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WildNight

CathrynFox

ChapterOne

Raelynn

Notthisagain!

Christ,Iamsosickandtiredofeveryonemistakingmeformytwinsister,Saralynn.

I’mnother.Don’twanttobeher.Ever.Imeanwhowouldwantallthemediaattention,

everyhotguyintheuniversedroolingatyourmanicuredtoes,allthewomenintheworld

dressinglikeyouandsingingyoursongs.Certainlynotme.

Yeahright.

Wemightlookalike,butmysisterclearlyhasasparkthatIlack,asparkthathas

broughtherfameandfortuneinthemusicbusiness,reachingdoubleplatinumwithher

lastalbum.Me,well,Icouldn’tcarryatuneinabucket.ThelasttimeItriedtosing,one

ofmyneighborsknockedonmydoor.ApparentlytheythoughtIwasinsidetorturinga

cat.Whatthehell,right?Ilovecats.Whichisagoodthing,becausethewaymylovelife

isgoing,I’llsoonbecollectingthem.

Istoppedtryingtohonemyvoiceafterthat,leavingthestagetomyverytalentedsister,

whoIlovetrulyanddearly.I’mbetteroffstickingtomydayjob,teachingwork/life

balancetostressed-out,overworkedemployees.It’sajobIlove,andwhileIresigned

myselftothefactthatIcan’tsing,itdoesn’tstopmefrombeltingoutlyricsintheshower

everynowandthen.Wherenoonecanhear,ofcourse.

“Saralynn,waitup,”themanacrossthestreetscreamsout,franticallywavingwhat

lookslikearestaurantnapkinintheair.

Ishouldjuststopandgivehimanautograph,pretendtobemysister,whoiscurrently

backhomehereinBaltimore,takingashowbusinessbreakatourfolks’house—hencethe

frenzyoffansonthestreetslookingforher.Thenagain,wehadn’tplayedtheswitcheroo

gamesincewewerekids,andifIstopforoneman,soonenoughI’llbeswarmed,drawing

unwantedattentionfromhundredsofguys.UnlikeSaralynn,I’montheshysideand

prefertokeepalowprofile,andallthatmaleattentionwouldbehorrible,right?

Yeahright.

Thenagain,shedidhaveastalkeracoupleyearsago,andthatwasprettydamnscary

forallofus.Ashiverskipsdownmyspine,andthehairsonthebackofmynecktinglein

warning.SinceI’mnotonetoignoremyintuition,Ipickupthepaceandroundthecorner.

“Look,it’sSaralynn,”anotherguyyells,andwhenIhearnumerousfootstepspounding

thepavementbehindme,Ipanic.Whatifit’sanotherstalker?Myjogturnsintoafull-on

run—adifficulttaskinapencilskirtandheels.Iscanthestreet,eagertofindaplaceto

hideoutbeforeIgetbombarded—orkidnapped.Yes,Idohaveawildimagination.

IglanceupintimetoseePat’sIrishPub.IusedtogotohighschoolwithSeanCollins,

whosefamilyownstheplace.WhatwouldSaralynndoinasituationlikethis?Itryto

thinklikeher,andinstantlyanideatakesform.Ipullopenthedoor,stealaquickglance

arounduntilIfindthebiggestguy,thenrushuptohim.

“Thereyouare,”Isay,asthedoorflingsopensbehindme,mysister’sfeverishfans

racingafterme.

Astheguysetshismotorcyclehelmetonthetable,andpeelsaleatherjacketfromhis

hardbody,Igouponmytoes,slidemyhandsoverhisbroadshoulders,andkisshimright

onthelips.

Hegoesstill,hislipsfrozeninplace,asIstealasidewaysglanceandtakeinthemenat

thedoor.Ilookbackatmypretendboyfriend;catchtheflickeroffamiliarityinhisblue

eye.Heblinks,angleshisheadtoseethemenwho’vefollowedmein,thenturnsbackto

me.Understandingdancesinhiseyes,andI’mgratefulthatunderneathahard,inked

body,theguyhasabrain.

Heslideshisbighandsaroundmywaistanddragsmetohim.Wow,thatprobably

shouldn’tfeelsonice.

“I’vewaitedmywholelifeforthis,”hewhispers,thedeeprumbleinhisvoicedoing

ridiculousthingstothedormantspotbetweenmylegs.Hegrinsandplaysalong,

obviouslyhavingputtwoandtwotogether—I’mfamoussingerSaralynnWalker,tryingto

deteragroupofmenfromswarmingme.Hislipsfindmineagain,andhepicksmeclear

offthefloorashekissesme,lettingthemenintheroomknowI’mofflimitsandthey

betterbackoff,orelse…

Thedoorslamsshut,andIfeelameasureofcomfort.Withthemobgone,Ishould

breakthekiss,putanendtothecharade.Yeah,Ishouldprobablystoptouchinghim,

kissinghimback,imaginingwhathislethalbodywouldfeellikenaked,lyingovermine.

Sowhyaren’tI?

Oh,probablybecauseIhaven’tbeenkissedlikethisin…ever.Histongueslidesinto

mymouth,tangleswithmine,andagroanIhavenocontrolovercrawlsoutofmythroat.

Isheevenawaretheguysaregone?Thatwenolongerhavetoputonashow?

God,Ihopenot.

Heangleshishead,thekissdeepening,expanding,andmytraitorousnipplesharden,

pressagainsthischestthroughmyblouse,alertinghimtomyarousal.Whensomeone

nearbyclearstheirthroat,andmumblessomethingaboutgettingaroom,hebreaksthe

kiss,butcontinuestoholdmeagainsthisrock-hard,solidbody.

“They’re…gone,”Isaybreathlesslyandgesturewithanodtowardthedoor.“Thanks

for…help…ing…me.”Whatisgoingonwithmyvoice?Singingmightbeoutofthe

question,butnowIcan’teventalk?Goodlord.Hishandsslackenaroundmyribcageand

Islidedownhisbody,enjoyingeverygloriousinchashesetsmebackonmyfeet.

“Anythingforyou,”hesays.

MorelikeanythingforSaralynn.

Heangleshishead,thatsparkoffamiliaritybackinhiseyes.Heopenshismouthto

saysomething,andIblurtout,“I’mSaralynnWalker.”

OMFG.WhatthehellamIdoing?

Hefrowns,andlooksdownforamoment,likehe’stryingtopiecesomethingtogether.

Whenhisgazeliftsbacktomine,andblackpupilsexpand,bleedintohisgorgeousblue

irises,mystomachflutters.

Whattheever-lovingfuckisgoingonwithme?Inkedbikerdudeishot,drop-dead

gorgeousforsure,butnoman—astrangeratthat—hadeverturnedmykneestoJell-O

before.Ipulsedeepbetweenmylegs,andI’msureifIsqueezethemtogetherI’llorgasm

rightonthespot.

“Iknowwhoyouare,”hesays,andforaseconditseemslikehecanseethroughme,

righttomylie.Butthat’simpossible.Wedon’tknoweachother.“I’mNate.”

“Nate…”Isay,tryingitoutonmytongue,wonderinghowitwouldsoundwhenI’m

pinnedbeneathhim,scoringhisskinwithmynailsashefillsme,bringingmetosweet

release.TheonlytimeI’deverbeenabletoclimaxwaswithMr.Right—theman-made

boyfriendIkeeptuckedawayinmynightstanddrawer.DamnedifIdon’twanttogive

thisguyachancetotrythough.Ijustbethe’sveryfamiliarwithawoman’sbodyandhow

tosendherfreefallingwithoutanet.

Igiveashakeofmyheadasmythoughtsrunawayfromme.Jeez,it’sclearI’vegone

toolongwithoutaman’stouch,ifI’mstandingheredroolingoveracompletestranger.

Getittogether,Rae.

Asexygrinrevealsadimpleonhisleftcheek.Despitejustsilentlylecturingmyself,I

takehimin,letmygazeroamoverhisface.DoIknowhim?Nah,I’dneverforgetaguy

likeNate.

“I’dshakeyourhand,butIthinkwe’rewellpastthat,don’tyou?”heteases.

“Yeah,”Ireply.“Thanksforthat.”

“Hard,huh?”hesays.

Ifalterbackwardsslightly,andmygazedashestohiscrotch.Holyshit,whatamI

doing?He’snottalkingabouthimselfbeinghard,althoughhedoeshaveaverynicebulge

happeninginhiscurrentun-arousedstate.Whatthehellisheworkingwithdownthere?

Idareyoutofindout.

Wait!What?No.No.No.Isilentlychanttohushthatinnervoice.

WhythehellamIthinkingaboutthisguy’scock?

Oh,maybebecauseMr.Rightjustisn’tcuttingitanymore,andthisguy—Mr.Wrong

insomanyways—hasdirtysexwrittenalloverhim.Dirtysexlikemysisterprobablyhas

allthetime.Yeah,thatmustbeit.AndthatmustbewhyI’mpretendingtobeSaralynn.

BecauseIwantsomeheadboard-banginglove,too,dammit.

“Areyouokay?”

“What…oh,hard.Yeah,hard.”Whatisheeventalkingabout?

Herocksonhisfeet,hisbodyswayingtowardmine.“Hereyouare,backinyour

hometowntorestandrelax,andyoucan’tevenwalkdownthestreetwithoutgetting

accosted.”

Ishouldgo.Pretendingtobemysistercanonlyleadtotrouble.

“Thanks,Nate.I’vetakenupenoughofyourtime.”

“Wait.”Hishandtouchesmyarm,andwhenthesexygrinmaterializesagain,afine

shiverracedownmyspine.“Youkissedme,andwell,believeitornot,Ineverkissonthe

firstdate,”hesays.

Ibelievehim…not.

“Therearerulesyouknow?”hesays,mischiefdancinginhisgorgeouseyes.

“Youdon’tstrikemeasthekindofguywhoplaysbytherules.”Assoonasthose

wordsleavemymouth,hisgrinisback,doingridiculouslydeliciousthingstotheneedy

juncturebetweenmylegs.God,whyamIexchangingplayfulbanterwithaguylikethis?

He’sprobablyinabikergang,andifIknewwhatwasgoodforme,I’drunathousand

milestheotherway.

Sowhyaren’tI?

“Youshouldatleastbuymeabeerorsomething,”hesays.

Iputonehandonmyhip.“Youkissedme,too.”Withoutthinkingaboutit,Itouchmy

lips,revelinthehotburnhismouthleftbehind.WhenIrealizewhatI’mdoing,Iholda

fingerupandcircleit.“Andthisisn’tadate.”

Hegivesacausalshrug.“Thenletmebuyyouabeer,makethisofficial.”

“Makewhatofficial?”

“Thisdate.Sincewealreadygotthefirstkissoutoftheway,havedinnerwithme.”

“I…”Ilookaroundthebusybar,mymindgoingtoSeanCollinswhenIseeafewof

hissiblings.LastIheard,hewaslivingwithLaurenandChad.He’dfoundlove,and

undoubtedlyamazingsex,withtwopeople,anddammit,Ican’tevenfinditwithone.

WhileI’vegivenuponfindinglove—andcertainlydon’texpecttofinditwithinked

bikerdude—maybeIshouldstayandhavedinnerwithhim.Maybeamealwillleadto

hot,straight-updirtysexinahotelroomwithMr.Wronghimself.Onewildnightwitha

guyI’llneverseteyesonagain.

Yeah,maybepretendingtobemysisterwasn’tsuchabadideaafterall…

“Okay,”Isay,andslideintothebooth,hardlyabletobelievewhatI’mdoing.Thisisso

notlikeme,butrightnowI’mnotme.I’mSaralynn.

Hedropsdownacrossfromme,hisgazelatchedonmine.“Sincewealreadykissed,are

weconsideringthisourfirstdateorsecond?”heasks,hisvoiceteasing.

“What?”Lord,whycan’tIkeepaclearthoughtaroundhim?“Whatdoesthatmatter?”

“Itmattersbecauseoftherules.”

Iarchabrowandwonderwhatkindofgamehe’splaying.“Maybeyoushouldtellme

whatyoursecond-daterulesarebeforeIanswer.”

HeleanstowardmeandIcatchawhiffofhisscent.Warmleather,hotman,and

somethinguniquelyNate.HeisseriouslythehottestguyI’veeverseteyeson,andIcan’t

helpbutwanttocheckoutthebig-assequipmenthe’sworkingwithbetweenhislegs.His

eyesracesovermyface,thenhewetshislipsashisgazedips.

“Actually,I’drathershowyou.”

OMFG…

ChapterTwo

IhavenoideawhyRaelynnispretendingtobeherfamoussister,Saralynn.Forthelast

forty-fiveminutes,she’snotdroppedtheact,butthesecondsheenteredtheroom,Iknew

itwasher.Shehasadefinitesweetnessabouther,ashynessthatdrewmetoherinhigh

school.Asaself-proclaimedgamergeek,girlslikehersisterneverpaidmealickof

attention.No,theyweretoobusywiththeboysonthefootballteam.Butsweetbookworm

girlslikeRae,well…theywerealwayskindandthoughtful.It’shardtobelievethattwins

raisedinthesamehouseholdcouldgrowuptobesodifferent.

Christ,I’dwantedtoaskheroutbackintheday,makehermygirl,butIdidn’thavethe

ballstodoit.Now,well,myballsareplentybigandthistime,therearealotofthingsI

wanttodowithher.It’sclearshedoesn’trecognizeme.Whywouldshe?Incollege,Ihit

thegym,putonweight,lostthebraces,andgotadamnhaircut.Underneathitall,I’mstill

agamergeekthough,andjusttransferredbacktoBaltimoretotaketheleadprogrammer

positionatDataSolutions’headquarters.

Itakethelastbiteofmyhamburgerandwashitdownwithamouthfulofbeer.Across

fromme,RaesipsherwineandnibblesonaFrenchfry,allthewhilepretendingtobe

someonesheisn’t.Whyisthat?Inhighschool,shewasalwaysintheshadowofher

flamboyantsister.Howanyonecouldoverlookherisbeyondme.Isshetiredofthat?

Pretendingtobehersisterbecausethegoodgirlwantstobebad?

Imullthatoverforamoment,andmycocktwitches,becauseyeah,Iwanttobethe

guyshegetsbadwith—atleastthisway,I’llknowshe’llbetakencareofproperly.

Seriouslythough,howdidIevergetsofuckingluckytobeattherightplaceattheright

time?

Iwanttoknowwhatshe’sbeenuptosincegraduation,andaskherwhatshedoesfora

living,butthenI’dbeoutingher.Ifshe’sdeterminedtokeepherrealidentityasecret,I’ll

playalong.Fornow.

Shewipeshermouthwithhernapkinandlick’sherbottomlipassheset’stheserviette

onherlapliketheproperlittlegirlsheis,andmydickthrobsassheleavesawetsheen

behind.

I’vebeensemi-hardsinceshefirstpressedthosesoftlipstomine.Fuck,Iwanther.

Alwayshave,whichiswhyIletherknowI’drathershowhermydate-tworules—her

naked,beneathme,allnightlong.I’mnottheshykidfromhighschoolanymore,and

whenwekissed,Icaughtthesparkofinterestinhereyes,notedthewayshemeltedinto

me.There’srealheatbetweenus,andthatdoesn’tcomealongeveryday.

“Dessert?”Iask.

“No.I’mgood,thanks.Yougoaheadandorderifyouwant.”

“I’msavingmydessertforlater,”Isayblatantly,andherbreathcatches.Webothknow

what’sgoingonbetweenus,andI’mnotabouttohidemyinterest.Nope,I’mlayingit

rightoutthere,nosecretsonmyend,andwhathappensnextisuptoher.“Wanttogetout

ofhere?”Iaskasshefinishesherwine.

Shestealsaquickglanceatthedoor,andIcatchameasureofworryinhereyes.“Yeah,

weshouldgo.”

“Doyouthinkyourmobisgone?”

Shenods.“Probably.”

Itossafewbillsontothetable,morethanenoughtocoverourmealandsay,“Still,you

shouldstayclosetomejustincase,andifyouhavetokissmeagain,feelfree.”

Colormovesintohercheeks.Thatsexyblushprovesshe’saninnocent,notthetypeof

girlwhohasadifferentguyinherbedeveryweekend,likehersister—oratleastthat’s

whatthetabloidsreport.NotthatIhaveaproblemwithgirlslikethat.Eachtotheirown,

right?ButthetypeofgirlI’mreallyattractedtoissittingacrossfromme,hercheeksa

softshadeofpink,desirereflectinginhereyes.

“That’sverykindofyou,”shesays.

Igrinather.“IdowhatIcan.”

Istand,shrugintomyleathercoat,grabmyhelmetandholdoutmyhand.Sheslides

hersmallpalmintomineandIgiveagentletugandlifthertoherfeet.Herbodycollides

withmine,andIstifleahungrygroanofwant,fartoomanyyearsinthemaking.Shewets

herlipsagain,andIslidemyhandaroundherbackandguidehertothedoor.

“Youneverdidanswerthequestion,”Isay,asshegathersherlongchestnuthairinher

handsandsmoothsitout.Fuck,whatI’ddotoseethatunrulymessofcurlsspillingacross

mypillow.

“Whatquestion?”

IpullthedooropenasIsay,“Isthisafirstdateorsecond?”

Wantdancesinhermocha-coloredeyesandsheopenshermouth,abouttoanswer,

whenafanstartsscreaming“Saralynn!”

Shit.

Shecurlsintome,gripsmyshirtinsidemyopencoat,andpossessivenessflashes

throughme.

Withtheneedtoprotectherfiringmyblood,Iholdhertome,shieldingherfrom

unwantedattentiononthesidewalk.“Backthefuckoff,”Isayascamerasflash.Iholdher

closer.“Comeon.”Withhertuckedundermyarm,Idartdownthestreet,abandoningmy

motorcycleonthesidewalk.

SincemyhoteliswithinwalkingdistancetoPat’sPub,it’swhereIplantotakeherto

hideout—amongotherthings—ifshe’sgame.I’dgoneforacruiseonmybikeearlier,

checkingoutoldhaunts,andstoppedatPat’swhenhungerhit.Myparentsmovedtothe

countryafterIgraduatedcollege,andIhadn’tbeenhomeinyears.Therewasnothing

reallyhereforme.

Untilnow…

Whenwereachmyhotel,thedoormanopensthedoorforus,andweslipinside.

“Welcomeback,Nate,”Oliversays.

Inodtotheelderlygentleman.“There’sacrowdchasingmyfriendhere.Willyousee

toit…”

“Noworries,”hesaysandgesturesforsecurity.

IturntoRae,who’sbreathinghard,herwarmbreathfallingovermychest.Mycock

throbs,wantingthatsweetmouthwrappedaroundit.Butnowisnotthetime,notwhenI

seerealworryinhereyes.Ormaybethat’snotworry.Iputmyhandsonherslim

shoulders,andsheblinksupatme.

“You’resafehere,”Isay.“Theywon’tbeallowedonthepremises.”

Sheglancesaround,herexpressiveeyestakingeverythingin.“Areyoustayinghere?”

Inod.“Yeah,foralittlewhile.”Iboughtatownhouse,butmyfurniturehasn’tarrived

yet,whichmeansIneedtocampoutinthishotelforafewmoredays.Notahardship.The

placeisprettyupscale.

Hergazesettlesbackonmine,andIgesturetothehotelbar,notwantingtorushthings

orscareheroff.Fuck,Iwaitedsixlongyearstoseeheragain,andIwanttodothisthe

rightway.I’mabouttoaskifshewantstogetadrink,whensheputsherfingerstomy

lips.

“Second,”shewhispers.

No.Fucking.Way.

BeforeIletmycockgettooexcited,Ineedclarification.“Secondwhat?”

Sheslideshertongueoverherlipagain.Jesusfucksheneedstostopdoingthat,orI’m

goingtotakeherrighthereinthemainlobby.

“Seconddate,”shesays,hervoicesoquietIhavetostraintohearit.

Mymouthwaters,dyingtotakehertomyroom,tasteeveryinchofherflesh,andgive

heranightshe’llneverforget.ButasItakeintheheatinhereyes,Ifightaninternal

battle.ShouldItellherIknowwhosheis?She’sobviouslypretendingtobehersisterfor

areason,butshe’scertainlynotpretendingshedoesn’twantsomethingtohappenbetween

us.Fuck,I’mnotpretendingeither.Iputitrightoutthere.

AsIhesitate,debatingonwhethertotellherIknowwhosheisornot,hereyesgowide

andshefaltersbackward.“Unlessyoudon’twantto.”

Icaptureherelbowandhaulhertome,untilthatsoftbodyofhersispressedagainst

mine.AlittleflutterescapesherlipsasIintroducemyhardcocktoherstomach.“Hell

yeah,Iwantto.Butthere’ssomethingyouneedtoknowfirst.”

“What?”sheasks,soundingfarmorebreathesthanshedidasecondago.

“There’sonlyoneruleonaseconddate.”

“What’sthat?”

MylidsfallslowlyasIenvisionherbeneathme,andwhenIopenmyeyesagain,she’s

eagerlywaitingtohearwhatIhavetosay.“Allnight,inmybed.Youdon’tleaveuntil

morning.Agreed?”ChristtherearesomanythingsIwanttodotoher—havedreamt

aboutdoingforyears—thatI’llneedherbeneathmeuntilsunup,aweekfromtomorrow.

Sheanswerswith,“Canwegotoyourroomnow?”

AgrinsplitsmylipsandIcaptureherhand.“Idoloveagirlwhoknowswhatshe

wants,”Isay.HerbodyispracticallyvibratingasIleadhertotheelevator.Weclimbon

withtwomeninexpensivebusinesssuits,briefcasesintheirhands,lookingliketheyjust

camefromaFridaynightboardmeetingthatranlate.IshifttostandbehindRae.The

elevatorclimbsthefloorsquickly,butnotquickenoughforme,andIslidemyhand

aroundherbodyandtugheragainstme.Shegivesasmallaudiblegaspwhenmy

thickeningcockpressesagainstherback.

Inaboldmovethattakesmebysurprise,sheslidesherhandaroundherbody,presses

herpalmtomycock,andrunsitalongthelengthofme.Motherfucker.She’ssizingme

up.Ichuckle,andherhandfreezeswhenthementurnourway.Iignorethemandpress

mymouthtoRae’sear.

“Likewhatyoufeel?”

AlittlenoisecatchesinherthroatandIchuckleagain.Theelevatordoorspingsopen

onourfloor,andwestepoff.Ileadhertomyroom,swipemycard,andusherherinside

mysuite.

“Nice,”shesays,thenturnstome,hereyesmovingovermybody,assessingme.

“What’snice?”Iask.“Theroomorwhatyoufeltbetweenmylegs?”

Sheblushes.“Ididn’tmean…Iwasn’tthinking…”

Istepcloser.“Youcantouchmeanytime,anywhereyouwant.”

Herbrowsqueezestogetherasshegivesanotherslowsweepofme.Isshefinally

realizingsheknowsme?

“Thisisreally…nice.Ijustdidn’texpectthis.”

“What?”Itease.“Ican’thavenicethings?”

“Whatdoyou…”

HerwordsfalloffasIclosethedistance,traceherbottomlipwithmytongue.She

quivers,anditurgesmeon.Islidemyhandaroundherbackandpullheragainstme.Iget

whyshe’sconfusedbyme.Ireallydo.Theimagedoesn’tmakesensetoher.I’mstaying

inaposh,downtownhoteldesignedforwealthybusinesspeople,yetI’minkedand

drivingamotorcycle.Butunderneaththeimage,Iamasuccessfulbusinessman.Butsince

we’renotsharingidentitiesjustyet,it’ssomethingI’llsaveforlater.Whenmycockisn’t

throbbinginsidemyjeans.

“Iwantyounaked,”Isay,andtugherblousefromherskirt.

Sheplacesherhandonmychestandsplaysherfingers,asoftexplorationashercheeks

turnthatprettyshadeofpinkagain.Butthensomethingflickersinhereyes.Isit

uncertainty?Fuck,IwantherbutI’mnotabouttolayahandonherifshe’shavingsecond

thoughts.

“Idon’tnormally…”shebegins.

Myhandsstillonherslimwaist.“Don’tnormallywhat?”Igetthatshedoesn’t

normallyhavesexwithastranger,butifshesaysthat,she’llbegivingawaythatshe’snot

Saralynn.

Shegoesquietforamoment,thenherbravadoisbackinplace.“Idon’tnormallyleta

manundressme.”I’mabouttopullmyhandawaywhenhersoftpalmsclosesovermy

wrists.“ButIwantyouto.”closer

Fuckyeah.

Desiredeepenshermochaeyes,asmyfingersgotohersmallbuttons.Iworkthem

throughtheholes,butthelittlefuckersaregivingmybigfingershell.“Howmuchdoyou

likethisshirt?”Iask.

Oneshoulderrollsinashrug.“Ilikeitwellenough.”

“Canitbereplaced?”

Shegivesmeaconfusedlook.“Yes.”

Igripthematerialandtuguntilthebuttonspopandscattertothefloor.Shemakesa

littleyelpingsoundthatturnsintoaneedylittlemoanasIspreadhershirttoexposea

prettylacebrabeneath.Myeyeslatchontohercleavage,thewayherchestisrisingand

fallingrapidly.Damn,Ican’twaittogetmymouthonher.

Ipushhershirtfromhershouldersanditfallstothefloor.“I’llreplaceit,”Isay,and

unzipherskirt.Shewigglesherhipsanditslidesdownherlegs.Shestepsoutofit,and

standsbeforemeinnothingbutmatchingbraandunderwearstraightoutofmyfantasies.

Perfect.Sofuckingperfect.

Istepbackandtakealongmomenttolookherover.“Nate,”shefinallysays,andmy

cockpulsesasmygazetravelsbackupthelengthofhertomeethereyes.

“Yeah?”

“Iwantyounaked,too.”

Igrinather,andshedmyclothesinrecordtime.Ishrugoutofmycoat,peelmyshirt

frommybodyandgrabacondomfrommypocketbeforeIdropmyjeans.AsItossit

ontothenightstand,mycocktentsmyboxershortsandholdsherattention.Darkeyesgo

big,andIgriptheelasticandtugthemoff,freeingmycock.Istandthereforamoment,

lethergetaneyeful.

“Donestaring?”Ifinallyask.

Herthroatworksassheswallows.“I…Idon’tthinkthat’sgoingtofit.”

Idraghertome,andherstomachpressesagainstmyragingcock.Withmyhead

dipped,Ipressmymouthtohersandtastesweetwineonhertongue.“Yourbodywas

madeformine,”Isay,somehowknowingwe’regoingtobeperfecttogether.

Iplacemyhandsonherribcage,andsweepmythumbsoverhernipples,needingto

ditchthebrabecausemymouthiseagertospendsometimewithherbreasts.Islideone

handbehindherback,andIunhookherbrawithease.Afineshuddergoesthroughher.

“Thatwaseasy,”shesaysonabreathlesswhisper,asherbrafallsaway.Afirelights

hereyes,andIcan’thelpbutthinkshe’sexcitedbymyexperience.What,hasn’taman

evergivenherwhatsheneeds?Doessheevenknowwhatsheneeds?

Fuck,maybeshe’smoreinexperiencedthanIthought.

“You’vedonethisbefore,right?”

Herbodystiffens.“Yes,”shesaysquickly—tooquickly.“Tonsoftimes.Youseeallthe

guysI’mwithinthetabloids,right?”

“Yeah,right,”Isay,asIletmygazeroamoverherface.She’saninnocent,andthefact

thatshechosemetogetbadwith—puttingherselfinmyhands—isaresponsibilityItake

veryseriously.Icupherchin,dropasoftkissontohermouth,andbackherupuntilher

kneeshitthebed.Tonight,Iplantotakegoodfuckingcareofher,treatherthewayshe

deserves.

“Sit,”Isay.

“Bossymuch?”

Igrinather,asshedoesexactlywhatItellher.OnceagainIstandback,justtotakeher

in.“Openyourlegs.Iwanttoseeallofyou.”

Slowly,sheplacesherhandsonherkneesandspreadsthem.Thelightglistensonher

pinkheat.Sofuckingwetforme,it’sallIcandonottoloseit.“Fuck,youareperfect,”I

say.Shesitsupalittlestraighteratmycompliment,alittlebolder,hereyesconveying

whatsheneeds.

“Mine,allnight,”Igrowl.Sheblinksupatme,herbreathingalittlemoreragged.“Say

it,”Idemandinasoftvoice.

“Yours,allnight,”shewhispers,excitementbacklightinghereyes.

ItakemycockinmyhandandrubfromthebasetothetipasIzeroinonherhotpussy.

“We’regoingtofitjustright,”Isayashergazedartstomymovinghand,eyeswideasI

strokemyself.

“What?You’veneverseethisbefore?”IaskasImovemyhandfasteralongthelong

length.

“Yeah,yeah,Ihave.”

Ichuckleatherblatantlieanddroptomykneesinfrontofher.Removingherhands

fromherlegs,IplacethemathersidesasIshimmycloser,untilhersilkythighsare

huggingmyhips.Ipushherhairfromhershouldersandfindhermouthagain,dyingto

losemyselfinhersweetness.Asmallmoanescapesherthroat,andIbrushmylipsover

hercheek,aslowpassasImovetoherneck.Herhandswraparoundme,hernails

draggingacrossmyskinassheexploresmybody.

“Fuck,”Imurmuragainstthehollowofherthroat.“Ilovethewayyoutouchme.”I

trailmytongueoverherneck,thendipmyheadtopullonehardnippleintomymouth.

“Oh,myGod…”sheexpelsonaharshbreath.

Iflattenmytongueandgiveheralong,slowlick,andherbackarches.“Likethat

huh?”Isay.

“Yesss…”shehisses,andIchuckle.Discoveringwhatshelikes,allherlittlesecrets,is

goingtorockmyfuckingworld.Cometothinkofit,Ihadn’thadmyworldrockedina

long-asstime.Adifferentwomaneveryweekendstoppedcuttingitagesago,andthetruth

is,I’dbeensoburiedinworkandmoving,ithadn’tevenoccurredtomeuntilnowthatI’d

gonewithoutforalongtime.

Iclampdownonherturgidnipple,andherhipsmove.Igroan,adesperatesortofneed

burningthroughmyblood.Itreatherotherbreasttothesametonguebath,theninchback

toseeher.AlittlethrillgoesthroughmewhenIseelust-glazedeyes,lushlipsslightly

parted,andherchestrisingandfallinginanerraticpattern.Igiveheralittlenudgeand

shefallsbackontothebed.Herhairspillsacrossmybedding,andshelookssodamn

sexy,pre-cumdripsfrommycock.

HaveIeverwantedanyoneasmuchasIwanther?

“Ineedmymouthonyou.Everywhere,”Isay,andshestillsforamoment.“Yougood

withthat?”Iask.Shemakesathroatylittlenoiseandnods,herbreastsjiggingwiththe

movement.Ipressmylipstoherstomachandbreatheinhersweet-smellingskin.

Drawingitdeepintomylungs,Iholditthereforafewmoments.Icircleherbellybutton

withmylips,andherhipsrise,thetelltaleactionlettingmeknowexactlywhatsheneeds.

Igobackonmyheelsandspreadherlegsimpossiblywider,needingherwideopenfor

me.HerinflamedclitbeckonsmytongueandwhenIcatchherarousedscent,urgency

roarsthroughme.

Inestlebetweenherlegs,andmycockthrobs.Iputmymouthonherpussyandinthat

instant—IknowI’vefoundheaven.

Fuck.Me.Hard.SheisthesweetestthingI’veevertasted.

“Nate,”shecriesoutatthatfirstflickofmytongue.Ibrushherclit,circleit,thenapply

abitmorepressuretogaugewhatshelikes.

“Ohmigod,thatfeels…Ican’tbelieve…”Herwordstrailoff,likeshesuddenlycaught

herselfbeforeshesaidtoomuch,andIpause.Hasnomanevergivenheroralsexbefore?

Fuckman,thatcan’tberight.Eitherway,Iplantomakethissodamngoodforherthat

she’llbecomingbackformore.Yeah,afteronetasteofher,onenightisn’tgoingtocutit.

Ipushafingerintoher.Jesus,fucksheissotight.

Shegoesuponherelbowstowatch,andIstealaquickglanceather.“Youdothisall

thetimetoo?”Iask.

“Yes,”shesaysfast,toofast.

Motherfucker.Sheissofuckinginnocent.

Ipullmyfingerout,andpushitbackinagain.Hermusclesclencharoundme.“You’re

goingtocomeallovermyfinger,andinmymouth,”Isay,astatement,notaquestion.

Thatlookreturns,theonethathasworryalloverit.

JesusChrist,don’ttellmeshe’sneverhadanorgasmbefore.

“WhenIputmycockinhere,”Isay,addingasecondfingerforasnugfit,“I’mgoing

tofuckyousogood,you’restillgoingtofeelmenextweek.”

“Nate…yes…”shemurmurs,herbodypracticallyvibratingbeneathme.“Iwantthat.”

Itakeherclitintomymouth,andwhenherhipslift,Islidemyhandsunderherassand

cuphersweetapplecheeks,liftingherhigher,givingmymouthbetteraccess.Ieatather,

slidemytongueinsideher,thenbrushitoverherclit,untilshe’saquiveringmess.

“That’sit.Letyourselfgo,”Isayfromdeepbetweenherlegs.Iapplymorepressure,

andholdherwithonehandwhileIputmyfingersbackinsideher.

“Oh,yes,justlikethat,”shecriesout,stillupononeelbowasherotherhandreaches

forme.Sherakesherfingersthroughmyhair,andIfeelhertouchallthewaytomy

achingdick.Icrookmyfingersinsideherhotchannel,runthetipsoverthatsensitive

bundleofnervesasmymouthgrindsdownonherclit.

“Nate,”shecriesout,asherbodyshattersaroundmytongueandfingers.Igrin

inwardly,lovingthatIcouldmakeherflyhighlikethis.Hermuscleclench,spasm,and

moisturebreaksoutonherfleshasIcontinuethedualassault,prolongingherorgasm,her

pleasure.

Whenherbodycomesbackdown,hertremorsslowing,Iputmyhandsonherlegsand

staybetweenherthighs.Ilickhergently,softeningmytongueandusingaslowsweep

frombottomtotop.Hercandyflavordancesonmytongue,andifIdidn’thaveother

thingsIwantedtodotoher,I’dspendthenightexactlywhereIam.

ShehasasmallsmileonherfacewhenIfinallyclimbupherbody.Ilayoverher,

brushherhairfromherface.“You’rethesweetestthingI’veevertasted.”Hercheeksturn

thatprettyshadeofpinkagain.

“Youdon’thavetosaythat,”shesays,theRaeI’vecrushedonforyearspeekingout

behindtheSaralynnshieldshe’swearing.

“Iwouldn’tsayitifitwasn’ttrue.That’sthethingaboutme.You’llalwaysget

honestly.Always.”

SheswallowshardandforasecondIwonderifshe’sgoingtotellmethetruth,butthe

bloodleavesmyheadwhenshemovesherbody,massagingmycockwiththesexy

movements.Shepushesmehard,andIlandonmyback.Shegoesuponherknees.

Whatthehell?Issheleaving?HaveIfrightenedheroff?

Ireachforherbutsheslipsfrommyfingersandclimbsbetweenmylegs.

“Ah,Jesus,”Igrowlwhenshebendsforwardandtakesmycrownintohermouth,

lickingthepre-cumpoolingonmyslit.Shemoans,andthevibrationszapmyballs.She

cupsthem,givesagentlemassage,andIgripherhair,secondsfromshootingoffinher

mouth.Itfeelsfuckinggood,butIwantmydickinher.Correction,needmydickinher.

“Goddammit,”Igrowl,anditonlyurgesheron.Shetakesmetothebackofherthroat,

herwetmouthlikeatight,heatedglove.“You’rekillingme,”Isayasmyballsdrawupto

mybody.Okay,enoughofthis.Ipullherfromme,andhereyesarewildandhungryasI

flipherbackoverandpinherwithmybodyweight.“Iwanttocomeinsideyou,”Isay.

“Yes,”shemurmursandspreadsherlegswide.Myhearthitchesatthewayshe’s

puttingherbodyinmyhands.“Iwantthat,too.”

Igrabthecondomfromthenightstand,quicklysheathmyself,andgripmycock.Irub

itoverherclitandteaseherentrance,givingheronlyaninchandpullingoutagain.

“Please,Nate,”shesays,wigglingbeneathme.“You’rekillingme.”

“Youwantmycockinside?Fuckingyouhard?”

“Yes.Iwanttofeelyou,allofyou.”

“StillscaredIwon’tfit?”

“No,”shesays,tossingherheadfromsidetoside,awomaninneed.Anddammit,I’m

theguywho’sgoingtogivehereverythingsheneedsandthensome.

Ipushintoher,along,slowseductionthatseemstobedrivingherdeliriouswithneed.

Metoo,butIdon’twanttorushthings.Iwantthisperfectforher.Raelynndeserves

perfect.

“Please…”shebegs,herbreathhotonmycheek.

“Isthiswhatyouwant?”Ipowerforwardandgivehereveryinchofme.Sheclawsat

myback,herbodyopening,takingallofme.

“Thatisperfect,”shecriesout.

“Yeah,perfect,”Iagree,andpullout.WhenIslideinagain,seatmyselfhighinside

her,shemoansandwrapsherlegsaroundme.Shesqueezesherthighs,lockingmein

tight,andittakesasecondformetorememberhowtobreathe.

Shemovesherhips,andImoveinsideher,thrusting,fillinghertothehilt,onlytopull

outandfillheragain.Shemeetsandwelcomesmythrustslikewe’vebeendoingthisfora

lifetime.

“Youfeelsogood,”Isay,andburymymouthinthecrookofherneck.Ikissherand

poundintoher.Iwanttogoslow,Itrytogoslow,butJesusfuck,mycockissosnug,her

hotpussysowetandwelcoming,I’mlosingmyshit.

“Fuckme,Nate,”shewhispers,asheatburnsthroughmyblood.“Harder.”

Ipound,reachafrenziedpace,andgaspforairashersextightensaroundme.

“Yes,”shewhimpers,andassoonasIfeelhersoaking-wetheatonmycock,theworld

shutsdownaroundme,theonlythingexistingisthiswoman,thefeelofherbodybeneath

mine.

Ithrowmyheadbackandletgohighinsideher.Mycockpulses,throbsasIdeplete

myself.

“Ifeelyou,”shemurmurs.

“Feelyoutoo.”Mylipscloseoverhers,andourtonguesdance.Wekissforalong

time,untilmycockgrowsflaccidinsideher.Islideoutandshemakesanoohsound.It

bringsasmiletomyface.

“Nate,thatwas…Ijust,wow…I’venever…”Onceagainsheletsherwordsfalloff,

andIgetthesensethatshe’shidingsomuchfromme.

“Youneverorgasmedbefore,”Isay.

“No,Ihave…justnotwith…”

“Aguy,”Isay,finishinghersentenceforher.

“Yeah.”

Twothingshitmeatonce.PridethatI’mthefirstmantobringhertoorgasm,and

angerthatnomanhadtreatedherthewayshedeserves.Butthensuddenlythinkingofher

withanothermansitsinmygutlikealumpofoatmeal.Jesus,Idon’tlikeit.Idon’tlikeit

atall.

Idiscardthecondom,pullhertome,andrestherheadagainstmychest.“Sleep,”Isay.

“Iplantodothisadozenmoretimesuntilmorning.”

Willadozentimesevenbeenoughtosatemewhenitcomestoher?Igetthatshe’s

pretendingtobehersister,andthisissupposedtobeaone-nightthing,butafteratasteof

her,I’mnotreadyforthisthingtoend.

SowhatthefuckamIgoingtodoaboutthat?

ChapterThree

Raelynn

OMFG…

Ican’tbelieveIsleptwithatotalstranger.Thensnuckoutunderthecoverofdarkness

asheslept—wearingtheT-shirthe’dtuggedoffanddroppedtothefloor,nonetheless.

Takinghisshirtmighthavebeenwrong—anduh,really,hadnothingtodowithme

wantingasouvenir—butIcouldn’tverywellwearmyblouse,notafterhetoreallthe

buttons.AfineshivermovesthroughmeasIrememberhisheatedgazewhenheripped

intomyshirt.Jesus,thatwashot.

AsIsitinmybed,morninglightfloodingmyroomandremindingmeit’sMonday

morningandIneedtogettowork,mygazegoestotheblueshirtdrapedovermymakeup

tablechair.Itsitstherelikeaguiltysecret,oneIcan’tbringmyselftowash—can’tstop

touchingandsniffingeverytimeIpassby.ItstillholdsNate’sscent,evenafterthreedays.

Stopthinkingabouthim,already.

Imaketwofistsandpressthemtomyforehead,asifthatwillsomehowerasehimfrom

mymind.EvenifIcouldexpelhimfrommythoughts,everytimeImovemyachingbody

itremindsmeofallthegloriouswayshepleasuredmewithhishands,tongue…cock.

God,thatmantouchedmeinplacesIdidn’tevenknowexisted.Whenhesaidhewas

goingtofuckmesogood,I’dstillfeelhimnextweek,hewasn’tkidding.

My,howIloveamanwithconfidence.

Now,whenhegoesbacktowhereverhecamefrom,hecantellhisfriendshesleptwith

theinfamousSaralynn.

Aknotsettlesinmystomachatthatlastthought.Shit,itshouldn’tbugmesomuchthat

hethoughtIwasmysister.Afterall,Iwastheonewholedhimon,toldhimIwas

Saralynn,forGod’ssake.Butthereisasmall,sillypartofmethatwishesheknewitwas

me,RaelynnWalker,hewasreallywith.Thatitwasmybodythatfitsowellwithhis.

God,whatamIeventhinking?Itwasaone-nightthing,andI’mnevergoingtoset

eyesonhimagain,andIneedtostopactinglikeaschoolgirlwithacrush.EvenifIdid

haveacrushonhim—whichIdon’t—he’sjustpassingthroughtown.Besides,guyslike

himgoforgirlslikeSaralynn.Ijustblendintothewoodworkandalwaysgetoverlooked.

Themenwho’veshowninterestinthepastwereonlydoingittogetclosetomy

flamboyantsister.TherealreasonIgaveuplookingforlove.

Ikickoffthecovers,mymoodsouringasIjumpintheshower.Ineedtogetmoving,

andgetmymindoffNate—whateverhislastnameis—onceandforall.Afteragood

thoroughwashing,scrubbingawaythelasttracesofNatefrommyskin—ifonlyitwas

thateasytoscrubhimfrommybrain—Idress,grabamuffinandabighat,andmakemy

wayoutside.

TheofficewhereI’mworkingisagoodhalf-hourwalk,andtheweatherisnice,soI

decidetogoonfootandgetsomefreshair.Ijustpraythebighatobscuresmyidentityand

Idon’tgetaccostedagain.HopefullythecommotionwillalldiedownwhenSaralynn

leavesBaltimore,andthemediareportssightingsofherinsomeothertown.

Ikeepmyheadlowered,letmyhairfallforwardtomaskmyfaceasIwalkdownthe

street.Thirtyminuteslater,IpullopenthedoortothebigcorporationwhereI’mteaching

work/lifebalance.IbecameinterestedinmentalhealthduringmyfreshmanyearatYale,

andoneofthegirlsonmyfloorcommittedsuicide.Aftertakingapsycologycourse,I

decidedtomajorinit,andwentontobecomeacounselorsoIcouldhelpothers.Now,not

onlydoIrunmyownbusiness,I’minhighdemandincorporateAmerican,whereImeet

withindividualsandteachthemstrategiestobalancetheirlives.

IfonlyItookmyownadvice…

Ican’tevenrememberthelasttimeIhadadate,orworkedonimprovingmypersonal

life.Well,technicallyFridaywasadate,right?AndIhavetosay,ifIcouldhavemoreof

that,I’dgofrombeingaworkaholictoasexaholic.

Yeah,itwasthatgood.

IgreetCynthiaatthefrontdesk,thentaketheelevatortothetenthfloor.Iwalkdown

thehallandmakemywaytomyoffice.Thismorningisfullwithindividualmeetings,

thenI’llbegivingayogaclassatlunch.Istepintomyoffice,andinstantlyhavethe

strangestfeelingthatI’mbeingwatched.

GoodGod,don’ttellmesomeoneherethinksI’mSaralynn.ThestaffallknowwhoI

ambynow,right?I’vebeenworkingwiththemformonths.

Iturn,buttheonlypersonIseeisWendy,who’scomingmywayforhernineo’clock

appointment.

IshakemyheadtoclearitandgreetWendywhenshecomesin.Therestofthe

morningpassesquicklyandbythetimelunchrollsaround,I’mreadyforsomeyoga

stretches.

Yogagearinhand,Ihurrytothebathroomtochange,thenstepintooneofthe

boardroomsthathadbeenturnedintoayogastudioduringmytimehere.Staffbeginto

trickleinandIpluginmyiPodtoplaysoft,relaxingmusic.

WhenIstandupagainandturntofacetheclass,themanwhostarredinmyreal-life

fantasythreenightsagoisstandingbeforeme.

HolyGod!Airleavesmylungsinawhoosh,andmylegsnearlygooutfrom

underneathme.

No.No.No.Thiscan’tbehappening.Ibrieflypinchmyeyesclose,andwhenIopen

themagain,Nateisstillstandingthere,showcasingthatridiculouslysexydimpleashe

smilesatme.

Oh,God,itishappening.

“Hi,”hesays,astheneedyjuncturebetweenmylegsleapstoattention,eagerfordate

threeandallthatcomeswithit.

Wait!

Jesus,hedoesn’tknowitwasmehesleptwith,right?Thenagain,howwouldheknow

Saralynnhasatwin?HeprobablythinksI’mher.ButhehastobewonderingwhyI’dbe

teachingyogatothestaffatDataSolutions.Couldthisbeanymorescrewedup?

“Hi,”Isayback,andholdmyhandout,suddenlymortifiedwiththiswholesituation.I

neverthoughtI’dseteyesonhimagain,yethereheis,intheflesh.“I’mRaelynnWalker.

Idon’tbelievewe’vemet.”

Hisblueeyesgosteelyashelooksatme.“I’mNateDaniels,”hesays,andstandsthere

lookingatmelikehe’swaitingforalightbulbtogooff.

NateDaniels.

Irackmybrain.Whydoesthatnamesoundsofamiliar?

Oh,becauseIwenttohighschoolwithareallyniceboynamedNathanialDaniels,and

IhavethefeelingthatI’mstaringathimrightnow.“Didwe…”

“Yeah,wedid,”hesays,andmyheartcrashesagainstmychest.

Oh,God,whatexactlyishesayingwedid?Sleeptogether,orgotohighschool

together.

“FillmoreHigh.Wewereinafewclassestogether,Rae,remember?”

Istandtheredumfounded.Partofmeishappythathedoesn’tthinkI’mthegirlheslept

withtheothernight—becausehowembarrassing,right?—butthereisanotherpartofme

that’stotallyfreakingoutthathedoesn’t.

WhatkindofstupidmesshaveIgottenmyselfinto?Ihavenoidea,butonethingisfor

sure,nowaycanIsleepwithhimagain.Notafterhesleptwithmy…sister.

Killme.Fucking.Now.

“Yeah,Iremember.”Istareathim,inmuchthesamemanneraseveryotherwomanin

theroom.He’stallandbroadandinkedandhandsome.“Youjustchanged,alot.”

“Youhaven’t,”hesays,hissexyvoicedroppinganoctave,remindingmeofournight

together,andthewayhetalkedwhenhewasinsideme.

“AndyouwentbyNathaniel.”

“YouwentbyRae.”

“Iusemyfullnamenow.”Iglancearoundtheroom.“Whatareyoudoinghere?”God,

whatastupidquestion.HeobviouslyhasbusinesswithDataSolutions.

“Ijusttransferredback.IwasoutinCaliforniaforawhile.”Hewinksatme.“I’mstill

atechgeek.Ilovetocode,”hesaysandwiggleshisfingers.

Atechgeekwho’ssoverygoodwiththosefingers.Mybraintakesthatmomentto

reliveournightandIflush.I’venodoubtthatmycheeksarescarlet.Ashestandsclose,

closeenoughthatIcansmellhisenticingmalescent,Irackmybrain,searchingfor

somethingintelligenttosay.

“Well,welcomeback,”Isay,surprisedIcanevenfindmyvoice.“Areyoujoiningus?”

Sexydimplematerializeswhenhesays,“Wouldn’tmissitfortheworld.”

Hestepstothebackoftheclass,whereafewoftheothermenarestanding,andlifts

hisarmsabovehisheadtostretch.

Itrynottostare.Ireallydo,buthowthehellcanInot?HisT-shirtdoeslittletohidea

hardabdomen,andhiskhakishortshughimsonicely.

I’mnevergoingtomakeit.

Iworktopullmyselftogether,thenturnmyattentiontotheotherstobegin.Igo

throughthemovesforthenexthalfhour,everynowandthenstealingaglanceatNate,

whoisprettydamnlimber.

ButIalreadyknewthat.

Whentheclassfinallyends,IunplugmyiPodandI’mabouttohightailitoutofthere,

whenIturnandbumpintoanimmovablebrickwall.

Nate.

“Haveyouhadlunch?”heasks.

“No,I’mabouttograbitnow.”

“Same.”Imakeamovetogo,butheputshishandonmyarm,inmuchthesameway

hedidatPat’swhenheaskedmetohavedinnerwithhim.“Wanttojoinme?Idon’tknow

manypeoplehere.”

“Ah…no.Thanks,butIusuallyeatatmydesk.”

“Toobad.I’mheadingtoPat’sPub.Theyserveupthebestdesserts.”

ChapterFour

Nate

Okay,nowthisisgettinginteresting.HereIthoughtshe’dcomeclean,tellmewhatshe

wasuptotheothernight,butno,nowshe’sbeingRae,pretendingitwasn’theratthe

hotelanditneverhappened.It’sallratherconfusing,consideringI’manhonestguy,and

havebeenopenwithherfromthestart.Yeah,it’strue,Ididn’ttellherIknewwhoshe

was,onlybecauseitwasclearshewasuptosomething,andIwantedtoletherplaythe

nightoutthewaysheneededto.

DoesshereallythinkIdon’tknow?

I’mnotsure,butonethingisforcertain,Iplantoshowsweet,innocentRaethatit’s

herIwantinmybed,nothersister.

Istepoutsideforabreathoffreshair,andmakemywaytoPat’sforasandwichand

coffee.Sadly,therewillbenodessertafterward.Iplacemyorderandpushbackinmy

seat,mythoughtstotallypreoccupiedwithRae.Ashortwhilelater,Iglancearound.

That’swhenIspotJanicefromHumanResources.IgesturetothewaitressthatI’m

switchingseatsandwalkovertoher.

“Hey,Janice,”Isay,“Wantsomecompany?”

“Sure,sit.”

Shepushesthechairoutwithherfoot,andIdropdownintoitjustasthewaitress

deliversmyfood.Janiceisasweetgirl.She’sfairlynewtotheorganizationandmyguess

isthatshe’sarecentgraduate.Theengagementringonherfingerglistensinthelight

shininginthroughthewindow.

“When’sthebigday?”Iask,andtakeabiteofmyturkeyonRye.

Asmilelightsupherface.“We’rehavingafallweddingdownsouth.”

“Adestinationwedding.”Inod,andenvisionherbarefootonthebeachgettingmarried.

Itsuitsher.“That’snice.”

“Youthink?”

“Sure.Whodoesn’twanttogetmarriedonabeach,right?”

“Doyou?”sheasksovertherimofhercoffeecupbeforetakingasip.

Jesus,Ihadn’tthoughtaboutit.Infact,I’dnevergivenmarriagemuchconsiderationat

all.I’dbeenwithlotsofwomen,sure.Imean,incollegeIhadtomakeupformydateless

yearsinhighschool.ButI’veneverlikedagirlenoughtoconsidermarriage.Whatkindof

weddingwouldRaelike,beachsideorformal?

Wait,whydidmythoughtsevengointhatdirection?

“I…uh…”Isay,andshelaughs.

“Commitmentphobic?”sheasks.

Idon’treallythinkIam,butsinceI’vejustenteredthesecondhalfofmytwentiesand

I’mstillsingle,maybeshe’sontosomething.MaybeIdohavecommitmentissues.

Ormaybeit’sbecausenoneofthosegirlswereRae.

Ohfuck.

“I’vejustbeenbusyworking.”

“Ah,well,youneedtostopandsmelltheroses,Nate.”Sheleansforward.“There’s

moretolifethanwork.Youknowwhattheysayaboutallworkandnoplay.”

LastFridayIplayed.

“Yeah,Iguess.”MymindrewindstowhenIhadRaeunderneathme.Icertainlywasn’t

thinkingaboutcodingthen.

“YoushouldmakeanappointmentwithRaelynnWalker.Wehiredherafewmonths

agooncontract.She’sworkingwiththeemployeesandteachingthemhowtohavebetter

work/lifebalance.

Assoonasthewordsleavehermouth,adirty,deliciousideaforms.

“Yeah,that’sprobablyagoodidea.HowdoImakeanappointment?”

“Hangon.”Sheopenshertabletandpullsupsomeschedule.“Hmm,”shesays.“She’s

fullybookedfortoday,butIcansqueezeyouinforherlastappointmentoftheday

tomorrow.”

“Bookit,”Isay,andgobacktofinishingmylunch.

Whenwe’redone,weheadbacktowork,andIwalkintomyoffice,putmyearbudsin,

andlistentomusicasIdiveintomylatestproject.BythetimeIliftmyheadagain,people

arefilingout,callingitaday.Astheleadprogrammer,Ihavestrangehours.SometimesI

canworkallnight,andothertimes,whenI’mnotelbowdeepinaproject,Icancomein

lateandleaveearly.It’saprettysweetgig.AsIwatcheveryoneleave,mythoughtsdrift

toRae.

Hassheleftthebuilding?

Ipushfrommydeskandmakemywaydownthehall.WhenIreachheroffice,Inote

thatherprivacyblindsarepulled,butherdooriscracked.Herdoorlikelywouldn’tbe

crackedifshehadanemployeeinside.Ilistenforafewmoments,thenpeerinsidetofind

herstandingbyherwindow,staringout.Withherbacktome,Ican’tseeherexpression,

butthere’ssomethinglonging,wistfulinherstance,thewayherheadiscocked.

Iknockandsheturnsaround,thesmileonherfacefalteringslightlywhensheseesit’s

me.

“Nate,”shesays,casualpoliteness.“Howareyou?”

“Stressed,”Isay.

Shefrownsandlooksatheropenlaptop.“Iseeyouhaveanappointmentwithme

tomorrow.”

“Lastoftheday,”Isay.“IhopeIdon’tendupkeepingyoutoolate.”

Shepushesawayfromthewindow,andIcan’thelpbutstare.Sheissogoddamn

beautiful,it’shardtobeinthesameroomwithoutstaring,touching.

“It’sfine.”Sheglancesatherwatch.“Areyoufinishedfortheday?”

“Headinghome.Well,technicallynothome.I’mstayingatthehotelaroundthecorner

untilmyfurniturearrives,”IsaygaugingherreactionasIgiveheranopportunitytocome

clean.

“Oh,Isee.”

“Iwasgoingtohoponmybikeandtakeadrivearoundtown,youknow,foroldtimes’

sake.”

“That’sagreatwaytode-stress.”

“Exactly.Wouldyouliketojoinme?”

Panicflashesinhereyes,butthenitmorphstopoliteinterest.“Iwouldloveto,butI’m

notdressedforit.”

“Icouldpickyouupatyourplaceafteryougetchanged,orbetteryet,whydon’tyou

cometomyhotel.Ihavesomespareclothesyoucanslipinto.”

“I…I…”

“Sayyes.I’dlovetogetcaughtup,Rae.It’sbeentoolongdon’tyouthink.”Yeah,from

Fridaynightuntiltoday,wasfartoolongforme.

“Yourclotheswillfloatonme.”

Iarchabrow.“Sothat’sayes?”

Shehesitatesagain,butasIwait,somethinginsidehersoftensandasmallsmiletugsat

hermouth.“I’dbehappytogetcaughtup,Nate.IfIcanborrowashirt,”shetouchesher

blouse.“Thesedelicatebuttonswilllikelypopopeninthewindonabike.”Hereyesgo

wide,likesherealizeswhatshejustsaid,butsherecoversquicklyandsays,“Icanwear

myyogapantsandsneakers.”

Pleasuremovesthroughme,andI’mfullyawarehowmuchI’mlookingforwardto

spendingtimewithher.“Comeon,”Isay,andgesturewithanod.

“I’llmeetyoudownstairs,Ijusthaveacoupleemailstosend.”

There’sastrangesensationinmychest,oneIcan’tquiteputanameto,asIleaveher

andmakemywaydownstairs.Ipacethelobbyandglanceatmywatch.Christ,isshe

havingsecondthoughts?Ifuckinghopenot.Iwanttospendtimewithher.Correction,

needtospendtimewithher.

Thatthoughthasmestilling.Isthisstilljustaboutsex?Ihavenoidea,butIdoneedto

seeifshe’sstalling.Imakeasteptowardtheelevator,butwhenthedoorspingopen,she

exits.Mybreathcatches.Sheissofuckingpretty.

“Allset?”Iask,soundinglikeI’djustswallowedaglassofrazors.Iclearmythroat,

andsheeyesme.

“Youokay?”

“Yeah,fine.”

Westepoutside,andIdon’tmissthewaysheleansforward,shadowingherfacewith

herhair.“Haveyoueverbeenonamotorcycle?”Iaskher.

“Nope.”

“Scared?”

“Ah,shouldIbe?”

Igrinather.“No,youshouldn’tbe.”Inudgeherwithmybodyandshesways.“Iwon’t

letanythinghappentoyou.”

Shegivesmeabigsmile,andmychesttightens.God,Iwanttokissheragain.We

hurrytothehotel,andItakeusuptomyfloor.Onceinsidemyroom,Iwalkovertomy

suitcase,whichIdidn’tbothertounpack,androotthroughit.

“Here,”Isayandhandherashirt.“I’malittlelow,oneseemstohavegonemissing.”

“Oh?”Avertinghereyes,sheducksintothebathroom.“Maybehousekeepingpickedit

upbymistake,”shesaysthroughthecloseddoor.Istandoutsideofit,andlistentothe

wispofherblouseassheremovesit.Myfingersitchwiththeneedtotouchheragain,

proveit’sherIreallywant.

TheknobturnsandIstepbackasshecomesoutwithmyoversizedshirt,lookingso

sweet,soadorable,sogirl-next-door,ittakeseveryounceofmystrengthnottotossher

ontomybedforourthirddate.Seriouslythough,whatisitaboutagirlinmyclothesthat

hitsmeinthechest,somewherearoundthevicinityofmyheart?Wait,correction.Whatis

itaboutRaeinmyclothesthathitsmeinthechest?Womenhavewornmyclothesbefore,

butneverdidithavethiskindofaffectonme.

“Nate,”shesaysquietlyasIcontinuetogawkather.

Iscrubmyface,needingtodosomethingwithmyhandsbeforeIputthemonher.

“Yeah.”

“Youready?”

Ifshe’saskingifI’mreadytotasteheragain,theanswerishellyes,butIthinkthat’s

justwishfulthinkingonmypart.Andthetruthis,asmuchasIwanttotouchheragain,I

dowanttospendsometimegettingreacquainted.Iwanttogettoknowthisgrown-up

versionofthegirlI’dcrushedonforoh…ever.

“Onemorething,”Isay.Igototheclosetandpulloutmyleathercoat.WhenIturn

back,she’sstaringatherblouse—theoneIremovedfromherbody—nowfoldedneatly

onthedresser.Iwaitamoment,toseeifshe’sgoingtosaysomething.Whenshedoesn’t,

Iholdoutthejacket.“Putthison.”

ShespinstofacemeandItakeinherflushasIdanglemyleathercoatinmy

outstretchedhand.

Shefrowns.“Whataboutyou?”

“I’llbefine.”

“I’mnotgoing—”

“Yes,youare.Nowputthison.”

“Bossymuch?”Sheturns,andIputthecoatoverhershoulders,thenstandbackwhen

shefacesme.“It’shuge,”shesays.

“That’sokay.Idon’tplanontakinganyspills,butifsomethinghappens,Iwantyou

protected.”

Sheanglesherheadandgivesmeasmile.“That’sveryconsiderateofyou.”Weboth

standthere,heatarcingbetweenus,takingupspaceasitsizzleanddemandsattention.

Raesnapsoutofitfirstandpointstothedoor.“Weshouldgothen.”

“Right.”Igrabmyhelmetandthespareonefromtheclosetandwetaketheelevatorto

theparkinggarage.Ileadhertomybike.“Comehere.”Shefacesme,andIputthehelmet

onherhead.MyfingersgrazehersoftskinasIlatchitandshevisiblyquivers.Ihaveto

say,Ifuckinglovehowshereactstomytouch.

Ihelpherontothebike,thenclimbon.“Holdontome,”Isay,andwithouthesitation,

hersmallhandswraparoundmychestandlinktogether.Ipatthem,thenstartmybikeand

pullintotraffic.Idrivethroughthestreetsandheadtothemarket.

WhenIstopmybikeinfrontofGary’sGrill,sheputshermouthclosetomyear.

“Whatarewedoinghere?”

Isetthekickstandandwebothclimboffthebike.“IhavebeencravingoneofGary’s

turkeyburgersforthelastsixyears.”

Shelaughs.“They’rethebest,right?”

“Right.I’mgoingtogetthemtogo.Whatdoyouwantonyours?”

“Everythingandextrahorseradish.”

“Agirlaftermyownheart,”Isay,andthatdamnblushreturns.

Iorderupourturkeyburgers,grabbingfourbecauseneitherofushadeatensince

lunch,andhandthebagtoRae.“Willyoubeabletocarrythisandholdmewithone

hand?Iforgotmybackpack.”

Sheliftsherarmtopushdownthebigsleeveofmyleathercoatandnods.“Whereare

wegoingtoeatthem?”sheasks.

Iwagmybrows.“It’sasurprise.”

Sheeyesmeaswebothclimbbackonthebike.Shereststhebagonherlegandslides

onehandaroundme.OnceagainIpullintotraffic,andcutdownthestreetsuntilwe’re

sittingoutsideourelementaryschool.She’slaughingwhenIstopthebike.

“Whyarewehere?”

“Whynot?Thisiswherewemet,remember?”

“Iremember.MichaelFrasertookmypencilandsnappedit.Iwascryingandyougave

meyours.”Shegivesaslowshakeofherhead,andhertoobighelmetwobbles.“What

everhappenedtothatguy?”

“Whoknows.Probablyouttorturingsomeotherbeautifulgirl.”Hergazedartstomine

atthecompliment,andItakethebagfromherandcaptureherhandtotakeheraround

back,whereIhopewe’llfindaplayground.

Weroundthecorner,andsureenoughthere’saswingset,teeter-totterandafewother

piecesofequipment.“Raceyoutotheswings.”

Itakeoff,andshe’slaughingwhensheyells,“We’renoteightanymore,Nate.”She

chasesafterme,butIreachtheswingsfirst.

“Iknowwe’renoteight,butyouteachwork/lifebalance,sowhatbetterwaytode-

stress,right?Youknowwhattheysayaboutallworkandnoplay.”

“ThisisnothowInormallyde-stress,”shesays,shrugsoutoftheoversizedcoatand

sitsontheswingnexttome.Shekicksoutherlegsandstartsswinging.Whenasmile

lightsupherface,mychestsqueezes.Sheshouldsmilelikethateveryday.

“Sohowdoyounormallyde-stress?”Iask.

Shedragsherfeetonthegroundtoslowherselfdown,andwhenshecomestoa

completestop,sheturnstome.“Truthfully,I’mabitofaworkaholic.”

Iopenthebag,takeouttwoturkeyburgersandhandherone.“Yeah,metoo.”

Shetakesabiteofherburgerandrollshereyes.“MyGod,thesearegood.”

Ibitemine,andgroan.“Sogood.”

Sheeyesme.“Sohowdidyougetintocoding?Imean,Iknowbackinhighschoolyou

werereallysmart—”

“Sowereyou.”

Sheshiesawayabitatthecomplimentthensays,“Thanks.”

“IwenttoStanford,gotrecruitedbyDataSolutions,andhavebeenworkinginthe

Californiabranchforthelastcoupleyears.Whenaleadpositionopeneduphere,Iwas

offeredthejob.”

“Areyouhappytobeback?”

“HappierthanIthoughtIwouldbe.”

“Whyisthat?”

“BecauseIgettospendtimewithyou.”Igiveaslowshakeofmyheadandchuckle.

“What?”sheasks.

Decidingtoputitrightoutthere,Isay,“DoyouhaveanyideahowmuchIcrushedon

youbackinhighschool?Actually,Ithinkitstartedrighthere,inelementary.”Iglance

aroundtheplaygroundandshefollowsmygaze.

“Really?”Shecrinkleshernose.“Ihadnoidea.”

Ishrug,takeanotherbigbite,andchew.Aminutelater,Isay,“Iknow.Youwerejust

so…outofmyleague,andIdidn’thavethenerve.”

“Outofyourleague,areyoukiddingme?”Shefrowns,thenadds,“Areyousureit

wasn’tSaralynnyouwerecrushingon?Alltheguyslikedher.”

“Whatmakesyousaythat?”

“Oh,thefactthattheguyswhodatedmewereonlydoingittogetclosetomysister.I

blendedintothewoodwork,Nate.IstoodinSaralynn’sshadows.”

“Isthatwhatyouthink?”

“It’swhatIknow.”

“Isthatwhyyou’restillsingle?Youdon’ttrustguysorthinktheyseeyouforyou?”

Herchinlifts.“Ilovemysister,Ireallydo.Butsometimes…”

“Itsuckshavingherforasister.”

Shegrins.“Yeah,Iguess.God,Ifeelsobadforsayingthat.”

“Don’t.Youcantellmeanything.”

Alongpauseandthen,“Whyareyoustillsingle?”

“JaniceinHumanResourcesthinksIhavecommitmentphobia.”

“Doyou?”

“Maybetherightgirljusthasn’tcomealong,Rae”Isay.

“NoonecallsmeRaeanymore.”

“Doyouwantmetostop?”

“Actually,no,”shesaysandgoesbacktoeatingherburger.“Itsoundsrightwhenyou

sayit.”

“Wantanotherone?”Ireachintothebag,andshenods.

“GoodthingIdon’thavetokissanyonetonightafterallthishorseradish.”

“That’stoobadthatyoudon’thaveanyonetokisstonight,”Isay,mygazedroppingto

hermouthassheswipeshertongueoverherbottomlip.

Sheswallowshard,herlidsfallslowly,andopenagainwhensheasks,“Doyou?”

“No,nottonight,”Isay,andhandheranotherburger.Weeatquietlyforabit,andwhen

I’malmostdone,Iask,“Sotellmewhatgotyouintowork/lifebalance?”

Aheavyseriousnesscomesoverherasshefinishesherlastbite.“WhenIwasin

college,agirlonmydormfloorcommittedsuicide.CounselorscameintotalktousandI

becameinterestedinmentalhealth.Iwanttohelppeople.”

“You’reasniceasIremember.”Icrinklemywrapperandputitbackinthebag.Istand

andgriptheropesonherswing.

“Whatareyoudoing?”sheasks,asshetossesherwrappersinthebagandholdson.

“Youjusttoldmeyouwereaworkaholic.Youhelpeveryoneelsefindfunandbalance,

andIthinkit’stimeyouhadsomefuntoo.”Ipullherbackandgiveherabigpush,she

yelps,andkicksherlegsout.Soonshe’sflyinghigh,herlaughcurlingaroundme.Ijump

onmyswingnexttoher.“Let’sseewhocangetthehighest.”

IkickmylegsoutandsoonI’mswinginghigherthanher.

“Youbetterstoporyou’regoingtogooverthebar,”shewarns.

“Can’thappen,”Isay.“SawitonMythBusters.Youcan’t,underyourownpower,doa

three-sixty.”

Sheslows,andisabitbreathless,whenIdragmyfeetalongthegroundtostopmyself.

“MythBusters?”

“Yeah,ashowthattriestobreakmyths.What,youneverheardofit?”Sheshakesher

head,andIconfess,“I’mstillthatgeek,Rae.”

“You’realotofthings,”shesays,andjumpsfromherswing.

“What’sthatsupposedtomean?”

Insteadofanswering,shesays,“Raceyoutothemonkeybars.”ShetakesoffandI

catchhereasily,scoopingherupinmyarms.Shesqueals,andIsetherbehindmesoIcan

reachthebarsfirst.

“MyGod,”shesayswhenshecatchesme.“Idon’trememberyoubeingso

competitive.”

“IgoafterwhatIwant.Nothingwrongwiththat,right?”

Shegoesquietforamomentandsays,“Nothingatall.”

Wespendthenextcoupleofhoursplayingonequipmentandjusttalking,getting

caughtupinoursixyearssincehighschool,andIhavetoadmit,Ilikeeverythingabout

thisgirl.Like,alot.

ButwhatcanIdoaboutit?She’sstillnotcomingcleanaboutlastFriday.Idon’twant

tocomerightoutandtellherIknow.Idon’twanttodoanythingtojeopardizethisthing

betweenus—whateveritmightbe.

Astimefliesby,andnotwantingthisnighttoend,Isay,“Theartfestivalisgoingon

downtown.Whattocheckitout?”

Shelooksdown,herhaircoveringherface.Ican’thelpbutgetthefeelingshe’s

worriedsomeonewillmistakeherforhersister,andshe’llhavetospillthetruth.“It’s

gettinglate,andIhaveanearlymorningtomorrow.Webothdo,andIneedtogoover

somenotes,soIshouldprobablyheadhome.”Shehesitatesforalongmoment,thensays,

“Maybewecangotomorrow.”

Igrin.“Workandplay.Ilikeit.”

“Hereyousaidyouwereaworkaholictoo,andyetyou’reanythingbutdull,”shesays.

“Yeah,Iknow,butbeingaroundyoumakesmewanttoplay,”Isay,puttingitrightout

there.

Herchestheavesattheimplication,andIcaptureherhand,grabmyjacket,andlead

herbacktomybike.Iputthecoatoverhershouldersandhelpherintoit,thenwepullon

ourhelmets,climbonandItakeherhome.Iparkoutsidehercondoandhelpheroff.

Sheturnstome,andhereyesarewarmwhenshesays,“Thanks,Nate.Ican’t

rememberthelasttimeIhadfun.”

Unabletohelpmyself,Idipmyheadandpressmylipstohers.Islidemytongueover

herbottomlipandasoft,breathlessmoanrisesinmythroat.

Atfirstshe’shesitant,butwhenIcoaxhermouthwithmytongue,herlipspart.Small

handsslidearoundmybackandtugatmyshirt.Mycockthickens,pressesagainsther,

lettingherknowinnouncertaintermswhatshedoestome.

Acardrivesbyandhonks,draggingusbothback,andsheabruptlybreaksthekiss.

“Youshouldn’thavedonethat,”shesays,despitethewayshemeltedintome.

Sorry.Notsorry.

“Why,becauseofthehorseradish?”Iask.

“No,it’sjust…Idon’tkissonmyfirstdate,”sherespondsquickly,hergazemoving

overmyface,andthistimeshe’sgaugingmyreaction,likeshe’stryingtofigureoutifI

know.

“Isthatwhatthisis,Rae?Afirstdate?”

“I…wewere…”

“Ineedtoknow,”Isay.

“Why?”

Igrin,andbrushherhairfromherface.“Becausetherearedifferentrulesfordifferent

dates,andwhenIseeyoutomorrow,Ineedtoknowwhichtoapply.”

ChapterFive

Raelynn

AloudnoiseoutsidemydoorreachesmyearsandIpracticallyjumpfrommychair.

EversinceNatekissedmelastnight,andwantedtoknowwhatnumberdatewe’dbeon

tonight,I’vebeenanervousfreakingmess.

Tellhimtwo,orbetteryetthree.

Christ,afterallthedirty,deliciousthingshedidtomeondatetwo,whatwouldathird

dateentail—nakedandhavingsexwhileskydiving.

Findout,Idareyou.

AsIcurseattheinnervoice,Imovepapersaroundonmydesk,pretendingtowork,but

notabletofocus.Ihadsomuchfun“playing”withNateyesterdayattheschool,notto

mentionwhatwedidinhishotelroom,thatI’dbeenunabletothinkaboutmuchelse.

Inafewminutes,he’llbewalkingintomyofficeformylastappointmentoftheday.

HonesttoGod,Ican’tbelievehowmuchhe’schangedphysically.Underneathitall

though,he’sstillthatsamesweetguyIgrewupwith.Yeah,sure,he’sstillagamergeek,

butdamnedifIdon’tlikethekindsofgamesheplaysoutsideofwork—sexualand

otherwise.Thefactthathetookmetoaplayground,askedaboutme,mywork,and

wantedtointroducealittlebalanceintomylife,touchedmeonanotherlevel.Noguyhad

everbeensoconsiderate,orjustwantedtogettoknowmebetter.

Talkaboutthecompletepackage.

OneIcouldeasilyfallfor.

ButhesleptwithmethinkingIwasSaralynn.Ordidhe?Jesus,I’msoconfused.

ShouldIjuststraight-upaskhimifheknew,ortellhimIwaspretendingtobeSaralynn?

Yeah,sure,goaheadanddothat,Rae.Waytolethimthinkyou’reanutjob.

MycellpingsandIseeit’smysister,wantingtohangout.We’vebeenplayingphone

tagforthelastfewdays,andhaven’thadachancetoconnect.EitherI’matworkwhen

shereachesout,orshe’soutpartyingwhenItextback.Nodoubtshe’sfoundahotnew

guyinBaltimoretoplaywithwhileshe’shome.Itextherback,lettingherknowIhaveto

worklate,butwanttodolunchwithhersoon.

ThehardknockonmydoorzingsthroughmeandwhenIglanceupandseeNateenter,

hisbigbodyeatingupthespace,breathleavesmylungs.Noguyhasarighttogoaround

lookinglikethatdeliciouslydirtyandsinful.Howcananywomaninthebuildingbe

expectedtogetanyworkdonewithsexinashirtstrollingthehalls?

“Nate,”Isay,keepingmyvoiceeven,professional,asIstandandgesturetothechair

acrossfromme.“Rightontime.”

“Iliketobepunctual.”

Heclosesthedoorbehindhim,andaquivermovesdownmyspineashesetsthelock.

Whythehelldidhedothat?

“Privacy,”hesays,likehecanreadmymind.“Nooneneedstoknowourbusiness.”He

moveswithaconfidencefewmenhaveashelowershimselfintotheplushchaironthe

othersideofmydesk.

“Isthisyourfirsttimevisitingwithacounselor?”Iask.

Hepushesbackintheseat,andkickshislegsoutinfrontofhimself,hislong,hard

bodyonfulldisplay.“Yup.”

Concentrate,Rae.“Okay,justsoyouknow,everythingyoutellmeisconfidentialand

private.Feelfreetoopenup.Saywhateveryoulike.Itwillneverleavethisroom.”

“Yeah?AnythingIlike?”

“Ofcourse.”Ipickupapen.“Yoursecretsaresafewithme.”

HeleansforwardandIcatchawhiffofhisscent.Ittricklesthroughmybloodand

awakenseveryerogenouszoneinmybody.

“Okay,then,”hesays.“Thetruthis,eversinceIseteyesonyou,allI’vebeenableto

thinkaboutisputtingmymouthonyourbody.”

Myfingersshake.Mypenfalls.Andmydamnpulsejumpsexcitedlyinmynecklikea

confession.Holycripes,waytogetrighttothepoint.Thenagain,healwayshasbeena

straightshooter.Whenitcomestohimtherearenosecrets—whichcouldonlymeanhe

thoughthesleptwithSaralynn,orhewouldhavesaidsomething,right?

AsIlookathim,hiswordsfromyesterdaycomebacktome.

IgoafterwhatIwant.

Buthesleptwithmysister.Well…hedidn’t.Thisismessedup.WaytogoRaelynn!

Iyellattheinnervoicetoshutthehellup,becausefromthewayhiseyesaredimming

withdesire,it’sclearit’smehewantsrightnow.Shy,studious,workaholicbookworm

RaelynnWalker,notSaralynn,musicstar.

Whycan’tIgoafterwhatIwant,too?HavealittlemorefunwithNatebeforethisjob

isover.

Oh,probablybecauseIreallylikethisguy—alwayshave.He’ssmart,funny,

spontaneous,andinthebedroom,wellnotonlydidhepayattentiontomyneeds,he

rockedmyfreakingworld.I’monlyonthisjobalittlewhilelonger.SoonI’llbemoving

toanewcorporation,newclients,andIlikelywon’teverseteyesonhimagain.

Butwithallthingsconsider,howcanIgiveintothissexualtensionbetweenus?

HowcanInot?

“Nate…Idon’tthink…”

“Jesus,Rae,whenIclosemyeyesatnight,allIcanenvisionisyoubeneathme,your

handsonmybody,mineonyours.Idon’tknowaboutyou,butIcan’tthinkofabetter

waytobalanceworkandlife.”

Igulp,butdon’tmissthewaymybodyisreacting,becauseyeah,I’vebeenthinking

thesamething.

“Soyou’resayingsexistheanswerforyou?”

“Notjustforme,butforyou,too.Lastnightyouadmittedthatyouwereaworkaholic.

Whatbetterwaytode-stressandforgetlifeforawhile?”

“Youthinkifwehavesex,itwillhelpusboth?”

Hegivesacausalshrug.“Twobirds,onestone.”

Itrynottoletmygazedroptohisverybigstone.

Iclearmythroat.“AndI’llbeabletoforgetaboutworkforawhile?”

Hisdimplesmaterializeashegrinswithme.“Icanguaranteeworkwillbethelast

thingonyourmindonceIgetyounaked.”

OMFG.Itotallywantthat.IworktokeepameasureofcalmwhenIsay,“You’repretty

sureofyourself,aren’tyou?”

“Yeah,”hesays,andreachesacrossthedesktotakemyhandinhis.Herubstherough

padofhisthumbovermywristandIdamnnearmelttothefloor.“Iam.Sowhatdoyou

say?”

Don’tsayyes.Don’tsayyes.

Goingintoprofessionalmodeagain,Isay,“You’restraight-uptellingmewhatyou

need,andIappreciateyourcandor…”

“And…”

“AndIguess,consideringit’smyjobtohelpemployees,ifIfailedtoprovideyouwith

whatyouneededtobalanceyourlife,I’dbedoingyouagreatdisservice,agreat

disservicetothepeopleinmyprofessionwhoworktirelesslytohelpothers.”

Nowthat’ssometop-notchjustifyingrightthere.

BeforeIcanevenanswerthatquestion,Natecirclesthedesklikeapredatorstalkingits

prey,andIsweartoGod,I’mabouttoorgasmfromthemeresightofhim.Hestepsbehind

me,gathersmyhairinhishandsandgivesaneasytug.Mychinlifts,andhebrusheshis

handalongmyexposedneck.Hisfingersfeellikefireonmyskin,abradingmyfleshwith

eachlightstroke.

Asoftmoancatchesinmythroat.Jesus,Ilovethewayhetouchesme.Hebends,puts

hismouthtomyear.

“Onyourfeet,”hewhispers,hiswarmbreathcaressingtheoutershellofmyear.I

stand,andheshovesmychairoutoftheway.Igivealittlegulpwhenintenseeyesfullof

need—forme—runthelengthofmybody.

“Youaresofuckingbeautiful,”hesays.Theheatinhiseyeslickoverme,andsettles

deepbetweenmylegs.Iopenmymouth,buthavenoideawhatitisIwanttosay.“These

lips,”hesays,cuttingoffthewordstryingtoforminmybrainashebrusheshisthumb

overmybottomlip.“Sopretty.I’vebeenthinkingaboutthemwrappedaroundmycock.”

Iwhimper,andhedipshishead,leansforwardandbrusheshistongueovermyliplike

he’stastingme,savoringtheflavor.Isagagainsthim,wantinghimtostripmenakedand

ownmecompletely.

“Youwantthat,Rae?Youwantmycockinhere?”

Oh,God.

“Yes,”Isay,andtheninamovesofastittakesmebysurprise,hegripsmyshoulders,

turnsme,andbendsmeovermydesk.Ohhellyes!Hishandscloseovermyass,andhe

givesagentlesqueeze.Mybreathisraggednow,shallowlittlepantsasheleansoverme,

runninghishandsalongmycurves,hisbreathhotonthebackofmyneck.

“Ibetyou’renotthinkingaboutworknow,areyou,Rae?”

“What?”Iask,mythoughtsracingamillionmilesanhourasIwaittofeelhishandson

mybody—again.

Hechuckles,putshiskneebetweenmylegsandspreadsthem.Iquiverashedipsa

handundermyskirt,andrunsitupmyinnerthigh.“Areyouthinkingabouthowgoodit

willfeeltohavemycockinhere?”

“Yes,”Isayquickly,outingmyselffortheneedygirlthatIam.

Imoveabit,tryingtoforcehishandhigher,tothegreedyspotthat’scravinghistouch.

Hegripsthelaceonmypanties,pullsthefabricaside,andrunshisfingeralongmyslit.

ForthofJulyfireworksgooffinmyhead,andI’msoclosetoexplodingrightalongwith

them—fromasimpletouch.Jesus,thisguyistoomuch…tooeverything.

“Nate,”Icryout,desperateforhimtofuckme.

“Yeah,Rae?”heasksashepushesmyskirtupovermyhips.Hedropstohisknees

behindme,gripsmypantiesandslowlydragsthemtomyankles.Heliftsmylegs,oneat

atime,andIglanceovermyshoulderintimetoseehimstuffmypantiesintohispocket.I

thinkbacktotheT-shirtIworewhenIsnuckfromhishotelroom.IguessNatelikesto

keepsouvenirs,too.

HestandsupandIpressmycheektothedeskwhenhegivesalow,slowwhistle.

You’dthinkI’dfeelembarrassed,bentovermydeskwithmybodyexposedlikethis,but

everythinginthewayhetouchesmeandtalkstome,bolstersmyconfidenceandmakes

mefeellikethesexiestwomanalive.

Igivealittlewiggle;shakemybareassathim,anythingtogethimtotouchmeagain.

Hisexhaleisharsh,tortured.“Youprobablyshouldn’tdothat,”hesays,hisvoice

deeperthanitwasmomentsbefore.

“Youmeanthis?”Iask,andsquirmsomemore,wantingtomakehimascrazedashe

makesme.

“Yeah,that,”hegrowls,andafineshivermovesthroughmeasthehissofhiszipper

reachesmyears.Yes!

“Whynot?”Iask,playinginnocent,andlistentothesoundhishandmakesashe

strokeshimself.Damnthat’shot.

“Whatdateareweon?”heasks,insteadofansweringme.Hisquestiontakesmeby

surprise,andIhesitateforamoment.“Rae,whatdateareweon?”hepresses.

Saythree.

“Iguesstechnicallytwo,”Ianswer,eventhoughit’sreallyourthird,andIkindofwant

allthatcomeswiththat.

“Andthat’swhyyoucan’tshakeyourbacksideatme.Yousee,you’vegotthesweetest

ass,andIreallywanttofuckit,claimyoueverywhere,butit’stoosoonforthat,”he

explains,notatraceofhumorinhistone.“Therearerules,youknow.”

“Rulesaremeanttobebroken,”Isay.Whatthehell!WhythehellamIpokingthe

bear?DoIwanthimtodothattome,claimmeeverywhere?

Oh,Jesus,Ido.Ireallydo.

“Ican’tagreemore,butIplantotakemysweettimewithyou,takeyouwhereyou

needtogomyway.”

Iquakeathiswords,andheputsahandbetweenmylegstostrokemysex.Iwhimper

whenhethrustsafingerinsidemeandmypussyclenchesaroundhim,mybodysodamn

closetoorgasmingfromhisdirtymouthalone.

Hestrokesmedeep,andreachesaroundmewithhisotherhandtoplaywithmyclit,

likeheknowseverythingaboutme,everythingIneed.Imovemyhips,rockagainsthim,

andheinsertsanotherfingerforasnugfit.God,yes.Heatzingsthroughme,racesthrough

mybloodandpoolsbetweenmylegs.Nateshiftshisstance,andhishardcockpresses

againstmyside.Mymouthwaters,eagerforataste,andeventhoughhesaidhe’dbeen

thinkingaboutmylipswrappedaroundhiscock,heseemstohaveotherideasatthe

moment.

Hisseductionisslow,hisstrokesunhurried,butwhenIwiggle,heincreasesthe

pressureonmyclitandcrookshisfingerinsideme,hittingthehotbundleofnervesthat

hasmybrainshuttingdown.“That’sit,”isallImanagetogetout;well,thatandaloud

moanthathalftheofficeprobablyheard.

“Areyouthinkingaboutcomingallovermyfingers,Rae?”heasks,andImumble

someincoherentreply.Hechucklesinresponse,butfromthewayhe’smovinghiships,

rubbinghiscockagainstme,it’seasytotellhe’sasunhingedasIam.

Istretchmyarmsout,griptheedgesofmydesk,andstruggletohangon,butmy

effortsprovefutile.HisdeftfingerstakemetotheprecipicewhereI’maboutsoar,buthe

won’ttakemeover.AsmuchasIwantthat,Idon’twanttocomejustyet.Idon’twant

thistobeover.Ever.

Hepressesahotkisstomyneck,andwhispers,“Youaresotightaroundmyfingers,

mycockisachingtogetinsideyou.”

“Pleasedothat.”

“Iwill.Whenyou’reready.”

“Iamready,”Iblurtout,hatingandlovinghimforthewayhe’steasingaclimaxoutof

me.

“Shush,now.Youdon’twantthewholeofficetoknowwhatI’mdoingtoyouinhere,

doyou?”Hepullshisfingersoutanddipsthembackintome,toyingwithmyclitinthe

mostridiculousways.

“Idon’tcare.”Ipushagainsthishand,thenjerkforwardtorubmyclit.

“Ido,Rae.Idon’twantanyonebutmelookingatortouchingyourbeautifulbody.”

Ihearpossessioninhisvoice,feelitinhistouch,andIwanttoexamineitfurtherbut

can’trightnow,notwhenhe’smoaningintomyear,andpumpingfaster,deeper,knowing

justwhatIneedtopeak.

“IwantyoutocomeallovermyfingersRae,soIcanlickthemcleanandtasteyoufor

therestofthenight.”

Holyshit.

Hisdirtywordspushmetotheedge,butit’sthesweetnessinhistouch,thewayhe’s

takingsuchgreatcareofmybodythatsendsmeover.Mymusclesclench,suckhisfingers

indeeper,andhisgrowlcurlsaroundmeandturnsmeonevenmore.It’sclearhelikes

touchingmeasmuchasIlikeit.Thatthoughtbringsonasecondorgasmthatblowsmy

freakingmind.

“Oh,yeah,that’sit,keepridingoutthewaves,baby.”

IworktobreatheasIclawatmydesk,incredulousthatIhadoneorgasm,letalone

two.I’veneverbeensoresponsivewithaguybefore.Thenagain,noneofthoseguyswere

Nate.

Hepullshisfingersout,andmoansashetakesthemtohismouth.Ianglemyheadto

seehimsavormyjuicesonhisfinger,andmypussyclenchesagain.Frig,Iamsoswollen,

Ihavenoideahowhe’llfitintomenow.

“Youwantmycockinherenow?”Hepushesafingerbetweenmylegs,andslidesit

insidemeagain.

“Yes,”Isay.“Please,Nate.Ineedtofeelyouinsideme.”

“You’regoingtocomeformeagain.”

It’sastatement,notaquestion,andwhileIdolovehisconfidence,Iknowmybody,so

Ianswerwith,“Ican’t.”God,I’mcompletelystrungoutfromtwoorgasms,nowaycanI

haveathird.

“Yesyoucan.”

Foilcrinklesasheripsintoacondomandsheatheshimself.Asecondlater,he’s

betweenmyspreadlegs.Hishandsgripmyhipsforleverage,ashepositionshiscrownat

myopening.

“You’regoingtocomeallovermycock,”hesaysandpowersintome.“You’llsee.”

“Oh,myGod,”Icryoutashefillsme,stretchesmewide.Mybodyopensforhim,like

weweremeanttobetogether.Aperfectfit.

Onehandslidesupmyspine,pushesmyhairawayandholdsthebackofmyneck.His

thumbbrushesmyskin,andatingleracesdownmybodytosettledeepintomysex.

Ananimalisticgruntingnoisecatchesinhisthroat.“Youfeelsofuckinggood.”

“Sogood,”Imurmurathishardthrust.“Yes,fuckme.Hard.”

Soonenough,Ilosemyselfinthesteady,punishingthruststhattakemehigherand

higher.Myvisionsfades,myworldnothingbutthismanandthewayhe’sowningme

completely.Iclosemyeyes,envisionhiscocksinkinginandoutofme,andwishIcould

watch.Whatisthismanturningmeinto?Idon’tknow,butIloveit.

Hecursesfrombehind,hisbreathhotonmybody.Arestlessachemovesthroughme,

awakeningmysexagain.Icreeptowardtheedgeasheadjustshisstanceforadeeper

penetration,reachinguntappedplacesinsideme.Pleasureandpainmingle,gripmehard,

andIshakeallover.Oh,God,whatishappeningtomybody?

“Ican’t,”Icryout,thepleasuretoomuch,toointense.

“Iwantyourcumallovermycock,”hegruntsout.

“Nate…I…”Icryout,needinghimtostopasmuchasIneedhimtocontinue.

“Please,”Ibeg,eventhoughIhavenoideawhatitisI’mbeggingfor.Nateseemstoknow

though.Oh,yeah,heseemstoknowmybodybetterthanIdo.

Heramshome,deep,slickstrokesashereachesaroundmybodytostrokemyclit.I

breatheinthescentofhimasmybodysuckshiscockindeep,toodeep.It’salltoomuch.

Iclawatthedesk,andtrytostiflemycry.Heholdsmetightandfucksme,harder,faster

thanI’veeverbeenfuckedbefore.Timeslowsasaheavyneedbuilds.Igrowdizzy,a

moanIhavenocontrolovereruptingfrommythroat.Ahotjoltcentersonmysex,asI

rocketintoanotherhardorgasm.

“Fuck,yeah,”hemurmurs,hisbighardcockgrowingfatterinsidemeasheslowsfora

moment,tonurturemyrelease.Mythighstremble,andhepicksupthepaceagain,

chasinghisownorgasm.Imovewithhim,hishandstighteningonmyhips,squeezing

hardenoughtoleaveabruise,butIwantthat,Iwantthememoryofuscomenextweek,

whenthiswilllikelyallbeover.

Hestillshighinsideme,andhiscockswells,expandsashereleases.Mybodywraps

tighteraroundhislength,holdinghimtight.“Rae,”hewhispers.

“Nate,”Isayinresponse.

Hefallsoverme,andtakesdeep,serratedbreaths,andmyheartpoundsagainstthe

tablebeneathme—partlybecauseofthesex,andpartlybecauseI’mfeelingmoreforthis

manthanIshould.Thisisjustsupposedtobeanaffair.Uncomplicatedsex.Whythen

doesitfeellikesomuchmore?

Hetouchesmyhair,gentlybrushingitfrommyshoulders,thenhepressesthesoftest

kisstomyshoulder,akisssodelicateandloving,alumpformsinmythroat.Itryto

swallowpastit,trytogetmyselfundercontrol.

“Doingokay,Rae?”heasks.Whileit’ssweetthathe’scheckinginwithme,andIlike

italot,Iprayhecan’tseethestormgoingoninsideofme.

“Great,”IsayandtrytoinjectalightnessintomyvoicethatIdon’tfeel.“You?”

“Betterthangreat.”Hepepperssoftkissesovermyneck,andIvisiblyquiverbeneath

him.HegrowlsasIsqueezearoundhiscock.

Westaytogetherforalongtime,hisweightpressingdownonme.I’mnotallthat

comfortable,butIhavenodesiretomove.Hedoesn’tseemtoeither.Anoisesomewhere

downthehallreachesourears,andhecurses.

“Dammit,Iguesswe’dbettermove.”

“Yeah,”Isay,andheinchesoutofme.Iwhimperattheloss,andremainonthedesk,

mycheekagainstthecoldwood.Natediscardsthecondom,grabsafewtissuesfrommy

deskandwipesmeclean.Myheartmissesabeatashecaresforme.

Unmovingandbonelessafterthatincredibleroundofsex,Natecarefullyliftsmeand

turnsmetofacehim.Hissmileisslow,softashecupsmyfaceandbrusheshisfinger

overmycheek.Hisgazemovesovermyface,likehe’sassessingme.

“Whatareyouthinkingabout,beautiful?”heasks,andmystomachflutters.Whata

sillylittlegirlIamtogetallflusteredandemotionaljustbecausehethinksI’mbeautiful.

“Notwork,”Isay,andhelaughs.Ilaughwithhim,andhetakesthehemofmyskirtin

hisbighandsandgentlypullsitdownuntilit’scoveringmybody.Onceherightsmy

clothes,hepullshispantsbackupandzipshimselfin.

“Aboutthatartshowtonight,youstillwanttogo?”heasks,noawkwardnessbetween

usafterwhatwe’djustdone.

Ileanagainstthedesk.“IfIcangetmylegstowork,I’dloveto,”Isay.

Hepullsmetohim,wrappinghisarmsaroundmybodytosupportme.Hekissesthe

topofmyhead,likewehaveofficesexandgooutafterwardonaregularbasis.Ipressmy

facetohischest,listentohisstrongheartbeat,andthinkabouthowmuchIliketheideaof

usdoingthisonaregularbasis.

“Thenit’sadate,”hewhispers,hisvoiceholdingallkindsofsinfulpromises.

ChapterSix

Nate

Iprettymuchjusthadthebestweekofmylife.Intheofficeeveryday,Ilostmyselfin

mywork,andoutsidetheofficenearlyeverynight,IlostmyselfinRae.Duringthattime,

Ialsolosttrackofhowmanydatesweactuallyhad.Butnoneofthatisimportant

anymore,notwhensweetRaehasopenlygivenherselftome,overandoveragain,letting

mefuckher,ownher.Duringthecourseoftheweek,sheletdownherguardandnosigns

ofhersisterappearedinherpersonality.IreallylikethatRae.Alot.

Seriouslythough,couldthingsgetanybetterthanthis?

Istandbackandglancearoundattheemptyboxeslitteringmynewhouse.Themoving

companycameSaturdaymorning,andputalltheheavyfurnitureinplace,thenIspent

mostoftheweekendorganizingandunpackingtheboxes.Ilookatmyfurniture,barely

used,andallthepotsandpansIboughtbutnevercookedin.Takeoutwaseasier,butthe

bachelorlifestyleisgettingold,fast.

AmIreadytosettledown?

MymindinstantlygoestoRaeagain,andrealityhitslikeasuckerpunch.Iguessthings

couldbebetter.Raecouldbeherewithme,andwecouldbeunpackingherthingstoo,

thencookingtogether,eatingtogether,goingtobedandwakinguptogether.Allthe

domesticshitthatIalwaysavoided.

Holyshit!

AmIreallythinkingaboutthat?Thinkingaboutmakingthisthingbetweenusalittle

morepermanent?Whatifit’snotwhatshewants?Whatifitis?Eitherway,Iknowwe

needtotalk,andsheneedstoknowI’mwellawarethatitwasher,Itookinmyhotel

roomthatnight.Butthenagain,she’syettocomecleanwithme,andtherehastobeapart

ofherthatthinksI’madouchebagforsleepingwithhersister,andthenher.

Butmaybeshedoesn’tcare,maybethisreallyisjustaboutsextoher.Fuck,Ihatehow

muchthatbothersme.

Anoiseatmydoordrawsmyattention,andmyheartracesalittlefasterwhenIsee

who’sstandingonmystoop.

Rae.

Man,I’mseriouslyintoher,insomanyways.

Thenconvinceherthere’smore.

Istepoveraflattenedboxandhurrytothescreendoor.“Hey,”Isay,andthehinges

squeakasIpushthedooropenforher.“Comein.”

Abigsmilelightsupherface,andIbendandcaptureherlipswithmine,desperatefor

atasteofhersweetness.WillIevergetenoughofher?Notfuckinglikely.WhenIinch

back,she’sbreathingharderandblinkingupatme.

“I’mheretohelpyouunpack,”shesays,hervoiceabitunsteady.“Iwouldhavecome

earlier,butIhadafamilything.”

“Iappreciateit,butyoudon’thavetohelpme.”

“Didn’thaveto,wantedto.”Shecrinkleshernoseandlooksaround.“Movingby

yourselfisalotofwork,anditbuildsupanappetite.”Sheholdsupabigcasseroledish

wrappedinateatowel.“Ibroughtuslasagna.”

Istandstillforoneshockedmoment.Fuck,noonehasevercookedformebefore.

ShefaltersbackwardasIgoquiet.“Youdon’twantit?”sheasks,andthe

disappointmentonherfaceislikeapunchtothegut.Jesus,Ihatethatlook.Don’tever

wanttoseeitonherfaceagain.

Itakethedish,warmbeneaththeteatowel,andgetmyshittogether.“OfcourseIwant

it.It’sonlymyfavorite.”

“Iknow,”shesays.

“Yeah,howdoyouknowthat?”

“Becauseyouateiteverydayinhighschool.Yousinglehandedlykeptthecafeteriain

business.”

Ilaughandanglemyheadandlookather.“Yourememberthat?”

“Hardnotto.”Sheputsherfingeronmychest.“Youalwayshadalittlebitofsauceon

yourshirt.Rightabouthere.”

I’malittleshockedthatsheremembers.Maybeshe’sasintomeasIamher.Isureas

hellhopeso.Eitherway,wehavetotalk.

Ibalancethelasagnainonehandandputtheotheronherface,andsheleansintome.

“Thankyou,Rae.Thiswasreallyniceofyou.”

“I’mnice,whatcanIsay.”

Iplacethelasagnaonthecounterandanglemyheadtostudyherwhensheglances

downandfrowns.“Yousaythatlikeit’sabadthing.”

“No,it’sjust…”Sheshiftsonherfeet.

“Justwhat?”Ipress,andtakeastrandofherhairbetweenmyfingersandrubit.

“Iwasalwaystheniceone,andSaralynnwasalwaystheflamboyant,talentedone.”

Shegivesadefeatedshrug.“Andyouknowwhattheysayaboutniceguys.”

“Thattheyfinishlast?”

Shelooksdown.“Yeah.”

Itouchherchin,andnudgeituntilhereyesmeetmine.Wantingtolightenhermood,I

say,“HaveIeverletyoufinishlast?”

Herbigmochaeyesgowide,andasmallgrinteasesthecornerofhermouth.“Well,

no…”

Iscoopherup,andsheyelps.“Whatareyoudoing?”

“We’lleatlater,thenI’llgiveyouatour.Rightnow,theonlythingIwanttoshowyou

ismybed,andhowmuchIlikenice.”

Icarryherintomyroom,andgentlytossherontomyunmadebed.Herhairsplaysand

mycockthickens.

“Nicebed.”Shefansherarmsout,runningherfingersovermysheetasshecatalogues

hersurroundings.“Niceroom.”

“LikeIsaid,Ilikenice.”ItugoffmyT-shirt,andherbreathingchanges.“You’reright,

unpackingdoesbuildupanappetite.”

Longlashesflashoverbigdoeeyes,allinnocentlike.Teasingme,shemakesamoveto

getup,andsays,“Oh,I’dbetterheatupthelasagnathen.”

“That’snotwhatIwantinmymouthrightnow,”Igrowl.“Nowgetnaked.”

Shetriestohideasmile,andIgetthesensethatshelikesthewaysheaffectsme.

Good.IplantoshowherjusthowaffectedbyherIam.Her,asinRaelynnWalker.

Iripintomyjeansandkickthemfrommybodyassheshedsherclothesforme,

completelyuninhibited,andIreallylovethewayshe’ssocomfortablearoundme.And

Jesus,shelookssorightonmybed.

“You’rethemostbeautifulwomanI’veeverseteyeson,”Isay,andthistimeshe

doesn’tblush.No,thistimesheopensherlegs,andcrooksherfingers,invitingmeinto

herbody.

Igentlyclimbbetweenherlegsandfalloverher.Icaptureherlipsinaslow,

simmeringkisswithamissioninmind.Overthepastweek,sheletmefuckher,letme

ownherbody,butnow,inthismoment,Ineedhertoletmeloveher.

“I’msogladyoucameover,”Iwhisperintohermouth.“Imightnoteverletyou

leave.”WhatI’ddototiehertothebedpostandkeepherhereforever.

“No?WhataboutworkMondaymorning?”sheasksplayfully,asshemovesherhips,

massagingmycockwithourbodies.

“Work/lifebalance,right?Callinandsayyou’reworkingwithaclientonthebalance

part.”

“YouthinkIcouldgetawaywiththat?”Sherunsherhandsovermybody,asoft

exploration,asamoanrisesinherthroat.

Withakiss,andatouchthatislesshurried,Ifindthesensitivehollowofherthroat.

NowthatI’vegottentoknowherbody,allhererogenouszones,Iplantomakesweet,

sweetlovetoher—andIdon’tevencareifIhavetoturninmymancardforthinkinglike

that.Lovechangesaguy,Iguess.

Ifuckingloveher.

“Won’tknowunlesswetry,”Isay,andshequiversasmybreathwashesoverherskin.

“Mmm,”shemoansasIslowlyseduceherwithmymouth,tongueandfingers.

Idiplower,takeherbeautifulnippleintomymouth.Ilick,givealong,slowkissuntil

she’squiveringbeneathmyministrations.

“Nate,please,”shecriesout,andliftsherhips,butnowayamIhurryingwithher.We

havethewholedayaheadofus,andIplantouseeveryminuteofittopleasureherbody,

tomakesuresheknowswhat’sbetweenusisreal.

Imakemywaylowerandflattenmyselfonthemattress,untilherbeautifulpussyis

inchesfrommymouth.Irunmyfingeralongherslit,partherdampfolds,andgroanwhen

Iseeherenflamedclit,soeagerformytouchandmouth.Itdoesthecraziestthingstome.

“Sopretty,”Isay,andrubherslowly.

“Ohmigod,Nate.Ineedyouinsideme.”

“Here?”IaskasIgiveherthetipofmyfinger.“Likethis?”

Herhipsmove,andIpressahandtoherstomachtostillher.“Nomoving.Letmetake

careofyou.”Agroanfillstheair,andIstealaglanceather,tofindherheadmovingfrom

sidetoside,thepinkinhercheeksmatchingthepinkofhersex.

Beautiful,absolutelybeautiful.

Igivehermoreofmyfinger,andhermusclesclench,holdingmeinside.Ican’tbelieve

howclosesheis.Thenagain,she’salwaysresponsivewithme,andIfuckingloveit.

She’dtoldmeshe’dnevercomewithanothermanbefore,andthefactthatIcantakeher

theresoquicklyrocksmyworld.Sheneverholdsbackwithme.ButthenIthinkabouther

withanotherman,andwell,Ihavetodispeltheimage,becauseI’dkillanybastardwho

camewithinfivefeetofher.

She’smine.

Provingthatpoint,Ilickherswollenclit,takeitintomymouth,andsavorherflavor.I

moan,wantingnothingmorethantostaybetweenherlegsforever.

“Nate,”shecriesout,andIincreasethepressure.Imovemyfingerinandoutofher,

buildingherslowly,gently,andherbreathingchanges.Shereachesforme,runsher

fingersthroughmyair,andIrevelineverygasp,everymoancatchinginherthroat.

Herhipsinchup,andthistimeIletherrockintome.Wemovetogetherslowly,andI

lickherwitheachupwardthrustofherbody.“That’sit,”Imurmuragainstherpussyas

herclimaxapproaches.

“Nate,”shewhispers.Herbodyconvulses.“I’m…coming.”

“Yeah,baby,Iknow.”

Istaybetweenherlegsassheridesouttheorgasm;Itouchhergently,strokehersoftly,

andbringherdownslowly.Whenhertremorssubside,Iclimbupherbodyandclaimher

mouth.

“Whatareyouthinkingaboutnow?”Itease.

“You.Tyingmetothisbedanddoingthatfortherestofthenight,”shesays,andkisses

meback.

“Howaboutwedothisinstead.”Iflipoverandpullherontopofme.Igrabacondom

frommynightstand,rolliton,andgripherhipsandliftheruntilshe’sstraddlingme.

“Yes,this,”shemurmurs,asshetossesherheadback.

“You’regoingtocomeformeagain,andIwanttoseeyouwhenyoudo.”

Hergazefindsmine,andtheneedinhereyes—needforme—fillsmewithlove.

Shemovesherbody,triestopushdownonmycock,butIholdherhips,controllingthe

movement.

“Nate,”shegrowls,butitturnsintoamoanasIdragherdown,givingheraninch.

“Thatfeelssogood.”

“Youfeelincredible,”Isay.

“More.”Igiveheranotherinch,andshecriesout.“Yes.”Herhandsgotoherbreasts,

andwhenshecupsthemandrunsherthumbsoverhernipples,mycockpulses.

“Youaresobeautiful,”Iwhisper,andpullherdown,seatingmyentirelengthhigh

insidehertightheat.

“Nate,”shewhispers,androcksagainstme.Ipullhermouthtomine,andkissherlong

anddeepaswemovetogether,eachgivingandtakingandcreatingarhythmthattakesus

higherandhigher.Mycockthrobsinsideofherandshemoansintomymouth.

Innotimeatallshe’sclenchingaroundme,herhotreleasesingeingmyballs.Inudge

hershouldersuntilshe’sinanuprightposition,desperatetoseeherfaceasherpleasure

peaks.

ThemeresightofherdesirebringsonmyclimaxandIreleaseinsideher.Myfingers

biteintoherhips,andsheshakesherhair,exposingherperfectbreastsashersweetpussy

massageseverydropfromme.Whenourtremorssubside,Ipullherdownandsherestson

topofme.IsmoothherhairbackandkissthetopofherheadasIeasemycockoutofher.

Iquicklydispensewiththecondom,andwesnuggleforalongtime,bothlostinourown

thoughtsuntilmyrumblingstomachcutsthequiet.Shechucklesandliftsherselfup.

“Ithinkwe’dbetterfeedyou.”

Itapherass,andsheclimbsoffme.Weslidefromthebed,andIgiveheranotherlight

slaponherperfectass.“Jumpintheshower,I’llstickthelasagnaintheovenandmeet

you.”ShenodsandIguideherdownthehall,leadinghertothebathroom,sinceshe

doesn’tknowherwayaroundmyplaceyet.SheentersandIhurrytothekitchen.Iturnon

theoven,putthelasagnainside—thengoperfectlystillwhenagod-awfulnoisereaches

myears.

Issomeonekillingacat?

Ifollowthesound,andwhenIenterthebathroomandhearRaesingingintheshower,

myheartnearlyexplodeswiththeloveIhaveforher.Iinchthesteamydoorsopenand

hereyesgobigwhensheseesme.

“Why‘Hello’,Adele’sgotnothingonyou.Youhitthosehighnoteswaybetterthan

her.”Idoafistpump.“Gogirlpower.”

“Nate,”sheyellsandsplasheswateratme.“Benice.IsingwhenI’mhappy.”

“Iamnice.”Istepinwithher,gatherherinmyarms,andpoisemylipsoverhers.

“AndI’mgoingtoshowyouwhatIliketodowhenI’mhappy,”Isay,andcaptureher

mouthwithmine.

ChapterSeven

Raelynn

Ican’tbelievehowmuchfunI’vebeenhavingwithNate.Irealizethatinlessthana

monthmycontractwillendatDataSolutions,andI’llnolongerseehimonadailybasis,

andthatrealitytwistsmeupinside.

ThetruthisI’mcrazyabouthim.Ontheoutside,he’sallhotmale,butontheinside

he’sstillthatsamesweetboywhogavemehispencilafterMichaelFraserbrokemine.He

waskindandshybackintheday,butwhenhetalkedtome,hegavemehisfull,

undividedattention,justlikehedoesnow.Unlikeotherguyswhocameandwentoverthe

years,hewasn’tlookingovermyshouldertogetaglimpseofmybeautiful,talentedsister.

Imightnothaveseenwhatagreatguyhewasthen,butIsureashelldonow.

SowhatamIgoingtodoaboutit?

Ipaceinsidemyoffice,myheelstappingthefloorasIgofrommywindowtomydesk.

There’sapartofmethatwantstobelieveNateknewitwasmethatfirstnightweraninto

eachotheratPat’sPub,andiswaitingformetoopenuptohim.HowdoIdothatwithout

comingoffascrazy?Butthereisanotherpartofme—theinsecurepartbornfromyearsof

livinginmysister’sshadow—thatisafraidtobelieveit’smehereallylikes,afraidtowant

more.

Ihavetotalktohim,findoutthetruth,andseeifwehavesomethingmorehere.I

glanceatmywatch.EventhoughI’dliketogoseehimnow,IpromisedSaralynnI’dmeet

herforlunchatPat’s.She’sonlyhomeforanotherweek,andIfeelbadthatIhaven’t

spentmoretimewithher.

Igrabmypurseandhat,andmakemywayoutintothebrightsunshine.Keepingmy

hatpulledlow,Ihurrydownthesidewalk,butwhenIenterthepub,mysisterisnowhere

tobefound.Typical.I’malwaysmindfulofthetime,andshe’sforeverlate.Imakea

quicktriptothelittlegirls’roomtofreshenupmylipstickandfixmyhathair.

ThreegirlsIrecognizefromtheoffice,buthaveneverformallymet,allenterbehind

measIpulloutmycombandtrynottoeavesdrop.Butit’shardnottobecausethey’re

gigglinglikeschoolgirlsandtalkingabout…Nate.

Iswallow,andavoideyecontactastheycomparenotesonhishotness.

Oneofthegirlsfixesherhair,andwithlongmanicuredfingers,grabsherlipstickfrom

heroversizedpurse.“Yeah,butIknowagirlfromDataSolutions’branchinCalifornia,

andshesaidhe’satotalplayer.Slepthiswayaroundtheoffice.Orsoshesays.”

“ThenIcan’twaituntilhereachesmyfloor,”theblonderesponds,andtheyalllaugh.

“He’sgotareputationamilehigh,”theprettybrunetteadds.

LipstickGirlwagsherbrows.“That’snottheonlythinghehasthat’samilehigh.Orso

Iheard.”

“Ohmigod,Cheri,youaresobad.”

“Nofuninbeinggood,”Cherisays,andpressesherlipstogetherassherecapsher

lipstick.Shedropsitinherpurse,andtheothergirlsfollowheroutthedoor.

Itakeaminutetocatchmybreath.Nateisaplayer?Sleepshiswayaroundtheoffice?

Ishesleepingwithotherwomenbesidesme?Igivethatamomentofconsiderationand

shakemyhead.Hecan’tbe.We’vebeentogethernearlyeverynightsincehefirsttookmy

yogaclass.

Butwhataboutthenight’sweweren’ttogether?Washewithsomeoneelse?Maybehe

reallyhadthoughtIwasSaralynn,andhewashavingfunwiththetwoWalkertwins.Was

SaralynnoutwithhimthenightsIwasn’t?IfiguredshehadamaninBaltimore,whenwe

couldneverseemtoconnect.

BilepunchesintomythroatandmylegsgoalittleweakasImullthatoverforanother

second.

No,Nateisn’tlikethat.He’skind,caringandattentive.Hemighthavebeenaplayer

once—mostguysare—buthe’snotlikethatanymore.Deepinmyheart,Iknowwhatwe

haveistherealdeal.Ifeelitineveryfiberofmybeing.

Withthatlastthoughtinmind,Istepfromthebathroom.

ButwhenIlookformysister,andfindherarmswrappedaroundNate,herlipsonhis,

myvisiongoesalittlefuzzyaroundtheedges.

Whatthehell?

Ibackup,andgripthedoorframetokeepmyselfupright.AmIseeingthings?

Iblink,butwhenIopenmyeyesagain,herlipsarenolongeronhisbutthey’restill

embraced.Mystomachcrampsandtearsprickmyeyes.Here,I’djustconvincedmyself

hewasn’taguytosleeparound,yethe’sgothisarmsaroundmysister.CouldIhavebeen

sowrongabouthim?Couldhehavethoughthe’dsleptwithSaralynnallthistimeand

thenjumpedintobedwithme,too?Ishestillsleepingwithher?

DoIhaveanyrighttobethisupset?

AtfirstI’dpretendedtobemysister,thensettledonhavinganaffairwithhimas

myself.It’snotlikeweweredating.Thenagain,ifweweren’tdating,whywashekeeping

track?Washesimplyplayingagame,orwasheactuallypursuingarelationship?

AsIthinkaboutthat,trytosortthingsthrough,mysister’svoicereachesmyears.She

sayssomethingtoNateandhelaughsinresponse.Mystomachsinks,andforaminuteI

worrysomethingwillbesaidandthetruthaboutthatfirstnightwillcomeout.Natewill

surelythinkI’manutjobforpretendingtobeSaralynn,andI’mnotsosurehe’dbe

wrong.

Oh,God,whatamess.

Asfight-or-flightinstinctskickin,myoldfriendSeanCollins,whosefamilyownthis

bar,walksby.

“Sean,”Isayquickly.

Heturnstomeandasmilelightshisface.“Rae,howareyou?Ihaven’tseenyouin

forever.”

WeexchangeahugandIputmyarmthroughhis.“I’minahurry,willyouwalkme

out?”

“Sure,”hesays,andItrytofocusashespeakstome,butI’msocaughtupinmysister,

andNate,thatit’shardtoconcentrate.Ipullmyhatdownloweronmyheadasheopens

thedoorforme.“Let’scatchupsoon,”hesaysasIhurrydownthestreet,notbackto

workbuthome,whereIcansortthroughmyfeelings.FacingNateattheofficeafter

seeinghimwithSaralynnisthelastthingIwant.

BythetimeIreachhome,myphoneispinging,andIpullitfrommypockettoseea

dozenmessagesfromSaralynn,askingmewhat’sgoingon.

Wasn’tfeelingwell,Itextback.Takingasickday.Sorry.

Seansaidyouwereinahurrytogetoutofthepub.Ididn’trealizeyouwerehere.

Yeah,sorry,goingtoliedownnow.

I’llcomeover.

No,really,I’mokay.

Ireallywanttotalktoyou.Ihaveanewmaninmylife.It’sserious.

Oh,God.

Congrats,can’twaittohearmorewhenI’mbetter.

Not.

Ipowerdownmyphoneandtossitontomycounter,thengrababottleofwine.It’s

fiveo’clocksomewhere,right?Withshakyhands,Ipourahugeglassofchardonnayand

makemywaytomybedroom.IfI’mgoingtotakeamentalhealthday,Idon’tplantodo

itinmyworkclothes.Astearspoolinmyeyes,Ipeeloffmyskirtandblouseandslide

intoaT-shirtandboy-shortpajamabottoms.

Wineinhand,Iwalktothelivingroom,plunkdownonthesofaandgrabtheremote.

HeartachesetsmychestonfireasIflicktheTVontoseetwomenbeatingthecrapoutof

eachotheronJerrySpringer.

Ifinishthewine,grabanotherglass,andflickthroughthechannels,wonderinghowI’ll

everfaceNateagainafterfindinghimkissingmysister.

ThankGodSeancamealong.

Wait!Seaninstantlyknewitwasme.Howdidheknowthedifferencebetween

Saralynnandme?Thenagain,thosewhoknewuswellcouldalwaysseethesmall

differences.

DidNateknowmethatwell?

Mymindgoesbacktothenightinhishotelroom,andIthinkaboutthethingswesaid,

aswellasthethingswedidn’t.LikewhoIreallywas—andthat’swhenitoccurstome.

“Oh.My.God,”Isayoutloud,thenglanceovermyshoulder,eventhoughI’malone

andnoonecanhearmetalkingtomyself.Damn,maybeIreallyamanutjob.Butwho

canblamemefortalkingtomyself?NotafterIjustrealizedthatnotoncehadNatecalled

meSaralynnthatfirstnight.

Hehadtohaveknown.Hehadto.

ButwhywereheandSaralynnkissing?

Oh,God,Iamsodamnconfused.

Aloudknockonmydoorhasmejumpingtomyfeet,andIspillmywine.“Dammit.”I

settheglassdownandshakemyhand.Whothehellwouldbeatmydoorinthemiddleof

aworkday?

Iswingopenthedoortotellwhoeverisontheothersidetogoaway,becauseIneedto

findNate,andweneedtotalk.

ButwhenIcomefacetofacewiththemanI’minlovewith,myheartnearlystops.

“Nate,”Isay,suddenlybreathless.

“Rae,”hereturns.“I’vebeenmeaningtogiveyouthis.”Hehandsoutmyblouse,the

buttonsnowintact.“ItoldyouI’dreplaceit.”

Itaketheblouse,mypulsejumpinginmythroat.“Didyouknowallalong?”Iask,

wonderingwherewegofromhere.

Leaningin,hedropsasoftkissontomymouth,andImeltintohim.“Thatfirstdayin

Pat’sPub,whenyoukissedmeandIsaidI’dwaitedmywholelifeforthis,Iwasn’t

kidding.Ihadwaitedmywholelifeforyou.I’minlovewithyou,Rae.”

“You…are?”Ichokeoutaroundathroatgonetight.

Helovesme!

“OfcourseIam.HowcouldInotbe?You’reeverythingaguycouldwant.”

“Youreallyknewitwasme?”Iask,needingtohearitagain.“NeveroncethoughtI

wasSaralynn?”

“FromthesecondyouenteredPat’s,Iknewitwasyou.Itoldyou,Ilikenice.”

Herunshisfingersalongmyarmandgoosebumpsform.“Ithoughtnicewasboring.”

Adeeplaughrumblesinhisthroat.“Boring.You’reanythingbut.”

Somethingnigglesinthebackofmymind,somethingthatdoesn’tmakesense.“But

youwerehuggingSaralynn.”

“Yeah,Iknow.”

Iswallow.Atleasthe’snottryingtodenyit.Thenagain,hesaidhe’dalwaysbehonest

withme.Ifthat’sthecase,whydidn’thetellmeheknewitwasmeallalong?

“Yoursisterwasbeingchaseddownthestreet,ranintothepub,andstraightuptome.

Isn’tthatatotalSaralynnthingtodo?”

Heatmovesintomyface.“Yeah,whenithappenedtome,Ikeptthinkingwhatwould

Saralynndo.”

Hecupsmychin.“That’swhatyousaw,nothingmore.”

“Shetextedandsaidshehadanewmaninherlife.Ithought…”

“It’snotme.Itneverwas.”

“Whydidn’tyoutellmeyouknew?”

“Ifiguredyou’dtellmewhenyouwereready,andIwentalongwithitthatfirstnight

becauseitseemedlikeitwassomethingyouneededtodo.”

“JustonceIwantedtobemysister,youknow?”

“Iknow.”

“Youdon’tthinkI’mcrazy?”

“WhatIthinkis,I’mcrazyaboutyou,andIwantitall,Rae.Thehouse,thekids,the

dog.Ievenwantyoutosingintheshowereveryday.”Shegivesmeanevillookatthe

reminderofherhorriblevoice,andIlaugh.“Tellmeyouwantthat,too.”

“That’sanawfullottowant.”

“Ican’thelpit.”

“Well,you’regoingtohavetoletmethinkonallthat,”Isaysandhisfacedrops.

Worrylingersinhiseyes.

“Rae,”hesays,andreachesforme.

“Ican’t,Nate.”

“Rae,please…”

Ishakemyhead.“Thesingingisadealbreaker.”

“ButIloveyoursinging.”Hetouchesmyhair,runthestrandsbetweenthosedeft

fingersofhis,fingersIlovehavingonmybody.“Iloveeverysoundyoumake.”Irollmy

eyesathim.“It’strue.”Hepullsinadeepbreath.“Rae,”hebeginsagain.“Tellmeyou

wantthosethings.”

“Rememberwhenyousaidyouwantedtotiemetoyourbedandkeepmethere?”

Hisbodygoestightatthereminder.“HowcouldIeverforgetthat?”

Igivehimamischievousgrin.“HowaboutImakesomeothersoundsyoulove,andI’ll

giveyoumyanswerthen.”

Asmilelightsuphishandsomeface.“Yeah,rightnow?”

“Yes.”Iputmyhandonhischest,feelhisstrongheartbeat.“Thenit’sadate.”

Heangleshishead.“Adate,huh?”

“Yeah.”

Hegrinsatme.“Whichnumber?”

Irunmyhandoverhischestandsplaymyfingers.“BeforeIanswer,canyoutellme

whathappensonthetenthdate?”

Hegathersmeintohisarms,andkicksthedoorshutbehindhim.“Everythinghappens

onthetenthdate,Rae.Everything.”

Iputmylipstohisearandwhisper,“Thentenitis.”

ThankYou!

Thankyousomuchforreading,WILDNIGHT.IhopeyouenjoyedthestoryasmuchasI

lovedwritingit.PleasekeepreadingforanexcerptofConfessionsofaBadBoy

Professor.

Interestedinleavingareview?Pleasedo!Reviewshelpreadersconnectwith

booksthatworkforthem.Iappreciateallreviews,whetherpositiveornegative.

HappyReading,

Cathryn

ChapterOne

Justin

Anotherweekend.Anotherparty.

Ineedtogivethisshitup.

Iswirltheamberliquidinmyglassandglancearoundthebartotakeinthegroupof

loudgirlspartyingaroundme.ItrytofindtheoneI’djustdancedforinaprivateparty

roomoffthemainbar.I’mnotreallysurewhyI’mlookingforher.She’sjustanothergirl

inaseaofwomenIdanceforonceinawhile.

Mygazelandsonher,sittingattheotherendofthebar,uncomfortable,nervousandso

goddamnbeautifulmydickswells.

Okay,maybeIdoknowwhyI’mlookingforher.I’vebeendoingthisgigforalong

fuckingtime,andnoneofthegirlsIdancedforwereeverlikeher.TheguysandIstarted

dancingatpartiestoforcashwhenwewereincollege,andwell,maybemyreasonshad

moretodowithrebellionthanmoney.Thebusinessflourishedandspreadtootherstates,

andeventhoughnoneofusneedthemoney,wenowdancewhenwehavetofillin,orfor

kicks.ButI’mtiredofflyingaround,puttingonamaskandshakingmycockinsome

drunkgirl’sface.Butthisgirl,well,she’sbeennursingadrinkforthelasthour,and

doesn’tseematalllikethekindwhowouldenjoyahalfnakedguyshakinghisjunkather.

Icatchhergaze,andholditforaminute.Shequicklyturnsawayandmycockswellsat

hershyness.Shit.She’swaytooyoungandinnocentforme.Ihavenoideawhatherstory

isorwhyherfriendswouldhiremetodanceforhertwenty-firstbirthday,andIshould

leaveitatthat.IfIknewwhatwouldgoodforme,Iwould.

But,fuckit.Irarelygowithwhat’sgoodforme,whichiswhyI’msittingona

goddamnbarstoolinVirginiasippingonascotchwhenIshouldbebackatPennState,

gradingpapers.I’mboredwiththatjob,too.Butdearolddadisthedean,andwhileIhad

differentcareeraspirations,bothheandmompushedmeintoeducation—hencemy

rebelliousstage.

Iswallowtherestoftheliquid,letitburnitswaydownmythroat.Idon’tnormally

stayforadrinkafteragig,buttonight,Idon’tknow,there’ssomethingaboutthebirthday

girlthat’sthrowingmeoff.Ipickupthebackpackatmyfeet,theonestuffedwithmy

danceclothesandmask,anecessityformenow.I’mafuckingpsychprofessor,for

Christ’ssakes.Everhearofacodeofconduct?Yeah,well,I’mviolatingeveryruleI

promisedtouphold.

Ireallyneedtogivethisshitup.

Itossthebagoveroneshoulderandstand.Theheatintheroom,aswellasthemixed

scentofalcoholandperfume,washesoverme.I’manxioustogetthehelloutofhere.

Looksliketherecipientofmydanceis,too.

Ipushthroughthelivelycrowd,andslideinbesideheratthebar.Herbodygoesstiff,

andshit,I’mprettysureI’ddoanythingtohelpherrelax.

“Hey,”Isay.

Shenibblesherbottomlip.Sexyashell.

Fuckme.

Ishift,andleanonthebarsoshecan’tseemyswellingcock.

“Hi,”shesays.

“Notreallyyourscene,isit?”

Shecrinkleshernose.“AmIthatobvious?”

“Yeah,alittlebit.”Itakeaglancearound.“Wanttogetoutofhere?Walkthebeach?”

Herbackstiffens,andherchestjutsout,herlovelynipplespressingagainstthesilkof

herblouse.“Idon’tevenknowyou.”

It’strue.Shedoesn’t.IwasincostumewhenIdancedforher,sonowaycansheknow

I’mtheguyherfriendshiredtoshakeitinherface.Itakeinherwideblueeyes.So

fuckinginnocentshe’skillingme.

Desperatetoputheratease,Ishrug.“Idon’tknowyoueither.HowdoIknowonce

we’reoutsideyouwon’ttrytogetmeoutofmyclothesandhaveyourwaywithme?”

Shesmiles,anditrocksmyfuckingworld.“Ireallycouldusesomefreshair…”

Ipickuponherhesitation.“Passmeyourphone.”

WhatthefuckamIdoing?

Breakingallkindsofrulestonight,that’swhatI’mfuckingdoing.

“Whydoyouwantmyphone?”sheasksassheslidesitacrossthestickybartop.

Iholditup,andtakeaselfie.“There,nowyouhavemypicture.IfItryanythingyou

don’tlike,you’llhavemymugshotforthepolice.”

ShelooksatmelikeI’mabitinsane.MaybeIam,becauseIshouldreallyleavethis

alone.Shereachesforherpurse,andIsay,“Doyouneedtotellafriend?”

Hergazeflickerstothedancefloor,butnoneofherfriendsarepayinganyattentionto

her.Girlsaresupposedtolookoutforoneanotherwhenpartying—cometogetherandgo

together.Butitdoesn’tlooklikeshe’smadethatpactwithanyofthesedrunkpartygirls.

Shefrowns,ahintoflonelinessghostinghereyes,andmyheartsqueezes.Atleastshe’sin

goodhandswithme.She’ssweetandinnocentandIdon’t—okayIdo,butwon’t—want

anythingmorefromherthanaconversation.

“Yeah,let’sgetoutofhere,”shesays.

“Wait.”Ipulloutmyphoneandtakeapictureofher.“There,nowifyoutryanythingI

don’tlike,I’llhaveyourmugshot.”

Sheblinks,surprisedandIputmyhandonthesmallofherbackandguideheroutthe

door.Thenightairiswarm,sticky,butit’sabreakfromtheheatandbodiesinside.I

breathedeeplyasthewaveslapsagainstthesandinthedistance.

“I’mJustin,bytheway.”

“Violet.”

Pretty,justlikeher.

Themusicbecomesfaintasweremoveourshoesandstepontothesand.Sheexhales

andrunsthewarmgrainsbetweenherpaintedtoes.Paintedtoes.Fuck,that’ssexy,too.

Don’tgothere,dude.

“CanIaskaquestion?”

Herlongcurlsbouncearoundherfaceandshepursesherpouty,heart-shapedmouthas

herbigblueeyesmeetmine.“Youcanask,butitdoesn’tmeanI’llanswer.”

Beautifulandfunny.

Adangerouscombination.

Shedoesn’tknowI’mtheguywhodancedforher,soIneedtowordmyquestion

carefully.“Whatwereyoudoingatthebar?Itdoesn’tseemlikeit’syourkindofscene.”

“It’snotreally.Iworkwiththosegirls.We’renotclose,soIguessthat’showthey

thoughtIshouldcelebratemytwenty-firstbirthday.”

“I’veonlyknownyouforfiveminutesandIwouldneverthrowyouapartylikethat.”

“No?Thenwhatwouldyoudo?”sheasks.

Itakeinherskirt,thesleevelesssilkblouseshehastuckedintothehem,andsay,

“Quietdinner,walkonthebeach.”

“Youcantellallthatfromlookingatme.”

“Gutfeeling.”I’mnotabouttotellherI’mapsychologyprofessorandstudybehavior

andmind.HerbehaviortonighttoldmeeverythingIneededtoknow.She’sagoodgirl,

andIneedtostayaway.

Shearchesabrow.“You’reprettyintuitive.”

“You’rebeautiful.”Shit.Ihadn’tmeanttosaythat.Fuckingjustslippedout.Idon’t

wanthertothinkI’mcomingontoher.Sheturnsfromme,andlooksatthewater.I’m

prettysureshe’sabouttoruntheotherway.I’mastranger,eightyearsolderthanher,and

I’mprobablycomingofflikeastalker.

“Raceyoutothewater,”shesays,andtakesoff.“Lastonetherehastogoskinny

dipping.”

Skinnydipping?

Istandstillforamoment,processingthatasherskirtfliesaroundherbacksideandshe

dartstothewaves.She’snotthekindofgirltogoskinny-dipping,ofthatI’mcertain.My

brainkicksinandIchaseafterher.WhenIcatchher,she’slaughingandbreathless.

Jesusfuck,thesoundgoesstraightthroughme,andzapswhatlittlecontrolIseemto

havearoundher.Itouchherface,mythumbsweepingacrosshercheek.Herlaughdies

andhereyesgowideastheylatchontomine.

“Violet.”

“Yeah?”

“Ireallywanttokissyou.”

Amomentofhesitation,then,“Okay.”

Istepintoher,meshingmyhardnesswithhersoftness.Sweetfuck,mycockgrows

anotherinch,andshegivesalittlegaspwhenshefeelsit.“Sorry,”Isay,butsomehowI’m

not.Iactuallywanthertoknowshe’sbeautiful,seewhatshedoestome.Idipmyhead,

andsoftly,lightlybrushmylipsoverhers,notwantingtohurrythemomentImightnever

haveagain.

AmoanescapesherthroatandIslidemyhandtothebackofherneckasIincreasethe

pressure.Ipushmytongueinandwetangle.Icatchthetasteofthesyrupydrinkshe’d

beennursing,butit’snotnearlyassweetasher.Iclosemyeyes,savor,enjoy,drownin

herfloweryscentandtaste.I’monlyhalfawareasherhandssnakearoundmyback,her

questingfingerssplaying,touching,exploringmybody.

Iwanttodothesame.

Usingslowmovementssoasnottoscareher,Isweepmyhandslower,runmyfingers

alonghervertebraeuntilI’matthesmallofherback.Thesweetcurveofherasscallsout

tome.Idaretogolowerandcupherroundness,andmassagelightlyasIpullheragainst

mycock.

Asoundlodgesinherthroatasshebreaksfromthekiss.Ipullmyhandsaway,and

takeintheflushonhercheeksaswideeyesstareupatme.Okay,nowI’vegonetofar.

She’sgoingtorun.

“Youlost,”shesaysonabreathlesswhisper.

Herwordsareajumbledmessinmylust-filledbrain.“Lost?”

“Therace.”

Itonlytakesasecondformythoughtstocatchup.Holyfuck.Issheserious?

HereIthoughtshewasgoingtobolt,onlyforhertobestaringatme,waitingformeto

shedmyclothes.

Fine,I’llplayitherway.Fornow.

AboutCathrynFox

NewYorkTimesandUSAtodayBestsellingauthor,Cathrynisawife,mom,sister,
daughter,andfriend.Shelovesdogs,sunnyweather,anythingchocolate(sheneversays
notoabrownie)pizzaandredwine.Shehastwoteenagerswhokeepherbusywiththeir
neverendingactivities,andahusbandwhoisconvincedhecanturnherintoamixed
martialartsfan.Cathryncanneverfindbalanceinherlife,isalwaystryingtofindtimeto
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