1

( Branwen777)

And you neglected I called you out don't please

I said we're stronger than this now

You resurrected mistakes years past it seemed

And they exist to still haunt you

And still you feel like the loneliness

Is better replaced by this

I don't believe it this way

And I can see the fear in your eyes

I've seen it materialize

Growing stronger each day

I could see it as you turned to stone

Still clearly I can hear you say

“Don't leave, don't give up on me”

Two weeks you ran away

I remember, “Don't lie to me …”

You couldn't see that it was not that way

I swear I never gave up on you.

2

( )

Seventh Year

(Present Time)

Harry sat alone underneath the willow tree out at the edge of the lake,
staring blankly at the glistening water as the sun began to set. He
remembered nearly a year ago being under this same tree, having a
picnic, and lounging with the love of his life. It was a day he would never
forget, he thought ideally, while fingering the platinum band on his left
ring finger. It was possibly the happiest day of his life to date.

( )

June 13, Sixth Year

(Flashback)

―Why must you read that Muggle nonsense?” the young man currently

using his lap as a pillow asked as he poked the cover of Harry‟s book with

a long pale finger.

Harry chuckled and moved the book aside to look down at the beautiful

face it had been blocking from his view – that in and of itself was a sin
above all others.

―Because it‟s interesting to see how close they get to the truth,” Harry

answered with a fond smile at the blond‟s lovely pout.

―You‟ve been reading for the past fifteen minutes now. Why don‟t you put

it away for a while?” Draco asked nonchalantly, while staring at the
button on Harry‟s white shirt that his fingers were idly playing with. Harry

saw through the indifferent display immediately and his smile only grew

as he marked his page and set his book aside.

Draco obviously wanted his attention, but the Slytherin Prince didn‟t want

to seem weak by admitting it. Although, they had already been together
for over a year now, Draco was still insecure when it came to asking Harry
for anything that would make him seem weak to others. Unfortunately one

of the things that Draco perceived as a weakness was admitting to Harry
exactly how much Draco truly needed him.

Their eyes locked and Draco stopped playing with Harry‟s button as he
grabbed a handful of the shirt and Harry bent down to kiss him. It was

kind of uncomfortable bending down this way, also Draco‟s head was at

an odd angle, but somehow they made it work. After a few moments of
gentle kisses however, Draco seemed to get impatient and tugged on

3

Harry‟s shirt more forcefully.

Harry chuckled, getting the hint, and slid himself out from under Draco‟s
head, before crawling on top of the gorgeous blond and straddling his

waist. He didn‟t waste any time leaning forward and reattaching their
lips. Draco sat up and met him halfway, using one hand to brace himself

on the ground as the other went to the back of Harry‟s neck, pulling him in

deeper.

Harry groaned as Draco did that little trick with his tongue that caused

him to melt completely into the blond every time. He felt Draco‟s satisfied

smirk in the kiss and briefly the words, „smug bastard‟ flashed through
his mind, but then he was being flipped over onto his back and Draco was
looming above him with that look he got in his eyes, like molten silver – it
could set Harry‟s body on fire instantly every time.

―Draco,” Harry sighed arms going around to clutch the back of Draco‟s

shirt tightly as the blond latched onto his neck, immediately hitting all the
right places to send Harry‟s mind and body into overdrive. “Mmm,” he

moaned again and arched as Draco‟s hands joined in on the exploration,
which now included his chest and stomach as his shirt was pushed up.

Harry had always been rather vocal in his approval of the things Draco

did to him, which Draco never seemed to mind. In fact, Draco had admitted
to loving the sounds Harry made. He found it fascinating that Harry could

be so expressive – could allow himself to show such abandon so easily.
What the blond didn‟t know though was that even though Draco didn‟t

make much noise, his eyes clearly displayed every emotion he was feeling

louder than any sound Harry could make.

―Draco, out – outside,” Harry reminded with hitched breaths as Draco

began unbuttoning his pants and slowly pulling down the zipper. Not that
Harry was protesting. In fact, his thighs were only spreading wider to give

the blond more access as Draco began trailing kisses down his stomach.

Draco chuckled huskily, the sound dark and sensual, promising pleasure,
and Harry felt his mind blurring. “Everyone else is still in classes love, and
the willow branches block the view from the windows,” Draco reassured

before bending down and circling his tongue around Harry‟s navel.

They had both skipped their classes before lunch. Harry Herbology and

Draco Arithmancy, in order to have a few blissful moments with each other
before they had to rejoin the real world. This willow had been their

meeting place ever since their relationship had started at the end of their

fifth year. It was like their own private Eden, curtaining them off from the
outside world.

4

―God…” Harry hissed as Draco pulled his throbbing erection from his

pants and stroked him a few times with his beautifully talented hands.

―Hmmm…” Draco hummed in agreement, and Harry would have told him

what a cocky prick he thought Draco was if the blond hadn‟t swooped in
and swallowed him at that moment, causing Harry to cry out in surprise

and pleasure instead.

Harry arched his back and then his hips, unable to control himself, but
Draco only used that as an opportunity to pull his pants and boxers down

further. As Draco‟s mouth did wicked things to him, his hands pushed
Harry‟s shirt up once again to tweak his nipples and massage his

stomach. Harry moaned and writhed uncontrollably, but he couldn‟t help
it. Draco drove him crazy with want and need every time they were
together.

Harry‟s hands found their way into Draco‟s white-blond hair and he
gripped it harshly, knowing Draco loved it, despite complaining later about

it being a mess. Draco‟s mouth stilled its sinful movements on Harry‟s

pulsing erection, and Harry held his head in place as he began fucking
Draco‟s mouth.

―Dray – I‟m going too…” Harry trailed off breathlessly, knowing he wasn‟t
going to last much longer.

―Hmmm…” Draco hummed, sending vibrations up and down Harry‟s

sensitive cock. Harry arched in pleasure and cried out as his orgasm hit.
Draco instantly began moving on his own again, licking, sucking, and

swallowing everything Harry had to offer him.

When Harry finally fell back, panting, Draco released him and laid gentle

kisses all over his lower stomach and thighs. Then once Harry had caught

his breath again, he grabbed Draco by the hair and gently tugged him up.
Draco covered Harry with his body again as they met in a deep, intense

kiss – everything was always so intense when it came to them.

Harry could feel Draco‟s unattended hardness pressing against his thigh,
and felt his own interest peaking once again. He moaned into the kiss,

sliding his hands down Draco‟s hard chest between them to unbutton
Draco‟s pants. The groan Draco gave him as he released the blond‟s

throbbing erection from its confines, went straight to Harry‟s groin, and it

wasn‟t long before Harry was whimpering wantonly into the blond‟s
mouth.

―Draco,” Harry panted taking Draco‟s rather impressive length into his
hand, “I want you to fuck me – right here – right now.” Draco had his eyes

closed tightly, biting his lower lip, and clutching the picnic blanket by

5

Harry‟s head with white knuckles, as Harry continued to stroke him with

smooth firm strokes. “I want you inside me… so deep I can feel your heart
beating.”

―Fuck Harry,” Draco hissed, already feeling himself pulsing in Harry‟s
hand. He immediately whispered a spell that would stretch and lubricate

Harry. Normally, Draco enjoyed doing that part manually, but there was

no time for that right now. He was already too far gone.

Draco entered Harry in one swift motion, immediately setting a fast hard

pace. Harry wrapped his legs around Draco‟s waist, making noises that
could have Draco orgasming just from the sounds leaving those sinful lips.

Draco didn‟t lose control, ever. He was Slytherin‟s Ice Prince, he was a

pureblood, he was a Malfoy, and not just any Malfoy – Lord Malfoy. But
what Harry did to him, the things Harry made him feel – he‟d never stood

a chance when it came to the writhing brunet beneath him.

With Harry, he was just Dray, and that was the only name that meant
anything to him anymore. Draco wanted this passion, this burning –

wanted this love more than anything in the world. Draco wanted Harry
forever if he would allow it.

Harry felt Draco grab his hands and pin them to the ground by his head,

lacing their fingers together, as the blond picked up his pace, snapping his
hips forward, and pushing into Harry so deeply that he could have sworn

they were finally becoming one. They were already one mind, one soul,
one heart – one body was simply the last step.

―Draco! God I love you – I love you,” Harry repeated, the only coherent

thing his muddled mind was able to process as he kissed Draco‟s sweaty
neck, collarbone, and clenched jaw over and over again. He was so close,

and he could tell that Draco was as well. Harry held back though, waiting
for it – there it was.

Draco‟s eyes flashed open and connected with Harry‟s own, and Harry‟s

entire body went into overload as that intense, burning gaze locked onto
him. His second orgasm ripped through him, and all he could do was hold

onto Draco, as their hands remained locked tightly. Harry arched into the

body above him as his walls closed in on Draco and he felt the blond pulse
and then explode inside of him. Draco‟s lips crashed against Harry‟s and

they kissed deeply, riding out both of their pleasure until the very end.

―I love you too,” Draco whispered against Harry‟s lips as he landed a few

softer kisses before pulling away to lie beside Harry. Harry turned onto his

side, facing Draco as the blond wrapped both arms around his waist
pulling him in closer.

6

―How much more time do we have?” Harry murmured closing his eyes for

a moment sleepily.

Draco reached for his crumbled pants and pulled out his wand. “About

twenty minutes,” he answered and then waved his wand again to clean
them up before dropping it and pulling Harry close once again.

Harry sighed and snuggled closer, resting his forehead against Draco‟s.

He wished that they didn‟t have to hide, but Draco wanted to wait a little
while longer. At least until all the hype of him becoming Lord Malfoy and

the defeat of Voldemort died down. Harry was looking forward to this
summer though for the first time in his life. He would be spending it at

Malfoy Manor with Draco. He‟d gone through the Floo to Grimmauld Place
the other day in order to change the wards so that they could connect the
Floo Network to Malfoy Manor.

Not even the Headmaster knew of their relationship though, so he‟d gone

under the pretense of looking over the renovations that he‟d put Dobby in
charge of. In fact, the only person who knew about their relationship was

Severus, who surprisingly hadn‟t said a word against it. He‟d even invited
Draco and Harry to have tea with him one day, most likely to observe their

relationship first hand.

It had been difficult to hide it from the former spy, who also happened to
be Draco‟s godfather. He‟d noticed instantly the change in his godson‟s

behavior, from arrogant, spoiled bastard, to calm, mature adult – that, and
the fact that Draco had started sneaking out quite a lot – there wasn‟t

anything that went on in the dungeons that Severus didn‟t know about.

Harry sighed once again and lifted his hand to run his fingers through
Draco‟s hair. He loved that he was the only one who could get away with

messing it up. Draco would have Avada‟d anyone else who had dared to

touch it. Harry paused however as he felt something odd catch around one
of his fingers, and frowned in confusion. His eyes opened only to see

Draco staring at his face intently as Harry slowly pulled his hand out of
the blond hair.

―Draco!” Harry gasped, suddenly choked up at the sight of the platinum

band sitting innocently around his left ring finger.

It had a few well-placed diamonds around the band, but nothing too

gaudy, and directly in the center was the Malfoy family crest. It was
simple, elegant, and beautiful – the perfect fit for someone like Harry.

Draco must have slipped it on sometime during their previous activities

when Harry had been too distracted to notice.

An elegant hand reached out to grab his own and Harry‟s wide, shocked

7

eyes lifted from the ring to meet Draco‟s guarded and nervous face.

―I know we aren‟t exactly „out‟ yet, but it‟s charmed so that only those who
know about it can see it. Severus knows of course. He‟s the one who

helped me get it from Gringotts. It‟s a family heirloom – my great
grandfather‟s ring. He was one of the few good Malfoys, so I thought you

might like it. I know we haven‟t discussed this yet – I mean we‟re only

sixteen right, and we haven‟t even finished school yet, but I‟d like for you
to have it. You don‟t have to wear it of course – you haven‟t even agreed

to…”

Draco cut his rambling off there, eyes widening as if he‟d just realized

something. “Shit! I forgot to ask!” he hissed to himself before focusing back
on Harry, who was still in too much shock to get his voice working.

―Umm – so will you? – Marry me that is?” Draco asked nervously, and all

at once what was happening hit Harry and he jumped the shocked blond
with a choked laugh of joy.

―Yes! God yes!” Harry answered, feeling Draco sigh in relief as he pulled

back and kissed the blond deeply.

―I was going to wait until graduation to ask you, but Malfoys aren‟t exactly

known for their patience. When we see something we want we go for it,”
Draco said as Harry pulled back and stared at the ring in wonder. He

looked back up at Draco and kissed him lovingly once again, tears of

happiness building in his eyes.

―I‟m glad you went for it,” Harry whispered, softly nuzzling his face in

Draco‟s neck as a few of the tears began to fall.

Draco wrapped his arms around Harry and held him tightly as Harry did

the same, both young men feeling truly complete for the first time in their

lives.

( )

Seventh Year

(Present Time)

They had spent one blissful summer together after that, not leaving each
other’s sight for even a second, and by the end of it, they couldn’t have
imagined going back to being apart. So on September the first they had
walked hand in hand onto Platform Nine and Three-Quarters ready to
face their seventh and last year at Hogwarts together.

( )

8

September 1, Seventh Year

(Flashback)

―Are you sure about this?” Draco questioned squeezing Harry‟s hand

tightly. He understood that Harry was risking a lot more than he was if
this went badly. Draco could care less what anyone thought of him. The

only two opinions that mattered to him at all were Severus‟ and Harry‟s.

Harry still had his friends however, although they weren‟t as close as they
used to be. Weasley was a jealous prick, and for those who thought Draco

was an arrogant, snobbish bastard, they had never spent more than two
minutes in the presence of know-it-all Granger.

The trio had started growing apart during fourth year. After Weasley‟s

betrayal, things had never been the same between them. Then to Draco‟s
disgust, Weasley and Granger had started dating in fifth year around the

same time he and Harry had. It had at least made it easier for Harry to

sneak away unnoticed, but the thought of Weasley and Granger
procreating made Draco cringe.

Draco wasn‟t worried about the Slytherins‟ reactions. They knew when to
keep their mouths shut, but he was worried about how the Gryffindors

would react. He didn‟t want to see Harry hurt by them, which he knew

was going to be unavoidable once they found out that the leader of their
lion pride was engaged to the king of the snakes. It would be the ultimate

betrayal in their narrow-minded eyes.

Harry grabbed Draco by the waist and pulled him around, until Draco was

pressing him up against the brick wall outside of Kings Cross Station, their

trunks forgotten as Draco captured Harry‟s lips in a deep kiss. He pressed
against Harry even more, practically lifting the brunet off his feet. Had

they been in private, Harry would have wrapped his legs around Draco‟s

waist as the kiss deepened into something so strong that it left them both
breathless.

―No I‟m not sure about this,” Harry whispered against his lips, causing
Draco‟s chest to tighten in pain and worry, “but what I am sure about is
that I love you more than anything else in this world, and that I would

gladly give up everything to be with you.”

―You might have to,” Draco replied stroking Harry‟s face sadly with the

back of his hand. He didn‟t want Harry to have to give up anything for
him, which went against a Slytherins naturally selfish nature. But Draco

was selfish in the fact that he wanted Harry to have everything he‟d ever

dreamed of. He wanted Harry‟s life to be perfect, and Draco would go
through hell and back to make Harry happy.

9

―Then it‟s a sacrifice I‟m willing to make,” Harry whispered pressing their

foreheads together. “I would do anything for you –you know that, right?”

Draco kissed Harry‟s nose lightly, before wrapping Harry in his arms and

holding him tightly. “That scares me sometimes,” the normally unflappable
Slytherin admitted.

―It‟s the truth,” Harry whispered, voice shaking a bit. “I don‟t know what I

would have done these last few years without you. With everything that‟s
happened – I don‟t think I would have made it. In fact, I know I wouldn‟t

have made it.”

―Yes you would have,” Draco cut in, soft but firm. He didn‟t like when
Harry started talking like this. It had taken Draco months to build Harry
up, to bring his love out of his dark depression, and it was moments like

these that reminded Draco that Harry was still, and would probably

always be, a work-in-progress. But Draco loved him none-the-less, flaws
and all. “You would have survived. You would have kept going, because

that‟s what you do, and not because you‟re the boy who lived, but because

you‟re Harry – just Harry. You‟re strong, you‟re fearless, and you never
give up –you would have found your own way out.”

Harry rested his head on Draco‟s shoulder as Draco‟s hand came up to
cup the back of his neck. “You‟ve saved me so many times Draco, some

you aren‟t even aware of,” he whispered, causing Draco to swallow thickly

and hold him tighter. “I may have been able to survive, but I wouldn‟t have
lived. I would never have been whole. I would never have been happy.”

―I love you Harry… so much,” Draco sighed, kissing Harry‟s neck right
below his ear, and if possible holding him tighter.

A train horn blew from nearby reminding them that they were in a public

place, a Muggle place no less, and reluctantly, Draco pulled away. Harry
caught his hand however, and gave it a squeeze as he looked up at Draco

smiling, and completely trusting that Draco would stay with him through

whatever happened, and simultaneously promising Draco to stick by him.

―Ready?” Harry asked, turning Draco‟s question back on him.

―Always,” Draco replied, and hand in hand, they walked through the
barrier together.

( )

Hogwarts, Seventh Year

(Present Time)

10

To say everyone had been shocked would have been a serious
understatement. Draco had stood firmly between Harry and the other
Gryffindors, as they’d hurled accusations and insults, or even worse,
remained silent. In the end, Draco had simply grabbed Harry’s hand and
pulled him from the tower. It wasn’t like they hadn’t expected it after all.
In fact, all of Harry’s things had already been sent to Draco’s rooms.
Being head boy had its perks. It meant Draco got his own apartment,
almost like the teachers’ quarters, although not nearly as large.

It was enough for the two of them though, and Harry found that he
wasn’t nearly as depressed as he thought he’d be considering he’d just
lost his two best friends and his housemates. They had been growing
apart for some time though, and getting to be with Draco had been worth
it. At least Draco still had some of his friends. Blaise still spoke to him,
although he pretty much ignored Harry’s existence. The same went for
Pansy, who Harry was continuously glaring at for her blatant flirtation.
Of course, Draco never took any notice of it.

Harry hadn’t minded though, as long as he had Draco there was nothing
else in the world that mattered. So what if he had no family, and now, no
friends. He was going to have a lifetime with the love of his life. Draco
would be his family, and Draco was already his best friend.

Unfortunately, for Harry, things never worked out the way he hoped they
would and in the end he’d lost Draco too.

( )

November 1, Seventh Year

(Flashback)

Draco and Harry were walking around the lake hand in hand, enjoying the

freshly fallen snow. It had been two months since they‟d come out to

everyone and things finally seemed to be settling down. At least, in their
own little bubble it had. They‟d started ignoring the papers, ignoring their

peers, and even ignoring the teachers who hadn‟t thought it was a good

idea for Harry to get mixed up with someone like Draco. They had started
ignoring everything but each other and the future they were planning

together.

―After we‟re married I think we should travel for a while – just, get away

from everything,” Draco said as Harry burrowed in closer to his side for

warmth.

―That sounds nice,” Harry replied. “I was reading about that play you

wanted to see. The paper said that it would be opening in France in July
after it‟s finished touring in America.”

11

Draco looked down at Harry in surprise. “But you hate the theater.”

―I don‟t hate it,” Harry stated with a roll of his eyes. “I just get emotional
and I don‟t like crying. I‟ve cried at every one of them we‟ve seen so far,

but this one looks different, and besides, I‟ve already bought the tickets,”
he finished, continuing to walk forward with a smirk as Draco paused in

shock.

Draco caught up with him a few seconds later and spun him around. “But
I‟ve been trying! Those tickets are impossible to get!” he exclaimed, staring

at Harry with wide eyes.

Harry tapped Draco on the nose with the two tickets he‟d pulled from his
pocket and a playful twinkle in his eyes. “And I‟m Harry Potter, nothing is

impossible when it comes to me.”

Draco took the tickets and stared at them for a moment in awe. Harry

wondered what Draco‟s friends would think of their Slytherin Prince if they

could see him now.

―You used your fame to get me tickets?” the dazed blond questioned,

looking up at Harry with a sappy grin. He knew how much Harry hated
being famous and using his fame.

Harry shrugged nonchalantly. “You know I‟d do anything for you,” he

answered looking across the lake, a bit embarrassed to admit that he‟d
had to throw his name around a few times and sign a few autographs.

Then Draco‟s arms were around him, and it was all worth it.

―What did I ever do to deserve someone as wonderful as you?” the blond

murmured, kissing his ear.

―I have no idea,” Harry replied playfully, giggling and pulling away when
Draco began tickling his sides in retaliation. He didn‟t get far though before

he was caught by the wrist and pulled back against a firm chest. Draco‟s
other arm snaked around his waist and with a wicked smirk, the blond

captured his lips in a toe-curling kiss.

―What about now – have an idea?” the blond asked, smirking in
satisfaction at Harry‟s dazed appearance.

―I think… it may be… coming to me…” Harry panted breathlessly.

Draco chuckled deeply, nuzzling Harry‟s cheek as the raven-haired teen

caught his breath. He trailed his lips up to Harry‟s ear and nipped the lobe
sharply, causing Harry to gasp and melt further against him.

12

―I guess I‟ll just have to be more forceful in my persuading then,” Draco

hissed, pressing against Harry firmly and trailing a few hot kisses down
the long column of his neck.

―Hmmm… it may take a lot of long hard hours to come to me,” Harry
agreed, growing hot despite the cold weather surrounding them.

―I should start right away then,” the blond murmured, leaving a lovely red
mark right under Harry‟s ear where everyone could see it.

―The sooner the better,” Harry agreed, letting his head fall to the side, eyes

closed in delirious pleasure as Draco continued to work his neck.

Harry gasped in surprise however as Draco‟s palm pressed firmly against

his hardening erection through his trousers. When had the blond even
opened his robes?

―Not too soon though,” the Slytherin smirked devilishly. “What do you say

we take this to our rooms and I show you over and over and over… and
over again, why it is you keep me around.”

Harry moaned, breathing deeply as Draco emphasized his point with firm
strokes of his hand. Harry grabbed Draco behind the neck and brought the

blond in for another hot kiss. They pulled apart panting and one look at

the other had them grabbing each other‟s hand and rushing back towards
the castle. They were just coming to the middle of the staircase, Harry

giggling and jumping as Draco pinched his bum, when there was a sudden
flash of light.

―Harry!” Draco shouted in panic, pushing Harry forward.

Harry hit the stairs with a startled cry of pain as he felt his wrist snap,
and then the shocked screams started. He was on his feet instantly, wrist

cradled to his chest, and wand held awkwardly in his left hand. But it
was all forgotten as his eyes landed on the crumpled figure at the bottom

of the staircase.

In a panicked daze Harry stumbled down, nearly losing his footing a few
times, and fell to his knees beside the still form of his love. Draco‟s chest

was rising and falling, but his face was ghostly pale, eyes closed, left leg

twisted at an awkward angle, and there was a steadily growing pool of
blood forming around his head, staining his beautiful blond hair.

Harry didn‟t know how long he sat there clutching the blond‟s robes and
sobbing in shock, but suddenly hands were on him, prying, pulling, and

fighting him away from Draco. Then they were carrying Draco away and

Harry broke free of the hands that were holding him and ran after them,

13

down the corridors to the hospital wing, but before he could enter, they

slammed the doors in his face. At that moment, Harry knew everything
was about to change.

( )

Hogwarts, Seventh Year

(Present Time)

Amnesia: it was a word that would most likely haunt Harry for the rest of
his life. To this day, it still hadn’t really sunk in, but he remember clearly
the day he’d heard the word being used in regards to his own life for the
first time.

( )

November 1, Seventh Year

(Flashback)

―So - so you‟re saying that - he doesn‟t - doesn‟t remember anything?”

Harry questioned fighting back the impending breakdown welling inside of
him, threatening to suffocate him.

The Headmaster shook his head with a sigh. “He doesn‟t remember
anything. We are guessing that because he was focused on saving you

that you and his feelings for you were at the forefront of his mind when he

impacted his head. He doesn‟t remember your relationship or his feelings
for you.”

Harry choked back a sob unable to wrap his mind around what was
happening. “But - but there‟s got to be a - a potion or - or something!

Severus can use Legilimency. I‟ll - I‟ll call St. Mungo‟s for a mind healer,”

Harry said desperately, unwilling to accept this.

Dumbledore merely shook his head again. “I‟m sorry Harry, but there is

nothing we can do to cure something like this--”

―But I can talk to him! I can make him remember! I need to go see him,”
Harry said about to stand to his feet.

―No Harry, you can‟t see him; it would only make it worse for Draco to
adjust,” Dumbledore replied holding out a hand to stop Harry from getting

up. “And honestly, I think this is for the best--”

―What? No! NO!” Harry snapped standing to his feet. “You can‟t - you can‟t

say that!”

14

―Harry…” Dumbledore sighed in exasperation as if speaking to a two year

old. “I‟ve talked to you about this before, but honestly you can‟t have
thought that this farce of a relationship would last. You have the public to

think about, dear boy. They look up to you. They look at you to guide them.
You are a symbol of light and hope, and as much as I hate to say it, Draco

Malfoy comes from a long line of dark wizards. This relationship between

the two of you was no good from the beginning and--”

Everything in Dumbledore‟s office suddenly exploded and the old

Headmaster had to quickly throw up a shield to protect himself. Harry
stood in the middle of it all shaking with rage and vibrating with power.

His glare was so harsh, eyes so cold, that it was no wonder he had been

able to defeat the darkest lord of all time, and Dumbledore had to admit
that he was shaken.

―Don‟t. You. Fucking. Dare,” Harry bit out through clenched teeth. “This is
my life. My decision! I‟ve earned the right to do whatever the hell I want!

The rest of the world can go fuck themselves for all I care! Don‟t come near

me. Don‟t speak to me ever again. From this point on you are nothing more
to me than the Headmaster of this fucking school,” Harry snapped and

with those final words he turned and left Dumbledore‟s office for the last

time.

( )

Hogwarts, Seventh Year

(Present Time)

Harry remembered going to the infirmary, but Draco had been moved
and Madam Pomfrey had refused to tell him where they had moved
Draco. He’d then gone to Severus, but the Potions Master had refused to
give him any information either, and Harry could see it in Severus’s eyes
that the Headmaster had most likely threatened him with his job if he
had – and who would want to hire a former Death Eater spy. The only
consolation Harry had gotten was Severus’s promise to speak to Draco
and explain things to him.

That night Harry had laid in their bed sobbing and praying with
everything he had that something, anything, would jog Draco’s memory.
The next morning he remembered waking up eyes swollen shut and
unable to move from the bed because of the pain, not only in his heart,
but consuming his whole being. For two weeks after that, Harry hadn’t
moved an inch begging Draco to come to him. Even when the house-elves
had come to get Draco’s stuff and move it out, Harry had sobbed the
entire time pleading with them not to take anything.

Dobby had popped in and out to check on Harry at least twice a day,

15

force feeding him and changing his pajamas and sheets regularly. By the
end of the first week, Harry had finally worked up the courage to ask the
elf about Draco and Dobby’s answer had sent him spiraling down into a
depression worse than he had been in the week before, because with the
little elf’s answer it became a reality.

Harry wasn’t able to lie there and pretend anymore that Draco would
walk through the door any second. Draco had really forgotten him. He’d
moved back into the Slytherin dorms and Dobby said that he’d seemed
happy to be back with his friends.

By the end of the second week, Harry had woken up from crying himself
to sleep yet again with a new determination. So taking a shower and
gathering himself together as best he could he’d made his way to the
library among the stares and whispers of the school.

Harry had then written letter after letter to anyone he could find that
specialized in head injuries or amnesia. He’d read book after book,
researching until exhaustion took over and he fell asleep right there in
the uncomfortable library chair, only to wake up hours later and do it all
over again.

Everything Harry found and every reply came back the same though…
Draco would have to remember it on his own if he ever remembered at
all. There was just no way to bring back something that wasn’t there
anymore, and even showing the memories in a Pensieve wouldn’t return
the emotions behind them.

( )

November 21, Seventh Year

(Flashback)

Harry took a deep breath and smoothed his robes nervously, not that it

helped… he knew he looked like shit. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy
from weeks of constant crying, coupled with dark circles and bags from

lack of sleep. He was paler than a ghost and thinner and weaker than
he‟d ever been in his entire life, but it had been hard to eat anything much
less keep it down. Harry felt completely vulnerable and he knew that this

was a bad idea, but he had to at least try. So taking a deep breath he
pushed open the Great Hall doors and walked inside.

All talking seemed to fade out as he paused and glanced around

nervously. He forced himself to look over at Draco only to see the blond
looking down at his food, and Harry breathed a small sigh of relief. At

least Draco wasn‟t glaring at him. Cautiously, Harry made his way over to
the Slytherin table unsure of how to approach this. How did you approach

16

the person you were in love with and supposed to spend the rest of your

life with when they didn‟t love you or even remember that they ever had?

―Potter, what the hell do you think you are doing?” Theodore Nott spoke up

as Harry stopped in front of their group.

―I wanted to speak to Draco,” Harry tried, but immediately he was shot

down.

―Well he doesn‟t want to speak to you Potter, so just go away!” Pansy
Parkinson snapped leaning her large breasts against Draco, causing

Harry‟s stomach to lurch violently when Draco didn‟t immediately push
her away in disgust.

―I - I just wanted to talk to him,” Harry spoke softly, trying to keep his
voice under control as it was suddenly getting harder to breathe.

―Potter! Are you that dimwitted? You heard them I don‟t want to speak to

you!” Draco suddenly snapped finally looking up at him and Harry felt his
breath hitch at the anger in Draco‟s voice and eyes. Draco hadn‟t spoken

to him in that tone since they‟d gotten together, and the glare that he was
sending him pierced through Harry‟s chest like a hot iron rod.

―But Draco, I -”

―Don‟t call me that! I‟m Malfoy to you, not Draco! You have no right to use
my name! Got it?” Draco suddenly shouted standing to his feet, anger and

frustration lacing every word, and Harry could see in his silver eyes that
he was extremely frustrated and confused at the moment. That didn‟t

mean that his tone and words didn‟t hurt any less though.

―Please can we just talk?” Harry pleaded desperately trying to reach out
and touch him, but Draco jerked away as if Harry were the plague.

―About what? Our relationship!” Draco sneered as if the word was some
kind of disease on his lips. “That‟s right, everyone‟s already told me

everything about it. I don‟t know how you managed to seduce me,” Draco
derided eyeing Harry‟s broken form in clear disgust, “or what potion or
spell you used to get me to actually agree to marry you„re worthless hide,

but whatever it was it ends now! I don‟t want anything to do with you!
Merlin, what an embarrassment!”

Harry felt his already broken heart shattering. This had been exactly the
reaction he had been dreading for weeks now – the reaction that finally

shattered what little hope Harry had foolishly held on to. He should have

known that nothing good in his life would ever last and the saddest part
was that before all of this Draco had just finished convincing him that

17

perhaps it would.

―Plea-please Draco – please, I - I love…I love you,” Harry whimpered losing
any composure or dignity he‟d managed to regain as tears began to fall,

his breath began to hitch, and his body began to shudder with the
intensity of his pain.

Draco reeled back as if he‟d been slapped. “Go - Go away, Potter! You‟re

pathetic and a liar! Get out of my sight! Go away!” he shouted, and Harry
could do nothing but turn and flee.

( )

Hogwarts, Seventh Year

(Present Time)

The pain of that rejection – God, it had torn him apart, and he
remembered the week following the confrontation clearly. Harry had
stumbled back to his room delirious and sick, and he’d remained curled
up in a sobbing, broken, pathetic heap the entire week after. It was what
he had dreaded more than anything, hearing Draco speak to him like
that again, seeing the hate in those eyes he loved so much that just
weeks before had looked upon him with pure, unadulterated love as well.

To this day Harry still hadn’t gotten over it, and he had come to accept
that he probably never would. Mainly because he didn’t want to. Harry
didn’t want to give up the small hope that Draco could possibly one day
remember him. That one day Draco would come banging down his door,
sweep him into his arms, and kiss all the pain away. Harry would wait
the rest of his life for Draco to remember him, because Harry hadn’t
forgotten Dray.

Harry had spent that entire week laying there, wasting away, and
wondering what he would do now that he didn’t have Draco, but then not
caring if he ever did anything again. In that moment, Harry truly
understood what it felt like to want to die – to just end it all. He had
thought after the war, the way he had felt then – the depression that had
consumed him, he couldn’t have possibly sunk any lower, but this… this
pain, it made everything else feel like nothing more than a mere paper
cut.

Then at the end of that week Severus had suddenly appeared like a bat
out of Hell – or more like the dungeons – and demanded that Harry come
to class or he would drop him. Harry guessed that in his own
encouraging way Severus was trying to get him going again. The Potions
Master had been the only one to come and check on him – not surprising
really. The Gryffindors felt as if Harry had abandoned them for the

18

Slytherins so in turn they had abandoned Harry.

( )

November 29, Seventh Year

(Flashback)

With the Potions Master‟s snipping comments as motivation Harry forced

himself to his feet, ate the lunch Severus provided, showered, and followed

obediently as the man led him down to the dungeons. After all, what
would Draco say if Harry failed all of his classes? Harry felt like he

couldn‟t function on his own though, but following orders – he‟d always

been good at that. Draco had worked so hard to break him of that habit
too, but Draco wasn‟t here anymore so Harry had no one to tell him that

his opinions mattered, that he was more than just a good little solider.

During Potions class, Harry sat all the way at the front of the room so that

he wouldn‟t accidentally glance at even the back of Draco‟s head. In fact,

he closed his eyes as the classroom was filling with students, and stared
at the floor as he went to get his ingredients from the storage room. He

bumped into someone though and they snarled before ramming into his
shoulder and pushing him to the floor.

―Watch where you‟re going, Potter!” Harry‟s former best friend snapped,

and Harry actually let out a sigh of relief that it had only been Ron.

Harry picked himself back up, noticing that the room was eerily silent, but

he didn‟t dare look around in case his eyes met Draco‟s. Instead, Harry
ducked his head and disappeared into the storage room. It didn‟t stop the

voices from carrying though, and one voice in particular made Harry‟s

breath hitch.

―What the fuck was that all about?” Draco asked in obvious confusion.

Harry guessed that no one had explained the falling out between him and
the other Gryffindors because of their relationship.

What exactly had they told him? Severus said that he had tried to speak to
Draco about it, but that Draco hadn‟t wanted to hear it, and now it seemed
that Draco was avoiding his godfather all together. Harry felt bad for

putting a strain on their relationship. He should really speak to Severus

and tell him that it wasn‟t worth it that two relationships didn‟t need to be
ruined because of this.

Harry hadn‟t realized how long he‟d been standing in the storage
cupboard until the door opened and the Potions Master himself walked in.

“Did he hurt you, Potter?” the Professor asked with the barest hint of

concern in his eyes.

19

Harry shook his head. “Umm, no Professor, I was just gathering my

ingredients,” he answered holding up the vials to show him.

―Yes Potter, I guess for one of your mental capacity it would take nearly

half an hour to read the labels, but if you would kindly join the class
now…”

―Of course, Professor,” Harry answered quickly, startled that he had been

in there so long.

When he stepped out of the cupboard there was silence again, but Harry

kept his head down and shuffled over to his desk to get to work silently.
By the time class was over Harry had finished his potion perfectly. Draco
had been tutoring him since they‟d started dating. The blond had taken it

as a personal offence when Harry mentioned how much he hated “the art”
as Draco would put it. Now that he actually knew what he was doing

though Harry found it rather enjoyable, and he and Draco spent some of
their best quality time in a lab working on experiments together.

―Potter, I expect you to bottle the rest of that before you leave. Madame

Pomfrey could use it in the hospital wing,” Severus commented as Harry
was returning to his seat to clean up.

―Yes sir,” Harry replied softly before getting to work, all too aware that
Draco had stayed behind to bottle the rest of his too.

Draco finished before him, but Harry didn‟t look up as the blond walked

past him to Severus‟s desk. “Since when did you trust Potter to make a
potion correctly, Severus?” he asked his godfather with a sneer at Harry

that stabbed straight through his heart.

―Since you began tutoring him,” Severus replied with an obvious frown in

his voice, but Harry still didn‟t look up as he tried to control his trembling

hands so that he could fill the last vial.

There was no answer from the blond, and Harry couldn‟t help but glance

up. It was just in time to see Draco‟s stiff back as he stalked out of the
classroom, slamming the door close behind him.

( )

Hogwarts, Seventh Year

(Present Time)

Since then if Harry didn’t show up for classes and at least one meal
Severus would come to his room and pester him until he got out of bed.
Therefore, ironically the dour Potions Master was the only reason Harry

20

got out of bed most mornings.

( )

December 25, Seventh Year

(Flashback)

―Potter wake up!” Severus commanded while waving his wand to jerk the

comforter off of Harry.

Harry sat up with a sigh, knowing by now that he didn‟t have a choice in
the matter and one way or another Severus would have him out of bed. He

moved sluggishly into the bathroom to get ready, wishing more than
anything that this day would just go away - or rather that he hadn‟t

woken up in the first place. Since they‟d been together he and Draco had

always celebrated Christmas morning together in bed, but that wasn‟t
going to happen this year.

They walked into the great hall and Harry moved toward the Gryffindor

table to find an empty space. There had been more students stay for
Christmas this year, particularly the Slytherins considering a lot of their

parents were in Azkaban or under some sort of Ministry surveillance. Not
everyone was at their own tables though, most were sitting with different

houses, mingling and chatting happily as they showed off their gifts.

Harry simply sat at the end of his house table and put a few things on his
plate to make Severus happy. He ate, or more like picked at his food, with

his head bowed in silence, trying to ignore the happiness around him. It
wasn‟t working too well though and Harry felt as if his already shattered

heart was being stepped on as he glanced up to see Draco sitting at the

Slytherin table trading gifts with Blaise and his other friends.

Harry realized that he was probably the only one in the hall without a gift

to show off, and could feel the stares and whispers going around already.

He didn‟t look up at anyone else though as he knew they were probably
laughing at him - saying that he deserved to be alone after betraying them

and hooking up with a Slytherin and a Death Eaters son.

Deciding that he had nothing left to lose Harry stood to his feet and made

his way over to the Slytherin table. Silence reigned in the hall as people

stopped what they were doing to look. Harry stood before Draco and his
group, holding the green and silver wrapped package in his shaking

hands. He didn‟t look up, even at Draco, as he set the package on the end

of the table across from the blond, sure that Draco wouldn‟t take it if he
handed it to him directly.

―I - I got this for you months ago…” Harry trailed off uncertainly. “You uh,

21

most likely don‟t remember but you - you saw it in a shop and you wanted

it but - but it was one of a kind and the dealer had already sold it to a
private collector. I uh - I got the goblins to do me a favor and track down

the person who‟d bought it and I - I bought it back from them.”

Draco hadn‟t said anything the whole time Harry was speaking and Harry

chanced a glance at the Slytherin to see him frowning heavily at the small

package - probably wondering how much Harry‟d had to pay to buy it
back from a private collector.

―Well Draco certainly didn‟t get anything for you!” Pansy suddenly snarled
maliciously.

―I - I wasn‟t expecting anything in return,” Harry replied looking back

down at the ground again. He wouldn‟t lie and say that he hadn‟t
fantasized Draco waking him up this morning with gifts and kisses, saying

he remember and he was so sorry for ever forgetting, but of course reality
was never so kind.

―Poor little Potter, it doesn‟t look as if anyone cared enough to get you

anything,” Pansy then continued, causing Harry to flinch at the pain in the
truth of that comment.

―I just - just thought that you would still like it,” Harry finished addressing
Draco shakily before turning on his heel and walking away as quickly as

possible without tripping over his own feet.

( )

Hogwarts, Seventh Year

(Present Time)

That had been the worst Christmas of Harry’s life - even the Dursley’s
hadn’t been able to compare. Severus had come and had dinner with him
that night, but it was silent and strained, neither one of them knowing
what to say to the other, and Severus leaving with only a curt nod and
command for Harry to be in class after the new year. Harry didn’t see
Severus after that. Obviously, the Potions Master had understood that
Harry would need time to himself, and he hadn’t come to bug Harry out
of bed or to eat.

Once classes started again though Harry had forced himself up, and
forced himself to go, knowing that if he didn’t Severus would be back
with a vengeance. On some level Harry was grateful to the man, but then
again Harry cursed Severus seven ways to hell for not just letting him
waste away like he wanted to do. One thing that had almost made it
worth it though was seeing Draco in the hallway once checking the time

22

with Salazar Slytherin’s pocket watch - Harry’s Christmas present to
him.

The pain didn’t go away - it never did, but for a few days at least Harry
had found some comfort in knowing Draco hadn’t discarded it
immediately. Of course, once that temporary comfort had worn off the
pain, emptiness, and loneliness had come back with a vengeance as if it
had to make up for the lost time.

Then toward the end of May it had happened - Harry’s saving grace.

( )

May 26, Seventh Year

(Flashback)

Harry walked into the entrance hall to see a large group of students
gathered around the announcement board. There was a rather large,

official looking, scroll there, but Harry couldn‟t see it properly so he waited

until most of the crowd had gone inside the great hall before moving closer
to read it.

To Harry‟s surprise it was from the Auror department asking for the help
of an available graduating student to assist on a mission - a mission

classified Black.

Harry started in shock, wondering how Dumbledore could have allowed
this, but then again the Minister had probably gone over his head in order

to post it here. Everyone knew that a mission classified as Black by the

Aurors meant that there was a very high risk that the person going on said
mission wasn‟t coming back. It was considered a suicide mission.

That was the reason why the Ministry didn‟t assign these missions.
Instead, they asked for volunteers. They must have been really desperate

though if they were posting this in a school, or perhaps they were looking

for a certain kind of person for the mission. Harry knew that the Ministry
would rather not send someone with a family - they would go for an older
person about to retire or die anyway or they would go for someone young

with no real attachments - someone like him Harry realized.

That was probably why they had done this. They wanted him - Harry just

knew it. Kingsley had been writing him for months, pleading with him to
join the Aurors when he graduated, but because of Draco‟s protests Harry

had rejected him every time. This must have been why though. Kingsley

must have had this mission in mind.

After all Harry was the perfect candidate - He was very powerful and had

23

the most chance of surviving it, but also Harry was an orphan with no

family, no real friends to name, a Death Eaters son for a lover who now
had amnesia and didn‟t remember him anyway - no one to care if he made

it back or not.

It seemed as if they only needed one person to volunteer as there was only

one slot for a name and no one had yet filled it. Harry stared at it for a

long moment, but then turned and went into the great hall. He sat at his
usual spot at the end of the Gryffindor table alone and ate in silence.

When Harry did look up though his eyes caught sight of Draco looking at

him, and Harry‟s heart skipped a beat as he sent Draco a smile of hope,
but then Draco simply looked away indifferently and Harry felt himself die

completely this time.

Harry stood, and head bowed, shoulders sagging he left the great hall.

The next day the school was abuzz with the news that the scroll had

disappeared and someone had signed their name.

( )

June 13, Seventh Year

(Present Time)

Harry stood from the willow tree and took one last glance at the lake
before turning and preparing himself. He simply had to get through
graduation and then he was off to the Ministry. Kingsley had written him
in regards to the mission. It was top secret therefore they couldn’t
discuss the details until they met in person, but Harry knew that it had
to do with a group of Dark Wizards somewhere in England.

Kingsley had wanted to make sure Harry knew that he could back out at
any time. The scroll Harry had signed hadn’t been binding, but Harry
knew that unless a miracle somehow happened and Draco got his
memory back then he was going. No one knew for sure that Harry was
the one to sign his name, although it seemed to be the most popular
guess among the student population - and of course Harry knew that
somehow Severus knew.

The man hadn’t tried to stop him though; he’d merely nodded his head in
acceptance of Harry’s decision, saying that it was better to go out fighting
then to waste away as Harry had been doing. Harry agreed, but the truth
was the only reason Harry was going on this mission was because
despite his Gryffindor heritage he was too much of a coward to end it
himself. Besides, he was the Boy Who Lived and this seemed like a more
fitting way to go out.

Graduation was uneventful - at least for Harry. He pretty much ignored

24

everything around him except for when his own name and Draco’s was
called. Harry had no family or friends there waiting proudly to greet him
so he merely grabbed his scroll and walked away, only to stop at the edge
of the crowd as he spotted Kingsley standing there in full Auror gear
waiting to take him away.

There was a hush that fell over the festivities as many others noticed this
as well, and with a grim frown Harry walked over to the Head Auror.
Most must have realized what this was about because the whispers
immediately started up as students explained to their parents what was
going on, although most parents had already realized as well. It would
most likely be in all the papers tomorrow: Harry Potter on a Top Secret
Mission for the Ministry.

―Ready?‖ Kingsley asked as Harry walked up to him.

Harry nodded, but then paused as he remembered something. ―There’s
just one more thing I’ve got to do,‖ he said quickly before turning around
and jogging back over to the crowd. Harry spotted Draco standing next to
Severus, Blaise, and Blaise’s parents. He slowed his pace and
approached them cautiously as Draco was already frowning at him - but
at least the look of loathing and disgust was no longer there and Harry
guessed that he could deal with that.

―Dra - Malfoy,‖ Harry corrected, although it left a bitter taste in his
mouth. ―I wanted to give you this,‖ he continued, reaching into his cloak
pocket and pulling out the envelope. ―You - you don’t remember but I - I
gave them to you before, and I - I just thought that you would still like to
have them. Also there’s -‖ Harry felt his throat choking up and cursed
himself, but he had to do this. It was only right that he give it back, it
had been in Draco’s family for generations and Draco wouldn’t have
wanted him to have it anymore.

―There’s the ring you gave me,‖ Harry continued in a small, painful voice.
It was taking everything in him not to cry. He just wanted so badly for
Draco to remember, for him to take Harry into his arms and tell him not
to go, but Harry knew that it wasn’t going to happen.

―Ring?‖ Draco asked in confusion, speaking to him for the first time in
months without a hint of malice in his voice.

―Yeah, um - you said it was a family heirloom - your great grandfathers,‖
Harry answered still offering the envelope, which Draco now reached out
and took with a heavy frown.

―Why would I give you a ring?‖ Draco then questioned in confusion

25

―It was a year ago today actually, over there by the willow, you - you
asked me to marry you,‖ Harry answered softly, watching Draco sadly as
a lost and confused, but surprised look entered the blond’s beautiful
eyes.

―Married? I really was going to marry you,‖ Draco stated softly, more to
himself than anyone else.

―Um, yeah,‖ Harry answered, uncertain of what to do or say. This was
the first real conversation they’d had and Harry didn’t want to set Draco
off. ―At least you asked, and I was hoping you wouldn’t change your
mind.‖ Harry tried to joke, but really it just came off as sad and pathetic,
and Draco just stared down blankly at the envelope as Harry blinked
rapidly to hold back the tears.

There was suddenly a presence behind him and then Kingsley’s heavy
hand landed on his shoulder. ―We need to hurry, there is a lot to go over
before you leave,‖ the Auror urged, and Harry merely nodded before he
was led away, praying that Draco would tell him to stop - but the prayer
was never answered.

( )

Malfoy Manor, Post Graduation

(Present Time)

Draco stared down at the envelope, flipping it over in his hands. He
didn’t know why he felt so anxious about it, but he’d been doing this
since Potter had handed him the blasted thing to him.

When he’d first woken up in the hospital wing Draco had thought the
whole thing had been some elaborate prank - of course he’d never dated
Potter much less wanted to marry him, but then seeing Potter that first
time in the great hall after he’d gotten out of the hospital wing - Draco
knew that his friends hadn’t just been pulling his leg.

Potter had looked positively heartbroken and miserable. Draco had never
been more startled in his life to see Potter there before him, begging him
to remember, sobbing and shuddering in despair. It had… frightened
him.

Then to see Potters friends shunning him because Potter had apparently
chosen him over them, to even have his own godfather telling him that he
needed to speak to Potter - Draco hadn’t known what to do. He couldn’t
remember anything and the only feelings he’d been able to summon up
toward the Gryffindor was cold indifference and maybe a little bit of pity.

26

Then Potter had come up to him on Christmas with the gift, and Draco
would have lied if he’d said that seeing the silver pocket watch with the
elegantly engraved serpentine S hadn’t sparked something in him -
although, he hadn’t been able to figure out what. It wasn’t enough to
have him running to Potter though.

Now there was this envelope with a gift and apparently what was to be
Potter’s engagement ring from him. It was all surreal for Draco, and he
wasn’t sure if he wanted to open it or not. Opening the envelope would
make it real, make it solid, confirm everything that Draco had been so
vehemently denying for so many months now, and it would intensify the
guilt Draco already felt - because Draco knew.

Draco knew deep down in the place he was afraid to look that it was his
fault. Harry had signed up for that mission because of him - because he
couldn’t live without him. The least Draco could now do was open the
envelope, so steeling himself against the reality of what he would find
Draco slit open the seal.

The first thing that tumbled out was of course the ring, and Draco
released a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding as he picked it up
with trembling fingers to study it. It was definitely his great grandfather’s
ring, and indeed it triggered something strong in Draco’s heart as he
examined it for the first time in years—that he could remember at least.
The second item to fall out of the envelope happened to be what looked
like a letter, and cautiously Draco opened it to read what Potter had
written.

Dear Draco,

I know you probably won‟t want to read this, but please if you‟ve read this

far then don‟t tear the letter up just yet. You won‟t ever have to hear from

me again after this, but I just needed you to know a few things. I know it
probably doesn‟t mean much to you now, but I do love you Dray - still do

and always will, and if you ever do get your memory back then I want you

to at least have this bit of comfort.

I want you to know that I forgive you - that I don‟t blame you for anything

you might have done or said over the last few months that hurt me. I know
you didn‟t mean any of it - or at least my Draco didn‟t. I know this doesn‟t

mean much either coming from me now, but I want you to know that you

can move on. You'll find someone better to love Draco, someone worth
remembering, and I know they‟ll be the luckiest person in the world to

have you.

Despite everything I want you to be happy Draco - more than anything I

want you to be happy. I hope you do everything you ever told me you

27

dreamed of doing. I know you can and I know you will once you set your

mind to something. By the time you read this letter I‟ll probably be gone,
and while a part of me wishes you would remember the part that wants

you to be happy after I‟m gone hopes that you never will now that I‟ve
made this decision.

I just needed you to know though that I love you and I cherish every

moment you gave to me. You made me the happiest I‟d ever been and I
thank you for that. You are my life - the single thing I loved most in this

world. You made me a better person and I was happy that I got to know

you Draco Malfoy.

All My Love,
Harry.

Draco read the letter over twice before setting it aside numbly. He swiped
a trembling hand over his face and through his hair as he took in a deep
breath. This was all too much. It felt as if everything was suddenly
hitting him all at once. Draco couldn’t understand or grasp all the
chaotic feelings driving through him. His head began to ache and he
cradled it in his hands for a moment.

Between his fingers Draco happened to catch sight of the envelope sitting
innocently on his knee and the two slips of paper sticking out. From
what he could see of them they looked like tickets of some sort. The piece
of the title he could read was in French, and Draco felt something spark
in the back of his mind.

Peace… contentment…

―After we‟re married I think we should travel for a while – just, get away
from everything,” Draco said as Harry burrowed in closer to his side for

warmth.

―That sounds nice,” Harry replied. “I was reading about that play you
wanted to see. The paper said that it would be opening in France in July

after its finished touring in America.”

Wonder… excitement… happiness - so much happiness.

Draco caught up with him a few seconds later and spun him around. “But

I‟ve been trying! Those tickets are impossible to get!” he exclaimed, staring
at Harry with wide eyes.

Harry tapped Draco on the nose with the two tickets he‟d pulled from his
pocket with a playful twinkle in his eyes. “And I‟m Harry Potter, nothing is

impossible when it comes to me.”

28

Love… so much fucking love - so much love he thought he’d be
overwhelmed with it.

―You used your fame to get me tickets?” the dazed blond questioned,

looking up at Harry with a sappy grin. He knew how much Harry hated
being famous and using his fame.

Harry shrugged nonchalantly. “You know I‟d do anything for you.”

Draco fell out of his chair and to the floor with his head cradled in his
hands, eye clenched tightly against the sudden explosion of pain and
memories. He was barely able to call for his house elf before he blacked
out and knew no more.

( )

Draco woke with a violent start, and before the blond even opened his
mouth and said anything Severus knew that he remembered. The wild,
desperate look in Draco’s eyes told him that his godson remembered not
only his past with Harry, but everything else that had happened up until
this point.

―Harry,‖ Draco breathed sitting up so quickly that it made Severus light
headed.

―Draco stay calm,‖ Severus soothed placing a restraining hand on his
godsons shoulder.

―Harry - where… oh god Sev, Harry! I’ve got to go… Let me go!‖ Draco
shouted trying to get up from the bed Severus had laid him on after
Draco’s personal house elf had popped into his potions lab. Severus
didn’t let Draco get up, not until he checked him over completely to make
sure there were no ill side affects to Draco regaining his previous
memories.

―Draco - Draco wait, let me check you over - tell me what you remember,‖
Severus stated trying to get Draco to focus on something besides the
panic.

―I - I remember everything - I - oh god…‖ Draco trailed off gripping his
hair tightly, and then suddenly he rolled to the side and vomited.

Severus cleaned the mess up with a wave of his wand and grabbed Draco
around the shoulders as the blond began trembling.

―Oh god Harry I - I’m so sorry - I,‖ Draco sobbed brokenly, and all

29

Severus could do was hold him, but then Draco was pulling away and
trying to stand once again. ―I’ve got to go stop him.‖

―Draco he’s already left,‖ Severus stated softly, but Draco didn’t pause in
throwing on his cloak.

―Then I’ve got to find him. I’ve got to protect him. I’ve got to bring him
back,‖ Draco stated quickly buttoning the clasp of his cloak before
snatching his wand up and heading for the floo. Severus sighed but
followed behind his godson to offer Draco whatever support he could.

They arrived at the Ministry and Draco immediately made a bee line for
the front desk. ―Harry Potter - I need to speak with Harry Potter,‖ he
demanded of the startled young woman.

―I’m sorry sir, but who are you?‖ She questioned not recognizing Draco
immediately.

―Damn it woman!‖ Draco shouted impatiently. ―If you don’t tell me where
Harry Potter is this instant you won’t be able to get a job as a whore on
the corner of Knockturn Alley by the time I’m through with you!‖

Severus placed a restraining hand on Draco’s shoulder and addressed
the pale woman himself. ―This is Lord Draco Malfoy, Lord Potter’s fiancé,‖
he answered calmly and immediately the flustered woman began to go
through her list of visitors.

―It says here Harry Potter left the Ministry about an hour ago,‖ she
stuttered, flinching when Draco growled and not protesting one bit as he
and Severus moved past her desk and toward one of the elevators
without getting a visitors pass.

Severus didn’t know how but somehow they managed to make it to the
Head Auror’s office unhindered, and without thought Draco burst
through the door. ―What’s the meaning of this?‖ Kingsley exclaimed,
while standing to his feet and pulling his wand. He was in a meeting with
what looked like another high ranking Auror who had also stood and
pulled his wand—this wasn’t exactly the greatest department to be
bursting into people offices.

―Where’s Harry?‖ Draco demanded immediately and without explanation,
but there was no time for that.

―I’m sorry Mr… Lord Malfoy, but I don’t see how that is any of your
business,‖ Kingsley stated, lowering his wand as he recognized both
Draco and Severus. ―Now, despite the fact that you barged into my office

30

so rudely I’ll kindly ask you to leave it, before I find someone to escort
you out.‖

―It damn well is my business and you’ll tell me where Harry is or I’ll
withdraw all Malfoy funding toward the Auror program.‖ Draco
threatened and Severus could see Kingsley pale. In order to get Harry to
agree not to become an Auror Draco had agreed to fund the Auror
program, which had seriously needed to money.

―Lord Potter is no longer here. He left about an hour ago and I doubt he
will be returning.‖ Kingsley answered, lips pressed tightly together in
irritation at being threatened.

Severus had to grab Draco’s shoulder quickly to steady him before his
godson collapsed right there. ―Where—where did you send him?‖ he
questioned barely able to catch his breath.

Kingsley frowned now, brow creased in worry as he took in Draco’s
reaction to his answer. ―Lord Malfoy, I think you should sit down—―

―No, just tell me where you sent Harry!‖ Draco snapped pulling himself
back together, but only just, as Severus could still feel him trembling.

―Lord Malfoy I didn’t send Lord Potter anywhere,‖ Kingsley replied in
confusion.

―But the mission…‖

Kingsley finally seemed to understand what Draco was so upset over and
any anger he’d felt toward the blond for bursting into his office and
making demands seemed to dissipate. ―I see you’ve gotten your memory
back then,‖ he said but it was more a statement of fact than a question.
―Lord Malfoy, Harry didn’t go on the mission. He backed out of it at the
last moment—which quite frankly I’m happy he did. Harry left the
Ministry about an hour ago, but as far as I know he was going home.‖

The relief that overtook Draco caused him to lose what little composure
he had as he sank against Severus and let his godfather hold him for a
moment. Neither Kingsley nor the other Auror said anything about
Draco’s moment of weakness though. ―Thank you Kingsley,‖ Severus
stated gratefully as he pulled Draco with him out of the room.

Severus led Draco to an empty elevator to give him some privacy, for a
moment at least, so that he could regain himself. ―He didn’t go,‖ Draco
whispered in a daze as he leaned against the wall. ―Why didn’t he go?‖

31

―I don’t know much about Harry—well actually I have learned quite a bit
about him over the last year… more than I ever wanted to know really…‖
Severus trailed off, but then shook himself. ―I do know that Harry is a
man of his word, and he made a promise to you Draco, and I’m guessing
he decided to keep that promise despite having to live his life without
you.‖

( )

Draco stood outside of Number 12 Grimmauld Place, clenching his fist
nervously as he raised it to knock on the door. He didn’t know exactly
why he was so nervous, but he thought that perhaps he was scared of
the state Harry would be in when he answered to door. Draco didn’t
know what he was going to say, didn’t know if he would say anything
considering all he wanted to do was grab Harry and never let go of him.

The door opened a crack and a big brown eye peered up at him from the
darkness within the manor. The eye widened and the door open wider to
reveal Dobby. ―What is Master Draco doing here? Dobby has packed all
of Master Draco’s things and was just sending them to his Manor.‖

―I’m not here for my things Dobby. Is Harry home?‖ he questioned feeling
his heart constrict as he saw the few boxes with his belongings sitting in
the foyer waiting for the owls to take them.

If possible Dobby’s ears dropped further. ―Master Harry is not accepting
visitors right now—he is not feeling well,‖ Dobby answered softly.

Draco knelt down in front of the little elf—Harry’s favorite if he
remembered correctly. ―I intend to make Master Harry better if you will
allow me entrance.‖

Dobby’s ears perked up. ―Really, you is remembering now? You is
making Master all better. He be missing you. He be heartsick.‖

―Yes, I remember everything Dobby, now can you show me to Harry?‖
Draco questioned anxious to get to Harry.

―Yes, come with Dobby.‖ Dobby led him into the familiar manor and
down a hall to where Harry’s person study was located. ―Master Harry be
in there. He is not coming out for days and days and is not eating
anything Dobby brings him.‖

Draco frowned heavily at hearing that and pushed open the study door.
Harry was curled up in a chair by the fireplace and wasn’t awake. Draco
felt his heart stick in his throat and walked quickly over to make sure

32

that Harry was indeed only sleeping.

―Dobby will you go run a warm bath for Harry and fix him some soup?‖
Draco questioned and immediately Dobby disappeared to do as he was
asked.

Draco took the time to study Harry and the broken sight of his love was
nearly his undoing. It was clear that Harry hadn’t been taking care of
himself. There were dried tear tracks down Harry’s face and an empty
bottle of brandy sitting on the table in front of him, which made it
obvious that Harry had drank himself into unconsciousness. His hair
was greasy and his clothes wrinkled, which indicated that he’d most
likely been wearing the same clothes for days now.

Harry had lost even more weight then since the last time he’d seen him
at graduation, and the bruises under his eyes made them look almost
black. His skin was pale and clammy, which had Draco checking him for
fever, and he was relieve to find none. There were pictures and letters
strewn everywhere, all of the pictures of Draco and Harry during their
happiest times, and the letters all half written pleas for Draco to
remember something—anything.

It killed Draco, and all he could do was gather Harry’s unconscious, and
entirely too light, body to him and cry—cry and plead for Harry to forgive
him.

( )

When Harry woke up he felt somehow… better.

Had Dobby cleaned him up and brought him to bed? Why didn’t he feel
exhausted? Why didn’t he have a pounding headache? Was that soup he
smelled?

Harry didn’t understand it. He’d specifically told Dobby not to disturbed
him, and despite the sandwiches that would pop into his study ever now
and again Dobby had kept to his orders. Harry shifted and sat up,
surprised to find that his body felt better. His muscle didn’t ache, the
weariness that had seeped into his bones was gone, and despite not
having eaten the in days the hunger pains weren’t piercing through his
stomach.

Harry felt altogether stronger.

―Dob—Dobby,‖ he tried to shout, but it came out as a hoarse croak
instead.

33

―I gave him the day off. I hope you don’t mind,‖ a familiar voice said from
the doorway and Harry slammed his eyes closed tightly. This was a
dream, that’s why he felt so good… it was all a dream.

The bed dipped and Harry couldn’t breathe as very real fingers touched
his face. ―Harry look at me. I remember now. This isn’t a dream. You
aren’t dreaming. I’m here. I’m real and I love you.‖ Draco’s voice
whispered as his hand moved to run through Harry’s hair while the other
cupped the side of Harry’s face.

Harry slowly opened his eyes, willing this to be real, willing those words
to be real, and he was met with silver eyes so full of love and longing that
he felt his heart slowly piecing itself back together again in that one look.
He knew he probably should have said something, but words failed him,
and he collapsed against Draco clinging to him and sobbing tears he
hadn’t thought he’d had any more of. Draco’s arms wrapped around him
tightly, whispering words of love and apology into his ear over and over
again, as he was rocked in that strong embrace.

―You’re here—you remember,‖ Harry gasped as he was finally able to pull
back and stare up at Draco’s face. Draco had tears falling from his own
eyes as well and that only helped prove to Harry that Draco really did
remember, because the old Draco would have never let such weakness
show in front of anyone, much less Harry Potter.

―I remember everything,‖ Draco replied wiping Harry’s tears away with
his fingers. ―I remember that the hat wanted to put you in Slytherin first,
I remember that you love strawberry’s dipped in brown sugar, that your
favorite feature is your eyes because they remind you of your mother—
and I remember that they’re one of mine too. I remember that another
one of mine is the birthmark you have on the inside of your right thigh,
the spot on your neck that drives you crazy when I sink my teeth into it,
the freckles that map out your body—I remember what each one tastes
like.‖

―This has got to be a dream,‖ Harry breathed in disbelief.

―It’s not,‖ Draco answered, taking Harry’s hand that was clinging to his
shoulder and placing it over his heart. ―It’s not a dream and I’m not going
anywhere.‖

Harry looked at him and Draco was ready to catch him when he shot
forward for a kiss. Harry’s hands immediately went to his hair, and
Draco nearly laughed as he remembered once again the fact that Harry
loved messing up his hair because he was the only one who could get

34

away with it. Draco held him close, wrapping both arms completely
around Harry and pulling him tightly into his own body, until Harry was
straddling him.

Harry keened desperately into the kiss and Draco had him on his back in
seconds. They didn’t stop kissing as Draco began thrusting his hips into
Harry’s. Harry met him thrust for thrust, wrapping his legs around
Draco’s waist and arching into him frantically. They didn’t even try to
remove any clothing knowing that neither of them would last that long
and when they finally exploded against each other Draco wrapped
himself around Harry and held his warm body close.

―I never did this with anyone else I swear to you,‖ Draco whispered in
Harry’s ear and felt Harry trembling in relief. ―Even though my memories
were gone, looking at someone else always felt wrong. My body still loved
you, even if my mind couldn’t remember it.‖ Then just to prove it to
Harry, Draco stripped them both bare and made love to him again, and
again, and again, until Harry fell into an exhausted but peaceful sleep
still clinging to him.

( )

―I thought I’d really lost you,‖ Harry whispered later that night as they
lay side by side simply basking in each other’s presence. Harry couldn’t
take his eyes off of Draco’s face, and Draco didn’t seem inclined to look
away from Harry either. ―I thought you were never coming back and I
was going to have to go on without you… and I—I couldn’t… I couldn’t
Dray—‖

―Shh… shh…‖ Draco soothed kissing Harry gently and holding him even
closer if that were at all possible. ―After my memories came back and I
regained consciousness I went straight to the Ministry. I was so scared I
wouldn’t make it in time to stop you and when they told me you’d
already left—god Harry I thought I was going to lose it... but then
Kingsley told me you’d backed out of the mission, that you’d only gone
home, and I—I was so relieved. I don’t know what I’d do if I ever lost you,
and I’m so fucking sorry you had to go through a whole year of feeling
what I felt for those ten minutes. You may forgive me but I don’t think I’ll
ever forgive myself for what I put you through.‖

―It wasn’t your fault,‖ Harry whispered rubbing Draco’s arm soothingly.

―Why did you back out of the mission?‖ Draco questioned curiously,
although he didn’t like thinking about the fact that Harry had only taken
the mission in order to kill himself.

―Because I remembered that I’d made a promise to you,‖ Harry whispered

35

while watching Draco’s fingers play with his own. ―I promised you that I
wouldn’t intentionally put myself in danger like that—that I wouldn’t
allow anything to take me away from you.‖

Draco leaned forward and captured Harry’s lips in a deep kiss that lasted
for a good ten minutes, until they were both panting and hot again.

―I seem to recall now making a promise to you as well,‖ Draco whispered
as he slipped something familiar around Harry’s left ring finger. Harry
felt his heart stutter in his chest as Draco cupped his face and looked at
him deeply. ―Harry, will you marry me?‖ he asked once again and Harry
answered him with a kiss.

( )

The Potter-Malfoy wedding wasn’t anything spectacular. In fact, only one
person was in attendance to act as witness and that was Severus Snape.
The media would tell their story for a long time to come however and an
investigation into Hogwarts and it’s Headmaster would be launched due
to public demand to figure out what legal reasoning the Headmaster had
for keeping Harry away from his fiancé, and also to find out what had
been done to find the person responsible for Draco’s amnesia.

Harry and Draco weren’t concerned about any of that however - of
course, they wanted to find the person responsible and punish them, but
at the moment they were on their long overdue honeymoon, far away
from it all and too busy being together to care.