The last time I'd been here, I was seven years old. A little girl with big
ideas. Those big ideas had become a weight around my neck and had
eventually made me drown. This house was my lifeline. It had rescued
me when I needed it the most. My mother said I was running away and
all marriages needed to be worked at. That's when I'd dropped the
bombshell. How could I work on a marriage when I was the wrong sex
for my husband? I lacked a certain appendage to make him happy.
Mother had gaped like a freaking goldfish, and I'd left, runaway,
whatever, to start my new life.

My job wasn't a problem. I was a writer and as long as I had pen, paper
and internet access, I was fine. Yes, I still used pen and paper. It always
seemed to flow better when I actually wrote with something, as opposed
to typing it. So, my location didn't matter for my work. I had nothing to
keep me in Seattle. My friends had been Tyler's friends, and they had
taken sides in the divorce. None of them had been on my side. Even
though I was the one that had been lied to and cheated on, I was the
one that now had to be avoided. It would have been comical, if it wasn't

1. Chapter 1: Decisions

so tragic. It's something you read about in advice columns, and not
something I had imagined when I had donned the white meringue and
said 'I do' in front of two hundred guests. Nor was finding said husband
on his knees in front of the local bar owner.

That was behind me now. I refused to be brought down anymore by
something I couldn't change, so I shook my head of the memories, and
took in the old rundown house. It needed a complete remodel, but I
would use the money from my divorce settlement to pay for it. I was
going to make this a fresh start.

New life.

New Bella.

Granddad Aro had died eight months ago, but there had been legal
problems with his estate, and only now was the house officially mine.
That had pissed Mom off too, but she hadn't seen her father in at least
fifteen years. I rolled my eyes, because that was another story entirely. I
didn't hide my excitement from her when it had been signed over to me.
She had walked out on my happy dance wittering about the fact that it
should have been given to her. I'd brushed off her tantrum, I was used
to them. The house and land were now mine.

I was excited, if not a little apprehensive about living on my own. I didn't
even know if I would like it here, but it was perfect for me right now. The
isolation was what I needed to fix my fucked up life. I'd always lived in
the city, so La Push was like the middle of nowhere to me. From where I
stood I could see the beach as it stretched along the boundary to my
land. Calling it mine still made me giddy.

I'd missed this house; the eerie silence that always surrounded it. All
you could hear was the tide as it came to meet the shore, and the rustle
of the wind in the trees. I walked slowly towards the beach, and slipped
off my chucks. I wanted to feel the sand as it seeped between my toes.
It had been so long.

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The wind whipped harshly across the shore, causing my hair to slip
from its barrette and fly around my face. I shivered and rubbed my
arms. I'd been warm in my truck and had taken my hoodie off. I was
now freezing in a thin cotton t-shirt. I hadn't even been thinking of the
cold. The water had beckoned me. I inhaled the salty sea air, as I
looked out across the beach. It was deserted, and I instinctively
checked my watch. It was very early morning, just after seven, so the
emptiness didn't surprise me. I had been driving through the night,
eager to get here. It already felt like home, and I hadn't even stepped
into the house.

I knew I had to get the electricity hooked back up, and I only had my
cell, which was patchy here, but I could deal with cold showers for a
couple of days. I had called the electricity company before I left and
knew they would be here on Monday. The telephone company had said
Wednesday. I had gas, so could boil water to wash and clean the
house. I just wondered what kind of stove Granddad had owned. I was
prepared to have to replace everything.

I sighed and turned, intending to return to my car and unpack my
belongings, but was stopped by a huge golden haired dog. It bounded
towards me wagging its tail, and kicking wet sand in my direction. I
braced myself for impact, but it stopped in front of me and sat down,
panting. It looked friendly enough, so I tentatively moved my hand to
stroke his head.

"Hey, boy. You out here alone?"

Great, isolation was getting to me already. I was talking to a dog and
expecting it to answer. I tickled its ears and began to walk away, but it
followed me.

Hey, Swan, five minutes in a new place and you already have a friend!

I brushed the sand from the soles of my feet, as I reached the edge of
the beach at the start of my garden. I held onto the crumbling wooden

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fence, so as not to fall on my face and put my shoes back on. The dog
never left my side. I tried to shoo him away, waving my arms frantically,
but he sat and stared like I was crazy. So now I was trying to ignore
him, hoping he would get bored and find his owner, or run back home.

I hissed in pain as my arm swiped a thorny bush. I rubbed the slightly
torn skin, and hoped I'd brought some antiseptic with me. The garden
was completely overgrown with weeds and thorns. I would need to
landscape the garden too. I started to feel a little overwhelmed. There
was so much to do outside the house I was now dreading what awaited
me on the inside of it. Maybe I had bitten off much more than I could
chew? Pushing the thought aside I pulled the door to my truck open,
grabbed my purse and rummaged for the front door keys. The damn
dog was sat on the porch when I started to walk up the steps. There
was no way I was adding a pet to my list of things that pissed mother
off. I needed to look after myself, and he needed to go home.

I opened the mesh screen, noting the huge hole in the top half, and slid
my key into the lock. The door creaked as I pushed it, sending chills
down my spine. I had to remind myself that I was not Neve Campbell,
and this was not another Scream movie. The place smelt stale, but not
like what I would have expected after eight months of desertion. It
smelled of beer and a faint cooking smell. I stepped warily inside and
was greeted with a complete bombsite. Someone had been living here
other than my Granddad. Cigarette butts littered the over flowing
ashtrays, beer cans lay scattered around the room, along with old
newspapers and magazines. My heart began to pound as I surveyed
the mess. I was both angry and pissed off. It looked like whoever had
been here gave no care to the fact that it wasn't their home and just
dropped rubbish wherever they pleased. I had expected layers of dust
and sheets over the furniture, but the sheets had been discarded, and
someone had definitely cleaned the counters and surfaces. I groaned
and picked up the nearest newspaper, checking the date on the top. It
was dated two weeks ago, so I hunted around, checking the dates on all
the others ones. The most recent one I could find was only four days
ago. The dog barked outside, making me jump almost out of my skin

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and drop the papers. They scattered across the already messy floor. My
eyes settled on a magazine poking out from the couch cushions. I
pulled it from its resting place and giggled.

Porn.

Whoever had been sleeping here enjoyed naked woman with big tits.

Nice!

I wouldn't even consider sitting on the threadbare couch now. I
assumed, given the state of my house, he wouldn't have wiped up the
end product of his porn perusal. Ergh!

I absently chucked it into the empty trash can. Oh, yes, the fucking thing
was empty, and started to pick up random bits of rubbish, throwing them
into it also. When I realized I was making no dent in the pit, I decided to
go and check out the rest of the house. I was anxious to see what more
destruction greeted me. I sidestepped the discarded fast food
containers and beer bottles and made my way into the small kitchen. It
was better than I had imagined, but then my houseguest appeared to
like take-out rather than cooking. The sink was full of dirty plates and
the counter covered in mouldy tea bags and coffee grains. I made a
mental note that there was no refrigerator. That was something I
needed to purchase almost immediately. I'd never lived without one
before, and it seemed odd that Granddad never had one.

It stank in here and there was more evidence of his alcohol and nicotine
addiction. Groaning, I made my way back through the living area and up
the small stairs to check out the only bedroom and the bathroom.

I was startled, to say the least, when I cautiously opened the bathroom
door. I had expected mould, scum and general grossness, but it was
pristine. So the 'guest' had some level of cleanliness. I took note again,
of the lack of shower. It only held a small bath, a sink and the toilet. I
could fit a shower in over the bath. There was a beautifully large window

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1. Chapter 1: Decisions

in the room. I could imagine lounging in a warm bubble bath with some
wine and looking out onto the beach.

I smiled, apart from my unexpected visitor, I loved this place. I could
imagine it with my things and in my style. Simple and feminine, nobody
else's garbage to ruin it all. I snorted and turned to check out the last
room. I was, again, worried about the state I would find it in, but it
couldn't be as bad as the living room. At least that's what I kept telling
myself, as I pushed the door open.

I was so very wrong.

A naked man lay in the crumpled bed. My bed. He was fast asleep, and
lay on his front.

Clothes were scattered around the floor and a single white sheet hung
from the bed. The bed where the man slept.

Did I mention he was naked?

I gasped, but he didn't move. I couldn't stop my perusal of his body. He
was stunning, and certainly not what I would have imagined from
someone living the way he was doing. I scanned upwards from his feet
to his toned calves, up over his thighs and his cute white ass. At that
point I checked he was still unconscious before going back to my
appreciation of his body. His skin was lightly tanned and I could make
out a tattoo on his right shoulder. It looked like script of some kind, but I
wasn't close enough to decipher it. His arm was underneath his face,
using it as a pillow.

I studied his face. Even crumpled from sleep he was extremely
handsome, with his chiselled jaw and cheekbones. His hair was in a
state of disarray, but the color stunned me. It was an intense bronze,
with red and gold highlights. My fingers itched to run through it, and I
balled my hands into fists.

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The thought of touching a perfect stranger in such a way disturbed me.
I'd obviously gone without sex too damn long. Not that sex with Tyler
had been satisfying anyway, most of the time I finished myself off after
he left the bed to clean up. Why was I thinking about this? I had a naked
man; a naked stranger in my bed!

I must have made some sort of noise because he snorted and turned
over in the bed. He lay on his back scrubbing his face with his hands. I
gasped and clutched my hand to my mouth. He was sporting the largest
erection I had ever laid eyes on. I felt a flush stain my cheeks as I
continued to stare and my temperature rose exponentially. Sweat
formed on my brow, but I still could not tear my gaze from it. It was
incredible.

"Like what you see?" Came a gravely voice from further up the erection.

Shit, I'd woken him up, and he'd caught me checking out his dick. Could
it get any worse?

I realized it could when he climbed from the bed and stood before me,
oblivious to his lack of attire, or his arousal. His intense green eyes
assessed me, doing the exact same thing with my body as I had done
to him just moments earlier. He worked his way from my chucks up to
my face and then he moved his gaze back to my chest.

"You don't seem to be wearing a bra," he stated in a very matter of fact
way, still taking in my erect nipples.

I glared at him. What the hell? He was in my house, trashing my rooms
and sleeping naked in my bed. Yet he called me out for my lack of
underwear?

"Don't you have anything to say, Bella?" he asked.

"You...you know my name? How?" I stuttered.

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I watched him lick his lips slowly, before he moved closer and
whispered in my ear.

"I've seen you stripped, wet and screaming my name, Bella. I'm hurt
you don't remember me."

With that declaration, he left me gaping, and walked from the room.

What the fuck just happened, and who the hell was he?

Gah! There you go... chp1.

So, I'll update when I can, usually weekly, and it's going to be fluffy
and lemony...

Let me know what y'all think. I'd really love to hear it.

xxxx

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2. Chapter 2: Waiting

WOW! I'm utterly blown away by the response this has gotten
already. I admit to being a little daunted too...

Thanks to hunterhunting- calming my nerves, and being there
when I was about to throw up :D

Beautiful Disaster/Violi has started a Twilighted thread - so come
and say Hi!

Thank you to my amazing beta team of Maylin & Twirlgrrl. I love
you ladies.

Caren/nerac has deemed him Erectionward...so here he is...

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward is all mine...yummy.

"I've seen you stripped, wet and screaming my name, Bella. I'm hurt
you don't remember me."

EPOV

Shit, shit, shit!

She was here. In the house. Aro had been so certain she would come,
but as the years passed and there was no sign of her, my faith began to
diminish. She wouldn't be happy with the living arrangements, but who
gave a fuck? Aro had decided our fate long ago, and she would just
have to accept it.

I filled the sink and scrubbed my face vigorously. I needed to get a grip
and wake the hell up. I thought I was still dreaming when I'd seen her
standing in my room. I was shocked but kept my cool as much as I
could. She had changed; matured, but those eyes were still the same.

2. Chapter 2: Waiting

Big, brown doe eyes. They had always looked too large for her petite
face, but as soon as you looked into their depths you simply got lost. At
least I always did.

I hadn't been lying when I told her it hurt that she didn't remember me. It
stung. Having waited for her for so long, I couldn't stop imagining our
reunion. The bedroom scene was not how it had played out in my head.
Had I been stupid, pining for a girl I lost my heart to as a boy? Was Aro
just trying to keep me here, dangling the cherry that was Isabella in my
face?

I washed languidly, knowing the time I was taking would piss her off. It
was also giving me time to regroup. She had grown into a stunning
woman, and very suited to her 'Swan' surname.

She's Crowley now, you moron!

Aro and I had followed her career over the years, and kept many of the
columns she wrote in a scrapbook. He had always been so proud of
her. Aro had a photograph of her wedding hung on the wall. The
magazine she was working for at the time had published the very same
picture. I had cut it out and cherished it. Even then he was certain she
would return. I'd lost hope at that time. Staring at her smiling at another
man, in her huge white dress, was torture. I had always considered her
as mine, so seeing those eyes filled with emotion for someone else
crippled me. Aro and I had argued that night. I had considered leaving,
because he was so adamant in his belief. I called him a foolish old man,
and he laughed loudly agreeing. He would always tell me she wasn't
one of them, she was like us, and wouldn't be tied down by a city
lifestyle.

I missed him terribly.

When the funeral passed and she still hadn't arrived, I had truly given
up hope. The Will had been read and months later she had still not
returned. It was only then that I had accepted Aro really had been

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wrong. I was pleased he was not alive to see his faith ruined.

But here she was. All chocolate and honey.

Aro had been right all along.

I sent up a silent apology to him, and could almost hear his chuckled
response. She was as defiant as ever, but so much more beautiful. Her
perusal of my body had spurred me on and made more than my inner
caveman stand to attention. My morning wood had never been as hard
as when I noticed she didn't have a bra on. Her nipples stood out,
showing her attraction to my nakedness. My fantasy was living and
breathing before my very eyes.

She thumped on the bathroom door aggressively.

"Are you planning on hiding in there all morning?" she shouted through
the wood panel.

"I'm not hiding. I'm getting cleaned up!" I growled back, but smiled into
the mirror when she muttered about cleaning up the house.

I felt a little guilty about the state of the place, but now that she was
here we could sort it out together, exactly as Aro planned. Newton
barked loudly from the porch to be let inside.

"Can you let Newton in, Bells?" I asked.

"Bells? Who the fuck are you to call me Bells? And who is Newton?"

My erection sprang to attention at the venom in her voice. I needed to
see the fire in her eyes, so flung the door open. Bella stood blazing,
hands on hips and eyes boring into mine. I smiled, and licked my lips at
the same time she noticed I was still naked.

"Would you put some clothes on?"

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"Why?" I questioned innocently.

"Because you...you're..," she gestured to my cock and continued to
open and close her mouth. Not a single coherent word came out. I
smirked at her embarrassment. She was simply adorable.

"What?" I retorted innocently.

"Who the hell are you?" she shouted.

I snorted before answering.

"Look, go and let my dog in, and I'll be down in five minutes to tell you,
but really, Bella, I'm disappointed."

"I'll go, but I'm only doing it so I don't have to look at your dick anymore.
I want you downstairs, and I want answers."

Bella spun around angrily and thundered down the stairs. I listened to
her open the door and croon sweetly to Newton. I longed for her to react
that way to me; for her to whisper in my ear as she played with my hair.
My cock ached at the thought, and usually I would have seen to the
problem and whacked off, but she was downstairs. Isabella Swan was
waiting for me, as I had done for her for the past twenty-three years.

She could wait another thirty minutes, I thought smugly and walked
back into the bathroom, not bothering to close the door behind me. If
she heard me, she would come to investigate and be greeted by
something more startling than just my nakedness. As much as I'd love
to see her reaction, I knew it was too soon and she would run.

So, I washed, brushed my teeth and wrapped a towel around my waist.
I was tempted again to taunt her and go downstairs naked. I mentally
chastised myself and bounced down the steps. She was stroking
Newton, but she hadn't sat down. Her ass stuck temptingly in the air as
she bent over my dog.

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Christ, what a fucking sight!

...and with that I was pitching a tent. I groaned at her tight little ass in
those skinny jeans and she spun around to face me.

"Jesus! You call a towel, clothing? Seriously?" She asked.

I could hear the complete exasperation in her voice, and decided I
needed to rein it in. She was finally where I was, and I couldn't stomach
her leaving because my boldness was too much for her.

I shrugged, as I replied, "You demanded I get down here. It was all I
had handy. Why aren't you sitting? There are two chairs and a perfectly
decent couch."

"Oh, really? You think they're perfectly decent do you? Well, Mr.
Whoever-the-hell-you-are, I have the evidence of what you do on the
furniture, and I'm not comfortable with being stuck to the couch by the
by-product of your porn addiction."

I howled loudly, and had to hold onto the edge of the towel to stop it
slipping. She was hilarious when she was angry. Just like when we
were kids, and I would pull her hair. She would scream for Aro, and I'd
get into terrible trouble. She'd stick her tongue out at me when his back
was turned.

"It's not an addiction, Bella. It's natural to enjoy the female form, and by
the way, I always wiped it up afterwards."

Her face scrunched up as she whispered, "Eww," and flounced onto the
nearest chair, perching on the very edge. I bit back a smile. She
gestured around the room.

"This place is a fucking mess. I feel like I'm going to catch something
just inhaling the air. What the hell have you done to my house?"

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"Our house," I corrected.

"I mean it's not like you don't have a trash can...what? What did you just
say?"

Her brows furrowed, completely perplexed by my words.

"This is our house. Aro wanted us both to have it and live in it together."

She looked at me like I had sprouted two heads, but continued to stroke
the dog. I was starting to hate that mutt. The way she ran her fingers
through his soft hair made me want to sit at her feet and beg for her to
do it to me.

"I don't even know who you are! And this house is mine, so after you've
cleaned it up, and you will, I want you gone! You're lucky I'm not
charging you rent," she shouted angrily.

"No, Bells, this is our house, and we will learn to live in it without yelling,
please."

"Oh my God! I'm calling the police. I've been patient with you, because
you seem to know me, but you're really testing my patience now. This
house was left to me by my Grandfather. It. Is. Mine. I have no clue who
you are, or what you're doing squatting here."

She stood and walked to pick up her backpack from the floor. I stopped
her by standing directly in front of it. She tried to side step me. I moved
with her. She tried the other way, but I moved again.

"ARGH! MOVE!"

I brought my lips to her ear, inhaling her sweet scent, as I whispered,
"Do you want to make sand pies, BB?"

"What?"

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She pulled back staring at me curiously, before I saw recognition dawn.

"Edward? No way! Really? Oh my God, it is. How did I not see it?
Nobody has hair that color."

"So you remember me now?" I asked smugly.

Her smile spread across her face, and she pressed her palm against my
chest. I covered it with my hand, wanting to keep it there forever. I'm
sure she felt my heart beat faster.

"I do! Damn, Edward, why are you here? I thought you were living in
France."

I could see she was genuinely startled that it was me, but was pleased
she at least remembered the little boy that played on the beach with
her. She had been seven years old the last time she had visited. Aro
had been so upset that summer. He and Bella's mother had argued
something terrible and Renee left, never to bring his granddaughter
back. Each summer I'd pray my friend would return. I would stand at the
gates to the house on the first day that school was out and wait, from
morning until dusk. She'd never arrive, of course, and Aro would always
tell me the time wasn't right. Sometimes I hated him for that.

"France?" I shook my head. "Bella, I've always been here. Yeah, I've
been away for a couple of weeks here and there with work, but I've lived
with Aro since I was twelve. That's why this is our house," I clarified.

"Oh, don't start that again," she moaned moving her hand and sitting
back in the chair. "I've signed the papers, Edward, and there was no
mention of you in them. I feel like a petulant child when I tell you it's
mine, but it is!"

"Aro said you'd be like this. He said you were too stubborn for you own
good, just like Renee."

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"Do you think insulting me is going to help your cause? You're in a
precarious position right now..."

"Tell me about it," I interrupted. "If you keep looking at me like that I'm
going to end up poking through this towel."

Bella rolled her eyes, and continued, ignoring my comment.

"I could still call the cops, and they would throw your scruffy ass out of
here," she stated a little more confidently.

"Then why haven't you?"

I raised my brows at her and stepped closer. Her head was aligned
perfectly with my cotton covered cock. She glared up at me, trying to
look nonchalant, but her cheeks were pink and her chest was rising and
falling faster than before. I could see down her t-shirt. Down her
stunning cleavage, and continued to get my fill before she slapped my
thigh.

"Stop ogling me! I would say you need to get laid, but by the looks of
your stash, you do that with yourself a lot anyway." She paused, sighing
loudly. "Can you give me a moment to digest all this?"

"Sure," I shrugged and sat down on the couch. I shoved some
newspapers and magazines onto the floor, and got another disgusted
look from Bella. "Can I ask you something? Well two things actually."

I studied her peeling the polish from her nails, as I lit a cigarette. I took a
long drag and exhaled slowly. She looked upset. Had I fucked up
already? I'd been so excited to see her, to have her here. I'd gotten
carried away with myself. She looked up and nodded slowly.

"Where's your husband. Will I have to entertain him too, because Aro
never stated three of us were to share this place."

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"You won't have to entertain shit, because IT'S NOT YOUR HOUSE!"
Her voice escalated the more she spoke, and I cringed. Shit, she was
an aggressive one.

I held up my hands in surrender and she shrunk back down, her whole
face red with anger.

"OK, sorry, but where is he?"

"How do you know I'm married?" she shot back.

"I'm asking the questions, but I'll answer that one. Aro kept track of your
career, and also your dad would send him updates and pictures. He felt
sorry for him, but after Charlie died he only had your articles to rely on."

"Charlie? Wow, news to me."

"You going to answer me now?"

"I'm divorced," she groaned. "...and no, I don't want to talk about it.
Certainly not with you."

My heart did a little happy dance, she really was mine. It wasn't the only
thing doing the happy dance, so I brought a cushion across my lap to
hide my excitement.

"Fine. I want to ask, but I'll leave it for now. The other question was why
you thought I was in France."

"Why the hell do you get to ask the questions? I should be asking them
all. Every, Fucking. One. And I should make you answer them too, even
if I have to torture them from you."

"Please," I stated, gaining another cute little eye roll from Bella.

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"How come you've been living with Granddad so long? Where's your
Mom?"

She finally settled back into the chair, and I took it as a good sign. She
wasn't ready to throw me out just yet. I took a drag on the cig before
speaking. She watched me, as my lips formed a seal over the end and
she crossed her legs tightly.

Interesting.

"Mom married again. Nice guy, actually. She got pregnant and Carlisle,
that's the guy, got a job in Seattle. I refused to move with them, they
forced me, but I ran away and returned here three times. In the end they
had a huge discussion with Aro, and I got to stay here. I've been living
with him, helping him ever since."

She just nodded, taking everything in. This was more than I could ever
have dreamed. Just sitting here with her, talking, was making hope
blossom again. She had been the only real friend I'd had. For two
summers we played in the sand, and laughed in the sea. She had hated
it when I threw worms at her hair, but had giggled when I handed her
daisies. I compared every woman I ever met with her in one way or
another. Only Aro had understood my infatuation with her.

To him we were destined to be.

Edward and Bella.

I just had to convince her of that fact. Right now, she didn't look very
impressed with what I was offering, and I wasn't referring to my cock. It
went without saying that she would be impressed with that.

"Fine, but that doesn't negate the fact that you're in my house, treating it
like a garbage dump, and paying me no rent."

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"I could clean it up, but I'm not paying rent on my own house..." I held a
finger up to stop her snapping at me, and continued. "...Aro knew he
couldn't put me in his Will. Your mother would have contested it all the
way, so he left you a letter and a pretty decent explanation of what he
planned. It's waiting for you when you want it, but I warn you, you have
to be ready for its contents."

Bella groaned and ran her hand through her auburn curls.

"Look, I've been driving for hours. I'm tired and need some food and a
coffee. Can I shelve this for a couple of hours?"

"Yeah, we could do that," I confirmed, still excited she hadn't booted me
out.

"No, no, no, dear Eddie. Not we. I'm going to calm down before I hurt
you for defiling my beautiful house. You are going to clean said beautiful
house."

She was smiling slyly and her eyes glistened in mirth. Christ, she was
perfect for me.

"Couldn't we get to know each other again, over breakfast? I'd make it."

"No. You are going to tidy up your disgusting filth, while I consider
exactly what the hell to do right now."

I nodded, not wanting to push her further and started to walk upstairs.

"Where are you going? Don't you think it's more pertinent you deal with
the shit down here?" she moaned.

"Well, I was going to get some clothes on," I stated seductively. "But if
you prefer me naked, I can do that too."

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I let the towel fall to the floor exposing my ass. I was gifted with an
audible intake of breath. My naked form definitely got to her.

"For God's sake, Edward!" she bellowed. "I'm getting my things from the
car. Put some clothes on, and get your ass down here to clean,
otherwise I will be calling the cops."

I watched her flounce out of the house, taking my dog with her. I
grinned wildly.

Today was the best day ever.

I hope that lived up to your expectations. He's bold, but so damn
sappy for her!

I got 181 reviews for the first chapter. Can I beat that for this one if
I offer you a teaser?

Pressing that button will keep Edward naked...go on...

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2. Chapter 2: Waiting

3. Chapter 3: Sandcastles

*stunned silence from Lambie*

Thank you, is all I can say.

hunterhunting holds my hand through all of this. Thanks bb.

Maylin & Twirlgrrl make my words look pretty and are the best beta
team ever. *insert applause*

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward is mine...all mine!

BPOV

I'd made him clean the house of all the discarded newspapers,
magazines and fast food cartons. He'd also been ordered to remove all
the ashtrays and wash them thoroughly. Edward argued with me, of
course, saying they were only going to get ash in them again. However,
he did as I asked. After three hours, I brought my belongings in from the
truck, and we were able to sit back down. I didn't know what to say to
him. I was still in shock.

He was Edward.

My Edward.

I thought I'd never see him again, and if I was honest, had thought of
him less and less over the years. I still had the daisies he gave me.
They were pressed in my favorite book. I also had the card he'd made
for my birthday. I would get them out when I was feeling melancholy
and remember those two summers we had as innocent children. I'd had
the biggest crush on him. He was four years older than me, but always
seemed so much more mature. I'd idolized him, following him
everywhere. Granddad had laughed, but always encouraged it. He

3. Chapter 3: Sandcastles

would tell us just how good we were for each other, and we should look
out for one another. Aro called us 'the couple' and would tease us
mercilessly about getting married when we were older.

We'd met on the beach. I was building sandcastles, and Edward had
been playing soccer with some local boys. The ball Edward kicked had
landed right in the center of the prettiest princess castle ever. I'd made
a moat and a little turret, and was very proud of it. The ball had
destroyed all of it. I'd bit my lip to stop from crying, as he came over with
a sheepish look on his face. He apologized and picked up his ball. I'd
stunned us both by bursting into tears. Edward had been so sweet,
because he knelt down and tried to rebuild it, pushing at the sand in
vain. The boys had yelled at him, but he kicked the ball back to them,
telling them he was no longer interested in playing. He nervously
rubbed my back to stop my tears.

I think Edward Masen stole my heart that day.

Each summer I would pray Mom and Granddad would rebuild their
relationship. I wanted to see him again, but as the years went by it grew
nonexistent. I think I was eleven, when I'd heard Mom whispering to her
friend one day, about the odd little child moving to France, and finally
leaving Aro alone. That was the time I stopped hoping to see him again.
I kept his gifts and would think of him once in a while, but I gave up all
hope of seeing my childhood friend again.

I was certainly seeing him now. All of him. My only reaction was 'Wow',
because damn, my scrawny little friend was beautiful. He was clearly
comfortable with his body, and I couldn't help mentally berating myself
when I told him to get dressed. However, we needed to talk. We'd
grown up and changed so much. Edward was under the illusion that we
were going to share this house, like he'd done with Aro. That couldn't be
further from the truth. This house was supposed to be my haven. The
place where I'd rediscover myself, and find out who I truly was. Edward
would have to find somewhere else to stay. There was only one
bedroom, anyway.

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I blushed, because as soon as I thought of the bedroom all I could
remember was his naked body lying in the bed, all rumpled from sleep. I
shook my head and hoped he hadn't noticed my embarrassment. There
was no way I was going to tell him why I was blushing. I continued to
watch him, as he sucked on the end of a cigarette. It was something I
had always considered disgusting, but I longed to be the one connected
to his lips. I was jealous of a damn cigarette. Clearly seeing his dick first
thing in the morning had killed a few brain cells, and only the horny
ones remained.

"You can't stay here," I stated adamantly.

He smirked, a crooked little smile that would make most women drop
their panties. I had to cross my arms over my chest to stop my erect
nipples from showing. I was not going to encourage his crudeness.

"I don't need your permission, BB."

"Don't call me that. I've never been that," I interrupted childishly.

"You always were to me, so don't deny it."

He turned on the couch and reclined backwards on it, crossing his legs
at his ankles. He looked so comfortable, not fazed by my appearance at
all. I combed my fingers absently through my hair. I really wanted a
shower, but it would be in cold water, and I had yet to resolve anything
with Edward.

"We need to sort this out. I keep telling you it's my house, but you're
under the misguided impression that because Granddad said you could
live here, that you're OK to still do that. You can't Edward. I came here
to be alone, and I really would like to catch up and get to know you
again, but you have to stay somewhere else."

"No, I don't," he replied cockily, and stubbed the cigarette out in the
clean ashtray. "I explained why Aro didn't place his wishes in his Will. I

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have a letter and some other things of interest for you to see, when you
are ready. Aro had me promise to give them to you when you returned."

"How did you know I would come back? I could have just sold this place
and never visited it ever again."

"True, but you know Aro. He had complete conviction that you would
return. This is where we're meant to be."

I huffed in exasperation. I really didn't know what to say to him. I knew
so little about my Granddad, and my mother wouldn't answer any of my
questions. This was not what I'd expected when I signed the papers and
got my house. It had certainly never mentioned a squatter.

"Can I see the letter?"

He nodded and moved off the couch to the bookshelf. There was a
shoebox resting on the top, and Edward reach up to retrieve it. His grey
t-shirt lifted to reveal a slither of toned stomach to me. I licked my lips,
as I continued to ogle him. It was only when he coughed loudly that I
realized I'd been caught. Shame made my cheeks flush, and Edward
grin.

"You still do that?" he asked, handing me an envelope.

I ignored him and focused on the fancy script on the front. It simply said
'Bella', but it still made me want to cry. What had Granddad thought he
was doing offering this house to me?

"I'll go and make us a drink while you read that." Edward muttered and
disappeared into the kitchen.

I opened the yellowing envelope with trepidation and unfolded the letter.

Dearest Darling Bella,

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Oh, how I have missed you. I'm sorry we never got to meet again, but I
want you to know I have never forgotten you. I thought of you every
day, and remember your times at the house fondly. That is why I want
you to have it. I want you to be happy here, and make some beautiful
memories. I know it needs some work, but I'm sure you would like to
make it feel like your own anyway.

I have a few things to request though, my Isabella.

First is Edward. I know you have met him again, because you are
reading this. He's not as certain of himself as he appears, especially
when it comes to you and matters of the heart. The poor boy needs to
be taken care of, because he simply cannot look after himself.

I snorted at that line. The state of this house when I arrived illustrated
that.

I wanted to leave the house to both of you, but knew the trouble that
would cause. So I'm asking you to be kind and allow him to stay. It is
merely a request my Isabella, but one I would like you to think carefully
about. You were the best of friends once, you could be again, and it
would do Edward the world of good to have someone. When I fell ill all I
could think about was his care, and the fact that he only had me. His
parents speak to him when they can, but only I really know what an
amazing young man he is. He could make you very happy.

Second, is the house in general. If you cannot see your way to sorting
things out with Edward, and feel the need to leave, please give Edward
first refusal. He sees it as his home, and selling it from under his feet
would hurt both him, and me. Money isn't an issue for him. He has a
very good career and can easily buy the house from you.

Lastly, my darling, I want you to be so very happy. I know your marriage
was not what you expected, but from the ruins of that, could come
something beautiful. Remember the tide may come and wash away
your sandcastle, but the sand still remains, allowing you to build

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something new.

I love you my Isabella. I'm sorry I wasn't able to tell you one last time.

Granddad

Xxx

A tear trickled down my cheek, and I clutched the letter to my chest. He
had missed me, just like Edward had said. I wished I could have seen
him again too, but at least I had my inheritance to remember him by.
However, there was still the question of Edward. I couldn't feasibly
share a house with someone I didn't know, and there was only one
bedroom.

Aro had stated Edward had money, so there wouldn't be a problem with
him staying elsewhere. That thought made me feel guilty, because Aro
wanted him here. I stared out the window across the overgrown garden.
What was I supposed to do? We had been children, and hadn't talked in
over twenty years. We were perfect strangers. Why did Aro think this
was a good idea?

I heard Edward enter the room and turned to face him. He was holding
two chipped mugs that were steaming, so I assumed it was coffee. He
raised his brows at me, questioning silently.

"That barn on the other side of the land," I said, pointing through the
glass. "Is it used at all?"

"I use it as an office. It's hooked up once you get the power turned back
on. It has a bathroom and a small bed. Aro was thinking of having it
renovated, so it was a separate, self contained dwelling. Why?"

"It's yours," I stated bluntly, hoping it was the answer to my problems.

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He blinked a few times, shocked by my declaration, before handing me
the mug and sitting down.

"I don't understand. Didn't you read the letter? I'm pretty sure Aro
explained things in there."

I stayed standing and looked down at him.

"Oh, he explained, but Edward, we are strangers. You can't seriously
expect me to share my house with you indefinitely. So, I'm letting you
have the barn. You can remodel it, whatever you like. It's yours."

He raised one brow devilishly, and asked, "Where do you suggest I stay
until it's done?"

"Erm...well...I..," I stuttered, not actually saying anything.

Fuck, what was I suggesting he did? I shouldn't feel responsible for him.
He was a grown man, but Granddad had asked that I be kind to him,
and as stupid as it seemed, I kept replaying the day on the beach in my
head. Edward had been older, and the other boys teased him for
staying with me to rebuild the princess sandcastle. He'd brushed their
comments away, though, and had continued to make the turret. He'd
shown me kindness, even though it was uncomfortable for him.

He had also helped Granddad, even when his own daughter wouldn't. I
simply wasn't heartless enough to kick him out, but how could we go
about this? The logistics would need to be worked out. He would have
to sleep on the couch, because there was no way I was giving up my
bed for him.

A bed that smelled of Edward.

I rolled my eyes and groaned. I hadn't meant to verbalize it, but it
slipped out, showing my turmoil.

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"Problem?" he asked slyly.

He knew exactly what I was pondering, and he seemed to be getting a
kick out of it.

"OK, you can stay, but only while they renovate the barn, and then
you're gone. I'll see a lawyer and make it legally yours. You stay on the
couch though, and you pick up after yourself. I'm not your fucking maid."

His eyes were serious and focused intensely on me, as he came
forward. My body responded to his proximity, heightening each and
every one of my senses. I could smell him, see him, hear him. I just
couldn't touch him. Edward had no such qualms. He reached out and
stroked a single finger along my jaw, from earlobe to chin. It left a trail of
fire in its wake. I opened my mouth. I intended to chew him out further,
but he placed his finger against my lips, stopping not only my speech,
but any conscious thought right along with it. My lips tingled, and I bit
back the urge to suck the elegant digit into my mouth.

What the fuck is going on?

The remnants of my childhood crush obviously still lingered.

"Thank you, Bella. Aro would be very proud of you right now," he
whispered.

His breath floated across my face, causing my heartbeat to kick up a
notch and my eyes fluttered closed. I was chastising myself for acting
like a love sick teenage girl, at the same time my body took on a will of
its own. It wanted Edward, and was willing him to place those lips on
mine instead of his finger. Every part of me was hyperaware of his
closeness.

Newton barked snapping us both sharply from the moment. Edward
cleared his throat and removed his finger. I felt an immediate loss, and
licked my lips slowly.

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"I need to take him for a walk."

I nodded, unsure whether my voice would actually work and allowing
my pulse to slow down a little. He flitted around the room, collecting his
keys and wallet, before whistling loudly for Newton. I winced as the
sound almost perforated my ear drums. He shot me an apologetic look
before opening the front door.

"Erm," he said, pausing, as the dog ran out at lightning speed. "Do you
want to come with us? We just go along the beach and back here,
through the forest."

"I...well...erm."

Spit it out, Bella!

"We could talk. You know, get to know each other again?"

He sounded hopeful. Edward wanted me to come, and wasn't just
asking to be polite. I nodded and tugged my hoodie on.

We walked slowly across the garden, as Newton raced around us
panting and barking.

"He gets a little excited when I whistle," he stated awkwardly.

What the hell were we supposed to do now?

"We become friends again. You remember how to do that, don't you,
BB?"

I looked questioningly at him, confused that he seemed to have read my
mind. There was no way our connection was that strong.

"You asked what we're supposed to do now," he chuckled.

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I slapped my hand over my mouth.

"Shit," I mumbled. "Did I say that out loud?"

"Yes, Bella, you did. Can you stop over thinking this, and just go with
it?" he asked, as he placed his hand in the small of my back.

We slipped through the fence and onto the wet sand. I could just make
out Newton racing happily along the beach.

"I've never really 'gone with' anything before. I'm a planner, Edward.
You should see my lists. I actually write lists of lists. I need routine and
structure."

He frowned at me and unzipped his jacket.

"Really? Then why did you come here? I think you were dying to leave
the rigid lifestyle you had. Not many people would have packed up, and
come to live somewhere they last visited twenty-three years ago. You
didn't even come to look at the place first. You were desperate for
something different. Admit it."

"I just needed a new start. I was so confused after all the Tyler stuff..."

He coughed, and I'm sure I heard him mutter 'asshole', but I continued,
ignoring it.

"Staying in Seattle wasn't really an option. I'd have to see him every
day, and live in the house where he did that. I..."

"Did what?" he asked sharply. I was taken aback by the slight snarl that
played on his lips.

"Erm, Tyler had an affair."

"I knew he was a fucking moron! Just looking at him told me that!"

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"You've seen him? I don't understand, Edward. How?" I questioned.

I stood still waiting for his answer. Edward stopped and turned to face
me. The wind was blowing his bronze hair across his forehead and into
his eyes. When I looked at him here, like this, time hadn't changed us.
We were still two people searching for friendship.

"Aro had a wedding photo of you two. Charlie sent it to him."

He took my hand in his and studied my knuckles. His touch sent little
sparks shooting up my arm. My reaction to him seemed to get more
intense the closer he was to me. It scared the hell out of me, because I
had nothing to compare it to. With Tyler we had been comfortable
companions, much like roommates. This was new, strange, yet
exhilarating. Maybe he was right, maybe I had come here for something
other than what I'd fooled myself into thinking.

"Bella, no man should ever cheat on someone they love. Someone they
adore. He didn't deserve you," he whispered so quietly most of his
words were taken by the wind. I understood what he was saying though.

"Thank you. I might actually get used to having a friend looking out for
me," I smiled and pulled my hand from his grasp, before calling to
Newton and walking on ahead.

I missed his last words, because I was too far ahead. All I caught was
'friends'.

It was a start, and one I was happy trying.

Another short one, but from now on the chapters will be weekly
and longer.

Teasers are still up for grabs if you review, though with the amount
coming in I have no idea whether I can keep it up.

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3. Chapter 3: Sandcastles

We'll see... so get them while they're hot... and they are!

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4. Chapter 4: Swings

A million thank you's to everyone reading, reviewing and loving!

Tides was recci'd by The Fictionators on their blog today - Hugs to
you ladies. ILY all.

My beta's are amazing. Maylin & Twirlgrrl - thanks for making my
words sparkle.

hunterhunting & Redvelvetheaven - I heart both you ladies more
than I should :D

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward owns me.

BPOV

I'd been in bed a little over three hours and I'd tossed and turned the
whole time. The sheets were now twisted around my ankles. I simply
couldn't sleep. He was downstairs, on the couch. It had been like this
for the last two nights. I was so tired during the day, because all I could
think about at night was him. I'd fallen asleep while writing at the dinner
table yesterday. It was surreal that I was even letting him stay. I fooled
myself into saying it was for Granddad, but if I was totally honest, it was
for me too. I wasn't sure I wanted to be alone, and he wasn't really a
complete stranger.

He was Edward. The boy I'd had a crush on.

However, things were a little different now. Edward was different. Damn,
he was hot! He wasn't modest either. The man seemed very
comfortable being naked. I'd gotten more than an eyeful. I'd seen it all,
and I couldn't forget it. The image of Edward lying on this very bed
sleeping and aroused played over and over in my head. I was sweating,
and it wasn't even warm in the house. I was tense, and in desperate

4. Chapter 4: Swings

need of some release.

Pulling the pillow across my face, I screamed into it. This was ridiculous.
I needed to switch myself off and get some rest. Tomorrow would be a
long day, because the contractor was coming to start the renovations.
The problem was that every time I closed my eyes I saw Edward. I tried
to ignore the image of his toned torso, and replaced it with the one of
him as a child. That didn't help, because it would invariably morph back
into the Edward of now; all sinew and sex.

Did I really just think of Edward and sex together?

This was too confusing. I'd been back here less than a week and was
now as mixed up as I'd been in Seattle. I'd not only inherited a house,
but a squatter right along with it. A squatter I was intensely attracted to.
I shouldn't feel that way about Edward, but it was there, swirling in my
abdomen.

The walk on the beach with Newton had been nice. Edward and I had
chatted about my job and the move from Seattle. We'd also talked
about Aro over the last couple of days. He seemed to miss him a lot. He
would get a faraway look in his eyes when I mentioned his name. I was
stunned that Aro had taken him in and looked after a teenage boy, for
no reason other than the boy wanted to stay in La Push. Edward had a
loving mother and step father, but preferred life here at the beach.

He hadn't really told me much about his life. In fact, I really only knew
the basics, but he did tell me about his little sister, and how he wished
he could see her more often. She wasn't so little now, though. Charlotte,
or Charlie, as Edward preferred to call her, had been born when he was
twelve, so she was a twenty year old adult now. He promised to show
me a photo, but he never did. That first night we'd eaten some
sandwiches, and I unpacked a few of my belongings. The atmosphere
had been odd. Charged? Each time we were close I swear I heard the
air around us crackle.

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It had been that way ever since. I tried to stay out of his way, but it was
difficult, and Aro would be upset if I ignored him.

I gave up trying to sleep, and rolled from the bed. I would take a cold
bath, and try again after that. I padded from the bedroom, into the
darkness of the bathroom. I would have to bathe in the moonlight; it was
horrid living without electricity. I couldn't wait until it was switched on
tomorrow.

It was only when I came to lock the door, that I noticed the distinct lack
of one. Different options flitted through my head, but I surmised that
Edward was asleep and wouldn't disturb me.

I was wrong, because only seconds after I had stripped, Edward strolled
in. I yelped and tried to cover my nudity. He reached the towel before I
did though. He held it between his fingers, teasing me with it. I was
mortified. He was smiling smugly and in the darkness it came across as
almost evil.

"Edward!" I shouted. "I'm taking a bath. Get out!"

"I need to pee," he shrugged.

"I really don't care! I'm in here!"

He laughed at me, as I lunged for the towel, but he snapped it away
chuckling.

"Edward, give it to me, then I can go outside and wait," I pleaded.

He dangled it in front of me, before snatching it back again. I couldn't
even try to get my discarded clothes. They were on the floor near his
feet, and that would mean bending over in front of him. I was having a
hard time keeping myself covered, and didn't miss the glint in his eyes
when I removed my arm from my breasts to try and grab the towel,
again.

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4. Chapter 4: Swings

"Come and get it, BB," he whispered.

"I'm not playing games."

"I'm not playing either. I'm serious, if you want it come over here and get
it. If not, leave the room, so I can piss."

"Ergh! You're so crude. You were never like that before," I protested.

"Ha! Peeing is not crude, it's natural. And I was eleven when you knew
me, so you're right. I was different. Now do you want this or not?"

With my heart beating too fast I walked over to him. Standing in front of
him stark naked was turning me to jelly. I fooled myself into thinking it
was nerves, but nerves didn't make your breasts ache and your sex
throb. What was it about him that was driving me crazy with need?

He moved the towel to behind his back and smirked at me. I would have
to come closer to retrieve it. Taking a deep breath I stepped closer to
him and moved my arms tentatively around his waist. What was I
doing? If I was quick enough I could take it from him and cover myself
before he saw much more. However, as soon as my fingers touched the
material, his arms locked around me, bringing our bodies together. I
gasped in shock, as our skin connected; hard chest to soft breasts. I
looked up at him, trying to understand what he was doing. He grinned
down at me, his eyes shining playfully in the moonlight.

My fingers were itching to skim up his back, and dance across the
muscles. We were staring at each other for what seemed like hours, but
in reality it was milliseconds. I could feel his erection pressing against
my stomach, and I had to rein in the urge to rub against it.

As if reading my mind, Edward snorted and let go of me, along with the
towel. I pulled it to cover my modesty and took a step backwards. He
was smirking at my stunned expression, as he left the bathroom. I was
somewhat disappointed that he wasn't naked again. He was wearing

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tight black boxer shorts. They covered his ass, but molded his cheeks
perfectly.

I stood in the dark, clutching the towel to my chest, completely lost for
words. What the hell had just happened? He hadn't even used the toilet,
so did he just come in here to annoy me? To get his kicks and see me
without clothes on? A thrill shot through my body at the idea of him
waiting downstairs, listening for movement up here.

Waiting for me.

Just the thought of him needing to see me made my skin tingle. It would
be wonderful to share that kind of intensity with someone. A desperation
to feel them. A consuming need to be with them. With Tyler it had
always felt like a function rather than a pleasure. I obviously knew now
that it was a function to him, something he felt he should offer his wife
as part of a marriage. On reflection that made me feel used and dirty.
When he was having sex with me, was he thinking about another man?

I shuddered. I didn't want to revisit that image right now. I needed to go
and see what the hell Edward thought he was playing at. I threw my
tank and shorts back on, and stormed down the stairs into the living
room. The comforter lay in a pile on the floor beside the couch, but no
Edward. I scanned the room, and was about to try the kitchen, when I
noticed a strange blue glow coming from the porch. The front door was
open, but the screen closed. Not that it was any use with the huge hole
in the top section.

I squinted, trying to decipher what the hell it was, but couldn't make
anything out. I tiptoed cautiously and pushed the screen door open, with
shaking hands. The wind whipped across the wooden porch, making
me shiver. I should've put my robe on. I forgot just how cold it became
here at night with the sea breeze.

"You going to come out, or just stand there and spy on me?"

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I darted my gaze, and found him sitting on the old wooden bench in the
corner. He had his laptop on the table and was studying me. He was
definitely warm, because he had a huge blanket wrapped around his
shoulders.

"How the hell are you using that? We have no power."

He shook his head and sighed in exasperation.

"Batteries woman! I have a bunch of them, but I always charge it at the
internet cafe in town, anyway. I just have to use it in short intervals. I
can't wait until you get the power back up."

I walked a little closer, wrapping my arms around myself to keep warm.

"Why are you out here?"

"Atmosphere. I'm writing a particularly gritty part and needed some
inspiration."

I frowned at him, and came to rest at the other end of the bench. There
was plenty of space between us, but I could feel the heat rolling of him.
He never took his eyes from mine, following me every step I took. It was
a little intimidating, because they looked almost black in this minimal
light.

"Gritty part? What are you writing? Is it work?" I laughed. "You're
sharing my house, and I have no clue what you do, yet you seem to
know everything about me."

He turned the laptop, so I could see it clearly.

"I'm a novelist. I write crime books, so that's why I needed the dark
atmosphere. I come out here a lot at night. It's very eerie."

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His voice rumbled through the space between us, and caressed my cold
skin. I shivered, but it wasn't only the temperature. His voice had such a
beautiful cadence; deep yet seductive, and here in the dark it sounded
so much huskier.

Edward lifted his arm, beckoning for me to get under the blanket with
him. I hesitated, and received an eye roll from him.

"I won't bite! I prefer to lick," he whispered, clicking the 'k'.

My pussy purred 'hell yes!', as I mentally chastised myself for letting him
get to me. He was doing it on purpose.

"Oh, come on. I was joking," he chuckled, and pulled me closer.

I was immediately enveloped in his scent. I almost moaned out loud. It
was musky, with a touch of citrus. I closed my eyes, enjoying the heat,
when he brought his lips to my ear and uttered, "Well, unless you want
me to lick. Then I'd willingly oblige."

I glared at him in annoyance, but was feeling entirely the opposite. Was
it right for me to feel this way around someone I had known for less than
a week? It was so oddly exhilarating to be spoken to like that. It wasn't
something I was used to, and would have thought vulgar in the past. Yet
here I was, wanting him to say something similar again. I sighed, and
Edward took that as a sign of annoyance, because he apologized
quietly. I didn't want to admit I liked it, so let it go.

"So how many books have you written? Will I know them? Are they
popular?"

"Whoa, with all the questions." He stated smiling. "I've done four, and
I'm writing my fifth. I make a pretty good living from it."

"So good you have to squat in someone else's house, rent free?"

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He pinched my shoulder playfully, making me cry out in pain.

"Baby," he stated.

"Oh yeah, I'm such a baby. At least I don't cry and run away, when I see
a fish flopping around on the sand."

His eyes went wide, and his jaw hung open. He was clearly shocked I'd
remembered that little titbit.

To tease him further I opened and closed my mouth, like a fish gasping
for air.

"You remember that? Wow. It was only one time, you know. It freaked
me out."

He shrugged and went back to his laptop, as if he was hurt by my
banter, but I could see the small smirk playing on the corner of his lips.
Now that I was here with him, I was recalling so many little things about
our times on the beach, or in the forest. The whole incident with the fish
had been hilarious, for a boy he could really shriek.

I was trying not to focus on the way his bicep grazed my shoulder when
he moved his fingers across the keys. It was a waste of time, because
each time his skin skimmed mine a spark raced down my arm. I shifted
my position, so there was more distance between us. He looked up at
me, and raised his brows questioningly.

"I didn't want to be in your way," I reasoned. "Anyway, I didn't come
down here to sit in the dark and look at your stuff..."

"Oh, if only you had," he interrupted, his voice dripping with innuendo.

"Jesus, Edward, I'm being serious. You can't go doing shit like that," I
demanded.

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"Like what? Show you my laptop? It was only my writing. It wasn't like I
was watching porn."

I threw the blanket off my shoulders and stood. He was pissing me off
with his mockery. Did he ever take anything seriously?

"You know I meant the bathroom incident," I snarled. "I'm letting you
stay here out of respect for my Granddad. You need to realize this is not
your house, and you can't do things like that!"

"I needed to pee," he shrugged.

"No you didn't. You're just using it as an excuse to ogle me, aren't you?"

He stood abruptly and pushed the bench back with his calves. The
blanket cascaded down to the floor, as he shook it from his shoulders.

"You certainly think highly of yourself, don't you Mrs. Crowley?"

"Swan," I corrected.

"Oh, well, Ms. Swan, my statement still stands. What makes you think I
have nothing better to do than to wait up half the night listening to see if
you wake up? I. Needed. To. Pee."

"Then why haven't you been? I've been down here and out of the
bathroom for at least half an hour."

We were almost toe to toe, and I had to crane my neck to see him
clearly. My heart was pounding in my chest at his proximity to me. I
could see his chest rising and falling faster than normal. I was affecting
him, and I took a small amount of pleasure from it.

"Do you want me to give you an explanation of what happens when a
man gets wood?"

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"What?" I asked, completely perplexed by his shift in topic.

I frowned and shook my head, wondering what the hell he was on
about.

"Look, I needed to go, so came upstairs and you were there naked,
Bella! Christ, have you seen yourself? I'm not ashamed to admit I got
hard. At that point there was no way I was taking a leak, OK? You get
me now?"

I felt heat start to color my cheeks, and was thankful it was dark. He had
already noticed I still blushed when embarrassed, so having him see it
again would have made it worse. I mumbled an apology and turned to
go back inside. Edward grasped my wrist in his hand, before I could
take another step.

I looked down at his long fingers wrapped around my slender wrist. I'd
made a fool of myself and couldn't bring myself to meet his gaze.

"Bella, look at me."

When I didn't move he placed his index finger under my chin and turned
my face to greet his. His expression was serious, and his eyes fixed
darkly on mine. It was so quiet, that all I could hear were the waves as
they lapped across the sand, and the rustle of wind in the trees.

"I can ogle you, if you'd like. It wouldn't be a hardship, especially with
you wearing those tiny shorts and tight top," he whispered seriously, but
then pissed me off entirely by laughing loudly.

I wrenched my arm from his hold and staggered backwards.

"I'm not joking around with you!" I yelled, turning tail and running
upstairs.

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He gave a muffled retort, that I didn't hear. Once in the bedroom I
slammed the door shut and flopped onto the bed. I screamed into the
pillow, as I landed face first. He had me so wound up, and it was only
getting worse the longer I spent time with him. Why the hell had I
agreed to this? He was obnoxious, and thoroughly annoying, but I
couldn't stop from smiling.

He was so cocksure of himself. So comfortable in his skin, that I
couldn't stop the arousal vibrating through my system. What would it be
like to be with a man like that? Tyler was always so secretive. Most of
the time he got undressed for bed in the bathroom, and I'd never dared
to walk in on him while he took a shower. When we made love it was
always in the dark, but I now knew why.

Cool it, Bella.

Thinking about Tyler didn't help. I rolled on my side and tried to ignore
the stickiness between my thighs. Edward was affecting me in the same
way I had done to him. I drifted off to sleep wondering how long it would
be before I could move him into the barn.

I'd had a total of three hours sleep. I was irritable because I was so
tired, and the contractors would be here today. I'd come outside for
some space. The house was feeling rather claustrophobic. It wasn't that
it was small. It was the half naked man that continued to prowl around in
there. He had no qualms about being half dressed. Edward seemed to
wear little more than his underwear unless he was walking Newton.

I would get the contractors to start the barn first. I needed him out. My
body couldn't stand the constant state of arousal. It wasn't only his
body, but his voice made my abdomen pulse in desire.

I took a deep breath and looked out across my land. From my position I
could see everything I owned. I was on the edge of the forest, on a
battered tree swing Aro had fixed up. It had been my first summer here.
I hadn't met Edward then, and I was bored. He'd spent the morning

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banging in the barn, and had hooked it to the tree before the day was
out. I'd loved it, and couldn't believe it was still here. I wasn't much of a
carpenter, but maybe I'd fix the swing myself, in honor of my granddad.

I pushed my feet against the dirt and swung a little. Newton was racing
across the garden barking loudly. I groaned a little, because wherever
the dog was, Edward followed and vice versa. Sure enough, Edward
appeared from the house in running shorts and a wife beater. He sat on
the steps and tied his sneakers, before looking around for the dog. His
gaze fixed on mine almost immediately. It was as though he sensed my
presence here, and was drawn to me.

I tried to be as nonchalant as possible, and continued to swing. It was
difficult because the nearer he came to me, the more my heart raced
and my skin tingled. His eyes sparkled from the huge grin he had
plastered across his face, as he approached me.

"So you found it then?" He asked gesturing to the swing.

"Yeah, I didn't think it would still be here. I was just walking. I needed
some air."

"Aro wouldn't let anyone touch it. He said it was waiting for you," he
snorted and continued quietly. "It wasn't the only one."

My heart swelled with love for my Granddad. The things he had done
for me, when he never really knew if I'd be back or not. He held
complete faith in me. I wish I had the same amount of faith in myself. I
was continually questioning the decisions I made, especially the one to
come here and start again.

"Are you going running on the beach?"

He came closer and held the ropes either side of my head, effectively
stopping the swing and caging me in. I gulped.

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"I usually go through the forest. Newton prefers the woods to the sand."

His face was aligned with mine, and he was so close, I could feel his
breath leaving his lips in little wisps. I had to stop my eyelids from
fluttering closed and reveling in the sensation. The air was still around
us as we stared at each other. I could see little gold flecks in his
emerald eyes. They were such a startling shade, so intense, yet
welcoming. I couldn't think of a single thing to say, everything seemed
to be centered on Edward and his proximity. I wanted to avert my eyes,
but I was locked to him, unable to do anything but stare.

He moved his head slowly closer to mine. My whole body resonated
with want. I could feel my pulse throb on my neck, and I was breathing
faster the closer he got. I swallowed when the corner of his mouth lifted.
Little lines appeared at the side of his lips, and I had to bite the inside of
my mouth to stop myself from licking them.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

I almost stopped breathing when he pulled the swing towards him. My
knees where touching his thighs, and we were almost nose to nose.

"Bella," he whispered.

"Yes?" I replied, not sure if it was really a question, or permission to kiss
me.

Oh, how I wanted him to kiss me. Please.

"Bella," he repeated.

My brain was screaming for me to answer him, but my body was
shouting just as loudly to forget words, and show him what I wanted to
say. I counted down, mentally preparing myself...

3...

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2...

1...

"I'll be back in a while, unless you want to come with us?" Edward
stated, not moving from his position.

What?

"Umm..."

I was completely bewildered by his change of tack. I was sure he
wanted the same as me. I could feel the power building between us.
Clearly I had been wrong. With that thought, I felt a blush begin the
crawl across my chest and up my neck.

He chuckled.

"I love that," he uttered, and kissed my nose quickly.

He let go of the swing and jogged off, shaking his head. Newton raced
after him as soon as he whistled. He didn't look back, and I was left
stunned on the swing. He had kissed me, but it was affectionately.

On the nose.

My lips were right in front of his, but he'd chosen to kiss my nose. I
groaned and buried my face in my hands. I was a moron, and had gone
too long without sex. I'd got the signals he was giving me so mixed up.

The roar of an engine startled me from my pity party, and I looked
across the garden. A brawny guy climbed from his truck and stood
assessing the house. I figured by his tool belt he must be the contractor.
I hopped off the swing and wiped the dust from my ass, as I walked
over to greet him.

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"Ms. Swan?" he boomed.

His size was extremely intimidating, but the little dimples on either side
of his smile eased my anxiety. I nodded and took his outstretched hand
to shake. His hand swamped mine in a firm grip.

"Emmett McCarty. I've come to check everything over, and sort out
when we're good to go."

"Please call me Bella," I insisted as he retrieved a roll of paper from the
passenger side of the truck.

He unravelled it onto the hood, and I stared at the image of what my
house was going to look like when it was finished. It would be beautiful
and I simply couldn't wait.

We walked around the house talking through ideas and options for
different areas. Emmett had sucked his teeth a few times, telling me
certain choices would be very expensive. I'd explained cost wasn't an
issue, this was my home, and I wanted it perfect. He seemed happy
enough with that and jotted notes down on a small pad.

Edward was coming up the steps, as we were exiting the house. He
was panting heavily and sweating. I came into direct contact with his
wet chest, and his hands shot out to grip my shoulders. He'd taken off
his wife beater, and it was now dangling from his shorts.

"Sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going," he said panting.

"I see that by the fact I nearly ended up on my back!"

He smirked suggestively and whispered, "If I'm going to get you on your
back, I can guarantee there won't be anyone else around to witness it.
That would be between you and me."

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I think I swallowed my tongue, because I couldn't think of anything witty
to say back. I wasn't sure I could even breathe.

"Hey man, what you doin' here?" Edward asked Emmett.

He switched from seductive to casual so quickly my head spun. It was
only when they began laughing and joking, that I snapped out of my
mushy Edward trance.

"Do you two know each other?"

"Hell yes!" Emmett yelled, and smacked Edward on the back. "Your
man and I go way back."

"Oh! He isn't my man," I protested, trying to put some distance between
us.

Edward wasn't having any of it though. He pulled my body to his and
wrapped his arm around my waist.

"Now come on, BB. You said you forgave me."

I shrugged him off, glaring at him, as Emmett roared with laughter.

"Still a smooth talker then E? Look, I've got another appointment. I'll be
back tomorrow to start. I'll bring the landscaper with me as well. You'll
like Jasper. He's a bit quiet, but he's cool. Later!"

He waved and jumped the steps, before ambling to his truck.

I was still staring at Edward, hoping he would account for his actions.
When he said nothing, I had no choice but to react.

"What the hell was that?"

He shrugged, before asking what I was going on about.

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I watched a bead of sweat trickle from just below his earlobe to pool in
the cleft at the base of his throat. My tongue skimmed across the back
of my teeth. It wanted to taste him.

"I'm not yours, Edward!" I stated defiantly.

He snorted and pulled the wife beater from his shorts. I watched,
transfixed as he patted his chest dry.

"You are. You always have been. You just don't realize it, BB."

And with that little bombshell he turned and raced upstairs, yelling about
taking a bath.

I was his?

I always had been?

My body came alight with the words. I could see living with Edward
Masen was going to prove more difficult than I'd first envisioned.

Still liking?

I've done a Darkward one shot for the 'In the Dark' contest. Link is
in my profile if you haven't read it yet.

So who's POV would you like next? Review and let me know...

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5. Chapter 5: Water

So, most of you asked for Edward's Pov... here it is.

I've been a bit fail in replying to reviews the last chapter. I did reply
to a lot, but I will get around to you all. Sorry :(

Thanks to my beautiful beta team of Maylin & Twirlgrrl. I love you
ladies.

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward is all mine. Jealous?

EPOV

I groaned and tried to turn over, but the confines of the couch were
extremely limited. The contractors had started renovations and my head
was pounding with the incessant hammering. If that wasn't enough the
radio was blaring, and the weed whacker was buzzing in the garden. A
bit of silence was clearly too much to ask. Did no one give a shit? This
was my bedroom!

This room had been my bedroom for many years, until Aro had died. I'd
moved into his room shortly after, more out of necessity than want.
However, I wanted to be back up there now. With my Bella.

I growled and threw the blanket off myself and onto the floor. It was
getting harder to sleep at night, knowing she was upstairs tossing and
turning in my bed without me. It now looked like I wasn't going to be
able to sleep late either.

I was stomping into the kitchen, when I walked into a brick wall, or
rather what was known to the rest of us as Emmett.

"Morning, Sunshine!"

5. Chapter 5: Water

I huffed in response. I couldn't be perky on so little sleep.

"Coffee?" he asked, holding a chipped mug out to me.

I nodded and tried to get my hair under control. I gave up after a couple
of strokes, it would never lie flat, and so it was a waste of time trying.

"Grouchy this morning, E?" Emmett chuckled and shoved at my
shoulder.

I stumbled backwards and glared at him, but it only made him laugh
harder. I'd known Emmett for almost as long as I'd been pining after
Bella. I'd met him at school shortly after moving in with Aro. He'd been
feeling up Jessica in class, and I warned him that the teacher was
walking towards us. He was very grateful, and we spent most of our
time together after that. He didn't know about Bella, nor was I about to
explain. I took a sip of coffee, remembering the trouble we used to get
into.

Emmett was always one for impressing girls. That was until he'd met
Rose.

"Sorry Em, how's it going?"

"Awesome, man. Company's doing well. Rose and Garrett are perfect."

Emmett had always amazed me. He and Rose were childhood
sweethearts, but when Rose discovered she was pregnant at
seventeen, things changed. Most kids would have run a mile however,
Emmett had been ecstatic. She'd given birth to Garrett and a few years
later they'd married. Rose and Emmett were still one of the happiest
couples I knew. They gave me hope.

"I saw Garrett on the beach the other day. Damn he's huge now! Takes
after you," I stated.

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Em grinned like the proud father he was, but ducked his head
sheepishly and rubbed at the back of his neck. He was hiding
something.

"What?"

"Rose is finally pregnant. I'm gonna be a daddy again."

I slapped him on the back, telling him just how happy I was for them
both, but I was jealous too. I wanted what he had so much. My own
family.

"It's early days yet, but we're keeping our fingers crossed this time.
Rose is delighted. She says this time it feels right. Whatever the hell
that means."

His face was bright and shining with happiness.

"I'm pleased for you, Em. It really is great news. I'll sort out some
flowers for Rose, but tell her I said congratulations anyway."

The smile never left his face as he chatted about making the crib
himself, and decorating the nursery. He had so much love for his family.
When I thought of mine, I always pictured Bella. My Bella. Our children
would have her eyes and my messy hair.

We'd have three.

In my head I had it all mapped out. This would be our home, we would
marry on the beach, and our children would play happily on Bella's
swing.

Was I stupid to wait around for someone I never really knew? It wasn't
like I'd pined for her and not tried to find someone else, because I had.
None of them held my interest like Bella. Some hadn't even held it long
enough for me to find out their names. None of them had been back to

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this house.

"E, are you listening?"

His booming voice startled me from my trance.

"Sorry, I was miles away."

He nodded knowingly, before laughing.

"Dude, you've got it bad!"

I was on the verge of asking him to elaborate when Bella strolled into
the kitchen. My heart raced, and my stomach did somersaults. I tried to
calm myself by breathing steadily, but just gazing at her sent my body
into flux. She looked stunning. Her hair was tied up haphazardly on her
head, and little tendrils had escaped, hanging down her neck. They
were begging for me to touch them, or tuck them behind her ear. Her
cheeks glowed petal pink and her eyes were glinting playfully.

"Good morning, BB," I said teasingly.

Her brown eyes bore into mine, which made Emmett snort. He finished
his coffee quickly and muttered about returning to work. Bella was still
glowering at me.

"What?"

Her eyes rolled, as she huffed in exasperation.

"Like you don't know! Clothes, Edward. Put. Them. On!"

"I have some on," I smirked.

I could see her annoyance building, as she exhaled loudly, and
gestured to my crotch with her hands.

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"Underwear! You have underwear on, and that's not exactly classed as
clothing."

"You're such a prude. It's going to be so much fun corrupting you, BB."

Her right eye brow quirked upwards, waiting for my response.

"Never!" she retorted, and pushed me out of the way so she could pour
a cup of coffee.

I took the opportunity for what it was, and studied her from behind. My
eyes were instantly drawn to her petite peach of an ass. She couldn't
complain about my lack of attire given the size of her shorts. They were
tiny, and I muttered thanks to whatever store she'd purchased them
from.

I tilted my head, hoping to see a small slither of buttock from under the
hem. The hem was incredibly short, and just when I thought I had it,
Bella turned and shot me the same look of chastisement a toddler got
from its mom.

I tried to feign innocence, but knew I wasn't pulling it off. Instead I
diverted her attention.

"What've you been up to? You look flushed."

I tried desperately not to check out her tits, but it was near impossible
with the tight white tank she wore.

"I've been in the garden with Newton. He won't leave me alone. Damn
dog follows me everywhere. He even slept at the foot of my bed last
night."

"Lucky Newton," I muttered, watching her lips pout around the edge of
the mug.

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My balls grew tight. I definitely had it bad if I was getting horny over
someone drinking coffee.

"I take it you just woke up?"

I nodded, grumbling about the noise. Bella chose to ignore my
complaints.

"I need to go into town tomorrow. We need groceries."

She leaned back against the counter and took another sip from her cup.
I loved the way she said 'we'. We needed groceries. With those three
words, I realized this was real. She was here with me, and we were
actually living together. She was just completely blind to what was going
on under the surface. That would take time, and I would need to let her
know about my feelings for her slowly. Otherwise I risked scaring her
away.

I mentally thanked her dick of a husband for his stupidity. Without him
acting like a moron, Bella, wouldn't have come back here.

We were both locked in our own thoughts. Silence surrounded us, but it
wasn't the kind that needed to be filled. It was comfortable. I watched
her drain the mug and place it into the sink.

"Do you have keys to the barn?" she asked tentatively.

"Yup."

"You need to open it up. Emmett wants to know what you want done to
it. I'm sure you won't have an issue telling him what you want, you guys
seem pretty friendly."

I chuckled and prowled closer to her. She pulled back a little, but had
nowhere to go, because I pinned her to the counter, and I rested my
hands on the wood. They were on either side of her hips, but I wanted

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to hold her, touch her.

"Are you jealous of my friendship with our contractor?" I asked playfully.

"Seriously? I'm just making an observation."

She began teasing her lower lip with her teeth. Bella was definitely
irritated.

I lowered my head closer to hers. The pale skin on her neck was calling
for me to kiss it, lick it, devour it. I gripped the counter to stop the urge
from overpowering me.

"What else have you observed about me, BB?" I whispered seductively
into her hair.

Bella brought her lips to my ear. I suppressed a shiver that threatened
to wrack my body, when they touched the skin of my lobe. She was
playing me at my own game.

"I noticed..."She shoved hard at my chest, pushing me backwards,
before continuing, "...that you pay no attention to what I say!"

I rubbed my chest and smiled at her aggression.

"You'd be surprised what I pay attention to."

Bella held her hand out, silently requesting the keys to the barn. Without
conscious thought I slipped my hand into hers. A blaze swept up my
arm and shot to my heart at the contact. Having her so close was
whittling away at my composure.

Bella eyed me anxiously, waiting for my next move. She'd hadn't taken
her hand from mine though; definite progress. I tugged her closer,
making sure she connected with my chest. She gasped, and I entwined
our fingers together, biting down a smile.

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I wanted to hear that gasp again, but for an entirely different reason. My
need for her was building by the day. Each touch burned a little more
furiously. Each night my heart ached a little more, when she said
goodnight, and went upstairs to bed without me.

Emmett was right. I did have it bad.

I dragged her towards the front door and said gruffly, "Come on, I have
something to show you."

She sighed, her shoulders sagging in defeat before she whined,
"Edward, I just want the keys to the barn."

I slipped my sneakers on, leaving my hand grieving for hers, and pulled
on a black hoodie. She giggled.

"You're going outside? In your underwear?"

Bella walked slowly from the house, and I patted her ass mischievously.

"Get over yourself, Swan. You seem to have a fascination with my
undergarments!"

I whistled for Newton, and ran off towards the barn, hoping she would
follow.

"Edward!" she yelled over the noise of the lawn mower. I kept running
until I reached the barn, and opened the doors before she eventually
stomped over.

"You're such a child," she puffed. "You never gave up wanting girls to
chase you then?"

"Only one, BB. There was only ever one."

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I strolled inside, leaving her confused expression behind. Sometimes I
couldn't stop the words spilling from my lips. She must have some idea
by now that I at least found her attractive, but she never seemed to
question it. Just like yesterday on the swing. My mouth had been
watering to kiss her, but again, I was worried about rushing her. I'd had
a long time to get accustomed to my feelings, to Bella this was new.

She'd never complained about the little kiss on her nose, but then she
never referred to it either. That left me constantly questioning my
actions.

"What's in all the boxes?" she asked coming to stand beside me. "Are
these all yours?"

"No. These are all yours now. They're things of Aro's I saved for you. I
thought you'd want them."

"You saved them for me?" she whispered, as if she didn't quite believe
it.

My throat constricted. She looked so thankful. I nodded, not trusting
myself to speak.

I was suddenly surrounded by Bella, as she flung her arms around my
neck. She mumbled a million 'thank yous' into my neck. I closed my
eyes and wrapped my arms around her, trailing my hand gently down
her back. Her hair smelled of the cherry shampoo she used, and I filled
my lungs with it. She felt perfect against my body, a complete puzzle
piece.

I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling of her in my embrace. Exactly
where she should be, but all too soon she became embarrassed of her
actions and tried to pull away. Her arms unwound from around my neck,
but mine moved only to her hips. I was intent on keeping her close.
When she didn't pull away, I smiled warmly.

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"You might not even like the things I've saved."

"I'm sure they will be just right. Oh, Edward you have no idea how
happy I am."

I knew. When I was packing a lot of the items I knew one day Bella
would see them and appreciate the time it took.

"Where should I start?" she asked assessing the boxes.

I linked her fingers with mine and pulled her over to a smaller one.

"This is the one I think you'll like the most."

She stood gazing at the box and squeezing my hand tightly. I could
sense how nervous she was, so I made her sit on an old wooden stool,
and proceeded to open it for her. I reached inside and retrieved a
slightly crumpled box.

"This was your Christmas gift from Aro. Except your mom wouldn't
accept it and sent it back."

I passed it to her and watched her eyes light up in glee.

"A Cabbage Patch doll? Oh my God, my mom never let me have one,
and I had one waiting for me all this time?"

Bella tore the box open and pulled the chubby baby out. She hugged it,
just like a child.

"What else," she asked excitedly.

I handed her a huge piece of driftwood, making her inhale in surprise.

"Aro kept this?"

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He'd kept it as a constant reminder that I'd been knocked unconscious
by a girl. He used to keep it on the shelves in the living room and would
look at it laughing to himself.

Bella and I had been running around on the beach and throwing sand at
each other. She'd been so taken with our play, she hadn't realized until
it was too late what she'd flung in my direction. The driftwood had hit me
so hard, I'd been knocked out. Aro had told me she'd cried until I came
around.

I nodded at her, and rubbed my head, as if it still hurt.

"I'm really sorry I hurt you, Edward."

She'd already apologized many times, so I ignored her and went back
to the box. Next was a pile of birthday and Christmas cards that Aro had
sent, but were returned by her mother. She got annoyed at that point.
Bella clearly had no idea what Aro had tried to do just to get to see her.
All the while she cuddled the doll to her chest.

I was now envious of a fat plastic baby.

"Can I ask you something?"

Bella raised her eyebrows in response. I assumed it was a 'yes', so
carried on.

"Why didn't you contact Aro? I mean when you got older, and were no
longer beholden to your mother?

I leaned against the wall of the barn and waited for her to answer. She
shook her head and replied quietly.

"My mom was far from kind about Granddad, and I believed her. I was
young and didn't understand. I really didn't know Aro was grieving for
me, or sending me cards and presents. I certainly never got any. The

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first I heard about any of this was when his lawyer, Marcus? When he
tracked me down and told me he'd died and had left me something."

"Marcus is a very old friend of Aro's," I replied. "He knew the situation
between your mom and him, though wasn't sure where to contact you. I
gave him the name of the last magazine you worked at and he found
you from there."

I sounded like a stalker, given all the things I knew about her. However
Bella seemed too focused on the cards and gifts.

"He tried a lot then?" she asked sullenly.

I walked over to her and knelt beside the stool. Her eyes were
swimming with emotion, and all I wanted to do was hug her tightly to my
chest.

"As you got older he hoped you would contact him. He never gave up
hope, BB."

"Don't be nice to me, Edward. I failed him, didn't I? His only grandchild
and I abandoned him, and only returned because he'd died, leaving me
with the house."

I touched her knee, meaning it as a soothing gesture, but it felt so right.
My skin next to hers.

"You didn't fail him. You were just led to believe many things about him.
I think we could do with having a talk about the real Aro. Think about it
Bella, he couldn't have been the ogre your mother painted him out to
be, if he took me in. I was nothing to him, and yet, he was willing to give
me a home, and parent me, just because I wanted to stay in La Push.
He was good to me."

"I know, and that's why I feel like such an asshole now. I could have
contacted him, but simply believed what I was told," she berated.

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"And what was that? No, wait," I said holding my hand up. "I bet I can
guess. Was he cruel to your mom? Maybe he kicked her out? Maybe he
didn't like the fact that she and Charlie split."

She snorted, confirming the latter.

"Yeah, I thought it would be something as transparent as that. If that
was the case, then why did he keep in contact with Charlie? Come to
think of it, why didn't Charlie tell you Aro wanted to see you?"

Bella shrugged, "Maybe he didn't want to cause any more problems
with Mom. I don't know, Edward. My head hurts with all this. There are
so many lies that have been told. So much time lost."

"I know, but we can fix that," I uttered, meaning much more than she
realized. "Look, here are the keys, do you want to stay here a while and
look through the rest of them? I'll leave you alone."

I stood up, intending to walk away, but she held my wrist and pulled me
back. I closed my eyes, fighting the ever increasing onslaught of
emotions. They bubbled so close to the surface now.

"Stay with me. Show me what else there is, something that will make
me smile."

So that's what I did. I showed her every gift Aro had bought her. She'd
shed a tear at the silver bangle he bought her for her sixteenth, and
again at the silver hoop earrings for her eighteenth. I smiled
affectionately as she made me put them on her.

We found old pails of seashells, and little chains made with paper
flowers. Bella screamed when she opened a book and a spider came
running out at her. I personally hadn't seen it, but was more than happy
to hold her in case it came back to bite her. We laughed at the old
cassette player with Madonna and Billy Idol albums. We decided to take
it back to the house later and see if it still worked.

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Bella giggled hysterically at the photos we found in the bottom of the
third box. They were all of us on the beach, or in the garden. A couple
had been taken without our knowledge and were ones I'd never seen. I
made a mental note to come back later to collect them, because I didn't
have any pockets to put them in now. One of them was us playing on
the swing. I was holding the ropes and looking down at her, a huge grin
spreading across my face. It wasn't very different from the positions
we'd found ourselves in yesterday.

I watched her, as she touched the photograph. She had a wistful look
on her face, as if trying to recall that very day.

"Do you remember that being taken?" I asked, hoping.

I wanted to hear the memory coming from her lips, but she shook her
head.

"No, I wish I did. It looks like we were having fun."

"We always had fun." I reached for her hand and pulled her up off the
floor. "Come on, we need to make some lunch. We've been in here for
hours."

She dusted off her ass, and I groaned out loud at the sight of her
slapping her buttocks. I turned and walked from the barn into the
garden. The landscaper placed the hose on the grass and walked
towards his van. He'd made a lot of progress on the garden while we'd
been reminiscing.

"You checking out the talent?" Bella asked teasing.

I kept walking, but turned and stuck my tongue out at her. She raced
towards me and slapped my ass, running away quickly.

"Ouch!"

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"Such a baby," she giggled.

I raised my brows, stalking slowly back towards her.

"Baby, huh?"

She licked her lips, as I got closer, making my groin twitch and my
mouth salivate. Christ, I wanted this woman.

Each step I took towards her made her eyes go wider. I had to give her
credit though, she didn't retreat. She stood defiantly before me, ready
for battle. I flicked my arm out and picked the nozzle of the garden hose
up quickly. I was rewarded with her surprise gasp.

"Oh, yes, dear Isabella. We shall see who the baby is now."

Bella held her hands up in complete surrender, and I shook my head,
smirking at her.

"Nuh uh, you wanted to play." I pressed the trigger, spraying water
across her hands and over her chest. "So I'm playing! Run!"

She squealed loudly, running around the garden, as I continued to soak
her. The water seeped into her shorts and tank. They stuck to her like a
second skin, but it didn't seem to bother her. It was only when she
stopped running that I noticed just how transparent the material had
become. I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat, and stared
at her.

Isabella Swan was everything I'd ever wanted and more. She stood
before me her chestnut hair tangled and drenched with the water. Her
eyes were hooded, but still held a glint of mischief. The ends of her hair
dripped onto her chest, and I could see the outline of her dark pert
nipples. My fingers itched to tease them, to tug them until she was
writhing in need for me.

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I trailed my gaze further down to her little belly button. The sight made
my tongue swirl seductively in my mouth. It wanted a taste of the skin,
to dip into the tiny crevices and tantalize.

I looked up startled by a noise.

Did she moan? I'm sure she moaned.

Her cheeks were pink from the exertion, so I couldn't really distinguish if
she was embarrassed.

"Bella, I..." I started to say softly, but was cut short when Newton raced
towards us and jumped up at me.

I wasn't prepared and tumbled down on Bella. She huffed as she landed
on her back; my body lay over her, chest to chest, nose to nose. Neither
of us moved, as we lay frozen in our precarious position. If I moved
Bella would feel my instant arousal, but if she moved I knew the same
would occur.

I watched her tongue dart out and wet her lower lip. It glistened in the
sun and made me want to lap at it. My body was humming to the same
frequency as hers. I could hear her breathing, smell her cherry scent,
and could feel those damn nipples boring holes into my chest.

I wanted her.

I was tired of waiting.

I was going to kiss my BB.

SQUEE!

Come and play on the Tides thread. (link in my profile) Violi makes
it pretty with Rob porn :)

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What's your fav toy from childhood? Press that box and let me
know...please...

Take me over 1k and you get 10 minutes with Erectionward.

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6. Chapter 6: Fairytales

I keep saying it, but I'm honestly amazed at how many people like
this.

Thanks go to my beta team. Maylin & Twirlgrrl. You're both
awesome!

Thanks to the UU, Twilighted & Twitter ladies. You keep me
smiling.

Love to hunterhunting... thank you so much for prereading
Erectionward.

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward is mine, mine, mine!

BPOV

Was it normal to hate someone you didn't know?

I did. I hated Jasper Hale, the landscaper. Edward had tumbled on top
of me, and my whole body screamed 'YES'! His lips had been
precariously close to mine, and my mouth watered, waiting for the
contact. However Jasper had seen the dog run into us, and felt the
need to help out. He pulled Edward from my incredibly aroused body
and held his hand out to help me up.

I could have punched him.

However, now I looked back, it was probably the best thing to happen. I
couldn't imagine the atmosphere in the house after we'd made the
mistake of kissing. We knew nothing about each other, and I was
getting out of something too messy to comprehend. I hadn't even told
Edward exactly what had happened with Tyler.

6. Chapter 6: Fairytales

My attraction to him confused me. I should be annoyed by his presence.
It was my house, and he treated it like home. His constant touching, and
the way he invaded my personal space should irritate me too, but it
didn't. In fact, I found it thrilling, and often wanted more.

The sensations he'd caused when his body was settled on top of mine
had been unlike anything I'd felt before. I was aroused hours after it,
and had considered taking matters into my own hands. I'd settled for a
cold bath before bed.

I didn't know how to deal with someone like Edward. I'd had little
experience with someone so comfortable in their own skin. He was
perfectly at ease with the person he'd become, and it was becoming
oddly freeing to be around him. I hoped some of his confidence would
rub off on me.

Maybe he could rub something else too?

Argh! I'd come here to be alone, but as the days passed I became more
grateful Edward was here with me. I just hated Jasper Hale and his
chivalrous ways. I'd expected the atmosphere to be awkward between
us, but Edward continued with his subtle touches, insinuating
comments. I could lie to myself and say that I hated them, but the truth
was I was starting to need them. I swooned when he held the door open
for me, because he would always place his palm at the base of my
spine as I walked through it. I adored the way he held my hand, and
virtually dragged me towards things he wanted to show me. Sometimes
Edward Masen was no different than the little boy I once knew.

Only this time he was hot, and my body went into overdrive.

The trip to the grocery store had been enlightening, to say the least.
He'd raced around placing random boxes and cartons into the shopping
cart. It was only later when I'd unpacked them onto the kitchen counter
that I'd paid attention to what they were.

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It was like a child's heaven. Reese's cups, Lucky Charms, Popsicles,
Pepsi and chips. I'd assumed he took care of himself, given his muscle
tone and all the running he did, but the evidence in front of me told me a
very different story. I'd started to tease him, by snatching the goods and
threatening not to give them back. Edward had pinned me to the
counter, a position I was growing to like very much, and brought his lips
to my ear. He hadn't uttered a single word, but the feel of his breath on
my neck melted me into a pile of goo. I'd dropped the goodies and he
moved away smirking wildly. Sometimes I think he actually got off on
the fact that I became incoherent around him.

So now I was trying to avoid him. I'd set up my laptop around the back
of the house, and was browsing for a refrigerator, and a shower. I
missed taking a shower. My cell buzzed, interrupting my small moment
of silence, as Emmett took a break. I groaned when I saw it was my
mom.

"Hi," I greeted her, trying to sound happy at hearing her voice.

"Isabella, why haven't you called me? I told you I wanted to hear from
as soon as you arrived," she demanded.

I bit back a sigh. My mother was another reason I'd decided to come
here. She never treated me as an adult. I would be eternally eight years
old to her, and after a while that got very tedious.

"I was busy, Mom, sorry. The house is a bit the worse for wear, and the
cell service here isn't great either. In fact this line is terribly faint. I can
barely hear you over the crackling," I lied.

"So the house is still standing then? I thought he'd let it go to rack and
ruin. I told you it would cost a lot to get it fixed up."

My mother loved the words 'I told you so'. She would repeat them to me
as often as possible.

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"It's not that bad, and I've got a great contractor. He's actually friends
with..."

I stopped myself. Telling her about Edward would be like hitting a
hornets' nest. She'd come racing down here and scream about it being
my inheritance. It simply wasn't worth the hassle where Renee was
concerned, so I closed my mouth. She didn't catch my slip though, she
was too busy wittering on about Aro leaving the house to me, and it
should have been hers.

"You know Dad would always leave things until the last minute, before
getting them fixed. He literally..."

I took the cell from my ear and placed it on the table, not even bothering
to place it on loud speaker. I didn't care what she had to say, and I
wouldn't let her malice pollute my special haven. She could moan on to
herself while I finished purchasing my new goods.

I browsed a few websites, still hearing her faint mumblings, but her
voice was never truly audible. When Emmett's drill started back up I
ended the call, not bothering to say goodbye. I felt mean, and incredibly
guilty, but sometimes my mother was too much. It was no wonder Aro
had stayed away so long, with such an ungrateful daughter I would
have stayed away too.

The wind started to pick up and I shuddered. I didn't want to go inside.
Emmett was working and there was dust and debris everywhere. I tried
to ignore the goose bumps that sprang up my arms from the cold.

I had emails to catch up on, and at some point I needed to contact the
magazine to get my next assignment. I couldn't remain without an
income forever. The renovations being done to the house would sap all
my resources. I'd taken leave for two months, unsure of what I'd find,
but I could easily work around the contractor. Edward seemed perfectly
capable of working at night. I could try that.

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The instant I thought of him, the hairs on the back of my neck stood on
end. He was here, somewhere near me. My body responded to him,
even when I wasn't aware of his proximity. I stared at the screen, not
wanting to acknowledge how hyper aware I was of his presence.

"Are you hiding out?" his velvet voice floated from behind me.

I felt my nipples harden, but convinced myself it was the cold. There
was no way Edward Masen could arouse me by his voice alone. That
was something I was determined not to acknowledge.

I remained silent and fixated on the screen, but within seconds I could
feel the heat rolling off his body in waves, as he stood behind me. I
swallowed hard, and tried to sooth my erratic heartbeat.

"Showers? Interesting," he muttered.

I spun my head around, preparing myself for his lack of attire and the
impact it would have on me. However, I was more than a little
disappointed when I saw he was still wearing the dark jeans and white
polo t-shirt that he'd worn to the store. I raised my brows at him, waiting
for him to elaborate. Edward smirked, but said nothing further.

He was beginning to infuriate me.

"Why is a shower interesting?" I ground out.

Edward moved forward and leant over the table to look at the laptop
closely. His neck was exposed and so close to my mouth. I could smell
the musky maleness of him, and I salivated.

"Well, this one," he stated, pointing at the screen. "...will never fit both of
us in. That could cause a problem."

I rolled my eyes, even though he had his back to me. He was such a
cocky bastard. Did he really think I was going to christen the new

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shower with him? The moment I thought it, images flooded my mind.

Water slipping across Edwards shoulders.

Rivulets running across his chest, and down his abs.

I mentally followed the path the water made over his stomach, and
pooling in his naval.

The soap suds would skim the 'v' marling his hips and work their way
towards his...

"Bella? Helllooo?"

I felt my cheeks burn instantly with embarrassment. I couldn't look him
in the eyes, but his low chuckle alerted me to his awareness. Edward
knew I was ashamed of something, because my blush always gave me
away.

"It's not your decision what type of shower I purchase," I retorted tartly.
"You aren't the one paying for it."

"I'm happy to provide whatever you need," he stated as he pulled out
the chair next to me. He wiggled his eyebrows playfully and confirmed,
"Anything at all."

I watched him throw the cigarette box onto the table and place one in
his mouth. I'd always found it a disgusting habit, but on Edward it was
highly sensual. The way his lips pursed around the end and sucked
gently. He'd always lick his lips a little after removing it. It left his full
bottom lip shiny and extremely inviting.

I was doing it again. I needed to stop thinking of him in that way. I'd not
come here to be with anyone but myself. I needed to find out what I
wanted. I cleared my throat, and decided to ignore his innuendo.

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"It's my shower, and I'll buy whichever one I please. If you don't like it,
pick your own. You know- the one you'll be using in the barn."

He sucked on the cigarette again, and his lips made a slight pop when
he released it, before stating huskily, "There won't be a need to have a
shower in the barn, Bella."

"And why not? Are you not planning on washing yourself?" I asked
petulantly.

"Because," he drawled as he lifted his legs and placed his feet in my
lap. "There will be a perfectly good bathroom here, and if you get the
shower I want, it will be even better."

Dear Lord, he never quit. I thought he'd accepted the fact that the barn
would be his. Aro's lawyer was coming here next week to iron out the
details, but Edward was still digging his heels in...literally, he was
swirling his heel in my lap. I stared at him, as he smiled innocently. He
didn't stop though. He continued to massage his feet into my thigh. It
was snaking closer towards the apex, closer to his goal. I slapped at his
ankle, but he still didn't remove them.

"Edward," I warned.

"BB," he mirrored.

"Why do you call me that?"

He chuckled. "I've always called you that. Don't you remember?"

"Of course I remember, but I never knew why. What does it stand for?"

The wind whipped up, and I felt a drop of rain against my arm. I
shivered and wrapped my shawl tighter around my shoulders.

"Try to guess," he asked casually.

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"Edward, I have no idea. Bratty Bella? Boring Bella? Bloody Brunette? I
don't know!"

"Well, think about it. When you have a better answer I'll tell you if you're
right, but, Bella? Only come to me when you're truly ready to hear the
answer, because what I have to say may just surprise you."

I was taken aback by his cryptic response, and wanted to question him
further. However, Emmett came out of the house, carrying his radio.
The music cut through our conversation, and effectively ended it.

"Right people, I'm done for the day. Did Jasper go already?"

I nodded at the same time Edward grunted. Emmett looked quickly
between us both and rubbed his hands together.

"I'm interrupting, sorry. I'll be back tomorrow. Later,people!"

With that he bounded down the porch steps and out to his truck.

"Thank you!" I shouted to his back. He waved in response. I was
growing to like Emmett very much. He was like a big kid, and just as
with Edward, it was becoming infectious.

It left us alone again, with the rain beginning to pour. I switched off the
laptop, and pushed Edward's feet from my lap. I started to stand when
he held his hand out to me.

"What?" I questioned.

"Oh for God's sake! I was only trying to help you up. Why do you
question everything?"

He stood up, but kept his hand out, waiting for me to accept it. I
cautiously placed my palm flat against his, and instantly felt the sparks
zip up my arm. My fingers tingled and arousal swirled low in my belly.

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Everything about him lured me in; his eyes, his scent, his cocky yet cute
attitude. It was as though he was made specifically for me.

"You've gone all serious. What's wrong?" Edward asked softly.

"Nothing. I was just thinking. Let's go inside."

He pulled me closer to him, as a new song began to play on the radio.
My shawl slipped from my shoulders and cascaded to the floor.

"Will you do something for me first?"

I frowned, not sure what he'd want me to do right now, but couldn't stop
my head nodding.

Traitor!

Edward pulled me from the porch and into the rain. I squealed, making
him laugh. His eyes shone, and his smile was huge. He liked teasing
me.

"No! Edward, it's cold and wet. Please, let's go inside."

"BB," he whispered. "Dance with me."

Was it possible for bone to turn to jelly with only three simple words? I'm
pretty sure that's what my legs did at his question. I didn't answer him.
He pulled me to his chest and wrapped his arms around my waist. The
rain was pouring down on us, soaking our clothes, but all I could feel
was Edward. The way his body fit next to mine, the way his arms
wrapped snugly around me, encompassing me in his scent. I knew I
should stand my ground and pull away, but I couldn't.

The music floated around us, as Edward began making our bodies
sway.

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May be surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

I moved my hands and tucked them into the back pockets of his jeans.
Only a thin layer of denim stopped my fingers touching his ass. I giggled
a little at the thought.

"What's so funny?" Edward rumbled.

"I'm dancing in the rain," I stated into his chest.

He pulled back a little and frowned. I watched a raindrop dangle from
his lip, and all I could think about was licking it off. Edward stopped
moving when I didn't respond, and I shook my head slightly, trying to
restore my thoughts.

"Erm, oh! I mean it's not something I've ever done. When it rains, I stay
inside, not purposefully come out and dance in it."

"Really? Well I did say it would be fun corrupting you. Consider this your
first lesson."

He grinned down at me, and commenced our swaying. I couldn't help
smiling back, and moving right along with him.

And I feel just like I'm living someone else's life
It's like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
'Cause this was not your dream
But you always believed in me

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6. Chapter 6: Fairytales

I closed my eyes and rested my cheek against his wet t-shirt. I would
never have considered doing this with Tyler, and was still bewildered by
my reasons for doing this with Edward. If I was honest with myself I
wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

Dancing with Edward, in the pouring rain, while Michael Buble played
on the radio, felt right somehow.

Let me go home
I've had my run
Baby, I'm done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I'll be home tonight
I'm coming back home

Edward was humming along to the song, and I could feel the vibrations
reverberate through my body. I shivered, and it had nothing to do with
the cold, or the rain.

"I missed you, BB."

I looked up, stunned. Did he just admit to missing me?

"What did you..." I started to ask, but never finished. He took my hand
and started to twirl me around. I giggled and forgot what I was about to
ask. He spun me around one way and then slowly the next. I felt dizzy
from the dancing and from Edward. He was as intoxicating as a drug. I
was happy for the first time in a long time, and it really was all down to
him.

I pirouetted, and as I came towards his face I whispered 'thank you'. I
caught his smile before he twirled me under his arm, and when I
returned to him, he responded with 'my pleasure'.

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The song ended, but we didn't stop. Edward carried on moving us
around the garden, but I knew my coordination couldn't last forever. I
stumbled over a log and came crashing into Edward's chest. I gasped at
the contact, but Edward didn't seem to mind. In fact, he brought me
closer and cupped my chin with his fingers, lifting my face to his.

"Are you OK?" he asked.

I nodded and tried to look away but his fingers wouldn't allow me the
movement.

"My foot may bruise, but I'm not really hurt. Thanks for saving me," She
whispered breathlessly

His expression grew serious and his arms tightened around me.

"Anytime, Bella. I will happily be your Knight."

"I don't believe in them, but it's nice of you to say so."

Edward's eyes stared at me, his brow furrowing a little, before asking,
"What don't you believe in?"

I snorted.

"Knights, shining armor, fairy tales and happy bloody endings. They all
crumble in the end, because nothing is as it seems. People especially.
They start off all nice, and cute, but pretty soon you're walking in on
them while they're giving the local bar owner a blow job."

I groaned, because I seriously hadn't meant for that to slip out. Fuck!

"What are you talking ab...Tyler?" Edward growled. "He had an affair
with a man? You caught him? Oh, BB, I'm so sorry you had to see that.
What a fucking moron! Christ, Bella, what he did was wrong, but you do
understand that doesn't mean the fairy tale is over for you."

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"I don't think there was ever a page in the book for me," I said solemnly.

Edward shook his head defiantly. He was still holding my chin, and
staring into my eyes. He wanted to make sure I understood he meant
what he was saying.

"Aro used to say something to me all the time, and I think you should
remember it. He would say, Boy, the tide will come and wash away your
sandcastle, but the sand's still there, allowing you to build something
new."

We said the last words in unison. I'd read Aro's letter so many times. I
knew exactly what he'd written.

"He told you that too?" Edward asked in wonder.

"No, he wrote it in the letter."

"Ah!" he nodded. "Aro was a very profound man. He would say shit like
that all the time. Sometimes it would just annoy me, because I couldn't
understand his logic. The sandcastle analogy stuck with me though.
You will get your page in the fairy tale, BB. I can assure you of that."

"How? How can you be so certain?" I whispered.

My heart begun to race, and my whole body was resonating at
Edward's frequency. I'd never been this bold with my words before. I
was asking him if he was interested in me. I was asking him to show
me.

I was playing with fire, but I couldn't remove my fingers. They itched to
touch the flame.

His eyes sparkled in the darkness, and the rain caught on his lashes
reminded me of tiny gems, glinting as he blinked.

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"BB..." he uttered reverently.

His Adams apple bobbed as he swallowed. Was he as aware of the
atmosphere between us as I? Could he really deny the crackling around
us? The magnetic pull? I watched him close his eyes for an instant and
inhale deeply. What was he thinking right at that moment? Was he
shutting out the world to make a decision about me? Before I had a
chance, Edward answered my question by lowering his lips to mine.

My whole body blazed from the instant his mouth touched mine. I never
dreamed you could lose yourself so completely in a kiss, but I could kiss
Edward for the rest of my life and never get enough. I could taste the
rain as he moved his lips seductively over mine. Its purity mingled with
Edward's sin. It was intoxicating.

He took it slow, as if savouring every drop of me. His left hand moved to
cup my neck, and his right gathered my wet hair in his fist and held it
tight. With anyone else the dominant edge would have scared me, but
with him it felt more like a desperation; a need to hold me as close to his
body as physically possible. I small whimper slipped from my mouth into
his as he tugged my hair a little. Edward took the opportunity to slide his
tongue slowly along my bottom teeth. It was highly arousing, and I
wanted more. Tentatively, I swirled my tongue towards his at the same
time a loud clap of thunder struck.

I broke apart from Edward, shocked by the noise, but also by what I was
doing. I covered my mouth with my hand, trying to even my breathing
out, but I couldn't stop replaying the kiss in my head. Wow, didn't even
come close.

I watched Edward; his chest was rising and falling as fast as my own.
He was watching me through hooded eyes; the rain and the darkness
gave him a slightly sinister edge. I opened my mouth, meaning to
apologize for my wantonness, but he brought his hand to my face and
skimmed my bottom lip with his thumb. I gasped when he pushed his
thumb into my mouth and skimmed it around my teeth. It was primal,

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visceral but so damn sexy. I wanted more.

"BB," he groaned and removed his hand.

I swallowed and tried to speak. It came out as a squeak.

"Come and find me when you're ready to finish what we just started.
Remember, it's your choice when your page gets written."

He didn't wait around for my response. He walked back into the house,
whistling for Newton. I was left alone in the rain, with my swollen lips
and an arousal so strong I was ready to turn and run after him. His kiss
had been dominant yet soft, wicked yet tender. It was completely alien,
but so thrilling.

I wanted my fairytale.

My only question was if Edward really was my Knight?

Thanks to Bitemypillows, for the song choice. Home - Michael
Buble.

A kiss! Just what you were all waiting for!

Where was your most memorable kiss?

Reviews will have Erectionward naked in the rain!

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6. Chapter 6: Fairytales

7. Chapter 7: Towels

WOW.

I know I keep saying it, but I really am blown away. Thank you to
everyone reviewing, alerting & pimpin my little fic out!

Love for my awesome pre reader - hunterhunting.

Thanks to my beta team- Maylin & Twirlgrrl.

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward is still all mine.

EPOV

It was pure torture.

Living with Isabella Swan, the woman who featured in every fantasy I'd
ever had, was pure hell. It was a million times worse, now that I'd
actually tasted her. I'd kissed her in the rain and fulfilled a dream. It had
been better than I'd ever imagined, and I wanted more.

So much more.

I tried to be gentle; to be romantic, but I'd been waiting for her lips for so
long, that by the time my mouth connected with hers it was difficult to
rein myself in. I'd thought about what it would be like so often, that I
knew how I wanted it and where I wanted it. She didn't seem to mind
the slight hair pulling though, or the way I'd pushed my thumb into her
mouth. In fact, I could still feel the vibrations from her purr travelling
towards my cock.

...and there was my next problem. I'd promised myself I wouldn't jerk off
while Bella was in the house. I couldn't get the kiss out of my mind, and
even two days later I was struggling to keep my word. We'd carried on

7. Chapter 7: Towels

as if nothing had happened, and that's exactly what I thought she'd do.
Bella wasn't ready for me yet, but she would be. I had no doubt about
that. I'd tried to give her space, but my body would seek her out without
any conscious thought on my part. She'd blush with embarrassment
whenever I spoke to her, and she only ever mumbled back.

The nights had been the worst. When I lay on the couch, fitfully trying to
sleep, knowing she was in bed, warm and cosy. I'd actually gone
upstairs last night and just watched her through the gap in the door. I
felt like a fucking stalker, but it was an urge I couldn't resist. I wanted to
see her serene in slumber. Her hair had been spilling across my pillows,
and my comforter tangled around her waist. I was more than a little
disappointed that she was wearing a tank top. I would prefer her nude in
my bed. That way I could caress her and take her whenever the need
arose, and I could see it arising a lot.

She'd been braless though, and I could make out her dark nipples
through the thin white fabric. I'd groaned and walked back downstairs
before she caught me, or before I pounced.

Pervert.

Emmett had laughed when I'd told him what happened. He thought I'd
taken my sweet time, and had expected me to jump on her sooner. He
didn't really understand how patient I was when it concerned Bella. He
didn't know just how long I had waited for her.

Emmett had watched me in clubs, when I'd gone after a girl I wanted. I'd
been relentless, and I suppose my pace now was messing with his
head. But that was because he never knew about Bella. He never knew
my heart was already taken, those woman were mere distractions.

However, living so close to her was becoming excruciating. I was
walking around with a perpetual hard on. It was getting painful, and I
was in need of a release.

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I'd come upstairs to clean up, while Bella cooked dinner. Maybe
whacking off now would make dinner more comfortable. Emmett and
Jasper had gone home, so I knew I wouldn't be interrupted. Bella was
busy and would only be intruding on my thoughts. My dreams were full
of my BB, just remembering the touch of her lips, the taste of her kiss,
made me harder than I'd ever been. It was delicious, and yet painful at
the same time.

I soaped my body, trying to ignore the ache in my groin. It didn't last
though, because as soon as I skimmed my stomach, my arm hit my
erection, making me hiss. I couldn't carry on like this. The water in the
bath was growing cold, but I knew it wouldn't take long to take matters
in hand.

I soaped my palm with her cherry shampoo and closed my eyes,
instantly seeing my Bella. The image was of her wet in the rain. She
was giggling as I spun her in my arms. I touched my cock, stroking it
slowly, as a growl rumbled in my throat.

With each gentle pump I saw her face.

With each twist of my wrist I was rewarded by her delicate flush.

In my head she wanted me. In fact, she was begging for me to take her,
her doe eyes getting larger, as I flicked my thumb across my engorged
head. She licked her lips slowly and watched me, as I gripped my shaft
harder.

My Bella would want to kiss my cock, lick it from base to tip, before
swallowing me whole.

"Christ!" I snarled, as I began to pump faster.

The image of her on her knees, taking my cock between her rosebud
lips was better than any fucking porno I'd ever seen, and I'd watched a
few. My balls grew tight, as I pictured her cupping them, and teasing

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them softly.

I flicked my thumb across the tip again, and this time felt the first drop of
cum slide across the sensitive flesh. I trembled. Fuck! I'd never been
this aroused; this needy. I gripped harder, but in my head it was her hair
I held, thrusting her mouth hard onto my erection.

I gave a strangled cry, as I came. It was at the exact same time as
Bella's voice floated into the room.

"Edward? Are you OK?"

Fuuuucckk!

My stomach was in spasm, as I shot my load into the cold water. I didn't
trust myself to speak, because I knew it would come out as a high
pitched croak. So I remained as quiet as I could. It was pretty fucking
difficult, considering I was having one of the most intense orgasms of
my adult life.

"Edward?"

Balls!

I couldn't even form a coherent sentence. The first time I'd wanked in
days, and it was just my luck to be interrupted.

I stood up in the water at the same time Bella opened the bathroom
door and walked inside.

She squeaked and stood stock still, taking in my naked form. Her eyes
went wide, when they reached my cock.

My erect cock.

Which, I was holding in my hand.

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Shit!

I was going to apologize, but as usual, I couldn't stop a witty retort
escaping from my lips.

"Coming to join me?"

I raised a brow and waited for her response. Her cheeks flamed, along
with her chest.

Fuck that was beautiful.

"I thought...I shouted...I..," she stuttered.

I smirked, because she was still in the room and still staring at me. Most
people would have looked away, or left. She wasn't oblivious to our
chemistry, so I pushed a little further.

"You didn't answer my question, BB. Are you coming to join me?"

"Will you stop it?" She moaned.

"Stop what? Complimenting you?" I asked stepping out of the bath.

I smiled when she passed me a towel. Her hand shook.

"Should I stop flirting with you? Or touching you? Maybe I should stop
trying to kiss you also?"

"You haven't tried to kiss me. You haven't initiated anything since the
other ni..."

I loved the way her mouth opened, before her brain caught up. Those
little slips encouraged me like nothing else.

"Really? Does that mean you want me to kiss you?"

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I walked closer to her, licking my lips at the temptation. She worried the
hem of her top, as her eyes darted away from my chest.

"I didn't say that," she said nervously. "I was just stating a fact."

I tucked the towel around my waist. She gasped, as I sandwiched her
between me and the wall.

"All you have to do is ask, or initiate one yourself. I'm here. I'm waiting.
Fuck, BB, I've always been waiting."

I lowered my head to her neck and just inhaled her scent. I couldn't
distinguish the difference between us, having used her shampoo to
wank with. I fucking loved smelling of her.

I'd been wrong though. My erection was as needy as it had been before
I blew my load. I think it would only be truly satisfied after it had been
buried in Bella. I almost groaned at the thought. The temptation to take
her now, against the wall, was excruciating. She was even wearing a
skirt. Easy access.

"I don't understand," she whispered.

I moved my mouth to her ear, making sure my lips caressed her lobe
when I spoke.

"I don't think you ever truly will, not until you ask me. But you're not
ready for that quite yet, are you?"

I touched her leg and trailed my hand slowly up, under her skirt and
along her thigh. Bella swallowed audibly, but didn't stop me. I ran my
nose gently up and down her neck, closing my eyes and revelling in the
sensation. I was touching her and she was real, not some dream. This
was really how her skin felt pressed against mine. She shivered as my
breath tickled her flesh, and I blew across it gently, just to feel her
tremble again. I was torturing myself by doing this, but this was the

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closest I'd been to her in days. It was the closest she'd allowed me, so I
wouldn't stop.

My fingers reached the edge of her panties, and I bit back a moan. I
skimmed the sensitive crease where her thigh met her ass, and she
purred into my ear. It took every ounce of strength I had at that moment
not to grind myself into her, and show her what touching her body was
doing to me. I was always on the edge. Always ready to show her
exactly what she meant to me, but I knew she wasn't ready to
understand our fate. It would simply scare her to know just how long I'd
waited.

She didn't appear scared now though. Bella was lifting her leg, so I
could hook it around my knee. My fingers slipped inside the elastic of
her panties, and I skimmed the flesh of her ass with the pads of my
fingers. She moaned and rubbed herself against my erection.

"Ah, BB," I said softly.

She turned her face into my neck and nuzzled it. I almost shot my load
all over her pretty skirt. It was so devastatingly intimate. The kind of
thing lovers did in the mornings when they woke; nuzzling and
caressing each other awake. I wanted to do that with her, but not here
in the bathroom. Not when all we'd shared was a kiss in the rain. I'd
promised myself I'd do this properly, because she was more than just a
quick release. She was my sandcastle.

She was my forever.

This was going too well for me to piss it away with a quick fuck in the
bathroom. I slowly removed my hand from her panties, but continued to
stroke her thigh. I didn't want her to think I was rejecting her, because
that couldn't be further from the truth. I flicked her earlobe with the tip of
my tongue, before sucking on it.

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Bella moaned, and brought her fingers to skim my hips. It was
tantalizing and delicious the way they danced around the edge of the
towel. My head was screaming for her to remove it; for her to take the
lead and tell me that she wanted me. Wanted this. But she continued to
let me take charge, and decide where we went next with this.

I licked the shell of her ear, as I brought my hand up to cup her jaw. I
held it firmly and maybe a little aggressively, but my control around her
was slipping. Her hooded eyes stared seductively at me, and I was lost.
My mouth crashed to hers with an urgency I'd never felt. I didn't even
wait for her to completely relax into it, before I thrust my tongue in. I had
to taste her. The kiss in the rain had been cautious and new, but I
wanted it all.

I was more than a little surprised when she slid her tongue against
mine. I'd half expected her to back away. She was tentative in her
exploration, but it was perfect. Her taste was divine, and made for me. I
would always want more.

I groaned into her mouth as she dipped her fingers under the towel. She
didn't move them all the way to my ass, merely tickled the skin just
underneath the cotton. I kept hold of her face, and continued to stroke
her thigh. Our kiss began to slow, but I didn't want it to be over so soon.
I wanted to make out like a teenager, kissing for hours on the couch. I
wanted to discover what Bella Swan liked, what turned her on and what
made her come.

"Edward?" she whispered against my swollen lips.

I stroked my palm down her neck and rested it on the top of her chest. I
hummed, waiting for her to elaborate.

"What the hell was that?" she questioned breathlessly.

Her eyes were studying mine, assessing my reaction. I kept my lips
close to hers, not wanting to separate just yet. It would break the spell,

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and we would have to return to our odd little friendship.

"Do you really need me to explain it to you?"

"I just...it was...intense?"

I was slightly confused by the tone of her voice.

"Have you never kissed anyone like that before? With that kind of need,
Bella? That's how it feels. Intense."

I pulled back and dropped her leg begrudgingly, at the same time she
removed her fingers from the towel.

The spell was broken.

"I've had intense, before. Of course I have, but that was something..."

"More?" I interrupted. "Yes, it was. I think everything about us will be
more."

Her brow furrowed, clearly confused by my words.

"I don't understand you. Us?"

"Christ, Bella, you can't be that blind." I waved a hand between our
heated bodies. "This is us. You can't deny this. It's real, and yes, it's
damn intense, but please don't tell me you can't feel it."

I waited anxiously, knowing that if she did deny it I wouldn't believe her
anyway. The way her body responded to mine told me all I needed to
know.

"I'm not denying there's something there, but I don't understand what, or
how," she mumbled.

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"Do you need to?" I shot back.

She struggled for words, as I watched her start to say something, but
then close her mouth almost immediately. This really was new to her,
and I couldn't help the joy I felt from that. Tyler hadn't made her feel like
this. This was ours.

"I didn't come here for this. I came here to find who I am."

"And do you think you can't do that while discovering who we are?"

I cupped the back of her neck with my hand and brought my lips down
to hers. It was a small chaste kiss, but I had to show her this current
only ran between us.

"You came here for a new life. Did you ever consider that I was a part of
that?"

Bella sighed and rolled her eyes.

"No, I didn't. Edward, I didn't know you were living here, so how could I
possibly include you in my dreams?"

She pushed me away from her body. She needed space. The problem
was I was still incredibly aroused, and my erection was making itself
known through the gap in my towel.

"Jesus!" she shouted. "Put it away."

"You weren't saying that before when you were staring right at me."

I smirked, trying to stop an argument before one erupted. Baby steps
were needed with Bella. I'd known that from the start, but sometimes I
got too carried away with the moment to think about the speed we were
going. She needed to be romanced.

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She turned her back on me and was about to leave the room, mumbling
about dinner being ready. I placed my hand on her arm, trying to stop
her.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I came on a bit strong. I guess I'm going about this all
wrong."

She turned slightly, tucking her hair behind her ear, and waited.

"Emm asked me if you'd like to come with me to his house. Rose wants
to cook dinner for us tomorrow. Garrett will be there too, I assume.
She's desperate to meet you."

My body buzzed with anticipation, as I waited for her response.

"I'll think about it and let you know in a little while," she whispered
before leaving the room.

I could hear her footfall on the stairs as she descended.

All I could do was hope I hadn't fucked up.

Dinner was stilted, neither one of us knowing what to say to the other.
She'd gone back to blushing whenever I looked at her. I adored it, but
wanted it to be for an entirely different matter, not from embarrassment.

I washed the dishes and she turned on the new TV. I watched her
randomly flick through the channels, trying to find something to watch. I
brought her a glass of wine and sat next to her on the couch.

"Thanks, that's thoughtful," she smiled.

"No, I'm just trying to get you drunk," I laughed, hoping she wouldn't
take me too seriously, though I had considered it. An inebriated Bella
could be extremely interesting.

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She ignored my comment and took a sip, before handing me the
remote.

"I can't find a thing on. You take a look, maybe you can."

I started to scroll through the channels. It didn't escape my notice just
how comfortable this was. We were like a couple spending the night
together. She curled her legs onto the couch, which meant she leaned
in closer to me. I resisted the urge to wrap her in my arms, and instead
concentrated on the screen. It wasn't easy. I could smell her, feel her
body heat beckoning towards me, and hear her little moans when I
turned on something she didn't like.

"We could always talk instead of watching this, you know?" I suggested.

Bella eyed me warily, and shifted in her seat.

"What do you want to talk about? I'm not in the mood for a deep
discussion about us again."

"I wouldn't exactly call what happened upstairs a deep discussion," I
snorted.

"I didn't mean the part where I caught you with your hand on your dick,"
she snarled.

"Neither was I. I was talking about when I was kissing you, and touching
your thigh. When I had you pinned against the wall and you were
nuzzling my neck. That was no conversation, BB."

"Edward, don't."

"Why? I think it's pretty clear I find you attractive. I'm drawn to you, and I
know you feel it too, so don't even try to deny it. We're adults. Where's
the problem with having a little fun?"

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"There isn't one really," she said softly. "I'm confused by the things I feel
around you. You're so sure of yourself. So happy with who you've
become, and yet here I am, just starting out again after making a huge
mistake and pinning all my hopes on a gay man. I don't know who I am
anymore."

"So let me help you find it," I whispered.

I turned to cup her face in my hands, smiling when she didn't put up a
fight.

"Your body doesn't fight me, so why does your head? All I'm asking is
that you allow us to have some fun, get to know each other again. You
never know what you might find when you go looking for seashells."

She giggled and pushed playfully at my chest.

"Stop with the beach analogies. You sound like Aro."

I stoked her cheek with the pad of my thumb and nodded.

"I guess I do. I catch myself sometimes. He played a huge part in my
life. I suppose some of him rubbed off on me."

"You loved him," she stated.

"Yes, I did. He did for me what others wouldn't, and he didn't ask for
anything in return. Except one."

Bella moved her head from my hands and shocked me by moving
closer to my side. I wrapped my arm around her shoulder, as she
cuddled into my chest. We sat silently for a while, both uncertain of our
next move. A film had started on the TV, and I could have laughed at
the scene before us.

A couple kissing in the rain.

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Bella shifted a little, and I knew she was remembering our kiss. It was
something neither of us would forget.

"I'll come with you tomorrow night, to Emmett's. Thank you for asking
me."

"Good. Rose would love having someone to talk babies to. Their house
is just through the woods. We could walk, if you didn't mind?"

"That'd be nice."

She adjusted her head on my chest and went back to watching the film.
I stared at the screen but took nothing in. I was simply enjoying this
moment with Bella. It was just as I'd hoped.

I thought she'd drifted off to sleep when she uttered quietly.

"What was the one thing?"

"Huh?" I asked confused.

"The one thing Aro asked of you before he died?"

"Oh! He asked me to take care of you, BB. I promised, and its one I
plan on keeping."

I waited for a shocked response, but she said nothing. She didn't need
to, because she tugged my t-shirt, pulling me towards her, and kissed
my lips tenderly.

It was the only reply I would ever need.

I would help her find who she was, and in doing so she would find me.

awww, bless his naked little ass!

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Still liking? Do you want a teaser of chp8?

Press that button... go on...

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8. Chapter 8: Trees

Thank you to everyone who's reading/reviewing/alerting and
pimping. There are way too many to mention you all individually,

but know that I'm seriously grateful!

Thanks you to my awesome beta team of Maylin & Twirlgrrl. Also
love to hunterhunting for prereading.

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward is still definitely mine!

BPOV

"So, there was Eddie, sitting in a puddle of mud, crying because he'd
lost his backpack," Emmett boomed.

I giggled and chanced a look at Edward. He was shaking his head and
smiling in embarrassment.

"What did you do?" I asked, placing my hand on Edward's arm to stop
him covering his face.

"Nothing! I started to walk over, but he had a tantrum and stomped
home to Aro. It was hilarious!"

Dinner at the McCarty's was not what I'd expected. They were so
welcoming and sweet you couldn't help but feel at home here. I'd been
nervous when picking out what to wear. I didn't know how formal I
needed to be. Edward had invariably laughed at my question, but never
answered me. I'd eventually chosen a black halter dress with simple
ballet flats. We were walking to their house, and I wasn't going to break
my neck by wearing heels.

8. Chapter 8: Trees

I'd curled my hair loosely around my shoulders, and slicked on a little lip
gloss. I'd been more than a little irritated when I'd seen Edward's
ensemble. Tatty jeans with a huge hole in the knee, and a worn navy
polo shirt. It had been too late to change by then, and I'd wanted to
make a good impression on Rosalie anyway. I didn't know anyone here
in La Push, and it would be nice to have a friend to talk to. Even though
I hadn't met her, if she was married to Emmett I knew she had to be
nice. He was adorable.

I missed girly chats. Those were now limited to short phone calls with
Angela. She was forever telling me how crazy she thought I was for
doing this. Angela had been one of the only people I'd told about Tyler.
The real reason I'd divorced him. Everyone else assumed we'd just
drifted apart. The night I'd told her, she'd brought me two bottles of
tequila and a carton of Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garcia to drown my
sorrows in.

I missed her.

I needed to talk to someone about Edward, but then I wouldn't really
know where to start. I blushed every time I thought of my brazen
behavior in the bathroom. I'd been grinding on him wantonly. Even the
moments before when he'd simply nuzzled my neck had made me thirst
for more. I'd felt his desire for me, as it pressed eagerly into my
stomach. Not that he could've denied it anyway. His gentle touches and
stolen glances couldn't be misconstrued as anything else. Added to
that, his innuendos and comments, and I knew Edward Masen found
me attractive enough to flirt with.

I was terribly confused. This intensity was alien to me. Tyler and I had
been comfortable companions, and there wasn't the ferocity that
seemed to burn between me and Edward. I simply had no idea what to
do about it, hence the reason I really needed a friend.

"Bella?" Edward whispered, snapping me from my daydream.

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I blinked quickly, trying to get my bearings.

"Are you feeling alright? You've gone very pale."

He placed his hand on my knee and stroked his fingers across the skin,
leaving goose bumps in their wake. I turned to look at him, but got
instantly lost in the rich green abyss of his eyes. Why was I fighting
this? Why didn't I just throw caution to the wind and have a little fun?

Tyler...

"Hmm," I mumbled. "Sorry, I zoned out a little."

I glanced around the table, realizing we were alone.

"Where did everybody go?" I asked bewildered.

Edward chuckled and raised his hand, stroking my cheek with the back
of his fingers. I had to fight from closing my eyes and luxuriating in his
touch. He was driving me insane with his displays of affection.

"Emmett's on the phone, talking to Jasper about a new contract.
Garrett's playing Wii in the living room, and Rose went to get more
wine. That leaves you. And me."

He whispered the last line so huskily, my abdomen tightened. My body
was buckling under the strain, only my mind was staying strong, and
reminding me of the hurt.

"Bella, you're worrying me. Do we need to go home?" He asked
concerned.

I exhaled deeply and replied.

"I'm sorry. I'm fine, really. I was just thinking, and obviously drifted away
for a moment."

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Edward's fingers continued to caress my cheek, and we stared at each
other, making the rest of the room disappear...until someone cleared
their throat. We both blinked startled by the noise.

"Bella?" Rose said softly. "Would like to help me with dessert in the
kitchen?"

I pushed my chair back and stood. Edward slid his hand from my cheek
along my neck, and down my arm, tickling my fingers before I walked
towards Rosalie. My arm tingled from his touch. In fact, he left my whole
body vibrating for more. I knew as time passed this need would only
build, increasing to a crescendo. I was just anxious as to what that
crescendo would be.

"Are you really feeling OK?" Rose questioned as she rubbed her slightly
swollen belly.

I sighed. I wasn't sure how much to tell her. I didn't know how close she
was to Edward. Would she run back and tell him what was going on in
my head?

As if reading my thoughts she moved and closed the door slightly,
before stating, "I can be very discreet. I can see you need someone to
talk to, hun."

"I don't know," I groaned. "Things are just rather confusing at the
moment. I'm at a loss for what to do next."

"About Edward?" she enquired.

"Yeah, is it that obvious?"

Rose snorted as she retrieved a carton of ice cream from the freezer,
setting it on the counter.

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"Obvious? Maybe not to a blind man, but to the rest of us? Yeah. Do
you want to tell me about it?"

"I don't know what to say. None of this is what I expected when I came
here, and now I seem to be lost in this whirlwind of feelings and at the
center of it all is Edward, naked in the rain and asking me to dance! I
don't understand any of it. I mean, he seems to know me, what I like,
what I need, what I want. How does he do that? I get flustered around
him, but he likes that and teases me more. Like in the bathroom with the
towel and the grinding. I just don't know what to do!" I spewed out.

Rosalie's blue eyes widened. I slapped my hand across my mouth,
mortified at my verbal vomit. I wanted to cry. She saw my distress and
came towards me, placing her arm around my shoulder.

"I'm sorry," I whimpered. "I really didn't mean for all that to come out."

"Hey, not to worry. You clearly needed it to, but could you elaborate?
Because right now, you really don't want to know the images that are
flitting through my brain."

She pulled out a stool for me and I told her everything, from the first
day, right through to last night with the cuddling on the couch. I watched
a multitude of emotions play across her face, and at times wanted to
stop, because she seemed so shocked with it all.

"Wow, a lot's happened then?" She said breathlessly, still stunned by
my outburst.

"I'm so sorry to dump on you. I shouldn't have. You're his friend and it
puts you in an awkward position."

Rose rubbed my shoulder soothingly.

"Not really. It's actually good to have another female to talk to. I usually
get conversations about drywall or World of Warcraft, neither of which is

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what a girl needs on a regular basis. Anyway, that's changing the
subject. I want to know why you think this thing with Edward is wrong."

I wanted to tell her; to confide in someone, but not here. Not with the
man in question sitting on the other side of the wall, waiting for me.

"I'm just scared. This is all so fast, and he's very intense."

"Edward?" Rose giggled. "You're kidding, right?"

I shook my head at her, and was met by another minute of snickering.

"He is!" I defended.

"Oh, Bella. Edward Masen is the most laidback guy I know. Intense
would be the last word I'd use to describe him. I think you need to
question why you feel that, because I can make a pretty good guess."

She walked back to the counter and began scooping the ice cream into
bowls.

I watched her completely clueless as to how she could find Edward
laidback. Just because he was comfortable walking around without
clothes didn't make him any less consuming. I wondered how anyone
managed to deal with him on a permanent basis.

"Has he had many girlfriends?" I blurted out.

My filter was clearly busted around Rose.

"No," she replied, shaking her head. "There have been a couple, but he
never seems that into them, and pretty soon they get bored and stop
calling him. He's a charmer in the clubs, and certainly has no problem
getting some when he wants it. He always gives off the 'taken' vibe, like
he's waiting for someone."

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"Oh! Do you know who?" I asked in surprise.

"I don't even know if there is a who. It's really just a feeling I have. I've
seen him with girls, and most of them are really into him. Edward
always seems to be thinking of something, or someone else. Look, I
know you don't want to talk about it all now, so why don't you come over
on Friday? Garrett will be at school and Emm will be working on your
place. We'll be alone."

I considered saying no, but immediately beat myself up about it. I did
need someone to talk to. I needed a friend and Rose seemed to want to
be that person. She hadn't laughed at anything I'd said about Edward,
nor had she tried to hide anything from me. There was no reason to
deny her request, so I nodded and replied, "I'd like that, Rose. Thank
you."

I felt better knowing I had someone to talk to. In reality, I knew there
was nothing wrong with being attracted to Edward, but I'd been hurt by
Tyler. I no longer trusted my judgement, or my feelings.

"Edward's one of the good ones, Bella," she said, flicking her blond hair
over her shoulder. "You'd do well to remember that."

I watched her rub her pregnant stomach again. I was startled to feel
slightly envious. It wasn't something I'd considered wanting at this point
in my life, but that didn't stop the jealousy.

"You and Emmett have been together a while, huh?"

She smiled wistfully, before replying softly, "Emmett is my Prince
Charming. The man's damn perfect. People said we'd never make it,
especially after I gave birth to Garrett, but we're here and stronger than
ever."

I stepped from the stool and walked over to help her with dessert. I
pulled a knife from the block and began to cut the apple pie.

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"So you've known Edward as long as you've known Emmett has then?"
I enquired nonchalantly.

Rose nodded, but didn't elaborate any further. I had so many questions
about him, but didn't want to appear too nosey. I'd only just met her and
as welcoming as she was, I didn't want her to feel torn.

We placed the pie into the bowls with the ice cream and chatted about
her son. Garrett had his first girlfriend, and Rose was telling me how
cute they were together. When she told me that he'd met Kate on the
beach, I snorted, receiving an odd look from her.

"Sorry, it's just that Edward and I met on the beach. I was seven, and he
ruined my castle," I pouted.

Rose nodded her head knowingly, and smirked.

"What?"

She didn't get a chance to respond, because the door opened and a
bronze mess of hair poked through the gap.

"Need any help, or do you ladies like being alone?" Edward grinned,
wiggling his brows suggestively.

"You wish!" Rose shot back, throwing a towel in his direction.

"That I do," he agreed, stepping into the kitchen. "But I really hate the
idea of sharing BB, with anyone. Even if it is sexy girl-on-girl action in
the kitchen, complete with ice cream."

He stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I was
shocked he was doing it in front of Rose, and by the size of her eyes, so
was she. He rested his chin on my shoulder and breathed gently into
my ear. I shivered.

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"Making friends with Rose?" he asked.

His words vibrated through my body, making my nipples hard. My body
had no problem showing me what it wanted. My brain just needed to
catch up.

"She's nice. I'm coming over on Friday for coffee and a chat."

He turned his head and ran his nose slowly up my neck. I swayed into
his touch, and closed my eyes, completely absorbed in his actions. The
kitchen and Rosalie faded, as everything always seemed to when
Edward was this close to me.

"Are you going to talk about me?" he muttered.

"That's a pretty big ego, you have, Edward," I retorted, but realized
almost immediately what I'd opened myself up to.

He pulled my ass closer to his crotch.

"It's big, but it isn't my ego, BB," he crooned.

"Oh seriously, Edward!" Rose laughed. "Try something original on the
girl."

I felt heat crawling up my neck as I opened my eyes, realizing how
centered on Edward I'd been. I was focused on the feel of his body
wrapped around mine, and had lost all conscious thought of where I
was. Embarrassment pulsed through me, but Edward was joking with
Rosalie and acting as if nothing was wrong with what we'd done. That
thought made me blush further, because we hadn't really done anything
apart from cuddle. There was nothing wrong in that.

Edward and Rosalie were laughing and he let go of me to swat her with
the towel. I felt lost without his heat, and wrapped my arms around my
waist. They were like siblings the way they were teasing and mocking

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each other. I couldn't stop the smile spreading across my face.

"Are you beating my wife, Eddie? You know I'll have to hurt you if you
bruise my princess."

I turned to see Emmett grinning in the doorway. He barely
acknowledged us before walking to Rose. He placed a hand flat over
her bump and pulled her into a passionate kiss. I averted my eyes, but
the traitorous things landed on Edward. He was gazing back at me, as
he licked his lips. I could get lost in those eyes, and never need to be
found. My skin prickled with awareness, as he sauntered across the
kitchen and back to me.

He stroked my bare forearm, and whispered, "Do you want to leave?"

My brows furrowed, confused as to why he was asking. That was until I
looked over at Emmett and Rosalie. They were making out like
teenagers against the counter. Edward coughed loudly trying to gain
their attention, but all we received was a wave from Emmett, as he
continued to attack his wife.

"They never could keep their hands off each other," Edward groaned,
rolling his eyes.

"Where's Garrett?"

He grabbed his hooded top and opened the front door, yelling goodbye.

"He went upstairs to talk to Kate on his cell. He's used to those two
making out. It's an everyday occurrence here."

He grinned affectionately as he spoke about his friends. He loved them,
and it was good to know he hadn't been out here alone after granddad
had died.

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We stepped out into the cold, dark night, and I shivered. I should have
rethought my wardrobe choice, or at least brought a sweater. I wrapped
my arms around myself and rubbed my arms, when Edward stopped
me. He shook out his hoodie and placed it around my shoulders. I was
about the put my arms through, when he caught my wrist and pushed
them gently into the sleeves. His scent surrounded me, sandalwood and
cinnamon. It was divine, and I inhaled it deeply.

"Better?" he asked.

I nodded, as we began to walk again in the direction of the woods. He
snapped a rose from the edge of the McCarty's garden and handed it to
me. I felt a blush stain my cheeks as I thanked him, smelling the sweet
perfume.

"It's so eerie here at night," I whispered, wanting to fill the silence. "I
understand why you do most of your writing at this time."

"Speaking of my writing, I think I'll need your help with something. I had
an idea, but I'm not sure where to go with it. Would you mind?"

"Not at all. Just let me know when you need me," I said casually.

"Always, BB," Edward muttered.

I rolled my eyes, but chose not to comment.

"I'm calling the magazine tomorrow and asking them for an assignment.
There's no point in me taking any longer off. I can slot it in around
getting the house fixed up."

Edward nodded and pulled my hand to his, linking our fingers. Sparks
zipped up my arm from his touch, but I tried to be blasé about it and
swung our joined hands between us.

"What was your idea?" I questioned curiously.

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He chuckled and squeezed my fingers gently.

"Wait and see."

I looked around, noticing we were now in the heart of the woods. It was
a little unnerving, and my pulse quickened.

"Did you talk to Emmett about the barn conversion?"

"Yup," he confirmed. "It's all in hand. He's employed a couple of new
guys, and it'll get going next week."

"Ooo, can I see the plans?" I asked excitedly.

"No. You'll see it when it's done."

I wasn't sure why he was being so secretive, but I knew pushing him
wouldn't help. I hadn't seen him angry yet, nor did I want to.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Absolutely," he agreed, looking down at me.

I shivered as the wind whipped through the trees. It was getting colder
the closer we got to the house; the closer we were to the sea.

"When granddad died, why did you stay in my house? Why didn't you
move?"

He stopped abruptly, and wrapped his arms around my waist, bringing
our bodies together. My arms moved of their own volition and rested on
top of his, my hands gripping his forearms. His eyes were glinting in the
moonlight, giving him a predatory look, as he replied.

"Firstly, it's our house, so why would I need to leave? Secondly, I was
waiting."

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"What were you waiting for?" I asked confused by his words.

"Do you really want to know the answer? Are you ready to hear what I
have to say?"

He whispered the words so seductively that I felt them float across my
skin. My heartbeat increased. I was anxious for his response, and
began to chew my lower lip. I nodded, eliciting a small smile from him.

I gulped as he backed me into the nearest tree. I was about to ask why,
when he slid his hands up my neck and cupped my face, his fingers
tickling the hair at the nape of my neck.

"Are you sure?" he questioned.

"Yes," I breathed.

His lips touched mine, but only momentarily, before he pulled away
slightly and looked into my eyes.

"You," he uttered. "I was waiting for you."

I gasped, but didn't have a moment to absorb his declaration, before he
kissed me again. This time it was ferocious and needy. The rose
dropped to the ground.

Forgotten.

He pulled my head closer to his, and tilted it, allowing his mouth to
connect fully with mine. It was aggressive, and rough, but it was
arousing me more than any other kiss I'd ever experienced. I wanted
more.

I wanted Edward.

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I was the one to tentatively explore his mouth with my tongue. I slid it
against his, feeling the rumble of appreciation as it rolled up from his
chest, through his mouth and into mine. The noise coursed directly to
my nipples, making them taut, demanding to be touched. I was being
carried away on a wave of arousal, not really paying attention to what
he'd said. The words played on my periphery, though. He'd waited for
me. He'd stayed at the house, waiting for me to return.

Why would he do that when he didn't really know me?

I knew I should stop and ask him those questions, but his lips felt so
good moving across mine. His hands felt so right, as they unzipped the
hooded top and slipped inside to hold my torso, and his knee felt perfect
where it began pushing between my thighs. I adjusted my stance,
allowing him to settle it between them. He growled and moved his
mouth to my neck, devouring the flesh. His teeth nipped at the thin skin,
making me purr and push my chest towards him. My body was offering
itself to Edward, demanding to be caressed, touched and pinched until it
exploded.

When did I become so reckless?

His knee rocked against my sex, moving the cotton of my panties until it
gathered between my folds. The cotton pressed against my clit, making
my thighs quiver. At the same time Edward, swirled his tongue down my
neck, licking slow little circles with his saliva. He'd then blow across it,
causing goose bumps to break out across my skin. My breasts ached
with need.

I pushed my fingers roughly into his hair and tugged.

"Fuck!" he snarled from between my breasts.

I smirked and did it again. It was usually me that came undone when he
was too close, but I was thrilled he was as lost as me. His nose moved
the material covering my tit, and he licked his way to the nipple. I

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squealed, as he lapped at it, and gripped his hair tighter.

I realized I was riding his thigh again, just like in the bathroom. I was a
completely different person with Edward. My need was always
simmering away waiting for his touch. I just didn't understand it.

"Don't ever wear a bra again," he demanded.

"Huh huh," I mumbled.

His hand moved to cup my breast, easing the nipple into his mouth. I
groaned, as his teeth teased the hardened peak. I wanted more.

I always wanted more.

My body needed more.

He was more.

My hand trailed down his back on a quest of its own. I circled the edge
of his jeans with my fingers, and was incited by his moan. They tickled
their way to the front of his jeans, and he gasped as I popped the first
button. My fingers caressed the coarse hairs that started a path towards
his erection.

I popped the second button and knew I was precariously close to the
head of his erection. The tips of my fingers itched. I wanted to push my
hand further into his jeans, but he wrapped his hand around my wrist,
stopping me.

"You're playing with fire, BB," he growled. "Don't touch unless you mean
it."

I wiggled my fingers, still wanting it, but the look in his eyes cautioned
me. I lifted my head and blinked, trying to get my bearings. I could hear
our heavy breathing as it floated around us. My pulse drummed against

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my wrists, and I swallowed hard.

Edward looked at me seductively, a small smirk teasing the right side of
his swollen lips. His thigh was still rocking against me, teasing me and
keeping me turned on. I licked my lips, noticing that my hand was still in
his hair, and one still inches away from his crotch.

Edward raised his brows the second he saw where my eyes had delved
to.

"Only if you mean it," he repeated.

"I don't...I'm...I," I stuttered, not really sure what I was trying to get out.

He sighed heavily and stepped away. I felt bereft without his heat,
without him.

"Then you're not ready."

He bent to retrieve the rose from the ground and handed it back to me. I
stared at him in amazement, as he rearranged my dress and zipped the
hoodie back up.

"I don't understand, Edward," I whimpered. "What did I do wrong?"

"Oh, BB. You've done nothing wrong, but I'm an all or nothing kinda
guy. I don't want a quick fumble in the woods with you, though it would
be fucking amazing. I know you'd regret it in the morning, and rejection
from you is something I'm not willing to deal with. I want it all, and I want
you begging for it. I want you waking up next to me still desperate for
more. I've waited this long, and even though its torture now I've tasted
you, I'm willing to wait a little longer."

I gulped audibly, as he took my hand and led us back towards the
house. My body was still on alert, still focused on his. It buzzed with an
intensity I'd never experienced. The problem was, I was beginning to

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realize I would only ever feel it with the man beside me, but his 'all or
nothing' statement scared me.

Could I really throw caution to the wind and just have fun with him?

Could I forget about Tyler, his preference for men, and the hurt I still
felt?

I reminded myself why I'd come here, and knew it was to forget those
things. I now had to decide how much involvement Edward was going to
have in that.

He'd placed his marker in the sand. I needed to decide what I wanted,
and go and retrieve it.

I know - cockblocked again, but Bella's scared, so she isn't going
to jump his bones just yet!

Link to the outfit on my profile.

Review = Teaser...

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9. Chapter 9: Bound

Thanks to everyone reading, reviewing and pimping. You're all
awesome.

Thanks for all the birthday wishes too!

Love to my two amazing betas. Maylin & Twirlgrrl - I heart you both
terribly.

Thanks to hunterhunting for prereading and pimping. Mwah xx

SM owns all things Twilight. Erectionward is still mine.

BPOV

Why did I agree to do this?

I'd been stupid and I hadn't even been drunk at the time, not unless you
count being drunk on Edward. I knew that was possible because the
man was intoxicating. Each time he was near me I felt my head spin. I
convinced myself it wasn't lust, but deep down I knew I was a liar. I just
wondered how long it would be before one of us snapped.

Edward kept telling me he wouldn't allow anything to happen until I was
ready, but ready for what? For him? Because I don't think any woman
could be ready for his brand of intensity. After Edward's revelations the
other night though, I knew he wasn't interested in other women.

Edward Masen wanted me.

It still blew my mind. The naked man I'd found in my house had been
waiting for me. He wanted me, and right now I was in the dark, on my
knees and blindfolded, simply because he'd asked. He'd had an idea for
his latest book, but he wanted some feedback from me. At the time I

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agreed, I hadn't realized that would include my current predicament,
and when he told me what he wanted I'd thought he was joking.

He clearly wasn't.

Edward wanted to know how I felt knowing that someone was watching
me. He wanted me to feel like the character in his book. I would be
blindfolded, but she would also be bound. I'd balked at that, and he
chuckled, adding a smartass comment about teaching me the joys of
being tied up. He teased me in the most seductive of ways, and I could
tell he knew exactly what he was doing. My pussy twitched with want,
as images of being tied up and seduced by Edward Masen flitted
through my head. I'd squeezed my thighs together, hoping to ease the
ache. It had only made matters worse.

He'd eventually talked me around, telling me the basic outline of his
plot. To really be able to help him with the feelings, I needed to be like
the woman in his book. She was bound and blindfolded, scared by what
was watching her. I needed to feel the same way. I wanted to help him,
so had begrudgingly agreed. I worried about what he was going to use,
but breathed a sigh of relief when he had shown me the satin tie from a
robe. He slipped it gently around my wrist; caressing the inside and
making me bite back a moan.

I was still stunned I was doing as he asked, but it was too late now. I
was already on my knees in the garden, with a blindfold in place, and
my heart beginning to race. I could hear the wind in the trees and the
sea on the other side of the fence. I could even hear Newton in the
woods, but I'd yet to sense Edward.

I'd already figured out that he was going to try and scare me. That way
he'd get a true reaction for the character. I was preparing myself. I didn't
want to look like a complete baby, but I'd lost all track of time. It felt like
I'd been out here for hours and it was getting cold. This was such a
stupid idea, and even though I knew there was nothing stopping me
from leaving, I stayed.

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I waited.

I felt it before I heard anything. It was a tingling starting at my finger tips.
It travelled up my arms, across my shoulder and zipped down my spine.
I was tempted to peek under the material covering my eyes, but didn't
want him to get angry, so I remained still, as my heartbeat pounded
heavily in my chest. I tried to stay calm and listen to everything, but it
was difficult, because my breathing was becoming erratic.

"Bellllllaaaa," came his silky voice.

I shivered as it floated across my skin; the hairs on the back of my neck
prickling in a strange excitement. I stayed silent, unsure of whether he
expected a response. My head whipped to the right when a twig
cracked, and I swallowed the fear that was beginning to rise like bile up
my throat. I knew it was Edward, but it didn't stop my head from forming
twisted little scenarios. What if it wasn't him?

I began to shudder, as the tingling across my flesh intensified.

"Bellllaaaa," he crooned again.

His voice was closer this time. It was coming from just over my
shoulder, and I turned.

"No! Stay exactly as you are," he demanded aggressively.

My breasts began to ache with need. I was scared, but it was oddly
arousing knowing it was Edward out there. Knowing he was watching
me, and was going to touch me. At least I hoped he was going to,
because I couldn't deny the attraction any longer.

I tried to regulate my breathing, hoping I'd then be able hear exactly
where he was, but I was panting and it was drowning everything else
out. The more I tried to concentrate on it, the more I panted, because I
simply wasn't focusing on Edward's presence.

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I squealed loudly when I felt a feather light touch on my right shoulder.
A small chuckle came from the same direction, and I knew he was
extremely close. He would be able to see my chest heaving, and hear
my little gasps. I was chastising myself for agreeing to this, but then
couldn't stop the arousal pooling low in my belly. What did he intend on
doing to me?

I froze as his finger trailed absently along my exposed arm, and I could
feel goose bumps appear in his wake.

"Are you scared?" he whispered against my ear.

His breath fanned across my shoulder and neck, making me gulp. I
nodded, not trusting myself to speak. If I was honest, his intensity
always scared me. I'd never met anyone who went after things quite like
he did. It unnerved me.

"Can you try to remember what you feel? How your body is reacting to
me?"

"Yes," I breathed.

"Good," he stated as he gripped my ponytail.

I hissed a little, as it pulled gently at my scalp, but he didn't seem to
notice. He tugged my head back, exposing my throat, and heaving
chest. It only made me pant more, knowing how erotic the sight must be
for him. His warm breath ghosted my collarbone, making me
hyperaware of exactly how close he was. I thought I felt his lips touch
my flesh, but as soon as I felt it, they disappeared. It didn't stop my
pulse vibrating for attention, though. It wanted Edward's tongue lapping
at the thin skin covering it.

What the hell was wrong with me?

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His fingers worked at the tie holding my hair and released it from its
confines. It cascaded down my back and across my shoulders, and I felt
Edward's fingers combing the strands. A coo slipped from my lips, and
his fingers halted midway through.

"Bella, do you trust me," he uttered quietly.

I swallowed. I did trust him, but why was he asking now? What did he
want me to do? Was this not enough?

"It's a simple yes or no answer, and I'd like to know which," he
demanded harsher than before.

My panties became wet at the dominant tone to his voice, and I shifted
uncomfortably, wiggling my butt. His fingers tightened in my hair at the
same time I heard a low growl emanate from his chest.

"Why won't you answer me?"

I opened my eyes, but was met by the dark blindfold. I longed to look
into his dark green depths. I adored his eyes, and needed confirmation
that he was merely playing a game right now. He was just using me for
research, wasn't he?

As if reading my thoughts, he repeated that I should remember what I
was feeling, and how my body was reacting.

"Yes, I trust you," I mumbled, hearing the slight quiver to my voice.

"Thank you," he stated.

He let go of my hair, and I lifted my head back up. The heat from his
body caressed my back, as his hands slipped over my shoulders,
massaging the tension from them.

"Am I scaring you?"

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I bit my lip and shook my head. I didn't know why I was staying so quiet
during this, but it felt like I should. It was as though that was my role.
The one of the scared captive.

Edward's fingers moved slowly down my chest, slipping under the
cotton of my tank. I held my breath, as his mouth came into contact with
my ear.

"I thought I said you were never to wear a bra again, Bella."

My mouth instantly dried. The words turned me on, but he was joking
now, wasn't he? He didn't honestly expect me to walk around here
without one on, and even if he did, who was he to demand that?

"Why won't you answer me?" he snarled.

I whimpered, and he didn't apologize. His thumbs gently caressed my
chest in a silent gesture. I inhaled deeply before responding.

"I'm sorry."

He said nothing further, just moved his fingers closer to my nipples and
grazed them softly. I gasped in surprise, but mentally prayed for more.
My prayers were answered when he rolled my nipples between his
fingers, before massaging my breasts tenderly.

I moaned when he removed them completely, and I could no longer
sense where he was. I felt cold and exposed without his heat. This was
quickly spiralling from a game into something else; something that had
nothing to do with his book, or research. I knew he had a slightly
aggressive edge when it came to sexual attraction. His first kiss with me
had included hair pulling, but I was frightened by what this was turning
into. I was also scared by how much my body wanted this aggression.
Tyler had been soft and careful. Edward was demanding and harsh, but
the voice in my head was still telling me to stop denying myself, and to
go with it.

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My panties were becoming uncomfortable and my sex was throbbing. I
shuffled position, because my legs were aching from kneeling for so
long, and my arms were stiff.

"Are you hurting?" he asked.

The concern in his voice was thick and couldn't be ignored.

"I'm OK, just stiff," I whispered and immediately felt his hands wrap
around my biceps. He pulled me up, and my legs wobbled.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "Stand for a while."

I steadied myself, as his hands cupped my cheeks. It still panicked me
that he could see every minute reaction I had to him, but I could see
none of his. He would see what was arousing me, and, knowing
Edward, he would do it all the more.

His hands moved from my face, and stroked down my neck and across
my shoulders. His fingers pushed the spaghetti straps of my tank and
bra away from my chest, and down my biceps. An instant later his lips
were pecking their way along my collar bone. I gasped at the contact.
This was not what I was expecting when he asked for help, but I
couldn't tell him to stop. I didn't want him to.

Edwards's hands held my hips as he brought me closer to his mouth. I
wanted to run my hands through his hair; to pull him against me, but my
wrists were still bound.

I whimpered when his tongue dipped below the cup of my bra,
skimming my taut peak. He murmured against my breast, but I couldn't
distinguish what he'd said, because the thundering of my heart was all I
could hear.

This was spiralling out of control.

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"Answer me!" he demanded harshly.

I was bewildered because I hadn't heard a single word he'd said.

"I...I didn't...I'm sorry," I gasped.

I felt his head move from near my chest.

"Are you going to answer the question?" he asked sharply.

"I didn't hear you."

I swallowed; his tone was scaring me now. He seemed angry rather
than dominant. This wasn't what I'd agreed to. He must have heard the
fear in my voice, because he groaned and slowly pushed the blindfold
up with his thumbs. I blinked, as my eyes tried to focus, and my
heartbeat only began to slow when they rested on Edward's green
ones.

He was scowling. His brow furrowed and his lips pursed. I pressed my
hand to his chest, laying my palm flat. I could feel the speed of his
heart, and realized I hadn't been the only one affected by the game
we'd just played.

"I asked if I was upsetting you. Christ, I'm sorry."

"You don't need to be sorry. I volunteered. Remember?"

He shook his head and removed the blindfold completely from around
my head, throwing it on the ground.

"You didn't volunteer. I coerced you into it, and you had no idea what I
was going to ask." He stepped closer to my body and pushed his
fingers into my hair, holding the back of my head. I was still bound at
the wrists, and lust was still coursing through my system. "You looked
so beautiful sitting there. So vulnerable."

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I shivered at his words, as his thumbs stoked the back of my neck.

"I'm cold, Edward. Can we go back inside?"

"Soon, just give me a moment, OK?"

I nodded apprehensively.

"I want to try something. Hold very still," he uttered, as he brought his
lips to mine.

It wasn't hungry like it had been before. It was slow and seductive. His
mouth moved gently over mine, at the same time his tongue darted in,
sliding against my own. I purred with pleasure against his lips, and he
moaned back. His fingers combed my hair, or stroked my neck
seductively, causing little murmurs to escape my lips.

By the time he pulled away I was a puddle of aroused goo. I looked at
him, still dazed from the kiss. It was getting easier to accept them from
him now, though I was beginning to thirst for so much more. He was
addictive.

"That was my apology. Was it enough, or do you need more?" he
smirked.

I melted again. He was such a wiseass. He knew I wanted more, and he
was trying to make me verbalize it. I opened my mouth, but couldn't
form the words. I was scared of letting someone get that close, and
have that kind of power over me again. So I turned and walked back to
the house. My legs still shook, but I don't think it was from kneeling
down. That was the kind of reaction I had to Edward.

It confused the hell out of me.

"BB! Wait!"

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I wrapped my arms around myself and continued to walk into the house,
slamming the screen door behind me. I hadn't even reached the kitchen
before he was turning me around and pressing me up against the
counter.

I glared at him, but he stared back at me, neither one of us willing to
give. Eventually I broke first.

"What the hell was that?" I snarled.

"Erm, it was a kiss. Was that not clear? Damn, come here, I'll do it
again."

He pushed his fingers into the back pockets of my jeans and tugged me
forward, gripping my ass. I pushed at his chest, trying to give me some
space.

"Edward, no! Don't!"

He immediately stopped, but his hands still remained in my pockets.
Our bodies were still in contact, and I couldn't think straight with him so
close. I pushed at his chest again, until he removed his hands and
stepped away. He walked over to the sink and leaned against it,
crossing his arms across his chest. I couldn't stop my eyes from drifting
to his biceps, his forearms and wrists.

Why the hell was I drooling at his wrists?

"What did I do wrong?" he asked sullenly.

It reminded me of the time he took the last red gummy bear. I'd been so
upset with him. I'd stormed off the beach and back to granddads.
Edward had followed me silently all the way home, and sat on the step
for three hours, waiting for me to stop whining. Those had been the
exact same words he'd said to me when I'd walked out of the door that
day. I felt like a moody child.

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"Don't pout, Edward. It doesn't suit you."

"I'm not pouting," he retorted. "I'm just clueless as to why you're upset. I
know I scared you, and I apologized, so I'm at a loss."

"You made a joke out of your apology. It was as though you didn't mean
it. Fucking hell, Edward, I was helping you and you frightened me!" I
stated, raising my voice.

He ran his hands through his already dishevelled hair, and gazed at me
through the tops of his eyes.

"I apologized, Bella."

I ground my teeth, annoyed at his stubbornness.

"Oh, yes you apologized in true Edward Masen style! You made a
fucking joke of it!"

He pushed off the counter and stalked back to me, caging me into the
counter with his arms. His face was directly in front of mine, and I felt
his breath float across my cheeks as he spoke.

"I find your cursing extremely fucking hot, BB, but only when it's in my
bed, and because I'm making you lose the ability to form a coherent
sentence. Other than that can we drop the profanity?"

"See!" I snarled. "You're doing it again! It's always a joke!"

"I wasn't joking. About any of it." His lips were brushing mine as he
spoke, and I closed my eyes. "The kiss was an apology for scaring you.
I would have given you more, if you'd asked, and you can curse all you
like when you're in my bed. I find it extremely sexy."

I sighed, but it barely left my lips before Edward kissed me. It was only a
peck, but it still made my nipples harden. I felt so mixed up, so confused

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and he wasn't allowing me space to gather my thoughts. I pushed him
away and walked towards the living room. I could hear him growling in
the kitchen, as I flopped onto the couch.

I sat waiting for him to reappear, as I tried to clear my head. I was
suffocating in him. Everywhere I turned he was touching me, or kissing
me, and I simply wasn't used to that. I needed air, and space to think. I
needed to gather my thoughts about what I was feeling towards him.

He was scrubbing his face with his hands when he entered the room,
and to my surprise he sat on the chair opposite, not on the couch with
me. He looked at me, his face sullen.

"Look, I don't know how else to say I'm sorry. I know I'm a little intense
with you, but I seriously can't help that. Is there any way we can draw a
line and start again? Please, BB?"

How the hell could I say no, when he called me BB? I'd hated it at first,
but the more he uttered that nickname, the more I liked it. I groaned,
and tried to inject some kind of strength into my voice.

"We can, but could we cool it with the touching and whatever? I don't
need it right now."

Edward nodded and sat back in the chair.

"Do you feel up to answering a few questions about what you felt? I
don't want to push it with you. It's just that it's fresh in your mind and
that's probably when I'll get the best out of you."

He raised his eye brows, waiting for my reaction. I smiled sheepishly
and nodded. If I relayed this I could go to bed not having to worry about
some crazed maniac coming after me.

Edward grabbed a legal pad from the coffee table and a pencil and
began scribbling. I waited until he asked me the first question. I found it

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easier to recall things when I closed my eyes. I told him about the
apprehension that it wasn't him watching me, the tingles I felt, even
though he wasn't near me and the fear at his words. I opened my eyes
after telling him that. He'd looked upset, before mumbling, "Maybe it
wasn't such a good idea."

He was blaming himself, but I'd agreed to it. I didn't need to tell him
about my reaction once he started licking or kissing me, because I think
my body spoke for itself at that time. Edward didn't ask any questions
about that. He merely focused on the blindfold and the fact that my
hands were tied.

I yawned, realizing the time. We'd been talking for two hours, and it was
late. Edward nodded when I stated I was going to bed, bidding me
goodnight, as I climbed the stairs to bed.

Leaving Edward alone on the couch.

I woke panting and screaming for help. Sweat coated my body, and my
sheets were like ropes around my ankles. I tried to catch my breath, as
Edward flung the door to my room open.

He stood in the door way in only a pair of tight boxer shorts. I gulped.

"BB, are you OK?" he asked concerned.

I nodded and tried to calm down. I could feel my pulse fluttering wildly
against my wrist, and a trickle of sweat dripped down my spine. Edward
came closer, climbing onto the bed and up towards me. I eyed him as
he loosened the sheets, allowing me to adjust my position. He wrapped
his arm around my shoulder and brought my head to his chest. I was a
little reluctant, but I really needed some comfort. The dream had really
freaked me out.

"You almost gave me heart failure," he muttered into my hair. "All I
heard was a bloodcurdling scream."

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"Nightmare," I panted.

He stroked my hair and held me tight. It helped soothe my ragged
nerves like nothing else. I closed my eyes and breathed him in. It was
only when I felt something moving under my palm that I realized just
where my hand was.

In his crotch.

That was growing by the millisecond.

Shit!

"Oh God, I'm sorry... I..." I squeaked, trying to move.

Edward wouldn't let me go. He simply moved my hand to his chest and
placed his on top of it. I could feel the steady rhythm of his heart, and I
relaxed. Well, as much as I could relax now that I had the image of
Edward's growing erection burned into my brain.

And hand.

"Do you want to tell me what it was about?" he whispered.

"It was silly," I replied.

I didn't want to upset him, by telling him what it was really about. I'd
been dreaming of being chased through the woods by a madman, who
then held me hostage in the barn. Edward would blame himself, again.

"You can tell me. I promise I won't tease. It didn't look silly by the fear
on your face when I came in."

"Edward, I'm fine."

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I snuggled further into his chest, as he got more comfortable on the
mattress. I should have made him leave. Telling him to stop the touches
and kisses one moment, but lying in bed with him half naked the next
was not a good idea. I just couldn't bring myself to tell him to leave. He
felt good here in my bed and cuddled next to me.

He felt right, and it scared the hell out of me.

The rhythmic stroke of his hand in my hair and the steady thump of his
heart lulled me back to sleep. I vaguely recall him adjusting his position,
so he could lie flat on the mattress, but he didn't jostle me enough to
wake me.

I woke hours later with the feeling of skin under my fingers. I was
caressing muscle, and chest, circling a nipple with my fingertips. I felt a
rumble from where my head rested, and slid my leg further up the body.
My mind was still stuck in a cloud of sleep, and it wasn't really focusing
on what I was doing. It was merely moving from its own desire.

My hand slid further down, gliding across a navel, until it came into
contact with elastic. The rumble came again as long fingers laced with
my own. They pushed our joined hands under the fabric. My palm
tickled, as it skimmed across what I felt like hair. I tried to clear my head
and get a grip on what was happening, but a moan slipped from my lips,
completely distracting me, as a hand cupped my ass.

I shamelessly pushed my hips against the body, and our hands moved
further down. I gasped when I touched velvet hard skin. So soft, yet like
steel. My fingers wrapped around the shaft, covered by the other hand,
eliciting a growl from my pillow. The hand covering mine encouraged
me to pump the shaft and squeeze tighter.

The fog was starting to clear, as a hand massaged my ass, and I
gripped the hardness tighter.

"Ahh..." came a moan from further up the bed.

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The hand left my ass and skimmed up my back, under my cotton tank. It
moved around to my breast, and I sighed as it cupped its weight. I
wanted to shake my head until the haziness cleared, but I was enjoying
the relaxed sensual feeling. It was a delicious blend of touching,
grinding and stroking. The hand linked to mine pulled away, but I kept
my fingers wrapped around the shaft. My tank was removed in my fuzzy
dreamlike state, and I purred at the feel of the hands caressing my
naked flesh. I hadn't had a dream like this in a long time. It was divine.

My nipples were plucked, at the same time I flicked my thumb across
the head of the erection in my hand.

Erection?

Huh?

"Oh, Christ, BB."

I stilled my movements, as the fog cleared, and I realized I was not
dreaming. I was grinding, yet again on Edward Masen. Only this time I
held his cock in my hand and he was fondling my breasts with the most
amazing fingers. He didn't stop his perusal, he continued to tease and
tug my nipples. I could feel my arousal wetting my shorts, and was
almost certain Edward could. My leg was straddling his thigh, there was
no denying it.

I swallowed and slowly removed my hand from his underwear. I winced
and retreated, moving myself to the edge of the bed, and out of
Edwards embrace. I covered my chest, and curled up into a ball.

I felt him turn over, but couldn't look at him. I focused on a single spot
decorating the comforter. Shame washed over me. I wasn't this brazen.
That wasn't in my nature, but with Edward I became someone else,
someone I wasn't entirely comfortable with.

"BB," he whispered.

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"No," I whimpered, flinching away from his touch. "We shouldn't have
done that."

"I beg to differ, but I'll wait."

"Did you know I was still asleep?"

"What?" he asked confused. "Bella I woke up with you touching me, not
the other way around. You initiated it."

"No!" I denied. "Why would I do that?"

He tried to touch me again, sliding the backs of his fingers along my
arm. I wanted to shrug him off, but it felt so comforting.

"I don't know why you'd do it. I just know I woke up to you playing with
me in the nicest possible way. Don't be embarrassed by that. I'm
certainly not complaining," he said softly.

"Don't make some crass joke about this Edward."

I moved from the bed and looked around for my tank top. Shame
washed over me, as I recalled it being removed. His hands had been
cupping my breasts as his thumbs teased my nipples. I felt my cheeks
heat.

"Why did you sleep here anyway? What are you doing in my bed?" I
asked confused.

I finally looked at him. He was lying on his side, his head propped up by
his hand and holding my tank out to me with the other. A single eyebrow
was raised questioningly. He looked awfully comfortable there.

He looked perfect .

"Your nightmare? And I'm not even getting into whose bed this is."

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I was about to ask what on earth he was talking about, but it all came
flooding back, and I snatched my top from his grasp.

"You didn't need to sleep with me!" I snarled, trying to figure out how I
was going to put it back on without giving him a peep show.

He snorted, and showed no signs of moving.

"You don't remember a thing about last night, do you? Bella, you feel
asleep on me. I couldn't have moved even if I'd wanted to. Which I
didn't."

I shook my head, but couldn't really deny it. I needed to get away from
him. I was feeling swamped by him. He consumed my senses and I
couldn't think straight. I turned, mumbling about needing to wash up.

"You talk in your sleep, by the way," he grinned. I glared at him,
desperately wanting to slap his face. He was such a smartass. "It's
utterly fucking adorable."

For lack of anything else to say, I screamed, "FUCK OFF!" at him,
before leaving the room.

I stomped to the bathroom, slamming the door behind me, but not
before I heard him shout playfully, "I told you cursing was hot when it's
in my bed, and because I make you incoherent!"

"ARGH!" I yelled, sliding to the floor, with my back against the door.

What the hell was I supposed to do about him? He was tying me up in
knots.

The problem was, as much as my head fought against the attraction,
my body was ready to lap it up.

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I wanted Edward Masen. I just needed to take that leap, knowing he
would be there to catch me.

O.O ...

Reviews still get teasers...

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10. Chapter 10: Coffee

Thank you all so much for all the love you give Erectionward. He
does appreciate it.

Love to my beta Maylin & pre reader Hunterhunting. Two amazing
ladies.

And smoochies to RedVelvetHeaven, who listens to my inane
banter at odd hours. Thank you xxx

SM owns all things Twilight. I own a lot of knitted gloves.

BPOV

I was embarrassed and was avoiding him. Only a few hours ago I'd had
my hands wrapped around Edward's cock and was unwittingly trying to
make him come. I really had been asleep when it had all started, so I
simply didn't believe him when he said I'd initiated it. I'd hidden in the
bathroom for over an hour. I was petrified of the emotions that were
swamping me. I'd eventually left the room when I'd heard him go
downstairs.

I'd dressed quickly and sneaked out. I was now on my way to see
Rosalie, needing someone to talk to. This was getting out of hand, and I
didn't have any idea how to handle it. He made my skin heat, my
breasts ache and my panties wet, and that was from a solitary stare
from him. My fingers would itch to touch his flesh, to feel the sinew
under my caress, and it was worse now that I had actually felt him.

I blushed, just remembering stroking his erection, as his hands folded
around mine. Edward had made sure I kept the right pace, and a grip he
preferred. It awakened erotic feelings in me, that I never knew
existed.I'd never been woken by someone wanting me like that. This
was all crazy, and I simply couldn't get my head around it.

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I stumbled through the woods to the McCarty's house, hoping Edward
hadn't followed me. He knew I was due to come here today, and I could
only hope he would give me some space. I had been followed by
someone, though. Newton. He wouldn't leave me alone, so after ten
minutes of shooing him and getting only a dopey look in response, I
decided to leave him. He could wait in their garden for me until I was
ready to leave.

I could see Rosalie in the window. She was on the phone and staring
into the woods. She waved when she saw me and disappeared from
view, but moments before my foot hit the wooden steps, she opened the
door.

"Yes, she's fine," she said into the receiver, rolling her eyes at me. "I'll
take care of her. Edward Masen! Why are you so wound up?"

A small frown formed on her face but it quickly vanished. Edward was
asking about me? He was obviously checking up on me, and instead of
annoying me for invading my privacy, it actually made me smile. He
cared enough to make sure I walked through the woods unharmed.

"Edward? I'm hanging up now...Edward? Bye," she said bluntly, before
ending the call and slipping the phone into the pocket of her gray
sweater.

She smiled warmly at me, and laughed when I came to stand in front of
her.

"We match."

She gestured to her sweater and my attire. I was wearing a gray tank
top, with a sparkling silver scarf, dark jeans and gray boots.

"I guess we're on the same wavelength then?"

"Could be, Miss Swan," she snorted before waving me into the house.

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I walked through to the living room and perched on the couch
cautiously. I was nervous. I'd been a complete blabbermouth when I'd
been here before, and maybe Rose didn't want to hear it all again.

"Bella, don't make a pregnant lady get cross. Sit down properly on that
couch. I invited you here to get to know you. I want to be friends."

The knot in my stomach unraveled a little, and I placed my purse on the
floor, as I sat more comfortably.

"Edward called looking for me?" I questioned shyly.

"Yes, he did," she replied as she too took a seat. "He wanted to know
you'd arrived safely. He said you went without saying goodbye. Care to
explain?"

"It's not really fair for me to keep burdening you with all my problems.
For a start, you're pregnant, and shouldn't be dealing with stress."

"I agree, but it's not my stress, hun. You're not burdening, if I ask for it,
right? Spill it!" she demanded, but laughed immediately afterwards.

I pulled my hat from my head and tried to tame my hair. Rose never
took her blue eyes from me. She wanted to listen, so why was I holding
back? I was fighting with myself, and eventually I had to give in. I
needed a friend too much. So I told her everything, from the walk home
after dinner with her and Emmett. All the way to the wakeup call this
morning. I had to give her credit, I'd expected her to laugh, but she
nodded and let me finish the whole story.

"Damn! You two are insatiable."

"What?" I shouted. "We haven't done anything!"

"Hun, seriously? You think touching his dick is nothing? Grinding up on
his thigh in the dark? Being blindfolded and letting him feel you up?

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Nothing? Really?"

I blushed and hung my head, letting my hair cover my face. When she
put it like that, I had no choice but to admit how much we'd done.

"What I don't understand..," Rose continued. "...is why you're so
uncomfortable with your attraction to him? Bella, I told you last time, it's
not wrong to feel this way about someone. Is there someone else? Is
that what I'm missing?"

I shook my head, and decided to tell her everything. If I wanted a real
friend here in La Push, then I had to reveal my past to her. I took a huge
breath and began the story of my husband and his boyfriend, the bar
owner. She gasped in surprise when I told her it was me that had found
him, on his knees, pleasuring his man.

"Yeah, so that's why it's difficult. Trust isn't something I give naturally
anymore."

"I'm sorry, that's horrendous, and you're going to have to excuse my
frankness, but I still don't understand. I know you're hurting, and I get
your reluctance, but you do trust Edward. I can see it. You wouldn't
have let him blindfold you and feel you up if you didn't. I still don't
understand the embarrassment either."

She smiled, and patted my knee gently. I wanted to cry from the
kindness she was showing me. It was just what I needed.

"Tyler and I never had much of a sex life," I whispered, blushing
furiously. "Obviously, I now know why, but at the time I accepted it for
what it was."

"And what was that?" Rose questioned bluntly.

"Erm, a once every couple of months fumble in the dark?" I shrugged.

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Rose shook her head sadly.

"Bella, you do understand it wasn't you, don't you? This Tyler guy was
confused and used you until he decided what he wanted. I take it this
thing with Edward is the first time you've ever really felt that kind of
attraction? That's why you said he was intense."

"Yes," I whispered, close to tears.

"It feels intense because it's real. It's not something one half of the
partnership is pretending to want. There's nothing wrong or
embarrassing about it. You saw Emmett and me in the kitchen the other
night. We're always like that. The one place we've always worked is in
the bedroom. Can I ask you something?"

I whispered confirmation, even though I knew she'd ask me anyway.

"Was there anyone before Tyler?"

I groaned and slumped on the cushions. I knew I needed to process all
of this before I could grasp what was happening with Edward, but it
didn't make it any less shameful.

"One," I breathed.

"Oh!" Rose couldn't hide her shock. Her blue eyes went wide, and her
eyebrows shot to the ceiling. "Now it's all becoming clear. This one was
your first? Terrible experience, that's why you were fine with the
lukewarm lust from Tyler, because anything was better than that one.
Am I right?"

I hummed in agreement, stunned at just how easily she read me. I didn't
really want to give all the sordid details of my horrendous first time. It
was embarrassing and shameful, something I never wanted to revisit.

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"Hun, it feels intense when you're attracted to someone. Damn,
whenever I look at my Emm, I want to jump his bones, even after all this
time together. He's mine. Made for me, and hell, I want that intensity.
The complete need to devour each other. Why don't you? Why are you
so frightened by that?"

"What if it all goes wrong, Rose?" I whimpered, holding my head in my
hands. "What if I put everything into another relationship, and I fuck this
one up as well?"

"Bella!" Rose snapped. "You didn't mess up the last one! Edward's a big
boy. He can decide for himself what he wants, and it appears to be
you."

She smiled and stroked my arm with one hand while rubbing her little
bump with the other.

"He says he waited for me, Rose. Me," I breathed incredulously.

She nodded.

"I had a feeling. After we spoke in the kitchen the other night, and I told
you the aura he gave off. I watched him with you. Never in the whole
time I've known Edward have I seen him cuddle a woman like he did to
you. The way he looked at you, caressed you. I just knew you were the
one he was waiting for. That's quite a compliment, Bella."

"It scares the shit out of me. He knows what he wants. He's had time to
think things through. This is new to me. Christ, he's new to me."

"Is he rushing you?" she asked urgently.

"No," I denied adamantly. "In fact, he's always telling me I'm not ready
for certain things. It freaks me out that he knows me so well."

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"Why don't you stop being scared, throw caution to the wind and just go
with it? Just enjoy him?"

I ran my fingers through my hair, thinking, while staring at the
photographs hung on the wall. Emmett, Rose and Garrett were a
beautiful family, and now they were having another one, completing
them. It was what I'd always envisioned for myself, and when I thought
of my future now, it was here, in La Push. It was in granddad's house. I
was still too frightened to focus on the man in my dreams, though.

"Edward said he wants all or nothing," I mumbled.

Rose giggled and flicked her blond hair over her shoulder.

"That selfish bastard would say that! It was always his way, or no way at
all. Bella, if you were having fun with him, would it be half-hearted?"

"No."

"I didn't think so. Isn't that giving him your all?"

I understood what she was trying to get me to see, but it still petrified
me.

"He...well, he...How do I say this? Erm, he can be very masterful?" It
came out more like a question, but I wasn't sure of the word I needed to
describe how Edward had been with me during the times we'd touched
or kissed.

A watched a small smile form on Rose's lips, and I knew she
understood what I was getting at.

"He's dominant towards you?"

I nodded and shifted uncomfortably. Would she judge me if I told her I
liked it? Would she judge Edward?

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"Bella," she sighed. "I know exactly how Edward can be. I've watched
him in clubs, and when he feels like company, damn, that boy gets it.
I've also seen the way he acts with that company. Don't you like it?
Because you need to tell him, if that's the case."

"I...In my limited experience it's been me that has had to initiate things.
Me that had to go on top and me that had to take second place, if you
know what I mean."

I blushed furiously. I hadn't even been this candid with Angela. I had no
idea why I felt I could spill everything to Rose. She seemed to
understand me, and really wanted to help.

"And here we are," she laughed. "...right at the heart of the problem. It
didn't take as long as I thought it would."

"What?" I asked, perplexed.

"I'm going to say it straight, because you seem to appreciate that. You
didn't like being the one who had to take charge in the relationship, in
fact, it turned you off. Now you have a man in front of you telling you,
showing you that he will take charge, and he will put you first while
doing that, and yet you're still denying yourself? Do you not see just
how amusing that is?"

I groaned, as the reality of her words struck home. She was right. The
embodiment of what I wanted was in my granddad's house, stewing
about why I had a tantrum this morning.

"I need to apologize to him," I sighed, intending to go and find him.

Rose stopped me by placing a hand over mine.

"No rush, hun. Let his little imagination run wild, it won't do any harm. I
do it to Emmett all the time. I haven't even made you a coffee yet."

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We stood and walked towards the kitchen. I didn't know how I was
going to move forward with Edward, but I knew I wanted to try.

"Tea? Coffee?"

"Coffee, please. So I feel a bit mean coming over here and talking about
me all this time. I haven't asked anything about you. Are you excited
about the baby?"

Her face lit up, her eyes shining with happiness.

"Excitement doesn't even come close. We're all bouncing with
happiness. Emm and I thought we wouldn't have anymore, so this is
amazing. He's already started designing the crib and the details of the
nursery. I tried knitting yesterday. I can't get the hang of it."

"I could help you, if you want? Or if you want something special, tell me,
I'll knit it for you," I said shyly.

"Would you? Really? Oh wow, yes! I want this little blanket, it's
beautiful, and I already have the pattern and the yarn."

I nodded and took the steaming mug of coffee from her. We sat at the
table and chatted endlessly about our lives. I told her things I'd had
locked inside for years, and with anyone else I would have questioned
whether to mention them, but Rose was so easy to talk to. We arranged
to go shopping together in a few days. She thought it was time she
bought a few things for little M, as they were calling the baby. Before I
realized it, it was four hours later.

"Damn, we sure can talk!" she laughed.

"I know, but I've had fun, Rose. I..." My phone chimed in my back
pocket and I stopped talking to see who the message was from.

I should've known.

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BB, I'm worried. Plz call me. I'm sorry. E

"Edward?" Rose asked sweetly.

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"Your face. Go to him, Bella. Tell him how things have been for you. I
know he'll understand, and he'll go at your pace. For what it's worth, I
think you guys are beautiful together. I've never seen Edward as happy
as I did when you guys came to dinner."

"Thank you, Rose."

I picked up my purse and hugged her tightly. I blinked back tears. I
didn't know why I felt like crying, but I knew I couldn't start now. I started
to leave when she stopped me.

"Don't want to be forgetting little M's blankie now, do you?"

I giggled and took the bag from her. I also passed her my cell phone
number.

"I think we'll be using it a lot," I grinned and waved goodbye.

There was a slight spring in my step, as I strolled through the woods. I
felt happier than I had in a long time. Maybe it was just the release of all
the pressure. Maybe it was having a friend and finally feeling like I
belonged here. Whatever it was, it was making me smile, and that had
to be a good thing.

I texted Edward back, as I neared the house, but kept walking, until I
reached the beach.

E - I'm fine. Just talked to Rose. BBS. B x

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I debated whether or not to put the kiss at the end, but decided it was
only a cross. I wasn't signing my life away or anything.

I plonked myself down on the edge of the beach, and leaned back
against my fence. I wanted a little time to think. A little time on my own
to absorb everything that had happened this morning. I pulled the yarn
and knitting needles from the bag, and started to read the pattern Rose
had given me. It seemed straight forward enough, so I began to cast on
and follow the instructions.

I watched the people on the beach, remembering my time here when I
was a child. Those two summers had always been my happiest
memories, and I'd always wanted to come back here. However, now I
was here, I was wasting my time, by focusing on silly trivial matters.
Talking to Rose had really helped me see things clearer.

My phone chimed in my pocket again, and I placed the knitting needles
down to answer it. It was from my editor at the magazine. They had an
assignment for me, and she'd email me the details. That certainly made
me feel more positive. It would give me something to focus on, other
than my half dressed houseguest.

As if summoned by my thoughts alone, I saw Edward running along the
beach. Newton was at his heels, keeping pace. I sat and stared at the
man before me. His chest was bare, and his dark running shorts hung
low on his hips. I watched his torso twist as he moved his arms in time
with his legs. It was fascinating to watch. He hadn't noticed me, so I just
continued to drink my fill of his nakedness.

I knew I was ogling him, but there were very few people on the beach
and he was mine anyway.

Whoa!

Mine?

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I was startled I'd actually thought of him that way, but the more I thought
it, the more I liked it. Edward Masen had stolen my heart many years
ago; maybe it was time for me to steal his. Before I could second guess
my actions, I shouted to Newton and waved, knowing it would distract
Edward.

He looked around, his green eyes focused on mine, before a huge grin
broke across his face. He came running towards me, and I had to check
my chin was drool free.

"I thought you'd gotten lost in the woods. I wondered if I needed to send
out a search party to rescue you from the big bad wolf," he panted
before sitting down next to me.

"You can't save me from yourself, Edward."

He snorted loudly, before bringing his face closer to mine and
whispering, "You think I'm the big bad wolf, BB?"

"I don't think it," I said breathlessly, playing him at his own game. "I
know it."

His brows rose at my response, and the left side of his mouth quirked in
a small smile.

"Do you want to make a point of telling me how big certain parts of me
are?"

His words dripped with innuendo, and I knew this was my opportunity to
sink or swim. I chose the latter, as I replied, "I already know just how big
it is Mr. Masen. I've felt it. I'm sure you remember."

The smirk disappeared and was replaced with a stunned expression I'd
never seen on Edward's face before. Shock.

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I chalked up a small victory. It only took him an instant to regain his
composure though.

"Playful this afternoon, aren't we?"

I put the knitting down on top of my purse and turned my body to his.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I heard the slight quiver to my voice,
showing him I wasn't as confident as I made out.

Before I could elaborate, I was pinned to the sand with Edward hovering
over me. His hair hung down over his forehead, and his eyes glittered
with glee.

"Are you feeling this playful? Or is it all mouth and no action, BB?" he
said seductively against my lips.

I swallowed, knowing it was now or never. This was my opportunity to
show him I wanted to try. Slowly, and with trepidation, I pushed my
tongue between my lips and licked them. It skimmed Edward's own lips
and a low rumble reverberated from his chest. The vibrations danced
across my torso, making my stomach flutter and my nipples tingle.

Growing more confident, I lapped at his lower lip, trying to elicit a
response from him. The groan came again, followed by a warning, "BB."

To make sure he understood what I wanted, I stroked my hands up his
back, feeling the toned sinew beneath my fingers tips. He growled
before closing the tiny distance between our mouths and devouring me.
I purred in delight, as his tongue plundered my mouth, desperate to
taste me. I threaded my fingers into his hair and tugged, knowing how
much he enjoyed it. Even in the short space of time we'd known each
other there were things I knew which turned him on. I wanted to do
them all, even though we were outside. Even though people were
walking by us.

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His hand skimmed my waist, down to my thigh, and tugged harshly.
Doing as he wanted, I wrapped my leg around his hip, and gained a
hiss of pleasure from him, as his erection nestled on top of my sex.
Visions of this morning and the feeling of his hard on in my hand shot
through my head, making me gasp. Edward ground his hips against
mine, and gazed down at me.

"Is that the kind of playing you wanted to do?"

"Hmm," was the best I could muster. I was still trying to catch my
breath.

I could feel his fingers gripping my thigh tightly around his waist, as he
rocked his cock slowly against me. It was a delicious torture.

"Edward, you're just teasing yourself. Stop moving," I smiled.

"No. I can't. BB, right now, those people over there are the only things
stopping me from burying my cock so far inside you, you'd be
screaming my name until you were hoarse."

My eyes went wide, and I literally stopped breathing. He smirked and
nodded, before continuing.

"I can play, but remember my games may have slightly different
connotations than yours."

I gulped, guessing what he meant, but I wanted it. I wanted Edward.

"I'm ready," I whispered.

He rolled off me and stood up. I felt instantly bereft, but laughed when I
saw his tented shorts.

"Get up," he stated bluntly.

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"What?" I asked, confused by his change in demeanour.

I stood and dusted sand off my jeans. Edward retrieved my purse and
the knitting, and held his hand out for me to take. I linked my fingers in
his and gazed at him apprehensively.

"We're going home to get changed," he said gruffly.

"Why?"

We began to walk back through the garden to the house. Edward
whistled for Newton, and it was only seconds before the dog appeared
at our feet.

"We're going out tonight."

"I...we didn't arrange...what?" I stuttered in confusion.

He spun me to face him, as we neared the front door and wrapped his
arms around my waist. I wanted to snuggle against his chest, to revel in
his scent, but waited for him to respond. His words were soft and
seductive when he did.

"BB, if we're going to do this, I at least want some form of normality for
you. Therefore I'm taking you on a date."

"Oh! I see."

The smug grin was back, making my body hum with lust.

"I want you to look stunning, because I'm taking you to dinner. I want
every man in the room green with envy, because they can see you're
mine. I'll feed you, and lick the remains from your lips. Then I'm taking
you dancing. I want you hot and bothered, grinding your sweet little ass
against my crotch, until I drag you back here."

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I lost the ability to think, or form any kind of coherent sentence. So I
opened and closed my mouth like a fish. He snorted and kissed my lips
quickly, before patting me on the ass.

"Go and get ready. I'm calling the florist."

I walked, bewildered into the house, as I heard him mutter, "I think I
need to buy Rosalie flowers."

I sincerely hoped I hadn't bitten off more than I could chew.

Next... DATE NIGHT! And you never know what can happen on
date night. ;)

I've been nom'd for Best Author in the Sparkle Awards, which left
me stunned.

Vote at http :/ thesparkleawards(dot)webs(dot)com/vote(dot)htm
(take out the spaces and replace the (dot) with a real one.)

One last request... I want you all to RUN to read a fic I discovered
this week. It's hilarious. Geek Love by SassenachWench.

Thank you xxx

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11. Chapter 11: Date Night

Sorry I didn't reply to any reviews last time... I've been sick.

Love to my amazing betas, Maylin & Twirlgrrl. You ladies make my
day.

Ass grabs to hunterhuntering for prereading my rambles. I heart
you lady!

For all of you missing EPOV...here it is...A WHOLE DAY EARLY!

SM owns all things Twilight. I own a lot of useless crap.

EPOV

Bella had said she was ready.

For me.

I knew she had no idea what that entailed, so I was going to try and go
slow with this. Going on a date was what normal people did. I could at
least give her that, because this was far from normal, nor could it ever
be.

In truth, I needed the distraction, because when she'd been underneath
me on the beach, I hadn't been lying when I told her I was seconds
away from taking her. The temptation was always there, simmering
under the surface, and all it took was one glance for it to reach boiling
point again. But, fuck me, it was staring me in the face now. It took the
form of a tight purple dress, and heels I would adore to have digging
into my ass, as her legs wrapped around my waist.

Bella had laughed when she saw my face, as she sauntered down the
stairs. The little minx knew what that dress would do to me. Every time

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she turned around I would study the fabric to see if I could find any tell
tale lines of what lay beneath it. I couldn't make out a fucking thing. She
wasn't confident enough to go without any underwear at all, and I was
dying with curiosity. The image in my head was of minuscule scraps of
lace...and with that thought all the blood raced to my cock. My pants
were now incredibly tight.

I was in a constant state of arousal and with minimal space in the house
to jerk off; it was starting to irritate me. Even when I finally managed to
get her impaled on me, I didn't think it would truly sate the need.

I'd ordered Rose some flowers, while I waited. I seriously needed to
thank her for talking to Bella. Whatever she'd said had brought about a
change of heart. I was unsure what to wear, and would have been
happy in worn jeans and a polo shirt, though I don't think Bella would
have appreciated them. She deserved better, so I'd opted for a black
dress shirt, and some smart black pinstripe trousers.

My eyes had followed her around the room, watching her as she added
the final touches to her appearance. I wanted to get down on my knees
and beg her to stay home. The dress was the perfect torture device,
and I couldn't even look at the shoes anymore. Too many erotic
scenarios raced through my head, and I caught myself groaning, as we
walked to the car.

If I thought things were difficult while she was strutting around the
house, then they became a million times worse when she sat next to me
in the car. Her perfume filled the small space, and a new wave floated
out towards me every time she moved. The vanilla scent tickled my
nostrils, and made me lick my lips, wanting to taste her to see if she
was as good as she smelled. I lit a cigarette hoping to drown out her
scent, but it didn't work.

I could see the dress pulled tight across her thighs, and it had ridden up,
showing me nothing but delicious creamy flesh. I teased us both by
skimming my knuckles up and down her legs every time I shifted gears.

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Bella wasn't oblivious to my arousal. I watched her squeeze her thighs
together, whenever I caressed her, and she certainly couldn't deny her
pert nipples, because they were evident through the fabric of her dress.
It only made me want to seduce her more.

We arrived at the restaurant, and I rushed to open her door. She
blinked, startled at my chivalry. She had so much to learn about me,
and I was determined tonight would only be the start. I entwined my
fingers with hers and tugged her gently into the restaurant. The waitress
smiled warmly, leading us to a secluded booth at the back. An anxious
silence settled around us, as we ordered our drinks. She'd decided on a
white wine, but as I was driving I opted for orange juice. Bella began
gnawing away at her lower lip. My groin tightened at the sight of her
perfect white teeth, as they teased the pink flesh. I leaned towards her
and placed my fingers on her chin, plucking the skin from her incisor.

"You'll make yourself bleed," I stated quietly. "Why are you so
nervous?"

"You!" she replied, as if that was an answer.

"What about me, BB? We've eaten together before. Why is there a
problem now?"

She fidgeted with the linen napkin on the table, and diverted her gaze
from mine. I didn't want the night to be filled with awkwardness. I
wanted her to remember it, and to remember it fondly. This was our first
date, and therefore, important to both of us.

I leaned in and kissed her lips. It was meant to be a small taste, intent
on soothing her anxiety. I cupped her cheek, and moved my lips across
hers. However, the moment her tongue dipped into my mouth the kiss
spiralled out of control. I growled, moving my hand to the back of her
head and pressing, so her lips pushed harshly against mine. Whenever
I thought I was being too dominant towards her she would always
surprise me by humming in approval, exactly like she was now.

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I shifted closer to her body, skimming my hand under the table and
slowly up her thigh. My fingers tickled the hem of her dress, brushing
against her skin. Bella slid her leg closer to my hand, wanting more, as
my fingers crawled their way under the hem. They were intent on one
destination.

My tongue lapped against hers, tasting her lip gloss along with pure
delectable Bella.

"Are you ready to order?" A voice chimed, breaking us from our bliss.

Bella retreated instantly. Her cheeks flushed, and her lips swollen. She
was panting slightly, as she raised her hand to touch her lips. She eyed
me warily, bewildered by what was flowing between us. I smiled smugly,
and nodded to the waitress. I had to adjust my trousers before taking
the menu, and it was lucky the table covered my lap.

The air crackled with sexual tension, and if everything went according to
plan, it would be a lot worse before the night was through. I wanted
Bella begging for me. I needed her to feel the same way I did. I took a
huge gulp of the tart juice and watched her.

She hid behind the menu, mumbling her order. She didn't acknowledge
me again until she was sipping her wine.

"So, are you going to answer me?" I questioned.

Her brows furrowed in confusion, as she tried to recall our previous
conversation.

"I think I should tell you about my talk with Rosalie."

I nodded sharply and waited. This needed to be something she
admitted to. I wasn't going to help her. Aro had told me on so many
occasions that when the time finally came, I would need to be careful.
Up until now I'd tried to heed his advice, but had fallen flat on my face.

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My emotions and libido always got the best of me.

"Rose made me see things a little differently, that's all. When you told
me you'd been waiting for me, it unnerved me. Add that to what Rose
told me only a few hours prior, and you had me running scared."

"What did she tell you?"

Bella's cheeks stained a little reminding me to back off. She was getting
anxious.

"Well, I asked about your previous girlfriends, and your...erm, intensity."

I could tell from the slight questioning tone that intensity wasn't the word
she really meant. I just couldn't decide whether to call her out on her
wording. I didn't want her to turn tail and bolt, but I needed honesty.

"Intensity?" I asked, deciding to leave the explanations up to her.

She fiddled with the stem of her wine glass, twirling it between her
finger and thumb.

"OK, this is completely embarrassing. I've never had the kind of reaction
that I have to you. It feels overwhelming sometimes, but not necessarily
in a bad way. I don't know how else to describe it. Rose said it's natural.
I have no idea, and nothing to base it on."

She blushed furiously at her declaration, but it made me smile. Rose
really had made her see clearly. I just had to get her to stop being
mortified by it. I slid my hand across the table and linked my fingers with
hers. She gazed at me through her lashes, and I bit back a moan.

"I don't know what Rose told you about girlfriends, but I can tell you I
haven't had them," I said simply.

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"I asked about them. However, she corrected me, by letting me know
that they were best described as company?"

"You mean sex, BB? Fuck, just say it! Yes, I had sex with other women.
I'm not a fucking hermit. I didn't spend the last twenty-odd years waiting
for you and letting myself wither away. Is that what shocks you? The
fact that I can tell you I'm waiting and wanting you, but have fucked
others?"

She cringed at my last line, but we needed to get a few things straight. I
had nothing to hide.

"No, that's not it, and keep your voice down," she replied mutedly. "I see
the way women look at you. Edward, almost every female in this room
is eyeballing you now, but it's not that that bothers me. It's you!"

"I need you to explain, Bella. I know you feel this between us, and you
never say no when I kiss you, so tell me. Please?"

"With Tyler sex was very..."

"Boring?" I interrupted, knowing it couldn't have possibly been fulfilling.

It wasn't with me.

"...functional," she continued, ignoring me. "He never did the things you
do, and I'd have been shocked if he did. I don't know why I accept them
from you."

"Because it turns you on. It arouses you when I pull your hair, when I
tell you I'm hard for you. I'm curious though, what things in particular?"

Her dark eyes darted everywhere but in my direction, and I wanted to
shake her. I hated the fact that she was so nervous around me. I
disliked it when I had to keep pushing beyond her comfort zone, just to
get her to be honest with me.

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"I don't think it matters," she replied bluntly.

I leaned a little closer before uttering huskily, "Oh, but BB it does. I need
to know what things make you want me, because I will do those more. I
need you wet and ready for me."

Her mouth fell open at the exact moment our food arrived. I couldn't
have timed it any better. It would give her time to absorb my request
and finally give me an answer.

I studied her as she toyed with the pasta. She didn't look very
impressed with it, but when I questioned her, she said she wasn't very
hungry. I speared some asparagus on my fork and lifted it to her lips.

"Bite," I demanded.

Her eyes were always questioning my motives, and only time would get
her to trust me completely.

"Bite," I repeated, never moving the food.

"I don't..."

"Do it, Bella," I said, rolling my eyes in exasperation.

She opened her mouth, and I moved the fork slowly inside. Her tongue
darted out to catch it, and my groin tightened. I remembered being
jealous of a fat plastic doll in the barn, but that was nothing compared to
the envy I was feeling for that stalk of asparagus now. I pulled the fork
from her lips and she chewed delicately, sighing in approval.

I squirmed in my seat. This was fucking Hell.

I noticed a little of the sauce left at the corner of her mouth, and thought
about telling her. However, I remembered my words from earlier, when
we were on the beach. I moved carefully towards her, making sure she

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was watching, as I brought my mouth to hers. My tongue lapped against
her skin, removing the sauce and tasting Bella along with it. I didn't
move back, my lips rubbed tantalizingly against hers as I spoke.

"Fucking delicious."

She hummed in agreement, but she misunderstood me.

"I wasn't talking about the food." I pulled back slightly, until she was
gazing into my eyes. "You. You're fucking delicious, and I can't wait to
taste every fucking inch of you."

Bella made a strangled sound. It was as if she was trying to rein herself
in, but never quite made it. I scanned her face for signs of annoyance,
but was pleased to see nothing but arousal. Her skin on the column of
her neck had begun to mottle and her chest was rising and falling
rapidly. The seduction was definitely working.

I leaned back towards my food, and spoke as if nothing had just
occurred between us.

"So, I'd really like to continue our discussion." I waited a heartbeat,
wanting her to think I was asking for more instances that turned her on.
"What did Rosalie tell you about my female company?"

Bella pushed her plate away, obviously losing her appetite.

"She told me when you wanted it, you got it."

"Do you think that's wrong? Does that disgust you?"

"No," she replied quietly. "But I think it should. Maybe you'll laugh at my
little declaration, but Edward, I've only ever been with two people, and
your confidence about us scares me. When you touch me, it's as
though you have a right to."

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"I do," I stated.

"Why? Because you waited for me? Edward, do you know how
ludicrous that sounds? Put yourself in my position and really think about
it. Please?" she begged.

The waitress approached and cleared our plates. Bella took a large gulp
of wine, and I noticed it was starting to stain her lips. They were red and
pouting out in defiance, completely delectable and I didn't know just
how long I could wait before tasting her again.

"BB, I've thought about you every waking hour of the fucking day since
you returned. You have no idea of your power over me, do you? You
think I control what you feel, but you're wrong. What you feel is
attraction, and it's not wrong, or dirty, or sleazy. You need to realize
you're the one that holds the power in this game. I merely dish out the
details of the next round."

"But, you...I..." she stuttered, trying to form the right words.

"Just tell me! Say it! I have no idea what's going on in your beautiful
head, unless you tell me. I cannot read your mind. I've been asking you
all night about what the hell Rose told you that made you change your
mind, but you've managed to side step the whole thing. Tell me!" I
growled.

She grabbed her purse off the table and flung her napkin down.

"I won't have you snarling at me, Edward!"

I watched her start to walk from the restaurant, unsteady on her feet.
She was shaken by the turn of our conversation. I'd fucked up, and
needed to sort this out. I was not willing to lose her. I settled the bill
quickly, knowing that the only way she could get home would be by cab,
and rushed outside to look for her.

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I found her sitting on the wall, swinging her legs as if she didn't have a
care in the world.

"What the fuck, Bella?" I moaned.

She smirked and raised her brows at me.

"Power? I was testing, just to see if you were right." She shrugged. "I
guess you were. I do hold a lot. I made you walk out of there."

"What the hell?"

Bella stood and linked her arm into mine, smiling up at me.

"Look, I'm not denying an attraction, but you have to give me time. You
know what happened."

I nodded as we began to walk away from the restaurant.

"Is that what you told Rose? That you're attracted to me?" I asked
smugly.

"Christ, Edward, stop fishing for compliments. I think it's pretty obvious I
am, but your confidence puts me on edge a little."

I looked down at her, somewhat confused by her words.

"Confidence? Bella are you avoiding the real issue again?" I groaned
and pulled her to a stop, making her face me. "Do you mean my
confidence around you, or are we talking about my confidence with
you? Because they are totally different things, and I think I'm finally
cutting through your fog of ramblings."

She tried to lower her face, to hide behind a curtain of hair, but I tucked
it behind her ear and bent my knees. It brought me eye level with her.

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"With me," she whispered.

Those two little words made me feel weightless. I finally understood why
she was fighting me, fighting this. I bought my hand to her face and
cupped her cheek.

"BB, I apologize for scaring you, but you must understand, I've had a
long time to imagine how we will fit together. I know what I want, and
pretty much when I want it. I also know how I like it. It seems to me you
know none of those things about yourself, so don't think of me as
aggressive, or dominant. I would never hurt you just to get what I
wanted from this relationship. I may tug your hair when I kiss you, or
slap your ass as I enter your amazing body, but that's because I know
you'll enjoy it. If I'm wrong, all you have to do is tell me."

She closed her eyes fleetingly, as if savouring the words. I knew I
wasn't wrong. She had enjoyed the hair pulling, and I was damn sure
she'd like me slapping her ass, but I understood her reticence.

I placed a quick peck on her lips and linked my arm back in hers.

"Come on," I sang.

"The car's back that way, Edward," she moaned.

"We're not getting in the car. I promised you a date, and since we didn't
really eat, I think we'll do something else instead."

She sighed but followed me. That was until we reached Club V, and
then she balked.

"I'm not dancing with you!" she protested.

"Yes, you are."

I dragged her inside and pulled her arm out to be stamped.

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"All you have to do is say no," I stated.

"I just did. Outside! And you dragged me in here anyway!"

We walked down the stairs, as the thumping music bounced up to greet
us.

"You never actually said no," I retorted.

"ARGH! Fucking semantics."

She was about to storm out into the crowded room, when I pulled her
back and wrapped my arms around her waist. She relaxed into my
embrace immediately, proving she was never really angry. I nudged her
hair from her neck with my chin and kissed just underneath her lobe,
eliciting a low moan from her.

"Remember, BB, I do these things, because I know what you'll like.
Ignore all the people and just feel me behind you." I lapped at the shell
of her ear and continued. "Forget them, focus on me. Can you feel my
heat as it hits your back?"

I felt her nod at the same time I felt her throat vibrate, as she hummed. I
rocked my hips, making sure my arousal brushed the base of her spine.

"Can you feel my body, hard, as it presses against yours?"

"Yes," she breathed.

I stepped her slowly to the dance floor, never letting go and continually
talking softly into her ear. I don't think she heard most of what I was
saying, but the rumble of my voice against the sound of the thumping
base helped her forget the other people filling the club.

I could have laughed as the beat of David Guetta - When Love Takes
Over began to pound across the dance floor. It was rather fitting, and

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the beat was perfect for rocking my hips against hers. I kept her back to
my front and swayed us from side to side with the rhythm. I moved my
arm bit by bit until my hands held her hips.

She surprised me, as she became more confident and wiggled her ass,
gazing over her shoulder at me. She was testing the power I'd told her
she possessed. It made me grin, and I squeezed her hips gently.

Bella turned around to face me, as the bass slowed a little. Her eyes
went wide as she recognized the song.

"I love this one!" she shouted into my ear.

Rhianna began singing about running a town, but I was lost. Bella's legs
were either side of one of mine as she twisted with the music. Each
sway rubbed her pussy against my thigh, making me grit my teeth. If I
thought the dress was torture, I was wrong. The dress plus grinding to
this music, in a club full of people, was sheer agony.

She placed a hand on my shoulder, and rested back into her
movements. Her hair swished with the motion, and I watched her
singing along. She was in complete abandon, happy in this moment.

She was happy with me.

That was the only thought I needed to stop me thinking with my cock,
and just enjoy this night. We spent the next forty minutes with our
bodies caressing against each other to the beats. Eventually we had to
stop. I needed a drink, and Bella needed the bathroom. I walked to the
bar and ordered us some drinks, while I waited for her to return. I
needed a smoke, but didn't want to go outside and leave her in here
alone, and wondering where I'd gone to. I could manage without, the
only drug I needed was Bella.

As if on cue, I saw her appear on the other side of the dance floor. She
literally took my breath away. I picked up our drinks and walked over to

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her. She smiled at me and took a sip.

"Water?" she asked, gesturing to my bottle.

I nodded, before reminding her I was driving. She checked her watch,
making me wonder if I was boring her.

"Something wrong?" I questioned.

"Oh, no! I was just wondering whether it was too early to go home."

"What? You want to go home?"

Bella giggled, and rested her hand on my wrist.

"No, but as you can't drink, I wondered if you wanted to go home, so
you could. I'm having a great time. Really."

I exhaled in relief. She wasn't bored and she wanted the night to
continue, but she wanted us alone. I smirked at her, erotic little images
of us drunk flitting through my head.

"We could do that. I have some liquor at home, but I have two
requests."

She rolled her eyes, and pouted her lips petulantly.

"I want one more dance," I continued.

"Sure," she agreed, and drained her glass. "But what's the second."

I took the glass from her and placed it on the nearest table, along with
my bottled water. I entwined my fingers into hers and pulled her to the
dance floor. She laughed and followed quickly.

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"The second," I replied, raising my thumb to her lips. "...is to take this
God damned gunk off your lips. It tastes foul."

I rubbed my thumb across her mouth, removing every inch of the lip
gloss. She watched me, her eyes glittering under the flashing lights,
Jason Mraz started to drift through the speakers. Bella instantly started
moving her shoulders. She liked this one too.

I slipped my arms around her waist and moved her gently. I could swear
she sighed into my embrace, but with the noise of the other people and
the music, I couldn't be certain. She looped her arms around my neck,
still holding her little purse, and brought her body closer to mine.

I'll be giving it my bestest
Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some

I could feel her humming against my shoulder. It was sending luscious
little vibrations across my chest, but they invariably took the same path.
Directly towards my cock. However, when I heard her sing along with
the next few lines, I couldn't mistake their meaning.

I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours

She wanted me. She really was ready.

I glanced down at her, and was met with her huge doe eyes.

"Do you..." I hesitated.

"Let's go home, Edward."

I didn't wait to hear anymore. I dragged her from the club and towards
my car with super human speed.

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We sat on the floor of the living room laughing loudly. We'd been back
at the house for about an hour, and it was long past midnight. We'd
drunk a third of the bottle of tequila, and were both a little worse for
wear. It didn't stop the endless stream of silly stories and dirty jokes. I
was stunned at just how many she knew.

"OK, OK, here's another. How are women and tornadoes alike?"

"I have no fucking idea," I answered, downing another shot.

"They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when
they leave," she replied, cracking up into fits of giggles, and rolling
around on the floor.

I chuckled, but hissed as her dress rode up revealing the crease of her
ass cheek. My laughter immediately ceased. Bella glared at me
seriously.

"Hey! Was that one not funny enough? All right then, try this one. A man
and a woman start to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After
about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I
had a flashlight!" The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass
for the past ten minutes!"

I couldn't stop it; laughter bubbled up and burst from my lips. She
followed suit and before I realized it her head was in my lap and we
were grinning at one another.

The giggling forgotten.

It was me and Bella.

She lifted her hand to touch my cheek, but it slipped and she ended up
batting my nose softly.

"Sorry," she whined.

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I stroked the hair from her face, telling her it was OK. I was about to kiss
her when she moaned, "Why is the room spinning?"

I groaned. She was drunk. Fuck!

"Bella, are you drunk?"

"No! No, definitely not," she denied.

She slapped my face absently again, and I knew then that she was
completely intoxicated. She was smiling and happy though. I'd given her
a memorable first date, and that's all that mattered to me.

I shuffled her limp body to one side and stood up. She whimpered as I
hauled her up, slipping my arm under her knees and carrying her to the
stairs.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm taking you to bed, BB. You need to sleep it off."

She began snorting and giggling again. I had no idea at what, but she
found it highly amusing. I grinned at her silly behavior and carried her to
the bedroom.

I placed her on the bed, and swallowed hard at the vision before me.
Her hair spilled gently across the sheets, as she threw her arms out in
abandon. Her dress was just skimming her pussy and her legs curled
up, showing me those fucking hot heels. I had a choice to make.

Did I undress her for bed?

Did I leave her as she was?

I knew she'd be annoyed at me if I undressed her, but she couldn't
sleep in those shoes. I knelt by the bed and unbuckled the ankle straps

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and set them behind the door. I turned intending to kiss her goodnight,
when she sat up and began tugging the dress over her head. I gasped,
as I finally saw what lay beneath. My vision of miniscule scraps of lace
was almost spot on. She flopped back onto the bed and turned onto her
side, mumbling.

"Goodnight BB," I whispered and began to walk from the room.

"Where are you going?" she asked mutedly.

"BB..." I moaned, not really sure what I needed to say.

"Edward, please?"

I knew what she was asking. I just didn't want it thrown in my face in the
morning, when she woke next to me in only her tiny underwear. I
walked around the side of the bed, so I could see her face. She fisted
my shirt and pulled me down onto the bed, and alongside her. I could
have put up a fight. I hadn't been drinking, and she wasn't strong, but I
wanted to sleep next to her, so I moved when she pulled.

"I want you here," she stated, and shuffled, so her head was resting on
my chest.

"Bella, I..."

"Shut it!" she interrupted. "Sleep."

I snorted, but cuddled her closer.

Maybe she would regret this in the morning, but that didn't mean I
couldn't enjoy this now. I closed my eyes, and stroked her hair. It was
only minutes before we were both falling into a blissful sleep, holding
each other tightly.

*insert evil laugh here*

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Got any dirty jokes you want to share?

Press that button and tell me...please?

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12. Chapter 12: Abandon

I am a total fail at replying, but I want you all to know I read every
single one and adore the comments you make.

Love as always to my awesome betas Maylin & Twirlgrrl. I adore
you both.

Hunterhunting gets smooches and gropes for pre reading.

Thanks to the Perv Pack Smut Shack, who have recci'd Tides this
week and said some amazing things about it.

SM owns all things Twilight. I own the new VF with Rob Porn in full
force!

I woke to the sensation of warm naked skin wrapped around mine. My
head throbbed a little and my limbs ached. The previous night drifted
back to me slowly: the drinking, the dancing and the sleeping.

I groaned, moving slightly, and feeling the body adjust around me. I
knew who it was, because I wasn't drunk enough to forget what I'd
asked him. I also knew I was almost naked next to him.

I glanced at the clock, realizing it was only a couple of hours after we'd
gone to bed. Edwards's breath fanned across my shoulder in a slow
and steady pace. I took in his sleeping form. He looked serene in
slumber. He really was the most attractive man I'd ever set eyes on,
and if I truly wanted him he could be mine. I just had to deal with my
insecurities and make the decision.

Last night, while dancing in the club, I'd told him I was ready. I meant it,
but the choice scared the hell out of me. I wanted to talk to Rose, but
three-forty-five on a Sunday morning was not the best time to disturb a
pregnant friend.

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I needed to clear my head, so gently slipped from Edward's embrace
and from the bed. I searched the room for something to wear. He'd
taken off his black shirt and discarded it on the floor. I slipped into it,
fastening the buttons over my tiny lace underwear.

The way he was sprawled across the bed reminded me of the way I'd
found him on the first day I'd arrived. I couldn't deny that part of me
wanted to climb back into bed and snuggle next to his warmth, but I
needed a few moments alone.

I padded downstairs and slipped on my Ugg boots. Newton began
wagging his tail in the hope we were going for a walk. I'd only intended
to sit out on the porch, but the beach would be deserted at this time in
the morning, so my attire, or lack thereof, wouldn't matter. I stroked his
head and opened the front door, pushing the mesh screen out of the
way. Walking along the beach would help clear my head.

I strolled through the garden and towards the beach. Newton ran on
ahead, rushing towards the sea and barking at the waves. I giggled at
him, but hoped the dog wasn't loud enough to wake Edward. Before
sitting down, I slipped off my boots and set them to one side. I wiggled
my toes in the cool sand. The wind whipped around me, tangling my
hair around my face, but I was happy to stay for a while and let my mind
wander.

I was looking at the horizon, but not really acknowledging it. My
thoughts floated off on a path of their own. I needed to understand, and
really believe the issue with Tyler hadn't been my fault. It didn't happen
because I wasn't attractive enough, or because I didn't please him
sexually. Tyler simply wasn't attracted to women, and the fact that he
hid that from me was on him. I had to move past that, otherwise I would
never have a relationship again.

Edward was attracted to me, and he'd already admitted the ball was
now definitely in my court. I had to make the next move.

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Talking to Rose yesterday had helped immensely. The date had been
my opportunity to dip my toe in the water. I now had to choose when to
jump in. I knew I had many things to work through and process, my
feelings about Tyler being at the forefront. However, I understood they
shouldn't stop me from finding my own way and discovering who I was.
That was why I'd come here to begin with.

I yelled into the wind, trying to release my pent up aggression, because
no matter how long I thought about it, I just kept running around in
circles. I would always end up back here.

With Edward.

"You're going to get cold."

I should have been startled by the velvety smooth voice, but my body
seemed to sense him, before my brain acknowledged he was near.

"I'm fine. I just needed to clear my head, and Newton needed a run."

Edward snorted, "Not at four AM, he doesn't."

I pointed out towards the sea. Newton was splashing about in the
waves, barking loudly.

"And you only needed to clear your head because you drank too much
liquor."

I hummed in agreement with him, before finally looking in his direction.
His hair was its usual disarray, and he was grinning wildly at me. His
torso was bare; reminding me I was wearing his shirt. He said nothing
further, just studied me.

"I had fun last night. Thank you," I whispered, wanting to fill the silence.

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"Are you sure? Because you're here brooding alone, and that bothers
me."

He came to sit beside me, and I could already feel the warmth rolling off
him, like the waves across the beach.

"I'm not brooding. I'm thinking."

"You're always thinking, BB," he breathed. "Why can't you just go with
it? Shut your brain down and just feel."

He trailed a finger from my knee, down my exposed calf to my ankle. I
shivered at the contact, but kept my leg very still. I wanted his touch
again. I wanted his hands on me. Most of all, I wanted his lips on mine.

I wanted him period.

"I find it difficult to just 'go with' things. My brain always takes over.
Given what happened, I now have this need to analyze every possible
outcome." I rested my cheek on my knees and stared directly at him.
"I'm so scared of being hurt like that again, Edward."

He reached out and smoothed the hair from my cheek. His eyes flashed
fiercely with his words, "BB, I would never hurt you. Ever. Besides the
fact that I don't have a boner for blokes, I don't have it in me to cause
you that kind of pain. I don't want to keep saying this, but you need to
give us a chance."

His fingers stroked my cheek, and I closed my eyes, luxuriating in the
touch.

"I'm frightened."

"Stop!" he stated. "I understand that, but are you going to let that affect
the rest of your life? Are you locking yourself away, or are you going to
try and change it? It's always been your choice. Bella, I've been all in

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since the day my ball hit your sandcastle."

I inhaled sharply. He'd told me he'd waited for me, but those last few
words had brought it all crashing home.

Edward had waited for me.

Would a man who waited patiently for over twenty years really hurt me?

The answer rang loudly in my head. I was keeping myself hidden, when
happiness could be sitting next to me, stroking my cheek.

"Take a chance. I'm here," he crooned, as he shuffled closer.

I knew he could see my walls beginning to crumble around me. The
more he whispered. The more he touched. Piece by piece it began to
fall.

"Edward..." I said softly.

"What?"

"Kiss me."

The words hadn't completely left my mouth before his lips met mine. I'd
expected it to be rough and passionate, but it began tentative, slow and
testing. He was allowing me time to back out. Edward didn't think I
meant it.

I purred, as his hand cupped the back of my neck, pulling me closer to
his mouth. I pushed my tongue cautiously along his teeth and slid it
against his. The moment they touched all hell broke loose. Edward
growled and pushed me back onto the sand. He blanketed me with his
lush, warm body, and began to devour my neck. Little nips and licks
were delivered to the delicate flesh, making me hiss and groan in
pleasure.

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Edward's thigh came to rest between my legs, and I rocked my hips
forward. Only a thin veil of lace and the material of his trousers
separated skin from molten skin. His hand moved up slowly from my
knee, caressing my thigh and finally massaging my ass. The shirt had
ridden up, and was now twisted around my waist.

I gasped, as he sucked on my collarbone; his teeth marking the skin,
marking me as his. However, any pain caused was soon forgotten as
his tongue lapped at the tender skin. My hips bucked, as my fingers
clenched in his hair. He chuckled against my chest, and nosed the
fabric further out of the way.

"Such abandon," he muttered.

I couldn't comprehend what he was talking about. My mind was swiftly
becoming aroused goo. My skin tingled with awareness. We were really
going to do this; here, on the beach where we'd met. The thought made
me giggle lightly.

Edward stopped his soft licks at my chest and stared at me. His eyes
dripped with lust, and even in the minimal light I could see their
intensity. He raised his brows, before stating, "I'm hoping my seduction
isn't comical, BB. If it is, I'll have to reconsider."

I licked my lips nervously and shook my head, not trusting myself to
speak. I didn't think my voice would work. It would be more of a
whimper, either that, or I'd just beg him to take me. When I didn't reply
he swiftly took command of the situation. He grabbed hold of my hands
and raised them above my head, pinning them onto the sand. I
immediately began panting. This was just as I'd dreamed so many
times. I'd fantasized about an imaginary lover that would pin me to the
floor and feast on my body.

He looked down at me, his hair hanging slightly over his eyes. He was
checking I was OK with this. I blinked at him, hoping it was confirmation.
I knew this was it, and I wanted him to take me here. This felt right.

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His mouth crashed to mine, as he kissed me passionately. His tongue
took mine, mating deliciously, before pulling away, leaving me gasping
for air and fumbling for coherent words.

"You are fucking stunning. You have no idea what this means to me,
BB. No fucking idea."

He kissed me again, rougher, much more demanding. Teeth clashed
and tongues danced. He bit at my lips and when I yelped, he licked
them better, just as he'd done with my chest. I never thought of biting as
arousing, but when Edward did it I wanted to beg for more. He was in
complete control of the situation, in complete control of my lust, and just
as Rose had said, I was enjoying it.

I felt his erection pressing against his trousers, and I tried to tug my
wrists free. I wanted to undo him, to release him and feel his hardness
in my palm, but he growled. Edward wanted me laid out like a sacrifice
to the Gods. I wasn't going to deny him that, because it was turning me
on, and making my panties wetter than I had ever known.

He knew what I wanted, though, and transferred my wrists to one hand,
using the other to undo his trousers, and retrieve a silver packet from
the pocket. He'd thought of everything, but I was too far absorbed in the
moment to ask him about it now. I used my feet to push the fabric over
his ass and down his legs. It didn't surprise me to find he didn't have
any underwear on. It would have surprised me more if he did. I was
growing used to his nakedness, even though I would never admit it to
him.

He nestled himself comfortably above my pussy, and I could feel is
erection as it demanded entry. I wasn't denying it, but Edward wanted to
prolong this experience. It was as if he didn't quite believe it either.

Edward moved his mouth back to my neck, as he began to unbutton the
shirt, one handed. He cursed as he fumbled with the buttons, and I had
to bite back a laugh. Each little disc was sheer torture. I bit back the

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urge to scream for him to rip it open, because I liked the way he pinned
down my arms too much to want him to stop. He eventually splayed the
material and, thankfully didn't tease me by leaving my bra on. He
opened the front catch and licked a nipple languidly.

"Oh...Oh, yes," I purred.

"Good, BB?" he asked huskily.

I nodded, arching my back towards him. I wanted more. I didn't need to
ask, because he was in perfect harmony with my needs, and he closed
his lips around a nipple and sucked. His thumb was constantly
caressing my wrist softly. It was in complete contrast to the harshness
of his mouth, but showed me he was in control of his actions. Every now
and then I could hear little muffled words tumbling from Edwards's lips. I
couldn't understand what they were over the sound of the waves and
my thundering heartbeat.

I was panting, needing more, but wanting to prolong this moment all at
the same time. It was exquisite torture. His teasing of my nipples was
sending little sparks to my pussy, making me wetter by the minute. It
was getting uncomfortable. I'd never felt this turned on; this alive. I'd
always known with Edward it would be unlike anything I'd ever felt
before, but this was beyond comprehension. It was better than any
fantasy.

It was real.

I was wet, desperate and wanting. I gasped loudly as his tongue
swirled, and the words sprang from my lips before they registered in my
head.

"Please. I need you!"

"Oh, you have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that. Tell
me again!" he growled.

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"I need you," I whimpered, grinding my hips against his hard on.

He hissed and licked at my lips. I loved his tongue, and my imagination
would be running wild if I could form a decent thought. However, my
brain was a pool of arousal that would only respond to Edward.

He watched me, as his fingers cupped my breast. I sighed and moaned
for more. He rocked his cock across my sex, and hummed in desire.

The wind blew gently across us, making my sensitive body vibrate. I
didn't care about the sand, about Newton, or even if someone
happened to stumble upon us. I just needed him.

His index finger teased my navel, making slow delicious circles around
the outside and dipping quickly inside. His finger quickly became his
tongue, and he finally let go of my arms. I instantly reached for his head,
combing my fingers through his messy hair. The strands flicked against
my fingers, as his tongue did the same to my stomach.

I was going to explode. This was beyond intense.

"Need you," I panted again.

This time, he seemed in complete agreement, because he knelt
between my open thighs and slipped his fingers into the thin straps of
my thong panties. He toyed with them, before lifting my legs and sliding
them down, flinging them over his shoulder. I pressed my knees
together, needing some friction, but Edward thought I was hiding myself
from him. The noise that came from his chest was feral; a snarl, as he
pushed my thighs apart, and cupped my sex.

"Ungh..." was the only sound I could make.

A crooked smile formed on his lips. He liked me needy, and completely
incoherent.

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His finger slipped up and down my wet slit, making me shudder. I tried
to move my hips closer to his hand. I wanted his fingers inside of me,
but his grip was firm. I whined, making him chuckle.

"In good time," he laughed. "I can already see how ready you are for
me. So deliciously wet. So fucking amazing."

Nonsensical noises bubbled from my lips, and I reached for him,
wanting to pull him on top of me. I watched him tear at the condom
wrapper and sheath his erection swiftly, before lacing our fingers
together. His cock touched my molten pussy, and he swirled his hips,
making it glide against my heated clit. It was my turn to snarl, now. This
was too much. Edward knew it and suddenly grasped my hips, thrusting
his cock into me and filling me completely. I felt overwhelmed. This was
what I'd been waiting for.

What I'd been waiting for my whole adult life.

Whoever he'd been with before, whatever he'd indulged in up until now;
I knew the moment I sheathed his erection, he was all I ever wanted.
Even if he was to leave right now, and never come near me again, I
knew I'd never feel the same with any other man. We were made to fit
perfectly with each other. Edward Masen was the only one who could
truly fulfil me. He was like a missing piece of the puzzle that was my life.
Here with him everything slid into place. I felt happy, whole and alive.

Edward had waited for me, hoping one day I would return and feel the
same way about him, as he did for me. He'd had complete faith. I knew
now that I could deny him nothing. He was as important as the air I
breathed.

His soft mutterings were taken with the wind, as he pulled my hips
closer to him. He was still kneeling, and opted to pull me towards him,
rather than hover over me. He kept the lower part of my body elevated,
giving him full view of my aroused body. It also allowed him to watch as
his cock entered me. I'd never had sex in this position, and it stunned

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me just how erotic it was. My mind flew away, thinking of all the ways
we could pleasure one another. The ways I'd always dreamed of.

Edward's eyes appeared almost black as they focused on mine. His
long dark lashes cast shadows across his cheeks, giving him a sinister
edge. I gazed through hooded eyes, as he lifted his thumb to his mouth,
licking at it slowly, before pressing it to my needy clit.

"Christ, yes!" I yelled.

My scream of approval made him pump faster, and grip my hip tighter,
tugging my lower half closer to him. All the while his thumb massaged
my clit, making me groan and writhe against him. I'd never been this
wanton, nor would I be with anyone else. It all came back to Edward.

Only Edward.

I finally touched him. The only part I could. I cupped his sac and teased
the soft skin, feeling it contract under my fingertips. He moaned, and
slammed harder into me.

We both began to breathe rapidly, and I could feel my whole body begin
to buzz with electricity. My orgasm was building. I could sense Edward
was ready too. His thighs began slapping aggressively against me, as
he pounded into my body.

All it took was one final flick to my clit for me to scream out. My throat
hurt, I snarled so loudly. Every muscle in my abdomen tightened and
my toes curled in delight. It was amazing.

I felt Edward slow, before falling on top of me and burying his face into
my neck, growling softly. He pulsed inside of me, as his orgasm took
him into his own oblivion. It felt surreal, and it took several minutes
before I could think clearly.

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We lay entwined in each other's arms, listening to our breathing
regulate. We were both stunned by what had happened. I could feel it.
Even though he'd waited and wanted this, on some level I knew he
thought he'd never get it. That maybe I would never return.

I stroked his hair gently, and kissed the top of his head, trying to tell him
in actions, what I couldn't quite verbalize. I could feel his lips moving
against my breast, making me squirm. I'd never wanted sex
immediately after, never understood why people would need to, but I
was most definitely ready for more. It was building again, and it felt
strange to want him so soon after our completion.

"Are you OK?" I heard him whisper against my skin.

"OK isn't really the best description, but yes, I am."

He kissed a small path between my breasts, up my chest and nuzzled
my neck. It was taking some time for my heartbeat to regulate, and for
my head to assess what the hell had just happened. I didn't regret it. I
couldn't bring myself to regret something as fulfilling as that, but where
did we go from here? What were we supposed to do now?

Edward hadn't looked at me. He kept his head rested near my neck,
and placed little soothing pecks in it every now and then. Was he
thinking the same as me? Was he as confused? I could almost hear
Rose screaming at me to ask him, and stop wondering. I would get
nothing resolved by thinking. I needed to verbalize it.

"Edward?"

He remained silent, trying to distract me by licking at my erratic pulse. It
worked for a few seconds, as I squirmed and giggled against him.

"Edward, please?" I tried again.

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This time he lifted his head and fixed his gaze on mine. He looked
completely bewildered; just as shocked as I.

"I didn't mean to...I never intended...the condom..." I stopped his
ramblings by placing a finger across his wet swollen lips.

It was the first time I'd seen his calm, cocky facade shaken. He was
worried about my reaction to the condom.

"Do you really think I'm going to make an issue of you having a condom,
after what just happened between us?"

He didn't answer me, just gazed at me. It was beginning to scare me.
Did he now have what he wanted? Was he bored already? Had it all
been about the chase?

"Don't BB," he hissed against my finger. I moved it and cupped his jaw.
"I can almost hear your brain working overtime. I just need a short while
here. I meant it when I said you had no idea what this means to me."

I wanted to discuss it now, but I knew I'd get nothing from him, so I
combed my fingers through his hair, as he rested back on my chest and
replayed every second of what had happened between us. It had been
beautiful and I wanted more. More of Edward. More of Us.

I whined when he adjusted on top of me, but I realized pretty soon
afterwards that he was trying to be discreet in removing the condom.

He looked down at me, taking my breath away with the emotion dripping
from his eyes. He raised his hands, resting himself on his elbows and
cupped my face between his palms.

"BB, that was beyond anything I had ever imagined, and trust me, I've
imagined it a lot, but I want to apologize. I didn't come out here tonight
to foist myself upon you. I was honestly checking you were alright."

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"I don't accept your apology," I stated bluntly, but then softened with my
next words. "And I don't regret what just happened."

Edward pursed his lips, appearing as though he wanted to say
something but couldn't find the words.

"I can't believe I'm the one telling you this was unbelievable," I muttered,
close to tears. This wasn't how I'd expected this to go.

"Hey, I didn't say this wasn't incredible. It was so much more than I can
verbalize. I'm going to be honest, and tell you I'm a little shook up."

Before I could say anything further, he crashed his lips to mine. What he
couldn't say in words, he said with actions. He kissed me with
everything he had. It took my breath away, made me a useless lump of
jelly and had me grinding my hips towards his growing erection.

Newton barked loudly, snapping us from our post coital bliss.

"Come on," Edward whispered. "Let's go home."

He tugged me to my feet, completely oblivious to his nakedness. I
pulled the shirt around my body, covering myself quickly.

"Please don't be embarrassed. You're fucking stunning."

I giggled shyly, as I picked up my boots. I watched him as he pulled on
his trousers, leaving them unfastened. I could feel my body begin to
heat with arousal again. Just looking at his unbuttoned trousers and the
sprinkling of hair had me drooling. I mumbled about losing my panties,
not really sure he could hear me over the sound of the wind and the
waves.

"Fuck 'em. You shouldn't wear them anyhow. They only get in the way,"
he stated, wiggling his eyebrows.

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I grinned. He was back.

Edward held my hand and whistled at Newton. We walked back to the
house in silence. I knew we were both remembering what had
happened. It had hit us both hard. For Edward he'd wanted it for so
long, but now he had it; had me. He had to figure out what we did next,
and that was exactly what I was wondering. I'd never intended to meet
someone, but he felt right, and after my chat with Rose I knew I'd only
been denying myself possible happiness by ignoring Edward. I knew I
couldn't do that. The pull towards him was just too strong.

He ushered me into the house and took my boots from my hand. His
grin was devilishly sexy as he stalked towards me. A small giggle burst
from my lips as he gripped the sides of the shirt, and nuzzled my jaw
with his nose.

"You smell like me. Right here, at the base of your neck. It's driving me
crazy. Mine, BB, tell me you're mine."

He nipped at my lobe, and my legs buckled slightly. How could I have
denied myself this? One nip of his teeth, and I was ready for him. It was
the sort of chemistry I'd only read about.

"Please?" he moaned, almost begging.

Edward needed to hear this. He needed me to say it. It was important to
him.

I tilted my head and gazed directly into his intense green eyes.

"I'm yours, Edward."

He growled as his lips met mine. They moved across mine harshly, as
his tongue delved into my mouth forcefully. I was completely dominated
by Edward, it was unbelievable. I would never have thought this kind of
power would have aroused me, and maybe it wouldn't with anyone else.

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It was all about this one man.

"Can I take you to bed?" he whispered against my collarbone.

"Yes," I breathed as he licked along the bone.

He swept me up, and before I could truly comprehend what he was
doing, we were tumbling across the bed, both slightly breathless from
the kisses, and both giggling like children.

He cupped my face with his hand, stroking his thumb across my cheek.

"Can I stay in here tonight?"

I nodded, as he lay me down, and spooned behind me gently. He still
wore his trousers, and I still had his shirt on. His hand cupped my breast
and he began to fondle with my nipple. I could feel his breathing getting
heavy, and his arousal growing against my ass. I rocked against him,
making him hiss.

"Keep doing that and you'll be sorry," he muttered into my ear.

I shivered.

"I don't think I'll be sorry, if you plan to do what I hope you will."

"What's that?" he questioned.

I bit my lip, as he plucked roughly at my nipple. He needed me to tell
him.

"Erm...Do you have another condom?"

He snickered and ran the tip of his nose down the collar of my neck, as
his hand moved down from my breast towards the apex of my thighs.

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"Why would we need another one, BB?"

"Edward," I whined, moving my thigh slightly, giving him better access
to my needy center.

"Just tell me, and you can have it. I'd give you anything, all you have to
do is ask."

His fingers teased at my folds, spreading them gently before slowly
dipping a solitary finger into the wet heat. I moaned the instant he made
contact with my pussy.

"Edward," I gasped, as his finger swirled, "I want you again. Please."

He snorted and kissed my shoulder. I complained when he removed his
hand, but it was only so he could remove my shirt and get rid of his
trousers.

This time was just as heated, and as intense as the last. When he
entered me, I felt complete again. I knew my brain would want to
analyze every moment when I woke, but for now I made myself feel
rather than think. It was difficult when Edward was doing the most
delicious thing with his tongue.

I'd leave the scrutiny until we woke up. I was just going to enjoy Edward
for now.

Yeah, they finally did it! But where do they go from here?

For everyone wanting to know what's going on with E... its next...

I started a new fic...the prologue & chp1 are up now. It's called
TILT...link in my profile.

I'm selling myself for fandomgivesback (link in profile). I have 2 x
3k word one shots up for grabs. Check it out...

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Thanks you!

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13. Chapter 13: Memories

Thank you for all the amazing reviews. I'm so please you all
enjoyed the beach fun!

Major thanks to my betas - Maylin & Twirlgrrl. I love you guys.

Boob gropes to hunterhunting for prereading. Muah.

HUGE thank you to everyone who left me messages of love this
week. You know who you are, and why you needed to. I
appreciated it more than you could ever know.

SM owns all things Twilight.

EPOV

I stared at her incredulously as she slept. We'd done it, really done it,
and it was better and more amazing than I could have ever imagined. I
hadn't intended to start anything on the beach. I'd woken up and was
worried when I couldn't find her. She'd looked so lost and lonely sitting
on the sand, and I could tell she was analyzing every little moment of
our date. Scrutinizing it, and finding a reason to run from me. I couldn't
allow her to.

She meant too much to me.

I'd wanted to make our first time together special, and I was kicking
myself for my lack of self control. I'd taken her on the fucking sand! I
also hadn't exactly been gentle in the way I'd held her hands above her
head. I'd checked for marks or bruises when we got home, but Bella
assured me she was feeling perfectly fine. It didn't stop me berating
myself though.

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My inner chastisement soon disappeared when she said she wanted
me again. It hadn't been just the one time; she meant what she'd said
about being ready.

The second time had been much more heated, if that was even
possible. Her head had crashed against the headboard, as I pushed
myself into her. Bella had only whimpered for more. We'd fallen into an
exhausted heap on the bed shortly after ten AM, both too tired to move
from our embrace.

I couldn't move now. I was still completely stunned. I sent a silent thank
you to Aro, because he'd been right. My BB was where she should be,
naked, cuddled in my arms, and in our bed. I didn't have the words to
express my happiness.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Bella croaked, blinking rapidly to adjust to the
light.

I hadn't even noticed she was awake. I'd been watching my hand as it
caressed her arm.

"Nothing at all, BB. In fact, today is probably the happiest I've ever
woken up."

"You were frowning."

I skimmed my hand to her waist and tugged her closer. She
automatically entwined her legs with mine, and rested her palm flat
against my chest.

"I was thinking, and before you ask what about, I'll tell you. Us. I was
thinking about you and me."

"Should I be worried?" she asked playfully, but there was a slight edge
to her tone. Bella was scared.

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"No. I was replaying every last second of what's happened between us
since we left the club last night. I was remembering what it felt like to be
buried inside of you, while you sobbed my name."

"Don't say that, Edward."

"What?"

She pulled away slightly and sat up, tucking the sheet under her arms
and depriving me of her beautiful tits. I stayed silent, as she ran her
fingers through her hair and rested her elbows on her knees. She was
starting to analyze the situation again, and nothing good ever came of
that.

"Bella..."

"No, don't," she interrupted. "I'm sorry. I've never had anyone talk to me
in that way before. I don't know how to respond to it."

I bit back a smirk. Laughing at her would only make matters worse.

"Do you like it?" I whispered, bringing my lips closer to her ear.

I knew she liked me talking into it. She always shivered at my words. As
if proving my point, she shuddered slightly, but moved her ear closer to
my lips.

"Yes," she murmured.

"Then there isn't any need for you to snap at me, is there? BB, switch
off that fucking brain!" I tugged her back into my arms and grazed my
teeth down her neck, tantalizingly slowly. "Your neck just begs to be
bitten, do you know that?"

I heard her gulp audibly.

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"You seem to like biting. I'm surprised I'm not covered in your teeth
marks after this morning."

I stroked my hand up her leg, eliciting little moans of desire from Bella. I
continued to skim my teeth across her neck, as I gripped her thigh
roughly and pulled her legs open. She gasped, but I captured it with my
mouth and plunged my tongue inside. At the same time I pressed my
palm flat against her molten wet sex. Her hips ground into me
immediately.

I was amazed that she was so responsive to my touch. Her body was
willing to give me a chance. I slowly slipped a finger between her folds,
as her arm looped around my neck and teased the downy hair there. I
rested my chin on her shoulder, and watched as I pushed another finger
into her wetness. Bella groaned and whimpered for more.

Her toes curled, as I circled her clit with the pad of my thumb, spreading
her arousal across the sensitive flesh.

"Edward," she whimpered, rolling her hips towards my erection.

"Hmm?" I replied and flicked my tongue against her ear.

She ground her ass against my growing erection, making me want to
throw her down and fuck her into next week. However, this had to be
done right. Even though we'd had sex twice now, Bella was still very
timid about the situation. I had to tread carefully, so even though every
cell in my body protested, I removed my hand and kissed her tenderly
on the lips.

She whined and stared at me, confusion marring her beautiful features.
I knew I was being cruel and teasing her, but Bella always retreated
when things became too intense, and showing her exactly how often I
needed her was guaranteed to make her run.

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"Let's go eat. I want to show you something, too," I stated, climbing off
the bed.

She still looked bewildered by my change of mood, so I leaned back
down and kissed her harshly. I was amazed that she responded
immediately and tried to pull me back onto the bed. I chuckled and
shook my head.

"BB, I would like nothing better than to take you right now. The positions
running through my head right now are...interesting, to say the least, but
ask yourself this - are you ready for more? Not sex, but me?"

Bella licked her lips and brought the sheet back up to cover her body. I
felt like such a bastard, but I knew it was best for her this way. Maybe
later, after some time to talk, I could pick off where we left off.

I held my hand out to her, hoping she'd take it.

"Come on, I want to show you something. You'll like it. I promise."

"Will you be putting on some clothes?" she said shyly.

Christ, she was amazing.

"I'll put some sweats on, if it makes you feel any better." I smirked at
her, trying my best to make her smile. I hated to see her sad, especially
when I knew I was the one that caused it. "The real question is...Will
you be wearing anything?"

Laughter spilled from her pink lips, and she flushed slightly. We were
OK.

Bella climbed off the bed and tugged at the sheet, tucking it around her
body. I bit back a growl at the sight of her covered body. It was tempting
to just pull the thing clean off her, but again, I kept myself in check.

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"Shoo!" she demanded. "I'll meet you downstairs. I want coffee and
bagels. GO!"

Snorting loudly, I started to walk slowly from the room, making sure she
got an eyeful of my naked ass.

I'd set up the projector, and pulled the curtains closed. Her coffee and
bagel were growing cold on the coffee table. She must have been
having a shower, because she was taking her sweet time. I sat waiting,
desperately wanting to go upstairs and help her wash her back.

"What're we doing?" Bella's voice startled me out of my daydream
which included water, soap and a lot of fun.

"We, Ms Swan, are going to watch a home movie."

She shook her head, making her wet hair fly around her face.

"I will not watch porn with you, Edward. I can't even believe you're
suggesting it!"

"I didn't! Christ, Bella, it's a home movie of us as kids. Aro shot it years
ago. Why would I watch porn on a projector when I have a perfectly
good laptop and TV?"

She giggled nervously and apologized, before taking a seat on the
couch, and curling her legs underneath her. Handing her the coffee I'd
made, I sat down beside her.

"I was being stupid. Why on earth would you want us to watch porn?"

"Why?" I asked incredulously. "BB, why do you think? To turn you on.
To see the things that you enjoy, or even to see what you'd like to try.
Why is it odd that I'd want to watch porn with you?"

"I just...Well, I didn't...Hmm," she stuttered.

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"Interesting. You've never watched one, have you?"

A series of odd little noises came from her lips, as she tried to find
something to say. She eventually opted to say nothing. Bella was far too
amusing when she was flustered.

"Anyway..." I drawled, pulling her back against my chest. "Can we just
watch this?"

I leaned back and switched on the projector, it lit up the far wall, and a
blurry image of the house flashed up. I heard Bella gasp over the hum
of the machine.

"That's just how I remember this place! Oh my God, Edward, where did
you find this?"

I kissed the top of her head and explained the huge carton of films and
photo's I'd found after Aro had died. I knew she'd want to see them all
and promised her we'd go through it together. It would be nice for her to
see times when her Mother and Granddad had been happy.

The squealing of a little girl brought my attention back to the image on
the wall. I knew what was coming next. I'd watched this film more times
than I was willing to admit to. Somehow, when I felt lonely here, playing
this would make me feel closer to her. Now I had the real thing, in my
arms, kissing my fingers.

Doing what?

"BB," I warned.

She giggled and stopped the kissing. I felt her freeze the moment she
saw herself on the film. Seven year old Bella came racing across the
garden in her swimsuit, screaming playfully for help. I smiled
remembering the exact day this occurred.

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I remembered everything when it came to her.

While Bella watched the film, I watched her. She was completely awed
by what she was seeing. She laughed loudly when my younger form
appeared.

"Oh, Edward! You were so skinny. Look at your legs! They were like
strings with knots in the middle. This is just too funny!"

I lowered my lips to her ear, before speaking huskily.

"You have no room to talk. Look at you! Even then you were a terrible
tease."

"I was seven! Edward Masen, I wouldn't have known what the hell to do
with you back then."

"You don't know now," I stated, hoping I would get a rise from her.

She surprised me when she ignored my comment and went back to
watching the film. We were in the midst of a water fight, and I could hear
Aro yelling at us to keep the water away from the camera. The image
blurred and shifted as he moved from the spray. All the while our
childhood laughter filled the room.

"Are there any more? Maybe of Granddad?"

I could hear the sadness, as it oozed from her words. I just wished I had
something to offer her. I knew a film of Aro would make her happy, but
all I could give her was thirty seconds of footage in the middle of this
tape. At least it was something, and we still had a ton of photos to
plough through. I'd make her smile, I was certain.

"Keep watching."

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She grew silent, only a small smile teasing at the corners of her lips, as
she watched the rest of the footage desperate for a peak of Aro. She
giggled when I slipped on the wet, wooden steps and landed on my ass.
I recalled biting my lip to stop from crying at that moment. I didn't want
Bella to see me cry. She'd think I was a baby.

Her audible intake of breath told me the instant Aro appeared. She
leaned forward and studied the blurry image projected on the wall. I
swallowed the emotion swimming inside of me when she reached out,
trying to touch what simply wasn't there.

I reached out and took her hand in mine, pulling her back to my body.

"Bella, it's OK. I'm just sorry we don't have more," I said solemnly.

"Are you sure? I mean, have you checked all the boxes?"

Her eyes were glassy, as they began to fill with tears. I didn't want to
see my BB cry.

I cupped her face in my hand, and stroked her lower lip with my thumb,
dipping it inside a little to skim her teeth.

"I'm sorry," I replied, shaking my head.

I felt her lip tremble under my fingertip, and I couldn't bear it. I brought
my mouth to hers and kissed her with everything I had. She gripped my
wrist tightly. I didn't know if she was holding me close or keeping me at
arm's length; that was until she began to kiss me back with abandon.
My hand travelled down to her waist, pulling her closer to me, as she
whimpered against my tongue.

I had only intended to make her feel better, but those sounds were
making my cock spring to attention, and demand to be taken care of.

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Bella had initiated very little between us, so when she moved her hand
to the edge of my sweats and skimmed a finger along the elastic, I
almost came. It nagged at the back of my mind that maybe this was just
her way of getting comfort when she felt sad, but I couldn't turn her
down. I wanted her, and was willing to take what she could offer me,
after all last night hadn't been about comfort.

I lapped at her lips, and took her lower one between my teeth. She
hissed and opened her eyes. They were no longer tearful. Her pupils
had dilated in excitement and her breathing was accelerated.

I had to have her.

I began kissing along her jaw and nuzzling her neck. She hummed and
tilted her neck, exposing the porcelain flesh. I wanted to bite it; to mark
it and make her mine, but settled for luxurious open mouthed kisses
instead.

Bella straddled my hips, thrusting her breasts into my face. My mouth
watered for a taste of her. I could see her erect nipples jutting against
the fabric of her tank. It was far too enticing, so I took the nipple
between my teeth, and suckled her through the material. She purred
and combed her fingers through my hair, before tugging on it.

"Fuck!" I snarled into her tits.

She looked down at me, her eyes glittering with pure lust. I crashed my
mouth to hers and devoured her, skimming her teeth with my tongue
and sliding it against hers. I pulled at the top she was wearing,
desperate to remove it. Bella leaned back slightly and ripped it over her
head, and my hand instantly shot up to cup her bare breasts.

All the while I could hear the projector whirring and the sounds of our
younger selves giggling.

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Her fingers began to tease the waistband of my sweats again, tickling at
the hairs on my lower abdomen, and skimming across my covered
cock.

"Bella! Here? Now?" I ground out.

It didn't really matter what her answer was. I wanted her, and I couldn't
hold out for that much longer.

She rolled her hips slowly, bringing her mound close to my cock. I
wouldn't accept her teasing, so gripped her ass cheeks with both my
hands and pulled her harshly to me, aligning her pussy right over my
erection. It was sheer bliss; except for the material of our pants getting
in the way. It was taking every ounce of self control I had not to rip them
from her body. I needed to feel her naked flesh against mine.

The projector whined to a stop, leaving us in relative silence. The
pounding of my heart seemed louder, as she dipped her fingers and
took hold of my erection. Her grip was so soft and cautious, it brought
back memories of the morning she'd ran off to Rose's, when I'd shown
her how I liked to be held. If I did it now would she balk again?

I whispered her name, but she only hummed in response. Her eyes
were closed again, and I was growing to hate it. I wanted her looking at
me when we did this. I didn't want her hiding from me.

"Stand up!" I demanded.

Her eyes shot to mine, wide with panic, but she was smiling. Bella was
beginning to like this side of me. I jutted my chin out at her, and
growled, "Take them off."

She looked down at her pink yoga pants, as if weighing up her options. I
gave them to her straight.

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"I won't take them off. Remove them yourself, in front of me, or I don't
touch you." I lowered my voice before continuing. "Remember how it felt
to have my fingers circling your clit, BB?"

Her cheeks tinged pink at my words, and her legs buckled slightly. She
was turned on by the way I spoke to her. We were definitely making
progress.

I gazed at her, as she pushed her thumbs into the top of her pants and
slowly shimmied them down her thighs. She kicked the fabric away,
standing uncomfortably before me. Her hand tried to cover her pussy.

"Don't. I told you on the beach how fucking beautiful you are. Don't ever
hide it from me."

"I just..."

"I know. I do understand that," I assured her, before saying softly,
"Come here."

She climbed back onto my lap, and as she spread her thighs I could see
her glistening pussy. I groaned, making her giggle.

"I think we need a condom, because there isn't a chance in hell you're
getting away from me now."

"I don't want to be away from you," she muttered shyly.

She was utterly fucking adorable.

I moved her torso to the side, pulling out a drawer in the cabinet beside
the couch and retrieving a box of condoms. She scowled at me.

"I think we need to talk about the condoms. You seem to have them
very handy."

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"Are you complaining?" I asked bluntly, rolling her nipple between my
thumb and finger.

She suddenly became speechless. I took the opportunity to pull a foil
square from the box and place it on the arm of the couch. My mouth
descended onto her tit, my teeth taking over from my hand, because it
was busy, swiftly moving to her pussy. I needed to feel her wet heat.

Bella yelped, as I nipped at her pert bud, at the same time delving my
fingers between her slit. She was wet and ready for me. I could take her
now with ease. I licked across her breasts and up her neck to her lips,
where I whispered against them.

"Put the condom on me, BB."

Her hand shook, as she took the silver packet and tore it open. I raised
us a couple of inches off the couch, so I could move my sweats down
further. Then used my feet to drag them to my ankles, and eventually,
off me completely. By then, Bella had hold of my dick and was
nervously trying to roll the condom on.

"You have to look at it to get it on, you know?" I said sarcastically.

She sighed. "I haven't..."

"Christ, what breed of fuckwit did you have sex with Bella? My body is
hard because it wants you. I want you!"

She whined slightly at my words. She wanted me just as badly, so I
covered her hand with mine, and sheathed my cock. Before she had a
chance to protest I lifted her up, and entered her as I lowered her down.

We both gasped in wonder. The connection was intense and if possible,
so much more than before. She clutched at my shoulders, as I held onto
her hips, and we began to rock slowly. She still wouldn't really look at
me, so I cupped her chin and made her.

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"Bella. I'm here. No hiding," I uttered.

She gave a small nod before kissing me. The way she leaned forward
altered the angle, making me hiss as it tilted my cock, pushing it further
into her. Her tongue swirled in my mouth, mirroring her hips. I gripped
tightly onto her ass, and pulled her harshly and quickly towards me,
thrusting upwards as I did. She moaned and demanded more. Just the
words leaking from her swollen lips made me pound harder.

She wanted more.

My fingers dug into her buttocks, guiding her movements and setting
the pace. Fast and frenzied. I needed her; needed to feel her come
around me. If this was the only way she could seek comfort right now,
then I was prepared to offer it.

"Unf, Edward...I..." she panted.

I pulled tighter on her buttocks, as she rode me hard. Her tits were
wobbling tantalizingly in my face, and I nipped at them whenever they
came close enough. My skin began to tingle with the thin sheen of
sweat that was filming my skin. She pulled on my hair harshly, making
me smile. I knew there was a tiger in there somewhere. I just had to find
out what could unleash it completely.

"Fuck! You look fucking hot riding me now, BB," I uttered.

She grinned wildly at me and raised her arms to hold her hair up from
her body. It lifted her tits and made her body elongate. She writhed so
seductively, my abdomen tightened in need. I knew holding out wasn't
an option. I simply had to make this woman come around me.

I tickled my fingers around her waist and down towards her pussy. I was
spurred on by her chuckles. She was getting so much more comfortable
with me. Maybe the tiger would play soon.

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"Edward," she begged.

"Yes?" I whispered against her chest.

I could see goose bumps appearing on her skin. She was nearing her
completion; it only made me want her more. I sat up, my back away
from the couch, and lowered her torso onto the coffee table. Her hips
still rocked against me, showing me she was beyond caring what
position we were in. I ran my hand slowly across her collarbone, down
between her breasts and across her stomach. All the way to her wet,
wanting pussy.

As I pushed into her fiercely I watched her chest rise and fall rapidly. It
was a complete turn on to see her laid out before me. I growled and
stroked her clit gently, before pushing on it with the pad of my thumb.

"Oh...Oh...EDWARD!"

She clamped around my cock and slowed her movements as she came.
She wanted to prolong the orgasm, which interested me. She knew to
slow down to get what she wanted. Bella wasn't completely innocent
when it came to taking matters into her own hands, or rather fingers.
The image in my head of Bella pleasuring herself in front of me, tipped
me over the edge, and I let out a guttural groan, as I released into the
condom; into her.

I slouched over her gasping torso. We were sticky with sweat, and both
lost in our euphoria. It was perfect. I could hear the heavy pounding of
her heart underneath my ear. I could stay like this forever, just hearing
how her body responded to mine.

She was made for me.

Mine. Just as Aro said she would be.

"Ouch," she said softly.

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I looked up to see her wincing and trying to move.

"Are you OK? Did I hurt you? Christ, I'm sorry, honey."

She cocked her brow at the endearment. I'd never called her anything
but BB. It slipped, but I liked it. I helped her up and tried to remove the
condom discreetly. She turned her back to me asking me to take a look.

"Oh, damn! It looks like I caught you on the corner of the table. It's red
and a little cut, but it's nothing serious. Are you all right?"

"I'm fine. It smarts a bit, but I'll be good. I asked for it, remember?" she
stated, smiling shyly.

I adored the fact that we'd just had sex in the living room, across the
coffee table, but now she chose to be coy with me. I pulled her
backwards against me, hearing a slight hiss as the cut connected with
my chest. I adjusted our bodies to get her more comfortable and kissed
the shell of her ear.

I'd lain on this couch and dreamed so many times of being like this with
her. It was still shocking to see it all come to fruition.

I caressed her arm, watching my hand as it ghosted across her creamy
flesh. The projector was still whirring, trying to play a film that had come
to the end. As if reading my thoughts, Bella asked softly, "Can we watch
it again. Please?"

"Of course. How about I go and make us another drink, and then I'll put
it on. Do you need some lotion on your back too?"

"Woah! Where the hell did you put Edward? Drinks? Lotion?" she
laughed, prodding my chest with her finger.

I grasped hold of it and brought it to my lips, sucking it in slowly. My
tongue swirled around the tip, as her eyes went dark with desire. A

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small cry slipped from her mouth, before closing her eyes to enjoy the
sensation.

Christ, I could never get enough of this woman. Just sucking her finger
made her needy for me again.

Bella slid her finger out and kissed me tenderly on the lips, before
spoiling it all by slapping my chest and telling me to move.

I snorted and shifted her slightly, allowing me to stand. I turned to go to
the kitchen, when I heard her gasp.

"Edward, your tattoo!"

I smirked. I wondered how long it would be before she really saw what it
said. I knew she would be full of questions when she did. I turned my
head, taking in her shocked expression.

"Yes?"

"I...What does it say?"

I raised my brows at her. "You can read it."

"Edward, I want you to tell me," she breathed.

I took a deep breath and opened my mouth, intending to say what she
wanted, but I stopped the moment I heard the horn of a car outside.
There was only one person who had a horn like that. It was stupid, like
a fucking clown car. My stomach sank.

Alice was here.

OH NOES!

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Please check the link on my profile to the fandomegivesback
auctions. I'm hooring myself out.

Also, the voting has opened for In The Dark. If you liked my one
shot Dark Possession - then go vote at: http:/
www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2003775/Darkward_In_The_Dark

THANK YOU!

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14. Chapter 14: Secrets

Thanks to everyone reading and reviewing. You guys are amazing.

Love to my awesome betas- Maylin & Twirlgrrl. MUAH!

Thanks to hunterhunting for prereading.

lamorducache - this is for you! The only person to guess who Alice
was!

SM owns all things Twilight.

Alice was here.

BPOV

The horn blared outside, startling me from my post coital Edward haze.
It was late Sunday afternoon and I wasn't expecting anyone. I stared at
Edward, a glimmer of recognition flickered across his face. He appeared
to know who it was.

"Edward?"

He handed me my yoga pants and top, before quickly pulling on his
sweats. I dressed and tried to get his attention, but he wouldn't look at
me, and the conversation about his tattoo was forgotten.

"Edward! Who is it? Look at me!" I demanded.

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He ran is hands in frustration through his hair and grimaced. I could
hear heels clicking on the wooden porch, moments before a key was
slotted into the door.

"It's Alice," he said quickly, as if that gave me an answer.

The door flung open, and shortly after a voice chimed, "Why is it so
fucking dark in here?"

A tiny woman with raven black hair stood in the doorway. She smiled
warmly at Edward and dropped her bag to the floor, before launching
herself at him. He huffed as she wrapped her legs around his waist, and
kissed him quickly on his lips.

I gasped, who the hell was she? Why was she kissing him?

A wave of jealousy washed over me. I wanted to wrench her off him. I'd
just moments ago been having sex with him across the coffee table,
and now some other woman was mauling him.

"Lay off me, woman!" Edward shouted, but he was laughing.

She clambered down and smoothed her red dress. She'd still to
acknowledge me, and it was beginning to get on my nerves.

"How's it going?" she asked, holding his hand.

I gritted my teeth, as my blood began to boil.

"I'm great. What the hell are you doing here? France not sedate enough
for you, Ali?"

France?

"I decided to come home for a while. I missed this place, along with
your ugly mug! Besides, Mom's off travelling again. India this time."

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Home? Here?

I cleared my throat loudly, hoping someone would actually pay attention
to me. Edward's grin was sheepish as he looked at me. Alice merely
giggled.

"Sorry Sweetie! I was caught up seeing this hottie. Too dazzled by his
beauty to notice you."

"Shut it, Alice!" Edward snorted.

She pranced towards me and held out her hand, waiting for me to
shake it. Her blue eyes pierced mine, reminding me of someone, but I
couldn't quite place who.

I cautiously shook it, pursing my lips and waiting for some sort of
introduction.

"What've you guys been doing in the dark?" She wiggled her eyebrows
teasingly. "Has he been trying to corrupt you with his extensive film
collection?"

"We were watching the old tapes." Edward mumbled.

"Oh! The ones of Dad? Can I watch them with you? You know I adore
them."

I stood up sharply, glaring from one to the next.

"Will someone tell me who the hell she is, and what's going on? Why do
you have a key to my house?"

"Your house?" Alice gasped.

Edward moved to stand between us, sensing the growing unrest. He
placed his hand on my cheek, looking at me intensely. "I think you need

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to sit down, BB."

"BB? Oh, my God! You're Bella! The Bella! Wow!"

I frowned and nodded. She was making my head spin. I simply couldn't
understand what was happening. My body was still humming from my
antics with Edward, and I couldn't get my brain to function correctly. I
felt like I was missing a huge part of the puzzle.

"Alice, can you do me a favor? Can you please leave us alone for a little
while?" Edward asked.

"Why?"

His words were hushed, but I didn't miss them. "She doesn't know
about you."

"Who are you?" I hissed.

Edward opened his mouth, but it was Alice who spoke first.

"I guess technically I'm your aunt. I always did find it amusing that my
niece was older than me. It's so good to finally meet you. I always
thought..."

"Alice!" Edward interrupted. "Please! She doesn't know."

I slumped onto the couch, my stomach churning. All the puzzle pieces
swam in my head, trying to connect. She'd mentioned France, and her
dad, this place was her home and she treated Edward like a brother. I
thought about the familiarity I felt when I looked into her eyes, and
understood.

They were Aro's eyes looking back at me.

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She was his daughter. She was my mother's sister, and therefore my
aunt.

"BB, are you OK? You're sheet white. Talk to me." Edward asked
urgently.

I could feel his warm palm against my cool cheek, as he continued to
ask that I talk to him. I couldn't form the words. Clearly my mother had
known about Alice, and that had been who she was referring to the day
I'd been eavesdropping. It wasn't Edward who was the 'odd little child'. It
was Alice. She'd said that about her own sister.

I vaguely heard Alice mention Newton, and the beach, before the door
banged closed.

I felt suffocated. I couldn't breathe; completely confused by the
situation, and yet it all made perfect sense.

"Speak, BB. Please?" he whispered again.

"You knew," I stated.

He moved to sit next to me, trying to cuddle me close, but I remained
rigid.

"Yes, I knew, but I never realized you'd been left in the dark until you
asked me about France. I was going to raise it with you. I just didn't
know how, or even when to. It's also not something I should have been
left to deal with. Your mother should have told you this! Christ, I'm sorry
it turned out this way."

My eyes met his. He looked so sad, and concerned. His thumb stroked
my cheek softly, trying desperately to make me feel better. Edward was
right, this shouldn't have been left for him to tell me, but right now he
was all I had.

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"I want to know," I breathed.

He sighed and brought my head to his chest, sitting back carefully on
the couch.

"Tell me you're OK. I can't stand the thought of hurting you, or you
thinking I played a part in this."

"It's not your fault. Please?"

I could hear the erratic beat of his heart, as he took a deep breath and
started the story.

"Heidi is Alice's mom. She's never been one to stay in the same place
for too long, and in truth, Alice is very similar. Your grandmother died
years before Aro met Heidi, so it's not like an affair or anything. She
was younger, in fact, only a year older than Renee. Your mom
disapproved, calling it disgusting and issuing Aro an ultimatum. Aro tried
to assure her that it was only comfort and companionship, but Renee
was repulsed and refused to change her mind. Even more so when
Heidi became pregnant with Ali. That was the last summer you visited,"
he whispered sadly and kissed the top of my head.

He was silent for a while, and I was about to prompt him, when he
continued.

"Your mother refused to speak to Aro after that, even when Heidi and
Alice left for France. There was never any talk of marriage between
them. They knew what kind of relationship they had, even with Alice in
the picture."

I tried to digest it all, but it all seemed so surreal.

"Heidi was never going to stay, and it was always clear she would take
Ali with her wherever she went. They never lived with Aro, and as far as
I know, never resumed their relationship after she was born. They kept

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in contact after the move, and Alice would come to stay in the summer.
Aro loved having her home. That's why we're so close. She's like a
sister to me. I know I have Charlie, but I feel so much closer to Alice.
That's all I know, remember I was young when this all occurred. Aro told
me most of it. It always upset him that your mother never forgave him."

My first thought was to call my mom. I wanted confirmation, but just
looking at Alice, and trusting Edward as I did, I knew it was true. All the
dots connected.

"Why didn't Aro leave the house to my mom, or Alice? Why me?"

"He didn't want it to look like he was choosing one daughter over the
other. Even though your mom decided never to speak to him again, he
still loved her. You were the next choice. He wanted it to stay in the
family, and he knew you'd care for it like he did. Aro always knew you'd
come back here, to the house and to me."

Edward tilted my chin upwards, so he could really look at me. I knew he
wanted to see that I was doing OK, but I hadn't had enough time to take
it all in.

"Things make so much more sense now."

"Forgive me?"

"There's nothing I need to forgive you for. It wasn't your place to have to
tell me, but I'm a little peeved you left it until she arrived! Did you know
she was coming?" I questioned.

"No. Alice does this. She just turns up when she's bored elsewhere."

I could hear the love for her in his tone. What was I going to do with
her? I couldn't treat her like she really was my aunt, she was younger
than me. I gasped, realizing something important.

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"Edward, she can't stay here. Where will she sleep?"

A sexy little smirk played on the corner of his lips, as he lowered his
head and spoke against my mouth.

"She can stay on the couch, because I plan on being next to you. That
bed is far too big for you, and I wouldn't want you catching a chill. I need
to be close to you."

I was about to protest, when he kissed me, making all thoughts
dissipate. He knew just how to distract me. His teasing little tongue
would clear my head the instant it entered my mouth. He pulled me
closer to his body, holding me tightly. He was shaken by what he'd had
to tell me, and now he was trying to make me feel better, trying to make
sure we were OK.

I looped my arm around his neck, and he pushed me backwards. Before
I could catch my breath I was on my back, Edward hovering over me
smiling. He was such a horny fool. Even in the midst of this turmoil he
could still make me forget everything around us, and just be with him.

Everything was still so new with us, and I'd yet to analyze exactly how I
felt about what happened on the beach, and back here at the house. I
was swept up in a tidal wave of circumstances at the moment and my
only help was Edward.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, BB."

"Stop. Please. Can we just take five? I need to forget, Edward."

He rubbed his nose against mine and replied, "I'll do whatever you ask.
Anything. I'm yours."

"Alice knew who I was when you called me BB," I stated, hoping for
some elaboration.

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Edward grinned, before skimming the tip of his nose along my jaw and
back up to place a chaste kiss on my chin.

"Of course she did. I only ever refer to you as BB. I'd be surprised if she
calls you anything other than that. I think I've only ever heard her say
your name once or twice. We even got Aro saying it."

"I feel like I've been a part of a whole different life, but I was never
actually there. Does that make sense?" I said wistfully, as I smoothed
my hands up the muscles of his naked back.

He exhaled softly, giving out a little hum of pleasure as he did.

"You've always been a part of my life. I could never forget you."

"This is all so confusing. I don't know what's real anymore," I sighed.

"Then let me show you."

His lips met mine in a hungry, heated kiss. At the same time his hand
travelled down my body to hitch my thigh over his hip. I knew he was
distracting me again, trying to ease my pain, but in reality I had to deal
with that. I'd have to talk to Renee.

Thirty seconds after our lips connected, Alice returned. She opened the
door and Newton bounded in, jumping on top of us.

"Down!" Edward bellowed.

The dog whined and lay on the floor. I snorted, thinking how much
Edward would like everyone to do as he said so easily. He kissed my
nose before sitting up, bringing my back to his chest and wrapping his
arm across my stomach.

Alice glanced at me cautiously.

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"Did he tell you?" she asked softly.

"Hey! I'm here." Edward protested, and I giggled when Alice waved his
comment away.

She was certainly going to make things interesting. It looked like he'd
met his match with her. She didn't take any of his heavy handed
bullshit.

"Yes."

Alice moved to sit on the edge of the coffee table, facing us. I felt
Edward's arm pull tighter around me, trying to protect me from
something he wasn't able to; the truth.

"We've met once, you know? You came here with Renee to return some
things to Dad. While they were arguing on the porch you went to play on
the swing. I was already there, hiding. We only talked for a couple of
minutes before Renee pulled you away. Do you remember?"

I frowned and shook my head.

"Sorry, Alice, I don't."

She looked hurt, but there was no point lying to her.

I could feel Edward breathing against my ear, and it was making me
squirm. How could he arouse me when my world had tilted on its axis? I
had been excluded from so much information, and here he was, turning
me on by breathing! Was I really that shallow? I'd never been that
person with Tyler, but everything was so different with Edward.

"Do you have anything to ask me?"

Christ, this was uncomfortable. I didn't know what to say. I was only just
digesting everything. I didn't really think she could help with any

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questions I had, anyway. She'd been away most of the time. Granddad
had been here with Edward. Alone.

Had everyone abandoned them?

My heart ached at the image of a younger Edward waiting on the porch.
Waiting for me to arrive, though I never did. He'd told me on so many
occasions that he'd waited for me, and that I was a part of his life. Rose
had only clarified those points further, but was it really possible to want
someone you didn't know?

A blush crept up my cheeks, as I realized I was thinking about Edward,
and not the woman sitting in front of me. He was beginning to consume
me. I should be scared, because I was certain I wasn't that kind of
person, but with him it felt natural. I was happy to sit here in his arms. I
felt safe, happy and wanted. It didn't feel like an illusion.

"I don't know what to say to you. I knew nothing about you, and I feel at
a disadvantage because you all knew about me, and talked about me a
lot it seems."

I elbowed Edward gently in the stomach, making him chuckle softly in
my ear.

"Aro didn't want to forget about you, nor did a certain someone else,"
she smiled at Edward. "I see you two have finally lived up to Aro's
expectations."

"We're...erm..." I stuttered, trying to find the words.

"We're getting to know each other, Ali. Back off." Edward answered.

"OK!" she giggled, holding her hands up in surrender.

I shuffled on the couch, trying to move, but Edward's hold was tight.

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"I think I need to call my mom. I'll just be out on the porch."

He begrudgingly let me go, but handed me a blanket, telling me it was
cold outside. Alice remained silent, just assessing me from her seat on
the table. I'm sure they'd talk about me while I was gone, but that wasn't
what bothered me. I was trembling with dread at the thought of
speaking to my mom about this, but had very little choice. I needed this
out in the open after being hidden for so long.

Edward kissed my fingers, before I let myself outside and sat on the
small bench. I took a deep breath and dialed my mom. I felt nauseous
and my pulse was racing. How the hell was I going to bring this up? I
couldn't really say 'Hi, I just met your sister.' I didn't see that going down
too well with her. Then again, nothing about this situation was going to
go down well with her. She'd kept it hidden, because she was ashamed
and didn't want me to know, or at least that's what I assumed.

I was worried she wasn't going to answer, when she finally picked up.

"Isabella?"

"Hey, Mom."

"So you're talking to me now, are you? The last time I called, it cut off
and you didn't call me back," she moaned.

I rolled my eyes, knowing I would have to take her crap, before I could
actually raise anything with her. She droned on about common courtesy
and respect for one's mother. I didn't hear most of it, just the odd
pertinent word. I was about to yell into the receiver and tell her to shut
the fuck up, when she asked, "You're not listening to me, are you?"

"I am. It's just that you could have tried to call me. Why is it always me
that has to contact you?"

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"Courtesy, Bella. If you'd been listening, you would have heard me say
that," she replied petulantly.

We were getting nowhere fast, and if I didn't say something soon the
conversation would eventually annoy me enough to end the call.

"Mom, I need to talk to you. Can we set the other stuff aside for now?"

I heard her sigh into the phone. It made the line crackle and pop.

"You're not happy are you? The house is too much, you can't handle it
and want to come and stay with me. Is that right? Bella, you're a big girl
now, and I think it's time for you to stand..."

"I met Alice today," I interrupted, cutting off her rant.

The line went deathly silent.

I was about to explain further, when she finally spoke.

"Alice who?"

"Seriously, Mother? You're going to play that card? Christ, what the hell
is wrong with you?" I raised my voice, irritated that she would not only
lie to me, but deny knowledge of her sister.

It made me sick to my stomach. She mumbled incoherently, and I was
desperate to end the call, but I wanted answers from her. If I ended the
call now I didn't think she'd answer another one from me anytime soon.
She'd know what it was about.

"Oh, that Alice? You took me by surprise. Why is she there? Make sure
you tell her it's your house, and she has no rights to it!"

"Wait! I'm not even going to get started on the house. I want to discuss
Alice. You have a sister? One you kept a secret from me. What the

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hell? You need to tell me why, because I'm honestly ready to put this
phone down and never talk to you again. You lied to me!"

"I did not lie! I resent that accusation!" she snarled. "The little freak is
not my sister. I have no sister, and if she thinks she's come back to get
her claws into the house, then she is very much mistaken. I will fight her
all the way."

I rested my forehead on the table and wrapped the blanket tighter
around me. This was not going to end well. Arguing with her never did,
because she would never admit to being wrong. I couldn't see her
opening her arms to Alice after all this time. She hated her, based on
her opinion of what Granddad did. It was crazy.

"She doesn't want the house." At least I didn't think she did. "Look,
Mom, I'd really like an explanation. Can't you just talk to me about this?
What happened, and why won't you talk to Alice? Edward seems really
close to her, and..."

"EDWARD!" she screeched. "Edward is still there? I thought the lawyer
had dealt with that little waif. I hope he isn't bothering you. You can get
injunctions for that kind of thing."

I tried three times to interrupt her, but to no avail. She continued to
ramble on about just how horrendous both Edward and Alice being here
was. By the time I heard gold digger and Edward in the same sentence,
I'd reached the end of my rope. She couldn't possibly expect me to
listen to her ramble on about money, when I'd just found out I had an
aunt; a member of my family I knew nothing about. Edward wasn't
interested in what the house was worth. He didn't need to tell me that
for me to know. I felt it. I just knew he wasn't like that. Those words
were the final straw. I shouted into the phone, telling her to shut up. The
line went dead and moments later the tone rang loud in my ear.

My mother had hung up on me.

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I bit back tears. Why wouldn't she explain it to me? My mother was
never the easiest person to get along with. She was dismissive and rigid
in her expectations, but this side was something new, something mean.
I didn't like it. If I wanted more of an explanation from her, I'd have to go
and see her face to face. That way she couldn't ignore me.

I shuddered at the thought. It wouldn't be pretty, but I could see no other
way. She wouldn't answer any of my calls now. I knew my mother.

I stayed on the porch, taking the time to calm down, and think
everything through. I'd only been here a short time, and yet my life had
been changed irrevocably. There was no going back from the truth.

From Alice.

From Edward.

When I'd started off on this journey I'd expected my life to alter. I'd
wanted it too, but nothing could have prepared me for Edward, or the
discovery of Alice. Even having someone like Rose to talk to, was a
revelation. The new people in my life were the ones I'd always dreamed
of having. They were caring and supportive, but that didn't make this
any less scary.

I wiped my face, not even noticing I'd begun to cry. I needed to talk to
Edward. I'd have to go and visit Mom to sort this out. I really didn't want
to, but I had very little choice now. Why was nothing straight forward for
me? My marriage had been a sham, my new life was beyond what I
could've imagined, and my inheritance had turned out to be more than
just a house. It seemed Edward was part of it. I wished Granddad was
here to talk to, but if he was then chances are, I wouldn't be. I'd been
silly and in not wanting to get on the wrong side of my mother, I'd never
come to visit as I got older.

I swallowed down my regret, as I entered the house. Neither Edward,
nor Alice was in the living room, but I could hear hushed whispers from

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the kitchen. I walked tentatively towards the door. I knew nothing good
ever came from eavesdropping, but I'd never had a chance to see
Edward with his guard down, if he even had one. Or with someone who
meant as much to him as Alice. His relationship with Emmett and Rose
was one thing, but Alice was like a sister.

"You still should have told me you were coming, Ali." Edward
whispered.

"How was I to know she'd finally come back? I was only expecting to
find you, and maybe the local tart. Christ, Edward, I don't know what to
say to her! She's been a part of this family and yet, she hasn't. I can
understand why she's so fucking confused. You need to tread carefully.
I know you, and I know how you feel about her, but if you're not careful
you'll scare her away."

"I'm trying, OK? But it's really fucking difficult. I want to lock her in this
house and never let her leave again. Ali, my whole world is sitting out
on that porch, hurt and needing comfort. It's killing me that I was a part
of that pain. I thought it was Christmas when I woke up to see her
staring down at me. I wondered if it was a dream, but no dream could
be that good. Every single second of the day I have to remind myself
not to touch her too much, not to kiss her too intensely, and not to get
down on my knees and beg her to stay. Alice, I am being as careful as I
can be!" he hissed.

My heart melted. I was better than a dream to him? Was that even
possible when he didn't know me? On some level I should feel a little
scared, but it warmed me, pushing away the harshness of my mother's
chill.

"I'm only telling you to be cautious, don't be pissy with me!"

"I'm sorry," he sighed.

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I heard shuffling, followed by a quick kissing sound, making me think he
was hugging her. They were very affectionate, but even from what little
I'd witnessed, I could tell it was platonic. To them, they were siblings.

"Are you staying? BB's worried about where to put you. I was going to
tell her you'd sleep in that mess of a van of yours, but is the couch fine
with you? It's not like it's the first time you've slept there."

"Eww, yeah, I remember what I found on there last time!" she moaned.

I smiled, knowing what she probably found on that couch.

"Hey, I cleaned it! BB, made me," he said sheepishly. I could picture his
face when he said it; like a little boy caught stealing cookies from the
jar.

It had bothered me what little I knew about him, but didn't every
relationship start off that way? He knew no more about me, than I did
him. He was just more confident about us. I knew I should stop being
nosey and walk into the kitchen, but I couldn't help myself. I wanted to
know so much more about them, and they were being so candid. I
leaned against the wall and continued to listen.

"So," Edward enquired. "Your mom's travelling? What about Laurent?"

"What about him? I told you months ago that was over! He's a dick.
Please Edward, drop it."

"I'm just worried, like you are about me."

I took that as my cue to enter. They were hugging, Alice had her back to
me, and Edward pulled away smiling at me. However, his eyes oozed
concern.

"How did it go?"

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I was holding it together perfectly well, until he asked that. His voice full
of worry. I stared at him, feeling my eyes begin to well with tears. My
lower lip wobbled, as I said, "She hung up on me. She wouldn't even
acknowledge Alice."

He moved past Alice and swept me into his arms. I let go and sobbed
into his chest.

"BB, I'm sorry," he whispered into my ear.

His sympathy only made me cry more. I knew it wasn't just the
argument with my mom I was crying about. It was the shock of finding
out about Alice, and also the emotions from being with Edward, all
combining and finally getting their release. I felt overwhelmed by
everything and couldn't stop the tears. My chest heaved as I clutched at
his bare chest.

Alice was stroking my arm, and Edward crooned words of comfort, but it
didn't soothe. It only made me cry more. These two people were
consoling me, when it should have been my mom. She should have
been telling me about the past, and about why she hated them so
much. Instead, they were the ones helping me.

"Edward, take her upstairs and talk to her. I don't think me being here is
helping. I'll amuse myself for a while."

Edward placed his arm underneath my knees and picked me up,
cradling me in his arms. He took me upstairs to the bedroom and laid
me gently down on the bed. I turned away from him, ashamed at my
outburst, but he crawled onto the mattress with me and spooned behind
my body. His care only caused more tears, more emotion to spill. I was
a wreck. I'd known for a long time something would finally break my
façade. A person can only pretend for a short while before they snap.

This was my breaking point.

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And Edward was my savoir.

WOW... bit heavy, but it kinda had to go that way.

Thanks to the ladies that bought me in the fandomgivesback
auctions. The one shots will all be online shortly :D

Thanks for reading xxx

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15. Chapter 15: Bruised

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Love, as always to my betas Maylin & Twirlgrrl. I heart you both.

Hugs and boob gropes to my awesome prereader Hunterhunting.

LONGEST TIDES CHAPTER EVER...

SM owns all things Twilight.

EPOV

My BB was broken.

I wanted to pummel the person responsible. My heart was breaking with
every tear that rolled down her cheeks and every sob that racked her
body. All I could do was hold her, and tell her everything would be all
right.

She cried for almost two hours. Night had set in, and the room was pitch
black by the time she fell into an exhausted sleep. Alice had brought us
some hot drinks, but they remained on the bedside cabinet growing
cold.

Bella kept sobbing the same words.

Tyler.

Failure.

Alice.

Too much.

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It was obvious that it wasn't just Alice's arrival that had caused this. It
looked like my BB had finally reached her emotional limit. My guts
churned at the thought that I could be adding to that stress, with my
feelings for her. Was she really not ready for me, and I simply hadn't
wanted to listen? Had our love making only made matters worse? I was
kicking myself at my lack of control around her.

I kissed her shoulder and ran my nose across the cool skin. She still
smelled enticingly of me. I was swamped in her body and the smell of
us. It was home.

The door opened slightly and Alice tip toed in to rest on the end of the
bed.

"Has she finally given in?" She whispered.

I nodded, and pulled her closer to me. How could I possibly let her go
now? My throat tightened with fear just thinking about it.

"Do you think I should leave?"

Alice's tone was stricken. She didn't want to leave anymore than I
wanted her too. I'd missed having her around, and the three of us here
together just felt so right. Alice wanted to get to know Bella, but right
now everything was so precarious.

"I don't think she'd want that. It's not just about you returning, Ali. There
were things that happened to her before she arrived; things that she
clearly hadn't really dealt with. This little episode is her way of finally
sorting through it all."

Alice rolled her eyes and patted my ankle.

"You don't know her well enough to say that. Maybe she's just like
Renee. What if she rejects me too?"

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"I do know her," I hissed. "She's my whole world, and you know it! I feel
sick to my stomach knowing I could have played a part in this. I think I
have to back away, but I don't know if I have the strength to do that. Not
now that I know what it feels like; what she feels like!"

Alice grimaced. She knew how I felt about the woman I held in my arms.
I'd waited over twenty years for her, could I now live here platonically
with her after what we'd done?

I knew the answer immediately. I couldn't be without her, and would
take whatever she was willing to offer. No matter how small. I would
hurt every time I looked at her, but I would do it. I'd even move into the
fucking barn if I had to.

Bella mumbled in her sleep, and turned over, facing me. She rubbed
her cheek against my chest and sighed contentedly. My heart swelled.
Nobody had ever truly understood my pull to her, not even Aro. He'd
encouraged it further simply because he thought it was cute.

I couldn't honestly explain it myself. I'd just known from the moment my
young eyes had rested on her shocked face, that she was mine. She
was made solely for me and nobody else could make me happy. I was
even more certain of that now that I'd experienced how perfectly we fit
together.

Aro had been my only stability when I was growing up; the only person
who hadn't eventually left me. I couldn't allow Bella to be added to the
list of people that eventually left me. I'd never let another person into my
life again if she did. BB had the ability to bring me to my knees. She just
didn't realize that, no matter how much I told her. She didn't see me, but
I knew that was my fault. I wasn't letting her.

"Take her out into town, or somewhere tomorrow, Edward. Talk to her
away from this house; away from the memories. I'll sleep in the bus
tonight and give you both some space." She stood and walked softly to
the door. "It's good to be home, gorgeous."

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I chuckled and threw a pillow in her direction. It was only after she left
that it dawned on me that I should have told her about Emmett and the
gardener. They were sure to wake her up, and that only made me
chuckle more. Alice was not a morning person.

"Edward..."

I looked down to see her still sleeping. I loved her sleep talking. It was
usually nonsensical ramblings, but I found it utterly adorable. I stroked
her hair from her face and kissed her forehead, whispering for her to
hush.

"...love on the beach...so perfect..."

I held my breath. She thought it had been perfect. I had too. Nothing
could have prepared me for what it felt like just being with her like that,
and then across the coffee table. She'd never had a boyfriend quite like
me before. I knew where I wanted her, and I would do what I could to
get it.

"...not like Tyler...please?"

My heart cracked at the pain in her voice. She was even reliving the
past in her slumber. I couldn't let her dream of the fucking asshole, so I
lowered my mouth to hers and kissed her softly and slowly. Her lips
responded almost immediately. As did my cock.

Bella hummed and nestled closer to my chest. This was what I'd always
wanted. This was what I dreamed of, and now it was reality.

I knew I'd never give her up.

Bella Swan was mine.

/ T \\

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I woke to a hand skimming my chest. It felt divine. It was trailing across
the contours of my muscles, paying particular attention to my abs. I kept
my eyes closed and luxuriated in the freedom Bella thought she had
while I slept.

Her fingers twirled around a nipple, and I bit back a hiss. She was
certainly enjoying her perusal.

"I know you're awake," she stated, making my eyes snap open.

Busted!

My gaze met hers, and I groaned at the sadness that was reflected
back at me. There were tracks on her cheeks from the tears, and her
eyes were rimmed red and sore.

"Oh, BB. We'll make this better. I promise," I whispered, lifting my hand
to stroke her cheek.

She shook her head, ignoring the problem, and lowered her head to my
abdomen. I groaned, as her lips met my skin. My cock sprang to life,
wanting those lips to give it some attention. I knew she was trying to
distract me, or maybe it was herself, but I couldn't bring myself to stop
her. What if this was the last time we could be together? I knew we
needed to talk, and if she decided I was too much for her right now,
then I'd have to step away. To be her friend.

Bella was getting bolder in initiating intimacy between us, but after last
night, I thought she would need time alone, or with Alice. Obviously not,
because her fingers were already teasing at the elastic of my sweats.

"You don't have too..." I croaked out.

Bella cocked her brow at me playfully.

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"You are telling me, that I don't have to? Hmm, the tables have turned
Mr. Masen."

I wasn't being teased about sex by BB. I sat up quickly and pulled my
sweats off, before lying back on the bed and placing my hands behind
my head. I smirked at her shocked expression. Her cheeks were
flushed, embarrassed by my nakedness.

"Go ahead. I'm willing, and certainly ready."

I moved my hips, making my cock bob in front of her face. She gasped,
and tried to avert her gaze, but she couldn't. Bella wanted to look at my
cock.

"BB, it won't bite. Touch it," I said huskily.

Her hand trembled as she reached out, tentatively touching the smooth
skin. Her cheeks were pink, and she was holding the corner of her lower
lip between her teeth. I braced myself for the feel of her delicate
fingertips touching my sensitive flesh, but nothing could ever really
prepare me. Even the smallest touch could completely floor me. I tried
to be casual about her perusing my dick, but there was no denying the
slight tremble to my thigh, as she skimmed her palm across it.

She kissed each of my hipbones tentatively, before gazing up through
hooded eyes.

"BB," I whispered reverently.

She cleared her throat quietly and muttered, "Can I?"

"You don't ever need to ask. I'm yours. How many times do I need to tell
you that before you'll believe me?"

Bella exhaled loudly, making me shiver, as her breath floated across my
balls. I reached up, tucking her curtain of hair behind her ear. I needed

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to see her face clearly.

"You tell me, and I really do hear the words, but I think only time will
make me believe them, Edward."

"Will you give me that time?" My heart pounded in my chest. I didn't
want her to run back to Renee. I couldn't let her leave La Push. It would
hurt too much. "I will wait for as long as you need me too, but I won't
stop saying it. I'm yours."

"Do you know how totally absurd that sounds to most people? I was
seven, Edward! How could you know at that age that you wanted me? I
just don't understand, and that's where I start to freak out slightly. I'm
not going to deny that being with you is beyond anything I have ever
felt, or even imagined, but when you tell me you're mine after such a
short time, I panic."

"Why?" I asked, sitting up, and entwining both her hands in my own.

"You're not like other guys I've known. You have an edge, for want of a
better word, and sometimes it scares me."

I brought my cheek to hers and rubbed it softly, just wanting to feel her,
smell her. I knew she was right, and I was trying so fucking hard to rein
it in, but I lost control around her. Bella giggled a little and moved her
face from mine.

"Scratchy. You need to shave," she smiled. "I'm sorry. I was supposed
to be seducing you awake. I guess I failed at that."

"To seduce me, BB, all you need to do is be here, but if you want me to
back off, I will. You just need to tell me."

I waited with bated breath, hoping to fuck that she didn't deny me. I
wanted to ask her about the phone call with her mom, but now really
didn't seem like the time. Maybe Alice was right. On that thought, I

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continued to speak.

"I think we should go out for the day. Go into Port Angeles, do some
shopping. Let's just get away from here today."

"I need to try and call my mom again, but yeah, I'd really like that. Thank
you."

I kissed her cheek, her forehead, her nose, and then her lips. Just soft
little pecks, but enough to have my erection standing to attention again.
I was about to kiss her more thoroughly, when she pushed at my chest,
and had me falling back onto the mattress.

I studied her, as she shuffled down the bed, and settled between my
legs. I inhaled sharply. Was she about to...?

"I'll tell you when you get too much, Edward," she said quietly, before
lowering her head.

She began kissing up my right thigh, slow little open mouthed ones,
which had me gritting my teeth. I could feel her nervousness as she
approached my dick, but she continued across my balls and down my
left thigh. I twisted her hair into my hand, wrapping it around my wrist,
and held her close to me. Bella hummed, letting me know it was OK for
me to do that.

"Edward? Do you mind if I..?"

I rolled my eyes at the stupidity of the question. Tyler was a fucking
moron. End of.

"BB, don't tease." Was my only response.

She shifted slightly, before giving my shaft a nervous little lick. My dick
had never been harder, and I tried not to tug on her hair. She was so
careful with her touches, and kisses, and as much as I enjoyed the build

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up, I really wanted her to just take me in her mouth. When she kissed
the engorged tip, I pushed down a little on her head, trying to
communicate exactly what I wanted without being too forceful. It was
killing every ounce of self control I possessed.

I held my breath as she finally surrounded my cock with her warm, wet
lips. She hummed slightly around me, making my abdomen spasm. She
certainly seemed to like pleasing me in this way.

I watched her head bob in complete fascination, as she took me deeply
into her mouth.

Holy Fuck!

Bella swirled her tongue around the head and then pushed it hard
against the vein at the back, all while sucking amazingly well. She had
certainly done this before, and it shocked the hell out of me. I'd always
considered her rather inexperienced, but the way she was sucking my
cock now blew my theory completely out of the water.

Testing her enjoyment of this, I pushed her further down my shaft,
feeling my head hit the back of her throat. Bella only sucked harder.
Christ, my stamina had never been an issue. With other women I'd
never been so close to orgasm so soon after they'd taken me into their
mouths, but Bella was torturing me. I was trying my fucking best to think
of anything apart from how amazing her tongue felt sliding over my
cock, or how her fingers were ticking my balls. It wasn't helping though.
I knew I was about to lose my shit. It was unbelievable.

I tugged her hair, hoping I wasn't hurting her and pumped my hips, as
her head bobbed on my cock. It was far beyond any other blow job I'd
ever received, even the most carnal one with some tart from town didn't
compare.

"Holy fucking hell, BB!" I gasped, but totally lost all control, when her
teeth grazed my shaft on the way back up to lick the head.

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My muscles twitched, as I was consumed by the white heat. I spurted
my seed into her mouth, completely expecting her to gag, or at least spit
it out. To my utter shock, Bella swallowed it and continued to lap at the
swollen flesh. It was much too intense at that point, and I had to pull her
gently away.

Her deep brown eyes were shining in satisfaction, and if I wasn't
mistaken she was smirking in pride. The tiger I'd wished for was
definitely sitting on the bed with me now. I was in shock at the way
she'd brought me to orgasm, and so fucking quickly. I couldn't find a
coherent sentence. I just stared at her in awe, waiting for my heartbeat
to regulate.

She nibbled nervously on her lip, but her fingers were still stroking my
balls. I realized my fingers were still gripping her hair, so loosened them
and cupped her cheek.

"I have no words for that," I whispered. "It was...Wow!"

She giggled and kissed my stomach softly. I was a grown man, but I
melted. One small kiss to my stomach was all I needed to give me
hope.

"Tyler used to prefer that to..."

I growled.

"I don't want to know about that fucking loser. Bella he abused your
trust and lied to you. You're beautiful and deserve so much better than
that jackass."

She crawled up the bed to sit near where my head rested on the pillow.

"Are you what I deserve?" she muttered.

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"If you want me. I've already promised I would never hurt you like he
did. I mean that, but you have to take that leap. I can be everything you
will ever need."

I kissed her thigh through her sweats, and rolled onto my stomach. It
brought my face in line with her cotton covered pussy. I could smell her
arousal, and it only made the need to taste her that much stronger.

My fucking mouth was watering!

She rested back against the pillows, assessing me, waiting for my next
move. I smirked and rubbed my chin against her. I was gratified with a
soft purr and her eyes flickering closed.

"Look at me," I stated. "Never shy away."

Bella fixed her hooded gaze on mine, as I kissed her exposed navel.
Her response to my simple kisses and touches always floored me. At
some point I would need to address Tyler, because it seemed as though
she had never really been cherished. Why would she settle for that?
Second was never best.

Ever.

That had been why I'd waited. There was never anyone who had ever
even come close to Bella. Every woman I'd ever been with was eclipsed
by my BB. She was my life, my world.

Her fingers moved to play with my hair, as she gazed at me.

"Are we going to get dressed and go shopping?"

"Well...I was actually thinking of staying in bed a little longer. At least
until I hear you scream my name."

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"I didn't do that to you so I could get something in return. I did it
because I wanted to."

I rubbed my chin against her again, hoping for a bit more a response,
but her wall was up. Bella had closed herself off again.

"BB, I want you. Why is that so hard to believe?"

"EDWARD!" she shouted, making me jump.

"What the hell?"

She pushed me off her and moved from the bed. I rolled onto my back
and watched her ass as she began walking from the room. She looked
over her shoulder, and stated, "I screamed your name. Can we go
now?"

I chuckled.

Bella - 1. Edward -0.

/ T \\

Alice was still sleeping in the bus when we'd left for Port Angeles. I tried
to keep conversation light with Bella, but I was hurt that she had shut
me out. We still had so far to go. Was I wrong for wanting everything
now?

We'd had brunch at a little coffee house, and I was pleasantly surprised
she let me pay. I knew there was something heavy weighing on her
mind and it didn't take a genius to work it out. I left it until we'd finished
eating, before finally raising the subject.

"Talk to me," I stated.

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She pulled her hair into a loose ponytail, and it stretched her top across
her breasts. I inhaled sharply, she had no idea what that simple action
did. I could see the faint outline of her strapless bra through the thin
cotton tunic, and I longed to be back at the house; back in our room,
twisted in the sheets.

"I tried calling her. She hung up on me."

Her voice cracked, and the last thing I wanted was for her to cry, but
she needed to tell me. Only then would I know how to proceed. Renee
was a bitch and had always avoided confrontation. She would have her
say and then walk, never waiting for anyone else's point of view. I hated
her for the hurt she'd caused Aro and Alice, but now, seeing the tears in
my BB's eyes, I despised her.

I reached across the table and took her hand in mine, bringing it to my
lips and kissing each of her fingers. She blushed, making my insides
swirl with need. She was everything I'd dreamed of and more.

"If she won't talk to you, then there's nothing you can do. Will you talk to
Alice, please? You'll really like her, but she thinks you're going to reject
her like Renee did. Alice is just as scared as you, honey."

I moved her hand to cup my cheek, holding it there with my own. She
scowled at me, asking why she'd reject Alice.

"I didn't say you would. Alice is frightened. When we get back will you
have a chat? She slept in the bus last night, because she wasn't sure
how you'd react after you woke up. I know I'm slightly biased, but you
and Alice would get along great together. She adored Aro too, and I'm
sure she has a story or two to tell about me. I'd really like you to give
her a chance. I'd like her to stay in La Push."

"My mom seems to hate you both. Why?"

I sighed, squeezing her fingers a little for reassurance.

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"You mother always called me a waif..."

Bella snorted, and I knew that's exactly how Renee had referred to me
on the phone to Bella.

"She never understood why Aro kept me around. She told him a million
times that I wasn't his responsibility. After Aro took me in they were no
longer talking, but she found ways to make it clear that she was
disgusted. Like when she returned the gifts he sent for you, she'd
always attach a letter informing him of her distaste. I'm sorry Bella, but
your mother is fucking evil at times."

Bella merely nodded.

"Tell me what you're thinking. Please, BB?" I begged.

I couldn't stand to see the pain etched across her face. It was hurting
me twice as much, because I couldn't help her, or stop this.

"There are so many things running through my head right now, Edward.
I feel like I'm treading water and only just keeping my head above the
surface. I have a failed marriage, an aunt I never knew about, a mother
who clearly only loves me if it suits her, and then...then there's you."

Nausea rose in my throat. She was going to tell me I was too much, or
she wasn't ready. I prepared myself for what was to come, clutching at
her hand like a lifeline, but her next words shocked me.

"You are pretty much the only bright spot in my day at the moment. You
are the one keeping me afloat."

I shoved my chair back with such force it crashed onto its back on the
floor, but it was of no concern to me. I pulled Bella out of her seat and
towards me, crashing my mouth against hers, and kissing her harshly. It
didn't matter to me who was watching us, or what they thought. My
world had told me she needed me, so everything else paled into

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insignificance. I pushed my hands into her hair and devoured her mouth
with a hunger that could never really be sated in a room full of people.
Bella responded with just as much passion, and it only made me want
her more. My tongue skimmed her teeth, as I slowly pulled away.

Bella was gasping, and wide eyed; her lips beautifully swollen from my
kiss.

Mine.

All fucking mine.

I grinned widely at her and tugged her from the coffee shop and onto
the street. I wrapped my arm around her waist and placed a quick kiss
on her forehead.

"I know you hadn't finished, I'm sorry, but I thought you'd want me to
back off, and I'm just so fucking happy that you don't."

She giggled a little, before pushing her hand into the back pocket of my
jeans.

"What am I going to do?" she asked quietly.

"Do you want me to really tell you?"

We stopped outside a small shoe store, Bella glanced in the window.
She nodded.

"Forget her. She doesn't want to tell you why she refused to
acknowledge Alice, maybe because she has no reason why she did it
and now she feels like it's too late to backtrack. You've told her you
know about it, so the ball is in her court. It's her decision what she does
from here. You can keep trying to call her, to have her hang up, or you
can move on and maybe try to forge some kind of relationship with
Alice, your aunt."

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Bella nodded, but I had one more thing to say.

"As for the dickhead that was your husband, well, that was his problem.
He was the one who deceived you. You walked down that aisle loving
the man in front of you; clearly he didn't see you the same way."

"He said he did, but I just wasn't what he needed to make him happy.
It's just that..."

She went silent and chewed her lip. I pulled us over towards the wall, so
we could talk without getting in the way of passersby.

"Tell me! Stop hiding. You never tell me what you're really thinking. I
always have to ask. I don't like asking you to look at me. I care about
you, and it hurts me when you won't meet my gaze. I like to see what
you're feeling. You won't look at me when we have sex, unless I
demand it. Please! You need to understand I want all of you, BB, and to
be honest, I'm not willing to accept some half hearted attempt."

"I know," she breathed and rested her forehead against my chest. I
stroked her hair, removing the band securing her ponytail, and kissed
the top of her head. "I'm getting there. I understand how you feel about
me, and I'm getting used to the force of it. Sometimes I actually like it."

"Oh, really?" I replied huskily, backing her into the wall. "You like force?
Well, Ms. Swan, you could have told me that earlier. We could be
having so much fun now, instead of being cockblocked by the general
public."

Bella snorted and pushed at my chest playfully. I was happy dancing
inside, because she really was beginning to understand my need for
her. She was also beginning to accept it.

"Stop teasing me. I need a bookstore. I have to pick something up
before my next assignment. I should have gotten it weeks ago, but with
everything that's happened I completely forgot."

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I pulled a sad face at her, making her laugh out loud. "Just one kiss?" I
pouted.

She rolled her eyes, but placed her lips against mine. I sighed into the
perfection of her lips and kissed her languidly. I slid my tongue against
hers; a slow, soft mating that had her gripping my t-shirt and pulling me
closer. I braced my palm flat on the wall beside her head, but held her
chin firmly with the other. Now I had her acceptance, I didn't think I
needed to hold back as much. I wanted Bella to see just how much I
wanted her, and exactly what I had planned for us.

I growled, as a passerby bumped into me, dislodging my mouth from
Bella's. She simply smiled up at me, and pulled me into step beside her.
We held hands as we walked to the store, every few moments I'd bring
them to my mouth and kiss her fingers. I noted she hadn't put her hair
back up, nor had she asked why I'd taken it out of the ponytail. I was
hoping it was because she wanted to please me.

She let go of me as we entered the store, and walked on ahead to
locate whatever it was she needed. I waited at the front of the store, just
browsing the shelves at the bestsellers. Most of them were romance or
'chick lit' of some kind. I hoped to Christ she wasn't buying something
like that. Then again, they didn't seem to fit with her perception of
romance at the moment. With that in mind, I fired off a quick text to
Emmett. A barbeque with friends was most definitely in order. It would
smooth things with Alice, and maybe she and Rose could help Bella see
things with her mother much more clearly.

Emmett had just responded when Bella returned with two hardback
books.

"Important?" she asked, nodding to my cell.

"No, it's Emm. Barbeque tonight? Us, Emm and Rose. And Alice, of
course."

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"Sure," she replied.

She waved the books in my face and walked over to pay for them. I
watched as the boy behind the counter eyed up Bella. I smirked,
knowing she was mine, but there was no harm in showing him that. I
strolled over and wrapped my arms around her shoulders from behind.
It was only then that I noticed the books she was purchasing.

"Crime novels, BB?"

"Yeah, I have to interview the author for the magazine. I love his work,
but haven't had a chance to read the latest two in the series. The
interview isn't for a couple of weeks, so I've plenty of time to research
and sort out some decent questions."

Bella collected her purchases from the young boy and turned, my arm
still slung over her shoulder, as we walked from the store.

"So, you like Anthony Swanning then?" I questioned.

"Hmm, yeah. Actually it was Tyler that got me interested in him. A
couple of years ago he brought a book home, and was about to trash it.
He said he'd tried, but it wasn't his thing. I took it from him and devoured
it in a day. After that, I did a search on the internet and found there were
already another four in the series. I'd read those by the end of the week.
I also admit to doing a little research on him, but it's surprisingly vague.
No one really knows anything about him. He's a bit of a recluse. It's all
very intriguing actually."

I steered her towards the car, keeping her close. I loved showing the
world that this beautiful person belonged to me.

"I'm sure it is. You'll have to let me know if they're any good. I hate you
reading the competition."

She giggled as we reached the car.

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"You just hate me being interested in another guy."

"How do you know it's really a guy? Most authors use pseudonyms. It
could be a woman."

We climbed into the car and buckled up.

"Well, I'll find out in a couple of weeks. Won't I?"

I muttered under my breath, but she didn't hear me over the sound of
the engine.

The ride home was fun. We talked all the way, mostly getting to know
the little things about one another. Bella seemed to have eclectic taste
when it came to music, and shocked me with her love of the Alien series
of films. She didn't seem the sci-fi kind of person. I adored learning all
the new things about her, and simply couldn't get enough. I was
disappointed when we finally got home.

I pulled up outside the house and heard Alice yelling almost
immediately. I checked my watch; it was only just after three. That was
a little early for Alice. She was a night owl. I could make out her snarling
at someone, as she stood in the middle of the garden in her pajama
bottoms and a tiny tank top. Her arms were flailing wildly as she
screamed.

"What the hell is going on?" Bella asked as we got out of the car, and
started to walk over to Alice.

I shrugged, and shouted to Alice.

She stomped over to us in her huge pink bunny rabbit slippers. She
looked almost comical. Her clothing said 'sweet and innocent' but her
face and posture threatened bodily harm. I backed up, as she closed in
on my personal space.

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"You need to sort out the dickhead in your garden, Edward!"

"What?" I asked, shaking my head at her nonsense.

"The fucking gardener and his stupid fucking machine! It's too early.
Why the hell are they here?" She pouted at me, her hands on her hips
waiting for my response.

"Alice it's after three. He'll be finished for the day in a couple of hours. I
should have told you, but you'll have to get used to it. The house needs
renovating." I groaned. "What did he do wrong specifically? I'll have a
word."

"Well...he was making...the noise woke..."

"Christ, Alice! You're yelling at him because his weed whacker woke
you up? Where is he? I'll go and apologize."

Alice hung her head, but her lips were still moving, muttering incoherent
little words.

I walked over to try and find the gardener. He was still cutting the weeds
with his ear protectors on, completely oblivious to Alice's onslaught. I
tapped him on the shoulder, making him jump. He spun around
instantly, and I heard a sharp intake of breath from behind me.

Alice was staring at the gardener. I snorted loudly and slung my arm
back around Bella's shoulders.

"Let's go inside, BB. Alice has something to say to the blond. Am I right,
Ali?"

"Fuck off!" she snarled at my sarcastic tone.

Bella and I strolled into the house, and it was only when we were inside
that she asked what was going on.

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"Alice has the hots for your gardener. Did you not see her face? She
was practically taking her pajama bottoms off."

"Oh!" Bella replied, shocked at the revelation.

I took the bag from her hand and tossed it onto the couch.

"BB," I crooned, looking at her through lazy eyes.

She blushed, clearly knowing what was on my mind. For each step I
took forward, she took one back. I stalked her across the living room
until she reached the foot of the stairs. I watched her throat constrict as
she gulped.

"Alice is busy, and we never finished what you started this morning. We
still have a couple of hours before the guests arrive."

I traced a lazy finger down her throat, across her collarbone and down
below her top. She gave a low moan, making my cock strain at the
confines of my jeans. One touch was all it took.

"Bed! Now! BB, I'm serious when I say you have thirty seconds to get
your clothes off, otherwise I'm ripping them off."

She grinned in excitement and squealed, as she raced upstairs. I
chased after her, laughing as I threw her onto the bed, and quickly
blanketed her body with mine.

"Fuck, you're amazing," I whispered, just before my lips descended and
consumed hers.

Today was a fucking good day.

Aww... cuteness...

Thanks for reading!

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xxx

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16. Chapter 16: Fire

I say it every single time, but thank you all so much for your
continued reviews and love for my fic.

Love to my super dooper beta Maylin & pre reader hunterhunting. I
adore you both.

And on with the show...

SM owns all things Twilight.

BPOV

Edward was trying so hard to make me forget. He was surrounding me,
and trying to divert my attention. I'd asked him for some space, but he
was reluctant to leave me alone. I'd tried explaining I wasn't feeling
sorry for myself, I just need time to think, and to start reading my new
books. Eventually he'd given in, but only because he needed to get the
barbeque going. He'd insisted that I read on the porch. That was so he
could make sure I was doing OK. I could have told him to get lost, but it
was nice having someone to look after me.

I had a lot to digest and figure out, but having Edward hounding me only
added to my confusion. I was glad I'd be able to speak to Rose soon. If
she hadn't decided to come tonight I would have gone to see her
tomorrow. I needed a friend.

"Watcha reading?" Alice chimed, startling me.

She skipped over disturbing my little haven. I lifted the book up, so she
could see the cover, and moved my feet from where they rested on the
seat opposite, allowing her to sit down. She gave an odd frown, which I
didn't understand as she looked at the book, and sat. I guess now was
the time to talk to her. I simply hadn't been able to before, and none of

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this was her fault. I couldn't blame her like I blamed my mother.

"I don't know anything about you. I didn't even know you existed until
you walked through the door," I whispered.

Alice grimaced a little before stating, "Edward told me, and if you don't
mind me saying, that's a pretty fucking sucky thing. Why would Renee
keep that from you? You're a grown adult!"

"I think we both know why she didn't tell me, Alice. I just don't know
what I can do about it if she refuses to speak to me. I keep trying, but
now she won't even answer the phone."

She patted my knee in a soothing gesture.

"I'm sorry, but I gave up a long time ago trying to decipher what goes on
in my sister's head. She hurt Dad so much with her inability to accept,
not just me but the whole situation. It wasn't like he was still married.
Bella, it wasn't an affair."

I placed my book on the small table and nodded.

"I'm not stupid. I've done the math."

Edward was watching us, as he poked at the barbeque. I wondered if
there was an argument between Alice and me who he would jump to
defend. Alice was a sister to him, but I was...I shook the thoughts from
my head. Hoping never worked out well for me. It was too late though,
the seed had already been planted, and it was beginning to grow.

Alice followed my gaze to Edward, and grinned.

"He's so happy you're really here. Can I ask a favour?"

I agreed but had no idea why she would need a favour from me. She
didn't even know me.

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"Don't break his heart. It's been locked away for so long. He saved it for
you, and I don't want to imagine how he would cope if you shredded it."

I sighed sadly. "Alice, I find it very difficult to comprehend why he waited
for me. He tells me I'm his and always will be, but how can someone
know that without actually knowing the person?"

I watched her pick imaginary pieces of fluff off her sweater and knew
she was figuring out the best way to answer me. I shouldn't be saying
these things to her. I should be discussing granddad and my mother,
but that felt so redundant. I couldn't alter what had occurred.

"Edward has very few people in his life. Even his agent isn't allowed
here. He goes to see her in Seattle when he's needed. Don't get me
wrong, he's happy that way. The less people around him, the less
chance he has of being hurt." She took a moment to think again before
continuing, "I don't know why you're the one, BB, but you are. Can't you
just accept that?"

I rolled my eyes when she used that damn pet name. I needed to ask
him what it meant. It was annoying me that I didn't know, but I could
admit to myself that when Edward breathed it into my ear, nothing
sounded sexier.

"It's just a lot to absorb."

"I suppose," she shrugged. "But I would be jumping at the chance to
have a guy half as devoted to me as Edward is to you. Neither Edward,
nor my dad ever let me forget you. You were always a part of this odd
little family. It's good to have you home, BB."

"Thank you."

I took a moment before I asked cautiously, "Have you had any contact
with my mother since the argument?"

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Alice shook her head, sending her little black spikes flying around her
face. It seemed so strange that she was related to me. She was the
complete opposite of Renee, and I could see no resemblance, other
than Aro's eyes. She must look like her mother.

"I've tried to call and after dad died I wrote her a letter, but I got nothing
in return. I've finally decided to draw a line. I can't go on like this forever;
she wants nothing to do with me. To her, she doesn't have a sister. I
guess that was a deciding factor in why I came back here. I missed my
home, and I missed Edward. I knew dad had left the house to you, so
thought it was only logical that you'd be here; even if it was only to try
and sell it."

"Try?" I said raising a brow at her.

"Yeah, I wouldn't have let you, neither would Edward."

She was so matter of fact it scared me. She spoke like Edward did, as
though everything was plotted out, and there was no such thing as
choice.

"You guys are very close." It was a statement rather than a question.

"Yes. Edward gave me what, I guess, Renee should have. He's my real
sibling. That's why it would hurt me, if you ever hurt him. I'm not
pleasant when I'm pissed off, Bella."

I gazed over at him again. He was running his fingers through his hair,
and shooting quick glances our way. I smiled warmly at him, reassuring
him we were OK, and not about to break into a brawl.

"I'd really like to stay for a while. I want to get to know you; for us to be
friends. Do you think that's possible?"

I could hear the anxiety oozing from her words. She expected me to
treat her like Renee. I wouldn't do that.

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"We can try, Alice. I'd like to talk to you more about granddad, just not
right now. I'm still feeling very overwhelmed by it all. Is that all right?"

"Yes," she said giddily, trying not to bounce on her seat.

"Oh! I'm not sure where you can sleep, though. Edward has the couch
and..."

"What? You still make him sleep on the couch?" she asked completely
perplexed.

I was about to answer, but she wasn't looking at me. Her eyes were
focused on the blond gardener she'd been arguing with earlier. Edward
was right, she liked him.

"Go! Ask him to stay for some food."

Alice giggled like an excited child.

"Really? Can I?"

I nodded, and before I could say anything further, she danced off the
porch towards her man.

I'd come here to find myself, but it looked like I was finding a lot of other
things instead.

A family.

I went to pick my book up, but Edward arrived, flopping himself into the
wooden chair Alice had just vacated. He picked my feet from the floor
and rested them on his lap, rubbing slow delicious circles around my
ankle bone with his thumb. His moss green eyes were studying me
intensely. I knew he was making sure I wasn't upset.

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"I'm fine, Edward. I told her she could stay. I'm just not entirely sure
where."

"Thank you and she'll be on the couch. I won't be leaving our bed, BB."

"I didn't do it for you. It was because I don't want to be like my mother. I
also feel like this is her house. I just can't turn her away. Oh, and it's my
bed," I added.

He leaned forward, bringing his face close to mine.

"You're nothing like her," he soothed.

His elegant fingers stroked softly across my cheek, making my skin
tingle in their wake. His other hand moved up my leg, under my yoga
pants, and I giggled when he tickled the skin behind my knee.

"Ticklish?" he smirked, his eyes glittering in mirth.

"No!" I denied adamantly, hoping he would stop.

The mischievous look on his face told me he wouldn't. I flushed at the
thought of his fingers trailing across my skin. I knew what those digits
could do and how amazing they could make me feel. My breathing
hitched as they got closer to his goal.

"Tell me it's our bed," he demanded. "Otherwise I tickle."

His tone was playful, but I knew he was serious. He wanted more from
me. I tried to work out exactly how I felt about spending every night with
him, but before I could figure anything out his fingers danced across my
flesh. I squirmed in my seat, laughing loudly. Edward only tickled more
and moved the hand from my face to my rib cage.

"Admit it, or I tickle here too."

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I bit my lip, determined not to say anything to him. It was difficult, he
looked so beautiful, and as Alice said, happy. All I could think about was
kissing those lips and pulling on his hair until he grunted.

His fingers moved on my ribs and knee, making me snort, and buck
from the chair.

"Say it!" he laughed.

I gasped for breath as he continued, and eventually I yelled, "OUR
BED! OK, IT'S OUR BED!"

He stopped instantly, and crashed his lips to mine. It was hot and needy
the moment flesh connected to flesh. I was completely breathless, my
head spinning, as his tongue pushed into my mouth and mated with
mine. A low growl reverberated up through his chest, and I rubbed my
thighs together, feeling the vibrations in my pussy. Holy Hell, I didn't
realize it was even possible to be aroused from a sound alone.

Edward groaned, as I heard Alice yell, "Get a room!" Very fitting
considering what the tickle torture was about. He pulled his lips from
mine, and rested our foreheads together. He was panting as heavily as I
was. It always surprised me that he was just as affected by our
connection.

"Damn Alice! Maybe you should rethink allowing her to stay." He rubbed
his nose against mine, in a cute little Eskimo kiss. "Are you going to get
ready? Emm and Rose will be here soon."

I swooned at the cute nose rubbing, and shocked myself by kissing him
quickly on the lips. I didn't initiate things between us often, but it felt
natural to do it at that moment. Edward's grin was huge as I stood with
the intention of going to clean up and change my clothes, but he called
me back.

I raised a questioning brow at him.

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"Wear a skirt, BB."

I blinked rapidly, wondering why the hell he wanted that.

"Huh? Why?"

He sighed and grabbed my hips, pulling them towards him. His nose
nuzzled at my navel, where it peeked under the edge of my tank. My
legs almost gave out. The smallest touch set me on fire and had me
wanting so much more.

"Can't you just do as I ask? There is a reason, but I can't tell you until
later." His tone was clipped.

He meant what he said, and I would upset him if I came downstairs in
jeans. I smiled down at him, and nodded, wanting to keep that smile on
his face.

"I can, but you will definitely owe me one."

Edward kissed my stomach loudly, and stated, "I wouldn't have it any
other way, BB. Now scoot!"

I laughed all the way up the stairs, but it was only when I got into the
bedroom, that I wondered what the hell I was going to wear.

/ T \\

I'd eventually settled on a blue plaid skirt, along with a simple black top
and boots. By the time I'd actually gotten ready Rose and Emm had
arrived. Rose had come straight to me, eyeing Alice. I'd told her what I
could but everyone was watching me, checking I still wasn't going to
crack. Rose had been under the impression that I'd always known about
Alice, so she'd been shocked when I'd told her the story of how Alice
had interrupted us.

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Edward and Emmett had stayed by the barbeque, grilling the meat.
They'd even lit a little fire near the seating area. A sense of home
washed over me, as I sat nursing a beer and listening to the
conversation around me. I felt a part of their lives and they felt a part of
mine. This was where I was supposed to be, and I was meant to be with
these people.

Alice had invited Jasper, the gardener. She was currently sitting on his
lap and stroking her fingers through his already messy hair. They
seemed locked in a world of their own. I could distinguish little nods of
their heads, as if they were communicating, but no words had been
said. Strange.

"So how do you feel about her staying?" Rose asked quietly, nodding
towards Alice.

"Actually, I think I'm fine with it. It's a big shock, but I'd like to get to
know her. Apart from my mom, Alice is the only other family I have. She
seems harmless enough, anyway."

Rose snorted. "Not towards Jasper, she isn't. Poor guy."

"Oh, I forgot to tell you, I finally got an assignment! I get to interview one
of my favorite authors for the magazine. Isn't that great?"

"Wow! Sweetie, that's brilliant. As much as I love staying at home,
sometimes I envy you for having a career. Maybe after the baby is
born," she sighed wistfully.

I agreed. I couldn't imagine not having my job, even after we had
children.

We, Bella? As in you and Edward? Really?

I blushed at my own thoughts. Had I really just imagined Edward and
me as parents? I was so glad I hadn't said it out loud. I looked over to

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him, to see him lost in conversation with Emmett. He was scowling and
shaking his head. I made a mental note to ask him about it later.

I turned back to Rose, watching the way she rubbed her belly in pride.
She was so happy to be pregnant after all this time. However, whenever
we'd spoken it had always been about me, and my problems. I felt like a
selfish friend.

"Can I take you shopping for the baby next week? I'd like to get you a
few things?"

Her face lit up, easing my guilt.

"I'd love that! We could make a whole day of it? Lunch, too?"

"That would be great. I'll need to buy a new outfit for the interview. I
have to look my best for him, he's such an amazing author and don't
want him looking down at me."

"Why?" Edward interrupted, snarling slightly.

I stuttered, startled by his outburst. I hadn't even known he was
listening.

"W-Well, I don't want him to think some tramp has come to interview
him. I always like to look professional when I go on assignment."

"What do you mean go?" he asked, turning more fully in his chair to
face me.

Everyone grew silent, only the crackling of the fire intruded on it. I
gulped from the intensity of his expression. I wasn't quite sure what I'd
done wrong, but he was annoyed. The problem was the sternness to his
voice was turning me on. I could feel a throb build between my legs,
and my nipples pebbled as he continued to stare at me.

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I shook my head, trying to ignore the prickling of my skin in awareness
of Edward and answered.

"I'll be staying in Seattle for a couple of nights. I'll be interviewing him
there."

"And you didn't think it necessary to consult me? Why wouldn't you tell
me that you're leaving?" his voice cracked a little at the end, and my
chest ached.

I wanted to go, but would he see this as me not taking our relationship
seriously? I wouldn't be ruled by him. I knew he was possessive and
sometimes dominant, but he needed to see I made my own decisions,
especially when it came to work.

"I'm not leaving!" I stated, raising my voice. "I'm going away for work, for
two days, Edward!"

I watched Emmett pull Rose up from the chair and take her over to the
barbeque. It obviously wasn't to show her the food. We were beginning
to embarrass ourselves.

"Edward, can we..?"

"No! BB, don't think I'm ignoring this one. You kept this from me. I
thought we'd agreed on the beach that we were together, or had I
imagined that along with a multitude of other things?"

I had no clue where all this was coming from. He looked genuinely
upset, and clearly considered my two days away as desertion. It was
only when I worked that out, that I remember some of the things Alice
had said, and a little of what had been in Aro's letter to me.

Edward was hurting, and he needed me to show him that I wasn't going
anywhere.

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"Come with me."

"What?" he asked incredulously.

"Come with me. The hotel is booked, so you wouldn't need to do
anything. Just come with me."

I smiled at him, hoping to ease the tension. Edward stood and held his
hand out to me. I frowned, but took it, and he pulled me up.

"Follow me," he whispered, squeezing my hand tightly.

I didn't look back at the others, as he tugged me around the side of the
house, and out of view.

"What was that all about..?" I tried to ask, but his lips fixed forcefully on
mine, stopping all conversation.

He shoved my back against the wooden slats of the house. His mouth
met mine aggressively, as his hand gripped my waist tightly. I could
taste the hunger on his tongue, and feel the need rolling off him.
Edward needed reassurance. Right now he was nothing more than an
abandoned, hurt little boy who was seeking solace the only way he
knew how. I wanted to weep for him. Aro had been right, he wasn't any
more certain of himself than I was. Edward just hid it better.

I fumbled with the hem of his shirt, pushing my hands underneath and
laying my palms flat against his abdomen. He nipped harshly at my
bottom lip, growling and pushing me harder into the wall. He was being
more forceful even than he'd been before, and I knew it was what he
needed right now. It was arousing me beyond anything I'd experienced.
The more he bit at my mouth, the more I wanted it. The tighter he held
me, the tighter I wanted it, and the more he ground against me, the
more I ground back.

I whimpered when his lips left mine, to torture my neck.

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"Shush," he crooned in his velvet smooth voice. "They'll hear you."

I gulped.

He was right. The others would be able to hear everything. I tried to
move away from him, but he held me firmly.

"Where do you think you're going, BB?"

"You said yourself, they can hear us. We can finish this later," I
whispered, but Edward shook his head very slowly.

"You wanted to know why I asked you to wear a skirt. This is it." He
cocked a brow and smirked devilishly. "You're going to have to be very
quiet."

"Huh?"

Sometimes I felt like I was one step behind him. Was he suggesting
we...? Here?

Oh, Lord, he was. I should have been horrified, but instead I was
grinning at him and chewing on my lower lip, knowing how much he
liked it. I was actually teasing Edward Masen, egging him on so he
would have sex with me against the side of the house. I felt like a
different person.

He licked his lips slowly, making my thighs clench. He looked like a
predator stalking its prey, and I wasn't worried about being that prey. I
wanted him to devour me.

"Can you be really quiet?" he asked huskily.

I nodded, not trusting my voice to speak.

"Do you have panties on BB?"

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Again, I nodded. He lowered his head to my neck, running his nose
slowly up and down it, before growling into my ear, "Take. Them. Off."

I moaned out loud, and received a tap on my nose with his finger.
"Silence or the others will hear."

He stepped away, but only long enough for me to remove my panties.
He snatched them from me and placed them in the pocket of his jeans.
The darkness consumed us, but I could still see the playfulness glinting
in his eyes. He was certainly enjoying this, and to my amazement, so
was I.

Edwards hand held my throat firmly, as he kissed me again. His fingers
tickled the back of my neck, and his thumb stroked down the front,
before he danced them down to my breast. I gritted my teeth to stop the
moan slipping out, as he cupped my breast through the fabric.

"No bra?" he questioned.

I wanted to shake my head, but knew he would want me to speak. I
mumbled about the woods and him telling me not to wear one again. It
pleased him more than I could have imagined. He attacked my mouth
with vigor, all tongues and teeth, as his fingers pinched and flicked my
nipples.

I was pushing my hips against his thigh, hoping for some sort of friction,
but he kept moving his thigh out of the way. He wanted me desperate
for him. I certainly wasn't far away from it. My whole body was
electrified, and needed an outlet.

My fingers skimmed across his chest, under his shirt, feeling every
muscle. I wanted to lick him, so when he broke apart, gasping for air, I
trailed my tongue slowly along his jaw. The stubble was rough against
it, but the taste of pure undiluted Edward drove me into a lust filled
frenzy. If he didn't take me soon I knew I'd scream at him, guests be
damned. His hand gripped my ass firmly, pulling me closer towards him,

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and making his nails bite into the flesh.

His mouth moved back to my neck, and he latched his teeth against the
flesh and sucked hard. I mewled and hitched my leg around his knee.
His fingers immediately snaked to my wet needy pussy. Edward parted
my folds and delved his fingers inside, groaning when he met my slick
heat. He didn't stop sucking on my neck until I whined a little in pain. I
knew that was going to mark, but couldn't bring myself to care. His
fingers were playing with my pussy, and making my body hum with
need for him and him alone.

I lowered my hand to his jeans and unbuckled the belt, before popping
each button open. Edward pushed a finger into me, as the last one flew
open and my hand touched his hardened cock.

He cursed into my neck, my fingers wrapping around his erection tightly.
We began rocking in unison against the house, both consumed in each
other.

"Another?" he questioned, but before I could comprehend what he was
referring to, he pushed a second finger inside me, stretching me
deliciously.

"Oh!" I whimpered.

Our breathing was becoming heavy and fast. I needed more than his
fingers to sate me. I needed him filling me, thrusting into me with force.

"Edward," I gasped softly.

"I want you now, BB. I can feel how wet you are for me. So fucking
ready for my cock. Tell me you want me."

"Oh yes," I breathed.

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He pulled his fingers from me, making me want to cry, but I watched in
fascination as he brought his shining fingers to his lips and lapped at
them, tasting me. My legs almost gave way. How could something I
would have found repulsive only a few months ago be so arousing now?

"Divine," he crooned, before hitching me up and around his body, my
back flat against the wood.

"I'm dying to fuck you from behind. I want to watch my dick enter you,
hard. But you're not tall enough for me to do it here, standing. I promise
you when they've gone I will have my wish. I will have you how I want
you."

I bit my cheek to stop the loud moan about to burst from my lips at his
words; never in my life had someone spoke that way to me. It was
unbelievably sexy coming from him. Images of what he described flitted
through my head, making me rock my hips faster and tug tighter on his
hair. All thoughts of the people waiting for us across the garden were
gone. All I could think of now was Edward, and the way he would feel
inside of me.

"Condom," I hissed, hoping this would be one of those times he had one
handy.

He smirked at me, pushing his hips closer to mine, bracing me against
the house before reaching in his back pocket. I took it from him, tearing
it open with my teeth. I handed it back to him, knowing he had better
access than I did. Edward buried his face in my chest as he covered his
cock.

We both groaned as he thrust harshly into me. I gripped his hair tighter,
squeezing my thighs and rocking along with his thrusts. The hair on my
body was standing on end, and goose bumps splayed across my skin.
We were gasping for breath, as he rammed me against the house,
gritting his teeth and snarling between each pump.

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I clawed at his shirt, only then realizing we were both still completely
clothed. All I had removed were my panties.

I felt his legs tremble under me and he hitched me higher, slamming his
cock into my aching pussy as hard as he could. I brought my mouth
back to his, tasting myself on his tongue, at the same time, the throb
between my legs started to spiral out of control. Edward must have felt
it, because he lowered his lips, took hold of my cotton covered nipple
between his teeth and nibbled.

"I...I... oh fuck..." I breathed.

"Let go, BB. Let me feel you come."

On those words, I did come, harder than any other time in my life. I
couldn't stop the scream exiting my mouth, as it ripped through me,
burning my insides in its wake. I sobbed, as the aftershocks racked my
abdomen. Edward spilled into my body seconds later, hissing and
grunting into my chest. His teeth pulled at my t-shirt. He was reduced to
a snarling primal beast, only needing his completion, and by the way he
was bucking against me, his was just as wild as mine.

I closed my eyes and dropped my head back against the wall, trying to
restore my equilibrium. I could still feel Edward pulsing inside of me, as
he nuzzled my chest. I simply closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment.

"Thank you," Edward mumbled.

"For?"

He lowered my feet to the floor slowly and cupped my face between his
hands.

"For asking me to come with you. That would be very nice."

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Nice seemed like a strange word to use given what had just happened
between us, but I sighed and turned my face to kiss the inside of his
wrist. His pulse was still erratic, and I smiled at the knowledge.

"Was that what this was about? Marking your territory?"

He snorted, and kissed my nose.

"No, BB. I told you, I had it planned all along. That's why I told you to
wear a skirt, and why I had a condom in my back pocket."

"You planned to have sex with me while our friends were sitting yards
away, eating and drinking?" I asked incredulously.

Edward threw his head back and laughed.

"You sound so disgusted by it, but think of it this way, I only planned it,
you've just actually done it. Weren't disgusted when you were gasping
for breath, because my cock was making you come, were you?"

I wanted to be horrified by his words, but he was correct. I couldn't
really be disgusted with him for merely planning it. I'd been a more than
willing participant.

I rolled my eyes, trying to make light of my assessment. I didn't want
him thinking I thought what we'd done was wrong, but anxiety weighed
heavy in my gut when I started to wonder how I was going to go back to
our friends. They had probably heard my screams of joy, and had
worked out exactly what we'd been up to.

Edward let go of my face to remove the condom and fasten his jeans. I
smoothed my skirt and looked down at my top. It was wet where
Edward had been teasing my nipple. It was blatantly obvious what we'd
been doing, even if by some miracle they hadn't heard me.

"I think a wet top is the least of your problems," he stated.

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"Why?" I asked as he threw the condom into the trashcan.

"Well, you have no underwear on and you have a rather nasty looking
hickey on your neck."

He didn't sound sorry about either and yet he'd caused them both. I
raised my hand and pushed at the tender skin. It certainly felt sore; that
didn't bode well. I ruffled my hair, hoping it would cover it for now, and
held my hand out to him.

"Panties."

He shook his head smirking. "No way! These are mine. At least until I
get my way with you."

"Didn't you just get that?"

Edward kissed me passionately, delving his tongue roughly into my
mouth and sliding it against mine. I struggled for breath when he finally
released me.

"No. I told you what I wanted to do to you, and I will, honey. I will get
you on your hands and knees and begging for me to satisfy you."

With that, he took my hand in his and started to walk back towards out
friends. My heart began to pound. I was so embarrassed, but when we
rounded the house, nobody was there. It was deserted; even the fire
had been put out.

"Emmett's car's gone. Oops, they must have left."

I breathed a sigh of relief. I would call Rose in the morning and
apologize, but I was pleased I didn't have to see any of them now.

"Where's Alice?"

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Edward pointed over to her pink bus. The internal light was on, and I
could make out two shadows through the closed drapes. Alice was
entertaining. He swung our joined hands between our bodies, making
me feel like I was a teenager again.

"Well, Ms Swan, can I escort you to bed?"

I giggled and nodded, before telling him what a great night I'd had.

"Me too."

We climbed the steps and before entering the house, Edward wrapped
his arms around my waist and looked lovingly down at me.

"Do you feel it, BB?" He whispered.

I frowned. I didn't have the faintest idea what he was referring to.

"Completion. And I don't mean what we just did. I mean us, this house,
Alice. It all feels complete. Everything I've waited for, everything I've
ever wanted, it's all here finally."

I swallowed hard trying to dislodge the lump that formed in my throat.
Edward really was happy about this, about me. The problem was I didn't
feel the completion.

My vision of the perfect future wasn't the same as his, and I was so
confused I wasn't sure it ever could be.

At that moment I knew I could break Edward Masen's heart.

Couple of things... My one shot Opheliac made it through to the
voting of the Les Femmes Noires contest. Voting is here: http:/
www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/~lesfemmesnoires

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The second chapter of my new fic First Edition will be online
tomorrow.

Leave me some love... muah xx

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17. Chapter 17: Words

I want to thank everyone for reviewing. The last chapter moved
Tides over the 5k mark!

Love to my awesome betas, Maylin & Twirlgrrl. I love you ladies!

Thanks to my prereader hunterhunting xx

Oh, I've been told a panty warning applies to this chapter :)

SM owns all things Twilight.

BPOV

I was a complete mess of emotions.

Everywhere I turned, I saw Edward and I was beginning to feel slightly
suffocated. I didn't want him to go completely. I just needed my own
space. He was starting to mean so much to me, and I knew his feelings
were stronger than he was telling me. Alice had attested to that.

I just couldn't come to grips with my feelings.

Edward was unlike any other person I'd ever met. He exuded
confidence and control, something Rose had pointed out, that I wanted.
It didn't stop the continued doubt. I'd made a grand fuck up of choosing
the right man the first time around. How could I be certain I wasn't doing
it again?

I groaned and continued to unpack the huge carton in front of me. It was
the last of my belongings and I'd kept it knowing I'd probably end up in
tears while doing it. It was full of photos, trinkets and gifts saved over
the last few years. My wedding photos were in there, along with my
rings. I was too sentimental for my own good. Most women would have

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thrown them at the adulterer, but everything in the box formed a part of
me, and I wasn't ready to let go. Those years had been based on a lie,
but they were still a part of my life, whether I liked it or not.

I smiled warmly at the cute little teddies for a few moments, before
stretching over and giving them a new home on the dressing table.
Angela had bought them for me, hoping to cheer me up when I'd been
depressed over the state of my marriage. They'd only worked for a short
while, but at least she'd tried. My mother had merely told me to sort
myself out and go back to him, according to her, he was a good man. I
snorted at that particular memory. She'd never once tried to find out
what happened. She simply didn't want to know, and the reality of that
clawed at my insides.

The rain slapped hard against the window, startling me. It seemed to
have been pouring down all damn day. Alice was still locked tight in her
bus with Jasper, and I had no idea where Edward had disappeared to.
Newton was my only company, snuggled up against my ass on the
floor.

I reached into the box and finally found what I'd been searching for.

This was my secret.

Nobody knew about this. I felt silly and childish for even harbouring
such thoughts, but I couldn't help it.

This shoe box was dedicated to Anthony Swanning.

I'd played it down when I told Edward I was a bit of a fan. The truth was,
I was obsessed with him and had been for years. After finishing that first
book, I'd tried to find out everything I could about him, but the
information was all extremely vague. I'd eventually written to his agent. I
felt like a schoolgirl writing to the Jonas Brothers, and had felt just as
deflated when I received a standard thank you response. It also said it
had been passed onto the author. I didn't believe it, so had been

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stunned when a letter from him personally had arrived two weeks later.
He'd also enclosed a signed book. I'd been on a high for weeks, and
treasured them both. After that, I would send random letters out to his
agent, and sure enough, two weeks later I would get a letter from
Anthony himself. They were all typed up, but were extremely friendly. I'd
grown used to the sporadic correspondence, but hadn't sent anything to
him lately because of the upheaval.

I wondered if he was the reason I was holding back with Edward. I'd
always harboured the illusion that one day I'd actually meet him. That
day was no longer an illusion. I was going to Seattle, and I was going to
finally put a face to those words. I was torn between the fantasy of
Anthony Swanning and the reality of Edward Masen.

Edward was becoming a part of my life; a part of my heart, but I knew I
would never be there one hundred percent until I put Anthony Swanning
to rest. I would interview him and silently bid him goodbye. My life was
here in La Push with Edward and our dumb dog Newton.

I fumbled with the box, trying to replace the lid, when I lost my grip on it
and it scattered across the floor. Berating myself, I began to gather the
letters, but stilled when I picked up a photo. I'd completely forgotten he'd
sent this to me. It had been included in one of the most recent letters,
and was a picture of a beach. In the center of the expanse of sand sat a
lonely sandcastle. I remember being confused by it at the time, but had
forgotten to ask him why he'd sent it the next time I'd written to him.

I stared at it now, smiling at its simplicity. The beach could be
anywhere, but it reminded me of ours here. There were no landmarks to
give me any indication, and I wondered about its relevance, especially
now, when so much of my life seem to lead me back to the sand, or the
beach.

Newton barked, making me jump, but alerting me to the footsteps
coming up the stairs. I quickly shoved the letters into the box and kicked
it under the bed. I wasn't ready to explain my pathetic crush with a

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mystery man just yet. I would eventually tell him, I just needed closure.

Edward stepped into the doorway, dripping wet from the rain and taking
a long drag on his cigarette. He'd been running, and his cheeks were
still pink from the exertion. I drank in his form lazily. His t-shirt clung to
the contours of his chest making my tongue swirl in my mouth. Droplets
of water had formed on his neck, and I desperately wanted a taste. His
running shorts hugged the muscles of his thighs, in the most tantalizing
of ways. I had to squeeze mine together to ease the instant throb at the
sight of him.

He pushed his wet hair from his eyes with his free hand and focused on
me.

"You OK?"

I nodded, trying not to look at the box under the bed.

"I can't believe you went running in the rain. You're drenched."

"Wanna undress me, BB?" he crooned, wiggling his brows playfully.

"Do you ever stop?" I giggled, secretly hoping he never would.

He leaned over and kissed my nose gently, before stubbing out his cig
and began to strip the clothes from his wet body. It was fascinating to
watch as his muscles rippled and the water dripped. I felt my nipples
bud and stomach clench.

Edward dumped the wet clothes on the floor and sat down next to me,
completely oblivious to his nakedness. He leaned into my side and
rested his head on my shoulder.

"Find anything interesting?"

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"No, just some stuff I needed to sort through. It's the last of it, I'm
officially moved in."

"Thank fuck for that," he sighed.

His wet hair was dripping down my chest, making me shiver.

"Edward!" I complained, trying to pull away.

"Huh?"

"You're all wet!"

He nuzzled my neck, making me hum with desire. His lips met my ear
and he whispered, "And here I was hoping you were the wet one."

His hand cupped my pussy over my jeans and his palm pushed against
me. I groaned, my head lolling onto his shoulder, as I began to throb.

"Wanna play, BB?"

"Are you not tired? You've been running," I replied, trying to focus on
anything other than what his hand was doing to me.

"Why do you think I do so much running?" he questioned, as he
continued to pepper my neck with kisses.

I gasped, when he pushed the seam of my jeans against my now, very
swollen clit.

"You... you have to work off all the garbage you eat somehow."

"No, no, no," he responded softly, licking the shell of my ear.

I turned into his embrace, and Edward immediately ran the tip of his
nose along my jaw and up to my lips.

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"I run to stop myself from pouncing on you every thirty seconds." He
breathed the words so seductively against my mouth that I'd have
collapsed if I'd been standing. "I would have you every moment of every
day, if you'd let me."

Oh, Christ. How could someone be unaffected by those words?

My legs opened, clearly having a will of their own, as his fingers began
to unbutton my jeans. With each pop of a button he kissed me, his
tongue delving further into my mouth with each one.

My hand moved, intending to halt his seduction, but instead it began
tickling his stomach and skimming slowly towards his very evident
erection. He could have me lost in seconds, and it always astounded
me. I'd read about this kind of need in books, but had never believed it
was real. I was very wrong.

I moaned and pushed my hips closer to him, when I felt his fingers
delve below the waistband of my underwear. They edged down slowly,
and I whined hoping he understood my need.

"Tell me, BB," he demanded.

My whole body was buzzing with desire, desperate to feel him filling me.
I knew I had to start to give him more. I'd been holding a part of myself
back, scared of getting hurt, but I trusted him. I knew deep within me
that he wouldn't hurt me the way Tyler had, and so I had to let go.

Or I would lose him.

I pulled my lips from his, staring directly into his glinting green eyes and
swallowed any anxiety, before stating, "Edward, I want you."

He smirked, but said nothing. He wanted more, so while I was still
feeling bold enough, I wrapped my fingers tightly around his cock and
said huskily, "Fuck me."

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He inhaled sharply, obviously not expecting those words to leave my
lips, and I watched in excitement as his pupils dilated. Suddenly, he was
on top of me, my back against the floor, as he kissed me hotly. His
tongue plundered my mouth, his hands pulling at my shirt. I giggled as
he cursed, trying to undo the buttons.

"Fuck it," he snarled, before tearing it open.

The little buttons scattered across the room, pinging off the mirror and
bouncing onto the floor. Edward didn't even acknowledge them, he was
too busy tugging down the cup of my bra and feasting on my breast. He
placed one long lick across my nipple, at the same time he pushed a
solitary finger into my aching pussy, making me writhe and buck on the
floor. He didn't give me a moment, though. He wanted it all, and he
wanted it now.

I groaned as he swirled his finger inside of me, removed it and quickly
thrust it back in. I was panting loudly from just one finger and given his
desperation right now, I knew this was only the start. I kept him to my
chest by threading my fingers into his wet hair and holding tightly. He
hissed and pushed into me harder. There was a hint of aggression in
his actions, but I wasn't scared, in fact with each flash of dominance I
got wetter and needier.

Edward began to curse again, when my panties and jeans got in his
way. He moved down my body with his tongue, licking between my
breasts and across my stomach. He laved my navel, until I squealed in
protest. It made him look up at me through his lashes; a predatory smirk
on his face.

Utterly fucking stunning.

I yelped when he removed his hand and tugged my clothes down my
legs with such force, I'm sure he left marks. His eyes were hooded and
seductive, as they drank me in. For the first time I didn't want to cover
myself from his inspection. I wanted him to see me; all of me.

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I sighed and arched my back, opening my legs for him. Edward licked
his lips, but stayed rigid kneeling at my ankles. His finger stroked across
my slit absently, never taking his eyes from mine.

"I'm going to taste you, and this time you're going to let me," he stated.

My insides twitched, wanting his mouth exactly where he promised to
put it. I nodded, adjusting my hips slightly, but frowned when he shook
his head.

"I want you to touch yourself first, honey."

My eyes went wide. I'd done it alone, but he wanted to see me touching
myself? I was feeling confident, but I wasn't sure I was feeling bold
enough to do that. I swallowed, and he obviously saw my hesitation. He
turned his chin up at me, and said gently, "Start with your tits. Cup them
in your hands, and show me just how you want to be touched."

I chewed on my lower lip, and moved my hands shakily to my breasts. I
wanted to close my eyes and block everything out, but that would upset
him. He wanted all of me with him when we made love, so I kept my
gaze on his and rolled my nipples between my fingers. He groaned
loudly, and took his cock in his palm, stroking himself with careful
precision. I couldn't tear my eyes away, it was beautiful to watch the
way he held himself and pumped his erection slowly. The more I stared
the braver I became, moving one hand from my breast across my torso
and over my stomach. Little rumbles of desire were exuding from his
chest, as tiny whimpers came from mine.

I could see his arousal glistening at the tip of his erection, as my fingers
reached my pussy.

"Yes, BB," he breathed.

The tone of his voice made me ache for more. I didn't want my fingers
running across my clit, I wanted his. However, the moment I saw what

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my actions were doing to him, I was consumed with desire. My skin
flamed and my whole body pulsed with a need so strong I was on the
brink of screaming. At that point it didn't matter who was touching my
clit, I just needed it.

I tugged harshly on my nipple, at the same time, circling my fingers into
my wetness and feeling my legs tremble. Edward was absorbed in my
actions, only making my lust worse each time he licked his lips. He
wasn't joking when he said he wanted a taste. He was practically
salivating. I dipped a finger inside myself, hoping to arouse him further,
and was startled by his actions.

He hissed, and slapped my hand out of the way, bringing his mouth
down harshly onto my sex. His tongue lapped, while his teeth nipped. It
was a divine kind of torture, especially when he thrust his fingers into
me at the same time. I was in complete rapture as his tongue delved
and his fingers fucked.

I was crying out his name, gasping for air. My legs wrapped around his
head and my hands pushed him closer to my pussy. Never had I felt
this lost. Edward made my body vibrate like no other. As he pushed his
fingers into me, his tongue would swirl around my clit and at the same
time his pinkie slipped between my cheeks and rocked against my ass.
Tyler had never touched me in such a way, but I wanted more. It was
complete rapture.

"Edward," I panted.

He gave one long slow lick, making me shudder, before gazing up at
me. The look on his face literally took my breath away. His cheeks were
rosy, green eyes twinkling and his lips swollen and wet. He looked like
pure sex, and I wanted him now. Badly. His fingers were still inside of
me, and he grinned devilishly as he wiggled them. Shivers ran from the
tip of my toes, all the way up to the ends of the hair on my head. I
babbled incoherently, before it turned to a whimper when he removed
them completely.

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"Tell me again," he demanded.

"Huh?" I muttered, trying to get a grasp on reality.

"Tell me again what you want me to do to you."

After everything we'd just done admitting that had never been easier. I
glared at him and said slowly, enunciating each word.

"Fuck. Me."

His brow quirked, as he covered my body with his.

"Feisty one, aren't we?"

"Not before I met you apparently," I uttered, as his lips connected with
mine.

His kiss was slow and thorough. I could taste my own sweet muskiness;
it was intoxicating.

"BB," he rumbled. "Get up. On your knees."

He shifted from over me, kneeing on the floor, and pulled a condom
from the dresser, as he waited for me to do the same. When I did, he
moved behind me, speaking quietly into my ear.

"Wrap your arms around my neck. Spread your legs a little wider; I need
to feel you."

I did as he asked, feeling his cock slid down my ass, and between my
thighs. My head fell back onto his shoulder, and he bit my neck,
entering me forcefully. I almost fell forwards, but he managed to keep
us upright. He rocked us as fast as the position would allow, and his
heavy breathing against my neck only added to my arousal. With each
exhale his breath floated across my sensitive skin making it prickle.

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"Christ, that's so fucking good. Home, BB. Home."

I was unsure what he meant, but realized before we'd started this, I'd
told him it had been my last box to unpack. He was happy I was home.

Edward skimmed his hand across the arm that I had wrapped around
his neck, until he got to my wrist. He pulled on it, moving my hand back
down towards my heated pussy. Entwining his fingers in mine, he
delved them between my lips towards my clit, both groaning when we
were enveloped in the wetness.

"Do it, honey. While I fill you. I just need to feel you cum."

There was a pleading tone to his words, but he didn't need to beg. I
would give him the world right now. So I continued to move our fingers
in my sex, as he thrust harshly into me. We became a hot mess of
grunts, groans, slapping skin and panting.

It was perfect, carnal sex.

Something I'd dreamed about a thousand times over, but had never
experienced until Edward. I knew in that moment that sex would never
be like this, unless it was with him.

It always came back to him.

"Fuck," Edward spat, as he pounded harder, leaning us forward.

I gripped the bed with my free hand, as our fingers pushed against my
clit. I felt him twitch inside of me, and he buried his face in my neck,
nuzzling it tenderly. His orgasm made his legs shake and my body hum
with need. I wanted that kind of completion. Edward knew it, and
continued his ministrations with me, even as his orgasm consumed him.
He whispered softly before the white heat built inside me and eventually
reached a crescendo. I closed my eyes, as the orgasm seared my body
from the inside out. I could feel Edward trailing little kissed down my

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spine, but couldn't focus. My thoughts were scattered, my breathing
labored.

I whimpered, as he pulled out of me, but continued to lean over the bed.
My knees hurt, and I had very little sensation in my legs. I began to
laugh loudly.

"BB, I fucking love you, but laughing right now is not good for the ego."

I stopped.

The room suddenly eerily quiet.

My heart crashed against my chest, and I was pretty sure that was the
only sound in the room, because neither of us could have been
breathing. I gulped, lifting my head from the mattress and looked at him.
He was watching me, waiting. Clearly, Mr. Confidant Masen was no
longer so fucking cocksure of himself.

"You...you?" was the best I could come up with.

He stood up, pulling the condom off and flinging it into the trash can,
before sitting on the bed next to me. He lifted me up and onto his lap,
and waited until we were looking at one another.

"What did I ever do to make you think I didn't love you?"

I snorted.

"Nice twist, Edward, but you need to work on your declarations a little
more."

He held my face between his palms and said softly, "Isabella Swan, I
love you. I've always loved you and there will never be anyone else for
me. When will you really fucking see that? You're mine, BB. Mine."

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I closed my eyes as the tears began to build and my lips started to
tremble.

He loved me.

I'd come here to find myself, but had found Edward.

My throat closed with emotion. I wanted so badly to be able to say it
back, but I couldn't. As much as I convinced myself I was a new, more
confident Bella, there was a part of me that screamed to be left locked
away; to make sure no one hurt me as badly as Tyler had done. If I
opened my heart to Edward, I was technically giving him a knife and
hoping that he didn't shred what was left of it.

"I know you're struggling to come to terms with what we are, and I
understand that. Why do you think I haven't said the words a thousand
times a day? I just want you to know there's no doubt for me, and I'm
here."

He kissed me then, taking away any fear and doubt. He shuffled us
around the bed, never taking his lips from mine, as he rested against
the headboard. Sadness still swirled in my stomach when we broke
apart. I knew I was hurting him by not returning the sentiment, but I
simply wasn't ready.

I rested my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. His fingers
combed my hair gently, lulling me into a sated daze.

"Edward," I whispered.

I felt the hum in his chest rather than heard it. It rumbled across my
body, making me shiver and break out in goose bumps.

"Your tattoo? You never got around to telling me."

"I did," he replied cautiously. "I said you could read it."

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I slapped his chest playfully. He knew I wanted him to tell me. I knew
what it said. I also knew what it looked like.

"OK," he moaned and linked my fingers in his. "It says 'Building
Sandcastles'."

He wasn't lying, but it was the way the words were inked across his
shoulder, that had caught my attention. The B for building and S for
sandcastle were in bold and a slightly different font than the rest of the
letters. They were my initials. Was I that self absorbed that I thought the
tattoo was about me?

"Why?" I asked timidly.

"It reminds me of being younger. Of the summers. Of Aro."

I could feel him shrugging, as if it was nothing and completely
inconsequential. I didn't believe him, but why would he need to lie when
he'd just told me he loved me? Edward was becoming more
complicated by the day. Maybe Granddad was right, Edward wasn't
what he appeared. There was so much more to him, things I'd yet to
discover.

The most amazing revelation was that I truly wanted to. I wanted to
know everything there was to know about Edward Masen. I just had to
get over myself; I was the problem here, not him.

I kissed his chest and asked him when he'd had it done.

"About two years ago. I forget it's there most of the time."

I didn't believe that either, but decided to drop it.

His hand ran down my spine, eventually cupping my ass, and
squeezing softly.

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"I need a shower, honey. Fancy joining me?"

I didn't have much of a choice, because seconds later he picked me up
and carried me to the bathroom. I hoped Alice was still in the bus. Being
interrupted by her and Jasper was the last thing I needed right now. We
showered, taking our time to wash each other, and eventually I'd ended
up back on my knees, this time he was inside my mouth. We'd only left
the bathroom because the water had finally gone cold. Edward had
wrapped us up in bathrobes and cuddled me as we walked downstairs.

Alice was in the kitchen eyeing us nervously. She wasn't talking, and
even though I didn't really know her, it felt off. Edward pulled my back to
his front, wrapping his arms around my shoulders, and grinding his hips
into my ass. I giggled but couldn't stop the feeling that something was
wrong. I slapped his arm, as he kissed my cheek.

"Hey, Ali. The bus was rocking, so I..."

She held up her hand and shook her head, silencing him. My guts
churned, something was definitely up.

"Um, BB," she started cautiously. "Your cell rang before. I answered it."

"That's fine. Who was it, did they leave a message?"

Edward's arms tightened around me, as Alice dropped her eyes to the
floor.

"It was your Mom. She's coming here, Bella. She was so pissed. I'm so
sorry."

Fuck.

Oops...

Thanks to you all xxx

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Edit: Bella is not blind, or stupid. She states that she doesn't
believe him with his explaination of the tattoo.

Please don't leave a review asking that, getting over 300 reviews
stating the same thing does not make me want to continue writing.
Bear that in mind. I am a real person.

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18. Chapter 18: Interlude

Thanks to everyone still reading and reviewing. I heart you all for
it!

Love to my betas Maylin & Twirlgrrl ... MUAH xx

SM owns all things Twilight.

EPOV

I didn't see it as lying to her. I just hadn't told her exactly who I was. I
didn't really have a reason why, it was just important for me to keep a
small part of myself locked away until she really accepted what we
were. I hoped she'd guess, but after finding her little box of secrets,
when hunting for my boot, I realized she had no idea who Anthony
Swanning truly was. She clearly harbored something for him.

That first letter I'd received through my agent had stunned me, and I'd
read it so many times now, that I could quote it word for word. I'd written
six replies, each of them telling her who I was. I discarded every single
one, and instead opted for formal but friendly ambiguity. I wanted her to
find out, for her to be intrigued or desperate enough to find me. She was
clearly drawn to me, even through my words, and that only added to my
resolve. She was the one.

My only one.

I'd hoped the picture of the sandcastle would be the huge push that
would break the mental walls, but again, I was disappointed.
Realistically, I knew I put too much hope on my Bella; she was too
young to remember me like I remembered her. But when your whole life
centered on one person, whether they knew about it or not, you couldn't
help it. She was home, my home, and there wasn't a hope in hell I was
letting her go again.

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I'd lost my composure with her at the barbeque, but only because she
hadn't thought to tell me that she would be leaving for a few days. I felt
like I wasn't important enough for her to tell. Of course, I knew already,
and maybe it could be construed as manipulative, but it wasn't. I just
wanted to her to open up more. She'd shown very little real interest in
my writing, or my life here without her.

It hurt.

All I wanted was for BB to give me something other than her body.

My hopes had soared when she had asked about my tattoo. To me it
was as plain as day what the B and S stood for, but she accepted my
lukewarm explanation so readily. I could see in her eyes she was
thinking something, but she refused to tell me exactly what it was that
was running through her head. It was frustrating to watch her struggle,
but I knew she had to figure it out herself. Anthony Swanning was a little
mystery she'd enjoyed, I just prayed I wouldn't disappoint when she
came face to face with the answer.

I'd told her I was going for a run, but in truth, I was sitting on the beach
throwing sticks for Newton, and working my way through a full pack of
cigarettes. I was at war with myself, not knowing what to do for the best.
If I told her everything, the tattoo, my pen name and exactly how I felt
about her, I would be giving her everything. There would be nothing for
me to hold onto.

Nothing left if she walked away from me.

However, by keeping those things to myself I was protecting my heart
and would know she really wanted me when she discovered the truth.

"Hiding out here won't help you."

I turned to the sound of Alice's cheery voice, and huffed, flicking the
cigarette stub across the beach.

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"I'm not hiding. You found me, and I bet you weren't even looking."

She came to sit down beside me and rested her head on my shoulder.

"I was actually."

"Well, congrats, you found me. Get bored of the gardener already?"

She giggled and shoved her body against mine playfully.

"He's amazing. Just so you know."

"Just be careful, Ali." I warned. "Laurent hurt you, and it's not really like
you to fall head first."

"I will," she grumbled. "But you of all people should understand the
knowing."

"Huh?"

"Knowing they're the one. You should be able to help me out here." Her
smile was wide, and she looked genuinely happy.

I snorted.

"I wish I could. I'm in a bit of a quandary myself. I think I'm the last
person to give advice on relationships."

"Are you kidding me?" she shrieked, turning her head to glare at me.

"Nope. I think I messed up. I'm stuck and have no fucking clue what to
do next."

She frowned, obviously confused by my confession. I threw a stick
towards the waves, watching him as he raced off into the water.

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"Anthony Swanning," I whispered.

"Ah, now I understand. She's still not done the math and that pisses you
off. Grow up, Edward! She has always been a part of your life, but I'm
afraid you weren't a part of hers. She moved on, not realizing the impact
she had on your life. Don't hate her for that."

"I could never hate her," I spat; truly annoyed that she could ever think
that.

"Yeah, I get that already. Calm down. What I'm trying to say is don't
hold it against her for not thinking of you for every waking hour of every
day. Just remember, everything she has done has brought her back
here to you," she stated, before returning her head to my shoulder.

"Very profound. Now, do I tell her?"

"I think you need to ask yourself why you don't want to."

I lit another cig, and took a huge drag before stating, "I already know
that."

"And?"

"I want her to find out herself. I want her to discover that after all this
time I'm the one that's been writing to her. That I'm the one sending the
photos, and that it's my books she adores."

"Selfish!" Alice snarled, moving away from me again. I was getting
fucking whiplash.

"Why?" I asked, completely taken aback by her haughtiness.

Her blue eyes pierced mine, as she shoved at my shoulder, making me
drop my cig onto the sand.

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"How the hell is she supposed to know that? Seriously, Edward, get
over yourself! I know you love her, though you haven't..."

"I told her last night," I interrupted, but she waved my comment away
and continued.

"Why are you making this so difficult? Tell her! I'm pretty sure she'll be
happy to know you've actually been communicating all these years. I
personally think she won't feel as swamped by all the emotions, but
that's just my take. I understand you want her to make the great big
discovery because to you, it will prove she wants you. The things is,
Edward, why does it? For crying out loud, she let you live in her house
when she knew nothing about you. She's put her faith in a stranger,
even though her heart has been broken. Open your fucking eyes!"

"They are open," I snarled.

She huffed in response, clearly not agreeing with me.

"Anyway, seeing as you're determined to be a complete ass about this,
I'll just tell you why I was looking for you, and leave. You can brood
away on the beach."

"I wasn't..."

"Yes," she nodded. "...you were. Anyway, BB has finally managed to
talk to Renee. She is determined to come here, but after Bella explained
she was working away for a few days, Renee has decided to leave it
until next week. She's pissed, and is most definitely gunning for the two
of us, but she's willing to wait until Bella's back. Won't that be fun?" she
added sarcastically.

"Oh, I can't wait."

Alice stood and dusted the sand from her dress.

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"Speaking of fun, the second part to why I was looking for you. We're all
leaving in about thirty minutes. There's some small fair thingy going on
where Jasper lives in Forks. We thought it'd be fun. Are you coming?"

I winced at her, not really in the mood to throw darts at silly little targets.

"Don't stay here feeling sorry for yourself. BB's waiting. She wants to
go, and I think you should be the adoringly cute boyfriend, and win her a
huge fucking teddy."

She kissed my forehead before strolling back towards the house. Was I
really making a big deal out of this, and torturing myself with something
that could be easily resolved? Would she be, like Alice said, happy with
my revelation? My heart sank a little, because I knew I wouldn't be
happy with just blurting it out. She'd thought of Anthony Swanning a lot
over the years, and I didn't know what she'd dreamed about him, what
she'd hoped for. A small voice inside my head told me that was
irrelevant because Bella Swan was mine, and therefore she was
Anthony Swanning's too.

Newton came rushing at me, wet and dirty, breaking me from my
thoughts. He barked loudly, wanting more attention, but right now, all I
wanted was to feel BB in my arms. I stood, collected my cigs, and
whistled for the dog to follow.

Jasper was on the front porch, sitting on the steps as I approached the
house. He looked at me cautiously, and nodded his head in
acknowledgement. I raised my brows, before stating, "You only get one
warning from me. Hurt Ali and I will hunt you down. Got it?"

"Duly noted, but you won't need to."

Warning given, I said nothing further, and walked into the house, taking
the stairs two at a time. Bella was in the bedroom with her back to me.
She was wearing a short beige shirt dress that pulled nicely across her
ass. I leaned against the doorjamb and drunk my fill of her body while

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she was unaware. It was only when I saw what she was actually doing
that I began to panic.

Bella was packing her clothes into a suitcase.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I hissed.

She spun around, her hair flying in a dark curtain around her face, as
she looked at me in shock.

"Er...packing my clothes for Seattle. We leave in the morning and as
we're going to this little carnival thing, I thought I'd do it now. What's
your problem?"

Fuck!

I walked over, hanging my head in shame, and pulled the best 'puppy
dog' face I could. I wrapped my arms around her waist, and tugged her
closer. She was stiff and clearly pissed at me.

"Sorry, I was an asshat. I shouldn't have said it like that. My only excuse
is that you scared me. Forgive me?" I pouted.

She shoved at my chest, but I held her firmly.

"No, I don't."

She ruined it by smiling, and then cupping my face in her hands.

"Edward, I'm going nowhere. I told you about Seattle; you're coming
with me, so please chill out. This is my home now."

"I'm sorry," I repeated, but it wasn't enough. I knew that.

"Edward, you need to work through this whole issue of me leaving. You
got annoyed at the barbeque because I told you I was going, but I don't

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know how else to tell you that I'm going nowhere."

She tried to pull away, but again I held her rigid. I couldn't let her go.

"I...I have a problem when it comes to you, and I have no idea how to
communicate it effectively," I whispered.

She frowned a little and tilted her head, waiting for me to elaborate. I
swallowed. Admitting my vulnerabilities was not something I'd done
before, and certainly not to someone who could bring me to my knees.

"I told you how I felt, though to be honest I have no idea why you
questioned that anyway, but I don't think you really understand. There
have been points in my life that I've needed reassurance or help, and
there was only one person there for me. Aro. I find it difficult believing
that you're here to stay."

"Edward, I..."

"Please," I stopped her. "Let me finish."

She nodded, but stroked my finger across my cheek, giving me comfort.

"Alice pointed out what a complete ass I was being with you. You've
been a part of my life, even though you weren't here, and I never really
gave you a chance to digest that. I think I've kind of suffocated you. For
that I'm truly sorry. I tried BB, I tried so hard to give you space.
Remember, I told you that you wouldn't be ready for certain answers,
like the tattoo? That was me giving you time to adjust, to get used to
how I felt about you. See, I'm not a total selfish bastard."

"So, the tattoo? The B and S are for me?" she asked cautiously.

I nodded and braced myself for her complete horror. To my amazement
she moved forward and kissed my lips. It was slow and thorough and
made my knees weak. Hope coursed through my body, Bella wasn't

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rejecting me. In fact, it sounded like she'd worked the tattoo out almost
as soon as she'd acknowledged it.

I sucked on her lower lip gently, before finally letting go. Her eyes were
assessing me warily.

"Hmm, you taste of smoke. You weren't running. Why didn't you just tell
me the tattoo was about me?"

I snorted, and pulled her onto the bed, sitting her on my lap.

"Come on, BB. How would you have reacted? Some guy you barely
know tells you he has your initials permanently inked on his shoulder,
really?"

"OK, yeah, I'd have run screaming from here, but that doesn't excuse
you for not telling me when I asked."

She placed her hand over my heart and stared directly at me.

"Thank you for telling me now. It is a little daunting, but I'm sort of
pleased."

I grinned at her, kissing her nose quickly.

"And for the record, I will try and give you more space. I'm sorry."

"Thank you. I just need to adjust to this, Edward. I'm not telling you I
don't want this; that I don't want you, because I do, but you're so strong
willed. You seem to know me so well, and it scares me. In all the years I
was with Tyler, he never knew me like you do, and all I'm asking is for
time and space to get to know you the same way. Can you let me in?"
she asked softly.

"Same goes, BB." I retorted. "You haven't been too forthcoming with the
goods."

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"Oh, and here I was thinking you'd tasted the goods a few time now,"
she replied seductively.

I squeezed her waist, and kissed her, before gesturing towards the
door.

"We'd better stop, or you won't be in any state to go to the fair with Ali."

"Are you coming?" she asked, climbing off my knee, and collecting her
purse.

"I can, if you want me too."

"Edward," she whined.

"Seriously, BB, weren't we just talking about space? I will happily come
with you, if you want me to. However, I will be just as happy staying
here to cook dinner, for when you return."

A sly smirk played across her pink glossy lips, as she looked at me
teasingly through the top of her lashes. I wanted to bend her over and
bury myself inside her until we both hurt. She was so fucking beautiful.

"I do like the idea of you making dinner, but I'd prefer you with me.
Please come with us today, the four of us could have so much fun," she
pleaded. "I want a day where I can forget about my mother, and you
make me do that."

She didn't need to ask again. I could refuse her nothing. We walked
down the stairs hand in hand, and drove to Forks with Alice and Jasper
necking like teenagers in the back.

/ T \\

"Do you want a corndog, Bella?" Jasper asked softly.

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She shook her head at him, cuddling closer to my side and rubbing at
my stomach.

"I bet Edward will though."

I kissed the top of her head and covered her hand with mine.

"Yes, thanks Jasper."

I watched as he and Alice strolled over to the little stall, both cuddled as
close together as me and Bella. I had to admit, we were having fun. It
was great to be out, with her holding my hand and showing the world
that she was with me. I'd imagined us doing this so many times, but
nothing compared to what it felt like actually doing it. I'd fed her cotton
candy, then licked her lips and kissed her fiercely. She'd tasted sugary
sweet, but it was pure BB.

She'd won a pink plastic heart ring on the stupid hooking a duck game.
She made my heart melt when she took my hand and placed it onto my
pinkie finger. I'd kissed her with everything I had, making the teenagers
walking past us giggle. It was still there now. I never wanted to remove
it. I was head over heels in love with her, and so fucking happy.

I had to admit, Jasper seemed very taken with Alice. It eased my worry,
and made me feel much better about leaving them alone. I was
extremely protective of her. She no longer had Aro, and I'd promised
him I'd take care of her and Bella.

"So, Alice seems very happy with Jaz."

I hugged her closer, as we walked towards a vacant bench.

"Yeah, but he's had the warning. No one messes with her or you for that
matter," I replied sternly.

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She tried to sit onto the wooden slats of the bench, but I quickly took her
place and pulled her onto my lap. She giggled and patted my cheek.
Her soft skin felt wonderful against my whiskers, and I simply stared at
her, enjoying our moment.

"You're so beautiful, Bella."

She blushed and tried to hide her face behind her hair, but I cupped her
cheek, tilting her towards me. She looked crestfallen, and I didn't
understand why.

"Bella?"

I felt her throat constrict as she swallowed against my wrist. Before she
whispered, "I don't believe you."

"You don't see yourself at all. I wish I could show you what you look like
to me. Perfect. Do you trust me?"

My heart thundered as I waited for her response. I needed her to say
yes, otherwise I knew there would be no hope for this, and all those
years would have been lost.

"I do," she stated confidently.

I kissed her quickly on the lips, making her frown slightly. I grinned and
continued to speak.

"No matter what anyone has ever told you, or how they made you feel,
I'm telling you that you're stunning. If you trust me, then trust that I'm
telling you the truth."

"Your glasses are rose tinted," she replied quietly.

"No, BB, they're not. You're view is very jaded, but I will change that.
The day you tell me you love me I'll know I've succeeded."

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Bella opened her mouth to speak, when Alice and Jasper returned with
corndogs and soda.

"So, what are you going to win for me?" Alice asked, her gaze darting
from Jasper to me.

"Oh, no, Ali, my days as your slave are over. All my winnings are now
reserved for BB. You'll have to see your man for that." I looked at Bella
and smirked at her. "Want me to get you a big teddy, honey?"

A small blush still stained her cheeks, as she whispered into my ear,
"Don't make it too big. There isn't room in our bed for three."

In that instant there was no one around us, they faded into
insignificance. All that mattered was her true declaration that it was our
bed. I hadn't tickled her to get her to say it. She meant it. I kissed her
ferociously, holding her hair in my hands and plunging my tongue into
her mouth. My love for her consumed my very soul. That was one small
thing was enough to give me hope that I was getting through; that she
was beginning to understand.

A low whistle broke us from our passion. I realized Bella was gripping
tightly to my t-shirt, and had adjusted herself on my lap so that she
could grind against me.

"Guys..." Jasper warned.

I cupped her chin with my fingers, caressing her swollen lower lip with
my thumb.

"Can we shelve this for later? Me. You. Our bed?"

Her tongue darted out and licked at the tip of my thumb, before sucking
on it. My trousers tented instantly. I'd always thought she was oblivious
to what she did to me, but the more I was around her, the bolder she
got.

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"Guys!" Jasper snapped.

Bella kissed me quickly and climbed off my lap. She stood in front of me
but moved her hand between our bodies and rubbed her palm again my
cock.

Holy Fuck!

Bella laughed sneakily, before linking her fingers in mine and pulling me
towards a booth. It had an assortment of Hello Kitty, Garfield and Power
Puff girl stuffed toys hanging from it. I could hear Alice giggling at our
very public display, and I grinned smugly at her. I was stunned by what
she'd done, and we hadn't been exactly secluded. Alice had seen it.

"I want one," Bella purred into my ear, pointing to the large Hello Kitty.

I looked at the pyramid of wooden milk bottles and nodded. I could
knock them down. Jasper stood beside me, assessing them just as I
was. We smirked at one another, raising our brows in silent competition,
and held our cash out to the vendor.

Alice stood to Jaspers left, whereas BB took her place behind me,
holding my hips and nuzzling my back. I was going to lose it if she
continued like that, but I couldn't bring myself to tell her to move. I tilted
my head a little, allowing her to see over my shoulder, as I raised my
arm, preparing to throw the little ball. Her breath tickled my neck as her
hands pushed into my front pockets, her fingers tickling my crotch. The
ball landed to the right of the pyramid. Not a single one was even
wobbling.

Fuck!

Just as I was digesting my complete fail, Jasper tossed his ball directly
into his targets, making them all tumble to the ground.

Double fuck!

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Alice squealed, bouncing on her tiptoes and clapping her hands in
delight. The man behind the booth pointed to the toys, as Alice chose a
pink Power Puff girl. She kissed him chastely on the cheek, making him
shove his hands into the front pockets of his jeans and blush bright pink.
I, on the other hand was thoroughly pissed. I hadn't even hit one. Bella
must have sensed my mood, because she hugged me tightly and
kissed my back between my shoulder blades.

"Let's try another. I put you off," she said in consolation. "What do you
fancy?"

"You, BB. Only ever you."

She blinked, as if something had hit her, and in reality I guess it had.

"You really mean that, don't you? I mean, it's not some line you give me
every now and again to make me smile?"

I spun in her arms, hoping to get it through to her. She seemed
incapable of understanding the depth of my feelings for her, even
though I'd tried to make it abundantly clear.

"Yes, I mean it. I always knew you were mine, made solely for me.
When I tell you I've always wanted you, I'm deadly serious. I've
explained this to you before. From that moment I turned your sandcastle
to mush, BB; that exact moment. I know it sounds crazy, because we
were so young, and if I could, I'd tell you how I knew. The problem is I
don't know how, I just did."

Her eyes welled with tears. It confused me, because I thought I'd been
pretty clear about my feelings towards her, however, it appeared she
had taken all of that as a joke, or nothing more than a little flirting.

"BB..."

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She placed her finger across my lips, stopping me from saying anything
more, and simply gazed at me. Her brown eyes moved across my
features slowly, as if trying to see something that would prove me to be
a liar. The silence was pure torture. Those three words were on the tip
of my tongue, waiting to be spoken again, in the hope of getting her to
understand.

"I've been so blind. I'm sorry," she whispered.

I wanted to kiss her.

I wanted to take her home.

I wanted to devour every inch of her.

But I didn't.

I placed a small kiss on her lips and took her hand in mine.

"Let's go and win you a fucking huge silly toy; one that will make Ali
green with jealousy. That will really piss her off, because she hates
green."

We strolled towards another booth. I could see Alice and Jasper
standing mouths open, trying to take in what had just happened. I knew
Alice would be more shocked that I didn't maul her where we stood, but
Bella needed normality. She needed these little interludes to be able to
deal with my confidence, and the intensity of my feelings for her. I could
wait. We'd have three full days in a hotel room in Seattle soon enough.

Then I would have my time with her.

...next stop... SEATTLE!

There will be no updates next week- for any of my fics. I'm taking
Xmas off.

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First Edition will still update tomorrow.

HAPPY CHRISTMAS!

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19. Chapter 19: Honesty

Hope everyone had a great Xmas and NewYear.

Thanks to my betas - Maylin & Twirlgrrl, and my pre reader
hunterhunting. I adore you all.

Special thanks to my darling elusivekoolaid. Just because.

...and onto Seattle...

SM owns all things Twilight.

BPOV

If someone could give you a timeline of your life there would be points
on it that altered your very existence. A moment in time when
everything changed and you saw the world through fresh eyes.

Seattle was one of my points.

I thought I knew who I was. I thought I knew who Edward was, and
where we were heading.

I was very wrong.

The moment I stepped into the hotel suite expecting to find Anthony
Swanning was the moment my world was turned upside down.

The car ride to Seattle and our hotel was a little tense, and I didn't really
know why. I assumed it was the threat of my mother arriving while I
wasn't at the house. It did worry me that she would do that, but Alice
had promised to call me the moment anything unusual happened. I
trusted her to look after my little house.

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I was fraught with nerves. I was going to interview Anthony, knowing he
would remember me from my correspondence. I hoped he didn't think I
was some raging lunatic, or a sick stalker. His letters had been friendly
enough, but it still worried me just what he thought of me. I would have
to keep the interview as professional as possible. I had planned plenty
of questions, and hoped he would let me take a picture. I was fairly
certain he wouldn't, as he seemed to like his anonymity. None of his
books had images on them, and for me to have a photograph of what
he really looked like would be a huge leap of faith. He didn't know me
well enough to allow me that luxury.

I'd brought his letters and the picture of the sandcastle. I didn't have a
valid reason why, because he obviously knew he'd written them. I'd
vowed to stay quiet about them until he mentioned them though.

Edward had seen just how nervous I was and had tried to ease my
anxiety. He attempted to massage my shoulders, but I'd shaken him off,
claiming he was hurting me. He'd then tried to arouse me, but my mind
was elsewhere, so that hadn't worked either. Eventually, he'd kissed me
and told me he was going to check out the gym. He claimed he was
giving me the space I needed. I knew he was really just getting out of
my way because I was being mean to him.

I'd promised myself I'd make it up to him later.

I just didn't realize at the time exactly what form that would take.

/ T \\

My heart pounding, I knocked on the hotel room door and waited. I
could hear shuffling inside and was greeted by a willowy brunette when
the door opened.

"Ms. Swan?" she questioned politely.

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I smiled and held my hand out for her to take. She looked down at it and
grimaced, before turning tail and walking into the room. I was taken
aback by her abruptness, but I wasn't here to see her. I was here to
interview my favorite author.

"Take a seat. Mr Swanning will be with you in a moment. He's just
cleaning up."

I frowned. He knew what time our meeting was, so why would he decide
to clean up now? I did as she asked and sat on the edge of the pristine
tan leather couch.

I waited.

All the while, getting more and more irritated with Mr. Swanning. I was
fairly certain there would be someone scheduled in after me, so the
longer he took to appear the shorter I had to interview him. After twenty
minutes I got so annoyed I stood up, and was about to try and find his
assistant when I heard movement in the bathroom.

I swallowed my anxiety and sat back down. As the door opened I began
to speak, but the words were swiftly lost in the air around me, when I
caught a glimpse of bronze hair.

"Mr. Swanning, it's a pleasure..."

I was momentarily stunned. Only one person had hair that color.

Edward.

But I'd left him back at our hotel in the gym, and couldn't comprehend
what he was doing here, in Anthony Swanning's suite. I opened and
closed my mouth, not knowing where to start, because he turned to face
me, and I saw it really was him.

"Edward, what are you...?" I whispered.

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His expression was cautious, and he wasn't quite meeting my gaze. He
never hid from me; that was one thing that always annoyed him about
me, so why was he so nervous now? His hair was wet from the shower,
and he wore nothing but a pair of low slung, unbuttoned jeans. A small
white hotel towel was slung around his neck. He looked delectable, but
what the hell was going on?

"BB," he breathed walking towards me.

I shrank back on the leather, completely confused. He came to sit
beside me, running the backs of his fingers over my cheek.

"BB, it's me."

"I know that!" I huffed. "But I'm not here to see you. I left you at the
hotel. I'm here to interview Anthony. I don't need looking after, nor do I
appreciate your jealousy. I can take care of myself, as you damn well
know. Edward why are you in his room?"

He closed his eyes for a moment, as if mustering the courage to say
something. Dread began to build. This was something huge, and I
wasn't sure I was going to like it.

"Look at me," he demanded gently. "It's me. Anthony."

"What?"

Edward took my hands in his and for the first time since we'd been
together on the beach, I felt them tremble.

"I'm Anthony Swanning. Me."

I shook my head in complete denial. He was just fooling with me now.
Obviously he knew Anthony and they'd cooked this up between them.
That was the only possible explanation. Wasn't it?

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"You need to stop playing, because I don't have time for this. Where is
he?" I stated harshly.

"BB, you need..."

"No!" I yelled. "You need to stop it and tell me!"

I stood and began pacing the room, hoping my shouts would make his
assistant come to see what was happening.

"I am telling you! So many times I've tried to tell you, but I just didn't
really know how. I knew the moment you understood, that things would
change. Not just for you, but between us, and I was so happy the way
we were evolving. I was fucking ecstatic that you'd come home, BB.
Where you belonged. With me."

"You're lying. Edward, there is no way you can be him," I snorted.
"You're just making this shit up. I can't believe this...this bullshit."

"Why not?" he snarled, moving to stand in front of me. "Why? Because I
don't fit into your fantasy, is that it?"

"What fantasy? What are you talking about?" I replied, panicking.

This was all wrong. I turned, trembling, and started to walk from the
room. There was no way it could be him. He'd obviously found my
memory box, and had decided to use it against me. He'd been
snooping, and that annoyed me.

I'd reached for the door handle, my guts churning with hurt, when he
covered my hand in his and stated into my hair, "Please don't leave me,
BB. Let me explain."

"Explain what? What?" I spat. "Go ahead, but I can tell you now I'm
really fucking pissed at you."

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"I can see that!" he replied, raising his brows at my cursing.

I glared at him defiantly, waiting for him to elaborate. He took hold of my
shoulders and made me face him. His green eyes were sharp gems,
focused on me, wanting to convey as much as he could.

"The letters? The pictures? The books? BB, I sent them. Me. Edward
Masen, not some silly nonexistent writer. I know you still have them."

I shook my head again, trying to understand why he was doing this, but
I could tell he wasn't lying to me. I knew Edward. I just couldn't allow
myself to accept it was that simple. Edward couldn't be him, because
that would make everything too easy. I'd been in love with my past and
my present, because they'd been the same person.

I realized I was still shaking my head, and Edward was staring at me in
concern. The dots were connecting in my head, but I refused to believe
it. It simply wasn't possible.

Edward pulled me back down onto the couch trying to bring me close to
him. I stiffened and tried to pull away, but his grip was too strong, and
where he was concerned, I had little will power. His arms wrapped
protectively around me. My head rested on his damp chest, and I could
hear his heart racing as fast as mine was. He was trying to appear
calm, but the pounding told me otherwise.

"It isn't...you can't be...I...," I moaned, knowing just how weak my voice
sounded.

"BB, I sent you clues, but you didn't really remember me. I sent you
letters, but when you still didn't question it, I sent that damn picture.
Sandcastles. Damn!" he growled. "Fucking sandcastles. You're mine,
and always will be."

"I don't understand, Edward. You're seriously telling me you're Anthony
Swanning and we've been communicating for years? Really?"

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He cupped my face between his palms, bringing us almost nose to
nose.

"You know in your heart that what I'm saying is true. You're so fucking
stubborn. That bastard broke you so badly, and even though you act so
strong and confident, you aren't. I don't lie to you; I can't. Look at me
and know that what I'm saying is the truth. I'm Anthony Swanning. I'm
the one who's been writing to you. I'm the one that wants you, and I'm
the one that loves you so fucking much it really does hurt."

"Love shouldn't hurt," I whispered.

"It only hurts because you're letting it. Your refusal to accept me is
what's hurting, not the emotion I feel for you. Bella, if you told me today
you didn't want me, and that you wanted me to leave, I'd go but I know
you don't want that. I see it in your face, feel it in your touch, but you
refuse to give me much more than your body. I don't like that. I won't
use you."

I groaned, rubbing my temples. They were throbbing with the tension.

"So, you're telling me that I wrote to you? That the sandcastle was on
our beach, and that your tattoo really is for me?"

"Yes," he sighed. "Yes, yes, yes. Christ, BB, even the pseudonym is for
you. Swanning? You seriously didn't see that?"

I shook my head, and felt a tear fall. I hadn't even realized I was that
close to tears.

"Anthony?"

"My middle name, but then you probably didn't know that, right?"

My head hurt. I'd been so closed off that I'd even shut out Edward. He
was right; I'd given my body to him, but hadn't been willing to give

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anything more. I'd blocked out any hints that would make me question
him, because I didn't want to be hurt again. I couldn't carry on like this. I
was hurting myself, and Edward, with what I was doing. I had to make a
choice.

I smiled a little, knowing I'd made that decision last week in our
bedroom. I'd also affirmed it here. I loved Edward Masen, not Anthony
Swanning, but now I would get to do both. The one multi faceted man
had changed me in so many ways, I worried how I would live up to his
expectations, but I knew I'd try. I couldn't lose him over my own
insecurities.

"Why didn't you just tell me? In one of the letters? Or when I bought
your books? You let me buy your books!" I said incredulously.

"I'll refund you," he snorted.

It made me giggle. I should have been pissed with him, but the way he
made light of my argument actually made me smile, and lightened the
mood.

"Why didn't you just come out and tell me at the start? Because you
obviously knew it was me."

"I did, and yes, I realize I should've, but at the time I was so fucking
excited that you were writing to me and telling me just how much my
book affected you, I didn't think clearly. I guess I liked the idea of you
being enamoured with the reclusive Anthony Swanning. As time wore
on I wanted you to want me so bad, that you'd search for me."

"But I didn't know you! Why would I come looking for you when I had no
clue who you really were?" I moaned. "The stupid thing is, I did look for
you. I spent weeks hunting the internet and calling in favors but no one
had any idea. You hid yourself very well."

"So you believe me?" he questioned, his whole body rigid. Waiting.

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"I have no choice but to. This was so fucking unfair for you to do it this
way, Edward."

He stroked the hair from my cheeks and grimaced.

"I know. I'm sorry. I just had no idea how to raise it. 'Surprise' didn't
seem to cover it."

"Who knows?" I sighed wearily. I suddenly felt exhausted, and wanted
nothing more than to curl up and sleep.

"Alice, that's all. Emm and Rose know I'm an author but have no idea
who I am. Aro was the only other person."

I small part of me felt betrayed, but the overall feeling was relief. I didn't
have to feel guilty for feeling something for Anthony Swanning, and I
didn't have to say goodbye to him so I could love Edward. He wasn't
going to get let off that easily though. I wasn't going to tell him right now
how I felt.

"Why did you leave it until we came here? Do you know how fucked up
that is?" I asked angrily.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know how to explain it. I was wrong, but then so were
you."

I glared up at him, ready to defend myself, regardless of what it was for.

"You..." he stated tapping my nose. "...kept that little box and me a
secret. Why would you do that, BB?"

His brows were raised, but his tone was teasing and playful. I got the
feeling he knew exactly what I was hiding, but I wasn't giving it to him
right now. He was lucky I was still in the same room as him after the
epic stunt he pulled on me.

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I sighed loudly, making Edward hold me closer, and kiss my temple.

"I'm sorry, so sorry. But now do you see why we are meant to be
together? Everything we do leads us back to one another. Everything.
You have to see that. Honey, you've closed yourself off from so much,
but I want you to really see what's in front of you now. Please?"

He had a point. Whenever we'd done something, I'd compared it to what
had previous occurred with Tyler. If I wanted to give this with Edward a
try, then I'd need to cut ties to Tyler. They were all mental ones now, as
I had no other reason to contact him. I had to do the work myself. I
thought I was making a fresh start when I arrived here, or even before
that when I'd signed the divorce papers, but that was a lie. I was still
tied to him, and would never be completely happy until I got rid of the
rotten past. There were a few moments I could look back and smile at,
but on the whole I remembered it all with a dark disdain. It was all
clouded in the memory of finding him on his knees and pleasing
someone that wasn't me; his wife.

"I think..." I started softly. "...that we need to talk, maybe more me than
you, because as you've said, you've been basically honest with me."

"Do you want to go back to our hotel?" he whispered into my hair.

I snorted.

"You're joking, right? This place is so much better than ours! In fact, I
think you should get your little assistant to move our things into here."

"Oh, so you like the perks my alter ego gets? I see, you're only with me
for the extras, like expensive hotel rooms."

I giggled, and turned in his lap, straddling his hips. He held my face
between his palms and gazed adoringly at me. He really was stunning
to look at.

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"I love you, BB. I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy. You know I
mean that."

Tears stung the back of my eyes. This was unbelievable. He was the
man I'd fantasized about, just like I was the one he dreamed of.
Ultimately every path I took, had led me to this man, and back to a
place I thought was in my past. I couldn't deny the pull towards not only
Edward, but the house, and even Alice. I felt whole and happy at the
house. It was as if we all belonged there, and the only doubt I'd ever
had was now resolved. Edward was the man that I secretly lusted over;
I just hadn't known it was him.

"Yes, I know you do. Don't misjudge me, I'm still really annoyed that you
brought us all the way here to sort this out, but I guess you had talked
yourself into a corner. I will be invoicing you for those books, Mr.
Swanning."

"How about I sign them? Would that ease the pain?"

"I shouldn't have to buy my boyfriend's books," I retorted haughtily.

"Boyfriend? Christ, I like the sound of that. Say it again," he asked
huskily, bringing his lips closer to mine.

Knowing I should be angrier with him, but also accepting the situation
for what it was, I kissed him slowly, before muttering it again against his
jaw. He gave a low growl, before devouring my mouth and tasting me
with his hot tongue. As always with Edward, it was at his pace. His teeth
nibbled my throat, as he palmed my breast through my top. I rocked
gently over his hips, enjoying how my body felt when he began to tease
it.

"BB, you wanted to talk..." Edward sighed.

"Hmm, I do, but later. I need...I...You!" I panted. "I need you."

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"But this is Anthony Swanning's room, and you're scheduled for some
one-on-one time with him, not me," he teased, but there was a hesitant
edge to his tone.

Edward was testing me.

"You," I confirmed, licking at his ear lobe. "I want to make love to you;
my boyfriend, even though you were a shit to me and lied."

"I didn't lie, exactly."

"You kept it from me, and made me come here, knowing the trouble it
would cause," I stated, pulling back to look at him.

"Am I in trouble? Because I'd like to know before my balls are in your
hands."

His playful tone made me laugh. He knew he was in trouble, but as
always with Edward, he didn't want to deal with the conflict. I slapped at
his chest and scowled at him.

"You know very well just how annoyed I am at you. There are very few
things you could do to make me forget that."

"Really, Ms. Swan? Now there's a challenge if I ever heard one."

His eyebrow quirked and a smirk teased the corner of his mouth. He
looked completely edible.

"Stand up," he demanded sternly.

"Y-your assistant?" I stammered.

Edward huffed and shook his head. I had no idea what that meant, but it
appeared he wasn't going to say anything further, because he pushed
me carefully off his lap. I stood between his open thighs, chewing on my

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lip. The heated gaze he was sweeping me with warned me of the kind
of sex we were about to have. My knees almost gave way at that
expression alone.

"Strip."

I gulped, but started to undo the buttons on my top. My pussy throbbed
with want. Love was a powerful aphrodisiac, and I wanted to drown in it
with Edward Anthony Masen.

I threw my shirt across the room, and my skirt swiftly followed. I stood
before him in my bra, panties and heels. Empowered by his sharp
intake of breath and the large bulge in his jeans, I cocked a hip and
stared at him through the tops of my lashes, as I licked my lips.

"Teasing me will only incite me further. I want you badly enough as it is,
without you demanding I take you."

"Take me," I said, deliberately repeating his words.

I feral growl rolled through his chest before he pounced. I ended up on
my back on the floor, with Edward attacking my breasts with his mouth.
His tongue teased the lace before delving below the cup. He was
ferocious with his assault on my body, and within minutes my breath
was coming out in short pants. Only he could do that to me.

His lips made a trail along my naked torso and down to my hips.
Edward licked across my hip bone, along the elastic of my thong and
over to the other hip. I rocked them towards him, but he only snarled at
me and continued his perusal. With slow wet kisses, he moved down
the inside of my thigh, across my knee and down to the ankle. My skin
was tingling, as he slipped off my heels.

"I adore these, but they'll have to go. I don't want them digging in my
ass as I have you," he stated bluntly.

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I rubbed my thighs together at the huskiness of his voice. I was already
wet and ready for him. Edward was toxic; my system would go into
overload whenever he was near me.

His hands were on my hips, and he pushed one harshly, wanting me to
turn onto my stomach. I did it without question, before feeling lips work
back up my leg. It didn't escape me that I no longer questioned his
dominance. I'd accepted that; it turned me on, and Edward knew it. I
squirmed under his touch, and wanted him to delve his long fingers into
me, but he incited me further by playing with the edge of my thong while
kissing the inside of my thigh. I tried to hitch my ass, wanting his mouth
somewhere else, but he chuckled against my flesh and moved to kiss
the base of my spine.

I whined.

"Oh, poor BB. Do you need something, honey?" he crooned.

I hissed at him, only making him laugh further. I heard shuffling behind
me, and knew he was removing his jeans, and sheathing himself.
Edward used one finger to skim along my backbone from my neck,
slowly and deliberately all the way down to my underwear. He didn't
stop at the material though, his finger trailed across the lace and dipped
between the cheeks of my ass, following the material. I shivered at the
intrusion, but mewled at the throb it caused.

Edward hummed, clearly feeling how wet I'd become. I waited, wanting
his fingers inside of me, but he carefully hooked the thong with one
finger and lifted it. It pulled the lace taut across my aching clit and made
me whimper. My hips rocked, wanting more. I always wanted more with
him. With each movement the fabric pulled tighter and made my clit
more insistent. It needed to be touched by Edward.

I gasped his name, only to have him lower his head and begin kissing
my ass. I yelped, because nobody had ever done that before, but then
Edward always did things to me that were new. I yelped again when he

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pulled the material and nipped at my cheek. I bucked, but he continued
to lick and nibble the pillowy flesh. It was exquisite.

"Edward, please," I begged.

"No, BB. I say when. I say how," he stated, moving his mouth to the top
of my thong, and hooking his fingers into the lace that rested on my
hips.

He peeled them slowly down, but to my astonishment, licked at the
exposed skin. His tongue followed the crease of my ass, all the way
down to my needy pussy. My underwear was left around my knees, as
Edward lapped at my hot wet clit. I tried to writhe against him, but his
arms were holding my thighs down as he parted my folds. I was
thoroughly exposed to him, and panting with excitement. Arousal was
building low in my belly, but Edward was not going to give me my
completion that easily. He removed his mouth and sat up, tugging my
hips fiercely backwards. I ended up on all fours, feeling his thighs rub
against mine.

"Do you need me?" he asked.

I knew he was asking about more than sex.

"Yes," I moaned, pushing my buttocks towards him, needing him to fill
me. "Yes, I need you. There's only you, Edward."

He groaned loudly, and pushed into me harshly. His hands held my
hips, as he immediately started to thrust with force. Sweat was already
forming across my skin, and my breathing was labored from his scrutiny
of my body. I tossed my head back and begged him to do it harder. My
demand amazed me, let alone Edward. He moved a hand to my
shoulder and held it firmly, at the same time he began squeezing my
ass and nibbling along my spine. It was a delicious torture, and I could
do nothing more than whine and moan for more.

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My nipples ached to be touched, but with each thrust they rubbed
across the lace of my bra easing the need. I gulped when his thumb
pulled my ass cheeks apart, and a nervous energy flooded my body.

"There is nothing sexier than seeing my cock fill you, BB. Nothing. I've
waited so fucking long for this."

His fingers ghosted my back, and popped open the fastening of my bra.
My breasts escaped the confines, waiting for his attention, but it never
came. Instead Edward gripped my hip as he pumped into me harder.
His thumb caressed my skin gently, in stark contrast to his
aggressiveness. That side of him always soothed me. He could be
forceful when we made love, but he would always stroke me softly,
reminding me he was in complete control.

The swirling arousal was building in my abdomen, as Edward held
tighter and thrust harder. I could feel his hot breath on my back, and
hear skin slapping angrily against skin. I whimpered, lowering myself
onto my elbows.

"Fuck," he hissed.

The change in angle made my insides clench. I needed to come. It was
clawing at me, seeking a release.

"Please," I gasped. "Please."

"You want it all, BB? All of me?"

"Yes! Please yes!"

Before I could truly comprehend what was going on, his thumb swirled
across my clit, then around my ass, before pushing slowly and carefully
into it, as he pounded into my wet heat. I inhaled sharply at the
invasion, expecting to be consumed with shock, but it was lust that
flooded my system. He didn't slow his pace, and I'd begun pushing

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back; back against his cock, and back against his thumb. I was
erotically full, and consumed by the intensity. I felt his thighs quiver
against mine, as he began to twitch. His fingers dug into my hips, and
he slowed his pace letting his orgasm swamp him. Only moments later I
came harder than ever before. I screamed, feeling my throat sting at the
force, but it was burning me from the inside and needed an outlet.

I felt Edward slump against my back, as I continued to twitch and moan.
His thumb gently pulled free, but he remained inside me, as he sat
down, moving me with him. I rested on his lap, my back to his chest, as
I tried to calm down. He was kissing my shoulder, making me shiver as
he breathed across my skin.

"I have no words for that," I panted.

"Hmmm, that was definitely indescribable."

He moved his mouth to my ear and licked around the edge, making me
giggle and squirm.

"I shouldn't be laughing. I should still be angry with you."

"Chastise me then," he whispered.

My thighs clenched. Those words leaving his lips had a completely
different meaning. How was it even possible to feel aroused again after
what we'd just done? He was still inside me, and my heartbeat had yet
to even out.

"BB, I love you," he stated firmly against the back of my neck.

I turned in his arms, moaning as he slipped out of my body. I held onto
his shoulders and gazed into his eyes. His pupils were dilated, his
cheeks flushed, and he looked thoroughly happy. I grinned at him.

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"I know you do. It's taken me a while to accept it, but I do Edward. I
really want this to work."

He kissed me, pouring every ounce of love and passion into it. His hand
cupped the back of my head lovingly, as his other stroked my back. I
adored being entwined with him like this, even if it was on the floor.

I began to laugh, making him scowl and pull away.

"What?"

"Can we move to the bed? And can I please sort my underwear out? My
bra is dangling across my chest, and my thong is wrapped around a
thigh," I snorted.

He wiggled his brows at me, and replied saucily, "Need me to take them
off with my teeth, BB?"

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Huh?" he asked lifting me up and dumping me onto the bed. I bounced
on the mattress, and giggled, as I tried to right myself.

"You know what I'm talking about. BB. Tell me."

I leaned back against the headboard and after removing the underwear,
I straddled his lap, gazing into his eyes.

"You really want to know?" he hedged.

"Yes, I'm ready. Tell me!" I demanded.

Edward cupped my face in his palms, and kissed my lips softly.

"Just remember I was twelve when this all started, OK?"

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I frowned. I hadn't thought of that. This didn't bode well. I nodded
apprehensively and waited. He had a cocky little smirk plastered across
his face, and I got the feeling the chastisement he'd mentioned earlier
was going to be needed when I found out.

He stroked the hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear. I knew he
was stalling, but let him have his time.

"I remember that day so clearly. I can recall with perfect clarity the
smells, the sound of the sea, and exactly what you looked like. It's
something I will remember until the day I die. It was the day my whole
world changed, and it was because of you."

Tears began to well. He had waited a long time for me. I just hoped I
could be everything he ever wanted. He sighed and kissed my nose.

"BB means bawling beauty."

I gawked at him. I hadn't really considered what it could mean, but it
would've definitely not been that. He was biting back a grin, waiting for
my reaction, and all I could do was slap at his chest.

"You've been mean to me all this time? And Alice? Does she even know
what it means?" I squeaked.

"No, she doesn't. Only I do," he retorted, and gripped my wrists
between our bodies. "But I was calling you beautiful, don't forget that!"

I pouted at him, pretending to be offended, but I wasn't. It was sweet
that he had this name for me that only we knew about.

"Can I ask you something now?" He asked, becoming serious all of a
sudden.

I nodded cautiously.

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"Did you ever love Tyler, and don't lie to me please."

I closed my eyes, allowing me a moment, as my mind went back to that
place; the one where my husband was on his knees. It was only when I
took the time to think about our situation now that I realized something.
It struck me like a lightning bolt. What I'd felt for Tyler wasn't love. It
didn't even touch what I felt for Edward.

"No," I said softly. "I don't think it was ever really love, but that didn't
stop it hurting the day I found him. I would have been happy with him if
things had been different."

"No, BB, you wouldn't have been. You were meant to be with me. I
know you can feel it, but I'm willing to wait."

He was so nonchalant that I had to smile. I nuzzled his neck, feeling him
begin to stiffen again under me. I needed him, and I wanted him as
fierce as before. I should be shocked by that new aspect to myself, but
it only made me happier. Edward was giving me that new start by
showing me who I really was. Now would be a good time to tell him I
loved him, but I didn't want good. Edward had waited years for me, so
when I told him, I wanted it to be perfect.

For him.

For me.

For us.

I so hope it was worth the wait.

Updates will no longer be on a regualr day of the week. They will
be every 7- 10 days.

Thank you for reading.

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xxx

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20. Chapter 20: Calm

Thanks to everyone reading/reviewing.

Love to my betas - Maylin & Twirlgrrl. You're both amazing.

Thanks to my prereader hunterhunting, and random gropes to my
babes, Elusivekoolaid.

SM owns all things Twilight.

EPOV

Slow gentle kisses brought me out of the blackness of slumber. Tiny
little pecks across my shoulder, all converging on one area.

My tattoo.

I smiled, knowing who was doing it and why.

Yesterday had gone better than I'd expected, but just as I'd hoped. Bella
had understood. She'd shouted and yelled, but eventually she'd actually
listened to my explanation, and even when I'd confirmed her theory on
my tattoo, she'd taken it in her stride. It was clear to me that she'd
already guessed the significance of it, but didn't want to verbalize it
unless I confirmed it to her. However, now she knew it all.

The sandcastles.

The letters.

The tattoo.

Anthony Swanning.

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It was all out in the open, and in the hands of the only person that had
the ability to break me.

I'd handed Bella Swan my heart.

My whole future rested with this woman, and I knew it could never be
the same with anyone else. She was made for me, and from the way
she was seducing me awake, she'd definitely come to realize that too. I
lay still, as if still sleeping. I wanted to enjoy her uninhibited perusal of
my body, but her lips never strayed from my tattoo. Bella obviously liked
it.

Her hands were another matter entirely. They were stroking the planes
of my back; her fingers dipping into the contours of the muscles. I could
feel myself growing hard, but I stayed still. It wasn't often that she woke
before me, nor was she usually this forward. It was fucking beautiful.

As her finger tips met the top of my ass, I heard a tiny sigh of
contentment, before she dipped them below the sheet. An involuntary
shiver ran across the lower part of my body, and I fought to remain
silent. Bella however, was determined to wake me. She lowered her
hand further and began massaging my buttocks, as she lapped at my
shoulder. I bit my lower lip to stop from moaning but didn't know just
how much longer I was going to be able to play dead.

"I know you're awake," she said sweetly.

Busted!

I rolled my eyes, turning my head to face her, but still lying on my
stomach.

"Morning."

Her hand stilled, as she smiled shyly at me. "Good morning, Anthony."

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I grimaced at the name, even though she meant it as a joke. I still had
doubts as to whether she wanted me or him, even though in my heart, I
knew it was irrelevant. She was mine regardless.

"Did you sleep well?"

"You should know that. You were wrapped around me the whole time,
silly."

I moved my hand to stroke her naked thigh, watching her flush a little.

"Did I hurt you last night? Are you sore?"

Bella averted her gaze, clearly a little embarrassed about talking of the
things I'd done to her. That bothered me. I needed her to be honest with
me. There was nothing wrong with what I'd done; in fact, all I was doing
was making her orgasm a much more intense experience. I knew that
had been the case because I'd felt it.

"Um, a little sore, but I'm fine Edward, you didn't hurt me."

"How do you feel about everything else? Now that you've slept on it, I
mean?"

She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and worried it. I was about
to tilt her head so she would acknowledge me, when she met my gaze
and smiled.

"I feel pretty damn good about it, actually. Everything slots into place,
and questions I'd had, have now been answered. It's oddly freeing,
even though it wasn't anything I had control over. Does that make
sense?"

I shuffled onto my side, and cupped her face in my palm.

"Thank you for understanding."

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"Oh, no," she replied, shaking her head. "I don't understand why you
kept it from me, but I decided late last night that it didn't change
anything no matter how annoyed I got with you. I want to be so angry at
you, Edward, but it serves no purpose. I have to accept you had your
reasons for not telling me. I'm still pissed that you left it until we came
here. So much time lost."

"No. Not lost. BB, we have a fucking lifetime, don't you see that? Even
though I knew you were mine, the time had to be right. You had to come
to me, and you did. It's perfect right now," I replied softly, stroking her
cheek.

She laughed. It wasn't the reaction I was expecting and it stung little.

"I'm sorry," she tittered. "But now I know what BB means, it kinda loses
its appeal."

"Appeal? And here I was thinking you hated it."

This was too good to be true. We were actually communicating. We
were being a real couple.

My heart swelled, and my insides were dancing. I hadn't been this
happy since the day I woke up to find her looking at me in appreciation.
I still wanted to go at her pace, but I couldn't stop the emotion that was
building. It was beginning to overwhelm me.

"I don't think I can stop saying it now. It's been so long," I confessed.

She turned her head to kiss my palm, whispering against it, "I don't want
you to. It's a part of us; our history, and even though I didn't really know
about it, it's something I want to retain."

"I love you, BB."

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Bella gazed at me. I could see her eyes shiny with tears of emotion.
Even this morning had gone differently than I'd expected. She seemed
to really accept what was going on between us, and was trying to
embrace it. I couldn't ask for anything more.

I felt her swallow, before she uttered, "Make love to me, Edward."

"Didn't you get enough of me last night?" I snorted.

Bella looked at me seriously, and said, "I think I'm just starting to realize
I can never get enough of you. I'm actually starting to buy into your
prophecy, maybe we are meant to be."

"Maybe?"

"Shut up, Edward and kiss me!" she demanded.

I sat up slowly and leaned back against the headboard. She was
frowning at me, before I patted my lap, making my intentions clear. She
giggled and straddled my hips, holding onto my shoulders, and making
my mouth water with the closeness of her naked breasts.

I quirked a brow, wanting to tease her a little, before I made her scream
my name.

"And where would you prefer I kissed you, Ms. Swan?"

"Hmm, let me see...here," she stated, pointing to her shoulder. I
frowned at her odd choice, but placed my lips over the cool skin and
pecked it quickly.

"Here," she said a little more forcefully, pointing this time to her
collarbone.

My lips remained on her skin longer than before, but only enough to
have her wanting more. I waited for her next choice, as her eyes

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fluttered open. I could see her nipples had begun to bud, and my cock
was starting to make itself known, but I was enjoying the playfulness of
this moment. Last night had been about need and discovery.

Today was about us.

"Here." She motioned to her neck.

I swooped and devoured it thoroughly. My lips moving slowly across the
tender flesh, as my tongue lapped and my teeth nibbled. She tasted
divine; I was completely consumed by her. I wanted to take it slow,
because I'd been rather forceful last night. She deserved slow and
gentle.

I lifted my head, and immediately she pointed to the skin between her
breasts, and smiled. I didn't need to be asked twice, I gave one long
lick, never taking my eyes from hers. I watched them flutter closed, and
could feel her breath coming faster. I adored her reactions to me.

I braced her back with my forearm, and brought her to my mouth,
licking, sucking and just tasting my BB. She was the most amazing
appetizer. I felt her as she held her breath, my lips moving closer to her
nipple. Though that wasn't my goal, I still bestowed a generous amount
of attention on her hard peak. BB squirmed, when I rolled it gently
between my teeth. She was rotating her hips, trying desperately to
impale herself on my cock. There was no way I was doing hard and fast
now. I was going to do as she asked.

I was going to make love to her.

For me, that's what I'd always done with her, even when it was rough,
but she deserved something gentle, and soft. I also wanted to show her,
it didn't matter really how we connected. We just did. We were made for
each other, and were meant to be together.

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Her hands wove into my hair, holding my head to her breasts, as I
teased them and incited her further. Her skin had taken on a salty tang
as she began to perspire. I wanted her whole body screaming for me,
before I entered her.

"Edward," she panted, pushing her pussy towards me.

I licked her nipple and gazed up at her flushed face. I verbalized
nothing, simply shook my head and bit down on the peak.

"Fucking hell," she spat.

"Too much? They must be tender from yesterday, BB."

She made a few incoherent mumblings, but from the way she was
holding my head, and shaking her own, I got the impression she liked
the biting. There were things I'd seen in Bella the first time we'd really
come into sexual contact with each other. She was extremely receptive
to my authority. She certainly didn't just lie there and take it, but I felt
just how wet she became when I held her wrists, or when I gripped her
neck, as I thrust into her. More proof of our connection, and I was
determined that we would not leave this hotel room without some
acceptance from her.

I continued to swirl my tongue around her nipple, blowing on the wet
skin and making her shiver. I could actually see the goose bumps
smattering across her chest. Bella tried to take hold of my cock, but I
couldn't let her. I would blow my load faster than I wanted to. Her
delicate touch always did me in, so to remove the temptation, I lowered
her backwards. My tongue trailed between her breasts, down across
her stomach, and into her navel, where it teased her until she moaned.

I let her lie flat on the mattress, her legs were still either side of my hips,
and to torture her further, I lifted one and began kissing my way up from
the ankle. She giggled and tried to pull away when I reached the inside
of her knee. I made a note of that particular ticklish spot, and continued.

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"Edward!" she complained.

"What? BB, you wanted me to love you, and that's all I'm doing," I
replied innocently.

"Too slow..."

"Never," I retorted, bringing my mouth precariously close to her pussy.

I made sure my mouth caressed her as I spoke, needing to drive her
into a complete frenzy before filling her.

"Do you know how amazing you taste? So sweet and alluring."

I stroked a finger down her slit, watching as it was coated with her
arousal. I made sure she was watching me, before I sucked the finger
into my mouth and tasted her.

Bella's eyes went wide, but were veiled with lust. She was definitely on
her way to losing complete control. My cock was aching.

"Do you need me to beg?" she panted.

"No! Trust me, prolonging it will make it worth it, honey. I promise."

She whined and pushed her hips towards my mouth. The sharp taste hit
me like a sledgehammer, and my control snapped. I pushed a finger
into her wet, needy sex, quickly followed by a second, and began to lick
at her clit. Her thighs came around my head, as the heels of her feet
pushed into my back. She was trying to get enough leverage to be able
to thrust against me, but I knew it was useless.

When I rocked my teeth across the tight bud, she went crazy, thrashing
around on the bed. I had to bite back a smug smile. I fucking loved
making her insane with need, and it was a need only I could sate. I
watched her sweating and writhing with a sense of pride. All of my

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waiting had been worth it for this one moment.

The moment Bella knew me, and wanted me for the person I was, not
what she perceived from a book. She no longer looked away when we
made love, she didn't want to hide from what I had to offer. Bella
understood and wanted me.

Someone other than Aro, actually wanted to be with me, and share my
life.

I gasped and pulled away. I needed to get a grip before I continued, but
emotion was threatening to choke me.

"Edward? Are you OK? Oh, God, did I hurt you?" BB panicked.

She shot up, wrapping her arms around my shoulders, and bringing my
head to rest against her chest. I listened to the sound of her heartbeat,
and tried to understand my anxiety. I'd wanted her virtually my whole
life, and if I was truly honest with myself, there was a part of me that
thought I'd never get her. The arrogant side of me had finally given way,
leaving only the vulnerable little boy that had helped a seven year old fix
her castle. Why now? Why wasn't I overwhelmed last night when I'd
revealed everything?

"Edward, baby, tell me," she whispered.

I clung to her shamelessly, just comforted by her warmth, by her
affection. I have no real idea of just how long we stayed there, in each
others arms, but when the lump in my throat and the void in my chest
began to dissipate I moved slightly and gazed up at her. What I saw
broke my heart. BB was crying, silent tears running down her face. I
shifted quickly and cupped her face in my hands, kissing randomly at
the tears and trying desperately to rid them from her face.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," I uttered, still kissing her cheeks.

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She spluttered her reply. "Why are you sorry? I'm the one that hurt you!
I'm sorry for whatever I did."

I smoothed her hair back from her face, tilting it upwards, before
skimming my hand down her throat and holding her neck.

"You did nothing. I love you, and the only thing you could do to hurt me
is leave. Do you understand that, BB? You would break my fucking
heart if you left."

My voice cracked. I was bearing my fucking soul to her, and hoping she
was not about to do what I feared. I didn't understand why I was feeling
so vulnerable now, but I was, and all I could do was give her the truth.

She closed her eyes for a moment, the unshed tears finally breaking
free.

"BB, why are you crying?"

"I thought I'd hurt you," she stated, opening her eyes. "I don't ever want
to hurt you. You're the most important person in my life now."

I kissed her lips tenderly, as she climbed back onto my lap. She tasted
of salty tears and my gut clenched at the thought of me causing those
tears. I never wanted to see her cry because of me. In fact, I never
wanted to see her cry at all.

Bella trembled when I sucked her lower lip into my mouth, and gripped
my shoulders fiercely. She wrapped her arms around me, pushing my
head into the crook of her neck, and rocking us gently. I felt bare and
raw. I needed her to soothe me; for her to make everything better.

As if reading my mind, she kissed my ear, and whispered against it.

"Let me love you, Edward. Let me show you what you mean to me."

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I opened my mouth to respond, but she moved her hand to my cock and
palmed it. Air rushed from my mouth, as she stroked me confidently. I
simply gazed at her in wonder. When had I become such a girl about
my feelings for this woman? I would do anything to see a smile on her
face.

Anything.

I growled low in my throat, and held her hips, before lifting her slightly
and lowering her onto me. We groaned in unison. It was truly divine,
and it was only when I pumped a few more times, that I realized I had
no condom on. I knew she was on the pill, because I'd seen them in our
bathroom, but I wasn't sure how she'd feel about the lack of latex.

When she moved one of my hands to grip her ass, I stopped thinking
about it, because she sure as hell wasn't. BB was too busy riding me. At
first it was slow and careful, clearly meant to comfort, but pretty soon,
as it always did with us, it became heated and harsh. My fingers dug
into her buttocks, as my teeth bit at her shoulder. She was leaving her
own marks by clawing at my back, as she bounced on my lap.

Everything righted itself when she looked at me and grinned. Her
cheeks were pink from the exertion, her hair completely dishevelled,
and she was panting, but she had truly never looked more beautiful.

I kissed her to stop from saying how much she meant to me again, and
at the same time I began to stroke her clit. I swallowed her moans and
cries, wanting to hold onto them forever, but knowing it was impossible.
My balls were growing tight, and I could feel arousal pooling low in my
belly. The sight of her tits bouncing in front of my face was going to tip
me over the edge. I couldn't focus enough to delay it.

"Bella, I'm...fuck...I'm about to...you need to get off," I panted.

She scowled at me, and then giggled. Totally ignoring my comment, she
reached down and began to touch herself, at the same time swirling her

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hips.

I exploded into her amazing body, as the white light lanced through me.
My whole body twitched with the force of it, and only moments later I
heard BB cry my name. I was still shuddering from its force when she
rested her forehead against mine and stared into my eyes.

"Beautiful," she said breathlessly. "We are beautiful."

I grinned at her, knowing she was right.

"Perfect," I agreed.

/ T \\

Eventually our bubble had to burst, and we had to get packed and head
home.

Home.

Just thinking it made me smile and my chest swell. We were going back
very different from when we'd arrived, and I couldn't wait to see Alice.

"Um...I have a present for you," I crooned, wrapping my arms around
her waist from behind.

She was zipping up her overnight bag and buttoning her flat iron into the
side pocket.

"Oo, a gift? I like the sound of that. Gimme, gimme!"

I snorted and moved to retrieve a box. She virtually snatched it from my
hands in her excitement. It only made me smile more. I braced myself
as she opened the lid.

"Books? Your fucking books? What?"

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I pouted playfully at her. "Ungrateful much? I told you I'd sign some for
you. There you go."

"You've gotta be kidding me?" she moaned petulantly.

Christ, she was sexy when she was angry.

"Lift up the books," I groaned, rolling my eyes.

Her anger dissipated almost immediately as she removed the books
from the box, tossing them onto the bed. There was a quick intake of
breath, before she reached inside and lifted two envelopes from inside.

"Edward?"

"When you first arrived I told you Aro had left some letters for you, but
you had to be ready before I gave them to you. You read the first one,
but these are the others. Again, I have no idea what he wrote in them;
they're not mine to read. I think now you know the truth, it is the right
time for anything the old man had to say."

I watched her eyes begin to sparkle.

"Please don't cry. I can't cope with that. Not after this morning. Please,
BB," I begged, hugging her body close.

"I'm OK. I just feel a little bad because I forgot there were more."

"You where a little sidetracked, if I remember correctly," I whispered
huskily into her ear.

"Hmm, yes, you and your naked ass."

I kissed her slowly, it was a simple, gentle caress; a kiss to convey my
emotion.

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"We need to check out, honey. Are you ready?"

She nodded, chewing on her lip while she placed the books into the
box. The letters went inside too, and I questioned why she wasn't
leaving them out to read them.

"I want to do that at home. Do you mind?"

"No, BB. They're your letters; you read them when you're ready."

I picked up our bags and we walked down to check out, and rode the
elevator to the parking lot. It was only when we were on the highway
that Bella broke the silence.

"You know what we're heading towards, don't you?"

I squeezed her fingers tightly where they rested on my thigh and
nodded.

"Your mom."

"Even if by some miracle she isn't there kicking Alice out already, then
she'll be there in the next couple of days. It's going to be painful."

"There will be bloodshed..."

She winced, muttering about it not being too far from the truth. I wished
I could make all that shit go away. I was her family now. I was all she
needed, along with Newton because I couldn't leave the mutt out. He
adored Bella.

"She hates you and Alice. I don't know how to deal with that."

"We'll both be there for you, but if that causes even more of a problem,
then maybe you could get Rosalie to sit with you when you talk to her? I
can't see Renee going off at you in front of a pregnant woman, right?" I

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hedged.

"You don't know my mother very well. She loves an audience." She
sighed audibly and rested her head on my shoulder, leaning across the
console. "What am I going to do, Edward?"

"Truth?" I questioned bluntly.

"Always."

"If you want the house, if you want the land, fuck it, if you want me,
you'll stand up to her!"

"Why does she hate you? And why does she hate Alice, she's her
sister."

I switched lanes, making Bella move her head a little. I wished I could
have looked at her while we were having this conversation, but I needed
to concentrate on the road. I needed to get us home, and get this
cleared up. Our life could never really start until this had been resolved.

"I don't know why she hates me, BB. I've told you this. You need to ask
Renee. As for Alice, you know the answer to that, and you don't need
me to state the obvious. Can I make a suggestion, though?" I asked
cautiously, not really sure how she'd take it.

Bella nodded, and pulled away to look at my face. I glanced at her
quickly before looking back to the road. As reassurance, I brought her
hand to my mouth and kissed her fingers, one by one.

"Maybe your Mom isn't willing to bend on this, and maybe you're going
to have to do more than stand your ground."

"Hmm..."

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"What I guess I'm trying to say is that when the time comes, you may
need to be stronger than you ever thought possible," I stated sadly.

"Like be on my own?"

She sounded completely forlorn, but she needed to be prepared; for this
issue to at least have been raised. That way it wouldn't be too much of
a shock.

I shrugged.

"It's not so bad, BB, and I assure you, you'll never be alone again.
Ever," I said vehemently.

The car was silent for the next three miles, and I left her to think
everything over. I called Alice, and spoke to her on the handsfree.
Renee hadn't made an appearance yet, and Newton was fine. The
house was still standing. That comment had raised a chuckle from
Bella, so I knew she was OK.

It wasn't until we were about thirty minutes from La Push that she finally
spoke.

"You're saying I may have to kick her out of the house, and maybe even
my life?"

"Yes, BB, I'm saying that's a possibility."

She snuggled into her seat, pulling her arms around her body for
comfort.

"I don't think I'm strong enough to do that, Edward."

I let that hang, because I knew she was. Bella had to believe in herself.
I just hoped she could do it when the time came, because I had no
doubt she would need to.

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Renee was going to cause one hell of a commotion.

Is everyone else dreading the Renee chapter as much as me?

Thanks for reading!

xxx

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21. Chapter 21: Ties

Love to my beta - Maylin and my pre reader hunterhunting.

Gropes to my rock, elusivekoolaid. She's always there when I need
her!

psst...we're nearing the end...

SM owns all things Twilight.

BPOV

We'd been back from Seattle for two days, and it was all still sinking in. I
would stare at Edward when I knew he wasn't paying attention, just
trying to digest that he was the man I'd been writing to. He was the one
I'd had a crush on. My future now had a face, and it was Edward's. The
realization had only truly hit me in the car on the way home from
Seattle. At the same time I remembered my mother's arrival still hung
over our heads.

Edward was rather abrupt in his assessment of the situation, and it
scared me to even think that I would have to tell her to leave and never
come back. She had to accept my new family, there was no other way.
It had consumed me since we'd returned, and Edward had warned Alice
to give me some space.

That was why I was here, back on the beach, and gazing out at the
waves. I wanted to be alone with my thoughts, and I'd brought the final
letters from Granddad. I'd saved them, not really sure I wanted it to all
be so final. It would be the moment I read that last one. Any connection
would be severed, and all that would remain would be the house, and
the ink on the paper. It was silly because there wasn't much more than
that now, but I still felt that it would make it all disappear once I read that
last one.

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I shuffled them in my hands, admiring his swirly script and wondering
whether I should save them. Did I really want to upset myself again? His
last letter had left me sobbing for hours afterward. Edward had consoled
me, and even though he didn't know what had been in the letter, he'd
made sure I was OK and had never asked what it contained. I
wondered if Aro had given Edward his own notes, but that wasn't for me
to snoop into.

"Are you OK, Bella?"

I whipped my head around to the owner of the voice. Alice stood at the
entrance to the beach in very short shorts, and a bright orange top. The
wedges on her feet were the exact same shade of as her top, and I was
glad I had sunglasses on. The color was so bright it would make my
eyes water otherwise.

"So much for space," I mumbled.

"I'm sorry. Edward did ask me to, but I'm worried. I never knew you and
now I do, I want to be a part of your life. I want to be able to help you,
Bella."

She took her shoes off and dangled them from her index finger, as she
walked over to me.

"I just want to be alone, Alice. I have too many things swimming around
in my head and need to get a grip on just one. It's a little overwhelming
to suddenly find out my past could actually be my future."

Alice smiled and sat down on the sand next to me.

"They both love you, you know."

"Who?"

She rolled her eyes at my stupidity.

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"Dad. Edward. They both adore you. Dad spoke about you until the day
he died. He refused to let Renee's hate poison his feelings for you. He
always hoped you'd see through the silly reasons she disowned him,
and make your own decision ."

I watched the tide wash onto the dry sand; analyzing the way it seeped
into the tiny grains.

"Are you going to be OK when she arrives, Alice? It's not going to be
pretty, and you know it."

Alice grimaced, and moved her hand to rub my shoulder in comfort.

"I've told Edward that I'll leave for a while if it makes it easier on you.
Renee is going to have enough of a problem once you tell her about
you and him, let alone the fact that I'm humping the gardener in my bus.
I can come back in a week or so? The choice is yours, BB."

I giggled, making her frown.

"What's so funny?"

"Did Edward ever tell you what BB meant?" I questioned softly.

"Yes, beautiful Bella. Why?"

I shook my head.

"He lied. It means nothing of the sort. He told me in Seattle what it really
meant. Now that I know, I can't stop laughing when I hear it."

"So, spill..."

I wondered for a moment if it would upset him for me to tell her. They
were very close and the fact that he'd lied to her told me he wanted this
between us, but I was tired of secrets. Even one as small as this.

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"Bawling beauty," I snorted.

Her blue eyes went wide, seconds before she howled with laughter.

"The lying little shit! I'll have to have a little chat with that brother of
mine!"

"He's not your brother, Alice," I stated.

She shook her head almost immediately. "We don't have to be tied by
blood for him to be my brother. I love him, and will always see him as
my family. BB, he's all I have left."

We remained silent for a while. Only the sounds of the water, and the
wind filling the void. I hugged my knees closer to my chest, and stared
at Alice. She was waiting for something from me, but it wasn't until the
words slipped from my lips that I realized I wanted to voice them.

"You and Edward may be all I have left after my mother has visited.
Edward has said I should prepare myself. That maybe my Mom isn't
willing to compromise on this, and that if I want to stay here with you
two, then I could have to accept my relationship with her is over. I don't
know if I can do that. My Mom is abrupt, sometimes mean, but she's my
mother and I won't be getting another one." I paused for breath, before
staring directly at Alice's pained expression. "Could you do that? Could
you imagine never talking to your Mom again?"

"Oh, BB," she responded, wrapping me in her tiny arms. "Dad would be
so angry that it's come to this."

"Does it have to, Alice? Is Edward right, am I really going to have to
chose between here or my mother?" I sobbed, not noticing the tears
that had begun to fall.

"I hope not, but every exchange I've had with my sister has been horrid,
so I'm not the best person to ask."

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She pulled me closer, allowing me to rest my head on her small
shoulder, as she stroked my hair.

"How can I be expected to make that choice?"

"You can't hun, and you shouldn't have to. Maybe it will go differently
than you think. Maybe she'll surprise us all."

Alice's tone told me she didn't believe it anymore than I did. Edward
was right; I was going to have to make a choice. My mother was not
going to make this easy.

"Can I show you something? It's something I know Edward won't have
taken you to."

I pulled away and wiped the tears from my face. Alice was stroking my
arm, still trying to console me. At the same time Newton came bounding
over and began licking my wet cheeks. I giggled and batted him away.

"Come on, it's over in the woods." Alice smiled, tugging me to my feet.
"Slippers? You walked to the beach in your slippers?"

"Yeah," I shrugged. "I wasn't really thinking straight. I just started
walking."

We began strolling towards the woods, and to my surprise she entwined
her fingers in mine. It felt good to have her looking after me.

"Did you want to read those?" she asked, nodding towards Aro's letters.

"Truth? No, I don't think I did. Is it silly that I don't want to read them? I
don't want it to be so final."

"There's nothing silly about that! I understand. Sometimes I pick up the
phone to call him, and it's only when I go to dial that I remember. Dad
was a huge part of this place, and I like to think he'll never really leave."

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"That's nice, Alice. I hope that's true."

I gazed over at the house, as we entered the woods. I wondered what
Edward was doing, and as if on cue, he came out of the door, dressed
in running shorts and tennis shoes. I stopped, and studied him as he
whistled to Newton from the porch. He waved at Emmett, who was
working on the barn.

Could Edward be the only family I'd ever need? Was he strong enough
to fill that void if everything went badly?

"Alice?"

"Hmm?" she voiced absently while looking at the trees.

"Does Edward see his family much?"

She turned to me, her lips pursed, and fidgeted with the strap of her top.
She looked uncomfortable, and it only intrigued me further as to why.

"Granddad wrote in his letter that Edward needed me; that he wasn't as
strong and as sure as he seemed. Why? Does that have something to
do with his family and him being left here?"

"Have you asked Edward? I don't really think you should be asking me,
hun."

"You know he wouldn't tell me. He thinks I'm the only one who has
issues to deal with, but I can see that's wrong. Please Alice," I begged.
"I know some things, but he was vague and clearly that was on
purpose. I need to know."

Alice groaned and lowered herself onto a tree stump, smoothing down
her flyaway hair.

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"I hate talking about him when he's not here, but you're right. I don't
think he'll tell you everything himself." she paused, as if deciding again
whether she was really going to do this. "Edward feels abandoned.
When his parents decided to leave him here, he grew very withdrawn
for the longest time. The only thing that made him happy was talking
about you, or the possibility of you returning."

"But Edward told me that he demanded he live here. He said that the
guy his Mom married was nice. I don't get it, Alice."

"I don't really think any of us will. Edward won't really delve into that
side of his life. From what I've deduced, it was always him and his Mom,
but when Carlisle came along, as nice as he was, Edward never
adjusted to her having someone else in her life. I'm sure it hasn't
escaped your notice that he likes to be the center of your world. Well, I
guess it was the same for his Mom. I think he took refuge here, and Dad
encouraged it because he was lonely, and as odd as it is, he was a
replacement for me. Does that make any sense at all?"

My chest hurt for him. It made perfect sense. Edward felt left out, and as
a child that must have been hard to adjust to. It didn't really explain his
behavoir now, but I could discuss that with him.

"Did they try to make him go with them? I mean, he has a sister now,
doesn't he?"

"Yes," she grinned. "Charlie. She visited a couple of times. She's a cute
kid, but I don't think Edward really sees her as a sister. It's only because
they don't really know each other though. From what Dad said, they
tried, but he ran away and came back here. All he wanted was for them
to demand he stay with them, to prove they wanted him, but they never
did. To Edward, they gave up. Aro was his only constant, because even
I left him."

I looked back towards the house. I needed to comfort him; to promise
him that I wouldn't leave, but he was gone. All I could see was Emmett

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loading some debris into his truck. Even Newton had deserted the
place.

"How can I make it better for him?" I whispered, though I knew what the
answer was.

"You can love him, BB. It's all he's ever wanted."

"I do love him...oh!" I gasped, covering my mouth with my hand and
glaring at Alice.

She was grinning widely and pointing her finger in my direction.

"You've only just realized that, haven't you?"

I slumped to the floor, not caring just how dirty my skirt would get and
looked back at her.

"I don't know. I mean, I knew he was different and that there was
something between us, but I was scared to give it a name. I've done
that before and ended up in a divorce court not too long after. Wow."

"So you haven't told Edward?" she squeaked.

"I hadn't even told myself apparently."

"You don't sound happy, BB. Please tell me you're not going to break
his heart. Please. He would hide forever if that happened."

Her voice was desperate, pleading. She didn't want her brother to
break, and they'd both told me I had that power, hell, I even knew I had
that power. However, that couldn't have been further from my mind. I
wanted to hug him, to comfort him, and to make love to him until he
understood I wouldn't leave like others had. This was our house, our
family, our life.

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I laughed loudly, making Alice jump and eye me cautiously. She must
have been wondering if my declaration had sent me a little mental.

"I'm laughing at this situation. The day I arrived Edward told me it was
our house, and our bedroom, even our goddamned dog, and now I'm
finally seeing that. He knew, Alice. It wasn't some silly idea, or whim, he
really knew that we were meant to be together. He waited all those
years and had complete faith that one day I would return and want him.
Christ, such faith. How could he keep so positive?"

Alice was clapping and laughing along with me now.

"Go! Go and tell him, BB. Make his lifetime!"

I shook my head, my smile fading fast.

"I can't just blurt this out. He's waited a longtime for this. I want him to
remember this for the rest of his life..."

"He'll do that anyway," she interrupted.

"No," I replied bluntly. "I want this to be special. He deserves it. And I
need to do it after my mother has gone. A step at a time. I need her
removed from the equation, and then I can start my new life with my
family. Here."

"Then now is the perfect time to show you this."

Alice dragged me up and pulled me towards a large tree nestled
between many others. It was nothing out of the ordinary, and it was no
wonder she had struggled to find it. I raised my brows at her in question.
All she did was point at the bark, and grin.

"What?"

"There! Look!" she demanded.

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I rolled my eyes, still trying to get to grips with the feelings that were
currently racing through my body. I felt light headed, but at the same
time like a coiled spring. It was a strange contradiction.

I groaned and focused on the tree, sighing with affection when I read
the words that were carved into the bark.

EM + BB

My Heart 4ever

My throat closed with emotion, and I looked at Alice through watery
eyes.

"When...When did he do this?" I choked out.

She gave a little smile, as I touched the wood, running my fingers
across the grooves.

"He was fifteen. There had been a small party on the beach, and a
couple of his friends had abandoned him so they could neck with two
girls from out of town. I watched him come into the woods. I was sitting
on the porch reading. He was here for a while before going into the
barn. I came to see what he'd been doing and found this. Even then he
was certain, BB. I thought you'd like to see just how rigid his resolve
was."

"Newton! Here boy!" Edward shouted from somewhere in the woods.

We both jumped, startled by his yelling.

"I'm going to leave you two to talk. You don't have much time before
your mother arrives. Tell him. Make my brother happy."

She kissed my cheek and skipped off towards the house. I continued to
stare at the tree, and seconds later Newton came bounding towards

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me. His tongue lolled to one side, as he panted and flopped at my feet.
Edward wasn't too far behind, his chest slick with sweat from his run.
He strolled over, a huge smile lighting up his face. My eyes traced his
torso as a trickle of sweat started at the base of his throat, slowly
moving between his pecs and running across his abdomenal muscles.
My tongue swirled around my mouth. I wanted to lick that bead of
sweat; to follow the path it had taken with my tongue.

He cleared his throat, making me meet his eyes. He cocked a brow at
me, and when he opened his mouth I knew he was about to utter an
innuendo.

"Need a better view, BB?" he stepped closer, swamping me with his
warmth.

"I-I can see you just fine where you are," I stuttered.

"Fine? Is that all you want? Fine?"

I gulped. How could he still have this kind of effect on me? I'd been with
him many times, and in many ways now, but he still had the ability to
reduce me to goo. My eyes darted from him, towards the tree and back
again. His green ones followed me, and I heard a small rumble roll
through his chest when he noticed what I'd been looking at.

"So...you found my love note?"

"Alice brought me to it," I said softly, chewing on my lower lip nervously.

"Fucking little busybody. She can't just leave it, can she?"

I placed a hand on his chest, hoping to calm him, but realized he wasn't
really annoyed. He was just stating the obvious. He covered my hand
with his and brought it to his lips, before he began pecking at my
fingertips. It was the smallest, softest little kisses, but I felt the instant
stirrings of lust in my belly.

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"I think its cute," I smiled.

He grimaced a little. "Cute? BB, you never call a man cute."

"You weren't a man when you carved this."

He tugged me against his wet chest, bringing his head to my shoulder
and running his nose tenderly up my neck. I shivered, as my fingers dug
into his waist.

"She told you the story too? Damn, I'll get her. Maybe tell Jasper
something terribly embarrassing."

His lips tickled my skin, and I tried to pull myself from his embrace.

"On no, BB. I have you here. In the woods. I'm half naked. Seems too
good an opportunity to miss. We haven't been this close since Seattle,"
he crooned before latching onto my neck and sucking gently.

"You make it sound like that was months ago! Days, Edward, that's all.
I'm sure you can cope."

I felt him shake his head, as he pulled my t-shirt up and tunneled his
hand underneath.

"No. No, I can't. Is there a reason you're shutting me out?"

"Edward!" I whined. "I'm not shutting you out. I've got so much to work
through. I thought you understood that."

"I do, but I don't have to like it." His thumb caressed the underside of my
breast, making my breath hitch. "Last night I tried to cuddle you, but you
pulled away."

"I assume I was asleep," I gasped as he flicked at my nipple.

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He sucked my earlobe into his mouth, nibbling with his teeth. I was
swiftly losing my train of thought.

"I think you could have been, but I still got pissed off at it. Why would
you move away from me?"

"I was sleeping, and this conversation is getting us nowhere."

"Oh, I beg to differ," he muttered against my jaw at the same time he
cupped my breast. "I think I'm definitely getting somewhere."

I gave a small giggle, but it swiftly turned into a moan. His fingers were
doing the most divine things to my breast. He backed me carefully up
against our tree, and placed his palm against the carved wood, as he
continued to tease my flesh. His eyes were dark, intense and
completely focused on mine.

"I didn't know I was turning away from you, Edward. I wouldn't do that
intentionally."

I lifted my hand to his cheek and stroked it with my thumb. "I'd never
turn away from you."

"Hmm, that's not what you said the day you arrived," he snorted.

"I didn't know you then."

We remained wrapped up in each other; ours eyes locked, as his
fingers rolled my nipple. My world thinned until only we remained.

"How do you do that?" I whispered.

He lowered his head to nuzzle my neck, allowing my hand to drop to his
waist.

"Hmm, what?"

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"You have this ability, a way of making the world disappear, and all I
can focus on is us."

Edward smiled and kissed the tip of my nose.

"Don't question it BB. That's just us, and I adore it. You're the center of
my world, so it only stands to reason that everything else would
diminish when I'm with you."

My fingers tightened around his waist at his words, making the corner of
his mouth twitch. He knew what his words did to me. Even from that first
day he'd had the ability to make me melt.

"Are you OK, BB? I told everyone to leave you alone for a while. I know
the appearance of the wicked witch is looming over all ours heads, but
it's much worse for you."

"Don't call her that," I stated weakly.

"Answer me." Edward demanded, squeezing my nipple lightly.

"Hey!" I squirmed.

My hips came into sharp contact with his thighs; the evidence of his
arousal pushing at my stomach. An involuntary moan slipped from my
lips.

"Do I need to persuade you?" he crooned. "Ms Swan, I have numerous
ways to get you to talk. Like this..." His lips connected with my neck and
he began to slowly kiss a path down towards my shoulder.

"Or this..." They continued their trail along my collarbone, but stopped at
the swell of my breasts.

"Or maybe this..."

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Edward pinched my nipple and bit down softly on my breast, making my
knees buckle and my heart pound. I gasped as he licked across the
skin, pushing me harder against the tree. My hand moved of its own
accord and tickled the drawstring of his running shorts. Edward instantly
stopped and pulled away, wagging his finger.

"Nuh uh. This is my interrogation."

I pouted.

"Don't you want me to touch you, Edward?"

I licked my lower lip, trying to get him to give in and put his lips back
where they had been. I missed them already.

"Oh, hell yes, I want you to touch me, and not just with your hands. I
happen to really like what you do with that sassy little mouth of yours,
but right now, all I want is an answer to my question. It's important to
me."

I sighed, and rested my head against his chest, mumbling my answer
into his slick skin. I knew he wouldn't accept that though, and cupped
my chin forcefully between his thumb and forefinger. I stared at him, in
silent protest, but moments later gave in.

"I'm scared. I'm tired, and I really want this all done with. I'm sick of the
threat of my mother hanging over our heads."

"Only you perceive her as a threat, honey. I couldn't give a shit what
she has to say. I'm here to support you, but I warn you now, if she
oversteps the mark, I will go after her. No one upsets you."

I swallowed at the absolute conviction in his eyes. I didn't doubt him. He
really would do anything to protect me, and my heart swelled. The
words were on the tip of my tongue, but I bit them down. Now wasn't the
time.

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Edward's hand slid down the underside of my jaw, before he held my
throat firmly. Heat flamed between my thighs, making me squeeze them
tightly. My skin burned with need, as I watched a knowing smile creep
across his face.

"Christ, you really were made for me. Most people would be at least a
little frightened of the way I'm holding you now, but that's not what
you're feeling is it, BB? You want me. Fuck, just knowing that makes me
hard."

He rocked his hips against me, making my eyes flutter closed and my
head flop backwards.

"BB, we need to get home. Now. I have to take you before our little
haven is darkened by our visitor."

"Yes," I gasped desperate for him.

His lips met mine in a harsh, aggressive kiss. His fingers flexed around
my neck, and I groaned in response. His tongue penetrated my mouth,
sliding seductively against mine. My stomach tightened and my knees
trembled.

I was gasping for air when his hold loosened. He sucked on my lower lip
gently, and then released me completely. His fingers interlaced with
mine and he tugged me towards the house. We giggled as I bent to
retrieve the letters I'd dropped. Edward never let go of my hand.

As we strolled across the garden, he kissed at my shoulder, or my arm;
tugging and tickling as we approached the house.

"Fancy a shower, BB?"

"Sitting on the beach has made me somewhat dirty," I replied absently.

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"Oh, well, I'll leave you then. You know how much I like it when you're
dirty."

I snorted loudly, pushing at his chest...and that's when I noticed it.

My mother's car was driving up the path.

I wasn't ready. A whimper escaped my lips, as Edward stated,
"Showtime."

I don't need to tell you what the next chapter includes!

As always, links to all outfits are on my profile.

Thanks for reading

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22. Chapter 22: Broken

Thanks to my pre reader elusivekoolaid & my beta Maylin.

You guys are the best.

FYI: This story will not update on Twilighted before it updates
here.

SM Owns all things Twilight. I won a mother just like this.

BPOV

I wasn't ready.

I wasn't prepared.

Even though I'd known this day, this moment, was inevitable, I still
wasn't ready for it to be here. Edward's hand tightened around mine,
and I took a deep breath as we walked across the garden to meet her.

My mother.

She was climbing out of her car, as Edward whispered into my ear.

"BB, you can do it. I'm here for you. I love you, just be strong."

I gulped and nodded, hoping it wasn't going to kick off immediately. He
remained at my side, holding my hand as we walked over to her car. My
mother stood pouting, crossing her arms across her chest. Waiting.

"Hi, Mom,"I said softly, pulling away from Edward to try and hug her.

She winced and didn't allow the contact.

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"Well, at least that answers my question as to what he's doing here,"
she spat.

"Pardon?"

She gestured between Edward and I, a sneer marring her lips.

"Hand holding, the state of your clothing, and the fact that he isn't
wearing any at all. It speaks volumes, Isabella."

I looked down at my clothes. The only item out of place was my top; it
was gathered a little at my hip where Edward had placed his hand
underneath. She couldn't have known from just that alone. She was
guessing.

"I'm still unsure what you're asking,and to be honest, this isn't really the
greeting I was hoping for."

"Did you think I was going to come here and be nice? Really?"

"Oh, no, we wouldn't expect that," Edward muttered.

I chose to ignore him, and stared back at my mother. She was definitely
going without the pleasantries. She hadn't even acknowledged Edward,
so it didn't bode well for Alice. She either didn't hear Edward's
comment, or ignored it. She didn't even look his way, just continued to
glare at me.

"I...I don't..." I spluttered.

"Spit it out! I didn't come here for you to spend the next few days
incoherent. We need to sort out this mess that you've created."

"Mess? Few Days?"

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I felt nauseous. She couldn't stay here. I knew I wouldn't be able to
cope with her in this place. This was my haven and her presence would
darken it. She already was.

"Yes, Isabella, mess! If you would have listened to me you wouldn't be
stuck here now with these two reprobates."

Edward laughed loudly and placed his arm around my waist, pulling me
close to his bare chest. He was trying to soothe me, but I knew he was
also just trying to annoy Renee further.

"I have no idea what you find so amusing," she snarled at Edward. "The
one thing this situation is not, is funny. You have no claim over this
property, so I suggest you pack up what few possessions you have and
go."

A low growl rolled in Edwards chest, and I placed a hand across the
flesh, looking into his eyes and begging him to stay silent. He raised his
brows at me. I understood he was allowing me a little space, but could
feel how annoyed he was. My mother wouldn't need to stay a few days;
this was going to be all over today. I could feel it. She was never going
to see reason. Anxiety roiled in my guts, and I got the sickening feeling
that Edward was right.

Today could mean the end of my relationship with my mother.

I swallowed the dread and turned back to face her. My voice shook a
little as I spoke.

"Edward isn't going anywhere. I want him to stay,and Alice too."

She visibly cringed as I mentioned her sister, but composed herself very
quickly.

"You're not mentally stable at the moment to make that decision. I now
realize that what happened with Tyler took its toll on you, and you need

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to take some time, Isabella. You need to come home."

"I am home," I whispered, hearing Edward's sharp intake of breath at
my declaration.

"Don't talk stupid! This place isn't a home. I told you that you needed to
sell it; to get rid of all those disgusting memories."

Edward's hand tightened on my hip, as he tried to keep out of it for me.

"I don't have any bad memories of this place, Mom. Look, can we go
inside?"

She rolled her eyes and turned her back on us, saying nothing further
as she stalked towards the house.

"BB..." Edward started softly, but I placed a finger across his lips,
stopping his words.

"Just give her a chance. I know it's not looking good, but please, for
me."

He nodded, but I could see he wasn't happy with my choice. I tried to
remain calm as we approached the steps to the porch.

Renee had already climbed them, and was about the open the screen
door, when Alice opened it moments before. The air stilled around us,
as the two women stared at each other. Some small part of me hoped
they were about to embrace; that Mom could accept she had been very
harsh in her assessment of her sister. But as always with my mother, I
was disappointed.

"GET. OUT." she said, her words cold.

Alice's blue eyes went wide, as they shot towards me.

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"Mom..."

"Stay out of this," she warned. "I do not want her brand of poison
affecting my daughter's life."

"Alice has been a really good..."

"OUT! GET OUT!"

I reached out, trying to grasp my Mom's arm, but she pulled it harshly
and began screaming at the top of her lungs. She frightened me, as I
watched her lose her grip on her composure.

"OUT, OUT, OUT! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

As Mom shook with rage, Alice side stepped her and hugged me.

"I'll be in the bus. I really don't want to make this any worse than it
already is. I'm so sorry, BB, I wanted this to be so very different for you."

I could have cried at the warmth in her embrace, the affection in her
words. The love I felt coming from my aunt was something I should
have been given from my Mom. I'd always known she was very closed
off to her feelings, but I was realizing just how cold she was. My anxiety
was building, and I felt as though I was going to vomit.

Alice stroked Edward's arm and rushed off to her van. It was the safest
place for her.

Renee stormed into the house, tutting and muttering to herself as she
assessed the changes that we'd made. Edward was glaring at me, and I
could see the tick of aggression flicking on his cheek. He wouldn't stay
silent long, and it bothered me just how angry he was going to be when
he let rip. I pleaded with him with my eyes to give me some time. He
cleared his throat, as Mom turned around.

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"Drink, Renee?" he asked.

She didn't even glance in his direction.

"So, Isabella, how long are you planning to stay here and make poor
Tyler feel guilty?"

"Mom!" I gasped. "Edward asked you a question. Please don't ignore
him."

"Are you intending to answer my question?"

Edward kissed my nose, as I gawked at her ignorance. How could
someone be this hostile and why?

He walked to the kitchen, and I could tell it was so he could calm down,
not to give me time with my mother. I was at a loss for words. She
wasn't going to listen, and the more apparent that became the more my
blood began to boil. My fists clenched as she stared defiantly at me.

"You know what, Mom? Go ahead, spit it out. Rant and rave, get
everything off your chest, but know this: it will change nothing. This is
my home, and Edward and Alice are my guests; free to stay as long as
they wish."

"Oh, so you're going to take up where Dad left off, are you? You're
going to house the waifs of La Push? Somehow, I just don't see you in
that role," she said sarcastically.

"How are they waifs?" I asked, throwing my hands up in exasperation.
"Alice is your sister!..."

"No. No, she isn't."

I ignored her interruption and continued. "And Edward? He's basically
your brother! Aro treated them exactly the same. He treated you all the

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same, Mom."

"And isn't that just the point!" she snarled, spitting as she spoke. "I was
the daughter. He had no right taking care of other kids, and no right
caring for them more than he cared for me. Then to top it all, he leaves
this house to you. YOU! A child he hadn't seen in years!"

"Mom," I pleaded. "I don't understand. He never loved them more than
you. You were the one that walked away when you learned of Alice. He
tried, but you refused to speak to him. What choice did granddad have?
He couldn't turn his back on his other daughter, and Edward needed his
help. He missed you, and probably replaced you with Edward. Why are
you being like this?"

Her eyes were bulging, her shoulder set like stone. I'd seen my mom
angry before, but this was something entirely different. This scared me.

"I'm like this, because I will not see this house be turned into some
squat for anyone needing somewhere to stay. This place should be
mine, I told you that. You'll waste the opportunity because your head is
so full of the stupid things you think you saw. Tyler loves you! Isabella,
I'm so very disappointed in you. Your Dad would be too."

I shook.

My whole body seemed to be in turmoil. Her words were cutting to my
very core, leaving deep, bloody lacerations on the way. My chest hurt,
and my breathing was coming out in pants. I couldn't get my head to
comprehend what she was saying. None of it made sense to me. She
sounded no better than a petulant child who's best friend had a toy she
wanted. I realized in that moment that there would be no reasoning with
her.

This was it.

This was the end.

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This was the start.

I opened my mouth, but only whimper escaped.

I couldn't bring myself to tell her to leave. The words would leave my
mouth. It hurt too much to have to say it to her. She was my mother and
it should never have come to this. There had to be a way around this.

"What? Isabella, standing there and gawping at me is getting us
nowhere. Now, I think the best thing is to pack some of your things and
come back to the hotel with me. It will give the squatters time to clear
their trash from here before we lock it up on sell it. It's no use to anyone.
I honestly can't believe you're living here! It's a disgrace."

"Mom..." I breathed, my chest aching.

"Come on!" she demanded angrily. "This place is draining me. Get your
things, we're leaving. Tyler said he's willing to talk to you when you
return. I think that's very considerate of him, given what you did."

I blinked furiously. "What I did? I don't..."

"I can't fucking listen to this anymore! Who do you think you're talking
to? That's you daughter, not the dog, in fact I wouldn't even talk to my
dog with such disdain." Edward growled from the doorway.

He looked livid, and about to snap. Renee spun towards his voice,
sneering at his appearance.

I shook my head at him, wanting him to understand that I was going to
deal with this, but apparently Edward has heard enough and was no
longer willing to remain silent.

"I wasn't speaking to you, so shoo."

Edward laughed, never taking his eyes from her as he did it.

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"Look, Renee. I'm not your child, so I don't feel the need to bite my
tongue. However, I've remained silent because of Bella, but after the
way you just spoke to her, I really can't do that anymore. I refuse to let
you walk in here and ruin everything Bella has achieved.

There was a snort of derision, as I tried to regulate my breathing. I knew
I was on the verge of an anxiety attack. I'd only had one before; the
night I found Tyler. My vision was becoming spotty, as I lowered myself
onto the couch. I could hear them snarling and yelling at each other. I
tried to zone them out, to allow myself time to regroup, but the
screaming got louder.

"You have no rights over this house! You were told to get out after he
died! If you think seducing Isabella is a way of getting your grubby little
mitts on it, you're wrong. I would rather the place burned to the ground!"

"Oh, Renee, your hatred is only isolating you more from your daughter."
Edward smiled coldly. "I have no idea why, but she loves you and wants
your approval. I can see she's never going to get that..."

"Not while she has you and that little tramp. No," she interrupted.

"Wrong. You'll never give her your complete approval. You can't, can
you? Why is that? A lack of love for her? Hate? Jealousy?..."

Renee winced.

"Bingo! You're jealous of your own daughter?"

I watched, stunned as she picked up her purse and stalked towards the
door. Before she opened it, she turned to me, her face contorted in
anger.

"You want me to go? Is this your choice? Him? Her?"

I gulped and croaked out, "I want you to understand."

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"Understand what? You called time on your marriage to a lovely man to
come here and shack up with him?"

"Edward," I said softly. "His name is Edward."

"And why would that matter to me?"

I felt Edward's hand touch my shoulder, his thumb stroking soothingly
along the collarbone. His hand was shaking, or was that me? I simply
couldn't tell anymore.

"Mom, please. We need to sort this out. Tyler wasn't lovely. You know
what he did to me; how I found him. After that it's not wonder I needed
to start over. I couldn't face seeing the same places, the same people,
because they all reminded me of what I'd lost. Why did you never help
me? Why did you blame me for what he did?" I cried.

Edward's hand squeezed my shoulder, but I shook him off. I was
beginning to gain some composure and didn't need his sympathy
making me cry again.

"You saw what you wanted to see."

I stood quickly, anger clawing its way free.

"Did you ask him? Because I'm pretty sure you haven't. How the hell
could I misconstrue another man's dick in his mouth?"

"Don't be so crude," she snapped.

"You've always made you own decisions about things that have
happened and never bothered to actually ask about them. I bet it was
the same with granddad. I bet he was having this exact same argument
with you years ago, trying to get you to see reason. I understand now
just how futile that is. You'll never see passed your own hatred, will
you? That's why dad always kept Aro informed about me, isn't it? Dad

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knew just how stupid and pathetic your argument with him was. Christ,
I've spent my life trying to please you, but I get it...I'd never do that,
because you'll always see the failing. I've been stupid."

"You've been a daughter." Edward interjected.

I turned, glaring at him.

"Don't," I warned, before turning back to my mother.

She had her hand on the door, ready to leave.

"So, you've made your decision then? Them over me? I've very
disappointed in you Isabella."

"You've said that," I sighed. "...and for the record, I was never given the
choice. If not Edward and Alice, then it would have been someone,
something else. I'm tired, Mom. I'll never be good enough for you, but
before you go I have somethings to put straight. This house is mine. He
left it to me because you clearly didn't give a shit about your father.
Alice is your sister, whether you choose to accept it or not, and in some
ways maybe she's better off as she is. At least she knew from the start
that there was no pleasing you. It's taken me my whole life. I feel
stupid."

"BB..." Edward started.

I continued without acknowledging him.

"Our home will always be open to you, but my family includes Edward,
Alice and Newton. I'm not the one making demands here. I'm just
stating a fact."

My heart pounded, as I waited for her to answer. A small glimmer of
hope began to grow when I saw the tears in her eyes, but that light was
soon put out when she opened the door and started to walk through it.

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"Renee, don't leave your daughter like this. You'll only regret it." Edward
stated, his voice gruff.

She never turned back, but her words were clear.

"Never speak to me again."

I buckled.

I fell to floor and began to sob quietly. I didn't know if she was talking to
Edward, or to me when she uttered those words, and in truth, it didn't
matter. The whole argument had taken less then forty minutes and had
gone the exact way Edward had warned me it could. I could hear the
car drive away, and realized it really was the end. My mother wasn't
going to come back here. She wasn't going to visit when the house was
renovated. She wasn't going to sleep in the newly constructed bedroom,
nor would she be a part of my new family. Edward had promised I would
never be alone again, but right now I'd never felt more isolated.

I clutched at my stomach, bile rising in my throat, and I gagged and
gasped for air.

Alone.

I was all alone.

I had no one.

I felt arms hug me close, but I fought against them, not wanting the
comfort. My vision blurred, and it wasn't from the tears. At the same
time a ringing began in my ears. Black spots appeared before my eyes,
and moments before the darkness consumed me I heard Edward
whisper my name.

/ T

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I could hear them outside the bedroom door, as I came around. I could
hear the pity in Alice's voice, and the sadness in Edward's.

"She's been out for hours now, Edward. I think you should call a
doctor."

"No. She'll be fine, Ali. She just needs her mind to digest everything
that's happened. Have you tried?"

"Yes," she sighed. "I've tried calling her repeatedly, but either it rings out
or goes to the answer machine. Do you really think she meant it? Oh,
Edward, she can do what she wants to me, I expect it, but BB had no
idea just how evil she could be."

There was a shuffling, and I assumed they were hugging. It sounded
liked she'd tried to call my Mom. I turned onto my side, not sure what to
make of that. The skin on my face felt raw and taut where the tears had
rolled continually across it. My whole body felt bruised.

"Maybe I should call Rose," Edward whispered. "BB has grown close to
her."

There was a light tapping as someone walked down the stairs, swiftly
followed by the bedroom door creaking open. I lay still, knowing it was
Edward, because my body was instantly on alert.

He tilted and lowered his head,bringing it level with mine, and smiled.

"Hey," he said softly.

I swallowed.

"BB?"

I turned onto my other side; my back to him. The mattress dipped as he
climbed into bed with me, placing his arm around my waist. His lips

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were next to my ear, and I could feel the ebb and flow of the air as he
breathed. I stiffened. I didn't blame him for what happened, or how it
happened, but I needed space. I needed to deal with this alone,
because that's what I was now.

Alone.

"Tell me you're OK. Tell me you hate. Tell me you want us to leave, just
talk to me. Please."

I said nothing, and he hugged me tighter.

"Alice is going to call Rose. You'd like to talk to her about this, right?"

Silence.

"BB, please? I need to hear your voice," he pleaded.

I couldn't. I opened my mouth, but nothing would come out. My throat
felt like it had closed up.

He shuffled as close to me as he could to my body, his knees fitting like
a puzzle piece under mine, as his lips kissed my neck softly. A tear
trickled across my face and onto the pillow below me. Guilt consumed
me. It wasn't his fault, but he was swamping me with kindness I couldn't
deal with right now. I wanted to wallow in my sadness.

"Newton's been pining for you outside the bedroom door. He senses
that something is wrong with you."

"Edward..." I whispered.

"Oh, thank Christ! Talk to me."

"Please leave me alone."

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I felt his deep exhale before he replied, "No."

"I need time to think. I don't want to get angry with you. Just go."

He removed his arm from my waist, and climbed off the bed. He kissed
my shoulder, and stated, "I'll be back in a little while."

"No. You need to leave me be tonight."

"You don't want me in our bed while we sleep?" he asked incredulously.

I could hear the hurt in his voice, and felt the guilt rise again.

"I want to be left alone," I repeated.

"BB," he begged. "Don't do this."

I said nothing, turning my face into the pillow and ignoring his presence.
After a few short moments he left, slamming the door behind him. I
winced as wood hit wood with a loud clap. I was punishing the wrong
person, and I knew it, but I didn't want to feel anything other than hurt,
and Edward made me feel so much.

Seeking solace from the one person who couldn't offer it, I reached into
the beside table and retrieved one of granddad's letters. I didn't know
what I expected to find, but I just knew I needed to see his words.

I opened the letter, and began to read; the tears tumbling onto the pillow
as I did.

Dearest Bella,

It's been six months since your mother took you away, and it looks as
though I won't be seeing you any time soon. I'm terribly saddened. I so
looked forward to our summers of fun, and I refuse to believe that they
will never happen again. I'm writing this as a way of cleansing my soul,

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though the hurt in my heart shall remain forever, or until I see your
pretty little face again.

Edward is heartbroken. He asks about you often, and I'm never sure
what to say. He's coming to live with me. The poor boy needs a lot of
love, otherwise I fear he will wilt instead of flourish into the man I know
he will be.

I want you to know I did everything I could to reason with your mother,
but was not willing to chose one daughter over another. Your fate is
now in the hands of your mother. I just hope she will make the right
choice and return you to me soon. I dreamed last night of us all on the
beach many years from now. You were happy with Edward, cuddling
near the tide, and Alice was skipping along the sand. When I woke and
realized it wasn't reality, I cried.

I love you, Isabella.

Be happy, Be safe.

Granddad

xxx

I hadn't realized Newton had entered the room, until he started to lick
the tears from my face. Unable to control myself, I pushed my face into
his fur and wept.

Aww, poor Bella.

Thank you xx

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23. Chapter 23: Resolutions

Hi, thanks for all the reviews.

The last 2 chapters will be avaliable shortly.

Thanks to Maylin, my beta queen, elusivekoolaid for being my
everything & Ninapolitan for being damn amazing.

SM owns all things Twilight.

EPOV

She didn't want me.

I'd waited for nothing, because she didn't want me if that meant losing
her mother.

I paced outside the bedroom, our bedroom, in the hope that she would
come out and hug me, but a day later she was still hiding in there. Alice
had tried too without any joy. My BB was shutting us out of her life, and
I didn't know what to do.

I knocked on the door again, hoping this time she would answer, but I
only got a muffled, "Go away."

I been sitting here most of the night, hearing her sob inside the room,
alone, but at her request I turned, intent on doing what she asked.
However, every instinct I had was screaming at me to get in there and
show her one person loved her, that not everyone had abandoned her.
Just like Aro hadn't done with me.

With that thought I barged through the door, shoving it open with force.
BB was lying on the bed curled into a little ball and doing nothing except
staring out of the window.

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"BB?"

"I told you to go," she moaned.

I walked around the side of the bed, kneeling at her head.

"You can't push me away. I won't walk out on you like she has, neither
will Alice."

She tried to turn and put her back to me, but I grabbed her shoulder,
tugging her back. She rolled her eyes, showing me she wasn't totally
defeated. It reminded me of the first day when she'd arrived, all passion
and fire. She'd made me hard before ever she'd started snarling.

"I can do what I want. I'm tired of being told what to do and when to do
it. Mom did it, Tyler did it and now you're doing it. Edward, leave me
alone," she demanded.

My throat constricted, and I replied hoarsely, "I can't. You mean too
much to me."

She groaned and flipped onto her back, tossing her arm across her
eyes. I noticed she'd showered and changed into her sweats, and felt
like a heel when I noticed how much her t-shirt had lifted and the lack of
bra. I shouldn't be checking her out when she was this upset. It was
wrong.

Trying to make her feel better was turning out harder than I'd thought,
but I wasn't going to give up. I wasn't going to lose her after
twenty-three years.

I took a deep breath and climbed onto the bed with her, hoping holding
her close would break down the wall she'd erected, but it had the
opposite effect. Bella shoved at my chest, practically hissing at me.
Instinctively, I covered her body with mine, pinning her to the bed
beneath me. She thumped at my shoulders and back.

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"Get the hell off me!"

"BB, stop. I'm here. I haven't left," I repeated, determined to get through
to her. "I love you."

Her punches became weaker, so I continued.

"BB, I want you. I waited for you. We can do this."

My voice cracked with emotion on the last words. The fact that I couldn't
help her was breaking my fucking heart. I hated Renee and vowed from
that moment on she would never be welcome in our home.

"I feel so alone," She whimpered.

Bella's fingers dug into my back, but it wasn't aggressively, she was
trying to get a grip on her emotions. I stayed blanketing her, and only
tried to touch her again when I heard snuffling. I swept the hair from her
face and looked into her watery eyes. She was crying again.

"Oh, BB..." I started.

"No. I need time, Edward. My mother just fucking disowned me, when
all I want is to be happy. I'm happy here!" she sobbed. "Why can't I
have you both?"

"I don't know, but you have to work with what you have. You have me,
Alice and this house. It's our home, honey."

She shifted a little under me, and I realized my weight was probably
crushing her. Slowly, so she couldn't get away, I moved her back
against my chest, holding her tightly against me. She began to sob right
away, huge gut wrenching cries filled the room and made me bleed right
along with her. I was determined she would never feel this empty again.
I would do everything in my power to help my BB. Everything.

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"I'm empty. You should go," she whimpered.

"Honey, I can't leave you when you feel so sad. It killed me to sit behind
that door last night and listen to you weep in here. You may not admit it,
but you need me. Just take this comfort and we can talk later."

She stilled and seemed to settle a little. I'm not sure how long we lay
there in silence, but as her breathing became steady I began to drift off.
I was exhausted but refused to sleep until she did. My eyes slowly
closed, but right before I succumbed I heard her whisper, "I will make it
right, Edward. I never want to hurt you. Don't leave me."

"Never," I stated vehemently.

/ T \\

When I woke she was gone and I instantly panicked.

I shot from the bed, scanning the room and looking for anything that
could tell me where she'd gone. It was late evening and dusk had set in,
so the room was dark, but I could see her shoes, jacket and purse had
all been taken. My heart crashed against my chest as I rushed from the
room. I needed to find her.

"Bella!"

Silence greeted me, scaring the shit out of me.

On the way down the stairs I looked out of the window, only to see her
truck had gone.

No!

My mind was screaming in denial as I entered the living room, frantically
searching the lower floor of the house, but to no avail.

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Why would she leave?

I walked from the house, my heart in my mouth, wondering where she
could be. Had she really gone? Had I hurt her by trying to get her to
admit what she felt for me? I knew I was aggressive, but I always tried
to be careful around her. However, this time too many emotions had
spilled over, and I'd been too busy licking my wounds to notice her
leaving.

My mind refused to accept the possibility that she could have gone
without saying goodbye. Alice was stepping into her bus and I yelled at
her. A huge grin spread across her face, but she remained on the other
side of the garden.

"Have you seen BB?"

Alice merely nodded.

"And?" I shouted impatiently.

"You'll see," she laughed, pointing behind me.

I turned and as if connected to her in some way, my body was leading
me out towards the beach. Forgetting all about Alice I started to walk. I
wasn't even dressed properly; still in my unbuttoned jeans, feet and
chest both bare. I'd done this before; the first night I'd had her on the
beach. It had been the night all my dreams had come to fruition, and I'd
been over come with emotion.

The wind whipped around the old house, as I quickly ascended the
porch steps. That was when I saw them.

A trail of little flames leading my way to the beach.

Hundreds of candles guiding my way towards the sand, and I could only
hope she was waiting for me. My heart swelled with hope, as I raced

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towards the end of the line of flickering lights. My feet fell heavily on the
grass, making it ooze dirt between my toes. I was cold, but I needed to
find her.

Apprehension weighed heavily, but I could only see this as being good,
as something I was going to like. Why else would she light each and
every one?

I hit the entrance to the beach at a run, but froze when I took stock of
what was waiting for me.

BB.

My BB.

She was standing next to a cluster of candles crying and waiting.

"BB?" I croaked.

She looked to me, her eyes glistening, as she toyed with the edge of
her top. I stepped closer, hoping she didn't retreat, and to my joy she
stayed where she was. I even got a small smile from her. My chest
clenched; I needed to touch her. I needed to know that we were going
to get through this, and that we were going to make it.

I tentatively tickled my fingers against hers where they touched her top.
I was encouraged by the fact that she took my hand in hers and gripped
it tightly.

"Talk to me," I whispered. "It's hurting."

Another tear trickled down her cheek, and she opened her mouth as if
to speak, but nothing came out.

"I don't want us to hurt. We should be happy, honey. So very happy."

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I lifted my free hand and smoothed the tear from her skin. I needed to
take away her sadness. I needed to ease her pain, so acting on instinct
I lowered my head to hers and kissed her softly. It was no more than a
soft touch of lips, but it told her I was here, and she couldn't push me
away.

"Bella, please. I can't take anymore of thinking that you hate me, or that
you're about to leave. I need to know..."

"I love you," she blurted out, stopping my heart.

I blinked twice at her, not actually sure she'd spoken those three words.
Her hand was shaking in mine, as she giggled a little and repeated, "I
love you." It was louder this time, as if she really believed it and wanted
to enforce it on me. I wanted to say it back and wrapped her in my
arms, but I couldn't speak.

Twenty-three years.

It had taken twenty-three years for my BB to come home and love me,
and every single year was worth the wait.

"You're supposed to say something now..."

"Oh, God, Bella, if you only knew the nights I've sat here, in this very
spot, or lay in our bed and dreamed of you saying those words to me. It
just doesn't seem real. I'm sorry, just give me a moment."

I closed my eyes, as the words rolled around my head. She loved me!

Her hands clamped to either side of my face, and she pulled it down,
making me open my eyes. We were almost nose to nose, when she
smiled making her whole face light up. Shadows flicked across her
cheeks, as her eyes continued to gaze at me. I couldn't deny what I saw
in them, the feelings were there, running down her skin, trapped in her
tears.

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"Tell me again," I asked, my voice gravelly.

"I love you. I really love you," she replied happily.

She barely managed to speak the last words, because I hauled her up
against me, cupping her ass and picking her up. She laughed, wrapping
her arms around my shoulders at the same time her legs folded around
my hips. We hugged tightly, both lost in the moment. Her breath
caressed my neck and her hair floated across my face, but I couldn't
move her. Ever. I just breathed her in.

BB was finally all mine.

My legs gave out, and she ended up flat on her back with a humph. I
tried not to fall on her, bracing myself with my arms. Her legs stayed
around my waist, but her hands stroked up my bare chest and throat,
until she was cupping my face again.

"I'm sorry I shut you out. I needed space and time and you were too
intense. I was just too raw."

I rested my forehead against hers and inhaled her scent, along with the
salty sea air.

"I should have given it to you. I try to be careful around you, but I feel so
protective, and I could only hold back so long when she started spitting
the venom."

Bella nodded, rubbing her nose against mine. The knot in my chest
untangled, allowing me to breathe freely, and I grinned down at her.

"You actually did well with my Mom, but it was afterward, and today,
Edward. I've told you before, you can suffocate me sometimes. My
world had just crumbled around me, and I rejected everyone not just
you."

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I kissed her chin, skimming my hand up her waist and resting it just
below her breast. She arched into me, making my groin begin to throb.
This was going one way, and by the way her hips were pushing against
mine, it was going there quickly.

"I told you how difficult it is for me to deal with you turning your back on
me. You know I'm intense, dominant and sometimes aggressive, but
BB, I would never hurt you. You have to know that, and it's your Mom's
loss that she doesn't want a part of this beautiful place, or your
wonderful life, not yours. I want you here. I've always wanted you here."

"I know," she whispered. "I really do, but I had to figure that out for
myself. When you climbed into bed today and tried to make me see it, it
didn't work, because no one can be made to. It's taken me a long time
to actually find myself, but I finally have, Edward." She giggled loudly,
happiness spilling out from every pore. "This is me, and I like it. I love
our house. I love our dog and our little family, and if my Mom doesn't
want a part of that, then so be it. I have what I need..." she kissed my
chin again, and squeezed her thighs tighter. "...and that's you. Do I have
to tell you again?"

"Yes."

"I love you."

"I promise you, I'll never tire of hearing you say that."

She became serious, her features intense as she said, "Take me
Edward. Make me yours."

"Oh, Bella," I breathed. "You've always been mine. Tell me you know
that."

"I do, and instead of feeling trapped I feel wanted and loved for the first
time in a long time."

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"That's because you are. So very much."

I didn't wait for her to reply. I moved my lips to hers and kissed her
fiercely, pouring every emotion that was raging through my veins into
the kiss. My hips pushed against hers, thrusting my throbbing

erection towards the apex of her thighs. I hissed as my sensitive flesh
hit the denim of my jeans. I wanted her terribly. It was an angry need to
consummate our love, and what better place to do it than here? The
place where it all began and almost the exact spot I'd taken her for the
very first time.

I licked her lower lip and kissed a slow trail along her jaw, grazing my
teeth along the column of her neck. She purred and pushed her flesh
closer to my mouth. I skimmed my hand up from her breast, moving her
arm above her head as I did so. Without touching the other one, she
lifted that too, allowing me to pin them to the sand at her wrists. At the
same time she thrust her chest upwards, demanding my attention. My
mouth salivated, and I became harder than I'd ever been. I wanted in,
and I wanted it now.

I nipped at her collarbone, knowing I was leaving marks but doing it
intentionally. My chin moved her top from her breast exposing her pert
pink nipple to me. It tightened as the sea breeze caressed her; a tight
tiny bud begging for my attention. I didn't need to be asked. My mouth
descended, bestowing long languid licks to her nipple.

"Yes," she sighed, wriggling against my grip, but not enough to want to
be free.

BB was now not only used to the way I liked sex, but she was enjoying
it too. We fit together in so many ways, more than I'd ever imagined.

I impatiently freed my cock from the denim with my available hand,
gasping as the cold air floated across it, before tickling my fingers up
under her skirt and teasing the edge of her panties.

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"Edward."

I wanted her as eagerly as she wanted me, but I was going to give her
something to remember; something for us both to cherish.

"Shh," I said softly, skimming my index finger along her wet slit and
around between her buttocks. She bucked against me, murmuring for
more and, wanting to please her, I repeated the action. My hand still
held her wrists firmly, as she opened her legs wider, allowing me to
adjust myself closer between them. My cock nestled between her warm,
wet folds, her panties pushed to the side, and if it could it would have
begged for entry. I gazed down at her, shadows cast from the candles
flickered across her face, but I could still see the flush to her cheeks.
Her chest was rising and falling rapidly; her body undulating underneath
me. It made her pussy rock against my cock, and I bit down on the
raging hunger that clawed through my system. We were still clothed, but
it was of little significance, and chances are they would remain. Things
were spiraling out of control very quickly, and it was taking all the
strength I had not to bury myself balls deep into her right now.

BB clearly didn't feel the need to prolong this, because she swirled her
hips and brought the head of my erection to her needy entrance.

"I'm..."

She lifted her head and kissed me, stopping my words. I relaxed into it
as I slowly started to enter her delicious body. My arms trembled, and I
had to break our lips apart when my breathing became stuttered. We
moaned in unison as I thrust into her. Her lips parted, her eyes shining
bright. I could still see the tracks her tears had made, and one by one
tried to remove them. With my free hand I stroked her breasts, her
throat and her cheek, gaining little exhales of joy form her.

She took me deeper, wrapping her legs around my hips and locking her
ankles. I dropped my head for a moment, trying to gain some
composure. I didn't want to lose my shit this soon, but the sounds

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coming from her lips, and the way her body was reacting to mine, were
forcing my body to completion sooner than expected.

"Oh, BB," I said reverently, as my hips moved faster. "So good. So
fucking good."

"Edward, please. I need...I need...harder."

She didn't have to ask twice. I began to piston my hips with force at the
same time I pushed my thumb into her mouth.

She immediately began to suck, her lips doing to my thumb what her
pussy was doing to my cock, all the while I held her arms above her
head. I kept her laid out for me. Our eyes where locked, both focused
on what we were doing to each other. I could feel her tongue swirling
around the pad of my thumb and her teeth nibbled at the flesh, as her
pussy clenched around me, holding me tighter.

As my abdomen tightened with my coming orgasm I rested my forehead
against hers, and let go of her arms. They instantly wrapped around my
shoulders, holding me close, and we both said together, "I love you."

Moments later I was riding the crest of my completion, filling her with my
seed and making us both breathless from the force of my thrusts.
Guttural groans rumbled from low in my chest, only made worse when I
began to feel her own spasms. She bit down on my thumb, whining as
she came harshly. Her back arched, thrusting her breasts against me,
and clawing desperately at my back.

"Fuck!" I snarled. "Yes!"

This was how I wanted her, and I couldn't believe I'd ever get enough.

I exhaled loudly, flopping on top of her. She cradled my head to her
chest and combed her fingers through my hair. Between that, and the
melodic flow of the sea, I was calmed. I felt complete and happy for the

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first time in my life.

Underneath my ear, her heart slowly steadied, and I nuzzled my nose
up to her neck, breathing her unique scent.

"I didn't mean to be rough with you, BB."

She giggled, placing her finger under my chin and tilting my face up to
hers. Instead I chose to turn us onto our sides, leaving us face to face.
Our legs entwined, and her arm rested on my hip, as I stroked her hair
from her cheek.

"You weren't, and I don't recall complaining."

"This all seems unreal, even though I waited. How did you do all this?"

"Alice helped. We sneaked out while you slept. I told her I had to make
it right with you. I had to apologize."

I kissed her nose, stroking her back tenderly. "No you didn't. You're
hurting and I get that."

She smiled at me, making any doubt disappear. I needed to tell her a
million times over that I adored her, and went to speak when she
giggled and said, "So...do I get an answer?"

I frowned completely confused. It only made her laugh more; a
complete contrast from when I'd found her here.

"What?"

"You didn't see it, did you? The candles. Edward, I don't want to let go,
but please stand up and look at them. Please?" Her voice trembled.

Tentatively, I let go and slowly stood up, adjusting my jeans and staring
at the little flames, trying to understand what she was referring to. I

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moved my gaze from Bella to the candles, but she wasn't giving
anything away. She'd pulled herself up and was sitting with her arms
wrapped around her knees. Waiting.

I looked back, and instantly saw it. My heart felt like it was about to leap
from my chest. The candles were laid out in the form of two words. Two
words that I had waited for from the moment my ball hit her sandcastle.

MARRY ME.

Just one more chap and the Epi left.

Thank you xx

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24. Chapter 24: Love

This is the last chapter before the epi.

Thank you to every single one of you that stuck with me from the
start.

Love to my amazing beta Maylin & my amazing bestie
elusivekoolaid.

SM owns all things Twilight.

BPOV

MARRY ME.

I waited with baited breath for him to answer. The tears were starting to
well again. The candles had taken forever to place and light, and
standing here watching the realization dawn across his face, it had all
been worth it.

I'd lain in our bedroom running through every possible outcome in my
head, and it all came back to one person.

Edward.

I simply couldn't live without him. I wanted him to be my fairytale, and I
wanted him to help me write my page. He'd said once that it was my
choice when I wrote it, and at the time I hadn't believed him, but he was
right. He always seemed to be right.

Edward was my happy ever after.

He was staring at the candles, mouth open, totally stunned, and when
he finally moved I thought he was going to speak to me. He didn't. He

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pulled his cigarettes and lighter from the back pocket of his jeans and
tried to light one. The problem was his hand was shaking so much, he
couldn't do it.

I reached out to him, hoping I wasn't reading him wrong, and stilled his
hand by wrapping my fingers around his wrist. He took a deep drag and
only looked at me as he exhaled.

"Fuck, BB..." he breathed shakily.

My heart stopped. Had I gotten this all wrong? Had I completely messed
this up?

"This is beyond any dream I could ever have had. You...fuck...BB, you
really want this? Me?"

I nodded, amazed at this small show of insecurity. I tried to say
something further, but he held his fingers up, silencing me as he took
another drag. I'd never seen him this anxious, and it was making me
second guess my decision.

I stared at him while he finished his cigarette. I remembered being
transfixed by his mouth as it sucked on the end so many times, but now
I couldn't concentrate on it. The emotion was threatening to choke me.
It was only after he'd flicked the stub into the sea that he tried to speak
again.

"I'm sorry. I know this wasn't what you expected my reaction to be. I'm
stunned."

I reached out intending to stroke his arm, but he suddenly came
forward, pulling my body to his, and before I could squeak in surprise he
had me up against him, my legs around his waist. His right hand cupped
my ass, as his left smoothed my hair from my face. His green eyes were
shining with tears that were threatening to fall. I didn't want him to cry. I
just wanted him to tell me this was OK.

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"Edward, you're beginning to worry me. Please talk to me."

He kissed my nose, and then my chin, before finally smiling at me. It
was huge, and created little crinkles on his cheeks.

"I just needed a moment, BB."

"And now that you've had that?" I questioned cautiously.

"I just feel like an ass...," he shrugged.

"I'm confused."

"Because I should have said yes. Yes, yes, Fucking hell, YES!" he
shouted, spinning us around.

I laughed loudly, relief flooding my system. But before I could say
anything I found myself flat on my back, and gasping for breath.

Edward's hands pushed into my hair, as he angled my head so his lips
connected firmly on mine. I didn't have a chance to digest his answer,
as his entire body swamped me. I was being touched, kissed, licked
and moved into whatever positions he wanted; aroused beyond
anything I'd known before, as he gripped my throat and pressed his
thumb into my mouth.

"Fuck, I need you, BB. I need you again. Now."

I licked at the pad of his thumb, watching his pupils dilate.

"I'm not stopping you," I whispered.

He frowned, clearly debating something, before saying, "I don't think I
can be gentle with you. I need to make this true; to make you mine."

My answer was to nip at his thumb, and grind my hips against his.

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From that instant I lost the ability to think of anything but how he felt
surrounding me. We became a bundle of sensations; skin against skin,
tongue against tongue, and arousal grinding arousal. What few clothes
I'd had left on were flung across the beach, along with his jeans, and I
was adjusting my hips when he thrust fiercely into me. I gasped at the
sudden intrusion, but sighed as my body stretched to accommodate
him. Each forceful thrust made my insides clench and my breathing
stutter. When he removed his thumb, skimming it down my throat, and
cupping my breast, I began mumbling and gasping incoherently. My
head thrashed from side to side and my heels pushed into his ass. I
wanted him closer, needed him harder, but in true Edward style, he
sensed my need and began to pull out.

"Oh no!" I smiled, shaking my head and moving my leg to unbalance
him.

The air whooshed from his lungs as he landed on his back. I
immediately straddled him, and speared myself on his cock. He lifted
his hands, and I rocked slowly, as our palms met and our fingers
interlaced. Our eyes locked, as did our bodies and hands, waiting to be
joined in as many ways as possible.

Edward began pushing back, lifting his hips from the sand and trying to
pull me flat against his chest, but I was already careering towards my
climax, and I began to ride him harder. He hissed and squeezed my
hand tighter. His face contorted a little and his abdomen began to
twitch. A heartbeat later and we were both screaming into the night,
both burning as our orgasms consumed us.

I flopped onto his slick chest, panting for breath. His hand skimmed my
back, making me shiver.

"So that's definitely a yes then?" I said against his flesh.

His fingers burrowed into my hair, gripping until I looked into his eyes.

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"Isabella Swan, I've loved you since the moment I ruined that damn
castle of yours. I've waited for you, sent mementos to you. Fuck, I lived
in a house with no electricity, all of it for you. So what on earth would
make you think I'd say no? I'd marry you tomorrow if I could."

"I think that would be a little soon," I giggled.

"Never. Ask me again, BB. Let me get it right this time."

I pushed up on his chest, but still kept eye contact, before asking softly,
"Edward Masen, I love you and don't want to imagine my life without
you. I want to grow old with you, here, in our little house by the beach.
Will you marry me?"

"I've never considered being with anyone else. You're it for me. You're
my sandcastle. Yes, BB, yes, I'll marry you."

His voice broke on the last word, emotion slipping from his control. I
lowered back down, wrapping my arms around him, and weeping gently
into his shoulder. His hold was fierce, like two bands of steel keeping
me close, not that I wanted to go anywhere.

I shivered as the sea breeze swept across the beach. Some of the
candles flicked out, and I felt Edward exhale deeply underneath me. He
slowly levered us up to a sitting position, and held my face between his
palms.

"We should get into the house. It's cold and I don't want you getting
sick."

"That's sweet, being so concerned."

He shrugged. "Not really. I just make a fucking shitty nurse."

A huge smile broke across his face, making me laugh loudly.

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"I don't believe you."

He slapped my ass playfully, and I squirmed in response.

"You know what this means, though?" he began seriously.

"That you and Aro were right all along?"

Edward gave a low chuckle, before continuing. "Your mom? Marrying
me will seal the deal as far as she's concerned. I don't want you to have
to make a choice, but we need that out there."

"And now it is. The only choice I'm making is to be happy. If my mother
thinks that's wrong, then she's going to miss out. Can we drop it now?"

"Yup, now get your ass up off me so that we can go and shower. I have
sand in places that you wouldn't believe."

I climbed off him and looked around for my clothes, but couldn't see
very clearly because the candles had gone out. Edward stood up and
held out his hand. He pulled me to standing and kissed my forehead. As
usual, he had no problems with being out in the open completely naked.
His fingers linked with mine and he started to walk from the beach.

"Hey! I can't walk back naked, Edward!"

"Sure you can," he grinned, pulling on my arm. "Its dark, it's isolated.
There's no one around, BB. Do it."

I giggled nervously, as excitement made my nipples tighten. He knew
exactly what I was feeling, and lowered his head to my ear. He lapped
at my lobe and whispered, "Trust me, if you walk back to the house
naked, I guarantee the rest of the night will be like nothing you've ever
experienced before."

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I shivered in anticipation and began to walk across the sand. I couldn't
believe I was doing this. Sensing my anxiety, Edward shouted, "Race
you!"

We ran, laughing and squealing all the way to the house.

And Edward was right...it was a night unlike any other.

/ T \\

The next month, if I'm honest, was mostly spent discovering each other.

Intimately.

I'd like to say we'd spent it in bed, but we had sex in many more places.
Whenever Edward or I had an itch we managed to find a secluded spot
to scratch it.

The relationship was a revelation, and something that I knew happened
only once in a lifetime. Even with my mother's rejection, I was happy.
Happier than I'd even been.

I finished washing the dishes and gazed out of the window, across the
garden. Emmett was packing up his truck because he'd finished for the
day. I was so used to him being around now, and Rose had begun to
come with him some days. She wanted the company and was
becoming a very good friend to me, as was Alice. I didn't see her as my
Aunt. She was my friend and my confidant. She was always handy
when I needed someone to back me up against Edward too.

I adored him. He really was the love of my life, but sometimes he was a
little too much and I would need space. My job helped with that. A day,
or a night on assignment gave me the alone time I needed, and I was
always more than ready to come back home.

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I gazed down at my left hand, the ring glinting on my finger. It still
amazed me that I'd come here to discover myself, and yet, I'd
discovered a whole lot more.

"BB?" Edward's voice boomed into the house.

I turned and walked into the living room, smiling at his half naked form.
He'd just returned from his run, so his chest was sweaty and he was
slightly out of breath. His running shorts moved lower on his hips as he
inhaled deeply. I licked my lips involuntarily, making him raise a brow at
me.

"I can't help it!" I reasoned.

"Well, for once you'll have to. I have something to show you."

"Oh, really? I'm pretty sure I've seen everything you have to offer, Mr.
Masen," I teased.

Edward came forward, holding my chin with this thumb and finger, as he
said lowly, "BB, there are many things I've yet to show you, and every
one will get you panting." He paused then raised his voice again. "But
we can save that for later. Come with me."

I blinked at his change in tone, seductive one moment, business like the
next. He was always doing that to me, and knew I wouldn't have it any
other way. He certainly kept me guessing.

I nodded and followed him out of the house. Newton came bounding up
to me, wagging his tail. He trotted along beside us, as Edward led us to
the barn.

I frowned, wondering why it was important to bring me out here.

"When you arrived..." he started. "You told me the barn was mine to do
with as I pleased. It didn't matter what, as long as I moved in here in the

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end."

"Edward, I..."

"Shh, let me finish. From day one I knew there was no way I was going
to sleep in any other bed but ours, so I had to decide what to do with
this place."

I held my breath, hoping I was going to like the outcome.

"It was only after Alice arrived that I made that decision."

He opened the door and gestured for me to enter. I frowned at him, but
walked inside.

"Oh!"

"I hope you don't mind," he whispered, wrapping his arms around my
waist from behind me. "It's for Alice."

Edward had had the barn renovated into a small self contained living
space. It was nothing overly extravagant, with the raised loft space
being the only bedroom, but it would suit Alice perfectly. Maybe I should
have been annoyed, after all, he'd never intended to move out of the
main house, but I wasn't. I was thrilled. It was just more confirmation of
his complete faith in us.

I lifted my hand stroking his cheek, and feeling the roughness of his
stubble.

"It's wonderful. Alice is going to adore it, and I really hope she stays."

"Me too, BB. I love you."

My heart stopped whenever he said those words to me, and I wondered
if it always would. His hand began skimmed up my ribs, underneath my

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tank.

"What are you up to Mr. Masen?" I smiled.

"Finishing what your mind started back at the house."

He licked my neck in one long stroke, almost making my knees buckle.
They eventually gave way when he cupped my breast and tweaked my
nipple. I groaned as I ended up slammed against the barn door. His
mouth devoured mine, his tongue penetrating. My whole body came
alive with need for Edward.

My leg hitched around his knee, but he grasped my thigh, pulling it
higher. I panted when he ground his erection into my stomach and
began nipping at my neck. He knew just how to drive me crazy; it
seemed like he always had done.

"We can't do this here!" I squealed, when his fingers began toying with
my panties.

"Sure we can. Let's christen it."

"It's not ours..." His fingers stroked my slit. "Not ours to christen."

"I've not given it to Ali yet, so it's mine, and I really need to be inside of
you."

"Oh, God."

"Oh, yes," he shot back, grinning and rocking his hips.

The tip of his thumb flicked across my clit and my bones melted into a
pool of lust.

"You see, the problem is you made me get rid of my porn collection," he
teased. "And now I need you to take the edge off."

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"You promised to corrupt me," I moaned, pushing my hips closer to his
hand.

He licked my lower lip slowly, speaking against it. "I think I already
have, but porn could be so much fun."

Edward pulled away sharply, leaving my body bereft, and started to
walk from the barn.

"Edward?" I whined, totally confused.

He wiggled his eyebrows at me, a small smirk playing across his lips.

"There's no TV in here, BB. We need a TV."

My jaw dropped. He was serious? I shouldn't be surprised, this was the
kind of stuff he pulled on a regular basis. I'd learned to adjust very
quickly to him, though.

My body was still buzzing from his playful fingers, as we strolled back to
the house. He picked up my hand and kissed my engagement ring. We
walked up the steps, but stopped on the porch. He turned to me, his
face serious.

"Are you happy, BB? Is this what you want? Me? Alice? Newton?"

He sounded so uncertain. Edward rarely showed this side of himself, so
I knew he needed the answer.

I reached up, holding his face between my palms and smiled.

"Yes, Edward. I want it all. I adore you and this place. I couldn't imagine
being anywhere else now."

"Good."

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"There's only one thing missing..." I said wistfully.

"Aro?"

I nodded, knowing he felt the same. I moved my arms to his waist,
resting my head on his chest, feeling the steady thump of his heart; the
heart that had loved me for twenty-three years.

"Did you ever finish reading his letters?" he asked, kissing the top of my
head.

"No. I'm not ready to let go." I swallowed the sadness. "Maybe one day."

I felt Edward nod as he steered us inside.

Inside our house.

A home that had been here, even when I was not.

Just like Edward.

SOBS...

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25. Epilogue: Completion

I want to thank so many people...

Maylin - Lady, I adore you and the amazing job you do of making
my words look pretty.

elusivekoolaid... you are my life now :P

hunterhunting and twirlgrrl - thank you for joining to ride!

The ladies on my Twilighted thread, on UU & the usual faces on
Twitter... I heart you all.

The end...

SM owns all things Twilight. I have yet another completed fic.

EPOV

"Jacob Aro Masen, get back here now!"

I smiled, waiting for the little tornado that was my son to stomp onto the
beach. He would be followed by my wife. She was clearly annoyed at
him and I tried to hide my grin. Jacob had gained his stubbornness from
both of us, so demanding he return to the house wasn't going to work,
and BB knew it.

It would be our tenth anniversary next week. Ten years since that day
all my dreams had come true, and I had opened my eyes to see her
standing in our bedroom. That was the day we marked on the calendar
and that was the day, exactly a year later, we married.

On this very beach.

25. Epilogue: Completion

396

It was in the exact spot we'd met, and the spot we'd finally come
together.

I'd already begun to plot for some alone time with her. Rose and
Emmett had agreed to look after Jacob and the new baby, but I
wondered if BB would be ready to leave her. Hallie was only eight
weeks old, and was the light of our lives. She had BB's big brown eyes,
but the poor little darling had my horrendously messy hair. No matter
how long we spent taming it, within ten minutes it had popped back up.

I'd originally wanted Alice and Jasper to care for them, but they were in
Italy visiting Alice's mom. They'd gone to show off their daughter,
Maisie. Alice and BB had been pregnant at the same time, and the girls
had been born only days after each other.

Alice and Jasper still lived in the converted barn across the garden, only
they'd renovated it to their own tastes now. I loved every moment of
having me family close to me. This was how it was meant to be. Just as
Aro had envisaged.

Rose and Bella were closer than ever, and when Alice joined them it
was safer to leave them to it. They could chat for hours, setting the
world to rights. Many times I'd gone to the barn, or to Emmett's to get
away from the giggles and the banter.

"Jacob!" she shouted again, and moments later my son came running
across the sand.

"Dad, I didn't do anything. I swear!"

I placed my laptop onto the blanket at the side of me and looked up at
him.

"So why's your Mom calling for you? She seems angry, Jake."

He pouted, toeing the sand absently and muttering.

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"Jake," I warned.

"I woke Hallie. Dad, I didn't mean to. Really. I just forget sometimes."

I nodded and patted the space beside me, wanting him to sit. He was
right. Jacob had had almost nine years without needing to consider
another child in the house. It stood to reason that sometimes he would
simply forget, but I would wait to hear BB's side of the situation. We
worked as a team, that included chastising our children.

Jake flicked at the sand; the same sand he was conceived on. The
memory made me smile. It had been the night my wife had proposed.
The night of a thousand candles, and the night she'd told me she loved
me.

The best night of my life.

"Running to your dad isn't going to help, Jake." Bella said, as she
walked towards us.

My breath caught. Even after all these years she still made me
breathless. I could never truly believe she was mine. That even though
I'd been nothing but a child, it warmed me to know I'd still been right.

Her eyes fixed on mine, making me see how tired she was. She needed
a break. Hallie nuzzled into her chest, obviously not too disturbed by
Jake's interruption of her nap. Without thinking I held out my arms,
wanting to cuddle my daughter. BB smiled warmly, passing her to me
cautiously.

Hallie sighed and snuggled into the crook of my arm, making my heart
swell and my throat constrict. I kissed her forehead, smelling her
powdery scent and gazed at my BB. She was watching us with tears in
her eyes.

"Sorry, Mom," Jake whispered, breaking our silence.

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"Right now, buddy, I'm more annoyed that you ran off. Please don't
think going to you dad will save you, either."

Jake winced and ducked his head at BB's stern tone. I could tell she
wasn't that annoyed at him though. I'd heard much worse from her and
it had been directed at me.

"Can one of you explain what happened?" I asked quietly.

My wife stared at Jake, waiting for him to spill the beans on the
situation, and he finally muttered about his ball and the stairs. It
appeared he'd knocked the bassinet with his soccer ball. Hallie had only
been asleep for a few minutes after BB had tried to get her to nap for
over thirty.

Jake looked at me sheepishly and apologized again, before reaching
out and stroking Hallie's tiny toes. I looked at BB, hoping she was going
to go easy on him.

"Go on," she sighed, pointing to the boys further down the beach
playing soccer.

"Thanks Mom," he said excitedly, as he rushed off towards his friends.

Bella took the spot he'd just vacated and leaned against me. Her arm
came around us, resting on our daughters belly. I kissed the top of her
head and heard a little sigh escape from her lips. It reminded me so
much of what Hallie had just done when I cuddled her.

"You're tired BB. You need a break. Why don't you leave the kids with
me? Go back to the house, take a bath and take a nap."

I waited for her to argue with me, but instead she cuddled closer. She
worried me, she still tried to take everything on herself, but she no
longer felt so alone.

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We'd contacted Renee when we'd decided on the wedding date, and
again when we'd discovered Bella was pregnant, but hadn't heard a
single thing from her. Bella had flat out refused to tell her when she was
carrying Hallie, so I'd gone behind her back and done it anyway. There
had been little point. Renee never replied.

The day she'd left here and been the last time Bella had seen her, and
although it had devastated her she wasn't going to let it hold her back.
She'd moved on. She saw me and Alice as her family, just as Aro had
prophesied.

"When did she last feed?"

"Just before her nap. She should be good for another couple of hours."

"Then go. You need to rest."

She moved slightly, lifting her face to mine and kissing my chin.

"I love you, Mr. Masen."

"The feeling is mutual, Mrs. Masen. Now go to bed." I lowered my voice.
"I need you completely rested, because I intend to take advantage of
you in the most delicious of ways."

She chuckled and raised her mouth to my lips. We kissed slowly and
tenderly, but before she pulled away I nipped at her lower lip. Hallie
stirred in my harms, as if sensing the increase in my heart rate.

"I think it's about time I took advantage of you." She stood, but kissed
Hallie and I one last time before whispering into the wind, "It's been a
long time coming, but I think I know just the thing."

I was hard in a matter of seconds. My lust for her had never subsided, it
just had to be controlled now we had two children.

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I watched her leave, hoping she really would rest. Hallie was still
squirming in my arms, so I adjusted her, cupping her little bottom in my
palm, and setting her head on my shoulder. Her nose stroked the crook
of my neck, and I could feel her breathing against the skin. I hugged my
daughter while watching my son play soccer. The beach was filling up,
and they wouldn't be able to play for much longer without
inconveniencing others. I wanted to shout to get his attention, but it
would wake the baby. So I waited, hoping he'd look over to me.

While I watched I remembered, from the time I saw my BB until today,
and all the amazing experiences in between. I wouldn't change a thing.
Even though I'd waited twenty-three years for her; twenty-three years
that at times seemed too long, it had all been worth it to get to this
moment. I had my family.

I had my wife, and two precious children.

I really did have my dream.

"Hey!" A small voice shouted. "Watch it!"

I stared across the beach to a little girl. She was sitting on the beach
amongst a large amount of crumbling sand. It looked like it could have
once been a castle, and as soon as Jake went running over to her I
started laughing. He was talking to her, reaching out and rubbing her
back to stop her tears. When he called to his friends, my heart almost
stopped. It was like watching my past, like my own home movie brought
to life.

The little girl stopped crying and they began rebuilding the castle
together. Jake's friends left him, not even bothering to tell him they were
going. My son didn't appear to notice. He was entranced by the girl
building sandcastles...just like I had been with my BB.

He raced over to me, grinning widely.

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"Dad, my ball hit Nessie's castle. I'm helping her fix it."

Emotion closed my throat, and all I could do was nod and watch him run
back to her.

You know your life is complete when the tide saw no need to destroy
your sandcastle. It remained perfect on the beach.

My sandcastle was perfection.

Just like my life.

...crying...

Thank you for every single review...

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Document Outline

Table of Contents
1. Chapter 1: Decisions
2. Chapter 2: Waiting
3. Chapter 3: Sandcastles
4. Chapter 4: Swings
5. Chapter 5: Water
6. Chapter 6: Fairytales
7. Chapter 7: Towels
8. Chapter 8: Trees
9. Chapter 9: Bound
10. Chapter 10: Coffee
11. Chapter 11: Date Night
12. Chapter 12: Abandon
13. Chapter 13: Memories
14. Chapter 14: Secrets
15. Chapter 15: Bruised
16. Chapter 16: Fire
17. Chapter 17: Words
18. Chapter 18: Interlude
19. Chapter 19: Honesty
20. Chapter 20: Calm
21. Chapter 21: Ties
22. Chapter 22: Broken
23. Chapter 23: Resolutions
24. Chapter 24: Love
25. Epilogue: Completion

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Tides by lambcullen

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