Lee Brazil The Librarian

The Librarian

by Lee Brazil

Breathless Press

Calgary, Alberta

www.breathlesspress.com

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and

incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are

used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any

resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or

persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

The Librarian

ISBN: 978-1-926930-70-1

Cover Artist: Stacie Perkins

Editor: Olivia Ventura

or reproduced electronically or in print without written

permission, except in the case of brief quotations

embodied in reviews.

Breathless Press

www.breathlesspress.com

The Librarian

by Lee Brazil

Kisses kept are wasted;

Love is to be tasted.

There are some you love, I know;

Be not loath to tell them so.

Lips go dry and eyes grow wet

Waiting to be warmly met.

Keep them not in waiting yet;

Kisses kept are wasted.

—Edmund Vance Cooke

Prologue

Adrian sat on his bed, statistics book open in his lap, studying for

the test he had in the morning. The subject matter fascinated him, but

his attention kept drifting to the clock on the desk across the room.

The closer midnight came, the more frequently his gaze returned to

the red numbers. Where had Val gone? He’d said, but Adrian had

barely listened, absorbed in his book. What if something had hap-

pened to him?

His hand drifted toward the cell phone on his night table, and he

picked it up. He stared down at the little device, the latest technology

available. His parents had bought it and brought it up to him with his

clean laundry last Sunday. They’d been so proud of it, Dad explaining

all the neat features of the phone, Mom insisting on snapping a few

pictures of him with it.

Adrian had stayed in their dorm room since he’d left the library at

five. Val hadn’t called. He flipped the phone open and checked any-

way. Fully charged, as always. No messages, no calls. Except the three

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from his mother earlier, making sure he’d hung up the shirts she’d

ironed for him, reminding him to keep the phone charged, and to eat

vegetables with his dinner. He saved the messages. She would like

that.

He tried to turn his attention back to his book and the test that

loomed, but thoughts of what Val might be doing, and who he might

be doing it with, kept intruding. They hadn’t made any commitments,

but he and Val had shared a bed for the past week, and he’d known he

loved Val since October, when he’d kissed his blue-haired roommate

for the first time. A spontaneous, awkward, drunk kiss during a dorm

Halloween party, neither he nor Val had mentioned it when they so-

bered up the next day, though Adrian treasured the memory as the

most wonderful kiss he’d ever experienced.

That had been a month ago, and in the last few weeks Val had

broken up with his boyfriend, and Adrian secretly thrilled to hold his

friend and offer support. One thing had led to another, one fumbling

kiss to a caress, the caress to sex. From that night on, they had slept

here together, exploring and learning each other’s bodies, wants, and

desires.

But this morning, Val had mumbled something about not wait-

ing up for him. Adrian, too busy rushing to get ready for class and

his upcoming exam, paid Val little attention. Now he wished he had.

It might have saved him this anxious, sharp pain in his stomach, the

heaviness of his heart. Events were scheduled all over campus. He

had no chance of finding Val at any of them. Pep rallies, concerts, lec-

tures, study groups. He wouldn’t even recognize any of Val’s punky

friends if he ran into them.

The thump of feet in the hallway stopping outside their door drew

his attention. His gaze fastened on the door and he heard the click of

Val’s key in the lock as the knob turned. The sight of his roommate’s

flushed cheeks, plump, red, kiss-swollen lips, and crazily mussed

blue hair sent his heart plummeting and his stomach churning. He

swallowed to keep from throwing up, and forced himself to speak.

“Where have you been?” Adrian cringed at the whiny need in his

voice.

Val’s head turned in slow, languid fashion and Adrian flinched.

Fuck. He tried the word out inside his head, ignoring the heat along

his cheekbones. His mother would freak if he ever said it out loud. It

fit though. He knew that look. Val had just that look when he came.

When Adrian sucked his cock, or stroked him to orgasm, he looked

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exactly like that: sated, flushed, and happy. But Adrian hadn’t put

that look there tonight.

Val’s eyes lit up when he saw Adrian watching him, and he stum-

bled forward to collapse in a heap across the neatly folded quilt Adri-

an’s grandma had hand stitched for him as a graduation gift. “I’m in

love.” He moaned, twisting onto his side gingerly to face Adrian.

Adrian struggled to keep his face interested and not show his

devastation. He was in love too. “You went on a date?”

Val nodded, his eyes drifting closed dreamily. “He’s so awesome,

Adrian. He’s on the football team. Blond hair, blue eyes, the broadest

shoulders...” Voice trailing dreamily away, Val’s own blue-eyed gaze

snapped up and locked on Adrian’s. “And man, he’s got skills. I’ve

never felt like that before.”

Adrian nodded, keeping an encouraging look on his face, and he

closed the statistics book in his lap. No studying would happen now.

He listened, his heart breaking slowly, as Val described his new boy-

friend in elaborate detail.

Chapter One

Impatiently, Val flipped his powder-blue locks over his shoulder,

tapping the little whisk broom against the counter where his supplies

were arranged neatly. “Derek, you left me standing around at Paul’s

for an hour, a place I totally hate by the way, without even a phone

call to say you weren’t coming, and then I walk past you playing ball

in the park with your friends on the way back here. I’m not overreact-

ing!”

He ran a swift eye over his supplies. Scissors, combs, spray bottle

with water, gel, mousse... Everything seemed in order. While he pre-

pared his workstation, he listened with half an ear to the deep voice

on the other end of the phone, trying to explain or rationalize or what-

ever, but he wasn’t into hearing what Derek had to say. The guy was

an immature jerk who put his own wants ahead of everything, even

if it meant leaving Val standing in a group of young college kids he

barely knew, in a bar he usually avoided like the plague. He’d gone

to the party in the first place for Derek. Being stood up while doing

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something so selfless just pissed him off. Just once in a relationship,

Val wanted to find a guy who put him first, who loved him more than

sports, friends, and all the other temptations the wicked world of-

fered. “Just forget it, Derek. You don’t get it. It’s not just last night; it’s

the whole last few months.”

More rumbling and babbling in his ear. He ran a dust cloth over

the client’s chair and then adjusted its height. Prepping his station at

the salon was second nature and required little of his attention. Kind

of like listening to Derek. Why the fuck do I listen to this shit? Derek

had all the emotional understanding of a two-ton truck. Cute as hell,

but clueless about what would melt Val’s heart. In fact, Derek might

accurately be called a little dense altogether. A little consideration, a

romantic gesture or two, would go a long way. Hell, an apology in-

stead of an excuse would probably have gotten him a second chance

even this morning. Eh. Who are you kidding? Derek is a symptom, not

the illness itself. “Fuck off, Derek. It’s over. Do me a favor and lose my

number, okay?”

Flipping the phone shut, he shoved it into the pocket of his smock

and busied himself cleaning up his workspace. A quick spray of glass

cleaner to the mirror, a swipe or two with a rag and he was done.

Done with Derek, done with men, done with romance and love and

sex, and fuck it all. He could be celibate. Masturbation didn’t count as

sex, did it? He’d need something if he wasn’t getting any.

“Hey, Smurfette, your professor is here.”

It happened. Just like that. Ted’s sarcastic statement, delivered in

his superior nasal twang, made Val’s vow of celibacy probably the

shortest in history. He put down the small whisk broom he’d been us-

ing to clean up his already spotless workstation and dusted his hands

off on his powder-blue smock. The smock he had chosen deliberately

to match his hair this morning because it highlighted his eyes and

skin tone, even though he knew wearing it would invite Ted to make

Smurf comparisons,. He’d only just made the solemn promise to him-

self to take a break from men and get his head screwed on straight be-

fore venturing back into the dating arena. He’d been celibate for all of

five minutes maybe, if you didn’t count the previous six days when he

could have had sex if he wanted to with Derek, but he hadn’t because

he didn’t. Want to, that is.

He’d almost forgotten about his regular ten fifteen appointment

with Adrian Grey. Val shook his head. He knew better than that. That

would be a lie, and Valentine Michaels knew better than to lie. He

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did it so very badly. He could never completely forget about Adrian.

They’d been friends for nearly ten years, since they were roommates

in the dorm freshman year at NCU. Heck, for a few brief days, they’d

been something more than friends, even. Though he didn’t usually

primp like this for his exes.

Adrian Grey, though hot as hell, exemplified everything Val was

not looking for in a man. Where Val liked big, muscular men who

towered over him, Adrian was only an inch or so taller than he was.

Val preferred blonds, but Adrian wore his straight black hair cut long

enough to curl under his jawline in front and curved higher in back

to meet the university library’s requirement that all male employees

wear their hair above the collar. The wire-rim glasses he wore on a

fine rope around his neck gave him a distracted air of intelligence and

emphasized the almost delicate aspect of his refined features. His jaw-

line was smooth and silky, whereas Val preferred the sexy appeal of

rough, two-day stubble.

Everything about Adrian said successful, young professional.

Adrian was solid, dependable, and reliable. All those -able words that

no one had ever applied to Val. There was intelligence in those blue

eyes, and humor in the tilt of that rosy mouth, and sexy didn’t begin

to describe his lean, firmly muscled body.

“He’s a librarian, you ass,” he snapped at Ted. “And he’s not my

type.” Type or not, Val found himself checking out his hair in the mir-

ror, adjusting the powdery blue strands as he bit then licked his lips.

Ah, well, he was a beautician, wasn’t he? He had to look good, even

for the clients who didn’t want something creative in their personal

look. Surreptitiously he breathed on his hand, checking his breath,

and swiped his lips with a tube of clear gloss he pulled from the pock-

et of his smock. And, he reasoned triumphantly, he could appreciate

beauty where he saw it for the exact same reason! And Adrian was

beautiful in his geeky way.

He looked up and met Adrian’s eyes in the mirror as the other

man strode to the reception desk to receive his share of the crap that

Ted dished out without prejudice. Mmm. That blue oxford really brings

out the sparkle in Adrian’s eyes, doesn’t it?

“Come on back, I’m all ready for you.” You have no idea how ready.

He snickered inside as he spun the chair and waved Adrian to sit.

He always chatted away while trimming Adrian. It wasn’t like

he needed to concentrate in order to trim Adrian’s hair into the same

style he’d been wearing for the past six years. He rolled his eyes. An-

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other thing about Adrian that was so not his type: Adrian resisted

change. He even used the same fucking cell phone he’d had in college.

Val used to try to convince Adrian to try a new cut once in a while, but

Adrian liked what he liked and refused all offers to dye, cut or curl

his hair into something other than the style he already wore. The chat

kept him distracted from the heat of Adrian’s body and the enticing

scent of his cologne. It prevented his imagination from running away

with him. In the past, the conversation had served as a reminder to

himself that Adrian was off-limits.

Gesturing slightly with his scissors and comb, he asked, already

knowing what the answer would be, “So, are you going to let me cut

this in a different style for you today?”

As expected, Adrian simply shook his head and seated himself in

the waiting chair.

“So,” Adrian said, when Val found himself tongue-tied for the

first time in their long history of Friday morning haircuts, “what’s

new in your life? Or should I say, who’s new in your life? Ted just told

me you broke up with Derek.”

Val flushed. Was that really the impression he’d given of himself?

He came off as the kind of guy who couldn’t last a week without a

lover?

A bit hurt, he snapped, “What? Like I always have to have a boy-

friend? There’s no one right now. After that dumb shit Derek, I’m tak-

ing a break from men for a while.”

Adrian jerked in the chair, and Val cursed. “Be still. You could

end up with a new hairstyle whether you want one or not, jumping

like that!”

“Sorry. Just what exactly do you mean by taking a break from

men?” The other man seemed bewildered for some reason.

“I mean,” he declared dramatically, tossing his head, “I’ve taken a

vow of celibacy. I’m swearing off men, drama, and love.”

Adrian laughed softly. “Oh. That’ll last. The next pretty boy with

bulging muscles who strolls through that door for a haircut, or offers

to buy you a drink at the bar, and you’ll be back in the game, heart-

break forgotten.”

Val gasped. “Oh, that was uncalled for! I’m not exactly heartbro-

ken, just reevaluating where I stand on some issues. I’m tired of lead-

ing such a messy life. I need to figure myself out before I get involved

with anyone else.”

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“I’m sorry.” Adrian apologized. “I shouldn’t tease you. It’s just

that I’ve known you since we were freshmen at the university, and

ever since then, for ten years, you’ve always had a boyfriend—usually

some muscle-bound, superhero jock-type.”

Sighing, Val stilled his hands and met Adrian’s eyes in the mirror.

There was sympathy in the blue depths, but more, there lurked some-

thing indecipherable that he hadn’t seen before. “It’s not just Derek,

Adrian.” He confessed in a low voice. “It’s all of it. Everything. The

shop bores me. The bars and clubs are filled with younger and young-

er people every time I go, and I’m like a babysitter, or God forbid, my

mother. Have you heard that crap they call music now?” He shook

his head and went back to trimming fractions of hair from silky black

locks and brushing strays from the blue oxford collar. Finished, he put

aside the tools of his trade.

Adrian rose from his chair and scribbled something on a card he

pulled from his shirt pocket. “Here’s my cell number. Call me anytime

if you need someone to listen or want to get together.”

Val stared as the other man turned and left the salon, brushing

stray hairs from his shirt as he did so. Down, boy. He glared at his cock

where it arched up beneath the buttons of his 501s. He’s not your type,

remember? No amount of lecturing could convince his dick though.

Maybe type was one of the things he’d need to reevaluate. He tossed

the number in the trash, almost hoping Adrian would see him do it.

Like he needed it. He’d had that phone number memorized for ten

years. Not that he used it. Who needed a phone call when Adrian

arrived every Friday, regular as clockwork? Slowly he wandered to

the front of the shop, past Ted in his black, horn-rimmed glasses and

bleach-splattered clothing, and on out the door, starting as he realized

he was following Adrian.

Chapter Two

Adrian stepped out of the salon into the bright sunshine of a per-

fect Colorado spring day. In the time since he’d entered the salon,

the sky glowed bluer, the grass greener, the clouds more perfectly

cottony white than ever. The mingled scents of fresh-cut grass and

newly opened blossoms wafted gently to his quivering nostrils. Some-

thing he’d kept locked away for years had been let loose, and his mind

raced, heart beating frantically to keep pace. He tried to still the wild

surges of emotion that rushed through his body, heart and soul. Val

was flaky. Whatever he said, he could well be in love before lunch-

time.

Adrian trembled with impatient emotion. His hand shook so bad-

ly he almost couldn’t open the door of his car, the ever-faithful, ever-

reliable gray 1993 Acura Integra, christened Myrtle by his high school

buddy, Shane. His parents had researched fuel efficiency and reliabil-

ity before selecting the car as his sixteenth birthday present. In the

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thirteen years since, he’d kept it pristine and running smoothly. No

sense replacing something that functioned so beautifully, was there?

He’d sensed Val’s interest in him today, for the first time in years,

despite his avowals of abstinence. A vague sensation of heat had radi-

ated from Val and he had absorbed it like a sponge.

He now had a distinct advantage in the waiting game he’d been

playing with Val since freshman year. Years’ worth of chatty confes-

sions about what Val liked and didn’t like in a lover would guide his

own courtship. And the other man had just cleared the field for him

with his intention to stay out of the dating scene. A Val who wasn’t

even looking to hook up, didn’t have someone waiting on the side,

and seemed strangely vulnerable, was a Val that Adrian could work

with, not like the flip, sexually confident, blindly selfish Val he’d been

friends with all these years.

Adrian started the car and looked into his rearview mirror, hop-

ing for another glimpse of Val through the shop windows of Sherri’s

Hair. He didn’t quite get why Val hadn’t changed the name when he’d

bought it. In fact, Val hadn’t changed anything about the shop when

he’d bought it as far as Adrian could tell. It still had the same cracked

vinyl chairs and lavender paint that had graced it the first day Adrian

had gone in. He knew he’d paused too long when Val appeared in the

doorway of the shop, and seemed to be looking after him.

Behind Val he noted the For Lease sign on the building next door.

How simple a solution to Val’s problem was that? If he was bored

with his business, then he could always lease the shop next door and

expand. A full-service salon with tanning booths, piercing studio and

a permanent makeup artist...Yes. This would make an excellent segue

into another meeting with Val. And...he could always offer to help.

That would allow them to spend even more time together. He’d paint-

ed his fair share of rooms out on the small-town, Colorado ranch his

parents owned.

Still in a reverie, he pulled the gray sedan out into the minimal

flow of traffic and headed back down the street to the university. His

job in the archives of the business library was interesting and had

great potential for upward movement. He enjoyed it. It also gave

him ample time to do his research, write his articles, and contemplate

which PhD program he wanted into. He’d finally decided, narrowing

the options down to three, and sent in his applications a few months

ago. He looked forward to the challenges furthering his education

would bring. The lull in activity, no articles contracted, no application

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or research to deal with, left him with a down period. For a while,

anyway. It also provided him with ample time to contemplate the di-

rection of his seduction.

Pulling into his parking space in the reserved employee lot behind

the library, he shut off the engine and grabbed his planner. He printed

a neat list on the page dated for today, underneath the notation for his

haircut. He snorted when he saw it. Every Monday morning he wrote

that appointment in for Friday morning in ink. Not that he needed the

reminder to go get his hair cut. It was just the permanence of the ink

and the sight of Val’s name. It grounded him throughout the week to

know that he had that to look forward to.

He relied on that appointment with a ferocity that almost scared

him sometimes. He knew exactly how each appointment would go,

and they played and replayed in his mind during the days between

appointments. Ted would announce his arrival; Val would offer to cut

his hair differently. He would refuse. He shook his head, enjoying the

sensual slide of silky hair across his cheek. Every Friday he refused

and Val hadn’t even the slightest idea why. He seemed to forget that

he had designed this cut expressly for Adrian when he’d accepted his

job in the university library years ago.

Adrian had been excited by the job offer; it was a step in the right

direction for a candidate in the Master’s of Library Science program,

but the university dress code for staff had mandated that his long

black hair had to go. Though thrilled with the offer, he’d been reluc-

tant to cut the hair he’d been growing since freshman year. It had been

his first Friday morning appointment with Val, before Val owned the

shop, even. Val had coaxed him into the chair and chattered away

through the cutting process to distract him as the long locks fell to

the floor, one by one. Adrian had kept his eyes locked on Val in the

mirror, refusing to contemplate the loss of his one claim to rebellion.

He hadn’t realized what Val had done until he’d finished and

handed him the mirror. His black hair had been left slightly longer

around his face and cut to the university’s above-the-collar require-

ment in back. The cut fulfilled the university’s demands, but it also

acknowledged the deep-seated, seldom-seen need to express himself

that led Adrian to grow his hair long in the first place.

Like he’d ever let Val take back that gift! He’d keep the cut until he

got to keep the man.

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Speaking of which, he needed to plan. He needed to keep Val off

balance, keep him interested like he’d been this morning, to show him

the Adrian he’d grown into instead of the Adrian he used to be.

And who, he asked himself, do you want Val to see? The lovesick

fool who’s pined over a man he couldn’t have for ten years? No. Not

so much that Adrian. Let’s keep that one inside for a while longer. He

would show Val the Adrian who had listened to his complaints, the

one who knew that Val wanted to be romanced, mastered, loved, not

just fucked.

The conversations he’d been gritting his teeth through for years

gave him all the information he needed to do just that.

He reached for his cell phone to call his mom, but remembered

just in time. Couldn’t do that anymore. When would he remember

that? He picked up the phone, the same one his parents had bought

him years ago. Everyone, and by everyone he meant Val and Phil, told

him he should replace it with a newer model, one with apps, and In-

ternet access, and a whole lot of other foolishness. He always laughed

them off with a “why fix what isn’t broken” speech, but while in the

past that had been the truth, now this phone had something no newer,

more modern phone would ever have.

It had been chosen for him by his parents, and they’d been so ex-

cited about it. But beyond that, he flipped the phone open and scrolled

through messages before finding the one he wanted. The phone was

like a voice from beyond the grave for him. Those messages he’d duti-

fully saved years ago were his connection to his mom and dad, who’d

been gone now for over three years. Three years ago, on their way to

see him, bringing him clean laundry and home-cooked meals for his

freezer, their vehicle had been run off the road by a car full of drunken

college boys on their way home from a football game.

His mother’s sweet, loving voice chattered away in his ear. “Tell

Val we enjoyed meeting him, and you keep me posted on how things

work out with that boy! Dad and I love you. Take care!”

“I will, Mom. I love you too,” he whispered into the phone, re-

sponding as always as though he were talking to her in the flesh. After

carefully hitting resave to extend the life of the message once again, he

folded the phone and slipped it into his pocket, patting the pocket to

make sure it was secure. He’d need it to call the flower shop, where he

would find the perfect single bloom to send to Val. Something exotic

and vibrant that was not a rose or a daisy. He remembered Val’s snide

comments about boyfriends of the past who’d sent flowers.

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His mother would be pleased if he and Val managed to get it right

this time around. She’d always liked his roommate, and even coun-

seled him to be patient and maintain his friendship with Val after that

night years ago. For years, on many a Saturday morning in the old

ranch house kitchen, he poured his heartaches and fancies into her

ear, telling her the things he wanted to tell Val, absorbing her love and

comfort in return.

Now, he had the opportunity he’d been so patiently waiting for,

the chance his mother had assured him would one day arrive, and he

intended to make the most of it.

Chapter Three

“Hey,” Ted’s nasal voice called as Val finished pinning the elderly

Mrs. Grogan’s white hair into tiny pinwheels. The fragile old lady had

a standing Friday appointment for a wash and set, and continually

refused Val’s suggestions for a new style, just like Adrian.

Damn, there the man popped into his head again! Mrs. Grogan

had been a loyal customer of the salon long before he’d even consid-

ered being a stylist, and when he’d earned the money to buy the place

from Sherri, she’d stayed a loyal customer, insisting that Val and Val

alone had the skills necessary to wash, trim, pin and curl her ‘do, as

she called it. Val had barely chased thoughts of contemplative blue

eyes and the sexy slide of silky hair through his fingers out of his

head. It was more than an hour after Adrian left the salon. More than

enough time that Val’s admittedly short attention span should have

found something else to focus on—someone else, rather.

“What is it, Ted?” he asked sharply, frustrated with himself, with

Adrian, and with Ted’s usual attitude.

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“Delivery for you. Looks like someone misses you.” Ted paused

in wiping the counter, glass cleaner in one hand, rag in the other, and

clicked his tongue stud impatiently against his teeth as he gestured

at the youthful delivery boy on the opposite side of the glass counter.

Ted managed to sound snide even when he wasn’t.

Val looked over to see the bemused youth setting a bud vase down

on the counter while a scowling Ted signed the slip. The simple white

vase held a single, vibrant orange bloom, a bird of paradise blossom

backed by a single broad, dark, glossy green leaf. A creamy white en-

velope was perched in front of the bloom.

Flowers were so not Derek’s thing. A little guilt for not giving

Derek a second chance niggled at Val’s conscience, but he brushed

it away. The big lump probably still couldn’t figure out how he had

failed to make Val happy in their relationship. This gesture, though

belated, at least showed an attempt at pleasing Val. Who knew the

man had listened when Val derided roses and daisies as tokens of

love? Trite and oversimplified, he called them when past lovers had

sent them. Of course, he’d never received any “just because” roses and

daisies. Always the flowers said, “Sorry, I fucked up.” Wouldn’t it be

nice to receive “Hey, I was thinking of you” flowers, or, God forbid, “I

fucking love you even though you’re an ass” flowers?

He scowled. None of his boyfriends had ever been the type to

engage in romantic gestures. He’d sent a few of those kinds of flowers

himself, but never received any.

“Aren’t you going to read the card, dear boy?” It was Mrs. Gro-

gan’s sweet, feathery voice that drew his attention back to the flower.

“Oh yeah. Sure. Hand me that card, Ted.” He reached out and

took the card, testing its weight and thickness in his hand. It was nice

paper, heavy and smooth in his grip. Clearly the gift came from an ex-

pensive shop. Where had Derek gotten the extra cash for flowers like

this? Maybe he sincerely regretted standing Val up? Too late, though.

Val’s subsequent lack of interest in Derek’s whereabouts and activi-

ties had cleared up the issue of Derek, in his own mind, anyway. He

didn’t love the guy. Didn’t miss him at all. Why, he spent more time

wondering what Adrian was up to than missing Derek. Fuck. There

was Adrian invading his mind again. Contemplating what that said

about himself wasn’t on Val’s agenda, though. He was just relieved

not to be heartbroken.

He caught a faint whiff of scent on the creamy envelope and drew

it to his nose. The envelope was scented with some spicy, sexy, vague-

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ly familiar cologne that he definitely didn’t recognize as belonging

to any past lovers. Still, it seemed vaguely familiar. He sniffed again

and decided that he liked it. He drew the card out of the envelope and

found it unsigned, just a simple heart drawn in pencil on the card.

He laughed to see a few smudged eraser marks on the card as well. It

looked like Derek had had trouble deciding what to say.

“Well?” The other two waited impatiently to discover the identity

of his admirer and he laughed, showing them the card.

“I guess we’ll have to wait and see.” He smiled at the flower. That

vibrant warm flower sitting on his workstation told him someone re-

garded him kindly, someone knew him enough to know he would en-

joy the unusual bloom. He frowned, convinced now that Derek hadn’t

sent the flower. He could confirm it with a phone call, but no way was

he giving Derek the chance to talk him into anything.

The orange blossom drew his eye repeatedly during the rest of

the afternoon, and the scent of the cologne teased his memory from

where he had placed the card and envelope in the pocket in the front

of his smock.

That cheerful orange blossom, its mysterious source and mean-

ing, occupied Val’s thoughts as he unlocked his shop door in the early

gray hours of Saturday morning to find an envelope on the doormat

where someone had pushed it under the door. His name was scrawled

across it in undeniably masculine writing in an unbelievably hideous

purple ink. Inside was a sheet of paper bearing the letterhead of the

bakery at the end of the strip mall. In the same purple ink, his corre-

spondent had written, “Take this into the bakery to pick up your treat,

sweet.” No signature. Cute. First the flower, now this. He was being

stalked by a teenage Lothario, or worse, considering the purple ink, a

teenage girl. Great, just what he needed.

He shook his head as he pushed the paper back into the envelope.

He’d head down to the bakery after the rest of the staff came in. He

did paperwork on Saturdays and let the other stylists who worked

for him take care of the customers. Meanwhile, he scooped up the

colorful bird-of-paradise flower from his workstation and carried it

with him. He’d need the cheerful bloom to get through the paperwork

today.

Owning the salon seemed to be the end of the road for his busi-

ness success. He’d made it. He’d shown old Dick and Martha Michaels

that their fag son didn’t need the family money or support to make his

way in the world. Where’d the sense of satisfaction from signing the

The Librarian

papers on the business go? Where was the thrill of accomplishment

when he walked through the doors?

He made his way to the back of the shop, noting the dingy paint

job and cracked vinyl of the chairs as he did so. The shop itself, despite

being highly successful and prosperous, seemed as depressed as he

was. Maybe a remodel? Some bright new paint and fixtures might go

a long way to freshening up his shop and restoring his enthusiasm for

his work. Adrian might be willing to help him pick out colors, could

probably even be relied upon to help with the actual painting.

He shook his head. Fuck. There was Adrian again, in his head.

But...Adrian had an artistic side. In fact, Adrian had a responsible,

dependable streak, and he’d never turn down a friend who asked for

his help, either. He’d always been there for Val, since they’d been as-

signed to the same dorm room freshman year, a sound, solid, reliable

man who listened when Val talked, offering support, encouragement,

and never judging or criticizing.

Chapter Four

Tabling the idea of remodeling until he could speak with Adrian

when he came in for his haircut next Friday, Val sat in his tiny little of-

fice shaking his head over the quarterly tax forms he needed to fill out.

He hated paperwork, especially paperwork that involved accounting.

Through his frustration with numbers that wouldn’t add up to the

same figure twice, he heard Ted’s nasal cry, “Hey! Your professor is

here!”

He jumped out of his swivel chair so quickly that he banged his

knee on the dingy gray file cabinet he always forgot to close. His care-

fully arranged piles of papers scattered in a cascade to the dingy floor,

unnoticed. Adrian was here? On a Saturday?

The murmur of Adrian’s deep voice followed by Ted’s nasal one

and the cheery chirps from his two young stylists brought him out of

his office into the main room of the salon. Yep. There Adrian stood,

looking better than Val had ever seen him in dark blue jeans and a

silky, blue, short-sleeve T-shirt. He wore casual black sandals and Val

The Librarian

blinked as he caught a glimpse of what appeared to be an ankle brace-

let of thick silver links.

Adrian turned in his direction as Val walked to the front of the

salon, and smiled quizzically. He gestured to a carafe of coffee and

pink bakery box from the corner shop. “I stopped in at the bakery to

see if you liked your treat, and they said you hadn’t been in yet, so I

figured I’d bring it to you.”

Adrian? Adrian was his secret admirer? Not that he’d claimed

any such thing. Though really, he shouldn’t be surprised. Hadn’t

he just told himself that Adrian was thoughtful and a good listener?

“You sent me the flower? And the note in purple ink?” He gestured

toward his workstation before remembering that he had placed the

bloom carefully on his desk this morning so he could enjoy it while he

worked. The idea of Adrian writing in purple ink stunned him more

than the idea that Adrian had a crush on him. After all, they’d been

down that road once before. Purple ink was so not Adrian. Black. Or

blue. Traditional. Classic. That was Adrian.

“Yeah, did you like it? Here, grab a cup of coffee and a pastry, and

let’s take a walk.” The other man turned and walked out the door, ap-

parently assuming that Val would follow.

Val grabbed a coffee and hurried to catch up with Adrian. Jeez.

Now what would he do? He had to let Adrian down gently. No sense

ruining what had been a perfectly good friendship. No way could he

ask Adrian to help with the redecorating project now. Distance, not

closeness, was called for.

“Listen, Adrian, we have to talk. I really meant it when I said I’m

not interested in men right now and honestly,” he touched the other

man’s arm sympathetically, “you’re just not my type, you know? So,

much as I appreciate all the little gestures, I just feel friendship for

you, okay?”

The other man’s blue eyes sparkled at him, in apparent—amuse-

ment? “Are you done, Val?”

“Well, yeah, that’s what I wanted to say. No hard feelings, right?”

“Right, Val. Let me set you straight on a few things before we talk

about feelings, okay? First of all, I noticed you were down Friday, so

I sent you the flower, yeah. I love those bird of paradise flowers. The

colors are so sunny and cheerful. Then this morning, I wanted to talk

to you about something, and sorry, but the coffee and pastries were

as much because I knew I’d be hungry as for you. Yeah, you’re hot as

hell, but I know I’m not your type. And you know I know it too. That’s

Lee Brazil

why you’ve been ramming tales about your wild and crazy love life

down my throat for the past ten years, isn’t it? I’ve heard about every

new man as soon as you’ve met him, and every breakup when it in-

evitably comes along. Why do you do that, Val? It’s not for your own

benefit, you know? You’ve been making sure that I knew that you

weren’t interested in hooking up with me. I fucking get it, okay? You

don’t seem to see that I’m not the same man today as ten years ago.

And that’s your loss, not mine. I’ve done things, experienced things in

the last few years that have helped me define who and what I am, in

and out of bed, Val. Too bad you can’t say the same.”

Val swallowed and pulled his hand back. He shook his head as his

brain whirled trying to keep up, to comprehend all the data Adrian

threw at him in one long speech. “Whoa. Sorry. I just talk while I’m

working, you know? I... Shit...sorry.”

Adrian sighed and led him to a small wrought iron bench on the

sidewalk in front of the vacant shop next door. They sat side by side,

turned to face each other. Val watched Adrian’s pale hand absently

trace the patterns of the ironwork. His wicked mind created a visual

image of the same pale hand tracing so lovingly over his body, strok-

ing his cock. He tried to remember that sensation from so long ago.

Adrian’s hand had been on his body, more than once. Damn. Why

couldn’t he remember it? Shaking his head, he thrust the thoughts

aside angrily. What the fuck did it matter how that felt? They were

just friends, right?

“Look, it’s not a big deal. You’re hot, and I’ll admit it. I’ve always

said that, since freshman year. But ever since you got caught up with

that dumbass, muscle-bound, football-playing jock who dumped you

freshman year, you’ve been interested in only one type of man, and it

isn’t me. But if you’re honest, you’ll admit that you find me attractive

too. Doesn’t mean anything, right? We’re just friends, and I want to

be here for you as a friend, while you’re doing this soul searching and

reevaluating. You already know I make a great listener and I already

know all your secrets anyway.”

Val nodded doubtfully. “I do, yes, find you to be an attractive man.

And you’re right, friends can think that about each other, if you’re

sure it’s just a friends thing. So, what did you want to see me about?”

He watched Adrian suspiciously for signs that he was making some-

thing up, lying about not wanting more from him than friendship.

Surely Adrian was being just a little too perfect?

The Librarian

Adrian waved at the window behind them. Val turned and looked

into the shell of a shop. The used bookstore that had been there up un-

til a few months ago had gone out of business and nothing remained

inside except oddly faded carpets and a few broken wooden shelves.

It was as old and faded as his own shop. Uncomprehending, he turned

back to Adrian. “The bookstore?”

Adrian shook his head, smiling slightly. “It’s not a bookstore any-

more, Val. Now it’s empty, just waiting for someone with imagination

to come along and transform it.”

A spark of interest stirred in Val’s breast. Adrian was going to

open a shop, possibly next door to his salon? What kind of shop

would it be? Another bookstore? He could totally see Adrian owning

a bookstore. But would he really leave his job at the library to do that?

Talk about change! That was so not Adrian. “You’re going to open a

shop here next to me?” Damn—why did that sound so good?

“Ahhh, no, Val. I’m not. You know owning a shop is not part of

my life plan. I’m suggesting you lease it and expand your shop. Imag-

ine it.” He pointed through the glass again. “Tear down that dividing

wall, and you’ll have the space for more stylists, a permanent makeup

artist, a piercing station or two. The possibilities are endless. Your

business bores you? Recreate it.”

Adrian stood up and smiled down at Val. He turned to walk away

and then turned back, his eyes twinkling as he said, “And just so you

know, I can sense your eyes hot on my ass when I’m walking away.

Have for years, so don’t think you’re getting away with that!”

Val spluttered as he was caught in the act of admiring that same

ass. Shit. He was more than fucked up. He had the sneaking suspicion

that Adrian was right about everything he’d said. He had been tell-

ing Adrian way more about his love life than he would ever consider

sharing with another client. Was he really trying to keep Adrian at a

distance by throwing his boyfriends up in his face? And how embar-

rassing was it to know that Adrian had actually been aware of his

lustful gaze on that gorgeous ass all this time?

Embarrassed, he turned back to the empty shop behind them.

Painting and refurnishing his own shop was one thing, taking on a

complete remodel and adding to the services he offered was another

entirely. It was a huge commitment, and one he honestly wasn’t sure

he could handle. Still, the idea appealed to him. A lot. Almost as much

as the idea of having Adrian working nearby.

Chapter Five

Adrian was smiling when he slid back behind his desk in the busi-

ness library on Monday morning. His coworker, Phil, a tall blond who

had been in the same Master’s program he’d attended, looked up and

said, “Now are you ready to tell me about this great weekend? New

man?”

Adrian smiled more broadly and shook his head. He and Phil car-

pooled to work as they both lived in the same neighborhood, an old

district of town with little craftsman-style homes and cracked side-

walks. At this point they could each afford more affluent housing in

nicer, newer neighborhoods, but Adrian loved his old house and the

memories it held. Phil had his own reasons for keeping the house next

door, a lot of them tied into the extensive remodeling and decorating

he’d done in the basement level to create an adult playroom. Adrian

and Phil had spent some time playing in that room, but things hadn’t

worked out for them. Though Phil had introduced him to the world

The Librarian

of D/s, Adrian had quickly discovered that the role of submissive was

not for him.

Aside from Val, Phil was his oldest friend. They’d met in college

and followed similar paths to their current jobs. “Nope. Just finally

making some progress with an old one.”

“Wow. You mean your hot hairdresser? Really? After all these

years?” Phil’s avid interest was evident as he set down his steaming

coffee cup and leaned forward, eager to hear more, resting his chin on

the palm of one broad hand.

Adrian smiled at Phil’s interest. He owed a lot to Phil. When his

parents died, and he wasn’t comfortable approaching Val, Phil had

stood by him, an arm to lean on, and a friend to confide in. In some

respects, strange as it might seem for a man of his own age, Phil had

taken the place of his mother in his life, at least the mother whose role

had been confidante. He’d been genuinely happy for Phil when he

and Ashe met and clicked last year, even if their obvious happiness

made him a little impatient with Val’s slower progress to maturity.

While he’d grown and matured from the point of needing or wanting

guidance from the men in his life, Val still seemed to be stuck, a per-

petual eighteen-year-old.

“Yes, finally! I made some significant progress this weekend in

that direction.” He sat in his creaky, brown leather chair and leaned

forward, switching on his computer and printer. His phone vibrated

against his hip in the pocket of his dress pants. He paused to scoop

out the phone and flipped it open to see that the call was from Val.

“Speaking of...” He nodded at the other man and leaned back in his

chair. “Hi, Val.” He purposely kept his voice calm and bland despite

the instant rush of sensation as his heartbeat sped up.

“Umm, hi. Adrian. It’s Val. I got your number from the client list.”

Val sounded unusually flustered in contrast to his own coolness.

Huh. Hadn’t he just given Val his phone number last week? He

didn’t like the implication of Val having to look it up.

He met Phil’s curious brown gaze with a smile and turned to the

side to gain a modicum of privacy, not that he didn’t fully expect Phil

to weasel all the details of the conversation out of him by lunchtime

anyway.

“That’s fine. What’s up, Val?”

“I just wanted to say that I do.” Now Val’s voice was so low, Adri-

an wasn’t even sure he’d heard it correctly.

“Excuse me?” he asked. “You do what?”

Lee Brazil

“I’m sorry. I realized you’re right. I do do that. What you said yes-

terday. I try to put a lid on my attraction to you by talking about my

boyfriends and the other thing too.”

“What other thing?” Adrian smiled triumphantly. No way was he

making anything easy for Val after the years of hell the other man had

put him through.

“Looking at your ass. I’m sorry. You do have a fine ass, and I do

look at it when I get the chance.” Val sounded pissed now, as though

he resented being forced to admit to his actions. Too fucking bad.

Adrian had every intention of forcing Val to admit to a lot more before

this thing between them was over. Actually, before it even started,

because with any luck it never would be over, per se.

He spun his chair back to face Phil’s blond head as his computer

beeped. “That’s okay, Val, looking’s free. You can stare at my ass all

you want. I’ll even go so far as to say I like you doing it.”

Phil sputtered a stream of coffee over his desk, splattering some

onto Adrian’s as well. Damn. That noise had to be audible to Val.

“What was that? Is there someone with you?” Now Val sounded

horrified. “Can someone else actually hear me? You ass!”

“Val, calm down. It’s just my coworker choking on his coffee. He

can’t hear us.” He quickly gestured Phil to silence and the other man

made a zipping-his-lips motion in response, leaning back in his chair

with exaggerated slow movements.

“Oh, okay. Sorry. I have to go; I just wanted to clear the air after

yesterday. Make sure that you know that I’m not interested in dating

anyone right now, even though I do find you attractive. I value your

friendship and...really, we make better friends than we would lovers.”

Val had regained his usual savoir faire as that last bit came out, sound-

ing positive and possibly even defiant.

Ouch. One step forward and a giant leap backward. What would

Val expect him to say? What response would best suit his plans? He’d

make Val pay for that later. His eyes narrowed at Phil, Adrian bit out

in a deliberately dark tone, “Val. Let me make this clear to you for

hopefully the last time. I am not asking you out on a date. I am not go-

ing to mistake any interaction between us for a date. Please wait to be

asked before you turn me down. And just for future reference, when

it comes to dating, I am very old fashioned. I prefer to do the asking.”

He flipped the phone shut and shoved it in a drawer, shrugging at

Phil and turning to his computer to bring up a project he’d been work-

ing on. He had every hope that Val would eventually come to realize

The Librarian

what he had always known, that they were meant to be together. Val

was just so easily influenced, so easily distracted. Both traits he could

use to his advantage.

“So, tell me, Adrian, what exactly is your definition of progress?

Because that sounded like anything but.” Phil looked at him quizzi-

cally, brown eyes sympathetic.

“Oh, believe me, with Val, that’s progress.” Ignoring the other

man’s doubtful expression, he turned his attention to the work of the

day.

***

When Adrian removed his phone from the desk drawer at the

end of the day, the message from Val didn’t surprise him. He smiled.

Walking out of the building beside Phil, he showed the other man the

phone. “See? It’s working already.”

Phil looked at him in surprise. “Wow! You really do know him

well. Want me to wait for you by the car so you can call him back?”

Adrian shook his head. “No. I’m not going to call him back. Ever

heard of The Rules?”

“Umm. No. You have rules for dating?” Phil seemed to find that

funny, and Adrian laughed.

“Not usually, no. But this is my mom’s advice from her mom way

back when. She always swore by these dating rules, said they helped

her land my dad. The first rule was, never return a phone call the same

day. Waiting makes the caller very eager to hear from you. A little bit

of uncertainty goes a long way in forging a relationship.”

“Yeah? So are you going to ask him out when you call him back?”

Phil was a great guy, but a little dense for someone with a Master’s in

Library Science.

“No. I already told him I wasn’t going to ask him out. He’s going

to ask me out.” He unlocked the car doors and waved Phil in.

“But, you told him you like to do the asking.” Phil seemed con-

fused.

“I do. And I will. But not yet. He’s going to ask me to do stuff with

him, as friends, and I’m going to say yes sometimes, and no some-

times. Then when the time is right, I’ll ask him out, and he will say

yes.” Adrian nodded firmly. No way would this plan not work. Val

was already close to caving on the key issue: spending time together.

“You’re one devious son of a bitch, Adrian.”

Chapter Six

Val was hiding in his office. He knew it. Ted knew it. The whole

staff knew it. He didn’t care. He was thoroughly confused by his bi-

zarre interactions with the gorgeous, highly fuckable, suddenly unat-

tainable librarian. Somehow he’d had the idea all along that he could

have Adrian any time he wanted, and he’d always kind of enjoyed the

other man’s silent, lusty regard.

He had a horrible suspicion he’d been making an idiot of him-

self over the other man. He’d found Adrian attractive for years, it was

true, and had known that Adrian found him attractive as well. But if

Adrian truly did prefer to make the first move in his relationships,

then all this really was just an effort to be a good friend, and Val could

really use someone to talk to right now. His whole life was practically

in a shambles. He had a nice income from his shop, with a good mix

of loyal clientele and walk-ins, both old and young people, but there

was no room for the shop to grow and the creative aspect of his work

had long since died off.

The Librarian

He found the club scenes and the men he dated tedious and bor-

ing, his apartment confining, and nothing in his life seemed to fit any-

more. It seemed that Adrian might possess some insight into his char-

acter, and he truly was a good listener. On impulse, he grabbed the

phone and called Adrian back. It went straight to voicemail, so he left

a message inviting Adrian to meet him for lunch the next day. As he

hung up the phone, he had a vaguely uneasy sensation, as though he

may have just made a mistake of some sort. But he had to believe that

Adrian told the truth when he said that he wouldn’t consider them as

being on a date unless Adrian did the asking himself. He smiled. As

long as he did the asking, he could spend as much time as he wanted

with Adrian without worrying about dating.

He whistled as he shut the door on his tiny office and surveyed

his shop. Everyone looked well-taken-care of, and he nodded at Ted

to tell him he was going.

***

When Tuesday morning came with no phone call from Adrian,

Val began to get concerned. Should he call back? Was he being too

impatient? Why hadn’t Adrian called? His morning was tense, and

finally, at lunch he caved in and decided to just fucking call again.

Palms damp, he listened as the phone rang. The message he planned

to leave ran on a continuous loop through his head. Hello, Adrian.

This is Val. No. Maybe, Hi, it’s Val. Yeah. Hi, it’s Val. I just called to

see if you were free... No. Um. Hey, Adrian, are you free for lunch to-

day? Yeah. That was it. Casual.

Adrian picked up, startling him.

“Oh, Adrian, hi,” he mumbled. Fuck. He’d had a message pre-

pared, hadn’t really expected to speak to Adrian.

“Val?” Adrian sounded amused, sexy and confident. “What’s

up?”

“I wondered if you’d like to have lunch with me? I have some

time and no clients this afternoon, so...” Shit. His voice trailed off into

silence and met more silence.

“Val, I’d love to have lunch with you sometime.” Muted laughter

interrupted Adrian. “But not today. I’m actually at lunch now with

a friend.” The soothing tone of Adrian’s voice ruffled Val’s nerves

almost as much as the wicked-sounding male laughter in the back-

ground. Adrian said something else, muffled, probably by his hand

Lee Brazil

over the receiver, and a deep voice that matched the laughter purred

a response.

Val jerked upright. He’d evidently interrupted something. Shit.

He’d been stressing about Adrian asking him out, when the other man

already had a boyfriend. It really was safe to assume that they could

just hang out.

Why that left him a little disappointed, he didn’t know, but he

hurried to fill the silence on the other end of the phone. “Umm, oh,

okay. Are you free tomorrow?”

“Yeah, sure, I can do lunch tomorrow. How about going to that

Indian place by your shop?” Adrian seemed a bit impatient now.

“Fine. See you tomorrow.” Val hung up the phone, a little bereft.

How could he have been so stupid as to have believed that Adrian

was hanging around waiting for him, lusting after him and no one

else? Clearly, the other man had an active social life and he just wasn’t

as vocal about it as Val had been. That kind of pissed him off. In all the

years Val had shared his own highs and lows, talked about the men

he’d dated, would it have killed Adrian to just once or twice slip in a

word or two about his own love life?

***

The Indian Café in the same strip mall as Val’s shop was crowded

as always. Val had gone ahead and asked to be seated, because he

didn’t want to lose the opportunity for a table that had opened, but

the handsome, usually friendly young Indian waiter was giving him

the evil eye as he waved him away yet again. “I’m waiting for some-

one.” He smiled awkwardly. If that someone showed up. The enticing

exotic scents of cumin, coriander, and curry wafted about the room as

chattering voices rose and fell, mingling with the clink of silverware

on china.

Val watched the cute but irritated waiter pause to give Adrian the

once-over as he approached the table, before turning back to gather

a second menu. Unaware that he was being checked out, Adrian slid

into the chair across from him. “Hey, Val.” The charcoal-gray dress

trousers and cream-collared dress shirt complemented Adrian’s lean

physique nicely. He’d removed the tie that Val knew he wore for work,

and his hair curled a bit in the moist heat of the restaurant.

Val smiled at him. “Glad you could make it. Sorry I interrupted

your lunch yesterday. Your friend doesn’t mind you being with me?”

The Librarian

Adrian laughed and Val’s heart stopped. Oh. Now that was a sexy

sound. Fucking celibacy vow. His heart sped up as his gaze locked on

Adrian’s mouth. He swallowed. Those plump pink lips had parted

and gleaming white teeth were visible in the moist opening. He won-

dered how that laugh would taste if he leaned across the table and

kissed Adrian right now.

“Knock it off!” Adrain snapped.

“Huh?” Val jerked his gaze to Adrian’s eyes. That was safer. Not.

The blue eyes darkened and glittered with lust.

“Stop looking at me like that. You want to be friends, I understand

that and I agreed to it. That does not give you license to tease me. I

want you and you know it. Save the hot looks for someone else or you

may get more for lunch than you bargained for.”

Val drew back swiftly as though he’d been slapped. Was Adrian

teasing? It didn’t look like it, but... “Sorry. Again. I’m sorry. I didn’t

mean anything by it. You know me, I just flirt.”

Adrian nodded as though he accepted that statement at face val-

ue. Thank God. “I know you do. And I did tell you looking is free, so

don’t worry about it. I only have another forty-five minutes, so what’s

good here?”

They chatted about the possibilities inherent in the vacant shop

next door to the salon while they waited for their food, and as they ate

it. By the time the young waiter approached their table, all his earlier

impatience out of sight, Val had about made up his mind to go for it

and take the challenge. Adrian made it all seem so simple and fun,

and the promise to help with the painting and grunt work was too

good to pass up.

The waiter smiled fatuously and made eyes at Adrian in silent

flirtation while he scribbled on their check and gathered up the empty

plates. And Adrian, damn it, didn’t seem the least averse to receiving

those hot glances or even flirting back!

Val scowled. What was up with that? Who flirted with someone

in front of a date? Oh. Was it that obvious that he and Adrian weren’t

dating? Why would the waiter assume that Adrian was a free agent

when he was eating with Val? For that matter, he’d been eating here

for years and the waiter had never given him any indication that he

liked men.

It wasn’t till the waiter had cleared their plates, rather indiscreetly

slipping Adrian a scrap of paper, probably with his phone number on

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it, and Adrian made a move to leave that Val brought up the subject

he’d intended to talk about.

“Adrian, you know I think you’re totally hot, right? I don’t want

you to misunderstand my stance on dating right now. It’s not per-

sonal.”

“Fuck.” Adrian stood swiftly, looking down at Val. His slim build

and modest height seemed much more substantial from this angle.

“This again? I told you, you’re hot too. Hell. Our fucking waiter is

hot, and so’s that guy with the blonde bimbo in the corner over there.

I’m not going to suddenly leap on any of you in unfulfilled lust. Look

around you, Val. This is a college town, and it is full of hot men. Just

because you’re fixated on guys who are carbon fucking copies of that

asshole you dated freshman year doesn’t mean a thing. And there’s

something else for you to mull over before you call me again. Why

do all your boyfriends look like that prick who dumped you? You’re

thirty years old now, man. It’s time to stop dating boys and start dat-

ing men.”

Adrian stalked away and Val noted through his embarrassment

that more than one pair of interested eyes followed his progress

through the crowded room, including the aforementioned hot waiter

and the guy with the blonde bimbo in the corner, much to her evident

disgust. Close to the door, Adrian paused and looked back. “I can still

sense your gaze hot on my ass, Val. And just remember, looking may

be free, but if you want to touch, it’s going to cost you something you

may not be ready to pay.”

Fuck. He wanted to sink through the floor. Every eye in the place

had snapped from Adrian to him and they all seemed to be waiting

for some snappy comeback. He smiled weakly and shrugged. He

had nothing. His usual snark had deserted him the moment Adrian

walked into the restaurant.

The waiter gave him a pitying glance. “I’ll take him. He’s classy...

and masterful. I love that in a man.”

Val dropped his head into his hands and sighed. He was going

back to the shop and having Macy dye his hair black. It would suit

this freaky emo mood he just couldn’t shake. Wanting Adrian to want

him, wanting Adrian, and not wanting to want him, everything was

just too fucking confusing.

Chapter Seven

Fuck. He may have just blown any progress he’d made with Val

in the past week. He needed to make up some ground, and fast, or

he’d be back where he started, listening to Val rhapsodize about his

fantastic sex life and mammoth boyfriends every Friday while getting

his hair trimmed.

Why had he freaked out so much over such a stupid thing? He

fucking knew Val was leery of his intentions. He knew it, so why freak

and ram those home truths down Val’s throat? Adrian needed to back

off and let Val figure out what was going on in his head himself. The

fact that Adrian was so sure about what that was, was irrelevant. He

couldn’t say, “You’re hung up on Jake because he dumped you and

you’re dumping all these young jocks in revenge, but you really want

to be with me in an adult relationship, so get over it and let’s get it

on.” Could he? No. Val had to realize it on his own. Years of patient

waiting were not going to go to waste. He had to keep his big mouth

shut and stick to the fucking plan in the future.

Lee Brazil

As Adrian pulled his car back into the employee parking lot at

the library, he had his cell phone out and dialed the shop. He made

an appointment for Saturday morning that he knew would get Val’s

attention. He wouldn’t mention it when he went in for his Friday trim

either. Let’s see if Val had the guts to bring it up on his own.

When his phone rang that night, Adrian almost didn’t answer it.

He didn’t really want to talk to anyone but Val, and he was pretty

sure after this afternoon that Val wasn’t going to want to talk to him

anytime soon. He answered it anyway because he really didn’t have

anything better to do.

“Adrian?” Val. The suave, sexy Val he’d known for the past ten

years, not the slightly off-kilter, uncertain Val he’d been dealing with

the last week. What had happened to restore the other man’s sense of

self?

“Yeah, Val, it’s me,” he sighed. Here it came. Another story about a

hot new guy. He’d missed his chance by not being aggressive enough.

Or probably by being too aggressive this afternoon.

“I’m not gonna be able to cut your hair Friday.”

Whoa. That was new. “You’re not? Why? Is something wrong?”

Val had cut his hair every Friday for six years. Damn. He’d really

pissed the guy off.

“No, no. Nothing wrong. I have to cancel my Friday appoint-

ments because I need to do some business at the bank.”

“You’re sure you’re not mad about what I said this afternoon?”

Was Val brushing him off because he’d given himself away? Now he’d

have to forego finding out if Val knew what he had planned for Sat-

urday.

“This afternoon? No. I’ve thought about it a bit, and I have more

to do, but you might be right. My boyfriends all do bear a remarkable

resemblance to the asshole. I don’t know what that means though. I

remember everything you said, as a matter of fact. You have a lot of

great insight.” Val sighed now, and fabric rustled in the background.

“Are you in bed, Val?” Shit. Just the idea of that rustling being

soft bedsheets had his cock throbbing. What kind of sheets would the

exotic Val have? Black satin? Red?

“Yeah. It’s been a long day.” The other man’s voice was softer

now, teasing. “Are you in bed, Adrian?”

Shit. “No. I’m not.” More teasing. Well, he could take some teas-

ing if it meant Val wasn’t mad at him anymore, especially if it meant

Val was considering the things Adrian had blurted out this afternoon.

The Librarian

“Where are you, Adrian?” Val’s voice came even softer than be-

fore, a sibilant, sexy whisper that stroked across his every nerve and

prickled along his skin to come to rest like a gentle hand on his aching

cock.

“I’m on the sofa in my living room.” He stretched back, dragging

his legs onto the black leather of the sofa and laying his head against a

fluffy red cushion. “I’m too tired to head into the bedroom right now.”

“So you’re dressed?” Disappointment drenched Val’s voice, forc-

ing it up to a more normal tone.

“I am. Are you?” Please don’t be dressed, please don’t be dressed,

the hungry lover inside Adrian begged. He reached down and ad-

justed his cock with one hand as just the thought of talking to a naked

Val set his eager cock to thumping against the zipper of his trousers.

“I’m wearing flannel pajama pants,” Val confessed with slow re-

luctance, drawing the words out.

Surprised, Adrian laughed. “Flannel? How prosaic. I always pic-

tured you as more adventurous somehow.”

There was brief silence on the other end of the line. Then, “You’ve

pictured me in pajamas?” Strong, very self-assured, very self-confi-

dent, and not what Adrian wanted to hear at all.

“Oh yeah,” he answered, making sure to put a touch of sarcasm

in his tone. “But not nearly as often as I pictured you naked. What did

you expect when you were feeding me the details of your sex life all

these years?”

An uncertain silence greeted this statement. Good. He needed Val

to be uncertain, to be vulnerable.

“I need to go now. I’ll see you next week.” Val hung up before

Adrian could get in another word. Shit. He was such a manipulative

asshole.

“I’m going to hell for this, I just know it,” he told the picture of his

parents on the bookcase.

He pressed his hand against the throbbing ache in his groin, and

then with a fatalistic shrug, unzipped his trousers. He carefully pulled

his aching cock out of his pants and stroked it. He pictured Val, reclin-

ing amid black silky sheets, his pale skin glowing against the dark

fabric. His slim body would be nude, fuck the flannel pants, the pow-

dery blue hair spiked with sweat. Adrian’s breathing quickened as

the images flew through his mind. He’d stretch Val’s hands above his

head and bind them with the blue satin rope he’d purchased long ago

and saved for Val. Val would tug and writhe against his bindings.

Lee Brazil

His body tensed as he imagined Val’s voice, moaning and begging for

release, for an end to the torment of pleasure as Adrian stroked his

firmly muscled body. He’d listen patiently for a while, but he knew

he’d lose that patience eventually, because God knew Val could talk

the ear off a donkey. He’d gag the other man, and then move in for

the kill. Adrian’s tension mounted, he dug his heels into the leather

cushion and arched into his pumping fist. He’d take Val’s sweet cock

in his mouth and lick and suck until the other man was silenced by

the power of his orgasm. The vision of that beautiful face twisted as

spasms of pleasure racked Val’s body sent Adrian over the edge, and

he shuddered as cum spilled over his hand onto the fabric of his trou-

sers.

Chapter Eight

Val hung up the phone slowly and dropped it onto the blue cotton

sheet beside him. Guilt seeped into him. He’d lied to Adrian. Not just

about the hair appointment. That had been a deliberate act on his part.

When he’d returned from his lunch date with Adrian after a long walk

in the park across the street, during which his unreasonable jealousy

continued to torture him, he’d discovered that Adrian had been busy

that afternoon.

“What the fuck?” Val had pointed at an entry in the appointment

book for Saturday. “What is this, Ted?”

“Your professor? He called a few minutes ago and made an ap-

pointment for a personal wax job. Delia was free, so she said she’d

take it.”

“He did not. Is this some kind of joke? No way does Adrian Grey

wax his chest. I just saw him loosened up at lunch today, and I defi-

nitely saw hair peeking out of that shirt. Not funny, kid.”

Lee Brazil

Ted had snickered, tongue stud clicking against teeth in an annoy-

ing not-rhythm. “Well, you’re right there. He doesn’t wax his chest.

Least, that’s not the personal area he asked about,” Ted had chortled.

“No? Then what exactly does he want Delia to wax?” The sudden

rush of knowledge, the very idea that Adrian could be so...modern...

adventurous? stunned him. The words to describe the concept eluded

him. It couldn’t be. That was so not Adrian. It was ridiculous to even

contemplate. “Don’t answer that!” The hell Delia would give Adrian

a Brazilian. No way anyone else got to wax Adrian. “I’ll do it myself.

Reschedule Mrs. DeWitt, will you?”

Ted snickered again. “Sure thing, boss. Want me to block out a

few hours for you?”

Glaring at the younger man, Val stomped to his station and flicked

out his cape. He waved a young man into his seat and scowled at Ted.

“No. Just do as you’re told.”

He’d smiled in wicked delight half an hour later as he realized

he’d just been handed the perfect opportunity to get his hands on the

goods without paying a penalty. He’d have to be very careful Friday

not to let slip that he knew Adrian had scheduled an appointment for

Saturday. With any luck, he could have the whole process started be-

fore Adrian even realized that Val had replaced Delia. That was when

he’d realized that a change in the routine was called for. He’d decided

to call Adrian and reschedule the haircut. Skipping a cut wasn’t go-

ing to get Adrian fired, and breaking up the structure Adrian lived by

felt kind of good, in a way. Like he was getting some of his own back,

restoring his position of power in their relationship. Maybe he should

stop reserving that Friday morning block of time for Adrian and let

him take his chances getting an appointment like everyone else.

Typically, though, the man he knew better than himself hadn’t re-

acted to the phone call the way he expected. No protests about the dis-

rupted schedule, no disappointment that they presumably wouldn’t

be meeting. That kind of bothered him. He looked forward to cutting

Adrian’s hair. Wasn’t it the same for Adrian? Would he just go some-

where else to get his hair cut? He reached for the phone, tempted to

call and take back his words.

Instead, he dropped his hand to his thigh and stroked lightly over

the filmy, silky, blue fabric of his pajamas. This was the lie that both-

ered him. He never wore flannel. Hated it. If he bothered to wear any-

thing to sleep in, it was something like this, something soft and silky

that caressed his skin like a lover’s touch.

The Librarian

Green Day ranted in the background, and he caught the lyrics as

he lay against his pillows, absently clutching the soft blue cotton in

one hand while he traced patterns on the silky fabric of his pajamas

with the other, soothing rather than arousing.

“When masturbation’s lost its thrill, you’re fucking lazy...”

Was he? Had it? If he tried harder, could he and Derek still be

together now? He shook his head. Nope. Not fucking likely. Derek

fucking bored him. He had to work way too hard at being involved in

sex with Derek, and what was the point of that? If Derek didn’t turn

him on, he didn’t turn Derek on. The Dereks of his past had come

and gone, easily replaced when he grew bored with one of them. As

Adrian had so bluntly pointed out, this town was full of hot, athletic

college boys, and Val had dated his share of them. But...

The most thrill he’d gotten in weeks was from hearing Adrian’s

voice, seeing his smile. Maybe... He closed his eyes and pictured Adri-

an as he’d been on Saturday. Sexy. Tight faded Levis, gorgeous eyes...

yeah. That helped. Val rubbed his stirring cock through the filmy blue

fabric, wondering again at the sensations Adrian’s touch would cre-

ate. Would he be tender and gentle? Rough and urgent? Would he be

tentative in his grasp on Val’s cock? Would his hand move slowly like

it had that time they’d hooked up freshman year? Adrian had kissed

him then, but his mouth had been hesitant, unsure. He’d followed

where Val led, had accepted what was offered, but he hadn’t had the

strength of will to take, and Val wanted badly to be taken. Fucking

with Adrian then had been sweet, fumbling, but vaguely unsatisfying.

Though both of them had achieved orgasm, neither had been alto-

gether happy about the way things had gone. Val had decided that he

and Adrian were too much alike and turned his sights to a different

type of playmate.

But now, now thoughts of Adrian had his cock hard, his balls

drawing tight to his body, and he pushed his pajamas down to touch

bare flesh. Adrian today radiated self-confidence. He wouldn’t be hes-

itant in his touch; he’d take Val’s cock in his hand and squeeze it ex-

actly right. His hand and Adrian’s mingled in his mind as he gasped.

He stroked himself with long, hard strokes, and then reached down to

cup and squeeze his balls with his other hand. Val groaned in pleasure

at the images of Adrian flashing through his mind. He stiffened and

thrust his throbbing cock through his own fist. Reaching down with

the middle finger of the hand that cupped his balls, he rubbed gently

Lee Brazil

at the tender flesh of his hole. He gave a low, harsh cry as he spilled,

seed erupting in long, hot spurts along his belly.

He lay panting for a few guilty minutes before wiping his sticky

hand and belly with the edge of the blue cotton sheet. No sense ruin-

ing his pajamas. He fell asleep to dream about Adrian while wonder-

ing what this strange new obsession might mean.

Chapter Nine

Saturday finally arrived and Val almost had second thoughts

about the stunt he was planning. He knew that Adrian would not ap-

preciate it, but he couldn’t resist stealing the opportunity. It seemed

like the perfect chance to get an intimate look at Adrian. He set up the

waxing room and arranged for Ted to show Adrian into it and prep

him for the wax job, and then carefully hid out of sight in his office

until Ted came to let him know it was time for the show to start.

He’d worn his black paint-spattered Converse sneakers so his

footsteps would be indistinguishable from anyone else’s as he moved

down the short, dingy corridor to the waxing room. Talk about para-

noid. Just because he recognized the tread of Adrian’s Florsheims on

his linoleum didn’t mean Adrian would be able to distinguish his own

booted footsteps.

Though he thought he’d been prepared for the sight that would

meet his eyes, he discovered that he was wrong.

Lee Brazil

Holy hell, was he wrong. Adrian stretched out in a reclined chair,

his jeans removed. His sleekly muscled flesh was bared from the na-

vel. Fuck, the man had a lot of secrets hidden under those suits! At

some time in the last ten years, Adrian had had his navel pierced,

and a thin silver ring about a half-inch in diameter lay flat against the

firm flesh. The area he wanted waxed was covered with a very short

stubble of black hair, and it was a very appealing sight. Val reached

out, most unprofessionally, to see if the stubble was as soft and silky

to the touch as the hair on Adrian’s head. The urge to pet came from

somewhere deep in the past he’d put behind him.

A stirring and thickening under Val’s intent gaze lured him clos-

er, and he moved closer to the chair. He reached out a fascinated hand

to adjust the drapery that covered the rest of the man’s body when

Adrian spoke.

“So, you do the waxing too?” Val jerked his gaze up to meet the

twinkling blue eyes, and nearly stammered his answer.

“It’s my shop. I know how to perform every service we offer here.”

Like hell he was letting anyone else touch Adrian in his most private

areas, whether he had a right to the proprietary jealousy or not!

“Well, as long as you know what you’re doing, have at it.” The

other man seemed amused as he gestured to his unprotected, now

visible groin.

Exercising extreme caution, Val did his best to complete the task

in a pain-free manner. He cringed in sympathy when applying the

wax, though he’d tested it carefully on the sensitive skin of his own in-

ner wrist several times before deeming it cool enough not to burn and

warm enough to do the job. He winced in sympathy when pulling the

strips from the sensitive skin, despite Adrian’s stoic silence.

In his determination to avoid hurting Adrian, he forgot his inten-

tion of ogling and handling the goods, and focused instead on making

the experience as painless as possible.

He breathed an audible sigh of relief when he removed the last of

the hair and said, “There. Done.”

He raised his gaze from the slightly reddened but now smooth

flesh. “That wasn’t too bad, was it?”

Adrian shrugged. “I’m used to it. I’ve been doing it once a month

for about eight years. Guess I’ll be coming here to have it done now.

The shop I used to visit closed last month.”

The Librarian

He rose from the chair and carefully drew his soft, black cotton,

boxer briefs up. Then he donned his faded blue jeans and stared at

Val.

Val met that gaze confidently at first, then lowered his eyes and

looked away.

When Adrian spoke his voice was hard, uncompromising. “You

touched me. You came in here deliberately intending to cheat on our

bargain. I warned you that wasn’t free, and the price will be a steep

one. I’ll collect it soon.”

With those words, he turned and left the shop. Val trembled in

stunned disbelief in the waxing room, listening to the indistinguish-

able murmur of Adrian talking to Ted at the counter. By the time

he’d come to terms with the fact that Adrian knew he’d deliberately

schemed to touch him, the other man had left the shop.

This was not the Adrian he remembered. That much was certain.

This Adrian, as the waiter had said, was masterful, commanding. The

idea of being at this Adrian’s mercy sparked fantasies Val had put to

bed nearly a decade ago.

Chapter Ten

Val was getting frantic. He hadn’t known what to do about his

blunder on the wax job. Somehow, he’d changed things between him-

self and Adrian that he wasn’t sure he wanted changed. At the same

time, he had glimpsed a side of Adrian’s character that had him near-

ly enthralled. He kept remembering that hard, commanding tone of

voice telling him he wasn’t getting away with anything. Adrian had

sounded so strong and in control, just the memory brought the warm

rush of passion to his body. If he’d found Adrian sexy before, now he

was dying to rediscover what the other man was like in bed. Fucking

vow of celibacy be damned.

Maybe he needed to get out and head around to some of his old

haunts. Meet some new people, talk to other men and have a good

time. He wasn’t looking for a hookup, but he needed to do something

besides work, brood about Adrian, go home, brood about his direc-

tionless life and Adrian, and then sleep and dream about Adrian fuck-

The Librarian

ing him. A quick call had Ted picking him up so they could head out

to a few of the local hotspots.

They had been sitting at a table in a crowded bar that catered to a

wide range of clientele which consisted primarily of college students

when Ted’s roaming eye froze on someone in the corner.

“Wow. Your professor’s here. Who’d have guessed?” Ted’s wry

comment had Val’s eyes searching the bar for Adrian before he could

stop himself.

“Where? And I told you, he’s a librarian.” Not waiting for Ted’s

direction, Val scanned the room again, and located Adrian seated at a

distant table. His stunned gaze locked on to the two other men at the

table. One was a large, muscular man who might have appealed to Val

a month ago before vows of celibacy had opened his eyes to Adrian’s

appeal in a new way. The other was a delicately built, wide-eyed, waif

type who seemed to be off in a world of his own, with his pale violet

hair and matching lipstick. Definitely not the type to have ever been

of interest to Val, except from a professional standpoint. That hair was

a lovely shade of purple.

But Adrian...Adrian was...not Adrian as Val had ever seen him.

Dark. Bold. Confident. Sexy as hell and attracting the eyes of every

man of a certain stamp in the building. He’d forgone the glasses and

the button-down shirt in favor of a black T-shirt and faded 501s that

clung and showed off every muscle. His body radiated a dark allure

that his commanding voice in the waxing room had hinted at. Adrian

at play and Adrian at work were clearly two different people. And Val

knew which one he preferred.

He rose mechanically, not knowing what he was going to say, but

knowing he needed to approach this new Adrian before he missed

his chance. He left Ted sputtering at the table behind him and walked

across to Adrian’s table. Adrian didn’t stop talking to the muscular

blond guy, the purple-haired guy didn’t stop daydreaming, and the

muscular guy paid Val no attention at all. Val stood awkwardly for

a moment, waiting for someone, anyone, to acknowledge his pres-

ence, but none of the three men paid him any heed. He backed slightly

away in embarrassment, stopping as a hard grip locked around his

wrist. Adrian didn’t look at him, didn’t stop his conversation with the

blond guy, but kicked out a chair from the table with a leather-booted

foot and tugged him into it. Val sank into the chair, angled slightly

away from the table, which put him in a sort of sub-seating arrange-

ment with the younger guy. Jesus. They must look a freaking sight,

Lee Brazil

him with his blue hair, the purple-haired guy, and the other two. He

turned in his chair to address Adrian, but the grip on his wrist tight-

ened and Adrian shook his arm just a bit in negation. Val turned back

to find the waif studying him.

“I’m Ashe,” he offered, in a wispy voice that matched his appear-

ance.

“Val. So, I haven’t seen you here before.” If Adrian was going to

ignore him, he could at least entertain himself with this pretty boy.

Ashe flicked a look at the blond from the corner of his eye. What-

ever he saw must have encouraged him, because he offered an answer

in a slightly louder voice than before that Val didn’t have to strain to

hear. “We haven’t been here before. Phil came to meet Mr. Adrian.”

Val responded absently, asking random questions about where

the kid had had his dye job done, what did he do for a living, and nod-

ded inattentively when the kid answered. He caught Ted’s eye across

the room as Ted rose from the table they’d been seated at and waved

toward the door. He tilted his head in acknowledgment of Ted’s de-

sire to leave and returned his attention to the boy’s whispered con-

versation.

Distracted by a change in the hand grasping his wrist, Val jerked.

Adrian no longer grasped him tightly. His touch had transformed to

a caress, thumb sliding gently in tiny circles over Val’s inner wrist.

Did Adrian even know what he was doing? The turmoil of emotion

lessened somewhat, and Val relaxed slightly. Somehow, he’d earned

some approval from Adrian, and the caress enticed his senses, focus-

ing them on that one spot where his skin grew more sensitive. He

didn’t really care what he’d done to deserve it; he just enjoyed it.

Adrian still hadn’t stopped talking, hadn’t looked at Val, made no ac-

knowledgment of his presence beyond the slow circles of that thumb,

sensitizing his skin, sending prickles of awareness throughout Val’s

body, creating a burning desire to experience that rough caress on

other parts of his body.

And what the fuck was up with Adrian not talking to him? The

more time passed, the more pissed he got. Fuck, he should leave while

he had a chance of catching up with Ted in the parking lot. Val started

to shift and push up from his seat, but the caress turned to a harsh grip

again and one word flew in his direction from the owner of that hand.

“Stay.”

He subsided, fuming a bit. Stay. What the fuck? He was a fucking

dog now? Sit. Stay. And the sit hadn’t even been verbalized!

The Librarian

“You shouldn’t interrupt them,” Ashe whispered again. He

glanced at the blond, and seemed to cringe slightly when he realized

the other man had turned his attention to them instead of Adrian.

Dismayed that he might have somehow caused trouble for Ashe,

Val turned his gaze back to find Adrian watching him. There was a bit

of censure in those deep blue eyes, and a hint of embarrassed shame

tried to creep its way into Val’s consciousness.

“What brings you here tonight, Val?” There was a knowing, dis-

approving sneer on Adrian’s face.

What? Did he think that Val was trolling for guys? “Not that! I

told you, I’ve taken a vow of celibacy—”

His explanation was cut off by a disbelieving snort from across

the table. He broke away from Adrian’s gaze to meet the blond guy’s

incredulous expression. “What? Do I even fucking know you?”

“Val,” Adrian’s controlled voice broke into his own overly emo-

tional response. “This is Phil, Ashe’s partner, my friend and coworker.

Phil, this is Val, the friend I told you about.”

Phil cast him an unfriendly glance. “Ashe and I need to hit the

road, Adrian. Val.”

He and Adrian watched the other couple leave, Ashe a hairs-

breadth behind Phil, looking back over his shoulder once to give Val

a farewell glance.

Val turned to find Adrian watching him again. “Is he going to be

all right? What the hell is he going to do to that kid?”

Adrian raised a quizzical brow. “Do you care? He’s not going to

hurt him. They’ve been together for quite a while.”

Val mulled that over briefly, but as always, his thoughts returned

to the man in front of him. “What the fuck is up with you tonight,

Adrian? I came over here to say hello, and you shove me into a chair

and ignore me.”

“That’s not what you came over for.” Adrian’s lips firmed into

a thin line. “I know why you came over here, and after your bitchy

behavior, I’m not much in the mood to give you what you came for.

Who’d you come here with? Is he expecting you to leave with him?”

“I came with Ted. He left a while ago with someone else.” The lie

slipped so easily from his lips, Val fought to keep from cringing, shift-

ing restlessly under Adrian’s steady gaze.

Anger flashed in blue eyes, swiftly hidden before Val could ana-

lyze it. “So, you came trolling and now you need a ride home?”

Lee Brazil

Exasperated, Val blurted forcefully, “I did not come trolling. I

came to get out of my apartment and stop thinking about you! And

then, here you fucking were...looking like that...and...” His voice

slowly trailed away as the realization of what he’d said sank in.

Chapter Eleven

He didn’t have long to worry about it either, because Adrian’s

mouth came down on his in a kiss so abrupt, so sensual and com-

manding, that he automatically opened his mouth and allowed Adri-

an whatever liberties he desired. Heat swept through him, and he

leaned into the kiss, raising his hands to clutch at the hard muscles of

Adrian’s shoulders, outlined by the tight, black T-shirt. His fingers ex-

plored the hard muscles normally hidden under sedate button-down

shirts, and his tongue tangled desperately with the hot intruder fuck-

ing his mouth. Jesus. Adrian kissed like no one he’d ever met. Had he

been like this freshman year? No fucking way had Adrian kissed him

like this when they were nineteen and he had let him get away.

When Adrian pulled away from the kiss, Val protested, vows of

celibacy be damned. His cock ached. His whole body hungered for

more.

“Not here, Val. Come on.”

Lee Brazil

Blindly, he rose and followed as Adrian led him away from the

table. The snick of the lock on the bathroom door barely invaded his

consciousness; relief filled him as Adrian pushed him back against the

closed door and captured his lips again.

The devouring kiss occupied his thoughts almost exclusively, but

some exultant spirit in the back of his mind noted the nimble fingers

deftly unfastening the button and zip closure of his leather pants. The

briefest caress of cold air on his exposed cock followed. He groaned

when Adrian’s hand closed tightly around his cock and squeezed.

He mumbled in protest when Adrian withdrew from the kiss, but

moaned again in approval as he realized what path those wandering

lips were taking. The descent to his eager cock may have been a little

more rapid than he would have liked, with none of the detours and

side trips along the way that he usually enjoyed, but this was a public

bathroom in a busy bar on a Saturday night, after all, and haste had to

play a part in their activities.

“Shhh. I know what you need.” Adrian’s hot breath blew in a

sweet caress over his heated flesh, and he struggled to push toward

that warmth, filled with the urgent need to bathe his cock in the heat of

Adrian’s warm mouth, to revel in that demanding touch on his flesh.

A hand came down hard on his hip, pinning him in place against the

locked door. The thumb that had caressed his inner wrist now began

its circling on the sensitive skin over his hip bone.

Trembling with eagerness, he waited impatiently for something

more, some escalation of touch or taste.

“You touched me this morning. After I warned you touching isn’t

free. Now you’ll have to pay the price.”

Val gasped in surprise. “And you’re the man to make me pay? To

give me what I need?” Oh fuck, he hoped so.

“I’ve waited years to give you what you need, baby, and I know I

can do it, right here, right now. But you need to know, this isn’t going

to be a one-time deal, not a fuck-and-run situation. That’s the price. If

we do this, you’re mine.”

Val wished he had the strength of mind to pull away, to tell Adri-

an to fuck off. He wasn’t his type, but he was. He might not boast the

physical strength that had attracted Val to all his previous lovers, but

he had the habit of command, the aura of authority that unraveled

the uncertainties in Val’s mind and urged him to give in, to follow

and revel in sensation. Being with Adrian was safe, almost comfort-

ing. Adrian wouldn’t leave, wouldn’t cheat, and wouldn’t hurt him.

The Librarian

He mumbled his assent and threaded his fingers through the silky

hair he meticulously trimmed every Friday morning, trying to urge

Adrian to take his cock in his mouth, ready to beg, plead, or whatever

the other man required to get those lips wrapped around him.

“I didn’t get that.” Adrian’s voice cut through the fog of passion,

and Val whimpered, struggling to push forward.

Everything became clear to Val in that moment. Yes, he belonged

with Adrian. And he wanted this and nothing else mattered. He set-

tled back, accepting that he would get whatever Adrian chose to give

him, and waited.

Adrian drew back and pulled something Val couldn’t see from his

pocket. Moments later the rough drag of leather on the sensitive flesh

of his balls got his attention. He looked down to see Adrian secur-

ing a leather cock and ball harness under his balls with a dull snap,

then moving on to fasten three more snaps, one above Val’s balls, one

around the base of his aching cock, and a final one that fit neatly be-

tween his balls, so that they were drawn up and split apart in a lush

display.

Adrian finished his ministrations with a single press of his open

mouth on the tip of the cock he had packaged so neatly. “You look

beautiful, Val. Now zip up and let’s get you home.” He rose smoothly

to his feet, but Val noticed that he adjusted himself behind the buttons

of those 501s as he did so.

His hands moved of their own accord to obey Adrian’s instruc-

tions as he studied his old friend. Adrian had matured a lot since

freshman year. Had the seedlings of command been present then and

Val had failed to appreciate them? He had no doubt any longer that

the Adrian of today could give him what he wanted, needed, in the

bedroom or out.

He opened his mouth to say as much, but Adrian shushed him

with a finger across his damp lips. “No. I’m dropping you off at your

place, where you are going to think about this. You’re going to put on

those flannel pajamas, and you’re going to sleep on it. Let the idea of

belonging together pervade your every thought, as it has mine for the

past ten years.”

Val found himself nodding, accepting. They did belong together,

didn’t they? “But...”

Adrian nodded, sliding his hand down Val’s silk T-shirt to the

straining fly of his Levis. “Leave it on. When it’s time, I’ll take it off

myself. Let it remind you of what could be.”

Lee Brazil

Flannel? Put on flannel pajamas? “I don’t have any flannel paja-

mas.” The words were out before he could remember his lie.

Adrian’s expression stilled. “You don’t?”

The blankness of that expression, that voice, reminded Val of a

night long ago, when he’d lain at the foot of Adrian’s dorm bed, rat-

tling on about a man he’d just met, someone he’d imagined could give

him what Adrian hadn’t, and he remembered again why he never

lied. He sucked at lying, but even worse, he sucked at remembering

the lies he’d told.

He’d gone out that day, furious and hurt that Adrian had put his

statistics test ahead of Val’s wants, and convinced that Adrian didn’t

really care for him, that he was a convenient outlet for the studious

boy who spent way too much time with his books. Val had wanted

someone then who would put him first, go to parties with him, and

take advantage of all the social activities that college had to offer. That

foolish anger had led him to foolish actions, and he’d found himself

lying through his teeth to a stoic Adrian about a wonderful man he’d

met. What he’d hoped Adrian would do then, he hadn’t even known.

He just knew that the reaction he’d gotten hadn’t been the one he

wanted, that instead of ending the day in Adrian’s arms, he’d ended a

relationship that he hadn’t really realized how much he wanted until

it was too late. Then, as now, he’d ruined any chance of a relation-

ship with Adrian. And he’d known even as he spoke that doors were

closing, and choices had been made that couldn’t be taken back. How

could he have thought he could pry that door open again ten years

after slamming it shut?

Chapter Twelve

Drained and emotionally exhausted, Adrian dropped a contem-

plative, reticent Val off in front of his apartment building. He won-

dered if there was any point in trying to carry this thing further. He’d

succeeded in attracting Val’s interest, even if it meant exaggerating

aspects of his personality, and yet the closer he got to Val physically,

the greater the emotional distance between them seemed.

Why the hell would anyone lie about something so simple as

what kind of pajamas they wore? What the fuck purpose did that

serve? Val’s lie had stolen his fantasies, the only thing he’d had for the

past ten years. Fantasies of what Val would look like, what sex would

be like, every man he’d fucked, every pair of lips he’d kissed had been

fuel for those fantasies, and didn’t he sound like a fucking stalker?

Lovely. Time to cut off this obsession. Move the fuck on.

What other lies had he believed over the years? He uncharacteris-

tically parked on the street in front of his house instead of pulling into

the covered driveway. No need to worry about snow accumulation

Lee Brazil

this late in the spring anyway. Slamming the door of the gray Acura,

he stalked heavily to the front door. A glance to the left showed him

the only lights on at Phil’s place were the ones in the basement. The

rest of the house was dim, so he couldn’t very well go over and let off

steam to his friend.

His own basement hadn’t seen the lights on in ages, and after this

evening, he wasn’t sure that was going to change anytime soon. Not

that it mattered much. His playroom was just that, a place to play

when the mood struck. He didn’t live the lifestyle like Phil and Ashe

did, though he could if Val were into it. Adrian crossed the thresh-

old, picking up the mail from the hall table where he’d dropped it

earlier. The stack contained several letters he’d considered dropping

unopened into the trash earlier today. Now, he might need that place

in a PhD program after all. He toed off his black leather boots and

pushed them back neatly under the rack of coat hooks on the wall op-

posite the table.

Adrian settled into the leather sofa, loving the comfortable way

the furniture shifted as he did, stretching his legs to rest one bare foot

across the other on the coffee table, and slit the first envelope open

with his thumbnail. The rejection surprisingly didn’t bother him. He

tossed the envelope and letter onto the glass coffee table and slit the

next one. Acceptance. This combined with the offer his supervisor at

the library had made him earlier in the week gave him all the choices

he needed. The rest depended on Val.

The gall of being lied to faded as he contemplated the man he’d

loved for so long. If Val could see in himself what Adrian saw, he’d see

how alike they were. Despite teasing Adrian continuously about his

aversion to change, Val himself clung to the habits and the trappings

of the past with a tenacity that Adrian had to admire even as he fought

its effects. He kept his hair the same powdery blue he’d adopted as a

teenager, hadn’t changed so much as a chair at his shop, and insisted

on dating the same stupid jocks. And despite what Phil would surely

label as faults in Val’s character, Adrian loved Val for the sheer fact of

who he was and the simple joy being with Val gave him. So he wanted

to be loved, who didn’t? Knowing the rejection Val had faced from

his wealthy parents when they’d discovered his sexuality, on top of

the benign neglect they’d subjected their youngest offspring to before

that, Adrian could completely understand Val’s selfishness. He could

only hope for the chance to indulge and spoil Val into being more

secure and confident.

The Librarian

The chime of the doorbell interrupted his reverent daydream of

Val in the men’s room at Jake’s. Reluctantly he pushed the memory

of the hottest thing he’d ever laid eyes on to the back of his head and

headed to the door. Most likely it was Phil coming over in his sweats

to see what had happened after he left.

He peered through the front window. It wasn’t Phil. Adrian jerk-

ed the door open. “What are you doing here?” he demanded, grip-

ping the door tightly. He hadn’t even been aware Val knew where he

lived. Val’s presence here couldn’t be good.

Val pushed forward, pale blue hair mussed, eyes sparkling. With-

out a word, he grabbed Adrian’s head and leaned into him with the

full weight of his body. Their lips met in a fiery kiss that triggered a re-

sponse Adrian had controlled earlier. With a groan, his hands closed

around Val’s slim hips and he pulled Val to rest directly against him,

kicking the door shut with one bare foot.

Val broke away from the kiss briefly, tilting his head down to rest

his forehead against Adrian’s chin. “I came to tell you what I decided.”

Heart beating hard, Adrian stiffened and pulled back slightly. His

nostrils flared and he forced his breath even. “I told you to think about

it overnight and make your decision with a clear head.”

Val shook his head, impatience gleaming in his blue eyes. He

reached into the pocket of the black wool jacket he wore over what

appeared to be pajama pants and pulled something out, holding his

hand out to Adrian. “I don’t need to think about it.”

Adrian glanced at the open hand and his rapidly beating heart

came to a standstill. “You took it off.” Fuck. He could give notice to-

morrow at the library and head to Boston in two weeks, find an apart-

ment. He had enough in savings to make it until classes started in the

fall.

“Yeah. I don’t want this.”

He nodded silently. Nothing to say. Val didn’t want him. He

could call the other man a liar, or a coward, but the bottom line was

he couldn’t force a relationship with Val now any more than he could

ten years ago.

“I mean it.”

“I got that. Why are you hanging around then? And hey, what the

fuck was that kiss all about, if you don’t want me?” Couldn’t keep the

anger in this time. Years ago he had, but this time...maybe his hope

had been stronger.

Lee Brazil

Val’s impatience gave way to confusion followed by a superior

smirk. “Adrian. I want you. I just don’t want this.” He tossed the cock

harness onto the small mahogany side table Adrian had picked his

mail up from earlier. “I’ve wanted you since we were in that dorm to-

gether. What I don’t want is the whole subservient lifestyle that thing

implies. I am not your Ashe, and you are not my Phil. We’re just two

people in love, equals.”

“Really?” Right. He studied Val closely. He seemed sincere.

Could Adrian trust that he wasn’t just the man of the moment? “What

if that’s the only way I can be? What if it’s what I want? What I need?

Do you love me enough for that?”

Val’s contemplative stare nearly caused him to back down. Was

he crazy? Ten years he’d been waiting to hear these words from this

exact man, and he had to question it? He could live without a D/s

lifestyle if it meant he could have Val. It was something he’d explored

because of Val in the first place.

Val nodded, stepping forward to lean against Adrian again. “If

you need to live like that, then we can talk about it. And maybe give

it a shot. On a trial basis or something. But I’m an adult. I’ve lived my

life according to my rules for ten years. I don’t need someone to tell

me what to do or how to do it, and I certainly don’t need someone to

tell me when to come and when to hold back.” Smirking, he tugged

Adrian’s mouth back to his and very skillfully proved his point.

Adrian managed to separate their wet mouths a scant inch before

whispering back. “I can live with that.”

Sweeping his questing tongue into the warm, slick wetness of

Val’s mouth, Adrian edged them skillfully backward. Without paus-

ing, he worked his way to the living room sofa where he’d been seated

moments before, tugging Val down with him into the smooth leather.

Slowly he lay back until his head rested on the fluffy red cushion and

Val lay directly on top of him.

He threaded his hand through the silky blue hairs, marveling at

the familiarity of the textures and tastes of Val, and thrilling as though

with new discovery at the differences that the years had brought. He

struggled for control. Fumbling now might send Val away once more,

and no way could he handle letting his lover go again. Every action

and caress should show his finely honed skills.

He maintained the kiss until he had gained enough control to

move on, stroking his hands over the sleek lines of back and buttocks,

firm sure movements designed to arouse. His hands slipped beneath

The Librarian

Val’s white T-shirt, and he traced the warmth of smooth skin, follow-

ing the lines of muscle upward, and then toying with the bumps of

backbone on the way back down.

Smoothly, he rolled them until Val was pressed to the cushions

beneath him and lifted the T-shirt, pausing to stare in wonder at the

chest revealed. Creamy white skin, just a smattering of white-blond

hair, no more than he’d had when they were nineteen, lean, flat belly,

not an ounce of fat or bulging muscle. Pink nipples peaked eagerly

on his chest, and Adrian licked his lips, lowering his head to take first

one and then the other between his lips, flicking the little nubs with

his tongue before biting down gently with his teeth. Beneath him, Val

arched and moaned in pleasure, the tiny sounds stroking along Adri-

an’s nerve endings like an intimate caress. Moving his mouth from

nipple to nipple, he pushed down the pajama pants Val wore, pausing

to rub his hand sensuously across the silky fabric where it clung to

Val’s straining erection. “Mmm,” he mumbled in approval, using the

material to stroke Val. “This is much, much nicer than flannel.”

But still in the way. Trailing his tongue down the center of Val’s

chest, he pushed the pants down and off. Finding himself at last eye

to eye, as it were, with Val’s swollen cock, he breathed in deeply and

then exhaled in a slow, steady stream of breath across the moistening

tip, as much in a bid for reinforcing his own self-control as to stimu-

late Val.

Chapter Thirteen

“I’ve been having fantasies about this moment for years.”

Val heard the whispered words through the rush of blood in his

ears and thrust up, wanting the incredible heat of Adrian’s mouth on

him again. Somehow, this moment had been in his mind for years too,

a fuzzy memory now more sharply focused.

The sensation of Adrian’s hand curling around the skin and mus-

cle of his ass wrenched a whimper from deep inside, the sound re-

peated as the flick of a warm, moist tongue came against the head of

his cock. The hard ridge of Adrian’s erection grinding slowly against

his leg was a sensual invitation he wanted to accept, but Adrian ap-

peared to be in command mode, refusing to budge.

Val reached for any part of Adrian he could find, his hands grip-

ping the T-shirt his lover wore and tugging at it, attempting to get to

the flesh beneath. Giving up when Adrian proved uncooperative, he

stroked his hands underneath it, learning and relishing the strength

and texture of the muscles he’d seen during the wax job.

The Librarian

Adrian groaned in pleasure when Val scraped his nails over a

tight nipple. Val moaned in response to the sexy sound. “I want to

touch more of you. I want to taste you...”

His words cut off as a hand wrapped around the thick base of his

shaft and he was engulfed in warm, moist, sucking heat as Adrian

took him into his mouth.

“Shit! Oh, Adrian...” The whispered entreaty issued more like a

prayer. His fingers jerked from their task and clenched abruptly in

Adrian’s black hair, causing a muffled chuckle. His eyes closed and

his back arched as he tried to bury more of his length in that moist

heat.

The tingle in his spine told him this wouldn’t last long, and for

the first time in years, Val had no inclination to impress a lover with

his stamina and prowess. He wanted to come, and come now. His

fingers flexed against Adrian’s scalp as he urged him to take more, to

suck him harder. Adrian’s hungry mouth devouring him as though

he were the only thing in the world at this moment soothed a hurt that

lingered from long ago.

He cursed aloud in protest as Adrian pulled back, releasing him

again to lick over and around the crown of his stiff cock, then delve

into the slit, lapping at the drops of precum that welled there. His

tongue fluttered against the sensitive sweet spot before his mouth ab-

sorbed the length again.

One hand cupped and rolled Val’s balls, darting away to squeeze

his buttocks, and then probe gently at the tender opening hidden

there. Grunting and moaning, Val begged to come. “Please...” he

whimpered.

God, for no one else would he have begged.

As Adrian settled into a resolute rhythm, his intention clear, Val’s

body began to quake and fiery heat spread from his spine through

his groin. His muscles locked, and a ragged groan escaped, as dizzy-

ing waves of pleasure pulsed through him. Adrian seemed suddenly

content to allow Val his way, moving in response to Val’s suddenly

pumping hips, letting Val’s fingers on his scalp guide the movements

of his head. Eagerly, Val accepted the offer of control, racing toward

release. In a sudden rush, stream after stream of cum surged from his

prick into Adrian’s eager mouth, to be savored and swallowed.

After a few moments of reveling in the moment, Val’s fingers

loosened their death grip on Adrian’s hair, and gently began stroking

Lee Brazil

through the locks. Finding his voice again, he cleared his throat. “I

hear,” he hinted, “that if you swallow on a first date, it’s true love.”

Adrian sat up, pulling away and pushing his hair behind his ears.

“Is this a first date?”

“Are you asking me out?”

“Isn’t it a little late for asking? Do you often show up on a man’s

doorstep at one in the morning for a first date?”

Val smiled. “We are beyond dating already, Adrian. And you

know it. Show me your bedroom. The rest of the house can wait.”

Adrian stood in a single graceful movement. The location of the

coffee table made a similar grace on Val’s part impossible, but he

didn’t mind Adrian seeing him as less than perfect. The man knew

all his faults and apparently loved him anyway...though despite the

rather demanding hint Val had just given, he hadn’t said as much.

Predictably, he knocked a stack of papers off the table as he stood.

Stooping, he picked them up and caught the words on the first page

as he returned them to the table. What the fuck? He jerked back from

Adrian’s hand as the other man reached to take the letters. Quickly

he scanned the top letter. It was an acceptance letter from a university

PhD program in...Boston?

He froze. His mind seized up and he couldn’t focus. His heart

stopped beating for a long moment. Then it started again and every

pulse was a pain he’d have died rather than live through. “What the

hell is this, Adrian?”

Adrian’s face went blank and he calmly took the letter from Val’s

hand. “It’s an acceptance letter for the Doctoral program in Library

Sciences at Boston University.”

“I might have known. Fuck you, Adrian. What the hell is all this

about to you anyway? Do you just enjoy jerking me around or some-

thing?”

Val stiffened and pulled away as Adrian’s arms closed around

him. He pushed Adrian back, refusing the embrace. “When were you

going to tell me you were leaving? Huh? Or were you just going to

send me a postcard when you got to Boston?”

Adrian’s cheeks flushed and his eyes sparkled, and Val hated him-

self as much as Adrian for finding the other man sexy in this moment.

The heart he’d been carefully guarding from Adrian for ten years was

in danger of being broken again, and he had no business lusting after

the only man who’d ever affected him this strongly.

The Librarian

Adrian’s reasonable tone of voice pissed him off even more. “It’s

just an acceptance letter, Val. Not a final commitment on my part.

What makes you think I’d leave without you?”

“Well, I’ve just signed the lease on the shop next to mine, at your

encouragement, I might add. And if you couldn’t put me ahead of a

damned statistics test, I’m hardly going to be more important to you

and your ambition than a place in a PhD program!”

The shock on Adrian’s face was real. The calm fled to be replaced

by a simmering rage that Val had never seen before.

“Are you by chance referring to ten years ago?” Adrian’s voice

could have frozen lava.

Guilt surged through Val. He’d known even when he said it that

their near-affair would be a hot topic.

“Because I’ve no idea what you’re talking about.” Adrian drew in

a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “Perhaps now isn’t the time to see

the bedroom. Maybe, for a change, we should talk.”

“What do you mean by that? For a change? We talk all the time.”

Though, Val admitted silently, not about the really important things.

“No, we don’t. You talk and I listen, as a general rule. Or, occa-

sionally, if I get in first and talk loud enough, you listen while I talk.”

Okay. He could maybe agree that Adrian had their interactions

sorted correctly. But that was only because he’d been spending ten

years trying to protect himself from this exact moment. The moment

when Adrian told him he didn’t love him and was leaving...

Chapter Fourteen

Time to clear the air. This moment had been a long time coming as

far as Adrian was concerned. “You said I put the statistics test ahead

of you. As I remember it, you went out for the day while I was study-

ing and came back gushing about some new guy.”

Val flushed and looked away. “I wanted you to go with me. You

wouldn’t come because you had the test. I was upset. It seemed like

you didn’t want to be seen with me. I did meet someone, and things

went a little too far. I was hurt...”

Understanding dawned. “And then you couldn’t admit you’d

done something dumb so you made the best of it.”

“I could see it in your face that you knew what had happened...

and I was a coward. I should have told you I regretted it and that I

wanted to be with you, but I just...couldn’t do it.” Val’s sorrow was

real by the expression on his face.

“You mean you couldn’t believe that I would put you first. That’s

the real truth, isn’t it? You wanted me to drop everything and be at

The Librarian

your beck and call, the same as with every guy over the years.” He

knew that was oversimplifying, but it was the core of Val’s nature. He

guided the other man back to sit on the sofa, keeping his hand in a

firm grip and using the other to turn Val’s face so he could look deep

into those blue eyes, wet now with tears.

“I’ve never been first, Adrian. All my life I’ve been an afterthought.

I always thought that when I fell in love, that person would put me

first. My parents had two children in college when I came along. I was

so much an afterthought on their part, they actually left me in a gas

station in the middle of Oklahoma once when I was ten, and forgot to

come back for three hours. Maybe it’s selfish, okay, I know it’s selfish,

but I don’t want to be the second or third most important thing in

someone’s life. I want to be the first thing on my lover’s mind in the

morning and the last thing he’s conscious of at night. I want to be his

dreams, and the puzzle piece he builds his life around.”

Heart aching in sympathy, Adrian leaned forward to press his lips

against Val’s pale forehead. He wiped hot tears from the smooth skin

of Val’s cheeks with his thumbs as he cupped the other man’s jaw in

his hands. “Val. You are those things for me. For over ten years, you

have been my first thought in the morning, my last at night. Dreams

of you have kept me sane, and given me hope over the years that we

could be together.”

“But you were going to leave me. And you encouraged me to sign

the lease...you had to know I couldn’t go with you after that.” Val’s

lips trembled, and Adrian couldn’t resist pressing a kiss to the salty

dampness.

It would be so easy to get carried away with the passion of the

moment, but he needed to make sure Val understood. “Val, my career

is important to me, you know that.” He pressed a finger to Val’s lips as

they opened to speak. “Shhh. But so are you. Boston was one opportu-

nity for advancement I was pursuing. The other is here in town at the

university. My supervisor recommended me for a teaching position,

an assistant professorship for now, but there is room and possibility

for advancement. You understand that?”

Val nodded and again, opened his mouth to speak, but Adrian

tapped his lips firmly with his finger. “I’m not finished speaking. This

time you listen.” He laughed as Val’s eyes narrowed and he nipped

Adrian’s finger with sharp teeth. “All right, I’ll hurry. I love you. I

have always loved you and I always will. But after ten years of wait-

ing, it seemed that maybe you never would be ready to admit that

Lee Brazil

you loved me too. So I applied to schools out of state and for this job

here. I figured I would pin you down one way or another, then my

choice would be made for me. It all depended on you, Val. You were

the missing piece of the puzzle of my future.”

The stunning smile on Val’s face was one he’d never seen before.

“So, you’re saying I made the decision for you?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. Now where the fuck is the bedroom? Earlier, that was

nice, but I’ve been celibate for at least two weeks now, and...”

How they made it to the bedroom when they couldn’t keep their

hands off each other, Adrian couldn’t recall, but soon enough he had

Val in his bed where he’d wanted him forever. Brief thoughts of the

lovely blue silky rope he’d purchased so long ago flitted through his

head, but Adrian decided he had plenty of time to convince Val to let

him tie him up.

“Shhh...” Adrian stole a swift kiss from Val’s panting mouth be-

fore moving on to trail his lips over the smooth arch of throat and the

enticing line of Val’s collarbone. Val groaned in approval and tried

to push Adrian down to his nipples, but Adrian resisted, wanting to

explore as much as he could before the overwhelming need that clam-

ored inside of him to claim this man, to mark him forever as his own,

erupted out of control. His teeth closed lightly on the slightly protrud-

ing bone and he nibbled along the length.

Val’s hands on his flesh left a trail of prickling heat along his flesh

and Adrian pulled back to whip off his T-shirt. Fingers on the but-

tons of his Levis, he studiously ignored the demands of his own cock,

heavy and aching. His eyes met Val’s, and he saw the man’s gaze dip

to his hands before rising again.

“I want to see you. To touch you. I need you, Adrian.”

The urge to tease, to take his time, was lost. He’d waited so long

already. Jerking at just the right angle, the buttons popped open in

order, one by one, in rapid succession. His cock fell from the opening

and he gave a harsh groan of relief at the freedom.

“Fuck!” Val’s appreciation of that little trick was clear in his voice.

He reached forward and yanked at the denim that clung to Adrian’s

hips, but too impatient now to wait, Adrian shoved him away. He

pushed Val’s thighs apart and knelt between them. Finesse could

wait. Right now, need guided his actions, and somehow, he knew Val

would appreciate it.

The Librarian

He darted forward and sealed their lips together. He fumbled on

the nightstand for the condom and lube he’d placed there a few days

earlier. He swiftly coated his fingers with the lube and reached down

between Val’s legs to circle the tiny hole there. Applying steady pres-

sure, he pushed one finger inside the heat and twisted it. Val cried out

into Adrian’s mouth and lifted his hips, rubbing their cocks together.

The rough caress of the denim against flesh just added to the stimula-

tion.

With a groan, Adrian pulled back from the kiss and gently worked

a second finger in beside the first. He pumped his fingers, deep, hard

thrusts, scissoring them open to prepare Val for his cock.

“Now, please, now!” Val begged.

“Now,” he agreed, pulling his fingers out of the tight haven. He

unrolled the condom down his length and slicked it with more lube

before pressing it to the eager opening. As he slid gently forward,

he leaned down to press another kiss on Val’s open lips. The tight,

enclosing heat was maddening, addictive. Adrian forced himself to

pause briefly when he could push forward no further into the clinging

heat. He stared down into glittering blue eyes, and wound his fingers

through soft blue locks of hair. “I love you.” The whispered words he

exhaled on a breath were an oath, a promise.

“I know that. Fuck me already.”

Adrian chuckled softly. That was his Val, demanding, indepen-

dent, impatient.

His drew back, thrust forward, and Val moved to meet him. Their

combined groans and sighs of pleasure filled the large room. Despite

his desire to savor this moment, to draw out the pleasure of being

one, emotionally and physically, with Val, Adrian knew he couldn’t

last much longer. Soon, unable to prevent the orgasm that had his

balls squeezed tight to his body, Adrian reached between them to find

Val’s throbbing erection. A few swift, firm strokes of his hand, and

Val writhed in release beneath him as thick streams of creamy semen

spurted from his cock to land in gleaming pools on the pale flesh of

his chest and stomach.

Unable to hold back, Adrian panted as he thrust again, his cock

enthralled by the pulsing of Val’s inner muscles as he came. He

groaned loudly as his own release flooded the condom and collapsed

forward to rest on his elbows above Val before twisting sideways so

they rested in each other’s arms, bodies still entwined.

Lee Brazil

“So, a promotion at work, huh?” The confident tone of Val’s com-

ment sent a ripple of satisfaction through Adrian.

“Yeah, I’m going to teach three introductory-level library science

courses and work on an individualized PhD program.”

“Will you still have time to help me remodel the shop? I mean, I

can do it myself, but I’d have a lot more fun doing it with you.”

Smiling contentedly, Adrian whispered back, “I’ll always have

time for you.”

Biography

I’m an avid reader and former teacher of grammar and composi-

tion who believes that falling in love is the grandest adventure anyone

can have. In a nutshell, that’s every story I have to tell.

Relocating from the crazy pace of life in Southern California’s

Orange County to the beautiful and leisurely atmosphere of the Illi-

nois countryside has given me the time to indulge the desire to write,

which I’d set aside when I started teaching fourteen years ago. Read-

ers can find out more about me and my writing by visiting my blog,

Lee’s Musings or finding me on Facebook. Feel free to drop me a line

at lee.brazil@ymail.com.

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