Unmasked
Copyright © 2011 by Lissa Matthews
Cover Art by Valerie Tibbs
This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters,
places, and incidents are products of the writer's
imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be
construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or
dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely
coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be
reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any manner
whatsoever without written permission from the author
except in the case of brief quotation embodied in critical
articles and reviews.
Again, for my readers.
Unmasked
Lissa Matthews
Bobby adjusted the mask as he stood just inside the
club's second floor door. It was the first time he'd ever
come to the warehouse home of Abyss alone. He was
actually glad to have the mask on. People knew him here.
People expected him to be a certain type of person here. A
womanizer. A letch, even. Most definitely not a man
interested in another man. It was a reputation he'd worked
hard at cultivating. It was a reputation that was about to go
up in smoke in just a short amount of time. Was he ready
for this? He'd been asking himself that question at least
once an hour for the last week. Was he ready to step out of
the closet? Was he ready to embark publicly, on this
journey? Was he ready for his family, his friends, his best
friend to find out he was deeply in lust with another man?
That word, lust, didn't scare him like the other L word
did. He knew Thor wasn't in the same place he was
because Thor had no idea who Bobby was. How would
Thor feel once he found out? He knew Bobby's reputation
under his real name. Would Thor still want him?
Bobby sighed and dropped his hands to his sides. He
was still dressed from work, having come straight from a
business dinner he'd been unable to get out of. He hadn't
had time to change into more appropriate club attire, which
for him was usually black jeans and a skin tight t-shirt, along
with black leather boots. He at least shed his jacked and tie
in the car, ran a hand through his hair to dishelve it a bit, but
overall, he still looked like the lawyer he was in his real,
daytime life.
Real life. If everything went his way, this alternative
lifestyle with Thor would become his real life, his real
personal life. He'd have to come clean to those he was
closest with. He'd have to let them in on his little secret.
He'd have to open up about the man he wanted in his life.
Aidn, Bobby's best friend and Thor's mentor, didn't have a
clue. That's how good Bobby had been at keeping it
hidden, keeping his secret. But before anyone else could
find out anything, he'd have to let Thor in on his real identity.
Thor. Just thinking the man's name sent chills of
pleasure up and down Bobby's spine.
Nothing was going to happen at all though if he didn't
move out of the doorway and farther into the club. He took a
deep breath and started toward the corner where Thor and
Mick set up their flogging stations.
Bobby scanned the crowd as he walked through and
around the small groups of people milling about. He didn't
know anyone and no one seemed to look twice at him. He
had to admit, he felt a little out of place and more than a
little unsure of himself, which was a completely different
feeling for him. He was never unsure or insecure or
uncertain about anything. However, this change in his life
was nothing if not painfully nerve-racking. It was all he'd
been able to think about since Thor had walked out of that
top floor room last weekend. He hadn't allowed himself to
think Thor would want to see him again and so while Bobby
had fantasized about the other man, he'd never dared let
himself believe that more than one night could be possible.
Now, though...
There were a lot of differences between he and Thor.
Professionally more so than personally. Bobby was an
attorney, and a pretty damn good one. He dressed in high
priced, high powered suits. His shoes alone could probably
pay the rent of the club's warehouse home for a few
months.
Thor on the other hand was all blue collar and manual
labor, his body honed from his work in construction. He
worked outside all day, worked with his hands... His hands.
Bobby moaned to himself as he thought about Thor's
workman's hands, rough and hardened.
For the last week, every time Bobby thought about Thor
and the spanking he'd given, Bobby'd shifted in his desk
chair, swearing he could still feel the sting, the imprint of
Thor's palm on his ass. It was strictly his imagination, but it
kept him hard and wanting nonetheless. He'd wanted those
hands on him for so long and when he'd finally experienced
them, the reality had been better than any fantasy.
Tonight, he wanted to feel something more. Tonight, he
wanted to feel Thor's flogger against his back. He wanted
to feel Thor pressed against him with an erection that would
match the one already growing inside Bobby's pants.
But, Thor didn't usually flog men in the club. Mick, his
station partner, who was an openly gay dominant, usually
took all the men. Bobby had never wondered at it, had
actually always assumed Thor was straight, but taking a
chance at the Halloween house, asking for a spanking in
private, had changed everything. The mask had started out
as a Halloween prop, but then as the last night drew closer,
it became a shield against possible rejection. He'd been
prepared for Thor to say no.
Thor saying yes had both shocked Bobby and given him
hope. Thor sliding his cock between Bobby's lips and
saying he wanted to see Bobby again, had given him more
than he could have ever imagined. It gave him a chance...
He just had to trust his identity didn't take that chance away.
He settled in the back of the crowd surrounding the
flogging stations. In the spotlight, Thor and Mick stood back
to back, long, heavy tailed floggers in opposite hands,
wielding them with precision at the two people strapped to
each of the two St. Andrew's Cross' on either side of the
designated area. Both men moved fluidly, independently,
but at the same time, they moved together as one. It was a
sight to see and Bobby knew Thor and Mick practiced a
few times a week, knew they trained themselves mentally
and physically for the weekend shows they put on.
The slap of leather against skin echoed through the
corner. Sighs, and hisses of breath, backs bowing, bodies
arching, muscles contracting held those around Bobby, and
Bobby himself, rapt. It was like a spell being woven the way
the tails of the floggers arced through the air.
Bobby's own body responded with lust, arousal, and a
need so sharp it bordered on pain. He wanted to be up on
that cross. He wanted to be on the receiving end of Thor's
flogger. He wanted Thor, and watching him work, watching
him in his element, only drove that want deeper into his
blood.
Bobby did his best to shake off the hunger long enough
to turn his focus forward again. Thor's hair, normally in a
pony-tail or braid down his back, had been left loose to
hang around his shoulders tonight. Sweat plastered some
of the strands to his neck and cheeks and forehead. It also
had his flowing white shirt clinging to his broad and furred
chest. A smile twitched at Bobby's lips as he continued his
perusal of the man he couldn't stop thinking about.
Moving a few inches to the right, Bobby outright grinned
as he got a full length view of Thor. The man was in a kilt. It
had been more than a month since he'd worn it, opting
instead for leathers at the haunted house. The kilt, along
with the rest of his current attire was something of Thor's
trademark. Kick ass combat boots. Green, blue, and yellow
plaid kilt. White flowing shirt that left little to the imagination
as to the definition of his chest and abs. The nearly waist
length long hair, and a flogger in his hand.
It was little wonder to Bobby why people flocked to see
Thor work, why his Flogging 101 classes and workshops
were always standing room only, why women practically
orgasmed whenever he pet their hair and whispered in their
ears before stripping them topless. It's why Bobby
practically orgasmed every time he got near the man. Thor
exuded power in everything he did, in every flick of his wrist.
He commanded attention with little more than a look and
Bobby would be the first to admit, albeit quietly, Thor had
him wrapped around his little finger.
The two men lowered their floggers and stood side by
side to bow at the applause from the crowd gathered in
front of the rope. Thor and Mick moved to their respective
cross and slowly, methodically, carefully uncuffed and
massaged feeling back into the arms and shoulders of
those that had been bound. One man. One woman. And the
way the woman looked up at Thor, the way her eyes
couldn't seem to let go of him, well, Bobby understood what
she was trying to convey. It was far more than a thank you. It
was what had kept Bobby rooted to the bed last weekend
after Thor had spanked him, fucked his mouth, caressed
him and confirmed he'd wanted to see Bobby again.
There was always an intensity in Thor's gaze, whether in
rest or in scene, and Bobby more often than not found
himself staring whenever they were in mixed company with
mutual friends. He tried to keep it from being obvious, but
had been caught before, having had to play it off as being
lost in space.
His attention zeroed in on the male Mick had just
finished with. Another man had stepped forward with a
black leather jacket and the look on the male submissive's
face when he lifted his eyes upward took Bobby's breath
away. There was such devotion, such hunger evident on his
face. The man Bobby assumed was the dominant in the
relationship wrapped the jacket around the other man's
shoulders. A shiver of need slid through Bobby's body at
the way the dominant cradled the other man in his arms,
held him close and whispered something which caused the
submissive to nod against his chest. Bobby watched them
cross over the rope together, still huddled close, barely an
inch separating them and felt an ache that stretched from
his cock to his gut and up to his chest.
It was a feeling he'd never felt toward a woman or from
watching a woman with a man. He could honestly say,
looking back through all his years of dating women that he'd
never felt attached or felt the desire to become attached,
but watching the two men had him tied in knots. He wanted
that closeness. He may not be sure he wanted the
dominance and submission all the time, but he wanted a
relationship with a man. He wanted that commitment.
When the couple disappeared from view, he turned his
attention back to Thor's flogging station only to find the man
gone. Bobby's heartbeat thundered in his chest, panicked
that he may have missed him tonight.
"You want what they have, don't you? The two men."
Bobby's breath caught at the whispered words from
behind. Thor. And whispered wasn't exactly right, but given
the volume of the industrial music, it was as close to a
whisper as could be. He nodded his answer, heat creeping
up his neck that he'd been caught staring yet again, that he
hadn't been able to hide the longing.
Thor pressed himself against Bobby's back but
otherwise didn't touch him. Bobby wondered if Thor would
step away if he leaned back. He wondered but was too
scared to find out.
"Which one of us has feared being found out more? You
or me?"
The tone was conversational, the warmth radiating off
Thor was anything but& "Me."
"Because you wear the mask?"
Bobby felt the words more than heard them. He touched
the edges of the mask, ran his fingers along the string that
wrapped around the back of his head and again, nodded.
Thor slid a hand inside Bobby's front pants pocket and
squeezed his thigh. Bobby jolted and let loose a groan no
one could hear. His cock, already a painfully aroused
reminder of the path he wanted to embark on, twitched.
"You can keep it on for now. Come with me."
Bobby swayed a little when Thor removed his hand and
his heat, but then he wrapped his fingers around Bobby's
arm and tugged him toward the rope and St. Andrew's
Cross.
People were talking, a new crowd was gathering and
nerves settled themselves uneasily in Bobby's stomach.
He'd never done this before, the public thing. In the crowd a
few minutes ago, they were in shadow, enough darkness
around that that no one would have thought anything about
seeing them standing close and talking. They weren't in
shadow now. They were under spotlights, visible.
His eyes must have shown his hesitation, his uncertainty
because the softening in Thor's own eyes made Bobby feel
better in a way he couldn't explain. Nervous still, but it was
more manageable.
"This time is more for me than you," Thor said, his mouth
right up against Bobby's ear. "This is my coming out, so to
speak. No one knows your identity, not even me, but I've
never flogged a man in public, never been brave enough
because I knew once I did, I'd never be able to pull that
desire back in. For more reasons than I can name, I need
you to be my first. Please say you understand."
Warmth spread through Bobby at Thor's words and he
found his forehead touching, leaning on Thor's shoulder. He
wanted to drop to his knees, but figured Thor wasn't ready
for something that public. And in all honesty, Bobby didn't
think he was either. After all, he was still wearing a mask.
Thor's declaration though, was enough to cement
Bobby's earlier decision that he needed to reveal his
identity to Thor. Tonight. He wanted to make it real, make it
really real and about him, who he was. It wasn't how he'd
planned things to go. Hell, he hadn't actually planned
anything at all other than hoping to see and play with Thor
again. It looked like he was going to get his wish and part
of him would have liked to do it without the mask, but, not in
this place, not in public. He wanted to do it on his terms, in
private.
Thor placed a kiss to Bobby's ear and again, moved
away from him, his eyes harder, serious, hungry. "Shirt off."
Bobby did as he was told. As he was told. Something
about that warmed him further. So many different feelings
and different thoughts had been flowing through him over
the last week since he'd finally accepted and voiced that
this with Thor was what he wanted. It was still
overwhelming, still freaking him out in bits and pieces, but
not enough to where he was willing to back off and go back
to how he'd been.
He had no tattoos, no piercings, or any other markings
that would give anyone a hint of who he was. Still, the idea
someone he knew might recognize him made his stomach
quiver with unease.
Once he got the last button undone on his shirt, he
shrugged it off and handed it over to Thor who laid it over
the small table where floggers, whips, acrylic canes, and
riding crops were arranged. Bobby's cock hardened even
more as he took in the array of spanking implements.
"Do you want to pick one out or do you trust me to do it
for you?"
It was a heavy question, that one of trust. Did he trust
Thor? "You."
The only reaction Thor gave was a small quirk of his lips
that no one else could see. "Up on the cross," he said
dismissively while looking through the selections on the
table.
Bobby stared at Thor for a second longer, watched as
his hand would hover over a particular flogger then move to
hover over another. Bobby shook his head and turned
away, pressing himself to the cross as Thor'd instructed.
The wood was cool against his chest and abs. He
arranged each of his legs so his ankles lined up with the
black felt cuffs and did the same with his arms. Mick was
there within a few minutes to fasten the buckles and Velcro
strips. Bobby tried to avoid the other man's eyes, but after
Mick secured the second wrist cuff, Bobby looked over.
"Thank you."
Mick nodded. "Do I know you?"
Bobby sighed. "Yes."
"He know you, too?" Mick flicked his gaze toward Thor.
"Yes."
"This is a big step for him. I knew he liked men, but&"
Mick shrugged. "Just make sure you're in this."
"I am." Bobby turned his head to face forward and
leaned his forehead against the cross. He closed his eyes
and tried to get his erratic breathing under control. "Just
make sure you're in this." The words played themselves
over and over again in his head. He was in this, but Mick's
statement, or warning rather, confirmed what Bobby
already knew. He had to remove the mask tonight.
Hopefully not here, in the club, but it had to come off before
he and Thor parted ways at the end of the evening, before
they could go forward.
Not being able to see Thor and what he was doing, what
flogger or crop he was favoring to use was what Bobby
would define as a complete mind fuck. He'd heard the term
bounced around the club and at private parties for years,
often wondering what it actually meant, but now, he figured
this was as good a definition as any. He was completely in
his own head, thinking, imagining, hoping, dreading,
second-guessing, and about to drive himself crazy at not
being able to see and reassure himself that his trust was
not misplaced. And the longer he had to wait for Thor, the
not misplaced. And the longer he had to wait for Thor, the
worse the anticipation became, until he was ready to crawl
out of his skin and his cock, dear God, his cock hurt.
He was so hard, so in need of release, so in need
of...Thor. Bobby jerked when Thor touched his lower back,
laying his palm against Bobby's bare flesh. He
remembered that touch, the feel of those workman's hands,
the feel of the rough calluses as Thor slid the heel of his
hand up Bobby's spine.
"You okay?" Thor nipped Bobby's ear.
Bobby nodded. "Yeah. Just...nervous." The way they had
to shout at one another took some of the intimacy away but
at the same time, he knew Thor's words were only loud
enough for him to hear and vice versa.
"Nervous is fine. Scared, not so much," the big man said
with a laugh.
Bobby tried a reassuring smile, for both of them, but
wasn't sure he was successful at the gesture. Thor winked
and stepped out of Bobby's view once more. The unease
settled inside again, that nervous anticipation that bordered
on scared. He took a deep breath, counted to fifty, closed
his eyes and thought about all the work sitting in the
passenger seat of his car. He tried to do everything,
anything he could think of to take his mind off what he didn't
know.
Behind him, there was movement, shuffling, Thor and
Mick talking loud enough Bobby could make out their
voices but not their words. Then there was the air whistling
by as flogger tails broke through and Bobby turned his
head in the direction of the sound. Another whooshing
head in the direction of the sound. Another whooshing
sound, this time closer to his skin because he felt the air stir
and the hairs on his arms stood on end. His hands curled
into fists and his thighs tensed with each practice swing
Thor took.
Thor moved in close again, his body pressed into
Bobby's much as it had been in the crowd a little while ago.
If anyone had ever thought they knew for certain that Thor's
sexual preference was female, they were going to be sorely
confused if they were paying attention to the public display
he was giving Bobby. Not to mention, how was Thor hiding
the hard-on under the kilt? Bobby couldn't see it, but he
could sure as hell feel the cock nudging his thigh as Thor
leaned in and talked to him.
"Have you ever been flogged?"
"Once." There was no need to say that it had been done
by a woman because they'd already gone over that last
weekend. Thor was the first man he'd ever submitted to in
any way. He'd been with other men, but as their equal. With
Thor, outside sex and spankings, he wasn't sure how they'd
exist, but he couldn't wait to find out. "Do you remember
your signal?"
"Hit the surface three times."
"Yes. Good. Three times. Knock your fist on the wood
and I'll stop."
"Yes sir."
Thor moaned in Bobby's ear and squeezed his hip. "I've
picked a thick tailed flogger. It won't hurt much. It won't snap
or bite at the skin. It'll feel heavy when makes contact, but in
a very good way. You ready?"
Bobby nodded, unwilling to trust his voice to do more
than croak out the answer. He was ready. He wanted this.
At least that's how he was interpreting the thundering of his
pulse through his body. He might not want the in public
thing, but the rest of it, yes. Tonight's display was for Thor,
was what Thor needed this time and Bobby was more than
willing to give it to him.
"Good."
Thor bit into Bobby's bare shoulder, sucked on the skin
and laved it with his tongue before removing himself from
contact. The act of being marked, and Bobby had no doubt
that was exactly what Thor was doing, marking him, was
more erotic, more intimate than Bobby would have
imagined being surrounded by a few dozen strangers.
He was so busy concentrating on the sting left by Thor's
teeth that he was unprepared for the thud against his back
as the flogger connected with the flesh between his
shoulder blades. He flexed and tensed, waiting for the next
blow. When it didn't come immediately, he fell into his head
again, wondering, anticipating, waiting. He was so focused
on his own thoughts that he'd let his muscles relax and
that's when the blow came, landing in the middle of his
back.
Bobby dropped his head back on his neck and strained
against the wrist cuffs. It didn't hurt, as Thor said it wouldn't,
but there was pressure, a heavy thud, and in the wake of
the tails there was a sense of fulfillment. He wanted more
and more he got. One swipe of the tails against his
shoulders, one down his side, and one particularly pointed
one across his lower back had him bowing in and shivering
in need.
Thor trailed the tails up Bobby's spine and though no
one could hear it, Bobby moaned in pleasure. The light
caress following the heavy pounding made his muscles feel
like jelly. His body relaxed and he dropped his head
forward.
He'd watched Thor often enough to know he should have
never let his guard down. The next kiss from the flogger
came across his ass, hard enough to sting as the tails
wrapped around his hip. The same strike landed in the
same place only the tails wrapped around his other hip.
And then...a barrage along the back of both thighs ending
with a flick of the flogger against his balls which were still
covered by his pants and underwear.
He gasped and if he could have dropped to his knees,
he would have. Instead, he sagged against the wrist cuffs,
panting. Pain and arousal warred inside. He was so fucking
turned on, on a level he couldn't remember ever reaching
before. Cock and ball torture wasn't his idea of fun and he
had never considered pain in his balls arousing, but this
kind, from this man wielding a flogger, oh hell yeah. He
wanted to feel it again, that spike of heat that surged
upward from between his legs to the head of his cock.
Within moments, he got his wish. The tails of the flogger
flew back and forth along the insides of his thighs and once
more ended with a strike against the underside of his balls.
Bobby cried out. His dick throbbed and semen pulsed from
the tip to coat the inside of his boxer briefs. He hadn't
expected it, the orgasm, but he welcomed it, welcomed the
release of the tension in his body. His arms and thighs
shook from strain and he tried to collect himself enough not
to hump the wood he was pressed against.
As he came back to himself, Thor's hand was rubbing
his back in soothing circles and he could hear whispers
around them along with a few moans. His ankles were
uncuffed, then his wrists. Thor draped Bobby's shirt across
his back and held Bobby against him.
"You okay?"
Bobby felt like he'd run a marathon. He was a little shaky
and a bit out of breath still, but otherwise, damn good.
"Yeah." He smacked his lips together. He needed
something to drink, his mouth was dry.
"Let me know when you can stand on your own."
"I can." At least he hoped he could.
Thor let go long enough to gather up his black leather
bag. Mick had packed Thor's instruments inside and was
eying both he and Bobby questioningly.
"Thanks man. I'll catch ya later," Thor said to Mick. He
turned to Bobby. "You sure you're okay to move?"
The intense heat in Thor's eyes and stony facial
expression belied the calm concern in his voice. Bobby
nodded and took one, then two steps to prove himself right.
Thor nodded back and started walking, making his way to
the bar just a few feet away. Before Bobby caught up to
him, Thor had a bottle of water open and waiting.
"Take a drink and follow me."
Bobby took a drink, took a few drinks actually, finishing
off the bottle and depositing it in the trash. Thor again
nodded and turned, walking toward the exit. Bobby could
do, wanted to do nothing more than follow. The wetness in
his pants rubbed against his semi hard cock and wasn't the
most comfortable feeling, but at the same time, it was a
delicious reminder of what had taken place, a new
sensation he'd experienced that he wanted to explore more
of in the future.
As they neared the doors leading outside, Bobby rushed
to keep up with Thor's long strides and to button his shirt
against the crisp Fall air. Thor took the stairs leading to
street level at a near jog and it was then, as soon as Bobby
stepped onto the landing that he realized the mask was
gone. Fuck.
He reached up and touched his face with a sinking
feeling in his gut. He'd been so caught up in everything
else, he'd never noticed when or how the mask came off. It
must have happened when he'd rubbed his face against his
arm or... Damn. He couldn't figure out when it would have
come off or or how. It had been tight enough on his head or
so he'd thought. But that was all beside the point now,
though. Thor knew who he was. Mick knew. Others likely
knew too but he'd been so focused on Thor and on the
things he was feeling inside to notice if anyone recognized
him.
Thor rounded the staircase and headed toward the back
of the building. Bobby wasn't sure if Thor was angry or not,
but he was glad they'd be out of earshot of anyone else
when Thor confronted him. Bobby didn't have to wait long.
Thor dropped his bag to the ground and leaned against
the brick wall of the old warehouse. His face gave nothing
away and that sinking feeling made Bobby feel ill.
"Of all the men... Son of a bitch, Robert. You? The
biggest womanizer I know. Do you know what Aidn would
do to me if he knew?"
Robert was taken aback. "Is that what you're worried
about? What Aidn would do? He's not my keeper and last
time I checked, he wasn't yours either. What does he even
have to do with this?" Robert knew what Aidn had to do
with this. Thor'd felt protective toward Aidn's submissive
Bailey, and now Thor was involving himself with someone
else connected with Aidn.
He didn't think Aidn would take it well, knew he wouldn't
understand why Robert had kept this from him all these
years. Aidn had no issues with bisexuals or gays. He was
equal opportunity when it came to love and relationships.
But he had a thing against lies, against deception.
"He's your friend. He's my friend. Does he even know
you like men?"
Robert looked down and kicked at some loose gravel.
He shoved his hands in his pockets and tired to ignore the
cooling semen inside his underwear. He was no longer
semi hard. "No. No one knows, just like I told you last
weekend. Well, no one except those who were here tonight
who might know me. But, Aidn has nothing to do with this.
This is between us, you and me."
"He needs to know."
"Yes he does. And I'll tell him."
Thor was quiet, his head turned to the side, staring off.
They were in shadow pretty well where they were standing
against the wall, but the lone streetlight at the back corner
of the building kept them from being in pitch blackness.
Robert might have preferred that because personal
confrontation was never his strong suit. He was fierce in
professional confrontation. He could go toe to toe with the
best litigators in the business, but personal confrontation...
He found that easier and best to simply hide from. At the
same time, Thor's strong profile, the solid hardness of his
jaw kept him riveted, kept his own gaze glued to the man.
Robert didn't want to miss anything, not one single thing
about Thor's facial expressions. He wanted to memorize
everything, in case he never had the chance to be alone
with Thor again.
"You like women though."
"I prefer men. I haven't lied to you."
"Omission, Robert. You've lied by omission to all of us."
Thor shook his head and looked straight again, into
Robert's eyes. "If you prefer men, why do you&? Fuck,
man.."
Thor was right. Robert had lied by omission. He'd had
his reasons, but it was a lie all the same. He wasn't proud
of it and wouldn't recommend it, but it was what he'd felt
was the right thing at the time. "Why do I date women all the
time? Because no one knows. Because of the reason I
wore a mask for the last month. Because I was raised to
believe that feeling this way about a guy is wrong. And
forgive me if I overstep here, but you haven't exactly told
anyone either. You haven't let it be known that you prefer
men strapped to your cross."
"No, you're right. I haven't. It's unfair of me to throw
stones when I'm just as guilty. You're ready to come out
now? You're ready to date a man? Go out in public with
him? Hold his hand? Kiss him? You're ready to go through
hell with your family and friends all because of a man?
You're ready for all that?"
Well, when put that way... "Are you?"
But Thor wasn't finished and glossed right over Robert's
question. "And as if all that weren't enough, you're ready to
get on your knees for a man? You're ready to submit and
offer up your ass and your dick for a man?"
"No."
Thor scoffed and thumped his head back against the
brick. "Yeah, I didn't think so. To answer your question, yes.
I just did it. I just came out of the sexual preference closet."
Robert took a tentative step forward. Then another, and
another until he was nose to nose with the angry, long
haired man in a kilt and combat boots. "I can't say I'm ready
one hundred percent," he said quietly, evenly, willing Thor
with his eyes not to push him away. "But, I want to try. With
you. I want to try everything with you."
"Why?"
Thor bit the word out but didn't move and Robert took
that as a good sign. "Because I've watched you for a long
time and of all the men I've met in my business and in my
private life, you're the only man I've ever wanted like this.
I've liked guys before, I've sucked a few, been fucked by a
few, but I want you. Even when my dick is limp as a wet
noodle, I still want you."
Thor eyed him for so long that Robert started to lose
what little bravado he had. Then, the corner of Thor's lips
quirked.
"Wet noodle, huh?"
Not his proudest moment, but Robert would take it.
"Yeah. You really had no idea it was me?"
"Not in a million years would I have guessed you. You
screw around too much with women, stare at most of them
like you're a starving man."
Robert knew his reputation well. "I've had everyone
fooled, I know. It was me I was trying to fool and me who's
ended up the biggest fool of all."
"You didn't know the mask had come off, did you?"
"No. How? When?"
"Mick. The last time the tails slapped against your nuts
he reached over and flipped the mask off. You never knew
and until I actually looked at your face, I didn't know who you
were."
Robert sighed and shook his head. "Mick had no right."
"Mick didn't think it was right for you to keep hiding. I
didn't know he was going to do it and tried to tell him no
when I figured it out. Either way, it doesn't matter now."
"No, I guess it doesn't."
Thor started to reach out but pulled his hand back,
curling his fingers into his palm. Robert winced and lowered
his lashes over his eyes. It was over. Thor couldn't bring
himself to touch him.
Robert tried not to let it hurt, the rejection, but it did. It hurt
like hell, worse than any rejection from a woman ever had.
He'd wanted Thor that bad, enough to put himself on the
line, his pride, his ego. His cover had been blown without
him realizing it and because he'd not had a chance to state
his case first, it was going to cost him a chance with the
man in front of him.
He-
"I guess tonight was a big step for both of us, huh?"
Robert looked up the instant Thor started speaking,
hope filling his chest. "I guess. I didn't want you to find out
quite like this though. About who I am, I mean."
Thor nodded. "I would ask how you'd planned to tell me,
but it doesn't matter now. I know who you are and everyone
inside knows I prefer men. Win win or lose lose, I haven't
figured it out yet."
"You can always shrug it off as a fluke."
"No I can't. To have a man under my control, under my
flogger like I had you tonight, I knew there'd be no going
back. Mick said it showed all over my face, how much I
wanted you, how hungry it made me to kiss your skin with
leather."
Thor reached for him again and this time, his hand
wrapped around the back of Robert's neck. Robert's heart
thumped and his cock started to fill with heat again. Need
flowed through his blood. Perhaps things hadn't been
fucked up.
Thor urged Robert's head close until their foreheads
touched. "This is fucked, man," he whispered, and dipped
his head slightly to kiss Robert's lips.
It was a brief, small contact but it touched Robert deeply.
He inhaled Thor's breath, his scent and let it slide through
his body, filling him. With the next breath, before Thor could
pull away, Robert slowly drew his tongue over Thor's bottom
lip which was quickly sucked into the other man's mouth.
Lightning quick. Thor tightened his grip on Robert's neck
and pulled Robert flush against his body with his other arm.
Their tongues slid and slipped and stroked one another.
Their teeth clicked as the kiss took on a voracious bent,
frenzied and passionate.
Robert had never felt this way, had never been kissed
with as much force and hunger as Thor kissed him. The
rasp of facial scruff rubbed against Robert's lips and chin
made him weak in the knees. Thor was kissing him. He
was kissing Thor. It felt like the most natural thing in the
world. It didn't matter that they were men. It didn't matter that
he'd been so far into his charade of being interested in
women. Nothing mattered in that moment save that they
wanted one another, needed and desired one another. His
teeth scraped against Thor's tongue and the other man
moaned, tightening his grip. Only the need for breath
broken them apart. Robert didn't waste a second, every
word gasped out in his plea. "I want to try, Thor. Please."
He'd begged last weekend behind the mask when he was
naked and hard as a steel pole. Now though, he was fully
dressed with dried cum on his cock, without the mask, his
cock mimicking that steel pole again, but he was willing to
beg for more than a spanking if begging was what he had
to do. "I'm sorry you found out like you did, but I'm glad you
know. I was going to tell you tonight, after& Please, Thor.
Please."
"Do you even know what you're asking please for? Do
you even know what you really want from this?"
"I'm asking for a chance, that's all. Just a chance."
"With me? You're sure of that much? You want this
chance with me?"
"I do."
"Boyfriends? Lovers? Dominant and submissive? A little
spanking, a little bondage? What, Robert? What do you
want a chance with me for?"
"All of it.
Thor didn't say anything else, only let go of the back of
Robert's neck and lifted his head. Robert stepped back,
looking Thor in the eyes. If Thor said no, then he was going
to do it with Robert staring him down. As it was, he couldn't
tell what Thor was thinking. The streetlights were too dim to
make out more than a few facial gestures. A few moments
later though, Thor nodded. "Okay." He leaned down and
picked up his bag, then hefted it over his shoulder and
started walking. "Okay," he said again.
Robert couldn't believe it. For the second time in as
many weeks, Thor was walking away from him. Only this
time, Robert didn't want to be left behind. He wanted to be
taken with Thor. Obviously, Thor didn't want the same thing.
Robert's identity and reputation with women seemed too
much to overcome, too much to deal with if fall-out came.
He sighed. It's not like he blamed Thor for not wanting to
deal with any more shit than being out of the closet was
going bring, but he'd at least hoped they could deal with it
together. He and Thor had been friends of a sort, mostly
through Aidn, before Robert had gotten brave enough to put
a plan in motion to go after the person, the man he wanted.
Now, he wouldn't even have that friendship to call on.
Or maybe Thor just needed some time.
It-
"You coming?"
Robert's gaze shot up. Thor had stopped halfway to the
street and was looking back at Robert. "Coming?"
"Yeah. This way with me."
The man wasn't going to have to ask twice. Robert
jogged to catch up to where Thor stood. "I thought... I mean
you walked away."
"I also said okay."
Thor had him there. Hell, Thor had him, period. Robert
smiled and started walking beside the other man. "Where
are we going?" he asked as they stood on the sidewalk
waiting to cross the street.
"I'm going to my place and you're going home to yours."
Not the answer he was looking for. "Oh."
"Yes sir," Thor corrected.
And just that quick, Robert grinned huge. He didn't have
to see it in a mirror to know. "Yes sir."
"Good. Let's go."
They crossed to the other side of the road and Thor
stopped at a rather large motorcycle and began to strap his
bag to the back.
"A bike? In a kilt?"
Thor grinned over his shoulder as he unzipped the
leather flap and dug around inside. "What of it?" He turned
and handed Robert a card. "My contact info. On the back is
my address. I wrote it out for you. You know, in case you
showed up here this weekend."
"I couldn't stay away," Robert offered softly.
"I'm glad. I want you to take this coming week and really
think about the implications of what all this is gonna mean."
"I don't need to think about it, Thor. Sir." The slight smile
on Thor's lips eased some of Robert's frustration, but not
enough. He didn't want to wait another week. He wanted to
move forward. He wanted to start right now, tonight. He
didn't want to go home alone.
"Maybe not, but I still want you to take it. You have
conversations to have, as do I. I don't intend to do this half
in and half out of the closet. Do you even know how people
you work with are going to react? How they'll handle having
a fellow lawyer with a boyfriend?"
Robert, honestly, hadn't considered anything outside his
personal life. He didn't know how people in his office were
going to take it, were going to feel, or how differently they'd
treat him. "No. But that's my personal life. The only one's
that matter are those that already know I frequent Abyss."
"Frequenting Abyss as a man looking for women is one
thing, but those people don't know you're going to be
frequenting Abyss as mine. I just want you to really, really
think about this. It's a big step for both of us and I'm not
willing to keep it in the dark. I don't intend to send out
announcements or flaunt it, but I won't hide it either."
Robert had to admit, Thor made several excellent points.
And usually, he didn't overlook such obvious things, but he'd
been so gung-ho about getting involved with Thor, he hadn't
given the reaction of others save his family and Aidn a
thought. It was completely understandable and reasonable
that Thor would want to him to be sure. Robert's life was a
little more complicated, a little more visible than Thor's. His
lust and his desire had gotten the best of him and he'd
gotten caught up in the fantasy in his mind. He knew better.
He knew how to look at something objectively and from all
sides. Except this, it seemed.
Thor was thinking with his big brain, whereas most of
Robert's thinking was being done with his little one and his
heart. He took a deep breath and then another. "You're
right, of course."
"You want this, me. I get it. I want it too. I want you. But
we can't go into this half-cocked." Thor's gaze traveled
down the front of Robert's body. He grinned. "Or full-cocked
as it were."
It was dark and cold outside but Robert knew a blush
when he felt one. He lowered his lashes and bit the edge of
his lower lip. He looked up just in time to catch a glimpse of
Thor's ass as he straddled the seat of his bike. Robert
wanted to comment, but chose silence. About that, at least.
"I will give it thought and I will talk to those whom I need to
share this with. Thank you for setting me straight."
Thor smiled. "It's part of my duty to you as dominant. I
need to think rationally and level-headed. I need to maintain
the control. This is new for you and it will take some
adjustment as a submissive. We'll get it worked out."
Robert nodded. "I know." And he did. He knew things
would work out the way they were supposed to. Thor made
sense and Robert needed it. "When do you want to see me
again?"
"Friday night. Midnight. I'll knock off the club early and
meet you there."
"I could come here."
"No. My house. Midnight. If you're not there, I'll assume
you've changed your mind or that this was too much for you
right now."
"I'll call if I change my mind."
"Listen to me. You show up at my place, midnight Friday.
No calls. No texts. No emails. You either show up or you
don't. It's very simple. If you don't show up, I'll call you
Saturday and we'll talk. Oh, and two more things... One,
you won't be Robert to me. Not after this. You're Bobby.
You'll always be Bobby. You okay with that?"
Thor could call him whatever the hell he wanted. Hey You
would work if that's what Thor wanted. But Bobby worked,
too. Bobby worked just fine. He didn't hesitate in his
answer. "Yes sir."
"Two, you aren't to touch your cock. Not for any reasons
beyond pissing and washing until I see you again."
Dear God. He couldn't masturbate? His answer was a
little longer in coming, a little longer in forming. "Y-yes sir."
Thor nodded. "Good boy. Now, go on home. I hope to
see you Friday night."
But before Robert could shift and move away, Thor
reached out and fisted his hand in Robert's shirt, tugging
him forward into a hot, open-mouthed, tongue lashing kiss.
Robert grappled for purchase, for balance and could do no
more than grab onto Thor's shoulders.
Thor gripped Robert's tongue between his teeth and
sucked hard eliciting a moan from deep inside Robert's
chest. Robert tried to grab hold of Thor's tongue to
reciprocate, but couldn't get it before Thor ended the kiss.
If Robert had been hard before, it was nothing compared
to how hard he was now. Steel poles had nothing on his
erection. Thor held him close until Robert's grip on his shirt
eased up. When Thor let him loose, Robert took a shaky
step backward.
Thor winked and started the bike roaring to life. Robert
wanted desperately to climb on the seat behind Thor, but
instead took another couple of steps back. He watched as
Thor settled his helmet on his head, strapped it under his
chin, revved the engine and took off out of the parking lot
and down the street, his hair flying out behind him.
Robert spun on his heel and hurried across a little side
street to the lot where his car was parked. He unlocked the
door and slid down into the soft leather seat with a sigh. A
week. He had to wait another week before he could see
Thor again.
But after that...
He pushed the little engine button and the car purred to
life. He could make it a week. He could do this. He could
make the calls, talk to his parents, talk to Aidn. He could
obey Thor. He could follow the rules.
Six days. He could make it six more days.
About Lissa Matthews
Working from home, baking from scratch, going to
NASCAR races and rock concerts, experimenting with
different coffees, and home schooling her kids, Lissa is
one busy author. To learn more, please visit
www.lissamatthews.com. To contact Lissa, please send an
e-mail to [e-mail].
Find Lissa online:
Twitter: www.twitter.com/lissamatthews
Facebook: www.facebook.com/authorlissamatthews
Also by Lissa Matthews:
Simple Need
Carnal Ecstasy
Ink Spots
The Demon is an Angel
The Swing
Pink Buttercream Frosting
Sugar Rush
Stick Shift
Arrested Holiday
Educating Rose
Charming Lucy
Masked
Series:
Blue Jeans and Hard Hats:
Sweet Caroline
Cracklin' Rosie
Denali Heat:
Arctic Shift
Coming Soon:
Revealed