The Professor Returns, Part One
DNA: Someone asked that I also post this here at DWG, so here we are. This is a short story that will be in four or five parts (depending on a few decisions I am still making.) I have no fixed posting schedule as of yet, but I will do my best to be regular. RA
BLURB: Elizabeth Bennet learns not only her chosen field from her mentors, but how to love, lose and gain the most important things in life.
The Professor Returns, Part One
Elizabeth Bennet chose to study at Netherfield for one reason and one reason alone, Professor Ellison Phillips. He was the country's authority in the field of____. He even knew Professor Edward Gardiner, the world's utmost expert, and with whom she really desired to study. Professor Gardiner's reputation made it difficult to get into one of his classes let alone into Longbourn College. You had to be nominated to the entrance committee and sponsored by a renowned member in the field to even be considered.
Elizabeth's grades and thesis work got her into Netherfield easily. She was only one of seven women in the world who dared to challenge the male dominated field. Unlike the other women who made it this far in their studies, Elizabeth had something none of them had -- personality and beauty. She was a beautiful woman with a spark and an IQ.
Many men admired Elizabeth but few would ask her out on a date let alone think of a relationship. Most couldn't keep up with her mind and those that could were intimidated by her physical appearance. At 20 years of age, Elizabeth had only been on three honest-to-goodness dates. Sure there were the "group" set-ups her sister Jane would arrange, but those never led to anything even though Jane was careful to pick the type of guys that Lizzy dreamed of -- tall, dark and handsome. There were plenty of that type around, but most were shallow and though some were highly intelligent, they didn't seem to want a woman that could challenge them intellectually. Therefore, Elizabeth decided to forgo finding love and romance and dedicate her life one hundred percent to her studies.
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At the end of her first year at Netherfield, Elizabeth was at the top of her class. Professor Phillips decided to take this lovely wonder under his wing and mentor her as he had only a few top students in the past.
Elizabeth's excitement at the opportunity drove her to bouts of nervous energy and she would be found in the lab well into the hours of the evening. Professor Phillips many times would have to drag her from the facility and send her home. He soon started dragging her home where he and his wife began to look upon her as a daughter.
"You know, Elizabeth, you aren't the first student my husband has had to rescue from overworking themselves.' Mrs. Phillips revealed. "Though I must say that most students do know when to go home, though there was one other student who was like you."
Elizabeth smiled at Professor and Mrs. Phillips and said, "Really? So I'm not the only glutton for punishment."
"No, dear. You remind me very much of William. Does she not you, Ellis?" Mrs. Phillips asked her husband as she poured him more tea and placed a slice of pie on his dessert plate.
The professor smiled and nodded. Elizabeth noticed that his smile though warm was a little sad and wistful and his eyes took a faraway look. She dearly wanted to know what student could inspire such emotion in the face of the otherwise stogie professor.
Afraid to ask for any details that may open some sort of wound, for why else would he seem so sad, she simply asked, "William?"
"Mmm. William." Mrs. Phillips seemed the only one will to speak. The professor maintained his sad countenance. "He was a student here a few years back. Poor boy, lost both his parents in an accident and became the guardian to his young sister. I swear he would live in that lab if Ellis didn't drag him out."
"How sad. Whatever happened to him?" Now Lizzy understood the emotions on the professor's face.
"Oh, he graduated with honors and left to study with Edward Gardiner. He has made a name for himself to be sure. His research work has been published many times and his sister is starting college this year. Pemberley, majoring in English Literature."
"That's a good school. Is he still studying with Professor Gardiner?" Elizabeth replied quickly wanting to know more about this student who obviously was good enough to study with the renowned Edward Gardiner.
Professor Phillips looked over and studied Elizabeth excitement at the mention of her intellectual idol. He couldn't help but let out a low chuckle which made Lizzy turn and focus her attention onto him.
"Yes, Elizabeth. He is still with Edward, but he is no longer his pupil. He is his associate." There was no need for Phillips to elaborate. He knew that Elizabeth knew the name of Edward Gardiner's associate. He was almost as famous as Gardiner himself.
"Professor Darcy! You're talking about Professor William Darcy?"
"One in the same, my dear. One in the same." It was Mrs. Phillips turn to chuckle. "Have you heard from William this week, Ellis? You know, Elizabeth, he is sort of like the son we never had. He calls us every week and we see him and Georgiana on most holidays."
"Who's .... ?" Elizabeth trailed off her question. She had gotten so caught up in the excitement over hearing of persons who's careers were legendary to her that she forgot to allow Professor Phillips to answer his wife's question.
The professor rose from his seat and smiled at the sweet young face that was shining with curiosity and awe. "Yes, Rachel, my love. I talked to him just this morning. He told me to give you his greetings and he promised to consider the regents' offer. He also said that he would bring Georgiana to visit us during her holiday break." He then turned to Elizabeth and winked, "Georgiana is his sister."
Elizabeth's mouth formed an 'o' and her face flushed with embarrassment. She felt like a shy teenager caught digging for information about her favorite rock star. She was dying to know what the board of regents was offering the field's newest star researcher, but she dared not to ask.
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Elizabeth tamed her time in the lab but was still occasionally rescued by the Phillips's. Her work was exemplary and she hoped beyond hope that she would at least be considered to attend Longbourn, even if she didn't get to study with the famed Edward Gardiner.
Midway through her second year, Professor Phillips called her to his office and informed her that he had nominated her to attend Longbourn and that she had been accepted. She sat stunned, but almost fainted when the professor informed her that he also wrote her a letter of recommendation to study with Professor Gardiner, but she would have to finish out the rest of the year with a superb presentation and perfect grade. She could do nothing but fly to her feet and hug the man who so reminded her of her own father.
"That's a good girl!" He said. "Now, I am to bring you home with me for celebratory dinner. Come."
Elizabeth and the Phillips's feasted on a fine dinner prepared by the professor's wife.
"Well, this is a day to celebrate, my dear Ellis. Our little Elizabeth will be going onto Longbourn and our William will be coming back to Netherfield." Rachel Phillips smiled proudly at her husband.
"Professor Darcy is coming Netherfield?" Lizzy confusedly asked.
"Yes, Elizabeth. One more semester and I will be retiring. William will be taking over for me. Both Edward and I are thrilled with this. He has learned the best from both of us and has added his own accomplishments to make him the finest choice. It won't be long and Edward will retire as well. We wanted the best to carry on what we started. William is the man to do it. You know, dear one, you may give that boy a run for his money sometime in the future." The professor finished with a wink.
"Are you going home for the holiday, Elizabeth?" ask Mrs. Phillips
"Yes, I leave day after tomorrow." Sadness filled Lizzy's voice. The thought of Ellison Phillips retiring seemed strange. She looked him in the face and saw that his features had grown very tired since the first time she saw him almost two years ago. When had he grown so old?
As she left that evening, Elizabeth hugged her mentor with a little extra love. She turned back to her surrogate parents as she opened her car door, brought her hand to her mouth, kissed it and blew it to them. Though her voice was soft, they heard her, "I love you both" as she entered her car.
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Elizabeth returned to Longbourn after the holiday in wonderful spirits. The month holiday had been a happy one with her sisters and parents. And now it was time to get back to the studies she loved.
She knew this was to be Professor Phillips's last semester, and she was going to use it to ask all the questions she could before she moved onto the next part of her dream. She felt she would always have the Phillips's to turn to just as she had in last two years. Maybe even more as they would be retired and had more time on their hands.
Her class with Professor Phillips was at 10:00 a.m. and she had to almost sprint across the quad to make in time after her 8:30 class on the other side of the campus. She was anxious to see him, she was therefore quite surprised not to see Professor Phillips standing at the podium in the lecture hall when she arrived.
She took her assigned seat as did everyone else and waited for the professor to appear. She looked over to the doorway upon hearing two men ending a discussion. She recognized older bald man as Professor Rogers, but she did not know the identity of the younger man.
Her eyes remained on the younger man as he strode toward the podium. He was the most handsome man she had ever seen. He was tall with dark, curly hair and the most striking brown eyes. Her heart skipped a beat and after a few moments realized that her jaw was hanging open. She closed her mouth with a snap just as Professor Rogers addressed the students.
"I have some sad news to relate to you all this morning."
The Professor Returns, Part Two
How could this of happened? Elizabeth was devastated. She sat stunned for some time, not knowing what to feel, not knowing how to act. She became aware of things around her again as a quiet echo of a voice slowly penetrated her being.
Professor Rogers's crisp voice became clear and captured what of her attention that was possible for her at that moment.
"There will be a memorial service in the auditorium tonight at 7:00 p.m. for any of that would like to attend. There will be a small reception following with refreshments."
Elizabeth noticed Professor Rogers glance at the younger man who was still standing at the podium leafing through pages of what looked to be Professor Phillips' class notes. He turned to Professor Rogers and shook of his head.
Professor Rogers obviously knew this attractive young man, but Elizabeth couldn't ever remember seeing him before. And why was he going through Professor Phillips' notes? She felt an instant invasion of privacy for the now deceased professor.
Rogers nodded his silent communication to the younger man who turned and retreated through the door that led to the lab.
Elizabeth heard Rogers cancel the day's class and lab. Mechanically she rose and left the lecture hall wondering what she would do for the rest of the day.
She couldn't help but peer through the small window in the door to the lab as she slowly walked down the hall. The striking young man sat at the demonstration table with his head buried in his hands. As if he knew he was being watched, he lifted his head and turned toward the door. Elizabeth was startled to see that he was unabashedly shedding tears.
Suddenly, he pulled his eyes away from hers, and looked off into the lab. He pulled something from his pocket and, though she couldn't hear him, she knew he spoke but a few words. Another man appeared in front of him and took what was offered.
This other man seemed vaguely familiar, but she couldn't place where she had seen him before. He was older, not quite as old as Professor Phillips had been but not far from it. He wasn't very tall nor short and slightly overweight. His face seemed friendly and his eyes were sad and tired.
Elizabeth didn't realize that she was staring at the two men until the older starting walking toward the door. She wanted to run feeling as if she were intruding on something very private, but the man moved too quickly for her shocked being to react.
The door opened. "Miss Elizabeth Bennet?"
"Yes?"
Holding his hand out in greeting, the gentleman said, "Miss Bennet, I'm Edward Gardiner."
Obviously the famed professor was there to attend the memorial service, but how did he know her name? Elizabeth was stunned. Not knowing really what she should do, she allowed her subconscious to take over and reached for his hand.
"We found this letter addressed to you that Rachel apparently wrote. I suppose she didn't have the chance to mail it or maybe she was waiting for you to return to school. But William," the esteemed gentleman gestured into the lab, "felt that we should get it to you before the bank locked up the house for probate."
She nodded and looked at the package that he held. Wondering why a letter would be in a box, Elizabeth quizzically up at the professor's gentle face.
"William put some photographs he found in Ellis's study. He thought that you would like to keep them."
She took the box from his hand and looked inside. There was the letter and several photos from various times Elizabeth had been at the Phillips's house and one from the award ceremony where she had been presented with the top honor for her latest work.
Tears streamed down her face and she could only murmur a quiet, "Thank you" before resuming her retreat down the hall.
"You will be at the service tonight?" Professor Gardiner called after her.
Elizabeth couldn't speak but did manage a nod.
Some how Elizabeth made it back to her room and fell onto her bed and read the letter Rachel Phillips had written to her Christmas day.
Dearest Elizabeth,
This has been a wonderful holiday. The only thing that would have made it better is if you were with us as well. Ellis and I look upon you as if you were one of our own, but we know that you must spend time with your own family.
William is here along with Georgiana. She is such a sweet girl, but terribly shy. If you were here, I know that you would have her talking a mile a minute.
With you off to Longbourn, we would be so very lonesome so it will be so very wonderful to have William back with us again. He is to stay with here with us and I have his room all ready.
Listen to me go on about nonsense! I just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you on this glorious holiday and miss you terribly.
With love,
Rachel (and Ellis too)
The letter only made the tears fall more rapidly and Elizabeth didn't even try to make them stop.
Professors Gardiner and Darcy delivered the eulogies with eloquence. It was only when she saw him standing in front of the congregation did Elizabeth realize that Professor William Darcy was the young, strikingly handsome man who let his tears fall like rain that morning in the lab.
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Months had passed since the automobile accident that took the Phillips's lives and both Elizabeth and William dealt with their grief and functioned as they should day after day.
Though Elizabeth saw Professor Darcy every day during the semester, she never spoke to him other than to answer or ask questions in class. But she felt connected to him unlike anyone ever before. Not even the closeness she shared with her family or with Professor and Mrs. Phillips matched this feeling.
Sometimes she would catch herself staring at Darcy's beautifully handsome face and watched with rapt attention when he would return the stare.
As she sat eating her lunch in the cafeteria one day, she smiled at how she had imagined what Professor Darcy looked like before seeing him that awful day. She thought him to be short, no taller than she and had stringy hair. His heavy rimmed spectacles would be taped on the arm near his ear. And he would have some nervous habit like chewing his pencil or tapping his fingers on the table. She took a bite from her apple and wrote these thoughts down in a letter to her sister, Jane.
She finished her lunch and her letter to Jane and trotted across the student union lawn toward the library. Elizabeth found herself roam in the stacks until she stopped in front of the sign that marked the "Student Works" section. Shyly she directed herself to the "D" aisle and stood and stared at the spines of the research works of William Darcy. Fourteen, it was an impressive amount for a student. She herself had only two where most students would be lucky to have one.
It was at that moment that she decided to find out everything possible about her instructor, Professor William Darcy.
The Professor Returns, Part Three
Elizabeth spent all of her free time dedicated to her new quest. Not only was she feeling energized over her crusade, but it dulled the pain from the loneliness left by the Phillips's passing.
"Well, if I ere to fail as a researcher, I could always start a new career as a private investigator!" she smiled as she mused over the improbable possibility.
The more she learned about Darcy, the more riveted she became during his lectures. She realized that he not only knew what Professor Phillips had known about _____, but also what Professor Gardiner knew as well and what amazing new discoveries he uncovered on his own.
Some of what Elizabeth ascertained about this amazing young man was that he a recorded IQ of 185 and was a true polymath. He started studying college level courses at the age of eight and was an accomplished pianist to boot. He published first work first paper at the tender age of fifteen and held degrees in physics, mathematics and music.
All this combined with his physical appearance gave one to believe that the man had it all. But Elizabeth knew better. She discerned that his parents, though both from families of means, were near penniless. Though William's exceptional mind was an incentive for many higher learning institutions to provide some financial aid to the young genius, it wasn't something George and Anne Darcy exploited. Both parents worked hard to provide the best for William and Georgiana.
At the age of twenty, William Darcy lost his parents as a result of the negligence of of a drunk driver and the studious and reserved prodigy became the sole provider and caretaker of a thirteen year-old sister.
Piecing many of the stories Rachel and Ellison Phillips told her, Elizabeth now understood how William worked many odd jobs, including one as a pianist to entertain customers shopping in a high-end department store, to pay the rent for a small studio apartment for he and his sister to live in.
This was about the time Professor Phillips took William under his wing after rescuing him from late nights in the lab. The Phillips's moved the siblings into their comfortable four-bedroom home and gave them the gift of a stable home with surrogate parents. The Darcy's remained with the Phillips's until William was accepted to Longbourn.
After an unprecedented one year, William Darcy became Professor Gardiner's associate and was able to rent a modest home.
Once his sister started Pemberley College, Darcy felt more freedom and both Professor Phillips and Professor Gardiner felt it was time to give William full control of the department at Netherfield. He was more than qualified intellectually and, with his social skills now honed from his duties as his sister's guardian as well as Associate Professor of ____ at Longbourn, ready to tackle every day interactions with students, colleagues, and parents.
The emotional blow of losing his surrogate parents and taking the responsibilities of the _____ department at Netherfield a semester early, left Darcy more reticent than his normal. He was lively enough in the lecture hall or the lab, but kept to himself in the cafeteria and would seek harbor in corners during campus instructor/student socials, if he showed up at all!
Elizabeth couldn't find fault with him for that however. She, herself, rarely attended the socials unless she knew for sure that Professor Darcy would be attending. The only difference between the two was that Elizabeth tended to be more amiable to her classmates and professors.
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It was no surprise to learn that Ellison Phillips willed his house and possessions to Darcy.
Elizabeth found herself strolling through the park adjacent to the familiar home on many occasions. She tried to convince herself it was to be near the spirit of the Phillips's. But she knew deep down inside that it was to near him. Somewhere along the way of finding out all she could about the learned man who challenged her every day, she began feeling more than what a student should feel for her Professor. It wasn't fatherly or brotherly. It was something more alluring, something romantic.
See would see him sitting on the porch swing and imagine that she would be sitting with him, not only sharing the swing but a life with him. She imagined dancing with him in the front room and what it would be like to kiss him. What would it be like to be married to him, to have his children.
She knew that he had seen her in the park. She tried to act like she was studying or watching others in the park, but she felt that he somehow knew she was there for him.
She could have a relationship with Professor Phillips and his wife, that was like family. The type of family-like relationship she wanted with Darcy would cause both of them problems. She knew this, but it didn't stop her from wanting it. She wondered if he ever thought about her, but supposed that if he did, it would be as another sister. Had she been able to read his mind from across the park as they took turns staring at one another, she would have known that he thought very much the way she did.
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The semester ended far too quickly for both Elizabeth and William.
Elizabeth was at the top of her class with perfect marks. She was the first recipient of the Elllison Phillips Award for Excellence and when she accepted the award from Professor Darcy, her eyes filled with tears to the point he had to assist her back to her seat.
He had given her his handkerchief to dry her eyes before he returned back the presenters table. She didn't have the opportunity to return it to him as he left before the reception. And it soon became as treasured a possession as the award itself.
The last day of the semester found Elizabeth pulling all her grade slips from her student mailbox along with a note to report to Professor Darcy's office before 2:00 p.m.
She arrived at the office wing of the _____ Department at precisely 1:40 p.m. and she slowly approached Darcy's office where the door was standing wide open.
Elizabeth looked in and saw Professor Darcy sitting at his desk intently reading. She knocked on the door jam and as he looked up, she said, "I received a note that I was suppose to report her before two?" She held up the note.
"Ah, yes, Miss Bennet. I have something that you will need for your admissions packet to Longbourn." He stood and picked up a folded piece of paper from the desk and placed it in an envelope. "It is the letter of recommendation that Professor Phillips wrote for you for Professor Gardiner's class. I have added mine as well."
He walked over toward her and handed her the envelope.
"Thank you." She stared at the envelope and her shoes, too nervous to look at the man that had her heart tied up in knots, especially with him standing only inches from her.
"I was wondering..." his voice cracked slightly, "if you wouldn't mind takings this package to Professor Gardnier for me?"
"Of course!" She snapped her head up looking him straight in the eye and both stood there staring at the other until a the sound of a car backfire just outside woke them from their gaze.
He handed her the package what amounted to a large leather envelope with a lock.
"This must be important. Are you sure that you want me to take it?" She asked just a bit wary of something happening to some important research while in her care.
"I can't think of anyone that I trust more to care this, Miss Bennet." His eyes were warm with feeling and he offered her a slight smile.
She returned the smile with a blush and a nervous upturn of her lips.
"It has been a pleasure having you in class, Miss Bennet. I'm sure you will enjoy your time with Professor Gardiner. He is a fine man and a good friend. I know that you will do well." When he finished speaking, Professor Darcy held out his hand.
She took his hand and said softly, "Thank you ... for everything."
They stood, her hand in his and, again, stared at each other until he finally said, "Well, I must be leaving now. I am to pick up my sister by four and if I don't leave now, I'll be late. Again, Miss Bennet, it has been a pleasure."
She nodded and left his office.
Elizabeth met Professor Rogers on the lawn just outside the faculty offices and they exchanged farewells as Professor Darcy exited the building and entered his car. As he drove away, Elizabeth lamented the fact that she probably would never see him again.
Chapter Fifteen
Lizzy was nearing her parents' house when she realized the enormity of Lydia's actions and calculated exactly how catastrophic the results would be for all involved. Her family would be devastated, her standing as a MP whose party promoted family values would be ruined, and most of all....most of all...she was convinced that Will would never want to speak to her again. For the second time during the car journey she found herself crying, a thing which deeply aggravated her. Why should she be concerned over Will? He was only a man, only one man in a world which held many others. But it was because she loved him, because his house had felt so much like her own home, that she was so saddened, and her fury at her youngest sister's actions, at that moment, knew no bounds.
Jane was waiting at the front door as she arrived. Lizzy immediately noticed that something was wrong with her sister, her appearance was haggard and some of her optimism seemed to have fled from her, but she would not ask. Not now.
“Oh, Lizzy! What are we going to do? Dad's phoned the police but, but what if they can't find her?”
“Don't worry, everything will be fine, you'll see.” She embraced her sister and let her cry on her shoulder. She had the impression that Jane had been putting up a brave face for the rest of the family. “How's mum?”
“She's not really coping. She won't come out of her room, won't even get up.” Lizzy dug deep into her jacket pocket and produced one rather crumpled tissue and handed it to Jane.
“Well, now that I'm here she'll have something else to talk about.”
“What would that be?”
“My lack of a partner. Not very surprising though.” They began to walk into the house, Lizzy carrying her travelling bag over her shoulder. Jane noticed this and questioned her about it.
“Have you been somewhere?”
“What?”
“Your bag. You never bring that bag home. You've been somewhere.” Lizzy felt herself redden against her will. “You do have a boyfriend!”
“Jane, that is, that is the most absurd thing that I have ever heard come out of your mouth. Really. I mean, the only people I get to talk to are 'stuffy old politicians'. The majority of whom aren't very nice to look at.”
“Lizzy!”
“Come on, lead the way to the mother ship.”
Their mother's room was every bit as messy and floral as Lizzy had remembered it, but the atmosphere this time was decidedly different. The rose patterned duvet cover was drawn up round Mrs Bennet's shoulders and she was in grave danger of getting lost in there entirely.
“Mum! Lizzy's here.”
“Oh, Elizabeth Bennet! See what you have done! Lydia would never have done this if you had not been so rebellious.”
“What?”
“All that nonsense your father has been filling your head with! Whatever happened to the time when women were content to marry and raise a family. I never needed a job and my life was fine before all that political mumbo-jumbo.” So the wailing continued, all the while Lizzy sat in a chair beside her mother's bed, biting her lip. Surely it would do no good to provoke her mother even more.
“Where's dad?”
“Your father went to that hell hole London to try and find Lydia and that horrible Wickham man! Goodness knows what'll happen to him!” And so started another burst of tears. Lizzy really didn't have the patience to put up with this, luckily Jane was there to stop her saying or doing anything to make the situation worse.
“Mum, maybe we should let Lizzy settle in, get unpacked. We'll be back up in a minute.”
Their mother let out a disgruntled sigh, “Why do you need to help her? She's perfectly capable of doing it herself.” Lizzy shot her mother a covert dirty look. “But if she really must have someone then Kitty, you go.” Kitty, to be perfectly frank, looked relieved to be granted an escape from that room and her mother.
They were soon in Lizzy's old room - she didn't think living out of the house would go down too well with her mum so she had stayed here for the moment - and Kitty immediately flopped down onto the bed.
“What's the matter with Jane? She seems very-”
“She's moping.”
“Why? I know that the Lydia thing is hard on her but..” Kitty interrupted yet again.
“It's not that. It's Charles Bingley - he's dumped her.”
Lizzy dropped a jumper she was unpacking onto the floor and then sat down beside her sister. She couldn't believe it! The few times that she'd been able to see them together she'd always presumed that the two of them were in love with each other - Jane, she knew, had definitely been affected by that madness - and she had been so sure that he had been as well. Gosh, what her sister must be feeling right now.
“He just sent her an e-mail. Couldn't phone, couldn't come in person. Said he was too busy in London.” They sat quietly, Lizzy still in a state of disbelief. “I think it was his sisters. I mean, he was like so into her and....I don't know. It's really strange.”
That made sense; his sisters had influenced him.
“Probably some of his snobby friends had a say too. Didn't you say that some of those politicians were completely up themselves?” Kitty's words had long since become inaudible to Lizzy's ears.
Snobby friends...
It couldn't be.
No.
It wouldn't be.
He wouldn't do it.
Would he?
“Lizzy? Lizzy? Oi!” Kitty whacked her on the arm.
“Ow! What'd you do that for?” Lizzy rubbed her arm and glared at her sister, concern over who exactly may have advised Bingley momentarily left behind.
“You were totally out of it. Jane says that tea's here.”
“Oh, ok. Tell her I'll be down soon. You can go, I'll just finish unpacking.” Kitty looked unsure, but soon her older sister shooed her out of the room anyway and so she went down to greet the pizza man. According to Kitty, fast food was becoming a firm fixture in the Bennet household.
I wonder if Will's managed to get proper food yet.
No, she wouldn't think of that. Not when his name was now so utterly associated with Jane's unhappiness.
She felt a pang of sadness and bitterness inside her and could sense the rage building up. Scowling, she grabbed her jumper and chucked it into a nearby drawer which slammed as she shoved it closed.
“Lizzy! Pizza'll get cold!”
“Coming!” Her reply was terser than she would have liked.
But then, maybe junk food and ice cream would do her good after all.
---
Dinner was over and Lizzy had run up to her room again, with the ruse of unpacking. In truth, she was obsessing about what she believed to be true - how could he do that? How dare he? What gave him the right?
A knock interrupted her inner rant and Jane hesitantly came in.
“What?”
“Sorry, I'll come back later.”
Lizzy put her head into her hands, trying to blink the tears back at the same time.
“Lizzy? What's the matter?” Jane rushed to her sister's side and pulled her into a hug. That was the final straw for Lizzy, and she just leant into her elder sister's embrace and let out all the tears she had been holding back.
“Oh Jane, Jane, this is awful.” She felt guilty; surely Jane was the one who should be in tears, not her. But then, she couldn't stop it.
“You don't have to tell me anything, but -”
“It's Will.”
“Will?”
“Will Darcy, you know - Charles' best friend.” She felt a bit, well a lot, guilty at bringing Bingley's name into the conversation, but it was done now and Jane would have to get used to the pain. “Men are stupid. They're stupid. Big, stupid men.”
“I know.”
“And Will's like the most stupid of all the stupid men in all of the stupid male dominated universe.”
“What's he done Lizzy? You're scaring me.”
She couldn't tell Jane - wouldn't tell Jane - what Will had done regarding her relationship with Bingley, but she found that she did have enough strength to divulge some of the information about what had happened between them. Her sister listened in silence throughout the whole account, occasionally tightening her grip on Lizzy's shoulders in an attempt to comfort her.
“Lizzy. Don't worry, everything'll be fine.”
“No, it won't! Will won't speak to me ever again and...” She took a deep breath and moved away from Jane's hug. “I wish I was as optimistic as you, Jane.”
The elder Bennet sister looked down at the floor and Lizzy could tell that she was thinking of Bingley. With the exception of a brief romance when she was in secondary school, Jane had never really been involved with many men and, as a result, had never faced this kind of betrayal before.
“I miss him. Charles, I mean.”
“I know.”
“I...Lizzy, I think I love him.”
This time it was Lizzy's turn to offer support to her sister. “Jane, just keep one thought in your mind.”
“What's that?”
“Men are stupid.”
The Professor Returns, Part Four
Finishing up her fourth and final year at Longbourn, Elizabeth thought of all she had learned and all the advances that had been made since she first decided her course of study. Most of the new discoveries had come from the mind of William Darcy and she smiled knowing she was one of the few who know him to be a real person and not just a fantastic intelligence.
Professor Gardiner spoke often of the young man who was still listed as Associate Professor at Longbourn. Even today, the last day of the semester and the last day before his retirement, Edward Gardiner sat and reviewed the timeline of development. It was plain to see that most of the research came from the last eight to ten years and most from the diligence of Professor Darcy.
Again, the question of why Darcy was listed as an Associate Professor at Longbourn but never seen was raised by one of the students who had transferred from somewhere other than Netherfield. Instead of giving the traditional smile as an answer, Professor Gardiner rose from his seat at his desk and walked over and sat on the corner of the demonstration table. He stared at the faces before him, stopping at Elizabeth. He smiled and gave her a slight wink as if she were in on the mystery.
Though Elizabeth had no idea why William Darcy was still listed as faculty, she did know how he spent his Christmas holiday, spring break and various other days. Professor Gardiner seemed to be even more a mother hen than the Phillips's had been. He would often go on about Darcy's coming and goings to Elizabeth and vice versa. His wife, Madelyn, would scold him from time to time saying that he should leave the younger ones alone only to add to the stories in another breath.
"It seems that I'm not going to get away without that being asked that even on my final day!" Professor Gardiner exclaimed in a voice that sound aggravated but the smile on his face told a different story. "Perhaps I should tell you a little about the man. Maybe then you will be able to figure it out."
Edward Gardiner seemed to drift off somewhere and, with a smile, he returned and began his story.
"Well, those of you that have had the privilege of learning from Professor Darcy could probably tell the others here exactly what it is like to learn from someone like William. He can teach anything and to anybody, which is an amazing feat from someone who seems to learn things just by breathing.
"When I first met William Darcy, he was twelve years old and just completing his second degree. He published his first research work when he was fifteen. He published quite a few more by the time he left Netherfield. Any of our Netherfielders want to volunteer how many?" There was no reply, so Professor Gardiner looked at Elizabeth. "Miss Bennet?"
"Fourteen."
"Yes, and this is a four year course is it not, Miss Bennet?"
"Yes, sir."
"How long did it take William Darcy to complete this course?" Professor Gardiner now stood in front of Elizabeth with a broad smile.
"One year." Elizabeth could help but blush by being singled out as the keeper of such knowledge.
"Well, no. But it is close enough. He actually finished in three semesters, but we couldn't offer him the associate position until after one year. He has been Associate Professor of ______ since then. And since I am retiring, he will be taking over for me.
"Both Longbourn and Netherfield have been associated since 1812 and when the _____ Department was created, Professor Ellison Phillips and I broke it into two sections of study: Dynamics at Netherfield and Practical Applications at Longbourn.
"We have had many students over the years and many have gone on to do many things. Most of our students have gone to work for companies with government affiliations and a few have gone into research with either private companies or on their own. But only one has continued his research and taught as well. That would be William Darcy. Hence, his name listed as Associate Professor here. Starting with the next semester, the entire department will be housed at Netherfield."
Elizabeth sat wide-eyed, though she had remembered Professor Phillips remarking on the fact that both he and Professor Gardiner had planned for Darcy to take over for them; she never really realized how it would come about. She didn't know how to react. She wasn't shocked, but rather lost. Her mentors were now either dead or retired and the man who could challenge her with questions and who secretly held her heart was all that was left.
Professor Gardiner loudly cleared his throat to halt the murmuring in the class. "Now, I would like to apologize to Miss Bennet."
Elizabeth's eyes darted about her wondering why the professor would want to apologize.
"You see, students, Miss Bennet holds a singular title."
Elizabeth sat up straighter in her seat and blushed at the attention though still confused on what the good professor was talking about.
"Sorry to embarrass you, Miss Bennet," the Professor smiled. "But as it happens, Miss Bennet is the ONLY student to study not only in my class but also with Professor Phillips and Professor Darcy. She is also the only one to hand me letters of recommendation from each of them. And I must say that you didn't disappoint any of us for you have finished top of the class for the fourth year in a row. So I would suggest you make it to the award ceremony Friday night, Miss Bennet. You are the winner of the Longbourn Achievement Medal."
The class roared with applause as everyone rose to congratulate a stunned Elizabeth.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Elizabeth left Longbourn not only with an impressive list of achievements to her record, but letters of recommendation from both Professor Gardiner and "Associate" Professor Darcy. She had been surprised with the letters as she had never requested a letter at all, but to get one from Darcy could only mean that Professor Gardiner was keeping him apprised of her progress.
It wasn't long before a prestigious research firm snatched Elizabeth Bennet up. She relocated to Meryton where she was but a few miles from her parents and sisters.
Elizabeth's job at Meryton Research, ________ Division was all that she hoped it would be. She was the only woman on the research team and, though it occasionally caused turned up noses from some of the newer male researchers, she found the work rewarding.
Nearly two and a half years after coming to work at MR, Elizabeth came to work to find the entire team abuzz with excitement.
"What's everyone so worked up about?" She asked as she donned her lab coat.
"We are to have another new researcher join the team! William Collins. He's an Associate Professor at Rosings College. I understand he has an impressive record," voiced one of her colleagues.
"Ah, I don't believe I've ever heard of him."
"Apparently, Professor de Bourgh recommended him." came an answer.
Elizabeth wasn't impressed. She knew that de Bourgh was famous for shoddy research work and in fact she remembered hearing Professor Gardiner on the telephone voicing his disgust to Professor Darcy.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
"This has been the longest six months of my life!" Elizabeth sighed over the telephone to her sister Jane.
"Lizzy, I understand your frustrations. That Collins fellow must be a real piece of work. I can understand your decision and I think you are doing the right thing. I think you will be much happier in the long run."
"Jane, you always know how to calm me. How are you? Is the baby kicking yet?"
"Oh, heavens, yes! This one is the most active yet! Little Charles and Thomas weren't so bad. I can image this one running from the moment it's born! Speaking of which, I have to go catch one from running outside now. I'll talk to you later."
Elizabeth smiled at the picture in her mind of a very pregnant Jane chasing after a running two year-old. She loved her nephews and knew she would love this new little one just as much, but she felt a little sad. She still remembered the children she imagined while at Netherfield. She knew what they would look like. All would have dark curly hair and dark eyes. But she had to give that dream up.
Shaking her head to bring her thoughts back to the present, Elizabeth e-mailed off her résumé now that she made her decision to leave Meryton Research.
This wasn't an easy decision for her. She loved her job, but the situation had come to a point where she had no choice.
William "Bill" Collins joined the team and instantly started touting Professor de Bourgh as if he were standing at a pulpit praising God. If that weren't bad enough, he decided that Elizabeth wasn't worthy of being on the research team merely because of her gender.
His tone suddenly changed when the team leader presented Elizabeth's credentials to him.
"My dear, Miss Elizabeth! You actually studied with Professors Phillips and Gardiner? Oh, and Professor Darcy! Those are achievements. Oh, and you are the E. Bennet that wrote Fundamentals and Dynamics of _______ During Base Testing ? I am impressed."
"Thank you. Now can we get back to doing our research, please?"
It was at that point that Bill Collins was determined to marry her and "propagate progeny of superior intelligence" and after almost six months of stalking her, he up and eloped with Charlotte Lucas, daughter of S. G. Lucas, president and CEO of Meryton Research. But that didn't stop his pursuit of Elizabeth; it only protected him from being fired. Come to find out, Charlotte was sterile and Collins desire to "propagate progeny of superior intelligence" was too great to leave Elizabeth alone.
Only a week after sending out her résumé, Elizabeth received an offer from Netherfield College. She had made an open application to the school after seeing they had two associate professorships available in the physics department. Though her expertise was in _____ , she was more than qualified for the physics associate position.
She didn't even ask how much the job paid, she just wanted to return to the school where she lost her heart and get as far away from Meryton Research and Bill Collins as she could.
She had heard about Darcy over the last few years. His discoveries never slowed, but she had no idea if he was still at Netherfield or if he had moved on. Edward Gardiner, who had been her Darcy oracle, spent his retired life traveling with his wife and other than an occasional post card from some forgotten corner of the earth, rarely heard from him.
"I'll just have to look Darcy up after I get there. I doubt that he will remember me and if he does, it will be as his "Phillips sister." Elizabeth couldn't imagine him ever thinking of her as anything more.
So with great determination, a box of possessions and a nice severance package, Elizabeth left Meryton Research to seek a small room to rent near Netherfield. She started her new job and her new life in two weeks.
The Professor Returns, Part Five
The last time Elizabeth stood on this campus, she was a student. Now she was to be the teacher. Professor Bennet. How well that sounded. Her thoughts returned to her last semester here, it was just before she transferred to study with Professor Gardiner at Longbourn College. It was the semester HE took over for Professor Phillips.
"The last time I saw him it was seven years ago. He handed me the letter of recommendation that Professor Phillips had left for me." Lizzy whispered to herself as she gazed up at the clock tower. Many questions went through her mind. Was he still there? Did he still look the same? Had he married?
Lizzy had spent that entire last semester imagining a life with Professor Darcy. He was tall, dark, handsome ... oh, so beautifully handsome! She learned everything she could about him, but never once spoke to him until that final day when she went to his office for the letter that Phillips left for her. He smiled at her, wished her luck.
So many years ago. He was perfect then, but now he was sure to be different. She pictured him married with an attractive wife and two children. She fed him well, so he would now have a few extra pounds around the middle. Even as she imagined him round and bald, he would still be attractive. To her, he could be nothing less.
"Oh, he probably left here for a more lucrative position long ago. Me and my silly dreams! Well, now to find my new office!"
Professor Bennet ascended the stairs to the second floor of the Phillips Building and scanned the doors for her name. When she found it, she smiled and ran her fingers across her name painted on the glass. She opened the door and entered the office. Upon her desk she noticed a vase of beautiful red roses and a card. The card read:
Professor Bennet,
If you need anything, seek me out. I'm directly across the hall.
~ WD
WD? Who was WD? The answer came almost immediately when a voice behind Lizzy said, "Welcome back."
Elizabeth turned and saw him. He hadn't change at all.
"Professor Darcy! You startled me." Elizabeth colored as she noticed the rather large grin on his face. She couldn't ever remember him smiling before. It only made him even more attractive.
"My apologies. I should have knocked." The smile on his face only half reflected the one in his heart as he noticed that she was even more beautiful than he remembered.
"Are these from you?" Elizabeth saw him nod in response, so she smiled and replied, "Thank you! It's nice to feel welcome."
Darcy looked as if he were about to say something when someone knocked on the door jam. Both occupants of the office turned and offered slightly irritated visages to the man with graying temples who stood at the door.
"Professor Darcy, I see you beat me here," he said with a chuckle and then directed the rest of his words to Elizabeth. "Professor Bennet, I presume? I'm Dr. Hurst and on behalf of board of regents, welcome. We'll let you get settled in here and then, if you would, meet with me and the rest of the board in let's say, an hour?"
"Of course, Dr. Hurst. It will be my pleasure."
"Good. I'm sure Darcy here will direct you to where we will be. Good morning to the both of you." Hurst turned and retreated only to be heard chuckling all the way down the hall.
Darcy rolled his eyes and with a smile for Elizabeth said, "I will be most happy to show to the administration building. I'll stop back by in 45 minutes. Is that all right?" She nodded while trying to examine his left hand for any ornamentation. "I will be just across the hall if you need anything."
He turned to leave only to stop at the door to ask, "Open or closed?"
"Oh! Open please. Thank you."
"You're quite welcome, Elizabeth." He turned and went into his own office where he elected to keep his door open as well.
"Did he just call me, 'Elizabeth'?" she thought as she blushed to her ears. "And I didn't see a ring!" Her smile grew and she was happy that she returned to Netherfield. Jane was right. She wasn't going to regret her decision.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Professor Darcy kept his promise to return in 45 minutes and escorted her to the administration offices. However, he had a meeting that he was already late for and couldn't wait for her to finish.
Her meeting with the regents only increased her happiness when she found out that faculty already on staff had filled the positions she had applied for and that the position she was to fill was for Associate Professor of ______. Darcy was to be her boss, her colleague and, she hoped, her friend. Her dream for anymore than that was still only a dream that she told herself she couldn't have.
Elizabeth went home to her small studio apartment happier than she ever thought she could be. She pulled out her framed photographs from a moving box that sat in her small living room and smiled at a photo of her and Professor Phillips.
Classes were to start in less than two weeks and the members of the ______ Department sat down for their first planning meeting. Elizabeth was introduced to what was now a rather impressive team of instructors whose names were not at all unfamiliar. She couldn't believe that she now sat with some of the greatest minds in the field.
Elizabeth was teamed with Jeffrey Reynolds; the two compared research notes and divided up the classes assigned to them. After their initial meeting, Reynolds invited Elizabeth to join he and his wife for dinner one night that week.
Though Elizabeth didn't work directly with Darcy she did have the office just across the hall and saw him on a daily basis. Their conversations, though friendly and frequent, were limited due to during faculty preparations, but Elizabeth was hopeful that they would become fast friends.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Elizabeth learned that Jeff and Sarah Reynolds lived in a small house only two blocks from her apartment and had made friends with the couple's four year-old daughter, Anne.
Anne had immediately told her that when she grew up she was going to marry, "Weeham" and showed Elizabeth her prize possession, a plastic ring from a box of Cracker Jack.
"She has been telling everyone that now for almost a year!" Sarah Reynolds placed a cup of tea in front of Elizabeth. "William was over one afternoon and Anne decided to give him a box of her favorite treat. I don't remember what Annie's prize was, but William's was that little plastic pink ring. And they have been 'engaged' ever since."
Both women could help but smile at the little girl's beaming face.
"Well, I think it is a beautiful ring, Anne!" Elizabeth fussed over the little girl's hand with the treasure adorning it.
"Maybe he'll get a-nutter one for you and you can be 'gaged to Weeham too!" Anne smiled.
"Well, that's something! She's never offered to share Darcy before!" Jeff sat the little girl into her booster chair as she joined the adults for that night's dinner.
"Well, I feel honored in that case. Thank you, Annie." Elizabeth smiled at the little girl.
After dinner, Elizabeth thanked the Reynolds for their hospitality, hugged little Annie goodbye and walked the two blocks home.
As she walked, she pondered the idea that she had only been there a week and every day only added to her happiness. Maybe all her dreams could come true.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
All good things must come to an end and it happened to Elizabeth as she sat in the cafeteria the Friday before formal classes were to begin.
Students had already arrived and were going through their orientations. Staff meetings had been tense and harried tying up loose ends before students and faculty would start on their journey of knowledge.
Elizabeth was ready for what Monday would bring and entered the cafeteria at noon, skirted the crowd with her tray and made her way to the faculty dining area. She was quietly eating her lunch and reading a letter from her sister when a woman sat unceremoniously in the chair across from her.
"So you are the famous Professor Elizabeth Bennet?" The woman's snide voice surprised Elizabeth as the woman's once over glance only served to confuse her more.
"I'm sorry? May I help you?" Elizabeth said nicely not wanting to be rude like the woman with the orange silk blouse across from her.
"William has told me all about you and how he got you the job here. Oh, you know? Something about doing a favor for his dead friend." The woman made it seem as if it were just a trivial matter and now that William's "debt" to this dead man was done, he could put Elizabeth in some non-threatening position and forget about her.
Elizabeth wanted to cry, but she kept the emotion from her features. Who was this woman and why would she say such things? Elizabeth's answer came quickly.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Where are my manners? I didn't introduce myself. Here is my card." she handed Elizabeth a business card that looked like any other Netherfield faculty card except it was printed on light-orange colored card stock.
She patted Elizabeth's hand and as Elizabeth looked down to see long fingers with very long, manicured nails painted with a light orange colored polish, the rather large diamond ring on the woman's left ring finger flashed light into Elizabeth's eyes.
"Oh! I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to blind you with my engagement ring. I told William not to give me such a big thing, but he insisted. He said that I was worth it and more. Isn't that so sweet?
"Well, I must be off. Classes start Monday and I'm so behind! William has kept me up late every night this week! We must do this again sometime. Tootles!" The woman sashayed out of the faculty dining area and then out of the cafeteria all together.
Elizabeth looked at the card and read the words printed in raised type:
Caroline Wickham
English Department
Netherfield College
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Elizabeth hadn't realized exactly how much that old dream had meant to her until it was totally shattered. No, he wasn't married, but he was engaged to a sour and prissy orange witch.
As she thought about it, she had to realize that she had told herself before leaving Meryton Research that he would most likely have someone by now. And though it hurt to know that he did, what hurt worse was that he arranged for her to get the job because he felt he owned some kind of debt to Ellison Phillips. He didn't even think of her as the "sister" that she thought he would.
She managed to avoid seeing him the rest of that day and over that weekend decided that she would prove to him that she would live up to every word of praise that Professor Phillips had ever given her.
Elizabeth was the most popular instructor in the ______ Department. All of her students excelled and she decided to spend the rest of her life pouring her dedication into students and her work. Dreams had no place with her anymore.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
The autumn leaves turned their colors and the air grew cold. November was drawing to a close and the Thanksgiving holiday was just around the corner. Elizabeth's parents decided to forgo the holiday this year in favor of a second honeymoon and Jane and her family were to spend the holiday with her husband's parents. So Elizabeth planned to stay in the area and catch up on marking papers and enjoying the luxury of relaxing for a day or two.
Jeff and Sarah Reynolds learned that Elizabeth was to be alone on the holiday and invited her to dine with them. She agreed and Thanksgiving morning she awoke to the sound of her telephone ringing. She answered in a rough tired voice.
"Hello?"
"Elizabeth? It's Sarah. Are you okay? You sound funny."
"Um, well ..."
"You aren't sick, are you? I mean, we want you with us today and I'm sure that both Annie and William will be disappointed if you can't come."
William Darcy was to be there? She hadn't known that! Why on earth wasn't he spending it with his fiancée? She couldn't go now, not with him there!
"I'm sorry, Sarah. I don't think I will be able to make it. Please, give my apologies to everyone."
"Oh, Lizzy! Well, I'll bring you some soup later, all right? Now you get some rest!"
"Thank you, Sarah, but you really don't need to trod all the way over here just to bring me soup. I'll be fine. Besides, I might be contagious. I'll just watch the parade on TV and I promise to get some rest. Have a nice time. I'll talk to you tomorrow."
After the two offered closing salutations and hung up, Elizabeth felt a bit guilty for fabricating such a story, but she wasn't totally lying, she did at least have a headache.
Lying down was the last thing Elizabeth wanted to do. The less she did, the more she thought and her thoughts inevitably ended up with William Darcy. It was nearing 10:00 a.m. and the sun was shining just enough to take some of the nip out of the air, so Elizabeth ventured out for a walk. But like her thoughts, her feet lead her to Darcy or at least to the park across from his home.
The house had always been a comfort to her, first with the Phillips's and then watching Darcy from her favorite spot in the park. Today, the house only offered her more heartache as she heard the front door open and saw Caroline Wickham saunter out, hop in her car and drive away. "Another late night, so they slept in! Well, I hope they enjoy their dinner with Jeff and Sarah!" Elizabeth's mind snapped in a sarcastic tone. Elizabeth fled the park as fast as she could and returned home in tears.
After a long hot bath, she made herself some tomato soup and a toasted cheese sandwich and sat in front of the television watching a barrage of Christmas movies. But it didn't help much. Even dressed in her soft, old sweat suit and fluffy socks didn't do anything to improve her mood. So when the doorbell sounded, Elizabeth immediately thought that Sarah decided to stop by anyway. It gave her a feeling that at least there was someone who thought enough of her.
She was shocked to find that it was William Darcy standing at the door holding a container with soup, turkey, stuffing and mashed potatoes.
"Elizabeth! I bring a feast to cure all. Are you feeling any better?" He said as he invited himself in and moved toward the kitchen with the food.
"I'm better, yes, thank you. What are you doing here?" Elizabeth still stood at the door letting the cold air fill the room.
Darcy returned to the door and closed it. "Bringing you dinner. Sarah said that you were under the weather. So I offered to bring you a plate of food."
"Why?" Elizabeth stood with her arms crossed over her chest and waited for an answer with a look of indignation.
Darcy stared back at her as if he were examining his latest lab results. "You aren't sick at all. What is going on, Elizabeth? Why would you tell Sarah that?"
She answered quickly and with a raised voice, "Because it was the only way I could get out of going to dinner without hurting her feelings!"
"Why would you do that? I thought you and Sarah were friends?" his voice sounded cold.
"I didn't know that you were going to be there! She just sprung it on me and, because she is my friend, I fibbed so I wouldn't hurt her feelings!"
"Do my table manners offend you in some way, Professor Bennet?" He snapped.
"It doesn't matter! Would you just please leave?" Elizabeth was no longer controlling her anger.
"It does matter! It matters to me!" Darcy's anger was flaring just as high, though he wasn't sure of the reason other than he was at a total loss to explain the situation. Something he was far from used to.
"Oh! Prey tell my why, Professor Darcy, do you care?"
Darcy's face softened and he took a step closer to her. Quietly stammering, he professed, "Because ... I ... I, I'm ... in love with you."
"Now that's rich! Tell me, do you use that line on all the women?" She couldn't believe that he would stoop so low as to spend the night and morning with his fiancée and then a few hours later, claim to be in love with another.
"What?! All what women?! What in God's name are you talking about?" He was furious.
"You know, I don't even care! What really bothers me is that the only reason I have this job is because you felt you had to repay some debt to Professor Phillips and condescended to it give me. The only thing I have is my work! It's the only thing important to me and I'm just a blasted charity case!"
Darcy's look was utter confusion. "What are you talking about?" His voice was calm, but his thoughts were not.
"Look! Can you please just leave? ... take your orange coordinated fiancée and go play pilgrim somewhere, but leave me alone." She opened the door and gestured for him to leave.
He walked through the door and just before she slammed it in his face, he said, "Excuse me for trespassing on your time. Enjoy your dinner."
Elizabeth slowly returned to her spot in front of the television and buried her face in a pillow as she cried harder than she had at the Phillips's funeral.
"Oh, why did I ever let myself get so carried away with my dreams?" were the only words that she spoke for the rest of the day.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
As William walked back towards the Reynolds' home and his car, he replayed the entire argument back in his mind. "Does she really think that she got the job because she thinks I 'owed' something to Ellis?" As he sat down in his car, the last thing she said suddenly made sense. "Take your orange coordinated fiancée and go play pilgrim somewhere, but leave me alone. Why hadn't he picked up on that when she said it? "Orange! Caroline Wickham! That woman has been the bane of my existence since she arrived here! No wonder Pemberley was so happy to see her go. Well, if she can convince the regents that I 'invited' her to Netherfield because I 'have feelings for her' then she could somehow poison Elizabeth. I'm probably as obvious as a cat in heat to likes of Caroline. Why couldn't I just have been a normal person?" William leaned his head against the steering wheel for a few moments before starting the car and driving home.
Darcy noticed his sister and brother-in-law's car sitting out front of the house and decided that he wasn't ready to face them as of yet, so he decided to take a turn in the park. He hadn't quite made it to the park when he realized that Caroline Wickham had been at his house that morning. Knowing Elizabeth's proclivity to venture into the park and stare at the house (for it definitely wasn't to stare at him), she might have been in the park this morning and, if she had been and saw Caroline, well, it would only cement her belief in whatever delusions Caroline had propagated. Now he knew he had to explain to Elizabeth. He couldn't let her believe a crazy woman's lies.
Darcy only ever had one aspiration in life and that was to be normal. There was no way he could be. He had no power to turn off his brain. The only way he could ever somewhat obtain his goal was to be apart of something normal. A family. But his parents were gone as were the Phillips'. His sister was grown and married to Richard Fitzwilliam, a doctor and retired Army colonel. They were expecting their first child in July. And though they visited often, it wasn't the same as having a family of his own. He had always imagined having that family with Elizabeth. Ellis had told him about her many times and that final Christmas when he saw the photograph of her in on Ellis's desk, he was captured. He could never think of a relationship with her while she was a student for he was a faculty member at both schools she attended; there was nothing to be done.
After she left school, he had all but given up on his dream until the day the head of physics stopped by his office and asked why a ______ist would want a job teaching physics? He called S. G. Lucas and learned all the reasons why. He called in all of his favors and pulled all the strings he could to put her in the job she belonged. He would never regret that. The Physics Department was better for it, ______ Department was better for it and HE was better for it.
After a quick visit with Georgiana and Richard, William excused himself to do what he knew he must. Explain. And he did. In a three page letter, written front and back, he explained everything from the moment he knew he had fallen for her to Caroline Wickham's delusions and her attempt to insinuate herself on the Darcy's holiday that very morning only to have Georgiana throw her out. He told her how he had turned down spending the holiday with his sister and Richard to spend it with her. He told her that all he ever wanted to be was normal and that if she truly only wanted her work she could have his and he would do something "ordinary" like be a piano teacher. If she did not want to believe him, he understood. If she chose the way of a good researcher, she could always ask Edward Gardiner to verify any of his words. Edward came every Christmas to Netherfield, if only to give William one normal day a year.
William was tired when he finished the letter. It was three in the morning, but he wouldn't wait to deliver it. By 3:15 a.m. the letter slid through the mail slot in Elizabeth's apartment door.
The Professor Returns, Part Six
Elizabeth tossed and turned, not able to really sleep. Why had she barked at him so? Why couldn't she have just taken the food, thanked him and let him go on his way? But no, she had to punish him for falling for a tangerine teacher from the English Department. Punish him for giving her a job.
As the night progressed, so did the questions in her mind.
Hadn't she decided to take almost anything that would get her away from Collins? Then why were his reasons for employing her in the ______ Department so questionable? Professor Phillips must have made sure that if she ever needed anything, she would be taken care of. Darcy did as his fatherly friend asked, then why was it so awful?
She knew the reason. She was in love with him. It all came back to her dream; the one she told herself to let go, but never could.
As Thursday night turned into Friday morning, Elizabeth finally started to drift off to sleep. Her head sank deeper into her pillow and, as her consciousness started to slip into the abyss of slumber, her mind suddenly sounded a citrus colored voice, "William has kept me up late every night this week! And the picture of Caroline Wickham leaving Darcy's house like she must every morning stung her and tears began to fall anew. "How dare he even try to say that he is in love with me! What kind of game is he playing?"
Abandoning any effort to sleep, Elizabeth rose and made her way to the kitchen where, with the aid of a glowing night-light, she fixed herself a cup of tea. She was just about to return to the living room when she heard a noise at her front door and froze only to wonder if she had the power to scream. She finally realized it wasn't an intruder, but someone who dropped something through the mail slot. "Dropping rent notices a bit early, aren't they?" she asked herself quietly finding a comfortable spot on her couch.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
William returned home in the morning's darkness and sat on the porch swing. He stared off into the park as life slowly awakened around him, all the while feeling his life slowly die.
He was still sitting there when Georgiana and Richard drove up and appeared in their best "grubbies".
"Will! You're up! Are you ready to go?" Georgiana happily exclaimed thinking her brother eager to indulge in their day after Thanksgiving holiday tradition of finding a Christmas tree.
Darcy remained staring at the park, but answered with a question. "Go where?" As he turned his head, the young couple noticed the tired, red-rimmed eyes that looked at them with utter despair.
"Will?" Georgiana asked quietly lowering herself next to her brother.
"Are you feeling okay, Will?" Richard added. "I mean we can wait to pick out Christmas trees if your not feeling well. We can do just as easily tomorrow."
Darcy looked between the two and felt even lonelier. They had what he wanted. They shared a love that made them one, a love that was giving them a child, a family. They were normal.
Suddenly the thought of shopping for Christmas trees was disgusting to him. He didn't want to be around other families. He didn't want a tree, there was no need for one.
"Why don't the two of you go and pick-up your tree," William's voice was emotionless. "I'm not really in the mood this year." He turned away from them to stare at the park again.
Believing he must be depressed from thinking of his parents, Ellis and Rachel, Georgiana prodded, "Come on, Will. It will make you feel better."
William could no longer hold the firestorm of emotions that raged within him and he flew up from the swing and screamed, "Would you two just leave me alone! I don't want a stupid Christmas tree! I don't want to celebrate Thanksgiving or Christmas! I just want to be left alone!" With that, he turned from his shocked sister and brother-in-law and entered the house slamming the door behind him.
"Do you think something happened at over at Jeff and Sarah's yesterday?" Richard asked his wife.
"I don't know. He seemed okay last night, but I surely don't want to ask him about it now. Why don't we just go get our tree and give him a few days to come to terms with his demons?" came her reply as the couple drove off.
William's outburst only made him feel worse. His sister didn't deserve to be yelled. It wasn't her fault. He quickly picked up the telephone and dialed the Fitzwilliam's phone number. After leaving an apology on their answering machine, he returned to the porch swing and his vigil of the park.
He remained at his post for the rest of the day and for a short while after night fell. It was still early, she might take an evening stroll through the park. Her park. When the hour grew late, he retreated inside.
William roamed through the house, going from room to room. His mind wouldn't stop. Did she find the letter? Did she read it or did she throw it away? Did she believe him? Did she laugh at him? Did she even care?
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Elizabeth tried everything to take her mind off of Darcy. First, she tried marking papers, but seeing anything to do with ______ only made her think of William. She tried cleaning the apartment, but how many times could one scrub the bathtub or rearrange the contents of kitchen cabinets.
She wanted to go outside, she wanted to go to the park, but it was too near him.
Elizabeth stood and stared at the door trying to think of where she could go when she looked to floor and saw a white envelope. Her name was boldly written on it. She recognized the writing. It was his.
She almost jumped out of her skin when the telephone rang.
"Hello?" she said in a shaky voice.
"Elizabeth. It's Sarah. How are you feeling today? Any better?"
"Oh! Sarah ... um, yes ... a bit. I'm rather tired, but ... but, a bit better." She wasn't better and she knew it, but she didn't want to arouse Sarah's suspicions or cause her any concern. "Thank you for the dinner by the way."
"I was very worried about you, you know? So was William. I was glad he offered to check in on you."
"Well, he did and I'll be fine. Not to worry."
"If you need anything, you call me, okay?"
"Okay. Thank you, Sarah. You are a wonderful friend."
"Well, so are you, sweetie. Now you rest. And remember if you need anything ..."
"I know. And thank you. I'll talk to you soon. Bye."
Elizabeth hung up the phone and picked up the envelope. She was afraid to read it, but she couldn't put it down. She tried. She laid it on the counter, but soon picked it up again. She tried putting on the table, but her fingers couldn't move away. Finally, she took it over to the couch and after seating herself, she opened it and read,
My Dearest Elizabeth ...
Tears poured from her eyes as she discovered that he had loved her since she was his student. How he gleaned information about her from Edward Gardiner after she left Netherfield. She felt the frustrations he suffered as he had to deal with Caroline Wickham. She learned that Caroline's infatuation of him started after he had met her at one of Georgiana's family day functions at Pemberley College. How she made her way to Netherfield and "created" a life with him. It existed in only her mind and was never requited, but that didn't stop Caroline.
Oh, that, Elizabeth could understand, it was the same for her with Bill Collins.
Though he had no idea what lies Caroline had used to pollute her opinion of him, he knew that they had to seem possible even if completely improbable. He apologized for not realizing that Caroline was up to something especially when she dared to come to the house on Thanksgiving morning. He thanked providence that his sister and brother-in-law had come by for an early visit for his sister threw Caroline out as he readied himself to spend the day at the Reynolds's ... with her.
As she read on and saw his words about wanting to be "normal", her heart broke. Shattered. She couldn't help talking to the letter as if it could carry her voice to his ears, "You know how to cry, how to feel. And you think you're not normal? Oh, yes, William. You are quite normal. Oh, you are special too, very special. But that doesn't make you abnormal. Can't you see that?" She brushed the tears from her eyes and then discovered how she became an Associate Professor of ______ at Netherfield.
He told her that when the head of physics queried him about her application, he wasn't going to let her waste her time teaching the fundamentals of physics to college freshmen. Her abilities were far beyond that. After arranging incentives for certain faculty members to move to positions that better suited them, he was able to open up a position in his own department for her and convinced the regents that this was the better plan. And after almost three months time, he had proven his assumption correct.
He told her that if she chose not to believe his words, she was welcome to ask Edward Gardiner. He conversed often with him even while Edward and Maddy traveled. They were to spend the Christmas holiday at Netherfield again this year as they had every year since the Phillips's had passed.
When, at the end of the letter, he offered to give her all of his research, she truly understood that William Darcy wasn't a paragon of scientific study. He wasn't a genius with a heart. He wasn't a "normal" man. He was a simple human being, wanting to live a simple life. He wanted what everyone wanted, to be happy, to love someone and to be loved in return. He wanted exactly what she wanted.
She read and re-read the letter several times before asking the walls around her, "What have I done? What can he think of me now? He must think me an idiot. How can I ever face him?"
With these new questions for her mind to wrestle, she watched the sun set and rise without knowing sleep.
The long weekend turned into days and nights of deep thought for both Elizabeth and William. Both soon both came to the conclusion that they had managed to destroy whatever good qualities they had in the mind of the other.
William kept his watch on the park, waiting for her so that he could see her face. He wanted to know what she was feeling. But as the days past and the weekend drew to a close, he knew that she didn't want anything to do with him. His heart sunk further into his chest. He promised himself to try one more time Monday. They had the same office hours Monday afternoons. If he could just get one glimpse of her, he would know.
Elizabeth spent the whole of the weekend in her tiny apartment. She must have read his letter at least a thousand times. Each time she did, she felt closer to him and each time, she felt that there was no way he could still love her. Just remembering how she acted when he only wanted to make sure she was feeling better from an illness that she never had made her more depressed. Her only illness had been misguided pride and total stupidity. There was no cure for that. She finally decided that she would do her best to spare him the humiliation of having to see her. They had the same office hours the next day. She would cancel her office hours and have students see her in the lab if they needed to.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Elizabeth managed to see any students that needed her during the lab. She decided that she would go to the park during her normal office hours. She could feel free to be there and Darcy could feel free to keep his office door open and not worry about having to see her. So at 2:45 p.m. she headed to her car only to realize that she had left her car keys in her office. She would have to hurry, but she could easily make it to her office, retrieve her keys and be almost to the park by three.
As Elizabeth neared the top of the stairs, she heard one of her students calling to her.
"Professor Bennet! I'm sorry. I know that you said that you weren't going to have any office hours today, but I need to see you for just a minute. Please?"
"Well, Miss King, I'm in a bit of a hurry, but if you don't mind walking with me to my office and then directly to my car, I can make an exception." Elizabeth couldn't see not helping one of the few women that dared attempt to study ______.
Miss King's question required a little more than just a "yes" or "no". Elizabeth knew in what reference book to find the answer and quickly looked it up. She took longer in her office that she wanted, but with a quick glance at her watch felt that she had plenty of time to make her escape. As Miss King wished her a good afternoon and left, Elizabeth returned her book to the shelf. She remembered her jacket on the back of the door and pulled the door closed so that she could remove it.
"Good afternoon, Professor Darcy!" Miss King's voice could be heard greeting the Department head and Elizabeth snapped up to attention.
Quietly peering through the crack in her door, Elizabeth saw Darcy greet the student and head toward his office and hers. She managed to latch her door securely without a sound and moved to her chair to "sit out" the office hours. She decided that she liked being so near to him without the fear of being discovered. He would think that she was out of the office and, yet, she would be near.
Monday morning had dragged on for William. He thought it would never reach 3:00 p.m. so that he could run to his office and wait for Elizabeth to come to hers. He ran all the way from the lecture hall to the faculty offices. He took the stairs two at time and greeted a student at the top and headed for his office. He noticed that Elizabeth's door was closed. After he reached his own door and opened it, he turned toward hers and noted the notice posted on the board next to her door.
No Office Hours Monday!
Please see me during lab if needed.
He rested his head on the edge of his office door. He was now sure that she didn't care about him. That she didn't want anything to do with him. He managed to move his defeated spirit and body enough to set him down in his chair. What should he do now?
"Excuse me?"
William looked up to see two men standing at his door.
"Are you Professor Darcy?"
Darcy's answer was almost mechanical. "I am. Is there something I can do for you?"
"Well, I think it would be the other way around. I am L. C. de Bourgh and this is my associate, William Collins."
Darcy stared at the infamous Professor de Bourgh and then at his toady associate and thought, "Collins? Where have I heard that name before?"
"And why is it you're here Mr. de Bourgh? Mr. Collins?" William wasn't in the mood to deal with the ______ community's black sheep researcher and his amphibian lemming, let alone acknowledge them as purveyors of knowledge.
"You can't fail to understand why we are here? You must know?"
"I'm sorry, I haven't the faintest idea what brings you here. I'm afraid you will have to enlighten me." Darcy stood and crossed his arms over his chest. He was ready to battle these two simpletons with any research claim they could cook up.
"My associate has heard a nasty rumor and we have come to learn of its veracity and quickly settle it to rights if it's true."
"de Bourgh, you will have to speak plainly. Exactly what are you speaking of?" Darcy was becoming less patient with these two. He would rather wallow in self-pity and these two were interrupting him.
"Elizabeth Bennet, of course." Collins chirp up smugly.
Instantly William remembered where he had heard the name "Collins." S. G. Lucas told him about Collins and his "pursuit" of Elizabeth. It had been the reason she left Meryton Research. Collins even dared to marry Lucas's daughter to avoid being fired. William wondered if Collins favored the color orange.
"What about Elizabeth?" William asked. This was the last topic he wanted to speak to anyone about and especially this duo.
"Well," Collins continued. "I heard from one of my colleagues that she has integrated herself here."
"And why would you care? What is she to you?" Darcy was very interested in Collins's answer and he assumed the shadow that now stood behind the frosted glass of Professor Bennet's door would be as well.
"You must understand, sir, that Elizabeth Bennet and I ... well, we ... um, we were ..." Collins stammered. The thought of standing before Professor William Darcy was beginning to play to his excitement. He now wished he had thought to bring his lab coat with him. Perhaps Darcy would have autographed it for him.
"Oh, go on man! I don't have all day!" Darcy's patience was straining to the limit. He could tell that the shadow lurking in the office across the hall was ready to hurl something through the glass.
"Well, you see ... we worked closely together and she isn't the type of researcher that ... well, to put it simply ... she tried to steel my research. And I fear that if she is here, she will try the same thing."
"I see. Well, may I ask, how she tried to steal this research? " Darcy had an idea of what this reptile would accuse Elizabeth of and he didn't like it. In the back of his mind he thought that this must have been the way Elizabeth felt with the lies Caroline forged.
"First, you must tell us if she is here," de Bourgh interjected.
"Must I?" Darcy glared back at the misfits. "I wasn't aware I was under obligation to supply you with any information. I believe it was you who said that you were here to be of assistance to me. Or so I gathered."
"Well, of course, we wish to help you. Perhaps even if she isn't here, it would be advisable to warn you in case she decided to work her wiles on you." de Bourgh felt that maybe they should ingratiate themselves with Darcy. "It could be advantageous later," he thought.
"Work her wiles? What are you implying?" William really needn't of asked. He knew these two must feel confident enough with their scheme to try to insinuate themselves with him and into respectability.
Collins gave a little smirk to his companion and explained, "Well, she is quite the vixen. She offered me certain favors if you catch my meaning."
Darcy glanced across the hall and noticed the shadow's agitated movements.
"Really? Is that why you opted to elope with Charlotte Lucas? I was under the assumption that you were the one 'offering favors' and entered into a marriage to retain your job." Darcy stood close the man and look down on him with disgust.
"She IS here, isn't she? She told you these ... these lies!" de Bourgh screamed.
"I wouldn't tell you if she were or not, de Bourgh. You are not someone I would call trust worthy! As for your assistant here, I received my information on him from S. G. Lucas himself!
"Furthermore, Elizabeth Bennet is one of the best researchers in the field today! She was one of my best students, not mention that of Professors Phillips and Gardiner. Both of who spoke very highly of her. I would have hired her when she graduated from Longbourn had she made an application. I would have hired then and I would hire her today. Now, if you two don't mind, I would prefer that you desist in insulting my intelligence and leave my office. Also, Mister de Bourgh, if you or any of your mealy-mouthed little toads like this one ever try and insult or discredit Professor Elizabeth Bennet, I will have you up brought on ethics violations before the ______ Society governors! Now, GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!"
As Collins and de Bourgh stood in the doorway shocked, Darcy quickly approached them and they quickly stepped back into the hall and into a crowd of Netherfield faculty who had congregated in the hallway upon hearing shouting coming from the never excitable Professor Darcy.
Darcy slammed his door causing the glass t rattle. He wanted to check on Elizabeth, but knew that with everyone in the hall, now was not the time.
After a few minutes, the noise and the crowd in the hall dissipated and Elizabeth opened her door slowly. She made a quick surveillance of the hall, noting Darcy's door still closed, she quietly exited her office and made a silent dash for her car. Her emotions were in utter chaos. Did she just hear him stand up for her after everything she said to him, accused him of? Did he really say that she was one of the best researchers in the field. Did he say that he wanted to hire her when she had left Longbourn? Did he really say that he would hire her today? Could he still love her? The questions screamed in her brain as the tears fell from her eyes and she ran to the parking lot. She needed to go to the park. She needed to think.
William stood at his office window and stared down at the movement below. How dare those obsequious academic asses insult Elizabeth. He wished he had thought to ram his fist down their gullets. He wished he ... All of Darcy's thoughts stopped the second he saw Elizabeth Bennet hurry from the building entrance to the parking lot. He saw her swipe her hand across her eyes. "She's going to the park!" he said to the window. And he quickly turned from the window and removed himself from his office to his own car. He knew what he must do.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Elizabeth was grateful for the cold air. It kept others from the park. She could sit in peace and not worry about anyone seeing her tears. Why were people so cruel? Why was he so wonderful? Why couldn't he love her again? Elizabeth felt that she had it all and never knew it, only to lose it all when she discovered it was gone.
The cold breeze and the emotional pain made her shiver. She pulled her knees up and hugged them tightly. In an attempt to dry her eyes, Elizabeth moved her head down to wipe her eyes against her knees, then closed them and laid her left cheek atop her knees. She felt tired. Her argument with William, the long sleepless weekend, her hurried class and lab and, finally, the emotional mess of de Bourgh and Collins had taken her strength. With tears still seeping from her closed eyes, Elizabeth dozed off into a depression-induced slumber.
William made it home and, after a quick stop in the house for a jacket, he raced to the park. The sky was darkening and the air growing colder, but he knew where to find her.
He was still some distance away from Elizabeth's usual spot, but he saw her bundled up against her knees and approached quietly. When he reached her, he saw her closed eyes and wet lashes and cheeks.
"Elizabeth?" he called in a soft, quiet voice, but she didn't respond just stirred slightly.
"Are you asleep, sweetheart?" he asked and knelt next to her and lightly wiped the wetness from her cheeks.
He worried for a split second until he realized that if she went through even half of what he had since their argument, an atomic explosion wouldn't wake her. His body was almost ready to give out and demand that he surrender to exhaustion, but he would wait until he at least got her home and out of the cold.
"Elizabeth, it's too cold to stay out here. Come on, let's go home," he pulled her up from her knees to rest her head against his shoulder. "Put your arms around my neck."
Elizabeth sensed the warmth and snuggled as closely to it's source as she could. Upon hearing his request, she unconsciously complied and wrapped her arms about his neck.
William slipped one arm around her and the other under her legs. He pulled her close and slowly lifted her into his arms. After making sure his feet and legs were in the proper position to stand with the extra weight, he rose slowly as not to awaken her.
Walking back to his house with Elizabeth in his arms was something William was cherishing. If she awoke and demanded that he put her down, he would have to comply, but while he had the chance he was going to savor it.
"Sleepy," Elizabeth murmured.
"I know, Sweetheart," he answered with a kiss to her forehead.
"Why?" he heard her say and replied, "Why what, Elizabeth? What are you dreaming of?"
Elizabeth had no idea that she was really talking to him, she thought she was dreaming and that her mind was answering her in his voice. So she had no qualms about continuing her sleepy conversation. Maybe she would find answers in her sleep.
"Why don't you love me?" she asked as she burrowed her face into his neck.
William was stunned by the question and almost tripped on the steps leading to his porch. Hadn't he told her during their argument that he loved her? Didn't he tell again in the letter? After over hearing the yelling match with ______ worst twits, hoe could she think that he didn't love her?
He couldn't quite remember how he opened the door with Elizabeth in his arms, but once he did and was inside, he closed it with his foot. He walked to the living room and sat down in a large, pillowy armchair with Elizabeth still in his arms. He held her close and moved his lips closer to her ear.
"Elizabeth Bennet, there is no one that I love more than you. Don't you ever doubt that. No matter what you think of me, know that I love you and always will." He too was tired and his heart ached.
He kicked off his shoes and managed to remove Elizabeth's shoes as well. Pulling a light quilt that Rachel Phillips had made up over them, he pulled Elizabeth to his chest and leaned back into the armchair that transformed into a recliner. Within a minute of closing his tear-filled eyes, William Darcy was asleep.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
Elizabeth felt warm, safe and very contented. She wasn't quite awake, but she wasn't asleep either. Her eyes were closed but she somehow knew it was night and she snuggled deeper into the soft cushions and the wonderful warmth around her. As she felt something warm and soft press against her forehead, she suddenly became more conscious, her eyes flew open and she moved to sit up. As she quickly bent at the waist, William's body followed hers and the recliner moved to right itself just as quickly. The chair's occupants were on their way to floor when William quickly tightened his arms about Elizabeth and planted his feet flat on the floor.
Elizabeth let out a light screech from the sudden movement while William exclaimed, "What?!" Both were breathing hard and tightly holding onto the other while their tired brains deciphered the situation.
There was enough light in the room for Elizabeth to finally see that she was in the house she hadn't seen the inside of for eight years. It was at that moment that she realized she was holding tightly onto someone who could only be William Darcy. What made her heart jump was the fact that he was holding just as tightly onto her.
"How did I get here?" she whispered.
"You fell asleep in the park," his voice was groggy.
"Why didn't you just awaken me?"
"You were too exhausted, so I brought you home." His mouth was right next to her ear and his voice was husky. The way he said the word "home" sent a warm rush of heat through her core and caused her to hold him tighter.
While embracing her extra firmly, he slowly reclined back into the chair. His fingers rested under her hair and upon her neck. He lightly messaged the skin with his fingertips while his other hand pulled the quilt back up over them.
"Close your eyes and rest some more, Sweetheart," he whispered just before he pressed his lips to her forehead for a light kiss. She realized that had been a kiss that had awakened her. "I love you, Elizabeth," he said as he fell back to sleep.
If it was a dream, she didn't want to wake up and, if it was reality, she didn't want to fall asleep afraid that it would all disappear again upon awakening. So she did the only thing she could think of and held on to him tightly and closed her eyes. Soon she joined him in slumber.
Somewhere in the night, the two had settled in the chair so that they lying on their sides facing each other. Both held the other tightly so that their bodies pressed up against the others from their feet to their lips. William's left hand settled on the small of her back where her blouse had slid up to expose her skin and Elizabeth's right hand had found its way under William's sweater and shirt to settle in the hair on his chest just over his heart. His legs were entwined around hers and her upper lip pressed lightly against the lower of his.
The clock on the mantle over the fireplace chimed three times disturbing both Elizabeth and William slightly from their sleep. Each felt feather-like wisps of breath caress their face and, as Elizabeth started to move her lips to ask the time, the sensation it aroused provoked William to move his and turn the movements into a light kiss. Slowly the kiss deepened causing hands to roam and lips to part. William shyly grazed Elizabeth's teeth with his tongue eliciting a small moan.
William's hands moved the front of Elizabeth's blouse slowly undoing each button until he could slip his hands inside to caress her smooth skin. His hands slid around to her back and he pressed them together chest to breast and rolled her atop him.
Still in a slight stupor of sleep, Elizabeth timidly sat up on William's.
The glow of street lights through the windows was enough to illuminate Elizabeth's swelling curves and William watched with wrapped attention as her eyes glowed with longing as she stared at his face. In a silent call inviting him experience something he only ever dreamed of, William lifted he head to. It seemed to take hours for his mouth to capture hers and he savored the taste of her lips.
She pressed him wanting to touch every part of him. She wanted to feel him and him to feel her. She held him tightly as she felt the recliner righting it and him shuffling to the edge of the seat.
He grabbed underneath her knees and slid his hands up the back of her legs to her bottom. Cupping her fleshy cheeks, he rose to stand and the quilt slipped to the floor. Pressing her bottom to him and traveling his hands back to her knees, he prodded her legs to encircle him. Once her legs locked around his waist, he moved his hands to hold her securely and started his trek to the front hall and the staircase.
As they reached the stairs, William pulled his head away and looked up at her face. His eyes spoke the words he felt but didn't know how to verbalize and he waited until he received her answer.
Her smile lit up the room and with her eyes speaking volumes to his heart, she softly uttered, "I love you, William Darcy." She lowered her face and met his lips. What happened around her while her lips were devouring his, she didn't know, but when she finally pulled away from savoring his mouth, they were at the top of the stairs and moving down the hallway.
Once in the master bedroom, William placed Elizabeth on her feet to stand before him. He watched her as she took several steps away from. William was just about to close the distance when he read in her eyes that she wanted to admire the view a bit before he did so. He let her gaze over him as he thought of how easy it was to hear her speak through her eyes. All the times they had ever stared at one another he realized that they had only whispered softly not really hearing the other, but now. This was no whisper.
Standing as close as possible without touching, they made their promises to each other speaking only from their eyes and their hearts. Smiling with the completion of their vows, they sealed their silent troth with a passionate kiss.
He lowered her to the foot of the bed and knelt before her and spoke the only word he would utter for the rest of the night, "Forever." Taking her face in his hands, he placed his lips on hers and kissed as he pushed her back to lie on the bed.
Both wanted to share in being one. Now was the time of marriage of their hearts. Their eyes met and she answered with her last word of the night, "Forever."
After making love, they ended the ritual with loving kisses until they returned to their slumber locked in a tight embrace.
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
As Elizabeth hung the Christmas ornaments on the tree, she remembered the last time she remarked to herself that seven years had past, but this time she was sure of many things. She was sure of her work, sure of her dreams and sure of herself.
She placed the ornaments down on the table near the tree and walked over to a drawer, opened it and pulled out a small flat box. She eased herself down into the soft, pillowy armchair and placed the box on her swollen belly. She smiled as she removed the letter that rested in the box.
As she read Rachel Phillips last words to her, Elizabeth could help but let the tears fall. It had been 15 years since they died and she wondered if they could see her now. If they could see her sitting in the chair where she first kissed her husband seven years ago. If they could see her six year-old son, William Ellison out in the front yard tossing a ball to his father or her three year-old daughter, Rachel Jane hanging onto her father's neck as he carried her about the yard on his back. Did they know if this new one would be a Richard or a Sarah?
Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and William Darcy telling his children to go wash their hands and faces, so they could help mommy with the Christmas tree. She looked up to see her husband's worried visage as he stared at her wet cheeks.
"Lizzy! What's the matter?" he said as he quickly crossed the room to her.
She showed him the letter and he smiled pulling her up from the chair only to take her place. The next moment she found herself on his lap and wrapped in his arms.
"I'm sure they see us, Sweetheart. Just as I'm sure they were standing with us on our wedding day." His lips met her forehead and then her hair before settling just below her ear.
"I wonder if they would be surprised to see us today?"
"You mean married with 2.75 children?" William replied wryly.
Elizabeth nodded happily. Just as she started rubbing her belly, she turned to her husband and asked, "How do you think this little one will look?"
"I'm sure not much different from William or Rachel ... curly dark hair and dark eyes, just like their mommy."
"Just like their daddy!" she corrected him.
"Just like every other normal family," William said with a big smile as his children join their mother on his lap.
~ FINIS ~