FieldingHer

SECRET

Book#1ofCorrigan&Co.

ByCrystalPerkins

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http://www.allbookedout.com/

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ABOUTFIELDINGHERSECRET

She’salwaysbeenoneoftheguys.

AinsleyMartingrewupbeatingboysatsports,andresignedherselftothefateofalwaysbeingagirl
friend,andnotagirlfriend.Transformingfromajocktoacomputernerddidn’thelpherwinguys,
butitdidgetherajobwiththeCorrigan&Co.Foundation.Astheheadofcomputersandtechnology
forthefoundationanditssecretsociety,shenormallyworksbehindthescenes,overseeingtherescue
ofwomenandchildren.Butthistime,JaneCorriganneedshertobeonthefrontlines,anditmayjust
beherundoing.Yes,sheknowsfootball,butshedoesn’tknowhowtohandlefallinginlove.

He’sneverhadtroublegettinggirlsintohisbed.

ZackTaylorlearnedearlyonthatwomenonlywantedhimforhisfame.Goinghomewiththemhas
allowed him to take his own pleasure, while knowing his heart will never be involved. Until he
mistakes a beautiful woman for a groupie and tells her to get on her knees. When she stands up to
him,heknowsthathehastohaveher.Allofher.HepursuesAinsley,tryingtoshowherhe’smore
thanwhatsheseesonthefootballfield.

Someone’s trying to sabotage the Las Vegas Legions football team, and Ainsley and Zack may
justbecomecollateraldamageifthey’renotcareful.Cantheylearntotrusteachotherorwill
thebiggestSECRETofalldestroythemboth?

OTHERBOOKSBYCRYSTALPERKINS

TheGriffinBrothersseries

GamingForLove(TheGriffinBrothers#1)

BuildingOurLove(TheGriffinBrothers#2)

CreatingALove(TheGriffinBrothers#3)

LearningToLove(TheGriffinBrothers#4)

DesigningTheLove(TheGriffinBrothers#5)

WorkingOnLove(TheGriffinBrothers#6)

Publicly, The Corrigan & Co. Foundation has been supporting women for years. Secretly, five
powerfulwomenledbyJaneCorriganhaverecruitedtenagents,sendingthemtorescuewomenand
children in need, and take down those who exploit the weak. This secret society of women all have
unique skills they’ve brought to the foundation. Additionally, they’ve all had training in weapons,
etiquette, martial arts, technology, and languages. Helping out friends and family of their five
mentorsfromtimetotimeissomethingtheyweretoldtoexpect.Whattheydidn’tplanforisfalling
inlove.

AbouttheCorrigan&Co.FoundationandtheSociety:

•MitchellCorrigancreatedtheCorrigan&Co.Foundationforhiswifeaspartofhiscompanyten
yearsago.HestipulatedthatthefoundationwouldcontinueaslongasthereisaCorriganwomanto
overseeit.

• Jane Corrigan, Cyndi Evans, Maggie Griffin, Mallory Daniels, and Helen Wilson are the
foundersofthesecretsocietywithinthefoundation.Theyfocusonhelpingwomenandchildren,
buttakeonothermissionsfromtimetotime.

• While they assist government and private organizations on a regular basis, they only take
referralsforprivatemissions.

•Eachfounderhasrecruited,andmentors,twoagents.

• The company was founded in Chicago, but has now moved to Las Vegas, where Mitchell was
born.Onhisdeathbed,heaskedhisgrandsontomovethecompanyheadquarterstohelprevivethe
economyinhishometown.Therearesatelliteofficesallovertheworld.

•Jane’sgrandson,Matt,whoisPresidentandCEOofCorrigan&Co.,knowsofthesociety.His
friendsNathanandAiden,whohebroughtinwhentheyallleftthemilitary,knowaswell.Thiswas
adecisionbythefivewomenwhentheyneededhelponamissionthatwentbad.Theydonotknow
allmissiondetails,buthelpwhentheyareasked.

This series is dedicated to Nancy Drew, Trixie Belden, Diana Prince, Kelly Garrett, Jill Munroe,
Sabrina Duncan, Kris Munroe, Tiffany Welles, Julie Rogers, Pepper Anderson, Jane Marple, Laura
Holt, Christine Cagney, Mary Beth Lacey, Jessica Fletcher, Buffy Summers, Sydney Bristow, Kinsey
Millhone, Stephanie Plum, Josie Marcus, Veronica Mars, Kate Beckett, and all the other kick-ass
women I’ve read or watched throughout my life. I thank their creators for bringing these inspiring
characterstolifeforme,andeveryoneelse!

CHAPTER1

Ainsley

I just got called into the conference room. I know what this means—I’m being assigned to a

mission.I’vedoneafewoverthepastfouryears,butnotasmanyastheotherwomen.Myexpertiseis
computers, so I usually just support everyone else while working in my office downstairs and
overseeingmyteam.I’mnotgirlyorglamorous,atall,whichlimitswhatIcandoontheoutside.

As I head upstairs in the elevator, I think about how I ended up here at Corrigan & Co. I was a

tomboy growing up. I have four older brothers, and I followed them everywhere and wanted to do
everythingtheydid.SoIplayedeverysportimaginable;IaskedforLegosandvideogamesonmy
birthdayinsteadofBarbiedollsanddresses.Itookthedanceclassesmymomwantedmeto,butonly
becauseIloveherandIknowitwashardforhertoseeherlittlegirlwantingtobeaboy.

WhenIgottojuniorhigh,Istartednoticingboysinmorewaysthanjustwantingtobeatthemona

sportsfield.Itwastoolate,though.IwasalreadyAinsley,thepersonpickedfirstforsportsteamsand
lastfordating.Idealtwiththedisappointmentofnevergettingaskedoutorkissedbygettinglostin
myvideogames,whichleadtometakingakidsprogrammingclassatalocalcenter.Iwasapparently
goodatitbecausetheyofferedmethechancetotakethecollegelevelclassesnextsession.Ifellin
lovewithprogrammingandcodingandthat’sallIwantedtodo.

Myparentssupportedme;although,Iknowtheywereworriedaboutmynothavingasociallife.I

stillplayedsports,butIneverhungoutwithanyonefromtheteams—maleorfemale—becausewhen
yougettoacertainage,ifyou’renottryingtobeagirloffthefield,youjustdon’tfitin.Atleastnot
in my schools. So I kept to myself, wearing glasses to hide my pain and baggy clothes to hide my
developingcurves.IgotascholarshiptooneoftheChicagouniversitiesandwassoontutoringother
students. I still kept to myself, but it was okay then. I was accepted because being smart was cool,
especiallywhenthehottestguyoncampuswasacomputernerdaswell.

ScottGriffinisthehumanequivalentofaGreekgod,ifgodswerecoveredintattoosandacouple

ofpiercings.Everygirloncampuswantedhim.Iwantedhim.Hisbedwasoccupiedbyalmostevery
womanoncampus.Notme,ofcourse.Tohim,Iwasjustanotherpersonwhocouldcode.Itwasjust
likewhenIwasyounger,onlynowIwasjustoneofthecomputerguys,insteadofasportsguy.Scott
wasalwaysnicetome,andIgottherespectthattheothergirlsoncampusdidn’tgetfromhim,soI
guessthat’ssomething.

It was Scott who brought me here. He asked me to meet him downtown at the C&C Chicago

headquartersacoupleofweeksbeforegraduation.I’dheardofthecompany,butIwasn’tsurewhatI
wasdoingthere.Theydon’tspecializeincomputers.Iwentbecause,well,heisScottGriffin,andI
wasn’tgoingtosayno.

Scottintroducedtometohismom,Maggie,andherfriend,JaneCorrigan.Theytalkedtomeinthe

C&CFoundationoffices.Janeisinchargeofthefoundation,whichfocusesonhelpingwomen.They
help people put their lives back together after they suffer something traumatic or survive domestic
violence.Isoonlearnedthattheyalsohelpintherescueofthosewomen.

Theydidn’ttellmethatatfirst,ofcourse.Theytalkedtomeaboutmyworkandtoldmetheyknew

Ihadagoodjoblinedup.Ilistenedastheydescribedthefoundationandtoldmethey’dlikemeto
workthereinstead.ScottsaidhethoughtI’dbeagreatfitforthecompany.IsaidI’dthinkaboutit,
andIdid.IweighedtheprosandconsanddecidedthatIwantedtomakeadifferenceandnotjusthide
behindacomputerscreen.LittledidIknowhowmuchofadifferenceIwouldreallybemaking.

Scott met me again at the foundation offices. This time, there were three other women besides

Maggie and Jane in the conference room. I was introduced to Cyndi Evans, Mallory Daniels, and
HelenWilson.I’dseenpicturesofallthesewomenateventsaroundtown,butIwasn’tsurewhatthey
were doing here. Jane started by telling me how glad they were to have me working for the
foundation.ShethenaskedmetosignasimpledocumentstatingeverythingIwasabouttobetoldwas
confidentialandthatIwouldhavetopaytenmilliondollarstothefoundationifIdisclosedanything
thatwentonthere.Itwasalittleweirdtobedoingthatforajobatafoundation,butIsigned.Ican
keepasecret.

ItwasthenthatIfoundoutwhatthefoundationreallydoes.Tenyearsago,JaneandCyndidecided

todosomethingmorethanjustbesocialites.TheysawMaggieatfunctionsfrequently;although,they
didn’tfitinasmuchasitlookedliketheydid.They’dgravitatedtoeachotheraswomenwhoweren’t
justlookingforgoodhusbands.Theywantedtomakeadifference,andMaggiesuggestedbringing
herfriendsHelenandMalloryonaswell.

Janeconvincedherhusband,oneoftherichestmenintheworld,tostartafoundationforher.He

agreed to give a significant amount of the profits from his company every year to help women in
need. Jane and her friends agreed that they needed to actually assist in getting women out of bad
situations and not just help them afterwards. The first women who worked for them were
policewomenandmilitarywomenwhoweretiredofdealingwiththediscriminationtheyhadtoface
intheirjobs.Theyhadtheskillsettohelprescuepeople.Thus,thesecretpartofthefoundationwas
started.

Overtheyears,they’veexpandedandwenowalwayshavetenwomenwhotakepartinmissions.

Eachfoundingwomanhastworecruitsworkingatanytime.We’repaidwellandcanleavewhenever
we want. Not all of us have a police or military background. We have a language expert, fashion
stylist,andevenaformerprofessionalchefontheteam.Everyoneofushadsomethingthatoneof
the five women—or in my situation, their son—saw in me and decided to cultivate. Scott actually
helpedrecruitmeforJane,whoknewshe’dneedsomeonetooverseethecomputersystemsdaily.

No matter what we specialize in, all of us are given weapons and martial arts classes as well as

trainingincomputers,languages,hairandmakeup,andetiquette.It’soverayearoftrainingbefore
they even think about putting you in charge of a team. The instructors are both current and former
teammembers,andIdon’tthinkanycompanyorgovernmentanywherecouldrivaltheexpertisewe
are given. I did well at languages, weapons, and martial arts. However, I barely passed the girly
lessons,butI’mnotsurprised.Ididpass,though,becauseyoucan’tbehereifyoufailasingleoneof
them.

So now I work behind the scenes on many missions, offering computer support which includes

hacking into security systems and banking sites. It’s not as glamorous as some of the missions the
otherwomengoon,butIknowI’mstillmakingadifference.Ican’tevenbegintocountthenumber
ofwomenwe’vesaved.Wecoveritallfromdomesticviolencetohumantrafficking.Wemostlyfind
leads from trusted law enforcement contacts or even from watching the news. We can’t save
everyone,butwedoourbest.

OneofthemostimportantthingsI’vegottenfromthefoundationisfriends.Youcan’tgothrough

thetrainingandmissionswithoutbecomingclosetotheotherwomen.Ievenletthemdressmeupand
takemeouttobarsorclubssometimes.Sincemeetingthem,I’vehadmyfirstkissandmyfirstsexual

experience—neitherwereveryexciting,butatleastIwon’tdieaspinster.They’vebroughtmeoutof
myshell,andIwoulddoanythingforanyoneofthosegirls.

I get off the elevator and walk into the conference room, expecting to just see people from our

team.I’mnotexpectingtoseeLindseyRivers,wifetotheowneroftheLasVegasLegionsfootball
team, sitting at the table. We take on private jobs occasionally that don’t have to do with women’s
issues.Usuallyit’sforafriendofoneofthewomenorareferralfromsomeonewe’vehelpedbefore.
Weobviouslykeepthe“Society”aswejokinglycallit,secret.Theagentscantellonefamilymember,
ifwewant.Itoldmymom.Andifwegetmarried,orareclosetothatpoint,wecanrevealourselves
to the person we’re involved with. The founders can tell the females in their family and one male
relative.That’showScotthelpedrecruitme.Heknowsandactuallycreatedthesoftwarewecurrently
use.Idon’tknowwhereMrs.Riversfitsin,butasafootballjunkie,I’mmorethanalittleexcited.

“Thank you for joining us, Ainsley,” Jane says with a smile. I know she knows I’m freaking out

because last week I told her I couldn’t wait for the regular season, especially since I have season
tickets.

“You can sit down,” Reina tells me with a chuckle. She’s the most senior of all of us and pretty

muchrunsthings.Jane’sstilltheoneincharge,butReinsishersecondincommandandhasauthority
overeverything.

“Ohyeah.”IgotositnexttoStella,whoislookinglikeshejustwalkedoffarunway.Shewasa

fashionmajorwhenshewasrecruitedandsighsasshetakesinmybaggysweatshirtandjeans.

“Ladies,thisisLindseyRivers.Wehelpedoneofherfriendsseveralyearsagoandnow,sheneeds

ourhelp.TheotherwomenandIhaveagreedtotakeonhercase.Thereissomeonewhoistryingto
sabotagethefootballteamherhusbandowns.They’regoingtohavetheirfirstregularseasonhome
gameinsixweeks.ThisisimportanttoLasVegas,aswellasLindseyandherhusband.Thecityhas
beentryingtogetaprofessionalsportsteamforyears.Myhusbandwantedateamforhishometown
andwasinstrumentalinthecreationoftheLegionsbeforehepassedaway.”Janepausesforamoment
tocollectherself.“Lindsey,canyouletusknowwhat’sbeengoingonandwhereyouthinkwecanget
someoneinundercover?”

“Yes.Ofcourse.Thankyouagainforagreeingtohelp.Overthepasttwomonths,thingshavebeen

happeningthatIcannolongerbrushoffascoincidences.Therehavebeendamagedcleats,medicines
switchedout,partsofourplaybookendingupinthehandsofotherteams,andnowthisweek,arack
ofequipmentwaspushedontooneofourrunningbacks,ZackTaylor.Hemanagedtojumpoutofthe
way,butitwasclose.”

ZackTayloralmostgotcrushed?Thatwouldhavebeendevastatingfortheteam.Andhimtoo,of

course.Plus,thefewwomeninthecityhehasn’tsleptwithwouldhavemissedoutonthathotbodyof
his.I’mlostinthoughtsofhisdarkhairandsexyeyesandalmostmisstherestoftheconversation.

“Yes.Thereseemstobetoomuchgoingonforittobeacoincidence,”Reinasays.
“I need your help and I think the easiest way is to have someone date a player. I was thinking of

KevinDonaldson.He’sourquarterbackandacompletesweetheart.IthinkifItoldhimIhadanice
womanforhimtomeet,he’dtakeherout.Oncetheyweredating,she’dhaveaccesstotheplayersand
staff.Ithastobesomeoneontheinsidedoingthesethings.”

“We’renotadatingservice,Mrs.Rivers,butIthinkyourideahasmerit.Areyouokaywiththat,

Ainsley?”

“Me?”
“Yes,you.Youknowmoreaboutfootballthanmostmen.You’retheperfectchoice.”
IlookatJaneandthentoLindseyRivers.Shelooksalittlehorrifiedatthethoughtofitbeingme.I

canunderstandwhy.I’mnotexactlylookinglikesomeoneaquarterbackwoulddate.NowIknowwhy
Stella’shere.She’sgoingtotransformme.Thethoughtscaresme,butexcitesmeatthesametime.I’ll

neveradmititoutloud,butIkindoflikeditwhenIlettheotherwomendressmeuptogoout.Ifelt
powerfulwhenIsawguysactuallylookingatmeassomethingmorethanateammate.Amissionthat
involvesfootballandbeingagirl—yeah,I’mtotallyintothisone.

“I’dlovetohelp.”IturntoMrs.Rivers.“IknowhowtobeagirlwhenIhaveto.Youdon’tneedto

worry.Stellawillgetmeallsetwithclothesandthings.”

“Iwill.She’saknockoutwhenwegetherintorealclothes.”
“I’mnotworried,”shetellsmewithasmile.Icockaneyebrowatherandshelaughs.“Okay,well

maybeIwasalittleworried.ItrustJane,though.Ifshethinksyou’retherightchoice,thensodoI.”

We go over a few more details and agree that I’ll be introduced as the daughter of one of her

collegefriendswhojustmovedtotownandislookingforajob.Lindsey—assheaskedmetocall
her—tellsmethatshe’dlikemetoattendacocktailpartyatherhomeonFridaytomeeteveryoneand
getthingsstarted.I’llhaveonlytwodaystotransformintoasocialite.Ihopeit’senoughtime.

Ispendtherestofthedaydoingprofilesonalltheplayersandstaff.IknowwhotheyaresinceI’m

a fan, but this is the more in-depth stuff. I’m looking for a reason that one of them would want to
sabotagetheteam.NothingjumpsoutatmerightawayandIplanontakingeverythinghomewithme
tocontinueworking.

Stella has other plans. She brings our friend Darcy to my office, and the two of them insist on

takingmeshopping.Ihesitatealittle,butIknowit’snecessary.Besides,Idowanttogo.Ijustcan’t
giveupmytomboyimage,eveninfrontofmyfriends.IletthemtakemetothemallandIendup
with some very fancy and very sexy dresses. I insisted on some jeans and casual clothes because I
can’talwaysbedressedup;especiallyifIattendpre-seasongames.Theygavein,butonlyhalf-way.
Nowevenmycasualclothesaredesignerbrands.

I fall asleep thinking about which dress I’ll wear. I can’t remember ever doing that before in my

life.Ofcourse,I‘venevergonetoapartywithZackTaylorbefore.Iknowhe’swayoutofmyleague
andI’vegottodateKevinDonaldson,butthatdoesn’tstopmefromdreamingofthemanwithdark
hairandeyes.

CHAPTER2

Zack

OnethingIloveaboutthesepartiesisthewomen.Actually,it’snotjustonething,it’stheonlything.

Imean,yeah,IcangetprettymuchanygirlIwantataclub,too,buttheyaren’talwaysdiscreet.The
womenwhoareinvitedtothesepartiesknowthatwearen’tcomingbackformoreiftheytalk.Not
thatIusuallytakeanywomantobedmorethanonce.Ihavenoqualmsaboutlettingonesuckmeoff
morethanonce,though.

Case in point is the woman on her knees in front of me right now. I spent a couple hours at her

placeafewmonthsagoandthenshewantedarepeatperformance.Itoldherno,andshestilloffered
totakecareofmeateveryparty.I’mnottheonlyoneshetakescareof,but,well,youknowwhatthey
say…practicemakesperfect.WhoamItoturndownasuperbblowjob?

We’re in the bathroom at my team owner ’s house. I know it’s probably totally inappropriate, but

I’mreallynottheonlyonewhodoesit.Ishouldmaybeknowbetterasoneoftheoldest,butagood
orgasm is definitely what the doctor ordered after the past few weeks. Weird things have been
happening, and I’m not so sure they’re all coincidences. I was hoping for a smooth ride with this
team. At almost thirty, I don’t have a lot of playing years left and I was looking to get a four year
contractsomewhere.Then,maybelookintoretiring.

Myparents’househasbeenpaidoffforyears,andmysisterisdoingwellonherown.Withmy

savingsfrommypayandallofmyendorsementdeals,I’mset.IfIdidn’tlovethegamesomuch,I’d
probably just say fuck it and get out now. But I do love it. And not just for the perks my body’s
enjoying right now. I truly love to play football. Running down the field to catch the ball for a
touchdownisbetterthananythingelseinthisworld.Anything.

My thoughts are interrupted as I feel my orgasm building down my spine. I notice I’m thrusting

intothischick’smouthasIholdherheadtightagainstme.She’stakingitallinliketheprosheis.As
I’mabouttocome,Ipushheroffmeandturntoletlooseinthesink.

“Iwouldhaveswallowedthatdown.”
“Noneed.Thanks.”
Shestandsandpullshershortdressdown.“Wecouldcontinuethis.”
Isighandlookather.“I’vebeenveryclearthatwewon’tbedoinganythingotherthanwhatyou

justdid,again.Youneedtostopaskingbecauseit’sgettingold.Ifyouwantmorethantogetonyour
knees,youshouldstopgettingdownonthemforallofus.I’msorryifthat’sharsh,butit’strue.”

“You’llchangeyourmind.”SherunsafakenailalongmysleeveandIpullback,glaringather.
“IpromiseyouIwon’t.”
“Jerk.”
ShestormsfromthebathroomasIwashup.Iamajerk,andmore.Iknowit.Iwasn’talwaysthis

way.WhenIstartedplayingballinhighschool,Iwasstillnaïveenoughtothinkthatgirlslikedme
forme.Bycollege,Iunderstoodthatitwasjustthestatusofbeingseenwiththestarrunningback.
WhenIwentpro,IknewthegameandI’vebeenplayingiteversince.Ihaven’tmetagirlwhowants
mejustforme,andI’vegivenuponfindingone.

Imakemyselfpresentableagainandgetreadytogobacktotheparty.AsIreachforthedoor,it

opens.Imovebacktonotbehitbyitassomechickpushesin.Shestopsinhertrackswhenshesees
meandturnsred.

“Oh.I’msorry.IjustsawawomanleavesoIthoughtitwasempty.”
She’s not what I’d consider my type at all, but I can’t stop staring at her. She’s about five three

withoutheels,Ithink.Shehasblondehairtwistedintosomecomplicatedstyleandeyessolightblue,
they’realmostgray.Shealsohasacutelittlemouthandsculptedcheeksthatwouldmakeanymodel
envious.Herblackdresshasanofftheshoulderneckline,andgoestoherknees,withsomenetting
thingthatgoesevenlower.She’sdefinitelygotcurves,butshe’snotadvertisingherwares.Ithinkshe
may be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, and it takes me a moment to catch my breath and
speak.

“Shewasdonebeinguseful.Icanbereadytogoagainintwentyminutesmax,soyou’rewelcome

toclosethedoorandwaitaround.”

“I—wait,what?YouthinkI’mhereto-tohavesexwithyou?”
“Wecoulddothatoryoucouldjustgetonyourknees.”
Shelooksshockedandthenit’squicklyreplacedbyanger.SheslapsmehardbeforeIevenseeit

coming.“You’redisgusting.”

I laugh as she turns and storms away on her tall heels, slamming the door behind her. I can’t

rememberthelasttimeawomanturnedmedown,muchlesshitme.Itwasactuallyprettyhot,even
thoughI’msureshedidn’tintendforittobe.Ineedtofindoutmoreabouther.That’snotgoingto
happenwhileI’minhere,soIheadbacktothepartydeterminedtofindherandgethertogoona
datewithme.

Yes,adate.It’sbeenyearssinceI’vebeenononethatisn’tforpublicity.Havingasupermodelon

myarmhasdonewondersformyendorsementdeals,butitwasallfake.Iwanttotakethisgirlout,
though.Notsomeplaceflashyorexpensive.IwanthertoseetherealmeandgototheplacesIusually
gotoalone.Idon’tunderstandwhyI’mfeelingthisway.

Iwalkoutintothebigroomwheremostofthepartyisgatheredandimmediatelyseeher.Fuckme.

Or not. She’s talking to Mr. Squeaky Clean, aka Kevin Donaldson, the team quarterback. I guess it
makes sense since she’s dressed conservatively for this crowd and slapped me. But I don’t like it. I
want to storm over there and claim her for my own. I don’t know what’s going on. I haven’t been
jealousoverawomaninyears.Imean,Ihaven’teventalkedtoher.AllIknowisIwantherandifthat
meanspissingoffmyquarterbacktogether,sobeit.

I walk over and stand behind her. Kevin gives me a curious look, but I don’t give two fucks.

“Who’syourfriend,Donaldson?”

Sheturnsatthesoundofmyvoiceandglaresatme.Kevinlookslikehedoesn’twanttoanswer,but

he’stooniceaguynotto.“ThisisAinsley.HermomisfriendswithLindsey.Ainsley,thisisoneof
theguyswhosupportsmeonthefield.HisnameisZack.”

I hold out my hand and although she hesitates, Ainsley takes it. She has small hands, but a firm

handshake.Iholdonalittletoolongandshenarrowshereyesbeforepullingherhandaway.Ismirk
ather.Imaybemakinghernervous,butatleastit’ssomething.She’sfeelingsomethingforme.It’sa
start.

Kevincanseeit,andhe’snotlikingitatall.Hetriestosteertheconversationbacktohim.“Ican

explaintoyouwhathedoes.Iknowthiscanallbeabitconfusing.”

“He’sarunningback.Herushedforover800yardslastyearandwaspickeduponatradedealfor

theLegions.HewasaHeismanfinalistincollegeandisconsideredoneofthebestonthefield.”

Well,well,well.Veryinteresting.“So,you’reafan,huh,Ains?”
“MynameisAinsley,andIjusthappentolovefootball.”

“Areyousureit’snotjustme?”
Shelooksatmeandthenproceedstospoutofffactsabouttheentireteam.Shealsoanalyzesour

play from the special exhibition game we played and points out where we did great and where we
couldhavedonebetter.Theentireroomhasgonequietandeveryoneislisteningtoher.She’spretty
spot on with her observations. It is, without a doubt, the hottest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. If I
didn’talreadywanther,Isureashellwouldnow.

Jack Rivers walks over with his wife Lindsey. She looks a little freaked out. “You didn’t tell me

Ainsleywasafootballexpert,honey.”

“Ididn’trealizesheknewsomuch.”
It’sAinsley’sturntolookalittlefreakedout.“I-Ididn’trealizeitwassuchabigdeal.”
“Youjustanalyzedanentiregameinafewminutesandpointedout—accurately,Imightadd—what

eachplayerneedstodotohelpuswin.That’saverybigdeal.”

“Oh. I just noticed a few things.” She’s chewing her bottom lip and my pants are getting tighter

every second. Thank God I’m wearing a suit. This jacket is the only thing saving me from being
completelyembarrassedrightnow.Wait…didIjustsayIwasembarrassedbymyerection?Whatthe
fuckishappeningtome?

“Afewveryimportantthings.Lindseysaidyouneededajob,andI’dliketohireyou.”
“Really?”Nowshelooksexcited.Ishouldwalkawaybeforemycockbreaksthroughmypants,but

Ican’t.

“Yes.Icoulduseanextrasetofeyestolookattheteam.Itwouldbeaspecialposition,andyou’d

reportdirectlytome.Justgotopracticesandgamesandtellmewhatyouthink.Combinedwithwhat
thecoachesandIsee,wecanworkonwhatweneedtoimprove.”

“I’dlovetodothat.Thankyou.”
“Great. You can start on Monday. Be at the field at eight.” Jack nods at me and Kevin, and then

walksaway.IseeAinsleymouth“I’msorry”toLindsey,whojustshakesherhead.Interesting.

“Well,thisshouldbefun.Ican’twaittobeanalyzedbyyou.Wecanhaveaprivatesessionifyou

thinkIneedtheextrawork.”

“Areyoureallyalwaysthismuchofanassorisitjustformybenefit?”
“He’salwaysthisway.Leavemygirlalone,Zack.”
“Yourgirl?’
“Yeah,she’smine,”hesaysashewrapshisarmaroundher.I’mseeingredandwantnothingmore

thantopunchhiscleancutass.

SheuntanglesherselfbeforeIlosemyshit.“I’mnotyourgirl,Kevin.IjustsaidI’dgooutwithyou

tomorrow.Onedatedoesn’tmakemeyours.”

It would make her mine. I know it. I’ve already scared her enough today, though, so I keep my

mouthshutforonce.Kevindoesn’tdothesame,thedumbbastard.

“I’mthequarterback,Ainsley.AllthegirlswantmeandIdon’tgivemanythepleasureofmytime.

Unlikesomeotherpeople,I’mselectiveinwhoIchoosetospendmytimewith.You’reprettyandI
thinkwe’dhavefun.I’dalsobeveryrespectfulandnotexpectanythingfromyoutomorrow.”

“I appreciate the respect, Kevin, but if you’re implying that I’m lucky to be going out with you,

well,IthinkI’llhavetopass.Ithinkofmyselfhighenoughtoknowaguywouldbeequallyluckyto
dateme.Iwantsomeonewhoseesthatandunderstandsneitherofusismoreimportantthantheother.
Sorrytowasteyourtime.I’llseeyoubothonMondaymorning.”

AinsleywalksawayfromusasKevin’sjawdrops.IlaughandclaphimonthebackasIwalkaway,

too.Ispendtherestofthepartywatchinghertalktothecoachesandotherplayers,whileignoringthe
advancesoftheotherwomenattheparty.Nooneelsecomesevenclosetointerestingmeatthispoint.

I need to go out with her. I see my chance to talk to her again when she’s leaving the party. I
practicallyrunoutthedoorafterher.

“Ains!Waitup.”
“Itoldyoumyname’snot-.”
Ikissherbeforeshecancontinue.It’sasweetkiss.Forme,atleast.Untilshemoansandgrabsthe

backofmyhead.That’swhenIlickherlipsuntilsheopensthemandtakecontrolofhertongue.Her
handsareclutchingmybicepsandminearemessingupthatprettyhairdo.

ShekissesmebackandIlethertakecontrolforaminute.I’mnotatotalNeanderthal.That,andI

wanttoseewhatshe’lldo.Ialmostcomeonthespotasshetwistshertonguearoundmineandsucks
hard. I’m the one moaning now. That seems to startle her and she pulls away. I follow her with my
mouthandgetinacouplemoresmallkissesbeforeshestepsback.

“You-youcan’tjustgoaroundkissingpeople.”
“Idon’t.”
“Yeahright.”
SheturnstowalkawayandIcatchherarm.“Ifuckgirlsandletthemsuckmeoff,butIrarelykiss

a girl. Not unless it’s a deal breaker for the rest, and even then I usually just walk away and find
someoneelse.”

“You’resuchaprince.”
“No.I’mnot.I’manassholetomostwomen.Idon’tknowwhy,sincewe’vejustmetandhaven’t

evenreallytalked,butIwantmorewithyou.Iwantedtokissyou.Ihonestlycan’trememberwhenthe
lasttimethishappened.Ialsowanttotakeyouonadate.It’sbeenyearsforthat.”

“I’mnotjustgoingtogotoyourplaceandhavesex.”
“Iknow.”
“Whatkindofdate?”
“Whateveryouwant.”
“Anything?”
“Yes.”I’mprobablygoingtoregretit,butImeanwhatI’msaying.I’llgoanywherewithherand

doanythingshewants.

“Well,thenmyanswerisno.”
“Gre—what?”
“A leopard doesn’t so easily change his spots. You had some woman in the bathroom a couple

hoursagoandnowyouwanttotakemeonadate?”

“Yeah.Ido.”
“Thenproveittome.”
“How?”
“You’reasmartguy.You’llfigureitout.Andmaybeifyoudo,I’llsayyesnexttime.”
ShewalksawayandIswearthere’sanextraswingtoherhipsthatwasn’tthereearlier.Ichuckleto

myself.ImayhavejustmetmymatchandI’mnotsureI’muptothechallenge.Iwanttobe,though,
soI’llfigurethisoutanddowhatIhavetoinordertogetthatdate.

CHAPTER3

Ainsley

Lindseywasobviouslynothappyaboutmyfootballshowattheparty,butJanecalmedherdown.

Thingsactuallydidworkoutbetterthisway.NowIhaveaccesstoeverythingatthestadium,notjust
thepartiesandsocialevents.It’sMondaymorningandIcan’twaittolookaround.

WhoamIkidding?WhileIwanttogetmyjobdone,bothofmyjobsactually,Ireallywanttosee

Zack.Thatkisswasjust…wellitwasn’tboring,that’sforsure.ItfeltlikehesetmeonfireandI’ve
beendreamingofhimallweekend.Whilesleepingandwhileawake.Myfriendsteasedmeaboutitat
brunchonSunday,butIdon’tcare.IhopehegotthemessageandwillstopwiththeotherwomensoI
cangoonadatewithhim.I’mnotholdingmybreath,though.I’mnothing¸ifnotarealist.

Todayisanopenpracticesotheparkinglotatthestadiumisprettyfull.Ipullaroundtotheplayer

and staff entrance where I show my ID and am let through. I park and then enter the back of the
stadiumafterreceivingatemporarybadgefromtheguardatthedoor.Ineedtostopintotheoffices
afterpracticetofilloutpaperworkandgetmyrealbadge.

AsIwalkoutontothefield,Ilookaround.Iseeabunchofwomenwithsignsproclaimingtheir

love for Zack, Kevin, and a few other players. But it’s not just women crowding the stadium, guys
wearingteamt-shirtsandjerseysaresittinganxiouslytosupporttheteam.Iseeacoupleguyswho
lookoutofplace,though.I’llhavetotryandkeepaneyeonthemwhilewatchingthegame.Idecide
thebestwaytodothatiswatchfrombehindtheendzone.ItellthecoachesIwantadifferentangle
fromthemandthenputonmysunglassesastheplayerstakethefield.

Thepracticegoesprettywell.Iseeafewthingsfortheguystoworkon,butI’msurethecoaches

see them too. I alternate my attention from the players to the stands. And Zack. He’s never off my
radar;although,Idomybesttoblockhimoutwhiletryingtopayattentiontoeverythingelse.The
guysinthestandsdon’tdoanythingoutoftheordinary,soIrulethemoutfornow.

It’sagoodthingIhavemysunglassesonwhenZacktakesoffhishelmetandjersey.Holyhotbody.

Amanthatgoodlookingshouldbeillegal.It’stherealshowtimenow.Atleast,whereheandIare
concerned.Iwatchhimwalktothestandswithsomeoftheotherplayersandhopethathe’llholdback
withthewomen.

I should’ve known better. I do know better. He’s immediately in “Zack” mode. Signing breasts,

lettingthewomenkisshischeekwhileheputshisarmaroundthemandstillcuppingabreastwithhis
otherhand.Iknowhehastobefriendly,butmostoftheotherguysaren’tgoingasfarasheis.He
obviously enjoys both the attention and the groping that comes with it. I knew that. I did. I was just
stupidenoughtobelieveI’dbedifferent.Ishakemyheadandwalktothetunnel.Istillneedtotalkto
Jackandfilloutmypaperwork.

“What’stherush?”
Ididn’thearZackcomeintothetunnelafterme.Idon’tturnaroundasIanswerhim.“Ihavetotalk

toJackanddomyemploymentpaperwork.”

“DoIgetahintabouthowIdidtoday?”He’stryingtoflirtwithmenow?Thisguy’sdefinitelya

pieceofwork.

“Didn’tthewomeninthestandstellyoualready,orweretheymoreinterestedintheresultsofthe

breastexamsyougavethem?”Dammit.Ididn’twanttosaythat,especiallynotinthehurttoneIknow
itcameoutin.

“Ainsley.”Hereachesouttograbmyarmandstopme.Idon’tturn,sohemovesaroundmeand

liftsmyfaceandcaressingmycheek.“Ihavetobefriendlytothosewomen.They’refans.Don’tbe
jealous.”

“Youdidn’thavetobethatfriendly.AndI’mnotjealous.I’mdisappointed.”Ipullawayandstart

walkingagain.“You’vegotlipstickalloveryourface,bytheway.Youmightwanttowashthatoff.”

Ihearacrashandturntoseehishelmetonthegroundbythewall.He’sstandingthereinthemiddle

of the tunnel with his jersey still off and his muscles glistening with sweat. His jaw is locked as he
looksatmewitheyesblazing.“Thisisn’tover.”

“Itneverevenbegan,”ItellhimasIturnandpracticallyrundownthehall.
IfindJack’sofficeandgooverwhatInoticedwithhim.Hedoesalotofnoddingandtellsmehe

sawmostofit,butIalsogavehimacoupleofnewinsights.HewalksmeovertoHumanResources
askingafewmorequestionsaboutmyself.

“Didyougotocollege?”
“Yes.IwenttoschoolinChicago.”
“Whatwasyourmajor?”
“Computerprogramming.”
“Really? I would have expected sports medicine or something that would lead you to coaching.

You’reanaturalatfootball,atleast.”

“Ilovefootballandothersports,butcomputersaremytruelove.”
“Nowthat’sashame.Youneedtofindaniceguytobeyourtruelove,mydear.”
“There’snoonewho’sinterestedmeenoughtoreplacemycomputers,I’mafraid.”
“EvenZack?”
“Zack?”
“Isawthewayhewaslookingatyouduringthepartyandthewayyoulookedathim.Thetwoof

youcouldn’tkeepyoureyesoffeachother.He’sagreatman,despitetheimageheprojects.Ithinkthe
twoofyouwouldmakeagreatcouple.”

“Idon’tthinkZackTaylor ’sinterestedinbeingpartofanycouple,Jack.Besides,isn’ttherearule

aboutstaffandplayersdating?”

“Thereisaruleforregularstaff.But,you’reworkingformedirectly,soIcanmakeorbreakany

rulesIwant.LikeIsaid,Zack’smorethanhisimage.Ifheasksyouout,Ithinkyoushouldconsider
it.”

“I’llconsiderit,”Itellhimhonestly.
ConsideringitissomethingIcando.Actuallygoingoutwithhim,isnot.NotafterwhatI’veseen

sofar.I’mnotveryexperienced,butevenIknowit’snotagoodideatogetwithaguywhocan’tkeep
itinhispants.Orsaynotoafanaskingtokissandgropehim.

IputallthoughtsofZackawayinthebackofmymindasIfilloutmypaperwork.Ipayattentionto

thedesktopcomputersthey’reusingintheofficesandmanagetoslideasmalllisteningdeviceunder
thedesk.It’ssosmallthatnoonewouldnoticeit.JamesBondhasnothingonus.WhoneedsQwhen
you’vegotScottGriffinandme?

AfterIdothepaperwork,Iheadtothelockerroomtotalkwiththecoaches.Ihearacommotion

and run down the hall. When I peek in the door, I see Kevin on the ground, twitching. The team
doctorsaresurroundinghimalready,soItakethetimetoseewhathappened.Hislockerisopenand
everyoneismovedawayfromitassparksarestillcomingoffit.Icarefullysteparoundthepoolof
wateronthefloorandtrytotakeacloserlook.

TryistheoperativewordasI’mphysicallymovedback.IfightagainstZack,becauseIknowit’s

him,buthe’ssomuchstrongerandbiggerthanme.Whenhesetsmedown,Ispinaroundtofacehim.
“Don’teverdothatagain.I’mnotsometoyyoucanjustcartaround.”

“Ijustsavedyouandyou’reyellingatme?Un-fucking-believable.Ijustcan’twinwithyou.”
“Ididn’tneedsaving.I’mnotanidiot.Iamacomputernerd,whichmeansIknowsomethingabout

electricity,too.Iwantedtolookatthat.”Isighbeforecontinuing.“Butthankyouforyourconcern.I
appreciateit.”

Iwalkawayfromhimbeforehecanrespondandstartlookingatthelockerandwiring.Imakesure

not to touch anything. Not because I’m afraid of getting shocked. I could disable it easily, but the
police will need to see it. It’s a fairly simple rig with some stripped wires connected to a small car
batteryplacedinthebottomofthelocker.ItakesomepicswithmypursecameratosendtoReina.

Thepoolofwaterlooksundisturbed,whichisodd.WhenIlookoveratKevin,Icanseethatthere’s

nowaterdrippingoffhisfeet.That’salsostrange.Ican’timaginehe’dmissthepuddle.Couldhehave
donethistohimself?Icheckedhimout,though,andfoundnoreasonforhimtowanttheteamtofail.
Hehasagoodcontractandisstartingquarterback.I’mgoingtokeepaclosereyeonhim.MaybeI
shouldn’thavebackedoutofourdate.I’llfiguresomethingout.

I know Zack was watching me as I looked over everything. I could feel his eyes on me. I hope I

didn’tgivetoomuchawaytohimoranyoneelse.Ihadtolookatthelocker,though.Especiallysince
there’s no way Kevin’s working alone if he is in on this. He was on the field and I think someone
wouldhavenoticedsomethingiftherewasthispuddleandriggingbeforepractice.Ineedtogoover
thefilesagain.IthinkI’llaskTegantolookoverthem,too.She’sourresearchanddocumentsexpert.
I’mhopingshe’llseesomethingImissed.Untilthen,I’llhavetokeepaclosewatchoneveryone.

Iwaitwitheveryoneuntiltheambulancecomesandthenheadouttomycar.“Waitup,Ains.”
“Willyoupleasestopcallingmethat?”Idon’treallymeanit.Ilikethathe’snicknamedme.Ilikeit

alot.That’stheproblem.

“Ifitreallybothersyouthatmuch,Iwill.”IlookupintohiseyesandIseethathemeansit.
“No.It’sfine.I’mjustbeingbitchy.”
Hesmilesatme.Afullonsmilethatlightsuphiseyesandmakesmewanttobeghimtohavemy

children.I’veneverseenthissmilefromhim,sohemustsaveitforwhenhewantstoundosomeone.
Probablywomen.ThatsnapsmeoutofthefogIwasin.

“Youshouldharnessthatsmile.I’mnotdroppingtomykneesforyou.”
“Iwasn’tgoingtoaskyouto.AndIdidn’trealizeIwassmilinganydifferently.IfIdid,it’sbecause

ofyou.Youmakemewanttosmile,evenwhenyou’rebeing‘bitchy.’”

“Doesthatlineworkforyou,Zack?”
Hefrownsandstepsback.“Thatwasn’taline.Iwasbeingsincere,butIguessit’sjustalostcause

withyou,huh?Youjustwanttothinkofmeassomeidiotman-whoreandnottrytogettoknowthe
realme.Justlikeeveryoneelse.”

God,Iambeingabitch.“I’msorry,Zack.I’mjustnotusedtoanyonepayingattentiontome.AndI

neversaidyouwereanidiot.ButfromwhatI’vewitnessed,yes,Iwouldsayyou’reaman-whore.I’ll
beonthelookoutforthe‘real’youwhenyoudecidetolethimshow.IcanonlygobywhatIseeand
hear,youknow.”

Herunsahandthroughhisstilldamphair.“Idoknow.IthoughtIwasdoingokaytoday.Ididn’t

eventhinkwhenIwaswiththosewomen.I’msousedtobehavingthatway.Ijustdoitonautopilot.I
can’t change overnight, but I’ll try to do better and think before I act. I’m not gonna lie. It’s been a
longtimesinceI’vethoughtaboutsomeoneelsewhenIact.Iknowyou’llcallmeoutifImessup,
though.”

“Iwill,”Itellhim.Iwanthimtowinmeover,butIwon’tsettleforlessthanIdeserve.Thenext

wordsIsayareoutbeforeIhaveachancetothink.“Doyouwanttogetlunch?”

Hiseyesnearlypopoutofhishead.“Really?”
“Justlunch.Asfriends.”
“Icandofriendsfornow.Andyes,I’dlovetogotolunchwithyou.”
“Great.”Ialmostsuggestsomething,butthenrememberthatI’mnotsupposedtobefromhere.“Is

theresomeplaceyouliketogohereintown?”

“Umm,yeah.IhaveafewplacesIreallylike.They’renotfancy,though.”
“I’mnotfancy,Zack.”
He looks at my clothes skeptically. Shit! I forgot I was in designer jeans, a cute top and way too

expensiveflats.Idecidetogivehimalittlenuggetoftruthsincehe’sbeensoopenwithmetoday.

“MyfriendputtogetherawardrobeformebeforeIgothere.NormallyI’dbeinabaggyt-shirt,

oldjeans,andChuckswithmyhairinamessybunandmyglasseson.ShethoughtIneededtolook
moreglamorousifIwashangingwiththeteamandtheRiversfamily.”

ThatbigsmileisbackandI’mmeltinginmorethanoneplacenow.“I’dlovetoseeyouinoneof

myt-shirtsalongwithyourChucksandglasses.Thejeanswouldbeoptional.”

Irollmyeyesandswathimonthearm.“Justtellmewheretogo,Casanova.”
Beforehecananswer,someonecallshisname.Webothturnasamanrunsuptous.“I’mgladI

caughtyou.Iwantedtotalkwithyou.”

“I’mbusy,Dex.”
“Icameallthisway,andyou’regoingoffwithsomechickwhogotherselfonthesidelines?”
“You didn’t tell me you were coming, and my friend Ainsley works for the team. But yes, I’m

goingtolunchwithher.Nexttime,tellmeyou’recoming.”

ZackturnsbacktomeandsaysthenameofalocaldinerchainIlike.ItellhimI’llfinditandthen

pulloutbeforehecansayanotherword.Ineedtogetawayfromhimforafewminutes.Beinginhis
orbitandhavingallhisattentiononmeismorethanalittleunnerving.Iwashonestlyalittlehappyto
seethatguy,whoInowrecognizeashisagent,becauseitgavemeachancetocooldown.

CHAPTER4

Zack

Ainsleyisonecoolchick.Iwasalreadyattractedtoher,butI’vecometoreallylikeherasaperson.

We’ve had lunch together every day after practice these past two weeks. We’ve talked about our
familiesandfriendsandeverythingelsewecouldthinkof.She’salsohelpedmewithmyplay,which
hasbeengreatsinceitlookslikeKevinwillbeoutforatleastanotherweek.Ihadtostepupmygame
in order to help make up for our starting quarterback not being able to play. Everyone’s rallying,
though, so I think we’ll be fine this weekend. We’re having lunch near the airport today since our
flightforthisweekend’spre-seasonawaygameleavesinafewhours.

“So,Ains,you’vetoldmeallaboutyourfamilyandfriends.Iwanttoknowaboutyoutoday.Tell

meallyoursecrets.”

“I’mnotgoingtotellyouallmysecrets,butyoumaybeabletopryoneortwooutofme,”she

tellsmewithasmile.

Irubmyhandstogetherandgiveheradevilishsmileback.“Let’sstartwithyourfirstboyfriend.

Whowastheboythatwonyourheart?”

Sheloseshersmileandlooksdownatherplate.“Askmesomethingelse,please.”
Ireachoutandtiltherchinbackuptolookatme.“DoIneedtofindsomebastardandkickhisass

forhurtingmygoodfriendallthoseyearsago?”

I’mtryingtolightenhermood,butitdoesn’twork.Shejustcloseshereyesandshakesherhead.A

tearleaksout ofoneeye, makingmejump upfrommy sideof theboothto joinheron herside.I
scootherinsoIcansitnexttoher.

“Ididn’tmeantoupsetyou.I’msosorry.Ididn’trealizeyouhadsuchabadexperience.”
Shelaughsabitterlaugh.“I’vehadnoexperience.”
“Huh?”
“I’ve never had a first boyfriend. Or any boyfriend. Guys have never really thought of me in a

romanticway.”Shetriestopushmeoutoftheboothsoshecanescape,butIpullhertomeandhold
hertight,rubbingherback.

“Mygenderisdefinitelystupidattimes.Iwould’vebeenalloveryouasateen.”
Shepullsbackalittletolookatme.“Youwould’vewantedtodatethegirlwhocouldbeatyouat

almostanysportanddidn’tknowhowtoputonmake-upordoherhair?Orthecollegestudentwho
wasahugecomputernerd?”

“Yeah.I’mprettysureIwouldhave.Becauseyou’dhaveseenme.Notthefootballstar,butme.At

leastIthinkyouwould’ve.”

“Iseeyounow,”shetellsme.“Atfirst,yeah,Isawthefootballgod.But,everyday,Iseeanewpart

ofyou.You’repeelingbackyourlayersforme.”

“Iam.It’sthescariestfuckingthingI’veeverdoneinmylife,butI’mdoingit.”
“Thankyou.”
“No,thankyou.Formakingmebrave.”Itakeadeepbreathanddecidetojustlayitalloutforher.

“You said you’ve never had a boyfriend. Well, I’ve never had a real girlfriend. I’ve had girls who

wanttobeseenandfuckedbyZackTaylor,butneveranyonewhojustwantedZack,theguy.I’mjusta
commoditytomostpeopleandsoonedayIdecidedtobecomethehappygolucky,fuckanythingthat
moveskindofguywhodidn’tcarewhatanyonethought.”

“But you do care what everyone thinks. At least when you’re playing. I see it. You absorb

everythingweallsaytoyouanddoyourbesttochangeorfixwhateveryouneedto.”

“Youseethat?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t want to be that guy anymore. The one who sleeps around and pretends not to care. I’m

tryingnottobe.Ihaven’ttouchedawomansincewemet,Ains.It’sonlyyouforme.Iwanttobeyour
equal.”

Shelooksshocked.Sinceweonlyseeeachotherduringtheday,I’mguessingshethoughtIwasup

tomyoldwaysatnight.Ididn’tcallheroranythingbecauseIwastryingnottopush.IthoughtI’d
beenshowinghowintoherIam.IguessI’mnotdoingitright.

“I-Ididn’tknow.Imeanwe’refriends,butweonlyseeeachotherforlunch.”
“Iwastryingnottopush.IguessIshould’vecalledyouatnightorsomething.”
“Iwould’velikedthat,butIappreciateyoushowingmerespectbytryingnottopushandnotbeing

withotherwomen.I’veseenyoubenotsofriendlywiththefans,too.Areyoudoingokay?Imean…
with…youknow…nothaving…umm…sex?”

Ican’thelpbutlaughalittle.“Myhand’sgettingagoodworkout,butI’mokay.AndlikeIsaid,I’m

tryingtodoabetterjobofbeingaguyyouwanttobewith.CanIcallyoutonight?”

“Yes,please.”AndthenshedoessomethingI’mnotexpecting.Shewrapsherarmsaroundmyneck

andpullsmetoher.Shebrushesherlipsacrossmineandhugsmeclose.“You’realreadytheguyI
want,Zack.”

I want to kiss her again, but my phone alarm goes off telling me it’s time for us to drive to the

airport.Ipaythecheckandwegetinourseparatecars.Webothparkinlongtermparkingandhead
totheprivateterminalforourflight.We’rethelastonestoarriveandconversationstopsaseveryone
seesuswalkuptogether,especiallybecauseI’mcarryingherbag.Idon’tknowwhy,buthavingthem
knowwe’rekindoftogetherfreaksmeout.Alot.Iwantustobeprivate.JustherandI,nooneelseto
interfere.

Ipurposelydropherbagandwalkaheadofhertoeveryone.“LookwhoIfoundintheparkinglot.

Shecouldn’tcarryherbag,whichmeanssheoverpacked.”

It’salie.Herbagweighspracticallynothing.Idon’tturntolookatherbecauseIknowwhatI’ll

see.I’vejustlostalltheprogressImadeinonefellswoop.Ifeelguilty,butatthesametimerelieved.
I’llexplainittoherlater.

“Thanks. What would I possibly have done without the great Zack Taylor to save me from my

carryon?”

Isuckinabreathatherwords.Shehastoknowwhathertalkingaboutmelikethatwoulddotome.

Itoldheraboutmyfearsandshejustthrewtheminmyface.Fuckbeingagoodguy.I’mgettinglaid
tonight.

WegetontheplaneandIsitinbackwiththeguyswhileAinsleysitswithLindseyRivers,alittlebit

away from everyone else. They have their heads together and seem to be talking about something
serious.Theyglanceatthestaffeveryonceinawhile,butneverbackatme.Idon’thavetimetodwell
onthem,though.

With Donaldson out of this game and maybe the next one, it’s up to me to rally the troops. The

backupquarterbackhasdonereallywellinpracticeandI’vejustgottohopehecarriesitoverinto
thisgame.Idecidetoinvitehimoutwithmetonight.Weprobablybothneedtogetlaid.

Wehavetosplitintoseparateelevatorswhenwegettothehotelandthankfully,Ainsley’snoton

mine.MystomachdropswhenIgetofftheelevatorandseeshe’snotonlyonmyfloor,butshe’snext
doortome.Herwordsfromearlierarestillringinginmyears,soIchoosetobeabastard.“Ihope
youbroughtearplugs.I’mplanningonmakingsomeonescreamtonight.”

“Leopard.Spots,”shetellsmewithaglareassheopensherdoor.
“Bitch.”
“Man-whore.”
Shewalksinsideandslamsthedoorbehindher.Ohyeah,it’son.I’mgoingtobringsomeoneback

herenomatterwhat.Itrustedherandshefuckedmeover.Now,shegetstohearwhatshehelpedbring
backtolife.

***

Ainsley

I can’t believe I kissed him. I kissed that lying bastard and now he’s out looking for someone to

bringbacktohisroomandfuck.Unluckyinlovedoesn’tevencomeclosetodescribingme.Atleast
nowIcanfocusontheinvestigationandnotbedistractedbyoversixfeetofpurehotmale.

A few hours later, I have all my evidence spread out over my bed and I’ve actually got a couple

peopleIthinkIshouldtakeasecondlookat.I’monthephonewithTegan,goingoverwhatshefound
whenmystomachgrowls.“Wasthatyourstomach,Ainsley?”

“Umm,yeah.”
“Goeat.Wecantalksomemoretomorrow.Ithinkyou’reontherighttrackwithDonaldsonanda

staffmember.”

“Thanks,Tegan.”
Ihangupandcallroomservice.IputeverythingawayandwatchsomerealityTVwhileIwait.A

littlewhilelater,IhearloudlaughterandthenthedoorinZack’sroomslamsshut.Timeforthereal
show,Iguess.There’saknockatthedoorandmyhungerovercomescommonsense—andallofmy
training—asIjustblindlyopenthedoor.

I’m immediately slammed backwards into my room. A hand’s clamped over my mouth, but I

managetofliptheassailantovermeandthenIscream.He—Iknowit’sahefromwhenIwaspressed
against him—lunges for me again as the connecting door between my room and Zack’s splinters
open.TheguyseesZackbarrelingthroughandrunsoutthedoor.

I chase after him and have just reached the stairwell door when I’m pulled back. “Do you have a

fuckingdeathwish?”

Ican’tbreakmycover,soIturntoZackandnoticehe’sonlyinhisunderwear.“Sorrytointerrupt

yourdate.I’msureyoucanstillmakeherscream.”

Heletsoutastringofcursesandfollowsmedownthehall.Iwalkintomyroomandcallsecurity

who tells me they’ll call the police. I’m not trying to eavesdrop, but there is a hole where the door
was,soIcanhearZacktryingtoplacatethewomanhebroughttohisroom.

“Wecanstillhavefun,Zack.”
“I’mjustnotintoittonight.Sorry.Icanhaveacabcalledforyou.”
“That’sokay.I’dlikeyoutocallmetomorrownight,though.”
“Maybe.”
“I’llbewaiting.”
Ihearhisdoorcloseandthenhewalksintomyroom.Heputonjeans,buthe’sstillshirtless.“Are

youokay,Ains?”

“I’mfine.Youdidn’tneedtosendheraway.I’msurethey’llgetmeanewroomoryoucouldhave

justclosedthedooronyourside.Youwantedmetohearthetwoofyou,andnowyou’vemissedyour
chance.”Ican’tkeepthehurtoutofmyvoice.

Zacksighsandthensitsonmybed,runninghishandsthroughhishair.“ItoldyouthingsI’veonly

evertoldmysister,andyouthrewitinmyfaceattheairport.ThathurtmeandIwantedtohurtyou
back.”

Iknowhe’sright,butI’mnotinterestedinbeingthebiggerpersonrightnowsoIlashoutaswell.

“OnlyafteryoutreatedmelikeIwasnothingtoyou.”

“Ijustdidn’twanteveryonetoknowaboutus.Idon’tevenknowwhatus is and I didn’t want the

guystalkingaboutyouuntilwefiguredoutwhatwewantedtobe.”

“Icouldhandletheguystalkingaboutme.Iwouldn’tcare.”
“ButyouknowIwould.”
“Youcould’vejustsaidwemetintheparkinglot.Youdidn’tneedtoinsultme.”
“Ipanicked.”
“AndIreactedbadlybecauseyouhurtme.I’msorryforthat.”
“I’msorry,too.Canwegobacktowherewewereatthediner?”
Iwanttotellhimyes,butIcan’t.“No.Imayhavebeenmean,butIdidn’tbringaguytomyroom

andtrytothrowitinyourface.Youwenttoofar.”

“Ididn’twanther.Atall.Iwastryingtomakeyoujealousandhurtyou.”
“Well,yousucceeded.Andwhydidyourclothesendupoffifyouweren’tgoingtohavesexwith

her?”

Hehangshishead.“ItookmyclothesoffandthentoldhertotakehersoffwhileIopenedmyside

oftheconnectingdoors.Iwasplanningtotrytogetyoutoopenyoursideandseeus,butthenyou
screamed.”

“Di-didyoutouchher.Nevermind.That’sastupidquestion.Ofcourseyoutouchedher.”
“No,Ididn’t.Shetouchedmyarminthebar,butthenItoldheritwouldbesexierifwedidn’ttouch

eachotheruntilwewereinbed.ShewaswillingtogoalongwithwhateverIwanted.Theyallare.”I
hearthebitternessandalsosomehurtinhisvoice.

“Exceptforme.”
Helaughsbeforeresponding.“Yeah.YoualmostneverdowhatIwant.”
“Maybethat’swhyyoulikeme.IfIstartdoingwhatyouwant,you’llgetboredandmoveon.”
“Iwasn’tboredwhenyoukissedandhuggedmeatthediner.AndIwantedthosethingsverymuch.”
“That?Iwasn’tevenbeingsexy.”
“Newsflash,Ains.You’realwayssexytome.Always.”Hewalksoverandkissesmesweetly.
“Fine.You’vewornmedown.Again.I’llgooutwithyoutomorrowifyouwant.”
“Oh,Iwant.ButIcan’t.Ihaveplanstomorrow.”
“Allday?”
“Afterpractice,yeah.”
Well,isn’tthatjustlovely.Igivehimanotherchanceandhe’sgotadatealready.“Well,enjoyyour

date.”

“It’snotadate.”
“That’sevenbetter.”
“Seriously, it’s not a date. And I’m not hooking up with some chick. I know I’ve given you no

reasontotrustme,butI’maskingyouto.IcouldtellyouwhereI’mgoing,butitwouldmeanalotto
meifyoucouldjustbelievethatIdon’twantanyonebutyou.Canyoudothat?Please?”

Ilookintohiseyesandseethathe’ssincere.Andthatheneedsthis.Heneedsmetotrusthim.Iput

asidemyfearsandnod.“Okay.Tomorrow’sout,butit’snotbecauseofanotherwoman.Iamtrusting

you,Zack.Pleasedon’tletmedown.”

Beforehecansayanythingelse,there’saknockatthedoor.Iopenittofindsecurityandthepolice.

I spend the next couple of hours going over what happened with them and then letting them try to
collectevidence.Theguywaswearingglovesandthisis a hotel room, so they don’t find anything
theycanuse.ItellthehotelthatI’mfinestayinginthisroom.Idon’tthinkhe’llbeback.

Zacktriestotalktomesomemore,butItellhimIneedtorestandaskhimtoclosethedooronhis

side.Icantellhedoesn’twantto,buthedoeswhatIask.Iclimbintobedwithamillionquestionson
mymind.ItextReinaandtellherIcan’treallytalkwiththethindoorbeingtheonlythingbetweenme
andZack.ShetellsmetocalltomorrowwhenI’malone.IfallintoadeepsleepanddreamofZack
andhowgoodhelookedinhisboxerbriefs.

CHAPTER5

Zack

I’mtryingnottoscrewupanymorewithAinsley.Thecopsinterrupteduslastnight,butIbrought

herbreakfastbeforepracticethismorning.Wekissed,butthat’sasfarasitwent.Ididn’twanttostop,
butwewouldn’thavemadeittopractice—orthegametomorrow—ifwe’dgoneanyfurther

Icantellthatmebeingsecretiveisbotheringher,butshe’sdoingherbesttohideitandactnormal.

Icouldchangemyplansfortoday,butIhonestlydon’twantto.Ishouldn’thaveto.Ainsley’snoteven
mygirlfriendandI’malreadytwistedupabouther.NowonderI’veneverdonerelationshipsbefore.I
knowshe’sworthit,though.IwanttobewithhermorethanIwanttowintomorrow,whichispretty
telling.

Practice ends and I shower before finding a quiet corner to kiss my girl in. I break away sooner

than I’d like and head out to meet Sierra. We have a great day, although she makes me go to some
museums with her. That’s not really my thing, but I’d do anything for her. I actually enjoy seeing
someofthepaintingsandsculptures.IendupbuyingsomethingforAinsleyinoneofthegiftshops.
It just reminded me of her and I know she’s going to love it. Of course that led to some questions
fromSierra,butIdidn’treallycare.

We walk in the door of a restaurant she said she’s been wanting to try and are met with a full

waiting area. I muscle us through the throng and give my name to the hostess. I probably could’ve
gottenusatablefaster,butItrynottodothat.Today,especially,Ijustwanttobeme.

“Thanksagainforspendingthewholedaywithme,Zack.Iknowhowbusyyouarewiththegame

tomorrow.”

“I’ddoanythingforyou.Youknowthat.You’llbetheretomorrow,right?”
“Ofcourse.I’dnevermissthechancetoseemyfavoriteplayerinalivegame.”
“Thanks.Itmeansalot.There’snooneelseI’dratherhavethere.”Ileanoverandkissheronthe

cheekandthenhughertight.IlookupandseeAinsleystandingbehinduswithtearsinhereyes.She’s
dresseddownandiswearingglasses,butshe’sstillgotmycocktwitchingasIlookather.“Ains?Are
youokay?”

Sierra pushes me away and turns to see where I’m looking. “You’re Ainsley? My brother hasn’t

stoppedtalkingaboutyouallday.”

“Notallday.Ialsotalkedtoyouaboutyourlifeandfootball,”IremindherasIwalkpasthertosee

whyAinsley’scrying.“What’swrong?Areyouthinkingaboutlastnight?”

Sheshakesherheadandthenlooksdown.“I-Ithoughtyoutwowere…well…Ididn’tknowshewas

yoursister.”

It hits me like a freight train. How we would’ve looked to someone who didn’t know our

relationship.Yeah.Notsogood.EspeciallyafterIaskedhertotrustthatIwasn’tgoingoutwithsome
otherwoman.Ileandowntowhisperinherear.“Ishould’vetoldyouwhoI’dbewith,butIwantedto
haveyourtrust.Ididn’tmeantohurtyou.”

She’snotgoingforit.Icanstillseethehurtinhereyesasshesnifflesawaythelastofhertears.

“I’mgoingtogonowandletthetwoofyouenjoyyourdinner.”

“Youcouldjoinus.I’dlovetogettoknowyou,”Sierratellsher.
“Idon’twanttointrudeonyourtimetogether.”
I pull her chin up to make her look at me. “You wouldn’t be. Please join us.” I mean what I’m

sayingeventhoughI’malittlefreakedout.I’veneverbeenoutwithmysisterandanothergirlbefore.
She’smetacoupleoftheonesIwenthomewithwhileatthegames,butthere’sneverbeenanyone
whowasmorethanthattome.

“Umm, you don’t look so sure,” Ainsley tells me as she looks up into my eyes. I thought I was

hidingitbetter,butIguessIcan’treallyhidefromher.

MysisteranswersbeforeIcan.“Weare.”Inodmyagreement.
IchangethetablesizewiththehostessandtellherAinsleydoesn’tneedhertableanymore.Now

that things have slowed down a little for her, she recognizes me and we’re led to a table within
minutes. She tries to hand me her number, but I decline. The girls each sit on opposite sides of the
booth,andIimmediatelyslideinnexttoAinsley.

“Youdon’twanttositnexttoyoursister?”
“Nope.Shehascooties.”
“Jackass.”
Ishrugandpickupthemenu,tryingtofocusonordering.MythighispressedupagainstAinsley’s

intheboothandthecontactismakingithardformetoconcentrate.ShesquirmsalittleandIknow
she’saffected,too.Ijustneedtofigureoutwhyshe’sstillupset—becauseIcantellsheis—andthen
maybeshe’llletmekissheragain.

We’reallreadytoorderwhenthewaitercomesbackandthenAinsleyaskstogetoutofthebooth

soshecanusetherestroom.Iletheroutandthenwatchhergowithafrownonmyface.“Fuck.Ijust
keepscrewingthingsupwithher.”

“It’snotallonyou.Imean,I’mnotgonnalieorsugarcoatforyou.Sheshoulddefinitelybegun

shywithyourpreviousbehavior,butsheneedstogiveyouachance.”

“Itoldyouaboutlastnight.”
“Thatwasoneofthedumbestthingsyou’veeverdone.I’llgiveyouthat.Ifshereallywantstobe

withyou,she’llgiveyouanotherchancetoproveyou’vechangedandthatyouwerejustactingout.”

“Actingout?WhatamI,five?”
“Youreallydoactlikeitsometimes.”
“Thanks.”
“Anytime,bigbrother.”
I laugh with her and we joke around until Ainsley comes back. She still looks subdued, giving a

small smile and thank you when I let her back into the booth. She sips her water and looks around
everywherebutatme.Mysisterletsitgoonforafewminutes,butsheismysisterafterall,andshe’s
nothavingit.

“You’rereallythatupsetaboutmybrothersayingwhathedid,Ainsley?”
“Wh-what?”
“ThisisbecausehetoldmehowexcitedheisthatI’mgoingtothegametomorrow,isn’tit?”
Shelooksmysisterintheeyeandthennods.“Ihavetobethereforwork,butIthoughtmaybehe

washappyI’dbethereforhim,too.Idon’thavetobetheonehewantstheremorethananyoneelse,
but I’d like to be wanted.” She turns and looks at me, then. “I don’t expect you to tell me now, just
becauseyouknowIwantyouto.Thatwouldn’tmeananything.Ijusthopeitmeanssomethingtoyou
thatIwillbe.”

Holyfuckinghell.We’veonlyhadonegamesincewestartedhangingout,butIdidn’trealizethat

I’ve never said anything to her about how it made me feel to know she was there. That she was
cheeringforme.Andnotbecauseshewashopingtogetmetogoonadateortobedwithher.She

could have those things whenever she wants. No, she was there for me and I’ve never let her know
howmuchthatmeans.

I reach over and take her hand. “It’s everything to me that you’re going to be there, Ains.

Everything. I know you’ll be analyzing my play for the team and will help me do better. But I also
knowyou’rethereforme.Therealmeandnottheimage.LastweekwhenIsawyoujumpingupand
downaftermytouchdown,Ifeltlikethebiggest,mostimportantguyintheworld.BecauseIknewit
wasjustyourfriendZackyouwerecheeringfor.I’msorryIdidn’ttellyouthat.”

“Friend?Youtwoaresomuchmorethanfriends.I’mabouttocombustoverherejustfromtheheat

you’regenerating.Andyou’reonlyholdinghands.”

“Wearefriends,Sierra.We…I…Imean…wejusthangout.”
“Oh, I’ve heard. Believe me. I know all about these past two weeks. Let me tell you something,

though.Mybrotherhasneverhungoutwithawomanbefore.Goingtoluncheverydayisnotpartof
his agenda when it comes to women.” She turns to me as I frown. “Don’t act hurt. Everyone at this
tableknowswhatyou’vebeenlike.I’mjusttryingtogethertoseehowdifferentyouarewithherand
howmuchthatshouldmeantoher.”

“Itdoesmeanalotthatyou’rewillingtotakethingsslowforme.Butyesterday,itwasbad,Zack.

I’mnotevengoingtopretenditwasn’t.Youwereembarrassedtobeseenwithmeattheairportand
thenyoubroughtawomantoyourroom.Whetheryouweregoingtoreallydoanythingornotisn’t
reallyimportant.Justthatyoubroughtherethereandtookoffyourclothes.Ispentmostoftheday
remindingmyselfthatyousaidyouwantedonlyme,andtellingmyselftobelieveit,butIcan’tjust
forgetwhathappened.”

“I wasn’t embarrassed. I’d never be embarrassed of you. Ever. The woman last night was really

bad,IknowitandIownthatmistake.Nothingwasgoingtohappenwithher.Iswearit.Ijustwantedto
hurtyoubecauseIwashurtbywhatyousaidatMcCarran.”

“IownthatIhurtyou.WhatIsaidattheairportwashorrible.Ishouldn’thavereactedthatway.I

believe you when you say nothing would’ve happened with that woman. It was just a lot to take in,
especiallycoupledwithsomeonetryingtoattackme.”

“So what I’m hearing is that you both behaved badly—although my brother gets the award for

biggestasshole—andseemtobesorryaboutit.”Webothnod.“Nowyouneedtodecideifyoucanget
pastthatandgofucklikebunniesallnight.”

“Sierra!”
“I’mnotakid,Zack.Idon’tsleeparoundlikeyouhave,butI’vehadmyfairshareoffun.”
“Icouldusesomefun.”AllthebloodjustrushedtomycockandwhenIturnandseeAinsleybiting

herbottomlipaftersayingthat,Ican’tstopmyselffromleaningoverandkissingher.Idon’ttakeit
toofarsinceIstillhaveenoughfunctioningbraincellstorememberthatwe’reinarestaurant.With
mysister.

“Wecanhavefunlater,”IwhispertoherwhenIpullback.
“Okay.” She smiles shyly and then looks at my sister. “I’m sorry that we’ve been neglecting you

andyourlifewhileyoutriedtohelpuswithourproblems.”

“Noworries.Ijustwanttoseemybrotherhappy.I’dhopeditwouldbehere,butLasVegasseems

tobeworkingoutforhim.”

“Here?”
“Yeah.Itwasasecret,butIwassupposedtobetradedherebeforeJackofferedmyformerteama

better deal. I would’ve been able to keep an eye on my apparently wild sister. I’d bought a house
already.Iwasreallyangryaboutit,butnowthingsseemtobeturningaround.”

“Oh.Ididn’tknow.”Shehasaweirdlookonherface.

“No one did. It was really kept quiet and then, well, it didn’t happen. Like I said, I’m happy now,

though.Veryhappy.Theteamisgreatandyou,well,youmakeitallevenbetter.”

Therestofdinnergoessmoothly;although,Istillfeellikesomething’salittleoff.AinsleyandI

eatoffeachother ’splateslikewestarteddoingforlunchafewdaysago.Ilikeit.Ilikeher.Idon’t
knowwherethisisgoing,butIfeelhappierthanI’vefeltinareallylongtime.

***

Ainsley

I’mfreakingoutalittle.Okay,alot.Zackhasamotiveforsabotagingtheteam.He’ssoclosetohis

sister and he was going to be living near her until Jack Rivers dashed those plans. I don’t want to
believe that he’s involved, but I can’t ignore what I just found out. I’ve got a job to do and my
emotionscan’tinterferewithdoingit.

We’reonourwaybacktothehotel.Sierrainsistedondrivingusbothback.I’mtextingReinafrom

thebackseatwhiletheytalkupfront.

Me:Ihaveaproblem.
Reina:What’swrong?
Me:ZackTaylorwassupposedtobetradedhereandhadboughtahousealready.Hissister,

whohe’sreallycloseto,liveshere.JackmadeabetterofferandhewenttoVegasinstead.

Reina:Well,shit.Nowwehaveanothersuspect.How’dyoufindout?
Me:IhaddinnerwithZackandhissister,Sierra.
Ittakesheracoupleminutestorespond.IknowReinaandsoIknowshe’stryingtofigureouthow

toaskmewhyIwasatdinnerwiththem.I’llhavetoanswerhonestly.

Reina:Spill.
Me:Ilikehim.Alot.We’vebeenhavinglunchtogetheralmosteveryday.
Reina:Likeasinyouwanttoplayfootballwithhim?Orlikeasinyouwanttohavehotsex

withhimallnight?

Me:Optionnumber2,althoughIWOULDplayfootballwithhim,too.
Reina:Areyoualone?
Me:No.I’mthecarwiththem.
Reina:I’mgoingtocallyouandaskyouyesornoquestions.
Afewsecondslatermyphonerings.“Sorry,Ihavetotakethis.”
“Noproblem,Ains,”Zacktellsmewithasmile.
“HiReina.What’sup?”
“Isthisgoingtobeaproblemforyou?”
“No.”
“Areyouplanningonsleepingwithhim?”
“Yes.”
“Iftheevidencepointstohim,willyoubeabletotakehimdown?”
“Absolutely.” I mean it, too. If Zack’s the bad guy, I will take him down. It’s my job and I’m

committedtoit.

“That’snotayes,butIbelieveyou.Justbecareful.He’snotarelationshipguyfromwhatI’veseen

andread.Okay?”

“Yes.Thanks.”
“You’rewelcome.I’mgoingtohaveTeganlookintothisnewdevelopment.”
“Thatwouldbegreat.”

I hang up with her and then look up to see Zack turned around in his seat, looking at me. “Is

everythingokay?Youhadalotofonewordanswersgoingon.”

“Yeah,everything’sfine.Myfriend,Reina,justhadsomequestionsformeaboutsomethingwe’re

workingontogether.”It’snottechnicallyalie.

“Cool.Justtryingtobeagoodfriendandmakesureyou’realright,”hetellsmewithawinkand

thenturnsbackaround.

Friend?Ijustgotfriendzonedagain?Storyofmylife.Ohwell,thatwillmakethingseasier.For

workatleast.Sierrameetsmyeyeintherearviewwindowandgivesmeasympatheticsmile.

We arrive at the hotel a few minutes later and I thank Sierra before getting out of the car. I

practicallyruninside.Iseethewomanfromlastnight—theoneZacktookbacktohisroom—inthe
lobby.Ihearasquealandturnintimetoseehergrabhimintoahug.Hedoesn’tseemtobeprotesting
oruntanglinghimself.Iguessthat’swhohe’llbehavingfunwithtonight.

I’m close to breaking down even though I knew better than to get my hopes up. The elevator is

takingforever,soIhurryovertothestairwell.It’sonlytenfloorsandI’mingoodshape.Icantotally
dothis.

I’vebarelymadeittothesecondfloorwhenIhearthedoorbelowmebangopen.“Ains?”
Ileanbackagainstthewallbeforeanswering.There’snopointinrunning.He’sfasterthanme,and

webothknowit.“Yeah?”

Zackisinfrontofmeinlessthanaminute.“Whatthefuckareyoudoing?Youwereattackedlast

nightandnowyou’retakingthestairs?Whatifsomeonewaswatchingyou?”

“Noone’sgoingtolookatmewhentherearesexywomeninthelobby.”Ilookdownatmyjeans,

t-shirt,andChucks.Idresseddowntonight,thinkingIwouldn’tseeanyone.Yeah,Zackdidn’tseemto
mindmyoutfitandglasseswhenhekissedme,butthenhe“friended”meandwashuggingthatother
womanwhowasbustingoutofherdress.

“Isthisaboutthechickinthelobby?Imean,comeon.ItoldyouIwasn’tgoingtodoanythingwith

her.Ifeltalittlebadforusinghertomakeyoujealous,soIletherhugme.ItoldherIwasnolonger
interested,though.”

Ipushmyglassesuponmynoseandtrytowalkpasthim.“That’snice.Ireallywanttogettomy

roomandgotosleep.”

“Ithoughtweweregoingtohavesomefun.”Heputshisarmouttostopme.
“Yeah.WecanwatchTVorsomethingifyouwant.”
“TV?”
“Isn’tthatwhatfriendsdo?”
Hebacksmeuptothewallandbracesahandoneithersideofmyfacewhileleaningintome.“I

think you and I are gonna be doing a lot of things normal friends don’t do, babe. But I won’t stop
callingyoumyfriend.Becauseyouare.You’realsothehottestwomanIknow,andIwanttofuckyou
sobadmycockhurtsmostdaysjustthinkingofbeingburiedinyou.”

“EvenwhenIlooklikethis?”
“Ohyeah.You’retotallyrockingthesexynerdlook.”
Ireachupandputmyarmsonhisbiceps,rubbingthemashecloseshiseyes.ThenIleaninand

kissthebottomofhisneck.“LeandownsoIcanhaveyourmouth,please.”

“Nothere.I’mnotgivingthesecurityguysashow.”
HepullsopenthestairwelldoorasIstepback.Ididn’teventhinkaboutthesecuritycameras.He’s

makingmeforgetthingsthatshouldbesecondnaturetome.Irealizethat,justforonenightatleast,I
wantthat.Iwanttoforgetcomputersandspystuff,whilethemanIcareformakeslovetome.

“Whatareyousmilingabout?”heasksaswewalktotheelevator.
“You.Andme.”

“Ilikethat.IwishIcouldbeinsideyoutonight.”
“I-Ithoughtthat’swhatweweregoingtodo,”Itellhimwhenwegetontheelevator.I’mnotthat

clueless.AmI?

“Nottonight.IknowIwon’tbeabletostoponcewestart,andIdohaveagametomorrow.Ican’t

be up all night having you over and over again. Which means you’ll just have to use your mouth
tonight.”

“Excuseme?”Hedidnotjustsaythattome.
“You’ll like it. Women get turned on with my cock in their mouth. I’ll get you off, too. I don’t

normallycare,butIwantyoutofeelgood.”

IslaphimbeforeIevenrealizewhatI’mdoing.“ItoldyoubeforethatIwasn’tgettingonmyknees

foryou.”

“IsaidI’dgetyouoff,too.Jesus,Ains,stopbeingsouptight.Imean,whatthefuck?”heasksashe

rubshisjaw.

“I’mnotthatgirl.Ican’tbelieveyoudon’tknowthat.Maybeyourfriend’sstillinthelobby.She’d

probablydowhatyouwant.”

“Shewould.”
“Great.Youshouldgofindher.”
Iruntomyroomoncetheelevatoropens,slammingthedoorbehindmeonceI’minside.ThenI

slidedownthedoorandcry.Uglycry.Ithoughthecaredaboutme.Thathewastheone,likeinall
thosestupidmoviesandbooks.Iknowbetterthantobelieveinthefairytale,butforonce,Iwantedto.

CHAPTER6

Zack

Lastnightsucked.AndnotintheliteralwayIwashopingitwould.Ican’tbelieveAinsleygotso

pissed.Ineveroffertogetagirloff,butIwasgoingtodoitforher.Ijustwantedsomereciprocal
action.

Ican’tthinkaboutthatnowsinceI’vegotagametoplay.Andwin.Weneedthiswin,andalthough

beingsexuallyfrustratedisn’tfun,maybeIcanchannelthatintosomeactiononthefield.After,Ican
findsomeonewillingtogivemetheotheractionIneed.

Thefirstquarterisrough.We’reneckandneck.WhenIscorethetouchdownthatpullsusahead,I

automaticallylooktothesidelines.IwanttoseeAinsleyreact.Shealwayspumpsmeup.ButwhenI
looktoher,she’snotreacting.Imean,she’sclapping,butthat’sit.

ItearmyeyesfromherandlooktowhereSierra’ssitting.She’sjumpingupanddown,andIsmile

at her. I need Ainsley to do that. Just because it’s not going to work for us sexually doesn’t mean
we’renotfriends.Doesit?

Iplaythebestgameofmylife,makingfourtouchdowns.Everyfuckingtimeshejustclaps.Even

whenthelastonewinsusthegame.Idon’tlikethisatall.

Istormintothelockerroom,butmanagetolaughandsmileforthepost-gameinterviews.After

we’re dressed, Ainsley comes in like she always does to go over the game. She congratulates
everyoneandtellsuswhatwedidrightandwhatwedidwrong.Theotherguysallnodasshegives
themtheirinfo.Iclenchmyjawwhenshegetstome.

“Didyouhearme,Zack?”
“Iheardyou.”
“Youdidn’treact.”
“IsaidIheardyou.”
“Okaythen.I’llseeyouguysbackinVegas.”
“You’renotflyingwithus?”
“No.IhaveafewthingsIneedtodohere,soI’mcatchingalaterflight.”
She looks me in the eye, and I know this has to do with me. I also know that things aren’t going

backtonormalwithus.Ididn’tactlikeshewantedmeto,soshe’sdonewithme.Justlikeeveryother
friendIhadwhenIwasyounger.Ifthat’sthewayshewantsit,thenthat’swhatshe’llget.ClassicZack
Tayloratyourservice.

“Didyoufinallyfindaguy,Ainsley?That’ssosweet.Don’tforgettouseprotectionandremember,

thefirsttimemayhurtalittle.”

“Gottohell,Zack,”shetellsmeassheturnsandstormsfromtheroom.
“Crazywoman,”Isaywithalaughwhenshe’sgone.
No one’s laughing with me, though. I look around, and the few guys who catch my eye are just

shakingtheirheads.Shit.Iwenttoofar.She’searnedtheirrespect,andIjustembarrassedher.They’re
onherside.What’sweirdisIactuallywantthemtobe.

Imakemyselflookbusyforafewminutesandthenwalkoutofthelockerroomtofindmysister.

Sincewe’reheadedtotheairportfromhere,thisismylastchancetoseeher.MyheartsinkswhenI
getintothehallandseeher.Shehasherarmscrossedoverherchest,andshelookspissed.

“Hey,Si.”
“Istheresomeplacewecantalk?”
“I-Idon’tknow.Maybe?”
“Findout,please.”
I swallow hard and then go back into the locker room. Coach tells me I can use the office they

assignedhimforthegame.Hedoesn’tlookhappyaboutit.Ormaybeit’sjustmehe’snothappywith.
Jointheclub.

IwalkSierrathere,dreadingeverystep.Mysisterhasalwaysbeenonmyside.Always.IfIdon’t

haveher,Ihavenothing.

“Whatthefuckiswrongwithyou?”sheasksoncethedoorisclosed.
“Alotofthings.You’llneedtobemorespecific.”
“YouknowexactlywhatI’mtalkingabout.”
“You’regoingtoletsomechickcomebetweenus?Really?Ithoughtyouwerealwaysonmyside.”
“I am on your side and that’s why I’m pissed. And don’t refer to Ainsley as ‘some chick.’ You

didn’tjustplaythebestgameofyourlifebecauseshewassomeonerandom.”

“IplayedthebestgameofmylifebecauseIwantedtowin.Ithadnothingtodowithher.”
“Bullshit. You looked over at her after every touchdown. I was actually pissed at her because I

thoughtshewasbeingabitchuntilIsawhercomeoutofthelockerroombarelyholdingittogether.
Shetoldmewhatyousaidtoher.Lastnightandjustnow.”Shepausestoreachformyhand.“Ilove
yousomuch,Zack.WhenIsawyouwithAinsleyattherestaurantlastnight,Iwassorelieved.Iworry
about you objectifying women. I know how hurt you were in high school and college, but it has to
stop.IthoughtithadwhenIsawyoukissherandholdherhand,butthenyouaskedhertogetonher
kneesforyouandwhat’sevenworse,embarrassedherbecauseshedidn’tbehavelikeyouwantedher
to.”

“I offered to get her off, too. I never offer that to women. And she obviously doesn’t care. My

touchdownsmeantnothingtoher.”

“Ireallywanttoslapyourightnow.Doyouevenhearyourself?AmIjustsupposedtodroptomy

kneesifsomeguywantsmeto?Becausehe’llgetmeoff,too.NevermindthatIwanttobeheldand
caredfor.HavesomeonetellmeI’mbeautifulandkissmesweetly.”

“Fuck.”Iscrewedup.Bad.Sierradeservesthosethings,andsodoesAinsley.
“Andshecheeredforyouallthewayintotheendzone.”
“What?”
“She was jumping up and down, screaming all the while until you got there because she knew

you’dlookather.Then,shepolitelyclapped.Sheneededtohavesomeself-respectafterlastnight.”

“Really?Shedid?”
“Yes.Andthenyouembarrassedherinfrontoftheteam.Shedoesn’tthinkshecangobacktowork

tomorrow.”

“What?Shehasto.Weneedher.Plustheguyswereallonherside.I’mluckyImadeitoutofthere

alive.”

“Shedoesn’tknowthat.Allsheknowsisthattheguyshecaresabouttreatedherlikeaslutandthen

embarrassedher.”

“Shit.Ineedtocallher.”
“Yes,youdo.”
Idial,butshedoesn’tanswer.Damnit.Ididn’twanttotextitalltoher,butIguessIhaveto.

Me:I’msorry,Ains.ForlastnightANDtoday.Youdidn’tdeserveanyofthat.Iwanttomake

ituptoyou.

Ainsley:Really?
Me:YES!!!!Icareaboutyou,andIwanttoshowyou.Pleaseletme.
Ainsley:CanIbeyourdatefortheballonFriday?
Ican’tdothat.Ijustcan’t.Goingpublicwithherisn’tanoptionforme.I’veneverdonethat,and

I’mnotready.

“What’swrong,Zack?”
“Shewantstobemydateforthecharityballtheteam’sthrowingonFriday.”
“That’sgreat.”
“No.It’snot.I’mnotreadytogopublic.”
“Yes,youare.Youcareabouther.Takeachance,bigbrother.”
“No.”
Me:Ican’tdothat.Idon’ttakedatestothosethings.Givemeanotheroption.
Twenty minutes later I’m still staring at my phone. Clutching it so hard, I’m surprised it doesn’t

break.She’snotanswering,whichmeansthere’snootheroption.Ican’tdowhatshewants,butshe
wantsnothingelse.Iguessthisisit.

“Youwon’treconsider?”
“No.Therehastobesomethingelse.”
“I don’t think there is. She wants a grand gesture from you, and there’s nothing bigger than you

takinghertoaparty.Likeyousaid,youneverdothat.”

“I’mnotreadyforthat,Si.”
“Yes,youare.Youjustdon’tknowityet.”
BeforeIcananswer,there’saknockatthedoor.It’stimeformetoleave.IpullSierraintomyarms

andhughertight.

“Iloveyou.”
“Loveyou,too.ThinkaboutwhatIsaid.Please.”
Ican’tpromiseheranything,soIdon’t.

***

Ainsley

Knowingsomeone’snevergoingtobeyourboyfriendmakesinvestigatingthemeasier.Iaskedfor,

andwasgiven,Mondayofffromtheteammeeting.Ithinktheyfeelsorryforme.Hell,Ifeelsorry
forme.Butthere’sajobtobedone.

ItalkedtomanypeopleSundaynightandMondaymorning.IfoundouthowmuchtheyloveZack

inthistown.Everyonewasexcitedwhenhesignedhere.Hewashangingoutaroundtown,andgotto
knowabunchofthelocals.Whenhewastraded,itwasablowtohimandthefriendshe’dmade.

“Hewasreallyangry,”Joe,alocaldinerowner,tellsme.Zackwaseatingathisrestaurantwhenhe

got the news. I told him I’m working on a biography of Zack, but I’d get his permission before
printinganything.“Ithoughthewasgoingtostartthrowingthings.Buthesaidherespectedmetoo
muchforthat.”

“Haveyoustayedintouch?”
“Ofcourse.Hebroughthissisterhereforbreakfasttheotherday.Hetoldmehehopestobetraded

backheresoon.SaysthingsmaynotworkoutinVegas.”

“Ihopeitworksoutforyouguys.Breakfastwasgreat.Thanksfortalkingtome.”

“You’rewelcome.Haveasafetrip.”
My trip back in was uneventful. I head straight to the office to debrief with Reina. While we’re

talking,IalsospilleverythingaboutZackandhowit’snotanissueanymore.

“Hedoesn’tcareenough,Iguess.”
“Whodoesn’tcareaboutyou,LittleMouse?”MattCorriganasksashewalksintoReina’soffice.
“It’snoneofyourbusiness,andstopcallingherthat.”
“Somepeopledon’tmindtheirnicknames.Youdon’t,doyouAinsley?”
Ishakemyhead.Ireallydon’tcarethatheandhisfriendscallmethat.Ikindoflikethattheyhavea

nicknameforme.“It’sfine.”

“See?”
“Maybebecausehersisn’tmeantasaninsult.”
“MaybeIshouldleavethetwoofyoualone.”
“Notuntilyoutellmeaboutthisguyofyours.”
“It’sZackTaylor.Andhe’snotmine.”
“He’snotanyone’s.ThatboygetsalmostasmuchplayasIdo.Stayawayfromhim.”
“Shecan’t.He’spartofhermission.”
“Youdidn’tsleepwithhim?”
“No.Wejusthaveluncheverydayandhangout.Oratleastwedid.”
“Zackdoesn’t‘hangout’withchicks.”
“Women.”
“Excuseme,Princess.Women.”
“Hedidwithme.”
“Well,shit.You’vebrokenhim.Iknowguyslikehim.Ifhe’shangingoutwithyouinanon-sexual

way,he’shooked.”

“Obviouslyhe’snot.Hewon’ttakemetotheballonFriday.”
“Then I’ll take you. I’d love to watch him crumble. He stole twins out from under me a couple

monthsago.Iowehimalittlepain.”

“Youdon’tevertakeadatetothosethings,”Reinatellshim.
“MaybeIhaven’tfoundtherightgirl.”
“Iguessnot.Excuseme,I’vegottogo.Havefunonyourdate.”
ReinapracticallyrunsfromtheroomandIturntoglareatMatt.“Whyareyoulikethatwithher?”
“Likewhat?”
“You pretend you don’t care. But I’ve seen the way you look at her when you think no one’s

watching.”

“We both know she’s too good for me. So just drop it, please. I’ll pick you up at 6 on Friday.

Okay?”

“I’mnotsureweshould.Reina…”
“She’llbefine.It’sreallynotlikethatwithus.Doyouwantmetotakeyouornot?”
“Yes,Ido.Thanks,Matt.”
“Anytime.”

***

Zack

This ball is going to be the death of me and I’ve only been here for five minutes. I’ve already

turneddowntenwomen,andoneman.Currently,MissBJistryingherbesttoclimbme,eventhough

Ikeepmovingandtellinghertogoaway.

“Wow.That’sevencrazierthanifyoushowedupwithadate,”shesaystome.
Iturnandalmostdropmydrink.MattCorriganjustwalkedinwithAinsleyonhisarm.Whatthe

fuckisshedoingwithhim?He’stentimestheman-whorethatIam.Orwas.Andthischick’sright.
He’dneverbringadatetooneofthesethings.Unlesshe’sseriousabouther.Wassheplayingmeall
along?No.Iknowshewasn’t.

Ainsley’slookingbeyondhot.Thetopofherstraplessblackdressisleatherandthebottomhasa

wrapskirtwithaslitthatgoestothetopofherthighontheleft.Imovemyeyesuptoherfaceandsee
thatshe’sscowlingatmycrotch.I’mconfuseduntilIrealizethatthisstupidchickispalmingmycock
throughmypants.Iimmediatelypushheraway.

“Get the fuck off of me. How many times do I have to say no before you get it. Don’t put your

handsonmeagain.”

IknowIwasloud,butIdon’tcare.I’malreadydealingwithCorriganshowingupwiththewomanI

want.Idon’tneedawomanwhoIdon’twantscrewingthingsupevenworsethantheyalreadyare.I
lookbacktothehappycouple,andheliftshischinatmewhilesmirking.Heknows.Asshole.

Ireallyhavenoroomtotalk.I’vebeenthebiggestassinthiswholemess.Whycouldn’tIjustget

past my stupid insecurities and bring Ainsley here? Because I was worried about everyone’s
reactions. My sister ’s right. I need to get over my shit. Especially with Corrigan moving in on my
girl.Whoisn’tmygirlbecauseIgotinmyownway.Ihavetofigureouthowtofixthis.Therehasto
beaway.

Dinnerisanotherformoftorturesincethey’resittingatthesametableasme.Igotpairedwiththe

daughter of some CEO, and I have to keep moving her hand off my thigh. While I watch Corrigan
makeAinsleylaugh.Butsheisn’teatingoffofhisplate,somaybeIstillhaveashot.

“Excuseme,butcanIborrowZack?”theladyfromthecharityasksasshewalksuptoourtable.
“Me?”
“Yes,IhaveasurprisethatI’dliketotalktoyouabout.”
“Okay.Iguessso.”
Igetupandfollowhertothedancefloor.Shehasmeleandownsoshecanwhisperwhatshewants

inmyear.Ismileandwhisperback.SierrasaidIneedagrandgesture;well,thisseemsprettygrand.

***

Ainsley

Thisnighthasbeenfun,buthard.Matthasbeenmakingmelaugh,buthe’snotwhoIwant.Iwantto

sitnexttoZackandeatoffhisplatewhilehemakesmelaugh.Atleasthepushedthatwomanoffof
him and told her not to touch him. He’s been polite with the woman they’ve seated next to him, but
nothingmore.

Nowhe’sonthedancefloorwhisperingwiththewomanwho’sinchargeoftheparty.Helooksmy

wayandsmiles.Thatthrillsme,yetalsoscaresmealittle.

“Can I have everyone’s attention, please?” she says into the microphone. “Thank you all for

comingandhelpingtoraisemoneyforthecharity.IjustaskedZackTaylorhereifwecouldauction
offadancewithhim,buthejustturnedthetablesonme.Hetellsmethere’sonlyonewomanhe’dlike
todancewithandhe’swillingtodonate$100,000forthathonor.Gogetyourwoman,Zack.”

IclosemyeyesbecauseIwantittobeme,andifitisn’tImightdieinside.Mattwhispersinmyear

toletmeknowthatitisme.“Loverboy’sheadedthisway,LittleMouse.”

IopenmyeyesandZack’sinfrontofme,withhishandheldout.Ipracticallyjumpoutofmychair

asMattchucklesnexttome.ThesecondIplacemyhandinhis,Zackpullsmetohimandkissesme
sweetlyonthemouth.Heleanshisforeheadagainstmineandwhispers,“Pleasedancewithme,Ains.I
should’vebeentheonetowalkinherewithyou.I’msorryIwasn’t.”

“I’lldancewithyouifyoupromisethatyou’llbewalkingoutofherewithme.”
“WhataboutCorrigan?”
“He’sjustafriendwhoofferedtodomethefavorofbeingmydate.”
“That’sabigfavorforhim.”
“He’saverygoodfriend,andhesaidheowedyou.Somethingaboutasetoftwinsafewmonths

back.”

“Shit.Hemorethangotmebackbyhavingyouonhisarm.Ipromiseyouthat.”
“I’dlovetokeeptalking,butI’msurepeoplearestaring.”
“Good. I want them to stare and realize how crazy I am about you. But I’ll dance with you now

becausethatmeansIcankeepyouinmyarms.”

Hewalksusontothedancefloorandpullsmecloseasthemusicstarts.Weswaytothemusicand

sharelittlekissesthroughoutthesong.I’mhopingthatwecankeepdancingbecauseIlovethefeelof
Zack’s hands on my waist and his mouth on mine. The world, or more accurately, Matt, has other
plans.

“Attention everyone, we’ve had another generous offer for this young lady’s time,” the charity

womanannounces.Zack’shandstightenonmywaist,andIseehisjawclench.“MatthewCorriganhas
offeredonemilliondollarsforsomedancesforhimselfandnineplayersfromtheLegionsfootball
team.Whatdoyousay,mydear?”

IlookupatZack.“It’sforcharity.Besides,withthemit’lljustbedancing.”Henods,andIturnto

thewoman.“Sure,whynot?”

“Wonderful,”shesaysaspeopleclap.
Mattwalksup,andZackkissesmehard.HeletsgoandthenglaresatMattasheplacesmyhandin

his.“Bastard.”

“Yep,Iam.Butsoareyou,Taylor.AndifyouhurtAinsleyagain,there’snoplaceonthisEarththat

youcanhidefromme,orherotherfriends.Justrememberthat.”

“That’senough,Matt.”
“Youknowit’strue.Yourgirlswouldhunthisassdown.”
IeyeMattdown.“Isaidthat’senough.Nowarewegoingtodance?”
“Yes,LittleMouse,we’redancing.”
Hestartstopullmetohim,butIturnandgrabZack.IkisshimasMattsighs.“I’llseeyousoon.”
HenodsandsmirksatMattashewalksaway.“You’remakingthistooeasyforhim.”
“He just told a whole room of people that I’m the only one he wants. He gave me my grand

gesture.”

“Yeah,hedid.I’llconcedethat.I’llalsotakecareofthewomantheysathimwith.”
“Thanks,Matt.”
“Anythingforyouandthegirls.Youknowthat.”
“Ido.”

***

Zack

If I thought this party sucked earlier, it was nothing compared to watching Ains dance with my

teammates.AndCorrigan.Idon’tknowhowtheybecamefriends,butIknowIdon’tlikeit.Especially
afterthestunthepulledtonight.

ThankGodshe’sonherlastdance.Idon’tknowhowmuchmoreIcantake.Yes,shelookedoverat

meandsmiledasoftenaspossiblewithoutbeingrudetoherdancepartners.SoIknowshe’snotinto
anyofthem.Iwantherbackwithme,though.Ievengrabbedussomedessertsfromthebuffettheyset
up.Ononeplate,ofcourse.

Thesongendsandshewalksovertothetable.Iwatchher,andthatfuckingslitinherdress,getting

a lot of male attention. I stand up and pull her to me, claiming her with my mouth. She chuckles
againstmylipsasIpullback.

“Do you think they all figured out that we’re together, or should you throw me over your

shoulder?”sheaskswhilesittingdown.

“Ithoughtyouwantedpeopletoknow.”NowI’mconfused.
“Ido.Ijustthinkit’sfunnythatittookmecomingherewithMattforyoutodecideyouwantedto

tellpeople.”

“Iwasbeinganass,butInevermeanttohurtyou.Ijustwantedtokeepwhatwehadprivate.You

knowthepresswillbealloverthis.”

“Becauseyouneverdate?”
“That,andbecauseyouworkfortheteam.They’realwaysonthelookoutforascandal.”
“JacktoldmeIshoulddateyou,sothere’snoscandal.”
“Hedid?”
“Yes.Hesaidthatyou’remorethanyouappeartobe,andifyouaskedmeout,Ishouldconsider

it.”

“He’sgreat.Ialreadyknewthat,butnowIneedtosendhimsomecigars.”
“Ifyouthinkhe’ssogreat,whydoyoustillwanttobetraded?”
“Imissmysister,Ains.Iwanttobenearher,butshewon’tmovehere.”
“Soyou’reseriousaboutthisthen.”
“Very.”
“Weshouldprobablyendthisbeforeitbeginsthen.BecauseI’mstayinginVegas.”
“What?Youjustgotthere.Ifthisworksout,youcouldmovewithme.Youwouldn’tneedtowork,

either.”

“SoI’djustbeyourkeptwoman?Never,Zack.Never.IworkforwhatIhave.”IrealizethatImay

havejustblownmycover,soItrytofixit.“Imean,yeah,myparentsusedtopayforeverything,butI
wanttobeindependentnow.”

“Shit.Ididn’tmeanitlikethat.Ilovethatyou’reindependent.IjustmeantthatIcouldsupportyou

ifyoudidn’thaveajob.Notthatyoucouldn’thaveone.”

“I’mstillnotmoving.Imaynothavebeenherelong,butI’vemadesomegoodfriendsandIreally

likeithere.”

“FriendslikeMattCorrigan?”
“Yes.Mattisagoodfriend.”
“Iwanttomakethiswork.”
“Iwon’tmove,andyouwon’tstay,soit’snotgoingtowork.Nomatterhowmuchwebothwantit

to.”

“Thiscan’tbetheendforus.”
“Ithastobe.I’dsaythatwecouldstillbefriends,butthatwouldbetoohardforme.I’llstillcheer

foryou,though.Ipromise.”

Ileanovertokisshimonthecheekbeforestandingupandwalkingoutoftheballroom.Ittakesa

bunchofdeepbreaths,andawillpowerIdidn’tknowIhad,todoit,butImakeitoutoftherewithout
crying.Idon’tstopwalkinguntilIgettovalet.Ihavenochoicebuttostopthereandsitononeofthe
benchestowaitformycar.Ijustwanttogohomeandsleep.

CHAPTER7

Zack

Ijustgotoffphonewithmysister,andnowIneedtofindMattCorrigan.Ifhe’sstillhere.Ilook

aroundandfinallyspothimatoneofthemoresecludedtables.He’ssurroundedbyseveralbeautiful
women, which isn’t surprising. What is surprising is that the vibe coming off of their table isn’t
sexualatall.They’relaughinglikeoldfriends.MattlooksupasIwalkoverandscowlsatme.

“Where’sAinsley?”
“Sheleft.Iwashopingyouhadheraddress.”
“You fucked up again? Seriously? I don’t know how someone with no game can get so many

women.”

“I’vegotplentyofgame,butAinsley’snotlikethat.Iwouldn’ttrytoplayher.Ineedtotalktoher,

though.”

“I’mgladthatyourealizeshe’snotlikeotherwomensoIdon’thavetocutyourballsoff.”Thisis

saidtomebyastunningwomanwithlongbrownhair.She’stwirlingasteakknifeinherhandand
glaringatmeoutofheralmondshapedeyes.

“Umm,yeah,okay.Areyougoingtotellmehowtofindher,ornot?”IaskMatt.
“Not.He’snottellingyoushit,”theplatinumblondepin-upgirlsittingnexttohimsays.
“Whoareyoupeople?Andwhydoyoucarewhetherhetellsmeornot?”
“We’re Ainsley’s friends and we know all about you, Zack. Give us one good reason why we

shouldhelpyou.Youonlygetone,somakeittherightone,”saystheredheadontheothersideof
Corrigan. She crosses her legs, and I see cowboy boots peeking out from beneath her gown.
Interesting.

“Shethinkswecan’tbetogetherbecauseIwantedtomovetowheremysisterlives.Ijustcalledmy

sisterandtoldherthatIwanttobewhereAinsleyis,soI’mnolongergoingtotrytogettraded.She
likesAinsley,sosheunderstands.”

A beautiful Latin woman, who looks to be a little older than me, speaks up. “We’ll tell you, but

you’rerunningoutofyourninelives.Whenthathappens,youhavetodealwithallnineofus.”

“Plusme.Don’tforgetme,Audrey,”Corriganadds.
“Likeweevercould.Here’stheaddress.Wealllivethere,soI’llcalltheguardatthegateandtell

himtoletyouin.”

AfterthankingherIplugtheaddressintomyphone’sGPS.Irushoutoftheroomandpickupmy

SUVfromthevalet.WhenIgettohergatetwentyminuteslater,theguardsendsmethrough.Ipark
andrunintothebuilding.WhatIseemakesmesmile.

Ains is in the lobby, still wearing her gown. She’s added her glasses and is sitting behind the

securitydesktappingkeysononeofthecomputers.It’sallkindsofhot.Iknowitshouldn’tbe,and
I’veneverthoughtofnerdygirlsasparticularlysexybefore,butfuckifshe’snot.

“HowmayIhelpyou,sir?’oneoftheguardsasksme.
“I’mhereforher.”
Ainsley’sheadshootsup.“Zack?Whatareyoudoinghere?Howdidyoufindme?”

“Ihaveasolutiontoourproblem.Yourfriendsgavemeyouraddressandcalledtheguardatthe

gatetoletmein.”

“Whatsolutioncouldyouhavepossiblyfound?”
“IcalledmysisterandtoldherIwasstayingwithyou.”
Hereyesgowide.“Ican’tletyoudothat.YouloveSierra.”
“Idoloveher,butIalsoknowI’mfallinginlovewithyou,Ains.”
“Youare?”
“Yes.”
“I’malmostdonehere.Doyoumindwaitingafewminutes?Wecangouptomyapartment,and

talkwhenIfinish.”

“I’llwaitaslongasyouneedmeto.”
Ilookaroundandnoticethatthere’snowaitingarea,leasingoffice,oranythingreally.That’skind

ofweird.IjustleanonthesecuritydeskasIwatchherwork.Shefinishesupquicklyandstandsup.

“Everything’stakencareof,Kenny.”
“Thanks,Ainsley.”
“Letmeknowifyouhaveanyproblems,andI’lltakecareofit.”
“Ofcourse.Nowgospendsometimewithyouryoungman.”
Ainsleysmilesatmeasshetakesoffherglassesandputsthembackinherlittlepurse.“Thanksfor

waiting,Zack.”

“Ofcourse.”
Ireachouttotakeherhandasshecomesaroundthesideofthedesk.Sheleadsmetotheelevators

and uses her palm to activate them. It’s like something out of a spy novel, and I really want to ask
aboutit,aboutthisbuilding,butIcantellshe’snervous,soIwon’t.Whocaresthatshelivesinsome
highsecurityplace?

Shedoesn’tletgoofmyhandasweridetheelevatoruptothefourteenthfloor,butshe’squietthe

entiretime.Iwanttotalktoher,butIseeheranxietygettingworseaswegetclosertoherapartment.
Whenwegetofftheelevator,shestopsinfrontofherdoorandlooksdown.

“It’snotgirly,orsexy,orsophisticated.”
“Yourapartment?”
“Yes.IhavebigscreenTVs,gamingsystems,andabunchofcomputers.That’sit.Ifyouwantto

leavenow,I’llunderstand.”

Leave?Isshecrazy?Idon’tgiveafuckwhatherapartmentlookslike.Iturnheraround,andback

her against the door as I pepper her mouth with little kisses. “Do you have a bed? Or at least a
couch?”

“Y-yes.Ihaveboth.”
“Thennothingelsemattersrightnow,”Itellherhonestly.“Unlessyouaren’treadyforthat.Then

I’lltakethegrandtourandloveitall.Becauseit’syours.Nowletusin,babe.”

***

Ainsley

Iturnbacktothedoortoopenit,holdingmybreathasIwalkintotheapartment.Zackfollowsme,

andletsoutalowwhistle.“Thisisfuckingawesome,Ains.Wow.”

Ilookaround,andtrytoseemyplaceasheseesit.ChloeGriffingavemeamodernloftvibewhen

shedesignedit.Myceilingshavepipesandbeamsexposed,thewallsarebricked,andeverythingis
open.Mybedroomisupthestairs,andlikearealloft,it’sexposedtotherestoftheapartment.The

onlyroomswithdoorsarethebathroomsandmyworkroom.Iloveit,andIguessaguywouldlove
it,too.

“It’saguy’sdream,Iguess.”
“No.Imean,yeahitis,butIalsomeantthatit’sso‘you.’Whichmakesitevenbetter—sexier.Ilove

it.”

“Youthinkit’ssexy?Really?”Iwalkovertohimandputmyarmsaroundhisneck.
“Notassexyasyou,butyeah.Ican’thelpbutthinkofalltheplacesinhereIcanhaveyouontop

of.”Heputshishandsonmywaistandpullsmecloser.

“Youcan,youknow.Haveme,Imean.”
“Good,becausethisslitinyourdresshasbeenmakingmecrazyallnight,”hetellsmeasheslides

onehanddownandinsidetheslittocaressmythigh.

“IwantedtoripthistuxoffofyouthesecondIsawyouinit.”
“Let’sgoupstairsandthenyoucanripaway.Iwantourfirsttimetobeinabed.”
Hepicksmeup,andIwrapmylegsaroundhimashewalksupthestairs.Whenwegettomybed,

hestandsmeonmyfeetandturnsmearound.“Ifthiswasn’tourfirsttime,I’dleavethedressonand
justspreaditopenasIfuckedyouhardagainstthewall.Butyoudeservebetterthanthat,soI’mgoing
totakeitoffofyouandmakelovetoyouslowandsweet.”

“Thenyou’llfuckmehardagainstthewall?”
“Hell,yeah,ifthat’swhatyouwant.”
“Yes,please.”
“You’remakingitveryhardformetotakethingsslow,butI’mgoingto.”
He slowly lowers the zipper on my dress, following his fingers with his mouth. When the dress

falls to the ground, he stops kissing me and doesn’t say anything for a minute. I start to feel self-
consciousandpullaway,buthestopsmeandturnsmetofacehim.Hestillisn’ttalking,though.

“What’swrong,Zack?”
“Notadamnthing.You’resobeautiful.Allofyou.Iwanttoexploreeveryinchofyourbeauty.”
“Iwanttoexploreyou,too,butyouhaveallyourclotheson.Iknowwhatyoulooklikeinjustyour

underwear,andit’skillingmerightnow.”

HesmilesatmethenpullsoffhisjacketandbowtiewhileIattackhisshirt.Buttonsgoflyingashe

laughsatme.“You’resohot,Ains.”

“YousaidIcouldripitoff.”
“Ididindeed.”
I undo his belt and pants while he kicks off his shoes. Now we’re both standing here in our

underwear.Iseethebulgeinhisboxerbriefs,anditmakesmymouthgodry.Ilickmylips,andthen
he’sonme.

Webothfallbackontomybed,ashekissesmefrantically.Iwrapmylegsaroundhimagainand

rubagainsthimlikesomecatinheat.Ican’thelpit.I’vebeenfantasizingabouthimfortoolongnow.

“Slow.Slow.Slow,”Zacksaysashereleasesmylips.Ithinkhe’stryingtoremindhimself,more

thanme,ofwhathesaidearlier.

“Iwon’tbreak,Zack.”
“I know. But you deserve to be loved, not fucked, and kissed sweetly. I want to make you feel

special.Becauseyouare.”

Heleansdownandkissesmesoftlyasthewallsaroundmyheartcomecrashingdown.Ijustfellin

lovewithZackTaylor.Correction.IjustadmittedtomyselfthatI’minlovewithZackTaylor.

Hecontinuesthesweetandslowashemovesfrommymouthtonibbleonmyjaw.Myneckcomes

next. I feel like I’m going to come out of my skin by the time he reaches my collarbone and licks
acrossit.Iarchintohimashesucksontheswellsofmybreastsandundoesthefrontclaspofmybra.

“Gorgeous.Youaresofuckinggorgeous.Thesearegorgeous,”hesaysashetakesonebreastis

hishandandtheotherinhismouth.

Icryoutashelicksandsucksme,givingeachnippleitsturnwhileheuseshisfingerontheother

one.ThenI’mwhimperingasheabandonsthemtomovetomyribs.Heleansbackupandblowson
thewetnessheleftbehind,causingmybacktobowupoffthebed.

“Don’tworry.I’llbebackforthemagainlater.”
He kisses along my ribs, then stomach, stopping to play with my belly button for a minute. Who

knewthatcouldbesosexy?Myhipsgetsomeattentionbeforeheleansback,slideshishandsintothe
sidesoffmythongandpullsitoff.

“You’renotbare,”hesayslookingmildlysurprised.
“N-no. My friend, Stella, wanted me to…but it looked too painful. I keep it trimmed, though.” I

movetocovermyself.Ishould’vejustenduredthepain.

“Don’tyoudarecoveryoursexypussy.Ilikeit.Actually,Iloveit.Everythingaboutyouisreal.

Youhavenoideahowmuchthatturnsmeon.”

Hetracesafingeracrossdownmyslit,betweenmywetlips,beforehebringsitbacktohismouth

for a taste. His eyes close and before I can worry too much, he lets out a satisfied moan. The only
warningIgetisawickedsmilefromhimashedropsbetweenmylegsandstartstracinghistongue
backandforth.SweetJesus.

HeslidesafingerinsideofmeandIstarttograsptheblankets.Mybody’swrithinguncontrollably

nowwhileIgaspoutwordsthatdon’tevenmakesense.Thatseemstospurhimon.Headdsanother
fingerandalittlebitofteethashesucksmyclitharderintohismouth.

IcomesohardI’mseeingstars.I’malsoactivelyfuckinghisface,whichshouldembarrassme,but

itdoesn’t.Ican’teventhinkstraightasIslowlycomedownfromtheheavenshesentmeto.

“OhmyGod,Zack.Ididn’tknow…Imean,myfriendssaid…ohGodthatwasamazing.”
“Noone’smadeyoucomebefore?”
“No. I mean, I have some toys, so I’ve made myself come, but the few guys I’ve been with were

moreinterestedinthemselves.”

Hesighsashegetsonhiskneesandlooksaway.“I’musuallylikethat,too.Idon’tevenremember

thelasttimeIactivelytriedtomakeawomancome.”

“Youwereveryactiveinmakingmecomejustnow.”
“You—you’regoingtobecomingallnight.Makingyoucomealmostmademecome.”
“Doyouwantmeto…umm…returnthefavor?IknowIsaidIwouldn’t,butIwill.”
“Yes,Iwantthat.Verybadly.Butnotnow.NowI’dliketobeinsideofyou.”
Inod,almostimpatiently,becauseofhowbadlyIwantthattoo.
Heclimbsoffthebedandslipsoffhisbriefs.MydrymouthstartstowaterwhenIseehiscockfor

thefirsttime.Damn.It’sasperfectastherestofhim.Longandthick,butnottoobigtomakeitscary.
Andwhenhebendsovertogetacondomoutofhispants?Inearlyfaint.IswearIdo.IfIthoughthis
asslookedhotinhisfootballpants,well,nakedasswinshandsdown.

“Someonelikeswhatshesees.”
“Huh?”
“You’repracticallysquirmingoffthebed,babe.”
I realize he’s right. My body’s moving on its own, reacting to his body. I won’t be embarrassed,

though.“IdolikewhatIsee.”

“Good.Itwouldbebadifthiswasallone-sidedlust,”hetellsmeasheclimbsbackonthebed.He

holdsoutthecondom.“Wannaputiton?”

Inodfuriously.“Yes.”

Itakeitfromhimandopenthepackagewithmyteeth.ThenIreachoutandgrasphimasheletsout

ahiss.“Yourhandfeelssogoodonme.”

“I’llcomebacktoitlater,”Ipromisehim,echoinghiswordsfromafewminutesago.Thismakes

himlaugh.

Iplacethecondomonhisalreadywettipandrollitdown.Webothmoanasmyhandsglideover

hislength.Igettothebaseandthenleanuptokisshimlightlyonthelips.Icantastemyselfonhim,
whichisstrange,butniceatthesametime.

Hegentlypushesmebackonthebedandleansoverme.Ismileandnodathim,lettinghimknow

it’sokay.ThatI’mokay.Ifeelhimagainstmyentrance,andhegentlythrustsinsideofme.

Wow. Just wow. It feels so good as he moves in and out slowly. This is what my friends always

talkedabout.Theysaidsexwasthebest,butIjustneverunderstooditbefore.TheotherguysIwas
withnevermadeitfeellikethis.WithZack,Ifeeleverything.Andit’ssogoodthatIcan’teventhink
clearly.

“Youfeelsogood,Ains.Sowet,butstillniceandtightaroundmycock.”
“Itfeels…Idon’tevenknowhowtodescribeit.Ilovehavingyouinsideofme.”
Hekissesmeoverandoveragain,ashecontinuesmakingslowlovetome.Imovemyhandstohis

ass.Ineedtofeelit.Itfeelsevenbetterthanitlooks,andhegrowlsasIgrabittighttopullhimeven
furtherintome.

Ipullhismouthdowntome,andallgentlenessisgoneashethrustsharderandharderintome.I’m

cominginseconds,andhefollowsrightafterme.We’rebothleftpantingonceourshudderingstops.
Heslidesoutslowlyandexcuseshimselftothebathroom.

IstaywhereIam.I’mnotsureifIcouldmoveanyway.Zackcomesbackandpullsmeintohisarms

asheliesdownnexttome.Icuddleintohimandrubmyhandsoverhisimpressivechest,whichhasa
lightdustingofhairand,ofcourse,thoseunbelievableabsofhis.

“Bestever.Imeanit.”
“Really?”
“Yes. You destroyed me, then put me back together. And that was just our first time. I hope I can

surviveyou.IfIdon’t,thenatleastI’llgooutaveryhappyman.”

“Ihaven’thadmuchexperience,butthatwasthebestforme,too.”
“Glad to hear that. I really want to have you again, but I only brought that one condom. I don’t

usuallyneedmorethanone.”

“Ihavesome.MyfriendsalwaysmakesureIhaveasupplyonhand.Forwhat,Idon’tknow”
“Well,they’reformenow.AtleastIhopetheyare.”
“Ofcoursetheyare.Itfeelsreallynicetohaveyouholdmelikethis.”
“Yeah,itdoes.Ithinkthecondomscanwaitforalittlewhile.”Ismileathimandclosemyeyes.

CHAPTER8

Zack

Ainsley fell asleep before we could go for round two last night. I actually didn’t mind, though. I

mean,sure,Idefinitelywantheragain,butholdingherinmyarmswhileshesleptwaslikenothing
I’veeverfelt.Ifellasleepalittlewhilelaterandwokeupwithhersprawledacrossme.Veryniceway
towakeup,thankyouverymuch.

IhavetheurgetocookusbreakfastbecauseIliketotakecareofher,soIcarefullyslideoutfrom

underher.Iquietlythrowonmypantsandcheckherfridge.It’sremarkablywellstocked,soitdoesn’t
takelongbeforeI’mfinishingupomeletsandbreakfastpotatoes.I’mjustplatingthemwhenherfront
dooropens,andtwoofthewomenfromlastnightwalkin.

“Well,whatdowehavehere?OurlittleAinsleyhadasleepoverlastnightanddidn’tinviteus,”the

platinumblondesays.

Iknowshe’sbaitingme,butI’mnotgoingforit.“Youwouldn’thavebeenwelcome.Atleastnotby

me.”

“Orme,either.You’renotwelcomenow.”
Ainsleylooksangryassherunsdownthestairsinatanktopandyogapants.Likereallyangry.I’d

bescaredifshewaslookingatmelikethat.Thegirlsdon’tseemfazedatall,though.

“Calmdown.Wejuststoppedbytosayhi,”theredheadwiththecowboybootssays.
“No.Youcameovertospybecauseyoubothknowhedidn’tleave.Securitywould’vetoldyouifhe

did.”

“Fine.Weknewhewashere.Wejustwantedtomakesureyouwereokay.”
“I’mbetterthanokay,socanyoupleasegobeforeyouembarrassmeanyfurther?”
I finally speak up. “Don’t be embarrassed on my account, Ains. I like that you have friends who

careaboutyouenoughtocheckuponyou.”

“Ididn’tthinkI’dlikeyou,Football,butyoumightjustbeokay.”
“Hisabsaredefinitelyokay,Stella,”theredheadsayswithawink.
“ShutitTegan.Andgetout.Bothofyou.Out.”
“We’lltalklater.”
“Nowewon’t.Iplantobebusyallday.AndI’mlockingthedoor.”
She follows them to the door and locks the regular lock as well as the deadbolt. I can’t help but

laugh.IfIwasn’talreadyinlovewithher,Iwouldbenow.Ihavetoteaseheralittle.

“AmIyourprisoner,babe?Yougoingtokeepmelockedupinhereuntilweactoutallyoursexual

fantasies?”

“What?No.Imean,youcanleave.Ishouldn’thaveassumed…”
“Ohyes,yesyoushouldhave.I’mnotleavinguntiltonight.Andeventhenit’sonlybecauseIdon’t

have any other clothes to wear and I have a game tomorrow. Now come over here and have some
breakfast.”

Shewalksovertomeandpullsmyheaddownsoshecankissme.Wekissforafewminutes,untilI

breakaway,andsmackherontheass.Shelooksupatmeinshock.“I’mnotthatkindofgirl,Zack.”

“Iknow.Iwouldn’thityouanyharder,oranywhereelseonyourbody.Ijustneedyoutoeatthis

wonderfulmealIslavedoverthestovetomake.Andstopdistractingmewiththatamazingmouthof
yours.”

“DoIgettoslapyourass,too?”
“Afterweeat.”
Shesitsdown,andItaketheseatnexttoher.There’splentyofkissingandourlegsareentwinedas

weeat.Wecan’tkeepourhandsoffofeachother.Idon’tknowhowwe’regoingtobeabletoeatin
publicagainwithoutcausingascene.

We spend the rest of the day together playing video games, talking, and watching a couple of

movies.Wealsochristeneveryflatsurfaceandwallinherhouse.Andtheshower.It’shandsdownthe
bestdayofmylife,andthoughIdon’twantittoend,Idoneedtogetsomerest.

“I’llseeyouatthegametomorrow,babe,”ItellherasImakemyselfpullawayfromher.We’ve

beenmakingoutagainstmycarinthegarage,butIreallydoneedtogethome.

“I’llbetheonecheeringforZack,my…umm…”
“Ithinkthewordyou’relookingforis‘boyfriend.’”
“ThatisthewordIwaslookingfor.Howdidyouknow?”
“Becausethat’swhoIam.Yourboyfriend.AtleastIhopeIam.IthinkI’msupposedtoask.”
“Youaresupposedtoask,butI’llletitslide.I’llbeexpectingyourclassringandletterman’sjacket

sometimeinthefuturethough.”

“I’llhavetodigthemoutofstorageforyou,butthey’reallyours.SoamI.”
“Good.BecauseIdon’tshare.”
“NeitherdoI.
I give her one more kiss before getting in my car. We both have big smiles on our faces as she

blows me a kiss, and I catch it. I wasn’t sure I’d ever find a woman who just wanted me. Not the
footballsuperstar,buttherealguy.Ainsleydoes,though.There’snotonedeceptiveboneinherbody.

***

Ainsley

I’m smiling all the way up to my apartment. I have my first boyfriend, and he’s pretty awesome.

ThesmileslipsoffmyfacewhenIopenmyapartmentdoortoseeninewomenlounginginmyliving
room.Seriously?TheyactlikeI’mateenager,notatwenty-sixyearoldadult.

“Thatwasalonggoodbye,”Faithtellsme.
Iignoreherandwalktowardsthestairs.“Whereareyougoing,Ainsley?”
“I’mnotyourkid,Reina.Youdon’tneedtoallbeheretocheckonpoorlittleAinsley.”Iturnand

looktoStellaandTegan.“Andthismorningwithyoutwo?Wayoutofline.Sofarout,Idon’tknow
evenwhatfieldyouwereplayingon.”

“Wejustworryaboutyou.Youhaven’thadthatmuchexperience,andyoutoldusyou’veneverhad

aboyfriendbefore.ZackTaylor ’salittle…well…”

“Well what, Jade? Out of my league? Is that what you were going to say? Is that what you all

think?”

“No.Wethinkyou’reoutofhisleague,”Ellietellsme.
“Youdo?”
“Of course we do. You’re amazing, and we just aren’t sure that he is. Especially since he’s a

suspect.”

I sit down on the step I’m on, and sigh. “He is, Isa. He’s amazing. I know he’s a suspect, and I

promiseI’lltakehimdownifit’shim.ButIalreadytoldyouI’mfallingforhim,andhe’sfallingfor
me.”

“Didhetellyouthat,ordoyoujustthinkthat.I’msorrytoask,butIkindofhaveto.”
“Yes,Reina.Hetoldme.Infrontoftheguysdownstairs,even.Healsoshowedme.Lastnightand

alldaytoday.AndI’mnotjusttalkingaboutthesex,although,thatwasbeyondawesome.Hecooked
breakfastforme,andthenwemadelunchanddinnertogether.Weplayedsomeofmyvideogames
and watched movies. We also talked. About everything. Well, not everything, since I can’t tell him
aboutthemission,butalmosteverything.Andhejusttoldmethathewantsmetobehisgirlfriend.”

“Allthatandhehaskillerabs?Damngirl.Youknowallthistechnologyandstuff.Isthereawayto

makemeone?”

“I’m not a scientist, so the best I could maybe do would be a computer generated one who just

talkedtoyou.”

“Well,hell.That’snofun.Butyou,ontheotherhand,soundlikeyou’rehavingenoughfunforthe

bothofus.”

“Iam.”
“Just be careful. We’ll all be here to pick up the pieces if it goes wrong, but you need to be

preparedincaseheistheonedoingthesabotaging.Orheendsupactinglikethestupidjerkeveryone
thinksheis.”

“Iknow,Reina.Thanksforcomingovereveryone,butIreallyneedtogotosleep.Ihavetobeat

thestadiumearlyforthegame.”

There are only two more pre-season games before the start of the regular season. I’m expecting

thingstogetworsenowthatit’ssoclose.IneedtorestsoIcankeepmyheadinthegame.Ican’trisk
missingsomethingbecauseI’mtiredorbecauseI’minlove.

***

Zack

I walk into the locker room and all conversation stops. “What’s up guys?” I know what’s up, but

I’mnotgoingtobetheonetosayit.It’sreallynoone’sbusiness.

“YouandAinsley?Really?Ithoughtshewassmarterthanthat.”
“Thisisyourfirstgameback.Isuggestyoushutyourmouth,Donaldson,ifyouwanttoactually

makeitouttothefield.”

“Idon’tneedtosayanything,anyway.You’llscrewthisupallonyourown.”
I shake my head and turn back to my locker to get changed. The problem is, I’m afraid that he’s

right.EventhoughI’m110%committedtobeingwithAinsley,I’mprobablygoingtoscrewthisup.It
won’tbebycheatingonher,whichIknowiswhathe’sinsinuating.There’snowayinhellI’deverdo
that.Nottoher.ButI’mstillafraidI’lldosomethingelseIshouldn’t.I’lljusthavetotryreallyhard
notto.

I get dressed quickly and prepare for the game. I smile when I hear Ainsley’s knock at the door.

Coachtellshershecancomein,andwhenshedoes,myheartalmoststops.She’swearingmyjersey
over a pair of leggings. Damn if that’s not the hottest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. Coach isn’t
impressedwithwhatshe’swearing,though.

“Iknowyoutwoaregoingsteadynow,butIneedyoupayingattentiontotheotherguysoutthere

todaytoo,Ainsley.”

“Yes.Ofcourse.Doyouwantmetochange?”

“No.”Theword’soutofmymouthbeforeIcaneventhinkaboutit.
“Ibelieveshewasaskingme.”
“Oh.Sorry,Coach.”
“Youdon’thavetochange.Itrustyoutotellalltheseassholesexactlywhattheydowrongtoday.”
“Andwhattheydoright.”
“Sure.Thattoo.”
“I’ll see all of you out there,” she says as she looks at me and smiles before leaving the locker

room.

The game is going the way we wanted it to. It’s the third quarter, and I’ve just made our fourth

touchdown. I run to the sidelines, throw off my helmet, and grab Ainsley for a kiss. I know the
camerasandeveryoneinthestadiumarewatchingme.Idon’tgiveafuck.Wellactually,Ido.Iwant
peopletoknowshe’smine.AndI’mhers.

“We’reprobablygoingtofineyouforthat,youknow.”
The team has strict guidelines written into our contracts. We can be fined for anything deemed a

distraction from the game. They’re really serious about making a good impression, and proving
we’reaseriousteam.

“Yep,”ItellCoachandthenturnbacktomygirl.“Itwasworththefine.”
“Yesitwas.”
Weendedupwinning35-31,soitwascloserthanwewould’veliked.Ainsleygoesovereverything

withus,andtruetoherword,shereallywaswatchingallofus.Donaldsonpracticallytakesherhead
offwhenshetellshimwhatshesaw.BeforeIcanpunchhim,thecoachestellhimshe’sright,andthat
heneedstobackoff.I’mprettysuresomeofthatwasformybenefit,butI’mgladtheydiditallthe
same.

I’mholdingAinsley’shandwhenwewalkoutofthelockerroom.Asweheadtotheoutsidedoor,

myagentstopsme.“Zack,weneedtotalkaboutthetrade.”

“Itoldyou,Inolongerwanttobetraded,Dex.”
“Listen,Iknowyouthinkyouwanttostayforher.Butchickscomeandgo.Youknowthatmore

thananyone.You’llmoveonbynextweekandregretnotatleastexploringyouroptions.”

“I know we’ve been friends for years, man, but don’t ever disrespect Ainsley again. She’s

importanttome.Iwillnothesitatetokickyourassnexttime.”

“I’msorry,Ainsley.Ishouldn’thavesaidthatinfrontofyou.”
“Youshouldn’thavesaidthatatall.Whatthehelliswrongwithyou?”
“Talktohim,Zack.I’llmeetyoubackatmyplace.”
“Yousure?Icantalktohimanotherday.”
“Yes,I’msure.Heflewouttoseeyou.”
“Giveusaminute,Dex,”ItellhimasIpullheralittlewaysdownthehall.“Iwon’tbelong,babe.

Canyoupleasekeepthejerseyon?”

“Take as long as you need. Of course I’ll leave it on if you want. I was a little worried about

wearingit.Iknowotherwomenwearthemallthetime.”

“Theywearmyjerseytotryandimpressme,butitonlymakesthemlookdesperate.Youworeitto

supportme,anditmakesyoulooklikethehottestwomanontheplanet.Thankyou.Imeanit.”

“You’rewelcome.Thanksforincurringthatfinetokissme.”
“Ijustgotawarningthistime,butI’mdoingitateverygameyou’reonthesidelinesfor.”
“You’llgetfinedeverytimeifyouwerealreadywarned.”
“WillyouletmemoveinwithyouwhenIrunoutofmoney?”
“Maybe.”

“I’mgoingtoturnthatmaybeintoayestonight.IbettergotakecareofDex,soIcangetbackto

youfaster.”

“Okay.DoIgetyourmouthforafewminutesfirst?”
“Ohyeah.”
Ileandownandbrushherlipswithmine.It’snotenoughforher.Shegrabsthecollarofmyshirtto

pullmeagainsther.Ismileagainstherlipsasshecrushesthemintomine.We’rebrokenapartbythe
soundofDexclearinghisthroat.

“I’llseeyousoon,Zack.”
“Very soon,” I tell her as I kiss her knuckles. She smiles at me and walks away. I watch her go.

“Alright,man.Let’sgetthisoverwith.”

CHAPTER9

Ainsley

Since I’m not sure how long Zack will be meeting with Dex, I decide that ordering in probably

won’twork.Istopatthegrocerystoretopickupsomechicken.Ihaveafreezerfullofgreatmeat,but
since I didn’t plan on cooking, it’s of no use to me tonight. I grab a couple of other things I know
he’lllikeandthendrivetomyapartment.Isayhitotheguardsinthelobby,andridetheelevatorto
myfloor.

I’dliketosayI’msurprisedwhenIgetofftheelevatorandseemyapartmentdoorisopen,butI’m

not.IshakemyheadasIwalkin.“Youguysarefast,I’llgiveyouthat.”

“Whatthehellhappened?Inearlyburstintoflameswhenthathotmanofyourskissedyouafterhis

touchdown. He claimed you in front of the whole world. I was expecting some elevator action, at
least.”Stellafansherselftoemphasizeherwords.

“Iwould’veshutofftheelevatorcamerasifIwasgoingtogetanyactioninthere.AsforZack,his

agentshowedupandinsistedonmeeting.He’llbehereassoonashe’sdone.”

“You’recookinghimdinner?”
“Nothing compared to your work, Faith. Just some chicken and veggies,” I tell her as I drop the

bagsonthecounterandstarttakingthingsout.

“Listen girls, I need to talk to Ainsley. Alone,” Reina says. They all grumble a little, but file out.

Whenthey’regone,shewalksintothekitchenandleansagainstthecounterasIstartcooking.“Ithink
youknowwhatI’mgoingtotellyou.”

I place my hands on the counter and hang my head. “Because of the publicity from the ball, and

nowthegame,I’llneverbeabletogoundercoveragain.Iunderstandifyou’refiringme,Reina.”

“Firingyou?Never.Butyes,youwon’tbeabletogooutonmissionsafterthisone.”
“Thesamethingwould’vehappenedifI’dfollowedtheplananddatedKevin.Wewould’vebeen

photographed.”

“Therewasachanceofit,yes.Butfromwhatwecantell,hewould’vekeptthingsdiscreetifyou’d

asked.AndIdon’tthinkyouwould’vefallenforhim.”

“IknowI’vescrewedup,okay?”ItellherasIfeeltearsforminginmyeyes.
I love my job, but if I can’t go on any missions, ever, I shouldn’t be an agent. They should find

someonetoreplacemeandjustmakemeapartofthatperson’steam.Reinaputsherarmsaroundme
andhugsmetight.

“Youdidn’tscrewup.Youfellinlove.Weallwanttofindagreatguytobewith.Doesitsuckthatit

happenedonamission?Letalone,withaguywho’sasuspect?Yes,itdoes.ButJaneandIagreethat
you are valuable to us as both an employee, and as part of our family. Besides, we all know how
talentedStellais.Youshouldbefineforshort-termassignmentsifshedisguisesyou.Yourplacewith
usissecure.”

“You’resure?”IaskasIpullawaytolookather.
“Yes.Weneedyou,Ainsley.Andweloveyou.”
“Iloveyou,too.”

“Nowthatthisisallsettled,I’llleaveyoutoyourcookingandyourman.”
“I’mnotsurewhenhe’llbehere,butthanks.”
There’s a knock at my door and I look over to Reina, who shrugs. “I saw him on the security

monitor.I’lllethiminonmywayout.”

Shekissesmycheekandwalkstothedoor.Whensheopensit,Zackgrabsher.“Icouldn’twai—oh

shit,you’renotAinsley.I’msosorry.Ididn’tknowshehadcompany.”Heimmediatelyletshergo
andstepsaway.

“It’sfine,Zack.I’mReina.”Sheholdsoutherhand,andtheyshake.“Wesaweachotherattheball,

butit’snicetoofficiallymeetyou.”

“Yeah,youtoo.”HestilllooksembarrassedandIfallalittlemoreinlovewithhim.
“I’llseeyoulater,Ainsley.”
“Bye.”Sheclosesthedoorbehindher,andIsmileatZack.“Areyougoingtocomeoverhereand

grabmenow?”

“Areyoumakingfunofme?”heasksashewalkstome.
“No.I’mlovingthatyou’realwaysyourselfwithme.Andmyfriends.”
“Honestyisimportanttome,Ains.Probablythemostimportantthing.You’realwayshonestwith

me,sowhywouldn’tIbehonestwhenI’mwithyou?”

MyheartsinksbecauseI’mnotbeinghonestwithhim,butI’vebeentrainedwellenoughtokeepa

smileonmyfaceasIanswerhim.“I’msogladtohaveyouinmylife.”

“Thefeelingismutual.”
Hecupsmycheekswithhishandsandkissesmesweetly.Iwrapmyarmsaroundhisbacktopull

him close. When we break apart, we continue holding onto each other for another few moments. It
feelsnicetohughim.

“Ishouldprobablyfinishdinner.”
“Ithoughtyouwereorderingin.”
“Iwasgoingto,butIdidn’tknowhowlongyourmeetingwouldtake.”Iturnaroundandputthe

veggiesinapantocook.ThenIstartpreppingthechickenfortheoven.

“Toolong.Letmehelp.”
“No. You grab a beer and sit on the couch. You played a hard game. Actually, if you want, my

bathtubdoublesasaJacuzzi.YoucansoakwhileIcookifyou’dlike.”

“Iwashopingwe’dsoaktogether.”
“Ifwegetinthattubtogether,noneofyourmuscleswillberelaxing.”
“True.Very,verytrue.Youdon’tmindifIsoak?IreallyfeellikeIshouldhelpyou,butI’malsoa

littlesore.”

“Go,”ItellhimasIswathisbuttthistime.
“Yes,boss,”hetellsmeasheleansovertokissmebeforeheadingupthestairs.
I finish dinner and carry our plate upstairs. Zack left the bathroom door open, which makes it

easierformetosneakin.Hehashiseyesclosedandheadphonesin,asthewaterswirlsaroundhis
gloriousbody.Iquietlysettheplatedownandtakeapicwithmycellphone.It’sjustforme,andnot
goinganywherenearaCloud,butIhadtohaveit.

IdragthelittlestepstoolIhaveovertothesideofthetubandperchtherewithourfood.Idon’t

want to scare Zack, so I lean over and lightly brush my lips over his. He smiles and takes his
headphonesoutbeforeopeninghiseyes.

“Hi.”
“Hi.Youbroughtthefoodtome?”
“Yeah.IfiguredyoucouldsoakalittlelongerifIfedyou.”
“You’regoingtofeedme?”

“Yes…Imean…ifthat’sokay…ifyouwantmeto.Isthattooweird?”
“Whyareyounervous,babe?Wenotonlyhadsexalloverthisapartmentyesterday,butyouknow

you’reoneofthebestfriendsI’veeverhadinmylife.Inadditiontobeingmyfirstrealgirlfriend.”

“AllofthosereasonsarewhyI’mnervous.I’veneverhadsexlikethat,andwhileI’mprettysure

you enjoyed it, I’m still nervous that I did something wrong. I would never want to lose our
friendship because I love just spending time talking to you. And you have to remember, you’re my
firstboyfriend.Idon’tknowwhatI’msupposedtodotokeepyou.”

He’soutofthetubandkneelinginfrontofmebeforeIcansayanythingelse.Hegrabstheplate

frommyhandanduseshislongarmtoplaceitbythesink.Hetakesmyhandsinhisandlooksmein
the eye. “Enjoyed it? Yesterday was hands down the best sex I’ve ever had. Nothing I’ve ever done
with another woman has come close. I’m pretty sure it’s because I never cared for anyone else the
wayIcareforyou.Fuck,I’mjustgoingtosayit.Iloveyou,Ainsley.There’snomorefallinggoing
on.I’malreadythere.Nothingyoucouldeverdowouldbewrong.Iloveeverythingyoudo.Notto
mention,Ifinditallincrediblyhot.BringingmethefoodyoucookedwhileI’msoakingmymuscles
inyourbathtub?Hot.Fivealarmfirehot,babe.

“I don’t ever want to lose our friendship either. I have so much fun with you, even when you’re

calling me on my bullshit. I feel like I can talk to you about anything, and you’ll react honestly.
DonaldsontoldmetodaythatI’mgoingtoscrewthingsupwithyou.I’msoscaredthathe’sright.I
still don’t know what someone so brilliant, sexy, and beautiful would want with a reformed man-
whorewhocan’tstophimselffromflirting.”

“We’llbothhavetotryourbestnottoscrewup.AndsinceIwastheonewhoreformedtheman-

whore, I’m not letting him go. Flirting is okay. I know you have to do it. And that it’s just in your
naturetobecharming.You’vestoppedsigningandtouchingwomen’sbreasts,andIappreciatethat.
I’vealsoseenyoumovehandsoffyourasslately.”

“Ionlywanttocharmyou.Andtouchyour magnificent breasts. My ass is owned, so no one else

shouldhavetheirhandsonit.”

“Owned,huh?”
“Youownallofme,Ains.I’myoursforaslongasyou’llhaveme.”
“Foreverworks.IsthereanythingIcando,though?Ireallywanttoknowifthere’ssomethingyou

wantfromme.”

“ThereissomethingIwant.Butithastocomefromyouwhenyou’reready.Ifyou’reready.”
“Whatisit?”
“Justthreelittlewords.”
“OhmyGod—Ididn’tsayitback,didI?Iloveyou,Zack.Ido.Iloveyou.”
“That’sarelief.”
“Wereyoureallyworried?”
“Honestly?Yeah,alittle.I’vebeenanassformuchofourfriendship.”
“Butyou’vebeenwonderfulsinceyoubecamemyboyfriend.”
“Almost24hours.Thathastobearecord.”
“Nowthatthisisallsettled,youshouldgetbackintheJacuzzi.”
“Justaslongasyourealizethatyou’regoingtobejoiningmeinthere.”
“Withthejerseystillon,right?”
“Ohyeah.Thejerseymaygetmovedaround,butit’sdefinitelystayingontonight.”

***

Zack

I wake up to a pillow whacking me over the head. “What the fuck?” I grab Ainsley and roll her

over,pinninghertothebedbeneathme.

“Itriedwakingyouupnicely,butitdidn’twork.Wehavetogettothestadium!”
“Wellmaybeifsomesexygoddesshadn’tfuckedmeintoanearcomaafewhoursago,I’dbeable

togetupontime.”

“Thisismyfault?IfIremembercorrectly,ourlasttimeoccurredwhileyouhadmebentoverthe

bed.”

“Youwerebuckingintome.ItmademesocrazyIcouldn’tthinkstraight.”
“YougoingtotellCoachthat’swhywe’relate?”
“Hellno.I’mgoingtokeepmymouthshutandrunmylaps.”
“Goodanswer.Nowhurryupandshower.”
Wewalkintothemedicalareaofthestadiumahalfhourlater,andCoachimmediatelystormsover

tous.“You’relate.Thisbetternotbecomeahabit,”heyellsasheglaresatAinsley.

“Don’t look at her. She was whacking me over the head with a pillow, trying to wake me up on

time.”

“Wellmaybeifshe’dkeptherlegsclosedlastnight,you’dbeontimeforyourcheck-up.”
AinsleygaspsasIgrabhimbytheshirtandgetinhisface.“Idon’tcarewhoyouare.Ifyouever

talkaboutherlikethatagain,I’llendyou.”

“I’d fire him before it came to that. Apologize to her,” Jack Rivers says to him, looking like he

wantstogetinhisface,too.

“Areyoukidding?”Coachasks.
“No.I’mdeadserious.WhatyoujustsaidisconsideredsexualharassmentandAinsleycouldsueus

forit.Puttingthataside,sheisavaluablememberofmystaffanddeservesrespect.Iwon’tstandfor
youspeakingtoherlikethat.”

“Damnlaws.Amancan’tbeamananymore.”
“Thatwasn’tanapology.”
“I’mnotgivingone.Shecansueme,andyoucansuspendme.Butsheshouldn’tbeworkinghere

whenallshewantsistofuckourstarplayers.”

Istarttomove,butAinsleygrabsmyarm.“Igotthis,Zack.”SheturnstoCoach.“I’mherebecause

Jackaskedmetohelpyou.IknowI’vehelpedthisteam.Iamnothereto‘fuck’theplayers.I’mwith
Zackforthemanheis,andnottheplayer.”

“Playeristherightwordforhim.”
“At least he has some play, Kevin. And he treats me with respect. You talked to me like I was an

idiotwhenwemet,whichiswhywedidn’tevenmakeittoonedate.”

Hearing Ainsley defend herself and me is hot. Really hot. I like that she doesn’t need me to take

careofher.Although,Idefinitelycanandwouldifitcamedowntoit.I’mprettysuresheknowsthat.

“Gohome,Jim.You’resuspendedfortheweek,unlessyouapologizetoAinsley.”
“Thisteamisajoke,anyway.I’mnotapologizing.Seehowyoudowithoutaheadcoach.”
“Thisteamhaswoneverypre-seasongamesofar,andtherestofthecoachingstaffcanstepup.

You’renotirreplaceable.”

“Goodluckwiththat.”IseehimsharealookwithDonaldsonashestormsout.
“Theshow’sovereveryone.Getyourphysicalsandenjoyyourdaysoff.I’llseeyouallbackhere

onWednesday.Ainsley,canIspeaktoyouforafewminutes?”

“Sure.”Sheturnstome.“I’llseeyouafteryourphysical.”
Inod.“I’vegotlapsafter.IfIdon’tseeyoubythen,I’llhangoutinthelobby.”
“Thanks.”ShesmilesatmebeforewalkingoutwithJack.

Ipassmypost-gamephysical,andheadtotheindoortrack.I’vedoneonelap,whenAinsleyjogs

ontothetracknexttome.“What’reyoudoing,babe?”

“Runningwithyou.Itwaspartiallymyfaultthatyouwerelate.Plus,Ithoughtitwouldbecoolto

workouttogethertoday.Ifyouwant.”

“Actually,Ireallywantedtogosolotoday.Ijustneedtoclearmyhead.I’msorry,butIjustreally

needtobealonerightnow.”

“Oh.Imean,sure,yeah.”
ShestopsrunningandIfeellikeshitasIkeepgoing.ButIreallydoneedsometimetothink.Over

thepastfewdays,I’vemadedecisionstochangewhereIwanttolivemylifeandwhoIwanttoliveit
with.Dexputsomethoughtsinmyhead,andwhileIblockedthemoutlastnight,whathappenedthis
morningbroughtthemallbacktothefrontofmymind.ShouldIreallybemakingallmydecisions
basedonwhatAinsleywants?WhyamItheonlyonesacrificing?Iloveher,butifshelovesmetoo,
sheshouldbeofferingtomakechangesaswell.

Idon’thavetimetothinkaboutitfurtherasthegroundrumblesbeneathme,andthetrackstartsto

crumble in front of me. I manage to jump to the side as the area I was running on crumbles away.
Whatthefuck?Ilookoverthesideoncethegroundstopsshaking,andseethattheweightroomhas
beendestroyedbytherubblefromthetrackcollapsingaboveit.IhopetoGodthatnoonewasdown
there.

“Zack,” Ainsley yells as she comes through the door to the track with Donaldson, Jack, and the

stadiumsecurity.“OhmyGod.You’reokay.”

“Iam.Ijumpedoutoftheway.”
“That’sreallylucky.Idon’tknowthatIcould’vedonethatifI’dbeentakenbysurprise.”
“IguessIhavebetterreflexesthanyou,Donaldson.”Iturntosecurity.“Whatthehellhappened?”
“There was a small explosion. Luckily no one was in the weight room. You were alone up here,

right?”

“Yeah.Iwantedtorunalone.”
IlookovertoAinsley,andshehasaweirdlookonherface.Icanonlydescribeitassuspicious,but

thatcan’tberight.I’llaskheraboutitlater.

Policearriveacoupleminuteslaterandseparateeveryonesotheycanaskuswhathappenedand

whatwemight’veseen.I’mprettysuremyinterviewstakethelongest.IexpecttoseeAinsleywaiting
formewhenIgetdone,butshe’snotinthelobby.Iaskthereceptionistifshe’sseenher,andshetells
me that my girl got a ride home from one of her friends. What the fuck? I really don’t need this
drama on top of almost getting killed today. This is why I don’t do more than sleep with women. I
havemoretothinkaboutnowthanIdidearlier,soIheadhometocallmysister.

CHAPTER10

Ainsley

IcalledFaithtopickmeupfromthestadium.IneedtotalktoReinaandJane,andIalsodidn’twant

to see Zack. It hurt me when he told me he didn’t want me with him. And getting me off the track
beforetheexplosionnowmakeshimlookevenguiltier.

“Okay.Zackgotyouoffthetrackbeforetheexplosion.Andhewantedofftheteamuntilthetwoof

yougottogether.Buthemetwithhisagentafterthegameyesterday,whichcouldmeanhechanged
hismind.Didheactanydifferentlywithyoulastnight?”

“No.Notatall.”
“I have to say this, Ainsley. I’m sorry, but could he be playing you? I know you haven’t broken

cover, but could he just be using you to try and prove that he doesn’t want to be traded while he
sabotagestheteam?”

“I don’t know, Reina. It all feels so real. But I’ve never had a boyfriend before, so I could’ve

missedthingsbecauseIdon’tknowwhattoexpect.”

“Ihopeit’sreal.Ido.Butwehavetolookateverything.”
“Iknow.That’swhyI’mhere.I’mnotkeepinganythingfromyou.”
“We know that, dear. You wouldn’t protect him if he was guilty. It’s not in your nature. You also

wouldn’tlietous.Youwouldn’tbehereifwedidn’ttrustyou.It’sZackTaylorthatwe’renotsureof.
Ifheisjustusingyou,I’llunleashthegirlsonhim.ButIhopeyou’reright,andhelovesyoulikeyou
obviouslylovehim.”

“Idolovehim,Jane.I’msosorry.Ididn’texpectthis.”
“Youcan’tcontrollove.Andyoushouldneverbesorryaboutit.ImeantwhatIsaid,though.Ifthis

youngmanisplayingwithyouremotions,he’llbeverysorry.”

“Yes,hewill.Wewouldn’tevenhavetoorderit.Thegirlswouldtakecareofhimontheirown.I’d

takecareofhim.”Reina’seyesflash,andIknowshemeansit.

“Iappreciateallofyoulookingoutforme.Ifhemeantwhathesaidaboutjustneedingspace,I’ll

giveittohim.Iwon’tinitiatecontact,ifthat’sokay.”

“Ofcourse.Youneedtoprotectyourself,andweneedtoseewhathe’supto.”
I check in with my tech team. They’re all on track and keeping things running while I’m

undercover. Once I’m done, I head home. I stop at the gate to tell them not to let Zack in without
callingme.It’stimetostartprotectingmyself.

***

Zack

TwodayswithoutAinsleyhasmademecrazy,yetitalsohelpedmethinkclearly.Thefactthatshe

didn’t reach out to me is making me realize that I shouldn’t make life decisions based entirely on
someoneelse.I’mnotreadytolookintoatradeagainyetbecausewiththeexceptionofDonaldson,I

really like the guys on the team. And Jack and Lindsey Rivers are great to work for. Even without
Ainsley,thismaybetheplaceforme.

She’sonthefieldwhenIwalkoutforpractice.She’stalkingwiththecoaches,andwhiletheygreet

me,sheignoresme.Itrytocatchhereyeafewmoretimesoverthenextfewhours,butshewon’t
lookatme.Fuckit.I’mnotgoingtocontinuetolooklikeanidiotandchaseafterher.

Whenpracticeisover,Iheadtothestandstogreetthefans.I’mbacktotheoldZackTaylor,kissing

cheeksandsigningtits.Idon’tgrabany,butIdoletthewomengrabme.I’lladmitthatitdoesn’tfeel
right,butIplayalong.UntilIlookoverandseetearsrunningdownAinsley’sfaceassherunsforthe
tunnel.

Iextricatemyselffromthefansandgoafterher.She’salmosttotheoutsidedoorswhenIcatchher

and grab her arm. She spins towards me and punches me in the jaw. I jerk back from the impact.
Damn,sheknowshowtothrowapunch.

“Whatthefuckwasthatfor?”
“Seriously?Youclaimyoulovemeandthenyougooutthereactinglikeyouusedto.”
“Youclaimyouloveme,andyetyoudidn’tcallmeatalltheselasttwodays.Iwasalmostkilled

andyoudon’tseemtocare.”

“Youtoldmeyouwantedtobealone.Yousentmeaway.Iwasgivingyouthespaceyouwanted.”
“Ijusthadthingstothinkabout.Ididn’tmeanthatIwantedtobeawayfromyoufortwodays.”
“You should’ve called me, then. Not let those women climb all over you and grab your ass. So

muchforbeingowned,huh?”

“I’mtryingtofigurethisout,justlikeyouare.”
“Yeah,well,atleastIknowenoughnottobekissingothermenorlettingthemputtheirhandson

me.”

Just the thought of those things makes me want to kill someone. And cry. Shit! I’ve screwed up.

Again.Butthistimeisreallybad.ItoldherIloveherandthenactedlikeitwasalie.Weshould’ve
calledeachother,yeah.We’rebothwrongthere.ButIwenttoofartoday.

“I’msorry.Youdidn’tcall,andthenyouwouldn’tevenlookatme.Iwashurt.Ithoughtyoudidn’t

reallycare.ButIknowthat’snoexcuseforwhatjusthappenedoutthere.”

“No.It’snot.”
“HowcanImakeituptoyou?”
“Idon’tknow,Zack.”
“CanIbuyyoulunch?”
“No.”
Fuck.Thisisbad.Wealwayshavelunchtogetherafterpractice.“CanIsitatthesametablewithyou

whileyoubuyyourownlunch?”

Shesighsbeforeanswering.“Yes.I’llbeatBlueberryHill.”
“I’llgoshowerandseeyouthere.”
Irushthroughmyshowerandgetdressedquickly,leavingmyhaircompletelyuntouched.It’snot

mylooksthatI’mgoingtoneedtoconvinceAinsleytogivemeanotherchance.She’snotthatgirl.I
needtoshowherthatshematters.Ihaveanidea,andIhopeitworks.

IdrivetotherestaurantasfastasIcanwithoutgettingpulledover.WhenIwalkin,Iseeherseated

atabooth.IwanttoslideinnexttoherlikeIusuallydo,butIknowIhavetoearnthatrightagain.Or
not.ShelooksupsetthatIdidn’tsitwithher.

Thewaitresscomesoverandtakesmyorder,thenItellAinsleyhowIfeel.“Iwantedtositnextto

you,butIdidn’tthinkyou’dwantmeto.IthoughtIhadtoprovemyselfagain.”

“Idon’twantyouto‘proveyourself’Zack.IjustwantyoutobethemanIthinkyouare.Theone

who cares about me. I need to know that the things you said to me were real, and you weren’t just

playingmetogetmetosleepwithyou.”

Shelooksdown,andIfeellikeanevenbiggerass.Ididthis.Imadeherdoubtme.Doubtus.Ireach

overthetableandtiltherchinbackup.

“Iloveyou,Ainsley.Ihaveneversaidthattoanotherwomanotherthanmysister.Idon’ttakethose

wordslightly.IhatethatI’vemadeyoudoubtme.I’veneverliedtoyou.Iactedlikeanasstoday,and
I’m afraid that I’ll probably be stupid again. I’m terrified and sometimes that makes me do idiotic
things.Idon’twanttoloseyou.”

“Whydidyousendmeawayonthetrack?”
“Honestly?”Idon’twanttokeepfightingwithher,butIguessweneedtogetthisalloutnow.
“Well,Idon’twantyoutolie.”
“Dexsaidsomethingstome,andthenwithwhathappenedinthelockerroom…well,Ijustwanted

tothinkaboutsomethings.”

“Thingslikeme?”
“Yes.I’mgivingupeverythingIthoughtIwantedinordertostayhereinLasVegas.”
“You’rechangingyourmind?”
“No.ButIcan’thelpbutwonderabouthowcommittedyouaretome.Imean,IsaidI’dstayforyou

andyousaidyouwouldn’tgoforme.”

“I-Ican’tleave,Zack.”
“Becauseyouhavefriendshere.IhaveasisterintheplaceIwanttogo.Whyistherenoroomfor

compromiseonyourpart?”

“It’scomplicated.”
“I’mbaringmysoultoyou.Whycan’tyoudothesame?Ithoughtyouweredifferentbecauseyou

didn’t want the star, but I think you’re worse. You want everything from me, but won’t give me
anythinginreturn.”

“I’mgivingyoume.That’snotenough?”
“Ifitwasthewholeyou,itwouldbe.Butyou’reonlyofferingmeapartofyourself.I’mnotsureif

Icandealwithonlyhavingthatlittlebit.Ithoughtitwouldbeenough,butsittinghereacrossfrom
you,IrealizethatalthoughI’manasshole,IdeserveeverythingfromthewomanIlove.Believeitor
not,you’retheonewhoshowedmethat.”

“Youdodeserveeverything.”
“Butyouwon’tgiveittome,willyou?”
“Ican’t,Zack.Iloveyousomuch.Pleaseletthatbeenough.”
“Idon’tknow.Ineedtothinkaboutthis.Aboutus.Thisisn’ttheend.Ipromiseyouthat.Ijustneed

alittlemoretimetothink.Canyougivemethat?”

“Yes.Idoloveyou.”
“Iknow.Iloveyou,too.I’llcallyousoon,okay?”
Shenods,andItakeoutmywalletandthrowdownsomemoneyonthetable.ThenIslideoutofthe

boothandwalkoutofthediner.ImeanwhatIsaid.Thingsaren’toverwithher.Ilovehertoomuch
forthat.ButIdoneedtimetocometotermswitheverything.

***

Ainsley

I let Zack walk away four days ago, and I’ve barely made it out of bed since. I couldn’t tell him

everything,so there wasno reason totry and stop him.He was right.He deserves everything from
me.Ican’tgiveittohim,soIshouldstepaside.Ican’tthough.Ilovehimtoomuch.

I went to the game today because I needed to do my job. I called in sick to the team the last few

days,whilethegirlstookturnssittingwithme.ButIoweittoeveryonetoseethismissionthrough.

Itwastorture,Zackwouldn’tlookatme.Healsoignoredmeinthelockerroom.Iknowhe’sgoing

toignoremetonightattheparty,butthatdoesn’tmeanI’mgoingtohide.GaryandMaggieGriffin
are hosting a party to celebrate the end of the pre-season, and I’m going to do what I can to make
Zacknoticeme.

Stellafoundmeakillerdress.It’sablackhalterdressmadeofchiffon.It’sbacklessandthefront

dropsintoadeepV.Thechiffonpiecesfallindifferentlengths,coveringalmosteverything.Onthe
sides,there’sonlyonelayeroffabrictomyhip.I’vegotonstrappyheelsandmyhairandmakeup
areflawless.Ifhereallydoesn’twantme,I’llbackoff.ButI’mnotgoingdownwithoutafight.

IwalkintothebackyardandsmileasIseemyfriends.Faithplannedthemenu,soshe’splayingthe

part of the attentive caterer. Audrey and Isabelle are Maggie’s girls, so they always attend Griffin
functions,whileJadeandDarcyarejustmingling.JaneandReinaarehereofcourse,asisMatt.My
smilefadesasIseeZack.

He’s flanked by the women who always gravitate to him at these parties, only this time he’s not

pushingthemaway.He’slaughingandflirtingwiththem.Hesaidweweren’tover,butitlookslike
he’s moved on already. I should’ve known that he didn’t mean it. He just said that to stop me from
causingascene.

Mystepsfalter,andIwould’vefallenifZanedidn’tgrabmyarm.Hismom,Helen,isoneofthe

Societyleaders.“Thanks.”

“He’sanass.”
“Ilovehim.”
“He’sstillanass.”
“Icouldn’ttellhimthetruthaboutwhyIwon’tleaveLasVegas.”
“You’veonlyknownhimamonth.Heshouldbefinewithyoutellinghimalittleatatime.Would

hehavebeenyourone?Themanyoutold?”

“Yes.”
“LikeIsaid,ass.Anyguywouldbeluckytohaveanypartofyou,Ainsley.Andyoudeservebetter

thanthat.”

IlookoverandZack’ssmirkingatmeasthewomenrubhisarms,kisshischeeks,andwhisperin

hisear.IfliphimoffandgrabAidenashewalksby,swingingaroundtokisshim.HeisoneofMatt’s
ex-militaryfriends,whoalsoworksforCorrigan&Co.Icatchhimoffguard,butheplaysalong.

“Thanks,”IwhispertohimasIpullawayfromhim.
“Iflookscouldkill,I’dbedead.”
“Hestarteditwiththosewomen.”
“I’mhotterthanthem,though.”
“True.Youarealittletooprettytohavebeeninthemilitary.”
“Lookscanbedeceiving,LittleMouse.ImaynotlookasscaryasMatt,butI’mjustasdeadly.”
“Ineverdoubtedthat.”
Hekissesmeoncemoreonthecheekandthenstepsaway.“I’mgoingtorunalongnow,sinceI’m

notinthemoodforafighttonight.”

I don’t understand what he means until I smell Zack behind me. The perfume on him can’t fully

disguisethescentthatisuniquelyhis.Idon’tturnaround.Iwon’tblinkfirst.

“Whatwasthat,Ains?”
“Itwasakiss.Ithinkyou’refamiliarwiththeconcept.”
“Youjustkissrandomguysnow?Ithought—Imean,Itoldyou…”

I hear the barely controlled anger in his voice. And the hurt. He can fuck off, though. He has no

righttoactlikehewaswronged.Hewasbaitingmewiththosewomen.Ijuststruckbackharder.

“Youjustmadeitveryclearthatit’snoneofyourbusiness.”
“Thefuckit’snotmybusiness.Youaremine.”
Iturnthen.“No,Zack,I’mnot.IfIwasyours,youwould’vekissedmeafteryourtouchdowntoday,

andwewould’vewalkedinheretogether.IwantedtobeyoursmorethanI’veeverwantedanythingin
mylife.Butyoudon’treallywantme.Ifyoudid,you’dtakewhatIcangiveyou,knowingthatI’lltell
youallmysecretswhenIcan.Andyouwouldn’thavethrownthosewomeninmyface.Yousaidwe
weren’tover,andI’veheldontohopethelastfewdayswhileIcriedmyselftosleepeverynight.But
you just made sure I knew that there isn’t hope for us. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some
minglingtodo.”

“Itwasnothing.They’renothingtome.Iwasn’tgoingtodoanythingwiththem.”
“Have you noticed how often you say those words to me? It’s gotten old, fast. And just for the

record,Aiden’snot‘nothing’tome.”

Iwalkawaybeforehecanrespond.ImanagetosmileasIwalkthroughthecrowd.Itisn’tuntilI’m

safelyinoneoftheguestroomsthatIletmyselffallapart.Thedooropens,andAudreyrushesin.She
grabsmeinherarmsandholdsmetight.

“We’llkillthebastard.They’llneverfindallthepiecesofhimwhenwe’redone.”
“No.Idon’twanthimhurt.Atleastnotphysically.”
“He’snotgettingawaywithdoingthistoyou.”
“I just want to forget him. Forget how it felt to have him hold me, kiss me, and…oh God. Why?

WhydidIfallinlove,Audrey?Iknowbetter.IknowI’mnotgoodenough.”

“Not good enough? Chica, you are better than most people I’ve met in my life. As for falling in

love,it’snotsomethingyoucanhelp.”

“Howhaveyoudoneit?You’vebeendoingmissionsforalmosttenyears.”
“I just haven’t found the ‘one’ I guess. I’ve dated lots of guys. And I even thought I was in love

once. Not with a mission guy, it was someone I went to school with. But it didn’t work out, and I
haven’tbeen‘wowed’byanyonesince.Iwon’tsettleforanythinglessthanreallove.”

“Ithoughtthiswasreal.”
“Iknow.We’reallhereforyou.”
“Thanks.I’mgoingtowashup,andthenIneedtogobackoutthere.Ican’tlethimwin.”
“That’smygirl.I’llseeyouinafewminutes.”

***

Zack

It’s a couple of hours later, and I’m drowning my sorrows at one of the bars. Alone. I shouldn’t

haveflirtedwiththosechicks,orletthemputtheirmouthsonme.IknewitbeforeIdidit.Iknewit
whenIwasdoingit.AndIdamnwellknewitwhenAinsleykissedthatguy.Whoapparently‘means
somethingtoher.’Goingallcavemanonherafterthefactwasjusttheicingonthecake.Becausethat
wastherightcourseofactionafterflirtingwithotherwomentotryandmakeherjealousenoughto
spill her secrets. At least she didn’t include her tongue in that kiss. There has to be a silver lining
somewhereinallofthis.

“Youplayedagoodgame,Taylor.”
I turn to see Scott Griffin standing next to me. He’s a tech genius and, from what I hear, a pretty

coolguy.He’scoveredintatsandhasacoupleofpiercings,butthesneerthat’scurrentlyonhisface

makeshimlookevenmorebad-ass.Whyishesneeringatmeaftergivingmeacompliment?

“Thanks.”
“Toobadthegameyou’replayingwithAinsleyismajorlyfuckedup.Wecould’vebeenfriends,

butnowyou’vefallenfirmlyintoenemyterritory.”

“Whatdoesmyrelationshipwithherhavetodowithyou?”
“AinsleyandIhavebeenfriendssincecollege.She’slikeasistertome.”
“Oh,Isee.You’reoneoftheguyswhodidn’tnoticeherincollege.”
“Newsflash—weallnoticedher.Wejustknewweweren’tgoodenoughforhersowemadesureto

become good friends instead. You should’ve known you weren’t good enough either, before you
chosetofuckwithher.Becausenowyou’veacquiredsomeenemiesIcanguaranteeyoudon’twant.
I’dwishyouluck,butsinceI’mgoingtoenjoydestroyingyou,Idon’tthinkthatwouldbeverypolite
ofme.”

“You’rethreateningme?”
“No.I’mjustgivingyoutheonlywarningyou’regoingtoget.I’dsleepwithoneeyeopenifIwere

you.”

“That’senough,Scott.”
“He’snotgettingawaywiththis,Ainsley.”
“Icanhandlehimonmyown.Gobewithyourbeautifulwifeandbaby.”
Shehugshimandkisseshischeek.Hewalksaway,butnotwithoutglaringatme.IturntoAinsley

andseethatshe’sbeencrying.Myheartsinksevenfurther.

“I’lldomybesttogetmyfriendstoleaveyoualone.They’reveryprotectiveofme.”
“I’venoticed.Ihavetoadmitthathavingatechgeniusthreatentodestroymeismorethanalittle

scary. It trumps anything that could happen on the field. That I can handle. I don’t know what to do
againstScottGriffin.”

“Ifhedoesn’tlistentome,I’llundoanythinghedoestoyou.”
“Youcandothat?”
“Yes.Ican.”
“Whyaren’tyouworkingforhim?Orsomeothercompany?”
“Ilovefootball.”
I know that’s not the whole answer. I have a decision to make. Do I keep pushing her and

demandingthatshetellmemore?OrdoItakewhatIcangetwithher,whichishonestlymorethanI
everthoughtI’dhavewithanyone?I’mnotalwaysanidiot,soI’lloptforoptionnumbertwo.

“IsthereanychancethatIcouldstillhavethepartofyouyou’rewillingtogivetome?”
“Ican’tkeepgoingthroughthis,Zack.TherearethingsImayneverbeabletotellyou.Ineedto

knowyoucanacceptthat.Andnotrunofftootherwomen.Evenifyou’reonlydoingittohurtme.
BecauseIdon’twanttokeepbeinghurt.”

“Idon’twanttohurtyou.AlthoughImaynotactlikeit,that’sthelastthingIwanttodo.Willyou

bemygirlfriendagain?”

“Whataboutyourfriendsoverthere?”ShenodstowardsthechicksIwaswithwhenshewalkedin.

TheireyesareshootingdaggersatAinsley.

“They’renotmyfriends.AndI’llneverletthemwithintenfeetofmeagain.Iswearit.”
“We’ve never been on a date, Zack. Plan a date for us, and if I like it, then maybe I’ll be your

girlfriendagain.You’regoingtohavetoputoutaneffortsoIknowyou’rereallyinvestedintrying
tomakethiswork.”

“Icandothat.Ialreadyhaveanothersurpriseforyou,butI’llplananamazingdateforyou.”
“I’lllookforwardtoit.Goodnight,Zack.”
“CanIkissyoubeforeyouleave?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. You embarrassed me, and kissing you after that would be even

moreembarrassing.”

Damnit.“Whataboutyou?Yousaidthatguymeanssomethingtoyou.”
“He’safriend.Hewasdoingmeafavorbyplayingalong.”
“Youhavealotofinterestingandunexpectedfriends.”
“Youhavenoidea.”
“Ineedtohavemymouthonyou,Ains.Pleaseletmekissyou.Youlooksohotinthisdress,Ican

barelystandit,”ItellherasIreachoutandfingerthematerialatherhip.

“PeoplewillthinkI’mjustlikethemifIletyoukissme,Zack.”
“NotaftertheyseethewayIkissyou.”
Shelooksintomyeyesforaminuteandnods.Ileanforwardtocuphercheekwithmyhand.Ikiss

herothercheekandthenplacelittlekissesalloverherface.WhenIgettohermouth,Ikissandnibble
at every inch of it. I have my other hand on her back and I feel her skin heating as I worship her
mouth. When I lick across her lips, she opens for me on a moan. I don’t attack her like I want to,
though.Icontinuetakingitslowuntilshegrabsthejacketofmytuxandpullsmetoher,attackingmy
mouth.

Shepullsbackafteracoupleofminutes,andIhughertight.“Sorryaboutthat.Iknowyouwere

takingitslowforme.”

“I’mnotcomplaining.”
“DoesitmakemeweakifIwantyoutoaskmetogohomewithyou?”
Ileanbackandlookherintheeye.“Youwanttogohomewithme?”
Shenods.“Yes,butIfeellikeIshouldn’t.Wearen’tevenofficiallybacktogetheryet.”
“Howaboutyoucomeover,andwemakeoutforalittlewhile.Ifyoustillfeelweirdabouttakingit

further,youcansleepinoneoftheguestrooms.”

“Thatsoundsreallygood.I’llgohomeandchange.Justgivemeyouraddress,andI’llmeetyouat

yourplace.”

“No.”
“No?Youjustsaidyes.”
“Imeant,nodon’tchange.Please.Iwantmyhandsinsidethisdress.”
“Theshoes,too?”sheasksmewithatwinkleinhereyes,motioningtoherstrappyheels.Fuckme

heelsindeed.

“Ohyeah,thosedefinitelyneedtostayon.”
“Ihadafeelingyou’dsaythat.”
“Youknowmesowell.”
Sheturnsserious.“Iwantto,Zack.”
“Youknowmebetterthananyone,babe.ExceptSierra,ofcourse.”
Shemumblessomethingthatsoundslike“Ihopeso.”BeforeIcanaskheraboutit,shekissesmy

cheek and walks away. I watch her say goodbye to everyone, as I leave. I’ve never been one for
goodbyes.

CHAPTER11

Ainsley

I’m parked in Zach’s driveway, trying to will myself to do something. I just can’t decide if that

somethingshouldbegoinginsideorleaving.Mostofthegirlsvotedformeleaving,ornotcoming
hereatall.Tegan,Jade,andStellatoldmetojustcomeandusehimforhisbody.AsifIcouldkeep
myemotionsoutofit.Ilovethem,butIcan’tdetachliketheydo.Maybeit’sagoodthingthatIwon’t
beabletodoafullmissionagain.Ifunctionmuchbetterbehindacomputerscreen.

Aknockonmywindowstartlesme.IlookovertoseeZacksmilingatmefromtheothersideof

thedoor.Hemakesamotionformetorolldownmywindow.Ido,bitingmylipasIlookathim.His
tux is still on, minus the tie. He’s also untucked his shirt and unbuttoned a few of the buttons. Holy
hotness.

“Tryingtodecideifyouwanttocomeinside?”
“Yeah.I’msorry.”
“Don’tbe.I’llgobackinthereandleaveyoutoit.There’snopressure,Ains.Outhere,orwhen

yougetinthere.Ihopeyouknowthataboutme.”

“I do.” How could I not? He’s never pressured me. Yeah, he wanted me to get on my knees and

actedlikeanasswhenIwouldn’t,butthatwasafterI’dtoldhimIwantedtobewithhim.

“Seeyousoon,ornot.Eitherway,I’vegotourdatefortomorrowplanned.”
“Already?”
“Youinspireme.”
Hestartstowalkaway,butIcallouttohim.“Wait.I’mcominginside.”
“Whyyesyouare,”hesayswithasmirk,takingmywordsinadifferentwaythanIintended.
“Wipethatsmirkoffyourface,orI’llbetheonlyonecoming.”
“No you won’t. I’ll just jerk myself off like I’ve been doing the last few nights, thinking about

you.”

Iwalkuptohimandrunahandoverhisshirt.“Ifthat’sanacceptablesubstituteforme,thenbyall

meanskeepupthecockyassholeattitude.”

He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. I’ve rendered him speechless. Never thought that

wouldhappen,butIhavetoadmitthatI’malittleproudofmyself.Heshakeshishead,andwhenhe
speaks,IrealizeIjustlostthisroundafterall.

“No person or thing could ever be an acceptable substitute for you. Let’s go inside so I can

romanceyouandmakeyoucomeallnight.”

Heholdsmyhandashewalksmeinside.Itakeinthebeautifularchitectureofhishouse,butnotice

there’salmostnothinginhere.Hereallydidintendtoleave.Thelivingroomhasalargecouchthat
wouldbewideenoughtosleeponcomfortably,afewtables,andaTV.Hetugsmetothecouch,andI
sitnexttohim.

We kiss for over an hour. Just kissing, but it’s so hot I think I may implode. It’s a mix of little

kisses,hotpassionatekisses,andmeltmypantiestonguekisses.

WhenZackpushesthepiecesofmyhaltertopaside,I’mmorethanreadytotakethingsfurther.

“Fuck.Iloveyourtits.Butwhatarethese?”
He’stalkingaboutthelittlenipplecoversStellagaveme.“They’resonoonecouldseemynipples

hardenwhenIwasnearyou.”

“Yournipplesgethardwhenyou’renearme?”heasksashepullsthecoversoff.“Oh,Iguessthey

do.ApartofmegetshardwhenI’mnearyou,too.Butmine’salotharder.”

Soit’sacompetitionthen,huh?Icanplay,too.“Igetwet,too.”
Hiseyesflashandthenhissmirkisback.“SodoI.”
“Seriously?Yougetwet?”
HetakesoffhispantsandboxerbriefssoIcanseethepre-cumglisteningatthetopofhisperfect

cock.“Yeah,baby,I’mwet.”

Ican’tresist.BeforeIcaneventhinkaboutwhatI’mdoing,Ileanoverandlickitoff.“Yum.”
I’minstantlyonmyback,andhe’sgothismouthonme,suckinganippleintoit.Insteadofplaying

withtheotherone,hisfreehandpushesthematerialofmydressupandplungestwofingersintome.
HeliftshisheadtolookatmeasIarchmyback.“You’vebeenwithoutpantiesallnight?”

Inod,andnowI’mtheonesmirking.“IwashopingIwouldn’tneedthem.”
“Youdon’t.”
Hecontinueslavishingattentiononmybreastsasheworkshisfingersinandout.I’mclose.Really

close, and he can feel it. He releases my nipple with a pop and moves down my body. My dress is
around my waist as he watches his fingers pump in an out for a few seconds before his mouth
descendsonme.

He’slickingandsuckingme,andmyhandsmovetomybreasts.They’rewetfromhismouthand

tongue,andIcan’thelpbutplaywiththem.IneverknewIcouldbesobold.NeitherdidZack.Hiseyes
widenwhenhelooksupatme.ThenIfeelhimsmileagainstmyclitasherampsuphisefforts.The
triple sensations have me going over in a matter of seconds. “Zack!” I scream as I come hard,
buckingagainsthismouthandfingers.

Hedoesn’tstop,though.HesloweddownasIcame,buthestartspumpinghisfingersandworking

meoverwithhismouthagain.“IneedatleastonemorebeforeI’minsideyou,Ains.Playwithyour
titsagainforme.IwanttowatchyouwhileIlickyou.”

OhGod.Yes,Iwantthattoo.Ican’tsayitthough.I’velostallabilitytospeakasIhelphimbring

me over again. It’s even more intense the second time. He kisses the inside of my thighs for a few
minutesasIwrithebeneathhim.

“Please,Zack.Ineedyou.”
“I’vegotyou.Ijustneedtograbacondom.”
“Noyoudon’t.I’mcleanandonthepill.Iknowyou’reclean,too.”
He stiffens. “I don’t do that. Birth control isn’t one hundred percent. Even if it was, what if you

forgot?”

NowI’mtheonefreezing.“Forgot?Youmeanonpurpose.Iseeitinyoureyes.YoureallythinkI’d

trytotrapyouwithababy?”

“I’vegottoprotectmyself.”
“Fuckyou,Zack.Oractually,don’t.”
IpushhimawayfrommeasIgetup.IpullmytopbackovermybreastsasIheadforthedoor.I

don’tmakeitthere,though.

“Wait.Don’tgo,”Zacksaysashegetsinfrontofme.“I’msorry.Iknowyouwouldn’tdothat.”
“You’resayingthewords,butIcanstillseeinyoureyesthatyouareworried.”
He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before opening them again. “I’m trying, Ains. Really

tryingtogetpastmyfears.Iknowyouwouldn’tevertrytotrapme.I’msorryIreactedthewayIdid.
Canwejustgobacktothecouchandstartagain?Evenatthebeginningwithjustthekissing?”

“Ijustwanttogotosleep.”
HepicksupmybagfromwhereI’dleftitinthefoyerwhenwewalkedinearlier.“Youdon’tneed

todrivehometodothat.I’llshowyoutotheguestroom.”

Ifollowhimupthestairs.Hestopsatthefirstdoorontherightandopensit.Iseeapretty,feminine

room.“ThisisSierra’sroom?”

“Yes.It’stheonlyroombesidesminethathasfurnitureinit.I’mattheendofthehallifyouneed

me.”

“Iwon’t,butthanks,”ItellhimasIsqueezebyhimandintotheroom.Iturnandholdoutmyhand

for my bag. He hands it to me and I close the door on him. I won’t pretend that he didn’t hurt me
downstairs.Thatwouldn’tbefairtoeitheroneofus.

***

Zack

Damnit.Ijustcan’tstopopeningmyfuckingmouthandsayingthewrongthings.IknowAinsley

wouldnevertrytotrapme,butIsaiditanyway.AndnowI’minbedalone.Insteadofbeingbarefor
thefirsttimeinmylifeinsideofthewomanIlove.“Dumbass”doesn’tevenbegintodescribeme.

I need to talk to someone so I dial Sierra’s number. It’s late, but I know she’ll answer for me. It

ringsaboutfifteentimesbeforeshedoes,though.“What’swrong,Zack?”sheaskssoundingoutof
breath.

“Areyouokay?Yousoundoutofbreath.”
“Iwasbusy.Butyouwouldn’tcallthislateunlessit’sanemergency,soIhadtoanswer.”
“Busy?You’rewithaguy?DoesheknowwhoIamandwhatIwoulddotohimifhehurtyou?”
“Didyoucalltodiscussmysexcapades,orbecauseyouactuallyneededsomething?”
“Iscrewedupagain.”
“WithAinsley?”
“Yeah.”
“SomethingelsesinceItalkedtoyouafterthegame?”
“Yep.”
“Seriously?”Idon’tanswerher.“Goahead.Hitmewithit.”
“Iprettymuchaccusedheroftryingtotrapmebygettingpregnant.”
“What?She’spregnant?”
“No.She’snotpregnant.Shesaidshewasonthepillandclean,sowedidn’tneedacondom.”
“Andyouaccusedherofwantingtotrapyou?Areyouinsane?Hersayingthatmeantshetrusted

you.”

“IthinkIaminsane.Iknowwhatitmeant,butIfuckedupandnowIjustdon’tknowhowtofixit.”
“I’mguessingsheleftandsaidsheneverwantedtotalktoyouagain.”
“No.She’sactuallyinmyguestroom.I’msuresheplanstoleavefirstthinginthemorning.”
“Thenyouneedtomakeherwanttostay.”
“Igotherofftwicebeforewefought.Ifthat’snotenough,Idon’tknowwhatis.”
“Youneedtostopthinkingwithyourdick.Sheneedsmorethansex.Wowher.”
“How?”
“Youneedtofigurethatout.AndIneedtogobacktomydate.Talktoyousoon.”
Ihangup,andthinkabouthowtowowAinsley.WhateverI’mgoingtodoisgoingtohavetocome

fromthishouse.WhichmeansIdon’thavemuchtoworkwith.ButifIleave,withmyluck,she’llgo
homethesecondIstepoutside.

Iwalkaround,andwhenI’minmylivingroom,ithitsme.IknowwhatIcando.Shehastowalk

pastthisroomtoleave,soshewon’tbeabletomissit.Iruntomyhomeofficetogetstarted.WhenI
headtomybedroomhourslater,IthinkImayactuallyhaveachance.

***

Ainsley

Itossedandturnedmostofthenight.KnowingthatZack’ssoclosewaskillingme.Iwasn’tgoing

togivein,though.Ineedhimtotrustme.IknowIhaven’tbeentotallyhonestwithhim,butinevery
waythatmattersI’vetoldhimthetruth.

NowI’msittingonthisbedtryingtofigureoutwhattodo.IknowIshouldleave,butitfeelslikeit

reallywillbetheendifIdothat.Idon’twantittobetheend.Iwantustoworkthisout.I’mjustata
lossastohowtomakethathappen.Maybewejustneedsomemorespace.

Igetdressedandwalkoutintothehall.IcansmellbreakfastandhearZackcooking.Ishecooking

forme?Ialmostfeelbadenoughtodetourtothekitchen.Almost.Ikeepwalkingandnearlyfallover
whenIseewhat’sonthewalloverthefireplaceinthelivingroom.

Where it was blank yesterday, today there’s a giant collage with words, binary code, and me. It

takesmeaminutetodecodethegroupofbinarycodeinmyhead.Thebiggroupinthemiddlesays
“you’reeveryminuteofmyeveryday”andthenthere’s“love,”“beautiful,”“brilliant,”and“sexy,”in
both binary and English. The pictures of me are mostly from the games and parties. Some feature
Zack and me when we’re kissing or dancing. He must’ve gotten them from press sites. There are
someselfieswetooktogether,andInoticehealsotooksomecovertpicsofmeaswell.IsmileasI
seeheputsomeclipartpicsofcomputersallaround.ThenI’mcrying.Happytearsthistime.It’sthe
mostbeautifulthingI’veeverseen,andhandsdownthemostwonderfulthinganyone’severdonefor
me.

“Youdon’tlikeit?Fuck.Ithoughtyou’dlikeit.”
“IloveitZack,”ItellhimasIlaunchmyselfintohisarms.“Thankyou.”
“Iloveyou,Ains.IwantedyoutoknowthatIrealizehowmuchIkeepscrewingup,butyoudoown

myheartevenifitmaynotseemlikeitsometimes.”

“Justyourheartnow,huh?”IteasehimasIrunmyhandsoverhisbarechest.
“No.Youstillownallofme.Ithoughtyou’dwanttohearaboutmyheartthemost.”
“I do. But I also like knowing I can have the rest of you anytime,” I tell him as I slide my hand

insidehisbriefstostrokehim.

Hesurprisesmebypullingmyhandoutandsteppingaway.“Notyet.Imean,wecanifyouwant.I

definitelywant.ButI’mtryingtowooyouhere,andImadebreakfast.Thenwehaveourdate.”

“I smelled breakfast. You can feed me first, but I’m going to need at least a quickie before our

date.”

“Quickie?Seriously.HaveIeverbeenquickwithyou?”
“No.Butyoucandoit.Youcanevencomewithoutme.Icametwicelastnight,youjusthadyour

hand.”

“Let’seatbeforeallmyfoodgoestowaste,littlevixen.”
Igetanidea,soIgoalongwiththiswholefoodthing.Vixenisright.Idon’tknowwhat’smademe

asboldasIplantobe,butI’mgoingwithit.Ilethimleadmeintothekitchen,whereIseetwoplates
withfoodonthetableinthelittlebreakfastnook.

“Whyaretheretwoplates?”
“Ididn’twanttoassume.”

Iwalkoverandscrapeallthefoodontooneplate.“Sit,please,”Isay,motioningtothebenchseat

alongthewall.

He smiles as he sits, and then his eyes darken as I push the table a little further away from him.

WhenIreachundermydressandpulloffmythong,Iseehisjawclench.

“What’reyoudoing,babe.”
“Havingaridewithmybreakfast,”ItellhimasIplacetheplatenexttohimandclimbontohislap.
“Fuck,thisisgoingtobehot.”
Ireachdownandfreehiscock.“That’stheplan.”IrealizeIdon’thaveacondom,soIstarttoget

offofhim.

“Whereareyougoing?”
“Iforgottograbacondom.”
“Ithoughtwedidn’tneedone.”
“Wedon’t,butonlyifyou’resure.”
“I’msure.”
IkisshimasIslidedownontohim,notstoppinguntilI’mseatedcomfortablyonhislap.Weboth

groan,butneitherofusmove.Ibreakthekisstograbapieceofbacon.Ifeedittohimonelittlepiece
atatime.IstarttoslowlymoveasIgrabaminipancake.Iholdituptohismouth,butheshakeshis
head.

“Ineedsyrup.”
“Iknow,”ItellhimasIgrabthebottle.
Iopenitandpoursomeonmyfingers.ThenIrubitovermylips.Hefinallytakeshisbiteandthen

licks my lips and fingers. I move a little faster on him, but not enough to get us done too fast. We
continueforseveralminutes,aswefeedeachotherbreakfast.Icanfeelmyselfstartingtobuildfrom
theslowtortureI’minflictingonbothofus.

“Youcanmovefaster,babe.Icanfeelthatyouneedit.Ineedit,too.Itfeelssodamngoodtobe

insideyouwithnothingbetweenus.”

I put down the fork I was holding and start to move faster as I place my hands on his shoulders.

Zacknuzzlesmyneck,whilewhisperingsexythingsinmyear.Whenhepushesmydressdownand
startspinchingmynipplesthroughmybra,Inearlyflyoffofhim.Hechuckles,kissingmehard.It’s
toomuchallatonce,andIgoovertheedgeasIscreamintohismouth.Hemoveshishandstomy
hips to hold me as he thrusts into me, taking an active part, now that I’ve found my release. A few
pumpslater,he’sshakingbeneathme.

“Wow,”Itellhimashewrapsmeinhisarms.
“More‘wow’thanusualiswhatIhopeyoumean.”
“Canyouputasidethecockyforaminute?”
“My‘cocky’isstillinsideyouandgettinghardagain.”
“Really?”
“Yes,really.Iknowyoucanfeelit.Butweshouldfinishbreakfast.”
Heliftsmeoffofhim,holdingmewithonearmashetuckshimselfbackintohisbriefs.Thenhe

turnsmesidewaysonhislapandpicksupourplate.Igetakissinbetweeneverybitehefeedsme.

“Thanksforspoilingmethismorning,Zack.”
“Youlikeitall?”
“Iloveit.”
“Iwantedtoshowyouhowmuchyoumeantome.Ididn’twantyoutoleave.”
“Ididn’twanttoleave,butIthoughtIhadto.”
He’squietforalmostaminute.“Thisisgood,right?Whatwehave,it’sgood?”
“Ithinkso.Iwantittobe.”

“Metoo.Iwantitmorethananything.Butisitreallysupposedtobethishard?Idon’twanttofight

allthetime.”

“Idon’twanttofighteither.IknowIreacttoofastsometimes,butIpromisetotryandtakeastep

backtolookatthesituationfirst.”

“AndI’mhappywiththepartofyouthatyoucangiveme.Ihopeonedayyoucantellmeallyour

secrets,butIloveyouenoughtowanttobewithyouregardless.Sinceyou’renotlyingtomeabout
anythingimportantit’sokayfornow.”

“You’llhavetotellmeallyoursecrets,too.”
“Youknoweverything.”
“Everysinglething?”
“Yes.IfyouthinkIhaven’ttoldyousomething,justask.I’lltellyouwhateveryouwanttoknow.”
Idecidetojustgoforit.“Whodoyouthinkistryingtosabotagetheteam?”
“I have no clue. I wish I did because I’d like to kick their ass. Well, maybe I’d thank them for

shockingDonaldsonsincehe’ssuchajerk,butIcould’vebeenkilled.AndifIhadn’tsentyouaway…
I can’t even think about anything happening to you. I just don’t know who would have anything to
gainbydestroyingtheteam.”

“Youcouldgoplayfortheteamyouwantifthere’snoteamhere.”
Hepracticallythrowsmeoffofhim.“YouthinkI’ddothisshit?Putpeopleindangerjusttoplay

somewhereelse?”

“Ihopenot.”
“Youhopenot?Areyoufuckingkiddingme?”
“I’msorry,Zack.Ijustneededtobesure.”
“Youshouldleave.”
“Youtoldmetoaskyouanything.”
He turns and places his hands on the kitchen island. I see him physically trying to calm himself

down.Iwait,wantinghimtosaywe’reokay,thathedoesn’twantmetoleave.Idon’tthinkwecan
surviveanotherbreak-up.Ifthat’sevenwhattheseare.Wehaven’tevenhadourdatetoday.

“Ididtellyouthat.Ididn’texpectyoutoaccusemeofsabotagingtheteam,butIsaidanything,soI

needtobeokaywiththis.”

“I’msorry.Ijusthadtoknow.”
“Nowyoudo.Imean,youdoknow,right?”
“Yes. I know you didn’t do those things.” And I do. He couldn’t fake his reaction. I’m not being

naïve,hewasreallyshocked.

“Okay.Let’sgogetcleanedupandthenwecanmeetinthelivingroomtogoonourdate.”
“Youdon’twanttocleanuptogether?”
“No.Ineedafewminutesalonerightnow.”
“Okay.”
Iturntogo,buthegrabsmeandpullsmetohim,huggingmetight.Iwrapmyarmsaroundhis

waistandholdhimback.“Iloveyou,Ains.”

“Iloveyou,too.”
“We’refine,okay?Ithinkthisagoodrelationshipthing.Beingmatureandtakingafewminutesto

calmdown.”

“Itprobablyis.I’llseeyouinafewminutes.”Hekissesthetopofmyheadandletsmego.

CHAPTER12

Zack

IhopeAinsleylikeswhatIhaveplannedforus.IchangeditupalittleafterthismorningbecauseI

thought of something perfect to do together. We can do everything I’d originally planned, after the
firststop.

Itgotalittlerockythismorning,butIthinkIhandleditprettywell.Iwasshockedandreallyangry

whenshefirstaskedmeaboutthesabotage.WhenIthoughtaboutit,though,IrealizedthatIdidlook
alittlesuspicious.Andthatit’sbetterthatsheaskedmeinsteadofcontinuingtowonderifIwasguilty.

IpullintoaparkinglotdowntownnearMainStreetandpaythelotguy.IopenAinsley’sdoorand

helpheroutofmySUV.“Ourdateisdownhere?”

“Partofit.”
“Okay.I’veheardtherearesomecoolplacestoeatdownhere.”
“Thereare.We’lleatinalittlewhile.”
Itakeherhandandleadhertothesidewalk.Istopinfrontofthefirstantiquestorewecometoand

starttoopenthedoorforus.“We’reantiqueshopping?”

“Iwashopingyou’dhelpmefindsomethingsformyplace.Iknowit’sprettybarren,soIwantto

makeitnicerforus.”

“I’dlovetohelpyou.Youwantantiques,though?”
“Notthefancystuff,butIthoughtwecouldfindafewcoolpiecesfromthe50’sor60’s.Thenwe

canfindadesignertotakeustotheinteriordesignbuildingoverthere.”Ipointbehindustothebig
WorldMarketCenter.

“ChloeGriffinisanawesomedesigner.Youshouldhireherifshehastime.”
“MaybeIwill.Let’sseewhatwecanfindintheshopsherefirst.”
Wefindsomeprettycoolstuffatthefirstcoupleofstores.It’sthethirdstorethatwegointothatwe

makeourbiggestpurchaseat.Wewanderseparatelyforafewminutes,andIfindAinsleyrunningher
hand along a very elaborate antique canopy bed. There are curved, gold bedposts and a padded
headboard.I’veneverthoughtofanantiquebedassexybefore,butthere’snootherwordforthisone.

“Youwantthisbed,babe?”
“It’ssobeautiful,romantic,and,well,sexy.Butyouhaveabedalready.”
“It’sjustabed.I’mnotattachedtoit.”Ileandownbecausethesalespersonishovering.“Thisoneis

sexy,andIcanjustimagineallthewaysIwouldtakeyouonit.I’mbuyingitforus.”

“Canwechangethepaddingfrompinktodarkpurple?”
“Whateveryouwant.Pinkisn’texactlymycolor.Purpleisn’teither,butIknowyouloveit,sowe

canmakethebedroompurple.”

“Really?”
“Yes,really.Iwantyoutothinkofmyhouseasyourstoo.”
“Maybewecanhaveahousewarmingpartywhenwe’redonedecoratingit.”
“Idon’tentertain,Ains.It’snotmything.It’sjustforus.”
“Oh.Okay.”

“Youreallywantaparty?”
“I’dliketohavemyfriendsoverandmaybesomeoftheguysfromtheteam.”
“Let’stalkaboutitagainwhenwe’redone,okay?”Idon’twantaparty.Atall.ButIdowantherto

behappy,soI’llconsiderit.

“Idon’twantyoutodosomethingyou’renotcomfortablewith.It’snotmyhouse,andyoudon’t

wantaparty.Soconsidertheconversationover.”

“Ijusttoldyouit’snowourhouse.Butthankyouforunderstanding.Yourfriendscancomeover

wheneveryouwant.”

Igiveheralittlekissandthenmotionthesalespersonover.Ibuythebedandsomematchingitems

theyalsohadforthebedroom.Iwasn’texpectingtohavearomanticbedroom,butit’sturningoutthat
way.AndIreallycan’twaittomakelovetoheronthatbed.

Wewalkbacktothecar,andthenIdriveustotheEastFremontarea.It’sgotsomegreatrestaurants

andbusinesses.IwanttotakehertolunchatCarsonKitchen.I’veheardthatthefoodanddrinksthere
are really good. I park close to the restaurant and take her hand again as we walk. I tell her where
we’rehavinglunch,andI’mhappythatshelikesthechoice.

“I’veheardthisplaceisgood.Iwantedtotryit.”
“So,mydateplanningisgoingwellsofar?”
“YoujustboughtthebedIliked.I’dsayit’sgoingverywell.”
“Thebedwasforbothofus.AndIlikedallthethingsyoupickedout.Thanksfordoingthatwith

me.”

“You’rewelcome.Ilikethatyouthoughtofsomethingdifferentforustodo.”
“I’vegotafewmoresurprises.”
“Good.”
Wegoinsideandhaveareallygoodlunch.IhavetheFriedGreenTomatosandwich,andshehas

theShortRibSliders.Weshareaplateofbakedmacandcheese.Theyhaveaniceselectionofbeers
andmixeddrinks.Itellherwe’vestillgotsomemorewalkingtodo,soweonlysticktooneeach.

IwalkusintotheContainerPark.Welookthroughtheshopswheresheletsmebuyherafewlittle

things,butnoteverythingIwant.“Zack,youcan’tjustbuymethings.I’mnotwiredthatway.”

“Iknow.I’veneverwantedtobuythingsforawomanbefore,andIdidn’treallyplanonittoday.

Well, I mean, I do have something here I ordered for you, but I wasn’t bringing you here to spend
money.Ijustthoughtitwouldbefun.Gettingyouthingsthatyoulikeisjustabonus.”

“Icanbuymyownthings,though.”
“Iknow.I’mnotdoingthistotryandshowoffmywealth.Ipromiseyouthat.”
“Youhavetoletmebuyyouthings,too.”
“Okay.Youcanbuymewhateveryouwant.”
I’mnotsurewhatshe’llfindforme,butthenwewalkintoashopthatrepurposesliquorbottlesinto

home decor and jewelry. They have some pretty cool stuff. Ainsley buys me an awesome lighting
thing—Iguessit’sakindofchandeliermadefrombottles—formyfoyerandsomeotherlightsand
décoritems.Shewon’tletmehearthetotal,butIknowit’shigh.Ilovedquiteafewthings.Ilikeit
though,havingherbuymethings.It’sprettyhot.

“Thankyou,Ains.Thosethingsaregoingtolooksocoolinthehouse.”
“You’rewelcome.Isawyoureyeslightupwhenwewalkedin.”
“Areyoureadyforyoursurprise?”IaskasIopenthedoortothechocolateshop.
“Yes.”
ItelltheemployeeatthefrontofthestorethatIhaveacustomordertopickup.Igivemynameand

shecomesbackwiththebox.IopenitandshowAinsleythepurplechocolatenecklaceandearrings
thatIorderedforher.Hermouthdropsopen.

“Thisischocolate?”
“Yeah.Doyoulikeit?”
“Iloveit.It’ssopretty.”
“Ithoughtyoucouldwearittodinnerlater.”
“I’llhavetofindsomethingtowearitwith,butIcan’twaittowearit,andeatit.Idogettoeatit,

right?”

“Yes.Ithinkthat’stheidea.CanIeatsome,too?”
Hercheeksheatasshetakesinmydoublemeaning.“Ithinkyouknowtheanswertothat.”
“Justchecking.”
WewalkoutoftheparkandIstopattheheartonthecorner.Ireachintomypocketandpullouta

lockwithapieceofpaperattachedtoit.“Youbroughtalockfortheheart?”

“Idid.”
ShetakesitfrommeandreadsthemessageIwrote:Zack&Ainsleyforever.
“Iloveit.Andit’strue.”
“Iknowit’sbasic,butI’mnotpoeticoranyshitlikethat.”
“It’sperfect.Let’sputiton.”
Wefindasmallspotandattachthelocktogether.Ikissherlightlyandthensteerusdownthestreet

alittlefurthertowhereQuinnWilsonhashershop.IsawhertalkingtoAinsleyattheGriffinparty,
andIthoughtherswouldbetheperfectplacetogetadressfortonight.

“We’regoingtoQuinn’sshop?”
“Well,youneedadress.”
“I’vebeenwantingoneofherdresses.Ialwayswearboringblackorjustsomethinglikethis.”She

motionstohershortbluedress,whichIthinkissmokinghot.

“There’snothingboringaboutyouinadress,babe.Orjeans.Prettymuchwhateveryouwearturns

meon.”

“Goodtoknow.”
Wewalkintotheshop,andQuinncomesrightovertous.“Hi,Ainsley.”
“HiQuinn.DoyouknowZack?”
“Wehaven’tmet,no.”
I hold out my hand. “Nice to meet you, Quinn.” She looks at my hand for a moment before

decidingtoshakeit.

“I’lldecideifIfeelthesameonceIknowwhatyourplanswithAinsleyare.”
“Quinn.”
“Hewasajerktoyou.I’mnotgoingtojustforgetthat.”
“Iwouldn’texpectyouto.I’mgoingtotrytonotbeajerkagain.”
“WhatcanIhelpyouwithtoday?”
“Ineedadressfordinner.Zackhadthischocolatenecklacemadeforme,soIwashopingtofind

somethingthatwouldmatchit.”

“You get points for that, Mr. Football,” she says when she sees the necklace. Then she turns to

Ainsley.“Ihavetheperfectdressforyou.Ihaven’tputitoutyet,solet’sgotothestockroom.”

AinsleyhandsmethenecklaceandkissesmebeforefollowingQuinn.Oncethey’reoutofsight,

I’mimmediatelyapproachedbyabrunettewithahugerack.“You’reZackTaylor.”

“Yes.Areyouafootballfan?”
“I’maZackfan.Youcanteachmesomeplaysanytime.Doyouwanttogetoutofhere?”
“I’mherewithmygirlfriend.”
“You didn’t kiss her on Sunday, and she wasn’t wearing your jersey. What kind of woman fights

withyou?”

“The kind I love. If you’d like me to sign something I can, but otherwise I’d like some privacy

please.”

“Ihavesomethingforyoutosign,”shesaysasshepushesherdressdown.
“No.”
“Whatdoyoumean,no?Menfalltotheirfeetwhentheyseemyboobs.”
“I’msuretheydo,butitwouldbedisrespectfultomygirlfriendifIsignedyouthere,sono.”
“Youneedtoleave.”
Ididn’tknowQuinnandAinsleywerebehindme,butIturnandseethembothwalkingtowardsus.

Ainsley’ssmilingatme.Quinnlookspissed.

“Youcan’tkickmeout.”
“SinceIownthisstore,Idefinitelycan.Putyourboobsawayandgetout.”
Thewomanstormsoffasmygirlwrapsherarmsaroundme.“Thankyouforturningherdown.”
“Youdon’thavetothankme.Ireallywanttobetheguyyoudeserve.”
“Youare.”Shegoesuponhertoes,andIleandownsoshecankissme.
“Doesthathappenoften?”Quinnasksaswebreakapart.
“Yes.”
“Damn.Imean,myhusbandgetshitonallthetimeinhistattooshop,butwhippingoutyourbreasts

inthemiddleofaclothingstoretakesittoawholenewlevel.”

“Youshouldseethewomenatthestadium,”Ainsleytellsher.
“It’s partly my fault. I used to encourage it. And even when we were fighting on Sunday, I went

alongwithit.”

“Evenifyouencouragedit,womenneedtohavesomeself-respect.Especiallywhenyoucamein

hereholdinghandswithAinsley.”

“That’swhyIsaidIwasonlypartlyatfault.”
“Keepturningdownthosewomenandwemightjustbefriends.Nowlet’stryonthisdress.Areyou

wearingitoutofhere?”

“Umm,Iguess.Idon’thaveshoes.”
“Imighthavehadsomedeliveredtoourroom.”
“Ourroom?”
“You’llsee.”
“I’mstartingtolikeyouevenmore,Zack.”
“Andyouusedmyname,Quinn.”
“ThatIdid.”
“Um,excuseme,butIhaveacomplaint.”
“What’swrong,Ains?”
“YoujustassumedthatI’dsleepwithyouagain?Imean,youbookedaroom.”
“Actually,Ihopedyou’dsleepwithme,butjustincaseyoudidn’t,Ibookedasuitewithacouch.

I’mhappytosleepthere…well,notexactlyhappy,butI’llsleepthereifyouwant.”

“Oh.Well,thanks.Ithinkyoucanmaybesleepinthebedwithme.Howdidyougetshoesforme?

Youdon’tknowmysize.”

“I’mgoingtotryreallyhardtoturnyourmaybeintoayes.Asfortheshoes,Icalledyourbuilding

andtheygotmeincontactwithyourfriend,Stella.Shepackedabagforyouandtookittothehotel.”

“Stella?”sheasksandthensharesalookwithQuinn.
“Yeah.Shesaidshewashappytohelp.”
“Which means I probably have the sluttiest lingerie imaginable along with a pair of heels I can’t

walkin.”

“Oryouhavenounderwearandtheheels,”Quinntellsher.

“Andthat’sbad?”
IgethitwiththedressinAinsley’shandasIlaugh.“Themaybejustgotalittlefirmer.”
“SodidI.”
“Zack!”
“What?Quinn’samarriedwoman.I’msureshehassex.”
“You’reimpossible.”
“Youwouldn’twantmeanyotherway.”
“Sadly,that’strue.”
“Youtwoaretoocute.Let’sgetthisdresstriedonsoyoucangotakecareofyourman,andhis

hardcock.”

“OhmyGod.IthoughtStellaandTeganwerebad,butyoutwo…”
“We’renotbad,we’rejustcomfortablewithoursexuality.You’llgetthereoneday.Ornot.I’lltone

itdownforyou,babe.”

“See?Cute.Totallycute,”QuinntellsAinsleyassheleadsherintothedressingroom.
Ishakemyhead.Whowould’veeverthoughtI’dbecalledcute.OrthatI’dlikeitsomuch.Ijust

needtoholdontoAinsleyandmylifewillkeepgettingbetterandbetter.

***

Ainsley

WejustpulleduptovaletattheDowntownGrandhotel.I’vepassedbyhereabunchoftimes,but

haveneverbeeninside.Todayhasbeensowonderful,andIcan’twaitfortherestofourdate.Ionly
askedforasingledate,butZack’scombinedawholeweek’sworthintothisoneday.Everythinghas
beenuniqueandfunsofar.EventhoughI’veinsistedonpayingforafewthings,he’sdefinitelybeen
spoiling me. Quinn conspired with him to have him pay for my dress before I could, and while I
pretendedtobemad,Iwasswooninginside.

Heholdsmyhandaswewalkinside.He’sdonethatallday,andit’sbeenmakingmefeellikethe

mostspecialwomanintheworld.Atleasttohim.

“What’reyousmilingabout?”
“IwasthinkingabouthowspecialI’vefeltalldaybeingwithyou.”
Hestopsandpullsmetohim.Rightthereinthemiddleofthebusylobby,hegivesmethesweetest,

sexiestkissI’veeverhad.It’slikeourotherkisses,butdifferent.Icanfeelhimpouringallhislove
intoit.

“You’resofuckingspecialtome,Ains.I’mjustgladIcouldmakeyoufeelittodaybecauseyou

makemefeelspecial,too.IloveyoumorethanIeverthoughtitcouldbepossibletolovesomeone,
andI’lldoeverythingIcantoshowyouthatforaslongasyou’llletme.”

“Iloveyou,too,andI’mgladImadeyoufeelgood.You’redefinitelywelcometosleepinthebed

withme.”

“ThankGod.”
I kiss him on the cheek and pull him over to the reception desk. We check in and head up to our

suite.It’sprettyawesome.Besidesthelivingroomwiththefamouscouch,there’salsoadiningroom,
andinthemiddleofthebedroomthereisasquareJacuzzitub.Isqueezemythighstogether,thinking
aboutwhatwedidinmyJacuzzitub.

“Wecandothatagain.”
“Huh?”

“I know you’re thinking about what we did in your tub. How I took you from behind while you

kneeleddownandbentovertheside.”

“Please.”
“Afterdinner,we’lldothatandwhateverelseyouwant,babe.”
“Now.Please.”
“Notinthetubyet,butI’llgetyouoffifyouneedmeto.Kneelonthecouchandholdontothe

back.”

Idoashesays,andfeelhimmovebehindme.Hereachesundermydressandtearsmythongoff.I

hearhiszippergodownandfeelhimatmyentranceafewsecondslater.Ileanbackintohim,letting
himknowI’mready.Henibblesonmyneckasheentersmeinonethrust.Inearlyscreamfromhow
gooditfeels.

“Zack.”
“Whatdoyouwant,babe?”
“Yourmouth…kiss…”
I’mbarelycoherent,butIcan’thelpit.Itfeelssogoodwhenhe’sinsideofme.Heleansdownand

takes my mouth. I feel myself building fast. He breaks the kiss, but holds my chin to the side as he
leansaroundme.

“Iwanttolookatyouwhenyoucome.Ilovetowatchyoufallapartforme.”
Heslideshisotherhandtothefrontofmeandrubsmyclit.Ihavetheurgetoclosemyeyes,butI

keepthemopenforhim.Iwanthimtoseeme.ItonlytakesanotherminutebeforeI’mcoming.I’m
notsurehowthickthewallsare,soIholdinmyscream.Zackcomesrightafterme.Hepullsoutand
turnsme,kissingmethoroughlybeforelettingmego.

“Thanks.”
“Youdon’teverhavetothankmeforthat.Ilovebeinginsideofyou.I’mgladyouaskedforit.I

likethatyoufeltcomfortableenoughwithmetotellmewhatyouneeded.”

“I’malittleembarrassedaboutthat,butnotasmuchasIthoughtI’dbe.”
“Youdon’thavetoask,youknow.Youcould’vejustdoneit—doneme—withoutasking.”
“Oh.Icanjustthrowyoudownandhavemywaywithyou?”
“Definitely.”
IneedtotellhimhowI’mfeeling.“Thankyou,Zack.Forlettingmestillbemeandnottryingto

changeme.I’mchangingalittlebecausemakinglovewithyouissogood,andIwantitallthetime,
butyou’renotaskingmetodoitforyou.”

“I’dneveraskyoutochange.”
“Iaskedyou,though.Youhadtochangetobewithme.IfeellikeI’mholdingyouback.”
“Fromotherwomenyoumean?”Inod.“Iwasn’tmewhenIwaswithotherwomen,Ains.Thatwas

justsex.Yes,youtoldmeithadtoonlybeyou,butIwantedthat.Ihavenodesiretobewithanother
woman.You’remorethanenough.”

“You’resure?”
“Yes.HowcouldIwantmore?I’vegotacrazysmart,awesomelybeautiful,andtotallyinsatiable

girlfriendwhowantsmycockallthetime.I’mprettymuchlivingeveryguy’sdream.”

“Well,you’renottheonlyone.Todayhasbeenamazing.You’regoodatthiswooingthing.”
“It’snotover.Let’sgetchangedsoIcantakeyoutodinner.”
Wecleanupandgetdressed.IfeellikeabombshellinthepurpledressQuinnhadforme.It’sgot

thickstrapsandhugsmybodyallthewaydowntothetopofmycalves.Stellapackedmetwopairof
shoes, not knowing what my dress would look like. I choose the silver strappy ones. I manage to
masteroneoftheup-dosthatIwastaught,alongwithsomemake-up,andthenputonmynecklaceand
earrings.

WhenIturnfromthemirrorandseeZackforthefirsttime,Inearlylosemybreath.He’sgotona

charcoalgraysuitwithadarkpurpleshirtandnotie.He’sleftacouplebuttonsundoneathisthroat,
andIhavetheurgetolickhimthere.Hishairisalittlemessy,whichmakeshimlookallthemorelike
awalkingadforsex.Butit’sthelookinhiseyesthattookmybreathaway.He’slookingatmelike
I’mhislastmealandhe’svery,veryhungry.

“Ithoughtweweregoingtodinner.”
“Weare.”
“Thenyouneedtostoplookingatmelikethat.”
“I’lltrytostopifyouwill.”
“Me?”
Heraisesaneyebrow,andIrealizehe’sright.I’vebeenundressinghimwithmyeyes.Iclosemy

eyes,takeadeepbreath,andwillmyselftoactnormal.WhenIopenmyeyes,he’sjustopeninghis,
too.Wesmileateachotherashewalksovertomeandtakesmyhand.

“Comeon,mylittlevixen.Let’seat.”
Zackleadsusdowntoarestaurantinthehotel,TripleGeorgeGrill.It’samazing.Ihavethecrab

stuffed shrimp, while he has a steak with bleu cheese. After, we go to Art Bar for drinks. I love
lookingatthepaintings,andthechocolateandcoconutdrinkIgetisdelicious.

Duringdinner,peoplestaredandwhispered,buttheyleftusalone.Hereatthebar,peoplecan’thelp

themselves.Theyapproachusconstantly.Zack’sfriendlywiththeguys,butfirmwiththewomen.He
signsnapkinsandtakesselfies,butifahandstartstowander,hestopsitimmediately.Healsoleans
overandkissesmefrequently,andhishandhasn’tleftmine.

I excuse myself to go the bathroom. I’m in the stall when I hear some women come in. They’re

talkingabouthowhotZackisandhowhe’llgetboredwithmesoon.I’msurprisedtofindthatI’mnot
botheredorworriedatall.Iknowwhatthey’resayingisn’ttrue.

“Ihatetodisappointyou,butI’mnotgoinganywhere,”ItellthemasIwalktothesink.
“You’renothotenoughtokeephim,”oneofthemtellsme.
“I’mprettysurehe’ddisagree.Haveagoodnight.”
I dry my hands and walk out with my head held high and a smirk on my lips. Zack looks at me

curiouslyasIreclaimmyseatonthebarstoolnexttohim.Ileanoverandkisshimwhenhe’sdone
withhislatestpic.

“Asmirk,andakiss?Whathappenedinthatbathroom?”
“Some girls were talking about how you’d get bored with me. Then they told me I wasn’t hot

enoughtoholdontoyou.Itoldthemyou’ddisagreeandwalkedout.”

Hiswholefacelightsupinthatspecialsmilethat’sallmine.“That’smygirl.”
“Excuseme,butweneedapicture.Canshemoveoutoftheway?”
Hissmilefadesasheturnstothewomenwhowereinthebathroomwithme.Hedoesn’tknowit’s

them,buthe’sobviouslyannoyedthattheyinterruptedus.“No.She’snotmoving,andI’mdonewith
picturesfortonight.”

“Seriously?Wejustfixedourmake-upandhairsowe’dlookperfectforyou.”
Realization dawns on his face, and he puts his arm around me, pulling me close. “My girl is the

onlyonewho’sperfectforme.NowrunalongbeforeIhavesecurityremoveyou.”

“You’reserious?Lookather.She’snotevensexy.”
Insteadofanswering,hemotionsfortheoneofthesecurityguysinthebar.“Canyoupleasemove

thesewomenalong?”

“Ofcourse,Mr.Taylor.”
“Wecanmoveourselves.Whatawaste.”
“Yeah.I’llnevergetthesefewminutesyouwastedback,”Itellthem.

Zacklaughsandkissesme.“Youreadytogobacktotheroom,babe?”
“Icouldbepersuaded.”
Heleansovertowhisperinmyear.“I’mgoingtolickyouuntilyouscreammynameandthenput

mycockinyouandfuckyouintoanotherorgasm.OnceI’mdone,Iwantyoutoridemehardbefore
ItakeyouintheJacuzzilikeIpromised.Afterallofthat,I’mgoingtocuddlewithyouasyoufall
asleepinmyarms.”

“I’mpersuaded.Let’sgo.”
Ijumpoffthebarstoolandpracticallyrunoutofthebar,draggingZackbehindme.He’sshaking

with laughter. Once we’re out of the crowd and back in the lobby, he swoops me into his arms and
carriesmetherestoftheway.

CHAPTER13

Zack

Ainsley and I did all the things I promised her we would. Instead of sleeping, though, we’re

cuddlingintheJacuzzirightnow.Ievenletherputsomebubblesin.Ireachforhernecklaceonthe
ledgeofthetub.

“Here,babe.YoutakeoneendandI’lltaketheotherlikeinthedogmovie.”
“LadyandtheTramp?”
“That’stheone.”
“It’sagoodthingyourfemalefanscan’tseeyounow.”
“Becausethey’dbehorrified?”
“Areyoukidding?They’dgoevencrazierforyouiftheyknewhowsweetandfunyouarewhen

we’realone.IftheysawyouthewayIdo,you’dneedextrasecurity.”

“There’snoneedtoworry.I’monlythiswaywithyou.Nooneelsewilleverseeit.”
“Areyoutryingtomakemeswoon?”
“No.I’mtryingtoeatsomechocolate.Grabyourend.”
Shelaughs,butcomplies.Weeacheatacoupleofthechocolate“jewels”beforeIdecidethatit’s

takingtoolongtogettohermouth.

“Fuckthis,”IsayasIthrowthenecklaceandjustkissher.
“Youalreadydid.Severaltimes.”
“IfIdidn’thavepracticeinthemorning,I’ddoitallseveralmoretimes.Weshouldgotosleep,

though.”

Istandandpullherupwithme.ThenIgrabthetowelsanddryheroffasthewaterdrains.When

we’rebothdry,Istepoutandliftherup,carryinghertothebed.

“Thanksformydateday,Zack.Itwasperfect.”
“I’mgladyoulikedit.DoIgettobeyourboyfriendagain?”
“Yes,please.I’mstillwaitingforthatjacketandring,butI’llsettleforyoufornow.”
“Soyoudon’twantthem?”IaskasIwalkovertomysuitcase.
“Youhavethem?Really?”
“Yes,really.”
Ipullthemoutofthesuitcaseandwalkbackovertoher.Hereyeslightupasshebouncesonthe

bed,holdingherhandsinfrontofher.Isitdownwiththejacketinmylapandtheringinmyhand.

“Thisismyhighschoolletterman’sjacketandmyclassring.IneverthoughtI’dhaveagirltogive

themtosinceIdidn’thaveahighschoolgirlfriend.They’reyoursifyoureallywantthem.”

“Ido.Iwantthem.”
Iplacetheringonherringfingeranddrapethejacketoverhershoulders.Sheputsherarmsinside

thesleevesandpullsitclosearoundher.Ipullhertome,andkissher.Seeingherinmyjacketiseven
betterthanseeingherinmyjersey.Wereallydoneedtogotosleep,though.SoItuckherin—jacket
andall—andthenclimbintobednexttoher.Iholdherinmyarmsaswebothfallasleep.

Morning comes too soon. Both of our alarms are going off as we groan. “I’ll order you some

breakfastwhileyoushower,Ains.”

“Thanks.”
Idrinkmyjuiceaftermyshower,andthenweheadout.Wegettothestadiumearly,soI’mableto

kiss her in the parking lot for a few minutes before we both head inside. We separate at the locker
roomdoor.

WhenIwalkoutontothefield,Ihavetosmileatseeingherstandingtherewearingmyjacket.It’s

reallytoohottobewearingit,butIwon’tcomplain.She’smineagain,andIlovethateveryonewill
knowit.

Practiceisrough,butgood.We’reallstokedaboutplayingourfirstregulargamethisweekend,so

weplayedhardduringpractice.Afterwards,Isignautographs.Isaynotobodypartsandstopanyone
from groping me. Ainsley waits for me to get done, and we hold hands as we walk back into the
tunnel.Shetellsusallwhatshesaw,andthenleavesustochange.

“Whereshouldwegotolunchtoday?”IaskherasIwalkoutofthelockerroom.
“Somewhereclosetoyourplaceifwecan.Ineedtogetmycar.”
“Youhaveahotdate?”
“Forlunch,yes.Afterthat,IpromisedtohangoutwithReinaandsomeofthegirlsforacoupleof

hours.”

“Oh.”
“Areyoumad?”
“Justdisappointed,Iguess.Iwantedtospendmoretimewithyou.”
“You’renotreallyaskingmetobeoneofthosegirlswhodropsherfriendstobewithherguyall

thetime,areyou?”

IsighbecauseIdon’twanttobethatguy.Sheshouldbeabletohangoutwithherfriends.“No.I

don’twantyoutodothat.”

“Good.BecauseIwouldn’t.”
“Iknow.”
We go to the Babystacks by my house. I draw out lunch as long as I can, kissing her in between

bites of my food. I know people are taking pics with their phones, but I really don’t care. I’m not
hidingAinsleyeveragain.

Iconvincehertomakeoutforalittlewhileagainsthercarbeforesheleavestomeetherfriends.

ShetellsmeIcancomeoverlaterifIwant.Idowantto,soItellhertocallmewhenshe’sdonewith
herafternoonplans.

***

Ainsley

ItoldZackthetruthaboutmeetingwithReinaandthegirls.We’rejustnothangingout.I’mhereat

theofficetotellthemaboutourconversationfromtheotherday.

“Youbelievehim?”Reinaasks.
“Yes.Iknowhim,andhewasn’tfakinghisshockatmeaccusinghimofbeingbehindthesabotage.”
“Youtwowerejustbrokenupacoupleofdaysago.Areyousureyoureally‘know’him?”
“He’sscaredofbeinginarelationship.He’sscaredofbeinginlovewithme.Butheneverliesto

me.Never.Iknowit,Faith.”

IwishElliewashere,butshe’sonamission.Oneofourrealmissions,savingsomeone.She’sthe

romanticamongus,soIknowshe’dsidewithme.Theothergirlsmeanwell,andIknowtheythink

they’rejustlookingoutforme,butitmakesthemsuspicious.

“You’restillleaningtowardsDonaldsonandsomeonefromthestaff?”Isabelleasks.
“IfeellikeKevinisinvolvedbecausehewasn’tstandinginthewaterwhenhegotshocked,andhe

triestocomeacrossastooperfect.AlthoughhisfaçadehasbeenslippinglatelywhenZackandIare
together.Hehadtohavesomeonehelphimsetthatup,though.Noonewasthereexceptforthestaff.”
Something’soffaboutwhatIsaid,butIfeellikeit’sjustoutofmyreach.Hopefullyit’llcometome
later.

“I’veresearchedbackwardsandforwardsandstill,nothing.Imethimatthestadiumtheotherday,

andhedoesn’tseemlikethebrightestbulbinthebox.Hehastohavesomeoneprettysmartworking
withhimifhe’sabletohidehismotives.”

“Ijustreallyfeelinmygutthathe’sinvolved,Teeg.”
“I want to hear more about how his façade is slipping. You’re right when you say he seems too

perfect.OnTV,andinperson.IfeltalittleslimywhenhewashittingonmeattheGriffin’sparty.It
wasjustweird.”Reinashiversalittlethinkingaboutit.

“HetoldZackthathewouldeventuallyscrewthingsupwithme.AndwhenIworeZack’sjerseyto

thatgame,hemadesomeremarkstobothofusaboutit.He’snottheniceguyhewantseveryoneto
thinkabout.Andifhemadeyoufeelweird,Rei,thenthat’snotgood.”

“Whowasweirdwithyou,Princess?”
We all turn to the door to see Matt standing there, looking like he’s ready to rip someone apart.

Why won’t he just admit how he feels about Reina? She hasn’t been hiding her feelings too well
lately,andthey’dbesogoodtogether.

“KevinDonaldson.Youknowthat,though,sinceyougotmeawayfromhimattheparty.”
“Hashetriedtogetintouchwithyousinceyouleftwithmethatnight?”
“Yes.He’scalledhereafewtimes.Alexdoesn’tputhimthrough.Healsosentflowerstoday.”
“Motherfucker.Ifhedoesn’tletupbeforethegamethisweekend,I’mgoingtohavesomewords

withhim.Noonemesseswithyou.”Herealizeswhathesaidandfreezes.“Withanyofyou.Noone
messeswithanyofyougirls.”

I’dalreadyturnedbacktoReinasoIseetheflashofhurtcrossherfacebeforeshehidesit.“Thanks

Matt,butIcanhandlemyself.Iappreciateyourhelpatthepartybecauseitwasgettingawkward,butI
don’tneedyourhelptogetridofsomeoverzealousidiot.”

They have a staring contest for a minute. Matt loses and turns on his heel, walking out without

another word. Reina collapses in her chair. No one knows what to do, so I ask them all to leave us
alone.We’reallclose,butsinceReinaandIarebothmentoredbyJane,wespendmoretimetogether,
andareclosertoeachotherthantoanyoneelse.

“Whenareyougoingtoadmitthatyou’reinlovewithMattandjustgoforit?”
“Iadmittedthatalongtimeago,anditpushedhimfartherawayfromme.He’schosentolivehis

life without any attachments. He thinks it’s all he can have after what he did and saw while in the
military.Iwanttobelievethatifheeverdidsettledown,itwouldbewithme.I’mnotnaïveenoughto
thinkthat’sgoingtobeanytimesoon.”

“Show him what he’s missing, Rei. You’re drop dead gorgeous, and smarter than all of us

combined.Plus,youhaveextremecompassionforthewomenwehelp,butalsoknowhowtotorture
anansweroutoftheevilpeoplewecomeintocontactwith.Whatguywouldn’twantyou?”

“Thanksforthat.AndIknowyouworry,soI’lltellyouonethingandonethingonly.Itcannever

leavethisroom.”

“Letmeshutoffthevideoandsoundinhere.”Ipulloutmyworktabletandgetthattakencareof

beforeturningbacktoher.“We’regood.”

“Hedoeswantme,Ainsley.Wereallydidleavethepartytogether.”

“Youmean…youandMatt…wow!”
“It’s not the first time, and it won’t be the last. But that’s all I get, a random hookup every few

months.It’spasttimeformetomoveon.NotwithKevinDonaldson,butIthinkgettingoutthereand
datingwouldbeagoodthingforme.MaybeI’llbringadatetotheball.”

“Ialmostforgotabouttheball.”Janehoststwoballsperyear.Theticketsarealwaysinsuchhigh

demand.IneedtoaskZacktobemydate.

“Iwon’ttellJane,”sheteasesme.“Thanksfortalkingwithme.I’veneededtotellsomeonefora

longtime.”

“IloveMatt,butdon’tlethimtearyoudown.Findyourselfagreatguywhoappreciatesyou.You

deserveit,andifhecan’tgivethattoyou,youneedtomoveon.Havingsexwithhimcan’tbeeasy
foryou.”

“It’snot,andyou’reright.Ideservebetter.”
Wehugandthensheshoosmeaway,tellingmeshe’llbeokay.Iturneverythingbackon,andhead

downtomyofficetodropmytablet.Idon’texpecttofindMattwaitinginthereforme.

“Didyouneedsomething,Matt?”
“Ohhey.Igotanalertthatthecameraswentdowninthesmallconferenceroom,anditsaidthat

youtookthemoffline.”

“Yes.Idid.”
“Why?”
“IwastalkingtoReina,andwedidn’twanttoberecordedoroverheard.”
“Oh.YouwererecountingsomesexytimeswithTaylor,huh?”
Iknowhe’sfishing,andluckyhim,I’mjustpissedenoughathimtotellhim.“No.Weweretalking

aboutyou.”

“Me?Shit.Whatdidshetellyou?”
“Whatdoyouthinkshetoldme?”
“Canyouturnoffthethingsinhere?”
“Ialreadydid.”
“Shetoldyouweslepttogethertheothernight,didn’tshe?”
Idon’tanswerbecauseIpromisednottotalkaboutit.Iwantto,though.Iwanttoscreamathimand

tellhimtostopusingherwhenit’sobviousthatshe’sinlovewithhim.

“It’smorecomplicatedthanitseems.”
“Soun-complicateitforme.”
“Ican’t.JustknowthatIwishIcouldhaveher,andonlyher.Iwishshecouldbemine.Butthat’snot

anoptionforme.”

“You’reagoodman,Matt.Whycan’tyouseethat?”
“BecauseI’mreallynot.I’vealreadysaidtoomuch,andI’mnotgoingtobaretherestofmyblack

soultoday.Takecare,LittleMouse.”

Hekissesmeontheforeheadbeforeleaving.Isinkintomychair,worryingaboutmytwofriends.

They’dbesogoodtogether,butnoonecanforceMatttodoanything.I’mafraidthatbythetimehe
realizes he can have Reina, she’ll have settled for someone else. Losing her is the one thing he
couldn’thandle,andhe’sprobablygoingtoendupinjailwhenthathappens.

Iimmersemyselfinworkforthenextfewhours.ImakesureEllie’sgettingthesupportsheneeds,

andcheerwitheveryoneelseonmyteamwhenshereportsin.Shegotthewoman—anAmericanwho
waskidnappedwhileonvacation—out,andthey’rebothontheirwaybacktothestates.

Shesignsoffquickly,needingtobewiththevictim.Aidentakesoverandrecordshisversionofthe

events. He was Ellie’s back-up since a man was needed to help infiltrate the compound where the

womanwasbeingheldat.We’rereallyluckytohaveMattandhisfriendshelpingusout.Itwouldbe
hardtofindguystotrustwithoursecretswhoalsohavetheskillsetnecessarytohelpus.

Matt, Aiden, and Nate are all great guys. Who’ve also slept their way through Chicago, and are

workinghardtoconquerVegasaswell.Whilethreeofmyfriendspineforthem.ReinaforMatt,Ellie
forAiden—Iapologizedtoherforusinghimforthatkiss—andJadeforNathan.Ifthoseguyswould
stoptryingtosticktheirdicksineveryfemaletheycomeacross,we’dallbealothappier.

IputthosethoughtsoutofmyheadasIcallJaketomyoffice.HewenttoschoolwithmeandScott,

and is my right hand down here in the tech dungeon. We go over my mission, the completion of
Ellie’s,andthenewoneDarcyisstartingtomorrow.ImakesurehehaseverythingheneedsbeforeI
logoutofmytabletandclosemyofficedoor.ItextZackasItaketheelevatorupstairs.Iwashere
muchlaterthanIplannedtobe,soIhopehestillwantstocomeover.

Me:I’monmywayhome.Doyoustillwanttocomeover?
Zack:Iwasn’tsureyouweregoingtotext.It’salittlelate.
Me:Areyououtsomewhere?
Zack:Yeah.Acoupleoftheguysaskedmetohangout,andIwashungry.
Me:You’reatarestaurant?
Zack:No.We’reatTAOBeach.
He’satatoplesspool?God,I’msostupid.
Me.Oh.Okay.I’llseeyoutomorrow.Havefun.
Zack:Youcan’tjustexpectmetositaroundalldaywaitingforyou,Ains.
Me:Idon’texpectthat.Ijustexpectthatifyousayyouwanttocomeover,youreallymeanit.

It’sfine,though.LikeIsaid,havefunandI’llseeyouonthefieldtomorrow.

Zack:It’snotlikethat.I’mjusthangingoutwiththeguys.
Zack:Ains?Comeonbabe,answerme.
Myphonestartsringing,butIignoreit.Ican’ttalktohimrightnow.Iwanttotrusthim,buthe’sat

atoplesspool.Whatguyhangsoutatoneofthoseifhe’snotwantingtobewiththewomenthere?I
knowIshouldn’tdoit,butIgotohisFacebookpage.Iknowifhe’sbeentheremorethantenminutes,
therewillbepics.

Insteadofpics,Ifindangrypostsfromwomenherefusedtoposewith.Orflirtwith.Fromwhat

I’m reading, he just hung out with his friends. He signed things for the guys who were there, but
ignoredthewomenwhoapproachedhim.NowI’mtheonewhofuckedup.Iswitchovertomytext
screen.

Me:I’msorry.Ishouldn’tbejealousofsomerandomtoplesswomen.Whoyouignored.
Zack:YouwentonmyFBpage,didn’tyou?
Me:Yes.
Zack:Youshouldn’thaveneededtodothat.
Me:Iknow.Ijustdidn’tthinkIcouldcompetewiththem.
Zack: There was no competition. You had me. Only you. I can’t talk to you right now. I’m

angryanddon’twanttosaysomethingI’llregret.I’llseeyoutomorrow.

IforcemyselftoputmyphoneawayandremaincalmwhileIdrivehome.Imaintainthatfalsecalm

while I make myself dinner, change into a loose t-shirt, and put on plaid pajama pants. I put on his
jacketsoIcanwearitforonemorenightasIcurluponthecouch.

OnlythendoIpullmyphonebackout,lookingatthatlastmessage.WherehetoldmeI“had”him.

Nothave—had.It’sover,andthistimeI’mtoblame.

CHAPTER14

Zack

I pull out my phone to check the time. I should’ve gone home an hour ago, but I stayed here on

principle.IseethatIleftmytextconversationwithAinsleyopen.Ireadoveritagain,andsuckina
breathatthelastmessageIsenther.Myauto-correctchangedaword.Justone,butofcourseit’sthe
onethatshould’vematteredthemostinthatmessage.Fuck.Ineedtogettoher.

I pull out my wallet and hand the waitress more than enough cash to cover the one beer and two

watersthatIhad.IpracticallyruntovalettoretrievemySUVandthendrivetoAinsley’splace.I’m
hopingsheleftmynameontheapprovedlistsinceIwassupposedtocomeover.Luckiswithmeas
I’mwavedintotheundergroundgarage.

Isayhitotheguysinthelobby,andtaketheelevatoruptoherflooroncetheyactivateitforme.I

knowherdoorwillbeunlocked.SheonlylocksitwhenI’minsidewithher.Iopenit,andmyheart
sinksasIseehercurleduponthecouch.Inmyletterman’sjacket.

“Zack.”
“Hi.”
“You’rehere.”
“Yeah. I didn’t realize my phone changed the word in my text to you. I would’ve made sure you

knewthatrightawayifI’dseenit.ButIwasangrythatyoudidn’ttrustme,soIputmyphonebackin
mypocketrightaway.IdrovehereassoonasIsawit.”

“Whatwordgotchanged?”
“Themostimportantone.‘Have.’Itshould’vesaidhaveandnothad.Youhaveme.”
She launches herself at me, and I catch her in my arms, picking her up. She wraps her arms and

legsaroundmeasIwalkusbacktothecouch.Isitdownandkissher.

“I’msosorryIwassuchajealousbitch.YouunderstoodthatIwantedtohangoutwithmyfriends.I

should’vebeenequallyunderstandingwhenyouwerewithyours.Eventhoughthelocationyouchose
tohangatleaveslittletobedesired.”

“Iwanttosayit’sokay,buthonestly,I’mstillalittleangryaboutyourreaction.Youshouldn’thave

neededtogoonsocialmediatoknowthatIwasignoringotherwomen.”

“Iknow.Youhaveeveryrighttobeangrywithme.Iwanttotrustyou.I’mtryingtotrustyou.”
“Iknowmypastisbad.Likereallybad.ButI’vedoneeverythingIcanthinkoftoletyouknowhow

muchIloveyou.Toshowyouthatyou’reitforme.Imean,Iguessthere’sonemorethingIcoulddo,
butIhaven’tboughtaringyet,andI’dhatetoproposeempty-handed.”

“You-youwanttomarryme?”
“Oneday,yes.ButIneedtoknowyoutrustme,Ains.Wecan’tevergetmarriedifwedon’ttrust

eachother.”

“Iloveyou,ZacharyTaylor,andI’mgoingtodoeverythingIcantobeworthyofthatring.”
“I’m going to make sure I’m worthy of you by the time I buy it, Ainsley Martin. Because I love

you,too.”

“WouldyougototheCorriganFoundationballwithmenextmonth?”

“We’reactuallygoingtowalkintoaballtogether?”
“Ifyou’llgowithme.”
“OfcourseI’llgowithyou.”
WekissforalongtimeonthecouchandthenIcarryheruptoherbed.Imakesweet,slowloveto

herbeforeshefallsasleepwithherheadonmychest.IlookdownatherandthinkabouthowluckyI
am.We’vehadsomebumpsalongtheway,butIknowwe’reinagoodplacenow.Icuddlehercloser
andfallasleepwithinminutes.

IwakeupandthinkI’mstilldreamingbecausemycock’sinAinsley’smouth.Ilookdownandher

eyesaretwinklingassheseesthatI’mawake.Shestartssuckingharderasherhandmovesnearmy
base.Iarchmybackandgrabthesheets.Iwanttograbherhead,butIknowthatthisisbigforher,so
Idon’twanttopushher.She’sdoinganawesomejobonherown.

ItonlytakesanotherminutebeforeIcan’thelpthrustingintohermouthasIfeelmyselfstartingto

come.Idoputmyhandsonherheadthen,tryingtopullheraway.“I’mcoming,Ains.Letgo.”

Sheshakesherheadandsucksharder.Icomeonayell,andshedrinksitalldown,lickingupevery

lastdrop.Thenshelicksherlipsasshesmilesatme.

“OhGod…babe...God…”
“Ididokayformyfirsttime?”
Ilookuptowhereshe’sclimbedontopofme.She’sbitingherlipandlooksnervous.Iwanttotell

herit’sthebestI’vehad,butIdon’tlietoher.Andwhileitwasmindblowing,I’vehadbetterbecause
I’vebeenblownbypros.

“Itwasamazing.You’reamazing.”
“Really?Iwantedtodoitright.”
“Yes,really.Anditwouldbeprettyhardtodoitwrong.”
“I-Ilikedit.Alot.IknowyousaidIwould,butIwasn’tsure.”
“I was being an ass when I said that, trying to make you do what I wanted. You know you didn’t

havetodothat.”

“Iknow.Iwantedtotryit,andthen…well,thenitmademefeelkindofpowerful.Andsexy.”
“Good.Youarethosethings.”
I’vebeensointentontalkingtoher,andmakingsureshe’sokaythatIdidn’tnoticehermovingon

topofme.ButnowIdo.She’srubbingherselfagainstmyabs,tryingtogetrelease.Imovemyhand
downtoherclitandstartrubbingmythumboveritwhileIputtwofingersinsideofher.

“Don’tstop.Please.Iknowthiswassupposedtobeforyou,butthatmademe…I’m…”
“Shh,babe.I’vegotyou.”
Ileanupandpullanippleintomymouthasshearchestowardsme.Itdoesn’ttakelonguntilshe’s

screaming and soaking my fingers. I pull my fingers out once she’s finished, bringing them to my
lipssoIcantasteher.

“Ilovethetasteofyou.Ishould’vejustputmymouthonyou,butthenwewould’veneverleftthis

bed.”

“Youtastedreallygood,too.CanIdothatagainlater?”
“Are you trying to make me practice with a hard-on? Because if you keep talking like that, I

guaranteethat’swhatI’llbedoing.”

“Youdon’tnormallydothat?”
“Semi,babe,Icanusuallycontrolitdowntosemi-hardwhenyou’reatpractice.”
“Ionlycauseasemi?IneedtofindthosebootyshortsStellaboughtme.”
Shetriestogetupoffthebed,butIgrabherandpullherunderme,ticklingherallover.“Later.

Please wear them later. If you wear them to practice, I’m probably going to embarrass myself by

cominginmypants.AndIsaidIcontrolitdowntoasemi—yougetmefullyhardeverytimeIsee
you.”

She’s laughing hard as I continue my assault. “Stop tickling me and I’ll consider wearing more

clothes.”

Istopandkissherinstead.Sheplacesherhandsonmycheeks,caressingmyfaceasIrubherhips.

“HowdidIevergetluckyenoughtomeetyou,Ains?”

“We’rebothlucky,Ithink.Nowgetintheshowerbeforeyoumakemecrywithallthissappytalk.

YouknowI’mallgirlwhenitcomestomyemotions.”

Ilaugh,kissheronthenose,andjumpoffthebed.Ahalfhourlater,we’reoutthedoor.She’sgot

onjeans,andabaggyt-shirtundermyjacket.Herhair ’sinamessybunandshe’swearingglassesand
herChucks.Iknowit’sallformybenefit,butshe’sstillsexyashell.AndI’mashardasasteelpipe.

***

Ainsley

Thegame’stomorrowandI’mreallyexcitedforeveryone.Theguyshavebeengettingbetterand

bettereveryday.SohaveZackandme.We’vespentthelastfewnightstogether,usuallyatmyplace.
It’sbeennothingshortofamazing.Notjustthesex,although,I’llnevercomplainaboutthat.Wehave
somuchfuntogether,justdoingnormalthingslikecookingdinnerorwatchingTV.Wetriedtoplay
Monopolyonenight,butwe’rebothtoocompetitiveandZackalmostendedupsleepingonthecouch
thatnight.Almost.Ireallycan’tresisthim.

Nothingelsehashappenedtotheteam.Janeisafraidsomethingbigwillhappenatthegame,soall

thegirls,exceptforDarcy,willbethere.Shehastofinishpreparingforhermission.Theothereight
willbespreadoutaroundthestadiumMatt,Aiden,andNatewillbethere,too.Weneedasmanyeyes
aspossible,andmyteamwillbemonitoringeverythingremotelyaswell.

We’re having dinner with the Rivers’ and all the other players and coaches. There’s no alcohol

beingserved,anditwillbeanearlynight,buttheywantedacelebration.Zack’sagent,Dex,showed
upunexpectedly,makingmyguyalittlepissedwhenhetriedgethimtotalkaboutatradeagain.

I know he needs to be relaxed for tomorrow, so I made sure to put his hand on my thigh during

dinner.Ihaveonashortpurpledresswithabowdetailinback,andtherequisitestrappyheels.Iknow
helikesit—evenwiththehigherneckline—becausehetoldmeit’sagoodthingwe’llbegoinghome
separately tonight. We have to. He needs to be rested, which will definitely not happen if we’re
together.

Wesayourgoodbyesatthefrontdoor.Heheadsouttohiscar,andIgotousetherestroombefore

Ileave.It’sironicallythesameoneImetZackin.WhenIwalkoutside,IaccidentallybumpintoDex
as he’s coming around the house. My body stiffens, and although I try to hide my reaction, it’s too
late.Heseesitandpushesmeagainstthewall,coveringmymouthwithhishand.IstarttofightwhenI
feelthegunagainstmyside.

“Notthistime,bitch.”
He’stheone.Dexistheguywhotriedtoattackmeinmyhotelroom.Irealizeditwhenmybody

connectedwithhis.Idon’tknowwhy,buthe’sdefinitelypartofit.Kevinwalksaroundthesideofthe
houseamomentlater.Hesmileswhenheseesus,andmysuspicionsabouthimareconfirmed.

He stands next to Dex, blocking me from the other party stragglers. “This is going to be fun.

Taylor ’sgoingtocrumblewhenshe’snotatthegametomorrow.Ijustwantagoatherbeforewekill
her.”

“Keepitinyourpants,Donaldson.She’scausedusalltoomuchtroublealready.Wedon’tneedher

magicsnatchpullingyouunderherspell,too,”Coachsaysashejoinsus.

“Icanseeyoutryingtofigureitallout,Ainsley.Sincewe’regoingtokillyouanyway,I’llletyou

inonoursecret.WehaveourownNFLteamreadytogo.Itwassupposedtobetheonetodebutthis
year,butMitchellCorriganandGaryGriffinweretoopowerfulforustowinagainst.Whenthisteam
fallsapart,we’llbeallset.YoualmostruinedpartofourplanbygettingZacktostayhere,butnow
thatwon’tbeanissue.Hewantsyouatthatgametomorrowmorethanhewantsawin.”

It’sallcomingtogetherforme.Irememberbrieflylookingintotheotherteamthatwould’vemade

it in this year if the Legions hadn’t. It was owned by a dummy corporation that was set up in the
Cayman Islands. Jake’s been trying to track down the owners, but he hasn’t had any luck so far. I
didn’tthinktoomuchofitsinceIdidn’tbelieveanyonefromthatcompanywould’vebeenabletoget
closetotheLegions.

IwaswrongandnowI’mbeingkidnappedbecauseIwasn’tasthoroughinmyjobasIshould’ve

been.Andthey’reright.Zack’sgoingtofreakwhenI’mnotthere.Ihavetothinkofawayoutofthis.
I’vebeentrained,Ishouldknowwhattodo.

“We’re going to walk out of here quietly now. Stand on her other side, Jim. And Kev, you walk

behindus.Don’teventhinkoftryinganything.”

Dextakeshishandoffmymouth,butpusheshisgunfurtherintomyside.Igetthehint.I’llbeshot

ifIscreamormakeascene.AndImaybewelltrained,butthere’sthreeofthem,andonlyoneofme.
LindseyandJackstopusbeforewecangetveryfar.

“Goodnighteveryone.Iseeyou’relookingafterAinsleyforZack.”
“Thatweare.Weknowhowmuchitmeansforhimtohaveheratthegametomorrow.”
Lindsey knows something’s wrong—I can see it in her eyes. “I forgot to tell you that I talked to

yourmothertoday,andtoldherwhatagreatjobyou’redoing.ShesaidIshouldcallyourAuntJane
andtellheraswell.ShewasworriedthatJanewasmadatyou.”

“Ifyoucouldcallher,that’dbegreat.Idefinitelywanthertoknowwhat’sbeengoingon.Thanks

somuch,Lindsey.”

Iknowshe’llcallJaneassoonasshecan,soI’malittlecalmerasI’mwalkedtomycar.They’ll

activatemytrackerandfindme.DextellsKevintogetinthefrontseatandthenpushesmeintothe
backwithhim.Coachgetsinhisowncarandheadsinanotherdirection.AssoonasIgetintothecar,
my hope fades. Dex is holding my arm against me as he pulls a Taser out of his jacket pocket. He
shocksmeonmysiderightnexttomyarm.Iknowit’stooclosetomytrackerwhichwillmakeit
malfunction,andasIfallintotheblackness,IrealizethatI’mprobablygoingtodie.

Mypredictionhasn’tcometrueyetsinceIeventuallywakeup.Idon’tknowwhytheyhaven’tkilled

me yet, but I thank God for keeping me alive. I’m chained to a wall in a dark basement. At least, I
thinkit’sabasement.Itispitchblackinhere,andIcan’tgetmybearings.IfI’mgoingtosurvive,I
needtostartplanning.

I’mreallyhungry,butsincethere’snochanceofmegettingfoodunlessoneofthemcomesback,I

willmymindtoovercomemyhunger.Itdoesn’tcompletelywork,butIcan’tdwellonthatnow.Ipull
onthechainsthatarewrappedaroundmybody,buttheydon’tbudgeatall.Itrytosuckinmybreath
toseeifIcanwigglefreebymakingmyselfsmaller,butit’snouse.Oneofthoseguysissmart.My
money’sonDex.

Withnowindowsorclock,Ireallydon’tknowhowlongI’vebeendownhere.Noneofthemcan

missthegame,soIthinkIhavetimetosleep.ThemorerestIcanget,thestrongerI’llbe.Myonly
hoperightnowisthatthey’llunchainmebeforekillingme.I’llfightthemusingeverythingIknow
andallthestrengththat’sleftinme,ifthathappens.

IclosemyeyesandthinkofZackasIfallasleep.Isayaprayerthathe’llbeokayandplayagood

game,evenwhilehe’sdistractedwithmenotbeingthere.

CHAPTER15

Zack

I can’t believe Ainsley’s not here. Coach said she called him and said she’s not feeling well. But

she’snotansweringmytextsorcalls.Ithoughteverythinghadbeengoinggreat,butImusthavedone
somethingwrong.I’vewrackedmybrain,butIcan’tcomeupwithwhatitcouldbe.Shekissedme
whenwesaidgoodbyelastnight,soIknowshewasn’tmadthen.

Ican’tdwellonit,though.Evenwithoutherheretocheermeon,Ineedtogooutthereandplayto

win.Sierra’shereatleast.ShepromisedtocheerextrahardwhensheheardthatAinsleywouldn’tbe
here.

“Heyman,Iheardyourgirlwon’tbeheretoday.Haveyoutalkedtoher?”Dexasksme.
“No.Iguessshe’sprettysick.”
“Listen,Ihatetobetheonetotellyouthis,butIsawherleavingwithDonaldsonlastnight.”
“What?Shewouldn’tgoanywherewiththatasswipe.”
“I only know what I saw. Just try to put it all out of your head and play a good game. You can

alwaysaskheraboutitwhenshefeelsbetter.”

Shewouldn’tdothat.Iknowshewouldn’t.IknowhowIcanfindout,though.IseekoutJackRivers

andfindhiminCoach’soffice.

“HiZack.Didyouneedsomethingbeforethegame?”
“Ijusthadaquestion.DidyouseeAinsleyleavewithDonaldsonlastnight?”
“Yeah.Webothdid,”Coachanswers.
“Hesaidhewastakingcareofherforyou.Shelookedalittlepale,”Jacktellsme.
“Oh.Okay.Thanks.”
Maybe she is sick. He said she was looking pale. I walk back out and into the locker room.

Donaldsonsmirksatme,andittakesallthecontrolIhavetonotpunchhim.

Weneedtowinthisgame,soIwalkawayandtakemyplaceinthetunnel.Whenthemusicplays,I

run onto the field with everyone else. I automatically look to where Ains should be, then shake my
headandfindSierrainthestands.

The first half of the game passes in a blur. I don’t make any touchdowns, and neither does

Donaldson,buttheotherguyspickuptheslackandwe’reupbytenpointsasweheadbackintothe
lockerroom.We’reonlyinthereforafewminutesbeforeMattCorriganandthatAidenguyburst
intothelockerroom,followedbyAinsley’sfriend,Audrey.

“There’sabombinhereandoneinthevisitor ’slockerroom.Weneedtogetyoualloutofhere.”
“Whatareyougoingtodo,prettylady,disarmit?”Donaldsonasksher.
“Yes,Iam,youbastard,”shetellshimbeforepunchinghimsquareinthejaw.
Hestumblesbackwards,andAidengrabshim.MattgoesovertoCoach.Iseetheglintofagunand

myeyeswiden.“Taylor,youneedtocomewithus.”

“Mysister ’sinthestands.”
“Tegangother,Zack.GowithMatt.He’llhelpyou.”

I nod at Audrey and follow them out. We get into a large party bus type vehicle and I see Sierra

alreadyinsidewithTegan.Irunovertoher,andwehug.MattandAidenthrowDonaldsonandCoach
downontoseatsandholdgunsonthem.AnotherguycomesinwithDexandtosseshimdownnextto
them.JaneCorrigangetsonnext,followedbyReina,Stella,Ellie,Faith,Jade,andtheRivers’.Wesit
insilenceforafewminutesuntilAudreyandIsabellejoinus.Thenthebusstartsmoving.

“Thebombsareneutralized?”Janeasks.
“Yes.They’rebothdisarmed.Metro’stakenover,”Audreytellsher.
“What’sgoingon?Therewerebombsinthestadium?Whocouldbedoingallofthis?”Jackasks.
“Thethreeofthem,”Mrs.CorrigansaysassheglaresatDex,Donaldson,andCoach.
“What?Why?Andhowdoyouknow,Jane?”
“Your wife asked me and my team for help in figuring out who was sabotaging the team. We’ve

beenpursuingseveralanglesandknewMr.Donaldsonwasinvolved,butitwasonlyanhouragothat
wefoundoutthemotiveandwhohistwoaccompliceswere.”

“You’recrazy.Ihavenothingtodowiththis,youoldbitch.”
MattshootsDonaldsoninthearm.“Oops,”hesayswhileglaringathim.Holyfuckingshit.Imean,

yeahheinsultedhisgrandmother,butthatwasbeyondbad-ass.

“Youshotme.Someonehelpme.”
“Itwasafleshwound.Manup.”
“Thankyou,Matthew.”
“Anytime,Gram.”
“AsIwassaying,wefoundoutthismorningthatthesethreearebehindthedummycorporationthat

ownstheotherteamthatwaslookingforaplaceintheNFLthisseason.We’vebeenwatchingthemall
closely,andsawDexsetthebombsbeforeyouandtheotherteamcamebacktothelockerrooms.I
guesshavingtwoteamsoutofthewaygaveyouanextrachancetogetyourteaminplace.”

“Youcan’tproveanyofthis.”
“Ilovenothingmorethanresearch,andwithAinsley’steamofgeniusesworkingthecomputerend

ofthings,wefoundmorethanenoughevidence,”Tegantellshim.

I see Donaldson smirk when Ainsley’s name is mentioned. There’s so much information going

aroundthatIthinkmybrainmayexplode.ButI’mstillwonderingwheresheis.I’mnottheonlyone.

“YouthinkTeganmentioningAinsleyisfunny,Kevin?”Reinaaskshim.
“Alittle.”
Sheopensupacaseatherfeetandlaysitflat.IthasallkindsoftoolsandthingsIdon’trecognize.

Theylookprettyscary,though.

“Icanguaranteethatyouwon’tbelaughingwhenI’mdonewithyou.”
“Youcan’ttouchme.It’sillegal.”
“Who’sgoingtobelieveyouagainstme?I’mapillarofthecommunity.Matt,Nate—canyouhold

himstillplease.”

“No.NO!Please.I’lltellyouwhateveryouwanttoknow.Yes,wewerebehindeverything.Dexwas

themastermind.”

“Shutup,Kev.”
“Don’tworry,Dex.You’llbenextifhedoesn’ttellmewhatIwanttoknow.”
“Ijusttoldyouwe’retoblame.”
“Butyoudidn’ttellmewhereyoutookAinsleylastnight.”
Wait.What?“YoukidnappedAinsley?”
“YourlittleslutfiguredoutthatitwasDexwhoattackedheratthehotel.Wehadtotakeher.Itwas

justanaddedbonusthatyou’dfreakoutifshewasn’tthereforyouatthegame.”

I’moutofmychairbeforeanyonecanstopme.IignoreDonaldsonandgoforDex.Ithrowhim

againstthewindows,holdinghimbyhisneck.“Youdon’thavetoworryaboutReinaandhertoys.I’ll
makeyouwishyouwereneveraliveifyoudon’ttelluswheresheis.”

“Okay.Okay.Calmdown,Zack.She’sfine.Imean,she’sprobablyhungry,butnoneofustouched

her.”

“Where.Is.She.”
“She’sinthebasementofCoach’slakehouse.”
Ilethimgo,andhedropsintohisseat,rubbinghisneck.Thebuspullsoverandtheguyshaulthe

three bastards out. I see them get handed over to the police. The Rivers’ also get off the bus, after
thankingJane.Reinazipshercasebackupandsitsdown.Whentheguysgetbackonboard,westartto
moveagain,headingforLakeMead.

“I know you have some questions, Zack. Normally, I wouldn’t tell you anything, but Ainsley had

alreadyaskedforpermissiontotellyouherselfyesterday.I’mtrustingthatyoursisterwillkeepwhat
I’mabouttotellyousecretaswell.Manylivesdependonthetwoofyoukeepingquiet.”

“Iwon’ttellanyone,andZackwon’teither.Wepromise.Right,bigbrother?”
Inod,andJanetellsusallaboutAinsleyandherfriends.Nowondershesaidshewasn’tlooking

forabetterjobthanbeingafootballconsultant.Shealreadyhasajobthatusesheruniqueskillset,
andgivesherachancetoexploretheworldoutsidehercomputerroom,too.

IfeelpunchedinthegutwhenJanesaysthattheoriginalagreementwasforhertodateDonaldson.

Untilshemetme.Ihearthewordsshe’ssaying.WordsthattellmeAinsleyfellinlovewithmeand
assuredthemthatIwasn’tpartofthesabotage.Ihearthosewords,butallIcanthinkaboutishowit
wasmorethansecretsshewaskeepingfromme.

Iwasjustapartofthismission,nothingelse.NomatterwhatJanesays,Iknowthat.I’veneverbeen

anythingotherthanabodyforwomentouse.Thiswasnodifferent.Iwasameanstoanend.Sheused
morethanmybody,butIwasnothingtoher.Absolutelynothing.

Wepulluptothehouse,andIsitnumblyinthebuswhiletheguysandsomeofthegirlsrunoutto

getAinsley.Ijuststarestraightahead.Mysistertriestotalktome,butIshakemyheadandlookaway
from her. Right into Reina’s eyes. She sees what I’m thinking, I know she does, because her eyes
narrow.

MattcomesbackcarryingAinsleyinhisarms.Sheseesmeandstrugglestoherfeet.“Zack.”
“Don’tcomenearme.”
“What’swrong?”
“Iknoweverything.Iknowhowyouneededmeforyoumission.”
“No.Itwasn’tlikethat.Imean,itwasalittlebit,butIloveyou.”
“Stop. Just stop. There’s no need to pretend anymore. I’ll keep your secret. I’ll keep everyone’s

secret.ButIneedyoutostoplyingtome.”

“I’mnot.Iswearit.”
“ToobadIcan’ttrustyou.”
I turn and walk to the seat farthest away from her. I look out the window, but I see her go to her

kneesoutofthecornerofmyeye.Herfriends—andmysister—surroundher.Mattstartstowardsme,
but Jane stops him shaking her head and whispering something to him. He nods and stops, but the
lookhe’sgivingmetellsmethisisn’tover.

Theytakemebacktothestadiumwheremyclothesandcarare.Thepolicearestillthere,too,but

thingshavequieteddown.Theywaveusthroughoncetheyrealizewhoweare.Mrs.Corriganreally
doeshaveconnectionseverywhere.

“Thanksfortheride,Mrs.Corrigan,andforsavingmylifeandtheteam.Iappreciateit.”

“I’d tell you that you’re welcome, but I’m not feeling too charitable towards you at the moment,

Zachary.”

“I’msleepingwithoneeyeopenIguess,huh?”I’mtryingtojoke,butnoonelaughs.“Comeon,

Si.”

“I’mnotgoingwithyou.”
“What?”
“IneedtomakesureAinsley’sokay.Whatshedoesisawesomeandcool,andyou’reactinglikean

ass.”

“Tellmehowyoureallyfeel,sis.”
“Don’tplaythevictimhere.Youweren’twronged.”
“Priceless.Thisisjustpriceless.Youmustbereallyproudofyourself,Ainsley.Firstyouplaywith

meandmyemotionsandnowyou’veturnedmysisteragainstme.Bravo.”Iclapsilently.

“YouhavetwosecondstogetoffthisbusbeforeIendyou,Football.”
IturnandseeStellapointingagunatme.MyeyeswidenandIbackaway.Ilooktoeveryoneelse,

andthey’realllookingliketheywanttheirgunsonme.Ishakemyheadandwalkoffthebus.Igoto
the locker room and change into my street clothes, then go home where I drink every beer in the
housebeforepassingoutonthefloor.

***

Ainsley

It’sbeentwoweekssinceIwaskidnapped.I’vebeenbackatworkforaweek,andI’mfeelingbetter

andstronger.Atleastphysically.I’mstillamessemotionallysinceZackwon’ttalktome.

Sierrastayedwithmeforacoupleofdays,andImadehergoseehimbeforeshelefttown.She’s

reallyangryatherbrother,butIunderstandhowhe’sfeeling.HisbiggestfearwithmewasthatI’dbe
using him for something. And he thinks I did. Even though I really didn’t. I lied about what I was
doingwiththeteam,butneveraboutwhatwashappeningbetweenus.Ifinallytrustedhim,butnow
he’llnevertrustme.Everydaythatwe’reapartmakesmyheartbreakalittlemore.Idon’tknowwhat
todotogethimtobelievethathewasn’tjustpartofthemission.

There’saknockonmydoorframeandIlookuptoseeFaith.Shelooksalittlenervous.
“What’swrong,Faith?”
“IjustsawsomethingIthinkyouneedtosee.IwishIdidn’thavetobetheonetoshowittoyou,

though.”

“Itcan’tbethatbad.Justshowme.”
Sheturnshertablettomeandstartsthevideo.
“Local football heartthrob Zack Taylor seems to have found someone to help him get past the

scandal that’s rocked the Legions and sidelined the team for a month. He’s been spotted out several
timesthisweekwithDr.DeidreLind.Thedoctorisanotedpediatricsurgeon,andsourcessaytheymet
whilehewasvisitingpatientsintheChildren’swardatalocalhospital.Theymakeastrikingcouple.
Allinall,thisisawelcomechangefromtherevolvingdoorofwomenhe’shadonhisarmformostof
hiscareer.I’msurethousandsofheartsarebreakingaroundthevalleyrightnow.”

“I’msosorry,honey.”
“Youdidn’tdoanythingwrong.Iwould’veseenthissomewhereelseifyouhadn’tshownittome.”
Hewould’vemadesureIsawit.Iknowthatthisisamessagetome.Hemaycareforthiswoman,

buthe’salsodatinghertoshowmehecan.ThatI’mnottheonlywomanwhousesherbrainthathe
canget.Point,Taylor.

***

Zack

Deidre’snice,buttiring.Shelikestobetakenoutsoshecanbeseenwithme.She’susingmeand

I’mgettingnothingoutofthedeal.Well,almostnothing.IknowAinsleyhadtohaveseenpicturesof
us.Sothere’sthat.

I usually try to turn into Deidre as the pictures are taken so it looks like we’re intimate. Even

though we’re not. I haven’t kissed her anywhere but her cheek, I don’t hold her hand, and we
definitelyhaven’tgonetobedtogether.Ihaven’tevenletherseemyhouse.She’sbeenpushinglately,
but it’s not going to happen. My heart, and body, still belong to the brilliant computer girl who
deceivedme.

I’vetriedgettingoverAinsley,butI’vecometorealizethatit’sjustnotgoingtohappen.I’mstill

pissedather,butmyloveforherhasn’tlessenedanysinceIfoundoutthetruth.Sierratellsmeshe’sa
wreck,andthatshereallylovesme,butI’mjustnotreadytobelieveityet.

Ishakemyheadtoclearthoughtsofblueeyesandsexylips.IhavetofinishgettingdressedsoIcan

pickupDeidreforournightoutatalocalclub.Theshowmustgoon.

Afewhourslater,Irealizethattheshowneedstoend.Forgood.I’vehadtopushheroffmylap

moretimesthanIcancount,andshekeepstryingtokissme.

“Enough, Deidre. I told you no, and you’re smart enough that you should understand what that

wordmeans.”

“Comeon,Zack.We’rebothsexualpeople.Ineedatasteofyou.”
“Well,Idon’tneedorwantatasteofyou.Thisisn’tworkingandIdon’twanttoseeyouagain.”
“You’rekidding,right?”
“I’dsay‘no’butyou’dprobablypretendnottohearmeagain.SoI’mjustgoingtoleave.”
Imotionthenewstartingquarterbackoverandaskhimtokeepaneyeonherandtakeherhome.

Shesmilesathim,andIrealizethatshe’sfoundhernextmark.Luckilyforthemboth,helovesthe
spotlightasmuchasshedoes.

IgohomeandwhenIwalkinthedoor,IseethecollagethatImadeforAinsley.Irememberhow

happyshewaswhenshesawit.Couldshehavereallyfakedherhappinessthatwell?

IwalkupthestairstotheroomInolongersleepinandseehersexybed.Irememberthatday,and

night. How much fun we had and the love we shared. I don’t think even an Oscar winning actress
could’vefakedthatday.

Shelovesme.Oratleastshedid.Idon’tknowifshestilldoes,butIknowthatIneedtofindout.I

wantherback.No,Ineedherback,andIknowjusthowtostart.IhopethepeopleIneedhelpfrom
willhelpme.I’llbegifIhaveto.

CHAPTER16

Zack

I’m waiting at my house for everyone to show up. I did have to beg, and promise to explain

everythingoncetheygothere.I’veneverbeensonervousinmylifebefore.Ineedtoconvincethem
tohelpme.Myplanhingesonthat.

My doorbell rings and I open the door. I’m immediately knocked backwards at the punch that

comesflyingatme.“Fuck.”

“I warned you not to mess with Ainsley. I told you I was an enemy that you didn’t want to have,

asshole.”

“Yes,youdid,”ItellScottasIshakeitoff.“Thankyoubothforcoming.”
Chloeglaresatme,butdoesn’ttrytodomeanybodilyharmasshewalkspastme.I’mwaitingfor

onemorepersontoarrive,andshedoesafewminuteslater.

“Hello,Football,”Stellatellsmeasshewalksin.“Thisbetterbegood.”
“Pleasesitdown,everyone.”
They do, but before I can speak, Scott notices the collage, which I took off the wall, but have

leaningagainstthefireplace.“Holyshit.HasAinsleyseenthat?”

“Yes.Imadeitforherafewweeksago.”
“That’sprettydamncool,man.Youdiditonyourown?”
“Yeah.IusedsomebinarycodetranslatorIfoundonline.”
Heholdsouthishand.“I’min,man.I’llhelpyou.”
Ishakehishandwithasmile.“Thanks.”
“Areyougoingtotellthenon-geniusesoverherewhatitsays?”Stellaasks.
“Youareeveryminuteofmyeveryday,”Itellher.
“Ohhell,I’min,too.”
“Ifyouwonoverthesetwo,howcouldIsayno?”Chloe’ssmilingatmeandI’mfistpumpingin

myhead.

“Thankseveryone.Ijusthaveonequestionforallofyou.”It’stheonlyonethatmatters.
Stella speaks before I can ask. “Yes, she really loves you. She faked her job, but she never faked

anythingwithyou.Thatwasyourquestion,wasn’tit?”

“Yeah.”
“Ihaven’tfallenforaguyonamissionbefore,Zack,butIcanimaginehowharditmustbe.For

both of you. She was going to tell you everything when she could. Which means she was serious
aboutyou.Wecan’ttellcasualacquaintances,orsomeonewethinkwelike.Somanypeopledepend
onus,andourabilitytokeepthingssecret,thatwecan’ttakeitlightly.”

“Igetthatnow.Honestly,IgotitwhenMrs.Corrigantoldme,butallIcouldthinkaboutwasthat

Ainsleywaslikeeveryothergirlwho’dusedmeinmylife.”

“Shewasn’tusingyou.Imean,yeah,sheneededtogetclosetotheteam,butJackRiversgavehera

job that took care of that. We don’t do missions thinking we’ll fall in love. We do them because
someoneneedshelpandwehavetheskillstodojustthat.Helppeople.”

“IknowIsaidjustonequestion,butnowthingskeeppoppingintomyhead.”
“Goaheadandask.She’slikeasistertome,andIneedtoknowyou’reallinwithher.”
“Ithinkshethoughtofmeasasuspectforalittlewhile.Evenwhileweweresleepingtogether.”
“That’snotaquestion,butyes,shedid.”
“Thequestionis,wouldshehaveturnedmeinifIwasguilty?”
“Yes.Withouthesitation.Shelovesyou,andshe’ddoallshecouldtohelpyou,butshewould’ve

turnedyouin.”

“Thatshouldmakemefeelworse,butitdoesn’t.Iguessit’sbecauseIlovewhosheis,andknowing

thatshewouldn’tcompromiseherselfformemakesmehaveevenmorerespectforher.”

“Ihavetoaskyousomething,Zack.”
“Sure,Chloe.”
“Youaskedusheretohelpyouwinherback.ButI’veseenthenews.You’vebeendatingthatdoctor

forthelastweek.What’sgoingonwithher?”

“Iwasn’treallydatingher.Imean,IguessIwas.ButIneverkissedheranywherebuthercheekand

onlytookheroutinpublic.IhonestlywashopingI’dfeelsomethingforher.ButIneverdid.Ihooked
herupwiththenewLegionsquarterbacklastnight.TheylookedveryhappywhenIlefttheclub.”

“Okay.Sowhatisityouneedfromus?”
Itellthem,andtheyallagreethatmyplanissolid.Chloetellsmeherbrother-in-law,Owen,will

helpmewiththeadditionsIwanttomaketothecollage.Scottsaysheshouldhelpwithsomethingelse
as well. Chloe says she can easily take care of everything I want done in the next week. Stella says
she’llenlistFaithtohelpherwiththelastpartofmyplan.Everything’sinplacebythetimetheyleave
acouplehourslater.

***

Ainsley

Another week has gone by, and I’m starting to feel better emotionally. Even though I saw on the

newsthatZack’snolongerdatingthedoctor,Iknowhewon’ttakemeback.Ihadatalkwithmyself
yesterday and realized that I have to go on with my life. My heart will put itself back together.
Eventually.

I’m analyzing the results from Darcy’s mission when I hear all conversation in the outer office

stop.IlookuptoseeStellawalkingtowardsme—withZack.No.Justno.I’vebeendressingupalittle
more than usual, but I’m still a mess. Slouchy black tee, short pink skirt with a zipper up the front,
caprileggings,andcombatboots.Yeah,that’sme.Oh,andlet’snotforgetthatmyhair ’sbeingheldin
placebyabunchofpencilsandpens.OrthatIhavemyglasseson.Howcouldshedothistome?

Istandupandtrytolooknormal.Idon’tfeelnormal,though.Helookssogood,walkingtowards

meinhist-shirtandjeans.Iknowwhat’sunderneathhisclothesandwhat’sinhisheart.I’vemissedit
allsomuch.I’vemissedhim.It’stakingeveryounceofself-respectIhaveinmetonotflingmyselfat
him.

“Youhaveaguest,Ainsley.”
“H-hi,Zack.”
“Hi,Ains.Thanksforwalkingmedownhere,Stella.”
“You’rewelcome.Playnicewitheachother.”
Iglareather,andshelaughsasshewalksaway.IturnbacktoZackandbitemylip.Westareatone

anotherforafewminutesbeforeIbreakthesilence.

“Howareyou?”

“I’vebeenbetter.”
“Oh yeah. I saw that you and your girlfriend broke up. I mean, not that I was looking for news

aboutyou.Ohhell.Iwastotallylookingfornewsaboutyou,”Iblurtout.

I’manidiot.Atotalidiot.Whotellssomeonethatyou’relookingupnewsstoriesaboutthem?Me,

that’swho.Idiotnumberone.

“She wasn’t my girlfriend. I’ve only ever had one girlfriend. She still has my class ring and

letterman’sjacket.”

“Oh. I don’t have them here.” They’re in my bedroom at home. I sleep in that jacket every night

withtheringonmyfinger.“Icanhavethemsentovertoyourhouse.”

“I’mnothereforthem.”
“You’renot?”
“No.I’mheretoinviteyoutothepartyI’mhavingatthehousetomorrownight.”
“You’rehavingaparty?Atyourhouse?Really?”
“Yes.I’mhavingapartyatmyhouse.Iwantedtocelebratetheteambeingabletoplayagainthis

weekend,andabeautifulwomanoncetoldmeIshouldbeentertainingatmyhouseonceIfurnished
it.”

“It’sateamthing,then?”I’mfocusingonthatandnotthefactthathefurnishedthehouse.Without

me.

“Yeah.Justtheteam,theirdates,andyourfriends.”
“Myfriendsaregoing?”
“Yep.”
“Okay.I’dlovetocometoyourparty.Thanksforinvitingme.”
“You’retheonlypersonIreallywantthere.”
“Zack?”
“I want another chance, Ains. I know I’ve had more than my fair share already, but I’m not

interestedinplayingfairwhenitcomestoyou.”

“DoyoubelievethatIloveyou?”
“Ido.”
“Whatconvincedyou?”
“Ourbed.IwaslookingatitandthinkingofthedayIboughtit.Irealizedthatyoucouldn’thave

fakedit,evenifyouwerethebestactressintheworld.Thatdaywasreal,whichmeanstherestofour
daystogetherwerereal.”

“They were, Zack. I understand why you were angry, and hurt. I know how much being used by

womenhashurtyou.AndIknowyouthinkIusedyou,too.ButIdidn’t—ImeanmaybeIdidalittle—
butnotthatway.Neverwhenitcametomyfeelings,oryours.”

“Iknewyouunderstoodbecauseyouknowmesowell.”
“Idoknowyou.”
It’sawkwardforamomentaswestandtherelookingateachotheragain.Neitheroneofusknows

what to do. Zack finally walks over and hugs me. I wrap my arms around him and hold him tight
againstme.Hebreaksawayandsmilesatmebeforestartingforthedoor.Heturnsbeforehereaches
itandgivesmemyspecialsmile.

“Bytheway—this,”hesaysmotioningtomyoutfit.“Thisishot.Likeseriouslyhot.I’mgoingto

needmorethanonecoldshowerwhenIgethome.”

“ThepencilsinmyhairandthecombatbootsI’mwearingturnyouonthatmuch,huh?”
“Yeah.Theyreallydo.Anddon’tforgettheglasses.Hot.Seeyoutomorrow.”
“Bye.”

Ifallbackintomychair,andfanmyself.He’snottheonlyonewhoneedsacoldshower.Ican’t

believemythongdidn’tburstintoflamesfromalltheheathejustcausedtofloodthroughme.Ican’t
waituntiltomorrow.

***

Zack

Everyone’shereexceptforAinsley.Theyallcomplimentmeonthehouseandaskwhatthecollage

says. I tell them it’s something special for just her and I, and most of them leave it alone. Most of
them.Deidre’sbeenaftermesinceshegothere.Apparently,thequarterbackisn’tenoughforher.She
wantstoknowwhyanotherwomanisonthewallofmylivingroomsosoonafterwebrokeup.

“We didn’t break-up, Deidre, because we were never together. I didn’t even kiss you for God’s

sake.”

“Let’sremedythat.”
Before I can process her words, she launches herself at me and kisses me. I push her off

immediately,butrealizeit’stoolatewhenIseeAinsleyrunningfromtheroom.“Stupidbitch.”

“Excuseme.”
“Youheardme.”
Shegoestoslapme,butFaithgrabsherarm.“Ithinkyouneedtoleave.”
I mouth a “thanks” to her as I go into the bathroom to wash my face and mouth. I need to find

Ainsley,butIwanttogetalltracesofDeidreoffofmefirst.Afterafewminutesofmouthwash,Ifeel
good enough to go look for her. I step out onto the back porch and freeze. She’s in the swing with
ScottGriffin.Theycan’tseemewhereI’mstanding,soIdecidetolistenforaminuteandfindoutjust
howbaditis.

“He’s been trying to avoid that woman since she got here. She grabbed him and kissed him. He

pushedherawayimmediately.”

“Hedid?”
“Yes.Andthishouse,Ainsley?HehadChloe,Stella,andIhelphimdesignitforyou.Chloemixed

insomethingsforhim,likethelightsyouboughthim,butheaskedStellaforideasonwhatyou’d
want.”

“Wow.That’s…umm…wow.”
“Yes it is. That collage in the living room is crazy romantic. You ran out before seeing the

additionsOwenhelpedhimwith.Butevenbeforethat…Imeantheguytranslatedwordsintobinary
foryou.IfYasdidthatforme,she’dbecomingallnight.”

“Irewardedhimforthat.”
Yes,shedid.
“Don’tpunishhimforwhatsomeotherchickdid.Helovesyou.Waituntilyouseetheworkroom

hehadmedesignforyou.It’scrazysick,andthedeskOwenbuiltyouisbetterthantheonehebuilt
forme.”

“Jealous,huh?”
“Maybe.There’ssomethingIwantedtotalktoyouabout.SomethinghesaidtomethefirsttimeI

methim.”

“Whatisit?”
“Hesaidthatyouthoughtnoneofusnoticedyouincollege.”
“Oh,well,yeah.”

“Ineedyoutoknowthatweallnoticedyou,Ainsley.Howcouldwenot?You’regorgeous,sexy,

and brilliant. For me personally, I wasn’t planning to settle down; I cared too much for you to just
fuckyou.Theotherguys?Theywerescaredofbeingturneddown.Youwereoutofallourleagues
then, and you still are now. We all put you in that ‘friend zone’ because we had to, not because we
wantedto.I’msoluckytobeabletocallyoumyfriend,andI’malwaysgoingtobehereforyouif
youneedme.Foranything.”

Damnifthatwasn’toneofthemostawesomespeechesI’veeverheard.ScottGriffinwillalways

haveanallyinme.Forwhateverheneeds.BecausehejustmadethewomanIlovefeelgoodabout
herself.Iwatchastheyhugeachothertight.Helooksupandseesme.Henodsashepullsawayfrom
her.

“I’mgoingtogofindmyamazingwifewhileyourmanstepsoutoftheshadowstotakecareof

you.”

“What?”
She turns and I step into the light. Scott and I do the guy hug thing before he walks back inside.

“CanIsitwithyou?”

“Sure.”
Hereyesarestillwet,butshelookssobeautiful.Herhair ’sinanotheroneoftheup-dosshelikes

somuchwhenshe’sdressedup.Herdressisanofftheshoulderstylewithsmallsleeves.It’sanude
colorwithblackstrapsandbucklesalloverit.It’stightontop,butflaresoutalittleatthetopofher
thighs.Hershoescontinuethebuckletheme.

It’snotherdressorshoesthatmakeherbeautiful,though.It’stheconfidenceshe’sshowingmeas

shelooksmeintheeye.“It’snicetoseeyoulookingsosureofyourself.I’mgladhecouldgivethat
toyou.”

“Onlyapartofit’sfromhim.Don’tgetmewrong,itfeltgreattoknowthatheandtheotherguys

wantedme,butit’sevenbettertoknowthatyouwantme.WhenyoutoldmeIwassexyinmymessy
outfittheotherday,Ifeltempowered.YouwantmejustthewayIam.Icanalwaysputononeofthese
sexydresses,butIneedsomeonewhoappreciatesmeforwhoIamdaytoday.Notjustinadress.”

“Ineedthesamething,soIguessit’sgoodthatwegivethattoeachother.”
“Yes.Itis.Verygood.”
I reach for her hand, and she lets me hold it. “Would you like the grand tour of the house? Or

somethingtoeat?Faithoutdidherselfwiththemenu.”

“Foodfirst,maybe.Allthiscryingmakesmehungry.”
“AndhereIthoughtitwasjustthepromiseofmyrecipes.”
IturntoseeFaithandStellawalkingtowardsus.Theyeachhaveaplateanddrinkintheirhand.I

taketheplatefromFaithandhandittoAinsley.IputtheonefromStellaonthetablebesidetheswing,
alongwiththebeerandfruitydrink.

“Thanks.”
“You’renotgoingtoeatthat?”
“Wewill.Wejustalwayseatoffofoneplatetogether,”AinsleytellsStellawithasmile.
“Youtwoaretoofuckingcute.Let’sgo,Faith,beforetheystartusingthe‘L’word.”
“Loveyou,Stella,”Iyellafterherandlaughassheflipsmeoff.
“Myfriendslikeyou.”
“Don’tsoundsosurprised.I’mverylikeable.Somemayevensayloveable.”
Ifeedheraminiquichebeforeshecanrespond.Ormaybesoshecan’trespond.Hereyestwinkle

asshefeedsmeaKobeslider.

“Yoursisterlovesyou,that’sforsure.”
“Yeahshedoes.Ithinkthefansloveme,too,”ItellherasIslipafriedpickleslicebetweenherlips.

Iopenmymouthforaminieggroll.“I’mafan.”
“Myfavoritefan.”
Wegoonlikethatforquiteawhile,flirtingandfeedingeachother.It’sfunandsexy.It’salsoeasy.

There’snothingforcedaboutourbanter.Itcomesnaturally,justlikeitalwayshas.

Theplatesareemptyandwedownthelastofourdrinks.“CanIkissyou,Ains?”
“Don’tyouwanttogominglewithyourguests?”
“Itoldyouyesterdaythatyou’retheonlyoneIwanthere.”
“It’srude.”
“Good.Maybethey’llleave.”
“Onekiss,andthenwegominglebeforeyougivemethetour.”
“Deal.”
Weleaninandmeeteachother ’slips.It’slikewewereneverapart.Iholdthebackofherhead,and

shegrabsmybicep.Webothgroanwhenweincludeourtongues.Shesaidonekiss,butshedidn’tput
atimelimitonit.Idon’tletgoofherlipsforseveralminutes.Ileanmyforeheadagainsthersaswe
bothcatchourbreath.

“Thatshould’vecountedastwentykisses.”
“Mylipsneverleftyours.”
“Technicality.”
“Areyoucomplaining?”
“Hell,no.”
“Ididn’tthinkso.”

CHAPTER17

Ainsley

Thisnighthasbeenkindoflikeafairytale.Zackonlyletgoofmyhandwhenwetookbathroom

breaks.Wedidthattogether—indifferentbathrooms,ofcourse—sowewouldn’tbeapartforlong.
He joked with his teammates and was attentive to my friends. I felt like the queen of the manor as
everyonecommentedontheartworkofusoverthemantel.

With Owen Griffin’s help, Zack added some more words and pictures. They finished it all with

somekindofcoatingandputitunderplexi-glass.Ihaven’thadtimetoexploretherestofthehouse
yet, but even just in the living room I can see the little touches that are there for me. Knick-knacks
have a tech theme and there are splashes of purple here and there. Chloe also added a brick wall
becausesheknowsIlovethem.

ThepartywindsdownandIsaygoodbyetoallmyfriends—fromwork,andtheteam.JackRivers

asked me to be on the sidelines this Sunday, and I told him I’d love to. Once everyone’s gone, and
we’vehelpedFaithandthecrewshehiredcleanup,Zackpushesmeupagainstthewallanddevours
mymouth.Ipullawayeventhoughmybody’sprotesting.

“I’mnotstayingheretonight.”
“Okay.”
Ouch.Thathurtalittle.Ithoughthe’datleasttrytogetmetostay.“Doyoustillwanttoshowme

around?”

“Ofcourse.Youmaynotstaytonight,butthere’salwaystomorrow.OrFriday,afterwegotothe

ball.Icanbepatient.”

“Theball?”
“YoudidaskmetotheballonFriday.Iwashopingtheofferstillstands.”
“Itdoes.Ofcourseitdoes.”
“Good.”
Hekissesthehollowofmyneckandthenstepsback.Hetakesmyhandandleadsmethroughthe

house.Thekitchenislikemine,butbigger.Hisofficehasnicerfurniture,andmoreofit.There’sa
roomwithagiantTVandeverygamingsystemthereis,plusawallfullofgames.Mymouthdrops
openatthatone.Heclosesitwithalaugh,andthenIpushhimagainstthewalltokisshim.

Next to that room is my workroom. I stumble when I walk in the door. It’s amazing. There’s no

otherwordforit.Thecountersaremadeoflightpurpleplexi-glassandfilledwithcomputerpieces
andglitter.Mydeskisadarkerpurple,filledwithcomputerpiecesaswell.Butitalsohasfootballs,
softballs,baseballs,volleyballs,andsoccerballsinthewidelegs.Thereareoutletseverywhere,but
no computers—Scott knows I’d want to bring in my own. There’s shelf space for all the toys and
thingsI’vecollectedtobemovedfrommyapartmenttohere.ThewallshavecoolartworkthatOwen
must’vedone,andjust,wow.Eventhefloorsparkles.It’stheperfectmixoftheoldme,andthenew
me.Thegeekandthegirl.Iloveit.

“Ains.Saysomething,please.”
“It’sperfect.Absolutelyperfect.”

“ThankGod.Scottsaiditwouldbe,butI’veneverseenyourotherworkroom,soIwasn’tsure.”
“Ican’tbelieveyoudidallthisforme.”
“Evenifyou’renotreadyforit,thisisourhometome,babe.”
“I’mscaredtoseetherest.Imaymoveintonight.”
“I’dlovethat,butyoualreadytoldmeyou’renotstayingtonight.”
“I’dsleepinhere.Onthecounter.Seriously.”
“Ifyouwanttostay,youcouldsleepinoneoftheguestrooms.I’monlyusingoneofthesix.”
“You’reinaguestroom?”
“Yes.ThefirsttimeIsleepinourbed,youneedtobetherewithme.”
“You-youdidn’t…withthedoctor?”
“YouthoughtI’dsleepinourbedwithsomeoneelse?”
“Itwasn’tourbedanymore.”
“It’salwaysbeenourbed,anditalwayswillbe.Fortherecord,Ididn’tsleepwithheranywhere.

Untilshelaunchedherselfatmetonight,I’dnevereventouchedmylipswithhers.”

Ipullhimtomesofastthatwebothstumble.Heshootshisarmsoutandgrabsthecounterwithone

hand,andmewiththeother.Istepbackwardandhopontothecounter,pullinghimbetweenmylegs.I
wrap them around him, and capture his mouth. I’m kissing him, and eventually rocking into him.
That’swhenhestopsandpullsaway.

“Nottonight.Youtoldmethatearlier,andeventhoughyoumaywanttostaynow,Ineedtohonor

youroriginalwishes.Idon’twantyoutoregretanything.”

“Fine.Behonorable.Youofferedmeaguestroom,though.”
“ThatIdid.Pickoneandit’syours.”
“ButIhavenopajamas,”IsayasIbatmyeyes.
“Actuallyyoudo,littlevixen.Stellafilledyourclosetanddresserwiththingsyou’dlike.”
Ipinchmyself.Yep,thisisreal.Zackdidallthisforme.EvenafterIdeceivedhim.
“Let’sgocheckoutthoserooms.”
We go upstairs, and I look in all the rooms. He’s had each of them furnished. They’re all

comfortable,andnottoogirly.

“Wouldyourbrothersbeokayinthese?”
“Mybrothers?”
“Yeah.I’dliketomeetthem.Andyourparents.ItoldChloenottomaketheroomstoogirlysothey

couldstaywithus.”

“Um,that’snicebuttheycan’tstaywithus.”
“Whynot?”
“They’remoreprotectivethanthegirls.Theywouldn’tletmesleepinthesameroomasyou.”
“Well,shit.”
“It’snotaproblem.Ihaven’tinvitedthemoutyet.”
“That’strue.Areyoureadytoseeourroom?”
There was something off in his response right now, but I’m too excited to see our bedroom to

dwellonthatrightnow.“Yes,please.”

Wewalktothedoubledoors.Zackpushesthemopenandthenstepstotheside.Iwalkintoafantasy

bedroom.I’mnotevenkidding.It’sboththemostromanticandthesexiestbedroomI’veeverseen.

Ourbedisthecenterpiece,ofcourse.Therearepurpleandgoldsheercurtainsaroundtheposts,

and he had the inlays changed to purple. The other furniture we got at the antique store is
complemented by tufted chairs and a chaise by the big windows. There’s a chandelier—a freaking
chandelier—handingfromtheceiling.

IwalkintothebathroomtoseeabigJacuzzitubandaseparateglassshower.Oneithersideisa

door.OneleadstoanicesizedclosetforZack.Theotherleadstoagiganticclosetanddressingroom
forme.Andit’sfull.Thereareclothes,bags,shoes…everything.Andhe’sright.Stellapickedthings
I’dlike.They’resexy,butcomfortable.NexttothedesignerheelsareChucksineverycolor,andnext
tothegownsarefunkydressesthatI’dprobablywearoverleggings.

“Isitokay?Iseverythingokay?”
IturntoseeZackleaningagainstthedoorlookingsexyashell.Healwayslookshot,butwhenhe’s

inasuit—especiallyonethat’sgothistieandshirtundone—well,ittakeshishotnesstoawholenew
level.

“Yes.Beyondyes.Idon’tknowwhatthatis,butthishouseisit.Isitokayforyou,though?There’s

alotofmethroughout.”

“YousawitbeforeChloedecorated.Idon’tneedorwantmuch.Thefactthatthereisalotofyou

makesmehappybecausethat’sallIneed.You.Besides,thebackyardandthegymareprettymuchall
me.”

“Yeah?”Henods.“Ididn’tnoticeitwhenIwasherebefore,andIcouldn’tseemuchofittonight

sinceitwasdark,butIlovedtheswing.”

“Myparents’househasaporchswing.Theyusedtositoniteverynight.Theymadeusstayinside

sotheycouldhavethattimealone.IalwayssaidI’dhaveaporchswingatmyhouse,too,somywife
andIcouldswingeverynight.”

“Howaboutagirlfriendswingingwithyou?”
“Areyouapplyingforthepositionofmygirlfriend?Theinterviewprocessisprettyrigorous.”
“Ihavethejacketandringalready.SoIthinkIpassed.”
“Imightneedarefresheronthemouthtomouthpartofthetest.”
“Thatcouldbearranged.”
Iwalkovertohim,grabbinghimbuythelapels,andkissthehelloutofhim.Beforewebothlose

control, he pulls out that irritating new honorable side again. Scratch that, he’s always been
honorable,justnotwhenitcametousandabed.

“Grabyourpajamasandpickaroom.”
“Fine.Yougoonbacktoyourroom,andI’llpickmine.”
“Goodnight,Ains.”
Ijustsmileandblowhimakiss.I’vealreadypickedtheroomIwant,anditjustsohappensthathe’s

already sleeping in there. He told me yesterday that he wouldn’t play fair in trying to get me back.
Well,I’mnotgoingtoplayfairwhenitcomestogettinghimtomakelovetome.

IknowItoldhimearlierthatIwasn’tstaying,butseeinghimwithmyfriends,andthenwhathehad

donetothehouse,it’sjusttoomuchformetoignore.Everythinghedidforme,includinghavinga
partyhere,issowonderful.Idon’tcareanymoreaboutlookingweak,oreasy.Ijustwanttobewith
themanIlove.He’sworriedaboutmehavingregrets,butI’llonlyregrettonightifI’mnotwithhim.

***

Zack

I’mproudofmyselfformyself-control.Mybody’spissed,butIknowIdidtherightthing.Iwant

Ainsleytobesurewhensheclimbsbackintobedwithme.Knowingthatshecouldregretbeingwith
mewouldkillme.Ineedrelease,though,soIpushdownmybriefs,andtakemyselfinhand.

I’mstrokinghardwhenthedooropens.Ainsley’seyeswiden,butthenshelicksherlipsandgives

meadevilishsmile.

“Don’tstoponmyaccount.That’shot.”
“Wh-whatareyoudoinghere?”
Idon’ttakemyhandoffmycockbecauseI’mreallyclose,andIjustcan’tstop.Especiallywithher

watchingme.

“Youtoldmetopickaroom.Ipickthisone.”
“I’llgetoutinaminute.Ican’twalkrightnow.”
“Ididn’tsayIwantedyoutoleave.”
Sheuntiestherobeshe’swearing,andletsitfalloffhershoulders.Ohfuck.She’sgotonacorset

withgarterthingshangingdown.Andthat’sit.Nopanties,andthecorsetstopsbelowherbarebreasts.
Shelicksherfingersandthenrubsthemaroundhernipples.ThebedisbangingagainstthewallasI
fuckmyhand.

“You need some help with that big, hard cock of yours,” she tells me before walking over and

takingmeinhermouth.

She’sfuckingherselfwithherfingers,andsinceIwasalmosttherealready,thesightofittakesme

over.Icomehardinhermouth.Ican’ttakeit,seeingherwetpussyglisteningatmeasIcomedown.I
turnusoverandattackherwithmymouth.Ireplaceherfingerswithmineandworkheruntilshe’s
screaming.

“I’msorry,Ains.Itried.Ireallytriedtoresist.”
“TheonlythingI’mgoingtohaveaproblemwithtomorrowisyouapologizingformakingme

come.Nowshutupandtakemetoourbed.”

IlaughasIpickherupandcarryherthere.Wegetnosleepaswetakeeachotheroverandover

againallnight.

It’sagoodthingthenewcoachgaveusadayofftorelaxbecausethere’snowayIcouldperform

onthefieldafterperformingallnight.Mywoman’sinsatiable,andIwakeuptoherridingme.Igrab
herhipsandthrustintoheruntilwebothcomehard.

“Goodmorning.”
“It’sbetterthangood.Aren’tyousoreafterlastnight?It’sbeenweekssincewewentlikethat.”
“Alittle,butyouknowIcannevergetenoughofyou.”
“Idoknowthat.Doyouhaveanyplansfortoday?”
“Ihavetowork.JadeleavesonSaturdayforanewmission,andIhavetomakesureeverything’s

readyforher.”

AllofasuddenIrealizethatAinsleycouldbeleavingforamission.Iwouldn’tknowwhereshe

was,orifshewassafe.Thosethoughtsscaremeenoughtohavemesittingstraightupinbed.

“What’swrong,Zack?”
“Areyougoingonanothermissionsoon?”
Sheshakesherheadandlooksalittlesad.“Ican’t,Zack.”
“Whynot?Didthoseassholeshurtyouwhentheyhadyou?”
Ididn’tseeanymarksonherwhenIwasplayingwithherbodylastnight,andshedefinitelywasn’t

movingsloworlikeshewasinpain.Butmaybeit’sinternal.

“I’mnothurt.I’vejustbeenexposed.”
“Exposed?Theytookpicturesofyou?Iknowthey’reinjail,butI’llkillthem.”
“Calmdown.WhatImeantisthatthepresstookpicturesofus.”
OhGod.Ineverthoughtofthat.“I’msosorry.I’veruinedyourcareer.Ishouldn’thavekissedyou

aftermytouchdown.”

“You didn’t ruin my career. Jane and Reina said I can still go out on mini missions, and I’m

valuable enough behind my computer. And you damn well better kiss me when you make a
touchdownonSunday.Nottomentionattheballtomorrow.”

“I’mstillsorry.Notforthekissing,butforputtingyouinthepubliceye.”
“Wherever you are is where I’m going to be. If that’s in front of a camera, so be it. I had to

completethatmissionbecauseIdon’tbreakmypromises,butyoumeanmoretomethanmyjob.”

“Ifeelthesame.Iwon’tleaveifsomethinghappenstomycontracthere.”
“Nothing’shappeningtoyourcontract.Jacklovesyou.SodoI.”
“Iloveyou,too.Jack—well,Ilikehimalot—butIdon’tthinkhecouldpulloffthecorset.”
“Cometakeashowerwithme,andthenwecanhavesomebreakfastbeforeIgotowork.”
“I’mcoming.”
“Yes,youare.”
Wehaveaveryfunshowerthatwebothenjoy.Wemakebreakfasttogether,andIcanfinallyshow

her the backyard. She loves the waterfall swimming pool with the grotto, the large grassy area—
which is fake grass, but so good you can’t tell unless you know—the cabanas, and the outdoor
kitchen.Thegymismyprideandjoy,though,andwhenwewalkintothebuilding,Icantellsheloves
it,too.

“Igettoworkoutinherewithyou,right?”
“Anytimeyouwant.”
“Ican’tbelieveyouhadallofthisoutherewhenIcameover,andIdidn’tevenseeit.”
“Wewerealittlepreoccupiedthen.”
“Yes,wewere.CanIcomeoverafterworkoristhattooclingy?”
“Clingaway,babe.Iwantyoutomoveinassoonasyou’reready.”
“I’mreadynow.Ijusthavetogetmystuffpackedup.”
“Icoulddothattodayifyouwant.”
“Youdon’twanttorelaxonyourdayoff?”
“No.I’vehadamonthofSundaystorelax.”
“Thenyes,pleasepackupmythingsandbringthemhere.Youcanleavethedishesandstuff.Ijust

needmyclothesandpersonalstuff.”

“Isitokaytogointoyourworkroom?”
“Oh. Yeah. I mean, maybe don’t touch the computers, but you can carefully pack up my

collectibles.”

“I’llbesupercareful.Iappreciateyoutrustingmewiththem.”
“ItrustyouwitheverythingIhave.”
“Exceptyourcomputers.”
“I-Icouldtellyouhowtotakethemapart.”
“Iwaskidding,Ains.Iwouldn’ttouchthem.Iknowmylimitations.”
“Callmeifyouhaveanyproblemsorareunsureofanything.”
“Iwill.Havefunatwork.”
“Youknowmesowell.”
“Ido.”
Ispendthemorningpackingeverythingup.Itdoesn’ttaketoolongbecauseacoupleofthesecurity

guysoffertohelpout.Theytellmethey’llmissAinsley,butthey’rehappythatwe’retogether.They
also threaten me. I’m not sure there’s anyone left in this city who hasn’t threatened me. I like it,
though.Itjustshowshowmuchmygirlisloved.

Withtheextrahelp,I’mdonebyoneo’clock.AfteraquicktexttoStella,IheadtotheCorrigan&

Co.building.AlexsmilesatmeasIwalkinandthensendsmethroughtotheelevator.Conversations
stop again when I walk into the basement. I know they’re just looking out for their boss, but it’s
unnervingforallthesepeoplewhocouldwipeoutmybankaccountstobeglaringatme.

“What’sgoingonouthere?”sheasksasshewalksoutofheroffice.“Oh.Zack.Hi.”Shegiftsme

withabigsmilewhensheseesme.

“Hi.Igotdoneearly,andStellasaidyoudidn’thavelunchyet.SoIstoppedbytohavelunchwith

you,ifthat’sokay.”

“Yeah.Ofcourseit’sokay.Wecaneatinthecafeteria.Theyhaveeverykindoffoodimaginable.”
“Wow. You’re actually eating in the cafeteria and not just snacking at your desk? Is the world

ending?”

“ShutitJake.”
Jakewinksatmeandthenwalksover.Heholdshishandout,andIshakeit.“Scottsaysyou’regood

forher.Ithinkhe’sright.”

“I’mtryingreallyhardtobe.”
“Enoughwiththebromance,areweeating?”
“Yes,mylove,we’reeating.”
Weholdhandsaswewalkuptheelevatorandoutintothehall.Peoplecomeoutoftheirofficesas

theyseeuswalkingdownthehalltothecafeteria.Iftheyweren’tscaredofMatt,they’dprobablyhave
theirphonesout,too.He’ssuperprotectiveofthegirls,andeveryoneknowsit

Whenwewalkintothecafeteria,itgetsquietagain.UnlikeinAinsley’soffice,thissilenceismore

curiousthanhostile.

“They’rewonderingwhatyou’redoingwithme.”
“Whywouldtheywonderthat?”
“They…umm…wellmostofthepeoplewhoworkherethinkI’mjustaweirdnerd.”
“Seriously?”
“I’veheardthoseexactwordsusedtodescribeme.TheythinkIdon’tfitinsinceIdresslikeIdo

anddon’ttrytobeglamorous.”

Shepushesherglasseshigheruponhernose.It’ssocutewhenshedoesthat.Andsexy.Theidiots

whoworkhereneedarealitycheck.Igrabherintoapassionatekiss,dippingherdowninmyarms.
WhenIletherup,Iaddresstheworkerswiththeirmouthshangingopen.

“Ifuckherwhileshewearsherglasses,too.It’scrazyhot.Sexy,nerdygirlsarethebest.”
Ainsley’sbrightred,butshe’ssmilingatme.Igiveheranotherquickkissandthenpullhertowards

thefoodstations.Weloaduponeplatebeforesittingdownrightinthemiddleofthecafeteriawhere
the staring hasn’t stopped. We eat off our plate, tuning out everyone but each other as we flirt and
laugh.

Ashadowfallsoverthetablewhenwe’realmostdone.IlookupandseeMattstandingnexttome.

HesmilesatAinsley,andthenatme.

“I’vebeenwatchingthetwoofyou.He’sakeeper,LittleMouse.”
“Iknow,Matt.”
“Takegoodcareofher,Taylor.”
“Iwill.”
Henodsandwalksaway.Ipickupourplateandcups,andcarrythemtothedropoffarea.WhenI

walkbacktothetable,there’sayoungguytheretalkingtoAinsley.He’sgotacockyswagger,andI
cantellshe’stryingnottolaugh.

“What’sup,man?”
“IwasjustinvitingAinsleytoapartymyfriendsandIarethrowing.Youcancome,too.”
“Awwthat’ssweetofyoutoask,butwe’rebusy.”
“Youdon’tevenknowwhatdayitis.”
“No.ButIknowallofyouwereassholestomywomanbeforeIwalkedinheretoday.Whatwould

possiblymakeyouthinkwe’dhangoutwithyouafteryoutreatedherbadly?”

“Wedidn’tknowshewashot.”
“Hello.I’mrighthere.”
I smile at her before glaring back at him. “Your eyes aren’t working? Maybe you need glasses.

She’sabouttosetthisplaceonfirewithhowhotsheis,andifyoucan’tseethatwithoutmetelling
you, I don’t know how you got a job here. Because you’re obviously not the brightest bulb in the
box.”

“You’llbeahas-beeninafewyears.Soonerifyouhurtyourself.Whatwillyoudothen?”
“He’llusehisdegree,asshole.”
“Walkaway,dude.Thisconversationisgoingdownhillfast.”
“Scaredofme,Taylor?”
“Seriously?WhywouldIbescaredofyou?”
“Iknowkarate.”
Hemovesintoamartialartsposition,andIcan’tstopmyselffromlaughing.Icouldsnaphimlike

atwig.KnowingwhatIknownow,Ainsleyprobablycould,too.We’resavedfromitallwhenTegan
andStellawalkover.

“Overcompensatingagain,huh?”
“Ihavenothingtoovercompensatefor,Stella.”
“Webothknowbetter.”
“Youweren’tcomplainingwhilewewerefucking,Tegan.”
“IthinkIfellasleep.”
“Bitches.”
“Yep.Weare.Sadlywe’renottoodiscerningaboutwhowesleepwith.Caseinpoint—you.”God,I

loveStella.

“Yougoingforhimnext?”theassholeasksmotioningtome.
“Never.Hewouldn’thaveusanyway.He’sallaboutourgirlhere.Whichisexactlyhowitshould

be.Nowrunalongbeforehekicksyourass.”

Hetriestolooksmugashewalksoff,buthecan’tpullitoff.Ihugthetwogirlsandthankthemfor

theirsupport.TeganmakessureIknowthatwhenshesaidthey’dnevergoforme,itwasbecauseI’m
withAins,notbecauseshewastryingtoinsultme.Iassureherthatwe’reallgood.

IwalkAinsleybacktoheroffice,andkissherthoroughly,beforeheadingbacktothehouse.Ihave

everything unpacked when she gets home, and she shows me just how much she appreciates me.
Whileshe’swearingherglasses.

CHAPTER18

Ainsley

I’minmydressingroom,gettingreadyfortheballtonight.Zack’sinthebedroomandItoldhim

nottocomeinbecauseIwanttowowhim.Mydressiscrazy.StellaandIbothknewitwastheone
when we saw it on the runway a few months ago. It’s mostly white with a cool, square strapless
neckline.Atthewaistitstartstodeconstruct.Itlookslikeapaintingthat’sinpieceswithabigpink
flower,andleaves,inpiecesandlayerstothefloor.There’sasmalltrainintheback,too.

I’mdoingsomethingdifferenttonightbyleavingmostofmyhairdown.Ihaveitpulledbackwith

apinkrhinestoneheadbandsoit’ssleekinfrontwithcurlsrumblingovermyback.Icouldn’tfindany
jewelryIliked,butIthinkthedressisenoughwithoutjewelry.IwalkoutoftheroomandstopwhenI
seeZackstandingbythewindow.IsteadymyselfagainstthedoorsoIdon’tswoondowntothefloor.

Imustmakeasoundbecausehelooksoverandhismouthdropsopen.“Babe,youlook…Idon’t

evenknowifthere’sawordforhowgoodyoulook.”

“Youlookverynice,too.”
“Ihavesomethingforyou.Stellahelpedmefindit.”
“Ofcourseshedid.IthinkyoutwoarecloserthanherandIare.Andwe’rereallyclose.”
“You’renotupsetaboutthat,areyou?Webothjustloveyou,andshelikestohelpmespoilyou.”
“No,I’mnotmad.Iloveyouboth,too.AlthoughyouknowhowIfeelabouttoomuchspoiling.”
“Youcangobuymewhateveryouwanttobalanceitout.”
“Deal.Nowshowmewhatyou’vegot.”
He pulls a jewelry box out of his pocket. Inside are beautiful diamond rose earrings. They’re

perfectformydress.Ofcoursetheyare—Stellafoundthem.

“They’rebeautiful.”
“Ipickedthem.Stellafoundmeafewpairs,andIpickedthese.”
I know I look like a maniac with the smile lighting up my face, but I love that he picked them.

“They’reperfect.You’rethebestboyfriendagirlcouldeverhave.”

“Holdthatthoughtforacoupleofhours.”
“Crypticmuch?”
“Well,Iaminlovewithasecretagent.”
“True.”
It’saquickridetotheLouRuvobuilding.Wewalkintotheballroomholdinghands,andittakes

meamomenttobelievewhatI’mseeing.Atoneofthetablesringingthedanceflooraremyparents,
myfourbrothers,mysister-in-law,Sierra,andacouplewhoIassumetobeZack’sparents.

“Zack,whataretheydoinghere?”
“Helpingmesurpriseyou.”
“Ican’tbelieveyoudidthis.”
“Believeit.Iknowyoumissyourfamily,andIwantedyoutomeetmyparents.Weshouldprobably

goovertherebeforetheythinkwe’reignoringthem.”

“You’reright.Ilookokay,don’tI?Imean,Iwanttomakeagoodimpressiononyourparents.”

“You already have, babe. Both Si and I have told them how awesome you are. They can’t wait to

meetyou.”

Wewalkoverandareimmediatelyengulfedinhugsfromeveryone.Duringdinner,wealltalkand

gettoknowoneanother.MyparentsandbrothersareinlovewithZackwithinminutes,andIthinkhis
parentslikeme,too.SierraandIchatinbetweenthekissesZackkeepsgivingme.Everyonethinks
it’s cute that we eat from the same plate, and we both blush at that. It’s one thing for our friends to
comment,butwhenit’syourfamily,wellthat’sawholedifferentballgame.

MyfriendscomeovertosayhitomyparentsandmeetZack’s.WeallgetquietasJanetakesthe

stagetogiveherspeech.I’minaweofherandsoproudtobeworkingforher.

“Thankyouforallcomingheretonight.Itmeanssomuchtome,myfriendsontheboard,andthe

women who work for us that you would choose to support us tonight. As you know, one hundred
percentofyourdonationstonightwillgotowardshelpingushelpwomeninneed.I’mnotgoingto
giveabigspeech,asI’llbestoppingbyeverytabletothankyouallpersonally.

“I’dliketoinviteLasVegasLegionsrunningbackZacharyTaylorupherenow.Hehassomething

he’dliketosay.”

Zacksmilesatmeashegetsupandwalkstothestage.Janehugshimtightbeforehandinghimthe

microphone.Shewhisperssomethingtohim,andhenods.Whenheturnsaround,helooksstraightat
me.

“Goodeveningeveryone.I’mreallythankfulthatyou’reallheresupportingthisgreatfoundation.

ThewomanIloveworksforJane,soit’sgoodtoknowthatthankstoyourgenerousdonationsshe’ll
beabletosupportmewhenmyfootballcareerisover.”

Everyonelaughs,andhewaitsforthemtoquietdownagainbeforecontinuing.
“JanewaskindenoughtoletmedothisatherballbecauseshelovesAinsleyasmuchasIdo.Some

ofyouknowmygirl,knowthatshe’sbrilliant,beautiful,andthebestfriendanyonecouldeverhave.
Westartedoutasjustfriends.Iwantedmorethanthatfromthemomentwemet,butsheinsistedthat
beingfriendswasallshewouldofferme.IcanbepatientwhenIwantsomething,orsomeone,badly
enough,soIdecidedtowaitedforhertorealizethatweshouldbemore.Thatwasthebestdecision
I’veevermadeinmylife.

“Ourfriendshipturnedintosomuchmore,butwebothmadesomemistakesthatledtobumpsin

ourroadtoforever.We’vepavedoverthosebumps,andnowforever ’sbackonthetable.BeforeIdo
somethingstupidagain,Ineedtoaskheranimportantquestion.Sopleasejoinmeoverher,Ains.”

Oh my God. My family’s here. His family’s here. And all our friends are here. He’s going to

propose.IhurryovertohimasfastasIcaninthisbigdress.

“Yes.”
“Ididn’taskmyquestionyet,”hesayswiththesmilethatbelongsonlytomeonhisface.
“Ohsorry.Goahead.”
HedropstoonekneeasIstarttoshake.I’mgoingtocry.There’snowayI’mnotgoingtocry.He

seesitandkissesmyhandashetakesit,rubbinghisfingersovermypalmtotryandcalmmedown.

“Ainsley Martin, I love you more than anything or anyone in the world. You really are every

minuteofmyeveryday.Willyoupleasemarryme?”

“Yes.Icansaythatnow,right?”
“Yes,babe.Youcansaythatnow.”
Theballroomeruptsinapplauseasheopensupthejewelryboxinhishandtogetouttheringhe

picked.Asheslipstheglitteringdiamondonmyfinger,Inoticethatit’sshapedlikeafootball.Ibeam
athimashestandsup.Thenwe’rekissing,andhe’spickingmeuptotwirlmearoundasourfamily
andfriendssurroundus.

EPILOGUE

Faith

I’mhappyforAinsley.Zack’sagreatguy,andshedeservesthefairytale.JustbecauseIrealizethat,

doesn’t mean I want to see it. I don’t want to settle down, but a boyfriend would be nice. I’ve been
doing so many missions and pretend caterings lately that it’s made finding one impossible. I can’t
evenrememberthelasttimeIhadsex,andIreallyneedthatrelease.

“Notovertherecelebratingwiththehappycouple?”
Ilooknexttomeandseeagorgeousguywithshortblackhairanddarkbrowneyeslookingatme

with a cocky smile on his face. He looks a little familiar, but honestly so does everyone lately.
Between the missions and fake catering, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen the whole city in the last few
months.

“Icongratulatedthem.”
“Soyoucangetoutofherethen.”
“Withyou?”
“Yes,withme.I’vebeenwatchingyouallnight.”
“Stalkermuch?”
Ishouldbefreakedout,butI’malittleturnedon.He’shotandhewantsme.I’veneverbeenaone

nightstandgirl,likesomeofmyfriends,butIwanttoleavewithhim.Iwanttodosomethingwild
andfun,justforme.Besides,it’snotlikeIcouldn’ttakehimdownifitcametothat.

“Interestedisamoreappropriateword.Iwanttogetyououtofthattightbluedressandwrapthat

sexylonghairofyoursaroundmyhandwhileIfuckyouhard.”

Oh.He’soneofthem.Dammit.I’mnotcuttingmyhairjustbecausetheweirdoeslikeit.“I’mnot

intoguyswithahairfetish.Sothanksbutnothanks.”

Istarttomove,butheplaceshishandonmyarm.“Idon’thaveahairfetish.Inormallycouldcare

lesswhatawoman’shairlookslike.Yourhairisjustpartofwhatintriguesmeaboutyou.Idowantto
pullit,though.Iwon’tlie.”

“WhatdoIgettopullinreturn?”
“Anythingyouwant.I’mhappytobeyourplaything.”
“Let’sgetoutofherebeforeIchangemymind.”

***

Gavin

Idon’tevenknowhername,butIheardsomeonesayshewasinchargeofthemenutonight.She

thinksherhairturnsmeon?Iwonderhowshe’dfeelifsheknewherfoodisevensexiertome.I’d
noticed her before I ate. Who wouldn’t? She’s got on one of those sexy bandage style dresses in a
brightblue.Itgoesallthewaytothefloor,butit’ssexyashell.It’sgotadeepvneckwithacoupleof
thestrapscrossingoverthetop.I’vebeenitchingtogetmyhandsinsidethatvtocaresshersmallbut
perfectlookingbreasts.

Then there’s the hair. I mean what I said about not having a fetish, but damn if I couldn’t be

persuadedtotakeuponeafterseeinghers.It’sbrownwithafewredandblondehighlightsthatfallsin
layerstoherwaist.Idon’tjustwantitwrappedaroundmyhands,Ialsowanttofeelitwhippingmy
chestassheridesme.

Whenyougetpastherbodyandhair,herfaceisnolessremarkable.Brownalmond-shapedeyes,a

cutelittlenose,highcheekbones,andlushlipscombinetomakeheroneofthemoststunningwomen
I’veeverseen.AndI’veseenmyfairshare.

Butit’sherfoodthatmademeboldenoughtoapproachher.Hermenufortonightwasdecadent,

butsimple.Everythingsheusedwasorganic,butshehiditwellenoughthatthesnobswouldn’tturn
uptheirnose.IwasinheavenfromthefirstbiteItook.IknewIhadtohaveher.

I’m being reckless tonight, and I know it. I may have seen quite a few women in my life, but I

haven’tbeddedasmanyasIcouldhave.IhavetobeselectiveaboutwhoIchoose,andfordating,I
don’tnormallyhaveachoice.Mymother,orsomeonefromherstaff,choosesforme.Shewouldkill
meifsheknewIwasfollowingsomeonehomewithoutevenknowinghername.Idon’tcare.Iwant
thiswoman,andforonceI’mgoingtodosomethingformyself.

***

Faith

I shouldn’t be bringing him back to my place, but I know I’ll be safe here, so this is where I’m

takinghim.Istopattheguardgatetolethimcatchupandtellthemtolethimin.Iparkinmyspotand
waitforhimattheelevator.Hereachesformyhand,andIlethimtakeit.Wewalkacrossthelobby
likethat,holdinghands.Theguysinthelobbyraisetheireyebrows,butIsmileatthemandtheyrelax.

We take the interior elevator to my floor. I start getting nervous the second we step out. My

apartment’snotexactlynormal,soIhopehedoesn’tfreakoutandrun.Iopenmydoorandpullhim
insideafterme.

“Whoa.”Istiffen.“Thisisamazing.”
Ispintofacehim.“Youlikeit?”
“What’s not to love about this kitchen? I wish my place had a kitchen taking up two-thirds of the

livingspace.”

“Youliketocook?”
“Ilovetocook.”
Ireachforhimandcrushmylipstohis.Westumblealittle,buthesteadiesus.Hestartspullingme

towardsthegiantislandinthemiddleoftheroom,andIlethim.He’skissingandbitingmyneckasI
pullhisjacketoffandstartworkingonhistie.

“Wedon’tneedourclothesoffthistime.Ijustneedtobeinsideofyou.”
“Yes.”OhGod,yes.Iwantithereinmykitchen.
He turns me around and pushes my dress up to my hips. He runs his hands over my ass before

tearingmythongoff.IbendovertheislandandbracemyselfasIhearhispantsdroptothefloorand
thenthatunmistakablesoundoffoilbeingrippedopen.

“Areyouready,chef?”
“Yes.”
HeentersmeinonethrustandIcryoutfromhowgooditfeels.“Youlikeit.”
“Ido.”
Ifeelhimtwistmyhairaroundhishandanditstingsalittlewhenhetugsonit.Hedoesn’tpullso

hardthatithurtsme,justenoughtoincreasethepleasureI’mfeeling.

“Touchyourself.Idon’tknowhowlongIcanwaitforyou.”
Idoaswhathecommandsmeto,rubbingcirclesaroundmyclit.Hestartssuckingandbitingmy

neckagain,andIarchbackintohimasIcome.Hefollowsprettyquicklyafterme.Westandtherefor
amomentaswebothtrytocatchourbreath.

“Ihopeyouhavemorecondoms,becauseIobviouslydidn’tdoagoodjobthattime.”
“Itwasgreat.Ipromise.”
“Youdidn’tscream.”
“Oh.Idon’tdothat.Scream,Imean.”
“Youwillforme.”
“Youcantrytomakeme,butIpromiseyou,I’mnotawomanwholosescontrol.”
“Wannabet?”
“Sure.”
Heturnsmearoundandhasmeleanbackasheputshishandsinsidethetopofmydress.Igaspas

hepinchesmynipples.“Losercooksbreakfastinthemorning.”

InodbecauseifIopenmymouth,I’mscreaming.GoodthingIlovetocookbreakfast.

***

Gavin

She screamed last night. More than once. It was hands down the best night of my life, and even

thoughIwon,I’mcookingbreakfast.WhenIwokeupwithherinmyarms,IknewIwasintrouble.I
couldn’tjustwalkoutonher.

“IwassupposedtocooksinceIlostthebet.”
“Iknow,butIwantedtocookforyou.”
“Nooneevercooksforme,sothankyou.”
“You’reverywelcome.”
“I’mFaith,bytheway.”
“Gavin,”Itellher,wishingthatItoldhersoonersoshewould’vescreamedmynameasshecame.

Toolateforthatnow.

“Idon’tnormallydo…this…soI’mnotsurehowthisworks.”
“Wehaveanicebreakfasttogether,fuckagainifyouwant,andthenIgoonmyway.”
“Doyouwanttoseemeagain?”
“Yes.ButIcan’t.”
“Oh…?Oh!You’renotmarriedareyou?Pleasetellmeyou’renotmarried.”
“I’mnotmarried,Faith.AndIdon’thaveagirlfriend.I’mnotthetypeofguywhowouldsleepwith

anotherwomanwhileIwaswithsomeoneelse.Mylife’sjustcomplicated,andasmuchasIlikeyou,
thishastojustbeaone-timething.”

“Okay.Well,thanksforbreakfast.”
WeeatinsilenceandIhateit.Wehadsomuchfunlastnight,andnowit’sjustawkward.There’s

nothing I can do about it, though. A chef wouldn’t be up to my mother ’s standards and until I can
untangle myself from her, I’m stuck. Once we finish eating, I get dressed and kiss her softly at the
doorbeforeleaving.

***

Faith

I’mwithmymentor,Cyndi,waitingforthewomanIneedtoimpressformynextmission.She’sa

senator who likes to spend her off time here in Vegas. Winter recess was just announced, so she’s
gettingherhouseready.WepaidhernormalcheftoquitsoIcantakeoverandworkundercoverin
herhouse.

Eithershe,orsomeonewhoworksforher,ispassingalongstatesecretstothehighestbidder.This

wasalastminutething,soIwasn’tabletogooverherfile.Ionlyknowthatshe’sveryconservative,
andrunsherhouse—andherfamily—withanironfist.Funtimesaheadforme.

She’sbeenafterEvan’ssupportforyears.She’llnevergetit,butCyndiisusingittobaitherinto

hiring her favorite chef. Me. I’ve prepared one of my favorite dishes, and I hope she likes it well
enoughtohireme.

While we wait, I think about Gavin. It’s been two weeks since we were together, but I can’t stop

thinkingabouthim,andwhatwedid.Iwantarepeat,andI’vehadtostopmyselffromaskingAinsley
tofindhim,onmorethanoneoccasion.

“Sorry we’re late. My son was being difficult this morning. I’m sure you understand that, Cyndi.

Yourfamilyhadsomelittlescandalafewyearsago,didn’tthey?”

“My granddaughter ’s marriage wasn’t a scandal, it was a blessing. We’re not here to talk about

family,though.Faithhaspreparedsomethingwonderfulforyou.”

“There’snoneedforthat.Mysonwillbetheonedoingmostoftheactualcooking.”
“Yoursoncooks?”Cyndiasks.Thiscoulddefinitelybeaproblem.
“Yes, but I have to keep up appearances, so I hire a fake chef. I mean, how would it look for

everyonetoknowmysonisaworld-classchefwhodoesthecookingwhenweentertain?Ifhe’sout
withasuitablegirl,orhasotherplans,thechefcanfillin.Butnoonecooksbetterthanmyson.”

“I’msureFaithcouldhandlethat.”
Thesenatorlooksatmethen.“AreyouAsian,dear?”
“I’mpartChinese,yes.”
“Idon’twantfriedriceeverynightyoucook.”
“That’senough,Mother.She’shired.”
Mybreathcatchesinmythroatasweallturntohim.I’drecognizethatvoiceanywhere.Gavinis

thesenator ’sson,andI’minbiggertroublethanIimagined.

ReadmoreaboutFaith&Gavinin

DevouringtheSecret,outFebruary2015!

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Gabi, you said I was lame if I didn’t write anything after finishing The Griffin Brothers, so I

thoughtupthisnewseries.Thanksforkeepingmeontask,andremindingmetoeat.Iloveyou.

Dominique, you love and support me, even when I’m embarrassing you. Thanks for being

amazing,andlettingmeloveyourightback!

TeraChildsisthebestsupportsystemapersoncouldeverwantorneed.Yourencouragementhas

madeallthedifferencetome!

TracyWolff—IhavenowordsforhowmuchIloveyou.Thanksfornotonlybeingagreatfriend,

butaninspirationaswell!

TheladieswhotheSocietyfoundersarenamedfor:
JaneChilds—anaweinspiringwoman,whoIamluckytocallmyfriend.
CyndiPorter—oneofthemostcompassionate,andbeautifulpeopleIknow.
MalloryDaybell—we’vebeenfriendsalongtime,anditjustkeepsgettingbetterandbetter.Thanks

forbetareadingmybooksandnotkillingmebecauseyouwantMatt&Reina’sstoryNOW!

HelenWilliams—youstartedoutasjustmy(awesome)coverdesigner,andwe’vebecomefriends.

I’msogladtoknowyou,andsogratefulthatyoushareyouramazingtalentwithme!

Maggiewasn’tnamedafteranyone,althoughmymiddlenameisMargaretha.Ican’timaginebeing

themomtothoseGriffinboys,especiallywhenIwrotesomeofthosescenes,sowe’lljustleaveitat
that!

ReneeKennedy,Iloveyouandthanksfortalkingupmybookstoeveryone!
MelissaShank,wehaven’tknowneachotherlong,butIloveyouandappreciateallthesupportyou

throwmyway!

Jessica Hinners, your input on the books is always just what I need. Sometimes, I can’t make it

work exactly how you want, but you always have the readers in mind when you help me enhance a
scene.Itrulyappreciateyou!

AshleighRobertscreatedtheAMAZINGcrestyouseeinthefrontofthebook.Thecolorversion

willbeonlotsofswag.Thanksforbringingmyvisiontolife,andbeingacoollady!

JesseGordon,youknowIappreciatehowwellyoutakecareofmybooks.Youareaformatting

god!

AllyMurphy,thanksforfixingmycommasandsuch.Iwouldbelostwithoutyou!
LisaDessandSarahVela,who’vesupportedmefromthestart.Thanksforallthelove(inperson

andonyourblog).

To everyone else who has been there through this journey, and continues to help me grow as a

writer—thanksforeverything!

And of course to my fans. I love to know that the books mean something to you, and that my

charactershavetouchedyouinsomeway.Ican’tthankyouenough!

ABOUTTHEAUTHOR

CrystalPerkinshasalwaysbeenabigreader,butsheneverthoughtshewouldwriteherownbook,
untilshedid.ShelivesinLasVegas,whereyoucanfindherrunningauthoreventsandsellingbooks
atconventionswhensheisn’treading,buyingtoomanySherlockt-shirtsonlineorfindingaplaceto
putallofherPop!figurines.Amacandcheeseconnoisseur,shetravelsthecountrylookingforthe
perfect version, while attending book conventions and signings as a cover for her research. The
GriffinBrothersseriesareallInternationalBestSellers,andshe’sthankfultothereaderswhomade
thathappen!

Findherhere:

www.crystalperkinsauthor.com

facebook.com/crystalperkinsauthor

@wondermomlv

crystal@crystalperkinsauthor.com

Document Outline

About Fielding Her SECRET
Other books by Crystal Perkins
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Epilogue
Acknowledgements
About the Author

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