Newborn

Parker Rowe has hated vampires with a passion ever since his
family was murdered by a gang of malicious vampires, and he has

been trying to hunt down the culprits for years.

A promising clue leads him into a small, secluded town where he

meets Josh Summers. Sweet and innocent, Josh is as much out of
place in Parker’s world of revenge and violence as he is in his own

narrow-minded community, but he can give Parker the peace of
mind he craves. When the vampires Parker is chasing use Josh to

deliver a very special message, Parker finds himself facing the
ultimate dilemma. If what he loves and what he hates the most
become the same, which emotion will win?

While Parker struggles to accept the changes his lover goes
through, he comes closer than ever to detecting the truth about

his family’s deaths—but then his own life takes a dramatic turn…

Genre: Alternative (M/M or F/F), Older H/h, Vampires/Werewolves
Length: 53,492 words

NEWBORN

Sage Marlowe

EROTIC ROMANCE

MANLOVE

Siren Publishing, Inc.

www.SirenPublishing.com

 

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NEWBORN
Copyright © 2012 by Sage Marlowe
E-book ISBN: 978-1-62241-902-9

First E-book Publication: November 2012

Cover design by Christine Kirchoff
All cover art and logo copyright © 2012 by Siren Publishing, Inc.

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PUBLISHER
Siren Publishing, Inc.
www.SirenPublishing.com

 

Letter to Readers

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DEDICATION

To my Muse…

 

 

NEWBORN

SAGE MARLOWE

Copyright © 2012

Prologue

Parker froze midmotion, listening. He felt the familiar cold clasp

of fear claw up his spine and settle in that spot right at the base of his
skull, but he ignored it. So what. He’d grown used to it. Fear didn’t
frighten him anymore because fear couldn’t hurt him. They, however,
could hurt him.

Tilting his head, he willed his feeble senses to provide him with

more information. Information that might be vital for his survival, but,
little surprisingly, his senses failed him. He could hear nothing, see
nothing, and fuck, smell nothing.

Well, of course that wasn’t true. He could hear the soft, almost

melodic rushing noise and the faint thuds of the falling rain. He could
see it as silvery threads, reflected by the dim light of the singular
street lantern at the end of the road. He could even smell it in the air
around him, the moisture it brought, and the damp earth it stirred.
Rain. Water. One of the major sources of life but entirely meaningless
to him. Just like life itself had lost its meaning.

There. A movement to his right. A slight disturbance of the air,

gone as fast as a shadow and just as impossible to catch.

Well, nearly as impossible to catch, Parker thought grimly as he

tightened his grip around the gun he was holding. The secret was
knowing how to do it—and having the right equipment. Turning

Newborn 9

 

slowly around his own axis, he stared into the ghostly darkness that
surrounded him. He knew he was at a mighty disadvantage here, but
he didn’t exactly have a reputation for his clearheaded approach to
pursuing his goal. His quarry. Some might say it was what made him
so good at what he did. Some certainly said it was what was going to
get him killed. Parker didn’t care about either of them. He didn’t care
about anyone or anything apart from what was needed to bring him
closer to his enemies.

He never even heard his attacker approach. With the sudden,

unforeseeable power of a lightning strike, Parker was grabbed, lifted
up, and whirled through the air before he hit the ground with a nasty
thud. That would have been his skull breaking, he mused with an
eerie detachedness, even as bright pain exploded in his brain and
nausea threatened to overwhelm him.

He ignored both. Like fear, pain was something he’d learned to

ignore. It only told him he was still alive. Which he wouldn’t be much
longer if he didn’t get a grip on himself and start fighting back.

Except, there was nothing to fight. He raised his head gingerly to

look around and take stock. A moan slipped out of his mouth before
he could stop it. Fuck, but his head did hurt. So much it affected his
vision, so maybe the damage was worse than he’d thought. Blinking
furiously, he tried to make his eyes focus, but the world around him
remained blurry.

This time he stifled the sound that wanted out, a little sigh. If it

was still around, then tonight might well be the end of it—the end of
Parker, to be precise. Shivering from a sudden gush of cold air, Parker
reached into his pocket and curled his fingers around the familiar,
smooth round shape. The metal had warmed from the heat his body
was radiating. It felt quite nice now, actually. Comforting, friendly,
and nothing like the deadly tool it was.

“Take your hand out of your pocket,” a voice ordered right behind

Parker’s left ear. “Slowly, and be sure to leave whatever’s inside it
where it is.”

10

Sage Marlowe

 

Parker let out a sarcastic chuckle. “Now why would I do that?” he

asked, clenching his fingers around the bulbous piece of metal. If he
was to part with it, it would have to rip his arm off.

“If that’s what you want.” The voice was void of emotion, and

Parker knew it had figured out exactly what his plan was and found a
way to keep him from putting it into effect. Which meant he’d failed,
so maybe whatever was about to happen served him right.

The creature behind him laughed softly. “Yeah, right. You’re

quite the hero, aren’t you?” It must have leaned in, because the voice
was closer now, and Parker could feel the air the thing expelled with
its words stir the hairs at the nape of his neck.

“But let me tell you, Parker—tonight isn’t the end of it. At least

not the way you think it will be. No, for you, tonight is the
beginning.”

Newborn 11

 

Chapter 1

Three years earlier

Parker was following the narrow, winding road with increasing

annoyance. The further he went, the less promising it looked. In a
peculiar, twisted way, that was exactly what kept the tiny spark of
hope inside him gleaming. After years of searching the country’s
towns and cities, he was beginning to wonder if maybe he had been
looking in the wrong place after all.

It had always seemed obvious to him that they would prefer the

noise and crowdedness of bigger towns, where it was easier to blend
in and disappear in a sea of nameless faces. Out here, where life
seemed to be peaceful, they would get noticed and risk exposure. But
only if they crossed the paths of any of the villagers, of course. And
let the villagers live to tell the tale.

A shudder clawed its way up his neck and right under his hairline

to somewhere at the back of his head. It was a well-known feeling,
one he had long since come to associate with thoughts of them. They.
Vampires. Creatures of the night. Evil. Merciless. And doomed to be
annihilated if they happened to cross his path. A few of them had
already met their creator through his hands, but the ones he really
wanted to see annihilated had managed to escape him. Until now.
This time, he was fairly positive that he was on the right track. It
certainly looked promising. Well, maybe not the track itself, but the
traces and the rumours he’d heard that had led him to this lonely,
quiet corner of the world.

12

Sage Marlowe

 

Parker suppressed another shudder, remembering some of the

scenes he had seen. Some of the awful things these creatures were
capable of doing to their victims. Drinking their blood was clearly not
enough. Well, maybe for some of them, but others, like the ones he’d
been chasing for so long, seemed to prefer the thrill of the kill. After
playing with their victims.

Parker pushed those memories back into the box he kept in a quiet

corner of his mind where they had come from. He usually did his best
to keep the lid tightly locked on them, but sometimes they sneaked
out. Not tonight though. He didn’t want them out, couldn’t take the
risk of them scattering his thoughts in all directions like frightened
cattle. No, he needed his senses alert, his wit sharp and his mind
working.

Tonight would be his first attempt to track them down. There was

no point in wasting time, even though he wasn’t one hundred percent
sure where to start looking for them. Maybe a little chat with the
owner of the place he was going to be staying at would give him some
valuable clues. The locals often knew more than they realised or were
comfortable admitting to, but he had found that they were only too
happy to gossip with a visitor, and sometimes he managed to coax the
most interesting information from them.

He had reached his destination at last. The Lakeview Hotel was

just the type of small but well-kept place its website had claimed it
was, and admittedly, the view on the lake that it had taken its name
from was even more spectacular than what was captured in the
photographs. The business was run in the fourth generation by the
Summerses, a local family.

Chuckling, Parker switched off the engine and opened the door.

Quite astonishing, really, how many of the details had got stuck in his
mind. Or maybe it was just the name. Summers. It was a nice name.
So positive, carefree, and full of life, blissfully ignorant of all the evil
and darkness in the world. It was a long time since Parker had felt
anything even remotely like summer in the cold, shrivelled-up lump

Newborn 13

 

his heart had become. Winter, maybe, he thought grimly as he
plucked his bags from the boot and slammed the lid shut.

Turning around, he swayed under their weight. Or maybe he

swayed from the sight, but he preferred to blame it on the heavy mass
of his equipment. No matter if he was the cause for the sudden
weakness in Parker’s knees or not, the man standing in front of him
was beautiful enough to make Parker’s groin tighten in unreasonable
anticipation.

No, not man, Parker corrected himself. Boy. The kid could hardly

be older than sixteen, seventeen, maybe, but even if he was legal, he
was still too young for what Parker would love to do with him given
the chance. And still, he couldn’t seem to take his eyes off him.

All long-limbed, gangly adolescent, the boy had the face of an

angel with the most amazing dark-brown eyes that seemed to draw
Parker’s gaze to them no matter how hard he tried to resist. Peeking
up at him from underneath a few silky strands of unruly hair, they
seemed to stare right into his core. Worried about what the boy might
detect if he indeed caught a glimpse of the abyss that was his soul,
Parker looked away. It must have been a long time since he had been
the first to avert his gaze.

“Hi there,” the teenager greeted cheerfully. “Let me give you a

hand with that. You must be the new arrival, right? Mr, um, Parker, is
it?” His voice was tinged with a hint of the local accent, although he
was clearly making an effort to keep it to a minimum. Ah, kids. They
were all the same, weren’t they? Always trying to pretend they were
someone they were not.

Parker returned the smile. “Almost. Parker is my first name—”
“Oh, gosh. I’m so sorry!” the boy exclaimed and actually clapped

a hand in front of his mouth. It was the cutest and quite probably
queerest gesture Parker had seen in a long time. His smile turned into
a smirk. Some just couldn’t hide it. The local girls must be
inconsolable. They probably didn’t have much to choose from,
anyway, and losing what was a very promising piece of male meat to

14

Sage Marlowe

 

the other side must be annoying. Well, their loss might become his
gain. If he played his cards right, the kid could provide a nice
distraction during his stay. Maybe not to the extent Parker would have
liked him to be, but hey, a bit of flirting wouldn’t hurt, would it? And
maybe even a sample of those luscious lips, just to give something
more substantial to the fantasies he was planning to keep his mind
busy with in the evenings.

“No worries,” he replied indulgently. “I get that a lot.” Yeah, and

usually it irked the hell out of him. But bearing a grudge with those
tender chocolate eyes and sinful mouth would have been impossible,
even if he’d wanted to. “Mind telling me your name?”

The rosy tinge in the boy’s cheeks deepened. “Oh, yes, sure, um,

I’m Josh. Josh Summers.”

“Ah, so you’re the owners’ son, aren’t you?”
“Yes.” The struggle for composure was showing on Josh’s face,

but his voice was admiringly steady as he reached for Parker’s bags
and said, “I’ll take these.”

“No, you won’t!” Habit made Parker’s words sharper than he’d

intended them to be, and Josh promptly flinched, pulling his hand
back in obvious embarrassment.

“I’m sorry, um, I just wanted to help,” he mumbled, all shy,

scolded teenager once again. It was endearing.

“I am sorry,” Parker made himself say. “You see, I, uh, have a

few, um, fragile items in these bags, and I just prefer handling them
myself, but thank you for the offer. If you could perhaps just take me
to check in, and maybe show me to my room, that would be great.”
Why on earth had he added that last bit? Sure, it was exactly the line
he would have said to any potential pickup, but this was a boy, for
fuck’s sake. Regardless of how cute and desirable he was, and no
matter how much Parker had neglected his libido in the past weeks,
the kid was out of bounds.

Newborn 15

 

Ignorant of the silent turmoil he stirred inside Parker’s head and

groin, Josh sent him a smile that indeed deserved to be compared to
summer, and turned to lead the way.

“Sure, reception is right through here. You’re quite lucky. Mum

wants to give you the big room with the balcony. The view from there
is truly terrific,” he babbled merrily, and Parker felt almost sorry for
brushing the poor thing off.

“I don’t need a balcony. I’m not here for the view.”
“Oh, but you’re staying so long. Surely you’ll appreciate sitting

outside in the evenings with a glass of wine or something. With the
weather like this, it will be quite warm and cosy even at night.”

Yeah, I’m sure it will be. Too bad that I’d much prefer being

warm and cosy at night with you to sitting on a balcony with a glass
of wine. Parker pushed the thought away. Not gonna happen, mate.

“Well, I really don’t mind your mother giving the room to a guest

who is more appreciative of it,” he said evasively, relieved that they
had arrived at the front door. Looking just a little bewildered but not
offended, Josh held it open for him and called out, “Mum, the new
guest has arrived. Are you coming, or do you want me to check him
in?”

“Coming already!” she answered cheerfully from somewhere in

the building. Seconds later, a brunette came bustling down the
hallway. It was easy to spot where Josh had his good looks and
striking eyes from. She was gorgeous. She must have been
somewhere in her forties, with long, wavy auburn hair, pale, freckled
skin, and huge brown eyes, and she was quite simply one of the most
beautiful women Parker had ever seen.

“Hello there!” She beamed a welcoming smile at Parker and

slipped behind the reception desk. “Well then, let’s get the official
part over with so you can start enjoying your holiday. Did you have a
good trip?”

“Yes, um, thank you.” Just why did they all seem to believe he

was there for a holiday?

16

Sage Marlowe

 

“Josh, love, could you be a darling and fetch me the laundry

baskets?” she said absently while quickly tapping a few keys on the
keyboard in front of her.

“Sure,” Josh answered in well-mannered obedience and shuffled

off in the direction his mother had just come from. Parker didn’t miss
the quick glance Josh cast him over his shoulder, but he wasn’t quite
sure if what he read in those deep, dark-brown eyes was really what
he thought it was. Regret. Longing.

His stay might turn out to be very interesting indeed, Parker

mused, then he said, “It’s a nice place you have here, Mrs. Summers.
I bet you get a lot of guests who come here just to take a little time out
from hectic city life.”

Smiling, she shrugged and handed him a form. She tapped the

dotted line at its bottom with her pen then held that out to Parker, too.
“Most of our guests come here for recreational purposes. We’re not
exactly a hotel for business people, and the whole village is not a
place to attract that kind of clientele either. We get the odd travelling
salesman who is just too tired to make it to his next destination, but
that’s about it. The others are here for hiking, fishing, and similar
activities. Oh, and horse riding, of course. We own a couple. If you
like, Josh can take you on a trip around the area one of these days.”

“Thank you.” Handing her back the signed form, Parker smiled

apologetically. “I’m not much of a horseman, I’m afraid.” Which
doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t like to take your son for a ride, but one
that wouldn’t involve any horses.

Out loud, he said, “I would love to go fishing, though. I haven’t

done that in ages, but I remember enjoying it a lot when I was a kid,
and my…grandpa used to take me.”

If she had noticed his brief pause, she wasn’t letting on. Her

hospitable smile was still firmly in place. “Oh, no problem. We have
some equipment you can borrow if you like, and Josh can point you to
a place where you stand a chance of actually catching something.”

Newborn 17

 

“That’s very kind of you. Thank you. I’d love to take you up on

the equipment borrowing offer, but are you sure your son won’t mind
playing the tourist guide?”

She waved his question off with a casual flick of her slim hand.

“Not at all. In fact, he’ll probably be only too happy for the company.
There isn’t much the poor thing can do around here when he comes
home during the summer.”

“Oh, so he doesn’t live with you anymore?” Parker asked

casually. Not that it was of any real importance, but somehow he was
curious to learn more about the cute kid.

“No. Well, he does during the summer months and holidays, but

he went to a boarding school for a couple of years, and now he’s in
university. There just isn’t much this area can offer a bright young
man like him education-wise,” she added glumly.

“What’s he studying?”
“Business management and tourism.” There was a definite note of

pride in her voice as she said, “He’s going to take over this place
when he has graduated, you know.”

Surprised, Parker looked at her more closely. “Really? Excuse me

if I’m a little out of line, but aren’t you far too young to retire?”

She giggled girlishly and flicked her hand again. “Thank you,

sweetie. You’d be surprised if you knew my age, but we’re not going
to retire just yet. The plan is for Josh to use the qualifications he’ll
acquire to turn this into one of those huge resort-and-spa places.
We’ve been having people telling us for years how much of a waste it
is not to make more of this location.”

“I see. Well, I’m sure your plan is going to be successful. Josh

looks like he’s going to be a capable manager one day.” Not to
mention that he’d look gorgeous in a suit.

“Oh, he will. He already does all our marketing. You’ve booked

via our website, haven’t you? Josh set that up. Apparently you have to
be online these days to rent rooms.” She grinned. “Ah, well. At least
that keeps him busy so he doesn’t have time to fall in with the wrong

18

Sage Marlowe

 

crowd or do stupid things at uni.” Her so far cheerful expression
darkened a little.

“Anything wrong?” Parker asked impulsively. It was none of his

business, really, but she was a nice person, so yes, he found himself
taking an interest.

“No.” She sighed and took a quick glance around. “No, it’s

just…Josh has been spending time with some, um, friends, I guess I
should call them.”

“So? There’s nothing wrong when a kid spends his time with

others, is there?”

“Of course not. Not as such. But…” She trailed off and shifted her

weight uncomfortably. “I’m probably just being an overprotective
mother hen, but, well, he’s hardly a kid anymore, and I think that
there may be…um, something more going on there, if you know what
I mean,” she added with a conspiratorial wink and an almost crimson
blush on her pretty face. So that was it. Mummy Summers was having
suspicions about her son’s sexual orientation while he was probably
only too happy to be living it up away from the restrictions family and
a tiny village presented him with.

“Would that be a problem?” Parker asked almost automatically.

He was far from stepping in on the kid’s behalf, but he remembered
what it had been like to find out he was gay. Coming to terms with
that was hard enough without the added complications of homophobic
parents.

She stared at the wall, taking a moment to give an answer. “I love

my son, and I always will, but it’s not what I’d want for him. That
kind of lifestyle doesn’t belong here.”

“I see. Well, thanks for a nice chat. If you could tell me where my

room is, please, I’d love to unpack and get settled.”

Her smile was back in place already. “Oh, silly old chatterbox that

I am. Of course., You must be tired, poor thing. It’s room three-
twenty. That’s on the third floor. Do you want me to call Josh to help
you with the bags?”

Newborn 19

 

“No, thank you. He already offered to take them, but I’d rather

handle them myself,” Parker explained over his shoulder as he walked
to the staircase. Her comment had made him angrier than it should
have, and it confused him, because he didn’t know if he was angry
because of the remote discrimination in it, or because it was Josh who
was being discriminated against. Or maybe the reason for his
confusion was something else. The fact that Josh had been playing
with other boys, perhaps. Either way, exploring those thoughts any
further was something Parker just didn’t have the energy for. He had
more important—and far more dangerous—villains to pursue than a
mother who wasn’t pleased with her son’s sexuality.

* * * *

Parker rang the doorbell for about the hundredth time. “Fuck,” he

muttered under his breath once again, mentally preparing himself to
spend the rest of the night in his car. The prospect was far from
appealing, especially since he had been driving around almost the
entire day in it, acquainting himself with the area and searching for
more traces of his quarry. He hadn’t meant to let it get quite so late,
but there had been that one place he’d gone to check out before he
had realised how far it was away from the hotel.

“Yeah?” The door was opened at last, and a very bleary-eyed,

drowsy-looking Josh peered up at him.

“Hi. I’m really sorry to wake you up,” Parker said. “I seem to

have forgotten my keys.” He smiled apologetically.

“Oh, okay.” A wide yawn interrupted Josh. He tried to stifle it but

failed miserably and quickly hid it behind his hand.

“Sorry. Uh, come in.” He held the door open to let Parker pass

and then locked it behind him. “Have you been waiting long?”

“No, just a few minutes. I’m sorry. I woke you up, didn’t I?”
Josh sighed sleepily and suppressed another yawn as he shuffled

to the registration desk. “S’okay. We don’t usually keep reception

20

Sage Marlowe

 

covered at night unless we know someone’s still out or hasn’t checked
in yet. I thought everyone was in, so I went to bed. Ah, drat, I guess I
should’ve checked. Mum would have a fit if she knew. Tonight it’s
just me house-sitting, you see, ’cause my parents are staying with
Granny. Here’s your key. Room three-twenty, right?”

“Yes, thank you. Once again, I’m sorry,” Parker said. “Just one

more question, then I’ll let you get back to sleep. Is there any place
where I can still get something to eat at this hour?”

Josh raised his eyebrows. “At one in the morning?” He sneered.

“You do know where you are, right? We’re famous for our
picturesque landscape, not for our busy nightlife. The nearest place
where you’ll get food is at least a half-hour drive away.”

Parker sighed. “I’ll just have to face that, then. I’m starved and

haven’t eaten since lunch.”

Looking at Parker indecisively, Josh ran his hand through his hair.

“Well, if you don’t want anything fancy, I guess I could whip you up
something.”

Parker shook his head, touched by the offer. “That’s very kind of

you, but I couldn’t…” he started, but Josh interrupted him with a
wave of his hand.

“It’s okay. Really. I don’t mind. Come through to the kitchen and

I’ll see what we’ve got.”

Not waiting for Parker’s answer, he led the way to the large,

practical kitchen and opened the fridge. He cast a critical glance
inside then half turned to Parker. “Eggs and baked beans on toast,” he
offered. “Would that do?”

Parker nodded gratefully. “Sure. Anything that’s edible will do.”
“Sit down.” Josh indicated a chair with his head and took a couple

of eggs, milk, and a large chunk of cheese from the fridge, and then,
rummaging through the cupboards, he came up with bread, a tin of
beans, and a large frying pan.

Watching him prepare the food, Parker seized the chance to eye

him up some more. Josh must have dressed in a hurry. He was

Newborn 21

 

wearing a pair of jeans that were so faded they had become threadbare
in places. His shirt was buttoned up wrong, revealing a patch of
delicious, silky-smooth skin just below his neckline. A light stubble
peppered his jaw and chin, a curious reminder that this still
somewhat-boyish body was already far down the road of becoming a
man. Again, Parker felt a curious attraction to him. Again, he
reminded himself that Josh was not his type. Too cute, too young, and
too fragile. But something about this slender, youthful body and the
natural grace with which Josh moved made his groin tingle. Parker
swallowed. Josh’s hair was tousled and the pillow had left a pattern of
creases on his right cheek. He looked quite simply so warm and
welcoming that Parker wanted to just wrap his arms around him and
cuddle him, which was frightening in itself. Parker never cuddled.

“Coffee, tea, or, um, milk?” Josh’s soft voice broke into his

thoughts.

“Coffee would be great,” Parker said, grateful for the distraction,

and grinned. “Milk?”

Josh nodded and shrugged, seeming just a little embarrassed. “I

like it. And warm milk’s good if you can’t sleep.” Warm milk. No,
seriously, just how cute could one guy be? Parker sighed and shook
his head at himself. Definitely too young.

“How do you take it?”
“Huh?”
“How do you take it?” Josh repeated, and, interpreting Parker’s

blank expression, added, “Your coffee. Milk, sugar, sweetener?”

“Oh, yes. The coffee, of course.” Parker smiled a little goofily as

he looked at Josh’s innocent face. He had obviously been the only one
who’d registered the double entendre. “Black, please.”

“Coming right up.” Josh fumbled with a big, shiny, complicated-

looking machine for a few moments before holding out a mug to
Parker.

“Okay, here you go.”

22

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Parker gladly accepted the cup that instantly filled his nose with

the delicious scent of steaming-hot, strong coffee.

“Thank you.” Gripping the mug tightly, he cradled it in his hands.

It felt good. Something warm to cling to. Something to chase away
the cold that thinking of them invariably left in his bones. Not as
efficient as the heat of a living human body to press up against and
sink into, but it would have to do.

“It’s really kind of you to do this. I appreciate it.”
Josh looked up from whipping eggs to give him a quick smile.

The gentleness in those brown eyes touched something deep inside
Parker, and the cold eased off a bit.

“No problem.” The hint of a frown creased Josh’s smooth

forehead as he worked in silent concentration. Minutes later, he put a
plate in front of Parker, who was quite pleasantly surprised.

“This is fantastic,” he said, spearing a piece of fluffy yellow egg.

“You cook often?”

“Well, uh, just a few simple meals.” Josh grinned. “I have to

survive somehow at university, and I’m not a big fan of frozen pizza
and the likes.”

“Not?” Parker looked up from his beans. “I thought your entire

generation lived on that stuff.”

“My generation?” Josh laughed. “Oh come on, you make it sound

like you’re my grandpa.”

“Well, I am quite a bit older,” Parker pointed out and bit into a

piece of warm, buttery toast. He could definitely get used to Josh’s
idea of simple cooking, he decided.

Josh’s eyes narrowed sceptically. “Only a few years, I should

think,” he observed thoughtfully.

“Don’t flatter me, kid,” Parker said good-humouredly. “How old

are you, anyway?”

“I turned twenty in June.”
“See, I’m thirty-two. That’s quite a bit older.”

Newborn 23

 

“Only twelve years.” Unasked, Josh picked up Parker’s cup and

took it to the coffee machine for a refill. “Not even a whole
generation,” he added.

Twelve years. Not a whole generation. Twelve years that felt like

a lifetime. Parker sighed. “No, that’s true. Still, I’m too old to…” He
broke off and put a spoonful of beans into his mouth instead. Too old
to what, exactly? Too old to rip the clothes off Josh? To fantasise
about exploring the body that lay underneath? To find a few moments
of sweet oblivion in Josh’s arms? Or to simply bend him over that
kitchen counter—no, even better—make him sit on it and lie back on
it, so he could watch that beautiful face scrunch up in pleasure and see
those soft brown eyes roll back in ecstasy while he pounded that hot,
tight arse. He’d love to feel Josh’s lean-muscled legs wrapped around
his hips, crushing him in the desperate attempt to pull him in deeper…

Feeling nervous all of a sudden, Parker swallowed tightly and

wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He hadn’t started
drooling, had he? Staring at him expectantly, a somewhat dazed
expression on his face, Josh obviously waited for him to finish his
sentence.

“I’m just getting old,” Parker said lamely.
“I don’t think you’re old,” Josh commented softly as he put

Parker’s cup back in front of him. “Besides, you look younger.” A
pretty blush crept into his cheeks, and he quickly averted his gaze.
Interesting.

“Well, age doesn’t necessarily show in a person’s looks,” Parker

said and shoved the last piece of toast into his mouth.

“Now that was a really old thing to say.” Josh grinned and added

in a teasing tone, “Or should I say mature?”

Frowning, Parker got up and carried his plate to where Josh was

busily cleaning the frying pan and the worktop.

“You’re being a bit cheeky, kid, aren’t you?”
The colour in Josh’s cheeks promptly intensified. “Sorry, I didn’t

mean to—”

24

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“Shh, it’s okay. Where can I put this?”
“Uh, I’ll take it.”
Oh, I wish we weren’t just talking about tableware, Parker mused.
Josh held out his hand, and Parker gave him the dirty plate and

mug, the brush of fingertips as he did so fully intentional. Used to
reading an opponent’s body language, he didn’t fail to notice the little
twitch Josh gave at the contact, and he didn’t miss how his pupils
dilated just the tiniest bit either.

“Want a hand with any of that?” he offered. He stood close to

Josh. Closer than strictly appropriate, and Josh must have noticed it,
too. The poor thing was getting visibly nervous.

“Nn-nn.” Josh shook his head and licked his bottom lip, showing

the tip of a glossy-pink tongue for a moment. The quick, unaware
motion was too much for Parker’s self-control. He wanted Josh.
Wanted to rip his clothes off, wanted to taste that plump, quivering
bottom lip, wanted to explore every inch of his silky skin and fuck
him stupid afterwards. And unless he was very much mistaken, there
was interest on Josh’s side, too.

“So tell me, what else is there to do here if one can’t go to sleep?”

Parker asked in a low voice.

“Huh?”
“Well, you said warm milk would help you go to sleep. What

options are there for someone who doesn’t like milk and just had two
cups of delicious coffee?”

Josh wiped the worktop yet again, even though he had just

cleaned up everything meticulously. “I, um, don’t know. Not much,
really, I’m afraid. I suppose you could always watch TV or read a
book,” he suggested.

“Hm. What about more…physical activities?”
“Physical?” Josh asked, sounding charmingly uncertain.
“Uh-huh. I find that I sleep much better after a certain amount

of…exercise.”

Newborn 25

 

Josh held Parker’s gaze for a moment before he looked away.

“I’m not sure there’s much you can do at this time of night.”

“There’s always one thing,” Parker said softly and reached out to

take the towel from Josh’s clenched hand, stroking the back of his fist
with his fingertips. Josh flinched but let it happen and stared at their
hands like a startled deer.

“W–what’s that?” he asked after a moment.
“Can’t you guess by now?”
“I, um, I–I’m n–not sure,” Josh stammered.
Parker leaned in close enough to stir the short hairs behind Josh’s

ear with his breath as he spoke. “I want to fuck you, Josh. You do
know that, right?” He raised his hand, cupped Josh’s cheek, and tilted
his face up so he could look into those soft chocolate eyes. “So what
do you think?” His free hand landed on Josh’s hip, just an inch or so
from the tempting curves of his buttocks. Josh made a soft, helpless
sound somewhere between a nervous laugh and a moan. He pulled his
head back a little at the same time as he flexed his hips to push into
Parker’s touch.

“Shh,” Parker soothed. “I’m not going to hurt you.” Placing his

thumb under Josh’s chin, he held his head in place. Parker let his gaze
wander from the lovely brown eyes to the full, moist lips that were
parted just a little, so invitingly. Lowering his head, he brushed a first
gentle, tentative kiss on Josh’s startled mouth. When Josh didn’t
exactly respond but didn’t pull back, either, Parker took it as the
permission to go further. He found Josh in a second, more intense
kiss. This time, he didn’t settle for just a brush of lips. He caressed
Josh’s bottom lip with his tongue before he licked that little cleft at
the corner of his mouth then, at last, dipped into the sweet, velvety
opening. Josh tasted nice. Minty, clean, and so excitingly new. Fresh
and pure, and nothing like the shady figures Parker normally did this
kind of activity with.

Parker explored the inside of Josh’s mouth and trailed his tongue

along the sharp ridges of teeth to where Josh’s tongue waited to be

26

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awoken from its slumber. Josh responded at last. His kiss was still
reluctant but all the sweeter for its shyness. Parker groaned into their
kiss. This was good, but it wasn’t enough. Leaning back a little, he
nibbled Josh’s lips briefly then started a trail of tiny kisses along
Josh’s jaw to his neck. Josh shuddered delicately, and Parker felt
goose bumps rise under his touch. He gripped Josh’s earlobe with his
teeth and bit down gently, drawing a choked moan from Josh. The
sound was lost in the silence of the kitchen, but, at last, Josh leaned
into Parker’s hold. Parker kissed a line down Josh’s neck to his
collarbone, as always a little disconcerted when he felt the pulse
under his lips. This one was strong, so full of life, and undeniably
excited.

Still holding Josh’s head in place with one hand, Parker started

investigating Josh’s lower regions. When he brushed Josh’s fly with
his fingers, he was pleased to feel the hard bulge of an erection behind
it. Cupping it, he gave it a teasing squeeze. Josh moaned and melted
against him. Parker undid his fly, swallowing whatever weak attempt
at protest Josh made in another kiss. He sneaked his fingers into the
waistband of Josh’s boxers, found the eager cock beneath it, and freed
it. It leapt into his hand gratefully. Josh let out a needy whimper as
Parker tightened his fist around his shaft, and he pushed into the tight
channel Parker offered him.

“That’s it, baby,” Parker whispered. “Show me what you like.

Take what you need.” He turned Josh around, one arm wrapped
around his shoulders to hold him steady, and used his other hand to
jerk him off. Josh reflexively thrust into his grip, panting as he did so.
His head dropped back against Parker’s shoulder, baring the smooth
curve of his throat as he leaned on him for support. About two inches
shorter and of a much lighter build, he was a perfect fit for Parker’s
body. Parker smiled into his neck. It was so easy. Just a few more
strokes and Josh went still in his hold.

Newborn 27

 

“Oh.” Josh sounded endearingly surprised when he came. His

cock pulsed in Parker’s hand, and soon his knees buckled, and he
went limp in Parker’s grip.

“Steady, sweetheart.” Parker chuckled as he easily took most of

Josh’s weight to hold him upright. “How do you feel?”

“Pretty, um, good,” Josh answered in a voice that was rough with

postorgasmic tightness.

He turned around and timidly looked up at Parker. “Do you want

me to…uh…?”

“I think we ought to clean up first.”
“Huh?” Bewildered, Josh looked around the kitchen he’d just

cleaned so thoroughly.

“Not that,” Parker grinned. “This.” Holding up his hand, he

showed Josh the creamy white cum on his fingers.

“Oh.” Josh turned almost crimson. “Oh, gosh, I’m sorry, I’ll

just…” His eyed darted to and fro, frantically searching for a cloth.

“Just lick it off,” Parker suggested and brought his hand to Josh’s

lips. Pulling a face, Josh turned his head away.

“Never sampled it?”
Josh looked appalled. “No, of course not.”
“Why not? It’s just spunk. There’s nothing wrong with it,” Parker

teased.

“Because…well, you–you just don’t d–do that,” Josh answered a

little helplessly. “Do you?” he added, almost as an afterthought.

“All right, baby.” Parker smiled reassuringly and shrugged,

leaving the question unanswered. “Nothing you’re not comfortable
with.” Turning away, he washed his hands in the sink. “I’d like to
take you to bed now,” he said gently. “Is that okay for you?”

“Yes. I think so,” Josh answered, sounding not entirely convinced.

He wasn’t the most experienced, just as Parker had guessed, but that
would make it even sweeter to fuck him senseless.

“My room?”

28

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Josh nodded silently. He took the hand Parker offered and meekly

followed him upstairs. At the door he hesitated briefly but stepped
inside when Parker held it open for him with a little inviting gesture.

“Take your clothes off,” Parker ordered in a soft voice. Lowering

his gaze, Josh started fumbling with the buttons on his shirt. His
fingers trembled lightly, and he gripped his bottom lip with his teeth.

“Let me help you.” A few careful but efficient movements later,

Josh stood before him, naked and still half-hard. Or maybe again.
Fuck, the kid was twenty. He could probably go all night if taken
right.

Twenty. The thought rushed through Parker’s brain. Imagine what

you were like at twenty. Happy and unharmed by what life had thrown
at him only a few years later. Blissfully ignorant of what really
happened in the fragile bubble he’d thought was reality.

He undressed quickly, aware of Josh’s dark eyes watching him in

nervous apprehension. When they were both naked, he gently led Josh
to the bed and made him lie down, settling at his side. He kissed Josh
again, a tender promise to look out for him, and then he carefully
started exploring his body with his hands. Josh was undeniably
beautiful. At a little under six feet, he had probably already reached
his final height, but his too-slender, boyish frame was likely to fill out
a bit. He was going to turn into a very handsome young man, that was
easy to tell.

Josh arched up into the touch, soaking up each caress Parker gave

him, but when Parker’s hand slid between his legs to search out that
hidden place, he tensed, confirming Parker’s assumption.

“Nothing you’re not comfortable with,” Parker reminded him in a

soft whisper.

“I just…I’ve never…” Josh choked out.
Leaning back, Parker stared at him. “Not at all?”
“Not…like this.”
“As a bottom, you mean?”
“Is that what you call this?” Josh asked back tightly.

Newborn 29

 

“Oh, sweetheart,” Parker sighed, understanding at last. “You’ve

never been with a man, have you?”

Looking mortified, Josh bit his lip and shook his head. Parker put

his arm around Josh’s shoulders in a reassuring embrace. “We don’t
have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“But I do. I think,” Josh objected. “I just…don’t know how.”
“Well, if you’re going to let me fuck you then it would be easiest

for you to be on your hands and knees.”

“But I can’t see you that way, can I?”
“Not very well, no,” Parker confirmed. “We can do it missionary-

style if you want. It won’t give me quite such a good angle, but we’ll
do whatever works best for you, sweetheart.”

“No, it’s okay. If you say that’s the best way, then we’ll do that.”
“Sure?”
Josh looked up at him with those big, soft-brown eyes of his.

“Yes. I trust you.”

Parker swallowed around the lump that had suddenly appeared in

his throat. Josh trusted him. What on earth had he done to deserve that
trust? He quickly lowered his head for another quick kiss so Josh
wouldn’t see his eyes.

“Okay then,” Parker said. “Roll over.” He waited for Josh to

obediently turn around then got up to kneel behind him, admiring the
view. Josh shifted uneasily under Parker’s gaze, clearly not used to
being the object of such close scrutiny. Careful not to startle him,
Parker ran his hands over the long stretch of Josh’s back and rested
them on his buttocks. He gave both tight, perfect cheeks a gentle
squeeze before parting them to reveal the entrance they hid. Josh
almost jumped off the bed when Parker brushed the sensitive skin
with his thumb.

“Uh,” he groaned. “Could you…can you tell me what you’re

doing, please?”

“I’m going to open you up with my fingers first, sweetheart,”

Parker explained calmly and planted a kiss on Josh’s left butt cheek.

30

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“With your fingers?”
“Uh-huh.”
“But I thought you’d just…you know. Stick it in.”
“Oh, baby.” Parker smiled. “If I did that it would probably be the

last time you let anyone do this to you.” He sighed. “I know it might
be a bit weird for you, but trust me, it’s better this way.” There it was
again. Trust. How could he expect Josh to just put all this trust in
him?

“Don’t worry. I’ll use lots of oil and take it slowly. You’ll barely

feel it.”

“Oh,” Josh gasped when Parker drew a circle with his tongue on

the skin he’d just kissed.

“Oil?”
“Yep. Nicked it from the kitchen.” Parker congratulated himself

on his quick action. It wasn’t ideal, but it was better than nothing.
Fucking Josh without lubrication would have been impossible.

“Okay.” Pushing back a little, Josh offered himself to Parker’s

touch. He flinched at the first contact with the cool, slick cooking oil
but stayed where he was. Very carefully, Parker pushed one finger
into Josh’s body. As expected, Josh tensed but didn’t move until
Parker added a second finger.

“Oh.” Josh’s head snapped up. “Oh, that’s…unghh.”
“I know,” Parker confirmed, holding Josh steady with his free

hand while tentatively pushing in deeper, as he was making room for
himself inside Josh’s body. Finding the right spot wasn’t difficult. He
knew he had it when Josh yelped and flexed his hips instinctively. Not
giving him time to think, Parker started fucking him with his fingers,
making sure to rub that little sensitive spot every other time or so.
Josh didn’t even seem to notice when Parker added a third finger to
stretch him nicely.

“Okay, baby. Enough with the foreplay,” Parker warned him after

a few moments. “I know you’re young, and I’ve no doubt that you’ll

Newborn 31

 

come again easily, but I don’t want to push my luck by having to try
for a third time.”

He removed his fingers, amused at the little frustrated sound Josh

made, and quickly rolled on a condom. He’d already slicked Josh up
very well, and the tight channel was slippery with oil, so he didn’t
bother adding any more to his own cock. A quick check assured him
that Josh was still all up for it, so he pushed in, at long last sinking
gratefully into the slick heat of Josh’s body. Josh gasped at the
intrusion, but there was only a little discomfort in the sound, and he
didn’t try to shrink away from it. Parker pulled out a bit and gave a
careful first thrust, dragging a ragged moan from Josh’s throat. Okay.
Nothing wrong there.

Parker repeated the gentle strokes a few more times to let Josh get

the hang of it, then started fucking him in earnest. Soon he found out
what Josh liked best and willingly gave him the deep, hard strokes
that drew a delighted whimper from him every time Parker rubbed his
sweet spot. As he was pounding into the welcoming, velvety heat of
Josh’s body over and over again, Parker found at last the forgiveness
he craved. Sweet and pure and just so very much alive, Josh gave him
everything. Not wanting him to end up any sorer than necessary,
Parker didn’t do much to hold back, and Josh didn’t need much
encouragement either. They climaxed almost simultaneously, Parker
buried deep inside Josh’s body, Josh from nothing more than getting
fucked.

“Ooh. Ouch,” Josh groaned when Parker pulled out after a few

seconds of blissful, exhausted aftermath.

“Sorry, sweetheart, but I have to get rid of the condom.”
“Oh. Of course.”
“Josh?”
“Hm?”
“You can lie down now.”
“Er…okay.”

32

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As he was watching Josh crash on the mattress and instantly curl

up on his side, Parker could do nothing about the fond smile that crept
onto his face. He quickly took care of the condom and slid under the
duvet to lie next to Josh, who instantly shifted to snuggle up to him.
For what must have been the first time in over a decade, Parker didn’t
mind a postcoital cuddle. Quite the opposite. Josh felt good in his
arms, and the smell of sweat and sex that filled the air mingled quite
nicely with Josh’s own clean scent. Now all that was missing was a
little chat.

“That was pretty amazing,” Josh whispered right on cue.
“Hmm. Yes, it was,” Parker confirmed drowsily.
“I didn’t know that was even possible.” Josh sounded puzzled.
“What was?” Parker asked, although he had a pretty good idea

what Josh meant. It was nice listening to Josh’s voice, husky from the
noises he’d made, and with all that sweet, sincere awe in it.

“I came just like…that.”
“Easy, young man,” Parker warned playfully. “One of us put a lot

of hard work into making you come.”

Josh looked up at him, confused at first, but then, understanding,

he smiled and explained, “Without touching…it, I mean.”

“Your dick? No, you can come just like that, if you’re lucky. Not

every guy can, though.”

“Can you?”
Parker shrugged. “I could and probably still can, but it’s been a

while since I bottomed for someone.”

“Oh. So not everyone does that, then?”
“Are you—” Parker started but interrupted himself. Josh looked

up at him with so much honest wonder and emotion in his eyes, and
Parker realised that he had failed to understand the extent of what
Josh had just given him.

“You really have no idea, have you?” he asked softly.

Newborn 33

 

“This is a small village,” Josh explained after a moment, sounding

apologetic. “Everybody knows each other, and you don’t…you’re just
not…” Embarrassed, he turned his head away.

“Gay,” Parker filled in for him.
“I guess that’s just changed, huh?” Josh asked in a voice so low it

was almost inaudible.

“Because you just had sex with a man, you mean?” Parker held

out a comforting hand when Josh flinched at the words. “No, I don’t
think that’s changed much, Josh. Not who you are. If you prefer guys
over girls, then that’s who you are. Acting on it is just the logical
consequence.”

“When did you know you were…uh, you know?”
“Gay? Come on, Josh.” Parker smiled and nudged him

affectionately in the ribs. “It’s just a word, you can say it. And I think
I’ve always known in some way. I was certain when I started jerking
off over a photograph of a cop in uniform.”

“What was it like for you?”
“Coming out?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Dunno.” Parker shrugged. “It’s never really been a question for

me, I think. It’s just the way I am and nothing to be ashamed of.”

“Oh, drat,” Josh groaned suddenly. “My parents are going to kill

me.” He swallowed and looked up imploringly. “Do they have to
know?”

Parker briefly considered telling him that his mother, at least,

already had her suspicions, but he decided against it. It was best for
Josh to take it one step at a time, and the step he had just taken was a
very big one. “I’m not going to tell them anything if you don’t want
me to, but I strongly recommend you tell them eventually. Not just
yet. Let it sink in, get used to the notion, and then, when you feel like
it, you can tell them.”

“When I feel like it? That will be never, then,” Josh said

unhappily.

34

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Parker pulled him a little closer. “Trust me, the time will come

when you want them to know. One day you’ll meet someone, and
you’ll know that you can’t hide who you are forever. Make sure you
don’t have too much you wish you could change then.”

“Is that how it was for you? Did you meet that someone?”
Parker shook his head. “No, sweetheart. I’ve never met anyone

who was worth changing my life for.”

“Then how do you know it’s going to happen?”
“I don’t.” Parker shrugged. “But I know that there’s no point in

living a lie.”

“I don’t think I’ll have much choice,” Josh said sadly.
“Why’s that?”
“My parents want me to manage the hotel when I’ve finished my

degree. I can’t just go and live somewhere else.”

“Maybe what your parents want isn’t what you have to do. Ever

thought of that?”

Josh let out a resigned sigh. “It’s my life. I’ve known where I’m

headed since I was a child, and I don’t think I could do anything else.
Gosh, I wouldn’t even know what to do.”

“Well, if it’s what you want, okay. But if you’re gay, then that’s

okay, too. Go out, fuck your way through the boys in town, or find the
one you want to settle down with. Just don’t deny who you are and
marry a girl and start a family or something equally stupid.”

Josh regarded him thoughtfully. “Have you ever, um, had sex with

a girl?”

“No,” Parker said. “You?”
“Well, yes.” Josh didn’t look proud.
“And? How was it?”
“Icky. Wet and squidgy and somehow…oh, I don’t know.”
“Wrong,” Parker prompted. Josh nodded mutely.
“See? That’s what I’m talking about. Don’t do that to yourself.”

Parker kissed the top of Josh’s head. “Now go to sleep, okay?”

“Okay.”

Newborn 35

 

Josh turned around and curled up in Parker’s arms. Within

minutes, his soft, regular breathing filled Parker’s ears. Parker didn’t
really understand why he let Josh stay to sleep. It had been a long
time since he’d allowed a lover—or himself—that degree of intimacy,
but something about Josh made him want to just cling on. Listening to
Josh’s breath coming and going, Parker eventually drifted off to sleep.

He woke with a start what seemed a mere few minutes later but

must have been several hours. “Josh!”

“Hmph?” Josh stirred drowsily in Parker’s arms.
“Get up, kiddo. There’s a car outside.”
“Oh. Oh, ouch.” Sitting up, Josh promptly pulled a face.
“Sore?” Parker grinned, already up and half-dressed. Unlike Josh,

he was used to waking up in an instant. Yawning widely, Josh
staggered out of bed. Sleep-flushed and with a definite hint of stubble
rash on his chin, he looked exactly like what he’d done just a few
hours earlier. There was no way he could meet his parents or anybody
else like that.

“Listen, kiddo. I’ll go downstairs and take care of whoever it is.

You just go and take a shower. You need it.”

“But what if it’s my parents?” Josh asked, pale with dread.
“Then you’ll deal with them. It’s only seven in the morning, and

there’s nothing wrong with you taking a shower, is there?”

Josh nodded silently.
“Now go, kiddo.”
Head hanging low, Josh went to the door.
“Josh?” Parker went after him. The sadness in Josh’s eyes tore at

his heart.

“Good morning,” Parker said softly and tilted Josh’s head up for a

short but tender kiss. “I’ll talk to you tonight, okay?”

Josh’s eyes lit up like a child’s at Christmas. “Okay.”

36

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Chapter 2

In the week that followed, Parker spent the days chasing after his

demons and the nights seeking oblivion in the shelter of Josh’s arms,
burying himself in his lover’s willing, warm flesh to search for the
peace of mind he had been craving for so long.

He had to tread the ground carefully and come up with pretences

to talk to the villagers. Little by little, he found out about all the
deserted, remote buildings in the area and staked them out with
meticulous thoroughness. He found nothing and was wondering
frequently whether the hint he’d been given might just be another
dead end after all. It probably was, but something in him refused to let
that possibility become something he had to consciously deal with. If
he did, he’d have to accept the consequences, and doing that meant
he’d have to leave. And that was another thing he refused to deal
with, just as he refused to think about his reasons for staying.

The truth, if he’d dared to look at it, was that he enjoyed his stay

at the little hotel with the beautiful view immensely, just as he
enjoyed the company of sweet-natured, one-track-minded Josh.

They made love until sheer exhaustion forced them to stop then

used the breaks to talk. Josh held nothing back. He bared his soul to
Parker just as unrestrainedly as he offered him his body. Parker
learned a lot about his young lover and was more than once astounded
at the serenity and gentleness with which Josh accepted his fate.
Josh’s parents, that much Parker found out within the first two nights,
didn’t understand their son at all. Josh was an only child, conceived
after years of fruitless efforts and born to parents who loved him to
bits but were simply too far ahead on their own life paths to connect

Newborn 37

 

to their child. A child that had always been just that little bit different.
Too bright to fit in with the other kids, too sensitive to cope with the
resulting bullying, and too gentle to fight his fate. And gay.

On the one hand, this lack of a bond between parents and son

meant that Josh was unable to confide in them, but on the other, it
meant that they didn’t mind him spending his evenings with Parker.
Little did they know that those evenings invariably ended in bed.
Once he had overcome his initial virginal coyness, Josh turned out to
be virtually insatiable and a very curious and fast learner. It didn’t
take him long to figure out what Parker liked, and his willingness to
please soon had him reconsider what he deemed inappropriate. Maybe
it was because Josh was still so young, and his body was finally
awakening from the slumber it had been forced into. Or maybe he just
wanted to make up for all the time he’d already lost.

“You haven’t told me what you do for a living yet,” Josh asked

one night. He was in his favourite position, glued to Parker’s side
with his head resting on Parker’s shoulder, one arm and one leg
wrapped around Parker.

“Oh, nothing important,” Parker said evasively.
“Well, what is it? I can’t think of any job that would lead you

here, of all places.”

Parker sighed. One thing he had learned about Josh—when

something had sparked his interest, he would pursue the matter with
the eagerness of a bloodhound.

Ideally, Parker would have taken Josh’s mind off the question by

simply fucking him once more, but he was worn out. Besides, in all
probability not even Josh would be able to get it up again for at least
an hour or so.

“Come on, tell me,” Josh pushed.
For some reason, Parker found he just couldn’t feed Josh the usual

lies, so he decided for a half truth.

“I’m…I guess you could say investigating something.”

38

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“Investigating?” Josh raised his head to look at him excitedly.

“How cool is that? Are you a cop? What’s your reason for being
here?”

“No. And I just…I’m trying to find someone.”
“Here?” Josh grinned. “Can’t be that difficult. If they’re from

around here, I probably know them. What’s the name?”

Parker shook his head regretfully. “Josh. Easy. They’re not from

around, I don’t know the name, and I want you to stay out of this, got
it? In fact, you should forget I ever told you this.”

The enthusiasm in Josh’s eyes dimmed, and he appeared hurt.

“Why are you angry at me? I was just trying to help.”

“I’m not angry, baby,” Parker said softly. “It’s just that the people

I’m looking for are dangerous. They are very dangerous, in fact, and I
wouldn’t want you anywhere near them, okay?”

Josh chuckled. “Seriously, Parker, nothing is dangerous around

here apart from the traffic, maybe, but even that’s—ouch!”

Cupping Josh’s head with one hand, Parker made him look up and

meet his eyes. He knew his grip was stronger than necessary and
borderline violent, but he needed Josh to understand that this wasn’t a
matter to be taken lightly.

“I want you to listen very carefully, Josh Summers,” he said

earnestly. “There are things in this world that you have no idea exist.
They are dangerous, they can hurt you, and yes, they might very well
exist around here.”

“Ooh. You make it sound so scary,” Josh said, wriggling out of

Parker’s hold. “Like the bogeyman.”

“Yeah. Like the bogeyman,” Parker confirmed. “Only that they’re

real. This isn’t some kind of fairy tale to scare little children off, Josh,
and I need you to believe it and trust me on that. You’re way too
important to me to risk you getting hurt.”

“Really?”
“What?”
“Am I important to you?”

Newborn 39

 

Parker smiled at the gleam in Josh’s eyes. “Yes.” He kissed the tip

of Josh’s nose. “You’re very important to me, kiddo. You’re the best
that has happened to me in a long, long time.”

Josh’s smile quivered as emotions welled up in his eyes. “You’re

the best that’s happened to me in my entire life,” he whispered.

“Oh, sweetheart.” Pulling him close, Parker stroked his hair

affectionately. “You’re so young. You’ve still got a lot of time for
good things to happen to you.”

“Parker?”
“Hm?”
“Have you ever been in love?” Josh’s voice was shaky and Parker

groaned inwardly, sensing where this was headed. “No,” he said
warily.

“Oh.” Thoughtful silence.
“Why?” Parker couldn’t help asking, even though he knew he was

going to regret it.

Josh was choked with emotion as he whispered, “I think I’m

falling in love with you.”

“Oh, Josh.” Parker sighed. “Be careful with those words. You are

young, and I’m your first. You’re bound to have feelings for me
beyond those of a casual affair but—”

Josh stopped him with a kiss. “It’s okay. Please don’t say that I’m

just imagining this. I know you think I’m young and naive, and
maybe you’re right and I’m being a fool, but I’ve never felt this way
before, and I just thought you should know.” He huffed and wriggled
out of Parker’s hold. “Anyway, I really should go back to my room
now in case Mum checks on me when she’s locked up for the night.”
He quickly slipped into his jeans and T-shirt and headed for the door.

“Josh, wait,” Parker said and grabbed Josh’s wrist to hold him

back. “Don’t leave while you’re upset, please. Listen to me, kiddo.
You are young, but I don’t think you’re a fool. I think you’re the
sweetest, most amazing guy I’ve ever met. It’s just…in my life there
isn’t much room for feelings, let alone for falling in love. I’ve never

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had anything like what we have right now, and I’m just not prepared
for it. I haven’t got a clue what on earth I have done to deserve the
affection of somebody like you.” He looked into Josh’s eyes
imploringly. “Please, sweetheart. Give an old man a little time to
come to terms with his feelings and get used to the idea of being
happy, would you?”

A sweet smile spread slowly across Josh’s face. “Are you

serious?”

“I am. You’re special, Josh, and I would be the fool if I let you get

away.” He tilted Josh’s chin up for a long, tender kiss.

“Sleep tight, kiddo, and have a lovely day. I’d like to take you out

tomorrow night, so make up a nice story for your parents, okay?”

“Okay.” The smile on Josh’s face as he left was happiness turned

visible.

Newborn 41

 

Chapter 3

Parker never got a chance to take Josh out. One of his contacts

called him at dawn with information about a potential vampire hiding
place high up in the north. He left instantly to investigate but couldn’t
find anything, not even a trace, which was strange. He had been so
certain to have come closer than ever, but this track was so cold it was
freezing.

By the time he returned, it was well past eleven and much too late

to go out. When Josh didn’t come to see him that night, Parker knew
he needed something good to make it up to him. Josh was bound to
feel disappointed, and Parker would have loved to just go to his room
and explain everything, but he didn’t dare do so in case Josh’s parents
noticed something. His bedroom was right next to his parents’ on the
top floor, which was the private section of the hotel, so Parker would
have no excuse if he got caught there.

He was hoping to see Josh at breakfast the next morning, but Josh

didn’t turn up. When asked, his mother told Parker that Josh had been
out with a friend and had called to say that he would stay the night.
Parker sighed. It seemed he had better come up with a very good plan
to get back into Josh’s good books.

The impatient ring of his phone interrupted his thoughts. Still

wondering how to soothe a very disappointed and almost certainly
cranky lover, he answered and was surprised to hear the name of the
police officer he’d contacted upon his arrival.

“What can I do for you?” he asked curiously, putting Josh to the

back of his mind for the time being.

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“Uh, nothing,” Officer Barry answered, sounding a little

bewildered. “You asked me to call you if anything out of the ordinary
happened.”

Parker perked up. “Yes, that’s right.”
“Well, I’m not sure if this is the kind of thing you’re looking for,

but we just received a call informing us that a group of approximately
five people were seen leaving a reportedly vacant house. The
Gunners’ farm, to be precise.”

He instantly had Parker’s full attention. Parker hastily scribbled

down the directions Barry gave him, and when he rang off, his heart
was hammering madly in his chest. Maybe this was the breakthrough
he’d been hoping for. Gunners’ Farm was a place he hadn’t staked out
yet, skipping it on the grounds of it being simply too far away to
waste the time of driving there. Half an hour later, he met Officer
Barry in front of a wide but low farmhouse. It seemed to have been
deserted for quite a while, and its location far away from civilisation
and the proximity to the forest had begun to take their toll on it. Some
of the windows were shattered, and several tiles of the roof had gone
missing, exposing the withered and bleached wooden beams of the
underlying construction like the ribs of a skeleton.

Parker suppressed a shudder at the thought. “Can we go inside?”

he asked impatiently.

“Sure.” With an obvious lack of enthusiasm, Officer Barry opened

the front door. It screeched loudly on its hinges, a desperate, mournful
cry breaking through the peaceful quiet of the blistering hot summer
day. Following him inside, Parker braced himself for whatever the
outcome was going to be. He waited for a moment to give his eyes
time to adapt to the shadows and carefully map the layout of the old
farm building. The air inside was relatively nice and cool, although it
smelled unsurprisingly stale and dead after countless months of
abandonment. And if it had been stirred lately, as Parker hoped it had,
those who had moved inside the old house wouldn’t have felt the need
to let in fresh air. They didn’t care much for oxygen, at least not if it

Newborn 43

 

came in the gaseous form. They only ever took it bound to
haemoglobin.

“I’ll check the basement if you don’t mind,” Parker suggested,

knowing that the vampires were likely to have chosen the place that
would offer them the most protection.

“Yeah, all right.” Officer Barry shrugged. A little annoyed at so

much indifference, Parker considered telling him what they might be
about to face, but he decided against it. Too many times he had been
convinced of having found them, and too many times he had found
nothing. He knew better than to make a fool of himself by voicing his
suspicions, or rather, by telling the truth. Those who were still
ignorant of the monsters they shared their world with deserved to
remain ignorant. There was no point scaring them, because they
wouldn’t believe it anyway. Unless they actually met one of them.
No, Parker had learned to deal with the problem in secrecy.

He gripped his weapons tightly, glad that he had chosen the pieces

that combined a minimum of size with a maximum of effect. Blinding
grenades had turned out to be quite astonishingly successful with
vampires. It seemed to harm their supersensitive eyes even more than
those of the average human and usually kept them disoriented long
enough for Parker to get close and decapitate them with a hearty
swing of the evil, custom-made switchblade knife he was carrying. Of
course, should these two favourite weapons fail him, there was always
the joker he had up his sleeve. Virtually. A proper grenade with the
power to blow up the entire building and everything inside it. Parker
himself would end up as collateral damage, just like poor Officer
Barry, but it was worth it.

If there indeed were vampires present, Barry wasn’t going to be

much help, Parker knew that. Trying to make as little noise as
possible, he sneaked down the dank, slippery stairs to the basement.
His heart hammered frantically. He knew he stood little chance to
approach a vampire unnoticed, so his only advantage was the element
of surprise if he was the one who attacked them without so much as a

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warning. And they couldn’t possibly expect the attack to be made
with grenades. When he reached the bottom step, his heart sank. The
basement consisted of exactly one large storage room—one entirely
empty, large storage room. He turned around and slowly went back up
the stairs, convinced that there would be nothing to find in the rest of
the house either. This was just a false alarm, like so many, and big,
bloody idiot that he was, he had gone in a huff about it and got his
hopes up for nothing. All that was left for him to do now was to thank
Officer Barry for his help and start the drive back to the hotel. Maybe
he could use the half hour it would take him to get back to think of an
appropriate way to apologise to Josh. Perhaps he should ask him out
for dinner, charm him thoroughly, and fuck him silly somewhere
outside. It would certainly be warm enough for some al fresco sex,
and the area offered plenty of quiet, well-hidden places where two
guys could have a romp in the hay without risking exposure. The
thought was quite appealing, really. He could only hope for Josh to
forgive him and be up for it. When he reached the top step, Parker
nearly bumped into Officer Barry.

“Well, thank you, Off—” Parker started before he realised that

Barry was staring at him with wide, horrified eyes.

“What’s up?” Parker asked, all senses alert.
“I…I’ll have to call backup,” Barry said hollowly.
“What? Why?”
“This has just become a crime scene.” Pale and aghast, Barry

pointed at one of the rooms. His hand was shaking. “In there. Oh,
God.”

“What is in there?”
“It’s…oh, God,” Barry repeated and rubbed his eyes as if trying to

wipe away whatever they had seen. “It is too horrible. You can go in
there and see for yourself, but be sure not to touch anything, okay?”

“Sure.” Parker went into what once had probably been the dining

room. Unlike the empty basement, there were still some pieces of
furniture in it. The one that instantly caught Parker’s attention was a

Newborn 45

 

huge old wooden table that stood in the middle of the big room,
several feet away from the door. Large enough to hold a dinner party
of eight, it currently held only one person. Spread-eagled and tied up
by the wrists and ankles, a man was lying on it, motionless. Too
motionless. His head was hanging over the end of the table, twisted
back at an awkward angle so he was facing the wall at the other end
of the room. The position left his throat stretched and exposed. His
naked torso was completely still. No breath stirred the eerily pale skin
that stretched over his rib cage and stomach, but Parker didn’t need to
check his breathing to know that the man was dead. He must have
been. Nobody could have lost this much blood and still be alive.
Gushing from wounds in both wrists and on his neck, it had pooled on
the floor where the old, polished oak was soaked with its deep-red
colour.

Parker sighed. Whoever had done this must be seriously disturbed.

Disturbed, but human. No vampire would have settled for cutting the
arteries to spill and thus waste so much blood. No. Had it been
vampires, their victim would still have been bled out, but there
wouldn’t be a drop of blood left to see.

“Damn sick bastards,” Officer Barry grumbled under his breath.

“Twenty-two years without a murder, and then this,” he groaned.
“And guess what? No network.” He held up his mobile phone and
waggled it theatrically. Parker checked his own phone. Nothing. He
shook his head.

“I’ll try again,” Barry said tiredly. “Maybe outside…” His voice

trailed off as he left the house.

“Guess this means you’re going to have to wait a little longer for

someone to release you,” Parker said to the body on the table. “Poor
bastard.”

A faint, barely audible sound made him jerk his head up and

automatically reach for his knife. He listened intently. There it was
again. A faint, wheezing sound, like a sigh. But that wasn’t possible.
Parker was alone. His gaze trailed to the body on the table, this time

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looking more closely. There, his chest had moved by just the fraction
of an inch, hadn’t it? Staring at the bare skin, Parker noticed
something else, too. The ribbed stretch of skin that covered lean but
hard stomach muscles, that mole just below the right nipple. The head
tilted back to offer that delicate spot where neck and collarbone met.
The spot that had never failed to invoke a full-body shiver when
Parker had kissed it. Parker swayed when the oxygen suddenly
seemed to vanish from the room. He forced himself to take a step
closer. He needed to know. He needed to verify that this…dead body
was not…it could not be—“Oh my God, Josh!” A part of Parker
wanted to just scream and rant, to do something that would help him
vent the agony that tore through his chest and seemed to rip his
insides apart, but he couldn’t. Instead, he stood frozen to the point and
stared helplessly at Josh’s exposed throat. It took another faint moan
to startle him into action. He rushed to the other end of the table and
shifted Josh’s head so it came to rest at a less awkward angle and
breathing would be a little less difficult for him. Josh’s eyelids
fluttered, but his beautiful, gentle eyes remained hidden. He snatched
a shaky gulp of air and let it out in a groan.

“That’s it, gorgeous. Breathe. Very well,” Parker coaxed while

mechanically inspecting the wounds on Josh’s neck. What he’d
assumed to be cuts turned out to be well-disguised bite marks. They
weren’t easy to identify, but Parker knew what he was looking for.
His head started spinning. So the vampires had been here after all.
And of all the people in this godforsaken town, they had taken Josh.
Josh, who, in spite of all the blood he’d lost, hadn’t died yet but was
still struggling to suck in desperate, shallow breaths. He seemed to be
trying to gather the strength to speak.

“Shh, easy, kiddo,” Parker soothed, stroking Josh’s hair. He

winced. The silky, thick strands were clotted with blood.

“Park,” Josh gasped.
“Yes, baby, I’m here. Easy. Don’t talk, sweetheart. Just try to

keep breathing, okay?”

Newborn 47

 

“Parker,” Josh repeated. The ghost of a smile crossed his face, but

was fading away again instantly. “I…love you. They…want me…tell
you…stop…chasing…” It seemed that he wanted to say more, but
whatever it was got lost in his dried-out throat. His chest heaved in
the desperate attempt to provide more oxygen for a heart about to lose
the battle that had been over before it had begun. Parker felt its faint
flutter under his fingertips, and he felt its futile struggle to send what
little blood was left through Josh’s drained veins. Instead, another thin
trickle of pale-red liquid seeped from the wound in his throat. A few
endless moments later, there was nothing left for Parker to feel. Josh’s
body had lost the fight.

“I love you, too, kiddo,” Parker whispered. Bending down, he was

just about to brush a kiss across Josh’s cold, chapped lips when he
noticed the blood in the corner of Josh’s mouth. Just a few drops that
had dried to brown, rusty crumbs. Maybe they had hit him, Parker
tried to tell himself. Maybe Josh had bitten himself during whatever
ordeal they had put him through. But he knew better. He gingerly
tugged at Josh’s chin to force his jaws open. One look into Josh’s
mouth confirmed his fears. There was more blood on his teeth.
Parker’s stomach jolted painfully at the sight.

The bastards must have fed him their blood. Fed him vampire

blood, cut his arteries, and left him to bleed out and die alone like an
animal. Except it looked like they hadn’t meant for him to die alone.
They’d left just enough blood to allow the fight to go on for a while,
to give Parker the time to miss him and find him. To find him in time
for Josh to deliver the message. Stop chasing. Josh’s last words,
exhaled along with his final breath. Josh was dead, had suffered
unimaginable pain at the hands—and teeth—of those merciless
monsters, and all just because Parker wouldn’t stop chasing them.
Because he had got too close.

It was the explanation that made the most sense. The trail he had

been following hadn’t been a cold one, after all. It had been the right
one, at last, after all these years. He had been so close to tracking

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them down, but once again, they had succeeded in turning around on
him and taking from him what he treasured the most.

He remained standing at Josh’s side, stroking his clammy

forehead with numb fingers until the sound of heavy footsteps
dragged him back to reality.

“Still no fucking reception,” Officer Barry grunted. “I think I’ll

just drive back and return with the others. You okay?” A concerned
look appeared on his face.

“Huh?” Parker startled. “Oh, yes. Yes. I was just…”
“Oh God, I’m sorry,” Barry said. “You’ve met him, haven’t you?

I should have warned you.” He crossed the room and looked at Josh’s
corpse with a heartfelt sigh. “What kind of people would do
something like this?”

His mind was racing, but Parker kept his outward calm. He

shrugged, trying to act as if this was just an ordinary crime scene.
“I’m not an expert, but my guess would be Satanists. They pop up
everywhere these days.”

“No.” Barry shook his head. “Not Josh Summers. He’s a good kid.

I’ve known him ever since he was a baby. He’s never done anything
out of line. If anything, the boy’s been too nice for his own good.”

“They were probably not from around here.”
“You mean they just came here, did whatever they did to the poor

kid, and left?”

“Yes. Came here where nobody knows them, killed one of the

locals, and moved on. My guess is they’re already miles away from
here.” Parker put a puzzled expression on his face. “I’m just
astonished that they left him here. Usually those freaks take the
bodies with them and hide them in a place where they never turn up
again.”

“They must have thought no one would come here anymore,”

Barry said pensively. “Well, I certainly wouldn’t mind them being
from somewhere else. To think someone I’ve known all their lives
was capable of this…” He groaned. “God, what a waste. Just what am

Newborn 49

 

I supposed to tell Katie and Andy? They’re going to be devastated.”
He heaved another sigh. “Their only son, and such a nice kid.
Anyway, I’d better get going.”

“Listen, um, if you’re heading back to town, you don’t mind me

leaving, too, do you? Only something came up at home, which
requires me to return today, and I was going to leave as soon as
possible. It’s quite a bit later than I wanted it to be as it is.”

Barry shook his head. “No problem. You can go. We don’t need

you here. I’ve got your number in case anything comes up. One thing,
though,” he added gravely, “don’t mention anything to his parents yet,
okay?”

“No. No, I won’t.” He wouldn’t have time to. Leaving with

Officer Barry now would be cutting it close as it was, but it was the
only plan Parker had been able to come up with in what little time
he’d had to think. Make Barry believe he’d lost interest, lead him to
suspect a group of youths to be the culprits. Leave town, double back
to pick up Josh’s body before the police had time to fetch him, and
then get the hell away from this place and back home.

Everything went smoothly. He followed Barry’s car all the way to

the junction that led to Lakeview Hotel but as soon as the officer was
out of sight, he turned around and raced back. He hated having to
simply cut Josh loose and dump him in the trunk of his car, but it
couldn’t be helped. He couldn’t risk being seen by the police on the
way back.

Katie Summers was a bit surprised when he checked out in a

hurry, but since he’d originally booked the room for just the one week
anyway, he hoped it wasn’t too conspicuous. He only did it to keep up
at least a minimum of appearances, hoping that Barry would pick up
on his hint that the Satanists usually took their victim’s body with
them.

All the way back to his home, he kept checking the rearview

mirror. He wasn’t sure how much time he had but guessed that it

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wouldn’t be more than a few hours. Not much time to make
preparations.

Newborn 51

 

Chapter 4

Parker was immensely grateful that he was simply too busy to

think much. Accepting that Josh was dead was one thing, but knowing
that he was very likely to be undead was an entirely different matter.
All the time he was working, he was forcing himself to no longer
think of the motionless, mangled heap of flesh and bones in the corner
as Josh. He was one of them now. Or rather, he was going to be one
of them in a few hours’ time.

Parker had just finished checking his work for the umpteenth time

when it began. He had seen vampires at all stages of their existence,
most of them at the final, but he had never witnessed the actual
turning process. At first he was watching with cold, clinical
detachedness, but soon, what he saw got to him. It might have been
only because somehow this was still Josh, after all, his sweet,
innocent Josh, who was suffering, but after a while even Parker had to
admit that this was nothing any creature should have to endure.

Josh’s slender body was rocked by violent, uncontrollable spasms

that had him alternately double over or bend backwards, as if he was
trying to find some way to escape. The tendons in his neck were
standing out like steel cords with strain, and his skin was glistening
with sweat. He screamed until his voice gave out, and the only sounds
that still escaped his throat were pain-filled, heartbreaking whimpers.

More than once, Parker was tempted to go to him and try to do

something, anything to relieve his agony, but there was nothing he
could do. He wouldn’t even be able to hold him for comfort, that
much was clear from the moments when Josh started twisting his head
this way and that, snapping viciously at thin air with fangs that had

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yet to grow. Eventually, Parker couldn’t stand it anymore. He got up
and left, leaning against the door after locking it carefully, but its
solid steel did nothing to block the images that kept haunting his
tormented brain.

Even upstairs, in the safe confinement of his home, Parker

couldn’t escape the sight of Josh’s torment that had imprinted itself on
his mind, and he could still hear the cries of terror and agony. At
some point during the night the screaming stopped, but the silence
that followed was just as bad. It required action. Reality had to be
faced, and a choice had to be made. Parker dressed and went down the
stairs to the basement, bracing himself for the unavoidable.

The door opened without a sound of its well-oiled hinges, but

Parker was under no illusions. He knew that the vampire was aware of
his presence and had probably noticed his approach from the moment
he had set foot on the top of the stairs.

Parker took a deep breath and flicked on the light. Crouching

against the wall in the far corner of the room, the creature blinked and
tried to hide his eyes behind his forearm.

Newborns. Their eyes were so sensitive. Parker knew from

experience that at this stage, light was a powerful weapon. A few of
them had died because of it.

Ignoring the vampire’s frantic attempts at shielding his eyes,

Parker looked at the chains. They seemed to be intact, just as they
should be. After all, they had been designed to withstand a pulling
force of several thousand pounds. But then again, newborns were
already quite strong. Strong and unpredictable. Parker took a few
cautious steps closer and promptly the chains started jingling again
from being tugged at. Parker stopped and watched in silence. Blinded
by the light, the newborn had to rely on his other senses. When there
was nothing for him to hear, he went still and listened attentively.
Apparently he hadn’t yet figured out that his sense of smell was just
as accurate as his sight.

Newborn 53

 

“H–hello?” he stammered, slowly twisting his wrists in the

shackles that held them.

Still trying to find a way out, Parker observed. He wasn’t going to

let himself be fooled by the creature’s harmless looks, just as he
refused to think of it as Josh. Josh was dead. He had died several
hours ago on a table under Parker’s hands. Parker swallowed. He
shouldn’t have let him come back, should have ended it right after he
had taken the body from the deserted house, but he had found it
impossible because, up until now, it had still been Josh. No, he
couldn’t have killed Josh. But he could annihilate vampires. He had
just needed to see for himself that the man he had fallen in love with
was gone once and for all.

“Hello? I–I know you’re there,” the vampire said timidly. “C–

could you p–please just s–say something? Please?” He sounded
frightened, panicky even.

“Why? It won’t change anything,” Parker said coldly.
The vampire’s head turned in his direction. “P–Parker?” he

squealed.

“Yes.”
“Oh thank God, it’s you!” Josh gasped. “Please, hurry before they

come back!” There was so much honest relief in his voice, and there
was nothing Parker would have loved to do more than to oblige and
release Josh, gather him up in his arms, kiss that frightened expression
from his face, and tell him that everything was going to be okay. But
it wasn’t. Josh was dead, and they were no longer his enemies. He had
become one of them.

“Parker? What’s up? Please, take me home!” the vampire pleaded

again. It was more than Parker could take.

“Shut up!” he yelled, feeling a twinge of cruel satisfaction when

the vampire flinched and shrank back against the wall. Parker
approached him warily but stayed well out of his reach and within
close distance of the door. Eventually the vampire opened his eyes

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and blinked into the brightness of the light. When he found Parker, his
warm brown eyes were full of confusion and hurt.

“Parker, what’s wrong?” he asked quietly. “What’s happened?”
“Why don’t you tell me?” Parker suggested, honestly curious. He

had never had the chance to find out how much a vampire
remembered of life before they were turned or whether they had any
memories of the actual turning process.

“There isn’t much I can tell you. I went to cinema with a mate

from school, went home, and…” Josh’s eyes widened fearfully.
“They must have waited for me,” he whispered. “The people you
were searching for. Please, Parker. Let me go.” He gave his chains a
light tug. “I’m sorry. Don’t be angry, please. I didn’t mean to get
involved in your investigations.”

“You think you’re here because you got involved in my

investigations?” Parker asked, thrown off track for a moment.

Josh—the vampire—nodded miserably. “You said I shouldn’t,

and I didn’t mean to, honestly, but they…they were just there and
took me to this house, and they said I should tell you to stop looking
for them.”

“Yeah, I remember. You already said so before—earlier,” Parker

corrected himself.

“Then they tied me down and…” The vampire broke off and

shook his head, as if trying to get rid of whatever memories filled it.
He took a breath and shuddered. “They c–cut me, and I–I think I m–
must have hallucinated then.” The sheer terror on his face told Parker
clearly what he thought he’d hallucinated. Oh, Josh. Knowing that
this was what had happened to him and that Josh had died believing
Parker was disappointed in him…it was killing Parker and made him
hate the bloodsucking monsters even more. Glaring at the one
cowering before him, Parker ran his fingers through his hair. He
needed a moment to clear his head, to tuck the memories of Josh up
somewhere safe. Somewhere the dangerous, deceitful beast he had
become couldn’t reach and spoil them with his lies.

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“Parker, please,” the vampire begged.
“Shut up!” Parker shouted and spat, “Just shut up, you fucking

little parasite! You disgust me!”

If anyhow possible, the vampire’s ashen, bloodless face went yet

another shade paler.

“Parker!” he gasped, appalled. “What is the matter with you? Why

are you so angry?”

“I’m not angry,” Parker said very pointedly. “I’m fucking livid,

and you’re going to pay for what you are!”

“What I am? What are you talking about? It’s me, Parker. Josh.

Just the same old me, maybe a little frayed around the edges, but me.”

“No.” Parker tried hard not to listen to that soft voice. “You’re not

Josh. You might look like him, sound like him, hell, even have his
memories, but you are not him. Josh is gone, and you are just a
monster in disguise.”

“What? But…how can you say that? I’m not—”
“Think about what happened after they cut you,” Parker said

acidly. “I wasn’t lying when I told you there are things you didn’t
know existed in this world. Now you are one of them.”

The vampire stared at him blankly for a moment, and then, for the

first time, he started tugging at his chains in earnest. They didn’t give
an inch. “Please, Parker,” he pleaded again in Josh’s desperate little
voice. “It’s me, I swear. Please. You know it’s me. You know
everything about me,” he choked out, sounding close to tears. Parker
swallowed around the brick-sized lump in his throat. Josh…

“I love you, Parker. I love you more than anybody or anything

else, and I’m so sorry. I promise I’ll be good. Please, can we just go
home now?”

Parker shook his head. The vampire was good. Too good. Parker

was struggling to keep his distance and knew he wouldn’t be able to
resist much longer. “This is the last home you’ll know,” he said
coldly.

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Tears welled up in those soft-brown eyes. “But why? I already

said I’m sorry, Parker. What else do you want me to do?”

“Nothing. That’s exactly what you’ll get to do,” Parker snarled.

“Nothing. For the rest of your damn existence.”

“So this is it? This is what my life’s going to be like from now on?

Chained to a wall in a basement?” The already brittle voice broke on
the last word, closer than ever to panic.

Parker found he couldn’t meet Josh—the vampire’s—gaze, but

apparently there was no need to. His eyes widened in horrified
understanding.

“You’re going to kill me, aren’t you?” His voice was calm, the

words spoken matter-of-factly, and the weight of the axe in Parker’s
hand became almost unbearable. Josh couldn’t have seen it yet, but he
seemed to suspect that something was up. Vampires and their damn
uber-perceptive senses.

“Yes,” Parker said simply and took a step closer. It led him out of

the door’s shadow and brought him into Josh’s full sight. Predictably,
Josh shrank back from him and pressed himself up against the dank,
rough stone wall as far as he could go.

“Why?” he whispered, clearly terrified now.
“Isn’t that obvious?” Parker hissed coldly.
“But I’ve never done anything to harm you.”
“So what? You’re one of them, and given the opportunity, you

wouldn’t hesitate a second.” Gripping the axe’s handle tightly, Parker
forced himself to concentrate on what needed to be done. He took a
few slow steps closer. It was going to be so easy. A blow to the head,
strong enough to split the skull, and a few more to sever limbs from
rump and hack them into pieces. Pour oil on the remains—the canister
was already waiting in the aisle outside—and burn the vampire. He’d
done it several times before. There would be nothing left but a few
charred bones and a set of teeth. He suppressed a shudder. A
vampire’s fangs. Long and with needle-sharp tips, they were very
effective weapons. They were also the only part about a vampire that

Newborn 57

 

was really virtually indestructible. But they didn’t have to be. Once
their owner was annihilated, they were not a danger anymore.

He shifted his attention back to the vampire in front of him,

knowing that he had to keep his guard up. Even though he was only
an inexperienced newborn, chained up and weakened by starvation,
this one was still not to be underestimated. Just like any other species,
vampires were at their most dangerous when attacked and cornered.

Any moment now, as he became aware of the severity of the

situation, his instinct would take over. Parker knew what to expect.
Razor-sharp fangs that snapped at anything within reach and muscles
that were well capable of tearing him apart with their merciless
strength of steel cables. He crossed the rest of what little distance
there was between them, prepared to react as soon as he noticed the
first signs that the counterattack started. The solid weight of the axe in
his hand was his only ally.

The vampire watched his approach with an alarmed expression.

His eyes darted nervously between Parker’s hand and his face. They
were wide with fear, but other than that he didn’t let on that he knew
what was about to happen. He had finally given up his desperate
pleas.

Parker stopped in front of him, carefully staying out of what little

slack the chains had.

“So that’s it, then?” the vampire whispered.
“That’s it,” Parker confirmed, raising the axe. He watched the

newborn’s reaction closely, knowing that any second now, the mask
of frightened human would be dropped, and the monster would
surface. But it didn’t happen. There was no malice in Josh’s soft, even
features and no evil. There was nothing in those warm brown eyes but
quiet acceptance of his fate and, even now, a gentleness that touched
Parker’s heart to its very core.

“Don’t you think now would be a good time to fight?” Parker

grumbled tetchily.

“Why should I?” Again, nothing but subdued resignation.

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“Because it’s the last chance you’ll get.”
Still, the vampire didn’t move a muscle.
“So?” Parker waggled the axe a little.
The creature took a breath and slowly shook his head. “I really

don’t know what I’ve done to make you hate me so much, Parker.”

“What you’ve done to make me hate you?” Parker let out a bitter

chuckle. “It’s not what you’ve done, it’s what you are.”

“Well then.” The vampire swallowed. “If whatever I’ve become is

reason enough for you to kill me, then I’ll let you do it.”

“What? Are you out of your mind? I’m going to kill you. Don’t

you understand that?”

“I understand.” The vampire gave a light shrug.
“You. Will. Die,” Parker said very slowly, watching the face in

front of him closely.

“I know. I just hope…” Josh closed his eyes for a moment then

looked at Parker pleadingly. “Please make it fast, would you?”

“What are you playing at?” Parker squinted, trying to guess at

what wicked plan the vampire was scheming. He must be planning
something. He wouldn’t just calmly let Parker kill him—or would he?

“Nothing,” the vampire replied earnestly. “But if what I’ve turned

into is so bad, then it’s probably for the best if you…take me down. I
trust you.”

“You…what?” Of anything the newborn vampire could have said,

nothing could have affected Parker more than those three simple
words. I trust you. Josh had already trusted him with his body and
soul, had allowed Parker to touch him in ways nobody ever had
before, and revealed his darkest secrets to him, but this was more than
Parker knew how to handle.

“You know that your trust is going to cost you your life, don’t

you?” Parker threatened darkly for one last time. Josh just nodded and
held his gaze. He flinched almost imperceptibly but stood his ground
bravely. There was nowhere he could go anyway, but that hadn’t
stopped any of the others before him. Flexing the muscles in his arms

Newborn 59

 

like so many times before, Parker lifted the axe high and carefully
took aim. He would make it fast. Not as a small act of mercy, but
because it was the safest way for him to do this.

“I love you.”
Parker very nearly dropped the axe in surprise. “Huh?”
Josh looked almost embarrassed as he repeated, “I love you. I…I

just wanted you to know that in spite of everything…in spite
of…this.” He heaved a shuddery sigh. “It doesn’t change that. I know
it must be hard for you, but I want you to know that I forgive you.”

The sound of the axe as it slammed down reverberated loudly in

the silence of the old building’s basement. Parker left the room
without once looking back.

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Chapter 5

Josh slowly raised his head when Parker approached him. He

looked exhausted and, Parker noticed with grim satisfaction,
frightened. Lack of food was beginning to take its toll even on Josh’s
radiant beauty. It was amazing what effect starvation had on a
vampire’s attractive exterior. With his eyes dull and sunken deep in
his skull and his skin stretched like old parchment over his delicate
bones, he appeared older by about half a century.

“P–Parker,” he croaked. Even his voice was dried out. “I thought

you’d…” He didn’t finish the sentence. If it was because he didn’t
want to admit to what he had thought or if he simply couldn’t speak
anymore, Parker didn’t know, and he didn’t want to think about it
either. He dropped a small plastic bottle at Josh’s feet, just close
enough for him to get to it.

“Drink this,” he ordered through clenched teeth.
Tugging at his chain as if he expected it to suddenly shorten of its

own accord, Josh reached for the bottle. “What…?” Looking at it, he
frowned, visibly struggling to understand.

“Drink it,” Parker repeated tetchily. “It’s the only thing that can

help you.”

“But that’s—”
“Drink. It!” Parker shouted. Josh coiled back, clutching the bottle,

and reluctantly looked at it again. He picked at its sealed rim gingerly.

“I can’t open it,” he said timidly.
Parker let out an unpleasant snort. “You’ve got teeth, haven’t

you?”

Newborn 61

 

Josh ogled the bottle suspiciously then slowly raised it to his

mouth and bit it experimentally. His reaction was instant and purely
instinctive. As soon as his teeth had punctured the plastic and the first
droplets of blood touched his lips, he ripped into it. Parker watched
him drain the blood bottle with mixed feelings of disgust and
fascination. Josh’s fangs had finally made their existence known,
although Parker suspected that Josh himself had yet to become aware
of them.

“Want more?” he asked coldly when Josh had taken as much as he

could get out and seemed to consider tearing the bottle to shreds to get
at the few drops that were still caught inside it.

“Yes, please,” Josh whispered, relief and gratefulness heavy in the

two syllables. Parker wordlessly tossed him a second bottle. A third
and then a fourth followed, each one a visible contribution to
improving Josh’s pitiable state.

“Thank you,” Josh said at last. For the first time he dragged his

eyes off the bottle he was still holding and looked up at Parker, who
stared back at him with disgust. Bottle-feeding a half-starved newborn
vampire was a very messy matter indeed, he realised. But apparently
well worth it. Josh’s beauty had been fully restored in the few minutes
it had taken him to imbibe the blood, and there was a lovely, healthy
flush in his cheeks. He would have been stunning if it weren’t for the
dried blood on his lips and chin. Some had even ended up on his still
bare and now dirty chest. Suppressing a shudder, Parker threw a towel
at him. “Clean yourself up,” he said curtly.

Josh dabbed at his mouth a little uncertainly, but it wasn’t until he

noticed the blood on the towel that he seemed to fully realise what he
had done.

“Oh God, that was…” He dropped the towel and stared at Parker

with wide, horrified eyes.

“Blood, yes,” Parker replied coldly. “Human blood, to be

precise.”

Looking at the bottles, Josh groaned. “What have I done?”

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“What’s in your nature to do.”
“But I didn’t mean to…h–human blood?”
“I told you. It’s the only thing that helps you, so you’d better get

used to it soon.”

Josh was still staring at him with those terrified eyes. “What am

I?”

“You’re a vampire,” Parker explained nastily.
“But they…vampires don’t exist.”
“I think you know better than that after what happened in that old

house. Feel your teeth if you want further evidence.”

“My teeth?” Josh asked, uncomprehending, but he gingerly ran his

tongue across the ridges of his front teeth. He flinched when its silky
tissue caught on the tip of his left canine. Parker could see the blood
ooze from the cut in the fragment of a second it took Josh to react and
close his mouth.

“How is that possible?” Josh whispered almost unintelligibly, as

he was clearly trying to avoid getting his tongue anywhere near his
fangs again.

Parker shrugged. He had started gathering up the empty bottles

and watched Josh’s every motion from the corners of his eyes, but
there was nothing to worry about. Attack was clearly the last thing on
Josh’s mind. “I have absolutely no idea. All I know is that vampires
are real. And evil,” he added, full of spite.

“I’m not evil!” Josh protested. “I wouldn’t even have drunk that if

I’d known it was blood. Human, at that.” A shudder went through
him. “Gosh, I still don’t know what got into me. How could I drink
that?”

“Josh. I’ve met quite a few vampires, and in my experience, every

single one of your kind is evil.” Parker sighed. “And you knew what
was in those bottles the moment you opened the first. You drank it
anyway. And you will drink it again.”

Josh swallowed nervously. “I just couldn’t seem to stop,” he

admitted shamefully.

Newborn 63

 

“I told you. It’s in your nature,” Parker replied and turned away,

but Josh’s voice stopped him again. “So what now? Will I still have to
stay here?” There was a shrill note of panic in his words.

“You’ll stay here until I know what to do with you.”
“Parker, please. Let me out. I promise I’ll be good. Just please,

don’t make me stay in this awful basement. It’s dirty, cold and—”

“Sor–ry,” Parker interrupted him nastily. “I didn’t have time to

redecorate. You’ll have to just live with it. Don’t worry, you’re not
gonna freeze to death. You won’t even catch a cold. I promise.”

“But it’s dark and I’m lonely and…and I’m scared,” Josh admitted

in an awkward squeak.

“Scared?” Parker laughed cruelly. “For heaven’s sake, Josh,

you’re one of the most dangerous predators this fucking planet has
ever seen. What could you possibly be scared of? Rats? They won’t
harm you. Quite the opposite. You could try to catch one. That would
help you pass the time, and I’m sure they’d make a nice snack. For
the likes of you, anyway.”

Josh had flinched at his words and was looking at him with hurt in

his eyes. “Right now I’m scared of you,” he said quietly.

“Good.” Parker nodded. “You should be, because I can harm you.

A lot. You will stay here. No way am I letting you anywhere I don’t
have you one hundred percent under control.”

“Please, Parker! Don’t—” Parker slammed the heavy steel door

shut, efficiently silencing Josh’s desperate pleas. Leaning against it,
he rested his head on its solid cold surface. Just why hadn’t he killed
the vampire—Josh—when he’d been about to? It would have been so
much easier. Now he had a newborn vampire at his hands. He sighed.
A vampire that was scared of the dark. This unexpected vulnerability
had got to him more than he dared admit even to himself. He knew he
couldn’t lock him up in the basement indefinitely, but what other
options did he have apart from the obvious one?

* * * *

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“Josh? Breakfast,” Parker announced when he opened the steel

door the next morning.

Josh was huddled up in his corner and stared at him defiantly. He

looked more of a mess than Parker had noticed the day before. There
were cobwebs and crumbs of dirt in his hair, and dust had gathered on
his face, turning his skin a dull grey. His cheeks were smeared with
what looked like mud. So he had been crying. Parker swallowed,
touched against his will.

“Thank you, but I’d rather not,” Josh said hollowly.
“Don’t be stupid. You need it.”
“So what? I don’t want it. It only makes you hate me more.”
“It doesn’t…” Perceptive little bastard. Parker tried again.

“Starving yourself won’t change what you are. It will only make you
more aggressive after a while.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter, does it?” Josh snapped back. “I’m

chained to a wall and locked up behind a steel door, in a fucking
basement! I’m not gonna hurt anyone. You’ve seen to that.”

“Look, I’m sorry about that,” Parker said. “Feed, and we’ll talk,

okay?” He held out the blood bottle. When Josh didn’t take it, he
placed it on the floor in front of him.

“Feed,” he repeated sternly. “I need you to be in a good mood.”

No point trying to talk to a cranky vampire. Not that there was much
point trying to talk to a happy one. The ones he’d met had been just as
inclined to trying to rip out his throat when in a good mood. Maybe
even more so.

Josh let out a sarcastic chuckle. “What for?”
Parker took a breath. “I’m going to let you out.” He held up his

hands when Josh jerked his head up hopefully. “There are conditions,
though.”

“Which?”
“First—you feed.” Parker pointed at the bottle. It took an

encouraging nod from him for Josh to pick it up. He looked at Parker

Newborn 65

 

with an expression of surprised delight. Parker had filled the blood
into a screw-top plastic bottle and even warmed it a bit. It probably
tasted better than straight from the fridge, although it was still below
body temperature. One of his assumptions about vampires was that
the warmer the blood they drank was, the more energy it delivered,
and he didn’t want Josh to come to his full strength too soon.

Josh gingerly raised the bottle to his lips and took a cautious first

sip. He sighed appreciatively and took another. Parker waited
patiently for him to finish, noticing that Josh tried to turn away from
him, as if Parker watching him feed was making him uncomfortable.

“Better?” Parker asked when Josh put the bottle away.
Josh wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before he

answered. “Yes. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now, the conditions. I’ll let you out of the

basement, but you’ll stay inside the house. I’ll be watching you very
closely, and should you try to escape, it’s back to the basement for
you—without another chance at ever getting out again, got that?”

Josh nodded meekly.
“You’ll wear this.”
“What is it?”
“A collar with an electronic tag. A bit adapted to meet, um, my

requirements. You won’t be able to take it off but I’ll know it if you
try and if you do—back to the basement.”

“Okay.”
“Good. Hold out your wrists.”
“My wrists?” Josh frowned. “I thought you’d said it was a collar.

Aren’t they usually worn around the neck?”

“They are, and you will, but I’m going to put handcuffs on you

first. I’m not taking any more risks than I have to. Now hold out your
hands.”

Visibly reluctant, Josh did as he was told. Parker slipped the cuffs

around his wrists and activated the electronic lock.

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“I see.” Josh gave his ties an experimental tug. There was just

enough slack for him to do simple things like drink from a bottle, but
they would hinder him a lot if he tried to fight.

“Now the collar. This is a bit trickier, so don’t move.” Holding it

up, Parker hesitated. He couldn’t just put it on Josh without him
knowing the full significance of it.

“This collar doesn’t just include a tagging system,” he explained.

“It’s filled with an explosive. If you try to take it off, it’ll blow up. If
you leave the house and a radius of five feet around it, it’ll blow up. If
you attack me—”

“It’ll blow up. I get the gist,” Josh said dryly. “So, uh, vampires

are not immortal, then?”

Parker heaved a sigh. “No, not immortal. Just very, very hard to

kill. But blasting them up has never failed me yet. Still want me to put
this on you?”

Josh shrugged. “I haven’t got much choice, have I? I do want to

get out of this crypt. One question though. You said it would go off if
I attacked you—wouldn’t that kill you, too?”

“It would,” Parker confirmed levelly. “But that’s nothing I’m

worried about. I’ve been living close to death for more than a decade
now.”

“Oh. That’s what you were talking about the other day, right?”
“Right. Now try not to move. I really don’t want this to blow up in

my face just because I didn’t activate it correctly.”

Josh didn’t move a muscle while Parker fastened the collar around

his neck.

“I see you have stopped breathing,” Parker observed as he stepped

back.

“It seemed pointless,” Josh said evenly. “Apparently I don’t need

the oxygen, and since I have to actually concentrate on breathing, I
might as well not. It’s not as though I have appearances to keep up,
after all.”

Newborn 67

 

Parker nodded. “True. One more thing.” He held up another

plastic item. “A Taser. Should you try to do anything you’re not
supposed to do, this will be the means to stop you. It won’t kill you,
but it is very effective and, I think, quite painful, so you’d better not
make me use it. Remember, I’ve been dealing with your kind for a
long time, and I know how to take…them out.”

“I’ll be good. I promise,” Josh said earnestly.
“I sincerely hope so,” Parker replied. “Else it’s—”
“The basement, I know.”
“You’re a fast learner. Good. Now let me undo the chain.” Parker

leaned in and opened the lock, holding the Taser ready, and aimed at
Josh’s throat. The shackle hit the floor with a loud metallic clang,
making Josh jump in fright. Parker increased the pressure of the Taser
to Josh’s neck.

“Easy,” he warned.
“I’m sorry!” Josh squealed. “I just…oh, I guess I’m a bit

nervous.”

“It’s okay, but you might not want to make any sudden

movements when I’m near you. Next time I won’t hesitate to use it.”

“Sorry.”
“Come on now. I’ll take you upstairs.”
Parker made Josh lead the way, steering him with his voice as he

took him to the ground floor. “You can move around here, but don’t
forget the rules.”

“I won’t.” Josh took a few tentative steps around the unfamiliar

building, exploring his surroundings with wide eyes. Once again
wondering why on earth he was letting a vampire run free inside his
own home, Parker watched him closely. As before, there was no
malice and no threat in Josh’s motions. There were only the easy,
natural grace and the sweet, youthful innocence and curiosity Parker
had adored in him from the very moment they’d met. Seeing Josh
move in the light of day, the memories of their time together became

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stronger than ever, and Parker could have easily forgotten what had
happened in between.

Josh stopped in front of him. “You have a nice home.”
“Thank you.”
Josh looked down at his dirty hands and dusty, bloodstained, bare

torso and jeans self-consciously.

“Um, may I use the bathroom and wash? Please?” he asked in a

small voice. “I feel filthy, and I think I, uh, smell.”

Parker couldn’t help smiling. Josh really was a cute thing. “Go

ahead. In fact, you can take a shower if you want. Your collar is
waterproof.”

“Okay. Good to know. I’m assuming you won’t want to take the

handcuffs off me, though, so it might be a bit tricky.”

Parker frowned then let out a sigh. He’d started it so he might as

well go through with it. “Come here. Promise you’ll behave?”

“I will.”
Wondering once again what was possessing him to put his faith in

a vampire, Parker unlocked the handcuffs. “I’ll find you some clothes.
Remember, five feet around the house and you won’t get a warning.”

“I won’t need one,” Josh said softly and went to the bathroom.

Two minutes later, Parker could hear the sound of the shower. Trying
not to think about Josh’s adorable naked body under the steaming jet
of water, he set off to fetch something to wear for his own personal
pet vampire.

Ten minutes later he was planning to take a shower himself and

make it a cold one. Josh had emerged from the bathroom with nothing
but a towel around his narrow hips, and Parker could barely take his
eyes off him. The changes in him were almost imperceptible but
created an enormous overall effect. Ridiculously beautiful even before
he had acquired the enhanced attractiveness of a vampire, Josh now
looked quite simply breathtaking. His body still hadn’t lost the last of
its boyish leanness, but his posture was no longer that of a self-

Newborn 69

 

conscious adolescent. The easy, graceful way he held himself hinted
at an enormous physical strength.

Parker swallowed. He could only hope that Josh wasn’t going to

test that newfound power in his presence.

“Here,” he grumbled, pushing a pile of clothing into Josh’s hands.

“Try them on. They might be a bit loose, but they’ll have to do. I
didn’t have time to go clothes shopping.”

“Thank you.” Josh selected a pair of jeans and a jersey at random

and, without any more ado, dropped the towel to put them on. He
didn’t comment on the lack of underwear, and Parker was too busy
with his own suddenly too tight briefs to be willing to go back and get
some.

“You still need to fill out a bit,” he observed when Josh was

dressed. “But not quite as much as I thought you would have to.”
Rather than being at least three sizes too large as expected, Parker’s
clothes fit him astonishingly well.

“Yes, well, apparently some things have changed about my body,”

Josh deadpanned.

“I wasn’t joking.”
“Neither am I. I’m glad that I can still see myself in the mirror,

though. It would suck having to shave without one.”

“What else has changed apart from your dress size?” Parker asked

curiously. He had learned quite a lot about vampires over the years by
observing them on the hunt, but having the chance to ask one was so
much better.

Josh frowned. “My vision. It’s amazing, really. At first I thought

you had one of those fancy showerheads until I figured out that
everything has a different colouring depending on the temperature.”

“You can see the temperature?” That was a surprise. Parker had

been suspecting that vampires could gather a lot more information
about their surroundings than a human, but heat-sensitive vision
wasn’t among the things he’d been expecting. “What else?”

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“My hearing. Did you know your neighbour cheats on her

husband?”

“Cindy? No, I didn’t, but…they live almost half a mile away.”
“Do they? Well, uh, it sounded more like she was outside, taking a

walk with someone. And the window was open, so it’s not all that
extraordinary that I could hear them.” Josh sighed. “Look, I’m still
just finding things out myself. I’ve no idea what I can or can’t do yet.
In fact, I think right now you know far more about vampires than I.”

Parker nodded. “I probably do.”
“Are you going to tell me?”
“Well, most of what I know has to do with how to take one out.

Are you sure that’s what you want to hear?”

Josh pulled a face, but his voice was soft when he asked, “What

happened to make you hate us so much?”

“Us? You’re adapting fast,” Parker observed bitterly.
Josh shrugged. “There isn’t much point denying it, is there? The

truth is, down there in the basement I didn’t believe you at first, but
I’ve had time to think since. You’re right. I’ll just have to get used to
it, and I suppose that the faster I do that the sooner I will know what
not to do. So are you going to tell me?”

“You want me to tell you what happened?” Parker let out an

irritable snort. “Vampires killed off my entire family, that’s what
happened.”

Josh’s eyes softened. He reached out for Parker’s hand but,

checking himself, stopped about two inches short of actually touching
him. “Do you want to tell me more?”

“Not really, no,” Parker grumbled. “But after all, you’re basically

in this awful mess because of what happened back then, so I guess
you have the right to know. Just let us go through to the living room. I
guess we might as well get comfortable for this conversation.”

They settled down, Josh tactfully choosing a place at the furthest

possible distance to Parker, apparently aware of how hard it must be
for Parker to be so close to a creature he’d come to despise.

Newborn 71

 

“I used to be a cop,” Parker began his story reluctantly. “I was

young, only a little older than you are now, and had only just started.
One of my first cases was a homicide. It was a young woman, barely
more than a girl. She’d been killed in a dark, stinking alley, and
everybody assumed the obvious, that she was just a hooker who’d had
trouble with her pimp, so no one bothered running a proper
investigation. We were dealing with several cases of teenagers who
had gone missing, so her case was considered relatively unimportant
by comparison. But I just couldn’t let it rest. I started digging deeper
into it, and soon I found out that there were several cases a lot like
this one, and all of them were still unsolved. I suspected it to be a
serial killer, but my boss said it were all just coincidences, and I
suppose from his point of view, he was justified to think so. Then,
well, one thing led to another, and eventually I discovered what we
were really dealing with. A gang of vampires had settled down in our
area, and they were taking their pick among the people.” He paused,
watching the impact his narrative had on Josh. A frown creased his
forehead, but he seemed eager to hear more, so Parker continued.

“All those teenagers we were searching for were simply those

victims they had bothered hiding so they wouldn’t leave too many
corpses in their wake. I tried to warn people off without saying what
was really going on. I’d tried telling my boss about it, but his reaction
made it clear that if I continued claiming there were vampires, I’d not
only be out of the force, but in a closed ward as well. So I spread a
few rumours about there being, indeed, a serial killer, and that worked
to a certain extent. People were being more careful, and we had less
disappearances and fewer deaths. But I wanted more. I wanted the
vampires not only out of town, I wanted them gone forever, so I’d
started pursuing them, and I think I must have come close. One night,
one of them tracked me down in an alley and told me to back off or
they’d make me regret it.” He closed his eyes when the memories
started welling up.

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“Sometimes I think I should’ve listened. Just turn a blind eye like

everybody else and get on with my life, but at the time I couldn’t, so I
kept chasing after them. When I was close to tracking them down,
they found a way to put me off. I came home one night, and they had
killed my entire family—my parents, my little sister, all of them. I
knew right away what had happened, that they had done it, even
though they had made it look like a break-in gone wrong. Shortly
after that I quit the force and have been hunting the bastards since.”

Josh didn’t say anything for a long time. He was almost

completely motionless. Only his dark gaze wandered aimlessly
around the room. “I’m sorry,” he whispered eventually in a rough
voice.

“It’s not your fault,” Parker pointed out, grateful for having had

the chance to gather his composure again.

“No, it’s not, but that doesn’t mean I can’t feel for you, does it?

What happened to you is horrible, and I don’t know what I would do
if it happened to me and my family—oh.” Josh fell silent. An anxious
expression was clouding his face.

“They’re okay,” Parker answered the unspoken question softly. “It

was just you those bastards were after.” He took a breath. “Just you,
because they knew you were important to me. Don’t forget that this is
about me, not about you. You were just a means to get their message
across.”

“Oh. I see.” Josh swallowed.
“I think I’m the one who should be sorry,” Parker added

tonelessly. “And I am. Believe me, I am. I wish I could turn back the
time but I can’t. What happened happened, and now we both have to
deal with it.”

“Deal with it?” Josh repeated in an equally hollow tone. “How am

I supposed to deal with this? What am I supposed to do now?” He let
out a choked sound, a curious mix between a snort and a sniff. “If
you’ll ever let me out of this house again, that is.”

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It seemed he knew better than to ask Parker directly what the plan

was. Parker was glad he didn’t, because, in all honesty, he didn’t
really have a plan. Not beyond letting poor, frightened, and dirty Josh
out of the basement with all the safety measures he could possibly
take and then see how it went. Now Josh was cleaned up and sitting
on his sofa. The vampire was out of his prison, and Parker didn’t
know what to do with him. He could hardly send him back to the
basement and lock him up again, could he? It would be cruel, and
Josh deserved better than being locked up. He was behaving well, and
the more time Parker spend just sitting around talking to him, the less
he was able to detect the vampire in Josh. All he saw when he looked
at the man sitting across from him was his lover. The sweet, innocent
boy who had given him everything he had to offer.

How could it be that just a few days ago Parker had held that

smooth, youthful body close, had explored its pleasure zones in
between showering Josh with kisses, and now he could barely stand to
be in the same room? And yet, with every minute he spent in Josh’s
company, with every glance he stole at him, he could feel their bond
grow again. The magical flame of attraction, love, even, that had been
gleaming between them right from the start, was sparking up again
and rekindling into a slow but persistent burn somewhere deep inside
Parker’s heart.

“I did mean it, you know,” Josh said suddenly.
Parker jerked up from his gloomy thoughts. “Mean what?”
“That I love you.”
Oh, God, please…“Josh—”
Josh huffed derisively. “What? Are you going to tell me again that

I can’t fall in love because I’m young? We’ve had that conversation
before, and I’m telling you now just as I told you then, that I love
you.”

“Oh, Josh,” Parker sighed. “You’ve no idea what you’re talking

about. Yes, you are just a kid, and there’s so much you have yet to
learn. But that’s not all that stands between us, and you know it.”

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Josh’s temper calmed as quickly as it had flared up. He nodded.

“Yes, I know. I know you hate me right now. There isn’t much I can
do about it, but I just want you to know that for me, things haven’t
changed. I’m still me, and I still love you, regardless of what’s
happened in the meantime. Please just remember that. No matter how
this is going to end, I will always love you. I know you can only see
the vampire I have become, but that is not everything I am. I’m still
the same old Josh.”

“Uh-huh.” Parker gave a noncommittal shrug. He got up and went

to the drinks cabinet. “Care for a drink?” he asked casually, pouring
himself a large whisky. Josh ogled the bottle uncomfortably. “I, um,
don’t really drink alcohol.”

“No? Come on, don’t tell me you haven’t tried it yet.”
“I have, but I just don’t like it.” No, of course not.
Parker smiled pleasantly. “Anything else? Milk perhaps?”
Promptly, Josh’s eyes went wide with enthusiasm. “I’d love some.

If it’s not too much trouble.” He seemed nervous and shifted a little,
as if he wasn’t sure whether he was asking too much of his host.

“No, not at all. Hot or cold?”
“Uh, cold is fine.”
Parker nodded. “I’ll be back in a minute.”
A few moments later, he put a glass of fresh, cold milk into Josh’s

hand and clinked his own to it. “Enjoy.” He winked and smiled
encouragingly.

Returning the smile, Josh put the glass to his lips and took a

mouthful. He swallowed and hummed appreciatively. “Mmh, that’s
really—” Milk spilled everywhere as the glass shattered on the floor.
Hissing and spitting, Josh fled into the far corner of the room where
he stood, trembling. His face was distorted into a grimace of pure
disgust. Parker had never even seen him move, but he would have
sworn that Josh had reached the wall before the glass had broken.

“What was that?” Josh snarled viciously, and Parker had to fight

the instinct to delve for the next available weapon. Long, a flawless

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white, and without a doubt lethally sharp, Josh’s fangs were an
unmistakable presence in his mouth. Parker swallowed and forced his
voice to sound far steadier than he felt. “Milk. Just as you wanted.”

“That’s not milk!” Josh snapped and then he growled. Yes, he

actually growled. The sound made the hairs on Parker’s neck stand on
end.

“It is,” he said, struggling to regain his composure. “You just

can’t stand it anymore. So much for how you’re still the same old
Josh.”

Josh’s eyes narrowed. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”
Parker nodded mutely.
“Why?”
“Why?” Parker repeated, thrown a little off track by the simplicity

of the question and the honest incomprehension with which it was
delivered. “Because you need to understand that you are not the same
old Josh anymore. Did you really think you could act like nothing had
changed? You have changed, Josh, and whatever you say, things
between us have changed. Everything has changed,” he added
bitterly.

“Yes, that much is obvious,” Josh snarled. “Just tell me, is it me

who you wanted to realise what I am, or you who needed reminding?”

Caught off guard by the sudden accusation, Parker stared at him

blankly. “I don’t need reminding,” he grumbled. “I know what you
are, and I couldn’t forget it if I wanted to. Fuck, a fortnight ago I was
going to kill you.”

“A fortnight? Two whole weeks? Is that how long you locked me

up for?” Josh still sounded uncharacteristically reproachful.

“Yes. Although the turning process alone took up more than half a

day.”

“Were you there when…when it happened?” The bitterness that

had crept into Josh’s voice was still there, a reminder of his
sufferings.

“The turning? Yes, I was. For a part of it, that is.”

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“Huh.” Josh nodded pensively. “I don’t remember much of it.”
“That’s probably for the best. I don’t think it’s something you’d

want to remember.”

“No, you’re right.” Josh held his gaze steadily. “I wouldn’t. I do

remember enough to know that much. What I also remember is that it
hurt a lot and that I’ve never felt so lonely in my entire life.”

Of everything he could have said, those were the words that hurt

Parker the most. It was the only part of Josh’s torment he could have
eased. It had been in his power to make at least that element a little
less unbearable, but he had been too much of a coward to overcome
his own fears and see Josh through his horrors. Unable to stand the
unspoken disappointment in those soft-brown eyes, Parker averted his
face. He felt beyond dreadful all of a sudden. He had seen what Josh
had been going through, had witnessed his agony, and regardless of
what excuses he had come up with so readily at the time, he had
known that Josh would have appreciated the presence of someone,
helpful or not.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, full of shame. “I just couldn’t—”
“It’s okay,” Josh interrupted him in an unexpectedly gentle tone.

“I understand.” Judging by the compassion in his eyes, he understood
indeed. Parker sighed. How could it be that Josh was all sympathetic
forgiveness even though he was the one who had lost his life and been
catapulted into a reality he hadn’t even known existed?

“Anyway, there’s no point crying over spilled milk,” Josh added

lightly. “Speaking of which—I think I ought to clean that up before
the stink gets any worse.” He indicated the puddle of drying milk with
a brief jerk of his head.

“No, it’s okay,” Parker said. “I’ll get it.”
“But I can—”
“You can’t even stand the sight of it,” Parker cut across him with

a smirk. “Besides, it hasn’t even started to smell yet.”

“Not?” Josh frowned.
Parker shook his head. “Not to me, anyway.”

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“Oh.” Josh’s frown deepened. “I suppose there are some things

I’ll still have to get used to.”

“Quite a lot of them, I should think,” Parker said and got up to

fetch a bowl of water and a cloth.

“Can I ask you something?” Josh asked shyly when Parker

returned. He hadn’t left his place in the corner of the room.

“Sure.” Parker shrugged and knelt on the floor to clean up the

mess.

“Will I never be able to drink anything other than…blood?”

Josh’s voice dropped to a whisper on the last word.

“I’m not one hundred percent sure,” Parker admitted. “I’ve seen

vampires drink ordinary beverages. I think they did it to blend in, but
I don’t really know how they did it. Maybe it’s something you can
make yourself get used to.”

“Get used to that?” Josh eyed the milk in open disgust.
“Maybe you should start with water,” Parker suggested.
“Hm. Well, maybe you’re right, but I don’t think I’ll try it any

time soon.”

“You can come back over here, by the way. I promise the milk

won’t attack you.”

Josh shot him a doubtful glance but left his corner, albeit

reluctantly.

“I don’t suppose there’s any point in even asking about solid

foods, is there?” he said, inching his way closer but still watching
Parker scrub the floor from a safe distance.

Grinning, Parker looked up. “I’ve never seen a vampire eat, if

that’s what you mean, but you never know. Maybe you should try it.
There’s a first time for everything.”

A shudder ran through Josh’s body. “Unghh. No, thanks. I don’t

feel particularly experimental right now.”

“Well, you don’t have to try any of it. Drinks, food, it doesn’t

matter. You’d really only need it to blend in, but that’s nothing you
have to worry about while you’re with me. I—ouch, fuck!” Parker

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stared at his hand in shocked wonder. Deep-red liquid poured from a
cut in his palm, left by a piece of glass that must have got caught in
the cloth. Frozen by surprise, he watched in fascination as drops fell
to the freshly wiped floor, leaving bright-red splashes on the pristine
white of the tiles. It took him embarrassingly long to become aware of
his precarious situation. Bleeding, on his knees and on the floor, the
Taser carelessly out of reach on the sofa, he knew he didn’t stand a
chance to get out of this scenario alive. He braced himself, ready to
push the panic button and trigger the explosion that would wipe them
both out. His only consolation was that it would be over fast, and he
would take the vampire with him. Any second now.

“Are you okay?” Josh’s concerned voice broke through to him.

“Want me to get you something to put on it? Do you have a first-aid
kit around somewhere?”

“Wh–what?” Parker stammered, looking up. Josh hovered at a

safe distance, watching Parker’s hand and the blood that oozed from it
with mild interest and a bit of concern, but nothing else.

“Your wound. If the glass is out, you should press something on it

to stop the bleeding,” Josh explained levelly. “A clean towel will do if
you haven’t got any bandages. I’ll fetch you one if you tell me where
I can find it.”

Parker stared at Josh in amazement. Was he really getting lectured

on first aid by a vampire? Helplessly, Parker gave in to the laughter
that suddenly bubbled up inside him, much to Josh’s astonishment.
Poor thing. Parker had been close to blowing them up into a million
pieces, while all Josh had had in mind was helping him stop the
bleeding.

“There are bandages in the left-hand drawer of the cabinet in the

bathroom,” Parker said, stifling another fit of giggles.

“Okay, I’ll get them.” With another bewildered glance at Parker,

Josh shuffled off. He returned a few moments later with a couple of
bandages. “Want me to take a look or…?” he offered.

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Parker stared at him, considering the options. He couldn’t really

dress the wound properly himself, and Josh seemed to know what he
was talking about, but—could he risk letting a vampire anywhere near
his bleeding wound? “Uh, I don’t know. Think you can stand it?” The
question made Parker uncomfortable, but he had to ask.

Letting out a soft snorting sound, Josh approached him, once

again amazing Parker with the easy grace of his movements.

“Let me see,” Josh ordered gently.
Very reluctantly, Parker held out his hand, wondering yet again

what was possessing him. Clasping the trigger button with his
unharmed hand, he watched Josh’s face closely. Time and experience
had taught him to know when a vampire was about to attack.
Extended fangs were always an unmistakable sign, but Josh’s
luscious, invitingly curved lips didn’t show a hint of the characteristic
bumps. Parker almost jumped in fright when Josh looked up at him
and opened the mouth Parker had been watching so intently.

“You can let go of the trigger now,” he said calmly. “I’m not

going to bite you.”

“O–okay,” Parker stammered. Stammered, for heaven’s sake. He

never stammered. He didn’t usually flinch, either, but when Josh
brushed his hand with soft fingers, he couldn’t help the spasm of
muscles that pulled it back to avoid the touch. Josh didn’t try to hold
him, just kept the contact by smoothly following Parker’s motion. It
was barely more than a whisper of a touch, but to Parker it felt like
the relentless grip of a vice. Josh’s skin was dry and cool, just that
little bit below normal human body temperature that had Parker’s hair
stand on edge.

“It’s not too bad,” Josh said softly. His grip tightened as he started

applying a pressure bandage. When he was finished, he released
Parker’s hand from his hold.

“That should stop the bleeding for now, although you probably

ought to see a doctor. I’m not sure, but you might need stitches.”

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“Okay. Thanks,” Parker said numbly. “What?” For a moment Josh

had looked as if he was going to say something else, but he merely let
out the breath he’d taken in a sigh and turned away.

“Isn’t it hard for you?” Parker couldn’t help asking.
“What?”
“The blood. You know, the sight, the smell.”
Josh glanced at him with a curious expression in his eyes. “What

do you think? Just because it is what I apparently need to live on, I
turn into some out-of-control monster as soon as someone pricks their
finger in my presence? What’s it like for you when you have, say, a
juicy steak in front of you? Do you lose all control and just slam your
teeth into it? Besides, I’ve eaten barely an hour ago in case you
forgot. I’m not hungry.” He frowned. “Or thirsty or whatever you call
it.”

“Hm.” Parker watched him thoughtfully, considering the

questions. “I guess I understand what you mean. I just always
thought…oh, I don’t know. It’s hard to tell if a vampire attacks you
because he’s hungry or because he just wants to kill you for the sake
of killing you, if all they ever do is attack and try to kill.”

“Is that really the way they—it is?”
“In my experience, yes. I don’t think I’ve ever spent as much as a

minute in one room with a vampire without fighting.”

“I see. And was it always them who started the fight?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Just asking.” Josh shrugged in perfect calm.
“I, uh, well…no,” Parker admitted. No, it usually was him who

started the fight. As soon as he had identified a vampire, his only goal
was to destroy him. Or her.

“Have you ever tried to talk to one?”
“What would I do that for?”
“To find out what they’re like when not in mortal danger.”
“Again, what would I do that for?”

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Josh snatched a breath and exhaled it on a sigh. “Come on, Parker.

You know where I’m headed with this. Every being would try to
defend themselves when threatened with death. You can’t blame
vampires for being well equipped for a fight and protecting
themselves.”

“I’m not!” Parker protested, not liking where this conversation

was headed. Josh, with his serene logic, was going to seriously twist
his arm sooner or later.

“Aren’t you?” Josh asked in a much gentler tone. “Look, as much

as I understand your personal, uh, reasons—what happened with your
family was truly horrifying, and I don’t know what I’d do if that
happened to me and my family. But I refuse to believe that all
vampires are alike, just as not all humans are alike. You’re a sensible
man, Parker, and I’m sure you can see the truth in that. Humans do
and always have committed the most atrocious crimes, far worse than
anything any other species has ever done to their own kind, and still
you don’t run around killing off all humans because some of them
have—”

“All right, shut up, I fucking get it!” Parker yelled, suddenly

unable to hold back any longer. “Yes, you’re right. Humans do
commit crimes. Some of them do, and most of them don’t, but when I
look at a fellow human being, I don’t usually find a snarling, biting
monster staring back at me.”

Josh held his gaze levelly as he answered, “What do you see when

you look at me?”

“W–what?” Parker asked, confused.
“What do you see when you look at me? Have I ever snarled at

you? Ever tried to bite you? Not as far as I remember, and I think we
both agree on the fact that I am one of them, don’t we?”

“Yes, but…oh, for fuck’s sake, I really can’t deal with this now.”
Josh had flinched at Parker’s shout but his voice was still firm.

“Parker, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m just trying to
understand, okay?”

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“Why, oh why the fuck do you have to be so fucking reasonable

and mature about this whole thing? You’re a goddamn vampire, don’t
you get that into your brain?” Parker shouted at the top of his voice.
“What is it with you? You should be the one being mad and yelling,
not trying to explain to me about political correctness.”

“But what’s the point in yelling? I want to understand, and I want

you to understand. It’s the only way we have to get out of the mess
we’re in and find a way to make this work in spite of everything that
has happened,” Josh explained, still with that unnerving calm. Really,
how old was that boy? Shy and inexperienced as he had been
sexually, he seemed to be mature enough to join the diplomatic corps
when it came to interpersonal relationships.

“Make what work exactly?” Parker asked acidly, finding a grim

relief when Josh at last looked uncertain.

“Us,” Josh answered, sounding less confident but still meeting

Parker’s eyes with admirable, stubborn determination.

“Us?” Parker repeated, his anger gearing back up to full throttle.

“What makes you think there is still anything like an us? You are a
vampire! You’re the last creature on earth I want anywhere near me.
Get that into your thick skull, will you? Fuck, I should have killed you
off down there like all the others. Or maybe I should have just left you
to rot. See how long it takes for a vampire to starve to death—if that
ever happens at all.”

Parker had crossed the line. He knew it the instant the words were

out. In a way it was a relief. In a way. In reality, and for the most part,
it hurt. It hurt to see the pain burn in Josh’s eyes, to see the soft curve
of his mouth set in a hard line, and to see his chest heave with a breath
he hadn’t snatched to speak.

There was no way for Parker to take the words back, even if he’d

wanted to, and he wasn’t sure that he did. The one thing he was sure
of, though, was that he couldn’t go on living with Josh. He’d made
himself believe he could make it work, that what little of a plan he
had stood a chance to work, but he had failed in less than an hour. The

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truth was Parker simply couldn’t stand the sight of Josh, and he
couldn’t stand being reminded of everything this beautiful young man
stood for. The memories of his family were bad enough. Witnessing
his lover turning into one of them and walking around, like a monster
in a harmless shell, and the ever-present reminder of Parker’s guilt,
was impossible to put up with. In all likelihood, it would drive him
insane before the day was over. Parker knew that it was either that or
killing Josh after all.

“Come here,” he said gruffly. Josh wasn’t to blame for not doing

as he was told. Watching Parker with suspicious eyes, he remained
where he was. Parker noticed that he looked paler than before, his
earlier remarkable calm at last having vanished. He had already
learned to be suspicious, and he was right to be.

“Come here,” Parker repeated and added, “I’m not gonna hurt

you. Not now, anyway. Come here.”

Josh took a few hesitant steps to him, still watching Parker warily.

Strangely, it came as a relief when Parker was beginning to see the
vampire in Josh surface at long last. He wasn’t set on attack, but his
senses were alert and his body was ready for a fight. Giveaway bumps
were bulging his lips, and his pupils were contracted to the size of
tiny black dots to block out as much sunlight as they could. The angle
at which he held his head, and the smooth, easy grace with which he
moved—it was ridiculously plain to see now. Josh had become a
predator, an incredibly strong, potentially lethal thing that could kill
Parker in less than a second with nothing more than what nature had
given him.

“You’re still wearing the collar. Don’t forget that,” Parker

reminded.

“Oh, I know,” Josh snarled back. He flinched when his lip caught

on one of his half extended fangs. He clearly needed some practise
speaking with them.

Watching Josh self-consciously lick the blood off his lip, Parker

held up his hand. “That’s close enough,” he ordered, covering the rest

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of the distance himself so Josh ended up in a strategically good
position. Good for Parker, anyway, who would be able to seek refuge
in the adjoining room with no more than one long jump, provided that
he’d get the time for that long jump. If he didn’t, well, there was still
the collar.

“Don’t move now. For fuck’s sake, don’t move,” he warned as he

reached up and shakily fumbled with the collar’s lock mechanism. He
was immensely relieved when it obediently clicked open because he
had half expected to blow them both up. Maybe that would have
solved the problem, he thought bitterly. The words that spilled from
his mouth didn’t sound quite so bitter, he observed. More…resigned.
Miserable. “Go. Just leave, Josh. You’re free.”

Josh’s eyes were still gentle, but they widened with surprise.

“Huh? Why?”

Parker swallowed around the lump in his throat, but it wouldn’t go

away. Instead, it only added to the note of despair in his voice. “Just
go. Go and make sure I never see you again, ’cause next time I do,
I’m going to kill you. I swear I will.”

Josh’s gaze rested on him for another moment, as if searching his

face for something. What it was that he was looking for, and whether
he had found it or whether his vampire instincts were just kicking in
at last, Parker didn’t know. Either way, Josh was suddenly gone. In
the split second it had taken Parker to blink, he had disappeared,
stirring the air around them no more than a faint breeze and leaving
nothing that reminded of him. Nothing but the crippling pain in
Parker’s chest.

Parker didn’t know how long he remained there, simply staring at

nothing and wondering what might have been if things were different.
But they weren’t, he reminded himself miserably at last. Josh
Summers, gentle, kind, and innocent, and the only soul in a long time
Parker had come to care for, had even come close to falling in love
with, had died—or been turned into a monster, whichever way one
wanted to see it. And the only one to blame for it was Parker.

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Chapter 6

Three years later

Parker followed the vampire without looking back once. If the guy

had the information he said he had, it was well worth the risk of not
making it out of this meeting alive. Not that staying alive was high up
on the list of Parker’s priorities anyway. He was still telling himself
that his main goal in life was to take revenge or die trying, but deep
inside, he was aware that he had lost his grit somewhere along the
line. In fact, during the last months, the latter option had come to look
increasingly appealing. At least it would solve his problems, once and
for all.

“Where are you taking me?” he enquired, more to have something

to say than because he cared. He was memorising the way back on
autopilot, just as he was taking in his surroundings with an ease born
of years of practise.

His companion turned around, flashed his teeth in the mockery of

a smile, and walked right on. Walked might not have been the right
word. Parker was struggling to keep up with him, even though the
man seemed to barely be moving at all. That was vampires for you.

Stifling a sigh, Parker concentrated on not tripping up on the

uneven pavement of the narrow, unlit alley. The last thing he wanted
to happen was to end up on the floor with a grazed, bleeding hand. On
the floor with a cut in his hand, blood spilling…His memory flicked
back to that day several years ago. That one meaningful day at his
home when he had been on his knees, wiping up the spilled milk,
blood seeping from his hand and…it didn’t matter, did it? It didn’t

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matter that not a single day had passed since then without him
missing Josh, without him regretting what he had done. What he had
caused to happen. He’d kept trying to tell himself that it wasn’t his
fault ultimately, that he couldn’t have known they would go after
Josh, would use him as a way to make Parker pay and—He marched
straight into a very solid obstacle and, bouncing back, found himself
sitting on the floor, on his arse. The vampire towered over him,
chortling with amusement.

“Watch your step, huh?” He chuckled. “Anyway, here we are. The

guy you want to talk to is in there.” He jerked his head to indicate a
large house that might have been the home of a happy family a few
years ago. Now it looked pitiably uncared for. The lawn hadn’t been
tended to in weeks, possibly months, and the blinds were down. There
was a car and a motorbike parked in front of it, and it didn’t require
Parker’s level of experience to know that this was a perfect vampire’s
lair. The neighbourhood wasn’t exactly bad, but it looked like the
kind where people didn’t pay much attention to what their neighbours
did. Live and let die, so to speak.

“Thank you.” Parker reached into his pocket, not surprised when

the vampire tensed. He hadn’t lost his reputation yet, it seemed.

“What do I owe you?” Parker asked, ignoring the vampire’s

giveaway sign of discomfort. To his surprise, the vampire shook his
head.

“You don’t owe me anything, mate. You had a question. I had the

answer. It’s as easy as that.”

“Uh, oh. Thank you,” Parker said earnestly. After all the time that

had passed since he had started talking to vampires before killing
them, and sometimes even instead of, he still had the occasional
moment when he was surprised at just how…normal they were. If
bloodsucking monsters could ever be described as normal, he thought
grimly.

“Anyone in particular I should ask for?” he enquired.
“They’ll know. Just tell them what you want.”

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“Anything I should be aware of?”
A cold, almost cruel smile curled the vampire’s lips. “Just the

same as always when dealing with our kind—don’t stick your head
out too far.” The chuckle still rang in Parker’s ears when the vampire
himself had long since vanished.

Walking up the front steps, Parker took in some more details of

the house before he rang the doorbell. The door was opened soon, and
a friendly, if somewhat withered, face peered up at him.

“I’m here to…” Parker began but interrupted himself. To what?

Find a group of your kind to get a chance at killing them so I can
finally take revenge? Hm. Nice try, cowboy.

“I’m looking for someone,” he said instead. “And I’ve been

told—”

“Come in.”
Parker followed the beckoning of the old, gnarled figure inside the

house. As on the outside, the interior spoke of a good origin and
tended-for past, but looked like whoever had been in charge for the
past few years hadn’t bothered doing much anymore.

“Wait here.”
“What for?”
“Just wait.”
Ever one to be mistrusting, Parker hovered in the hall, keeping his

guard up while carefully taking stock of his surroundings. Not that he
expected it to be of any particular use to study the old-fashioned
wallpapers or the faded, moth-eaten, and dust-covered carpets, but
those were the only items around to catch his attention.

Eventually, he was so deeply absorbed in following the unusual

pattern in one of the small rugs that he didn’t notice at first when he
was no longer alone. It took a moment for him to realise that someone
had got into the room with him.

“Uh, hello,” Parker said, looking over his shoulder. He was

getting a little nervous after all. The truth was that he really hadn’t
noticed the vampire approach, and usually his well-trained sixth sense

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was triggered if one of them was near. Obviously not this time
though.

“Hello.” The vampire smiled back. It was an honest, open smile,

not that laconic twist of lips Parker had seen so often. Saw so often on
his fellow human beings. “So you wanted to see me?” he asked
pleasantly.

“Yes. Thank you for agreeing to meet me. I’m here to…well, uh,

I’m looking for information regarding some individuals of your kind,
and I was told that you might be able to help me.”

“Hmm. Who are you looking for?”
That was the question, really. Parker sighed. “I’m not sure who

they are. I mean, I know they’re vampires, obviously, but I don’t
know any names.” He sighed. “I don’t even know what they look like,
to be honest.”

“I see. You’re the one who’s seeking to take revenge, aren’t you?”
Parker’s stomach lurched painfully. “How do you know?” There

was no point in lying. If he was being honest, maybe the vampire in
front of him was going to at least keep talking to him. Chances were
he—it—was going to kill him afterward, but he’d already learned that
they were very good at sensing a lie. Especially the old, experienced
ones.

“You’re very right about that,” the vampire said as if he were

merely responding to a comment Parker had made. And some of them
can even get into your head. Well, Parker assumed they could, at least
the very powerful ones, so this one must be high up in the ranks.

“Don’t worry yourself with unimportant trivialities,” the vampire

said in an intriguingly gentle tone. “Yes, I am old, and yes, I have
powers that exceed those of most of my fellow vampires, but you
needn’t let that get to you. I have no wish to use my powers against
you. Quite the opposite, in fact. I am willing to help you.”

“You…what?”
“I would like to help you with your quest,” the vampire explained

smoothly. “But before I do, why don’t we sit down and have a drink?”

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He smiled, clearly in answer to the comment that he must have been
able to read in Parker’s eyes.

“I can guarantee you that nothing is further from my mind than

taking your blood or harming you in any way. You may feel safe in
my house as long as you take no initiative against me, or those under
my protection.”

“Those under…does that mean there are others here?” Parker

asked, craning his neck for a quick glance around. He hadn’t noticed
anyone else, and usually he was very good at sensing the presence of
both humans and vampires, but what his senses were telling him in
this house was close to nothing.

“I’m aware that this must be confusing for you, but fear not,

Parker.”

Parker jerked his head around to look at the vampire again so fast

it made him a little dizzy. “How do you know my name?”

A soft, husky chuckle escaped the vampire’s throat. “Do you

honestly believe I would let you into my home if I didn’t know
exactly who you are?”

“Um…probably not.”
The vampire smiled indulgingly. “No. Certainly not.”
“Fair enough.” Parker tried to maintain an air of confidence he

didn’t find in him anymore. And it was probably pointless searching
for it anyway, seeing as the vampire was apparently able to read him
like a book. There it was again. That soft smile that told him the
vampire knew what was going on inside his head.

“Listen, um. Isn’t this a bit impolite?” he asked tetchily. “All this

snooping around in my mind?”

“Ah, I’m not snooping.” The vampire looked mildly offended. “In

fact, I’m trying to ignore what your subconscious is telling me, but
it’s nearly impossible not to.”

“Oh. Um, well, sorry. I wasn’t aware of my subconscious telling

you stuff.”

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The vampire’s expression softened again. “No, of course not. So,

anyway, you have a reason for being here. That offer of drinks is still
valid, but I gather you’d prefer not to have them, or would you like
one now?” He waited for the second it took Parker to shake his head
and then continued, “I thought so. Now, those vampires you are
chasing. I understand they are the ones who killed your family,
right?”

Parker bit back a sigh. So the vampire really knew about him.

“Yes. Yes, my family,” he answered reluctantly. “And…” Suddenly,
Parker’s throat had gone too tight to speak. He cleared it, then said,
“And my…lover.”

Looking a little confused, the vampire stared at him, and he raised

his eyebrows. “Oh, right. I see. Yes, I suppose you would see it that
way.”

“See what what way?”
“That they have killed Josh.”
Parker flinched at hearing the name spoken out loud. The name

that had been with him every hour of every day and every night for
the past years. The name that had haunted him, along with the
beautiful, gentle face it belonged to. And yet, he was fairly certain he
hadn’t thought about it since he’d entered the strange old building.

“What…how do you know about Josh?” he asked warily.
For the second time, the vampire’s eyebrows went up in

bewilderment. “Huh?”

“How do you know about Josh?” Parker repeated, tensing and

trying to inconspicuously figure out which position would give him a
strategic advantage. Or rather, what to do to even stand a remote
chance at getting out alive. Something was off here, and in all
likelihood, he’d just walked straight into a trap.

Once again, the vampire’s lips twitched in gentle amusement. “It’s

nothing of that kind.”

“Damn, stop it, will you!” Parker snapped, adrenaline making him

forget his manners momentarily.

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Although he didn’t flinch, the vampire showed a first faint sign of

weariness. He let out a sigh. “I would love to. But I’m afraid that, as I
said, it is virtually impossible for me not to follow what you’re telling
me, especially when you’re in such a state of arousal.”

“I’m not in a—” Parker protested, but the vampire cut him off

with a lazy flick of his hand. As much as he hated it, Parker couldn’t
help but instinctively bend to the command.

“I understand your agitation, Parker,” the vampire said softly.

“And I believe I might have just what it takes to ease your worries a
little.”

“I don’t think so!” Parker snapped but fell silent when the door

was opened and in walked Josh.

Saying Josh looked breathtaking was an understatement. He

looked better than ever. The last time Parker had seen him, he’d been
a newborn vampire, just a few days old and still mostly in his human
form. Before that, he’d been a beautiful but wiry twenty-year-old
who’d still had some growing to do to fill his gangly frame.

Josh had definitely grown to fill his frame. He had also grown in

height, it seemed. At least another inch or so, which made him now
almost as tall as Parker was.

His broad shoulders curved into narrow hips, and Parker couldn’t

help but notice that the waistband of Josh’s jeans sat teasingly low.
He awkwardly dragged his eyes off the bulge at Josh’s groin but
couldn’t keep them from following the taut line of flat stomach
upwards, over the defined bumps of a well-muscled chest that showed
through the thin fabric of his T-shirt. A dark, even stubble covered
Josh’s jawline, concealing the little cleft in his chin Parker
remembered so well, even after all these years. How could he not?
He’d teased Josh by dipping the pad of his thumb in it so many times,
resting it in that little hollow before he’d kissed him breathless. Most
of the times he’d done so lying between Josh’s thighs, with those
long, strong legs on either side of him, holding him, embracing him,
and pulling him close.

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Parker pushed the thought aside very resolutely. Just as he did, he

remembered his host’s ability to read his thoughts. Maybe Josh could
do that, too, although he was probably still far too young. Parker felt a
deep blush creep into his cheeks. One brief glance at the older
vampire confirmed his assumption. He was smiling now, with a kind
of politely detached expression on his face.

“I’m sorry,” Parker whispered dreadfully, aware that he’d just

given the vampire a—well, what exactly? An eyeful? A mindful? An
insight into all the delicious hours he’d spent with Josh, no less. A far
more intimate insight than he’d ever meant to share with anyone,
precisely.

“It’s okay,” the vampire said softly. “I know most of it anyway.”
“How?”
“Josh. When I first met him.” Affection blossomed on the

vampire’s face as he turned his head to look at Josh briefly. “He was
very unrestrained then. Very…open.”

Josh flinched a little at the words but remained perfectly silent,

even as his older companion continued, “He was easy to read, even
more so than you are now. Of course, he was just a newborn, and he’d
been hurt and was raw emotionally, so his defences were
understandably low and—”

“That’s enough, Maurice,” Josh said in a quiet, but firm voice.
Parker froze. Josh had clearly mastered the art of speaking with

his fangs extended, and he just as clearly didn’t hide them anymore.
An immaculate pearl white, razor-sharp, and mercilessly lethal, they
had flashed for the fraction of a second between his lips.

“Josh,” Parker croaked at last. His voice was embarrassingly tight,

and he was still finding it hard to force regular breaths in and out of
his lungs.

“The one.” Josh didn’t bat an eyelid. Only his jaw muscles stood

out with tension, and Parker tried hard not to think about just how
strong those muscles were. What exactly they were capable of.

“How, uh, how are you?”

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Josh shrugged noncommittally and, rather than answering

Parker’s question, glanced at his companion. Neither of them spoke a
word, but it didn’t take a mind reader to know that they were
communicating in some nonverbal way.

After a moment of silence, the older vampire—Maurice—said,

“I’m afraid it can’t be helped.” Josh looked mutinous but said
nothing. He stared at the wall, or maybe he was simply trying to avoid
meeting anybody’s eyes.

“What’s this about?” Parker enquired.
“You came here asking for my help regarding the…

individuals of

our species who have killed your family,” Maurice stated matter-of-
factly. “Why?”

“Well, simply because I heard a rumour that you knew about

them. Their whereabouts, to be precise.”

“I see. Who told you?”
“Oh, I’m sure you understand that I cannot possibly unveil my

sources.”

A thin smile played on the vampire’s lips. “Of course I

understand. In fact, I’d be most upset if you did. But tell me, why
should I betray my own kind to someone who will set out to kill
them? A human, at that?”

“Because they’re killers,” Parker retorted heatedly.
“Isn’t that a mere matter of definition?”
“Meaning?”
“Well, you’re calling those individuals killers because they are

responsible for the deaths of your family.”

“Too right I do!” Parker snapped. “Your point being?”
“Would you consider yourself a killer, Parker?”
“What?” Parker looked around nervously. Somehow this wasn’t at

all going as it was supposed to. He tried to catch Josh’s eye without
even knowing why he bothered. After all this time, and what was
worse, the way Parker had treated him during their last meeting, the
last thing on Josh’s mind would be to help him and defend him.

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“Do you think of yourself as a killer?” the older vampire repeated.

His voice was still perfectly calm.

“Well, I…” Parker swallowed. There was no denying that the

atmosphere in the room had changed. Maurice was looking at him
with a kind of knowing, but otherwise unreadable, expression, while
Josh kept staring at the far wall, seeming nearly oblivious to what was
going on around him. He clearly wasn’t interested in the conversation
between his companion and Parker, and Parker understood with a
surprisingly painful cringe in his stomach that Josh really didn’t care.
Not about what was happening, not about him. And he certainly
wasn’t going to be any help to Parker either.

“I probably am one—a killer, aren’t I?” Parker answered quietly.
“Not probably. You are.”
“So…what now?”
The vampire watched him curiously. “What do you think?”
“Can’t you tell?”
“In fact I can. But I already told you that I wasn’t going to harm

you unless you intended to hurt me or anyone else in my home. I
cannot see you wishing to do that, so you’re safe with me.”

“Well, that’s good, then.” Parker let out a nervous little chuckle.

“So what about those vampires? Are you going to help me?”

“I’m afraid I can’t.”
The answer was given calmly, which made it a stark contrast to

the uproar of emotions the words caused inside Parker’s chest. Of
course, Maurice had no reason to help him go after his own kind, but
so far, knowing that hadn’t stopped Parker from hoping for him to do
it anyway.

“Well, in that case, I think I should stop wasting our time here.

Just one more question, if that’s all right.”

“Feel free to ask.”
“What about Josh?”
“Josh?” The vampire seemed surprised and needed a moment to

catch on. “Ah, you mean the story behind Josh’s presence here?”

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“Yes.”
“He’s here for the same reasons you are, actually.”
In a barely noticeable movement, Josh shifted his weight, but

other than that, he remained outwardly indifferent.

“In fact, it is Josh who you should talk to,” Maurice added.
“Josh? Why Josh?”
“Because he is the one who knows all about the people you’re

chasing. He knows where they’re staying.”

Parker’s heart started pounding away nervously, but it wasn’t all

just happy excitement. Josh knew about the vampires he was chasing?
Of course he knew the tragic story of Parker’s family, but Parker
hadn’t told him anything about the identities of the sick monsters who
had slaughtered them. That meant Josh must have taken it upon
himself to investigate them further. And it seemed he had been by far
more successful than Parker had.

“You know about them?” Parker asked curiously. He wanted to

know what Josh had found out as much as why he had bothered
investigating.

“Yeah.” The syllable sounded a lot like a sigh when Josh exhaled

it.

“Why? I mean, what is your interest in them?”
The moment the words were out, Parker realised his slip. Even if

he hadn’t grasped it himself, it was plain to see in Josh’s eyes. The
formerly so gentle brown orbs narrowed contemptuously, and Josh’s
lips curled in an angry but, fortunately, mostly suppressed snarl as he
leaned forward ever so slightly.

“Do you think you’re the only one who’s got an interest in them?”
Parker flinched involuntarily at the glimpse he caught of the large,

pointed fangs in Josh’s mouth. He must be really pissed off if he isn’t
bothering to keep his fangs retracted in company. Pissed off or trying
to bring his point across.

“Look, Josh, I—”

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“Why don’t you get over yourself for once?” Josh said coldly.

“What happened to your family is horrible, and my heart still goes out
to you for your loss. But it’s not the end of the world, and you really
should have moved on by now and gotten a life. A real life, not just
an existence that is filled with hatred and the quest for revenge. That
is never going to get you anywhere. All it does is get you and the
people who care for you hurt.”

“Oh, so you think I should just let those fucking bastards get away

with it?” Parker shot back spitefully. “They killed my family. All of
them.” He swallowed against the sudden tightness in his throat. “And
not just them. They killed everyone I loved.”

Something flashed in Josh’s eyes. A shared memory. Shared

emotions and dreams. Parker would have given a lot to know what he
was thinking, but the feeling of an emotional connection between
them flickered and died. Josh dropped his gaze. “I’m not saying you
should let them get away unpunished. All I’m saying is that you
shouldn’t let them ruin the last fragment of your life that’s still intact,
too.”

“Meaning?”
“Meaning…” Josh looked up again. “Meaning you should let the

matter of their punishment be taken on by someone who knows how
to handle these things a bit better than you do.”

“Oh. Well, I used to think I was doing fairly well at handling these

things.”

“Huh. Did you?” Josh raised an eyebrow mockingly. “Is that why

after all these years, the culprits are still free? Still running around and
still killing people? Is that how good you are at handling these things?
Well, forgive me for popping your bubble, Parker, but you’ve failed.
Completely. You’ve failed to catch even a single one of them, let
alone take them all out, and I doubt you ever will. They’re a bunch of
relatively young vampires, but they’re clever. And they’re reckless.
Merciless. Turning me was nothing but collateral damage for them in

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their greater plan, if that. They might have enjoyed it, even though
they only wanted me as a warning for you, which you know.”

“Yes, because I was close,” Parker interjected. “I almost had

them.”

Looking indifferent, Josh shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe not. We’ll

never know how close you really were and if you would have caught
them. And if you could have killed them off. All I know right now is
that if you keep pursuing them and get too close again, you won’t be
given another warning. If you don’t take them out first, they’ll use
their chance at taking you down. And they’re stronger and don’t have
any scruples at all. Don’t forget that.”

“How could I?” Parker said bitterly, once again staring at the twin

bumps behind Josh’s full lips with mixed feelings of contempt, regret,
and, above all, deep, burning guilt.

Clearing his throat, Maurice brought himself back to attention.

“Well, I’m glad this is all sorted out now,” he said dryly. “So, Parker,
I believe you know now that this issue will be taken care of even if
you’re not the one who does it.”

“Well, who does?” Parker was getting impatient. He hated being

told what to do or not to do at the best of times, and being told to stop
chasing the devils who had slaughtered his family and lover was more
than he could stand. He stared at the old vampire and the slightly
amused expression on his face.

“Josh is the one who will lead them into the trap that has been set

for them,” Maurice explained levelly. “After that…well, all you really
need to know is that they will no longer be a threat to anyone.”

“I’m going with him.”
“What?” Josh jerked his head up and around to Parker.
“I’m going with you. I want to be there when you confront them.”
Josh groaned and rolled his eyes. “Fuck, Parker. There’s no place

for you in this. The plan has been made without you, and frankly, you
just don’t fit in it.”

“Yes, but—”

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“Parker.” The old vampire interrupted him in a quiet but

nonetheless authoritative voice. “You can go with Josh, and he will
talk you through the plan for your peace of mind. But”—he raised a
finger when Parker tried to speak up—“after that, you will leave him
alone to execute that plan. Understood?”

Parker briefly considered protesting but knew it was going to be

futile. Maurice’s mind was obviously made up, and any further
discussion might just make him change his mind and deny Parker the
access to the information he’d just been granted. “Understood,” he
grumbled through clenched teeth.

“Fine. Now, if you’ll excuse me for a moment, I haven’t had my

meal yet, and I find all this mental concentration rather exhausting
these days. You may wait outside for Josh. I won’t be keeping him
long.”

The tone of his voice made it clear that Parker was dismissed, but

he had no intention of letting himself be dismissed. “Why isn’t he
coming just yet?”

The two vampires exchanged a quick glance, and once again,

Parker had the unsettling feeling that there was a conversation going
on he was kept in the dark about.

“I will join you shortly,” Josh replied, then he covered the

distance that separated him from the exit in a few long, effortlessly
elegant strides, and held the door open for Parker with a meaningful
expression on his face.

“Well, okay,” Parker said after a moment’s hesitation. “I’ll wait

outside then.”

In all probability, the two of them needed a little more time to

discuss his visit. Or their plan. Or perhaps what was happening in the
room he’d just left was something else entirely. Hovering in front of
the door, Parker listened intently. His sense of hearing wasn’t
remotely as excellent as that of a vampire, but it was better than the
average human’s. He could hear the low slur of voices and then a
muffled groan followed by complete silence. The kind of silence that

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was charged with the eerie tension of something significant
happening.

A few minutes later, the door was pulled open from the inside,

and Josh emerged, looking a little tired. And irritated. When he saw
Parker standing halfway down the narrow corridor, leaning on the
wall, he let out a sigh.

“So you’re still here.”
“Of course I am. You didn’t think I’d waste a chance like this, did

you?”

“No. No, I didn’t.” Josh took a breath. “A guy can hope though,

can’t he?”

“Oh, wow, thanks. It’s nice to see that you’re so happy to see me

again after…” Parker swallowed awkwardly, interrupting a sentence
that could only end badly.

Josh stared at him for a moment. “Just for the record. I don’t want

you here. If it was my decision, I’d have sent you away the instant
you set foot into this building. Well, no, actually I never would’ve
even allowed for you to come here. But the choice isn’t mine, and I’d
be a fool to try to act against Maurice’s order.”

“This Maurice,” Parker said quietly. “Who is he anyway?”
Raising his eyebrows, Josh chuckled. “You call yourself a

vampire slayer, but you’ve never heard of Maurice St Clair?”

“Well. No. Gonna fill me in?”
Josh grinned. “Yeah, okay. Why not? Not here, though.”
“Not?”
“No.” Josh started walking in his unsettlingly smooth and sexy

stride.

“Wait. Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.”

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Chapter 7

“So what is all this mysterious stuff of you going after them and

leading them into a trap about?” Parker asked when they had left the
old house.

Not stopping, Josh led him to the road before he answered. “Not

here.”

“Er…great. Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.”
“Lovely.” Parker rolled his eyes in mutiny, but Josh just kept

walking and ignored him. They went past rows of old buildings like
the one they’d just left, until they reached the better, newer and
cleaner part of the city. Parker had been watching Josh secretly as
they were making their progress. He was clearly in good shape,
although the pallor of his skin and the sunken areas around his eyes
hinted at him needing to feed soon. It struck Parker as odd because
when he’d arrived, Josh’s cheeks had had that giveaway rosy tinge of
fresh blood coursing through his system, along with the
corresponding gleam of his eyes.

At last Josh slowed down. He entered a small front garden, and

lithely bounded up the stairs that led to the entrance of a neat little
house.

“Where are we?” Parker enquired, craning his neck to be able to

take in as much of his surroundings as he could.

“My place.” Josh unlocked the door and held it open to let Parker

inside. Slipping past him, Parker couldn’t help the tingle of unease at
his neck. All Josh had to do now was lunge forward, clutch at Parker,
and slam those teeth into his throat.

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“Shush,” Josh called out to him in an amused voice. “I’m not

going to hurt you, okay? And I won’t snack on you, either.”

“Good to know.” Parker hovered in the hall, watching Josh

carefully lock the door then brush past him.

“Would you like a drink now?” Josh called casually over his

shoulder.

“Just a glass of water,” Parker replied and snarkily added, “If you

have any.”

“Course I have. Here you are.”
Startled, Parker took the glass Josh held out to him. The man—

vampire—had been alone in what presumably was the kitchen for no
more than maybe twenty seconds and hadn’t known Parker’s answer
for half of that time.

“Just in case you wonder,” Josh said and signalled for Parker to

follow him with a casual flick of his hand. “I cannot read thoughts,
and neither can Maurice. He likes pretending, but we’re merely good
observers. Although, I suppose I still have to learn a lot.”

Puzzled, Parker stared at him. “How did you know?”
“I told you. We vampires are good observers.”
If Josh had noticed Parker flinch at the word, he wasn’t letting on.

Only his soft brown eyes glittered with something like grim
amusement. Again, he waved for Parker to follow him, this time
leading him into a small, plain living room. Clearly, the room was
meant to serve a purpose, but that purpose had little to do with
making its occupants feel comfortable and at home. There was a TV
set in one corner, directly opposite a smallish blue sofa, a little coffee
table, and nothing else.

“What?” Josh enquired when he caught Parker glancing around.
“Nothing, I just…”
“Didn’t think vampires lived in ordinary homes, did you?”
“Uh, no. I’ve never been to the home of one, actually. So far

they’ve always been hiding in other people’s homes or in abandoned

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houses like the one—” Biting his tongue, Parker stopped himself. Like
the one they killed you in.

It didn’t take a mind reader to know what Parker was thinking. He

was well aware of that, and he couldn’t make himself meet Josh’s
eyes.

“So what did you expect? A coffin?” Josh joked, but his tone was

laced with a bitterness that hadn’t been there before.

You’re remembering it, too. Of course you are, because you’re

still living the nightmare while I am still trying to deny it ever
happened.

“No, I just didn’t think it was all so…ordinary. This could be

anybody’s home, really.”

“Well, I suppose it could.” Josh shrugged, but his voice still

possessed a distinct brusqueness. “But it’s not. It’s mine.”

“Have you been living here, uh, all the time?”
Smirking, Josh shook his head. “Nn-nn. I spent some months just

finding my way around and discovering what the world would be like
for me. Searching for, and finding others of my kind, that sort of
thing.”

“It seems you’ve succeeded,” Parker said, surprised at the

bitterness he felt. It even swung in his words, but he had no right to
grudge Josh his companionship with other vampires. It had been the
logical thing for him to do as a newborn vampire. Find others. Others
of his kind. Others who would teach him what it meant to be a
vampire. Introduce him to a strange new world that Parker had only
ever caught glimpses of. He was becoming increasingly aware that his
knowledge of vampires was dangerously lopsided. All he had ever
bothered to find out about them were their weaknesses and the places
they were most likely to hide in. He had never cared to think about
their reality, their everyday lives, or their…relationships. Did Josh
have a relationship? Was there someone who shared his home, his
bed, and his body?

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Parker couldn’t help running his eyes over Josh’s body, assessing

him. Appraising him. He was an exquisite creature. Had been even
before his altered state had added to his attractiveness. Who had
enjoyed playing with this beautiful body in the past years? Explored it
and caressed it? Brought it pleasure? Parker swallowed nervously.

There was a lump in his throat, and his chest felt tight. Almost too

tight to breathe. Josh was entitled to a life of his own. But the thought
of a faceless lover touching him, kissing him, damn, fucking him, got
to Parker more than he’d ever thought possible. He’d been Josh’s
first. His first lover, the one who had introduced him to the magic two
people in love could create between them. Fuck. He groaned. He had
been in love with Josh back then, hadn’t he? Fallen for the sweet,
innocent boy who had given him everything.

Josh certainly had loved him. He’d said so, and Parker knew it

hadn’t been a lie. Josh wouldn’t lie. Not about that and not about
anything else. He just wasn’t the kind of guy who lied.

“I guess I have,” Josh commented with a casual shrug.
“So are you going to tell me about this great plan now?”
Clearly still unwilling, Josh sighed and said, “There isn’t that

much to tell, really. I’m going to approach a member of their little
gang, try to gain their trust, and get them to take me to their hiding
place. Then I’ll try to find out how many members this gang has and
who they are, and, well, after that, things will no longer be in my
hands.”

“Why, what’s going to happen?”
Josh let his gaze rest on Parker for a long moment, considering his

answer. “Like humans, vampires also have certain rules and morals
that have to be followed by all members of society. What this group
has done requires punishment in our system, just as it would in yours.
Once the criminal members have been identified, they will be taken
care of.”

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“Oh. Phew. Are you saying there is something like a vampire, uh,

police who go after criminals? What happens when they catch the
culprits? Will they get thrown into prison?”

A thin smile played on Josh’s lips. “No. No prison. I’m afraid our

methods of punishment are a little more…archaic.”

“Archaic?” The back of Parker’s neck tingled with a not very

pleasant sense of understanding. “Meaning they get killed?”

“No, not killed.” Josh shifted uncomfortably. “There are other

methods.”

“What methods? What does that mean?”
“It means they will—” Josh interrupted himself with an impatient

sigh. “Look, Parker, I don’t know how much of this I should be
telling you. This is our world. It’s different from yours, and although
you’ve been trying to hunt down some of our members for years, you
have obviously very little knowledge of what this world is really
like.”

“Then why don’t you tell me?” Parker enquired, but he needed no

more than a look into Josh’s eyes to know the answer. “You don’t
trust me. You think that if I know too much about your society, as you
call it, I will try to go after your leaders.”

Josh stopped him with a soft smile and a shake of his head. “No. I

know you hate us. Not just the ones who have killed your family, but
our entire species, and whilst I believe that you would happily seize
the chance to extinguish us once and for all, I don’t believe you’d
start killing off those who actually try to keep the rogue and
dangerous ones of our kind under control. That wouldn’t be helping
your cause. However, I’m not entirely comfortable confiding
potentially harmful information about the weaknesses of my species
in someone who might be tempted to use it against us.”

Parker let out a snort. “I already know how to kill vampires. I

don’t need you to confide that information in me.”

“I know.” Josh nodded earnestly. “But I’m not talking about

killing. What I’m talking about is worse than death for a vampire.”

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“Oh. I didn’t know something worse than death existed.”
“Trust me. It does,” Josh said quietly. The set lines of his

shoulders and jaw made it clear that this was the last he was willing to
say on the matter, and Parker decided to leave it at that. Not that he
wasn’t curious. He was, more than ever, but Josh wouldn’t tell him, at
least not now. Maybe with a little more time to get used to each other
again, he would be more trusting.

“So what now?”
Josh gave a casual shrug. “We wait. Or rather, you wait. I’m going

to be in touch when it’s over. Until then…” His dark eyes flicked to
the door in a meaningful gesture. “You wait.”

“But I don’t want to wait!” Parker protested. “I’m not going to sit

at home waiting for you to do all the work and—” He fell silent,
realising that the reason he didn’t want to stay away was not what he
had thought it would be. It was confusing.

“And what?” Josh asked softly, regarding Parker with a curious

expression.

“This is going to be dangerous, isn’t it?” Parker had to force the

words out, feeling their sting when the truth in them and its full
meaning unravelled in his mind.

Josh nodded softly. “Yes. Yes, it’s going to be dangerous. These

vampires are relatively young, but older than I am.” He let out a grim
chuckle. “Well, of course they are. I don’t know what they’re capable
of in terms of supernatural powers, but we know how brutal they can
be. If they see through my act…well, I guess I don’t need to tell you
what they could do to me.”

“Do you think they will? See through it, I mean.”
“Maybe.”
“Why? Why do you do this?”
Josh shrugged, holding Parker’s eyes defiantly. “It’s a risk I’ll

have to take if I want them gone.”

“Yes, but—”

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“Fuck, Parker!” A throaty growl accompanied Josh’s words,

sending a shiver down Parker’s spine. “Quit it, will you? I have my
reasons for going after them, and I will go after them. If I had my way
I’d have you removed as far as possible while I do so, but for some
reason Maurice seems inclined to let you in on this, so there’s not
much I can do about it.”

Parker forced himself to stand his ground. Josh was scary like this,

but he was fairly certain that he was still safe to be around. “Okay.
Fine. But do you really expect me to go away and sit around in a hotel
room until you call me to say it’s all over? To tell me that the demons
I’ve been hunting for well over a decade are gone? I want more than
that, Josh. I need more than that. This Maurice, and you, apparently,
won’t let me go after them myself. Okay. But I want to be there every
step of the way you take. I want to know what happened and what
progress you made. Is that asking too much?”

Josh let out a deep sigh. His irritation seemed to have evaporated

as suddenly as it had welled up, and he looked resigned.

“Okay then. Go get your stuff from the hotel. I’ll get the guest

room ready. You can stay here for however long it’s going to take.”
Turning away, he left Parker standing in the middle of the room, but
Parker called after him before he was gone.

“Josh?”
He knew Josh had heard him. Of course he had, with his superior

sense of hearing, but he didn’t stop, just slowed down.

“Thank you.”
The only answer he received was the echo of Josh’s steps from

somewhere at the other end of the hall.

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Chapter 8

When Josh returned in the small hours of the next morning, his

beauty was flawed by exhaustion and an even darker mood than the
one he’d left in. It was easy to tell that he had best be left alone, but
Parker was far too excited to keep his distance. He’d been waiting the
whole night for Josh to return, so he deserved some answers at least.
Good ones, preferably. Anxious for information, he had jumped up
the second he heard a key in the door and rushed down the hall.

“What happened? Did you meet one of them? What did they say?”
“Easy,” Josh warned, and the tone in which he muttered the two

syllables had Parker back off instinctively. This wasn’t the Josh that
had left him just a few hours earlier, shortly after midnight, to start the
first stage of the plan. This version of Josh was darker, more
dangerous and feral than Parker had ever seen him. More like any of
the other vampires he had met. Once again, Josh hadn’t bothered
retracting his fangs. Their outlines were easily recognisable behind
the lush bow of his mouth. He must have fed, too, because beneath his
grumpy expression, his skin was radiant and healthy looking, and his
eyes shone brightly.

“Tell me,” Parker pressed impatiently. “Please.” Now that was

something he hadn’t thought he would say, but his curiosity was
getting the better of him.

“I met them,” Josh said quietly, but he was clearly unwilling to

share further information as he pushed past Parker.

“And? How was it?” Parker followed him, choosing to ignore the

angry look Josh shot him over his shoulder.

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Josh didn’t answer as they crossed the hall, walked up the stairs,

and entered his bedroom. Like the living room, it was sparsely
furnished with nothing but the most necessary items. A bed,
wardrobe, chest of drawers, and a mirror on the wall.

Still wordless, Josh took off his jumper, revealing a lean-muscled,

smooth-skinned torso, then he undid his belt and fly. When the pair of
tight-fitting black slacks hit the floor, Parker had more than he could
take. “What are you doing?”

“What does it look like?” Josh grumbled through clenched teeth.

“I’m taking my clothes off.”

“Yeah, so I see. Why?”
“Because I can’t stand the smell a minute longer.” Another growl

rumbled deep in Josh’s chest, but he seemed to get a grip on himself
again quickly, and the nasty, threatening sound stopped.

“Josh, what happened?”
“Let’s just say I was reminded of why these people need to be

taken out,” Josh grumbled as he stooped to pick up his clothes. He
touched them gingerly at first, as if the garments really were
something he couldn’t stand being near of, but then he shook his
head, sighed, and stuffed them into the laundry basket that stood in
one corner of the room.

“Did they hurt you?” Parker asked, blocking Josh’s way when he

tried to push past him. Maybe blocking the path of a cranky vampire
wasn’t among the cleverest things to do, Parker thought as he caught
the flash of pointed white teeth when Josh opened his mouth a
fraction to let out a sigh.

Josh was standing right in front of him now, so close that Parker

could have felt the warmth of his body—if Josh’s body had been
producing heat.

“No,” Josh said quietly. “They didn’t hurt me.”
“Then why are you so pissed off?”
“They fed me,” Josh muttered. He pushed right past Parker and

went into the bathroom. He shut the door firmly, and Parker knew that

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this was a boundary he’d better not try to cross, regardless of how
much he wanted an explanation for this mysterious comment.

* * * *

Josh remained in the bathroom for over half an hour, during most

of which the sound of the shower could be heard. Parker tried hard
not to think about a naked and wet Josh inside a steaming shower
cubicle. And yet, when Josh joined him in the kitchen where Parker
was just helping himself to a cup of coffee, Parker’s head was filled
with vivid and annoyingly enticing pictures. It didn’t help at all that
Josh looked squeaky clean with a charming flush covering the patch
of skin that peeked out from underneath his T-shirt. His still-moist
hair was slicked back, emphasising his high cheekbones, symmetrical
features, and full lips. He looked stunning and kissable, but at the
same time more carnal than ever. Even his walk as he approached
Parker was that of a predator. A hungry cat on the prowl. Parker’s
cock twitched and started filling, which was entirely inappropriate
given the situation.

He hated vampires, didn’t he? And even if he didn’t, this was

ridiculous. Josh hated him and didn’t want him to be there, and yet…

There was a curious gleam in Josh’s eyes, a flicker of something

Parker couldn’t quite figure out, as the beautiful vampire stood in
front of him, waiting. Watching him. He was completely immobile.
Not even his chest heaved, but Parker felt attracted to him as though
they were both magnets. And apparently Josh felt it, too, this weird,
inexplicable need to touch and to feel. To kiss.

The coffee cup shattered on the floor. Parker had dropped it

carelessly when he lunged forward to grab Josh by the waist and the
neck at the same time, pulling him close with a desire he hadn’t even
known existed. And Josh was in his arms, responding to the embrace
with a fierceness equalling Parker’s own, and yet, Parker knew Josh
was holding back. He must be, because his arms around Parker didn’t

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feel at all uncomfortable or threatening, but just like the tight, needy
grip of a passionate lover who couldn’t seem to get close enough.

It took them a little longer to find each other’s mouths. Parker

would never have admitted it, but in the second before his lips met
Josh’s, he wondered what it would be like to kiss him again, to feel
those exquisite lips yield under the pressure of his own once more.
And yes, he did wonder what it would be like to kiss a vampire. When
he slipped the tip of his tongue between Josh’s lips and pried his jaws
apart, he half expected to come across those razor-sharp canines he’d
seen just minutes earlier. He did touch the sharp ridges of teeth, but
they were all of the ordinary kind, and anyway, what did it matter?
What mattered was Josh’s slick, skilful tongue that met Parker’s,
sliding along it playfully, welcoming, inviting, and caressing. They
kissed with a need, a passionate intensity born from years of
separation and the knowledge that regardless of what they did, they
would never be able to bridge the gap between them. But it didn’t
matter. They were here, now, together again at last, and they were
going to make the most of it. Parker could feel it in the tingle in his
own cock and groin, and he could tell it by the hard press of Josh’s
erection to his thigh.

He leaned back a bit, creating just enough space between them to

get his hands to Josh’s waist and sneak them under his T-shirt. Josh
groaned at the first stroke of fingertips over his tightly ribbed stomach
muscles. He, too, shifted his grip on Parker. Cupping Parker’s face
with one hand, he used the other to squeeze his butt. Parker followed
the taut lines of Josh’s body and trailed the parallels of ribs up to the
bulges of hard pecs. He brushed a nipple, almost by accident, then
again and again, teasing the little nub until it was stiff and begging for
more. So was Josh. He moaned into their ongoing kiss and flexed his
hips in shallow thrusts, rubbing himself against Parker’s groin in
lascivious, slow waves. It was too good, too much, and too tempting.

“Bed,” Parker mumbled, still kissing Josh as if his life depended

on it. And maybe it did.

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“Yeah,” Josh gasped, going backwards and pulling Parker along

with him. He moved with astonishing confidence, seeing as he was
barely paying attention to where he went. When he had managed to
steer them through the narrow kitchen door and to the foot of the
stairs, Parker was trusting him enough to let himself be led. It was
peculiar, almost like a dance, and he felt safe with Josh. Safe enough
for this manoeuvre, at least, but the feeling changed when they were
in the bedroom. They shed their clothes in quick, unceremonious
motions, and Josh sank back on the bed, pulling Parker on top of him.
He spread his legs and enveloped Parker in the welcoming grip of his
slender thighs, but Parker froze and resisted the invitation. He broke
the kiss and sat back.

“No,” he said with determination. “I want you on your knees,

facedown.”

Josh looked up at him, surprised at first, then a knowing half smile

curved his soft lips into a very kissable pout. “Do you want to tie me
up, too?” he asked levelly.

“Would you let me?”
The smile on Josh’s face widened, and he gave a careless shrug.

“Why not? If it makes you feel safe.”

Safe. Parker hadn’t felt safe in a very long time. The sensation of

easy trust he’d experienced minutes before was gone as reality
entered and he was becoming aware of what he was doing. About to
do, rather. Here he was, ready to engage in a very close physical
encounter with one of the most dangerous species on planet Earth.
Would a couple of feet of rope make him feel any safer? No. Not even
half a mile of chain would do that. It wouldn’t do much to keep Josh
in check anyway. He no longer was the relatively feeble, confused,
and inexperienced newborn Parker had chained to a wall in his dark
and dank basement. Parker had no doubt that by now, Josh had
figured out exactly what he was capable of. Still, it was a nice offer.
Smirking, Parker shook his head. “Just lie down and remember that

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should you try anything with me, I know what I’m doing. I know your
weak spots and won’t hesitate to hurt you.”

“Ooh,” Josh cooed teasingly. “Now that’s a line you like to hear

when you’re about to get fucked. Whatever happened to let’s play
safe and use a condom?”

He grinned up at Parker but rolled on his stomach anyway,

drawing his knees up underneath him. The position put his arse at
exactly the right height for Parker. Parker reached out and stroked the
firm globes with his fingertips, appreciating the soft, smooth skin for
a few sweet moments before he firmly dug his fingers into the flesh.
Josh grunted in surprise but didn’t pull away.

Parker kneaded the butt cheeks, assaulting the smooth skin a bit

more before rubbing his hands over it to soothe.

A soft moan escaped Josh, and he pushed back, wordlessly

inviting Parker to take the next step. He moaned again, louder, when
Parker’s finger found the way into his body.

Parker pushed in gently, breaching the tight little seal that had

once been so willing to let him in. Had others been there since? he
wondered briefly, but refused to dwell on it. Instead, he focused on
the feel of Josh’s satiny insides around him as he explored the walls
of this hot, tempting channel. He found the sweet spot easily and
nudged it with his fingertip, just lightly, but Josh twitched in
response. The muscles in his back flexed, a faint ripple of immense
power trapped underneath flawless pale skin. Parker was under no
illusions. Josh could kill him in the bat of an eyelid if he chose to do
so.

He pushed a second finger in, sinking yet deeper into the velvety

folds of Josh’s body. It was easier to stimulate the little nub inside
him now, and Parker did it, remembering how Josh had reacted to this
the first time. He’d been so beautiful, so pure in his marvelling at
what pleasures nature had foreseen for him. Josh had come fast that
first time back then, an inexperienced teenager overwhelmed by the
sensations inflicted on him.

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He had more control now. Rocking gently, he met Parker’s fingers

stroke for delicious stroke, helping Parker finger-fuck him slow and
deep. He’d feel amazing around Parker’s cock, that satiny grip
enveloping him and tugging at his swollen flesh.

“Let me fuck you.” Parker ground out the words, suddenly

desperate beyond caring how he sounded. Beyond caring what danger
he was in.

“Yeah.” Josh’s answer was a husky groan, an alluring sound full

of need and arousal.

“Um, got any…?”
“You don’t need condoms with me,” Josh said gruffly. “Vampires

can neither catch nor transmit STDs, or anything else, for that
matter.” He glanced back over his shoulder. “Come on, stud. Fuck me
bare.”

Parker was thrown for a few seconds. No, Josh was no longer the

sweet, innocent boy he had seduced. He was a man now, comfortable
with his desires and expressing his needs.

Hollowing his back, Josh gave him another silent invitation. The

muscles along his spine shifted and stood out with tension as Parker
accepted it and entered Josh for the first time in years. The muscles
inside him yielded easily, just a brief resistance, and Parker’s cock
slid in deep. Josh groaned and pressed back, taking him deeper yet. It
must have been near uncomfortable for him to be filled so quickly,
but he seemed to know what he was doing and what he could handle.

Rocking gently the way he had done before, Josh fucked himself

slowly on Parker’s hard shaft, letting it slide in and almost all the way
out of his body over and over again. Parker let him do it and watched
him near passively, mesmerised by the carefree play of muscles, and
the way the light caught and caressed Josh’s skin. He groaned and
squeezed his eyes shut. Damn, he was right there. He didn’t want it to
happen yet, and he would have loved to hold off just a little longer,
but if he tried that now, he’d only spoil it. Parker came with a scream
that was half lust, half frustration. He slammed into Josh’s body one

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last time, pressing himself into the welcoming slickness as deep as he
could get. He could almost feel the soft tissue yield to the heavy
pulsing of his shaft. He even imagined he could feel the throbbing of
his own veins echoed in Josh’s insides and the life pulsing through
both of them, but that was impossible. Realising Josh wasn’t there
yet, and writhing in front of him in a state of near despair, Parker
shoved his dark thoughts away and leaned forward. He brushed a
quick kiss on his lover’s back, right between the shoulder blades, then
he slid an arm around him to pull him up and back.

“Huh?” Josh looked a little puzzled but was fast to understand,

and he rearranged his legs so he could sit on Parker’s lap. Parker’s
cock was still buried inside him and still hard, but it would soon go
limp, so Parker reached for Josh’s proud, bobbing erection quickly.
He clenched his fingers around it and tugged firmly. Josh grunted but
pushed up as best as his awkward position allowed him to do. He was
close, closer than Parker had expected, and it wouldn’t take much to
finish him.

“Shh, it’s okay, baby,” Parker whispered into Josh’s neck. “Come

for me.”

He flicked his tongue across the soft patch of skin, just lightly,

teasingly, but it was enough. Josh’s cock pulsed in his hand, and his
husky cries filled the air as climax gripped him. When the spasms that
had rocked him had subsided, Josh let his head fall back and rested it
on Parker’s shoulder. It was an eerily intimate thing to do, and
suddenly, Parker found himself faced with all the old emotions and
regrets again. He noticed all the little things that should have been
there but weren’t. A thin sheen of perspiration on Josh’s skin. The
throbbing of his veins under Parker’s lips. The puddles of sticky cum
on his belly and thighs. The heavy breathing after the strain. But none
of those signs of arousal were there. Josh was as crisp and cool as
ever, and the only sign of what they had done was slowly dripping out
of his body and soaking Parker’s lap with its tangy stickiness in that
place where their bodies were still resting together. When Josh turned

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his head and looked back over his shoulder, lips parted in silent
question, it felt like the most natural thing in the world to kiss him.

Their mouths met, reuniting at last in a slow, careful kiss, and for

a brief moment, the world was perfect. Parker tightened his grip
around Josh’s chest, pulling him closer and holding him as he slipped
his tongue into that delicious cool mouth, exploring, savouring, and
tasting…blood. He tasted blood. The distinct, metallic flavour of it
tickled his taste buds. For the fragment of a second, the world stood
still. In another split second, Parker’s brain presented him with the
logical explanation. He’d cut his tongue on Josh’s razor-sharp, half-
extended fang. Then a very quick preview of what was going to
happen flashed before his mind’s eye.

Turned ravenous by the sample of blood, Josh would crave more.

He’d spin around, easily breaking Parker’s hold, and take what he
wanted. Would it hurt? Parker wondered. Would Josh latch on to one
spot, penetrate his vein with those needle-sharp fangs and suck him
dry, or would he bite him again and again, creating wounds just for
the thrill of biting then let the life run out of Parker the way he
himself had been left to die?

“Oops, sorry.” Breaking into Parker’s dark fantasy, Josh’s soft

voice dragged him back to reality. A reality in which Josh looked at
him a little sheepishly. A reality in which Josh sat in front of him, half
turning to be able to look at him. Parker blinked to clear his vision
from the blurry images his mind had been showing him. Reality
couldn’t have been any more different.

Josh looked at him with dark, gentle eyes that held concern, the

sweet memory of sexual bliss and an affection Parker found hard to
bear.

Josh was no ravenous, blood-crazed monster. He was beautiful

and vulnerable, laying his emotions bare in front of Parker the way he
had from the day they had met. His body was temptation turned to
flesh, naked and with his handsome, still semihard cock resting
against his thigh, sated.

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He could have been perfect but for the lack of a flush tinting his

skin and the breaths that should have been heaving his chest. The
heartbeat that was supposed to pump blood through his veins.

Tears were stinging the backs of Parker’s eyes, and he quickly

averted his face. How could Josh still be here and taunt him like this
with the emotions and the memories he evoked, when he was really
nothing but a sad caricature of the man Parker had fallen in love with?

Josh shifted in his hold, gently freeing himself from Parker’s

grasp.

“I’ll take a shower,” he whispered. “Take your time.”
Parker knew what he meant and, although he felt bad about

resenting his lover instead of adoring him, he was indefinitely grateful
for being left alone with his bitterness and pain.

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Chapter 9

Parker woke several hours later with a pounding headache. He

vaguely remembered having cried himself to sleep, and he had done it
in Josh’s bed. Josh apparently hadn’t come back.

Parker threw back the quilt and got up, wincing in mortification

when he noticed the stickiness at his groin. Damn, he really ought to
have cleaned that up in time. He snatched the thin black bathrobe
from its hook by the door and slipped into it. It felt good on his skin,
smooth and cool, and the faint traces of Josh’s scent that clung to it
gave it an air of familiarity.

He padded into the bathroom, relieved himself, and washed

quickly, pulling grim faces at his mirror self. He had to find Josh.
Apologise to him. He winced again at the memory of his breakdown,
of Josh sensing it approaching and leaving him alone. Josh must have
known he was the last person Parker wanted to have around him at the
time. He must have felt awfully rejected, used, even. And, given the
suddenness and circumstances of their lovemaking, it must have
affected him, too. Maybe he had been just as confused as Parker had
felt, the vampire finding pleasures in the arms of the…of the what?

Parker no longer was the vampire hunter he had used to be. He

had given that up after Josh had been turned. When he had begun to
see them for what they were. People who just happened to be
different. He knew they did not really present a danger, at least not all
of them, and maybe, somewhere at the bottom of his heart, he’d
known all along that it was wrong to go after a whole group, an entire
species, just because he had come across some foul eggs.

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Tying the dressing gown’s belt in place around his hips, he made

to go downstairs. It was four in the afternoon, and whilst he had no
idea what Josh did for a living, he had the feeling that he wasn’t alone
in the house. The feeling became certainty when he heard the sound
of muffled voices.

He stopped. Listened. One of the voices was Josh, soft and clear,

and easy to identify. The other was familiar, too, but it took him a
moment to recognise it as Maurice’s. What reason did the other
vampire have to pay Josh a visit at home? Surely none other than
discussing Josh’s discoveries with him, right? Right.

Maurice’s deep, dry voice could be heard again. “Will he let you

into the group?”

“I think so. Eventually, that is,” Josh answered him. “But right

now I have the feeling he is testing me. Trying to find out if I’m real
and, um, how well I fit in with them.”

“How well you fit in?”
“Yes.”
There was a brief pause, and when Maurice spoke again, he

sounded concerned. “What did he make you do?”

“We fed.”
“Oh. I’m guessing you’re not talking bottled drinks here, are

you?”

“No. No, I’m not.”
“Did anyone get harmed?”
Josh sighed. “Nn-nn. At least not seriously. There were two, and I

let mine go early then fussed a bit, so Bill was distracted and let his
one go, too.”

“Will they remember anything?” Maurice’s voice was harder now.

Clipped and enquiring, almost interrogating.

“I don’t think so. Mine won’t, and Bill’s probably won’t, either. I

can’t say for certain, but I think it was better this way. Better risk him
having some blurred memories than none at all,” Josh added with a
bitter note.

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“True,” Maurice admitted. Then he asked, “How are you playing

it?” His words were tinted with concern.

Josh let out a snort. “Well, he’s gay, too, so I went for the obvious

approach.”

“You hit on him?”
“Well, it certainly worked better than just letting him know I was

one of his kind. He ignored me and then brushed me off until I started
flirting with him for real. Then he was interested, and, well, one thing
led to another, and suddenly we were in that back alley, hunting and
feeding.”

“And making out,” Maurice added knowingly.
“That, too,” Josh said, almost too low for Parker to hear him.
“So you’re going to try to snog your way into their lair?” Maurice

asked.

“If I have to. They’re not very welcoming, it seems.”
“What are you going to do if he…wants all of you before he takes

you to meet the family?”

Josh took a moment to answer. “Well, then I’ll have to deliver,

won’t I?”

“It seems you’re really determined to see this through,” Maurice

observed thoughtfully, and then, in an even lower voice, he added
something which sounded like “my beautiful little whore.”

“I am. Trust me, I am. I need to get this over with. I need them to

be gone once and for all.”

“Hmm. Does this new or, rather, old, man of yours have anything

to do with this?”

“Well, yeah. Obviously.”
“I see. I take it this means you will be no longer willing to

continue our…arrangement?”

“Maurice,” Josh said slowly, almost pleadingly. “Parker is…he

means something to me. He used to mean everything to me, and I
used to think I meant something to him. But now he hates me. He
can’t stand to be around me, and I just can’t stand that look in his eyes

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whenever he realises who I am. What I am. I’ll never be able to
change that, but maybe I can at least give him some peace of mind by
helping him rid the world of the demons he’s chasing. Maybe if
they’re gone and he is no longer eaten up by hate and revenge, maybe
then he’ll be able to—”

“Oh, Josh.” Maurice interrupted him softly. “You’re fooling

yourself, don’t you understand that? Parker will never be able to
forgive you for what you are. He will never be able to forget. His
wounds and his hatred of our kind run too deep.”

“But he has changed already!” Josh protested. “He no longer

hunts us and no longer tries to kill us off just because we are who we
are. So maybe—”

“Josh,” Maurice cut across him again, more firmly. “You fucked.

I can smell him all over you, and yet he is nowhere to be seen, while
you look as though you didn’t sleep at all since I last saw you.”

“Well, I didn’t. I’ve been out chasing after the bad guys all night,

remember?”

“Yes. And gone home and been cosy with handsome afterwards.

Just tell me, why didn’t I find you tucked up in bed with your guy
rather than sitting around alone and breathing blue?”

“I’m not—”
“Suit yourself, Josh. Whatever you want. Just remember, I have

an interest in you, too. If you want to hurt yourself trying to get
somewhere with your hunter boy, fine. If that’s what you need to do,
do it. I’ll be here if he breaks your heart again, but in the meantime,
don’t forget that we have something, too, Josh. You can’t just give
that up. I’m not going to let you go that easily.”

“Maurice.” Josh sounded almost desperate now. “I’m sorry. I

know. I know that there is something between us, and I’ll honour
what we have. I won’t…” He broke off once more, and this time a
tense silence followed. It was the kind of meaningful void that usually
meant people were listening for something. Parker held his breath. He
hadn’t made a noise, had he? It was astonishing that he’d gone

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unnoticed for so long. And even more astonishing was what he had
learned.

So Josh and Maurice had a common interest, huh? He could

imagine only too well what that was and shuddered at the thought of
the old vampire’s hands on beautiful, young Josh’s body. Did
Maurice get to touch him, hold him, kiss him, and, above all, fuck
him? Could he fuck Josh the way Parker had earlier that day, the way
he had all those years ago? And could Josh really open up to Maurice,
let go without holding back, and be the vampire he hadn’t been able
to be with Parker? More than those thoughts, even, one thing Josh had
said to Maurice stood out. I’ll honour what we have.

He wasn’t going to settle for Parker, and why would he? Even if

Parker could overcome his reluctance and resentment, Josh would
never again be fully his. Josh belonged to them now. Parker knew that
and had known all along, but he had never considered that it might
entail a relationship with one of them, too. Of course, Josh could
hardly be expected to have stayed alone ever since Parker had sent
him away. He had lost Josh. Lost him for good. And still, sweet, loyal
Josh was willing to put himself in danger to chase after the monsters
Parker should have been chasing. The monsters Parker should have
taken out years ago. Parker’s mind was made up in an instant. He
coughed loudly then walked down the stairs at a leisurely pace.

As expected, Josh and Maurice were in the living room, but they

were standing rather than sitting. They were suspiciously close
together, too, so maybe he’d misinterpreted the silence. Maybe they
had been kissing rather than listening. Perhaps he should have given
them more time rather than interrupted them.

“Hello,” he greeted casually and cast a brief glance at each of

them. Maurice looked back levelly, but Josh didn’t quite meet his
eyes. There was a sheepish expression on his face, and he shifted his
weight as if subconsciously trying to escape.

“Sorry I slept so long,” Parker added when it became apparent

that neither of the two vampires was going to give him an answer. “I

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guess staying up all night has left me more exhausted than I would
have expected.” He added a half-suppressed yawn to bring his point
across. Josh, for all his evasiveness, was obviously keeping a closer
eye on Parker than he’d been letting on.

“Would you like some coffee?” he offered dutifully.
“Oh, that would be lovely,” Parker replied. “If you don’t mind.”
“No, not at all. I’ll, er, get it.” Exchanging a quick glance with

Maurice, Josh left. He could be heard rummaging in the kitchen
seconds later.

Parker kept his silence for a few seconds, then he gave Maurice a

companionable smile. “Quite a night he had, huh?”

“I’m sorry?” Maurice replied coolly, and Parker’s heart sank a

little. Maybe the two of them had already agreed on not letting him in
on the secret, or rather, maybe Josh had asked Maurice not to talk to
Parker about it. Time for a little I’ll show you mine so you show me
yours.

“Well, it’s great that Josh managed to hook up with one of them

so soon. That’s far more than I’d been hoping for at this stage.”

“Ah, yes. Right,” Maurice answered, still evasive.
“What d’you reckon, will this Bill take him to meet the others

anytime soon?”

Parker was well aware that he was risking everything with this. If

Josh had indeed told Maurice that he was keeping Parker in the dark,
Maurice would know now that they’d been overheard. But Parker was
running out of time. Josh would be back any second, and with his
exceptional sense of hearing, he might have already caught what
Parker had asked. Half expecting Josh to come rushing through the
door to interrupt their little chat, Parker was pleasantly surprised when
Maurice looked at him sceptically but just shrugged and said, “I
suppose so. Josh can be persistent when he has set his heart on
something. And convincing. I’m guessing it won’t take him long to
gain Bill’s trust.”

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“And then what? He can hardly take them out on his own, can

he?”

“No. He’s not supposed to. Some…others of our group are going

to do the dirty part of the job.” Yeah, right. As if Josh whoring himself
out to get into their group isn’t a very dirty part, too.

Parker let out a deep sigh. “Ah, I only wish I could be there when

it happens,” he said and cast Maurice a meaningful glance. “But I
understand that that isn’t an option. Still, I would give an arm to at
least see the bastards who killed my family. Especially since it would
mean I could just bugger off back home then.”

Maurice regarded him thoughtfully. “Go back home? I thought

you wanted to stay until the end?”

Parker shrugged. “Well, yes, I do, but I figure that if you guys

won't let me get involved in the actual taking them out part, there is
little point in me hanging around, only to be told when it’s over. You
can tell me that over the phone.” Leaning in, he added in a
confidential tone, “The truth is, I’ve wasted so much time of my life
on them, now that they’re about to be gone forever, I can’t wait to
start living one.”

Maurice’s cold blue eyes flickered. “Hmm. Very understandable.

What about Josh, though?”

“What do you mean?” Parker asked, playing dumb.
“Well, I was under the impression that you intended to, um,

rekindle an old flame. Aren’t you?”

Parker smiled, forcing himself to believe the lie he was about to

feed Maurice so he would sound convincing. “Let me put it this way.
We did some rekindling last night, and I found that the flame just
won't really burn. I think it’s best to leave it at that. Besides, Josh is
both part of a past I can’t wait to put behind me, and he’s a vampire.
He’s really not all that high up on my list of lovers anymore.” Making
a face, he added, “But of course he doesn’t know that yet, which is
why I’m a little hesitant to tell him about my plan to leave as soon as
those bastards are dealt with.”

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“I see.” Maurice looked pleased. “Maybe if you want to see them

so much and it will help you find your peace, your wish should be
fulfilled. It won’t hurt for you to go and cast an eye on the culprits as
long as you make sure to steer well clear and not raise any suspicions.
What do you think?”

Parker hid his smirk behind a delighted beam. “I think that would

be simply great. Uh, you wouldn’t happen to know where I can find
them, would you?”

“Oh, in fact I would,” Maurice replied, returning the smile. “And I

happen to know exactly where you’re very likely to find them tonight.
Josh is supposed to meet Bill, so if you turn up at the same time and
stay out of sight, you’ll easily recognise the mark.”

“Tonight?”
“Yes. Too early for you?”
Parker shook his head. “No. Not too early. Just…right. Go on, tell

me where they’re meeting, then.”

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Chapter 10

Josh turned up at the exact time and exact place Maurice had said

he would. A shady bar in an even shadier part of town. And he met
someone. A tall, slender guy with a neat haircut that wouldn’t quite
match his poor taste in clothes. Well, maybe he was dating a
hairdresser when he wasn’t busy flirting with Josh. Parker watched
them for a while, trying to battle down the increasingly bitter sting of
jealousy at the sight of the man he loved hitting quite shamelessly on
the stranger—Bill, the evil vampire, apparently. He kept telling
himself that Josh was just pretending, using the advantage he was
given by his pretty exterior and the fact that his enemy was gay, but
still, it hurt when Josh and the other vampire started snogging away
with gusto, in full view of everyone in the shabby little bar. Not that
anybody seemed to care or paid them more attention than a casual
glance in passing.

Parker should have left long since. He should have caught one

glimpse of one of the guys who were responsible for the death of his
family and leave. But of course, Parker had never meant to leave after
that first sighting. How could he? He had waited thirteen years for a
chance to put faces to the phantoms he had been chasing for so long.
Now that he knew who they were, he wasn’t going to let someone
else take care of them. Not even if that meant that he forfeited his last
chance at being with Josh. And a shaky chance at that, because he had
exchanged less than two sentences with Josh. Neither sentence had
been about what had happened between them the night before. Josh
probably wouldn’t miss him much anyway. He had Maurice to go
back to. Knowing that Maurice was the one to make him happy stung,

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but then again Parker wouldn’t have been pleased with any guy Josh
could have chosen. All he could hope for was that Maurice would at
least indeed make him happy.

Across the road in the shady little bar, Josh was getting ready to

go. He was making a good show of appearing regretful as he peeled
the other guy’s hands off his arse and finally succeeded in making his
exit a full five minutes and steamy kiss later.

Parker fought down the sting of jealousy. The time to act had

come. He waited until Josh had made it down the road, then he
brought himself into a strategically better position just outside the bar.
He didn’t have to wait much longer. Bill left just a few minutes later,
taking off in the opposite direction Josh had taken.

Parker followed him. He didn’t even try to make no noise or be

invisible. He wouldn’t go unnoticed by a vampire for long anyway.
But being unnoticed had never been the plan. The plan was for the
vampire to notice him, and either call his mates for backup or grab
Parker and take him to his lair. But oddly, Bill did neither. He just
kept walking, leading him out of this part of town and to the harbour
area. Parker followed him for a while, and then suddenly, the vampire
was gone. Nowhere to be seen.

Parker froze midmotion, listening. He felt the familiar cold clasp

of fear claw up his spine and settle in that spot right at the base of his
skull, but he ignored it. So what. He’d grown used to it. Fear didn’t
frighten him anymore because fear couldn’t hurt him. They, however,
could hurt him.

Tilting his head, he willed his feeble senses to provide him with

more information. Information that might be vital for his survival, but,
little surprisingly, his senses failed him. He could hear nothing, see
nothing, and, fuck, smell nothing.

Well, of course that wasn’t true. He could hear the soft, almost

melodic rushing noise, and the faint thuds of the falling rain. He could
see it as silvery threads, reflected by the dim light of the singular
street lantern at the end of the road. He could even smell it in the air

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around him, the moisture it brought, and the damp earth it stirred.
Rain. Water. One of the major sources of life but entirely meaningless
to him. Just like life itself had lost its meaning.

There. A movement to his right. A slight disturbance of the air,

gone as fast as a shadow and just as impossible to catch.

Well, nearly as impossible to catch, Parker thought grimly as he

tightened his grip around the gun he was holding. The secret was
knowing how to do it—and having the right equipment. Turning
slowly around his own axis, he stared into the ghostly darkness that
surrounded him. He knew he was at a mighty disadvantage here, but
he didn’t exactly have a reputation for his clearheaded approach to
pursuing his goal. His quarry. Some might say it was what made him
so good at what he did. Some certainly said it was what was going to
get him killed. Parker didn’t care about either of them. He didn’t care
about anyone or anything apart from what was needed to bring him
closer to his enemies.

He never even heard his attacker approach. With the sudden,

unforeseeable power of a lightning strike, Parker was grabbed, lifted
up, and whirled through the air before he hit the ground with a nasty
thud. That would have been his skull breaking, he mused with an
eerie detachedness, even as bright pain exploded in his brain and
nausea threatened to overwhelm him.

He ignored both. Like fear, pain was something he’d learned to

ignore. It only told him he was still alive. Which he wouldn’t be much
longer if he didn’t get a grip on himself and start fighting back.

Except there was nothing to fight. He raised his head gingerly to

look around and take stock. A moan slipped out of his mouth before
he could stop it. Fuck, but his head did hurt. So much it affected his
vision, so maybe the damage was worse than he’d thought. Blinking
furiously, he tried to make his eyes focus, but the world around him
remained blurry.

This time he stifled the sound that wanted out, a little sigh. If it

was still around, then tonight might well be the end of it—the end of

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Parker, to be precise. Shivering from a sudden gush of cold air, Parker
reached into his pocket and curled his fingers around the familiar,
smooth round shape. The metal had warmed from the heat his body
was radiating. It felt quite nice now, actually. Comforting, friendly,
and nothing like the deadly tool it was.

“Take your hand out of your pocket,” a voice ordered right behind

Parker’s left ear. “Slowly, and be sure to leave whatever’s inside it
where it is.”

Parker let out a sarcastic chuckle. “Now why would I do that?” he

asked, clenching his fingers around the bulbous piece of metal. If he
was to part with it, it would have to rip his arm off.

“If that’s what you want.” The voice was void of emotion, and

Parker knew it had figured out exactly what his plan was and found a
way to keep him from putting it into effect. Which meant he’d failed,
so maybe whatever was about to happen served him right.

The creature behind him laughed softly. “Yeah, right. You’re

quite the hero, aren’t you?” It must have leaned in, because the voice
was closer now, and Parker could feel the air the thing expelled with
its words stir the hairs at the nape of his neck.

“But let me tell you, Parker—tonight isn’t the end of it. At least

not the way you think it will be. No, for you, tonight is the
beginning.”

* * * *

The first thing Parker realised when he woke was that he couldn’t

move. It was scary, but it made sense. He’d suffered a severe blow to
the head, and he’d crashed on his back, so there might be a spinal
injury, too. The next thing he became aware of was the burning
sensation that seemed to have grabbed his entire body in its cruel
claws. He started to shake, but it wasn’t the tremors of a chill that
rocked him. This was something entirely different. Every fibre of

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every muscle seemed to be in uproar and trying to tense at the same
time, regardless of their respective antagonists.

Already he was drenched in sweat, and the only thing that kept

him from screaming was the fact his jaws were clenched so tightly
that the sound which tried to tear itself from his throat couldn’t
escape. He didn’t know how much time passed. It could have been
days, hours, or maybe just minutes, but it didn’t matter. There was no
room for time inside his tormented mind anymore, no space for
anything but the overwhelming pain. When he finally realised that he
was not alone as he had thought he was, he found it impossible to tell
if his companion had only just arrived or been there throughout.

He couldn’t seem to recall if the dry, firm clasp of strong fingers

around his own hand had been there earlier or not. He couldn’t
remember when the dark figure who sat on the side of his bed had
entered or who it was, in fact. But eventually, as he struggled to focus,
the outlines took on a familiar shape. Josh.

Apparently noticing him looking, Josh gave Parker’s hand a

gentle squeeze, cleared his voice, and quietly said, “Hey, you.
Coming to at last?”

“Er…” Parker had to clear his own voice before he could

continue. “Yes. It seems so. Although it’s all blurry and—ouch!”

“Shh, easy,” Josh soothed. “Don’t fight it. Try to relax your

muscles, that will make it easier.”

“How the fuck am I supposed to relax?” Parker snarled, but he

realised that Josh was right. The cramps had decreased to a level
where they were at least bearable, and when he tried to let go and
willingly unclench his muscles, the pain left him almost completely.
Looking up, he searched Josh’s face for the answers to questions he
didn’t know how to phrase. Couldn’t phrase because trying to put his
tumbling thoughts into words meant admitting to the horrifying
suspicion weaved through them.

“Better?” Josh asked gently. Josh, ever understanding and

compassionate.

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“Fuck, no!” Parker snapped, but the sharp words seemed to

bounce right off Josh.

“Would you like some water?” he offered levelly.
“Uh, yes.”
“Okay, here you go.” Josh handed him a small glass. “Just, uh,

drink slowly, please.”

“Why, do you think I can’t handle my drink?” Parker replied

spitefully and raised the glass to his lips. The first sip was cool and
calming on his lips. It washed away the bad taste in his mouth,
leaving a trail of soothing fresh moisture in his dried-out throat, all the
way down to his belly. He could feel the water spread out inside him,
its gentle lapping against the lining of his stomach. Then, without
warning, the relief of the cool wetness turned into agony. His stomach
heaved, and a second later, he spat out the water and what felt like an
enormous amount of acidy digestive fluids. Clearly surprised but
nonetheless efficient in his reaction, Josh dodged the disgusting brew.
He stared at Parker with wide eyes.

“I guess that gives us some answers,” he said tonelessly after a

moment of startled silence.

“I didn’t know anyone had asked,” Parker replied in a feeble

attempt at humour. Josh was right. This was an answer of sorts.
However, it was an answer that only raised more questions.

“What happened?” Parker forced himself to ask.
“You were…uh, attacked.” Josh sounded evasive. Unwilling to

address the subject, it seemed.

“Right. I remember that.” Not really, at least not any details, but

yes, there had been something…a dark alley, the lonely yard, a tall,
bodiless phantom that had suddenly appeared out of nowhere. An
eerie voice, cruel in its tone as much as in the words it had uttered.
This is not the end, Parker. For you, this is the beginning. Parker
suppressed a shudder, or tried to, anyway, but Josh picked up on it. Of
course he did, with his damned supernatural senses.

“Well, how much do you remember?”

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“Just…going there and getting smashed around like a rag doll.”

Parker wouldn’t have shared more than that even if he had been able
to remember anything beyond this. Maybe he should be glad he
couldn’t remember. He probably should be glad he couldn’t
remember, even if part of him was still trying to draw up those
missing memories from somewhere deep in his subconscious.

“I see. Want me to fill you in on the rest?”
“I think I have a pretty good idea what happened,” Parker

grumbled. “At least of the outcome.”

“Well, you’ll be surprised to hear that your assumptions might be

wrong.”

“Huh? What are you talking about? How do you know what I’m

assuming, and what makes you think it is wrong?” No, arguing wasn’t
logical. There was no point denying the facts, just as there was no
point attacking Josh over this, but it was the only thing Parker could
do. The only distraction he could find to keep himself from thinking
about what had happened in the dark alley and what the consequences
were.

More clouds appeared on Josh’s face, and he heaved a deep sigh.

“Okay, here’s the thing. We’re not sure you were turned. Not
completely, that is.”

“Um…huh? What, you’re not completely sure I was turned

or…?”

“We’re not sure you were completely turned,” Josh emphasised.
“I see. Who’s we anyway?” Not that it mattered, but by now, any

distraction was welcome.

“Maurice and I.”
Maurice. Of course. Bloody Maurice, who occupied Josh’s body,

heart and soul. Parker closed his eyes.

“Did you come after me?”
“Yes, sure. Eventually. When I came home and you weren’t there,

I got Maurice to tell me that you had come to spy on my meeting with
Bill, and we tracked you down. Fuck, Park, what were you thinking?”

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Josh snorted and shook his head angrily. “We would never have let
you go after one of them alone. If you couldn’t wait for justice to take
its course, then at least you could have let us help you instead of
leaving us to pick up the pieces.”

Ignoring the hurt in Josh’s voice, Parker grumbled, “Well, maybe

you shouldn’t have.” At least then it would be over now. At least then
this blood-sucking monster would have finished me, and I wouldn’t
have to worry about anything anymore.

“Yeah, right,” Josh huffed. “And then what? Were you going to

blow yourself up along with them or what?”

Blow up? “How do you know about…?” Parker asked quietly.
“You were still holding your little ball of love and explosives in

your hand when Maurice found you. You’re lucky it didn’t go off
while you were out in wonderland.”

“But it should have gone off!” Parker blurted out. “That was the

whole point. I wanted it to go off and take the bloody bastard out.”

Josh’s eyes narrowed. “It would have taken you out as well.”
“So what? I thought I was going to die anyway. At least that way I

would’ve taken one of them with me. Not quite what I had planned,
but better than all of them getting away and me…me being here
and…” He couldn’t make himself say it. He had barely begun to wrap
his mind around the idea, let alone accept it, and saying it out loud
would be the first step down the road to acceptance.

“Well, for what it’s worth, I’m glad your plan didn’t work out,”

Josh said quietly. “I much rather have you here in one piece than
getting to scoop up your leftovers.”

“Great. At least one of us got what he wanted then.”
At last Josh’s anger was beginning to show. “For fuck’s sake,

Parker! Stop being a fucking irrational brat about this! You could
have died back there, and—”

“And now I’m one of them!” Parker yelled. “I’m a vampire! Now

why, exactly, is that better than death? Honestly, I wish I had died. At
least then I wouldn’t have to face life as a monster.”

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Josh had turned pale at the last words. “A monster? You’re still

thinking of us as monsters? Of me, too?”

“Well, you are one of them, aren’t you?” Parker said acidly.
“Yes. Right, I am one of them. Although apparently, and this is

what I’ve been trying to talk to you about all along, you are not. Not
entirely, that is.”

“Huh? What do you mean, not entirely? I know something about

me has changed. I can feel the difference.”

“Yes.” Josh sighed. “But the thing is, you haven’t turned. Not

completely. “They set off the turning process, but for some reason
didn’t finish it. Right now, you’re somewhere in limbo, so to speak.
You’re not entirely human anymore, but you’re not yet a vampire
either.”

“Will I become one?”
Josh gave him a long look full of compassion. “I know what this

means to you, Parker, and I honestly wish I could tell you that, no,
everything will be all right again, and you’ll get through this and will
be just the way you were.” He took an unnecessarily deep breath to
speak. “But I can’t tell you that. I simply don’t know what’s going to
happen. Maurice is still looking into this. He called a friend about it,
but he has yet to get back to me.”

“So…what now?” Parker asked.
“I have no idea. All we can do is wait and—Parker? Parker, fuck,

what’s wrong?”

Parker knew something must be seriously wrong to make Josh’s

voice climb into such a pitch of panicky shrillness. And he could feel
that something was wrong. He was tingling all over again, like earlier,
but the cramps weren’t quite as bad. But he couldn’t breathe anymore.
It wasn’t as though he didn’t need it anymore or couldn’t suck in the
air. He could draw in breaths, and the frantic spasms with which his
rib cage worked to get them in told him that his body was fighting
desperately to meet this need, but it was as if no matter how much air
he sucked into his aching lungs, they couldn’t process it.

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“Fuck, you’re suffocating!” Josh yelled. Tears were streaming

down his face as he watched Parker, but Parker found it increasingly
impossible to see him as his vision began to get blurry. Little stars
were dancing in front of his eyes now, and he knew it would be only a
matter of seconds before it would all be over. Wet moisture spilled
over his lips and flooded his mouth. In the split second it took Parker
to realise what it was, what Josh must have done, he tried to fight it
off, but he had just been making another attempt at snatching a breath,
so he sucked in the whole mouthful of blood. It went down his
windpipe, choking him, and he started coughing. But some of it
seemed to have found the right way into his stomach as well, and
oddly, Parker was beginning to feel as if breathing was getting easier.

Distracted by the realisation, he swallowed more blood. It was

good. Not in taste, but in what it did to his body. It was like an instant
cure to the disease that had possessed him. More liquid ran down his
throat, and he drank it. Actually drank it. He hated himself for doing
it, but at the same time he was finding it impossible to resist. A higher
power, or maybe a more basic need, was urging him on to take what
Josh was so willingly giving him. But there was more. Yet another
need demanding to be fulfilled.

Josh gasped in surprise when Parker grabbed him and pulled him

onto the bed with him. Parker didn’t ask for permission. Still sucking
the blood from Josh’s severed wrist, he ripped Josh’s jeans off him.
Literally ripped them off. The fabric gave with a complaining tearing
sound under the assault of his hands. Next to go were his own briefs.
Of course, he’d been in bed and his clothes must have been drenched.
It made sense to have taken them off. What didn’t make sense was
thinking about clothes when all he wanted was to bury himself in
Josh’s body and fulfil the white-hot, burning desire inside him.
Shifting awkwardly, he squeezed himself between Josh’s legs, prying
them apart roughly.

“Let me fuck you,” he panted against the torn, blood-smeared

inside of Josh’s arm.

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“Okay,” Josh gasped, arching his hips to meet him. Parker didn’t

know if Josh was as aroused as suddenly as he himself was, or if he
was just taking pity on Parker’s overwhelming need, and he didn’t
really care. Couldn’t care as he sank into Josh’s body and started
pounding into him pretty much right away. Somewhere at the back of
his mind he knew that what he was doing wasn’t right. He was being
unnecessarily cruel. His desire was mingled with blind rage and fury,
and he was taking all his pent-up anger and aggression out on the only
aim he could find. Josh. And Josh took it all. He put up only just
enough resistance to give Parker something to fight, offering his body
as the battlefield Parker needed to deal with his inner demons once
and for all. It wasn’t nice.

Well beyond caring for any pain but his own, beyond feeling

anything but the searing agony and sexual aggression inside that
threatened to burn him up alive, Parker didn’t hold back anything. He
fought for all he was worth, knowing that Josh could handle what
would have caused serious, potentially fatal injuries in a lesser
partner—and that was ignoring the fact that Parker himself had
become a lot stronger.

As it was, the bruises Parker was leaving on Josh’s pale skin

disappeared within seconds after he’d caused them. As did the bite
marks. Every time his fangs ripped into Josh’s flesh, the hatred of
what he had become and of what he was doing welled up again,
sending off fresh waves of rage that only seemed to increase his blind
fury. Every time Josh’s warm, savoury blood spilled out of a new
wound and flooded his mouth, it was like pouring fuel straight into
the flames of mindless lust, and the fact that he actually enjoyed its
hot, rich taste didn’t help at all.

Parker didn’t know how long this insanity went on until he

realised that whatever had caused his uncontrollable greed seemed to
have gone. He still hated the bastards who had killed his family and
was still mad at them for having made Josh, and now him, one of their

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own kind, but the feverish rage with which he had wanted to fight
them and everything that represented them had vanished.

Looking down at Josh, who had gone still underneath him and

watched him with slightly suspicious eyes, Parker could for the first
time see the full beauty of this new life. It might only be a trick of his
new enhanced senses, but Josh had become the most perfect, flawless
creature Parker had ever set eyes on. His features seemed to be carved
from the most exquisite stone and his skin had an almost translucent
gleam to it. A faint thudding caught Parker’s attention.

It was fast and strong but regular. That must be Josh’s heartbeat.

One of those clichés that was turning out to be wrong. Vampires had a
heart, and it was still beating, but it was so well hidden, deep down
under a mass of muscle and bone, that its movements remained
imperceptible to human senses. Raising his head, Parker took a look
around. Josh wasn’t all that had changed. The dim light in the room,
the colours and shapes of the furniture, and even the walls were
different.

“Is this…” Parker whispered, awestruck but still unable to accept

the truth.

“Yes,” Josh answered just as quietly, clearly understanding

without being told. “This is what the world looks like to us.”

He shifted tentatively. It was barely more than a weak flexing of

muscles, but Parker felt the strength in his body nonetheless. Another
thing he felt was that they were still connected. Immensely ashamed
as he recalled how they had ended up like this and what he had done,
he carefully pulled back and out. Josh stifled a groan but sounded
genuinely concerned when he asked, “Feel better now?”

“Uh, yes,” Parker admitted, mortified. “In fact I do. I’m sorry. I–I

really shouldn’t have…”

“It’s okay,” Josh said lightly as he rolled over and out of the mess

of tangled, ripped, and bloodstained sheets that were scattered across
the bed. Standing, he stretched his slender body in a content, catlike
motion. Watching the sleek muscles ripple under flawless skin had

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Parker’s dick filling hopefully again. Suppressing a moan, he tried to
tell himself that that wasn’t possible. Through the haze that seemed to
envelop the memories of what he had just done with Josh, he
remembered with embarrassing clarity that throughout fighting,
hitting, and biting, he had, indeed, fucked Josh. Fucked him over and
over again, rushing from the aftermath of one orgasm straight to the
verge of the next and toppling over the edge again before he had even
had the time to understand what he was doing. He doubted that he
would have cared though.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, aghast at what he had done.
Josh held his gaze levelly and apparently read Parker’s mind as he

said, “What about? Trying to fuck the living daylights out of me? It’s
okay. Honestly. If I’d minded, you would have noticed. Believe me.”

Looking into Josh’s kind but unyielding eyes, Parker believed

every word. He had believed it even before his excess. It was what
had allowed him to let go and lose his temper the way he had, after
all.

“I know,” he said earnestly. “And maybe sorry isn’t the right

sentiment. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”
“So what now?” Parker asked unwillingly into the silence that

followed. Doing up the buttons on his fly, Josh half turned his head
and shrugged. “Going out for dinner, I guess.”

Parker felt the blood drain from his face. “You mean…” There

was no way he could finish that sentence.

“I haven’t fed yet, and the sooner you learn how to find food, the

better,” Josh explained calmly. He pulled a jumper over his head,
leaving his hair even more gloriously dishevelled. The fine-knit, light-
grey garment emphasised his broad shoulders and muscular chest
without being too obvious. Once again, Parker was astonished at the
changes in Josh’s appearance. In spite of everything he knew, a part
of him still refused to accept that Josh no longer was the cute boy

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he’d been when Parker had met him. Watching Josh bend over to put
on his shoes, he let out a sigh.

Josh straightened up, a knowing smile on his face. “It’s a common

misconception that vampires stay exactly as they are at the moment of
being turned.”

“Huh? How do you know what I was thinking about?” Parker

asked, a little embarrassed.

“It’s kind of obvious the way you are drooling over me.” Josh

sounded faintly amused. When he got up and walked to the door,
Parker was faintly aware that his movements looked weird somehow,
but he couldn’t quite figure out what it was. And compared to what he
was facing now, it seemed unimportant anyway. He followed Josh
outside.

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Chapter 11

“So…we’re going to have dinner, right?” Parker asked after a few

minutes of following Josh along the dark and mostly deserted roads of
his quiet neighbourhood to a well-lit and crowded part of the city that
was famous for its throbbing nightlife.

“Yes. Not feeding properly will only make us cranky, and it’s

never good to have a cranky vampire around, remember?” The smile
on Josh’s lips was thin and failed to reach his eyes. Parker could
easily guess what he was thinking about. A cold, grey morning in a
dank basement. Only the morning hadn’t been cold and grey. It had
been warm and sunny outside, the early hours of a hot summer’s day,
but the light hadn’t made it into Josh’s dungeon.

Parker winced. Knowing what he knew now, and having suffered

what he had suffered, he realised how barbaric his act had been. He
had left Josh alone and let him face these horrors and the excruciating
pain without even the vague recognition of a caring soul nearby. And
after that, through all the initial confusion and aftershock, he had
nearly starved the poor thing, threatened him, and shown him in every
possible way how much he despised him. His actions had made sense
to him then, but it was clear to him now how despicable his own
behaviour had been and how deeply he had hurt Josh during those
endless hours of waiting.

He continued trailing after Josh in shameful silence, focussing on

not losing sight of him as they weaved their way through a large
group of people leaving a cinema, and all the others who were out for
a good time around town. The sights and sounds, but above all, the
smells, confused Parker. Every detail his overloaded senses reported

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to him was too clear, too bright, and too loud. Almost like caricatures.
And he could smell every single person within what must have been
at least a twenty-foot radius.

Their scents got to him, enticed him even, and the experience was

hugely unsettling. Even more so because at the bottom of his
tormented mind, he knew exactly what it was that he wanted from
them. Hunger was lapping at his insides with grazing and persistent
kitten tongues.

“How often do we need to feed?” he asked uncomfortably.
Shooting him a quick glance over his shoulder, Josh grinned. “It

depends on how much energy we consume. Under normal
circumstances, no more than every couple of days. But you have only
just turned, so you need more. Besides, that little…orgy earlier burnt
up a lot of our respective energy levels. I, for my part, am quite
hungry.”

They kept walking in silence until eventually, Josh slowed down

in front of what looked like exactly the kind of old-fashioned,
traditional gentlemen’s club that no one who didn’t belong to would
care to look at twice. The polished plate which identified it was in
place right next to the entrance.

Parker stopped and stared, baffled, watching Josh walk up the four

immaculate pale-cream-coloured marble steps that led to a massive
oak door.

Before he had even had the time to knock, the door was opened

from the inside.

“Good evening. I’m bringing a guest tonight,” Josh told the big

guy in front of him. He flicked a gaze back to Parker then smiled at
the bouncer and added, “He’s quite new and still a little uncertain, I
think, but he’ll be fine.”

The bouncer glanced at Parker with a mild frown but turned to

Josh again and gave a brief nod. “You’ll be held responsible for him,
don’t forget that.”

“He’ll be fine,” Josh repeated, more firmly and without the smile.

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The big guy retreated to let him pass, and Josh took a step but

lingered, looking back again. “Aren’t you coming?”

A grin was tugging at his lips, and Parker jerked into action. He

hadn’t meant to gawp like a silly schoolgirl, but this was just
so…peculiar. He held back the question until he, too, was past the
austere guard, and they were walking down a long, narrow hallway
towards another door.

“What is this place?” he enquired. The guard was human, he was

fairly certain of that, because, well, the hungry beast inside his
stomach had raised its head hopefully when he had caught a whiff of
the man’s body scent.

“A club,” Josh answered levelly.
Parker rolled his eyes. “No, really. Who for?”
“People who share an interest.”
“And what interest would that be?” Parker didn’t try to keep the

annoyance from his voice this time. He was expecting another evasive
reply and was surprised when Josh smirked and said, “Feeding
vampires.”

They had reached the second door, and Josh was grabbing for its

handle, but Parker stopped him with a hand on his arm. “Wait. What
does that mean? What happens here? Josh, I’m not going to slam my
teeth into some poor devil’s throat and—”

“How about you just wait and see?” Josh interrupted him curtly.

“No one is going to force you to feed, but this is the best, cleanest
offer you’ll find.

“I won’t—” Parker started vehemently but fell silent at the sight in

front of him. Josh had pulled the door open, and from one second to
the next, Parker realised that the world as he knew it had changed.
Everything he had always assumed about vampires, how they were
detestable creatures in hiding, monsters that would scare away every
sensible human being, was quite obviously wrong.

The vampires he could see moving inside the club weren’t hiding.

Far from it. They were showing their fangs as they stood talking in

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small groups or pairs, and every now and then, a flash of pearly white
caught his eye when a mouth was opened to latch on to bare skin.

No, the vampires weren’t hiding. They behaved like any other

group of people would in the safety of a private club—playing and
feasting and fulfilling their wicked desires. Only what they were
doing was so much worse than anything he had humans seen do.

“Why aren’t they trying to fight?” Parker whispered, engrossed.
“Who? The humans?”
“Yes.”
“Why should they? They’re here out of their own free will.”
Parker let out a sarcastic snort. “Oh, are they?”
“Yes, they are. Why don’t you ask them yourself if you don’t

believe me?”

“Can I? Isn’t that, uh, forbidden?”
Josh smiled. “No, of course not. It would be pretty awkward, in

fact, if we weren’t allowed to talk to them.” Leaning in, he added,
“They’re not prisoners, Parker. They’re here because they want to be
here. Go ask around if you like.”

“Okay. I will.” Parker took a closer look at the people in the club.

Indeed, the humans didn’t appear uncomfortable at all. Quite the
opposite. He watched a couple hug and kiss passionately like any
other couple would do. The only differences were the giveaway,
rhythmic motions of the man’s jaw. Parker knew without seeing that
he was sucking blood from his partner’s tongue. The thought stirred
something inside him, but he didn’t know if it was just the hungry
beast in his stomach hoping to get fed, or maybe a darker, carnal
desire yearning to be satisfied.

For the first time, he allowed himself a conscious, albeit brief

fantasy of what it would be like to suck another person’s blood. Sure,
he had already taken Josh’s, but that had been a different matter,
hadn’t it? He’d been so desperate, he’d barely been aware of what he
was doing. And later, during that frenzied, manic fuck, he had only
bitten, not drunk. Besides, it had been Josh. Josh was something

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different. Josh was his lover. They had shared so much already, and
apart from that, Parker was gay, and swallowing or not had never
been a question for him, so he was familiar with the concept of
imbibing someone’s body fluids. But a guy’s spunk isn’t the same as
his blood, a voice inside his head whispered urgently. How can you
stand here and even consider drinking blood? Remember how it used
to make you sick when you had a nosebleed as a child and swallowed
some blood? Or that time a vampire punched you in the face and you
bit your own tongue?

“It’s not the same,” a far more real voice whispered into his ear.

Josh, proving once more that he was apparently, indeed, able to read
Parker’s thoughts. “You’ve changed, Parker. It’s what your body
needs now. You can’t deny your body blood any more than a human
could deny his body meat.”

“Technically, humans can deny their bodies meat and cope quite

well.”

“Fine.” Josh sighed. “So the comparison was lame. Say

carbohydrates, then. Humans can’t live without carbohydrates, at least
not without seriously damaging their health.”

“Yes, maybe, but carbohydrates don’t mind being eaten,” Parker

pointed out.

“Okay. Look at them. Over there.” Josh pointed out a couple who

was slow-dancing in a corner, at a little distance from the others. The
woman’s head was nestled in the crook of the man’s neck. Her eyes
were closed, and only a tiny trickle of glistening, dark-red liquid
beneath her lips gave away what she was really doing there, but
indeed, he didn’t seem to mind. His arms were wrapped around her
protectively, holding her tightly as he was leading their movements.

“Does he look to you like he minds?”
“Well, uh, no,” Parker admitted reluctantly. “Not really.”
“See?”

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“See what exactly? The only thing I see is that he doesn’t fight her

off, but I don’t see his reasons for that. She could have drugged him.
Paid him. Bullied him into it, even.”

Josh’s eyes narrowed irritably. “Come on, Parker. Is that really

what you’re thinking? Or is it just what you need to tell yourself so
you don’t have to accept that some people are okay with vampires?
Know of our existence, and don’t mind, can even bond with us. Is that
your problem? After everything that’s happened, do you really still
hate us so much that you can’t look beyond the fangs to see the
person behind them? That you can’t even imagine others being able to
see that?”

“Josh, I—”
“Oh, and before you answer—you do remember you are one of us

now, don’t you?” Josh added spitefully.

“Yes,” Parker answered in a dreadful whisper. “I do remember

that. And to be quite honest, I’m getting really, really hungry here.”

“Oh. Are you?”
“Yes. I must be, because otherwise I would have run from this

place screaming ten minutes ago.”

Josh looked surprised and a little thrown off track, which was

understandable. He had just tossed some serious questions at Parker,
and Parker had been supposed to fight back, to tell Josh he was being
ridiculous or even admit to the accusations. But Parker saying he was
hungry was clearly not what Josh had expected.

“Okay then. Let’s find you food,” he said after a moment.
Parker nodded wordlessly. It was all the agreement he could bring

himself to display, and already he was regretting having brought it up,
but he wasn’t stupid either. While his superhuman body obeyed with
delightful ease, he knew that his instincts would eventually get the
better of him. If he didn’t feed, he wouldn’t be able to control himself.
It was as simple as that. There was just one tiny but important
problem.

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“How does this work?” Parker enquired in an embarrassed

whisper, jerking his head in the direction of the kissing and dancing
couples. “The club thing, I mean.”

“It’s quite simple, really,” Josh explained. “You cruise the

premises for a bit, find someone who appeals to you, and see if the
interest is mutual. If it is, well, you’re free to do whatever you and
your supplier have agreed upon.”

“My…supplier?”
“Yes. It’s the term that fits the matter most correctly, don’t you

think? Or what would you have expected?”

“I don’t know. Maybe something like pet. Or…food. But

supplier? I don’t know. It sounds so…”

“So like they’re actually the ones who hold the power?” Josh

prompted cleverly.

“Yes. Yes, I guess that’s what I meant.”
Josh gave a shrug. “Well, they are the ones who hold the power.

They’re not weak, at least. They have something we need, while they
don’t need us. That gives them a big advantage.”

Parker wrinkled his nose, thinking. “That’s an interesting way of

putting it, but I guess I see your point. But still, you—we—are the
stronger ones, right? Vampires could just take what they want from
the humans if they couldn’t get it otherwise. And some of them do. I
know that.”

“True. There are always some who don’t play by the rules,

vampires and humans, but as a whole, we vampires have no interest in
starting a war with the human race.”

“Why not? Your chances to win aren’t bad. You’re a lot better

equipped physically. And you’d stand to gain a lot. You wouldn’t
have to hide anymore.”

“You’re missing the vital point,” Josh said softly. “Physical

superiority aside, we’re actually a rather peaceful race. Besides, we’d
gain nothing by fighting humans. Yes, we are better equipped for a
fight, but in a real war, there would be different weapons. Just think

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of you and the explosives you’re so fond of. It would be a fight we
could never hope to win, because our only chance would be to
extinguish or at least vastly outnumber the human race. But that
option doesn’t make sense, because we would be wiping out our own
food supply, which then would only lead to fights among our own
kind to get access to blood.”

“Hmm. I really never looked at it that way,” Parker admitted,

slowly processing Josh’s words and their full meaning. Could he
really have been so wrong about vampires all along? Misjudged an
entire species because of the crimes some wayward individuals had
committed?

“So you’re saying vampires are docile puppies at heart?” he

asked.

Josh’s dark eyes glittered with a hint of amused mischief. “Easy,

you. I’m just saying that we’re not the monsters you’d like us to be.”

“I don’t—” Parker huffed, but Josh interrupted him with a sweet

smile and a soft shake of his head. “This is not the place to discuss
this. Besides, you’re too hungry to think clearly anyway. Come on,
let’s get you fed.”

Josh didn’t give him time to object. Marching off, he crossed the

room in several long, catlike strides, and led Parker through an
opening in the far wall. A second, only slightly smaller room lay in
front of them. It was designed as a lounge area, with huge,
comfortable-looking armchairs and smaller settees scattered liberally
around it. Some of the sofas and chairs were occupied, and some were
empty. Unwaveringly, Josh walked up to a low, plush chaise longue
and its occupant, a beautiful woman with creamy skin and long, wavy
dark hair. She was dressed in a tight corset that showed off her
voluptuous curves and for probably the first time in his life, Parker
felt himself seriously attracted to a woman. Or maybe that was the
hungry beast inside him sensing the rich blood flowing in her veins
again.

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When she noticed them approaching, she beamed a welcoming

smile in their direction, and Parker couldn’t help feeling that she’d
just added a few watts for Josh’s sake.

“Well, hello gorgeous,” she greeted playfully. Her voice had an

alluring, throaty roughness in it as if she’d smoked one cigarette too
many.

Josh returned the smile easily. “Hello, Trisha. How are you?”
“Disappointed.” She inspected Parker with a long, unconcealed

look. “Very disappointed, but I guess I should have known it would
happen.”

“Well, if it’s any consolation, I wasn’t exactly planning for it to

happen,” Josh said with a hint of ice in his tone.

She glared at him briefly, and then her smile was back. “On the

other hand, this means I get the pleasure of being with two yummy
hunks.”

“Nn-nn.” Josh shook his head. “Just him. But I’d like to be there.”
“So you do want to join!” she exclaimed cheerfully.
Josh let out a small sigh. “Not like that. It’s his first visit. Are you

okay with that?”

The playfulness had vanished from her face, and she looked all

business as she regarded Parker closely. “First visit here or…?”

After a brief moment of hesitation, Josh unwillingly answered,

“It’s the or, I’m afraid.”

“I see.” Her expression darkened even more. “Well, sweetie,

much as I’d like to let you watch while I play with your man, I can’t
help you. Club rule, you see. Helps us all to stay out of trouble.”

“Drat.” Josh looked at her incredulously. “You mean you won’t

serve him because he hasn’t bitten anyone yet?”

“Not if he hasn’t fed on a living human before, no,” she confirmed

levelly. “And just so we’re clear—I would be able to tell the
difference, and lying about it would get you expelled. Well, it would
if you weren’t fucking the owner, that is.”

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“Whoa, easy.” Frowning, Josh glared at her. “The rules apply to

me the same as to everyone, and I wasn’t even thinking of telling you
a lie. Why would I? These rules were made for a reason, and I have
no interest in getting anyone hurt. Quite the opposite. All I was
wondering is how much experience will he need to be approved?
Would it be enough if he’d fed off another vampire who would vouch
for him?”

“Oh, sweetie.” She heaved a deep, regretful sigh. “You’re so cute.

I really wish you weren’t queer. Look, the thing is, he’s got to know
what he’s doing. He needs to know how not to cause lasting damage,
but above all, he must know when to stop.”

Curling a strand of long, wavy brown hair around her finger, she

let her eyes linger on Josh for a moment before she said, “He needs to
feed soon, I can tell. Just like you. He won’t be patient when you try
to teach him now, and you won't have much patience teaching him, so
the safest way for him to do it would be to go through you.”

“Fuck, Trisha,” Josh groaned. “Really?”
She nodded solemnly. “He’s a newborn vampire. He’s hungry.

He’s never bitten”—her eyes narrowed and she corrected herself—
“never fed on someone. How do you intend to teach him if he’s so
hungry he’ll just go for it? He won’t listen. He’ll just feed, and you’re
not the most experienced teacher in the first place,” she added slyly.

Josh raised his eyebrows. “Now what’s that supposed to mean?”
“You know what it means. You’re just a baby yourself. You still

have a lot to learn about this world, about your kind, and about life. In
fact, I can’t believe you turned him so early on. Well, I guess I can
understand your reasons for doing it, he really is adorable and I can
understand your wish to cling on to him, but I wonder what Maurice
says about it. Or are the three of you…?”

“Leave Maurice out of this,” Josh grumbled through clenched

teeth. “And although it is none of your business, I didn’t exactly turn
him. I only added the last vital touch, so to speak, but I didn’t have
much choice in the matter. And now that he is one of us, I’ll help him

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cope as best I can, okay? And if that means that I’ll have to let him
feed on me again, then fine, we’ll do it. Are you going to let me have
you?” Already his fangs were out, two sharp, pearly white reminders
of what he was. Vampire. Bloodsucker. The thoughts jolted through
Parker’s mind. Just like you are yourself, precious, so quit the fuss.

But Josh was not evil. He looked endearingly shy as he lowered

his head to the pale, silky-smooth arm Trisha offered him. His dark
eyes flicked upwards, found Parker’s in a strangely pleading glance,
and then he closed them. His nostrils fluttered as he hovered over
Trisha’s skin, less than an inch away. He was searching out the vein,
Parker realised, watching in uncomfortable but mesmerised
fascination. It was a bizarrely erotic moment, those seconds before
Josh’s soft lips parted. A flash of white showed, and he latched on to
a spot somewhere on Trisha’s arm, sinking his teeth into her willing
flesh and starting to suck immediately.

Watching him, Parker felt dizzy. He should have been disgusted at

the sight of Josh drinking blood, but all he could think of was how
luscious his lips looked where they connected with Trisha’s skin.
More like a kiss than feeding. And yet, Josh’s jaw moved in the
shallow, rhythmic motions Parker had seen before, and Parker’s
highly sensitive ears allowed him to hear the faint gushing sound of
the blood as it was sucked into Josh’s mouth. The soft noises Josh
made when he swallowed it down.

Parker let out an involuntary groan. Fuck, but he was hungry, and

the thought of all that warm, rich liquid filling his mouth, running
down his dry throat to that hollow, painfully empty spot in his belly
was indescribably tempting. For fuck’s sake, Parker! It’s blood
you’re thinking about! Human blood you wish you were drinking, not
some juice, and not even Josh’s blood, but—

“Parker?” Josh’s voice was soft, but there was a hint of urgency in

it as it yanked Parker back to the moment. Apparently Josh had
finished his meal. A tiny blob of blood was trapped in the corner of
his mouth. It looked sexy as hell.

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Parker noticed the expression of alarm on Josh’s face as he

stepped to him, grabbed him around the waist with one hand and
around the back of his head with the other, and pulled him close.
Maybe Josh was just too puzzled to protest, or maybe he was okay
with Parker’s attack, just like he had been before. Either way, his lips
parted under the harsh assault of Parker’s mouth. A soft moan
escaped him as Parker pushed his tongue into the warm crevice, and
Parker let out a moan of his own. Josh tasted good. So astonishingly
good. The metallic flavours on his tongue were mixed with so much
more, and the tastes and scents of Josh mingled with the tempting
woman’s blood sent a shock wave of both hunger and sexual desire
through Parker’s body. Again.

He gripped Josh more tightly, pressing himself against the strong,

supple body in the sudden overwhelming need for friction. He was
hard, achingly hard, and he had gone there within seconds. Josh
clearly wasn’t with him yet, but already Parker could feel the
answering press of a beginning erection grind into his own throbbing
shaft. Parker groaned. He was so hungry, but so full of need at the
same time, and he didn’t know which craving required satisfaction
first. He wanted to sink his teeth into Josh’s body and suck the blood
from him just as much as he wanted to slam his cock into him and fill
him with his own hot juice.

“Oh, fuck, Parker!” Josh’s gasp was part plea for more, part

amusement, and a lot of arousal. “Not like this, oh, hell, you need
to…ohh.” Moaning, he pressed himself to Parker again, rubbing their
groins together eagerly. His enthusiasm was obvious now, easily
transmitted by the rock-hard cock nudging Parker’s.

“I want you,” Parker choked out. Damn, he sounded desperate

even to his own ears. He was so hungry, but if he stopped to feed
now, he wouldn’t be able to fulfil this burning need reverberating
inside him. His fangs grazed velvety skin, and suddenly his tongue
was moving against Josh’s in a pool of moisture. He knew what he
had done, of course he did, but he just couldn’t stop. As before, the

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taste of Josh’s blood seemed to awaken something inside him and
make him feel alive in a way he hadn’t before. At the same time, his
hunger increased tenfold, as did his sexual appetite.

“Uh, I think I’ll just leave you guys to it,” a perplexed female

voice muttered somewhere behind him. Trisha, was it? Right, she
must have been watching. Just like some of the others probably still
were. Parker didn’t care. He couldn’t care, and more blood seeped
from Josh’s tongue. He lapped at it and tried to direct it into his
mouth, but he couldn’t get much of it. Not nearly enough, anyway.

“Nn-nn!” Josh protested, this time in earnest. Breaking the kiss, he

pulled back. His lovely mouth was smeared with blood, and Parker
had to force himself, really force himself, not to simply grab him
again. If he hadn’t known that he was no match for Josh, he might
have tried, but now all he could do was plead.

“I need it! Please, Josh,” Parker begged. “I need you. Now!”
“And you’ll get me, I promise. Shh. C’mere.” Josh tugged him

close again, holding him by the shoulders and keeping him at just a
few inches’ distance before he added, “You’ll need to focus, though.
At least a little. You can’t damage me, but I still want you to keep this
relatively sane. Or as much as we still can,” he added with a throaty
chuckle. “Try to find the main artery and puncture it, not rip it. You’ll
know if you’re in, because the blood will flow easily. Don’t worry if
you don’t get it the first time. You can try again, just please, aim not
to just gash my throat, okay?”

“Okay,” Parker promised, but only because he had to. He didn’t

care what he promised. He would have promised anything to get at
the sweet pale patch of skin on Josh’s neck. The pressure of Josh’s
hands against his shoulders eased off, and he leaned in greedily. He
could smell the blood flowing through Josh’s system, and could hear
the faint gushing noise it made on its way through the veins. His
senses were on highest alert, Parker realised. He was tingling all over
with anticipation, and all the time, his cock was throbbing in his

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trousers. Tilting his head, Josh offered him his neck, and Parker
couldn’t have held back a second longer if he’d had to.

He opened his mouth, leaned in, and slammed his teeth into Josh’s

flesh. He could feel the tissue yield under his fangs, and yes, warm
blood flooded his mouth. It must still be heated from the woman’s
body, because it was above Josh’s own body temperature, and it was
even better this way. Parker started sucking eagerly, clutching Josh in
a tight grip. Again, his cock responded to some magic connection it
seemed to share with his fangs, and soon he was rubbing it
shamelessly on Josh’s matching erection while drinking deeply. He
must have been lucky. The blood streamed fast and rich from Josh’s
artery, filling his mouth and clouding his senses with its sweet
flavours.

Josh tasted so good, so much better even than the traces of the

woman’s blood Parker had licked off him earlier, and the unyielding
pressure of his cock to Parker’s groin was efficiently wiping out the
last of Parker’s ability to think clearly. He groaned and swallowed
more blood, nearly choking on it. He should have been the one in
control, but really, he wasn’t. Not anymore. This was a ride that had
gone far wilder than what he’d expected, and it was all he could do to
cling on now. He sucked again, filling his mouth with yet more of
Josh’s delicious, hot blood, but it no longer satisfied the craving as it
had before. Or maybe he couldn’t feel it the same way because the
needy burn at his groin was so much stronger now.

Josh seemed to recognise his plea even before Parker was aware

of it. Snaking one strong arm around Parker’s waist, Josh pulled him
close, rubbing his cock on Parker’s over and over again in a hard,
inelegant, but oh so incredibly sexy dry-hump. Parker’s senses were
on overload. The blood still filling his mouth and the pressure inside
his groin, it was all becoming too much, and something just had to
give, but he didn’t know what. He couldn’t seem to stop drinking, and
his balls felt about to burst.

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Orgasm hit him with almost brutal force. He jerked in Josh’s hold,

grateful for it because he would have sagged to the floor without it.
His jaws clamped down on Josh’s neck as the spasms rocked his
body, and he could feel Josh’s scream reverberate in his fangs as
much as he heard it. Josh swayed against him, and for a horrifying
second, Parker thought he had really hurt him, but then he realised
that it was Josh’s own climax that made his legs give out. Grabbing
him, Parker tried to steady him, which was quite funny because he felt
close to passing out himself. He opened his mouth, carefully
removing his fangs from the fleshy bed they had rested in. Josh
moaned and flinched a little.

“Sorry,” Parker whispered.
“‘S okay,” Josh choked out roughly and reached for his neck. It

seemed to have stopped bleeding almost the moment Parker had
extracted his fangs.

“Was it…

are you…?” Parker started awkwardly, but there was no

way to finish the question. Dry-humping a guy until he came in his
trousers was one thing. Doing so in a room full of people while
sucking his blood was quite a different matter.

“I’m okay,” Josh whispered. “But I guess this was the last time I

got into this club.” He smirked. “Well, at least I went with a bang.
Pun intended. Come on, we should go. Clean ourselves up.”

“Okay.” Parker took a shaky step, following Josh, who was

marching off towards the door. “Is it, uh, always like this?”

Josh looked back over his shoulder with a knowing smile on his

lips. “So intense, you mean? No. It gets easier to control. But I guess
you understand now why they won’t let you do it with any of the
humans here. The first few times a vampire feeds, he’s virtually out of
control. I should have thought of that. After all, you gave me a pretty
good impression of how much it affects you earlier.” It was the first
time he acknowledged it, but he didn’t seem to be carrying any
grudges. There was still only amusement on his features.

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“Yeah, I remember. Which is part of why I’m asking. Was it like

that for you, too? The first time you fed?”

“It wasn’t when you gave me the blood bottles, but I guess you

know that. After that…yes, it was intense, but not the way you might
think it was. By the time Maurice found me, I was half starved. I
couldn’t think straight. I was desperate, and I didn’t even want to
feed. Somehow I guess I thought if I stopped drinking blood then…”
His soft, brown eyes met Parker’s, transmitting the message he
obviously didn’t want to say out loud.

Then maybe you would have taken me back. The thought was

bright and crystal clear inside Parker’s mind, just as if Josh had
indeed said it out loud. Parker swallowed around the lump in his
throat. Everything he had done, all the pain he had caused his young
lover, hadn’t stopped Josh from wanting to be with him.

“So Maurice was the one?”
Josh nodded. “Yes. He found me. He took me home, cleaned me

up and…fed me.”

“He let you drink his blood,” Parker translated.
“Yes.”
A long moment of silence passed between them while Parker was

grasping clumsily for the right words to phrase his question, but Josh
took mercy on him.

“I’m not gonna lie to you, Parker. Maurice took me to bed that

night, and he has quite a few times since. It’s never been anything like
what we had but…”

“You’re a guy, and you have needs to satisfy,” Parker finished for

him. “I know. And I could hardly expect you to be all chaste and wait
for me after what happened.”

Josh heaved a sigh. “I didn’t even know if I’d ever see you again,

and we didn’t exactly part on promising terms,” he reminded, but
without accusation.

“I know.” Go and make sure I never see you again, ’cause next

time I do, I’m going to kill you. I swear I will.

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The words rang painfully in Parker’s memory. He had been so

foolish, so blind and unfair in his hatred. And Josh, the one who had
been the last person to blame, had had to suffer the most from it.

“I’m sorry, baby,” Parker whispered numbly. “So fucking sorry.”
Josh acknowledged the apology with a weak nod. They had

reached the club’s entrance. Holding the door open, Josh said, “Uh,
listen, why don’t you wait outside while I have a quick chat with, uh,
the owner? I think we may have left a few ripples that I should
smooth over.” He waited for Parker to walk out, and the friendly
expression on his face couldn’t quite disguise that his suggestion was
indeed an order. Parker left. He didn’t feel good about leaving Josh
behind, not after what had just happened, but he didn’t have much
choice.

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Chapter 12

When Josh failed to turn up within the first ten minutes after

Parker had left the club, Parker kept his calm and told himself it was
okay. Josh had said he had something to sort out, and with his
diplomatic talent, he’d be fine sorting out new territory layouts with a
pair of tigers. When Josh hadn’t appeared after half an hour, Parker
admitted that he was getting nervous. When Josh was still inside the
club forty-five minutes after he had sent Parker outside, Parker was
done waiting.

He bounded up the stairs and vehemently knocked on the heavy

door. There was no bell button. How convenient. He pounded on the
door again. And kept pounding when there was no answer. Eventually
the bouncer who’d let them inside earlier opened and stared at Parker
unwillingly.

“Where’s Josh?” Parker snarled without further explanation.
“Huh? Who—”
“Don’t you dare claim you didn’t know exactly who I am. And

I’m fairly certain you know why I’m asking you about Josh, too,
seeing as you’re so obviously trying to hide something.”

The blank expression on the guard’s face told Parker that his tactic

had been successful. Deciding to use the element of surprise to its best
extent, he quickly pushed past the puzzled man and strode down the
long hallway to the club’s first large public room. He managed to scan
the crowd for Josh’s face, but predictably, he was nowhere to be seen,
and Parker knew better than to waste more time trying to search the
second room. During his first visit he had noticed another door in the
middle of the hallway, and this was where he was headed now, but he

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didn’t get far. A strong hand clamped down on his shoulder with
steely determination and yanked him back violently.

“Where do you think you’re going?” the guard snarled somewhere

behind Parker’s ear.

“Finding my lover,” Parker replied in what he hoped was at least

an equally menacing tone. For the first time in his life, and completely
unexpectedly, he was glad for what he had become when he saw the
guard flinch and shrink back from him. Parker realised that what he
had intended to sound like a vicious growl must have indeed come
across as one. Adding some more venom, he bounded straight into the
next round.

“Where is he?”
The guard looked uncertain, and then, apparently deciding that it

wasn’t worth getting into a fight over, he let his shoulders sag and
exhaled a sigh.

“Back room,” he answered resignedly.
“Show me,” Parker ordered. He gestured for the man to lead the

way, and after a moment’s hesitation, the guy shrugged and did as he
was told. He started in the direction Parker had assumed he’d take,
and they stopped in front of yet another anonymous, dark wooden
door.

“Should I expect any nasty surprises?” Parker asked warily.

Needless to say, something was very fishy here, but he had to find
Josh. Leaving without him just wasn’t an option.

“Well, I don’t suppose you’ll like what you’ll find, mate,” the

guard replied coldly.

“That wasn’t the question.”
The icy, eerily mocking glance the guard shot him made Parker’s

spine tingle with a sense of foreboding. In the second it took him to
resolutely yank the door open, he knew what he would find behind it.
And he was right.

Josh was sitting in a solid metal chair. His wrists and ankles were

cuffed to its sturdy steel frame with silvery wires that were barely

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thicker than a hair. Good thinking, Parker had to admit. The wires
would slice Josh’s flesh right down to the bone should he try to free
himself. They would possibly even make it through the bone. It was
an efficient way to tie up a vampire, far more so than the heavy,
impractical steel cords Parker had used in his day. However, this
wasn’t the time to reminisce or compare notes on how to hold a
vampire captive.

Right now, what mattered the most was finding a way to free the

vampire currently being held captive. Josh was in a pitiful state,
although it was impossible to tell what he had been through. His shirt
was soaked through with blood, but there wasn’t a single mark on his
flawless pale skin.

Of course not. His wounds would have healed within moments of

being inflicted. Which didn’t mean that he hadn’t felt the pain from
every single blow, cut, and bite, or wasn’t weakened from the loss of
blood. As it was, he was unconscious.

His head was tilted back at an uncomfortable angle, and the sight

inspired unwelcome memories in Parker. He’d seen Josh like this
before. Left unconscious and ready to die after being tortured.

The last pieces fell into place at the exact same moment Parker

felt the pressure of a thin wire cutting into his throat. Damn, he had
never even noticed the movement behind him.

“Don’t try to fight it,” a voice whispered somewhere next to his

right ear. “If you do, your head will come off faster than you can even
try to attack me.”

Parker knew it wasn’t an empty threat, just as he knew it wasn’t

the guard who had uttered it. He recognised the voice easily.

“Maurice, you bloody bastard!” he grumbled. “I knew you

couldn’t be trusted!”

Maurice let out a soft, annoyingly mocking chuckle. “Did you?

Well, it doesn’t change anything, I’m afraid. It’s too late. Not that you
could have changed anything if you’d figured it out earlier. Josh

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wouldn’t have believed you. He’s such a sweet, innocent, and trusting
boy. Far too trusting for his own good.”

“Yes. And you had no scruples whatsoever to abuse that trust. But

why? Why did you have to use him for your plan?”

“My plan?” Maurice sounded honestly surprised, and then his

tone became guarded as he continued, “What do you know about my
plan?”

“Well, it’s quite obvious, actually,” Parker said acidly. “I only

wish I had indeed figured it out sooner. You were not after that
vampire gang because they’re a danger to humans. You want them
gone because they are a danger to you.”

“Really? That’s what you’re thinking?”
“Yes. And I know I’m right about it, too. They’re your gang,

aren’t they? And I bet you used to be their leader. What happened,
were they no longer happy with the way you ruled? Were they
beginning to develop scruples about killing off innocent humans after
all?”

Maurice’s hesitation to answer gave him away.
“I’m right, aren’t I?” Parker continued. “Just why did you have to

get Josh involved in this?”

“Can’t you guess?” Maurice replied at last, coldly. “They were

there. I knew they would remember him. They helped create him,
after all. You know, there is a connection between every vampire and
the one who made him—his sire. This connection will always be
there. It will always draw him to his sire, and it will always make him
choose his sire’s side. That, more than anything, is the reason Josh
would never have believed you. And even if he had, he would never
have turned against me.”

For a frightening, blinding moment, the world seemed to spin

madly around Parker while his vision turned black. “You…you made
Josh? You are the one who turned him?”

“Yes. I’m his sire. It’s why he found me so easily after you

wouldn’t have him any longer and kicked him out. The poor thing

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was in such a state when I found him.” Maurice’s voice turned even
colder, even crueller, if that was possible at all. He sounded as if he
was enjoying sharing his story immensely.

“He was half-starved, hadn’t allowed himself to feed in days

because he thought it was part of what made you hate him and if only
he could stop drinking blood, you could forget what he was.” He let
out a low, nasty chuckle. “Tell me, Parker, what’s it like knowing that
you’re the one who spoiled him forever when you gave him up back
then? The poor sod was so foolishly, deeply in love with you, it was
ridiculous. All the time I bled him dry, he kept screaming for you to
help him. Your name was the last thing he said before he lost
consciousness. He was the sweetest, purest boy I’d ever seen while he
was with you, but when you sent him away, you as good as destroyed
him. That night he found me, after you had kicked him out—he was
so sweet then. So full of need. So longing to be filled, in every way. I
fed him my blood while I fucked the feel of you right out of him, the
way I have almost every night since. And all this time he has still
been in love with you, but he has never once allowed himself to
mention you. Not a single time in the three years he’s been catering to
every single one of my fantasies. Tell me, how does it feel to know
that I’ve had him in ways you could only ever dream of?”

Parker was shaking all over. His fangs were out, drawing blood

where they were puncturing his own bottom lip. Two hard, unyielding
weapons that were entirely useless. He knew Maurice’s speech was
mostly a way to make him react, a means to make him delve into a
blind attack that he wouldn’t survive. Not that Maurice couldn’t just
kill him right on the spot anyway. But Maurice clearly didn’t want to
make it that easy for Parker. He wanted to play and make him suffer
first. Hurt him by taunting him with the memories of what he had lost.
And guilt.

The guilt Parker had been living with for years, even though he

had been trying to block it out. But it was still there, and Maurice was
succeeding. Parker felt an unknown rage build inside him, far stronger

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than anything he had ever experienced. Finding his family slaughtered
had filled him with a numbing sadness, above all, and the wish for
revenge. Finding Josh on the verge to becoming a vampire had hurt
him to the very core of his existence, but again, it had made him
mostly sad. But knowing that Maurice, the very demon who had taken
Josh’s life and his future as the charming man he had been supposed
to grow into, hadn’t stopped there but used and abused his body and
soul even afterward, filled him with a burning, bright flame of
irrational fury.

Grappling for the last shreds of self-control he could cling to,

Parker forced himself to sound calm as he said, “It fucking sucks.” He
pulled a face. “No pun intended, but speaking of which, what have
you done to Josh?”

He could feel Maurice’s shrug in the light tug at the wire around

his throat. “Just that. Sucked the blood out of him. Not that you’d left
much. Poor thing, he was rather weak already when he walked in here
and didn’t stand much chance, but then again, he wouldn’t have put
up much of a fight anyway. Not against me.”

“So what does that mean? Is he dead now?” Parker forced himself

to ask. Josh couldn’t be dead, could he? Not while he was still looking
so…alive. Well, as alive as a vampire could look.

“Not quite,” Maurice replied conversationally. “He’s in a state

that could best be compared to a coma. Basically, his system is shut
down, so he doesn’t need to consume any energy. It’s what a
vampire’s body does to protect itself so as not to die from starvation.”

“So he won’t die if he doesn’t get any blood soon?”
“No. In theory, he could stay like this forever, but he can’t get out

of it without help.” There was a nasty sneer in Maurice’s tone, and the
pressure of the wire to Parker’s skin grew stronger. “Don’t get your
hopes up, Parker. You’re not going to be the one who saves him.”

“Why didn’t you just kill him?”
“Oh, I don’t really know, to be honest. I’ll just leave him like this

for a while. Until I have made up my mind about what to do with him.

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You see, I’ve grown quite used to having him around and he makes
for a nice toy to play with, but lately he’s become a bit of a nuisance.
Ever since you turned up, to be precise. I guess I’ll just see what it’s
like if he’s gone. If I find I miss his company after all, I can still get
him back again. I’m sure when he has understood that you’re gone
once and for all, he’ll be only too happy to be my tame little pet again.
Or maybe I’ll just leave him the way he is and use him as a toy. At
least then I wouldn’t have to put up with his issues while enjoying
his…assets.” He paused then let out a contented moan. “Yeah, maybe
I’ll do just that. Mmh, he really has a body to die for, hasn’t he?”

That was more than Parker could take. “You fucking son of a

bitch!” he roared, and every muscle in his body tensed to get ready for
a fight that had long since become inevitable. A last, desperate
attempt at a battle he didn’t stand a chance to win.

And he wouldn’t win, he realised as he felt the thin wire cut into

his flesh. Moisture gushed out and over his chest, and of course he
knew what it was. It should have been warm, really, but just as Josh’s
blood had tasted cool when Parker had sucked it out of him, Parker’s
own blood now was just about room temperature. He raised his hands
in an instinctive urge to defend himself, but even as his fingers
clenched around the vicelike grip of Maurice’s fists on the steel cable,
he knew it was futile. Maurice, the very impersonation of evil
vampire, would win this time, too. And there was nothing Parker
could do to stop him. Nothing to stop him from chopping off his head,
nothing to stop him from using Josh’s body for his sick games,
whether Josh was conscious or not.

Parker’s own body sagged to the floor. The pull on the steel string

had loosened, and his legs were unable to hold him up. His head
seemed to still be attached, at least partly, but he was too disoriented
to be able to tell for certain. For all he knew, it could have been
severed indeed, and lolling around on the floor without any
connection to his torso. The mere thought made him feel sick, which
was good, because if he could feel sick, then his brain must still have

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a connection to his stomach, right? He was being illogical, he knew it,
but he was just so confused. Why had Maurice let go of him? He’d
been determined to kill Parker, hadn’t he? There was no point in
letting him live any longer. Surely he had succeeded in hurting and
humiliating Parker in every possible way by now, or what could there
be left to say to make his regret and emotional turmoil yet worse?

Parker would have loved to ask those questions out loud, and

maybe he did, but his ears were filled with strange, gushing noises
and what sounded like the indistinct chatter of voices. Angry voices,
by their tone, but he couldn’t make out their words. His head ached
and throbbed, but above all, he was so crushingly tired all of a
sudden. A bone-deep fatigue had gripped him, dragging him along on
a path to a black, bottomless pit somewhere a little bit further down
the line.

Realising he was about to lose consciousness, Parker struggled to

open his eyes, but he couldn’t. His eyelids seemed to have lead
weights attached to them, and the gushing, whitewashed noise in his
ears blocked him from what was left of the world. And maybe it was
good that way. He had never imagined the end to be anything like
this. He’d been hoping for it to come when he would be trapped in a
situation that simply allowed him no escape other than to take himself
out fast and clean, along with the demons he was battling. It shouldn’t
be like this. Josh was as good as dead, and entirely at the mercy of the
most inhumanely cruel person Parker had ever met, while he himself
didn’t stand a chance to survive. He would have loved to at least take
a very evil vampire with him, but now all that was left to do for
Parker was letting go. When the black, bottomless pit suddenly gaped
widely right in front of him, he had no defences left. Letting go of the
last thread of sanity he had, he allowed the darkness to swallow him
up whole. At least there would be no pain anymore, he hoped. It was
the last thought he could remember having.

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Chapter 13

Parker was lying in a heavenly soft, comfortable bed. The linens

were cool against his skin, and it was mercifully quiet. The
overwhelming noise in his ears had stopped at last, and it seemed to
still be dark around him. Dark. Quiet. Eerily quiet. Soft, plush
cushions. What did you expect? Josh’s voice rang somewhere in the
depths of his memories. A coffin?

Was that where he was? In a coffin? Left to—to what exactly?

Maurice had told him a vampire’s body shut down if it lost too much
blood so it wouldn’t die. A state that could best be compared to a
coma…could stay like this forever…can’t get out of it without help.

Those were the things Maurice had told him, weren’t they? Was

that his monstrous plan? Leave not only poor Josh in this frightful
state of immobility, but Parker, too? And if he, Parker, was aware of
his situation, did that mean that Josh was also conscious? Conscious,
but locked up inside his own body, unable to move and defend
himself? “Maybe I just leave him the way he is and use him as a toy.
At least then I wouldn’t have to put up with his issues while enjoying
his…assets. Yeah, maybe I’ll do just that. Mmh, he really has a body
to die for, hasn’t he?”

Once again, Maurice’s words sent a cold shudder of unspeakable

horror through Parker’s insides. In a coma or not, he couldn’t allow
for that to happen. He couldn’t allow this monster to hurt Josh any
more than he already had, couldn’t allow for him to ever touch Josh
again. Maybe, if he could still think, there was something he could do.
If he wasn’t just a disembodied head after all, that was. Parker tried to
move his finger. It seemed to work, so he tried to move his hand. That

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seemed to work, too. He tried to open his eyes again, and that did also
work, but he quickly squeezed them shut again. The room around him
wasn’t dark. Far from it. It was brightly lit, so much so that the light
hurt Parker’s eyes. Why was there light if he was supposed to be in a
coma? He had a horrifying vision of himself in a coffin, put on
display in some part of that creepy vampire club for everyone to see.
A trophy, a sign of triumph. A final, terrible way of Maurice to mock
him.

Parker wasn’t going to let him have that satisfaction. He didn’t

need to see where he was, he just needed to get away. Contrary to
what Maurice had said, his body seemed to still obey him, and within
seconds, Parker was thrashing around frantically. His hands were
hitting something solid. Repeatedly. Of course. That would be the
side walls of the coffin. He had to get out of that first. He tried to push
himself up on his elbows and find something for his hands to hold on
to, but suddenly there was another pair of hands, strong ones, that
pressed him back down.

Parker yelled in fright and anger, but no sound would come out.

Or could that pitiful, high-pitched shriek be his own shout? He
struggled against the hold, but it was pointless. The hands were too
strong, and they were merciless. They were not going to let him out,
no matter how hard he fought. Maybe Maurice had underestimated
him. Maybe Parker hadn’t lost as much blood as the vampire had
thought and that was why he had regained consciousness. If that was
the reason, then at least Josh was likely to really be in a coma, without
any knowledge of what was happening around him or to him, the way
Maurice had claimed it was. Parker could only hope for it to be true,
and hopefully he would know soon. Maurice would certainly not
make the same mistake a second time. Understanding that he was
doomed, indeed, Parker gave up. He let the hands push him down
without resistance. Any second now, he would feel a cut, or possibly a
bite. Some injury to draw the last of his blood from him.

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When he felt the soft pressure of satiny, cool skin to his lips

instead, he nearly jolted in surprise. He could smell the blood flowing
in the veins underneath, and could even feel the feeble rhythmic throb
of it pulsing against his lips. He didn’t need to think twice. In fact, he
didn’t seem to think once. His fangs were out without him being able
to tell if he had given the order or even permission for them to do so,
and a second later, warm, rich blood filled his mouth. It was delicious.
Rolling over his tongue like the smoothest, sweetest wine he had ever
tasted, it poured down his throat. Gosh, he hadn’t even realised how
dried out he had been. Not just his throat, but his entire body.

He drank deeply, swallowed every drop that spilled out of this

wonderful vein, and then, when the rich flow lessened and threatened
to run dry, he clamped his jaw down and started sucking. A soft,
familiar chuckle caressed his tormented ears.

“Easy, love. I’m more than happy to let you have as much as you

want, but I’m still a bit shaky myself.”

Parker stopped drinking instantly. Not because he had been told to

do so, but because he needed to open his eyes. He needed to see to be
able to believe it was Josh standing there in front of him. And it was.
The blinding light was gone. Only Josh was there, sitting on the side
of a normal bed, not a coffin, and looking perfectly whole and hearty.
Beautiful as ever. The mere sight of him moving and smiling made
tears well up in Parker’s eyes. They were blurring his vision. Trying
to blink them away, he turned his head so Josh wouldn’t see. His gaze
fell on the wall, and he recognised the pattern of the wallpaper
instantly. They were in Josh’s bedroom.

“Where…how…what happened?” Parker managed to choke out at

last. He’d let go of Josh’s arm, and the small wounds his bite had left
were disappearing again already. And yet, Josh was looking
uncomfortable and a bit as if he was hurting.

“Well, there are some blanks, which you can probably fill in a lot

better than I can,” he said a little unwillingly. “But I suppose you’re
mostly interested in what happened after you passed out.”

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“Right. How come you—we—are here? Last time I saw you, you

were…” Parker left the sentence unfinished. Josh had winced at his
words, and it wasn’t hard to guess why.

“How on earth did we make it out of there alive?” Parker

rephrased. Again, Josh looked uncomfortable. He shifted his weight
and ran his fingers through his hair in little, insignificant gestures to
buy himself time. And when he finally answered, Parker understood
where his hesitation was coming from.

“Believe it or not,” Josh slowly started to explain, “but we owe

our lives to the very people you have been trying to kill for all those
years.”

“What?”
“Yes.” Josh made a face. “Maurice’s gang. Or former gang,

rather. They had excellent timing when they came to settle their bill
once and for all.”

“They were there?”
“Uh-huh.”
“What exactly do you mean by settle their bill?”
“They killed…him.”
“Maurice, you mean?”
Again, Josh winced at the mention of the name. “Yes.”
Parker needed a moment before he could make himself say the

words, but somehow at least he managed to sound astonishingly
sincere. “I’m sorry.”

Josh, who had been staring at some indefinite spot on the wall so

far, finally turned his head to meet Parker’s eyes. He looked
surprised. “What for?”

This time it was Parker who couldn’t quite suppress the wince.

“You guys were lovers, after all. I’m sure there were some feelings
involved, and I guess no matter what he did, it must be…hard to know
that he is dead.”

Josh nodded pensively. “Feelings. Right. Yes, there were feelings

involved.” His brown eyes were still holding Parker’s gaze, but when

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Parker couldn’t bear the soft, deep stare of them any longer and tried
to look away, Josh raised his hand. Tucking a finger under Parker’s
chin, he gently tilted his head to make Parker face him again. “But it
was never love, Parker. I’ve never loved him, not for a minute. Never
the way I’ve loved you since the first time we met.”

Parker groaned. “Josh, how can you possibly claim you still love

me after everything that’s happened? After everything I’ve done?
You’ve become a vampire because of me. And as if that wasn’t bad
enough, I’ve chased you back into the arms of the fucking bastard
who made you and–and has abused you for years,” he blurted out.

Josh jerked as if beaten. He turned white underneath his natural

pallor. “The bastard who made me,” he repeated hollowly. “So you
know about that, huh?”

“Yes.” Parker nodded and reached out to take Josh’s hand

between his own. “I’m sorry.” Looking at Josh’s pain-filled, drained
face, he knew that this time, he meant it. “You didn’t know, did you?”

“No. I didn’t,” Josh confirmed with a sigh. “Bill told me when

they…after they killed him.”

“I’m afraid I still don’t really understand what happened,” Parker

said softly when it appeared that Josh wasn’t going to continue talking
of his own accord. “Care to fill me in?”

“Well, I guess you deserve to know.” Josh sounded still unwilling,

but he kept talking. “They were a gang. A coven. It had started out
with Maurice and Bill. They used to be lovers, or mates with benefits,
something like that. Apparently, Maurice had always been inclined to
cruelty. He considered our kind superior and believed we should be
allowed to feed on humans whenever we wanted to. Bill claims one of
the reasons he’d started spending time with Maurice was because he
wanted to keep him from doing too much harm.” He shrugged. “I’m
not sure how much truth there is in that. I’m fairly certain he has done
his share of evil, too, but I believe him when he says that he’s never
tortured humans for the sake of inflicting pain. Maurice was different.
He enjoyed hurting people and playing with them. A bit like a cat that

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plays with a mouse before he kills it. Anyway, the rest of the gang
consisted of young vampires the two of them had sired. Somehow
they had always considered Maurice more as their leader than Bill.
Bill says he had been trying to keep him in check as best he could,
and even threatened to leave him if he didn’t stop hurting and killing
people, but Maurice didn’t care. He called Bill’s bluff one night.” A
shadow crossed his face. “It was the night they killed your family.”

Parker closed his eyes, trying to keep his anger from rising. He

had known that Maurice was the killer from the moment he had made
the connection. Hearing Josh say it out loud now didn’t change
anything, and besides, the killer was dead now. Or at least one of
them was. “They? So this Bill really helped him kill my…family?” he
made himself ask.

“Parker, I know what you’re thinking.” Josh sounded so

compassionate and so full of understanding. How could he if he had
let a murderer get away? “From what Bill told me, he and the others
didn’t arrive until the worst part was over. They—” He broke off and
swallowed, as if he needed to keep the bile from rising. Or maybe
because he didn’t know whether or not to give Parker the gruesome
details.

“Tell me,” Parker ordered gruffly.
“They were beyond saving. Bill and the others only helped kill

them when they realised they couldn’t rescue them, and finishing
what Maurice had started would be the greater mercy than letting
them live only to suffer even longer. I’m sorry, Parker. So terribly
sorry. I—”

Parker held up his hand. “Don’t. Just—don’t.” The words had

been sharp, far gruffer than he’d intended for them to be, and now he
was staring at Josh guiltily, numbly looking into those big, gentle dark
eyes. Even now, there was no accusation in them and no anger, just
quiet acceptance and understanding.

“I’m sorry,” Parker said awkwardly. “I didn’t mean to be harsh on

you. It’s just that, for all those years, I’ve been wondering what

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happened that night. How they died. But I don’t think I really want to
know. Not now. Not when…” Not when you’re the one who tells me.
I can’t hear those words coming out of your mouth. You’ve been
through so much already, and I just couldn’t ask that of you. And I
don’t want your voice connected with those memories, that terrible
knowledge either. I couldn’t stand seeing those images, knowing you
heard about all of it. I may not be making sense, but it’s the only thing
I can still protect you from. The only horror I can ask you to not go
through for my sake.

He knew he hadn’t said any of it aloud, but to his surprise, Josh

nodded as if he had heard and understood every word. “I know,” Josh
said softly. “I know.”

Parker was tempted to ask him the obvious, but decided against it.

Potentially mind-reading vampires was another topic he just didn’t
have the courage to face right now, although the soft, knowing smile
on Josh’s lips told him that maybe he already knew the answer
anyway. Not now.

Still smiling, Josh inclined his head in a tiny, almost imperceptible

nod.

“Anyway,” he said after a moment of silence. “After that, Bill and

the others made sure to keep Maurice in check. They wouldn’t let him
out of their sight and didn’t allow him to feed off humans anymore for
fear he’d use it as a chance to kill again. For ten years, they wouldn’t
let him alone for even as long as a minute. Ironically, when you were
chasing them and got too close, it was what made them slip. They
took the risk of letting Maurice unguarded because they needed to
find a new hiding place. Maurice, of course, seized his chance. He
must have overheard the others when they were talking about how
they thought you had lost some of your grit because of your affection
for me. So, being the sadist he was, Maurice decided to go after me to
teach you and his mates a lesson. Bill didn’t know how long Maurice
had been alone with me, but well, you saw the mess he left. They
were planning to take me away somewhere safe so I could turn, and

Newborn 171

 

then they would have accepted me into their group and taught me
what I needed to know, but you got to the farm and snatched me away
while they were still busy dealing with Maurice.”

“And when I threw you out after you’d turned, you unwaveringly

walked back into the arms of your sire,” Parker finished for him.

“Yes. Exactly. He had managed to escape and left a false trail for

them. By the time they realised he had fooled them, he had taken me
and himself out of the country and assumed a false identity that
allowed him to live in peace.”

“A veritable happy ever after,” Parker commented sarcastically.
“Yes. Almost. But Maurice was becoming greedy and foolhardy.

He wanted to be a someone in the vampire world again, so he started
building his reputation as a great friend of humankind and someone
who wanted to see humans and vampires live together in peace. His
plan worked astonishingly well, and, in fact, not all of it was bad, I
think. The club, for instance, isn’t a bad thing as such. There’s no
denying that vampires need blood, and there are humans who are only
too willing to give it, because they feel attracted to us. Maurice had
realised that, and he created places where this was possible. Several of
those clubs have been founded in the past couple of years, and they’re
becoming popular. Obviously, it seems that Maurice’s plan was to
eventually turn some of those clubs into places where he would
enslave humans and let the vampires who share his inclinations not
only feed but play with their food as well.” He shuddered. “I think he
was about to turn our club here into such a place. Trisha had told me
she suspected there was something fishy going on, but she didn’t
know anything for certain, and, of course, Maurice knew better than
to let me spend too much time away from him.”

“He really had quite a strong hold over you, didn’t he?”
Josh nodded. “Yes. And now that I know he was my sire, I

understand why. It’s not an easy thing to explain, Parker. There is a
special connection, even if we don’t want to acknowledge it. Or don’t
even know about it. But it exists nonetheless, and it’s incredibly

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strong. I found that out when he attacked me in the club. I knew what
he was going to do and I knew I had to fight him off or he would kill
me, but I couldn’t. All I could do was stand there and wait for him to
tie me to that chair and…” Another shudder rocked him, and he
closed his eyes. “Knowing I’d put my trust in him during all this time
hurt more than anything he’s ever done to me.”

“Fuck, Josh,” Parker sighed and leaned forward to wrap his arms

around Josh. “I’m so sorry. He hurt you in bed, too, didn’t he?”

“Well, no. Not as such. It wasn’t as though he raped me or

something like that. But he liked playing rough, and I…I just went
along with it.” He heaved a sigh. “I’m a vampire, Parker. My body
doesn’t keep track of marks.”

“I know,” Parker whispered into the silky mop of Josh’s dark hair.

“But your soul does, just like anybody else’s.” Just like mine. But I
will help you wipe away every single mark he has left on your soul.
Together we can take the bitter memories this monster has left inside
our heads and our hearts. We can replace them with new ones. If
you’ll still have me after everything I put you through. If you can still
love me after all the pain I caused you. What do you think? Can we
start over and make up for all this time we’ve lost already?

Leaning back a little, Josh raised his head. His dark eyes were

unreadable as they locked with Parker’s, but when a second later their
mouths found each other in a surprisingly tender kiss, Parker realised
he didn’t need to read his lover’s eyes anymore.

You know I still love you, Parker. It’s only ever been you. In my

heart and in my soul. Only you. You always have been and always
will be my one and only true love. And yes. Vampires can read minds.

THE END

WWW.SAGE-MARLOWE.COM

 

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

I’ve been dreaming about writing a book for, well, ever. But as it

is so often with dreams, reality got in the way in the shape of a mind-
numbing day job and an enormous lack of inspiration.

Then—rather unexpectedly, I admit—a very generous muse made

an appearance in my life, hand in hand with an incredibly persistent
character’s appearance in my head. They just wouldn’t be ignored,
and although it came as a bit of a surprise that said character was gay,
it explains a lot.

From that night on, writing took on a dynamic of its own. I’ve

become the willing slave to all those fascinating characters who want
their stories told and keep turning up sometimes faster than I can take
notes. This has resulted in several manuscripts at various stages of
completion, so I’m always working on clearing some much-needed
headspace and giving all the gorgeous guys who live in there the
happy ever afters they deserve.

My characters often have a dramatic, sometimes even traumatic,

past and have to overcome some mostly internal conflicts to be with
the one they love. The fact that they tend to get quite a bit of naughty
action along the way is, well, a very nice side effect.

For all titles by Sage Marlowe, please visit

www.bookstrand.com/sage-marlowe

 

 

Siren Publishing, Inc.

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