Hiding in Plain Sight (Safe Harbor)

Safe Harbor 2: Hiding in Plain Sight
Copyright © February 2014 by Cassandra Carr
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eISBN 9781623006914
Editor: Ann M. Curtis
Cover Artist: Mina Carter
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Chapter One

What. The. Fuck.
Joe Bufford stared at the man standing just inside the door of his favorite gay sports bar. To be

fair, it was the only gay sports bar in Pittsburgh. The guy stopped after his first step inside. He was
breathtakingly beautiful. But that wasn’t what held Joe’s attention at the moment. Joe was on guard as
soon as he took in the man’s fists clenched at his sides and feet braced shoulder-width apart. He knew
this man.

If he’s here looking for a fight, we can give it to him.
Sal, the bartender, also must’ve noticed him, if the suddenly fierce expression that appeared was

anything to go by. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I…I…”
Joe continued to stare as the man licked his lips.
“If you’re here looking for someone to bash, you’re in the wrong place,” Sal said, flexing his

Popeye-like biceps.

Joe couldn’t hold in the snort. It may be stereotypical, but Sal was right. Not very many of the

queens, twinks, and other more feminine classifications for gay men came in here. The man looked
over at him, and Joe frowned. His eyes showed pure terror. Joe had seen it enough on deployment to
understand what abject fear looked like.

The man turned and abruptly left, and Joe was off his bar stool and following him before his

brain could even process the movement, which was something, given his high-level military training.
Like Sal, he knew the man. Vladimir Gusev. Everyone knew who he was—everyone who was a fan of
hockey, anyway. He’d used a gay slur against an American player in the Olympics a year ago, and
when he’d returned to the Pittsburgh Phantoms, the NHL team he played for, he’d heard plenty about
it from the crowd, both for and against him. Now Joe wanted to know what he was doing in a gay bar,
especially since there was no way he’d misinterpreted the haunted, petrified look he’d caught a
glimpse of in the man’s eyes earlier.

“Hey, hold up.” A recently retired—that was the nice name for what had been done—Delta Force

guy and a professional athlete were pretty well matched in terms of fitness, but the Russian had a few
years on Joe’s twenty-eight. If Joe remembered correctly, Vladimir was twenty-four or twenty-five.
Even though Joe called out to him, the guy didn’t pause. “Seriously, man, I’m not gonna hurt you. I
just want to talk. I’ll keep my hands where you can see them the whole time. I promise. Just stop.”

Vladimir slowed before spinning to face Joe. “What do you want?”
His lips were curled into a snarl. A man without Joe’s background probably would’ve backed off,

but Joe wasn’t intimidated.

He was surprised at how well the man spoke English, but he recalled Vladimir had come over to

the US for training when he was a teenager. At this point, he’d probably been living here for ten years
or so—Joe remembered reading about how Vladimir had just finished up his entry-level contract and
been re-signed to a long-term deal, even though he’d only been twenty-three at the time. That was
before the Olympics nearly a year ago, so Vladimir must be twenty-four or so by now.

Joe came to a stop and, as he’d promised, put his hands out in front of him. He spoke in the same

calm, clear voice he’d used to calm down women and children in Afghanistan. “I’d like to know why
you went into Reggie’s.”

Alert for any sign of violence from the guy, Joe watched as myriad emotions flitted across his

face.  They  were  still  several  feet  away  from  each  other,  but  Joe  could  plainly  detect  the  most
dominant  one—near  panic.  Vladimir’s  mouth  was  opening  and  closing  like  a  fish’s,  and  Joe  took  a
leap  of  faith  based  on  a  gut  instinct,  hoping  he  wasn’t  about  to  get  jumped.  Of  course,  if  he  was,
Vladimir better hope he got the first punch in, because that’d be all he got. You could push a man out
of Delta Force, but you couldn’t push Delta Force out of the man.

“You’re gay.”
Vladimir stared at him but said nothing. Between the open lapels of his jacket, Joe saw the man’s

Adam’s apple move up and down a couple of times. Despite the downright freezing day in late January
in Pittsburgh, a bead of sweat rolled down the side of his face. Yeah, this guy was hiding something.

Joe tried again. “It’s okay to be gay. I’m gay, everyone in Reggie’s is gay, pretty much everyone

in this entire district is gay,” he said, motioning around them, and for a brief second, Vladimir’s eyes
shifted to their surroundings before returning to him. “It’s really okay.” Joe knew it wasn’t uncommon
for gays to use homophobic slurs to take the focus off themselves. He couldn’t imagine it was easy to
be a gay man in professional sports, especially if they were anything like the military. “It’s really
okay,” he repeated, and Vladimir’s battle stance relaxed a little.

“It is not okay.” The words were laced with venom.
Joe tilted his head, trying his best to look nonthreatening to keep the guy talking. “Why?”
“Because I am Russian and a hockey player.”
The guy hadn’t exactly outed himself with his last few statements, but he’d come pretty damn

close. “We’ll deal with all that in a minute. Can you tell me why you called that player a fag in the
Olympics? I mean, if you’re gay, why would you?”

Vladimir’s head dropped, and he stared at the ground, toeing it with his sneaker. It took several

minutes, but Joe waited him out. Vlad lowered his arms to his sides, met his gaze, and seemed to make
a decision.

“They made me,” Vlad said with the same fierce, almost defiant tone.
He crossed his arms across his broad chest, and Joe had to fight to keep his brain on task and not

let the little head dictate where his thoughts went. Man, the guy was just his type.

“Who?”
“My coach and the team manager.” Vladimir shrugged and looked away.
Joe was stunned. “Why would they want you to?”
He looked at Joe like he had three heads. “To disrupt the game. We were losing.”
“But you were about to go on a power play.”
“Yes, three goals down. They wanted to get the Americans off their game.”
Joe nodded. In a sick, twisted way, it made perfect sense. He’d certainly seen far less ethical

methods used to get to the enemy. “Why did you agree to it?”

Again Vladimir threw a confused glare at Joe. “Because no one knows about me, so I could not

say I wouldn’t do it because I was gay. No one knows, and I don’t want anyone to. Also, because if I
hadn’t, they would’ve hurt my family.”

This was a lot of information to take in. “Hurt your family how?” He held up his hand. “Don’t

answer. Let’s take this conversation off the street. Would you follow me to another sports bar? A
‘straight’”—Joe used finger quotes—“bar? We can talk better there and have some privacy. You
won’t look out of place.”

Vladimir’s eyebrows drew down. “Why would you want to go to a straight bar if you are gay?”

Joe suppressed a sigh. He hoped Vladimir wasn’t a hetero-hater. Those guys annoyed the hell out

of him. In his opinion, they were no better than homophobes. “I have nothing against straight people.
Some of my best friends are straight. I just prefer sometimes to go to a place like Reggie’s where I can
truly be me. Put my arm around my date, rest my hand on his knee. And I like to do those things where
it’s not gonna get me bashed. Though not all straight people are homophobes.” Damn, he was
babbling. “Anyway, I’m parked just down there. Do you know where the Strike Zone is?”

Vladimir nodded.
“Good. Meet me there, and we’ll talk.” When one thick eyebrow went up, Joe mirrored him and

said, “Just talk. Like I said, it’s a straight bar.” Vladimir gave him an assessing look, and Joe held his
gaze.

“I will meet you there.”
Joe nodded and began to walk to his Jeep, keeping his guard up. The survival instinct that had

served him so well overseas was still active. When he reached his car, he glanced around. Vladimir
was climbing into a Navigator ahead of him. Figured.

Joe unlocked the door to his beat-up Cherokee. He hadn’t bothered to keep a car while he’d been

deployed, and now that he was back and retired, he wanted to buy something nicer than this Jeep, but
his job at the airport pulling parts for the mechanics made saving for one a slow go. He’d been
thinking about going to college, since he could do so on Uncle Sam’s dime, but he didn’t have the first
clue what kind of career would fulfill him. For now the job at the airport used the skills he’d learned
in the military. He’d been his unit’s fix-it man. It hadn’t been an official role, but whenever anything
mechanical had broken down, they’d brought it to him.

He started the car and drove the few miles to the Strike Zone, calling Sal on the way to tell him

everything was okay and he’d settle his bar tab the next time he was in, declining to give more details.
Joe wasn’t in the business of outing anyone.

When Joe arrived at the bar, Vladimir was standing next to his car, shifting from foot to foot.

Apparently the right one was made out of lead, since he’d obviously beaten Joe by enough time to turn
off his car, get out, and stand there to wait for Joe’s ass. Joe exited his own car and approached him.
“You’re safe here. These guys know me. I’ve been coming here for five or six years now, whenever
I’m in town.”

He turned and led the way into the bar. Vladimir followed behind him, and Joe began to wonder if

this was going to be a night of one-sided conversation. He led Vladimir to a booth off to the side. They
ordered beers, and Joe sat back. Vladimir fidgeted, and Joe decided he’d better start talking again and
hope for the best.

“So have you told anybody?”
Vladimir’s head whipped up, and Joe winced. Obviously the guy had lightning-quick reflexes, but

the motion still had to hurt.

“What do you mean?”
“About you being…”
“No!”
“There’s no one in your life you can tell? Not your parents, brothers, sisters? Friends? A

teammate?”

“My family would not approve. My friends are also my teammates, since I don’t go back to

Russia often. Even with the whole thing at the Olympics and all that has happened since, not everyone
in the NHL welcomes homosexuals with open arms. It is hard to know which teammates would not be

bothered by it and which would.”

Joe understood. The military was exactly the same way. He nodded. “You speak excellent

English.”

Vladimir’s brows shot up. “They, um, they put promising players in English classes very young

in Russia, so we can communicate when we come over here to play.”

“Ah.” The server dropped off their beers, and they waved away menus. “So you’ve never, ever

told anyone?”

“No, never.” Vladimir shook his head, his mouth curled into a sneer. “I didn’t even accept myself

until after I got kicked off the Olympic team. I would not believe it of myself.”

Joe remained silent, hoping Vladimir would keep talking. He did, though he was now playing

with the condensation on the side of his beer glass and not meeting Joe’s gaze.

“I kept trying with girls, but I couldn’t even get or keep an erection, and even when I…”

Vladimir stopped talking and bit his lip. “When I…you know…”

“Jerked off?”
Vladimir cleared his throat. “Yes. Even then I couldn’t. I didn’t know what I really wanted. Or

didn’t admit it to myself.”

“Haven’t you ever been attracted to one of your teammates? I mean, you’re around fit, naked men

all the time.”

The same horrified expression from earlier made an appearance. “No.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know. I’m just not.”
Joe nodded. He was familiar with the feeling. “Up until a short time ago, you were probably so

deep in the closet, you didn’t even consider it.”

“I don’t know,” he repeated. “I do not want to think about that.”
“Have you ever been attracted to a man? Any man?” Vladimir pressed his lips together.

“Vladimir, you need to talk to someone about it, and you might as well start with me. At least you
know I won’t judge you.”

Finally Vladimir asked, “How do I know I can trust you?”
Joe shrugged. “You don’t, really, except I give you my word. I don’t take stuff like this casually.

I know how hard it can be to live in the world as a gay man.”

Vladimir nodded and blew out a breath. “I guess I have been attracted. Sort of.”
“What does that mean?” Joe asked.
Vladimir answered him with an impatient huff, charming the hell out of Joe. He fought a smile.
“I have sort of been attracted to men.” Vlad shifted, his face turning red.
Joe’s head was spinning. “How can you be sort of attracted?”
Vladimir’s face flushed with red. “Gay porn.”
“Excuse me?”
“I am attracted to the men in gay porn. And since they are on a screen and I will never meet them,

yes, sort of attracted.”

“So you’ve discovered gay porn?”
Vladimir gave a humorless laugh. “Oh yes. I watch it all the time. I’m afraid one of my

teammates will catch me, though, so I try not to when we are on the road. That’s how I finally figured

out how to have an orgasm when I am alone. I thought about the scenes in the movies.”

Joe was glad Vladimir was finally starting to unwind. His forearms were now leaning on the

table, and while he still played with his glass, he was no longer trying to hide behind it. His shoulders,
which had been scrunched up practically to his ears, were beginning to relax, and the little lines on his
face were disappearing. Joe signaled for two more beers. He was only about a third through his, but
Vladimir was nearly finished. They still had a lot to talk about, a lot for Joe to piece together.

Vladimir rose, and Joe feared he was bolting. He glanced around.
“Bathroom?”
A heavy sense of relief that the guy wasn’t running away flooded Joe. What the hell? Joe jerked

his thumb toward the back of the place, but words eluded him as his mouth went dry as the Sahara
when he got a good look at Vladimir’s ass. His dick woke up in a hurry. The back view was
outstanding.

Joe attempted to discreetly adjust himself in his now way-too-fucking-tight jeans. He only wore

them to Reggie’s or another gay hangout, knowing they made his dick and ass look good. An old fuck
buddy had clued him in on that little gem. But he wasn’t used to the more constricting fit, and things
were getting pretty freaking uncomfortable down there.

He waited for Vladimir to return to the table. What were we talking about? The thread of the

conversation had completely flown from his mind when he’d spotted that delicious bubble butt. Joe
frowned. He wasn’t so old he should be having memory lapses, even though sometimes it felt like he
was, given the way his body ached from old injuries. Joe ran his right thumb over the back of his left
hand. And newer ones.

Vladimir slid back into the booth. Joe looked up.
“What?”
Joe startled. “Huh?”
“You are looking at me funny.”
Fuck.
“Nothing. I just—” He looked away for a second before facing Vladimir again. How to explain

that he was staring at the guy’s full lips and wondering what they’d feel like wrapped around his cock?
To go with those lips made for sin and a set of ice-blue eyes, Vladimir had dark blond, spiky hair
along with chiseled cheekbones and jaw. He reminded Joe of Iceman in his favorite movie, Top Gun ,
but was way hotter. Joe shook his head briefly to clear it. “What were we talking about?”

“It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does. I understand all this stuff. I’ve been through a lot of it, and you need someone to

talk to.” He closed his eyes. I shouldn’t ask. I shouldn’t ask . Forcing them open, he bit the bullet, so to
speak. “I assume you’ve never been with a man?”

Vladimir’s eyes widened. “No.”
“Not even kissed?” Oh yeah, his cock was very interested in this conversation. The thought of

being Vlad’s first nearly had Joe passing out as the blood flow headed south at the speed of a freight
train.

“No.”
“Shit.”
“Why are you upset about that?”
Vladimir tilted his head, assessing him, and Joe fell back on his years of military training and

schooled his expression into a friendly smile. He didn’t want to scare the hell out of the kid.

“It’s just a shame. A good-looking guy like you?”
Vladimir smiled for the first time, and Joe gripped the edge of the table to stop himself from

reaching out and caressing the man’s face. His smile transformed him completely. Whereas he’d had
an austere look before, now his face appeared younger, more boyish. Both were sexy as fuck, and Joe
wanted to get to know the different sides of the man sitting across the table. The desire scared the hell
out of him.

At this stage in his life, he didn’t have the patience to deal with a closet case, especially not one

with the baggage this guy carried on his broad shoulders.

“You think I am good-looking?”
Joe’s teeth clacked together. “How could I not? I’m a gay man, and I have a pulse.”
Another flush spread through Vladimir’s face. “No one has ever told me that.” He shook his head.

“Well, not true. No one ever said it who really meant it. Girls would when they wanted to have sex
with me.”

“Did you ever…finish with a girl?” Joe tried not to shudder at the image.
“Yeah, a couple of times. And I did other stuff, so they’d be happy.”
He made a face, and Joe had to concentrate to keep a laugh inside. “I’m sorry.”
Vladimir frowned. “Why?”
“Because no one should have to live like that. I did, and it sucked. I’m ex-military. Are you

familiar with ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’?” Vladimir nodded. “It was repealed.” At Vladimir’s confused
look, Joe said, “They did away with it. But even so, my military buddies weren’t exactly gonna go to a
gay sports bar with me to watch a football game or offer to stand up with me at a gay marriage
ceremony. Yeah, not hardly. So while I was in the army, I played at being straight.”

“What about now?”
“You mean am I out now?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t advertise my sexuality, but if asked a direct question, I don’t lie. It’s no one’s business,

and since I’m not in the army anymore, I can be myself without worrying about getting kicked out.”

“Can I ask a question?”
Joe raised an eyebrow. “Sure.”
“What’s with your left hand?”
Flexing said offending appendage and realizing he’d been unconsciously rubbing it, Joe said,

“Ah, yes, the reason I’m ex-military.”

“You don’t have to talk about it,” Vladimir rushed to say.
Joe waved him off. “It’s fine. During a mission, I took a fall and kinda landed on my neck and

spine.”

Vladimir gasped. “Holy shit.”
With a smile Joe knew probably looked more like a grimace, he said, “Yeah. When everything

healed, there was leftover nerve damage and scar tissue, both of which cause me to lose strength in my
hand sometimes. I also have some numbness and tingling. It’s not so bad, except when I’m tired or
stressed.”

“But if it’s not that bad—”
“I was Special Forces—you know, the baddest of the badasses. They invented tired and stressed.

Basically, I couldn’t do my job anymore.”

“Oh.”
Joe didn’t want to bring the guy down, but he’d asked. Taking the focus away from himself, he

slid his beer toward Vladimir. The server had dropped it off while Vladimir was in the bathroom, but
Joe hadn’t touched it, and Vladimir was already most of the way through his second.

Vladimir jerked his head toward it. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah, have at it.”
After draining his current glass, Vladimir grabbed the offering and took a sip. “Different.”
“It’s a pale ale.”
“I like it.”
“So anyway,” Joe said, doing his best not to stare at the man’s lips as they once again wrapped

around the rim of the beer glass, “It’s going to be hard to get, um, experience, if everybody thinks
you’re a homophobe.”

Vladimir stared in the direction of the large-screen TV currently blasting the NBA game Joe had

been watching at Reggie’s, but the look in his eyes was far away.

“I know.”
“But if you want some help…” Why am I offering hot hockey boy tutoring in how to fuck like a

gay man? I must be out of my freaking mind. Or a masochist. Or both. “Anyway, if you want to…”
What am I, thirteen?

Vladimir gave him a small smile. “Want to what?”
“Um, you know.” Seriously? Just spit it the fuck out, you coward. “Get together. So you can learn

more about all this.”

That wouldn’t be cheating. He and his fellow Delta Force member Brendan Booth weren’t really

a thing. They were more like friends who’d figured out the other was gay and mutually decided to
have sex to relieve the pressure. Then Joe had gotten hurt, and he’d been airlifted to Germany before
he’d even woken up. He and Brendan had spoken a few times since, but it wasn’t like they’d
committed to each other. Brendan still had a couple of months left on his tour. Joe had figured they’d
get back together in some capacity once Brendan was home, but now with Vladimir in the picture…

Joe waited as Vladimir lifted his third beer and drained a bunch more. In the back of his mind,

Joe knew Vladimir was drinking a lot of beer in a short amount of time, but he was a grown man. If he
wanted to get shit-faced drunk, especially considering the circumstances, he certainly had the right to.
He could always drive the guy home. Oh yeah, it’ll be great. You’ll be in a dark car with the hottest
man you’ve ever seen. No problem.

Setting the glass back down, Vladimir regarded him. “I would like that.”
“Oh. Oh good.” He motioned toward Vladimir’s glass. “Do you want another one?”
“Maybe a vodka shot. Would you do one with me?”
“I really shouldn’t. Me and hard liquor don’t mix well.”
Vladimir laughed, and Joe’s breath caught in his throat. I want him so freaking badly. This is not

gonna turn out well.

After flagging down the server, Vladimir ordered a shot and then finished his beer. Joe just sat

there and watched perfection. He’d been rattled by Vladimir’s revelation about his coach and the slur
but had decided not to bring it up tonight. The man had enough on his plate. Besides, the guy finally
looked comfortable, and Joe wasn’t about to ruin that for him, given how he had to hide his sexuality

every day of his life but didn’t with Joe. That was no life, and Joe knew better than most how hard it
was.

The shot came, and Vladimir tossed it down. His eyes were starting to glaze over, and Joe asked

for the check. Vladimir snatched it out of his hand, though, before fishing in his wallet for a credit
card. “You were very nice to come after me. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Vladimir.”
“I like Vlad better, please. My teammates, when they think they are funny, call me Gussy, but I

don’t like it. And you are?”

“Oh I’m sorry.” He shook his head with a rueful smile. Where was his brain? In your cock. “Joe

Bufford.”

“Joey.”
“No, Joe.”
Vlad smirked. “Joey. Yes, definitely Joey.”
“I haven’t been called Joey since I was about eight.” Vlad just looked at him, that same

expression not wavering a bit. Joe heaved a sigh. “Fine. You, and only you, can call me Joey.” Vlad’s
smirk morphed into practically an ear-to-ear grin. I need to get out of here. He couldn’t leave Vlad
alone, though. Damn sense of honor. “You shouldn’t be driving. I’ll take you home. Can you get a
teammate to drive you to practice and to your car here tomorrow?”

“Yes, sure.”
The server brought back the credit card receipt, and Vlad quickly signed the slip. Joey scooted

out and stood within easy grabbing distance in case Vlad wasn’t steady on his feet. They’d been there
under an hour, and Vlad had consumed three sixteen-ounce beers and a shot. Definitely too much to be
driving.

Vlad made it to his feet without incident, and together they walked out to Joe’s Jeep. Joe went

around to the passenger side, both to help Vlad in if he needed it and also because the stupid door
sometimes stuck. He wrenched it open, and Vlad looked between the car and him for a minute before
climbing inside. Even decidedly tipsy, the man was poetry in motion. Joe slammed the door shut to
encourage it to stay shut and trotted around to his side.

Should’ve put hot hockey boy in a cab.
Despite that, Joe not only drove Vlad to his townhouse but followed the man inside to make sure

he was okay. He stood awkwardly in the living room, trying his damndest not to pass out from blood
loss to his brain after Vlad announced he was going to change his clothes.

When he came back, Joe bit the inside of his cheek to concentrate on something besides how

luscious Vlad looked in a tank top and a pair of sweat shorts.

“Thank you for making sure I got home.”
Joe nodded, still transfixed. Finally he roused himself out of his lust-hazed stupor and strode for

the door. He needed to get the hell out of there. Vlad followed him. Before Joe could open the door,
Vlad turned him around and caged him in as his hands slapped the door on each side of his head. Then
Vlad was kissing him, his insistent tongue pressing into Joe’s mouth as he leaned his weight on him,
crushing Joe between him and the door. Holy hell. Joe wanted to sink into the kiss, wanted to sink into
the man. I can’t. I can’t deal with a closet case. I had enough of that bullshit in the Army. Besides, the
guy’s drunk. I’m the only gay guy he knows, and he’s experimenting. He’ll probably regret doing it
tomorrow. He pushed Vlad back and wiped his mouth with his sleeve.

“I was bad?”

The guy looked crushed.
“No, no, God no. You’re frighteningly good at that.” He ran a hand through his hair. Vlad

wouldn’t look at him. “Vlad, when you kiss a guy, I mean really kiss him, he should be someone great,
someone you really like.”

Vlad nodded, but the misery was plain on his face.
“Hey,” Joe said softly. “I just want you to have the best experience you can.” Even if I want you, I

won’t go through that again. I’m finally free. “I almost forgot. Before I leave, I wanted to give you my
cell number. If you decide you’d like to talk some more, I mean.” Definitely not fuck. Definitely.

Vlad turned and disappeared into his room, returning a short time later with his phone. “Put it in

for me?”

Of course, a whole litany of things came to Joe’s mind with that question, all of them dirty. He

took a deep, slow, calming breath and took the phone from Vlad’s large hands, quickly entering his
information before giving it back. “There you go.”

“I’m playing the next two nights, but maybe the day after that?”
“Sure. Call or text me.”
“Okay.”
Feeling awkward, Joe pivoted and grabbed the door handle. He opened the door and threw a “See

ya later” over his shoulder as he headed out, both excited for and dreading a call from the man.

Chapter Two

This must be what gay man’s hell looks like. Vladimir sighed before lifting his beer to his lips and

taking another sip. He hadn’t been able to connect with Joey in the past day, and now he was on the
road with his teammates at a strip club. That would’ve been great, except that the strippers were
female, and Vlad was about as excited as when he’d had a root canal after taking a puck to the face.

He was hoping he could slip away shortly, feigning tiredness, but when the guys were traveling,

they were always rowdier, and it was harder to extract himself from their grip. All he wanted to do
was go back to the hotel room, put on some comfy clothes, text Joey, and maybe watch a few of his
favorite movies on his iPad.

Joey.
The man had been on his mind a lot. At first, Vlad had been mortified about that stupid move

he’d made, but Joey hadn’t seemed freaked, at least not in the text messages they’d exchanged since.
He’d readily answered Vlad’s texts and was friendly enough. Vlad remembered standing near the door
with him and smelling Joey’s cologne. It was as if a switch had turned on, and Vlad had dived for the
guy’s lips like a starving man.

Joey wasn’t what Vlad would call traditionally hot. His nose was crooked, so it had probably been

broken. They had that in common, since Stephen had broken Vlad’s nose after the “fag” incident in the
Olympics. His hair was kind of a nondescript brown. He’d been wearing a tight pair of jeans, which
nicely outlined his package, and a Henley with a medium-weight jacket the night they’d met. No parka
for Joey. Vlad smiled. He didn’t need it. Joey made enough heat all by himself.

If Joey was ex-military, he was probably one of those tough guys, never admitting to any fear or

discomfort. He knew and understood. That by itself made him sexy as sin.

Joey was only a little shorter than Vlad’s six feet, and he still had some impressive musculature,

despite being retired from the military. He must still work out. Even the Henley and jacket hadn’t
been able to disguise the man’s body, and the jeans certainly hadn’t. He’d been packing a good-sized
bulge in the front and what looked like an incredible ass in the back.

Vlad’s cock twitched, and he glanced around in panic, lest someone see and think they should

help him do something about it. Thankfully his teammates were otherwise occupied. These strippers
could smell money from a mile away, and they flocked to the guys like there was a magnet pulling
them. One of the ladies went behind Vlad’s chair, brushing her tits on his neck. Vlad shuddered and
hoped like hell he could flee soon.

His phone buzzed, and though it was only a text, Vlad pretended it was a call and made a show of

pointing toward the door. One of his teammates, who currently had a blonde with huge boobs
bouncing on his lap—yuck—spotted him and nodded. Vlad jogged for the door. He still had his jacket
on, and with any luck, he’d be able to slip away.

He unlocked his phone and smiled. Joey.
How’s it going?
Vlad made a derisive noise.
I am at a strip club. With female strippers. What do you think?
Glancing back, he was glad to see his teammates were still occupied. I should leave.
Another text came in.
Oh. Ouch. What a way to spend the night. Done that a fair number of times myself.
A heavy hand landed on Vlad’s shoulder. Shit. Too late.

“You comin’ back? Who you talking to?”
The guy tried to make a drunken grab at Vlad’s phone, but Vlad quickly pocketed it. No

teammate was going in there to get it, so at least Vlad was safe for now. The guy pulled him along
toward the bar.

“Do a shot with me.”
“I was planning to go—”
“Oh, come on. How often do we all get to do shit like this? Let’s celebrate a little. The team’s

doing great. And best of all, there are no pain-in-the-ass coaches chaperoning us.”

Vlad had noticed that this particular group of guys had seemed to take more of an interest in him

since the Olympics and he had a feeling he knew why. They were homophobes.

Meanwhile, other guys he’d thought were friends were steering clear of him. Vlad wasn’t sure if

it was because they were disgusted by what he’d done or if they might also be gay. He had absolutely
no gaydar, particularly concerning guys like him. Guys who looked macho. Like Joey. If Vlad had
seen him in The Strike Zone or met him on the street, there was no way he would have known that
gorgeously built hunk of a man was gay.

It didn’t appear he had much of a choice about hanging around for now as a shot was thrust in his

hand. His teammate clapped him on the back. As far as Vlad could tell, he was a pretty good guy. He
was single, so Vlad at least didn’t have to watch him cheat on his wife like he’d seen a couple of his
other teammates do during the three years he’d been in the NHL. None of these guys were bad men as
far as he knew. But they weren’t people Vlad wanted to build friendships with, especially if they were
homophobes.

I should have refused to come tonight.
“You know what? I, um, have a headache. I will get a cab and go back to the hotel.”
“You can’t leave yet. We got you a lap dance.”
Vlad was pretty sure he’d blanched. He put the shot back on the bar. “Oh, that’s okay. Let one of

the other guys take it.” Please, dear God, someone else. “I am really not feeling well. I probably just
need sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Seriously? You’re walking away from a lap dance?”
He was already a couple of steps away, but he turned back long enough to say, “Give it to Patson.

Tell him it is to congratulate him on that sweet goal in the game the other night. Later.”

Vlad was on the sidewalk outside the club in record time, looking for a taxi. Finally the band

around his chest was starting to loosen. Once he was in a cab on his way to the hotel, hopefully it
would go away completely.

A taxi pulled up, and he dived in. The driver drove off, and Vlad was momentarily pressed

against the backseat cushion. He hurriedly searched out a seat belt and fastened it, forcing himself to
take a breath. He was on his way to the hotel, alone. Even better, he’d gotten out of that damn strip
club before he’d had to pretend he liked having DDs thrust in his face.

That’s not what I want thrusting in my face.
Vlad grinned. It was only in the past couple of days that he’d allowed himself to think like that. It

was very freeing. He remembered he’d never answered Joey’s text and fished the phone out of his
pocket. There was another text from Joey.

Do I need to send in a search party? Are you getting suffocated by fake tits? Those things will kill

you.

He laughed. Vlad couldn’t believe how easy it was for Joey to make him laugh.

No, sorry. I ran out of there and am in a cab.
Resting his head on the seat behind him, Vlad closed his eyes. A few moments later, the text

notification went off.

Good for you. How’d you get into that situation, anyway?
Groaning, he thumbed in a new message.
Bunch of guys were going. Hard to say no and look like a normal, red-blooded man.
He could practically see Joey nodding. They’d been able to talk some but not get together, and

Vlad had come to realize how similar the military and professional sports were in how they treated
homosexuals. Joey really had been through a lot of what Vlad was experiencing. But the lucky bastard
had come out on the other side and was now living the life he wanted. Vlad was jealous as hell.

Yeah. Sucks. Anyway, just wanted to check in. I’ll let you get some sleep. Or watch gay porn.
Vlad’s cheeks heated. Already Joey had him pegged.
Later.
He locked his phone and stuck it in his pocket again. After paying the cab driver and making his

way  up  to  his  room,  he  stepped  in  the  shower  to  wash  the  stink  of  the  strip  club  off.  Vlad  idly
wondered  if  all  female  strippers  wore  the  same  perfume.  In  his  thankfully  limited  experience,  they
seemed  to.  He  made  a  face.  It  was  becoming  more  and  more  difficult  to  even  pretend  to  be  into
women. He couldn’t let anyone in his world discover his secret, though. It would end him.

With a soapy hand, he reached down and cupped his balls with one hand and pulled on his shaft

with the other. Normally when he was jerking off, he’d bring up one of the scenes from his extensive
collection of movies, but those images were interspersed with ones of Joey now. Vlad wasn’t stupid—
he knew he might very well be fixating on Joey because he was the only other gay man he knew, but
that didn’t stop him from lusting over him.

Just in the past few months, he’d gotten adventurous enough to try a few small toys in his ass. It

had felt really weird. For about the millionth time, he wondered what a cock would be like. They were
way bigger than any toy he’d dared to play with. The guys in his movies seemed to love getting
fucked, but would he? Vlad was pretty sure he’d like getting blowjobs, since that was something he’d
been able to enjoy with women. Vlad didn’t hate women; he just wasn’t attracted to them sexually.
But when your eyes were closed, it didn’t matter if the person sucking you off was male or female.

Would Joey let Vlad fuck him? He thought he might like that better than the other way around.

Some of the stuff in those porn videos just looked…strange. The guys seemed to go nuts when they
were getting their asses licked, but Vlad didn’t see how that could feel good. An image of him and
Joey flooded his brain, with Joey bent over the bed and Vlad pounding into him from behind. Joey was
moaning and begging Vlad not to stop. Vlad’s dick was at full mast now, and his hand sped up. It felt
so good. For years he’d really let himself believe he just didn’t like sex. Now he knew what he liked,
and he wanted it.

The image morphed into one of Joey on his back, his knees way up by his ears as Vlad bent him

in half. Joey’s head was thrown back, his mouth open as Vlad worked Joey’s dick in time with his
thrusts. He had always held back whenever he was with a woman, afraid he’d hurt them. There was no
worry of that with Joey. He could definitely see liking rough sex.

Focusing on his fantasy again, Vlad tugged harder and faster, his hand flying over his hard-as-

nails dick. He tilted his head back, biting his lip. Soon the base of his spine tingled, and his back
arched. Vlad’s mouth opened. “Joeyyyyyy…” His release tumbled over his hand onto the shower
floor.

He forced his eyes open, breathing hard. Vlad knew he needed to get this growing fixation under

control  before  he  did  something  stupid—well,  more  stupid  than  kissing  Joey  the  night  they’d  met.
Joey  was  his  only  real  friend  in  the  world,  the  only  one  who  knew  his  most  intimate  secret.  Vlad
couldn’t  regret  going  to  Reggie’s  that  night.  He’d  been  humiliated  by  the  reception  he’d  gotten,  but
he’d also met Joey, and he couldn’t afford to do anything to screw that up. With that sober thought, he
finished up in the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist.

Out in the room, he grabbed a pair of shorts and then flopped onto his bed. Did he have time to

watch some movies before his roommate came home? Tyler had gone to a movie with some of Vlad’s
other teammates. Tyler had been avoiding him for months now, only speaking to Vlad when
necessary, and Vlad wondered if Tyler had a secret too. It was exhausting, trying to hide his true
nature and figure out the motives of his teammates. Vlad yawned. Bed sounded like a pretty good idea.

* * * *

Joe pulled his phone from the pocket of his coveralls. It was disgusting how often he checked it,

considering that when he wasn’t checking it, he was reminding himself why he couldn’t get involved
with Vlad. Plus, the damn thing had a notification sound Joe responded to like Pavlov’s dog, and he
was always afraid the noise in the hangar would drown it out.

He’d never had a real relationship, and Vlad didn’t seem like the best choice to try to have that

first one with. Of course, for all he knew, Vlad wasn’t even interested, despite their awkward lip-lock.
That would really be for the best.

Joe snorted. Who am I kidding? It could be a total fucking disaster, and I’d still want to do it.
There was something about the vulnerability Vlad showed that made Joe want to take care of

him. He was pretty sure he was the only one on the planet who saw that chink in the guy’s armor, and
that pleased him far more than it should. Joe’s hand slipped on the part he was pulling off the shelf,
and he swore as the sharp end of it dug into the underside of his forearm.

Keep your head in the game.
He grabbed a shop towel—thankfully a clean one—and pressed it against the gash. Shaking his

head, Joe went to find some gauze and tape to put over the wound. Of course, it had to stop bleeding
first, and that didn’t look like it was gonna happen anytime soon.

After finally stemming the flow of blood and thoroughly cleaning the cut—who knew what was

hanging around the shop—Joe wrapped tape around the piece of gauze protecting it. He’d just returned
to his workstation when his phone buzzed.

Back in town. Need a nap but could do dinner later. If you want.
Joey stared at the message. Was Vlad asking him out on a date? Or did he just mean dinner

between friends? Shit, I’m acting like a teenager, wondering if the popular girl, or, well, boy, is gonna
ask me to the prom. Get over yourself.

Dinner sounds good. I’m at work until four and will need a shower. I look like a grease monkey.

How’s six work for you?

Grabbing his work list for the day, Joe mentally checked items off. Hopefully he’d be able to get

everything done and wouldn’t have to work late. This wasn’t the kind of job where a person could just
leave at the end of a shift. If planes were out of commission, the airline was losing money, and they
expected you to stay until the jobs were finished. And the mechanics couldn’t finish without parts.

Six is good. There’s a new Thai place near me—Jasmine Thai. Do you know it? And grease

monkey? I do not know what that means, but it sounds kind of funny.

Thai food sounded awesome. Joe’s sub for lunch had been downright soggy and definitely less

than satisfying.

I’ll find it. See you then, unless something happens to hold me up here. Will text if that happens.
With a renewed sense of purpose, Joe went back to his repair.
Joe was able to get out by twenty after four and booked home to shower and change before

meeting Vlad. After drying off, Joe stood in front of his closet, staring. He had no fucking clue what to
wear. He sneered and pulled a pair of cargo pants off the hanger before reaching for a button-down
shirt. He figured between the two, he had both the casual and somewhat dressier looks covered.

He dressed and then grabbed his car keys. A glance at the clock showed he had nearly forty

minutes until he had to meet Vlad. Apparently he’d had more time than he thought, since the ride to
the restaurant wouldn’t take nearly that long. Joe didn’t want to look overexcited or desperate, so he
forced himself to sit down at the kitchen table and go through a couple days’ worth of mail. After
completing that task, he put the dishes littering the sink into the dishwasher. Finally it was time to
leave, and Joe felt like a total idiot being so anxious about this dinner.

When he arrived at the restaurant, he didn’t see any Navigators in the parking lot. He strode up to

the door, pulled it open, and nearly plowed into Vlad.

“What the hell?”
Vlad smirked. “Hello to you too.”
Joe could feel his face heating. “Hi. I, um, didn’t see your car outside. The Navigator.”
“I brought my BMW. I don’t drive the Navigator as much. Terrible gas mileage. But I think I was

trying to protect myself when I went down to Bond Street, you know, like if I were in a tank, no one
would think I was gay.” Vlad bit his lip. “I am sorry. I’m going on and on.” He started and pointed to
Joe’s bandaged arm. “What did you do? Are you all right?”

Shrugging, Joe said, “Cut it at work. It happens.”
“I hope not often.”
“No, not too often.” Joe indicated the seating area. “Shall we?”
“Oh yes, of course.”
Soon they were seated, and Joe took a moment to look over the menu. Despite the extensive array

of choices and having had all sorts of strange dishes during his time overseas, whenever Joe got Thai
food, he inevitably ended up with Pad Thai. Totally boring, but he loved it. “What are you looking at?”

Vlad looked up, and Joe swallowed hard as those light blue eyes nearly made him forget where he

was.

“Lemongrass chicken. I love spicy things. You?”
“Pad Thai,” he said with a rueful smile. “So tell me about your trip.” Making a face, Vlad closed

his menu and set it aside. Joe did the same.

“I would rather not. It was boring, and I hate that I have to act like some playboy. I’d prefer to

talk about you.”

“What do you want to know?”
They were interrupted by the server bringing over glasses of water and taking their orders. When

the man left, Vlad leaned back in his chair.

“How about…” He glanced around, and Joe did the same. No one was paying any attention to

them. “When did you know for sure you were gay?”

“That was easy,” Joe answered. “The first time I dropped to my knees and put a cock in my

mouth. Yeah, I was pretty damn sure.” He watched as the pulse point on Vlad’s neck sped up. That

would be fun to lick. Maybe later.

“How old were you?”
“Sixteen.”
“No shit. Really?”
“Yeah.”
Vlad shook his head as if he couldn’t believe it. “Who was it?”
“My friend Mark. He let me jerk him off and blow him a couple of times but after a while told

me he wasn’t gay and that he didn’t want to be friends anymore. I was crushed.”

“What a dick.”
“It’s hard when you’re that age.” Joe shrugged. “Everything seems so momentous.”
“Yeah, sure, but he still should not have done that.”
Joe wanted to alternately laugh and hug Vlad. The guy’s face was stormy, and Joe had no doubt

that if Mark were there now, Vlad would be beating him into a bloody pulp.

Their food came, and they tucked into it, not conversing much as they shoved food into their

mouths. Finally, not able to handle the suspense any longer, Joe set down his fork and took a long
drink of water. “Can I ask you something?”

Vlad looked up from his meal, a frown pulling down his mouth. Joe almost relented and didn’t

say anything, but he needed to know. It was driving him crazy.

“Yes, sure.”
“Is this…” He cleared his throat and tried again. “Is this a date?”
Vlad pushed some food around on his plate, his eyes downcast. “Do you want it to be?”
“I don’t know.”
He looked up again, his face belying his confusion. “You don’t know?”
Joe sighed. I’m fucked.
“Well, no. I’m confused.”
Vlad’s frown deepened, and Joe felt like an asshole. He needed to be able to express this, so Vlad

didn’t  get  totally  paranoid.  “I  like  you.  If  it  were  just  up  to  my  heart  and  my  dick,  yeah,  I’d  totally
want  to  date  you.  But  it’s  not,  and  I’m  a  little  leery  of  getting  involved  with  someone  who’s  in  the
closet.  I  was  there  for  so  long.  I  know  how  hard  it  is.  But  I  don’t  want  to  do  it  again.  If  I’m  with
someone, I want to be able to hold their hand when we cross a street, give them a kiss on the forehead
when I get up to go to the bathroom, stuff like that.”

“How would you do that anywhere but Bond Street?”
Joe shrugged. “Maybe I wouldn’t. But like I said, I’m tired of hiding.”
“I understand.”
The other man pushed his plate away, the kicked-puppy expression making Joe want to kick his

own ass. “What do you want, Vlad?”

Vlad took a drink, and Joe watched his throat work, his evil, dirty mind conjuring up pictures of

him taking all of Joe’s cock. He bit the inside of his cheek to stop the moan threatening to rear up at
the image.

“I want you.”
“Because I’m the only gay man you know?”
Vlad looked away. “Maybe. But I like you. You’re sexy. You’re nice to me. But I understand if

you do not want me back. I have a lot of problems. I know that.”

The guy looked so miserable. He wouldn’t meet Joe’s gaze. He had to check the impulse to reach

over and squeeze Vlad’s hand.

“I feel like a dick.”
Vlad’s gaze flew back to his face. “You aren’t. You have been great, answering all my stupid

questions.”

“They’re not stupid,” Joe argued. “Everyone has those questions when they first realize they’re

gay.”

“Probably. But most people get them answered a lot sooner than I have.”
“What does that matter?”
“I feel so stupid, so helpless.”
“Why?”
Vlad gestured to himself. “Look at me. I am a hockey player. I am strong. I am supposed to be

tough. But I’m so scared. What if someone finds out?”

“I know you said Russia isn’t gay-friendly, and believe me, I understand. The Middle East isn’t

either. But you live in the US now.”

“Yes, but my entire family lives in Russia. If I was found out, they would be harassed. And they

would probably also never speak to me again.” He mumbled something else under his breath.

“What was that?”
Vladimir ran a hand over his hair. “Not that I see them much anymore anyway.”
“It’s possible they wouldn’t take the news well, but you don’t know that for sure. So, um, I’ve

wanted to ask you about how your coach forced you to call Stephen a fag.”

Vlad straightened, stiffening. “What about it?”
“Can you tell me exactly what went on? Why you were so scared to defy him?”
“The Russian mob is bad news. I’m actually surprised they haven’t come after me for money yet.

Many of the Russian players pay them.”

“Pay them? For what?”
Rolling his eyes, Vlad said, “For protection for their families. It’s strange, because the people

they need protection from are the ones who are supposedly protecting them. There’s a lot of
corruption in Russia. Tons of it. And if you don’t cooperate with people like the guys running the
international ice hockey team, your family could be harmed.”

“That sounds kind of James Bondish. If I hadn’t been in the army, I’d have a tough time believing

it. But I’ve seen everything.”

“One player about fifteen years ago refused to pay them, and the player’s parents were

kidnapped. The guy paid—four times as much as they had originally demanded—and the mob let his
parents go. He brought them here to the US and hid them. Another guy would not pay and got beaten
up pretty badly. He missed a couple of months of the season.”

“Fuck, seriously?”
“Yeah. So when the Russian mob threatens you or your family, you listen.”
“Can’t anyone do anything about it?” Even as Joe asked the question, he knew what the answer

would be.

“No. Like I said, there’s a lot of corruption. These guys can do whatever they want. That player

whose parents were kidnapped only found them after he hired some private investigator. The police

did nothing.”

“I wish I could be surprised by that, but I’ve seen a lot of corruption too.”
“In the army?”
“A little bit there. More in the leadership in Iraq and Afghanistan. It’s unbelievable.”
“Anyway, so that’s why I didn’t say no. I really could not.” Vlad stared at the tabletop in front of

him, his brows knit.

“That totally sucks.”
“Yeah.” Vlad looked up at him. “I am sorry to be so depressing. I wanted to have a nice meal.”
“It’s okay. I’m glad I understand where you’re coming from a little better.”
“Do you work tomorrow?”
The sudden change in topic threw Joe for a minute. “Yeah, but not until midafternoon. They have

us on staggered shifts, so there’s always a parts puller, which is what I do, and a mechanic, day or
night.”

“Would you come see a movie with me tonight?”
“What’s playing?” The thought of sitting in the dark with Vlad for a couple of hours was

exciting. He just hoped he could keep his hands to himself.

“I have no idea.” Vlad pulled out his smartphone. “But I will check.”
“Sure.”
Vlad thumbed through stuff for a while, naming several movies. They agreed on one and finished

their dinner. Vlad offered to drive and bring Joe back later for his car, and soon he was sliding onto
buttery-soft leather seats.

“You like?” Vlad’s smile was contagious, and Joe returned it.
“Very much.”
At the cinema, they got their tickets and found seats about two-thirds of the way back in the

theater. The movie started, and Joe became hyperaware of Vlad’s warmth next to him. Joe had never
messed around during a movie but found that was all he could think about. Vlad’s hand lay on his
thigh. Joe imagined moving it to the placket of his own cargo pants and pressing down. He was rock
hard. A picture of him kneeling in front of Vlad and taking Vlad’s dick in his mouth wouldn’t leave
him alone either, seemingly on a loop through his sex-deprived brain.

Joe’s leg began to bounce, and Vlad leaned over, bringing the smell of his intoxicating cologne

even closer.

“You okay?”
Not trusting himself to speak, Joe merely nodded.
I am sooo going to hell.
He’d been screwed from the first minute he’d seen Vlad. The man was far too tempting for Joe’s

peace of mind. Before he had more time to drive himself crazy, Joe grabbed Vlad by the chin. There
were only four other people in the theater, all sitting farther forward. Joe kissed Vlad, swallowing the
little moan that escaped the other man. His cock twitched, and he wanted to make Vlad moan again, to
lose control, no matter where they were.

Joe ran his tongue over the seam of Vlad’s lips, and they immediately parted, letting his tongue

in to explore. Vlad tasted vaguely of spice, and Joe couldn’t get enough. Emitting a low growl, Joe
dived in farther, and Vlad matched his marauding tongue stroke for stroke. Reaching down, Joe
unsnapped Vlad’s jeans. Vlad jumped and pulled away, his eyes wild.

“What are you doing?” he whispered, wildly scanning the room.
“I need to touch you.”
“Here? Now?”
“No one’s watching.” Joe ran the backs of his fingers along the ridge of Vlad’s cock. “Let me.”
“Fuck.”
Vlad quickly unzipped and pulled out his dick. Joe’s mouth watered, but he knew instinctively

the guy would freak if he tried to go down on him here. Vlad’s cock was perfect—a little longer and
definitely thicker than his own—and Joe’s ass clenched as he imagined taking that stiff rod inside. He
was too far gone to stop now and took a firm hold of Vlad’s dick, pumping it. Slipping his other arm
around the back of Vlad’s seat, he kissed Vlad again, partly because he loved the taste of him and
partly to disguise the little moans and groans Vlad was making as Joe worked him. It didn’t take long
before Vlad spurted hot cum all over Joe’s hand.

Pulling away from Vlad, Joe brought his cum-covered hand to his mouth and licked it clean.

Vlad’s eyes were like saucers. He grabbed Joe by the back of the neck and brought their lips together
in a bruising kiss, pushing his tongue inside his mouth. Joe shared Vlad’s flavor with him, but broke
the kiss to help Vlad put himself back together before someone caught them. They watched the rest of
the movie, though Joe mostly stared at the screen without seeing much. In hindsight, he couldn’t
believe Vlad had let him do that in a public place. The guy must’ve been unbelievably horny. They’d
have to be more careful from now on if Vlad didn’t want to be found out.

Joe closed his eyes, cursing himself. What was he doing? He’d let his dick rule, and it had gotten

him in trouble, since he hadn’t been able to stop, to leave Vlad alone. He’d only just figured he was
gay and Joe was already trying to get into his pants. Vlad’s kisses were intoxicating, and Joe was very
afraid he wouldn’t be able to go back to being friends, even if he should. He opened his eyes when a
big fight scene began, and as the carnage played out on screen, all Joe could see was the same thing
happening if he and Vlad went on. In the end, Joe’s heart was likely to be the thing bleeding.

Chapter Three

Joe was out of his seat and exiting the theater as soon as the credits started playing. He was in the

parking lot looking for his Cherokee when Vlad tapped him on the shoulder.

“I’m over here.” Vlad gave him a strange look, and Joe followed him, feeling totally out of sorts.

They got into the car, and Vlad started to drive back to the restaurant without a word. Finally, with the
tension in the car so thick Joe could practically hold it in his hand, Vlad spoke.

“Look. I do not know what happened back there, but I’ve never come that hard in my entire life.

At first I had so much fear, sure everyone in the theater was watching, but the movie was so loud and
no one seemed to notice. I cannot take a chance like that again, no matter how much I want to. I meant
what I said, though. I’ve never come that hard. I want to do it again. I want to do it to you. Just not in
public.”

Joe’s tongue felt thick in his mouth. “We shouldn’t,” he finally managed to say. Vlad pulled the

wheel to the right, and Joe’s hands shot out to brace himself, his heart in his throat. Pulling the car
onto the shoulder, Vlad slammed it into Park. “What the fuck, Vlad?”

“You are jerking me around.”
“I made a mistake.”
“That did not feel like a mistake.”
Even in the darkness of the car, Joe could see Vlad’s eyes had narrowed to mere slits, and his

nostrils were flaring. A lesser man would’ve been afraid of the guy.

“It was.”
Vlad slapped the steering wheel. “I-I do not understand. You say you will help me figure out this

whole gay thing, you answer question after question after question, you agree to have dinner with me
and go out to a movie, but you say touching me was a mistake?”

“It was,” he repeated, trying like hell to get his point across. What point it even was at this

juncture, Joe wasn’t sure. But there were good reasons for them to go no further. Joe needed to keep
repeating them, to concentrate on them.

He flattened himself against the side of the car in alarm when Vlad undid his seat belt in record

time before reaching for his. Vlad’s hand rubbed Joe’s cock through his pants.

“This is a mistake? If it is, why are you hard?”
“Natural reaction,” Joe grumbled.
“Bullshit.” Vlad wrenched Joe’s zipper down, and a little whimper of distress that the man would

injure his favorite part died in Joe’s throat when Vlad began to jerk him off before leaning down to
take Joe’s cock in his mouth.

“Fuck! Vlad!” Joe’s head fell against the window as he tried like hell to get up the gumption to

push the other man away even as his ears rang from the impact. Vlad was humming around his length,
and Joe was already so far gone, one hand found the back of Vlad’s head and took hold while the other
one grabbed the dashboard. Just as he was about to lose it, Vlad pulled off and sat up. “Wha?”

Vlad clipped his seat belt, not looking at him, and put the car back into Drive.
“I was proving a point. Something that feels that good could not be a mistake.”
Oh, it definitely could. He couldn’t believe Vlad had left him like that, his hard-as-nails dick

pulsing and standing up lewdly from his pants. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

Glancing over, Vlad said, “I will finish it. If you’ll admit you want this as much as I do.”

Joe groaned. “Vlad, please.”
“Please what? Please swallow my dick again? Please make me come?”
Vlad’s voice was harsh, echoing around the interior of the car, and Joe took a minute to force his

cock back into his pants. “Please don’t do this.”

Vlad laughed, but Joe heard no humor behind it.
“Why? We like each other and make each other feel good.”
“It’s way more complicated than that, and you know it.”
Sighing, Vlad said, “Yeah, I do. I am the one who stands to lose everything here. I realize that.

But I’m tired of this. I’ve finally figured out who I am. I’ve been so scared my entire life, even when I
had no idea what I was scared about. But now I am a grown man, and I know what I want. I want you.”

“And I don’t want to be forced back into the closet.”
“You should not have kissed me. You should not have jerked me off.”
He shot a furious, frustrated look at him. I should know better.
“You’re right. But that’s why it’s a mistake,” Joe said, rubbing his temples as a sudden headache

threatened to give him the final nudge to the loony bin.

“I am not going to let you make me feel dirty about this.” Vlad swiped at his eyes.
Joe felt like an even bigger asshole. “I don’t want you to feel dirty. That’s not what this is about.

What we did wasn’t dirty. It was natural. It just…shouldn’t happen again.”

“For a guy who faced down death every day, you are a fucking pussy, you know that?”
Joe’s eyes widened. He’d never heard such venom, but he supposed Vlad had a right to be angry.

Vlad swung into the restaurant parking lot, and gravel kicked up in all directions.

“We are here. Have a nice life.”
“Vlad.”
“Go. Just fucking go.”
With another glance at Vlad’s tormented expression, Joey got out of the car. As soon as he’d

closed the door, Vlad peeled away, kicking up more gravel. Joe trudged to his Cherokee, climbed in,
and put his head in his hands. What had he done? He couldn’t leave things like this. Vlad deserved
better. Joe wasn’t even sure why he’d reacted the way he had. But now he needed to fix it. He couldn’t
live with himself, knowing he’d caused Vlad pain just because he was chickenshit. He began to
formulate a plan.

* * * *

Vlad sniffled, trying like hell to hold in the tears threatening to fall as he drove away. He would

not cry over the first guy he’d ever had sexual contact with. It was dumb. Joey probably wasn’t even
worth it.

Yeah, he is.
He tried to tell himself to shut up, but no matter how angry he got, the overwhelming emotion

rolling through him in waves was still hurt. He’d opened himself up to someone, and that person had
shit all over him.

In some ways, Vlad wanted to go back to his sexless existence. He’d at least had some peace. It

wasn’t a great peace, but it was there. Now a whole new world had opened up to him and just as
quickly had been slammed shut again. Vlad arrived at his place and pulled the BMW into the garage.
He wasn’t even sure how he’d gotten home.

Though it was dark, Vlad put his head down as he went to the street to get his mail, so no one

would see the sheen of tears in his eyes. Once he had it, he turned and began to trudge inside. He
jumped when a Jeep careened into the driveway. His hand holding the mail went over his heart. At the
moment, it was pumping like he was at the end of a too-long shift. What the hell?

Joey flew out of the driver-side door and barked out, “Get in the house.”
“What? Why?”
“Because you were right. I acted like a prick, and I’m sorry. So get in the house, or your cock’s

getting sucked right here in the driveway. And that’s just for starters.”

Vlad’s mouth fell open, but apparently his feet had gotten the message loud and clear, as they

propelled him through the open garage door. Joey hit the garage door mechanism to close it as Vlad
led him into the house. As soon as the door closed behind them, Joey pushed him against the opposite
wall and dropped to his knees.

“Joey—”
“Shh.”
Within seconds, Joey had Vlad’s cock in his mouth. When he swallowed it to the root, Vlad’s

eyes rolled back in his head, and a feral grunt escaped him. Before he even processed what he was
doing, he’d grabbed Joey’s head in both hands and begun to fuck the man’s mouth. Joey took
everything Vlad gave him, making hot little moaning and whimpering sounds.

“Joey, oh fuck. Want to finish you. Taste you. On the floor.”
He dropped onto the tiled floor, not giving a shit about the cold that instantly seeped into his

bones, and arranged himself to take Joey’s dick as Joey sucked his. They both ended up on their sides
as Joey moved with him. He’d seen this done in his porn movies, and it had always looked so hot. The
reality didn’t disappoint. Vlad was very much afraid he was turning into a cock slut, since right now,
all he wanted to do was play with Joey’s equipment for hours. Everything was so new and cool, and
finally, finally, felt right. This was what he’d been waiting for his entire life, even when he didn’t
know it.

Joey removed Vlad from his mouth long enough to say, “Gonna come. Pull off if you don’t want

to swallow.” Vlad just tightened the grip of his lips, and Joey swore viciously before commanding,
“Come with me.”

The thread of steel in his voice, coupled with the sheer ecstasy that was the experience of getting

blown by Joey, was more than Vlad could take. He had to concentrate to keep his mouth tight and
moving as his orgasm burst from him. A few seconds later, Joey’s hot, salty cum landed on his tongue,
and he swallowed, taking care not to fuck up his first blowjob by getting cum all over the place.

After both of them had recovered their breath, Joey rolled over onto his back. “That’s the first

time I’ve ever just dropped and gone at it.” He turned his head and looked at Vlad. “It was so fucking
worth it.”

Vlad wanted to ask where this left them but was afraid to break the spell. Two orgasms in the

space of less than a few hours left him feeling lethargic. He struggled to his knees and tucked his spent
cock back in his black dress pants before pushing to his feet. Joey did the same.

“I, um, I don’t know what to do now,” Vlad admitted, feeling like a total idiot.
“We should talk, and then I should probably go.”
Or you could stay and show me what “just for starters” means. Like maybe what being inside

your perfect ass is like.

“Oh. Okay.”

Way to not sound pathetic.
He brought Joey from the mudroom where they’d stopped, up the stairs and through the kitchen

to the living room, or, as Vlad thought of it, the scene of the original crime. Joey sat down at one end
of the couch and scrubbed his hands down the thighs of his pants.

“Could I get a glass of water?”
He seemed pretty jumpy, and Vlad frowned. “Of course. Hang on.” Vlad jogged back into the

kitchen, returning quickly with two bottles of water. It seemed important not to leave the man alone
for too long with his thoughts. He gave one of the waters to Joey and took a seat on the chair to Joey’s
left.

Blowing out a breath, Joey opened the water and tossed the top on the end table between the two

of them. After taking a long drink, he cradled the bottle in his hand. Vlad waited him out, dying a little
more with every ragged breath Joey took.

Please don’t break my heart.
“It would appear I can’t stay away from you,” the man said with a rueful smile.
Good. I plan to keep it that way.
Joey looked up at Vlad. “For the record, I still don’t think this is a good idea.”
Vlad threw up his hands, sending water everywhere. He transferred the bottle to the table and

wiped the water on his shirt, his gaze not leaving Joey’s. He wasn’t going to let the man off that easy.

“What are you saying?”
“That we’ll need to be careful if we do this. What I did in the theater—that was stupid, and I’m

sorry. I should know better.”

“I was not exactly pushing you away.”
“I know, but I could’ve showed more self-restraint than that and will in the future, no matter how

hot you look.”

Joey smiled, and Vlad felt the edges of his mouth kicking up. “So what should we do? Can we go

out at all? I don’t know what people will think is weird.”

“Sure we can. We just have to play it cool. Friends go out to dinner and shit all the time.”
Americans cracked him up. And shit. What did that even mean? “Okay…and what about when

we’re not in public?”

Now Joey’s smile turned into a full-fledged grin. “I strip you naked and do wicked things to your

body. Maybe you can do some wicked things to mine too.”

Vlad’s cock began to fill again. “I want to fuck you.” He clamped his hand over his mouth.
I cannot believe I said that.
But Joey chuckled. “Probably not tonight, but if you play your cards right—”
“I didn’t mean to—”
“Yes, you did.”
Vlad acknowledged the statement with a slight nod of his head. “Maybe so. But I should not have

just…” His hands flailed as he tried to come up with the correct word in English. Usually he did pretty
well speaking the language, but sometimes specific things escaped him.

“That’s fine. It’s pretty hard to offend me.” Joey tilted his head. “Like I said, we should talk. We

need to know more about each other, particularly me about you, so I don’t freak you out or hurt you.
Have you ever, you know, played with yourself?”

“Like jerked off?”

“No, like played with your own ass. Fingers, toys?”
“Oh. That.” Heat flooded Vlad’s face. Someday maybe all this stuff wouldn’t embarrass him.

“Yeah, but it felt weird.”

Joey nodded. “That’s pretty normal. Did you find your prostate?”
“No, I was too afraid to, uh, go very far inside.”
“Hmm.”
“What?”
Staring intently at Vlad, Joey said, “This might actually be fun.”
Vlad raised an eyebrow. “Fun?”
“There’s a lot of pleasure to be had in gay sex, and I’m kinda looking forward to introducing you

to it, horny little bastard that I am.”

“I would like that.” Vlad bit his lip. “But I am not sure I want to be fucked. It sounds pretty

scary.”

“That’s fine. I can top or bottom, doesn’t make much of a difference to me. Both feel good. And

there are lots of other things we can do.”

Vlad nodded, relieved Joey seemed to be taking everything in stride. “I have seen how excited the

guys get when they were getting fucked in the pornos, but that is not real. They were acting.”

“Oh, no, they weren’t acting,” Joey answered with a wolfish smile. “In fact, I bet if I fucked you,

I could make you come without ever touching your dick.”

“I don’t know about that.” Vlad squirmed at the mere thought of it.
“I do.”
He shifted again. “Pretty confident.”
“I pay attention. That’s all the confidence I need.” He jerked his chin toward Vlad’s crotch.

“Again? Seriously? Dude, I know you’re only in your midtwenties now, but really. How are you doing
this? I’m not much older than you, and I don’t have this kind of stamina.”

Vlad couldn’t hold back a self-satisfied smirk. “There are advantages to being a professional

athlete.”

“I was in the military until nine months ago. I’m not exactly falling apart.”
“No, you definitely are not,” Vlad murmured.
Joey raised an eyebrow. “What was that?”
“Nothing.”
Joey grinned, apparently letting Vlad off the hook.
“As I was saying, I’m in pretty good shape, but no way could I get it up three times in, what, two

hours?”

“I guess you must turn me on.” Vlad shrugged, trying and failing to keep a straight face. He’d had

no idea just talking to a man could be this much fun.

“Apparently. As much as I’d like to stick around and help you take care of that, I should probably

go for now. I want you to think about everything, all right? Things moved pretty fast today, and I want
you to be on board, not freaking out or bolting, though I’d definitely understand if you just wanted to
forget this whole night happened. I’ll call you day after tomorrow. If you need me, though, call or text.
When are you going out of town again?”

“Not for several more days. We have a three-game home stand, playing tomorrow, Saturday, and

next Tuesday, before leaving on Wednesday for a short trip up to Toronto and Ottawa Thursday and
Friday.”

“Wow, have you got the whole schedule memorized?”
“I’m good with stuff like that.”
“You’re good with a lot of things.” Joey rose. “Walk me to the door?”
“All the way over there?” Vlad asked, pointing to the exit about fifteen feet away.
“Maybe I’m just looking for an excuse to kiss you good night.”
“You don’t need an excuse.” Vlad rose and stalked Joey as the other man walked backward, a

cocky grin splitting his face. He sped up and pushed Joey toward the wall with one hand on his chest.

“Rough. I like it.”
“I do too.”
Vlad planted his hands on each side of Joey’s head once he rested against the wall, trying not to

remember the last time the same thing had happened practically in the identical spot. He tilted Joey’s
head to his liking before attacking his lips. He fucking loved kissing. Surely there were a lot of other
things he’d love, once he’d experienced them, but the give and take of kissing was awesome.

Joey spun them, running his hands down Vlad’s torso before grabbing his hips and pulling their

groins flush with each other. Despite what Joey had said earlier, he was hard too, and the delicious
friction of their cocks rubbing together made Vlad crazy. He moaned into Joey’s mouth. Joey started
nipping down Vlad’s jaw before taking his earlobe into his mouth and sucking. Vlad gasped, arching
against him.

“Should stop,” Joey muttered after releasing Vlad’s ear.
“Mmm,” was about the most intelligent thing Vlad could force out. He pushed Joey back and then

flipped the other man around so that his back was to Vlad’s chest. Joey’s hands scrabbled on the wall
when Vlad grabbed his ass cheeks and squeezed. He quickly lowered his zipper and fit his cock
between Joey’s rounded globes encased so nicely in a pair of perfect cargo pants. Joey groaned.
“Yeah…I want this.”

“Shit, Vlad. We need to slow down.”
As Joey had done to him before, now Vlad took hold of Joey’s hips, simulating fucking him from

behind. Joey’s head fell back as swear words tumbled from his mouth. Vlad knew Joey was right; they
needed to cool it, but damn, it felt so fucking right to sandwich his dick between Joey’s taut cheeks. It
would be even better if the man wasn’t wearing clothes, but Vlad was close to exploding nonetheless.

Calling on every ounce of mental fortitude he possessed, Vlad stepped back, panting. With a

growl, Joey pivoted and dropped to his knees, forcing Vlad’s pants open and taking his cock into his
mouth again. Joey’s fingers fumbled as he pushed the offending garments to Vlad’s knees along with
his boxers. Vlad let out a startled sound at the assault. He was surprised his dick wasn’t sore from
earlier, but the warm wetness felt so good, quickly pulling him down into an abyss of pleasure. Joey’s
tongue traced one of Vlad’s balls, and Vlad gripped the wall and the door behind him in a desperate
attempt to remain upright.

Joey moved his legs farther apart to lave at the tight sac. A steady stream of incoherent ramblings

rumbled from his mouth as Joey took him to heaven. His legs locked, shaking, and Joey swallowed
him again. His orgasm bubbled up, and he came on a hoarse scream. This release actually hurt a little,
but Vlad paid no heed. His knees buckled, and Joey grabbed him around the thighs.

Joey pulled off Vlad’s softening dick. “Whoa, there, honey. I’ve got you.”
Vlad lowered himself to the floor, his pants still around his knees, and kissed Joey for all he was

worth. Only when oxygen became a vital necessity did he break off. Leaning his forehead on Joey’s,
he stared into the other man’s eyes. “You are amazing.”

Joey grinned. “I really should go, or the next thing you know, I’ll have you bent over the nearest

surface and my tongue in your ass.”

Vlad let out a sound suspiciously close to an unmanly whine. He wasn’t sure how he felt about

doing that, much less having it done to him, but right now just about anything Joey wanted to try was
fine with him. Giving a tired laugh, he said, “I should get a good night’s sleep. Someone took all my
energy.”

“Then get one.” Joey lightly kissed him and helped him stand before straightening his own

clothing.

With what he knew was a goofy grin, Vlad pulled his jeans back up but left them unzipped. They

were coming off as soon as Joey left anyway. “Talk to you tomorrow?”

“I’m working one p.m. to ten.”
“That’s okay. We’re playing.”
Joe nodded. “You’d better get some rest. I won’t be the cause of you dragging your tired ass out

there.”

“I will.”
“Later.”
Vlad closed the door, collapsing against it afterward. His introduction to gay sex had been

absolutely fucking incredible. If Joey could top that, he might have a shadow for life.

Chapter Four

Vlad slept like the dead, almost missing the morning skate. He had to bend a couple of physics

laws on the way to the arena and still barely made it onto the ice before the assistant coaches started
the drills. Vlad was a center and spent some time working on faceoffs after the regular skate was over.
He was a little over 51 percent on them, which put him in the top third of the pack in the NHL, but he
needed to be more consistent.

After taking what felt like about a hundred faceoffs against the other centermen, Vlad did a few

stretches before lumbering off the ice. He took a quick shower and joined his teammates at an Italian
restaurant a few blocks from the arena. He went home to take his pregame nap, but now that he wasn’t
so exhausted from the previous night’s activities, he had trouble falling asleep.

Visions of Joey sucking his cock filled Vlad’s mind as he tossed and turned. Normally he was out

like a light, since he’d long ago trained his body to sleep any time of the day or night, but now the
sheets felt hot and scratchy and he couldn’t get comfortable. His dick was hard, and Vlad decided
there was no way he was going to be able to relax if he didn’t do something about it.

Taking his raging erection in hand, Vlad began to stroke himself hard and fast. He preferred not

to rush things, but he needed to sleep. Even now he could feel Joey’s warm mouth surrounding his
cock, and Vlad moaned. While he’d had blowjobs from women, knowing the last few had been from
Joey, a man he could finally open up to and not feel so alone, made the experience mind-blowing. He
was leaking precum freely and used it to lubricate his shaft and the head of his cock while continuing
to take himself higher. Soon his toes curled, and his back arched. Vlad released a loud groan as cum
splattered onto his abs and chest. He worked his dick, milking it, and finally let it go, breathing hard.

Vlad cleaned himself up and rolled over, spying his phone on the nightstand next to him. He’d

never sent a sexy text to anyone but found himself composing one to Joey in his head. Did he dare?
With a grin, he grabbed the phone and thumbed in the message.

Just jerked off and came all over myself, thinking about you sucking my dick last night.
Dropping the phone on the bed next to him, he wondered how long it would be before Joey was

able to read the text. It was well after one, so he was at work now. Vlad was just starting to drift off
when his text notification went off, startling him. He picked up the phone and unlocked it.

Give a guy a warning. Now I have to disguise a huge hard-on from thirty coworkers. I can’t wait

to do that again and more.

More. Did Vlad want more?
Hell, yeah I do. I want to fuck him.
That line of thought wasn’t helping him sleep.
Sounds good. I’m up for it whenever you are.
After he sent the text, he realized how it sounded and chuckled.
Yeah, you were certainly “up” for it last night, big boy. I’ve gotta get back to work. Later, babe.
With a chuckle Vlad settled down, curling his large body around several pillows. Soon he was

asleep and didn’t wake until his alarm went off at four that afternoon. He dressed in a dark gray wool
suit with a lighter gray shirt and a gray and purple tie. Vlad considered taking a picture of himself and
sending it to Joey. He knew he looked good. The suit had been custom tailored and was from one of
those famous designers. In the end he decided that was a girlie thing to do. He gathered his wallet,
keys, and phone and hopped into his Navigator —the huge SUV better equipped to escape puck
bunnies and harder to dive into if they were really desperate—and was at the arena before five.

He changed into a pair of sweat shorts with socks, sneakers, and a team T-shirt and joined some

of the other guys out in the hall to kick around the soccer ball. He heard someone say “Heads up!” and
saw a ball booted in his direction. Luckily, Vlad had excellent reflexes and kicked it right back at the
man before flipping him off.

“Dick.”
“I’ll show you a dick.” The guy grabbed the front of his shorts, and Vlad had to fight not to look.

This kind of banter was common among the guys, and if Vlad reacted, they would’ve been suspicious,
but damn, now that his libido had been awakened, even the guys who he’d thought of as little more
than brothers were looking entirely different to him.

They played soccer until five-thirty, when several of them went into the weight room to ride the

bikes to get their hearts pumping and their blood moving. Vlad jumped on a wind bike next to the
team’s enforcer, Pat. Vlad was no shrinking violet at six feet even and over two hundred pounds, but
Pat made him feel like an infant next to a giant. The man stood six-eight and weighed two hundred and
sixty pounds.

The running joke was that Pat didn’t have to throw punches in a fight—he could just sit on the

guy and win. Despite his formidable size, Pat was one of the biggest jokesters on the team and great in
the locker room. He was also one of the only players who hadn’t treated Vlad any different after the
Olympics.

“Hey, man,” Vlad said to him. “Nice moves during that interview the other night.”
Pat grinned. “It was the rook’s first time. I had to do something. He was nervous.”
“Right,” he answered, drawing out the word and shaking his head, fighting his own smile. “Are

you trying out for one of those celebrity dancing shows or something?”

Pat snorted. “Those shows don’t want guys like me. They want all the pretty ones.” He glanced

over at Vlad and smirked. “Like you.”

“Fuck you. I am not pretty.”
Pat reached a large paw out and ruffled Vlad’s hair. Vlad growled, and the other man laughed.
“Okay, okay. I’ll be nice.”
“If you start dancing in the background of any of my interviews, you will get a surprise.” Once

the words left Vlad’s mouth, he bit his lip. That sounded like flirting. Dealing with guys who didn’t
know he was gay was like navigating a fucking minefield. It was exhausting. He wasn’t even attracted
to the guy.

“What’re you gonna do, dip me?”
Vlad laughed, though it sounded forced to his own ears. “I might.”
“You’d drop me on my head for sure.”
“So what? That has been done a million times before.”
Pat leaned over a little, his expression serious. “You hear about Jason Monroe?”
Jason, more commonly known by his nickname Roney, was a player on another team who’d been

outed against his will after a bus crash at the Olympics. Though the incident had been nearly a year
ago, he was still the only openly gay man in the NHL. Vlad’s heart felt as if it were trying to make a
break for it out of his chest. “What about him?”

“I knew the kid could take care of himself, but I guess Vasille said something to him on the ice

last night.”

Oh no…

“What happened?” Vlad asked, doing his best to keep his voice steady.
“Monroe ignored the guy at first, but when he kept going, Roney dropped the gloves. He got

Vasille’s jersey over his head and pounded the old man. When Roney backed off and Vasille’s head
finally popped out of the jersey again, his nose was gushing blood and one eye was closed. I’m
thinking people aren’t gonna be as quick to say stuff to him now, considering he’s pummeled both
guys who did.”

“Yeah, hopefully not.”
“I don’t get it, man. This stuff has no impact on how the kid plays. What difference does it make

who someone loves?” Pat’s gaze turned away.

Vlad shrugged. “I don’t know. People do not like thinking others are different.” He was afraid to

say too much, even though it certainly appeared Pat wasn’t one of the homophobes on the team.

“Can I ask you a question?”
Vlad groaned to himself, knowing exactly what was coming.
“Sure.”
“Why’d you call Stephen a fag? I mean, we all hate playing the guy—he’s so freaking good—but

why go there? You don’t strike me as the type of guy to care or be prejudiced.”

Vlad swallowed, his throat tightening. “I, um…” He searched desperately for something to say.

How did you justify spewing hate?

You don’t.
“I was being a dick. Trash-talking should never go there. We were up against a wall, and the

coach was yelling at us to do something, anything to get those guys off their game. I didn’t think. I
just did it, and I could not take it back.”

“Fair enough,” Pat responded, glancing at him. “I just really didn’t take you for a homophobe.”
“I’m not. At all.” If only you knew. “I knew he gets trash-talked all the time here in the NHL and

had heard everything. Gives it right back too. So my brain came up with something I thought might be
different, and it came out of my mouth. It was stupid.”

“I can see how you would think that would get to him, especially since it appears he’s straight.

And apparently it did. We’re playing Boston next week, you know. Want me to have a talk with him
so he leaves you alone?”

“No need. I got it.” They’d played Boston a few times since the Olympics, and Pat always offered

to protect Vlad, but the way Vlad looked at it, if Stephen wanted to punch him again, he’d let him.
Vlad deserved it.

“Okay, man.”
They finished their workout in silence, Vlad’s mind going a mile a minute. It was getting harder

and harder to hide his sexuality. Jason was getting some shit, but Vlad hadn’t heard a ton of chatter
about the guy. Maybe there was hope for him yet.

The game was uneventful, thankfully, and Vlad’s team won by two goals. He had one of them, a

shot he took right off the faceoff. As he skated back to the bench to receive high fives from his
teammates, he smiled. It appeared all the extra practice had been worth it. Vlad showered and changed
back into his suit before checking his phone.

He’d been afraid to look before because he didn’t trust his reactions around Joey. Popping a

woody in the locker room would be pretty awkward, even if his teammates thought it was because of a
woman. Vlad would still get teased mercilessly. It was about ten thirty, so Joey should be getting
home soon. There were no messages. Joey was probably still at work. Who knew how much crap could

break on those airplanes? Considering the mileage Vlad flew every year, he didn’t want to think about
it too closely.

Grinning, Vlad began to type out a text message. He couldn’t help it. Though he might very well

end up hard, he was really enjoying this—what did they call it?—oh yes, sexting. It was fun.

We won, and I scored a goal. Wanna suck my cock? That sounds much better than a high-five.
Just the thought of Joey’s mouth around his dick notched his temperature up about twenty

degrees, and he pulled at the too-tight collar of his dress shirt. He left the arena and was almost out of
the parking ramp when the text notification went off. Vlad was in a long line of cars, so he checked the
text.

If I didn’t have to be back on at seven a.m., you know I would. I need to get some sleep. Not a

morning person.

Vlad chuckled. Maybe someday soon he’d get to see that in person. He reminded himself to get

more coffee. Joey seemed like the type to drink the stuff by the gallon.

Get some sleep. Talk tomorrow.
He pulled out onto the road and attached the phone to the car’s computer. A minute later, the text

noise went off again. Vlad pushed a button on the steering wheel to get the disembodied voice of the
computer to read it.

I’m on from seven until four.
Vlad pressed another button to record a text back. We are leaving in the afternoon . He punched

the button once more for it to send.

The reply came quickly.
Travel safe, and keep that hot bod of yours away from other guys.
Vlad barked out a laugh. Joey’s words sounded so freaking strange coming from the car’s

computer voice thing.

I will do my best.
At home he drank two glasses of water, even though he knew he’d have to get up to empty his

bladder in the middle of the night. If he didn’t hydrate, he definitely felt it, and after a game when
lactic acid was building up in his muscles, it was especially important. He crawled into bed, and for
the first time ever felt how very alone he was in it. Vlad was falling, and falling hard.

I don’t even know this guy. Not really.
He punched his pillow, trying to get it into the shape he wanted.
But I want him. I really fucking want him. Yeah, want to fuck him.
Vlad groaned. Giving himself the boner from hell was not the way to get any sleep. Finally he got

up and popped a couple of those pain relief-sleep combination pills and willed himself to calm down.
After two a.m. he finally succumbed to sleep.

* * * *

The next day, Joe grabbed some takeout after he got off his shift and headed home. He considered

going down to Bond Street, but besides Vlad, he knew few gay men in the area, and certainly none he
could call out of the blue and invite for a drink. Reggie’s was always cool, but he wasn’t sure he was
ready to go back there and endure all the curious stares. Undoubtedly everybody would want to hear
how he’d given Vlad a piece of his mind, and Joe hated lying. He’d done so much of it in his life and
was sick to death of having to spin every little thing.

After changing out of his greasy clothing, Joe flopped down on the couch and picked up his

remote. He surfed, frowning when mushy movie after mushy movie came on. What the hell? He
glanced at the display on the television’s channel guide and did a double take. It was Valentine’s Day.

Ick. No wonder.
After finding a sports talk show, he settled down to eat. The hosts were talking about some

formal backing thing the NHL and NHL Players’ Association had done with the You Can Play Project,
an organization trying to end homophobia in sports. They were the first professional sports league to
make a statement supporting what You Can Play was trying to do. Joe loved their slogan. If you can
play, you can play. A couple of minutes later, his fork made a scraping noise, and he looked down to
see he’d eaten every bit of food in the container.

Joe’s heart stuttered as the full implication of what the announcers were saying registered. Maybe

there was hope for Vlad yet. If the entire NHL and NHLPA were coming out—so to speak—in support
of You Can Play, the culture had to be changing inside the locker room. Maybe Vlad could stop
hiding.

He wondered briefly if he should mention Valentine’s Day if he spoke to Vlad anytime soon. To

his mind, they were dating, but guys were different than girls. They didn’t usually care if they got
flowers and chocolates. In fact, they much preferred steaks and blowjobs, a concept he could support.
Joe didn’t want Vlad to be disappointed if he ignored the holiday, but then again, Vlad hadn’t said a
thing about it either. In the end, he composed a simple text.

I’m a dumbass. Just realized it’s Valentine’s Day. Hope you had a good day. Miss you.
With a grin, Joe rose and threw away his trash. He turned around in the kitchen doorway and

glanced around the apartment. It could use a good cleaning, and since it was only around dinnertime,
he’d have plenty of opportunity to spit-shine the place before bed. He took a measure of all the rooms
so he could make a priority list. The kitchen was the worst, since he had a bad habit of leaving crumbs
on the counters and dishes in the sink. Already the “always neat and tidy” mantra drilled into him in
the army was fading.

His phone pinged.
Miss you too. Can’t talk. In locker room with game about to start. Will try to call tomorrow.
With his mind more at ease, Joe cleaned the little cobwebs out of the corners of the kitchen,

working from top to bottom—wiping down the cabinets, scrubbing the countertop and sink, and lastly
sweeping and mopping the floor. Joe looked up at the clock. Seven thirty. Plenty of time to do more,
even though his back was screaming. The line of work he was in didn’t help keep the pain away, since
it was so physical with lifting parts and pushing the full carts around, and he’d already put in a full
shift at the airport, but Joe wasn’t trained for anything else.

Maybe I should go back to school. But to study what?
Joe sighed and went to work on the bathroom next. The question—what to study—had been

bouncing around in his head for months, and he still had no answers. He was grumbling about the
gross look of the caulk on the tiles and wondering if the landlord would recaulk the bathroom, or let
him do it, when he faintly heard his phone ringing. Throwing the sponge into the middle of the tub,
Joe sprinted toward the living room, wiping his hands on his T-shirt as he went. The phone was
merrily bumping across the coffee table. He snatched it up.

“Hello?”
“Hi, it’s Vlad.”
Joe grinned and caught his reflection in the television screen. Ugh. Get a hold of yourself.
“Hey, you. What’s up?”

“Just got back from dinner with the guys. I am full of steak and potatoes.”
“Is eating so much food at one time good for you?”
“Probably not, but we went to Morton’s. They have fucking good steak.”
Joe laughed. “Never been, but I’ll take your word for it.”
“Oh man, it’s really great stuff. I will take you when I get back into town. There is one in

Pittsburgh.”

“Sounds a lot better than the burrito bowl I had for dinner.” Joe’s mouth watered. He loved steak.

He bit his lip. Don’t be a pussy. Ask him. “So are you asking me out on a formal date?”

Vlad chuckled. “Do I have to wear a tuxedo if it is a formal date?”
“Very funny.”
“To answer your question, yes, I am. You didn’t think I was only going to use you for sex, did

you? I mean, if that is what you want…”

“No, it’s not what I want. I’m just a little, um, surprised.”
“Why?”
“Two men eating alone?”
“Many business dinners are at Morton’s.”
“If you say so,” Joe replied. “I just want you to be comfortable.”
“Shit, I have to go. My roommate is coming. Later.”
Vlad hung up before Joe could even say good-bye. After setting the phone back on the coffee

table, he plopped down on the couch and leaned his head back to stare at the ceiling. When Vlad had
said it was a date, Joe’s dick had gone rock hard and was still throbbing. He wished like hell Vlad was
there. He closed his eyes, trying to recapture the feel of Vlad’s mouth on him.

Before he knew it, he’d shoved his sweats down and taken his erection in hand, concentrating

more fully on the memory. He spit into his hand and used the lubrication to speed up his stroking. The
familiar stirrings of an orgasm began in the base of his spine, and he went even faster, adding a little
extra pressure on the head each time. He was about to blow when the text notification sounded and
broke his reverie.

Joe’s eyes popped open, his dick jumping in his hand. He considered ignoring it, but if it was

Vlad, he wanted to see it. With his cock still in hand, he reached with the other one for the phone and
was glad he had.

After talking to you, I need to take a shower. I can only hide the boner underneath the covers so

long, and I definitely do not want my roommate to think it’s for him. Ick.

He laughed. With his left hand, he fumbled through a reply.
What’s so bad about your roommate?
All the while he’d been idly stroking, and he looked down at himself, sighing. He’d gotten pretty

used to jerking off while overseas—whenever there was enough privacy to, anyway, which wasn’t
often. Now he had a guy who appeared more than willing to help him scratch the itch, but if their
schedules kept clashing, he had no idea when he’d see Vlad next.

Nothing, but he is like a brother.
Joe smiled.
Yeah, a little awkward.
He set the phone down and started jerking again, determined to get release. Even though it had

been less than comfortable, the sixty-nine they’d had on the floor the other night had been one of the

hottest  things  Joe  had  ever  done.  Thinking  about  that  set  him  off,  and  he  spilled  all  over  his  hand.
After  grabbing  some  tissues  from  the  end  table,  he  cleaned  himself  up  and  tried  to  regulate  his
breathing. Joe went into the bathroom and washed his hands. When he got back to the couch, there was
still no reply, and he decided to confess what he’d been doing. Yeah, it was a little sadistic to torture
the  guy  who  already  had  a  stiffy,  but  Joey  wanted  Vlad  to  know  how  much  just  thinking  about  him
turned Joey on.

I just came. Was thinking about our sixty-nine the other day. Hot stuff.
His cock moved a little again, and Joe groaned. Vlad needed to get back here. Joe would happily

give up his ass to the man right now, and he doubted he’d feel differently when Vlad returned. He’d
done both in his lifetime, topped and bottomed, and though he preferred topping, bottoming could feel
fucking incredible too if the guy knew what he was doing. Joe frowned. He’d have to make sure Vlad
took his time and prepared him well. Joe liked rough sex, but there was a difference between rough
sex and not-properly-prepared-to-take-a-cock-in-his-ass sex.

Fuck, man. I just had to run into the bathroom.
The image of Vlad looking like a marathon runner but with that log of his between his legs

tickled Joe, and he snickered.

Sorry.
He got up to fix himself a snack, bringing the phone with him.
I don’t think you are sorry at all.
Joe grinned. Nope, not in the least. With his snack made, he went back to the couch. The

bathroom wasn’t finished, but he was done cleaning for the night. Any of the original enthusiasm he’d
had for the project had long since vanished. Flipping on the television, he found a movie he’d already
seen a dozen times and settled back with his beer, lying back against the arm of the couch and
balancing a bowl of salsa on his belly and the chips between his legs.

He thumbed out another text.
Okay, you got me. I’m not sorry.
Joe took a minute to turn up the sound, enjoying the effect of the surround-sound speakers during

the fight scene playing out on-screen.

I’m going to shower, hopefully jerk off without my roommate seeing me, and go to bed. Later.
Shaking with laughter, Joe put a hand down to keep the salsa from landing on the couch.
Good luck tomorrow. Call me so we can set up this date thing.
Relaxing once more, he watched the movie and ate almost half a bag of chips. If he kept this up,

he’d  have  to  step  up  his  workouts.  Right  now,  he  was  getting  away  with  hour-long  sessions  two  or
three times a week, but the minute some pudge started to show, he’d step it up. Joe wasn’t sure if all
men  were  like  this,  but  many  gay  men,  himself  included,  were  pretty  vain  when  it  came  to  their
appearance.  If  the  straight  men  he  saw  around  work  were  any  indication,  they  didn’t  give  two  shits
what  they  looked  like.  Just  today  Joe  had  watched  in  morbid  fascination  as  a  coworker  had  downed
four burgers and two orders of fries, washing it all down with an enormous soda pop. Gross.

Joe fell asleep on the couch, and when he awoke around three in the morning with a crick in his

neck, he winced. If he didn’t stretch the kink out now, experience told him he’d be hurting by the time
he got up in a few hours. He took a few moments to stretch his lower back and legs as well, stumbled
into the bedroom, and dropped face-first on the bed. He grabbed the covers, rolled over, and promptly
fell back to sleep.

Chapter Five

Joe worked some weekends, but on this particular weekend, he was off. It bummed him out Vlad

wasn’t around, but at least he’d be back tomorrow. Maybe they could even go on their date tomorrow
night. He tried to look on the bright side of not having the man around. Tonight he could watch Vlad
play without worrying about having to get to bed for work the next morning, listening to the radio
while he worked, or any of the other dumb things he’d been contending with when Vlad was playing.

Having grown up in a small town about ninety minutes from Pittsburgh, Joe was naturally a fan

of the Phantoms, but he’d never taken an interest like he was now. They were playing Boston, and both
teams were in the thick of the playoff race. Right now, Pittsburgh was two points behind New Jersey
for the lead in their division, while Boston was four points ahead in theirs but had played two more
games than the team right below them.

After spending the day cleaning the rest of the house and running errands, Joe made a pot of

spaghetti sauce and sat down to eat like a civilized adult. It was easy to just sit on the couch or the
floor in the living room and chow down while he watched television, but with spaghetti, there was
potential for a disaster. As a nod to trying to eat better, he’d purchased one of those complete salad-in-
a-bag things. He dumped the contents into a bowl and made himself eat that before the noodles.

He finished up and cleaned the kitchen, stowing away the remainder of the sauce in the freezer,

and  went  into  the  living  room.  The  pregame  had  just  begun,  and  he  sat  down  to  watch.  The  camera
zoomed in on Vlad near the bench area, one skate up on the boards as he bent forward to stretch. Of
course  the  sight  caused  an  erection  as  Joe’s  brain  flooded  with  the  ways  he  could  bend  Vlad  to  his
liking.  Joe  sighed,  forcing  his  attention  back  to  the  screen.  The  camera  had  moved  on  to  highlight
some  other  players,  but  Joe  still  watched  Vlad,  who  was  now  in  the  background  doing  some  stretch
that made him look like a frog.

Joe’s phone rang, and he picked it up. Obviously it wasn’t Vlad, and his parents were down in

Florida for the month and virtually unreachable with their antiquated cell phones. He hadn’t
reconnected with too many people in the time he’d been home. He hadn’t wanted their sympathy, and
none of the friends he’d had before deployment knew he was gay.

His heart skipped a beat when he checked the caller ID. Brendan.
Joe took a deep breath. “Hey, man! How ya been?”
How was he going to explain Vlad to Brendan? Was it even necessary to? He didn’t want to out

the other man.

Your dick got you into another mess.
The line crackled, and Brendan’s deep voice answered, “Good, and I’ve got news.”
“Oh yeah?” Joe glanced at the screen. Vlad had just taken a shot in warm-ups, and Joe watched as

he turned away from the goal. He frowned. Shouldn’t he be wearing a helmet? He realized Brendan
had stopped talking. Shit. Busted. “Sorry man, you cut out on me some. Can you repeat that?” It was
amazing how easily the lie slid off his tongue, even though he hated being less than truthful.

“I said they’re sending me home early. Did you see the speech the president made? He wants the

troops out as soon as possible.”

“Didn’t see it,” Joe murmured.
“Anyway, I should be stateside in a few weeks and completely done about six weeks from now.

Of course, those plans could get blown all to hell. You know how the army is.”

Yeah, I do.

“Wow. Congratulations.”
“I thought after seeing my folks for a couple of days, I could maybe come to Pittsburgh to see

you.”

Joe closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. “Sure, man.” He was happy Brendan was getting to

leave, but Joe was with Vlad now. Did Brendan just want to get together as friends? Did he want
something more? Now was not the time to talk about things like that, so Joe kept his thoughts to
himself.

“I miss you.”
Fuck. “I miss you too.” They chatted about mundane things for a few minutes, but as the game

was about to start, Joe said, “I gotta go. I’m meeting some friends. Um, call me when you get back to
the States. We’ll work something out.”

“Awesome! Can’t wait to get out of the sandbox. Setting my boots on grade A USA soil for more

than a few days will be fucking sweet.”

“I hear you, bud.” He winced. Joe had never called Brendan “bud” in the entire fourteen months

they’d been stationed together.

Luckily Brendan didn’t appear to notice. “I’ll let you go. Later.”
Joe hung up and put his head in his hands. He and Brendan hadn’t made any promises to each

other, but the niggling sense of guilt that he hadn’t told Brendan he was involved with someone was
starting to eat at him.

The national anthem began on the television, and Joe stood. Even at home, he showed respect for

his country. People who had never laid their lives on the line serving in the military didn’t understand
the special relationship many veterans had with the United States. Sure, there were a lot of things
wrong with the country, but Joe had traveled to several corners of the world while deployed. He’d seen
atrocities he couldn’t even begin to describe, along with poverty, corruption—you name it, he’d seen
it. Joe loved the United States fervently.

Vlad was on the ice, his skates sliding back and forth, presumably to keep his muscles warm. The

anthem singer finished, and Joe watched, rapt, as Vlad took a couple of quick turns around the ice
before skating up to the red line to take the opening faceoff.

The action was fast and furious for the first period, and Joe followed Vlad when he was on the ice

and the entire play when he wasn’t. Vlad was never out of position, back-checked readily, and took the
body when necessary. Joe had no idea why, but watching him play was pretty fucking sexy. The period
ended, and Joe made some popcorn, grabbing a beer to wash it down with. He sat on the floor with his
legs underneath the coffee table, leaned his back on the couch, and settled in for the second period.

About seven minutes in, the Phantoms were awarded a power play after a Boston player high-

sticked a guy. Vlad came on as part of the first power-play unit. He took the faceoff in Boston’s
defensive zone and immediately drove to the net. The puck came back to an eighteen-year-old phenom
from Sweden who was stationed at the blue line. The kid let a shot rip, and Joe watched in horror as it
hit Vlad down low, knocking him onto his back where he spun out of control, crashing into the net. He
was holding his leg, his face contorted in pain. Play stopped. Joe’s heart stopped too as Vlad rolled
onto his side on the ice, still clutching his leg.

The announcer was speculating about where Vlad had been hit, and Joe had a very real concern he

was  going  to  lose  the  contents  of  his  stomach.  He  had  a  whole  new  respect  for  the  spouses  of
professional  athletes.  Of  course,  it  wasn’t  too  different  from  military  spouses  in  some  ways,  but  at
least  the  spouses  rarely  had  to  sit  there  and  watch  their  loved  one  be  injured  right  in  front  of  them,
where they could see.

The kid whose shot had hit him skated right to Vlad and was bent over, resting his stick on his

knees a few feet away as the trainer came out onto the ice. Joe felt bad for the guy. It wasn’t his fault.
The shot was low, exactly where it should be. It wasn’t like he was trying to take someone’s head off.
He looked pretty shaken up, though.

The trainer took hold of Vlad’s leg and straightened it. Vlad grimaced. They wouldn’t move his

leg if they thought it was broken, would they? The television cut to replays from a couple of different
angles, and Joe had to look away when the side angle clearly showed the puck hitting Vlad near where
his foot and ankle met. They returned to live in time to see the trainer and the young kid put Vlad’s
arms around their shoulders and start to slide him toward the dressing room. Vlad wasn’t putting any
weight on his leg at all. Joe’s stomach churned, his heart in his throat. Ironically, it was the same
feeling he’d had after he’d fallen and had known immediately he was badly hurt.

He rose and began to pace. They had to give some sort of an update, right? Finally, between the

second and third periods, after Joe had circled his living room about a million times, the announcers
said Vlad had a lower body injury and would not return.

“Lower body injury? Well, duh. Great powers of deduction. The fucking puck hit him in the

foot.”

Joe would never understand why teams hid what sort of injury the player had suffered. It was

clear  in  the  replay  it  had  been  his  foot  or  his  ankle.  Joe  continued  to  pace,  his  teeth  picking  at  his
chapped  lips  until  they  bled.  The  game  ended,  and  he  kept  the  postgame  on  in  case  there  was  any
news.  Shortly  after  the  coach’s  postgame  press  conference,  where  the  man  gave  the  same  bullshit
explanation, his phone buzzed. Joe practically dived for the stupid thing. It was Vlad.

Got hit with puck. Big bruise on my ankle. Hit between skate and pads. Sucks. Will call tomorrow

with more details. Gave me good painkillers.

With a hand over his heart, Joe took a deep breath. The news wasn’t good but could’ve been

much worse, he knew. Those bruises were painful, but it shouldn’t keep him out of commission for too
long. Joe had experienced his fair share of similar injuries and kept going. But hockey wasn’t exactly
like Delta Force, where they regularly made lifesaving missions even while badly injured, so likely
Vlad would get a few games off.

Get some sleep, baby, and let me know if you need any help. Do you have a ride home?
He sat heavily on the couch, relieved Vlad’s injury wasn’t more serious. A deep bone bruise,

which Vlad most likely had, was nothing to take lightly, but he could’ve broken his leg or worse.

One of the guys can drop me off. If you are free tomorrow, maybe you can take me to pick up my

truck.

Joey smiled.
Of course I can. I’m off work and at your disposal.
Yawning, Joe looked at the time. Eleven o’clock on a Saturday, and I’m considering going to bed.

What the hell happened to my twenties? He made a derisive noise. The army happened. Joe didn’t
regret joining the army, but there was no doubt it had eaten up a good chunk of time in the past several
years.

Hmm. Interesting idea. Will call tomorrow after I wake up. Just took pills. Sleepy time.
He laughed, thinking about Vlad all curled up, his leg elevated who-knew-where. No doubt his

ankle would be killing him for the next couple of days. Maybe he’ll need a nurse. Perhaps a rectal
exam. Joey rolled his eyes. Yeah, it’s definitely time for bed when stuff like that seems funny.

After turning out the lights, he crawled into bed. If he had anything to say about it, he’d be in

Vlad’s bed tomorrow night.

* * * *

“Dude, we’re home.”
“Wha?” Vlad rubbed his eyes.
“We’re in Pittsburgh. This is traditionally when we get off the plane.”
He cracked an eye open. “Yeah, yeah. Give me a minute.” His teammate turned away. “Hey, can

somebody take me home? I probably should not drive.”

The man turned back and smirked. “You do look like shit.”
“Thanks.”
“Yeah, I’ll drop ya.”
Vlad gathered his stuff and slowly followed his teammate to his car, leaning on the crutches

they’d  given  him.  Soon  he  was  home  again.  After  checking  the  time,  he  took  another  painkiller.
They’d  called  it  a  bruise,  a  word  that  made  his  injury  sound  so  minor,  but  his  ankle  was  swollen  to
almost twice its size and had turned colors for about a six-inch circle around the point of impact. It
hurt  like  a  motherfucker,  and  if  Vlad  was  going  to  sleep,  he  had  no  doubt  drugs  would  need  to  be
involved. He crawled into bed and pulled up the covers, wondering how much time he would be off
before  he  was  cleared  to  play  again. At  some  point,  it  would  become  a  pain  issue,  and  Vlad  could
handle pain. He’d been doing it all his life, whether physical or emotional.

Thank freaking God he hadn’t discovered his homosexuality until he’d gotten to the US. If

anyone in Russia had found out… He didn’t allow himself to go down that road. He was worrying
unnecessarily and decided he needed sleep. It took a while, but he drifted off into dreams of life as he
knew it ending if his secret were ever revealed.

He woke up at ten a.m. with a text from the trainer.
Stay off your foot as much as you can. Come back in a few days, and I’ll have a look. Until then,

rest. Ice. Pain pills if you need them.

Though Vlad didn’t like missing games, the idea he might be around to spend more time with

Joey sent a little thrill through him.

Okay, thanks.
Vlad drew a bath, since he figured a shower wasn’t on the “need to be on your feet for” list, and

sank into it. His sore, tired muscles began to relax, and with his foot propped on the side of the tub, he
reached for his phone.

You up?
Snickering, he considered sending a second text about hoping the man was. Before he could, his

phone pinged.

Are you asking if I’m awake or if I have a woody?
He laughed. Apparently dirty minds thought alike.
I’ll take either.
Settling into the tub more, he sighed, wondering why he didn’t take more baths. Or get a hot tub.

Of course, he’d have to get a house, and he wasn’t sure he was ready for that.

Yes, I’m awake, and I didn’t have a woody till I read your text. Now I do. How are you feeling?
Vlad snorted.
In pain. And like I want to help you with that woody. Maybe it would distract me. When can I see

you?

Ugh. He sounded too eager. Hopefully Joey didn’t scare easily.
How about twenty minutes?
Groaning, he let his head fall back for a moment before answering.
See you then.
Though he would’ve liked to soak in the tub longer, if it was a choice between lounging here or

messing around with Joey, it wasn’t a question. He wondered if the man would want his ass today, or
if he’d give his up. Joey said they could take things slow, and truthfully, Vlad thought of himself more
as a top than a bottom, but topping all the time wouldn’t be fair, right? His now erect cock bounced on
his stomach as he thought about fucking Joey. Yeah, a plan he could get behind.

Behind. Heh.
Vlad carefully and slowly climbed out of the tub and dried himself off before heading into the

bedroom. He’d just slipped into sweat shorts—and nothing else—when he heard a knock. Looking at
the T-shirt in his hand, he grinned and dropped it on the bed, his raging erection leading the way. Vlad
limped without the crutches, but he hated using them. He opened the door.

Joey’s jaw dropped. “Holy mother of…” His arms waved in Vlad’s general direction. “I fucking

want you. Now. Where’s your bedroom?” Vlad pointed behind him, and Joey said, “I know we need to
be careful of your ankle, but your injury is about the only thing I plan to handle gently. Just warning
you.” Leering at Vlad, he said, “Need me to carry you?”

“I’d like to see you try.”
Joey raised an eyebrow. “You’re aware I’m ex-military, right? Remember? Delta Force?”
“Yes, and I also know I weigh over two hundred pounds.”
With a smirk, Joey picked him up like he weighed nothing, threw him over his shoulder, and gave

his ass a couple of good slaps. Oh, that felt…interesting. His sweat shorts were thin, and he hadn’t
bothered with underwear, so there wasn’t much between his skin and Joey’s strong hand.

The man marched with purpose down the hall. Wonder if he’s reliving his military days .

Reaching the bedroom, Joey put an arm under his knees, slid Vlad down, and set him on the bed.
“Didn’t want to hurt your ankle. Shit, quite the ugly mess.”

“Yeah. I’ll be out for at least a game or two.”
“A game or two? Yeah, right. That does suck, though. I hated missing time when I was injured.

Speaking of sucking.” Joey eyed Vlad’s erection. “I think you need some help with your flagpole. Or I
could show you something different. But you need to get rid of those shorts in any case.”

“You’re wearing more clothes than I am.”
Joey pulled his sweater over his head. “Workin’ on it.” Once he had his clothes off, he climbed

onto the bed and helped Vlad remove his. “You stay right there. Have you got lube?”

“Uh, yeah. In the drawer.” He indicated the nightstand, sending up a silent cheer he’d gone to the

drugstore for supplies just in case, and Joey produced the small bottle.

“Watch.”
Joey poured a generous amount into the palm of his uninjured hand, and Vlad’s eyes grew wide.

The man lowered himself over Vlad, lining up their hard cocks. He supported himself on one forearm
and circled both erections, spreading the lube. Vlad thought he would stop there, but Joey had other
ideas. He firmly grasped the two of them and jerked hard.

“Fuck!” Vlad arched, his ass cheeks clenching as sensation rolled through him.

“Thought you’d like this.”
He kept up a punishing pace, and Vlad could hardly breathe. Everything Joey showed him was

mind-blowing, so how good would fucking the man be? Vlad couldn’t wait to find out.

“Can I—” He arched again as Joey squeezed their cockheads together. “Wanna fuck you.”
Joey grunted and sat back on his heels. “Gimme the lube again.”
Vlad found it and handed it over.
Joey began to finger his own hole, and Vlad about swallowed his tongue. “So sexy. I could come

just from watching you.” Vlad chewed the inside of his cheek. “Um, what do I need to do?”

“Put on a condom. Now.”
Joey’s voice had turned gravelly, and Vlad hurried to comply. Good thing he’d bought condoms

as soon as he’d met Joey. If they’d had to stop now, Vlad was sure his head would explode. Joey
poured yet more lube into his hand and slicked it over Vlad’s erection.

“I’ll ride you. It’ll be easier for you to not have to worry about anything. Just relax and feel. Shit,

we should probably get tested. I haven’t been since I left Delta Force.”

“I get tested by the team for everything. I guess they want their bases covered.”
“Good to know. I’ll make an appointment. Now lie back and enjoy.”
Vlad understood that Joey had prepared himself and wanted to be on top because it was Vlad’s

first time, and the image of the man astride him as he rode Vlad’s dick certainly was hot. Despite that,
he hoped Joey would show him how to do this stuff so Vlad could be more in control. Joey straddled
him, lined himself up with Vlad’s already pulsing cock, and began pushing down.

“Fuckfuckfuck,” became a litany as Joey sank farther onto Vlad’s erection, his own head thrown

back and mouth open.

Joey’s cock waved between them, but Vlad was too far gone to do anything about it. He’d just

discovered nirvana. “Gotta come.”

“Not yet,” Joey forced out through clenched teeth. With one quick motion, he bottomed out and

sighed. “So fucking good.”

“Move.”
“Relax. Feel me around you.”
“I can, and I am losing my mind.” Vlad bucked upward, which was tough with his weight on only

one foot on the bed. “Please.” His eyes rolled into the back of his head when Joey finally obeyed him.

Joey raised and abruptly lowered himself once more, pulling a gasp from Vlad.
“Fucking myself on your cock. So good. Love your dick.”
Vlad forced his eyes open. He wanted to see his lover as they connected for the first time this

way.

Joey stared down at him. “Mmm. Wanna ride this luscious cock till I pass out.”
“Sounds good,” Vlad got out as Joey began his excruciatingly slow up-and-down motions. He

grabbed his dick, and Vlad pushed his hand away, taking Joey’s erection in hand. Precum was flowing
freely, and Vlad used it to slick the way. “Want you to come.”

Joey huffed out a laugh. “I will.”
He sped up, and Vlad kept up with him, pulling on Joey’s shaft. Vlad squeezed the fat cockhead,

and Joey swore.

“Like?”

Stiffening above him, Joey cried out, “Coming. Ah, fuck!”
He tightened around Vlad’s cock inside him, and Vlad lost it, pouring his seed into the condom.

As much as he would’ve liked to watch Joey come apart, there was no way he could focus with this
much pure pleasure streaming through his veins.

After what seemed like an eternity and yet was just a speck of time, Vlad began to come back to

Earth. So, so incredible. Want him again already.

Joey pulled off Vlad and collapsed to the side of him.
Vlad reached a blind hand over and landed it on Joey’s damp torso. “Okay?”
The other man chuckled. “So yeah, that’s gay sex. Well, penetrative sex.”
“Loved it. I want to do it twenty-four hours a day.”
Slowly turning his head to regard Vlad, Joey asked, “Do you mean like we just did? Because you

were incredible.”

Words were spilling out of his mouth, and Vlad had a hard time not hugging the guy for being so

adorable.

“We never have to do more. There’s still lots of other stuff we can have fun with, though, if you

want. And if you’re not comfortable, I’m fine with bottoming. I told you that.”

Vlad had removed the condom, tied it off, and dumped it into the waste bin by his bed while Joey

was talking. “I want to. I think.”

Joey gave him a gentle smile. “I have an idea.”
Should I trust that look? He hasn’t steered me wrong yet. Vlad raised an eyebrow. “Okay. What is

it?”

“You said you had toys.”
Vlad nodded, feeling his face heat.
“Where are they?”
Turning onto his stomach, Vlad reached under the bed and pulled out a box. Joey took it from

him as he rolled back over onto his back. “There are only a couple of things. I’ve been too paranoid to
buy more.”

“There are Web sites, you know. You don’t have to go to an adult store in person if you don’t

want to.”

Vlad grunted. “Still makes me nervous.” Joey opened the box, and Vlad watched as he picked

through his small collection of dildos and the one butt plug he’d been brave enough to buy.

“Besides, everything you bought could be for a woman too. It’s not like the items scream ‘gay

sex’ or anything.”

“If you say so.”
“Don’t forget about the online places the next time you want something. I’ll write a few down for

you.”

“Okay. Or, um, you could buy stuff for me.” He flashed his best puppy-dog look at Joey, who

rolled his eyes.

“If it would make you feel better. Back to my idea.” He looked Vlad in the eye, his expression

serious. “Do you feel comfortable with any of these?”

If possible, his face flamed even more, and he wondered if you could give yourself sunburn from

the inside. “They’re okay. Yes, sure.”

“Would you let me put one in your ass? I can make it feel so good. I promise.”

After what Joey had just let Vlad do, he figured he owed it to the man. He nodded.
“I want to make sure you’re good with this. Are you, really?”
“Yes.”
“I won’t do anything to make you uncomfortable, so feel free to say no.”
“Yes. I-I want to. I want to know what it’s like.”
“My cock is bigger than these toys,” Joey said with a smirk.
“I know. But at least I could start getting, um, used to things.”
“Good enough. Get on your hands and knees. It’ll be easier for you. Tell me if anything hurts, and

I’ll slow down.” As Vlad did as he bade, Joey asked, “Too much for your ankle?”

“No.” I cannot believe I just got on my knees to offer my ass to someone.
“I’m going to tell you everything I’m doing so you won’t wonder.” The bottle of lube snicked

open again. “Gonna put my finger near your hole, but not inside. Yet. Don’t fight it. Relax, and the
whole thing will be easier.”

Vlad leaned his head on his forearms, which pushed his ass up in the air even more. “Ready.”
“You have no idea how fucking sexy you look right now.” Joey groaned. “But I promise to go

slow. Like I said, if anything hurts too much, let me know, and I’ll back off. It’ll feel weird, like you
said before, and there might be some soreness or burning, but it will fade. I promise.”

He touched his lube-slickened finger to Vlad’s pucker. Vlad jerked.
“Shh, relax.”
Vlad took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. Joey rubbed his back.
“We don’t have to do this.”
“Want to.” Joey began to gently massage around Vlad’s hole. Vlad couldn’t keep a moan from

escaping and heard Joey chuckle from behind him.

“Feel good?”
“Yeah. I am…surprised.”
“I told you I’d make you feel good.”
As they talked, Joey continued to circle the outside but never pushed inside. Vlad felt his ass

relax.

“That’s it, baby,” Joey crooned as if he were talking to a frightened child, and Vlad supposed in

some ways he was. “You’re doing so well.”

Vlad took another deep breath and let it out. Closing his eyes, he said, “Put your finger inside.”
“You’re okay?”
“Yeah. Do it.”
“I’ll go slow.”
The way Vlad felt right now, he didn’t want to go slow. But he’d seen Joey’s dick up close and

personal, and there was no way he’d be able to take it comfortably without this preparation, so he
leaned more fully on his folded arms.

Another squirt of lube, and Joey was back to massaging. Vlad was about to tell him he really was

fine and Joey could do more when the man’s well-slickened finger popped right into him.

“How far are you?”
“You’ve taken half of my finger.”

“Give it all to me.”
“Want me to show you where your prostate is?” Vlad groaned. “I’ll take your response as a yes.”
He pushed in farther and slowly rotated his finger. Vlad nearly jumped out of his skin as Joey

began to rub one particularly sensitive area.

“Fuck.”
“There’s your prostate.” Joey’s tone was clearly amused, but Vlad didn’t care. This felt

incredible.

“More. Fuuuuuck more.” But Joey withdrew his finger. “What the hell?”
Another chuckle. “Lubing up another finger. I think you can take two. By the way, I have no

intention of fucking you tonight. Maybe next time or the time after.”

“Oh.”
“You sound disappointed.”
“I’m not.” Yes, I am. Shit, I want Joey to fuck me. This is weird.
“Two fingers coming. Try to relax and push back on them.”
At first it burned, and Vlad hissed, but Joey kept moving forward.
“How’re you doing?”
Vlad took a moment to assess things. “Good.”
“The burning fades after you get through those muscles. That’s why I didn’t stop.”
Joey pushed both fingers in, scissoring them, and Vlad felt an ache inside, but it wasn’t as bad as

he’d thought. Then the man nailed his prostate with both fingers.

“Fuck.”
“One-word vocabulary, huh?”
“Never thought it would be this way. Feels so good. So much.”
“Give it a minute, and it’ll feel even better.”
Vlad very much doubted it could as Joey was currently launching an all-out assault on his

prostate as far as he could tell. Joey began to fuck his ass with his fingers, going over that one
completely awesome spot again and again, and an orgasm reared up.

“Gonna come.”
“Do it, baby.”
He began to work his own dick in counterpoint to Joey, and soon his balls drew up tight.

“Joeyyyyy!” White ropes of semen burst from his cock and fell on the bed. Joey didn’t let up, hitting
Vlad’s prostate over and over again until finally Vlad gasped and stopped him.

“I’m taking my fingers out. It might smart a little.”
Slowly Joey pulled out of his body, and Vlad collapsed on the bed, not even caring he was

covering his belly and chest in his own spilled cum. He heard Joey washing up, and soon a warm
washcloth gently cleaned him. He sighed. “So good.”

“Roll over, baby.”
Vlad did, and Joey worked the sheet off the bed.
I really like the way he calls me baby.
“I’m guessing you have a washing machine around here somewhere.”
Vlad waved in the general direction, eyes still closed.

“You’re a mess, babe. Just lie there and let me take care of you.”
“Next time we see each other, I want you to fuck me.” I can’t believe I said that. I can’t believe I

want that. The aftershocks of the orgasm told him he was making the right choice, though.

“I won’t argue, but I want you to be absolutely sure you’re into it.”
“I am. I will be.”
Vlad heard the splat of the washcloth and figured Joey must’ve tossed it into the bathroom. The

bed dipped, and Joey spoke directly into his ear.

“Remember how I said I could make you come without touching your cock?”
“Mmm, yeah.”
“I didn’t touch it. And it was your second go for the night.”
Vlad finally opened his eyes. “You are amazing.”
“Keep talking, and I’ll have a huge ego.” Joey stared down at him, his head propped on his hand.
“You should. You’re hot.”
“So are you. I mean, look at this body.” He motioned from Vlad’s head to his toes.
Glancing down, Vlad shrugged. “I’d rather look at yours.” He nodded toward Joey’s left hand.

“How is it? Okay?”

“Fine. There’s no pain, just the numbness and the loss of strength in my grip. But as long as I get

enough rest and don’t try to overdo it, the stupid thing really isn’t much of a problem. More like an
annoyance.”

“I can imagine.”
“How’s the ankle?”
“Throbbing.”
“Want some ibuprofen?”
“You really do not have to wait on me.”
“You’re not supposed to be walking. Where are they?”
With an exaggerated eye roll, Vlad said, “Yes, the ten-foot walk to the bathroom would definitely

be too hard for me.”

Joey lifted him and pushed him onto his side before placing a hard smack on his ass before

setting him back down. The whole thing was over before Vlad even responded to it, which was
something, given the reaction time required of a professional hockey player.

I like this side of Joey. What does it mean? What does it make me? Will he still let me fuck him if

I tell him I like it when he smacks my ass?

“So, bathroom medicine cabinet?”
“Yeah.”
After disappearing for a moment, Joey returned with a bottle of water and three pills. “You’d

better drink this too. You’ve lost a lot of fluid in the past couple of hours.”

“Ha-ha.” Vlad took the pills and followed them with several swigs of water. Joey took the bottle

from him and set it on the nightstand. “Can I ask another question?”

“You don’t have to check with me first, babe. Just ask.” Joey climbed back into bed and settled

down.

Vlad rolled onto his side so he and Joey were facing each other. “Right after the Olympics, I

applied for US citizenship. I have been living here for ten years and have had a green card for over

five years, so I was allowed to pursue it. I am expecting to hear soon whether or not my forms were
accepted. Would you help me study for the test? I assume someone who was in the military is pretty
good at US history. I think I will do okay on the language part of the test, but we can practice that too.
You can talk dirty to me, and I’ll see if I understand it.”

Joey laughed. “I would like to think I’m good with US history, though I definitely wouldn’t call

that an across-the-board thing. There are different levels of intelligence in the military, but I can say
one thing for certain. Delta Force doesn’t attract or put up with any dumb-asses.”

“So would you?” He bit his lip, feeling kind of dumb asking the other man for help.
“Of course.”
“Oh. Well, thanks.”
“You were expecting me to say no?”
“I was not sure what you’d say.” Vlad gave a little shrug with the shoulder not bearing his weight,

knowing he was probably blushing again.

Joey reached up and cupped his face. “Considering where our various body parts have been, I

think we’ve gone past polite.”

Vlad’s blood heated at the memory of Joey riding him and having the other man send him into

space.

“You have a point.”
Joey leaned in for a kiss, and Vlad opened to him immediately. Pushing Vlad onto his back, Joey

climbed on top, never letting Vlad’s lips go. As Joey continued to drive his tongue into Vlad’s mouth,
Vlad found his dick waking again. How was it possible?

“You got a third leg I don’t know about?” Joey asked as he pulled away.
“Huh?”
Joey rubbed their pelvises together. “Someone’s ready to play again.”
“Sorry.”
“What are you sorry for?” Joey tilted his head to the side, then slid his tongue up Vlad’s neck.

“Do you have any idea how much of a turn-on it is?”

“How I am like a horny teenager who cannot control his dick?”
“No.”
Joey bit down on Vlad’s ear. Why the hell does that feel so good?
“How you want me so much you’re still hard after all we’ve done.”
Leaning down, he swallowed Vlad’s half-hard cock, and both of Vlad’s hands flew out to grip the

man’s head. “Sensitive.”

Joey pulled back, licking gently. “More your speed right now, maybe? A little lighter touch?”
“Why does you doing it feel so much better than a woman doing it?”
“Because I have a cock, and I know exactly what to do,” Joey said before licking around the head.
Vlad arched. “Can’t take any more. Want to.”
“You should probably conserve some energy for getting better, so you can get back on the ice.

I’m a bad influence, I know.”

“Anytime you want to ‘influence’ me, just let me know.” Vlad grinned, arching both eyebrows.
Joey barked out a laugh. “So, um, do you want me to get out of your hair?”
“Would you stay? I’ve never…”

“Slept with a man before?”
“Well, besides roommates, and they have their own beds. Plus, ewww.”
“I can stay, babe.”
Vlad once again marveled at how much he liked the way Joey called him “baby” and “babe.”

Never in a million years would he have thought an endearment would make any difference to him.
There was only a couple of years’ difference in their ages, but Vlad felt special to Joey when he used
those endearments. Probably a foolish romanticized thing, but hey, this was Vlad’s first relationship.

“I promise I will let you sleep in a minute. But I have one more question.” Taking a deep breath,

he asked, “Do you think we’re in a relationship?”

“Hmm.” Joey set his chin down on Vlad’s abs and seemed to be considering the idea.
“Never mind. It was stupid to ask.”
“No, no. I want to answer.” He looked up and studied Vlad for a moment. “I don’t want to see

other guys. Do you?”

“Oh shit, no.”
“So we’re seeing each other exclusively.”
“Okay.”
“Which is oftentimes how a relationship is classified. So yes, we’re in a relationship.” He kissed

Vlad’s stomach and looked up once more. “Are you all right with that?”

“Yes. Yes,” Vlad answered with a slight nod, as he was still flat on his back with a heavy man

mostly pinning him to the bed. “I just need to be very, very careful.”

“I know, baby. I don’t out people against their will. I was trained to withstand torture. No one’s

getting information from me.”

He smiled, but the expression looked forced and didn’t show in his eyes. Vlad wanted to ask him

if he’d ever been tortured. There were various small and large scars on the man, including one that
looked like a bullet hole, but Vlad had a lot of scars too, not from torture, but from playing and even
horsing around as a kid, so maybe they didn’t all come from Joey’s time in the military. Plus, Vlad did
understand about confidentiality—it was practically how he’d lived his life from the beginning.

“Let’s go to sleep.”
“You okay without a top sheet? Someone got spunk all over yours.”
“Come here.” Vlad opened his arms, and Joey spooned into him. I could get used to this.

Chapter Six

Joe rolled over and encountered a large lump. What the fuck? He turned his head and opened one

eye. Oh, Vlad. The man had flung an arm out to the side, and Joe had just landed on it. Smiling, he
scooted away and studied the still-sleeping figure in front of him. Fucking gorgeous.

Idly he thought about surprising Vlad with a morning blowjob, but his bladder nixed the idea for

the moment. After taking care of his immediate need, he sneaked back into bed. Given his training, he
wasn’t worried about waking the guy up, but the thought of Vlad being none the wiser gave him a little
kick. Gently, he moved the blanket away from Vlad’s leg to get a look at the bruise.

Shit. I’ve seen shrapnel hits that looked better. If he thinks he’s getting back on the ice in a game

or two, I’m pretty sure he’s mistaken.

His gaze wandered up to the morning wood lying against Vlad’s stomach. The whole “waking

him up with a blowjob” thing was sounding better and better. Besides, maybe it would soften the blow
of seeing what his ankle looked like. Joe had to be at work later, only for a half shift to cover for a
buddy, so unfortunately he couldn’t spend all day licking up and down the man’s body like he was a
life-size ice-cream cone. It was really a shame. A physique like Vlad’s was meant to be worshipped.

Not like he needed a reason or justification to stuff Vlad’s fat cock in his mouth. Mind made up,

Joe moved down the bed and began to gently lick and suck at the head of Vlad’s cock. Mmm, he tasted
good. He watched Vlad and knew the moment he became conscious. He took him deep, and Vlad lifted
his ass right off the bed.

“Fuck me.”
Pulling off with a pop, Joe said, “Later.”
Vlad finally opened his eyes. “Today?”
“I thought today maybe you could wear one of the plugs you have, since we never got to that last

night.” Vlad reached down and ran his fingers through his short hair.

“I want you inside me today.”
Joe studied him, sighing. “I’m not sure you’re ready, baby. The last thing I want to do is hurt you

or turn you off to bottoming.”

“Can you find my prostate with your cock?” Vlad asked, both blond eyebrows going up.
He laughed. “Of course.”
“I want you to fuck me. I want it right now.”
“Hold on there, slugger. Someone wore me out last night, and I’m not as young as I used to be. I

need breakfast before I can consider any hardcore bedroom gymnastics.”

“Fine. I suppose I should feed you.”
Vlad looked at him with a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth, and Joe waited him out,

smirking back.

“I keep lots of things here. We have to eat a good breakfast. Do you like eggs? I can make a

really good omelet. I tried over and over until it came out right. Took me almost a year.”

“You keep forgetting you’re not supposed to be on your feet.”
“You’re worse than my trainer.”
Joe threw him an exasperated look. It really was amazing how much professional athletes were

like military men. “I want you to heal.”

“Can I at least take a shower?” Vlad asked, sitting up. “I feel kind of sticky and gross.”

“A short one,” he answered, choosing not to react to Vlad’s choice of words. “I’ll go root around

for breakfast stuff.”

“Wait for me. I will make food after I get out.”
Joe cocked his head. “What’s with this ‘I don’t want to let anyone do something nice for me’

attitude? Or are you afraid to let me look around your kitchen? Got a body buried in there? Or a
woman hiding in the pantry?”

“No, God, no.” Vlad looked down, picking at an imaginary spot on the blanket. “I-I’m not used to

people taking care of me. And my mother…”

His voice cracked on the last word, and Joe reached out, offering silent support. Vlad cleared his

throat.

“My mother taught me to be a good host. She made all the big dinners for our family parties and

stuff.”

“Do you miss them?”
The other man shrugged, but it was obviously not something he took casually. “Yeah, but I’ve

only been back to Russia four times since I came over here to play. And my parents won’t come here.
They pushed for me to come to North America to play, but they won’t leave Russia.”

“Did they ever say why?”
“They do not feel comfortable. They don’t speak English at all, and since I’m the youngest, they

are already in their sixties. My father says they are too old to travel. I send them and the rest of my
family some money to make their lives easier, but I do not think they’ll ever see me play
professionally.”

“So they’ve never seen you play in the NHL?” Joe was incredulous. It wasn’t like his family was

going to sit around the campfire and sing “Kumbaya,” but if Joe were a professional athlete, they’d
sure as hell figure out a way to get to a game. One game was not much to ask at all in his opinion.

“What about the Olympics? Did they go to Switzerland?”
“No.”
Joe shifted until he could take Vlad in his arms. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be prying.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not. And I’m sorry. It’s none of my business.”
Vlad shrugged again. “It is what it is. And considering what Russia is doing with guys like us, I

doubt I will ever visit again.”

“Yeah, those laws are pretty shitty. I’ve been watching the news.”
“I am going to take my shower now. You really don’t have to make breakfast, though.”
“Will you stop? I want to. It’ll give me an excuse to carb-load you for our later activities.” Joe

frowned. “I do have to work from four to eight, though.”

“I want to watch the team play tonight. I will stay here, but I do want to see the game.”
“Do you, um, want some company, or would you rather be alone?” Vlad gave him a soft smile,

and Joe couldn’t resist leaning in to kiss his beautiful mouth.

“I would love to have you here at my place, but I feel like you are spending all your time with

me.”

“And that’s a bad thing why?”
Pulling away, Vlad mumbled, “You’ll get sick of me.”
Joe snorted. “Babe, I could fuck you and be fucked by you for a thousand years and never get sick

of it. Besides, we’re getting to know each other, and at least some of our time should be out of the
bedroom.”

“If we have to.”
Vlad heaved a sigh, but he was smiling again, and Joe was glad he hadn’t totally brought the guy

down.  He  was  trying  to  understand  Vlad—where  he  came  from,  his  thoughts  on  life  now—and  not
knowing  anything  about  his  family  definitely  made  puzzling  him  out  more  difficult.  Of  course,  he
hadn’t exactly rambled on and on  about  his  own  family,  but  it  seemed  like  Vlad’s  was  important  to
him, whereas Joe’s feelings ran more toward the “we’re in the same family but don’t need to live out
of each other’s pockets” mentality.

He watched Vlad walk, or rather, limp, to the bathroom, his eyes glued on his completely perfect,

tight little bubble butt. Sometimes he wished he wasn’t so honorable, because he’d love to sink his
cock into the man’s waiting warmth, but Vlad was new to all this and needed more than the couple of
fingers he’d given him last night before he’d be ready to take Joe’s dick. And no matter how much Joe
wanted it, he wouldn’t rush the other man, even when Vlad himself tried to sabotage the plan.

Locating his jeans in the hallway, Joe pulled them on sans underwear. Why bother, since they

were coming off after breakfast anyway? He wandered downstairs to the kitchen and opened the
fridge. Wow, the guy wasn’t kidding. The fridge was full; Joe could eat for a week with the contents it
contained. He closed the door and then opened a cabinet to what he assumed was the pantry. Also
loaded. He recalled Russia still often experienced shortages, even after the fall of communism, and he
wondered if Vlad was unconsciously stocking up. He would imagine that kind of thing would be hard
to let go of.

After assessing what he had to work with, Joe pulled out English muffins, cheese, ham, and eggs.

He loved Egg McMuffins, and given the opportunity to copy them was a breakfast idea he could get
behind. Hopefully this wouldn’t mess with whatever Vlad’s in-season diet was, but hey, the guy had
all this stuff in the fridge—surely he intended to eat it at some point. Just perhaps not in this particular
configuration.

He got busy scrambling the eggs, since he didn’t have one of those round things McDonald’s

used to put the egg inside, while he warmed the ham up in the microwave. After the eggs were done,
he slid the ham into the pan and gave it a little color, and then went about assembling the sandwiches,
finding plates right in front of him in the cabinet.

Joe heard Vlad coming down the stairs, one light step and one heavier one as Vlad tried to keep

weight off his injured ankle. When he arrived in the kitchen, he heaved himself onto a stool in just his
sweat shorts.

“You made all of this while I was in the shower?”
“It wasn’t hard. Can you eat it? I figured if you had all the stuff in your fridge, it was okay. I

assume you guys are supposed to eat healthy, but this really isn’t bad.”

Pretending to study it, Vlad said, “Carbs, protein, delicious. Yes, I can eat it.”
Joe pushed the plate toward him with a smile. “I made coffee. Or would you like juice? I noticed

you had some orange juice in there.”

“Both, please.” Vlad bit into the sandwich and groaned. “I think I will keep you,” Vlad said

around the mouthful.

“Glad my skills are good for something.”
He swallowed and took a drink of the juice Joe handed him. “Oh, they are.”
Joe poured them both coffees. “Do you take anything in yours?”

“Milk.”
Joe grabbed it from the fridge and handed it over. “I’ll let you do up your own coffee. I hate it

when people screw mine up, though I’ll drink it black too. When we were lucky enough to get coffee
in the sandbox, it was usually black and thick as mud. Not a creamer or a sugar packet in sight.”

“Eww…not a very nice picture.”
Vlad made a face, and Joe tried not to laugh. Considering where the guy had grown up, Joe was a

little surprised at his reaction.

“It’s the military life.”
“I am so glad my hockey playing meant I didn’t have to do my required time in the Russian

military. My brothers did. I never agreed with the politics of the country anyway, so being part of
something I did not believe in wasn’t something I was excited to do.”

“I understand.” He recalled some of the hellholes he’d been to during his time in Delta Force. Joe

had seen the worst of the worst. Sometimes he was shocked he hadn’t come out the other side more
screwed up than he was.

“Hey, Joey.” Vlad waved his hand in front of his face.
Joe blinked. “What?”
“Where did you go? You stopped eating and were staring off into nothing.”
“Just remembering some things I’d rather forget.”
“Do you…” Vlad’s Adam’s apple bobbed, but he persevered. “Do you have that thing soldiers

sometimes battle with when they get back from being overseas? Where they have nightmares and
stuff?”

“Actually, no. I mean, occasionally I’ll dream about something, but do I go apeshit when a car

backfires? No. Do I think I’m being watched all the time? No. I’m pretty okay. Considering my
background, I consider myself pretty lucky to have escaped with my sanity intact at all.”

“Yes, that’s good.” Vlad popped the last bite of his sandwich into his mouth. “Eat yours. It’s

getting cold. I am going to make a protein shake. I have to keep the weight on, but I can’t do it with
junk food, or it’ll be like I have sand in my skates. Hockey is so calorie intensive most of us can’t
maintain our muscle without these.” He pulled a blender toward him and proceeded to get out a can.

“How many of those things do you have to drink in a day? We used them for a similar reason.

Those freaking packs were heavy, and of course, in the sandbox you were always sweating like a
motherfucker. When we had access to them, we were choking down a couple a day at least. It’s not
like there’s workout equipment around to help keep our physique fit.”

“If my weight starts to get too low, I might do up to four a day.” Joe grimaced. “I think the ones I

have probably taste better than anything the military would ever give you.” He showed Joe the
canister.

“Cookies and cream? Are you kidding me?”
“No, and it tastes just like a cookies and cream milkshake.”
“Well, shit, yeah, your stuff is a fuckton better than anything we ever got.”
Vlad put the shake together and held it out to Joe. “Try it.”
Joe took a sip, not wanting to mess up Vlad’s dietary requirements for the stuff. “Wow, it’s really

good.”

“Yeah. I have four flavors and go back and forth between them so I don’t get bored.”
“Lucky. Ours were vanilla and smelled and even tasted like a candle store had thrown up in the

can. The ones we got were already mixed.”

“I do these with almond milk. They taste better, and I get more calcium.”
“Look at you, Mr. Professional Athlete. I bet you know tons of shit about diet and stuff, huh?”
Vlad blushed, and Joe grinned. It was hard to believe he’d ever look at a guy of Vlad’s stature and

musculature and think he was cute, but he did. Joe nearly jumped the man right then and there, but if
Vlad needed this protein shake, Joe wasn’t going to get in the way. He could wait. His dick jumped
when Vlad smoothed a hand down his taut stomach as he chugged the creamy concoction.

“I have been on a special diet since I got here, so yes, I have learned many things.” He looked Joe

up and down. “But you don’t look like you need to do anything different.”

Now Joe felt his own face flame and turned away with a little smile creeping up the corners of his

mouth. He grabbed the two plates and filled the sink with water and soap, then quickly washed them
and the frying pan. Vlad finished his shake, and Joe took the tumbler from him and washed it as well,
feeling oddly domestic. He’d only met the man a few weeks ago, but he could see this being the new
norm in his life. And he liked it.

Of course, Vlad wasn’t out, so living together—if they ever got to that stage—might be out of the

realm of possibility, but Joy couldn’t imagine wanting a lot of time away from this man.

Vlad slowly made his way back up the stairs after planting a kiss on the side of Joe’s head. Joe

definitely needed a shower. He was glad he always carried spare clothing in his Jeep. It was a holdover
from his military days, when he needed to be ready to move at a moment’s notice. Joe jogged outside
and grabbed his duffel bag. As he returned to the house, his gaze swept the area.

The need to check for safety/security had been ingrained in him, and even now, months later, he

couldn’t stop doing it. There was no one outside, and he didn’t have that weird prickly feeling he’d
always gotten when there were enemy combatants around. He shook his head, smiled, and reentered
Vlad’s place.

Once back upstairs, he got into the shower and began to soap up, debating whether or not he

should tell Vlad about Brendan. What he and Brendan had was far from a sure thing—they’d been
little more than friends and fuck buddies. Joe groaned. He needed to come clean with Vlad if Brendan
was coming back into his life in any capacity, but how? The whole thing had happened before Joe had
even met Vlad, but now he didn’t know what Brendan’s expectations were, and he didn’t want Vlad to
be blindsided.

With a sigh, he turned off the water. He couldn’t hide in the shower all day. After drying off, Joe

threw on some clothes and went into the bedroom. Vlad was back in bed and seemingly naked, based
on the large amount of skin exposed as he reclined, waiting for Joe. Swallowing thickly, Joe sat on the
end of the bed. Vlad’s eyebrows drew down.

“What’s wrong?”
Joe forced himself to look at Vlad and said, “I need to talk to you about something.”
“Okay.”
“Before I met you—long before—I was, for lack of a better word, involved with another man. It

started when we were stationed together. Brendan is scheduled to end his last deployment in a few
weeks, and I’m not sure what he’s expecting. We never really talked about a future before I got hurt
and was shipped home. I guess I’d call us fuck buddies, scratching an itch while we were both stuck
over there.”

“So what are you saying?”
Joe ran a hand through his hair, blowing out a loud breath. “I don’t even know. I just—I didn’t

think it was right you didn’t know about Brendan.”

“Are you going to date him when he gets back?”
“He wants to come see me once he’s finished with all the paperwork crap you have to go through

before you can be released.”

Vlad nodded slowly. “Where does that leave me? What about us?”
“I don’t know. It’s up to you.”
The other man sat up. “You don’t know? Up to me? Why did you get with me if you were already

with someone else?”

Joe winced inwardly. He couldn’t blame Vlad for being angry. If the tables were turned, he would

be too. “We really aren’t together, Brendan and I. And I got caught up—”

“Bullshit.”
“At first it was, because you were obviously so scared. I remembered how I felt and wanted to

help you. I didn’t think there was anything wrong with that, since as far as I was concerned, I was
single. Like I said, Brendan and I never discussed being a couple. But I remembered what it was like
to be alone and in the closet, and I wanted to do what I could to help.” Vlad gave a snort of derision,
and Joe looked away.

“So I was…something you did for charity? Is that why you sucked my cock? Why you kissed

me? Why you let me fuck you?”

“You know it wasn’t.”
“No, I do not know.” Climbing out of bed, Vlad grabbed a pair of sweats and tugged them on.

“You should leave.”

“I want you to understand—”
Vlad whirled to face him. “I understand. You used me to get off before your real boyfriend

returned. All the stuff you said. I was starting to believe maybe we could have something. It was all
lies.”

“It wasn’t. Brendan and I—”
“Leave.” Vlad got in his face, but Joey stood his ground.
“I never meant to hurt you,” he whispered.
Vlad backed off. “You did. Now you should go.”
“If you want.”
“You think any of this is what I want?” Vlad’s hand slashed the air. “You think I am happy I

finally found a guy I felt comfortable enough with to share my first sexual experiences, and he turns
out to be a cheater?”

“Brendan and I only had a physical relationship while I was overseas.” He felt like he was talking

to a brick wall. How could he make Vlad understand?

“Well, that makes all the difference. Because you and I have so much more.”
Sarcasm dripped off the man’s tongue, and Joe closed his eyes. He wasn’t surprised Vlad was

reacting like this, but he wished he could make him realize he wasn’t throwing Vlad over for Brendan.
Joey felt more of a connection to Vlad than he ever had to Brendan, but it didn’t feel right to contact
Brendan right at the end of his deployment and say, “Oh, by the way. I found someone else.”

“We do have something more.” Joey rose. “If we didn’t, you wouldn’t be this angry.”
“So what’s the plan? Are you going to be with him?”
“I’d actually like to tell him about you, so he knows there’s no chance of him and me becoming a

couple. But if there’s nothing here—”

“You would?”
Vlad’s facial expression was almost comical, but Joe had a feeling now would be a bad time to

smile or laugh.

“Why? You knew him before me.”
“Like I said, he and I had a physical connection. If I had been pining away for Brendan or in love

with the guy, I wouldn’t have done anything with you but offer friendship. You may not believe it
now, but I really am not that much of an asshole.”

Shoulders slumping, Vlad stared at the floor. “I know.”
“Then believe me. Let me figure out what to do with Brendan. I can’t just call him up a couple of

weeks before he hits stateside and tell him he’s got nothing to come back to. I don’t even know if he
wants anything, but telling him no right now doesn’t seem fair.”

“You are right. It’s not.”
Finally Vlad looked up, and Joe could kick his own ass for putting the lost puppy look in the

man’s eyes.

“But until you do something, I can’t trust you.”
“I understand. Do you want me to go?”
Vlad snorted. “No. I changed my mind. I want to pound the hell out of your ass, right now. No

way am I letting you into mine now, but I’m horny, and I think this is the least you can do.”

“You want—”
“To fuck you again? Yes.” Vlad jerked his head toward the bed. “Take off your pants and get on

your hands and knees. I want your ass. I am going to fuck you hard and fast unless you say no.”

Where was this coming from? He’d known Vlad was angry, but he’d never seen this side of the

man—the man who knew what he wanted and intended to take it. Shit, it was pretty hot, even if it was
being done out of anger. Man, I am so messed up.

Joe glanced toward the bed. If Vlad wanted this, Joe was all for it. He removed his sweatpants

and left them on the floor before peeling his T-shirt off and turning away, situating himself with his
ass offered up.

“I won’t do this if you are not into it.”
Vlad knelt behind him, sliding his large hands onto Joe’s hips and gripping tightly. No doubt Joe

would have marks.

“Take me. Take what you need.”
“Stay there.”
Vlad awkwardly scooted across the bed to get the condoms and lube from the nightstand and

came  back  to  kneel  behind  him.  Joe  was  afraid  to  turn  around,  not  sure  what  Vlad  would  do,  so  he
stared  straight  at  the  headboard  in  front  of  him.  The  condom  wrapper  crinkled,  shortly  being
accompanied  by  the  lube  cap  opening  with  a  soft  click.  Cold  lube  hit  the  outside  of  his  hole,  and
almost immediately Vlad’s thankfully lubed cock began to slide inside, seating him to the balls in one
quick  stroke.  Joe  would’ve  let  Vlad  take  him  with  no  lube—he  felt  so  fucking  guilty—but  was
thankful at least the other man had slicked himself up. He didn’t have time to think further as Vlad
grabbed his hips again and, true to his word, thrust in and out of his hole with almost violent motions.

Joe had never had angry sex, but damn if Vlad wasn’t hotter than hell like this. He still thought

fighting just so you could have this kind of sex was taking things a little too far, but he could

definitely see the appeal of it. He knew Vlad wouldn’t truly hurt him. It wasn’t in his nature.

Soon Vlad’s balls were slapping against Joey’s ass as he fucked him harder and harder, grunting

with each in-stroke. If possible, his grip tightened even more, and Joe grimaced. Vlad worked him
hard, slamming in and out of Joe’s tight channel, and after a few moments, the younger man came
with a coarse shout. Joe hadn’t had a similar release, unfortunately. When he looked down, his dick
was only at half-mast and didn’t look to be fighting for more.

Vlad pulled out quickly, and Joe turned to see him heading for the bathroom. “Call me if you fix

your problem.” The door slammed shut, and Joe sighed. Climbing off the bed, he knew he’d be sore
for a couple of days. But he’d given Vlad permission to use him. Strangely, the guilt still weighed him
down. He’d thought maybe if Vlad had taken him, it would lessen, but his heart was tight in his chest.

He hadn’t been fair to Vlad. He hadn’t been fair to Brendan. And now he was paying for it. After

slipping his sweats back on, Joe grabbed his bag and went downstairs to put on his shoes and coat. He
didn’t have to be at work for hours yet, and he assumed the offer to come over after his shift was done
had been revoked. He suddenly found himself at odds. How had this happened?

Joe drove home and took a fitful nap before work. After his shift, he stopped at the store for a six-

pack. When he got home, he flopped down on the couch, letting out a little yelp as his sore ass took
the brunt of his weight. The hockey game was only half over, but Joe turned the channel, unwilling to
become one of those pathetic, pining bastards. Finding an old action movie, he sat back and watched
for a few minutes.

Glancing at his phone lying on the table in front of him, Joe debated contacting Brendan. No way

would he tell Brendan about Vlad until he could talk to the guy face-to-face, but it felt like he should
at least check in. It had been a while since he’d last made contact. Even a quick e-mail would be better
than nothing. He picked up the phone, opened his e-mail app, and wrote:

Hey, bud. Just making sure everything’s still on target for you to get out. Ready to take your toys

and go home yet? Take care and see you soon.

Joe
He hit Send and then lay back against the couch. By the time a half hour had passed, his first beer

was settling in his belly like a lead weight. But Joe kept drinking, not even stopping to grab a late
dinner. He hadn’t eaten since breakfast and knew he’d have a bitch of a hangover tomorrow, but he
deserved everything he got.

It was nearly two a.m. when Joe woke on the couch. Five empty bottles were strewn about the

coffee table, and when he rolled to the side to sit up, his belly lurched. “Fuck!” He barely made it to
the bathroom before he threw up the meager contents of his stomach. The room swam in front of him.
Finally he stumbled to his room, grabbed the wastebasket, and placed it by the side of the bed. He fell
back to sleep, waking once more when the phone rang.

“What the—” He focused bleary eyes on the alarm clock, trying to ignore the cheerful sunlight

streaming in through the window and slicing his skull in half. Nine? Shit, he had to be at work at ten.
Joe rose and immediately made a grab for the dresser in front of him. Maybe work was a bad idea
today. The damn phone was still ringing, but where was it? After nearly taking a header off the closet
door, Joe located it on his dresser. Vlad. He had no idea what to think but answered the call. “Hello?”

“Um, hey.”
“Hey.” He sat down heavily on the bed, feeling a twinge in his ass still. Vlad had really done a

number on him.

“I…called to apologize. I acted like a baby, and on top of that, treated you so badly. Fuck, I

practically raped you. I’m sorry. I was mad and hurt. Please don’t hate me.” His voice cracked on the

last word. “How are you feeling this morning?”

“I’ll live,” Joe said with a short laugh. Man, Vlad sounded devastated. Joe was such an asshole.

“If the hangover doesn’t kill me.”

“I thought you said you don’t handle alcohol well, so you watch how much you drink?”
“I didn’t last night, hence the hangover. I was supposed to be at work in an hour, but I’m gonna

call in. No way can I be hauling around parts today. They really don’t like their workers puking on
their expensive machinery.”

“Can I, um…?”
Joe heard Vlad take a deep, shaky breath and let it back out.
“Can I come see you? If you are not in the mood, I can wait, but I need to say I’m sorry in person.

I feel terrible. I can’t believe I acted so badly. You’ve been so great to me, and at the first sign of
anything wrong, I became a total dick.”

Joe still wasn’t sure he hadn’t gotten everything he’d deserved, but he didn’t say anything. “It’s

fine, Vlad. You didn’t break me. In fact, I, um, I liked it.”

“Really? How could you? I never should have done that. Please. Please let me make it up to you.”
The more the man begged, the worse Joe felt. “Seriously, you really don’t have to. I’m not lively

company right now. I have a raging headache, and a family of rodents seems to have taken up
residence in my belly.”

“Excuse me?”
“My stomach hurts.”
“Oh. American sayings…”
Joe smiled a little. “Yeah, there are a lot of weird ones.”
“I understand if you do not want to see me.”
“Not an issue.”
“Let me come over. My teammate is bringing me to the arena on his way to practice, and I will

pick up my car. I could stop by after, maybe bring you some food. You should eat.”

Joe grunted. He was sure food was an excellent idea, but the thought didn’t excite him. “Sure.

That would be nice. It’ll give me a chance to take a long, hot shower to clear my head.”

“I will text you when I am ready to leave the arena, and you can tell me what you would like me

to bring.”

“I’m sure anything is fine. I have no idea how much I’ll actually eat.”
“I will text anyway. Now go take a shower. You will feel better.”
“See you in a while.”
After calling in sick to work, Joe forced himself to drink a glass of orange juice and got into the

shower. By the time he climbed out, he was feeling slightly more human, and after drying off and
wrapping a towel around his waist, he took his phone into the living room to wait for Vlad’s text. His
phone pinged, and he picked it up, thinking it was Vlad. His heart skipped a beat when he saw it was a
return e-mail from Brendan instead.

Hey bud—On target to wrap up here. Do you mind if I don’t come to Pittsburgh? I think I want to

just put this whole crappy time behind me and find someone to be happy with—someone who hasn’t
seen the shit we have. I hope you understand. I don’t want to hurt you, but I really think it’s best this
way. Good luck with everything, and thanks for having my back.

Brendan

Joe hadn’t seen that coming, but Brendan’s e-mail solved a whole bunch of issues for him. He

couldn’t blame Brendan for feeling like he did. If they’d gotten together, it would’ve been harder to
put the past behind them. Even now, with all the hours Joe was spending with Vlad, he thought less
about his time overseas, and he was sure Brendan would be better off without him around as a
reminder of their shitty time in the service.

He began to type.
Brendan, I completely understand. I hope you’re able to find somebody, and I’m here if you need

a friend. Be safe.

Joe
Joe fell asleep and woke to the notification sound going off on his phone. It was Vlad, asking him

what he wanted for lunch. He texted back before closing his eyes again, mostly to block out the
increasing light. It would’ve been smarter to get up and close the blinds, but he was feeling
exceptionally lazy.

A short time later, the doorbell rang, and Joe groaned. When had his doorbell started to sound

like a gong?

Rising, he shuffled over to unlock the door. Vlad’s eyes widened as his gaze swept him up and

down, and Joe realized he’d never gotten dressed. “Sorry about that. I took my shower and fell asleep
on the couch. I can go get dressed. Come in.”

Vlad entered, tossing his coat on the rack near the door. “Don’t do it for me. I enjoy looking at

you.”

He offered a tentative smile, which Joe returned. Vlad set a bag down on the coffee table and

stuffed his hands in his pockets with that task completed.

Well, this isn’t awkward at all.
“I’ll just go get some plates and stuff.” Joe went into the kitchen and planted his hands on the

counter, blowing out a loud breath. His cock began to fill, and Joe leaned down, resting his forehead
on one of his arms. What was he gonna do?

“Are you all right? Are you feeling sick?”
Joe slowly straightened and turned. “No. I’m feeling like a complete asshole.”
Vlad’s eyebrows drew down. “I thought about everything after you left. Actually, I did not sleep

much. You didn’t owe me any explanation about your friend. We’ve only been seeing each other for a
couple of weeks, and I had no right to be angry that you did not tell me about him.”

“That’s nice of you to say, but you should know he just sent me an e-mail saying he doesn’t want

to see me when he gets back.”

“Really?”
“Yeah, he said he wants to put his time in the military in the past, and being with someone like

me who was there with him would make that impossible.”

Vlad nodded. “It makes sense. And I can’t say I am sorry he feels that way.”
The strong sense of relief Joe felt had him leaning back against the counter. Vlad didn’t hate him.

Even his hangover was relegated to the back of his mind.

“So we’re okay?”
“We’re great.”
Joe dropped to his knees. He still felt nauseated but needed to set things right again. “Let me

show you how great I think you are.”

“You don’t have to—”
“Fuck, Vlad, I want to. I want you.”
Groaning, Vlad shifted his weight as he looked down at Joe. “I did not come here for this. I just

wanted to apologize.”

“I know. Let me make you feel good.” He reached for the button of Vlad’s jeans, and the younger

man sucked in a breath.

After he worked the stubborn button free, Joe slid the zipper down and pushed both the denim and

Vlad’s boxer briefs below his delectable ass. He’d still love to be the first one to take Vlad, but given
their current situation, he would move slowly. Vlad’s balls came into view, and Joe leaned down and
tilted his head so he could gently suck one into his mouth.

“Ot Yabis!”
Joe pulled back with a laugh. “What the hell does that mean?”
“Um, holy fuck, more or less. You surprised me.” Vlad’s grin was sheepish. “I don’t usually go

back to Russian, but I did not expect what you did.”

Joe reached up and hooked his hand around the back of the man’s neck to pull him down for a

kiss. “I’m sure you don’t want to hear this, but you’re fucking adorable,” he said when they broke
apart. He took a light hold of Vlad’s shaft.

“Adorable? Puppies are adorable.”
Joe was sure Vlad didn’t realize it, but the knitted eyebrows and frown made him even cuter.

Probably not a good idea to mention at the moment, so instead he smiled and leaned down again.

“Let’s see if we can get you to say some other interesting things.” He took Vlad’s hard and

already leaking cock into his mouth and kept moving down the shaft until the wiry hairs at the base
tickled his nose. He had to go slow and concentrate so he didn’t make himself sick, but this was
important. Vlad needed to know how much Joe wanted him, needed him. He swallowed around Vlad’s
cockhead, wrapping an arm around the other man’s legs when he swayed. He pulled away and looked
up. “Baby, sit down. I can’t believe I didn’t even think about that. You’re gonna hurt your ankle.”

“What ankle?”
Joe pulled a kitchen chair over. “Sit.”
Vlad frowned. “You cannot be comfortable on the floor.”
“I’m fine.” Once Vlad was seated, Joe worked him in earnest, using his hand in counterpoint to

his mouth and listening as Vlad switched between Russian and English swear words. He pulled away
long enough to say, “Can’t decide what language to use?”

“I think in English, but right now, my brain is like oatmeal.”
“Oatmeal?”
“You know what I mean.”
“Mmm.” Joe returned to sucking Vlad’s cock, now using his second hand to gently massage

Vlad’s balls. It wasn’t long before Vlad gasped and spilled warm, sticky seed into Joe’s mouth.
Humming, Joe took it all. Strangely, it seemed to ease some of the sickliness he felt.

“So good,” Vlad said with a sigh. “Now my brains are worse than oatmeal. They are totally

gone.”

“I guess it’s true what they say about a man thinking with his dick.”
Vlad looked down at him. “You would know.”
“I would, yes.”

Chapter Seven

Once Vlad had put himself back together, he and Joey went out to Joey’s living room and settled

on opposite ends of the couch. He’d brought several baked goods, figuring everybody liked those.
Much as he himself would enjoy one of the chocolate-chip muffins as big as his head, he took out the
fruit salad he’d also purchased and offered some to Joey, who shook his head, instead choosing an
obscenely large cinnamon roll.

“How did you know I love cinnamon rolls?”
Joey took a bite and moaned. Vlad’s dick made a good effort to twitch at the sound, but since it

had only been five minutes since he’d shot down Joey’s throat, not much was happening below the
belt.

“I didn’t. So I also brought muffins and doughnuts.”
“Really?” Joey peered into the bag and licked his lips.
Is he trying to kill me?
“I’m gonna get fat if I eat all these.”
Vlad snorted. “I don’t think you need to worry. But they are all yours—I can’t start eating things

like that, or I’ll be overweight when I get back on the ice.”

“If I eat all these, you’re gonna have to help me work off the calories.” Joey grinned.
I want him.
Reaching over, Vlad used the pad of his thumb to wipe a smidge of white icing off Joey’s chin.

Grinning, he pushed the digit into Joey’s mouth, his eyes rolling into the back of his head when it was
thoroughly cleaned by a wicked tongue. It was amazing how much the icing on a cinnamon bun looked
like cum.

“Oh, I will help you. I am very focused on fitness.”
“Quite obviously the case. But I’d be able to see it better if you took off your shirt.”
Rolling his eyes, Vlad did as Joey bade.
“Eat your food and then come here.”
The fruit salad vanished quickly. Rising, Vlad went and stood in front of him.
“Straddle me and don’t feed me any more bullshit about how you’ll hurt me. Remember the

whole ‘a hundred ways to kill someone with my bare hands’ thing I mentioned the other day? I’m a
deadly weapon, baby.”

With a chuckle, Vlad lowered himself onto Joey’s thighs. “Yes, of course you are. Now what?”
“Now I make you my dessert.”
Joey pulled him closer, then kissed and licked the exposed skin of his chest. When Joey lightly

bit down on his nipple, Vlad cried out. Why does that feel so good?

“You like?”
He did it again, and Vlad could only grunt in agreement. The torment continued until finally Vlad

leaned back. “Fuck me.”

Joey’s eyebrows shot up. “Now?”
Rocking forward, Vlad rubbed against the erection straining the towel Joey was still clad in.

“Yes, now. I know you want to.”

“Fuck, babe, it’s not a matter of want. Of course I want to. But are you sure? I mean—”

Before Joey could beat himself up more for the previous evening’s events, Vlad put a finger over

his lips. “I am sure. I want you to fuck me.”

Joey’s head fell back against the couch cushions, and Vlad rocked over him again, eliciting a

strangled groan from him.

“Killing me.”
“Give me what I want.”
He’d had a lot of time to think about this overnight. Vlad hadn’t been lying when he’d said sleep

had  eluded  him. Almost  as  soon  as  Joey  had  left  the  night  before,  Vlad  had  wanted  to  call  him  and
apologize,  but  he  wasn’t  sure  what  kind  of  reception  he’d  get.  As  he’d  lain  there,  he  could  hardly
believe  he’d  made  such  a  dick  move.  Others  would  perhaps  blame  it  on  their  inexperience  with
relationships, but Vlad wasn’t about to let himself off so easily. The way he looked at it, he had more
to make up to Joey than the other way around.

Joey cupped Vlad’s face. “I want you to be sure about this. As in absolutely, positively, sure. If

there’s even a shadow of a doubt in your mind—”

Vlad turned and kissed Joey’s hand. “There isn’t. I want you to be my first.”
“Fuck.”
“That is the idea, yes.”
“Let’s go upstairs. You deserve to have your first time in a nice, soft bed.”
As Vlad rose, he asked, “Where was yours?”
Joey made a face as he stood. “Well, I was tipsy, which I believe we’ve established is not a good

thing for me. It was at a party, and the guy was older. I don’t think he was trying to take advantage of
me or anything. And I didn’t tell him I was a virgin. Like don’t ask, don’t tell in the military, he didn’t
ask, and I didn’t tell. I was on leave, and I just wanted it over with. He fucked me on a back porch
while the party continued inside.”

Vlad couldn’t help putting his arms around Joey, who, after a moment’s hesitation, returned the

gesture. “I’m sorry it was not a better experience for you. Maybe I was blessed to not accept being gay
until now. I never thought I would say so, but perhaps it’s true.”

Joey gave Vlad a crooked smile. “I don’t want you to get your hopes up too much. I’ve never had

any complaints, but…”

“Everything you do to me feels so good. I am sure this will be incredible.”
Joey led him upstairs. “Make yourself comfortable. I’m going to take a couple of ibuprofen for

my headache, now that I’m sure I’m not going to puke them back up. Be right back.”

Vlad wasn’t sure if he should take the rest of his clothes off. He decided to let Joey do things at

his own pace. Lying back on the bed, he folded his arms behind his head and waited. Joey came back
out of the bathroom, licking his lips.

“If you don’t stop doing sexy things with your mouth I might attack it.”
Joey smirked. “And supposedly you think I’ll stop then?”
“You drive me crazy.” He grabbed Joey as soon as he was close enough, and Joey fell over him.

He gave a surprised huff. “Oh, I like this.” The towel was askew from the way Joey had fallen,
exposing one well-muscled ass cheek. Amused, Vlad brought his hand down hard, leaving a bright red
handprint. “Yeah, I like this.”

“Um, ow.”
Vlad snorted. “That did not hurt, you big baby. What do you keep bragging about? Delta Force

bad-ass? Trained to withstand torture and all?” He slapped the same cheek again, and, with a growl,
Joey rolled away. The towel came completely off in the process, and Vlad raised an eyebrow at the
erection tilting toward Joey’s stomach. “I can see how much you didn’t enjoy yourself.”

“I was thinking more about what was going to happen a little later.”
“Right…”
Joey straddled him, holding Vlad’s arms down at his sides. If he’d wanted to, he probably

could’ve gotten away from him, but why would he want to? A hot, naked guy was restraining him.
Life could be worse.

“How about you get me ready?”
“You are holding me down. What exactly are you expecting me to do in this position?”
“Hmm.” Joey pretended to consider, and Vlad waited him out. “I guess I could move.” He jerked

his chin toward Vlad’s head. “You can stay right there.” Letting go of Vlad’s arms, Joey resituated
himself on Vlad’s chest, the tip of his cock bouncing on Vlad’s chin. “Suck me.”

He guided his dick into Vlad’s open mouth and sank in balls-deep with a sigh. Vlad was pretty

proud even after only a short time he could already take the entire length of Joey’s cock. He greedily
licked and sucked. Joey grabbed the headboard with both hands and began to fuck Vlad’s mouth.

“Getting. Too. Fucking. Good. At. This.”
Each word was punctuated by another thrust, and then Joey withdrew. “I’m not gonna last, and I

definitely want to.” He looked at Vlad. “Are you still sure you want to do this?”

“Yes.”
Joey threw his leg over Vlad until he was kneeling at his side. “There are, uh, a couple of ways to

do this.”

“Okay… Pretty sure I know them, but go ahead.”
“I can lube up my fingers and stretch you.” Vlad nodded, and Joey continued. “I can rim you.”

Vlad bit his lip, and Joey smiled. “Looks like the idea maybe intrigues you?”

“I’ve never done it.”
“Up on your hands and knees.”
Vlad asked, “Should I take off the rest of my clothes?”
“Hmm, good point. I’ll take care of this obvious problem.”
True to Joey’s word, a moment later Vlad was naked.
“Now get on your hands and knees. Watch your ankle.”
Not wanting to appear like an overeager puppy, Vlad took his time rolling over.
“Spread your legs more, baby.”
He did, and Joey spread his cheeks, blowing hot air over Vlad’s pucker.
“Yeah, so sexy.”
“If you say so.” Vlad’s voice was already shaky, and Joey had barely touched him.
“I do.”
Then his warm, wet tongue was flicking all around Vlad, and he dropped onto his forearms.

“Never. Knew.”

“No one does until they experience it.”
Joey went back to torturing Vlad, who could only try to keep still and did his best not to make too

many embarrassing noises.

“That’s it, babe. Open for me.”
He continued for several more minutes, until Vlad feared he’d come again just from Joey’s

tongue in his ass. “Do it. Can’t take more.”

Joey reached over and grabbed something out of the drawer of his nightstand. “This is gonna be

cold, but it’ll warm up fast.”

Lube trickled down Vlad’s crack, and then a well-oiled finger began to push inside.
“Tell me if anything hurts.”
“Doesn’t.”
“Good,” Joey answered, chuckling. “Adding another.”
His two thick fingers together made Vlad’s passage burn, and he squirmed.
“Okay?”
Joey’s tone was rough, and Vlad understood. When he’d been about to fuck Joey, he’d thought he

was going to lose his mind.

“Yeah. Just…”
How do I describe this?
“Full? Kinda achy-sore?”
“Uh, yeah.”
“Need me to slow down?”
Joey had been gently pushing in and out of Vlad as he’d spoken, and the burning had transformed

into a strange combination of pain and pleasure.

“No. Want this.”
Leaning down, Joey whispered in Vlad’s ear. “Want you.”
Vlad turned his head to look at Joey. “Fuck me. I want to feel your cock inside me.” Joey dropped

his forehead onto Vlad’s back, two fingers still buried inside him.

“Shit.”
He was starting to pant, and Vlad took a perverse thrill in knowing he was the one making this

rough, tough guy lose control.

“Trying to go slow here.”
“Do it. I am ready.” He heard Joey grumble something into his skin.
“Give me a minute.”
He slowly pulled out and sat up, wiped his hand on the towel still on the bed, and then grabbed a

condom. Joey made quick work of putting it on before slicking it with lube.

Taking a deep breath, Vlad let it out slowly. He wanted this. Truly, he did. But shit, the thought of

something as big and wide as Joey’s dick in a place not designed for it definitely gave him pause.

A hand moved slowly up his back, and Vlad arched into the contact. Joey leaned over him.
“If anything hurts, tell me. Seriously. It might burn some, but it shouldn’t be really painful. If it

is, we’ll slow down or stop.”

Vlad could only nod. He wanted to say something, to reassure Joey he was okay, but the words

stuck in his throat, constricting his chest.

Breathe.
He took another long, slow breath and let it out. Joey tucked his cock into Vlad’s crease, and Vlad

gulped in another lungful of air just as Joey began to push inside. Vlad knew the head was the hardest

part to get in, so he rode the pain out, and after Joey popped through the initial resistance, both of
them let out a sigh.

“I am okay.”
“That’s my baby,” Joey crooned, and Vlad chuckled, the sound dying quickly when Joey sank

farther inside. “Still with me?”

“Fuck, yes.” The tissues and nerve endings in Vlad’s ass were hyperaware, and he swore he could

feel every ridge and vein up and down Joey’s dick. He moaned, unable to process the sensations into
words.

Joey groaned. “Need to move. Need to feel you.” Vlad arched his back, and Joey’s dick bottomed

out, his balls slapping against the sensitive skin of Vlad’s ass. “Shit.” He was out of breath, holding on
to Vlad’s hips as if one or both of them might go flying off into space. “So fucking tight. I’m dying.”

“Move.” Vlad couldn’t explain why, but if Joey didn’t start thrusting soon, Vlad feared he’d

crawl out of his own skin. For a moment, he worried he wouldn’t be able to beat back the fear, but that
wasn’t it. When Joey pulled out and then pushed back in, Vlad realized what the feeling was—pure
bliss. This was what Vlad was meant to do, what he was meant to be. The realization set him free. It
also scared the shit out of him.

It wasn’t like he was going to start leading the Gay Pride Parade in Pittsburgh, and he and Joey

had been messing around for a while now, but with Joey’s dick inside him, fucking him, everything
was different. His world had shifted on its axis.

“Hey. You got all stiff. Am I hurting you?” Joey was still buried deep inside, but one hand

kneaded the tense muscles of Vlad’s shoulders and neck. “What’s going on?”

“You’re perfect.”
“Then what’s the matter?”
“Nothing. I just—” Could he say this? Would Joey think it was only because they were having

sex?

“Babe? You can tell me anything. Don’t be scared.”
Vlad snorted. Scared? Try fucking terrified.
Joey started to pull out. Vlad’s hand shot out to grip the back of the other man’s thigh. “No. No.”
“No, what? Hon, you’re starting to freak me out. Talk to me. Where is this coming from?”
He started to withdraw again, but Vlad held tight.
“Ow. You can let go. I’m not going anywhere if you don’t want me to. But I do need you to let

me in on your thought process. I get the feeling this isn’t something you should keep inside.”

He was completely ruining his first time. I’m such an idiot. Trying desperately to salvage what

they’d had, Vlad said, “Fine. I will talk.” Joey slowly pulled out and pushed back in, and Vlad
moaned. “I’m not sure I can say this right in English.”

“Try.”
“I feel like I am finally who I am supposed to be. It feels right but wrong at the same time.” The

words came out in a rush, and Vlad let out a whoosh of breath. “I thought…maybe I would feel
disgusted or like less of a man if I ever let another guy fuck me.”

“Why would you—”
“Please let me finish.”
“Sorry.”
“You know how things are in Russia. Even though I have been here for ten years, I still heard a

lot of homophobic talk in the locker rooms going all the way up to the NHL. Hell, up until a few
months ago, sometimes a guy would call another guy gay or a fag, but they were mostly kidding. I like
most of the players in the NHL. They are good men.” He paused, collecting his thoughts. “I know I did
not seem to have any trouble blowing you. I was so horny I would have done just about anything you
wanted.”

“Good to know. Can make Vlad wash my truck and cook me dinner if I give him a handjob first.”
“Fuck you. I’m trying to be serious, to answer the question you asked.” Joey was still moving

inside him, and Vlad seriously considered telling the man they could talk about this later, after both of
them had come, but he feared he would lose his nerve.

“Go on, baby. I’m sorry.”
Vlad shook his head. “I don’t know if I can do this.”
“Do what?”
The soothing rubbing returned, and Vlad’s heart stopped feeling like it was going to leap out of

his chest. “I want you so much. I like you so much.”

“Well, that’s good. We agree.”
“Yeah, definitely. I like you more than I should.”
Why did I just admit such a thing?
“Not for me to say.”
Joey’s tone was careful and level, and Vlad finally turned to look at him. His face flamed as Joey

stared back at him, his expression serious. “You have some part in this.”

“A big part. But you still haven’t explained what’s going on in that hot head of yours, and I’m not

talking about the one at the end of your dick.”

“When I said I was nervous about me being on the bottom because I had never done it, I was not

being fully truthful.”

“Oh?”
Joey sat back on his heels after pulling out completely, and Vlad rolled onto his back, watching

as a thin bead of sweat worked its way down Joey’s chest. When he raised his gaze, Joey was
smirking.

“You were saying?”
“I really was scared, because I’d never been on the bottom before. Hell, I’ve hardly ever done

anything. But also it was like the…what do you Americans say…” Vlad shook his head, frustrated in
his inability to get his point across. “The final nail in the coffin.”

“You’re comparing being gay to being buried in a coffin?”
“No. Shit. I can’t say this right.” Vlad scrubbed a hand through his hair and sat up. He felt weird

lying down while Joey was seated; like he was at some kind of disadvantage. “I guess it meant I was
gay.”

“I went through a lot, figuring out I was gay, baby, but I don’t understand what you’re trying to

say. I’m sorry.”

“I could say if I let a guy suck me off I was not really gay, because like I said before, having your

dick sucked feels good no matter who is doing it.” Vlad shrugged. “And even fucking a man. You can
fuck a woman in the ass too, so it’s not bad. I could even say I wasn’t gay if I gave another guy head.”

Joey bridged his nose between his thumb and forefinger. “How do you figure?”
“I was just seeing what it was like. I was curious.”

“But if you let me put my dick up your ass, you’re suddenly gay?”
“It’s different than anything else we could do.”
“Because?”
The poor guy’s erection had completely flagged, and Vlad felt like a jerk.
He squirmed and then felt ridiculous. Vlad hadn’t squirmed since he was about seven years old.

“Because if I take you inside my body, I am letting you fuck me. I am offering my ass to be fucked.”
Slapping the bed, he said, “What I am is an idiot. I’m sorry.”

“No, this is important.”
Joey rose and headed toward the bathroom. When he neared the open door, he turned around and

speared Vlad with a look that could’ve made a president give up his nuclear codes.

“Do. Not. Move.”
Vlad nodded. When Joey closed the door to the bathroom, Vlad fell back against the pillows.

Everything had been fine. He’d felt good. Why was he still letting opinions he shouldn’t care about
influence him? He’d wanted his first time to be perfect, but instead it was a disaster.

A tear escaped, and Vlad hastily wiped at it. But another followed, and despite his best efforts,

Joey seemed to zero right in on them when he reentered the room.

“What the fuck? You need to let it out, whatever it is.” Lying down, he gathered Vlad in his arms.

“You’re safe here. Just let it out. Cry if you need to. It might help.”

“I bet you never dealt with this in the military.”
Joey scoffed. “I did. Plenty of times. And if you think big, bad special ops guys don’t cry, you’re

dead wrong. You wouldn’t believe the shit I’ve seen. Sometimes it just overwhelms you.”

“I’m sorry. I cannot even imagine the things you have had to do. I did not mean to offend you.”

Could this day get any worse? Another tear tracked down his face. Yes. Yes, it could.

“You didn’t, baby. I was making a point.” He gathered Vlad tighter. “Come on. You’ll feel

better.”

Vlad sniffled. “I can’t believe I am crying when we could be having sex. I am so stupid.”
“No, you’re not,” Joey gave him a little shake. “You’ve been under an incredible amount of stress

for a long, long time. Of course you were bound to snap. Having sex for the first time would certainly
be a good reason to freak out.”

“I’m sorry.”
“None of that either. We have plenty of time.”
Vlad tried to turn away and hide his face, but Joey refused to let him. There weren’t many guys

who were an equal to him in strength. It turned him on that he couldn’t manhandle Joey.

“No. Stay with me.”
Vlad pushed out of Joey’s arms and flipped over on the bed but yowled when Joey’s hand came

down hard on his ass.

“What did I tell you?”
Why the fuck is that growl so sexy?
Joey spanked him again. “What did I tell you?” Another hard slap. “I’m here for you, and I don’t

want you to hide from me.”

“I’m acting like a baby.” Several more hard slaps fell. “I never knew you were into this kind of

thing,” he finished with a grumble.

“I am when my boyfriend is being an ass. Seems like the most appropriate thing to do is redden

his ass for him.”

“Fine.” Vlad turned onto his back again, wincing a little when his sore ass came into contact with

the sheets. Joey shifted, taking Vlad’s dick in his mouth, and with a muffled curse, Vlad grabbed
Joey’s head. “Fuck. What are you doing?”

“If you don’t know—”
Vlad rolled his eyes. “Of course I know what you’re doing. I just do not know why.”
“Because I figured I’d have your full attention. Do I?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Now stop with all this crap. You’re not weak, you’re not a baby. And you aren’t less of a

man because you let me inside you. Am I less of a man if I let you fuck me?”

Vlad didn’t answer, and Joey was on top of him before he could even draw breath, holding him

down.

“Am I?”
His eyes flashed with something, and Vlad could see how Joey must’ve been a frightening guy to

deal with in his time. Though he knew Joey would never hurt him, in the moment, he was a little
afraid of the man. They were both still naked, and Joey, perhaps sensing Vlad’s unease, rubbed their
cocks together before grabbing and roughly jerking them both in his calloused hands.

“No. God, no, you’re not,” Vlad gasped out.
“Then why would you be?”
“I…I don’t know.”
“There is nothing wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be with men.”
Vlad looked away.
“Look at me,” Joey barked.
He did. The guy would have made an excellent instructor for those young kids coming into the

army. Vlad’s brain was far too scrambled to come up with the right word.

“Believe me,” Joey continued, “it took a long time before I believed I wasn’t some sick-in-the-

head pervert. I just don’t want to see you torturing yourself.”

“I love what we do. I love being with you.” I love you. “But sometimes, all that stuff drilled into

me takes over. And the fucking guilt about the Olympics thing. It is killing me. I wish I could tell
everyone. I can’t, though. I am not close to my family, but I cannot risk putting them in danger just so
I feel better about what I did.”

“Oh baby.”
Joey caressed the side of his face, and another tear leaked out. He caught it and then leaned down

to lick the side of Vlad’s face.

“I wish you didn’t have to go through all this. I’m rushing you. I knew it, and I still did it.” He sat

up and scrubbed his hands over his face. “I pushed you.”

“No,” Vlad told him. “You are one of the only good things in my life right now. Please. I need

you.”

Joey’s eyebrows drew down. “I’m not going anywhere.”
The sides of Vlad’s mouth crept up as relief swept through him. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”

“With the…other guy thing. Why did you call me your boyfriend just now?”
“Ah, you mean when I was spanking your disobedient ass?” Joey smirked and then reached

underneath Vlad to pinch the sensitive skin.

“Ow! Yes.”
“Because that’s what you are. We’ve been seeing each other exclusively for a little while now.

We’re more than fuck buddies. What would you call yourself?”

Vlad frowned. Were people supposed to fall in love this fast? He thought he loved Joey, or was it

just infatuation? Was Joey in love with him? Did he want Vlad for more than just sex? Would Joey
want him to come out?

Of course he would. He already said he didn’t want to live in the closet. Can I come out? Do I

dare?

Joey tilted his head. “Hon, your mouth is opening and closing like a fish.”
“Like a what?”
“Never mind. What’s going on inside your gorgeous head?”
“Nothing. Just trying to think about everything.”
“Well, how about you don’t think for a minute?”
Joey took both their half-hard dicks in his large hand and began to stroke. Vlad groaned. How

could such a simple thing feel so good? With his other hand, Joey grabbed the lube, popped the cap,
and poured some over the flushed heads of their cocks, working it down onto the shafts.

“I want you to come for me.”
“Yes.”
The man didn’t go easy on him, increasing the tempo until Vlad thought he’d lose his mind if he

didn’t  come.  With  a  shout,  he  spilled  his  release  onto  Joey’s  hand,  and  it  wasn’t  long  before  Joey
swore  and  more  warm,  milky  fluid  coated  them.  Joey  rose  and  came  back  with  a  washcloth  and  a
towel  before  returning  them  to  the  bathroom.  Joey  reentered  the  room,  and  Vlad  smiled. He’s  so
gorgeous.

“Are you hungry?”
Vlad blinked at the non sequitur, but his stomach growled. Joey laughed.
“I see you are. Come on, let’s get some food in you. Can’t have you wasting away while you’re

not playing. Get up and put on some pants. We don’t want to scare anybody.” He looked Vlad up and
down. “Or turn them on. I’d hate to have to kick some poor schmuck’s ass just because he has good
taste.”

Vlad rose and looked around for his underwear and jeans. Locating them, he stepped into them.

“Why is it so sexy you know all those things?”

“Like how to kill people?”
“Yeah. It seems like I should not think that’s hot.”
“A lot of people do,” Joey said with a smile. “Men and women alike are attracted to military

types. We make them feel safe or something.”

He winked, and Vlad seriously considered trying to revive the mood, but his stomach protested

the idea.

“Come on, babe. Let’s get you fed.”

Chapter Eight

Joe observed Vlad carefully as they ate their subs. They’d stopped into one of those fast-food

places, and Joe watched with a mixture of amusement and fascination as Vlad took several minutes to
make a decision about what type of sub he wanted, loading it up with everything conceivable, which,
to Joe’s mind, negated the time he’d spent debating the flavor of the sub. Joe just got a drink—he was
still full from breakfast earlier—but Vlad hadn’t eaten, and Joe was sure the other man had to be
famished.

It was practically obscene, watching Vlad eat his lunch. But that wasn’t the only thing Joe was

looking for. He couldn’t shake the notion that he still hadn’t gotten the full story about what had
freaked Vlad out. And even though it was killing him not to know, he’d made a vow to himself he
wouldn’t push. Already he felt like a lecherous asshole for thinking Vlad was ready to bottom.

They finished eating and went back to Vlad’s place. The plan was to watch some movies and take

it easy. Joe was fully on board. Though the hangover had definitely improved, he still had a headache,
and sitting on the couch wrapped in his man’s arms sounded pretty damn good.

Vlad let him into the apartment and went back outside to check on his mail. When he got back,

Vlad waved an envelope in the air. “It is from the US government.” He stared at it.

Joe tried to stay quiet, but finally said, “Well, open it.”
“What if they said no?”
“There might not be much you can do. But trying to mind meld with it isn’t going to change the

words on the page.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Just open it.”
Vlad thrust the envelope at him. “You do it.”
Chuckling, Joe accepted the offering and ripped it open before Vlad could get even more nervous.

Scanning the letter, he nodded and looked up at Vlad. “Your test is in three weeks. They fast-tracked
you.”

The color drained from Vlad’s face. “Three weeks?”
“That’s what it says.”
“Not much time to study, especially when I start playing again.”
Joe laughed. “For one thing, I think they teach you more about American history in Russia than

we do in this country. Plus, you obviously went to school here in the US once you came over. Are you
really going to complain about how much time they’re giving you? You asked to be rushed if
possible.”

“I know. I am just panicking.”
He turned what Joe figured Vlad thought were convincing doe eyes on him. Not likely, when

those eyes are ice blue.

“Will you help me study?”
Joe responded with a straight face. “Will you blow me while I go over stuff?”
Vlad’s eyes widened. “You really want me to? How would I listen to what you are saying?”
“Do you listen with your mouth?” Fucking with Vlad was kinda fun.
“Well, no, but—”
“What’s the problem?”

“I…” Vlad ran a hand through his hair. “Nothing. If you want it, then okay.” He looked down and

smiled a little. “I like sucking your cock. It’s not exactly a secret.”

Joe approached him, and Vlad looked up. “Oh babe, I’m not gonna sit there reading while you

suck me off. Your mouth needs to be available for answering questions. Now, afterward is a different
story.” He raised an eyebrow, and Vlad’s grin widened.

“I promise.”
“Where are you getting these things you have to study anyway? Should we go to a bookstore?”
“I have everything here. I, um, already bought them. There was a list of things online.”
“Aren’t you the Boy Scout?”
Vlad’s eyebrows drew down. “The what?”
“Never mind.” He’s gonna kill me with this confused stuff . Joey had never thought he’d consider

another man, especially not one built like Vlad, to be so endearing, but he did.

After throwing Joe another perplexed look, Vlad left the room, returning shortly with several

books and workbooks, dumping them on the coffee table. “This is all I have.”

“All?” Joe surveyed the pile in front of him. “I didn’t know we even had this much history. You

know the US has only been around for a couple hundred years, right?”

“I wanted to be prepared.” Vlad dropped onto the couch next to him. “Now are we going to study,

so you can get your reward, or are you going to make fun of me some more? I know that’s what you
are doing.”

Joe saw his quiet afternoon vanish, but the open, happy expression on Vlad’s face made it

impossible to say no. “Did they mention which one you should start with?”

Vlad reached forward and plucked a workbook off the table. “This has old tests in it.”
“Perfect.”
For the next few hours, Joe quizzed Vlad, who did remarkably well. It was clear he’d paid

attention in whatever schools he’d been in.

* * * *

A few days later, Vlad was cleared to practice and ended up playing the next night when another

player was injured. He wasn’t 100 percent, but Joe imagined he felt a hell of a lot better than the guy
who’d ripped his groin trying to stay onside while the young hotshot on his line dipsy-doodled down
the ice. The team left on a four-game road trip within hours of Vlad finding out he was playing, so Joe
didn’t see him before he got on the plane. The damn plane was still in the air, and already he was
missing the guy like crazy.

He’d worked an earlier shift, and now he sat home, alone. Joe considered going to Reggie’s, but

the Phantoms weren’t playing until tomorrow night, and there were no other good sports on at this
time of year. He most definitely was not a fan of basketball. Baseball would be starting soon. He could
handle watching, but given the choice, he’d take hockey any day. His tab had been settled long ago
when Joe had dropped by to take care of it, and he could tell Sal had wanted to ask him about Vlad, but
the man kept his mouth shut. Thank goodness, because Joe hadn’t been forced to lie.

So instead of going to Reggie’s or even The Strike Zone, Joey stretched out on the couch at home

with one of those meals you could purchase already made in the carryout area of the grocery store. He
considered he really should cook more often, but what was the point if he was alone? Having Vlad
there would make the effort worthwhile, but his boyfriend would not return for nearly nine days, so in
the meantime, Joey figured he’d subsist on simple stuff—cereal, eggs, and takeout.

Finding a movie he hadn’t seen before, Joey ate his meal and silently made fun of a ridiculous

plot about a bunch of aliens who looked like they couldn’t hold their own in a fight with a Chihuahua
take over Earth in the first twenty minutes of the movie. Of course, in keeping with the spirit of such a
movie, a ragtag team of men and women were assembled from around the world to fight back. Even to
himself, Joey couldn’t hold in an eye roll.

He fell asleep on the couch, waking in the middle of the night with one arm asleep and the rest of

him  hanging  halfway  to  the  floor.  Joe  stumbled  to  the  bathroom,  took  care  of  business,  peeled  his
clothes  off,  and  crawled  into  bed.  The  days  continued  much  the  same,  the  only  real  high  points  the
unintentionally  hilarious  texts  Vlad  was  sending  him.  Joe  felt  bad  for  the  guy,  but  hearing  him
complain  a  couple  of  days  before  the  team  was  set  to  return  home  about  his  roommate’s  sudden
penchant  for  gang-bang  porn—heterosexual  gang-bang  porn,  no  less—made  him  laugh  all  night.  He
could clearly picture the shudder that had surely gone through Vlad as he’d typed out those particular
texts.

Joe had a late shift the night Vlad was returning home, and when Vlad texted he was getting on

the plane, Joe told him to come over later if he had the energy. He’d only been home about forty-five
minutes when a knock sounded at the door. Grinning, he went to open it. There, on his doorstep, was
the man he loved. Yeah, he could admit it.

Joey, old boy, you are done like dinner . He chuckled when he realized he was starting to call

himself Joey.

“Get in here.”
Vlad stepped inside, and Joey kissed him, pushing Vlad’s jacket off his broad shoulders, his suit

jacket quickly following. Moaning into his mouth, Vlad kissed him back but then stepped away.

“I missed you.”
“I missed you too.”
He’d had no idea he would be so crazy for Vlad, but as the man stood in front of him, his massive

chest heaving from Joey’s kisses, he was about the sexiest thing Joey had ever seen. Obviously the
other man wasn’t on board with a sprint to the bedroom, though, so Joey bent to pick up his overcoat
and suit jacket.

“You do not have to.”
“Can’t have this custom”—Joey checked the tag—“Hugo Boss suit getting dusty on my floor.”

He turned to hang them both on the coatrack. “Are you hungry? Thirsty?”

“No, I’m fine. We ate dinner on the plane.”
Joey spun. “Really? Just how fancy are these planes you guys travel on?”
Vlad colored, and a hint of a smile appeared. “We have flight attendants who serve meals. Since

it’s a private plane, the food is actually very good.”

“A long way from a C-130.”
“What is a C-130?”
Laughing, Joey said, “It’s a large transport plane. It can carry tanks. Or people. Or both. Or tons

of other stuff, really. I’ll show you a picture if you want.”

“I just want to cuddle. I need to feel you.” He bit his lip. “I want to have sex, but I am really

tired.”

“It’s fine. We don’t have to get naked every time we see each other.” His dick didn’t agree, but

he ignored it.

“I would like to be naked. Maybe we could go to bed and just hold each other, maybe talk a little?

I know you probably didn’t have that in mind when you invited me over. I’m sorry.”

“Baby, there’s nothing to be sorry for.” Joey couldn’t resist running his fingertips down the side

of Vlad’s face. “Let’s get you lying down. You look completely beat.”

“You are not supposed to say such things out loud. It makes me feel like you think I look

horrible.” Vlad’s eyes crinkled at the corners, and Joey rolled his eyes.

“Yes, you look so horrible the thought of getting on my knees and sucking the remaining energy

out of your cock hasn’t even occurred to me.” Vlad’s breath caught, and Joey smirked. “I thought you
wanted to cuddle.”

“Why can’t we do both?”
“You’re a brat.” Grabbing Vlad’s hand, Joey pulled him all the way into his bedroom and began

to strip him.

“I could get used to this. Hey, did you eat?”
“When I got home.” Joey pointed to the bed. “Get in.”
“You’re like my coach,” Vlad grumbled. “Do this, do that. Don’t pass down the middle…”
Snorting, Joey stripped off his own clothes and climbed in after Vlad. “Aw, I bet you like being

told what to do.”

Vlad rolled over to face him, his eyebrows drawn down. “Why do you think so?”
“I was teasing you.”
“You might be the only person who I’d never argue with if you told me to do something. I even

argue with my coaches sometimes.”

“Reallyyyy…” Joey gave Vlad a smile with teeth. “Suck my cock.”
A laugh burst from Vlad. “Do you really want me to?”
“Just for future reference, the answer will always be yes. Always. What sane man doesn’t want a

blowjob? Besides, if you haven’t figured out yet I have an oral fixation, let me clue you in. I do.
Giving and receiving.”

“What’s an oral fixation?”
“I like things having to do with the mouth. Kissing, sucking cock, having my cock sucked. Some

of my very favorite activities. Pretty sure you have an oral fixation too. You can’t get enough of my
dick.”

Vlad stuck his tongue out, and Joey attacked. If the man was going to tempt him, he should

expect to have to follow through. Rolling on top, Joey held Vlad’s head in both hands and plundered
his mouth, his tongue thrusting in and out like he’d prefer to be doing in Vlad’s ass. With a moan,
Vlad flipped them over. In the next moment, Joey’s hard and leaking cock was in Vlad’s mouth.

“Mmm…” He pulled off and looked up. “You might be right.” He continued his assault on Joey’s

senses.

“Fuck!” Joey was about to come embarrassingly quickly, and he didn’t want this moment to end.

At the same time, he felt like a selfish prick, since he knew Vlad was tired. “Bring your dick up here,
big guy. I want to give you a proper welcome home. This is hardly fair.”

Without his mouth ever leaving Joey’s cock, Vlad twisted around, and Joey grabbed his erection,

using one hand to guide it into his mouth while the other landed on Vlad’s hip to move him into
position. Soon both were working each other feverishly, and the only sounds heard were moans,
groans, and grunts one forced from the other.

Stiffening beneath Vlad, Joey came, barely managing to keep Vlad’s pulsing dick inside his

mouth. He’d gone slack on it, but a man could only do so many things at once while his brain was
being assaulted with pleasure.

Joey’s body finally relaxed, and Vlad took the opportunity to push farther inside. The only thing

allowing Joey to breathe were his hands on Vlad’s thighs, holding the man off enough not to cut off
his airway completely. Vlad gave a hoarse cry and came directly down Joey’s throat, and Joey
swallowed. With one last guttural moan, the last spurts left Vlad and he pulled out, rolling off and to
the side of Joey.

“Okay, I admit, that was better than just going to sleep,” Vlad said.
After reaching for a couple of tissues, Joey tossed one to Vlad. “Like I said, what sane man

wouldn’t want to have his dick sucked as often as possible? An oral fixation seems completely normal
to me.”

Vlad turned and scooted back up to the head of the bed, his expression turning serious. “Thank

you for being here for me. I feel much less alone. I didn’t like coming home to an empty place at the
end of every road trip. Now I have something to look forward to.”

Joey was surprised and touched by Vlad’s sudden sentimental outburst. “It’s my pleasure. I like

being here for you.” Taking a deep breath, he said what he’d been chewing over almost constantly in
the time Vlad had been gone. “Probably because I’m falling in love with you.” He was rewarded with
a brilliant smile, and Joey let out a loud breath.

“I am the same. I was afraid to say anything. I thought I was just feeling like this, since you’re

the only man I’ve ever had sex with.”

“Do you think that’s why?” Please don’t let it be why.
“No.” Vlad palmed the back of Joey’s head and stared into his eyes. “I am falling in love with

you because you’re the best thing in my life. Including hockey.”

Joey swallowed around a lump in his throat. “Goes both ways.” He cleared his throat. “Why don’t

we settle down and get some sleep? I’ve got some time tomorrow before I have to be at work. I could
help you study.”

“We are off tomorrow.”
“Good. Come ’ere.” Joey pulled Vlad into the circle of his arms, laying the man’s head on his

biceps. “Sleep, baby.”

Within moments, they both were asleep, Joey dreaming of more nights like this with Vlad.

* * * *

Vlad awoke, not sure where he was. The feeling wasn’t entirely new, since the team was

constantly in different hotels, but this was different. For one thing, there was something pressing hard
and unrelenting against his ass. Joey. He smiled. Ever since Joey had fucked him for the first time
before his road trip, he’d been thinking about it happening again, especially since he’d messed the
whole thing up with his freak-out. Yes, he’d been sore for a day or two, but it was a weird kind of sore.
Not even bad. More like he could still feel Joey throbbing inside him.

His morning erection twitched, and Vlad chuckled to himself. Stretching his arms over his head,

he pushed his ass back, pressing on Joey’s dick.

“If you don’t stop, I’m gonna fuck you,” came a sleepy voice.
“Maybe I want you to.”
Joey groaned. “You really are going to kill me someday.”
“You are not even thirty,” he answered with a snort. “I think you’ve got a few good years left in

you.”

“I’m not as young as you are. And since I left the military, my conditioning isn’t what it used to

be.”

Vlad turned and leered. “You look fine to me.”
Joey climbed out of bed, shivering. “Whose idea was it to sleep naked?”
“Yours.”
On his way to the bathroom, Joey flipped him off. While his lover took care of his morning

duties, Vlad lay in bed, loving the chance to really relax. He couldn’t believe Joey had said he was
falling in love too. It was an unbelievable feeling.

They ate a quick breakfast, and in between bouts of making out on the couch, some studying did

happen. The test was quickly approaching, and Vlad didn’t know what he’d do if he failed it. Yes,
Russia was where he’d been born, where his family was, but it wasn’t home and never would be again.
Truthfully, he was content never setting foot in Russia for the rest of his life. The United States had
given him a chance. Maybe if he stayed, he could even come out. He didn’t want to live this secret life
forever, and he knew Joey wasn’t excited about the idea.

The rhythm of practices, games, and the like continued over the next few weeks until the day of

Vlad’s test. He and Joey had gone through all the study materials countless times, and Vlad knew the
information inside and out. Didn’t stop the butterflies, though. On the morning of the test, even though
Joey tried to cajole him into eating, Vlad refused.

“After the test.”
“But baby, that’s going to be hours from now.”
“Are you sure you want to come with me? You will be bored.”
“Positive. Now stop asking.”
Joey whacked him on the ass, and Vlad let the heat spread through his groin. He was pleasantly

sore after Joey had pounded him into the mattress last night, and he’d discovered he really liked it
when Joey spanked him as he fucked him. And his Joey was no dummy—he took every opportunity in
and out of bed to slap Vlad’s ass. But he wasn’t complaining. Maybe someday he’d work up the nerve
to ask Joey to tie him up and give him a real spanking. He wasn’t sure he’d consider himself kinky,
but he’d seen a similar scene in one of those pornos, and the idea of being powerless with someone he
trusted was intriguing. His dick certainly liked the way his ass felt when Joey spanked him.

Joey drove them to the testing center. Before they got out of the Jeep, he leaned over and kissed

Vlad’s temple. “You’re going to do great. You’ve got this. And when you’re done, I’ll be right
outside.”

“I love you.” Shit, was that different than saying he was falling in love? Had he gone too far?
His fear must’ve shone in his eyes, because Joey grabbed the sides of his face. Vlad’s eyes drifted

closed as Joey kissed each eyelid with the gentlest of touches.

“I love you too. Now go show ’em what you’ve got.”
With a deep breath, Vlad grabbed the folder of documents he’d need for the test and interview.

Suddenly he was more worried about the interview than anything else. What if he said something
wrong?

Joey got out of the car too and reached underneath Vlad’s coat to smooth the lapels of his suit.

“Do you own any suits you don’t look ridiculously hot in?”

Vlad had to smile. “Not according to you, I guess, and you are the most important person to think

so.”

He wished he could hold Joey’s hand on the way into the building. Joey wouldn’t mind, but Vlad

wasn’t quite ready to declare his sexuality to the world, and he was a recognizable figure in
Pittsburgh. Maybe soon he would be. Vlad was tired of living a lie.

The interview and test were the most nerve-racking things Vlad had ever done, more than NHL

draft day and the brief Olympics he’d been a part of. His belly rolled, and he wondered if Joey had
been right about eating. Too late now.

Just like he and Joey had practiced, Vlad spoke slowly to make sure the interviewer could

understand his answers. He didn’t have a thick accent like other Russian-born players because he’d
been in the US for so long, but it didn’t hurt to show the interviewer how well-spoken he was. When
the whole thing was over, the interviewer stood, came around to the front of her desk, and held out her
hand.

“Congratulations, Mr. Gusev.”
“I-I passed?” The last word came out as little more than a squeak, and Vlad felt light-headed as

he stood too quickly. Reaching down, he grabbed the arm of the chair he’d been sitting on. Then he
remembered the woman was still waiting for him to shake her hand, so he straightened, wincing when
he realized how clammy his hands were.

She leaned against the desk behind her once they’d shaken. “Yes, you passed. You’ll be receiving

an invitation to the formal ceremony within a few weeks. In larger cities, it often takes longer, but
here in Pittsburgh, we swear in citizens around once a month.”

“Thank you.” Tears sprang to his eyes, and he hastily wiped them away with the back of his hand.
“You’re welcome. Thank you for your interest in citizenship. Like I said, be on the lookout for

the invitation.” She gave him a gentle smile. “It shouldn’t be long now.”

Vlad said good-bye and walked in a daze out of the office. Joey clambered up from the bench

he’d been waiting for Vlad on.

“How did it go?”
“I passed!” He wanted so badly to take Joey in his arms and kiss him until he could become part

of the other man, but he managed to restrain himself by the barest of margins.

Joey leaned over. “I’m so proud of you, baby. Let’s go home and celebrate. Maybe I’ll teach you

a new trick.”

Now that Vlad could finally let go of the anxiety building for weeks, he grinned. “You make me

sound like a puppy.”

“Sometimes you’re as eager as one.”
Vlad shook his head. “You are crazy.”
Joey took him back to his place, and after stripping Vlad naked, leaving little kisses everywhere

he bared, he laid Vlad back on the bed. Much as he’d love for Joey to suck and bite his way up and
down the expanse of his body, Vlad couldn’t take the chance of one of his teammates noticing any bite
or love marks. All he needed were the boys thinking he had some puck bunny on the side. He wasn’t
sure he could keep up such an illusion, even if it would solve a whole lot of problems for him if they
thought he was having sex with a woman. Vlad shuddered. There weren’t enough condoms in the
world to protect a person from many of those girls, even if he’d had a bit of interest in having sex with
women anyway.

Sitting back, Joey assessed Vlad, and it was tough to keep a straight face as the man seemed to be

putting a lot of thought into what he wanted to do. Vlad didn’t mind—Joey could call the shots and
have Vlad moaning and begging for release, and they both knew it—but it was still funny to see an

expression Vlad figured was akin to one Joey might have before a mission.

Joey snapped his fingers. He took care of his own clothes and said, “Close your eyes.” Vlad bit

his lip. “Trust me, baby, I would never hurt you.”

Vlad did as he bade and could hear all manner of items being shoved around what Vlad assumed

was the bottom drawer of Joey’s nightstand. It was much larger than the top one and contained a
whole bunch of things that both intrigued and frightened him. He swallowed, willing his heart rate to
slow and his breathing to even out, reminding himself Joey would never hurt him.

“Are you almost done?”
Joey laughed. “Impatient, are we?” He gave a little tweak to Vlad’s nipple, and Vlad arched.

“You like?”

“Yes. Everything feels so good.”
“Open your eyes. I want to make sure you’re on board with what I’m thinking.”
Vlad did so and saw several items laid out on the bed. He looked up at Joey for an explanation.

With a grin, Joey straddled him, settling himself over Vlad’s thighs. He held up the first item.

“Do you know what this is?”
“Um, no.” Vlad’s face heated. Though Joey didn’t seem to mind, Vlad felt like he knew nothing

when it came to gay sex. Even all the porn he’d watched had left so much out of his field of
knowledge.

“It’s a vibrating cock ring. I’d like to put it on you.”
“What does it do?”
“When it’s at the base of your shaft,” Joey ran his fingertips right up Vlad’s cock and chuckled

when Vlad moaned, “it restricts blood flow. Basically it helps keep you hard longer. And the
vibrations are just kind of an added bonus.”

“Okay.”
Picking up the next thing, Joey asked, “How about this?”
“A dildo.”
“Excellent.”
Joey smiled at Vlad like he was his star pupil.
“I want to put it inside you. It also vibrates, which can feel incredible against your prostate.” He

dropped the dildo back on the bed. “While both of those are driving you crazy, I thought we might try
this.”

It was a child’s paddleball game thing. “What would we do with that?”
“I took the ball off. Now it’s just a thin, lightweight paddle. You like it when I spank you with my

hand, and I thought you might like going a little further.” He shrugged as if embarrassed. “I, um,
picked up the paddle after you seemed to react favorably the first time I smacked your ass. The
thought of it turned me on, but I didn’t want to spend a lot of money until I was sure you were into it.
Anyway, they’re just ideas. We can do whatever you want.”

“I want this. Yes, exactly this.”
“Are you sure?”
“If I don’t like it, you will stop. I trust you.”
“Good. Let’s do this first.” He picked up the cock ring and lubed it and Vlad’s dick before slowly

sinking it to the base. “I won’t turn on the vibration just yet.”

Vlad could feel the blood in his cock making it even harder, since it had no outlet. “This feels

really good.”

“It’s only gonna get better.” Joey picked up the dildo and climbed off Vlad. “Hold your knees up

by your chest. Oh. Need to make sure we still have access to this.” He touched Vlad’s cock. “Keep
your legs spread for me.”

They’d used dildos a couple of times before, which wasn’t a big deal by now, but every time Joey

wanted him on his back like this, Vlad always felt so exposed. Here he was, legs in the air, offering his
ass to another man. At the same time, though, it was incredibly freeing. He didn’t have to worry about
doing anything right. Joey would take care of him.

“Good boy.” After lubing Vlad’s hole, Joey slowly slid the dildo inside, maintaining eye contact

with Vlad. “How do you feel?”

“Mmm…”
“That’s all I get? Mmm? Maybe I should take it out.”
He began to do so, and Vlad’s hand shot down to stop the movement. Vlad knew Joey was teasing

him and chewed the inside of his cheek to discourage himself from reacting to the man’s taunting any
more than he already had.

“Keep your legs up. I want good access to all this pale skin.”
Joey traced little patterns on the backs of Vlad’s thighs, and Vlad shuddered. “Um, one question.”
“Of course, babe. Ask anything.”
“Will I be, um, red or anything tomorrow? I have practice.”
Vlad widened his eyes at the face-splitting grin Joey gave him. “That’s the beauty of this one.

Packs a nice sting but leaves very little redness. I actually did research on the Internet to make sure.
Saw some pretty interesting stuff.”

“Oh. Yeah, I bet you did.” Vlad chuckled. “Well…okay. Yes. I want to do this. You seem to know

a lot about this stuff. Just a little Internet research?”

Joey shrugged. “I’ve watched my fair share of porn too. And one guy I was seeing for a few

weeks was totally kinky. He taught me how to spank.”

“You have to learn how?”
With a leer, Joey said, “If you want to do it right.”
Vlad wasn’t sure how you could do it wrong but kept his mouth shut. He nodded.
“I’m going to turn on the cock ring.” Joey narrowed his eyes at Vlad. “I want you to try not to

come. It would be a lot harder, so to speak”—he chuckled—“to orgasm with the cock ring, but
concentrate on keeping it at bay. It’ll be good for you. Doing stuff like this makes you last longer
during sex.”

“Do I come too soon?”
“No, you’re great. But you are young.”
Vlad sighed. “This again.”
Joey gave the engorged head of Vlad’s cock a little slap, and Vlad’s breath caught.
“Be good, or I’ll spank you.”
“I thought that was what you were going to do anyway?”
“Oh, I am, but I meant on here.” He batted Vlad’s dick with two fingers, and the thing waved

around like a buoy bobbing in a stormy sea. Vlad groaned. “Hmm. Look at you. What a naughty little
man you are.”

“Little?” Vlad looked down at his huge, throbbing erection. “Nothing small about me.”
“No, there’s not.”
Leaning down, Joey sucked the head into his mouth, and Vlad tried not to crawl out of his skin.
“Man, you are so much fun to play with.”
He turned the vibrator on the dildo to what Vlad assumed was low, also known as “slowly taunt

boyfriend mode,” and a very strange but really fucking good sensation surrounded his groin. Joey
turned it up a little more, a wicked grin playing over his face.

“Feels good,” Vlad managed to force out through a locked jaw.
“Excellent. Now close your eyes again. I don’t want you seeing where the next stroke of the

paddle is coming from. I’ll start slow and build.”

“Fuck, yes. Do it.”
“How needy.”
Joey hadn’t even finished talking when the air in the room changed, and the paddle fell on Vlad’s

skin for the first time. Vlad sucked in a breath, but before he could let it out again, another blow fell
on  the  opposite  cheek.  Joey  started  paddling  him  all  over  his  ass  and  thighs,  in  no  recognizable
pattern. Joey was right—the paddle stung a ton, even though Vlad knew Joey wasn’t wielding it with a
whole  lot  of  power.  His  whole  backside  quickly  morphed  into  a  constant  low  burn,  but  the  two
vibrating  sex  toys  were  slowly  making  him  insane.  The  head  of  his  cock  was  surrounded  by  wet
warmth, and Vlad bucked. With a chuckle, Joey put an arm over the backs of Vlad’s thighs and started
to lick both his dick and balls.

Vlad let out a strangled cry. “No fair.”
Joey pulled off. “Who said anything about fair?”
The paddling began again, harder now, and Vlad tried to squirm—no easy task with Joey’s arm

clamped around his thighs.

“Uh-uh. No trying to escape.” He paused. “You doing okay, though?”
“Losing. My. Mind.” Vlad’s teeth were clenched, and he idly wondered if he’d chip a tooth.

Wouldn’t be the first time, considering his profession.

“Good.”
Vlad clearly heard the note of amusement in Joey’s voice. He drew him right to the edge, slowly

but surely, over and over again. “Fuck me.”

“Not this time. This is about you.”
Vlad forced his eyes open. “I like it when you fuck me. I really do. It wouldn’t just be for you.”
“Excellent piece of information to file away, but no. Close your eyes, or I’ll blindfold you.”
With a grunt, Vlad shut his eyes again, resigning himself to having pieces of his brain leak out of

his dick one drop at a time—drops Joey eagerly licked up. The sting from the paddle was getting
pretty intense, and Vlad made an undignified whining sound in the back of his throat.

“Too much, baby?”
“A little. I need to skate tomorrow.”
“Okay.”
Before Joey had even finished talking, the vibration level on both toys kicked up a notch. Joey

left him there, hanging on the precipice of insanity, for what seemed like forever. Mercifully he
finally got around to stroking his cock and removing the ring. Vaguely Vlad was aware Joey had added
more lube as he jerked Vlad off, but the ring coming off still forced a strangled gasp from him.

Chapter Nine

“Are you kidding me?” Vlad slammed the Sunday paper down on the table. Joey whirled around

from his spot in front of the stove.

“What’s wrong, baby?”
Vlad stabbed his finger at the offending words in the paper. “Russia just passed some bullshit

antigay laws. I could actually get arrested for holding your hand in public.” He paused, cold fury
crashing through his veins. “You could too, even if you’re not a citizen.”

“Fucking ridiculous. But I can tell you one thing, hon. I know your family lives there and all, but

I have no particular desire to visit Russia.”

“I did not have plans to go back either, and this just made my decision for me.”
“What about your parents?”
Vlad sighed. “I’ve been over here a long time. They have never visited me, even when I was

calling home, crying because I missed them so much. Do you know what they said when I got kicked
off the Olympic team? I should be ashamed because I’d ruined my chances to play for Russia forever.
I did it for them—which I tried to say—but it did not matter. And you know what? I don’t want to play
for Russia.” He frowned, his brows knitting. After a pause, he continued. “Huh. With my American
citizenship, I am not sure I could play even if I wanted to, though. For the US or for Russia. I’d have
to look at the rules.” He stood. “I just can’t believe this. I never thought it would go this far, that
Russia hated gays this much.”

Joey plated the pancakes he’d been making and then put his arms around Vlad. Despite the

warmth of the day as spring progressed, Vlad soaked in the fuzzy feeling he always got when Joey
held him.

“I love you.”
Moving back a half step, Vlad palmed the back of Joey’s head. “I will never get tired of hearing

those words.”

“I hope not.”
Joey’s cell rang. He pulled it out and answered it. Several seconds passed when Joey said nothing.

Vlad watched in horror as suddenly Joey collapsed into a chair, barely avoiding landing on his ass on
the floor.

“No fucking way,” he said into the phone, his voice cracking on the last word. “No fucking way.

Oh, God, I can’t believe this.”

Vlad’s eyebrows drew down. Kneeling in front of Joey, Vlad rubbed Joey’s legs in the only show

of comfort he could think to give.

“When?” Joey made a disgusted noise. “Of course not.” He listened for a little while longer.

“Call me when you know more.” Joey dropped the phone on the table and put his head in his hands.

“What is it? What’s wrong?”
“Brendan. Dead.”
“What?”
“On his last fucking day, on the way out of that godforsaken hellhole, his transport was shot

down. When the medics got there, it was a ball of fire. No survivors. Brendan and six other guys, all
on their way home except for the pilot, were killed.” Joey grabbed his stomach. “Fuck, I’m gonna be
sick.”

He jumped up from the chair so fast it careened wildly before toppling over. Vlad ran after him

into the small bathroom in the hall. As Joey dry heaved, Vlad rubbed his back, whispering nonsense.
He supposed anything he said would be nonsense. Vlad hadn’t known the man and couldn’t offer
anything of substance but the lame comfort he was now giving.

After several moments, Joey crawled to the side of the room and leaned his head on the wall

behind him. His eyes were closed, but tears leaked from the corners. Vlad flushed the toilet and
grabbed a washcloth, soaking it in cold water before running it over Joey’s face. Yes, he and Joey had
only been together a couple of months now, but he’d never seen his man like this. He looked utterly
destroyed.

Vlad tried not to let Joey’s reaction get to him. Joey’s friend had been killed. This wasn’t about

Vlad. He pushed any questioning thoughts away.

“Do you need anything?”
Joey opened his eyes. “For the fucking war to end.”
“I know. It almost is.”
“I’m so fucking angry, I want to punch something. Not you,” he added when Vlad moved away

involuntarily. “I won’t. I just want to. Breaking my hand and putting a hole in my drywall won’t bring
him back. Those assholes. They have no respect for human life. He was coming home.”

His voice rose as he spoke, and Vlad couldn’t take not touching him. He just hoped Joey would

let him.

“Shh…” Scooting next to Joey in the small space, Vlad took Joey’s head and laid it on his

shoulder, slowly stroking his hair.

“Can I have some water? My mouth tastes gross.”
“Of course.” Vlad filled a glass sitting on the bathroom counter and brought it to Joey.
“Thanks.” After taking a few sips and spitting into the toilet, Joey set the glass down on the floor.

“Fuck.” Knocking the back of his head on the wall behind him, he repeated the litany once more.

“You’ll hurt yourself.” Vlad reached a hand down. “Come on. We can cuddle on the bed. Get up.”
Joey took his hand, and Vlad pulled Joey to his feet—no easy task, since he only outweighed Joey

by about fifteen pounds. Vlad led him away from the kitchen, their breakfast forgotten, and urged Joey
under the covers in the bedroom. They settled with Vlad on his side, drawing random patterns on
Joey’s chest, and Joey on his back, staring at the ceiling. After a few moments, Joey turned his head
and met Vlad’s gaze.

“Me being upset about Brendan doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”
“I know.”
“Do you?” Joey grabbed Vlad’s hand, kissing his palm. “I love you.”
Vlad nodded. “I believe you. I love you too.” He squeezed Joey’s hand. “You are allowed to be

sad. He was your friend.”

“Yeah.”
Joey’s gaze grew distant, and Vlad gathered Joey in his arms. He hated to see his lover like this.
“Yeah, he was.”

* * * *

Two days later, Vlad burst into Joey’s house. They’d taken to leaving the door unlocked if they

knew the other was coming over, but Joey jumped, and Vlad winced. He hadn’t meant to scare Joey,
but he was so angry, he couldn’t even see straight.

He tossed the letter to Joey. “You really will not believe this.”
Joey picked up the folded sheet of paper, crumpled from Vlad’s rough handling of it, and opened

the missive.

He looked up after reading it. “Is this a joke?”
“Russians do not joke.”
Joey raised an eyebrow. “You joke.”
Rolling his eyes, Vlad said, “I meant people like this don’t joke. Can you believe it? First they

made me use a horrible gay slur, which by itself almost killed me, and yet did not hesitate to dump me
off the team when I did what they wanted. They ruined my Olympic dream. Now they think I’m going
to run back to the Russian team and play in the World Championships?”

Vlad’s NHL team was on the verge of missing the playoffs for the first time in nearly twelve

years, despite Vlad’s forty-three goals and ninety-two points. Vlad had wondered at times why they’d
chosen to use him for their “get the Americans off their game” plan, since he’d been one of Russia’s
strongest players, but he kept his thoughts to himself. It was no use spending time and energy trying to
figure these people out. No matter what, though, there was no way in hell he was ever putting on a
jersey for a Russian team again.

“Apparently they didn’t get the notice about your new citizenship. Didn’t you send them an e-

mail or something?”

“I did. It seems they ignored it.” He plopped down on the couch next to Joey, rested his head on

the back cushion, and stared up at the ceiling, willing his blood pressure to fall before he gave himself
a heart attack at age twenty-four. “I’m so angry right now, and I have no idea what to do.”

“What do you want to do?”
Vlad sat up and looked at Joey. “Tell them to fuck themselves.”
“There’s your answer.”
“No, I want more. I want to get them back.” He was surprised at the sheer amount of venom in his

own voice.

“How do you intend to?”
“I have no idea.”
“Well, until then, why don’t you let me relax you?”
Joey leered, and Vlad chuckled. His boyfriend never failed to put a smile on his face.
Pivoting until he was lying on the couch with his legs over Joey’s, he said, “Do what you have to

do. My body is yours.”

“Hmm.” Joey licked his lips. “Where to start?” After a moment, he reached over, pulled up

Vlad’s T-shirt, and attached his mouth to a nipple.

“There is good.”
And just like that, Joey made him forget everything but the swirling morass of pleasure he was

sucked into every time Joey touched him.

But the pleasant feelings didn’t last long. A couple of days later, he was on the bike at the arena,

working some lactic acid out of his muscles after a game, when Pat hopped on the bike next to him.

“Dude, you’re taking this way too personally.”
“Huh?” Vlad turned to the man.
“You did all you could. The rest of us let you down.”
Vlad’s mind hadn’t been on the game his team had just lost. During the game, he’d forced

himself to concentrate. The fans paid a lot of money for tickets, and they deserved to see his best
work, whether the team was making it into the postseason or not. But now, afterward, his thoughts had
drifted back to the damn letter.

“You did not let me down. We win as a team, we lose as a team.”
“Spoken like a true cliché.”
He spared the man a small smile. “I learned everything I know about giving the right answers to

the media from you.”

Pat pointed to himself. “Me? Oh man, you’re in big trouble.” They pedaled silently for a few

moments, each seemingly caught up in their own thoughts. Pat cleared his throat. “Something else is
bothering you. Want to talk about it?”

Vlad’s head whipped around, and he gaped. “Why do you think something is wrong?”
Giving Vlad a grin, Pat said, “You aren’t nearly as mysterious as you think you are. A lot of the

time, your emotions are written all over your face.”

He frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I can read you. I know when you’re happy, or mad, or whatever. I pay attention. Not everyone

does, but when your entire job centers around annoying other players into taking stupid penalties, you
have to be a good judge of character.”

Vlad argued with himself. Could he give his secret away to Pat? The guy had been one of the first

to befriend him again after the Olympics debacle. “Could we…” He licked his lips and looked away
for a moment before returning his focus to the other man. “Could we get a drink or something? I don’t
want to talk about this here.”

“Sure, man. Of course. Meet at Kelsey’s in half an hour?”
“Sounds good.”
Hopping off the bike, Vlad made tracks for the shower. Along the way, he texted Joey to see if he

could meet them. Having Joey there would make everything so much easier. Plus, if Pat didn’t take
the news well, he’d have both Vlad and Joey to contend with. Maybe Vlad should casually mention
Joey’s ex-military status before getting into things.

Joey said he’d be there, and Vlad hurried to get ready and go. It would be ideal if he could talk to

Joey for a few minutes before Pat arrived, but he hadn’t seen Pat around the locker room and wasn’t
sure if the guy had already left. With a family of mice doing the waltz around his stomach, Vlad drove
to the popular late-night eatery. Players were generally left alone there, which made it a favorite haunt
for postgame meals. He hadn’t thought of that when Pat had suggested the place, but it was too late
now.

He got out of his car and practically sprinted for the entrance. Joey was standing in the lobby, and

Vlad wanted so badly to grab him and inhale his scent, since the touch and smell of his man was one
of the only things that calmed him, but he knew he couldn’t here.

“Okay, so I’m meeting Pat.” He bit his lip, glancing around him. “I’m, um, I am going to tell

him.”

Joey’s eyes widened. “Are you sure about this?”
“No. But I think I can trust him. If he goes nuts, though…”
“He won’t lay a finger on you as long as I’m here.”
The words came out as little more than a growl, and Vlad fell even more in love with the man, if

the notion was even possible.

Pat arrived, and though his brows knitted in confusion when Vlad introduced Joey, he shook

Joey’s hand. They were seated in a booth toward the back of the restaurant. After ordering beers and
waving away menus for the moment, they settled back. Vlad felt a flutter on his leg and realized Joey
was lightly stroking him. The action instantly soothed some of his nerves, and he looked up at Pat.

“I wanted to talk to you away from the other guys.”
“Okay.”
“I do not know how to say this.”
“Try,” Pat urged. “I’ll listen to whatever you have to say.”
“I’m gay.”
Now Pat’s eyebrows shot up. “Get the fuck out.”
He hadn’t reached over the table, which Vlad took for a good sign. “I am. This is my boyfriend.”
Pat’s gaze shot to Joey, who hadn’t said a word yet and was sitting with his arms folded over his

sizeable chest. “Good taste.”

“Excuse me?”
Laughing, Pat said, “It’s cool, man. I have to admit, you totally surprised me, and I want to hear

the story behind what the hell happened in Geneva and why you did what you did, but I’ve got your
back.” He shrugged. “It’s no one’s business who a man loves.” Holding his arms out in front of him,
he continued. “I mean, I’m not gay—I love women way too much—but I have no problem with
anybody who is.”

Vlad couldn’t decide if he wanted to puke, cry, or have a good laugh. “You’re the first person

I’ve told.”

“I assume Joey knows.”
“You never change. And please don’t. You make me laugh every day. I was talking about the first

hockey-related person.”

“I figured. So the whole being-gay thing is what’s got you so upset?”
“No.” Vlad proceeded to give him the real story of his disastrous time in the Olympics.
When he finished, Pat shook his head. “Damn, those Russians don’t mess around. I’ve heard of

the Russian mob, but I wasn’t sure if it was a real thing or not.”

“Oh, they’re real.”
“No shit.” He jerked his head toward Joey. “So how did you hook up with him?”
Joey, who had been mostly silent to this point, said, totally deadpan, “I chased him down the

street.”

Pat sputtered, droplets of beer landing all over his hand and the table. “You did what?”
“Long story, but yeah.” Now Joey smiled. “I wasn’t going to hurt him. I just wanted to talk.”
“So you run after the guy so you could ‘talk’ to him?” Pat sounded incredulous, and Joey

laughed.

“Like I said, long story. But we’ve been together for, what,” he glanced at Vlad, “four or so

months now?”

“I think so.” He turned his attention back to Pat. “There’s more.”
“I’m gonna need another beer.”
“Since you spilled yours all over your suit?” Vlad asked, smirking.
Pat flipped him off. He waved over the server after a moment and asked for another round. With

the task completed, he sat back.

“Okay, hit me with it.”
“Russia wants me to play in the World Championships.”
“After what they did to you? Assholes.”
“Exactly. I have no intention of playing for them. I’m actually an American citizen now, so I

don’t know if I’d even be allowed to play for Russia in an international tournament.” An idea formed,
and Vlad spoke. “I need to use whatever fame I have to do something about their attitude toward
gays.”

Both Joey and Pat gaped. “Exactly what are you saying?” Joey asked, recovering first.
“I want to do a press conference.”
“Are you out of your fucking mind?”
“I think he should,” Pat interjected.
Joey snorted. “Easy for you to say. You wouldn’t be the one with your career on the line.”
“I know.” Pat looked at Vlad, his expression dead serious. “I think if you tell some of the other

guys, they’ll back you up. Some might even come to the press conference and say they don’t care if
you’re gay.”

Vlad’s gaze darted around the room, but no one seemed to be paying them any attention. He

couldn’t believe he was actually considering this, but it felt right. Hell, he’d already fucked himself in
the eyes of tons of people when he’d caved to the Russian mob pressure and called Stephen a fag at the
Olympics last year. How much worse could this be? At least he would have the freedom to finally live
his life on his own terms. His family would probably disown him, and though he cared about them and
their well-being, he couldn’t let what his family would or would not do influence his decision.

“I want to do it.”
“I’ll help you however I can,” Pat said with a firm nod. After taking a sip of his beer, he said, “I

have an idea. We’re off tomorrow. I’ll call a bunch of the guys and invite them over to my place. You
can tell them with me right by your side. And Joey, of course.”

“What time?” Joey asked. “I have a shift at the airport until three in the afternoon.”
Pat shrugged. “Four?”
“Are you sure about this?” Vlad asked. His hand shook as he picked up his beer, and when he

looked down, he realized the bottle was empty. Joey slid his over without a word.

“Totally, man. I can’t even imagine what it must be like to be in your position.”
“It sucks.”
“I hear that’s a popular activity with your crowd, though,” Pat responded with a wicked grin.
Vlad rolled his eyes. “Whatever. I’m hungry.”

* * * *

Joey raced home to change before going to Pat’s house. Normally he would’ve gone in what he’d

worn to work, but an oil spill had leaked right through his coveralls, leaving him grimy. After the
quickest shower he could remember taking since leaving the military, he got dressed and headed over
to Pat’s place. Vlad was already there, pacing.

“Go ahead,” Pat told him. “Give him a hug and calm him down. He’s gonna ruin my floors.”
“Thanks. I will. Baby, stop.” Grabbing hold of Vlad’s upper arms, he physically stilled him.

“Look at me.” Vlad’s eyes finally focused on him. “Good. Now breathe.” With a stiff nod, Vlad did as

he bade. “Now kiss me.”

A startled laugh escaped Vlad. “Seriously?” He glanced over at Pat.
With exaggerated movements, Pat headed toward the kitchen. “I’ll just give you kids some alone

time. Don’t do anything that’ll stain. The guys will be here soon.”

Joey retained his grip on Vlad. “Everything is going to be fine. Do you know why?”
“Why?”
“Because I love you. And I’ll be right here. Oh, and maybe more importantly, I will kill a man

with my bare hands if they give you any trouble.”

“Why does hearing you say that make me so horny?”
“I dunno, but I’ll let you show me exactly how hot that makes you later.”
The doorbell rang, and Vlad groaned. “I guess it’s time. I love you.”
“Love you too.” Joey released him and stepped out of personal-space territory.
As the guys entered, several glanced at Joey, who had taken up residence leaning on the wall by

the archway into the kitchen, his arms folded over his chest and the same expression he’d used to
intimidate bad guys while in Delta Force. Everyone gave him a wide berth. That was fine. If they were
afraid of him, maybe they’d be less likely to give Vlad a hard time.

When everyone was there and seated, Vlad cleared his throat. “I…um…” His gaze sought Joey’s,

who gave a subtle nod. “I…wanted to talk to you guys.”

Pat came to stand next to Vlad. “Go ahead.”
Joey wanted to be the one lending support, but this was Vlad’s show and he didn’t want to

pressure him.

“So you guys know what happened at the Olympics. We never talked about it, but you know.

What you don’t know is why.” Vlad took a deep breath. “I was forced. See, the Russian mob is
involved in the hockey program. I assume you’ve all at least heard rumors about them, right?”

Seven stunned faces peered back at him, a few nodding. Wait’ll he tells them the rest.
“Well, a lot of those rumors are true, and I was too scared to say no.”
“Keep going,” Pat encouraged him.
Vlad nodded. “I am. There’s more to the story. When I got kicked off the team and came back

here, I was miserable.”

He looked at Joe once more. Smiling, Joey nodded again, hoping it would give him the push he

needed. “I was dying of guilt because I’d said such a horrible thing. Most of all, because I said it even
though I’m gay.”

Several guys gasped or muttered, but no one got up to charge Vlad or started screaming

homophobic slurs. A good sign. Vlad motioned toward him. “Meet my boyfriend. You should know
he’s ex-Delta Force.”

A couple of the guys laughed nervously, but one rose. “Nice to meet you. I never believed Vlad

was the kind of guy to think, much less say, something so idiotic. I’m happy he has some support.” He
held out his hand, and after a few beats, Joey took it.

“Good to meet you too, man.”
“How about some names?” the man suggested.
Joey laughed. “Oh, sorry. I’m Joe. Vlad over there calls me Joey, but everyone else calls me Joe.”
The man nodded. “Good to meet you, Joe. I’m Sampson.”

“Sampson?”
“Sorry, last name. It’s a habit. Tyler Sampson. The guys call me Sammie, so whatever you want

is fine. I promise not to call you Joey if you promise not to break me in two. I’m Vlad’s road
roommate.”

Tyler was one of the smaller players on the team. Joey nodded. “You got it, bud.”
Gradually the rest of the guys rose, making their way over to Vlad and Joe. Pat clamped a huge

arm around Vlad’s shoulders and squeezed. Joey winced just as his lover did. Yeah, that’s gonna
bruise. Oh well, they can add to the ones I’ll put on his hips when I fuck him into oblivion later.

“I told you it’d be fine,” Joey heard Pat say.
“This is great, but it’s only a third of the team.”
“The others will find out when you do the press conference.”
One of the guys spun. “Press conference?”
“Oh, yeah, I did not tell you. I got my US citizenship recently. You might not have known. I

didn’t talk about it a lot.”

Several guys murmured they hadn’t heard, and Vlad continued. Joey watched them closely to

gauge their reactions.

“Russia invited me to play in the World Championships. Obviously with the way they treat

people like me, plus what they did at the Olympics, there’s not a chance in hell I will ever play hockey
for them again.”

“Why do you need to call a press conference?”
“Because I want to say why I won’t. I will not talk about the pressure during the Games, because

it would make the Russian mob mad, and I don’t want to have a problem with them, but I’m coming
out. Living in secret is not fun, and I do not want to do it anymore. I want to walk down the street with
my hot boyfriend and put my arm around him.”

Joey barked out a laugh, and thankfully the other guys joined in.
Pat spoke up. “We were hoping some of you guys would agree to attend, to support Vlad.”
Vlad jumped back in. “No pressure, though. I wouldn’t ever want you to do something you were

uncomfortable with.”

Tyler, apparently the spokesperson for the group, looked around and said, “Tell us when and

where, and we’ll be there.” The other guys murmured their agreement.

Tears welled up in Vlad’s eyes, and Joey finally moved away from the wall to rub Vlad’s back.
“I’m sorry.”
“What are you sorry for?” Tyler asked.
“I feel so…”
“Relieved? Happy? You don’t look it. But I know it’s got to be a shit ton to deal with. Like I said,

we support you, on and off the ice.”

Pat piped up, a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. “If you can play, you can play,”

repeating the slogan of the You Can Play organization the NHL had recently begun supporting.

Everyone laughed, and Joey decided he really liked the guy, even if he was the size of a small

sequoia.

Wiping hastily as more tears gathered in the corners of his eyes, Vlad choked out, “Thanks,

guys.”

“Give the poor kid a hug, Joe,” Pat said with a not-very-subtle shove to Vlad’s shoulder.

Joey looked around.
“Go ahead,” Tyler said. “He needs you. The rest of us need beer. You’re a terrible host, dude.”
And just like that, the tension dissipated. Joey released his first deep breath of the day. He

couldn’t even imagine how Vlad was feeling.

* * * *

The next day, Joey slept in a little after Vlad left for practice. He was awoken by a thump and got

up to investigate. Outside his door was a package. His mouth opened in shock when he saw the return
address was Brendan’s parents.

Oh, fuck.
Handling the thing like it was a bomb, he brought it inside and set it on the kitchen table. Had

Brendan’s parents discovered his secret?

With shaking hands, he opened the box. Inside was a bunch of items, but he picked up the

handwritten letter on top first.

Joe,
Brendan sent a box back before he came home, so his load would be lighter. We thought you

would like these things. Your name and address were in the box. I know he was planning to come see
you, and I hope you’re doing well. He spoke highly of what a good friend you were to him. We think of
Brendan often.

Mrs. Booth
His gaze flew between the letter and the contents of the box. He started pulling things out—

mostly wrinkled pictures of the two of them together and other mementos. Joey chewed on the inside
of his cheek to quell the rising tears. There was no mention of his parents knowing Brendan was gay in
the admittedly short note, and Joey couldn’t help but hope they were ignorant of that information. He
had no clue how they would have reacted if Brendan had come out to them, but he wanted Brendan’s
parents to remember their son as the hero he was and nothing else.

Once he’d gathered everything together, he brought it into his bedroom and set the box on his

dresser. Later, when the season was over, he’d show everything to Vlad, but for now, there were other
things to contend with. He made a note to send a thank-you letter to Brendan’s parents.

If Vlad’s team lost tonight, they were officially eliminated from the play-offs. Vlad had decided

he’d call the press conference the next day if they lost. Just to be on the safe side, Joey had taken the
day off, but he still had a shift later, so he got ready for the day and headed to the gym to work off
some of the roiling nervousness he was feeling on Vlad’s behalf before work.

The team suffered a defeat at the hands of Buffalo, and when Vlad arrived at Joey’s house, he sat

down heavily on the couch and regarded Joey.

“This day sucks in so many ways.”
“Having second thoughts?” Joey asked as he handed over a bottle of water.
“No.”
“You sure? It’s not your job to be the spokesperson against Russia.”
Vlad shrugged. “Someone has to. Might as well be me. At least I’m over here, and they can’t

burst into the room and arrest me. I know I should be worried about my family, but I feel like they
abandoned me. Plus, when this gets out, they’ll disown me anyway.”

Despite his assertion, Joey knew Vlad couldn’t be feeling as calmly determined as he sounded.

“You know this is going to change everything.”

Vlad looked at him. “Everything has already changed. I’ve been living in hell since the Olympics,

and pretty much in hell even before, not understanding my own body and feelings. Now I can at least
move forward.”

Joey watched Vlad’s Adam’s apple bounce.
“With you.”
“Oh, no question.” Joey grinned. “You can’t get rid of me now.”
Vlad grabbed the sides of his face and brought their foreheads together. “I hope not. Hey, during

the press conference, can I say who you are? I want to be open if I’m going to do this, but I won’t do
anything to will make you uncomfortable.”

“I’m out, baby. It’s fine.”
“Like, your boss and stuff know?”
“Yes. I didn’t want to lie.”
Vlad nodded. “Okay. Thanks for being here and supporting me. It means everything.”
“It’s what I’m here for.”
They stayed there, gazing silently at each other, until Vlad’s phone buzzed. Joey raised an

eyebrow.

“It’s probably Jason. I got his number from Tyler and gave him a call. I thought he might be able

to help, or at least he’d have some notice before the press got to him to ask him if we’ve been fucking
each other.” With an eye roll he answered and after a brief conversation said, “I’ll put you on speaker
too.”

“Okay, you’re on speaker over here. Now both Patrick and I can hear and talk back.”
“And, um, I’ve got my boyfriend, Joey, here.”
“Hi, Joey,” came a chorus of voices, and Joey couldn’t help but smile.
“Hi, guys.”
“This is an incredibly brave thing you’re doing,” the one with the lower voice said. Joey assumed

it was Patrick, since it sounded different from the one he’d heard before.

Vlad blushed, and Joey chuckled. “He’s blushing.”
“I am not.” He whacked Joey in the arm. “Anyway, like I told you in the texts, the press

conference will hopefully be tomorrow. It’s locker clean-out day, so all the media guys will be there. I
guess calling it a press conference is sort of silly. It will be more like me saying, ‘Yeah, we weren’t
good enough, need to be better next year, and oh, by the way, I’m not playing in the World
Championships for Russia because I’m gay.’”

“Uh, yeah. That’ll do it,” Jason said.
“Will you be able to be with him, Joey? I believe Vlad said you don’t work for the team?” Patrick

chuckled. “How novel. A guy who works in hockey dating someone who isn’t a player or a coach.”
Joey heard a commotion. “Ouch! What was that for?”

“Behave.”
Vlad smiled. Maybe we aren’t the only kinky ones. The band around Joey’s chest loosened a little.

It was killing him, watching Vlad go through this and knowing there was little he could do to help.
He’d never had to actually out himself. When he’d come home from the Middle East, he’d just kind of
assimilated himself into the Pittsburgh gay scene.

“Can I answer your question now?”
“Oh, shit. Yeah, sorry, Joey,” Jason said.

“I’m going to be in the building, in the family lounge. If Vlad can get to me before he starts

talking, great.” He glanced at Vlad. “But I could totally understand if he just blurted it out.”

“If you decide you can’t do it, Vlad, don’t worry about it,” Patrick said. “We will keep your

secret until you feel comfortable sharing it. You shouldn’t feel like you owe anybody anything. This is
your life, no one else’s.”

“He’s right, baby,” Joey said.
Vlad took a deep breath. “No. I want to do this. I’m going to be here in Pittsburgh as long as the

team doesn’t trade me, and I don’t want to have to sneak around all the time. I am sick of it.”

“I wish we could be there with you.”
Now Vlad laughed. “Yeah, but both your teams are still in the playoff race.”
“You guys will get back there,” Jason reassured him. “You’re too talented not to, even though it

pains me to say so.”

“Are you talking about me or the team?”
Vlad’s tone was playful, as was Jason’s, and Joey could kiss Jason and Patrick for putting his

man at ease. He’d seen pictures of both of them after the bus crash during the Olympics, and both
were good-looking men. Joey wasn’t into group sex, though, since he was pretty sure he’d rip the head
off any guy who got too close to Vlad.

“I guess I’d have to ask Joey how talented you personally are.” Joey heard another whack.
“Ignore him,” Patrick said. “All the kid thinks about is sex.”
“My kinda guy,” Joey murmured.
Vlad chuckled. “So, any tips?”
“Shit, I dunno,” Jason answered. “I mean, we didn’t exactly choose to out ourselves.”
“We didn’t have any plans to come out publicly, in fact,” Patrick added. “But I will say this, and

listen carefully, Vlad. There’s nothing wrong with you, no matter what anyone else says. Rely on the
support of your partner and your friends, and fuck the rest.”

“I’ll try. Thanks for talking to me.”
“Anytime,” Jason said. “Hey, maybe the four of us could get together sometime this summer?

We don’t live too far apart.”

“That would be fun.”
Vlad smiled at him, and Joey wanted to crawl right inside the man’s skin. Shit, he loved this guy

so much it was nauseating. He smiled back.

They hung up, and after moving into the bedroom, Joey gave Vlad a nice rubdown with a happy

ending before curling up behind the sleepy man, flinging an arm around his waist and kissing the back
of his neck. “Everything will be okay, baby. And don’t ever forget. I’m here. You aren’t alone.”

“I love you.”
“Ditto, babe.” Joey rubbed his nose on the ticklish spot where Vlad’s neck met his shoulder.

“Now go to sleep.”

Chapter Ten

Vlad was sure he was gonna lose his breakfast. Why in the hell was he doing this? He’d already

hastily packed his bag, just in case things really got out of hand. Pat knew Vlad was going to lure the
media out into the hall, so Joey could be there when he dropped his bomb, and had passed the message
on to the other guys who knew the truth about them. They caught his eye occasionally, offering
encouraging smiles, and Vlad turned toward his locker, taking a deep breath.

Pivoting, he called out, “Is it possible for you press guys to come out in the hall? I have a

statement I want to make.”

The team’s PR guy, Chris, paled. “Vlad? Do I know about this?”
“No.” Vlad walked out the door before he lost his nerve. He coughed loudly—the signal he and

Joey had worked out for lack of something better—and Joey walked out of the lounge, taking up a spot
a little ways down the hall. When Vlad turned to face the media, who were now assembled in a clump
with their notebooks and minirecorders at the ready, he was assaulted by the lights from the tops of
the cameras. Vlad took a deep breath and then another.

Pat appeared at his side and put a hand on his shoulder. “You got this, bud.”
All the guys who’d been at Pat’s house the other night were there, along with several of his other

teammates, who no doubt were wondering what the hell was going on.

“I have something to read. Afterward I will answer some questions. Please let me finish first,

though.” He took the slip of paper from the pocket of his shorts. Without looking up again, he began to
read what Joey had helped him write earlier.

“This past year has been a nightmare for me in many ways. I will not address the Olympics, but I

will say it was what set off a chain of events which have been both the worst times and the best times
of my life. You may not be aware, but I was recently honored with permanent citizenship by the
United States. In the process, I denounced my citizenship of Russia. Apparently the Russian Hockey
Federation was not made aware of my change in citizenship, despite my personally sending a message
to the Federation, and invited me to become part of the Russian team for the World Championships.”

Vlad took a breath, not daring to look up. “I have advised the Russian Hockey Federation I am no

longer a Russian citizen and have no intention of playing for any Russian team in international play.
That by itself is not news. I realize this. But there’s more to the story, so please be patient with me. As
you may know, Russia recently passed a series of antigay laws, making everything from wearing a
rainbow pin to simply holding a partner’s hand in public a crime. I cannot ignore this archaic,
barbarian viewpoint of my former country, because I am a gay man.”

He waited for the murmurs to die down, still not daring to look up, afraid he’d run if he paid too

much attention to what was going on around him. “Yes, I am a gay man, and I’m also a proud citizen
of the United States of America, where I will not be arrested for expressing my love for my partner,
Joey.” Now he looked up and smiled in Joey’s direction, watching as the cameras pivoted almost as
one to take in his boyfriend, who stood proudly and stared back at the throng of reporters. “As I said, I
will answer limited questions, but not about the events at the Olympics.” Finally done reading, he
pushed the paper back into his shorts and ran a hand through his hair, trying to calm his stuttering
heart.

The questions started immediately.
“How long have you known you were gay?”
“How long have you and Joey been together?”

“Were you gay at the Olympics?”
He had a hard time not rolling his eyes.
Vlad motioned for everyone to quiet down. Joey moved closer, and Vlad turned to him, slipping

his hand into Joey’s when he stopped at his side and squeezed his hand. “I will answer the questions as
I understand them. I guess I knew I was gay for a long time, but I refused to allow myself to admit it.
It was only after the Olympics it became clear to me that I would never be attracted to women.” He
squeezed Joey’s hand again. “Joey and I have been together around four months, and he’s been the
person who made me believe I wasn’t a freak, that my feelings were what they were and could not and
should not be pushed away any longer.”

The cameras swung again when Pat and Tyler stepped forward.
“Were you aware of your teammate’s sexuality?”
“What are your thoughts on playing with a gay teammate?”
Tyler frowned. “We didn’t know until a few days ago, when Vlad felt comfortable enough to tell

a few of us. As far as thoughts on playing with a gay teammate, I can only speak for myself, but I’m
happy Vlad can finally be himself and he’s found someone who makes him happy. He’s a great hockey
player and a good friend. That’s all that matters to me.”

One by one, Vlad’s teammates, with the exception of a few who seemed to be standing in

astonished silence, echoed Tyler’s sentiments. Vlad had no idea if he could believe the things some of
them were saying, since it was probable at least a few were playing to the cameras, but it was still nice
to hear.

His coach pushed to the front of the throng. “As Vlad’s coach, I support him on the ice. As for

what he does off the ice, it’s none of my business or anyone else’s.” He looked at Vlad, sympathy
clear in his eyes. Leaning closer, he asked under his breath, “You wanna get out of here? We’ll cover
you.”

“No, I’m not running. I’m not hiding.”
“Good man.” He clasped Vlad’s shoulder briefly before moving back a step.
“Who is your boyfriend? Tell us more about him,” one of the local television reporters asked.
“Joey works at the airport, helping with plane maintenance. He also served proudly for six years

in the United States Army Delta Force.” More murmurs, and Vlad had to hold back a smile. Yeah, my
man’s a badass . “He would never tell you this himself, but he is a highly decorated veteran, and I am
proud to call him mine.” He turned to Joey, and a look passed between them before he returned his
attention to the press assemblage. “I think we’re done here. Thank you for being patient during a very
difficult situation for me.”

Despite the protests of the press, he and Joey walked away.
“I am so proud of you, baby,” Joey said as soon as they’d turned the corner and were away from

the prying eyes of the crowd behind them. He kissed Vlad hard. “I love you.”

“I love you too. Let’s call Jason and Patrick and then spend the rest of the day in bed.”
“Sounds like a damn fine plan to me.”

Cassandra Carr

Cassandra Carr is a multi-published, award-winning erotic romance writer with Loose Id, Siren,

Sybarite Seductions, and Ellora's Cave, who lives in Western New York with her husband, Inspiration,
and her daughter, Too Cute for Words. When not writing she enjoys watching hockey and hanging out
on Twitter. Cassandra's book Caught was recently named Best BDSM Book 2011 by
LoveRomancesCafe and her book Impact was named May 2012’s Book of the Month by BDSM Book
Reviews.

For more information about Cassandra, check out these links:
Main website:

http://www.booksbycassandracarr.com

Facebook fan page:

http://www.facebook.com/AuthorCassandraCarr

Twitter:

http://www.twitter.com/Cassandra_Carr

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