Table of Contents

Cover
Copyright Page
Title Page
UNMENTIONABLE: THE MEN

WHO LOVED ON THE TITANIC

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
OTHER LYD TITLES BY RYAN

FIELD

Endmatter

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Unmentionable:

The Men Who Loved On the Titanic

Copyright©2012 Ryan Field

His and His Kisses Edition

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UNMENTIONABLE:

THE MEN WHO LOVED ON

THE TITANIC

BY

RYAN FIELD

The kind of love no one spoke about 100 years

ago.

.

UNMENTIONABLE:

THE MEN WHO LOVED ON THE

TITANIC

“

I

absolutely refuse to wear dainty, frilly under-

garments and a corset on the Titanic,” Liam said.
To emphasize his feelings, he punched a wall next
to a tall bookcase. A brass candlestick tipped and
landed on the floor. “And I’m not wearing
women’s shoes. This is absurd, Oliver. I’m a man,
not a woman.” Then he kicked the baseboard.

Oliver Prendergast crossed to where Liam was

standing and picked up the candlestick. He placed
it back on the shelf and then set both palms gently
on Liam’s bare bottom. They were both naked in
Oliver’s bedroom, in the tiny, hidden flat Oliver
had been renting in London for the past six months
so his staff wouldn’t find out about his young, male
lover, Liam Singleton.

Oliver moved his palms up and down Liam’s

buttocks and said, “There’s no other way, my love.
Discretion is extremely important right now if
you’re going to return to America with me.”

Liam turned so fast, his penis slapped against

his thigh. He sent Oliver a glare and said, “Why
can’t I just go as part of your staff? I don’t mind
acting as your valet or whatever way you want to
describe me. I just want to be a man, not a
woman.”

Oliver turned and walked to the window. He ran

his fingers through his dark brown hair and took a
deep breath. “Because that would be too
conspicuous, my love. We don’t have enough time
to set up a new plan. Everyone knows I never
travel with more than three staff members. And
what would I tell my staff? They’d suspect
something immediately if I brought in a handsome,
young man now, and I can’t take any chances in my
position. I’ve already booked a first-class suite on
the Titanic and I’ve told everyone I’m escorting
my shy, female, third cousin back to America.
People would ask too many questions if I changed
plans now. They’d wonder what happened to my

cousin.”

“This is insane,” Liam said. “No one is going to

believe it. And I’ll be the one who winds up
getting in trouble.”

“Trust me, it will work. I wish there were

another way.”

When Liam heard the low, disappointed tone in

Oliver’s voice, he slowly walked to the window
and leaned into his back. Although there was about
a twenty-year age difference, Liam had never met a
man who could satisfy his needs and emotions the
way Oliver did. At forty-one, Oliver was just as
good as any man in his twenties or thirties if not
better. He didn’t have any inhibitions or
insecurities. But more than that, no one had ever
been so devoted to Liam in his entire life. So he
put his arms around Oliver and kissed the back of
his neck. “I’ll do this for you. But I’m not going to
like it. And I’m not wearing anything dainty or
frilly. I’ll wear one of those long corsets to cover
my groin, but that’s it. The thought of dressing up
as a woman is bad enough at any time. But to have
to spend that entire time crossing the Atlantic on a

ship dressed as a woman kills me. What if
someone figures it out? And what if the ship sinks?
I’d rather die as a man, with dignity.”

Oliver turned and wrapped his strong arms

around Liam’s slim, naked body. Oliver stood six
inches taller than Liam, and his hands were much
larger. Those large hands and thick fingers went
down and rested on Liam’s firm, round bottom. As
Oliver leaned forward to inhale Liam’s scent, he
said, “First, no one will ever guess that you’re not
a woman. You’re the perfect height at five six.
You’re so soft and pretty, and your features are so
delicate, it’s the last thing anyone would think.
Second, this is the most securely built ship in the
world, and it’s unsinkable. So, stop worrying
about the little things, and let me take care of
everything. All you have to do is put on that corset
and look pretty for me. And think on the brighter
side, we’ll be able to be seen together, dine
together, and stroll the ship together. We’ve never
shared that luxury most take for granted. If you
went as a male member of my staff, I wouldn’t be
able to socialize with you at all. I don’t socialize

with my staff. Ever.”

Liam arched his back and spread his legs wider.

His arms went up and he started to caress the back
of his older lover’s head the way he knew Oliver
liked to be touched. Although Liam was all man in
every sense of the word, from his thick brown hair
to his strong character, Liam knew in his heart that
if he worked hard at it, he could pass as a woman
without any problems at all. At least he could do
this if he paid close attention to his mannerisms
and his speech. Other than his soft features and his
smooth skin, there was nothing effeminate about
Liam. It’s just that he didn’t have much body hair
and his physique was thin and shapelier than most
men his age. At a glance, he’d often been mistaken
for a young woman, which had led to more than
one embarrassing moment for other people. So, he
kissed Oliver on the mouth and sighed. “It’s just
that I’ve worked so hard all my life to act as
masculine as possible. I’ve overcompensated to
make a point of this, so no one would know I was
attracted to other men. And now you want me to
act like a woman on purpose. It goes against all my

principles.”

Oliver led him to the bed, and he sat down first.

He spread his legs and reached for Liam’s thin
waist. Then, he pulled Liam closer and guided his
body toward his lap. “Let’s just have a little fun
with it,” Liam said. “It’s only for this voyage.
Once we reach America and I file for divorce, you
can go back to being the strong, proud young man
that you are and you’ll never have to do this again.
For now, we’ll just pretend it’s a peculiar little
secret between us. I can’t tell you how excited I
get when I think about you in a corset. I get very
excited, my love. My heart beats so fast, I can’t
even think straight.”

Liam adjusted his body so his bottom would be

against Oliver’s erection. One of the things he’d
always loved most about his older lover’s body
was the thickness of what hung between his legs.
He reached up and wrapped his arms around
Oliver’s shoulders and frowned. “I’m starting to
get the feeling you want me to dress up in things
like corsets and heels. You’ve always been that
way with me. You have a very naughty side you

don’t speak about often.”

Oliver kissed his shoulder and lowered his left

hand. He slid his fingers between Liam’s legs and
up the bottom of Liam’s ass. When he reached
Liam’s anus, he rubbed it and said, “I can’t deny
this. But I feel that way about everything you wear
all the time. Everything about you makes me forget
all my inhibitions, and all I want to do is climb on
top of you and open your legs. You’ve turned me
into a raging maniac in my middle age.”

Liam smiled. He moved forward and kissed

Oliver on the mouth. As their tongues locked, they
fell back on the bed. They kissed for a minute and
then Liam asked, “Do you want to open my legs
right now?” An hour earlier, Oliver had fucked
him on his side and Liam wasn’t sure Oliver was
up for a repeat performance so soon.

“Can’t you tell without asking?” Oliver said.

Then he guided Liam’s hand down between his
legs and pressed it into his crotch.

Liam took his erection in his palm and gently

wrapped his fingers around the shaft. The shaft
was so broad his thumb barely met his middle

finger. He stroked slowly and said, “I wasn’t sure.
We did this no more than one hour ago. I don’t
want to overexert you.” He said this on purpose,
knowing

Oliver

would

react

even

more

aggressively if challenged.

Oliver turned him over, climbed on top of him,

and pinned him to the unmade bed. The sheets still
smelled damp and tweedy, as if two men had been
fucking each other an hour ago. He held Liam’s
arms back, way above his head and said, “Don’t
worry about overexerting me, my love. As you can
see, I’m more than up for another round. All you
have to do is open those soft legs and close your
eyes.”

Liam reached for Oliver’s dick again. His own

dick was hard, resting flat on his stomach. He
stroked his lover faster and said, “I see how eager
you are.” He lifted his legs and spread them. “So,
what are you waiting for?”

Oliver glanced down at him and smiled. After

he kissed him, he moved back and pointed the head
of his dick into the small, tight opening between
Liam’s legs. He spit on his shaft and rubbed his

saliva up and down. Then he spit on Liam’s hole
and lubricated the lips of his anus with two
fingers. Sometimes they used gun oil as a personal
lubricant, but Oliver preferred his own saliva and
Liam didn’t mind in the least. Oliver worked
fast…as he always did. He was an eager lover
who didn’t like to waste time getting in and out.
When he was certain Liam was ready to take him,
he plunged into Liam’s body with one quick thrust
and started to grind his hips immediately.

His quickness and precision always filled Liam

with so much pleasure, he had trouble controlling
his voice and containing his emotions. He’d been
with other men before Oliver. Many men in
boarding school who were younger and could last
slightly longer. But never had a man taken Liam
with so much force and determination as Oliver.
So to keep from moaning too loudly and screaming
for more, Liam threw his arms back over his head
and stretched his muscles as hard as he could. The
wider he spread his legs, the deeper and harder
Oliver went. Liam pointed his toes and clenched
his fists together. When Oliver fucked in any

position, he pulled all the way out and then
plunged all the way in again each time. The
friction this rough, intrusive fucking created
between Liam’s legs was often more than he could
handle. Sometimes, it was more than the bed could
handle, too. This time, the lumpy mattress in the
rented flat rocked so violently, a porcelain basin
fell off the table next to the bed and shattered on
the floor.

This didn’t stop Oliver. He only started pulling

out and poking harder, to the point where Liam
could feel and hear Oliver’s balls slapping against
the bottom of his ass. This is when Liam usually
started to whimper and moan and plead. He often
wished they were alone on an island, so he could
scream and no one would overhear him. On that
particular morning, he reached up and grabbed
Oliver’s biceps and squeezed them so hard, his
knuckles turned white. While he squeezed, he
whispered and begged Oliver to give it to him
harder and faster. He looked into Oliver’s eyes
and said, “I want all of you. I want every last
ounce of you inside my body. I want it deep and

hard. Don’t stop, please don’t stop.”

When he spoke this way, he knew it affected

Oliver in a strong way. His face turned red, and he
started to breathe heavier. He moved faster and
grunted with a tone that could have been mistaken
for agony instead of ecstasy. The vein in his
forehead popped and sweat started to trickle down
his sideburns. Liam felt him swell inside his body.
A minute or two later, Oliver’s entire body
shuddered and he slammed into Liam’s ass so
hard, the entire bedframe rocked and one side
pulled away from the wall. While he filled Liam a
second time that morning, Liam took his own penis
and stroked it a few times. He didn’t have to work
hard. A minute after he touched himself, the head
of his dick expanded and he came. Oliver was still
deep inside him, still pushing as hard as he could
to deposit every ounce he had to give.

Their lovemaking always ended the same way

whenever they were in this classic position. Oliver
remained inside and fell on top of Liam. And
thankfully, Liam had the ability to keep his legs
spread for long periods of time without

discomfort. Though Liam was pinned and
completely out of breath, he didn’t want to release
Oliver until the last minute, so he wrapped his
arms around Oliver’s shoulders and held him
tightly.

He massaged Oliver’s muscles and licked his

ear. Then, he crossed his ankles at the base of
Oliver’s spine and applied pressure so Oliver
wouldn’t slide out too soon. He drew Oliver into
his body deeper, feeling the wetness, savoring the
smells. As an added measure, Liam tightened his
sphincter muscle, clamped the lips of his anus
around Oliver’s shaft, and applied as much
pressure as he could. In this respect, Liam had
always been exceptional. He could control the lips
of his anus the way most people could control their
fingers when they gripped something in their
hands. Oliver always said it was as if Liam made
a fist between his legs and held him with a death
grip. There had been times, especially when
Oliver had been inside him long enough to go
completely soft, he had to beg Liam to loosen up
and release him.

As Oliver rested on top of Liam that morning, he

sighed and said, “I’ve always sworn you had a
steel trap between your legs. I’ve never felt
anything quite like it. The tightness and control
amazes me each time I’m inside you.”

Liam rubbed his heel up and down Oliver’s

lower back. Being on the bottom, beneath the man
he loved so much, made him feel safe and secure.
He laughed and said, “You’re just a very dirty
man.”

“Ah, but you like dirty, nasty men like me,”

Oliver said. They often joked around this way. It
was part of their private game in bed. “Wait until
you see all the dirty, awful, terrible things I’m
going to do to you when I see you in that corset on
the ship. You might want to push me overboard
halfway to America.”

“If you’re not good, I’ll make you beg, mister,”

Liam said. He wasn’t serious. This was another
joke they played with each other. He knew how
much Oliver liked to beg for it sometimes. For
Oliver, begging Liam to bend over was half the
fun. “But I’d never push you overboard. I’d never

do anything to harm you.” He’d never spoken this
way to another man, with these intimate tones and
offbeat words. Though he’d had male lovers, he’d
never actually been in love. With Oliver, he often
found unusual, unexpected words coming from his
mouth he never would have said under normal
circumstances.

“Do you have everything ready for the voyage?”

Oliver asked. He was trying to move his hips so he
could pull out, but Liam had clamped down on his
dick so hard, he couldn’t do much.

“Yes,” Liam said. “I’m ready. But I’m not

wearing the frilly things under the dresses. That’s
just too much to ask. No one will know.” He’d
asked a good, trusted female friend to shop for him
and get everything ready, from the long corset to
the soft, blond wig he would wear throughout the
voyage. Oliver had given him plenty of money to
buy the best styles available a young, unmarried
woman would wear while traveling with her older
male cousin. His friend had other friends in the
theater that helped her. Liam didn’t go into all the
details with his friend about why he needed to

dress as a woman and have enough of a woman’s
wardrobe to cross the Atlantic on the Titanic, but
he did tell her this was one of the most important
things he’d ever done in his life. She was a good
friend; he knew he could trust her. She never
questioned him or probed for more information
than he was willing to offer.

“We sail tomorrow,” Oliver said. “I have a very

busy day, and I still have many things to do before
I leave London. I’m not sure when I’m coming
back here next. So you have to let go of me this
instant. I have to get up and get dressed now.”

“I don’t want to let go of you yet,” Liam said,

tightening his grip. “I want to hold you inside as
long as I can.” He would release him soon. He
knew Oliver was an extremely important, wealthy
businessman and he had appointments all over
London that afternoon. He only wanted to tease
him for a few more minutes.

Oliver kissed his neck. He tried to pull out, but

his dick was wedged into Liam’s hole, and it
would budge. “I’d like to stay inside you for the
rest of the day, but I have to get dressed now. So

you have to open up that steel trap down there and
kiss me goodbye.”

“It’s going to be okay when we get to America,

isn’t it?” Liam asked. He was leaving London
because Oliver had asked him to leave. Though
Liam had been born in Boston, he’d spent the last
nine years of his life in England. He’d lost his
mother and father in a fire the summer before he
entered high school. They left a reasonable estate
that kept him comfortable. At the time of their
deaths, the only living relative Liam had was an
old uncle in London who had been named his
guardian. So Liam went to England and entered a
boarding school. He visited the uncle on holiday,
but there was always something missing. The uncle
was very old, not well, and lived a quiet, secluded
life. He died when Liam was in his last year of
Cambridge.

“You’re going to be fine,” Oliver said. “I’d

never let anything happen to you. You have to trust
me. I love you more than life itself.”

“I love you just as much. I’m worried about

what it will be like. I haven’t been to America

since I was twelve years old. My entire life is here
in England. I have no one over there now.” He was
twenty-one. He’d graduated from the university
and was ready to begin his life. Up until he met
Oliver at a social gathering with friends of his
from the university, he thought he’d be starting his
new adult life in London, not in New York. And
certainly not in the arms of a man twenty years his
senior whom he loved more than life itself.

Oliver tried to pull out, but he was completely

soft now and Liam was clamping down extra hard.
“You’ll be fine. In fact, you’ll adjust in no time at
all. You don’t even sound British. I’m surprised
you never lost your Boston accent for a British
accent. You sound more Yank than I do
sometimes.”

People were always telling Liam he had a

Boston accent. But he didn’t think so. He didn’t
think he had any accent. “I’m starting to look
forward to it. I haven’t been to my mother’s and
father’s graves once since they were buried. All
the memories are so vague. I sometimes feel guilty
for not feeling enough emotion. I was so young

when they were killed in the fire.”

“I’ll take you to their graves as soon as we are

in America, but if you don’t release me right now,
neither one of us will ever get out of this bed.”

This time, Liam sighed out loud. He hated to let

go; he always experienced a sense of loss when
Oliver left him. He grabbed Oliver’s rugged,
handsome face, held it in his hands, and he kissed
him one more time. While his tongue was deep in
Oliver’s mouth, he loosened his grip and Oliver’s
flaccid cock slipped out of his body.

When Oliver finally climbed off the bed and

stood up, Liam remained on his back for a minute,
watching the way Oliver moved.

Oliver sent him a backward glance and asked,

“Why are you staring at me? I feel awkward now.”

Liam smiled. “Please don’t. I’m just admiring

your body. You are all man.”

“Now, I feel even more awkward. My body is

nothing like yours. There’s nothing smooth or soft
about it.”

“Ah well,” Liam said. He got up and crawled to

the end of the bed on his hands and knees with his

back arched. He licked between Oliver’s legs and
said, “I’m glad your body is nothing like mine. I
wish I had more hair on my legs and bigger
muscles in my arms.” Then he licked Oliver’s
solid thigh and inhaled the strong scent coming
from between his legs.

“Why on earth would you say that?” Oliver

seemed truly stunned. “You’re magnificent. I
sometimes wonder why you’d want to be with
someone older like me when you can have any
younger man you want.”

“I’m glad because you’re all man, in every

sense of the word,” Liam said. “Your legs are
hairy, but not too much hair. Your chest is broad
and solid, with just the right amount of hair across
the middle. I love every inch of it. In fact,
sometimes I worry that you’re too much man for
me. I worry that you’ll go back to your wife and
cancel the divorce or find another woman and toss
me aside.”

He knew he was getting a little carried away.

But he was speaking the truth: he did have these
insecurities about Oliver. When other young men

like him in boarding school were dreaming and
fantasizing about other young men, Liam had been
dreaming and fantasizing about older, stronger men
like Oliver who would come and take him away
from his meager existence. Liam had always
preferred rougher, stronger men; he liked his men
to smell and taste like men. There were nights
when he slept with his face buried in Oliver’s
armpit, because it calmed his fears. He never
would have admitted this aloud to anyone; they
would have thought he’d lost his mind. He knew
there were some who would have locked him up in
a mental institution for feeling the way he did
about men. He might even go to prison if they knew
how much he liked taking Oliver’s dick in his ass.
And now that he’d finally met and fallen in love
with the man of his dreams, it almost seemed too
good to be true.

“You never have to worry about me being too

much man for you. I’m never going to let you go.
I’ve waited all my life for someone like you, and
nothing is going to take you away from me. You
are the piece of my life that’s been missing all

along.” Then, he reached back and slapped Liam
hard on the ass.

“That hurt.” But he arched his back and spread

his legs, hoping Oliver would slap him again. His
body tingled whenever Oliver hit his buttocks this
way.

Oliver laughed. “You love it when I spank you.”

He slapped him again three more times and
finished with a gentle punch. He then turned and
walked to his dressing-room door. “Now, be good
and get dressed. You have to be packed and ready
to leave by tonight. I’ll send someone to pick you
up around seven and we’ll meet at the hotel. I
arranged it so we’d have an adjoining room. This
is when I’ll begin to introduce you as my niece,
slowly. I’ve already set it up and my staff is
expecting you. We’ll have dinner and get a good
night’s sleep so we’ll be fresh for the voyage.”

Liam wasn’t looking forward to this. He still

wasn’t certain he could pass as a woman. But he
didn’t want to complain anymore. He knew Oliver
had gone to a great deal of trouble and expense to
work this plan out. So he laughed and said, “What

if I sneak into your room late tonight in my corset
and climb into bed with you?”

Olive turned and smiled. “Then, I guess we’ll

both we walking with a lighter step tomorrow
when we board the Titanic.”

* * * *

As planned, he’d met Oliver at the hotel the

night before. He’d dressed as a woman for the first
time, but that was nighttime, and he felt more
comfortable in the dark.

To his utter amazement, no one seemed to

suspect a thing at the hotel. Oliver’s small staff
treated Liam as if he really were Oliver’s young
third cousin traveling to America. Oliver made a
point of telling everyone his young cousin was shy,
and he introduced him as Edwina instead of Liam.

The only mistake was that the women’s clothing

he was wearing seemed a little too sophisticated
for a younger woman. Liam was dressed more like
a wealthy married woman than a young, single
virgin. He wore a full-length, dark fur coat with a
matching fur that his friend had purchased for him.

Liam wasn’t even certain what kind of fur it was.
He didn’t think it was important to know; he’d left
all this up to his friend. And the dress he wore to
dinner in the hotel was a black and white formal
affair, with a high empire waist that tapered down
well below his ankles. It was far too formal a
gown for someone his age. And he’d stuffed his
bosom with way too many scarves, trying to
overcompensate.

After dinner, on the way up to their adjoining

rooms, a young, male employee at the hotel almost
tripped over his own feet when he spotted Liam
passing by in women’s clothing. The poor guy had
been carrying an empty tray back to the kitchen.
When he took one look at the way Liam’s large
bust narrowed into a pencil-thin waist and slim,
shapely hips, he missed a step and the tray flew out
of his hands and landed next to a tall potted palm
with a loud clatter that made everyone stop and
stare.

Oliver was walking beside Liam at the time. He

had Liam’s elbow in his hand, and he was guiding
him toward a large, grand staircase as casually and

normally as any older male cousin would do.
When he saw the way the other men were watching
Liam dressed as a woman, he leaned into Liam’s
side and said, “This might have been a bad idea
after all.”

Liam turned fast and gaped at him. “Why?

What’s wrong? Do I look like a man?” His heart
started beating faster. The blond wig felt awkward
on his head, and he was terrified it might come off
at any minute. Besides that, most women in those
days didn’t like full wigs unless they were older
and losing their own hair. At least the color of the
wig was a soft, pale blond and looked natural. He
wore it pinned up in the back; the top and sides
covered a good deal of his face.

“Calm down. Nothing’s wrong. It’s just that I’ve

never seen so many men turn and gawk at a young
woman this way. These young men really do think
you’re an exotic young girl. I find it very amusing,
indeed.” Then, he laughed and smiled at an older
couple passing by.

Liam could have lived without this compliment.

He sent Oliver a stern look and said, “I don’t think

this is funny. Let’s just get up to the room where
it’s safe.”

Only it happened again the next morning when

they boarded the Titanic. Almost every man Liam
passed turned and sent him a lewd, obnoxious
glance. A couple of rough-looking, young guys…it
was always the rough ones he attracted most…in
the crew poked each other and murmured things
Liam couldn’t hear. But when one licked his lips,
Liam had a feeling he knew what they were saying.

The other women Liam passed just looked him

over twice and frowned. A few glanced at their
own plain, freckled, milquetoast daughters Liam’s
age and shook their heads in disappointment. Liam
couldn’t wait to get on the ship and into the private
suite he would be sharing with Oliver. He planned
to spend most of the voyage there, as quietly and
discreetly as possible. And as far away from the
rough-looking guys in the crew as possible, too.

But Oliver had different plans. The first evening

on board the Titanic, he grabbed Liam by the waist
and said, “Go put on something gorgeous and
transform yourself into a pretty girl for me. We’re

having dinner with friends of mine from America.
And I want to show off my beautiful, young
cousin.”

Liam was naked. He had just blown Oliver on

the bathroom floor and his lips were still swollen.
He could still taste Oliver’s dick in his mouth. He
flung him a glance and said, “I was thinking that
I’d stay in here and have dinner alone. You should
go without me. I don’t think I should be walking
around so casually. Someone might figure us out.
And the way these men leer at me makes me
uncomfortable. If this is what women have to deal
with all the time, I certainly do feel sorry for them.
If anyone asks about me, tell them I’m the frail type
and I’m not feeling well. Make up something, like
I’m prone to headaches. I don’t care what anyone
thinks. For all I care, you can tell them I had a visit
from my Aunt Flo.”

“Nonsense.” He laughed at the Aunt Flo

reference to menstruation. “You are my introverted
cousin, and I’m escorting you to America. No one
will suspect anything at all. There’s no reason for
you to hole up alone in here during this voyage.

This is the biggest and most luxurious ship on the
sea, and we’re going to enjoy every single minute
we’re here. We’re making history, and you don’t
even realize it.”

Though Liam had strong reservations about

being seen in public with Oliver, he couldn’t deny
his lover this small tidbit of happiness. All Oliver
was asking was that Liam join him and spend time
with him. Up until now, they’d never had an
opportunity to be seen in public together. He knew
all too well that most of Oliver’s life had been
spent with a cold-hearted woman he didn’t love.
The marriage had been over long before Liam and
Oliver had met. Oliver and his wife hadn’t had
touched each other in years; they slept in separate
bedrooms and lived separate lives. And now that
Oliver was returning to America to get a divorce,
Liam didn’t want to let him down. A strong man
like Oliver needed to know he was loved.

So Liam put on his long corset and stuffed his

bosom. Thankfully, the longer corsets in style then
covered his groin and shielded his genitals. Then
he put on soft red velvet mules with two-inch

heels. He didn’t bother with any other
undergarments or hosiery. There were lines he
refused to cross in order to maintain his own
personal dignity as a man. He figured no one
would know the difference, and he didn’t like
being confined. And if someone did notice the
difference, they shouldn’t have been looking up his
gown in the first place.

The gown he wore was made of red velvet that

matched his shoes, with an empire waist and a hem
that fell to the floor in swoops and gathers.

He spruced up the wig like his friend had

showed him and put it on to cover his short brown
hair. Then, he gazed into a mirror in his dressing
room and blinked. There was no need for any make
up or camouflage. Even he was amazed at how
much he looked like a real woman. He didn’t have
a heavy beard and his smooth skin didn’t have a
blemish or flaw. Even his lips had a natural rose
color most men…and women…didn’t have.

He adjusted the wig and took one last look in the

mirror. Oliver was standing behind him by then.

He reached for Liam’s waist, held it tightly, and

said, “My God, you’re beautiful. I never would
have imagined anything like this if I hadn’t seen it
with my own eyes. Now, I hate to leave the suite.”

Liam reached for his red-velvet evening bag and

turned to face his lover. He lifted his arms and
caressed Oliver’s rugged, handsome face. “I’m
starting to like the idea of being seen with you in
public. I only wish I weren’t your cousin. I’ll have
to be very careful about what I say or do during
dinner. I don’t want people to think you’re doing
something wrong with your innocent, virginal,
maiden cousin. That would be scandalous.”

Oliver’s hands went down and he grabbed

Liam’s ass. The red gown went up and Liam
arched his back. “I think you’re right, because right
now, you have no idea how many scandalous
things I want to do to you in this dress.”

Liam gently smacked Oliver’s cheek and

stepped back. He glanced at Oliver’s formal
dinner clothes and smiled. He would be with the
best-looking, smartest man on the ship that night,
and he took pride in knowing this. He never took it
for granted. “When we return tonight, I’ll let you

do anything you want to do.”

Oliver’s eyes opened wider. He smiled and

said, “You’ll stay dressed up when you come to
bed with me?”

“I said I’d do anything you want me to do.”

* * * *

They sat with friends and acquaintances Oliver

knew from America. Most of them were stuffy and
too old to hold a decent conversation. But there
was one woman at the table, sitting right next to
Liam, that made him smile more than once.

Oliver introduced her as Margaret Brown, but

she quietly scolded Oliver and said, “It’s Maggie,
not Margaret, when I’m with good friends.” Then
she reached out with both arms and gave Oliver a
bear hug.

Though Maggie was a full-figured woman with

a robust voice, she remained relatively silent for
the first few minutes. She smiled and gazed in
Liam’s direction more than once. At one point, she
reached for Liam’s wrist and asked, “Where are
you going when we reach America, Edwina,

dear?” Her voice had a rugged quality she wasn’t
trying to hide. It was even deeper than Liam’s male
voice.

Liam replied to her with a quick answer. He

figured the less he said the better. He lifted his
voice so he would sound like a woman and said,
“New York.”

When Maggie Brown saw she wasn’t going to

get much out of him, she sighed and smoothed out
the napkin on her lap. She didn’t speak up much
after that, at least not until the waiter took their
orders, and she said, “Give me an extra helping of
them haricot verts.” Then she poked Liam in the
ribs and slapped her chubby knee. “I just love it
when they call string beans haricot verts, don’t
you? It kills me, kid. It just kills me I have money
now to live like this.”

While Oliver spent most of the evening talking

to people on the other side of the table, Liam
wound up listening to Maggie Brown tell stories
about how much she hated the way people treated
her back in Denver. She seemed to be letting her
frustrations out, as if she trusted him. Liam only

spoke when she asked him a direct question. He
nodded and smiled and shrugged without saying
more than three- or four-word sentences.

But by the end of the evening, when he thought

he’d pulled off being a woman, Maggie Brown
leaned into his side and slapped his knee. She’d
had a little too much wine and her eyes were
glazed and small. “You’re not fooling me,
sweetie,” she said. “You may be fooling everyone
else on this ship but not me.”

Liam pressed his palm to his chest and glared at

her. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,
Mrs. Brown.” For added effect, he batted his
eyelashes on purpose.

Her head went back and she laughed. She

slapped her own knee this time and said, “Sweetie,
I may be dumb as a country girl with some things,
but I’m not an idiot. I know a boy in a dress when I
see one. I had a cousin who used to dress up like a
girl all the time. The other boys used to beat the
shit out of him. That is until I beat the shit out of
them and told them if they ever touched him again,
I’d cut their balls off.”

Liam blinked. He wasn’t sure where she was

going with this.

“Don’t worry,” she said. “I’m not going to say a

word. It will be our little secret. I like you. I know
that bitch Oliver is married to. I never liked her,
and she’s always treated me like poor white trash
that wasn’t good enough for her. And if Oliver
prefers a cute young man who wears women’s
clothes, I couldn’t care less. I just wanted you to
know I’m on your side, sweetie. You can trust old
Maggie here.”

Liam took a deep breath and sighed. He glanced

across the table at Oliver and Oliver smiled at
him. Then he leaned over and asked, “How did
you know for sure?” He used his own voice this
time, speaking in a stage whisper. He figured there
was no need to pretend, and he knew he could trust
Maggie to keep his secret. If anything, she seemed
to be enjoying the fact that he was dressed as a
woman far more than she should have been.

“It was your look,” she said.
“My look?”
She laughed. “I’m not talking about the way you

look. You really do look like a beautiful, young
woman. I’m talking about the way you look at
Oliver. I spotted it at once. I saw the love in your
eyes each time you looked at him and each time he
looked at you. I’ve been in love myself.” She
glanced around the table at the other couples and
frowned. “I’m not like the rest of these fools here.
I can spot true love a mile away, sweetie. And the
way you’re looking at Oliver isn’t the way a
cousin is supposed to look at another cousin.”

This was the one thing Liam hadn’t considered.

But how could he help the way he looked at
Oliver? He was in love with him. He had to be
more careful from now on. “How did you know I
was a man?”

“I didn’t for sure,” she said. “I only suspected it.

I was bluffing. You just confirmed it.”

He sent her a sideways glance. “You’re terrible.

That wasn’t very nice to trick me that way. You
have no idea how terrified I am right now.” He
wasn’t really mad at her. He saw the way she was
smiling, and he knew he’d found a good friend.

“I’m just having fun with you,” she said. “Your

secret is safe with me, sweetie. I just want to know
every last detail from now on.”

He smiled and reached for her hand. He

squeezed it and said, “Thank you for being so
kind.”

Maggie shrugged. “When you’ve been kicked

around as many times as I have, and you know how
it feels to get kicked, you tend to spot other people
who are in the same position. You’ll be okay,
sweetie. Oliver’s a good man, and he’ll do right by
you. He’s one of the finest men I know, and it
breaks my heart that he is forced to sneak around
like this.”

After dinner, Maggie told everyone else at the

table that “Edwina” had a severe headache, and
she should go back to her suite with her cousin,
Oliver. The others were asking Oliver to go
dancing with them in the first-class ballroom and
Oliver seemed confused about what to do. Liam
didn’t want to go dancing. and he didn’t want to be
seen. Maggie must have sensed this, and she came
to his rescue. She sent Oliver a look and said,
“You should take her back to the suite, Oliver.”

When Oliver and Liam went back to their suite,

Oliver asked Liam what he’d talked about all
evening with Maggie. Liam sat Oliver down on the
end of the bed and then climbed up on his lap. He
pulled the red velvet gown all the way up his legs
to his waist. He spread his legs and rubbed his
bottom against Oliver’s thighs. Then he put his
arms around Oliver’s shoulders and looked him in
the eye. “I’d rather not talk about Maggie or
anyone else right now. I’d rather concentrate on
taking care of my man tonight.” He knew how
much Oliver loved it when he boosted his
manhood this way. This is one reason why they
were such a good match. Another man, who wasn’t
as secure with his own manhood as Liam, might
have been competitive with Oliver.

Oliver’s hands went down, and he slid them up

the back of Liam’s red gown. When he discovered
that Liam wasn’t wearing anything beneath the
corset, he squeezed Liam’s ass and said, “You’re
notorious. What would those good, religious
people at the dinner table have thought if they’d
known my sweet, innocent Edwina, my shy cousin,

wasn’t wearing anything beneath her gown but a
corset?”

Liam arched his back and started to grind his

hips slowly. The red velvet mules slipped off his
feet, and he rubbed the bottom of his ass on
Oliver’s lap. “I’m sure they would say that you’re
a very lucky man tonight. They might even get
jealous if they knew what I was going to do to you
in a minute.”

Oliver’s face grew serious. He slapped Liam on

the ass a couple of times, and then he turned fast
and threw him down on the bed. He pulled off his
own clothes and tossed them in every direction.
When he was naked, he yanked the red gown off
Liam’s back and heaved it across the room where
it stuck to the curtain rod and dangled.

Liam was only wearing the long corset now. He

gazed up at Oliver and said, “Aren’t you going to
take everything off?” He knew Oliver wasn’t going
to do this. He could see the excited glaze in
Oliver’s eyes; he heard his heavy breathing.

Oliver took a quick breath and climbed up on

the bed. He grabbed Liam’s arm with force and

turned him over on his stomach.

Liam spread his legs without having to be told.
When he did this, Oliver leaned forward, lifted

the back of the corset slightly, and spread Liam’s
ass apart. He spit on Liam’s hole; he spit on his
dick and rubbed it around the head. A second later,
he forced his way into Liam so hard, Liam’s head
went back and he yelped from the pain. He pulled
the blond wig off his head and he clenched his
fists, wishing he had a pillow to bite.

But it didn’t hurt for long. It never did with

Oliver. After a moment or two of discomfort,
Oliver was sliding in and out the same way he
always did. He pulled all the way out and then
plunged in deeply. His pelvis smacked into Liam’s
bottom and the bed covers lifted from the sides.
This time, Oliver fucked him so hard, Liam began
to climax without touching himself. He moaned
softly and said, “Yes, Oliver. Keep doing that.
Don’t stop.”

Oliver fucked him harder. “You like that?”
“Yes, please don’t stop.”
Oliver plunged in deeply, fell on top of him, and

wrapped his arms around his shoulders. He pulled
Liam up until he was on his hands and knees, with
his arms and legs spread. Liam’s ass was high in
the air now. Oliver stood at the side of the bed,
with his legs braced against the side of the
mattress, and started fucking him hard again. In this
position, with Oliver on his feet, the thrusts
became so strong, Oliver had to hold Liam by the
waist so he wouldn’t slide off the bed.

Each time Oliver entered him felt better than the

last. His climax finally grew to a point where he
couldn’t hold back a second longer. Without
moving his head, Liam said, “I’m ready, Oliver. I
can’t control it. Don’t stop. Faster, please.” The
way Oliver’s dick was rubbing against that deep,
dark place in his body was out of his control. And
he knew no matter what he tried to think about, he
wouldn’t be able to stop the explosion about to
happen.

Oliver never said a word. He just kept banging

into Liam’s body as hard as he could until Liam’s
jaw dropped and he started to grunt louder. They
came at the same time that night. And Liam never

had to reach between his legs once.

When it was over, Oliver fell on top of him and

remained inside. They were both dripping in
perspiration and too exhausted to move. They
wound up falling asleep in this position and didn’t
wake up for the next two hours.

Liam opened his eyes first and sighed with

delight. He liked waking up with Oliver on top of
him. He inhaled and caught a hint of the rugged,
masculine aroma coming from beneath Oliver’s
arms.

Oliver must have heard him sigh. He yawned

and stretched his legs. He held Liam tighter and
said, “Let’s go out for a walk under the stars and
take in the fresh air.”

There was nothing Liam wouldn’t have loved to

do more with the man in his life. But he was
worried people would see them and suspect
something. It would have been bad enough if
they’d found out Liam was really a man pretending
to be a woman. But if they spotted Oliver walking
around the ship with his young, virgin cousin, this
could be dangerous, too. “It will take too long to

get dressed. Let’s just go to bed. I’ll crawl under
the covers while you’re sleeping and do that thing
you like so much with my lips.” He knew how
much Oliver liked it when he took Oliver’s penis
into his mouth and sucked on the head with his
lips. Oliver said his wife had never done that to
him, not even when he begged her to do it. Liam
didn’t mind. He actually liked the taste of Oliver’s
dick. And he liked the taste of what came out of
Oliver’s dick even more.

“You can do that to me later,” Oliver said. “I

want to go out for a walk and get some fresh air.
No one will suspect anything. You can put on the
wig and the big fur hat with the fur coat. We’ll
look just like everyone else.”

Liam tried to talk him out of it a few more times.

But Oliver wouldn’t back down, so Liam climbed
out of bed and went to the dressing room. When he
returned to the bedroom, he was wearing a long fur
coat that came down to his feet, black velvet shoes
with two-inch heels, and he’d covered most of the
blond wig with a large fur hat that hid his entire
forehead.

Oliver had put his dinner clothes back on, and

he was standing near a window waiting for him.
When Liam walked into the bedroom, Oliver
turned around and smiled. “You look so good. I
can’t believe you dressed so fast, too. I was
expecting you to take at least an hour. My wife
usually takes two hours to get ready.”

Liam shrugged. He didn’t mention that he wasn’t

wearing anything under the fur coat but the black
heels. He figured no one would know, and he did
not intend to remove the coat. He smiled at Oliver
and said, “We just have to be careful we don’t
walk too close to each other. I don’t want anyone
getting any wrong ideas about you and young
cousin Edwina.”

Oliver nodded and said, “I agree.”
But when they were outside in the cold, fresh

air, Oliver had other ideas. When they rounded a
corner at the other end of the ship, toward the
stern, Oliver pulled Liam into a dark area beneath
a flight of stairs and wrapped his arms around him.
Liam tried to push him away, but it was no use. A
second later, when Oliver’s hand slid behind the

fur coat and he found out that Liam was buck
naked, he pinned him to the wall and started
kissing him.

The fur coat opened and Oliver ran his hands all

over Liam’s naked body. It felt so good to be
outside, practically naked, in the arms of the man
he loved, Liam almost let the coat slide off his
shoulders. But he stopped short just in time. He
knew if they were discovered beneath the stairs
this way, their lives would be ruined. So he
reached down, grabbed Oliver’s crotch, and said,
“Why don’t you let me suck you right now, here
under that stairs.” He knew this would bring
Oliver to a fast climax and calm him down. Then,
they could straighten themselves out and walk back
to their suite. If anyone noticed anything at all, it
might be that poor, delicate Edwina’s lips were
red and swollen.

Oliver was so excited, he unfastened his pants

and forced Liam to his knees. The fur coat was
still wide open, and it was hanging off Liam’s
shoulders. Liam kneeled down and sucked Oliver
into his mouth. He sucked harder and faster than he

usually did. He dug his fingernails into Oliver’s
thighs and took deep breaths through his nose. At
one point, to speed things up, Liam gripped the
shaft and jerked it while sucking just the head. In
less than ten minutes, Oliver grabbed Liam’s ears
and he exploded in his mouth. He came fast and hit
the back of Liam’s throat. Liam gulped him down
without gagging or choking. He didn’t lose a drop.
Oliver held Liam’s head in place for a minute or
two, forcing his dick all the way to the back of
Liam’s throat, until he had nothing left. Then, he
held him this way until he started to go flaccid
inside Liam’s mouth.

When Oliver finally released his hands from

Liam’s ears, Liam sucked out a few last drops to
make sure there was nothing left. Then he removed
Oliver’s cock from his mouth and gently placed it
back inside his pants. After he fastened Oliver’s
pants and patted his fly, Oliver helped him to his
feet and lifted the fur coat up over his shoulders so
he wouldn’t be cold.

“You are amazing,” Oliver said. “I’ve never

experienced anything like that before and not

outside in the open.” He kissed him on the lips and
put his arms around him. “That thing you do with
your lips and tongue is mesmerizing. You could do
that every single day to me for the rest of my life
and I’d never get tired of it.”

“We should go back now,” Liam said. He knew

how much men loved it when he sucked on them.
“We’re already taking a huge chance. I don’t want
to test our luck tonight. They’d throw us both
overboard if they knew what I just did to you.”
There were times when he realized the
hopelessness of his circumstances, a wave of
doom passed through his body.

Oliver helped him button up the fur coat. Then

he laughed and said, “You’re still young. Don’t
underestimate anyone or anything. I could point out
at least two dozen people I know on this ship who
do far more scandalous things than what we just
did. I know this for a fact. The older man at our
table tonight has been keeping a young mistress all
his life…and not the same young mistress either.
The older man’s wife has a mistress, too, though
it’s considered a guarded secret. He changes his

mistress out every two or three years for a new
one. It’s almost expected these days, as long as it’s
done discreetly and no one suffers from scandal.
The only difference between them and us is that
we’re madly in love with each other.”

For the first time since he’d boarded the Titanic,

Liam felt a wave of relief pass through his body.
The doomed feeling went away. “You’re right. I
never thought about it that way. And I do love you.
I love you more than life itself, Oliver.”

“And I love you even more.”

* * * *

For the next few days, Liam spent a great deal of

his time with Maggie when he wasn’t with Oliver.
Oliver went to play cards or chess; he often held
informal business meetings with other male
passengers. Liam decided it was safer not to be
alone. The few times he’d ventured out of the suite
on his own for fresh air, young men from the crew
gaped at him in ways that made him feel uneasy.
As a man, he wasn’t used to being treated in this
obvious way by other men and it caused a sinking

feeling in his stomach. One reason was because he
couldn’t react to these young men the way he
would have liked to react. He wanted to tell them
to knock it off and grow up. The other reason was
because he secretly liked the attention. This had
nothing to do with his feelings for Oliver. But deep
down, though he never would have admitted this to
anyone aloud, especially not Oliver, he found these
rough, young men attractive and would have taken
them on one by one if he hadn’t been in love with
Oliver. This caused a powerful sense of guilt and
self-doubt right down to the very core of his being.
So he decided not to leave his room without an
escort…ever.

Maggie was the perfect companion. Though he

found Maggie to be a bold, funny woman, the other
first-class passengers on the ship didn’t find her
quite as amusing. Most considered her crude and
often vulgar. Liam provided her with much-needed
companionship, too.

Each night after dinner, Liam and Oliver fell

into a set routine. After the first night, when Liam
blew Oliver outdoors beneath the staircase, Oliver

couldn’t seem to get enough of this open,
adventurous sex. The more scandalous it sounded,
the more he wanted. So after dinner, they would
quietly excuse themselves from the other
passengers and head back to their room. Oliver
made quiet excuses that his young cousin was
delicate and couldn’t take crowds for any length of
time. But the real reason was that Oliver couldn’t
wait to get Liam out of the dining room and rip off
his clothes. And they didn’t always make love in
the suite. Most nights, Oliver persuaded Liam to
remove all his clothes and just wear the fur coat,
and then they would stroll the ship searching for
dark, secret corners where Oliver could take Liam
in places that most people would have considered
far too dangerous.

Liam understood this element of danger seemed

to be more than half the fun for Oliver. Sometimes,
it was just a blowjob; sometimes Oliver fucked
him against the ship. The thrill of being on the
verge of getting caught made Oliver so hard, he
even came sooner than he normally did. And Liam
didn’t mind. He smiled when Oliver opened his

legs and mounted him while the cold ocean air
filled their lungs. Liam whispered and begged to
be spanked and fucked at the same time and Oliver
was only too happy to oblige.

On the night of April 14, they broke their routine

for the first time since they’d boarded the ship. It
was a Sunday night, and there was a hint of
invisible calm all over the ship. Though there was
no moon that night, the sky was clear and the ocean
so calm that it resembled a silvery sheet of glass.
The stars lit the sky with millions of little white
dots; there wasn’t a cloud in sight. The temperature
hovered around the freezing mark, and it didn’t
seem too cold, because there wasn’t much of a
breeze. At dinner, Liam and Oliver sat with
Maggie and a few of Oliver’s older American
friends once again. But for some reason, the mood
was lighter than it had been before. The others
even included Maggie and Liam in more than one
conversation at the dinner table, where they
usually dismissed them politely and left them to
converse alone.

Oliver was in an especially bright mood that

evening. He’d had a little more wine and then
champagne. He smiled more than usual, and he
kept lowering his hand and running it up between
Liam’s legs while everyone around them talked
and laughed.

That night, Oliver had insisted on sitting beside

his shy cousin, Edwina. Liam didn’t give it a
second thought until he felt Oliver’s big hand going
up his dress.

Liam wore a deep blue gown that night in a soft,

silky fabric, with deep blue two-inch heels to
match that had small rhinestones on the toes.
Maggie had helped him dress that night. She’d let
him borrow an expensive blue and silver plume
that she’d pinned to his blond wig. They’d laughed
so hard while she’d helped him get dressed for
dinner that night poor Maggie wound up bent over,
clutching her lower abdomen in his dressing room,
begging him to stop joking around. He truly knew
he’d found a good friend in this woman, and he
was looking forward to getting to know her better
when they docked in New York.

After dinner, Oliver suggested they remain with

the others for a while and go dancing. The first-
class entertainment on the ship was supposed to be
the best of its kind, and Oliver didn’t want to miss
all the fun. Though Liam believed this was
dangerous and refused at first, Oliver finally
persuaded him to stay out later that night and share
a few dances with him. Liam had never danced
with Oliver in public or in private before; he
wasn’t sure he’d get a chance to dance with him in
public ever again. Men like Liam and Oliver had
learned dancing and laughing in public would
never be part of their normal lives. They were two
men in love, and this wasn’t acceptable. So Liam
smiled and agreed to do whatever Oliver wanted
to do that night.

After they danced, they said goodnight to

Maggie and headed back to their suite. They
walked slowly, stopping to gaze out at the sea
every so often. They remained about a foot apart
but strolled and talked about the future. Oliver said
he would set Liam up in a hotel suite in New York
when they arrived in America. Then he would
begin divorce proceedings as quickly as possible.

In a year’s time, he was hoping he and Liam would
be living together in Oliver’s home in New York.
They would have to be discreet at all times, and
they couldn’t flaunt their relationship in public. But
at least they’d be free to do whatever they wanted
when they were alone. The general plan was for
Oliver to hire Liam for one of his businesses. This
way, they would eventually be able to be seen in
public often without creating too much suspense,
and Liam would have his own money. Liam would
have preferred to find his own job on his own
terms in New York. He wasn’t poor or stupid; he
had an excellent education. But he smiled and said
he was willing to wait for Oliver to figure out
everything on his terms. He said he would do
anything Oliver wanted, and he would wait twenty
years if that’s what it took to be with him.

When they reached the suite, it was a little after

eleven thirty at night. Oliver was still smiling and
talking about the future. He grabbed Liam by the
waist and threw him down on the bed. First, he
removed the silky deep blue dress. As Liam
stretched his arms and legs and arched his back,

Oliver’s head went down, and he started licking
the softest spots between Liam’s legs. He made an
attempt to lift the corset up higher so he could bury
his face between Liam’s legs, but when his hands
touched the hem, they both felt a rough knock that
rocked everything in the suite. A lamp fell
sideways; the fringe on the elaborate brocade
draperies jiggled and shook. Oliver looked up and
glanced around.

“What on earth was that?” Liam asked. He was

on his back, with his legs open. One deep blue
shoe hung over Oliver’s right forearm and dangled
haplessly.

Oliver shrugged. “I’m not sure. It felt as if the

ship hit something or an explosion.”

“Do you think we should go and find out what it

was?” Liam hadn’t sailed on a ship since he was a
child. He didn’t know what to expect.

Oliver caressed the inside of Liam’s upper thigh

and lowered his head. Before he buried his face
between Liam’s legs again, he smiled and said,
“Everything is fine. I’m sure it’s nothing to worry
about. This ship is unsinkable.”

A few minutes later, Oliver turned Liam over on

his stomach. He spanked him a few times and
laughed. While he unfastened his pants and yanked
his dick out, he told Liam to spread his legs. He
spit on his cock and then spit on Liam’s opening.
But just as Oliver mounted him and the head of
Oliver’s dick entered Liam’s body, they heard a
loud commotion outside the suite and didn’t know
what to make of it.

At first, they didn’t pay attention. Liam was just

getting past the pain and Oliver was inside as far
as he could go, moaning softly. But when they
heard people shouting and screaming, Oliver
pulled out and said, “I’d better go out there and see
what’s wrong. I’ll be right back.” He put his dick
back in his pants and walked to the door.

While he was gone, Liam remained in the suite,

waiting for him to return. He wanted to go out and
see what was wrong, but he didn’t want to go
alone as a woman and take the chance of having
someone discover his secret. To be safe, in case
there was something seriously wrong, he remained
in his wig and corset. If he had to leave the suite,

he wanted to be prepared to get ready as quickly
as possible.

Oliver returned to the suite sometime around

twelve thirty. He bolted through the door with his
eyebrows furrowed and his lips pinched so tightly,
it looked painful.

Liam had been pacing the room, waiting for

Oliver, hoping there was nothing seriously wrong.
The moment he turned and saw the expression on
Oliver’s face, he knew it wasn’t good news.

Oliver crossed to where he was standing and

grabbed Liam’s shoulders. He looked into Liam’s
eyes and said, “Listen to me very carefully. I don’t
want you to panic. We hit an iceberg, and they are
preparing to lower the lifeboats. I want you to put
on that fur coat and come with me immediately.
There’s no time to waste.”

Liam felt a rush of panic; his heart raced and his

face felt hot. He shook his head and said, “That’s
impossible. The Titanic is unsinkable. There must
be some mistake. I’m sure they are overreacting.”

Oliver held his shoulders tighter, and he shook

him gently. “Listen to me, my love. This isn’t a

mistake. I spoke with the captain myself. They are
taking women and children on the lifeboats first.
Then, they are taking the men. I want you on one of
those lifeboats as soon as possible.”

When the magnitude of all this hit Liam, he

jerked away from Oliver and said, “I’m getting out
of these clothes and I’m putting on men’s clothes.
There might be something I can do to help.”

“No,” Oliver said, “we can’t take that chance. If

they find out you’re a man, it will ruin everything
for us. You have to trust me and listen to me. I
know what I’m doing. I have to know you’re safe.”
He shook him harder this time. “Please tell me
you’ll do what I say. We have too much to lose if
you don’t.”

When Liam heard the panic in Oliver’s voice

and he saw the way his eyes bulged, he nodded
and said, “I trust you. Just tell me what you want.”

Oliver said there wasn’t time to get dressed. He

told him to put on the fur coat and hat and grab his
warmest gloves. A minute later, Oliver grabbed
him by the waist and led him out of the suite. As he
guided him to the other end of the ship, Liam saw

people running and screaming in all directions.
Women carrying small children ran past them, as if
running a race against time. Other men guided
clusters of women in the same direction Oliver and
Liam were headed. They didn’t speak. Oliver just
pushed him forward, and he didn’t resist.

When they reached the place where lifeboats

were being launched, Oliver pulled Liam aside, up
against the ship, so other people wouldn’t hear
them. He put his arms around him and held him
tightly for a moment, then he stepped back and
said, “I want you to wait right here for me. I’m
going to go see if I can help organize things.
Maybe I can get more information from one of the
wireless men. I’m sure they must have sent out
distress signals by now. If I’m not back in an hour
and you can get on a lifeboat, do it. Don’t wait for
me. I’ll join you later.”

Liam glanced around. “I’ve never seen so much

panic. There’s nothing you can do. Stay here with
me.” He didn’t want to be separated from Oliver.
The thought caused a pull in his stomach that made
him weak in the knees.

A man ran by and shouted, “There aren’t enough

lifeboats. We’re all going to die.” His voice went
up with a shrill; his arms and hands waved above
his head.

Oliver reached for Liam’s hands. He held them

gently and smiled. “I’ll be back. I promise. You
have to trust me. Stay here and wait for me.”

“I can’t let you leave,” Liam said. There were

tears streaming down his face. Panic tightened
every nerve in his body. He felt it well up from
deep down inside in a way he’d never experienced
it before. Part of him felt like jumping overboard
out of sheer frustration; another part of him wanted
to go with Oliver and see if he could help. “I want
to go with you. I want to help, too.”

“It’s too risky,” Oliver said. “If they find out

you’re a man instead of a woman, our lives will be
ruined. Just promise me you’ll wait here for me.”

Liam found this comment disconcerting at best.

If the ship went down and they both drowned, it
wouldn’t matter anyway. But he saw the panic in
his lover’s eyes, and he couldn’t make this worse
for him. So, he nodded and said, “I’ll wait. I

promise.”

Before he left, Oliver hugged him one last time.

Then he took off toward the other end of the ship
and Liam walked out into the middle of a crowd of
people. He lost track of where Oliver had gone
within seconds. Oliver disappeared into the crowd
without a backward glance. There were people
running and screaming; nothing made sense; all
order seemed to have vanished. It was difficult to
make out any one conversation, because everyone
was talking over everyone else. In the distance, he
heard a small band playing a religious song he
hadn’t heard since he was a child in America.

As they started to lower the lifeboats, women

and children gathered in clusters, waiting to climb
aboard. One of the rough, young men in the crew
who had flirted with Liam more than once passed
by, and Liam grabbed his arm. He stopped him
short and asked, “What’s going on? Is the ship
really sinking?”

The terrified young man gazed back at Liam and

spoke with a thick Irish brogue. “We’re going
down any minute now. You’d better get in a

lifeboat, missy.” Then he reached out and grabbed
Liam by the waist. “I’ll help you get on.”

“No,” Liam said. “I’m fine. I’m waiting for

someone.”

The young man shrugged and left Liam standing

there.

For a moment, Liam stood in silence staring at

the crowd. He didn’t feel it when someone came
from behind and knocked him over. He didn’t even
know he hit his head on the deck and someone
lifted him to safety. By the time he opened his
eyes, he was sitting back in a lifeboat surrounded
by crying children and sobbing women. His head
throbbed. He wasn’t certain how he’d arrived
there. For the first time since he’d left the suite, he
felt so cold, his fingers were numb.

As he sat up and glanced around, he realized the

men were preparing to lower the lifeboat into the
ocean. He glanced back and noticed that one
lifeboat in the process of being launched only had
half the amount of people it could have held. Panic
seemed to have gripped the entire ship; no one
knew what he or she was doing. Then he heard a

familiar voice from the other end of the lifeboat.
He turned and looked forward, locking eyes with
Maggie Brown. She had her arms around a young
woman who was holding an infant.

When Maggie saw Liam in the lifeboat, she sat

up fast, removed her arms from the young woman,
and pointed. “Hey, you’re no lady.”

Liam stood up and pointed at her. “I don’t know

how I got here. The last thing I remember was
falling on deck.” He slowly started to remember
the vague image of the young crewmember lifting
him off the deck and placing him in the lifeboat.
But he wasn’t certain; he could have been
imagining this.

The other people in the lifeboat were too panic-

stricken to notice what was happening between
Maggie and Liam. They didn’t even notice Liam’s
male voice come from a young woman in a fur coat
and hat. Some had left their rooms in such a state
of panic, they weren’t even wearing coats, hats, or
gloves. Others were still in their nightclothes and
stocking feet.

Maggie made her way to where Liam was and

put her arms around him. “I’m so glad to see you
got here with me. Don’t tell anyone, but I’ve never
been so frightened in my bloody life.”

Liam hugged her fast and said, “I’m not

supposed to be here. I don’t know how I even got
onto this lifeboat. I was supposed to wait for
Oliver on the ship. I’m not going anywhere without
him.”

“Don’t worry, sweetie,” Maggie said. “He’ll be

on another lifeboat. You find him later. You’re
safe now, and that’s all that matters. We’re going
to be fine.”

“But there aren’t enough lifeboats on the ship,”

Liam said. He remembered this distinctly. “That’s
why they are only letting women and children on
first. They don’t know if there will be enough
room for any men.”

“How could that happen?” Maggie said. “For

what I paid for first class on this tug boat, there
should at least be enough lifeboats for everyone.”

“I don’t know,” Liam said. There wasn’t time to

discuss it either. He knew they were going to
lower the lifeboat at any moment. “But I’m not

leaving Oliver alone. And I’m not going back to
America without my dignity. It’s the only thing I’ve
ever had that was worth anything.” He removed the
fur hat and the blond wig and tossed them to the
floor of the lifeboat. He didn’t care who saw him
do this; a sense of relief passed through his body.

An older woman who had accidentally glanced

in his direction, blinked when she saw him
standing there with a man’s haircut. She’d been
one of the women sitting at his dinner table all
week.

Maggie said, “What are you doing?”
“I’m going back to look for Oliver before they

lower the boat, as a man this time, not as a
woman.”

Maggie tried to stop him, but he wouldn’t listen.

After he removed the hat and the wig, he pulled the
fur coat off and handed it to a woman who was
wearing nothing but a thin nightgown. As he stood
there, in nothing but a long corset and deep blue
heels, Maggie covered her mouth with both hands
and gaped.

He pulled the corset lower, hugged her again,

and said, “Please be safe. You’ve been a
wonderful friend. I hope I see you again soon. But
if I don’t, thank you for being so kind to us. You’ll
never know what you’ve done for me and for
Oliver. Men like us don’t meet people like you
often.” At least the corset was long enough to
cover his private parts.

Maggie wasn’t a stupid woman. She also wasn’t

the type to gloss over reality and pretend nothing
was wrong. She held him tightly and said, “You’re
a good man. If I were you, I’d be doing the same
thing. I’ll never forget you as long as I live. I hope
and pray we meet again. If we don’t, God be with
you.”

While Liam tried to climb off the lifeboat so he

could find Oliver on the ship, he met more than his
share of resistance. It was as if once you were on
there, they wouldn’t let you leave. But he pushed
and shoved, refusing to remain. Men were jumping
off the sides of the ship into the water on both
sides; the ship was beginning to tilt; the bow was
sinking faster and the lifeboat Liam was in was
already filled beyond its capacity. He finally

grabbed one of the ropes and climbed back onto
the ship just as they began to lower the lifeboat
into the water.

A few people flung him horrified, confused

glances when they saw he was a young man
wearing a corset and two-inch heels. But no one
bothered to stare at him for long. They were all far
too busy trying to figure out what they were going
to do next.

He ran back to where he’d left Oliver and didn’t

find him there. The band was playing that new
s o n g , America the Beautiful, somewhere in
another part of the ship, and he felt a tug in his
heart when he realized he might never see America
again. He hadn’t thought about this until now. But
there wasn’t time to stand there and ponder. He
had to find Oliver before it was too late, and then
they had to find out if they could get into a lifeboat
when all the women and children were safely
boarded.

As he ran up a flight up stairs to a higher part of

the ship, he saw more men jumping overboard. A
few were so drunk by then, they were falling

around him. One man was on his knees, holding
rosary beads, staring down and mumbling prayers.
When Liam reached the next level, he saw one man
shove a gun into his mouth and pull the trigger.
Liam almost stopped and vomited. He felt light-
headed and dizzy. For a split second, he even
thought about taking the dead man’s coat so he
could cover up the corset he was wearing. But that
would have been too much for him to handle. And
the corset didn’t seem to matter much anymore; no
one gave him a second glance. The only thing that
kept going through his head was this couldn’t
actually be happening. This couldn’t be real. And
yet he knew it was real. He had to find Oliver. He
had to get to him before it was too late.

He searched for what seemed like hours, but

couldn’t have been more than minutes. He finally
found Oliver next to a stairwell.

He was bent over, trying to help an older man

up to a standing position. The older man seemed to
be resisting him, as if he didn’t want to move.

Liam grabbed Oliver’s arm and said, “We have

to go. We have to see if there is room for us on any

of the lifeboats.”

Oliver turned fast. He released the older man’s

arm, and the older man sank back without looking
up at either of them. “What are you doing here? I
told you to wait for me. You should have been on a
lifeboat by now. They would have thought you
were a woman.”

“I couldn’t leave that way,” Liam said. “It

would have been wrong. And I couldn’t leave you
that way either. I had to find you. We have to go
now. There might still be time.”

As Oliver took Liam in his arms, the stern of the

ship began to rise from the ice-cold Atlantic.
Oliver kissed him and took his hand. “We have to
run toward the stern,” he said. “It might be safer
there.”

Though people were still screaming and others

were still jumping overboard to see if they could
jump onto a lifeboat…or at least hang on to the
side of one…Liam felt an unusual sense of calm
pass through his entire body. He’d always
wondered how he would react in a life-or-death
situation. He’d always wondered if the body

would be kind and he would feel any agonizing
pain. Standing there with the love of his life,
Oliver, quelled all his fears. He looked into
Oliver’s eyes and said, “It’s too late, my love; just
hold me.”

The stern went higher and the ship tilted even

more. The screaming stopped abruptly and a
peculiar quiet overtook the entire ship. The only
sound that could be heard was the orchestra still
playing somewhere in the distance.

Oliver pulled Liam closer, and he wedged their

bodies into a corner next to a stairwell. He put his
arms around Liam and kissed him so hard, the ship
seemed to tilt even more.

A moment later, while they were still locked in

this firm embrace, the music stopped and the entire
world seemed to tilt sideways. Liam knew the ship
was about to plunge into the ocean and there was
nothing anyone could do about it. He rested his
head against Oliver’s chest and listened for his
lover’s heartbeat. He closed his eyes and took a
quick breath. He heard Oliver do the same thing.
For a moment, as Liam felt the ship moving

downward, he thought he heard Oliver’s heartbeat.
It was faint and slow; it made his own heart beat
slower, and he smiled. He didn’t feel cold
anymore; his head stopped throbbing and he felt no
pain. It could have been the warmth from Oliver’s
strong body, or it could have been he knew in his
heart he would never again be separated from the
man he loved.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Ryan Field is a fiction writer who has worked in
many areas of publishing for the past 20 years.

He is the author of the best selling "Virgin
Billionaire" series, the best selling short story, "A
Regular Bud," and over fifty other works of
fiction. He has a long list of publishing credits that
include LGBT fiction with his own name and
mainstream fiction with several pen names.

You can read more about him here:

www.ryan-field.blogspot.com

OTHER LYD TITLES BY RYAN

FIELD

Young Doughy Joey

"Whatever, Dude"

Capping The Season

Vance's Flames

Down The Basement

Pumpkin Ravioli Boy

A Regular Bud

Strawberries and Cream at the Plaza

Kevin Love’s Cowboys

Missing Jackson’s Hole

Sir, Yes Sir

Down the Basement II: Santa Saturday

Dirty Little Virgin

Billabong Bang

Jolly Roger

You missed A Spot Big Guy

Skater Boy

Babycakes

Another Regular Bud

Bury It Officer

A Young Widow’s Promise

The Computer Tutor

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