Ryan Field The Virgin Billionaire's 2 Wedding

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The Virgin Billionaire's Wedding

by Ryan Field

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Ravenous Romance

www.ravenousromance.com

Copyright ©2010 by Ryan Field

First published in 2010

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CONTENTS

Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen

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The Virgin Billionaire's Wedding

A Ravenous RomanceTM Original Publication

Ryan Field

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A Ravenous RomanceTM Original Publication

www.ravenousromance.com

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Copyright (C) 2010 by Ryan Field
Ravenous RomanceTM
100 Cummings Center
Suite 123A
Beverly, MA 01915
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be

reproduced in whole or in part without written permission
from the publisher, except by reviewers who may quote brief
excerpts in connection with a review.

ISBN-13: 978-1-60777-363-4
This book is a work of fiction, and any resemblance to

persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

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Chapter One

On the evening before Luis and Jase left New York for

Alaska, Luis sat back against the sofa and sighed. He glanced
at the Manhattan skyline from their apartment in Trump
Tower and took such a deep, sudden breath his dog jumped.
The dramatic wall of windows ran floor to ceiling; the dark,
Brazilian hardwood floors gleamed in the subtle twilight. He
cleared his throat and rubbed his jaw. Then he ran his palm
across his little dog's bald, bony spine and exhaled. It was
hard to believe it had been almost eleven months since Luis
had tossed the dog out of the taxi on that cold, rainy
afternoon in early September.

The Chinese Crested looked up and sent Luis a blank stare.

He tilted his head and yawned. He usually slept on the zebra-
print loveseat from Luis's old apartment on the Upper West
Side, the only thing Luis had brought with him when he'd
moved into Jase's apartment.

Luis had finally named the dog Camp, partly because of his

bald body and the exaggerated long blond mop on his head,
and partly because he was much stronger than he appeared
to be. Camp often reminded Luis of a few drag queens he'd
known in his time. Though they looked outrageous and
appeared fragile, they were the strongest souls he'd ever
known.

Jase was in the bedroom they now shared together. He

was packing his bags for the trip. As he moved from the
closet to the line of suitcases sprawled across the bed, he

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whistled a tuneless song. They were traveling to Jase's
hometown in Alaska early the next morning, a small village
Luis had never heard of, not far from Wasilla and Palmer.
Jase hadn't been home in almost eleven months and Luis had
never even been to Alaska. Jase's parents were celebrating
their fortieth anniversary. And if this wasn't enough, his
grandmother was turning ninety. So they were planning a
huge combined celebration. Jase thought this would be the
perfect time to introduce Luis to his family and to announce
their wedding plans.

Even though they were only going for a few days, Luis

wasn't so sure about all this. The only information Jase's
family knew about Luis was what they'd read in the tabloids
and what Jase had told them over the phone. Though Jase's
attorneys had cleared Luis's name from that messy situation
with Derrick Stutsman and the narcotic ring Luis had
innocently been involved with, he wouldn't have chosen this
sort of publicity if he'd been given a choice. But Jase was the
famous Virgin Billionaire and there hadn't been a choice. And
when the press discovered Jase was not only involved with
someone connected to an illegal drug ring, but that he'd also
decided to come out of the closet and publicly announce he
was gay, they couldn't wait to print the news. The story about
Derrick and the drug ring finally died down, but there was still
the matter of Jase, the Virgin Billionaire, being gay and
having a permanent lover named Luis Fortune.

Though Jase had explained everything to his family in

detail in the months that followed, the press had portrayed
Luis as flighty, ditzy, and carefree in an unstable way. Luis

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couldn't help wondering what Jase's family thought of him.
How was Luis to know Derrick had been passing illegal drugs
with Luis's used underwear and sweat socks? He'd thought
Derrick had a harmless little underwear fetish. How could Luis
have known Derrick was almost flat broke and he hadn't sold
any real estate in ages? He'd seemed like such a nice,
genuine older man. He'd always praised Luis's happy-go-
lucky, casual sense of style, his short dark hair, and his tight
muscular body. And Derrick had never once asked for sex;
he'd always been the perfect gentleman. Oh, Luis had learned
his lesson that time. Very few people in this world are actually
the way they appear to be.

And now Luis had to convince Jase's family he wasn't a

drug dealer, he wasn't after Jase's money, and he truly loved
Jase, for richer or poorer. He had to go to Alaska and show
them he wasn't just one of the circuit boys, flitting from one
gay bar to the next without a care in the world, wondering
what new shirt to wear on Saturday night or which jeans to
wear to tea dance on Sunday afternoon. Jase spoke with his
mother and his grandmother once or twice a week, giving
them little details about Luis and telling them how happy he
was. But Jase never spoke with his father. And Jase never put
Luis on the phone with anyone. He told Luis this was all a
shock to his family and he wanted them to get used to the
idea he was gay, he'd fallen in love with someone special, and
he was planning to marry a man instead of a woman.

After a ten-month engagement, Jase finally told Luis it was

time to go to Alaska and meet everyone in person.

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Luis looked down at his laptop and smiled. He'd just

written a post about his impending trip to Alaska to meet
Jase's family for the first time and someone had already left a
nice encouraging comment wishing him well. In the past year,
Luis's life had changed in more ways than he ever could have
portended. He'd been lucky enough to secure several good
modeling jobs on his own, and he'd worked out an
arrangement to be Elena's exclusive guest blogger on his
favorite website, Elena's Romantic Treasures and Tidbits. He
posted about his life and about his relationship with Jase.
Though Luis and Jase kept their private lives very low profile,
refusing interviews with some of the most prominent
journalists in the world, there were millions of lgbt people
around the world who seemed interested in them as a same-
sex couple. When it occurred to Luis he could blog about his
wonderful relationship with Jase on his own terms and in his
own words, and help other same-sex couples by doing it, he
asked Elena if he could do it on her blog instead of starting
one of his own.

This was important to Luis. He had seen and read about

too many high-profile same-sex couples on TV, in film, in
books, and throughout the mainstream media, who sent out
mixed messages to the world. They were loud, often
aggressive, and rarely represented what most same sex
couples were about. Some were offensive; others absurd. To
people who didn't know anything about same-sex couples,
these high-profile couples usually portrayed in the
mainstream media were entertaining in the same way a
sideshow at the circus draws attention. The only reason these

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same-sex couples had voices was because they were so
extreme and the press always knew just how to bait them.
Luis thought it was high time an ordinary gay relationship like
the one he shared with Jase had a voice, too. His singular
goal was to show the world same-sex couples were just like
everyone else.

When Luis began writing about his relationship and his life

with Jase, he wondered if anyone would read his posts. He
thought they might be too dull and ordinary. But he was
inundated with e-mails from other same sex-couples, men
and women, thanking him for what he was doing. They were
the couples who didn't fit into the gay stereotypes either.
They praised him for working so hard on his honest blog
posts. One gay man from the Midwest who had been with his
partner for almost fifty years even wrote, "For the first time in
my life, I don't feel as though I'm being misrepresented by
fakes who are only interested in worshipping Martha Stewart,
signing autographs in front of Bloomingdales, and getting
attention to promote their own personal agenda. Thank you
so much!"

While Luis closed his laptop and set it on the thick glass

coffee table, Jase crossed into the living room and smiled.
"What's wrong?" he asked. "You look upset."

Luis lifted his head and sent him a warm glance. Jase was

walking around in his underwear, filled with so much life and
energy, smiling more than he had in the past ten months.
Luis couldn't let him know how terrified he was of meeting his
family for the first time. He couldn't let him know his stomach

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was twisted in knots. "I'm good," he said. "I'm just a little
tired."

Jase raised an eyebrow and said, "Don't lie to me. I know

you're worried about tomorrow. It's going to be okay. It
might be awkward at first. But my mother and my
grandmother are both excited about meeting you. I've been
telling them how wonderful you are for the past ten months."

"I just wish we'd keep our engagement a secret," Luis

said. "They've probably never heard of any same-sex couples
actually being engaged. I don't even know if there is such a
thing."

Jase frowned and crossed to where he was sitting. He sat

down and put his arm around him. "I don't really care
whether or not there are other same sex-couples who are
engaged. Besides, I'm sure there are plenty of them we
haven't heard about. I believe in the concept of marriage and
I believe in all the traditions that go along with marriage. I
don't take this lightly, and I'm not going to settle for less. I
spent my entire life settling because I was afraid of what
people would think. Now I don't give a damn. I've worked
hard. I have more money than God now. I'll do what I damn
well please." He lifted Luis's hand and kissed the large,
square diamond on the platinum engagement ring he'd given
him. "You're my fiance, I'm proud of it, and I want my family
to know it."

"Can we announce it in private, with just your immediate

family around?"

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Jase smiled. "Of course. I don't want to put you on the

spot. It's just going to be my mother, my father, and my
grandmother. We are very quiet people."

Luis smiled and moved closer. Jase was wearing white

cotton boxer shorts and black dress socks. The natural,
masculine definition of Jase's hard, sinewy body always made
his heart race. Luis tilted into Jase's strong, bare chest and
said, "I'm proud that you're my fiance, too. I'm proud of us as
a couple. But the rest of the world seems a little shocked. So
when we get to Alaska tomorrow, I'd like to play things down
a little. I don't want to throw all this in everyone's face all at
once, especially your father. I'll be really quiet and remain
subdued."

"I agree," Jase said. "I promise. I'll be as subtle as

possible."

"And our wedding plans will remain the same?" Luis asked.

They'd agreed to have a small private ceremony at
Christmastime. Though same-sex marriage wasn't legally
recognized on a federal level, they were going to take their
vows anyway. The plan was to go to a little bed-and-
breakfast in Vermont for the holidays and take their vows
with a few close friends.

Jase nodded and rubbed Luis's thigh. "I swear. We'll keep

it small. No more than five or six hundred people."

Luis's jaw dropped. "Tell me you're joking." He could never

be certain with Jase. Jase tended to do everything in excess,
which included the huge square diamonds on their
engagement rings. Luis would have been happy with a small
chip, or just a thin band. "We agreed to keep it small and

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make the announcement after we were married. I don't want
this turning into circus, Jase. I don't want the tabloids going
after us and making us look like fools." Mercifully, they didn't
get the attention Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie received from
the press, but one magazine had already combined their
names to Jais.

Jase's hand slid up his thigh and he laughed. "I'm just

joking. We'll keep it small. We'll go to Vermont with Ben and
Percy and the dogs just like we've been planning and have a
small private ceremony."

Luis smiled and rested his head beneath Jase's shoulder.

Ben and Percy were their two best friends. They were the
couple who had been together forty years who had been
walking in Riverside Park the night the cops had arrested
Luis. Ben had been walking the big poodle; Percy had been
carrying the grocery bag. Luis had run into them again by
accident several times and he'd found they had a lot in
common. And though there was a huge age difference—Ben
and Percy were each in their seventies—the four of them had
formed a strong friendship and spent a great deal of time
together. In many ways, this older couple had become their
mentors.

"What do you want for dinner?" Jase asked. "I'm starved."
Luis reached down and slipped his hand into the opening of

Jase's boxer shorts. He grabbed Jase and said, "I want this."
He stroked the shaft. "I feel like something thick and meaty,
with a unique flavor that can't be reproduced anywhere."
Then he pulled Jase's dick out of his boxer shorts and gently
licked the head with the tip of his tongue.

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Jase sat back and spread his legs. "You're a bad boy," he

said. "I was talking about real food, not this." He bucked his
hips forward a few times and pushed his crotch into Luis'
face.

"This is real food," Luis said, stroking faster. "And I'm

starved. Too bad you can't taste your own dick. You'd know
what I mean." Then he lowered his head, opened his mouth,
and wrapped his lips around the head. He was fully erect by
now.

"Aren't you going to take off your clothes?" Jase asked. His

voice was low, and his right knee jerked because Luis was
sucking so gently. His lips barely touched Jase's skin, and this
seemed to stimulate his most sensitive nerves.

For a second, Luis's head went up and he said, "Just sit

back and close your eyes." Then he puckered his lips and
went down on Jase with more force.

Though Jase wasn't fond of sucking dick, Luis knew how

much Jase loved getting his dick sucked. In the past ten
months, they'd spent entire days in bed exploring and
pleasuring each other with foreplay that always led to
dramatic climaxes. They'd both been tested for HIV, and
when both tests had returned negative, they'd stopped using
condoms. Now that they were a monogamous couple engaged
to be married just like any other straight couple, they didn't
need condoms. But the most memorable sex they'd shared,
as far as Luis was concerned, was when he'd surprised Jase in
unusual locations and sucked him off without expecting any
reciprocation. Luis had sucked him off in elevators, in cabs,
and in dark alleys. He'd even sucked Jase off in the men's

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room of an exclusive restaurant once when they were dining
with Ben and Percy. Now that it occurred to Luis he hadn't
done this in a while, he decided to make up for it.

Without removing his lips from Jase's cock, he went down

to the floor and kneeled between Jase's legs. He set his left
hand on Jase's thigh for support and reached into Jase's
shorts with his right and pulled out Jase's balls. While he
sucked, he squeezed his balls with light tugs. He knew how
much Jase loved gentle blow jobs. His head went up and
down, from the base of the shaft to the tip. His cheeks
indented and his lips protruded in an exaggerated, almost
sloppy, way.

While Luis sucked, Jase spread his legs wider and bucked

his hips into Luis's mouth. Jase bit his bottom lip and grabbed
the back of Luis's head, helping him maintain an even
rhythm. Luis's head started moving so fast the dog jumped
off the sofa and ran into the bedroom to hide. When Luis gave
Jase head, he didn't just go through the motions without a
goal in mind. He sucked as if he were trying to draw the filling
out of stuffed doughnut; he wanted every last drop Jase had
to offer.

But when Jase began to swell and Luis started to taste pre-

come, Jase grabbed the top of his head and said, "Stop. Take
off your pants and spread your legs."

Luis's eyes went up. He stopped sucking and said, "But

you're so close. I don't want to ruin it."

Jase ignored him. His face was red and there were beads

of perspiration rolling down the sides of his face. "Take off
your clothes and get down on your side."

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Without wasting a second, Luis stood up, pulled off all his

clothes, and sat on the black leather sofa. When he was
stretched out, resting on his right side, Jase lifted his left leg
and reached for a small tube of lubricant that had been
concealed in a leather box on the coffee table. They kept little
tubes of lube all over the house just in case. Luis thought it
was much easier than running into the bathroom medicine
closet, because he never knew when or where Jase would get
the urge to fuck him. They could be watching a movie on TV
and Jase would reach over and slide his hand up Luis's leg
and give him a look that meant he wanted to fuck. He'd
fucked Luis in the kitchen, out on the terrace, and up against
the clothes dryer. In ten months, they'd fucked in every
square foot of the apartment.

When Luis was greased and ready, Jase lifted his left leg

higher and moved forward. He entered Luis with a quick push
and started bucking his hips at once. By that time, Luis had
learned to accommodate Jase without the slightest hint of
pain or discomfort. Jase could slip into his body and start
pounding away as fast as he wanted or as long as he wanted
without having to worry. Luis didn't really have much of a
choice. He'd be sleeping soundly, and in the middle of the
night Jase would roll him over, mount him, and start fucking.
Luis certainly wasn't going to complain.

But that afternoon it only took four or five minutes for Jase

to start grunting and moaning. "I'm close. I'm about to go
off."

Luis started jacking his own dick. "I'm ready," he said. For

some reason, this was Luis's favorite position. When he was

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on his side and his legs were spread as wide as they'd go, his
own climax seemed more intense.

Jase grunted. He gave Luis five hard slams and tossed his

head back. "Here. It. Comes."

Oh, this was always the part Luis love the most. While Jase

filled Luis's body, Luis tugged his own cock twice and shot his
load across the sofa. It landed on the glass coffee table next
to his favorite book on interior design by the famous Billy
Baldwin. His chest heaved; post-climactic vibrations charged
through his body and he smiled so wide his face hurt. With
Jase, he always felt his orgasm in every cell of his body.

Jase remained inside for a minute or two, bucking his hips

and depositing the last few drops of come. Then he leaned
forward, wrapped his arms around Luis, and kissed him on
the lips. When he shoved his tongue into Luis's mouth, Luis's
stomach jumped. His eyelids fluttered and his toes curled
forward. It felt as though his entire body were about to melt
into the black leather sofa. If Jase had said, "One more time,"
Luis would have lifted his leg higher and replied, "Go for it."

But it wasn't going to happen that night. Jase's body went

up and pulled his dick out slowly. He lowered Luis's left leg
and helped him sit up on the sofa. "Now I'm really starved,"
Jase said, shoving his genitals back into his shorts.

Luis tightened his sphincter muscle and smiled. "Let me go

clean up and we can order Chinese."

"Let's order now," Jase said. "I'm starved. You can clean

up later. Let's eat first."

Luis laughed. There were still certain things about being

gay Jase didn't understand. "I really have to go clean up," he

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said. "I can't wait. There are things I have to do. All you have
to do is put your dick back into your boxer shorts and it's
over. But I have to take care of things in the bathroom."

Jase tilted his head to the side and he gave him a curious

look. "What things?"

There was no way Luis was going to go into detail about

post-fucking hygiene. So he smiled and stood up from the
sofa. Jase's come had already begun to drip down the insides
of his legs and he wanted to jump into the shower before it
reached his ankles. "You'll find out when I fuck you
someday," he said.

Jase blinked. In this respect, Jase was still a virgin. Though

he'd fucked Luis more times than they could ever count, Luis
had never actually fucked him. Luis had tried to get inside
him a few times, but Jase had always refused. And because
Luis preferred to be on the bottom, he'd never complained.
But he liked to tease Jase about getting fucked just to see his
horrified expression.

"I'll order you that chicken entree you always get," Jase

said, changing the subject. He stood and smoothed out his
boxer shorts. "I'll get the menu in the kitchen while you're in
the shower."

Luis smiled and grabbed Jase's ass. He laughed and said,

"You're changing the subject again. If you don't want to get
fucked, it's fine. I won't force you. I'm perfectly fine with
being the bottom. It's no big thing for me."

Jase pressed his lips together and inhaled through his

nostrils. "I'm just not sure," he said. "It just looks so painful."
He shrugged and spread his arms. "I can't even imagine how

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you do it. I always feel so guilty when I go inside. Like I'm
hurting you."

Luis grabbed his clothes from the floor and started walking

toward the bedroom. "Trust me," he said. "There's nothing
painful about it, so don't ever feel guilty. And I promise I'll be
very gentle with you. By the time I break you in, you won't
even know I'm inside you." He wasn't serious. He didn't care
one way or the other. But he loved teasing him about it.

Jase flashed him an adorable smile. "When we get back

from Alaska, I'll give it a try," he said. He always did this. He
always put it off for another time.

"It might be fun to try it while we're there," Luis said.

"Wouldn't it be fun to lose your virginity in your own
hometown?" Then he turned fast and headed toward the
bedroom. He didn't want Jase to see the huge smile he
couldn't control.

"You're having fun with this, aren't you?" Jase asked.
He had to shout; he was in the bedroom by then and

Jase's come was trickling down his ankles. "No pressure,
baby. Whenever you're ready, just let me know. I'll fuck your
brains out." Then he closed the bathroom door and turned on
the shower before Jase had a chance to answer him.

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Two

Early the next morning, they boarded a commercial flight

from New York to Anchorage, Alaska. Jase had a way of
unconsciously guiding Luis all the way through the airport,
during the security checks, and right onto the plane. Without
thinking, he'd place his palm on the small of Luis's back and
nudge him forward. Or he'd tug Luis's sleeve and guide him in
a certain direction. He always made Luis walk through a
doorway first and he often opened car doors for him. When
they finally reached their first-class seats at the front of the
plane, Jase even stepped to the side, placed his palm on
Luis's back and guided him to the window seat. Though Luis
would have preferred an aisle seat, he allowed Jase to take
complete control. It was an unspoken dynamic in their
relationship that seemed to work well without either of them
trying too hard.

Luis had learned one thing early: When someone is with a

man as strong and determined as Jase Nicholas, that
someone has to learn how to deal with their own ego. In any
relationship that's going to last for the long haul, compromise
is a huge ingredient. He'd learned to back down and allow
Jase control when it was necessary. But more than that, he'd
learned how to do this without compromising his own
personality. When Luis felt strongly about something, he
wasn't shy about letting Jase know it.

But his heart was pounding and his palms were sweating

that morning. And this was because Luis wasn't a frequent

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flier. He loathed planes and truly believed if God had intended
human beings to fly they would have been born with wings.
The only thing keeping him calm and even was knowing Jase
was there with him.

When Luis sat down, he placed a small Louis Vuitton pet

carrier on his lap and unzipped the top. He looked inside and
said, "Here we go, Camp," with a cheery tone. Then he
buckled his seat belt, slid to the right, and placed the pet
carrier on part of his seat so Camp could be right next to him
throughout the flight. The gray leather seats in first class
were wider than most; Luis was thin and there was plenty of
room for the pet carrier.

Jase plopped into his seat and buckled his seatbelt. He

adjusted his feet and asked, "You okay?" He'd been unusually
quiet that morning, rubbing his eyes and yawning most of the
time. But now that he was on the plane, he seemed more
animated.

"I'm good," Luis said. "I think Camp is okay, too. This is

the first time he's ever flown." He'd thought about leaving
Camp with Ben and Percy. Camp loved their huge standard
poodle, and Ben and Percy had offered to pet sit. But Luis
hated leaving Camp behind. And when Jase said his family
loved pets, Luis decided to bring him along. The flashy Louis
Vuitton pet carrier had been Jase's idea. Luis would have
gone to a pet store and picked out any old pet carrier. But
Jase had offered to pick one up on his way home from his
downtown office to save Luis the trip and he'd come home
with this pretentious Louis Vuitton affair.

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Jase smiled. He looked around to see if anyone was

watching, then placed his palm on Luis's knee. "He'll love it
once the plane is in the air. Take off might hurt his ears,
though. But I've traveled with dogs before and they've always
been fine."

Luis smiled and glanced down at the large hand on his

knee. Then he tilted his head and asked, "What are you
doing?"

Jase leaned closer and forced his eyebrows to move up

and down fast. He lowered his voice to a stage whisper and
said, "I thought we could have a little fun to pass the time
once we're in the air." Then he did the eyebrow thing again
and said, "You could blow me in the rest room. Or I could
cover my waist right here, pull my cock out, and you could
give me a hand job in front of everyone."

Luis blinked and jerked his knee away from Jase's hand.

"Well, you can keep dreaming about it, because you're not
going to have sex on this plane. I'm just too nervous to think
about anything other than meeting your family and getting
through this trip."

"It's going to be fine," Jase said. "They'll love you."
"Do I look okay?" Luis asked. He'd worn his most

conservative outfit that day: a plain white polo shirt, an olive
green twill jacket, and casual beige slacks. He would have
worn something plaid; he'd heard people in Alaska wore plaid
shirts and baseball caps all the time. But he didn't own
anything plaid and he hated hats, and by the time this
occurred to him it was too late to go shopping.

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"You look fine," Jase said, staring down at Luis's lap. "You

look so good I'd like to rip your pants off right now and bite
the backs of your legs."

Luis sighed and sat back. He pressed his lips together and

shook his head slowly. "Not going to happen. I'll make it up
later. But right now I just want to concentrate on getting to
Alaska in one piece."

Jase sighed. "I guess I'll just take a nap, since you're not

interested in any fun." Then he pouted and rested his head
against the seat.

Luis laced his fingers on his lap and sighed again. This

whole trip to Alaska was so laborious it had worn him out
before they'd even left New York. Some things were so much
easier for gay men like Jase than they were for gay men like
Luis. With Jase's rugged, masculine looks and his strong, solid
features, he always looked the same no matter what he wore.
But with Luis's gentle, pretty-boy features and his almond-
shaped green eyes he had to be more careful. Gay men like
Luis were conscious about what they wore for a reason. If
Luis wore something too dramatic or too trendy, he came off
looking like a gay cliche. If his shoes were too pointy or the
heels were too high, he looked effeminate. And though he
normally didn't care what anyone thought when he was in the
city, now that he was going to Alaska to meet Jase's family he
wanted to look just like any other normal young Alaskan man
in his twenties.

When they were in the sky, about halfway there, Luis

poked Jase in the ribs and asked him to tell him all about his

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family. Jase had already explained everyone, in detail, but
Luis wanted to hear it just one more time before they landed.

"I was sleeping," Jase said. "You woke me up."
Luis gripped his arm. "I'm sorry. Please, just one more

time. It's really important. I don't want to screw up any
names."

Jase smiled and said, "Okay, one more time. The two most

important people you have to worry about are my mother and
father, Barry and Mary Nicholas. They are celebrating their
fortieth wedding anniversary this weekend. My grandmother,
Isabelle Nicholas, is celebrating her ninetieth birthday on the
same day. You'll love her. You never know what's going to
come out of her mouth next."

While he spoke, Luis made mental notes. Barry was the

father, the one who never spoke to Jase on the phone. Mary
was the mother, the one who left bubbly messages on their
voice mail all the time. And Isabelle was the grandmother,
the one who never called but was always around to speak to
Jase when he called them. Unless Luis was told otherwise, he
intended to call them all either Mr. or Mrs. Nicholas. But he
liked knowing their full names just in case.

"Is there anyone else I should know about?" Luis asked.

"Are there any cousins or extended family? Are there any old
friends...or boyfriends popping up out of nowhere?" He was
only joking about the boyfriends. He knew Jase didn't have
any lost loves in Alaska.

The plane jerked and Camp let out a small yelp. Jase

reached across Luis's lap and picked up the pet carrier. He
opened the top and started petting Camp to reassure him

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everything was fine. "I'll just introduce people as they come
up," he said. "Stop worrying so much. It's going to be fine
and you're going to love Alaska. Trust me."

But when the big safe commercial jet landed in Anchorage

and Luis found out they were taking a small plane to Palmer
(Jase kept trying to explain Wasilla, Palmer, and the
surrounding area where Jase's family lived, but Luis wasn't
catching it; Alaska seemed so vast and complicated), he
stopped short in the middle of the airport and gulped. He
pressed the pet carrier to his chest and said, "I thought we
were driving there from here. I figured we'd rent a car. You
never mentioned a small plane. I can't fly in a small plane. I'll
die. I'd rather walk."

Jase put his arm around him and started walking. "It's

much faster to fly. Don't worry; small planes are just as safe
as large jets. Besides, I thought you were familiar with small
planes. Dr. Barton, your ex-partner, owned his own small
plane."

Luis sent him a fractious stare. He'd just silently

congratulated himself for getting through a commercial flight
without passing out cold or vomiting. "I never went up with
him in that dinky little plane. I kept my feet planted on the
ground, thank you." Just the thought of going up in a small
plane caused his heart to thump and his face to flush. He felt
like sitting down on the floor, folding his arms across his
chest, and refusing to budge.

Jase shrugged and spread his arms. "There's no other way.

I have my own small plane waiting. And we couldn't have
asked for better weather."

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Luis wrapped his arms around the pet carrier. The dog

yelped and Luis said, "I'm not getting on a small plane. Not in
a week with four Thursdays." He hadn't used this expression
in ages.

But Jase patted his back, pushed him forward, and said,

"C'mon. Let's get the luggage. You'll be fine. I'm an excellent
pilot. I've been flying for years."

* * * *

If Jase hadn't been the pilot, Luis never would have agreed

to fly in such a small plane. As it was, he bit the inside of his
mouth so hard it was sore and tender. Although this plane sat
six, and it wasn't as small as most, it reminded Luis of a large
black and white cigar with wings. But when Luis sat down and
watched Jase transform into a serious pilot, Luis forgot all
about his irrational fears and took a deep, silent breath. He
placed the pet carrier on the floor behind him and buckled his
seat belt. He gave Jase a reassuring nod and repositioned his
legs.

Jase furrowed his eyebrows and checked his gauges. He

gripped the wheel with one hand and clicked a few knobs and
switches with the other. He spoke into the radio with a clear,
even voice. Then he smiled, squeezed Luis's leg, and said
they were ready to take off. Before Luis even knew what was
happening, they were in the air and headed for the small
airport near Jase's family. It could have been Palmer or
Wasilla, but Luis wasn't sure and didn't think it mattered
enough to ask. He was only going there for a visit; he wasn't
moving in with them.

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Although Luis gripped the seat and kept his eyes closed

during take-off, he looked down when they were in the air
and pressed his palm to his chest. His heart stopped pounding
and his hands stopped trembling. When he looked out the
window, he smiled and said, "I've never seen anything so
magnificent in my life. The scenery is breathtaking. I feel as
though I'm in the middle of a dream." Everywhere he looked,
he saw squares and rectangles in different shades of green.
In the distance, the dramatic peaks and massive mountains
caused his jaw to drop.

Jase laughed. "I told you so. I knew you'd love it up here.

You can't see things this way from commercial jets because
they fly so much higher. But you can see everything in planes
like this." Then he rubbed Luis's leg and said, "You know what
would be really fun up here?"

"What?" Luis was still smiling, wishing he'd taken his new

digital camera out of his suitcase. He thought Jase was about
to suggest a few photos.

"If you took off all your clothes and did a solo for me,"

Jase said. "I'd love to watch you jack off up here in the sky."

"Keep dreaming," Luis said. There was no way he was

going to remove all his clothes there. Besides, even though
he'd calmed down he was still too wired to get an erection.

Jase adjusted his legs, spread them wide, and said, "You

want to give me head instead? Go ahead, pull down my
zipper. I dare you."

"You want me to blow you up here?"

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Jase shrugged. "We still have time before we land, and I'm

as hard as a rock. You don't have to work hard. I'll come
fast."

Luis reached across Jase's lap and touched his crotch. He

wasn't lying. His dick was fully erect and pulsing to get out of
his pants. "What is it with you and sex in the air? Is this
something new, or have you always had a thing about sex
and flying?"

"I get turned on up here," Jase said. "And if you don't suck

me off, I might have to jack off alone. It might make for a
very bumpy ride."

"You never told me about this before," Luis said. He

thought they'd covered every aspect of their sexual
preferences, kinks, and fetishes. Evidently, they'd been so
busy being in love with each other, there were still a few
things to learn.

Jase shrugged and sent him a tender gaze. "I guess I just

never thought about it until now. And this is the first time
we've ever flown together." Then he bucked his hips forward
and unzipped his pants. When his dick popped out of the
opening of his boxers and he reached down to grab it, the
flimsy plane dipped dramatically and jerked to the side.

Luis threw his arms up and said, "Okay. I'll give it a try.

But if I feel this plane jerk or bounce once, I'm stopping and
you're putting your dick back into your pants." Then he
adjusted his position so he could lean over. He turned the pet
carrier around so Camp couldn't see what he was doing, then
unbuckled his seat belt. When he took Jase's in his right
hand, Jase let out a gentle wheeze.

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At first, he just slid Jase's cock in and out of his mouth

with a robotic rhythm. But then something interesting
happened. While he was sucking Jase off, he became just as
aroused. He was terrified to even touch himself. But when he
looked up and saw Jase's determined, competent expression
and it occurred to him the plane was going to remain in the
air whether Luis came or not, he kicked off his shoes, yanked
off his socks, and removed his beige slacks with his
underwear so he could climax with Jase.

"Take everything off," Jase said. "If you're totally naked,

I'll come faster."

For a second or two, Luis contemplated the

embarrassment of dropping out of the sky and crashing
without his clothes on. But when he realized if this did happen
he'd be dead and it wouldn't matter anyway, he removed the
olive twill jacket, pulled off the white polo shirt and said,
"We're both going to go straight to hell for this."

Jase smiled and reached down to grab his ass. "Stretch out

and rub my dick with your foot for a minute. Rub your toes on
my balls."

"I'm not sure I can lift my leg over without knocking into

something important," Luis said. He didn't want to be
responsible for kicking a switch or knob and causing the plane
to drop out of the sky.

Jase smiled. "Just lift your leg high like you do when I fuck

you. You won't knock into anything."

Luis took a quick breath and followed Jase's order. It's a

good thing he'd always been agile and able to lift his legs into
positions most men couldn't manage. He sat back, lifted his

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smooth leg, and lowered it to Jase's lap. He moved with care
so he wouldn't touch any important switches or knobs. He
made sure he spread his legs wide so Jase could look down
and see the bottom of his ass. When he was situated in the
right position, he arched his bare foot and rubbed it up and
down Jase's hard shaft. Though it was awkward, he tapped
the head of Jase's dick with the pad of his big toe. Each time
his sole grazed the bottom of Jase's shaft Jase moaned out
loud. When his heel touched Jase's balls, Jase's entire body
jerked.

It didn't take long for Jase to grunt and say, "I'm so close."
"But I've hardly even touched your dick," Luis said. He was

only rubbing his toes against it. He knew Jase well enough by
now to know Jase often needed extra strokes to come.
Normally, Luis didn't mind this. When they fucked, it meant
Jase would last even longer. But this foot-rubbing thing was a
record for Jase.

"I can't help it," Jase said. "The thought of you sitting in

my plane, stark naked, with your legs open, stroking my dick
with your sexy little toes is making me wild. You have no idea
how many times I've flown and dreamed about a scene like
this. I just wish you could sit on my lap right now and ride me
until we land."

Luis removed his leg From Jase's lap and smiled. He rose

up on his seat, settled his weight on his knees, and said, "I
guess I'd better finish you off right now." Then he put his
head down between Jase's legs and started sucking.

This time it only took a minute or two to get Jase off. After

ten or eleven strong sucks, Jase gripped the wheel and shot

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such a strong load into Luis's mouth it hit the back of Luis's
throat with a sting. For the first time since they'd been up in
the air, Luis forgot all about his fear of flying. He gulped and
swallowed; he closed his eyes and started jacking his own
dick. While he continued to suck the last drops out of Jase, he
blew his load all over the right shoulder of his olive twill
jacket on the floor. Then he sucked until Jase became flaccid
in his mouth. After that, he put his arms around Jase's
shoulders, closed his eyes, and kissed him on the mouth.

By the time he sat back in his seat and reached for his

pants, Jase said, "You'd better buckle up now. We're getting
ready to descend." Jase spoke to the radio and told the
airport he was coming in for a landing.

"Huh?"
"We're here," Jase said, nodding down. He shoved his dick

back into his pants and pulled up his zipper.

"But I'm naked," Luis said. "I have to put my clothes on.

At least my underwear."

"You can put them on after we land," Jase said. "Just put

your seat belt on now and relax."

"But what if someone sees me?" Luis asked. He pulled the

seatbelt and wrapped it around his naked body.

Jase smiled and reached for Luis's leg. He slapped it hard

and said, "They will think I'm the luckiest gay man on the
planet to have a hot young lover like you with such a soft,
sweet ass." Then he took Luis's hand and squeezed it. "Did I
tell you I love you today?"

"Three times."

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"Well, I'm telling you again," Jase said. Then he let go of

Luis's hand so he could balance the wheel with both hands.

As they descended toward runway, Luis closed his eyes

and took a deep breath. He gripped the seat and bit the
inside of his mouth, praying he'd have enough time to put his
clothes on before anyone saw him sitting there stark naked.

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Three

A minute before the plane came to a full stop, Luis

unbuckled his seat belt and reached down for his pants. He
was still naked and he moved so fast his hands trembled.
"Damn, now I'm going to look all wrinkled and smashed," he
said. "And I can't find my freaking underpants anywhere.
Have you seen them?"

"How should I know where they are?" Jase said. "If you

hadn't been such a bad boy and insisted on taking off all your
clothes and blowing me, you'd still be wearing them." He was
joking around, trying to ease the tension he knew Luis must
have been feeling.

Luis glared at him. "This isn't funny, Jase. I can't find my

underwear, and I don't want to meet your family not wearing
underwear." He looked down to the right of the seat. "They
must be here somewhere. It's the sheer black thong."

"The see-through thong that rides up your ass? The one I

fucked you in last week?"

Luis nodded yes, rolled his eyes, and continued to rant.
While Luis searched, Jase waved and smiled at two people

standing on the other side of a metal fence. His mother and
grandmother had their arms in the air, waving them back and
forth. Jase knew they were too far away to see anything
inside the plane. But he also knew if he and Luis took too long
to get out of the plane, his mother and grandmother would
run over to the plane to see what was wrong.

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Luis was still naked. He was clutching his shirt and pants,

still looking for his underwear.

"Just put your pants on," Jase said. "Don't worry about

your underwear. We'll get it later."

Luis looked up. When he saw Jase waving, he asked, "Why

are you waving?" He figured Jase would have a Town Car
waiting for them at the airport. That's what he usually did
back in New York.

"My mother and grandmother are over there. They are

picking us up." He pointed to the fence. His grandmother was
fumbling with the gate, but she was having trouble getting it
to open. "And I think they are on their way over here to
welcome us."

Luis looked up and glanced out Jase's window. When he

saw them open the gate, he grabbed his pants and said, "Oh
shit." Then he pulled his pants up and put on his shirt. He
couldn't find his socks either. So he just put his black leather
quarter boots on without them.

"Calm down," Jase said, laughing. "You have plenty of

time. My grandmother isn't very fast. You actually still have
time to blow me again."

"Stop joking," Luis said. "This isn't funny. I'm meeting

your mother and grandmother for the first time and I'm not
wearing underwear or socks. I can just imagine what they will
think."

Jase rubbed his jaw. "Unless they pull down your pants or

unzip your boots, they won't even know."

By the time they reached the plane, Luis was putting on

his twill jacket. It's a good thing he was dressed, too. Jase's

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grandmother lifted her arms and banged her fists on Luis's
door. Then she swung it open and said, "What took you so
long? Is everything okay?"

Luis just sat there smiling at her. Then he turned to Jase

for support.

Jase leaned way over and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"We had to get the dog ready," he said. "The zipper on his pet
carrier got stuck." Then he zipped the top of the pet carrier
open and out popped Camp. He shook his blond mop, yelped
a couple of times, and crawled between Luis's seat and the
side of the plane before the grandmother had a chance to see
him.

Luis sent Jase a look and tried to reach down so he could

pick up Camp. The dog had gone to the bathroom outside the
large airport, but Camp was one of those male dogs that
could lift his leg and go anytime.

Then Jase's mother banged on the pilot's door and Jase

turned his back on Luis. He opened the door, jumped out of
the plane, and gave his mother a hug and a kiss. He hadn't
seen her since the previous August. She hadn't changed
much. Though there were a few more streaks of blond in her
medium-length auburn hair and her face appeared a little
thinner, she still looked more like a fifty-year-old than a sixty-
year-old. Even her jeans were too young. They were tight and
hugged her slim hips, with a thick brown belt that had a large
silver buckle. Though it was about fifty degrees that
afternoon, she was only wearing a flimsy cotton camisole and
no jacket.

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"You look wonderful, sweetheart," Mary said. "It's been too

long since you were home." She hugged him again. "I've
missed you."

"You look great, too," Jase said. The heels on her boots

must have been higher than usual. The top of her head met
the middle of his chest.

His grandmother had crossed to his side of the plane by

then. She threw her arms around his neck and snorted a few
times. She gave him a kiss and said, "I wish you'd just stay
here for good. This staying away from home for these long
stretches is bullshit."

Mary lowered her head and shook it in defeat.
Jase kissed his grandmother's soft cheek and laughed. "I

wish I could. But I've switched my main offices to New York in
the past year. Luis's work is in New York and he has to be
there full time." Then he hugged her again and patted her
back. Though his mother still looked the same, it always
shocked him to see his grandmother after any length of time
had passed. Until she'd reached eighty-five years old, she'd
rarely changed much from year to year. But after eighty-five,
it seemed as though each year that passed was more like two
or three years' worth of aging. Her teased fluff of blond hair
was still the same, her blue eyes still sparkled, and she
seemed spry enough for ninety. But Jase saw a few more
creases in her face and around her neck, and her body
seemed to be curling forward.

"Well, I wish there was a way to have the best of both

worlds," the grandmother said. "You belong here with your
family, not in New York. And nowadays, with all the high-tech

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shit they have, it should be simple to work anywhere.
Besides, you're the boss. Just tell them all to fucking move
here."

Jase laughed. The older she grew the more she cursed,

and she couldn't have cared less what anyone thought. More
often than not, she plowed through conversations, shocking
people with the most unlikely comments.

"Mom," Mary said, trying to hide a smile, "Please watch

your language. Jase has a guest." She didn't use the word
boyfriend, or date, or lover.

They all looked into the plane at the same time. Luis was

bent over on the seat, facing the back of the plane. "This is
Luis," Jase said. "Luis, this is my mother, Mary Nicholas, and
my grandmother, Isabelle Nicholas." He didn't mention Luis
was his fiance. He wanted to shout it to the world, but he
decided it was best to do things slowly and prepare his family.
So he didn't give him any title at all, which was something he
knew he'd be sorry for later. Since he'd come out of the closet
he'd learned gay men often referred to their partners in
casual ways, avoiding titles like boyfriend, lover, and fiance.
Instead of saying, "This is my fiance, or this is my husband,"
they would either leave it open and ambiguous, or refer to
their partner as their "friend." He'd even seen one couple in
New York, where one was twenty years old than the other,
pretend to be father and son for the sake of appearances.

It was all hugs and kisses on the surface, but Jase knew

his family was still reeling about his public announcement he
was gay. His father hadn't even showed up to welcome him.
Normally, his father would have been there.

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Luis turned and looked back at them. He smiled and

nodded. "It's nice to meet you. Then he looked at Jase and
said, "I can't seem to find Camp anywhere. I thought he was
down here somewhere." His voice was soft and calm, but his
eyes were screaming.

"He can't be far," Jase said. He tipped his head, motioning

Luis to come out and stand beside him. He knew Luis was
nervous; he knew he was stalling.

Luis stepped out of the plane and squared his shoulders.

He smoothed out his jacket and his wrinkled slacks and
crossed to the other side. When he smiled and said, "I'm
sorry I look like such a mess," Jase's grandmother pressed
both palms to her mouth and gasped.

Then she pointed to the ground and laughed. "Is this the

dog you were looking for?" she asked.

Luis turned and blinked.
Jase looked up at the sky and rolled his eyes.
Camp was on the ground beside Luis. He was holding

Luis's black thong in his mouth and he was shaking his little
head back and forth. The silky blond mop of hair flew every
which way; the see-through pouch part of the black thong
covered his nose.

Luis reached down fast and pulled the thong out of his

mouth. He shoved it into his jacket and said, "He must have
gotten into the luggage." By that time, his cheeks were
flushed and his voice was shaky. He sent Jase a pleading
stare and continued to smile.

Jase just laughed it off and waved his arm. He couldn't

blame the poor dog for chewing on Luis's thong. He'd done it

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plenty of times himself. Besides, his mother and grandmother
had no way of knowing Luis had removed all his clothes and
they'd just had sex in the air. It was a plausible excuse; the
dog could have gotten into the luggage. He was always doing
things like this in the apartment. He loved stealing Jase's
socks and hiding them beneath the covers in his little doggie
bed.

Camp looked up at Jase's grandmother and yelped a few

times. She put her hands on her hips and shook her head.
"Well, kiss my ass. What kind of dog is that?"

"Mom!" Mary shouted. "Your language. You just met Jase's

friend."

There it was again, Jase thought. She referred to Luis as

his friend, not as his partner, lover, or boyfriend. It seemed
to be expected, and it was partly his fault for not introducing
Luis as his fiance.

Isabelle ignored her daughter-in-law. She couldn't stop

staring Camp's bald body.

"It's a Chinese Crested, Mom-mom," Jase said.
When he called her Mom-mom, he saw Luis blink again. He

been calling his grandmother Mom-mom since he'd learned to
speak and he often forgot it sounded a little peculiar to other
people.

"A Chinese what?" she asked, leaning forward to examine

Camp.

"Chinese Crested," Jase said.
The old woman looked Luis up and down. "I'll bet he cost a

pretty penny."

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"Luis rescued him," Jase said. "He didn't cost a dime. He

was all alone and he followed Luis home one night, and Luis
has been caring for him ever since. We both strongly believe
in animal rescue." He wanted to set her straight. He had a
feeling she was implying Luis had expensive New York taste in
trendy little dogs and he wasn't going to let her get away with
it. Though he knew his grandmother loved him, he also knew
she didn't take to strangers well. Especially when she wasn't
sure how the strangers were connected to her family and her
way of life.

Camp ignored them all. He cocked his head and galloped

to the left tire. Then he lifted his leg and peed.

Isabelle rubbed her chin. "I hear they eat dogs like that in

China," she said. "It's a delicacy." She folded her arms across
her bosom, tightened her lips, and nodded.

Luis's eyes popped and he reached down and scooped

Camp up in his arms. The little dog kissed him on the cheek,
then turned to Isabelle and snarled a few times.

When Jase saw the dog snarl, he figured it was time to get

moving. So he reached inside the plane and started to
remove the luggage. There were only two suitcases and two
shoulder bags. Jase's bags—a large suitcase and matching
shoulder bag—were Louis Vuitton. Luis's bags were a
mismatched unkempt vinyl set—one black, the other beige—
he'd been lugging around since he'd left Dr. Barton's house
and moved to New York.

But when Isabelle saw the expensive luggage she ran her

palm across the handle of the suitcase and looked up at Luis.

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"You have expensive taste in luggage," she said, sending him
a catty grin.

"Those are mine," Jase said, lifting Luis's worn black

suitcase out of the plane. He smiled and swung it back and
forth. "These belong to Luis. I wanted to get him new luggage
for the trip, but he said there was nothing wrong with what he
already had." He knew she was testing Luis again, politely
implying Luis was the type who wouldn't travel without
expensive designer luggage.

The old woman lifted a crooked eyebrow and punched

Luis's arm with affection. "I like that," she said. "I've had the
same luggage since 1958. And it's still as good now as it was
then."

"I love vintage luggage," Luis said.
Isabelle's face twisted and she gaped at him. "Huh?" To

her the luggage was as good as new, not vintage.

Mary laughed. "But you haven't left Alaska since 1958,

Mom."

Isabelle gave her daughter-in-law a nasty look. "That's not

the point. The point is there's no use spending money on new
luggage when the old shit is in perfect shape."

Mary rolled her eyes. She grinned at Jase and said, "Just

so you know, she's talking about the luggage I bought last
year for a cruise I took with your father. She wanted us to
take her old luggage and I wanted new luggage. She hasn't
forgiven me."

Though Jase's mother had always maintained a good

relationship with her mother-in-law, Jase knew it hadn't
always been easy. Long before Jase made his first million on

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his inventions, and long before he became known as the
Virgin Billionaire thanks to his Virgin Alaskan Spring Water,
his family had been well-known business people in Alaska.
They owned half the businesses in their little town and
several more in other towns. Before Jase's father had retired
from law to focus on his businesses, he been an attorney
actively involved in Alaskan politics. But they hadn't started
out that way. His paternal grandparents had worked their way
up during the Great Depression the hard way, and his
grandmother never let anyone forget about it. It didn't matter
how much money they had now. In her eyes, buying new
luggage was a wasteful, frivolous task, which was just as evil
as using electricity and throwing out day-old bread.

Jase tugged Luis's sleeve and said, "We'd better get

moving." Then he looked down at Luis's shoulder and saw the
come stains Luis had left on the jacket when he'd jerked off in
the plane.

Luis tilted his head and gave him a curious stare.
Jase smiled and leaned forward. But before he had a

chance to whisper about the come stains, Isabelle pointed to
Luis's shoulder and said, "What's that? Did you spill
something on your nice jacket, young man?"

Luis shrugged and looked down at his shoulder. When he

saw the dried come stain, his eyes grew wide and he said, "I
spilled a drink on the flight from New York."

Isabelle moved in closer for a better look. "It must have

been something with cream," she said.

When she licked her index finger and made a move to wipe

the stain off, Luis jerked his shoulder back before she could

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touch him and said, "It was latte. It'll come out. I'll worry
about it later."

Isabelle reached down for a suitcase and said, "You just

give it to me when we get to the house. There isn't a stain in
the world I can't remove."

Jase patted Luis's back and smiled. He sent him a knowing

look and said, "See, my grandmother has been removing
stains like this all her life."

On the way to the car, Luis offered to carry both of the

larger suitcases so Jase could go on ahead with his mother
and grandmother. Jase tossed both shoulder bags over his
arms and Mary carried Camp's empty pet carrier. The dog
walked alongside Luis, about twenty paces behind Jase, Mary,
and Isabelle. He liked to walk alone, but he wasn't the type of
dog that needed a leash, especially when he was in a strange
place. He tended to remain close to Luis or Jase at all times,
and from what Jase could see Alaska must have seemed
pretty odd to him. He kept lifting his head while he walked,
moving it back and forth, sniffing things the rest of them
couldn't smell.

When they reached the car, Jase tossed the shoulder bags

into the back seat and rubbed his palms together. "I'll drive,"
he said. "I love driving this old Jeep." The big Jeep Wagoneer
was over thirty years old. Jase had learned to drive behind
the wheel of this car. He'd driven some of the most expensive
cars in the world, but nothing compared to this old Jeep.

But the others just stopped and gaped at him for a

moment.

Mary said, "Why don't I drive, dear? You must be tired."

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Isabelle shook her head and smacked her lips. "If he's

driving, I'm not getting in the car. I managed to live ninety
years, and I don't want one short trip with him behind the
wheel to finish my tired old ass off for good."

Then Luis smiled and said, "I'll drive. I don't mind. I like

driving."

"Are you old enough for a driver's license, dear?" Isabelle

asked. Though her voice was low and tender, there was a hint
of viciousness in her tone. She was either implying Luis was
much too young to be with a forty-year-old man or just
inquiring about his age in general. With Isabelle, you couldn't
be sure. She'd eloped with Jase's grandfather when she was
fifteen years old, so she was far from being a prude. And
Jase's grandfather had been fifteen years older than her.

Jase frowned. He sent his grandmother a seething glare

and said, "Luis is twenty-two." He took the keys from his
mother's hand and handed them to Luis. "And he's an
excellent driver."

Luis reached for the keys and looked into Jase's eyes.

"Thank you. I didn't know you thought I was such a good
driver."

When Luis looked at him this way, with his big green eyes

and his soft tender lips, Jase's heart still pounded with the
same excitement he'd experienced the first day he'd met Luis.
Though he was standing in an airport parking lot in Alaska,
with just one glance he'd been magically transported back to
that slip-shod walk-up apartment on the Upper West Side of
Manhattan. "I love the way you drive."

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"Well, as long as Jase isn't driving it doesn't matter,"

Isabelle said. She tended to blurt these things out without
thinking about them ahead of time. "Let's get this show on
the road. I want to get back to the house." Then she opened
the passenger door and plopped down on the front seat.

When they were on the road, Jase and his mother sat in

the back seat and talked about old friends and familiar places.
Isabelle and Camp sat up front with Luis. Camp parked
himself between them and rested his chin on Isabelle's left
leg. At first Isabelle thought he was warming up to her, so
she tried to pet the top of his head. But when she lowered her
shaky palm, Camp looked up at her cross-eyed and snarled.

"Be good, Camp," Luis said.
"Does the little fucker bite?" she asked.
Luis smiled, keeping his eyes on the road. He leaned to the

right and spoke in a stage whisper. Jase was listening to his
mother go on about one of the neighbors, but he overheard
Luis say, "Only if you show the little fucker a roasting pan, a
set of chopsticks, and a big old bottle of soy sauce."

Isabelle sent Luis an approving glance and grinned. "I'll

remember that, you little smart ass."

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Chapter Four

As he drove through a small, unfamiliar town, Luis couldn't

help noticing a few storefronts had signs with the name
Nicholas over their doors. He noticed a hardware store, a
plumbing supply, and a clothing store. In one cloistered strip
mall there was a pharmacy and a small market with the
Nicholas name. On the outskirts of town, he even saw a small
greasy spoon with a large sign that read, "Nicholas Chick N
Beer."

When he stopped for red lights, people crossing streets

smiled at the Jeep until they saw he was driving it. They
leaned forward with confused expressions to get better looks.
They poked the person next them and murmured something.
But when they looked into the back seat and saw Mary
Nicholas, their expressions softened and they waved and
smiled in her direction.

Mary waved back at them, telling Jase from the side of her

mouth who they were and what the latest local gossip about
them was. A full-sized woman on one corner had been
through gastric bypass surgery six months earlier, another
woman crossing the next street was going through a bitter
divorce, and at the corner of an intersection near the library
Mary waved to a man with one arm. She frowned and sighed,
then patted Jase's hand. "That's Lucy Cling's boy. You
remember him. You and Lucy went to high school together.
He just returned from Iraq, God bless him."

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Isabelle sat still with her fingers laced on her lap,

occasionally looking down to see what Camp was doing. His
chin was still resting on her lap, his eyes were closed, and he
was breathing with an even snore. Luis knew Camp liked her.
If he hadn't, he would have rested his chin on Luis's lap
instead. But Luis had a feeling it was going to take a while
before he'd let her pet him. All this Alaska business was so
new to Camp he was probably overwhelmed. The poor little
thing had never been out of New York.

Luis started to feel overwhelmed, too, especially when Jase

told him to make an unexpected right turn into a marina. By
this time, Luis didn't know where he was anymore. If they'd
asked him to drive back to the airport, he wouldn't have had
a clue. If they'd told him to get out and find his own way back
to New York, he would have sat down on a curb and cried.
He'd never been good with directions in the first place. For all
he knew, they were on their way to Russia.

"Park over there," Jase said, pointing to a row of empty

parking spaces that overlooked a body of water.

Luis pulled into the space and switched off the engine. He

looked back and forth a few times and asked, "Where's the
hotel?" He'd assumed they'd be staying at a local hotel. He'd
been looking forward to taking off all his clothes and getting
into bed naked with Jase.

But Mary spoke up. "Family never stays in a hotel. You'll

be staying in our home, Luis."

This made his stomach tighten. He imagined a flat brick

ranch house with a chain link fence, and sleeping in Jase's
childhood bedroom in bunk beds with cowboy and Indian

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sheets. They'd never discussed where Jase stayed when he
went to Alaska, and that was because Jase hadn't been there
since last August. Most of the time they'd spent alone the
past year together had been in bed having sex. Luis didn't see
any homes nearby, just a marina building, people bustling in
different directions, and rows of docked boats. "Is your home
near the marina?" He figured since they owned so many
businesses in town, maybe they owned the marina, too.
Maybe they lived above the marina.

"Not quite," Isabelle said. She opened the door and

removed her seat belt. "But we're almost there."

While Mary and Isabelle were at the back of the Jeep

opening the door so Luis and Jase could remove the luggage,
Luis pulled Jase aside and asked, "Why are we parked at a
marina?" There was an uncertain edginess in his tone. He had
a feeling he was about to be placed in an awkward situation
again.

"We'll take the boat to the house." There was an upbeat

tone in his voice.

Luis's eyes expanded. He grabbed Jase's sleeve. "I can't

swim. I try to stay as far away from water as possible."

"We're not swimming to the house," Jase said. "We're

taking the boat. You'll love it." Then he gave him an
affectionate slap on the back and walked back to where his
mother and grandmother were standing.

Luis picked up Camp and turned to glare at the water. He

wasn't even sure what body of water this was. He bit his
bottom lip and took a rugged breath. When he exhaled,
Camp's ears went up. The only thing he detested more than

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flying was riding in boats, especially across large bodies of
deep water. The thought alone cinched his eyebrows and
twisted his face. He'd once been invited to a party on Fire
Island with one of his former clients, an older gentleman who
owned antiques stores, and he'd faked the flu because he
couldn't imagine taking the ferry to Fire Island. The old guy
had promised to pay him five hundred dollars. But Luis didn't
think there was enough money to get him on the ferry.
Though Luis never admitted this fear of water to anyone, he
took pride in knowing he was probably the only gay man in
New York who'd never been to Fire Island.

Then Camp jumped out of his arms and galloped to the

back of the car where Isabelle was standing. He stood beside
her and looked up. When she didn't look down at him, he
lifted his front right paw and jabbed her in the ankle a few
times.

"Will you look at this?" Isabelle said. She bent down and

picked him up. "He wants to sit with me on the boat. I think
the snippy little fucker's taken a liking to me." Though she'd
cursed, there was affection in her tone.

"I was going to put him in the pet carrier," Luis said. "He's

never been on a boat and he can't swim." He wondered if
they had little doggie life jackets on the boat. Oh, poor Camp.
He wasn't going to like this at all.

Isabelle waved her arm in dismissal. "That's bullshit," she

said. "All dogs can swim." She made a face and rubbed her
nose against Camp's nose. "Even little bald fuckers like this
one."

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"He'll be fine," Jase said, handing Luis two suitcases. "Stop

worrying."

Then Jase slammed the back door shut and walked off with

his mother, Isabelle, and Camp, leaving Luis in the
background to carry both large suitcases. Luis lifted the
suitcases and stared at their backs. They were laughing. Jase
tossed his head back a few times and slapped his knee. Camp
was trotting right by their sides, with his tongue hanging out
and his tail wagging.

Though Luis thought he knew everything about Jase, this

was a side of him Luis had never seen. Now that Jase was
home in Alaska, there was something different about him that
was hard to pinpoint. He walked with a slightly heaver step;
he spoke with a different accent altogether, exaggerating his
r's and pronouncing his a's as if the sounds were coming from
the back of his throat. They all seemed so earthy and athletic.
And Jase didn't seem concerned about the fact that Luis's
heart was pounding, his stomach was turning, and his legs
were ready to buckle at the prospect of getting into a boat.

Worst of all, this wasn't at all like the boat docks Luis had

seen in New York. In order to reach these docks, people had
to climb down this long, straight narrow ladder from the
parking lot, a flimsy wooden affair with uneven rungs and
splintered sides. Ninety-year-old Isabelle went down first. She
hooked Camp under her right arm and maneuvered her way
down with her left hand. Luis leaned over with his hand
pressed to his stomach and watched them descend. Camp's
head was cocked and his eyes were wide; his tail wagged all
the way down. Mary went next. She tossed some luggage

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over first, then lifted her leg and slipped down the ladder in
her high-heeled boots one rung at a time. Then Jase tossed
the rest of the luggage over the ledge and followed the other
two.

Luis gulped and stepped back. Who were these people?

They were all so nimble and confident, just sailing down the
skimpy ladder as though they were squirrels backing down a
tree trunk. All Luis had to do was look down and he started to
wheeze. The ladder had to be at least three stories tall. If you
missed a rung, it could be the death of you.

Jase looked up and shaded his eyes with his hand. "What

are you waiting for? C'mon down."

Luis moved to the edge with slow, gentle steps. Though

he'd worn a casual outfit, he was wearing his new leather
Pradas and the soles were still slippery. He looked down at
Jase and frowned. "I'm not sure about this," he said. "You
know how I am with heights. And these shoes have slippery
soles." If he'd known he was going to be hiking down Jacob's
ladder, he would have packed a pair of Birkenstocks. He
gazed down at Mary and Isabelle. He felt lightheaded and
flimsy. They were gazing up, waiting for his next move.

When Luis saw Isabelle poke Mary and he overheard her

say, "He's a little delicate, isn't he?" he realized he couldn't
stand there all day cowering down at them. He didn't want
Jase's family to think he was a milquetoast city boy without a
clue. After all, he had grown up in Tennessee and he wasn't
stranger to country living. So he clenched his teeth and
lowered his leg to the ladder. He gripped both sides and
concentrated on his footing without looking down once.

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When he was halfway down, Jase climbed up to where his

feet were and said, "You're almost there. You're doing fine.
By the time you get down, my grandmother will only be one
hundred and ten." Then Jase reached up and guided him
down the rest of the way to speed things up a little.

At the bottom rung, Jase grabbed his ass and squeezed it

a few times. Mary and Isabelle were walking toward the boat
and their backs were turned to them. Camp trailed behind
Isabelle, watching every move she made. Luis backed into
Jase's hand and sighed. "I feel better now," he said.

Jase rubbed his ass and smiled. "Would you like to sit on

my lap when we're in the boat? I'll tell my mother to drive
and we can sit together."

"I would love to sit on your lap," Luis said. "I'd love

nothing more than if you just put your arms around me right
now. But I think your mother and grandmother would fall
overboard in shock." He moved away from Jase's hand and
picked up the suitcases. This was one of those times when
being gay could be so unfair. If Luis had been a woman, Jase
wouldn't have thought twice about putting his arms around
him and reassuring him. A kiss on the cheek would have been
nice; a tender hug would have made all the difference in the
world. There wouldn't have been anything sexual or lewd
about it. But if a man put his arms around another man just
to make him feel secure, the world seemed to turn and look
in their direction as if they were doing something offensive
instead of natural. So Luis started walking to the boat.
Without turning, he said, "I'll be fine. I'll just hold on really
tight. And I want the biggest life jacket on the boat."

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Though Jase couldn't drive a car fifty feet without hitting

something, he stood behind the steering wheel of the boat
and backed it out of the narrow dock with absolute certainty.
When he turned it around, he did it without a jerk, a knock,
or a splash. And when he started cruising forward it felt as if
they were gliding across a smooth layer of ice. Luis didn't
know a thing about boats. But this one had to be expensive.
For one thing, it was the biggest boat in the marina, and for
another, there was room for at least a dozen people.

Mary sat in the seat next to where Jase was steering.

Isabelle and Camp sat beside Luis on one long brown leather
seat at the rear. When the boat started picking up speed, Luis
sat bundled in his life jacket, gripping the seat with clenched
fists and biting the inside of his mouth. He felt Isabelle's eyes
on him, waiting for his next move. At one point, he turned
toward her and she looked away fast, rolling her eyes.

But as they sailed into more open water and the town

disappeared in the background, Luis couldn't help marveling
at the scenery. Though he was still clutching the seat cushion,
this was the bluest sky he'd ever seen. The clouds seemed
puffier and brighter; the water seemed slicker and cleaner.
Luis wasn't a stranger to mountains; he'd grown up near the
Blue Ridge Mountains. But the mountains in Alaska were
different from any other mountains he'd ever seen. They
seemed to rise higher and sharper, with majestic peaks and
animated inclines. Flocks of seagulls zipped past them,
squawking and flapping against the soft breeze. Everywhere
Luis looked he saw either shades of deep green or brilliant
blue. Though the temperature that day was only in the mid-

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fifties, the entire atmosphere calmed his racing heart and
warmed his body.

When they finally rounded a tree-covered bend, Jase

slowed the boat down and floated into a small quiet cove. Luis
looked up and his jaw dropped. High on a hill overlooking the
water, sat the most magnificent old home he'd ever seen. The
shingles were pale gray and the trim bright white. The first
floor was solid stone, with large windows and more white
trim, and the hedgerows were trimmed into flat even fences.
It had turrets and towers, peaks and gables. It was the kind
of big old house a person could stare at for hours and still not
be able to remember all the details without taking a second
and third look.

The dock led to a wide, green lawn tilting up toward the

house. Luis released the straps on his life jacket and leaned
forward. "This is where you live?"

Isabelle sent him a curious look. "My husband and I rebuilt

it in 1950. The original house was much smaller." She pointed
and said, "If you look closely, you can still see the original
frame before we added everything else. In many ways, it's
still a work in progress."

Luis sat back and sighed. He didn't stop staring at the

house until Jase pulled up to the dock and told him to grab
the rope and secure the back of the boat. He wasn't sure
whether his heart had stop pounding because the boat ride
was over or because he felt so peaceful about his
surroundings. For the first time since he'd left New York, he
felt good about where he was.

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On the way up to the house, Mary and Isabelle walked

ahead of them. Camp strutted at his own pace, not far behind
Isabelle. Luis grabbed Jase's sleeve and said, "You didn't tell
me it was anything like this."

Before Jase could reply, Isabelle turned and said, "It's

because he's modest, dear. We don't brag. We are very
humble people."

"I know," Luis said, putting her in her place nicely. "It's

one of the things I've always admired about Jase." Luis wasn't
talking about how big the house was or its value. He was
talking about Jase's taste. He knew Jase had money; he knew
Jase was a billionaire. But he'd always thought Jase had more
modern taste. His apartment in New York was expensive but
simple, and modern to the point of being too cold and sharp.

Jase shrugged his shoulders and said, "This is home.

Everywhere else is just a place to live."

When Jase put it this way, Luis felt a sting in his eyes. He'd

always thought of their apartment in Trump Tower as their
home. He had no idea Jase had just thought of it as stopoff
while he longed to return to his real home in Alaska.

If Luis had wanted to pursue the conversation, there

wouldn't have been time. The moment they stepped onto the
path that led up to the main house, a group of people
appeared at the other end of the path and started waving at
them.

Jase rolled his eyes. "What is all this? Why are these

people here?"

"It's just a little welcome party," Mary said. She didn't stop

walking or turn around. "Just a few friends and family to

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celebrate you coming home after such a long time. And all the
cheeses have been smoked with your new invention, the
home cheese smoker."

Jase smiled and started walking faster.
But Luis stopped. He faced Jase. "A party?" He hadn't been

expecting a party the first day there. As it stood, he wasn't
sure how to act or speak with Jase. And what if all these
people had read the tabloids and knew about his involvement
with Derrick?

"It'll be fine," Jase said. "Everyone will love you just as

much as I do."

Luis adjusted the suitcases and starting walking. It wasn't

as if he had much of a choice. Though he'd only known Mary
and Isabelle for a few minutes, he knew where Jase had
inherited his aggressive tendencies. These women knew what
they wanted and they weren't afraid to plow forward to get it.
Luis had this sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach he
wasn't meeting their standards.

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Five

When they entered the house, there were people

everywhere. Isabelle disappeared in the kitchen with Camp.
Before she left, she said, "I'll get this poor little guy some
water." She picked him up and patted his head. "He must be
dying of thirst by now."

Jase gave Luis a look and rolled his eyes. "He'll be okay.

She's good with dogs." He could see Luis was worried. Luis
stretched out his arms and made an attempt to stop Isabelle.
Though Camp wasn't snarling at her now, the upper part of
his snout was vibrating as if he wasn't sure whether or not to
growl and show his teeth. In New York, Camp pretty much did
whatever he wanted, and Luis and Jase catered to his every
need. He was more like a cat than a dog. He came to them
when he wanted affection, not when they wanted to give it to
him. Jase wasn't sure whether his grandmother would
understand this.

Luis smiled and shrugged his shoulders. "If he snaps at her

there's nothing I can do. You know how he is." Sometimes
Camp would be sitting on Jase or Luis's lap and they'd be
petting his head. Out of nowhere, he'd turn and snap at their
fingers.

Jase smiled and nodded at someone who passed by them.

He couldn't remember the person's name, but he knew it was
one of his mother's friends from way back. "Let's just hope
my grandmother doesn't snap back. She's been known to do

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this on occasion." Then he put his palm on the small of Luis's
back and guided him into the dining room.

This party wasn't just a little intimate get-together with a

few friends and family members. The dining room table was
jammed with food, there was a long line at the bar, and it
looked as though Jase's mother had invited half of Alaska.
There were waiters carrying trays and bartenders pouring
drinks. Jase hadn't seen most of these people in years, and
some were totally unfamiliar. Though he had been coming
back and forth frequently to Alaska over the years, he'd spent
most of his time building his businesses in Florida, and his
trips to Alaska were just quick jaunts. Everywhere he gazed
he saw faces from his past, but he couldn't remember their
names. Mr. and Mrs. So-and-so were holding plates of food
and talking to Miss What's-it from the town library. The old
guy who worked as the manager of the Chick N Beer was
lurking around with a tall glass of beer in his hand. And the
famous politician from Wasilla was standing at the far end of
the living room talking to her husband. Her entire family,
including her handsome future son-in-law who tended to get
into trouble all the time, was sitting on the sofa beside where
she stood. Jase rubbed his jaw and frowned. He knew she
was extremely conservative and wasn't sure how she'd react
to him being so openly gay.

Luis must have noticed his expression fall. "What's

wrong?" he asked in a stage whisper.

They were standing next to the dining room table, where

people were filling their plates with all kinds of food. A woman
Jase recognized from the virgin spring water plant walked up

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and shook his hand on her way to the living room. "Nice to
see you," he said. Then he turned to Luis and scowled. "My
father invited that conservative politician from Wasilla. The
one who is against legalizing same-sex marriage." He
clenched his fists and grimaced. His father was heavily
involved in Alaskan politics. Though he was an independent
voter and tended to shift in all different directions when it
came to issues, he remained close to the most important
politicians in Alaska. "I should have known." He had a feeling
his father had invited her on purpose.

Luis shook a strange man's hand and said, "Nice meeting

you," then lowered his voice and told Jase, "I'm sure it's
nothing. I don't even know who she is."

Luis was being too naive, Jase thought, but he said

nothing aloud. Luis Fortune had to be the most politically
clueless human he'd ever met. While they'd been watching
the news one night last November after they'd just had sex,
and Luis had heard the announcer say the Democrats wanted
to hold the next Democratic Convention in Philadelphia, he'd
turned to Jase and sighed. "That's one of the reasons I just
can't stand politics. Can you imagine how dull it would be?
Now if they held the next Democratic Convention in Paris, I'd
be a lot more interested. I'd even think about going."

Jase had just turned and blinked. When he'd seen Luis was

absolutely serious, he wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. So
he'd decided to let it go. Jase wasn't the most political person
himself. He didn't even contribute to political campaigns
because he thought his money would be better served with a
good charity that actually helped people. But at least he knew

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the basics when it came to issues, and conventions like this,
Republican or Democrat, were held in the United States, not a
foreign country. But Luis just flipped the channel to watch
entertainment news with that Ryan Seacrest guy who seemed
to be everywhere Jase turned these days. And as Seacrest
started talking about Beyonce and Luis leaned forward so he
wouldn't miss a word, Jase just sat back and smiled. He
wasn't in love with Luis for his politics. He was in love with
him because of his warm, kind heart. It was this very
innocence when it came to politics and serious matters that
Jase loved most about him.

So Jase smiled and said, "I don't trust don't trust that

woman. I don't trust any politician. They can be vicious, and I
don't want to wind up in her next book or in her next speech
as an example of the horrors of same-sex couples and how
they are trying to ruin the sanctity of marriage. Watch
everything you say, especially with her."

"This seems to be the problem," Luis said. "I'm not sure

what to say or how to act. Do they know we're a couple? Do
they know we're together?" He pressed his fingers to his lips
and giggled. "I'll bet they are all wondering whether or not
you're the top or the bottom. Straight people always think
one is the man and one is the woman."

Jase rubbed his jaw and frowned. He had been thinking

the same thing. Whenever straight people find out a man is
gay and he has a lover, they just can't wait to figure out who
the "man" in the relationship is and who the "woman" in the
relationship is. Or, in other words, who is the top and who is
the bottom.

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But he didn't want to get into this with Luis. "Just be

yourself," he said. "I'm not sure how to act either. After all,
the last time any of these people saw me I was straight and
divorced. No one knew I was gay." Though the entire house
peered and gawked at them, no one came over and
acknowledged them as a gay couple. It wasn't an unfriendly
feeling; just awkward, as if people were afraid to approach
them. Even though they all knew he and Luis were together,
they felt more comfortable ignoring the fact that they were
gay.

Then an older couple walked up to them and reached out

to shake their hands. The husband was the high school
principal and the wife was a dentist in Palmer. From what
Jase recalled about them, they were the local left-wing
liberals. They wrote letters to the editor expressing their
liberal opinions, posted huge signs for liberal candidates
outside their home during election season, and tended to
overcompensate about their beliefs to prove to everyone just
how left wing they were.

The man shook Jase's hand and said, "It's so nice to see

you boys together out here."

Jase smiled and shook his hand. He appreciated them

coming over to say something. But he hated being called a
boy by anyone. He was a man, a billionaire who could buy
and sell everyone in the room, yet they still had the
unmitigated gall to refer to him as a boy because he'd
admitted he was gay.

When the woman shook Luis's hand she smiled and asked,

"So what is it exactly you do in New York?"

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Jase knew she was referring to his former career as an

escort for older men. She wasn't being malicious; just
exerting her liberal voice of approval and letting him know
she supported his past.

But as Luis was about to answer her, Jase's father sidled

up to them out of nowhere, looked Luis in the eye, and
smiled. "I was wondering about that myself," he said. He was
smiling and his voice was friendly enough, but Jase knew his
father well enough to know when he was being sarcastic.

Jase reached out to shake his father's hand. "Hello, Dad."

His hair looked grayer and there were a few more wrinkles
around the corners of his eyes. His nose was red, as if he'd
been drinking too much that afternoon.

Barry smiled at his son, said hello, then glared at Luis with

a sneaky grin. "You must be Lester."

"Ah well, it's Luis."
"Barry," Jase's father said, offering his hand, still grinning.

"It's a pleasure to meet you."

Then Barry turned to the married couple and said, "So why

don't you tell us exactly what you do in New York, Lance?
From what I read in the newspapers, it sounds fascinating."

"Ah, Luis."
Jase looked up and rolled his eyes. He had a feeling his

father would be arrogant.

The woman laughed, ignoring the dig about his name.

"Yes, it does sound fascinating. I'd love to hear all about it in
detail." She smiled at Jase. "And I'd love to hear about your
latest project, too, Jase. What's the next million-dollar
invention?"

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Jase didn't like talking about his new inventions until they

were ready to be presented. He was working on a new pole
extension, so people could clean their gutters and rooftops
without climbing ladders, but he didn't want to discuss it. And
he knew his father was looking for an argument. He was
referring to the way the newspapers had portrayed Luis as a
male escort who'd become involved with the wrong people.
Though they had reported Luis was completely innocent and
free of all guilt, they'd also made him sound capricious and
not very bright.

"Jase's latest project was a home cheese smoker," Barry

said. He was still grinning, but there was a hint of indignation
in his tone. "That's my son, the cheese expert. Oh, he's the
cheese man all right. Isn't that right, Luke?" He slapped Luis
so hard on the back he lurched forward.

Luis sent Barry a friendly stare. He lifted his chin. "The

name is Luis, Fred."

Jase rolled his eyes. Now Luis was giving his father

attitude. He couldn't even get mad at Luis. His father
deserved it.

Barry just lowered his eyelids halfway and glared at Luis.

He didn't correct him.

Jase pressed his lips together and took a few quick

breaths. His father was giving him two shots at the same
time. One, it was clear to Jase his father didn't approve of his
new lifestyle or his new partner. Two, it had always been
clear to Jase his father looked down on the way he'd made his
billions. Barry thought it was hysterical people would buy
bottled water. He'd never been able to grasp the concept that

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people would pay a lot of money for something that was
usually absolutely free. If Barry had had his way, Jase would
have gone to law school and remained in Alaska to follow in
his father's footsteps. Barry never completely forgave him for
not doing this.

Before anyone could respond, Barry lifted his cocktail glass

and said, "I'm getting a refill. I'm not drunk yet." Then he
turned his back on them and crossed to the bar in the next
room.

The married couple smiled and walked back to the food

table.

Luis tilted his head toward Jase, sending him a sarcastic

grin that was even more intense than Barry's. "What a
charming man. I can't wait to see what he says or does next."

Jase clenched his fists and exhaled. Then he left Luis

standing there and followed his father into the next room.

When Jase caught up with him, he tapped his shoulder

from behind and said, "Thanks for being so polite to Luis. I'm
proud of you. You're a real gentleman." He'd learned sarcasm
well from his father.

Barry turned and looked him in the eye. "What the fuck?

You show up a year later with this flimsy Luis person, after
everything that was in the newspapers and on TV about him
and his so-called clients, after announcing to the entire world
you're suddenly gay, and you expect me to react differently?
Don't make me laugh in your face."

"We haven't been here for fifteen minutes," Jase said. "I

thought you could at least be decent enough to say hello
before you started judging us." He noticed the sarcastic grin

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on his father's face had turned into a frown. "I have to admit
I had my doubts about you after you divorced Mira," Barry
said. "I had a feeling it was mid-life crisis and you'd wind up a
cliche with a string of twenty-year-old blond bimbos. But I
never figured you'd wind up with some silly teenage male
escort who spends his time working old men." He looked up
and gazed into Jase's eyes; he kept his voice low and even.
"Dear God, he looks like a kid."

"That silly teenage male escort, as you put it, is becoming

one of the most respected male models in the world," Jase
said. "He's going back to school next year to get a degree in
journalism. He pays his own way and never asks me for a
dime."

"He's your piece of ass. He's your high-end rent boy who's

taking advantage of a good thing while he has it. He hit the
lottery with you." Barry looked around to see if anyone was
listening. "And you brought him here to meet your mother."
He lowered his head and shook it back and forth. "I never
thought I'd see the day when you made a complete fool of
yourself in public."

Jase squared his shoulders. If his father was going to blast

him with rude comments about Luis and his lifestyle, he
wasn't afraid to shoot back. "You've got it all wrong. He's not
my rent boy. He's my fiance. We're getting married as soon
as we work out the details."

Barry's head went up fast. "What did you say?"
"You heard me," Jase said. "I'm planning to marry Luis."

He glared into his father's eyes one more time, then turned
and left him standing there alone with his mouth half open.

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But Jase didn't leave it at that. His chest was pounding; his

face felt hot. He was proud of all he'd achieved, both
personally and professionally, in the past year and he wasn't
going to revert back to his old ways and hide from anyone or
anything.

So after he left his father, he crossed into the living room

and stood in front of the fireplace. When he lifted his arms
and said, "Attention everyone. I have an important
announcement to make," Luis wasn't even in the room. They
hadn't discussed this ahead of time, but Jase couldn't control
himself. The first floor of the large house had been redesigned
with an open floor plan, and he knew Luis could hear him,
wherever he was.

Everyone stopped talking and turned to watch him. His

mother was talking to the conservative politician and her
husband near the sofa. His grandmother was sitting in a club
chair stroking the mop on Camp's head and feeding him
watercress sandwiches.

Jase smiled and said, "I'd like to announce my

engagement to Luis Fortune." The entire room went silent.
His grandmother blinked and gaped at his mother. His mother
just stood there with her arms dangling haplessly at her
sides. He lifted his hand and showed them the large diamond
ring on his finger. "That's right. We're engaged to be
married." Then he scanned the room to see where Luis was.

When Luis peaked around a wall separating the dining

room from the living room, Jase motioned for him and said,
"There you are. C'mon over, dumpling." He'd never called
Luis dumpling before. He wasn't sure what had come over

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him. He hadn't even planned on making a huge
announcement like this at the party, and certainly not so
soon, but his father had infuriated him so much he wanted to
prove to himself and to the world he wasn't going to back
down. If he'd been straight and he'd just announced he was
planning to marry a woman, no one would have given it a
second thought. Why should it have been different because
he was gay?

But Luis seemed just as shocked as the rest of the guests.

He stepped out from behind the wall and forced a smile. He
tilted his head, looked back and forth, and sent Jase a
scathing glance.

"C'mon down here, dumpling," Jase repeated with an

animated voice.

As Luis crossed toward him, the room remained silent. No

one applauded and no one offered the slightest hint of
congratulations. The only sounds in the room, other than the
clicking of Luis's heels on the hardwood floor, came from
some of the guests murmuring to each other.

And when Luis walked up to the fireplace and stood beside

him, and he casually put his arm around Luis's waist, the only
sound in the room came from Camp. His head went up and he
yelped twice. He was still sitting on Isabelle's lap and there
was a piece of watercress dangling from the side of his
mouth. When he saw them standing there together, he
jumped off her lap and ran over to be next to them.

There was long moment of silence. Some were gaping at

Jase's arm around Luis, others were staring at the peculiar
little bald dog with watercress hanging from his mouth. And

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then, of all things, the conservative woman politician stepped
forward, lifted her glass, and said, "I think we need
champagne for a toast for these two." Then she set her drink
down on the coffee table and started applauding them.

After that, Mary and Isabelle stood and applauded, too.

Eyes were still bulging and voices were still murmuring, but
eventually the rest of the room followed them with a weak,
disconnected applause. The sound of champagne popping at
the bar caused Camp to snarl and bark. In the distance, the
loud slam of the back door could be heard throughout the
house. Jase figured it was his father storming outside after
Jase's bold announcement.

A few minutes later, when everyone went back to their

conversations and people were sipping champagne, Luis
smiled and tapped Jase on the shoulder. "I'm curious about
something. When did you decide this was the right time to
announce our engagement? Was it before or after I ate the
fishcake? Good thing I didn't go to the bathroom. I would
have missed all the fun."

Jase nodded and smiled, but before he had a chance to

answer, an attractive man with auburn hair and blue eyes
walked up and said, "Jase, it's been a long time." He looked
up at Jase and smiled, then lowered his eyes to the floor.

When Jase saw his old friend Trey Dawson standing there,

he moved away from Luis and reached out to hug him. Jase
hadn't seen him in years, not since that one Christmas Jase
and his ex-wife had spent with the family and Isabelle had
experienced pains in her chest. Trey had driven all the way
over in his Jeep because all their cars had been snowed in

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and the boats were all docked for the winter. Trey had carried
Isabelle out in his arms, and he'd driven her all the way to
the hospital in the worst driving conditions Jase had seen in
years. Thankfully, Isabelle's problem wasn't serious. It was a
gallbladder attack and it just required surgery. But if could
have been much worse, and if it hadn't been for Trey, she
could have died.

Jase stepped back and looked him up and down. "Wow,

how are you? It's been a long time." Trey's family didn't live
far. They'd gone to the same schools. And though Trey was
five years younger than Jase, they'd always shared a special
connection. One evening while they were away at summer
camp, they slept together in the same sleeping bag because
Trey's had become infested with fleas. And in the middle of
the night, while everyone else was sleeping, they woke up
and started kissing. Of course they stopped before anything
else happened. Jase jumped out of the sleeping bag and
spent the rest of the night on a bench. Though neither one of
them ever discussed that night again, they still remained best
friends afterward.

"I'm good," Trey said. When he spoke to Jase, it was as if

no one else was in the room. "How are you?"

"I'm great," Jase said. "I had no idea you'd be here. I

thought you were living in Los Angles now." Trey had become
a pediatrician. He'd moved to Los Angeles years earlier. But
his family still lived up the road.

Trey tilted his head with an awkward twist. He looked

down and said, "Well, your mother invited me. She called and
asked me to come up here for the week, for this party, and

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the anniversary/birthday party. As it happens, I'm starting a
practice up here, so I agreed to come. I love Los Angeles, but
I've been getting homesick for a long time. And I just broke
up with my partner of ten years. It's sort of a starting-over
thing."

"I think it's wonderful," Jase said. "I miss home all the

time." Though Trey had just announced to him he was openly
gay and he'd had a partner for ten years, Jase decided not to
make a comment about it

Luis cleared his throat and coughed. He'd been standing

there on the sidelines, watching them gaze into each other's
eyes.

So Trey faced him and said, "We're being totally rude."
"Ah well," Jase said, reaching for Luis's arm. "This is my,

ah, fiance, Luis." He told Luis, "This is my old, ah, old buddy,
Trey Dawson." He spoke low, with his head down, as if he had
trouble finding the right words to describe Trey. At one time,
he'd thought he was in love with Trey, but because those
feelings had been taboo at the time, he'd placed them as far
back in his mind as he could. And he'd never even considered
Trey might be gay, too. But now that Trey was standing there
with him, telling him he was openly gay and he had been all
along, Jase couldn't help feeling the same strong emotions
he'd always felt when Trey was in the room. But he didn't
want Luis to know this, so he tried too hard to pretend there
was nothing between them.

"It's nice to meet you," Luis said. "Jase never talks about

anyone from his past. The only one I really know anything
about is his ex-wife, and even then I don't know much. And

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he never mentioned he had a gay best friend." He faced Jase;
one eyebrow was higher than the other and his arms were
folded across his chest.

Jase and Trey exchanged awkward glances, as if they were

guilty of something or hiding a secret. Then Trey smiled and
said, "That's because neither one of us knew we were gay.
Or, I should say, accepted the fact we were gay." He looked
at Jase again and smiled. "When you grow up in conservative
households like we did, it takes time, sometimes many years,
to accept who you are and how you want to live your life."

Though Trey was speaking to them both, Jase had a

feeling he was speaking more to him than to Luis. He seemed
to be offering an explanation for his past actions, without
coming out and specifically saying it was an explanation for
his past behavior.

Luis smiled. "I understand completely. I grew up in a small

town in Tennessee. But I was lucky enough to have a gay
uncle." Luis took a quick breath and exhaled. "I lost him to
AIDS last year."

"I'm so sorry," said Trey.
Luis shrugged. "He didn't take care of himself like he

should have. He didn't have health insurance that would
cover the cost of his medications, which went into thousands
of dollars a month, and he refused to go on any kind of
government assistance." He lifted his chin and smiled. His
upper lip quivered. "But at least he lived and died the way he
wanted to, with dignity."

Jase smiled. "We should all be this lucky." He knew Luis

was still mourning his uncle's death. He also knew Luis still

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felt guilty about not being there with him in the end. But
there was nothing Luis could have done to change things.

Before Trey had a chance to say anything, someone

standing beside Jase's mother lifted a glass and said, "Tell us
how Jase proposed."

Luis's eyes opened wide and he reached for Jase's sleeve.
When Jase heard this, he rolled his eyes and raised his

voice. "Maybe another time," he said. "Right now I want to
walk around and talk to everyone. There are so many people
I haven't seen in a long time." He'd proposed to Luis in
Central Park late one night. But it hadn't been conventional.
He'd slipped the diamond ring on Luis's finger while they were
having sex behind a park bench. Though this had been
romantic and significant to them, Jase was more than certain
the rest of the room wouldn't understand, and he didn't feel
like lying about the way he'd proposed to Luis. That day was
too special to him to fake it. There are certain pivotal
moments in every relationship that are not meant to be
shared with anyone, and no one else has a right to go there.

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Six

Luis smiled and shook so many hands he lost track of how

long the party went on. He'd never been good with different
time zones. If he was in New York and someone asked him
what time it was in Los Angeles he'd just shrug and smile. If
someone asked him what time it was in England and they
expected him to know this offhand, he'd laugh in their face
and tell them to go Google it on the Internet. Then he'd tell
them to get a life. There were far more important things to
worry about, and Luis tended to believe it was better to live in
the moment. Only he hadn't set his watch to Alaska time, and
for the life of him he couldn't find a clock anywhere in the
house.

Now he was sorry he hadn't done a little research about

the time difference. When he read Elena's blog he knew what
time it was in France, so it wasn't that he couldn't do it. By
the time the last guest left, he was ready to drop into one of
the living room sofas and sleep for the next three days. The
plane rides alone had exasperated him, and then there was
the boat ride he was certain had given him a few strands of
gray. When he added the stress of the party and meeting
Jase's friends and family all at once, there wasn't enough
coffee in his favorite New York bodega to perk him up.

Jase's father had never returned to the party, but Mary

didn't mention this. She just sort of breezed over things as if
nothing was wrong or out of place. Luis and Jase were
standing around the large island in the kitchen with Mary and

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Isabelle. Camp was already curled up and snoring beneath
the kitchen table when Mary yawned and said, "I think I'm
going upstairs to bed now. The catering staff took care of
most of the cleanup and I can finish up the rest of the
cleaning tomorrow morning." She yawned again and
stretched. "It's been a long day."

After Mary yawned, Luis did, too. He couldn't help himself.

It just came from the back of his throat and through his ears
without any warning. He covered his mouth and apologized.
When Mary saw this, she laughed and said, "My mother-in-
law will take you upstairs to your room. She's a night owl.
She'll be up for another two hours." Then she kissed everyone
and said goodnight.

When Mary was gone, Isabelle slapped her leg and called

for Camp. "We're going up to bed now, little guy." Then she
turned to Jase and said, "After I get you settled I have to feed
and walk Sweetie-Pie."

"Who's Sweetie-Pie?" Luis asked.
"It's my grandmother's poodle," Jase said.
"I keep her downstairs in the game room when we

entertain so no one lets her outside during parties," Isabelle
said. Then she leaned forward and whispered. Her eyes
bugged as if she were about to tell a scary bedtime story.
"She doesn't like everyone. She likes most people. But if she
sees an unusual expression, she starts to growl and snarl at
them. You never know what it's going to take to get her mad.
There's no set pattern. Sometimes it could be just the twitch
of an eyebrow."

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"Does she like other dogs?" Luis asked. He wanted to be

sure Camp wasn't in any danger. Camp got along well with
other dogs because he was used to walking in the park and
being surround by them. But Luis didn't want to expose him
to a vicious little poodle.

"She's a sweetheart," Jase said. "She loves other dogs.

She gets along with the two hunting dogs wonderfully."

"Hunting dogs?" Being from Tennessee, Luis knew a little

about hunting dogs. They tended to be more aggressive and
instinctive then house pets. He worried they might mistake
Camp for a bald fox.

"They were in their pens today," Jase said, "because of the

party. But they usually roam around out back and they are
very friendly. It's all fenced off. They rarely ever come into
the house. They are my father's dogs. He hunts."

Luis wasn't surprised to hear Jase's father was a hunter.

He could just see him now, plucking a baby deer and smiling.
"How are they with other dogs?" Luis asked.

Isabelle reached down and scooped Camp into her arms.

She patted his head and said, "They are fine. They love other
dogs. Camp will love it around here with all these new doggie
friends." Then she turned and started walking toward a back
staircase in the kitchen. "I'll get you three settled upstairs,
then I'll go see to Sweetie-Pie. She's not going to like missing
all the attention today. She's very spoiled."

Jase and Luis followed her upstairs. On the second floor,

she led them down a wide, well-decorated hall to the last
room on the right. While she murmured something to Camp,

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Luis pulled Jase's sleeve and asked, "What time is it?" I feel
as if I've missed an entire day."

Jase looked down at his watch. "It's almost eleven

o'clock."

Luis blinked. "But it's still light outside. I thought it was

more like eight or nine."

"Sundown this time of year is around eleven-thirty," Jase

said. "And sunrise is around four-thirty."

Luis had heard the days were longer in Alaska, but there

had been so much going on he'd forgotten all about it. He
hoped there were some good darkening shades in the room;
he'd forgotten to bring his sleep mask.

When Isabelle led them into the room, she plopped Camp

down on a queen-sized bed and said, "Here you go. All your
luggage is here and if you need any extra blankets, they are
in that large wardrobe over there."

She pointed to a massive antique French armoire. Luis

crossed the room and ran his fingers down the side. "This
room is wonderful. It's filled with so many beautiful antiques."
He wasn't sure where to look first. The carpets were Persian,
the furniture was French, and the lamps and accessories were
either crystal or Asian. There was a long wall of windows at
one end of the room, with an exquisite view of the water,
flanked with heavy beige velvet draperies. "Is this my room,
or Jase's room?" he asked. He'd naturally assumed they
would be sleeping in different rooms, and not because they
were gay. He would have expected separate rooms if they'd
been a straight couple, and he wouldn't have objected either.
He would have respected their wishes.

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Isabelle sent him a naughty smile and laced her fingers

together. "Hell, we aren't fools here. We assume you and Jase
have been sharing the same bed so there's no need to
pretend. You're both grown men, and we're all adults."

Luis nodded and smiled, but he couldn't help wondering

what Jase's father thought about this. This was probably the
reason Mary went to bed and let Isabelle show them to their
room.

Then Isabelle pressed both palms to her chest and stared

at the door. Jase turned and Luis drew back. The biggest,
liveliest white poodle Luis had ever seen pounded into the
room, shaking its head and barking. This dog was even larger
than Ben's and Percy's standard poodle. It was almost the
size of a small pony.

"What are you doing up here, Sweetie-Pie?" Isabelle

asked, pointing to the dog and leaning over to grab its wide
rhinestone collar. She looked at Jase and frowned. "I'll bet
your father is home and he let her out."

Jase crossed toward them and went down on his knees. He

hugged the big dog and kissed it on the snout. "There's my
girl," he said.

Sweetie-Pie licked his face and almost knocked him over.
Poor Camp,. He was sitting on the edge of the bed staring

at the giant dog. Luis almost laughed, but he noticed
something unusual. Camp's swollen tongue was hanging out
and he was panting. His tiny chest heaved, his pupils dilated,
and his eyes had this peculiar glazed-over look. When Luis
went to pick him up and see what was wrong, he jumped off

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the bed, ran up to Sweetie-Pie, and started licking her hind
legs.

Sweetie-Pie's head went up and her tail went so far to the

right it looked as if it disappeared into her hindquarters. Luis
gasped; he'd never seen a dog bend its tail this way.

Then he pressed him palm to his throat and said, "I don't

know what's wrong with Camp. I've never seen him this way.
He looks like he's having some sort of seizure. Maybe he ate
something at the party."

Jase grabbed Camp and stood up. But Camp writhed in his

arms, squirming to get back down on the floor. His tongue
was still hanging from him mouth and he was panting more
than ever.

Isabelle covered her mouth and shrugged. "Don't worry

about him," she said. "I think I know what's wrong. I was
hoping this wouldn't happen for a few weeks. But Sweetie-Pie
is never regular."

Jase laughed and said, "Ah well, poor Sweetie-Pie." He

patted her on the back and she licked his hand.

"What's wrong with her?" Luis asked. He looked at the way

Camp was behaving and said, "Maybe I should call a vet. He's
having some kind of an attack."

"He's fine," Isabelle said. She leaned forward and smiled.

"Sweetie-Pie just got a visit from Aunt Flo."

"A visit from who?"
"She's in heat," Jase said, sending his grandmother a look.

"It's an old expression."

"I'd better get her out of here," Isabelle said. She tugged

on Sweetie-Pie's collar and led her to the door. "It's not as if

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they can do anything with each other. But I think poor old
Camp has had enough excitement for one day."

"Thank you for everything," Luis said, with a light, springy

voice. But he was still gaping at Camp. He'd never seen such
a desperate look in the dog's eyes.

"See you in the morning, Mom-mom," Jase said.
As Isabelle closed the door, she looked into the room and

said, "Just be sure you don't let Sweetie-Pie outside alone. If
those hunting dogs get her, I'll have a litter of mixed breeds
and I don't want any puppies. I've decided that after this
cycle is over, I'm getting her spayed." Then she waved and
said, "Sleep tight."

After that, Jase took a long hot shower. Luis just removed

his clothes and plopped into bed naked. The muscles in his
legs ached, his feet were sore and tender from not wearing
socks all day, and the small of his back pulsed with soreness.
It took a while for Camp to stop panting, but he eventually
went to the foot of the bed, paced around in a few circles, and
found a comfortable spot. By the time Jase came out of the
bathroom, Camp was sleeping and breathing with an even
wheeze.

Jase came into the room wearing a clean pair of boxer

shorts and a towel around his neck and sat on the edge of the
bed. He rubbed his head with the towel to dry his short sandy
hair and yawned. Then he reached back and squeezed Luis's
leg. "I'm tired, but I'm really horny for some reason." His
hand went up and he grabbed Luis's ass. "Why don't you
come over here and sit on my lap?" Then he pulled the covers

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off Luis and stared at his naked body the same way Camp
had just stared at Sweetie-Pie.

Luis reached down and pulled the covers back up to his

neck. His eyes widened and he sent Jase a guilty look. "I
don't feel right about it," he said. "I didn't even bring decent
clothes to sleep in because I thought we'd be in a hotel."

"Just come over and sit on my lap for a minute," Jase said.

"Wrap your legs around my waist and put your head on my
shoulder. You don't even have to do any of the work. I'll just
fuck you and we'll go to bed. Fast and simple."

"It doesn't feel right," Luis said. "Your mother, father, and

grandmother are in the house, not far away, and it feels
creepy for some reason."

"No one can hear us," Jase said. "The walls in this house

are a foot thick and insulated like you wouldn't believe." He
lifted a small remote control from the nightstand and pointed
it toward the expansive window. When he clicked a button,
the thick velvet draperies started closing on their own. Then
he pointed it to a smaller window behind the bed, clicked
again, and a room-darkening shade lowered.

"Thanks," Luis said. "I was wondering how I was going to

sleep with all this light." It wasn't as bright as it had been,
but it was still twilight.

Jase groaned and pulled the covers back. Then he got into

bed and snuggled next to Luis's exhausted body. Luis was on
his side facing the window in a fetal position. Jase wrapped
his arms around him. His erection popped out of his boxer
shorts and he pressed it into Luis's ass as hard as he could.

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He started bucking his hips and dry fucking him with a slow,
even grind. "Did I tell you I love you today?" he asked.

"I just don't want your mother to think we've been fucking

in here," Luis said. "Now be a good boy and close your eyes,
seriously."

"Not until you roll over and let me inside," Jase said.
Luis turned his head and kissed him on the mouth. "You

really want to do this, don't you?"

He nodded and squeezed Luis's nipples. "Oh yeah."
"But what about your father?"
"I don't want to fuck my father. I want to fuck you."
"He already thinks I'm trashy," Luis said. For some reason,

though he rarely cared what other people thought of him, the
reaction from Jase's father made his stomach pull.

"I'm the trashy one," Jase said. "I'm the one who wants to

roll you over and fuck you until you can't see straight. If
anything, I'm the one corrupting you."

Luis took a deep breath and sighed. Though he still felt

awkward about having sex in Jase's family home, he couldn't
deny he was aroused, too. So he relaxed his muscles and
rolled over on his stomach. "We have to be quiet, though. I
don't want anyone to hear us."

Before Luis had a chance to finish the sentence, Jase was

on top of him. He kicked off the covers and mounted his back.
Jase must have brought lube from the bathroom, because it
didn't take long for him to reach between Luis's legs and
grease up Luis's opening. With one fast stab, he was inside
and grinding his hips.

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Luis felt Jase's warm, familiar breath on the back of his

neck. Jase held his wrists and pinned him to the mattress
with force he didn't often use. Luis couldn't move anything
but his legs. So he spread them apart as far as they would
go, lifted his calves, and curled his toes forward.

The bed rocked. Camp jumped off and sprinted to a dark

quiet space beneath a loveseat at the foot of the bed. A few
minutes after that, Jase started bucking faster. Then he bit
the back of Luis's shoulder, slammed into Luis's ass with
three rough pounds, and climaxed.

When he was finished, Jase did what they usually did when

they fucked in this position. He wrapped his arms around
Luis's body, pulled Luis backward, and slowly sat back on his
haunches. And while his dick was still buried deep inside and
Luis was now in an upright position, Luis closed his eyes and
threw his head back. Jase stuck out his tongue and kissed
Luis on the mouth while Luis started jacking his own dick. A
minute or two after that, Luis's body tensed and his tongue
went rigid inside Jase's mouth.

When he finally opened his eyes and looked down, he

frowned when he saw he'd come all over the sheets. Jase was
still inside. He had his large hands on Luis's hips and he was
pushing Luis's body into his cock with such force his hands
burned Luis's skin.

Luis kissed his bicep and said, "That was very nice. But

now you have to let me get up and go to the bathroom. We
should have put a towel down first. I don't want your mother
finding come stains on the sheets." It was bad enough with
Isabelle cleaning come stains out of his twill jacket.

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Jase refused to let go of his hips. "I want to stay inside a

little longer. I like the way it feels. It's so soft and warm and
comfortable."

Luis liked the way it felt, too. He closed his eyes and

started playing with Jase's bicep. Though he loved everything
about sex with Jase, this last part, when they hugged and
kissed each other, was one of his favorite things.

So they remained this way until Jase's dick slipped from

Luis's body on its own. Then Luis went to the bathroom to
clean up. When he returned with two wet, soapy cloths, he
leaned over Jase's body and started wiping between Jase's
legs with one cloth. Jase loved this. He closed his eyes and
spread his legs while Luis washed his dick and balls
thoroughly. "You should do this all the time," Jase said. "I like
it."

"I'm doing it to make sure your dick is clean and doesn't

soil the sheets," Luis said. "But I'll be more than happy to do
it whenever you want. I don't mind." He meant it, too.

He took a little longer than he had to take wiping Jase off.

When he saw the way Jase was almost purring with delight,
he didn't want to stop. Then he blotted the white sheets with
the other clean cloth, patted them dry with a towel, and went
back to the bathroom to rinse both cloths and hang them to
dry.

By the time he returned to the bed, Jase was almost

asleep. He got into bed and snuggled next to Jase. Jase lifted
his arm and wrapped it around his shoulder. When he rested
his cheek on Jase's chest, he smiled and said, "That was nice.
I'm glad you didn't stop asking."

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Without opening his eyes, Jase said, "See, I know what's

best for you."

Luis smiled. "Maybe I can fuck you for the first time while

we're in Alaska."

Jase opened his eyes and blinked. "You really want to fuck

me, don't you?"

Luis shrugged. The truth of it all was Luis wanted to fuck

Jase more than ever now. All through the party Luis knew
everyone thought Jase was the dominant top man and Luis
was the submissive bottom. Normally, it was like this. But
they didn't have to assume it. "Yes," he said. "But only if you
want to do it. It's not something I'd ever force you to do. You
can remain a virgin for the rest of our life if you want. I don't
care."

"But I'm not technically a virgin," Jase said. "I've had sex

with both men and women now."

"Has anyone ever fucked you?" He didn't know how to be

more delicate.

"Ah well, no," Jase said.
"Then you're still a gay virgin," Luis said. He reached down

between Jase's legs and fingered his ass crack. "And this is
virgin territory."

For some reason, Jase thought this was hysterical. He

started laughing and couldn't stop. Then Luis started laughing
with him. When they finally settled down and drifted off to
sleep, Luis was in Jase's arms and they were both still
smiling.

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Chapter Seven

The next morning, Luis felt Jase's hand slid down his torso

in slow motion. Luis was on his back and Jase was on his
stomach, covering half of Luis's body. In bed, they were
inseparable. If Jase didn't have his arms and legs wrapped
about Luis's body, Luis was curled up against him with his leg
slung over Jase's waist. Though Jase tended to snore, Luis
had grown so accustomed to it he had trouble sleeping when
Jase wasn't snoring.

Jase's warm hand rested between Luis's legs and cupped

his balls. He started to squeeze and tug them, pressing his
thumb into the side of Luis's groin. Instinctively, Luis spread
his legs wider and lifted them slowly. Though he was still half
asleep, his erection was flat on his stomach and he was ready
to play again.

When Jase released Luis's balls and lowered his hand to

the bottom of Luis's ass, his index finger and middle finger
slipped inside Luis's body and started probing his hole. Luis's
arms were back behind his head by then. His legs were up
even higher, bent at the knees so Jase could insert both
fingers into his body without having to struggle.

At the same time Jase's fingers entered Luis, he shoved his

tongue into Luis's mouth and started kissing him. Luis
stretched his arms back as far as they would go and grabbed
the headboard. His chin went up; his back arched. When Jase
inserted a third finger and started to slide in and out of Luis's
body faster, Luis let out a soft moan inside Jase's mouth to let

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him know how much he was enjoying this. Luis was hoping
for a long foreplay session. But he could never be sure with
Jase. Sometimes Jase just wanted to get right down to
serious matters and climax. But other times he wanted to lie
in bed, explore Luis's body, and work up slowly to the climax.
Either way, Luis always walked away with a huge smile and
feeling of absolute fullness.

Jase pulled the covers back and pressed his mouth against

the side of Luis's neck: the tender spot that made his body
shiver, the place Jase already knew about from past
experience. He bit and sucked, and continued to probe. Just
when he was about to pull his fingers out of Luis's ass and
climb on top of him to insert his dick, Luis's cell phone rang.

The dog yelped and his little head went up at the foot of

the bed.

Luis pushed Jase's shoulders and said, "I have to get that.

It's my agent. He told me he'd call about the modeling job
with the discount department store chain."

"Let it go to voice mail," Jase said. He was on top of him,

already grinding his hips into Luis's pelvis.

Luis pushed him off and sat up. He squeezed his bicep

gently. "I can't. It's too important. My agent has been trying
to get me this job for a month. I have to know what's going
on." This department store chain could be a huge boost for
Luis's career. It meant print ads and television commercials.
Though it was a discount chain and it was far from high-end
designer merchandise, it paid well and it would give Luis huge
national exposure. Luis wasn't one of those models who cared
about high-end designer clothing and being on the cover of

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trendy magazines. He just wanted to work and get paid so
he'd contribute something to the world and so he'd have his
own money. And he preferred the fact that this discount
department store was marketed toward ordinary people his
age, who were struggling to look good on low budgets,
instead of snobby, haute couture types hawking unrealistic
clothing at exorbitant prices.

"You can call him back in an hour. Let's fuck."
Luis jumped out of bed and started rummaging around for

the phone. He knew he'd placed it somewhere near his
suitcase but the draperies were drawn and the room was still
dark. "I have to get this," he said. "It's probably already
afternoon in New York and I really want to know what's going
on." He had no idea what time it was in New York; just that it
was a big time difference.

Jase reached for the remote and opened the drapes. He

sat up and rubbed his eyes while Luis tripped over a carry-on
bag at the foot of the bed. Then he pointed to the old black
suitcase near the armoire and said, "On top of the suitcase.
Over there. I put it there last night."

Luis wasn't far. He lurched forward and grabbed his phone.

But when he pressed the button and said hello, all he heard
was static and faint traces of his agent's voice. He looked at
Jase and shrugged. "I can't hear anything. There's no
reception." Then he told his agent, "Hold on. Don't hang up."

Jase pointed to the armoire. There was a white terry robe

hanging on the doorknob. "You have to go downstairs, out
back," he said. "There's very little reception in the house."

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Luis mouthed the words "thank you," apologized for

running out, and put on the robe. When he opened the
bedroom door, Camp followed him out to the hall and down
the back steps. He raced through the hall, trying to remember
his way down to the kitchen, with Camp at his heels. On the
way down the back steps, he tried talking through the static
and warbles but he couldn't hear a thing.

When he entered the kitchen Sweetie-Pie was sitting near

the kitchen door that led to the back deck, with her tongue
hanging out and her head perched high. Luis opened the door
and patted the top of Sweetie-Pie's head. Then he ran out the
door, hoping he'd be able to hear well enough to at least have
a quick conversation. But he didn't actually get a decent
connection until he was way outside, in the middle of a vast
grassy area behind the house, between the back deck and the
boat docks. He was in his bare feet; the grass was wet and
cold and it felt as though it was below forty degrees.

"Can you hear me now?" Luis asked, trying to wrap the

short robe around his freezing body. "Did I get the job?"

"I just called to let you know nothing is final yet," his

agent said. "They are considering a blond type, but they
really like you a lot. It's a toss-up right now."

Luis shook his head and ran his fingers through his short

dark hair. "Tell them I'll dye my hair. I'll do anything they
want."

"Just calm down," the agent said. "It looks good. And if

they want you to dye your hair, they won't be shy about
asking you to do it."

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"Will you let me know as soon as you hear something?"

Luis asked. His chest was still pounding from running down
the stairs and he still hadn't caught his breath.

"I'll call as soon as I hear anything," the agent said.
Luis was about to ask him a question about another job for

an auto dealership, but he heard barking and turned to the
back door to see what was wrong. Camp was sitting at the
top step on the deck with a tilted head and an inquisitive
expression. And Sweetie-Pie was standing face first at the
bottom of the deck, off to the side, between two tall shrubs.
There was a large hunting dog on her back bucking his
hindquarters into her hindquarters, and another hunting dog
was behind them, barking and running around in circles.

Luis lifted his arms and ran toward the house to stop

them. "No. Don't do that. You can't do this to me." He
whispered this on the way over, wishing he'd remembered
Sweetie-Pie was in heat. They'd told him not to let her out
and he'd completely forgotten.

By the time he reached poor Sweetie-Pie, the hunting dog

who had been breeding her dismounted, fell to the grass in a
heap, and lay there with his tongue hanging from the side of
his mouth. Sweetie-Pie took two steps back, wiggled her
hindquarters, and did that weird thing again that made her
tail bend sideways. Evidently, she wanted more.

As the second hunting dog tried to mount her, Luis threw

his phone to distract him, and then he reached for a garden
hose next to the deck steps. The cell phone grazed the dog's
paw, but didn't hurt him. The dog stopped moving and looked
back and Luis with an intense glare. Then Luis turned on the

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water and pointed the hose at the dog's face. He'd once heard
the only safe way to break this sort of thing up was to spray
the dog down with a hose, end even then it might not work if
the dog was determined enough.

But Luis got lucky. The dog that was about to mount

Sweetie-Pie wasn't fond of water. He jerked back and turned
in the opposite direction when the water hit him. The other
dog on the ground jumped up fast and followed him when he
felt the water hit his body. They both loped down the back
lawn to a wooded area at the end of the property and
disappeared behind the shed.

Luis turned off the water and lurched for Sweetie-Pie so

she wouldn't get into any more trouble. If he hadn't grabbed
her by the collar when he did, she would have gone tumbling
after the two male dogs with her tail bent sideways and her
swollen tongue flapping.

As it was, Luis knew one of the dogs had mounted

Sweetie-Pie and it was all his fault. If Sweetie-Pie had been
bred with a mongrel hunting dog, Jase's family would never
forgive him. It was already bad enough Jase's father didn't
trust him and Jase's mother and grandmother were only
being polite for Jase's sake. Now they would all hate him, and
blame him for allowing Sweetie-Pie to sneak out the back
door.

He bent down in the grass and rubbed Sweetie-Pie at that

sensitive spot all dogs have just below their ears. He shook
his head and frowned. "You've been a naughty girl. And you
could get me into a lot of trouble for this." But his tone was
airy and light. He couldn't blame the poor dog for this.

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Sweetie-Pie sent him a thankful glance and looked him in

the eye. Then she lifted her right paw, tapped his thigh twice,
and rubbed her curly white head against his chest with an
affectionate groan.

He closed his eyes and smiled. "Ah well, you really are a

naughty girl," he said. "I think you had a little too much fun
today. Let's just hope this was all fun and games and you
won't wind up with puppies." He didn't know much about dog
breeding, but he did know the first time didn't always take.
He remembered back in Tennessee where one guy used to
breed his bitch three times just to be sure it took.

He stood up and walked her back to the house, tugging

Sweetie-Pie forward with gentle pulls. He wiped a drop of
perspiration from his cheek and took a quick disconnected
breath. When he reached the bottom step of the deck, he saw
his phone in the grass. He picked it up and looked it over. The
screen was cracked and it was completely waterlogged. When
he tried to turn it on and pressed it to his ear, there was
nothing, not even static.

Camp yelped and Luis looked up at the back door. Jase

was standing in the doorway with a mug of coffee in his hand.
He was still in his robe, looking down at Luis with furrowed
eyebrows. "You okay? Why are you sweating? It's cool out
here."

Luis released Sweetie-Pie and sent her up the steps so she

could go back inside. "Ah well," he said. "I'm fine, but I'm not
sure about Sweetie-Pie, and my phone is completely ruined."

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Jase opened the screen door and Sweetie-Pie and Camp

ran into the kitchen together. Then Jase walked out and tilted
his head sideways. "What are you talking about?"

Luis told him the entire story. He told him he'd forgotten

all about Sweetie-Pie being in heat and the hunting dogs. He
couldn't keep this a secret and he figured it was best to get it
all out as soon as he could. He'd never lied to Jase before,
and he wasn't going to start now.

Jase put his arm around him and said, "It's not your fault.

Besides, they should have had Sweetie-Pie spayed a long
time ago, especially with two strong healthy studs on the
property. And they should have had the studs neutered, too.
They just keep putting it off and waiting until after her next
heat, and in the meantime the hunting dogs go wild with
frustration twice a year when Sweetie-Pie goes into heat, and
everyone lives in fear Sweetie-Pie is going to get screwed.
Besides, this isn't the first time it's happened."

Luis looked up at him. "It's not?" Jase was a strong

advocate of neutering and spaying. He'd been urging Luis to
have Camp neutered for months. He believed it helped control
the animal population and it helped stop health issues with
dogs as they grew older.

Jase hugged him again. "She once got loose about two

years ago and one

of the dogs screwed her. It didn't take and she didn't get

pregnant. Did they tie this time?"

"I'm not sure," Luis said. He wasn't sure what he meant by

tie, but he assumed he was talking about when dogs get
stuck together after they breed. He almost smiled. He and

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Jase usually tied after they screwed. "I don't think they did.
And I turned the hose on the other one before he had a
chance to mount her."

"Don't worry about it," Jase said. "I'll tell everyone what

happened and I'll blame it on myself." He pressed his fingers
beneath Luis's chin and lifted it. "It's all good."

Luis stepped back. "I can't let you do that. It was my fault.

I should have remembered. If I hadn't been so worried about
my agent, I would have."

"I want to do it," Jase said. "Then I'll go into a long lecture

about the importance of being responsible pet owners,
unnecessary breeding, and why there are so many animals in
the world to rescue." He patted Luis on the back and smiled.
"Now go upstairs and get dressed. You have a long day ahead
of you."

Luis perked up and smiled. "What are we doing?" He

imagined them hiking in the woods, then stopping to make
out in a nest of leaves.

"We're not doing anything," he said. "My mother and

grandmother want to get to know you better and they are
taking you into town for some shopping and lunch. You'll have
fun. You'll get to see the real Alaska."

"Are you coming?" Luis asked. He tightened his lips waiting

for an answer.

"No," he said. "It's just you three. You'll have a blast."
Luis forced a smile. He didn't want to disappoint Jase. But

for some reason this sounded like a day out with the girls,
and Luis wasn't a girl, he was a man. As much as he loved
women and spending time with women, he despised shopping

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just for the sake of shopping and he rarely ever ate lunch.
And with this new modeling job that might happen, he had to
watch his weight even more. When he was working he liked
to be five or ten pounds underweight because the cameras
tended to add at least ten pounds. But he didn't mention this
to Jase, because he didn't want to sound as though he was
complaining. He just picked up his phone and stared down at
it.

"Is there a place in town where I can get this phone

replaced?" he asked.

Jase took the phone from his hand and smiled. "I'm not

sure. You'd better let me just order one. It will be here within
twenty-four hours."

Luis turned and climbed the steps. By the time he reached

the back door, Isabelle was standing there in her robe and
slippers. She laced her fingers together and told Luis she
couldn't wait to get into town and show him around.

Luis smiled, bit the inside of his mouth, and said, "I'm

can't wait either." His tone remained light and breezy.

Jase wasn't far behind. He opened the door for Luis and

Isabelle stepped aside. As Luis crossed to the back stairs to
go up and take a shower, he overheard Jase say, "Mom-mom,
we have to talk about Sweetie-Pie and something that
happened this morning."

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Chapter Eight

When Luis, Isabelle, and Mary took off into town, Jase

called the general store and ordered a new phone for Luis.
Then he went downstairs to the kitchen for another cup of
coffee and saw a note on the island, which read, "See you
later, honey. Your Dad wants to talk to you. He's down at the
docks fishing. Love you, Mom
."

Jase picked up the note and tossed it into the trash can.

He reached for a mug on the counter, poured the last of the
morning coffee, and turned off the coffee maker. After the
way his father had treated Luis at the party, the last thing he
wanted was to listen to more of his father's rants and
complaints. He was too old for this; it made his temper
smolder when he thought about it.

But he also knew no matter how old, how successful, or

how famous he became, he'd still have to deal with his father.
Barry Nicholas wasn't a simple man. He tended to shoot
people down with just one glance; he had ways of controlling
people and smiling at the same time. Jase could divorce his
wife and move on, but he couldn't divorce his father. So he
bit his bottom lip, squared his shoulders, and carried his
coffee mug down to the docks, murmuring to himself the
entire way he wasn't going to argue with his father again.
He'd listen quietly and do what he felt was the right thing to
do.

When he reached the docks, his father was standing at the

edge with a fishing pole, frowning at the tangled wire. The

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two hunting dogs were sleeping in the grass beside his
father's feet.

"I saw a note," Jase said, with a restrained tone. "Mom

said you wanted to see me."

Without looking at him, Barry smiled and adjusted the

fishing rod. "I heard all about what happened to poor
Sweetie-Pie this morning."

Jase frowned. News traveled fast in his family. "I went out

with Camp and totally forgot about Sweetie-Pie being in heat.
By the time I turned around, one of the dogs already had her.
You really should think about getting them all fixed. When
Sweetie-Pie goes into heat, it's not fair to any of them. It's an
accident waiting to happen."

"I've already made an appointment with the vet for next

week," Barry said. "I'm taking the males to be neutered. We'll
just have to wait and see with Sweetie-Pie. If they bred her
and she's pregnant, we'll find good homes for the pups and
then we'll have her spayed. Besides, it might not be such a
bad thing. I'd like to have one of her pups myself. Up until
last year we always had two dogs in the house."

Jase smiled for a moment. He knew his father was talking

about a lab named Brandy. He'd lived to be sixteen years old
and he knew his father missed him. But he didn't feel liked
getting sentimental that morning. His face still flushed with
warmth when he thought about the way his father had
treated Luis the day before. His fist was clenched around the
mug and he didn't even realize it until the mug began to
vibrate.

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So he took a sip of coffee and asked, "What did you want

to see me about?"

Barry tugged on the fishing line. "I just wanted to

apologize for yesterday. I was out of line. I shouldn't have
been so rude to Luis. Your mother was slightly annoyed about
the way I acted." He tugged harder on the line and jerked the
rod a couple of times. "But you can't blame me for being
surprised about all this. First you announce to the entire
world you're gay and you're involved with a male escort half
your age, and then you tell me you're engaged to be married
to him without even so much as a warning. People usually
build up to these things. This isn't exactly something I know
how to deal with. Hell, I was still trying to get used to your
divorce when I turned on the news one night and heard you
were gay. I still need a little time to let all this sink in, son."

Jase frowned. He couldn't blame his father for being

shocked. After all, Jase had been the one who had lied to
everyone, including himself, all those years. He knew it was
going to take time for his father to accept his lifestyle and he
wasn't going to push him.

"I know it's not easy," Jase said. "But right now all I want

is to be civil and friendly. I'm not asking you to do anything
other than that right now."

"It would have been nice if you'd come to us first," Barry

said. "I would have liked it if you'd told us you were gay
instead of running off to New York and disappearing the way
you did." He stopped fumbling with the fishing rod and looked
into Jase's eyes. "I cannot tell you how cheated I felt when I

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heard the news about you on television, of all places. We all
thought you were off on some pilgrimage somewhere."

"I'm sorry," Jase said. "I know it was wrong. But I had to

find out about myself first. Before I could tell anyone, I had to
find out who I was and what I wanted. I never expected it to
go public in such a sensational way. It was all just one big
misunderstanding and there wasn't time to call."

"Evidently," Barry said, then shrugged his shoulders and

released his right hand from the fishing rod. He extended his
arm and said, "The point is, I'm sorry for yesterday. I was out
of line and I was rude."

Jase gazed down at his father's hand for a moment.

Barry's eyebrows were pointed down and he wasn't smiling.
Jase wasn't sure whether or not Barry was being sincere.
Barry could be shrewd this way, as a businessman, a local
political figure, and even as a father. Jase's mother could
have put Barry up to this apology. Barry would do anything to
appease her, even if it meant apologizing to Jase when he
didn't mean it. But Jase reached out and shook his hand
anyway, preferring to assume the positive instead of the
negative. Jase had a feeling his father didn't understand the
choices he'd made in his life and Jase simply didn't know how
to explain them to Barry in one afternoon.

Then Barry turned back to his fishing and said, "I'd like to

talk about something else now that you're here." He smiled,
as if he'd just snagged the largest fish he'd ever caught.

Jase sent him a wary look and frowned. He had a feeling

this was coming. Jase knew his father well enough to know he
didn't apologize to anyone without expecting something in

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return. So he stared out at the water and waited for Barry to
continue, tapping his foot and folding his arms across his
chest. "I've been thinking about retiring completely," he said.
"Maybe spending the winter months at the house in Palm
Beach. I've worked hard all my life. I know I haven't built a
billion-dollar empire like you, but I've built my own small
empire here in Alaska."

Jase picked up another fishing rod and started to play with

the reel. He had a feeling he knew where this conversation
was going and he wasn't sure he wanted to listen.

"But it's not that easy to do," Barry said.
Jase rolled his eyes. "You want me to take over the family

business and move back to Alaska." He stared down at the
grass and exhaled.

"I need you to start taking your family and your

responsibilities seriously."

"When are you going to take me seriously? " Jase said.

This wasn't about Jase being gay anymore. It wasn't about
Luis. This went far deeper. They had been having this
conversation since Jase had been in college.

"You made most of your money selling water and cheese

machines," Barry said. "Give me a break. Water should be
free!"

Jase tossed the fishing rod against a chair. "No, give me a

break. Bottled water is a good business. And Virgin Alaskan
Spring Water has created a lot of jobs up here. I'm a
respected businessman all over the world, and when I come
back here I'm still nothing but that little boy you've always
wanted to control. I'm sorry I never lived up to your

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standards. I'm sorry you didn't have another son who could
fill your shoes. I'm sorry I don't want to move back here and
take over where you left off. But it's just not me."

"But you can run your businesses up here just as easily as

you can in New York or Florida. And you can be gay here in
Alaska just as well as you can be gay anywhere else," Barry
said. "Look at Trey. He's gay and he's moving back to open a
new medical practice."

"This isn't about being gay, Dad. It has nothing to do with

that. My entire life is not defined by me being gay, and I don't
make my decisions based on the fact that I'm gay. You just
don't get it."

"No," Barry said. "I don't get it."
Jase tossed the rest of his coffee on the grass and shook

his head. "I'm happy with my life. I love what I do and I don't
want to change it."

Barry scowled at him and turned slowly to face the water.

"Whatever makes you happy. I guess I have no right to
interfere with your life." Then he looked down at the fishing
rod and started reeling in the line with awkward but
determined jerks.

Jase kicked the chair and said, "That's never stopped you

before." Then he turned his back on his father and headed
back to the house. On the way up, he lifted his right arm and
took a deep breath. "You can keep your apology."

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Nine

When they reached town and climbed out of the boat, Luis

felt like kissing the docks. Mary drove the boat this time, and
she barely went over five miles an hour. Luis learned
something new about boats that morning. The slower they
went, the more seasick a person could get. Though he'd been
terrified the first time Jase had driven the boat to the house,
Jase had driven fast and the boat seemed to glide over the
water. He hadn't experienced a hint of seasickness. But when
Mary drove, putting along, hugging the shoreline all the way
to town, it rocked and jerked and she didn't miss a wave. And
each time the boat went up and down, Luis's stomach went
with it.

Isabelle, bless her ninety—year-old soul, climbed out first

and hooked the boat to the dock with thick ropes. Then she
leaned forward and extended her right arm to help Luis out.
He stood up and wobbled a few times. He pressed his palm to
his stomach and closed his eyes. But she grabbed his hand
and yanked him up with the kind of brute strength he hadn't
expected from a woman her age. Then she slapped him on
the back, smiled, and said, "Don't worry. You just have to get
your sea legs back."

Mary climbed out and looked him up and down. "Are you

okay, Luis?"

Luis nodded and forced a smile. "I'm fine. Just a little

shaky, is all." His legs felt strange, as if they weren't
connected to the rest of his body. And there was a lump in his

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throat so thick he felt like sticking his fingers inside his mouth
and leaning over the boat docks to relieve the tension.

"He'll be fine," Isabelle said. "He probably needs

something to eat." She placed her palm on Luis's back and
said, "How about a nice big stack of pancakes, with lots of
gooey syrup and globs of soft butter? Or maybe some
scrambled eggs, with chunks of goat cheese?"

When she started talking about food, especially the chunks

of goat cheese, Luis grabbed his stomach and swayed to the
right. He reached for the dock post and popped a small breath
mint into his mouth. "I'm good," he said. "I just need to walk
around a little. I'll be fine."

"You sure, honey?" Mary asked.
Luis nodded and smiled. "I'm good, thanks." She looked

nice that day. She was wearing a crisp pair of off-white
slacks, a pale blue camisole, and a beige leather jacket. When
she spoke her tone was always low and calm; her smiles were
sincere and he knew she was asking because she truly cared.
So far, Mary was the one person in Jase's family whom Luis
could identify with. Jase, Isabelle, and Barry were all naturally
aggressive and uninhibited. They stood up, squared their
shoulders, and looked you right in the eye as if they were
daring you to mess with them. But Mary was different. She
seemed to take them all in her stride, confident enough with
her quiet, inner strength to hold her own and maintain a
separate identity. And Luis had a feeling she'd learned to put
up with a lot more than she'd bargained for when she'd
married Barry.

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Isabelle slapped him on the back and snorted. She was

wearing a pale pink sweatshirt with matching pants. "Well,
then, let's get moving. We only have an hour or so to shop
around before lunch. I probably shouldn't say anything, but
we have a special surprise for you at lunch."

"A surprise?" Luis felt a pull in his stomach. He popped

another mint into his mouth and took a quick breath.

Mary glared at her mother-in-law for speaking up too soon.

"It's nothing big. You'll see." Then she looped her arm
through Luis's arm and they slowly walked to the other end of
the dock so Luis could get his balance.

By the time they reached the main street in town, Luis was

walking alone. His stomach had calmed down by then and the
lump in his throat was disappearing. He stopped at a corner
and looked around. He took a deep breath and raised his
eyebrows. "This place is so beautiful. And the air is so fresh
and crisp. After living in New York for so long, I'm not sure
my lungs will be able to stand it. I've never been a fan of hot
weather. It's probably in the nineties back in New York right
now, and here it feels like fifty."

Mary smiled and said, "I guess I take it for granted

because I'm here all the time. But you're right, it is beautiful."
As she finished her sentence she looked up at the blue sky
and squinted.

"Let go to Cleary's first," Isabelle said. "I want to pick up

something for poor Sweetie-Pie. After what happened to her
this morning, I should get her a special treat. We'll get
something for Camp, too."

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He knew Jase had told her about Sweetie-Pie, but she

hadn't mentioned anything yet. But he couldn't just ignore it,
so he smiled and asked, "Is Sweetie-Pie okay now?" He still
felt guilty about letting Jase take the blame.

Mary covered her lips and laughed.
Isabelle shrugged and said, "Are you kidding? I've never

seen my Sweetie-Pie so happy. She's fine. She literally
walked across the kitchen this morning on her hind legs she
was so happy. And I'll bet that horny old hunting dog is
smiling, too." She frowned and shook her head. "It's my own
fault for not getting her spayed a long time ago. I should
have listened to Jase."

"It'll be okay, Mom," Mary said, grabbing her mother-in-

law by the elbow. "Let's go pick up some treats for all the
dogs. I'm sure even the hunting dogs deserve something
special for a change." Then she smiled and winked at Luis.

All through town, Mary and Isabelle nodded and said good

morning to people they passed on the sidewalk. A few times
they stopped and chatted while Luis stepped back and looked
around at the unfamiliar surroundings. Being here had a
special feeling all its own. It wasn't like being in a small town
in upstate New York or back in Tennessee. Though all the
buildings were old and slightly off center, with uneven door
frames and sloping front steps, everything was well kept and
extremely clean. Even the buildings with chipped paint and
crooked shutters had an authentic appeal that made Luis
smile. One tiny used furniture shop had two old rocking chairs
out front with for sale signs taped to their backs. The chairs
had been painted white a long time ago and the paint had

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aged and chipped with time. They were selling for twenty-five
dollars each, which made Luis look twice to be sure. He'd
seen chairs just like them in an antique shop in New York
selling for five hundred dollars each. He'd watched a woman
wearing beige slacks and a navy blue blazer buy them both
and ask the store clerk to deliver them to her Connecticut
address.

Luis also noticed more than a few attractive men in town,

and the one huge difference he had noticed about Alaskan
men compared to New York men was how large they were.
They all had broad shoulders and thick necks. Their legs were
long and it looked as if they all wore size fourteen shoes.
Some of them had hands the size of large iron skillets. He
passed one strapping young man with a crotch that bulged
forward in such an obnoxious way it looked as if he'd stuffed
a grapefruit down his pants and his zipper was ready to pop
open. Luis turned his head fast. He didn't want anyone to
know he was checking out bulges. But if this guy's dick was
anything like the size of his massive hands, he was making
some woman very happy.

In Cleary's pet store, they bought a few packages of

doggie treats and a new rhinestone collar for Sweetie-Pie
(Isabelle said her neck might swell if she was pregnant). Then
they crossed the street to a small gift shop and Mary
purchased a new wreath made out of dried flowers and blue
silk ribbons. She told Luis it was for the side door on the
boathouse, because she thought it looked too bland. Isabelle
thought she was wasting her money on "frivolous notions,"
but Mary just smiled and ignored her. From there, they

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walked to the other end of town so Isabelle could place a new
book on reserve at the town library. The library was nothing
more than a small red clapboard building with bright white
trim. But all the latest books were on display, and the one
written by the woman politician at the party had a table all its
own.

By noontime, they walked back toward the docks and

stopped in front of a long, flat wooden building with a sign
that read, "Dawson's." The wooden siding had been left
unpainted and it had aged into dull, dishwater gray. The red
tin roof had buckled over the years and the outside lamps
were all crooked. It appeared to be a restaurant, but Luis
couldn't be sure because the windows were all dark. It
reminded Luis of a gay bar back in Tennessee on the edge of
town where so-called straight guys used to sneak out on their
wives for quick blow jobs.

Isabelle rubbed her palms together and said, "Here we are.

I've been looking forward to this all morning. We're gonna see
some hot stuff today!" Her pupils were dilated, and she
rocked back and forth in her white running shoes.

Mary sighed. "Just don't get too excited, Mom. The last

time we did this you almost fell and broke a hip. I don't want
to spend the rest of the day in the emergency room." She
smiled at Luis, but her tone was exasperated.

Isabelle raised one eyebrow and smirked. "I'm a grown

woman. I know how to behave, thank you. And for your
information, I was talking about the fact that I'm starved, not
the surprise we have planned for Luis." Then she poked Luis
in the ribs and giggled.

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He looked to Mary for help and she just sent him a hapless

glance with half-closed eyelids.

When they entered Dawson's, Luis noticed a long bar at

one end of the room and tables scattered around it. The main
room wasn't very large and the tables were so close together
you had to squeeze through chairs to get around. The walls
were dark pine, the windows were covered with dark shades,
and the lights were dim. Almost every table was filled with
women of all ages in groups of four to six. As they passed the
bar, Mary and Isabelle stopped to say hello to a young man
sitting on a stool at the far end. Other than a few employees,
he and Luis seemed to be the only men in the place.

"Long time no see," Mary said. She leaned forward and

kissed him on the cheek.

Luis recognized the man. It was Trey, Jase's old friend

from the party. He was wearing a tight black shirt and tight
low-rise jeans. Though he'd moved back to Alaska for good,
Trey still dressed as if he were living in Los Angeles. Though
weren't many men in Dawson's that afternoon, Trey stood out
from the other men there. He was thinner and more toned
than the other guys. He had a slicker hair cut and a sharper
look in his eyes.

Trey stood up and kissed Mary and Isabelle on the cheek.

He smiled at Luis and said, "Nice to see you again."

"Nice to see you, too," Luis said. His instincts kicked in—he

had to be cautious with this one.

"Trey's family owns this place," Mary said. "It has the best

food in Alaska."

Luis smiled. "I'm looking forward to it."

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"Would you like to join us at our table?" Mary asked Trey.

"It's only the three of us."

He shook his head and said, "I'll be over later. I'd rather

sit in the background for these shows." Then he patted Luis
on the back and laughed.

The lights went dim and Isabelle grabbed Mary's arm. "We

have to get our table. The show is starting and I don't want to
miss anything."

Luis looked at Trey for help. "The show?"
Trey gave him a gentle push forward. "You'll see."
Luis and Mary followed Isabelle to a round table at the

back of the restaurant near a small makeshift stage. Mary
almost had to jog to keep up with her. She looked back at
Luis and said, "I hope this wasn't a bad idea. My mother-in-
law tends to get a little too excited about these events."

Luis just smiled and followed them to the table. He had no

idea what event she was talking about. But when he saw the
bleary, befuddled expression on Isabelle's face as she lurched
toward the table, he had a feeling he wasn't going to like it.

They were only seated at the table for three or four

minutes when an unseen voice from back stage said, "Now,
here he is, Alaska's very own Chip N. Dale." Sultry music
started to play; a red light flashed a small wooden stool on
the stage. And while the women in the room applauded, a
small dark-haired man wearing nothing but a black vest,
heavy black boots, and a skimpy black bathing suit jumped
onto the stage.

Luis sat back in his seat and gaped at the dancer. He

looked like the guy Luis had seen working at the boat docks

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earlier but he wasn't sure. The guy couldn't have been taller
than five feet, six inches; his waist had to be at least thirty-
six inches around. And his chest had that sunken look some
men get when they reach their mid-forties. Though his legs
weren't too bad, his calves were stippled with uneven patches
of curly black fuzz.

Luis leaned into Mary's side. "What is this?" He felt as if

he'd been transported into a surreal black and white Felinni
movie.

Mary was applauding and laughing with all the other

women in the room. "It's our monthly male stripper show,"
she said. "We thought you'd enjoy it. Since you and Jase are
engaged to be married, it's kind of like an informal
bachelorette party, with a real live male stripper. We wanted
to surprise you!"

Luis blinked. He wondered why they would think he'd want

to see a male strip show with them. And why did they think
he was the bachelorette instead of the bachelor? Though it
was nice of them—not to mention open-minded and
adorable—to go out of their way like this, he couldn't help
feeling slightly insulted. He wasn't a woman, yet they were
treating him as if he were Jase's bride-to-be instead of his
husband-to-be.

Isabelle slapped Luis's thigh and said, "Isn't this fun? Look

at what's hanging between his legs."

"Ah well, it's fun, all right," Luis said, forcing a smile,

wishing he could sink into the seat and disappear under the
table. He was trying hard to avoid what was hanging between
the stripper's legs. It gave new meaning to the term junk.

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"I'm glad you're having fun," Isabelle said, "Because he

does two shows today. After this one, we'll have lunch. Then
we'll stay for the second show. I heard he might even show
us some pubic hair."

Mary tapped Isabelle's arm. "Mom. Be good."
Isabelle waved her hand. "Screw that. I'm an old broad

and I want to have fun. Right, Luis?"

Luis pressed his lips together and grinned, then nodded as

if he couldn't wait to see more. But by the time they ordered
lunch and drinks, he was ready to run outside, jump off the
dock, and swim back to Anchorage. Mary ordered a very
ladylike cocktail with a pink umbrella and a large red cherry.
But Isabelle smacked her lips and ordered bourbon with a
beer chaser. When Luis heard that, he didn't have a problem
ordering a double vodka on the rocks. He'd been planning to
play it cool and sip on ginger ale. But this called for
something stronger.

The food—he ordered a turkey sandwich on whole wheat

bread—wasn't bad, and the drink calmed his nerves for a
while. But when the music started again and all the women
stood up and shouted for the stripper, Luis tugged on Mary's
arm and said, "I'll be right back. I'm just going out for some
air." Then he smiled, stood up before Isabelle had a chance to
ask where he was going, and headed for the main door.

When he stepped outside, he took a deep breath and

exhaled. He crossed to a wooden railing that faced the water
and leaned into it with his elbows. His ears were ringing; he
could still hear the pounding beats from the song the stripper
was dancing to behind the flimsy wooden walls.

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A moment later, the door opened and Trey came out on

the dock to join him. He crossed to where Luis was standing
and said, "How are you holding up? I saw you leave."

Luis smiled. "I'm good. I didn't expect all this today,

though. For some reason Mary and Isabelle think of me as
Jase's future wife. They actually told me this is sort of a
bachelorette party for me."

Trey looked out at the water and laughed. "They mean

well."

"Oh, don't get me wrong," Luis said. "I love them both and

I do understand. They are adorable. This is all knew to them
and they are going out of their way to treat me like a member
of the family. I just wish they weren't treating me like a
woman." He shrugged. "It's kind of awkward. They don't treat
Jase that way."

Trey looked down at his shoes. He seemed to have trouble

looking directly into Luis's eyes. "Give them time," he said.
"Jase has always been the big strong macho guy in the
family. He was a star football player, he was captain of the
wrestling team, and he had more girlfriends in high school
than anyone I ever knew. When they see you, they think of
Jase as the man in the relationship and they think of you as
the woman."

"But it doesn't work like that," Luis said. "We're both

men." Though he was starting to wonder about this himself.
Jase hadn't mentioned all the girlfriends he'd had in high
school.

"I know that," Trey said, "and you know that. But you're

going to have to show them. They'll get it in time. You'll see."

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"I hope you're right," Luis said. "I'm just glad they didn't

make me put on a mock wedding veil and sit on the stripper's
lap."

"I guess Alaska is very different from New York," Trey

said. He wasn't looking at Luis.

"Ah well, yes it is. But I'm not a total city boy. I'm from

Tennessee." He felt the need to explain this, so Trey didn't
think he'd grown up with taxi cabs and subways at his
disposal. The place where he'd grown up in Tennessee was far
more remote than this town and he wanted them all to know
it.

"I wouldn't have guessed," Trey said. "You seen so

sophisticated."

"Have you been to New York?"
"No," Trey said. "My ex-partner didn't like to fly, so we

never left Los Angeles."

A couple of seagulls squawked and a large fishing boat

honked its horn. Then Luis smiled and said, "You and Jase
were good friends." He was curious. He wanted to know more
about their past.

"We were inseparable," Trey said. He folded his hands on

the rail and smiled. "He was like the older brother I never
had."

"But you're both gay and neither one of you knew it

growing up?"

"At the time we weren't sure we were gay," Trey said,

shrugging his shoulders. "But looking back I guess you could
say we were in a relationship and never realized it."

Luis was curious; he had to ask. "Did you fool around?"

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Trey shook his head left to right. "Never," he said. "If

anything, we made sure we were never too close to each
other. Even though I knew I was attracted to Jase, I was too
young and too terrified of being rejected by Jase to make any
moves on him. And he was too moral to make any moves on
me. I was five years younger than him. He treated me like
this delicate breakable object all the time. He was probably
afraid of corrupting me and scarring me for life. Little did he
know." He laughed and rubbed his jaw.

Luis smiled. "That's Jase, all right. He's the most ethical

and moral man I've ever known. The last of the real
gentlemen."

Another moment of awkward silence passed; a man

shouted something in the distance. Then Luis asked, "I'm
surprised nothing at all ever happened."

Trey rubbed his jaw and cleared his throat. "When Jase

graduated from college with his graduate degree he had this
weird pipe dream about the two of us moving to Los Angeles
together. At the time we were going as friends, not lovers.
There wasn't anything sexual about it and certainly no talk
about living together as a gay couple. He practically begged
me to go to L.A. with him."

"You said no."
"I was too young," Trey said. "I'd never known anything

but this small town and Alaska. And I was terrified of the
feelings I had for him. It was overwhelming. On the one hand
I wanted him so much my body ached. On the other, I was
terrified to cross the line and tell him how I really felt."

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Luis frowned. It sounded as if Trey was still in love with

Jase. "I see."

"I eventually wound up moving to L.A. alone, where I went

to medical school," Trey said. "When Jase got married and
moved away, it made me feel closer to him to be in L.A. for
some reason. Sounds silly, I know. We never actually went to
L.A. together. It was just a pipedream. I eventually met the
man who is now my ex-partner, Mark, and here I am again
right back where I started almost twenty years later. Life is
interesting sometimes. You just never know."

"Tell me about it," Luis said. Here he was in Alaska, of all

places, this quiet kid from Tennessee who had been kicked
out of his house because he was gay. He never would have
imagined this while he'd been growing up.

"But it's all good," Trey said. "Things usually work out just

the way they are supposed to work out. It wasn't meant to be
for Jase and me. Wrong time, wrong place."

Now Luis was certain Trey was still in love with Jase. It

wasn't anything he said. It was the way he said it. When he
mentioned Jase's name, his eyes widened and gazed at the
water with a soft smile. When he talked about his past with
Jase, his voice became low and affectionate, as if he were re-
living all the old memories at that moment. When he
mentioned the fact that Jase had wanted to move to L.A. with
him, the hint of regret and sadness in his voice was
unmistakable. He had to clear his throat to keep from
choking.

"Life is full of surprises," Luis said. He didn't know what

else to say. He certainly wasn't going to console him.

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Then Trey tapped the rail with both hands and squared his

shoulders. "Well, congratulations. You're very lucky. You're
going to marry the most wonderful man I've ever known.
You're going to be very happy with Jase."

"I know," Luis said. "He's the best."
After a pause, Trey excused himself and went back into

the bar. Luis remained outside for a few more minutes and
stared into the ocean. He couldn't help thinking about how
much Trey still loved Jase, and he couldn't help wondering
about whether or not Jase still had feelings for Trey. Trey was
definitely an attractive man. But more than that, he was
decent and kind and thoughtful. Though he'd lived in L.A. for
a long time, he still hadn't lost his innocence. It was as if he'd
taken it with him from Alaska, placed it in a safe box for
keeping, and pulled it back out again when it was time to go
back home. Luis wasn't sure he could compete with this, or if
he was even capable of competing with this.

So he turned around and went back into the bar. He didn't

want Isabelle and Mary wondering what had happened to
him. As the male stripper finished the show and Isabelle ran
up to shove dollar bills into his black bathing suit, Luis
decided he'd remain silent for the next few days and watch
Jase carefully. He wanted to know if Jase was as much in love
with Trey as Trey was with Jase. There was nothing Luis
wouldn't do to make Jase happy, and if it meant stepping
aside so Jase could be with the love of his youth, Luis do it
without asking any questions.

When they returned to the house, it was close to four in

the afternoon. Luis finally felt comfortable enough with Mary

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and Isabelle to laugh and joke around about the male
stripper. As it turned out, Mary and Isabelle knew the stripper
wasn't all that great looking. They told Luis they enjoyed the
strip show because it was more about having naughty fun
with a bunch of other women than watching a man get naked.
Oddly enough, Luis understood this completely. And when he
reflected on the afternoon, it occurred to him he'd enjoyed
himself for the very same reasons.

But on the way up to the house, they heard loud slams

and heavy cracks. When Luis looked up, he saw Jase swinging
some sort of large hammer or ax.

"Oh no," Mary said. "Something must be wrong."
"Wrong?" Luis asked.
Isabelle took his arm and said, "Don't worry. Just leave

Jase alone when he's in this mood. He'll be fine. He's working
on an old invention he never actually finished. It's some kind
of unsinkable kayak that has been frustrating him for years."

Luis nodded and smiled. Jase had never mentioned this to

him.

When they passed Jase, he was still swinging the tool

against the unfinished kayak. He was wearing earphones so
he couldn't hear anything they said. But Luis couldn't help
notice the determined, frustrated look in Jase's eyes. He
thought he'd seen all of Jase's moods. But he'd never seen
this in New York.

When they went inside the house, Isabelle said she was

going to take care of Camp and Sweetie-Pie and she
disappeared somewhere in the back of the house. Mary
placed her bags on the center island and put her hands on

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her hips. She left Luis standing there alone and crossed into
the family room where Barry was watching television.

"What's going on?" Mary asked. Her tone was serious, and

she placed her hands on her hips.

Luis couldn't actually see Barry's face, but he could hear

him speak. "I don't know what you're talking about," Barry
said, with a soft innocent tone.

"Jase is outside slamming away at the old kayak," Mary

said. "He only does that when you've done something. I only
get to see my son once a year now, and you have to ruin it
when he does come home. I'm tired of this, Barry. We're
going to wind up all alone in this big house one day if you
keep this up."

When Luis heard Mary's tone become sharp and serious,

he decided it was time to excuse himself and go upstairs. So
he poked his head into the family room and said, "I'm going
upstairs now. I'm exhausted. I think I might take a nap. I just
wanted to thank you for a wonderful day. I had a good time."

Mary smiled and nodded. Both hands were still glued to

her hips and she wasn't backing down. As Luis turned to
leave, he heard her ask Barry, "What did you do to him?"

"I had a quiet little conversation with him about his

future," Barry said.

Luis stopped walking. This was getting interesting.
"Oh, I'm sure it was quiet," Mary said. "How dare you do

this, Barry? He's my son, too. And thanks to you, I never get
to see him."

As Mary continued to rant about the way Barry pressured

and frustrated Jase, Sweetie-Pie galloped into the kitchen and

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started barking at Luis. He didn't want them to know he'd
been eavesdropping, so he lifted his hand and told her to be
quiet.

But Sweetie-Pie continued to bark, so he was forced to

leave before they finished arguing. Evidently, Jase had
forgotten to mention a few things about his life in Alaska. Luis
had imagined a quick trip home, meet the family, then back
to New York. He had no idea Jase's father was this controlling
monster who wanted to run Jase's life, he had no idea he'd be
meeting Jase's first love, and he never could have portended
his perfect life with Jase could have become so complicated in
just a couple of days.

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Chapter Ten

When Luis went upstairs, he decided to take a long hot

shower. Although it had warmed up a little outside, his body
still wasn't acclimated to summertime in Alaska and he
figured a hot shower would help warm him up. Even though
he was wearing his twill jacket (Isabelle had managed to
remove all the come stains on the shoulder), his hands were
cold and he couldn't seem to get warm no matter how hard
he tried.

Sweetie-Pie followed him all the way to his room, barking

and banging into his back legs with the top of her head. Camp
wasn't far behind her. He trailed after Sweetie-Pie, yelping
and jumping, with his eyes glazed over and his tongue
hanging from the side of his mouth. It was as if he'd gone
berserk and nothing could calm him.

Luis had to crack the door of his room and slip through

sideways so Sweetie-Pie wouldn't follow him inside. He tried
to get Camp to come inside with him, but Camp refused to
leave Sweetie-Pie alone. So Luis slid down the door frame and
scooped Camp up in his arms while Sweetie-Pie licked his face
with her wet tongue. Though he knew it was impossible for
them to breed—Camp was smaller than one of her front
legs—it didn't seem fair to leave them alone together.
Sweetie-Pie had a good disposition. She seemed to tolerate
Camp's natural obsession without snarling or snapping at him
aggressively. When he went too close to her hindquarters and
crossed the invisible line, she'd politely turn and give him a

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warning bark that said she wanted to be left alone. He'd back
off for a moment, but then he'd go right back, eyes glazed
and tongue hanging, and the entire ritual would begin again.

When they were finally inside the bedroom, Luis promised

Sweetie-Pie he'd play with her later. Then he shut the door,
leaned his back against it, and sighed. He looked down at
Camp and frowned. "When we get back to New York, you're
going to the vet to get neutered, you horny little thing. I
should have done it a long time ago for your own good." Then
he put Camp down on the floor and watched him scamper to
the loveseat at the foot of the bed, where he would sit and
sulk for the rest of the afternoon.

First, Luis turned on the shower and let it get steaming

hot. Then he went back into the bedroom and removed all his
clothes. When he pulled off his socks, he was amazed at how
cold the hardwood floors were. And when he walked back into
the bathroom and the soles of his bare feet hit the icy tiles,
his balls literally jumped up into his scrotum. How did these
people manage in January?

But the hot water warmed his body fast. The second he

stepped into the shower the steam opened his lungs and his
sinuses. He wasn't in there longer than four or five minutes
when he heard a tap on the glass shower door and Jase's
voice saying, "I'm coming in to join you."

Luis stepped back and leaned into the wet tiles while Jase

removed his clothes and tossed them in a heap on the
bathroom floor. He knew Jase would warm him up faster than
the hot water. Besides, this was a nice surprise. Luis hadn't

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expected Jase to stop hammering his kayak and come
upstairs so soon, but he wasn't going to complain.

When Jase walked into the shower, Luis spread his legs a

little and smiled. He rotated his hips male-stripper style and
his dick swung back and forth. As Jase approached, Luis
reached up with both arms and laced his fingers at the back
of Jase's neck, then lifted his right leg and rubbed it up and
down against Jase's thigh.

Jase kissed him and asked, "Did you have fun today with

my mother and grandmother?"

Luis nodded. He closed his eyes and rested his head on

Jase's chest. "They were very nice. They treated me like an
old friend." Then he gave Jase a fast description of the cheesy
male strip show and how they treated him more like a future
daughter-in-law than a future son-in-law.

Jase laughed and rubbed his ass. "They don't get the

concept of us as a gay couple yet," he said. "They think of
you as the woman in the relationship, and they think of me as
the man."

Luis gazed up at him. "Do you think of me that way?" Now

he was curious. They'd never discussed this. Luis had always
thought of them both as men. But after he'd heard about all
the girlfriends Jase had in the past he wasn't so sure
anymore.

"No way," Jase said. "I'm with you and I'm in love with you

because you are a man." He rubbed the small of Luis's back
and said, "I'm sorry you had to feel that way. Maybe I should
have a talk with them."

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"No," Luis said. "Please don't. They were fine. I don't want

them getting insulted. It will be okay. I'm sure they'll
eventually understand our relationship, and how it's not
based on who is playing the role of the man and who is
playing the role of the woman. I blame this all on TV and that
handful of gay guys who have shows on those out-of-the-way
cable channels."

"I don't understand."
"Your mother and grandmother can't be blamed for their

impressions of gay men when the only gay men they've
probably ever been exposed to were the outrageous types on
TV. Not that there's anything wrong with being different. You
know I'm not like that. Everyone is an individual and
everyone is equal. And you know how I hate labels. It's just
that straight people think we're all that way. They think we're
all just ready to dangle our wrists and fly into the air. I think I
have a lot more showing to do with your family than telling if
they are ever going to really get to know me and understand
I'm not a woman, I'm a man."

"You sure?" Jase said. "Because I can have a talk with

them. I don't mind. They're cool about things like this."

"I'm sure," Luis said. Then he reached down, cupped Jase's

balls, and squeezed them gently.

But Jase stepped back and said, "Turn around and face the

tiles. You're always the one pleasing me. I want to please you
for a change. All you have to do is just stand there and close
your eyes. I don't want you to move a muscle."

While Luis turned and leaned into the tiles, Jase reached

for a bar of oatmeal soap and rubbed it between his palms

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until they were lathered with cream-colored suds. Then he
reached up and rubbed his hands all over Luis's shoulders.
After that, his hands went down slowly, taking his time and
making sure every square inch of Luis was covered with suds.
When he arrived at the lower half of Luis's body, he went
down on his knees and started lathering Luis's legs. Luis
spread his arms and legs apart and stood on his toes. He
leaned into the wall with an exaggerated arch in his back. He
rested his left cheek on a wet tile while his mouth hung half
open, and started moaning out loud. He shivered when Jase
lathered the soft spots of his inner thighs. His body jerked
when Jase went all the way up and lathered between his legs.

The only part of Luis's body Jase didn't lather was his ass,

which was the place Luis wanted lathered the most. He didn't
mention this aloud, but he did arch his back and push his ass
out farther than normal so Jase would get the hint. He even
wiggled it a few times, hoping Jase would rub the bar of soap
up and down his ass crack, then insert his finger. If he'd had
a tail like Sweetie-Pie's, he would have bent it sideways so
Jase could mount him.

But Jase had other ideas. When he finally put the soap

back in the shelf above his head, he placed both palms on
Luis's ass and he spread Luis's ass rounds apart as far as they
would go. He stretched them so hard Luis lurched forward.
Then, while Luis stood there on his toes, with his legs spread
wide and his palms pressed to the tiles for support, Jase
buried his face in Luis's ass and started licking. He chewed
and nibbled; his jaw moved up and down fast. When Jase
finally inserted his tongue into Luis's body, the stubble from

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his rough beard against Luis's soft flesh made Luis inhale so
abruptly it felt like a cross between a hiccup, a gag, and a
sigh.

While Luis moaned, Jase's tongue continued to probe. Jase

forced it in as deeply as he could and pinned Luis's pelvis to
the tile. They remained this way for a long time, and Jase
picked up a steady rhythm, poking him with his tongue for so
long Luis was worried they might run out of hot water. But he
worried for no reason, because when Jase was finally finished
rimming him he stood up fast and shoved his dick into Luis's
body before Luis even knew what was happening. Then Luis
lost track of everything. His eyes rolled to the back of his
head and his entire body stiffened. Jase grabbed his hips and
started bucking so fast and slamming with such force Luis had
to reach for a towel bar to keep his balance.

Jase knew how much Luis could take and he wasn't holding

back. His balls smacked against Luis's ass with loud cracks.
Luis bit his lip and took it all without wavering. While the hot
water trickled down their backs, Luis grunted each time Jase
went deep. Luis was more sensitive this time because they
hadn't used any lube. But there was no pain at all. It was
rougher without lube; it didn't just slide in and out of his body
with ease. But Jase had opened him up well and prepared him
for what he was receiving.

There was a mild friction, a roughness that caused Luis's

climax to start building in the lips of his anus. The harder Jase
pushed and the deeper he went, the more intense Luis's
impending climax became. Luis's balls tightened and his cock
jerked on its own. He felt as if he'd become invisible and

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disconnected to the rest of the world; his eyes glazed and
everything seemed to go blank. When they both finally
climaxed together, Luis only had to touch his own erection
and stroke it a couple of times to explode all over the shower
wall.

Jase didn't pull out fast. He remained inside until his

erection subsided. He pinned Luis to the wall and lifted him
up off his feet. "Your ass tasted sweet."

"You always say that when you rim me. I'm starting to

think it's just a line you're using on me."

"It's true," Jase said. "When I'm rimming you, it reminds

me of moon pie."

"Moon pie?" He laughed. "That's disgusting." Luis loved to

get rimmed, but he wasn't big on doing it. He had done it to
Jase a number of times, but not for long and only because
he'd wanted to please Jase the same way Jase had pleased
him. Though licking ass wasn't what he'd call repulsive, Luis
certainly wouldn't have compared it to eating moon pies. If
anything, it was more like licking cheese rinds. But he wasn't
going to say that aloud to Jase and ruin the moment. This
was one of those polar differences between them that made
their relationship work: Jase loved the taste of ass, Luis
didn't.

Jase slapped his ass. "It's not disgusting. It's tasty, just

like candy." He grabbed Luis's ass and squeezed harder. "One
of these days I'm going to get a box of moon pies and shove
them up there, crunch them up, and then eat every last
crumb between your legs."

* * * *

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Later that evening during dinner, it didn't help the

strained, awkward conversation between Jase and his father
when Isabelle announced she'd baked homemade chocolate-
covered moon pies for dessert. She put her hands on her hips
and announced this was her specialty and one of Jase's all-
time favorite desserts. Luis blinked and Jase stared down at
his napkin and smiled. Neither of them exchanged a glance.
But when Luis took a quick glimpse of Jase eating his moon
pie a few minutes later, with white marshmallow frosting
sticking to his bottom lip, he covered his mouth with his
napkin so no one would see him grinning.

After dinner, Jase's father excused himself and said he was

going for a long walk with the hunting dogs. He just put his
hands into his pockets and walked out of the room while
Jase's mother frowned at his back. The rest of them helped
Isabelle clean up, then they went into the family room to
watch a movie Jase's mother had rented about gay marriage.
It was one of those serious documentaries that seemed to be
more about noisy politics and practical matters than love and
romance between same-sex couples. Though Luis was
touched that Mary would rent a film like this just for them, he
kept twitching and turning in his chair all through the film
while he waited for it to end.

The people in the film weren't like most of the gay people

Luis and Jase were close with. They weren't like Ben and
Percy: two normal, average-looking older men who wore
button-down shirts and khaki slacks, and they weren't like
any of their other gay friends in New York either. Most of the

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gay couples Luis and Jase knew, men or women, didn't look
gay. As a matter of fact, Luis had a straight friend who was a
male model who looked more like the standard gay
stereotypes than Luis or Jase did.

Luis despised stereotypes to the point where he often

thought about them more than he should have. When he'd
first moved into Jase's apartment in Trump Tower and they
were an official couple, Luis politely offered a suggestion to
Jase about his hair. Jase had thick sandy-colored hair, but
some dizzy gay hairdresser in Florida had talked him into
getting one of those extremely short haircuts with a turned-
up wave and streaks of platinum blond. Though Jase had the
face for short hair—unfortunately, most guys, gay or straight,
don't—it looked too cliche, as if Jase had been trying too hard
to be gay. When Luis cautiously suggested Jase's hair might
look better if Jase let it grow a little longer, lose the turned-
up wave above his forehead, and let the blond streaks grow
out, Jase took a deep breath and thanked him. He told Luis
the only reason he'd listened to the hairdresser was because
he wanted to fit in with gay men. What did he know about
hair? He hadn't been sure how to fit into the gay world and
he'd thought getting the right look would help. Then he
promised Luis he wouldn't go back to his former look either,
the one where his hair reached his shoulders and he didn't
shave for weeks at a time.

While they watched the documentary, Luis wanted to

explain to Mary and Isabelle that although the entire lgbt
community was fighting together for legalized same-sex
marriage and equal rights and they were all eager to support

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each other, not all gay people were like the people in this
documentary. But Luis just sat back and watched, sending
Jase the occasional eye roll, with his arms folded across his
chest, wondering why gay men like he and Jase were never
represented in films and documentaries.

When the movie was over, Mary nudged Isabelle. Poor old

girl, she'd fallen asleep right before the part where the two
overweight gay men with shaved heads and fuzzy spots on
their shoulders marched down Main Street in some small
town wearing nothing but black leather g-strings and work
boots, waving a rainbow flag every which way while skinny
queens in glittered g-strings bopped and bounced behind
them.

"Come on, Mom," Mary said. "Time for bed now."
Isabelle's head jerked and her eyes opened wide. She sat

up and said, "Did I miss the drag queen that looks like Joan
Collins? The one they call Miss Adventure?"

Mary rolled her eyes. "You fell asleep."
Isabelle made a fist and punched the arm of the chair.

"Darn! That's the part I wanted to see the most. I can't get
over how those boys look so authentic."

"You can watch it again tomorrow," Mary said. "It's late

now." She looked up at the ceiling and shook her head.

Jase stood up and yawned. "I'm exhausted. We're going

up, too."

"I'm not surprised," Mary said. "After the way you were

whacking that kayak this afternoon, I'll bet every muscle in
your body is sore." Then she sent him a knowing glance.

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Luis just smiled and looked down at his shoes, feeling

slightly left out. There was something going on between Jase
and Barry no one wanted to discuss.

Jase smiled and placed his palm on Luis's back. "We'll talk

in the morning. I just want to crash right now."

After they said goodnight, they took Camp out for a quick

walk and then went right up to their room. Jase built a fire in
the walk-in stone fireplace opposite the bed to take the chill
out of the room and Luis climbed into bed and waited for him.
He was naked except for his socks. He just couldn't bring
himself to remove them. Then Jase removed his clothes and
reached for the remote control the close the draperies and
shades. When Jase finally slipped beneath the covers and
sidled up to Luis's back, he kissed Luis on the shoulder and
said goodnight.

The gentle fire gave the room a golden, somber glow. The

warmth from the crackling logs drifted up to the bed and
brushed past Luis's face. He snuggled backwards, reached up
and twisted his fingers through Jase's, and sighed. Whenever
he touched Jase's large, warm hand, he felt a gentle thump in
his stomach and everything that was wrong was suddenly
right again.

Only this time he couldn't help thinking about all the things

he was learning about Jase in Alaska. He felt left out, as if he
didn't have a right to know anything bout Jase's past. He kept
picturing Barry and the dark expression Barry had worn all
through dinner. He remembered the look of devotion and love
in Trey's eyes when he spoke about his past history with Jase.

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So Luis took a quick breath and said, "What's the story

with you and your father?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Jase grumbled.
Luis waited for a moment. "I've told you everything about

me, from my horrible relationship with my parents, to my
past relationship with my first lover. Evidently, there are a
few things you haven't told me yet." And he had told him
everything. There wasn't a thing about Luis that Jase didn't
know.

"It's because it's none of your business," Jase said. He

didn't grumble this time. His voice was clear. But his tone
remained the same: harsh.

Luis opened his eyes wider and thought for a second. He

wasn't trying to provoke Jase. He was only trying to learn
more about him. After all, they were engaged to be married.
Jase was supposed to tell him everything—no secrets. But he
didn't want to press the point so he asked, "What's the deal
with you and this guy Trey?"

"Trey is just an old friend." His tone became glum.
"Were you in love with him?"
Jase groaned and rolled over on his back. "Look, I'm tired.

I just want to sleep. I don't feel like talking about Trey or the
past, and most of all I don't feel like talking about my father.
All you have to worry about is the present. So why don't you
just close your eyes, be a good boy, and go to sleep?"

"I asked you two direct questions I think are important,

and you dismiss me. I'm not a child, Jase." Luis kept his voice
even, but he was clenching his teeth.

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"Then stop acting like a child," Jase said. He rolled over on

his side and faced the fireplace.

When he turned his back to sulk, Luis bolted forward. He

grabbed a pillow, a blanket, and climbed out of bed. It
suddenly occurred to him he was always the one who backed
down and remained quiet.

"Where are you going?"
"I'm sleeping on the floor," Luis said. He'd freeze to death

down there in this humongous igloo, in this place where the
sun didn't go down until nearly midnight. But he didn't care.
If they were going to be married, he wanted to know
everything.

Jase sat up. "This is ridiculous. Come back to bed right

now." He wasn't asking Luis to come back to bed; he was
demanding it.

Luis spread the blankets out on the floor and placed the

pillow at the foot of the bed next to where Camp was curled
up in a ball. "Will you at least tell me what's going on with
your father?"

"I told you it's none of your damn business."
Well, then.
Luis punched the pillow and stretched out on the floor. "I'll

spend the night right here."

Jase punched his pillow and rolled over on his stomach.

"Suit yourself."

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Eleven

Though Luis tossed and turned most of the night, he fell

into a deep sleep sometime between four and five in the
morning. No matter which way he turned he couldn't get
comfortable. The hard floor made his shoulder blades ache;
three blankets couldn't thaw his freezing toes. Even when he
turned on his side and pulled Camp's warm body up next to
his stomach it didn't help. The heat from the fireplace just
rose above his head and passed over him, covering the nice
warm bed where Jase was snoring evenly.

He considered going back to bed after Jase had gone to

sleep. But he was too stubborn. He wanted to prove a point.
Even though Jase was a strong, powerful man, he still had to
respect Luis and treat him like an equal.

In the morning, Luis had planned on waking early, before

Jase rose, and going downstairs for an early morning run.
After that, he'd planned to post something about the trip to
Alaska on Elena's blog. He'd promised Elena and his readers
he'd write a few fast posts about meeting Jase's family and
what life was like in Alaska. But so far he hadn't even had
time to open his laptop and read Elena's blog, let alone write
a blog post.

However, Jase's mother had other plans for them that

morning. Sometime after eight, there was a gentle knock on
the door and Mary said, "Are you guys awake? Breakfast in
bed today. Can I come in?"

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At the sound of her voice, Camp jumped up and yelped.

Then he ran to the door and started wagging his tail. Jase had
mentioned to Luis they never locked the doors in the Nicholas
house. The rule of the house was everyone knocked first
before they entered. Mary didn't like locked bedroom doors,
not since the weekend her depressed cousin from Manitoba
came for a visit. She was going through a bitter divorce at the
time. She locked her bedroom door and refused to come out
until the locksmith came three hours later.

Jase sat up in bed and looked down at Luis on the floor. He

rubbed his eyes and called, "Just one second, Mom. We'll be
ready in a minute." Then he gazed down at Luis and said,
"Get back in bed. I don't want her to see you on the floor."

"I don't think I like your tone," Luis said. He was ordering

him to bed, not asking him.

"Just get the fuck in the bed and we'll talk about it later,"

Jase said.

So Luis reluctantly gathered his covers, picked up the

pillow, and climbed onto the bed without saying a word. Jase
grabbed his arm and yanked him to the middle of the
mattress, where he sank into Jase's warm body. Jase put his
arm around his shoulder and said, "Just smile and pretend
everything is okay. I don't want them to think we were
fighting." Then he pulled the covers up to their waists and
said, "C'mon in, Mom."

As the bedroom door opened, Luis forced a smile. From

the side of his mouth he whispered, "Your mother is okay
seeing us in the same bed this way? She's not going to freak
out or anything?"

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Jase shrugged. In a low voice, he said, "She wouldn't have

knocked on the door if she wasn't. She's proving to us she
accepts us and she's okay with the fact that we're gay and we
sleep together."

Although Luis was still angry with Jase, He didn't have to

force any smiles now. He'd never expected Mary to welcome
him with such open arms, and he'd certainly never guessed
she'd actually come into their bedroom and look at them in
the same bed. Luis knew many young gay couples who went
back home for weekend visits with their families. And even
though the families were polite and tried hard to accept these
gay couples, when it came time for sleeping arrangements
they either pretended the two men didn't sleep together in
the same bed, or they openly suggested the two men sleep in
different beds to avoid any confusion. It even happened with
gay couples who invited family members to their own homes
for the weekend. Very few would admit to their families they
slept together in the same bed. They'd purposely tell their
family members they slept in separate rooms to keep things
from getting too awkward. Evidently, it was perfectly
acceptable to be gay as long as no one mentioned anything
even remotely associated with gay love or, God forbid, sex.
This, of course, included kissing on the lips or anything that
remotely resembled affection.

But Mary trucked into the bedroom, in her crisp white

sweater and pressed slacks, and placed a large breakfast tray
at the foot of the bed. Then she smiled at Jase and Luis and
folded her hands across her stomach. "Ah well, I hope you
both slept well last night."

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Jase smiled and sat up. His right arm was still around

Luis's shoulders and his left arm was on top of the covers.
"Very well," he said. He looked down at Luis. "Did you sleep
well, dear?"

Luis shot him an angry glance, then smiled at Mary and

said, "I've never slept so well in my life." He hoped the bags
beneath his eyes wouldn't give him away.

While Mary reached for the remote control to open the

draperies, Jase's father stepped into the bedroom and stared
at the bed. He rubbed his jaw and took a quick breath. Then
he clenched one fist and put it behind his back so no one
would see it was clenched. "Hope there's room for me in
here." His voice went up; he forced a bigger smile. But it was
obvious seeing his son in bed with a man wasn't easy.

Jase tapped his fingers on Luis's shoulder and said, "We're

just kind of waking up." The sun was strong. He kept
squinting and blinking.

Oddly enough, when Jase's father entered the room, Luis

felt Jase's penis grow into a full erection beneath the covers.
It poked into Luis's thigh and jerked a few times.

Mary set the remote on the end of the bed and crossed to

where Barry was standing. She smiled at him and nodded,
and Barry said, "Your mother had an idea late last night, and
I think it's a good one." He was still smiling, but the words
kept sticking in his mouth.

But he didn't get a chance to finish. Mary lurched forward

and said, "We want you to get married here in Alaska, during
the anniversary/birthday party."

Luis jerked. "Huh?"

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"We want to be there when you get married," Mary said.

"We want you to do it with the support of friends and family,
while you're up here." She was smiling so wide Luis could see
her back teeth. Her arms were moving every which way and
her tone kept rising at the end of every sentence. She
glanced down at Jase and tilted her head. "And this way,
Jase, your grandmother can be a part of it."

Luis smiled and waved his arm. "Ah well, we don't want to

impose on Mom-mom's birthday party, and we don't want to
upstage your anniversary either. We haven't even talked
about setting a definite date. We couldn't do that to you."

While Luis spoke, Jase nodded in agreement. He seemed

distressed, but he still had a full erection.

But Mary was adamant. "We insist."
"But we don't want to ruin Isabelle's birthday," Luis said.

He was smiling and nodding, wishing Jase's erection would go
down. It made him feel creepy with Jase's parents in the
room. He'd always imagined their wedding as a small affair
with a few gay friends at a quiet country inn up in New
England. This, however, was before he learned he was getting
a brand-new family with Jase. For some reason, he hadn't
thought they'd be so welcoming and open.

Then Isabelle strutted into the room in her bright red

sweatsuit. Her brassy blond hair was puffier than usual and
she was wearing long earrings that dangled like tiny crystal
chandeliers. "I've had more birthdays than I care to recall,"
she said. "Please do this. I'd like to see my only grandson's
wedding."

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They all seemed to be ignoring the fact this wasn't just any

old wedding. This was a wedding with two gay men, and it
wasn't even considered legal. So Luis sat up and pointed this
out to them. "I'm not sure. It might be awkward for your
guests...and for you. This isn't exactly a conventional
marriage we're talking about. And if the press found out
about this they might come swooping down on Alaska and
ruin everything. The press has been waiting for Jase to make
some kind of announcement about our relationship for the
past year." Luis didn't want to be rude, but he had to mention
the cold, hard facts.

Barry looked down at his shoes and tightened his lips, as if

he agreed with Luis.

But Mary lifted her chin and said, "I know full well how

people react and talk about this sort of thing. And frankly, I
don't give a damn. Jase is my only son and that's all I care
about. I don't want to miss one of the most important days in
his life. It might not be legal according to the government and
certain closed-minded religious organizations, but it's legal in
the eyes of all that's good and honest, and I want to help you
validate it. The press will never know a thing. We'll keep it all
a secret until we announce it at the party tomorrow."

"And I'm an old woman," Isabelle said. "I might no live

long enough to see my grandson again after this visit." She
sent them a heavy dose of guilt, and at the same time a quiet
reminder Jase didn't come home often enough.

As Jase was about to raise his arm in protest, Luis smiled

at Mary and said, "As long as you are sure it's okay, I think
it's a wonderful idea." She beamed with so much pride, it

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tugged at his heart. He wanted to jump out of bed and hug
her, but he wasn't wearing anything and he didn't want poor
Barry to run out of the room with his hands in the air.

Jase blinked. "You do?"
Luis nodded. "Yes, I do. And I'd like to thank your mother

for suggesting it."

Isabelle lifted her arms and shook her fists. "This is

wonderful. I haven't been this fucking excited since I got
married." Then she leaned forward and whispered. "And I was
already knocked up with him at the time." She cocked her
thumb and pointed it to Barry.

"Mother," Barry said.
Isabelle placed her palm over her lips. "Oops. They don't

like to talk about that."

"And we'll plan it all," Mary said, ignoring her mother-in-

law. "We'll have it in the barn and we'll keep it all a huge
secret until I announce it at the party."

"Who is going to perform the ceremony?" Jase asked,

always the practical one.

"I've already taken care of it," Mary said. "I know this

adorable minister in a very progressive church. He's more
than willing."

Luis smiled. "I've always wanted to get married in a barn."

Actually, he'd pictured a quaint bed-and-breakfast with
antiques and gay-friendly owners. But there was no going
back now. Evidently, they wanted to take complete control
and he wasn't going to stand in their way. And, to be honest,
though he couldn't admit this aloud, for the first time in his
life he felt as if he was part of something important. His own

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family in Tennessee would have chased him off their property
with shotguns and bibles in their hands. Instead of supporting
him and welcoming Jase as his new husband, they would
have condemned him for being gay and predicted his eternal
fate in hell.

"It's meant to be," Isabelle said. She hadn't stopped

smiling since they'd agreed to the wedding. "It means you
and Jase are supposed to be together."

Barry had remained staid through all this. His expression

was blank and he stood behind Mary with his hands in his
pockets. But when Isabelle crossed to the bed to sit down, he
put his arm around his mother and said, "I think we should
leave these two alone now." Then he guided her to the door
and sent her downstairs so she could let Camp and Sweetie-
Pie outside.

Mary stood there, beside the bed, gazing and smiling at

them. She probably wouldn't have left if Barry hadn't come
back into the bedroom to get her. He reached for her arm and
said, "Let's go downstairs now."

"Ah well, yes," Mary said, backing out of the room with

Barry. "I'm just so excited about all this."

When they were gone, Jase sat back and ran his fingers

through his hair. "I can't believe they just did this."

"I can't believe your dick was hard and your family was

standing over us," Luis said.

Jase shrugged. "It's morning. I can't help it."
"It's actually kind of sweet they want to do this," Luis said.
"I feel like I've been blindsided. And I don't get my father.

I know how he feels about us. I know how he feels about me

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being gay. He hasn't accepted us as a couple and I can't
figure out why he's agreeing to this."

"Maybe he has and you don't see it," Luis said. But he was

only being positive, trying to ease Jase's stress. He'd noticed
Barry's peculiar expression, as if he'd been forcing himself to
be nice but his face was ready to explode.

"Oh, I know my father. He's always three steps ahead of

everyone else."

"Well, we were planning to get married anyway," Luis said.

"At least we're making your mother and grandmother happy."

"But I thought you wanted a small wedding, with just a

few friends."

Luis shrugged and climbed out of bed. He poured Jase a

cup of coffee, handed it to him, and said, "It's still going to be
small. And you have to admit it's going to be private because
no one expects us to do this."

"You're okay with this?" Jase asked.
Luis thought for a moment. He looked out the window and

watched a seagull fly over the docks. He'd always believed it
was best to go with his gut instincts. This is what had given
him the courage to leave his first lover and move to New
York. This is what had caused him to forget about his pride
and listen to Jase the day after he'd been arrested on false
charges.

So he lifted his chin and smiled. "I'm okay with it, yes." He

was telling the truth. He still wasn't okay with the way Jase
had treated him the night before, but he didn't want to start
another argument. His friend, Ben, who had been with his
partner, Percy, for many years, once told him he should never

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continue an argument with Jase unless it was absolutely
necessary. And being that most arguments weren't, it's much
better for the relationship to just go back to normal and put
the less important things aside. This, according the Ben, was
not denial. It was the secret to keeping a relationship strong
enough to last a lifetime.

Jase sat back and sipped his coffee. "Then I guess we're

getting married right here in Alaska, in front of a bunch of
people I either don't know, don't remember, or haven't seen
in more years than I can remember."

"We're not doing it for people," Luis said. "We're doing it

for your mother and your grandmother." He didn't mention
Barry, because he still wasn't sure Barry was thrilled about
them being together.

"I guess you're right," Jase said. "Where are you going

now?"

Luis had poured himself a half cup of coffee and downed it

fast. He was on his way to the bathroom. "I'm going out for
run. Then I'm going to call the general store in town to see if
my new phone came in, then check my laptop. I have to write
a fast blog post and I haven't even looked at my e-mail since
we left New York. I'm sure it's full." Since he'd been blogging,
he'd learned to check his e-mail constantly to keep it from
becoming overwhelming. On a daily basis, he often received
at least two hundred messages from readers, fans of the
blog, and his modeling fans. And there was always a kind
note or comment from Elena. If there was one person in the
entire world he wished he could invite to his wedding, it was

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her. But this, he knew, was impossible. This was such short
notice he couldn't even invite Ben and Percy.

As he entered the bathroom, Jase sat up and asked, "Are

we okay now?"

Luis knew he was talking about their argument the night

before. "Yes," he said. "We're okay."

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Twelve

He had to borrow one of Jase's old sweatsuits for his run

because he'd only brought shorts and T-shirts. He'd imagined
it would be cooler in Alaska, but he hadn't expected it to be in
the low fifties. Though he preferred to run in cold weather
and it was never a problem in the winter back in New York,
he'd always been prepared for things like this ahead of time.

As he jogged down a long narrow path from the back of

the house that led into the woods, it occurred to him he
hadn't been prepared for anything about Alaska or Jase's
family, especially when it came to all their hidden feelings and
the things they didn't speak about aloud. Sometimes it felt as
if he was watching a pressure cooker and the lid was ready to
blow. There were other times when they seemed too open
and too accepting to be believable. He figured he'd adjust in
time. He hadn't been around a family situation in years, and
even then his own family had been so dysfunctional it was far
from the norm.

Halfway into his run, he tripped over a large rock and went

tumbling down a steep ravine. He went with the fall, allowing
his body to bend and move freely, knowing if he stiffened he
could break a bone. When he landed at the bottom of the
ravine and sat up, he realized he'd lost his way. A state park
bordered the Nicholas property. He knew he was in the park,
but didn't know how to get back to the house.

He stood and brushed off his sweatpants. He stretched his

arms and legs to be sure nothing was broken. His ankle was a

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little sore, but he knew it was nothing serious. Then he put
his hands on his hips and looked back and forth to see if he
could find a path that led somewhere. But all he saw were
huge tree trunks and thick sections of brush. To his left, a
twig cracked and he jumped. When a small animal ran
between two trees, Luis backed into a large tree trunk and bit
his bottom lip. This was serious. He was lost in the woods
somewhere in Alaska, surrounded by wild animals and
unfamiliar terrain, and without a phone. When he looked up
to see if he could backtrack, he realized the wall of brush and
thick tree roots he'd tumbled down was much to steep to
climb.

Then he heard a groan: deep and throaty, with a

frightening wheeze. It came from beyond a thick wall of brush
about ten feet in front of him. A second later, he heard a
series of grunts and growls. He backed into the tree trunk and
closed his eyes. He clenched his fists and prepared to be
attacked by a polar bear or some other wild Alaskan animal
that could pass for Bigfoot. He heard two more growls
followed by a peculiar whistle.

His eyes opened wide. Bears and other animals didn't

whistle. So he took slow steps forward, spread a few wild
berry bushes apart, and poked his head through the brush.
That's when he saw the woman politician/author who had
been a guest at the party the day they'd arrived in Alaska.
She was sitting cross-legged in front of a small fire with a set
of moose antlers on her head. Her eyes were closed and her
hands were folded as if she was praying. But when Luis took a
step forward to get a better look at what she was doing—this

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was too good to miss—his foot became tangled in a vine and
he fell face forward through the flimsy bushes.

The woman opened her eyes and smiled.
Luis lifted his head and nodded. "I was just going for a

run. Sorry to interrupt you." What else could he say? He
figured this might be something private she didn't want
anyone to know about. After all, how many prominent
women, not to mention bestselling authors, went around with
set of moose antlers on their heads in the middle of the
woods?

The woman stood and said, "Come here and join me. I was

just giving thanks." She slapped her thigh and smiled.

"Ah well, I have to get back now. Jase will be looking for

me." He didn't want to get to know her. She was the
penultimate conservative. From everything he'd heard about
her, she was against same-sex marriage and equal rights for
gays. Besides, he was embarrassed. He was so out of touch
with politics, not to mention frustrated and disinterested, he
didn't even remember her name.

"Don't be silly," she said. "Get on over here and help me

give thanks to the universe." She spoke with the same subtle
accent Jase's parents had. Though Jase had lost most of his
accent, there were times when Luis picked up hints of it.
Accents could be tricky this way. Luis even had a tendency to
revert back to his Tennessee accent when he was excited
about something.

Luis didn't want to be rude, so he walked toward her and

smiled. "I really should be getting back. I don't want them to

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think I got lost." He was lost but he didn't want to admit this
to her.

She must have noticed the confusion in his eyes. "I come

down here, to this same spot, every once in a while to give
thanks. Stop looking at me as if I've lost my mind. It's
perfectly harmless and I'm perfectly sane." Then she smiled
and said, "I've got a lot of shit in my life right now."

Luis smiled. He wasn't so sure about her sanity, but he

understood the part about having a lot of shit in her life. His
highly vocal political friends back in New York thought she
was a loon. Some even thought she was the anti-Christ. And
they'd never even seen her with moose antlers on her head,
grunting and groaning up at the sky.

"I promise," she said, "I'm not as bad as they say I am. I

don't judge people as individuals. And I'm no saint myself."

Luis shrugged his shoulders and took a few more steps

forward. There was a small fire burning—just dried leaves,
small twigs, and a few pine cones that made crackling
sounds. "It seems I took a wrong step and fell down the
ravine back there."

"Are you okay, honey?" she asked, looking him up and

down with furrowed eyebrows.

"Oh, I'm fine," he said. "I just have to start getting back

now so they won't worry. I'll let you get back to whatever it
was you were doing here."

But as he turned to leave she handed him a long stick with

feathers fastened to the end. She told him it was good luck to
dance around the fire and wave the stick, offering thanks to
the universe. She said it was cleansing and it rejuvenated the

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spirit. Before he even knew what was happening, they were
both dancing around the fire, waving their sticks, grunting
and howling up at the sky.

Luis had always been the type who didn't go looking for

unusual situations, but they always seemed to find him
anyway. If there were fifty normal people sitting in a doctor's
waiting room and one peculiar person, the normal people
would ignore Luis and the peculiar person would sit next to
him and start talking. He tended to be a magnet for people
with problems and unusual circumstances. They flocked to his
side and told him their life stories. Once, in a dentist's office,
a good-looking young guy wearing two diamond studs spent
two hours telling Luis about his addiction to sex while Luis
just sat there smiling and nodding.

Although Luis knew this woman was politically

conservative and against legalized same-sex marriage, she
treated him as if he was her new best friend. Halfway through
their dance around the fire, she even tapped his back and
said, "I had a feeling I was going to like you when I saw you
at the party. You're okay in my book, fella."

Luis just smiled and thanked her, then lifted his stick and

waved it in circles. At least she didn't call him boy. If Ben and
Percy saw him right now, they'd never speak to him again. In
the past few years, Luis had witnessed lifelong friends stop
talking to each other over politics, which always left him
shrugging his shoulders in disbelief.

They were standing in front of the fire, laughing and rolling

their hips in circles, when Jase tapped him on the shoulder
and said, "There you are. I've been looking all over for you."

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Luis was really into the dance by then. He'd left his

inhibitions behind and he'd lost track of time. But he stopped
and looked over his shoulder. He felt his face flush and he
forced a smile. "I was just on my way back," he said. "I sort
of lost track of time."

Jase nodded and smiled at the woman. He referred to her

by a nickname Luis had never heard mentioned before in
public, and then he smiled at Luis and said, "We have to go
into town. Your phone is in and I want to pick up a few
things."

Luis turned to the woman and said, "Thanks, sweetie, I

had fun. I hope it works, too." He was talking about the dance
he'd just done to give thanks. It was supposed to bring good
luck.

"Thank you so much," she said, "for not getting all political

on me. I was worried there for a moment. Believe it or not, I
like to take a break from politics and just be normal,
whatever that is."

Jase laughed. "Don't worry about Luis being too political.

He thinks the next Democratic Convention should be held in
Paris."

Though Luis still didn't get why they thought this was so

funny, Jase and the woman laughed so hard she doubled over
and slapped her knees. And on the way back to the house,
Jase couldn't stop laughing about finding Luis in the woods,
with the most conservative female politician on the planet,
dancing around in circles and waving. "You certainly do wind
up in the most unusual predicaments, don't you? If any one

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of our friends in New York saw you even speaking with her,
they'd stone you in Washington Square."

Luis smiled and shrugged his shoulders. "She seems nice

enough. So we don't agree on politics. Big deal. People are
still people and politics isn't everything, you know. Besides, I
had fun. How often does a person get a chance to go to
Alaska and do a spiritual dance of thanks that is supposed to
bring good luck?" Luis didn't mention this aloud, but he
thought some of these overly political, ranting types were
slightly unstable. Oddly enough, most of them never actually
became involved in anything productive. They didn't donate
their time, their money, or their talents to actually help the
causes that seemed to fire them up. All they did was open
their big mouths and shout about how everything was so
wrong.

Jase put his arm around his shoulders and hugged him.

"You don't even know her name, do you?"

Luis grinned. "Not freaking a clue."
After Luis took a fast shower and changed his clothes, they

went down to the docks and climbed into a smaller boat. This
one was more like those pointy-nosed speed boats that
competed in races he'd seen in TV.

"Why aren't we taking the bigger boat?" Luis asked. He'd

just gotten used to riding in the bigger boat. He wasn't sure
about this one. Though it had a flashy appeal, there was
something rinky-dink and lacking about it.

"My mother and grandmother need it to go into town,"

Jase said. "I didn't want to go with them because I thought it
would be easier."

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"Is this thing safe?" It wasn't much larger than their

sunken tub in Trump Tower.

Jase tossed him a life jacket and said, "Just get in. You'll

be fine."

At first, as they pulled away from the docks, Luis felt a tug

in his stomach. He was sitting beside Jase in the passenger
seat. He gripped the bottom of his seat and squeezed the
cushion. He wondered why there weren't any seat belts in
boats but he didn't want to distract Jase by asking. The
smaller boat seemed to rock and sway more than the larger
boat. And the front tip (he knew there were nautical terms for
these things, but wasn't sure what they were and he didn't
care about details that didn't affect him personally) tended to
rise while the back end went down into the water. When they
were far enough away from the docks and in much deeper
water, Jase pulled the throttle and the front end went up even
higher. Luis took a quick look back to see if his stomach had
landed on the backseat.

As Jase picked up speed, Luis closed his eyes and

pretended he was back in New York walking in Riverside Park.
Camp was by his side and Ben and Percy were up ahead
walking their dog. It was a bright, warm New York afternoon
without a cloud in the sky. He even pictured himself stopping
to buy a pretzel from a vendor and giving a small piece to
Camp. And by the time they reached the boat docks in town,
his stomach was calm and his heart wasn't racing anymore.
He opened his eyes, sat back in his seat and said, "I actually
enjoyed that ride. I wasn't scared at all."

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"You're getting used to it," Jase said, as he maneuvered

the boat into a small dock space between two larger boats.
"Maybe next time you'll get naked and we can drop anchor."

Luis ignored that comment. "Where are the brakes?" he

asked. He was curious. He knew the throttle was what made
the boat go forward, neutral, or reverse. But he couldn't seem
to locate the brakes.

"There are no brakes," Jase said.
"No brakes?"
Jase laughed. "I'll show you later. It's all about

maneuvering and learning how to go between forward,
neutral, and reverse. Lean over now and grab that rope and
tie it to the dock."

When the boat was secure, they walked into town and

crossed Main Street. There was no hand holding this time, not
the way they held hands when they were in New York. They
headed a few bocks north and stopped when they reached a
general store with the Nicholas name over the door. Jase
went inside first and Luis followed, which wouldn't have
happened in New York. Jase would have opened the door and
waited for Luis to enter first.

Jase waved at someone behind the counter and said, "Hey,

buddy."

A guy stepped from behind the counter and said, "Hey,

Jase." Luis remembered his face. He was the little guy who
had done the striptease act at the bar the other day. He was
fully dressed now, with a white polo shirt and a pair of jeans.
His black leather boots seemed to make him an inch or two
taller.

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When the stripper recognized Luis from the bar, he crossed

to where he was standing and said, "Hey, cutie. There you
are again."

Jase had walked away by then. He'd gone to the back of

the store to get a few things he needed and he'd left Luis
alone to wait for him. So Luis just smiled and said, "Ah well,
here I am. Nice to see you." He wished he could be as casual
and easy as Jase. He wished he could call other guys buddy
and pal and man and make it sound realistic. But when he
spoke that way it didn't sound casual, but forced and out of
context.

Jase yelled from the back of the store. "Is the phone I

ordered ready, buddy?"

The stripper smiled at Luis and said, "I'll get it, boss."
Luis shoved his hands into his pockets and looked up at

the ceiling. He felt as if the stripper was undressing him with
his eyes. Tis guy wasn't shy about it either. Evidently, there
were plenty of gay men in Alaska, too, and they were just as
aggressive as the gay men in New York.

When Jase returned, he was carrying a plastic bag filled

with junk food. Luis gave him a look and said, "This is what
you needed in town?" He pulled out a bag of processed chips.
"This is just wrong."

Jase smiled and shoved the chips back into his bag. "We

had to get the phone, too." Then he walked toward the exit
and left Luis there waiting for the phone. He didn't offer to
pay, and the other clerk, a thin young woman behind the
other counter, didn't ask for any money.

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When the stripper returned, he handed Luis the phone and

squeezed Luis's hand. "It's all set and ready to go, cutie."
Then he gave Luis a bag with the accessories and tried to
caress the top of Luis's head.

But Luis pulled back just in time. He ducked and the

stripper's hand landed on a magazine display instead.
"Thanks," Luis said, then turned and left so he could catch up
with Jase.

When he was outside, he jogged up to Jase's side. He was

walking north, staring into the window of a bookstore. "The
guy who works in the general store isn't shy."

Jase laughed. "He thinks you're cute. It's a compliment."
He was always so casual about this sort of thing. If a guy

had flirted with Jase this way, Luis wouldn't have been so
complacent. He would have stepped in and made it a point to
show he was with Jase. He would have made a few snarky
comments and put the other guy in his place. But not Jase;
he'd just smiled and called him buddy.

As they continued down the street, Luis opened his new

phone and checked his messages. There were ten: the first
message was from his agent letting him know he still hadn't
heard anything about the modeling job, and the second one
was from Elena in France. Though they'd been communicating
through e-mail and blogging for a long time, and they'd never
actually spoken to each other. This was the first time he'd
heard her actual voice. It was deeper than he'd expected it to
be and her message sounded urgent. She told him the blog
was filled with comments about his last post and readers were

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filling her inbox with questions about what was happening
with Luis and Jase in Alaska.

"I have to get to a computer," Luis said. "Is there a cafe or

something with Internet access?" He wasn't using his iphone
in Alaska; he'd left it in New York because he didn't think he'd
need it. This was just a regular cell phone, which he preferred
when it came to making calls. And he was too excited to wait
until he went back to the house to check his laptop.

But Jase laughed. "There's no Internet cafe like New York,

sorry. But I think the library has a few computers. It's not
far."

On the way to the library, Jase smiled and said hello to

everyone he passed. The people nodded at Luis with polite
smiles, but they all gave him the same cautious glance, as if
he'd just arrived from another planet. When they entered the
library a middle-aged woman told Jase he was looking good
since she'd seen him last. Jase told her Luis wanted to use a
computer. She frowned at Luis, scrunched her lips, and
pointed to three ancient computers along the far right wall.

They crossed to the computers and Luis looked down at

them with his palm on his chest. "I've never seen anything
like this." They were huge, with massive screens and cracked
plastic cases. The sides were smudged with ink stains and the
screens were dotted with fingerprints. "I should have brought
a bottle of window cleaner with me."

But Jase didn't reply. His head was turned and he was

staring at the back of the library. There was some sort of
children's event going on. There were three rows of pre-
school children sitting in tiny chairs lined side by side in a half

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circle. Trey was sitting in the middle of the half circle talking
to the children. Trey's face lifted with animation, and his eyes
bulged. He was using exaggerated movements with his arms
and his hands. Luis couldn't hear what Trey was saying, but
he heard the children laughing and giggling at his remarks.

"You'll be okay here for a minute," Jase said. He was

staring at Trey. There wasn't a question mark at the end of
the sentence.

"I'm fine," Luis said.
"I'll be right back."
Luis sat down in front of the computer screen and dropped

a few coins into a slot to boot it up. But as the screen
appeared, Luis followed Jase instead of the computer. By the
time Jase went to the back of the room, the children started
applauding and Trey stood up from his chair. When Trey saw
Jase coming toward him, Trey tilted his head and smiled so
wide something in Luis's stomach thumped. Then his heart
started to race. Though he couldn't hear what they were
saying, he could see their expressions and the deep, intense
way they were gazing at each other. One of the children
started tugging at Trey's jacket and Trey didn't even realize
the kid was doing it. Trey was too busy staring into Jase's
eyes and concentrating on everything Jase was saying to him
as if it meant life or death.

Luis sat back and sighed. He didn't even open Elena's web

page to see all the comment his readers had left. All of a
sudden, a dark, disconnected feeling came over him and he
couldn't concentrate on anything but Jase and Trey standing
in the back of the room, laughing and joking with each other.

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In all the time Luis had known Jase, he'd never seen him look
at another man this way.

For the next ten minutes, he pretended to concentrate on

the computer. When he saw Jase turn and start walking back
to where he was sitting, he clicked it off and stood up. He
didn't want Jase to know there was anything wrong.

"Did you get what you need?" Jase asked. He was smiling,

but his voice wasn't animated anymore. Though he was
talking to Luis, he seemed to be preoccupied with something
else.

"I read a few things," Luis said. "I can post something later

with my laptop at the house. It's the Internet. It can wait."

They left the library in silence and started walking back

toward the middle of town. But when they reached Bishop
Street, they ran into Isabelle and Mary. The two women were
coming out of a florist shop, murmuring to each other.

Isabelle looked up first. "There you are," she said. "We've

been looking all over for you guys." She was wearing her lime
green sweatsuit with matching running shoes.

"Where were you?" Mary asked.
"The library," said Jase. He was smiling, but there was

something different about the way he was acting. He was
rocking on his feet and fidgeting with the boat keys.

Mary stepped forward and grabbed Luis by the hand. She

pulled him next to her and said, "We need to borrow Luis for
a little while."

"Borrow him?" Jase asked.
Luis looked up, then down. He couldn't begin to guess

what they were talking about.

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"We need to pick up a few things for the wedding, and Luis

has to be with us," Isabelle said. She grabbed Luis's other
hand and said, "It's girly stuff that would only bore you to
death. You go into town and hang out somewhere. Luis will
meet you back at the boat in an hour."

Ah well, Luis thought. Here they go again. They were

treating him like the woman in the relationship. He glared at
Jase, pleading with his eyes for help. But Jase still seemed
preoccupied with the conversation he'd had with Trey in the
library. The next thing Luis knew, Mary and Isabelle were
dragging him down Bishop Street to a little boutique on the
corner. Jase remained in the middle of the street with his
hands in his pockets, gazing down at the pavement as if he'd
just lost his most valuable possession in the world and knew
he'd never get it back.

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Chapter Thirteen

When they entered the boutique, Luis looked around and

sighed. It was one of those combination clothing shops,
jewelry stores, and candy counters. The sign outside read
"Nicholas Fashions, Notions, and Sweets." Mary told him it
was actually her shop but she only worked there once in a
while when the manager needed extra help. She smiled and
said she'd always wanted to own a store where women could
go to find pretty, delicate things you couldn't find anywhere
else. Good chocolate had to be treated with the highest
regards. So far, this shop had been a huge hit both for the
women in town and for the many women in surrounding
towns. Mary said they came from as far as Anchorage to
check out her merchandise and eat the chocolate.

Luis just smiled and nodded. He grabbed a few dark

chocolate truffles and sat in an overstuffed pink velvet slipper
chair near the dressing room. He pretended to enjoy himself
while Mary tried on a few dresses for the party. She told Luis
she had already purchased something new, but that was
when she'd thought it was going to be just an
anniversary/birthday party. Now that it was going to be a
wedding reception, too, she had to get something extra
special.

The first dress was a beige leopard chiffon affair, with that

dramatic bare shoulder look that had been popular for three
days back in the nineties during the Clinton administration.
Luis had planned to sit there and keep his mouth shut. He

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didn't want to offer any advice. He didn't want to be their
girlfriend. But he couldn't let Mary wear a hideous dress like
this to the party. It looked like something Wilma Flintstone
would have worn to Pebbles and Bam Bam's wedding.

So he smiled and said, "It's not you, seriously."
Then she tried on a black taffeta, and he said, "Too glum."
After that, it was some kind of blousy peach tunic with

shimmering gold slacks. When Luis frowned and said, "Looks
like Martha Stewart dropping acid," poor Isabelle clutched her
sweatshirt and nearly fell off her chair laughing.

The off-white tent dress wasn't bad, but it had this mock

empire waist thing going on Luis always thought looked better
on full-figured women. Mary was thin and petite; she could
get away with anything. It was a waste to hide such a great
body beneath a tent dress, even if it was a nice dress. He
smiled and nodded, then shook his head and said, "Looks like
something Oprah would have worn to the Emmy Awards in
l988." He pointed to the dressing room and said, "Next."

When she came out of the dressing room wearing the red

dress with the heart-shaped bodice defined with black
embroidery, he shrugged and said, "Why don't I just look
through the racks and see what's there? Save you the time."
It was getting late. He didn't want Jase waiting for him.

Though it wasn't easy, Luis finally found a pale blue Chanel

suit with a tailored jacket and a short, snug skirt. The lines
were classic, the design simple. The price tag read fifteen
hundred dollars, but she owned the store so it didn't matter
what it cost. There was a four-inch slit in the back of the skirt
and the jacket fit so well it didn't even need alterations. In

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fact, when Mary came waltzing out of the dressing room in
this suit everyone turned to stare at her. Isabelle's jaw
dropped and the manager's eyes bulged.

She sent Luis a stare and shrugged.
Luis said, "That's the one. You look spectacular."
"Are you sure it's not too young for me?" She turned

sideways and tried to see the back. "It's awfully short. And so
expensive. I've never worn a dress that cost this much."

"You look like Princess Diana in that suit," Luis said. "It's

not too short, and it's not too young. You have a figure and
legs most younger women would kill for. You should show
them off. And this is your fortieth wedding anniversary,
Isabelle's ninetieth birthday, and our wedding. I'll buy it for
you if I have to." The dress was so perfect he would have,
too.

Mary glanced at Isabelle. "What do you think, Mom?"
"I think it's hot, baby," Isabelle said. "Barry's gonna chase

you around the house when he sees it and lift up your skirt."
Then she poked Luis in the ribs and patted her front pocket.
"If she won't spring for it, I'll split the cost with you. I brought
cash."

Poor Mary; she blushed and covered her face with her

palms. "What kind of shoes will I wear?" She was in her bare
feet.

But Luis had already thought about this while she'd been

changing. He'd looked at the size inside her boots and he'd
gone to the shoe section. Though there hadn't been much of
a selection—no Blahniks!—he'd found something that worked
well. He held up a pair of light fawn-colored pumps with four-

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inch heels and waved them back and forth. "Put these on. You
can't go wrong with fawn-colored pumps. Black always gives
that amateur cloven hoof look, and brown would be too
casual. But light fawn is classic. And I always think it's better
to play it safe than be sorry." Oh, how Luis hated those loud,
pushy fashion types who were always hawking bright colors
and flashy, garish patterns. They were forever telling women
they needed clothes that would "pop" when what they really
needed was something more subdued and tasteful, with just
the right amount of color.

When she tried on the shoes and looked into the three-way

mirror, she smiled for the first time since she'd been trying on
outfits. "I love it. I really do. And I deserve to buy something
extravagant for a change. Besides, I get it at cost anyway."
Then she bent down and hugged Luis. "Thank you so much
for helping. I would have wound up with something I didn't
love if you hadn't been here."

There was an awkward pause. He felt a little guilty

because he didn't really want to be there. But when he saw
the way her face was gleaming with pride, and realized he
was actually enjoying himself, it stabbed at his heart in a way
he hadn't expected. "You're a great-looking woman. I didn't
do anything special, Mrs. Nicholas." He hadn't referred to her
by name yet. Calling her Mrs. Nicholas sounded so formal and
tight.

She smiled. "If you'd like, you can either call me Mary, or

even Mom."

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He felt a sting in his eye. She was just saying Mary to be

polite. She really wanted him to call her mom. He cleared his
throat and said, "I'd like that a lot, Mom."

But this warm, tender moment disappeared a few minutes

later when Isabelle came trucking out of the dressing room in
her outfit for the party. Instead of wearing a dress or a suit,
Isabelle had ordered a special sweatsuit designed specifically
for her own personal taste. It was jet black, with a slightly
shinier material than a normal sweatsuit. The crew neck top
was trimmed with white fake fur, and the front of the shirt
was studded with large rhinestones spelling out the number
ninety.

Isabelle strutted with her hands on her hips, turning in half

circles to show the outfit off. When she stopped and her
sneaker squeaked against the tile floor, she turned and
asked, "How do I look? I have black leather boots to match at
home."

Mary ran over and hugged her. "You look wonderful, Mom.

You're going to be the best-dressed lady there."

Then Luis went over and gave her a hug. "I love it. In New

York, you'd be huge in this outfit, Mom-mom."

When he called her Mom-mom, Mary and Isabelle stopped

and looked at him. He hadn't thought about it, the words just
came sailing out of his mouth. But maybe he'd been too
familiar this time. He'd heard Jase call her Mom-mom and he
figured it was okay. But when he looked back at their stunned
expressions, he felt a lump in the back of his throat.

"I hope it's okay I called you Mom-mom," he said. He

figured he'd better explain. "If it's not I won't do it anymore."

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Isabelle lurched forward and hugged him. She patted his

back and said, "I wouldn't want you to call me anything else.
I'm honored."

Then Mary smiled and said, "I'd love it if we could all come

to New York for the holidays this year. I haven't spent a
holiday with Jase in such a long time." She said this with
quiet reservation, as if she were testing Luis's reaction, but
Luis had a feeling she'd been planning to say it all afternoon.

Isabelle squared her shoulders. "I can wear this outfit,

too."

Luis shrugged. "That would be wonderful. Or maybe we

could just come up here to Alaska for the holidays." Why
should they all traipse off to New York when it was much
easier for Jase and Luis to come to Alaska?

Mary gasped and covered her mouth with her palms. Then

she started to cry. "I'd like that very much."

Isabelle smiled and patted Mary's back. "Buck up, sister.

We have a few more things to do before Luis has to get back
to Jase. You know how Jase hates to be kept waiting."

"I know, I know," Mary said. Then she went into the

dressing room to find a tissue.

Luis watched both women, with his hand pressed to his

stomach. He didn't think he'd done anything special. But from
the way Mary reacted to them coming to Alaska for the
holidays, anyone else would have thought he'd given her a
bag of gold.

While Mary was inside, Luis smiled at Isabelle and said,

"You guys know I'm not the woman in the relationship." He
wanted this to come out right and Isabelle, though ninety,

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seemed more sophisticated than Mary when it came to these
things. "Jase and I are both guys. In our relationship it isn't
like one is the man or one is the woman."

Isabelle laughed and waved her arm. "I have to admit that

we were curious about that in the beginning. Jase has always
been so macho and strong-willed. But now that we've met
you, we know it was silly to think that way. You're just as
much of a man as Jase or anyone else. We only snagged you
this afternoon to spend time with you so we could get to
know you, not because we think of you as the woman. We
never really got to know Jase's ex-wife." She leaned forward
and whispered. "She was a real living bitch if there ever was
one. You couldn't get close to that fucking dragon if you
tried."

Luis exhaled. "Well, that's a shame, because she missed

out on getting to know some really good people."

When it was time for Luis to go back to the docks to meet

up with Jase, they hugged him again and thanked him for
helping Mary find the perfect dress. And though he should
have been elated, his stomach twisted and a lump formed in
his throat. Iit wasn't because they thought of him as the
woman in the relationship anymore. He'd cleared this up with
Isabelle. It was because they were so excited about the
wedding, Jase being home, and having the feeling of a real
family around they couldn't stop praising him. But Luis
frowned when he thought about what Jase was feeling. He'd
seen the way Jase and Trey looked at each other. He'd seen
them exchange glances when they thought no one was
looking at them.

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And there was also Jase's father. That stubborn man would

never accept him no matter how hard he tried.

So he walked back to the docks and found Jase leaning

against the side of the boat. When Jase saw him coming, he
switched the engine on and made a move to untie the front of
the boat from the dock. He worked fast with his hands. His
pinched lips revealed his pensive mood.

Luis untied the rear and jumped into the boat. Before Jase

had a chance to stop him, he sat behind the steering wheel,
pushed the throttle forward, and sped away from the docks,
leaving a tall spray of water behind them.

"What are you doing?" Jase shouted. He grabbed the back

of the passenger seat and pulled his way forward.

"I need to get out of here," Luis said. "And fast." They

were going so fast that when Luis turned the steering wheel
to the left to avoid two oncoming boats, the entire boat tilted
to the side.

"Have you lost your mind?" Jase said. "Are you still upset

about them treating you as if you're the woman in our
relationship? It's not big thing. I'll talk to them."

"It's not that," Luis said. "We cleared all that up this

afternoon. We had a great time together." He had to shout
above the sound of the engine and the splashing water.

"Then what the fuck is wrong with you?"
"It's your mother and grandmother, and how wonderful

they are. I really do love them. It's about us coming up here
and spending the holidays with your family and your mother
crying about it. I haven't had a family for so long I'd forgotten
how it can be. It's about how much your father hates me.

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Most of all, it's about the way you and Trey look at each
other, as if you're both love-starved teenagers. I can't
compete with him. I'm not a doctor and I don't read stories to
little kids in the town library. I'm just an ex-male escort
trying to make a living now as a model for discount
department stores. There's nothing heroic about me. When I
first got here I thought I was better than everyone because
I'm from New York. Now I think everyone here is better than
me."

"That's just ridiculous," Jase shouted, and stood. "You're

just as good as everyone else."

Luis released the steering wheel and put his hands on his

hips. "What about Trey? He's better than me. And he's still in
love with you. He's a doctor. He's known your family all his
life. He fits in and I don't. I'm sure your father wouldn't mind
you marrying him."

The boat swerved. Jase lunged for the steering wheel. "Get

down," he shouted. Then he pushed Luis to the back of the
boat and tried to avoid hitting a large rock by turning the
wheel all the way to the left.

The boat veered left. Jase avoided the large rock and what

could have been a devastating situation. But Luis flipped
backwards and landed in the water. He wasn't wearing a life
jacket this time. Though he didn't know how to swim, he
somehow managed to wave his arms and kick his legs so he'd
rise to the surface. When he did reach the surface and he
watched the boat speeding off in the distance, his heart
started so race to fast he thought he was having a heart
attack.

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By the time Jase turned around and saw Luis had fallen off

the boat, Luis was trying as hard as he could to keep his head
above the surface. He'd never kicked his legs or moved his
arms so hard and so fast in his life. When he finally found his
voice, he screamed Jase's name over and over, pleading for
him to return.

Jase turned the boat around and sped toward him. "Swim

to the rock," he shouted, pushing the throttle forward all the
way.

Luis kicked hard and managed to grab hold of a pointed

edge on the rock. He squeezed the edge with both hands and
pulled his body up to safety. His heart pounded in his ears.
The only thoughts passing through his consciousness were to
hold on for a long and as hard as he could. He wasn't even
aware the water was freezing and his body was trembling. All
he cared about was clinging to the rock and taking long, deep
breaths.

When Jase finally pulled up to the rock, he stopped the

boat and reached out with both hands. "Take my hand," he
said. "I'll pull you up. You're going to be okay."

But Luis refused to budge. His entire body was frozen with

panic and he feared if he let go of the rock for even one
second he'd sink to the bottom of the water and drown.

"Take my hand," Jase said. "You'll be fine. I promise. Don't

be afraid."

Luis stared straight ahead. He heard him but couldn't

move his arms. Here he was, a homosexual boy born and
raised in Tennessee who had somehow managed to move to
New York with no money or friends and he'd survived it all.

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And now he was about to die in some frigid body of water in
Alaska he couldn't even name, surrounded by strangers. He
didn't even know the name of the town, or the exact location
on the map.

Jase yelled, "I said take my hand, damn it. I can't help you

if you don't reach out to me."

Luis snapped out of his daze. He reached out once, then

pulled his hand back fast. When Jase shouted at him again,
he extended his arm and placed his palm in Jase's hand.

In a split second, Jase squeezed his hand as hard as he

could and pulled him off the rock, out of the water, and back
into the boat with one swift move. He lifted Luis over the side
and carried him to the back seat. "You're okay," Jase said.
"It's going to be fine." Then he hugged him and said, "I love
you so much. I've never been so scared in my life."

Luis's entire body trembled from both cold and fear. His

quivering lips were purple and his shaking hands were
shriveled. While Jase covered his body with a blanket he'd
pulled out of the storage compartment, Luis stared straight
ahead and said, "You knocked me right off the boat. I could
have drowned."

"I didn't want to hit the rock," Jase said with a defensive

tone. He wrapped his arms around Luis and held him close to
his body. "But you're going to be okay. I promise. I wouldn't
let anything happen to you."

Luis leaned into his strong chest and closed his eyes. He

knew Jase hadn't knocked him off on purpose. But even
though he'd just survived one of the worst things he'd ever
experienced in his life, he wasn't so sure he was going to be

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okay. He had this sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach
Jase wanted to be with Trey more than he wanted to be with
him. He had a stronger feeling he just wasn't good enough for
Jase or Jase's family, especially Barry.

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Chapter Fourteen

"I'll help you out," Jase said. They'd just arrived at the

house and Jase wanted to make sure Luis hadn't hurt himself
when he'd fallen off the boat. Jase still had trouble speaking;
his voice remained low and even. When he'd looked back and
he'd seen Luis struggling to survive in the water, it felt as
though his heart had been ripped from his chest. The images
of losing Luis forever, passing through his mind in quick
flashes, were worse than any nightmares he'd ever dreamed.
Now that Luis was safe, he didn't want to let him out of his
sight. "I'll carry you back to the house."

"I'm good," Luis said. "I can walk." He struggled out of the

boat with his body still wrapped in the blanket. Thanks to the
fact that the weather had warmed up to the almost sixty
degrees, the sun had almost completely dried his hair.
Though his clothes were still damp, and his face was pale and
sunken, at least he wasn't shivering anymore.

Jase tied up the boat and followed him to the house. The

dogs were barking in the distance, but there was a startling
silence between them. Jase was planning to draw a hot bath
so Luis could soak and relax. After the bath, they'd take a
long nap together. Luis hadn't spoken much since they'd
arrived and he wanted to do something nice for him.

But Barry stomped out the back door and met them at the

steps. He frowned and rubbed his jaw. He lifted his chin and
said, "I have to speak with you both. Please follow me."

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Luis and Jase exchanged glances, then followed him to a

small shed at the far end of the property where they kept all
the mowers, gardening tools, and snow plows. Jase had no
idea why his father was bringing them down there, but he
had feeling it was going to be interesting. In Barry's own
small world, he was used to getting exactly what he wanted
and no one ever dared to get in his way. The only people who
had ever stood up to him were Jase, Isabelle, and Mary. And
not often.

When they went inside the building, Jase noticed the way

Luis was looking around. He seemed to be studying Jase's
father as if he didn't trust him either. So Jase sent him a
reassuring glance and smiled.

"Your mother is never to know about any of this," Barry

said. "I don't want to upset her."

Jase blinked. This was even too dramatic for his father.

"What on earth are you talking about?"

Before Barry could reply, a small man wearing a light tan

safari suit stepped out from behind a wall. He had bright red
hair and freckles on his face. He was carrying a briefcase and
wearing eyeglasses with large black frames.

"This is a private detective from New York I hired to check

Luis out," Barry said. "He's managed to come up with a few
interesting pieces of information about Luis's past."

"How dare you?" Jase said. He clenched his fists and bit his

bottom lip. "Jase," Luis said. "It's okay." He glared at Barry
and raised one eyebrow. "I'm not ashamed of anything in my
past. Jase knows everything about me."

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Then the private detective set the briefcase down on a

small table and lifted the lid. He pulled out photos of Luis
posing in the nude. None had erections, and most were
photos of Luis's ass in various seductive positions, but several
of them showed full frontal nudity. He passed the photos to
Luis and Jase, and Barry turned around to give them a false
sense of privacy. In some photos, Luis was alone, either
standing in front of a window or sprawled out on a black
leather sofa face down, with his back arched and his legs
spread wide. In others, he was sitting on an older man's lap
and the older man was rubbing his ass.

Jase gritted his teeth and ripped the photos in half, then

threw them back at the private detective and told his father,
"I already know about these photos. Luis told me all about
them when we first met." It was true. Luis had mentioned
he'd posed in the nude for one of his older clients when he'd
first moved to New York. At the time, he didn't have enough
money to rent an apartment and this was his only way of
getting it. But there hadn't been any sex between Luis and
the older man. Luis had just removed all his clothes and he
posed while the older man admired his body.

Barry turned and shook his head. "You still want to marry

this person?" He glanced at Luis and frowned. "He had sex
with old men for money and this doesn't bother you?"

Luis looked down at his shoes.
"He didn't have sex with him," Jase shouted. "He only

posed in the nude. He needed the money in order to survive.
I'm not going to judge him any more than I'd judge anyone

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for making his way in the world. If I had been in his position I
probably would have done the same thing."

"You believed him?" Barry asked. "You honestly believe he

didn't have sex with older men and he just posed for them?"

At this point, Jase raised his arm and made a fist. But Luis

reached for his arm, grabbed it, and said, "Jase, don't." Then
he looked at Barry and said, "I don't blame you for not
believing me, Mr. Nicholas. I probably wouldn't believe it
myself. But it's the truth, no matter how strange it sounds.
The older man in the photo had just been discharged from the
hospital. He'd had his prostate removed and he was hoping
they'd removed all the cancer with it. He couldn't have had
sex with me if he'd wanted to. He only wanted to remember
what sex was like, and I helped him, without actually doing
anything at all." Luis turned to the private detective. "I have
no idea how you found those photos. The older man I was
with was the only one who had copies and he passed away
more than a year ago from cancer."

Jase lowered his arms and took a few deep breaths. He'd

never once lifted a hand to his father, but now he wanted to
flatten him right there in the shed.

Barry didn't say a word to Luis. He didn't acknowledge his

explanation. He turned to Jase and said, "I can only imagine
what else is floating around out there about this guy. You're
an internationally known public figure, Jase. When they start
digging around for more photos and things like this, your
reputation will be destroyed, this kid will leave you, and you'll
wind up a lonely middle-aged man. It's not too late to end all
this right now. All you have to do is pack up his bags, put him

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on a plane back to New York, and we'll tell your mother and
grandmother he changed his mind about getting married."

"You've never accepted the fact that I'm gay," Jase said.

"That's what this is all about."

Barry's eyes opened wide. "It has nothing to do with you

being gay," he said. He pointed to Luis. "It has to do with you
getting tangled up with a young male prostitute in his early
twenties who is only going after you for your money."

Jase clenched his fists again. He'd been waiting for his

father to say it out loud, and he'd finally done it.

"Jase, don't," Luis said. "He's your father."
"I could flatten you right now," Jase said, walking up to

Barry, looking into his eyes. He was so close he felt his
father's breath on his lips. "But I won't." Then he stepped
back and put his arm around Luis. "Here's what's going to
happen. I'm going back into the house and Luis is going
upstairs to take a hot bath. Since you didn't bother to ask
why he's wet, I'll tell you. He fell off the boat today and
nearly drowned."

Barry looked at Luis and tilted his head.
Jase continued speaking. "Tomorrow I'm going to marry

him, here in Alaska, to please my mother and my
grandmother, then I'm going back to New York and I'm
getting as far away from you as possible. I hope I never have
to lay eyes on you again."

"Jase," Luis said. "Maybe we can work this out. This is

wrong. He's your father."

But Jase didn't want to listen to any more. He grabbed Luis

by the arm and yanked him to the door. He knew what a

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vicious man his father could be. He'd seen Barry eat people
up and spit them out without as much as a nod. Without
looking back, he walked outside and pulled the door so hard
one of the window panes shattered into a million little pieces.

* * * *

When they went up to their bedroom, Luis walked over to

the loveseat and sat down. He was still wearing the blanket
from the boat and his clothes were still damp. He sat with his
knees pressed together and looked down at the floor. Jase
paced back and forth in front of the fireplace, with clenched
fists and heavy steps.

"Maybe this is wrong, Jase," Luis said.
Jase stopped, turned, and faced him with a blank stare.

"What are you talking about?"

Luis exhaled. "I have no idea how your father got those

photos. Maybe there are more like them out there. You have
a good reputation and mine is questionable at best. Before I
came to Alaska I had no idea your family had a good
reputation to maintain, too. I did what I had to do to survive,
but sometimes the past comes back to haunt us. I don't want
to cause anyone else any embarrassment. And I don't want to
be the cause of you never seeing your family again. It would
kill your mother."

"My father had no right to go poking around in my

business," Jase said. "I'm not a child anymore. I'm not going
to be treated like one. And I'm not going to allow him to treat
you this way."

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Luis smiled. "I appreciate what you're doing. And I love

you for it. But I don't want to be the reason you never speak
to your father again, and I couldn't let you do that to your
mother or grandmother."

Jase glared at him. "You're not the reason. This goes much

deeper. It's about the way my father laughs at the way I've
made my money. It's about the way he's never taken me
seriously. It's about the way he's always tried to control my
life." He punched a pillow next to the hearth. "I'm not going
to take it anymore."

Luis stood up. He seemed too exhausted to discuss this.

"I'm going to take a long hot shower, then a nap."

Though he'd wanted to draw a hot bath for Luis, he wasn't

in the mood anymore. So he nodded and said, "I'm going for
a long walk."

At dinner, it was only Luis, Jase, and Isabelle. Mary and

Barry went out to dinner alone to pre-celebrate their
anniversary. Jase noticed Luis was quiet. He kept pushing his
food around and avoiding eye contact. Then after dinner, they
went into the family room to watch a movie and he barely
said two words throughout the film. If Isabelle noticed
something wrong, she never mentioned it aloud. She was too
busy talking about the party and the wedding. They would
watch twenty minutes of the movie, and she would blurt out
something wedding- or party-related, about flowers or food.
It was obvious she wasn't paying attention to the movie, and
just as obvious she had no idea what had happened between
Jase and his father. When she finally stood up and stretched
her arms, it was almost eleven o'clock.

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Jase stood and yawned. He couldn't wait to be alone with

Luis. After all that had happened that day, the only thing he
wanted to do was go up to his room and make love. He
wanted to put aside his father, Luis's insecurities, and all this
talk about weddings and parties. He knew if he could just hold
Luis in his arms everything would be all right again. If he'd
had his way, they would have packed their bags, left for New
York, and forgotten all about the wedding and the party.

But Isabelle had other plans. When Jase and Luis started

walking out of the room, Isabelle grabbed Jase's arm and
said, "Oh no, you don't." She pulled Jase back and pointed to
Luis. "You go upstairs to the bedroom alone tonight. You two
are not to see each other until the ceremony. It's tradition."
Then she walked out of the room and told Jase to follow her.

Jase knew his grandmother was serious, and he didn't

want to upset her or disappoint her. So he flashed Luis an
apologetic look and shrugged. "Doesn't look like we have any
choice."

Luis laughed. "If you don't go, she's going to come back

for you."

Jase looked into his eyes. "I'll see you tomorrow?" He

smiled, but left a definite question mark on the end of the
sentence this time.

"We're good," Luis said. "Don't worry. Go get some sleep."

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Chapter Fifteen

In the morning, Luis woke in the middle of the bed, alone

and confused about what he was about to do that day. He'd
only been in Alaska for a few days and his entire life had
changed. For reasons he hadn't considered before, taking
actual wedding vows, legal or not, made all the difference in
the world. If he'd just been living with Jase he could have
rationalized everything differently. But now that he was about
to walk down the aisle and stand before Jase's friends and
family with a minister, the magnitude hit him hard and he
wasn't sure he could go through with it. He didn't want to
cause these people any more harm than he already had.
Trey, Jase's old friend, wouldn't have caused this kind of
trouble. Barry would have been slapping Trey on the back and
calling him son by now.

So he sat down at the desk and opened his laptop. There

was plenty of time before he had to be dressed and
downstairs. He wrote a few fast superficial posts on Elena's
blog to satisfy his readers, without going into any details
about what was really happening in Alaska. This was too
personal to put in a blog post; there were parts of his life with
Jase he didn't want to share with anyone. He was hoping he'd
find the sense of peace and contentment he'd always found
when he went to Elena's blog. This had been his safety net
since he'd left Tennessee and moved to New York. But when
he read all the comments and messages from people wishing
him well, it only made the pain in his stomach worse. He

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didn't even bother to notice whether or not Elena had posted
something new.

After he wrote the blog post and thanked his readers, he

checked his e-mail. He sent Elena a message and thanked her
for leaving a voice mail on his phone. She was such a
sweetheart; he knew she meant well and didn't have the
slightest clue as to what he was experiencing in Alaska. He
didn't have the heart or the energy to explain all the
complications.

Then he opened another e-mail from his agent. He hadn't

checked all ten messages that had been left on his voice mail;
his agent had left another message he'd missed. The e-mail
said his agent had landed the modeling job with the discount
department store and they'd discuss the contract when he
returned to New York. Luis smiled and took a quick breath of
relief. Normally, this news would have had him jumping
around in circles. He'd been vying for this modeling job for
what seemed like a lifetime. But all he felt was quiet
gratitude, not elation. So he replied to his agent and thanked
him for getting him the job, then said he'd get in touch with
him early next week when he was back in New York.

When it was time to get dressed, he put on his black

Versace suit and stared at his image in a long mirror beside
the antique armoire. Luis and Jase had brought black suits to
wear to the anniversary/birthday party, never imagining
they'd be wearing these suits to their own wedding. He'd
noticed Jase's suit was missing. Someone must have come
into the bedroom to get it while he'd been in the bathroom.
Probably Isabelle. He thought about Jase looking into a mirror

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somewhere else in the house, and he wondered what was
going on in Jase's mind that morning.

At noon, he looked out the window and saw most of the

guests were filing into the barn for the ceremony. Isabelle
and Mary must have made the announcement about the
surprise wedding as each guest arrived. So he took one fast
look in the mirror and crossed to the bedroom door. Then he
took a quick breath, exhaled, and went downstairs to meet
Jase in the barn.

By the time he arrived at the barn, the guests were seated

and Isabelle was waiting for him at the door. He saw the red-
haired detective standing near the back. He was talking to
someone Luis didn't know, telling the guy he couldn't get a
flight back to New York until the afternoon. Luis took a deep
breath and ignored him. He had more important things to
worry about now. Nothing had been planned or rehearsed. He
wasn't sure what to do or where to go. How they had
managed to turn the barn into a small wedding chapel in such
a short amount of time was anyone's guess. There were white
flowers and ribbons everywhere. The lighting was dim, with
hundreds of candles flickering all over the barn. There were
even white ribbons and bows on the back of each guest chair.
The large wreath of dried flowers Mary had purchased in town
was hanging above the altar.

"Everything looks magical," Luis told Isabelle, staring

every which way. "I can't believe you did all this in such a
short amount of time."

But Isabelle smiled and reached for his arm. She looked

adorable in her fake fur-trimmed sweatsuit and rhinestone

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earrings. "I'm the one giving you away," she said. "Hope
that's okay. I insisted since we both have so much in
common."

"What do we have in common?" He tilted his head to the

side. He couldn't imagine.

"My husband's father, Clarence Nicholas, wasn't too

thrilled about me, let me tell you." She patted his arm and
smiled. "It's time to roll."

Luis's eyes opened wide. He had no idea he'd actually be

walking down an aisle and someone would be giving him
away. He'd assumed he'd meet Jase at the makeshift altar at
the other end of the barn and they'd take their vows without
any pomp and circumstance. But he couldn't refuse Isabelle.
She was looking up at him, with her elbow pointed to his
chest, waiting for him to loop his arm through hers so they
could walk down the aisle together. So he smiled and said,
"I'm glad you're walking me down the aisle. I'm honored."
When he thought about it, having Isabelle walk him down the
aisle was apropos. There was nothing traditional about what
they were doing, and having the grandmother of the groom
give him away only made the ceremony more interesting.

When they reached the end of the aisle, someone from

above started playing Canon in D on an organ. It wasn't a
real organ, just speakers that sounded real. The guests
turned in their seats to watch Luis and Isabelle approach the
altar. This was a surprise for them all. They'd never expected
they'd be going to a gay wedding, and most of them just sat
there gaping and murmuring to each other. Luis could almost
hear their thoughts. Oh, that Mary Nicholas, she's a tricky

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one. Inviting us to an anniversary/birthday party and telling
us at the last minute it's really a gay wedding for her gay son.
They had to be in shock. Luis had never seen so many wide
eyes and half-open mouths in the same room.

Isabelle took the first step and Luis followed, feeling

lightheaded and flushed. She leaned into his side and said,
"Don't be nervous. Let them stare. I was knocked up when I
walked down this aisle and in those days and that was just as
shocking at this is."

He knew she meant to make him feel better, but his heart

only started pounding faster after she said that.

As they crept along and the music played, Isabelle kept

her head high and her upper lip stiff. She smiled and nodded
to people she knew as if she were walking her new
granddaughter-in-law down the aisle instead of her
grandson's gay lover. Though Luis didn't know anyone, he did
recognize a few faces. The woman politician he'd seen
chanting and grunting in the woods was sitting in one of the
middle rows with her husband and family. He could only
imagine what she was thinking. Ambushed and bamboozled
into something like this and no way out of it. But when he
looked in her direction, she smiled at him and winked.

Then he saw Trey sitting alone on the other side of the

barn. Their eyes locked for a second, a sensation of sheer
panic passed through Luis's body, and then Trey smiled at
him. Two steps later, Luis noticed the sneaky little red-
headed private detective was sitting toward the back with a
creepy grin on his face. Though he'd probably never find out,

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he couldn't help wondering how the little troll had found those
nude photos of him.

But all thoughts left Luis's mind when he looked forward.

The only one in the entire room who mattered at all to Luis
was standing at the other end of the barn, with his strong
legs parted and his rugged hands folded below his waist. Luis
looked up and smiled at him. Jase sent him a tender look. As
Luis approached the altar, Isabelle released his arm and Jase
reached down for his hand. Then Isabelle went to the front
row to sit beside Mary and Barry while Luis stepped up and
stood beside Jase.

When they turned to face the minister, the music stopped

and the barn became silent. Someone coughed. The minister
cleared his throat and said, "We're gathered here today, in
front of friends and family, to witness something we don't see
very often. I'm sure it's probably a first for most of you, in
fact. And even though it's not legal in the eyes of the law, I
truly believe it's a spiritual bond that can't be broken in the
eyes of all that is good and decent about the world."

As the minister continued to speak, Luis's mind drifted

again. He started thinking about the nude photos and how
much Barry hated and disapproved of him. He couldn't stop
thinking about how Mary and Isabelle would react if they
knew everything about his past, or about the fight Jase had
just had with his father over the nude photos. Posing for the
photos had seemed so harmless and innocent at the time,
and now it looked so sordid and tawdry. His heart raced and
his temples pounded. They'd never understand why Luis done
the things he'd done in order to survive. Their worlds were so

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sheltered and separated from things like selling used
underwear, drug-dealing real estate agents, and posing nude
for older gay men who didn't have prostates. They still
thought getting pregnant before the wedding was a scandal.

Little did they know there was worse coming, something

that would make Barry explode: Luis had done a soft-core
porn flick once to make money. There hadn't been any
penetration, and Jase already knew about it, but when he
considered how all this might come out in the future, his
heart started to race and his mouth went dry. When he
thought about the pain and embarrassment it might cause all
these good people, he knew he had to do something fast.
Barry was probably right. Luis was ruining Jase's life, and
everyone else's while he was at it.

So he interrupted the minister and he turned to look at

Jase. "I have to say something. I can't do this, Jase. It will
wind up tearing you and your family apart."

"Don't do this, Luis." Jase said in a low voice.
Luis ignored him. He turned completely around and faced

the guests. When he looked down at them and saw their
curious expressions, he took a deep breath and exhaled. They
were really in for a show now. Not only was it their first gay
marriage, but also the first gay marriage where one groom
leaves the other standing at the altar.

He cleared his throat and said, "I came to Alaska thinking

I'd just meet Jase's family and we'd go right back to our lives
in New York without any changes or alterations," Luis said.
"But I was wrong. I had no idea what I was in for."

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"Please," Jase said. He spoke in a whisper. Only Luis could

hear him.

The guests were smiling. Most thought he was about to

make a tender speech about how important this ceremony
was and how much he appreciated everything Isabelle and
Mary had done to make it work.

But they stopped smiling when Luis said, "As most of you

already know, I was falsely arrested last year for drug dealing
and all the charges were dropped. I got mixed up with the
wrong people and never saw it coming. I was innocent. But I
haven't led a completely perfect life."

He looked into the audience and stared at Barry. He wasn't

going to go into detail about his past, and he didn't care
about what the guests thought, but he wanted Jase's family
to understand why he was doing this. "I'm not proud of the
things I've done. I thought it would be simple to just walk up
here and take vows. But now I know it's not easy to ruin
someone's life. This is marriage. It's one of the most
important steps anyone can take in life."

When he took a moment to pause, he saw Mary and

Isabelle exchange stunned glances. Barry reached for Mary's
hand and squeezed it tightly as if he knew what was coming.

Luis smiled at Mary. "You have a wonderful family, and

you're a wonderful woman. I had no idea Jase came from
such wonderful people." He turned to face Barry. "I just
always thought of Jase as this workaholic dynamo that never
stopped. His life in Alaska wasn't real until I actually saw it
myself. I now know where he got this strong work ethic: from
his father. And I don't want to see anything or anyone come

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between Jase and his family." Then he turned and looked into
Jase's eyes. "You taught me how to stop being afraid. You've
helped me grow in ways I never thought I could. But it's just
not meant to be. You have a life here. You have family. And I
don't belong."

While the guests turned to each other and started

whispering, Luis lowered his head and stepped down from the
altar. On his way out, he looked at Mary and said, "I'm so
sorry." He kept walking and didn't look back.

Jase didn't come running after him, which confirmed his

belief he'd just done the right thing.

When he reached the end of the aisle, he glared at the

red-headed private detective and said, "I'm going back to
New York with you. Meet me at the docks in fifteen minutes
and take me to the airport." He walked out of the barn with
his head held high.

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Chapter Sixteen

Isabelle didn't know where to look, so she turned sideways

and kept moving her head back and forth as if it were hinged
to her neck with rusty bolts. When Luis was finally out of the
barn, she sighed and laced her fingers together across her
lap. "My God, that's tough. He stood him up."

Barry's head went up and he smiled. "No point in us

remaining."

But Mary glared at him, then stood up and crossed to

where Jase was still standing at the altar. "Did you know
about all this? What on earth was Luis talking about, Jase?"

The minister turned and walked to the side, looking down

at floor the entire time.

While the guests murmured to each other, Isabelle gave

Barry a nasty look, and then she stood and walked over to
Jase. "What was he thinking?" She was talking about Luis.
Her arms were up high and spread apart. "No one's perfect."

Jase didn't look them in the eye. He couldn't. The best he

could do was stand there in front of all the guests and control
his emotions so this wedding wouldn't become even more of a
spectacle. His lips were still parted and his face was still
blank. He couldn't stop staring at the other end of the barn.
The entire time he'd watched Luis leave he couldn't move his
legs. When his mother reached for his arm, he pulled back
and said, "I'll explain everything later. I just have to clear my
head right now." He had to get out of there and find Luis.

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He left the barn and walked back to the house. His face felt

flushed and his teeth remained clenched. Luis should have
talked to him first. How could he do this? How could he be so
damn selfish? Luis should have trusted him enough to know
he'd help him work it out. Jase didn't care about Luis's past.
Was Luis worried about the soft-core porn film he'd made?
Though Luis done a few things some people would consider
questionable, Jase knew for certain Luis had never done
anything seriously wrong. All this was part of the reason Jase
loved and respected him. If he'd been boring Jase never
would have been interested in him in the first place. It was
the quirky little things that made Jade's heart pound
whenever Luis walked into a room.

And he'd always admired Luis's quiet strength. Luis had

figured out a way to not only survive in a place like New York
City on his own, he'd figured out ways to thrive there without
doing anything that would seriously compromise his integrity.
Jase didn't care what people thought. The last thing Jase
cared about was tabloids and reporters. Even if Luis's nude
photos or his soft-core film did surface in public, Jase would
have turned his head and ignored them.

He stormed into their bedroom with his fists clenched and

his jaw locked. He was prepared to really give it to Luis this
time. But all he found in the bedroom was an empty armoire
and a short note on the bed. The note was folded in half. And
on top of the note was Luis's engagement ring.

Jase picked up the ring and put it in his pocket. He lifted

the note slowly and read aloud. You're the most wonderful
man I've ever known. I want you to be happy and have all

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the things you deserve in life. I wish I had a father who loved
me as much as your father loves you. Don't be too hard on
him. I truly believe he means well. Love, Luis

While he read the note again, Trey stepped into the

bedroom. He seemed to appear from nowhere to offer Jase
comfort. "You certainly do know how to upstage me. I
thought everyone would be shocked when I moved back to
Alaska and they found out the new pediatrician in town is
gay. But this wedding is something they'll be telling their
grandchildren about for years to come."

Jase knew Trey only wanted to help. Trey was trying to

make him smile, but it wasn't working. He lifted the note and
shook it. "How dare he leave me this way, without even as
much as an explanation? Oh, I should have known. He's
always been this way: flighty and carefree and breezy. Does
whatever he wants and goes wherever he pleases. He's like a
feather that just floats off in the direction of the wind and
doesn't care which way it's blowing. Did you know he once
almost left New York to live with this old guy in Vancouver?
Did you know he didn't name his dog until last year? He just
called him 'doggie.' Now what kind of a person, I ask you,
lives his life this way? He's one of the smartest people I've
ever known, yet he has no common sense sometimes when it
comes to practical things. He's been driving me insane since
the first day I met him." Jase wasn't shouting anymore. If
anything, he sounded ready to surrender, because these were
the very things he loved most about Luis. "After all we've
been through together I can't believe he'd just run off and
leave me standing at the altar."

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Trey shrugged. He crossed the room, put his arms around

Jase, and kissed him on the cheek. "Are you willing to just let
him go?" Then he patted his back and smiled, as if he knew
an amusing secret Jase hadn't quite figured out yet.

Jase stepped back and shoved the note into his pocket. He

slapped Trey on the back and ran downstairs to the back of
the house where all the tables had been set up for the
reception. When he stepped outside, heads turned and people
stared. He didn't care. He jogged to where his family was
standing and reached for his mother's arm. "I have to go
after him. I'll be back later."

His mother called his name. But he just kept walking.
Barry slammed his drink on a table and said, "You've got

to be joking. After all this and you're still going to run after
him?"

Jase didn't look back. "Leave me alone, Dad. I know what

I'm doing."

Barry followed. "This is insane. Think about what you're

doing. He's an escort. He's half your age. Be realistic."

Jase was about to turn and grab his father by the throat.

But he stopped short when he heard his grandmother's voice.
"I think it's a heart attack."

Then Mary shouted, "Mom."
By the time Barry and Jase turned, Mary had a hold of

Isabelle's arm. Isabelle's knees were buckling and she was
slowly sinking to the grass. She clutched the middle of her
sweatshirt with both hands. Her face was red and her lips
were scrunched up as if she were in pain.

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When Jase reached her, he helped his mother lower her

onto the grass. He kneeled behind her and held her head in
his palms. Then someone shouted, "I just called an
ambulance."

* * * *

When the sea plane pulled up to the dock, a group of well-

trained paramedics jumped out and placed Isabelle on a
gurney. They hooked her up to oxygen and loaded her onto
the plane. Barry, Mary, and Jase jumped into the plane to be
with her. Though Jase and Barry still wouldn't look each other
in the eye, they were civil. Everyone's main concern was
getting Isabelle to a hospital and making sure she got the
care she needed. But she was ninety years old. If this was a
serious heart attack, Jase knew there wasn't much hope.

Mary reached down for Isabelle's hand and held it tightly.

Isabelle's eyes were closed and she wasn't responding to
anyone. "You're going to be fine, Mom," she kept repeating
over and over, as if trying to reassure herself.

While all the guests stood back and watched, the plane

took off and headed to the hospital. Jase frowned and stared
down at his grandmother's face. Though she had more
wrinkles than he'd remembered from the last time he'd been
to Alaska, she wasn't pale and she didn't have that ashen
look most sick people get. He figured it was because she was
wearing more make-up than usual. But when she opened her
eyes and looked up at him, his body jerked and he pressed
his palm to his chest.

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She pulled the oxygen mask down to her chin and cleared

her throat. When she said Barry's name, her voice came off
as hoarse and feeble.

"Don't talk, Mom-mom," Jase said. "Save your strength."
"What is it, Mom?" Mary asked. "Don't try to talk. We're on

our way to the hospital. You're going to be fine and anything
you have to say can wait until later."

"I have to speak now," Isabelle said, suffering through

each syllable. "I don't know how long I have left."

Jase sent his mother a sympathetic glance. Though Mary

was trying hard to be strong and keep things positive, her
face continued to grow tighter and her voice kept trailing into
a whisper at the end of each sentence.

Isabelle turned her head to the right. She pointed at Barry

with a shaky finger. "I want you to promise me you'll work
hard at accepting Jase's lifestyle and his decisions. I don't
want you forcing your ways on him anymore. He's a grown
man and he's done well for himself. You have to let him live
his own life now."

Barry gulped. His face tightened and he scowled. "I

promise, Mom." He swallowed. The words seemed to stick in
the back of his throat.

Then Isabelle looked at Jase. She pointed a crooked finger

at him. "And I want you to promise me you'll work harder to
get along with your father, and that you'll never turn your
back on your family. You've been doing these disappearing
acts for years. And it's time for it to stop. You have a family
that loves you."

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Jase closed his eyes and nodded. "I promise, Mom-mom."

He would have agreed to anything by then. She looked so
frail and helpless. He wanted to pick her up and cradle her in
his arms.

Mary put her arm around Jase and kissed him on the

cheek. It seemed as if Isabelle had been able to sum up
everything Mary had wanted to say all along in just a few
words.

"Good," Isabelle said. "I'm ready to die in peace and meet

my maker." Then she covered her mouth with the oxygen
mask, adjusted her head on the gurney, and closed her eyes.

While Isabelle seemed to be sinking back into a state of

oblivion, Mary grabbed Isabelle's hand and wiped a tear from
her own eye. Jase leaned forward and gazed down at his
grandmother's face, silently praying she wouldn't die. He
knew she'd lived a good, long life. But it was still too soon to
lose her. No matter how old she grew, it always would be.

Barry rubbed his eyes and clutched the back of the seat.

He seemed to be having trouble keeping his composure.

But a minute later, Isabelle opened her eyes and yanked

off the oxygen mask. She sat up on the gurney and rubbed
her palms together. "Well, I guess my maker isn't ready to
meet me yet. I'm starting to feel a lot better now." She
turned to the pilot and said, "Take us to the airport, please."

Mary released Isabelle's hand and blinked.
Jase lowered his eyebrows and tilted his head to the side.
Barry was the first one to speak. "My God, Mom. Are you

telling me you just faked a heart attack?"

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"It was the only way to get you two idiots to stop fighting

so we could get to the airport in time to stop Luis," Isabelle
said. She was smiling and her eyes were bright and clear.

The pilot wasn't pleased about this turn of events. "I can't

go to the airport now. This is serious business, Mrs. Nicholas."

But Isabelle pointed at him and shook her finger. "I've

known you since you were a little boy, Bobby Ransome. You
do as I say or I'll give your mother a call tomorrow and she'll
deal with you. We're going to the airport. If there's a charge,
you can send me the bill."

Jase turned to his mother and sighed. He took a deep

breath and exhaled. Mary put her arm around his shoulders
and squeezed him gently. Evidently, Mary didn't see anything
wrong with Isabelle faking a heart attack so they could get to
the airport and track Luis down before he left Alaska.

Barry was another story. When Jase looked in Barry's

direction, he wasn't smiling. His fists were clenched and his
eyes were bulging. He looked out the window, over Isabelle's
head, without saying a word.

* * * *

When they reached the small airport in Palmer and the sea

plane landed, Jase was the first one to jump out of the plane.
He wasn't sure what time the flights to Anchorage were
leaving that day and he was hoping he'd get lucky and find
Luis waiting there. But when he turned and saw a small jet
gliding down the runway, he knew Luis had to be on that
plane. So he reached for his phone and called the tower. He

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knew the local air traffic controller. His name was Eddie
Bertrand and he'd gone to high school with Jase.

"Eddie, this is Jase Nicholas. Can you do me a big favor?"

He figured if he could stop the small jet from taking off he'd
get a chance to talk to Luis. He couldn't let him leave this
way. When he thought about what the rest of his life would
be without Luis, his stomach pulled so hard he wanted to
double over in pain.

"Hey Jase," Eddie said. His tone was light and playful. But

it sounded muffled, as if he was eating something. "I heard all
about what happened today."

Jase frowned. News traveled fast in small Alaska towns. He

could picture Eddie sitting up there in the tower, with his chair
back and his legs propped up on the desk, gossiping about
him on the phone. Eddie had never been the ambitious type;
there weren't many planes leaving Palmer that afternoon. "I
know, Eddie," he said. "But I need a favor. Can you stop the
plane that's about to take off right now?" He looked to his
right. The plane was picking up speed. He had to stop it
before Luis left.

"Buddy," Eddie said. "You know I can't do that. There's no

way."

And by the time Eddie finished the sentence, Jase watched

the front of Luis's plane rise into the air and take off for
Anchorage. He closed his eyes for a second, then said, "No.
Damn it."

His family wasn't far away. Jase heard his grandmother

say, "Oh no. This is awful." Then he heard his father say,

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"Maybe it's for the best. Maybe Luis doesn't love him." Barry's
tone had mellowed by then, as if he felt sorry for Jase.

But Mary turned and said, "It's not for the best, Barry.

How can you be so blind? Luis left because he loves Jase too
much to hurt him." Barry looked confused. But Isabelle
pointed to Jase and said, "Look at how much Jase loves him.
It just breaks my heart to see this happen. It could have been
such a perfect day."

Barry finally lowered his head and shrugged his shoulders.

He seemed to get the big picture for the first time since Luis
and Jase had arrived in Alaska.

They walked up to where Jase was standing to comfort

him. He was still holding his phone and watching the plane
disappear into the sky. He was too stunned to cry. He couldn't
move his legs or turn his head to face his family.

Barry spoke first. "I'm sorry, son. I didn't know how he felt

about you. I honestly thought he was just after you for your
money and all this was a whim that would pass. Evidently, I
was wrong."

Mary scowled at him and shook her head.
Jase knew his father was sincere this time. He also knew

his father had been looking out for his best interest. Without
turning, Jase said, "I know, Dad. Thanks."

Then Jase put his phone back into his jacket, stared down

at the ground, and shuffled back to the sea plane with his
hands in his pockets.

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Chapter Seventeen

Two days later, Luis woke at dawn without knowing where

he was. This confused, displaced feeling only lasted for a
second or two, but it caused a flash of panic that passed
through his entire body and left his heart racing. He bolted
from the mattress so fast poor Camp jumped up and barked
at the window. When Luis finally realized he was back in his
old apartment on the Upper West Side, he pulled off his sleep
mask and rubbed his eyes.

He looked down at the bed and frowned. There weren't

any sheets; he'd used his suitcase and his clothes for a pillow
and covers. When he looked up, he saw the walls were bare,
the smudged windows were without curtains, and there was a
porcelain lamp with painted red roses on the floor without a
shade.

The day before this, the minute he'd landed in New York,

he went to the apartment in Trump Tower and cleared out all
his things. Luis had never been a pack rat and almost
everything he owned in the world fit into two old suitcases
and three cardboard boxes. He left a note letting Jase know
whatever he left behind Jase could keep. On the way out, he
handed his key to the doorman and hailed a taxi. After he
loaded the backseat of the cab, he told the driver to take him
back to his old neighborhood near Riverside Park.

When they arrived there, he asked the driver to wait until

he spoke with his old landlord, Mr. Gordon. Luis wasn't even
sure his old apartment was available. Even if it was, he wasn't

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sure Mr. Gordon would allow him to move back into the
building after all that unpleasantness with the police and
reporters, which had happened almost a year earlier. When
he pressed the buzzer, he kept his fingers crossed.

Mr. Gordon answered the door with his arms folded across

his chest. He stared at Luis with a half smile and a wary
expression and asked him to come into the vestibule. When
Luis asked if he could rent his old apartment again, Mr.
Gordon flatly refused. He told Luis he didn't want trouble and
he liked his building quiet. His nerves were brittle and he
didn't want anymore "upsetment" in his life. But Luis didn't
stop there. He had nowhere else to go and he needed to be
where he felt the most comfortable. After a good deal of
sweet-talking, he finally persuaded Mr. Gordon to let him
come back. The fact that he wrote Mr. Gordon a check for six
months' rent up front helped. But what really cinched the deal
was when he unbuckled his jeans, pulled them down to his
knees, and innocently adjusted his shirt while Mr. Gordon
stared at his underwear. He'd been wearing the tight white
mesh bikini briefs. They were practically see-through.

Luis had been hoping to sleep late his first morning back in

New York. He'd been through so much in Alaska his head still
felt as if it was spinning. He wasn't starting the new modeling
job until later that month, so he had plenty of free time on his
hands. If he'd been able to, he would have spent the rest of
that day in bed, with the sleep mask over his eyes and his
telephone turned off. But the suitcase hurt his neck and his
old mattress didn't feel the same anymore. Besides, Camp
was poking his leg to go out for a walk.

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Nothing about his old apartment was the same. Except for

the mattress, all of his things were gone and it had a vacant,
lonely feeling. The tenant who had rented the apartment after
Luis had lived there for eight months and he'd skipped out in
the middle of the night without paying Mr. Gordon two
months' rent he owed. He'd left nothing behind except the old
mattress, a rickety table and chair, three cans of sardines,
and an orange bean bag chair that looked as if it had lost half
its beans.

Luis looked around and scowled. Then he crawled out of

bed and dressed fast. It was still warm enough in New York to
go out for a walk in the early morning in just a T-shirt and
jeans. He hadn't been for a walk in Riverside Park in a long
time. He thought about calling Ben and Percy to meet him
there, but then realized he'd have to explain everything that
had happened in Alaska and he just wasn't up to it yet. He
wasn't even in the mood to open his laptop and see what was
happening on Elena's blog. He knew people were dying to
know all about Alaska, but he wasn't ready to put it down in
writing. And he wasn't sure he ever would be. There was a
strong chance he'd never go back to Elena's blog again. This
was the best thing about the Internet. A person could just
drop off without any explanation at all and no one could ever
find them again.

In the kitchen, he noticed an old coffee maker on the

counter, but there wasn't any coffee. So he fastened Camp's
leash to his collar and started for the door. He'd pick up
coffee at the corner grocery. On the way back he'd stop at a
few markets and stock up the refrigerator. Though he'd fed

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Camp, he hadn't eaten a thing since he'd left Alaska. The last
thing he felt like doing was sitting all alone in a restaurant.

But as Luis reached for the handle, the buzzer beside the

door went off. He stepped back and waited for a moment.
Whoever it was would probably just go away. No one in New
York knew he was there, so it couldn't be for him. It was
probably one of the other tenants who forgot their key. He'd
done this plenty of times in the past. All you had to do was
push a few buttons and eventually someone would buzz you
inside.

Then he heard Mr. Gordon open his door and come out in

the hall. "I told you I don't want any more of this. You're only
here one night and this is what I have to deal with. Oh, I
knew I was making a mistake when I let you come back. Next
thing I know the cops will be here."

As far as Luis knew, he hadn't done anything wrong. He

couldn't understand why Mr. Gordon would be shouting at
him already. He hadn't been there long enough to forget his
key. And Mr. Gordon was exaggerating about the police.
They'd only been there a couple of times a month when he'd
lived there alone, and most of those times were because of
noisy but harmless parties. The drug raid had only been a
one-time thing, and it was so ridiculous Luis could never
understand why Mr. Gordon got so worked up about it.

So he stepped into the hall and looked up. Mr. Gordon was

leaning over the rail, wearing his bathrobe and slippers,
pointing and shaking his arm. He glared at Luis and said, "You
promised me this wouldn't happen. I should have known
better."

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Luis stood there gaping at him, shrugging his shoulders.

"What are you talking about? I just woke up. I haven't even
left the building." He'd never seen anyone get so worked up
about a buzzer.

Then Camp barked and a voice from the stairwell said,

"He's talking about me."

Luis turned fast and pressed his palm to his throat. Camp

ran to the stairs and started wagging his tail and running in
circles. Luis saw Jase standing on the landing, leaning into the
newel post with a blank expression. His face was red and
there were beads of perspiration dripping from his temples.

"You're sweating," Luis said. "You're out of breath." He

wasn't sure what to say. After he'd left Jase standing at the
altar in Alaska, he didn't think he'd see him again.

"I've been running since the plane landed," Jase said. "I

would have been here yesterday, but I couldn't get a flight
out."

Luis couldn't move his legs. The lump in his throat grew

larger and he couldn't find his voice.

Mr. Gordon shook his fist. "You promised me," he said.

"You told me no more disruptions. I'm going to give you back
your check and I want you out today. It's final. I'm tired. I'm
putting this place up for sale and moving to Florida."

Jase rolled his eyes and looked up at Mr. Gordon with an

impatient stare. "The building is for sale?"

"Yes," Mr. Gordon said. "I'm tired. I don't want to deal with

this anymore."

"Would you sell it to me?" Jase asked.
Mr. Gordon nodded. "I'll sell it to anyone with the money."

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"Good," Jase said. "Then I'll buy the building today. I'll

give you a deposit this afternoon and we'll work the rest out
with our lawyers. But you have to do just one thing."

"What's that?" The old man tilted his head and pressed his

tongue to his cheek as if he didn't trust Jase.

"Shut the fuck up so I can find out why my fiance left me

standing at the altar yesterday in front of all my friends and
family like an idiot."

When Mr. Gordon heard this news, his jaw dropped and his

eyes softened. He shook his head at Luis and frowned. He
lifted both palms and said, "We can talk this afternoon. I'll sell
you the building. It's yours." Then he stepped back and
waited to see how Luis would react to what Jase had just
said.

"You can't buy this building," Luis said. "That's ridiculous."
Jase shrugged. "Watch me. These old buildings are being

restored all over the city. People are buying them, turning
them back into one-family homes, and selling them for huge
profits. I used to watch the renovations when I was living
here and you were out. It's been in the back of my mind since
then. I might even live here myself. I've never liked living in a
high-rise building. I love this neighborhood. It feels like home
to me."

"I guess I'll have to find another place to live," Luis said,

his tone low and even. He worked hard to remain
emotionless. He still felt he'd done the right thing by leaving
Jase.

Jase ignored the comment about finding another place.

"I'm curious about something," he said.

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"I can always ask Ben and Percy if I can stay there until I

find a place," Luis said. "Or I can just go to a hotel until I find
something." He had money of his own now from modeling.

"Just stop talking," Jase said. "I have a few things I'd like

to say." He took a deep breath and ran his palm through his
hair. "For the last year we've lived like a married couple. I
thought I knew who you were. I thought we'd worked almost
everything out. Then we take one trip to Alaska, we're not
even there more than a few days, and you turn into someone
completely different."

Luis hesitated. His eyes stung and his stomach jumped. He

had to clench his fists so he wouldn't cry. "It's better this
way, Jase. It's much easier for both of us. I'm the way I am
and I can't change. I never expected your life in Alaska to be
so full. I thought we'd just go there, visit, and go back to
normal. And when I found out you have this whole other life
up there, I didn't know how to fit in. I'm not exactly
conventional, and I'm certainly not like Trey Dawson."

"That's why I fell in love with you and asked you to marry

me. That's why I'm here right now asking you to marry me
again. If I wanted someone like Trey, I wouldn't have fallen in
love with someone like you. What is it about this concept you
can't grasp?"

Luis swallowed back hard. He felt a tear trickle down the

right side of his face. "You're the famous Virgin Billionaire. I'm
a low-end model who just got his old apartment back because
he showed the landlord his see-through underwear and
wiggled his ass a few times." He wanted to be honest. He
wanted Jase to know how he got his old apartment back.

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They hadn't even officially broken up and Luis was back to his
old ways, flirting and exposing his ass to get what he wanted.

Mr. Gordon covered his mouth with his palms as if he were

guilty, too.

But Jase only shrugged his shoulders and smiled. He took

a few steps closer and reached for Luis's arms. "If we get
married I'll just be your husband and you'll be mine. Those
are labels I can live with for the rest of my life."

"I think it would be better if we just let go of everything

that's happened in the past year and you went back to Alaska
and started dating Trey. He's much better for you, Jase. He
fits in with your family and your life back there. I don't."

Jase smiled. "You're right. It would be better, and Trey is

probably much better for me."

Luis felt shaky, as if he couldn't control his emotions a

minute longer. But Jase continued to gaze into Luis's eyes,
and the deeper he penetrated the more unstable Luis
became. "I'm terrified," Luis said. "I'm not sure I can live up
to your standards. Or your father's standards."

Jase reached for Luis's face with both hands. "I don't care

about standards. And my father is fine with you. We talked
about it before I left. He just wants me to be happy."

"He does?" Luis had a problem believing that.
"Yes, he does. My mother and grandmother love you. They

are already planning the holidays. They can't stop talking
about it. And for the first time in years I want to go home,
with you by my side."

Luis sighed. "I love your mother and grandmother. I'm

shocked at how much I love Alaska. I could live there and be

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very happy. But your father is important. I can't let myself
come between you. It wouldn't be right."

Jase nodded. "My father is fine. But even if he wasn't okay

with it, I wouldn't care. I only know I love you and I want to
marry you. We'll go to Vermont like we originally planned. I
want to spend the rest of my life with you." Then he leaned
forward and kissed Luis on the mouth.

When Jase's tongue met his, Luis's body relaxed and he

placed his palms on the back of Jase's neck. He knew he
couldn't fight his feelings any longer no matter how hard he
tried to be noble and sensible. He looked up for a second to
see if Mr. Gordon was still watching them.

Mr. Gordon was leaning against the rail, wiping his eyes

with a cloth handkerchief. He nodded at Luis and blew his
nose.

"We can't go to Vermont now," Luis said.
"Why?"
"It would kill your mother and grandmother."
"Then we'll get married in Alaska."
Luis smiled. "I'd like that."
"I want you right now," Jase said, while he placed Luis's

engagement ring back on his finger.

"I have to walk Camp."
"Leave the window open and let him out on the fire escape

like you used to."

Luis wanted Jase, too. But he said, "The apartment is a

mess. There's only a bed, an ugly old table, and an orange
bean bag chair." He was embarrassed to tell him how he'd

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slept the night before, with a suitcase pillow and a twill jacket
for a blanket.

"I don't care," Jase said. "I want to lose my virginity here

in this building, in this apartment where we met. I want to do
it right now. I've never wanted you more."

Luis's eyebrows went up. "Are you saying what I think

you're saying?"

Jase smiled and nodded. "I want to find out what it's like.

And I want you to be the first one. I'm tired of being a virgin."

Luis reached around and grabbed Jase's ass. "I want to be

the only one, not just the first one."

When they stopped kissing, Luis stepped to the right and

extended his arm. He placed his palm on his abdomen and
bowed. Jase had always been the one who stepped aside so
Luis could walk into a building or room first. But now that Luis
was about to switch roles with Jase in the bedroom, he felt it
was appropriate to make this little gesture. When he did, Jase
looked into his eyes and smiled, then crossed into the
apartment and turned right toward the bedroom. Camp
followed Jase inside, galloping and yelping all the way.

Though Luis wasn't sure how long this reversal of roles

would last, or if Jase would even want to go through with
being the bottom once he found out what it was really like to
have another man enter his body, Luis knew this was the
beginning of many new experiences to come. Nothing about
their relationship had ever been forced or embellished, and
that was what had always made it so special. If anything,
their love seemed to thrive even more when things became
difficult. Though the trip to Alaska had changed them both in

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ways Luis never could have imagined, he now realized it had
brought them even closer together. Jase would still be the
Virgin Billionaire to the world. But his heart and his virginity
would always belong to Luis.

THE END

* * * *


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