The Forgotten
Wolf at the Door
Cody is a wolf willing to wait for Mr. Right, even if that means
prolonging his curse. He’s going to enjoy vacation without a care,
but when his Sentinel doesn't show up he’s forced to don a leafy
loin cloth and hope a Good Samaritan comes along. He just never
expected his hero to be an adorable nymph who views him as an
interview subject.
Rafael is a germaphobe writing a thesis paper on the Forgotten.
During his field research trip he meets Cody and is immediately
struck by how handsome the wolf is. Altruism quickly blossoms
into passion and happily ever after seems inevitable.
However, people associated with Rafael’s paper start turning up
dead and Rafael has to figure out quickly if publishing secrets is
worth the risk to his health and his newfound relationship. As
unseen enemies circle closer, the wolf at the door might be the
only one standing between him and the end.
Genre: Alternative (M/M or F/F), Contemporary, Fantasy,
Paranormal, Vampires/Werewolves
Length: 38,744 words
WOLF AT THE DOOR
The Forgotten
Jana Downs
EVERLASTING CLASSIC
MANLOVE
Siren Publishing, Inc.
www.SirenPublishing.com
ABOUT THE E-BOOK YOU HAVE PURCHASED:
Your non-refundable purchase of this e-book allows you to
only ONE LEGAL copy for your own personal reading on
your own personal computer or device. You do not have
resell or distribution rights without the prior written
permission of both the publisher and the copyright
owner of this book. This book cannot be copied in any
format, sold, or otherwise transferred from your computer
to another through upload to a file sharing peer to peer
program, for free or for a fee, or as a prize in any contest.
Such action is illegal and in violation of the U.S. Copyright
Law. Distribution of this e-book, in whole or in part, online,
offline, in print or in any way or any other method currently
known or yet to be invented, is forbidden. If you do not
want this book anymore, you must delete it from your
computer.
WARNING: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution
of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright
infringement, including infringement without monetary
gain, is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to 5
years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000.
If you find a Siren-BookStrand e-book being sold or shared
illegally, please let us know at
legal@sirenbookstrand.com
A SIREN PUBLISHING BOOK
IMPRINT: Everlasting Classic ManLove
WOLF AT THE DOOR
Copyright © 2014 by Jana Downs
E-book ISBN: 978-1-62741-833-1
First E-book Publication: June 2014
Cover design by Sloan Winters
All art and logo copyright © 2014 by Siren Publishing, Inc.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: This literary work may not be
reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, including
electronic or photographic reproduction, in whole or in part, without
express written permission.
All characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any resemblance
to actual persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.
PUBLISHER
Siren Publishing, Inc.
www.SirenPublishing.com
Letter to Readers
Dear Readers,
If you have purchased this copy of Wolf at the Door by Jana Downs
from BookStrand.com or its official distributors, thank you. Also,
thank you for not sharing your copy of this book.
Regarding E-book Piracy
This book is copyrighted intellectual property. No other individual or
group has resale rights, auction rights, membership rights, sharing
rights, or any kind of rights to sell or to give away a copy of this
book.
The author and the publisher work very hard to bring our paying
readers high-quality reading entertainment.
This is Jana Downs’s livelihood. It’s fair and simple. Please respect
Ms. Downs’s right to earn a living from her work.
Amanda Hilton, Publisher
www.SirenPublishing.com
www.BookStrand.com
AUTHOR’S NOTE
The Legend
The laws of the paranormal world are few and simple, but they are
absolute. The most sacred of these directives is also the simplest—no
human shall come to perish by the actions of a Nightkin.
For centuries, the Nightkins lived in secrecy and peace amongst
the humans, but not all were content with their blessed life. In their
arrogant, misguided hatred of the mortals, four tribes of shifter
Nightkins—pumas, bears, wolves, and eagles—banded together and
fought against the humans, killing and burning everything in their
path.
Saddened by the savageness of their children, the great Ancestors
sought to not only punish them, but to teach them compassion,
tolerance, and love. Cursing the four tribes, the Ancestors decreed that
no longer would the shifters have control over their beasts, but that
their beasts would control them. Each member of the tribes would live
as their animal counterpart, sentient, but unable to change between
forms.
Every twenty-five years, on the night of the summer solstice, the
shifters would be granted their human skins. During their reprieve
they would seek out their mates, because only the gift of love—both
given and received—could break their curse. If a Nightkin could not
find his mate by midnight on the winter solstice, however, he would
become a beast once more, alone and forgotten.
The curse is theirs forever, and as immortals, forever is a very
long time.
WOLF AT THE DOOR
The Forgotten
JANA DOWNS
Copyright © 2014
Chapter One
Cody stretched, luxuriating in the smell of damp earth around
him. His napping spot just inside the circle of the clearing was always
pleasant to wake up to. The fact that he was waking up human for the
first time in twenty-five years was a definite plus.
He rolled to his stomach before getting his knees up under him
and then forcing himself to his feet. He sniffed the air, eyes scanning
his territory looking for signs of his Sentinel. It was strange. Russell
was usually here by now. In fact, Russell usually showed up a few
hours before the transition and never left his side until his six months
were up.
The clearing was bright and sunny this morning, the heat of the
day already causing sweat to form on his human skin. It would be a
good day for hunting, but it would be an even better day to find some
clothes and head to the city.
Rustling near the edge of the forest drew his attention, and for a
brief moment he thought it was Russell just arriving. A teasing
remark was on the tip of his tongue, but the foliage parted and One
Eye poked his head out. Cody gave a rumbled greeting, kneeling on
the ground so that the old Wolf wouldn’t be intimidated by his greater
size. One Eye had been part of the pack since he was a pup, the
Wolf at the Door
9
offspring of the former Alpha. Cody had been wrestling with him
since he was a few months old.
“Hi there, old friend.” He extended his hand for One Eye to smell.
“I know you’re not used to seeing me like this, but I hope we can still
be friends.” While he knew in theory that it was insane to talk to a
wolf like he was Cody’s best friend, he also knew that pack
connections went beyond species. He’d hunted with the pack, bedded
down with the pack, and lived closely to them for the past fifty years.
He thought of himself as their guardian of sorts.
One Eye lapped at his fingers, whining in a way that told Cody
that he was neither intimidated nor fazed by the change in Cody’s
body. He smiled, reaching out and scratching him behind the ears in
just the right space. “Well, I guess it’s just you and I for the time
being. I think Russell slept in today.”
His friend huffed like he was judging Russell. The action tickled
Cody for some reason, and he found himself giggling about it. “Yeah,
that’s what I thought, too. I bet he forgot what day it is.” Cody would
never be able to forget what day it was. His life subsisted on cycles,
be they the moon, the migration pattern of prey, or the cycle of his
imprisonment. At any rate, he was a slave to the ebb and flow of his
universe. He supposed other creatures weren’t so different, but he was
a bit more dependent on those cycles than most.
“What do you say to walking me out of here?” he asked One Eye,
slowly pushing himself up to his full height.
The wolf huffed again like he was displeased with the notion.
“Aw, don’t be like that. It’s only six months.” Six months in Wolf
time was like an eternity, he knew. However, the pack would just
have to get on without him. The new Alpha, who Cody had
nicknamed Vlad on account of his wickedly long canines, was a
strong leader, an animal that could lead them well in Cody’s absence.
He never could be sure what they actually thought of him, but he
imagined that he was a little bit of a curiosity. He believed they
understood what Nightkin were, had seen them react to more than a
10
Jana Downs
few over the course of time that he’d been around them. But he so
rarely shifted that he was almost certain that they viewed him in an
entirely different light.
Walking through the forest without the benefits of paws to protect
him was not his ideal way to take a stroll. Sharp sticks, rocks, and a
variety of prickly foliage conspired to stab his tender feet as he
walked the familiar trail toward the road where Russell usually picked
him up. He wasn’t entirely sure what he was going to do once he
reached it. It wasn’t like he had any clothes anywhere near here, and
he couldn’t very well walk into town bare assed. He worried his
bottom lip.
There was a cabin not too far from here that might have had some
clothes in it. He knew that the owners only came up on weekends and
for planned vacations periodically throughout the summer, but the
cabin was empty most of the time. Considering the time of year, it
was a gamble to go up there, but he didn’t have much of a choice
since Russell was nowhere in sight and clothing was not an optional
thing for most humans.
The musky smell of wolf rose up and lingered in Cody’s nostrils
as One Eye pressed close. Cody looked down as One Eye nuzzled his
thigh. When his eyes were closed, his right eye disappeared because
the fur there was a shade darker than the rest of his gray body. The
shade was almost black it was so dark gray. When Cody had first seen
him he thought he only had one eyeball. Thus the nickname.
“What’s wrong? You’re being awfully needy today.” It was
probably the change. Wolves liked routine, and he knew that he was
going to throw the entire pack off for a few days at least. Granted, he
left more often than most of the other pack members. “You guys will
be fine without me,” he promised. “Besides, I’ll be back before you
know it.” If he could ever get out of the woods and back to
“civilization.” They might not have to miss him at all if he couldn’t
find some clothes. He could always fashion a pair of leaf litter tighty
Wolf at the Door
11
whities to wear if he got too desperate. Though the prospect of
wearing a Robinson Crusoe–style diaper didn’t appeal. At all.
He tripped over a root, banging the tender soles of his feet on the
hard wood of a nearby tree and nearly falling to his knees in the
underbrush. He cursed his soft feet and exposed body. This was going
to be a long-ass hike.
* * * *
“Rafael Lorenzo Rinaldi,” he said as he approached the woman
sitting behind the counter. “I’m here to see Professor Claymore.” And
he was incredibly nervous about it as well, though he didn’t tell her
that much. When he had received Professor Claymore’s e-mail asking
him to schedule an appointment to discuss his thesis two days ago, the
nail biting had begun.
She smiled, the lines of her face becoming more pronounced as
she did so. She was clearly someone who smiled a lot and it was
displayed in the laugh lines of her face. The secretary of the
anthropology department, whose name Rafael could still never
remember despite the six years he’d been studying at Western
Carolina University, had been that way every time Rafael had stepped
foot in this part of the building. “Go ahead, Rafael. He’s expecting
you.”
He didn’t need instructions to Claymore’s office. He must have
visited the place a hundred times before. He’d just never visited the
place while he was so incredibly nervous. The door opened before he
reached for the handle, which his OCD was grateful for.
“Rafael! How is my favorite Nightkin doing?” Claymore greeted.
He always reminded Rafael of a Coca-Cola Santa Claus. With a round
body, full white beard, and jovial disposition, it was no wonder that
everyone else made the same comparison.
Rafael shrugged. “You tell me. Is there something wrong with my
thesis?” Despite being a contemporary of ancient Rome, without a
12
Jana Downs
formal degree in Nightkin studies everything he had to say on the
subject was considered ill-informed or somehow tainted by his
experience. As soon as he got this stupid piece of paper with his
degree on it, then he could start making “informed” claims about his
fellow Nightkin.
“No, no, not at all. It’s good news.” Claymore waved him inside,
and Rafael followed his direction.
The man’s office always gave Rafael heart palpitations. He curled
his hands into fists by his side in an attempt to suppress the urge to
clean. It wasn’t that things were particularly dusty or dirty. It was just
so damn cluttered. Papers everywhere, pens all over the floor, and
books strewn about like discarded newspaper articles made his skin
crawl. He counted slowly backward from ten, as his shrink had
instructed him to do when his anxiety spiked. Dr. Carmichael always
marveled at how he made it through the dark ages while being so
clean and meticulous.
It hadn’t been easy.
He took a seat in his normal chair, the familiar comfort of
sameness easing the burden of his compulsion somewhat. “So, is this
just you checking in with me?” Rafael asked. Claymore knew he was
a little bit of a shut-in. He had trouble with germs, crowds, social
interaction, house pets, and dusty bookshelves. That was just to name
a few of his quirks. Attending classes had been a nightmare in
undergrad, necessitating a note from the special assistance office that
enabled him to sit in on his classes via Skype if the class was
particularly crowded and didn’t allow him enough space.
Claymore circled behind his desk, stepping over a stack of tests
that probably needed grading. He must have noticed the direction of
Rafael’s gaze because he looked down at said stack and gave a
sheepish smile. “Remind me to let you take those home to grade for
me.”
Rafael nodded, though his heart pounded. The test on the syllabus
had to have been moved for the Intro to Nightkin Studies class.
Wolf at the Door
13
Claymore’s other TA taught that section during the 8:00 to 11:00 a.m.
block before Rafael came in at noon to teach some of the upper-level
anthropology classes. Though his concentration was in Nightkin
studies, Rafael had been stuck with several classes whose subjects
bored him to tears. Such as his anthropology of religious evolution
class, which was basically a broad history lesson which looked at both
the outside influences on religion during the time period and the
cultural revolutions that caused religious doctrines and ideals to
change over time. It was just as boring as it sounded, perhaps more
so. Claymore always saved the best classes for himself. Which was
just as well. It allowed Rafael to attend them for credit as opposed to
teaching them.
“Is Todd behind on his grading again?” Rafael asked. There were
times he believed he did more of Todd’s work than Todd did. Sure,
Todd got stuck with the lecture, but it seemed more and more lately
that Rafael got stuck with the grading.
Claymore nodded. “’Fraid so. He hit a snag with his thesis, so I’m
not surprised. Poor guy had to start over.”
Rafael winced at that. He could completely sympathize. The idea
of having to start his one-hundred-and-fifty-page monster over again
was enough to cause him to break out in a cold sweat. “So,” he began,
getting them back on topic. “What did I come here for?”
“Everything in your thesis is good,” Claymore said, returning to
business. “Your examples are solid, your research is used originally,
and your argument is sound.”
“So what is the problem?”
“Well, the problem is that not enough of the research is your own.
You need to conduct your own study or launch some kind of
investigatory hunt to back up the resources you already used.”
Claymore tapped his pointer finger on the top of his desk. “I think that
if you can get some additional research that you conducted yourself
under your belt, your paper will be ready for publication.”
14
Jana Downs
Rafael was shocked. He never expected Claymore to recommend
publication for his thesis, considering how he had initially been
reluctant to let Rafael choose the subject he had. Then the rest of what
Claymore had said struck him. “You want me to do field research into
a race of Nightkin that either do not exist anymore or are impossible
to differentiate from other Nightkin once they have found their life
mates?” He couldn’t even wrap his mind around such a project. It
would be a massive undertaking, one that had very little chance of
producing reasonable research. In some ways it would be akin to him
going Sasquatch hunting in the Appalachian Mountains. A needle in a
haystack would have nothing compared to the type of study Claymore
was asking for.
“I think if you can find living examples of your subjects it will
add to the validity of your thesis,” Claymore said. “It may be an
impossible endeavor. However, if you can accomplish it, you will
become the foremost authority on the Forgotten among the peerage.”
Irritation speared him. The Forgotten weren’t a theory to him.
Their curse and their existence had been common knowledge to most
Nightkin his age, especially Nightkin with any connection to the New
World. His father had bought one of them accidently at an auction in
Rome in the late seventeen hundreds. The exotic panther had been
bought as a gift for his mother to add to her extensive menagerie at
their villa. Several weeks after purchasing him, the animal shifted into
a man and told them all the story of the curse and the subsequent time
restrictions that he was under.
Ultimately he changed back to his animal form at the winter
solstice and remained that way for another twenty-five years. It
wasn’t until, during one of his six month intervals, he found the
woman whom he wished to claim with a claiming mark that he was
able to retain his human shape. The whole process had been a
fascinating cycle to witness.
Over time the event had drifted into the back of his mind until he
was reminded by a wizened old drunk at a pub in London. Curious as
Wolf at the Door
15
to what happened to the people who shared the cat’s fate, he began his
research. The Forgotten had assumed the identity of that name. No
one, neither Nightkin or human, younger than a certain age even
remembered they existed. Even the older members of his kind
attributed their existence to myth, legend, and hearsay. It was as if
they’d been deliberately erased from memory.
“I can prove their historical existence. I can prove that there was
an event which was the catalyst for their twenty-five-year cycles. I
can even prove that the legend has dated back to the late 1600s.
However, asking me to find a living Nightkin which has not either
found his or her mate or is stuck in animal form is a bit much, don’t
you think?” He had no idea where even to begin to accomplish such a
task.
Claymore extended a piece of paper out to him. “I’ve done some
digging. Your research made me curious. I found that there are
several instances of people who swear that there is a wolf that has
been around for the last fifty years in the Appalachian State Park over
in Cherokee County. Locals claim that wolf has been hanging around
with the same pack of wolves that long.”
“So?”
“They also say,” Claymore continued, “the wolf periodically
disappears for about half a year but then it returns to the pack it left. I
wouldn’t have believed it or even taken it seriously had it not been for
the photographic evidence that one of the wolf researchers at the park
sent me. The wolf has a very unusual coloring, and it has been
documented for at least the past twenty odd years. I think it is worth
the time and effort to check it out. It’s not even like you’ll have to go
very far. It’s only a thirty- to forty-minute drive.”
The irritation from the moment before melted away almost
instantly. “So you think this may be legitimate? Could we actually be
talking about one of the Forgotten?” They’d already flown out to
Oklahoma to check out reports of a mountain lion that could’ve been
a possible member of the Forgotten, but that study had gone nowhere
16
Jana Downs
fast. He wasn’t ready for another disappointment like the last one. It
was one of the reasons he’d stuck with his historical research from
that point on.
Claymore grinned, patting his generous waist with his right hand.
“I’m not sure.” He winked. “You’re the expert. But I think you should
check it out. This could be the beginning of a study that will change
the anthropological community in a big way. Whether there are
biological or magical roots to this ‘curse’ is going to be a subject
wildly debated.” He looked downright giddy at the thought. Rafael
understood. He was rather giddy about prospect himself.
“So the contact information for this person who brought it to your
attention is on this form?”
Claymore nodded.
“Good. How soon do you want me to start?”
“Immediately. Angela will take over your afternoon classes while
you conduct your research. You’ll be expected to keep up with the
grading, of course. But otherwise you will be unencumbered and free
to conduct this study as you wish. If you want, you can take a few of
the independent studies anthropology students and use them as interns
for the grunt work. I’ll just need a proposal from you before you head
out.”
Rafael nodded, pushing himself to his feet. “I’ll e-mail it to you
by the end of today.” He switched the piece of paper to his other hand
before extending his hand to shake Claymore’s. “Thank you for the
lead.”
Claymore gave him another of those jovial smiles of his, the kind
that went all the way up to his eyes and caused them to wrinkle
around the edges. “You know me. Anytime I can steer an enterprising
mind toward an interesting research topic, I am morally programmed
to do so.”
Rafael found himself chuckling, which was a feat in itself,
considering he was itching to employ the hand sanitizer he had tucked
in his pocket from grasping the other man’s hand. “I suppose it pays
Wolf at the Door
17
to be young and full of possibilities,” he teased. It was a running joke
between the two of them given their appearances and their age
differences. Rafael may have looked young enough to be Claymore’s
grandson, but in all reality he was old enough to be one of Claymore’s
ancient ancestors.
The professor laughed, rolling his eyes at Rafael’s joke. “Don’t
push your luck, boy. I still have control over that grand thesis of
yours.”
He spent a few more minutes saying his good-byes, drenching his
hands with hand sanitizer as he did so, before he let himself out of
Claymore’s office and then made his way to the elevator which would
take him to the ground floor. He had many phone calls to make and
arrangements to be made. He mentally went through the list of the
interns which Claymore had recommended to use and found them all
lacking. He didn’t want to risk them messing something up if this
ended up being legitimate.
He slipped his nitrile gloves on as he approached the elevator. No
way was he touching the button. He’d watched the janitorial staff long
enough to know they didn’t clean as thoroughly as they should given
the enormity of the population on campus. He pressed the button and
waited for the elevator to climb to the third floor.
His mind wasn’t on the elevator though. It wasn’t on the walk
back home or even the overdue library books that were stuffed into
the bottom of his computer bag. The chances of discovering a
Nightkin that was actually a member of the forgotten race was slim to
none. This opportunity was one he couldn’t afford to pass up.
He paused as he stepped into the elevator. If the Nightkin was still
in wolf form, there would be trees involved. Trees and dirt, fungus,
feces, animals, and dander. All those things were nightmares to him.
He forced himself to take a breath before he hyperventilated. I am a
professional. I am a Nightkin, a being whose ancestry is intimately
tied to nature. I will not be afraid of a few flowers no matter the
pollen content. He would just need to go into the forest prepared.
18
Jana Downs
Besides, he could always go home and take an extra hot shower after
if necessary.
Armed with a plan, he stepped out of the elevator with confidence.
If he were completely honest with himself, he would admit that this
was perhaps the most exciting thing that had happened in the past
several hundred years. Now if he could find the Nightkin in the
photographs, he would be one step closer to attaining both his PhD
and answers to the questions that had been circulating in his mind for
years.
With an extra spring in his step, he stepped out of the elevator and
into his next project.
Wolf at the Door
19
Chapter Two
“Well, that went well,” Cody drawled, sarcasm dripping from
every word. One Eye looked up at him and rumbled as if to say “I told
you so.” Cody huffed, rubbing at the scratches that now decorated his
torso. Running away from angry humans wasn’t normally how he
enjoyed spending his first day of freedom. However, it could’ve been
worse. After all, he could’ve been arrested. That would’ve been one
hell of a thing to explain to the police. Don’t worry, Officer. I don’t
normally break into cabins. I just needed some clothes. I don’t have
any. Since I’m only human once every twenty-five years, it doesn’t
make sense to keep them around. Oh yeah. That would go over very
well.
He sighed and picked one of the four thorns out of his skin that
was piercing awfully close to his dick. “All right. I guess I will be
wearing Tarzan’s diaper after all.” He was going to kill Russell. He
couldn’t imagine that the man had actually forgotten about the
summer solstice. It just blew his mind. A Sentinel’s job was to look
after the Forgotten. Period. One job shouldn’t have been that difficult
to accomplish, at least in theory. “What god did I piss off?” he
muttered, wincing as he picked out yet another thorn.
The fine hairs on the back of his neck rose as he felt someone
watching him. He turned his head, looking over shoulder. “Are you
going to stalk me all day?” he asked, sniffing the air. Fluffy, the
biggest beta in the pack, came stomping out of the nearby shrubbery.
As big and bulky as he was, Cody was surprised he was able to keep
quiet as long as he had. Of course, Fluffy really didn’t like Cody. He
hadn’t liked Cody since he was a pup and Cody had nipped him on
20
Jana Downs
the nose for being a brat. The male held a little bit of a grudge. Well,
as much of a grudge as a wolf could have, he supposed.
No doubt Fluffy hadn’t come to see him off or to just say hello.
Most likely the alpha was gathering up the pack for a hunt. He
strained his sadly human ears and found the familiar call was playing
distantly like music from another neighborhood. It made sense now
why Fluffy was there. He’d probably come to get them.
“Sorry,” he said. “I can’t this time. You know human bodies are
pretty useless for hunting by themselves.” He looked over at One Eye.
“The pack needs you. Look after them while I’m gone, huh?” One
Eye licked his fingers as if to say good-bye before turning with Fluffy
and heading into the brush. As happy as he was to be man shaped
again, he was going to miss them.
He spent the next half hour wandering around picking out foliage
that he could possibly fashion together like some sort of skirt.
Unfortunately, most of the bendy bits of brush were itchy as hell. He
was probably going to give himself a rash using them. He giggled at
the thought. Nothing said welcome back to humanity like an itchy
crotch and an unexplainable rash.
After he was reasonably sure that all his good bits were covered,
he headed back in the direction he’d just come, anxious to get on with
the next six months of his life. He and Russell had discussed a game
plan last time that involved him heading to the progressive university
area nearby in hopes of stumbling across a nature-loving sex kitten
with a soft spot for dogs. He knew logically that it was probably not
in his best interest to be overly picky. However, as an immortal he
saw no reason to rush the process even if he was stuck in cycles of
twenty-five years with only six months as a man.
He actually liked being in his animal form and would probably
spend a good amount of time in it even after the curse was broken. If
he could find someone local, even better. He was loath to leave his
wolves behind. He’d watched over them for generations, and it just
Wolf at the Door
21
seemed wrong to abandon them when he found a lover who actually
wanted to be claimed by his crazy ass.
It would be nice having someone though. While he didn’t have
many monetary assets, he did have a zest for life that could lead to
some very interesting adventures if his partner were so inclined.
He shook his head to clear it of the fantasy. One thing at a time.
He needed to get out of the park and find a pay phone so he could call
Russell. He wasn’t going to stumble across Prince Charming in the
woods. He chuckled at the thought of playing Sleeping Beauty to a
prince riding by on a white horse. Clearly, he’d watched far too many
Disney movies the last time he was here.
Of course his favorite was still the Jungle Book. He could really
relate to Mowgli. He, too, had a difficult time imagining leaving the
jungle for a nice penthouse in some concrete city somewhere. He may
have been one of the Forgotten, but he was first and foremost a Wolf-
shifter. He belonged in the woods.
The snap of a twig was his only warning that someone had snuck
up on him. “Excuse me,” an unfamiliar voice said from behind him.
Steeling himself for the inevitable questions and censure, Cody
turned. He blinked slowly at the man in front of him. He looked like
he was wearing a beekeeper’s outfit, obscuring all but the most basic
traits of his features. He was only around five eight compared to
Cody’s six-two frame and was built like a waif.
“Uh, hi.” He didn’t know what else to say. Who traipsed around
the woods in a beekeeper’s outfit?
The man shifted from foot to foot, clearly nervous and probably as
uncomfortable as Cody felt at the moment. “Well, er, I’m a bit lost.”
He lifted a map that looked like one of the trail guides that the park
rangers gave to people who went on hikes. If that was so, Mr.
Beekeeper was very, very, very lost. The nearest trail was over five
miles in the opposite direction.
22
Jana Downs
“I’m not a GPS,” he teased, perhaps a bit cruelly given the fact
that the guy looked like he was about twenty seconds from dissolving
into hysterics.
Pearly white teeth sank into the guy’s bottom lip beyond the
mesh. “Clearly,” he snipped.
Whoops. He hadn’t meant to ruffle the guy’s feathers. “Sorry
about that,” he apologized. “I’m not exactly used to people anymore.”
The guy sighed. “Me either. Um, well, what I mean is, I’m not
very good with most people. You, uh, looked like you might know
your way around here.”
Cody tilted his head to the side, staring at his new companion
curiously. “What makes you say that?”
“Uh, you look very attuned to nature.” The guy’s eyes went
everywhere but on Cody.
He looked down at himself. Okay, he could understand that the
guy probably thought he was some crazy hermit given his current
dress. “I don’t have any clothes with me. Sorry about that. My friend
was supposed to bring them, but he never showed.” He sniffed the air
subtly. At least he hoped it was subtle. The man in front of him was
definitely Nightkin. He just couldn’t pinpoint what kind.
He didn’t think he was a shifter because most shifters or
werewolves didn’t react that way to nudity. Vampire seemed unlikely
as well, just because Cody had smelled enough bloodsuckers to know
that they always smelled a little bit like iron. So what the heck was
he? It was going to drive him nuts.
The guy’s eyes widened. “Oh? Are you on a run? You’re
Nightkin?”
Clearly the beekeeper didn’t have sharpened senses when it came
to sensing other Nightkin. Cody nodded. “Born and bred.” He
extended his hand. “I’m Cody.”
Beekeeper hesitated a moment before reaching out and taking
Cody’s hand. “I’m Rafael. I work in the anthropology department at
the university. Nightkin studies.”
Wolf at the Door
23
“Cool.” Nightkin studies? Since when did the humans give a crap
about studying them? The last time he’d been here they pretty much
declared all Nightkin godless heathens. Not for the first time since
waking up in the woods he wished that Russell was here. Sentinels
were supposed to supply information and assistance to their wards.
Without him, Cody was bound to struggle .
“It’s nice to meet you,” he said, shaking the other man’s hand
firmly. At least he remembered some of his manners. “So which trail
did you come off of?” It was on the tip of his tongue to ask what kind
of Nightkin the beekeeper was, but he refrained. He didn’t want to
ruin his display of good manners by displaying his bad ones.
Rafael sighed, frustration clear in every line of his body. “I have
no idea. All of them have ridiculous names. Which, in theory, should
make them easy to remember. However, it doesn’t. I was following
the map somewhat, but mostly I was tracking a group of wolves that
have territory around here. Some of them were tagged for research,
and I thought I could track them using the app I downloaded for my
phone that the rangers gave me.”
Cody frowned. He usually didn’t mind so much when the rangers
came to check on the wolves and keep track of them with those little
collar things they were forever sticking around their necks, but Rafael
wasn’t a biologist, so why the heck did he need access to Cody’s
wolves? “Why are you trying to find them?” He knew he should try to
be a little more subtle about the fact that he wasn’t happy that Rafael
was tracking his wolves, but subtlety had never really been his forte in
his animal skin or out of it.
Rafael shifted again as if he sensed Cody’s displeasure even if his
tone remained friendly. “I’m not actually conducting a study on them,
but I’m hoping they lead me to something.”
“Yeah? What’s that?”
The smell of discomfort wafted up to irritate Cody’s nostrils. “It’s
for my thesis. I’m discussing one of the lost races of shifter. My
24
Jana Downs
professor thinks that a little hands-on experience will help to drive my
point home.”
“What sort of shifter?” Cody asked, curiosity taking over where
his overprotectiveness left off. And does it involve a beekeeping
costume? Because if so I have to see it. The idea of something like a
wasp-shifter seemed ridiculous given the comparable size.
“Wolf-shifter,” Rafael said, enthusiasm finally overtaking his fear.
“The Forgotten have been largely dismissed in most academic circles
and most Nightkin circles as well, but I came to prove that they still
exist and have always existed since the late 1600s.”
Cody laughed. He couldn’t help it. The idea that someone was so
interested in his kind that they donned a beekeeper’s outfit just to
possibly catch a glimpse at someone who may or may not have been a
human once every twenty-five years seemed absolutely beyond
hilarious for some reason.
Rafael glared. “It’s not funny. I’ve done some very significant
research in an effort to prove their existence.” He crossed his arms
over his chest. “Forget it. I’ll find my own way back.” He whipped
around so fast that Cody was surprised he didn’t give himself
whiplash.
“Wait!” he called as he managed to suppress the next round of
giggling before it could escape. “Don’t leave. I can really help you
out with this problem. It was just unexpected.”
Rafael the beekeeper spun back in his direction. “Why’s that?”
Man, someone has their panties in a twist. “Because you’re
wearing a hazmat suit looking for a Wolf-shifter,” he said, pointedly
staring at the other man’s clothes. He smelled the blush that rose to
Rafael’s cheeks at that. “Do you think you’re going to catch
something?” He knew if the answer was “yes” he should be offended.
However, it was just too funny. The novelty of it just tickled him.
“No,” Rafael murmured, staring at his feet like a little kid was
being chastised. “I don’t do all this.” He waved his arm at their
surroundings.
Wolf at the Door
25
“What? Nature?”
Rafael nodded.
“What kind of Nightkin are you?” Cody didn’t recall ever meeting
a Nightkin that didn’t have some connection to the natural world.
Okay, maybe vampires, but they were the exception rather than the
rule. Even demons went back to something primal.
Rafael raised his chin in defiance. “I’m a nymph. A water nymph
to be precise.”
Cody lost it. Nymphs were about as close to nature as Nightkin
got. There weren’t many in the US, living mostly in Europe or the
Mediterranean, but they weren’t unheard of. They still lived in the
wild places with the exception of elves, who had taken to running
tattoo parlors out of claiming shops. He laughed until tears streaked
down his face.
“You. Are. An. Ass.” Rafael stomped off without another word,
fury etched into his expression.
“Wait!” Cody said, jogging to catch up to the surprisingly swift-
footed nymph. “I’m sorry to poke fun. You have to admit it’s funny
seeing a Nightkin all nervous about silly things like mosquitoes.”
Rafael stopped abruptly, turning around and jabbing Cody hard in
the chest with his glove-clad pointer finger. “I’ll have you know that
mosquitoes carry a variety of blood-borne pathogens, diseases, and
germs. And all this ‘nature’ that you believe is so harmless has been
killing people for thousands of years. It’s unsanitary.” The way he
said “unsanitary” made Cody believe the word was probably akin to a
capital offense, at least in Rafael’s mind.
He held up his hands in surrender. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I won’t
say another word about your strange dress or weird phobias.” It was
on the tip of his tongue to remind the guy that he was an immortal,
but he figured that, too, would be lost on Rafael’s sense of humor.
“Just leave me alone. You can’t help me,” Rafael said, turning
back the way he’d started.
26
Jana Downs
Cody’s lips twitched and amusement. “Okay…But, you’re headed
in the wrong direction.” That gave the other man pause. He stopped,
turned, and then raised his eyebrow in question. Cody pointed in the
correct direction. “It’s that way back to the nearest trail.”
“I don’t want to go to the nearest trail. I want to find the wolves
and the Nightkin that is living with them.” He held up a small
rectangular object. “This should get me where I need to go.”
“But will it get you back to where you belong?” It was a
legitimate question. Whatever he had in his hands had gotten him lost
to begin with.
Rafael sighed. “Probably not,” he muttered.
This was much more fun than trying to track down Russell’s tardy
Sentinel ass. “I’ll make a deal with you,” Cody began. “I’ll take you
to the wolves and then lead you out of here, but in exchange you have
to lend me some clothes to wear.”
“That’s it?” Rafael asked, suspicion evident in his tone. “That’s
all you’ll require?”
Cody nodded. “I’m easy.” He was one of the most laid-back
people most had ever met. It was in his nature to have a sunny
disposition and a cavalier attitude.
Slowly, Rafael nodded his head in agreement. “Thank you.” It
sounded like the words tasted like ash, but Cody wasn’t going to call
him on it. He’d poked fun of the guy, and Rafael was sensitive. He
made a mental note not to do that again. He wasn’t trying to hurt the
other man’s feelings or rile them up. Rafael was just very strange to
Cody.
He wondered briefly if everyone had the same sorts of fears now.
They clearly didn’t follow the five-second rule anymore if they did,
which was sad considering how much good candy probably went to
waste once it hit the floor if it were true.
He led the way up the ravine, navigating the hard roots, acorns,
and rocks as best he could to spare his tender feet, but he still
managed to give himself a stone bruise by the time they reached the
Wolf at the Door
27
top. The nymph was panting like they’d run a marathon as they
crested the hill.
“If this is the pace you’re going to keep, we’re going to be here all
night,” Cody said, leaning against a nearby tree.
Rafael took out a bottle of water from the little khaki backpack he
wore and chugged a good portion of it. “I’m not used to all this,” he
grumped. “I spend my days in a library.”
“Are you sure you’re not a Brownie?” Cody teased, smiling softly
and giving Rafael a wink. He’d never personally met a Brownie, but
in the stories they were little homebodies that looked after the house
and were big fans of honey. Given the beekeeper outfit, Cody thought
it was appropriate.
Rafael rolled his eyes but otherwise ignored the comment. “So
have you spent a lot of time with the wolves?” he asked, completely
changing the subject. He straightened, regaining his breath. “There is
one in particular that I’m interested in.”
Cody feigned nonchalance. “Sure. I’ve spent a good bit of time
with them. Which one are you interested in?” He knew exactly which
one Rafael was interested in, but he had the sneaking suspicion that
Rafael would be less interested if he knew it was Cody whom he
sought.
“The pictures I’ve gotten show an almost completely white wolf
with just a diamond patch of gray fur on his chest. I believe that is the
Nightkin I’m looking for.”
Cody pushed off the tree and continued on the trail, using the
familiar scents of the forest to guide him. “How do you know it’s a
him?”
Rafael shot him a look that said he was the stupidest man that he’d
ever had the displeasure of meeting. “I know how to tell if the
creature is male or female. One would assume if it has balls and a
cock it’s a dude.”
The unexpected crudity actually made Cody’s face heat.
Considering it was his cock and balls that the other man was talking
28
Jana Downs
about, it was embarrassing. It weirded him out that someone had been
snapping pictures of his bits while he wasn’t looking.
Silence descended between them, not entirely comfortable but not
tension filled either. It seemed that neither of them really had
anything to say to the other, which was fine with Cody. As fun as
teasing Rafael was, he didn’t normally pick on people, and Rafael
seemed to take all of Cody’s teasing that way.
The flat land ahead had some colossal elk in it a few days ago.
There was a good chance that the pack was either actively hunting or
would soon be hunting in this area. He took up a position downwind
of a few of the prey animals.
“Why are we stopping?” Rafael asked, his voice hushed whisper.
Cody chuckled softly. “Wolves are the ghosts of the forest. If you
chase them you’ll never find them. You have to wait for them to come
to you.” He waved at the herd of elk as they rambled toward their
location. “It’s been a few days since they’ve eaten, and they’ll be
getting hungry soon. Last I saw them they were gathering a hunting
party. If they’re not already here, they’ll be here shortly.”
“I should have brought along one of the associate biology
professors,” he muttered underneath his breath. “This is far more
animal behavior than I’m used to dealing with.” He crouched down
beside Cody, taking a position on the ground and slightly behind the
brush surrounding the base of the tree.
Rafael was actually very cute. This close, Cody could see into the
mesh that covered his face. His eyes were a striking shade of green, a
perfect blend to the moss that grew on the sides of trees. Coupled with
a little button nose that had a slight upturn on the tip and lips that
were just plush enough to be considered kissable, Rafael was quite a
handsome man.
“What?” Rafael asked, his brow furrowing in confusion. “Is there
something wrong with my face?”
Cody commanded his body not to give a flagrant display of his
attraction. “Um, no. Nothing wrong. I just didn’t expect you to be so
Wolf at the Door
29
cute.” He tried to play off like a joke, but he sounded just a little bit
too interested by his estimation.
Rafael blinked. “Are you making fun of me again?”
He shook his head. “No. I’m not.”
Awkward silence descended once again. I shouldn’t have said
anything. The thought did him little good now, considering Rafael
now kept glancing at him like he had grown another head or
something.
Cody cleared his throat. “So what are you going to do if you find
the wolf you’re looking for?”
His work seemed like a subject Rafael was more comfortable
talking about because he instantly brightened. “I hope I can establish
some sort of communication with him. The other member of the
Forgotten that I came into contact with some centuries ago was able
to retain his human intelligence in animal form like any other shifter.
If I can convince him to give me his story, his experience, even a date
for the next time he will be in human form, I can use that to open the
academic community up to these types of shifters. According to the
old legends, bears, eagles, wolves, and mountain lions were the
species affected. If we have Nightkin running around in those forms,
unable to shift back, we may be able to enact additional protections
for them.”
It seemed like the nymph really did want to dig into the subject for
a purely academic interest. Over time Cody had seen many people
claim they wanted to help his kind only to exploit them in the end. It
was surprising to see anthropologists studying Nightkin at all. Times
certainly had changed in the past twenty-five years.
Cody pushed himself to his feet.
“What are you doing? I thought you said we had to stay hidden?”
Rafael asked, looking up at him.
“Well, you have what you came for, so there really is no reason to
stay,” Cody said, shrugging. “And I really am getting hungry, so you
want to get out here?”
30
Jana Downs
Rafael shot up, fury evident in his expression. “Do you think this
is some kind of game? This is my life and livelihood, and I do not
appreciate you making fun of me and leading me on a wild-goose
chase.”
Cody chuckled. He couldn’t help it. Rafael was rather adorable
when he was pissed. “I don’t think this is some kind of game, but I
wanted to make sure you weren’t shady.” Having always had a flair
for the dramatic, Cody bowed with a flourish. “It’s your lucky day,
Rafael. I’m the Nightkin you’ve been looking for.”
His companion’s eyes got as big as saucers. “You’re one of the
Forgotten?”
“Yep. Sure am.” He straightened to his full height and glanced
around the clearing. “So which parking lot did you park your car in?
I’m assuming you’re not the camping type.”
Wolf at the Door
31
Chapter Three
Rafael stared at his newfound companion, stunned. He’d expected
this trip to be a little bit of a wild-goose chase to begin with. It
seemed fate was smiling on him because Cody being in human form
meant he didn’t have to spend another second in these godforsaken
woods. Still, suspicion tampered his enthusiasm.
“Can you prove it?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest as
Cody sniffed the air like the animal he really was. He blatantly ignore
Cody’s question. There was no way he was going to tell the man
where his vehicle was if he was being dishonest. Over the course of
the past hour or so Cody had been both incredibly irritating and
somewhat charming intermittently. If he were teasing again, Rafael
wasn’t falling for it.
“Can I prove what? That I’m a Wolf-shifter?”
Rafael nodded.
Cody laughed. “No, not really. During my six-month hiatus I can’t
shift back. I’m stuck in human form until the winter solstice. Since
my Sentinel didn’t show up for whatever reason, I can’t even verify
my story.”
Just the fact that he knew during the six-month stints that the
Forgotten couldn’t assume their animal forms lent some credibility to
Cody’s claim. “My car is parked in A lot. I have no idea what trail
that’s off of.”
The wolf nodded like it made sense and headed back toward the
thicker part of forest before circling around the clearing. Rafael stared
in confusion before hurrying to catch up. He didn’t understand why
they hadn’t just walked through the clearing as opposed to around it.
32
Jana Downs
“Are you sure you know where we’re going?”
Cody shot him a look that was highly amused. “Considering how
long I’ve been in these woods, trust me, I know where we’re going.”
“Why didn’t we just cut through?”
“And spook the herd? No thanks. My wolves are still hunting, and
I don’t want to scatter their prey before they get here.”
The consideration for the other animals gave him pause. Cody
didn’t strike him as particularly thoughtful. Of course, that could have
to do with the fact that it seemed where Rafael was concerned he had
no filter and no concept that in polite society it was rude to point out
and then make fun of other people’s attributes and clothing.
“So are you one of the original members of the Forgotten?” Rafael
asked. He wished he would’ve brought his notepad with him. It
wasn’t very convenient to try and type and walk at the same time. In
theory he could have scribbled and walked. Hindsight was not very
beneficial.
“Nope.”
Possibilities swirled through Rafael’s mind. “So this is a
generational curse? Is it passed down father to son or mother to
daughter or how does that work?”
“I’m starving. Are you starving? After you give me some clothes,
do you think we could run through a drive-thru or something? The
idea of a hamburger and a Coke is really appealing right now.” Cody
ducked under a low-hanging limb and disappeared around the corner
of the tree. Rafael followed, managing to smack himself in the face
with said limb despite his attempts to avoid it.
Thank God for my protective clothing. If that would have gone in
his mouth he would have dissolved into hysterics. “Are you going to
answer any of my questions?”
Cody shrugged. “I said I would take you to the Nightkin. I didn’t
say I would get him to answer you.”
Rafael rolled his eyes. “Why are you talking in third person? That
is extremely annoying. I’d really like to ask you some questions.
Wolf at the Door
33
There’s no telling how long it would take me to find another
Nightkin, forget one that has the sort of firsthand knowledge that you
do.”
The compliment didn’t appear to sway him. “We’ll see. I was
always told to keep the ancestors’ secrets where it pertained to our
punishment.”
Rafael nearly growled in frustration. To be this close to a real
breakthrough for his paper and be unable to persuade Cody to
cooperate would be the ultimate disappointment. “I can pay you.”
There wasn’t much left of the grant money he received, but he was
more than willing to part with it in order to get the answers he sought.
Cody’s gaze cut over toward him. “I don’t want your money. I
would be very grateful if you lent me enough for some clothes and a
burger, but I can pay you back just as soon as I find my Sentinel.”
“What’s a Sentinel?”
“Our guardians. They help us adjust to the time period and,
hopefully, find someone we want to claim.”
“I would really like to document this process,” Rafael said, hoping
he was keeping enough of his desperation out of his voice.
“I bet you would,” Cody said. “I’ll have to think about it.”
Asking was not getting anywhere, so Rafael fell silent,
contemplating what it would take to get Cody to say yes. A couple
possibilities ran through his mind, and all of them involved him
playing nice until Cody gave up the goods, so to speak. He would
clothe him, feed him, and give him a place to stay if necessary, and
hopefully that would contribute to Cody opening up and sharing about
the incredible academic wonder that was his curse.
“So, how did you end up doing field research?” Cody asked as
they trudged along.
Rafael knew that establishing a give and take with Cody was of
paramount importance when establishing a relationship, especially a
working relationship. However, it was still uncomfortable for him to
34
Jana Downs
share with a near stranger about aspects of his life. It was hypocritical,
he knew, but he really needed this research.
“The professor who is overseeing my thesis project recommended
I add field research in to give more validity to my argument.”
“That’s not really what I meant. What I mean is, why are you
specifically doing field research? Don’t you academics typically have
underlings doing this sort of reconnaissance crap?” Cody winked at
him. “No offense, but you really don’t look like the outdoors type.”
He really wasn’t the outdoors type. In fact, he was the anti-
outdoors type. There was nothing he really hated more than germs
and nature. Holing up in his extremely immaculate townhouse was a
comfort that enabled him to function like a real person as opposed to
being enslaved by his paranoia and plethora of OCD triggers.
“I wanted it done right,” he said. That was true. He had wanted
everything done right, and he hadn’t trusted anyone else to give the
subject the level of professionalism it deserved. “I’ve been working
on this project for almost seven years now. There is no way I would
let anybody else muck it up.”
Cody nodded. “Makes sense.”
They stepped onto one of the trails that circled the park. The only
reason Rafael knew was because nailed to a nearby tree was a list of
mileages of each of the trails and a map that displayed the “you are
here” signage that most tourists relied on.
“Oh thank God,” Rafael muttered. He could’ve kissed Cody for
putting him back near civilization. Everything in the forest looked the
exact same to him, so stumbling across anything familiar was a
definite comfort.
Cody chuckled, brushing their shoulders together as they began
walking on the man-made trail path. “I would suggest next time you
take off into the woods get a guide or something. The Appalachian
Mountains run through several states and are pretty isolated in large
swaths. Getting lost in the forest is not such a good idea.”
Wolf at the Door
35
Lucky him, he found both what he was looking for and a way out.
“Thank you,” he said, offering the man a somewhat sheepish smile.
“You’re welcome.” Cody didn’t miss a beat as he reached out and
took Rafael’s hand and pressed a kiss to the glove-covered knuckles
there.
Blush rose unexpectedly to his cheeks. He couldn’t remember a
time when touch had been particularly pleasurable or when he’d been
so casually flirted with. “You’re very odd.” He hadn’t meant to say it,
but it seemed his thoughts were escaping out of his mouth.
“Don’t I know it.” Cody didn’t seem particularly bothered by the
notion. “Most of my kind are killing themselves to break the curse,
but I really don’t mind. Is it a pain in the ass? Sure. But there is an
infinite level of joy to be found in our feral forms. Plus, it’s not like I
haven’t had meaning in my life.” He nodded toward the thicker wood.
“My pack gives me a sense of family. I’m an orphan when I’m on two
legs. It’s nice to be valued by them. How about you?”
Thoughts of his own family were enough to keep him up with
nightmares. He came from old blood, and that meant there were
certain expectations attached to being a member of that family. His
hands started shaking like they normally did when he was reminded
of where he came from. He curled them into fists in an attempt to hide
them. “I think I would’ve preferred to be an orphan,” he admitted.
“I’m the black sheep of the family. Lucky for me they live in Europe
and rarely if ever get into contact with me.”
In fact, they hadn’t been in contact with him for over eleven years
if he recalled correctly. He actually had a life and a livelihood that
made him very happy. Despite what outsiders may have thought of
his oddities, his mental problems were actually better now than they
ever had been.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Cody said, sympathy filling his gaze. “I
didn’t mean to bring up a painful subject. I was just trying to make
conversation.”
36
Jana Downs
Rafael shrugged. “No big deal.” It wasn’t like he still cried into
his pillow over it. To be honest he hadn’t done that since he was still a
kid under his parents’ thumb. A cascade of memories started that he
just had to mentally whitewash as he lived through it one more time.
He’d been four the time he’d rescued a grasshopper from the kitchen
before someone could come along and squish it. His father caught
him playing with it in his room. He shuddered. He could still hear the
cold, unfeeling rage that had saturated Father’s voice as he’d accused
Rafael of being a filthy little animal. He’d squished the grasshopper
and smeared the remains over Rafael’s face before ordering him to
clean himself up. Rafael had scrubbed his face for hours until the skin
had given way and turned the washcloth pink.
Cody reached out and grabbed Rafael’s shoulder. “Hey, you
okay?”
It was then that he realized he was breathing much too hard.
Reining himself in wasn’t an easy task, but he managed after a few
breathing exercises. “Yes,” he murmured, embarrassed. “I’m fine.
Sorry. Got caught up in something.”
The shifter gave him an awkward pat on the back. “Okay.” He
turned and headed back up the trail. “Is your place far?”
Rafael jogged to catch up. “Not really, no. Only about thirty
minutes.”
“Ah so you’re over by the university?”
“Kind of.” He was in a set of townhouses right down the road
from the university that was tucked beside an elementary school and a
wide open field. “I don’t really have anything that will fit you at my
place.” He hadn’t really thought about that when he’d agreed to clothe
Cody.
“Not even an oversized T-shirt or something?” Cody asked,
worrying his bottom lip. Rafael couldn’t imagine wandering around in
this world without so much as a stitch of clothing to use.
“There is a Walmart right down from the university. We can stop
there first before we head on to my place.” It wouldn’t be the most
Wolf at the Door
37
fashionable clothing choice if Cody was into designer names, but it
was where Rafael bought most of his clothes and they held up all
right.
Cody smiled. “I appreciate that. Last time I was here I was a
thirty-four waist, thirty-eight inseam. But if you can’t find anything
that tall just go ahead and get me a pair shorts. It’s warm enough.”
The man probably had a rough time finding pants that were long
enough. Most of his height was in his legs. Rafael imagined he’d had
to employ a tailor a time or two.
Just then they crested the hill and the dirt path turned to concrete.
Rafael had never been so happy to see asphalt in his entire life. If he’d
been alone he would’ve run over and hugged the black artificial rock
like it was a life preserver in an ocean and he was overboard.
However, on second thought, God only knew how many people had
walked in and out of these woods via that asphalt. His nose wrinkle at
the thought.
His MINI Coop wasn’t exactly going to be an easy ride for Cody
with his long legs, but it was at least a ride. He resisted the urge to
apologize for his vehicle. It was something he’d worked long hours to
save up for, and it wasn’t his fault that compacts were not made to
accommodate someone of Cody stature.
“I’m guessing you didn’t drive the Dodge Durango?” Cody asked,
a hopeful note in his voice.
Rafael shook his head. “No.” He waved toward his blue-and-
white-striped vehicle. “It’ll be a tight squeeze but—”
“No. It’s great. I wasn’t complaining,” Cody interrupted. “It’s
going to be a tight fit, but I really appreciate the ride.”
“Enough to participate in this little study?” Rafael asked, looking
for some sort of confirmation.
Cody laughed. “You’re really serious about the study of yours,
huh?” He winked at him. “I will agree to answer five questions for
this service, to be renegotiated after I have food and clothing. All
right? Good enough?”
38
Jana Downs
Rafael nodded, hastily agreeing to whatever smidgen of
information Cody was willing to part with. This was research gold,
and he wouldn’t resent having limited access when he’d originally
thought that he would have none at all.
As they approached the vehicle, Rafael pulled off his mask and
headgear, happy to be able to shrug off the oppressive layers. While it
wasn’t staggeringly hot per se, it was quite warm underneath all the
mesh.
“Whoa,” Cody said, surprise flickering in his expression. “You’re
really beautiful.” He laughed like he was embarrassed by what he
said. “What I mean is, I didn’t see how attractive you really were until
you took the hood off.”
Rafael wasn’t oblivious to the fact that he was almost ethereally
beautiful. It was a family trait and one he had no choice about.
However, it brought in more aggravation than anything else. People
who were prone to being fairy struck tended to run up and touch him,
which understandably led to more than a few meltdowns on campus.
Others, once they figured out he wasn’t nearly as suave or as perfect
as he looked, wanted to use him for sex or had no interest in him after
he had a freak-out over being touched.
He cleared his throat, uncomfortable. “Thank you, I think.” He
hoped that noticing Rafael’s looks didn’t mean that Cody was getting
any nefarious ideas. Rafael didn’t do relationships. He didn’t do
touching. He certainly didn’t do sex. He had nothing to offer someone
and had so many quirks that it was almost impossible to imagine
anyone thinking he was worth the trouble.
“You’re welcome,” Cody said, circling the Coop to get to the
passenger side. “I haven’t ridden in a vehicle in years. I’ve seen the
new ones from the visitors that come to the park but riding was never
really an option.”
Just like that, the awkwardness of the moment before was
obliterated. As if Cody knew that the subject was uncomfortable for
him and moved on deliberately. He’s like a thoughtful ninja, all
Wolf at the Door
39
sneaky about his thoughtfulness. Where at first Rafael had been really
annoyed with his bluntness, now he was seeing there was more to
Cody than that.
“I can see if I can borrow my professor’s car. His is a lot bigger
than mine and I’m sure if it was for the study he’d let me, no
problem.” Claymore was always after him to let him borrow Rafael’s
Coop. If he offered to trade with him for a few days, the man would
probably do a happy dance.
He met Cody’s crystalline eyes over the hood of Rafael’s car. “If
you like. If you don’t, I’ll make do. I’m not all that difficult, I
promise.”
“How is your Sentinel going to find you?” Rafael asked as he hit
the unlock button on his keys.
“I’m going to try to call once we get to your house. Sentinels keep
the same landlines year after year. He probably just got held up or
something.” Cody didn’t look so sure though. Worry tugged on the
edges of his lips like the insistent niggle of doubt.
“I’m sure that’s all it is,” Rafael said, offering him a reassuring
smile. “If you want, once we get off this mountain, you’re welcome to
use my cell phone.”
Cody looked puzzled by that. “Sure. Okay.”
It dawned on Rafael that it had been twenty-five years since Cody
had been in the human world. He wouldn’t really understand the wide
use of advanced technologies that were in practice at the moment. It
had been just starting to take off when Cody had resumed his wolf
form.
“If you have any questions about anything just let me know. I’ll
be more than happy to help you out until your Sentinel gets here.”
The voice of doubt in the back of his head that was always present
decided to pick that moment to pipe up and make its presence known.
How are you going to look after him? You can’t even look after
yourself.
40
Jana Downs
That much was true, but he’d been doing all right since coming
here. He was largely independent and—still stuck in your house
ninety percent of the time. Do you have enough hand sanitizer to get
through Walmart?
He gripped the steering wheel hard. The last thing he wanted to
listen to was his father’s voice in the back of his head, telling him
what a screwup he was. He was going to get through this and he was
going to go into Walmart and get some clothes for Cody and he
wasn’t going to freak out. The voice of doubt could just shut up. This
research and the subject were too important to him to screw up
because of his anxiety.
* * * *
Cody somehow managed to wedge himself into the passenger side
of the car, but it wasn’t an easy task. Not that he’d tell Rafael that.
The man was doing him a favor even if he was getting something out
of it. He could’ve just as easily left Cody in the woods to hike out and
find help on his own. For all his grumpiness, the guy was actually
pretty nice.
His eyes kept wandering over to the driver’s side, mostly of their
own accord because gods knew that Cody commanded them to stop
staring at his pretty companion. He’d been struck by his beauty
before, but without the bee-keeping headdress he was downright
striking. The urge to reach out and touch that alabaster skin to see if it
was as soft as it looked was an impulse that was surprisingly difficult
to control. Cody rarely felt like he was the least attractive man in the
room but next to this beautiful, awkward man he was downright
homely.
He pulled down the sun visor to look at himself in the mirror. He
winced. He really shouldn’t have. He was covered in dirt and more
than a little frayed looking. Though his skin was a nice olive
complexion, all the dirt smudges made him look like he had been a
Wolf at the Door
41
pig wallowing in mud. His coal-black hair with the single stripe of
gray at his right temple was tangled with nettles and twigs from the
brush.
“Do you happen to have a shower at your place I could use?”
Normally he wouldn’t care so much, but he was Rafael’s guest and
the man didn’t strike him as overly eager when it came to things like
messes. “I’ll clean it afterward if you like.”
Rafael’s hand tightened on the steering wheel. “I have a shower
you can use. Don’t worry about cleaning it. I’ll do that after.”
“I can do it.” Cody didn’t want to be a bad houseguest even if it
was only for a few hours.
Rafael shook his head. “No.” The abrupt denial made Cody sigh.
He kept hitting Rafael’s buttons without even realizing it.
Silence reigned as they made their way down the mountain and
toward the sleepy college town beyond. Cody opened his mouth a
couple times to initiate conversation, but the disinterested look on
Rafael’s mug made him rethink his decision. It wasn’t like they had to
talk. In fact, Cody preferred the quiet most of the time, but he hated
leaving things on an awkward note.
“Here,” Rafael said suddenly, thrusting a square metal object at
him. “Go ahead and call your Sentinel if you can.”
Cody stared at the box. “Um, how do I make a call?” There were
no buttons. He flipped it over. Nope. Definitely no buttons. He
crinkled the edges. And it was covered in a plastic film.
Rafael busted out laughing, his gaze cutting over to Cody. “I’m
sorry. I didn’t think. It’s a touch screen.”
“Dear gods, I wasn’t gone a hundred years. How much can shit
change?” Rafael tapped the screen, and it turned on like a TV.
“Where is the number pad?”
They turned off the exit and onto a narrower road. “I’ll get it as
soon as we park,” Rafael said.
Cody nodded, feeling like a Grade A loser for not understanding
this new world. Russell usually took care of all of this before he
42
Jana Downs
turned him out on polite society. He took his mind off his frustration
by taking in the sights. A lot had changed since he’d been gone. The
historical district had been cleaned up and fast food restaurants had
popped up along the road leading toward the college. Five minutes
later they pulled into the Walmart parking lot, another new addition to
the town.
The tiny Coop came to a stop in one of the clearly delineated
parking spaces. Rafael plucked the phone from his fingers and did
something to the phone. “What’s the number?” Rafael asked.
Cody rattled off the number, which Rafael plugged in without
preamble. As it rang, he handed it over to Cody, who did a few more
seconds of confused staring before he figured out how to hold it
properly. He got Russell’s voice mail and left a message for him to
call back at this number. He fumbled with the end call button before
finally handing it back to Rafael with a growl.
“No luck?” Rafael asked as he ended the call for him.
He shook his head. “I guess not. You mind if I hold onto your
phone while you go in?”
“You can.” He pointed toward the dash. “Wipe it down with the
Clorox wipes in the glove box after you’re done.” He showed Cody
how to illuminate the phone. “If he calls back just tap the green button
that pops up.”
Cody blinked. “Sure…”
Rafael smiled. “Don’t forget the Clorox wipes. I’ll be right back
so you can have some—” He cut himself off as his gaze snagged on
Cody’s lap.
Cody frowned. “What?”
Rafael’s face went scarlet. “Um, nothing.” He rolled out of the car
so fast that Cody could’ve sworn his ass was on fire.
He glanced down. His dick was hanging out.
“Whoops.”
Wolf at the Door
43
Chapter Four
He’d never been embarrassed about his body before, but the look
on Rafael’s face as he’d stared openly at Cody’s exposed junk was
enough to incite a flamethrower sensation all over his face. Rafael had
seemed to feel the same way because he vacated the car pretty soon
after Cody readjusted his leaf skirt. Christ.
The phone rang with a blocked number on it.
At least the stupid phone illuminated the green button and said
“answer.” He tapped the button.
“Hello?”
“You are not to speak to the researcher.”
Cody blinked. “Who is this?”
“Rafael, you will not speak to the Forgotten.”
“Excuse me?”
“You’ve been warned.”
The phone beeped as the call was ended.
“Weird,” Cody murmured, a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach.
Something was wrong. He just had no way of getting in touch with
whoever sent out the Sentinels. In fact, he knew nothing about where
the Sentinels came from. If Russell was in some kind of trouble, there
was nothing he could do. Helplessness didn’t suit him in the least bit.
Cody was a man of action. Period and end of story.
The door opened on the driver side, and he jumped, his heart
pounding like a drum beat at a rock concert. He let out the breath he’d
been holding between his teeth as he got a good look at his would-be
attacker.
44
Jana Downs
“You scared me,” he admitted as Rafael ducked back into the car,
a couple of bags in hand. “Were you able to find something for me to
wear?”
Rafael nodded as he put the bags behind his seat. “I did. They
might be a little short on you, but I think they’ll work.”
“Thank you.” For the first time since waking up in the woods, he
had the realization that he was well and truly alone.
“Are you okay?” Rafael asked, staring at him. “You look
spooked.”
Cody shrugged. “I can’t get ahold of Russell, and right after I
called his phone something weird happened. I’ve never been
completely alone since I started this whole cycle of shift and repeat.
Russell has always been there.”
“I’m sorry,” Rafael said, giving him a sympathetic look. “After
you shower and get into actual clothes, things will look better.”
He hoped so because at this point it certainly couldn’t look any
worse.
* * * *
Hot water with a ton of pressure behind the head was almost as
good as taking down a big buck during a hard winter, fucking ecstasy.
The honeysuckle and vanilla shampoo filled the air with a thick,
pleasant-smelling steam, and coupled with the cucumber-melon body
wash, his nose was in happy town. Managing to smother the acrid
smell of cleaners and bleach that clung to every surface was a miracle
in itself. Rafael had to clean everyday like it was a battle zone for the
smell to embed like that.
He wrapped the stark white towel around his hips and wiped a
hand over the fogged mirror. He grinned at his reflection. He
definitely looked better clean. A quick glance at the shower revealed
that the fiberglass surface had not fared as well. He winced. He
couldn’t leave it like that. No way.
Wolf at the Door
45
He took a few minutes to wipe the entire thing down. “There,” he
said, satisfied with his progress. “Now Mr. OCD has nothing to
complain about.” At least he hoped he didn’t.
The townhouse Rafael had taken him to was a quaint little place
on a well-manicured lot facing the incoming road. His house was one
on the end and was uniform light blue gray with a white porch. It was
identical to all the other units, but that probably suited the guy’s
preferences better than a line of buildings that were all eclectic.
The interior reminded Cody of one those old historic B&Bs where
everything was restored to museum-quality old-school elegance, and
it felt weird to smudge anything. The only difference was the fact that
there wasn’t a whole lot in Rafael’s townhouse. He was minimalist to
say the least. Cody’s former bachelor pad in the eighties would’ve
probably given him a clutter-induced panic attack. Cody tended to
accumulate a lot of stuff every time he shifted that would have to be
sold when he shifted back. Russell had shaken his head at his
collections more than once.
He opened the door into the guest room where Rafael had
deposited him. The guy clearly didn’t have many guests because the
bed was only a twin and the room looked like no one had ever stepped
foot in it. Not that Cody was complaining but it seemed to him that
Rafael was largely isolated. Cody sympathized, even if it was self-
imposed on Rafael’s part.
The Walmart bags had found their way onto the bed sometime
during his shower time. He crossed the red rug on the floor and
started extracting the clothing. He was surprised to find extra toiletries
that he hadn’t requested. A small bottle of mouthwash, dental floss,
toothbrush, comb, shaving cream, and a packet of disposable razors
were a small thing to most people, and they usually didn’t think of
them, Cody included.
Either that or the guy really wants my mouth to be clean. He
chuckled at the thought.
46
Jana Downs
A few minutes spent freshening up went a long way to making
him feel human. A stubble check on his cheek revealed that it was as
smooth as it ever got with him. Since his hair was so dark, by noon he
had a five o’clock shadow. It was just how he rolled.
He pulled on the black T-shirt that was about an inch too short on
his stomach and the pair of light-wash Levi’s Rafael had chosen. He
sat on the vastly uncomfortable bed in order to pull on his new socks
and winced as they slid onto his sore feet. Apparently walking for
hours barefoot in the woods wasn’t good for his feet. Go figure.
He put on his new shoes and deemed himself dressed.
Making his way back downstairs where he’d left Rafael, he turned
over his problem of being Sentinel-less. There had to be a protocol for
this sort of thing, but gods knew he wasn’t aware of it. The inaction
was going to kill him where Russell was concerned. The man wasn’t
just a Sentinel, he was his friend. Someone had to know something
because why else would he have gotten a strange return phone call
ordering him not to talk to “the researcher” which he could only
assume was Rafael?
A plan started to form as he descended the steps to the first level
of the townhouse, one that was mutually beneficial to both himself
and his OCD host.
“Rafael?” he called as he stepped onto the landing. He wasn’t
sitting on the plastic-covered couch like he’d assumed he would be.
“Kitchen!” Rafael said.
Cody walked the few feet from the living room into the kitchen. A
cursory glance at the space didn’t reveal the water nymph. His brows
furrowed. He did hear a weird swishing noise though. He circled the
island and found Rafael on the floor on his knees in a pair of neon-
blue rubber gloves and a face mask with a brush that was used to
wash out dishes and a yellow bucket full of the same acrid-smelling
cleaner that Cody had smelled in the bathroom.
Wolf at the Door
47
“Uh, you do know the floor is clean, right?” There wasn’t a speck
of dirt in the entire townhouse, but he wasn’t going to blow Rafael’s
mind with that revelation just yet.
Rafael’s gaze didn’t rise from the floor. “Actually, it isn’t. It was,
but you left footprints everywhere when you came in so I have to
decontaminate the entire space. I don’t know where the germs might
have traveled. God only knows what you stepped in out there.”
He didn’t know whether to be amused or vaguely insulted. “You
do know that as small as germs are they can’t have been travelling all
that terribly fast, right?”
Rafael snorted. “I’ve had enough biology courses in my
profession to have a good idea. Besides, I just like things to be tidy.
Do I come into your woods and tell the trees how to grow?”
Fair point. “Okay. Can I help?”
“No.”
All righty then. “Um, well, I just wanted to say thanks for the
clothes and stuff. I feel much better now.”
“Where did you put the towel?”
Cody blinked. “The towel hanger?”
Rafael immediately shook his head. “Wrong.” If anything he
started scrubbing harder. “That’s a good way to breed germs. As dirty
as you were…” He shook his head again. “No. You have to go fetch it
and put it in the washing machine. I’ll add them to the load I’m doing.
Also, can you put your skirt outside by the curb? I don’t want to leave
it in the house.”
Cody nodded because it seemed really important to the guy and he
figured if he said no Rafael might have a meltdown. They were both
slaves to something they couldn’t help, and Cody couldn’t help but
wonder if Rafael wanted to get free of his curse the same way Cody
did.
After doing as ordered, he returned to the kitchen to find Rafael
only about a foot from where he’d last been scrubbing.
“Where is the washing machine?” he asked.
48
Jana Downs
Rafael looked up in surprise, like he hadn’t even heard him come
in. Considering how much his feet echoed on the floor and the general
emptiness of the rooms, he wasn’t sure how he hadn’t. He pointed his
scrub brush at the door to his right. “Just stick it in.”
Cody nodded and crossed to the door before pulling it open and
throwing the towel in the open top-loader. “Anything else?”
“Yes. Remove your shoes. You’ve brought the outside in again.”
Cody sighed. Obeying Rafael’s dictates could get old quick.
“Where do you want me to put them?”
“Leave them in the sink in there. I’ll wash the bottoms and give
them back to you when I finish.”
“And how long is that going to take?”
“At least another two hours for the kitchen and another hour for
the bathroom,” Rafael said nonchalantly. “If I vacuum it’ll be another
two. You’re welcome to go watch some television while I finish up.”
He pointed toward the living room. “It’s tucked behind the cabinet
doors in there. The remote is there as well, along with the user
manual. I have cable.”
Somehow Cody doubted he had much time to watch it. “Do you
clean the whole house every day?”
Rafael shrugged, scrubbing the floor a little harder. “It depends on
whether or not it needs it. I usually do one room at a time, but it got
dirty today. I can’t help that. I can’t leave it. Why would anyone leave
it?”
Cody held up his hands in surrender. “Okay, man. You rock on. I
need to talk to you when you finish.”
Rafael nodded.
This is going to be a weird six months.
* * * *
Rafael peeled off his rubber gloves and threw them in the trash,
satisfied with his work but no closer to figuring out what he was
Wolf at the Door
49
supposed to do with the Nightkin in his living room. He didn’t have
people over, ever. He had a guest room because he had an extra room
and that was what the room was for. However, no one ever used it.
For some reason getting the image of Cody’s exposed body out of
his mind wasn’t happening either, so now he was equal parts aroused
and repulsed by Cody’s presence here. He didn’t know how to deal
with that. His emotions were usually pretty aligned, decisive. He
sighed. What is wrong with me? I can interact like any other adult.
Sort of.
He’d been surprised Cody was willing to indulge him as much as
he had. Most people got fed up with him a lot quicker. Of course, it
could’ve been due to the fact that Cody was in desperate straits.
Rafael desperately wanted to believe that Cody always had that much
patience though.
He washed his hands with soap and then put on some hand
sanitizer. Whatever attraction that Cody had when he’d seen Rafael in
the parking lot was probably long gone by now. Not that it mattered.
It was all Rafael could do to masturbate. Forget sexual intercourse.
The few times he’d tried had been utter disasters. When he’d first
come from Europe, he’d thought one of the ways he could break ties
to his old life was to become sexually active. Clearly, that hadn’t
worked out for him.
So why in the name of all the lords of the underworld was he
thinking about Cody’s body and becoming aroused by it? It had even
been dirty! Why his traitorous cock picked now to be uncaring of said
germ infestation was anyone’s guess.
“You finished?” Cody asked as Rafael came into the living room.
Rafael shifted from foot to foot. “Yes.” He was in his chair. That
was his side of the couch. He sat there every day. He took a deep
breath and perched on the recliner he’d bought on a whim six months
ago. It wasn’t his chair, but it would do in a pinch. “Thank you for
cleaning the upstairs bathroom.” Not that he’d done a great job but
50
Jana Downs
he’d tried. It counted for something. Most people wouldn’t have
bothered.
Cody smiled at him. “No problem. I tried to call Russell again. No
answer.” His smile faded at the admission. He clearly cared about his
Sentinel, and though Rafael had no practical experiences with deep
friendships, he understood the concept. The closest he’d come was
Claymore, and that was more of a work relationship. “I have a
proposal for you.”
“Oh?” This would be interesting to hear. “Beyond your offer of
the five questions?”
Cody nodded. “Yep. If you put me up and help me find Russell, I
will participate in your study and do whatever you need for your
paper. Is that fair?”
He found himself nodding before he really thought of it. His
internal demons whimpered in fear of the germs that would inevitably
follow, but, for once, Rafael ignored them. This was too important to
him to allow his compulsions to run the show. Meals, housing, and a
little research were small prices to pay in the face of what the world
could learn about people like Cody.
“I think we can come to an arrangement.”
Are you insane? There is no way you’ll be able to handle someone
in your space for twenty-four hours, forget a week or ten days. You’ll
end up back in the bathtub. He winced at the thought. When his
compulsions were too much, he retreated to the master suite, filled up
the tub, and became one with the water for hours on end. He was
essentially paralyzed until he managed to calm his panicked mind
down.
I can do this. Cody is thoughtful and—
Bound to be less tolerant over time.
Shut. Up.
“Sweet,” Cody said, oblivious to the internal argument Rafael was
having with his demons. “You just let me know your rules and I will
make sure that I follow them. I’ll try not to be a bad house guest.”
Wolf at the Door
51
That was actually a very sweet thing to say. “Thank you. People
will tolerate me in small doses, but I can be frustrating.”
“It must be hard for people to understand,” Cody said, sympathy
in his gaze. “I get it. Most people don’t understand my whole
connection to the wolf pack either. Considering how much Nightkin
pride themselves on not being human, it’s funny how I never quite
make the cut as human enough.” He smiled. “You do you and I’ll do
me and we’ll figure it out together. Cool?”
Relief filled him. “Yes. I’d like that.” The Forgotten got it. He’d
never been even remotely understood. It was a singularly freeing
experience. He popped out of the chair. “I owe you food.”
“You do,” Cody agreed. “But how about you let me cook? I
promise to even do dishes afterward.”
He gave an apologetic smile. “I don’t have any food here. I order
in most nights or I eat at this café on campus that has an A-plus rating
that’s right near the library.”
Cody tilted his head to the side. “How do you deal with the
library? A bunch of dusty old books can’t help your OCD.” He
paused. “Is it OCD?” His curiosity was oddly endearing.
Rafael shrugged. “Compulsive disorder coupled by high anxiety.
It’s actually gotten better since I moved to the States. My therapist
keeps pushing me to try new things. That’s what school was supposed
to be. My new thing.” He chuckled. “Now it’s a part of my routine
and I really found a passion for it.”
“That’s cool. A lot of people don’t work on their issues. Not that
your thing is an issue,” he hurried to correct himself. “I just mean that
it can’t be easy in a world that isn’t always neat and tidy.”
“I don’t take offense. It is an issue, but I’m working on it.” It was
a huge step for someone like him to work past all the things that stood
in his way of a “normal” life. Hell, his life would probably never be
completely normal, but he could manage his compulsions with
enough time and enough space between himself and his triggers.
52
Jana Downs
“You’re very cool, Rafael,” Cody said. “I dig your whole Zen
thing.”
Rafael chuckled. He didn’t know he had a whole “Zen” thing.
Most of the time he was anything but “Zen.” A subject change was in
order. “I’d like for you to meet my professor. He and another of his
colleagues at Oklahoma University, Professor Flint, are overseeing
my project.”
“You want to parade me in front of your college professor?”
“Not parade exactly. I’d like him to meet you so he can give me
some advice on how to approach the study. Interviewing you is
wonderful and incredibly helpful for my paper. However, there might
be some biological factors that we haven’t thought of yet.” Academia
was his comfort zone. He could nerd talk all day long. “I mean, if you
want we can explore those options. They have some great professors
here that might be interested in some research of their own.”
“No,” Cody said, frowning. “I don’t want to turn into a science
experiment. I’m good with being an interviewee and I’m good with
jumping through some minor hoops for you but no blood, no
machines, no science projects.”
“Okay. I guess that’s fair.” He would’ve hated being poked and
prodded himself. “I promise to keep it purely a documentation
process.”
Cody nodded. “Cool.”
“We can grab some food at that café if you like or we could do
Chinese food.” Either choice was good for Rafael.
“Sounds good.”
“I’ll go grab your shoes.” He turned toward the kitchen, intent on
fetching the shoes he’d spent the last twenty minutes scrubbing.
“Wait for a second,” Cody called, making him stop.
He turned back. “Yes?”
“How are we going to go about finding Russell?”
Duh. He should’ve anticipated that question. He’d just gotten so
excited about Cody agreeing to the study that he’d momentarily
Wolf at the Door
53
forgotten about all the rest. “Oh! Sorry! I should’ve mentioned that
Professor Claymore has a couple of contacts at the local PD. He can
probably point us in their direction. Maybe we can even hook up with
the Nightkin division.”
Cody nodded. “Cool. I just wanted to make sure that we were on
the same page as far as all that was concerned.”
Rafael smiled. “Yes of course. I’m sorry I didn’t mention it
before.” He turned around and made his way back to the laundry
room where he’d left Cody’s new shoes.
“So do you always wash the bottoms of your shoes when you
come in and out?” Cody asked from the living room.
“Yes,” Rafael said. Didn’t everyone?
54
Jana Downs
Chapter Five
“Well, I’ll be damned,” Claymore said, shaking Cody’s hand.
“You found your needle in a haystack, huh, Rafael?”
Rafael tried not to beam like an idiot at the compliment. His short
explanation hadn’t summed up the excitement he felt at the prospect
of having a living member of the Forgotten in human form and
willing to participate in his study for his paper, but Claymore
apparently understood perfectly.
He settled for, “I am pleasantly surprised.”
“We appreciate your assistance in this study,” Claymore added,
squeezing Cody’s hand firmly. “And don’t worry. We’ll help you find
your friend and make this a satisfactory relationship for everyone.”
“I hope so,” Cody said, releasing his hand. “Rafael has been really
kind since we stumbled across one another. It’s nice to meet you.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you as well,” Claymore said. He waved to
the chairs in front of his desk. “Go ahead and sit down. Would you
care for a drink?”
“No thanks.”
“Rafael?”
“You know I don’t drink, Claymore,” Rafael said, perching on the
edge of his seat. His office had not gotten any less crowded and
messy in the days since he’d seen it. He resisted the urge to straighten
the paper pile nearest his foot.
“Right. Right. I’d forgotten.” His focus was completely on Cody.
Rafael didn’t get annoyed with him over it. There wasn’t a point. He
wanted his overseer to be as excited as he was about the prospect of
Wolf at the Door
55
Rafael’s study. “So, Cody, I understand your friend was supposed to
pick you up after you shifted?”
Cody nodded. “Yes. He never showed. It’s not like him to leave
me to my own devices after a return to humanity, and he has all my
personal information on him. Bank accounts, everything that I could
need for the next six months, he’s in charge of everything.”
Claymore nodded. “Then it is of paramount importance that you
find him.” He opened his top drawer on his desk. He extracted a card.
“This is one of the officers at the sheriff’s office that I’ve had dealings
with in the past. He’s a good place to start. I’ll be more than happy to
put you up at my place. My wife and I would love to have you.”
Rafael bit into his bottom lip. On one hand, Rafael would be a
little relieved that he wouldn’t have to worry about picking up after
someone in his house after all, but he was, oddly, much more
disappointed at the prospect of not being able to have constant
interaction with Cody.
“No thanks,” Cody said before Rafael could voice his opinion.
“Rafael and I have an understanding already in place.”
“Oh?” Claymore’s gaze cut over to Rafael. “You’re actually going
to let someone into your palace?”
The quip annoyed him more than it usually did. “We’ve already
been there, and I have him settled into my guest room.” Not entirely
true but true enough to count. He had put linens on the bed.
Claymore looked impressed, which just pissed him off more. “I’m
assuming you’re going to be feeding him and whatnot as well?”
He nodded.
“I’ll make sure I get you a check from the grant fund for
expenses.”
“Thank you,” Rafael said. He had been going to bring it up
anyway, but this was much better. Claymore trusted him to allocate
the funds accordingly.
Claymore nodded. “Sure.” He flicked his eyes over to Cody. “I’d
really love to get our interns to get working on the background
56
Jana Downs
information for Rafael’s research. Do you mind if I take down your
full name, date of birth, and place of birth?”
Cody shrugged. “Sure. It’s Cody Ambrewster. My birthday is
April 29, 1838. I was born at home in Forest Park, Virginia.”
He was older than Rafael had originally thought. Cody was
nowhere near as old as Rafael was, but his energy was even younger
than Rafael perceived. Interesting.
His professor jotted down notes on a Post-it. Inevitably it would
get lost in his pile of papers. If it made it to the interns, they would be
extremely lucky. Rafael internally cringed.
“Thanks for seeing us, Claymore,” Rafael said, pushing himself
up. “I’ll give you a call tomorrow to schedule an interview time where
we can set up a video and whatnot.”
“Good idea,” Claymore said. “I’ll contact Professor Flint today
and let him know what we’re doing. He’s going to be interested to see
what we accomplish, I’m sure.”
Rafael nodded. “Food and then a phone call to the sheriff’s
office?”
“Sounds great.”
Cody got up and followed him to the door.
Claymore waved at them. “Have a good time, gentlemen.”
What was that supposed to mean?
As they got out of the office and into the main walkway in
Stillwell Hall, Cody bumped their shoulders.
Rafael’s eyes widened as he stumbled. “Why did you do that?”
Cody reached out to steady him. “Sorry. I was just playing
around. I thought that went well.”
“It did.” Rafael shrugged off his hands and pulled a fresh pair of
gloves from his pockets for the elevator. “Sorry. I just don’t usually
kid around like you’re used to.”
“I didn’t think. It was my bad. You don’t have to apologize for
doing your normal thing.” Cody smiled, and Rafael’s heart skipped a
beat. He was incredibly handsome, but he also had a charisma about
Wolf at the Door
57
him that was just as pulling. Rafael didn’t normally notice those sorts
of things but with Cody it was impossible not to.
“Um, thank you.” That was all he could manage. He wished he
could be normal for five minutes. He wished he could tell Cody flat
out that he found him attractive and ask him out on a real date. But
the idea of kissing was equal parts repulsive and desirous. His
weirdness was ridiculously intrinsic at this point.
I do not find him attractive.
Lying to himself seemed like the most logical course of action. It
wasn’t like it could go anywhere, and Cody hadn’t shown any bit of
interest since the parking lot in the park. Like most people who met
him, the attraction was brief.
He led them to the café that was attached to the library, passing
students and faculty as they navigated the busy sidewalk toward their
destination.
Though the campus was small, it had charm that brought to mind
its original inception back in 1889 with a central clock tower, stone
buildings, and old trees preserved rather than paved over among the
structures. Even the newer-built sections kept with the aesthetics,
which Rafael appreciated. It wasn’t antique by his measure, but it
called to mind a bygone era nonetheless. Mostly, the feeling of a
small community persevered, which made it a treasure, especially for
a public university.
He sidestepped a gentleman who looked like his mind was a
million miles away. His tap dancing had gotten superior over the
course of his education here. He managed to dodge all the people
without being touched, so he was considering the trip a win.
“You walk insanely fast,” Cody said, jogging to catch up. “I’m a
half a foot taller than you and you outpace me like the Energizer
Bunny.”
“Don’t like crowds,” he muttered, a little embarrassed. “You ever
notice that people touch all the time?”
58
Jana Downs
Cody winked. “I do, but I am an animal, Raf. I don’t mind being
naked or touching or getting a little bit dirty.”
“Clearly.” He didn’t mean it to sound like he was cringing, but it
came out that way. His flirtation was pitiful at best. He tripped over a
pit in the sidewalk and nearly tumbled over. For the second time
today, Cody righted him. “I’m sorry. I’m not normally so clumsy.” He
wasn’t paying as much attention as he normally did.
Cody pulled him closer as a group of people pushed past in a
hurry, shielding Rafael from the onslaught. Surprise rippled through
him. He breathed in the wild scent of wolf and man along with the
enticing scent of Cody’s own unique fragrance. Cody’s heat scorched
him through his clothes and his body responded by hardening his
cock. He stared up at the other Nightkin, unable to move as Cody held
him close.
The crowd moved on, but Cody didn’t let go. Instead he leaned
down and sniffed along the line of Rafael’s neck. “You smell
fantastic,” Cody murmured.
Rafael couldn’t speak, couldn’t even breathe as his body
vacillated between desire and terror. The desire was turning his mind
to mush, coming out ahead of the fear.
Just as abruptly, Cody let him go, a playful look on his face.
“You’re safe now, nymph. Time to feed me.”
Eating. Food. Right. He glanced at his crotch, praying his dick
wasn’t tenting his pants. It wasn’t. Thank God.
He nodded, commanding himself not to blush like a teenager on a
first date.
It was only after they opened the door to the café that he realized
that he hadn’t dissolved into a freak-out over their interaction. He
hadn’t even needed hand sanitizer. He whipped his head toward
Cody, staring at him under his lashes.
Oh hell. I’ve got a crush on him.
* * * *
Wolf at the Door
59
Cody tried to shrug off the awareness that crept up his spine as he
had embraced his host. The smell under all the cleaners and
fragrances from various soaps and whatnots was all Rafael and very
mouthwatering. He’d waited years for someone to give him and his
animal a jolt like Rafael’s smell just had. He hadn’t expected it,
hadn’t even really contemplated it beyond the physical attraction he’d
felt, but there the animal attraction was. Hmm, I might have to see
where this goes.
He managed to pull back before things got too awkward between
them, but it wasn’t easy. He wanted to wallow in that scent. He
snickered to himself. Down boy. You don’t even know if he is
interested. It wasn’t in his nature to fight his whims. He was a person
who lived life as it came and rarely worried about the consequence. If
Rafael was any other man, Cody would’ve just slipped in the “hey,
you want to get out of here?” speech and call it a day. However,
Rafael wasn’t any other man. His anxieties and OCD made Cody
have to consider things before he did or said them. It made him more
aware of how he was interacting on a human level, which was
interesting.
The café looked just like Cody had imagined it would. Students
took up most of the tables, backpacks slung in chairs or on the tables
beside them. A row of snack machines took up the far wall, and then a
line with cold food was placed along the register counter for an easy
grab on the way to the register. The whole place smelled like
numerous coffee combinations and, oddly enough, toast from the
grilled sandwiches.
He glanced over at Rafael and caught him staring. “What?”
The man’s face was an open book. Every emotion played openly
over his expressive visage. Panic was the emotion of the moment.
“Nothing,” he squeaked. He swallowed and waved toward the menu
hanging above the register. “Food.”
60
Jana Downs
Nothing to see here, folks. Nothing at all. He chuckled. “Oh…kay.
What do you normally get?”
“Grilled ham and cheese on wheat with a side of kale chips.”
He wrinkled his nose. “If you throw in regular chips, I’m sold.”
He walked over and grabbed a blue Gatorade. “I’ll drink my meal
with one of these.” He would take Rafael out when he got access to
his bank account. It probably had a tidy sum in it now. When he’d
gone out it had twenty thousand, more than enough for another six
months, even without any interest accumulation, if he was careful
with it.
Rafael nodded. “Sounds good.” He picked out his own drink. It
was grass green, and he put them on the counter in front of the
expectant human cashier. “Two number threes, one with kale chips
and one with regular, and these drinks, please.” He handed over a card
that didn’t look like a credit card.
“What’s that?” he asked, leaning in. Cat Card. It looked like a
student ID of some kind.
“I can load money onto it instead of using my credit card
everywhere,” Rafael explained, taking his card back from the girl. “I
put some cash on it so I can use it on campus.”
“Interesting.” There was a lot of technology that he needed to
catch up on.
In no time flat, they had a tray full of food.
Cody’s stomach rumbled as the scent of food wrapped around his
gut and squeezed. His mouth watered, and he resisted the urge to lean
down onto the tray and nibble on the sandwich there.
“You want to pick a table?” he asked. He wasn’t picky, but he
imagined Rafael was.
He didn’t know why he even asked. Rafael was already heading
toward a small corner table, Clorox wipes in hand. Where he’d pulled
the travel-sized pouch of them from, he had no idea, but he stood by
as the man scrubbed the table and the two chairs. He even got the
underside of the table where their knees might touch.
Wolf at the Door
61
He smiled, tickled at the sight. “Do you do this every time?”
“I always sit at this table,” Rafael admitted. “It’s the cleanest in
the library aside from the study desk I use downstairs.”
Cody stared. He couldn’t help it. “What happens when someone is
sitting at your table?”
“I have a backup in the faculty lounge, but I feel a little
claustrophobic in there. I like it here. It makes me feel normal.” He
tossed the Clorox wipes and then dragged out his hand sanitizer,
dousing his hands with the acrid scent of alcohol.
Cody just shook his head and put the tray on the table. Their
definitions of normal were very different, but that was all right. He
was cool with not normal. “You’re funny.”
“What’s funny?” Rafael asked, looking genuinely confused. “Why
am I funny?”
Aw crap. “Nothing. No funniness here.” He took his plate and bit
into his sandwich.
Rafael’s eyes narrowed. “You don’t have to tiptoe around me. Say
what you think.”
Well, he asked for it. “I find your cleanliness equal parts
frustrating and endearing. You’re attractive and have a Grade A ass. I
also like the way you smell.” He wasn’t good at tiptoeing around
things. Human interactions were hard. Maybe he’d spent too much
time around wolves.
Rafael’s eyes were so wide by the end of the speech that Cody
was pretty sure that they were going to pop out of his skull in protest.
Cody took a bite out of his sandwich and chewed it slowly. If Rafael
was going to take offense, it was going to be after his blunt admission.
He waited for the protest, the embarrassed set down.
“Thank you.”
The softly spoken words drew his gaze to Rafael’s. Puzzled, he
stared. “For what?”
“Finding me attractive despite…you know.” Rafael’s expression
looked equal parts pained and happy. It was a very strange look.
62
Jana Downs
Apparently, Cody was destined to put two conflicting emotions on
Rafael’s face for as long as they were in acquaintance.
It annoyed the hell out of him that Rafael had learned to be so
self-conscious about his mental thing. Whoever had hurt him
deserved a good ass whipping, and Cody was the type to deliver it if
necessary. He wasn’t sure why the idea of someone dismissing Rafael
because of his OCD made him so protective, but it did.
Cody nodded, unsure of what to say to the thanks. “You’re
welcome” seemed wholly unnecessary and wrong, so he didn’t
bother.
They ate in silence, both people-watching as their sandwiches and
chips disappeared. Rafael folded up his trash as soon as he was
finished and then deposited it in a nearby waste bin. As he returned to
the table, he waved at a few people who looked like students.
Cody watched the interaction with interest. It seemed like Rafael
was well enough liked around here even if he was as nervous as a cat
up a chimney with a fire lit in the bottom. “Do you teach here as
well?” Cody asked as he rejoined him at the table.
Rafael nodded. “It’s required as a PhD candidate. I taught the
evening classes. They aren’t as full.” He shifted. “I don’t have to
worry about them now though. I’ve been given permission to focus
exclusively on you.”
A slow grin stretched Cody’s lips. “A guy could get really
bigheaded hanging around you, Raf.”
The subtle pink in Rafael’s cheeks let him know that he wasn’t
completely immune to Cody’s flirtation. “Why do you shorten my
name like that?”
Cody shrugged. “Rafael is so formal, so stick-in-the-mudish. I see
your inner Raf.” He winked. “He’s dying to get out.”
Rafael’s blush darkened. “He’s really not.”
“Maybe you’re right.” He paused. “But you did come traipsing
through the woods in search of a person you didn’t know existed.
That’s pretty adventurous for a guy who can’t even press an elevator’s
Wolf at the Door
63
call button without gloves on. I’m just sayin’. You’re much bolder
than you think you are.”
The nymph looked puzzled by that, his eyebrows lowering into an
adorable scowl. “I’m not bold. I’m scared of everything.”
Cody snorted. “You certainly weren’t scared of me.” Not once
had he detected a whiff of fear the entire time they’d been “lost” in
the woods unless it had to do with something getting on him. Then
Rafael panicked.
“I’m scared of dumb things,” Rafael amended.
“Everyone has quirks, Raf.” At Rafael’s skeptical look, Cody
smiled. The man really didn’t appreciate himself. Compared to the
men Cody usually met, i.e. the arrogant-as-hell ones who threw
themselves at Cody and demanded his attention, Rafael was a breath
of fresh air.
64
Jana Downs
Chapter Six
Weeks crawled by without word.
Officer Morrow had promised to call if anything came up or they
managed to track down Russell, but the phone hadn’t rung. It was
getting to the point now that Cody feared he was well and truly alone
this time around. Rafael had helped him get in touch with his bank so
he could get a new credit card and taught him how to access his
account online, but his tutelage wasn’t as easy to ask for.
Cody felt like a moron. Sentinels were trained to handle questions
about new modes of doing things, and it was their job to make
members of the Forgotten knowledgeable in the ever-changing world.
It was frustrating to have to bother Rafael for every little thing.
He drummed his finger on the edge of the mattress, staring at the
ceiling. He should’ve been out of bed twenty minutes ago, but he just
couldn’t see a reason to drag himself to the adjacent bathroom and
commit to showering off in order to wake up. What was he supposed
to do today? He was forgetting something.
The door to his bedroom swung open, and Rafael entered without
preamble dressed in his cleaning outfit, kneepads, rubber gloves, and
an apron. Someone was feeling overly ambitious this morning. He
glanced at the clock. Eight twenty. Yikes.
Rafael paused as he took in Cody’s bare chest and immediately
averted his eyes. “Why aren’t you dressed?”
“Are we going somewhere?”
Usually around this time he was at the little breakfast eatery down
the street, sipping coffee and chowing down on whatever was on
special. Afterward there was walking and a trip to the library. There
Wolf at the Door
65
were a lot of books published in the last twenty-five years. Or the bar.
There was always the bar and the multitude of ESPN channels
playing. He sighed happily at the thought. He had really missed his
sports channels. It was funny that he never missed much of anything
in his human life when he was in his wolf form.
He strained his memory to recall what he had promised Raf he
was doing today. “Do I have to dictate more of my history for you
today?”
Rafael shook his head. “No. We’re supposed to go up to Cherokee
so you can see your wolves, remember? We’ve been talking about it
all week.”
Understanding dawned. “Right. Sorry I completely forgot.” He
glanced at the clothes he’d failed to pick up the night before. His
abandoned underwear was in the center of the room right next to
Rafael’s foot. Some of Rafael’s OCD must’ve rubbed off on him
because he felt the urge to roll out of bed and start cleaning up. It
wasn’t the mess that bothered him but the idea that Rafael might be
disgusted by his mess. Some weird backward logic that was.
Rafael frowned. “Are you all right? You seem out of it.”
“I’m feeling a little down,” he admitted, pushing himself into a
sitting position. “Russell’s disappearance has me a little
discombobulated.” He was worried about what had happened,
terrified really.
The nymph worried his bottom lip. “Officer Morrow said no news
didn’t necessarily mean bad news.”
It didn’t mean good news either, but Cody didn’t say so. He
forced himself to smile. “Where’s your beekeeping outfit?” he asked,
changing the subject.
“The car. I don’t drive with it on.”
The image was a funny one. His lips twitched. His host was very
good at tickling him and making him forget about his melancholy.
Rafael all but stomped his foot. “Don’t you start laughing at me
again. Mosquitos carry West Nile.”
66
Jana Downs
“Which you can’t get,” Cody reminded him.
“And pollen causes allergies.”
“Which you don’t have.”
Rafael’s nostrils flared as he leveled a glare at Cody. “You’re
teasing me again.”
Cody nodded. “Yep. I think you’re cute.”
“Stop saying that.” Rafael spun on his heel. “Get dressed. I have
to drop by Claymore’s office to deliver these latest dictations before
we head out.”
“Can we go through a drive-thru on the way out? I’m hungry,”
Cody called after him. He waited for it. Three. Two. One.
“Are you joking?” Rafael shouted from the hallway. “Fast food
establishments are absolutely disgust—” He cut himself off. “You’re
making fun of me again!”
Cody cackled, the act releasing the last little bit of tension from
his shoulders.
In the weeks since he’d arrived here he and Rafael had developed
an equilibrium between them. Cody got to tease him a little bit and
Rafael got to drive him crazy with the endless list of chores that he’d
had to learn to do “properly,” but they had a good rapport. Though
they’d not spoken about Cody’s admission of attraction since that day
in the café on campus, there was a definite awareness between them
that went far beyond host and guest or interviewer and interviewee.
His teasing was another form of flirtation at this point. It was sad
considering he didn’t even know whether or not Rafael was really into
guys or if he was just flattered by the attention.
He threw his sheets off and rolled to his feet.
“You ought to sleep with something on at least,” a whispered
voice said from the doorway.
Cody whipped his head around, surprised to find Rafael still
standing there. He’d thought Rafael had gone back downstairs. The
urge to cover himself was an unfamiliar one, but it rose nonetheless.
He swallowed as their eyes met.
Wolf at the Door
67
Rafael’s tongue darted out to touch his bottom lip. “Do you
always sleep naked?”
Cody shrugged, trying for nonchalance while his heart pounded
like a drum in his chest. “If I’m tired enough.”
“I”—he swallowed, stared—“washed your clothes this morning.”
Cody glanced at the man’s hands. A small bundle of clothes were
held, deliberately over Rafael’s crotch. “Thank you.” He was
surprised his voice was coming out as steady as it was. Considering
he hadn’t done much more than jerk off to some porn on Rafael’s
iPad since getting back, he was hornier than a lifer let out for good
behavior, and the way Rafael was looking at him wasn’t helping. At
all.
Rafael nodded. “So, um, here they are.” He knelt very carefully
and laid the clothes on the floor. The position made Cody’s cock
harden. He was at the perfect height for something lascivious. Of
course the idea of sucking dick would probably send Rafael into a
tailspin. He could hear it now. Blah, blah, blah, germs, blah, body
fluids, blah. He stared at his companion’s mouth. But he had such a
beautiful mouth. It looked made for kissing and fucking. He
shuddered.
“Aw, fuck,” Rafael whispered, drawing his attention upward.
It was the first time he’d ever heard the man curse. “Problems?”
Cody rumbled, his voice gravel filled.
“You’re hard.”
He shrugged. “You’re hot.” The smell of arousal was thick in the
air, and it wasn’t just his own. If Raf wasn’t hiding a hard-on in those
jeans of his, Cody would pay for lying.
Rafael shot to his feet. “I’ll just, uh, be downstairs.”
Cody watched him hungrily as he ran out of the room like his ass
was on fire. They really needed to address this thing directly. Cody
just wasn’t sure how to approach it. Rafael was a jumpy guy and
seemed absolutely untouchable most of the time.
68
Jana Downs
He looked down at his cock. “Thanks for scaring him,” he
muttered. “We could’ve said hello with a kiss first.” Though he
wasn’t sure if Rafael was really scared of Cody’s body or his own
reaction. He sniffed the air, scenting the delicious tang of desire he
found there. Yeah, he and Raf needed to sit down for a powwow and
explore this thing before both of them died of blue balls.
* * * *
Rafael panted in the small downstairs lavatory, hand wrapped
firmly around his cock as images of Cody’s body flashed in his mind
like a porn reel. He shouldn’t be doing this. Cody would be coming
down the stairs any second. For some reason that just made him
hotter. Thinking of being caught jerking off by Cody while he
imagined the wolf’s cock was enough to make pre-cum dribble from
his tip.
He bit into his bottom lip to keep from groaning. As much as he
tried to deny his own nature because of his hang-ups, he was a
nymph, a descendant of a fertility god. Sex and sexual thoughts drove
him as crazy as the next guy. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel desire. It
was that he couldn’t ever get far enough into sex with someone to
complete lose himself and forget said hang-ups.
“Fuck,” he whispered again, hand moving faster on his prick.
“Fuck.” Pleasure streaked up and down his dick, forcing all thoughts
out of his head but ones of release. It was technically very bad
manners for one to masturbate to their house guests, but he couldn’t
seem to stop himself. He couldn’t walk around with his hardness
making a tent of his pants all day. Relieving it was the only option.
He wanted Cody’s hands on him. The shock of that thought
should’ve been enough to kill the hard-on, but it wasn’t. Since Cody
had moved in, he’d slowly touched him more and more. They were
casual touches, innocent ones, but even those had made him recoil at
first. Gradually, though, he’d come to expect and take comfort in
Wolf at the Door
69
those. The comfort had transformed into blatant lust in the past few
days. Every time Cody patted Rafael’s shoulder or ruffled his hair,
he’d sported woods for what seemed like hours afterward. Seeing
Cody naked and hard was too much for him. He needed to come.
Now.
He worked his dick faster, chasing orgasm as he grew harder if
that were possible. “Cody,” he whispered the other man’s name
naughtily, closing his eyes to imagine it was really Cody’s hand there,
Cody’s touch commanding he take pleasure in this. He couldn’t help
the groan that issued from his throat.
He clamped his mouth shut, determined not to make another peep.
All he could hear was his heart thundering in his ears, so he needed to
be quiet. He couldn’t risk Cody finding out. Sure, the man had said
he’d found him attractive, but Rafael wasn’t a casual dater. In fact, he
wasn’t much a dater at all. He was too much work for the normal
individual, and Cody only had six months. Rafael wouldn’t be able to
handle losing someone with so much potential as a partner,
considering it would probably take that long for him to get used to the
idea of having sex to begin with.
Another hand wrapped around his dick.
His eyes shot wide as he looked in the mirror in front of him.
Cody crowded in behind him in the small half bath, his hand brushing
Rafael’s aside as he took over the task. His eyes ate Rafael alive,
filled to the brim with extraordinary heat. He hadn’t even finished
dressing. He was clad only in the jeans Rafael had brought to his
room and nothing else. He pressed against Rafael so he could feel the
answering arousal through Cody’s pants and the scorching heat of his
chest against Rafael’s back.
He couldn’t speak, couldn’t protest, could only stare into Cody’s
eyes via the mirror as Cody’s hand wrought untold pleasure on his
senses.
The wolf leaned down and pressed his lips to the shell of Rafael’s
ear. “That’s it, sweet. Take your pleasure. Revel in this.”
70
Jana Downs
Rafael groaned, the words tightening his sac. He gripped the
edges of the sink basin to steady himself.
Cody made a circular motion on the head of his cock that made
Rafael’s eyes cross. “I want you to come for me, Raf. I want you to
give me every drop.”
Release raced toward him, sending electrical pulses up and down
his spine as his brain diverted every available bit of blood into his
cock.
“Cody,” he whispered. “You don’t have to.” This wasn’t like him.
He didn’t let anyone touch him like this, but, God, he wanted Cody to.
“Want to, sweet,” Cody rumbled. “Have to. Feel how hard you
make me?” He pressed closer, jabbing Rafael in the back. “Want you
to come for me. Want to watch.”
Rafael panted, his hips rocking of their own accord into the circle
of Cody’s fist before pressing back into the heat of Cody’s body.
Cody ground against him from behind, his hand moving faster.
“That’s it, sweet. Move for me. Show me you want this.” Cody’s
voice had gotten so deep and guttural that understanding him was a
test of Rafael’s linguistic skills. It was so sexy to see him so
animalistic for some reason.
His thoughts scattered as he was thrown off the precipice of
pleasure.
He was vaguely aware of crying out as he lost his mind. His cock
erupted, spilling his sticky pleasure into the continually pumping fist
of his house guest. Cody wrung him out, pushing him farther until he
was shuddering with each movement of his hand.
Spent, he gripped the sink harder to keep from falling over. Their
eyes met in the mirror again. “Cody?” he panted, his voice a little
hoarse.
Cody pressed a kiss to his ear again. “Shh, it’s okay. You were
beautiful.” He released Rafael’s prick and took a step back. “Clean up
in here. I have to go change.”
Wolf at the Door
71
“But you just got dressed,” Rafael said, trying to pull his
scrambled thoughts back together.
Cody smiled ruefully. “Yes, well, I wasn’t planning on coming in
my jeans when I put them on.” He winked.
Heat washed over Rafael’s cheeks. Yeah. That happened. They’d
actually…Wow.
He nodded, unable to speak.
Cody slipped from the room as quietly as he’d come in, leaving
Rafael there to stare at his reflection. The stark white bathroom was
clean and sterile, the way he’d always kept it, but there seemed to be a
prevalent warmth here now, a memory that would continue to tease
him every time he came in here.
He turned on the sink, waiting until the water was warm enough,
and then began to clean up.
* * * *
Much later than he’d planned on leaving, they were both dressed
and ready to go. Not that Rafael dared look at Cody or anything. He
just wanted to enjoy the way he felt and didn’t want to worry about
answering questions or, worse, hear about how what had happened
between them needed to go further soon. His anxiety started rising at
the thought. While their interaction in the bathroom hadn’t really
bothered him, he was nowhere near ready to have sex. That was
allover body contact, sweat, and a big mess.
“Whatever you’re thinking about, knock it off,” Cody
commanded, tying his shoelaces in the foyer. “I can smell your fear.
I’m not an axe murderer in a scare house. I told you, no pressure.
What happened between us was wonderful, but I don’t expect
anything more.”
Rafael blinked. Cody was now a mind reader.
Cody straightened and pulled open the door. “You have an
incredibly expressive face. It’s not hard to figure out what you’re
72
Jana Downs
feeling.” He nodded toward the small alcove where Rafael kept his
work stuff. “Grab the dictations for Claymore.”
“You don’t have to handle me,” Rafael said quietly, crossing over
to the desk to fetch his things before he forgot about them. “I can look
after myself.” He’d managed his life just fine before Cody came
along.
“I know that.” Cody leaned against the doorway, crossing his
arms over his chest. “Just because I let you know what I’m thinking
doesn’t mean that I think less of you or that I feel like I need to hold
your hand. We’re good.”
Rafael’s grip tightened on the papers he was holding. He knew he
was defensive about how people thought about him. Ever since he
was a child, people around him had assumed he was less intelligent
or, worse, that he was somehow fragile. It was hard to get out of the
mode that he had been in for so long. Cody had never really judged
him. In fact, he’d gone out of his way not to and to accommodate
Rafael’s needs.
“Sorry,” he said, walking past him out the open door and then out
onto the porch. He waited for Cody to close the door so he could lock
it. “I don’t mean to be so snappy.”
Cody shrugged. “It’s all good. I get that you’ve had to deal with
Grade A assholes in the past.”
“My parents among them, I’m afraid.” He fished the keys from his
pocket before inserting the correct one into the hole and locking the
door. It was the first time he’d mentioned his parents. He wasn’t sure
why he mentioned them now. “They were not kind people. Once I
developed my tics as a child, my father believed if he was hard
enough on me and forced me into situations that deliberately
aggravated them often enough that they would disappear.”
“But that just made it worse,” Cody said, finishing Rafael’s
sentence. “Your parents are assholes. I’m sorry you had to go through
that.”
Wolf at the Door
73
Rafael shrugged. It was in the past, and he had managed to escape
from that life and their hold on him. He was proud of the life he’d
built in America. “I wish things could have been different, but they
weren’t, so what can I do but move on?” He wasn’t trying to be
nonchalant. He was just being practical. “I hope you’ll forgive me
when I overreact to things. I know it’s not an excuse, but I wanted
you to know the reasoning behind it.” It was lame, but that was the
best he could come up with.
“You’re fine. So long as you don’t shut me out and we can talk
over whatever is bothering you, I’m fine with it. Sometimes I’m a
little socially inept when it comes to other people’s feelings, so if I
hurt yours let me know.”
They descended the steps and walked out toward Rafael’s little
compact, feet crunching on the gravel as they made their way. Cody
was a lot more thoughtful than he gave himself credit for. As blunt as
he was, he always seemed to be aware of Rafael’s feelings and
accommodated him accordingly. It made Rafael wonder if it wasn’t
himself that was really the one who needed to pay a little bit more
attention.
He unlocked the door. “So your parents met when they were
young?” he asked to make conversation, already knowing the answer.
Over the course of their dictations he’d learned a lot about Cody.
Cody had been very forthcoming about the facts of his life before his
curse had taken effect at the age of twenty-five and of the details in
the time that occurred afterward.
However, the more emotional things, he shied away from. Not
that Rafael blamed him. He wouldn’t have wanted to bare his soul for
a perfect stranger either, especially if said stranger was going to put
the story in published works, no matter if it was only a PhD
publishing journal. “Were they good to you?”
Cody nodded, pulling himself into the compact with a little effort.
“They were young, but it was true love and, in my experience, true
love really can’t be cruel because whoever is experiencing it is so
74
Jana Downs
happy. They warned me about what was going to happen and tried to
prepare me for the inevitable as best they could. I’m pretty spoiled as
far as that goes. My mother even checks in with Russell during my
twenty-five years stints to make sure that I’m being properly looked
after. She and my father moved to Australia a couple years ago so,
needless to say, we haven’t spoken much.”
“Have you called them since you’ve been back?” Rafael asked.
He envied the picture Cody painted of his folks. It seemed like a
fantasy out of Rafael’s childhood. Loving parents, warm home, and
obvious love between them was something Rafael that always hoped
for.
“Unfortunately, no. I have no way to get in touch with them.
Russell has all the information.” At the mention of his friend, Cody
seemed to pull in to himself. He was still very upset about his missing
Sentinel.
Rafael felt a fission of guilt at that. He’d promised Cody that he
would help him find Russell, and he done little to assist in the request
other than putting him in touch with the police. He should have been
doing something more proactive, but his knowledge of finding people
came from the very limited experience given to him by detective
shows and daytime TV. There had to be something for him to do
though.
“I’m sorry we haven’t been able to find your friend,” he said. The
words seemed woefully inadequate. “Maybe we should try to
approach a private detective. They might be able to provide an answer
faster than the police.”
As busy as police officers were on any given day, it wouldn’t
surprise him that they put the case of a grown man, a Nightkin, who
had gone missing and reported only by a friend he was in contact with
only once every quarter of a century on the back burner.
“Do you know any?” Cody asked, looking hopeful. “I can pay.”
“I don’t know one personally, but I do know that Asheville has at
least a couple we could get into contact with.” He’d borrow the phone
Wolf at the Door
75
book from Professor Claymore today when they stopped in and make
phone calls while Cody was playing with his wolves in Cherokee.
Doing something proactive would make him feel at least a little better
about holding Cody to his promise of sharing information about
himself and the rest of the Forgotten.
Cody nodded, a smile breaking through the melancholy. “Cool. I
think that sounds awesome.” Before Rafael could crank the engine,
Cody leaned over and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Thanks, sweet.”
Rafael raised his hand to touch the place Cody kissed, his heart
skipping a beat once again. It seemed to do that every time Cody got
close to him, and it wasn’t because his anxiety was spiking over the
amount of germs in Cody’s mouth. As he’d noted before, Cody
tended to ease his anxieties rather than exacerbate them.
“I didn’t do anything yet,” he hastened to say. He didn’t want to
get Cody’s hopes up, but he felt like a private detective was the better
course of action at this point. “So what happens if you find your
Sentinel? Do you go with him or what?”
Cody shrugged. “Usually a Sentinel is there more or less to help
me adjust to the new environment I find myself in. They teach us
about new technologies, get us housing, new clothes, anything we
need really. Think of them as a very personal concierge service.
Ultimately what we do and where we go is up to us, but the Sentinel
gets to make suggestions. If Russell made arrangements for me to
have a rental property, then I’ll actually have somewhere to stay, but
if it’s not close enough I can always give notice and go somewhere
else.”
Rafael frowned as he cranked the engine. The idea of Cody going
off with his Sentinel buddy and forgetting all about Rafael did not sit
well with him. As loath as he had been to have house guests previous
to Cody’s arrival, he was used to his presence now. In fact, the house
would be more than a little empty without him there. He’d come to
anticipate, even to crave the little touches Cody gave him. Being
76
Jana Downs
alone again after discovering the pleasure to be found in someone
else’s company left him cold.
“Where would you go? I mean, if you chose where you’re going
to be staying at.” He tried not to sound like he cared one way or the
other, but he didn’t think he managed it.
Cody looked over at him as Rafael backed out of the driveway.
“I’d like to stay around here actually. If you weren’t opposed to it, I’d
like to stay with you.”
Rafael let out a breath that he hadn’t realized he was holding.
“Are you sure?” He knew he could be difficult to live with.
“If you let me,” Cody said. “I know that you weren’t crazy about
having a roommate to begin with, but I thought you and I got along
okay. I can pay you rent now that I have access to my bank accounts.
I’m a pack animal. I prefer to room with someone else anyway.
Russell always stayed with me during my two-legged stints.”
He hit his left signal as he pulled onto the main road. “I would like
for you to stay.” If for nothing else than he enjoyed Cody’s company.
If he were being honest with himself, which he had no intention of
being, he would admit that he was eager to continue this flirtation and
interaction between them so long as they remained on the same page.
Cody nodded like it was decided. “Fair warning though, I have
every intention of the two of us being more than friends.”
Rafael swerved in surprise.
Cody chuckled. “Now don’t wreck and kill us. It’s not that bad of
an idea. I like you, you like me, we’re both aware of one another’s
boundaries and limitations, so I see no reason that you shouldn’t come
at this thing like we’re making a go of it.”
He worried his bottom lip. The last time he’d tried “dating,” bad
things had happened. Of course that had been a while back, and none
of those men had really cared about Rafael’s boundaries. They had
been more concerned with trying to mow down Rafael’s opposition
with an overload of experiences that Rafael really hadn’t been ready
for.
Wolf at the Door
77
“You liked what we did earlier?”
Rafael nodded, not trusting himself to speak.
“Then we’ll do it again. If at any point you feel uncomfortable
with something or like you’re not ready to try something new, then
we’ll stick to your comfort zone.”
“Why are you doing this?” Rafael asked. “Most people think I’m
a lot of work with very little payoff.” He’d been told more than once
by multiple boyfriends and potential boyfriends. Hell, even strangers
who had wanted to get into his pants had made that statement.
Cody smiled. “You’re smart, funny, granted not always on
purpose, but still funny, not to mention sexy as all get out. Whoever
doesn’t think you’re worth it doesn’t deserve anything you give them.
I’ve told you before, Rafael, you really underestimate yourself.”
“What about your deadline?” That was one point that he had even
greater trepidation about, even more than his own anxieties. Cody
only had so many months in this form before he had to return to his
wolf form and stay that way for another twenty-five years.
“Well, there are a couple possibilities with my situation that may
or may not work for you. As you know I have six months. One
scenario, we date and find out that we’re better off friends. In which
case, no harm, no foul, and I’ll see you next quarter century. Another
way this could work is that you and I are happy together but we’re not
ready to make a permanent commitment with a claiming, in which
case, I’m willing to put things on hold for twenty-five years and see
where we are the next time I’m human. That option isn’t ideal or easy,
but it can be done. I’ll stay in Cherokee where I’ve been for the past
fifty years anyway and you can come visit if you want. I won’t be
fabulous at communication, but I can make do.” He tapped out a
rhythm on his thigh as Rafael stopped at the light before they reached
the university. “Of course, the last option would only be an option if
we fell irrevocably and absolutely head over ass for one another.”
“And what option is that?” Rafael asked, turning over the
possibilities Cody offered in his head. He would definitely be lonely
78
Jana Downs
if he went with option two, but depending on how things went, it
might very well be worth it. It wasn’t like he had a huge social life
now or couldn’t make do in the romance department by himself for a
given period of time.
“We could go to a claiming shop and formally get together.”
Rafael whipped his head to the side to look at Cody. Claiming was
in irrevocable commitment for Nightkin. It couldn’t be undone and
was literally tattooed to one’s face for the entire Nightkin world to see
with special ink that glowed when one’s significant other was around.
Humans couldn’t see it but any Nightkin definitely could.
“That’s a bit extreme considering how short of time we’ve known
one another don’t you think?” His parents certainly hadn’t claimed
one another, though they’d had two children together. Theirs was a
political match though, so Rafael shouldn’t have been surprised.
Cody shrugged. “It really just depends on how things go between
us. If we’re not ready, we’re not ready. I was just laying out all the
options. I still think it’s worth a try, us dating, not the claiming thing
right now.”
Rafael’s immediate reaction was to say yes and to proceed right
into giddy territory. He already liked Cody, had liked him from day
one, so the prospect of getting to know him in a more intimate manner
was one that greatly appealed. However, he was cautious by nature at
this point. He’d had enough heartache in his life to last an eternity. He
didn’t want to risk further hurt on the off chance that this didn’t work
out.
A new voice rose up to overcome his father’s normally cruel and
negative one. Life is risk. If you don’t try, you’ll regret it.
He was so startled by the internal optimism that the word just
popped out of his mouth. “Yes.” He looked over at Cody as the light
turned green. “I want to date you.”
“Awesome.”
Wolf at the Door
79
Cody certainly had a knack for understatements. He never really
overly expressed anything. His laid-back attitude was one of the
things that Rafael admired about him.
A car honked behind him, and Rafael let off the brake to
accelerate. Life had certainly gotten unpredictable since Cody had
walked into his life, but he couldn’t say that he minded. In fact,
thinking about earlier, life had gotten downright exciting.
80
Jana Downs
Chapter Seven
Cody couldn’t help but stare over at Rafael as they drove toward
Claymore’s building. He’d tried to downplay their earlier interaction
and make it so Rafael wouldn’t think it was some big deal but to
Cody it certainly had been. He wasn’t the type to fool around without
some sort of acknowledgment or connection to begin with, but he’d
acted on impulse, taking a hold of Rafael’s pleasure like it had been
his job all along.
He was intensely happy that Rafael had agreed to try dating. If
he’d said no, Cody was pretty certain he would have tried to convince
him otherwise. Gods knew that seducing his little nymph wouldn’t be
nearly as straightforward as it would be with anyone else. So he was
glad that Rafael was giving him a chance. It wasn’t about sex or
physical release. It was about acting on the feelings that were growing
between them.
He finally found a parking space down toward the library that
only worked because Rafael drove a compact. It would be an uphill
hike back to Stillwell Hall.
“Parking on this campus sucks,” Cody said, unwedging himself
from between the floorboard and the dashboard where his knees were
jammed. He was going to take some of his savings and buy himself a
vehicle to drive around for the next few months. He didn’t know how
much more he could take being crammed into Rafael little car.
Rafael nodded. It was a point they agreed on absolutely. Even
faculty parking was ridiculous. “That’s what you get when you take a
very small campus and try to cram an extra five hundred vehicles on
it. I don’t know why Professor Claymore needed these in hard copy. It
Wolf at the Door
81
would’ve been more beneficial and easy for the both of us if I would
have e-mailed it to him and he could’ve printed it out.”
“You really think he can find his printer?” Cody joked. He wasn’t
sure how Rafael dealt with sitting in Claymore’s office. He started
tidying Cody’s room every time he was in there, and it wasn’t like
Cody had much.
Rafael sighed. “Probably not. Still, I’m not his secretary.”
It was in the middle of the 9:00 a.m. classes so there were a few
students mulling around campus. A few days spent hanging around
while Rafael had gone about his business in the anthropology
department had let Cody learn those lull times. It was pretty
interesting to people watch. The morning students always seemed to
be in a hurry, eager to get to class before they were late while the
afternoon students tended to mosey around, taking their time or
ducking into the library to grab a bit of lunch.
“What do you think about me taking a few classes?” The summer
classes were shorter. They were only a few weeks long. The
condensed version might be a fun way to occupy his time. The next
session started in a week.
Rafael looked over at him, surprise written over his face. “If you
want to, go for it. I really enjoyed studying undergrad here. What are
your interests?”
Cody shrugged. “Not sure. I hadn’t really thought it out all the
way, but it had crossed my mind a couple times. Of course I don’t
want to waste the time I have left, but if I schedule a class or two
during the times you’re going to be busy anyway, I’ll consider the
time well spent.”
“Let’s stop by the registrar’s office on the way back so that you
can look over some of their stuff. Not all of it’s on the website.”
Cody was a little addicted to the Internet. There was so much to
learn and so much to catch up on. The fact that he didn’t have to have
a physical newspaper to have access to all the current news blew his
mind. Coupled with the fact that he could instantly download books,
82
Jana Downs
movies, and television programs to a portable device made him think
he was living in the world of The Jetsons. The world had come a long
way in twenty-five years.
Rafael pulled on his gloves as they approached the front entrance
of the red brick building. The man had boxes and boxes of disposable
gloves at home stuck under the sink in the kitchen. Cody had joked
that he should buy stocks considering how many he used in any given
day. But it wasn’t far from the truth. Rafael was a little bit of a control
freak. He had to feel like he was in command of his environment, and
the little tidbit he’d shared about his parents made Cody suspect that
they were not only contributors to the severity of his anxiety but were
also the main causes of it.
They took the elevator to the second floor. Since it was a Friday,
the receptionist was off so there was no one there to greet them when
they stepped off right outside the doorway to the anthropology office.
Since most classes were Monday through Thursday and since most
students didn’t take a lot of summer classes, the head of the
department had felt that keeping her on full-time was a waste of the
department’s resources. Rafael had not been happy about the fact,
considering Fridays were usually when the receptionist did all the
busy work for the staff that she wasn’t able to get to during the week
when she was doing her regular tasks.
The sitting area was extraordinarily quiet as they passed her desk
and proceeded into the hall of offices. Plaques celebrating department
achievements and sponsorships lined the walls between doorways.
Which was good because otherwise the halls were a boring shade of
cream. Rafael knocked twice on the door to Claymore’s office. “Prof,
I’m dropping off the dictation notes you asked for,” he said, speaking
a little louder than he normally would. When there was no answer he
knocked again. He frowned, twisting his wrists so that he could look
at his watch. “He told me to drop them by during his office hours. He
should be here.”
Wolf at the Door
83
Cody shrugged. “Maybe he had to step out for a minute for some
reason. Does he have a box you can leave them in?”
Rafael sighed. “He does but it’s full. I would leave it with the
secretary but, you know.” His irritation was plain. “He never leaves
his office locked. I’ll just leave it on his desk.”
“Good idea. You mind if I grab a soda from the machine in the
student lounge while you do?”
“Go ahead,” Rafael said, waving him on. “I’ll just be a second.”
He turned around and headed back down the hallway as Rafael
opened the door. Rafael’s surprised yelp made him turn back, and as
he did the smell hit him.
Copper and the undeniable scent of decay spilled out into the
hallway. He was moving before it really registered in his mind what
that scent indicated. Rafael stood unmoving, paler than Cody had ever
seen him, staring into Professor Claymore’s office. He pulled him
back from the door, forcing the smaller man behind him as he faced
what was in the room.
Claymore sat in his chair, slumped to the side like a drunk on a
barstool. His blue button-up was stained an ugly reddish brown. His
neck was covered with the stuff, but the ragged gash beneath was
clearly visible. He couldn’t have been there for very long judging by
the intensity of the smell. Cody resisted the urge to gag as the air
conditioner cut on, pushing the smell of decay further out into the
hallway. How he hadn’t smelled it before he wasn’t entirely sure, but
now that he had it was going to be a while before he was able to get it
out of his sensitive nose.
He turned his head to the side. “Call 911,” he commanded, trying
very hard not to taste the air as well as smell it.
“Professor?” Rafael called, pushing at Cody’s shoulders. “You’ve
got to help him.”
“There is no helping him, Raf,” he said gently. “Sweet, he’s dead.
By the smell he’s been that way for a few hours now.” He reached out
and pulled the door shut, entombing the corpse back where they found
84
Jana Downs
it. Since Rafael was still not moving he fished his phone from his
pocket. It took him a minute to get the thing unlocked before he
dialed 911 himself.
“911, what is your emergency?” the operator asked by way of
greeting.
“I’m at Western Carolina University and one of the professors
appears to have been attacked,” Cody said, trying to keep the tremor
out of his voice. He hunted and killed his food regularly, but this, this
was something else. This was murder and was unique to beings who
could take human form.
“Is he injured?”
“I think he’s dead,” Cody said. He didn’t “think” anything. He
knew. But if he said that the humans were liable to think he was the
one who did it simply for the fact that he knew what a dead body
looked like. Rafael whimpered beside him.
“All right, sir, remain calm. I’m sending authorities and
emergency members out to you. Is the person who attacked him still
in the building?”
“I don’t know. I’m standing in front of his office. No one seems to
be here but me and his PhD student. We were dropping something off
to him.” He was babbling. He knew he was babbling. He couldn’t
seem to help it though. The image of Claymore, the jovial, if flighty,
professor with his throat cut was burned into his frontal lobe. “He’s
not breathing. He’s too still. He’s dead.” He wasn’t even bleeding
anymore. He probably bled out in minutes. Cody swallowed.
“Calm down, sir. They’re coming.”
Rafael trembled, staring at the door like it was ghost. “I just talked
to him yesterday. I just—” He cut himself off, wringing his hands.
“It’s going to be so hard to get that mess cleaned off his desk. What if
it got on the floor?” He was about to lose it. His pupils were so small
that they were almost consumed by the rest of his eyes. “They’ll never
get it out of the carpet.”
Wolf at the Door
85
“I have to go,” Cody said, hanging up the phone before the
operator could protest.
He reached out, and Rafael slapped his hands away. “Don’t touch
me! You haven’t washed your hands!”
Cody held his hands up in a classic gesture of surrender. “Okay,
okay, I’m not going to touch you. I need you to think of something
else though. Someone is going to be here in just a minute to clean up
the mess. Right now, you need to focus on something else.” He
wasn’t entirely sure what to have him focus on. Gods knew that he
couldn’t think of anything else either. Poor Claymore. His wife was
going to be devastated. They’d met her only a few days ago and it was
abundantly clear that she loved her quirky husband very much.
Rafael nodded like what Cody was saying made sense. “I need
groceries,” he said, staring at Cody like he had all the answers.
“Good,” Cody said, taking the words like the lifeline they were.
“What do we need from the grocery store?”
Rafael’s bottom lip began to tremble. “I didn’t make a list.”
“That’s okay,” Cody soothed. “We’re going to make one now. I
know you usually look at the inventory before you make a list, but
we’re going to do things a little differently today.” He pointed to the
secretary’s desk. “Go clean off the desk so you can sit down and then
get a piece of paper and a pen out.”
He didn’t dare try to lead Rafael over there. Any little touch was
liable to send him in a downward spiral.
Rafael did as he was bid. He calmly walked over to the secretary’s
chair and took out his packet of wet wipes. Cleaning usually did the
trick when he started to have a panic attack. Cody had watched him
use it on more than one occasion since coming to live with him. Once
he was in that mode he was single minded, calm. It was exactly the
state of mind he needed to be in at the moment.
Cody gnawed on his bottom lip. He couldn’t smell the rot
anymore. He should have still been able to smell it. He looked at the
door, puzzled. It was then he noticed the mark carved in the upper left
86
Jana Downs
corner. Containment rune. Whatever had killed Claymore had known
and could use magic. That narrowed things down considerably, at
least as far as species went. Wasn’t human. Wasn’t a shifter or a
werewolf. The only other possibilities were a fae or a witch.
Why would either want to kill an anthropology professor?
His phone rang.
He hit the send button to answer. “Yeah?”
“I need you to stay on the phone with me, sir,” the operator said.
“What’s your name?”
“Cody.”
“Okay, Cody, can you stay on the phone with me?”
Cody nodded only to realize that she couldn’t see him. “Yeah. I
will. Sorry. My friend needed me. He’s upset. It was his professor.”
Too much information. He chastised himself, but he couldn’t seem to
shut up. “Are the police almost here?” A familiar fear trickled down
his spine that had nothing to do with guilt and everything to do with
the fact that the last time he was on two legs if a Nightkin was found
at the scene of a crime they were most likely blamed for whatever law
had been broken.
“Yes, Cody. They’re almost there. Another five minutes. Can you
tell me what building you’re in?”
“Cody,” Rafael called from behind him. “I’m ready to start the
list.”
He turned his face away from the speaker. “Okay, sweet. Start
your list from memory. Don’t forget you need to get some dish soap
this time.”
“Cody?” the operator asked.
“Sorry. He needs to write down a list. It helps when he starts to
panic.” It took him a minute to remember her asking him a question.
“It’s Stillwell Hall. Suite 305.”
“Okay, Cody. I’m letting dispatch know.” She was so calm, like
everything was business as usual despite the fact that he was standing
in a building with a clearly murdered dead guy. He put the phone on
Wolf at the Door
87
speaker and went over to the desk where Rafael was sitting, scribbling
away. He wished he could compartmentalize like that. Rafael looked
just as calm as she sounded, writing away on the paper.
“I’m going to forget something,” he muttered, frowning at the list.
“I know it.”
“That’s okay. We can go back to the store if we have to.” Oddly
enough, focusing on Rafael helped him think and kept him from
dwelling too much on the corpse in the other room. “You’re doing
great, Raf.”
Rafael snorted. “No. I’m being insane. I know I am.” Tears
tracked down his cheeks. He looked up from the desk. “I just need the
list, okay?”
“It’s fine, sweet,” Cody promised. “You’re helping me.” He ached
to reach out and take Rafael into his arms and make him feel better,
but he wasn’t entirely sure it would help.
* * * *
Rafael hugged himself tight as Officer Morrow asked him a
million questions about everything from Professor Claymore’s normal
schedule to any enemies he might have had. He wasn’t being very
helpful. No one disliked Claymore, not even his failing students. He
was like Santa Claus. Who the hell could hate Santa?
The coroner rolled the corpse out in a black bag, the wheels of the
cart squeaking as they headed toward the elevator. There were so
many uniformed people in the hallway, bustling around like ants on a
hill.
“You were his PhD student, correct?” Officer Morrow asked,
drawing his attention back to their conversation.
Rafael nodded. “Yes. He’s personally overseeing my work. There
was another candidate, but he decided not to take classes this
summer.” It was a small university with an even smaller doctoral
88
Jana Downs
program. There were only four PhD students in the anthropology
department.
“You worked in his office regularly?”
He nodded.
“Would you be able to tell if anything was missing?”
He hesitated a minute before nodding. “Professor Claymore isn’t
exactly the most organized man I know.” He winced as he realized his
tense was off. “Wasn’t. He wasn’t organized.” He wanted to vomit at
the thought. No one deserved that. Claymore especially didn’t deserve
that. The man may have been human, but he had been Rafael’s
mentor and the first person to really believe he could accomplish
much of anything in the department.
“Will you try?”
“Where’s Cody?”
“He’s talking to Officer Rigley over there,” Officer Morrow said,
pointing down the hallway behind Rafael. “Will you try to see if you
notice anything missing in his office really quick?”
He swallowed, remembering the blood congealing on the desk. He
shuddered. “I’ll try. Can Cody come?”
“If you like.”
“Have you heard anything about Russell?” Rafael asked.
“The missing persons report you and your friend filled out?”
He nodded.
“Not yet. I promise I’ll let you know.” He motioned to someone
behind Rafael. “Come on. Let’s have you take a look at the office
really fast since we’ve finished with pictures.”
Rafael followed after him, eager to get this over with. Just the
thought of Claymore’s mess was enough to give him nightmares on a
normal day. Today he was liable to go into a cleaning fit.
He sighed. He was so embarrassed by his earlier behavior. He’d
been moments away from having a meltdown like a two-year-old
fighting sleep, and Cody had to calm him down while he’d talked to
Wolf at the Door
89
the 911 operator. He hated his anxiety and hated feeling powerless in
the face of whatever the hell mental problem he had.
Cody fell into step beside him, giving him a playful bump with his
hips. “You okay?”
“I don’t know,” Rafael said honestly. He wasn’t about to panic
anymore, but he was certainly heartsick. “I just can’t wrap my mind
around the fact that someone would do this.”
“The world is full of fucking assholes,” Cody said.
The office door was open, and people were still milling around
inside. They cleared out at an order from Officer Rigley. Rafael
surprised even himself by reaching out and taking Cody’s hand,
squeezing it tight as they passed the threshold. The touch gave him
the connection, and it seemed to ground him as his senses were
confronted with what had gone on in this office only hours before.
The papers on the floor were probably pointless to sift through
considering there were always random stacks and piles of books
sitting around so he didn’t bother to kneel there. Instead, he crossed
the space straight toward the bookshelves behind the desk, scanning
the permanent collection of books and papers for anything that might
be missing. He couldn’t bring himself to go to the desk quite yet, it
was too much. However, he could inch closer in his own way. Cody’s
comforting presence beside him allowed his mind to take a vacation
from what was really going on.
I need to call his wife. The police were probably going to go to
their house and let her know in person, but they were strangers and
Western Carolina University was a community and a tight-knit one at
that. She needed a familiar face, someone who knew Professor
Claymore. He just wasn’t sure if it was appropriate in human circles
to do so. Cody was probably going to be useless on that front as well
because of his social awkwardness, but Rafael felt like he needed to
do something.
“Should bring Mrs. Claymore something to eat,” Rafael said,
speaking out loud. He knew Cody probably had no idea what he was
90
Jana Downs
saying, but it comforted him to share his thoughts. “She’s probably
not going to feel like cooking. She’s an excellent cook though.
Claymore always said that he put on the extra fifty when he met her
because of it.”
Cody chuckled, squeezing his hand. “If the brownies she brought
in were any indication, then I can see exactly what you mean. It’s nice
that you thought of her. If you want we can go by the grocery store
and get her a hot meal to take over.”
Rafael was happy that he read his mind or deciphered his
thoughts, whichever he had done. “That sounds good.” God knew he
didn’t feel like cooking either. A hot meal cooked by someone else
that wasn’t fast food seemed ideal.
“There’s nothing missing from the shelf that I see,” Rafael said.
The only other place that he really had to look was the one place he
had no interest in looking at. He pulled another pair of gloves from
his pocket and slipped them on. Officer Rigley gave him a weird look
at that but it couldn’t be helped. There was no way he was touching a
desk that was covered in fluids without them.
“I was going to offer a pair to the both of you,” Officer Morrow
said. “I forgot that you always carried them.”
Rafael made no reply at that, too focused on the desk to really pay
Officer Morrow much attention. The school would probably clear all
this out and hire someone to clean. That much at least gave him
comfort. It felt strange looking down at the congealed mass on the
desktop and on the floor where it had fallen and knowing that it’d
come from Claymore.
There were his other classes’ papers. He did a quick count and
found all of them were there. The PhD papers were easy to distinguish
from the rest. It was the smallest pile on the table. He frowned as he
picked up the manila folder where his own paper had been. Claymore
kept hard copies of all his research in this particular folder.
“What’s wrong?” Cody asked.
Wolf at the Door
91
Everything was wrong at the moment, but this was more wrong
than all the rest. “All the hard copies of my research are gone.” A
chill went down his spine. “This was the folder they were in. It was
over two inches thick last time I was in here.”
Cody frowned. “Maybe he took it out to give to someone?”
Rafael shook his head. “No need. He had digital copies that he
gave out to Dr. Flint. If there was a consulting professor somewhere
on this floor, he might have, but why didn’t he give him a folder as
well?”
He glanced under the desk. “The tower for the computer is
missing.”
How did anyone not notice someone carrying around a computer
tower? He mentally chastised himself for the internal question. The
computer sciences department was one building over. Those students
and professors carried around crap like that all the time. It only
seemed odd now because he knew where it had disappeared from.
He turned to the police officers. “My research and his computer
tower seemed to be missing. Other than that I don’t see anything
else.” Just because the two were missing didn’t mean that the killer
took them, but it seemed suspicious to him.
They nodded in unison. “We’ve got your address jotted down if
we need anything else. If you can think of anything, you have my
number,” Officer Morrow said. He inclined his head toward the door.
“You two can leave now.”
Rafael let Cody guide him out of the room, the office, and then
down the stairs to the far right of the hallway since the elevators
weren’t working. Stairwells were usually a big no-no for Rafael just
because of the accumulation of germs, but just this once he was too
preoccupied with everything to really focus on that. Of course, he
didn’t touch the rail or anything, which helped.
They reached the outside sidewalk, and Cody released his hand.
Rafael frowned as he took in his countenance. The Forgotten was pale
and looked pinched. He opened his mouth to ask what was wrong
92
Jana Downs
only for Cody to make a mad dash toward the azalea bushes that lined
the front of the buildings. Rafael covered his mouth as Cody vomited
onto the dirt. He hadn’t even thought about how Cody would feel
about this whole thing. He’d been much more focused on how he
himself was feeling.
He walked up behind Cody and patted him gently on the back,
mimicking the motion he’d seen others do to people who were in
distress. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t even think about how
you would feel.” For some reason he had assumed that because Cody
was closer to his base nature that he would somehow be immune to
the pain and disturbance that true violence caused.
“Sorry,” Cody muttered. “It’s the smell. It’s so strong.” He
vomited again and a little part of Rafael screamed at him to back
away. For once he was able to ignore the command. Cody needed
him.
It seemed like endless moments before Cody stopped retching and
wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Slowly, he straightened.
“That was intense. I didn’t mean to lose it like that.”
Rafael shook his head. Cody had held it together far better than
Rafael had. He’d even taken care of Rafael during the whole process.
“You should’ve told me that the smell was bothering you. I wouldn’t
have made you come in there with me.”
“It’s okay. I wanted to be beside you. I know that couldn’t have
been easy to deal with.” Cody was so considerate, so aware of what
Rafael needed. “Man, I need some mouthwash bad.”
“It wasn’t easy, but I didn’t want you to make yourself sick on my
account.” He wanted to show Cody that he could reciprocate Cody’s
care. It was the only way things could work if they were going to try
to date. “Do you mind if we skip going out to Cherokee today? I think
I’m more in the mood to sit in front of the television and not think for
a few hours.” The urge to curl up in someone’s arms had never really
been an issue for him, but he felt it in full force now.
Wolf at the Door
93
Cody didn’t hesitate. He nodded. “Sounds good. We’ll drop off
something for Mrs. Claymore later. We’re going to have to give the
cops time to get over there.”
Rafael hadn’t thought of that, but he was right. It was hard to
understand or even figure out what he was supposed to do right now.
He was incredibly exhausted for some reason. Beyond that, he was
incredibly perplexed.
“Do you really think someone took my research?”
“Honestly?” Cody shrugged. “I have no idea. Last time I checked
the Forgotten weren’t exactly big news to anyone other than you
academics. We are called forgotten for a reason. No one remembers
or cares that we existed.”
He said that, but something niggled in the back of Rafael’s head
about the whole thing. Cody had told him about the weird phone call
the day they’d first met up. Rafael hadn’t taken it seriously,
dismissing the call as a prank by one of his fellow PhD students in an
attempt to spook him. Maybe there was a reason behind it that wasn’t
so easily explained.
Conspiracy theories could easily drive him insane, so he tried to
put it out of his mind, but the thought just didn’t seem to want to
leave. It seemed too coincidental for his tastes.
So he decided to focus on Cody instead.
“What do you need me to do? I mean, what can I do to make you
feel better? You did such a good job of taking care of me back there. I
need to return the favor.”
“To be honest, I’d really like a hug.” Cody shifted back and forth
on the balls of his feet, hesitating. “I mean, if you can handle it.”
Under normal circumstances the request would’ve been something
that Rafael agonized over. However, this was Cody they were talking
about. “No problem.” He sounded a lot steadier than he’d anticipated,
so that was good. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around
Cody’s middle, hugging him tightly. It felt so good in Cody’s arms.
The taller man wrapped him up in an embrace that surrounded him,
94
Jana Downs
cradled him rather than tied him down. The sensation was far from
unpleasant. In fact, it was the exact opposite.
“Let’s go home,” Cody said against his temple.
Rafael warmed. Home sounded very good right now.
Wolf at the Door
95
Chapter Eight
Cody’s mouth hung open as he took in the wreck that was
Rafael’s townhouse. Like the office, there was a rune etched into the
upper corner but unlike the one before, this one clearly was meant to
contain noise. They stood in the foyer staring into what was left of
Rafael’s living room. Papers and various objects littered the floor.
Even the couch was upended like someone with the Hulk’s temper
had pitched a fit in the middle of the house.
Rafael stood beside him, a quiet look of horror on his face as he
took it all in. “Why?” he whispered.
“I think it’s safe to say that they really were after your paper,”
Cody said, taking in the wreckage. “Go ahead and call the police. Or
just call Officer Morrow. That probably makes more sense.”
He moved about the house, checking to make sure that whoever
had broken in wasn’t still there. He winced as he took in the scattered
papers, spilled liquids, and broken furniture. Rafael was already upset
over what happened earlier. He imagined that he was going to be even
more upset now.
There was no one in the house, so he returned to the front foyer
where Rafael was standing, staring into the living room with a
haunted look on his face.
“Did you get a hold of them?” he asked, stepping in front of the
nymph.
Rafael nodded, hands curled into fists by his side. “Someone will
be here in a moment. They wanted to take pictures, so I’m not
supposed to touch anything.” He worried his bottom lip between his
teeth. “I just don’t understand why this is happening.”
96
Jana Downs
“Maybe you shouldn’t finish this paper of yours.” He hated to say
it, but if the subject for Rafael’s paper was the reason behind these
attacks, then it wasn’t safe for Rafael to continue writing it.
“I’ve worked too hard on it to stop. It’s my thesis!” Rafael looked
freaked out at the very mention of not continuing. “Maybe it’s
unrelated. It could’ve just been someone trying to find valuables or
something.”
That was possible, but Cody had long since stopped believing in
coincidences.
The second time they had to deal with the police was no better
than the first time they’d had to. Pictures and questions and a million
other uncomfortable related tasks frayed Cody’s nerves. He wanted
everyone to go away and leave them alone.
Soon enough he got his wish and he and Rafael were left with the
warning that the two incidents may be linked and they should both
take precautions and let the police know if they saw anything
suspicious. It was a warning that seemed a cheap reassurance to Cody
who had an innate distrust of any authority other than his own.
The warning was sound enough though, so Cody went through the
house making it as secure as he could with a few bits of nail and
deadbolts tightly fastened on all the exterior doors and windows. It
wouldn’t keep a Nightkin out, but it at least made him feel better.
There was no guarantee he was going to be sleeping anytime tonight
anyway.
He didn’t let Rafael know exactly how disturbed by the events he
was because he didn’t want to freak the nymph out. However, his
hackles were raised, and he trusted his instincts when they said the
danger was very close.
They stood in the wreckage of Rafael’s living room, looking
around at anything that was potentially salvageable. “Can you go grab
what cleaning supplies I’ll need from the kitchen? If you can find
them,” Rafael said, looking at the mass like it was something he was
really looking forward to scrubbing out of existence. “I’ll help,” Cody
Wolf at the Door
97
said, already heading in that direction. “I know how you like things
cleaned, and it’ll go quicker if it’s the two of us.” He made it sound
like Rafael had a choice about him helping, but he really didn’t. Cody
was going to make this right in any way he could, and that included
taking some of the burden off Rafael. He knew Rafael’s nerves were
already shot and he was probably a little overwhelmed with the
amount of cleaning that would be required before he would be
entirely comfortable in his own house again.
“You don’t have to,” Rafael protested.
“It’s my house, too, now, remember?” Cody gathered what he
could from the kitchen. The cleaning supplies were largely untouched
under the sink, so there was that. The vacuum cleaner in the upstairs
closet had been overturned but was otherwise unmolested as well.
When he returned to the living room, Rafael was putting things in
piles. “You want me to grab a couple trash bags?” Cody asked,
depositing his cleaning supplies on the floor beside the overturned
couch. The tidying would of course be first in Rafael’s mind, and then
the real work would begin.
“Please.” Rafael’s disgusted look as he stared at his broken things
made Cody mad all over again. Rafael had never hurt anyone, and
whoever had done this hadn’t just searched the house. No, they had
destroyed it. Whether it was a message or warning or a frustration, it
didn’t matter. All the mattered was they had hurt Rafael.
Time passed quickly as they set about righting Rafael’s world.
With every room that was put back together again, he seemed to relax
just a little bit more. It made Cody pleased and that much more
determined to get everything in order before they would sleep.
They were lucky that the house was as small as it was considering
how much work and effort it took to get everything sorted. A quick
glance at the clock on his phone revealed that it was nearly 10:00 p.m.
before they slowed down. The takeout they’d ordered earlier was long
forgotten, and Cody’s stomach rumbled.
98
Jana Downs
“Thank you,” Rafael said, kneeling on the freshly shampooed
carpet beside Cody. They’d made a sort of picnic area in the living
room, throwing a heavy comforter down where the couch they moved
out to the curb had been.
“I’m sorry about all your things.” Cody felt like he had been
saying sorry a lot today and was annoyed that he hadn’t been able to
really fix a damn thing.
Rafael shrugged. “Things are just things, Cody. I like my life
organized, but I wasn’t especially attached to anything here.” He
waved to the house. “When I came to America, I didn’t have anything
with me but a few thousand dollars. Starting again doesn’t bother me.
It bothers me that someone was here. It bothers me that someone
touched my things and wrecked my house and left their germs
everywhere, but losing my stuff isn’t devastating.”
Cody understood that. He’s had the house he’d built in his youth
up in Virginia broken into during one of the six-month stints and had
felt similarly. It wasn’t the physical objects but the feeling of
violation and of not being safe in his own house that he’d had the
problem with.
“I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.” It was a promise
that was easily given. Cody had been overprotective of the nymph
since they’d met, and it seemed the more emotionally attached he got
to the man the more he wanted to protect him.
“Cody?”
“Yes?”
Rafael licked his bottom lip. The nervous gesture was incredibly
endearing. “Would you care to have a shower with me?”
Cody’s eyebrows shot toward the ceiling. “You want to take a
shower with me?” What had happened to going slow and not pushing
boundaries?
“Shower’s somewhere easy to clean.” As if that explained
everything. Rafael sighed. “I’m numb right now, Cody. I need to feel
Wolf at the Door
99
something good, something warm. I feel like I’m covered in dirt, and
I don’t want to be alone.”
Cody nodded, understanding that much at least. He imagined after
the trauma of today Rafael wouldn’t want to be alone. Of course,
Cody didn’t want to be alone either. He pushed himself to his feet and
then offered Rafael a hand up, taking his rubber-gloved hand in order
to pull him to his feet.
This was going to be interesting. Rafael might not mean anything
sexually about offering to shower with Cody, but he imagined that
Cody’s body wouldn’t know the difference between naked comfort
time and naked sexy time. Especially after what had happened
between them earlier today. Cody’s instincts were all about reveling
in life at the moment, and sex would go a long way in celebrating the
fact that he was still alive. However, he wouldn’t push. Rafael didn’t
deserve that.
“I promise to behave,” he joked.
Their eyes met, and Rafael licked his bottom lip. “You don’t have
to.”
Gods, he was so lost.
* * * *
Rafael stripped off his clothes and folded them into the squares
before placing them on the floor. The ritual of it gave him comfort
while his mind raced with a million possibilities. He wasn’t sure why
he’d asked Cody to come bathe with him knowing that Rafael most
likely wouldn’t be able to go as far as what he actually wanted to.
Usually his anxiety overwhelmed the lust eventually despite Rafael’s
protests. However, their other interactions had given him some hope,
and more than anything right now he wanted to connect.
His nerves felt raw.
He massaged his temples, trying to force back the headache that
was threatening to form. The sound of cascading water as it filled the
100
Jana Downs
space, echoing off the white subway tile, didn’t help. Cody undressed
behind him, silent but very much prevalent to Rafael.
“If you want, I can just stand out here and talk to you while you
shower,” Cody offered, his voice a quiet, reassuring tone.
His chivalry was admirable but entirely unnecessary. While
Rafael had been disturbed, unnerved, and very much shaken by
today’s events, he hadn’t been broken by them. If anything he felt
motivated. It might have been an odd emotion to feel, but he was even
more tired of letting his quirks control his life than he normally was.
He wanted Cody. He was going to act on it and not worry about
whether or not he would freak out halfway through. He could trust
Cody, and that was all he really needed to know.
He shook his head. “I want you in there with me.” He turned so
that he and Cody were facing one another. The wolf sucked in a
breath, his eyes running up and down Rafael’s body in quick
succession. It was the first time he’d seen Rafael completely naked,
and Rafael knew it.
“Rafael,” he said, his voice a guttural purr of sound. “I don’t know
if I can keep things platonic right now.”
“I didn’t ask you to.” He reached out and took Cody’s hand.
Internally, the negative side of himself cried out, screaming a dozen
different reasons why willingly touching another person was a bad
idea. However, Rafael was done listening to that voice right now. He
needed this.
He pulled Cody into the shower, the warm water pelting their
bodies as steam rose around them. He grabbed his soap and poured a
generous amount into his palms before bringing them to Cody’s chest,
washing him with slow circular motions while the wolf stared at him
hungrily. It was impossible not to notice how hard Cody was. The
evidence was pointing straight out from his body toward Rafael like it
was begging to be touched.
Rafael’s arousal thickened his own prick in answer. He wasn’t
entirely sure how this was going to go, but thus far he was enjoying
Wolf at the Door
101
the hell out of himself. He circled his hand lower, intent on touching
what he’d been desperate to touch for a while now.
Cody gripped his wrist before he could wrap his fist around
Cody’s cock. “If you wash that, I’m going to fuck you. Not sure if
you’re ready for that yet.”
Rafael just raised an eyebrow and pulled his hand from Cody’s
before wrapping it around Cody’s dick. Cody groaned, the deep sound
filling the bathroom and echoing off the tile. “Sweet, you are killing
my nobility here.”
“I like the way you feel.” Cody’s skin was surprisingly soft, and
the fact that Rafael could touch him made this so much hotter. He
stroked up and down, forcing Cody up onto his tiptoes as he pleasured
him. It was an echo of what Cody had done to him in the bathroom
this morning, and Rafael was empowered that he could bring this
gorgeous, confident man to his knees.
“Rafael!” Cody gasped, reaching out and grabbing Rafael’s hand
again.
Rafael stared up at him in question.
Cody gave him an apologetic smile. “Sorry, sweet. If you keep
touching me like that I’m going to come.” He plucked the soap from
Rafael’s fingers and poured a generous amount into his palms. “Here,
let me wash you.”
Rafael’s heart pounded at the prospect. “Okay.”
Every touch of Cody’s fingertips caused him to shiver and move
into his hands like he was clay beneath a master potter. All thoughts
escaped him and he could do nothing but feel as his senses were
overwhelmed by Cody’s firm presence. This was what he needed all
day, hell, what he needed since he’d come here.
“Rafael, do you want to keep going?”
Rafael stepped back into the spray, washing the suds from his
body. He reached up and squeezed his already tightened and sensitive
nipples. He couldn’t help himself. He felt so incredibly sensual. “I
want you to wash off and then give me what I want.”
102
Jana Downs
Cody visibly shuddered. “And what is that?”
“For you to take the waterproof lube that is sitting behind my
shampoo and do what I’ve wanted you to do since this morning.” He
ran his right hand down his abdomen and wrapped it around his cock
in a bold move that surprised himself. “Fuck me.”
He was so tired of being cautious, of being safe. If something
could happen to Professor Claymore something could happen to
anyone. He needed to stop living like he was a child afraid of his own
shadow and start living like he’d wanted to when he’d left his father’s
house six years ago. He didn’t want to go slow. He didn’t want to take
his time. He wanted to take a hold of his life, seize pleasure, and
everything that came with it.
His soon-to-be lover hesitated a fraction of a second before he
nodded. “You’re sure you want to do it here?”
“I’m a water nymph, beloved. The water is where I’m most
comfortable.” When he’d had a particularly stressful day, he usually
took to his other form and simply merged with the water in his
bathtub. This was no different. He wanted to take comfort from
Cody’s body and relax in the cascade of water from the shower.
Cody nodded, reaching out and grabbing the slick from where it
rested. “Did you think about me while you were in here?”
Rafael nodded, stroking his prick as he watched Cody poor slick
onto his cock.
“Did you stroke off thinking about me? Like you did this
morning?”
Rafael stroked harder. “Yes,” he murmured, lust saturating the
word.
Cody’s nostrils flared at the admission, and a low growl of
pleasure issued from his mouth. “Good.” Rafael turned around,
offering Cody his back as he leaned forward and rested his forearms
against the tile of the shower for whatever Cody wanted to do to him.
The water sluiced down his back, following the curve of his spine.
Cody’s fingers found his pucker, smearing slick and forcing his first
Wolf at the Door
103
digit just a little bit inside, stretching him. Rafael’s cock was so hard
that it curved up toward his navel, painting his abdomen with pre-
cum. He’d never felt this good with someone else touching him. It
was like Cody had the key to the impossible task that was
accommodating Rafael’s needs.
Cody pushed a finger all the way into his ass, causing Rafael’s
mind to blank as starbursts erupted behind his eyelids.
“Yes!” This was what he wanted. His heart pounded and his hips
rocked back into Cody’s finger fucking, craving more.
Two fingers stretched him.
Then a third.
Rafael was losing his mind, his body forcing him into spheres of
pleasure he didn’t know existed. Fooling around before was really
good. I’m going to explode when he actually fucks me.
Finally, Cody seemed satisfied with his work because he pulled
his fingers free and replaced them with the thick helmet of his cock.
Rafael gasped as Cody fucked forward, pushing the first few
inches into Rafael’s tight passage. He rocked back as he had with
Cody’s fingers, begging for more incoherently as his mind splintered
under the sensual onslaught.
Rafael’s body opened for Cody like it had been made specifically
for his pleasure. Fully seated inside him, Cody growled out something
that was too guttural for Rafael to understand and pulled almost all
the way out before slamming forward once again. Pleasure streaked
up and down Rafael’s spine, settling the base of his dick. He reached
under himself with one hand and began to jerk his dick furiously,
chasing the high that came with giving in to his body’s needs.
Cody’s grip on his hips tightened. “Gonna come so hard in you,
Rafael.” The possessiveness in Cody’s voice tightened Rafael’s need
that much more. Under normal circumstances, he would’ve been
horrified at the prospect, but right now it was just hot.
“Yeah!” he gasped. “Fill me up with your cum.” He wasn’t
entirely sure where that had come from, but the words spilled from his
104
Jana Downs
mouth nonetheless. He wanted to be made a mess of but only by
Cody’s hands. In fact, that want was very, very close to need.
Cody groaned and started fucking him in earnest, their flesh
slapping together above the cacophony of sound created by the
shower. Two hard strokes sent Rafael tumbling over the edge of the
abyss, spilling his cum into the circle of his fist. But it wasn’t enough.
He needed more.
He rocked back into Cody’s body. He wanted to fall over and over
again. His body tightened as Cody’s cock slid over his internal
pleasure spot over and over. With another cry, he came so hard that he
was pretty sure he’d splintered his psyche. His body was no longer his
own. He was a slave to the desire flooding his bloodstream.
“Cody!” he screamed, coming yet again. He lost track of
everything but the feeling of Cody inside him. His oversensitized
prick begged for his hand, and Cody obliged by gripping it tightly as
he continued to pound inside him. Being a nymph had its perks when
it came to pleasure.
Finally, Cody growled out his release, cock jerking deep in the
confines of Rafael’s ass as Rafael was pushed over the edge with a
whimper. His entire body shook as he was wrung out from pleasure.
He gasped in an attempt to regain his breath. He would’ve fallen had
it not been for Cody holding him tightly and the wall’s support.
“Gods be damned,” Cody murmured, running his reverent hands
up and down Rafael’s back. “You are the hottest fuck on the planet.”
Rafael couldn’t even formulate words. It was too hard. For once in
his life he wasn’t thinking. He was only feeling, and God it felt
fantastic.
Cody’s rapidly softening cock pulled from his body, and a blush
suffused Rafael’s cheeks as some of Cody’s essence spilled from his
hole. It was dirty, but the thought didn’t come with the same anxiety it
normally did. He felt proud for some weird reason.
“You okay, Raf?” Cody asked.
Wolf at the Door
105
Speaking. Words. Have to do that. He grunted. That was the best
he could do. The water cooled gradually, warning him that the hot
water was quickly running out.
“Hm, I’ll take that as an ‘all right.’” Cody pulled him up and
quickly and efficiently rewashed his vital bits.
He stepped from the shower before lifting Raf down onto the
towel they’d laid out there. The second Cody let go, Raf’s legs gave
out. It was only Cody’s quick reflexes that kept him off the floor.
Cody swung him up in his arms, pressing a soft kiss to Rafael’s
mouth. Rafael reached up and wrapped his arms around Cody’s neck
before pulling him down for a longer kiss. Cody obliged him, kissing
him softly as he walked back into Rafael’s room.
Rafael had never really been able to kiss before. The whole idea
of another person’s tongue near his had freaked him out. All his
worries, anxieties, and voices of protest were blissfully silent. He
kissed Cody like he was an oxygen mask to an underwater diver. He
thrived off the touch.
The mattress lay on the floor since they’d had to remove the
broken frame, and Cody knelt on it before depositing Rafael on its
center, regretfully breaking their kiss.
“Let me grab a couple towels to dry us off,” Cody murmured,
straightening. He turned, and Rafael admired the hard muscle of
Cody’s ass as he retreated back into the shower room. He sighed,
happy. If he would’ve known sex could’ve been that good, he
would’ve searched the world over to experience it much sooner.
Cody returned with some clean towels, and he took a moment to
dry off the both of them before tossing them aside.
“You okay?” he asked again as he looked down at Rafael, a
worried look on his face.
Rafael nodded. “When can we do that again?”
Cody laughed, relief evident on his face. “You’re going to have to
give me a minute but relatively soon.”
106
Jana Downs
“Good.” Awesome in fact. The daunting world of sensuality no
longer seemed inaccessible but insanely desirable. “That was…” He
didn’t even have an adequate word for what had just happened to his
body.
Cody’s lips twitched upward into a grin. “Good?”
“Yeah,” he said, unable to be more articulate than that. Cody
pulled him into his arms, and Rafael rested his head on Cody’s chest.
He smelled like Rafael’s soap.
“This okay?” Cody asked.
“Yes.” He snuggled closer. “I like it.”
“That’s great. No worries?”
“None.” He lifted his head to look at Cody. “I think I found a way
to cure my anxiety.”
Cody laughed. “Fucking?”
He nodded, hope blossoming in his chest. “I feel so good right
now.”
“Don’t get ahead of yourself, sweet,” Cody said, tempering
Rafael’s enthusiasm with a dose of caution. “It’s great that we’re able
to touch like this, but that doesn’t mean your anxieties are gone. Even
if there are times when you’re not able to lay in my arms, I want you
to know that I enjoy every second spent with you, and I will be by
your side no matter what.” That pledge was softly spoken, a promise
that made Rafael’s heart skip a beat.
It was so easy to fall for this man. Rafael had never met anyone
like him. Cody was a cut above everyone else. Rafael only regretted
that they hadn’t been experiencing this every day since they’d met.
“Cody?”
Cody traced a pattern along Rafael’s spine. “What is it, sweet?”
“I want you to fall in love with me.” The order was an admission
of all the uncertainties that Rafael felt on a day-to-day basis. It was a
confession of insecurity and one he knew Cody would honor.
“Well, I want you to love me too, sweet,” Cody said, squeezing
him tightly. “Do you think you can manage?”
Wolf at the Door
107
I think I already have.
108
Jana Downs
Chapter Nine
Cody heard the rumble of an unfamiliar car engine as it pulled
into the parking spot beside Rafael’s compact. He tensed, looking up
from the paperwork he was filling out for the private detective. As
promised, Rafael had put him into contact with the private detective
who worked about forty-five minutes away in the nearest city. Cody
just had to finish the paperwork and send it off to him.
Rafael’s life was kind of on hold since his overseeing professor
could no longer monitor his thesis project. He was still waiting to hear
from the head of the anthropology department concerning who was
going to be his lead now. Though he was still working diligently on
his studies, despite Cody’s reservations about the whole thing, he
seemed to be agitated with the limbo. He could be surprisingly
stubborn when it came to his studies and his subsequent work on the
subject.
Since the police couldn’t really find any definitive link between
the two events, Rafael used the fact as proof that it was just a random
burglary. And he was right in the fact that they only took the most
valuable objects in the house which were his laptop and external hard
drive. However, Cody found it odd that the “thieves” left the
television, choosing to break it instead of taking it with them. The fact
that his hard copies of notes were missing as well gave more credence
to Cody’s theory, but Rafael was having none of it.
However, other than that minor disagreement, they were getting
along very well. It seemed very natural for the two of them to be in a
relationship. Despite their differences, they seemed very compatible.
Wolf at the Door
109
Of course he had known that for a couple weeks, but it was nice to get
the affirmation with the addition of their sexual relationship.
He now understood the meaning of the word “nymphomaniac.”
Rafael was insatiable when it came to sex. He still had some minor
hiccups as far as cleanliness and oral interaction went. However, most
of his hang-ups could be worked around so long as they were in what
were becoming Cody’s favorite rooms in the house, the bathrooms.
The slam of a car door made him get to his feet and grab the metal
bat he’d insisted on buying at the store. Neither he nor Rafael liked
guns, but the aluminum bat, when swung by a shape-shifter, could do
a fair amount of damage.
The knock sounded on the front door.
“Who’s that?” Rafael called from the kitchen. He was doing his
daily routine of scrubbing the floors from one end of the house to the
other.
“Don’t know. Let me check,” Cody said over his shoulder.
He looked through the eyehole and saw a guy who looked a little
older than Cody sitting on the porch in a leather vest and blue jeans.
He’d never seen the guy before.
“Who is it?” he called through the door. He paid a witch to ward
the place a few days ago, so there was no way he was opening the
door unless he had good reason to.
“If you are the Forgotten, Cody Ambrewster, then I am your new
Sentinel.” The guy crossed his arms over his chest, looking at the
peephole like he could see Cody behind it. “We need to talk.”
New Sentinel? He hadn’t found his old one.
He unlocked the door and pulled it open but not all the way. “My
Sentinel’s name is Russell. I don’t need another one. Who the fuck
are you?”
The stranger’s nose wrinkled, disdain written all over his
expression. “I am Leeland Dégas, and I was sent here to inform you
that your former Sentinel passed away the day before you were to turn
in a vehicle accident.”
110
Jana Downs
The words hit Cody like a blow. It couldn’t be true. Russell was a
badass witch who had gotten so many awards for his talent that every
time he decorated his room one wall always looked like a shrine to his
accomplishments.
“I’m sorry for your loss,” the guy continued. “Your Sentinel was a
good and loyal man worthy of your grief. If it gives you any comfort,
from what I understand he died almost instantly.” The one downside
to immortality was that all immortals could be killed even if the
methods varied somewhat.
Cody shook his head. “That’s impossible. He was a damn good
witch.” There had to have been some sort of spell, some sort of
incantation that would’ve saved him.
Leeland nodded. “He was. However, it is very difficult to do any
sort of magic when you’re thrown through a windshield.” The
unsympathetic and nonchalant manner that he said it really pissed
Cody off.
“Go fuck yourself,” Cody snarled, stepping back so he could slam
the door in the stupid asshole’s face. The guy put his foot in the door
to stop it.
“Look, I know you were upset about your friend, but I’m here to
help you. I have all his notes and everything else that I need to take
care of you as your Sentinel.” He held out a business card. “This is
where I’m staying and my number’s on it. I’ll leave you alone for
right now, but in the next few days you and I need to talk about what
we’re going to do for the remainder of your time and how we’re going
to go about getting you out there and meeting people.”
Cody sneered. “I’m with my boyfriend and we’re very happy.
What I do with my curse in my life is my business. Go fuck yourself.”
The repetition wasn’t exactly his most thought-out retort, but it was
the one that gave him the most satisfaction.
He snatched the card from Leeland’s hand just to get him out of
the doorway and then promptly shut it. A few seconds later he heard
Wolf at the Door
111
the unfamiliar car’s engine start and then the gravel crunched as he
pulled out.
Cody just continued to stare at the door, his chest tight with pain.
Russell had been his best friend, his one link to the world when the
world went on without him. To know that he was dead…To know that
it’d taken them this long to either find out about it or to tell Cody just
royally pissed him off. He didn’t even know where the guy’s body
was, where he was buried, anything. He swallowed as tears threatened
to clog his throat as well. He didn’t even know how to get in touch
with his parents. Russell knew everything.
His vision blurred, and it took him a second to realize that it was
tears that were blinding him. He’d really wanted Russell to meet
Rafael. Russell would’ve really liked him. He would’ve said
something dumb like “it’s about time you found someone to put up
with your shit” or something else equally as insulting and
affectionate.
The soft touch on his back made him stiffen. “What’s wrong?”
Rafael asked.
“Russell.” He swallowed, unable to force the words out of his
mouth. He didn’t want to cry like a kid, but he had the sneaking
suspicion he was going to do just that. “He’s gone.” The words were
choked, more sobs than anything else. His worst expectations from
Russell’s disappearance had come true. At least when he hadn’t
known he had some sort of hope that Russell had just forgotten what
year it was or something like that.
“Oh, Cody…”
He couldn’t handle Rafael’s sympathy right now. He couldn’t
handle explaining his crying or anything else that came with human
interaction. “I’ve got to go.” He needed to get out of here. He needed
to run.
“Where are you going to go?” Rafael asked, sounding alarmed at
the prospect.
112
Jana Downs
“To my wolves.” They were the only thing familiar he had around
here. They wouldn’t judge him, wouldn’t try to offer anything but the
most minimal of comforts, touch, warmth. He could handle that.
“At least let me give you a ride,” Rafael said. He paused. “I’m so
sorry, Cody. I know that it doesn’t help to know that, but I am.”
Cody sighed. “It’s okay. I know you’re trying to help. I just need
some space right now.” He cared about Rafael so much. He was the
best thing in his life. But even his human understanding of grief and
loss was too much. “Keep the door locked while I’m gone.”
“When will you be back?”
He shrugged. He didn’t know, but he knew if he didn’t get out
right this second he was going to lose his mind. “Soon.” With that he
pulled open the door and stepped outside, shutting it definitively
behind him. He just needed to breathe.
* * * *
Rafael didn’t start to worry until the sun went down. Everyone
grieved differently. Some people grieved by crying, some by busying
themselves with other things to keep their minds off of it. There were
a variety of ways to go about the grieving process. Rafael understood
that logically. It didn’t mean that Cody’s rejection hadn’t hurt and that
him leaving didn’t bother him on a fundamental level.
He spent a fitful might tossing and turning in his bed, missing the
warm presence of his lover beside him. He finally gave up trying to
sleep at 4:00 a.m. and made his way downstairs. A lot had happened
in the past few days, and none of it was particularly good, minus him
and Cody’s hooking up.
He opened his mail and found a correspondence from Professor
Flint’s e-mail address. He and the Oklahoma University professor had
been swapping e-mails for a few days going over what he and
Professor Claymore had spoken about in the days leading up to his
death. The conversations were very professional and revolved around
Wolf at the Door
113
his paper, but it was so strange knowing that Professor Claymore
wouldn’t offer any sort of opinion on their conversation.
Flint had been kind enough to give him some feedback on the
paper that he was working on in between the time that the
anthropology chair assigned him a new overseeing professor. Lucky
for him he kept a backup he’d attached to his keys.
He scanned the mail quickly. A shiver of unease went down his
spine. He’d almost let himself believe that Professor Claymore’s
death and the break-in at his house had been a coincidence, but this
letter made him think otherwise.
To whom it may concern,
We regret to inform you that Professor Flint will no longer be a
part of OU’s anthropology department. He passed away last night
unexpectedly. All further professional questions may be addressed to
the department’s chair, Professor Rowling, whose e-mail address can
be found at the bottom of this letter. All personal correspondences
will be forwarded on to Professor Flint’s heirs. Our deepest
condolences are with the families and friends of Dr. Flint.
With our greatest sympathies,
Jacob Rowling
Department chair, Anthropological Studies, Oklahoma University
Raw fear bubbled up in Rafael’s chest. He really wished Cody
was here right now. The laptop he purchased to replace his old one
was of little comfort in an empty house. He chewed on his fingernail,
a habit he hadn’t done since he’d left his father’s house.
He Googled newspapers around the Oklahoma University area.
What he found there gave him no comfort at all. The headline of the
school newspaper was terrifying. Beloved professor found dead
outside local pizzeria. He scanned the article. Causes unknown. No
114
Jana Downs
one was saying anything. Usually that meant something like murder.
Just like Professor Claymore.
He picked up his keys from the bowl he kept them in, taking off
the flash drive. He stared down at the deceptively innocent black and
red plastic device. Something on this flash drive had gotten two
people killed and his house wrecked. He didn’t think he was being
paranoid to think so. His first thought was to go to the police, but he
imagined that this was far beyond the expertise of a couple of small-
town human police officers. This wasn’t a big city, and they had no
Nightkin division to handle cases like this.
He reattached the flash drive to his keychain and placed it back in
the bowl. He shut the laptop and made his way back upstairs. He
crawled into the bed he shared with Cody and hugged Cody’s pillow
to his face, inhaling the scent of his lover in an effort to comfort
himself. Cody was right. He just really wished that he was here to say
I told you so.
* * * *
“What do you mean you’re not going after him?” Rafael
demanded, glaring at the man who claimed to be Cody’s Sentinel.
He’d found the man’s card earlier and decided to drop by in an effort
to garner some sort of support. Leeland was about as useful as a boxer
at a knife fight.
The man, who was some sort of a fae by the feel of him, looked
down his nose at Rafael. “I don’t have to answer to a little traitor like
you. My responsibility and my loyalty is to the Forgotten that I’m
assigned. What business of mine is it that he left you alone?”
“He’s been in the woods for days and hasn’t come home.” He
chose to ignore the jab. It was a well-known fact that most fae lived in
Europe. Correction, all fae who wanted to lockstep with the traditions
of the courts and all the other social hierarchies they loved so much
Wolf at the Door
115
lived in Europe. Outcasts went elsewhere. It was pretty easy to figure
out which set Rafael belonged to.
“So?”
Rafael made a noise of frustration. “Forget it. I’ll go find him
myself.”
“I hope he doesn’t let himself fall to your level. You’ll bring him
nothing but misery.”
Rafael furrowed his brow as he frowned. “I will not.”
“You’re already putting him in danger, you fool.” The Sentinel
turned and shut himself back in his room.
He turned on his heel and headed back toward the parking lot. The
only hotel in town wasn’t exactly the Ritz, and he was eager to get out
of it anyway. He slammed his car door behind him before peeling out
of the parking lot.
“Well that was fucking useless,” he muttered to himself, gripping
his steering wheel.
He wasn’t even entirely sure how he was going to find Cody
considering he got himself lost in the woods last time he’d tried. But
he had to try. Not only because he was afraid Cody was somewhere
alone and hurting but because Rafael was scared to go home and be
by himself. His anxiety was so bad that he couldn’t stay still, couldn’t
help but clean every second that he was in his house. Coupled with
his paranoia every creak, groan, and squeal he heard was an assassin
coming to get him. He’d had no sleep in the two days since Cody had
disappeared to God knew where.
He parked in the same parking lot that he had the last time he’d
driven up here and cut the engine. He sat there for a minute, staring at
the logo on his steering wheel. He felt so lost. For someone who had
spent the greater part of the last six years of his life by himself, he felt
rather hopeless right now.
He managed to force himself out of the car and out into the
parking lot. He had his gardening gloves on but had somehow
misplaced his beekeeping hat. The prospect of traipsing through the
116
Jana Downs
woods without it was daunting, but he needed Cody more than he
needed to be clean. It was a terrifying realization.
When he found Cody, he was going to throttle him and then tell
him that he cared too much about him to put up with this shit. Far too
soon for Rafael’s comfort, the pavement ended, and the dirt trail
began.
* * * *
Hours later, he was covered in sweat, thirsty as all get out, and
terrified he was covered in a fine sheen of dust. “Cody, I’m going to
murder you.” He ducked under a low-hanging branch, and his skin
crawled as imaginary insects held onto his shirt collar. He repeated
the mantra he’d been keeping up for the past half hour.
“I am a nymph. I am the descendent of a fertility God. I am one
with nature.”
“So does that mean we can go camping sometime?” a familiar
voice said from somewhere in the bush.
Rafael’s head snapped up in time to see Cody flanked by two
wolves step out from around a set of trees toward the left of the path.
He was shirtless, smeared with dirt, with only a pair of jeans and
boots on.
He knelt, picked up a rock, and then tossed it at his lover’s head.
Cody dodged it but barely.
“You scared me to death!” he snapped. Rage that he’d kept in
careful check for two days bubbled over. “When you say you are
going to leave, you come back relatively soon!” He knelt, picked up
another rock and tossed it. “You have no idea how worried I’ve
been!”
“Worried enough to throw rocks at me?” Cody asked, laughter
and disbelief in his tone. “I’m sorry! Just stop throwing things at me.”
Rafael threw one more.
Wolf at the Door
117
He crossed his arms over his chest, hugging himself. “You’re such
an ass.”
Cody nodded, his expression sobering. “I know. I’m sorry. I just
got so upset about Russell.” At the mention of his friend’s name he
looked even more crestfallen. “I needed to go running wild for a few
days. But I shouldn’t have made you worry, so I’m sorry.”
Before it really registered what he was doing, Rafael threw
himself at Cody. The wolf caught him in his arms, the real wolves on
either side of him growling in question. Cody held him tight, kissing
his temple as he held on for dear life.
“I’m sorry about your friend,” Rafael repeated for perhaps the
hundredth time. “I’m just so scared.”
“Did something happen?” Cody asked. His skin smelled like dirt.
Rafael was going to have to scrub him from top to bottom.
Rafael extricated himself from Cody’s grip. “Professor Flint, the
one who was helping Professor Claymore with his study, is dead. I
got an e-mail about it late last night. I think you were right, Cody. I
don’t think anyone wants people to know about the Forgotten.”
Cody frowned, eyes widening in surprise. “Gods. I’m so sorry I
left you alone. ”
“It’s okay.” Rafael sighed. It wasn’t Cody’s fault that someone
was doing a good imitation of a psycho. “I just don’t know what to
do.”
“Well, you clearly can’t publish your paper,” Cody said. “I’m not
risking your life for anything.”
“What if it’s too late?” Rafael asked. “What if they have a hit out
on me or something?”
“I want to tease you about that statement, but I’m not sure if that’s
an exaggeration. I don’t know, babe. All we can do is wait. I do know
that we can’t stay at your place anymore, and I would suggest taking a
leave of absence from school until we figure everything out.”
As much as he didn’t want to do the latter, Rafael agreed. “Where
are we going to go?”
118
Jana Downs
It wasn’t a question anymore if they were going to go together.
Cody was stuck with him. Rafael had let him into the protective
bubble he surrounded himself with, so he was going to have to deal
with it.
“I’m going to get us a place, somewhere secluded. Hopefully
whoever this is doesn’t have any info on me since I’m a new addition
in your life.” He gave Rafael’s hand a squeeze. “Don’t worry, babe.
We’ll take care of this together.”
Rafael hoped so. “I love you, Cody.”
Cody looked startled by the admission, but a smile came on the
heels of the surprise. “Thank you, sweet. I love you, too.” He pulled
him into a hug despite the fact that Rafael struggled to get away from
his dirt. “Does this mean you’re going to get a claiming mark with
me?”
“Yes,” Rafael said, ducking under his arms. “But only if you stop
touching me until you’ve washed off.” Any body of water would do
so long as it got him clean.
Cody chuckled. He turned his attention to his wolves and gave
them a low rumble that had to mean something to them because they
turned in unison and took off through the forest. Cody turned his
attention back to Rafael. “Come along, sweet.”
Rafael frowned, confused. “But my car is the other way.” He
pointed back toward the trail he’d been on. He could’ve sworn that he
wasn’t as confused this time out. He’d been very careful.
Cody shook his head. “We’re not going to your car just yet. I need
to wash off and you’re going to come with me.”
Rafael followed, intrigued by the prospect. He’d never really
experienced Cody’s world and he felt like it was only fair that he at
least attempt it.
“Is there a lake through here?”
“Nah. There is a little waterfall and pool just a quarter mile up the
hill.” Cody’s wide shoulders were tanned from the days in the sun,
Wolf at the Door
119
gorgeously so. If anything it made him look even more masculine and
wild than he normally did.
He tripped over a root and nearly face planted in the forest
undergrowth. Okay, Rafael, pay a little bit more attention before you
kill yourself trying to ogle his ass.
Rafael’s mind descended into the gutter and stayed there through
the rest of their hike to the waterfall. He was beginning to doubt
they’d ever get there when they turned a corner and suddenly they
were there. The trees opened up to reveal a small rocky clearing and a
steep rock embankment where a stream of water twice as wide as
Rafael was tall cascaded down the rock face to pool at the base about
half a foot deep. The crystal-clear water coupled with the sound was
very relaxing.
“It’s pretty here,” he said as Cody immediately plowed into the
water.
“It is. None of the tourists want to come this far off the trail.”
Cody turned back toward Rafael. “You look pretty sweaty. Why don’t
you join me? Just lay your clothes against the rocks.”
Rafael hesitated for a second before he steeled himself against the
possibility of contaminants and wrestled himself out of his clothes.
Despite the heat of the day, he shivered as he stepped into the freezing
cold water. The rocks were surprisingly slippery against his feet so he
slipped a few times before he made it over to Cody.
Cody smiled as he pulled Rafael under the spray, pressing a chaste
kiss to his mouth. “How’s this for an outdoor shower?” he asked over
the roar of water.
“Hm, I think an outdoor shower misses the point of hygiene being
outside.” He leaned his head against Cody’s chest. “I missed you,
jerk.”
“I missed you too. The only thing better would have been falling
asleep next to you at night.”
Rafael kissed Cody’s chest. “Then you should have come home.”
“I promise not to leave like that again.”
120
Jana Downs
He’d better keep that promise because saying ‘I love you’ was a
big deal for Rafael. “Let me get you cleaned up,” Rafael said.
Cody chuckled. “All right. Fine. Clean me.”
Rafael looked up at his lover. Cody clearly had no idea how he
was going to do that. It would certainly wipe the smug look off
Cody’s face. Rafael let his shape waver like a ripple on a pond, his
cells vibrating with magic as he took the form he was given to change
into.
Cody yelped as his arms were suddenly filled by a pure water
version of Rafael. Rafael would’ve laughed if he could’ve but being
made of water deprived him of vocal cords. He still had all the feeling
of his human form but didn’t have a solid shape. He grinned up at his
lover and ran his hands over Cody’s chest to wash away the dirt there.
“Oh my gods,” Cody said, eyes darkening in pleasure as Rafael
ran his hands lower. The way Cody’s cock stirred at the touch gave
Rafael a wicked idea.
Rafael went to his knees. In this form he wasn’t as concerned
about getting dirty. After all, he could just swap out the water in his
body with clean water from the falls anyway.
He wrapped his liquid lips around Cody’s half-hard cock and sank
down on his length. Cody’s gasp was encouraging so he pulled back
and did it again.
“Fuck!” Cody gasped. “Raf!”
Pride infused him. He was driving Cody’s pleasure, in charge of
their lovemaking for the first time and loving it. He continued to suck,
using his powers to keep the water flowing over his lover’s prick.
His own body was miserably tight, the sounds Cody was making
driving him crazier than any touch would have at that moment. He
pulled off of Cody’s cock with an audible pop and looked up. Cody’s
face was flushed and he was panting like he was running a marathon.
“Sweet?” Cody asked, running his hand over Rafael’s watery face.
Rafael gave him a smile.
Wolf at the Door
121
He flowed into Cody’s arms, wrapping his legs around Cody’s
hips and his arms around his lover’s shoulders.
Cody couldn’t hold onto him so he just grabbed the rocks behind
him in an attempt to steady himself. “Rafael, you sure?”
He nodded. He was so damn hot right now that if he didn’t get
Cody inside him he was liable to turn to steam and float away. Cody
groaned as Rafael reached down and gripped his cock.
“Raf,” he panted as Rafael sank down on Cody’s thick dick.
The hard dick stretched him deliciously, slick rendered
unnecessary by his watery state and his ability to mold himself around
Cody’s body perfectly. He steadied himself on his lover’s body before
he began bouncing up and down on Cody’s cock. He gave a silent
moan as pleasure streaked up and down his own cock in answer.
“So good,” Cody rumbled, his hips pushing up into him harder as
he rode him. “Damn, Raf.”
Rafael’s body rubbed against Cody with each downward plunge
of his hips and it wasn’t long before orgasm was pushing him closer
to that inevitable edge. He held onto his sanity by his fingernails as he
concentrated on giving Cody as much pleasure as possible before he
lost it. He whimpered, tightening his body around Cody’s cock.
“Gonna come,” Cody gasped, eyes wild.
It was what Rafael had needed to hear. As Cody bucked into him,
spilling his essence into Rafael’s milking body, Rafael followed him
over the edge. As his cum erupted from his tip, he lost control of his
form, dissolving into a puddle and falling into the pool beneath their
feet.
“Rafael!” Cody yelled, alarm evident in every line of his body.
Rafael allowed himself to be pulled along in the current for a
moment, reveling in his intense release before he literally pulled
himself together again. He broke the surface of the pool a few feet
away and then pushed himself to his feet, regaining his human shape
as he did so.
122
Jana Downs
“Sorry. I couldn’t help it,” he said, a little embarrassed that he’d
lost his shape like that.
Cody walked over to him and wrapped his arms around his
shoulders. “Sweet, that was fucking amazing.”
Rafael relaxed. “Thank you. I really enjoyed it. Can we do it again
like that?” He’d never emerged from sex feeling so clean.
Cody chuckled. “Yes, please.”
He knew at that moment that Cody really was the perfect man for
him. He understood Rafael in a fundamental way that went beyond
superficial needs. He sighed. He just hoped that he hadn’t really put
himself on the chopping block before he got his happily ever after.
Wolf at the Door
123
Chapter Ten
“Gather up your things, sweet,” Cody commanded as they came
through the front door at Raf’s house.
“I need a bath first,” Rafael said, looking like he was going to
dissolve into a hissy fit if he didn’t get some relief soon. The hike out
had been a sweaty affair and his lack of headgear had led to him
getting smacked in the face by a few low branches.
Cody sighed. “Fine. But be quick about it, all right?” His
fastidious lover could get very frustrating, so it was a good thing that
he loved the man to pieces. He hadn’t expected to confess to his
feelings so soon, but when Rafael had stood in the middle of the
forest, sweaty, ill, and panicky, throwing rocks and saying “I love
yous,” he’d been sold.
He went to his old room and put his things in a bag, what few
items he owned. He wasn’t going to bother taking any of Rafael’s
linens or anything. They could buy new ones just as soon as they
figured out where they were going. There was a real estate magazine
at the little diner he liked to go to, so he imagined there were some
places there that might be good. An all-cash offer usually moved
things along quicker than usual, so in theory they should be good. The
hotels in Cherokee would be a little less conspicuous than the single
hotel in town, so that was the game plan.
He tied the end of his plastic bag of clothes and headed into the
next room to get some of Rafael’s. He could hear the shower going in
his bathroom and shook his head at his lover. Priorities, his lover had
them. They just got mixed up sometimes. Gods knew he needed a
124
Jana Downs
shower himself, but he didn’t feel comfortable enough staying here to
go there.
After he got his lover’s clothes he headed downstairs, knowing his
lover would need the million and five wet wipes and gloves he kept
stashed under the sink. It was minimal packing, but it was still more
than Cody really wanted to do. They could get someone to come get
the rest later.
The fine hairs on the back of his neck rose an instant before he felt
the cold press of metal against the base of his skull.
“Don’t fucking move,” an unfamiliar voice rumbled. “Where is
the nymph?”
Cody didn’t say anything as his mind raced. The metal bit into the
soft skin above his spine.
“Where the fuck is the nymph? Is he upstairs?”
He sniffed the air. Fae. Some kind of fae. And clearly some kind
of fae who could get around the damn ward that he’d paid out the ass
to get put around the house. He had to be some kind of very powerful
fae. Not the Sentinel. Not a nymph like Rafael.
“Whatever it is you want, we’ll give it to you. We don’t want any
trouble. We’re leaving. We just want to go live our lives elsewhere.”
“Where is the rest of the research?” the stranger demanded,
irritation lacing his words. “The e-mails said there was a jump drive
with the backup information.”
“I don’t know about any backup information,” Cody said, trying
to remain calm. “You took the laptop.”
“No! The e-mails said there was a backup! I don’t have a lot of
time. I have to get it.”
What the fuck was going on? “Look, Rafael will be here in a
minute and we can give you whatever you want.”
“They already called the wraith because of the humans. They
didn’t want to talk either. I have nothing to lose.” It sounded like a
threat, but Cody couldn’t be sure. “It nearly caught up with me in
Oklahoma, but I got away.”
Wolf at the Door
125
And what the hell is a wraith? And who the hell sent it after this
guy? “Okay, buddy, take it easy.”
“Cody!” Rafael’s cry made Cody wince.
“Give me the jump drive!” the stranger snarled. “Whatever copies
of the information you have, give it to me now. I’m a dead man, but I
won’t let them kill my little brother over you.”
“You can have it,” Rafael said, panic in his voice. “The jump
drive is all I have. All my data. You can have it, just leave him alone.”
“I tried to warn you. You can’t tell anyone, don’t you understand?
You can’t fucking tell anyone!” The guy grabbed Cody by the
shoulder and gave him a push so that he stumbled toward Rafael, who
was standing in the doorway between the living room and kitchen.
“Where is it?” The guy was burly, taller than Cody by a head at least,
and had the craziest eyes of anyone he’d ever seen.
Rafael reached into his pockets, hands shaking, and pulled out his
keys. He pulled off the jump drive that Cody hadn’t even noticed
before and tossed it to him. “There. That’s everything.”
Cody caught a flicker of movement on the steps by the back door.
He held his breath. Another bad guy or some help?
“I can’t be sure,” the guy muttered, seemingly talking to himself.
“I can’t.” His expression turned stone cold. “I’m sorry.” He raised the
gun and pointed it at Rafael.
The back door exploded as a gush of wind burst into the kitchen
with the force of a cannon. It knocked Cody and Rafael to their backs
as it formed a vortex around the gunman.
Cody’s Sentinel stepped through the back door right behind it,
eyes leveled on the stranger. The tornado tossed the guy into the wall
twice before it disappeared. Rafael stared at the fallen man as Leeland
kicked the gun to the side.
Cody looked up at his Sentinel. “Thanks. Is he dead?”
“No but he won’t last much longer either way.” Leeland inclined
his head toward the door. “Take your lover and go. I’ll catch up with
the both of you tonight.”
126
Jana Downs
He was moving before Leeland finished speaking. Every instinct
in him demanded he get his lover somewhere safe. He paused as
Rafael gathered up their bags of clothes.
He turned. “You knew all along about this guy or else you
wouldn’t have been watching my house.”
Leeland nodded. “I don’t interfere unless it can cause direct harm
to you. I wasn’t sure until you came back with him that you two were
really going to be together for the long haul. So get the claiming
tattoo taken care of sooner rather than later so I can report back to my
superiors that I interfered for the right reasons, please.”
“What the hell was all that about?” Cody snapped, waving his
hand to indicate everything that had happened. “That guy killed two
people.”
“Two humans. I know. I was informed that he would be executed
via a wraith, so I didn’t worry about it.” Leeland’s eyes drifted to
Rafael. “The man was commissioned by the council of elders to make
sure none of your research saw the light of day and they are not to be
played around with.”
Rafael visibly paled. “You’re kidding me. The fae elders are the
ones that are trying to sabotage me?”
Leeland nodded. “I would suggest you stay quiet from now on
about the Forgotten, boy. They aren’t just called that because they’ve
faded from human memory. They must be erased until they’ve been
redeemed. It’s part of their curse, and anyone who interferes risks the
wrath of the ancestors. You were interfering.”
“Fuck the ancestors!” Cody snapped. “They send someone after
my lover or me again and there will be hell to pay.” He wasn’t a
violent man, but he would be if they tried to hurt the man he loved
again.
Leeland inclined his head. “I’ll let them know you think that. I
take that to mean that you won’t need my services as a Sentinel
anymore?”
Wolf at the Door
127
“Fuck. You.” He ushered Rafael toward the door. “If I ever see
you again, I’ll beat the living hell out of you.”
Rafael dug his heels in when they reached the door though,
turning around to look at Leeland again. “What about him? How
could they kill humans? It’s forbidden!”
“They didn’t kill humans,” Leeland sniffed, looking disgusted by
the whole thing. He motioned to the unconscious man. “Lindel’s
brother was taken hostage because Lindel broke fae law. He’s set to
be executed but the ancestors on the council said they would show
leniency if Lindel retrieved all the research you’d conducted and
scared you off pursuing it. The idiot decided killing a human and
another Sentinel was a good way to scare you and get all your
research at the same time.” He sighed. “A wraith has been called to
take care of him.”
Rafael visibly paled. “All this was because the council didn’t want
anyone to know.”
Leeland ignored the accusation. “It’s the way of things. Now get
out of here. The wraith won’t be long.”
“Come on, babe,” Cody rumbled, tugging on Rafael’s hand. He
would drag his ass out if he had to. Finally, Rafael let him pull him
out.
It wasn’t until they were both in the car and on the road that he
allowed himself to breathe.
“Holy shit,” he murmured, staring out the window as the miles
between them and the townhouse grew.
“That isn’t right,” Rafael said, his knuckles white on the wheel.
“That isn’t right how they punish you guys.”
Tell me about it. “It’s okay, babe. I don’t need you to right the
wrongs of the world. I just need you to be mine.” He’d forbid him
from righting wrongs if that meant he put himself in danger.
Rafael hesitated for a second before he nodded. “Okay. No more
trying to publish anything about the Forgotten under my name.”
128
Jana Downs
“Thank you.” Cody swallowed. “I don’t know what I would’ve
done if I would’ve lost you, too. Raf, sweet, you’re everything to me.”
Rafael’s expression softened. “And you’re everything to me. Even
if we are outlaws for some unbeknownst reason.”
No matter where they went or what they had to deal with, they
could face it together. If they could survive this, they could survive
anything. “How do you feel about a quiet life up on a mountain
somewhere?” Even if the ancestors were done with Rafael now, Cody
didn’t trust it. He wanted to keep Rafael away from anything that
might remind them of his existence.
“Sounds like a fucking fantastic idea.” As per usual when Rafael
cursed, he got Cody’s attention.
“No more adventures?”
“No more. I promise.” He paused. “Unless they’re with you and
are sexual in nature.”
Cody chuckled. “Good.”
“Hey, Cody?”
“Yes?”
“If I hadn’t started this project, Professor Claymore wouldn’t
have—”
“Don’t you dare finish that sentence,” Cody warned. “You had
nothing to do with that psycho killing people. You’re right. It isn’t
fair what they did and continue to do to the Forgotten. Maybe once
things are settled down we can figure out how to get the information
out there without stepping into the line of fire ourselves. Okay?”
Rafael nodded. “I love you, Cody.”
“Love you, too, sweet.” Until the moon faded from the sky and
the wolves no longer sang, he would love him. Forever.
Wolf at the Door
129
Epilogue
It was finished. Rafael sat back and looked at his work at the
kitchen table, the wide windows of the cabin looking out over the
rolling hills of the Appalachian mountain range. Their hidden retreat
far away from civilization was exactly where he needed to be.
The website he’d put together outlined everything he knew
offhand about the Forgotten and offered a place for others to add their
information to the long list. It had only been up a week and already
others were coming forward with their stories, telling the interweb
exactly what had been hidden for so long.
He touched the screen as he read the dedication at the top. To
those who lost their lives in the pursuit of truth and the protection of
the Forgotten. We thank you.
It wasn’t much and it certainly didn’t make up for the deaths, but
it was all he had to give. Cody had come up with the idea, and it had
made him feel just the slightest bit better about everything that had
happened.
The howls of wolves sounded as he reached for his coffee cup.
“They’re calling you,” he said over his shoulder. His lover chugged
orange juice out of the carton, making Raf wince. He hated when he
did that.
“I know,” Cody said, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.
The pack needed an extra hunter this winter since it was such a harsh
one, and any excuse to resume his animal form on a whim was
something Cody acted on.
“Be safe today,” Rafael said. He had plenty to keep himself
occupied with, including the freelance editing for the technical
130
Jana Downs
manual the company he was working for sent over last minute. It
wasn’t his dream job, but it contributed, which was all he wanted.
“I will.” Cody circled the island to come over to the kitchen table
and pressed a kiss to Rafael’s face.
“The chat room for the Forgotten goes live tonight,” Rafael said.
“There are already a hundred people signed up, Nightkin and human
alike.” The legend had intrigued quite a few people.
“Good,” Cody said, nuzzling his cheek. “Maybe there will be
another Forgotten other than me there to talk to people. That would be
nice.”
“Do you think an anonymous website is really enough to bring
awareness?” The thing was encrypted by the best in the business, so it
was as close to anonymous as it got on the Internet. His name wasn’t
on anything and he hadn’t really provided many concrete facts but he
hoped the message got across anyway.
Cody shrugged. “We’ll find out. If nothing else, the truth is out
there for people who want to find it and the Forgotten can take solace
in the fact that they aren’t entirely forgotten by everyone else.”
The wolves howled again, impatient.
Rafael waved him on, reaching up to touch the claiming tattoo
that decorated Cody’s cheek. “Go on, then. Your friends are waiting.”
He could spare his lover for the day. After all, at the end of the
day, they’d be together for eternity.
“Love you, sweet.”
“Love you, too, Cody.”
THE END
WWW.JANADOWNS.COM
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Jana Downs lives in the beautiful mountains of Western North
Carolina with three cats, one dog, several dozen fish, and a very
understanding partner-in-crime who hates to read but makes
exceptions for her stories.
You can usually find her either watching bad reality TV, buying
way too many books on Amazon, or dreaming up another man or two
to occupy her time because life is good but several drop-dead
gorgeous nonexistent men is just better.
For all titles by Jana Downs, please visit
www.bookstrand.com/jana-downs
Siren Publishing, Inc.
www.SirenPublishing.com