Two Cities

Fifty years lasts the war between two neighbor-cities in north east of central Poland. Those two cities, Bydgoszcz and Torun, are fighting over everything. Which one is better, bigger, more prosperous, which has a better speedway team, and which should be the capital of the new county.
Of course everybody knows that Bydgoszcz is far ahead of Torun. Bydgoszcz is bigger, louder, and has higher crime rate. Whole center of the city is filled with beautiful modern square-shaped buildings. We have one small park, but it is filled to the top with garbage! That is an advantage. At least we see signs of civilization like empty beer cans and garbage from nearby McDonald's. And what Torun has? 6they are smaller, older, and quieter. It is filled with 500 years old buildings and castles. Besides the gay that “moved” the earth - Copernicus lied there. Why would one want to move the earth?
Now we can clearly see the superiority of Bydgoszcz over Torun and it is not only city's appearance. We are better at sports for example. We have bigger and stronger fans, so ours can beat crap out of theirs. Yes we are superior. So there is a question why such an inferior city is going to be a head of new county. I guess this is a plot of another “city” namely Warsaw, we will show them! What they know, they don't know anything. So what that Bydgoszcz has millions of dollars in debt and limping economy. Does it matter that we have the highest unemployment and underage drinking rates in the country? I say make Bydgoszcz a new capital.

---