The greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing the world he didn't exist.

You either surf or you fight.

I love the smell of napalm in the morning... Smells like victory.

When I was here, all I could think of was being there. When I was there, all I could think of was getting back.

First you wanna kill me, now you wanna kiss me.
Good... Bad... I'm the guy with the gun.

It's so small, they recently had the whole country carpeted.

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.

The chip. The British contribution to world cuisine.

You don't wanna get laid, man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you gotta talk to 'em.

Linda Emery: A philosophy major? Now, what can you do with a philosophy major?
Bruce Lee: You can think deep thoughts about being unemployed.

"Shakespeare once said: Life is pretty stupid, with lot's of hubbub to keep you busy, but really not amounting to much...I'm paraphrasing of course." --L.A. Story

Sally:"So a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?" Harry:"No, you pretty much want to nail them, too"

Women, you can't live with 'em, you can't kill 'em.

"An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition! It's not just saying 'no, it isn't'!" - "Yes it is!" - "No it isn't!!"

Men should be like Kleenex- soft, strong and disposable.

Sometimes I even amaze myself.- Han Solo, Empire Strikes Back

Jamie Lee Curtis -"You think your an intellectual, don't you ape?" Kevin Kline -"Apes don't read philosophy." Jamie Lee Curtis -"Yes they do Otto, they just don't understand it!"

"I wasn't kidding. I do have a test today. It's on European Socialism. What's the big deal? I'm not European. I don't plan on becoming European. So why should I care if they're socialists? They could be facist, anarchist pigs. It still wouldn't change the fact that I don't have a car." --Ferris Bueller (Ferris Bueller's Day Off)

-Me and God - we'd be mates!

Some people play hard to get. I play hard to want

Amethea: I'll be no man's slave and no man's whore, and if I can't kill them all, by the gods they'll know I've tried.

Evil Robot Ted: Aim for the cat, dude! Aim for a cat!

Bill S. Preston: You totally killed us, you evil metal dickweeds!

Epstein: Why do you think I'm a homosexual? Eugene: I guess it's because you never talk about girls. Epstein: I
never talk about dogs either. Does that make me a cocker spaniel?

Sgt. Toomey: You would need three promotions to be an asshole.

Deckard: I have had people walk out on me before, but not when I was being so charming.

Leon: Nothing is worse than having an itch you can never scratch!

Leon: Wake up! Time to die

Roy Batty: I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.

Frank Booth: Nobody fucks with me! Jeffrey Beaumont: Oh - maybe if you find the right girl...

Elwood Blues: Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration, don't fail us now!

Elwood Blues: They're not gonna catch us. We're on a mission from God

Elwood Blues: It's a 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses. Jake Blues: Hit it!

Matty Walker: You're not very bright, are you? I like that in a man.

John Bender: But face it. You're a neo maxi zoom dweebie, what would you be doing if you weren't out making yourself a better citizen?

Molly: ...you have no respect for women. Joe: I guess dinner and a blow job's out of the question. Molly: I guess. Joe: We'll forget dinner..

Ugarte: You despise me, don't you? Rick Blaine: If I gave you any thought I probably would.

Yvonne: Will I see you tonight? Rick Blaine: I never make plans that far ahead.

Rick Blaine: And remember, this gun is pointed right at your heart. Captain Louis Renault: That is my least vulnerable spot.

Wife: Didn't your mother teach you to wash your hands after you went to the bathroom? Bobby Grady: No, she taught me not to piss on my fingers

Juliette Forrest: What does "Foc" mean? Rigby Reardon: It's a slang word. When a man and a woman are in love, the man puts his--- Juliette Forrest: No, no. Here: "F. O. C."

Rigby Reardon: My plan was to kiss her with every lip on my face.

Big Boy Caprice: Wait a minute! Wait. Wait. I'm having a thought. Oh yes. Oh yes. I'm going to have a thought. It's coming. It's coming. ...It's gone.

Elliot: How do you explain school to a higher intelligence?

Han Solo: That's a good story. I think you just can't bear to let a gorgeous guy like me out of your sight.
Princess Leia Organa: I don't know where you get you delusions, laser brain!

C-3PO: R2 says that the chances of survival are 725 to 1. Actually R2 has been known to make mistakes - from time to time... Oh dear...

Princess Leia Organa: I love you. Han Solo: I know.

Demon: I'll swallow your soul!! I'll swallow your soul!! [Ash points his shotgun at the Demon's head] Ash: Swallow this

William "D-FENS" Foster: I'm the bad guy??? How did that happen?

George Banks: And don't forget to fasten your condoms! ...Seatbelts, I mean seatbelts.

Ferris Bueller: Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you would have a diamond.

Ed Rooney: I don't trust this kid any farther than I can throw him. Grace: With your bad knee Ed, you shouldn't throw anybody.

Ming the Merciless: Pathetic earthlings. Who can save you now?

Kees Flodder: He Sjonny, geile wijfe!

Forrest's Mother: Life is like a box of chocolates, Forrest. You never know what you're gonna get

Brian Kelly: Can I ask you something personal? Tina Trac: Sure... Brian Kelly: Where's the bathroom?

James Bond: Do you expect me to talk? Auric Goldfinger: No Mr. Bond! I expect you to die!

Manolo: You must be Sasha. Jonathan: You must be going.

Phil Connors: Can I talk to you about a matter that is not work-related? Rita: You never talk about work.

Felix's Wife: Dr. Connors. I want to thank you for fixing Felix's back. He can even help around the house
again. Phil Connors: I'm sorry to hear that, Felix

David Greenhill: ..see people like us Miriam, we're ... we're warm; but she's a ... she's an attorney.

Kurgan: Nuns. No sense of humor
It's better to burn out, than to fade away!

Myerson: Now I know what the FBI stands for. `Fucking, Ball-busting Imbeciles'!

Ed Okin: Are we under arrest or what? FBI Agent: I think you fall into the 'or what' category.

Mr. Miyagi: No such thing, bad student. Only bad teacher.

George Kuffs: I got women to do, places to see!

Baldrick, you wouldn't recognize a cunning plan if it painted itself purple, danced on a harpsycord and sang: 'Cunning plans are here again'.

The certain proof that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that no one has bothered to make contact with us

Going to church does not make you a Christian anymore than going to the garage makes you a car

It is impossible to make anything foolproof, because fools are so ingenious.

If my grandmother had balls, she'd be my grandfather.

Flattery is all right, if you don't inhale.

Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original and the part that is original is not good.

That's a great outfit you're wearing . . . I have just the perfect hanger for it.