Missy Lyons Heart of a Cowboy

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Heart of a Cowboy

Derek is only working for a month to pay off his debt to Jessie, but
not everyone likes his openly homosexual lifestyle. He knows what

it feels like to be beaten to within an inch of his life so he doesn't
give a rat's ass what people think.

The attraction between him and the hunky Indian Ishwar is
instantly satisfying. He finds himself begging for more every

second he is near him, but when he falls into the arms of a
stranger, things only begin to heat up, until an unforeseen peril

puts him in danger.

Derek must prove he has the heart of a cowboy, and it will take
every ounce of love and strength in his heart to make it through

this ordeal alive.

Genre: Alternative (M/M or F/F)/Ménage a
Trois/Quatre/Western/Cowboys
Length: 31,291 words

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HEART OF A COWBOY




Missy Lyons






MENAGE AMOUR

Siren Publishing, Inc.

www.SirenPublishing.com

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A SIREN PUBLISHING BOOK
IMPRINT: Ménage Amour

HEART OF A COWBOY
Copyright © 2010 by Missy Lyons
E-book ISBN: 1-60601-463-3

First E-book Publication: August 2010

Cover design by Jinger Heaston
All cover art and logo copyright © 2010 by Siren Publishing, Inc.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: This literary work may not be reproduced or
transmitted in any form or by any means, including electronic or photographic
reproduction, in whole or in part, without express written permission.

All characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual
persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.


PUBLISHER
Siren Publishing, Inc.
www.SirenPublishing.com

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Letter from Missy Lyons

Regarding Ebook Piracy



Dear Readers,

Thank you for your recent purchase of my latest book, Heart of a Cowboy.
It’s been a labor of love that I am happy to share with you and thank you for
not sharing your copy of the book.

Piracy is a growing problem because most people don't even realize that
sharing or reselling an ebook that they purchased is illegal and a violation of
copyright law. If you are aware of illegal copies of this story circulating the
internet please feel free to notify the publisher, Siren-BookStrand, with the
link in the email or you can contact me directly through my website.

Please note by purchasing your copy of this book you are helping me to
maintain my career as a writer. Writing is how I support my family and I
live off the royalties from the sales of my books. Thank you again.

With deep gratitude,

Missy Lyons

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DEDICATION




Working from home is a lonely proposition. If it were not for the loving
support of my family and friends I don’t think Heart of a Cowboy or any of
my books would come into existence. I can’t speak for every other writer
but I needed a network that could help me stay sane as well as accountable
for finishing my stories.

My family is at the top of my list to give my thanks to. My adorable
husband helped by keeping the kids occupied when I got too close to my
deadlines and my nerves ended up frazzled. It was because of him that I
could take field trips with my book and refuel my brain cells with Starbucks
coffee.

Then there are the many others who spent hours helping me, critiquing, and
offering their words of wisdom and support. So thank you to Cherie, Jody,
Dahlia, Tricia, and to all the ladies in RD challenge and chat room. I
couldn’t forget to say thank you to my editor Alison and Siren Publishing,
who believed in my story enough to accept the book for publication.

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HEART OF A COWBOY

MISSY LYONS

Copyright © 2010





Chapter One


“You looking for some action tonight? I need a date, sugar.”

Derek hated approaching strangers for sex but this was how the sex
business worked. If he sucked some cock, he could eat again and his
stomach would finally stop growling. He forced a smile and focused
on the man illuminated by the streetlight in front of him.

By two in the morning most of the guys were off the streets of

Dallas on their way home from the bars or in bed by now. However,
the red-light district was full of hookers. Most men either came here
to work or to get some, and this one was obviously looking to get laid,
but he acted too awkward to be a regular john. He was dressed far too
nicely in a matching jacket and pant suit, with a clean set of leather
penny loafers. A gold wedding ring marked him as married. Just
another reminder this wasn’t a place to find a life mate. This guy
wasn’t looking for love, just to get his rocks off. For Derek, these
nights became a meaningless string of sexual events that never helped
him find himself as he hoped they would.

“What kind of action?” New guy was curious and obviously

aroused. His right hand was hidden in his front pocket. Most likely
playing pocket pool with his set of balls.

“The deep throat kind.” Derek gave him a hint of a smile, just

enough to be construed as encouragement.

“You’re not a cop, right?” The stranger shared his nervous nature

by shuffling his weight from side to side.

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Heart of a Cowboy

9

 

“No way, man.” Derek clenched his teeth together before reaching

forward to stroke the other man’s dick from the outside of his pants.
“If I was a cop would I do this?”

The stranger drew his breath in slowly. He didn’t pull away from

Derek’s touch, but his dark brown eyes looked over his shoulder as if
he were looking for something or someone. “I hear cops have to admit
if they are setting you up.”

“I’m not a cop,” Derek laughed softly, “just looking to make a

quick buck and get a little male-on-male action if you know what I
mean.” Derek felt up the other guy’s muscles over his arms and
leaned in suggestively. The stranger wasn’t all that handsome or all
that muscular. Derek would never have picked him out as potential
boyfriend material. He had a few extra pounds on his belly and wore
glasses that did nothing to show off his brown eyes and long lashes.
Nothing attracted him to this man, but Derek learned to shut the fuck
up and just suck harder at a young age.

“How much for a little loving?” asked the stranger.
Little loving? That was a funny way to phrase it. Loving was the

last thing Derek would call it, and sex wasn’t love to him anymore. It
was just sex, but the guy probably needed some kind of break. Like so
many other men, he was hiding behind a marriage, too afraid to tell
the world he preferred dick to pussy in his diet.

On a whim, he cut him a break. This close to Christmas he

charged forty dollars, but tonight he just wanted enough to eat.
“Twenty dollars for a blow job.”

“That all? What can I get for more?” The guy had hope in his

puppy dog look he threw Derek, but Derek just wasn’t interested.

“That’s all I do.” It was the one rule Derek had. He never kissed a

date, and he never offered anything more. It was meaningless sex and
he wanted to believe there was a guy out there who would value his
body. If he sold out now, it was like saying good-bye to those dreams
of finding a guy who cared. “If you want more, you’re going to have
to find another boy-toy to do it.”

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Derek turned to leave, but the man stopped him with a hand on his

wrist. “I’ll take it.”

“I get my money upfront and then you get your loving.”
“Can it wait till we get back? I left my money in the car.” The

dude looked at him hopefully.

“No way, man.” That was another rule he didn’t like to break.

Most guys who tried to pull that “I’ll pay later” shit didn’t want to pay
him at all, but this guy was dressed right. He was a middle-aged
businessman, not the usual street walkers, gang bangers, or wannabe
drag queens. He looked honest enough. It was taking a risk to trust
him, but it could pay off if he became a return customer.

“Please can we hurry and I’ll just pay you later? I don’t want to be

seen around here.”

Just a wee bit paranoid your wife might find you’re

propositioning a prostitute, huh?

“Okay.” Derek rolled his eyes. Why the fuck was he feeling like

such a sucker for saying yes? “But you are going to pay me what a
blow job is really worth, which is forty dollars for making me wait for
my money, and if you fuck me over, I’m going to be mad.” What the
fuck? Derek didn’t want to lose a paying customer, so he ignored the
twisting of his stomach. This guy hadn’t technically paid him. Yet. He
was cold and tired and wanted to go home. It sounded like this guy
wanted to have this over with as fast as he did.

The other guy’s jaw nearly hit the pavement, but he accepted the

offer. “Fine. Forty dollars.”

“Deal.” He agreed too easily for Derek to feel good about trusting

the guy, but he ignored that niggling feeling in the pit of his stomach
and carried on with the terms of his agreement, hoping to get paid.
“We can get some privacy in your car.”

“Let’s just do it here.” The guy started to unbuckle his pants.
The last thing Derek wanted was to get arrested again or ticketed

for indecent exposure. The court system didn’t give a fuck if he was
prostituting himself for drugs or food. It treated him equally harshly.

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Heart of a Cowboy

11

 

He tugged the guy’s arm back toward a dark corner of the street.
“Come on. There’s an alley back there we can use.”

The guy sounded agreeable and made a halfhearted laugh.

“Sounds good to me.”

They stopped behind a Dumpster, and Derek felt up the front of

his new friend. His hard-on pressed against the front of his pants in
the palm of Derek’s hand, and Derek felt an involuntary response to it
in his pants. It sucked being turned on by this at all, but there was a
part of him that liked this. A part of him wanted to believe this guy
wanted him, needed him on a primal level, but he just wanted him
now. There was no deeper meaning to it. There sure as hell wouldn’t
be a tomorrow.

He dropped to his knees in front of the guy. It’s funny that he

didn’t even bother with names nowadays. If this guy was a boyfriend,
he would know his name by now, but tonight he didn’t bother with
pretending. He unzipped the other man’s pants and freed his dick.
“Look at the size of your cock! I bet you make all the boys cry when
you fuck them.”

“I wouldn’t know. You’re the first guy I’ve been with since high

school. You sure you wouldn’t consider up the rear? My wife won’t
ever do that. She thinks it’s gross.” His laughter sounded
uncomfortable. Forced.

“That’s one thing we have in common. Not the gross part, but no

one gets rear access from me.” Derek helped to unbuckle his pants,
and the guy curled his fingers through Derek’s hair. Derek did his best
to ignore him, unzipping his package. He didn’t want to believe this
could mean anything to him. The cock was warm, hardening in his
hands. He licked the head of the dude’s cock before slipping it into
his mouth.

“Shit, that feels good.” The businessman moaned and Derek

pretended to enjoy it, hoping throaty sounds of pleasure would make
the guy come faster.

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He cupped the other man’s balls and squeezed ever so slightly. A

drop of pre-cum tasted salty on his tongue. He smelled super sexy and
clean. Funny Derek had to get close enough to suck his cock to notice.
It was a masculine scent with tropical fruit and spice undertones.
“Damn, you smell good. I could just eat you up.”

“You like that? It’s my cologne. Oh fuck. You know how to suck

a guy off.” His date rammed his cock in Derek’s face like he was
ramming a pussy. “My wife bought it. Some Ralph Lauren fragrance.
I think it’s called Polo Black. Shit, I can’t think straight when you do
that. Fuck me hard—that feels good!”

Derek didn’t respond because he couldn’t. Deep-throating the

guy’s dick took up all his attention and then some. He moaned for the
guy’s benefit, working his cock in and out of his mouth, and Derek
wrapped his hands around his hips to the other man’s ass. He
massaged the butt cheeks, squeezing each one.

Derek sucked until his new friend came in gushing spurts of cum,

swallowing as much as he could to keep any mess down. Some guys
tasted better than others, but this guy tasted bitter and metallic in his
mouth and he couldn’t wait to get out of there to wash his mouth out
with some water.

Derek stood, allowing the other man to take his time to get

himself put back together.

“I guess that’s it then?” His date made a disgusted sound and

straightened his pants after buckling his belt.

“Yeah, unless you want to open your wallet a little more.”
He actually had the gall to look insulted. “No way am I paying

another twenty dollars for a two-minute letdown you call a blow job.”

“Hey buddy, it’s not my problem that you came too fast. I held up

my end of the bargain, now it’s time to pay up.” Derek folded his
arms holding a defensive stance in front of the other guy’s exit.

“Fuck you.” The jerk pushed against his chest, knocking Derek to

the ground, and fled on foot.

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Heart of a Cowboy

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Goddamn it. Derek watched his meal ticket run away and

screamed after him to stop. Running after him seemed futile,
especially after the guy got in his car and sped off. He screamed at the
top of his lungs. “You owe me forty bucks, asshole!”

If Derek ever saw him again on the street, he’d be tempted to take

that money off his hide. Give him a knuckle sandwich. But beneath
the anger it hurt to get rejected like that. Insulting his blow job was
the ultimate letdown. He didn’t think it was worth paying for. Now
that was fucked up.

Damn it. He knew better than to trust some pecker off the street.

Now what the fuck was he going to do? It was getting to be too late to
pick up another john.

He had to push past the anger and rejection, to get back out to

work. Even the streets around here were empty. There was no way he
would be making money around here. If he stayed he would be going
to bed hungry.

Again.

* * * *

His stomach growled. After having that jerk-off not pay, Derek

headed for a more hopeful locale.

The dinner theatre downtown was just letting out the second

showing of the Christmas play Scrooge. A flood of people exiting the
double doors caught Derek’s attention. They all looked so damn
happy. None of them looked hungry; most of them were dressed
formally or in really expensive sequin-covered gowns.

Derek tried to look for a target, a lonely gentleman, or a guy who

didn’t look happy with his current girlfriend, wife, or whatever he
bothered calling his date, but he didn’t think anyone would be a taker
tonight. They all looked too damn happy, and if he wasn’t careful
about who he made suggestions to, he would get punched, or the cops
called on him. The women would be a no-go. He couldn’t pretend to

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fake interest for their benefit, and he didn’t feel like trying to go
hetero now.

Jesus, why the fuck did he feel like a beggar on the side of the

road begging for a few dollars? They would look down their nose at
him just the same whether he asked for the money straight up or
offered to work for the money. It wasn’t like these losers couldn’t
spare a few dollars.

They wouldn’t miss the cash, but he would certainly miss dinner.

His stomach growled loudly as if to emphasize the point, and a sharp
pain shot through his middle. He held his stomach and made up his
mind he would do whatever it took to get a decent meal and not have
to go rooting around in the garbage for it like some animal.

It was people like this who treated him like a pariah. This was the

part of society in which he would never belong. This was more like
the clique that the jerk from earlier tonight belonged in. People who
thought they could walk all over him and get away with it. Use him,
abuse him, and throw him down in the street.

Well, tonight he was going to get what he deserved.
If he couldn’t earn his money, he would just take it like a common

criminal.

Derek scanned the group for an easy target. An old person,

someone who appeared frail, or at least didn’t have a six-foot man
attached to her arm. His eyes stopped when he saw a short Asian
woman. She was pretty enough, but barely came to five feet tall. Most
of the crowd was walking to the parking lot, but she appeared to be
waiting for something or someone in front of the auditorium.

Derek inhaled the cold air sharply into his lungs and set a brisk

pace to cross the street, aiming to come up behind her. He would have
to act quickly. She wore a cocktail dress in white and black satin, with
a matching evening bag with silver handles. She didn’t seem to care
much about anything going on; her eyes seemed unfocused and lost in
private daydreams. She had her hands behind her, playing with the
beaded bag in her fingers.

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Heart of a Cowboy

15

 

The handbag wasn’t very big. It couldn’t have much in it. Perhaps

it held her makeup and a few dollars to get her by for the evening, but
a few dollars would be enough.

Derek bumped into her. She hit the ground and he grabbed the

purse, tucking it firmly under his arm like a football. The few people
around her were just as confused at what happened as she was. It gave
Derek precious seconds to increase the distance between him and her.
He ran like the devil was chasing him.

Suddenly she realized her purse was missing. The moment came

when he heard her call out behind him, “Stop! Thief!”

He took long strides, crossing the asphalt parking lot in record

time. His heart raced and his lungs took in painfully cold air in deep
gasps.

He was going to make it. He couldn’t hear anyone pursuing him.

He turned his head round to look. No one was running after him, and
after he cleared the parking lot, he could easily clear the block wall
and disappear into the darkness of the surrounding streets.

An engine roared to life behind him and time suddenly slowed

down. He felt a bumper hit him from behind. The force thrust him off
his feet, causing him to fly through the air. He hit the ground hard—
skidding to a stop.

An endorphin rush shielded him from the pain, but he’d be feeling

it in a few minutes. Road rash undoubtedly marked his face. He
touched his hand to it to find there was blood.

He looked back at the black truck that hit him. It was an

oversized, gas-guzzling, freaking dually pickup truck, for Christ’s
sake. He might as well have been run over by a tank. It would have
probably hurt less. Suddenly, the driver’s side door flew open and a
six-foot cowboy jumped out, hood sliding like Bo Duke. The guy was
on him before he could move, grabbing him up by the shirt and
slamming his head back down to the concrete. His vision swam and
his brain pounded against his skull.

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“Shit. Please stop!” He put his hands out to protect himself and

offered the purse simultaneously to the Indian straddling his hips.

The Indian man just handed it off to the cowboy standing next to

him.

“You better pray Angela’s not hurt, because if she is I’ll have to

take it out on that pretty face of yours.” The Indian yanked Derek to
his feet, twisting his arm behind his back. He pushed Derek back
toward the girl he stole the purse from and the crowd of onlookers.

Shit and double-shit.
It looked like his luck had just run out.

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Chapter Two


“Now aren’t you glad I came along as the designated driver?”

Ishwar asked his good friend and boss, Jesse.

“I could have taken the kid.”
“Sure you could have. Anybody can catch roadkill,” Ishwar joked.
“I didn’t kill him, even if I did want to.” Jesse shook his head.
Red and blue police lights flashed in the nearly deserted parking

lot. Most of the onlookers had gone home when they realized there
was nothing left to see. A few people stayed, and stared at the thief
through, but even they were beginning to get bored watching Ishwar,
Angela, and Jesse answer questions for a police report. The young
man’s profile remained strong and rigid.

“I don’t know what possessed that kid to do that.” Ishwar shook

his head in disapproval. He still felt pissed off that he let it happen at
all. He shouldn’t have left Angela’s side, but he thought he and his
good friend Jesse would run to get the truck while she was in the
restroom. That’s what he got for letting his impatient side rule him.

Now, his blood was still pumping from tackling the young man

earlier. It annoyed him to feel the instant attraction to the young thief,
but it wasn’t just the fact that the man was undeniably handsome. His
dark brows and blue eyes were startling against his fair skin and light
hair. He would stand out in a magazine as a model, but the way his
body felt beneath Ishwar’s on the pavement still echoed in his mind.

“Don’t worry about it,” the police officer answered. “He won’t

trouble you again. This looks like an open-and-shut case. As soon as
we’re done here, I’ll take Derek downtown and book him.”

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“Derek?” Angela blinked back surprise. “Do you know him,

Officer?”

“Sure do, the kid’s been on my beat for the last six years. He’s a

runaway from a group home and got into some trouble. The kid was
too young to work a real job, so he made his living by selling the only
thing he could. I picked him up occasionally for prostitution. I’ll say
one thing for him. He kept his nose clean, stayed away from gangs
and drugs. I had hopes he would clean up his act and make it, but it
looks bad.”

“He’s still a kid? How old is he?” Jesse’s lips pursed together to

form a thin line.

The cop shook his head and shut his leather binder. “This time’s

going to be different. This time’s he’s going to be tried as an adult.”

“Jesse, this doesn’t feel right.” Jesse’s girlfriend, Angela, tugged

on his shirt sleeve.

“Angela!” Jesse placed his hand over hers, but he grimaced

visibly. “Now’s not a time to go all soft on me.”

”Don’t worry.” Ishwar tapped his foot impatiently, looking at

Derek through the police car window. He’d known enough pretty
boys over his lifetime to know guys like him felt entitled to take what
they wanted. The young man needed consequences for his actions,
and going to jail was probably just the wake-up call he needed. “He’s
going to get what he deserves. The guy’s going to jail.”

“No, but don’t you see? Nobody ever gave him a chance to do the

right thing in life.” Angela looked like she was about to tear up on
him and cry at any moment.

“Derek had a choice, and he still does. Now those choices will just

involve a probation officer.” Jesse chuckled.

Angela’s brows furrowed, and she didn’t bother to laugh at Jesse’s

joke. She turned to address the police officer. “Did you ask him why
he stole my purse?”

He shrugged. “Derek said he hadn’t eaten in two days and he was

too hungry to think clearly, but why doesn’t matter much. The judge

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Heart of a Cowboy

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is going to take one look at his record and give him the maximum
sentence.”

Angela’s chin dropped. The horror of that statement chilled her to

her bones. “Jesse, he needs our help. Ishwar, can’t you do
something?”

“He assaulted you.” Jesse’s voice was loving but firm. He was not

going to bend on this issue, not even when she looked at him with
tears in her eyes. “He needs jail.”

“I know, but he won’t get the help he needs in jail.” She pleaded

with Jesse, giving him a doe-eyed look that would make even Rambo
cave in.

“Ah, here we go. It’s just like a woman to wanna rescue every

stray she sees,” Ishwar muttered under his breath.

“What did you say?” Angela must have heard him because her

face darkened.

“Nothin’.” Ishwar shook his head. He might as well give up now,

because Angela was as bullheaded as they came.

“Can I drop the charges, Officer?” she asked.
“Angela!” Jesse stomped his foot. “How could you even bring up

the idea?”

“No, ma’am. I have to book him, but if you want a copy of the

police report, it should be ready on Monday with the holidays and
all.”

Angela couldn’t take her eyes off the dejected man staring at the

floorboards of the police car. She stomped her foot. “He can’t spend
Christmas in jail!”

Jesse sighed in disgust. “Angela, don’t do this. You don’t know

that guy. Jail might be just what he needs.”

“At least he won’t go hungry in jail.” The officer handed her a

business card with some handwritten numbers on the back of it and
his name on the front. “If you need anything else, feel free to give me
a call.”

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* * * *


“You made bail.” The door unlocked with a metallic ring,

snapping Derek out of his daydreams. This had to be some kind of
trick. He’d heard enough stories to make him cynical.

Sure, lead the gay guy out of the holding cell to a private place

where he can have the shit beat out of him. No witnesses meant no
one gets sued later. He’d rather stay here, thank you very much.

He didn’t bother getting up from the cot. The gray stone walls

closed in around him. “I don’t have any friends who could afford to
bail me out.”

The guard stood in the open doorway to the only exit of the small

room. “Well, there’s a cowboy out front who claims to know you. Get
your stuff and let’s go.”

A cowboy? Now that detail was going to be bugging him until he

found out who the guard was talking about. He didn’t know any
cowboys. “You took all my stuff, remember?”

“I don’t have time to stand here all day. Roll up your mattress and

get your shoes on.”

Derek did as he was told and followed the guard out of his cell

with his mattress in his hands and the few possessions he was issued
when he checked into his cell. “I’m not trying to be a pain or
anything, but I still don’t see how this is even possible.”

* * * *


The clerk behind the desk stamped and dated a few pieces of

paper before handing them to Derek. “Theft from a person is a pretty
serious charge. It’s a felony and you’ll have to come back on March
third for your court date.”

Damn, the young man seemed to be as clueless as they came,

fumbling through the paperwork. If he had such a long rap sheet as
the cop claimed, wouldn’t he know the drill by now? Of course, he

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was probably a little critical since he didn’t want to be there in the
first place. Angela had him by the balls, and he was only giving the
young man half a chance because of her.

“Okay,” Derek answered. His back was to Jesse, so he didn’t see

him at first or recognize the same cowboy who had tackled him with
Ishwar.

“I’ll need you to sign here and here.” The cop pointed and Derek

whipped his pen into a nearly unrecognizable scribble. “Make sure
you remember to mark your court date on your calendar. If you don’t
show up the judge will issue a bench warrant.”

Jesse knew the moment Derek recognized him from his adventure

a few hours ago. His face had a shell-shocked expression, like his
stomach had dropped to his feet. His expression was sheer terror and
spoke volumes. Jesse could only imagine what was going through his
head right now. This is the cowboy who bailed me out? Jesse smiled,
enjoying that little bit of power he felt over the young man. Sure, he
wanted to kick the guy’s ass, but this gave him almost as much
satisfaction.

“What are you doing here?” Derek had long, dishwater blond hair,

and striking dark blue eyes framed with long lashes. He could easily
have been a model, and had very beautiful fair skin any woman would
be envious of. He could be working as a model, but instead he was
working the streets. Angela was right. The boy needed help turning
his life around, but he had to want it first. If he didn’t want to change,
then no one could help him.

“Paying your bail for theft from a person.” Jesse looked him up

and down. He could take him in a fight if he had to. He was about five
foot ten and a few inches shorter than Jesse. His frame was still wiry,
resembling more a boy than a man, and Jesse had at least fifty pounds
on the man.

Derek made a squished-up face, but he still had a pretty-boy look.

“I don’t want your money, mister.”

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“Why not?” He had been ready to steal his money, but he

wouldn’t take it when it was willing to give it to him? Talk about a
mixed sense of values. The man needed more help than Jesse first
realized, and his pride could get in the way of him getting it.

“Because I don’t want to owe nobody nothin’ and every time

someone helps me, there are strings attached.”

“You’re right. I expect something for my money.”
Derek’s sour facial expression shared his cynicism. “You don’t

own me.”

“And I don’t want to. I paid fifteen hundred dollars for your bail

and I expect you to work it off at my ranch. I could use the help this
time of year.”

“You’re giv-giving me a job?” With the stutter, Jesse suspected he

might be slipping back into an old childhood habit, which Jesse chose
to ignore.

“Yeah, if you want it. Otherwise, I could keep my money and let

you stay here over Christmas.”

Jesse gave him a moment to consider the offer.
“I still expect you to do the right thing and show up for court.”

Jesse watched his expression carefully for a softening of the hard
grimace. “I am just giving you an honest day’s pay and a place to
stay. It’s not much, eight hundred dollars a month plus food and
lodging. You get one night off a week, and the men usually rotate the
night off. So the animals still get fed.”

“What kind of work?”
“We have to feed the animals a little extra since the grass is

dormant this time of year, and check and mend the fences. Some of
the young colts need to be worked. There’s always work to do, and
right now we are short one guy. What do ya say?” Jesse smiled a
little, wondering if the young man had the good sense to know a good
thing when he saw it,

“I don’t know nothin’ about horses.” Derek frowned, and a dimple

marked his cheek. He was a pretty boy and Jesse doubted he would be

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able to stick it out, but he was doing this for Angela more than Derek.
Hopefully a good day’s work would knock some sense into him.
Maybe Luke, his foreman, could do some good with the young man.

Jesse shrugged. “You don’t have to. I’ll teach you everything

there is to know.”

“Your lady won’t be mad at me? I did steal her purse.”
“It was Angela’s idea that you come to stay with us, but it won’t

all be fun and games. I expect you to live by my rules when you’re
under my roof. No drinking, no drugs, and no women.”

That was the closest thing to a smile that Jesse saw cross his lips.

It disappeared just as quickly. Derek wet his lips and thrust out his
hand for Jesse. Derek’s hands were soft and in sharp contrast to his
own work-roughed hands. “Okay, you got a deal.”

Jesse grasped Derek’s hands in a firm handshake. He winked at

the man, trying to lighten the spirit. Many men gave up after a few
days of working sunup to sundown and the kid had a good chance of
backing out of their deal, but he’d give him every chance to work it
off.

He threw his arm over Derek’s shoulders and patted him on the

back. “Great. I’ll consider you a man of your word and hold you to it.
Life on the ranch is hard work, but, uh, you get used to it.”

* * * *


Luke, the foreman took care of everything Jesse couldn’t on the

ranch. He showed Derek to his bed and where he could put the stuff
he didn’t have. He asked if he had any work clothes and Derek was
embarrassed to explain he didn’t have any. Luke shrugged it off,
telling him not to worry and he’d get him some hand-me-down blue
jeans.

Luke was kind of rough on the outside, but his attitude toward

Derek was fair and he didn’t treat him differently just because he was
working off a bill. His worn jeans didn’t make a statement other than

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Luke was used to working hard, and he wore a maroon button-down
shirt with the long sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The gray streaks in
Luke’s hair gave a clue to his age, but his blue eyes were welcoming
and friendly. Derek had no clue whether Jesse had told Luke he was
bailed out of jail, but he liked him because of that attitude. He wasn’t
treated like some pariah of society. He was just another guy to Luke.
He wasn’t some piece of ass. Luke really was being nice for the sake
of being nice. There was no ulterior motive.

Which was great, for once.
Derek looked around the small room. It was small by anyone’s

standards, barely large enough to hold the bunk beds and a chest of
drawers, but it was his. He was lucky enough he wouldn’t be sharing
it with anyone else. It felt good to claim the space as his.

“Can’t believe Jesse didn’t bring your clothes.” Luke shook his

head, clicking his tongue disapprovingly. “I know that boy has better
manners than that. I helped raise him right. He should have dropped
by your house to pick up your clothes before he came over here. I’ll
take you home this evening if you want.”

“Nah, it’s okay. I told him not to bother.” Derek wasn’t going to

admit he was too embarrassed to allow Jesse to see where he lived or
how bad his neighborhood was. He would just get his stuff later, if he
bothered to go home at all. Better to be thought of as homeless than to
go back now. “I don’t have a home to go home to.”

“All right, I’m going to let that lie for now, but it’s okay to accept

help when you need it. Around here, we like to think of each other as
family.”

“Not me. I am more like the distant relative just passing through.”
“You might be surprised. You may find you like it here enough to

call it home.”

“Maybe.” Derek didn’t want to argue with the old man, but he

knew better than to try to think he belonged.

“Well, come along. I’ll give you the grand tour.” Luke motioned

for him to follow, walking out of the small room down the long

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hallway, past many doors. Derek peered inside to find rooms similar
to his, each with a bunk bed and a dresser. The only difference being
they were lived in, and covered with pictures and personal items, not
bare walls.

There was an office midway through, with a blond cowboy sitting

behind the desk. He looked like he could be a twin to Jesse, with his
large muscle-covered frame and those brooding blue eyes.

“Hey, Beau! Got a new boy to add to the payroll.” Luke spread his

arm wide.

Derek couldn’t get over how similar the two looked. “You related

to Jesse?”

“Hell no! Least not till he marries my sister, Angela.” He gave a

playful wink to Derek and reached out to shake his hand. “Now who
do I have the pleasure of meeting?”

Funny, but Angela and this man didn’t look alike at all. Angela

was clearly of some Asian descent and this guy couldn’t be any
whiter. “Derek’s my name, sir.”

“Yeah, I heard about you. Call me Beau. I handle the books

around here, and Jesse talked to me about the situation. Once you
work off your debt, I hope you will consider staying. We could use
another strong man around here. Jesse keeps talking about expanding
his territory and increasing the head of cattle, but he needs more hired
hands first.”

“I’ll think about it.” It was one thing to pay back what he owed,

but he couldn’t imagine living here for good. He doubted he’d be
welcomed that long. He had moved from home to home as a kid
because his foster parents would never accept him as he was. They
called him damaged goods. When they tried to change him into
something he wasn’t, he acted out in more ways than one, taking self-
destructive paths that ultimately led him to the group home
downtown, and that dead end led to running away to hit the streets.

Luke shot the breeze for a few minutes with Beau before saying

his good-byes and continuing the tour. The bunkhouse was three

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times larger than the house, and fifteen men lived there at any one
time. Some of the cowboys stayed and others were drifters, coming
and going with the wind.

At the end of the building, he was shown a large recreation room.

An old worn leather couch faced a flat-screen television, and a pool
table was on the other side. There was a kitchenette and a small table
in the corner.

“Millie makes enough for everyone at the big house, but if you

ever get hungry or don’t feel much like socializing, you can always
get yourself some food here too.” Luke followed Derek’s train of
sight, guessing what he was thinking. “We keep the fridge stocked
with plenty of munchies.”

Derek would come back later. He still felt like he was starving

even though he had eaten that morning in the jail. A constant raw
ache ate at his stomach, but he knew food would soothe the pain.
“Thanks, man.”

“Who’s the newbie?” A man sitting in the corner with his feet

propped up on the table next to the fireplace suddenly put his
newspaper down. His dark eyes looked Derek up and down with
interest.

The man had dark brown skin like a Mexican, and thick black hair

that was pulled back in a braid at the nape at his neck.

“Ishwar, this is Derek. He’s new around here. I expect you to treat

him right and not run him off like the others.”

“Now I remember you. I helped tackle you the other night with

Jesse.”

Derek pasted on a smile of nonchalance, but he felt an

embarrassing heat sweep his cheeks. Briefly he wondered what would
have happened if he were just a little bit faster. None of this would
have happened and he wouldn’t be spending Christmas at a cattle
ranch. “Never was very good at football.”

“Yeah,” Ishwar thankfully chose to ignore his comment, “and that

wasn’t me that ran off the help. That was because you hired a bunch

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of pansies.” Ishwar laughed, sweeping a wayward strand of long dark
brown hair back behind his ears. He looked like an American-Indian
wearing cowboy gear, with dark sun-kissed skin and a long face with
an angular jaw that looked like it was chiseled from stone. He had a
striking face, deep brows and high cheekbones. He was clean-shaven,
but Derek guessed he had a thick mat of chest hair under his shirt. His
hair was the longest Derek had ever seen on a guy, even braided He
imagined if it was loose Ishwar’s hair would fall down past his
shoulders to be waist length. It was very sexy. His thoughts strayed to
what it would feel like to have that straight, long hair sweep across his
stomach and wrap around his cock.

Pansies? Derek felt like he had been doused with ice water. He

was familiar with similar attitudes, and as sexy as Ishwar looked, he
would have a meltdown if he knew Derek was gay. It was something
that would be best to be prevented. It was easier to make friends when
you didn’t take your business public. If they weren’t told different
most guys assumed he was straight. They lacked what he liked to call
gaydar, that internal sense he nicknamed gay radar was how he could
tell if a man across the room was gay or bi. Which could work in his
favor, if he managed to keep his mouth shut.

“Ishwar acts tough, but he’s really just a softie. You ever need

anything and I’m not around, then just ask. He’ll take care of you.”

Derek nodded, a lump in his throat. Sure, he could trust the guy—

until he found out he was gay and then all hell would break loose. Just
like everyone else. Ishwar would turn him away and shun him if he
found out about his dark little secret.

After a period of abusive relationships that never lasted, Derek

had turned to a string of sexual acts that turned his soul searching into
sexual gratification. Never finding the love or acceptance he really
wanted. You can’t find yourself by looking down someone else’s
pants, but it took him years to figure that out. It was meaningless, an
empty orgasm that left him wanting more and never quite filled that
hole inside of him.

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“Come on, Derek. I’ll show you the barn. Your chores are easy

but time consuming and need to be done every day.”

Derek turned to follow, catching one last glimpse of the Indian.
“See you around, kid.” Ishwar waved.
It didn’t sit well, being called a kid, but Derek didn’t bother

correcting him. He was tired of fighting the rest of the world He just
wanted some peace. “Yeah, see ya.”

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Chapter Three


It was early in the morning, and Derek stood beneath the hot

water, allowing the spray to do its magic, soothing all the aching
muscles and helping him wake up. He watched from half-closed eyes
the Indian next to him slowly lathering his cock and ass. His dick
slipped between his fingers, slathered in a sudsy layer of soap.

He wondered what it would feel like to be kneeling in front of him

while the man fucked his mouth. How would it feel to have his lips
wrapped around the other guy’s cock? He would give just about
anything to find out.

The bunkhouse was built to be practical and had little extra space.

In order to house up to thirty men at a time and function, privacy was
not at the top of the list. The bunkhouse had one large community
bathroom, and privacy wasn’t exactly an option while showering.

What shocked Derek was his reaction. He remembered having

similar feelings in high school, covertly sneaking peeks of the other
guys soaping up their firm bodies and their cocks.

He should be over this by now. He had seen more than enough

naked men in his short life to last a lifetime, but the Indian, Ishwar,
set them all to shame.

It must be a guy thing.
Didn’t every guy compare his package to the guy next to him?

Sure, but none of them would admit to fantasizing about the twenty-
something man and playing with his cock. Throw in one Indian for a
wet and wild ride. Sex would have been more fun than an eight-
second ride on a bull, but none of these guys would consider sex with
a man. He knew better than to ask, but what if they suspected he was

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gay? Would it mean he was treated differently, or that they would be
all awkward every time they talked to him? It just wasn’t worth
worrying about.

Oh, shit. Ishwar caught him staring. Derek quickly looked away

and tried to ignore his racing heart.

“Hey good morning, Derek.” Ishwar punched his shoulder

playfully. “Don’t go back to sleep. I’d hate to have to explain to Jesse
how you drowned in the shower.”

“If I drown, it’s only because you people made me get up at such

an ungodly hour. The sun’s not even up yet.” Derek made an effort to
look up at Ishwar’s face and not his most favorite feature. Ishwar’s
face sported a smile that could seduce a nun, and his dick was even
better with the evidence of a slight arousal. He wished he could reach
out and touch it, but he wasn’t about to break the unwritten code of
the community bathroom.

No looking, no touching, and definitely no licking.
Damn it.
It would certainly spice up his sex life if all the above were

included in every shower.

He wet his lips with his slick tongue, imagining an orgy of

cowboys. Wild. Wet. Firm, tight bodies sliding against each other.
The Indian was forefront in his daydream.

He felt all the blood in his brain rush to his dick, and his balls

tightened. Shit, he couldn’t get caught with a hard-on in the shower.
That’d be the quickest way to an ass kicking he could find. He knew
better after years of putting up with locker rooms filled with stupid
teenage high school boys. He’d been in fights almost every week his
freshman year until he dropped out.

This could begin all that shit all over again.
Derek turned off the water and followed Ishwar to a stack of clean

towels on the shelves in the corner. He did his best to shield his
erection and think of something less sexy. He tried filling his head
with ugly, old wrinkled men, but it was hard. He tried to imagine

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Ishwar that way, but no matter how he tried to picture the sun-bronzed
giant older, he couldn’t turn himself off. Something inside of him
liked the idea of growing closer together and watching Ishwar’s hair
turn gray, and no matter how many wrinkles he imagined, they didn’t
take away from that magical spark he saw in his eyes. It didn’t take
away from the magnetic pull he felt from the man or the desire to be
turned around and fucked by him.

Oh, this was getting awkward. He reached for the towel and

wrapped it around his waist. Ishwar rubbed his body vigorously and
did the same thing, using the white fuzzy towel to hide his sexy man-
parts.

The towel made it ten times easier for Derek to look him in the

eyes. Thank you very much.

“Millie makes breakfast for the men in the morning. If you want

to come out to the big house, there should be some steak and eggs for
you.”

“Thanks for the offer, but I usually skip breakfast.” Today he had

a better reason than most mornings not to eat. Usually, he slept in but
today he needed some sexual relief, and the only way that was going
to happen was if he managed to find some privacy. They walked back
to their private rooms side by side.

Ishwar didn’t mention if he noticed Derek walking bowlegged the

rest of the way, and Derek was glad. It was hard enough to keep a
straight face with a rock-hard dick. Blue balls were not just some
saying that women laughed about and men feared. They were
downright painful.

* * * *


Derek rolled up his pink silk sleeves and set to work, mucking out

the horse stalls into a wheelbarrow. It wasn’t fun but it was honest
work. He wasn’t used to working so hard and he’d be hurting by the
end of the day.

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The shirt would be a mess by the end of the day alongside his

body. It wasn’t meant to hold up under this kind of abuse, but Luke
was only able to offer him flannel shirts to borrow. The barn was
already sweltering and he’d be dripping sweat in ten minutes if he
accepted. So, Derek had politely refused and wore the same silk shirt
he wore from the first day. The last thing he wanted was to smell of
animals and sweat all day. It was bad enough he had to shovel waste
half the day.

He picked through the straw on the floor, shoveling the large

clumps of horse manure into the wheelbarrow. He removed all the
wet, soiled straw and then replaced it with fresh straw. Somehow, this
wasn’t the job he imagined he’d be doing when he accepted it.

“What are you, some sort of fruitcake?”
What the fuck? Derek looked up to find the source of his irritation.

A cocksure cowboy leaned against the stall gate. They say bald is
beautiful, but not on him. He had a few extra pounds on him, with a
little more padding in the middle, making him resemble an egg more
than a man. His glasses sat on the bridge of his nose.

“What are you talking about?” Derek paused, leaning against his

pitchfork. The horse, a palomino, looked over her shoulder at the
intruder.

“I asked you if you are gay or something. What’s wrong with

you? No real man wears a pink shirt.” The cowboy’s mouth twisted in
cruel pleasure.

“For your information, I am a real man. Just because you’re not

straight enough to wear pink doesn’t mean I care.” Derek wiggled his
neck and waggled one hand in what had to be the most gay move he
ever made. He didn’t know why the man’s comment rubbed him so
raw, but all he wanted to do was turn the cowboy off and hit back
with some of his own anger. If he wanted to pick a fight, then let him
find something worth fighting over.

Stunned, the man’s mouth opened and closed like a fish.

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“Is Bo showing you the ropes, greenhorn?” Ishwar came up

behind him, patting his bully on the shoulder. He was oblivious to the
underlying tension between the two men. A corded rope was slung
over one shoulder.

“You could say that.” The bullshit in the room had doubled since

Bo came around, and since his job today was cleaning up the shit…

“We don’t take kindly to your kind ’round here,” Bo muttered.
“Fuck off.” Derek uttered the words almost hoping for a fight. A

good scrapping would be welcomed.

“Hey—hey—hey! There’s no reason to start anything. We’re all

friends here.” Ishwar did his best to make peace, but it was already
too late.

Bo clenched his fists before screaming a war cry. He ran to Derek

and pushed him down to the ground. The punches came fast and
furious, to the head, to his stomach, and to his neck. Derek gave as
good as he got, but the cowboy had the upper hand.

Ishwar got between them, pulling Bo off Derek’s body. Derek sat

up, wiping blood from his nose with his sleeve. Adrenaline pumped
through his veins, his heartbeat raced, but he had blinders on to
everything else in the room. More than anything he wanted to beat the
shit out of that man and he didn’t care if he got hurt in the process.
What gave him the right to be so condescending toward gay men? It
was people like him who ruined any chance for happiness or joy in
Derek’s life.

He had been force-fed that holier-than-thou shit most his life, but

damn it, he had a right to dress and act how he wanted.

“Jesus, Derek. You okay?” Ishwar looked honestly concerned.
Derek nodded. Anger and bile climbed his raw throat. His arm

was scraped and when he wiped his nose, blood dripped in a fine
rivulet down his forearm.

“Shit, that looks bad. You’re bleeding all over the place. You

better get that arm looked at. You need to go up to the big house and

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see Mrs. Millie or Angela while I have a chat with Bo. They’ll take
care of you.”

Derek grabbed a rag that had been thrown on a wooden bench to

stop the nosebleed. He stiffly passed both men, too pissed off to
speak, his hands cupping his nose and doing little to stop the bleeding.

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Chapter Four


Angela was familiar with hard-headed men. Jesse was one of the

worst, but she didn’t know what to make of Derek. She handed him
more tissue to replace the bloody rag he’d brought in from the barn.
“Tilt your head back and make sure you put pressure on it. That
should help stop the bleeding.”

“Thanks,” he said, his blue eyes looking up at the hammered

copper ceiling tiles in the kitchen.

“No problem. I am beginning to wonder if trouble finds you or if

you are trouble.”

Derek’s breath released in a huff. He shook his head side to side.

“You and me both. I’ve been in more fights growing up. Sometimes it
feels like it’s me against the world.”

“What started it this time?”
“Bo has a chip on his shoulder.”
“And you thought you’d knock it off?”
“It’s not my fault.” Derek shrugged.
“You can’t control him, but you can take responsibility for your

actions.”

“I’m not the asshole here. He was going off about gays and—”

Derek looked away refusing to meet her eyes, but the pain emanating
from him was powerful.

“And you took it as a direct insult.” It was more of a statement

than a question.

“That’s because he was talking about me.” He removed the

crumpled and bloodied tissues from his nose and wiped his upper lip.
“Thanks. I think the bleeding’s stopped now.”

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He looked battered and bruised, but not just physically. His

shoulders were slumped, suggesting he was mentally worn out.
Angela’s heart ached for him. She wished she could help him and heal
his wounded spirit, but some things she couldn’t do. He’d have to
want to help himself first. His left eye was reddened and swelling.
Angela reached out, touching his otherwise unblemished cheek, and
he recoiled from her touch, wincing. “I think you’re going to end up
with a black eye. Hmm, let me get you some ice for that.”

She padded across the kitchen floor in her socks and got a plastic

bag to fill with crushed ice. She got a clean dish towel to wrap it in
and to take away some of the extreme cold.

“Look, I appreciate all you’ve done for me and I’m sorry for

trying to steal your purse, but I didn’t sign on to be some charity
project. I can’t change who I am.”

She filled the Ziploc baggy with ice from the icemaker on the side

of the stainless steel fridge. The loud rumbling filled the air as the ice
fell. “I am not asking you to change who you are, but accept it. When
you look in the mirror, what do you see?”

He huffed. “A prostitute, a criminal, nothing I want to be.”
“You can change all of that. That’s in the past and isn’t what

makes you special. Do you want to know what I see when I look at
you?”

She took his silence as approval to continue.
“You might be a man on the outside, but I’ll always see a scared

little boy in your eyes. You deserved a normal childhood, and a
family, but you always had to be tough to survive. You deserve to be
happy in life. If being gay makes you happy, then I really hope you’ll
find a partner who loves you. I think when you were prostituting
yourself, you were looking for that love but never found it.” She
handed the bag of ice to him, which he placed just under his eye.
“You don’t have to give yourself to anyone who doesn’t appreciate
you and value what you have to offer.”

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A lump rose in his throat before he swallowed. His dark eyelashes

lowered, shadowing the emotion hidden in his eyes. His tone was
resentful. “Not everyone is born with a silver spoon in their mouth.”

“I can’t change the past, but we can still change the future.”
“Maybe coming here was a bad idea. Maybe I should just go.”
“Don’t say that. We need you here.”
“Why? You got more than enough help to muck the stalls and

feed the horses.”

“If it’s because of Bo, I’ll talk to him and straighten him out, but

Christmas will be here in two more days.”

“So?”
“So, we could really use your help. We always have a dinner for

the Boys and Girls Club every year where Santa and his helpers hand
out toys to needy families. Well, what do you say?”

He sighed deeply. “Okay, but I won’t be dressing up in some silly

Santa outfit.”

“Don’t be silly, Jesse will be Santa. You’ll look great as an elf.”
He frowned, but there was a grin tugging at the corners of his

mouth.

“I’m happy fate led us to you even if we did meet under some

pretty weird circumstances. Can I count on you to stick around until
Christmas?” she asked, and she was almost surprised when he leaned
in and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, holding on like he
actually enjoyed the embrace.

“Yeah, I guess I’ll stick around, but I’m not wearing any pointed

green shoes.”

* * * *


“Derek?” Ishwar cupped Derek’s face in his hand, and it was all

Derek could do to not melt into him.

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“What?” An immediate and urgent heat swept through his body.

The gorgeous Indian probably had no idea what he did to him on a
cellular level.

“Did Bo do this to you?” Ishwar’s teeth were clenched. “Why

would he hurt you like that?”

Oh, he was just staring at the bruises. “I guess he didn’t think I

was pretty in pink.”

Ishwar’s brow raised high. Disbelief lined his face. “That fight

was over a shirt?”

“You could say that.”
“So it was all Bo’s fault?” He frowned intently at Derek’s injuries.

“This reminds me of a story my grandfather used to share with me.
An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life. He said,
‘A fight is going on inside of me. It’s a terrible fight between two
wolves. One is evil, and he is everything that makes me feel that way.
He is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity,
inferiority, false pride, and so much more. The other wolf is good. He
is joy, peace, love, faith, and all things that make me a better man.
The same fight is going on inside of you and every other person too.’
The boy thought about this for a minute and then asked his
grandfather, ‘Which wolf is winning?’ The old chief replied, ‘The one
you feed.’”

“I don’t get it.”
Ishwar exhaled deeply, looking like his patience was being tested

by Derek. “You have a choice in life. You can feed the wolf inside of
you that does good, or the one that will do evil.”

“I never had a choice. Even when I try to be good, people expect

the worst of me.”

“Derek, I want to help you, but unless you are honest with me, I

can’t do that.”

God, he wants me to be honest with him when I can barely be

honest with myself. He struggled to find the right words, and nothing

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seemed adequate. Nothing felt right. “Tell you? I’d much rather show
you.”

Derek leaned in until his lips brushed against Ishwar’s. It wasn’t

the best kiss he ever gave to another man, but it was something he had
wanted to do the moment he saw the Indian, and if he got kicked off
the ranch he would never get this chance again.

It was sweet, sensual, and even without the gentle probing tongue,

the kiss held a secret yearning for more under the surface. Ishwar
stiffened immediately. His lips didn’t respond to the gentle pressure
of Derek’s.

“I’m sorry.” Derek backed up, rejection recoiling in his stomach

like a rattlesnake. He was a fool to have tried to push the boundaries
of their friendship. “It just sort of happened. It won’t happen again.”

Now everything was going to be fucking awkward and weird

between them.

“I didn’t say I didn’t like it. I just didn’t expect it—hell—do that

again.” Ishwar pulled him back into his embrace. His arms crushed
Derek’s body against his. It was pure bliss, skin against skin in some
places. The only thing separating them was a thin layer of clothing.

Derek wanted to make this special, give Ishwar a part of himself,

and he wanted to take as much as he gave. Derek was hungry for
more, eager to taste a passion. He tested the other man’s lips with his
tongue, and Ishwar opened his moist cavity willingly. Ishwar’s soft,
supple lips toyed with him. Just as Derek was totally into him, he
pulled away, dragging the edge of his lip between his teeth. Derek
never wanted it to end. The kiss had a drugging effect on him, slow
and lingering; his body felt almost lethargic.

Ishwar tilted his head to one side, pushing his tongue deeper into

Derek’s moist mouth, then retreating. Derek touched Ishwar’s chest,
massaging the nipple through the shirt. He grinded against Ishwar’s
pelvis, feeling the other man’s dick hardening in his pants. It
alleviated some of his guilt. This attraction wasn’t one-sided, and he
was more than ready for some hardcore sex. It had been so long since

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he felt this kind of need with another man. He undulated his pelvis,
dry humping the man, rubbing against his penis and his hips at a
feverish pitch. Derek hadn’t done this kind of thing since junior high
school, when he was too young for real sex. He was so damn horny
tonight.

It felt too damn good to stop. His balls tightened. His cock

lengthened and hardened, still curved downward in his shorts.

“Derek. It’s too soon. I shouldn’t take advantage of you like this.”
“Don’t you like me?”
“I do, and I feel this attraction between us. I want it to grow, but I

want you to understand that I value what you are giving me. I want to
know you before I know your body. We can be friends without the
physical side of it first.”

“But the physical side is so much better than just being friends,”

Derek grumbled.

“You need to value yourself and what you are giving me.” Ishwar

pressed a kiss to Derek’s forehead and turned to leave. “When the
time is right, it will be worth the wait.”

“Ishwar.”
“Yes?” He paused at the door.
Not a single man he ever slept with would have been half the

gentleman that Ishwar was being now. Damn, he wished the man was
just a little less ethical, and yet something inside of him respected him
for that. “Thanks for being my friend.”

“No problem. I like being your friend.” Ishwar smiled before

exiting the room, and closed the door softly behind him.

Something welled up in Derek’s throat, and because he couldn’t

say it to his face, Derek said the words to the door. It was the first
time he had admitted more than lust for another man. “I like you too.”

* * * *

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“You ready to ride?” Ishwar leaned over the horse stall to ask him

the question.

“I thought I was slave labor, not here for pleasure but for real

work. I just finished feeding the horses and was going to take a quick
break.” Derek was dog tired. He was ready to finally take a break
after mucking out ten stalls. He leaned on his rake to look at Ishwar.

“Well, get your riding gear together. I have to check out the north

forty and can use some company.” Ishwar tipped his hat and smiled.

“Okay.” Derek couldn’t repress the grin. He was elated to be

changing his schedule and finally riding a horse instead of shoveling
after the back end. Riding on the back of a horse, he anticipated,
would be immensely more pleasurable than shoveling manure. Piling
feed into wheelbarrow after wheelbarrow to feed the horses was a
better workout than any gym he’d ever been to. A fine layer of sweat
adhered to his skin, and he was looking forward to getting outside
where the cool morning breeze would feel good against his skin.
“Which horse should I be using?”

“Any of the horses on the north side of the barn are free for

anyone who needs a good horse. I like the gelding Geronimo.”

“Which one is that?”
“You’ve seen him before. He’s black with a white star on his

forehead, and he’s already saddled and ready to go in the back of the
barn. I was just going to give him a good brush down before we go.
You know where the tack is, right?”

“I thought the tack was the horse cleaning stuff. Are you talking

about the saddles and stuff?”

“Excuse me. I took it for granted that you know as much as I do,

but let me start from the beginning. Have you saddled a horse
before?” Ishwar’s brows furrowed over his dark brooding eyes. “Or
maybe a better question would be have you ridden a horse before,
greenhorn?”

“No. Is that a problem?”

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Ishwar exhaled, blowing the breath out in a hiss between his teeth.

“No, but I don’t have time to babysit. Looks like you’ll be riding with
me today.”

* * * *


The gentle swaying of the horse was easy to get used to. It was not

turning the man in front of him so close around to kiss him or more
that was difficult. Ishwar’s deep masculine scent surrounded him. His
cologne smelled of sandalwood, and there seemed to be another scent
reminding Derek of nature and what it felt to be deep in a forest
surrounded by nature’s glory. He had his arms wrapped around
Ishwar’s waist, but the man didn’t seem tense in the least. His
muscles were relaxed, and his strong, lean fingers held the reins
gently.

“I thought there was more to this.”
Ishwar laughed, the deep rumble sending shivers through Derek’s

spine. “That’s where a greenhorn will get himself in trouble. You can
overdo it at first. The horses are really sensitive to their riders. All you
need to do is give a gentle nudge here and there, or squeeze a little
with your thighs.”

Derek’s began to daydream at the mere mention of squeezing

thighs. Ishwar was built like a professional athlete, with thighs of
steel. Would he be soft and gentle when his legs were wrapped around
him, or demanding and powerfully dominating in bed? Derek would
be happy with either scenario. He liked it hot and heavy just as much
as sweet and sensual, but if Ishwar continued to hold out on him, he
was going to be acting like a starving man at his last meal. Abruptly,
he realized Ishwar had been giving him instructions on how to guide
the horse with his knees, and he had missed nearly all of it. Not
wanting to sound like a complete goof, he said, “I hope there isn’t a
pop quiz later.”

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“Well, you need to try to pay attention, greenhorn. All the other

cowboys will be laughing at you if you have to ride on the back of
someone else’s horse all the time.”

“I don’t mind if it’s on the back of yours,” Derek joked, running

his fingers along Ishwar’s waist under his thick leather jacket. Testing
the water, he cupped the edge of Ishwar’s firm, round butt cheek in
each hand.

“Are you going to give me some incentive to keep you there? Or

just tease me?” Ishwar’s voice was an octave lower than normal.

“Tease you—please you. I’d give you all the incentive you

want—or need,” Derek promised.

“I don’t take my pleasure lightly. Before you go any further, you

need to understand this isn’t just some fling or a sexual escapade.
When you give yourself to me, you’ll belong to me.”

That comment seemed so final. Derek and Ishwar saw sex as

something completely different. Sex was just that—sex. It was meant
for pleasure, and if Derek could have sex instead of exercising, he
would. Why deny himself when it was simply physical? He moved
his hands to cover Ishwar’s bulging erection and whispered in his ear.
“What if it’s all about you?”

“Derek.” His voice held an edge of warning.
“I can give you pleasure without taking anything for myself.”

Through the thick denim, Derek cupped Ishwar’s hot dick, begging
for release.

“Derek.” This time Ishwar’s voice was more subdued; it was more

like a whisper than a command to stop.

“I won’t even charge you. This one’s on the house.” His expert

fingers worked at unzipping the Indian’s pants.

“What?”
For a moment, Derek panicked. Ishwar didn’t know about his

scarlet past, and it wasn’t something he felt like bringing up at a time
like this. Somewhere deep inside of him a voice screamed out that
Ishwar wouldn’t want him anymore when he did find out he sold his

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body for money. He was a whore and if Ishwar ever found out about
that dirty fact, he’d treat him like every other john in his life. Use him,
abuse him, and then just walk away. “Just relax and enjoy this,
Ishwar. It’s my gift to you.”

Derek pulled the top of Ishwar’s underwear down, unleashing a

monster of a cock. His dexterity and experience worked to his
advantage. The man was clay in his hands. Ishwar’s cock grew
warmer, hotter, and harder as Derek’s fingers wrapped around it and
fondled it. Ishwar moaned under his breath, but Derek could tell he
was enjoying himself because he leaned back into his arms, trusting
him and his talented fingers.

Derek could get used to this. Ishwar’s head hit Derek’s shoulders,

his rough day-old beard chafing his neck, but it wasn’t painful. His
skin was soft and yielding, but the thick growth of hair felt good. The
other man’s breathing seemed to increase, growing more ragged with
every breath. Every ounce of his body wanted to respond to the man
intimately, but this was about Ishwar’s pleasure, not his. Derek’s
erection grew harder as he felt the other man grow thicker and longer.
What he wouldn’t give to be on bottom, sucking up every drop of
Ishwar’s wad, but that could wait until another day.

“You like that, don’t you?” Derek used his hands to cup Ishwar’s

hairy balls and squeezed ever so gently, thumbing them over and
over.

“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t.”
“Your body wouldn’t lie to me. It’s telling me what you want

even if you would deny it—deny us and what we could be.”

Ishwar moaned. “I never said I didn’t want this.”
“No, you want more.” Derek grew more rhythmic in his touch,

more needy, gripping the other man’s cock with a fierce need,
building friction and heat. “You want to take what’s not yours.”

“I’ll take it when you offer yourself. I gave you a fair warning that

I don’t play games.”

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A thrill of electricity down Derek’s spine made him shiver with

pleasure. He liked the possessiveness in Ishwar’s voice, but he didn’t
respond to it well. “Why stop here? We could have so much more fun.
I would rock your world.”

Ishwar came in his hands, and Derek pressed his body against his

back, imagining himself being ridden by the man, having him come
inside of him—filling up with his seed. It was all he could do to not
come in his pants right then and there. “Damn, you don’t know what
you’re missing.”

“Yes, I do.” Immediately Ishwar’s neck and back muscles

tightened. He pulled forward out of Derek’s embrace so their skin
would not be in such close contact. He pushed Derek’s hands away
and closed his pants. “That’s what makes it so hard.”

Derek clenched his jaw before licking his fingers clean. The taste

of Ishwar lingered in his mouth, drugging him like a fine wine. “It
doesn’t have to be that hard. Fucking shouldn’t be like marriage.”

“Fucking, as you put it, isn’t marriage, but to me it does mean a

commitment of two people. You talk as if you don’t respect yourself,
my friend. I want you to know that I not only respect you, I value you,
and the sex wouldn’t be meaningless. I already knew it would be
good.”

Derek shifted his body on the back of the horse to be a little

further away from Ishwar. How could something and someone so
beautiful go to irritation in just seconds? The last thing he needed
right now was a possessive boyfriend, but his body wanted to betray
him. He shouldn’t want to spend his nights in another man’s bed,
because if he ever went there, he would get all sentimental about the
man and he knew better than to do that from past experience. Sex and
love were best kept separate. Derek had always thought it was better
to protect his heart, and keep everyone on the outside. However, if
Ishwar wanted more, he’d have to think again. Derek would just have
to work on Ishwar a little and the man would give in to his advances
eventually.

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It was rather amazing that they had not had to stop during the

whole interaction, but Derek had done it in more interesting places
than the back of a horse.

Derek tried to focus on something else besides the man in front of

him. Talking about sex and commitment worked better than a cold
shower. His erection shriveled instantly.

The cows kept their distance, preferring to stay away from the

riders, keeping close to the low brush cropping out of the grasslands.

Except for one, which seemed to be lying on its side and did not

seem to be moving.

Its stillness was oddly disconcerting as well as the shredded bits of

fur and flesh clinging to the underbrush littering the surrounding area.
“Do you see that sleeping cow over there?”

“Yeah.” Ishwar’s body tensed immediately and his hand went to

the gun on his hip as if he were preparing for a fight. “I think it is
dead.”

“Did something kill it?” Stony silence answered Derek.
Ishwar neared the animal and slid off the horse with a grim line

marking his face. He knelt down to the cow and closed his eyes,
placing his hand over the beast’s body.

* * * *


“Shouldn’t we do something?” Derek asked. He slipped

awkwardly from his seat behind Ishwar. The kid was just a little on
the clumsy side, but sexier than any cowboy should be. Too bad he
realized it and had an ego the size of Texas.

“Like what?” The animal was still warm, but its life energy had

passed. He shook his head. “The animal that did this is long gone.”

“Well, what do you do with dead cows? Don’t you bury them?”
Ishwar held back the laughter that threatened to erupt from his

gut. They would be standing here all day digging and still not get a

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hole deep enough to fit a half-ton carcass. “No. We don’t bury the
cows when they die.”

“Please don’t tell me you’re gonna make hamburger out of him?”
“No, we don’t eat it either.”
“Then what do we do with— Oh my freaking God! That cow just

moved!”

What? The kid probably saw one too many Freddy Krueger

movies. “It can’t move.” Ishwar scrutinized Derek for a sign of jest.
There was none. He was dead serious. There was shock in his eyes.
“It’s dead.” Ishwar was more than a little irritated at that
uncharacteristic jumpiness of Derek. He knew the young man had no
experience with animals, but the cow was dead.

“Look!” Derek pointed to the cow. “There it goes again.”
Ishwar frowned. Disbelieving, he turned his attention back to the

cow. Bite marks to the neck were probably how the creature brought
the cow down.

Well, whatever had done this wasn’t human.
The obvious sign of death was the jugular ripped open and

dripping blood down the poor cow’s hide. It had bled to death and
been left to rot. The thing had killed it for fun.

Suddenly the cow’s stomach dipped and kicked.
“There. Did you see that?”
Ishwar got up to a standing position. “The cow is pregnant.”
“Well, isn’t there something we can do?” A note of desperation

laced Derek’s voice and his jaw clenched. The boy was willing to
fight for the calf’s life. The problem was that Ishwar wasn’t sure he
was willing to try. Derek didn’t know what he was asking.

“Without its mother, the calf will die.”
“Not if we help it. I can feed it in the mornings since I am in the

barn every day anyway. Please! We have to try.”

“If this is what you want.” Ishwar removed the knife from its

sheath at his belt.

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“What are you going to do with that?” Derek looked at him with

concern.

“You’ll see,” Ishwar growled. “She can’t deliver naturally.”

Derek’s face turned pale. “The baby needs oxygen and for this to be
over quickly to live. This is the only way.”

“Just make it quick.” Derek covered his face, suddenly

understanding what Ishwar meant to do.

“Don’t worry.” With two hands he stabbed the cow just below the

rib cage and sliced the thick hide in a line down her belly. He dropped
his jacket to the ground and rolled up his sleeves. “She won’t feel a
thing.”

“I think I am going to be sick.” Derek made gagging noises

behind him.

“Turn around and don’t look if you can’t handle it.” Ishwar didn’t

have too much time before the animal would begin to die naturally.
With no blood flow, no nutrients, and no oxygen, the creature had five
minutes or less. Who knew how long it had been since the mom had
died, but there was only a little time left.

“Oh fuck. Now the horse is wandering off. How do I catch him?”
Ishwar looked up to see the horse grazing about twenty feet away.

The horse’s head dropped to the ground, content to eat the little grass
he could find.

“He’ll be fine as long as he doesn’t go too far.” Most of the horses

needed to be tied up or chased, but this horse belonged to him and
was smarter than the average cattle pony. The horse just needed to
stay within earshot. Ishwar had trained the horse to respond to a
whistle, and the gelding was quick to come when he called him. “Do
you think you can help me with this?”

Derek knelt down beside him. “I hope so.”
Ishwar had done this before to help the veterinarian, but that was

with anesthesia, and the environment was not sterile, but it was
cleaner than this. He pulled the stomach open and reached inside. The
calf kicked and shimmied beneath the thin membrane protecting it. He

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used his blade to cut it, doing his best to not hurt the calf even by
accident. He reached in, grabbed one hoof, and then the other he
motioned to Derek to grab hold of. “Help me pull him straight out.”
Together they pulled the creature from the interior of the mother’s
stomach.

A thin, mucky layer of fluid and blood coated its skin. It was thin,

but it looked big enough that it would have delivered naturally any
day now. Ishwar ran his hand over the animal’s nose and eyes to clear
the airway. The calf was limp at first, lying in a squished pile of legs
and hooves.

“Is it even alive?” Derek asked.
Ishwar grimaced. He’d hate to break the man’s heart, but chances

were against the calf from the start. Even if it were still alive. He
wiped more muck from its mouth, feeling he damned well did not
want to have to give the calf mouth-to-mouth. “I’m not sure.”

Suddenly the calf bleated. Derek lit up like a neon sign, his smile

spread wide across his face, but it wasn’t just that. Something deep
inside of him seemed altered from the experience. His energy
changed. “Oh Ishwar. Thank God, you saved him. Do you do that all
the time?”

“We have to deliver a cow from time to time, if he is turned the

wrong way, but this…” He motioned out to the desert in the general
direction of the dead mother. “This is not natural. Jesse will want to
know what happened.”

“Do you know what could have done this?”
Fear wasn’t something Ishwar felt often, but he knew too much to

believe this was an accident. There were legends his people told of
some dark creatures who usually kept to the nightlight but that were
now venturing into the light of day. The tracks were so much larger
than a coyote or a wolf. He would have to talk to the council about
this if his fears were correct. “I have an idea, but I hope I’m wrong. If
the Wendigo has returned…” He shook his head because he didn’t

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want to think about what it meant. “Let’s just hope I’m mistaken, for
all of our sakes.”

Derek gave him a questioning look, but Ishwar didn’t feel like

explaining to the man about his people’s secrets just yet.

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Chapter Five


Derek held the bottle of milk aloft and the calf eagerly drank,

bumping his hand off balance more than once. He sat on the milk
crate and scratched under the calf’s chin. Despite his red eyes, he
didn’t feel tired. Coffee and sugar ran through his blood, and he
wasn’t about to let the little guy down.

“You need a break. You’ve been in there every hour for the last

two days.” Luke leaned against the pen’s gate, laughing.

“I just want to give the little guy half a chance.” Derek dropped

the bottle and had to wipe straw from the nipple before returning it to
the calf’s mouth.

“He can go a few hours without you. Why don’t you take a break

and get yourself a nap? I’ll tell one of the other guys to take over for
you.”

“I don’t know if I could.”
“You have to sleep sometime, greenhorn.”
“Okay, but I’ll be thinking about him the whole time I am gone.”
The calf finished the last drop of milk and kept mouthing the

nipple until it fell from Derek’s grasp once more. “That’s all. There’s
no more. You drank it all.” He scratched the calf’s ear and the calf
seemed content to lick his fingers before nosing around the straw.

Derek made his way out of the pen, leaving the calf a feedbag of

grain. He still wasn’t eating anything more than milk yet, but it
wouldn’t be long before he caught on. The latch caught on the way
out, marked by a metallic ring.

“You haven’t seen Ishwar lately, have you?” Ever since they got

back to the ranch, the Indian seemed to have been avoiding Derek. He

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had expected things would be developing to some serious nookie by
now, but it was like Ishwar got his rocks off and suddenly he
disappeared in the wind. It was unexplainable and nobody seemed to
know where Ishwar had gone.

“I don’t know. He didn’t say anything more when he left than

he’d be gone a couple of days.”

“Oh.” Derek couldn’t keep the disappointment from his voice.
“But he could have gone to Remington’s Bar and Grill

downtown.” Luke shrugged his shoulders.

“Why do you think he’d be there?” It wouldn’t be the first place

he’d look, but Logan didn’t have a reason to lie to him either.

“It’s the closest watering hole to this sleepy town. Lots of guys

drink their paycheck before they can spend it.”

“I’d go check it out, but I don’t have a car.”
“I can give you a lift if you want.”
“Thanks.”
“No big deal.”

* * * *


“Aww, it’s too early. No one’s here yet.” Taylor looked around

the restaurant, disappointed to find only a handful of customers were
in the bar. He gave a dimpled grin to his friends before heading to the
pool tables in the corner. “Anybody up for a game of pool?”

“Naw, maybe later,” Derek replied. He had tagged along with his

coworkers for a night on the town, but he really wanted to check out
the bar and see if Ishwar was there.

Three of the cowboys followed Taylor to the tables, and two more

headed to the bar for their beers. Derek walked the perimeter,
checking out all the patrons’ faces closely. Although a few Indians
were there, none of them was his Indian friend. Most of the men were
cowboys who had probably come into the closest watering hole to
wherever they worked. All of the guys were dressed in their good

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jeans—the ones without holes and dust. The few ladies in the bar had
at least three men surrounding each of them.

Hell, he was in a straight bar.
Derek hadn’t been in one of these places for years. Not since he

tried to go straight and got himself a job washing dishes at the White
Elephant Bar. This would be interesting.

Not.
There would be no man-loving tonight. He couldn’t even distract

himself with a drink.

Where the hell was that Indian anyhow?

* * * *


“I am telling you, we have a problem.” Ishwar clenched his teeth,

attempting to rein in his rising temper. The elders didn’t believe him,
didn’t want to see what was going on right under their noses.

“Without any proof—”
“By then it will be too late. What do I have to do? Bring back the

head of a Wendigo on a platter?” Ishwar was furious they didn’t seem
to believe him.

“Even if what you say is true, the contract is not broken unless

they have set foot on our land. We are still bound to honor peace
between us.” The chief eyed him patiently over the long wooden
table.

“They are wolves in sheep’s clothing. It is only a matter of time

before one bites us,” Ishwar argued.

“They aren’t to be trusted,” Banyan, the tribe’s historian, agreed.
“I don’t think there is anything to worry about. Those are just

stories our forefathers told us to keep us afraid of the dark.”

“No, the stories are true.”
“Then we have to act now, before they do.”
“No. We must wait and find out what they have planned, why

they are here.”

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“Well, first we will have to find out where they are staying.”
“Or if it’s really Wendigo at all. How do we know? Ishwar saw

tracks but it could be anything, a wolf, a stray dog.”

“It’s the Wendigo.”
“Did you trail them to find out? Where are they?”
“Of course not. You wanted me to ask them if they really were the

shape-shifters of our legends? Go into their den and announce who I
am? You might as well ask me to wear barbeque sauce.” Ishwar was
irritated he would suggest such a thing. It would be one thing if there
were a party of warriors, but just him? One lone medicine man? It
would be stupidity.

“If Ishwar says it is the Wendigo—then I believe him. He knows

the signs to look for and can recognize them just as we all do.”

“Then I say we go and find out exactly what we are dealing with.”
“I’ll go.”
“Me too.”
“I should not have been gone this long.”
“Ishwar, you have to go to show us what you found. It is your

responsibility and we must ensure the humans nearby do not discover
the Wendigo before we do.”

“I know my duty, Father.” He didn’t mind showing a troupe of

hunters the tracks, or the prey that was left to rot. What bothered him
most was that it would be another day he would be gone. Jesse
wouldn’t worry about him, but he was just beginning to crack beneath
Derek’s protective walls and get close to him. He hated the fact that
listening to his father and being loyal to the tribe meant another day
away from Derek.

* * * *


“Why aren’t you drinking, buddy?” One of the field hands from

Jesse’s ranch was drinking a lot, stacking the beer glasses up in front
of him.

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“I can’t drink.” He made a vow not to drink after losing his best

friend in an accident after partying.

“Oh. Good for you for getting help.” The cowboy gave him a

sloppy grin.

“No, you don’t understand. I just don’t drink. I’ve been through

too much and besides my wallet’s empty. I guess I’m just here for the
company.”

“The company’s not that good. Have one on me.” The guy gave

him a lopsided grin and motioned to the barkeep. “Bartender, get him
a soda or something.”

“Thanks, but I don’t know when I can pay you back.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“Thanks. What’s your name again? I know I’ve seen you around,

but I still can’t remember all the names of everyone.”

“My real name hasn’t been used in so long I think I forgot it.

Everyone just calls me Bear.”

“Bear?” Derek could see why. He was a round man with a grizzly

three-inch beard. A Texas Rangers baseball cap sat on top of his head.
He reminded Derek of a teddy bear, but bigger. Still, the name felt
awkward to him. He tried to roll the name over his tongue once more
to help him remember. “Thanks, Bear.”

The bartender asked him what he would have. Derek responded

with a Pepsi. The caffeine and sugar wouldn’t matter. He wasn’t
planning on sleeping very soon tonight anyhow.

The cold wind blew in as the door slammed open, chilling every

person in the bar. Three model-fine men walked inside. The kind of
man who looked like he just walked off a Ralph Lauren runway, and
with three men that sexy, every head in the room turned to watch
them as they came in. The first two walked side by side, and were
stunning. Square shoulders framed their athletic bodies. Waves of
dark brown hair framed the first one’s face. The other had dishwater
blond hair, but he kept his in more of a military look, shaved close to
the scalp and gelled to perfection.

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But the third man—he was breathtaking.
“No man should look that fine.” His fair white skin held a natural

glow and provided a dramatic backdrop to his raven black hair, which
fell to his shoulders, with streaks of silver on his temples. The age
should have been a turn-off, but it was a total turn-on. The guy looked
totally lickable. Downright edible. Derek blushed immediately. He
hadn’t meant to stare or to comment, but it was hard not to. The last
thing he needed right now was to draw attention to himself. “Who are
they?”

“Yeah, you talking about those guys who just came in? They

never socialize much. I don’t know why the Collin brothers bother
coming.” Derek watched the room part; men stepped to the side and
every eye was glued to the new group. One of the women left her
date, feeling the same damn attraction as Derek, and was immediately
rebuffed. Turned away, she stalked back to her date. The waitress
ignored several tables to take their order, flirting shamelessly and
thrusting her bosom out in front of her like a weapon. “Steal all the
women, drink all the beer, and then leave so fast those star-struck gals
won’t even talk to a regular guy.”

“But you said the Collin brothers never go home with any of

them?” How odd. If they were looking for a sexual conquest they
could pick it up easily enough for all the women throwing themselves
at them.

“Never.”
“Then maybe it’s not what they are looking for.” Men didn’t go to

bars to dance. It was either to drink or get lucky. Bars and nightclubs
were the watering holes of this century, where stealthy hunters could
walk away with a win, but the fact that they didn’t made him wonder
what they were there for. He gazed upon them for a few minutes,
unable to determine anything from their actions. He couldn’t put his
finger on it, but something was odd about those guys.

“Hey look, it’s the pussy dressing up to play a cowboy.” Laughter

answered the vicious remark.

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Derek’s neck snapped violently toward his verbal assaulter. How

the hell had he not noticed Bo and two of his cronies come up right
next to him? Involuntarily, he shrank back in his seat and his bottom
lip curled.

“Hey, knock it off, Bo. The kid’s got the heart of a cowboy and

that’s what matters,” Bear intervened.

“My business ain’t with you, Bear. I was talking to the pansy

sitting next to you.”

“Bo, this isn’t the place for trouble.” Bear’s voice was low and

warning.

“What the fuck do you want?” Derek had purposely stayed away

from him since the last incident. Avoided him like the plague.
Running into him here sucked big hairy donkey balls.

“The stupid prick got me a warning at work and put on

probation.”

Derek stole one last look at the guys behind Bo and his friends.

Stunning blue eyes met his gaze, captivating him. It was hard to look
away and when he finally did, his eyes met Bo’s fury in his gaze.

“What are you looking at?” A vein popped at his neck. The guy

was a volcano ready to explode.

“Nothin’.” Derek looked away quickly. This wasn’t the place or

the time he wanted a confrontation, but he was getting one whether he
liked it or not. A spark of defiance lit a fire inside him. Angry fists
clenched his gut. What the fuck had he done in a previous life to
deserve this? It didn’t feel like he could say anything to diffuse the
situation, and if he was going to get his ass kicked he may as well
deserve it. “Nothing but your ugly mug.”

“You tryin’ to mess with me, boy?”
“You’re the one starting a fight, not me.”
“I don’t need to start something with a piece of shit like you.” Bo

grabbed Derek’s shirt collar, jerking him off his bar stool. “I finish
shit.”

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“Asshole.” Derek spit in the other man’s face, grasped his wrists

firmly in his fingers, and wrenched the other man’s hands away from
him.

“No way, man. Don’t do this here.” Bear tried the gentle

approach, pulling at Bo’s arm, but that gave Derek just the opening he
needed for a quick jab.

Bo fought back, throwing a roundhouse punch, but Derek ducked

low and head-butted the other man in the stomach.

The crowd of onlookers sounded like they were cheering the fight

on.

“Call the cops, Johnny. We got a bar fight.” A blond waitress

shook her head in disgust.

“Why, you little fucker! You’re going to pay, you little shit.” Bo

pushed Derek to the ground and fell on top of his body, straddling his
hips. He was unforgiving and immediate in his punishment,
pummeling Derek with his fists. Anger and frustration fueled his
attack. He was too quick for Derek to get a counterattack in. Derek
covered his head with his arms, doing his best to defend himself from
a serious blow. A crack of bone against bone sounded, as Bo’s fist
landed on his rib cage. The brutal crunch left him twisted in pain. A
painful fire lit his lungs and made it difficult to breathe. He could
hardly move because the pain was too intense. He knew he couldn’t
just lie there on the floor; a shadow was overtaking his vision. If he
blacked out, the man could kill him.

Desperation sparked Derek’s last act. He lifted his leg sharply,

hoping to do some damage to the man’s jewels. A sharp knee to the
groin brought the man down on top of him. Bo’s lungs emptied. His
face contorted and he grabbed his balls before rolling to the side.

“Motherfucker,” Bo groaned, pulling himself to a standing

position and then hulking over Derek’s body, tapping his own chest
with a fist. “You want more of this?”

“You boys going to take this outside, or do I got to get nasty?”

Johnny the bartender looked ready to join in the brawl. A bright,

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shiny aluminum baseball bat was thwacking against the palm of his
hand to back up his threats.

“Hey, I didn’t want to fight. It was Bo’s—whoa.”
Bo grabbed him and lifted him over his head. He struggled to be

free, but the man seemed superhuman, turning their wrestling match
into a game of horseshoes, throwing Derek across the room like he
was a ragdoll. A table broke his fall.

Derek groaned, closing his eyes to the world. The problem was it

didn’t lock out the searing pain. “Shit, that hurt.”

“Damn it! I said take it outside!” Johnny slid over the bar like Bo

Duke. He smashed the bat into a wooden column for effect. Nobody
paid any attention to his warning, standing around the room watching
the fight like a bunch of mannequins.

“I said to call the cops, not join in the fray. Why do I have to do

everything myself?” The waitress made a run for the phone on the
wall behind the bar.

“Stand down, gringo,” a voice behind Derek growled.
Derek looked behind him to the man who just spoke. Fuck, it was

the eldest Collin brother. This was not the way he wanted to meet the
man.

“I don’t need any help,” Derek grumbled, grabbing his side before

rolling off the table. Bo might be beating the shit out of him, but he
was going to share the pain before he went down in the fight.

“I didn’t ask if you needed help.” His voice was gruff, but Derek

sensed a protective nature to his stance.

“Mister, no offense, but I have this under control.” Derek

motioned him out of the way, but the man didn’t listen. He stepped
directly between Bo and Derek. The man turned to glare at Derek and
something in his eyes made him shrink back.

“Word of advice, kid,” Bo turned to speak to Derek. “It’s best not

to give Lucas any lip and just let him do what he wants. Goes much
easier that way. For everyone.” Another of the brothers pulled Derek

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aside and gave him a smile that would have melted his insides if he’d
had time to think.

Bo growled, rushing Lucas before he could turn around, tackling

the man to the floor. The bartender was hanging back, but after the
last attack he must have decided who the troublemaker was and chose
his victim. He lifted the baseball bat over his head and swung at Bo.
The metal bat impacted Bo’s back with a loud thwack. Metal met
bone in a painful explosion, and Bo’s body flew back into a nearby
table. The table and two wooden chairs crashed to pieces on the floor.

“Break it up,” Johnny threatened to beat the brawlers again,

waving his bat in the air.

Bo lifted his head, his bottom lip curled up in a menacing

grimace. The exchange of fists between Lucas and Bo had taken only
a second. The confrontation was over quickly and painfully. Lucas
snapped his fist into the other man’s chest before turning another
punch, snapping Bo’s head back. Bo’s limbs hung limp and his head
flailed to one side. A line of blood dribbled from the corner of his
mouth.

“Stay down, Bodine!” Derek wasn’t sure which one of the Collin

brothers had yelled, but it seemed like good advice to him. Bo, being
more muscle than brains, struggled to get up before collapsing to the
wooden floor. “Shit, stay down or the alpha will kill you!”

A deep, menacing growl emanated from Lucas’s chest, a sound so

dangerously primal that the hairs stood up on the back of Derek’s
neck. If he didn’t see a man in front of him, he would have sworn it
was an animal making that noise.

Bo glared at the other man standing over him, but thank God he

finally gave up and lay on the floor. Derek was afraid Bo might
actually die if he took much more abuse. Derek hated him, but Bo
didn’t deserve a savage beating, just a good ass kicking.

“You better get out of here. The cops are on the way,” the waitress

whispered furtively to Derek and Lucas.

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“Fine.” With Derek’s track record, he’d get arrested and it

wouldn’t help to have a new arrest on his record when he went to
court next month. He took a step toward the door, and searing pain
raced up his leg. He pulled back his weight off the leg and leaned
against the nearest chair. He hissed out a breath, knowing he wouldn’t
be able to walk on it, and his chest hurt with each breath. He may
have some broken ribs. “Oh fuck.”

“You’re hurt. Let me take a look at that.” Concern knit Lucas’

brow.

“No time. It’s fine, I’m fine. I can’t stay. I just gotta get out of

here.”

“I’ll take you home.”
Back to the ranch? No fucking thank you. Derek had had enough

of being some ass-wipe the local bad-ass cowboy could pick on.

“Where do you want to go?” Lucas slung an arm over his shoulder

and hefted a good deal of Derek’s bodyweight with it. Derek leaned
into him and limped his way to the door.

“Anywhere but here.”

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Chapter Six

Lucas kept one eye on the road, and the other on his unusual

human passenger. He normally didn’t bother with humans, but this
man smelled…different. Derek was under the belief that Lucas was
everything he appeared to be, a normal man just helping another guy
out in a bar fight. Lucas had that familiar tingling in his belly that
recognized another of his kind, but he didn’t smell human. A rich
earth scent surrounded Derek, and Lucas’s senses whirled as if he had
been running in the forest. Adrenaline pumped through his veins,
demanding a physical outlet. Ordinarily on a night like tonight, he’d
run wild and free for hours until all of his built-up energy was spent.

Some kind of magic called to his Lycan senses, and Lucas wasn’t

sure he could put his finger on what it was. It was that same niggling
feeling that made him choose to help the man earlier over one of his
own kind. Bo made his choice when he chose not to listen to the
alpha.

Looking at the man next to him was stirring something else—a

strong sexual hunger unlike anything he had known before. His cock
rose in his lap, demanding satisfaction.

Down, boy.
“So, you never told me where you lived.”
“I don’t really want to go home.” Derek rubbed his forehead, but

his breath left in a hiss of pain when he touched his eye.

Lucas watched him with concern. “I could also take you to a

hospital to get that eye and those ribs looked at.”

“Then when I get there, they will call the cops. No thank you.”

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“That’s okay too.” The young man was scared and didn’t want to

go home or feel safe reaching out for help, and Lucas could identify
with that. “I’ve been there once or twice.” It had been many years
since he felt so restless, but he could identify with that feeling. The
years before he fought for the position of alpha with his pack, he
spent running away. When he reached sexual maturity he couldn’t
handle living by anyone else’s rules, so he lived alone. “We can just
drive if you want.”

“Sure.”
“Just let me know when you get tired or want to pull over or I

could get a motel room if you need the rest.”

“I might take you up on that offer.” Derek laughed halfheartedly

but it broke into a coughing fit. The fight might have done more
damage to his body than Lucas originally thought. He was merely
human after all. The Wendigo healed quickly and it took much more
to take one of them out. “Why are you being so nice? Do you want
something from me?”

Lucas paused to think about that before answering. “I’m asking

myself that same question.” He shouldn’t be interested in the man at
all, yet he could not deny this attraction. It wasn’t unusual for a
Wendigo to take a male lover, but it was usually the lower-class males
that did so and it was never a human. It was important for the alpha to
take a mate to continue the bloodline from the strongest male. This
made this strange attraction hard to wrap his mind around. “Don’t
worry. I won’t rape you if that’s what you’re thinking. You’re too
fucked up already.”

Lucas drove to the edge of town, away from the hustle and bustle

of town. He pulled into a motel with half the light bulbs out, so the
sign read “otel.” He got a room with a king-sized bed, and helped
Derek to his room. “I won’t stay. I just want to be sure you are all
right and take a look at your head. You got a nasty gash from that
fight.”

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“Okay. I don’t mind if you do stay. I like your company. Is it me

or is the room spinning?” Derek leaned against the wall and held his
head.

“It’s just you.” Lucas looked at him with concern knotting his

brow. He wrapped his arm around Derek’s waist and helped him to
the bed dominating the room. “Why don’t you let me help you lie
down? I may be able to help you feel slightly better. A Saskatchewan
medicine man taught me a few tricks that might work.”

Derek crawled onto the bed and collapsed, his breath hissing out

in pain.

“I have to get you out of these clothes.”
“Why?”
“Don’t worry, I won’t take advantage of you… Unless you ask me

to.” Lucas chuckled under his breath at the young man’s modesty.
Derek’s fair skin was bruised and battered, but his cheeks grew red
with embarrassment. He was actually blushing. How refreshingly
sweet! “I need to take a look at how bad your injuries are.”

He also needed the skin-to-skin contact for the healing to actually

work.

Lucas unbuttoned Derek’s shirt, carefully lifting the other man’s

arms out of the sleeves to avoid any additional pain. Derek’s chest
was already beginning to turn black and blue, and in the worst places
the bruises were green. His irregular, ragged breaths concerned Lucas.
He could have internal damage to his lungs or internal bleeding that
Lucas couldn’t see. Without some kind of medical care he could drift
off to sleep and never wake up. However, Lucas knew the chance for
that was minimal. What concerned him most was the man’s leg. He
should have stopped limping by now, yet he still favored it. The leg
could be anything from bruised to broken and he wouldn’t know what
it was until he took a look.

Lucas reached for the man’s pants, but Derek stopped him with

his hand. “You got to let me do this if you want help,” Lucas said.

“I’ll be fine.”

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“If you were fine you wouldn’t still be limping.”
“It must have had something to do with being thrown twenty feet

across the room. How the fuck did he do that? I know I am not
exactly a big guy, but he doesn’t look that strong either.”

“He might have been doped up on ice, or it could have been the

endorphins.”

“Yeah, that must have been it. I’ve heard stories about mothers

being able to do crazy-ass things like lift cars off their kids when they
have adrenaline running through their blood.”

Lucas kept his mouth shut, but the things his people were capable

of doing under the pretense of war were legendary. On the battlefield,
pumped on adrenaline, they were once called Berserkers, compared to
gods. Today they kept their physical abilities hidden so they would
not stick out like sore thumbs from the humans they lived among, but
if it came down to defending their mates or their families from a
human, there would be no question as to the winner.

“You have to take your pants off. I won’t look. I promise.”
“I’ve had lots of men do more than look. Just don’t think it’s an

open invitation.”

“Do you really think I would be that easy?” Lucas made a

distasteful snort. “I won’t be jumping your bones just because your
pants are down.” A streak of anger fueled by jealousy crossed Lucas’s
spine. He wanted this man to belong to him, and the fact he turned
away the possibilities spurned him. From the size of his erection, it
was clear he felt this attraction too, so why would he say no? He
undid the snap to the jeans, and worked at the zipper. Derek lifted his
butt off the bed to help ease the pants over his hips. They came off
quite easily, but the lack of clothing made his erection painfully
evident.

“You should have warned me you were packing a gun,” Lucas

joked.

Derek chuckled but lay still beneath him. “I thought you said you

wouldn’t look.”

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“I lied.” Lucas smiled. It was hard to ignore the rising flesh. It was

harder to restrain his desires, not to reach out and cup Derek’s balls in
his hands, suck the length of him into his mouth just to hear the other
man’s groans of satisfaction. It had been a long time since he felt this
much hunger for another person, let alone a human. He should be
healing him, not playing with him. “Close your eyes.”

Derek’s eyes flew shut, a tight line at his mouth the only sign of

emotion on his face.

At least he was obedient.
Lucas held his hands above Derek’s body, pushing down until he

could feel the ebb and flow of his life force through his aura. A
painful red marked the spots where the man was wounded and hurt
the most. He pushed his mind’s eye deeper, reaching beneath flesh to
see broken bone. One of the bones in his leg had a hairline fracture,
and the tissue surrounding it was badly bruised. His ribs were broken
in two places, causing him pain with each breath.

Lucas took the pain into himself, absorbing it, then reached deeper

and used his mental strength and the electrical currents from the life
energy he could feel in the room to heal the flesh and bone, mending
the break and soothing the pain. He kept pushing his energy into the
other man until his aura returned to a healthy shade of green and the
man took even breaths showing how his body relaxed.

He took his time to examine the other man’s face. For such a

young man, he had suffered. There were creases in his brow that
should belong to an older, more mature man, and he knew from the
little he had talked to him on the way here that he guarded his heart.
He probed further wondering what shape his spirit was in.

He could heal his body, but the soul it protected had also been

wounded. There were cuts that ran deep in the man’s spirit.

What had happened to him?
Derek’s lips parted and Lucas felt an irresistible urge to kiss him.

He leaned over Derek’s body, brushing his lips over the other man’s
mouth in the lightest of touches. Derek’s eyes fluttered open and his

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mouth opened and closed like a fish, as if he wanted to protest what
had just happened. Desire. Confusion. Fear. It was all there in his
expression for anyone to read.

God help him. He wanted to kiss him again.
“I shouldn’t have done that.” Lucas suddenly pulled away. He felt

disturbed that he had broken the trust he was given. It wasn’t like him
to break his word, and a wolf was only as good as his word. “Sorry I
kissed you.”

Derek sat up suddenly and rubbed his ribs. “I don’t know what

you did but thank you. I don’t feel any pain anymore.”

“But you didn’t like having me touch you.”
“It’s not that.” Derek shook his head, turning his gaze to the floor.
“Then, what? You don’t like my kisses?”
“There’s someone else.”
“If it doesn’t feel right, then you don’t have to do anything. I feel

something when I am with you that I can’t explain, but if you don’t
feel that same attraction then I am not going to force myself on you.”

The worry lines on Derek’s face intensified. “I didn’t say I didn’t

like you. I feel that attraction too.” He placed his hand on Lucas’s
chest, the corners of his mouth dragged down by the frown. “It’s
just…without him here it feels like I am cheating on him.”

“You two have a commitment?”
“No, but…” Derek closed his eyes, seemingly unsure of what to

say next.

“But what?”
“Fuck, it could be something special. I didn’t ask for a

commitment, but I don’t want to do something stupid to lose him.”

“So you have slept with this other man?” Why did he feel jealous?

He shouldn’t care about him, much less feel the prongs of jealous
anger rise up from deep within him.

“We barely even kissed. I won’t lie to you.” Derek’s words were

low and throaty, filled with need and the restrained desire that he felt
beneath the surface. “I want to fuck you. I want to be fucked by you. I

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want to feel you enter me from behind and drive your cock into my
ass, loading it up with cum, but I feel guilty.”

“Then what’s the hang-up? It could be just this once—to get it out

of our system.” It was a lie. Lucas knew it the moment he uttered the
words, but he didn’t care. He wanted this man, even if he had to lie to
get him. “You never have to see me again after tonight.”

“Just this once.” Derek’s voice was soft and dreamy as he moved

in for the kiss. His lips smashed against Lucas. Swift. Passionate.
Conveying everything he wanted—needed from the other man. Lucas
answered with his own desire, lust driving his kiss, and he felt
Derek’s hard body against his own. Rubbing his cock into the other
man’s groin. Hungry for more.

His skin was soft as silk, but it covered muscles of steel.
Derek reached for Lucas’s groin and met his hard-on eagerly. He

unleashed the monster from its confines in seconds. Lucas was good.
He had him undressed before he realized what had happened. A wide
grin spread over his face as his eyes dropped to stare at Lucas’s
package wagging in the air. “Nice hardware, Ace.”

A feral growl escaped his chest as he leapt to cover Derek’s body

with his own.

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Chapter Seven


“Where were you all night?”
Lucas’s bubbly mood disappeared in seconds at his sister’s

accusing stare. She met him at the front door of his home dressed in
the clothes she wore yesterday, a wrinkled pink cotton T-shirt and her
Calvin Klein jeans with the rhinestones on the pockets.

“Out.” He closed the door behind him and prepared to ignore her,

walking around her to the stairs at the back of the kitchen.

“Jeff told everyone about you going out with some human last

night.”

“What do you care? I’m back now, aren’t I?”
“You chose to defend a human over one of your own.”
“It’s not for you to question.”
“I am not the one questioning, big brother.”
“Jeff?”
“Vincent is seeking to undermine your authority, and this gives

him just the advantage he wanted.”

“Then let him challenge me for leadership.”
“He won’t have to if everyone in the pack questions your

judgment and leaves on their own. Your job is to protect us.”

“I know what my job is!”
“Do you?”
“Damn it, Jeanine, why’d you have to bring this up now?”
“You’re my brother and I care for you. I don’t want to see you

lose everything you worked so hard for. So what happened last
night?”

“Bodine was at the bar last night.”

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“The rogue?”
“Yeah, and he picked a fight with a human.”
“Yeah, but did you have to side with the human?”
“We can’t risk exposing the Wendigo, and Bodine was doing just

that.”

“So it didn’t have anything to do with your new play toy? I can

smell him all over you, Lucas. You reek of human and sex.” She
squished up her nose distastefully.

“I can’t change who my mate is. The fact that he’s human or the

fact that I have to protect him. Even over one of my own.”

“Oh Lucas! Why didn’t you say so in the first place? You have to

talk to the rest of the pack before it’s too late.”

“Now you see my point.”
“What are you going to do?” she asked quietly. “He’s human. You

said it yourself.”

He knew there were obstacles, and he needed time to think about

this. How could he win over the man, convince him that they were
meant for each other? How would Derek react when he found out
what he really was? How would the rest of the Wendigo take him as
one of the pack? Not to mention that it still left Lucas open for
opposition. Derek couldn’t give him a baby to continue the line, and
that was supposed to be the purpose of finding a mate, wasn’t it?

This was going to be a long, hard, uphill battle and Jeanine was

the least of his worries. All of his other problems were worse. This
was only the beginning.

“Then what do you plan on doing?” Jeanine touched his arm,

concern written all over her face.

“I don’t know, Jeanine.” He wanted Derek in his house and in his

bed, but keeping him there wouldn’t be so easy. “I just don’t know
yet, but I think I may have to talk to Bodine. He nearly exposed us
last night. He’ll have to leave Texas.”

“I’ll go round him up.” His sister smiled and he knew she would

welcome the opportunity to leave the compound, but he needed to

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know she was safe. Protected. It was his job to see that no harm came
to her.

“No, I’ll send Jacob and Kyle. I don’t trust him to come

willingly.”

* * * *


Lucas looked curiously out the bay window, chewing on the

bottom of his pen. A flurry of snowflakes drifted from the gray sky
above, blanketing the land in white snow.

He would have to limit the pack’s nighttime activities. This snow

would make tracking much easier, and the ranchers would be only too
happy to hunt them down if they found a single footstep.

Two nights ago, Jacob had been shot at just because he came too

close. Cowboys shoot on sight. They don’t trust wolves anywhere
near their cattle.

Suddenly the door to his study burst open. Jacob was back from

his mission and it didn’t look like Bo came willingly. His hands were
tied behind him and the fierce look in his eyes didn’t bode well for his
outcome today. If he didn’t listen to reason, he would face the
consequences regardless of his attitude.

“Ah, so it’s my fearless leader, Lucas.”
“Show some respect, mongrel!” Jacob tripped Bo and he landed

on his knees.

Lucas shook his head in disapproval. “Leave us, Jacob.”
“But he just—”
“It’s okay. Just wait outside the door. I’ll call you if I need you.”
Jacob shuffled his feet, mumbling under his breath. Ever since

he’d come into sexual maturity, the boy was a little too quick to fly
off the handle. He’d have to learn to control his temper if he wanted
to stay within the protection of the pack.

“So what do I owe the pleasure of this meeting to?” Bodine didn’t

get off his knees, but instead chose to stay in that submissive position

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in front of his pack leader. He may have gone rogue, choosing to run
alone, but he still held respect for the local alpha.

Which was a good sign.
“Bodine, I think you know.”
“I hate that name,” he mumbled.
“Then what do you choose to be called over your birth name?”
“Bo.”
“Bo, then.” Lucas sensed the anger underlying the cool façade of

his old friend and pack member. Bo’s nostrils flared and a vein
throbbed in his arm. His fists were probably clenched behind him.
“This isn’t easy for me to say.”

“Then don’t.”
“I have to exile you from this territory.”
“I don’t live by your rules. I am outside your jurisdiction because

I don’t live here.”

“The other night, you involved me when you nearly tore that bar

down by yourself.”

“I have a job.” Bo spit on the floor. His saliva pooled, but was

quickly absorbed into the Persian carpet. “I can’t just leave my life
here because you don’t like me.”

“You have three days to wrap up any loose ends and go. If I or

any member of the pack finds you after that, then you will wish you
left. If I find you stayed, then you’ll die by my hand.”

“This is about that human, isn’t it?”
Goddamn! Why did he have to drag Derek into this? Of course, it

had something to do with his decision, but he couldn’t let Bo know
that. Or that Derek was his mate. Bo could use that weakness against
him.

“It’s about you and your actions endangering the rest of us. You

nearly exposed us the other night and I can’t allow that to happen.”
Lucas walked around behind Bo and took his knife from his belt. He
cut the bonds with one swipe of the blade.

“You haven’t seen the last of me.”

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“Just give me a reason to kill you,” Lucas responded calmly.
Bo turned on his heels and left without another word.
“Three days is all I’ll give you, Bo,” Lucas called out after him.

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Chapter Eight


Life sucks and then you die.
Derek pounded the pavement, one foot in front of the other.

Haunting his old digs only brought unwelcome memories. He felt
lost, and unsure where he really wanted to go.

It would be so easy to just keep walking, to get out of Dodge and

start a new life somewhere else. Forget his future court date, and run
from Bo and all of his problems, but he didn’t want to have to start
over again.

Sex last night made him feel really good until it was over and he

awakened alone in the seedy hotel. It had been a long time since he’d
had sex just for the enjoyment of it and not for money.

This part of town wasn’t kept up really well. The streets were

small and crowded, with parked cars on both sides only allowing one
car to pass at a time. The weeds grew as high as small bushes, and
there were a lot of fences that circled the yards and up to the sidewalk.
It was a small attempt to keep the riffraff on the streets, off the
owner’s personal property.

Most of the cars were older. The few cars that were really nice

had tinted windows, and had lots of money dumped into them by the
drug dealers. It was a good place to put cash when you couldn’t put it
in a bank, and Derek doubted they would want the IRS to know about
their work-at-home business. So they did things that they could take
personal pride in, like invest money in their cars. The lowered bodies
and custom rims were favorites, but Derek had known of at least one
car, a white Cadillac Escalade, that had been armored with bulletproof
steel.

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The sound of a car’s engine purred behind him and he moved to

the side of the road. He turned instinctively to see who it was. He
knew most everyone in the neighborhood.

The old, faded baby blue beat-up pickup looked like it was

straight out of the 1950s with its rounded edges and five windows.
The driver pulled to a stop in front of him, and Derek walked up to
the window when he rolled it down.

He recognized Ishwar instantly and emotions warred within him.

He’d missed him over the last few days and he felt glad to see him
today. He wanted to be angry or mad, but he couldn’t help but feel
happy.

“Need a lift, stranger?” Ishwar bared his bright white perfect teeth

in a broad smile, a perfect contrast against his dark skin.

Derek didn’t want to go back to the ranch and see Bo again, but he

did want to get in the truck with Ishwar. Derek hesitated for a moment
before replying, “Sure.”

Ishwar waited for him to seat-belt in before taking his foot off the

brake. “So where were you headed?”

“I don’t know. I was thinking of seeing my mom before I head out

of town.”

“You weren’t leaving on my account, were you?”
“No, it’s got nothing to do with you. I just don’t belong anywhere,

man.”

“I think you’re wrong. You got more friends than you think, but

I’ll take you wherever you want to go.” Ishwar gave him a sideways
glance. “You never talked much about your mom before. Where does
she live?”

“That’s because she’s not a normal mom. She couldn’t be there to

raise me, but she is the only family I have.”

“What happened?”
“She’s schizophrenic but didn’t want to take her meds. She had a

really bad hallucination and tried to kill me. Came at me with a

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butcher knife, and the court ordered her to confinement for not taking
her meds. So now she’s in an insane asylum.”

“I didn’t realize they made those anymore.”
“Well, they call it a hospital but still. I know what it is and it’s

why she couldn’t be a mother to me.”

“I’m sorry. Sounds like you had a rough life.”
“You don’t know the half of it.”
“You can trust me with your past and your future. I’d like to know

you better, Derek. All of you.”

“Make a right here.” Derek had not trusted anyone with that kind

of ammunition in a long time. Kids could be brutal and they martyred
him over having a crazy mother, but there was a part of him that he
wanted to share with Ishwar, a part that needed to be accepted as he
was. “She’s being held at the Morning Star State Mental Hospital.”

Ishwar nodded and followed the directions Derek gave him.

* * * *


Derek exited the vehicle and shut the door to the truck. He looked

up the hill at the expansive building. A grassy hill was dotted with
hickory trees, and the concrete pathway led to a colonial-style
redbrick building. An American flag waved alongside the Texas one.
Being here brought back old feelings of frustration and anger. He
couldn’t fix his mom, nor could he change things.

She was going to live out the rest of her days here, and there

would never be that happy family relationship between them. She
could never be the mom he wanted to depend on, to love.

It just…sucked.
Ishwar came around the old truck and met him at his side. He

touched Derek on the forearm. “You going to be okay?”

“Yeah.” Derek squeezed his hand, glad to have the emotional

support at the moment. “Let’s get this over with.”

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Derek didn’t let go of his hand the entire walk up to the hospital

or even once he got to the visitor’s desk, where he found out her room
number.

He hardly recognized her. They’d cut her hair short, just above her

shoulders, for ease of maintenance, and she wore no makeup. She
held a vacant facial expression, her eyes looking far into the distance.

How could she change so much from the mother he remembered?
“Mom?”
“Who are you?” She turned to him, and confused blue eyes

assaulted him. His chest tightened. He hadn’t known what to expect
coming here, but he’d hoped for…well, more than this.

“Your son, Derek.”
“Oh. Who’s he?” she asked, staring at Ishwar holding his hand.
“He’s my friend, Ishwar.”
His mother mumbled something unintelligible. “Indian man” was

the only phrase that Derek could understand.

Ishwar released Derek’s hand to kneel down in front of her, and

spoke in a soothing tone. “I can see you in there, hiding from the
world, but I see you and your demon.”

She gripped his golden hand in hers. “I see you too.”
It was weird watching the two of them connecting like this, but

Derek stood standing by her side.

“Can you help me?” she whispered intently to Ishwar.
“I can try. Hold still.” He kept one hand on hers and the other he

placed on her head and began chanting softly.

* * * *


“This is your home?” Ishwar couldn’t believe Derek lived this

way. Derek’s home was in a shed in the back of an old house. No
bathroom, no water or utility services of any kind. It was almost as
bad as being homeless. Only good thing about it was Derek had a roof
over his head and could get out of the rain.

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“Yeah, don’t knock it. I supported myself for the last six years.”
Ishwar had a pretty good idea though. Melissa, Derek’s mother,

had been misdiagnosed with schizophrenia, but the state hospital
didn’t believe in demonic possession. So how did they treat the
delusions and hallucinations? They medicated her until she couldn’t
function in society.

“I wasn’t trying to judge you, Derek. It could actually be kind of

nice with a few flowers and some curtains.” He flashed what he hoped
was a disarming smile.

“That would make my manly pad kind of girly, don’t you think?”
“Having plants brings you closer to nature, it doesn’t make you

girly.”

“Sure, but curtains?”
“Gives you added privacy.”
Derek shrugged.
“I don’t need it. I never bring anyone home.”
Derek went back to throwing clothes into his black backpack.

Ishwar came up from behind, wrapping his arms around his waist,
spreading his fingers to cover the expanse of his stomach muscles.

“We could have a lot more fun in here with some privacy,” Ishwar

murmured under his breath. He kissed the nape of Derek’s neck, and
he leaned into him.

“You gonna let that stop you?” Derek turned around to face him,

his hard body pressed against him. “No one will ever see. No one
comes back here to check on me.”

Ishwar was distracted when Derek wet his lips, running his pink

tongue along the tip of his teeth, and he had to make a point to move
his stare into Derek’s eyes. “We should probably get your things and
get back.”

“It’s hot in here.” Derek moved to the bed, lounging across it. “Do

you mind if I take my shirt off?” He didn’t wait for a response, but
removed it, baring a perfectly chiseled chest. A dappling of chest hair
lightly covered it. He was tanner and more muscled from the weeks

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he’d spent working the ranch. And damn it, Ishwar knew how to work
him over. He’d love to take him over his knee and give him a good
spanking. Derek tempted him more than any man should. His cock
grew hotter and harder in anticipation.

“I want to see more than your shirt come off.” Ishwar unbuttoned

his clean white shirt and watched the young man on the bed like a
predator ready to move in for the kill. “I’d love to see you naked.”

“You first.” Derek smiled back, leaning on one arm.
Ishwar sat down on a chair, pulled off his boots, and took off his

pants. He neatly folded his pants and laid his underwear on top of the
chair, taking enjoyment at dragging this moment out. His cock
flagged forward, jutting out in front of him proudly.

“God, you have a beautiful dick.” Derek scooted eagerly to the

edge of the bed.

“I didn’t know that.”
“You just needed someone to appreciate it—like me.” He stroked

it and Ishwar’s cock reacted like a hot iron. “Can I suck it?”

Ishwar’s gut twisted inside, clenched with desire and something

else. Lust, maybe? He wanted to be sucked off and so much more, but
he didn’t want to be just another night of sex in this young man’s life.
He felt from the instant he met Derek he wanted more than that.

“Go ahead.” His voice sounded deep and throaty, even to his own

ears.

Derek slid his tongue along Ishwar’s length before slipping the

mushroom-shaped head into his mouth. He closed his eyes, running
his fingers through Derek’s hair, opening himself up to the wonders
of his senses.

Derek wrapped his mouth around Ishwar’s cock like a glove,

squeezing it under his tongue, and the silky smooth wetness was pure
pleasure.

“Oh, fuck!” he gasped, his hands on the back of Derek’s head.

“That feels so fucking good. Take more in. You're terrific at giving
head.”

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Derek murmured something unintelligible, his mouth full, but

Ishwar didn’t care. He was so close to coming he had to warn Derek
or he’d be eating his cum. “I am going to come. You might want to sit
back for a minute when I blow.”

“No, let me taste you.” Derek released his death grip on his cock

for only a second, but his constant attention continued even as he
talked. “Please.”

Ishwar stopped fighting his body and let go, feeling the pressure

that had been building immediately dissipate. His cock erupted and an
orgasm ripped his body. He grunted, holding Derek’s lips close to
deep-throat his cock. The man was good. Derek may be young but he
knew what he was doing and he sucked cock like a professional. He
drank every last drop of his cum and milked him dry with his mouth.

“Thank you.” Ishwar dragged Derek up from his knees to kiss

him. He could taste himself, but he didn’t care. Derek had to know
how he felt and this seemed the best way to show him.

He undressed him fully, until they were both naked, and laid him

down on the bed. He tilted his legs up and knelt between them,
dipping down to taste his lover. “My turn.”

“I’ve never had anyone do this to me.”
“I’m surprised. You seem to like giving head.”
“Yeah, I just don’t get it.” Derek laughed, but it sounded awkward

and forced.

Ishwar caressed his body, circling his butt cheeks and holding him

close. He was willing to bet the man was afraid of loving, or being
loved. Derek sometimes was so full of himself, Ishwar could consider
him cocky, but there were other times he reminded him of a lost child
that needed to be protected.

He brought his lover to ecstasy, holding him and tasting him, but

most of all, loving him.

* * * *

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Derek wanted Ishwar in every way. He felt complete in this man’s

arms, but he felt the hard-on pinned against his side and wanted to
take advantage of it. “I want you to do something for me.”

“What’s that?”
“I want to be fucked by you. I want to feel you inside of me. Will

you do that for me?” He looked up at Ishwar hopefully. He hadn’t
expected this to happen here tonight, but he would be more than
willing to take advantage of Ishwar’s eagerness, and there was no one
he wanted to fuck him more than his Indian. Ishwar’s stone façade
didn’t change, and that made the nervous pitter-patter of Derek’s heart
increase. The fear of rejection, yet again, rearing its ugly head.

“Where do you keep the lube?” Ishwar asked.
Derek nearly laughed out loud. He suddenly rolled over and

grabbed a small, clear bottle of fluid next to the bed. He had to break
the clear plastic protection covering the tip to use it. Ishwar took it
from his hands, rubbed it along his cock, and spread it over his
fingers.

Derek got into position on all fours, allowing access to his ass.
Ishwar’s fingers slid around his head, threading through his hair

and running along his spine to pat him on the ass. His fingers caressed
each cheek and then parted them, feeling Derek’s asshole stretch
around his fingers. He entered, pushing inside with first one then two
fingers, smoothing the way with the liquid lubricant. It was cool to the
touch at first, but then the liquid warmed Derek’s skin and his
entrance.

“Relax, lover.” Oh God, he just called him his lover. Just the

sound of those words made his heart swell. Ishwar entered slowly,
until his dick was up to the hilt inside of his lover. “Oh man, you feel
so good wrapped around my cock like that.”

“Fuck me.” Derek focused on keeping his butt muscles from

clenching down, easing Ishwar’s entrance. He wanted him deep
inside, and fully up his ass.

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“Like this?” Ishwar stroked in and out, holding onto his hips and

teasing him with the tip of his dick.

“Just like that. Fuck me! Fuck me!”
“You feel so damn good wrapped around my dick. Tight and hot

and wet. I wish you could feel it from this side.” The more Ishwar
talked and complimented him, the more Derek wanted to please him.
He moved with him, angling up for each thrust, until the Indian
pulsed inside of him, his body limp against his backside and Derek’s
tight ass filled with cum.

“Come home with me, Derek.” Ishwar angled him down so they

were both on the bed; he was spooning him, his limp dick still inside
of Derek. “I don’t want to let you go now that I’ve found you again.”

“Okay.” He didn’t want to end things with Ishwar now, but the

thing between him and Bo wasn’t likely to go away. Bo was always
going to be a pain in his ass, but he didn’t care because he wasn’t
likely to change his mind anytime soon. He could avoid him for a
little while, and he did promise to help out with the Christmas dinner
with Angela. After that all bets were off. “I’m not making any
promises though, but I do have a question for you.”

“Eh, what’s that?” Ishwar brushed a kiss on his skin and nibbled

on his ear.

“What did you say to my mom while you were talking to her?” He

couldn’t understand a word since most of the chanting had been in
Ishwar’s native language. “It sounded like a prayer.”

“It was. Kind of. It was a prayer to the Great One to help her

release her demon.”

“Prayers won’t fix her.” God, if it were only so easy, but it wasn’t.

The biggest thing standing in the way of her being a normal
functioning member of society was her. “She needs to take her
medicine and then the court will release her.”

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Chapter Nine


The ranch was decked out for the Christmas party Jesse’s family

held every year for the orphans and needy children of the city. “You
look adorable.” Angela pinched Derek on his cheek. Her almond-
shaped eyes drew laugh lines as she smiled. She was pretty friendly to
Derek, treating him like he belonged here and just another family
member, not working off a debt. Derek couldn’t help liking her.

“Hey, knock it off. The other guys will see and tease me.”
Angela shook her head. “You don’t need to worry so much about

what other people think of you. You’ve got to live your life for you,
not other people, Derek. You look great, just like an official North
Pole elf.”

“That’s what the sign says.” Derek waved his thumb toward the

Winter Wonderland set up for the Boys and Girls Club. Tinsel-lined
trees and a life-size mockup of the North Pole village were set up for
the kids to look at while they waited in line to see Santa. The train
that wrapped through the trees and presents was a real crowd pleaser.

“Well, I don’t want to keep you from doing your job. I just wanted

to say thank you and tell you how cute you looked, but you don’t need
to know that. All the little girls are probably falling in love the
moment they see you.”

“Maybe after I hand them their present.” Derek rolled his eyes. He

had healed from his fights, but he was no Casanova, and he didn’t
look like Tom Cruise or Johnny Depp. Those little girls giving him
great big doe eyes were only interested in their presents he handed
them, but it still made him feel good to see their eyes light up and
their enthusiasm over such a small gesture bubble up.

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The girls’ presents were wrapped in red and the boys’ gifts were

wrapped in blue. Luke was the other cowboy lucky enough to play an
elf for Santa, and Derek didn’t mind him being here. It was Bo staring
at him from across the room that bothered him. He hadn’t said a word
to Derek since they’d begun handing out gifts this morning, but Derek
was fine with his intermittent icy glares as long as the guy left him
alone.

Bo had gotten the duty of helping to feed everyone and frying up

the turkeys for the masses of children and their parents. So he wasn’t
there all the time and spent most of his time outside in the bitter cold.

Derek wasn’t going to let Bo’s presence ruin the experience for

him. He continued to do his job and ignore the other man until he
reached the bottom of his pile of presents and the last of the kids.

Angela surprised him, taking him by the arm and ushering him

outside. “I am so proud of how hard you have worked around here.
We have a surprise for you outside. Can you come to the barn with
me?”

She opened the door and took him to the tack room. It gave him

kind of a weird feeling being alone with her like this, but it was nice
too. He trusted her, and the other people living at the ranch felt like
family. The family he never had.

“There it is.” She waved toward the tack room.
“The saddle room?” Derek looked around to see the usual leather

work saddles. One new one with golden brown leather was in the
center of the room thrown over a sawhorse. “I really don’t
understand.”

“No, silly! It’s your first saddle. Jesse had it custom made.”
“But I’m no cowboy.” Derek frowned. “I don’t even have a

horse.”

“You do now.” Ishwar led a roan mare down the hallway.
“You have the heart of a cowboy and that is what is important.”

Angela beamed.

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“I don’t know what to say.” Derek didn’t like the idea of crying in

front of his friends, and just the thought of him breaking down now
made him fight back the tears welling up in his eyes.

“A thank you might be nice.” Angela chuckled.
“Thank you!” He gave Angela a hug.
“Thank Ishwar, it was all his idea to give you your first horse.”
Derek moved to the horse and patted her nose. She had a white

star on her forehead, but most of her body was a solid reddish brown,
the color of red cedar. He had no idea how he would take care of a
horse, and if he ever moved he would have to find it a home. He
should be thinking of it as a pain in the ass, but he didn’t care. She
belonged to him now, and he would enjoy her as long as he could.

He turned and embraced Ishwar, kissing the man fully on the lips.

He had never given any public displays of affection, but this just felt
right. “Thank you so much!”

Ishwar kissed back and even when he left his embrace held his

hand in a warm but comforting grip.

“I think she likes you.” Angela laughed at the horse nuzzling

between the men for more attention.

Derek scratched her behind the ears and stroked her neck and

back. “I like her too. She’s beautiful.”

“Merry Christmas, Derek,” Ishwar said.
“I don’t usually celebrate Christmas for myself.” He remembered

all the crappy Christmases he had endured. Times he wished he had a
real family, people who loved him unconditionally, and none could
compare to today. He had friends for the first time in years and a
lover. This had to be his best Christmas ever.

“Why not? Did you not believe in Christmas?” Ishwar asked

thoughtfully.

“No, I just never belonged anywhere before.” A weight lifted off

his chest with that admission. “Never really had a family.”

“Well, this is your home now and we’ll be your family for as long

as you want us. Isn’t that right, Ishwar?”

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“Absolutely,” Ishwar agreed.
Derek had never been happier than that moment and he could

honestly say the ranch felt like home.

* * * *


Angela sensed they wanted more private time to themselves and

disappeared.

“We should probably get back inside before someone misses us.”

Derek felt odd being alone with Ishwar for the first time in weeks, and
at the same time a sense of peacefulness overcame him.

“They won’t miss us for a while. We have plenty of time before

someone would come looking. We could probably do it three or four
times before someone figured out what we were up to, unless you
want to go back now.”

Fuck going back. He’d rather fuck his friend.
“No.” There was no going back now.
Ishwar closed in on him. His hand reached for his face, cupping it

with his strong, lean fingers. Derek’s dick hardened and lengthened.
Ishwar could turn him on, turn him over, and take him right then and
there. He was putty in the man’s hands when he touched him like this.
He closed his eyes, engulfed by Ishwar’s masculine scent, his
strength.

No other man could make him feel so loved and so turned on with

just a look. Well, there was one other man, but he was a distant
dream, a one-night stand in a bar, and he never planned on seeing
Lucas again, much less fucking him.

They kissed, freeing Derek’s mind from the memories of the past.
This was real.
This was love.
Derek shed his shirt and his pants in seconds, letting them fall to

the floor in his enthusiasm. Ishwar followed suit, removing his shirt,

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but he kept his tight-fitting blue jeans on. He just opened the zipper to
unleash his giant erection.

“Did you want to break in the saddle?” Ishwar’s mouth tilted up at

the corners. The tips of his fingers drew soft circles on Derek’s thighs.

“Dunno. Riding bareback sounds kind of fun.”
“Trust me. This can be fun too.” Ishwar lifted him by his waist

onto the saddle. The hard leather felt cool beneath his ass and molded
to his backside.

“Show me.” Derek’s legs circled the other man’s waist. Their

dicks touched and his breath hissed out in pleasure.

“If you insist.” Ishwar gripped Derek under his ass and lifted his

legs over Ishwar’s shoulders to lock in place around his neck. He
pulled a bottle of lube from his pocket and opened it, spreading the oil
in an even coat across his dick.

His fingers gently pressed into Derek’s rosy pink hole and opened

him slowly to prepare him for his size.

“Just fuck me,” Derek begged. He tightened his muscles around

Ishwar’s probing fingers. And then suddenly released them. He
wanted to feel that fat dick inside of him, not pressed up against his
thigh.

“Say it again.”
“Fuck me!” He could feel the tip of Ishwar’s cock enter. He

forced himself to relax, allowing the Indian to push deeper, until he
was buried balls deep in his ass. He held his position with his legs up
over the other man’s ass, and he was sure it would be a funny sight if
anyone walked in on them.

“Give it to me!”
Ishwar was merciless in his sexual torture, moving slowly in and

out.

“Ah, you like that?” Ishwar asked in mid-thrust.
“If I could cut off your dick and keep it, I would.” Derek’s

erection burned with frustration. He cupped it with the palm of his

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hand, sliding it over the length, back and forth. “Fuck me, but that
feels so good!”

“Who feels good?”
“You do. Damn, I love this. I love you, Ishwar!”
He felt Ishwar press hard, his load being unloaded between

Derek’s butt cheeks. Ishwar unhooked Derek’s legs from behind his
neck and pulled Derek close to his body, holding him under his arms.
His lips pressed against Derek’s, tasting salty but good.

This was what it felt like to be loved. Derek wrapped his arms

tightly around Ishwar’s neck, never wanting to let him go. It didn’t
matter that Ishwar didn’t say the words back. He showed him in every
step of their lovemaking session how he felt about him and how much
he needed him. Derek could wait to hear those words.

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Chapter Ten


“I’ll meet you back inside in a few minutes, Ishwar. Just gonna

lock up.”

“Hey, I understand if you want to choose a horse over me. You

can say it,” Ishwar joked lightly, chuckling under his breath.

“I would never make that choice, but I do love my gift.” Derek

pulled him close to kiss him quickly. “I’ll be inside in just a minute.”

“All right, but don’t take too long.” Ishwar gave him a playful

squeeze on his ass before turning to leave him alone in the barn.
Derek picked up a brush and entered the stall of his new roan mare.
She was surprisingly friendly, meeting him at the gate.

“Hey girl, you sure are pretty.” He talked to her in soothing tones,

brushing her loose hair from her coat. Her shiny coat was proof that
she had been well cared for before. She was healthy, not too fat or too
skinny that you could see her ribs beneath the skin. She moved like
she was a young horse; her ears perked forward with a healthy
curiosity and she responded well to his touch. The temperature was
supposed to drop to freezing tonight and he noticed the short hair of
the horse didn’t have the insulated layer of winter hair to protect her.
“I am going to take really good care of you.”

He got a blanket and threw it over the horse. Then he locked up

for the night. One last visual check and he turned off the lights before
shutting the side entrance door and leaving.

This next year was going to be a great year for him. He was in

love with a man who treated him right, and his future looked even
better. He had a good job if Jesse would let him stick around, and a
man who loved him. His new horse could turn out to be an asset. He

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could train her, maybe even participate in a few rodeos. If she won,
her babies could be worth some money if he wanted to breed her in a
few years.

The cool night air was laced with tobacco smoke, putting Derek

on the alert. He recognized that brand of cigarette and the man who
smoked it. He hugged his jacket tighter to his body and sped up his
pace to get back to the main building and the party. It didn’t leave a
good feeling in the pit of his stomach to be out here alone.

“Hey, there!” Bo’s lazy voice called from the darkness, setting the

hairs on the back of Derek’s neck on edge. “What’s your hurry,
Derek?”

“I don’t want any trouble, Bo.” Derek paused mid-step, his eyes

locked on the space of darkness that the voice came from. The
cigarette glowed red as the man took a deep breath, but even that light
disappeared as it was tossed to the ground and squished beneath his
heel.

“What? Scared now that your boyfriend isn’t here to protect you?”
“Just leave Ishwar out of this.”
“Oh, so now you’re getting hot and heavy with the Indian?” His

laughter sounded sick and twisted. “He can’t help you either, and if
you scream for help, I’ll just kill him too.”

He must have thought he was dating the guy from the bar or

something. Little did he know that Derek had not seen Lucas since
that fateful night. “What do you want, Bo?”

“You are going to come with me so we can settle a score.”
“And if I say no?”
“Nobody will hear you scream, nobody will even know what

happened until they find your body. You owe me.”

“I don’t owe you shit.” Derek took one step backward.
“You got me fired, horse shit, and cast out by my pack.” The feral

growl carried in the night air, and Derek tried to move but couldn’t,
paralyzed by the hypnotic glow of Bo’s eyes. He felt like a trapped
animal, knowing he was about to be someone’s dinner. After his last

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run-in with Bo, Derek was through trying to fight the pecker. He
knew he’d just get his ass kicked again. The asshole’s strength was
superhuman and he could overpower Derek with little effort. “You
owe me everything.”

Derek opened his mouth to scream, but Bo was there before he

could make a sound. Bo held his hand over Derek’s mouth. “Because
I like to play with my food, I am going to give you a sporting chance.
I’ll give you till the count of ten to see how far you can run.”

Bo pushed him down to land on his hands and knees before

beginning to slowly count. Derek didn’t look back, just ran like hell.
He ran as if his life depended on it, because it did.

* * * *


Ishwar hated the feeling gnawing at his stomach. He’d been

watching the door for a while now, but Derek wasn’t anywhere to be
seen. Sure he said he’d be locking up, but a half hour had passed.

He exited the party and looked over to the barn. The lights were

off except for the security lights outside the building, making Ishwar
think something was wrong.

Ishwar scoured the area for tracks in the soft dirt. It was a full

moon and the ranch was well lit, but he never expected to find results
so quickly. There had been a struggle, and then the footsteps took off
in the opposite direction of the building, toward the distant plain. He
couldn’t see anyone or anything in the distance, but his instincts were
telling him that Derek was in trouble and needed help.

“Damn.” He called Jesse on the way to saddle his horse. This just

seemed too close to Bo’s getting fired to be a coincidence, and if he
had another run-in with Bo, he wasn’t sure he could help him.

Ishwar could ask for help another way. Being a shaman held its

advantages. He could communicate with wolves telepathically and
charm them, but there would be a price to pay.

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Magic always had a price, but tonight he would pay anything to

ensure his love lived to see another day.

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Chapter Eleven

The call came on the wind. Desperate. Images pulsed through

Lucas’s mind asking for help to search for a lost human. When a
picture of Derek’s face flashed in his mind, he knew he would have to
give aid.

It was up to Lucas whether he wanted to answer or involve the

pack, but if he helped the medicine man, he could demand a new
treaty from the Indians.

One that would give him and his kind a whole lot more respect.
He let out a long, low howl with his answer, and his pack returned

his call. He would help.

He ran at a full gallop, all four paws hitting the ground, sending

clay and sand into the air. He used his senses to help him find the
right direction. His hearing was sharper than that of a human, and his
sense of smell was five hundred times better in this canine form.

Lucas covered distances that no human could compete with in

only a few seconds. His fur parted with the wind, and as he panted his
tongue rolled to the side. He never felt as free or close to nature as
when he was in his wolf form.

He ran wild and free toward the moon, his nose in the air to catch

the scent of his lost human.

* * * *


Damn it.
Lucas found the human he was looking for battered and in a

bleeding pile of dirty rags.

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Raw, unbridled emotion hit him like a ton of bricks wrapping

around his chest.

Lucas curled his body next to Derek’s, hoping to share warmth

and comfort. The man didn’t seem to be conscious; his breathing was
shallow and labored, and Lucas was still weak from the last time he
healed him. He couldn’t do it a second time in the same moon cycle.
He could only call the man who’d asked for his aid and hope he
arrived soon enough to help. He recognized the smell of another.
Derek reeked of Bodine.

Anger flooded his veins and his fur bristled protectively while

lying there. How could he have been so stupid to leave his mate
unprotected and alone?

He had communicated to Ishwar the images of Derek’s twisted

and bloody body the moment he found it. All that was left was to wait
for the Indian to arrive.

Minutes seemed like hours and went to go on forever until he

heard the sound of approaching horse steps.

A tall Indian sat atop a black stallion. The horse was breathing

hard after running for so long, and the passenger turned pale the
moment he saw the trail of blood leading to the body Lucas sat next
to.

Lucas growled from deep in his throat, the hair bristling on the

back of his neck. He didn’t like what he was feeling from this man.
His mind shouted out one thought. One word in response.

Mine.
The Indian slid down from his horse, hands out in front of him, to

show he was no threat, but even with a weapon the man would have a
hard time competing with Lucas’s wolf side. Soft human flesh was no
match for his speed or his sharp canine teeth capable of ripping flesh
and smashing bone.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” The Indian tried to use a soothing

voice and charm him with his magic, but Lucas resisted the desire to
please him. He was the alpha wolf. It was his choice to stay or to go,

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and he would lay down the law here and now. Derek belonged to him
and him alone.

Mine.
“You can’t help him, but I can. Let me help him.” The Indian took

another step forward and stopped inches away from him.

Lucas stopped growling as he considered his options for a

moment. Stay and protect, or trust the Indian would do the right thing
and save Derek’s life. Then he could go and find the man who had
done this. His first choice was to protect the life of his lover, but if he
didn’t get some type of medical help soon, there would be no saving
him. His life force was weak, barely hanging on.

He couldn’t let him die no matter the cost.
Lucas made a decision on the spot that could have cost him his

life. He transformed in front of a human, exposing his secret and that
of his pack. Fur and fang became soft flesh and teeth; bones contorted
and muscle changed shape, shifting to another size, another form,
another shape.

He stood naked before the Indian, waiting for judgment. Lucas

was surprised to see fascination whirl in the Indian’s eyes and not
fear. Ishwar mouthed the word “Wendigo,” and that one word told
him the Indian knew his kind from ancient legends.

He stood before him in all his naked glory, not even attempting to

hide his nudity. “This human belongs to me.”

“Whoa, I appreciate your help, but that’s my boyfriend you’re

talking about.”

“Derek is mine.” He wouldn’t give on that point. Derek was

meant for him. The call of his mate was impossible to resist; it was a
call he had to answer.

“Let me help him.” The Indian glanced around Lucas’s body to

Derek lying in the dirt behind him.

“You can’t get him to a hospital fast enough to help him.”
“I have to try,” Ishwar pleaded with him.

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“If you want to help, then trust me.” Lucas held out his hand for

the Indian man to take. As much as Lucas didn’t like binding his spirit
to anyone else, he needed help to heal Derek and the only option was
the man in front of him. “I can heal him, with your help.”

“What do you want from me?”
“Come here and hold onto my hands. I cannot heal him twice in

one lunar cycle, but I can do the healing if I take part of your
essence.”

“My soul? Is this dangerous?”
“I won’t lie, it can be. This act will bind the three of us together.

Forever. Now make up your mind, human. If you want to save him
you will follow my command.” Lucas had to give him the choice.
Stealing a soul could be a curse forever burdening his heart and love,
but if given freely it would also make the healing go easier.

The man took his hands tentatively and Lucas grasped them

firmly in his hands, reaching into him with his spirit, touching the
core of him. The life force within the man was powerful, but he could
not take too much of it away or the Indian could die trying to save the
other one. It was a balancing act. Lucas had to capture the life force
and unravel it, sometimes by a single strand at a time, to wrap around
Derek’s broken body.

Lucas began chanting a healing prayer in the old language, and he

heard the Indian—no, Ishwar—say the words in his mind
simultaneously. He knew Ishwar’s name from his thoughts. Their
minds met and his thoughts were open to him, and at the same time he
realized Ishwar knew everything about him now.

Everything about who and what he was. His past and his present.
He took that into himself. He gave something of himself.
Shit.
Everything.

* * * *

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Derek couldn’t believe his eyes. The most gorgeous naked man

stood over him with his friend and lover, Ishwar. They were saying
something softly over and over again. He would swear it was a dream
if not for the pain. His entire body ached and a mind-numbing pain
paralyzed him when he tried to move, but something seemed to be
helping to ease it.

His mind cleared as the pain ebbed away from his body, and

through the haze in his mind he recognized that beautiful face of the
naked man. It was his one-night stand from the bar, Lucas. He thought
he’d never see him again, but seeing him now was a welcome sight.

Lucas bent down close to his body, his long hair wisped around

his face by the light breeze, and he spoke to him.

“Do you know the man who did this to you?”
Derek swallowed and nodded. Bo didn’t think he left him alive.
“Was it Bo? The man from the bar? I smell him all over you.”

When Derek hesitated, Lucas’s eyes turned stormy and his voice
dangerous. “Don’t lie to me to protect him. His scent cloaks you like
you bathed in it.”

“Bo.” Derek’s throat was still raw from the freshly healed slash

and the word exited his lips as a whisper, but it was the confirmation
that Lucas had been waiting for.

His jaw clenched and a vein throbbed at the base of his neck. “I

have to hunt down the man who did this.”

“But what about Derek?”
“He should be healthy enough for the ride home.” Lucas looked

irritable. “I’ll be back.”

Lucas’s body seemed to shimmer, and then the miracle happened.

His body contorted from an upright man into a wolf. Hair suddenly
grew, his face lengthened, hands became paws with padded feet and
claws meant for speed. Where there was naked flesh before, now
there was suddenly fangs and fur, in the form of a beautiful black
wolf. His stunning brown eyes flashed anger and human emotions.
His lips curled to expose the sharp white points. As a human he was

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dangerous. As a wolf, he was powerful, and the energy that
surrounded him was potentially lethal. He was very much a wild
animal.

Something inside of Derek said he should find this fact disturbing.

It wasn’t natural to shift forms, but it seemed natural to accept him in
whatever form he appeared. A shape-shifting wolf was just as sexy as
the man.

Besides, this was just a dream—albeit a very weird dream, but

still just a dream.

In reality, Lucas had not just turned into a wolf and run off into

the brush, and Ishwar was not trying to heave Derek over his shoulder
to get him on the horse.

Derek just had his throat ripped out by a shape-shifting wolf, and

then he was miraculously healed. Lucas, one of the guys he least
expected to ever see again, just ran off after Bo. How could this
possibly be real?

It couldn’t be real, just some fucking nightmare.

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Chapter Twelve


Lucas had killed Bo in cold blood.
Ishwar was horrified. He watched the entire thing as if it were

through his own eyes. Lucas hunted Bo down and killed him, ripping
him to shreds in the fight. Fur flew in the wind, blood drained into the
ground, and barely anything was left from Bo in his wolf form.

Something had happened when Ishwar helped Lucas to heal

Derek. He could connect with animals before this, but now it was as if
he were linked with Lucas’s mind on a deeper level. He couldn’t
block the other man’s thoughts and he sensed it was the same for
Lucas.

This was not a good thing and he didn’t like it one bit. The man he

was connected with was a Wendigo, a shape-shifting wolf and
capable of extreme violence. He was the enemy and he was now
bound to him, mind, body, and soul.

This compromised his loyalties. What would his tribe do when

they found out what he had done? That he had made a personal pact
with one of the Wendigo? The same creatures he had sworn to help
his people hunt down, he was now a part of, and this connection was
irreversible.

Derek sat in front of the stone fireplace at the bunkhouse,

warming himself with the heat of the crackling fire. Physically he was
healthy. It was an amazing transformation that took place and Ishwar
wouldn’t have believed it if he hadn’t seen it for himself. However,
his mental state was another matter altogether and not so easily fixed.

“You okay? You’ve been awfully quiet.”
“I am just thinking.”

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“Do you want to talk about it?”
“I am not sure. I thought it was a dream, but I am not so sure

anymore. Did I almost die?” Derek asked.

“Yes. Lucas saved you though.”
“So, I did see him?”
“I didn’t think you were awake for that. What did you see?”
“It was weird. He was naked, standing over me—and then—and

then…he changed.”

“Into a wolf?” Ishwar asked.
“Yes.” Derek blinked, shocked Ishwar already knew what he was

about to say.

“That wasn’t a dream.”
“I don’t understand. How is that even possible?”
“I think I should let him explain what he is.”
“But he’s not here.”
“He is on his way now.” Ishwar forced himself to relax his

clenched jaw, hoping Derek didn’t notice his annoyance. He
disagreed with Lucas’s actions even if he understood why Lucas felt it
was necessary. If it were a choice between Derek and Bo, he would
have chosen Derek too, but Lucas had not chosen to turn him over to
the cops for questioning or to be charged for assault or attempted
murder. No, it had happened to be one of his people, so he considered
himself law above all else. He was judge, jury, and executioner. “He
had to take care of some…business first.”

“There’s something you aren’t telling me, isn’t there?”
“Yes, but Lucas will make everything clear when he comes back.”

* * * *


Derek opened the front door to see Lucas fully clothed, wet with

rain and blood. Dirt caked his hair and he was soaked clear to the
bone. The rain explained the wet, dripping hair and clothes, but what
explained the blood? Was it his blood from earlier tonight? God, it

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was intensely shocking seeing him this way. He felt as if a bucket of
ice water had been poured over him, and yet he felt that magnetic
attraction as strong as the first day he met the man in the bar.

“What happened to you?”
“I’d rather not talk about it here, but once we get back to my

house I will be happy to explain everything,” Lucas gritted out.

“He’s not going anywhere without me.” Ishwar stepped forward,

arms crossed defensively.

“Then you can come too. I need a shower, but I’m not making the

same mistake and leaving Derek alone again.”

“I am not going anywhere until someone explains what is going

on here.” Derek looked from one man to the other, searching both
their faces for answers.

“Then do you mind if I take a shower before we talk? I really need

to get cleaned up.” Lucas ran his fingers through his hair in
frustration.

“Sure,” Ishwar said.
Lucas walked by him into the bunkhouse and Derek followed him

into the group bathroom. Being in his presence was intense. The man
seemed larger than an ordinary man, taking up much of the room. His
six-foot frame dominated those around him, dwarfing the other two
men. Luckily, it was late enough that all the workers were in bed and
asleep.

Ishwar was sexy in a guy-next-door kind of way, but Lucas took

sexy to the next level. His flawless skin and dark hair were model
quality. All it took was a look from him to get Derek aroused, and he
seemed so cocksure of himself. Lucas could have him naked and
panting in his bed without asking.

No matter what he did or said, Derek knew he’d end up in bed

with him. He couldn’t say no and he didn’t want to. But that didn’t
stop him from wanting to understand just what the hell was going on
here.

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Lucas led the way to the bathroom without a question as to where

it was. He proceeded to disrobe and left a pile of his clothes on the
bathroom tile floor, totally at ease with his nudity in front of Derek
and Ishwar.

“I am sorry, but did I miss something? Have you been here

before?” Derek thought this was his first time here, but he walked
around like he owned the place and as if he knew where everything
was already.

It was weird.
“No.” Lucas’s tone was patient, but his brooding steel-blue eyes

shared his compassion. “Just save your questions, Chayak.”

“The name’s Derek.” Derek walked very close to him. He wasn’t

afraid of Lucas and he couldn’t allow him to intimidate him.

He could feel the steam of the shower as he watched the droplets

of water roll off Lucas’s chest. It was hypnotic, but he wouldn’t give
in. He needed to know what the fuck was going on and he was tired of
everyone around him treating him like some kind of child. Ishwar
stood off to the side, but he seemed unaffected by the other man. They
weren’t protecting him by keeping him in the dark, and from the looks
of things and the blood washing down the drain, being in the dark was
a dangerous thing.

His heartbeat raced in his chest and his legs threatened to bolt, but

he stood his ground.

“I know your name.” Lucas ran his hand through his hair, pushing

it back away from his face. His eyes went up, looking toward the
heavens. “Chayak is a term my people use for…an endearment.”

“The closest thing it can come close to in English is something

like ‘love of my life,’” Ishwar intervened, arms folded across his
chest, watching the two of them intently.

“Ch-ay-ak?” Derek rolled it over his tongue slowly, trying to

understand the deeper meaning of what Ishwar said. Whoa. That only
made thirty more questions come to mind. Why would he call him
that? Sure, they had one night of mind-blowing sex together, but

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certainly it wasn’t that great for Lucas? He had to get it all the time
with his good looks and the women throwing themselves at him all
the time. Men envied him and those who didn’t want to be him
wanted to be with him. He wasn’t lacking for possible lovers. “That
just seems totally wrong for what I am to you. Didn’t you say it would
only be one time?”

“Chayak, I haven’t been honest with you.” Lucas walked to Derek

and touched Derek’s face, cradling his jaw in his hand, his thumb
caressing his jawline. “You have to know that this carnal attraction
between us is something much more than lust. It’s stronger—much
more powerful.”

Derek backed up against the tile, Lucas’s strong arms caging him.

His air came in ragged, short breaths and he felt the other man’s
hardness through his wet clothes. His desire rode high on his thigh.
He was inches from the other man’s lips, aching to be kissed, to be
fucked. God, he wanted to taste him right now, to have him inside of
him again. The desire was impossible to fight, even knowing Ishwar
was to his right watching him cave to his desires.

“You need me as much as I need you, Chayak, because you and I

were meant to be together. You belong to me.”

It felt so good to hear those words, but he should be fighting this

attraction, shouldn’t he? There was some reason, but he couldn’t
fucking think straight staring into those adoring eyes. Damn, there
was Ishwar right behind him. Oh yeah. “I have a boyfriend.”

“Ishwar doesn’t mind, do you?” Lucas gave a half grin and turned

to Ishwar, grinding against Derek. “In fact when I do this, he feels
every bit as much pleasure as I do. Don’t you, Ishwar?”

Ishwar didn’t answer, but Derek saw his body tremble.
“How is that possible?” Derek asked.
“I had no choice.” Ishwar said. “You were very near death last

night and Lucas bound our spirits together in order to heal you. I can
hear his thoughts and he can hear mine. Some things that are
especially strong, like when he is with his mate, I can feel.”

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“His mate?”
“You, Derek, are his mate.” Ishwar’s voice was raw, and an

octave deeper than normal.

“The Wendigo don’t choose who we are bound to, except in

Ishwar’s case. We live our lives just waiting to find our soul mate. I
came here to find you, Chayak, and now that I’ve found you I can’t
let you go. I’d lay down my life for you.” His lips crashed down on
Derek’s, transferring his need and hunger. Derek’s gut tightened and
his cock hardened. “I’d do anything for your pleasure.”

Lucas undressed him slowly, tossing his wet clothes to the side.

The shower pelted him with warm water, massaging his back. Lucas
kissed his way down Derek’s body and covered his dick with his
mouth, sucking him off, and Derek came quickly. Lucas swallowed.

There was nothing hotter than having a man wrap his lips around

your cock and suck until you came. Except maybe having two men
pleasure you simultaneously. He didn’t want Ishwar to feel left out,
especially if he could feel it every time they made love.

“Ishwar, I need you,” Derek called to his friend and lover.
Lucas growled, “You ask too much, Chayak.”
“I love him too,” Lucas said. “You can’t ask me to just let him

go.”

“It’s all right.” Ishwar strode toward him, entering the water

without a thought of his clothes. “This is about you and Lucas now.
There will be times when we all will be together, but now is the time
for you two. Not me.”

Derek kissed him quickly, but Lucas pulled him back into his

arms.

Lucas eased him down to the tile floor and helped him to all fours.

Lucas entered him from behind, pushing into his tight ass. Derek was
amazed he took Lucas inside so easily. It was like he was made for
the other man. Just being in his presence fueled his voracious appetite
for sex. He could do this all night long and still feel like he had done
nothing to quench his desire.

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“Fuck me hard!”
“You like it that way, don’t you.” Lucas glided in and out of him.
“Fuck. Me.” It felt so good.
He knew he would have Ishwar in many ways before the night

was through, but he could still help ease his painful erection pushing
against his wet jeans. His mouth watered, longing to be filled.

“Ishwar, I can take you in my mouth.”
Ishwar bent to kiss him. “Your offer is sweet, but I can wait my

turn.”

“You need some relief—let me help you. I want to taste you.”
“If you insist.” Ishwar unbuckled his pants and slid them over his

boots. His boxers quickly followed. Ishwar knelt in front of him and
placed his hands on Derek’s shoulders to steady himself. His long
cock found Derek’s mouth with deadly accuracy. His fat cock filled
Derek’s mouth and Derek sucked in the same tempo as he was being
fucked.

His tight ass filled with cum and his mouth not long after.
Lucas turned off the water and they dried each other off. Each of

them wrapped a towel around their waist before walking to Ishwar’s
room to finish their lovemaking session.

Derek came four more times that night, until he didn’t feel he had

any more seed to give. He was happy just being held by the men he
loved. Lucas stroked his hair, twirling it between two fingers.

“I will arrange for your things to be moved to my home

tomorrow.”

“I can’t just move. I have a job.” Derek couldn’t believe what he

was hearing.

“I will arrange everything. You can continue to work from my

home, but there really is no need to work at all. You will not lack for
money.”

“It’s not just that. What about Ishwar?”
“He can come too.”

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“I owe Jesse money for my bail and I still have to go to court.

What if I go to jail?”

“I’ll wait for you.”
“Me too.” Ishwar said.
“I can repay your debt for you if you like.”
“I feel like I should be paying my own debt, which is why I’m

working.”

“Chayak, it’s my job to take care of you. Protect you. Let me do

my job.”

That line he added to the end made Derek suddenly remember the

blood covering Lucas earlier tonight. “Is that why you were all
bloody? Protecting me?”

“Yes,” Ishwar answered.
“No, not entirely. That was another part of my job. I have to keep

my people in line, and Bo was not living by our laws.”

“What did you do to Bo?”
“He was warned.” Lucas’s brow knitted with frustration.
“He had to kill him, Derek. Bo was the one who tried to kill you.

In the condition he left you in, I am not sure how you were able to
survive, and if it wasn’t for Lucas, you wouldn’t be here.”

A hazy memory of pain and blood visited him. He remembered

fangs and fur, biting through flesh. A wolf that attacked and a wolf
that protected and then there was the man. The naked man standing
over him who transformed back to a wolf. “I thought it was all a
dream.”

“It was no dream,” Ishwar responded.
“I will always protect my life mate and my clan. You are my

family now.” Lucas cradled Derek head in his hand.

“But couldn’t you have handed him over to the police? I didn’t

like him, but killing seems to be a pretty harsh punishment.”

“He lived by my laws as one of the Wendigo. When he chose to

ignore the warnings, he chose the consequences.”

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“Tribal laws are separate from the rest of the world, and the

Wendigo are the same way. If one of their people exposes them to the
world, the punishment is death, Derek. If Lucas had not carried out
the act, another man would have had to step up and take his place. It’s
tradition.”

“Ishwar is right, but I’m not just any Wendigo, I’m the alpha. That

means I have certain responsibilities to my pack.” Lucas’s long lashes
covered his blue eyes.

“Just like I have certain responsibilities to my tribe,” Ishwar

interrupted. “They will have to know what happened tonight, Lucas.”

“I don’t even know what to say. This seems like a lot to take in

right now.” Derek confessed.

“Say you’ll let me love you. Tell me you will become part of my

family. My forever family.”

It truly felt like home and now he knew what it felt like to be

loved.

“I want to say yes.” Derek admitted.
“Then just say yes, Derek. I want you to be by my side for the rest

of my life.”

“You will be coming too, Ishwar?”
“Yeah. I wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else.”
“Then yes!” Derek laughed and rolled excitedly into Lucas’s

arms. “Yes! Yes! I love you both too much to say anything else.”

The men made love two more times that night before collapsing in

a pile of naked flesh. After such vigorous lovemaking, Derek’s
muscles lacked the energy to do anything more than rest. His body
relaxed on the bed to recover. Lucas threw an arm over his chest, and
Derek used Ishwar’s arm as a pillow. Held by his lovers, he relaxed
enough for a languorous stretch and gave into his urges to fall into a
deep but happy sleep.

Being loved and having a family made him feel whole.

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THE END

WWW.MISSYLYONS.COM

 

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR



Missy Lyons has been writing since childhood, but took a break to have kids
and get married. However, she never lost her love of storytelling. Since her
first book was published in 2007 she has written several novels and many
more short stories. She’s always coming up with new ideas to write about
but hopes she chooses subjects that are emotionally compelling to her
readers.

She currently resides in Nashville, Tennessee, with her family and a
menagerie of animals. Her days are not even close as exciting to the steamy
stories she writes, but still fulfilling nonetheless. She also freelances as a
graphic design artist. She’s an active member of Romance Writers of
America and her local chapter of Music City Romance Writers. She enjoys
hearing from her fellow authors and readers alike, so feel free to contact her
by her website.

Also by Missy Lyons and Cherie Denis

Cowboys Don’t Dance

Available at

BOOKSTRAND.COM

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Siren Publishing, Inc.

www.SirenPublishing.com


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