An Unexpected Flight

By Elke

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An Unexpected Flight - Chapter 1

Posted on Thursday, 24 July 2003, at

Hunsford, April 11th 1812

Elisabeth went for a walk.

She knew she would probably miss Col. Fitzwilliam´s farewell visit, as the gentleman was leaving Rosings today with his cousin, but she didn´t care. Too much was on her mind and though she was by no means sure that Mr Darcy would accompany the colonel she couldn´t imagine meeting him now.

After the letter he´d handed her yesterday Elizabeth didn´t know what to think or feel. Although still angry at him she had to acknowledge the magnitude of her prejudices and the carelessness with which she´d applied them.

Upon reaching the open field again an astonishing sight greeted her. Miss De Bourgh´s phaeton and her pony were standing there and the lady herself was seated on a blanket under a tree at the edge of the wood, alone.

Lizzy tried to retreat quietly because nor was she in a mood for polite conversation neither seemed Miss De Bourgh looking for company. But something in her demeanour made Lizzy take a closer look. Lady Catherine´s daughter appeared to be even paler than usual and her eyes were closed. Elizabeth ventured nearer and enquired tentatively

„Miss De Bourgh, are you all right?“

It took the young woman a while to open her eyes and Lizzy was struck by the hopelessness they revealed. As her breath was coming in short gasps her mien seemed to ask for patience.

In the light of her new found discoveries about her own perceptiveness Elizabeth wondered whether she hadn´t judged Miss de Bourgh as wrongly as she had her cousin, Mr Darcy. She realised that once she´d put her down as a faded and timid copy of her arrogant mother she´d never taken any pains to get to know her.

Elizabeth was ashamed of herself and vowed to do better by Miss de Bourgh for the rest of her stay - even if she really was as haughty as she appeared. Instinctively she took one of her hands which were cold and limp and tried her best reassuring smile.

There was some hesitation in Miss de Bourgh´s demeanour but the first real kindness she´d received since she was taken away from her nanny was her undoing - she couldn´t make herself stop talking and could only hope that Miss Bennet was as discreet and kindhearted as she thought her to be.

„Do not worry, Miss Bennet. Sometimes I manage to escape from Rosings and the thought just now that I have to return soon made me feel like I can´t breathe anymore. Believe me, I don´t want to marry my cousin any more than he does but I can´t help but to think of how wonderful my life would be if he´d take me away from here.“

Elizabeth was astonished to say at least because of this sudden outburst. Yet it took her no great leaps of imagination to recognise the burden Lady Catherine would present to her daughter.

„But surely you can get an invitation from Mr Darcy to visit him and his sister?“

„Oh yes, he has been most kind to me in that regard until this year. When I go to Pemberley my mother goes with me but still I am happy there. My only regret is that she makes life very difficult for Fitzwilliam and Georgiana. Having had no mother Georgiana takes everything my mother says far too seriously. The way Mother tries to interfere with Mr Darcy´s way of raising his sister and managing his estate is truly embarrassing. I cannot fault him for putting a stop to our visits. I think it has mostly to do with Georgiana, she is at a trying age where my mother can do a lot of damage. No, he is right to chose his sister over his cousin.“

Elizabeth was stunned by these revelations. She guessed that Miss Darcy´s Ramsgate affair was the real motive for Mr Darcy no longer inviting his cousin (and consequently his aunt). Lizzy could easily picture the effect of somebody like Lady Catherine on a shy sixteen year old just about to recover from a most cruel experience. It also shed a new light on his mentioning family considerations in his proposal - even if it was still very ill mannered.

She tried to put Mr Darcy from her mind and concentrate on the young woman in front of her.

„I am sorry, Miss Bennet, I shouldn´t burden you with my worries. I can see my situation clearly now and when I have to face my mother I can´t even refuse another shawl even if I am already nearly smothered. Either I manage to stand up to her or I find a husband who does this deed for me but that is highly unlikely. Or do you think a terrible thunderstorm could sweep an Eastern European prince to the gates of Rosings who falls for me irrevocably?“

For her own sake Elizabeth was relieved of Miss de Bourgh´s intention to lighten the conversation - and for her sake as well, if she was able to make light of her situation, a lot was won.

„Miss de Bourgh, if you can come up with such means of escape, don´t you think that you have it in you to stand up to your mother? Maybe a little time away from her would help you to gather resolve and courage? Mr Darcy might be able to help you to arrange something.“

„I have thought about it. One problem is that my mother really loves me and I in turn do not want to hurt her. The other is that Fitzwilliam hates disguise of every sort. Even more important is that doing his duty by his family means a lot to him. I believe in fact that that is what kept him going after losing his parents and having to manage Pemberley and to raise Georgiana from an age on when other young men idle away their time in clubs and at horse races. I do hope that the very notion of familial duty doesn´t lead him astray when it comes to choosing a wife for I very much hope that he finds someone capable of lifting at least some of the weight he carries off his shoulders.“

Elizabeth blushed profoundly at this and was glad that Miss de Bourgh was looking far away.

Otherwise she might have questioned her motives for broaching such a topic...

Lizzy hadn´t been insensitive to the great compliment Mr Darcy had paid her by proposing but had not seen to which extent he had thought her to be capable of sharing his life.

She knew for a fact that he was able to go against family considerations but she couldn´t share this with Miss de Bourgh. She tried again

„Even if Mr Darcy would not help you I am very sure that he wouldn´t tell your mother what you are asking from him.“

„I will think about it. Thank you again, Miss Bennet, for your patience.“

„`T was nothing.“

„Would you do me the great honour of staying in touch by writing?“

„Of course, it will be a pleasure.“

Miss de Bourgh was looking to the side again and actually blushing.

„Feel free to withdraw your consent after hearing what I must add. I fear my mother would not allow us to converse - even if sometimes I got the notion that she likes you for your courage. May I give you a letter from Miss Stamford for you to copy the writing of the address? Miss Stamford writes regularly to me in such a proper and boring manner that Mother is not interested in her letters.“

Lizzy thought about the whole idea. She found that she didn´t like the disguise but pondered her other option. Denying Miss de Bourgh her wish seemed most cruel and if their correspondence helped her finding enough courage to stand up to her mother - Elizabeth agreed and saw with some amazement the timid Anne de Bourgh drive off in her phaeton with almost reckless speed.

Chapter 2

Posted on Sunday, 27 July 2003

Elizabeth had indeed missed the farewell visit of both the colonel and Mr Darcy. As Lady Catherine no longer had more distinguished visitors invitations for the inhabitants of the parsonage began to flow again for the remaining week of Elizabeth´s and Mariah´s stay. During one dinner Miss De Bourgh managed to hand a letter from Miss Stamford to Elizabeth.

Lizzy longed to be home, to have time to herself and a chance to talk to Jane. She thought a lot about Mr Darcy´s letter and the facts she'd learned from Miss De Bourgh, truly contrite about her easy prejudices and sometimes even sorry for Mr Darcy for now she at least wished for him to have a partner in life with whom he could share his responsibilities.

Elizabeth began to see how he had become the person he was and though still appalled by his manners during his proposal she'd no longer resented him for them but rather pitied him for his inability to make himself agreeable to her.

That she even considered the possibility of him being agreeable to her gave her a little start but after getting used to the thought she saw the advantages of such a pairing - he could use a wife with easy manners and a playful disposition and she could benefit from his knowledge of the world. At this point Lizzy usually became a little bit uneasy - her practical self would question the wisdom of thinking about the two of them in such terms, now, when all likelihood of even seeing each other was slim.

And she regretted nothing, didn´t she, except her prejudices and some of her harsh words.

When Lizzy had managed to stop herself from thinking along those lines she´d inevitably hear „utmost forces of passion“ in her mind and would wonder how this passion would feel if reciprocated, as even his one-sided confession made her go all warm and send a tingle down her spine.

Miss De Bourgh´s letters were a fine distraction and even more so when Mrs Gardiner wrote to Lizzy that their much anticipated trip to the lakes would have to be postponed due to Mr Gardiner´s business. Elizabeth had hardly anything of great importance to write but telling stories of the youngest Lucas childrens scrapes during the cherry season and of her aunt´s futile search for a nanny because old Barbe´s feet were giving her trouble. They shared stitch samplers and discussed fashions - Miss De Bourgh having the means and Lizzy the ideas. As none of the desperation she had witnessed in Hunsford Park showed in her letters Lizzy became reconciled with her deception as their correspondence clearly gave Miss De Bourgh something to hold on. And they brought her joy. Especially Anne´s - after the fifth letter they had switched to first names - description of Mr Collins made her laugh often and she encouraged her friend to write little stories.

The stories showed a lot of spirit and ideas and that Anne´s reading miraculously hadn´t been confined to sermons for young ladies but also had covered tales of adventures and even some gothic novels.

Thus the days passed by in an inconspicious manner, only disrupted by the bustle Lydia´s leaving for Brighton created. Elizabeth had tried to persuade Mr Bennet from allowing her to go but to no avail. Her only reassurance was that her father planned to take Mrs Bennet to Brighton a little later - as a surprise trip for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Lizzy doubted the wisdom of her father´s decision of not telling his wife (or anyone else) of this trip - Mrs Bennet´s lamentations about not going surely were worse than her excitement about going - but was relieved. Surely a few weeks in Mrs Foster´s company couldn´t do much harm to Lydia.

Chapter 3

Posted on Wednesday, 30 July 2003,

One sunny day Elizabeth was out walking again, passing Netherfield on a ridge, when she remembered that this was the very spot from where she´d seen Mr Darcy first. Together with Mr Bingley had he raced towards the house.

Musing about how things would have turned out if he´d been a little more social and if she´d been a little less eager in believing Wickham´s lies, she didn´t notice the approach of a rider.

When horse and man where in front of her she thought her imagination to trick her.

„Miss Bennet.“

Even the voice was right - she was having an apparition in form of Mr Darcy! Elizabeth was about to decide whether to enjoy or whether to start worrying when she felt herself gently taken by the elbow.

„Do come out of the sun, Miss Bennet.“

„Mr Darcy!“

Indeed it was. Lines of worry showed in his face and he appeared a little thinner than in Hunsford but otherwise he looked quite the same.

„Forgive me for not greeting you properly, Mr Darcy, I didn´t expect to see you here.“

„I apologize for the intrusion but I am glad that I noticed you walking here when on my way to Longbourn. I have come to Hertfordshire to speak to you on a certain matter.“

Darcy had tried to prepare himself for this meeting but her reaction to his sight threw him off the track. When his futile search for Anne had dragged on Elizabeth was never far from his thought. So used he was to consult her in his mind that it occurred to him only when the last clue where to his cousin might have vanished was exhausted to ask Miss Bennet (and even Miss Lucas though he thought that unlikely and Mrs Collins had assured him that they didn´t write to each other).

He knew he was in a way torturing himself when imagining this discussions with Elizabeth - something that would never happen. Knowing that he should stop he always came up with excuses, his favourite being that this was no daydreaming but a way to improve his person and his ways through her point of view.

After the initial anger at her refusal he had to admit that she was right and even more, she was only stating what he thought to be right as well. Darcy felt quite confident that Elizabeth wouldn't find any faults in his dealings with friends, family, servants or tenants. On the other hand it was true - he had let himself go in Meryton, he hadn´t deemed the people there worthy of his best behaviour, he had assumed he could be rude without consequences. Darcy had to shake his head at the irony of all this - he had endured endless balls and soirees far more tedious than the Meryton assembly without giving offence but had ruined his suit with Elizabeth from the start there.

Sometimes he got a little bit annoyed that she hadn´t given him him a bit of credit or at least the benefit of doubt over Wickham´s lies but deep down he knew that it was her passionate and caring heart that had marked her an easy prey for Wickham.

So Darcy was not angry at her, he didn´t resent her, he admired her even more for her refusal.

When talking through this option with Col Fitzwilliam the colonel had immediately offered to ride to Meryton although in the same sentence he professed his opinion that Anne and Miss Bennet had had no more contact that what they had seen in Rosings. Darcy had felt a stab of jealousy at this and had hurried to point out that an unknown young man calling at Longbourn might attract attention neither Miss Bennet nor Lady Catherine would appreciate whereas he, Darcy, could go there with the pretense of either a letter from Mrs Collins or business with Bingley´s steward.

Col Fitzwilliam had conceded, reluctantly albeit and pressing on his cousin to give his best wishes to Miss Bennet.

While Darcy was prepared to face hostility or at least coldness when seeing Miss Bennet - on top of the awkwardness a meeting at Longbourn must produce due to the presence of her mother and sisters, namely Jane - he couldn´t make out her apparent confusion and subsequent blushes.

Trying to reassure her he offered

„Please believe me, I wouldn´t importune you any further wouldn´t it be necessary for someone else's benefit.“

Was that regret that had crept over her face very quickly or was he betraying himself in a most pathetic manner?

His saying it out loud made Elizabeth realise that now she wouldn´t feel to be unperturbed by a possibility to know him better even if this would only lead to nothing more that her being certain that they were not well matched.

Though Elizabeth by no means regretted her decision in April - no woman should say `yes´ to such a proposal - she felt a nagging doubt whether Mr Darcy should not play a part in her life, as adversary, as friend or as even more. If she went by her growing inability to ban him from her thoughts Elizabeth knew she was quickly moving from doubts to certainty. One thing she was sure of even yet - their acquaintance would never be boring.

Lizzy felt that her behaviour had confused Darcy and that nothing short of complete honesty would prevent further misunderstandings. She was well aware on the other hand that she had to be careful - if he still had feelings for her she would hurt him further if she let him see her doubts without knowing her own heart yet.

„I know that, Mr Darcy. Again I am sorry for my somewhat incoherent behaviour just now. On the meadow over there nearly a year ago I spotted two horsemen racing toward Netherfield, later learning that they were Mr Bingley and you. As I was just thinking on that your sudden appearance made me fear that I had too much sun.'“

When it hit Darcy that she´d told him she had been thinking of him just now - Bingley he let drop - it made him feel very lighthearted, despite the voice inside his head that told him to be cautious. Be it as it may - for once in his life this lightheartedness enabled him to say just the right thing.

„Apparitions in form of a rider do sport a white horse - I have been corrected more often than I can tell by my sister when telling her bedtime stories.“

Elizabeth´s laughter lasted longer that what was considered ladylike but Darcy was the last man to object - he had made her laugh, surely that must be a good sign? She was grateful for his ability - and willingness - to make the situation easier for them both.

„Thank you, Mr Darcy.“

Taking in the appearance of horse and rider - quite dusty - she continued

„You didn´t stop in Meryton or Netherfield, did you?“

Upon Darcy shaking his head she offered to take them to a small clearing by a brook nearby to water the horse. Darcy followed gladly. After he had tended to his horse and refilled his bottle Lizzy motioned for him to sit down and asked

„How can I be of help?“

„I don´t know how to put this delicately - my cousin Anne has run away from Rosings and Col Fitzwilliam and I are asking everyone she knows for clues - people or places she might have mentioned.“

Chapter 4

Posted on Sunday, 3 August 2003, at

Elizabeth´s genuine surprise came as a relief to Darcy, for he had considered the possibility of her helping Anne to flee.

„Is it absolutely certain that she left out of her own free will?“

„Yes, she left a letter for Lady Catherine, telling her not to worry but of course my aunt is frantic.“

Elizabeth had been truly surprised, not having expected such a thing from her correspondent but now she began to feel that she was partly to blame. She wondered how her deceitful letter-writing must appear to Mr Darcy and immediately scolded herself for such selfish thoughts when maybe Miss de Bourgh was in danger.

Lizzy decided to tell Mr Darcy everything.

„The first and only time I spoke to Miss de Bourgh for a longer time was the day you left Kent, when I happened upon her in the park. I was surprised by her openness, she talked about how difficult it was for her to stand up to her mother even on small matters and that she sometimes felt like suffocating at Rosings.“

Darcy´s mien fell during her speech. He raked his hair and then hid his face in his hands. After a while Elizabeth inquired

„Mr Darcy?“

He didn´t look up but in a weary voice said

„I knew how she felt, I knew it and I didn´t help her. I failed her just as I failed Georgiana.“

Not once did it occur to him that he was clearly overstepping the bounds of their relationship with that admission - so used he was to sharing his worries with her.

Elizabeth was stunned - by his openness and even more by her own need to reassure him.

„Forgive me for speaking plainly, Mr Darcy, but that´s nonsense.“

When he was looking up sharply she was prepared for him to be angry - the master of Pemberley was probably not often told that he was talking nonsense - but she´d rather have him angry than so hopeless.

What Lizzy couldn´t know was that - while Darcy was surprised by her candor - he was far too pleased by her taking an interest in his affairs for being annoyed.

„How so, Miss Bennet?“

„Miss de Bourgh said something along the lines that she cannot fault you for choosing your sister over your cousin - if she doesn´t think you failed her you shouldn´t either. And I do not see how you could have foreseen Wickham´s plot against your sister.“

„I should have looked into Mrs Younge's references more thoroughly. Her last one was from Lord Ashley who is keeping by no means a respectable household as I learned later.“

„Is this commonly known?“

„No, of course not.“

„Then you couldn´t have known either, at least not through casual enquiries and more than that would be quite impossible. Just imagine somebody looking closely into your affairs because he wants to hire a former servant of yours.“

„He wouldn´t dare.“

„Exactly. I do not know your sister, only Lady Catherine, but judging from the fear she put into Mariah Lucas, who is about the same age, I can well imagine her effect on a young woman, especially if she is just about to recover from a cruel disappointment. I think your decision not to invite them was right.“

Darcy didn´t appear to be thoroughly convinced but regarded her with gratitude. Elizabeth felt a flush creeping up her neck when she thought about the blow she was about to deal him.

„If there is anyone to blame for Miss de Bourgh´s flight it is probably me. I haven´t told you everything yet. Miss de Bourgh asked whether we could write to each other. I agreed, but then she wanted me to write under the guise of a Miss Stamford because she feared that her mother wouldn´t permit her such a correspondent as me. I didn´t like the idea but thought it a better solution than to deny her her request of writing entirely.“

Elizabeth watched Darcy´s mien going from surprised to disappointed to stern. She knew he was perfectly right to be angry with her but was surprised to what extent it bothered her, how much she wanted his esteem for her back. Lizzy would dearly have liked to defend herself but to remind him that one reason for her agreeing to the Miss - Stamford - scheme was that she didn´t want to hear again that she was not good enough for this family seemed unnecessarily cruel.

But she would stand her ground , she would neither cower nor would she shy away from taking responsibility for her actions.

„I have to admit - though mostly I only wanted to lend support to Miss de Bourgh - that I had other reasons that prompted me to accept. One is that I felt guilty for my first reaction upon happening on her - I wanted to back into the copse again. But then I thought I probably should have been more patient with her, given her more attention and maybe judged her on too short an acquaintance.“

Elizabeth blushed there as both didn´t need a reminder as to what all too quick judgment of hers she was referring.

„The reason I am not proud of is that I disregarded Lady Catherine´s wish to know her daughter´s correspondents out of petty reasons.“
She felt she needn´t elaborate here.

Darcy still looked serious and thoughtful. At length he spoke, after clearing his throat.

„I don´t want to sound presumptuous but you probably had a lot on your mind and even if it was not so, you had to decide quickly. I think you are being too harsh on yourself, you couldn´t have foreseen something like this and I am quite sure that your letters were of no great influence - if at all they might have made this happen earlier. - Can you think of any cues her letters can give? Did she mention places or people?“

„Not as far as I can remember. I will hand over her letters to see for yourself. After seeing her near desperation aver her situation at Rosings I scanned every letter for reappearances of such feelings. But on the contrary, she seemed to grow more content with her surroundings. I know from my own experience that even the nicest home can become oppressive sometimes. I am in the lucky position to be outside on my own quite a lot, something Miss de Bourgh very rarely can achieve. So I encouraged her to write, to let her mind wander, even if her feet cannot. Her description of Mr Collins is hilarious.“

„I do not want to violate your privacy - or Anne´s - by reading this letters.“

„I can see no harm in it and you would recognise if persons and places I assumed to be connected to your family are in fact not.“

Darcy nodded.

With a twinkle Elizabeth added

„I have to warn you - her last letter contained a very funny piece about what you´re probably thinking when in outward appearances conversing with your aunt.“

Darcy blushed a little but had to smile.

„So I am caught?“

„It seems so, sir.“

After their conversation had taken such a light turn Elizabeth sunk back to looking pensive.
Darcy tried to reassure her by saying

„Please do not fret, Miss Bennet. Going against Lady Catherine´s wishes is sometimes beneficial, from what you told me of your letters it seems that Anne´s disappearance and your decision are wholly unconnected. - Furthermore, I can fully understand that you´ve had enough condescension from our family.“

He had lowered his voice at this last sentence and Elizabeth sensed what it had cost him.

„Now you are too harsh on yourself. You should not equate yourself with your aunt.“

Trying to lighten the mood she added

„ You would not think about shelves in the closet while forgetting the chimney.“

He looked at her squarely, trying to gauge her meaning.

„No, indeed not. Mrs Collins´ chimney should be all right by now. My aunt means well but tends to get lost in details.“

With the pleasant scenery around them, Elizabeth relaxing again and even smiling slightly at him Darcy nearly got lost in details himself - details like her earlobes, a tendril on her neck or a small scratch on the back of her hand he would like to kiss.

As her regarded her with such intensity Lizzy got very self conscious suddenly. She began to feel the effects of sitting by a gently murmuring brook with Mr Darcy on a lovely summer day. Soon her thoughts would venture to daring places, like if she should show him the strawberries a little further up.

Mr Darcy broke the spell.

„What would you propose regarding the letters?“

„If you agree I´d rather not exchange them secretly.“

„I am glad that you are thinking along the same lines there. If I hadn´t spotted you here I would have called on your father with the pretense of a letter from Mr Collins, told him everything and asked for his permission to talk to you. But if he wants to see the letters, wouldn´t that put you in an awkward position, them being signed `Miss Stamford´?“

„I will confess everything to my father, ah, not everything but all concerning Miss de Bourgh and the letters. His judgment of the affair will not be too stern, I think.“

„Do you think your father will be home in the afternoon?“

„Yes, I don´t see why not.“

„Until then, Miss Bennet.“

„Good bye, Mr Darcy.“

They parted with a smile and each had much to think of on the way home.

Chapter 5

Posted on Thursday, 7 August 2003

Darcy did all he could to stop himself from hoping where he´d never dared to hope before - to no avail. He only realised that he was sporting a huge grin when he noticed the odd looks of the Netherfield staff.

Lizzy did hear neither Kitty´s complaining about her being too late for the promised walk to Meryton nor her mother´s scolding that too much sun was surely ruining her complexion - her bright red cheeks being proof of that.

She went upstairs to retrieve Anne´s letters, scanning them for any clues before venturing down again for the inevitable talk with her father.

Mr Bennet heard the story of the Misses Stamfords writing to each other with some amusement finding no great fault in deceiving Lady Catherine, as Lizzy had predicted. His demeanor turned more serious however upon hearing of Miss de Bourgh´s running away from home and how his daughter learned of it. Mr Bennet´s astonishment was complete when Elizabeth handed him a bundle of letters and told him to expect Mr Darcy later in the day.

„Do you think this Mr Darcy will cause a lot of trouble, Lizzy? Though I´d rather have him here than out on the fields with you, not what I´d expect from an honourable man, but of that pretense Wickham has cleared him thoroughly, mhm, my child?“

„No, Papá, my meeting Mr Darcy on the Netherfield border was a coincidence, he was on his way to Longbourne to tell you everything and ask your permission to talk to me. If I could have told him then that I know nothing he would be gone by now and no one in Meryton noticing his being in the neighbourhood. With the Lucases tendency to gossip and our close aquaintance with them you must understand that he took the chance of asking me on the spot - his first duty must be to protect his cousin´s reputation, a difficult enough task as I fear that Charlotte will have put everything together by now. And as to Mr Wickham - I am not at all sure anymore that he is an honourable man.“

As soon as the words had left her mouth Lizzy knew that she´d gone too far.

„My, my, child, what an ardent defense! I am surprised, but then you only said never to dance with the man again.“

Lizzy knew from experience that being her father´s object of teasing could be as embarrassing as it was painful and tried to extricate herself from the trap she´d jumped in so readily.

„Father, I feel bad about this Miss - Stamford - scheme and would do anything I could to get Miss de Bourgh back safely.“

„Quite so, but why is Mr Wickham the villain now instead of Mr Darcy? He´s been in Kent when you visited, wasn´t he? I thought you didn´t entertain us with a great many funny stories of his manners because you´d seen little of him - such a great family after all. But now it seems you´ve seen a lot of him, eh?“

Elizabeth couldn´t prevent a deep blush creeping up her neck and face. Mr Bennet watched his favourite daughter thoughtfully for a while and then spoke gently but in a very serious manner

„Lizzy, I know that an old man´s advice in matters of the heart is quite likely to go unheard, but please be careful. Men of Mr Darcy´s position in society do not look for wives in Meryton. I know that a king should be happy to gain your affection but - try not to loose your heart to Mr Darcy, you'll only face disappointment, of that I´m sure.“

Lizzy felt tears raise in her eyes, whether because of her father´s unexpected tenderness or his mistaking of the situation she didn´t know. Mr Darcy was the disappointed one, wasn´t he? Or did her father see more than Lizzy herself, was she already in trouble, already in love with Mr Darcy, now, when there could be no desirable outcome of the whole affair because no man would make a second offer? Certainly not such a proud man as Mr Darcy?

She tried to get a grip on herself - she needed to reassure her father quickly because she needed time to herself to follow this line of thought - another offer - in solitude.

„Do not worry, Papá. I don´t think my heart is in any danger.“

„I hope so, Lizzy, I hope so.“

Mr Bennet was worried. Not overly so, that wasn´t in his nature, but Elizabeth was his favourite child and he could work himself into real anger if someone would dare to hurt her. Generally trusting her judgment and never been too fond of Wickham´s tearstained stories (even secretly agreeing with Mr Darcy that Wickham was not born to be a parson) he decided to give Mr Darcy the benefit of doubt and to observe his interactions with Elizabeth closely.

Lizzy was frustrated. Another offer! Where did that come from? Her heart? Sure, it beat faster every time she thought of him but that had been the case before Hunsford too, because of indignation or anger or amusement sometimes. Furthermore she couldn´t get pictures of Mr Darcy and strawberries out of her mind - it sent a strange tingle down her spine. Were those thoughts the sinful thoughts Mary kept talking about? Were her difficulties to keep her thoughts in line a sign of being in love?

Hearing Jane´s voice on the landing brought another problem to Lizzy´s notice - should she prepare her sister for Mr Darcy´s visit? He'd probably call on her father without entering the drawing room. But Jane was bound to hear of his visit, so Elizabeth thought it wise to fill her in.

She accompanied her into the garden where they where collecting the last lavenders.

Jane heard her sister´s tale with composure until her meeting with Mr Darcy. Lizzy hastened to tell her he'd come to Netherfield alone and was to call on their father soon. Jane assure her sister of her perfect indifference, something Elizabeth commented with a grin only.

Chapter 6

Posted on Saturday, 16 August 2003, at

The time of the proposed visit drew near. Elizabeth occupied a seat next to the window, Lydia´s place usually, which brought her an enquiring glance from Jane.

She heard a horse but apparently its rider chose to go to the stables the other way round. They heard the front door and steps passing by towards the library. Mrs Bennet immediately lost any interest in the unknown visitor, assuming him to call on business.

It seemed a very long time to Lizzy until she heard the library door again. Involuntarily she held her breath. Mr Bennet poked his head through the door, addressing his wife

„My dear Mrs Bennet, would it inconvene you greatly to have a visitor for dinner?“

„You´re trying to vex me, Mr Bennet. I have put up with four extra guests on much shorter notice as you well remember, of course one guest is no problem.“

„Thank you, Mrs Bennet. - Lizzy, would you care to join me in the library, you can be of help I think.“

Elizabeth hadn´t been able to prevent a blush when learning of their dinner guest but was by the sufficiently composed again to follow her father. No one besides Jane had noticed her reaction so she thought but of course Mr Bennet had witnessed it as well.

Mr Darcy stood to greet her and her father explained

„There are some things mentioned in Miss de Bourgh´s letters which would need your letter to make sense, maybe you can help Mr Darcy there. - If you permit I will return to my lodgers.“

„Of course, Papá.“

Mr Bennet settled behind his desk and Elizabeth and Mr Darcy sat on the chairs in front of the hearth with Anne´s letter.

„I think I have a fairly good idea of who this Fernando is but I´d like your confirmation.“

„He´s the hero of a book she planned.“

„Ah, yes, the knight in shining armour, in this case ill-treated nobleman turned pirate?“

„The pirate is not decided yet, but basically yes, that´s Fernando.“

„Is he modeled on anyone?“

„My guess would be a dash of Col Fitzwilliam as he is the only sort of - knight she knows.“

„Sort of - knight! I will not betray Anne but this will make it a lot easier to bear my cousin´s teasing.“

Elizabeth´s laugh drew Mr Bennet´s attention. He´d watched Mr Darcy closely but could find no fault with him. Reserved he was but nothing in his demeanor indicated any unfavourable trait of character. If Mr Bennet hadn´t seen him in autumn he´d find him wholly agreeable. He meant to detect a certain fondness of his Elisabeth in Mr Darcy´s behaviour but couldn´t be sure. In any case did he nothing remotely untoward, if Lizzy would break her heart over him Mr Darcy could not be made responsible for it.

Mr Bennet would have to desist believing himself a good judge of character could he have read the minds of the two young people in front of him.

Mr Darcy had seen Elizabeth´s nervousness upon entering the library but he hadn´t missed her eyes lighting up on beholding him either. Now he marveled in the easy banter they shared and it took his imagination just a tiny leap to believe them to be in Pemberley´s library. If she could make him feel at ease under the scrutiny of her father what felicity would await them when married? Darcy was by now sure that Elizabeth not only believed what he´d written in his letter but was also prepared to regard him in a more favourable light. To what extent her change of heart was prompted by genuine affection or by trying to make up for her former prejudices and the harshness of her rejection he did´t dare to speculate. But of one thing he was sure - she would neither accept him out of mercenary nor out of prudent motives if he´d ever work up enough courage to ask her a second time. She would speak her heart. And if she said yes then he would be the happiest of men.

As much as her father´s first mentioning a dinner guest had quickened her heartbeat - now Elizabeth felt very much at peace. Somehow if felt right to sit with Mr Darcy in front of the hearth, engaged in delightful conversation. Though Lizzy had anticipated that her father would watch her the thought had left her the moment she laid eyes on Mr Darcy. Being not of a disposition to fret over things she had no influence over she decided to take the evening as it would come along.

„Do you mean to tell me you never tease back?“

„Occasionally I´ll try to think of something but hardly ever say anything aloud - it takes a light touch I fear I do not possess to tease without giving offense. I rather stay silent, cultivating my reputation as a great bore.“

Elizabeth had to chuckle again.

„Perhaps teasing is an overrated virtue, and one that would have no call at all wouldn´t there be people who bear being teased with grace. You should be proud of fulfilling such an important office.“

„I have no need for further consolations, your calling my cousin a sort of - knight is enough to make me bear everything with good humor. By the way, he bade me to send his greetings and to tell you that he´d liked to come himself.“

„Thank you, please send him my best wishes.“

Darcy warned himself that history had proven that he didn´t understand women in general and Elizabeth in particular but still was glad to see her casual and unaffected reaction to his mentioning Col Fitzwilliam´s greetings.

They had reached Anne´s last letter. After scanning it quickly Elizabeth handed it to Mr Darcy a bit reluctantly.

„If you´d rather I do not read it - I trust your judgment whether this letter could be instrumental in finding her.“

„Oh, no, read it. It is the one I told you about earlier, the one you feature heavily in.“

„As I told you, I am accustomed to being teased. I don´t think Anne is worse than Richard.“

Seeing Elizabeth´s eyes dancing merrily, full of mirth, Darcy dared to lean closer in a conspirationally way and started reading aloud said passage

„... Quite so, Aunt. - Must remember to talk to Reynolds about the crop rotation thing I read about, would do nicely on the western fields ... Mhm - I wonder whether the new foal of Tarrega he wrote of is as terrific as his mother, maybe I should train it for Georgiana, she might like a more spirited horse by then - Yes, Lady Catherine - Oh, h--, what I´d agreed to now, can´t she just stop and clear the path for Miss Bennet on the piano, preferably without insulting her? - The foal won´t be ready for a while, I think I´ll order the Broadwood for her birthday and try to find out how she feels about a new horse. - Aunt Catherine is looking far too pleased, Darcy, pay attention! I agreed to prolong my stay? Could have been worse. - Georgiana is practising very constantly, Aunt! - She really should leave my little dumpling alone - Ah, Miss Bennet opens the piano, what a relief - Rich beat me to turning the pages again, sly fox, well, my fault really ...“

Darcy stopped there, more than a little embarrassed. Elizabeth took pity on him and asked

„If Reynolds is your steward and Tarrega a horse indeed we´re none the wiser, aren´t we?“

„Well, ah, yes, entirely correct.“

Lizzy couldn´t suppress a chuckle and looked at him expectantly.

„Reynolds is my steward and Tarrega a horse and everything else is quite as Anne wrote it as well.“

Darcy could not but be a little bit miffed - as much as he liked Miss Bennet´s amused smile on him. That he was read so easily was bad enough but what really bothered him was that he´d never suspected Anne to have such depths.

Upon beholding his changed countenance Lizzy was disappointed as she attributed it to his annoyance with being made fun of. Not wanting to end their pleasant afternoon on discord she remarked

„Come, sir, you cannot be truly offended by this piece of fun.“

Darcy smiled at her.

„No, I am not offended, but I am annoyed with myself for underestimating Anne to such an extent.“

Elizabeth could not reply as Mr Bennet addressed Mr Darcy

„Would you care for something fortifying before dinner at Longbourne, it might serve you well, I assure you.“

Lizzy blushed out of shame because her father was belittling his family in this manner. She could however do nothing about it and as Mr Darcy seemed to bear it with humor she took her father´s interference as a clue to leave and change before dinner.

Chapter 7

Posted on Wednesday, 20 August 2003, at

So surprised was Mrs Bennet by Mr Darcy´s presence at her dinner table that Elizabeth fears were groundless. Her mother even forgot about her pronounced dislike of that man long enough to give him a chance to get into her good graces again with his praise for the partridges.

Mr Darcy was seated to the right of Mr Bennet, across from Jane who sat next to Elizabeth. After the first courses Mrs Bennet interrupted her husband and his guest

„Pray Mr Darcy, do you have any news of Mr Bingley?“

Elizabeth felt for her sister acutely at this moment and Darcy could not miss the stiffening of Jane´s back. He chose his words carefully and answered as calmly as possible

„He is about to return from an extended stay with his family in the North. His sisters expressed a wish to visit Pemberley in the summer but I think he should be at his own estate during harvest time even if his steward is a very able man. But he is his own master, I must not presume anything.“

Seeing Jane´s eyes light up and at the same time her modest outward appearance Darcy wondered how he ever could have mistaken her serenity for lack of regard for his friend. He sensed Elizabeth giving Jane´s hand a reassuring squeeze and nearly dropped his potato when she met his glance with a dazzling smile. It lasted only a moment because Elizabeth, aware of her father´s scrutiny of her behavior towards Darcy, dropped her eyes to her plate again.

Dinner passed in an inconspicuous manner - rather an unusual occurrence at Longbourne. Mary warmed to her partner on the left, mainly due to his extensive knowledge of books. Mr Darcy himself was pleasantly surprised to learn that - after he had stirred the conversation away from Fordyce - Miss Mary Bennet had read a lot of classics and done even more thinking on them. She had drawn conclusion from them that weren´t his own but still showed a sharp mind. Mary was having one of the best evenings in her life, even more so when she noticed that her father took a real interest in her part of the conversation too. Jane only marveled in her sister´s happiness but Lizzy was mortified and angry with herself for not having taking her bookish little sister more seriously before. That Mr Darcy of all people had managed to bring out the best in Mary made her remember her other misconceptions. On receiving a puzzled glance from Darcy she tried for an outward appearance of cheerfulness, saving to repent for her neglect of Mary for later. Elizabeth was relieved that a smile of reassurance at Darcy had managed to communicate to him at least that he was not the source of her displeasure.

Mrs Bennet, naturally inclined to think each of her daughters worth the notice of even the most eligible bachelors in England was still a bit surprised in witnessing Mary´s rosy cheeks and animated discussion with Mr Darcy but was pleased nonetheless - he had praised the partridges, obviously admired Mary and had ten thousand a year, her heart swelled with motherly pride.

Dessert brought on a small crisis. When the servants brought in plain strawberries, accompanied only by bowls of sweet cream and sugar Mrs Bennet frantically waved for the housekeeper who was standing in the door, obviously expecting such a reaction from her mistress. Their whispered conference - Mrs Bennet nervous, the housekeeper apologetic and calming convinced Darcy that something hadn´t gone as planned with the dessert and the strawberries were a replacement - one highly welcome to him. Mr Bennet´s amused smile and Elizabeth´s and Jane´s uneasiness confirmed his suspicion that they were now to expect an outburst from Mrs Bennet, awkward at least. Darcy chose to take the bull by its horns

„Mrs Bennet, what a delightful idea! My sister serves strawberries the same way, convinced that they need no enhancement. And my aunt Lady Matlock follows her example now, much to the delight of all family members.“

Mr Bennet was mightily diverted and quite sure now that Mr Darcy was not only fond of Elizabeth but madly in love with her. Mrs Bennet only managed a

„Why, yes, thank you, Mr Darcy.“

Elizabeth´s look of gratitude made Darcy throw caution in the wind as he added

„I will risk your censure on us barbaric Northerners by confessing that we eat them with our fingers.“

This drew a delighted chuckle from Kitty who immediately dropped her spoon. When Mr Bennet dryly remarked

„Kent is south of us, you wouldn´t dare to do this anywhere near Lady Catherine de Bourgh, would you?“

The whole situation dissolved in laughter.

„Indeed I would not.“

Was Darcy´s only answer while picking up a strawberry.

General conversation ensued about Pemberley and Miss Darcy, a subject which made even Kitty overcome her awe of their visitor. Lizzy followed the conversation only halfheartedly so distracted she was. Her mind seemed capable of focusing on details only - Mr Darcy´s long and lean fingers picking up a strawberry, his lips, soft and relaxed now, glimpses of his teeth.

As dinner drew to a close Darcy found himself surprised by Miss Kitty Bennet as the girl - under many blushes - handed him a little embroidered cushion, filled with lavender, as a gift for Georgiana. Mrs Bennet didn´t know what to think - Mr Darcy had given Jane reason to hope again and now Mary and Kitty seemd to be fond of him as well. How very odd! Mr Bennet´s heart filled with sorrow in the course of the evening as he realised that his Lizzy was clearly besotted with the man. To have found out that Darcy matched her feelings was only a small consolation, Mr Bennet had no longer to worry over Eliazbeth´s heartbreak but over his own, Derbyshire being a long way off.

Lizzy was very quiet, an unusual occurrence as the previous evenings had been filled with her talking happily about her much anticipated travels with the Gardiners, a subject that hadn´t even been mentioned this evening. Elizabeth herself was elated, mortified, embarrassed, hopeful, devastated all at the same time. Mortified by her realization that now she´d gladly accept the offer she'd spurned not so long ago, embarrassed by her thoughts, hopeful and elated by their talk in the library and devastated because neither did she know when or if they would meet again nor if there would ever be more to their relationship than being acquaintances. A talk with her father might have put her at ease but Lizzy didn´t think of it, this afternoon´s interview with him had already embarrassed her enough.

Darcy did not know what to feel and think. Although he had allowed himself to relax during dinner he could not be so much at ease as when being alone with her. But he felt safe in the knowledge that he would see her again soon. He would tell Bingley everything and then accompany him back to Hertfordshire. Then he´d court her properly, he wouldn´t think ahead for now, courting must be enough.

To his disappointment Elizabeth did hardly raise her eyes when time had come to say farewell. Even if he quite rightly attributed her uncommon shyness to a change of heart he would have liked to see her parting smile.

Darcy rode off with the rest of the families best wishes.

Chapter 8

Posted on Sunday, 24 August 2003, at

He was gone and Elizabeth felt it keenly. Whenever possible she walked up to the little brook and lost herself in dreams. Never having been one to dwell on things she couldn´t remedy Lizzy could not bring herself out of her state. Not on this. Oh yes, Darcy had hinted at bringing Bingley back to Hertfordshire but when? And what if Bingley wouldn´t go? What if they came when she was away with the Gardiners? When would she see him again? Elizabeth had missed Jane when she had been in London but never ever had she experienced such longing for anyone. Her trip to the Lakes, normally a source of joyous anticipation lost nearly all its appeal. Jane noticed Elizabeth´s state, as well as Mr Bennet, and both tried to draw her out as much as possible but with little success.

Time did do the trick. Some ten days after Darcy´s visit Lizzy regained her usual good humor. Now she was able to find pleasure in her memories, to be thankful that fate - or Anne - had thrown them together and that, even though she could not be sure of Darcy still being in love with her they were at least on friendly terms. He didn´t hate her for her harsh words and did not resent her earlier prejudices. And they would see each other again, at Jane and Charles wedding at the latest.

Mr Bennet made his wife a very happy woman when telling her of his plan of taking her to Brighton. Kitty, who had been looking forward to tending to her little Gardiner cousins with Jane was torn between her wish to do so and her wish to accompany her parents. When she thought of how Lydia would crow in her superior knowledge of everything and everyone in Brighton and how she had enjoyed the previous weeks without the overpowering presence of her younger sister the sea-bath lost its appeal. Mrs Bennet´s fear that she might miss Mr Bingley´s visit and therefore not be here to guide Jane properly this time were quelched by Mr Bennet´s assurances that they would return home immediately should Bingley come. Therefore it was agreed that Mr and Mrs Bennet would leave for Brighton the day Lizzy and the Gardiners would leave for the Lakes, the Gardiner children staying at Longbourn under the care of Jane, Mary, Kitty and Hill. Gowns were to be prepared, trunks to be packed, neighbours visited for farewells, time flew by.

Mrs Gardiner had anticipated Lizzy´s disappointment upon telling her that - due to Mr Gardiner´s business - they had to shorten their travels and confine them to Derbyshire. She was surprised by her favourite niece´s reaction, Lizzy only blushed and stammered and seemed well pleased with their change of plans.

Lizzy´s reasoning was thus - if she was to miss him in Hertfordshire she would at least be in his country and therefore being able to feel somehow connected to him. And if he did´t come to Hertfordshire soon it was more likely that he was in Pemberley than in London. Elizabeth didn´t think of ever meeting him in Derbyshire but the thought that they might be looking up at the same stars, might be grazed by rain from the same cloud, that the same wind that played with the ribbons of her bonnet might have tousled his hair made her happy.

The two parties left in high spirits and the remaining one was not too troubled by the farewells, save Samuel, the Gardiners youngest, but he soon was quieted by a promise from Aunt Mary that she would take him for a fishing excursion.

Lizzy enjoyed the company of her aunt and uncle and delved with enthusiasm into helping them plan the details of their journey. They were to visit Oxford and Blenheim, were to tour many a fine houses and gardens and would end their traveling round by a weeks stay in Lambton, the little village Mrs Gardiner had spent part of her youth. Elizabeth liked what she saw in Derbyshire. The landscape, though not as gently as at her home, appealed to her sense of beauty. Ever so often did she imagine Darcy to have traveled the very road they were on or to have stopped in some particular inn.

Finally they were in Lambton, a small market town. When they were settled at the inn Mrs Gardiner dispatched notes to all her friends, alerting them to her presence in town. As they could only wait for answers and as the weather was uncommonly fine Mrs Gardiner wanted to visit the manor not five miles from Lambton. Lizzy professed being tired of fine manors and that she´d rather spend today outdoors.

„But Lizzy, its gardens are some of the finest in the whole of England. Besides, wouldn´t you want to see where Wickham grew up?“

Lizzy blushed heavily which made Mrs Gardiner start because she did think Mr Wickham a charming enough man but not a good match for Elizabeth. Mr Bennet had thought of telling the Gardiners about his suspicions concerning Lizzy and Mr Darcy when he had heard of their changed plans but he had refrained from it, he trusted his daughter too much for having reason to violate her confidence. So Mrs Gardiner knew nothing more than what she´d known at Christmas.

„We are only five miles from Pemberley!“

„Oh, yes, nearly all the land you see her belongs to that estate and Lambton owns it much of her prosperity. But Lizzy, you haven´t formed an attachment to Mr Wickham, have you? I didn´t think you to be in any danger in December.“

„Mr Wickham? Oh no, I have long since learned that he is by no means to be trusted. I am sorry for ever allowing him to single me out. - No, I am just surprised, that is all.“

Mrs Gardiner wisely didn´t enquire any further, she knew that Lizzy would turn to her if necessary, in her own time.

„So you will accompany us?“

Lizzy explained to her aunt of how she´d feel like an intruder, that under no circumstances would she wanted to be found on his grounds by Mr Darcy. Mrs Gardiner laughed.

„Oh, Lizzy, the house is huge and so are the gardens. Would there be forty Mr Darcy´s around we´d still have a very good chance of meeting not one of them. But the family isn´t even there the landlord has told me.“

But still Elizabeth felt she couldn´t go and she did stand firm in her refusal, leaving the puzzled Gardiners to go on their own.

Lizzy was left to dwell on her newly acquired knowledge. Pemberley not five miles from here! He must have walked every street of Lambton, passed through the door of the inn on numerous occasions, must have ridden to the smithy. If the family were there she might have even seen him in church!

The church. Lizzy needed fresh air to clear her head so she told the maid that she´walk into the direction of the church. From behind the church beckoned the open land and she headed its call. After walking along a path for a while she found a shady place a little off and sat down under a tree. Gazing over yellow cornfields Elizabeth wondered whether Darcy wouldn´t come to Pemberley shortly, having professed his opinion that a master should be at his estate during harvest time.

When thinking of going back she heard a lone horse approach slowly. She decided to let it pass and then return to the inn.

Chapter 9

Posted on Thursday, 28 August 2003, at

The horse seemed to have lost an iron because its rider was walking besides it, hidden from Lizzy´s view. Nevertheless it looked magnificent, if tired now, to her eyes. Good enough for the finest horseman in Derbyshire she thought.

When man and beast were passing her tree they slowed down as if contemplating whether to rest or to carry on for another mile into Lambton. The rider turned into Lizzy´s direction and seemed to freeze.

He raised his hand to shield his eyes against the sun and then shook his head, as if to rid himself from a vision. In a slow gait he led his horse towards her tree. Lizzy, who had by then recognized Mr Darcy, scrambled to her feet. Some yards before her he didn´t speak so she dropped a curtsey and greeted him nervously

„Good day, Mr Darcy.“

„Miss Bennet!“

Neither spoke more and Lizzy began to feel even more uncomfortable. At length she enquired, after a look at his horse

„I hope you haven´t had to walk for long.“

„Ah, no, just about two miles. Forgive me for not greeting you properly, today I was believing to have an apparition. I didn´t expect to see you here , I have just left Netherfield.“

So he had accompanied Bingley! Elizabeth smiled and blushed and asked

„Did you see my family?“

„Yes, I did. They are all in excellent health, only Miss Mary Bennet seemed to suffer from a slight cold due to a somewhat adventurous fishing trip. She was in excellent spirits however.“

„I am glad to hear it, I haven´t heard from them since we left. Did you come with Mr Bingley?“

As soon as she had spoken Elizabeth realized how odd this must sound - why would he be in the area without Bingley?

„Yes, I did.“

If he noticed her slip he didn´t show it.

Words seemed to fail them again until Darcy enquired after her travel companions. Blushing again Lizzy could only look at her shoes and mumbled

„They are viewing Pemberley today.“

„You wouldn´t want to accompany them?“

There was something akin to hurt in his voice, rejection. Lizzy forced herself to look up. As embarrassing it would be, she couldn´t let him suffer because he attributed her staying away from Pemberley to the wrong reasons.

„It didn´t feel right.“

Mr Darcy didn´t seem to understand so she continued

„I felt I had no right to go there.“

It dawned on Darcy that she had chosen not to visit Pemberley for the same reason she had been unable to look at him when saying her farewells after dinner at Longbourn. His heart leaped and an expression of heartfelt delight diffused over his face. Knowing the importance of his next question he phrased it carefully

„Would you do me the great honour of allowing me to show you Pemberley?“

Still with high colour but a shy smile she answered

„The honour would be mine, sir.“

Their gaze locked and for once both knew that they would overcome every obstacle that may lay ahead.

Darcy broke the spell by asking

„May I accompany you to Lambton?“

„Of course, I was about to go back.“

After some awkward attempts at conversation they soon found back to their old ease. Neither did notice the astonished looks of the good people of Lambton at seeing the young master deep in conversation with an unknown young lady.

They reached the inn at the same time as the Gardiner´s carriage came to a halt in front of it.

Mrs Gardiner recognized Mr Darcy from his portrait in the gallery at Pemberley and for a moment felt for her niece because the very thing she´d wanted to avoid seemed to have happened.

But a few glances at the young people convinced her that there was more between them that Lizzy had let on and one look at her face showed Mrs Gardiner that she needn´t fear - Elizabeth looked happier than she´d ever seen her.

Mr Darcy asked for an introduction and after some polite conversation issued an invitation for dinner at Pemberley for the following evening which was accepted by Mr Gardiner.

Darcy said his farewells and continued on to the blacksmith. When turning into his yard he saw that Elizabeth was still standing where he´d left her as her uncle was talking to the carriage's driver.

She was looking after him.

Chapter 10

Posted on Saturday, 6 September 2003

Mrs. and Mr. Gardiner had seen much to interest them but nothing to justify an enquiry. They were content with witnessing the happy glow on Lizzy's countenance. Mrs Gardiner had communicated to her husband how odd and rather unfounded she'd thought her niece's professed reasons for not visiting Pemberley to be. But now everything made sense.

Lizzy was looking forward to their dinner engagement at Pemberley with nervous anticipation. Though she dreaded the Bingley sisters' presence, she longed to get acquainted with Darcy's sister. The following day was spent with calls on Mrs. Gardiner's friends in Lambton and, after making the best of their finest travel clothes, they set off to Pemberley.

Mr. Darcy and his sister were waiting for them on the entrance steps. They were told that Miss Bingley and the Hursts were not down yet. Miss Darcy seemed to be truly embarrassed by this piece of incivility but Mr. Darcy secretly applauded them - it would give him a chance to show his beloved Pemberley to his beloved Elizabeth.

As the Gardiners had already seen the principal rooms they settled in the drawing room with Mrs Annesley. Mr. and Miss Darcy set off with Elizabeth, of course, to the music room first. Lizzy admired the Broadwood and was so lost in the beautiful view from that room that she had agreed to play after dinner without her knowledge.

She was embarrassed when realizing how her wistful gaze over Pemberley's grounds could be interpreted and quickly turned away from the window. Under her brother's gentle guidance Miss Darcy was participating more in the conversation than before and Mr. Darcy encouraged her, in every way. Sometimes, when the young woman refused his offer of saying something about a particular room they were viewing, Elizabeth detected a smile of amused indulgence for her brother's enthusiasm for showing Pemberley in Georgiana.

Elizabeth realized that an intelligent and quick-witted girl lived behind that shy exterior, one that admired and loved her brother as much as he did her. She felt anger rise when thinking of how Wickham had used and deceived this innocent girl, and shame about herself being so easily taken in by that scoundrel as well. But today was a day to be happy.

The presence of Miss Bingley and the Hursts had been a surprised but Mr. Darcy explained that the engagement had been made long before, including Mr. Bingley, of course. Bingley had asked Darcy to keep it, even when he went back to Netherfield - one could only wonder why.

They proceeded throughout the principal rooms and gradually Lizzy became at ease again. When they were nearly finished Mrs Reynolds, the housekeeper, approached Georgiana with a question concerning dinner. She excused herself and followed Mrs Reynolds. Darcy was unsure how to proceed.

„Is there anything else you'd like to see, Miss Bennet?“

Lizzy knew that it wasn't strictly proper to be alone with Mr Darcy but she couldn't resist.

„I would really like to see your library.“

Mr Dary's face lit up.

„Indeed, you cannot leave Pemberley without seeing the library!“

The room was truly magnificent, walls and walls of books and yet it didn't feel uninhabited like some of the libraries Elizabeth had seen in other manors she'd viewed with the Gardiners. Huge though it was, it was a comfortable room. Elizabeth was always comfortable and at home in a library, anyway.

Walking along the shelves she looked and admired while Darcy watched her uninhibited joy with delight. Upon leaning down to inspect a volume of poetry on one of the lower shelves Lizzy noticed some scratches on the board, very like the ones in her father's library in Longbourn.

„Why, Mr. Darcy, did no one tell you to climb the shelves in stockings only if you mean to be undetected?“

Darcy laughed.

„You caught me there, Miss Bennet, and my father did indeed, too. But as I had climbed up in search of a book rather than for the sake of climbing alone he was not too severe on me.“

They were standing quite close to each other and right then Elizabeth was very sure that indeed she would have been truly happy with staying in Derbyshire, at Pemberley, in this library, with this man.

Mr. Darcy read a fond regard in her expression, fonder that he'd ever seen and although he couldn't be sure that it wasn't only brought on by her imagining a little boy climbing up and down the shelves he meant to take his chances.

„Miss Bennet, I ...“

„Mr. Darcy, there you are!“

Miss Bingley couldn't have chosen a more inconvenient moment. Darcy and Lizzy momentarily froze and then resigned themselves to their fate. Darcy tried to convey his intentions with an intense look and some of his apprehension left him when, upon offering his arm to Elizabeth, he felt her pressing his for a moment.

Elizabeth didn't know whether to jump at Miss Bingley for interrupting them or just be happy that there had been something to interrupt. She was a bit embarrassed about her own daring but felt that she couldn't leave him without an answer if she indeed had read his intentions rightly. Dary's almost inaudible sigh after her squeeze and the fond smile told her that she'd been right.

Since Mr. Darcy had seen to ensure the seating arrangements were to his liking, Elizabeth could enjoy her evening thoroughly. Miss Bingley was seated far off at the other end of the table and though Lizzy heard more than one snide comment from her, Lizzy was more proud of her relations truly well bred attempts to deflect them than hurt by them.

Miss Darcy, after overcoming her initial shyness under the careful guidance of her brother, turned out to be a delightful partner for conversation. Darcy was nearly content with watching his favourite people in the world getting along with each other fabulously.

When in the library with Mr. Gardiner, Darcy was pleased to find him such a genteel and witty gentleman. Mr. Gardiner was pleased as well with what he saw in the young man and so - even if both men had secretly vowed for different reasons to keep the separation of sexes as short as possible, they found themselves caught in pleasant conversation, with Hurst snoring on the settee.

Chapter 11

Posted on Friday, 12 September 2003,

Meanwhile in the drawing room things went as anyone could have predicted, knowing Miss Bingley and Miss Bennet were in one room together, and at Pemberley no less. Miss Bingley tried by her pointed questions to Mrs. Gardiner of the lady`s origins to stress with Miss Darcy the Gardiners inferiority and her own superiority. Even if Georgiana hadn't been determined to follow her brother's example concerning Miss Bennet and her relatives, she had the good sense to see for herself who was truly well bred and genteel.

Elizabeth was only aware of half of the exchanges as she still felt like she was floating on a cloud of happiness. Mrs. Gardiner did not want an otherwise perfect evening for her niece to be spoilt by Miss Bingley and her own patience was already wearing thin. Without being overtly rude and thus embarrassing her very young hostess her only possibility in replying to Miss Bingley's venomous last barb was to talk non-stop.

„Pray tell, Miss Eliza, what a very great coincidence! To meet with Mr. Darcy in such a fashion!“

Miss Bingley made it sound like a certainty that there had been no coincidence whatsoever but the extended Bennet family had been laying in wait for Mr. Darcy all over Derbyshire to throw their undeserving offspring into his path. This had finally brought Elizabeth down from her cloud and she paid attention to her aunt's reply. Mrs Gardiner was telling in detail stories of odd coincidences, beginning from her early childhood. A guarded look showed her that neither Miss Darcy nor Mrs. Annesley disapproved of her tactics, in fact they were trying hard not to show their amusement on beholding the Bingley sisters looking very much like landed fish whenever one of them tried to interject.

„... and a most wondrous thing happened only some weeks ago. After desperately looking for a suitable nanny for quite some time a young woman showed up at our doorstep. She claimed to have heard about the position when overhearing the lady she'd been companion to telling a friend of a letter in which an acquaintance of mine had mentioned it. Unbelievable, don't you think?“

Elizabeth froze. Though she couldn't know to whom else her aunt had written of her futile search for a nanny, she was sure to have told of it herself to only one person. Coincidence indeed!

„So how is the new nanny?“

Elizabeth enquired, already dreading the answer. Miss Bingley didn't hide her contempt at them discussing so decidedly unfashionable domestic topics and even Mrs. Annesley was wondering why Miss Bennet had chosen to participate in the conversation now of all times, after having been lost in dreamy stares for quite some time now.

„At first I was afraid of her not being strong enough, you of course know how spirited your young cousins are, Lizzy, and Annie is a frail thing. But my fears came to naught, the children love her and sometimes I get the impression that Annie enjoys their games as much as the children do. If they hadn't already been looking forward to spending time with their Longbourn cousins I would have left them in her care without worrying.“

Lizzy had paled during her aunt's speech, the first name, the frailty, even the joy in finally being allowed to play children's games ... Mrs Gardiner's new nanny had to be Anne de Bourgh!

Momentary relief to know her to be safe soon gave way to misery. She was to be blamed for Anne's flight after all! How this must affect Mr. Darcy´s estimation of her! Elizabeth knew the inevitable conclusion. At best she could hope that Miss de Bourgh's temporary occupation could be concealed from Lady Catherine, sparing the innocent Gardiners her wrath.

For now she had to tell Mr. Darcy; there was not an instance to lose.

With a reassuring smile at her aunt and Miss Darcy, Elizabeth rose, excused herself and went in search of the library.

The gentlemen were just about to rejoin the ladies, Mr. Hurst looking slightly disheveled, as if disturbed from a nap.

„Mr. Darcy, may I request a private audience with you and my uncle?“

Upon seeing her pale features and serious manner Darcy instantly worried but couldn't come up with a reason for her obvious distress. He nodded and led them to his private study. There he offered her a glass of wine which she declined.

Wringing her hand Elizabeth spoke

„I must beg you to trust my uncle to be present when I explain, I assure you that he will keep the matter quiet, even more so as it affects him as well.“

By then Mr Gardiner was worried too.

„Pray, speak, Miss Bennet.“

„My aunt just now told me of her new nanny and I have every reason to believe that she is no other than your missing cousin, Miss de Bourgh. Right now she should be safe in the home of my aunt and uncle in Cheapside.“

Both men sat in astonished silence, so Elizabeth continued.

„My aunt gave her name as Annie and described her as frail.“

Mr. Gardiner was deep in thought. Although he preferred the nanny of his children to be a runaway young lady rather than a runaway convict the fact remained, they had been deceived by her. Mr. Darcy was puzzled because of Elizabeth's serious demeanour, he thought that she'd be relieved that Anne was found. Soon it came to him however - Anne had used Elizabeth and the Gardiners, she had deceived them, she had abused Miss Bennet's trust. The revelation shocked him. Although he'd suspected for a long time that Anne's illnesses often were means to escape Lady Catherine's ministrations he hadn't thought her capable of such cunning, willful deceit.

After being subjected to his aunt's rudeness and his own - flinching he remembered his proposal - Miss Bennet now must be thoroughly appalled by his family's lack of manners, lack of character even. And he had had the audacity to criticize Miss Bennet's family! Ironic indeed!

Elizabeth caught Darcy's expression upon these thoughts, the sarcastic snarl of his lips, and her heart sank. So saddened she was by the turn of events of rather by the effect they were having on Mr. Darcy that she found herself incapable of being glad for Anne's sake.

Mr. Gardiner spoke up

„Mr. Darcy, Lizzy, I don't mean to pry but I would like an explanation.“

„Certainly sir. Miss Bennet, with your permission ...“

Lizzy nodded her acquiescence and Mr Darcy told in brief sentences all they knew about Anne's flight. Mr. Gardiner listened in astonishment.

„Well, at least Miss de Bourgh is safe. She gave her name as Anne Burham and had an excellent letter of recommendation from a Mrs. Stamford to whom she'd served as a companion, or so the letter stated. She told us that her former employer had gone to tour the continent with a cousin, that was why I didn't seek confirmation from Mrs. Stamford herself. That, and the fact that we were in dire need of a new nanny as the children's exuberance is getting too much for our dear Barbe.“

Mr. Gardiner didn't say anything further but both Darcy and Lizzy could sense that having been deceived by Miss de Bourgh didn't sit well with him.

„With your permission, Mr. Gardiner, I would like to go to your house and fetch my cousin as soon as possible.“

„I think it would be prudent if we go as well. I respect your wish to protect your cousin, Mr Darcy, but if we arrive together the disruption of my household will be as little as possible.“

After some protest from Mr. Darcy that they shouldn't shorten their stay because of him it was agreed to go to London together on the morrow.

Chapter 12

Posted on Sunday, 21 September 2003,

Their return to the drawing room was subdued.

Seeing that Miss Bennet was still too unsettled to perform Mr Darcy asked Miss Bingley to open the piano after the party had proceeded to the music room. Mr Darcy appraised his sister and Mr Gardiner his wife of the turn of events in whispered conversations. Lizzy sat in silence, pretending to hear Miss Bingley´s performance, aching. She had felt so sure of his continuing regard, she even felt guilty of doubting it now - but how else was his mood to be interpreted?

After turning the pages for Georgiana it was her turn. Lizzy feared that her voice would falter but yet wanted to play a certain Mozart aria she´d often dreamed of playing for Darcy. She stumbled and slurred through the introduction and at some passages felt tears rising in her throat. But she went through with it, conveying all her love into the music. Upon playing the last notes she looked at him and for some precious moments could deceive herself that nothing had changed.

As they had to make an early start the party broke up soon afterwards. Elizabeth had by then sufficiently recovered to bid farewell to Georgiana cheerfully. Yet when Mr Darcy handed her into the carriage she was unable to meet his eyes. His hand lingered holding hers a little longer than strictly necessary but when she was able to raise her eyes he was already speaking to Mr Gardiner about the time of their departure to London. The carriage drove on and Lizzy turned around. Darcy was still standing there, outlined against the facade of Pemberley.

Mrs Gardiner - besides being occupied with packing - was too worried and annoyed to notice the dramatic change in her niece's mood. Mr Darcy´s carriage had called for them at the appointed time and now - after initial polite conversation they sat in heavy silence. Though everybody knew about Miss de Bourgh, they were reluctant to talk about her. Mr and Mrs Gardiner sensed that Mr Darcy was embarrassed and ashamed as well for his cousin and that he´d rather not mention her. Darcy had yet another reason to avoid the topic: he didn´t want to remind Miss Bennet of Anne´s infamous behavior, he still had hopes that, after returning Anne safely to her mother, he might win Elizabeth´s hand.

Lizzy was alternately hoping and despairing. Hoping when thinking of those moments - in the library, during her song, when he was handing her into the carriage - and despairing when looking at his stern face now.

Mrs Gardiner´s good sense and understanding might have enabled her to find out why the unacknowledged lovers were unhappy but she was preoccupied, busily reproaching herself for hiring somebody to look after her children without following up the references closely.

They traveled as far as possible the first day, having agreed on making the journey in two days instead of three. After supper in a simple but friendly inn Lizzy glanced out through the window longingly. She could see fields stretching in the settling dusk.

Darcy caught her eye and enquired

„Miss Bennet, would you like to take a short walk? We will be confined to the carriage for the whole day again tomorrow.“

He was rewarded with her first genuine smile that day as she´d desperately had wanted to stretch her legs but had known it to be impossible for her to walk around on her own. Besides that she didn´t want to spend another day like today - to sit across from him and yet to be as far from him as possible. She would talk to him.

After fetching her bonnet Lizzy took Darcy´s proffered arm and they set off. Both did not speak and Elizabeth felt the man next to her being very tense. It appeared to her that he was about to speak several times but nothing came.

The crisp and clear evening helped her to calm down enough to attempt to address him herself. Just then Darcy spoke

„Miss Bennet, I cannot tell you how very sorry I am for Anne´s , ah, behaviour. Although I am glad the she is safe at the Gardiners house I am utterly ashamed for her deceiving you and your family in such a fashion.“

Lizzy interrupted him there

„Please, Mr Darcy, do not berate yourself for what your cousin did, believe me - neither my aunt nor uncle nor I for the matter do hold it against you! It would be mightily hypocritical from me as well - had I not agreed to be Miss Stamford this wouldn´t have been possible.“

„Maybe, Miss Bennet, but you just presented means to her she would otherwise have found somewhere else. And even writing under your own name wouldn´t have prevented her flight. But as to her motives - I knew that she found Lady Catherine overbearing and yet didn´t do anything about it.“

„No, that is not true. You visited regularly and you invited her go Pemberley too. - “ Elizabeth hesitated, she´d rather not criticize Anne before him but neither could she let him go on with taking responsibility for everything.

„And though Lady Catherine is of , ah, a somewhat domineering nature ...“

„You need not continue, Miss Bennet, I am inclined to think that there are worse fates than being Anne de Bourgh as well. I do not think that I would have snatched her away form my aunt, had I given the matter more thought.“

Darcy stopped and turned to face Lizzy

„But the material point is, I hadn´t given the matter any thought! I visited and invited them out of a notion of familial duty but not because I took Anne´s or my aunt's feelings into consideration. You were quite right that evening when you said about my selfish disdain - “

Elizabeth interrupted him there.

„Mr Darcy, please stop. I cannot think of all the horrid things I said without shame. I was blinded be prejudices then.“

She was unable to look at him. In a gentle tone Darcy spoke

„Some of your accusations were based on false information but clearly my behaviour was at fault, both in Hertfordshire and in Kent. Not even you can talk me out of that.“

Elizabeth was silent. Darcy knew a lot of things to say on that subject but he felt that nothing could be gained now by dwelling on these past events. They walked on in silence, a companionable silence though which neither wanted to disturb. Darcy had offered his arm again and Lizzy could feel him to be less tense than before. She involuntarily shook her had - not so long ago she´d misread each and every one of his words and actions and now ... Upon Darcy´s enquiring look she gave him a very tender smile, one that couldn´t leave him in doubt.

Darcy covered her hand with his and drew a deep breath.

Chapter 13

Posted on Thursday, 25 September 2003

Darcy covered her hand with his and drew a deep breath.

Just then a pheasant flew up about a yard from them. Both were startled by the noise, Lizzy stepping closer and Darcy drew his arms around her. When Lizzy realized what it was she couldn`t contain her amusement. In between peals of laughter she managed to ask Mr Darcy

„Do you remember Miss Bingley's head dress at Pemberley?“

He did indeed and he remembered also what he had wanted to say then, in the library. Elizabeth realized their position and withdrew, albeit reluctantly. Darcy relinquished his hold in the same manner.

The moment was gone but each had again gained more confidence. As it was dark by then they turned back, arm in arm.

„I did understand that your parents and your youngest sister were not at home when I called with Bingley.“

„Yes, Lydia`s been with Colonel Foster`s wife in Brighton these past two months and my father took my mother there too, when I left.“

Seeing Darcy's frown on hearing the first part of her answer she enquired

„Is aught the matter, sir?“

„I am not quite sure. I have been wondering lately whether I haven't been wrong in not making Wickham's character generally known after, ah, after Ramsgate. So he is still able to carry himself off as a member of polite society and is left free to hurt other people.“

„I do not see what you could have done without possibly hurting Miss Darcy.“

„Colonel Fitzwilliam wanted to challenge him to a duel.“

„What a st - , ah, irresponsible idea!“

„That's what I told him, I may have used even stronger words than stupid.“

„I do not intend to belittle your cousin's military skills but just imagine if he'd been hurt or killed even - after all we cannot expect Wickham to adhere to the rules. Georgiana would never have recovered from such a blow.“

Elizabeth's use of his sister`s given name didn`t escape Darcy`s notice and it warmed his heart.

„After, ah, reading your letter I had wondered whether Wickham's character should be made known in Meryton - without saying anything about Miss Darcy of course - and I thought it a useless endeavor as the militia was to quit Hertfordshire soon. But you are right, I should have thought of other people being hurt.“

„It certainly is not your responsibility. I have asked Colonel Fitzwilliam to alert his superiors, to have a close look at his behaviour. I just don`t know whether that`s enough.“

„I should think it is. If you do more, Wickham might guess who`s behind it and possibly would take revenge.“

„I hope you are right. In any case, I am glad that your parents are in Brighton, too.“

„I have thought about Lydia but neither did I detect any particular attachment from her side nor is she rich enough to tempt a fortune hunter.“

Darcy refrained form telling her that Lydia might present enough temptation for a man like Wickham; it was too sordid a topic.

„I wonder how Bingley is fairing. I half expected to hear from him by now.“

„I haven`t heard from Jane either. Do you expect any particular news?“

„Do you?“

„I have always felt that, should fate throw them together again, everything would be resolved quickly.“ With a twinkle Lizzy continued

„And now it seems as if it wasn't fate at all but that you had a hand in it.“

„I only aimed to correct an error of mine.“

They had reached the inn by then and were standing in the parlour leading to their rooms. Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner could happen upon them any moment so this was not the time for lingering on. Darcy bowed over Lizzy's hand and bade her a gentle
„Good night, Miss Bennet.“
„Good night, Mr. Darcy.“

The following day of their travels was very much different from the previous. Though still unacknowledged, the lovers' happiness and contentedness was contagious. Furthermore a good night's sleep had somehow placated the Gardiner's anger. Mrs. Gardiner and Mr. Darcy were exchanging stories about Lambton, Mr. Gardiner found out, much to his delight, that Mr. Darcy shared his love of fishing and Lizzy and the latter discovered that their opinions on books were - contrary to earlier beliefs - not at all different.

When they were approaching London a feeling of apprehension settled over the party. Mr. Gardiner, prepared to judge Anne's behaviour not as severely as before, let Mr. Darcy understand that he'd forsake any claim to berate Anne as her employer under these circumstances.

Even Darcy's anger subsided when he realized that Elizabeth was treating the whole affair less seriously now. Now that she was sure that Darcy didn't hold Anne's flight against her, she'd begun to see the comical side of it. When talking a short stroll with Darcy during a change of horses she remarked

„I wouldn't be surprised if her stunt would inspire Anne to write a book.“

„I am glad that you do not hurt anymore because of her.“

„You must adopt one of my principles - think of the past only as it gives you pleasure.“

„I am afraid that is not in my nature but I will try very hard to follow your example.“

They reached Cheapside late in the afternoon and were greeted by an astonishing sight.

Chapter 14

Posted on Sunday, 28 September 2003

Mr. Bennet was playing chess with Miss de Bourgh in the drawing room. Anne looked like she'd been crying recently but still more content and healthy than anyone had seen her before.

She was visibly startled on beholding Elizabeth and even more so on Mr. Darcy. Mr. Bennet came forward.

„Dear brother and sister, forgive my intrusion into your household. Fanny needed rest and comfort that an inn couldn't have provided. Be not alarmed, she's much better now, so well actually that I sent Lydia shopping with her.“

„Think nothing of it, brother, you know you're welcome at our house any time.“

Nothing more was said. Anne stepped forward, chin high although her voice was trembling.

„Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner, Elizabeth, Fitzwilliam, I know I wronged you all. I do hope that one day you'll find it in your heart to forgive me.“

When no one answered Mr. Darcy stepped forward,

„I am very glad that you're safe, Anne. I think the most important thing to do now is to put your mother at ease.“

„An express has already been sent, at Miss de Bourgh's insistence, I might add.“

All eyes were on Mr. Bennet then so he proceeded.

„You may imagine my surprise when I found this young lady asleep in the library, with Fielding no less.“

Here Mr. Gardiner interrupted

„Each member of this household may use the library, Miss de Bourgh did nothing wrong in borrowing a book, though maybe there's been a misunderstanding about `use of the library´.“

„Well, as father to Lizzy - and also Mary recently - I am no stranger to such behaviour and as Miss de Bourgh rather looked the governess than the nanny I thought nothing of it. I am afraid I startled her however, prompting a most astonishing confession.“

Mr. Bennet shot an enquiring look at Anne who continued, eyes on the carpet.

„After the initial euphoria I have been unhappy with the situation I created - it was very selfish of me to run away. I have been truly happy with the children but now - due to their absence with time on my hands - couldn't avoid any longer facing the fact that I was betraying my employers and you, Elizabeth, and that my family would be frantic with worry. Such was my state of mind when Mr. Bennet happened upon me.“

At this point Mrs. Gardiner interrupted,

„Well, my dear, you surely misled us as to your identity and you gave us quite a fright when we discovered this but on the whole I have to own that you've been a wonderful nanny, the children will be very sorry to lose you.“

Anne, overcome with emotion, could only bow her head in thanks.

Darcy sensed that it was him Anne feared most at the moment. Her flight had brought him to Hertfordshire where the ground had been laid for the present good understanding between Elizabeth and him. As his beloved was obviously quite prepared to forgive Anne and his own mood was very near jubilant he asked gently,

„What would you like me to do, Anne?“

Anne was surprised. Not that she didn't know her cousin to be capable of generosity and kindness, but she could imagine what he'd had to bear from her mother since her flight and furthermore didn't think that she deserved such immediate forgiveness. When seeing the grateful smile Elizabeth bestowed on Darcy Anne understood.

As much as she would have liked support when facing Lady Catherine, she couldn't tear Fitzwilliam away just now.

„If you will be so kind as to lend me a carriage I will go home tomorrow.“

„Wouldn't you like me to go with you?“

„Yes, but I feel I should do this on my own. Mama no doubt has sent Richard and you all over the country already.“

„We would have looked for you without Lady Catherine's prompting as well. If you really want to go alone I support your decision and give you a carriage and a maid, but do know, if you change your mind I am ready to go with you.“

„Thank you, Fitzwilliam.“

Anne was near tears by now.

Mrs. Gardiner threw in,

„Miss de Bourgh, I want you to know that you're welcome to stay, there's no need to pack and move to your cousin's house just for one night.“

After an enquiring glance at Darcy who nodded Anne accepted gratefully. This would provide her with an opportunity to try to make peace with Elizabeth.

The women went upstairs - some to unpack, one to pack and the gentlemen retired to the library.

Mr. Bennet was curious as to what accounted for Darcy's presence and listened to his explanation with wonderment. He had seen the glow about Lizzy and the young man before him - though certainly not of a disposition to wear his heart on his sleeve - too radiated a quiet happiness. Mr. Bennet sighed, he was about to lose his favourite daughter.

Mr. Gardiner sensed that Mrs. Bennet's health was probably not all that was behind their presence in London but refrained from enquiring due to Mr. Darcy.

Darcy felt too that he should leave the brothers alone but two things compelled him to stay. Firstly, he wanted to see Elizabeth before leaving and possibly ask her for an interview tomorrow and secondly - he thought the Bennets leaving Brighton might somehow be connected to Wickham.

„Mr. Bennet, I will not stand in your way to discuss family matters but - does your presence in London have anything to do with George Wickham?“

Mr. Bennet looked up sharply, astounded.

„Why, yes! The scoundrel attempted to run off with Lydia. If his superiors had not already been watchful he might even have succeeded, for Lydia is very young and, er, exuberant. I had noticed her marked preference but as he didn't single her out and as she really is not an object for a fortune hunter I wasn't worried. Now it seems that marriage wasn't what he had had in mind at all!“

Mr. Bennet was truly angry.

„I am very sorry to hear this, sir, and owe you an apology. It is my fault that Wickham was still able to move in polite society. I knew of his dissolute ways but - out of mistaken pride - I didn't want to make his dealings with my family public and therefore didn't act on my knowledge. I am sorry.“

„You are taking too much upon yourself, I do not see what you could have done, Mr. Darcy. Besides, it seems that your cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, was the one to alert Colonel Foster. Without that we would indeed been in trouble. As it is now, no great harm is done, Lydia's reputation is still intact and if I'm not mistaken her vanity is more bruised than her heart.“

„I am glad to hear it. I hope, being young as she is, that she will recover shortly from her disappointment.“

„I'm positive about it, she may even come out a little wiser from the experience - I know I did.“

Note: Darcy quotes a Shakespeare sonnet.(I will not tell you yet which one and what quote as that would spoil the surprise).

Chapter 15

Posted on Wednesday, 1 October 2003,

A commotion was heard outside; Mrs. Bennet and Lydia were back from their shopping trip. The men ventured into the drawing room but Mrs. Bennet, having heard of her sister`s return had already followed the lady upstairs to tell her of her dashed hopes for a husband for Lydia. Mr. Bennet went upstairs too to apprise Lizzy of what had happened in Brighton.

When Mr. Gardiner was called away by a clerk this left Lydia alone with Mr. Darcy. Mr. Darcy, having never spent another thought on Lydia Bennet was still prepared to be amicable. Mr. Bennet's tale had reminded him of how very young the girl was. After some small talk about the sights of Brighton, Lydia lapsed into an uncharacteristic silence. Darcy knew he should take his leave but still lingered on, hoping to see Elizabeth before going to his townhouse. He only realized that Lydia had been studying him for some time when she burst forth.

„I reckon you're after all not half as horrid as Wickham told everyone you are.“

Darcy had to smile in spite of himself.

„I should hope not, Miss Lydia.“

Elizabeth was standing in the doorway, mortified. Darcy gave her a reassuring smile and Lydia flung herself at her.

„Lizzy! I'm quite happy to see you! Oh, I`ve got something for your from Brighton, I'll go and fetch it!“

Darcy, striving to ease Elizabeth`s embarrassment, remarked

„I dare say she'll get over her disappointment soon. Thankfully, no real harm was done.“

„Yes, thank God. If you had not prompted Colonel Fitzwilliam - I don't want to think of the possible outcome.“

„I only did what I should have done long ago. Let us think no more of it.“

Silence settled upon them and when voices were heard on the staircase Darcy knew he had to act quickly,

„Miss Bennet, would you grant me permission to talk to you tomorrow? Somewhere without pheasants, dead or alive?“

Elizabeth blushed and smiled.

„I would be very happy. I think the park nearby hosts no wildlife bigger than sparrows.“

„Tigers could not detain me.“

Mrs. Bennet had entered during his last sentence and was looking quite puzzled. Mrs. Gardiner earnestly entreated Darcy to stay for dinner but his need of appraising Colonel Fitzwilliam of the end of the search for Anne prevented his attending, much to his disappointment. He promised to call in the morning however.

Dinner was a noisy affair this evening, even if Lydia and Mrs. Bennet knew nothing of who the Gardiner's nanny was. Anne had taken her dinner with the other servants but managed to ask Lizzy whether they could talk later. So Lizzy went upstairs and led Anne to her room. Anne apologized profusely but also thanked Elizabeth for her friendship and correspondence. Lizzy assured her of her baring her no ill will and wished her courage for her return to Rosings. Though apprehensive of her mother's reaction, Anne at least gave the appearance of being brave enough to face it.

Elizabeth had forgiven Anne wholeheartedly - her flight had brought Darcy to Hertfordshire, hadn't it? And this was not the time to blame Anne for being somewhat sly. Just how sly she was, was revealed by her parting remark

„Maybe one day not far off you will be grateful for my stunt as it will focus my mother's attention on me rather than, say, her nephews.“

Elizabeth blushed and was sorely tempted to throw a pillow after Anne. She went down again to bid her father good night.

„You needn't say anything, my child. I will stay at home if your young man means to call on me.

As Elizabeth attempted to speak Mr. Bennet waved her off

„I give you leave to like him, he seems to be a very decent fellow. If only Derbyshire wasn't so far off.“

Lizzy hugged her father and went to bed.

She awoke at dawn, a smile on her face even before her first conscious breath. The weather proved to be in their favour, no cloud threatened their walk.

Lizzy was down before anyone else save Mr. Gardiner who had already left for his warehouse. It appeared that Darcy was an early riser, too. To own the truth he hadn't been able to sleep at all. Elizabeth pondered whether it would be too forward to greet him outside. Just then Mr. Bennet was coming down

„Out for a walk before breakfast, are you Lizzy? Well, off with you then.“

Lizzy stepped outside as Darcy was coming up the front stairs. He looked at her with a small smile, questioningly.

„Good morning, Miss Bennet. You mentioned a park yesterday?”

„Good morning , Mr. Darcy, indeed I did. Do you care for a walk?”

„I could think of nothing better at the moment.“

Darcy offered his arm and they set off, leaving a sad Mr. Bennet watching them from the library window.

The park wasn't populated at this hour and Lizzy - though full of joyous anticipation - felt all the awkwardness of their situation.

Darcy stopped and turned to face her. His carefully prepared speech was forgotten. Elizabeth sensed his nervousness and tried to reassure him with an earnest look.

„Miss Bennet, Elizabeth, will you do me the great honour and consent to be my wife?“

„I will, yes, I will.“

Heartfelt delight spread over his features and Elizabeth didn't know where to look and what to say further, conscious only of feeling her hand over his heart where he had drawn it. Seeing his smile, thoughts of those lips and strawberries came to her mind unbidden. She blushed deep red.

Darcy, unsure what to make of this, covered her cheek and gently drew her chin up to make her face him. What he saw in her eyes made him giddy with happiness and as Elizabeth heard him murmur „For more red than coral...“ she knew that his thoughts were similar to her own.

Her small content sigh was all the permission Darcy needed to lean down for their first kiss.

Epilogue

Mr. Bennet's consent was granted and between him and Mrs. Gardiner they managed to keep Mrs. Bennet's raptures at a nearly unembarrassing level. A letter from Jane arrived during breakfast. A double wedding - Mrs. Bennet was beside herself with bliss.

The grand event passed without surprises save one - Lady Catherine de Bourgh and Anne were in attendance. The lady still fussed a lot over her daughter but there was a marked change in their interactions.

Colonel Fitzwilliam found out eventually about Fernando but not why his usually somber cousin kept muttering `sort of knight´, thus prompting laughing fits in his wife, Elizabeth.

Anne wrote some highly successful romance novels and Charlotte Collins insisted on once having caught Lady Catherine secretly reading them.

The staff at Pemberley got used to their master and mistress always taking a bowl of strawberries upstairs after dinner whenever strawberries were in season.

The End

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