmoney—rock
androll,fandangos,musicwithabeatandsomesextoit.Still,sometraditionsneverchanged.
Flowersspilledoverontowrists,inwomen’shair,scentingthecentersofthetables.
Hesuddenlyhesitated.Hewasn’tafraidofsuchgatherings.
He’dgrownupinthisechelonofEastwicksociety.He’dratherbeworkingthanstuckmakingsmall
talk,butthatwasn’twhatsuddenlymadehimpause.
Fromadistance,thescenelookedlikeadream,withbeautifulpeoplelaughing,dancing,enjoying
eachother.Thatwaswhatithadalwaysbeenabout,Garrettsuddenlyrealized.Belonging.People
didn’thungertojointhecountryclubfortheprestigeofit.
Theyhungeredtobelong.Tosomething.Tosomeone.
Whenpushcametoshove,hefiguredthathadtobethecoreofhissister ’sproblem.Hedidn’t
knowthehow,thewhen,whyorwho.ButtheonlythreatworththekindofdespairCarolinewas
enduringhadtoemanatefromthatkindofsource—thethreatoflosingsomeonewhomattered.
Ormaybehewasimposinghisownhungertobelongonhissis’ssituation,hethoughtwryly.Until
comingbackhome—untilmeetingupwithEmmaagain—he’dneverthoughtofhimselfaslonely.
He’dneverthoughtheneededanyone.Yetnowthatdesiretobewithher,tobelongwithher,wasas
fierceas—
Andthenhesawher.Emmawasweavingthroughthedancers,thenpastthemandoutside,pastthe
spilloflightsandmusiconthepatio.She’dsurelyhaveseenhim—hewasjuststandinginthetree
shadowsbythewalk—ifshehadn’tbeensoobviouslyintent.Sheheadedstraightfortheblackiron
gatesoftheclubpool.
Thepoolwasclosedforswimmingtonight,buttheunderwaterlightshadbeenleftonfor
atmosphere.HewatchedEmmaunlatchthegate,stepinsideandoutofsightofthepartyers.Hergown
lookedluminescentintheaquamarinelight.ThestylemadehimthinkofaRomantoga,nothing
fancy,justaswathofsapphire-bluefabricthatdrapedoveroneshoulderandfelltoherankles.Slim
goldropestwistedaroundherwaistandunderthebodice.
Thesimplicityandclassinessofthegownsuitedherperfectly.
Shelikedherjewels—whatwomandidn’t?—yetshewaswearingnonetonight,unlikealltheother
womenthere.Herbarethroatgleamed,herskinitsownadornment.Hereyeshadmoreshineand
emotionthananygem.Hisheartsurgedjusttoseeher,justforthechanceofbeingnearher.
Butshewasn’talone.
ShewastalkingtotheonemanGarrettkeptconvenientlytryingtoforget.Herfiancé.Anditlooked
asiftheywerehavingadamnseriousprivatetalk,becauseReedKellyhadthepostureofamanwho
wasfuriousenoughtosnap.
Emmathoughtshe’dgooutofhermind.Naturallyshecouldn’ttalkseriouslytoReedinthemiddle
oftheclubdance,butshehadhopedtheycouldtakeoffhalfwaythroughtheevening,andthenshe’d
haveachancetotalkwithhimprivately.
Thatwashergoal,butshejustcouldn’tseemtomakeithappen.She’dbarelyseenReedfortwo
secondssincethey’darrived,muchlesshadaprayerofescaping.Beinginchargeoftheclub’sfund-
raisingcommitteedidn’thelp,becauseeveryoneandhismotherstoppedtochat.
Thesocialcrazinessstartedwhenfrail,slenderFrankForrestercorneredher.Frankhadbeenso
generoustotheclubandcommunitythatshecouldn’tavoidspeakingwithhim.Besides,hewasa
darling—althoughDelia,hiscurrentwife,wasquiteanexperience.Lotsofwomenvisitedaplastic
surgeonforonereasonoranother,butDelia’sboobsweresofaketheylookedlikemightyball
bearings.She’dgoneforatightsheathinaglitzylaméandcoveredeveryfingerinrings.Toeachhis
own,Emmaalwaysthought,butDeliawasso,sounlikethequietlygenerousFrank.
Afterthat,EmmahadtospendafewminuteswiththeDebsClub—allthegirlswerethere,with
eithertheirmatesorappropriaterailmeat.Felicity,ofcourse,keptshootinghermeaningfullooks,as
ifdeterminedtoremindheroftheirearlierconversation.AndthenMaryDuvallshowedup,covered
modestlyfromherthroattoherankles,veryquietlymakingherwaythroughthecrowd,lookingasif
sheneededafriendandsomeonetoreintroducehertoEastwickagain,soobviouslyEmmahadto
stepinthere.
AbbyTalbotswungherawayfromMaryforawhileafterthat.Gossipwasstillbuzzingabouther
mother ’sdeath—andwhowasgoingtotakeonwritingtheEastwickSocialDiary.Itwasthegossip
andmudslingingeveryonemissedmost.Abbywasusingthedanceasameanstoaskquestions.She
lookedgorgeous,asalways,buthermother ’sdeathseemedtohavechangedherfromaquiet,gently
understandingkindofwomanintoasteamroller.Shewantedanswers.
Andifshewantedjustice,shehadlostallfaithshewasgoingtogetitthroughthepolice
investigation.
Afterthat,EmmawascorralledbyJackandLilyCartwright.Emmahadgotteninvolvedinthe
EastwickCaresorganization—whereLilyhadbeenasocialworker—severalyearsbefore,sothey’d
becomefriends.HeavenknewEmmalovedworkingwiththeteenagers.Thistime,though,Lily
trackedherdown,lookingradiantandblooming,toaskifshehadanyfreetimethefollowingweek
foraspecialkids’project.
Emmasaidyes.Darnit,herschedulewastoopackedtoaddanymoretoit,butshe’dneverbeen
goodatsayingnotoanythinginvolvingkids,andbythenshe’dbeentoofrazzledtoeventry.
Reedfoundherandswirledherintoawaltz,butalmostimmediatelytheywereseparatedagain.
SomeoneclaimedReed’sattentionatthesametimeGarrett’sparentsdescendedonher.Barbaraand
MerrittKeatingwereusingeverypublicopportunitytosaythattheirdaughter,Caroline,wasallright.
She’djustaccidentallytaken“thewrongpill”andhad“achemicalreaction.”
“YouknowsomanypeopleinEastwick,Emma,”Barbarasaid.“Itwouldhelpsomuchifyou’d
helpsettherecordstraight.”
“Garrett’saroundheresomewhere,”hisfatherboomed.“He’lltelleveryone,too.We’revery
concernedaboutsomeofthehurtfulrumorswe’veheardspreadaboutCaroline.”
ImmediatelyEmmasearchedthecrowdforGarrettyetcouldn’tspothim.Hermothergrabbedher
armbeforeshehadanotherchancetoeventry.Hermomwasdressedinivory—herfavoritecolor—
andlookedslimandelegant.Onlytheslightestslurinherspeechwouldgiveanyonetheimpression
thatshe’dstartedpartyingmuchearlierthatday.Herdrinkingwasoneofthebest-keptsecretsin
Eastwick,buttonighthermomwasonahappybuzzforadifferentreason.
“IheardfromFelicitythatyouwerelikelygoingtoannouncetheweddingdateforsure.Like
tonight,dear?Iadmit,I’vebeenpassingalittlehintaroundourfriends….”
Emma’spulsepickedupafranticbeat.She’dmeanttotalktoReedtonight—butnowsheknewshe
hadtotalktohimimmediately,beforehermotherstartedspreadingtheweddinggossipevenfurther.
Allthesedutifulconversationshadbeennecessary,andtruthfullyshelovedallthesepeople,hadall
herlife.ButnowshehadtofindReedanddraghimtoaprivatespotsomewhere,somehow.
Shefoundhimtalkingtoawannabesenatorandsnaggedhiswrist.Hewashappytobedraggedoff,
butnotforthereasonsshehadinmind.Longbeforeshe’dgottenthemouttotheprivatespotbythe
pool,she’dknownthistalkwasgoingtobehard.Butshestartedoutsayinghonestly,“Reed,I’mnot
sureeitherofusreallywantsthismarriage,”andhejustdidn’tseemtobelieveher.
Hewentbacktofetchheradrink,apinotnoir—herfavorite—andthenwalkedaroundthepooltoa
spotwheretheywerecompletelycutofffromanyviewofthepartyers.Heseemeddeterminedto
believeshehadbridalnervesorthatshewasfussingoverthestressofputtingonthewedding.
Finally,though,heseemedtopickupthatthetearsinhereyesweren’tfromaminorcaseofstress.
“Allright,Emma.Justsayitstraight.Whatisallthisreallyabout?”
Shedesperatelywantedthatwinetosoothehernerves,yetsheputitdown,afraidshe’dchokeonit.
She’dneverdeliberately,willingly,hurtanyone.“Reed,youdon’treallywantme.Youhavetoknow
it.”
“Huh?OfcourseIwantyou.WhyonearthwouldIhaveaskedyoutobemywifeifIdidn’twant
youtobepartofmylife?”
Shepressedherhandtoherstomach.“Imeansex,Reed.Youdon’tfeelanybigattractionforme.”
Reedneverlosthistemper.HehadmorepatiencethanJob.Butshecouldseehewasstretchingto
keepittogetherbythen.“You’retheonewhodidn’twanttosleeptogetheruntilweweremarried.”
“Iknow.”
“Youfeltstronglyaboutit.Asyouputit,peoplesleeptogetherlikeit’sautomaticallyontheirtodo
listafterthey’vebeentogetherawhile,ratherthanitbeingsomethinguniqueorspecialforthetwoof
them.That’swhyyouwantedtodoittheold-fashionedway—waiting.Becauseyouwantedintimacy
tobesomethingmore.”
“IknowIsaidthat.AndImeantit.”
“Yousaidyouweretiredofcasualvalues.AndsoamI.AsfarasIknow,weweren’twaiting
becauseofnotwantingeachother.”
“Butyoudon’t,”shesaidquietly.“Wantme.”
“OfcourseIdo.ForPete’ssake,Emma.Thisisaridiculousconversation.You’reagorgeous
woman.Youcan’tpossiblybelievethatdesirewasn’tpartoftheequation.”
Shepersisted.“Ifyouwantedme—therightway,thewayI’dliketobewanted—youwouldn’thave
waited.Andit’sthesameforme.Iloveyou.You’reawonderful,wonderfulman.Andforalongtime
Ibelievedthatkindoflovewouldmakeagoodmarriage—”
“Butnowyousuddenlydon’t,”hesaidwithexasperation.
Shenodded.“Ithinkwe’d…manage.Butinthelongrun,Ithinkwe’dbothbemiserable.Lonely.
Thatwewouldneverhavethekindofmarriageyourparentshave,butmoremyparents’kindof
arrangement,becausethechemistryjustisn’tthere.”
Hefellsilent,lookingather,clearlyconsideringwhatshesaid.“Icouldarguewithyou,keep
tryingtotalk.ButIcanseeyourmind’smadeup.Youwanttocallitoff,”hesaid.
Shepulledthesapphireoffherfinger,offeredittohim.Whenhedidn’ttakeit,shegentlytuckedit
inhischestpocket.Buthestillwouldn’tlookatit.
“I’lltelleveryoneit’smyfault.Becauseitis,”shesaid.
Heimmediatelydismissedthatidea.“You’regoingtogetatonmorebacklashoutofthisthanI
will.I’lltaketheblame.Butrightnow…”Heshookhishead,thenspunaround.“RightnowIthinkI’ll
justtakeoff.Disappearforafewdays.Ifyoudon’tmind,Ireallydon’twanttotalktoyoufora
while.”
Hewalkedawayfromher,pastthepoolgate,yankingoffhistuxjacketasheheadedstraightforhis
car.
Emmacouldn’trememberthelasttimeshefeltlowerthanaskunk.
She’dneverhavechosentohurtasgoodafriend,asgoodaman,asReed.
Yetnomatterhowbadlyshefeltabouthurtinghim,deepinherheartshefeltthesteadybeatof
relief.Forthefirsttimeinmonthsshefeltasifshecouldbreathe.
Tomorrowthere’dundoubtedlybegossiphelltopaywhenEastwickcaughtwindofthebroken
engagement.Butforrightnowshewasfree—andthatincludedthefreedomtobeasupsetasshe
neededtobe.Shewhirledaround,thinkingthatsheneededtoreturntotheballroomtoretrieveher
bagandwrapbeforeshecouldgetoutofthere.Forjustaninstantshethoughtsheglimpsedthe
shadowofmovementintheshadytreesbeyondthewroughtirongate.Someonethere?
Whethertherewasortherewasn’t,sheheadedbackintotheballroom.Sheseemedtobeshaking
fromthetensionofthewholeemotionalscene.Shewantedtogohome—orbacktothegallery—as
quicklyasshecouldgetherthings.Escapewastheonlythingonhermind.
Atfour-thirtyinthemorning,Emmahadgivenuppretendingshecouldsleep.Sippingacupoftea,
shesatonthescreenedbackporchatthegallery,stilldressedinhereveninggownbutbarefootnow,
andwhentheeveningtemperaturehaddipped,she’dscaredupanoldsweaterfromtheshoptodrape
overhershoulders.
Shehadtolookprettyridiculous,buttherewasnoonearoundtosee.Thesunwasn’tdueupforat
leastanotherhour.Andalthoughlackofsleepwasundoubtedlygoingtocatchupwithher,shewas
tryingtobolstersomepeaceintohersystembeforefacingthedayahead.Sheknewitwasn’tgoingto
beeasy.
Beforeleavingthecountryclub,she’dcorneredhermothertoletherknowtheengagementwasoff
—itwastheonlywaytostophermomfromtalkinguptheweddingfortherestoftheevening.Bythe
timeEmmaarrivedbackatthegallery,though,herphonehadrungnonstop.
Hermotherhadcalledseveraltimes.ThenFelicityandotherfriends.
Thenherfather.
Evenbetweenphonecalls,she’dthrownup,whichstruckherasdarnnearfunny.Everyonein
Eastwickalwaysthoughtofherascalm,coolandcollected.ShewasthediplomatoftheDebs,notthe
instigator—thepeacemaker,nevertheconfronter.Andthis,ofcourse,waswhy.Whenevershehadto
doconfrontations,sheheaved.
Herstomachhadsettleddownhoursbefore,andshe’dturnedoffhercellphoneandallthe
landlinesinsideColor.Itwassolatethecricketsandfrogshadstoppedchirping.Solatethebaby
moonhadstarteddippinglowinthesky.Solatetherehadn’tbeenthesoundofacarpassinginhours.
Still,sheleanedherheadbackagainsttheroughporchwallandcouldn’tseemtofindanounceof
peace.
Inthedarknesssheheardthebackyardgatelatch,sawatall,darkshadow—andprobablyshould
haverespondedwithfear.Yetshedidn’t.
BythetimeGarrettclimbedthestepandrappedsoftlyonthescreendoor,shealreadyknewitwas
him.
Unlikeher,hewasdressedincomfortableoldchinosandashirt,thekindofclothessomeone
intelligentwouldwearatthistimeofthemorning.Butatthemomentshedidn’tfeelintelligent.She
feltvulnerableandshaken.Toovulnerabletowanttoseeamanwho’dcometomeanway,waytoo
muchtoher.
“Itoldmyselftoleaveyoualone,butIsawthelightinthegallerywhenIfirstgothome.Inever
sawitturnedoff.Startedworryingthatyouwerestillup,eventhislate.AndIcanseeyouare.”He
steppedin,quicklyclosedthescreenagainstmosquitoes.Butinsteadofapproachingher,hewentto
thefarsideofthescreenedporchandhunkereddownontheJapanesemat.“Seeme?I’mstayingon
theothersideoftheporch.Notcausinganytrouble.Notplanningto.But…Isawyou.Withyour
fiancé.Atthepool.”
“Ithoughtsomeonewasthere.”Herpulsestartedthatdancingthingagain,justfrombeingwith
him.“Therewasnoreasonforyoutoworryaboutme,Garrett.”
“WorryiswhatIdo.WhatgoodwoulditbetobeahardcaseobsessiveworkaholicifIdidn’tknow
howtoworryconstantly?Anditkeptbuggingme…Youhadtohavehadamightyroughnight.”
“Yeah,well…Ithinkawoman’ssupposedtohaveamiserablenightwhenshe’sbeenacreep.”
“Afteryouleft,thegossipswoopedovertheclublikeatidalwave.Thetalkwasthatthemarriage
wasoff.Butnoonehadacluewhocalledofftheengagement.Orwhy.Youtwoweresupposedtobe
theperfectcouple.”
“Theonewhocalleditoff—that’dbeme.Thecreepinthestory.”
“Feelingprettylow,areyou?”
“Ithurtslikethedevil.Ihatehurtingpeople.Ihatehurtingsomeonewho’sbeennothingbutgoodto
meevenmore.Thewholething…”
“Sucks?”
“Aperfectwordforit,”sheagreedmiserably.
“Anythingyouwanttovent?”
Shedidn’t.Nottoanyone.AndmaybenottoGarrettespecially.Yetthesilencehadbeenbeating
insideherforhoursnow.Silencethatwasn’tassimpleasguilt.“Reed’sbeenagoodfriendforyears.
SoIdidn’tjustloseafiancé.Ilostafriend.”
Garrettsaidnothing.Justleanedhisheadagainstthefarporchwallthewaysheleanedherheadin
theshadowsatherend.
“Foralongtime…foryears…Iwasdeterminednottomarry,didn’twantanythingtodowith
marriage.Irememberallthatwild,lustyheatIfeltwithyou….”
“SodoI.”
“Butwhenyouwentofftocollege,brokeitoff,youknowwhat?OnceIwasthroughsuffering
fromacrushedheart,Istartedfeelingrelieved.Evenasagirl,eventhatyoung,Iwasafraidofthat
chemistry.”Hedidn’tprodher,didn’tpush—which,damnhim,madeitallthatmucheasiertospill
herguts.“Myparentshavepossiblyoneofthesickestmarriagesaround.Notthesickest.Butoneof
thetrueterrible-for-each-otherrelationships.”
“Myparents’marriagemightbeabletocompeteatthatlevel.”
“That’sthething.Themoneyinthiscommunity,thepower,isfabulous.There’ssomuchpotential
todosomuchgood.Andwedo.Ilovethisarea.Butwhenmoneyandsexgettogether…”Sheshook
herheadexpressively.
“I’mnotsureIgetit…howthatrelatestowhyyouneverwantedtomarry.”
“Becausethat’salwayshowitis.Marriagesherearemergers.Awomanantesuponhersideofthe
dealwithsex,usinghersexualskillstoattractandkeepthemostpowerfulman.AndIjust…”
“What?”
“Ijustneverwantedtolivemylifethatway.”
“Comeon,Em.Therewasneveranyruleyouhadtoplaylifebythoseconditions.”
“Arule,no.Butthepressureneverletup.Myparents,mygrandmother,ardentlywantedmetobe
married—totherightman,intherightfamily—tostarthavingkidsandaddingtotheDearborn
dynasty.AnditseemedlikeReedwasananswerbecausehewassuchagoodfriend.Untilyoucame
home.”
“Hey,how’dIenterthisequation?”
“Because,youhorribleman,I’dtalkedmyselfintobelievingforyearsthatchemistrywasn’t
important.Didn’thavetobeimportant.Iwasn’tremotelyafraidofasexualrelationshipwithReedor
worrieditwouldn’tbeallright.Ididn’twantmore.ItneveroccurredtomethatIwascheatinghimof
more.”
Sheleanedforward,shootingGarrettaharsh,sternglareinthedarkness—evenifshecouldn’t
quiteseehisface.
“Butyoukissedme,”shesaidsoftly.“AndIwasbackrememberingwhatitwasliketobeseventeen
again.Hotandhungry.Fullofyearning.Andsuddenlyitwasn’tenoughtospendawholelifetimeof
allright.”
“I’vebeenheldresponsibleforafairnumberofthingsinmylifetime.Beingcold-bloodedin
businessdeals.Beingcluelessinrelationships.Beingtoughinnegotiations.ButIdon’tthinkanyone
eversuggestedmykissingtechniquehadanypowerbefore.”
“You’rejoking.I’mnot.Darnit,Garrett,you’veruinedmylife,”shesaid.Andstood.
Seven
Garrettsawherwalkingtowardhiminthedarkshadowsoftheporch.Heassumedshewascoming
closetoengageinamoreseriousconversation.She’djustclaimedthathe’druinedherlife.Only
therewassomethingoddinhertone,notjustthehintofhumorhewasn’texpecting,butsomething
else.
Thatsomethingelsewasinthegleamofhereyeswhensheleaneddown…croucheddown…and
thenpounced.
Theaimonherfirstkissmissedthemark.Herlipssmooshedhischeek,butthenhomedmore
accuratelythanradaronthetargetshereallywanted.Inthedarkcorneroftheporch,wherehewas
sittingcross-leggedonamat,hefeltherelbowdigintohisribandherfannynestleintohislap—
initiallythreateningthefamilyjewels.Hecaughtapalehintofperfume.Feltthesilkylonggowndrift
aroundhim.Tastedthenakedsoftnessofherlips.
Unlesshedidsomething—andquickly—hesuspectedshewaseithergoingtoinjureor
permanentlymaimhim.Enthusiasmcouldbeadangerousthing,yetseveringthekissdidn’tseemto
beanoption.
Inathousandyearshe’dneverexpectedEmmatojumphim.Shewasn’tthejumpingtype.Yetmore
evocativethanbeingjumpedbyEmmawasherlackoffinesse.Shereallycouldn’thavedonethis
much.Ifever.
Andherlackofexperienceseemedtomakehisbloodrushlikeahot,wildriver.Stilllatchedonto
her,heusedonehandtosnugdownherspine,toleanherdown,down,untilshewaslyingonthemat.
Hestillhadaleghookedunderher,akneethreateningtobreak,buthemanagedtopullthatlooseand
thenhecouldliewithher.Lengthtolength.Stilllatchedtogether.Andwithbothhandsfreenowto
holdherstill,toframeherface,toinvestpressureandemotionandpromiseintothenextsetof
kisses.
Hetookhertongue.Heardherheaveasigh,abreathy,artlessgroan.Amiserablegroanoflonging
andwanting.
Hergownwasheldupbyaswathofsilkononeshoulder.Thatwasall.Herothershoulderwas
bare,softerthanababy’sbutt,andwhenhislipstraileddown,hefoundthesoftthuddingpulseinher
throat,thefragilelineofhercollarbone.Andthatnakedshoulderhadhimsodamnedmesmerized
thathehadtotasteandnuzzle.
Herkneeshotupasifshewantedtowindalegaroundhim,yetnearlyconnectedwithhisfamily
jewelsagain.
Controlslipped.Garrettneverletcontrolslip.Notinlife,notinwork,notinsex.Buthell,shewas
justsowild.Forhim.Asimpossibleasitseemed,shewaswildforhim.
Hisemotionaltimberswerealreadyshaken,heknewthat.He’dbeenupallnight.Norest,nosleep.
Itbotheredhimfiercelythathe’dseenthatprivatescenebetweenherandReed.Itbotheredhimthat
Reedhadn’tfoughtforherthewayamanshouldhavefoughtforanunforgettablewomanlikeEmma.
Itbotheredhimthatshe’dlookedsobowedandcowedafterKellylefther.
Forhourshe’dtoldhimselftostayoutofit;herrelationshipwithReedwasnoneofhisbusiness.
Besideswhich,hewasafraiditwouldembarrassEmmaifhesaidanything.Noonewantedscenes
likethatwitnessedbyanyone.Whowaseverhappywithhowtheybrokeuporfoughtwithsomeone?
Thosesceneswerealwayshorrible.
Butdamn,itwassoobviousthatshe’dfeltterrible.Andwhenhe’dfinallyescapedthedanceand
hightailedithome,he’dfoundhimselfstandinginhisupstairswindow,watchingforlightsatColor.
Hell,hedidn’tevenknowifthat’swhereshe’dlandthatnight.Butthenhe’dseenthelightsgoon,a
trailfromthefrontofthegalleryleadingtowardtheback…andthennothing.
He’dpaced.Andpaced.Naturallytherewasn’tmuchhecouldseefromthesecond-storywindow
twohousesdownfromhers.Whenhe’dgottenaroundtorealizingthathewasdownrightspyingon
her,he’dwantedtowhackhimselfupsidethehead.Hedidn’tdothingslikethat.Butfinallyhejust
couldn’tstandit.Hehadtoknowshewasallright.
Andnowheknew.
Shewasn’tallright.
Clearlyshewasn’tremotelyallright.
Shetwistedfrombeneathhim,kneltandtuggedfoldsonfoldsupofthesilkygownoverherhead.
Beneath,sheworeasatinthong.Herhaircamedowninacloudaroundhercheeks,andbeforehis
brainhadtimetoregisterhowdazzlingshewas,howexquisite,she’dcomebacktohim.
“Loveme,Gar,”shewhispered.“Wemissedthislasttimearound.Idon’twanttomissitagain.I
wanttoknow—I’veneededtoknow,allthistime.Whatwearetogether.Whatwecouldhavebeen.”
Hervoice,solikevelvet,caressedhimalmostasevocativelyasherhands.Hedredgedupsome
sanityfromGodknewwhere.“Emma,Ididn’tcomehereforthis.Iswear.Iunderstand,you’reupset
—”
“Didn’tyouwonderhowitwouldbebetweenus?”shewhispered.
“Yes.”Nowaytodenyit.Nowaytodenyanythingwithherfingers,pleatedopen,skimmingup,his
ribs,hischest,tohisneck…herlipsonlyabreathaway.
“Iregretteditamilliontimes.Thatwedidn’tmakelovebackthen.”
“Me,too.”
“I’mtiredofregrets,Gar.I’velivedbytheruleseverywhichwayIknowhow.They’renot
working.Iwantyou.I’vewantedyouforever.Areyougoingtosayno?”
Asifhecould.Maybeawhileback—afewminutesback—hemighthavestillhadabrainandsome
principles,butnowanythinkingpowerhe’deverhadwaspressingthickandhardagainstherbelly.
He’dlabelitlust,exceptthiswasahelluvalotmorelethalthanlust.
Whenhetookhermouththistime,itwasdifferent.Whenheleveledherontothemat,everything
wasdifferent.Hetoldhimselfthathe’dturnedintotheseducer,yetitwasn’ttrue.Theywerebothon
fire,bothinafrenzy—totoucheverywhere,tocherish,toclaim.
Hehadnoideawhathappenedtothatsatinthong,buttherewasnothingbetweenthemwhenit
mattered.Whenhethrustinsideher,hefeltasifsomethingshatteredinsidehim,asifsomepartof
himhadbeenprotectedbyashellallhislife,andwithherthatprotectiveshellwaslost.
Hewantedher.Neededher.Likeair,likefire,likeearth.Herscent,hersounds,hertaste…hewanted
allofher,everywhichwayfromSunday,now,immediately,completely.
Shecalledhisname,grippinghimtightlywithherinnermuscles,incitinghimhigher,faster,
harder.“Loveme,”shekeptwhisperingsoftly,fiercely,asiftherewereeveratimewhenhehadn’t.
Whenthefirstspasmofreleaseshudderedthroughher,hecouldnolongerholdback.Violentwith
need,relentlessatdrivingherhigherthanshe’deverbeen,herodethembothtotheedge…andthen
tippedover.
Bythetimehesankagainsther,buryinghisfaceinherhair,hecouldn’thaverousedforafire.
Nothingcouldhavemadehimleaveher.
Garretthadnoideahowlonghe’dbeenasleep,butwhenhiseyessuddenlyopened,thesunwas
pokingitsheadoverthehorizon.Asoft,smokylightseepedthroughtheporchscreens.Robinswere
havinganorgyinthedew-drenchedgrass,pluckingworms.Someone’scatprowledthewhitepicket
fenceline.AndhewasstrokingEmma’sbackwhileshewasstrokinghis.Sidebyside,bothoftheir
headsonthesamejacquardpillow.
Thematbeneaththemwasascomfortableandyieldingasbamboospikes.Still,hedidn’tmove.He
hadthecraziestfeelingthathe’dbeenlookingintohereyesjustlikethis,exactlylikethis,right
beforehe’dcompletelycrashed.
“AmItheonlyonewhoslept?”hemurmured.
“No.Idroppedofflikeastone.BetterthanI’vesleptinweeksandweeks.”
“Butshort.”OneofthemmusthavepulledherGreciangownoverthem.Themorningwaswarm
enough,yetthegownhardlymadeanadequateblanket.Andstillneithermoved.“Whattimedoyou
openthegallery?”
“Notuntilten.ButJosh’llbeherebynine-thirty,latest.”
“Soweneedalltracesofcrimeerasedbythen?”
“TheonlycrimeIcanthinkof,”shemurmured,“isthatInevertriedseducingyoubackwhenwe
wereteenagers.”
“Youwereprettystraightbackthen.”
“Stillam,”sheconfessed.
“Notwithme.”
“Notwithyou,”shewhisperedandkissedhim.Theycouldn’thavecaughtmorethanacouple
hours’sleep,yethewassuddenlyarousedagain.
Morethanaroused.Onfire.Forher,onlyforher.
Sheclosedhereyesandjustseemedtoloseherselfinhim.Sherespondedblindly,fiercely,toevery
touch,everykiss,everysound,asifnomanhadeverseepedthroughherdefensesthewayhedid,as
ifshe’dneverwantedbefore,neverneededbefore.
Ormaybethatwasjusthim.Feelingthatwayabouther.Evenasateenager,hecouldn’trecall
feelingthiscrazy.Hewantedtobewithhermorethanhewantedlifeorbreath.Hedidn’tcareabout
tomorrow.Didn’tcareaboutanythingbuthavingher,takingherandbeingtaken.
Ashetuggedherbeneathhim,hehadn’tforgottenhissister ’sgraveproblems…orthepublic
complicationsofEmma’scalled-offengagement.Inamatterofhours,theybothhadtofacethe
realityofheavyproblemsintheirlives.
Maybethatpropelledhimtobeabetterloverthanhewas.Abetterloverthanhethoughthecould
be.ButwhenEmma’slegswerewrappedaroundhim,herthroatarchedasshesurrenderedtorelease,
hefeltawild,crazyrushthatwasfarmorethanorgasmic.
Alltheseyears,he’dnevermarried.Inthatinstantheknewitwasbecausehe’dneverreallytrusted
anyone.Inhisworld,heonlytrustedhimself….Yethe’dalreadytrustedEmmawithhisfearsabout
hissister,abouthislife.Andnow,irrevocably,hewastrustingherwithhisheart.
Withher,allhissecretswerecomingoutofthewoodwork.
Hewasinlovewithher.
Realizingitwasthemostterrifyingsensationhecouldremember.Butdamn,itwasbeyond
wonderful.
Emmalefthimsleeping,knowinghowlittleresthe’dhad.Shetookafewsecondstorestorethe
gallerytoorder,turningofflightsandturningonthephones,beforehustlingintotheshower.
Assheshouldhaveexpected,thephonestartedringingtheinstantshesteppedunderthespray.Her
hairwasfoamedupwithshampoowhensheheardasecondroundofringing.Andshewasdryingoff
andtiptoeingaroundherbedroomofftheporchwhenshehearditringyetagain.
Damn.Soonshehadtostarttakingthosecalls.Itdidn’tmatterhowexhaustedshewas,sheknewshe
couldn’tescapeafullscheduletoday.Shetwistedherstilldamphairintoachignon,pulledonalight
linenskirtandT-shirt,pushedherfeetintosandals,tookabreathandthenaimedbackfortheporchto
findherlover.
Itwasinherheart,thatbeat.Thatfind-her-loverbeat.Itwasn’tfamiliar,thesong,themusic,yetin
spiteofeverything—andGodknowssheknewshewasfacingArmageddontoday—herheartcouldn’t
seemtostopsinging.
OnthebackporchshefoundGarrett,lookinggroggy-eyedandwild-haired,wearing
undershorts…andmakingherwanttolaugh,becausehiscellphonelookedgluedtohisear.He
couldn’tescapehisbusinesslifeanymorethanshecouldescapehers.
Foramomentshejustsavoredthelookofhim.Inhighschool,kidshadpeggedhimasabrain
morethanajock.Butshe’dgottentoknowthatbarechestbackthen,hadalwaysknownhisshoulders
werelikemarble,hischesttightlymuscled.
Shehadn’tknownwhatacreativeloverhe’dbe.Andwhenhesuddenlynoticedherinthedoorway,
sherealizedshe’dneverknownhowvulnerablethosewickeddeepbrowneyescouldbe,either.
Emotionhungbetweenthem.Somethingwarmerthanthesultrymorning,somethingmagical.He
liftedahandinagestureinvitinghercloserandimmediatelycutshortthecall.
“Hey,beauty,”hemurmured.
“Hey,you,”shemurmuredrightback.“IthoughtIheardyourphoneringingseveraltimes,because
yourringersoundissodifferentthanmine.ButIknewIwasinforpersonalcallstoday.What’sthis
foryou—workcallsstartbuggingyouevenbeforeseveninthemorning?”
“Hey,youdon’tgettheplaqueforbeingaworkaholicifyougetoffthetreadmill.”
“Butyougetcallsthisearlyallthetime?”
“Justthenatureofthework,Emma.”Itwasjustidleconversation.Hewaslookingather.Shewas
lookingathim.
Allshewantedwastoclimbbackonthatimpossiblyhardmatwithhimandmakeloveallday.
She’dneverthoughtofherselfasafragilewoman,butrightnowshefeltmorefragilethanasingle
silkthreadinthesunlight.ItwasGarrett’sdoing.Whenhe’dfoundherlastnight,she’dbeenso,so
low.Yethe’dmadeherfeellikeawoman,thewayshe’dneverfeltaboutherselfasawoman.
Shewantedtotellhim.Toshowhim.
Butalongdaywaswaitingforher.Andshewasunsurewhatlastnighthadmeanttohim.Besides
which,thecirclesunderhiseyestattledhowhardhe’dbeenpushingitsincehe’dcomehome.
Sheshookherhead.“Garrett,youwerealwaysthatway.Driven.Committed.Never-say-die.”
“Iknow.They’reontheheavylistsoffaults.”
“They’rewonderfulqualities,youdoofus.Butforthenexthourandahalfyou’returningoffthe
phoneandcomingwithme.”
“Goingwhere?Anddoesthewherehavecoffee?”
“You’regoingfingerpainting.Andyes,I’llgetyoucoffeefirst.”
“Fingerpainting.Yeah,right,”hesaidwithalaugh.
Naturallyhethoughtshewasjoking.Shebribedhim—ifheturnedoffhiscellphoneforanhour,
she’dtellhimthetruth.Bythetimeshe’dsuccessfullyconfiscatedhisphone,theywereinherwhite
van,cartingmugsofalmond-toffeejavaasshedrove.Andtold.
Itwasoneofhersecrets.Notabigone,butnevertheless,notpublicknowledge.GarrettknewLily
CartwrightbutnotthatLilyusedtobeasocialworkerforEastwickCaresorthatshe’dhookedEmma
upwiththegrief-counselingcenter.
“Istilldon’tgetit.Howdoyougetfromgriefcounselingtofingerpainting?”
Sheshowedhim.Thebuildingwasnew,builtinashadycul-de-sacwithawatergardenandducks—
althoughtheducks,sheadmitted,werestrictlyvolunteer.Whentheywalkedinside,fourchildrenwere
sittingoncandy-coloredbeanbags.
“Sheesh,youguysareearly,”shetoldthesquirts,whoswarmedthemboth.Marthawasthree,
Georgewasfive,andthetwofour-year-oldswereElisabethandPops.
“Ishegonnapaintwithus,Ms.Dearborn?”
“Ikeepingtellingyou,youcancallmejustplainEmma,honest.Andyes.HisnameisGarrett
Keating.Andbelieveitornot,he’sneverfingerpaintedinhiswholelife.”Becausehelookedstunned
andscaredatthedoor,shehookedhisarm.
“You’rekidding.”Pops,thepint-sizeblondewiththetwinkly-lighttennies,tookhisotherarm.
“You’rereallyold.”
“Thanks,”Garrettsaid.
“What’dyoudowhenyouwereakid?Like,ifyouneverfingerpainted?”Elisabethwantedto
know.
“Heprobablydoesn’tremember.He’sold,”thepint-sizeblondevolunteeredagain.
Emmasteeredthempasttheopenkitchen,pastthecentralmeetingplace.Theroomswere
constructedinawagon-wheelfashion.
Olderteenagersweregivenaroomwitheasychairsandcuddlingblankets.Preteenshadaroom
withgamesandwallstheycouldwriteon.Thelittleones,though,werehers.
Herroomcouldbehoseddown—orthatequivalent.Goodthing,becausetheartprojectsshegot
thesquirtsintoinvariablyinvolvedpaintorclayorsomethingthatgotoneverything.Beforehanding
outaprons—includingoneforGarrettthatmadeherbabiesalllaugh—shehidthephonesfrom
harm’sway.
WhenshesethercellphonenexttoGarrett’sonasafetopshelf,shenoticedimmediatelythatshe’d
missedahalf-dozencallssincelastnight—threeofthemfromhermother.Shegulped.Butnotfor
long.
Latertodayshe’ddealwithhermotherandalltheotherrealitiesrelatedtoherbrokenengagement.
Thismorningwasaboutsomethingelse.Thekids…andGarrett.Garrett,whomadetonsofmoney
andtooktonsofresponsibility.Garrett,who’dbeensotenderandpassionatewithher.Garrett,who
neverplayed.
Therewasn’tmuchshecouldgivebacktohim,butshecoulddarnwellteachhimtoplay.Shejust
wantedthesemomentsofmagictolastaslongastheycould.Forher.Butforhim,too.
“Now,stoplookingatMr.Garrett.Hehastowearmyapronbecausewedon’thaveonehissize.We
don’tlaughatotherpeople,dowe?”
“No,”Garrettsaidpitifullyandgotthekidslaughingagain.
Shegatheredthemaroundthetableasshesetoutsupplies.“Okay.Iwanteverybodytocloseyour
eyes.Iknowyou’veallfeltsadlately.ButthismorningIwantyoutoconcentrate.Iwantyoutothink
aboutsomethinghappy.Somethingbeautiful.Andthat’swhatIwantyoutopaint.Colorsthatyouthink
arebeautiful.Colorsthatmakeyouhappytolookat.”
“Idon’tknow.Ishetoooldtobehappy?”PopscockedherheadtowardGarrett.
EmmaintervenedbeforeGarrettneededtocomeupwithananswer.“Noone’severtoooldtobe
happy.Butsometimesthingshappenthatmakeussad.Wecan’tmakethatfeelinggoaway.Butitcan
helpifwerememberwhatmakesushappy.So…areyouallreadytotry?”
“I’dbetterhelphim.”AgainPopscockedherheadatGarrettwithasigh,asifthejobwereso
weightyshewastiredalready.
Alittlemorethananhourlater,thelasturchinhadbeenpickedup.Anotheragegroupwas
occupyingroomsatthecenterwhenEmmaandGarrettleftthebuilding.Emmahadtoteasehim.“I’ve
neverseenafour-year-oldflirtbefore.Whatafemmefatale.”
“Flirt?Flirt?Shewasafour-year-oldcurmudgeon.NothingIdidwasright.Andshelaiditon
damnthickaboutmybeingold,old,old.”
“Shefellinlovewithyouonsight.Couldn’tyoutell?”
“Wasthatbeforeoraftershefingerpaintedaredheartonmysleeve?”Hemotionedtotheeloquent
redpaintonhissleeve.“Doesthiscomeout?”
“Itshould.Butifitdoesn’t,I’llbetyoucanaffordanothershirt.”
Beforetheyreachedhervan,shehookedhishand,thenliftedupontiptoeandframedhisfacewith
herpalms.“Ihatetotellyouthis…”
“Uh-oh.Nothinggoodeverfollows‘Ihatetotellyouthis’—”
“Butyou’resmilingtobeattheband.You’rerelaxed.Youhadafabuloustimewiththekids,”she
saidsmugly.
“I’mnotadmittinganything.HowcouldIpossiblyhavehadagoodtimefingerpaintingwitha
bunchofhellions?”
“Itbeatsme—butyouwererightinthethickofitall.Ithinkyoumadeabiggermessthantheydid.
Thatseemslikeheadlinenewstome.Infact,ifBunnywerestillalive,Icouldcallher,putitinthe
infamousEastwickSocialDiary.Noonewouldbelievethishugeascandalunlesstheysawitinprint.”
Hiseyesnarrowed.Buthehadn’tmoved,didn’tseemtomindherpinninghimwithherhands.
“You’vegotanevilsidetoyou,EmmaDearborn.”
“Oh,thankyou.That’sthenicestthinganyone’ssaidtomeinyearsandyears.”
Shewasn’tsurehowithappened,butsomehowshe’dendedupinhisarmsagain.Infact,he’d
seemedtoquitearrogantlyleanagainsttheshadysideofhervanandnestleherrightintotheVofhis
thighs.“Youwanttohearnicethings?”hequestioned.
Shesobered,becausehe’dsuddenlydroppedtheeasy,teasingtone.Hereyessoftened.“WhatI
want…isforyounottoregretlastnight.”
“That’smyline,Em.Whenyouwokeupthismorning,Iwasafraidyou’dthinkItookadvantageof
you.”
“ThewayIrememberit,Ijumpedyou.SoIshouldgetthecreditfortakingadvantage,notyou.”
Buthewasn’tbuyingthat.Andthoughhewasholdingherclose,hisgazekindledmorethandesire.
“You’djustbeenthroughareallyemotionalsituation.Youwereupset,vulnerable.Icameover
becauseyourlightsstayedonsolate….Ijustgotworried,thoughtyoumightneedsomeonetotalkto,
venton.ButIswear,Iwasn’ttryingtocauseanawkwardcomplicationinyourlife.”
Shesaidquietly,honestly,“Garrett,youareacomplicationforme.Youhavebeeneversinceyou
camehome.”
Hewentstill.Wary-still.Acarpulledintothecenter ’sparkinglot.Noisykidsspilledout.Henever
noticed,neverlookedaway.
Shetookanervousbreath.“Ithinkalotofpeoplewouldjudgemymakinglovewithyouyesterday
aswrong.WrongbecauseIwassorecentlyengaged,wrongbecauseitlookedlikeareboundthing.
ButIwantyoutoknow…itwasn’tlikethat.Whatyou’vedonesinceyoucamehomewasbringout
feelingsinmethatIdidn’tknowIhad.Allkindsoffeelings.Notjustsexualones.IfI’dmarriedReed,
itwouldhavebeenwrong.That’sthetruth.”
“Yousoundverysure.”
“I’mabsolutelypositive.IloveReedthewayyouloveawonderfulclosefriend.ButIneverloved
him…sexually.Intimately.Tobetotallyhonest,IthoughtthefeelingsIhadforhimwerealltherewas.
ForagesIjustthoughtI’mnotaparticularlysexualperson—”
“Youcan’tbeserious.”
Shefelthisthumbnudgingastrandofhaironhercheekthathadloosenedfromitschignon.His
touchwassotendershewantedtoshiver.“I’mveryserious.Itwasalwayseasyformedothecelibate
thing.Inprinciple,fordarnsure,IneverwantedtobecourtedbecauseIwasanheiresstothe
Dearbornmoney,didn’twanttobepartofsomemerger.Butnow,Irealizethatitwaseasytohold
tighttothoseprinciples…becauseIwasneverreallytempted.”
“Theguysgrowinguphereusedtobesosmart.TheymusthavegottenalotstupiderintheyearsI
wasaway.”
Shesmiledbecausehewantedherto.“You’regoingtothinkthisismightyPollyannaish,but…”
“Butwhat?”
“ButIwantedmakinglovetobebeautifulorIneverwanteditatall.Inthegrandschemeofthings,I
realizebeautydoesn’trateupthereasseriouslyimportant.It’shardlyworldpeaceorcuringworld
hungeroranything.ButIalwaysfelt…beautydoesmatter.Itcanmakeadifference.Beautyaroundus
cangiveuspeaceandhopeand…”Shestartedtolaughatherself…“Andallthatnonsense.”
“That’snotnonsense,Emma.”
“Well,Irealizeit’shardlyarealisticviewoftheworld.Which,Godknows,myfamilyisalways
tellingme.ButI’mjusttryingtosaythatlastnightwasbeautiful.Forme.ItwaswhatI’dheldoutfor.
AndI’mgladIdid.”
Sheraisedupagainandkissedhim.Notakissofenticement.Just…shewantedtogivehim
somethingsweetandhonest.Soherlipsbrushedhis,softerthanawhisper.Morefleetingthana
promise.
Shedidn’tknowwhathewantedfromher.Whathefelt.There’snowayshewouldhaveasked.It
wascrazytothinkhecouldpossiblycareasfiercelyanddeeplyasshedid—notthissoon.Notinthis
shortatime.Butherheartwasfilledtobrimmingoverwithemotionsandchoicesandwonderthat
shehadn’texpectedtofeel.
Rightorwrong,crazyornotcrazy—impossibleornotimpossible—sheknewshe’dfalleninlove
withhim.
Eight
Late-afternoonsunpouredthroughthewindshieldasEmmaturnedintoherparents’driveway.As
sheshutofftheengineandclimbedout,shetookalong,bracingbreath.
Thisvisitwasgoingtobedifficult,butithadtobedone.Sheowedherparentsamoreextensive
explanationaboutReedandthebrokenengagement.Andthisafternoonwasthebestpossibletimeto
handlethis,becauseshefeltararesurgeofstrength—notthepoisesheputoninpublicbutdarnnear
somethingreal.Sheactuallywantedtohavethistalkwithherparents,wantedtobehonestwiththem.
Itamazedher.
SheknewGarrettwasthecatalystforthatboostofconfidence.Darnit,atherage,sheshouldn’t
needsomebodyelsetovalidateher.Buthehad.He’dmadeherfeelacceptedandwantedforwhoshe
was—notwhootherswantedhertobe.Andasshehikedtothefrontdoor,shefeltaneasinessonthe
insideshehadn’texperiencedinamonthofSundays.
Pausingbeforeentering,sheglancedup.Shelovedthishouse,alwayshad.Dearbornshadbuiltita
centurybefore.Withitsfourchimneysandmultipleroofsandgothicturrets,itwasn’tquiteacastle
butalmost.Asayounggirlshe’dfantasizedaboutbeautyandperfection,formedbythegorgeous
homesurroundingher.Thehouseitselfhadalwaysgivenherasenseofsecurity,especiallywhenreal
lifehadn’tbeenthateasywhenshewasakid.
Sheletherselfin,calling,“Mom!Dad!I’mhome!”
Funny,butshe’dbeensleepingsooftenatColorthatshe’dpracticallyforgottenthiswastechnically
stillheraddress.Hermomrushedoutofthelivingroom,herheelsclatteringontheparquetfloor.At
aglanceEmmacouldseeshewassober,whichwasbothareliefandasurprise.ButDianawasusually
impeccablygroomed,andtodayherwhitelinenslacksandtoplookedsleptin,herhairindisarray.“I
calledandcalledyou.Whydidn’tyouanswer?”
“ButIdid,Mom.IleftamessagethatI’dbeherethisafternoon.Iknewyou’dbeupsetoverthe
breakup,butitalsowasn’tsomethingwecoulddiscussinaquickphonecall.Ihadameetingthis
morningandthenIhadtohavelunchwithFelicitytostartcallingoffalltheweddingarrangements
—”
Hermotherwavedafrantichand,clearlyexpressingthatthosewereunnecessarydetails.“Youhave
togetReedback.Rightnow,today.Immediately.Youhavetomarryhim.David!”shecalled,although
shenevertookhereyesoffherdaughter.“Emma,youhavetolistentous!”
Emmastiffened,losingsomeofthesurenessshe’dfeltwalkinginhere.HertimewithGarrett
suddenlyseemedamillionhoursago.“Mom,IknowhowfondyouareofReed.AndIknowhow
muchyouwantedtohavetheweddinghere,butI’lltakecareofcancelingallthosearrangementsand
details—”
“Ithasnothingtodowiththearrangementsorexpense,youfoolish,foolishgirl.David!”
Herfathershowedupinthedoorway.Shegotaquickhug.Veryquick.Theygotjustcloseenough
forhertofeelhispoker-straightspine,toseethetightlinesaroundhiseyes.“Honey,youdon’t
realizewhatyou’vedone.”
“OfcourseIdo.Icalledoffanengagement.”
“Youthrewawayafortune,”hermothersaidfuriously.“Nowcomeinhereandsitdown.Afterwe
talk,youcancallReedandmakeituptohim.”
Somethingwaswrong.Nothingtheyweresayingwasmakingsense.Theserenityshe’dwalkedin
withcompletelydesertedher.“Whatonearthareyoutalkingabout?”
Theyflankedhergoingintothelivingroom.Unlikeanormalafternooninthiscoral-and-cream
room,though,therewasnodecanterofscotchonthepricelessChinesemirroredcoffeetable,noTV
onbroadcastingthenews,nofancyhorsd’oeuvrestomunchon.Infact,theroomwassostill,it
resembledashowpiece.
“Sit,”herfatherordered.
Theyalldid,butitwashermotherwhostartedtalking.“You’vethrownawaymillionsofdollars,”
shesaiddramatically.
Itwashermom’smom,theSoulesideofthefamily,who’dcomeoverontheMayflower.Herdad
hadmarriedintothatoldaristocracy—andoldmoney.Hissidewashardlypoor,andheavenknew,
he’dmadehisownfortune.ButitwastheoldSoulemoneythataddeduptoapieceoftherock.At
least,theDearbornrock.
“Comeon,youtwo.Fillmein.Idon’thaveacluewhatyou’retalkingabout.”
“Emma,youclaimedforyearsthatyouhadnointerestinmarrying.Yourgrandmotherwasafraid
youmeantit.Sowerewe.Andthere’dbenoonetopassonthewholeDearbornlegacyunlessyou
marriedandhadchildren.Soyourgrandmothermadeitaconditionofyourtrust…thatyouhadto
marrybeforetheageofthirtytogetthemoney.”
ForthefirsttimeEmmastartedtobelievethatherparentsweren’tjustgivingherattitudeand
dramatics.“Waitaminute,”shesaidquietly.“Justslowdown.Nooneevertoldmeanyofthisbefore
—”
“Wedidn’tthinkwehadto,honey.BecauseonceyoustartedseeingReed,webothcouldseethat
relationshipwasbecomingserious.Ifyoujustgothroughwiththewedding,everythingwillbefine.I
knowyouhadn’tsetafirmdate,butitwasalwaysgoingtobeattheendofJulyorearlyAugust.
Definitelybeforeyourthirtiethbirthday.Soallyouhavetodoisfollowthrough—”
“Whoa.Justholdon.”Emmastoodup,stilltryingtograspthis.
She’dbeenateenagerwhenhergrandmotherdied,andthatwasthefirstshe’dbeentoldaboutthe
trust—andtheconsiderablesizeofthetrust.Thatsecurityhadaffectedeverychoiceshe’dmadeasan
adult.“Grandmadidn’tknowIdidn’tplantomarry.Iwasjustakid—”
“Butyoualwaystalkedthatway,Emma.Theonlytimeitwasdifferentwaswhenyouwerewiththe
Keatingboy.Butasachild—andafteryouandGarrettsplitup—youalwayssangthesametune.
Aboutnotwantingtomarry.Notneedingtomarry.Andyourgrandmother—”
Emmaheardthatout.“Allright—butifthetrustdoesn’tgotome,whodoesitgoto?”
“Yourgrandmothermadealistofcharitiesandcauses,ifyoufailedtomarry.It’salllegal.Of
course,youcouldfightit,buttheattorneystoldusfranklythatyou’dhavenolegalground—”
“There’snothingI’dwanttofight,”Emmasaidquietly.“Ifthat’swhatmygrandmotherwanted,it
wouldseemshemadeherchoices.”
“Don’tberidiculous,Emma,”herfathersaidheavily.“JustcallReed.Whateverriftyouhad,I’m
sureit’smendable.You’rebothreasonablepeople,hardlychildrenanymore.Everyonehas
arguments.Ican’timagineeitherofyoudoingsomethingthatwasn’tredeemable.”
Herdad’svoiceseemedtofade,asifheweretalkingfromadistance.Shesawhislipsmoving,saw
hermother ’slipsmoving.
Theywerebothtalkingtoheratthesametime,quicklyandurgently.
Emmahadthesuddenfoolishfeelingthatsomeonehadjustsmackedherupsidethehead.Noone
had,notphysically.Buttheshockofitallfinallysankin.
Ifshedidn’tmarrybeforeherthirtiethbirthday,she’dloseeverything.Color.Sheknewhowmuch
moneysheowedonthegallery,knewitstillwasn’tpayingforitself—notthewayshe’dchosentorun
it.Allthistime,she’dthoughtshecouldindulgeherbeliefthatthegallerywasforthecommunity’s
benefitinsteadofforchasingaprofit.She’dwantedtoexposeEastwicktonewartistsandnewideas,
toallkindsofartandbeauty,evenifthosechoicesdidn’tpayherbackfinancially.Shecouldhaverun
thegallerydifferently,butshe’dbeensopositiveshehadthatmassivetrustfundcomingtosupportit
andherself.
Andallthistimeshe’dhappilyvolunteeredwithtroubledteenagersthroughEastwickCaresandthe
littlekidsthroughthegriefcenter.Becauseofherfinancialsecurity,she’dbeenabletogivehertime
withoutworryingaboutgettingpaid.
Herclothes,herjewelry,theskiingweekinVailandrentingayachtinItaly…forsure,she’dlived
indulgently.Butthere’dneverbeenareasontobudget.Ortolearnhowtobudget.Ifshehadn’tlived
sodarnextravagantly,maybeshe’dhavethemoneysockedawaytosavehergalleryandeverything
else.Butshedidn’t.Becauseshe’dneverthoughtsheneededto.
Sheliftedahandinagestureaskingherparentstostoptalking.Shecouldn’thearthemanyway.She
couldn’tseemtohearanythingrightnow,exceptforthethuddingdruminthepitofherstomach.“I
needsometimetothinkaboutthis,”shesaid.“I’mgoingtogoupstairsnow.”
Shedidn’twaitforthemtoagreeornot,justlefttheroom.Untilshereachedthebottomofthe
stairs,shewasn’tawareherfatherhadfollowedher.Davidtouchedhershouldertomakeherturn
around.
“Emma,”hesaidquietly,“Ijustdon’tunderstandhowyoucouldbesoselfish.”
“Selfish?”Theaccusationconfusedher,whenshewastheonewho’djusthadherwholelifethrown
inthewind.Butofcourse,thatwasn’tcompletelytrue.“Dad,Irealizethatcallingtheweddingoffis
upsettingforyouandMom.Butthemarriagewouldhavebeenaterriblemistake.Neitherofuswas
goingtobehappy.”
“Maybeyoubelievethat.Butifyoucan’tbehappywithagoodman,maybeyoudamnwellbetter
redefinehappiness.Noonegetseverythingtheywantinlife.”
Hesoundedmorelikeanarmycommanderthanafather.Butthen,healwayshad.Andasalways,
shecouldfeelherstomachknottingup.“Ineverthoughtthat,”shesaidquietlyandtriedtoturnaway
—butherfatherwasn’tthrough.
“We’vesupportedyouineverythingyoueverwanted.Youreducation.Yourartgallery.Haveyou
everaskedmeforanythingIdidn’twillinglygiveyou?Andyourmother.Wereyoueventhinkingof
her?Markmywords,Emma.Ifyourmothergoesonanotherbinge,it’llbeonyou.”
Thistimeitwasherfatherwhowhippedaroundandstrodeawayfromher.
Forthesecondtimeintwodaysshefoundhernervesjitteryandherheadpounding.Sheclimbed
thestairs,hopingthatifshejustsatalone,she’dgetabettergrip….Agoodtheory,butitdidn’twork
worthbeans.
Hersuiteofroomswasdecoratedinapricotandtaupe.Severalyearsbefore,hermotherhad
surprisedherbyredoingtherooms.Thefurnishingswereelegantandexpensiveandthoughtfully
chosen.Theyjustweren’tcolorsorfurniturethatEmmawouldeverhavechosen.Yetshe’dnever
objected,becausewhoknewwhatwasgoingtosendhermomclimbingbackintoabottle.
Emmasankonthedoublebed,feelingdisoriented…andunaccountablyangry.Allherlifeshe’d
beenthepeacemakerinthefamily.Allherlifeshe’dtriednevertorocktheboat,especiallybecause
thethreatofcausinghermothertodrinkwasever-present.Shewasonthefund-raisingcommitteeat
theclubbecausehermotherwantedaDearborndoingthatprestigiousjob.She’dnevermoved
completelyoutofthehousebecausehermotherclaimedtoneedher,claimedshecouldn’tbearupto
David’scritical,judgmentalattitude.HerfathercountedonhertobehostessforalltheDearborn
socialeventsbecausetheywerebothwaryofanypressureputonDiana.
Emmaclosedhereyes,feelingthethickhumidairdriftingfromthewestwindow.Thefrightening
partwasthatthethreatswerealwaystrue.AhundredtimesEmmahadtoldherselfthatherparents
neededtoresolvetheirproblemsbetweenthemselves.Butthesamethinghappenedoverandover—
whenEmmafailedtostepin,didn’tintervenewhenhermotherneededhelporplaydiplomatbetween
herparents,hermomdidtumbledownthealcoholichillagain.
InthelasttwodaysEmmahadtriedtodothewildthingandchangeroles.Takechargeofherlife.
Standupforherself.Redefinewhatwasimportanttoher.
Theresultseemedtobeacompleteshambles.Thelatest—thelossofhertrustfund—keptslapping
inhermindlikeminishockwaves.Itwasn’twealththatmatteredtoher,butthetrustfundhad
representedsecurity.Independence.Freedom.
Nowsheopenedhereyes,lookedaroundthepaleapricotwallsandfeltthemclosinginonher.
Thismorningshe’ddiscoveredthewonder,thejoyofbeingwildlyinlove.Butnowthosemoments
withGarrettseemedasifthey’dtakenplaceonanotherplanet.Claustrophobiaseemedtolocktheair
outofherlungs.Shefeltsotrappedshecouldhardlybreathe.Shesqueezedhereyesclosed,tryingto
getagrip.Herworldhadjustbeencompletelytippedonitsaxis,sonaturallyshefeltthrown.Only
thiswasmorethanthrown.
Shehadnoideawhattodonext.
Sheonlyknewthatshefeltcompletelyalone.Andlost.
BeforeturninginthedrivewayoftheBaldwinmansion,Garrettstoppedattheroadsideandused
hiscellphonetocallEmma.
Thefirsttwotimeshe’dcalled,he’dgottenJoshatColor.Joshhadpromisedtoleaveamessage
forEmmaonherdesk,buthedidn’tknowherschedule.Nothingoddaboutthat.Emmawasabusy
woman.ButthiswasthethirdtimeGarretthadbeenunabletoreachher.
Hetoldhimselfitwasidiotictoworry.Itwasjustthatthismorning…Hell,hewasstillhighfrom
lastnightandthismorning.Obviouslymakinglovewithawomanrightaftershe’dbrokenan
engagementwasterribletiming.Buthe’dneverbeforefelteuphorialikethis.Aconnectionlikethis.
Akite-high,heart-soaringthrillofafeelinglikethis.
Foralongtimehe’dbelievedthatselfish,drivenworkaholicslikehimselfweredoomedtobe
single.Whatwomanwouldwantthem?Theywereannoyingpersonalities.
Butdamn,shehadn’tmadehimfeelannoying.She’dmadehimfeellikethemostpowerful,sexy
loverintheuniverse—pastandpresent.Andno,hehadn’tgoneplumboffthedeependandassumed
shewasreadytomarryhim.
Butinhisgut,thatwasonhismind.TheMword.He’dneverwanteditbefore,neverfelttheneed
orpush.Butsuddenlyhecouldn’tgetthathopeoutofhishead,andEmmawasthedifference.Emma
was…
Stopthis,hementallyorderedhimself.Hepocketedhiscellphone,climbedoutofthecarand
strodeuptothefrontdoorofBunnyBaldwin’smansion.Hedidn’twanttostopthinkingaboutEmma,
buthestillhadmilestogothisday.ObsessingaboutEmmawasn’thelping.Untilhegotthosetasks
done,hecouldn’tseeEmmaanyway.
Heknockedonthedoor,waited.Momentslater,atidygray-hairedwomananswered.“CanIhelp
you?”sheasked.
“You’reEdithCarter?”
“Yes.”
“Mrs.Carter,Idon’tneedtocomein.Irealizeyoudon’tknowme,butIwastoldyouwereBunny
Baldwin’shousekeeperforyears.”Thegentle-eyedwomannodded.“I’mGarrettKeating.”
Immediatelysherelaxed.“Ofcourse.IknowtheKeatingfamily.Foramoment,Iwasafraidyou
wereanotheroneofthosereporters,tryingtodigintomoreofMrs.Baldwin’sprivatelife.”
“No,honestly.IonlystoppedbecauseIhopedtherewasachanceyoumightknowsomethingabout
mysister,CarolineKeating-Spence.She’sbeeninthehospital.I’vebeentryingtoputtogethera
pictureofwhathappenedintheweeksbeforeshegotsosick,andnooneseemstoknowanything.I
heardCarolinewasoftenoverhere—”
Edithnodded,lookingthoughtful.“Yes,shewas.SheandAbby—Mrs.Baldwin’sdaughter—were
friends.ThewholegroupofDebscameoverquiteoften.Bunnylovedhavingthegirlsaround.”
“Didyouhappentohearanythingaboutmysister?Anygossiporbadnews,anythingatall?”
“Yousoundsoworried,Mr.Keating,”shesaidcompassionately.“IwishIhadsomeinformation
foryou.”
“Butyoudon’t?”
Edithhesitated.“Idon’tknowifyouknewmyBunny,butshewasinterestedineverything
happeninginEastwick.Somesaidshewasnosy,butthetruthwasthatshesimplycaredabout
everythingandeveryone.Idon’tknowwhereshegotallhernews,butbyandby,shejustseemedto
knoweveryone’ssecrets.That’showshecametowritetheEastwickSocialDiary.”
“Yes,”Garrettsaid,wishingthishadtodowithhissisterbutnotseeinghow.
“Well,thethingis,nowallthosediariesaremissing.Herdaughter,Abby,thinkstherewas
informationinthosejournalsthatsomeonemighthavekilledhermotherfor.Thepolicearelooking
intoit.There’snoproof.Yet.But…”
Garrettwaited.
“I’mjustsaying,Mr.Keating,thatifthosediarieswouldjustsurface,youmightfindsomething
aboutyoursister…orsomeonerelatedtoyoursister.Somethingthatmightbethesourceofher
problem.BecauseifsomethingwasgoingoninEastwick,Bunnyknewit.”
“Butrightnowyoudon’tknowwherethosediariesare.”
Edithshookherhead.“I’msorry.Noonedoes.”
Oncewarmedup,Edithwentonandon.She’dobviouslydeeplycaredaboutheremployerand
neededtotellsomeonehowtraumatizedshe’dbeenbyBunny’sdeath.ApparentlyBunnyhadbeen
onlyfifty-two,healthyandfullofenergy.Althoughshe’dlovedgossip,she’dneverbeenvicious.
“Never,Mr.Keating,”Edithvowed.“Yes,shedishedthedirtonthewell-heeled.Butshenevertolda
lie,neverinventedorembellished.Sheonlytoldthetruth.AndpersonallyIthinkshemadeahuge
effortnottohurtanyonewhomighthavebeeninnocent.”
“I’msureshedid,”Garrettagreed,althoughhewasstartingtofeeldesperatethathewasevergoing
toescape.He’dhopedhe’dhearsomething,anything,abouthissisterCaroline,butEdithseemed
fixedonthenightheremployerhaddied.
“Ifoundher,Idid.Stillhaven’tgottenovertheshock,probablyneverwill.Inmyhead,Istillsee
herlyingthere.Iwasrightupstairs,puttingawaylinensintheupstairscloset,whenIsuddenlyheard
thisthud.Asifachairhadbeenknockedover.Thatkindofthud—”
“Iunderstand,”Garrettsaidswiftly.
“Well,thatthudwasmyBunny.Lyingonthefloorinthestudy.Itjustdidn’tmakesense.”Tears
welledinEdith’seyes.
“Itsoundshorrible.”Garretttriedtosoundsympathetic.
“Oh,itwas,itwas.Ican’tgetitoutofmymind.AndI’vestayedoninthehousebecauseAbby
askedmeto.Abby’sherdaughter,ofcourse,IthinkItoldyouthat—”
“Yes,Iknewthat.”
“Well,nooneknowswhat’sgoingtohappentotheBaldwinmansionyet.Soitstillneeds
caretaking.AndrightnowIdon’tthinkanyoneelsewouldwanttoliveherebecauseofwhat
happened.Ihardlydomyself,becauseeverywhereIturn,Irememberherlyinginthestudylikethat.
Shewasmorethananemployer,youknow.Shewasafriend.Afascinatingperson.It’sunbelievable
thatsomeonewouldkillher.Actuallymurderher.Ikeeptryingtoimaginewhatkindofsecretshe
knewthatwasthatbad—”
Heturnedthekeyonhiscarengine,gratefultobefree.YetlisteningtoEdithhadputanedgybeat
inhispulse.He’dneverpersonallyknownBunnyBaldwin,washard-pressedtoinvestinterestina
womanwho’dlivedforgossip.Butthesecretbusinessworriedhim,becausehissisterwasobviously
hidingsomekindofsecretthathadcausedherdepression—andherfeelingofguilt.
He’dcheckedoutEdith,knowingthatwomanwasalongshot,buthewasstartingtogetdamned
desperate.Noinformationseemedtosurfaceabouthissister.HeneededtohelpCaroline,neededto
knowshewassafe,beforehecouldpossiblymovebacktoNewYork.
InsteadheseemedtobegettingmoreandmoreembroiledinEastwick—whichhesworehe’dnever
do.
Halfwaydownthestreet,hepulledofftodialEmmaagain.
Stillnoanswer.Thatdidn’tmeanshewasn’tthere,ofcourse.Shecouldhaveturnedofftheringer,
simplybecauseshehadabusyday.Henowhadagoodideahowbusyshereallywas,howcrowded
herlifewas.
Still,hewantedtohearhervoice.Wantedtotalktoher.
Wantedtoknowshewasokayaftermakinglove.
Wantedtoknowhowhewasgoingtoreactafterhearinghervoiceagain.
Garretttoldhimselfhewasjustfrustratedhehadn’treachedher,notworried.Onewayoranother,
hewasdeterminedtocontacthertoday,though,evenifhehadtotrackherdownallthewayto
Timbuktu.
Moreimmediately,though,seeinghissisterhadtobehisfirstpriority.Carolinewasgettingsprung
fromthehospital—againsthisbetterjudgment.
Hefoundherstillinherhospitalroombutsittingup,alldressedandchompingatthebit.“Yousaid
you’dbeherebythree!”
“Andit’saquarterto.”
“Iknow,Iknow.ButIstartedtoworrythatyouwouldn’tcome.Ijustwanttogohome,Gar.”She
wrappedherarmsaroundhisneckforahugandpromptlystartedcrying.Hellanddoublehell.She
feltskinnierthanareed,andhehateditwhenhissistercried.Healwayswantedtofixtheproblem.
Rightnow.Yesterday.
“Wouldyouquitit?”Aguycouldtalktohissisterthatway.Whenshedidn’timmediatelyquit—
Carolinehadneverlistenedtohim—hepattedherback,overandover.Andover.
Finallyshequitsnufflingandsteppedaway.Hehandedheratissue—sheneverhadone.“Getme
outofhere,”shebeggedhim.
“Iwill.Butyouhavetodothewheelchairthing.”
“That’sstupid.I’mnotsick.”
Butherspiritwassick.Hecouldseethedarknessbehindhereyes,inthenervouswayshemoved,
intheexhaustioninherposture—evenwhenhewaswheelingherdownstairsandbundlingher—and
fivemillionflowers—intothecar.
“Griff’sduehometomorrow,”shetoldhim.
“Iknow.Theparentstoldme,”
“Idon’twanthimtoknow…aboutthesuicideattempt.”
Atleastshewasusingthewordnow.“Caroline,comeon.YousurelyrealizethatMomandDad
alreadytoldhim.Theyhadtogivehimareasontocancelhistripandflyhome.”
“ButIdidn’twanthimtodothat!Andtheyshouldhaveaskedmebeforecallinghim!”
Garrettdidn’ttryarguingwithher.Thesubjectwastoostickytobeginwith.Truthfully,their
parentshadn’taskedGrifftocomehomefortheirdaughter ’ssakesomuchasthey’dhopedGriff
woulddosomethingaboutCarolinetostopallthetalk.GodforbidanyoneinEastwickshould
discoverthatKeatingshadtroublesjustlikeeveryoneelse.
“Thethingis,IwantGrifftohearaboutthisfromme.Beforehehearsitfromstrangersorthe
Eastwickgossipmongers—Waitaminute.Who’sthatwoman?What’sgoingon?”
“Thatwoman,”Garrettsaid,“isGloria.”Astheywalkedthroughhissister ’sfrontdoor,Garrett
bracedfortroubleasheintroducedhissistertothewomanhe’dhired.Gloriawasdressedtolook
likeahousekeeper,butessentiallyGarretthadhiredherassecurityuntilCaroline’shusbandactually
arrivedhomeandtookcharge.
NomatterwhatCarolinesaidorthought,therewasnowayhewasleavingheralone.Notaftera
suicideattempt.Period.AsfarasGarrettwasconcerned,thatwastheendoftheargument—butahalf
hourlater,Carolinewasstillgivinghimgrief.
Bythenhe’dinstalledheronthecouchinthedenwiththeremote,acupofteaandafrantically
lonesomebichonfrisewiththeghastlynameofBubbles.Garrettdisappearedfromsightforafew
minuteswhileCarolineandGloriastartedtalking,givingthemachancetogettoknoweachother.
Ashewanderedaround,herememberedhowmuchhe’dalwayslovedCaro’splace.Shelovedrich,
deepcolors—burgundiesandemeraldsandteals.Shealwayschosefurnitureaguycouldsinkinto,
madethingscomfortable.Heneverhadtokickoffhisshoes,neverhadtofretifhewasgoingtospill
anything.Shewasflexibleinsomanyways,butman,whensheplayedthestubborncard,itwasdamn
hardtobudgeher.
Whenhehadheraloneinthedenagain,thesamefightstartedup—butthistimeGarrettduginhis
heels.“Look,Griff’scominghome,whichmeansyou’reoutoftime,kiddo.It’sgottocomeout,
whateverthehelltroubleyou’rein.Sooutwithit—andthistimeImeanit.I’mnotleavinguntilyou
talk.”
Sheshookherhead,thetearsalreadywellingup.Hercryingmadehimfeellowerthanmud.“Caro.
Thisisstupid.Whatcouldyoupossiblyhavedonetofeelsoguilty?”
Herackedhisbrainforthekindofshamefulthingthatwassobigshecouldn’ttellhim.“A
gamblingaddiction,somethinglikethat?”
“Forheaven’ssake.Ofcoursenot.”
Hefrowned.“Couldyouhavestolensomething—?”
“Oh,forGod’ssake,Garrett.YouknowI’dneverdothat.”Finallyhepesteredherenoughthatshe
cameoutwithit,althoughhertonehadloweredtothemostpainfulofwhispers.“Ihadanaffair.”
Hesankdownontheottomannexttoher,relievedtofinallyhavethesecretoutintheopen.“Okay.
That’slousy.AboutthelastthingI’dexpectyoutodo,knowinghowstronglyyoufeelaboutfidelity.
Butallthesame…Istilldon’tunderstandhowyougetfromamistaketofeelingdriventoasuicide
attempt.”
Hereyesstartedglisteningagain.“BecauseI’minlovewithGriff.Myownhusband.Howcrazyis
that?”
GarrettwishedEmmawerehere.She’dknowhowtohandleaconversationlikethis.Hesureashell
didn’t.AndnowthatCarolinehadturnedonthefaucet,shefinallywillinglyspilledmore.They’dhad
troubleintheirmarriage,whichGarrettalreadyknew.Butthey’dmendedthebreach.Andnowthey
werelikenewlywedsagain.Inlove.Deliriouslyhappy.
“Iwouldnevercheatonhimnow,Garrett.Butatthetime,Ithoughtwewereseparated.Fighting.I
wascertainwewereheadedfordivorcecourt.Itwasstillastupidthingtodo,sleepingwithsomeone
Ibarelyknew,but—”
Garrettdidn’tneedanymoredetails.“Sothiswaswhenyoutwowereseparated—”
“Exactly.ButifGrifffindsout…”Sheshookherhead.“Iknowhowhe’llfeel.Everythingwe’ve
builtbackupwillbedestroyed.We’rebothtryinghard,andit’sworking.Butifthere’satrustissue
likethat,IknowI’lllosehim.”Outpouredthetearsagain.
“Waitaminute,waitaminute,”Garrettsaid.“Whydoesheeverhavetoknow?”
Andthen,finally,camethecruxofthecrisis.“BecauseI’mbeingblackmailed.That’swhyItook
thepills.BecauseIcan’tkeeppaying.AndIcan’tletGriffknow.Sothere’snowayoutofthis,
Garrett.”
Shocklockedhistongue—butonlyforasecond.“Thehellthereisn’t.Who’sblackmailingyou?
Who,Caroline?”
Sheeitherdidn’tknoworshewouldn’tsay.Garrettwantedtofocustotallyontheblackmailerbut
realizeddamnfastthatthatwasn’tanoption.Rightnowhissister ’sfrailmentalstatewasmore
important.
“Caro,”hetriedtotellher,“Griffknowsyou.Heknowsyourbackground.Ourparentswerehardly
rolemodelsforalovingrelationshiporamarriage,now,werethey?IthinkGriffwillunderstand.He
sureashellwon’tlikeit.Butifheknowsyouatall…ifhelovesyouanywayitmatters…it’llbeall
right.”
Sheseemedcalmeddownbeforeheleft.Butbythetimehewaswalkingbacktohiscar,thesunwas
dippinginthewest,ashiverybreezechillingtheair.
Itwastrue,whathe’dsaidtoCaro.Theirparentshadbeenrottenrolemodels.NeitherhenorCaro
hadfeltlovedorprotectedaskids.Theirparentsweredevotedtoeachotheronthesurface,buttheir
valueswerealltangledupwithinfluenceandaffluenceandwhatothersthoughtofthem.Itwasn’tthe
kindofloveGarretthadeverwanted—infact,he’dalwaysassociatedmarriagewithamorepainful
lonelinessthanbeingalone.
Hedidn’tknowthathadchangeduntilcominghome.UntilreunitedwithEmma.Untilbeingwith
Emma,reallybeingwithherlikelastnight.
Throughallthestressesandstrainsoftheday,ahandfulofmaybeskeptwhisperinginhismind.
Maybehecouldbemorethanamoneymakingmachine.Maybehecouldhaveaprivatelife,be
successfulinarelationship,createadifferentkindofmarriage…withtherightwoman.
Itwascrazytohope,butthereitwas.BeingwithEmmahadputtheseedinhismind,hisheart,and
damnedifhecouldstopitfromgrowing.
Theinstanthegotbehindthewheelandstartedtheengine,hedialedhercellphoneagain.This
time,finally,hecaughtupwithher.
Hedidn’twastetimeongreetingsorchitchat.Justsaidswiftly,“ThankGodIfinallyreachedyou.
I’llbethereintenminutes,fifteenmax,Emma.”
Andthenheshotoutofhissister ’sdrivewayandintothenight.
Nine
GarrettturnedthecornertowardColorandfelthisstomachdrop.Althoughitwasn’tthatlateinthe
evening,heassumedthegallerywouldbeclosedandhe’dbeabletocatchEmmaalone.Instead,every
lightintheplaceseemedtobeblazing.
Ashestrodeupthewalk,itwasprettydamnobvioustherewassomekindofmajoreventgoingon.
Whenhepushedopenthefrontdoor,hesufferedanimmediateguypanicattack.
Thegallerylobbywaspackedwithwomen,mostofthemdressedupandexuberantlywaving
aroundwineglasses.Thescentsofheavy,expensiveperfumeswereenoughtochokeaguy.Afewsaid
hello,butmostweretoointentontheirgabfesttopayanyattentiontoanintrudingmale—whichwas
finebyGarrett.
Initiallyhecouldn’tfigureoutwhatthebigto-dowasabout,butoncehethreadedpasttheclutchof
hard-coredrinkersatthewinetable,hecouldseethegallerywashostingsomekindofperfume
display.Atleast,therewereoldperfumebottlesallthroughthefrontparlorandlobby.
Hedebatedescaping—Emmaobviouslyneededhimaroundrightnowlikesheneededaholeinthe
head.Butthiscouldn’tlastforever.Itwasnearlynine,andthegallerynormallyclosedateight.
Besideswhich,Emmahadtobedeadonherfeetafteryesterday’sincrediblylonghours,sohe
figuredshecouldusesomeTLCwhenthisshindigwasfinallyover.
Hestuckhishandsinhispockets,easedasfarawayaspossibleandfeignedinterestintheperfume-
bottledisplays.Afterafewminutes,hedidn’thavetofakeit.
Hejustcheckedoutafew.ArdenBlueGrass,1934.MyonCoeurdeFemme,1928.GabillaLa
Violette,1912.LavinL’Ame,1928.
Thepricetagsmadehimwonderwhyhebotheredwithinvestmentbankingwhenabunchofold
bottleswereworthsomuch.Asfarasartwent,helikedfingerpaintingmore—butclearlythat
opinionwasintheminorityinthiscrowd.Heambledfarther,justlookingandpokingaround,untilhe
finallyspottedEmma.
Damn,butasinglelookandhisthroatwentwhiskey-dry.
Howshecouldstillbeonherfeetandlookingthisgoodconfoundedhim,butshewasatenderfeast
forhiseyes.Sheworealongskirt,somefabricwithasheen,claretincolorwithsomegold-threaded
designneartheankles.Hedidn’tnormallynoticestufflikethat,butsomehowwithher,hefound
himselfnoticingeverything,becauseeverydetailwassomuchapartofher.Thewhiteblousewas
simple,billowy,openatthethroattoshowoffatriplestrandofpinkpearls.She’dleftherhairloose,
justbrusheditbackwithapearledclipononeside.She’dsmudgedalittlesatinystuffaroundher
eyes,usedaripeplumcoloronhermouth.Ifshewasgoingforapeasanteffect,itsurefailed.Shenot
onlylookedbeautifulandstrikingbutalsoeleganttothebone.
Inthefewminuteshe’dwanderedaround,he’dfiguredoutsomethings.Notjustthatoldperfume
bottlessoldwell.ButalsothatthecrowdwasbuzzinglessabouttheeventthanaboutReed.
Sothevultureshadcometopeckaboutthebrokenengagement—atleastwhenEmmawasoutof
sight.Thenexttimesheambledthroughthelobby,shespottedhimimmediately.
Thelookinhereyesputahushinhispulse.Shesurgedtowardhimasifthrilledtoseehim…but
thenhesawherswallowandnoticedherposturetensewithanxiety.
Somethingwaswrong.Verywrong.Butbeforetheycouldconnect,shewasdistractedbyJosh,who
wasapparentlyleavingforthenight.Andthenaphonecallsnaggedherattention.Onewayor
another,itseemedasifeveryonewantedapieceofher.
He’dbeeninsuchahotrushtotellheraboutCaroline.Stillwas.Stillwantedherperspectiveonthe
wholeblackmailermysteryassoonashecouldgetit.
He’dbeeninanevenhotterrushjusttoseeher.Totouchher.Tofindoutiflastnighthadbeenas
powerful—andterrifying—forherasithadbeenforhim.
Butittookanothertwentyminutesbeforeshe’dmanagedtoshoothelastEastwickmatrondownthe
frontsteps.Bythen,he’dhadmoretimetostudyher,moretimetoseethestrainonherfaceandto
catchthetrembleinherfingers.Emmawasn’tjusttired.Shewashidingitwell,butclearlyshewas
stressed,onlyfunctioningbecauseshewastoostubborntocrash.Itwasn’thardtoguessthatthe
breakupwithReedhadspreadthroughthetownfasterthanantsatapicnic.Sheprobablyhadn’thadan
instant’speaceallday.
Thegalleryechoedwithanoddsenseofstillness.Garrettfelthissmilehesitate,anuneasiness
pluckhisheartbeat.Shejustlookedathimwhenshelockedthedoor.Hesawherhungertoseehim…
buthealsosawevenmoreanxietyinherface.
Itwasokay,hewantedtotellher.He’dhelpherweatherthegossipaboutherex.Butrightthenshe
seemedstrungtootighttotalk.Asfarashecouldtell,shedidn’tneedmorestressorseriousness
rightnow.Shejustplainneededabreak.Sohekeptitlight.
“Ihaven’tbeenthisscaredinalongtime,”hesaidwryly.“Ithoughttheyweregoingtoriotovera
fewofthosebottles.Ifyoumentionedyouhadabigeventgoingontonight,itreallyslippedmy
mind.”
“Ididn’tmentionitbecauseitwasn’tsupposedtobeabigevent.There’sahard-coreperfume-
bottle-collectorcrowdinEastwick,soIjustdothiseveryfewmonths.Tobehonest,I’dallbut
forgottenitwasscheduledbecausenormallyitdoesn’ttakemuchtoprepareforit.”
“Ah.Theyjustwantedtodrinkyourwineandgetalookatyoubecauseofthebroken
engagement?”
“Don’tfeeltoosorryforme.Oneofthosebottlessoldfortwohundredandseventy-fivethousand
dollars.Itwasaconsignmentdeal,butstill.I’llgetmycut.”
“DidIhearyouright?Oneofthoseold,usedbottlesactuallywentfor275K?”
Whenshenodded,hemimickedamansufferingfromshockandgaspingforair.Thoughshe
obviouslywasnotinalaughingmood,herlipstippedandahelplesschuckleemerged.Finallythat
terriblestiffnesseasedinhershoulders.
“Oh,Garrett,darnit,I’veneededtotalktoyouallday,butit’sbeenonethingafteranother.WhenI
finallygotafreeminutethisafternoon,thisgalleryeventexplodedonme.ButIhavesomethingI
absolutelyneedtotellyou—”
“AndIwanttohearit.Butnothere,Emma.”Hetriedtosteerhertowardthedoor,butshebalked.
“What’swrongwithhere?”
“Nothing,normally.Butrightnowyourwholegallerysmellslikeaperfumefactory.Infact,Ithink
theperfume’sdestroyedalltheoxygenintheentirecounty.”
Shechuckledagainbutstillwouldn’tbudge.“It’snotthatIdon’twanttodisappearwithyou—butI
can’tleavethismess.”
Ofcourseshecouldn’t,hethought.Shecouldhardlyopenthegalleryinthemorningwith
wineglassesandbottlesallovertheplace.
Garrettrealized,nottoocomfortably,thathewascompletelyunusedtothinkingofotherpeople,
theirneeds,theirlifedetails.
Buthewantedtochangethat.Whileshegatheredandlockedupallthefragilebottles,heheadedfor
thekitchen.Tacklingthedirtyglassesandpartydebriswaseasyenough.He’dneverlikedKP—who
did?—buthefoundhimselfwhistlingashethreadedtheglassesinthedishwasher.
Helpingherfeltnatural.Evenmoreshockingwasdiscoveringthatbeinghimselfwithherfelt
natural.Who’dhavebelievedit?ThatEmmaseemedtojustlikebeingwithhim.Thatfingerpainting
withherasifhewerealittlekidhadactuallybeenfun.Andsex,ofcourse,hadbeenbeyondgreat…
butcomingalivewithheralsoneverhadtheperformanceissuesthatsexandlifealwaysdid.
Somehow,herealized,hejustfeltrightwithher.
Sheshowedupinthekitchenandgrabbedadishtowel.
“Maybeit’sassimpleastrust,”hemused.
“Huh?”
“It’sameanerworldthanitusedtobe.Noteasytotrust.Noteasytofindotherpeoplewithintegrity.
AndIadmit,it’sprobablyalwaysbeenharderformetotakeachance.”
“Okay,”shesaidpatiently,“you’veobviouslybeensamplingthewinewhileyouhandledthe
glasses—”
Hekissedheronthenose,teasedthedishtoweloutofherhandandthistimeseriouslywhiskedher
towardthedoor.Thecleanupwasninety-ninepercentdone.Enough.“You,cookie,havehadmore
thanyourshareofnonstoprunningtoday.Let’sgetyouawayfromthegalleryandphonesandseeif
wecanfindsomefoodtoshovelintoyou,okay?”
“Cookie?”
“Iknow,Iknow.Ican’timaginewhyIcalledyoucookie,either.Imustbeoutofmyhead.Infact,I
knowIam.Ithinkoveryou.”Hesaiditlightly,soasnottoscarethecompletehelloutofher.And
althoughsheshothimastartledlook,bythenhewasswitchingoffthelastofthelights,swingingthe
doorclosedandthenhookinganarmoverhershoulder—becausethenightairwascolderthanawell
digger ’sankle.
“Youlookgorgeous,”hesaid.
“Okay.Nomorewineforyou.Maybeever.”
Itfeltgood.Morethangood.Gettinghersmiling,laughing,easingup.Andshewaswaytoo
whippedtogivehimmuchtroublebythen.Heeasilybossedheraroundathisplace,gotherinstalled
onthecouchwithapillowbehindherback.Withinminutes,he’dhandedherafancysandwichheaped
withcheeseandfreshtomatoesandcoldcuts,allspillingoutthesidesandmakingherchuckleagain.
Theglass,thepillow,theplatethesandwichwasonwereallhers—thingsshe’dbroughtovertomake
thisrentalplacelivable.
Butshewastheonewhomadeitlivable.Curleduponthatoldcouch,shebroughtlifeandemotion
totheplace.Still,everyfewminutesshekeptrememberingtherefraintoherearliersong,andthen
hergoodhumorwoulddieagain.
“Garrett…Ireallydoneedtotellyousomething.”
“Iknowyoudo.Youkeepsaying.AndIwanttohear.Butfirstexplaintomehoworwhyanyone
wouldpaysomuchforabunchofusedperfumebottles.”Beforehesettleddownwithher,heturned
offthephone,thefax,alltheelectronicsthatheusuallykepton24-7.
“I’mnotsureIcanexplain.Perfumebottlecollectingiskindofauniqueaddiction,butifyou’renot
intoit—”
“Trustme.I’mnot.Andlikelywon’tbe.”
Shechuckledagain.“Poorbaby.Thosewomenreallyscaredyou,didn’tthey?Youneversaw
womeninashoppingfrenzybefore?”
Attheendofthecouch,hepulledoffoneofhersandals.Thentheother.“Notthatclosebefore.”He
shuddered.“Iwouldn’twanttogetbetweenoneofthosewomenandthebottlestheywanted.”
“It’salostworldnow,buttherewasatimewhenperfumeshadartistshandmakebottlesfortheir
product.Onceperfumersstartedusingplastic-tippedstoppers,thebottleswereneverthesame.But
beforethat,thereallygreatperfumesallhadbottlesthatwerehanddesigned,trulyworksofart—”
Sheseemedtohearherselftalking—ormaybeshesuddenlyrealizedhewasrunninghishandsupand
downthesolesofherbarefeet.Herthroatsuddenlyflushedwithawareness,arousal.Hereyesducked
fromhis,andsheswiftlyswungherlegsoverthesideofthecouchandstoodup.
“Iknowwhatyou’rethinking—”shebegan.
“Whatgaveitaway?IwastryingmydamnedesttomakeyoubelieveIwasfascinatedaboutthe
bottles.”
Butthistimeshedidn’tsmile.“Garrett…Ireallyneedtogetsomethingoffmychest.”
Thehellshedid.She’dhadenoughstressandcrapoverthelasttwenty-fourhourstolastalifetime.
Andallhehadtodowasgentlytugherhandsandshepromptlyfoldedintohisarms.Shewasn’tthat
small,butbarefootnow,shehadtotiltherheadbacktogetkissed.Atleasttogetkissedtherightway
—wherehetookhermouthandkeptit.Possessedit.Seducedit.Untilhisheadwasreelingandshe
wasbreathless.
Whenheletherupforair,herluminouseyesmethisandshestartedtospeak…ortriedto.
Sohehadtokissheragain,muchmoreseriously.
He’dbeenwithoutherallday.Toolong.Athirty-five-year-oldmanshouldhavehadyearsof
experiencewithwomentolearnself-control,buthedidn’t.Hehadmoreself-controlthananytwenty
menhe’devermet.Butnottheexperiencewithwomen.
Atleastnotwithwomenhetrusteddowndeep.Maybeheshouldhaverealizedhowmuchshe
matteredwhentheywereteenagers…butfordamnsure,heknewhowmuchshemeanttohimnow.
Hisheadspunashekissedandkissedandkissedheryetagain.Hetookacherishingnipfromher
neck.Thenherearlobe.Thenindulgedinalong,slow,tongue-stealingkiss,afterwhichhetastedthe
exquisitelysoftlengthofherthroat.
Hell,ifshehadn’tmadeafiercegroaningsoundofsurrender,heprobablycouldhave
experimentedwithathousandmorekissesjustonherfaceandneckalone.
ExploringEmmawasthemostfascinatingjobhe’devercomeacross…althoughGarrett
discoveredthatundoingEmmawasanevenmoreconsumingoccupation.
Thepearlclipinherhairhadtobejettisonedfirst,becauseheneededtobeabletofreelyrunhis
handsthroughherthick,lustroushair.Thebettertoholdher.Thebettertokissherthoroughly.The
bettertoexplorethesensationofherhairslidingthroughhisfingers.
Assoftasthetextureofhersilkyblousewas,herskinbeneathitwasathousandtimessofter.He
sufferedtheshockofdiscoveringthewickedwomanwaswearingnobrabeneathit.Imagine.His
elegantnever-break-a-ruleEmmafailingtowearabra,andforthathedidhisbesttorewardher.
Sheseemedtoappreciatehistribute,becausethetipshardenedandthesoftwhitefleshswelledand
tightenedunderthecupofhislips,underthewashofhistongue,underthecaressofhispalm.She
suckedinbreathafterbreath.Herhandsbythenwerebusy,too,pullingatanyclothesshecouldreach,
athisshirt,thebuttons.
Heavenknew,hewantedhisclothesoff,too,preferablyfasterthanyesterday,buthewas
determinedtoholdontosomecontrol.Hehadn’tevengottenherintothebedroomyet.Thesoft
mattress,thedarkness,wasonlyaroomaway.
She’dhadatraumaticday,andherexstillhadtobeonhermind.Beforemakinglove,hedidn’t
wantanythingonhermind—buthim.Andthem.Andwhattheybroughteachother.
Notthataguycouldn’tteasehisladybeforegoingfortheendrun.Heslippedtheblouseoffher,
whoosheditontoachair,carefullyunclippedeachearring,kissingeachearatthesametime,then
strippedoffherringsandwristbangles.Thosetookmorekisses,moretime.Sheseemedimpatientas
ifshewantedhimtorush.
Shemadehimrush,allright.Thebloodseemedtobeshootinginhisveins,startingwithhishead,
aimingstraightbelowhisbelt.Somethingwasweirdaboutherskirt.Nosnap.Nobutton.Finallyhe
gotit,thattheskirthadsometypeoffancyclasp—trickyandconfusingforbighandstofigureout,so
itwasadamngoodthinghewasinspired.
Thelongclaretskirtfellinaswishtoherbarefeet.
Thentheonlythingsheworewerewhiteunderpants—atleasthethoughttheteensyscrapoflace
wasunderpants.And,ofcourse,thetriplestrandofpinkpearlstryingtohidebetweenherbreasts.
Thelacewentfirst.Butthatwasasgoodashewascapableofbeing.Hispatienceandcontrolhad
beentootested.
Thepearlswerecomingtobedwiththem.
Herarmswoundtightaroundhisneckwhenheliftedher.Hermouthhadlatchedontohisand
refusedtoletgo.Hecouldn’texactlysee.Notthathedidn’tknowwherethebedwas.Notthathehad
anyintentionofdroppingher.
Notthathegaveadamnwhetherhecouldseeornot.
Hecouldfeel.Her.Feeltheweightofher,thetexturesofher.Thebeautyofher.Smellherhair,her
skin;tasteherbreath,hermouth,herthroat.
Heloweredheronthebed,thenannoyinglyrealizedhewasstillwearingpants—andpartofhis
shirt.Heshuckedboth,thencamebacktoher.Finallytherewasnothingbetweenthembutpearls.Bare
skinrubbedagainstbareskin,hiserectioninspiredtomakeherfeelappreciated.Shekeptmaking
thesesounds,thesesoft,softsoundsofyielding,ofyearning,ofsurrender.
Maybeshewantedtodrivehimmad.Maybeshecould.Maybeshealreadyhad.
Shegavesowillingly.Thatwaswhatgottohimthemost.Sheopenedherarms,herlegs,hertrust
forhim.Asself-containedashe’dalwaysbeen,Emmahadheldherselftighteryet—andneededto.
He’dlearnedtoughness.Shehadn’t.Hecoulddocold.Nother.
Atleastnotnow,withhim.Shewrappedherlegssnugandhigharoundhim,pullinghimintoher,
herpalmsandfingersglidingalloverhim,arms,shoulders,back,wooinghimdeeperintoher…and
thendeeperyet.Thatsensationofslidingintoherwaslikenoneotherintheuniverse.
Hewantedtostaythere,savoringthesensation,foranotherhundredyears.Atleastforanother
second.Buttheneedtoclaimher,topossessher,wasathousandtimesmorepowerful.Garrettcould
haveswornhedidn’thaveasinglecavemanurge…butitseemedhedid.Theneedtomakeherhis
woman,toownheratthatinstant,wasmorecompellingthananyneedforairorwater.Nothingelse
woulddobuthavingher.Then.Rightthen.Fastandhard.
“Love,”shewhisperedhelplessly.
“Ido.Loveyou,”hewhisperedback.
“Loveyou.Loveyou,”shewhispered,anddamnation,butthatdestroyedhislastdropofcontrol.
Theybothrodethatwave,high,fast,sweat-and-heatfast,silver-fast,climbinguntilbothofthemhit
themountainpeakatthesametime.Thenspilledover.
Hecameandcameandcame,asifhehadn’thadanorgasminyears,asifhehadsomefierce
primalneedtofillherupwithhisseed,hislife.Shecalledoutandthencalledoutagain,untilthey
bothfinallysankagainstthepillows,whippedandbreathingroughandhard.
Shelaughedsuddenly,softly,asifshecouldn’tbelievethewild,wickedridethey’djustbeen
throughtogether.Sodidhe,kissingherdampforehead,lovingthefeelingofherinhisarms.
Forafewminuteshewastoobeattomove…notthathewantedto.Buteventuallyherealizedthat
herskinwascoolingandheshifteduponanelbowjusttountangletheblanketandspreaditover
them.Shedidn’tbudgebeyondsnugglinghercheekmoreintentlyintohisshoulder.
Hehadtosmileagain.
She’dalreadyfallenasleep.Hestronglysuspectedthatshe’dsleeplongandhardifhecouldensure
shewasn’tinterrupted.
Ascrazyasitsounded,hefeltasifhislifestartedatthisprecisemoment.Makinglovethenight
beforehadbeenextraordinaryandwonderful…butjustnowshe’dbecomehiswoman.Reallyhis.In
spiteofimpossibleodds,he’dfoundtheonewoman,theonlyone,who’devermadehimbelievein
love.
Godknowsthereweretroublesahead.Hissister.Thecrazinessofhiswork,tryingtoliveintwo
placesrightnow,notbeingsettled.Andthentherewerehisfaults—theworkaholicthing.Theself-
centered,too-focusedthing.Theterrorthathewouldn’tknowhowtolovehertherightway,thathe’d
learnedonlywrongthingsfromhisparents,hislife.
Butdamn,therewastimetosweatallofthat,andtonightwasn’tit.
Rightnowhehadherinhisarms.Allhewanted.Allthatcouldpossiblymatter.
Ten
Emmakepthavingthestrangestdream—sheknewithadtobeadreambecauseshewasnaked
exceptforastringofpearls.
Thedreamwastheoppositeofanightmare.Shewaswalkingoutofanuglytunnel—adarkplace
wheresheknewshe’dbeentrappedandanxiousandneverabletoseesunlight.Yetinthedream,the
answerwassosimple.Shefollowedthepathoutofthetunnelintoanotherworld,abeautifulworld,
whereaspensshiveredinthewind,revealingleavesofrealgold.Thesunbatheddownwarmthbut
wasneversohotastoburn.
Shefeltstrongandhappyandloved….
Andthenshesuddenlyopenedhereyes.Garretthadpulledachairnexttothebed,wassittingthere
withamugbetweenhishands,staringintentlyather.“Hey,beauty,”hemurmured.“Iwasstartingto
worry.”
“Worry?”sheaskedgroggily.
“I’vetalkedtoLondontwice.Parisonce.Switzerlandthreetimes.Handledoverfourmillionin
securitiesandinvestments.Hadbreakfast—”
“Goodgrief.Whattimeisit?”
“Takeiteasy.”Aroyalfingerorderedherheadbackdowntothepillow.“It’sonlyeighto’clock.”
“Howcoulditonlybeeight,if—”
“Nobigsweat.Allthoseplacesareonatimezonethatworksearlyinthemorninghere.IfIneedto
callTokyo,it’sawholedifferentstory.”
Thatwasinterestinginformation,shethought.Evenfascinating.Butthecrazythingwasshehoped
he’dkeeponchitchatting.Justlikethis.Foranotherfewtimezonesortwo.Wakinguptohimwas
evenbetterthanthedream.Howcornywasthat?
“NotethatIdidn’tclimbbackintobedwithyou,”Garrettsaid.“ForwhichIthinkyoushouldgive
meatleastseventy-fivebrowniepoints.”
“Because?”
“BecauseIknewyouwereexhausted.Infact,youweresleepingsodeeplythatIkeptcheckingto
makesureyourheartwasstillbeating.”
“That’sthemostcreativeexcuseI’veheardforfeelingagirlup.”
Henoddedsolemnly.“It’sthebestIcouldcomeupwithonamoment’snotice.Butifitwereupto
me,I’dstandguardsoyoucouldsleepallday.Thiskindoftiredisn’tfair,cookie.You’vebeen
carryingtooheavyaload.ButIwasn’tsureifIcouldletyousleepmuchlonger,becauseIdidn’thave
anyideawhatcommitmentsyouhadtodayorwhentheystarted.”
Sheclosedhereyes.“I’vegotaprojectI’minvolvedwithforLilyCartwrightthisafternoon.You
knowLily,don’tyou?ShemarriedJackCartwright,partnerinthatbiglawfirm?AndsinceLily’s
pregnantnow—”Acupofteaseemedtohavemadeitswayintoherhands.Shetookasip,foundit
hot,strong,sweet.Perfect.“She’sbeenfarmingoutprojectswhenevershecanfinda—”
“Sucker.”
“Exactly.Anyway,she’sgotagroupoftroubledkids.Teenagersaboutagethirteenandfourteen.
Notintroublewiththelawyetbutaimingthere—truants,cuttingclass,thatkindofthing.”
“Don’ttellmeyoufingerpaintwiththem,”heteased.
“No.I’mdoingawallwiththem.Amural.Free-form.Notartexactlybutusingcolorsandshapes
thatworkforthem.It’stheirtherapyroom,sothey’recreatingthewholething,fromfloorto
ceiling.”
“Soyougettoworkwithahandfulofornery,belligerent,smart-moutheddefiantteenagersfor—”
Abowlofdewy-freshraspberrieslightlysprinkledwithsugarappearedonherlap.“Acouple
hoursaweek.ButLilyneedsthehelp.Andtheyloveit,Garrett.HowcouldIsayno?”
“Youframeyourmouthlikethis.”Hedemonstrated.“It’sjustaone-syllableword.Youusedtobe
greatatsayingit.Especiallytome.”
Shehadtolaugh.“Thatwasadifferentissue,youdevil.Thekidsaregreattome.They’reno
troubleatall.”
“Ididn’twanttobetroubleforyouwhenwewereteenagerseither.Ijustwantedtogetinyour
pants.”
“Well,sheesh.Thelastcoupledays,I’veletyoudoanythingyouwanted.Youjusthadtowaita
coupleofyearsbeforeIchangedmyvote.”Sheaddedthoughtfully,“Cometothinkofit,Iwasstuck
waitingacoupleofyears,too.”
“Sowhatdoyouthink?Wasthewaitworthit?”
“Itwasmore—more—thanworthit,Mr.Keating.Infact,ifyou’llclimbbackunderthesheetswith
meforacoupleofminutes,Ijustmightshowyouhowworthititwas.ImightevenshowyouwhatI
candowithafreshraspberry.”
“MyGod.Youaretrouble.”Hetookthetea,stasheditonthetableandthendivedforher.
Raspberriesspilledeverywhere.Thebowltippedonthecarpet.Hisarmswentaroundherandhe
kissedher,windingherontopofhim,thenbeneath.Asifallthatteasinghadbeenlotsoffun…butnot
halfasmuchfunastherealityoftouchingher.
Emmahadn’trealizedanyofthosetruthsbefore.Suchaswhenamanneededtotouchhiswoman,
therestoftheworlddidn’tneedtoexist.
Andwhenawomanneededtotouchherman,itwasexactlythesame.
Theytussledandrompedandplayed,untilthefrictionandheatunderthesheetscauseda
spontaneouscombustion.
He’dseducedherwithinfinitepatienceandsensualityandtendernessthenightbefore,butthis
morningwasahot,wildride.
Poweroutagesshouldhaveoccurredfromtheamountofsizzlingbrightlightningbetweenthem.
Eventuallyshecrashedagainstthepillow,allsweaty,aninsanelybeatificsmileonherface,andhe
crashedonhisback,onearmstillthrashedoverher,asdampasshewas,thesamebeatificsmileon
hisface.
Untilhistelephonerang.
Theybothignoredit.Eventuallyitstoppedringing.Garrettneveractedasthoughhe’devenheard
it,neverstoppedlookingatherforevenamoment.
Butthejanglingsoundslappedherbacktoreality.Forhoursshe’dcompletelyforgottentheshock
andpanicofherrealreality.“Garrett,Ineedtotellyousomethingserious.”
“Okay.”
“Itriedtotellyouyesterday.”
“Iknowyoudid.AndInevermeanttocutyouoff,Em.Ijusthonestlythoughtyouneededsome
rest.You’vehadnonstopstress.”
Hecarvedahandaroundhertempleandcheekbone,smoothingawayherdamphair.“Itwasn’thard
tofigureoutwhatyouweregoingthroughyesterday.IknowEastwick.Thewholetownfoundout
aboutyourbrokenengagementandwasonyourbackalldaytogetthedetails.”
“That’strue.Infact,itwasthereasonIcouldn’tgettimetotalktoyouyesterday.Butthat’snotthe
problemIneedtoshare.”Shetookabreath,intentongatheringherthoughts,buthewenton,asif
believingsheneededsoothingandreassuring.
“Reed’sgoingtobeonyourmindforawhile.Youcareforhim,caredforhim.Thetownisn’t
goingtoletyouforgethisnamerightawayevenifyouwantedto.IpromiseI’mnotgoingtoaddto
thatproblemforyou.”
“Ididn’tthinkyouwould—”
Again,heinterrupted.“Ifwecomeoutpubliclyasapairrightnow,thetownwillthinkyouleft
Reedforme.Iknowhowtheyare,believeme.”Clearlyhe’dworriedaboutthekindofissuesshehad
tolivewithinEastwick.“SoIrealizewe’llhavetobediscreetforawhile.ButIcan’timagineeither
ofuswantingtobeanythingbutdiscreetanyway.”
“That’strue.”Shehadn’teventhoughtthatfarahead.Garrettobviouslyhad.Whensheduckedher
head,though,hisknucklesgentlychuckedupherchinsotheireyesweremeetingagain.
“Emma.I’minlovewithyou.It’sanewfeelingforme.Terrifyingandterrorizing.ButIknowthis
isright.”
Alumpfilledherthroat.Alumpbothofjoyanddread.“Ineverexpectedtofeelanythinglikethis,
either.Itwasgoodwhenwewerekids,Gar.ButnothinglikewhatIfeelforyounow.”
Henodded.“Still,wecantakethisasslowasyouwant.Idon’tknowhowtodothiscourtshipthing.
SoI’llhavetolearn.Iwanttodoitright.Iadmit,I’maslowdeveloper,buthonesttoPete,I’vegota
decentIQ.Soifyou’lljustbepatientandnotfreakoutifIdosomethingwrongnowandthen—”
Shesatup,shookupnow.“Garrett.”
“What?”
“Hush.”
“Okay.”
“Somethinghappenedyesterday.Myparents—Iknewtheywantedtoseeme.Iknewtheywanted
answersaboutwhyI’dbrokentheengagementtoReed,soIwentthere.”Shesighed,thenjustblurted
itout.“IfoundoutI’mgoingtoloseeverything.”
“Losewhat?Whatdoyoumean?”
God.Itwassogoodtotalktosomeonewhowasn’tgoingtoheapjudgmentsonherhead,who
wasn’tsoclosetoEastwicksocietythathe’dbeinfluencedbyanythingbeyond…well,beyondher.
“Allthistime,Garrett,IthoughtIhadatrustfund,setupbymygrandmother,thatI’dinheritwhenI
wasthirty.”
“Okay.”
“It’shefty.Severalmilliondollars.”
“So.That’sgreat.”
“Thethingis,knowingaboutthetrustfundalwaysaffectedhowandwhyIlivethewayIdo.Ilove
mygallery,butIalwayschosewhattodisplay,whattosell,notbasedonaprofitbutonwhatIwanted
togivetothecommunity.ItriedtopickwhatIthoughtwasbeautiful.WhatIthoughtaddedtousall.
Notjustwhatwouldbringmeinthemortgagepayment.”
Garrettdidn’tinterruptherthistime,onlylistened.Butshecaughtthefaintestsmile—not
patronizingbutgentle.Whenhetouchedhercheek,shecouldalmostseetheopinioninhismind—
thatshewasahopelessidealist.Andthathelikedthequalityinher.
“It’snotjustthatgallery.ButallthevolunteerworkIdo.TheprojectsItakeonatthecountryclub
aremoreaboutmyparentsthanme.Likewise,thehostesschoresIdoformydad.ButwhatIdofor
thekids—I’vealwaysvolunteeredalotofhoursbecauseIneverhadtoworryaboutincome,you
know?IalwaysknewIhadthistidylittlefortunecomingin.”
“Prettyobviously,”hesaidquietly,“thatchanged.Somehow.”
Shesatup,noddedvigorously,wishingshecouldshakethelumpfromherthroat.“Whatmy
parentsnevertoldme—untilyesterday—wasthatIhadtobemarriedbytheageofthirtytoinherit
thatmoney.”
“Saywhat?”Thesuddencreaseonhisforeheadregisteredhisconfusion.Hesatup,takingan
immediatelymoreseriousposture.Itstoppedbeingasnuggle-on-the-pillowconversationoncehe
realizedshehadaseriousproblem.
Orthat’swhatshethoughtwashappening.Shesatup,too,reachedforalong-sleevedshirtofhis.
Shedidn’tmindbeingnakedwithhim.Infact,forthefirsttimeinherlifeshefeltfreetobeherselfin
everyway.Butthesubjectwassotroublingthatshecouldfeelaheartchillsettlingin.
Theybothendedupinhistinykitchen.Shecurledupinachairwithafreshmugoftea.Heleaned
againstthecounter,lookingoddlydistant—probablybecausethesunwasbehindhimatthewindow,
andhisfacelookedmoreaustereandshadowed.“Idon’tunderstand.Whywouldyourgrandmother
havesetupthetrustthatway?”
“Itseemsthatmygrandmother—aswellasmyparents—heardmetalkagainstgettingmarried
fromthetimeIwaslittle.Tobehonest,myparent’smarriagewasenoughtoscareanyoneawayfrom
theinstitution.AnditjustseemedsomanymarriagesinEastwickwereaboutmoney.Mergers.
Conglomerations.Bringingbusinessesanddynastiestogether.”Shesweptbackherhairwithafretful
hand.“Ididn’twantthat.”
“Hell,neitherdidI.”
“Anyway…”Shesipped,willingtheteatostartbracingher.Itfeltgoodtogetthisoutintheopen.
TosharetheproblemwithGarrett.Tohavesomeoneshecouldtell.“Ithinktheideawastoblackmail
meintomarriageandkids.”
“Whichisfine—onlyhowwasthatsupposedtoworkifyoudidn’tknowitwasaconditionofthe
trust?”
Somethinginhisvoicecaughtherattention.Somethingoff.Cool.Butwhensheliftedherheadto
studyhim,hisexpressionjustseemed…neutral.Sheassumedshe’dimaginedthatsuddenoddtone.
“Accordingtomyparents,onceIstartedseeingReedacoupleyearsago,theybelievedwe’dendup
married.Theythoughtthey’dneverhavetotellme.”Sheshookherheadattheblackhumorofitall.
“It’ssoironic,becausetheycouldn’twaittotellmeyesterday.TheywantedmetocallReed
immediately.Makeupwithhim.Theywerevery,verypositiveafewmilliondollarswouldmotivate
metodoanythingtogethimback.”
Garrettfellsilent.
Shedidn’tknowwhatsheexpectedhimtosay.Nothing,really.Onlyhissilenceseemedtostretch
outforanoddlengthoftime.Maybeitwasjusttoomuchtotakeinatonetime,shethought.Butthen
heasked,“Whenisyourthirtiethbirthday?”
“Augustthirty-first.”
“SoletmeseeifI’vegotthisright.Ifyou’renotmarriedbeforeAugustthirty-first,youlosethose
millions?”
“Idon’tactuallyknowhowmuchitis.Itwasthreemillionwhenmygrandmotherestablishedthe
trust.Butyouknowhowmoneywellinvestedcanaddup.”Shesqueezedhereyesclosedforaminute.
“I’mhavingthehardesttimejust…graspingit.Notthelossofthemoneysomuch.ButhowI’mnow
facingquiteadisasterbecauseIsototallytookthatinheritanceforgranted.Ineversaved,never
questionedmyfinancialchoices.SpenttoomuchoncarsandclothesandanythingelseIwanted.And
nowit’sashock.Notjusttogiveupmygallerybutnottobeabletodoallthevolunteerworkwith
kids—”
Garrettturnedaround,plunkedhismugdownonthecounterhardenoughtomakeaslapping
sound.“Iguesstheanswertothatiseasyenough.”
“Pardon?”
“Allyouhavetodoismarrybeforeyou’rethirty,right?Reedwasn’trightforyou,butit’snotlike
hewasyouronlychoice.Youhadmehookedbeforeyoukickedhimoutoftherunning.”
“Pardon?”shesaidagain,thistimemoresoftly.
“I’llmarryyou,Emma.Ifyouwantthatmoney,it’syours.Nobigsweat.”
Hisvoicewasascoolasacucumberonahotsummerday.Drippingcool.Tangycool.Whenshe
didn’timmediatelyrespond—atthatpreciseinstant,shecouldn’tgethertonguetoformawordifher
lifehaddependedonit—hesaid,“I’mnoidealistaboutmoney.It’snotprettyorromantictobepoor.
There’snoreasontobeembarrassedaboutwantingtolivewell.Noonethrowsawayafortune,
Emma,it’sstupid.You’dbecrazytothrowawayyourindependence,yoursecurity.Besides,why
wouldyouwanttodothat?”
Fromonesecondtothenext,shefeltasifshe’dagedhalfacentury,becauseshestooduponshaky
kneesandhaltingbalance.“Iwasn’taskingyoutomarryme,”shesaidquietly.
“Iknowthat.Butit’saperfectlyreasonablesolutiontoyourproblem.Godknowswegetalong
betweenthesheets.Alwaysdidhaveaclicktogether—”Hisphonerang.Atthesametime,hisfax
startedexuberantlyfrothingoutwavesofpaper.Hesteppedtowardthephonebutsaidtoherfirst,“No
reasoninhellwecan’tbemarriedbeforeyourbirthday.”
Ashewalkedacrosstheroom,tookhisbusinesscall,foragoodsixtysecondsshefoughtforcalm.
Shefeltasifsomeonehadpunchedherinthestomach.Shecouldn’tseemtorecover.
Sheevenwantedtolaugh.Forthefirsttimeinherentirelifeshereallydidwantamarriage
proposal.ThebiggestdreamherhearteverhadwasaproposalspecificallyfromGarrett.
Butnotlikethis.
Notbecausehethoughtshe’dmarryhimformoney.
Thefunniest,saddestpartofitwasthatEmmahadthought—she’dreally,reallythought—that
Garrettcaredforher.Evenlovedher.Thatheknewher,therealEmma,theEmmasherarelyshowed
toanyone,andthatthatwasthewomanhe’dtakentobed.Andmaybeevenfalleninlovewith.Atleast,
he’dsaidhelovedher.
Butthat,ofcourse,wasunderthecovers.
Nowsheknewbetter.
Hewasstillonthephone,stilltalking—inFrenchshethought,withoutreallyregisteringwhathe
wassaying.Butthen,shewasn’tregisteringwhatshewasdoingeither.Takingstepslikea
sleepwalker,shestrodebarefoottowardthedoor,wearinghisshirt,herhairnotbrushed,herclothes
andshoesstillsomewherearoundhisplace—probablystrewneverywhichway.
Shecouldn’tremembereverdoinganythingimproperinpublic.
Itwasn’tthatshecaredsomuchwhatothersthoughtofherbutthatsheneverwillinglyexposed
herselfthatway.YetshewalkedouthisdooranddownthesidewalktowardColordressedlikethat.
Orundressedlikethat,dependingonone’spointofview.
Rightthen,shedidn’tseemtohaveapointofview.ShejusthadtogetoutofGarrett’spresence
beforethatpunchinthegutcaughtupwithher.Thepainwasgoingtohitgood.Sheknewit.Butshe
didn’twanthimoranyonetoseeit.
AllEmmawantedwastohideoutandlickherwoundsinprivate,butlifejustrefusedtocooperate.
Shecouldn’tletdowntheteenagersfortheafternoonmuralproject.Thegallerystillhadtobeopened
andoperated.Hertelephoneneverstoppedringing,andalthoughshecouldhaveturnedoffthedarn
thing,thatonlyavoidedproblemsratherthansolvedthem.Unlessshefacedpeopleandspoketothem,
peoplecouldwellbelievethatReedwasresponsiblefortheirengagementbreakup—especiallysince
themanhadapparentlydisappearedfromsight—anditwasn’trighthavingpeopleblamehim.Andon
topofallthat,shehadadozenpreweddingplansthatneededimmediatecanceling.
SoshesuckeditupanddidthedayandtriedherhardesttokeephermindoffGarrett.Butbylate
afternoonshe’dhadit.Maybeyoucouldglueacrackedeggshellbacktogethertemporarily,butno
waycouldthatglueholdforever.
“Josh,youcanmantheplaceforacouplehours,can’tyou?IknowJeremiahisn’there,butIneed
todisappearintheworkshopforawhile,getsomethingsreadyfortheJulyshow.”
“Sure,Emma.Youwantmetotelleveryoneyou’regonefortheday?”
BlessJosh.Heneveraskedapersonalquestion.Hejustseemedtowantajobwherepeoplelefthim
aloneaboutbeinggay.Insomanyways,shecouldcountonhimfordiscretion.Ithelpedtobeableto
closethedoorontheshopandfocusoncleaningcanvasesandframesandorganizingdisplay
concepts.
Shewasn’tconcentratingwell,couldn’tpretendto,didn’ttry.
Shejustwantedtofilltheday’shoursanddoherdamnedesttowearherselfout.Barelyfifteen
minutespassedbeforetherewasaknockonthedoor,though,anditwasn’tJosh.
MaryDuvallpokedherheadin.“Youremployeesaidyouwerebusyanddidn’twanttobe
interrupted,Emma.”
“It’sallright.”Itwasn’t,butMarywasalreadyinsidenow.Andanyothertime,she’dhavebeen
gladtoseeheroldfriend.
Maryliftedasatchelofcanvasestoexplainwhyshe’dintruded.“Youtoldmetobringsomework
ifIwanteditinyourshow.EspeciallythatIneededtobringitbeforetheendofJune.SoIwasafraid
ifIdidn’tgetaroundtoshowingyouthese,itmightbetoolateforyoutoevenconsiderthem.”
“You’resoright.Comeonin,let’shavealook.”
Marysteppedintentatively,studyingEmma’sfaceasifunsureifshewerereallywelcome.Emma
wantedtoshakeherhead.TheMaryDuvallshe’dknowninschoolhadlotsofbrassattitudeandspunk
—ofcourse,lifeandagechangedeveryone.ButthisMarywaswearingasubdueddenimskirtand
basicblouse,nostyleinsight,andseemedshyerthanawren.
Man,though,herworkwasn’tremotelyshy.AsEmmaslowlyexaminedtheportfolio,shefelt
distractedforthefirsttimeallday.Shesawstrikingcolors.Emotion.Vision.Paintingsthatoffered
somethingfreshandthoughtfulanddeep.
“MyGod.Whydidn’tyougivemestufftodisplaybefore?”Emmascoldedher.
“Youdowantthemthen?”
“Andanythingelseyou’vegot.I’dlovetogiveyouyourownshow,butrightnowthebestIcando
isincludeyouintheJulyprogram.”Shedidn’tsaythatshemaywellneedtoclosethegalleryafter
that.“Afterthat…Idon’tknow,butI’llhelpyoufindplacestodisplaywhateveryouhave,hookyou
upwiththebestdealers.You’rewonderful.”
Theychattedabitlonger.Withoutthinking,EmmainsistedMaryattendthenextDebslunch.Mary
hadbeentoone,butEmmasensedsheneededmorecoaxingtofeelpartoftheEastwickfoldagain.
Thewordscameoutofhermouthsoeasilythatshesuddenlyhadtogulp.
Obviouslysheshouldn’tbeignitingtheoldfriendshiporplayingwelcomingcommitteeto
EastwickforMarywhenshenolongerhadanyideawhereshewasgoingtobeorwhatshewas
goingtodo—andthosedecisionsweregoingtoslapherinthefaceawfullyfast.Maryhadnoreason
toknowaboutherpersonalcrises,butpossiblyherexpressiongavesomethingaway,becauseherold
friend’svoiceturnedgentle.
“Iexpectedthiswouldbeabaddaytovisit,butthat’spartlywhyIdid,Emma.I’msureyouknow
thateveryone’sbuzzingaboutyoursuddenbrokenengagement.Anditseemslikeyoumustbe
bearingthebruntofthetalkalone.Idon’tknowifReedholeduponhisranchorjustplain
disappearedforawhile,butwordhasitthathe’scompletelyoutofsight.Unfortunatelythat’smade
thegossipmongerscackleevenmore.”
WhenEmmadidn’trespond,Marysaidsoftly,“Idon’twanttoaddtoallthat.Ijustthoughtyou
mightneedsomeonearoundwhowasn’tgoingtoaskyouquestionsorbugyou.Itmayhavebeen
yearssinceIlivedinEastwick,butit’snotlikeI’veforgottenhowthegrapevineworks—Aw,hell.
Don’t,Em.Don’t.”
Emmawasn’tcrying.Shenevercriedinpublic.Sheknewpeoplethoughtofherasidealistic,butno
onehadaclueshe’dgrownupwithanalcoholicparentoranythingelsethatwaspersonallydifficult.
She’dlearnedatayoungagetokeepvulnerabilityoutofsight.Itwasjust…
Nothingseemedimportantrightnow.Shecouldn’tcarelessaboutgossipandEastwick.Running
thegalleryandcancelingweddingarrangementsandalltheotherlifechoresshe’ddonethatdayhad
seemedbeyondirrelevant.Shecouldn’tevengarneranyinterestinfacingthemajorlifechallenges
andchangesshehadtobecauseoflosingthetrustshe’dcountedonforsolong.
“Oh,Emma…”Marysurgedtowardherandtriedtopullherintoahug.“Iunderstand.Ithurts.It
doesn’tmatterwhocausedthebreakup.Breakingupisalwayshorrible.Whateverhappenedbetween
youandReed…”
“It’snotReed,”shechokedout.
“Yeah,right.Likeyourheart’snotbroken?”
God,whatamess.Herheartwasbroken,fordamnsure.ButnotoverReed.
OverGarrett.
Everythingelsemightbelife-alteringandawfulandpainful.Buttheonethingshecouldn’timagine
gettingoverwashowcompletelyshe’dmisjudgedGarrett.She’dneverfalleninlovebefore.Never
feltlove.Notthewayshedidforhim.
Andtohavehimbelieveshe’dpursuedhimtogetaninheritance?
Howcouldheknowhersolittle?Howcouldhethinksolittleofher?
Eleven
GarrettstoodonthetarmacattheprivateairportinEastwick,waitingfortheLeartoslidetoa
smoothstopandthedoorstofinallyopen.
Theskywasfatwithmuddyclouds,theraincomingdowninasteadydownpour—matching
Garrett’sdarkmoodperfectly.
Still,whenthelonepassengerclippeddownthemetalstepsfromtheplane,Garretthustledtoward
him.Hissister ’shusbandwasstocky,withblondhairandweather-ruddyskin,wearingatropical
khakijacketandchinosthatlookedwellsleptin.
“Griff.”Garrettextendedahandfirst.Bothwereprivatemenandtoostrong-mindedtobeclose
friends,butallGarrettwantedfromhissister ’shusbandrightnowwastobeafull-fledgedally.
Griff’sexpressionseemedtoechothesamesentiment.“I’mgladitwasyouwhoarrangedforthe
privateplaneandhadmepickedup.Idon’tunderstandwhat’sgoingon.Yourparentshaven’ttoldme
anythingexceptthatCarowasinthehospital.”
“Let’sgetoutoftherain.Thenwe’lltalk.”
“Ihaven’tsleptinalmostthirtyhours.ButIstillwanttohear—”
“Youwill.”Garrettdrove,takingthesouthroadwherethehighwaysnakedaroundcurves,
revealingviewsofthepewterbay.Thewindshieldwiperscouldbarelykeepupwiththesteady,
slooshingrain.
TheypassedtheroadtotheCartwrighthouse.Afterthatcamethesecludednestofhomesthat
includedtheBaldwinmansion.Intown,eventhisearlyintheday,allthestorelightsandstreetlamps
werealreadyonbecauseofthedarkstorm.Acrackleoflightningpromisedmoreofthesame.When
theypassedtheFarnsworthhouse,Grifffinallyspokeup.
“Youmissedtheroad.”
“No.Ithinkwe’dbettertalkbeforeyouseemysister.”
TherollingcountryoutsideEastwickhadclustersofhorsefarmsandstables—andnicelittle
countryroadswhereacarcouldpullin,cuttheengineandnotbenoticedintheshadowoftrees.
Garrettputhisheadbackandthenjustletthetruthout.“Shetriedtocommitsuicide.Camedamnclose
tosucceeding.”
“What?Yourparentstoldmeshewascriticallyillfromsomekindofdruginteraction.Whichis
whatIfoundsoconfusing,becausetheonlymedicineIknewshewastakingwasbirthcontrolandan
occasionalaspirin.What—”
Garrettmotionedhimtosilence.Heturned,needingtolookathisbrother-in-law,needingtoknow
thismanbetterthanheeverhadbefore.“She’snotherself,Griff.She’sshakyandscaredandshe
needshelp.Notsomeonewho’sgoingtocrucifyher.”
“YouthinkIwould?Hell,I’dneverhavelefthomeatallifI’drealizedshewasdepressed.”He
staredatGarrett.“There’smore,isn’tthere?”
“Yes.Waymore.”
“Tellme.Now.Ineedtoknowexactlywhat’swrongwithmywife.Andwhatthehell’sgoingonthat
noone’sgivenmeastraightanswerbeforethis.”
Garrettdidn’tmove.Hisbrother-in-law’srespondingwithangerwasjustwhathe’dhavedoneif
someonehaddaredtokeephiminthedark.Buthestillworriedhowtohandlethesituationbecause
heknewtacthadneverbeenhisstrongsuit.
“Isaid,tellme.What’sgoingon?Idemandtoknow.”
“AndIwanttotellyoubecauseIbelieveyourknowingthewholepicturecouldbeamatterofmy
sister ’slife.OtherwiseI’dneverconsiderbreakingherconfidence.ButIcan’tgiveyouthewhole
pictureatthisexactminute.”
“Thehellyoucan’t.”
Garrettdidn’tsmile,buthealmostwantedto.Itwassoeasytodealwithanotherman.Men
understoodeachother.Menrespondedinpredictableways.
MenwerenothinglikeEmma.
“ThisiswhatIwanttodo,Griff,”hesaidbluntly.“Ineedtogivemysisterachancetotellyouthe
situationherself.Ifyoustillhaveanyquestionstwodaysfromnow,thencallme.Ipromisetofillyou
in.”
“Notgoodenough,”Griffsnapped.
“Ithastobe.BecauseIwon’tbetrayhertrustifIdon’thaveto.AndrightnowIdon’twanttoeven
takeyoubacktoherunlessI’mdamnsureyou’llbegoodtoher.”
“IloveCaroline,forGod’ssake!WhyonearthwouldyouthinkIwouldn’tbegoodtoher?
Becausewehadsometroubleacoupleyearsback—”
“No,that’snotit.”Garrettrolleddownawindow.Rainwhiskedin,butitwastoohotandtootight
inthecarwithoutfreshair.Forthatmatter,rightnowhiswholelifefelttoohotandtootightto
breathe.Andhissister ’smesswasonlypartofit.“Ittookalongtimeformetotrustyou—”
“That’salikewise.IalwaysthoughtCarolinelovedyoumorethanme.”
“Shedoesn’t.Shelovesyoumorethananyoneoranythingintheuniverse.”Garrettsaiditbluntly,
toseeGriff’sreaction.
“Ifeelthesamewayabouther.”Nohesitation.Onlyincreasedanxiety.“Ineedtoknowwhat’s
wrongorhowcanIpossiblyknowwhattodoorhowtohelpher—”
“Andonewayoranother,youwill.Ipromise.But…Griff,youknowourbackground.Ourparents.
YouknowCarolineneverhadthesecurityoffeelingwantedorneeded.”
“You’renottellingmenews.”
“I’mjustsaying…shewasalwaysmorelikelytomakesomemistakesthatmaybeanotherwoman
wouldn’t.Notbecauseoflackofcharacter.Butbecauseoflackofsecurity,ontheinside.Andifyou
can’tdealwiththat,thenI’djustassoontakeyoubacktothatplane.Flyyouanywhereyouwanttogo.
Payyourway—”
“Shutup,Garrett.I’mnotbribable.Ithoughtyouknewthat.”
FinallyGarrett’spulseeased.“Ihopedyouwouldn’tbe.”Headded,“She’sscaredtoseeyou.Know
that.Andashamedofthissuicideattempt.Knowthat,too.Andifyoudidn’tguess,ourparentsheaped
morestress—andguilt—onherheadratherthanless.”
“Nothingnewthere,huh?”Griffsaidwrylyandthensankagainstthepassengerseatasiftryingto
processalltheinformationandimplicationsjustgivenhim.“Getmehome,wouldyou?”
“Yes.”Garrett,reassured,startedthecarandaimedtowardtheirhouse.Barelyanotherminute
passedbeforeGriffpipedupagain.
“What’swrong?”
Garrettglancedathim.“Youdon’tthinkthescenarioIlaidoutforyouwasenough?”
“Imeant…what’swrongwithyou?Youlookasifyouhaven’tsleptinaweek.Businesstroubles?”
“No.”Garretthesitated.Normallyhe’dneverhaveconfessedapersonalproblemtoanyone.But
becausehewantedastrongerbondwithGriff—andbecausehefeltsodamnedshatteredhecouldn’t
thinkclearlyanyway—headmitted,“Itseemsthatmylovelifehasalotincommonwithatrain
wreck.”
“SomeoneinNewYork?”
“No.Thewhereofitdoesn’tmatter.Thethingis…hell,IguessIjustassumeditwouldnever
happentome.ThatI’dfall,likeinthestorybooks.Ithoughtthewholethingwasamyth.Until…her.I
can’tbelievehowthewholeworldchanged,thatfast,thatcompletely.Only…”
WhenGarrettdidn’timmediatelyfillinthatblank,Griffguessed,“Shecheatedonyou?”
“No.Nothinglikethat.”
“Shedoesn’tcarethesamewayyoudo?”
“Ithoughtshedid.”Garrettstoppedataredlight,stareddeadaheaduntilitchanged.“NowIdon’t
know.Ijustfoundoutthatourgettingmarriedcouldmeanatonofmoneyforher.Iunderstand
money.Believeme.AndI’dmarryheranywayshe’dhaveme,tobehonest.It’sjust…Ithoughther
beingwithmewasabout—”Hecouldn’t,didn’t,saythewordlove.Nottoanotherman.“Ithoughtwe
wereclicking.Thatwebothfeltthesamethingexplodingbetweenus.Soithitmeintheguthard.That
therewasmoneybehindit.”
“You’resuretherewas?”
“Oh,yeah,I’msure.Shecameoutandadmittedit.”Garrettkeptreplayingthewholethinginhis
mind.Hersittingthereonhischair,wearinghisshirt.Hisfeelingsofullofemotionforher,love,
caring,protectiveness,lust,allofit.Andthenhersoguilelesslyspillingthewholestoryofher
suddenlylostinheritance.Herknowing—becauseshehadtoknow—thathewassowrappedupinher
thatshecouldhavesaidanythingintheuniversetohimatthatmoment.
HecouldfeelGriff’seyesonhim.Theywereonlyapinchawayfrompullingintohissister ’s
driveway.“Hell,that’srough,”hisbrother-in-lawsaidquietlyandthenslowlyadded,“Itseemsironic
thatwewerejusttalkingabouttheissuesthataffectCaroline…andthatyou’regoingthrough
somethingthesameway.”
“Comeagain?”
“Imeant…Iknowhowyoutwogrewup.Thatcoldhousehold.Yourparentsintostatusandthe
prestigeoftheirsociallifeatonmorethantheyseemedtocareabouteitherofyoukids.”
Garrettpulledintothedriveway,braked.“That’sexactlywhyIneedyoutobeextragoodto
Caroline.Needyoutogivehermoreropethansomeoneelse.Shehasatonofloveinher,Griff.ButI
think,comingfromwherewedid,it’dbeunrealistictothinkshecouldmakeamarriageworkwithout
gettinglostnowandthen.Idon’tmeanthatanything’syourfault.Orhers.Justthatforsurethetwoof
usarestuckwithalongerlearningcurvethanmostpeople.”
“Yeah,”Griffagreed.“That’sexactlywhyIaskedifyouwerepositiveaboutthatwoman’sfeelings
foryou.BecausepossiblytheKeatingbackgroundinfluencedhowyousawthesituation.”
Garrettsawhissister ’sfaceinthelivingroomwindow,sawGriff’seyeslightupwhenhesawher.
WhenGriffshotoutofthecar—completelyforgettinghisluggage—Garretthadtosmile,hadto
believethosetwohadarealchanceatmakingthingsrighttogether.
Buthissmiledisappearedashebackedoutofthedriveway.
Hisbrother-in-law’sinsightstartedclawingonhisnerves—abouthishavingthesame
dysfunctionalbackgroundCarolinedid.Garrettknewexactlyhowrelationship-challengedhewas.
Butthatsureashelldidn’tmeanheknewhowtofixtheshatteringmesshe’dmadewithEmma.
Beforehecouldpanic,though,hepulledoverthesideoftheroadanddialedhercell.
Sheanswered—whichwasgood.Buthecouldhearheapsofnoiseandotherpeople’svoicesinthe
background,aswellasthechillinhervoice—whichwasn’tsogood.
“Look,”hesaidandthenstopped.“Iupsetyou.”
“Morethanupsetme.”
“Iwasinthewrong,”hesaidimmediatelybutcouldn’tverywellelaboratebecausehedidn’tknow
exactlywhathe’ddone.
“Notwrong,”Emmacorrectedhim.“Notifthatwashonestlyhowyoufelt.”
Hesensedaterrifyingtrapandshiftedtowhatmattered.“Iwanttomarryyou.That’showIfeel.
That’swhatIthoughtyouwanted,too…maybenotthatveryminute?Iassumeyou’dhavewantedto
spendmoretime,haveachancetobemoresure.Butrightthenwaswhenthemoneyproblemcame
up.”
“Garrett,Ididn’ttellyouabouttheproblembecauseIwasexpectingyoutosolveit.Itoldyou
becauseitwassomethingtraumaticthathappenedtomeandIthought—hoped—thatyou’dbecome
someoneIcouldhonestlytalktowhentherewasaproblem.”
“Youcan.ForGod’ssake,youcan.”Hepushedon.“Emma,Idon’tgiveadamnaboutmoney.I’ve
gotplentyofmoney.Itdoesn’tneedtobeanissue—”
“Butitis,”shesaidsosoftlyhecouldbarelyhearovertheconfoundingnoiseinherbackground.
“IfyouthoughtIwaswithyou—ifyouthoughtthatIsleptwithyou—asawayofgettingmy
inheritance,thenwe’renotjustworldsapart.We’reauniverseapart.I’msorryImisunderstood.”
“Emma—”hestartedtosay.Buttherewasnoonelistening.She’dquietlyhungup.
Outofnowhere,therainhadsuddenlystopped.Cloudstumbledovereachothertorevealpatchesof
azuresky.Abunnypeekedoutfromthewoodsyroadside.Theafternoonhadturnedidyllic.
Everywherebutinsidehim.
He’dlosther.Hehadn’tbeendeadpositiveuntilnow,butthisconversationsealedwhathe’dfeared
allday.He’dblownit.Apparentlyirreparably.He’djustfoundher—theonewomanwho’dmadehim
believeinlove,inhimself,inafuture.Andnowshewasgone.
Withouther,hefeltaknifetwistinhisheart,sosharp,soraw,thathisincrediblystupidheart
actuallyfeltbroken.Andthat’sexactlyhowitwasgoingtobe,hefeared.
Eitherhemiraculously—quickly—foundawaytohealthisbreachwithEmmaorneitherhislife
norhisheartwouldeverbethesame.
SeveraldayslaterEmmaslippedintoaseatattheDebs’table.Thelunchhadbeenscheduledafew
daysearlierthanusual—technicallytodoamoreformalwelcomebackforMaryDuvall,butEmma
hadprivatereasonsforwantingthislunchoverandoutoftheway.
Afterspendingthelastfourdayssoul-andheart-searching,Emmahaddiscoveredallkindsof
hiddensidestoherselfshedidn’tknowshehad.Somewerepleasant.Somenot.Butshe’dsurfaced
fromallthatinternalsearching,madeseveralpainfulmajorlifedecisionsandwasreadytoact.
Thislunchwashardlyonthelevelofhugelifechanges,butitwasstillsomethingthatneededtobe
done.Thegirlsallwanderedinrightatnoon.Marytooktheseatnexttoher.Outside,itwashotter
thanthedevil.Harrywaspolishingglassesbehindthemalachitebar.Kidsscreamedoutatthepool,
andthegolferswerehikinginforlunch.
Emmahadchosentowearice-bluetoday,justsilkslacksandasleevelesstunic,butshe’dadded
whitetopazforjewelry.Itwasherversionofpowerdressingforahotday—andsheknewshe’dbe
grilledupthewazoo,sotherewasnowayaroundbeinginthehotseattoday.
Initially,though,thelunchstartedeasily.Harryservedafresh-fruitsalad,openedthewine,brought
outthecheeseandseafoodplates.Thegrouphadoptedforamunchlunch.Felicityhadtuckedinnext
toher,Lilyacrossfromher,withVanessaThorpeandAbbyTalbottakingthefarends.Carolinehad
joinedthem,herfirstoutingsinceshe’dgottenoutofthehospital.
Wheneveryonesettleddown,EmmaproposedatoasttoMary.“Wewereallsobusytalkinglast
timethatweneverreallyhadachancetowelcomeMarybackhome.Atfirstshethoughtshewasonly
comingtotakecareofhergrandfather,butnowitlookslikeshe’shopingtostaypermanentlybackin
Eastwick.Right,Mary?”
EmmahadhopedthegroupwouldbedistractedbyMary—andtheywereforafewminutes.But
they’dbarelyfinishedthefirstcoursebeforethegroupnose-divedonher.
Felicityledthepack.“Comeon,Emma,youhavetotelluswhathappenedwithReed.Nooneknows
anything!Andnowhe’sdisappearedforawhile,sonobodycanaskhim.Youweretheonewhonever
wantedtogetmarried,butthenyoufoundReedandseemedsohappy.Comeon,whathappened?”
ThequestionwasexactlywhatEmmahadexpected—andwhyshe’dbeendeterminedtofacethis
lunchandsaywhatneededtobesaid.“I’msorry,everyone,buttherewasnobig,dramatic,
scandalousreasonforthebreakup.IthinkIrealizedalongtimeagothatwecaredabouteachotheras
friends,whichwasgreatbutnothowtwopeopleabouttobemarriedshouldfeel.”
“Sowhobrokeitoff?YouorReed?”Vanessaasked.
“Emma,ifyouweren’taware,”Abbypokedin,“Reedmaybeflyingundertheradarthesedays,but
beforethathespreadtheworditwashisfaultaboutthebrokenengagement.Thatyoudidn’tdo
anythingwrong.Sodidhecheat?”
“No,no.Reeddidn’tdoanythingwrong.”
“That’snotwhatthegossipersaresaying.Everybodythinkssomethingbighadtohavehappenedto
causesuchasuddenbreakup.SotheyfigureReedmusthavedoneyouwronginsomeway.”
Emmafirmlyputthattobed.“Well,hedidn’t.Ifhe’sbeenclaimingresponsibility,it’sonlybecause
Reed’salwaysgoingtodothegentlemanlythingandprotectawoman.Butthiswasn’tabouteitherof
usdoingsomethingwrong.”
“Ithinkyoubrokehisheart,”Felicitysaidbluntly.
Theaccusationstung.Itwasjustsoironictohavetotalkaboutbrokenheartswhenherownwas
crushedtobitsandshecouldn’tsharethatknowledge.“Well,IhopeIdidn’t.Butforanyonewhosees
Reed,Ihopeyou’llgivehimsympathy.TheonlythingIreallyregretisthatIevertookhisringto
beginwith,becauseIknownowhowcompletelywrongthatrelationshipwas.”
“Youlookpale,”LilyCartwrightsaidgently.
“Notsleeping?”Abbyguessed.
Theyletheroffthehook.Oncetheyalltookareallygoodlookather,infact,shegotanimmediate
bossylistofordersaboutgettingmoresleep,seeingadoctor,arrangingforamassage.
“Okay,that’senoughpickingonme,”shesaidwryly.“We’vegotalotmoretotalkaboutthislunch.
Caroline’sfinallyoutofthehospital.WeshouldbehavingadualcelebrationforbothMaryand
Caro.”
“Tobehonest,Ihaveahugesecrettotellyouall,”Carolinesaid,thenglancedaroundtoensureno
outsiderswerecloseenoughtohearthispartoftheconversation.Whenshetuggedherchaircloserto
thetable,theotherspulledupcloser,too.
“Myhusbandwantedmetotellyouthis.SodidmybrotherGarrett,whichI’msureEmmaalready
knows.”Carolinetookahugebreath.“I’vebeenhidingsomethingfromeveryone.Iwasbeing
blackmailed.”
“What?”Thequestionechoedthroughthewholegroup,everyoneexpressingshockexceptforLily.
“That’swhyIwassodepressed.Theblackmailerwasthreateningme,andIwasafraidifthe
informationgotout,itwouldruinmymarriage,mylife.ButGarrettconvincedmetotellGriff.And
whenGriffgothome,Idid.”TearswelledinCaroline’seyes,butthistimenottearsoffearsor
sadness.Tearsofrelief.“It’sbeenterrible.”
“Oh,Caroline.”Lilyreachedforherfirst.“That’sexactlywhathappenedtous.Jackwasa
blackmailer ’starget,too.Jacktooktheblackmaillettertothepoliceafewweeksago.”
“Griffhasn’tdonethatyet.Ihaven’t,either.”
“Doit,”Lilyurged.“Thinkaboutit,Caroline.Don’tyouthinkit’shighlyunlikelytherecouldbe
twoblackmailersinEastwick?Sothiscouldwellbethesamepersonwhowasterrorizingus.”
Abbysuddenlyspokeup.“There’saconnectionbetweenthetwo.Therehastobe.Betweenmy
mother ’smysteriousdeathandthetheftofherjournalsandnowtwoblackmailattempts.Whoever
stolethosejournalsisusingtheinformation.”
“That’swhatitsoundslike,”Carolineagreedworriedly.“But,Abby,yourmomneverpublished
stuffthatwasso…damaging.Shewasn’tintocruelty—”
“Shepublishedthetruth.Sheneverinventedanything.Butthat’spartofwhatIthinkistheissue.She
didn’tuseeverythingsheknew.Therecouldhavebeenallkindsofthingsinthosejournalsthatno
oneknewbutmymotherand,ofcourse,thepeopleinvolved.Andnowwhoeverstolethosejournals
knowsthatkindofprivateinformation,too.”
“Butwho?”Vanessaasked.“IthastobesomeoneinEastwick.Someoneweknow.Someonewho’d
knowenoughaboutusalltoknowwhatwouldhurtdifferentpeople,youknow?Astrangercouldn’t
readanystufflikethatandknowitcouldcausedamage.”
“Yikes,”Felicitysaid.“Thisisgettingscarierandscarier.Tothinkthatsomeoneweknowandtrust
istheculprit.”
“Notjustaculprit.Ablackmailerandamurderer.”Abbydrummedherfingernailsonthetable.“I
hateitthatyouwereavictim,too,Caroline.Butitmakesmefeelevenmoreconvincedthatmy
motherwasmurdered.I’mgoingbacktothepolice.Onewayoranother,wehavetofindoutwho’s
behindallthis.”
Thegirlsbuzzed,unitedasbeesbringingfreshhoneybacktothehive—andEastwickwastheir
hive,sotherewasnoquestionabouttheirwantingtoprotectit.Anyothertime,Emmawouldhave
beenroiledupastherestofthem,andshewasrelievedtohearthatthereasonforCaroline’ssuicide
attempthadfinallycomeoutintheopen.Still,Garrett’suncoveringhissister ’ssecretstirredherown
heartsicksituationagain.ItwassolikehimtogetthatsecretoutofCaronomatterwhatittook.
Garrettwouldgototheendsoftheearthforthoseheloved.ButknowingthatonlygaveEmmaa
freshtasteofdespair…untilshesuddenlyrealizedthatallconversationatthetablehadstopped.
Thatneverhappened.NotwiththeDebs.Evenwhentherewasn’tacrisisofevents,theytalkedeach
others’earsoff.SothesuddensilencemadeEmma’sheadshootup.“What…?”shebegantoask.
Butthenshesawthemanwendinghiswayfromthedoorwaytotheirtable.Itwashardtoguesswhy
orhowGarrettsnaredthewomen’scompleteattention,butEmmawastednotimewonderingabout
that.
Hesearchedthecrowd,searchedallthefaces—foundhers.
Theireyesmet.
Hekeptcoming.Hiseveryfootstepbroughtanewracetoherheart.Heneverfaltered,never
lookedaway,neverglancedattheotherwomen.Whenhereachedthetable,hejustreachedoutahand
andsnaggedherwrist.
“I’msorrytointerruptyourlunch,ladies,butIneedEmma.Rightnow,”hesaid.“Andthiswon’t
wait.”
Twelve
Emmahadnologicalreasontofeelherheartsuddenlyrushwithhope.Butitdid.Justfromseeing
him.Justfromfeelinghishandclaspedinhers.Shedidn’tknowwhyhe’dsoughtherout,didn’tcare.
Forthosefewmoments,justbeingwithhimseemedenoughtostaveoffthatawfuldespairchewing
onherheart.
Butwhenheusheredherintothepassengerseatofhiscar,shecouldn’thelpasking,“Wherearewe
going?”
“Aplacewherewecantalkwithnointerruptions,guaranteed.Allright?”
“Yes.”Itwasmorethanallright.Hewantedtotalktoher—butshesofiercelywantedtotalktohim.
Shewatchedhim,nottheroad,ashedrove.Forfourdaysandfournightsshe’dpinedforhim.
She’dhurtsobadlytothinkhe’dbelieveshewasagolddigger.
Butthosesamefourdaysandfournightsshe’ddoneenoughanalyzingandagonizingtofacesome
scarytruths.TheDebs’lunchtodayhadreechoedoneofherdiscoveries.Garretthaddiscoveredhis
sister ’ssecret,duganddugandduguntilhe’dfoundawaytohelpCaroline—thengoneafterhelping
herwholehog.Thatwashowhelived,whohewas.
Emmahadsofallenfortherightman—amanwho’dclimbK2andbackforsomeoneheloved.
Shejusthadn’trealizedhowhischaracterdirectlyappliedtohowhe’dreactedtoherdaysbefore.
“I’vethoughtoveralotofthingsoverthepastfewdays,”hesaidquietly.
“SohaveI.”Whenhedidn’taddanythingmorepersonal,shetriedtakingadifferentconversational
track.“Carolinehadalottosayatlunchtoday.Itsoundsasifeverything’sgoingtoworkoutallright
forher.Thankstoyou.”
“There’snohappyendinginthebankyet.Nothingcanbecompletelyresolveduntiltheblackmailer
iscaught.But…”
“Butwhat?”
“ButI’vedoneallIcando.Therestisuptoherhusband.Andthepolice.”Garrettshotheraquick
glance.“Ilovemysister,butIhaveotherthingsonmymindrightnow.”
Thatsoundedominous.Whenshe’dthoughtaboutseeinghimagain,Emmahadassumedshe’drush
tosayallthethingsshewantedandneededto.Yetthefearofhisrejectingher,oflosinghimasecond
time,keptathickknotinherthroat.Shecouldn’ttellfromhisexpressionwhathewantedtosayor
whathewanted.
Theypassedthetown,thewealthysuburbs,hitthecoastroad.Lessthanfiveminuteslaterheturned
inataprivateairstrip.AsilverLearsatontherunway,stairspulleduptotheopendoor.Adarkhaired
manstoodinthedoorway.Garrettdrovethecarrightonthetarmactothesteps.
“Whatonearth—?”
“Justaprivateplacetotalk,”heassuredher.
Thatwasalie.Shecouldseeitinhiseyes.Buttheplaneandlocationweresomystifyingthatshe
decidedtojustwaithimout,seewhathewasupto.
Garrettclimbedoutofthecarandspoketothemanwhodescendedfromtheplane—Emmathought
sheheardtheguywascalledDoug.ThenGarrettcamebackforher.
“ThisismydriverfromNewYork,Emma.Ihavetotradethissetofwheelsforanother.”
Itseemedevenmoremystifyingthathe’dbefussingwithcarorbusinessproblemsatthisprecise
moment,butshewentalong.Theminuteshesteppedout,Dougimmediatelyclimbedinandtookoff
withthecar.Whichwasfine.Onlytherewasn’tanothervehicleinsight.
Garrettmotionedhertowardtheplane.“Iknowitlookscrazy.Butit’stheoneplaceintheuniverse
whereIcanguaranteethatnoone,absolutelynoone,willeitherinterruptorfindus.”
Sheneversawnervesinhisexpression,hisposture,yetsomethingabouthimwassocompletely
differentthatitfinallyregistered:hewasscared.Damnneartooscaredtobreathe.Atleast,tobreathe
normally.
Sheclimbedthestepsaheadofhimandduckedinside.She’dbeeninprivateplanesallherlife,but
notthisspecificLear.Theinsidehadbeencustomizedtoresemblealivingroom.Thecouchesand
easychairshadseatbelts,butotherwise,thewhiteleatherfurnishingsandpolishedcherrycouldhave
beeninanycomfortableden.Oncetheywereinside,outofthebrightsunlight,andshewasfinally
completelyalonewithhim,shewhirledaround.Itwasallshecouldtakeofmystifyingmysteriesand
waiting.
“Iwaswrong,Garrett,”shewhispered.
“No.Notyou.Iwastheonewhowaswrong.”
Sheshookherhead.“Youassumedthatmoneymatteredtome.Iwantedtodenythatfromhereto
Poughkeepsie.ButwhenIlookedatmylife,reallylooked,Irealizedyouhadeveryreasontomake
thatassumption.”Shegulped,thenspilledmoreout.“I’vehadeverythingIeverwanted.Justtookit
forgranted.I’vebeenspoiled.”
“No,youhaven’t,Em.EverywhereIlook,you’regivingsomethingtoothers—”
“AndIlovegiving.Butit’sbeeneasyforme,Garrett.Easyformetokeeptakinghandoutsfrom
myparentsbecauseIalwayshadtheexcuseofthetrustfundcomingin.Buttherealitywasthatitwas
easytospend,easytoliveexactlyhowIwantedtolive.Iguessitshouldhavebeenobvioustome,but
awomanalmostthirtywho’sneverlivedwithinhermeansisdarnspoiled.Fromyourviewpoint,I’d
beamazedifyouhadn’tseenmeasselfish.”
Finallythatcalm,quietexpressioninhisfaceseemedtocrack.Suddenlyhisdarkeyeslooked
liquidandnaked,rawwithvulnerabilityandsomethingelse.“Emma,youarepositivelytheleast
selfishpersonIknow.”
“Garrett,I’mtryingtosaythatIunderstand.WhyyouthoughtImighthave…pursued…you,
knowingtherewasathreattomyinheritance.Irealizenowthatyouhadeveryreasontothinkofme
asmaterialistic—”
“Stop.”Hescrabbledahandthroughhishair.“Iadmitit,Emma.Ididthinkthat—forashortperiod
oftime.Whereyousawthatjudgmentasaninsult,Ijustthoughtofitaslife.Thepracticalwaypeople
areinreallife.ButthenIdidsomesoul-searching,too.Andrealizedthatgrowingup,allthevaluesI
sawstemmedfrommoney.Nooneinmyfamilymadeachoicethatdidn’tincludemoney.Value—all
value—wasdefinedbymoney.”
“Iunderstand.”
“No.Youcan’t.Itwasaknee-jerkreactionformetorespondthatway.Ididn’twantyoutoneedme
onlybecauseofmoney.Ididn’twantyoutobelieveIgaveadamnaboutyourmoney,either.Ijust
wantedtheretobeanus.SoIjustsaidthefirstthingthatwouldmakethatmoneyproblemdisappear.”
Emmajoltedinshockwhenastrangershowedupinthecockpitdoor.Shehadn’trealizedanyone
elsewasontheplane.Thegray-hairedmanraisedahandingreeting,thensaidquickly,“We’vebeen
clearedfortakeoff,Mr.Keating.Fiveminutes.”Heturned,pulledtheplane’sdoorshutthen
disappearedbackintothecockpitaftersealingthatdoorclosed,too.
EmmashotstartledeyesatGarrett.
“Aw,hell,”hesaid.“IfIwereaknightinshiningarmor,Icouldpullthisoffthewayitshouldbe.
ButI’mnot,Em.Thisisthething—Icanhaveyoubackbeforeworktomorrowifyouneedtobe,but
there’ssomewhereIwantyoutoflywithmenow.Justsayyes.”
Forthatexpressioninhiseyes,she’dhavesaidyestoanythingheasked.Hestrappedherinnextto
himjustintimetoheartheenginesstartup.Beforetheyzoomedintotheair,though,heputtwoboxes
inherlap.Theywerebothsapphirevelvet—oneasmallsquareboxandtheotheralargeoblong
shape.
Thejethadleveledoffabovethecloudsbeforeheletheropenthebigone.Shefoundallkindsof
papers—alabreportonbloodtests,thedeedandtitletoColor,thedeedtoabrownstonein
Manhattan,amarriagelicense,anappointmentwithanunknownmanforlaterthatsameday.
Shelookedup,bothoverwhelmedandconfused.
“Theappointmentiswithanartist.Thesecondboxisempty,Emma,fornow,becauseIdidn’twant
anheirloomorastandardring.Iwantedadesigncreatedthat’suniquelyforyouandonlyyou.AndI
thoughtit’dbeagoodtimetodothatrightafterdinner.”
“Afterdinner,”shesaidfaintly.
“Yeah.Ithoughtwecouldgetmarriedfirst.Ihadtocallyourdoctortogettheblood-testform.And
Iboughtacoupleofplaingoldmatchingbandssowecouldhaveatokenbeforeyourrealringis
ready.”
“Married,”shesaidfaintly.
“Iwasthinkingaboutbuyingyouanisland.Justasmallone.Foragetaway.Aplacewherewecould
skinny-dipinthepalebluewaterandsleeponabedofrosepetalsandwatchsunrisesandsunsets
together.ButIhaven’thadachanceyetto—”
“Achance,”shesaidfaintly.
Heunhookedhersafetybelt,thenhis,then,asifsheweighedlessthanacottonpuff,pulledher
directlyonhislap.“Emma,pleasedon’targuewithme.Weneedtobemarriedbeforeyourthirtieth
birthday.Idon’twantyouever,everworriedaboutyourindependence.That’swhyIputallthese
papersinmotion,includingatrustforyou—atrustthat’sallyours.Nomatterwhathappenstome.
Andasfarasyourtrust,cookie—”
Hemotionedwhenshetriedtospeak.
“Asfarasyourtrust,Ithinkwecouldsavethatforourkids.Thenyoucanputitcompletelyoutof
yourmind,neverthinkaboutitagain.Buttherestoftheplan,wecouldkeepitbetweenus.”
“Betweenus,”sheechoedonelasttime.
“Youcoulddivorcemeafteryourbirthdayifyouwant.Butthissolveseverything,youknow?You
don’thavetofretinheritancesoranythingelse,butyoucanstillgetwhatshouldhavebeenyours
fromthestart.Andwhilewe’retogether,I’dhavethechancetowooyou,cookie.Toexperimentwith
beingabetterwhiteknight.ToloveyouthewayIwantyoutobeloved—”
Ittookakisstoshuthimup.Who’dhaveguessedhersocontrolled,sostrongGarrettcouldbeso
vulnerable?Yetwhenherlipsgrazedhis,herlovercametolife.Asoftkissbecamericher,sweeter,
deeper.Eyesclosed,sheofferedhimherheart,windingherarmsaroundhim,sealinghimcloseto
her.
Finallysheliftedherheadandfrowned.“DidImentionthatIwascrazyaboutyou?”
“Idon’tthinkitcameup,”hesaid.
“DidImentionhowmuchIloveyou?”
“No.ButIwasstartingtobelieveit.”
“Onlystarting?”Shezoomeddownagainandforcedhimtosufferthroughanothersetofkisses,a
scaleofkissesandtouchesandembracesthatthreatenedtocrumblehiscontrol…andfordarnsure,
hers.
“Ibelieve,Ibelieve,”hewhisperedtenderly.
“Ilikethatphraseyouusedaboutourbuildingsomethingonlybetweenus,”shewhisperedback.
“Wecandoit,Garrett.Buildourowndynasty,ourownway.Buildahouse.Buildafamily.”
“Buildalife.Withloveframingeverydayinit,”hesaid.Andthatwasthelasteitherofthemwasted
timetalking.
Lookforthenextbookinthe
SECRETLIVESOFSOCIETYWIVESminiseries!
THEONE-WEEKWIFEbyPatriciaKay
comingfromSilhouetteDesireJuly2006.
SILHOUETTEBOOKS
ISBN1-55254-482-6
THESOON-TO-BE-DISINHERITEDWIFE
Copyright©2006byHarlequinBooksS.A.
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