Sue Brown Tumbling Blindly

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A Total-E-Bound Publication

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Tumbling Blindly

ISBN # 978-1-78184-215-7

©Copyright Sue Brown 2013

Cover Art by Posh Gosh ©Copyright January 2013

Edited by Rebecca Douglas

Total-E-Bound Publishing

This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination

and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or

places is purely coincidental.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form,

whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of

the publisher, Total-E-Bound Publishing.

Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Total-E-Bound

Publishing. Unauthorised or restricted acts in relation to this publication may result in civil

proceedings and/or criminal prosecution.

The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs

and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator

of the artwork.

Published in 2013 by Total-E-Bound Publishing, Think Tank, Ruston Way, Lincoln, LN6 7FL,

United Kingdom.

Warning:

This book contains sexually explicit content which is only suitable for mature readers. This

story has a heat rating of Total-e-burning and a sexometer of 1.

This story contains 63 pages, additionally there is also a free excerpt at the end of the book

containing 3 pages.

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The Arches

TUMBLING BLINDLY

Sue Brown

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Book one in The Arches Series

Dumped by his partner, Matt isn’t looking for love. Once he meets Gabe at the gym, he finds a friend

as well as a lover.

After he is dumped by Milo, his long-term partner, Matt retreats to his bed, only to be scared

out of his wits by two policemen breaking into his house, checking to see if he is still alive

after being alerted by a nosy neighbour.

The last thing he expects is to meet one of the policemen a few months later at his local gym.

Gabe makes it obvious that he is attracted to Matt, but Matt is still getting over his break-up.

To his surprise, Gabe isn’t deterred by Matt’s reluctance, and promises to be friends until

Matt is ready for more.

Then Matt’s world is turned upside down by Milo’s return, begging a bed for one night. One

night turns into a week and Milo doesn’t move off the sofa. Although Matt still has feelings

for Milo, he realises he also has feelings for Gabe, who is more than a friend, and waits

patiently to be a lover.

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Dedication

To my British friends, S.A. Meade, Lisa Worrall, R.J. Scott and Meredith Russell. Ladies, you

keep me sane.

Trademarks Acknowledgement

The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following

wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction:

Bart Simpson: Matt Groening, Fox Broadcasting Company

Newsnight: BBC News

BBC Two: British Broadcasting Corporation

Gollum: J.R.R. Tolkien

Oscar: Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences

Richard & Judy: Cactus TV

Judge Judy: CBS Television Studios

iPod: Apple, Inc

Lightsaber: Star Wars, George Lucas

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6

Chapter One




Milo left on a Tuesday. Matt knew this because Tuesday was rubbish collection day and

he watched Milo dump a black plastic sack by the wheelie bin on the way out. The dustmen
left it there when they collected the rubbish. It wasn’t in the bin, see, and they never took
anything that wasn’t in the bin.

Matt gazed out of the window at the dustmen, unsurprised to see them ignore the bag

sitting forlornly by the gate. Blinking hard against the tears, Matt thought about going out to
beg the dustmen to take it, but he knew what a state he looked—puffy, blood-shot eyes and
unwashed hair sticking up every which way. He couldn’t face any of his neighbours catching
sight of the usually urbane Matthew Collins looking so wrecked. It wouldn’t be hard to put
two and two together. Milo hadn’t exactly gone quietly. A small smile curved Matt’s lips
even in the midst of his grief as he thought of Milo’s dramatic exit out of his life, their two-
year relationship, and his house. He was surprised the gate was still on its hinges.

The dustcart trundled farther down the road, blocking the entrance to old Mr Jones’

behemoth of a house. It was the largest house in the road, at least seven bedrooms, and a
complete waste of land that could be developed for social housing. At least that was what the
council was supposed to have said, according to Matt’s neighbour, Mrs Harris. Milo had told
him that the last time the council had gone to visit Mr Jones, the hapless official had been met
with a primed and loaded urine bottle. Tears filled Matt’s eyes again as he remembered the
glee in Milo’s face as he’d told Matt about Mr Jones’ threats, then had twirled Matt around in
some sort of mock tango. Milo was always pleased when he heard someone getting one over
authority.

Matt looked out of the window again. The black sack was still there. He knew he’d have

to go and retrieve it at some point before the old biddy at number forty-four started
complaining. Matt slumped back into the settee. It could wait. Everything could wait. He was
too fucking tired to move.

* * * *

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7


The black sack stayed outside the gate next to the wheelie bin for five days. Matt stayed

in his bed for five days, next to his picture of the two of them, arms around each other, at last
year’s uni Christmas party. Milo was wearing a stupid hat and had a matching expression
whilst Matt just grinned into the camera, happy and relaxed.

When did happy and relaxed turn into tense and angry? Matt tried to pinpoint when it

had all gone wrong. Uni had been an absolute blast. They’d met at the end of the first year.
Matt had been doing business studies and Milo, history and politics. Within an hour of
meeting, Milo had been giving Matt a blow job in the student union toilets, then bitching all
evening about the state of his jeans. Yeah, Matt wouldn’t have knelt on that floor. Things had
started to go wrong when they’d left uni and had tried to find work in the real world. Matt
had found a job as an administrator in a pensions consultancy. The money wasn’t brilliant
but the firm had promised a good training programme and increased pay. Milo had scoffed
at paper-pushing and training. He wanted to work in politics as a lobbyist. It didn’t seem to
occur to him that it would be a good idea to find any job while he searched for his dream
career, and the situation at home had grown tense as they’d tried to manage on Matt’s pay.

Fresh tears leaked into the sheets as Matt thought about the arguments, where he’d

complained that Milo was sitting on his arse all day instead of looking for a job. Perhaps he
should have been more understanding.

There was a knock at the front door. Matt ignored it as he had ignored all the other

knocks and phone calls. He hadn’t moved from the bed except to pee and get a drink of
water. He wasn’t hungry, and he didn’t want to talk to anyone. He’d phoned in sick on the
first day claiming laryngitis—his throat so raw from crying it hadn’t been hard to fake. What
day was it? Matt frowned, trying to remember. Friday? No, it was Saturday. He’d have to go
back to work on Monday…maybe.

The knock turned into pounding. Matt hid under the covers. If they couldn’t see him,

hopefully they’d go away. There was something wrong in that logic somewhere but he was
damned if he could see what it was. After a minute the noise stopped. Matt breathed a sigh
of relief and settled back down. He wanted to sleep but all he seemed able to manage were
short dozes, with long hours watching the clock go around.

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8

He started when he heard voices in his hallway. Looking about frantically, he couldn’t

see anything to use as a weapon to defend himself. Matt clutched the covers, waiting to see
who had broken into his home.

“It’s clear here. Try the bedroom.”
“It stinks worse than your shoes in here. Jesus!”
Matt peeked out from under his duvet to see two policemen enter his bedroom, their

hats in hand. They looked as surprised to see him as he was them.

The first policeman, a short, young guy, wrinkled his nose. “Matthew Collins?” He was

the one who had made the comment about the smell.

“Ye…” Matt coughed. He hadn’t spoken in days and his throat was completely closed

up. “Yes. I’m Matt Collins. What are you doing in my flat?”

The first policeman frowned at him. “I’m PC Murphy and this is PC West. Are you all

right, sir? You didn’t answer the door.”

“Th…that was you banging the door down?”
Both policemen nodded, then the other one, an older man with silver hair, spoke. “Are

you ill, Mr Collins? Your neighbour Mrs Morris, at number forty-four, was worried about
you. She hadn’t seen you for days.”

“She was more worried that I hadn’t brought the bin in,” Matthew snapped.
The two men exchanged glances, confirming Matthew’s suspicions.
“You can tell the old bag…my neighbour…that I’m fine. I’m sorry to have wasted your

time.” It was difficult to have some dignity when he was under a Bart Simpson duvet.

Another significant glance and the older one said gently, “Do you want us to call

anyone?”

Matthew huffed out a breath. “I don’t need a babysitter. I just want to be left alone.”
The older policemen looked doubtful but he nodded once, saying, “Okay, sir, we’ll go

now, if you’re sure we can’t help you. We’ve put the bin just inside the gate.”

“Thanks.” Matthew didn’t look them in the eye, embarrassed at being so vulnerable.
He was relieved to see them leave without another word. Closing his eyes, Matt tried to

calm down, more than a little freaked. He supposed he ought to be grateful. He could have
been lying here dead for weeks if it wasn’t for his nosy neighbour.

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9

The policeman was right about one thing though. It stank to high heaven in his

bedroom. He’d get up and have a shower at some point. Matt rolled over onto his stomach
and closed his eyes. The shower could wait.

* * * *


Tuesday night had always been Milo’s night to ‘do his own thing’. The whole time they

had been together, Milo had insisted that Tuesday night had been sacrosanct, and no plans
could be made which involved the two of them. He had also never told Matt what he had
done on a Tuesday night.

That had left Matt at a loose end. He had usually ended up going to the local gym,

finding a treadmill in the corner and pounding out 10k, followed by a sauna. The kebab shop
no longer bothered to ask his order. He’d come back home with a large shish kebab and
would watch Newsnight morosely on BBC Two. Matt wasn’t sure if you could actually watch
TV morosely, but he’d attempted it.

So this had been his pattern on Tuesday nights, week in, week out, for the whole of his

relationship with Milo.

Now that Milo had left, there was no reason to go to the gym anymore. He hated the

bloody thing anyway. Sometimes, it was more like a meat market than a place to get fit. The
first gym Matt had found, he had resorted to going on the men-only night because he had
quickly become uncomfortable with being hit on by women and then having to let them
down gently. He’d watch the disbelief cross their faces quickly followed by disappointment.
If one more woman thought they could ‘change’ him with the power of their tits, he’d barf.
Then he had found The Arches, a gym for gay men. It was full of men with muscles that Matt
could—and did—only dream about.

Even though Milo had gone, Matt still continued with his Tuesday visits to the gym. He

still hated every second of it, but it gave him something to do other than sitting alone in his
flat staring at photos of happier times. He started going on Thursday nights as well, because
he could stop off on his way home from work and get on his favourite machine—the one in
the corner—without having to wait for it. Apparently people preferred to go late-night
shopping on Thursday nights.

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10

Tonight, he was feeling particularly pleased with himself for running twenty kilometres

without breaking into a sweat. Not collapsing when he got off the treadmill was an added
bonus. Matt looked up to see a man with silver hair waiting patiently for his turn on the
machine.

“Oh, sorry. I’ve finished with it,” he said, not sure why he was apologising.
“No worries.” The man waved away his apology then frowned at him. “I’m sure we’ve

met.”

Matt furrowed his brow as he looked at the guy. Then really looked at him. Not that

tall, maybe five-foot-ten, a smidge shorter than Matt himself. The man was definitely older
than Matt but silver hair could be deceiving, and the face and hair didn’t match up well
enough to define his age.

“Mr Collins?” the man asked hesitantly.
“Yeah,” Matthew agreed, wary now. He wasn’t keen on being identified by a complete

stranger.

“I’m Gabe West. PC West. We…er…got called to your house by a concerned neighbour

a couple of months back.”

Oh. Ohhh. Matt flushed. That was a visit he’d been hoping to forget. “I remember,” he

said. Now he wanted to run away as fast as his shaky legs could take him.

“You’re looking better,” the policeman said.
“I’m fine. Look, I’ve got to go.” Matt was edging towards the door.
PC West gave him a knowing look. “I understand. My job has that effect on most

people.”

Matt realised he was coming over as a complete arse. “I’m sorry. You just got me on a

bad day. My…er…partner had just left me, and I was feeling sorry for myself.”

“Your neighbour said. She was very keen to inform us of anything that might be

pertinent to an investigation when we found your dead body,” PC West informed him.

Matt’s eyes widened, then he realised the policeman was taking the mick. “Nosy old

bat,” he said, grinning a little.

“God, yes. It took us twenty minutes just to get away from her. She told us where you

kept your spare key by the way.” PC West’s lips twitched as he watched the horrified
expression pass over Matt’s face.

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11

“How the hell did she know where I keep my key?”
“Women like that know everything, including what colour boxers you’ve got on.”
Matt thought frantically. Even he didn’t remember what colour boxers he was wearing.

“That’s scary.” He couldn’t repress a shudder.

The policeman nodded. “Tell me about it. Of course, they’re useful in my job. There’s

one in every road, twitching the curtains every time you make a move.”

“I bet you know them all. You probably have tea with them all the time. Butter them up

so they spill all the gossip,” Matt accused.

“You know it!”
The two men laughed together, Matt noticing how the policeman’s eyes sparkled when

he wasn’t being ‘official’.

“Are you using the treadmill?”
Matt looked up to see an extremely short man glaring at them. He didn’t know what

the bloke’s beef was, but Matt didn’t want any trouble. “I’ve finished. PC West…?”

The newcomer did a double take at Matt’s use of status and backed away a couple of

steps, his expression changing to something less aggressive. The policeman rolled his eyes.

“You go ahead,” he said, “I think I need a shower now.”
The man nodded, muscling between them to get at the machine.
“Jesus,” Matt said, “you’d think I’d stolen his precious.”
“Myyyy precioussss,” PC West hissed in a remarkably accurate imitation of Gollum.
“He’s welcome to it. I need a shower.” Matt laughed as he headed towards the locker

room.

“Oh good,” the policeman said blandly. “I was dreading having to tell you that you

stink—again.”

Matt almost tripped over his feet at the gibe. “PC West…”
“Call me Gabe. I’m off-duty and telling everyone I’m a police officer either makes them

want to punch me or run away.”

“Gabe,” Matt repeated. “I can see why they’d want to punch you if you go around

telling people they stink.”

“Normally I tell people they’re nicked. For some reason, telling people they stink is an

abuse of their rights, even if they are olfactory-challenged.”

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12

Matt tried not to flinch when Gabe laid a hand on the small of his back to steer him

around some mats left untidily in their pathway, but he couldn’t have been entirely
successful because Gabe’s hand was removed immediately, leaving the memory of his
imprint behind.

The men’s showers were empty when they entered the room. Matt usually waited until

he got home before he bothered showering, but for some reason he wanted to prove to Gabe
that there were times when he didn’t smell like the arse end of a donkey.

The showers were communal and Matt had always felt uncomfortable showering in

front of other naked guys. Not that he minded the view. Not at all. It was just that bare skin,
bubbles… Okay, yeah, Matt liked soapy guys and sometimes it was hard to keep a tight rein
on his dick. Trying hard not to look at Gabe as he banged the button for the shower, Matt
distracted himself by reciting his eight times table. Now was so not the time to show his
appreciation for the male form.

Closing his eyes, Matt deliberately let his muscles relax as the hot water pounded over

him. Behind him he could hear a snick of a bottle as Gabe washed himself. Matt forced
himself not to turn and look. Don’t look. Don’t look.

“I’m gay as well.”
Matt’s head shot up, and he stared at Gabe, eyes blinking rapidly as water ran into

them. “You’re what?” Well, of course he is, he’s at a gay gym.

“Gay,” Gabe said, calmly washing his chest. “Queer, homosexual. Whatever. Not out, of

course. I’ve got more sense than to come out at work. Some of my colleagues haven’t made it
past the Neanderthal stage. I come here to work out the frustration.”

“You get hassled?” Matt asked, trying to fix his eyes on Gabe’s face, and not on his

body. It hadn’t taken more than a couple of seconds to notice that the silver hair covered the
rest of him, there was a tattoo on Gabe’s back that he’d like to explore in more detail, and
that he was nicely hung.

“I don’t. Not out, remember? But some of my more open colleagues do. The

homophobia is more covert now, of course. No one can be seen to be a bigot, but it’s still
there. Some of them haven’t left the Seventies yet.”

“That must be”—Matt sought to tread carefully—“difficult for you.”
Gabe shrugged. “You get used to it. Are you out at work?”

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13

“No,” Matt admitted. “I’m still the new guy and no one has really asked. Once they

found out I wasn’t interested in football the men lost interest, and when they found out I was
attached the women lost interest.”

“But you’re not.”
Matt frowned. “Not what?”
“Attached.”
That hurt like someone was drilling a hole in his head. “I was when they asked the

question,” he said quietly.

Gabe laid a hand on his arm. “I’m sorry, Matt. That was thoughtless.”
He wanted to say it didn’t matter, that he was over it, but that would be a lie. There was

still a great big Milo-shaped gaping wound in his heart.

A noise outside the room made them both look up. Gabe squeezed his arm and stepped

back to his own shower. Matt washed himself quickly and reached for his towel.

“I’m glad you’re back on your feet,” Gabe said.
Matt attempted a smile. It was more of a twitch, but it was an attempt. “Me too. See you

around, Gabe.”

Reaching for his own towel, Gabe gave Matt a speculative look. “Is it too soon to ask

you out for a drink?”

“Yeah, sorry.” Matt smiled at him regretfully. He couldn’t deny he was attracted to

Gabe. But it was far too soon to think about dating.

Gabe nodded. “Shame, but I understand. I’ll see you around, then.”
“I’ll be here next week,” Matt said slowly. He was rewarded with a large grin spreading

over Gabe’s face.

“So I’m down but not out?”
Matt nodded.
“See you next week, then. It’s dependent on my shifts but if I can, I’ll be here.”
“I’m here Tuesday and Thursday evenings,” Matt told him.
Gabe had a look of concentration on his face. “I know I’m working Tuesday evening but

I should be free Thursday.”

They walked together towards the lockers.

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“I don’t remember seeing you around before,” Matt said, “but I used to only come on a

Tuesday night.”

Gabe swiped the card over his locker. “I always cover Tuesday night so that I can have

Tuesday morning off for an art class.”

“Oh? What are you learning?”
Gabe looked vaguely embarrassed. “Actually I’m teaching sculpture at the local

prison.”

“Wow! That’s…” Matt was taken aback. “That’s amazing, man. Good for you.”
“It’s nothing. They needed some extra tutors and I had the skills. My boss at the nick

said I could take Tuesday mornings off if I work Tuesday nights.”

“That makes it a long day for you,” Matt observed.
“Yeah, but it’s worth it. We’ve got some real talent in the class. I’m thinking that at the

end of the year I might be able to put on a display of some of their work.” Gabe’s head
emerged from the jumper and he grinned at Matt. “Of course, none of the artists will be able
to attend the exhibition.”

Matt returned his grin. “That’s reassuring—I think.”
Gabe just stared at him as if he were transfixed.
“What?” Matt frowned. “Is something wrong?”
“Have you seen you when you smile? There’s nothing wrong at all.”
Matt turned away, unable to deal with his compliment. Milo always used to tell him he

didn’t smile enough. He started doing up his shirt.

“Hey, come back to me.” This time Gabe didn’t touch him, but he did stand close

enough for Matt to feel the warmth from the shower radiating from him.

“Sorry. I’m still fragile.” He was a bloke. It was a stupid word to apply to a man, but it

was the most accurate.

“I can see that. I think you need a friend, Matt, and I’m volunteering for the role.”
Matt looked at him doubtfully. “You want to be my friend?”
Sounding mock-offended, Gabe said, “Don’t sound so suspicious. You have friends,

don’t you?”

“Yeah, but they don’t usually declare their interest in me first.”

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15

Gabe made a scoffing sound. “You need to learn to trust people. I can keep my dick in

my pants while I get to know you.”

Matt’s head was in a whirl. Somehow they had gone from see you next week to I’m your

best friend. “I need to get home,” he muttered, bending down to find his shoes.

“I’ll walk you out.” Gabe slung his bag over his shoulder and waited for Matt to finish

putting on his shoes.

“Is there any point in me arguing?” Matt asked as he stood.
Gabe smirked. “None at all.”
They walked out of the locker room, Gabe shadowing Matt’s back. It was probably

ingrained in Gabe because of his job but Matt wondered if Gabe was a top in bed as well. He
had a feeling that Gabe was a top in everything he did. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.

As they left the gym, Gabe handed Matt a business card. “I’m not going to hassle you

but if you need me, don’t hesitate to ring. Otherwise I’ll see you next week.”

Matt absently twirled the card between his fingers as he watched Gabe walk off down

the road. The man even walked like a top, a purposeful stride that took him away from Matt
far too quickly. He looked down at the back of the card. ‘Call me!!!!!’ was written in large
bold letters.

A smile spread across Matt’s face as he slipped the card into the back pocket of his

jeans. Matt walked in the opposite direction to Gabe, hoping he’d see a bus waiting at the
stop. It was a forlorn hope, Matt was never that lucky. But as he rounded the corner, he saw
the familiar red vehicle trundling towards him. If it got caught at the lights he could leg it to
the bus stop in time. Someone must have been looking after Matt, because the lights changed
to red just as the bus slowed at the junction. Matt ran across the road, reaching the bus stop
just in time. He wasn’t even panting too much when he got on and, miracles of miracles, he
found a seat.

Matt caught sight of his reflection in the mirror. For the first time in weeks he saw a grin

on his face instead of the abject misery that had moulded his features. Touching his back
pocket, Matt checked the business card was still there, relieved when he found the outline.
He wasn’t over the loss of Milo, not yet, but there was a glimmer of happiness on the
horizon.

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16

Chapter Two




His good mood lasted through the weekend. On Tuesday evening, as Matt threw his

keys into the pot shaped like a pig on the windowsill by the front door, his mobile phone
started to vibrate. He dug it out of his back pocket and answered it without looking at the
screen.

“Hello!” he said.
“You sound cheerful.”
Matt’s mood took a sky-dive through the floor. Why was it always fucking Tuesday?

“Milo. What do you want?”

“To see how you are.”
“I’m fine,” Matt said shortly. “Is that all?”
Of course it wasn’t all. It was never all. Milo wouldn’t have waited three months to ask

Matt how he felt.

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone, then Milo said, “Maybe I was a

bit hasty.”

Matt took the phone away from his ear and looked at it to see if it had just turned into a

snake. Nope, still a phone. Cautiously Matt replaced it. “What?”

“I shouldn’t have left so soon. I should have stayed and tried to work things out

between us.”

Collapsing on the sofa, Matt said, “Let me get this straight. After three months you’re

thinking that maybe leaving was a bad idea?”

“Yeah.”
“Bollocks,” Matt said, his words succinct. “What’s happened? Did Paul kick you out or

have you run out of money?”

He heard a bark of laughter. “Might have known I couldn’t fool you, mate. Yeah, Paul

threw me out last night. He said that if I was just going to welch off him I could bugger off.”

“Where did you sleep last night?”
“On a park bench. It was fucking freezing.”

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Matt drew his knees up to his chest. “You don’t really want to come back to me, do

you? You just want some money and somewhere to stay for the night.”

Milo’s voice changed, losing the humour. “I’m desperate, Matt. Please, just for a few

days until my money comes through. Please, baby, I need you.”

“Don’t ever call me that again. You lost that right when you walked out the door.” Matt

focused on his breathing to control the tears threatening to spring from his eyes. “You can
sleep on the couch tonight. I’ll give you some money to go home to your parents, but you
can’t stay here.”

“It’s half my place,” Milo blustered, but Matt was having none of it.
“And you never paid a penny towards the bills so you can fuck off with that attitude.”
“All right, baby… Matt. When can I come round?”
Matt sighed. “Where are you?”
“Outside the kebab shop. I was waiting for you there. I used the last of my money on a

doner and a can of beer.”

Matt had bypassed the kebab shop in favour of pizza, just for the hell of it. “Just come

here. You can have a shower and get changed into something of mine if you don’t have your
clothes.”

“See you in a minute.”
Matt disconnected the call without saying goodbye and dropped his phone on the floor.

Burying his face in his hands, Matt couldn’t help the low moan that passed his lips. It had
taken him weeks to be able to function again without Milo and now the bastard was waltzing
back into his life with more lies on his lips.

Just then the phone rang again. “What do you want?” he growled out nastily.
“Matt?” The voice on the other end of the line was hesitant, and it wasn’t Milo.
“Yes?”
“It’s Gabe. I was checking to see if you were all right.”
“I’m fine…no, not fine. Milo, my ex, wants to come back and stay because he got

thrown out by his new boyfriend and he told me that he wanted me but he doesn’t, he just
wants a place to sleep and…” Matt had to pause for a breath. “How did you get my phone
number?”

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“I’m a copper. It wasn’t hard to find.” Gabe obviously decided to dismiss that as

unimportant. “What do you mean Milo’s back? Back for good?” Matt noticed how pissed off
Gabe sounded.

“I said he could sleep on the sofa tonight and tomorrow he can go to his parents. I don’t

want him here.”

“Are you sure about that?” Gabe asked, and as distressed as he was Matt was struck by

how gently Gabe handled him. “You were devastated when he left. Are you sure you don’t
want to take him back?”

Matt sniffed, aware of how pathetic he sounded. “I don’t know what I want. My head’s

whirling around with so much shit.”

“I’m at work, dammit. Do you want me to come ’round afterwards?”
Sniffing again, Matt shook his head then realised Gabe couldn’t see him. “It would only

cause problems.”

Gabe sighed. “Call me tomorrow, Matt. I’ll be at home in the morning. Make sure you

do.”

“I’m fine, honest. You don’t have to worry.”
“Don’t give me that bollocks,” Gabe said. “Ring me in the morning on your way to

work.”

“You’ll be asleep,” Matt protested.
“Call me or I’ll be knocking the door down.”
Matt had no doubt Gabe would do exactly that. It made him smile. Who the hell was

this man?

“I promise.” A noise at the door made him sit up. “Milo’s here. I’ll call in the morning.”
“Make sure you do,” Gabe growled and disconnected the call.
Milo had left his key behind when he’d flounced out of the house, and after the incident

with the police Matt had made sure to move the spare key. When Matt opened the door, Milo
was scrabbling under the plant pot.

“Where’s the key?”
“I moved it,” Matt answered, letting Milo into the house.
“What the fuck for?” Milo demanded as he pushed past to go into the lounge.

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“Hello to you too,” Matt followed Milo, watching as his ex-partner made himself

comfortable on the settee in his favourite seat.

Milo grunted, taking a large mouthful of his kebab and swilling it down with lager.

Matt wandered off into the kitchen to get himself a beer. By the time he got back the kebab
was half-eaten.

“Is that the first thing you’ve eaten today?” he asked, settling himself in the large, saggy

armchair in the corner.

Milo nodded, still chewing. “I’m starving,” he mumbled around a mouthful of meat.
Matt looked away. It wasn’t a pleasant sight. Taking a swallow of his own beer, Matt sat

back and waited for Milo to finish.

“Football’s on tonight. The Chelsea game. Can we have it on?” Milo asked hopefully.
Anger coiled low in Matt’s belly. “This is not a fucking hotel, Milo. You left, remember?

You can’t just waltz back in here three months later and expect everything to be just the way
it was.”

“I’m only asking to watch footie, jeez. You’d think I was asking for a fuck. Is that the

problem? Do you want me to fuck you instead?” His voice dropped, low and seductive.

Matt just stared at him. “You’re a complete arsehole, do you know that? No, I don’t

want a fuck. I want you to piss off out of my life and never come back.”

“Three months ago you were crying and saying you’d die without me,” Milo pointed

out nastily.

Matt stared at his handsome face twisted in a nasty sneer and wondered what the hell

he’d seen in this man. “Three months ago I thought I’d die,” he admitted.

“So what changed?” Then Milo’s eyes widened and he snapped his fingers. “You’ve

met someone. You didn’t waste much time. Who is he?”

“It’s none of your business,” Matt snapped.
“So you have met someone.”
Matt sighed. “Watch the football, Milo. I’m going to bed.” It was early but he didn’t

care. He wasn’t in the mood for any of Milo’s headfucks.

“Sure you don’t want me to warm your bed?” Milo asked as he reached for the remote.
“Positive. Take a fucking shower. You stink!” Matt left the room to find the spare duvet

and pillows. “You can use the black towel. Do you need some fresh clothes?”

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“Yeah, mine are still at Paul’s.”
Matt came back into the room, balancing the bed clothes and some old clothes of Milo’s

that he’d found at the bottom of the washing basket.

“I wondered where that T-shirt had gone,” Milo exclaimed as he took the top off the

pile from Matt.

“Go and have a shower. I’ll see you in the morning.” Matt felt his cheeks heat. He

wasn’t about to tell Milo that he’d gone to bed wearing the T-shirt for three weeks straight.

“Yeah, and Matt?” Milo waited until Matt was looking at him. “Thanks, mate.”
Matt nodded, then left the room, the headache that had been threatening since Milo’s

phone call suddenly beating out its own tattoo in Matt’s skull.

* * * *


Matt blinked sleepily against the ray of autumn sunshine sneaking through the

curtains. He raised his head to look at the clock, flopping back onto his pillow with a groan
as he discovered that it was ten to seven, and he had only ten more minutes before the alarm
went off. Closing his eyes, Matt was determined to doze for the last few minutes before he
had to face the world, but instead of blissful sleep, Matt’s mind drifted to the glimpse he’d
had of Gabe in the shower, and the sight of his glistening wet body.

Matt could remember in intimate detail the way Gabe had smeared the soapy gel over

his torso, bubbles sliding down to become caught in the silver curls of hair above Gabe’s
cock. His shaft stirred at the thought of Gabe pushing him forcefully against the cold, tiled
wall of the locker room showers, not caring that someone might walk in and catch them, his
hard body pressing against Matt’s, trapping their aroused cocks between their bodies. Matt
slipped his hand around his shaft, an unguarded moan bursting loose from between his lips
as his hips thrust up reflexively. In Matt’s mind, Gabe grazed his teeth down the side of his
neck as he jacked their cocks together, his large, warm hand forming a tight sheath. Matt’s
toes curled as his hand mimicked the action of imaginary Gabe.

Matt grabbed the headboard with his free hand, needing to push against something.

His orgasm was there, almost within his grasp as he dreamt of Gabe’s thumb passing over
the head of his dick, digging into the slit before sweeping around the glans. He could feel

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Gabe’s shaft swelling against his and the rush of excitement and panic as they raced towards
their climaxes together, panting hard in each other’s ear.

Gabe whispered something, Matt didn’t catch the words, it didn’t matter because his

balls drew tighter, tighter, then he came with a shout of relief, echoed in reality as Matt
spurted over his own fingers, his orgasm as long and drawn out as in his dream, before
collapsing against Gabe’s gorgeous, taut body.

Back in the cold light of his bedroom, Matt’s fantasy came to an end with the shrill

sound of his alarm clock. As he mopped himself up with tissues he had a momentary panic
that Milo would have woken up to his shout, but he couldn’t hear anyone moving in the flat.

To his surprise, Milo was still asleep when Matt got up. Unlike Matt, Milo was an early

bird. Matt believed anything before noon was oh-dark-thirty. Shuffling into the lounge, Matt
looked down at his former lover, half buried under the covers. There was no denying Milo
was a good-looking bloke—dark, spiky hair and sharp features—and even now, as he
fantasised about Gabe, Matt’s heart flip-flopped as he stared at Milo. A flash of light under
the table caught his eye. Matt frowned as he bent down to pick it up, discovering his mobile
phone had fallen under the table at some point. There was one text message waiting for him.

“Call me!”
Matt stared at the screen for a minute, suddenly hot at the thought of his fantasy

becoming reality. His heart might have been confused but his body wasn’t. It wanted Gabe.
He had no idea why Gabe was so keen to help him. Gabe’s job was looking after people so
why did he want to take on some flaky bloke after hours? Still, it was obvious Gabe wasn’t
going to go away that easily, and Matt didn’t want him to. Matt pressed a few buttons.

“About bloody time. Are you all right?”
“Morning to you, too.” Matt yawned. “It’s seven-fifteen for crying out loud.”
Milo muttered in his sleep. Not that he felt like being considerate, but Matt walked out

into the hallway.

“Sorry,” Gabe muttered.
“Yeah. You really sound sorry. I’m fine, Gabe.” And he was. Looking at his old lover

didn’t reduced him to the heap of misery he’d been three months ago. God, had it really only
been three months? It felt like a life-time.

“Is he gone yet?”

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Matt laughed quietly. “I’ve just got up. Milo is asleep. He slept on a park bench last

night. Now, let me get ready for work, and then I’ll throw him out.”

“Make sure you do.” Was that a growl Matt heard? Possessive or what? He felt his cock

give a definite twitch of approval.

“I will. Now am I allowed to get ready for work?” He was going to have to book it if he

was going to make his train.

“Yeah. Go on then, you’d better not be late.”
“Nag, nag.” He disconnected the call, grinning at the thought of seeing Gabe again.
“Date?”
“What?” Matt looked up and saw Milo resting against the door, his hair all over the

place and his eyes sparkling with curiosity.

“Who were you talking to? Got a date?”
Matt shook his head, although he couldn’t control the colour heating his cheeks. “No,

not a date. Just talking to a friend from the gym.”

Milo looked sceptical. “A friend?”
Matt couldn’t blame him. It had been Milo who’d made all the friends at uni. Matt had

just tagged along as Milo’s boyfriend, content to bask in his glory. Or as Milo put it, Matt was
too bloody lazy to make his own friends.

“Yes. A friend. Do you want a cup of tea before you go?” Matt didn’t want to talk about

Gabe. It would be too embarrassing to admit just how they’d met and Milo wouldn’t give up
until he’d extracted every last mortifying detail.

Milo nodded, and Matt could see him turning it over in his mind. He could almost hear

Milo asking himself whether it was worth pissing Matt off to satisfy his curiosity. “About
that…”

On guard immediately, Matt walked into the kitchen and filled the kettle. “I told you

I’d give you money for a train ticket back to your parents.”

Joe and Emma would be thrilled to see their son again. Not.
No doubt grimacing at the thought of the welcome he’d get, Milo said, “Can’t I stay

here a few days?”

“You left me, remember? You had better things to do than stay with an old fart like me.

Paul was going to take care of you while you took over the world. So no, you can’t bloody

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well stay here. I know what will happen. You’ll either sit on your arse all day, eating my food
and drinking my beer, or you’ll change the locks so I can’t get in.” Matt was panting by the
end of his tirade, righteous anger coursing through his veins. Turning his back, Matt took a
deep breath and reached for the mugs, pulling out Milo’s old mug even in his anger. He put
a teabag in each, praying that the kettle would hurry up and boil so he could get away from
Milo’s hurt expression.

“You really think so little of me,” Milo said.
Matt had to give the man credit for an Oscar-winning performance. He finished making

the tea and handed Milo the mug. “You gave me no choice,” he said quietly, pushing past
Milo with his mug clutched tightly. One more hurt look and Milo would be wearing the tea.

Milo ran his fingers through his hair. “Please, Matt. One day before you make me face

the parents. They’re goin’ to do my fuckin’ head in, you know that.”

Oh God, Matt was so weak. He knew that letting Milo in the house had been a bad

move. One minute he had been asking for just one night and now another day. “One more
night, and you don’t get my bed. And don’t even think about changing the locks.”

“It was our bed.”
Matt scowled at Milo’s dig. “You crawled into someone else’s bed, so now it’s mine.

One more night and don’t bother asking to stay any longer.” He could see the relief on Milo’s
face. “I’ll have a shower and then the bathroom’s all yours.”

Matt didn’t wait for Milo’s response.
When he came out of the bedroom, dressed for the office, he could hear Milo in the

bathroom singing loudly, although Matt didn’t have a clue what the song was.

His stomach was so churned up he had almost no appetite, but Matt forced himself to

have a slice of toast while he waited for Milo to finish. He nearly swallowed his tongue when
Milo emerged from the steamy bathroom wearing only a towel. From the smirk on Milo’s
face he’d done it deliberately, knowing the reaction he would have on Matt.

Matt turned away before Milo could get to him any further. “I’ll be back later.”
“Okay. Matt…”
Against his better judgement, Matt looked at Milo.
“Thanks. I don’t think I could have dealt with Mum and Dad today.”

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“Don’t make me regret it,” Matt muttered. “It’s just for today, okay. No more. You’re

not staying any longer.”

“Yeah, yeah.”
Matt had a sinking feeling that he’d just made a huge mistake.

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Chapter Three




A week later and the mistake had turned into a disaster. Milo was still parked on his

sofa with the excuse of one more day, always one more day. On the following Tuesday, Matt
got home from work to find the wheelie bin still outside the gate.

Mrs Morris at number forty-four, the neighbourhood nosy parker, watched from her

garden as Matt wheeled the bin up his path. He knew that he ought to make an effort to be
polite but he was too damned tired and not in the mood to play nice.

In the house, instead of the silence of the last three months, the TV was blaring out as it

had been for the past week. It was ironic that Matt had only come to appreciate the once-
hated silence now it had been taken away.

He placed his keys in the pot and went into the lounge to find Milo sitting with his feet

up, watching the six o’clock news. On the coffee table were dirty mugs and plates, obviously
the remains of his lunch. Judging by the bowl, he hadn’t moved his breakfast things either.
Matt was pretty sure Milo was wearing the same clothes as yesterday.

Milo looked up as Matt walked in. “Oh, hi. Have a good day?”
“Long and tiring,” Matt snapped. “You seemed to have had a good day though. Did

you move off your arse at all today? Or was it like yesterday, and the day before?”

Milo gave a long, drawn-out sigh. “I didn’t miss your nagging whilst you were away.”
“Bully for you. Did you do the washing that I asked you to do, or load the

dishwasher?”

Milo had the grace to look slightly guilty. “I meant to but then I got watching this film

and I forgot.”

Matt just stared at him. “I’m going to the gym. You can do the chores now. And Milo, I

want you out of here. I mean it. Tomorrow morning I’ll get you to the station and buy your
ticket home.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Milo went back to watching the TV. He didn’t even acknowledge Matt’s

last remarks.

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Matt walked out of the lounge and deliberately banged his head against the wall in the

hall. He hesitated, contemplating going back in for another fight, then, thinking better of it,
he collected his sports bag from the hall cupboard. Desperation made Matt head for the
gym—anything to get away from the slob on the sofa. Any residual feelings Matt might have
had for Milo had been buried under the mountain of crap accumulating on his coffee table.

It was probably a good thing Gabe wasn’t going to be there tonight, because the way

Matt was feeling, he was going to break down and sob like a little girl on Gabe’s shoulder. As
it was, he took out his frustration on the hapless rowing machine.

* * * *


Shouldering open the locker room door after a hard workout session, Matt bumped into

Luca, the burly owner of The Arches. Luca had been a godsend after Milo had dumped him.
When Matt had stumbled back into the gym after his meltdown, Luca had taken Matt under
his wing, making him work harder than ever before, helping him to channel some of his grief
through physical energy.

“Whoa, steady. Oh hi, Matt.” Luca narrowed his eyes. “Hey, you look like shit.”
Matt rubbed his eyes. “Thanks a lot. I feel like shit,” he admitted. “I’ve not been

sleeping well.”

He’d spent a week being scared witless that Milo would try to join him in bed and all

Matt’s defences would crumble to dust, so he’d ended up staying awake for hours, clutching
at his Bart Simpson duvet cover and listening futilely for any creak of the floorboards. Of
course the bastard had never made a single move.

“Are you ill?” Luca guided Matt over to a sofa next to a large potted plant.
“No, not ill.” Matt’s eyes felt red raw where he had been rubbing them. “Sorry, Luca.

It’s been a bloody long week. My ex has been crashing on the couch. He got kicked out of his
new boyfriend’s place.”

Luca folded his arms across his burly chest. Lord, the bloke was big. “The ex who broke

your heart a few months ago?”

Matt nodded wearily. “That ex. He asked for one night and he’s still sleeping on the

couch a week later.”

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“So throw him out.”
“I’ve tried.” And he had, kind of. Every morning he asked Milo to be gone by the time

he got home, and every evening he’d come home to find Milo still slobbed out on the sofa,
the place still a mess, and the dishes unwashed. He always had an excuse and a promise to
be gone, but Matt was rapidly losing hope.

“Huh!”
Matt winced at the derision in Luca’s voice. “I know. I’m just not strong enough to

throw him out on the street.”

“Do you want me to come round?” Luca crouched in front of Matt.
Much as the idea of Luca manhandling Milo out of the house was appealing, it wasn’t

really fair on his ex-boyfriend. “No, but thanks for the offer. He’ll leave eventually.”

“Is everything all right?”
Matt looked up to see Gabe staring at them, a frown between his silver eyebrows.
Luca gave a satisfied grin. “Now this man might be able to help. Gabe’s a policeman.”
“I know that…” Matt tried to stand, but Luca pushed him back onto the seat.
“Stay there. I don’t want you passing out. I can’t afford the insurance.”
Gabe sat down next to Matt. “What’s happened, Matt? Are you ill?”
“His ex is being a dick,” Luca said bluntly.
“He’s still there? Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”
Flinching from Gabe’s anger, Matt leaned away from him. “I didn’t think he’d still be

here.”

Luca looked at the two of them. “You know each other? Cool, I’m going back to work.

This place doesn’t run itself. Let me know if you need me to throw the fucker out.” He stood,
wincing as he did. “Damn. I’m getting old.” Not waiting for an answer he walked away,
leaving Gabe and Matt staring at each other.

Gabe glowered furiously. “You are going home and telling him that he leaves

tomorrow. I will be around in the morning to make sure he does.”

“You don’t need to do that,” Matt protested. “What are you doing here anyway? It’s

Tuesday. Aren’t you supposed to work on a Tuesday?”

“My shift got changed at the last minute, and don’t change the subject.”
“I feel like such an idiot. I thought he’d stay the night and leave.”

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Gabe gave a sharp back of laughter. “You are an idiot, for letting him through the door

in the first place.”

“Thanks.” Matt should have been offended. He would have been if he could have

summoned up the energy. Gabe pulled him in for a hug, and just for a minute, Matt let his
head rest on Gabe’s shoulder, vaguely smelling the scent of lavender from the detergent on
Gabe’s T-shirt.

“Let’s go and have a drink. You can explain to me why you didn’t call me and ask for

help.”

“I’m an idiot?” Matt repeated helpfully.
Gabe placed a kiss on top of his head. “I’m your friend, Matt, and friends look after

each other. Milo is a problem, and I’ll get rid of him. Okay? Either that or I’ll sic Luca on
him.”

“You don’t have to…” Matt began then yelped as Gabe pinched his hip. “Ow!”
“You say ‘Yes, Gabe’.”
“What?” Matt rubbed his hip. Fucker had a sharp pinch.
“Say ‘Yes, Gabe’.”
“Yes, Gabe,” Matt said obediently.
“Good boy. Let’s get this drink and discuss how we are going to get rid of your

dickhead ex-boyfriend.”

* * * *


In the pub, Gabe steered Matt to a table and went to the bar. Matt tried to suppress the

frisson of excitement at Gabe’s high-handedness. When he returned, Gabe gave Matt his pint
and sat down opposite him. “We’ll go home via the train station, and you can buy that ticket
you promised him.”

“So I just hand him the ticket and say what?”
“Fuck off. Don’t come back.”
Gabe’s suggestion was tempting but Matt could just imagine what Milo’s reaction was

going to be.

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“And what happens when he begs for another few days?” Matt asked over the rim of

his glass.

“What are you, Matthew Collins? Man or fucking mouse? Look at the state you’re in.

This man is toxic waste. Time to grow a set and tell him to piss off back to Mummy.”

“Poor Emma,” Matt muttered. “She’ll hate me forever.”
“That is not your problem,” Gabe said firmly. “Now man up and get rid of him.”
“Yes, sir.” Matt was tempted to salute.
“And I’ll be round tomorrow morning to make sure he is gone.”
“Checking up on me or him?”
“Both. You should have told me sooner that he was hanging around.”
Matt gave Gabe a wry smile. “I never expected to find my knight in shining armour.”
Gabe grinned. “I even burst into your bedroom like in the fairy tales. Mind you, I

wouldn’t have kissed you until you’d had a shower. The stench was just too much.”

“What is it with you and the way I smell?”
Gabe looked unrepentant. “I just like the smell of clean, fresh male. I don’t have a kink

for sweaty jockstraps.”

“Thank God for that,” Matt said. “I’ll be seriously worried if you start sniffing my

boxers.” He looked at Gabe. “I don’t know why you feel the need to look after me, but
thanks, I appreciate it.”

“Not a problem. Come on. I need to eat. If we go to that kebab shop, we can eat it

there.”

Matt nodded. “Cool. Let me buy you dinner. It’s the least I can do for you.”
“Deal. But no garlic sauce.”
“Okay, don’t you like it?” Matt caught the wicked gleam in Gabe’s eyes. “Oh…oh! We

could both have garlic?”

Gabe shook his head. “No garlic.”
Matt stayed talking in the kebab shop until Gabe was yawning more than he was

talking. He apologetically admitted he needed to go home to bed as he’d been awake for over
twenty-four hours. They went via the train station and Gabe insisted that Matt bought the
ticket, then Gabe walked him to his front door despite Matt’s protestations that it wasn’t
necessary.

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“Are you sure you don’t want to come in?” Matt asked as they walked up the path. He

couldn’t help the feeling of disappointment when Gabe shook his head.

“Firstly, I don’t want your ex-boyfriend hanging around, and secondly, I’m liable to fall

asleep on you.”

Matt was about to point out that he wouldn’t mind just sleeping with Gabe when the

policeman leant forwards and brushed his mouth over Matt’s.

“I have to go now,” he murmured, so close Matt could feel his breath. “I’ll see you in

the morning.” He kissed Matt again, a slow, wet, open-mouthed kiss that made Matt’s toes
curl. “Good night.”

Gabe walked back down the path, leaving Matt staring after him. At the gate, he turned

back to smile at Matt. “Sweet dreams.”

Half-hard, Matt watched him go then put the key in the door. The light was still on in

lounge. Matt hesitated before pushing the door open. He wasn’t surprised to find Milo in the
same position he’d left him in, plates still littering the table. Anger burned inside him at the
man’s laziness.

“Oh, hey,” Milo said. “Have a good evening?”
“Here’s your train ticket. You’re leaving in the morning.” Matt hadn’t meant to blurt it

out like that but maybe Gabe had been right. He needed to be blunt.

Milo looked at the ticket in his hand. “I’ve overstayed my welcome, huh?”
Matt looked pointedly at the plates and cups on the coffee table. “It’s time to go, Milo.”
“Are you sure there’s no chance of you and me ever getting back together?” Milo

sounded pathetically hopeful.

Before meeting Gabe, Matt would have jumped at the chance of Milo walking back into

his arms and his bed. Now though, Gabe was in his life and had made it clear he was
interested in more than friendship. Despite Matt’s residual feelings for Milo, he knew that
given the opportunity Milo would cheat again, he was just that sort of man, and Matt needed
more than that. This relationship with Gabe was new and uncertain, but he had a gut feeling
Gabe wasn’t the type to cheat on his partner.

“No, I don’t think so. We had our time together. You need a fresh start and so do I.”
Matt walked out of the lounge before Milo had a chance to change his mind with his

persuasive tongue. Once the door had closed behind him, Matt collapsed against the wall

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and shut his eyes. No matter his brave words, that had been one of the hardest things he had
ever done.

* * * *


Matt had no doubt Milo would string out his departure until the last possible moment.

In preparation, Matt had phoned his office telling them he’d be a bit late as he had a doctor’s
appointment—he would make up the hours later in the week to keep his boss happy. He
made coffee and waited for Milo to finish in the bathroom.

When Milo finally came out wrapped in a black towel, he seemed surprised to see Matt

was waiting for him.

“You’re going to be late for work,” Milo said. He leaned against the wall, almost pulling

off nonchalance, but Matt could see the tension in his muscles.

“I rang in. Told them I’d be in later. You’re going today, remember?” Matt said.
A bitter expression crossed Milo’s face. “How could I forget? Making sure I vacate the

premises?”

Matt nodded firmly. “You said you’d go after a day. Now it’s a week. The place is a

bloody tip. If I don’t watch you leave, I’ll come back to find you still here this evening with
more crap around you.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll crawl back to Mummy and Daddy with my tail between my legs.

They’ll love that, won’t they?” Milo’s lip curled in the familiar sneer that he always used
when talking about his parents.

In Matt’s opinion, Milo’s parents would be just as horrified to see their son. They were

decent people who’d been saddled with a son they just didn’t understand. Most of the time,
the three of them just avoided interacting. It was simpler that way.

“It’s only temporary. Until you get a job.”
“Yeah right. Like that’s going to happen,” Milo said sarcastically.
I’ve got a job,” Matt pointed out.
Milo gave a derisive snort. “You got a boring job, in a boring company, doing what?

Shuffling paper from one side of the desk to the other.”

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“’Cause daytime TV is so much better?” Matt snapped back. He watched Milo struggle

to retain his defiance then collapsed like a deflated balloon.

“Daytime TV is fucking awful. Thought Richard and Judy was bad enough, but fuck me,

day after fucking day of Judge Judy. I’m going mad.”

Matt had to swallow hard to bite back the furious words asking to be aired. “Then get a

job. Do some voluntary work. Volunteer for your MP, or an eco-charity. Do something, Milo,
before you forget who you are.”

“I think it might be too late for that,” Milo admitted quietly and Matt’s heart bled for

him, despite his anger.

The buzz of the doorbell shook him out of the sombre moment. Matt opened the door,

knowing who would be on the other side, and grinned at the uniformed officer.

“You just couldn’t help yourself, could you?” he teased. “And in full uniform as well.”

Matt stood back to let Gabe into the hallway. “You should be at work. I don’t want you to get
into trouble.” Gabe looked completely edible.

Gabe shrugged. “I thought you might need backup. Where is he?”
“Milo’s in the lounge.”
As if he had heard his name, Milo opened the lounge door, scowling at Gabe. Matt was

thankful that Milo had ditched the towel and had managed to put a pair of sweats on. His
chest was bare though, and Matt saw the flare of anger in Gabe’s eyes as the policeman
looked at Milo.

“Why the hell is a copper here?” Milo asked, with his normal lack of respect for

authority.

“Making sure you leave,” Gabe snapped back.
Milo’s jaw dropped. “You called the cops?” he asked Matt, sounding hurt and betrayed.
Matt said, “Of course I didn’t. Gabe’s a…friend.”
It was almost comical watching the myriad of emotions chase across Milo’s face—anger,

hurt, jealousy and curiosity all plainly visible. Just as visible was the smug glee on Gabe’s
face. Matt wanted to thump them both.

“You don’t have any friends,” Milo scoffed, and Matt hated him just a little more. Then

Milo frowned. “Gym guy? Is this him?”

“I met Gabe at the gym,” Matt allowed.

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“And he’s here as your bodyguard? You needed protection from me? He’s a bit old for

you, isn’t he?”

Oh, hell. Now Milo was really hurt. Matt could tell by the way his shoulders drooped as

he turned away.

Gabe either didn’t notice or didn’t care. “Isn’t it time you were leaving?” he asked Milo.

The man could really pull an offensive tone when he wanted.

“I was going to go to the station with him,” Matt said.
“I’ll drive you both to the station.” Gabe’s eyes suddenly narrowed and he fixed on the

T-shirt Milo had on. “What are you wearing?”

“One of my old T-shirts. What’s it got to do with you?”
Oh, shit! Matt panicked. Gabe obviously remembered Matt had been wearing the T-shirt

the first time they’d met. He wasn’t going to make a fuss about a T-shirt, was he?

Gabe grunted and let it go.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Matt turned to Milo. “Are you ready to go?” In spite of the

fact Milo had dumped him, Matt was a good-hearted guy and he felt bad about throwing
Milo out.

As if sensing his uncertainty, Milo held out his hand. “Babe, are you sure I…”
“Time to go,” Gabe said brusquely, moving so that he was between Milo and Matt.
Milo’s lip curled. “Well, what do you know? The old guy’s a pig and a guard dog!”
Any sympathy Matt was feeling for Milo drained away in the face of his rudeness. The

man didn’t even have enough sense to quit while he was behind. Matt picked up his keys
and wallet, and waited for Milo to collect his jacket.

Gabe shot Matt a concerned look. “You okay?” he muttered.
“No, but I will be.”
Ignoring Milo, Gabe stepped into Matt’s space. “I’ll take him to the station and make

sure he gets on the train. You go to work. I’ll call you later.”

Feeling the start of a tension headache, Matt wearily rubbed his temple. “That would be

good.” He didn’t feel inclined to argue. In fact, he wanted to drop his head on Gabe’s
shoulder, and let him take care of Matt’s world.

“Go to work.”
Gabe dropped a kiss on Matt’s forehead then he turned to Milo. “Let’s go.”

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Milo sneered at him but had the sense to keep quiet. Gabe hustled him out of the door,

leaving Matt standing alone in the middle of the room.

The front door banged as the two men left. Matt didn’t move for a minute, tempted to

pull a sickie and curl up on the sofa, but Gabe had told him to go to work and Matt wanted
to please Gabe. He decided he was too tired to follow that thought too closely.

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Chapter Four




As promised, Gabe called Matt a couple of hours later. Matt cursed as his mobile phone

rang, disturbing the office. He’d forgotten to put his phone on silent in all the kerfuffle that
morning.

With a muttered apology to his boss who glared at him from across the room, Matt

answered his phone. “Gabe?”

“Hey. He’s gone, and he won’t be coming back.” Gabe obviously didn’t believe in social

niceties.

A smile curved Matt’s lips. “Where have you hidden the body?” he teased.
“Huh! Think you’re funny, don’t you?”
“I think so. What did you do to Milo?” Matt wasn’t sure he wanted to know. On the

other hand, he needed to know if anything was going to come back and bite him on the arse
later.

“I told him to fuck off and leave you alone. You’ve got other things to think about

now.”

Matt raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Like what?”
“Like where you want to go for dinner after the gym tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow is Thursday. You go to the gym. I arranged to see you there, remember?”
Biting his lip, Matt hesitated.
“Matt? You still there?” Gabe sounded impatient and Matt hurried to answer.
“Yes, I am. Gabe, I’m grateful an’ everything, but it’s…”
“Too much, too soon?” Gabe queried, his voice softening.
“Yeah,” Matt admitted, feeling foolish, because hell yes, he wanted in Gabe’s boxers. He

just wasn’t ready.

“Strictly friends only. No benefits yet.”
Matt grinned. “I can do that. Dinner it is. How about that Italian round the corner from

the gym?”

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“Mamma Lucia’s? Sure. Be prepared to be spoilt rotten though. She likes me.”
Matt heard the smugness in Gabe’s voice. “Don’t tell me. She’s another one of your old

ladies.”

“Mamma Lucia is the hot chick with legs up to her armpits. The old lady is her

grandmamma.”

She’s Mamma Lucia?” Matt choked, instantly remembering the woman who’d acted as

the maître d’. Matt was definitely gay, but he could appreciate a good-looking woman, and
Lucia—all long, long legs, shiny brown hair and a full pouty mouth—had all the men staring
at her, gay or not.

“Lucia’s a hot babe,” Gabe said. “She’s always trying to lure me into the sack.”
“And has she succeeded?” Matt tried to keep the tone light.
Gabe laughed and Matt knew he’d seen right through Matt’s pathetic attempts at

subtlety. “She’s lacking a certain something that goes with the territory.”

“Oh?” Matt’s breath caught in his throat. “Gabe, how old are you?”
“I wondered when you’d ask. Don’t be fooled by the hair. I’m twenty-seven. I went

grey at twenty-one, just like my father. How old are you?”

“Twenty-two.”
Gabe chuckled. “Just a baby. Have a rest tonight, and I’ll see you tomorrow, Matt. Catch

up with you after showers if I don’t see you before.”

The bastard disconnected the call, leaving Matt stuck at his desk with an instant hard-

on. Oh yeah, Matt could remember exactly what Gabe’s body looked like, wet and glistening
in the shower. It was obviously going to be his wank fantasy for a long, long time. When his
boner finally subsided to the point where he could walk, Matt headed straight for the men’s
room. He thanked God the cubicle was empty. Matt locked the door behind him and
unzipped his trousers, shoving his hand into his boxers with a bitten-back sigh of relief as his
hand curled around his dick. He leaned his forehead against his arm as he tugged on his
shaft, spreading the drop of fluid over the head with his thumb. He jacked his cock to a
slideshow of Gabe in his mind—Gabe as a policeman, Gabe smiling at him and Gabe naked
in the shower with soap running down into the light mat of hair on his chest. Matt closed his
eyes as he imagined kneeling at Gabe’s feet, and taking that thick cock in his mouth. The
visual was enough to push him over the edge and Matt had to bite into his hand to suppress

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a yell as he came over his fist, his knees threatening to give way. He cleaned his hand with
some toilet paper, disposing of the evidence before he left the cubicle. As he washed his
hands, Matt caught sight of his flushed, sweaty face. He splashed cold water on his cheeks in
an effort to calm down. The last thing he needed was his boss asking what the matter was.

Matt took a deep breath and stared into the mirror. Friends only? Yeah, sure. Matt just

needed to keep telling himself that.

* * * *


The following evening, Matt almost tripped over his feet in his eagerness to get to the

gym. He forced himself to slow down, reminding himself that a sprained ankle would
scupper their date before it had even started. It isn’t a date. It isn’t a date. Matt repeated it so
often it was like a mantra. Just friends. That’s all Matt wanted—for now.

Matt was already dressed for his workout, so he put his jacket in the locker room and

headed for the gym. He had to bite back his disappointment when Gabe was nowhere to be
seen. Gabe was probably coming straight from the police station and Matt didn’t really know
what time he normally arrived.

He began his stretches on the mats, loosening up his tight muscles. Matt could feel the

tension across his neck and shoulders, and made a mental note to book in a massage. After
he had warmed up, Matt headed for the weights. It didn’t follow his normal routine. It was,
however, the place that had the best view of the door from the locker room. If Gabe walked
into the gym, Matt would spot him.

By eight o’clock, Matt knew that Gabe wasn’t turning up. Disappointment warred with

anger as he headed for the locker rooms. A quick check of his phone showed Gabe hadn’t
called. God, he was so stupid to expect anything different. His superhero had turned into a
superdick. Gabe had seemed so interested in Matt—look at the effort he had made to get
Milo out of Matt’s life. Maybe that’s it. He thought Matt was weak for letting Milo push him
around. Under the pounding water of the shower, Matt cursed himself for being so
vulnerable. He washed quickly, having no desire to linger any longer.

He went past Mamma Lucia’s in case Gabe had been running late and had decided to

meet Matt there. Reason told him Gabe would have called to let him know, but he checked

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anyway. The restaurant was packed and Matt left after a brief look showed him Gabe wasn’t
waiting at any of the tables.

At home, Matt slumped in front of the TV with a bottle of beer and a kebab. He flicked

on the TV, finding some American cop show to watch whilst he ate his dinner. His mobile
phone sat on the coffee table, mocking him with its silence. By ten o’clock, Matt couldn’t
summon up the enthusiasm to sit through another repeat and decided to head for bed. He
turned over to the ten o’clock news just to catch the headlines.

More riots. The wave of protests following the police shooting of a teenager appeared to

be spreading. Matt frowned as he watched the report, suddenly realising that the massive
blaze they were showing was only a couple of miles from him. There were the normal
pictures of young guys smashing shop windows in a frenzy, seemingly unconcerned about
the eyes of the nation upon them.

It didn’t take rocket science to realise where Gabe had been all evening, as wave upon

wave of police in full riot gear spilled down the streets. The gym was in the opposite
direction to the riots—Matt wouldn’t have noticed it earlier. In front of the camera there was
a sudden burst of bricks and bottles being hurled at the police. Matt sat up, paying attention
for the first time as he desperately and futilely sought Gabe’s face among the masked
policemen.

Initially, Matt was so engrossed with what was happening on the TV, he didn’t notice

the sudden vibration on the table. Then the name on the phone screen caught his eye and he
launched himself at his phone.

“Gabe, are you all right? Are you hurt?” he gasped, almost babbling with the relief of

hearing from him.

“Guess you saw, huh?”
Damn, Gabe sounded exhausted.
“It’s on the news. Where are you?”
“Still at the station. I called to apologise for going AWOL.”
“You are forgiven. Are you coming home?” Maybe not the best choice of words, but

Gabe didn’t seem to notice.

“Soonish. Everything died down quickly but the relief isn’t here yet.”
“Do you want to come round here for some dinner?” Matt asked hesitantly.

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“I’d love to, but not tonight. It could be another couple of hours before I can leave and

then I’m on early shift. I’ll call about tomorrow evening if there are no more riots.”

Matt quelled his urge to offer Gabe somewhere to sleep, just so that Matt could satisfy

his need to check the man was intact. “I’m really glad you’re in one piece.”

“Me too.” Gabe yawned. “Thanks for being so understanding. Night, Matt.”
“G’night, Gabe.”
Feeling more relaxed than he had all evening, Matt wandered into the bathroom. He

brushed his teeth, then as he spat into the sink he caught sight of his grin. Despite the
stressful day Gabe had endured, he had made sure Matt was all right.

“This man is a keeper,” Matt told his reflection.
Mirror Matt just grinned back at him.

* * * *


Unfortunately, the rioters weren’t so understanding about Matt’s need to see Gabe

again. Trouble followed Friday and Saturday night, and by the time the streets had quietened
down and Gabe had got some time off, the only thing he was fit for was sleep. He called Matt
every day though, even if it was only for a few minutes at the end of his shift.

On Tuesday, Matt went to the gym as usual, despite not expecting to see Gabe.
That evening, Luca was in the mood to chat, and as Matt didn’t have anywhere to be, he

was happy to listen before his workout. Luca was having boyfriend problems. As long as
Matt had known Luca, he had been having boyfriend problems.

Luca swiped angrily at a water stain on the counter. “I tell him to wait for me, but no,

he’s out when I get home. Says he’s bored. Then he doesn’t come back until three a.m.—I
can’t take every night off just to be with him. He knows that.”

“You have an assistant manager, don’t you? Perhaps you could take Darius away for a

weekend?” Matt suggested.

“I can’t leave the club for a whole weekend. It’s the busiest time.” Luca looked outraged

at the suggestion.

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“Maybe during the week, then?” The end of Matt’s sentence trailed off into a squeak as

someone ran their hand down his back. Matt looked over his shoulder to see Gabe smirking
at Luca.

“Luca’s married to this club. I don’t know why he just doesn’t admit he’s already in a

steady relationship.”

“Ha ha.” Luca scowled at Gabe. “You been talking to Darius?”
Gabe laughed. “You’re here twenty-four-seven, Luca. It ain’t rocket science to work out

Darius is bored shitless. Why don’t you find him a job here?”

“Doing what? The boy has a degree in business. What should I ask him to do? Clean the

toilets?”

“What does he do at the moment?” Matt asked curiously. He was acutely aware of

Gabe’s body behind him. Gabe had obviously been working out. Matt could smell his sweat
and feel his warmth. It took all of Matt’s concentration to focus on their conversation and not
his desire to press back against Gabe’s body.

“Nothing. He’s not managed to find a job yet,” Luca admitted. “He’s just graduated

from uni, and well, you know what the job market is like.”

Matt tried hard not to think of Milo in the same position, but some of his tension must

have seeped through to Gabe because the policeman rubbed his lower back in slow circles.
“Get him in here. Start him off with the toilets. You never know, he might have ideas for
your business.”

“He’s a kid. What does he know about running a business?” Luca was going to polish a

hole through the counter if he didn’t stop rubbing at the same spot.

“He’s older than you were when you started this place,” Gabe pointed out, “and he’s a

smart kid. Give him a chance to prove you wrong, and keep an eye on him at the same time.”

Luca looked unconvinced. “He hates the gym.”
“Darius hates the gym because it takes all your time. He loves you. Ask for his help. He

may surprise you.”

“As long as he doesn’t spray paint the locker rooms bright pink,” Luca grumbled,

throwing the cloth onto the counter behind him.

“Pink is the new beige,” intoned Gabe.

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Luca scowled at him. “Patrol the streets in a bright pink uniform and Darius can spray

the locker rooms whatever colour he likes.”

Matt laughed as Gabe shuddered.
“Bite your tongue. I’d be lynched at the station for even mentioning the idea.”
“Not to mention what would happen the first time you set foot in the Market,” Matt

said. The Market was a footballers’ pub. If you weren’t covered with the ink of the local team,
it wasn’t worth even setting foot in there. Matt didn’t go near the place.

Gabe’s expression reflected what he thought of that idea. “I don’t have a death wish.

Now I’m going to take my boy here off to get hot and sweaty before I feed him and…”

He stopped there, which maybe was a good thing because Matt’s mind immediately

fixated on ‘my boy’ and ‘hot and sweaty’.

Matt let himself be led away with an apologetic glance to Luca. The owner of the bar

rolled his eyes then turned to help another member of the gym. Matt searched for something
to say, eventually settling on, “It’s Tuesday.”

“All day,” Gabe said. He seemed intent on steering them to the free weights.
“But you don’t come here on Tuesday.”
“Not normally,” Gabe agreed, “but I got tonight off because of last week, and you’re

here.”

“I could have been busy,” Matt pointed out.
“You’re here, aren’t you?”
That was it. No discussion needed. Matt was here, therefore Gabe was here, and Matt

really wanted to see what Gabe would do next—after Matt got hot and stinky. Now he had
to work on keeping his body under control, because at the moment it was wide awake and
begging for action, and his shorts weren’t hiding a lot.

“Ready to start?” Gabe asked.
Matt was more than ready, but he wasn’t thinking about the gym. He was acutely

conscious of the hand at the small of his back, guiding him around the equipment.

“I’ll go and run, while you work out,” Gabe said. “Then we could go for that meal if

you like?”

“That’d be great.”

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Okay, so maybe Matt shouldn’t have sounded quite so eager. Desperation was never a

good look. It was worth it, however, to see the grin break across Gabe’s face.

“Get going.”
Matt just managed to hold back an undignified squeak as he felt a sharp pat to his

backside. The man was going down for that! He glared at Gabe over his shoulder.

“Yes?” Gabe smirked at him, an eyebrow raised innocently.
“Later,” Matt warned, only to realise that was a bad move, as Gabe leant forwards, his

warm breath ghosting over Matt’s ear.

“Promises, promises.”
“Can’t you go home to do that, Gabe?” Luca said disgustedly as he walked past.
Matt flushed bright red but Gabe laughed.
“You’re just jealous.”
“Course I am,” Luca agreed. “Now put him down before I have to throw you two out.”
Luca would as well. The man didn’t tolerate any goings-on in his gym. Matt had seen

more than one pair shown the door when they’d got a bit too friendly.

“I’m going,” Matt muttered, ignoring Gabe’s mocking chuckle as he headed for the

weights.

Conscious of Gabe’s eyes on him everywhere he went, it was the longest and weirdest

routine since he’d joined The Arches. Even stranger was the number of men who suddenly
wanted to talk to Matt, from a greeting as they swapped machines to a chat at the water
fountain. Matt was used to completing his routine in silence with only his iPod for company
but now suddenly everyone wanted to talk to him.

The first conversation merited a scowl from Gabe as he ran on the treadmill. Matt could

feel Gabe’s eyes boring into him. By the time Matt was chatting to a weedy-looking guy
about the tribute band playing in the local pub at the weekend, Gabe gave up any pretence of
watching from a distance.

“Are you ready to go?” he asked shortly, as he joined Matt at the water fountain.
Matt was more than ready to get out of there, but he wasn’t going to roll over just

because the policeman was having a jealous hissy-fit. “I haven’t finished yet.”

The weedy man looked up at Gabe and took a step backwards, giving an audible

swallow. “I—er—nice talking to you, Matt.”

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“And you, Chaz. See you next week,” Matt said.
An expression of smug satisfaction on his face, Gabe watched Chaz nod and scurry

away, out of range of the big, scary policeman.

“What the hell was that all about?” Matt didn’t need some big oaf peeing up his leg in

public, thank you very much.

Gabe turned his attention on Matt, who struggled not to roll over and show his belly.

Jesus, Gabe was pissed off. Matt found it exciting.

“We’re going now,” Gabe said, calm, too calm.
“I’m not finished.”
“Yes, you are.” Gabe started herding Matt towards the locker room.
Short of making a scene, there was little Matt could do except follow Gabe’s lead. Once

they were out of sight though, he was going to give Gabe what-for. Maybe once they had
showered. Oh, hell! Gabe, all that naked skin. Matt was going to be in his own special hell.

Gabe said very little once they had got to the locker rooms, apparently content now that

Matt wasn’t putting up any form of resistance.

After getting his towel and shower gel, Matt wandered into the shower room. It was

just Matt’s luck it was empty apart from the two of them but he headed to the corner
showerhead to put some distance between him and Gabe. He was aware of Gabe’s narrowed
eyes, but he ignored him, stepping under the hot spray and closing his eyes. When he
opened them again, Gabe was standing directly in front of him, soapy trails down his chest
and arms.

“What the hell…?” Matt spluttered.
“I’m not going to disappear just ’cause you shut your eyes,” Gabe informed him. “You

think I was too pushy in there?”

“What the hell gives you the right to run off someone who was just talking to me?”

Matt asked furiously.

“None. I was jealous. I’m sorry.”
Matt gaped at Gabe, taken aback by his immediate apology.
“I’ll probably do it again though. I’m a possessive bastard. Can you deal with that?”

From the set look on Gabe’s face, he was dead serious.

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Matt frowned. “Does that mean I can’t talk to another bloke without you muscling in all

the time?”

“Probably not,” Gabe agreed cheerfully, “but you can tell me to fuck off.”
Matt thought about it for a few minutes. He’d never had to deal with someone else’s

possessiveness before. Milo was always flirting with other guys. He’d probably fucked a few
as well, and he certainly hadn’t cared who Matt had talked to. Maybe Milo just hadn’t cared
at all.

“I’m not him.” Gabe smoothed out the furrow in Matt’s brow. “I’m possessive and

easily jealous of other men, but I won’t screw around behind your back.”

“How did you know what I was thinking about?” Matt asked.
“It wasn’t difficult to work out you were thinking about that arsehole.”
A burst of voices outside the shower room made them both look over to the door.

Dropping his hand, Gabe took a step back and hit the closest shower button. Three men came
in and continued their conversation, ignoring Matt and Gabe.

He was glad for the interruption. Finishing his shower quickly, Matt pushed past Gabe

and headed for the door. Gabe followed hard on his heels. There were too many men in the
locker room for them to pursue the conversation, so they concentrated on getting dressed.
Matt finished first and waited outside for Gabe. He could have hung about in the locker
room, but blow it, he wanted Gabe to have a moment’s uncertainty.

The look of relief on Gabe’s face when he saw Matt still there gave Matt a sense of

satisfaction.

“Shall we go for that meal?” Gabe asked.
“You going to get annoyed if the waiter talks to me to take my order?”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Gabe snapped as he steered Matt towards the exit.
Matt tried to wriggle away. “Will you quit herding me around? I am not a fucking

sheep.”

“But I am top dog.” Gabe didn’t let go.
“God, you’re a pain in my arse,” Matt muttered.
Gabe smirked. “Not yet. Maybe later if you’re lucky.” He yelped as Matt dug him in the

ribs with his elbow. “What the hell was that for?”

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It was Matt’s turn to smirk. “For being a smartarse. Now feed me before I change my

mind.”

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Chapter Five




Mamma Lucia’s was packed and yet somehow Gabe managed to get the best table, with

Mamma Lucia leading the way. The maître d’ was gorgeous and all over Gabe. It left Matt
with a strange feeling in his stomach, but he was determined not to show any sign of
insecurity in front of Gabe. He wasn’t the possessive type. It was hard though, watching her
touch Gabe, blatantly ignoring Matt’s presence. Matt was tempted to walk out but he had
more self-respect than that. Besides, he knew Gabe would come after him. He hoped Gabe
would come after him.

Lucia stopped petting Gabe eventually, promising to come back and take their order

personally. Matt gritted his teeth. If she touched Gabe one more time she could shove his
order where the sun don’t shine.

Sitting back in his chair, Gabe grinned at his companion. “She’s quite a girl, isn’t she?

Told you she likes me.”

Matt let out a long breath, managing to force out a calm, “I don’t think I would have

needed telling. She certainly shows her affection.”

“That she does. Must be all that Italian blood.” Gabe leant back, a definite sparkle of

mischief in his eyes. Matt realised Gabe was deliberately trying to provoke a reaction. He
could wait ’til hell froze, Matt would just stay calm and in control.

“I thought about fucking her once. Out the back,” Gabe said suddenly.
Matt stared at him.
“Just to see what it was like.”
“Why are you telling me this?” Matt asked faintly, feeling suddenly nauseous.
“To let you know I’m not interested in Lucia. I’ve thought about her, but yeah—no.”
“Good for you. I’ll be going now.” Matt got to his feet.
Instantly, Gabe stood, reaching out to grab Matt’s arm. “Wait. I’m sorry. I was out of

line.”

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Matt looked down at Gabe’s hand, firm around his biceps. He looked up again into

Gabe’s pale eyes. The mischief had slid away. Matt realised Gabe was scared that Matt was
about to leave him. Good!

“Don’t use me for your head games, Gabe. You can’t tell me what to do and then

parade your would-be lovers in front of me. I thought you weren’t like that.”

Gabe didn’t let go of his arm. “I’m not. Hell, I don’t know what got into me. Forgive

me?”

Matt didn’t sit down but he didn’t pull away either. “Milo used to play these games. He

wasn’t possessive but he liked people fawning all over him. I didn’t make a fuss because I
thought he didn’t take it seriously. Perhaps I should have.”

“I’m an idiot. She’s just trying to wind you up, and I was getting my own back

watching all those men wanting to paw you at the gym.”

“They were talking to me, that’s all. None of them have ever shown any interest in me.”

At Gabe’s derisive snort, Matt said, “What now?”

“You’re really blind, are you?”
“Blind? What do you mean?” Matt watched Gabe roll his eyes.
“Jesus, Matt. Have you not seen the way they look at you? There were at least four guys

who couldn’t take their eyes off you, and that skinny dude was chatting you up.”

“We were talking about music,” Matt exclaimed, “and as for the others…what the hell

are you talking about?” He was aware other customers were looking over at them but he
didn’t give a toss.

“Sit down.”
Matt let Gabe push him back into his seat. He desperately wished they’d ordered their

drinks because he could have murdered a beer right about then.

“Is everything all right?”
Oh, great. She was back.
“It’s cool, Lucia. Can you bring us two beers?” Gabe asked.
“Sure,” Lucia said uncertainly, paying attention to Matt for the first time.
He smiled at her, aware it was more of a grimace, and it certainly didn’t reach his eyes.
“The beers, Lucia, please,” Gabe said, the implied get lost couldn’t have been more

obvious.

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She left, leaving them staring at each other.
Gabe huffed shortly. “I need a drink.” He gave Matt a brief smile. “I’m a moron.”
Matt didn’t disagree with that.
“It didn’t occur to me you didn’t know those guys were flirting with you.”
Matt knew his gaydar wasn’t the best, but flirting with him? “I don’t know what you’re

talking about.”

“I know you don’t.” Gabe slid his hand over to hold Matt’s just as their beer arrived,

but he didn’t let go of Matt’s hand. “Thanks, Lu.”

“Do you need some more time to pick your food?”
“We’ll have two of Mamma’s specials,” Gabe said without breaking eye contact with

Matt.

Matt was tempted to roll his eyes but he was still freaked by the conversation. Gabe’s

high-handedness was almost grounding. At least Gabe was focused on him now instead of
Lucia.

Gabe stroked Matt’s palm. “Forget the last ten minutes. Let’s just drink our beer and

eat. I’m starving.”

Aware of how aroused he was by the way Gabe played with his palm but still feeling

the last vestiges of anger, Matt withdrew his hand and ignored Gabe's knowing smirk as he
fumbled for his beer.

The food arrived a few minutes later, breaking the awkward silence that had fallen

between them.

Lucia followed behind the waitress to check they were all right. Once more her hand

went to land on Gabe’s shoulder, but at Matt’s scowl, she took a step back.

“Enjoy your food,” she said hastily and walked away.
Staring after her to make sure the bitch left and took her wandering hand with her, Matt

heard Gabe chuckle.

“That’s the first time I’ve see her back away. If looks could kill, Matt.” He grinned at

Matt. “You’re just as possessive.” His tone suggested he didn’t object in the least.

Matt looked away, hearing the delight but not believing it. “Milo hated it when I got

possessive. He said I didn’t own him and if people wanted to touch or kiss him then I should
back the fuck off.”

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“Milo was a prick,” Gabe said bluntly.
“Yeah, well, we can agree on that.”
Picking up his fork, Matt dug at the food in front of him. It smelt divine and Matt’s

stomach rumbled in appreciation.

“Time to eat,” Gabe agreed.
Reluctantly Matt did as he had been told and was hard put not to moan as the flavours

of the sauce slid across his taste buds.

“Oh my God,” he moaned. “Why have I never tried this before?” He swallowed and it

was like liquid gold slipping down his throat.

Gabe had been watching his reactions. “Worth dealing with the flirting and the

touching?” he asked.

Matt narrowed his eyes. “Maybe.”
“Lucia’s a genius. This is an old family recipe she’s adapted. It wins her awards and

everything.”

Matt pressed his lips together. “Good for Lucia.”
Gabe nodded. “Why don’t you eat some more,” he encouraged, holding out a forkful of

the award-winning pasta.

Despite the amazing taste, the small amount of food Matt had managed to eat sat like a

leaden weight at the pit of his stomach. He was about to refuse the food when he saw that
Gabe’s eyes were focused on his mouth. Slowly and deliberately, Matt licked his lips,
watching Gabe’s eyes flare as he tracked the movement. Matt leant forwards and wrapped
his lips around the fork. Hearing Gabe whimper, he pulled back and swallowed the food,
licking his lips to capture some sauce in the corner of his mouth.

Gabe immediately offered him another forkful.
“Are you intending to feed me all your dinner? We’re eating the same thing,” Matt

pointed out.

“If it makes you moan like that again, I’ll feed you both plates. I’m hard enough to drill

nails now.”

Matt cocked his head. “You’re hard?” Oh yeah, Gabe was hard, judging by the way he

was fidgeting in his seat. Matt smiled with satisfaction. “Good.” He calmly started eating his
own dinner.

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“I’ll make you pay for that,” Gabe warned.
“Oh, yes?” Matt was really interested to know what Gabe had in mind as a punishment.
“Oh, yes.”
The growly threat—or promise—was having a similar effect on Matt’s dick.
Matt looked down at his plate. He hadn’t seemed to have made much of an impact on

the mound of food in front of him.

“Oh, for… We’ll get pizza later.” Gabe dug his wallet out and threw some money on

the table. “Come on. Let’s get the fuck out of here.” From the tent in his jeans, Gabe was
clearly aroused.

Matt swallowed hard. He’d run out of time. Either he put the brakes on now or he took

that step into the unknown with Gabe.

“Is everything all right, Gabe?” Lucia hurried towards them, looking worried.
With obvious reluctance, Gabe dragged his attention away from Matt to look at the

maître d’. “Everything’s fine, Lucia. Sorry, we have to go. I promise to make it up to you
another time, bella.”

“You’d better.” Lucia didn’t look mollified. “You’re giving me a bad name, running out

with Mamma’s special uneaten.”

“Next time,” he promised and looked down at Matt who was still frozen in his seat.

“You coming?” He held out his hand.

Matt got to his feet, drawn by the promise in Gabe’s grey eyes. Gabe’s hand was warm,

his long fingers clasping around Matt’s hand. “Take me home,” he begged.

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Chapter Six




“Where do you want to go? Your place or mine?” Gabe asked as they walked towards

his car.

“Mine will do.” Matt felt being in his own home might give him a slight advantage.
“I hope you’ve changed the sheets since the last time I was in your bedroom. I’m not

sure I can pound you into the mattress with Bart Simpson’s face staring up at me.” Gabe
grinned at Matt over the roof of the car.

“Ha ha,” Matt said sourly. He had changed the sheets as it happened, but only because

it was the day to do laundry and not in anticipation of Gabe pounding him through the mattress.
A pornographic slideshow of Gabe doing exactly that invaded his mind.

“Matt?”
“Huh?” Matt looked across at Gabe.
The policeman’s lips twitched as if he knew exactly what Matt had been thinking about

and the flush that Matt felt cover his face didn’t help.

“Shall we go and see if Bart’s going to stare at me?” Gabe gestured into the car. “Or we

could stand here all night and you could tell me exactly what you were thinking about to
produce that delicious blush.”

The heat increasing in Matt’s face, he slid into the car without a word, ignoring Gabe’s

low chuckle. Bastard!

Matt swiftly realised that he didn’t need to give directions because Gabe had been to his

house twice. This was the first time Matt had actually invited him though, and the thought
gave Matt an edge of anticipation. He was almost shaking, both with nerves and excitement.
His sexual experience was limited to Milo, and a couple of drunken blow jobs while he’d still
been at school. What if Gabe thought he was crap? They hadn’t even kissed yet. Not really.
Just that short intense meeting of mouths the night before Milo had left.

Milo used to say he was awesome, normally when Matt’s mouth was wrapped around

his cock, but then Milo just liked the sound of his own voice.

“Hey.” For the second time in five minutes, Gabe’s voice interrupted his musings.

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Matt frowned as Gabe pulled over and switched off the engine. “Is something wrong?”
Gabe turned to face Matt. “I don’t know. You tell me. Is something wrong, Matt?”
“No. Why would you…?”
“Because you look terrified, that’s why. Look if this is too soon after Milo, it’s okay. I

don’t need to get my rocks off tonight. I can wait.”

Matt bit down on his lip hard, the bite of pain helping to quell the panic. “It’s not that. I

mean, yes, I’m nervous. I haven’t been with that many guys. Milo was my only real
boyfriend.”

“I’m no stud. And I’m a copper. I work long hours and hide my sexuality. I don’t go to

the local gay clubs. Even going to the gym is a risk,” Gabe pointed out.

“Why go to a gay gym then?”
“Because it’s away from my nick and I was sick of being hit on by the women at my last

place. They were nice enough but there are only so many ways I can say no without making
it obvious I’m queer.”

Matt snorted. “I can relate. I started going to the new one near the supermarket but the

women were a bit much. Mind you, the straight guys were always hitting on them. So when
were you last with someone?”

“Last year. It’s been a while. I wasn’t that bothered about finding anyone else until I

met you.”

The breath caught in Matt’s throat. “So you like me?”
“Don’t fish,” Gabe chided and leant forwards until his face was so close Matt had to

squint to focus. “I’m going to kiss you now, okay?”

Okay? Nervous or not, Matt was a heartbeat from yanking him into his arms. Gabe’s

mouth brushed his tentatively.

“Um.” Matt licked his lips.
“Fuck! You know what that does to me.” Gabe hauled Matt against him, and kissed him

more forcefully.

Matt melted into his arms, letting Gabe take control of the kiss, but giving himself up

totally. Gabe tasted of beer, and a lingering taste of Lucia’s. He closed his eyes and let his
senses lead the way. Gabe was a contradiction of hard muscle and soft mouth. His stubble
rasped against Matt’s chin but his hands were gentle as he caressed Matt’s jaw.

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Gabe pulled away too soon for Matt’s liking and when Matt chased after his mouth, he

shook his head. “We need to get to your place, now.” There was an edge of desperation to his
tone that Matt couldn’t miss.

Taking a deep breath, Matt nodded, although he was close to taking matters into his

own hands and offering to give Gabe a blow job there and then. But Gabe couldn’t risk being
caught and Matt wanted more than a blow job. He sat back and waited as Gabe restarted the
car and drove the remaining few roads to Matt’s house.

Matt’s hands shook as he opened his front door. He was acutely aware of Gabe’s

presence behind him, not touching, but making Matt’s nerve-ends tingle nonetheless. As
Matt pushed the door open, Gabe stopped him with one hand on his shoulder.

“Before we go any further, are you sure you want to do this? Are you really over Milo?”
Matt turned in his arms. “If I said that I wasn’t, you would walk away?”
Gabe stroked his cheek. “I’d leave you to sleep alone and chaste in your bed, and then

find the nearest dark place to wank.”

“But would you come back?” Matt asked worriedly.
“Yeah, you won’t get rid of me that easily.”
Reassured, Matt nodded. “Well, I’ve no intention of going to bed alone, so you’d better

get in here, because you promised to fuck me senseless, and if we stand here much longer the
old biddies will start gossiping.” He gave Gabe the filthiest grin he could muster. “Especially
when I do this.”

Matt shut the front door and sank to his knees, nuzzling the obvious bulge in Gabe’s

jeans. Anxious to taste Gabe, he started to undo Gabe’s belt buckle, but Gabe’s hands rested
on his.

“Wait, you don’t have to do this.”
Matt looked up in astonishment and a little impatience. “I’m old enough to make up my

own mind when I want to blow a guy. I’m not broken anymore, Gabe, and I want to suck
your dick.”

Gabe still didn’t move and Matt was about to give up when Gabe finally released his

hands. “Well, go on then.”

He laughed when Matt muttered, “Finally.”

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Matt ignored the laugh, concentrating on opening the jeans to get at Gabe. He nearly

lost it when he realised Gabe had gone commando. Gabe’s cock was as gorgeous as Matt
remembered from his brief glimpse in the shower—thick and long, framed by tight silver
curls at the base and a flared head already weeping from the slit. He leant forwards, hefting
it in his hand to appreciate its thickness and weight. A tug on his hair made him look up.
Gabe stared down at him with something like desperation.

“Much as I appreciate you taking things easy, I’d appreciate some action even more.”
“You were the one holding things up. Now you can wait for me to decide what to do.”

Matt wanted to take his time.

“You’re a tease,” Gabe accused, pushing his groin forward into Matt’s face.
Matt grinned at him. “Shut up, Gabe.” To emphasise his point he kissed the head of

Gabe’s cock.

“Do that again,” Gabe demanded, his voice husky, his fingers carding restlessly

through Matt’s hair.

“Like this?” Matt held Gabe in a firm grasp and repeated the action.
Gabe hummed his agreement, his fingers encouraging Matt to continue.
On his knees as he explored Gabe’s cock, Matt lost himself in the feel of his tongue over

the spongy head, his hand wrapped around the thick shaft. Above him, Gabe was vocal with
his enjoyment, but he didn’t try to nudge or push Matt where he wanted him, letting Matt
take the lead.

Matt sucked him in slowly, feeling the head of Gabe’s dick slide over his tongue. God, it

was so much better than his fantasies.

“You’re so good at this.” Gabe moaned.
Pleased by his open appreciation, Matt continued, teasing and sucking until he felt

Gabe’s thigh muscles tremble.

A tug on Matt’s hair was all that Gabe managed by way of warning that he was about

to come, then he stiffened and pulsed into Matt’s mouth. Matt swallowed around his cock,
suckling until the man was spent.

Matt sat back on his heels. He looked up to see Gabe leaning against the wall, his eyes

closed. As he watched, Gabe opened his eyes and smiled, taking Matt’s breath away. His hair

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tousled, Gabe looked as sexy as hell with his half-hard cock nestling in the V of his open fly.
Matt definitely wanted more than just a blow job.

“What can I do for you?” Gabe asked.
“What do you want to do?” Matt asked, his voice raw and hoarse.
Gabe tugged Matt to his feet, putting his arm around Matt’s waist to balance him.

“How about you show me your non-Bart Simpson bed and I suck your brains out of your
dick?” Matt didn’t know how to say that wasn’t enough but then Gabe pulled him in closer
and whispered, “Then, when we’ve recovered, I’m going to fuck you senseless.” Gabe
laughed at Matt’s moan. “Lead the way.”

It seemed odd to have Gabe in his bedroom now that Matt wasn’t under the covers

hiding from the world. This time a low light spilled across the two of them as he let Gabe
pull him so his back was against Gabe’s chest.

Gabe hummed and slid his hands under Matt’s T-shirt.
Matt closed his eyes as Gabe’s warm hands caressed his skin. “I’m not going to last long

if you keep doing that,” he gasped out.

The low chuckle in his ear made Matt’s toes curl again. “Hold on, and I’ll make it worth

your while. I’ll always make it worth your while.”

Matt bit back a whimper and let Gabe tease him with soft touches, pinching his nipples,

until Matt was squirming beneath his hands. “You can do what you like as long as you don’t
stop touching me.” He gasped as Gabe slipped his hand into his tracksuit bottoms.

“Like this, hmmm?” Gabe asked huskily as he stroked Matt’s dick.
“You promised me a blow job,” Matt reminded him, although the way Gabe was

jacking his dick, he didn’t really mind. The next thing he knew, Matt was on his bed, looking
up at the ceiling.

“Never let it be said I break my promises. Lift up.” Gabe tapped Matt’s hip. As Matt

obeyed, Gabe dragged his tracksuit bottoms and boxers along his thighs.

He sucked Matt’s dick in one smooth move that left Matt gasping on the brink of

orgasm.

“Oh, fuck!” Matt’s hips bucked up uncontrollably.
Gabe went with it, his reactions quick enough to avoid choking. He gripped Matt’s

hips, pushing him into the bed as he went down on Matt until his nose grazed the soft pubes.

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Eyes unfocused, Matt stared, dazed, up at the ceiling, his whole attention focused on

the hot, wet mouth around his dick. His orgasm was almost there, Matt wanted to hold on
just one moment more, to keep Gabe’s mouth on him, until he was ready to let go, but he was
too far gone, and he spilled into Gabe’s willing mouth with a shout.

He lay on the bed, his fingers absently tangling in Gabe’s silver hair as Gabe pressed his

face against Matt’s sweaty thigh. Eventually, it could have been minutes or hours, Matt had
no way of telling—Gabe raised his head.

“You okay?” he asked, a sweet smile on his face.
Matt smiled back. “More than all right,” he said. “Come up here?”
Gabe crawled up the bed and they faced each other. They were both still partially

dressed but Matt wasn’t in any hurry to move. He just needed to be close to Gabe. One of
Gabe’s hands rested on his hip and Matt slid his hand inside Gabe’s jeans to rest his hand on
Gabe’s thigh. Matt knew he could easily fall asleep like this, before anything else happened.
It didn’t really matter if they did. He would wake up in Gabe’s arms tomorrow, then they
could make love.

“What are you thinking?” Gabe asked, his voice low as if he didn’t want to break the

atmosphere of the dimly-lit room.

“That I could fall asleep,” Matt admitted sheepishly.
Gabe grinned. “Me too.” He leant forwards and kissed Matt gently on the lips. “Why

don’t we do that? I have plans for you, and you need to be well-rested for them.”

“We have work tomorrow,” Matt pointed out. Milo would have scoffed at his

practicality.

“Better get some sleep now then. We might need to get going early.”
Matt shivered at Gabe’s needy tone. Part of him wanted to get to tomorrow already, but

he was content to be where he was, and he dozed off to the sound of Gabe’s steady
breathing.

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Chapter Seven




A nuzzle to his neck disturbed Matt’s dream of Milo and Gabe fighting over him with

lightsabers. He grumbled in his sleep, and rolled over onto his side, wanting to get back to
his dream where Gabe was fighting for Matt’s honour and Milo was just fighting because he
hated pigs and was being a wanker. Even in his dreams Milo was a prick.

“Hmmm, are you going to wake up, or am I going to have to do a bit of DIY?”
Matt frowned. In his dream Gabe was still fighting Milo, and certainly wasn’t talking

about DIY. Matt turned his head in the direction of the voice and cracked opened his eyes,
blinking to clear away the sleep. It was still dark in his bedroom, which didn’t help matters.

Gabe grinned down at him. “Hi.”
“Ummm,” Matt managed, still half asleep.
“It’s time to wake up,”
“But you haven’t beaten Milo yet.”
“I haven’t?” Gabe looked confused. “Matt, what are you talking about?”
“You have to beat him with the lightsaber,” Matt said earnestly. “Milo’s just being a

dickhead, but you’re my hero.”

Gabe stroked Matt’s hair. “You’re not really awake yet, are you?”
Matt had to think about that for a moment. “Er, no?”
“Thought not. Tell you what, you just lie there and I’ll get us both undressed and wake

you up properly.” He switched on the small lamp on the bedside table.

“What time is it?” Matt asked.
“Five o’clock.”
“In the morning?”
Gabe sighed. “You’re not a lark, are you?”
“Not at arse o’clock, I’m not,” Matt grumbled.
The very small part of Matt that was happy with being awake got on board with the

fact that Gabe was stripping off his clothes. The man was hard and ready to play. Gabe
undressed Matt and straddled his thighs, leaning down for a slow, mind-melting kiss. He

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didn’t seem to care about morning breath, so Matt went with it, wrapping his arms around
Gabe’s neck and pulling him closer.

Gabe licked at Matt’s lips, seeking entrance but not pushing in. Matt moaned as he

opened his mouth. He appreciated the careful way Gabe was handling him but he wanted
more than that. He wanted Gabe to fuck him into the mattress now. Matt’s morning wood
was rubbing against Gabe’s in a very arousing way. Thrusting up against Gabe, Matt ground
their dicks together, needing to relieve some of the tension building in his body.

“Hmmm, you’re more awake now?” Gabe asked, rolling them over so that Matt was on

top.

Matt didn’t bother to reply, using the way his lips trailed down Gabe’s neck, scratchy

with morning stubble, as his answer. He drew a moan from Gabe as he bit lightly into the
skin, moving on to suck on his Adam’s apple.

“God, Matt, I need…more!” Gabe writhed underneath him, the dampness on his belly

indicating his arousal.

Matt smiled against the smooth skin of Gabe’s collarbone. Somewhere along the way

he’d gained some control in this encounter, and Matt liked that a lot. He was damn sure the
feeling was illusory though—Gabe wouldn’t give him the reins for very long. He was
distracted by a tap on his forehead.

“You’re thinking.”
“Huh?” Confused, Matt raised his head to look at Gabe.
“You stopped touching me. You’re thinking about something.”
Matt nodded. “Yeah, I was thinking that for once I can do what I like to you.”
He should have known that was a stupid thing to say because suddenly he was being

rolled again so that Gabe was straddling him.

Gabe looked down at him, one silver eyebrow raised and his grey eyes sparkling with

mischief. “Oh, yes? You think you’re the driver?” He emphasised his point by clasping both
their dicks in his large hand.

Matt couldn’t help thrusting into his hand, and was rewarded by a groan from Gabe at

the feel of their dicks sliding together.

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“You.” Gabe leant forwards again, and punctuated his word with a kiss. “Are.”

Another kiss. “Going to lie there.” More kisses, one for each word. Matt was breathless and
aching. “And let me fuck you senseless.”

“Yes, Gabe.”
“Yes, Gabe?” Matt got another raised eyebrow. “Is that it? No arguments?”
“You have my dick in your hand,” Matt pointed out. “You could ask for the world and I

would give it to you.” The words rushed out, breathy and needy, but Matt was on a knife-
edge, especially when the hand encompassing his cock squeezed a little tighter.

“I want to fuck you, Matt.” Gabe looked seriously at him.
“Please.” Matt had never wanted anything more.
Gabe leant down to kiss him again then grabbed the lube and condoms from the

bedside table. Matt spread his legs to allow Gabe to settle between them. He felt like he was
thrumming, so ready to be fucked that it would only take one touch to climax. At the first
touch of Gabe’s slick fingers at his hole, Matt gasped.

“Sorry. Is the lube cold?” Gabe asked.
Matt concentrated very hard on speaking rather than coming. “Yeah, but I’m so close to

this being all over.”

“You hold on,” Gabe said sternly.
“Yes, sir!” His sarcasm was lost in a moan, as Gabe’s fingers pressed into him.
Gabe spared him a long-drawn-out preparation, and soon he was pressing his cock into

Matt’s body. Matt’s eyes closed tightly as the initial burn bled away into a pleasure that was
overwhelming. If he looked at Gabe he was going to come. If he kissed Gabe he was going to
come. He tried to remember his seven times table—that was always a bitch—to draw himself
back from his climax.

“Christ!” Gabe’s voice sounded as strained as Matt felt. “You feel so tight.”
“It’s been a while,” Matt gasped out, digging his fingers into Gabe’s hips.
“Look at me.”
Matt had to force his eyes open at the order. Gabe’s face was tight and strained, sweat

beading across his forehead. He looked as close to the edge as Matt was.

“I want you to look at me as I fuck you,” Gabe said.

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“I can’t.” No one could stare in Gabe’s eyes and not be blinded by the want. It was scary

to be desired so much. Milo had never looked at him with so much need.

“You can,” Gabe insisted, with a thrust into him for emphasis, and pushing away all

thoughts of Milo. Gabe gathered Matt’s legs over his shoulders and thrust in again, deep and
smooth into his channel, making Matt gasp.

The feel of Gabe inside him was almost too much—almost—but Gabe didn’t move until

Matt relaxed, and that seemed like permission to fuck because Gabe pulled out until the head
of his cock was stretching Matt’s hole, then punched in again. He repeated his action. Matt
just held on, letting Gabe take him for the ride. Gabe’s dick pegged his prostate and Matt
yelled, bringing a look of satisfaction to Gabe’s face. Throwing his hands back, Matt grabbed
onto the headboard, needing something solid to hang onto. He was dripping with sweat, his
orgasm was right there in front of him and his balls were drawn up so tightly they ached. He
wanted…no, he needed to touch his cock, to release the pressure, but his hands were locked
around the spindles.

“Gabe, please.”
That was all he needed because as Gabe touched his cock Matt yelled, arching his back

as he spurted sticky ropes over his belly and chest. He clamped down hard on Gabe’s cock
and that triggered Gabe’s own climax. Gabe pumped into him furiously, extending Matt’s
orgasm and leaving him totally drained.

Matt couldn’t quite control the wince even though Gabe pulled out carefully.
Gabe frowned. “Did I hurt you?”
“Not much,” Matt hastened to assure him.
Once he’d disposed of the condom, Gabe crawled back onto the bed and lay down next

to Matt in the wrecked sheets. He smelt of sweat and sex, and Matt buried his nose in Gabe’s
skin to soak it up.

“Are you sniffing me?” Gabe asked, amusement evident in his voice.
“You’re always complaining that I stink. Now it’s your turn.”
Huffing, Gabe turned to face him. Matt mimicked his position, one of his hands resting

lightly on Gabe’s chest. He saw the frown on Gabe’s face. Worry formed a knot in the pit of
his stomach.

“What’s the matter?” Matt asked.

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“I hurt you,” Gabe said.
Matt stroked Gabe’s cheek. “I told you, it’s been a while since I had sex. Even before

Milo left. And it’s a good hurt.”

“Are you sure?”
Matt really wanted to see the frown disappear. “You just fucked my brains out. Do you

see me complaining?” He was pleased to feel the tension leave Gabe’s muscles. “What did I
say about thinking I’m broken?” he chided gently.

Gabe took Matt’s hand and pressed it against his cheek. “I’m sorry. I just worry about

you.”

“Less worrying, more fucking,” Matt insisted, reaching over to give him a kiss.
“Oh, I can do that,” Gabe agreed. He raised his head to look at the clock. “But not now.

I have to go to work.” He rolled out of bed. “Is it okay if I have a shower?”

“Help yourself,” Matt said, unashamedly watching Gabe scratch his belly. He wanted

to lick the long, red lines. He suddenly remembered being in the shower in the gym, trying
not to be caught staring at Gabe.

“Want to join me?” Gabe asked.
Matt could think of worse things to do with his morning. He got up, and eagerly went

into Gabe’s outstretched arms. Gabe sneaked his hand into Matt’s hair, drawing him closer
for a kiss. Matt closed his eyes, sinking into the feel of Gabe’s mouth on his.

“You’re right,” Gabe murmured after a while.
“I know,” Matt agreed although he didn’t have a clue to what he was agreeing.
Gabe’s mouth trailed down Matt’s neck, setting off the nerve endings. “We stink.”
Matt collapsed into helpless laughter in Gabe’s arms. When he’d recovered his

composure he grinned at Gabe. “I’m going to be spending a fortune in shower gel, aren’t I?”

“If you’d spent as much time as me wrestling the great unwashed you’d be obsessed

with being clean,” Gabe groused.

“Yeah, yeah. Come on.” Matt led Gabe into the bathroom. When the room had filled

with steam, he pushed Gabe gently into the shower, hearing him moan in appreciation of the
hot, hot water.

“I might just move in here with a shower like this,” Gabe said as the water plastered his

silver hair to his scalp.

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TUMBLING BLINDLY

Sue Brown

www.total-e-bound.com

62

Matt raised one eyebrow, a gesture totally lost on Gabe as he had his eyes closed.

“You’d move in here just for my shower?”

“And your arse.”
“Thanks,” Matt said dryly. “You make me feel so wanted.”
Gabe opened one eye. “I have twenty minutes before I have to leave. Want me to show

you just how much I want you?”

As Gabe’s hand was already cupping Matt’s arse, Matt figured he didn’t have an

option. He pressed Gabe into the tiles, pulling him down for a kiss.

“I want you to show me,” he agreed, gasping into Gabe’s mouth as Gabe slowly fisted

Matt’s cock. He rose up on his toes. “Oh fuck, Gabe, oh fuck.”

“Sounds like a good idea to me.”
“You’re going to be late for work.”
Even with his brain concentrating on other things, Matt worried about being punctual.
“I’m never late. You think I can’t make you come before the hot water runs out?” Gabe

said smugly, swiping his thumb over the head of Matt’s dick.

“Oh fuck!” Matt said again, all thoughts of work and punctuality flying out of his head.

“I need you to fuck me now.”

Gabe gave a low, filthy chuckle in Matt’s ear, his wickedly clever fingers sliding behind

Matt’s balls. “Maybe I can be late just this once, hmm?”

Matt moaned as Gabe teased his hole. He wanted to answer, he really did, but at that

moment he was just waiting for the delicious feel of Gabe sinking into his body. He closed
his eyes and concentrated on the feel of the water running over his face, of Gabe’s fingers
penetrating him. Nothing else mattered except this moment.


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TUMBLING BLINDLY

Sue Brown

www.total-e-bound.com

63

Epilogue




Milo had left on a Tuesday. Every time Matt wheeled the dustbin down the path, he

remembered that, like a bruise that he kept touching just to see if it hurt. But that memory
was overlaid by happier ones, such as the day Gabe kissed him for the first time, or the day
they made love—blow jobs counted, right?

Matt smiled at the world as he stuck the bin outside the gate before going to work. Gabe

was going to call him later before he started his shift and that always made him happy. He
looked up to see Mrs Morris from number forty-four staring at him over the top of the hedge.

“Morning,” he said cheerfully, giving her a wave.
She looked startled, and Matt realised it was probably the first time he had ever

willingly initiated a conversation with her.

“Good morning,” she said, sounding a little hesitant.
“It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?” he continued.
Matt could see the confusion in her expression, then she said, “You look very happy

today, Mr Collins.”

“It’s a Tuesday, and the sun is shining.”
“You like Tuesdays?” His neighbour looked rather startled.
Matt grinned at her, knowing he sounded like an idiot. “Only some of them, Mrs

Morris. Today is one of the best Tuesdays.”

She gave him a tentative grin back. “Yes, it is. Today is a good Tuesday.”




Also available from Total-E-Bound Publishing:

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Welcome Home

P.F. Whitney

Excerpt

Chapter One


Devry Fincher moved swiftly around his kitchen, chopping vegetables and tossing

them into a skillet, savouring the sizzling sound that floated through the room. It was
Sunday morning—the only day of the week he was able to cook breakfast for himself and his
lover of two years, Holden Reid. Devry was an investment banker who found, more often
than not, he had to work on Saturdays while everyone else he knew were able to enjoy the
day off. Sundays were set aside for just him and Holden to relax and do nothing except enjoy
each other’s company.

Devry stepped back over to the cutting board then swept the bits and ends of unused

vegetables from the surface into his hand and turned towards the trash can. He lifted the lid
and, as he dropped the pieces into the black plastic container, he squinted his eyes at a semi-
crumpled piece of paper, the words ‘Family Reunion’ clearly visible. He grabbed the paper
and quickly straightened it as best he could. He read the typed letter then frowned and
turned his gaze to the ceiling.

Devry climbed the stairs to his bedroom. He stopped in the doorway and smiled at the

man sleeping soundly on his stomach. The light grey top sheet covered him just to his waist,
leaving the broad expanse of his bare, muscular back available to view. Inhaling deeply, he
walked into the bedroom, wanting to wake Holden, but not wanting to scare the living hell
out of him in the process.

“Holden,” he murmured, crinkling his eyebrows when Holden didn’t even move an

inch. He walked to the end of the bed and lifted the sheet from the sleeping man’s left foot.
With a grin, Devry tickled it.

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Holden groaned and lifted his head from the pillow, not opening his eyes. He inhaled

deeply before speaking, “I don’t smell coffee.” He rolled onto his back, both feet
disappearing beneath the sheet. He looked amused as he opened his eyes.

Devry held up the piece of paper. “Why’d you throw this away?”
“Because I’m not going and it’s trash.”
“You don’t want to see your family?”
Holden folded his arms beneath his head, hazel eyes not leaving his lover. “Not

especially.”

“But what if I do?”
“Why would you?” Holden shot back.
Devry crawled onto the bed, straddling Holden’s lap as he looked down at him.

“Maybe because you’ve met all my family and I’ve yet to meet yours. You’ve seen where I
come from, but you haven’t afforded me the same courtesy. Or maybe it’s because—”

“All right, all right, I get the point,” Holden interrupted with a smile on his face.
Devry raised an eyebrow. “So we’ll go?”
Sighing, Holden nodded. “Yeah. We’ll go see my family. God help us.” He willingly

accepted the kiss Devry gave him. He drew in a deep breath. “What’s burning?”

“Oh shit!” Devry shouted as he got to his feet, before taking off out of the room, leaving

his lover chuckling to himself.

* * * *


The smell of scorched food hung heavily in the kitchen as Devry filled two plates with

the second breakfast he had cooked to replace what had burned. He strained to listen as
Holden spoke low into his cell phone in the living room. Devry set the red skillet, which had
been filled with eggs, back onto the stove. He grabbed the two plates and made his way into
the living room. He looked at his lover while setting the plates on the coffee table. Sitting on
the couch, Devry turned to Holden when he groaned and put his head back.

“Mom, I don’t care what Gramps is gonna say. The only way I am gonna stay with you

is if Devry is there as well.” He paused and listened, lifting his head, turning his attention to
Devry, the look on his face conveying the apology he couldn’t give at the moment. “Fine.

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We’ll see you on Saturday, then.” Holden ended the call and threw his phone onto one of the
chairs on the opposite the couch.

“You all right?” Devry asked as he grabbed his fork and plate.
Holden sighed, running his hand over his face and exhaling deeply. “Apparently my

grandfather had to move in with my parents and they never told him about us. My mom’s
worried about how he’ll react to you and I sharing a room.”

“Well… I can stay in a hotel if it’ll make things easier,” Devry replied with a shrug.
Holden grabbed his fork and plate, shaking his head. “I don’t think so. For eighteen

months, we have slept side by side and that’s not gonna change because of my grandfather.”

“Holden, I just want to meet your family, not cause some huge uproar.”
Holden leaned over and gently pressed his lips to Devry’s. “You are a part of my family

and if they can’t deal with that, fuck ‘em.”

Both men smiled and began eating their breakfast.



Get your copy now

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About the Author

Sue Brown is owned by her dog and two children. When she isn’t following their

orders, she can be found plotting at her laptop. In fact she hides so she can plot and

has got expert at ignoring the orders.

Sue discovered M/M erotica at the time she woke up to find two men kissing on her

favourite television series. The series was boring; the kissing was not. She may be late

to the party, but she’s made up for it since, writing fan fiction until she was brave

enough to venture out into the world of original fiction.

Email:

suebrown.stories@gmail.com

Sue loves to hear from readers. You can find her contact information, website and

author biography at

http://www.total-e-bound.com

.


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