One Shot: Reflections on the Life of A.W. Tozer

Sep 10th, 2008

by BryanP.

http://www.fireonyourhead.org/2008/09/10/shot-reflections-life-aw-tozer/

I am just finishing up a new biography on one of the most beloved prophet-hearted teachers in American history. It's entitled A Passion for God: The Spiritual Journey of A.W. Tozer, and it's written by Lyle Dorsett. I have long loved Tozer's writings and messages. For over a decade I've relished in his insights and fed off of his knowledge of God, and the intensity of his worshipping heart. I've read some of the other bio's on A.W., but this biography is a real gem, and I'm commending it to all of the pastors and laborers in our fellowship here in Kansas City.

It tells of his formation as a man of prayer and incessant worship. It tells of the trials he endured and the stretchings he experienced. It inspires us to forsake a vain pursuit of ministry-breadth, and calls us back to the pursuit of depth in the secret place. Tozer's relentless longing for the presence and person of God grabs us by the collar of our professional or subjective ideas on ministry, and plops us down in the dust on the backside of the desert. Before long we see the glow of the bush again, and remember why and how we ever put our sandals back on and proceeded to face the people.

I am jolted again. This man labored for 4-plus decades- contending for the faith, reaching out to souls in darkness, setting aright faddish movements and faulty doctrines. Most of all, every soul that was remotely close to A.W. Tozer knew that there were at least 5 hours a day where he was intently removed from all contact with anyone other that the God of Majesty. He knew what it was to behold the uncreated One, to love Him, to listen to Him, to gaze upon Him with delightful and sometimes awe-full attentiveness. He didn't need adrenalin, entertainment, or programmatic pick-me-ups to bear up his walk with the Lord. He had what Moses had…what David had…what the prophets had…what Paul had. He had a singleness of heart in pursuit after the God of Israel, and he was not willing for anything to stand in the way of that impassioned vision.

I wonder how far we have fallen from this kind of Davidic intensity.

Still, there is another stinging thing in the story of A.W. Tozer. Many believers who have been profoundly affected by his teachings are unaware of the manner of his life at home, and even the manner of his death. He died in a Canadian hospital room in the year of 1963. He was all by himself. He was alone in his death as he was in his life.

One of his colleagues noted that one of the last remarks he ever heard Tozer make was this:

“I have had a lonely life.”

The young revivalist may read this and unleash a heroic cry: “Yes! This is the price that every true man of God pays. You cannot follow the Lord and make friends with every one around you.”

Indeed, this is true. When we cling to the Lord in this life, there will be great opposition and trial. But mere loneliness is not a sign of prophetism, and isolation from family and friends is not necessarily a hallmark of an eternity-centered life. We were created for community.

As Gordon Fee points out, the idea of salvation in the mind of Paul was never primarily a thought toward whether an individual person would be able to make it to heaven or not. Salvation, in the hebraic mind of the early apostles, was a picture of God's Kingdom breaking into a society and wrenching loose a group of souls from the spirit of this age, that they might be formed and fashioned together by the power of the Spirit into a Body that expresses the very nature of Christ. In other words, we need Christ (!), but we are not likely to experience Him fully if we don't also experience Him through our experiences in family life and church life.

Life is a fragile thing. “Man is but a mere breath,” the psalmist declares (Psm. 144.4a). I wept on numerous occasions in the reading of Tozer's biography. For the first time I saw areas of his life that I had never seen before. Gaping holes. Perhaps he was oblivious to them. Perhaps his engagement with ministry travels, reading, writing, preaching, and the remarkable amount of time he spent in “speechless adoration” of Christ filled his plate to the extent that he was incapable of figuring in other necessary Kingdom responsibilities and privileges.

The most heart-wrenching of these blind-spots was his inability, over the course of 40-plus years, to connect relationally with his wife Ada and their 7 children. He also struggled with connecting relationally to the vast majority of the saints who were under his care for all of those decades. They say that he and Ada never fought or argued (as best as we know), nor was there ever a known issue of infidelity or abuse. There was simply this radical, unexplainable inability to relate with his wife and kids to the extent that he would be a presence in their lives. He would be drawn to them as long as they were babies, but when it got past that, he struggled to father them. The story goes that his father was a hardworking farm-man who was quite non-relational himself. I would assume that this passed to his sons and daughters, and it certainly seems that way with A.W.

When Tozer died, though Ada had scarcely (if ever) complained about their distant relationship, she made several things clear. Both she and the children (all adults by the time of his death) were in agreement that they knew very little about this man whose teachings and writings have sent waves of revelation through many hungry hearts. This, to me, is a tragedy of tragedies.

It is not enough to say that “a prophet is not without honor except in his own town.” (Mt. 13.57) Too long have preachers been presumptuously putting themselves in the sandals of Jesus, and blaming the unhealthy condition of their families on the requirements of ministry. We are not Jesus, friends.

Most of us have spouses. Most of us have children. What shall they declare at our funerals? What will our children leave with when they move on into adulthood?

I was told that after A.W. died, Ada was asked if she missed him. She had been re-married by this time. Her reply was tragic to me. She said something like this: “A.W. was God's man, but my new husband is my man.” Oh, that it would not be said of us! May we be wholly given to Him, and to those whom He has given us.

Ironically, a few weeks ago I had just picked up this Tozer bio, and was really getting into it. The kids were playing outside so I decided to sit on the patio in my chair. The plan was to get into the bio (I have a thing for books, in case you didn't know) while being close enough to supervise the children. As I was reflecting on the fact that Tozer's children barely knew him, I was looking at his face on the front of the book. Just then, my son Simeon said,

“Daddy, will you play ball with me?”

There was a trembling that went through my soul, and it was as if Tozer was bellowing from the heavens, “Bryan! Don't look at him the way I looked at mine. Look him in the eye. He is a little boy with a soul, and with his own thoughts, and he is sensitive to you. His heart is beating for you to father him. He is awaiting you, and he will never forget your response to him in this moment. There is a vast difference between 'supervision' and fathering.”

I set the book down, and played catch with my son.

I do tremble, friends. I tremble at the busyness of our American ways. I tremble at the awesome responsibility and privilege of raising these boys and girls. I weep over the fact that it is so easy for us to be engaged in ourselves- even religiously- to the neglect of our spouses, or children, or congregation members, or unbelieving neighbors.

As I was praying into this some days later, I had a strong word of Fatherly caution from the Lord:

“You've got one shot at this, son.”

18 or 20 years is all we have with our children. What shall they take from us? Will they feel like it was a mere obligation for us to feed them and care for them? Will they feel like we really didn't want them around? Will they feel like all of our talk about the nature of God was mere flourish or rhetoric? Will they feel that they are valued and cherished? Will they have been fathered? mothered? Or just raised? I believe that God desires to give us wisdom and love enough to be a literal representation of Himself in the home. We will certainly miss the mark here and there, but He will enable us to actively engage them with a whole heart. To hear them, for real. To speak into them, for real. To love them, for real. That's fathering and mothering, and it's an awesome privilege available to us all.

“One shot…”

The great revivalist Leonard Ravenhill, who was in many ways mentored by Tozer, used to say that you can't catch up your prayer life when you get to the judgment seat of Christ. I certainly agree, and he was a man to back up his talk with a real value for prayer and intercession.

I'd like to acknowledge another cut in this fine diamond of discipleship. We can't catch up our parenting, or the way we treated our spouses, or the depth of our humility toward others at the judgment seat either. We have one shot, saints. It will be a journey, and we will all trip up and fall in one way or another along the way. But abandoning ship is not an option. We've got to face our spouses, face our children, face our congregations, knowing that we've got “one shot” with all of them.

Whitefield said to speak every time as if it were our last, and “compel them to cry, `Behold, how He loves us.'”

I want to burn with a passion for God like Tozer did. I want to know the long seasons of adoration, awe, and intercession. I want to stand as a pillar in the household of faith. I want to exalt Christ and cling to the cross, fixing my eyes on Him while the latest fads rise and fall.

I also want to love and tremble toward those who are closest and most familiar to me. We all have those who are most familiar…spouses, children, parents, neighbors, fellow believers. I want to see a generation of preachers raised up who are aware of the mercies of God, are immersed in His love, and who walk with a “one shot” consciousness. They look at each person with a radical value, a Spirit-dependent outlook. They make priority for prayer and scripture as Tozer did, while stretching out the tent of time and relationship for those whom the Lord has given them.

Every occasion is another “shot.” Every conversation with the wife…”one shot.” Every seemingly irrelevant question from a child…”one shot.” Every interaction with an unbeliever…”one shot.” Every time of secret prayer and scripture reading…”one shot.” Every opportunity to father our sons and daughters…”one shot.” The self-absorbed are distracted, double-minded and cowardly. But the true servant of the Lord sees the “one shot” and takes it, while others are passing by as the proverbial stranger in a rush-hour traffic jam. May our eyes be opened to see that every occasion is another shot at learning and dispensing the very love of Christ.

Teach us to number our days aright,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
May your deeds be shown to your servants,
your splendor to their children. - Psalm 90.12, 16

A Passion for God

The Spiritual Journey of A.W. Tozer

http://www.discerningreader.com/book-reviews/a-passion-for-god

Book Details

• Author: Lyle Dorsett

• Publisher: Moody Publishers (2008)

• Category: Biography

Discerning Reader Editorial Review

Reviewed 05/14/2008 by Scott Lamb.

Recommended. A biography that is both inspiring and troubling.

For the purpose of this review, I will assume you have at least a little knowledge of A.W. Tozer. If you don't then just stop reading this right now and go get yourself a copy of his books - The Pursuit of God or The Knowledge of the Holy.

This new biography of Tozer by Lyle Dorsett is both inspiring and troubling.

The inspiration comes from imagining that I too could gain such an interest in the Savior as did Tozer. I like to think I too could come to the point in my prayer life where I wore out the knees of my pants praying with an informed head and an enflamed heart. Taking note of Tozer's forthright speech in the pulpit, I hope to speak the truth with little, if any, fear of man residing in my heart. To eschew riches, to not be a slave to modern entertainment and distraction, to be a lifelong learner, to work hard till my dying day - these are all things that Dorsett' wonderful biography of Tozer bring to my mind, inspiring me to follow in his footsteps.

However, showing himself once again to be a good biographer, Dorsett also brings forth troubling aspects of the life of Tozer. From the beginning of the book to the end, Tozer's loneliness, his aloofness and neglect of his wife, his emotional absence in the life of his children - these aspects of Tozer's life were deeply troubling. They are troubling not because I am shocked that a great man of God could have shortcomings, but because deep down I know that I am a spiritual pygmy compared to Tozer… so what are my blind spots and who am I hurting?

 

Regarding Tozer's strengths, Dorsett writes:

“A.W. Tozer heralded biblical truth. He loved the Bible and unflinchingly preached what he believed people needed to hear, regardless of what they wanted.”

            and

“Like the ancient Hebrew prophets, Tozer alienated religious leaders. He spoke publicly of his disdain for materialism, consumerism, and worldliness, wherever he detected it infiltrating the church.”

            and

“There is no way to measure the hours he spent in a typical day or week reading books and wrestling with ideas, but it was substantial. In a similar vein, we know that he increasingly devoted many hours each week praying, meditating on Scripture, and seeking deeper intimacy with the Lord Jesus Christ. During the 1930s Tozer read voraciously, and he also developed a magnificent obsession to be in Christ's presence- just to worship Him and to be with Him.

However, in revealing the lack of family intimacy between Aiden and his wife Ada, Dorsett writes:

“Aiden's traveling schedule wounded Ada. Consequently, their marriage never knew the intimacy for which she so deeply longed. As painful as this reality became to Ada- and there is no evidence that Aiden ever longed for more than a surface relationship- she learned to cope. During the West Virginia years Ada found ways to put on a mask of contentment, and she channeled her affections to the children and needy families in the church.

            and

“By early 1928 the Tozers had a routine. Aiden found his fulfillment in reading, preparing sermons, preaching, and weaving travel into his demanding and exciting schedule, while Ada learned to cope. She dutifully washed, ironed, cooked, and cared for the little ones, and developed the art of shoving her pain deep down inside. Most of the time she pretended there was no hurt, but when it erupted, she usually blamed herself for not being godly enough to conquer her longing for intimacy from an emotionally aloof husband.

And the lack of intimacy existed between he and his seven children too:

“It is true that all seven children remembered periodic outdoor walks or the occasional times to shoot a rifle at attic or basement targets. But with the exception of Rebecca- the youngest- they all felt somewhat estranged from their father, albeit in differing degrees depending upon age. Lowell, the oldest, sardonically stated that his mother was a “single parent.” The other boys did not use identical language but they all acknowledged that even though their father was kind and never abusive, they felt they never knew him. Not one son said he experienced intimacy with his father.

Given his ministry of preaching the Word, it astounded me to read Dorsett's words regarding Tozer's practice, or lack thereof, of family worship:

“On and off over the years, Aiden exercised his role as head of the family by encouraging times of family devotions. These never lasted more than a few weeks. As one son explained, the children just did not want it and they were seldom all together for extended periods in any case.

Tozer's thoughtlessness extended to financial concerns, never purchasing a car for the family even with seven children to care and provide for. Dorsett gives this anecdotal evidence:

“The woman [Ada] was left to shift for herself and her busy husband refused to invest in a car. Clara Moore remembered “Mrs. Tozer coming to church freezing from the long cold walks in the winter.” Clara saw her “trying to bum rides to get places.” In brief, it seemed to this young woman [Moore] that for Mrs. Tozer, life was “very hard for her.”

Dorsett wraps up Tozer's legacy as a family man in this manner, “For numerous and perhaps tangled reasons, Aiden Tozer increasingly found time to invest in people other than his sons and wife.” He also quotes Ada's words about her husband, coming several years after his death when she herself was experiencing joy in a new marriage to a widower:

“My husband was so close to God, a man of such deep prayer, always on his knees, that he could not communicate with me or our family. No one knew what a lonely life I had, especially after the kids left home.” How ironic and sad that Ada Tozer experienced such loneliness when Aiden was overheard commenting to a pastor not long before he died: “I've had a lonely life.”

Dorsett does let the reader know that something good was obviously going on in the home, and that by God's grace, it can be written of Tozer's children:

“All seven of Tozer's children became solid Christians and not one of them carried bitterness in their heart toward their father. Each one became relatively successful by the world's standards and functioned quite well in society, and they all expressed gratitude to God for their mother and father and with good reason.”

In closing this review, I have emphasized all these negative qualities of Tozer's life as a family man only because this was a main emphasis of the book. On one hand, it is obvious that Dorsett greatly admires Tozer and assumes the reader already does too. Therefore, great pains are taken to avoid the charge of writing hagiography, seeing no faults in the life of the one being examined. Certainly Dorsett does not fall into that error.

The book itself contains some repetitiveness in that Dorsett will reuse an anecdote several times giving the reader a sense of déjà vu. Also, I really desired to learn more about Tozer's “mysticism”. In reading the biography it seems as though if Tozer was mystic, that word simply means he was a man given much to prayer and Scripture meditation. Certainly that is not all there was to it though, and I would have liked to have heard more about it. Also, since Tozer was involved in the Keswick movement, what national leaders did he interact with? What did they think of him? Further, Dorsett mentions ministerial criticism of Tozer, but does not provide any of the details. So, my main critique is simply that I wish the biography was 400 pages instead of 200.

There is much more to say about this book, including an interesting connection between Tozer's Chicago church and the current news conversation regarding Rev. Jeremiah Wright. But time escapes me for now, so let me encourage you to pick up a copy of Dorsett's work - it will both delight and depress you. But in doing so, I think this biography will transform your own ministry, both in your church and in your home.

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