A Fluffy Tale

Ann Somerville

These stories are a work of fiction. The names, characters,
places, and incidents are products of the writer’s
imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be
construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or
dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely
coincidental.

‘A Fluffy Tale 2: Warm and Fuzzy’ Copyright © 2011 by
Ann Somerville
Cover image

© ginvin2010

All Rights Are Reserved. No part of this book may be used
or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written
permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied
in critical articles and reviews.
For more information please visit my website at

http://annsomerville.net

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Published by Ann Somerville

Chapter 1

As Daniel opened the front door, Kani popped his head

out of Daniel’s pocket and chirped.

“You smell pizza too?” Kems never ate but for some

strange reason Kani found the scent of cooking pizza
irresistible. To Daniel, it meant food, and he was starving.
Something healthier for supper might have been better, but
the relief of not having to cook after an exhausting day, and
knowing Dee would have just pulled out one of the frozen
ones they’d made in bulk last week, made it difficult to feel
really guilty.

“Go find Veen and Lili. Go play,” he said, putting his

kem on the ground and patting his little grey bottom. Kani
squeaked and scampered off up the stairs.

He opened his mouth to tell everyone he was home, but

Dee bounced out of the kitchen before he could make a
sound. She came to a halt and put her hands on her hips.
“Well?” Her kem, Lili, perching on her shoulder, put her
head up with an identical expectant expression on her furry
little face.

“I start next Monday.”
Dee yelled and ran for him, Lili jumping off with a

squeak before she was squished in a sibling sandwich.
Daniel caught Dee up and swung her around. “You did it,”
she bellowed into his right ear. “Proud of you!”

“Thanks, Dee. Where’s Alex?”

“Alex!”
Daniel stuck a finger into his now deafened ear and let

her go so she could shout up the stairs. “Daniel got the job!
Come down.”

Alex thundered down the stairs and jumped straight at

Daniel. “Really? Are we going to be rich?”

Daniel grinned and ruffled his brother’s red hair. “Not

quite, squirt. Who’s hungry? I’m starving.”

“We’re having pizza,” Dee confirmed. Veen, Lili, and

Kani tumbled down the stairs, and Kani squeaked excitedly
as the magic word ‘pizza’ was mentioned. Dee bent and
picked up her kem. “Daniel, you should call Grandma.”

“I will, but after I eat. I didn’t have lunch.”
She pulled a face that reminded Daniel achingly of their

mother. “That’s a bad habit.”

“Nag, nag,” he said, tugging on her ponytail, then

scooping up Kani and putting him on his shoulder. “Come
on.”

As they ate the pizza, Daniel vowed that some of his new

salary would go towards better food. The pizza was
delicious but the household budget was tight, and he hated
opening the fridge and seeing all the discount stickers on the
new items, meaning Dee had been scouring the bargains
again. It took her time which she didn’t have to spare,
between her studies, her archery, looking after Alex while
Daniel had searched fruitlessly for a job that an unqualified

would-be engineer with no experience could do, and
spending a tiny number of hours of week socializing with her
friends—something Daniel was determined she should
continue to do. He didn’t want her turning into Alex’s
‘mother’—or his own.

“Maybe we should hire a cleaner once a week,” he said

after he wiped his mouth, burping a little.

“We can’t afford it,” Dee snapped.
He did a double-take, her outrage as uncharacteristic as it

was shocking. “It was just an idea, DeeDee. We can afford it
with me working—”

“No way. We can manage. The house is clean, right,

Alex?” Her little brother nodded vigorously.

“Yes, it is,” Daniel said, patting her arm. “But your

exams are coming up, and I’ll be out of the house all day—”

“No. You’re not working to pay for someone to do what

we can do ourselves. Mum would have hated that.”

“But she had a cleaner for a couple of years when Alex

was smaller....” He shut up, as the mulish set to his sister’s
jaw became something sadder, and her eyes started to fill. “It
was just an idea, Dee. I’m worried about you doing too
much.”

“You too.”
“I’m fine. We’re all fine, right, Alex?” His brother

nodded again. “There you go. I better go phone Grandma.
Alex, dishes.”

“You don’t have to tell me,” Alex grumbled, climbing off

the stool.

“No, I don’t. You’re a good kid. You’re both good kids.”
“Huh, you’re not exactly an old man,” Dee said, smiling a

little.

“Maybe not, but I have to fake being a responsible adult

now. Why don’t you go up and talk to Susan?”

“She’s got a new boyfriend.” She made it sound like

‘herpes’. “Natalie wanted me to go online though, when I
finish my assignment.”

“Need any help with it?”
“No, big brother, I do not need you to do my homework.

Go call Grandma and tell them I send my love.”

He grinned and went to his parents’ office to make the

call. He couldn’t call it ‘his’ office in his head, and never
would. His parents’ books and papers, their desks, were just
as they’d been left, and though Daniel had cleared a small
space for his own laptop, he couldn’t bring himself to disturb
the rest of it more than absolutely necessary. If he’d had any
inclination to, it would have disappeared after coming in one
afternoon and finding Dee curled around one of their
mother’s medical books, sobbing her heart out in their
mother’s chair. It was too soon to think of changing anything.
It probably always would be.

His grandmother took a long time to answer the phone

and even though this wasn’t unusual, Daniel’s chest still

tightened with anxiety. He couldn’t help having bad
associations with people not responding to his telephone
calls. He wondered if he would ever react normally to
perfectly ordinary things like building sites and unanswered
calls again.

Finally his grandmother’s voice came on the line.

“Daniel? How are you, dear?”

“I’m fine, Grandma. I just wanted to let you know I got a

job.”

“Oh, wonderful. Which one?”
“Personal assistant in a company which works with job

creation charities. Microloans and that kind of thing.”

“Oh goodness. I didn’t know you knew about that kind of

thing, dear.”

“I don’t. But the guy I’ll be working for says all that

matters is that I’m smart and willing to learn, which I am.”

“Well, I hope it goes splendidly for you.” She paused to

cough and Daniel’s chest got tight again. “How are the
children?”

“All good, and sending their love. How’s Grandpa?”
She paused and Daniel had a horrible feeling she was

preparing to deliver bad news. “He just finished the chemo
today. He’s tired, but holding up. He’ll be so pleased to hear
about the job.”

“As soon as Alex and Dee finish school this year, we’ll

come up. At least, they will. I don’t know if I’ll be able to

get holidays so soon.”

“That’d be lovely, dear. Alex knows not to be too noisy,

doesn’t he? Joseph hasn’t been sleeping well.”

“He’ll be good, Grandma. They’re great kids, you know

that.”

“You all are, dear. I wish we could have you here to

stay. It’s so worrying that you’re all so far away.”

“I know. Can’t be helped. I’ll call you again after I start

work next week, let you know how I’m getting on. And
you’ll let us know how Grandpa is?”

“Yes, of course. He’s doing as well as we hoped. You

mustn’t worry about us, dear.”

Some hope of that. “Tell Grandpa to get lots of rest.

Love you.”

“You too, Daniel. Love to you all.”
He hung up. He often wished he hadn’t felt it so important

to keep the family house and stay here, instead of moving
across the country. He hadn’t wanted to disrupt Dee and
Alex’s schooling, not on top of all the other changes in their
lives, and, selfishly, he hadn’t wanted to deal with the
hassle. When Grandma had the heart attack and then they
heard about Grandpa’s cancer, he’d felt paralysed by fresh
grief and worry, and that had made making a decision to
move even more impossible.

Too late now, after he’d spent months looking for a job

and finally got one. Now he’d have to make the best of it,

earn and save enough to give them security, let Dee and Alex
have the freedom to do the things their parents had wanted
them to do. If he could at least afford to send them to their
grandparents for the long hols, that would be something. It
would be good for all of them, and if he’d be a little lonely
for two months, it didn’t matter so long as the kids had a
much needed break and his grandparents had company.

Kani licked his face, and Daniel smiled at the gentle

touch. He patted his kem, who nuzzled affectionately under
his chin, reminding Daniel was still wearing his tie. He
tugged it off with a sigh. No hope that his new job would be
relaxed about such things. Anthony—“Call me Tony,” he’d
said—Noble, his new boss, had explained that the company
had a strict dress code to inspire professionalism in their
clients and confidence in their wealthy sponsors. Daniel
hated ties with a passion. But he hated denying his sister and
brother security and little luxuries even more. So ties were
in, at least until the bank account was a little healthier.

“Come on you, let’s go help Alex and Veen.” Kani

chirped, jumped down and scampered off towards the
kitchen. If only Daniel could feel so much innocent
excitement about his new job. Once he settled in, it would all
be easier. He just had to get through the first few weeks.

Chapter 2

“Spencer, have you time to come and meet my new

assistant and talk about the project?”

Spen patted Myko away from his mobile phone and

wagged his finger at his kem as he listened to the call through
his earpiece. “Sure, Tony. I’ll be along in ten minutes.”

Tony closed the call, and Myko made an odd little hiss as

Spen took his earpiece off to rub the spot behind his ear.
“What’s the matter with you?”

Myko sniffed but declined to give any more clues. Spen

could guess. His kem didn’t like Tony Noble for some
reason, and the signs of disapproval had only increased in
the six months since Noble had joined the company. Spen
didn’t have strong feelings one way or the other, except he
wished the high and mighties had picked a more IT literate
manager to supervise the implementation of the software
designed to coordinate communications between the
company, trainers and trainees. Although a more IT literate
manager might have interfered more, which would have been
definitely unwanted. Spen had very strong ideas about
managers stomping all over his department and his team.

He lifted his head and caught the eye of his deputy

manager, Jyoti. “Off to a meeting, number two. You have the
conn.”

She saluted with a grin. “Aye aye, captain.” Spen’s team

was one big geek hive, and he loved it.

Myko rode on his shoulder, chirping happily in greeting

to other people and their kems as Spen walked through the
corridors and rode in the lift. It reminded Spen again that
he’d never seen Tony Noble’s kem. Some people, strange to
say, didn’t care for their kem’s company during the working
day—or at all—and Noble seemed to be of that mind.
Stroking Myko’s fluffy tail, Spen couldn’t imagine enduring
the office day without his little friend. Myko, apparently
reading his thoughts, gave his cheek a lick.

“Yes, I was thinking about you, you nuisance. Now

behave and don’t hiss at anyone. Not even him, okay?” Myko
squeaked, but the mischievous glint in his golden eyes didn’t
reassure. Kems did what they wanted in the end. Their
humans could only hold their hands up and say “Wasn’t me,
honest”.

He knocked on Noble’s office door and walked in. A

young man stood as he entered. Spen’s first thought was to
wonder if the school kids on work experience had started
early this year.

“Ah, Spencer, thanks for coming,” Noble said, without

rising. “This is Daniel Walkinshaw, my new PA. Daniel,
Spencer Reardon.”

So, not a kid. Spen shook Daniel’s hand, but still couldn’t

wrap his mind around the idea that this was a man in his
twenties, or so he assumed. Girlish features, large green eyes
and a shy expression all contributed to the disconnect. “Hi,

I’m Spen.”

“Nice to meet you.” Daniel’s grip with a callused hand

was firm enough, and his voice was definitely a man’s. Not
girly at all. His eyes did travel up and down Spen’s body
before he remembered his manners, but Spen was used to
that. After all, when you were six and a half feet tall, you had
to get used to it.

Spen forced himself to stop staring. Myko, who’d been

rather tense until now, suddenly chirped in enquiry, his tail
flicking towards the little grey kem on the back of Daniel’s
chair. “And this is Myko.”

“Oh, hello, Myko. Kani, say hello.” The grey kem jumped

onto Daniel’s arm and ran up to his shoulder, where he
chirped excitedly at Myko above him on Spen’s shoulder.
Spen felt Myko’s need to join the other kem, but he stroked
Myko’s tail and sent a silent wish for him to behave, a wish
Myko granted.

Noble cleared his throat somewhat impatiently. “Take a

seat, Spencer.”

Spen obeyed. Myko hopped down to the floor, where

Kani joined him for a discreet cuddle and licking session.
Daniel shot his kem a tiny smile, then looked down as if
worried that he’d offended someone by doing so. New
employee nerves, Spen diagnosed.

“Daniel, Spencer is our IT manager, and in charge of

implementing the Cross-Channel project in this location

under my supervision. You and he will be working closely
together to ensure that the software is installed and activated
smoothly, and handle the feedback from our people. If it goes
well, we’ll be presenting a report at the national conference
in two months’ time. It’s very important to me that this
project is a success, so I’ll be depending on you two to work
together to make it happen. Spencer, I thought you could
introduce Daniel to your people and give him a more
technical overview. I have, of course, given him the broad
outline of the goals and features of Cross-Channel, but I
thought I’d leave the nuts and bolts to the technicians.”

Spen made himself smile, and stopped himself rolling his

eyes. Managers tended to notice when he made it clear,
silently or otherwise, that he thought they were manifestly
unqualified on a particular subject. Most of the managers in
the company weren’t that tech literate, but since Spen had
heard from a reliable source that when Noble joined the
company, he’d asked his PA at the time how his trackpad
worked, it had been a surprise to learn he’d been selected to
oversee the rolling out of a large and complicated IT project.
Still, he’d apparently recognized his own limitations and
knew when to leave Spen to get on with it. Spen only hoped
this kid he’d hired had some basic computer knowledge,
otherwise he’d be wasting a lot of time bringing two non-
techs up to speed.

“Shall we do that now, Tony?” Daniel asked.

“Yes, yes. Take however long you need. Be back here at

two though, as I want to prepare for that meeting tomorrow.”

“Yes, I will. Kani, come on.” Daniel’s kem ran over and

up to his shoulder—his favourite perch, obviously. Myko did
the same with Spen.

“We’re in the basement,” Spen said as they walked out

together.

“Yes, I know. I read it in the manual.” Daniel flushed.

“Um, I didn’t mean to be rude.”

“You weren’t. You read the manual? Tony gave you time

to do that already?”

“I, um, took it home. I wanted to make sure I knew all the

office procedures and key personnel.”

O...kay. Actual

technical

manuals,

Spen

could

understand. But the office manual? He’d been in the company
two years and he’d never actually read the thing, though he’d
written the section on the IT department. But then he’d been
headhunted so he felt secure in his new job. PAs were easier
to replace—fortunately for Tony Noble, since Daniel was
his third in six months.

He waved his ID card at the sensor. “You’ll need access

too, I guess. I prefer IM and emails but I guess face-to-face
is unavoidable in this kind of thing.” Daniel smiled
hesitantly, but didn’t comment. Spen would have thought
after a week he’d have lost some of his new boy nerves, but
apparently not. “Come on in, we don’t bite. Much.” Daniel’s

eyes widened as if he believed Spen was serious. Good
grief.

“Guys? Meet Daniel, Tony Noble’s new assistant. He’s

going to work with us implementing Cross-Channel.”

A chorus of “Hi, Daniels” broke out and the kid went red

again, although he waved back and said “Hi” in a reasonably
confident tone. His kem squeaked and jumped down to the
floor, having spotted a bunch of new playmates, and all the
office kems, including Myko, rushed over to begin the
traditional love-in. Daniel started to move towards them, but
stopped.

“Sorry—do you mind Kani doing that?”
“Can hardly stop him, can we? Don’t worry about the

kems. Come meet everyone. This is Jyoti, my deputy. That’s
Devi, Luke, Amanda, Wendy, and Joshua. I have a couple of
people off sick so I want to wrap this up pretty quickly this
morning. I can give you all the documentation to read and
you can come back with any questions. Is that okay?”

Daniel nodded and took a seat where Spen indicated.

“Right. Not sure what Tony told you?”

“Um, he said Cross-Channel would make it easier to

keep track of training projects, and trainees to get feedback
and access training materials online. The trainers would
build up a dataset of documents, which any of them could
edit and refine, and become a resource for the entire
company. It sounded like a great idea.”

“It is, but we’re working with a notoriously IT-illiterate

group, not to mention trainees with their own problems. Did
Tony mention our target clients?”

“A bit. You’re working with the long-term unemployed?”
“And people with drug problems, disabilities, language

difficulties—anything and everything. So one,” Spen checked
the points off on his fingers, “we have to get our people
trained. Two, we have to make sure access and security are
as we want them. Three, we have to get the software
installed and configured. Four, we have to train the people
training the trainees. And five, we must keep Tony’s ego
stroked.”

That forced a laugh out of Daniel, though he looked down

quickly, long pale eyelashes brushing reddening cheeks. “He
did mention a few times how important this was to him.”

“Yeah, I bet. But anyway, let me show you a demo. It’s

all accessed in a normal browser. Which one do you
prefer?”

“I don’t really have a preference.”
Spen frowned. “Okay. Which one do you use at home on

your computer?”

“Uh.”
Jyoti caught Spen’s eye and raised her eyebrows. “You

do use the internet at home, don’t you? Which operating
system do you run?”

“Redbird.”

“Redbird?” Spen leaned back in his chair. “Are you

sure? That’s not something you find on most home
computers.”

“No, I know. I was using it in my course at Uni, and I like

it. It’s easy to program in.”

Spen’s brain did a one-eighty. He’d been thinking this kid

was too dumb to even operate a simple web browser, and
now he found he was comfortable programming in a high-
level, highly specialised OS with its own rarefied language
and uses. “So the browser...?”

“Wrote it myself,” Daniel admitted. “I don’t really use

the commercial ones, but I know how to,” he added
earnestly.

“I bet. What did you study at Uni?” Spen asked, mentally

revising his estimate of Daniel’s age again.

“Electrical engineering, but I dropped out last year.”
Something in the set of his jaw as he said that, warned

Spen not to ask why. “Uh, right. Okay, then, you might find
some of what I’m saying a bit simplistic—”

“No, no...I mean, you’re writing web applications and

interfaces for general users in an open environment and I
haven’t done much of that at all. Just treat me like I’m an
idiot.” He gave a deprecating smile as he said that.

“I will if I have to,” Spen agreed, but smiling too. “Okay.

Demo.”

For the next hour and a half, Daniel watched intently,

played with the demonstration site under Spen’s supervision,
and asked a few but pertinent questions. Maybe he didn’t
know much about writing user interfaces, or the database
language they were using, but he knew data, and he
understood the issues of security and access Spen had to
address. Spen gave him the manual, apologising in advance
for the simple-minded writing which he’d pitched at the
level of their IT-phobic employees.

“That’s fine. It’ll be a quick read then.” Daniel’s smile

had become much more open and ready as the morning had
worn on. “I’ll bring it back tomorrow.”

“Don’t read the damn thing at home. Life’s too short.”
Daniel clutched the folder to his chest, and his smile

disappeared. “Yes. Yes, it is. But I can read it on the bus.
Thanks for taking the time. I know you’re busy.”

“Not a problem. I’ll arrange your ID to have access for

this section, and send you an email confirming. There’s a
meeting on Thursday at eleven.”

“Yes, Tony told me. I’ll be there. Thank you.” He bobbed

his head and rushed out of the room, stopping only to scoop
up his kem and pop him up on his shoulder.

As the door closed behind him, Luke came over to

Spen’s desk. “What the hell is someone like that doing
working for a tit like Tony Noball?”

“I have no idea, but I intend to find out. At least we

didn’t end up with a moron as our liaison.” Spen raised his

arms over his head and cracked his spine. Myko took that as
an invitation to hop into his lap for a petting and cuddle,
which Spen delivered without even needing to think about it.
“Right. Who’s going to lunch?”

Chapter 3

Daniel rubbed his forehead, trying to ease the headache

that had been sitting in his frontal lobes all day. He had
redone this presentation three times now, and hoped this time
Tony wouldn’t decide to radically rewrite it, as he had with
the three previous attempts. The presentation was for a key
meeting, and Daniel didn’t begrudge the time spent, but he
worried it was his own incompetence which made the
previous versions so lacklustre. He didn’t want Tony to start
questioning the decision to hire him. Not this soon anyway.

“Got those graphics Tony wanted.” A folder slammed

down in his desk as Linda’s sulky voice penetrated his
attention.

He looked up. “Uh, do you have the digital versions?”
“You mean the original files?” She said it as if he was a

total moron for not using the correct office term. “Couldn’t
find them. They’re lost, apparently.” The look on her face
made Daniel doubt the truth of that, but it also told him it was
a waste of time to argue.

“Okay, thanks.” He made a special effort to smile in as

polite and friendly a manner as he could, but Linda sneered
and flounced off. Effort wasted, clearly. She didn’t like him.
None of the other PAs did. In fact the only people in the
entire office who treated him as something higher in the
evolutionary scale than bacteria were Spen’s team. Daniel
took a guilty pleasure in the frequent visits he had to make to

the IT section, and wondered what he would do when this
rollout was finished and the meetings with Spen and his
people were no longer necessary.

The printed graphics weren’t good enough to use in a

slideshow, so Daniel resigned himself to a couple of hours
trying to recreate them using software designed for idiots.
No lunch for him again. There was a strict “no eating at the
desk” rule, so apart from quick cups of plastic coffee in the
kitchen, he had to manage until he got home in the evening.
He didn’t dare tell Dee. She suspected he ate badly, and he
did. Had done as a student, and now as an office worker. He
just did what he had to do, to get the work done. That was
what his job was. Bring in the income, keep the family going.
There was no one else now to do that.

At half past two he knocked on Tony’s door. “Finished

the redo.”

His boss smiled approvingly. “Terrific. Let me look.”
“It’s on the server. I’ll just call it up—”
“No need. I can come and look on your computer. Let’s

see.”

So Daniel opened the file up again, and Tony leaned over

him, his hand casually on Daniel’s shoulder. Daniel didn’t
find the position comfortable in any sense of the word, but
Tony was a touchy-feely kind of boss, and since Daniel had
zero experience with an employer in this situation, he
realised he would have to adjust. He did his best not to

squirm or indicate in any way that Tony’s hand bothered him,
but he wished Tony wouldn’t wear such sickly cologne.

“Good thing Legal found those graphics.”
“Uh, they only had print outs, so I remade them. Hope

they’re okay.”

Tony looked at him. “They’re wonderful, but I didn’t

realise you’d have to...I mean, those pictures were done ages
ago.”

“They lost the original files, Linda said.”
“Right.” Tony frowned. “Did you have lunch today?”
“Not yet. I wanted to finish—”
“Did you have lunch yesterday?”
Daniel flushed. “Not exactly.”
“Rest of the week?”
“No. There was so much to do.” He realised after he said

it that it sounded like a complaint. “I mean, I’m still getting
used to things so I’m slower—”

Tony held up his hand. “No, this isn’t good enough.”

Daniel’s heart sank. He’d failed already. “I don’t want my
staff burning out, and I certainly don’t want them starving.
Now you go home early, have a good, restful weekend, and I
expect you to take a proper break in the middle of the day.
Employment laws and all that, you know,” he added,
wagging his finger sternly. Kani meeped and patted it with a
paw. Daniel hastily picked his kem off his shoulder and set
him down on the floor. “Close this down, and I’ll see you

Monday.”

“But what if it needs changes?”
“I’ll have to ask someone. It looks fine, Daniel. It’s on

the server, you said.” He squeezed Daniel’s shoulder, and
smiled. “Off you go, and thank you.”

“Uh...you’re welcome. Are you sure?”
“Daniel....”
“Okay. Thank you. See you Monday.”
Tony smiled again and went back to his office. Daniel

did a quick check to make sure he’d left his desk in a tidy
state, that the files for the presentation were clearly marked
and easily locatable, then he scooped up Kani and his jacket,
and headed for the lift. Linda came around the corner, but
pretended not to see him. Suited Daniel—he didn’t want to
have to explain why he was leaving early because he wasn’t
at all sure it didn’t make him look like a lame duck PA. Two
secretaries from Dennis Obi’s team joined him in the lift, but
ignored him. Maybe they could tell he was gay and
disapproved? He had no other explanation to offer himself as
to why he was almost universally despised, and he certainly
wasn’t going to ask. He just had to do the job. That was all
that mattered.

The secretaries got off at the fifth floor, leaving Daniel

and Kani to ride the rest of the way alone. Kani wormed his
way back onto Daniel’s shoulder and licked his face, giving
out quiet little chirps of concern.

“I’m okay,” Daniel said, petting Kani’s tail. “Just tired.

And starving.” Kani chirped louder. “You’re hungry too, I
bet. Sorry, kiddo. You should make more fuss.” Kani
responded by sticking the end of his tail into Daniel’s ear,
making him laugh as the lift doors opened. An array of
bemused and slightly disapproving looks from waiting
passengers greeted the two of them. Kani squeaked and
disappeared, and Daniel scurried away from the lift area as
quickly as he could. He didn’t want a reputation as a lunatic.

Kani reappeared seconds later, just as Daniel spotted

Spen’s unmistakeable figure striding towards them. His heart
gave a queer little lurch, half panic, half relief. Since Spen
was one of his few allies, Daniel was terrified of doing
anything to diminish the goodwill between them, but his
growing crush on this handsome, funny, clever...incredibly
tall...guy made conversations torture. He lived in fear of
opening his mouth and letting some utterly gauche or stupid
comment fall out, which would either let Spen know about
Daniel’s secret feelings, or make him think Daniel was a
total dork. It always took a little while before Spen’s easy
charm let him relax and talk normally.

Spen was dressed as usual in a sharp suit, his slim tie

knotted loosely and letting the hollow of his long neck show,
the crisp whiteness of his shirt setting off his dark skin
nicely. Even in a suit, he looked utterly relaxed. Daniel had
no idea how he managed that. Spen spotted them—or rather

Myko spotted Kani and the two kems running towards each
other gave Spen the tip—and waved. Daniel smiled, but
hoped Spen would be too busy to stop and chat.

No such luck. “Hi, Daniel. Off to late lunch?”
“Uh, no. Going home.”
Spen’s eyebrows lifted. “Are you sick?”
“No, no...just been working through my lunch hours and

Tony didn’t approve. He sent me home.” God, that sounded
awful. “I mean...he thought I’d been working too hard and
wanted me to have a break.”

“Now that’s something I agree with. You don’t want to

burn out. I know all about wanting to impress a new boss,
but I don’t think you have anything to worry about there.
Shame you’re heading off. I was about to give you a call and
ask if you wanted to come along with us to the pub this
evening.”

“Us?” Daniel squeaked.
“The IT lot. No one scary,” he added with a big grin. He

had a lovely smile, Daniel thought. “You still could come
along....”

Daniel was tempted because he hadn’t had an evening out

since...well, not since Uni...but put the temptation aside. “I
can’t, sorry. I should get home. There’s stuff to do.”

“Oh, okay.” Spen sounded truly regretful. “Next week,

maybe.”

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

“See you next week. Seriously, you shouldn’t stress so

much. You’re good. You have no idea how much easier
having you to liaise with has made my job.”

Daniel’s face heated up with embarrassed pleasure.

“Uh...thanks. I try.”

“You do. Have a good weekend...and look after yourself,

okay?”

The warm concern in Spen’s voice and his kind brown

eyes made Daniel want to cry. “I will,” he managed to say.
“You too. Kani, come on.”

Kani and Myko gave each other one last nuzzle of

affection, then Kani bounded over and up Daniel’s body onto
his shoulder. He chirped at Spen, and Spen reached over to
pat Kani’s fuzzy head. “You look after our boy, squirt. See
you both later.”

Myko climbed his human’s leg and Spen strode off, the

only man in the whole company who could make a suit look
cool, an imposing sight never likely to be lost in the crowds.
Daniel watched until he disappeared around a corner, then
sighed. “We better go, Kani. Time to feed both of us.”

Kani squeaked in delight, and his easy joy put a reluctant

grin on Daniel’s face. A kem’s life was so damn simple.

~~~~~~~~

Spen had been looking forward to talking to Daniel

outside the office, but it was a lot to ask, expecting him to
hang around for hours just to have a pint. Spen couldn’t

begrudge him an early start to the weekend. Strange that it
was Tony suggesting it, since the guy had a rep for asking a
lot of overtime from his assistants and pushing them hard.
Maybe he didn’t want to scare the kid off. If Spen had
someone on his team as bright and helpful as Daniel, he’d do
almost anything to retain them. Damn shame Daniel didn’t
have a formal qualification, or Spen would poach him
without a twinge of conscience.

Friday afternoons were for winding down everywhere

but in IT, which all too often had to deal with a last minute
panic by one or other of the managers over projects for the
next week, new employees, and equipment failures. But at
six, Spen stood and whistled. “Okay, boys and girls. Close it
down, lock it up, and get your party on.”

“My man Spen,” Luke called approvingly, already

logging out and switching off non-essential equipment.

Ten minutes later they were in their favourite local pub,

Spen making the first round of orders as was traditional.
Bearing a pint of his favourite real ale, he nabbed prime
position in the corner, while his people spread around and
took greedy slurps of liquid refreshment. An almost
choreographed sigh, and then a ripple as everyone relaxed.
“Fuck, this week sucked,” Jyoti said with a groan. Her kem
nuzzled her cheek in sympathy.

“Just like every other week,” Luke said. “Hey, I heard a

bit of gossip about our boy Daniel. Seems HR weren’t at all

happy about recruiting him, and the prevailing wisdom is that
he’ll be gone before his probation is up.”

Spen frowned, not liking to encourage this kind of thing,

but Jyoti had already seized on the morsel. “Why would HR
object? He’s bright, really sharp.”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t have a degree, and there were a

few noses out of joint since they had so many internal
candidates. Noball really pushed for him. Looked a bit
funny, apparently.”

“Managers do that all the time,” Spen said. “I pushed for

you.” He gave his tech a quelling look. “Nothing strange
about that.”

“No, of course not.” Jyoti took the hint, and turned the

conversation to suggestions being floated for team building
outings. Luke didn’t bring Daniel up again, to Spen’s relief.

But Luke and Spen had to wait at the same bus stop for

their ride home, and despite Spen’s distaste for the subject,
Luke had something on his mind that he had to express. “It
isn’t just Daniel’s recruitment that’s weird, you know.”

“I don’t think this is a good—”
“No, wait, Spen. I like Daniel, that’s why I want to tell

you. You know how we were all told that Jan left for a better
job and that’s why he resigned in such a hurry? Well, Alison
in Logistics said she ran into him two weeks ago, and he’s
unemployed. As in, still unemployed. He didn’t have a job to
go to—he just left without giving notice. Alison’s since

found out that HR knew about it but were happy to spread the
fake story.”

“Maybe he had personal reasons. Wasn’t his mum sick?”
“Yeah. She died a couple of weeks before Jan left.

Alison said he was happy to talk about his mum, but
clammed up tight when she mentioned Noble. There’s
something funny about Noble, Spen. Two males PAs in a
row, which is unusual in itself, lasting less than three months
each? And now a new one he’s recruited against everyone’s
advice?”

“Sorry, I’m still not seeing why this is a worry. Noball is

an egotistical pain in the arse, so maybe people just don’t
like working for him.”

Luke folded his arms and looked seriously at Spen. “Lots

of our managers are pains in the arse, and their people stick
at it for years. I reckon it has to be something else.”

“Like?”
“Work it out. Jan was young, pretty and gay. Daniel is

young and pretty, and if he’s not gay, I’m a baboon.”

“Noble’s married with kids.”
“Yeah. Perfect cover.”
“So why does he still have a job? Come on, Luke. You

think the company would keep him on if this was true?”

Luke shrugged. “Maybe Jan didn’t want the hassle. Or

maybe the company paid him off. Why would they lie about
him? They wouldn’t want word to get out that Noble’s

sexually harassing his staff. The work we do, the clients we
have? Can’t afford the publicity.”

“Sounds like bollocks to me. You don’t have any proof of

this. You really don’t want to spread this around.”

“I won’t, but I wanted to tell you. The knives are out for

this kid, at least among the admin assistants, and that’s no
rumour. Someone needs to keep an eye on him. He likes you.
We like him. I don’t want him to lose his job.”

“You’re making this very personal. And that’s your bus.”
“Shit, yeah.” Luke stuck his hand out to hail it, and the

bus pulled into the stop. “Look him up on the net and you’ll
see why.”

“What?”
“On the net. You’ll find him. See you Monday.”
Spen waved distractedly as the bus pulled off. His own

bus arrived a minute later, and he settled down in his seat,
disturbed by Luke’s odd news and his strange obsession with
Daniel’s safety. If true, it certainly was worrying, but Luke
implied that it was more than Daniel’s youth and
inexperience that might make him vulnerable.

Annoyed at himself for giving into the urge, he pulled out

his smartphone and typed in “Daniel Walkinshaw”. There
were too many results to make sense of, so he just searched
for images. The very first page of results showed their
Daniel, pictures of him with his family, some showing him
holding some kind of prize or certificate. Spen clicked

through and discovered that Daniel had won prizes at his
secondary school for Chemistry and Computing, and a part-
scholarship for his tuition fees. So he was bright. This
wasn’t in dispute.

Puzzled as to why Luke thought this was relevant, Spen

went back to the search results, and clicked on one of the
pictures of a somewhat younger Daniel with a brother and
sister and his parents. Spen assumed it was to do with his
academic achievements. He couldn’t have been more wrong.

This was what Luke had been talking about. Daniel’s

parents had died last year in a freak accident involving a
collapsing crane and a horrifyingly large block of concrete,
leaving Daniel and his siblings orphaned. There were dozens
of reports focussing on the misfortune of the people killed
and what had caused the accident, and a certain amount of
attention to the fate of the three children. But with Daniel
being an adult, and with living grandparents, the assumption
seemed to be that the two younger kids would manage. The
press had moved on, though a coronial enquiry had been held
just three months ago, deeming the deaths to be unlawful, and
a recent news report said the company responsible for the
crane’s maintenance was to be prosecuted for manslaughter.

So that explained the interrupted degree, which was a

damn shame. But it also explained why someone with his
obvious technical talent was stuck in an office working for
Tony Noble. Did it also explain why Noble had been so

eager to hire him? Young, pretty...and responsible for an
orphaned brother and sister. Gay or not, Daniel had flashing
signs all over him saying “prey”. The question was, was
Noble a predator or was that accusation purely based on the
office gossip machine, never particularly charitable or
accurate?

Myko put his paw on Daniel’s picture. “What do you

think, eh? Worried too?” Myko looked up at Spen and it
really did look like he was concerned, especially when he
patted the photo again and gave a sad little chirp. But maybe
Myko was only reacting to Spen’s mood. Hard to know, with
kems.

He nearly missed his stop, he was so absorbed in his

thoughts, and only Myko nipping his ear saved him from a
long walk back. Even when he got back to the house, he
couldn’t stop thinking about it. His mum came out as he
rummaged through the fridge.

“Hello, love. Had a nice time?” Myko squeaked in glee

and jumped from Spen’s shoulder to his mother’s, so she had
Vira, her kem, on one side of her head, and Myko on the
other. Myko spent near as much time on his mum’s shoulder
as Spen’s when he was home.

“Same as usual. How was school?”
“Same as usual.” She grinned. “Let’s just say that I’m

glad retirement is only three years away.”

“You’d be bored.”

“I’d love a chance to be bored. There’s a couple of

chops if you want them.”

“No, thanks. I’ll just make a cheese sandwich.”
“I was just going to have a cup of tea. Want one?”
“Oh, thanks. Where’s Dad?”
“Asleep in front of the telly. I thought I’d wake him up

when I was off to bed.”

Spen nodded. His dad was often exhausted by the end of

the week. He worked for the city as an engineer, and budget
cuts meant there was always more work than there were
people to do it.

His mum made the tea while Spen made his sandwich,

and they sat together in the kitchen while he ate. “Mum, what
do you know about orphaned kids? Do they get much help?”

“Depends on their age. If they’re under sixteen, then they

go into foster care.”

“What if one of them is an adult?”
“Then I think the government only steps in if there’s a

problem. Thinking of someone in particular?”

“Sort of. I don’t really know the full story.” Nor did he

know if Daniel was really the only adult looking after his
siblings. Spen knew very little about his situation, and
Daniel was very close-mouthed about it. Which was a hint, if
Spen needed one, that it was none of his business.

“Something bothering you, Spencer?”
He shook himself. “No, not really. Someone at work was

talking about a new employee, and got me thinking.”

“Someone in trouble?”
“Not that I know of. Not yet.”
His mother, no fool, peered at him. “But you’re

worried.”

“I don’t know if I need to be. I’ll just keep an eye on

things.”

She patted his hand. “You do that, love. Can’t do any

harm to watch out for someone who might need help.” She
yawned. “Oh heavens. I think I better wake your father and
go to bed. See you in the morning.”

She lifted Myko off her shoulder and set him down on the

table, then bent over and kissed Spen. “You have a good
heart, Spencer. It’ll always steer you right.”

“Thanks, Mum. Sleep well.”
He was tired too, and should really find his own bed, but

he couldn’t stop thinking about Daniel. About what it would
be like to lose his parents so young, so suddenly. And about
Daniel and Tony Noble, and what, if anything, was behind
the departure of Noball’s previous PA.

Spen was no innocent and had seen a few things he

couldn’t even tell his mother about, open-minded as she was.
Even so, he found it hard to get his head around the idea that
a self-important idiot like Tony Noble—someone in the
same company as Spen, someone he saw on an almost daily
basis—would cold-bloodedly target an orphaned young man

just to get his rocks off. Yet worse things happened every
day, and all too often by someone described by neighbours
and friends as “such a lovely quiet person”.

On the other hand, Luke did occasionally get worked up

about things which turned out to have no basis at all. Like the
time he became convinced the new office drinking water
bottles leached cancer-causing chemicals into the water, and
tried to organise a petition to get the company to change
suppliers again. Jyoti finally got in touch with the lab that did
the quality control testing and asked them to email Luke
directly to allay his fears, at which point he gave up his
campaign, and Spen could stop worrying about how he’d
replace an important team member who’d been fired for
stupidity. Luke was sincerely worried about Daniel, but that
didn’t mean there was anything to worry about.

Spen finished his cup of tea, then washed up the plate and

other things. He couldn’t do any more about this without
more information, and he couldn’t get that until next week, so
there was no point in fretting over it.

“Maybe I should get you to talk to Kani and ask him

about it,” he said to Myko. His kem tipped his head and
appeared to be seriously considering the idea, and not for the
first time, Spen wondered exactly how much kems
understood about human affairs. “We can both keep an eye
on him, okay?”

Myko chirped and lifted up a paw. Spen shook it, smiling

at his kem’s strange gesture. “Right, off to bed for the two of
us. And no waking me up at dawn, you hear?”

Myko’s wide-eyed “Who, me?” expression was entirely

fake, Spen knew from experience. But a very convincing
fake.

Chapter 4

A weekend’s reflection on the subject of Daniel and his

boss didn’t bring any great enlightenment. If Spen could have
talked to his mother about it, it might have helped, but he
didn’t like the idea of spreading rumours any further than
Luke had already done, and he felt uneasy about making
assumptions about Daniel’s home situation.

The obvious thing would have been to talk to Daniel

himself, but that was surprisingly difficult to arrange
gracefully without revealing that Spen already knew more
than he really should do. Daniel clearly liked Spen’s team,
but he was rather hesitant and overawed by Spen himself,
though he tended to relax once he’d been in the section for a
few minutes. There was just no opening where Spen could
casually say, “So, I hear you’re an orphan”, or “You know
your boss? We think he might be a bit of a creeper”. How
could you say that to anyone?

So all he could do was wait, be friendly, watch Daniel—

which wasn’t a hardship, because the kid was ridiculously
cute—and hope like hell Luke was wrong. Spen didn’t even
have much chance to keep an eye on him the next week, as he
only saw Daniel twice, and that only in passing. Daniel
looked harried and worried, but he nearly always did. One
thing Luke had definitely pegged right was the hostility
towards him. Spen saw the looks and noticed the comments
now he was alert to them. He overheard two secretaries at

the photocopier sneering about Noble’s “hopeless assistant”.
Infuriating, when Spen knew how far from the truth it was,
but jumping down these bitchy women’s throats wasn’t likely
to improve Daniel’s reputation. Spen didn’t know there was
much he could do, since Daniel didn’t work for him. Yet. He
had some vague ideas about poaching Daniel for his own
team, but as yet, they hadn’t resolved into something solid he
could put to upper management. He needed more time to
observe Daniel and his skills, and it was a political battle
that would need careful planning.

He could at least chase Daniel up for the Friday pub

outing. One of the perks of being the manager of a team in a
secure area was access to real-time security logs which
tracked the movement of individuals’ passes through RFID
checkpoints. This meant he could check if anyone had come
into the IT section behind an authorised individual. So far he
never had to worry about it, but the access was occasionally
useful to locate members of his team who’d wandered off,
without the hassle of calling and checking on them. Now it
came in handy to let him know where Daniel was taking his
lunch break—in the Legal and Donor Management staff
kitchen.

Spen took the lift to the fifth floor, and found his quarry.

“Hey.”

Daniel looked up in shock, nearly spilling his tea. “S-

Spen. What are you doing here?” Kani, lying curled up on the

table, uncoiled and squeaked. Myko jumped down for a
cuddle.

“Looking for you. Calm down. You’re not in trouble.”

Spen swung into the chair opposite him. “How’s things?”

“Fine. Busy. Did you want something? I thought the

project was in client testing.”

“Yeah, it is. I just wanted to ask you to come along

tonight. It’s Friday.” At Daniel’s confused look, he added,
“Pub night.”

“Oh. I’m sorry, I can’t.” He shot a glance in the direction

of his office. “I’ve been working late most of this week and I
have to get home on time tonight. It’s not fair.”

“Fair on...?”
Daniel flushed. “My sister. She’s looking after my little

brother.”

“Parents away?” Spen felt like a bastard for pretending

he didn’t know, and Myko’s glance at his words only
increased his guilty feelings.

“No. Um, there’s just the three of us. My sister’s taken on

so much work since I started here and she’s studying for her
exams. I have to get home tonight.”

“I understand. Don’t stress it. Does, uh, Tony know about

your home situation?”

Daniel looked down at his sandwich. “Yes,” he

mumbled. “But there’s a big meeting of donors coming up
and there’s a lot to do.”

“Right. You realise that this company has a very good

reputation for supporting staff with family commitments,
don’t you?” Daniel looked up, but his glum expression didn’t
change. “Just saying that Tony should take them into
account.”

“I’m still on probation. There are plenty of people with

kids and commitments here and they don’t ask for special
treatment.”

“Yes, but—”
“Spen, please? I’m fine.” He stood and smiled, but there

was no happiness behind it. “Tony’s a good boss. I want to
do a good job. I’ll try and make it to the pub next week,
okay?”

“I’ll remind you. Daniel...if you....”
“What?”
“You know...need advice about how the place works.

You can ask me. Or Jyoti. Any of us.”

The smile was less tense this time. “Thanks. I’m fine,

really. I have to go. You should see my desk.”

“If you can see your desk, then you’re one ahead of me.”
Daniel gave a little chuckle. “Uh, yeah, see what you

mean. Thanks for the invitation. I wish I could...you
understand.”

“I do. Catch you around.”
Daniel dumped the dregs of his tea and picked up his

plastic lunch container. Kani climbed up on his shoulder,

Daniel gave Spen one last shy smile, then disappeared into
the corridor.

Myko ran after them. “Myko, no.”
His kem turned to look, chirping a little. “No, squirt. He

has to work.”

Still Myko hesitated, so Spen went over and picked him

up, nuzzling the top of Myko’s head with his chin. “Don’t
worry. I’ll keep an eye on him, okay?”

Myko trilled, affectionately wrapping his tail around

Spen’s wrist. His kem’s trust and approval were lovely, but
Spen wasn’t at all sure he knew what was going on here.
One minute Noble was worried Daniel was burning out, next
minute he had him working overtime on multiple nights. All
the managers used overtime when they had big meetings and
projects, so it wasn’t strange of Noble to do that. Just...the
inconsistency.

Maybe Spen was making something out of nothing, like

Luke was prone to doing. He really was busy and if he
wanted to get away on time himself, he should shift his butt.
He wished Daniel could come along tonight. It would be
good for him—but only if he wasn’t stressing about home.
Still, now the subject had been broached, Spen could pry a
little more out of the kid, see if he could do anything.

He smiled ruefully. Now he was doing it—making it

personal, like Luke. He couldn’t help it. Daniel had the touch
of the lost puppy about him, yet he seemed determined to do

it all by himself. Spen had worked with young people for too
long not to be affected by that.

Right now, Daniel was okay. Spen couldn’t do anything

for him until he asked for help, which he might never do.

~~~~~~~~

“Mr Godwin? I’m Mr Noble’s assistant.”
The pleasant-faced, sharply suited young man in the foyer

stood and smiled at Daniel. “Julian, please. And you’re...?”

“Daniel. Daniel Walkinshaw.”
Julian held out his hand. “Nice to meet you, Daniel. This

is Pyon,” he said. The black kem on his shoulder squeaked at
the sound of his name.

“This is Kani. Say hello, Kani.” Daniel’s kem jumped

across from his shoulder onto Julian’s. Daniel reached out
for him. “Gosh, I’m sorry—”

“Don’t apologise. Pyon loves company, don’t you?” Pyon

chirped and changed shoulders so he could perch
precariously and cuddle Kani. Julian simply adjusted his
stance to accommodate the lop-sided load. Daniel tried not
to look as amazed as he felt. None of their other clients had
been this relaxed. “So, shall we go meet your boss?”

“This way.”
Still bearing both kems, Julian followed Daniel to the

lifts. “You’re new, aren’t you?” he said as they waited. “I
think when Leo...that’s my boss, Leo Underwood...first got
me to look into this, someone called Jan was working for

Tony.”

“Yes, he left. I’ve been here two months. Still learning

the ropes.” Though the thrilling question was, would he ever
finish learning them?

“I’m sure you’re doing fine.” They stepped into the empty

elevator and Daniel pressed the button. “Kani’s a sweet little
fellow, isn’t he?” Julian gave Kani a pat and earned an
earlick.

“Is he bothering you? I can—”
“Oh, please don’t. He’s keeping Pyon out of mischief.”

Pyon looked up and gave his human an indignant squeak.
Julian laughed and stroked the swaying black tail. “Just
teasing, brat. Here we are.”

Daniel liked Julian, but he wasn’t the client—his boss

was. Maybe the boss was a lot less pleasant, if he couldn’t
even bother to come along and see where his money might be
going. Daniel wondered if Julian liked his job and his boss,
or if he wished he could be doing something completely
different, like Daniel did, but couldn’t. At least not now.

Daniel knocked at Tony’s door. “Mr Noble? Julian

Godwin for you.”

Tony stood, smiling broadly. “Oh, Julian, please do come

in. Nice to meet you finally.” They shook hands. “Tea?
Coffee? Water?”

“Green tea would be nice if you have it.”
“Daniel, would you?”

Daniel left to fetch the tea. Rather to his surprise, Kani

stayed put, grooming a quietly trilling Pyon as if his life
depended on it. Nice for him to have someone new to play
with. Kani didn’t like the office much, except when they
visited IT. None of the office kems seemed inclined to play
with him, though they weren’t as unfriendly as their humans
were to Daniel. If it were possible, Daniel would have left
Kani at the house, but to be honest, without Kani’s company
and the occasional visits to Spen’s lair, Daniel would have
gone a little crazy from loneliness by now.

When he returned, Pyon and Kani had moved to the floor

and were tumbling around in a play fight. The sides of
Tony’s mouth were drawn down disapprovingly as he
glanced at the kems. Daniel could have picked Kani up and
asked him to behave, but Julian showed no signs of being
bothered, listening with apparent attentiveness to Tony’s
spiel about the company’s current projects.

Daniel set the tea down on front of Julian on Tony’s desk

and was about to leave when Tony broke off. “Ah, Daniel,
would you stay please? I’d like you to liaise with Julian over
Mr Underwood’s participation.”

“Possible participation,” Julian said. “Leo’s very keen to

invest in young people and start-up business, but he hasn’t
made a decision. We’re looking into several options.”

“Yes, of course. Forgive the presumption. Sit down,

Daniel, please.”

Daniel obeyed, and immediately found himself with a

lapful of kems. He gave them both scritches between the ears
and Pyon trilled in delight. “He likes that, keep it up,” Julian
stage-whispered. Daniel grinned and did so.

Tony cleared his throat. “As I was saying, Julian, if Mr

Underwood chose to work with our company, he would have
the assurance of an organisation established over twenty
years ago, with a national presence and a glowing
international reputation. I personally bring ten years of
investment experience, and I’ve won a number of awards for
my achievements.” He swept his hand towards the wall
where his certificates and trophies were displayed. Daniel
knew them all by heart as he had to dust them every week.
“Some of our so-called competitors haven’t been in business
for more than three years.”

“No, but I find it a bit strange that a company that

specialises in startups would be so rude about other
startups.” Julian smiled as he said it, but Tony’s expression
grew even more strained. “Don’t worry. I’ll present all
you’ve said to Leo and your proposal will receive fair
consideration. If Leo wasn’t interested, I wouldn’t be here
today.”

Daniel almost sighed in relief. Losing Leo Underwood’s

investment would be a slap in the face for Tony, as he’d
been boasting about hooking “the big one” ever since Julian
had arranged the appointment.

“I appreciate that. If there’s any more information you

need, or assistance, I or Daniel will be happy to provide it,
any time at all. Daniel.”

Daniel jerked up, wondering why Tony had said his name

in that way, then realised Kani and Pyon had jumped up on
Tony’s desk. Julian hadn’t made a move to stop his kem, so
Daniel didn’t know what he should do. “Kani,” he said
quietly. “Come down.”

His kem ignored him. Pyon batted at Tony’s kinetic

sculpture, making the balls swing back and forth. Kani
sniffed at them, and then wandered off, apparently
uninterested in them.

“Daniel,” Tony said tightly. “Would you mind?”
“Kani, please?” He reached out for his kem, but Kani

dodged his hand, scampering across the desk—and straight
for the teacup. Before Julian could save it or Daniel catch
his errant kem, Kani hit the cup, sending it flying across the
desk.

Tony lifted his laptop out of the way of the slowly

spreading tea. “Daniel!” His face was bright red with anger.

Daniel made a grab for Kani and finally caught him.

“Gosh, I’m sorry, let me—”

“Look, I think I should go. Pyon,” Julian said, calmly

picking up his kem. “I’ll show myself out.”

“No, no. Daniel, please show Julian out while I’ll clean

this up.” Tony picked up a bundle of papers and shook them.

Fortunately the cup was nearly empty but it was still a mess.

Daniel made a run for it before Tony changed his mind.

Julian appeared utterly unconcerned as Daniel joined him in
the corridor. “I’m so sorry,” Daniel said. “Kani—”

Julian smiled and shook his head. “It’s okay, honestly.

You wouldn’t know it to look at him now, but Pyon could be
a right little terror when he wanted to be. Still can, can’t
you,” he added, nuzzling his kem’s head.

“But Kani’s usually so well-behaved. It’s the first time

he’s ever done something like this.”

Julian frowned. “Really?”
“I swear. He’s usually so quiet and good.” Kani

squeaked, and despite the flipflops Daniel’s stomach was
doing over what Tony would say when he came back, he
petted his kem reassuringly. After all, he’d only been
playing.

“Huh.” Julian grew rather thoughtful. Daniel didn’t know

how to take this.

They rode down the elevator in silence, but when they

arrived at the ground floor Daniel felt he had to try and put
this right. “Look, Julian...you won’t let this influence your
decision over investing, will you?”

“Don’t be silly. Anyway, it’s not my decision. Leo

doesn’t let mischievous kems decide how he spends his
money.” Julian reached out and petted Kani. “He’s lovely.
Don’t fret. I’m more worried about you and your boss.”

Daniel tried to smile, but he couldn’t make it genuine. “I

guess he’ll be cranky. He’s...um...not a big fan of kems.”

“Really? What a stupid man.” Daniel gulped. “Look,

don’t worry, okay? Now, before you go, I have a favour to
ask. Can you take me to Spencer Reardon’s office? He’s
expecting me.”

Daniel’s anxiety express derailed. “You know Spen?”
“Oh yeah. We go way back. I can ask someone else if—”
“No, no, it’s fine. It’s in the basement. This way.”

Chapter 5

“Hey, Beanie.”
Spen looked up and grinned at Julian, with Daniel

hovering behind him. “Come in here, you ratbag. Where the
hell have you been? That husband of yours keeping you
locked in a cupboard?”

Daniel’s eyebrows rose in surprise at the mention of a

husband, but Julian’s smile only broadened. “Not the
cupboard, Beanpole. Anyway, what’s wrong with you? Did
your phone break at the wedding or something?”

Spen held up his hands in surrender. “Okay, point taken.

You’re looking fantastic. Nice suit.” Pyon had draped
himself over Julian’s right shoulder like a scarf. The little
guy looked as sleek and happy as Spen had ever seen him.

“Birthday present from Leo. Er...sorry, Daniel. Don’t

mean to hold you up.”

“That’s okay,” Daniel said, misery clear in his voice.

What had happened, Spen wondered. “You’re close
friends?”

“Since Uni,” Spen confirmed. “Haven’t seen him since he

got married to Mr Gorgeous, though.”

“That’s Mr Sexy and Gorgeous, thank you,” Julian

purred. Spen couldn’t get over how much Julian had changed
since university, or the luck of him hooking a fantastically
good-looking, rich guy who adored Julian as much as Julian
adored him. “You’ve got Rob, so you can’t talk.”

“Er, no. Not any more. Not since not long after I saw you

last, actually. That’s why I wasn’t in touch.”

Jyoti was the only other person in the section just then,

and though she already knew about Spen’s break up with his
boyfriend, she still winced in sympathy. Daniel’s eyes went
wide. Had he not realised Spen was gay? Did he have a
problem with that? Spen guessed he’d find out soon enough.

“Oh man, I’m sorry. I had no idea.” Julian’s brown eyes

were full of sympathy. “I’d have called....”

“Don’t stress, Jules. It wasn’t horrific. We just decided

we wanted different things from life. Are you ready for
lunch? You’re a little earlier than I was expecting.”

Julian grimaced and behind him, Daniel made a face.

“Uh, yeah. Pyon incited Daniel’s kem to riot and there was a
small accident with a teacup and Tony’s desk. Time for me
to run away. Maybe we should hide Daniel down here until
his boss calms down.”

“No, no...I should get back actually. Don’t want to make

it worse. It was nice to meet you, Julian.”

“You’d be welcome—” Spen started to say, but Daniel

shook his head.

“No, you two need time to catch up. Thank you, though.

Uh...bye.”

Daniel left before Spen could think up an argument why

he should stay. He shrugged. “Oh well. Come on, Jules.
Jyoti?”

“Got the conn, cap’n.”
“Good woman.”

~~~~~~~~

Daniel was practically puking with stress by the time he

knocked on Tony’s office door. “Come in,” Tony said.

“Uh, Tony, look, I’m really so sorry about—”
“Just have a seat, Daniel. Close the door.”
Oh god, this was serious. He was about to be sacked, he

knew it. “Can I just—”

“No, hold on. I understand the...situation...with your kem

wasn’t your fault. You’re not in trouble, so please relax.”
Tony smiled, and Daniel’s stomach unclenched a little in
relief. “However, as you notice, I don’t allow my kem to
come out at work because there’s always the risk of such
situations. It’s not the first time one of them has caused
unwelcome disruption.”

“Kani’s normally so good.”
“I’m sure. But from now on, I want you to keep him out of

sight while at work.”

Kani squeaked in alarm, and Daniel patted his tail.

“Shhh, it’s okay. Go inside, Kani.”

With a miserable chirp, Kani obeyed. Daniel already felt

colder. “Thank you,” Tony said. “You’re doing very well. If
you continue to impress, there won’t be any problem about
your passing your probation.”

“Thanks. I want to do well.”

“I’m sure. Your willingness to learn and try is an asset.

So let’s not talk about this again. Oh, the quarterly figures
from Head Office will be in after five, so I’ll need that
presentation done tonight for the meeting Thursday.”

“Tonight?” It was Alex’s birthday. Daniel had promised

faithfully to be home on time, and he’d thought he was safe.
The figures weren’t supposed to be coming in until
tomorrow. “Um, it’s just....”

Tony looked at him over his reading glasses. “You do

realise this is a critical meeting, Daniel. I really don’t want
you to let me down.”

Daniel nodded, heart sinking. “I won’t. I just need to call

home.”

Tony shuffled some papers on his desk, his mind clearly

on the next task. “Whatever you need. Could you find the
Warbell file and bring it in?”

Daniel got up to fetch it from his desk. Alex would never

forgive him. Daniel would never forgive himself. But he
didn’t dare risk making Tony angry over this, and especially
not when he’d overlooked what was probably a sacking
offence. Alex would understand...eventually.

~~~~~~~~

Julian swallowed the chip he’d been eating. “So, tell me

about the cute redhead who lights up like a Christmas tree
when I say your name.”

“He does not. That’s Daniel, our enigma. Genius level

IQ, a year short of getting his bachelor’s degree, then his
parents were killed in an accident.”

“God, really? The poor kid.”
Spen remembered then that Julian’s husband, Zachary,

had also been orphaned. “Yeah. Left looking after two
younger siblings, I think. I’m not exactly sure what his home
situation is. Kid doesn’t talk about it.”

“Whatever it is, he’s miserable. And I don’t like his

boss.”

“I don’t like his boss either, but he’s supposed to be good

at massaging clients. Didn’t work on you? Maybe because
you’re not the real money man?”

“Oh, he did his best, but he’s patronising, and he doesn’t

like kems. Zachary would write him off for that alone.”

“It’s not a good sign, no.” Spen patted Myko, curled up

asleep in his lap, his tail coiled around Pyon’s foot, as
Julian’s kem lay on the seat between the two humans.
“Daniel’s great at the job, but the job’s bad for him. I don’t
know what to do.”

Julian grinned as he picked up a bit of lettuce. “You’re

already making him a rescue project. I recognise the
symptoms.”

“Hah, you’ve known him all of an hour and you’re taking

an interest too. He just has that effect on people. Actually,
Julian...there’s something else I want your advice on. About
Noble and his past PAs....”

~~~~~~~~

Spen returned from lunch with Julian considerably more

sombre and thoughtful than when he’d left. Julian understood
his concern, and certainly didn’t think he was overreacting.
He was adamant that he wanted to help—Daniel’s situation
and his husband’s being so similar, he felt instinctively
protective, he said—so Spen had told him what he knew.
Julian said he would check some things out, and ask
Zachary’s advice, as well as that of his boss, Leo
Underwood. Spen thought well of both men, and thought it
couldn’t hurt.

But now he wished he hadn’t deterred Luke from sniffing

around, because while Spen was friendly with a lot of the
staff, he had never encouraged gossip or participated in it.
Unfortunately, without actual facts or access to private HR
files, gossip was all he had to go on.

Well, almost all. Security logs showed that Daniel was

still working overtime at least three nights a week. Spen
decided that he could do something about that at least. He
called his mum and told her he’d probably be late home, then
settled down to work on some non-urgent reports that he’d
been avoiding. He’d set up an alarm to let him know if
Daniel left the building. Five o’clock passed. Six o’clock
passed, and the alarm didn’t trigger. At seven, Spen checked
the logs, then stood. Daniel still hadn’t left. Time to carry out
a little intervention, but first, he had to check there was any

need for it.

He strolled up to the security desk on the ground floor.

“Hey, Bob, how’s it going?”

Bob grinned, and ran his hand over his short grey curls.

“Slow, man, slow. You’re here late. Someone blow up their
computer again?”

“Not tonight. At least, not that I know of.” Spen crossed

his fingers exaggeratedly, and Bob laughed. “Can you do me
a favour? I’ve got a report for Tony Noble, and I think he’s
still in his office. Do you know if he is?”

Bob was used to Spen occasionally asking him to find

someone in the building—someone he was chasing to talk to,
or a team member, so he showed no surprise at this request.
He fiddled with the controls at his console, then leaned back.
“Yeah, he’s in. That kid of his is there too. The ginger ninja.”

Spen smiled at the description, but what he saw as he

casually glanced at the monitor Bob indicated, was anything
but amusing. Noble and Daniel were at Daniel’s desk.
Daniel was seated, Noble leaning over Daniel in a way that
would have got Spen slapped if he did it to a female
employee—or even a male one. That was too damn close,
and no way was it normal for an office interaction. Myko
made a worried little noise when he saw Daniel. Spen kept a
gentle hand on him to make sure he didn’t jump down for a
closer look.

“Thanks, Bob. I’ll just pop up and drop these off.” He

waved the folder of reports he’d brought up as cover. “Do
you keep those recordings? I can’t remember what they said
when they installed them.”

“Yeah. Have to, in case we have to call the police in.

Didn’t used to, but now it’s all on some hard disk
somewhere. I think they copy it off and store it. Don’t know
the details. That’s your area, not mine.”

“Only when they break, man. So don’t go breaking it.

Catch you around.”

Bob waved him off in a friendly fashion, hopefully

unaware of Spen’s real purpose. He’d already picked up the
newspaper he’d been reading when Spen interrupted, so
Spen hoped he wouldn’t pay any attention to the monitors
unless an alarm went off. Spen had no intention of doing
anything to warrant an alarm, but the more discreetly this
was handled, the better it would be for all concerned.

There was no one about on the fifth floor that he could

see, and all was quiet. The door to Daniel’s office was shut,
but Spen didn’t knock. After all, he wasn’t supposed to know
Daniel was there. He threw the door open, making the two
men at the desk straighten up in shock. The reactions were
tellingly different. Daniel was simply surprised, but Noble
was angry too...and a little afraid?

Spen played it casual. “Oh, hi, Daniel. Wasn’t expecting

you to be here. Just had some reports for Tony, and thought
I’d drop them off before I went home.”

Noble snatched the folder from him. “Couldn’t this have

waited, Spencer? Why on earth would you think I was
around at this time of night?” He backed further away from
Daniel, and Spen didn’t think he imagined the relaxation in
Daniel’s features as he did so. Relaxation—and relief too.

“Oh, I checked at Security.” Spen pointed casually up at

the corner of the office’s ceiling. “The new system. The in-
office cameras. Don’t you remember? Head Office
authorised them after we had those laptop thefts.”

“Ah, yes, of course.” Noble straightened up and cleared

his throat. “Right. Fine. Thank you. Daniel, I think we’re
finished here. You should get on home.”

“Thanks, Tony. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Spen had never

seen anyone logoff that fast before, and Daniel had picked up
his coat and shot out of the office before Spen had a chance
to offer to walk him out.

Noble made a show of collecting papers from the desk,

ignoring his departing PA and Spen. His lips thinned as he
looked up and realised Spen was still there. “Anything else,
Spencer?”

Spen pretended he couldn’t hear the chill in Noble’s

tone. “No. I should get home too. Don’t believe in overtime
as a rule. Leads to burnout.”

“Good night then. Don’t let me hold you up.”
Spen grinned to himself as he made his way to the

elevator, while Myko trilled in approval. Message delivered

and point made, he hoped.

~~~~~~~~

Relieved beyond words at his unexpected early escape—

and thanking Spen for prompting it, though it had been a
rather odd thing to do—Daniel sprang for a taxi in the hope
of getting back home even faster. Kani, allowed out once
more, perched on his lap and gave constant squeaks of
frustration as the taxi encountered red lights or slow drivers.
Finally, they were at the house. Daniel ran up the path and
flung the door open, startling his brother and sister in the
living room. He immediately realised that however quickly
he’d managed to return, it wasn’t fast enough. Alex gave him
a cold stare before running out of the room, while Dee stood
with her arms folded, her expression as sullen and angry as
Daniel had ever seen it.

“You promised.”
“I know. I let you know, and I tried to—”
“Doesn’t matter. You promised. You said things would

get better when you got this job, but it’s only got worse. We
hardly see you in the evenings, and you’re so tired the rest of
the time. It’s not worth it, Daniel.” She bit her lip, clearly
fighting back tears, but when Daniel went to put his arm
around her, she pulled back. “No. Go to Alex.”

“I’m sorry, DeeDee. Did you have supper?”
“Sort of. He was too upset to eat, and he didn’t want the

‘stupid cake’ I made for him.” The lip wobbled again. “Go!”

Daniel went, because there was only one of him to go

around two upset siblings.

Alex was lying on his bed on his stomach, petting Veen.

He didn’t look at Daniel as he came in. “Go away. I don’t
want to talk to you.”

“I know. Happy birthday anyway.”
“Don’t be stupid. It sucked. You suck. This job sucks.”

He rolled over and glared at Daniel with red eyes. “You
don’t even need to work. Dee says there’s plenty of money in
the bank.”

Daniel sat on the end of the bed. “That’s got to cover a

lot of things, Alex. You and Dee going to university, our
bills, house repairs, emergencies—that kind of thing. It’s not
that much, and there’s no more to come. Not for a while,
anyway,” he amended, thinking of the protracted legal
battles, and the obduracy of companies denying liability. “If I
can’t look after you, then social services will have to take
over. I have to prove I can manage.”

“They won’t take us away. Not when you’re around.”
“They might. I can’t risk that. Look, I’m really, really

sorry. I let you down, and I knew you’d be mad at me. But
we’ve been through worse, right? Got through it?” He
reached out and stroked his brother’s carroty curls. “It’s just
the three of us, kiddo. We can’t fight with each other.”

“Can’t you find another job? You never said you’d have

to work late all the time.”

“I didn’t know. Give me a little while longer. Once I

have a bit more experience, I can apply for other jobs.”

“I wish I was older, then I could get a job instead.”
Daniel ruffled his hair and tried to smile. “I wish you

were too. You’d be better than me, I bet. Um...Dee has a
cake.”

“Don’t want anything. Not hungry.”
“Alex, she’s crying. I know it’s my fault, but I don’t know

what to do. It would mean a lot to me if you came downstairs
and helped me cheer her up.”

“You spoiled my birthday.”
“It’s not over, though. And I’m home now. Can we have

some cake and see if that helps? I’ve got a birthday present
for you somewhere.”

Alex’s mouth moved as if he was about to say he didn’t

want any stupid present, but he didn’t actually say it.

“Please?”
“Okay. But I still hate your job.”
“I don’t like it much either. We just have to hang on a

little longer. We can do it, if we do it together.”

Alex screwed up his face. “You sound like a TV

commercial.”

Daniel grinned. “Sorry. Come on. I’m starving.” Kani

squeaked. “So is he.” He reached over to hug his brother. To
his relief, Alex let him. “We’ll get through this, Alex. Just
hold on.”

“It’s so hard. I miss Mum and Dad.”
“Me too. All the time.” He kissed his brother’s head.

“But at least I have you and Dee.” Kani chirped and leapt up
onto Alex’s shoulder to lick one side of his face, while Veen
nibbled Alex’s ear on the other side. “And you too,
fuzzballs.”

Chapter 6

Spen kept a close eye on the security logs for the next

two weeks, and enjoyed a little burst of satisfaction every
time he saw Daniel’s ID register his departure by six every
evening—sometimes even as early as five. He wondered
how Noble explained the sudden drop off in overtime
requests to Daniel. Maybe he hadn’t bothered, expecting his
PA to accept management oddities as part of the job.

Spen didn’t really care so long as Daniel wasn’t being

pressured into working long hours and being perved over by
a creepy boss. The other change in behaviour he did care
about, since it meant Daniel no longer came down to IT,
limiting his communications to email and rare phone calls.
Spen didn’t know if it was by Noball’s orders, or whether
Daniel was angry about his intervention. He figured
eventually he’d find out, since the Cross-Channel project
was still on-going, and likely to be rolled out across all their
offices after the national conference. Unless Noble handed it
off to someone else—which, Spen judged, an egotist like him
would never do—he would have to keep working with IT,
and since Noble was still technologically inept, he would
need Daniel’s help. Spen gave it another week before Noble
stopped sulking, and he doubted Daniel’s gentle personality
could sustain rage for anything like that long. The emails and
calls were polite enough, so no change there. Maybe he’d
make another attempt to entice Daniel out to the Friday pub

night soon, now he couldn’t use the overtime as an excuse.

The chance to have a drink and a chat came sooner than

Spen expected. He left a little later than planned on Tuesday
and almost knocked Daniel over as he came around the
corner from the stairs. “There he is. Hello stranger.”
Daniel’s big green eyes stared wildly, not really seeing him
at all. “Daniel? What’s wrong?”

“I can’t...just leave me....” He pushed past Spen and

bolted for the men’s toilet. Sensing it wasn’t a sudden bout
of nausea which had sent him running, Spen gave chase.

He found Daniel sitting on the floor at the far end of the

room, next to a urinal. “Hey, kid, you can’t sit there. It’s
dirty.”

“Don’t care.” He looked up at Spen, his face glistening

with tears. “Leave me alone.”

“No, don’t think so.” Spen crouched down and hoped

like hell no one else would come in. “Did something
happen? Something at home? Tony get mad about
something?”

“I can’t...you wouldn’t understand. I just have to...but I

can’t.”

Spen frowned at him, then stood, pulled some paper off

the roll and wet it. He crouched again and handed the wetted
towel to Daniel. “Wipe your face, then stand up. You need to
get out of here. Well away from here.”

Daniel obeyed, accepted Spen’s help to stand up, and

threw the screwed up towel at the bin with unnecessary
force. “I’m okay now,” he said, voice as flat as a computer
simulation.

“Yeah, right. Look, do you have time for a quick drink?

We can talk.”

Daniel’s eyes darted about in panic. “I can’t...I have to

get home.”

“Half an hour? Give them a call? Daniel, I’m worried

about you.”

“Half an hour?”
“An hour max. Just call who you need to.”
He shook his head. “It’s okay. They don’t count on me

being home early any more.”

Spen didn’t comment on that, though he could strangle

bloody Tony Noble. “Come on, it’s only around the corner.”

Wednesdays were quiet in their local. It was usually

quiet anyway, being more of a lunchtime crowd type of
place. “Do you drink? Want a beer? My shout.”

Daniel looked about to protest, then his shoulders

slumped in defeat. “Half of bitter, please.”

Spen ordered the same, and some crisps to soak it up. He

guided Daniel over to a corner and made him sit. “Where’s
Kani?”

“Kani? Oh...here.” A grey head suddenly popped out of

the middle of Daniel’s chest, and gave an interrogative chirp.
“It’s okay, you can come out now.” Kani jumped out and

onto the table, taking a sniff at Daniel’s beer glass. Daniel
stroked him gently, though rather distractedly.

“What’s going on? Why are you keeping Kani out of

sight? And drink that. You look like you need it.”

Daniel took a sip, then a longer slurp. “Tony told me to

keep Kani inside at work. Says it’s unprofessional.” He said
it as if it was of no importance, but his eyes went red again.
Kani gave an indignant squeak, even stamping his little feet
to make the point.

“He’s the only person in the whole damn office who

thinks that. That’s unreasonable, and unfair on Kani.”

“Yeah. But he’s my boss. I can’t lose my job over that.

Only I’m going to lose it anyway.”

Spen opened the crisps and set the bag in front of Daniel.

“Eat those, and drink that beer. No way is Tony going to fire
you. You’re too good at your job.”

Daniel picked at the crisps but didn’t eat one. Kani

snuffled about in the packet, then stuck his nose in Daniel’s
beer. Daniel waved him off and took another long slurp.
“He’s going to fire me because I can’t go to the national
conference. He says I have to go to it or it’s my job.”

Spen blinked. “Wait a bloody minute. He can’t say things

like that. You told him why? Is it your family? Does he know
about that?”

“He knows. I thought he understood.”
“Understood what, exactly?”

“I’m...sole guardian for my brother and sister. She’s

sixteen. He just turned eleven. Mum and Dad...died. Last
year, in an accident.”

“I’m sorry. That’s a lot to handle.”
“Yeah.” Daniel’s voice still held no passion or anger,

just a dull misery that made Spen ache to hear. “I can’t leave
them on their own for a week. There’s no one I can ask to
look after them. No one I would trust. Dee might cope on her
own, but not with Alex, and it would be a shitty thing to do to
them anyway. They get so lonely.” He looked up, and added
quietly, “We all do.”

“No, you can’t leave them. Tony can’t force you to either.

It’s totally against company regulations, and you should tell
him that. Tell HR too.”

“No, no, I can’t.” For the first time, he became a little

animated, his cheeks flushing. “I can’t lose this job. I’m still
on probation. He can fire me at will, no need for a reason,
though I’m sure he has plenty of reasons he can come up
with. He could even use what happened with Kani and
Julian.”

“If he tries that, Julian’s boss will eat him alive.”
“Maybe, but I’ll still be gone. I need this job, Spen. If I

push back, I’ll still end up losing it, only with a worse
reference than what he’ll give me anyway. I’m so fucked.”
He finished his beer in a long swallow. Spen silently pushed
over his untouched glass. “Thanks. Look, I appreciate the

concern, but I don’t have a choice in this. You can’t help. I’ll
have to tell him no, and then I’ll have to leave. My family are
everything to me. I’m all they have.” He rubbed his eyes.
“God, Mum and Dad would be ashamed of me not coping
with this.”

“I think they’d be proud as hell of you, and furious with

Tony, who’s an A-grade prick. He can’t give you a bad
reference because you complained to HR.”

“Want to bet? I don’t have any work experience outside

this. I mean, usable experience. All he has to do is write a
bland, unenthusiastic reference and the message will get
through. I don’t have an employment record to set against it.”

“You’ve got amazing IT skills, though.”
“But no degree. That’s why it took forever to get this job.

I’m still amazed I got it, considering. Now I’m going to lose
it anyway.”

“There’s really no one you can ask to help? No relatives?

Friends?”

“No.” Daniel started on Spen’s glass, staring down at the

table and Kani patting a crisp without really seeing either.
“Mum was an only child, and Dad’s sister lives overseas.
Aunt Lisa offered to have us move out to her but I thought it
would be too much for us to deal with. Our grandparents live
on the other side of the country, and they’re both frail.
Grandma had a minor heart attack when she heard the news
about the accident, and then Granddad was diagnosed with

cancer two months later. They want to help but....”

“You don’t want to put any pressure on them.”
“Yes, exactly. Besides, Dee’s about to sit exams. I can’t

uproot her to send her to stay with them. No one else lives
close, and people...well, let’s just say we weren’t exactly
deluged with offers to help,” he said bitterly. “Maybe I could
hire a nanny or something? Do they have people like that for
older kids? But it would have to be someone Dee and Alex
liked, or it would be worse than nothing. There’s no time to
organise it.”

“I’d offer to help, but I’m going to that stupid conference

too...hang on.”

“What?”
“Where do you live?”
Daniel named a suburb not that far from Spen’s parents’

house—a fifteen-minute bus ride at most, less in a car. “Why
do you want to know?”

“Because my mum’s a teacher—”
“Aren’t you lucky.”
Spen ignored the uncharacteristic sarcasm. “No, you’re

lucky, I hope. Were you serious that Dee and Alex don’t
expect you home early?”

Daniel frowned in confusion. “Mostly, though I should

call them soon. Why?”

“Because I think you need to meet my parents. They might

be the answer to your problem.”

“Spen, that’s nice of you but I can’t—”
Spen held up his hand. “Yes, you can. Unless you really

want to start job hunting again?”

“No, but—”
“Then drink up, go wash your face, and I’ll call Mum.”

~~~~~~~~

An hour later, Daniel could barely remember the utter

despair which had swamped him after the terse, unfriendly
conversation with his boss just before he’d left work. Like a
force of nature, Spen had swept him up and carried Daniel
along in his own optimism, depositing him in the warm,
friendly kitchen of his warm and friendly parents. Spen’s
mother had barely let her son explain Daniel’s dilemma
before exclaiming, “Well, that’s easy, child. Why can’t we
keep an eye on them while you’re away?”

“Mrs Reardon, you don’t even know us.”
“Of course I don’t, but that’s easily fixed. You and

Spencer go fetch your brother and sister and we can talk
about this. Good heavens, Daniel. You’ve been struggling on
your own all this time? You poor children.” She stroked his
hair, and a few tears leaked out in sorrow as he remembered
his own mother doing the same thing. “Now, don’t cry, dear.
Have you had supper? Have they? Then you call them right
now and invite them over. Spencer, you and Daniel take the
car.”

“Yes, Mum,” Spen had said, grinning at Daniel. “Go on,

call them.”

Daniel had, and fifteen minutes later, they were at

Daniel’s house. Alex threw open the door, and took in the
entire length of Spen’s figure. Veen bounced up and down in
excitement on his shoulder. “Gosh, you’re....”

“Black?” Spen said, winking at Daniel who was both

horrified and close to laughing out loud.

“Enormous!” Alex exclaimed. “Dee! You won’t believe

this!”

“Alex, don’t be rude,” Daniel chided. “Dee? Are you

ready?”

She came running down the hall but stopped short when

she saw Spen. “Wow. I wish I was that tall.”

“Spen, this is my sister, Dee,” Daniel said. “Who usually

has more manners.” She made a face at him. “Everything
locked up?”

“Yes, and the stove’s off, so don’t worry. Are you all

huge in your family?” she asked Spen.

“I’m a bit of a freak,” Spen said, apparently not bothered

at all by the kids’ obsession with his height, “but we’re all
pretty tall. Hope you’re hungry. Mum was unloading the
freezer when we left and I think she thinks there are ten of
you.”

“I’m starving,” Alex said.
Daniel ruffled his hair. “You’re always starving.”
“I’m a growing boy. Oooh, he’s cute.”

For a startled moment, Daniel thought his brother meant

Spen, but then realised that he’d spotted Myko. “Yes, he is,
but we can make introductions later. We don’t want to keep
the Reardons waiting.”

“This way,” Spen said, leading Dee and Alex to the car

while Daniel locked the front door. Daniel didn’t want to
stop and think about all this because then he’d be overcome
with embarrassment and find a way of talking himself out of
the answer to his problem. He had to resist that because this
could be so good for Dee and Alex. Their excitement was a
sign of just how limited their lives had become since their
parents had died. To be able to share the burden for even a
few days...it was selfish to impose on a stranger, but Mrs
Reardon had been so instantly likeable, he couldn’t resist.
He didn’t want to resist.

He held his breath as Spen ushered Dee and Alex into his

mother’s kitchen. This wouldn’t work if they didn’t like her
or trust her. Dee hesitated as she entered the room, taking it
all in and looking worried. Mrs Reardon smiled. “Come in,
dear. We don’t bite. At least, not since Spen was six, we
haven’t.”

Spen smiled seraphically at the reminder of past

misdeeds. Daniel had trouble imagining him ever biting
anyone, even at six years old.

Dee grinned. “Alex bit me when he was eight.”
“Did not!”

“You so did. Mum had to put a bandage on my arm.”
“It was an accident. My teeth slipped.”
Daniel’s face hurt from hiding his amusement. Spen

looked at Dee. Dee looked at Mrs Reardon. They all looked
at Alex, turning red. “Well, dear, I hope your teeth are under
control now,” Mrs Reardon said, her voice shaking a little
from suppressed laughter. “Care to apply them to a steak and
kidney pie?”

Alex glanced sideways at her. “Does it have mushrooms?

I don’t like mushrooms.”

“No mushrooms,” Mr Reardon said. “They’re the work

of the devil and make my bowels unhappy.”

His wife tsked. “Richard, don’t mention your bowels in

my kitchen, or you’ll put us all off our food. Alex, there are
no mushrooms in it, but if you don’t like the pie, I can find
something else.”

“The pie’ll be fine, Mrs Reardon.” Daniel gently shoved

his brother towards the table. “Come on, squirt. I thought you
were starving.”

“I am!”
Mrs Reardon’s wonderful savoury pie—and Mr

Reardon’s fruit salad for dessert—destroyed any lingering
hesitation, not that Daniel had seen much from his siblings.
Dee was delighted to have a sympathetic adult to talk to
about her impending exams, and listened appreciatively to
Mrs Reardon’s advice on the subject. Mr Reardon and Alex

discovered a mutual love of building model engines, and
spent much of the meal off in a world of their own. Daniel
and Spen were the only ones who had trouble finding
something to talk about. Daniel didn’t want to discuss work
or his boss, or Spen’s obvious disapproval of Tony, and
Spen was thankfully too tactful to raise it himself in front of
the kids.

The truth was, there were lots of things Daniel wanted to

talk to Spen about, but his tongue tangled up every time Spen
turned his kind eyes on him. His crush had only grown worse
in the weeks since Daniel had met the man, and with this
unexpected act of generosity towards Daniel and his
siblings, it now threatened to turn into full-blown hero
worship. Spen was everything Daniel could ever hope to be.
He wished so much that circumstances had allowed them to
meet as equals, instead of as a bumbling newcomer
desperately trying to find his feet with the help of a calm,
successful professional. Daniel’s boss was the only person
at work he’d told about his home situation before, and that
was only to explain why he hadn’t finished his degree. He
hadn’t wanted people to see him as a charity case, but he
hadn’t had much choice once Spen had cornered him. Now
Spen would just view him as a nice but helpless kid in need
of rescue, and not as a potentially attractive adult. Not that
Daniel had had much hope of catching Spen’s eye in the first
place.

“Is your house the one your parents owned?” Spen asked

as they helped clear the plates.

“Yes. We all grew up there, and moving was more hassle

than we could deal with. You’ve always lived at home?”
Daniel flushed, wondering if that was too personal a
question, but it was out now.

“Oh no, only since I broke up with Robert a few months

back. I was living in his apartment until then.”

Alex’s head swivelled. “Are you gay, Spen?” Dee

smacked his arm. “What?” he said, giving Dee a hurt look.
“Mum said there was nothing wrong with being gay. Daniel
is.”

Daniel closed his eyes and prayed to disappear into the

floor. Even Kani meeped and went inside in sheer self-
defence.

“Yes, I’m gay,” Spen said casually. “And of course

there’s nothing wrong with it. Are you gay, Alex?”

“I don’t think so,” Alex said thoughtfully. “How can you

tell?”

Mr and Mrs Reardon, smiling benevolently, kept quiet

through all this, letting the young people handle things.
Daniel relaxed a little. They didn’t have a problem, at least.
“Maybe we can talk about that later,” Daniel suggested. “It’s
nearly nine. Spen and I have to work tomorrow and you have
school.”

“Wish I didn’t,” Alex grumbled. “Can’t wait until the

long hols.”

“Only a few more weeks,” Daniel said. “Help us finish

clearing, and then if Spen could give us a lift back?”

“You go now, dear,” Mrs Reardon said. “We’ll sort this

out. Now, we’ll finalise things over the next few days but
I’m happy for Dee and Alex to stay here, or I can pop over in
the evenings. In any event, they’ll have us as an emergency
contact, or even if they’re just a bit lonely in the evenings
and want some company.”

Daniel took her hand. “You’re a lifesaver. Thank you so

much.”

“Not at all, child. It’s a pleasure. You’re all so lovely,

and it’s such a shame what happened. I want to help. We all
do.”

Spen came up behind Daniel and put his hand on his

shoulder. “Yeah, we do. I just wish I was going to be
around. Looks like I’ll have to babysit you at the conference
instead.”

Daniel’s face felt hot enough to convert water into steam.

“I don’t need a babysitter,” he muttered.

“Then you can babysit me. Okay, kids, got your coats and

kems? I won’t be long, Mum. Thanks.” Spen kissed her
cheek, and she hugged him. The stone in Daniel’s chest got a
little more painful and cold. Their relationship was so like
Daniel’s had been with his parents. Would he ever be over
losing the two of them?

Spen shooed Dee and Alex down the hall, but as Daniel

followed them, Spen put his hand back on his shoulder.
“Must be hard,” he said quietly. “I wouldn’t be able to bear
losing mine.”

Daniel turned and looked up at Spen’s face through tear-

blurred vision. “Sometimes I don’t think I can either.”

Spen squeezed his shoulder. “You’re strong. You’ll make

it.”

Daniel tried to smile. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Come on, let’s get you all home.”

~~~~~~~~

Dee and Alex chattered happily to Spen as he drove, but

even with answering their cheerful questions and
concentrating on the road, Spen was conscious of Daniel’s
silence as he sat slumped in the front passenger seat, staring
blank-eyed out the window. Now Spen had seen how close
to the surface his misery was, no matter how good Daniel
was at hiding it, he was sorry he hadn’t found a chance to
somehow bring up Daniel’s home situation before. But
maybe Daniel wouldn’t have thanked him for exposing his
sorrow. The wonder of it was how well they all coped. Dee
and Alex were so normal, so ready to accept happiness, and
even though Daniel obviously carried the greatest burden, he
did so with grace Spen doubted he could have managed.

But that grace wouldn’t be enough unless Spen—or

someone with more power than he had—pulled that bastard

Noble off Daniel’s back. Sure, it looked like this crisis
could be managed, but if Noball was prepared to pull a dirty
stunt like threaten Daniel’s job over attending a conference,
then there was no limit to what he might try. Spen had also
noticed that Daniel hadn’t mentioned Spen’s ‘accidental’
interruption of Noble’s late night activities, nor had shown
any resentment over it. Maybe Daniel would never come
right out and thank Spen for it, but it looked more and more
as if Spen’s intervention hadn’t been unwelcome—at least
by Daniel.

He really needed to involve HR but without Daniel’s

cooperation, there would be little point. Maybe Spen could
work on him while at the conference.

“Here we are,” he said, pulling into a space in front of

Daniel’s house.

Daniel roused. “Oh. Thank you, Spen. I can’t tell you

how grateful I am.”

“It’s a pleasure, honest.”
Dee and Alex thanked him too, then ran up the path to the

house. Lights went on seconds later. Daniel went to open his
door, but Spen said, “Hold on a sec.” Daniel looked at him,
puzzled. “They’ll be asking who wants to share rooms at the
conference. If you don’t want to share with Tony, I haven’t
arranged anything yet.”

In the light from the street lamp, Daniel’s expression slid

rapidly from surprise to relief. “Oh. I’d like that, if you

wouldn’t mind.”

“Of course not. I hate these damn things and at least I

won’t have to worry about some boring junior manager
sharing with me.” Daniel smiled a little. “You know...you
can ask for help. It’s not a sign of weakness.”

“I didn’t have anyone to ask before. I got used to...you

know...not asking.”

“Now you have me. And my parents.”
“Yes. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Oh, and Kani can play in IT anytime.

Don’t keep him locked away all day. Kems hate that.”

“I know. I’ll send him down. I know he’ll love it.”
“So will we. Sleep well, and no more stressing about

Tony fucking Noble.”

Daniel gave him the first truly happy smile of the night.

“No more stressing, I promise. ‘Night, Spen.”

Spen watched him walk up the path, and waited until the

porch light went out. It probably wasn’t a good idea to
encourage the warm glow of happiness that encounters with
Daniel so often gave him. If there was one thing that kid
didn’t need, it was another ‘admirer’. But there was nothing
wrong with feeling glad he could help, or the righteous
pleasure at stuffing Tony Noble’s greasy tactics, so Spen
would enjoy those without guilt. With any luck, he’d have the
satisfaction of watching Daniel grow in confidence, and
move on from working for Noble into a job more suited to

his talents and intelligence.

Spen sighed and started the engine. Myko popped out to

chirp quietly in concern. Spen patted his head. “I’m okay,
fuzzball. We don’t always get what we want, right?”

Myko squeaked and rubbed against Spen’s hand. Nice to

have someone who understood, and who would always keep
his secrets.

Chapter 7

Two weeks earlier, Daniel had had no prospect of

enjoying his enforced attendance at the company’s national
conference. Even this afternoon, as he said goodbye to Dee
and Alex after he and Spen left them at the Reardons’ house,
he couldn’t muster any more than resignation as he
contemplated a week in a dull chain hotel, stuck making
presentations and handouts for Tony, and sleeping in what
would probably be a hard and uncomfortable bed. He’d
stayed in a couple of similar hotels on family holidays, and
the novelty had long since worn off.

But now, sitting across from Spen on the train heading

north, he felt something close to cheerful. Dee and Alex were
in safe, kind hands—and in the care of people who would
make sure their schoolwork wouldn’t suffer. Spen’s offer to
share a room had given Daniel a perfect answer to Tony’s
assumption that he and Daniel would be sharing. And now he
had the company of a man he liked a lot, maybe more than he
should, and a break of sorts from the grind of the office, and
the disapproval of the other PAs.

“The only part about this I’m looking forward to is the

food,” Spen said, pulling a face at the train’s approximation
of coffee. Daniel hadn’t even bothered, sticking to fruit juice.
“The expense budget is pretty generous. Just watch out for
the boozers. Some of the managers drink like camels.”

“I can’t imagine what could induce me to want to drink

with anyone except you.” Spen grinned at Daniel’s
declaration. “Oh you know what I mean.”

“I do. They’re not all bad. The IT guys from Northern are

fun, so long as I don’t spend too long around them. I’m too
old for that kind of thing now.” Daniel lifted an eyebrow at
that statement. “No, it’s true. I like a quiet pint or two. That
was one of the things that did for me and my ex. He was a
party animal. Me, not so much.”

“You were together a while, though?”
“Four years. I still care a lot about him. He’s a good guy,

smart. But he didn’t want to settle down, and I got tired of
acting like a kid.”

“Not every kid drinks until they puke.”
“What, never?”
Daniel’s face grew warm. “Maybe once,” he mumbled.

“But I don’t like being drunk. I really hate hangovers. Such a
waste of study time.”

Spen’s grin slipped a little. “Are you planning to go back

to the degree when things settle down?”

Daniel shrugged, but tried not to let the pain in his chest

show in his expression. “Maybe. Might take a while. I can’t
go back to where I was enrolled, not while Alex is still
young. They need me at home. The degree’s not important,
set against everything else. If the prosecution is ever
finished, the lawsuit is over, we win a payout, Dee gets
through her exams, and Alex finishes school.... My study’s

pretty low down the list.”

“So you keep working for Tony Noble or someone like

him, when you could be working on power stations and
water treatment plants and...what is it you guys build?”

“Just about everything,” Daniel admitted, the pain

growing sharper. “Yes, if I have to. At least until Dee and
Alex are independent. I’m their parent now. Their needs
come first.”

“Yes, I know.” Spen smiled at him, a thousand watts of

kindness that shone on the hidden stone in Daniel’s chest and
warmed it a little. “You’re quietly amazing.”

“You’d do the same for your brothers.”
“Maybe. But I’m the youngest, so it wouldn’t come up.

It’s not just that you’re doing it, it’s that you’re doing it so
well. Dee and Alex are so well-adjusted.”

Thinking back to a month ago and Alex’s miserable

birthday, Daniel couldn’t agree. “Mum and Dad did all that.
I’ve had it easy.”

“And you could still have fucked it up. Give yourself

credit, kid.”

“If you insist.”
Spen smiled again and shook his head. It was nice to

have someone who thought so well of him, but Daniel didn’t
like praise for what he couldn’t claim proper credit for.
Still, it wasn’t worth arguing about. “We’ll be there in ten
minutes.”

“Then countdown until we can escape. Why can’t they

have this damn thing somewhere warm, and by a beach?”

“Because we’d all skive off and not do any work?”
“See? Told you that you were smart.”
Daniel rolled his eyes. Yes, if he had to be here against

his will, he could be worse off than in Spen’s company. It
might even be fun. He wasn’t sure if he remembered what fun
was like, but he hoped he’d know it if he had the chance.

~~~~~~~~

He was right about the bed, and the room was as bland

and uninspiring as he’d expected. But there was more space
than he expected, plenty of room for their bags, and fast
internet access, which was all he needed. Tony wouldn’t
arrive until late that evening, so tonight was a little like a
holiday—at least Spen decided to make it one. He
encouraged Daniel to explore the hotel’s dinner menu and
not worry about the cost—“You won’t be able to come up to
half of what some of the managers will spend, so enjoy”—
and enjoyed a pint of decent beer with him.

Later, after they’d showered and Daniel had called Dee

as he’d promised to do every night, Spen chose a science
fiction movie from the subscription channel. They watched it
lying on their beds in their underwear, while the two kems
curled up on Daniel’s stomach, disdaining any entertainment
than each other. The two humans spent the next two hours
cheerfully picking apart the bad science and logical idiocies,

while Daniel gained a new appreciation of just how big a
nerd Spen was.

“It’s ridiculous,” Daniel said as the movie ended. “You

can’t reverse engineer an alien operating system or write a
virus when you don’t even share an alphabet or numbering
system.”

“No, wait, you’re forgetting the secret government

research.” Daniel looked at Spen with maximum scepticism.
“Remember that throwaway line about whathisface spending
years looking through the archives when he had clearance.
So if you assume the government had its best and brightest
working on translating the alien data and decoding the
systems—”

“A big ‘if’, Spen.”
“Oh come on. What else would they be doing with it?”
“Scratching their heads and wondering where to start?

Where’s your Rosetta Stone? How do you start?”

“What if the aliens were studying us and had begun to

translate one Earth language into their own?”

“So...in your theory, even if there was a usable

dictionary, and by some miracle our hero had a
comprehensive understanding of the operating system, he
still has to get past the security system of a culture capable of
building force fields and organic spaceship, and somehow
discover and exploit a weakness in an as yet unknown
routine, one which has to be critical for the power generation

of this hitherto invulnerable vehicle.” Daniel folded his arms
and dared Spen to rebut his argument. “It’s utterly
implausible.”

“I never said it was easy.” Daniel hooted in derision.

Spen pretended to be offended. “Hey, I wrote a paper on it at
University.”

“You wrote a paper on this movie.”
“Well, yeah. The lecturer told us to analyse the use of IT

in popular culture and discuss the plausibility of techniques
and solutions. I got an A.”

“You win. No one is nerdier that you.”
Spen punched the air. “Yay, I win. Wouldn’t that be the

coolest job in the world? Decoding alien programming?”

“No, building alien spaceships would be the coolest.”
“You build the spaceship, I’ll write the code.”
“Deal,” Daniel agreed. The pang was still there, but,

relaxed and comfortable with two kems steadily sending out
gentle pulses of affection, he didn’t feel the hurt as much as
he normally would. Maybe one day it wouldn’t hurt at all.

Spen yawned. “Okay, that’s my limit. I’m going to order

breakfast to be delivered and I suggest you do too. You don’t
want to be ambushed by corporate types before you’ve had
your coffee.”

“Good idea.”
“You fill out the card while I use the loo, then I’ll stick it

outside. Myko?”

His kem gave a delicate yawn of his own, but declined to

move. “Lazy brat,” Spen said, grinning as he reached down
and scratched behind his kem’s ears. “He likes you.”

“It’s mutual. Kani likes him even better than Veen or Lili.

Weird.”

“Yeah. Kems are a mystery.” Spen tossed the breakfast

card over to him. “There. Go wild.”

“So much excitement for one day. Can I bear it?”
“You’ll survive.”
Daniel suppressed a sigh of admiration at the sight of the

long, smooth-skinned back as Spen disappeared into the
bathroom. It was a little like sharing a room back at Uni with
Asif, something Daniel missed along with so many other
things. But though Asif was handsome and attractive in a
totally straight way, Daniel had been too caught up in his
studies to be distracted by unrequited lust. Even now, his
many worries tended to keep his libido well below nuisance
levels. Didn’t stop him wishing, in full knowledge of how
hopeless it was, that Spen would see him differently, or that
they had started a friendship outside work.

When he returned from cleaning his teeth, Myko and Kani

had decamped to Spen’s bed. “Fickle,” he muttered. Kani
chirped and flicked his tail, but stayed right where he was on
Spen’s chest. “Fine, you made your bed, now you lie on
him.”

Spen grinned at him around the ball of fur. “Do you get

the feeling we’re being played?”

“I think we could be. Good night, Spen.”
“Sleep well, Daniel.”
He might even do that.

~~~~~~~~

Daniel had reason to be glad of that lazy evening come

Monday morning. Tony called while they were still eating
breakfast, and gave Daniel half an hour to finish his meal,
shower, dress, and come to his room on the floor above.
From then until six that evening, he didn’t have a moment to
call his own. Even lunch was spent listening to Tony
network with his fellow managers, so he could help Tony
fine tune his handouts for the big presentation about Cross-
Channel on Wednesday afternoon. The rest of the time he had
to help Tony rehearse his talk and slide timing, prepare
additional graphs and graphics, run back and forth to the
printers two blocks from the hotel to order and collect
materials for the audience, and somehow also handle the
usual office emails, calls and enquiries because Tony was
adamant that his door was never closed. Telling the clients
he was “away” was unacceptable.

Daniel had his own presentation to give jointly with Spen

on the day after Tony’s, on some of the practical issues of the
national rollout of Cross-Channel. He wasn’t nervous—it
wasn’t any more challenging than delivering a paper to his
class, and Spen would handle the hard stuff—but there were

materials to print for that as well. Tony had insisted on
leaving it all to the very last minute so it could be as up-to-
date and relevant as possible. Spen, unsurprisingly, had not
been complimentary about that plan. Daniel personally tried
not to dwell on whether Tony was effective at his job or not,
because he was afraid that if he went down that line of
thinking, his discontent with his job would grow to the point
where it was impossible to continue. He chose to
concentrate on his own tasks and performing them to the limit
of his ability. Spen had the luxury of criticism. Daniel didn’t.

Finally Tony set him free so he could wine and dine with

the national office people—Daniel was far too lowly to
attend, much to his relief. Spen found him in the foyer and
announced, “Room service”, in a tone that brooked no
argument. Not that Daniel had one to offer, or wanted one.
Spen had, through his regional colleagues, obtained copies
of two hard to find films Daniel had mentioned wishing he
had seen—Spen waved the thumb drive in triumph as they
rode the elevator up to their floor. They ate their room
service supper while sitting cross-legged on Spen’s bed,
watching the first film on his laptop. The kems delivered
their verdict on the entertainment by refusing to sit still,
romping around the room, returning to one or other of the
humans’ laps for cuddles and scritches, before heading off to
explore the bathroom or the closet again.

“Good special effects,” Daniel said politely.

“Yeah, but crap acting and toilet paper plot. It’s okay.

The second one is awesome. You just need to see the first
one for set up.” Spen cracked his spine. The position was
more awkward for him because of his greater height, forcing
him to hunch over the computer. “You comfortable there?
You can lie down. There’s room for two. I’ll keep my hands
to myself, I swear.”

Daniel saw his face slowly turn scarlet in the mirror on

the wall opposite him. “Um...okay. Just let me...wash my
face.”

He splashed cold water on his burning skin until the

colour turned back to its usual paleness. Spen had an
advantage in that way—even if he was prone to blushing,
which he probably wasn’t, every passing mood or
embarrassment didn’t show itself on his dark face the way it
did on Daniel’s.

Oh God. There was no way to refuse Spen’s innocent

invitation without looking as if Daniel was reading much
more into it than there was, but was his self-control up to it?
Would Spen even care if it wasn’t?

Fortunately Kani came to his rescue. The little nuisance,

after behaving like a terror during the first movie, lay
demurely on Daniel’s lap all through the second one, and
didn’t move even when Myko joined him from time to time.
Daniel gave him lots of petting and scritches in gratitude,
and was able to concentrate on the film—which was, as

promised, much better than the first—rather than on Spen. He
could even feel comfortable stretched out next to Spen like
this, almost like he would if he was watching a movie with
Alex.

Almost. Spen’s long legs and endearingly enormous feet

distracted Daniel more than they should have. But he didn’t
disgrace or embarrass himself, and managed to enjoy the
movie in all its mindless theatrics. The plot was beyond
absurd, but the pace was fast enough that it hardly mattered.

“High concept to the max,” Spen rightly summarised.

“Good fun though. Another?”

Daniel took the chance to gracefully escape from the

heavenly torment of Spen’s bed. “I’d love to, but Tony’s
going to be at me first thing again.”

“Tell him to fuck off. You don’t start at eight in the

office.”

“Right, and after that I won’t have to worry about starting

at all. You’d love it if Luke or Jyoti told you to screw off.”

Spen grinned. “They do it half a dozen times a day. But

then I have a sense of humour and Noball doesn’t.”

“Oh thanks. Now I have to look at him with a straight

face and remember you calling him that.”

Spen made a little bow. “You’re welcome. You should

lighten up, Danny.”

Daniel growled. “I’ll lighten up when the world stops

sucking.”

Spen sat up, and his expression turned suddenly serious.

“Did it suck tonight?”

“No. No, it didn’t. Thank you. You know what I mean,

though.”

“Yes, I do. I can’t fix the rest of it, but if I can give you a

little break from the misery sometimes....”

Daniel turned away a little to hide the effect Spen’s kind

words—the warmth in his eyes—had on him. He did not
want to cry in front of him again. “Thanks. I’ll use the
bathroom, if you want to fill out the breakfast card, okay?”
He hurried off before his voice betrayed him. Damn it, Spen
was so bad for his control in so many ways. But without
Spen, Daniel didn’t know that he would cope at all right
now.

Chapter 8

When Daniel’s mobile went off again as they were eating

breakfast, Spen cursed Tony Noble in his mind a lot more
fluently than he dared let fly in front of Daniel. Not that his
feelings were a secret, but it made Daniel’s job more
difficult, and wasn’t very professional either. He considered
Noble to be abusing the privilege of having his PA at the
conference, and treating Daniel disrespectfully. Ironically,
Spen’s regard for Daniel stopped him complaining to Noble
directly, even though, since they were both the same
managerial grade, he was perfectly entitled to do so.
However, complaining was all he could do, and Noble
would only take it out on Daniel. Spen was waiting for
Noble to unequivocally cross the line in a way that didn’t
compromise Daniel, and then he planned to raise holy hell. It
wasn’t right that a manager in a company working with
vulnerable people should treat a vulnerable employee like
shit, especially if he’d done it before.

But Spen had to be discreet, so for now he did what he

could to protect Daniel and bolster his confidence. The kid
had positively bloomed away from the pressures of the
office and looking after his brother and sister, even with his
boss being a prick. If he took even a little bit of that self-
assurance and happiness back home, Spen would consider
his efforts a success, and a pleasure. He liked Daniel’s smile
and his company. He’d enjoy those as long as he could,

without a twinge of conscience.

He saw little of Daniel during the day, and when he did,

it was usually as Daniel was rushing out of the hotel or into
the lift, carrying bundles of papers, or talking on his phone.
Noble was the only manager at his level to have his PA with
him, a concession because of the importance of the Cross-
Channel project. Spen’s regional colleagues had commented
unflatteringly on that fact during their informal meetings.
Spen didn’t know a single person who held Noball in high
regard and yet he was senior management’s fair-haired boy.
Spen could easily run the IT department for a company a
hundred times the size of the one in which he worked, but he
would never understand that kind of business politics.

Finally

Wednesday

afternoon

arrived,

and

the

presentation to all the regional managers and the national
office was held. Daniel and Spen sat at the back, managing
the audiovisual. Noble spoke apparently extempore, though
Spen knew from Daniel how carefully rehearsed the speech
was. The act worked, and Spen had to grant the man a
grudging admiration for talking with apparent fluency about a
topic on which he was hardly an expert, making it sound like
he had skilfully initiated and guided the project, when all
he’d really done was throw the right people at it. Which, of
course, required a talent too, though it wasn’t the one Noble
wanted to display.

Spen handled the more technical questions during the

Q&A, but Noble coped with the rest pretty well, Daniel
having moved to his side to hand up this or that sheet of facts
and figures. They appeared like a well-oiled machine, even
if in reality Noble was the squeaky wheel and the lubricant
was more like Daniel’s blood, sweat...and tears.

At the end Noble sat down, flushed with pleasure at the

applause. Daniel smiled, more relieved than delighted. Spen
understood why—the pressure was off for a little while, and
Noble’s good mood could only be a bonus.

As the room cleared, Noble clapped his hand on Spen’s

arm. “Come for a drink. That went very well.”

“Thanks, but I’m meeting Eastern for drinks and then

dinner. Sorry.”

“Ah, never mind. Daniel? I owe you a glass of something

expensive, I think.”

“Oh, it’s okay—”
“Now, Daniel. You have to let me crow a little. Perks of

the position. I insist.”

Spen wanted to kick the bastard in the knee, but Daniel

gave Noble a sickly smile. “Sure, why not. I’ll see you later,
Spen?”

“I won’t be late. No way can I keep up with Eastern.

Take it easy, Daniel.”

Daniel waved him off, before Noble firmly steered him

in the direction of the hotel bar. At least two other managers
caught up with them, which eased the sudden worry Spen

felt. Noble wouldn’t try anything in front of his colleagues,
and the worst Daniel would suffer would be terminal
boredom. Sorry, kid. Can’t rescue you tonight.

~~~~~~~~

The trick with dealing with Eastern—and Northern, and

Southern and Isles—was not to get into buying rounds, which
was harder than it sounded. The idea of someone quietly
nursing a pint of bitter while the rest were downing tequila
shots and vodka mixes was anathema to twenty excitable,
loud and slightly drunk nerds who could make a lot of noise
when they wanted something. Spen bought a round early,
held up his nearly full glass as an answer to “Do you want
another?” for as long as he could, and ignored extra pints
arriving unwanted by his elbow. He wasn’t the only one
taking it easy—the older veterans of the national conference
had learned their lesson years ago as he had, and since they
were the ones he most wanted to talk to, it was natural
enough to move away from the louder, larger group to chat.

Spen was deep in a raging debate about the merits of

server architecture when he felt his phone vibrate. “Sorry, I
should get this,” he said to his companions. The call was
from his mother. “Hi, Mum. Hang on, I can’t hear you.” He
moved outside and closed the glass door behind. The damp
weather meant he was alone out on the deck. “What’s up?”

“Spencer, Dee’s been trying to call Daniel for half an

hour or more. His phone keeps going to voice mail. Is he

there with you?”

“No, he was having a drink with his boss and some other

people. Supper too, I guess,” he added, looking at the time.
“Let me see if I can track him down and get him to call. He
probably just forgot how late it was.”

“Yes, I’m sure that’s what it was. But the child is

worried and I thought I’d see if I could help.”

“No problems, Mum. I’ll call you back as soon as I find

him.”

The presentation had been over for nearly two hours.

Daniel was either having dinner with Noble or up in their
room. Spen called his mobile, but immediately went through
to voice mail. Daniel never turned off his phone, he said.
Dee or Alex might need him. Was he talking to someone?
For half an hour? Unlikely, but not impossible.

He went back inside the bar and found his friends.

“Sorry, guys. I just need to duck out for a bit. I’ll find you at
the restaurant if you’ve gone by the time I get back, okay?”

He headed back to the hotel. The hotel bar was largely

empty—certainly no Noble or Daniel. The restaurant was
also quiet, and the bistro was closed.

He returned to the bar, and caught the attention of the bar

attendant. “Hi. I’m looking for a friend of mine—young man,
red hair. Would have been with an older man, maybe a few
of them, an hour or so. All guests of the hotel.”

“About twenty, wearing a suit and tie? They all left an

hour ago.”

“Did you notice if they went out or upstairs?”
Her forehead wrinkled in concentration. “Uh, three of the

older men went out the front. The young guy and another
older guy went towards the lifts. I can’t be sure they didn’t
follow the others out though. The toilets are that way too.”

“Thanks.”
“No problem. Did you want a drink?”
“No, I’m fine.”
She nodded and went down the other end of the bar to

empty the glass washer.

Spen bit his lip, thinking. Myko jumped onto the bar and

meeped in distress. Spen patted him. “Where’s Kani, squirt?
Do you know?”

Myko squeaked, jumped down, and ran to the lifts. Did

that mean he thought Kani—and Daniel—were in the hotel?
Spen had nothing else to go on, so he followed his kem and
took the elevator to their floor. He tried their room—empty.
He tried Noble’s mobile—no answer.

Okay, now he was worried.
Myko climbed up onto his shoulder and bit his ear. “Ow!

What did you do that for, you menace?” Myko jumped to the
floor and stamped his foot. “All right, I’m listening. Where?”

Myko ran back to the elevators. Spen followed, confused

as to what his kem wanted. In the elevator car, he picked
Myko up. “Okay, where?” Myko went to bite his finger in

frustration, but Spen yanked it out of the way. “No, you
don’t. Wait.” He held his kem near the buttons for the floors.
“Which one?” Myko nudged the one for the floor above with
his nose. “Noble’s room?” Myko squeaked. “Shit.”

He pressed the button and as soon as the car arrived,

bolted out and down the corridor. Myko ran ahead of him,
squeaking in distress, and at Noble’s door, actually
disappeared through it. Spen banged on the door—no
answer. “Tony? Are you in there?” Still no answer.

Myko reappeared through the door. “He’s not there—”

Spen started to say, but stopped. Behind Myko, a small grey
form appeared. “Kani?”

The little kem squeaked faintly and fell over. Myko

meeped in distress, licking Kani’s face and nudging him.
Spen picked them both up. Kani was conscious, but severely
disoriented.

The only way to do anything to a kem was to hurt its

human. Which meant....

He cuddled the kems with one arm, and used his free

hand to bang on Noble’s door again. “Daniel! Tony! Open
this door!”

No response, even though he kept it up for over a minute.

He turned, intending to look for a manager, only to discover
a manager—and a burly porter—had found him first.

“Sir, you’re disturbing our guests,” the manager said.

Behind her, the big porter flexed his impressive biceps.

“Yeah, too bad. My friend’s in there, and he’s sick. Look

at his kem.” He held Kani out. The lolling head and panting
told the story better than he could. “I know he’s in there, but I
can’t get anyone to open the door. Please—he’s probably
unconscious.”

The manager’s expression changed from annoyance to

concern. “I have a master key. Let me.” She knocked once on
the door. “Sir? If you’re in there....”

The door opened before she had a chance to pull her

keycard out of her pocket. Noble stood there, somewhat
untidily dressed. “Spencer? I was just about to call
someone.”

Spen pushed past him. “Where’s Daniel...shit.” He ran

over to the bed where Daniel lay face down. “Daniel? Wake
up, kid. What the fuck did you do to him, Noble?”

“Nothing—don’t be ridiculous. I was just about to call an

ambulance. He turned up ten minutes ago in a confused state,
said he felt unwell, so I let him lie down since he wasn’t in a
fit state to return to his room. I only realised he wasn’t
simply asleep a minute or so ago when you knocked.”

Spen didn’t believe a word of it, but it wasn’t important

right now. “Call an ambulance, now,” he snapped at the two
hotel staff, then he turned Daniel into the recovery position.
He was breathing, albeit slowly, and his pulse was also
rather slow. He was also much paler than normal, which
meant he looked practically transparent, and Myko’s worried

squeaks and Kani’s condition confirmed that this wasn’t
right. “Hurry!”

The porter went to the room phone. The manager called

someone on her mobile. Noble went outside. Spen ignored
them all, concentrating on Daniel. He didn’t seem to have
any injury, and was dressed, though his shirt was untucked
and misbuttoned, and his fly wasn’t fully closed. He also
smelled of something that Spen found familiar but couldn’t
place. “What happened to you?” Spen murmured, brushing
his hand through Daniel’s fine red hair. “Where’s the
ambulance?”

The porter answered. “Coming, sir. Let me have a look—

I’m a first aider.”

So was Spen, but it never hurt to have a second opinion.

While the porter checked Daniel over, Spen turned to the
manager. “Where did Noble—that guest—go?”

“Uh, I don’t know. Outside somewhere. Where is

Daniel’s room?”

“It’s mine,” he said and gave the room number. “I’m

Spencer Reardon, his colleague and his emergency contact at
the moment, as his family are staying with my parents.”

“Then you should go with him to the hospital. I’ll arrange

that when the ambulance gets here.”

The paramedics arrived five minutes later and attached a

scary number of leads to a still unconscious Daniel. “Has he
been drinking?” one of them asked while he fastened a blood

pressure cuff to Daniel’s arm.

“Yes, but not to excess that I know of. His boss was with

him, and some other managers. He wouldn't get drunk in front
of them.” And just where the fuck was Noble now? “His kem
is acting weird too.”

Spen held Kani out so the paramedic could take a long

look. “That’s not alcohol,” he said, though he didn’t say what
else it was likely to be. Spen could guess though. He looked
around the room. Everything was tidy—no cups or bottles,
not even in the trash. Had Daniel ingested something in the
bar?

The paramedics put Daniel on oxygen and inserted an IV

port, before loading him onto a gurney. “We’ll be taking him
to Central,” the other paramedic said. “Is anyone going to
come there with him?”

“Me,” Spen said. “I’ll follow.”
“A taxi should be waiting downstairs, Mr Reardon,” the

manager said.

“We’ll let them know at the hospital,” the paramedic told

Spen.

The paramedics rolled Daniel out. Kani gave a faint

squeak and disappeared. Spen had never seen a kem in that
state before and didn’t like what that might mean for Daniel.
“I’ll head off now,” he told the manager, “but if Tony Noble
returns, can someone ask him more about what happened this
evening? And could you ask the bar staff if Daniel seemed

drowsy or ill to them? This is my number.” He handed the
manager his card. “If his family calls, can you ask them to
call me instead? I don’t want them getting bad news without
an explanation.”

“Certainly, Mr Reardon. Leave it to us. Jim, please

escort him downstairs and make sure the taxi’s there.”

The porter went with him to the lift, and whistled up the

taxi to pick Spen up from the front door. “Hope your friend
is all right, sir.”

“Thanks.”
With nothing to distract him from the worry, his thoughts

raced through some distinctly horrible possibilities. What if
Daniel was seriously ill? What if he died? What had
happened in the hotel room, and why had Noble taken such a
long time to answer the door? Spen now wished he’d asked
the manager to call the police as well, but on what basis?
Now Noble had plenty of time to dispose of any evidence, if
there was any to dispose of.

But maybe Daniel had just reacted badly to a couple of

strong drinks. It wasn’t impossible, or even all that unlikely
considering he didn’t drink much. Spen hoped for Daniel’s
sake that this was the explanation. The alternatives were
horrifying.

He remembered his promise to call his mother, and rang

the house. “Did you find him, love?”

“Yes, Mum. Is Dee there?”

“No, in her room. Shall I fetch her?”
“No, no...Mum, we’re taking Daniel to hospital. I found

him unconscious in his boss’s room.”

“Oh my lord. What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know, but I don’t want you to tell Dee either. Not

yet. Could you tell her that Daniel’s been taken ill, and he’s
asleep. I’ll call her in the morning with an update. I should
know more then.”

“I don’t like lying to the children, Spencer.”
“I know, but do you want her getting hysterical with

worry when there’s nothing she can do? Look...just say he’s
unwell. That’s no lie. I don’t think he’s in serious danger. At
least, I hope not. There’s nothing she can do there for him.”

“All right, I’ll do that. That poor boy. What could it be?”
“I don’t know. I’ll call tomorrow when I do know. Dee

can call me if she needs to, but Mum, please try and keep her
calm.”

“Don’t tell me how to mother a child, love.” Spen smiled

a little. “Are you all right, Spencer? This must be a shock.”

“I’m trying to concentrate on what needs to be done. I’m

just glad I found him sooner rather than later. You and Dee
might have saved his life.”

His mother gasped. “I don’t know what Dee and Alex

will do if anything happens to Daniel.”

“Well, then, we won’t let anything happen. Don’t worry

too much, Mum. I’ll handle it here.”

“Good night, love. He’s in good hands with you.”
If that had been true, Daniel wouldn’t have been struck

down in the first place. Still, recriminations could wait until
he had his hands around Tony Noble’s cowardly neck.

The taxi dropped him at the Emergency entrance, and

when he enquired at Reception, he discovered he was only
behind the ambulance by a couple of minutes. “He’s still
being assessed,” the clerk told him. “Take a seat and you’ll
be called. Are you family?”

Spen had given this some thought on the ride over, and

answered calmly, “He’s my boyfriend. His parents are dead
and his siblings are both minors. They’re staying with my
family at the moment.”

The clerk made a note and didn’t comment. Spen figured

it was the kind of statement no one was likely to argue with,
unlike claiming to be a brother—unlikely, given their
decided lack of resemblance to each other—or a spouse,
which he couldn’t backup. Daniel would understand, and it
made things easier without needing to drag Dee into this, or
worse, Daniel’s elderly and infirm grandparents.

Myko wouldn’t settle, meeping and moving restlessly

from Spen’s lap to the floor and back again. He didn’t
wander far, not even to talk to the other kems in the waiting
room. Spen gave him what comfort he could, which wasn’t
much, and took what he could from Myko’s company.

He waited nearly an hour before his name was called,

and he was ushered through the doors separating the waiting
room from the treatment cubicles. He asked where Daniel
was but before he could go where he’d been directed, a
young doctor came up to him. “I’m Dr Ali. Are you here for
Daniel Walkinshaw?”

“Yes. I’m Spencer Reardon. How is he?”
“Stable for now. I need to talk to you, Spencer. Come this

way.”

She took him away from the nurse’s station. “Are you

close to Daniel?”

“Pretty close, yes.”
“Do you know what happened this evening? What he ate,

or drank?”

“Not exactly, no. I was with work colleagues. He was in

the bar with his boss and other managers. I don’t think he ate
anything down there, but I don’t know what happened after
he and his boss returned to his boss’s room.”

“So he was drinking?”
“I believe so. That was the intention. He’s not a big

drinker at all. Is it just alcohol?”

She grimaced. “I don’t think so, but without knowing

what he ingested, it’s hard to say. Does he take drugs?”

“No.” Spen didn’t have any proof of that other than his

knowledge of Daniel as a person, but he was as sure of that
as he was of his own sobriety. “Has he been drugged?”

“We suspect he’s taken something.”

“Or been given it.”
“Possibly. Where’s his boss? Is he ill too?”
“I don’t know where he is, and no. He was fine. Claims

Daniel turned up at his room, and fell asleep on his bed. I
don’t believe him, for what it’s worth.”

“Hmmm. There’s signs of Daniel having had anal sex as

the receptive partner very recently. Would that be with you?”

Spen’s hands curled into fists. “No,” he said tightly.

“And I can assure you that having sex with his boss is the
last thing he would do. He doesn’t like him. We should call
the police, doctor.”

“Yes, I agree, and we can do that when he wakes up. But

Daniel’s still unconscious, and the drug tests won’t
necessarily be conclusive. If Daniel can’t remember what
happened this evening, as is likely, then the police won’t be
able to prove he didn’t take something voluntarily, or have
sex involuntarily. There’s no physical evidence of force.”

Spen felt sick. Noble, I’ll kill you with my bare hands.

“Can I see him?”

“Yes. At this point, we’ll keep him in here until he wakes

up and is normal again. That will probably be a few hours.
You can take him home then, provided someone keeps an eye
on him. He’s likely to feel fairly sorry for himself, just
warning you.”

“I won’t let him out of my sight, I swear.”
She smiled. “Good. Through here.”

Daniel lay on his side wearing a hospital gown and

covered with a sheet. He still wore the oxygen mask and was
attached to a machine monitoring his blood pressure and
heart rate. Spen sat by him and took his hand. Daniel didn’t
move. His hand was very cold, and his breathing still slow.
“Oh Danny, Danny, you’re a worry.” Spen stroked his pale
cheek. “Kani, where are you, squirt?”

Daniel’s kem popped out and crawled slowly onto

Daniel’s shoulder, wobbling back and forth, though looking a
little more alert than before. Myko pulled him down onto the
bed in front of Daniel’s head and began to delicately groom
his woozy friend. Spen stroked them both, wishing Myko’s
attentions to Kani would somehow stimulate Daniel to
consciousness. But Daniel didn’t wake or even twitch. Spen
settled in to wait, keeping hold of Daniel’s hand, determined
to not to leave his side for a second.

Nearly two hours later, Daniel roused fully, blinking

green eyes open and staring uncomprehendingly at Spen.
“Hey. How do you feel?”

“‘m I?”
“Hospital. What do you remember?”
“‘bout what?”
“Having drinks with Tony?”
“Um...I don’t.” He struggled to sit up, but even with

Spen’s help, it was beyond him. He sank back down. “Feel
crap.”

“I know. Just going to find the doctor.” Daniel’s hand

gripped Spen’s and his green eyes widened in panic. “It’s
okay. Myko’s here. Back in a minute, I promise.” He gave
Daniel’s hand a pat. “Promise.”

Daniel let go. Myko licked his face, and Kani, now much

brighter and with it, cuddled against his chest. Daniel gave
his kem a dozy pat. “Don’t understand,” he mumbled.

“I know. Just wait.”
Dr Ali was attending to another patient, but Spen caught

her eye and she came out to see him. “He’s awake. He
doesn’t remember anything. Not yet.”

“I’m not surprised. The tox results show almost no blood

alcohol content, but GHB is present.”

That was an acronym Spen hadn’t heard since his student

days. “The date rape drug?”

“One of them, yes. Doesn’t prove how it got into him,

though. I’ll just go and speak to him. Would you like to wait
out here?”

Spen hovered outside the cubicle, while the doctor spoke

quietly to Daniel. He tried not to eavesdrop but it was hard
not to get most of it, and understand that Daniel was adamant
that he didn’t want the police involved, and he refused to
consent to a rape kit. When the doctor came out, she
shrugged at Spen. “Can’t say I’m surprised.”

“But you’ll keep the drug results on record?”
“Yes. But the police won’t attend unless he makes a

complaint. If he changes his mind, he can contact them at any
time.”

“Can he go home?”
“I’d rather he stayed an hour or two but he’s determined

to leave. GHB leaves the body fairly fast so he’ll probably
be all right. You’ll stay with him?”

“Yes, and get him back here if he seems to be worse.”
“Then he can leave.” She went to the nurses’ station and

picked up a leaflet, which she handed to Spen. “He might
need this.”

Spen looked at it. “Rape counselling?”
“It’s likely, yes.” She looked up at him. “Take it easy

with him, Spencer.”

“I will.”
She nodded and went off to another cubicle. Spen stared

at the leaflet then shoved it into his pocket with a shudder.
Someone had assaulted Daniel tonight. More than assaulted.
The police should be involved.

Inside the cubicle, Daniel, now detached from his leads

and the oxygen, was making a fairly futile attempt to get
dressed.

“The doctor thought you should hang around for a little

bit, Daniel.”

“I’m fine. I just want to get out of here. Help me, will

you?”

Spen helped him into his trousers and shirt. Trying to

identity the odd smell on them was driving him nuts.

“Where are my shoes?”
“Here, don’t panic.” He bent to help Daniel put them on.

“You should really speak to the police.”

The foot jerked out of Spen’s grip. Spen looked up and

found its owner glaring at him. “No. Not now, not ever. I
won’t get my family into more crap.”

“Daniel, someone drugged you.”
“Maybe. But I’m fine and I don’t want to think about this

any more. I’ve got a headache, I’m tired, and you know as
well as I do the police won’t be able to do a damn thing. I’ll
end up spending hours at a police station for no reason.”

“What about stopping whoever it was doing it again?”

Spen ached to mention Noble by name but he didn’t want to
contaminate Daniel’s evidence, if he did manage to convince
him to make a complaint.

“We don’t know who it was, and I can’t give them

anything to find him. I just want to get out of here. You
haven’t spoken to Dee, have you?”

“No. I asked Mum to let her know you were unwell, but

not to worry. You can call her in the morning.”

Daniel sagged. “Thanks. Look...I know what you’re

saying, and why. But I can’t. I just can’t. It’s too much. I
haven’t got the energy to deal with this on top of the rest.”

“Okay.” Spen finished with the shoes, and helped Daniel

stand. Daniel picked up Kani, who squeaked and licked him.

“Whatever it was, made him sick too.”

“Sorry,” Daniel said to his kem, kissing his head. He

looked up at Spen. “You found me?”

“Good thing too. It was really Myko and Kani.”
“Right.” Daniel ran out of determination around about

then, and sat back on the bed. “I really do feel like crap.”

“You can stay—”
“Please? Can we just...go?”
“Sure. Here.”
He took his hand and helped him up again. Daniel held

his hand longer than he needed to. “Thank you.”

“Any time.” He put his hand on Daniel’s shoulder.

“Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

Chapter 9

Daniel leaned on the taxi’s window, not really seeing the

passing scenery. Spen’s face was reflected in the glass, so
Daniel knew he was being watched. Not surprising Spen
was worried. Daniel wanted to be alone, but he couldn’t
bring himself to wish Spen wasn’t there.

His stomach churned and his head throbbed. He still felt

out of it, unsettled. Nothing like being drunk or hungover.
Someone had drugged him. Someone had had sex with him,
the doctor said. He knew what those two things added up to,
but he couldn’t make himself admit it in so many words.

“Where did you find me?” He immediately regretted

asking.

“In Tony’s room. On his bed. He said you turned up in a

confused state.”

Daniel’s stomach heaved and he covered his mouth. He

couldn’t ask the next question. He was afraid Spen would
answer it.

“Do you need to throw up?” Spen asked.
“No. Leave me alone, please.”
“Sure.”
Kani sat in Daniel’s lap, meeping quietly from time to

time. Daniel should try and comfort the little guy but he
couldn’t find the energy. Oh god, how was he going to tell
Dee? He couldn’t. He’d have to lie. But first, he had to pull
himself together.

The hotel was deserted, thankfully. He didn’t know what

he’d do if he ran into one of the managers. Or Tony. How
was he supposed to....

Was this where he had to give up? How could he work

for someone who...but he didn’t know that Tony had. Why
would Tony take such a risk here, among his peers and
superiors? Tony was married. Maybe it was nothing like it
looked at all.

Spen guided him up to their room, and locked the door

behind them. “I’m taking you home in the morning. I’ll email
Noble and whoever needs to know that our presentation is
cancelled because of illness.”

“I can’t—”
Spen took him by the arms and made Daniel look at him.

“You’re in no state, and I refuse to do this while you’re in
this condition. No argument, Daniel.”

Daniel shook him off. “All right,” he said irritably. “But

I’m fine.”

“You’re a crime victim.”
“I’m not a victim. I won’t be. I refuse to be involved in

this. All I want to do is do my job, look after Dee and Alex,
sort out our messes without anything else. Do you
understand?”

“Yes, but I don’t agree.”
“Tough. It’s not your life, not your decision. Leave me

alone.”

Spen stepped back. “Whatever you want, kid.”
“And stop calling me that. Maybe if you realised I’m as

adult as you, you wouldn’t be trying to nanny me.”

“I’d do this for anyone in your situation.”
“There is no situation. I’m going to use the loo.”
Nausea washed over him as he fled into the bathroom, so

he sat on the closed toilet lid and held his head in his hands.
He had to get his act together here. If he couldn’t convince
Spen he was all right, he’d never convince Dee and Alex.
How would he explain coming home early? Maybe the best
thing was not to tell them...but if they came back from Mrs
Reardon’s house for some reason, they’d discover the lie.
He’d have to come up with something.

What a bloody mess.
Kani crawled up onto his lap and meeped into his face.

Daniel stroked his back right down to the tail, the way he
liked. “I’m sorry, kiddo.” Kani squirmed closer and Daniel
held him tight. “Help me. I need to be strong.”

Kani wasn’t enough though. Daniel had to find it from

inside, somehow, but he didn’t know how much he had left.

~~~~~~~~

Spen sent a short, barely civil email to Noble, and a

more polite one to his line manager regarding the cancelled
presentation. He didn’t much care whose noses were put out
of joint, and would be delighted if Noble was annoyed. The
creep hadn’t even called to find out how Daniel was. Not

that Spen had any intention of telling him what they really
knew. He also sent emails to Jyoti and Julian, because
Daniel might be feeling disinclined to pursue the criminal
angle right now, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t change his
mind. Or be persuaded to.

Daniel was taking a long time in the bathroom. Spen tried

not to worry but finally gave in. He knocked on the door.
“You okay in there?”

“Leave me alone.”
Spen shook his head and sat down again. If Daniel was

cranky, at least that meant he was alive. Myko squeaked and
shoved his nose under Spen’s hand. Spen put him on the
floor. “You go keep an eye on him, squirt. Let me know if
he’s in trouble.” Myko ran off and disappeared through the
closed bathroom door.

What could he do for the kid? He understood Daniel’s

objections to talking to the police—hell, gay men got a hard
enough time normally, and rape cases weren’t taken half as
seriously as they should be, no matter what sex the victim
was. But if the police talked to Noble....

There was no proof. Just Noble’s word against a drug

test, and proof that Daniel had had sex. Even though Spen
would bet all his savings that Daniel would never go out
looking for quick, anonymous sex, or take drugs like GHB,
he couldn’t prove he hadn’t.

So how could he help? Should he give Daniel that leaflet

on counselling? Should he recruit his mother to help? Or
should he let Daniel live in denial, if that helped him cope
with all the stress his life held?

Finally the bathroom door opened. The kems raced out

ahead of Daniel. “All yours.” His sullen expression didn’t
do much for him, but the improved colour did.

“I won’t be long.”
“Whatever. I’m going to sleep.”
“Look, I’m on your side, you know. I just don’t know

what to do.”

Daniel sat on his bed and looked up. “I’m sorry. I

feel...like I could fly into a million pieces if I’m not careful.
If you push me too hard. I have to hold it all together.”

Spen sat on the bed next to him. “You don’t have to do it

alone.”

“I do. There’s only me. I can’t ask Dee and Alex to

help.”

“Maybe, maybe not. But I’m here. I won’t go away, and I

won’t let you down. Just let me be there, even if you don’t
think you need me.”

Daniel’s green eyes shone with tears. “I’m scared,” he

whispered. “I can’t fail.”

“You won’t. We won’t let you.” Spen patted his

shoulder, wanting to hug him but not wanting to violate
Daniel’s space right now. “Are you hungry? Do you want
coffee, or water? Anything?”

“No. Just sleep. You know I could do this presentation

just fine.”

“Too late, already cancelled. You and I are checking out

tomorrow morning and you’re going back home because you
shouldn’t have been here in the first place.”

“What will I tell Dee and Alex?”
“We’ll work something out.” Spen gave him a gentle

shove. “Hop into bed. I’m going to get Myko to keep an eye
on you in case you relapse or something.”

“I’m fine.” The crankiness was back.
“Good. Bed.”
He waited until Daniel was under the covers, then he

turned the room light down and set Myko on the end of the
bed. “You know what to do,” he whispered. Myko chirped
and ran up to sit on Daniel’s chest next to Kani.

“Great, now how am I supposed to sleep?” Daniel

groused, glaring at the kems looking back at him with bright-
eyed enthusiasm.

“Carefully,” Spen said, and grinned at the scowl.

Anything was better than sullen depression.

~~~~~~~~

Their journey back on the train was largely a silent one.

Daniel let Spen deal with checking out, and they’d avoided
any contact with any of the conference attendees. Noble had
responded to Spen’s email with one that was even less
diplomatic, saying that he was disappointed in the

cancellation and that he expected Daniel back at work the
following Monday. Not a word of concern, the bastard—but
at least he’d spared Spen the hypocrisy.

Daniel texted his sister to say he was fine, had just been

unwell and was coming home early. Spen suggested that he
ask the kids to stay one more night with his mum, to give
Daniel a chance to get his balance, but he refused. “It’s their
home, and I’m fine.”

Spen gave up on that line, but he insisted on calling the

office to remove the redirect from Noble’s line to Daniel’s
mobile, and actually took the phone off him to stop him
answering anything other than calls from his brother and
sister. Daniel put up surprisingly little fight. After the brief
burst of determination over Dee and Alex, he’d slid back
into apathy, paying little attention to the journey, Spen, or
even Kani. He’d eaten very little breakfast, and refused tea
from the train’s galley. Spen wondered if he was afraid of
being drugged again. Maybe his stomach was still upset.
Asking was more than he dared do, seeing the faraway look
in Daniel’s eyes as he stared through the dirty glass out to the
rain-sodden railway cutting.

When they arrived, Daniel looked at Spen in surprise as

he climbed into the taxi with him. “I’m coming with you,”
Spen said.

“Why?”
“Because.”

Daniel shrugged, and gave the driver the address.
He finally roused to question Spen’s actions once he’d

unlocked his front door and set his bags down. “I’m okay
now. You should go home.”

“House is empty until Mum gets home. I thought I’d keep

you company until the kids come back from school.”

Daniel frowned. “Why?”
“Do you want to be alone?”
Daniel opened his mouth, then closed it. “No,” he said in

a small voice. “But I shouldn’t impose.”

“You didn’t. I offered. Is there anything to eat? I’m

starving.”

Daniel sat in the kitchen and watched Spen as he rooted

around looking for edibles. The fridge was bare, since they
house was supposed to be empty for a week, but he found a
tin of soup, and that with toasted bread from the freezer, a
pot of tea and some biscuits, made a warming if not
particularly healthy meal. Spen watched Daniel’s colour
improve with every mouthful, and concluded at least some of
his bad mood was down to low blood sugar.

“Feeling better?” he asked as he collected the dishes to

dump in the sink.

“Yes. Thank you. Spen...I’m sorry for being such an

arsehole.”

“You need to try harder. I didn’t even notice. You forget

who I work with.” That raised a smile. “What do you want to

do now?”

“Um...I should do some shopping. You don’t want to do

that with me.”

“Try me.”
“Don’t you have anything better to do?”
“Nope. I’m on leave until Monday. Besides, I never get

to shop properly any more since I moved back home.”

Daniel looked like he was about to tell Spen that was the

most ridiculous statement since the Big Bang, but the words
never actually came out. Instead he shrugged. “If you really
want to.”

The rain had stopped but it was still cold and windy, so

people crowded into the shops. Weaving around damp,
cranky people wasn’t Spen’s idea of fun, but Daniel seemed
to barely notice, filling his trolley methodically, checking
unit prices and always choosing discounted or sale items.
Spen hadn’t had to do that since he was a student—his salary
and living rent-free with Rob had spared him from having to
watch his budget too carefully. Daniel might have been doing
it out of habit, but then he wouldn’t be working for a wanker
like Noble if the family finances were secure.

Myko and Kani thought the shop was a playground set up

for their pleasure, and chased each other along the shelves,
weaving in and out of the cans and bottles with breathtaking
heedlessness. Myko was normally pretty well-behaved in
shops, but Spen saw Daniel’s smile at their antics, and

carefully did nothing to rein in his naughty kem. Myko and
Kani were trying to help—and it was working.

Daniel reached for a packet of discounted cheese. “I

thought I’d make a couple of dishes to freeze this afternoon,
maybe roast a chicken for supper.”

“You cook?”
“Yeah, we all do. Mum insisted. I like it. Made life

easier at Uni.” His mouth turned down. “Dee does most of it
now, but I try and make up for it at the weekends.”

“Mum does the cooking at home. I can cook but she

enjoys it. I do the heavier housework, washing and
vacuuming, that kind of thing.”

“Ooh, where can I find your twin? I wish we had an extra

pair of hands. Dad—”

He stopped. Kani meeped and ran over to him, jumping

up to his left shoulder. Spen put his hand on Daniel’s right,
but didn’t know what to say. All he could do, after a few
seconds, was to gently nudge him to carry on, which Daniel
did, walking along in silence, picking out items with the
same concentration as before. The kems no longer made him
smile.

With the trolley loaded, they headed for the checkouts,

only to find long queues everywhere. Daniel appeared
resigned to it, but Spen found it almost intolerable. “We’ll
get there eventually. Stop fidgeting.”

“But it’s boooring,” Spen whined, just to make Daniel

roll his eyes.

“And you call me a kid...Kani, what’s wrong?”
On his shoulder, Daniel’s kem stood on his back paws,

his fur erect, snarling. Myko turned to look where Kani was
pointing, and likewise bristled and snarled. “What the hell?”
Spen said. “They’re just looking at mineral water.” The only
offensive thing he could see about the green bottles was the
price, since it was that fancy, rather salty, fizzy stuff that
restaurants like to serve. There had been smaller versions in
the hotel mini-bar, but like everything else in the mini-bar,
they cost about three times what they would from the
supermarket.

Myko squeaked and nipped Spen’s ear. “Ow, you little

bugger.”

“Kani, stop it.” But when Daniel lifted him down, Kani

squirmed free and jumped onto the display of bottles, hissing
and spitting. People were starting to stare at him.

“What’s wrong with you two? Why would you—” Spen

stopped. Daniel’s widening eyes registered his realisation at
the same time Spen came to it. “Oh God. Kani knows. It was
in—”

Daniel turned his back on the kems and the display. “I’m

not talking about it,” he gritted out. “Look, go home, leave
me to deal with this.”

“No way. At least let’s get this to your house before you

go postal.”

Daniel glared. “You’re more upset than I am.”
“Yeah, right.”
Daniel pursed his lips and concentrated on dumping his

groceries out onto the conveyor belt. Spen helped pack while
ignoring the dirty looks. It was pure defence on Daniel’s
part.

Over Daniel’s objections he paid for a taxi back to the

house, and helped carry the bags into the house. “Thank
you,” Daniel said, sounding anything but grateful. “Maybe
you should go now.”

“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why do you want me to leave?”
“Because....”
“Because I might talk to you about why Kani and Myko

freaked out about bottles of mineral water?”

Daniel grabbed the bag with the cold goods and stomped

into the kitchen. Spen hefted the rest and lugged them in
behind. He found Daniel hurling stuff into the fridge. “Slow
down, squirt. Don’t break something because you’re pissed
off with me.”

“I’m not.” The cheese hit a shelf with a resounding thud.
“Then who are you mad at?”
“No one. Me. Just...no one.”
“Not even the person who drugged and raped you?”
Daniel stiffened. “I don’t—”

“Want to talk about it. Okay. Then don’t. But you can’t

make it not have happened. So either face it, or face your
brain ambushing you all the time.” He pulled the leaflet out
of his pocket. “The doctor at the hospital gave me this.”

He laid it on the countertop. Daniel moved back from it

like it was a bomb with the counter down to ten seconds. “I
don’t need that.”

“You need something. You can’t live in denial forever.”
“Just watch me. If you’re going to lecture me, please go,

Spen. Otherwise, you’re welcome to stay and help me cook.
That’s as much entertainment as I can offer, sorry.”

“Well, since you’ve made such a tempting offer, I’ll stay.

What do you want me to do?”

Daniel flicked a finger at the leaflet. “Throw that away

for a start.” Spen put it in his pocket without protesting. “I
need a stack of cheese grated. Feel like doing that?”

“I’m the world’s best cheese grater. Let me at it.”
Daniel sighed in exasperation. “Don’t you ever get

annoyed?”

“Why, do you want to see it?”
Daniel went to the fridge, pulled out the cheese, and

found the grater and a bowl. “Stop when you’re fed up or run
out of cheese. Or you decide you’ve got better things to do
than babysit me.”

“Try harder, squirt, if you’re trying to see what I look

like pissed off.” Spen counted it a victory that Daniel

bothered to flip him off, before returning to the bags of
groceries for his cooking supplies.

Despite that unpromising beginning, the afternoon went

peacefully. Once finished with the cheese, Spen was set to
cutting up carrots and onions, and washing up dishes and
pans to keep the volume down. Daniel worked like a demon,
cooking up mountains of mince for lasagne, cottage pie, and
to put on toast with baked beans. “You certainly know how
to stretch your budget,” Spen said, calculating that Daniel
had made at least half a dozen meals out of what many
people would spend on one.

“Something else Mum taught us. She said we would need

to save our money for important things when we left home. I
guess she never figured it would be because she died.”

“Are you really that badly off?”
“No. But there’s no income coming in other than what I

make, and there’ll be a lot of expenses soon. Already are.
Having a salary gives us a cushion. It’s the difference
between mince and beans, and chicken and fish occasionally.
I don’t want Dee and Alex to go without, or miss out on any
chances because we haven’t got the money. Mum and Dad
worked hard to provide for us, and wanted us all to go to
University.”

“But now you’re not.”
“No. Not at the moment.”
Spen wiped his hands. “Daniel, try not to get angry with

me—but maybe you should consider not going back to work
on Monday. Tony’s not doing right by you, regardless of
what happened last night.”

Despite the plea, Daniel’s jaw set hard. “You can’t

prove he did anything. I don’t think he did. Why the hell
would he? Why there, for God’s sake? It’s the riskiest place
possible.”

Spen had to admit he had a point. “You were only there

because he forced you to be—against company regulations.
You could do so much better.”

“Not now I can’t. Give me two more months. That’ll be

nearly six months that I’ve been there, and I can look around
for more office work with that experience.”

But you shouldn’t be getting that experience. You’re an

engineer, damn it . Spen didn’t say it out loud. There was no
point...yet. “Noball’s a terrible boss.”

“Yes. I know that. He’s not the worst thing I’ve had to put

up with by a long way. I’ll be fine.”

“I’d like to see you happier, that’s all.”
Daniel laid his knife down and stared at Spen. “Why?

Why take so much interest in me? You don’t do this to Luke
or Jyoti or anyone else who works with you.”

“Because I like you. I’d like to be friends. And I think

you need a friend.”

“Spare me.”
“You’re a hard sell, Daniel. Do I annoy you so much?”

Daniel flushed. “No,” he muttered. “I don’t like pity,

that’s all.”

“It’s not pity. It’s...hell, can’t a guy want to be your

friend?”

“You’ve got friends. And a family.”
“So? Is there a quota? Maybe I’m short a redhead and I

need to make up the set.”

“That’s better than feeling sorry for me.”
“I do not feel sorry for you. I worry about you. It’s

different. I like you and I don’t want to see you hurt and I
don’t like to know that friends of mine are being attacked
when they should be safe. It wouldn’t matter if you were
Jyoti or Luke or anyone else. I can’t help wanting to help. I
get it from Mum.”

The first smile in hours crossed Daniel’s face. “She’s

wonderful. They both are. I’m so jealous it makes me sick,
and then I feel bad because I had wonderful parents too. I
was just as lucky...for a while.”

“Still are, if you’re in good shape because of their

planning. Because of the man they made you.”

“Yeah. Um...I don’t really want to talk about....”
“I know. Is that lasagne ready?”
Daniel cleared his throat. “Uh, ten minutes. I’m done

now. The kids should be home in an hour.”

“Then time for a cup of tea, and even a biscuit. Mum’s

cure for everything.”

~~~~~~~~

Daniel was ashamed to admit to himself how grateful he

was to Spen for hanging around until Dee and Alex came
home, and helping him dodge difficult questions about why
they’d both come back early. Spen made it all sound
perfectly routine, and reassured Dee that Daniel hadn’t put
his job at risk at all. Which might not be true, but she
believed it.

Watching Spen climb into a taxi to go home hurt more

than he would have guessed. With Spen, he could feel
something other than lost and rather scared. Spen made him
angry, made him laugh, exasperated him. Without him, the
clouds descended again. Dee noticed immediately. “Are you
still not feeling okay, Daniel?”

“No, I’m not. Sorry. In fact, if you guys don’t mind

serving yourselves, I think I’ll head to bed early. I’m
exhausted.”

“Maybe you should see a doctor.”
“I did, and it’s nothing to worry about. Just a reaction to

something I ate or drank. A good night’s sleep would help.”

She kissed his cheek. “Yes. I could make you a boiled

egg?”

“No, I’m okay. I’ll drink some milk.” He made himself

straighten up. “Did you have a good time at Mrs Reardon’s?”

“Oh yes. She’s really nice. She makes me miss Mum

even more, though.”

He patted her arm. “Yeah, I know what you mean. See

you in the morning.”

He hadn’t lied to Dee. He could barely keep his eyes

open—until he lay down. Then sleep fled from him, leaving
him rolling from side to side, willing his eyes to grow heavy
and his mind to empty without success. Downstairs he heard
the quiet bumps and clunks of his brother and sister having
supper, arguing briefly, then ascending the stairs to use the
bathroom and go to their respective bedrooms. From Alex’s
room came the occasional beeps and bells from his laptop,
from Dee’s, the sounds of her typing furiously. Nice
reassuring sounds, none loud enough to keep him awake. And
yet he couldn't sleep.

Kani was infected by the same restlessness, roaming up

and down the bed, occasionally jumping to the floor and
giving a miserable squeak. He missed Myko, Daniel
guessed, though why he didn’t go and play with Veen or Lili,
Daniel didn’t know.

He turned over again. Unbidden, the memory of the

leaflet Spen had placed on the kitchen counter came to him.
Then that of Kani hissing at the bottles of mineral water. He
covered his eyes with his arm. It wasn’t that they stirred
other memories in his brain. It was that they exposed the
horrifying nothingness between sitting in the bar, sipping
wine with Tony and the other managers, and waking up in the
hospital and seeing Spen’s concerned expression. The line

was sharp. On one side, he could remember quite a lot of
things—how nervous and uncomfortable he’d felt, how the
wine was crap, and feeling amazed at how fast the others
were drinking whisky. On the other, there was nothing. There
was an...absence. He knew something was missing, like
seeing a hole, but having no idea what it had looked like
before the hole was there.

He knew what the missing memories had to be about, but

he couldn’t make himself fill in the gaps, put the visuals
together. He literally had nothing to reference. He didn’t
know why this had happened to him, or who had done it to
him. Or what, exactly, they had done.

Spen wanted him to face up to it. But if in facing up to it,

those missing visuals made it all so much more horrific,
would he be any better off? He didn’t think so. He didn’t see
any point in forcing himself to see himself as a victim, to
imagine in details what had been done. Better to keep it off
in the distance, as if it had happened to someone else.
Regrettable, awful, but not something that touched him
personally. Not something like that visit from the police,
telling him the world as he had known it for twenty-one
years, was over for good. He remembered every second of
that day, and the days afterwards, in perfect, gut-churning
detail. He wished he could forget them. He never would. He
didn’t want more memories like that in his head, not even by
proxy.

The quiet noises in the house stopped. His bedside clock

told him it was eleven. Normally he would be soundly
asleep by now. He’d never felt more awake, yet too tired to
get out of bed and find something to do. If only Spen was—

No. He couldn't go there either. What was the chance

Spen would ever view him as a competent adult now,
especially with him resisting Daniel’s every attempt to resist
victimhood? Obviously seeing Daniel as anything but
pitiable didn’t fit Spen’s internal narrative. Too bad Daniel
wanted him more than ever now. Like his parents coming
back from the dead, Spen was something Daniel could never
have.

From the end of the bed, Kani mewed pitifully. “Come

here, kid,” Daniel whispered. His kem picked his way
delicately up Daniel’s body, and nestled under his chin.
Kani’s warmth was soothing, and if it wasn’t the same as
being held by someone, it was much better than being alone
and lost. He stroked Kani gently and was rewarded by quiet
trilling. The vibrations soothed him, gave himself something
to concentrate on other than the hole in his memories.
Somewhere along the line, he finally fell asleep.

Chapter 10

“Well, Daniel, are you now completely recovered from

your overindulgence?” Tony took his glasses off. “Please sit
down.”

Daniel obeyed, glad to be able to hide his shaking knees.

“Yes, I’m fine,” he muttered, not able to meet Tony’s eyes.

“Good. It was quite disappointing to have to tell people

that the seminar was cancelled. It left quite a gap in their
knowledge.”

“I’m sorry.”
“Yes, I believe that. Such a shame to spoil such a

satisfactory work performance up to then by getting carried
away with alcohol.”

“It wasn’t—” Daniel stopped. Admitting it was drugs—

however administered—sounded much worse. “Um, it was
probably something I ate.”

“Ah. Well, I suppose that’s something we could all fall

prey to. However, we still need to fill that information gap,
and quickly. So I expect you and Spencer to turn your
presentation into a detailed handout by the end of this week,
and you and I will attend the meeting of Northern’s managers
at the end of this month to give them the final rundown. It’ll
be an overnight trip on the twenty-eighth, with the meeting in
the morning next day. Make your arrangements as you need
to.”

“Yes,” Daniel mumbled.

“A lot rides on this, Daniel. National roll out is expected

to be underway by the end of the year, beginning with
Northern. I depend on your support, and if you don’t feel
you’re up to it, then I’ll have to find someone who can give it
to me.”

Daniel swallowed. “No, I can do it. I just ate something

that made me sick.”

“Very well. There’s a backlog of messages to attend to,

and I want the Underwood file. That needs to be followed
up.”

“Yes, Tony.”
Back at his desk, Daniel stared at the list of emails but

didn’t really register them. He hadn’t expect this hostility
from Tony, though maybe it wasn’t surprising since he must
have lost a bit of face when Spen had cancelled with so little
warning. Daniel had tried so hard to be the model employee,
to give more than expected at every turn, but now his job
was threatened by something that wasn’t his fault and he had
no control over. A wave of anger rushed through him, and for
a few mad seconds, he contemplated throwing his laptop to
the floor or through Tony’s window.

The rage left him just as quickly as it came on, and was

replaced by a depression so profound, his eyes filled with
tears that no amount of wiping could remove. He went to the
men’s loo to wash his face. Was Spen right, he asked himself
as he stared at his mottled complexion in the mirror? Should

he give this up now, instead of persisting for however long it
took to find another job?

But if he left now, Tony would have every excuse to

write an unflattering reference. Leaving before his probation
was completed couldn’t ever look good, even without a bad
or carefully neutral recommendation. Daniel didn’t know if
he could face months of job hunting again, especially now he
realised how little he’d enjoy the jobs he’d be applying for.
Maybe beans on toast for supper every night weren’t so bad.
For his own sake, he’d rather live frugally than take another
office job. He couldn't ask Dee and Alex to do that though,
and it still didn’t answer the problem of a long-term income.
The lawyers had warned him it could be years before the
various criminal and civil actions were settled.

So he’d better bloody well get on with it, and stop

feeling sorry for himself, hadn’t he? He was the head of the
family. Mum and Dad had never whined about their
responsibilities, so neither would he.

He returned to his desk, and sent a brief email to Spen

telling him what Tony wanted. It wasn’t the politest thing he
could have done—Spen had texted him several times over
the previous days to ask how he was, but Daniel hadn’t
answered. Spen’s company would have been so very
welcome, but Daniel hadn’t dared give into his desires, and
didn’t want to give Spen more reason to believe in his
inability to cope. He’d taken refuge in housework, cooking,

doing a few odd jobs, and the rest of the time, designing a
prototype for a remotely controlled artificial hand. It had
been his last project at Uni, one he’d barely started before
he’d had to leave to deal with his parents’ deaths. He would
never hand it in, and he wouldn’t produce anything that
wasn’t being done bigger and better by appliance
researchers, but robotic devices were one of his interests,
and it kept his mind off other things.

The nights had been tough. He would rather die than

admit that to Spen...or anyone. Talking about it would make
it worse, he knew that in his heart.

He scrolled through the list of emails, marking those that

needed attention, deleting those that didn’t, as a way of
procrastinating until he found the energy to actually deal with
the damn things. So many of them were actually for Tony to
answer, but instead of them going direct to him, they were
sent to Daniel, who would then have to ask Tony how to
answer them, then sit down and transcribe his thoughts. Why
this was supposed to be more economical than Tony dashing
off a quick answer, Daniel had no idea. Increasingly, he
found office affairs meaningless and staggeringly inefficient,
offensive to his engineering instincts almost past toleration.

His phone pinged to tell he had a text message from Spen.

“Meet me 4 lunch 2day, 12:30.”

Daniel texted back, “Sorry. 2 busy.”
Seconds later, “Make time or will sic Myko on2 u.”

“U wdnt dare.”
“U sure?”
Daniel sighed. “Wnker. OK.”
He got a “;-)” as his only reply.
He really didn’t want to talk to Spen because he was

bound to bring up the...thing. But he also missed the big guy,
and had been so very lonely over the weekend even with
Dee and Alex around. Spen looked at the world, analysed
problems in almost exactly the same way Daniel did. They
were always finishing each other’s sentences when they
talked about Cross-Channel or anything else remotely
technical. Daniel had no one else in his life like that any
more. If he could just persuade Spen not to keep bringing up
the other matter, they could be friends again.

If Spen hadn’t texted him ten minutes before their lunch

‘date’, Daniel would have completely forgotten. As it was,
he rushed into the pub five minutes late. Spen looked at
Myko. “Told you,” he said to his kem. “Where’s Kani?
Myko’s jonesing.”

“Aren’t you all butch and forceful today? Kani? Come

out, squirt.” Kani’s head appeared with a joyful chirp, then
he leapt down to be greeted ecstatically by Myko. “I wish
Tony would back down on this one.”

“Force it. He has no right asking you to hide him. I

ordered some of that veggie lasagne you liked so much, and
got you a juice. Figured you’d be pushed for time.”

Grateful as he was for the forward thinking, Daniel was

just a teeny bit pissed off at being managed. Okay, a lot
pissed off. “You don’t have to nanny me.”

“I’m not. It’s just efficient. If you want something else....”
But just then the food arrived and it smelled delicious.

Kani took a long sniff, his tail shivering with delight. Daniel
nudged him away and loaded up his fork. Suddenly he was
starving. “No, it’s okay. Why did you want lunch?”

“Missed you, that’s all. Wondered how you were. You

look tired.”

“Yeah. But I’m fine.”
“I’m sure,” Spen said, taking a long sip from his beer.

“So, Tony’s got his nuts in a tangle this morning? He sent me
the pissiest email. I nearly sent it off ‘accidentally’ on a
round office list.”

“He’s um...not happy. I told him it was something I ate,

so he’s less cranky at me directly. He thought I’d drunk too
much.”

“Yeah, right. Are you okay on that score? No headaches

or anything?”

“No, Nanny Spencer. I’m just fine, I keep telling you.”
“Good. What’s this about you going to the Northern

meeting?”

“Oh yeah, I need to ask your mum if she can mind Dee

and Alex for one night—the twenty-eighth. Tony says it will
be an overnight trip.”

“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why is it an overnight trip? Northern’s head office is a

two-hour train trip away, and Tony gets a vehicle allowance.
You could easily drive up and down in a day.”

Daniel frowned. “I don’t know. He just said it was and I

wasn’t going to argue, since he was already so worked up.
Does it matter? If your mum can’t do it, I think Dee and Alex
can manage one night on their own, so long as they have her
to call.”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine with it but that’s not the point.”
Daniel swallowed the bit of lasagne he’d been chewing,

lay his fork down and looked directly at Spen. “Then can we
stop talking about it? It’s my business, not yours. I’m about
this close to being thrown out on my ear and like I’ve
explained to you, I need to keep the job a little longer.”

“So you said,” Spen muttered, eating some of his salad.

“So, do you want to watch some more movies some time?”

“Uh, don’t you have better things to do with real

friends?”

“You’re a real friend, and no. God, Daniel, you have

such low self-esteem. You can’t imagine anyone enjoying
your company.”

“Sorry. My friends were either at Uni or from school,

and when Mum and Dad died, they kind of...evaporated. I
think they thought they would catch bad luck.”

“Idiots. Look, if you think I’m bothering you, just say so. I

don’t want to be a pest.”

Daniel flushed, and looked at Kani, utterly blissful as

Myko groomed him. “No, you’re not a pest. But I’m not a
kid. So long as we’re clear on that.”

Spen held his fist up for Daniel to bump. “Totally clear.

So, what did you get up to?”

~~~~~~~~

Spen managed to smooth the hackles of his prickly friend,

and even raised a smile or two on his weary face. Despite
Spen’s worst fears, Daniel’s strategy of denial seemed to be
working for him, at least for now. As a long-term tactic, it
sucked, but only Daniel could take the next step. But Spen
hadn’t given up on the police angle, and what Daniel had
told him about an overnight trip—an entirely unnecessary
overnight trip—with his sleazeball boss, had sent all the
alarms bells ringing. So while he carried on a pleasant
conversation with Daniel, his mind was busy turning over
how best he could find the evidence he needed, and work
around Daniel’s refusal to bring the law into it. Denial was
all very well but he didn’t think it would survive a second
attack—and if it wasn’t Daniel, it would be someone else.

“I need to get back,” Daniel said, wiping his mouth.

“Thanks for the meal. My turn next time.”

“You’re on. I’ll ask Mum about the twenty-eighth.”
“Thanks. I’ll draft up something for the handout and you

can comment.”

“That’ll save me some time. I’ll walk back with you.”
He’d have done it anyway, but he had an extra reason

today. Luke had heard about Daniel’s ‘bender’ before Spen
had mentioned it, and the gossip wasn’t flattering in the least,
he reported. Some of the speculation came far too close to
the truth for Spen’s comfort. He couldn’t stop people talking,
but he could at least show that Daniel had the support of at
least one senior manager, for what that was worth. People
stopped and looked as they passed. Daniel didn’t seem to
notice. Spen wasn’t naïve enough to believe he would
remain oblivious.

Daniel waved goodbye and headed for the lift, while

Spen walked to the stairs. Ten minutes after he sat down, he
received an email from Daniel to say Noble had explained
that he was going to Northern’s office early on the twenty-
eighth, and he wanted Daniel to be available for a breakfast
meeting the next day. It sounded completely plausible, and
yet Spen was at the point that if Noble said grass was green,
he’d have to stick his head out the window to check for
himself.

He tried his best to concentrate on his work, since he

wasn’t being paid to be Daniel’s minder, but his thoughts
kept going back to his friend—and his friend’s boss. He
didn’t like what those thoughts were coming up with it.

“Spen, do you have a moment?” Jyoti motioned him over

to her desk. “There’s something you need to look at.” Spen
come over to stand behind her. She pointed silently to the
relevant part of the print out in her hand. Myko squeaked and
jumped up and down on Spen’s shoulder.

“Shhh, calm down, squirt. Jyoti, come with me.” Spen

took her to the section’s small meeting room that doubled as
storage for dying computers on their way to recycling. What
she had in her hand was too explosive—and too important—
to discuss in the office. She’d found the smoking gun he’d
suspected. Now he had to work out the best way to use it.

Chapter 11

Coming into work knowing Tony would be away all day

at the Northern office—even if he and Daniel would be
meeting up later—was a relief. His boss had been, not to put
too fine a point on it, an absolute shit to work for since the
conference disaster. One minute he was praising Daniel
extravagantly over something he’d done satisfactorily, and
half an hour later he’d be tearing him down over some minor
error, even if it wasn’t Daniel’s mistake. Daniel went home
each evening with his guts in a knot, too tense to eat or sleep.

He hoped all the nastiness resulted from Tony’s anxiety

over the Cross-Channel rollout. If not, and this continued, it
barely mattered how long he stuck it out at his job—his
reference was going to suck. He’d already started looking at
job advertisements, but without any sense of hope, or belief
he could push himself as being competent and employable.
He did his best to hide his worries from Dee, but his sister
knew something was up. He palmed her off with excuses
about the rollout, but he couldn’t do that forever, and she
was too smart to be fooled for long.

He wasn’t looking forward to this visit to Northern, but it

did mean he would have the rest of tomorrow off, and then it
was the weekend. If he could just get one solid night’s sleep,
he would feel much better. Maybe he could take Spen up on
his offer of a movie night. Spen had completely stopped
commenting about the events at the conference, so Daniel

could relax in his company again. It had been great to have
an excuse to drop down to IT again. Kani had been making
the most of it. And today Daniel could let him out without
upsetting his boss.

Spen had arranged to have lunch with him again. The

handout had gone to Northern already so there was nothing
left for them to do, yet Spen was unusually tense, drinking his
pint with a determination that bordered on the disturbing.
“Something wrong?” Daniel asked.

“No. How are you?”
“Glad to have a boss-free day.”
Spen smiled but the expression disappeared too quickly.

“Never trust a manager who’s shitty to his underlings. He
sucks up to the clients and the bosses pretty well, but the test
is in how he treats you.”

“Yes. I know he’s crap. Do we have to talk about this

again?”

“No, we don’t. How are Dee and Alex? Mum was so

pleased they were staying over again.”

“So were they. They really like your parents.”
“You’d be welcome over there too, you know. Any time.

Doesn’t have to be when the kids need to stay.”

“Thanks. There’s just always so much to do at home.”
“Is it me? Because Mum would love to see you and I can

go somewhere else.”

“Don’t be silly, Spen. I’m having lunch with you.”

“Yeah.” Spen laughed a little. “I guess that answers me.

What time are you leaving? And what’s the hotel? A nice
one?”

“At four, and I have no idea. ‘Lilyvale’, it’s called. I’m

meeting Tony at seven.” Spen grunted. “I’ll be back here by
lunchtime tomorrow. Half day for me.”

“Good for you.” He checked his watch. “Bugger. I’ve got

to run. No, don’t rush. I’ll catch you soon. Good luck
tonight.”

“And tomorrow.”
Spen stopped. “Yeah. Tomorrow too. I’ll see you.” He

squeezed Daniel’s shoulder, a gesture from that Daniel
secretly adored as much as he hated the exact same thing
from Tony. Unfortunately, Tony did it a lot more often than
Spen did.

He had very little to do when he returned from lunch—

nothing compelling or important, for sure—so he played with
Kani and did some web-surfing to kill time before he had to
catch a taxi to the train station. He felt very little guilt about
skiving, another way this job had changed him. He even
understood why some of the other PAs were so disgruntled.
You had to have a particular personality as well as
intelligence to do this job, and he now knew he wasn’t PA
material. Unfortunately, he wasn’t engineer material without
the requisite degree. He wondered if he’d ever find a niche
in which he felt comfortable and qualified.

At five to four, he picked up his overnight bag and

headed for the lifts. He garnered a few disapproving looks
from the usual suspects. He had learned to ignore them,
though the unfairness of the hostility never failed to sting. He
kept his head down as he walked across the foyer, hoping to
avoid any more company staff.

“Daniel?”
He looked up and recognised the voice’s owner. Kani

squeaked with excitement when he saw Pyon, his erstwhile
partner in crime. “Julian? Hi. Are you here for a meeting?”

“Yes. With you. Come over, I’d like you to meet

someone.”

“Uh, Julian, I have a—”
“Yes, I know. Don’t worry, it’s all been sorted out.

Daniel, this is my boss and good friend, Leo Underwood.”

Julian indicated a quite elderly gentleman with smiling

eyes and a cute little white kem in his lap, sitting on one of
the leather armchairs. Kani chirped in greeting and the little
kem sat up and meeped. “Hello, Mr Underwood. Nice to
meet you.”

“Same here, young man. Julian told me so much about

you.”

Daniel flushed. “Oh. Nothing bad, I hope.”
“Of course not,” Julian said. “And this is my husband,

Zachary Ledbetter.”

One of the most extraordinarily handsome men Daniel

had seen outside—or inside—the pages of a glossy
magazine, stood and held out his hand. “Daniel.”

Daniel shook his hand. “Mr Ledbetter.” The man’s

enormous tawny kem, draped around his shoulders, yawned
delicately. Kani chirped, and won a lazy tail flick from the
big kem.

“Zachary’s my nephew and legal advisor,” Mr

Underwood said. “Julian?” Julian helped the man stand. He
leaned heavily on a stick once he was upright, but despite the
frailty of his body, there was nothing weak about his voice
or his intent gaze. “Daniel, I’ve arranged with Mr Stern for
you to go over some of the details of the projects your Mr
Noble showed Julian.”

Mr Stern was the head of the office, and his word was

law. “Yes. Uh, but I was just—”

Mr Underwood held up his hand. “Yes, you have a

meeting. Don’t worry. You won’t be late. I’m afraid this
can’t wait.”

As the man was an important potential client, Daniel

hoped Tony would understand. “Uh, there’s a room near Mr
Noble’s office where we can talk.”

“That would do splendidly. Here, take my arm. Julian

does like to cling to Zachary. Can’t understand the appeal
myself.”

Julian grinned, and Ledbetter’s icily gorgeous features

admitted a small smile. “Leo, you’re awful,” Julian chided.

“Quite so. Daniel? Lead the way?”
Still confused by all this, and wondering why on earth Mr

Stern hadn’t told him anything about it, Daniel took them all
up to Tony’s office, and ushered them into the interview
room. “Would you like tea or coffee, Mr Underwood?”

“Water, please, and call me Leo, dear boy. Zachary and

Julian will have green tea, if you don’t mind.”

Kani stayed behind to play with friends old and new,

while Daniel prepared the drinks. He found his unexpected
visitors chatting with each other and petting kems when he
returned. “Thank you,” Julian said. “Leo would like to see
the financial reports for the last three years, and if I could
see the updates on the city projects Tony mentioned last
time? I believe he said he was expecting them any day.”

Daniel went to fetch the files. All of this could have been

done anytime. What was the tearing hurry about four pm on a
Thursday afternoon?

Leo went over the financial reports carefully, passing

each to Zachary and Julian for their perusal too. Daniel had
to do nothing but pass over the occasional folder, and once,
fetch another file. Mr Stern or his secretary could have done
this just as well, and often did so. Half past four went, then
five. That was his train missed then. “Excuse me,” he said.
“Would you mind if I just made a call to Tony? To let him
know I’ll be late.”

“Now Daniel,” Leo said, pinning him with his sharp

eyes. “I told you not to worry. I assure you what we’re doing
here is much more important than meeting Mr Noble on time.
Or do you think you know better than Mr Stern?”

“No, sir. I’m sorry.”
“Apology accepted. Now, tell me about the company.

How do you like working here?”

Daniel did his best to sound positive. Leo wanted to

know about his background, his education, and without even
trying, managed to elicit the facts about Daniel’s parents.
Zachary Ledbetter listened intently as Daniel told that part of
his story, nodding with apparent sympathy from time to time.
When Daniel was done, Julian took his husband’s hand.
“Zachary lost his parents when he was seven.”

“I’m sorry,” Daniel said.
“So am I,” Zachary said, sadness briefly clouding his

brilliant green eyes. “You’re one of the few people who
knows the truth of that, I’m sure.” He looked at his watch,
and something passed between him and Julian. Julian looked
at Leo.

“Not long now,” Leo said, apparently apropos of nothing.

“Perhaps another cup of tea, Julian? Daniel, I would love a
fresh glass of water.”

After half past five now. Daniel suppressed a sigh.

“Certainly. Tea, Mr Ledbetter?”

“Yes, thank you.”
Even with the fresh drinks consumed, and all the files

gone over in minute detail, his visitors were still in no hurry
to leave. It was now after six. Daniel began to wonder if Leo
was a little dotty, or if he’d been set up for a particularly
elaborate practical joke. “Will Mr Stern be joining us?” he
asked.

“Yes. In fact, now, I believe. Edward, how nice to meet

you finally.”

Daniel scrabbled to his feet as the company head walked

in. “Leo, you too. Sorry about the circumstances though.
Daniel.” Daniel jerked, not expecting to be addressed. “I
need you to come with me.”

“And that’s our cue to depart, Julian. Daniel, Zachary

will stay a little longer for reasons that will become clear.”
Julian helped Leo stand, then Leo laid his hand on Daniel’s
arm. “I want you to know that you have my full support, and
that of my family.”

“Thank you, sir, but support for what?”
“Daniel, this way, please.”
For tuppence, Daniel would have stamped his foot and

yelled “No!” He really didn’t appreciate not being told what
was going on, or being ordered about like cattle. But with
Mr Stern in front of him, and Zachary Ledbetter behind him,
he had no choice but to let himself be taken up two floors to
Mr Stern’s office, and into the adjoining meeting room.
Another shock awaited him—a man he didn’t know stood
there, along with Spen. Kani squeaked excitedly when he

saw Spen and Myko, but Daniel made him shush.

“What’s going on?” he demanded. “Spen? Why are you

here?”

“Daniel, this is Detective Inspector Shah,” Mr Stern said.

“He needs to talk to you. Spencer will explain, and Zachary
has offered to be your legal advisor if you so wish it.”

“Legal....” He gripped the back of a chair because his

knees had gone weak. “Am I under arrest?”

“Absolutely not,” Detective Shah said. “Please, Daniel,

do sit down. Mr Reardon will explain. Thank you, Mr
Stern.”

“I’ll be in my office,” Mr Stern said. “Daniel, you are

not in trouble.”

“Thank you,” Daniel whispered. He slid into the chair

he’d been using as support, and held Kani protectively close
to his chest. Everyone else took a seat, then Zachary spoke
quietly to his beautiful kem who then disappeared. “Has
something happened to Dee and Alex? Spen?”

“No, no. Daniel, everyone’s okay. Dee and Alex are

perfectly safe with Mum and Dad. This is about Tony and the
conference.”

Daniel started to stand, but Zachary placed his hand on

his arm, so he stopped. “I told you I didn’t want to pursue
that,” he growled.

“I know, but things have moved on. Inspector?”
Shah coughed. “Daniel, Tony Noble’s just been arrested

at the hotel where you and he were to meet.”

“What? Why?”
“Because he’s been buying GHB over the internet, using

his office laptop,” Spen said. “I asked Jyoti to check the disk
image backups and it’s all there. Not just his internet
searches, but also the emails confirming purchases. He’s a
fucking techno-idiot, thank god.”

“We found a Class C substance in his home,” the

inspector added, “and doctored bottles of mineral water in
the hotel room which we suspect also contain this drug. We
also, uh, found pictures on his phone. Pictures of you.
Naked.”

Daniel covered his mouth, wanting to puke. Kani meeped

in concern, nudging his arm. “I’ll get some water,” Spen
said, rising to fetch it from a metal jug standing on a tray at
the side.

“Daniel, I just need to ask this to rule it out,” Inspector

Shah said. “Are you in a sexual relationship with Tony
Noble?” Daniel shook his head. “Have you ever had sex
with him? Did you give him permission to take photos of you
naked?”

“No, never,” Daniel whispered. “It was him?”
“Yes, we believe so. Security footage at the hotel doesn’t

back up his version of what happened that night. We’ve got
him on the drug charge, no question. We can get him on
administering a toxic substance and sexual assault, if you

give a statement.”

“I don’t remember anything.” Spen returned with the

water, and nudged the glass towards Daniel when he ignored
it. Daniel took a sip, but nearly gagged on it.

“I understand. All we need from you is what you do

remember, and whether or not you consented to photographs
and the sex.”

“I can’t. I don’t want to drag my family into this.”
“Daniel,” Spen said. “He’s done it before. His last PA

left because Tony pressured him into sex and took photos of
him. The one before him left because Tony made advances.
They didn’t want a fuss either, which is why you were
victimised. Do you want this to go on and on? Another young
man who needs a job badly enough to ignore what’s been
obvious for some time?”

Daniel glared with the full force of his sick betrayal.

“You lied to me. You said you’d drop it. I told you I didn’t
want to pursue it.”

“Yes. But I wanted you not to be drugged and raped

tonight more than I wanted you to like me.”

Zachary interrupted the staring match. “Inspector Shah, I

believe you need Daniel to make the statement at the station.
Daniel, if you consent to this, I can sit in with you to advise
you or answer any legal questions you may have.”

“I haven’t consented.”
The inspector sighed. “At the moment, Daniel, the drug

charges will probably result in a fine. Mr Stern is prepared
to sack Noble for that alone, but he’ll just move on to another
post and carry out his harassment elsewhere. With your
statement, and the supporting evidence we have, we might be
able to make sexual assault stick, and that puts him on the
register. He won’t be able to find another job without
disclosing his record. No more victims.”

“My duty is to my family first, not strangers.”
“What if it was Alex in his first job?” Spen said.
Daniel stood, holding his stomach. Kani, who’d been

very quiet all this time, licked his cheek to comfort him. “My
brother and sister. The publicity. They’ve already been
through so much.”

“Your name will be kept out of the media,” Detective

Shah said. “That’s standard in a sexual assault case.”

“What if he gets off?”
“He’s still on our radar. And he’ll still have a

conviction. I want this guy, Daniel. He’s a rapist. Don’t let
him walk.”

Daniel turned to Zachary. “What do you think?”
“He’s correct about your identity being protected. I can’t

promise Noble would be convicted of assault charges, but
Mr Stern is certainly going to fire him. He was simply
waiting for confirmation of the drug purchase. He’s formally
suspended without pay, and I believe the usual disciplinary
proceedings will proceed quite quickly.”

“You knew,” Daniel said, staring at Spen. “This

afternoon, you knew what was going to happen.”

“Yes. We had to lull him into a false sense of security.

Daniel, there was no breakfast meeting. He had drugged
mineral water waiting for you. He was going to do it again.
He was going to attack you. He’d do it as often as he could
get away with it.”

Daniel sat again, not sure if he could prevent himself

from vomiting. He shook his head as Zachary offered him the
water.

“Perhaps we could leave it until tomorrow?” Zachary

said.

“If necessary. Noble will get bail if we do. He won’t on

a sexual assault charge, not without conditions. We can make
sure he stays away from you and your family.”

Daniel chewed his lip. He’d wanted to avoid all this, but

maybe his objections didn’t amount to much now. “I’ll do
it,” he said. “But for the record, I really hate you for doing
this,” he said to Spen.

“I’m sorry.” Spen stood. Myko gave Daniel a strangely

disappointed look, his tail drooping. Kani squeaked at his
friend, but Myko’s human didn’t look at him. “Mr Stern will
want a quick word, and then I’ll head off. Thank you,
Zachary.”

“You’re welcome. You’ve done good work.” Daniel

gave his ‘informal advisor’ a glare for that, but Zachary

didn’t blink.

Spen sent one last look of appeal Daniel’s way, but

Daniel didn’t soften, so he left, and shortly after, Mr Stern
came in. “Daniel, I’m very sorry to hear what’s happened.
You and I will have to talk about your future here, but for
now, I want you to take tomorrow and the next week off on
paid leave. I believe the police have to confiscate computers
and so on, so you’ll need to stay out of the way. If Noble
attempts to contact you—”

“You tell us,” Inspector Shah said. “I have a car

downstairs. Thank you, Mr Stern.”

Daniel felt too numb, too betrayed, to even look at his

boss as the officer led them out to the lifts. “Who knows?” he
asked Zachary. Inspector Shah was talking on his phone,
paying them no attention.

“Myself, Julian, Leo, Spencer, his assistant, Jyoti, and

Mr Stern. Mr Stern is very anxious to keep this quiet for
now. If and when Noble is charged, there will likely be
media coverage. A regrettable amount of gossip will
inevitably follow, if my own office is any indication.”

“Wonderful. I guess this job is toast anyway.”
“Why would you want to continue working for a man like

that?” Zachary asked.

“I don’t. But I need a job.” He didn’t feel like explaining

all the issues involved in that need. He didn’t want to be
here at all.

“You need friends more,” Zachary said, still with the stiff

formality that coloured everything he’d said so far. “I
learned this from Julian.”

“The only friend I’ve got just stabbed me in the back.”
The inspector turned. Apparently he had been listening

after all. “That friend just saved you from sexual assault,
maybe even death, if Noble had got his dose wrong.”

“He has a point,” Zachary said. “I believe Spencer acted

from the finest motives.”

Daniel didn’t know what to say to that. Spen had lied to

him. Spen had saved his bacon, maybe his life. Spen had just
lost him a job he needed to prove he could look after Dee
and Alex. Spen had just saved him from a job that was
ruining his life. “I don’t want to talk about it,” he muttered.

The process of making the statement was easier than he

expected. He thought he’d have to sit in one of those horrible
interview rooms like they used on TV cop shows, but instead
Inspector Shah took them all to a room with ordinary sofas,
offered him tea, and took him carefully but not
unsympathetically through the events of that evening, and his
relationship with Tony. Zachary asked his kem to come out,
and Kani’s respectful playing with the lovely creature
offered some welcome distraction at points of stress. The
inspector was considerate about breaks too, and everyone
was remarkably patient. Still, Daniel had a headache and a
stomach that still wanted to turn inside out by the time he

was asked to sign the statement the inspector had typed up
for him.

“Is it enough to convict him of rape?”
The inspector grimaced. “It’s always difficult to

prosecute that, Daniel, and with you being the only witness
and having no memory of the event, that’s not going to help.
However, we do have a good deal of solid circumstantial
evidence supporting your version of events and directly
contradicting his, so I’ll push hard for it. The drugs and the
pictures are definitely going to get him into trouble. The final
decision on the exact charges isn’t up to me. You haven’t
wasted your time here, I promise you.”

Daniel shrugged. “Can I go now?”
“Yes, of course.” The inspector turned and fetched

something from the table behind him. “Ah, you might want to
look at this too. I’ll have Victim Support contact you, and
they can give you more information about counselling and so
on. Medical tests as well.”

It was the same damn pamphlet Spen had offered him.

Daniel shoved it into his pocket with a muttered “thanks”,
and looked at Zachary. “Thank you, inspector,” Zachary said,
getting to his feet. His kem positioned himself gracefully
along Zachary’s shoulders again. “I’ll advise you if Daniel
decides to engage another legal advisor.”

“That’s fine. Thank you, Daniel. It took courage to come

here tonight.”

No, just a pushy ‘friend’, he thought. Zachary called

Julian, and then ordered a taxi. They stood outside the station
to wait. “How much will this cost me?”

“Nothing, for now. You’ll be told if you need to incur any

costs.”

“Why? You don’t know me.”
“As a favour to Julian, and because I don’t need your

money.” His features softened. “I realise the job situation
makes it awkward, but I believe you’ll look back in a few
months and be grateful to Spencer, and that you took this
step.”

“Maybe. I guess they’ll have to fire me. I mean, if Tony’s

getting the boot. I haven’t even finished probation.”

“Very likely they will want to let you go just to draw a

line under this episode, and frankly, I think it’s the best for
you. However, there’s no reason at all we can’t make that
departure as favourable to you as possible. When Mr Stern
contacts you, I would suggest you have me attend the meeting
with you, if you permit it. At the very least, I strongly advise
you not to accept anything he offers until you discuss it with
me or another solicitor, and make sure it’s all put in writing.
Your company put you at risk, and you suffered directly as a
result. I don’t see why they shouldn’t pay handsomely for
that.”

“Sue?” Daniel’s voice came out in a squeak. Kani copied

him, which only made it more mortifying.

“I doubt that will be necessary. Mr Stern is very

embarrassed about this, and what Julian discovered
regarding the other staff members. At the very least, we can
obtain a cushion for you while you look elsewhere, and very
likely the cost of any counselling you wish to undertake. If
you spend any money at all regarding this, keep receipts.”

“Okay.” Daniel couldn’t think about this at all. He barely

cared. He just wanted to go home...oh but Dee and Alex
wouldn’t be there. He’d be in the house alone. Just great.

Zachary had the taxi drop him off at home first. “Here’s

my card, and on the back is Julian’s number. He asked me
specifically to tell you to call him if you want any help at all.
He and Leo have taken this very much to heart, on my
account, and on Spencer’s.”

“No need,” Daniel mumbled.
“I’ve learned arguing with either of them is a waste of

time,” Zachary said with a slight smile. “Good night...and
good luck.”

“Thanks.”
The taxi drove off. Daniel walked up the dimly lit path.

The porch light came on as he took his key out.

“Daniel?”
He dropped the key in shock and whirled, hand in his

pocket on his mobile phone ready to call the police. “Who’s
there? Come out!”

Chapter 12

“You should talk to him.”
“He’s furious with me, Jules. I went behind his back.”
“Yeah but...talk to him, Beanie. The poor sod needs a

friend. Even Zachary noticed.”

“You dissing your husband?”
“Hey, I love him more than life but he doesn’t exactly do

nuance, you know? Beanie, go over there. The worst thing
that can happen is that he’ll yell at you again, and maybe he
needs to. You know you did what you had to do. So...be
strong for him.”

“Why don’t you talk to him, Julian? He likes you.”
Spen’s friend sighed. “He likes you more. That’s why

he’s upset.”

“He’s upset because I lied to him and lost him his bloody

job. And you know, I don’t blame him.”

“Then tell him.”
Spen’s turn to sigh. “Okay. I should check on him

anyway.” He walked towards the stairs, and down them, still
holding the phone to his ear.

“You do that. And Leo wants you both to come for

supper. He wants to talk to Daniel about his future, and he
wants you to back him up.”

“Your boss is really making him a project, isn’t he?”
“He feels a little guilty at tricking him. But mostly he

hates to see talent wasted, and Daniel is that in spades.”

“He is. Let me know when, but don’t be surprised if he

says no.”

“I won’t. Leo won’t let it go, though. He doesn’t know

the word.”

“Hah, makes two of you.”
“Taught me all I know. Talk soon, Spen.”
“Thanks, Julian. For everything.”
“You’re welcome. Now go!”
“Going, going....” He snatched up the keys to his mother’s

car as he disconnected in the kitchen. “Heading over to
Daniel’s,” he told her as she looked at him. Dee and Alex
were in the living room, talking to Spen’s Dad. Both his
parents had known well in advance what was likely to
happen this evening, and their support had helped Spen
through this. “Do you need your car in the morning?”

“No, love, I can take the bus in, if you pick me up in the

afternoon. Stay with him or bring him back, Spencer. The
child shouldn’t be alone.”

“No, he shouldn’t. Thanks, Mum.” He kissed her cheek.

“At some point, the kids will have to be told. He might need
our help for that.”

“Of course. He doesn’t have to do this on his own. You

make sure you tell him.”

“I will.”
Spen pulled up near the front of Daniel’s house just a

minute or so before a taxi stopped outside. He wasn’t

completely sure it was Daniel and Zachary’s, until Daniel
climbed out and walked up the path. His shoulders were
hunched, and he looked defeated and tired as he approached
the front door. Spen climbed out of the car and walked
quickly to catch his friend up. “Daniel?”

He’d assumed Daniel would have heard his footsteps, but

mentally slapped himself for stupidity as Daniel turned in
fright, dropping his key ring. “Who’s there? Come out!”

“It’s only me. Calm down.”
Daniel collapsed against the front door. Spen picked the

fallen keys and handed them to him. Daniel snatched the keys
away. “What the hell are you doing here, Spen?”

“Checking on you. Why don’t you let yourself in?”
“Why don’t you bugger off?” Daniel said, but without any

great force behind it.

When he opened the door, and Spen followed him in, he

didn’t actually protest. “I’m going to change. You’re not
welcome, you realise.”

“Yeah, I do. I’ll make something for you to eat while you

change.”

Daniel made a face and headed towards the stairs. So far

things weren’t as horrible as they could be, but there was
plenty of time for them to deteriorate. Spen didn’t really
have a plan, or know the first thing about how to handle
someone in Daniel’s situation. Or how to get past the fact
that he’d been hiding and lying to the kid about some

important stuff, and now Daniel would know just how far
those lies and omissions went.

There were proper meals in the freezer, but Spen decided

scrambled eggs were as inoffensive and easy to digest as
anything else in the fridge. He was just serving up as Daniel
came back, now dressed in T-shirt and jeans. Kani ran over
and jumped up onto the kitchen counter so he could lick
Myko, but Kani’s human was a lot less friendly. “I don’t
need you to cook for me. I’m not hungry.”

“Too bad.” Spen set the plate in front of him. “Eat. If you

want to be angry, at least do it with food in your stomach.”

Daniel narrowed his eyes at him, and stabbed the eggs

with a fork. “Why are you here?”

Spen sat down. “You eat, I’ll talk. Then you can yell.

Deal?” Daniel gave him a disgusted look. “There’s a lot to
talk about. Eat. Please, Daniel.”

Daniel rolled his eyes, but ate a forkful of food. He

winced a little, but a second forkful followed. Spen got up
and poured him some milk, which went down easily too.
After a few more mouthfuls, Daniel muttered, “Okay, talk.”

“First of all, I’m sorry. I knew you’d be angry, and

you’re right to be. I lied to you, we tricked you, and I
screwed things up so far as working there is concerned. I
don’t blame you a bit. But,” he added, folding his arms, “I
wouldn’t change a damn thing. Noble’s a dangerous
criminal, and he needs to be stopped.”

“You already said all this,” Daniel said, before drinking

more milk. “I’m not stupid. But now I have to deal with the
mess you left me in.”

“Yes, but not alone. We all want to help. Julian, Leo,

Zachary, Mum, Dad....”

“You?” Daniel finally asked when Spen didn’t continue.
“Yeah, of course.”
“Why? I’m nothing to you.”
“Didn’t we already have this conversation?”
“Yeah. You lied to me. You already had Tony’s number.

You were already investigating him. I was just...collateral
damage.”

“You think this is about him?” Daniel shrugged. “Why

would I give a damn about him if it wasn’t for you?”

“Why wouldn’t you trust me with the truth if sticking it to

him wasn’t the most important thing? You hurt me because I
might damage your lovely set up. Well, nice work. Now the
world knows my business, I have to dump a load of crap on
my sister the week of her exams, every man and his mutt
wants to inspect my arse and counsel my poor victimised
mind, and...that’s all I am to you. Poor little orphan rape
victim Daniel.”

Spen sat there, stunned by the volume and ferocity of

Daniel’s complaint. Daniel’s cheeks had high spots of colour
in them, and his green eyes blazed with fury. “You’ve got it
all wrong,” Spen murmured.

“Really. I don’t care. I’ve managed just fine without

anyone’s help since Mum and Dad died, and I’ll get through
this too. Everyone wants me to fall apart because Tony stuck
his dick up my arse without permission. I’m telling you,
that’s nothing compared to getting a call from the police to
tell you your parents are unrecognisable smears of bloody
meat under three tons of concrete. Nothing.”

“Daniel—”
“Shut up. My turn.” He pushed his plate away. “Why

didn’t you tell me you were investigating him? About the
drugs?”

“Because you’d made it clear you didn’t want to know. I

didn’t know what we had until we had it, and then I didn’t
have a choice any more. I had to go to the police.”

“And today? With Julian? Why not just tell me what you

were doing, what the police were doing?”

“Because...we didn’t want you to accidentally tip him

off.”

Daniel’s lips thinned dangerously. “And why the hell

would I do that to someone planning to rape me, Spen?”

“I...didn’t think you were acting all that rationally. You

were in denial. You were,” he insisted as Daniel glared.
“You wouldn’t bring the police before....”

“For perfectly good reasons.”
Spen made a “well, okay, then” gesture. “What do you

want me to do? What can I say to make it better?”

“You can’t.”
Daniel took his plate and glass to the sink and started to

wash them up with what seemed like a good deal more
splash and noise than was strictly necessary. Spen waited,
out of his depth and not at all sure coming over hadn’t made
it worse.

When Daniel finished, he threw the tea towel at the hook

and turned around to glare at Spen. “Okay, you apologised. I
think you’ve done enough for one night, don’t you? Go
home.”

“What about you?”
“I’m fine.”
“Mum said I should bring you back.”
“No thanks. I’ve been coping on my own, and I can keep

on doing that.”

He scooped up Kani and walked out. Since he didn’t

come back after five minutes, Spen figured he was
dismissed. Okay, so now things were as horrible as they
could be. He hadn’t done enough. He hadn’t done anything
like enough. He couldn’t leave Daniel like this, so brittle and
furious and with so much hurt in his eyes. He wasn’t the right
person to help but there wasn’t anyone else who could.
Julian would be better than this. His mum would be better.
But they weren’t here.

So, knowing he wasn’t wanted, he went in search of his

friend. He found him in the living room, on the sofa, his

knees under his chin and giving the world a thousand yard
stare. Kani lay alongside Daniel’s thigh, ignored but refusing
to abandon his human. Spen sat down beside the two of them.
Myko climbed down his arm and gave Kani a cuddle. Spen
wished he could do the same for Daniel.

“You’re wrong about one thing, you know. I don’t see

you as a victim. Not just as a victim.” Daniel didn’t react.
“You really are a friend. I’d do this for anyone I thought was
being set up for assault. But I wouldn’t be so upset that they
were angry at me.”

Daniel glanced sidelong at him. “Only what you

deserve.”

“I guess. So, how have you been, really?”
“None of your business.”
“For God’s sake, Daniel. Throw me a bone here. You’re

behaving like it’s been a ball of laughs for me to find out
what Noble’s been doing to you and the others.”

“You never liked him.”
“No. But that’s different from knowing he was drugging

and raping people.”

Daniel buried his chin lower. “Poor Spen.”
“Yeah, poor, poor, pitiful me. And now someone I really

like, who my mother really likes, who one of my closest
friends really likes, thinks I’m a shit because I give a damn
about him. Sucks to be me.”

“Yeah, doesn’t it.”

Spen shook his head. “Right. Well, when you’re ready to

talk, you know my number. I want to help you, but I guess
you really don’t need it. See you around, Daniel.”

He stood up. Myko protested, and kept his possessive

hold on Kani. Daniel said nothing, didn’t even move.
“’Night,” Spen said, and headed towards the door. Myko
didn’t go with him, but Spen trusted him to do what was
right, even if no one else knew what it was.

He heard Daniel say something. “What?” he asked

without turning.

“I don’t hate you. I just...wish....”
Spen turned. Daniel was still in the curled up position,

face half-buried by his knees. “What do you wish, kiddo?”

He half-expected Daniel to gripe about the nickname, but

he didn’t. “I wish I could go back to before.”

Spen came closer. “Before...?”
Daniel looked up, his eyes brimming with tears. “To

when I didn’t know,” he whispered.

Spen knelt in front of him, and put his hands over

Daniel’s. “I know. Damn it, I wanted to be wrong. I wanted
not to find what we did. I wanted...it almost sounds
worse...but I wanted you to have slipped out of the hotel for
an anonymous shag or something. I knew that wasn’t likely,
but the truth was worse.”

“Yeah.” Daniel wiped his eyes on his knees, then looked

up again, not really at Spen, but something in his inner

thoughts. “He seemed so kind. I mean, annoying, but he
seemed to care about...you know. I wanted to believe it
wasn’t him, but part of me must have known. When you told
me what they’d found, I wasn’t really surprised. I was just
angry.”

“At me.”
“Yeah. But I should have been angrier at him. I can’t

seem to get that angry at him. I’m numb. I believe it was him
but I don’t....”

“Know it?”
“No. I wasn’t there. I didn’t see it for myself.”
“No.” He squeezed Daniel’s hands. “Want me to hang

around for a bit?”

Daniel shrugged, so Spen climbed up on the sofa. He kept

a small but distinct space between them, not wanting to
appear intrusive. “Daniel, there are people who can—”

“I don’t want people. I don’t want to tell some stranger

about this. I don’t want to talk about it at all. I want to get
past it.”

“Pretend it never happened?”
“If I have to.”
“That’ll be hard with the court case coming up.”
“Maybe they won’t charge him with rape. The inspector

said they might not be able to.”

“Right. What did Zachary say?”
“The same. He wants the company to pay compensation

for putting me in danger. I don’t really care.”

“You might later. Listen to his advice. They want to

help.”

“Yeah. Now people want to help. Where were they—”

He stopped short and covered his face with his hand. “Sorry.
Wrong tragedy.”

Instinctively, Spen reached for Daniel’s unoccupied

hand. “It’s all wrapped up together, Danny. Noball targeted
you because you were vulnerable and needed the job. If your
parents hadn’t died, you wouldn’t have been there.”

Daniel jerked his hand away. “Don’t you dare blame

them!”

Fuck. “I’m not. I just mean...you can’t separate the two

like that. You don’t have to. Noble’s a predator. He looks
for young guys like you. Jan’s mother was dying of cancer
when Noble hired him. The one before that? Had been in a
car accident in which his boyfriend was killed.”

“Lovely.”
“Yeah, only not. So if you need to talk about your parents

—”

“I don’t. I don’t need anything. I manage just fine.”
Spen’s temper snapped. “Did it ever occur to you that the

reason people didn’t help you when they died is because
every time someone tries, you slap them away? I keep telling
you there are people who want to help you—people like
Mum and Dad who aren’t just offering, but who are doing—

and still you’re whining about no one helping you. Even a
saint would get sick of that shit after a while.”

Daniel gave him a teary, startled look. “I never...no one

offered, except our grandparents. Not practical offers we
could use. You and your Mum...you’re the first.”

“And the last, if you keep pushing me away. Danny, I’m

here. I want to help. I care.”

“You think I’m a pathetic kid.”
“No. I think you’ve had a hell of a lot of bad luck, but

you’ve done more than most could have. You’re not pathetic.
Annoying, ungrateful, rude and contradictory, yeah, but not
pathetic.”

Daniel’s eyes widened in surprise. “Wow, I’m really

feeling the sympathy.”

“You don’t want sympathy. You want it all to go away.

Well, I can’t make that happen. I can talk, I can sit with you,
even all night if you want. I can listen to you yell or cry or
talk or whatever you want. I can make you coffee or cocoa or
tea. I can get you drunk, or keep an eye on you while you
sleep. I can do a lot of things, Danny, but making the bad shit
not happen isn’t one of them. I don’t think you’re weak or
pathetic or stupid or that you did anything to bring this on
yourself, but it happened, and pretending it didn’t won’t
work.”

“No, I suppose not.” Daniel rubbed his eyes again. “I’m

so tired,” he murmured. “It’s funny. I’d almost been looking

forward to going to the hotel because I might sleep.”

“Not sleeping here?”
“No. Not in my bed. Down here sometimes.”
“Nightmares?”
“No. Something...something worse. I lie in bed and...I

don’t want it to happen, but it just does. I start replaying
what I remember of what happened just before...in the bar, I
mean.”

“When you went for drinks with him and the others?”
“Yeah. I get to a certain point and then there’s

this...nothing.” He shivered. “I feel like I’m falling into the
hole where the memory should be. Being swallowed by the
nothing.” He shrugged. “Then I get up and come downstairs,
read until I sleep. Sometimes it takes a while to happen.”

“You could have taken time off.”
“Yeah, right. I thought I’d already labelled myself a

drunk. I didn’t know the man I was trying to prove something
to was behind it.”

Spen touched his shoulder, then remembered why that

was a bad idea. He pulled his hand away. “Sorry.”

“Why? I don’t mind.” As if to prove the point, Kani

climbed up onto Daniel’s shoulder and looked at Spen, as if
to ask him why he couldn’t make such a natural gesture of
comfort. Spen patted Kani, but was careful not to touch
Daniel again. Daniel turned to look at him. “What’s wrong,
Spen?”

“I don’t want to be...you know, like him. Always patting

you.”

Daniel grimaced. “That I won’t miss. I hated that. I

thought he was just friendly, but I guess he was feeling out
the territory.”

“Yes, he was. Softening you up. I hated seeing him do it.”
“That night! You saw him on the security video, didn’t

you?”

Busted. “Yeah. And while I’m being honest...I knew

about your family before you told me. Luke, uh, had been
investigating. Because he’d heard rumours not everything
was on the up and up with your recruitment.”

“Oh great. More people to avoid. But I suppose I don’t

have to worry about that now. I mean, since I won’t be going
back.” He said it without any nastiness in his tone, just the
resignation of someone used to hearing bad news.

“Doesn’t mean we have to lose touch,” Spen said.
“Oh sure. We can get together and reminisce about how

Tony hired me to be his boyfriend, and how you thwarted his
evil rape plans. Yeah, a barrel of laughs for young and old.”

Kani meeped at Spen, and batted at his hand. When Spen

lifted it away, thinking it was annoying the little guy, Kani
stamped his foot—and so did Myko. What the hell? He put
his hand gingerly on Daniel’s shoulder, and Kani trilled,
stroking his fingers with his tail. Ah, that’s what he wanted.
Not subtle at all, kems.

“That’s not all we can talk about.”
“Maybe,” Daniel said, leaning ever so slightly into his

touch. “I can’t think, Spen. Look, I’m just going to try and
sleep down here. You should go home.”

“I can stay. Mum doesn’t need the car in the morning, and

I wasn’t planning to go into work.”

“You shouldn’t....”
“What?”
“Rearrange your life for me.”
Spen squeezed Daniel’s shoulder. “I’m not. I’m helping a

friend out. You shouldn’t be on your own, Danny.”

Daniel’s eyes closed. Spen thought it was in pleasure, but

it might have been pure exhaustion. “Why do you call me
that?”

“Dunno. You just look more like a Danny than a Daniel.

Not a Dan, though.”

“Never. Dad called me Danny.”
“You want me to stop?”
“No. Unless you’re being sarcastic, I don’t mind.” He

unfolded his legs and leaned back against the sofa cushions.
“I don’t mind if you stay, but where will you sleep?”

“Here? On the armchair? Or next to you? What would

you like?”

“Here,” Daniel murmured. “S’nice. Really, really

tired....”

“Get comfortable then. I’ll fetch a blanket.”

“On the chair,” Daniel said, a massive yawn half-

swallowing his words.

Spen looked around and noticed two neatly folded

blankets and a pillow on the armchair near the window. He
rose to fetch them. Myko stayed where he was, lying against
Daniel’s thigh, Kani cuddled in his arms. So sweet. And too
tempting an idea.

He draped a blanket over Daniel, and shoved the pillow

under his unresisting head. He curled up at the other end of
the sofa, but his long legs weren’t made for that kind of
position. Try as he might to discreetly arrange himself, he
couldn’t get comfortable. “Maybe we should move up to
your bed,” he grumbled.

Daniel’s head snapped up, and Spen realised what it had

sounded like as those green eyes bored into him. “Shit, I’m
sorry. Forget I said anything.”

Daniel continued to stare. He was starting to freak Spen

out a little. “Daniel? I said forget it.”

“What if I don’t want to?”
“Look, don’t you think I’ve apologised enough—”
“I think it’s a great idea. If you don’t mind.”
“I wasn’t really thinking.”
Daniel sagged back. “Oh. Okay. I guess you think it’s a

bit skeevy, with me being the poor rape victim and
everything.”

Spen spat out a curse which made Kani squeak and Myko

bat at Spen’s leg with a clawed paw in reproach. “Will you
lay off with that shit? I was trying to be considerate!”

“So was I. You’re never going to sleep down here like

that, Beanpole.”

The use of Julian’s nickname forced a laugh out of him.

“Watch it, squirt.” Daniel smiled a little. “All right. If you’re
okay with us sleeping upstairs and you think it’ll help, then
sure. But if you don’t want me to be here....”

Daniel reached out from under the blanket and clutched at

Spen’s arm. “Stay? Please?”

The raw need in Daniel’s voice plucked at heartstrings

Spen didn’t even know he owned. “Okay,” he said, his voice
gone a little gravelly with emotion. “Why don’t you...um...go
brush your teeth and stuff? I’ll clear up here. Is there a spare
toothbrush anywhere?”

“Yeah, Mum keeps them...I mean, kept them in the

bathroom. I’ll leave one out for you.”

“Thanks.” He ruffled Daniel’s hair, aiming for casual, but

he couldn’t miss the way Daniel pushed against his fingers,
as if looking for more contact. When had anyone last held the
guy?

“See you upstairs. Come on, Kani.” He disentangled

himself from the blanket and stood.

“You go with him, Myko. Be a chaperone.”
Daniel turned around and stuck his tongue out at him,

while Kani crossly stamped his foot. Myko made the most

peculiar noise, almost like a real growl. It sounded
disapproving, for sure. “That’s me told then,” Spen said,
amused as hell at the display of childishness.

“Yes, it is. Come on, you guys.”

~~~~~~~~

Spen took his time wiping down the kitchen counter,

putting away dishes, waiting until he could hear nothing from
the upper floor before climbing the stairs. He used the
toothbrush left there for him, and washed his face. Shit, he
looked nearly as wrecked as Daniel, but then he hadn’t been
sleeping too well either. Keeping secrets from his friends
and worrying about whether the police would really nail
Noble as they hoped, hadn’t been good for him, or fun of any
kind at all. Even if Daniel hadn’t forgiven him—he had
forgiven him, hadn’t he?—Spen would feel better just
because he no longer had the burden of those secrets. Of
course it wasn’t over, and he wasn’t naïve enough to believe
the next few weeks and months would be a ball of laughs for
Daniel as he waited for Noble’s prosecution. But now, they
could talk about it.

That was if he didn’t screw up tonight. God, did Danny

boy have any idea what he was asking? But Spen had
suggested it and he only had his own big mouth to blame.
They’d shared a room, even shared a bed watching movies.
He could do this, play the good buddy, keep the scary
emptiness from descending for one night at least. Daniel

didn’t want more, and even if he did, now was so not the
time to give it.

Okay, he admitted it. He was out of his depth.

Completely. He was running on instinct, but his instincts had
never had to deal with this situation. What if he did screw it
up? He’d already hurt Daniel, risked losing his trust forever,
even if there hadn’t been any alternative. This could be
much, much worse.

He sighed. Nothing for it now, he supposed.
He left the bathroom and entered Daniel’s bedroom,

which was opposite. Daniel was curled up under the covers,
facing away from him on the far side of the wide single bed.
Spen couldn’t see the kems which probably meant they were
cuddling against Daniel’s chest.

Oh, hell. What should he wear? Jeans were buggers of

things to sleep in.

“I’ve already seen you in your underwear,” Daniel

muttered, reading his mind.

“Okay. This is a little weird for me, just so you know,”

Spen said, shucking his jeans and folding them over a chair.
He kept his T-shirt on, not having a vest on underneath.

“If you think I’m going to jump you, you’re so far off

track you have no idea.”

“Of course not. You’re being a bit of a prick.”
He heard a tiny chuckle. “Yeah. Get into bed, Spen. I just

want to sleep.”

“Me too.” He switched off the bedside lamp, then

climbed into the bed and under the covers, trying very hard
not to touch Daniel. An effort wasted by the fact that Daniel
immediately rolled over and snuggled up to him.

“Whoa. You little shit, you’re testing me.”
Another laugh. “Not really.” He looked up at Spen. “I

need to feel you’re here. I don’t want to be alone.”

Spen stroked the hair back off Daniel’s face, and maybe

fell in love just a little harder than he had before. “You’re
not,” he whispered. He put his arm over Daniel, and Daniel
sighed. “Go to sleep, Danny. We’ve got you.”

Daniel nodded, moving in a little closer. The kems

decided now was a good time to emerge and crawl up onto
the pillows, sitting on their humans’ heads—only Myko sat
on Daniel’s, Kani on Spen’s. I know what you little brats
are up to. Myko opened one eye to look at him, then
pretended to go back to sleep. Not fooling me, squirt. A tiny
pink tongue emerged from Myko’s mouth to give his opinion
of Spen’s thoughts.

Daniel was already asleep—really asleep, not faking.

Poor sod must really have been sleep-deprived. Spen
relaxed. This was what he was here for, to help the kid get
some rest. Even the kems had settled down and if they were
too tired to play, then sleep was a damn good idea. He
closed his eyes, and dropped off before he had time to
wonder if he would.

He woke with a heart-stopping jerk, instinctively

reaching out to protect his companion. He met Daniel’s arm,
and feeling down, realised Daniel had his T-shirt fisted in a
death grip. He wrapped his arms around Daniel and hugged
him tight. “It’s okay. You’re safe. I’m here, Danny.” He
spoke quietly, his thumbs stroking Daniel’s back to soothe
him. In the dark he couldn’t see the kems, but one of them
brushed against his hand so he knew they were doing their
bit.

“I’m okay now,” Daniel mumbled after a minute or so,

letting go of Spen’s shirt. “Sorry.”

“No problem. Nightmare?”
“No. Panic, like I said. Fear of falling. I don’t have

nightmares. I have dreams of...nice things that I can’t have
any more.”

Spen kept up his soothing thumb massage. “Sucks.”
“Really. I’m okay, honest. You don’t have to....”
“Want me to stop?”
“No. Yes. I mean....”
“I like doing it. Does that bother you? I’ll stop if it does.”
“No. I like it.”
Daniel went still. Spen kept on, but he sensed something

had shifted. With anyone else, in any other place, he would
know where this could go. But with Daniel....

“Danny?”
“Yeah?”

“Danny...uh...look....”
“Spen, if I wasn’t a poor pathetic orphan rape

victim...would you be here now?”

“No. But only because...well, we work together. We

wouldn’t even do that if...uh....”

“I wasn’t a poor pathetic orphan?”
“Come on, kid, knock that off. I just meant we wouldn’t

have met. It’s not a fair question.”

“No.” Daniel moved closer, his face against Spen’s

chest, his breath warming his skin. Spen tried to think of
designing security routines, data capture screens for
teachers, anything boring and annoying enough to stop his
body reacting to the gentle, tormenting sensation. “Spen, if I
tell you something now, here...would you be prepared to
forget it in the morning and never mention it again?”

“I can’t promise to forget, but I won’t ever mention it

unless you do. Uh...it’s not about him, is it? I mean, it’s
nothing to do with the police—”

“No, no. I don’t think so.”
“Because I can’t hide stuff from them. Not if it affects

that.”

“I have a crush on you. Like, the world’s biggest.

Supernova-sized.”

Spen’s laugh of pure relief escaped before he could

choke it off. Daniel tried to pull away, obviously hurt, but
Spen held him tight. “No, Danny, don’t. I’m not laughing at

you. I thought you might tell me you had a crush on...well,
you know.”

Daniel shivered. “I couldn’t. He gives me the creeps.”
“I bet.” Spen reached up to find Daniel’s hair, and

tangled his fingers in it. “You don’t want me to mention it?”

“No. Because...you’ll treat me differently. You’ll think I

wanted you to stay because of that and I didn’t. I just...I
needed someone to be with me so much. I feel like I’m losing
control.”

Despite himself, and knowing he was letting more of his

real feelings show than he really ought to, Spen kissed
Daniel’s head. “I know why you wanted me to stay, Danny
boy. I offered first, remember?”

Daniel relaxed a little. “Yeah. But I want us to be

friends, so I never said anything. I never would have said
anything, because we worked together, and because I need
you to be my friend. I don’t need more.”

Spen hugged him harder. “What if I wanted to offer you

more?”

“You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“I’m really not. You’re always telling me how I feel.

This is how I really feel.” He kissed Daniel’s hair again,
then bent lower and found his mouth, so he could kiss him on
the lips. Daniel sighed against his cheek. “Totally lousy
timing though.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Not you, kiddo. Me. Last thing you need is someone else

you looked to for help, taking advantage.”

“Are you?”
“Trying hard not to.” He stroked Daniel’s hair. “This is

such a bad time to be talking about this. We’re tired and the
situation is....”

“Horrible.”
“Yeah, it is. So let’s sleep on it. In the morning, if you

don’t mention, I won’t. I never will unless you do. I’ll be
your friend, and helping through all this, whatever you say.
You’re in control.”

“I’m a mess.”
“Now you admit it. You’re doing pretty well, Daniel.”
“Now you admit it.”
Spen chuckled and kissed Daniel’s hair again. “Yeah, I

do. Go to sleep, kiddo.”

“Don’t call me that, Beanie.”
“Okay. Think you can sleep now?”
“Maybe. I did better this time. I actually fell asleep for a

while before it hit. I think having Myko here helped.”

Spen’s kem chirped cheerfully at his name. Spen

growled. “Oh, well, if it’s only Myko you need....” He
pretended to get off the bed, but relented at Daniel’s
desperate grasp. “Hey, only joking.” He wrapped his arms
around Daniel again. “Not going anywhere, squirt. Now
sleep.”

“Thank you.” Daniel buried himself against Spen’s chest.

A few quiet squeaks later and their kems had squeezed
themselves into the small remaining space between Spen and
Daniel’s bodies. Then all was silent and peaceful once
more.

Spen rested his cheek against Daniel’s head. In the

morning, Daniel would probably die of embarrassment
thinking about this conversation. That was okay. Mutual
attraction wasn’t life and death stuff. What Daniel was
coping with every day, and this shit with Noble—now, that
was important.

Still, nice to know Daniel could still feel something for

anyone after what Noble and life had done to him. And it
was nice to be one he had feelings for. Spen wouldn’t get his
hopes up. He’d enjoy a little cuddle, a little company, not
think too much about Rob and missing being with a guy he’d
cared for. Not thinking, that would be good for a while too.

Chapter 13

Daniel woke when a bored Kani decided he had slept

long enough, and began nibbling his chin. He swatted his
annoyed kem away, and his hand brushed someone’s
shoulder.

That woke him up properly. Then he remembered. Spen.

Just to confirm it, Myko peeked over Spen’s shoulder and
gave a tiny chirp, answered just as discreetly by Kani. The
kems obviously thought Spen needed more rest than Daniel
did. Or maybe they wanted to punish him for being such an
utter prat.

He slid carefully out from under the blankets and bolted

for the bathroom to pee and berate himself for stupidity.
Spen would hate him for being such a needy little bastard.
So much for trying not to be pathetic, and look like a
competent adult.

A knock on the bathroom door made him jump. “If you’re

in there freaking out, Danny boy, wait until you have a cup of
tea before you make any big decisions. I’ll go put the kettle
on.”

“I’m fine!”
“Great. I’m still putting the kettle on.”
Daniel’s face flushed hot as much from amusement as

embarrassment. Spen’s dry sense of humour had been all that
had kept him sane at times over the last few months, and it
had saved them from undying enmity over Daniel’s horrible

behaviour last night. He wouldn’t have blamed Spen if he’d
never spoken to him again. But he hadn’t just spoken to him,
but had held him. And more.

He washed his face again, and when he ducked out, found

the bedroom empty, so he could pull on his jeans.
Downstairs, Spen stood watching the kettle, still not at
boiling point. He was fully dressed, and wearing an apron. It
barely cleared his hips, which was both ridiculous and
endearing. Kani and Myko chased each other around the
living room, clearly bored with human company for the
moment.

“Hi,” Daniel ventured.
Spen turned and gave him a wide smile. “Hey, kid. How

did you sleep?”

“Better. Um.” He came closer, and on impulse wrapped

his arms around Spen. “Don’t hate me?”

He felt Spen chuckle, then he put a hand under Daniel’s

chin and made him look up. He bent and kissed him on the
lips. “Easiest thing anyone ever asked me to do,” he
murmured, stroking his hand down Daniel’s hair. Daniel
wished he could do the same back. He wanted to know what
the short crinkly curls would feel like under his fingers. He
wanted to touch Spen’s dark, warm skin, stroke him from top
to toe.

But then Spen pushed him back carefully. Daniel’s heart

sank. “Now, Danny, don’t get worked up.” Spen leaned over

and kissed him again. “Tea?”

“Please. I think there’s bread for toast, and Alex likes

cereal.”

“Tea for now. Sit and I’ll pour.” Another caress to

Daniel’s hair eased his anxiety. He sat and enjoyed the
simple pleasure of having Spen all to himself, with nothing
more pressing than what to eat for breakfast.

Spen knew how much milk to add to Daniel’s mug, and

did it without checking before putting the tea before him.
That sort of cosy, domestic touch could be dangerously easy
to grow used to. Spen took a seat and a long slurp of tea,
before regarding Daniel with a serious expression. “I had a
thought, just before.”

“About us?”
“Yeah. I told you, don’t get worked up, kiddo.”
“How many of your fingers do I have to break to stop you

calling me that?”

“Three?” Daniel made a face at him. “Look, just drink

your tea and listen, okay? I know how I said you were in
control here...and you totally are....”

“But you don’t really like me that way, right?”
Spen set his mug down with a heavy sigh. “Apply that

scientific mind of yours to the available evidence, Danny
boy. Do I look like someone who’s gone off you?” He
reached over to stroke Daniel’s wrist, smiling kindly.
Daniel’s heart fluttered a little. He’d always thought that was

just a saying, but no, he felt it in his chest.

“No,” Daniel managed to get out. “But...?”
“But, you suspicious sod, I was thinking about the court

case.”

Daniel made a face and pushed his mug of tea away. “Oh

thanks. I was almost feeling okay.”

Spen increased the pressure on Daniel’s wrist, using his

thumb to massage the back of his hand. “Hang on a little
longer, kid. All I was thinking is that I’ll have to give
evidence against Noball, and they might ask me why I got
involved. About what my relationship is with you.”

“And...you want....”
“To be able to answer truthfully that we’re just friends.”
Daniel sagged. “Oh.”
“Friends who hug a lot.”
Daniel grinned. “Kissing too?”
Spen’s smile spread like a sunrise. “Maybe now and

then.”

“Well, if it’ll help put the bastard away....”
“I think it might. I don’t want to give them any wriggle

room.”

“I understand. Um....”
Spen held his hand up. “How about more tea and maybe

toast before any more big stuff, okay?”

“I’m not five, Spen.”
“Wasn’t talking about you, Danny boy. I’m a growing

lad.”

~~~~~~~~

Good intentions and sensible reasons couldn’t stop Spen

patting Daniel’s shoulder when the kid bumped hips with
him, or letting their hands stay in contact a little longer than
they needed to when they reached for the honey at the same
time. “Just friends?” Daniel said, a ginger eyebrow cocked
cheekily.

“Yes, you brat. Knock it off.”
Daniel’s good mood lasted until they cleared up the

breakfast things, and while they sat on the sofa, watching the
kems and enjoying being together with no demands on them.
But just as Spen wondered if he should make another pot of
tea, Myko, who’d been chasing Kani across the room and
around the bookshelves, knocked a piece of paper off the
coffee table. When Spen bent to pick it up, he realised it was
the pamphlet about counselling. It couldn’t be the one he had
from the hospital, because that was sitting on his bedside
table, back at his parents’ house.

He went to put it back on the table, but Daniel stopped

him, taking it from his hand. “No, let me have it. This is what
I wanted to talk about before.”

“Danny?”
Daniel smoothed out the pamphlet. “I’ve been

thinking...maybe you were right. Wouldn’t hurt to talk to
these people. I mean, rather than put it all on you. It’s not

fair.”

“It’s not that it’s not fair, kiddo—”
“Grrrr.”
“Sorry.” He kissed Daniel’s cheek. “Don’t worry about

‘fair’. The point is, they’ve got more experience than I do.
I’m dead scared I’ll hurt you out of ignorance. I don’t know
what to expect. Neither do you. You’re strong, Danny. But
knowledge is power.” He touched the pamphlet. “I could go
with you. I mean, I’ve got questions and I don’t know who to
ask. This prosecution could take months, Shah said. It’s just
how the courts work.”

“Yeah, I know. I watch television too.”
“Oh well, then. No surprises for you.” Daniel punched

him lightly on the arm. Spen pretended to be mortally
wounded, but Myko spoiled the effect by jumping into
Spen’s lap and whacking him in the face with his tail. Spen
picked his kem up and brought him nose to nose. “Watch it,
fuzzball.” He put the pest down on his lap again and wagged
his finger at him. Myko batted it with a paw. It was simply
impossible to reprimand a kem.

“Would you really come along with me?”
“Sure. When?”
“Today? This morning?”
“Why not? The kids get back this afternoon. What are you

going to tell them about your job?”

Kani leapt up onto Daniel’s shoulder. Daniel pulled his

kem down onto his chest so he could pet him properly. “I’ll
have to lie. Dee can’t afford distractions. But I’m rubbish at
lying to them.”

“So tell them part of the truth. Tell them Fuckface is

suspended because he’s been buying illegal drugs, that
they’re investigating him further, and you’re on leave so the
police can strip the office. No need to say more. After all,
the police haven’t charged him with more than that at the
moment, so it’s not a lie.”

“No. I’ll have to try and be convincing. I should get

changed, I suppose.”

“How about I call them while you dress, see if we need

an appointment or anything?”

Daniel thanked him. Spen couldn’t help but notice the

burst of energy which had propelled him to make the
decision about the rape centre, had disappeared. Still, he
hadn’t changed his mind yet, so Spen would encourage him
as long as Daniel didn’t actively resist the idea.

The centre did require appointments for counselling, but

strongly advised Daniel to come in and talk, get information,
and arrange to meet someone later. “Has he been tested? For
STDs?”

“Not yet,” Spen said.
“We can help there too. Please, do bring him down.”
Daniel came in five minutes later, neatly dressed in an

ironed linen shirt and sharp trousers. Spen felt distinctly

grubby next to him, but Daniel didn’t seem to care. He came
over, his stance inviting a hug, so he got one.

Spen told him what the centre said. “I’m not doing

anything about tests until next week.”

“I’m sure that’s okay. Are you? Okay, I mean?” Spen

tilted Daniel’s head up and searched his face for any sign
that he was freaking out.

“Mostly. It’s going to suck but I need to do it.”
Spen bent and kissed him. “Good for you. Come on.”

~~~~~~~~

Without Spen beside him, Daniel would probably have

never made it inside the rape crisis centre, let alone allow a
strange woman talk to him about intimate matters. It felt like
he was making something he hardly believed had happened,
into reality. Spen held his hand, and asked questions when it
became too much for him. Even with that, Daniel felt like a
used dishrag by the time they stepped out into the sunshine.

“A pint?” Spen suggested.
“You’re driving. Coffee and early lunch? On me, no

arguments.”

“None from me, Danny.”
Daniel wished he could show Spen how much he loved

being called by that name. Loved it even though it made him
sad too. A good sad though.

Spen knew a coffee shop not too far away that served

reasonable food, so they left the car in the carpark and

walked. It didn’t feel right to be here on a working day, men
of leisure only because someone had tried to carry out an
attack on him. The sunshine felt good on his face, though. “Is
it wrong to feel good that I might never have to go back to
that office?”

“No,” Spen said. “You were mad enough about that last

night though.”

“I really need a job. But I think I might die if I had to do

that one again, even if it wasn’t working for him.”

“Danny, you’re a clever, wonderful person, but Myko

would make a better PA than you.”

“Hey!” Daniel’s indignant protest matched Myko’s

irritated squeak.

Spen grinned, and ushered him into the coffee shop. He

managed to distract Daniel by asking him to order, but after
they had ordered and paid, and found an outside table,
Daniel pinned him with a glare. “What do you mean about
me being a bad PA?”

“I never said that. But it’s like asking a dolphin to power

a motorboat. It’s a pointless waste of your talent, and there
are people who would do it just as well and enjoy it more.”

“I’ve explained this to you.”
“Yeah, yeah, the qualification thing. There has to be a

way we can sort that out for you.”

“‘We’?”
“I’d like to help.”

“I don’t see how you can.” Daniel’s mobile rang. He

didn’t recognise the number. “I better get this. Daniel here.”

“Daniel? It’s Inspector Shah. How are you doing?”
“Fine, thank you. Is something wrong?”
“No, not at all. I’m calling to say that we’ve charged

Tony Noble with rape as well as the other charges we
discussed.”

A prickle of adrenaline ran across Daniel’s scalp. Spen

reached over and took his hand. Daniel was grateful for that.
“Uh, okay.”

“He’s still in custody, but he’ll probably be bailed

tomorrow.”

“But you can keep him away from me and my family,

right?”

“Yes, you and any other witnesses. We’ll insist on that as

a condition of bail, and the magistrate won’t have a problem
with that. Then there’ll be a committal hearing in a couple of
months.”

“What if he, uh...comes near me?”
“You call the police. He can be thrown back into custody

if he tries that.”

“My brother and sister?”
“If he approaches them, we’ll see that as an approach to

you. We can arrange for police patrols to swing past your
house randomly and you should make sure your brother and
sister know what to do if they’re the least bit worried. I can

arrange for an officer to chat to them if you want. We also
made it clear to Noble that the case doesn’t rest on your
testimony, so that means attacking you would be pointless. I
think it’s unlikely he’ll harass you. It would hardly help his
case.”

“No. Uh...thanks for letting me know.”
“No problem. If you have any questions about the case,

you can call me.”

“Thank you.”
Daniel hung up. “They’ve decided to go with the...you

know...charge.”

Spen squeezed his hand. “That’s good.”
“He’s going to get bail.”
“Okay, well, that’s not too unexpected. He won’t come

near you, Danny.”

“How do you know?
“Why would he? Your testimony isn’t the only evidence

against him, and the police have enough to get him on some
serious shit without it. If he tries to threaten you, then the
police will haul him in.”

“He might not stop at threatening. I’m worried about Dee

and Alex.” Daniel’s chest was tight with unwelcome familiar
rising panic.

“Okay, I understand. Daniel, calm now.”
Daniel gulped. “Sorry. I wasn’t expecting...they did

mention bail, but it’s all sooner than I expected.”

“Yeah, same here.”
The waitress set their food and drinks down. Daniel

thanked her, but his appetite had fled, though Kani as usual
found the food fascinating. Spen was watching Daniel.
Maybe waiting to see if he was going to melt down, Daniel
thought sourly. “I’m okay,” he snapped.

“Oh...sorry, I was just thinking. When do Dee and Alex

start the summer break?”

“Week after next. Why?”
“Well, if you’re not working, you can keep an eye on

them, but didn’t you say something about your aunt offering
to have them?”

“I am not sending my brother and sister away!”
“Shhhh. God, Daniel, calm down.”
Daniel looked at his plate, where Kani was nosing under

a spinach leaf. “This isn’t up for debate, Spen.”

“I know. I wasn’t suggesting that. But maybe they could

go stay with her over the holidays. By the time the break is
over, the committal hearing might even be over.”

“I don’t know if Aunt Lisa would agree. But the trial will

be months and months after that.”

“Yeah, but if he’s going to try anything, he’ll probably do

it sooner rather than later. Worth thinking about, anyway.”

Daniel nodded. He’d grown so used to not considering

his extended family in his plans, other than worrying about
whether he should send the kids to their grandparents or not,

that his overseas relatives hadn’t even entered his thoughts.
“I guess it would let me look for a job without worrying
about them worrying about me.”

“That too,” Spen said, a little distractedly.
“I do need another job.”
“Yes, I know. One step at a time, squirt.”
“Kani, bite him.”
Myko lifted his head from where he’d stuck it into Spen’s

fruit juice and squeaked at Daniel, whether in encouragement
or disapproval, Daniel didn’t know. Kani ignored them both.
Spen just grinned. “No respect,” Daniel muttered.

Spen ruffled his hair. Daniel pulled away and frowned at

him. “Not in public, you thug.”

“Oh sorry, your majesty. Eat your food before Kani

distributes it to needy people.” Kani squeaked in annoyance.

Daniel poked at the salad. “Maybe I should hold off on

the job hunting for a month or more. I don’t feel like I can
sell myself right now.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”
“No, but I still feel like damaged goods. Guess I’ll end

up with a generic reference after all.”

“Wait until you speak to Mr Stern, and don’t do anything

until you clear it with Zachary. Julian says Zachary is a
brilliant lawyer. If anyone can squeeze a good deal from
those tightwads, he can.”

Daniel nodded again. His life was on hold. Waiting for

Tony to be tried. Waiting for the company to fire him.
Waiting for Spen....

Spen said Daniel was in control, but then he’d gone and

decided that they would just be friends, without even asking.
Okay, he had good reasons but...a trial could be a year or
more away. Maybe he was using it as an excuse. Daniel
hadn’t exactly given him a lot of room to manoeuvre.

“Danny? You okay?”
“I’m fine.” He picked up a forkful of food and ate it. “So

what will happen to Cross-Channel now?”

“I’m sure I don’t give a flying fuck. I’m more worried

about you.”

“Well, don’t be. Things are under control. I’ll email my

aunt tonight and see what she says. I’ll call Zachary, tell him
about the new charges, and ask him about the bail thing. And
next week, I’ll talk to Stern.”

“And get tested.”
Daniel shrugged. “Yeah. You don’t need to worry.”
Spen cocked his head like Daniel had said something he

didn’t understand, then shrugged. “Okay.”

They ate the rest of the meal in silence, to the obvious

confusion of the kems who kept giving them worried little
chirps and squeaks as they nosed around the table. They
wanted to play, that much was clear, but they wanted to stick
close to their humans too. Finally, Kani and Myko both
climbed into Daniel’s lap, forcing themselves up under his

arms so they could peer into his face with identical
expressions of concern. Spen laughed, and Daniel couldn’t
help smiling.

“What do you mischiefs want, hmmm?” He petted them

both, and Myko snuggled into his hand. Kani snuggled into
Myko instead.

“They don’t want you to be sad,” Spen murmured.
“Neither do I, but I can’t just click my fingers and make it

all go away. I wish I could.”

“No, you can’t, but you don’t have to do it on your own,

either.”

“I do at least until the trial is over.” Spen frowned and

looked about to say something, but Daniel cut him off. “Look,
I really should get moving. You need to pick up your mum, I
need to do some shopping and cooking. And cleaning,
because I don’t want Dee to think she has to lift a finger
before Monday or the whole of next week. I should call my
grandmother, email my aunt—”

“I understand. You’re busy. So let’s go.”
Perversely, Spen’s brusque efficiency, walking out of the

café ahead of Daniel, taking the lead on the walk back to the
car, hurt. Daniel was only trying to prove that he didn’t need
a nanny, and that he wasn’t expecting Spen to solve all his
problems.

They were back at Daniel’s house in twenty minutes.

“Uh, do you want to come in?” Daniel asked.

“Not if you’re busy. There’s a few things I could do for

Mum and Dad since I’m around.”

“Oh.”
Spen turned to look at him. “Danny....”
“Yeah?”
“I, uh...um...let me know if you hear from Shah again,

okay?”

“Sure. Guess I’ll see you around.”
“Yeah.” Spen reached over. Daniel thought he was after

something in the glovebox and by the time he realised it was
his hand Spen was after, the moment had passed. “You look
after yourself, kiddo.”

“Bye.” Daniel got out of the car before the conversation

got tangled up again. He waved cheerfully as Spen drove off,
and wondered why, if he was supposed to be in control of
this situation, he felt so lost.

~~~~~~~~

“Shit,” Spen cursed softly as he drove up to the

intersection. What had gone wrong? One minute all was fine
and cheerful and friendly with Daniel, next minute the kid
closed up tight. What had he done, or not done? Or was it
nothing to do with him at all?

This was what he’d tried to tell Daniel before—about not

knowing what he was doing. But he thought it had been going
pretty well up to...well, up to when it stopped going well.

He needed advice, so when he arrived home and parked

the car, he called the only person he could talk freely with
about Daniel and his situation. “Beanie! How did you get on
last night?”

“Uh, that’s kind of why I called, Julian. Are you free this

afternoon?”

“No, sorry. Leo’s got appointments. Why don’t you come

over for supper?”

“Will Zachary be okay with that? I don’t want to

intrude.”

“I’ve got him trained. He hardly ever kills and eats

visitors now.”

Spen grinned. “That’s reassuring. Six?”
“Yeah. Zachary won’t be home but we can talk while I

cook.”

“You’re cooking? Wow.”
“Remind me why I like you?”
“My charm and extreme height?”
“Must be. See you at six, Beanpole.”
The prospect of talking to Julian, and maybe even

Julian’s canny boss and his scarily smart husband, helped
ease Spen’s anxiety slightly. So did throwing himself into
cleaning the bathroom, mopping all the linoleum floors, and
doing a thorough vacuum on the carpeted surfaces. When he
finished, it was time to pick up his mother. She knew as soon
as she saw him something was wrong.

“Oh, love, what happened?” she said as he set off.

“I really don’t know, Mum. He’s up and down. Maybe

that’s normal.”

“I think so, Spencer. He’s not had very long to adjust.”
“No.” Spen thought about telling his mother about the

added emotional component, but he didn’t know he wanted
to violate Daniel’s privacy to that extent, when his mother
was still involved in caring for Daniel’s siblings. Since he
wasn’t sure exactly how Daniel felt about him now, and how
to describe his feelings, there was a certain amount of
cowardice in that discretion.

He did tell his mother that Noble was to be charged with

rape. “And how does Daniel feel about that?”

“He’s worried about Noble coming after the kids. I can’t

say it’s totally not going to happen.”

“You hear some terrible stories. Can we help? I’d hate

anything to happen to those children.”

“He’s looking into some ideas, but if you can offer to

keep an eye on them, I think he’d be grateful. The risk is
probably small, but Noble is a real creep. A really
dangerous creep.”

His mother shuddered. “And a man with a wife and

children. Do they know, do you suppose?”

“They do now. Frankly, I think she should pack the kids

up and run like hell, but who knows what she’ll do. I’ve got
more than enough to do worrying about the people I know
and care about.”

His mother didn’t say anything, but she patted his knee

sympathetically. He didn’t want to burden her too much with
the ugliness of this business. For two weeks, he’d been
struggling to cope in secret with what he’d learned about
Noble and his predatory crimes. What he’d learned had been
done to Daniel, and to two other young men he’d worked
with, had given him nightmares. He didn’t want to inflict that
knowledge on his mother more than was absolutely
necessary.

She was delighted at the clean floors, protesting he

shouldn’t spend his day off doing housework. He didn’t tell
her that it was either that or go nuts worrying about Daniel
and the whole clusterfuck. Instead he just kissed her cheek.
“Don’t tell me you wouldn’t do it. Anyway, it’s not a favour,
because I live here too.”

“Glad to have you, love. Are you here for supper, or are

you going back over to Daniel’s?”

Spen hid a wince. “Actually, Julian invited me over, so I

thought I would go. I’ll take a taxi though.”

“That’s nice of him. Daniel’s with the children, I

suppose. I wonder what he’ll tell them.”

“No idea. We talked about it, but I don’t know what he

finally decided. So I’ll, uh, go shower and change, and see
you in the morning.”

Spen hadn’t been over to Julian’s new digs, though he’d

heard about them. He appreciated the swish neighbourhood

and architectural beauty of the building where Julian and
Zachary lived, but on the whole, he wouldn’t want to live
there. His parents’ place was a nice, comfortable, middle-
class home, and he’d never wanted more. Still, he was happy
for his friend, moving up from a fairly grotty flat to a lovely
apartment with a great friend and boss, not to mention the
stunningly handsome, if somewhat reserved spouse.

Myko and Pyon immediately ran off to make mischief

elsewhere in the apartment. Julian handed him a glass of
chilled white wine, and told him to sit on the other side of
the counter while he did things to vegetables. “Okay, what’s
made those brown eyes blue, Spen?”

Spen ended up spilling everything—what had happened

the night before, the revelations about their mutual feelings,
the visit to the rape crisis centre, lunch, the call, everything.
Not long after he started, Leo wandered in, accepted a
somewhat smaller glass of wine from Julian, and made
himself comfortable in an armchair near the kitchen, petting
his little white kem while listening without comment to what
Spen was saying. Neither he nor Julian looked all that
surprised when Spen admitted that he and Daniel had been
nursing mutual crushes, and when Spen said that he didn’t
know why Daniel had turned all stiff and unfriendly over
lunch, Julian just shook his head and grinned.

“What’s so funny?”
“You were with Rob too long, I think. This is how it goes

when you’re still feeling each other out. You’ve just
forgotten. Right, Leo?”

Leo smiled. “Well, dear boy, it’s a while since I’ve had

to deal with this kind of thing too, you know. But Spencer,
Julian’s right. Even without the complication of this terrible
affair with his employer, love is surely a terribly confusing
business for a young man like Daniel, especially one who
seems to have been rather sheltered and devoted to study. I’d
be surprised if he’s experienced in such matters at all.”

“Love? We’re not talking about that,” Spen said.
“Not yet,” Julian said, still grinning. “Relax, Beanpole.

Sounds to me like he has way too many things going on in his
head. He really likes you—blind Freddy could tell that—and
you really like him. Give him more than twenty-four hours to
adjust.”

“Oh.” It hadn’t even been that long, actually. It had just

felt like longer.

“Not to mention,” Leo said, “if he has been nurturing

these feelings for some time, especially over what has to
have been a most trying period, he’s probably terrified of
making a mistake with you. Just as you are, for different
reasons. As the more experienced partner in this
relationship, you may have to make allowances and take
control of things for him.”

“I said he was in control. I don’t want him to feel like

I’m pressuring him, like Noble was.”

“But, my dear fellow, if you back off now, having

declared your affections, he might see that as a lack of
enthusiasm. His self-confidence is rather low, I noticed. Not
surprising, when he was doing a job for which he was ill-
suited, which ended so disastrously, and now he’s being
forced by the judicial process to see himself in the role of
victim—for the second time, since he’s involved in this
tedious suit against the crane company. You and I may know
that he has a multitude of fine talents and has done rather
well at keeping his family together despite the tragedy of his
parents’ death, but he needs time to recover and see himself
more positively.”

“See, I’d like to help there too, but I don’t know what to

do. He’s ruled out going back to finish his degree and
without that, he can’t work as an engineer.”

“Ah,” Leo said. “Actually, this is something Julian and I

have discussed today, but we need Zachary to give us the
benefit of his legal experience before we can come up with a
proper plan.”

“Zachary?”
“Don’t worry, Spen,” Julian said, drying his hands on a

towel. “Leo’s on the case. You don’t need to worry about a
thing.”

~~~~~~~~

The kids had gone to bed an hour ago. They’d taken the

news about Tony and the job more calmly than Daniel had

feared, swallowing the half-truth as complete truth because it
was so awful, they didn’t need to imagine anything worse.
Dee was still worried about the finances, of course, but
Daniel was able to wave that away by saying things weren’t
settled with the company yet, and he thought they would have
another position there he could fill, at least temporarily. Not
a lie, exactly—it was always possible they did, even if
Daniel would rather chew off a foot than work there any
more. The most important thing was not distracting Dee from
these crucial exams. He thought he’d managed to avoid that
pretty well.

Suggesting a trip to Aunt Lisa’s rather than a summer

visit to their grandparents—which, from the conversation
Daniel had had with his grandmother earlier, looked unlikely
anyway on account of his grandfather’s condition—had
thrilled Alex, while Dee was torn between worrying about
the cost, and growing excited about a possible overseas trip.
Daniel had emailed their aunt hours ago, and now sat in front
of his computer half waiting for an answer, while doing
everything he could to avoid going to bed.

He’d mucked things up again, hadn’t he? Spen was trying

to give him space and not mess up the court case because he
knew how much it mattered to Daniel, but Daniel had reacted
like a brat, hurt his feelings, and made him feel unwelcome
just when Daniel needed him most. If Spen never came over
again, it would only be fair punishment.

Kani meeped at him from his lap. Daniel stroked him.

“You guys are so much smarter than me. Kems always know
what we’re thinking.”

Kani squirmed out of his light grip and jumped onto the

desk. “Careful. Some of that’s fragile.” Kani turned and gave
him an old-fashioned look, as if to say that Daniel didn’t
need to remind him about something so obvious. Thinking
back, Daniel wondered if the spilt tea in Tony’s office had
been as accidental as it looked. Kems were, apart from all
their other many talents, excellent judges of character. Kani
and Myko hated Tony from the start. Daniel should really
have paid attention to that.

“What are you up to now?” Kani was nosing around with

a little more intent than usual among the models and
notepads. “No food in the bedroom, squirt. You know that.”

Kani ignored him. Daniel shook his head and went back

to surfing the net, looking for statistics on rape cases and the
effects of GHB. Not the happiest topics, but he found it hard
to think about anything else.

The incoming email chime made him jump, but when he

saw it was a reply from Aunt Lisa, a little bit of tension
eased. She was enthusiastic, as he hoped she would be given
her grand but unrealistic offers after the accident, and was
offering to pay all the costs of the flights and expenses while
the kids were there. She had even offered to buy whatever
clothes the kids needed for the different season, which was

probably unnecessary, but it meant packing didn’t have to be
too stressful. He didn’t care if such generosity resulted from
a guilty conscience or not—all that mattered was that Dee
and Alex would be safely out of harm’s way for nearly two
months. He emailed back to say he was delighted at her
offer, and asking how she wanted them to arrange flight
bookings and so on.

Two months in the house alone. It would be hard, but

since he could hardly tell Dee or Alex what was really
behind his insomnia lately, losing their company was less
important than ensuring their safety. He’d just have to cope.
There was always....

Except maybe there wouldn’t be Spen. Daniel hadn’t

given him much incentive to put up with his nonsense, and
whatever mild affection Spen felt for him, might already
have evaporated now he’d had to deal with the reality of
Daniel’s crazy life.

Kani squeaked. “What’s up, squirt?” Daniel went to pick

him up, but his kem fought furiously to be left alone. “Okay,
okay, calm down. What’s wrong?” Kani squeaked again and
pushed something out from under the notes Daniel had been
making. His phone. “It wasn’t lost, Kani. Thanks for finding
it though.”

Kani squeaked again, and stamped on the phone, actually

pushing one of the keys. Fortunately the keypad was locked.
“Stop that,” Daniel said, picking the phone up and putting it

on the other side of the computer. “What’s up with you,
hmmm?”

Kani jumped across the keyboard and started stamping on

the phone again, squeaking like a crazy thing. “Bloody hell,
what’s got into you?”

Another stamp. “Is the phone annoying you? I’ll turn it

off.” He went to pick it up but Kani nipped his hand. “Now
that’s really not on, squirt. What?”

Kani walked over to the keyboard and began banging on

it. Daniel was about to lift him off and scold him properly
when he realised what key Kani was hitting. ‘S’.

Daniel stared at his kem in astonishment. “You’re trying

to tell me something?” Kani squeaked, his tail lashing. “‘S’
for...Spen?”

Kani meeped and did a somersault. Daniel had never

seen his kem do anything like it before. “What about Spen?”

Kani jumped back over to the phone and nudged it

towards him. “I can’t, squirt. It’s late.”

Kani put a foot on the phone and squeaked angrily, his

tail erect and stiff with annoyance. “God, you’re persistent.
He doesn’t want to hear from me, and not at this time of
night.”

Kani pushed the phone over to Daniel at such speed he

had to catch it before it fell off the edge. “Look, I’ll text him,
okay? Will that suit your highness?” Kani meeped and
nodded. Not for the first time in his life, Daniel wondered

just how damn smart kems really were. Probably a lot more
than anyone gave them credit for.

It was after eleven, and even though it was a Friday night,

calling someone whose routine he barely knew at this time
was not acceptable, whatever tantrum Kani threw. But
Spen’s text message tone was pretty discreet, Daniel
recalled. It was unlikely to wake him up, so he could risk
that, he supposed.

But what to say? “Sorry for being a dickhead?” Or

maybe, “Thanks for suggesting the thing about my aunt?”

Neither was the kind of thing which justified a late night

text. Or, for that matter, Kani’s weird behaviour.

His kem watched him intently with bright, mischievous

eyes. He stamped his foot again as if to say, “Get on with it.”

“You’re a pain, you know that?”
Kani lay down, head resting on his paws, like butter

wouldn’t melt in his terribly maligned mouth. “You’re not
fooling anyone.” Kani’s tail flicked disdainfully.

Daniel stared at his phone. The only thing he really

wanted to say to Spen was the one thing that would probably
drive him away. Maybe he should say it anyway, get it over
with. Better now than when he had come to rely even more
on Spen. When losing Spen’s friendship would become a
wound too great to bear.

~~~~~~~~

Spen was staring at the ceiling, trying to stop his busy

brain from cycling over the events of the day and the last
week, when his phone gave a quiet ‘tink’. He was tempted to
ignore it, but Myko reached over from the pillow and batted
the phone with his paw. Spen had to catch it to stop it falling
on the ground, and the screen told him the incoming message
was from “Danny”.

He opened it. All it said was, “I don’t want to wait.”
The kid had to be awake. Spen called his number.
“Hey. I thought you’d be asleep.” Daniel sounded

completely alert.

“I’d like to be, but my brain has other ideas. Um...Danny,

I don’t want to wait either.”

A pause, then Daniel said slowly. “So what about the

trial?”

“I was over at Julian’s tonight, and I asked Zachary about

what would happen if—in theory—our relationship changed
before the trial started. He said so long as I was sure none of
my actions were motivated by or appeared to be motivated
by malice, and I told the exact truth in court, it should be
okay. I should tell Inspector Shah too, in case he needs to
know. He also said that so far as he could tell, my evidence
was a very minor part of the case.”

“Really?”
“Yeah, really. So I don’t want to wait, and I don’t need to

wait. The only question left is...what do you want?”

“You,” Daniel breathed into the phone, and Spen smiled,

his heart lighter than it had been all day. “Is that all right?”

“Better than, Danny boy. How are you doing? How did it

go with Dee and Alex?”

“Okay. They accepted the story. Oh, and my aunt is happy

to take them over the holidays. We just have some details to
sort out and then they can fly out.”

“Oh that’s great. Uh...but that means you’ll be on your

own.”

“Will I?”
“Only if you want to be.”
“I don’t want to be.”
“See, that was easy.” He heard Daniel laugh. “Want me

to come over now?”

“Um, yeah, I do, but it’s not a good idea. Dee will

wonder and I don’t want to distract her. But if you’re not
busy tomorrow, I said I’d take Alex down to the skate park,
and then out for lunch, so Dee can have peace and quiet.”

“I’d love to come. But will you sleep tonight?”
“Hang on.” He heard the phone being set down, and the

distant sound of Kani chirping. A few more seconds, then
Daniel was back on the line. “Okay, I’m in bed now. Can we
talk until I’m sleepy?”

“Sure. Unless I fall asleep first.”
“Myko can turn the phone off.”
“Kems can’t use phones, Danny.”
“Don’t you be too sure about that....”

~~~~~~~~

The kids greeted the news that the trip was on with shouts

and hugs, but almost immediately, Dee began to fret. “Visas
—”

“Electronic and already applied for. Your passports are

up to date, and you don’t need vaccinations or anything like
that.”

“I won’t have time to pack!”
“Yes you will, I promise. You just take what clothes you

have, your normal toiletries and stuff, and Aunt Lisa will buy
anything else when you get there.”

“But—”
“Nope, you’re not going to let this distract you from your

prep. Leave it to me. I promise it’ll be fine.”

“Don’t worry, DeeDee,” Alex said. “Me and Daniel will

sort it out. Trust us.”

Dee smiled ruefully. “Okay. I don’t have a choice. Oh

this is going to be wonderful! I wish you were coming along,
Daniel.”

“Me too, Dee, but there’ll be other chances. Oh, by the

way, Alex, Spen’s coming with us today. Is that okay?”

“Sure! That’ll be great.”
“And me stuck revising.” Dee’s mouth twisted miserably.

“I like Spen too.”

“Well, he’s going to stay over tonight and help me cook

one of his mum’s recipes, so you can take the night off and

relax. You need that too.”

Her expression changed in a flash. “Yay! I love his

mum’s food. But hang on....”

Oh, so she had noticed. “What?”
“He’s staying over? Why?”
“Because I want him to.”
“Daniel, are you going out with Spencer?”
“I just told you, DeeDee, he’s going out with Alex and

me this morning.” Daniel ate his toast and tried to keep an
innocent expression on his face. Lili looked at Kani, and the
two kems chirped knowingly.

Dee punched his arm. “You know what I mean. Is he your

boyfriend?”

“We’re...working on it. Do you mind?”
“Are you kidding? I love Spen.”
Alex nodded. “He’s really cool. And tall. I like tall

people.”

Daniel grinned. “He’s definitely tall. So, you’re okay

with it? Good, because I really like him. Please don’t tease
him.”

“We won’t,” Dee said, pouring herself tea and sipping it

demurely. “We’ll tease you instead.” She ducked his mock-
smack and danced away from the table. “Got study to do. See
ya!”

Daniel shook his head, though secretly he was delighted

at how well his brother and sister had taken his news. If

they’d objected—not that he’d expected them to—there
would be no future with Spen. No way would he put anyone
before Dee and Alex, no matter what he felt about them.

But he didn’t have to worry now. Alex leapt on Spen as

he came through the door. “Hello, Daniel’s new boyfriend!”

Daniel hid his face in his hands. “Shoot me now.”
“It’s okay, Danny,” Spen’s voice was full of amusement,

not irritation, fortunately. “Alex, you’re embarrassing the life
out of your brother.”

“Yeah, isn’t it great? Are you going to kiss?”
Daniel put his hand on his brother’s head and forced him

to face the wall. “Yes, and you’re not looking.”

Spen, grinning so wide his face looked about to split,

bent and dropped a kiss on Daniel’s cheek. Daniel, still
making Alex look away, raised an eyebrow. “That’s it?”

“No.” Spen took him into a hug, and kissed him on the

mouth, long and deep. Daniel rose up on his toes to meet the
embrace, and didn’t mind that releasing his grip on his
annoying brat of a brother meant Alex could turn around, fold
his arms and watch them, grinning in satisfaction.

“Enjoy the show?” Spen asked over Daniel’s head, still

holding him in a hug.

“Dee is going to be so jealous.”
“Keep this up and it’s a Saturday morning in front of the

cartoons for you,” Daniel threatened.

“You promised!”

“That was before you started being a royal nuisance.

Scoot. Skateboard, helmet and guards, or we’re not going.”

Alex thundered off up the stairs to his bedroom, leaving

Daniel blissfully alone with Spen. “Sorry about that. They
were pleased when I told them, but you know what kids are
like.”

“Don’t worry. If I can survive Luke and the others, Alex

is no challenge.” He stroked the hair off Daniel’s face.
“How are you? Sleep well?”

“I did, and in my bed too. Thank you. Did you?” Spen

didn’t look as tired as he had done lately. Daniel realised
rather guiltily that he’d been so absorbed in his own misery
that he’d been oblivious to Spen’s feelings.

“Better. Wish I’d been with you. Are they okay with me

staying over tonight?”

“Are you kidding? Dee practically sent up fireworks.

Um, you might have to play up to expectations. She deserves
a nice night off.”

“No problem. I like her, and I want to help. I might be

slightly fonder of her brother, though.”

Daniel hugged him again and claimed another kiss. God,

holding him, being with him, was sweet. “Good. Is that your
pack? Just dump it in the living room. I promised Dee we’d
cook that pork and apple thing your mum makes. We can pick
up the makings on the way home.”

“Fine by me. I’m just happy to be with you.” Spen looked

into Daniel’s eyes. “I’m glad you sent that text. I was bloody
miserable before that.”

“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it, Danny. It all came right in the end.

Where’s that brother of yours?”

“Alex! Hurry up or we’ll go without you!”
Alex’s answer came floating down the stairs. “You’re a

mean sod, Daniel!”

“Mind your language, or I’ll hide your skateboard!”
A few seconds later, Daniel’s phone told him he had a

text. From Alex. “(_*_) <--Daniel”

“Well, that’s a new one on me,” Spen said, struggling not

to grin.

“I should make him stay home for that. Where does he

pick up this kind of thing?”

“Relax, Danny. The longer he takes, the more kissing

time I get with you.”

“Well, now you mention it....”

~~~~~~~~

The weather was as dry and bright as anyone could want,

after weeks of on and off rain and showers. The skate park
was full of kids, and Alex quickly hooked up with his
friends. Spen spotted a seat under a tree where he and Daniel
could keep an eye on Alex, without hovering too close and
making Alex look ‘uncool’ to his crowd. The shade was
important because Daniel was the whitest white person Spen

had ever seen, and less than ten minutes in full sun turned
him bright pink. Their kems took off to play with the leaf
litter, apparently deciding their humans could be trusted not
to mess things up again.

“What would you be doing if you weren’t here?” Daniel

asked. He’d cuddled right up to Spen’s side and taken his
hand as soon as they sat down. He was a lovely weight
against Spen, fitting perfectly. He and Rob had been great
together in bed, but Rob hadn’t been much for public
cuddling. Shame, really.

“You mean apart from worrying about you?” Daniel

poked him in the side. “Stop that, brat. Not much. I try to stay
offline on the weekends, give my brain and eyes a break. If
Mum and Dad are going somewhere, sometimes I head out
with them. Or I find a coffee shop and read the papers. Go
for walks. Visit friends. You know, ordinary stuff.”

“What about when you were with Rob?”
“You really want to talk about that, Danny?”
Danny looked up into his eyes. “Um...maybe not. I,

uh...haven’t been with anyone before. This is all new.”

“Hard to believe when you’re such a cutie. Ow.”
“I am not a ‘cutie’.”
“You definitely are. All that lovely hair, and those big

green eyes, and that pretty way you walk. Ow! Stop it.” He
rubbed his side. “Can’t a guy compliment his boyfriend?”

“‘Pretty walking’ isn’t a compliment, you prick.”

“Maybe not. You didn’t hook up with anyone at school?

What about Uni?”

“No. I was always busy. There were other gay guys

around, and some of them were friends, but...they were
nerds, which was great, but other than that, and the fact we
were all gay, I didn’t have a lot in common with them. None
of them....”

When he realised Daniel wasn’t going to finish, Spen

poked him. “What? None of them...?”

“Made me feel like you do,” Daniel said in a rush, then

turned pink.

Spen grinned, then decided the only response to that was

to kiss him. Daniel’s arms went around Spen as he threw
himself into the kiss. For someone who claimed he hadn’t
done it before, he was a fast learner.

“Guys, can you knock it off? You’re embarrassing.”
Daniel didn’t even turn around to look at his brother. “An

hour ago you couldn’t get enough of this and now you’re
complaining?”

“Yeah, cos it’s outside now. People can see. It’s so not

cool.”

“Spen, shall we stop?” His lips tickled Spen’s neck as he

spoke.

“Hmmm, I don’t think so. Go play with your friends,

Alex. We’re busy.”

“I hate you,” Alex said. “You’re horrible.” He stomped

off.

Daniel chuckled. “And before it was all, ‘ooh, Spen’s so

great, he’s sooo tall and we love him sooo much’.”

“I’ll try to struggle on with my disappointment. Now

where were we?”

They kissed a little longer, but mindful that Alex wasn’t

the only person who might find a couple pashing on a park
bench a little much on a Saturday morning, Spen eased back
to just holding Daniel. Daniel didn’t seem to mind, and when
Kani and Myko came back for cuddles and petting, he held
them on his lap while Spen kept his arm around him. “I
wasn’t really expecting you to be so comfortable with me,”
Spen said, smiling at Myko splayed out on his back along
Daniel’s thighs, inviting a tummy rub while Kani groomed
his tail. “Not after what Fuckface did in the office.”

“You don’t remind me of him in anyway. You look

different, sound different—smell different. If I never had to
smell that stinky cologne of his again, I’d be grateful.”

Spen froze. That was what that smell had been that night.

The smell on Daniel.

“Is something wrong, Spen?” Even Myko had sat up to

look at him.

He made himself relax, and nuzzle against Daniel’s hair.

“No, nothing. But I can promise you I’ll never wear anything
like it—I’ve never even liked aftershave.”

“Good. I think I’d be sick if I smelled it again. Shoo, you

two. Go find Veen and pester him.” He put the two kems on
the ground and they ran off in search of Alex’s kem. Alex
himself had apparently recovered from the shame of his
brother’s public display, and was attempting a jump which
made Spen wince a little in concern. Daniel didn’t seem too
bothered though.

“Um, Spen?”
“Yes, Danny.”
“Does it bother you that I, uh, haven’t...you know...been

with someone before?”

“No, why should it? I’m more worried that you might

think we have to do stuff before you’re ready. Which you
really don’t. Now what’s wrong?” Daniel’s smile had
disappeared and he was now staring off into the distance.
Spen stroked his hair. “Danny?”

“I don’t know how I’ll feel. This is lovely, being with

you. I could do this all day. But I don’t know what’ll happen
if we...I mean, when we sleep together.”

“We already did and it was fine.” Spen kissed him again,

and held him closer. “Nothing will happen until you want it,
and nothing will happen that you don’t agree to. We have
plenty of time, and I’m in no hurry. It’s not like I don’t know
what it’s like.”

Daniel flushed. “What if I suck? Compared to Rob?”
“He sucked quite often, actually.” Spen watched Daniel’s

face until he got it, and grinned when the poke arrived on

cue. “You don’t have to be the world’s greatest lover to
make me happy. Or the other way around, I hope. I just want
to be with you, hold you, let things happen when they’re
ready to. Neither of us know how much what happened to
you will affect things, so we need to take it slow and easy.
I’m all for easy.”

Daniel smiled, a little tremulously for sure, but he looked

less miserable. “I don’t want to be the poor pathetic—”

“Yeah, yeah, orphan victim blah blah. I don’t want you to

be either because I’m not really into sleeping with pathetic
people. Be yourself, Danny, even if that means being
neurotic or uncertain or scared or whatever. I like you. All
of you, even the sad, bad parts. Okay?”

“Okay. Wow, you’re really good at this, aren’t you?

Being a boyfriend, I mean.”

“I took a class and everything.”
Daniel grinned, and Spen stole another kiss. There would

probably be rocky times ahead, but Julian was adamant that
talking about things was much, much better than not talking
about them in a relationship with an inexperienced partner.
The clincher came when Zachary agreed with him. Even Leo
had sat up and given his nephew a startled look for that
admission. Spen would bet half his savings that Zachary had
started out a lot more fucked up than Daniel would ever be,
and now he was comfortable and happy in a stable, loving
marriage. There was plenty of reason to hope Daniel would

cope with this new change in his life, even with the crap life
kept throwing at him. Spen planned to do his best to keep the
crap levels down. Daniel could do with the break.

Just as Spen was thinking a nice cup of tea would be

nice, Alex came over, flopped onto the bench and declared
he was “starving”.

“You had breakfast two hours ago,” Daniel said.
“Three,” Alex corrected, his bottom lip drooping. “And

I’m thirsty.”

“Water fountain over there. Off you go.”
“You’re mean.”
“Yes. Go get some water, and then we’ll find somewhere

cheap for lunch. Which means back on the High street, not
here because they charge a fortune in the park.”

Alex heaved a sigh but did as Daniel said.
“I’d be happy to pay for—”
Daniel held up his hand. “Thanks, but no, Spen. Alex

knows I don’t have a job and we have to adjust our budget
until I find another one.”

“But I—”
“Besides the food here is all fried rubbish. We’ll have a

better, cheaper choice outside.”

“Oh. See, that’s why you’re the parent, not me.”
Daniel sagged. “I don’t know how Mum and Dad did it.

Thinking about all this—what they should eat, where they
should go, are their friends safe, and so on and so on—wears

me out. And that’s before I wonder if that weirdo over there
who’s been watching the kids for the last half hour is a spy
for Tony or not.”

Spen hadn’t even noticed. The guy wasn’t a tramp but he

was wearing the kind of eccentric clothes that indicated
either a mental disorder or other incapacity. “I think he’s
harmless.”

“Yeah, so do I. But I don’t know.”
“Did you warn them?”
Daniel nodded. “Yeah. Didn’t explain about all the

charges, but I said I would be a witness and Tony has a
screw or two loose. Dee got it without needing any more
explanation. Alex was happy enough when I said all I
wanted him to do was make sure he was always with his
friends, and not to go off with anyone unless they were a
police officer with proper ID, or you, me or your parents.
He’s pretty sensible, though it doesn’t always look that
way.”

“He’s sensible compared to most adults I know. I’m sure

they’ll be fine.”

“I’d be happier if I knew Tony wasn’t being set free

some time today. Why can’t they keep him in jail?”

“Because he doesn’t have a criminal record, he’s not a

flight risk and he hasn’t threatened anyone. I asked Zachary.
He said intimidation is pretty rare, and it’s more common in
violent offences. Anyway, sending them away for a while

will be good for all of you.”

“For them, for sure.” He climbed to his feet. “Come on,

Alex. I thought you wanted lunch.”

Alex hopped on his skateboard and propelled himself

over to them on the pavement, the three kems giving chase.
“Edward asked me if I could come back this afternoon.
Please, Daniel?”

“When?”
“After one? Just for two hours. Please?”
“Do you mind, Spen?”
“Me? No. I’m all yours.”
Daniel kissed him. “I told you to stop that,” Alex said,

folding his arms and glaring. “It’s girly.”

“Hmmm, Spen, do you want to tell Dee he said that, or

shall I? Alex, if I were you, I’d start running now.”

“Girly girly girly!” he shouted as he made his escape

through the trees.

Daniel did nothing whatsoever to chase after him, though

he did begin to walk at normal speed in the same direction.
“I have no idea what my parents would say to him right
now.”

“Something like what you did,” Spen said. “The more

fuss you make, the more he’ll play up to it. He’ll get tired of
it eventually, and I have no intention of not kissing you in
public because your little brother might be slightly
bothered.”

Daniel put his arm around Spen’s waist. “Good because I

have absolutely no intention of letting you stop.”

~~~~~~~~

By three o’clock, Alex’s friends had grown tired of

skateboarding, and wandered off to other pastimes. Alex
clearly wanted to go with them, but to Daniel’s relief, he
didn’t put up a fight when Daniel told him they needed to go
home instead. He had got over his snit about Spen’s remarks
in the morning, and he and Spen walked together a little
ahead of Daniel, talking about skateboarding—about which
Spen knew a lot more than Daniel—and about powering up
some of his mechanical models, about which Daniel knew a
lot more than Spen. Daniel didn’t interrupt. He wanted his
brother and Spen to get on, so Alex could see Spen as a
trusted friend in case anything happened to Daniel himself.
He also, selfishly, wanted Spen to get on with his brother
and sister because that would bind him to them, and to
Daniel.

Spen didn’t resist the process at all. He listened to Alex

as seriously as he would to any adult, while happily teasing
him like the kid he was when Alex left him an opening. He
could say things that would lead to sulks and badly hurt
feelings if Daniel said them, simply because Daniel shared
so much history with Alex. Spen didn’t have that, so Alex
looked afresh on what he said, assessing them without
prejudice. Alex had eagerly seized on Spen’s father as a

wise, objective adult he could bounce ideas off. Spen
offered someone else, someone closer to his age, Alex could
use as a sounding board.

They gathered up the ingredients for the cheap but

delicious pork and apple bake, Spen insisting on buying the
cider which wasn’t strictly necessary but which would add
an extra fillip to the meal. Some reduced price custard and
half price bananas would make a tasty dessert for after.
Daniel grabbed some other bargains, and refused to allow
Spen to pay for any of it. “After all the meals your mother’s
made for Dee and Alex, you must be joking.”

Spen held his hands up. “Just trying to be polite.”
“Thank you, but so am I. You can help me carry the bags,

though.”

“I thought that was why you brought Alex.”
Alex’s kem squeaked in amusement as his human pouted

at the remark. Still, Alex grabbed two bags without being
asked, and Daniel ruffled his hair, thankful there wasn’t an
ounce of real meanness in his body.

Though Daniel and Spen insisted they were preparing the

supper, Dee came in to watch. “My brain’s full. I keep
looking at the words, and nothing’s going in.”

“Then stop,” Spen said. “I get like that at work. I stare at

code and it’s gibberish. The only thing to do is go home, try
it again the next day with a fresh brain. You can’t force it.”

“You know the stuff, DeeDee,” Daniel said. “You’ve had

good results in these subjects for two years. So it’s in your
head. Spen’s right.”

“I know. It’s about psyching myself.”
“Even top athletes rest the day before a big competition,”

Spen said. “Can’t do your best if you’re tired. So you
shouldn’t work so long tomorrow. Stop earlier, do something
different, go to bed early.”

“You sound like Mum.”
“There’s a reason for that. She was right and so’s Spen.”

Daniel put his arm around her shoulders. “Why don’t you
make some tea, and watch how this is made so you can
remind me next time.”

She glanced in the direction of the stairs. “I should be

packing....”

“Next weekend. Relax. Talk to Spen. Poor guy’s had to

listen to me and Alex bending his ear all day.”

She grinned at them, before picking up the kettle to fill at

the sink. “Oh like that’s such a hardship. I bet Spen could
listen to you talk all day and all night.”

“Not true,” Spen said, waving the paring knife at her. “I

need to sleep too.”

“Oh right. That’s why I heard Daniel talking in his

bedroom until one in the morning. Talking to himself, was
he?”

“Oh, burn, Daniel,” Alex said, grinning madly. “You’ve

got it bad.”

“You don’t have any idea what that even means,” Daniel

said, resolutely ignoring the teasing, even though his face
was heating up again.

“I do. I had to watch you two kissing all day.

Smooching.” He made an exaggerated kissing sound until
Daniel swatted at him to stop.

“And I missed it,” Dee said, sighing dramatically.
Daniel rolled his eyes. “Spen, do you want to go out for

supper?”

“Oh toughen up, kid.” Alex hooted with laughter, until

Spen smacked him on the arse. “And you knock it off too,
brat. Leave your brother alone. We don’t exist for your
amusement.”

“Well, what good are you?”
Dee put her hands on her hips. “Alex, do you want to eat

on your own? Beans on toast?”

Daniel and Spen looked at her in surprise. Alex wrinkled

his nose. “You can’t make me, duh.”

“No, but I can ask Daniel and Spen to not give you any of

this lovely meal they’re making, and we can all go out over
to his place and eat it there. Right, Spen?”

“Absolutely. In a heartbeat. In fact, Danny, we should

pack it all up. Mum won’t mind.”

Daniel pretended that he was indeed going to do this.

Alex wailed, “But I’m hungry!”

“Then you better choose. Food or fun,” Spen said.

“Food!”
“Dee? What’s your decision?”
“Going to behave, Alex?”
“I was only teasing,” he muttered. “Okay.”
“Fine, then we can keep on cooking,” Daniel said. But

then he hugged Alex. “We’re only teasing you too,” he
whispered, before kissing his brother’s head. “Just lay off
Spen a little, for me, okay?”

Alex nodded. Dee continued her tea-making as if nothing

had interrupted her at all, and by the time she set out mugs
and a couple of biscuits apiece for everyone, Alex was back
to normal, and Spen chatted to him cheerfully as he had done
all afternoon.

The food met with everyone’s approval, and there was

enough for a second meal, which was a nice bonus. After
supper, they sat on the floor in the living room, while Alex
hauled out one of his interactive games for them all to play
on the TV. It was now sadly outdated, with no prospect of
newer ones to replace it until Christmas, but Spen declared it
to be one he hadn’t played before, so he and Dee took one
side, Daniel and Alex took the other. Daniel didn’t really
like computer games much, but he found himself getting into
this one. The two teams ended up being fairly evenly
matched, Daniel and Alex losing the first three rounds, until
finding their stride and running away with the game in the
end. He gave Alex a high five and grinned at Spen and Dee.

“Looks like brains beats beauty every time.”

Dee launched herself at him, knocking him over. “Grrrr,

are you calling me dumb, brother of mine?”

“Well, compared to me and Alex.... Ow, you little...Spen,

help!”

“What’s that? Alex, did you hear something?”
“No, don’t think so.”
“Alex, help me or I’ll tell her what you said this

morning.”

Alex grabbed Dee around the waist and hauled her off.

“Careful, Dee, he’s the only Daniel we’ve got.”

“So he’s got the goods on you, huh? Men.” She stood up

and dusted herself off. “Took two of you to beat me.”

“Only because I didn’t want to hurt a girl,” Alex said.
“Ooops,” Spen murmured.
“Better start running, Alex.” Daniel grinned as Dee

chased him into the kitchen. “Don’t suppose you could make
us a cup of tea while you’re up?” he called after them.
“Don’t kill each other!” No reply. “Oh well.”

“They’ll be fine.” Spen crooked a finger at him. “Hey,

come here.”

Daniel raised his eyebrows but obeyed. “What?”
“Haven’t kissed you in ages.”
“Oh. Well, get on with it.”
Spen tasted like apples and pork and cider and cheesy

toast. Daniel liked it. “Mmmm, yummy.”

“So are you. How are you doing?” He pulled Daniel

against him, arm around him possessively as they leaned
against the sofa.

“I’m...happy. I’ve had a wonderful day, thank you.

Supper was lovely.”

“You bought it and made it. I just helped. I had a great

day too.” He kissed Daniel’s temple. “Think you’ll sleep all
right tonight?”

“If you’re with me, I will. Don’t know about when I’m

alone.”

“We’ll have to see how it goes. No reason I can’t be with

you whenever you need me, at least in the short term.”

What did he mean by that? “Are you going to stop coming

over?”

“No, Danny. I just meant, sometimes I might not be able

to come over, or you’re busy or whatever. We don’t have to
live in each other’s pockets. Not that your pockets aren’t a
lot of fun,” he added, tickling Daniel a little and making him
squirm. “I’ll be here as much or as little as you need me. As
you want me. Okay?”

“Okay.” They kissed again, Daniel running his hand

lightly over the back of Spen’s head, enjoying the feel of hair
so very different from his own. “Things have gone awfully
quiet in there.”

Spen sniffed the air. “No blood, no smoke. It’s always

possible they’ve strangled each other....”

“At least that’s quiet. Spen, don’t let me take up all your

time. I don’t want to be one of those clingy boyfriends.”

“I thought you didn’t know about boyfriends.”
“I said I hadn’t had one before. I’ve seen plenty of

people with them, girls and boys. Some guys are dopey.”

Spen laughed. “Yes, they are. I promise I’ll tell you if I

have something else I need to do, or even if I just need to be
alone for a bit—so long as you promise not to take that as a
hint that I’m trying to break up with you. If I feel I don’t want
to be with you, I’ll tell you to your face. I want you to do the
same. I don’t do messing about or passive-aggressive
bullshit. Can’t stand that kind of thing.”

“I’ll try to be straight with you.”
“Not too straight,” Spen said deadpan. Daniel poked him

for the terrible joke. Spen had hundreds of them, and he
wasn’t afraid to use them.

Chapter 14

Spen stayed the rest of the weekend, though they all came

over to the Reardons’ house for supper at Mrs Reardon’s
invitation. Despite all the advice she’d had, and despite
Daniel’s reassurances, Dee had worked herself up into a bit
of a state by four on Sunday afternoon. Fortunately, Mrs
Reardon had raised three sons through the stress of exams,
and had dealt with hundreds of students, so she knew exactly
what to do, taking Dee in hand, distracting her, and giving
her tired, overloaded brain a chance to refresh and rest.

Spen came over every night that week too, eating with

them, sometimes cooking, sometimes bearing a dish he’d
made at home. Daniel couldn’t believe how quickly they fell
into an easy, relaxed routine, and how readily he became
part of their evenings. It helped Dee, having someone to take
her mind off the pressure she was facing, and Alex calmed
down too. Their little brother was worried about Dee, and
about Daniel’s job, but Spen had a way of putting things that
made it all seem reasonable and bearable.

Each night they climbed into Daniel’s bed and held each

other. Things hadn’t gone any further than that, and cuddling,
and kissing. Daniel didn’t want any more yet. He worried
sometimes that Spen wanted more than he was getting, but
Spen gave him not the slightest hint that he did, and seemed
to be perfectly content as they were. Kani and Myko were
the biggest clues that Daniel didn’t need to fret—they settled

down together every night at the head of the bed, curled
around each other in a tight furry ball, and every morning
they jumped on their humans to wake them up in good time to
get on with the day. He had no doubt the hints if Spen
weren’t happy would be as unsubtle as kem hints tended to
be.

And then it all changed, because it was suddenly time for

Alex and Dee to fly away to their aunt. Spen took the
morning off to drive them to the airport, though Daniel had
said it wasn’t necessary, and then waited with him until it
was time for the kids to head through security. Dee was
crying. “I’m going to miss you, and be so homesick.”

“For about a day,” Daniel joked, though his eyes were

full too. “Then you’ll be having such a great time, you’ll
forget about us completely.”

She threw her arms around him. “Never ever,” she

insisted. “I’d never forget you.”

“That’s good, DeeDee,” he murmured in her ear. “Now

wipe your face and cheer up, for Alex. I’m counting on you,
remember.”

“Won’t let you down, I promise.” She scrubbed her face

on her sleeve, and tugged on Alex’s shirt. “Ready?”

“Yeah.” Alex launched himself at Daniel. “You won’t

die while we’re gone, will you?”

“No, squirt. I promise. Spen’ll look after me.”
“He better or I’ll...I’ll hurt him!”

Daniel squeezed him. “None of that, Alex. You have a

good time, look after Dee, and I expect an email once a
week.”

“Once a day!”
“We’ll see. Now, off you go. Have a wonderful time.”
Spen hugged Dee and ruffled Alex’s hair. “I’ll watch him

for you, kids, don’t worry. He’ll be here in one piece when
you get home.”

“Promise?” Dee said.
“Cross my heart and hope to be reborn a tapeworm if I’m

lying.”

Dee laughed, and that allowed Daniel to gently nudge her

and Alex towards the security line. “Go on. Give my love to
Aunt Lisa and Uncle George, and the cousins.”

“Bye, Daniel. Bye, Spen.”
Daniel and Spen watched until they passed through the

metal detector, and were swept along by the crowds of
waiting passengers behind them. Then Daniel wiped his
eyes, and blew his nose. “God, I’m going to miss them.”

Spen hugged him. “Yes, but it’s not forever. We better

get going if you’re to have time to change and come back into
town with me.”

Today was the day when one of the several pending

boots in Daniel’s life finally dropped. Mr Stern had called
the previous week to talk to him about his employment, but
on learning that Zachary was acting as Daniel’s legal

advisor, the situation became much more formal. Letters and
emails had been exchanged between Zachary and the
company’s solicitors, and today was the meeting, at the
company’s solicitors’ office, where Daniel’s future would
be decided. He knew what had been offered, what had been
counter-offered, and most of what had been rejected. What
he didn’t know was what was the final offer on the table.
He’d find that out today.

He and Spen had a quick early lunch at the house, then

Daniel changed into a suit, and they dropped the car back at
Spen’s place before catching the bus into town. Daniel was
grateful the meeting wasn’t to be at the company’s offices.
He could imagine how nasty the gossip had become there
since the report in the papers the week before about one
Anthony Winton Noble, aged forty-nine, office manager,
being charged with a range of offences including sexual
assault and rape. Though Daniel’s name had been kept out of
the reports as promised, the office rumourmongers would be
able to piece things together without much help. Spen refused
to confirm or deny what he’d heard. He said Daniel was
well out of that situation and what a bunch of small-minded
idiots thought, no longer mattered. He was right, of course,
and on one level, Daniel didn’t care. On another, he hated
that people who didn’t know him and didn’t like him, were
making free with his private life, as if they had any business
with it. It felt more violating in some ways than what Tony

had done to him.

The meeting was at two. Zachary met him in the foyer. As

usual he looked cool, superior and gorgeous. Daniel felt
rumpled and gauche next to him. “Your brother and sister
departed safely?”

“Yes, thank you. Uh, is this going to be awful?”
Zachary gave him one of his enigmatic smiles. “Have

more faith in my abilities, Daniel. Why is Kani not out?”

Linis was, as he nearly always was, draped regally

across Zachary’s shoulders. “I thought he might, uh, give the
wrong impression.”

“On the contrary. Not showing your kem indicates

insecurity and fear.”

“Then that’s accurate.”
“Come now, Daniel. You’re in a position of strength if

only you’d realise it. Call Kani out, and let him ease your
nerves.”

Daniel did as he suggested, and damn the man, he was

right. Kani’s presence on his shoulder, the gentle
encouraging chirps in his ear, did help. “Are we ready?” he
said after he gave Kani a prolonged petting and cuddle to
apologise for misreading things so badly.

“Of course. I’m always ready. This way.”
Julian was a lucky man, Daniel thought. But Daniel was

luckier.

~~~~~~~~

Daniel was already in the pub when Spen arrived at five.

The kid was nursing a half pint of bitter, although he’d barely
touched it. Did the alcohol mean things had gone badly, or
did the fact that he hadn’t drunk much mean it was just
cover? Kani sat on Daniel’s shoulder, but Spen couldn’t read
anything from the little kem’s posture, and Myko’s greeting
didn’t indicate anything either.

Spen slid in on the seat beside him. “Hi.” Myko hopped

down onto the table and Kani joined him to be groomed. Still
no sign of distress. Had to be a good sign, right?

Daniel smiled tiredly. “Hi. Why don’t you get yourself a

drink?”

“In a minute. Well?”
“It’s good. Really good. Get your drink and then I can tell

you.”

Spen waited impatiently for his pint to be poured, then

came and sat next to Daniel again. “Spill.”

“Oh, before I start, Zachary says we’re to go over to his

place for supper. I gather it’s more of a command than an
invitation.”

“He just tends to put things like that. Julian called. It’s

okay with me—you?” Daniel nodded. “Right, no more
delays. Tell me.”

“Well, the company were being bastards until Zachary

started making serious noises about a sexual harassment suit
—and he’s working with Jan to seek compensation too, did

you know? Anyway, once he started talking about the figures
he’d be seeking on my behalf, their solicitors got worried.
So the upshot is that I get a favourable agreed reference, four
months’ salary and pension contributions, plus fifteen
thousand as compensation for the ‘pain and suffering’,”—he
made the quotes with his fingers while rolling his eyes
—“Zachary’s legal fees to be paid, and all medical and
counselling costs to be covered, no matter when they come
up.” He took a long slurp from his beer while watching Spen
over the rim of his glass.

Spen sagged in relief. “That’s great! Is that what you

wanted?”

“Considering they were only talking about a reference

and a month’s salary before, yeah. Zachary said we’d get
more if we sued and won—”

“But you can’t guarantee you’d win, and the stress would

be awful.”

“Exactly. He said the case was as strong as he and his

colleagues had ever seen, but sexual harassment suits are
often hard to predict. Most are settled before they come to
court. He’s pleased. I’m pleased because it means Jan’s
position is stronger now. They’ll have to offer him something
similar, and he needs it, poor guy. Zachary says he’s actually
more screwed up than I am about it because he couldn’t tell
anyone. Apparently he cried all over Julian, did he tell you?”

“Yeah, he said. Oh good.” He lifted his glass. “And you

never have to go back to the company again.”

Daniel touched his glass to Spen’s. “No, thank God.”

Kani chirped happily and Myko did a somersault. Spen
stared at his kem in amazement. “They approve.”

“Yeah, they do. I’m so pleased, Danny.”
“Oh, and get this. Stern wanted me to sign a non-

disclosure agreement but Zachary told him to bugger off
because we were talking about criminal acts, and I couldn’t
be forced not to disclose details of a crime. So in theory I
can go to the press and make a big stink but there’s no way in
hell I’m going to. Jan might, though. Wouldn't blame him at
all.”

“He’ll probably want to keep it quiet too. Even if he’s in

the right, companies can be really old-fashioned about hiring
staff who sue employers.”

“Yeah. It was more the look on Stern’s face and his

solicitors when Zachary faced them down. He’s awesome.”

“He really is.”
“Linis just yawned at Stern and he went white. It was like

he thought Linis was going to eat him.” Daniel grinned.
Seeing his boyfriend happy made Spen smile, especially
when Daniel had been so miserable that morning. “Zachary
said six.”

“Yeah, that’s cool. We can finish our drinks and walk

over. It’s not far from here. Just across the park.”

Daniel suddenly reached up and loosened his tie, then

tore it off and stuffed it into his pocket. “I never want to
wear one of those damn things again. Reminds me of going to
Mum and Dad’s funeral far too much. And Tony.”

Spen stroked his hand. “We need to get you back to what

you really love. No, don’t say it. Plenty of time to plan and
talk about it.”

“Okay. Right now, this takes the pressure off for a little

bit. It’ll take me forever to get another job so this helps a
lot.”

Spen wished he was rich enough to say to Daniel, “You

don’t need to worry about a thing, I’ll look after you,” but he
wasn’t, and besides, Daniel wouldn’t accept. He was
fiercely determined to support himself and his family on his
own, which Spen couldn’t exactly fault him for.

“Drink up. It’s a lovely evening and the park’s cool and

shady. Kani and Myko will enjoy it.”

The kems did love the park, with all the places they

could nose around, the leaves they could play with, and the
occasional greetings they could deliver to other kems, whose
humans were also enjoying the green peace. Spen loved it
too, but for different reasons. He could walk holding
Daniel’s hand, and even kiss him occasionally, without
worrying too much about what the idiots at the office thought.
Sure someone might see him, but the risk was greater at the
pub. Not that he cared for his own sake, but it bothered
Daniel, and he didn’t want to give the gossip mill more fuel

than absolutely necessary.

“It’s still hours and hours before the kids land. I wonder

how they’re finding it. They were a lot younger when we
flew last time.”

“I suspect they’ll find it all a huge adventure and have a

great time. Don’t worry.”

“Not even about plane crashes?”
Spen stopped and took him into a hug. “Not even about

them,” he murmured against Daniel’s ear. “Statistically, it’s
the safest form of travel.”

“Actually—”
“Danny.”
“All right.”
Spen kissed him and they walked on. He should get out

into this space more often, he thought. The pub was fine but
fresh air and trees were better. Probably better for his eyes
too.

“I was thinking....”
“About what?” Spen prompted.
“Would it be awful of me to take over Mum and Dad’s

bedroom? I mean, it would be more comfortable with you
staying over, but it’s...well, it’s their room.”

“Which they don’t need, Danny. I don’t think they’d want

you to keep half the house as a shrine.”

“Dee would be upset if I threw out their stuff. I’d be

upset, I think.”

“Then don’t. Just use the bed, keep your things in your

room. That way you don’t have to commit one way or the
other, and you can still use that room as a guest room if you
really need to. But it’s your home, Danny. Your mother and
father would want you to use it as best you can, and enjoy it.
You can tell they wanted it to be for all you kids, a place
where you felt loved and happy.”

“They did. Dad always said he would never move unless

he had to go into a nursing home.” Daniel smiled rather
wanly. “Guess he managed to avoid that, at least.”

Spen kissed Daniel again and wiped the moisture off his

cheek with his thumb. “Not really much to set against losing
them.”

“No. But you’re right. They wouldn’t want us to make the

house a shrine. I won’t disturb the closets and things, but we
can use the bed. Uh...if you want to.”

“You can see the size of me and you wonder if I’d like

the idea of sleeping in a bigger bed?”

Daniel grinned. “See your point. So where’s their

place?” They’d reached the edge of the park. Kani and Myko
ran back and climbed up onto their shoulders, because clever
kems let their humans negotiate hot road surfaces and busy
traffic for them.

Two minutes later they were riding in the elevator up to

Zachary and Julian’s apartment. Not Julian and Leo’s
apartment, which was on the floor above. Apparently Julian

bounced happily between the two. Spen didn’t fully
understand the arrangement but then he didn’t need to.

Zachary opened the door. “Welcome, Spencer, Daniel.

Please come in.” His dignified greeting was spoiled
somewhat by the way his kem, Linis, squeaked in delight to
see Kani and Myko. The three of them jumped down onto the
floor for a cuddle, joined in seconds by Pyon and Leo’s little
white kem, Nuji.

Zachary stared at the kem ball in amazement, and Daniel

burst out laughing. “He’s a kem, Zachary. Some things are
hardwired.”

Zachary recovered. “Indeed. Do please take a seat.”
From the kitchen counter, Julian waved in greeting. “Hey,

Beanie. Daniel, thanks for coming. Sorry for the short notice
but I wanted to wait until this crap with your bosses was
sorted out.”

“That’s fine, and thank you.”
“Go and sit with Leo. I’ll be about an hour with food,

because Leo wants to talk to you. Zachary too. Zachary, wine
would help, I think.”

“Of course.” Spen smiled at the way Zachary took the

chance to give Julian a quick kiss as he went to the fridge,
but then noticed how worried Daniel looked. Fuck. Spen had
an idea what Leo wanted to chat about, but Daniel didn’t. He
slung his arm around Daniel’s waist. “It’s okay,” he
whispered. “Go sit.”

Daniel gave him a queasy smile, then headed over to the

sofa near the armchair where Leo was waiting for him.
“Come and sit, dear boy. Forgive me for not standing. I had a
double hip replacement a month and a half ago and I have to
confess, I find it a nuisance to keep getting up and down,
even if I’m supposed to stay mobile.”

“Listen to him,” Julian said. “The damn man wears me

out walking all over the place. I’m grateful when I can get
him to sit still for five minutes.”

“Such a disrespectful fellow,” Leo said, though his smile

was affectionate. “And, ah, I should also ask your
forgiveness for that trick we played on you the other day. I
believed it was necessary, but I would understand if you
were angry.”

Spen joined Daniel on the sofa but carefully didn’t say

anything. Daniel shook his head. “No, I’m not angry. I
understand it now. It was all just...horrible.”

“Yes, it was, and I’m so sorry, dear boy. You should

never have been in that position, and it’s utterly disgraceful
that Edward Stern allowed that situation to develop not just
once, but three times, right under his nose.”

“I think he’s got the message now, thanks to Zachary.”

Daniel accepted a glass of wine from Zachary and toasted
him with it. “You da man.”

“Oh. Thank you, I think.”
“It’s a compliment, Zachary. Thank you from me too.”

Spen lifted his glass to Zachary too, and grinned as a flush
crossed the man’s pale chiselled cheeks.

“Come and sit, Zachary,” Leo said. “Well, now we’re all

comfortable, I can start. Daniel, I asked you over partly so I
could apologise—”

“Really no need....”
Leo held his hand up. “Perhaps not, but I felt it should be

said. But my main purpose was to talk to you about how you
ended up in that terrible man’s clutches in the first place.
Spen tells me that prior to your parents’ sad death, you were
a brilliant student with a glittering future in engineering
ahead of you.”

“He exaggerates.”
“I do not,” Spen insisted. “You won prizes and

everything.”

Daniel shrugged. “I told you why I dropped out.”
“Yes, you did,” Leo agreed, “and you had excellent

reasons at the time. But things have changed, and I firmly
believe it’s time you returned to your studies, gained that
qualification, and got on with the career for which you are
manifestly more suited than working as a PA. Just as Julian
makes a superb assistant and doubtless a fairly mediocre
engineer, the reverse is true for you.”

“There are two reasons I can’t do that, Leo. One, I can’t

leave my brother and sister to go back to the place where I
was studying, and two, I can’t afford the fees or to be out of

work for so long. What?” Daniel looked around and saw the
grins on the other three faces. “Okay, Spen, what have you
been cooking up behind my back?”

“Nothing, I swear. It’s all Julian, Leo and Zachary. They

told me to butt out.”

“Nothing so vulgar,” Leo said, but his smile only became

more devilish. “Daniel, the university where you were
studying isn’t the only place in the country which offers that
degree, is it?”

“No, but—”
“Nor, as I have since discovered, is it the only institution

which offers modules in your particular fields of interest.
Were you aware that in the coming year, Bentall University
here is offering an electrical engineering degree with a major
in robotics and prosthetics, and in fact the lecturer who will
be taking charge of that is the same one who taught you at
your original place of learning? He’s been recruited and
offered a professorship. Quite the feather in his cap, I
understand.”

Daniel stared. “Dr Woolley?”
“Yes, indeed. I have also had Julian investigate, and late

enrolments for mature students are still open for another
week. I know it wasn’t your first choice four years ago, but
things have moved on.”

Daniel turned to Spen. “I could study here? Without

leaving the kids alone?”

“Yep. Even do some of it by evening study if you want to.

Danny, you just need to enrol on that course, then you can
apply for summer internships and job experience. Dad says
the council offers a few places and he’d be happy to put a
good word in for you.”

“And I have one or two useful contacts in that line,

Daniel,” Leo said. “I have one firm promise of a summer
placement if you enrol, based on your existing results, and I
can probably arrange others.”

Daniel’s dazed expression was beginning to worry Spen.

The kid had had to deal with a lot of shocks recently and
maybe this was one too many. “Danny? What do you think?”

“It’s great...but I still can’t afford it, or to support Dee

and Alex.”

“Ah, this is where I come in, if Leo doesn’t mind,”

Zachary said. His uncle waved him on. “As a mature student
with dependents, you’re eligible for grants and allowances
that you weren’t eligible for as a dependent student. You
have this settlement from your employer, which will give
you a cushion for six to eight months. Further, with your
permission, I contacted your solicitors handling the case
against the construction company, and enquired as to the
progress of the case. There is no dispute that the company is
liable at least for some damages—the main point of
contention is the apportionment of blame between them and
their subcontractors, and how much, if any, will be awarded

in punitive damages. However, there is an agreed minimum
that they will certainly be liable for, and your lawyers agree
that should you instruct them to do so, they could ask the
defendants to make a small interim payment, on account of
what they will have to ultimately pay. Even ten percent of the
agreed minimum would easily cover your living costs and
fees.”

“And should all that fail,” Leo said, “I would insist on

offering an interest-free loan to assist you. Because, Daniel,
nothing saddens me more than young people not reaching
their potential, and when their potential is so great...well,
it’s shocking.”

“Before you refuse that help,” Spen jumped in to say,

because Daniel had that stubborn look on his face, “you
should think about the fact that you can earn a lot more as an
engineer, and so you’ll be in a much better position to
support Dee and Alex when they want to go to University
themselves.”

“Precisely,” Zachary said in his cool voice. “It would be

selfish to deny them out of some misguided principle.”

“Now don’t bully him, Zachary,” Julian said, coming to

sit by his husband. “It’s more important that it’s the career
that will make Daniel happy, and what makes him happy,
will make Dee and Alex happy.”

Daniel opened his mouth, then closed it. “Drink some

wine, dear boy,” Leo said. “And please don’t let any of us,

including my nephew, force you into anything. I know it’s a
lot to think about.”

“And he’s not used to the Underwood method,” Julian

said, grinning at his boss. Leo lifted his glass in salute.
“Anyway, why don’t we talk about something else, give
Daniel a chance to digest it all? Daniel, I have a folder of
information for you which you should read. The only really
urgent deadline is the enrolment on this course if you want to
do that.”

“I do. If I can afford it, I really want it. Dr Woolley is

brilliant. I really enjoyed his classes.”

“Well then.” Leo beamed at him. “Just do it, as they say

on television. You have enough money in the bank to go
ahead. Even if you refuse all help and your savings take a hit,
in the long-term, it’s an investment in your future you simply
cannot afford not to make.”

“Spen?”
Spen took Daniel’s hands. “I agree with them. Damn it,

Danny, it’s what needs to happen. Dee and Alex will agree
with me. Dee’s told me a few times how sorry she is that you
had to give up your studies. Alex just wants you to be happy.
So do I.”

Daniel tried to smile but his lips trembled. Spen took him

into a hug and let him hide his face against his shoulder.
“Thank you,” he mouthed to the others.

“You’re welcome,” Julian mouthed back. “Zachary, I

need a hand with the meal. Would you mind?”

Zachary frowned at his husband for the few

microseconds it took for spousal telepathy to kick in. “Of
course not.”

“Ah, and I believe I forgot something in my apartment.

Julian, if you would help me up? Thank you.” Leo picked up
his cane. “How long to supper?”

“At least half an hour.”
“Then that gives me time to find what I forgot.” Leo

winked at Spen. “Take your time,” he said quietly.

Left alone by his considerate friends, Spen could push

Daniel back so he could look into his eyes. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Sorry.” He wiped at his eyes. “It’s just been....”
“Tough. I know. You’ve done a brilliant job looking after

them. Now it’s your turn.”

“Can I really enrol this late? What about prep reading?”
“Enrol, then talk to Dr Woolley. Don’t tell me he

wouldn’t be sympathetic.”

“He would. He offered to help when I told him I had to

drop out but at the time there was just no way I could stay.”

“Well then. And with the kids away, you’ve got time to

yourself to read up. I can help.”

“You already do. You did go behind my back though.”
“Nope, I swear. All them. I hoped they could find the

answers, but without Julian and Zachary doing the research, I
wouldn’t have had a clue.”

Daniel buried his head in his shoulder again, his arms

going tight around Spen. Kani and Myko abandoned their
friends and came over, squirming into Spen and Daniel’s
laps, squeaking and meeping for attention. Spen freed a hand
to pet them both. “It’s okay, squirts. It’s more than okay.”

Daniel leaned back. “You know, everyone keeps going

on about how terrible it was I ended up in that job and being
targeted by Tony. But since I’d never have met you, never
got together with you...maybe it wasn’t so unlucky.”

“Oh Danny. I wouldn’t want to be with anyone at that

price.”

“No, I get that. But since I didn’t have any choice...I’m

glad things turned out this way.” Kani, who’d managed to
make his way up to Daniel’s shoulder, chirped. “He agrees.”

From Spen’s lap, came another chirp. “So does someone

else.” He leaned in and kissed Daniel. “I think I might just
love you quite a bit.”

Daniel grinned, his eyes shining. “I think I might love you

too.”

A clatter of something dropped in the kitchen reminded

them that they weren’t alone. Spen smiled and moved back.
“We’ll talk about this later. Let’s go help.”

“Aye aye, cap’n.”
Kani and Myko did somersaults, then ran over to the

kitchen area to cause whatever mischief they could find.
Which, with kems, was always going to be a lot.

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