UNPLUGGED
ThestoryofQuinn&Merritt
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EditedbyLisaChristman,AdeptEdits
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TableofContents
Dedication
Crystal,thankyouforallthatyoudo.Thisone’sforyou,babe.
Chapter1
Quinn
Slowly, I creep up the snow-packed driveway, thankful that I have my new Jeep to navigate the
slipperyterrain.AsIputtheSUVinpark,Tedopensmydoor,hisadorablegreeneyessparklingin
thelastoftheeveningsunlight.
“Fancynewcaryougothere,”hesays.Tedismybestfriend,Willow’s,husband.
“Why,thankyou.Ididsignthebiggestclientmyofficehadthisyear.”HetakesmyhandasI
steadymyself,plantingtwofeetfirmlyontheicyground.Achillrunsthroughme,andIzipmycoat.
“God,it’scold.”
“Butbeautiful,”hesays,andwebothlookupattheshimmeringwhiteflakescomingdownhard.
“Comeon,let’sgetinside.”
I nod and open my rear door, handing him my bag. Then we walk up to the gorgeous winter
retreatthatWillow’sbrother,Ari,rentedfortheweek.Everyyearheputstogetheroneofthesetrips,
andit’swhatIlookforwardtomostinthewintertime.It’sthesamegroupofpeopleeveryyear,and
we’ve all become like family. Most of us went to college together and now meet to spend time
catchingup,skiing,andsnowboardingsomewhereintheRockyMountainsofColorado.It’snotfar
from where I live in Denver, and with how crazy my job and life can be at times, especially as the
holiday’sapproach,Icanalwaysusethetimeaway…thisyearinparticular.
TedandIkickthesnowfromourbootsasWillowandKamigreetusatthedoor.“OhmyGod!”
both girls exclaim. “You look so adorable,” Kami tells me and gives me a tight hug, followed by
Willow.
“Thisplaceisstunning,”Isaytothem.
“Isn’tit?Arididawesomethisyear.Comeon,letusshowyoutoyourroom.”
Kami’sboyfriend,Jacob,andAriarezonedoutontheTV,watchingsomesportsgame.“Hey
guys,”IsayasIwalkbyandtheybothnodtheirheadsfollowedbyasimultaneous,“What’sup?”
“Awesomeplace,Ari.Thankyou.”
“Noproblem,”hesays,stillfocusingontheTV,andthegirlsshowmearoundandthentakeme
upstairs.Asweheaddownthehall,it’sclearArihasthemaster;he’spayingafterall.
“So,hereyouare,”Willowsaysopeningthedoortotherustic-inspiredbedroom,withtwotwin
bedsmadeoutofrealtrees.MyroomisrightacrossfromherandTed,andnexttoKamiandJacob’s
room,sowe’reallsandwichedintogether.
“Wow,I’mtotallygonnafeellikealittlekidsleepinginhere,”ItellWillowandKami,asIplop
down on the couch in the room to take my boots off. My bag is already by the door. Ted is such a
sweetie.
“So,howareyouholdingup?”Willowasksme.
“I’mokay,”Itellher,thetearsalreadyprickingthebackofmythroat,andeventhoughItryand
pushthemaway,it’shard.Kamigivesmeahugehug,andthroughanexasperatedsigh,Isay,“I’mnot
evensurewhyI’mupset.”
“Breakupsarealwayspainful,babe.”
Andtheyare,eventhoughmyexandIwereonlytogetherforahandfulofmonths,itwasafast
andfuriousromance.He’sthatbigclientIsignedthroughmywork,andheliterallysweptmeoffmy
feet.Flyingmearoundeveryweekendtobewithhimaswetraveledallover,andIjustwentwithit.I
completelyletmyguarddownandintheprocessmademyselfvulnerable.Itreallywasanawesome
fewmonthsofmylife.UntilthedayhebrokeupwithmeforreallynoreasonthatIcouldsee.The
painofthinkingaboutitisstillsohardtohandle.Myrelationshipsalwaysseemtoendbadly,thisone
included,whichmakesmefeellikethereissomethingwrongwithme.I’mreallyhopingwiththistrip
Icanletitgo,evenifonlyforthisweek.
“Haveyouheardfromhimatall?”Kamiasks.
“No,thankGod.I’msurehe’smovedon,”Itellthegirls,andI’msurehehas.
“Well,Isayyouforgetallaboutthatdouchebag,”Willowsays,andIsmile,changingintoapair
ofsweats.
“I’dlovenothingmorethantoforgetabouthim.”
“What do you ladies say, let’s make this the best week ever? We are going to be completely
relaxed,calm,andunpluggedfromtheworld,okay?”Shelooksatmewiththatlook,andIknowwhat
shemeans.Itakemycellphonefrominsidemypurse.I’mreluctanttohandittoher…butI’maware
oftherulesonthesetrips…soIdo.
KamiandWillowhugme.Willowlooksintomyeyes,readingme,knowingmesodamnwell.
“Letitallgo,babe.Thisisafreshstart!”
“Iwill.Thankyoubothforpickingmyassup.”
“Ofcourse.Meetyadownstairs?”
“Yeah,I’mjustgonnausethebathroomrealquick.”
After I finish, I stare back at my reflection in the mirror. My dark blue eyes are tired and my
stragglycaramel colored hairis a mess.Christ, work really kickedmy ass thisweek. I never knew
managingotherpeople’smoneycouldbesomuchwork.NowthatI’vebeenpromotedtoInvestment
Advisorwithinahugefinancialfirm,IrealizehoweasyIhaditbefore.
ThesnowmademyhairsuchanunmanageablesnarlthatallIcandoisusethehairbandfrom
mywristtoholditinamessyponytail.
Mywoolsweaterlooksridiculouswithmygraysweats,soItakeitoff,thengoanddigthrough
mybagforsomethingmorecomfortableandlessitchytowear.OneofthethingsIloveaboutthese
tripsisjustbeingabletochillandrelaxandnotcarehowIlook.Ariislikeabigbrothertome,and
theotherguysaretaken,soIhavenoonetolookgoodfor.
Suddenlythedooropens.“Hereyouare,man,”Arisays,walkinginwithanunfamiliarguy,and
Iscrambletocovermybreasts.
“Whatthefuck,Ari?”Iyell,andbothheandthenewguygawkatme.Lookingbackathissexy
face,I’mnotsurewhattodo,soIstormintothebathroomandpullwhatevert-shirtI’mholdingover
myhead.ThenIstandtheretryingtodecideifIshouldwalkout.OrmaybeIshouldwaitforsomeone
toknock.Arisaid,“Hereyouare?”Whatdoeshemean?Thisismyroom!Whoisthatguy?
“Quinn?”Willowcallsoutandlightlyrapsonthedoor.Iopenit,andshesays,“Youokay?”
“I’mfine.Whatthefuckisgoingon,though?”
“I’m sorry, Ari invited a friend of his. They used to work together. He didn’t think he was
coming…buthe’shere.”
“Andhe’sstayinginmyroom?”
“Well,ifyou’reokaywiththat.Butifnot,Icanseeifhecansleeponthecouchorsomething?”
“No, don’t do that. I don’t want to cause any drama.” Ari puts this all together and is so cool
aboutpayingforeverything.“He’shisfriend;I’llbefine.”
“Areyousure?”sheaskswithafrownonherface.
“I’msure.”Wewalkoutintothebedroom.Ontheflooratthedooristheguy’sbag.Ifollow
Willowdownstairs,andasIlookaroundateveryone,Ispothimbullshittingwiththeguys.He’sgot
messy brown hair and muscles for days. He senses me coming down and looks at me, making my
heartthud.IglanceawaylikeIdidn’tnotice,butIcanfeelhiseyesstillonme.Hekeepstalkingtothe
guysbutwatchingme.
“Ineedadrink,”ItellWillow.Mynervesareshot,havingthetwoofthemwalkinonmelike
that.ThankfullyKamiismakingsomesortofconcoctioninthekitchen.She’sourresidentmixologist
—literally—sheworkedatahigh-endcocktailbarwhenwewereallincollege,andyoucanalways
countonhertomakethebestdrinks.
“Hereyouladiesgo,”shesays,passingussomefoofypinkdrinks.
“Hey,Merritt,youwantabeer,man?”Ariaskshim.
“Sure,”hesaysandwalksintothekitchen,stoppingrightnexttome.
Iswallow,sippingonmydrink,gazingoff,notsurewhyI’msonervous.Minusthefactthathe
sawmytits,Idon’tevenknowhim.
“Hey,I’mMerritt,sorryaboutearlier.”
“It’s all good.” I sip on my drink again as he extends his hand to me. I look down at it for a
momentandcompletelyclamup.“You’resupposedtoshakeit,”hewhispers,leaningintomyear.He
smellsgood,andhiswarmbreathonmyskinmakesmetightenmypussy.
Ichucklealittletomyself,thentakehishandinmine.“I’mQuinn,”Itellhim.
“It’snicetomeetyou,”hesays,hisbrowneyesdancinginthelowlightofthekitchen.
“Hereyougo,man,”Arisaysandhandshimabeer.“Youtwogetachancetomeetyet?”heasks
us.
“Yeah,” I respond, watching Merritt’s lips and the way they mold around the end of the beer
bottle,eyesstillwatchingme.God,Idon’tknowwhatitis,buthe’ssohotandalluringtome,whichis
thelastthingIneedrightnow.Ican’thelpbutthinkbythewayhe’slookingatmethatasmuchasI
wanted this week to be about myself and relaxing, he’s going to make that very hard—if not
impossible—toaccomplish.
Chapter2
Merritt
“Whatareyoudoing?”Willowasksme,inasternwarden-liketone.
Glancingupatherfrommyphone,alittleconfusedbyherquestion,“Jussssstworkin’alittle.”
“Ari,didyounottellhimabouttherule?”
Rule?
“Oh,Itoldhim,”hesays,grabbinganotherbeerfromthefridge,buthedefinitelydidn’ttellme
aboutanyrules.
“So,what,sincehe’syourfriend,you’regonnalethimkeepit?”
Keepwhat?
Arirollshiseyesathissister,andIreallyhavenocluewhattheyaretalkingabout.Tedleans
overandsays,“I’dgiveheryourphonenow,ifitwasme.”
Whatthefuck?
Willowoutstretchesonehandtome,withherotherplacedonherhip,andI’minshock.Isshe
forreal?I’mworkingonathreehundred-million-dollardeal,andshewantsmyphone?“I’llstayoff
it,”Itellherandplaceitinmypocket.
Theroomeruptsintochaos,everyoneyellingandarguing.Well,everyone,exceptforQuinn.
She’ssittinginherchairsmirking,sippingonherthirdpinkgirlydrink.Sounbelievablygorgeous
thatIcouldfuckher,righthereandrightnow,infrontofeveryone.Sheshrugshershouldersatme,
andIaskher,“Didyouhavetogiveyoursup?”
ShenodsandIlookattheceilingcontemplatingmyoptions.I’veneverbeenwithoutmyphone
—it’smylifelinetomyjob,andmyjobismylife,sotheygohandinhand.“CanIjustsendthislast
email?”IaskWillowandreachintomypocket,butshesnatchesitoutofmygriplikeit’sastackof
cash,andIgetupfeelinglikeI’mstuckinahousewithabunchofcrazypeople.Whycan’twehave
phones?AsIgrabanotherbeer,Arihollersovertome,“You’llbefine,man,trustme.”Ifliphimoff.
Outofeveryone,heshouldknowhowimportantmyphoneistome.
The girls all begin to clean up from dinner, and without my phone, I find myself watching
Quinn. And it’s not because she’s the only single girl here, it’s because I’ve never seen a chick so
confident.Wearingapairofsweatsandat-shirt,withherhairpulledup.
“Youknowyougotthatdealinthebag,”Arisays,bringingmebacktothemoment.
“Howdoyouknow?”
“I’veheardthroughthegrapevine,man,”hesays,andwhatAriknowsistypicallythetruthin
ourbusiness.
“Well, nothing’s done until it’s done. Plus, you know my dad will freak if I don’t close it. He
didn’tevenwanttoletmetakethisweekoff.”
“Fuckyouroldman.Yougottakeephimouttayourheadwhenyou’reworking.”
Inod,hearingAri’swords,butactuallylisteningtothemisanentirelydifferentthing.Mydad
ownsthecompanyIworkfor,whichisaveryprominentoilandgasbusinesswithofficesalloverthe
US.Ariusedtoworkforhimtooandlefttojoinacorporatevenue.NowIrunthewesternUS,and
thedealI’mworkingonistoexpandintoCanada,whichwouldmakeusoneofthetopthreelargest
USproducersofoilinNorthAmerica.Quinn’slaughechoesthroughthehouse,pullingmeoutofmy
mindfuckandbacktoher.
“So,what’sthedealwiththatchick,Quinn?”Iasktheguys.
“She’s Willow’s best friend, has been for years. She’s like family,” Ari says as Jacob is
shufflingadeckofcards.“Youpussiesbringyourwallets?”
AlthoughAriinadvertentlyleftoutthewhole“nocellphone”thing,hedidtellmeaboutthis.
Everynightisgamenight,mostofwhichinvolvesanactualcashpoolforthewinner.
“Yeah,letmegograbsomecash,”Icall,walkingupstairstogetmywalletoutofmybag.Igo
into the room I’m staying in and chuckle at the small beds. I didn’t notice them before. Probably
‘causeallInoticedwereQuinn’stits,butI’mnotsureifI’llevenfit.
Diggingthroughmybag,IfindmyiPad.
Fuckyeah!
Thetemptationistoogreattoresist,andItakeitintothebathroom.Ipoweritupandhopeit
getsserviceuphere.I’msureitwillifmyphonedid.Sureenough,itdoes,andasIscrollthroughmy
emails, I’ve already received six new ones, on a Friday night no less. As I begin to read them, I’m
startledbyQuinnasshebargesintothebathroom,andIfreeze,lookingatherinthereflectionofthe
mirror.
“Shit,I’msorry,”shesays,butsmirkswhensheseesmyiPad.
“It’sallgood.I…I…”Istall,notsurehowtoexplainmyself.SheandWillowaretight,soI’m
sureshe’sonhersidewhenitcomestothiswholenophonething.
She looks down at my iPad and says, “You better not let Willow catch you on that thing.”
Standingnexttome,shesetsasmallbagonthecounterandunzipsit.
“Icanleave,”Itellher.
“No, you’re fine. I mean, we are going to be sleeping together.” She takes out a contact lens
case,andIcan’tfocusonanythingelse,exceptforherwords.“Notlikethat,”shesays.Inod,going
backtofocusingonmyemail.Beingthisclosetoher,alone,hasmymindonotherthings.Goddamn,
shesmellssogood;she’sverydistracting.“What’ssoimportantonthereanyway?”
“Fuckingwork,”Itellher,andwhenIthinkaboutit,IrealizethatIhatethatitrunsmylife,butit
does,andI’mnotsurehowtochangethat.
“Whatdoyoudoforaliving?”sheasksme.
“I’minoilandgas.You?”
“Investmentadvisor.”Nice,she’sgotherprioritiesincheck,that’sforsure.
“So,nowifeorgirlfriend?”sheasksme.
“No,you?”
“Wifeorgirlfriend?”shegapesbackatme,holdingoneofhercontactsonherfinger.
“YouknowwhatImean.”
“No,thankGod.”
“What’sthatmean?”Iaskher,alittleoffendedbyherremark.
“Nothing,it’sjust…Iwaswiththisguyforabit,andheturnedouttobeatotalass.Let’sjustsay
itdidn’tendwellandleftasourtasteinmymouthwhenitcomestomen.”
“I’msorry,”Itellherassheslidesonapairofglasses.
“It’s all good, it’s not your fault. This vacation is not about the past, Merritt, it’s about
unwinding and letting go…” She trails off as her eyes get wide thinking about something, and I
wonderwhathappenedtoher.Whatdidherexdothatmadehersoanti-men?Sherecoversandlooks
down at my iPad, so I lock it. “I’m sure the whole no electronics thing seems crazy, but you really
should try it. Once you’re unplugged from the world, it’s refreshing.” She goes to leave the
bathroom, passing me close enough that I smell fresh rain and something else, the combination
comingfromherskinmakesmycocktwitch.Thenshelicksherlips—suchatease—andbreezespast
me.Herscentandhermouth,God,Ifuckingloveit,Iwantit.
Grabbingmywallet,IdropmyiPadinmybagandheadbackdownstairsforsomethingelseto
drink,somethingstronger,somethingthatwilltametheanimalinsideofmethatQuinnistempting.
Becauserightnow,forsomereason,thischickhasmyheadspinning,andIhavenocluewhy.Notthat
I’mcomplaining,‘causeshe’shotashell,andI’dlovetofuckher.Butshe’sfreshoffabreakupand
doesn’twantanythingtodowithmen.SoforonceI’llsparemyself.
Chapter3
Quinn
“Areyouguysready?”Kamiasksassheholdsuptheboxforsomenewgamethatshe’sbrought.The
guysallgripe,notlikingtobetaughtsomethingnew,butshequietstheircomplaintsbysaying,“Stop
it…you’veallplayedUNO,right?”
“Yeah,whenIwasinkindergarten,”Arigrumbles.Sheignoreshimandemptiesthecontentsof
theboxontothetable.Inthecenterofthecoffeetableisallofourcontributionstothepot,whichI
reallyhopeIwin.Lasttrip,Iwonfiveoutofthesixpots.
MerrittcomesintothelivingroomwithaglassofwhatlookslikeScotchoniceinhishand.He
mustreallyhatenothavinghisphone.
“YoumindifIsithere?”heasksme,andIshakemyhead,tuckingmyfeetfurtherunderneath
me.AsIleanonthearmofthecouch,Kamiisramblingaway,andIfindmyeyeswandering,taking
inglimpsesofMerritt.He’smuscular,butnottoobig,clean-shavenandhishairlookslikehejustran
hisfingersthroughit.Thesleevesofhisblackdressshirtarerolledup,andhisthighsarestraining
the fabric of his jeans. Biting my bottom lip, I look at his cock, and Jesus, it’s... “Any questions?”
Kamiasksus.Iblinkwildly,likeakidonthefirstdayofschoolthathasn’tacluewhattodo.
Merrittpassesmeablankcardandatinymarker,andIlookatit,perplexed.Peekingaroundthe
room,everyoneiswritingontheircards,andIwhispertoMerritt,“WhatdoIdo?”
“Writearuleorsomething.”
“Arule?”
“Yeah,likesomethingthepersonhastodothatpicksthecard.”
“Canitbeanything?”
“Ithinkso.”
“Whatdidyouput?”Iaskhim.
“I’m not telling; she said not to.” He covers his card, and I sigh in frustration. I have no clue
whattowrite.Theonlythingsthatcometomindarejustdirty.Whatiswrongwithme?Aseveryone
hands her back their cards, I go with it; no one will know I wrote it, right? Remove one piece of
clothing,jewelryexcluded.
Kamicollectsthecardsandthenpassesoutourhands.“God,Ifeellikeakid,”Aricomplains.
“Trustme,man,thisoneisfun,”Jacobchimesin.“IhadKamisuckingmycocktheothernight
oneveryotherhand.”Shehitshimonthebackofthehead,andwealllaughassheblushes,obviously
stillthinkingabouttheirgame.
OhGod,didsomeoneputacardlikethatinthere?
Asweworkaroundtheroom,playingatraditionalgameofUNO,Ibegintothinkthisisn’tso
bad,butmyeyesareonthelittlemachinethatsitsinthemiddleofthetablewhichhasourcardsall
insideofit,andIwonderwhat’llhappenwhenwehavetouseit.ThenWillowlaysdownacardthat
has a picture of the machine and grabs the lever. The entire room silences, telling me that no one
wroteanythingniceontheircards.
Asshespinsthetinyslotmachine-likedevice,wewaitforittostopandwhenitdoes,sheasks,
“Whatdoesthatmean?”It’sgotapictureofablankblackcardonitwithaquestionmark.
“Oh,thatonemeansyoupullacardanddowhateveritsays,”Kamitellsher.
“ButIthoughtyousaidthatwecouldchoosewhohadtodoit.”
“Ifitgivesyouthatoption,thenyeah.Butitdidn’t.”
“Justpullthecard,babe,”Tedtellsher,andreluctantlyshedoes,rollinghereyesandbeingall
dramatic.Withthecardinherhand,she’sjustlookingatit,notsayingaword.
“Whatdoesitsay?”Ifinallyask,hatingthesuspense.
“Makeoutwithanyoneintheroomforoneminute.”
“Whoputthatoneinthere?”Iask,andKamisays,“WereyoulisteningtoanythingIsaidatall?
Itoldyou,you’renotallowedtosay.”
WillowdropsthecardonthetableandgrabsaholdofthesidesofTed’sshirtasshewhipsher
hairaround.Igiggle,whatisshea1980’spornstar?Thensheclimbsontopofhislapandbeginsto
kisshim.AsIfinishmydrink,Merrittasksme,“Youwantanotherone?”
“Sure.”Hegetsup,andIfollowhimintothekitchen.“Didyouwritethat?”Iaskhim.
“No,Ithoughtyoudid.”
IsmirkandawkwardlylookatWillowwhoisstillgoingatitwithTed.Hishandsareonher
hips,thenKamiyells,“Time.”Andtheyslowlystop.
“Whowouldyoukiss,ifyoupulledthatcard?”Merrittasksme,refillingmyglass.
Sippingonmydrink,Ilookaroundtheroom,filledwithallofmyclosestfriendsandknowmy
optionsarelimited.Reallyit’sAriorMerritt,andAriislikeabrothertome,andIbetMerrittknows
that,sohe’sexpectingmetosayhim.Ilookupathim,andhewinksatme.Thatishiscard.
Sonofabitch!
“It’sahardchoicebetweenWilloworKami,maybeboth!”Hismouthdropsopen,andIstrutoff
tothecouch.WhenIsitdown,he’sstillstandingintheexactspotIlefthim,watchingme.
Heshakeshisheadwithasmirkonhisface.“SowhatdoIlaydown?”IaskasWillow’sblue
cardwiththemachineisonthetopofthedeck.
“You’vegottoeithermatchthepictureorcolor.”Lookingatmyhand,Ihaveonecardwitha
machineonit,butI’mnotabouttomakethatmove,notuntilIseewhatelsethesecrazyfuckershave
writtendown.Merrittsitsbackdownnexttome,andIlayabluesix,thenArilaysdownthedreaded
cardwiththefuckingwheelonitagain,andhespinsthemachine.Thistimeit’sgotthesameblank
blackcardwithaquestionmark,butit’ssurroundedbytinyarrows.“Thatonemeansyoucanchoose
anyonetopullacard,oryoucanyourself,”JacobtellshimandArilooksatMerritt.
“Forreal,man?”
“Yeah,whynot?”
Merritt grabs the machine and takes the top card out. I look over at it as he reads it. “Take a
tequilabodyshotoffanyoneintheroom…exceptyourself.”Heholdshisbreath,andIdothesame,
knowing he’s gonna pick me. He won’t pick one of the other girls. He might pick Ari to be funny,
althoughIsureashellhopehedoesn’t.AsIwait,theanticipationhasmequestioningthings.
“Quinn?”heasksmeandeveryonecheers.Irollmyeyesattheirresponseandtakehishandas
heleadsmeintothekitchen.Onthecenterofthehugeislandissomuchliquoryou’dthinkwewere
hostingafratparty.
Myheartisbeatingprofusely,andmystomachisinmythroat.Iglanceatthegirls,andtheyget
up,followingusforabetterlook.“Oh,comeon,youguys,”Icomplainastheyallcrowdaroundus.
Merrittpourstheshot,thengrabsalimeandthesalt.Nowthathehaseverythingheneeds,heturns
andzonesinonme,hiseyescarnal,likehe’sabouttoeatmealive…ortearmypantsoffandfuck
me.
Iswallownervously,andhelooksatmythroat,gentlyplacingthelimebackwardsinmymouth
beforeIcansayanything.IguessIdon’thaveachoiceonwhereheplacesthesalt.Hiseyesscanmy
body,andIswearhecanhearmyheartpounding,it’ssoloud.Withnowarning,heleansintomyneck
andlicksitslowly.Ikeeplookingoff,nervousasshit;likenotmakingeyecontactwithhimisgoing
tomakemeanylessturnedonthanIalreadyam.
He’snotgivingmeroomtobreatheandgrabsthesalt,pouringitonmelikeapro.Onceit’s
added,hebraceshisweightoneithersideofmeonthecountertop,thensays,“Lookatme.”Ipullmy
eyesawayfromtheceilingandzoneinonhim.Helplessunderhiscontrol,withthelimekeepingme
silent,hesmirks,smashinghisbodyagainstmine,thebulgeofhiscockpressingintome,andIabout
gasp.Thenhislipsareonmeagainashesuckshard,pullingupontheskinofmyneck.Thegirls
squeal,andIwanttowhimper,itfeelssogood,butIresist.
He knocks back the shot, and I about drop the lime as he comes in on me, giving me a little
nudgebeforehislipsbrushupagainstmine.EveryonehollersandIblushashadeIhaven’tinalong
time.RedderthanIthinkKamididearlierrememberingherUNOgamewithJacob.
Mendon’ttypicallydothistome.No,wait,theyneverdo.I’malwaysincontrol;it’showIget
themtolikeme,butwithMerritt,thecontrolInormallyhaveisstrippedawayasheownsit,suddenly
makingmequestioneverything.
Chapter4
Merritt
Takingthelimewedgeoutofmymouth,IwhisperintoQuinn’sear,“Wouldyoustillkissoneofthe
girls,now?”Sheshakesherhead,andeveryoneshufflesbacktothelivingroom,nothearingwhatI
saidtoher.Istillhaveherpressedupagainstthecounterwithmybody,completelymotionless.The
sexualtensionbetweenusisheavy.I’mnotsurewhatitisabouther,butshemakesmewantherlike
I’veneverwantedawomanbefore.
Ididn’tlikehowshetoldmethatshe’dkissagirloverme.Andtomostguysitwouldprobably
beaturn-on,butnotme,notwhenIwantsomeone.Idon’tshare.
Oureyes still lockedon each other ’s,she knocks back aswig of thetequila straight from the
bottleandgrabsanotherlime,bitingintoit.Thejuicessquirt,landingonmycheek,andIchuckleat
heroutburst,backingoff,releasingher.Immediately,shedartsbacktothecouch,andIhavetogive
mycockamomenttogodown.Hertightassissohotjigglingbeneathhersweatpants.
Feelingsatisfied,Irefillmyglassandsitbackdownnexttohersowecancontinueourgame.
Asturnbyturngoeson,thecardskeepgettingworse.Thesepeoplewrotesomefuckedupshit
down.Oneofthecardssaystoremoveapieceofclothing,andasIlookatQuinn,withbothofher
feetbare,Ican’twait‘tilshepicksthatcardagain,‘causeshe’sgonnahavetotakeoffeitherherpants
orshirt.
“UNO,”Willowcallsout,thegameclosetocomingtoanend.ButnotbeforeQuinnlaysdown
a card that activates the wheel. As we all wait for it to stop, the six cards have been reshuffled and
addedbackin,soit’sanyone’sguesswhatwillbepicked.
It lands on her, and she rolls her eyes, reading the card out loud to us, “Do twenty jumping
jacks.”
Both Ari and Jacob had to do it earlier, and it was pretty funny to watch them. But there’ll be
nothingfunnyaboutwatchingQuinn’shotassdoit.Shegetsupalittlewobblyfromsomanydrinks
andbegins.Coolly,IdrinkmyScotch,tryingnottostareather,butit’shardwithhertitsalloverthe
place.
Issheevenwearingabra?
Asshejumpsandweallcountforher,she’sbacktolookinginthecorneroftheroom.Ilean
back in my seat, placing my hand on my thigh. Her eyes move to me, and I have to battle with my
cocktostaydown.Ican’ttellyouhowmanyhard-onsI’vegottentonight.
“Twenty!”Theroomerupts,andsheplopsdownsmellingevenbetterthanshehasallnight.
Asweworkbackaround,Willowendsthegame,cheeringasshelaysthefinalcarddownand
collectsherwinnings.Theguysalltosstheirhandsonthetable,pissedthattheylostandIcouldn’t
care less. Getting up, I decide to sneak away to check my email, hoping I’ve received the final
confirmationthattheCanadiandealisclosed.
Headingintothebathroom,soIdon’tgetcaught,Ihaven’tmissedanythingnew.Imean,other
thanthenormalbullshitthatalwaysgoesalongwiththesedeals.SoIrespondtoafewemailsfrom
earlier,andwhenIwalkbackintothebedroom,Quinnislyingonthecouch,herheadrestingonthe
armandhereyesareclosed.
WasIinthereforthatlong?
Lookingdownstairs,thehouseisdarkandquiet.
Everyonewenttobedalready?
Turning back, I feel bad for Quinn sleeping on the couch like that; she looks uncomfortable.
“Quinn?”Ishakeheralittle,andshegroggilylooksupme.
“Yeah?”sheasksme.
“Comeon,getinbed.”
Shenodsandsetsherglassesonthearmofthesofa.“Ididn’tknowwhichbedyouwanted,”she
saystome.
“I don’t think I’ll fit in either,” I tell her and pull the covers back for one, and she crawls in,
yawningsoadorably.Myeyesareonherlips,andasIcoverherup,she’salreadyout.
GrabbingmyiPad,IsitdownonthecouchsothankfulthatIbroughtitwithmeandseeanemail
fromAri.Thatmotherfucker!
To:MerrittSmith
From:AriAndersal
November02,201612:23am
Toldya,you’dgetthedeal.
Attached is an email from the landowners in Canada thanking Ari for his and his company’s
time,butsayingthattheyaretakingourbidonthedeal.Thenewsisfuckin’awesome.Typingupan
emailtoAri,Ithankhimforsendingmethemessage,thenquicklyemailmydadtosharethegood
newsthatwillmakehisnight.AfterIhit“send,”IrestmyheadbackandlookoveratQuinn.Myheart
startstopound,watchingher.Idon’tgetwhatitisabouther.Maybeit’sthefactthatshedoesn’tseem
to be into me. You know that saying, you want what you can’t have? And clearly, I can’t have her.
She’santi-menandall.
Leaving the room before she catches me watching her like a weirdo, I leave my iPad on the
couchandgoraidthefridgeforamidnightsnackandanotherdrink.Withafreshbeerinmyhand,I
eatacoldpieceofpizzaandgazeoutthewindowsatthevastsnowyview.
It’s gorgeous here compared to the heat of Texas that I’m used to. Finishing my beer, I
contemplateanother,butI’mspent,Ireallyam.I’vebeenupsincefivethismorningandneedtosleep,
soItrudgemyassbackupstairsandquietlyopenthedoor.QuinnisstilloutasIgrabsomethingto
changeinto.Goingintothebathroom,Iturntheshoweron.SteamquicklyfillstheroomasIbrush
myteethandlosethereflectionofmyselfinthemirror.
Strippingnaked,mycockishalfhard,likeit’sbeenallnight,andIgetintheshower,hoping
somehotwaterwillkeepitatbay.Itscaldsmyskin,andIletit.Ineedsomethingelsetofocuson,my
minddriftingbacktoearliertonight.TothewayQuinn’sskintastedbeneathmylipsandhowhertits
bouncedunderhert-shirt.
Runningmyhandsthroughmyhair,Ipopopenmyshampoo…thesmellofmintalwaysmakes
mefeelgood.Thenwashingmybodywithabarofsoap,Iadmitit’salostcause—thereisnotaming
my dick tonight; it’s not going to go down unless I get my cum out. Looking down at it standing
straight up, I grip the base, stroking it tightly. Holding it firmly in the palm of my hand, the tip
pulsates,andmyballstighten.
Sittingdownontheledgeintheshower,Irestmyweightbackonthecooltilewallandstroke
myself.AsIclosemyeyes,Quinn’sasscomesintomymind,andI’dlovenothingmorethantofuck
it,toseehernakedandhavemywaywithher.
Shemightactlikeshedoesn’twantme,‘causeshe’sbeenhurtandall,butifshe’dletme,I’d
haveherbeggingformore.AndthesecondthatIimagineheronherkneessuckingmeoff,Iletgo,
cumflyingintheairasmybodytensesandallthepentussexualtensionthatisinsideofmeflows
out.
Chapter5
Quinn
MymindisfuzzyasItakeinthebedroomandtrytounscrambletheeventsoflastnight.HowdidIget
in this bed? Heck, how did I get upstairs? Focusing on the clock to read the time, it hits me, and I
rememberhowsweetMerrittwaswhenheputmetobed.
Gettinguptousetherestroom,Ispotmyglassesonthearmofthecouch.AsIplacethemon
myface,IglancearoundandnoticeMerrittisn’tinhere.Icantellhesleptinhisbed,though,withthe
sheetsalltwistedupandpillowshalfoffthebed.
Opening the bathroom door half asleep, there he is, on his iPad as he brushes his teeth at the
sametime.“Morning,”Itellhim,andhewinksatme.Iclosethedoortothetinyroomwiththetoilet.
AfterI’mfinished,Iwalkout,andheasksme,“Didyousleepwell?”
“Yeah,reallyhard.You?”
“Notsogood.”
“I’msorry.”
“It’sokay.”
Splashing some water on my face, I notice he is glaring at his iPad like something is really
botheringhim,andIhavetoask,“What’sthematter?”
“Justworkshit.”
“See?That’swhyyouneedtostayoffthatthing.ForallIknow,myworkcould’veburnttothe
ground, but I’m not stressing about a thing.” He thinks about my comment like he is actually
consideringit,andIoutstretchmyhand,wonderingifhe’llreallygiveuphisiPad.
“CanIatleastcheckitonceaday?”heasks.
“No!” I shake my head and place my other hand on my hip, so he knows I’m dead serious.
“Okay,letmejustemailmyassistant.”
Ismile,lovingthatheisactuallygoingtounplug.Igetthatitmightsounddumb,butuntilyou
tryit,youdon’trealizethepowerelectronicshaveoveryou.
AsIwaitforhimtofinishhisemail,Ibrushmyteethandcombmyhair.I’mprettysureweare
skiingtoday,soI’mnotgonnabotherputtingonanymakeup.
Then I hear him hit send as I put my last contact lens in. I figure he’ll leave his iPad on the
counter,buthewalksoffwithit.
“What are you doing?” I stop him from leaving. My hand hits his rock hard chest, the
connectionbetweenusinstantlysostrong.Myinsidesignitethesamewaytheydidlastnightwhenhe
pinnedmeagainstthecountertopandtookabodyshotoffme.
Losingmyselfinhim,IforgetallabouthisiPadashetrailshisfingersupmyarmandcupsmy
neck.Myeyesclose,feelingthemomenttothefullest.I’mnotsurewhyI’mlettinghimtouchmelike
thiswhenIdon’tevenknowhim,butsomethinginsidemewantsto.
AsIopenmyeyes,he’sevenclosertome,hishotbreathonmine,andIfigurehe’llkissme.
Bracingmyweightonthecountertop,Iwait…
He slips around me and walks off with his iPad. Jesus, I wanna yell at him for leaving me
panting, but I don’t. My neck is still warm where his hand held it, and I touch it myself, feeling the
warmthbeneathmyfingertips.
Itwasasifhewasclaimingandpossessingme,inawayI’veneverexperienced,butIlikedit,
andI’mnotsurewhy,seeingasmenhavealwayshurtmeintheend.SowhywouldMerrittbeany
differentthantherest?
Aknockonthedoorstartlesme.“Comein.”
Willow is ready for the day; her long red hair pulled up, and makeup perfectly applied. “I
brought you coffee.” I take the cup from her, wrapping my hands around it. The warmth settles the
sexualtensionthatisriflinginsideofme.“Yousleepokay?”Ihearherwords,butmyneckcanstill
feelhisdamnfingersonme.“Quinn?”
“Yeah,I…I,uh,passedoutandsleptsuperhard.”
“NoissueswithMerritt?”
“Nope,”Irespondandtakeasipofmycoffee.
“Okay, well…I was just talking to Ted about the driving situation today, and with everyone’s
gear,we’regonnahavetotaketwocars.Areyouokaydriving?”
“Sure.”
“Awesome,thanks,babe.”Sheleavesthebathroom,andIdon’thavelonguntilwehavetoleave.
SoIhavetopullmyshittogether.
Digging through my suitcase, I pull out my thermals and ski pants. Getting dressed, I spot
Merritt’s bag on the floor and am tempted to look through it for his iPad. Walking up to it, I look
downandrightasIbenddown,Kamibargesintotheroomandscarestheshitoutofme.
“DoyouhaveahairtieIcanborrow?”
I pop up like I wasn’t doing anything wrong, and thankfully, she’s oblivious. “Yeah, in my
makeupbaginthebathroom.”
Sherushesinandjustasfast,chargesout,tyingherhairupontopofherhead.“Youready?”
“Ithinkso;Ineedfood.”
Aswewalkout,IlookdownatMerritt’sbagandwonderwhyitevenmatterstomeifhehashis
iPadornot.He’stheonethat’snotgettingthefullexperienceofthetrip,notme.
“Youwantsausageorbaconinyourbreakfastburrito?”Tedasksme,cookinginthekitchen.
“Neither.”
“She’savegetarian,”Willowremindshim.
“Really?Why?”Merrittaskslikeitoffendshim,chowingdownonaburritohimself,thetipsof
hishairstickingoutfrombeneathhisbeanie.
“Forafewreasons.”
“Whichare?”I’mnotsurewhythequestionpeevesmesobad,butitdoes.It’snoneofhisdamn
business.“Areyouavegetarianorvegan?”hepersists.
“What’sitmattertoyou?”
“I’mjustasking,what’syourproblemallofasudden?”
Everyone in the room looks at me, and I realize how ridiculous I’m being. Just because he’s
drivingmesexuallymaddoesn’tmeanthatIhavetobesuchabitchtohim.Twocanplayathisgame,
andthatiswhatIfullyintendtodo.
“Vegetarianandforhealthreasons.”
“That’scool.”
Tedpassesmemyburrito,andIpeekinside,justtobesurethereisnomeat.AsIbegintoeat,
wedecidethedrivingarrangementsfortheday.AriandMerrittwillbewithme,andKamiandJacob
willridewithTedandWillow.
Watching Merritt joke with the guys, I remind myself why I’m truly here—for a week of
relaxation, unplugged from the drama of my life and definitely no guys. Time and time again, I’ve
fallenintothesametrapthatalwaysleavesmeheartbrokenintheend,andIwon’tleadmyselfdown
thatroadagain…nomatterwhat.
Chapter6
Merritt
SittinginthebackseatofQuinn’sJeepasshedrivesustotheskiresort,Ariisonhisphone,whichI
havenocluewhyhewasabletokeepitwiththefitthatWillowthrewwhenshesawIhadmine.
Butthat’snotwhat’sreallyonmymind.It’sQuinn.Myeyesareonherintherearviewmirror
asshedrives,controllingthecareffortlesslyaswetrekupthesideofthemountain.Everysooften,
shekeepsglancingatme,makingmewonderifshewantsmejustasmuchasIwanther.
“Wouldyouturntheradioup?”
She smiles at my request as Ari gripes under his breath at his phone, emailing or messaging
onlyGodknowswho,andIhavetoadmit,eventhoughIdidn’tgivehermyiPad,beingunplugged
fromtheworldrightnowfeelsreallygood.
“YoulikeStateless?”sheasksme.
“Yeah,they’reoneofmyfavoritebands.”
“Metoo.”
“Youeverseenthemlive?”
“IreallywantedtowhentheycametoDenverandplayedatRedRocks,buttheticketssoldout
inminutes.”
“I’veseenthemafewtimes;they’reprettyincredible.”
“Really?”Hereyesbeam,andIlovetoseetheexcitementinherexpression.
Quietly,shesingsalongtothesong;hervoiceisbeautiful,andthenAriblurtsout,killingthe
moment,“Youknowwhat,man?Yourfatherisafuckingprick.”
“Ha,andyouthinkIdon’tknowthat?”
“Iswear,he’llthrowmoneyaway,justtomakemylifehard.”
MyfatherwaspissedwhenArimadethedecisiontoleavehiscompanyandjoinforceswithone
of the big timers in oil and gas. I couldn’t care less—I just wanted to see my friend happy, and
workingundermyfather,Ariwasn’t.“Whatdidhedo?”
“He got word of our bid on the Matrix land in North Dakota and offered the seller a million
dollarsmorethanuswhenhewasn’tevenpartofthebidding.”
“A million dollars?” Quinn chimes in, obviously she thinks she didn’t hear the amount
correctly.
“Yeah,amillion.”
“Youdon’tknowhisfather;he’sruthless,”Arisays,andIcouldn’tagreemore.Whenitcomes
to business, he doesn’t let anyone or anything get in his way. I don’t agree with half of the stuff he
does, but at the end of the day…he’s my boss, and if I want to inherit his company one day, then it
meansI’vegottaputupwithhisshit…allofit.
Ariisglaringoutthewindow,deepinthought,andIwishIcouldfixwhatmydaddid.
“I’mreallysorry,man.”
He nods, brushing me off as Quinn parks her SUV. We all get out of the car; my balls are
alreadyfreezing.Ari’sphoneringsandheanswersit,walkingawayfromusandtowardsthelodge.
“It’s gorgeous here,” Quinn says, taking in the view. The sun is peeking through the clouds,
tryingtowarmtheday,butit’snothelping.
“Itmightbepretty,butwhat’sit,like,tenbelow?”Icomplain.
“Don’tbesuchababy,”shetellsmeaswegetourgearoutofthebackofhervehicle.
“So,youskialot?”Iaskher.
“WhenI’mnotworkingItryto,you?”
“NotasoftenasI’dlike.Workseemstorunmylifethesedays,andwhenIgetamomentaway,I
endupcatchinguponsleep.”God,thatsoundslame,butitmustnotbebecausesheagreeswithme.
“Itotallygetwhatyou’resaying.Itookalongweekendlastmonthandhadalltheseplans,but
gotnothingdone.AllIdidwassleep.”
Jesus,notonlyisshehotashell,butherworkseemsjustasimportanttoherasmineistome.
Sheisaone-eightyfromthechicksI’mnormallyinterestedin—thefirstissueisalwaysthatIwork
toomuch.
“You guys ready to get smoked down the hill?” Ted asks with his head out the window as he
pullsupnexttous.
“You wish,” Quinn says, and the other guys gather their gear before we all walk inside the
mountainlodgetogetsuitedup.Thegirlsareinfrontofus,andIfindmyeyesonQuinn’sbody…
again.Evenbeneathherskioutfit,everycurveiscallingforme.“Youhitthatshitlastnight?”Jacob
asksme.
“Nah,shepassedout.”
Henodsandsays,“Yougonna?”
“Fuck,I’dliketo.”
“Didyoubringextrahandwarmers,baby?”Kamiaskshim,andIhopethegirlsdidn’thearus.
He passes them to her, then offers me a pair. Gladly, I accept, really wishing they made a pair you
couldtiearoundyourballsack.Afterweareallsuitedup,IspotAriatthebar.He’sstillonhisphone
andwavesustogoahead.
“He’llfindhisway,”Willowsays,notcaringthatweleavehim,andIkindafeelbadforleaving
him.
“Whatabouthisgear?”
“Ileftmycarunlocked,”Quinnsays.
Gettinginthelineforthechairlift,it’sapparentthatQuinnandIwillberidinguptogether.The
othercouplesarelostinconversation,andI’mnotsurewheretobegin.It’salongrideupandbeing
soclosetoherhasmymindonotherthings.
Wetakeaseat,ourthighstouchingaswemakeourinclineupthemountain.Quinnlooksoutat
the vast Rocky Mountains, taking in the view once again and I swallow, wishing I could find some
damnwordstosay.Thankfully,shemakesiteasyandpullsoutasmallflaskfromthepocketofher
lightbluecoat.Shetakesaswigthenpassesittomeandsays,“Letitallgo,Merritt.There’snothing
you can do about anything from up here.” She reads me well, and I knock back a drink, her words
resoundinginsideme.
IhatethatmyfatherhasupsetAri,andIwanttoundowhathe’sdone,butwithmydad,noone
tells him how to do things, and out of anyone, I know that best. The sting of the tequila warms my
throat,remindingmeofthebodyshotItookoffQuinnlastnight.
“Yougonnaletitgo?”sheasksme.
“I’mtrying.”
“Youdon’twanttobelikeAri,stressingoverworkwhenyoucouldbeenjoyingallofthis,do
you?”Sheopensherarmswide,makingmetakeinthesightsoftheskiresort.
“Idon’t,buthe’spissedatwhatmydaddid,andIfeelbad,likeI’mpartlytoblame.”
“Youdidn’tdoit,didyou?”Ishakemyhead,andshesays,“You’renotyourfather.Letitgo
andAriwilltoo.”
She’sright,Ineedto,andhewillaswell.
We each take another sip, the chair lift smoothly taking us up the mountain, and she asks me,
“So,areyougoingtogivemeyouriPadorwhat?”
“Noway!”
“Comeon.”Shebitesherbottomlip,andI’dlovetofeelhermoutharoundmycock.
“Let’ssayIdo.WhatdoIgetinreturn?”
“Nothing!”sheexclaims,likethinkingofrepayingmeisacruelpunishment.
“Comeon;IcanthinkofalotofthingsI’ddoinexchangeforhandingmyiPadovertoyou.”
“Okay,thennamesome.”
I’m still holding the flask and take another swig before giving it back to her. “I’d like to kiss
you,forstarters.”
“ButIwouldn’tkissyouback,”shesays,andIleanintoher,smellinghersweetness,knowing
shecan’tresistthesexualtension.She’dkissme,andsheknowsit,andrightasIgotoconnectour
lips, the chair lift reaches the top of the hill. “Welcome to the top,” someone says, and she panics,
tossingmetheflaskasshewrapsherhandsaroundherskipoles.IscrewthetoponitasIpositionmy
boardontheground.Shepushesherselfforward,andwegetofftheliftjustintime,makingourway
overtothegroup.Isticktheflaskintomypocket.“Youguysallcoolifwestartonthisblueslope?”
Tedaskseveryone,andIbucklemyleftfootintomyboard,stokedtoheaddown.Weallagree,and
Quinnasksme,“Youhavetheflask?”
“Yup, and you still owe me that kiss.” I take off, following everyone, leaving her behind.
Lookingbackather,she’srightbehindmeasshedigsherpolesintothethicksnowandpushesright
onpastme.“Fine…ifyoucancatchme.”Shebreezesonby,andIcuttheedgesofmyboard,working
togettractionasItryandcatchuptoher,butdamn,she’sfast.
“Shealwaysthatquick?”IhollerovertoWillow.
“No,shemustbeshowingoff.”
I smirk and make my way down to the bottom, loving the feeling of the alcohol coursing
throughmysystemandnotfocusingonanythingelsebutmynextmove.
IlosesightofQuinn,andonceIreachthebottom,Idon’tseeher.ThenIlooktomyleft,and
she’sinlineforthechairlift.Ithrowmyarmsupather,andshegetsonachair,ridinguptothetop…
alone.
“Man,shedoggedyou,”Tedsays,andIgetinlinewiththegroupridingupbymyself.Withthe
flaskinhand,Itakeadvantageandfinishit.
Thealcoholisfloodingmyveins,andIrealizehowitmakesmefeelwarmer.WhenIgetoff
thelift,Quinniswaitingforus.“Why’dyoudogme?”Iaskher,usingTed’sword.
“I told you to catch me, but I guess you were too slow. So now it’s your loss.” I laugh at her
remarkasshereachesintomypocketandtakestheflaskout.She’sgonnabepissedthatIdrankitall,
soIstrapupmyleftfootintomyboardandgetaheadstart,laughingasIhearhercomingafterme.
UpaheadIspotagroveoftreesandbankleft,turningintothem.Ihavetoslowmyspeed,and
whenIglanceback,Quinnisstillfollowingme.Oncemyboardcomestoacompletestop,Iunstrap
bothofmyfeetandlookather,desirerunningthroughmeasIsteptoher.
“You drank my entire flask?” she huffs, and I don’t answer her, just stalking towards her,
wrappingmyarmsaroundherbody,zoninginonthosesexyfuckin’lips.
She doesn’t protest or say another word; she just stands there all bundled up and naturally
beautiful.Theonlysoundsareherraggedbreathingandthetallpinetreesastheyswayinthewind
aboveus.
“I’mgonnakissyou,”Itellherandthenmylipsareonhers.Ourcoldnosesseemwarmagainst
thebitterchill,andIrelishinthefeeling.Herlipssofullandsoft,Ilovehowshetastes.Hertongue
strokesinsyncwithmine,andIdon’twanttostop.
Holdingherbodyclosetomine,shewhimpers,andmycockbeginstogrow—
even in the frigid winter temperature, she can still turn me on. God, she tastes so amazing. I
wantmorewithQuinn.Ineedtohavemore.Iwillhavemore.I’llhaveeverysinglebitofherifit’s
thelastthingIdo.
Chapter7
Quinn
Walkingbackintothelodgeafteradayfullofskiing,mylegsaresosoreandtired.Idon’tfeellikeI
cantakeanotherstep,andasIsitdown,reliefheatsmylimbsinthemostdeliciousway.
“Hey,didyouseeAriatalltoday?”Willowasksme.
“No,Ithoughthewasjustinheredrinking.”
IglanceoveratMerrittwhoisbullshittingwithTedandJacob,thethreeofthemobliviousto
Ari’s absence. “Do you guys know where Ari is?” Willow asks them, and they all three give her a
blankexpressionandshaketheirheads.
Shewalksawayfromusandovertothebar,askingthebartenderaquestion.“Whatdidhesay?”
Iaskherasshecomesbacktous.
“Hedoesn’tknowshit.”
“Shouldwegobacktothehouse?”Ioffer.
“Ithinkso;it’snotlikehimtojustdisappear.Youknowhelovesskiing.”
Loading up in my car, Merritt sits in the front seat. Since our kiss in the trees, nothing has
changed,andIlikethat.“Wheredoyouthinkheis?”Iaskhim
“Youwannaknowmyhonestopinion?”
“OfcourseIdo.”
“He’sprobablybangingsomechickhemettoday.”
“Really?Youthinkso?”
“I do. I bet he met her at the bar and after getting pissed about work…” he trails off and I
couldn’timagineAridoingthat.He’ssuchaniceguyonthesetrips.“Youlookshocked.”
“Iam.”
“Why?Weallfuck.”
“Iknow,IjustthinkofArilikeabrother,soIcan’timaginehimdoingthat.”
“Well,youdon’tknowtheguyIdo.”
“Isthatthewayyouare?”Iaskhim,wonderingifhe’sonlycomingontomesowecanfuck.
“No way,” he’s quick to answer like he’s the total opposite. With my hands wrapped tightly
aroundthesteeringwheel,Iputmycarinparkbackatthehouse,andIcan’thelpbutwonderifhe’s
lying.“What,youdon’tbelieveme?”heasks,sensingmydoubt.
“Not really.” And I’m not sure if it’s that I don’t believe him, or I’m just trying to push him
away.Menhavemesotwisteduplately,Idon’tknowwhattobelieveanymore.
“Whatever,Quinn,youdon’tknowme.”Hegetsoutofmycar,pissed,andIfollowbehindhim,
headinginsideandstraightfortheliquor,needingafuckin’drink.
“Ari?” Willow calls out, and before he can answer her, Ari is in Merritt’s face, shoving him
backwards.“DidyoureallythinkIwouldn’tfindout?”
“Whatthefuckareyoutalkingabout,man?”hechallengesback,lookingdownathim.
“Mystocks,man.Youfuckedme.”Arishoveshimagain.
“Ididn’tdoshit,man!”
“Fuckyou!”
“Youdon’tknowthewholestory.”AndthistimeMerrittpusheshimback,obviouslyagitated,
sohardArifallstohisass.Hefliestohisfeetandswings,catchingMerrittwithahardrighthookin
the face. The sound of Ari’s fist against Merritt’s skin echoes in the room, and I close my eyes
clenchingthebottleoftequila.Thenoisesomehowpiercesfrommyguttomyhead.
IopenmyeyesandthankfullyTedandJacobhavejumpedinandarepullingtheguysapart.
“That’senough,”Willowshouts,andMerritthashishandoverhisface,bloodstreamingdown
hisarmashewalksawayfromallofusandtowardsourroom.Runningafterhimtomakesurehe’s
okay, I realize I’m still holding a bottle of liquor as I enter looking for him
.
I find Merritt in the
bathroom,leaningonthecounterwithatowelpressedtohisfacewhereAri’sfisthithim,andIpass
himthebottle.
“Youokay?”Iaskandhenods.“What’shetalkingabout?”
Hetakesaswigandlooksrightatme.“Afterheleft,he’sbeenwaitingforthemoneyfromthe
stockhehadinthecompany.Myfatherhasbeenstallingonsigningoffonthem,dickinghimaround
andshit.SoIhadthemtransferredintomynameandwasgoingtopayhimwhattheywereworth.I
hateseeinghimgetscrewedoverbymydad,youknow?”
“Andnowhethinksyouboughtthembehindhisback?”
“Yeah, and what pisses me off the most is that he’d even think I’d do something malicious to
him.He’smybestfriend.”
“Thentalktohim.”
“No,fuckhim,heswungfirst.”
Obviously,Merrittislettinghisfeelingsgetthebestofhim,soIfigureIcan’tpushhim.“How
didheevenfindout?”Iask.
“Probablymydad.He’sbeentryingtodriveawedgebetweenussinceheleftthecompany.”
“Whywouldyourdaddothat?”
“Youdon’tknowmyfather.Heneedstocontroleverything;hewaspissedatmewhenhefound
outIboughtthem.”
Merritttakesanotherswig,andIplacemyhandoverhis,wantingtolookathisface.Holding
ontothetowel,heletsgo,butlooksdownatmeandeveninthiscrazyassmoment,itseemsI’mall
thatmatters.
Gently,Iliftthetowel,buthisfaceisstillbleeding,splitwideopen.“How’sitlook?”
“Not too bad,” I lie and press the towel back against his face. As I hold a little pressure, he
winces.Staringintomyeyes,hereachesupandrunshisthumbovermybottomlip.Myinsidesheat
fromthetouch,theeffecthehasovermeisunreal.I’mnotsurewhattodo.Mymindistellingmeone
thing,butmyheart,mypoordamagedheart,istellingmeanother.
However, before I can battle with the decision any longer, we are interrupted by Kami as she
brings in ice and a first aid kit. “How’s it look?” she asks, and I stupidly respond, still in a daze,
“Good.”
Ipullthetowelaway.Thebleedinghasslowed,andMerrittlooksinthemirrorathisface.“You
thinkthislooksgood?”hecomplains.
“Imeantitlooksbetter.”Iopenthefirstaidkitandfindafewbutterfliestoplaceoverthecut.“It
mightneedstitches,”Kamiadds,andhebrushesheroff,takinganotherswigofliquor.I’mtemptedto
takethebottlefromhim,he’sbeendrinkingallday,andnowwiththis,hemightendupfightingwith
Ariagain.
“Or not…let me know if you guys need anything else. We’re ordering pizza for dinner. Any
requests?”
“Aveggieone,please.”
“Merritt?”
“Nah,I’llprobablybeleavingsoon.”
Kamileaves,andMerrittisgivingmethatlookagain,makingmyheartraceamillionmilesa
minute.“Leaving,why?”
“Idon’tknowanyonehere,andI’mnotabouttodealwithAriandhisshitwhenIwasjusttrying
tohelp.”
“But,youknowme.”
“Thatdoesn’thelprightnow.Ishouldn’thavecome.Ihaveatonofworktodo.”
“Merritt,Igetthatyouwanttogo,butAriisyourbestfriend,right?”
“Yeah.”
“Then talk to him before you leave. Trust me—you don’t want to run from your problems.”
Hearing the words myself makes me feel like that is what I’m doing, pushing aside the pain of my
breakup this week. But maybe that is what I need to be doing, in order to get past what I’ve been
through.I’vegottaletitgo,thesamewayMerrittneedstoletthedramawithArigotoo.
HestudiesmeasIlookatthecutonhisface.“Areyousureyoudon’twanttohaveadoctor
lookatthis?”Iaskhim.
“Yeah,it’llbefine.”
“Okay. But, before you make your mind up and leave, I want you to know, I’m sorry about
accusing you of not being a good guy,” I tell him, feeling bad for insinuating such a thing earlier.
Clearyheisaniceguy—lookwhathedidforAri.
“It’sallgood.Youjustwentthroughabreakup,soyourheartisguarded,Igetthat.”
“Thankyou.”
“Ofcourse.SoIguessI’llgoandseeifIcanhashthisshitoutwithAri.”
“Yeah?Youwantmetocome?”
“No,Mom,we’llbegood,Ipromise.”
“Mom?”Irespondbacktohim,mymouthgapingopen.
Hewinksandkissesmycheek—hislipsonmeagainareasurprisebuthavemewantingmore.I
don’tknowwhatitisabouthimthatmakesmyinsidesaflusteredmess.I’veneverhadamanmake
mefeellikethis,ever.
Chapter8
Merritt
“Sowegood,man?”IaskAriafterIexplaineverythingandwefinallygettothebottomoftheshit
mydadtriedtopull.
“Yeah,sorryIjumpedtoconclusions.”
“It’sallright.YouknowI’malwaysgonnalookoutforyou.”
“AndIappreciatethat.”
“Ofcourse,brother.”
“Youknowyouroldmanisfuckedup,though,right?”
“Youdon’thavetotellme.Idealwithitonthedailyandonlybecausesoonthecompanywillbe
mine.”
“Damnstraightitwill.”
We exchange a hand slap and then go downstairs. The group is all seated around the dining
roomtable,andQuinnsmileswhensheseesustogether.Thedoorbellrings,andAriandIgrabthe
abundanceofpizzasthatwereordered.“Jesus,howmanypizzasdidyouthinkweneeded?”Ariasks
Willow.
“What?”shereplies,actinglikeit’snobigdeal.
Aswesetthepizzadowninthekitchen,Quinncomesovertousandsays,“So,areyouguys
good?”
“Ofcourse,thanksforpushingmetotalktohim,”Itellher.
“Anytime.”
“So in order to keep the peace going, I’m declaring tonight pizza and water night,” Willow
announces.
“What?”Theroomeruptsinchaosathercrazyassremark.ButI’velearnedthatwhenitcomes
toWillow,she’sabitcontrolling,andyoujustdon’targue.
“I’m serious, Ari, you had way too much to drink today, and the rest of you were hitting the
flasksallday.”
“Comeon,Willow,”Kamipleads.
“Nope!It’sgonnabeanearlynight.Wehaveicefishinginthemorning,andafterskiingallday,
wecoulduseachillnightandsomerest.”
Ariwalksovertothefridgeandgrabsabeer,twistingthetopoffanddroppingthecaptothe
floor.Willowisstunnedasheslamshalfthebeerandsays.“Howaboutpizzaandbeernight,nothing
hard?”Sherollshereyesaseveryonecheerslikeabunchofkidswhojustgottheirwaywiththeir
parents.IglanceatQuinn,andshesmilesbackatme,bothofusknowingourbottleoftequilaisstill
inourbathroom.
IgrababeerfromthefridgethentakeoneoutforQuinntoo.AsIpassittoher,shesmiles,the
mostadorableexpressiononherface.“Didtheygetyourveggieoneright?”
“Uhhuh,it’skindahardtomessup,though.”
“Iwouldn’tknow;Idon’teatveggieanything.”
Iopenoneoftheboxesandpulloutapieceofpepperoni.AsIeatit,Quinnsaystome,“What
doyousaywegotakeafewshots?”
Iwipemyhandsclean,lovingtheidea.Therestoftheroomisengulfedinconversationmaking
iteasyforustoslipaway.Ilockthebathroomdoor,sowearen’tinterruptedagain,andQuinnhops
uponthecountertop.“So,isWillowalwayssocontrolling?”Iaskherassheunscrewsthebottle.
“Yup,butshe’salwaysbeenthatway,andwe’vealllearnedtoacceptherbecauseshereallydoes
havethebestintentions.”Sheknocksbackaswigthenpassesmethebottle.
“Itcanbeannoyingthough.”
Shenodsandtheroomisfilledwithanawkwardsilence,andI’mnotsurewhattodo.Itakea
second drink, the alcohol burns, but I love it, and then give her the bottle again. “So ice fishing
tomorrow,youeverbeen?”Iaskher,things…stillawkward,andshegrins.
“Everyyear,you?”
“WhenIwasyounger.Iusedtofishallthetime,butnevericefishing.Nowwithwork,Idon’t
domuchofanythingelse.”
“So…ifyourworkissocrazy,howcomeyoucameonthistrip?”
“Ari has asked me for the last three years straight, and I turned him down. This time, I was
gonnadothesame,butthetruthis,Ineededthebreak.MydadandIareateachother ’sthroats.”
“Whydoyouworkwithhim?Hesoundsreallyterrible.”
“Oh,heis.Hehasthatdumboldschoolmentalityandthinkseveryonehastodowhathesays
‘cause he’s ‘the boss.’ My opinion doesn’t always matter; it’s just about closing deals and making
money.”
“Can’tyougoelsewhere?”
“Icould,buthe’ssettoretiresoon,andthenthecompanyismine.I’veworkedsohard,andit’s
rightatmyfingertips.”
“Wow,that’llbeawesome.”
“Itwillbe.Iturneddownafull-ridebasketballscholarshiptoDuke,soIcouldworkformydad.
SoI’vegottamakesurethispaysoff.”
“Youplaybasketball?”
“I did. I always wanted to join the NBA, but it was such a gamble and working for my father
wasn’t.Itwasasurething,thesafething,youknow?Enoughaboutme,whataboutyou?”
“Oh,there’snotmuchtome,”shegetsshy,andI’mnotsurewhy.
Isnatchthebottlebackfromher,andshelaughsatme.
“Don’tbestupid.Itoldyou,nowyoutellme,”Inudge.
“Umm,let’ssee,IgraduatedfromCUBoulderinColoradowithaMaster ’sdegreeinfinance
andgothiredatthefirstfirmIappliedto.Thatwasthreeyearsago.Now,I’maninvestmentadvisor
withthem.IwasrecentlypromotedaftersigningthebiggestclienttheyhadintheDenverofficethis
year.”
“Noshit,that’sfuckingawesome.”
“Yup!Notmyproudestmoment,though,consideringtheclientwasmyex.Butthejobissweet,
andeventhoughthingswithhimendedbadly,asleastIgotsomethingoutofthedeal.”
“That’skindafunny.”
“No,it’snot!”Sheglaresatmeandsnatchesbackthebottle,hersexyblueeyesglimmeringin
thebrightlightofthebathroom.
“Whatelse?”
“Whatdoyouwanttoknow?”
“Youhavesiblings?”Iaskher.
“No,you?”
“No.Whataboutyourparents?”Iask.
“TheyliveinDenverinthehouseIgrewupin.Igotodinnerattheirhouseonceaweek.”
“Lucky!IwishIhadthat.ThelastmealIatewithbothmyparentswaswhenIwasakid.”I’mnot
evensurewhyItoldherthat.Itmakesmesoundlikeabitch,butallthealcoholhasmespinning.
“I’msorry.”
“Not a big deal, my dad was always busy working, so he was gone, now I’ve joined him.”
Steppingtoher,standingbetweenherdanglinglegs,Ileanin,noteventhinkingasIbracemyweight
onthecountertopandblurtout,“Iwanttokissyouagain.”
“Quinn?”Willowcallsoutbeforeshecananswer,knockingonthebathroomdoor.
Hangingmyheaddown,themoment—yetagain—ruined.Ilookintohereyesandsheresponds,
“I’llberightout.”
“Areyouokay?”
“Yup.”
“HaveyouseenMerritt?”
ShelooksatmewithwideeyesandIhollerouttoher.“I’mhere;Quinnwasjustcheckingmy
face.”
WillowrattlesthedoorknobandIhidethebottleunderthesink,thenunlockthedoorandask
WillowasIopenit,“Doyouthinkweshouldreplacethebutterfliesyet?”Thequestiondistractsher.
ShestudiesthecutonmyfaceasIstandreallyclosetoherandthenshesays,“No,itlooksgood.”
“Cool,thanksforcleaningit.”IwalkoffleavingthegirlslikenothingwasgoingonwithQuinn
andwinkather,lookingbackatherstillsittingonthecounter,intheexactspotwhereIlefther.My
cockwantsherandispissedatmeforleavingher.Butbeforethenightisover…I’llhaveher.
Chapter9
Quinn
“Whatwereyouguysreallydoinguphere?”Willowasksme.
“Nothing,”Ilieandknowitdoesn’tsuitmeasallthebloodrushestomycheeks.
“Don’tlietome.”
“I’mnot,wewerejusttalking.”
“Inthebathroom?”
“What’sthatmatter?”
“Seemsalittlestrange.”
“Icametotakemycontactsout,andheaskedmetolookathischeek,thenwegottotalking.”
Istarttotakemycontactsout,myreflectionblurringfromsomuchliquorandshesaystome,
“Youlikehim,don’tyou?”
“Idon’tlikehim;Idon’tevenknowhim.”
“Listen,you’reabiggirlandcandowhateveryouwant,butArihastoldmestoriesaboutshit
theygetupto,soI’dwatchyourself.”
“Stories?”Iquestionher.
“Yeah,someshadyshitwentdowninVegaswiththemonetime,likeHangoverstyle.”
I laugh out loud at Willow, sliding my glasses on my face, and turn around. “Do you not
remembercollege?Yousleptwithhalfofthefootballteam,andnowyou’regivingmeadvice?”
“Youbitch!Thatwasforeverago.Youweren’tinnocentyourself,MissCocksucker.”
“No,Iwasn’t,nooneis.Plus,nothingwithMerritthashappenedorwillhappen.He’sasweet
guy,endofstory.”
My best friend hugs me, always trying to look out for me. “Shall we share a beer, Mrs.
Controlling?”
“Don’tcallmethat.”
“Okay,howabout,‘Mrs.WaterAndPizzaNight’?”
Shehitsmyarm,andweheaddownstairs.Everyoneisputtingontheircoatsandboots,andI’m
notsurewhy.“Whereyouguysgoing?”Iask.
“Firepit,”Kamitellsme.Tedisalreadyoutside,lightingalltheheatersthatlinethedeck.The
gas fire in the center is blazing, and I grab my coat, sliding my boots on at the same time. We all
flood outside and Merritt hands me a cup. “Here’s a fresh beer for ya.” I look in at the liquid and
knowrightawaythatit’snotbeer.
“Thanks.”
Theairiscoldasitwhipsaroundus.Itakeaseatononeofthebenchesthatsurroundthepitand
siponthestrongassdrinkI’mholding.“It’snotthatbadouthere,”Willowsays.
“Didyoubrings’morestuff?”Kamiasks.
“Dammit,IknewIwasforgettingsomething.”
“Damn,Mrs.Perfectforgotsomething,”Ariteasesher.
WillowglaresathimandIsuggest,“WecouldplayTruthorDare?”
“Noway,”Tedsays,“Lasttimethathappened,Ifrozemyballsoff.”
“Whathappened?”Merrittaskshim.
“Ihadtodoanakedsnowangel.”
“Ohshit.”
“Yeah,notfun.”
“I’llplay,ifeveryonethrowsinahundred,”Arisays.
“Whydoesitalwayshavetobeaboutmoney?”Willowaskshim.
“Uh,becauseitmakesitsomuchmorefun.”
“I’mdown,”Merrittaddsandthentherestofthegroupagrees.
“Sweet,that’saseven-hundred-dollarpot,”Jacobexclaims.
“Whataretherules?”Willowasks.Ofcoursesheneedstoknowtherules.
“Rules?Wedon’tneedrules,sis.Ifyouwon’tdoadare,thenyou’reout,lastpersongetsthe
money.”
“Whoa,”Tedchimesin,“Whatifwedon’tagreewithsomething?”
“Then don’t do it, Ted,” Ari says to him like he’s a moron, and Merritt and I calmly sit back
sippingonourdrinks.“Quinn,whydon’tyoustart?Itwasyouridea.”
“Okay.”IwrackmybraintothinkofaquestionanddecidetoaskMerritt.
“TruthorDare?”
“Truth.”
“Oh,comeon,man,”Arigripes,andIignorehim,continuingonwithmyquestion.
“Haveyoueverhadathreesome?”
Hesmilesandresponds,“No.”
Theplaymovestomyright,andforsomereason,Ibelievehim.ThenMerrittasksme,“Truth
orDare?”
“Truth.”
“Doyouspitorswallow?”
“Swallow,”Itellhimandtakeabiggulpofliquid.Swallowingit,thesexualtensionbetweenus
isoffthecharts.
Ariisnextandasksme,“TruthorDare?”Irollmyeyes,andhesays,“What?Youwantedto
playthisgame.
“Fine,Truth.”
“Doyoulikeitroughorslow?”
“Ari!”Ishoutathim,andhewaitsformetoanswer.
“Comeon,sevenhundreddollarsisontheline,”hechallengesmetoanswer.
“Fine…slow.”
Merrittiswatchingme,thesamewayhedidthefirsttimehewalkedinonmeshirtless,eating
meup,andIcrossmylegstostopmyclitfromtwitching.
Willowisnextandsays,“Quinn,TruthorDare?”
“Whatthefuck,youguys?”
“Youwantedtoplay,”sheremindsme,andIblurtout,“Dare.”
“Oh…Ididn’texpectyoutosaythat.”Wealllaughatherdumbremark.“I’vegotagoodone.
Givealapdancetoanyoneforaminute.”
“Oh…that’s so original,” I tell her, and she sticks her tongue out to me. I sense Merritt lean
back, thinking he’s got this in the bag, and I get up bending down in his ear as I bravely whisper,
“Maybelater.”ThenwalkoffandstraddleWillow.SheisshockedasIholdontoherneckandbegin
ridingherbody.Everyonecheersmeon,andshejustcoversherface,completelyembarrassed.
Aftermyminuteisup,Itellher,“Maybeyoushouldn’tpickonme.”
TedgivesmeabreakandasksWillow,whoisstillbeetred,“TruthorDare?”
“Truth,”she’squicktoanswer.
“What’syourfavoritetypeofporn?”
“Ted,”shescoldshim,andIfinditfunnyhowabunchofadultsturnwhatisusuallyaninnocent
child’sgameintosomethingsoinappropriate.
“Anal,”shewhispers,andweallbustoutlaughing.WhoknewourinnocentcontrollingWillow
wasintoanal?
NextisJacobandheasksArithequestion.“Dare,”heresponds.
“Givemeablowjob.”
“Baby!”Kamiscoldshim
“Whatthefuck?Noway,man.”
“Guessyou’reout!Remembertherules?”
“Fuckyou!”Heflipshimoff,andKamiasksme,“TruthorDare?”
I roll my eyes, finishing my cup of liquor. “Truth,” I respond scared that she will pull what
Jacobdid.
“Doessizematter?”
“Hell yeah, it does,” I blurt out, and everyone is quiet. I maybe could’ve answered that one a
littledifferently.
It’s my turn, and for some reason, the money isn’t coming into play at all. I just want to ask
Merritt.“TruthorDare?”
“Truth,”heresponds,andI’msurprised.
“Whatisyourbestsexualexperience?”Helickshislipsandthenasksme,“Youwantmetobe
honest?”
“Ofcourse.”
“Idon’tthinkI’vehadityet.”
Hiswordsandthatfuckingsmirkignitesomethinginsideme.He’sspeakingtome;Icanfeelit.
AndI’mnotevensurewhy.WhyamIintriguingtohim?He’ssexyandsuccessfulandcanhavehis
pickofwomen,buthewantsme,andasmuchasIdon’twanttoadmitit,Iwanthimto.
Chapter10
Merritt
“Shhh,”ItellQuinnassheeatsapieceofcoldcheesepizzainthekitchen.It’swayaftermidnight.The
restofthehouseisasleep,butwearestillup,drunkoffourassesandhavingfun.“You’regoingto
wakeupMrs.Controlling.”
Shelaughsloudly,notcaringwhohearsher.Wehavetobeupforfishinginacoupleofhours,
andIdon’twanttogotobed.
Lookingdownatherandhersexybody,hertitsarepoppingthroughhershirt,andIcan’thelp
myself.Leaningin,Ikissher,tastinghersweetnessagain.Shemeltsinmyarms,moaningagainstmy
tongue as she wraps herself around me. Taking my fingers, I knot them into the back of her hair,
holdingandcontrollingher.Mycockisrockhard,andtomysurprise,shereachesdownandgrabsit,
clenchingitthroughmypants.Ipressmyselfagainsther,thealcoholurgingmeon.Iwanther.
Fuck…Ineedher.
Shetiltsherheadbackandlooksintomyeyes,tellingmeshewantsmetoo,soIlifthert-shirt,
exposingherperkytits.“Iwannafuckyousobad,”IwhispersoftlyintoherearasIsqueezebothof
herhardnipplesinbetweenmyfingertips.Movingherhandinsidemypants,shegripsmyshaftand
says,“Thendoit.”
“Righthere?”Iquestionher,lookingaroundthekitchen.
“Mmhmm.”Reachingover,Iturnthelightoff,hopingifanyonewakesandcomesdownhere,
theywon’tseeus.Ipullmypantsdownasshetakeshersoff.“Areyouonthepill?”Iaskquietly,and
shenodsspreadingherpussylipsopenforme,tellingmethatshedoesn’twanttouseprotectionas
muchasIdon’t.
Hercuntisgorgeous,shavedsobeautifully,andbeforeIcandoanythingelseormoveherto
thecouchorourroom,shepullsmetowardsher,hertight,wetslitslidingaroundmeasIsinkinside
her. “Shit,” she moans, and I nestle myself all the way into her, my arms wrapped around her. She
gripsmydickfirmly,andasmuchasIwanttopoundtheshitoutofher,Irememberhersayingshe
likesitslow.GentlyIpullback,hercuntholdingontotheskinofmyshaft.Shebracesherweighton
thecountertopandwithmyfreehand,Ipushhershirtup,holdingontooneofhertitsasImovemy
cock,pleasingusboth.
“Fuck,”Imurmurandglancedown,lovinghowIlookmovinginandoutofher.Myhardshaft
isbulgingashersweetpussyswallowsmewhole.
Shemoveswithme,andIalreadywanttocome.Reachingdown,Irubherclit,wantingtopush
hertheretoo,andherfacetwistsasshewhimpers.
“Uhhuh,likethat.”
“Areyougonnacomeonmycock?”Imurmur.
Shecriesoutloudly,mywordsturningheronandIcoverhermouthtoquiethernoisesascum
suddenlyexplodesfrommyballs,shootingdeepinsideher.Heatradiatesfrommyheadtomytoes,
thefeelingoflettinggosointense.AsIfuckherandholdherinplace,shebeginstowrithe,giving
overtothepleasure.
Onceourbodiessettle,Idon’twanttostop,andshelooksatmeasIcontinuetomove,witha
smirkonhersexyfaceandasks,“Jesus,didthatreallyjusthappen?”
I nod, still hard, and pull my cock from inside her, we both look down at it covered in her
wetness,andIaskher,“Wannadoitagain?”
***
ReachingnexttomeforQuinn,she’snotthere.Ilikedcuddlingallnightandfuckingheronce
more.Openingmyeyes,Ilookattheotherbedandthenrollover,takingintheroom.
Somethingmovesonthefloorandcatchesmyeye.IlaughatQuinnwhoissleepinginthemost
uncomfortableposition.Pinchinghernipplethroughhershirt,shelooksupatmewithahugegrin.
“Howyoufeelingdownthere?”
“Didyoureallyletmesleeponthefloor?”Hervoiceisraspy,andIchucklealittle.
“Ihavenocluehowyougotdownthere.”Shesitsupandstretches,hertitsstrainingthefabric
ofhershirt.“Don’tdothat.”
“What?”
“That!”Ipointtoherhardtits,andshelaughs,gettingoffthefloor.Ipatthebednexttome,and
sheclimbsbackin,ourbodiesimmediatelyclosetogether.“CanIfuckyouagain?”
“Whatareweevendoing,Merritt?”
“Whatdoyoumean?”
“Wewentfromstrangerstoovernightloversand…I’mnotlookingforarelationship,Ijustgot
outofafuckedupone.”
“Well,I’mnotlookingforarelationshipeither,butIcan’tdenythatIlikeyourpussy…alot.”
Shelooksintomyeyes.“Sojustsex,that’sallyouwant?”
“Sure.”
“Whataboutnextyear ’strip?”
“I’msureI’llbebusywithwork.Afterthisweek,you’llneverseemeagain.Let’shavefun.We
obviouslyhaveanattractiontooneanother,andthenwecangoourseparateways.”
Sheswallowslikethedecisionishardtomake.Mycockisthrobbingforherlikeithasbeen
since I laid eyes on her perfect body. I push it against her ass and kiss the top of her shoulder. She
exhales,likingtheattention.ThenIslidemyhanddownthesideofherbodyandputmyhandinside
herpants.
“Justthisweek?”sheasks.
“Uhhuh.”IrollherontoherbackandbeginatrailofkissesalongherjawasIfingerher,slow
andgentle,likeshelikes.I’veneverbeenwithawomanwholikesitslow.Theyalwayswantmore,
harder,faster,butnotQuinn,andIthinkIcangetusedtoit.Thesmallest,slowestmovementspush
herovertheedge.
There’saknockonthedoorandwebothfreeze.“Quinn,Merritt?Youguysup?”Willowcalls
out.
“Yup, we’re up.” She answers for the both of us, and I add a second finger inside of her,
strokingherpussyasIlookather.Shehashereyesclosed,lyinginmyarms,undermycontrol.
Her breathing is fast as I finger her, adding a third finger, and she turns her face towards my
chest,quietingherselfbywhiningintome.“Comeforme,”Iorderher,movingmyhandfaster,and
boydoesshe.Herbodyshakesassheletsgo,grippingmyfingers,makingmydickwanttoexplode
asshebegsmeformore.
Asshesettles,Ithinkshemightwantithardandfast.ThesecondIpickedupspeed,sheletgo.
“CanIsuckyouoff?”
Inodandslipmypantsdown.Shebrushesherhairovertooneshoulderasshegripsmyshaft
andthenswallowsmewhole.Hermouth,sowarmandtight.Iurgemyhipstowardsher,meetingher
movements,andbegintofuckhermouth.
“Youwantmycum,don’tyou?”Iaskherquietly,andshenods,moaningagain,eatingallofme
up.
Myballstightenwatchingherstretchedlips—theyaresofuckinghot—andaswegazeintoeach
other ’seyes,Ican’tfightit,orstopwhatsheisdoingtome.Lettinggo,Ibarrelmyselfdeepintoher
throatasmycumdrenchesher.
Iholdontoherhair,groaningharshly,givinghermouthafewlastpumps.Shelicksmedrybut
seemstowanttokeepgoing,andthetruthis,Idon’twanttostop.Icouldgoatitalldaywithher.I’m
notsurewhatitis,butbeingwithheriseasyandfuckinggood,reallygood.
“Youbettertrytobequieternexttime,”shetellsme.
“Notachancethat’llhappenwiththatmouthofyours.”
Sheliftsmyshirtandbeginstokissmylowerstomach.“I’mgonnahavetofuckyou,Quinn,”I
warnher,butshedoesn’tstop.
“Did you bring—” Willow barges in and I cover myself up as she freezes when she sees us
togetherlikeweare.Quinnshootsupwardsandoutofbed.
IsitupandlookatWillowwhoisstandinginthedoorwayshocked.“I’msorry,guys.”
“It’sokay,”IsayandwonderwhyQuinnflewoutofbed.You’dthinkhermomwalkedinonus
orsomething.“I’mgonnashower,”Itellthemandadjustmycockunderthecovers,beforeleaving
themsotheycanhaveamomenttogether.I’msureWillowhasaboutamillionquestions,andI’mnot
downtobetherewhensheasksthemall.
Chapter11
Quinn
Merrittclosesthebathroomdoor,andWillowlooksbackatmewithwideeyes,likeamomwhojust
caughttheirkidinbedwiththeirteenageboyfriend.
“What’sgoingon?”
“Notmuch.”
“Quinn,don’tlietome.I’myourbestfriend.”
“Wewerejusttalking,andyoustartledme.”
Shecrossesherarms.Mybestfriendknowsmesomuchbetterthanthat.“Didyouguyshook
up?”
“Maybe,andsowhatifwedid?”
“Quinn,” she sighs and sits down on the bed. She pats it for me to join her and I’m sure I’m
abouttogetthemomlecture.“DoyoureallythinkhookingupwithMerrittisagoodidea,afterwhat
you’vejustbeenthrough?”
“Whatdoesmypasthavetodowithanyofthis?”
“Idon’twanttoseeyouenduphurtagainisallI’mworriedabout.”
“That’snotgoingtohappen,don’tworry.”
“Howdoyouknow?”
“Merritt and I agreed that whatever happens here, stays here. Plus, we’ll never see each other
afterthis.”
“Untilnextyear ’strip.”
“He’snotcoming.”
“Youreallythoughtthisallout,didn’tyou?”
“Yes,Idid,”ItellherbecauseIdon’twanttoenduphurtagaineither.Myheartisguarded,and
I’mgoingtokeepitthatway.
“Sowashegood?”
“Oh…nowyouwanttoknow.”
Shebumpsmewithhershoulderandnods.“Reallygoodandbig.Icouldn’tdenytheattraction
betweenusanymore.”Itryandkeepmyvoicedown,sohedoesn’thearus.
She holds her hands a distance apart, trying to gauge his size, and I look at them mouthing
“bigger”toher,andoutwalksMerrittwithatowelaroundhiswaist,alreadyfreshfromtheshower.
Myeyeseathimup,andrightaway,I’mshocked—he’stattooed.Ihadnoidea.Hewasinsideme—
twice—andIneversawhischest.
Willowputsherhandsdownandswallows,she’slookingatwhatI’mstaringattoo.“So…you
havethatthingIneededtoborrow?”sheasksmestillgawkingatMerritt.
***
“Biggest fish of the day gets three hundred and fifty dollars,” Ari says as we all get situated
aroundthefishingholestheguysdrilled.It’ssurprisinglysunnyandnottoocold.
Ijigmypoleoffthebottomofthelake,andArisaystome,“Youknowyou’reonlyscaringthe
fishawaybydoingthat.”
Istickmytongueoutathim.He’sjusttryingtogetundermyskin.Everyyearthisistheone
thingIconsistentlywin.Igrewupfishingwithmydad—he’sthebest,soI’vegotatrickortwoupmy
sleeve.
“Don’tbejealous.Youcanjusthandthemoneyovernow,ifyou’dlike.”
Theguysallbustuplaughing,andMerrittasksme,“You’rereallythatconfident?”
“I’vewonthiseveryyearwe’vefished…soyeah,Iam.”
Merrittrollshiseyes,andjustthenIgetanibble.Iwaitforthesecondbitebeforehookingit,
andonceIdo,theyallgawkatme.Thefishmustbebigasthetipofmypoleisbentlikean“n.”It’s
fighting coming up, and I keep the slack tight, taking my time. Kami gets one on too, and I see the
frustrationonAri’sfaceaswebothbattle.
Pulling my fish up, it’s massive. Ari throws his pole down and storms off walking in a big
circlelikeababy.“Oh…comeon,”IhollertohimasIremovethehookfromitsmouth.Rightaway
it’sobviousit’sakeeper.
Therestofthemorninggoesbythesame.Ikeephookingfishafterfish.Theothersdotoo,all
exceptforAriandMerritt.Arikeepsglaringatme,andIlookoutsideofourtentforMerrittbutdon’t
seehim.Hewalkedoutawhileago,Iassumetopeeorsomething,buthasn’treturned.KnowingIam
intheleadfishingwise,Ireelinmylineandgoinsearchofhim.Attheedgeofthelakeisasmall
hillandIcanseethetopofhishat.
Walkingtohim,theicecracksbeneathmyfeet,butIknowit’ssafe.TheyraceJeepsonthisice
everyyear.
WhenIreachMerritt,hehashishandsbeneathhisheadandiswatchingthesky.“Hey.”
“Hey,”herespondswithahugegrinonhisface.
“Whatareyoudoingouthere?”Iask.
“Youwantthetruth?”
“Always.”
“Tryingtokeepmydickdown.”
“Really?”
“Yeah,I…Idon’tknowifyouhavedrylipsorsomething,butthewayyoukeeplicking‘emhas
mydickreadytofuckyourmouth.”
Igigglealittleandliedownnexttohim.“Idon’tthinkI’veeverbeenfuckedinthemouth.”I
lookupatthesky,thefluffycloudsslowlyrollingbyastheymorphintoallsortsofdifferentthings.
Thesuniswarm,thereflectiononthesnowhelpingittowarmme.
“Youshouldletmedoittoyouthen.”
“Okay.”
“Really?”
“Sure.”
“When?” he questions me turning his head and the second I respond, “Now,” he reaches over
andpullsmybodyontopofhis.Takingmynose,Ibrushitagainsthis,lookingintohisclearbrown
eyes.
“Yousmellgood,”Itellhim.Hekissesme,ourmouthslingeringtogetherforamoment.
“I love the way you taste.” And with those words, we get lost, kissing one another. With me
lyingontopofhim,hisrockhardshaftisgrindingagainstme,andIpushbackagainsthim,wishing
hewereinsideofme.
Myglovedfingersdigdeepintothesnowandacoldbreezewhipsthroughtheair,coveringus
inafreshblanketofwhiteness.Westopkissing,butourmouthsarestillconnected.Ishiver,andhe
doesthesame.
“Holyfuck,thatwascold,”IspeakagainsthislipsasIpullbackatinybit.
“Yeah,itwas.”
“Weshouldprobablystop.”HeagreesandeventhoughIsaidit,Idon’twantto,butthetruthis,
thisisn’ttheplacetobemessingaround.
“Comeon.Ineedtocatchafish;Ican’thaveyouoneuppingme,”hechides.
“You’dneedtocatchseventobeatmysix,”Igloatandhopup,brushingthesnowoffofme.
Walking back to where the group is, he wraps his hand around mine, the gesture catching me off
guard. We agreed to fuck, nothing more, so him holding my hand worries me that he’s got other
intentions.
Chapter12
Merritt
“It’sallthere,”AritellsQuinnasshecountsherwinningsfromtoday.
“I’mjustmakingsure;Iknowhowyouliketoscampeople.”
“Please,thatwasonetimeandnotmyfault.”
“Whathappened?”Iask.Theybothlookateachother,waitingfortheotheronetotellme.
“Therentalcarcompanyneverchargedhimtheyearbeforelast,andhedidn’ttellthem.”
“Wouldyou?”Iaskher,andshenods,notgivingitasecondthought.“No,youwouldn’t.”
“Yeah,Iwould.”
“Whatever.”
Sherollshereyesatme,andIcouldspankherrightaboutnow.Tedfinishescleaningthefish
thatweallcaughttoday.EveryoneexceptforAricaughtone,whichwaskindafunnytoseehowmuch
ofababyhewasaboutit.
Quinnwalksofftohelpthegirls,andIaskAri,“What’stheplantomorrow?”
“I’mnotsure,maybeskiingagain.”
“Whatifwegosnowmobilingorsomething?”
“That’dbefun.Youwannabookaplace,andI’llpay?”Aswetalk,IhavemyeyesonQuinn’s
ass.“No.I’llpay.”
“Sodidyouhitthatyet,orwhat?”
Inod,andhegivesmeafistbump.“Wasitgood?”
“Fuckyeah,sweetpussy.”
“Sowhat’stheplan?”
“Noplan,we’rejustgonnahookupthisweekandthengoourseparateways.”
“Wow,lookatyou.Youguystalkedthisshitthroughandeverything.”
“I’m gonna go look at booking something for tomorrow. Jacob, Ted, you guys down to
snowmobile?
“Hellyeah.”
Igrabafreshbeerfromthefridgeandheadofftothebedroom.Sittingonthesofa,Igrabmy
iPad and do a Google search. “What are you doing?” Quinn asks me, coming in with a serious
expressiononherface.
“Wow,youjustcouldn’tstayaway,couldya?”
Sheshakesherheadandlocksthedoor,thenkneelsbetweenmylegs.Herbottomlipistucked
tightlyintoherteethassheliftsmyshirtandthenunzipsmypants.Bythetimeshewrestlesmycock
outfrominsidemyunderwear,it’srockhard.
Allofthebloodisrushingtothetip.Shelicksherlipsandthentakesmeintohermouth.She’s
soeagerasshesucksme,makingmyentirebodytingle.Icantellbyhowfastshe’sgoingthatshe
wantsmore.Pullingherback,Istopherandstandup.Thendirecthertositdownonthesofa.
Takingmyclothesallthewayoff,shewatchesmeintently,mybodywantingherevenmore.
“Youknow,Ididn’tknowyouhadtattoos,”shesays.
“No? Do you like them?” I ask her as she inspects my covered chest and I direct her to lean
back.Sotrustinglyshedoes,andIhopup,placingonelegonthecouch,leavingtheotherfootonthe
floor.“Openwide,baby.”Shelistenslikeagoodgirl.It’soneofthethingsthatturnsmeonsomuch
—she’s so willing. I nudge my dick into her sweet, sweet mouth, bracing my weight on the wall
behindusasmyhipsmoveinandoutofherfuckingtightlips.
Hertongueswirlsaroundme,andIdon’twanttogagher,butI’msounbelievablyhornythatI
just go farther and farther. And before long, I’m barreling in and out. She has her hands clenched
aroundmyasscheeks,herfingernailsdiggingintomyskin.“Yes,that’sit…takeallofme.”
Shemoanslettingmepushandpullinandoutofhermouth.Herhandskeeppushingmefaster,
andasmyballstighten,Ifightthefeeling.
Notalready.
Thenthere’sthatgoddamnannoyingknockonthedoor…again.Fuck,italwaysseemstocome
atthewrongtime.“Youguyscomingtothehotspringswithus?”Willowasksrightasmycomehits
me.
IpulloutofQuinn’smouth,grippingmyshaftatthebase,inhopesIcanstopit.“Yup,we’llbe
right there,” she says back, and it’s a lost cause. Cum shoots right onto her face. I jerk myself,
relishingintherelease.Quinnopenshermouthformeandletsmecomeonhertongue,lickingup
everybitshecan.
“God,shehastheworsttiming,”Itellher,aggravated,asIsqueezeouteverylastdrop.
“Youthink?”
“Clearly!I’mnotdoneyet,Quinn.Istillwanttofuckyou.”
“I guess it’ll have to wait then.” She slides out from underneath me and digs through her
suitcase. Her ass is bent over, and my needy cock tempts me. Pulling down her pants, I spread her
pussyandsliderightintoher.
“Ohfuck,”shecriesoutasIfillher,butshedoesn’tstopme.Iholdherasscheeks—theyboth
fitsocomfortablyinthepalmsofmyhands—asIbegintomove,innice,long,slowthrusts.
Shereachesforthedresserinfrontofherandholdsontoit.Herreflectionstaresbackatmein
themirror;shestillhasalittlecumonherface,andit’scompletelyhot.Hereyesaresogorgeousand
wanting.“Takeyourshirtoff,”Iorderherandrightawayshelistens,moaningintothesideofher
armtokeepquiet.
“CanIgofaster?”Iaskher,needingmore.WithQuinn,Ialwaysneedmore.
ShenodsandIpickupmypacealittlemoreeachtimeuntilIreachthepointwheremyballsare
slappingherclit.Hertitsbouncewitheverythrust,andsheholdson,lettingmegiveittoherharder
thanIeverhave.Andatthismoment,Idon’twantthistoendattheendoftheweek.Idon’twantto
stopwhatwe’vestarted.Ijustwanttohaveherandbewithherandfuckher,wheneverIwant,withno
rules.
Chapter13
Quinn
Asthesnowflakesswirlaroundus,theheatofthehotspringshasourbodiesblazing.Itisamazing
how something so natural and from the earth can not be affected by the elements above. The air is
freezing,butthewaterisaconsistentonehundredandtwodegreesyearround.
I can’t stop looking up at the twinkling stars, so bright at this elevation, and even more
illuminatedthroughthesheetofwhitenesscomingdownfromthesky.
Everyone is blitzed out of their minds, yelling and talking way louder than needed. But
thankfullyit’sjustushererightnow,probablybecauseit’ssocoldout.
I have a good buzz on and am totally content in this moment with Merritt’s arm behind me. I
neverimagined,beingsoskittishaboutmenbecauseofmypast,thatI’dbeanywherenearreadytolet
amanclosetome,evenforsex,letalonethiskindofintimacy.ButIhave,andwithMerritt,Ilikeit.
Theentiregroupundoubtedlycaughtontoushookingupwhenheheldmyhandtohelpme
intothewater,butnoonesaidathing,likeit’snormal.
“No,Merrittsaidhewastakingussnowmobilingtomorrow,”Arishouts,andIglanceupathim
withasmile.
Whatasweetgesture.
“Iam,”hetellseveryone.
“Didyougetitbooked?”Ariasks.
“Absolutely,weneedtoleaveataboutten.”
As everyone goes back to their conversations, Merritt whispers into my ear, “I didn’t book it
yet.Igotalittlepreoccupiedwithyourmouthandthatsweetpussyofyours.”
Mycheeksblushlikeaschoolgirl’s,andIlookathim,turnedonagain.
Hetakeshishandandslidesitinsidemybikini,rubbingmyclitwithhisfingers.Mybodyheats
fromthefrictionandthesteamofthewater.“Nothere,”Itellhim.
Hepouts,stickinghisbottomlipout,andIkissit.Thegroupmustbewatchingus‘causetheyall
whistleandcheer.Ismileandleanmyheadbackalittleembarrassed.“Don’tstop!”Ariyells.
Merrittliftsmychin,bringingmyeyesuptohisandkissesmeagainashepullsmeontohis
lap. With my fingers laced behind the back of his head, I stay up to my neck in the water and zone
everyoneelseoutfocusingonlyonMerritt.Onthemovementsofhistongueandthewayhishandson
mybodymakemewanttodothingsI’veneverdreamedofdoing.Likelettingamansitmedownon
acouchashefuckedmymouthandthencameonmyface,thewayhedidearlier.
I’mnotsayingI’maprude.Butwhenitcomestosex,myexperiencehasbeenveryvanilla.A
littleforeplay,thenyourtypicalpositions.Nothingroughoroutoftheordinary.Imean,justtheway
hebentmeovertonightandfuckedmesoharduntilIcamewasunreal.
Heslowsthekiss,ourforeheadsrestingagainstoneanotherashesays,“Comeon,let’sgo,or
I’mgonnaendupfuckingyourighthere.”
***
My heart is throbbing as Merritt kicks the bedroom door closed, a feeling I’m familiar with,
andIbegintoworrythatthiswon’tstopattheendoftheweek.Butithasto.I’mnotreadyforanother
relationship.Merrittisgreat;hereallyis,but…itcanonlybeaboutthesexforbothofoursakes,and
I’mstartingtofeelmoreforhimwhenIshouldn’tbe.
Hesetsmywetbodydowninthebathroomasheturnstheshoweron,andIblurtout,“Promise
meattheendoftheweekthiswillend?”
He looks back, caught off guard and a little confused, and responds, “Yeah, why would you
thinkitwouldn’t?”Ilookaroundthebathroom,searchingwithinmyselfforthewordstosaytohim,
andhecupsmyface.“What’sthematter,Quinn?”
“Nothing,justpromisemethatattheendoftheweek,thiswillend.”
“Youknowitwill.Weliveintwodifferentstatesandleadcrazybusylives.”
Inodregisteringhiswords.“Wegood?”
“Yeah.”
“Good. Now don’t ruin this moment. Remember what you said when I met you?” I shake my
head, only able to remember him walking in on me shirtless and the feeling of sheer shock that a
stranger saw me half-naked. “You told me, ‘This vacation is about unwinding and letting go.’ Now
that’swhatyouneedtodo.Giveintowhatyourbodywantsandstopworryingabouttherest,okay?”
Inodashetakesbothofhishandsandcupsmycheeks,studyingmylipsbeforeheleansinto
them and kisses me. The gesture is so tender and sweet that I melt into him, letting all my fears of
betrayalandhurtwashaway.
Thiswon’tgopastthisweek;itwon’t.
Slowly, he takes one of his hands and slides it down my body, untying my swimming suit at
everypointwhereit’sknotted.Asitfallsfrommycoldskin,Istandnaked,andheremoveshisshorts
joiningme,hiscockbobbingasitspringsfree.
Then he steps into the shower, and I gladly follow. His dark brown eyes glimmer in the low
lightofthebathroomandItrytolistentohiswords.Lettinggoofalltheshitthathashappenedtome,
that’smademesoguarded.Thisisjustaweekofsex,andthat’sit.
ThewarmwaterpeltsmyskinasMerritttakeseachofmybreastsintohishandsandlicksthe
nippleofoneandthentheother.Iknotmyfingersintohishairandreachforhiscockwithmyother
hand,grippinghimhardaroundthebaseofhisshaft.HegroansfrommytouchandasIbegintojerk
myhand,pleasinghim,hepullsmybodytowardshisandthenslidesinsideofme.
“OhGod,”Icryout.
“Letmehearyou,”hecommands,andImoanintohisear,makingsurethatIkeepmynoises
undercontrol,sotherestofthehousedoesn’thearastheywereobviouslyinterestedinwhatwewere
doing.Aswestandfucking,hisbigcockrubbingmerightwhereIlike,Ifocusonlyonthepleasure,
becausethatiswhatthisisallabout.
Chapter14
Merritt
With Quinn’s hands wrapped tightly around my waist, we fly through the forest, leading the group
backtothelodgefromoursnowmobilingtrip.
It’sbeensuchafunday,lotsoflaughsandgoodtimes.Isomehowwasabletofindaplaceto
bookuslastminute,andI’mgladIdidbecauseit’sbeenthemostfunwe’vehad.
Withthelodgeinsight,Ipullthethrottleallthewayback,knowingwhoevermakesittherefirst
wins.Butbehindus,Ihearsomeruckus.Releasingmygrip,IglancebackandspotAriflyingthrough
theair.
Oh,fuck!
Immediately,Ihitthebrakes,andweskidtoastop.He’slyingonhisback,heavingforair.Ican
hearitfromfiftyfeetaway,andIpanic,notknowingwhattodo.Noneofushavecellphones,then
Quinn,thinkingquickly,says,“I’llruntothelodge.”AsfastasIcan,Igotomyfriend’ssideashe
liesonthesnow,gasping,hisfacestrained…hecan’tbreathe.
“Shit,man,areyouallright?”
He’swincing;hiseyestightlyclosedasherollsbackandforthinpain.Willowrunsovertous,
followedbytherestofthegroupandshe’sfreakingout.“OhmyGod!Areyouokay?”
Hedoesn’trespondtoeitherofus,andIfeelfuckingterriblethatmydumbideadidthistohim.
“Justhangon.Quinnwenttogethelp.”
His breathing sounds horrific, his face keeps getting redder and redder, and I shake my head
wantingtohelphim,butnotknowinghowto.“Calmdown,Ari,”Willowsaystohim,andhesnapsat
her.“Itfuckinghurts!”
Dammit,I’msofuckingpissedthatIcameupwiththisstupidassidea.
Quinncomesbackovertouswithafewguysfromtherentalshop,andastheykneelaround
him,weallbackaway.“Thankyou,”Itellher.
“Ofcourse,isheokay?”
“I’mnotsure.”
Shewrapsherhandaroundmine,squeezingmyfingerstightly.Herwarmthcomfortingmein
thisfuckedupmoment.AsIstandholdingherback…wejustwatch.
An ambulance pulls up at the lodge, and a few paramedics rush over to us. One of them is
carryingabodyboard.
Ihateseeingmybestfriendinpain.Itmakesmesick.Thisismyfault.Thetalltreesspinand
snowwhipsthroughtheairasIstandcompletelyfrozen.
Ari and I might fight like brothers, but that is because we are brothers. Maybe not through
blood,butheismybestfriend.Myguttightensinfearwatchinghimgetstrappeduptotheboardand
thengetcarriedaway.
Willowisclosebehind,andweallfollowthem.Finally,Iaskbeforetheambulancedoorsclose,
“Ishegoingtobeokay?”
“Hewillbe.Itlookslikehehasacollapsedlungfromtheimpactofthecrash.Weneedtoget
himtothehospitalquickly.”
Willow looks at me from the back of the ambulance, and I could punch something, so pissed
thishappened.Thentheyaregone.“Comeon.”Quinntugsmyhand,pullingmetowardsthecarand
inadaze,Igetinside.
“He’sgoingtobeokay,”shetellsme.
Inod,listeningtoherwords,tryingtobelievethemasTeddrivesusaway.
***
Afterwhatseemslikehoursofwaitingforanupdate,Willowfinallywalksout.Quinn’shandis
stillwrappedaroundmine,andIdon’tdareletitgo.Thecomfortofholdingontoherhasmademe
notlosemymindwhilewe’vebeenwaiting.
“Howishe?”
“Hehasacouplecrackedribs,onethatpuncturedhislungandwasmakingithardforhimto
breathe,buthe’sgoingtobeokay.”
ThankGod.
“Canweseehim?”Iask.
“He’sresting,theyhavehimonatonofdrugs.Hesaidforusalltogohomeandgetdrunk,for
him.”
“Thatsoundslikehim,”Tedsays,andQuinnkissesmycheekasIletoutabreathofairthatI
feellikeI’vebeenholdingontoallday.
“Merritt?”Willowsays,asweallstandandpreparetoleave.
“Hesaidtotellyouhe’llpayforthesnowmobile.”
“No,fuckthat.Idon’tcareaboutthemoney.Ishouldn’thavebookedthetriptobeginwith.”
Shesmilesandsays,“Don’tthinklikethat.Wehadfun.”
“Yeah,butlookatAri.”
“He’llbefine,andyoudidn’tmakehimcrash,hedid.He’sreckless,andwebothknowit.It’s
howhelives.”
“Thanksforsayingthat,”Itellher.
“It’sthetruth.”ShegivesTedahugandkiss.
“Doyouwantmetostay?”Iaskher,“Idon’tmindatall.”
“No,yougobacktothehouseandrelax.”
“No,yougo.Letmestay.”
“Areyousure?”sheasksme.
“Yeah,ofcourse.”
“Okay,he’dprobablyratheryoubehereanyway.Heshouldbereleasedinthemorning,soI’ll
bebackearly.Thankyou,Merritt.”
“Absolutely.”
StillholdingontoQuinn’shand,Ilookdownatourfingersandbringthemtomylipsasher
blueeyeslookdeepintome.“Gogetsomerest,sexy.”Sheblinksafewtimesbeforeoffering,“Ican
staywithyou.”
I smirk. “Look at you; Miss This-Can-Only-Last-A-Week doesn’t want to be away from me.”
Shepullsherhandaway,andIkisshercheek,thenwhisperintoherear,“Ifyoustayed,I’dhaveto
fuckyou,andIdon’tthinkAriwouldappreciatethat.He’dwanttojoinin,andI’mnotabouttoshare
you.”
Shenodswithasmile,andIbreatheherscentinonefinaltimeandthenrealizethateveryoneis
watchingus.“Bye.”
“Goodbye,”shesaysback,lickingherbottomlipknowingjustwhatthatdoestome.
“He’sinroom110,”Willowgivesmeahugandthentheyareallgone.MyeyesareonQuinn
foraslongasIcanseeher,andthenIshakemyhead.Justaweek,Iremindmyself…that’sit.
WalkingtofindAri,Ifollowthesignstotheroomsfrom100-119.AsIstandinhisdoorway,he
isasleep,andasquietlyasIcan,Istepinside.
Helooksupatmerightaway,hiseyesglossyandtired.“What’sup,man?”
“Notmuch.Howyoufeeling,Spiderman?”
Hechuckles.“Soreasfuck,butthemedicineishellagood,andmynurseisfuckin’smoking.”
“Yougonnahitthatshit?”Iteasehim
“Iwish.Icanbarelybreathe.Where’sQuinn,sheletyouoffyourleash?”
Igivehimthemiddlefinger.“Youknowme;nowoman’sgonnatiemedown.”
“Idon’tknow;youseemtolikethatone.”
“She’scool,sexwithherisoffthecharts,butwealreadyagreedtothingsbeingjustthisweek.”
“That’sgood,man,yougottafocusonwork.It’snotlonguntilyouownthatcompany.”
“Ican’twait,Ari.Youhavenofuckingidea.”
HiseyesgetheavyasIcontemplatehowthosewordscouldneverbemoretrue.Ican’twaitfor
thedaymydadturnsthecompanyovertome.Ideserveit,anditcan’tcomesoonenough.I’veputup
withmoreofhisshitthananyonereallyshould,andI’vesacrificedmorethanI’dliketoadmit.Butin
theend,I’llhaveitall.
Chapter15
Quinn
“Can’tsleep?”Kamiasksme,walkingdownstairsasIgazeatthelastoftheembersofthefire.
“No.You?”
“Meneither.Jacobistossingandturningandtalkingandsnoring.”Ilaughattheimageandtell
her,“Grabaglass,comejoinme.”
Shelooksatthebottleofwineonthetableinfrontofme.Bringinganemptyglassover,she
fillshersupandtakesaseatnexttomeonthefloor.
“Whyareyouup?”
I hand her Merritt’s iPad which I used to check my email, and unfortunately there was a new
messagefrommyex.Asshereadstheemail,shegrimacesandthensetstheiPaddown.“Whydon’t
youblockhisemail?”shequestionsme.
“Ihave,andhejustkeepscreatingotherbogusnewones.”
“Thenchangeyouremail.Youdon’tdeservetobespokentothewayhedoes.”
“I guess a part of me was hoping that he’d see I blocked him and know how hurt I was and
apologizeforeverything.”
“Quinn,guyslikehimdon’tsaytheyaresorry.They’reonehundredpercentassholes,andyou
needtostayaway.”
“I hear ya, Kami.” Her words make sense. But a part of me still misses what we had. It might
havebeenashort-livedromance,buthewasreallysweetandgoodtome.Untilhewasn’t.
“Whatareyouthinkingabout?”sheasksme.
Swallowingalargegulpofwine,Itellher,“ThatIneedtopickbetterguys.”
“LikeMerritt?”
Ishakemyhead,butshecanseethatjustbysayinghisname,Igetlostinthoughtsofhimtoo.
“Youlikehim,don’tyou?”
“No,Ilikesleepingwithhim,butthat’sit.”
“Sure,Quinn.”Sheclearlydoesn’tbelieveme,butshealsodoesn’tprobefurther.Regardless,
hercommenthasmyheadspinning.DoIlikehim?IstheremoretowhatIamfeelingwithhimthan
justsex?Isthatwhatallthisisabout?It’snotthatIwantmyextoapologizeorforanythingwithhim
towork,maybeIwantthingswithMerritttowork.Jesus,thisisallsofrustrating.Eveniftherewasa
way, I couldn’t give in to it—we live so far apart and are both basically married to our careers.
Neitherofushastimeforanythingelse,especiallyarelationship;thatmuchisblindinglyclear.
“Merrittisagooddistraction,I’mhavingfunonthistrip,butit’snothingseriousandwon’tlast
pastthisweek.”
“But,whatifitdid?”
“It won’t, Kami.” I refill my glass and top hers off. “Enough about me, how are you and
Jacob?”
“Allright.We’regood;he’sbeentryingreallyhard.”
A few months back Kami and Jacob went through a rough patch, she was feeling a total
disconnect from him and finally confronted him about it. He blamed it on the stress of work, and I
guessmadeachange.IthinkJacobisagoodguyandreallylovesher,hejustneededarealitycheck.
Sometimeswealldo.
Igotitwhenmyexbrokeupwithme.Itwasaclearsigntostayawayfrommen.Theyaren’t
good for anything, except their dicks, which in turn reminds me, I could use Merritt’s right about
now.
***
Dammit,Idranktoomuch.
Ihaven’tevenopenedmyeyesyet,andIcantellit’sgoingtobebrutal.Takinginadeepbreath.
Istretchandthenblinkafewtimes.TheimageofMerrittstartlesme.“Whatthefuck?”
“Sorry,”herespondsinnocentlysittingontheedgeofthebednexttome.
“It’sokay.Wereyouwatchingme?”Iask.
“No!”Herubsthebackofhisneck,undoubtedlylying,“Ijustsatdown.”
“How’sAri?”
“He’sgood;he’shere.”
“Really?Thatwasfast.Whattimeisit?”
“Two.”
“Intheafternoon?”
“Yeah,haveyoubeenasleepsincelastnight?”
“Uhhh,Ifellasleepataboutthree.”
“Damn,stayingupthatlate,Icould’vefuckedyousomanytimes.”
Igetuptopeeandknowlateronthat’sallwe’llbedoing.“Niceshirt.”
IlookdownandrealizethatI’mwearingoneofhist-shirts.Imust’veputitonwhenIwasdrunk
andstumblingintobed.
“Thanks,I’mkeepingit.I’mgonnashowerandtrytowakeup.”
Turningonthewater,Ipopafewaspirinfrominsideofmymakeupbagandlookbackatmy
palereflectioninthemirror.God,Ilooklikeshit.
Gettingintotheshower,Itrytowashawayallofmyworriesandthefuckedupthoughtsthatare
stillgoingthroughmymind.
Chapter16
Merritt
I go to follow Quinn into the bathroom because I need to fuck her and now, but my iPad stops me
deadinmytrackssittingonthecouchintheroom.Ileftitinmybag,sowhyisitout?Igrabitand
openitup.
Onthescreenisanemail:
To:
From:
November3,2016,1:15am
Quinn,
Icanseeyoublockedmyemail,why…I’mnotsure.Well,letmeassureyouthiswillbemy
lastonetoyou.You’llneverseemeagain;I’mdonewithyou.I’mnotsurewhyIwastedmytime
withyourstupid,immature,fatassinthefirstplace.Obviously,ImadetherightdecisionwhenI
letyougo.EverythingIevertoldyouorpromisedyouwasalie.Ihopelifescrewsyouover,the
wayyoudeserve,webothknowyouwereonlywithmeformymoney.Gofuckyourself,Quinn!
Reading the hateful email again, I am in shock. What kind of a cruel person would speak to
anyonelikethat,especiallyawoman?Quinnisamazinganddeservestheworld.Sheisnotfat,stupid,
oranyofthethingshecalledher.
Clicking“reply”tothemessage,mybloodissohotasIcontemplatearesponse.
From:
November5,2016,2:18pm
Whenyouhitsend,youshouldbemorecarefulofyourwords.I’mwithQuinnnowandjustread
youremail.Obviously,Icantellrightoffthebatthatyouareafuckinglunatic.Whatawaytotalktoa
woman—no wonder she found a real man. Let this be a warning that if you ever try to contact her
again,inanyway,orupsether,Iwillpersonallyfindyouandmakeyoufuckingpayforit,thewayyou
deserve!Nowgofuckyourself,youprick!
Withouthesitation,Iclick“send”andlogoutofheremail.ThenItakeadeepbreathandstrip
naked,findingherjustgettingoutoftheshower.“Iwasgoingtojoinyou.”
“Maybelater,”shesays,withthemostgorgeousexpression.SwiftlyIkissher,thengetintothe
showermyself.“Sodidyoumissmelastnight?”IaskherasIbegintowashmyself.
“Maybe.”
“Damn,whyyougottabesocold?Imissedyou.”
“Really?”
“Uhhuh.Whatdidyoudowithoutme?”
“Playedspinthebottleandmadeoutwitheveryone.”
Iopentheshowerdoorandglareatherasshecombsherwethair.“I’mjoking,”shesays.
“Please,don’tfuckwithmelikethat.Idon’tsharewell.”
ShesmilesandnodsasIclosethedoor.
“IgotdrunkwithKami,andwejustchilled.”
“That’scool.”Shedoesn’tbringupherexemailingher,andI’mnotsureifshewould.Imean,
we’renottogether,eventhoughItoldhimwewere.ButIwanthertoknowthatI’mhereforherno
matterwhatorhowfuckedupthesituationis.
“How’sAridoing?”sheasksme.
“He’s good. You know how he is…he’s a funny fucker; there’s not much that can bring him
down.”
“Notevenspendingthenightinthehospital?”
“Nah,hewaslaughingthewholeaccidentupanddigginghisnurse,whoinmyopinionwaslike
afouroutofaten.Ithinkthepainmedshadhimseeingshitorsomething;itwasfunny.”
“Youcanalwaysguaranteethathe’llmakeyoulaugh.”
“True.” I get out of the shower and right as I open her towel, there is a knock on the door.
“Seriously?IfeellikeI’mlivingathomeagain.”Shegrabshertowelfrommygripandwinksatmy
cockassheslipsoutoftheroom.Dryingmybody,Ithinkofthosehatefulwordsthatmakemewant
tofindtheguybehindthemandsmashhisfacein.ButIremindmyselfofwhatshewants,andit’sjust
thisweek…nothingmore.Soit’snotmyplace.
***
As I sit back driving Quinn’s car to pick up dinner since Ari can’t go out, I can tell she is
watchingme.“What?”Iask.
“Nothing.” She looks out the other window, and I spot the restaurant up ahead. There is a
parkingspotonthestreet,andIsnagit,parallelparkingherJeep.“Youwanttowaitinthecar?”Iask.
“No,Iwanttocome.”
Webothgetout.Thechillintheairisprettyrough,andIwrapmyarmaroundher,pullingher
bodytightlytomineaswewalkalongthesidewalk.“Thanksfordriving,”shetellsme.
“Ofcourse,anytime.I’msorryyouhaveaheadache.”
“It’sokay;it’llgoaway.”
IopenthedoortothelavishrestaurantthatWillowordereddinnerfromandthehostessgreets
usandthenasks,“Justtwoofyoutonight?”
AsmuchasI’dlovetotakeheroutonarealdate,that’snotwhywe’rehere.“Uhh,no.Wehave
apickuporder.”
“What’sthename?”
“It’sunder‘Willow.’”
Thegirllooksatthecomputerscreen,totallylost,andIglanceatQuinn,givingherthatlook.
“Umm, it looks like the kitchen is just starting on your order now, would you mind waiting
abouttentofifteenminutes?”
“Okay,”Irespond,thechatterandcommotionsoloud,I’mnotevensureifsheheardme.
Quinn and I sit on a bench by the door; she rests her head on my shoulder, and I tell her, “I
really hate it when people ask me if I’d mind waiting. What I want to say is, ‘Do I have another
choice?’”
Shelaughsalittleandthenresponds,“Metoo.”
The noise somehow gets louder in here, I can tell it’s hurting her head by the way she’s
squintinghereyes,soIdirecthertostand,andweheadoutside.
“Whydon’twewaitinthecar?”Itellher.
“Okay,”shesaysandaswewalkbacksomethinginthewindowofoneofthestorescatchesher
eye. She does a double take, and I try to see what it is, but there’s so much in there that I can’t tell.
“Let’sgoinside,”Ioffer,andshesmiles.
Walking into the long and narrow store, the atmosphere is calm, and the lighting is bright,
showcasingtheshelvespackedfullwithsomuchcrap.Thishasgottobeatouristhotspotforsure.
Quinngoesrightforthewindowandtouchesathin,elegantsilverbraceletwithsomesortofacharm
onit.
“Thatit?”Iask.
“Yeah. For my sixteenth birthday, my parents got me a bracelet just like this, and I wore it
everywhere.”
Icantellbythemonotonetohervoice,thatshenolongerhasit.“Whathappenedtoit?”
“I don’t know. I had it one day, then it was gone the next, I have no clue where it went. I’ve
searchedforyears,andit’snevershowedup.”
Islideitoffthejewelryholderandplaceitonherwrist.Shelooksdownatitwithasmile,so
genuineandhappy.“Getit,”Itellher.
“Idon’thavemywallet.”
“I’llbuyitforyou.”
“No,Icouldn’t.”
“It’snobigdeal,please.”
Sheflicksthetinycharmthatisshapedlikeaboxandsaystome,“CanIpayyouback?”
“I’dratheryoudidn’t.”
“That looks gorgeous on you,” the store clerk comes up and says. “Thanks,” Quinn tells her,
andtheclerkasksus,“CanIhelpyoufindanythingelse?”
Reachingintomypocket,Igrabmycreditcardandpassittothewoman,“Nope,justthis.”
The woman walks off to ring the bracelet up and Quinn wraps her arms around my neck,
kissingmegently.“Thankyou,I’llrepayyou.”
“You’rewelcome,andno,youwon’t.”
Chapter17
Quinn
“You didn’t tell me you found your bracelet,” Willow exclaims as I find myself playing with it the
wayIalwaysusedto.
“Ididn’t.Merrittboughtitformetonightwhenwewerewaitingfordinner.”
“Really?”
“What?YouthinkI’mnotcapableofbuyingherthings?”hechimesin.
“No,that’snotit.I’msurprisedsheletyoubuyit,beingMissIndependentandall.”
“Oh,shewantedtopaymeback.Sheevengotallstupidaboutitwhenwegothome,butIputher
inherplace.”
Ilookathim,andhewinksatme.Ididgetalittleupsetwhenherefusedtotakemymoneyonce
wereturnedtothehouse,butIdidn’tthrowafit.
“Didyouputawishinityet?”Willowasksme.
“No,I’mstillthinkingonit.”
“Wish?”Merrittasksme.
“Yeah.You’resupposedtowriteawishdown,folditupandplaceitinsidethebox.”
Merrittnodshishead,andaswelookatoneanother,Ifindmyselfthinkingaboutmywishand
whatit’dbe.WhatdoIreallywantinlife?JustthenAriemergesandslowlywalksdownstairs.“You
shouldn’tbeup,”Willowsays,runningtohisside.
“I’mfine,”hebrushesheroffandtriestomakehiswaytothecouch,butsheturnshimaround
and walks him right back to bed. “Night, Ari,” we all yell and he flips us off. He’s obviously
strugglingbeingstuckinbed.
“I’mturningintoo,”Itelleveryoneasmyheadisstillgivingmeadullthrobbingpain.
Walkingupstairs,Iliedownonthebed,closingmyeyes,hopingbymorningthatmyheadfeels
better.AsIliethere,IfindmymindisonMerritt.Heissosweetandcaring,whichisthelastthingI
expectedhimtobe.He’snotlikeanyothermanthatI’vebeenwith.Ihatethatwe’veonlygottwodays
left,soIwanttomakethemostofit.
Quietlyheenterstheroom.
“Night,guys,”Willowsayswalkingby.
“Night,”webothrespondandIlookoverathim.Hehasabottleofwaterinhishandandpasses
ittomeashesitsdown.
“Youfeelinganybetter?”
“Notreally,”Itellhimandtakeasmallsip.
Hepullshisshirtoverhishead,andmyeyesaredrawntohisamazingtattoos.Thesebedsare
sosmall,asheclimbsinbehindmewebarelyfit.ButI’vegrowntolikesnugglingtogetherwhenwe
sleep.Wrappinghisarmstightlyaroundme,Iclosemyeyes.Theroomisverytranquil;thewarmth
ofhisbodyalongmineissocomforting.
“Whatareyougoingtowishfor?”heasksme,touchingthesmallboxonmybracelet.
“I don’t know yet,” I answer him honestly. My mind is sending me so many mixed signals,
making me feel things with Merritt that I never imagined I would. But I push them away to protect
myself,theonlywayIknowhow,thewayIpromisedmyselfIwouldaftermylastbreakup.
IstayinthismomentbecauseI’velearnedbetterthananyonethatthesetwodayswillflybyand
assoonasweleavehereandgoourseparateways,he’llforgetallaboutme.Iremindmyselfhe’s
probablynodifferentthantheothermenI’vebeenwith.Evenifheseemsdifferentnow.
***
Wakingup,thesunisbarelylightingthemorningsky,andIhavetopee.Merrittissoundasleep,
still holding my body tightly against his. Gently, I kiss his arm, then lift it and slip out of his hold.
Lookingbackatthewayhestretchesinthetinybed,it’sobvioushislargebodyiswaytoobigforit.
Traipsingintothebathroom,Irealizethatmyheadnolongerhurts.ThankGod,Idon’tthinkI
could’veenduredanotherdayofpain.AfterI’mdonepeeing,Iwashmyfaceandthengobackinto
thebedroom,butMerrittisnolongerinbed.
I glance around the room and before I can spot him, his arms are around me. He’s standing
behindme,hislargecockreadyandhardforme.“Morning,”hesays,hisvoiceroughasheguides
metositonthecouch.Ilookupathim,starknakedandsofuckinghot.Hetakesthesashoffofoneof
thecurtainsandplacesitovermyeyes,awakeningallmyothersenses.
Forcefully,hetightensitbehindmyheadandasksme,“Doyoutrustme?”
“ShouldI?”Iaskhiminreturn.
“Ihopeso.”
Thenhedirectsmetolieback,myeyesfightingtoseewhatheisdoing,buteverythingisdark.
Takinghisfingers,heslidesthembeneaththesidesofmypantsandshimmiesthemdownmylegs;
thenheremovesmyshirt.Myheartispounding,eagerforwhathehasinstore.
Hishandsareonmybody,touchingandteasingmytenseskinbeforehespreadsmylegswide
andsettlesbetweenthem,blowingacoolbreathofaironmywetpussy.Hesays,“Mmmm,yousmell
likeheaven.”
IurgemyhipstowardshimasItrytolookthroughthesash,butIcan’tseeathing.Heseparates
mypussyandwrapshislipsdownaroundmyclit.Rightaway,Itense,andhebeginstokissandflick
backandforthwithhistongue,pleasingme.
I moan loudly, and he covers my mouth, quieting me, but not breaking our contact. As he
pleasesme,Ifightwhatheisdoingnotwantingtogiveoversofast,butanintenseorgasmhitsme
automatically, causing him to push hard against me, pulling it out of my system, like it’s his to
control.Mymufflednoisesarequietedbyhishandashecupsmymouthalittleharder.
Mybodystopspulsating,andhepullsaway.Iwaitforwhatisnext,andhebeginskissingme,all
over.Myfingersareknottedinhishairlovinghowhislipsfeelonmybody.“Youtastesogood,”he
tellsme.
“Let me taste you,” I tell him, and he doesn’t answer. Instead he continues kissing me. Even
thoughIjustcame,mybodyishornyandeagerforhim.Iallowhimtotakehistime,dousingmewith
affection,andthenhestopsandnudgeshiscockagainstmylips.Iopenwide,takinghimin,wishing
thatIcouldseehim,butalsolikingthewaytheblindfoldhasmelostinaworldwhereonlyMerritt
andIexist.
Imoanagainsthisshaft,grippingthebaseasIsuckhim.Everycontourofhisrigiddicketches
itselfintomymemory.Hemovesslowlybutgivesmeallofhim.Igripharder,andhedoesn’tlast
long before he pulls away. I lie there, breathless and panting, wanting more of him. “Why did you
stop?”IaskandbeforeIcananswer,he’sinsideme.Hishandsholdmylegsopenwide,soourbodies
blendclosetogether.Hemovesinandoutofme,causingeveryfiberofwhoIamtofocusonlyonthe
pleasureandasIgetlostinthismoment,heasksme,“Doesthishavetoend?”
Icontemplatehowtoanswerhim,andslowly,lifttheblindfoldoffofmyeyes.Helooksatme,
sowantonlyandeventhoughI’mscared,Idon’twantittoendeither.Butdeepdown,webothknowit
has to. It’ll never work. And if for some reason we were to force things and give it a try, I’m not
ready. I’m damaged and need to fix myself before I can even think I’m emotionally able for a
relationship.
Chapter18
Merritt
AfterQuinnandIfuckedthismorning,she’sbeenquiet…moredistant,andIknowit’sbecauseofthe
questionthatIaskedherthismorning.IknewIshouldn’thavesaidanything;itwasintheheatofthe
moment,andIletmymouthspeakwhatIwasfeeling.Shecouldn’tevenanswerme;shejustshook
herhead,andnow…everythingfeelsdifferent.
She agreed to a week with me, and that’s it. So I’ve gotta let go of any thoughts I’m having
aboutwantingmore.Plus,whoamIkidding?Idon’thavetimetodate.Ibarelyhavetimeformyself
whenI’mhome.
“I’mgonnagoforawalk,”shesays,grabbingherscarfandgloves.
“CanIjoinyou?”Iask,wantingtogetthingsbacktonormalbetweenus.
“Sure.”
I get dressed and meet her downstairs. Since Ari got hurt, we haven’t done much as a group,
minushangingoutatthehouse,whichisunderstandable,butattimesit’sboring.
WillowandTedarewatchingamovieonthecouchwithAri.KamiandJacobmustbeintheir
room.
As we step outside, the cold air sends a chill through my bones, and I zip my coat. We walk
down the driveway, and automatically I grab her hand, she blinks a few times, searching for her
wordsandIjustwanttotryandfixthings.“I’msorryforearlier.Ishouldn’thaveopenedmymouth.”
“It’sokay.I’msorryforhowIactedtoo.”
“Don’tbe,”Itellher.“Ishouldn’thaveaskedyouthat.Wehadanagreement,andIgotcarried
awayintheheatofthemomentand—”
“It’s okay, Merritt,” she cuts me off. “You don’t need to explain yourself. It’s not you that’s
messedup,it’sme.”
“CanIaskyousomething,Quinn?”
“Sure.”
“What’shappenedtomakeyousoscaredtodateagain?”
Shelaughsawkwardly,“Idon’tknowwhatitis,butallofmyrelationshipsalwaysendbadly.”
“Whydoyouthink?”
“Idon’tknow.Eversincehighschool,everyrelationshipI’vebeeninhasendedbecauseeither
theguyhasliedtomeorcheatedonme.”
“You know I’d never do that to you, right?” She rolls her eyes and doesn’t respond, looking
overatme.“Imeanit,Quinn.”
“YouandIdon’tevenliveinthesamestate.Haveyouevertriedalong-distancerelationship?”
“No,you?”
“Yes,mylastonewas,andI’mtellingyou,Iwon’tdoitagain.I’msorry,ithasnothingtodo
withyou.Ilikeyou,andthetimewesharetogether,butonceweareapart,I’msureyourfeelingswill
change,andlikeIsaid,I’mnotreadytodate.Ineedsometimetofixmyself.”
Thegroundbeneathusshifts,thesoundofthecrackingissoloudthatI’mnotsurewhattodo.
AndbeforeIcanreacttoherwideandscaredeyes,Irealizehowbadofanideaitwastowalkonthe
lakewefishedafewdaysagowithhowsunnyit’sbeen.
“Don’tmove.”
“Okay,”shesays,visiblyscared,buttrusting.AsIsteptomyright,theicecracks.Quinnfalls
in,herscreamsechoingoffthecanyonsurroundingus.Instinctively,Ireachforherarmsandholdon
toherasI’mnowlyingflatonmystomach.Herfaceiscontortedwithfear.“Igotyou.Igotyou,”I
tell her and know I have to get her out of the freezing water quickly. Scooting myself backwards, I
slowlypullheroutandpraythattheicedoesn’tgiveagain.
Each shift of our weight causes a thud beneath us. My heart pounds harder than I can ever
remember.Quinnisfrightened,Icanseeitinhereyes,andIpraythatIcangetusoutofthis.
Itdoesn’ttakemelong;I’vewonhalfofthebattle.Withbothofuslyingontheice,herteethare
chattering,andverycalmlyItellher,“Spreadyourlegsapartandscoottotheedgeoftheice,it’snot
toofar.”
“No,I’mnotleavingyouhere.”
“Goddammit,Quinn,go!”Iyellather.
Tearsfillhereyes,andshescootsawayfromme.Icanfeeleachtimeshemoves,andtheice
makes noises beneath my body. Waiting for what feels like an eternity, I can’t believe this has
happened.Thenshefinallysaysthewords.“I’mofftheice.”
Takinginadeepbreath,Icontemplategettingupandrunning.WonderingifIcouldoutrunthe
crackingice,likeinthemovies.ButIdon’tdareriskit,notwhileQuinn’sshiveringbodyiswaiting
forme.
AsIscootalong,thenoiseshavemefearingIwon’tmakeit.ButQuinn’seyeskeepmegoing,
andfinally,Imakeitofftheice.Shethrowsherselfaroundme,andIliftherwet,shiveringbodyin
myarms,joggingbacktothehouseasfastasIcan.
“Areyouokay?”Iaskher.
“Ithinkso.”Herlipsareblueandteethstillchattering.
Rushinginside,everyonelooksatus,shocked,asIburstthroughthedoorandIheadstraight
towardsourbathroom.“OhmyGod,whathappened?”Willowasks.
“Shefellthroughtheice,”Irespondandstarttheshower.Quinnisstandinginthemiddleofthe
room,clearlyinshockasherbodyistrembling.
“Shouldn’twecall911?”Willowasks.
“Shewasonlyinthewaterforthirtysecondstops;she’snotdisoriented.Idon’tthinksheneeds
togotothehospital.”
“Quinn,doyouwantmetocallanambulance?”Willowasksher,andsheshakesherheadasI
helpherundressandthengetherintotheshower.Thehotwatersurroundsherbody,slowlycalming
herchatteringteeth.
“CanIgetyousomething?”Willowasksher.
“Dryclothes,”ItellWillowandstripnakedmyself,gettinginsidetheshowerwhileWillowis
gone.
Quinn’s body shakes as I rub my hands up and down her arms, trying to help circulate her
blood. Slowly, I watch the life come back to her as the color returns to her face. Thank God, she’s
okay.I’mnotsurewhatIwould’vedonehadsomethinghappenedtoher.
“Thankyouforsavingme,”shesays,andIkissthetopofherwethair.
WithQuinninmyarms,Ihaveatightholdonher,realizinginthismomentaswestandhere
together,justhowpreciouslifeis.Todaywebothcould’vediedandthenwhat?Whatwouldthingsbe
like in a world with no Quinn and no Merritt? The thought is unsettling, and I hold her tighter and
harder.ProcessingtherealitythataftertomorrowmylifewillnothaveQuinninit,andIdon’tknow
howtodealwiththat.
Chapter19
Quinn
SittingontheedgeofthetinybedthatMerrittandIsharedforthebetterpartofaweek,I’mreally
going to miss this place. Looking at the door to the room and the spot where we first laid eyes on
eachother,IneverthoughtI’dfeelthewayIdoabouthim,buthe’sshownmesomuchandprovedto
methatmaybenotallmenarealike.
Thisweekhasbeensuchawhirlwind.Ithasflownby;frombodyshots,tobeingkissedinthe
forest,toagameofTruthorDarelikenoother,towatchingthecloudsrollby,andtothemostmind-
blowingsex,it’sallbeenthebest,andI’llalwaysholdthosememoriesclosetome.ForChrist’ssake,
hesavedmylife.
“Youready?”Merrittasksme,poppingintotheroom.
“Iam.”Itakehishand,andheyanksmeoffthebed.“I’mgonnamissyourlips.”
“Justmylips?”Iteasehimashekissesme.
“Yup…that’sall.”
Ismileandfollowhimasweheaddownstairstosaygoodbyetoeveryone.
“Thankyouforsuchanamazingtrip,”ItellAriasIhughimandunfortunatelysqueezealittle
bittoohard.Hewincesfromthepain.“Sorry.”
“It’sokay.Anytime,Quinn,youknowthat.”
Smilingbackathim,Isaymygoodbyestoeveryoneelse.“Callmeassoonasyou’rehome,”
Willowordersmeandhandsmebackmycellphone.
“Iwill.”Takingitbackfromher,IrealizeIreallydon’twantit.Thistimeawayfromobsessing
overmyphonehasbeensounbelievablyrefreshing.Butthistripisonlyaweek;nowit’sbacktothe
realworldandreallife.
“Whattimeisyourflight?”IaskMerrittasIhughimandhesays,“Two-thirty.”
“I’mgonnamissyou.”
Hecupsmyfacelookingdeepintomyeyes.“Youstillhavetodrivemetotheairport,soyou’re
notridofmeyet.”
Ismile,andwelookaroundthehouseonelasttime.Thenheadoutsidewhereweallloadupand
go our separate ways. As the other group leaves, Merritt and I sit in my car, so many emotions
runningthroughme.Firstofall,IhategoodbyesandeventhoughIonlywantedaweek,thethought
ofendingthingsherewithhimishard.Iplugmyphoneinandexhale.
Hetakeshishandandrestsitatopmykneereadingmewell,“Thankyouforeverything,Quinn.
I’mreallygonnamissyou.”
“Ofcourse.I’msorry,”Iapologizeastearsfillmyeyes.“Ijusthategoodbyes.”
“Thisdoesn’thavetobegoodbye,”hesays,andapartofmedoesn’twantthingstoend.It’snot
fairofmetoplacehiminthesamegroupasalloftheothermenI’vebeenwith.He’sdifferent;he’s
provedthattimeandtimeagain.Sowoulditbesobadtogivethingsashot?
Lookingintohissexyeyes,I’mremindedofallthethingshe’sdoneforme,fromsavingmy
life, to my bracelet, to cuddling in the world’s most uncomfortable tiny bed. To the hours on end,
we’djusttalk…aboutnothingandeverythingallatthesametime.
ButbeforeIcananswerhim,myphonechimesonandthefamiliarnoisedrawsmyeyestoit.
Tellyourboyfriendhebetterwatchhisfuckingmouthandmanupsayingwhatheemailedmetomy
face.Iblinkprocessingthetextasanother,andanotherchimecomesthrough.
“What’sthematter?”Merrittasksme.
ThefamiliarstomachchurningfeelingofbetrayalthatIhavegrowntoknowsogoddamnwell
rainsdownuponme.Howisthispossible?Whatdoesheevenmean?
“Quinn?”Merrittasksmeagainandthenithitsme.
I checked my email from his iPad when he was in the hospital with Ari. “Did you email my
fucking ex?” He shifts in his seat, visibly uncomfortable. “Did you?” I ask again, this time more
agitated.
“Idid,Isawtheemailhesenttoyouandhadto.”
JesusChrist,he’sjustlikeeveryothermanoutthere.AndjustwhenIwasbeginningtothinkthat
he was different, he’s not. I’m not even with him, and he’s already gone behind my back and done
somethingtohurtme.
“Whywouldn’tyouhavetoldme?”
“Thethingshesaidtoyouweresoawful.”
“Theyarejustwords.Itwasn’tyourplace;respondingiswhathewanted.It’sgivingintohim.I
evenblockedhisphonenumber,andhekeepsusingothernumberstocontactme.”
“That’swhyIcontactedhim—he’sabitchandneedstobeputinhisplace.”
“Youdon’tknowhim,Merritt;there’snoputtingthatmaninhisplace…trustme.”
“Icouldwithmyfist!”
“Butit’snotyourplace.Don’tyouseethat?ThisisjustanotherreasonwhyIneedtobesingle.I
don’tneedanyonemakingchoicesforme.”StartingmyJeep,Ipullawayfromthehouseandhead
towardstheairport.Idon’twanthimtomisshisflight.He’squietasIdrive.Idon’tthinkeitherofus
sawthingsendingthisway,whichisfunnybecausetherewasn’tsupposedtobeanythingbetweenus
tobeginwith.
Weknewattheendoftheweekourtimewouldendandthatisexactlywhatit’scomedownto.
Stoppingathisterminal,hereachesforthedoorhandle.Butdoesn’tgetout.Heleansoverthe
centerconsoleandcupsmycheek,hiswarmhandssosoothingagainstmyskin,butIfightthefeeling.
“Justsoyouknow,lastweekwasoneofthebestofmylife,andIwasonlytryingtohelpyouwiththe
email…Goodbye,Quinn.”
Hekissesmeonelasttimeandstupidly,Ilethim.Heignitessomanyemotionsinsidemybelly
andthenjustlikethat…he’sgone.
Thepainofwatchinghimwalkawayhurtssomuch.I’vegrowntolikeourtimetogethermore
thanI’drealized,andinaway…dependonhim.ButIremindmyselfthatwecan’tbetogether.He’s
gotabusylifeasdoI,neitherofushastimeforarelationship.
Sittinghere,IrealizejusthowlonelyofalifeIlead.Merritt’swordsthatlastweekwasoneof
thebestofhislifeisjusthowIfeel.AndeventhoughI’mmadashellathimandasmuchashesays
hewastryingtohelpmeandthoughtwhathewasdoingwasright…itwasn’t.Thetruthis,hedidn’t
tellme.Hejustsweptitundertherug.IfindsomepeaceinremindingmyselfofthatasIdrivehome.
Ifhecouldsoeasilybrushthataway,he’ddoitagainandagaininaheartbeat.Imadeadecision
tofocusonmyselfaftermyexbrokeupwithmeandthatisexactlywhatI’mgoingtokeepdoing.
***
“I’mhome,”ItellWillowassheanswersherphoneonthefirstring.
“Oh,good,wasthedriveokay?”
“Yeah,nottoomuchtraffic.”Openingthedoortomyquietcondo,everythingisasitwaswhen
Ileftit.“Youguysmakeithomeyet?”
“Almost, maybe another thirty minutes or so.” Willow and Ted live down south in Colorado
Springs,whichisaboutanhourfromme.
“All right, well, I’m gonna unpack and do some laundry before heading to my parents’ for
dinner.”
“Tellthemwesaidhi.”
“Iwill.I…Imightalsoshutmyphoneofftonight.”
“Why?”
“Myex,hekeepscallingandtextingme,Ineedabreakfromit.”
“Don’tdothat,Quinn.Putastoptoit.Callandhaveyourphonenumberchanged.”
“I’llthinkaboutit,Ipromise.Bye,babe.”
Ihangupmyphoneandthenpoweritdown.Ithinkit’scometothatpoint,whereIneedtojust
turnitoff.Andinallhonesty,Willowmightberight;Imightneedtochangethephonenumbertoo.
Evenifitisapainintheass,thecomfortofknowinghecan’tcallmewillbeworthitintheend.
Unzippingmysuitcase,IbegintosortthroughallmyclothessoIcanrunaloadofwashandI
noticethesashthatMerrittusedasablindfoldonmeistuckedtothesideofmybag.Slowly,Ipullit
outandwrittenacrossitinwhatlookslikethickblackmarkerishisphonenumber.Thememoriesof
ourtimetogetherallcomefloodingbacktome.God,wehadfun,somuchfun.Hewasamazingand
sexy and fulfilled so many desires inside me…but sadly I push them away…I have to…to protect
myself.
Tossingthesashonmybed,IletitgoandkeepmyheadonstraightasIthrowaloadoflaundry
inthewash,thenmaketheshorttriptomyparents’house.
Pullinguptoit,mymomisstandinginthedrivewaywithherhandsonherhips,whilemypoor
dadisonaladderstringingmoreholidaylightsalongtheguttersofthehouse.
“Wow,morelights?”
“Yeah,Ijustfeltlikeitneededthatlittleextraoomph,”mymomrespondsandgivesmeahug.
“It looks great. Hi, Daddy, be careful.” He curses under his breath, clearly frustrated to be
adding more lights to their already outrageous setup. You know those houses your parents would
alwaystakeyoutowhenyouwereakid,theoneswithlightsthatmusicwouldplayto?Well,that’smy
parents’house.Theygoallouteveryyearandhavenonstoptrafficdrivingbyfortheentiremonthof
December.
Asmydadcomesdowntheladder,hegivesmeahugandsaystomymom,“Isthatallyouwant
addedtotheroof?BecauseonceIputthisladderup,I’mdoneuntilJanuary.”
She laughs him off, not answering him, and it’s because she’ll want to add more or make a
changelikeshealwaysdoesandhe’llgripeandmoan,buthe’lldoit…forher.Wefollowmydadin
throughthegarageandthesecondweenterthehouse,thesmellofheramazingvegetableshepherd’s
pieinvadesmysenses.
“Imadeyourfavorite,”mymomsays.
“Icansmellit.”
“Sohowwasyourtripthisyear,dear?”Shealwayslovestohearaboutallofthethingswedo
andthegamesweplay,likeshe’svicariouslylivingthroughme.Mydadisalreadyloungedbackin
hisreclinerwatchingTVinthelivingroom.
“Itwasgood.Ihadtosharearoomwithaguy,sothatwasunexpected.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, he’s one of Ari’s friends. They used to work together.” My dad turns the TV up, still
hatingtohearmetalkaboutdatingormeninanyfashion.
“How’dthatgo?”
“Good,hewasniceand…”Itrailoff,whatamIeventryingtosay?AmIgoingtotellherthatI
likehim?WhywouldIdothatwhenwhatwehadwasonlyforaweek?Itwasaone-timething,and
nowwe’redone.
“Andwhat?”
“Ohnothing…hewasarealgentleman,heevenboughtmethis.”Ishowhermybraceletandher
eyesbeamtouchingthelocket.
“Oh,Quinn,it’sjustlikeyouroldone.”
“Itis.WefounditinastoreinSteamboat.”
“That’swhereyourdadandIgotyours.”
“Really?”
“Yes.Howniceofhimtobuyitforyou.”
“Well,Ididn’thavemywallet,andItriedtopayhimback,buthewouldn’tletme.”
“It’slovely,dear…reallylovely.”
Anditis.LookingathowhappymymomisthatI’vegotanewbraceletmakesmerealizethat
I’vegotMerritttothank.Andmaybe,Ineedherunbiasedopinionabouteverything.Sheisoneofmy
bestfriends.Itellhereverything,sosheknowsaboutmyexandwouldunderstandifItoldherabout
myandMerritt’sone-weekagreement.Shemightbeabletoshinesomeclarityonthings.
Chapter20
Merritt
It’sbeenaweeksinceIleftColorado,andIstillcan’tshakeQuinnfrommythoughts.IswearIthink
about her constantly. When I go to bed, she’s the last thing I think about, and as soon as I wake up,
she’sthefirstthingonmymind.Imissher.Imissholdingher,fuckingher,andjustbeingwithher.
I’ve never met a woman quite like her; she’s gorgeous and sweet, funny and sexy. She’s
everythingthatI’vebeenlookingfor,andunfortunately,she’semotionallyunavailable.
I’d hoped by now that she would’ve called or texted, as I left her my number…but still not a
singleword.“Mr.Smith,”myreceptionist,Suzy,chimesinthroughmyphone.
“Yes,ma’am.”
“Ihaveyourfatherforyou,onlinethree.”
“Thanks.”
Looking at the button, I contemplate not even answering it. My dad has been a real piece of
worksinceIgotback.“Hey,Dad,”Ireluctantlyanswer.
“Dammit, Merritt, why didn’t you tell me that the Serranos weren’t renewing their lease with
us?”TheSerranoFamilyisaprominentfarmingfamilyintheplainsofColoradowholeaseusover
fiftyacresofoil-producingland.
“Idid.IemailedyouaboutitbeforeIwenttoColorado.”
“No,youdidn’t.AndnowIhavetohearaboutitfromthatlittleprickofafriendofyourswho
betrayedusthathegottheirlease.YouknowhowIfeelaboutgivingArianyofourbusiness.”
“I’llfindtheemailandforwardittoyouagain,butItoldyou.”
“What’sitmatternow?They’regone.”
“Hereitis,yourexactwordswere,‘Fuck,them.Wedon’tneedtheirpiddlyfiftyacres.’SoIlet
itgo.”
“Well,youshouldn’thave.YouknowhowIcanoverreactsometimes.”
Understatementofthefuckingyear.
Pinching the bridge of my nose, I’m so aggravated. I get distracted as a new email comes
through.
“Didyoufuckinghearme?”
“No,I’msorrysomeonecameintomyoffice,”Ilie.
“IwantyoutogettheSerranosback.Understand?”hebarksatmeandhangsup.Ofcoursehe
does.It’sallmindgameswhenitcomestomydad.SoIdialAri’snumbertoevenseeifhesignedthe
dealforrealornot.
“Whatup,bitch?”heanswers,obviouslyfeelingbetterandbacktohisoldself.
“Oh,youknow,I’vejustgotmyfatherupmyass.”
“Tellmeaboutit;he’sfuckin’nuts.”
“IfIdidn’tknowbetter,I’dthinkheneededtobecommitted.”Helaughsatmycomment,andso
doI.Myfatherisalwaysthebruntofourjokes,thoughI’dneversayanyofthesethingstohisface.
“Sowhat’sup,man?YoubeentalkingtoQuinn?”
“Nah,shehasn’tcalledme.”
“Really?Mustbebusy.I’llshootyouhercontactinfo.”
“Thanks,brother.SodidyoureallysigntheSerranos?”
“Hellyeah,Idid.”
Dammit.
“Whatwoulditcostmetogetthemback?”
“Areyoukiddingme?”
“No,unfortunately,I’mnot.Hewantsthemback.”
“Fuck,man!Doeshewantthemback,ordoeshejustnotwantustohavethem?”
“What’sthedifference?”
“There’sabigdifference.Whenareyougonnalethimstopmakingdecisionsforyou?”
“Don’tevenstart,I’vehadituptomyneckwithhim,butyouknowmyhandsaretied.”
“Youbetterfuckingpaymesowellwhenyouownthecompany.”
“YouknowIwill,you’vealreadygotarunningtab.”
“Letmeseehowfaralongthepaperworkis,andI’llgetbacktoyou.”
“Thanks, man.” Ari and I hang up and right away his email comes through. Reading Quinn’s
contactinfo,Ihavetoreachouttoher.Imissher,andIwanttoknowifsheisreallydonewithme.
Wasittrulyaone-weekthingandnothingmore?
Anxiously, I go into my personal email and begin to type her a message, but the words just
won’tcomeoutright.
AsIreadtheemailagain,Itrytonotsecond-guessmyselfbeforehittingsend.
To:
From:
November14,2016,6:05pm
Quinn,
Ihopeyou’redoinggood.Imissyou.Youshouldcallmesometime.
361-555-1789.
Merritt
Chapter21
Quinn
Touchingmybracelet,Ican’tshakeMerrittfrommymind.IgothisemailasIleftwork,andIdon’t
know what to do. It’s been a week, and I’ve tried my hardest to push him as far out of my head as
possible,butmymindisstillconsumedwiththetimewesharedtogether.Mymomevenagreedthat
rightnow,Ineedtofocusonmyself…butIjustcan’tseemtodothat.
Forsomereason,he’sgotthisholdovermethatmakesmewanttobewithhimsobad.
Asmuchfunaswehadtogether,though,it’llneverbemorethanthatweekinthemountains.As
Iplaywithmybracelet,theboxpopsopen.Istillhaven’tputawishinside.Ineedto—thatisthepoint
ofthese.
AsIcloseit,Ineedtoshakehimfrommymind.He’sallI’vethoughtaboutforthebetterpartof
thislastweek.EventhoughI’mstillpissedathimforemailingmyex.
ThedoorbellringsandIgetuptoanswerthetakeoutdeliverythatIordered.
“Thankyou,”Itelltheguy,passinghimatwenty-dollarbill.
Sittingbackdownwithmybagoffood,Merritt’semailtauntsme,stillilluminatedonthescreen
ofmylaptop.IknowhelovesChinese,weordereditonenightfordinner,andheatesomuchitwas
reallydisturbing.Grabbingmyphone,Isnapapictureofthebagoffoodanddecidetotextittohim.
What’stheharminthat?There’snothingwrongwithmereachingouttoafriend,right?
Iorderedenoughforevenyou,wannajoinme?
Ihesitatesendingthetextanddecideagainstit.I’vejustgottastopthis,andasIgotodeletethe
message,Iaccidentlyhitsend.
Shit!
It’snotbuthalfaminutelater,andmyphoneisringing.Iglanceatthescreen,andsureenough,
it’shim.Iletitringforwhatfeelslikeadozentimes,myheartpounding,somanyemotionsreeling
throughme.Andthen…finally,Ianswer.“Hello?”MyvoicerattlesandIclearmythroat.
“Hi,” his voice so deep. Reminding me of when he’d whisper into my ear, making my pussy
twitch,andIlooktotheceilingwonderinghowhecanhavethispoweroverme.
“Yougotmyemail?”
“Idid.”
“Whatdidyouorderme?”heasks.
Openingthebag,Itakeeverythingout.“Let’ssee…Ihaveeggdropsoup.”
“Myfavorite.”
“Friedriceandaspringroll.”
“ShouldIbookmyflightnow?”
Igiggleathiswords.Eventhoughhe’sjoking,Ican’thelpbutwishhewereserious.
“I’mgladyoureachedout,Quinn.”
“I’mgladyoudidtoo.DidWillowgiveyoumyemail?”
He’squietforasecondandthensays,“Uhhh,no.Arigaveittome.”
“Oh…Isee.Youjustcouldn’twaitformetocallyou,couldyou?”
“Ididn’thaveachoice—it’sbeenaweek,andyoudidn’tcallme.”
“Iwantedto,butyouknowwhyIhaven’t.”
“Why?”heasksmesocalmly,makingmesaythereasonoutloud.
“Becausethingswithuswereonlyforthatoneweek.”
“But they don’t need to be.” I find myself contemplating his words, with my feet huddled
beneathme,notwantingtoeatordoanythingelsebutgetlostwithhim.
“Theydo,andyouknowwhy.”
“Idon’thavetoagreewithit,though.”
“Iguessyoudon’t,butmyexgotsupercrazyafteryouremail,andIhavetosayI’mdonewith
menrightnow.”
“Thenbedonewithmen,allofthem.Butdon’tbedonewithme.”
“Merritt,please.”
“I’msorry,Quinn.I’mtryingtorespectyouandbereasonablehere.”
“Thendon’tpushme.”
“Youtextedme,rememberthat.”Andhe’sright…Ididtexthim.AndIansweredwhenhecalled.
IfI’mgoingtobesoanti-menwhyamIeventalkingtohim?“CanIhelpatall?”heoffers,cuttingmy
mindfuckshort.
“No! No, thank you, you’ve done enough. It’s over with now. I’ve moved past it, got a new
phonenumber,andthatIthinkreallygotthroughtohimthistime.”
“I’msorryaboutemailinghimandnottellingyouaboutit;Ishouldn’thavedonethattoyou.”
“It’s all right; I get that you were only trying to help…but you don’t know my ex. He’s so
crazy.”
“Well,thankfullyIdon’t,andIdon’twantto,‘causeI’dprobablysendhimtothehospital.Could
westoptalkingabouthim?It’sreallygoodtohearyourvoice.”
“Sure,”Ilaughalittle,andheasksme,“So,how’syourdinner?”
“Ihaven’tstartedeatingyet.”
“Youshould.Idon’tmind,andyouknowIlovethesoundofyourmouth.”
“Stopit,Merritt.”
“Sorry,Iforgot,we’reonlyfriends.”Histoneisdown,andIchangethesubject.
“Howhaveyoubeen?How’sworkandbeingbackinTexas?”
“I’ve been okay. Work’s…work. It’s nice to be home right now. The weather is great, really
warm.”
“Yeah?Iwishitwerehere.It’scold,andwekeepgettingtonsofsnow.”
“You like the snow, though,” he tells me which I told him on vacation that I did. He always
listenstoeverythingIsay.
“I do, but it would be nice to have a warm day every so often. You can even go to the beach,
can’tyou?”
“Ican.Youshouldcomeandvisitme;you’dloveithere.”
“YouknowIcan’t,Merritt.”
“I’m sorry, I just miss you, Quinn, and I have a hard time thinking you aren’t feeling what I
am.”
Hiswordsbringmyworldtoahalt.I’veneverhadamanbesoopenandtalktomethewayhe
is.I’vehadguyswannaseeme,orwannagoout,orhookup.Butnoonehaseverputtheirfeelings
outtherethewayMerrittis,andIdon’tknowwhattosayorhowtorespond…
***
“You’requiet,”Eve,oneofmyco-workers,saysasIblanklygazeoutthewindowandlookat
allthepeoplebustlingbyon16
th
Street.
“Sorry.I’vejustgotalotonmymind.”
“Isitwork?CanIhelpwithanyofyouraccounts?”
“No,I’mfinallycaughtupfrommyvacation.”
“Speakingof,howwasit?You’vebarelymentionedawordaboutit.”
“Isyoursaladokay,ma’am?”thewaiterasksme.
“Yeah,it’sgood.CouldIhaveaboxandwe’lltakethecheck?”
“Is one check good?” he asks, looking me up and down. He’s cute, but his appraisal does
nothingtome,notthewayMerritt’scouldbringmetomykneeswithasimplesmirk.
“That’sfine.”
“Ooh,helikesyou,”Evesays,“Youshouldgethisnumber.”
Irollmyeyes,“He’snotmytype—he’sscrawny.Ineedmuscles,somethingtoholdonto.”
“Igetthat,girl.Sotellmeaboutthetrip.”Ifillherinonallthedetailsaswepayourcheckand
box up our to-go food. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me about him sooner,” she scolds me as we
makeitbackintoourbuilding.
Thewarmthissoinviting.“There’snotmuchtotell,itwasjustaweek,andnowit’soverwith.”
“Quinn,youdon’tbelievethat,doyou?”
WewaitatthebottomoftheelevatorbanksforacartoarriveandIlookherdirectlyintheeye.
“OfcourseIdo.”
Asweshuffleinside,everyonecallsouttheirfloors,andthisisoneofthethingsthatdrivesme
crazy.Whycan’tpeoplejustpushtheirnumberwhentheywalkin?EvesnickersatmeasIpushyet
anothernumber.Thenrightasthedoorsclose,someonecallsout,“Holdthat,wouldya?”
Iignorethem,butthepersonontheothersidepushesthedooropenbutton.
Seriously?Thestairswould’vebeenfaster.
And as I look up, my heart skips a beat. Dressed in a sexy ass suit with the most gorgeous
expression ever is Merritt, and his gaze is eating me alive. He squeezes in, placing his body right
alongthefrontofmineashepressesthebuttonforhisfloor,glancingbehindhim.
“Hey,”hesays,leaningdownandkissingmeonthecheek.IcansenseEve’seyesalloverus,
andIswallowsearchingformyvoice.“Hi.”SuddenlyI’mshy,buthe’snot.Everythingabouthimis
consuming me and when he takes my hand in his, holding it tightly, the comfort I felt for the week
whenweweretogethercomesrushingbacktome.I’vemissedhimmorethanIrealized.
The elevator doors open at its first stop and a few people shuffle out giving us a little more
room,butMerrittdoesn’tgivemeanymorespace.“Whatareyoudoinghere?”Iaskhim,knowing
weonlyhavealittlewhilelongertogether.
“IhaveameetingwithaclientthatAriistryingtostealfromme.”
Ofcourse,heis.
“Didn’tyougetmytexts?”heasks.
“Ihaven’tcheckedmyphoneallday.”
“Checkit.”Hecupsmycheekandtouchesmylipswiththisthumb.Ileanintohishand,getting
soeasilylostinhimthateverythingelsefadesaway.It’sasifwearestandingalone…justheandI.
The elevator dings and Eve calls me to follow her as she waits on our floor. “Room 503,” Merritt
says,passingmewhatlookslikeahotelkeycard,andIstepbackwards,notresponding,butoureyes
staylockedtogether.Helickshisbottomlipasthedoorsclose,andI’minsuchadaze.“Whatthehell
wasthat?”Eveshrieks.
“That’shim,theguyfromtheweekIspentinthemountains.”
“YousaidhelivedinTexas.”
“Hedoes,he’shereonbusiness.”
“Youalsosaiditwasaone-timething,sowhatwasthat?”
“Ihavenoclue.”Ilookdownatthekeycardinmyhand.Thenameacrossitreads,“TheBrown
Palace,”whichisonlylikethenicestandoldesthotelinthecity.Evesnatchesitfrommeandasks,
“Whatareyougonnado?
Lookingtoherforadvice,Irespond,“Ihavenoidea.”
Shegivesmebackthecardandlookslikesheisabouttopeeherpants.“Hi,Mr.Johnson,”Isay
aswepassoneoftheseniorVP’s.
“OhmyGod,Quinn.Areyougoing?”
“No!”Itellheraswesitdown.Sheglaresatme.“Idon’tknow,maybe.”Takingoutmyphone,I
checkit,andyep,thereisonemissedcallandtwomissedtextmessagesfromhim.
ImightbecomingtoColoradoforbusinesstoday,couldIseeyou?
Headingtotheairportnow…dinner?
Ifindithardtobelievethathesuddenlyhasbusinesshere.Whenwetalkedlastnight,hedidn’t
mentionathingaboutit.Hejustkepttryingtopushmetoadmittowantingmorewithhim,andwhenI
didn’t,nowthismorninghemightbecominghere.ThenwhenIdon’trespond,he’shere?Heknows
I’mnotinanyplacetodateorbewithhim.
Takingthekey,Itossitintomytrashcan.WhyshouldIgo,becausehesaidso?I’mdonebeing
toldwhattodo,asmuchasithurtstopushhimaway,I’vegottalookoutformyself,nooneelsewill.
DialingWillow,herphonegoestovoicemail,andIrememberthatsheisinclassalldaytoday.
Hangingupwithoutleavingheramessage,IcallAri.Somethingseemsoffaboutallofthis.Merritt
could’veplannedthisallalong,andIhavetofindoutifhe’slyingaboutthingsorifthisisreallya
coincidence.
“What’sup,Quinn?”
“DidyoutellMerrittwhereIwork?”
“No,why?”
“Because I just ran into him in my building, and he claims he has business here. Something
aboutgettingaclientbackyou’retryingtosteal?”
“Oh,theSerranoFamily.Theirattorney’sofficeisinyourbuilding.RememberwhenItexted
youforlunchtheotherday?Iwastheretoclosethedeal;nowhe’stryingtogetitback‘causehisold
manisafuckingkook.”
“Areyoubeingserious?”
“Yeah,whywouldIlie?”He’sright…whywouldhelie?“Hey,ifitmeansanything,Quinn,he’s
areallygoodguy.”
IhangupwithArianddon’tknowwhattodo.Isthisallmejustmakingthisshitupinmyhead?
AmIbeingparanoidbecauseofmypast?DoIletmyguarddownandjustwanderovertoTheBrown
Palaceandstripnakedbecausethat’swhatMerrittwantsandArisayshe’sagoodguy?
Workgetsthebestofme,andI’mthankfultokeepmymindbusy.Asthedayfliesby,Idon’t
know where the time has gone. Everyone around me is packing up to leave, and I feel like even
thoughI’vebeenswamped,I’vegottennothingaccomplished.MinusmakingalistofreasonswhyI
needtostaysinglethatissolongIcouldmakeabookoutofit.
“Night,”Evesays,thankfullynotaskingmeifI’mgoingtoseeMerrittagainornotandIsmile,
finishingthespreadsheetI’mworkingon.
Myphonebuzzesinmydesk,andasIglanceinside,IseeaviewofDowntownDenver.Theonly
thingthatwouldmakethisviewbetterisyou.Room503…I’mwaiting.
Islammydeskdrawerandpinchthebridgeofmynose.Whyisthishappening?Howcouldhe
be here and expect me to just drop things and run to him? He knows how I feel, we agreed to one
weekandnowhe’spushingme.Lookingatthepictureagain,Ibegintodigthroughmytrashcanand
getstartledbymyboss.“What’dyoulose?”heasks,andIshootstraightupinmychair.
“Oh…nothing,justapaper.Idon’twanttore-pullthedocsandsearchthroughthemtoreprint
it.”
“Ahh,okay.Well,Ineedafavor.WejustgotthesigneddocumentsinfortheTorrezaccounts.
They’ll be here Monday morning, and I hate to ask you, but if you could work on everything this
weekend,I’doweyou.”
“Stan,youalreadyoweme,”Itellhim.
“I do, and I’m sorry I haven’t paid you back from the last time I asked you to work on the
weekend.Youcanevendothisfromhomeifyouwant.AndI’llgiveyoumyticketstotheNuggets
gamethisweekendtoo.Willthathelp?”
“Ifyouhavethemonyounow,thenmaybe.”Hereachesintohisbackpocketandpullsouttwo
tickets.Butbeforeheletsgoofthemheasks,“You’llgeteverything,includingtheaccounts,allsetup
byMondaymorning?”
“Surewill,”Itellhim.
“Thankyou,Quinn…you’realifesaver.”Hewalksoff,leavingmewithasweetpairoffloor
seatstotheNuggetsgametomorrownight.
Withmytrashcanstillbetweenmylegs,Ilookinandspotthecardrightaway.Takingitout,I
tossitinmypurseandgrabmylaptopandotherthingsIneedtogetmyweekendworkdone,takingit
allwithmeasIleave.
Walking home, my phone rings; it’s Merritt. I’m reluctant to answer; my brain is so jumbled
rightnowbutlikeusual…Ican’tresisthim.“Hello?”
“Areyoucomingoverhereornot?”
“No,”Itellhim,waitingtocrossastreet.
“Whynot?”
“I’mspent,it’sbeenonehellofaweekback,andmybossjustgavemeevenmoreworkthatI
havetodoathomethisweekend.IthinkIjustwannagohomecrashandgetafreshstarttomorrow.”
“I’llcometoyou?I…Ijustwanttoholdyou.”
Hisofferissosweet,howcanIturnhimdown?Butthinkingaboutit,thetruthis,onceweare
alone,cuddlingwillbethelastthingwe’llbedoing.We’llfuckandprobablywon’tbeabletostop,
andwhatwillthatopenup?Ineedtothinkaboutthingsformyself,formyfuture,tomakesureIdo
what’sright…forme.
“Nottonight?”
“I’mleavinginthemorning.”
“Thentherewillbeanothertime,Merritt.”
Hedoesn’trespond,andIentermybuilding,keepingmyvoicedownasIaskhim,“Okay?”But
he’sstillquiet.Glancingatthescreentoseeifhe’sevenstillthere,he’snot.He’shunguponme.
What the fuck? Just because I need some time, he hangs up on me? How is that even fair? I
didn’taskhimtocomehere.
Chapter22
Merritt
Staringattheblankscreenofmyphone,I’maggravatedathowclosedoffQuinnisbeing.Idon’tget
whylastweekitwasperfectlyokayforustobetogetherandnowthisweekit’snot.Atthetimethat
weagreedtooneweek,Ithoughtaweekwouldbeenoughtoletmegetovermyfeelingsforher,but
itwasn't.Allitdidwasmakethemstronger.She’sgottabefeelingwhatIam;I’mnotcrazyafterall.
I’mtryingtorespectherandnotpushthings,butshewon’tevenseemetojustcuddle,andbeingthis
closetoher,yetsofaraway,isdrivingmefuckin’mad.
Refilling my glass of whiskey, my father calls me again, wanting to know if I closed the
Serranodeal.Fuckhim!Allhecaresaboutisbusiness.Hedoesn’tcareaboutmeorwhatI’vehadto
gothroughtogettheSerranosback.
Sittingonthecouchthatoverlookstheviewofthecity,itoccurstomethatI’veneverrealized
howbeautifulofacityDenveris.
“What’sup?”IanswerAri’scallonthefirstring.
“Oh,man,youbetterclosetheSerranodeal,oryouroldmanisgonnaloseit.”
“Howmuchyouthinkit’dcosttohireahitman?”Iaskhimjokingly.
Webothlaugh,andItellhim,“Inallseriousness,IthinkIsavedthedeal.They’regonnaanswer
meinthemorning.”
“Youmeanyoustoleitfromme?”
“Fuckyou;youstoleitfromme.”
Webothlaughandhesays,“SoIheardyousawQuinn.”
“Shecallyou?”
“Yup,allworkedupandshit.”
“Youshould’vewarnedmethatsheworkedinthatbuilding.”
“I’mbusy,man,Idon’thavetimetoworryaboutwhoworkswhereandcross-referenceitby
youroh-so-importantschedule.”
“Shutup,bitch!”
“Sodidyouhititagain,getinagoodnooner?”
“No,andnowshe’sbeingallbitchyaboutseeingme.”
“Who cares? She’s been hurt. You know how women are. Don’t give up on her…that’s what
she’sexpecting.”
Hanging up with Ari, I never imagined he could make so much sense. I dial Quinn’s number,
andsheanswers,“Didyouseriouslyhanguponme?”
“Noway,”Ilie.“Mycellphonedied,andIjustgotitturnedbackon.”
“Youreallydidn’thangup?”
“Nope.Sowhatareyouwearing?”
“Merritt!”shescoldsme.
Thealcoholurgesmeon,makingmeverybrave.Thisiswherewefirstconnected—sex.IfIcan
makeherseehowgoodwearetogether,eventhroughthephone,maybeIcanconvincehertogive
thingswithusashot.
“Igetthatyoudon’twanttoseeme.”
“It’snotthat.I’m…I’mscaredtobealonewithyou.Justbeingintheelevatortodaywasalot.”
“Doyoutrustme?”Iaskher,thesamewayIdidwhenIblindfoldedher.
“Yes,youknowIdo.”
“Good,nowgointoyourbedroomandtakeyourclothesoff.”
She doesn’t answer me, and I imagine her standing there stark naked, her soft white skin,
alluringandtempting.Wantingtobetouched.
“I’mnaked.”
Igetundressedmyselfandsaytoher,“Lookinthemirror.”
“Why?”
“Trustme.”
“‘Kay.”
“Doyouseethatfreckleonyourrightside,nexttoyourtit?”
“Yes.”
“Iwantyoutocloseyoureyesandimaginemylipsonit.”She’sbreathinghard,andIgrabmy
cock,knowingIcouldcomeatanymoment,butI’llwaitforher.
“Canyoufeelmylips?”
“Uhhuh.”
“Good,now,touchyourself.”
“OhGod,Merritt,”shemoans,andIhavetoletgoofmydick.Iclosemyeyes,listeningtoher
raggedbreathingandhopesheseeshowgoodwearetogether,howfuckingwellourbodiesreactto
oneanother ’s.
“Tellmewhatyou’redoing,”Icommandher.
“Touchingmyself.Ijustlaiddownonmybed.”
“Ibetyouwishmycockwasinsideyou,huh?”
“God,yes.”
“Mmm,keeppleasingyourself,baby.”
“Jesus,Iwannacome.Willyoucomewithme?”
“No…”Irespond,andshegetseerilyquiet.
“Whynot?”
“BecauseI’msavingitforthenexttimeI’minsideyoursweetcunt.Goodnight,Quinn.”
Chapter23
Quinn
Readingtheclockonmynightstandasitchangesfrom2:16amto2:17am,Ihaven’tfallenasleepyet.
All I have been doing is tossing and turning all night, my mind fighting with my body, the two
wantingcompletelydifferentthings.
AfterMerrittandImessedaroundearlierandheteasedmeandthenbasicallyleftmehanging
byathread,mybodyisajumbledmess.Ineedtoseehim,eventhoughIshouldn’t.Iwanthimone
moretime…butit’ssuchabadidea.
Shuttingmyeyes,IfightwithmybraintobequietandhopethistimeIcanfallasleep.ButallI
hearishisvoiceandthewayhecoaxedmeon.
Fuck, it seems hopeless, the clock still reads 2:17am. On my nightstand is the keycard for his
hotel.Ipickitup,spinningitaroundandaroundinmyfingers.Then,Idropitandgetup,hopingthat
maybeabathwilltiremeout.
Aftersoakingforwhatfeelslikeaneternity,itdoesn’thelpathing.Ifanything,Ifeelevenmore
awake. As I slip my sweat pants on, my clit is still twitching for him, and I’ve made my mind up. I
needtogotohim;Ineedtofigureoutthereasonforthisconstantpull.Maybeonelasttimetogether
willstopit.Slippingonmybootsandcoat,Ileave.
Idecidenottocallhim,whatisthepointofthat?Ihaveakeyafterall.Hell,maybehe’swith
someoneelselikeatypicaltravelingmanwouldbeandwalkinginonitwouldmakemebedonewith
himinaninstant.
Gettingintomycar,it’scoldandtakesafewminutestowarmup.Onthedrive,thereisliterally
nooneoutontheroads.
Thedriveisshort,andIparkmyJeeponthestreetoutsideofhishotel,thenmakeadashinside.
The old eclectic décor seems to span from floor to ceiling. I’ve never actually been inside of this
place. Looking for the elevators, I spot them, right as the desk clerk looks at me with a curious
expression.
I guess it could be because I am wearing sweatpants and pretty much look like a cute hobo. I
pressthecallbuttonandinstantlythedoorsopen.Takingthecaruptothefifthfloor,I’mremindedof
theinteractionthatMerrittandIhadintheelevatorearlierintheday.Hewassodomineering,theway
hekissedmeonthecheek,soclosetomylips,likeIwashis,andheldmyhandwhilehepressedhis
bodyrightalongmine,ignoringeveryoneelsesharingthespace.
The doors open to the fifth floor and my palms are sweaty, not really sure what I’m about to
walkinon.
Room503isattheendofthehall.AsIstandinfrontofit,Ilistenforanysoundsornoises,but
therearen’tany.Placingthekeyintothedoor,itflashesgreen,andIremoveit.
Iopenthedoorandlookaroundthedimhotelroom.TheTVisonsomeinfomercialwhichis
illuminatingMerritt’ssexy,nakedbody.
He’salone,justlikeIhopedhewouldbe.
Quietly,Iclosethedoorandlatchthelock,thentakemycoatandbootsoff,leavingthembythe
door.Walkingtothebed,Isitontheedgeofit,takingeverythingin.There’sahalf-drunkbottleof
whiskeynexttohimonthenightstand.Hemuststillbenakedfromwhenwemessedaroundearlieron
thephone.
Maybe this entire time, everything that I’ve been worrying about shouldn’t be a worry. Deep
down, I really don’t think he’s like other guys. He could have any girl in the world. Look at him:
perfectbody,gorgeousface,hugecock,andhewantsme.
Sittingthisclosetohimandnottouchinghimisdrivingmecrazy.Gettingup,Istripnaked,all
the while my eyes are on his dick. Then I hover over him, pressing his dick against my pussy as I
brushmyhairtothesideandleandownkissinghim.
“Youcame,”hesaysagainstmymouthandstretches,pushinghiscockagainstme.Hiseyesare
stillclosed,butheknowsit’sme.
Ikisshimagain,andheknotshisfingersintomyhairandflipsusover,histiredeyesfinally
waking. I relinquish all of my control, giving over to him, forgetting about all of my worries and
reservations.
“Tellmeyouwantme,”hebrusheshisnoseagainstmine.
“YoufuckingknowIdo.”
“Tellme,Quinn.”
“Iwantyou,Merritt.Iwantyouinsideme,Iwantyouto—”
“Likethis?”
Igaspashishardshaftfillsme.Hepushesmoreandmoreintome,buryinghimselfasdeepas
hecan.Withmylegsheldaroundhim,Iholdourbodiesclose,andneitherofusmoves.
Thethuddingofhisheartpulsatingthroughthetipofhisdickmakesmewanttocome.Iwiggle
myhips,andhebeginstopump,bothofusgettinglost…carriedawayinthemostamazinglyintense
orgasmsever.
That’s all it took was our connection, and we are dangling from a cloud of bliss, falling…
together.
MythroatistightasIsearchforair,andforthefirsttimewithhim,Idon’tholdback.Mynoises
aren’tquiet.Iwhineloudly,histhickshaftcominginsideofmeaswegiveovertothepleasure.
“Yes!Getloud,baby.”
Heslamsmypussy,oureyeslockedoneachother ’sashenowbraceshisweightaboveme.Our
pleasureends,butourbodiesstaytogether.Merrittisn’tinahurrytomove.Pullingthemessycovers
overus,hestaysnestledinsideofmeandasksme,“Pleasestaywithme.”
Itrailmyfingernailsupanddowntherigidmusclesofhisback,sleepalreadyinvadingmeand
Ifightit,notwantingtodriftoff.BecauseI’mremindeditwon’tbelonguntilourtimetogetherhas
to,yetagain,cometoanend.
Chapter24
Merritt
GettingdressedsoIcanheadtotheairport,Quinnisfastasleep,Ihatetowakeher,butIcan’tjust
leaveher.Lastnightwasamazing,andIdon’twanttogo,butifI’velearnedanythingwhenitcomes
todealingwithQuinn,it’stogiveherspace.
SittingontheedgeofthebedthewayIdidsoofteninSteamboat,Iwatchher.Sheawakesfrom
theweightofmybodyandyawns.“Whyareyoualldressed?”sheasks.
“Ihaveaflighttocatchinaboutanhour.”
“No,already?”
“Yes,Itoldyoumyflightleftearlytoday.”
“Don’tgo,”shebegsme,wrappingherarmsaroundmeandrestingherfaceonmythigh.
“Ihaveto,plusyouhaveworktodotoday,remember?”
“Icandoittomorrow.Pleasestay.”
“Why?”
“Because,it’sSaturdayandyoudon’thavetogointoworkuntilMondayand…oh,Ihavetickets
totheNuggetsgametonight.Comewithme—youlovebasketball.”
“Areyoubribingme?”Iaskher,andshenods,thenunzipsmypantsandtakesmycockout.The
feelingofherhandalonemakesmestiffasarock.
“Don’tdothat,”Itellher,knowingifshestartswithme,Iwon’tbeabletoleaveher.
“Stay,” she says and goes down on me. Leaning back, resting my weight on my forearms, I
watchhermouth,hersweetgoldmineofamouthstretchedsowideassheputsittogooduse.
Fireradiatesfrommyheadtomytoes.Isitstill,lettingherhaveallthecontrolandhopeifI
stay,thiscouldbethebeginningofus.
Mycumisclose,andIholdontoit,fightingthefeeling,notwantinghertoknowwhatshecan
dotomesoquickly.Thecontrolshehasovermeisunreal…butshepullsitoutofme.Takingmy
pleasureasifitwereherown.
Whenshepullshermouthaway,thefirstthingshesaystomeis,“Soyou’restaying?”
“Maybe,butifIdo,whatdoesitmeanforus?”Iaskher.
“Whatdoyouwantittomean?”
“Quinn,youknowIlikeyou,andIgetthatyou’vebeenthroughsomeshit,soIunderstandwhy
yourheartisguarded,butIwantyoutorealizeyoudon’thavetoguarditwithme.I’mnotgoingto
hurtyou…ever.”
“Iwanttobelieveyou.That’swhyI’mhere,andIwantyoutostaylonger.Idon’tknowwhatthe
future holds, hell…no one does, but what I do know is, if I keep guarding myself and living like I
have,thenImightpushawaythebestthingthat’severhappenedtome.I’msorry,Ijustfeellikemy
brainisallovertheplace.”
“It’sallright,justbehonestwithme.”
Shesmilesatmeandsays,“I’mscaredifyoustay,but…I’mevenmorescaredifyougo.”
“Then I’ll stay, and we’ll just spend the weekend together, okay?” I ask her, and she nods,
agreeing.“Good,willyouhandmemyphone,please?”
She gives it to me and walks off to the bathroom as I email my assistant, Suzy, asking her to
bookmealaterflight.
“So,you’retakingmetotheNuggetsgame?”Iaskherassheusestherestroom.
“Iam—courtsideseatstoo.”
“Wow,howdidyouscorethose?”
“Mybossowedmeforworkingonadealovertheweekend.”
“I’ll be sure to send a thank you myself. You hungry?” I ask her as she struts back into the
bedroom,starknaked.
“Icouldeat.”
“No,fuckthat.I’mnottakingyoursexyassout.I’mgonnamakeyoumysexslave.”
“Ahungrysexslaveisnotahappysexslave.”
“Okay,true.Soisthereanywherearoundheretoeat?”
“Yeah,thereareafewgoodplaces,butIonlyhavesweatstowearandyou…well,youhavethat
suit.”
“I love your sweats. Let’s go. Time is gonna fly by.” I smack her ass, and she scurries to get
dressed.Whensheisfinishedandlooksbackatmewearingathinlong-sleevedt-shirtandaredpair
ofsweatpants,Idon’tthinkI’veeverseenherlookmorebeautiful.
***
Afterbreakfast,westoppedbackbyQuinn’ssoshecouldshowerandchange.Ididn’tthinkshe
neededto,butIgetthatshewantedto.Sittingonhercouch,Iloveherplace—it’ssoperfectlyher.I
noticeastackofpaperworkthatmustbeforherwork,andIaskher,“Sowhatisitthatyouactually
doforaliving?”
“I manage people’s money. We invest in all sorts of things, from the safest of the safe to the
riskiestinvestments.Doyouhaveyourmoneywithafirm?”sheasksme.
“No,Ihaveitinthebank,withFDICinsurancecoveringit.”
“Youshouldlookintoyouroptionstoevenmakealittlereturnonwhatyouhavesittingthere.I
mean,Iwon’tdoit,notaftermylastexperience,butIcanreferyoutosomegoodcompanies.”
“What happened, like for real?” I ask her, really wanting to know how things went so wrong
withherex.
“Thestoryissocomplicated;I’mnotevensurewheretostart.”
“Thebeginning.”
“Uhhh,God,thisissoweirdtobetellingtoyou.Um,Imethimoutonenight,havingadrink
withco-workers.Attheendofthenight,wehookedup.Ileftmycardonthehotelnightstand,andhe
contactedmeforbusinesspurposes.Whenhecamein,Irealizedwhohewasandlongstoryshort,I
signedhimtomycompany.Fromthereitwasawhirlwindofaromance,untiloneday,hewasdone
withme.”
“So why did it end? Why was he done with you? He’d have to be crazy in my book to end
things.”
“Hejustbrokeitoff,outoftheblue,forreallynogoodreasonthatIcouldsee.Itmademefeel
like there was something wrong with me.” Tears fill her eyes, the pain of going back there evident
andIdon’twanttoseeherupset.“Ishould’veknownmeetinghimatabarthatitwouldn’tbeanything
long-term,butIfellforhim…likeIalwaysdo.”Pullingherintomyarms,Iholdherclose.“Well,I’m
happyitdidn’tworkoutbecauseitgaveusachance.”Shetensesinmyhold,andIcantellthatI’m
pushingthings,soIdropit.
Shedoesn’tsayanotherword,andIfearthatinthebackofhermind,shethinksIwillendup
feeling the same way. That I’ll hurt her like her ex did…but I wouldn’t. Because for me, there’s
nothingthatcouldmakemewanttoleaveherinthefirstplace…ever.
Chapter25
Quinn
“Doyoueverwishyou’dstuckwithbasketball?”IaskMerrittaswesitonthesideofthecourtbefore
thegamebegins.Theplayersareallpracticingshootinganddoingdrills.
“Nowthat’saloadedquestion.”
“Meaning?”
“Have you ever dreamt of doing something, but knew deep down it was too much of a long
shot?”
“I’llhavetothinkaboutthatone.”
Thenhesays,“Well,forme,thatwasbasketball.Itwasmylife-longdream.Ihadscoutsvisiting
meinhighschool,collegeswerelinedup,andIwasreadytotaketheleap.Dukehadofferedmea
fullride.Butattheendoftheday,Ihadachoicetomake,andmyfatherisverypersuasive.Hemade
ithardformetosaynotohim.”
“Butyouwantedtoplaybasketballmore,right?”
“Idid,butheofferedmemoremoneythanIwaslikelytogetintheNBA,andIdidn’thavethe
riskofgettingacareer-endinginjury.Healsopromisedmethecompanywhenheretires.”
“Butthatwasn’tyourdream?”
“No,itwasn’t.But,I’veadaptedandgrowntolovemywork.”
“Merritt, that’s like marrying the wrong person because your parents want you to. When you
know,it’swrong.Howcouldyoubetrulyhappy?”
“Now,now,Dr.Phil,let’snotgetcarriedaway—noone’sgettingmarried.”
He tosses his arm over my shoulder, and I lean into him, hating how terrible of a person his
fatherseemstobe.Whatkindofparentwouldtakeawaytheirchild’shopesanddreamsfortheirown
benefit?
“Youwantanotherbeer?”heasksmeasthebeervendorwalksby.
“Sure.”
He orders us two more, and the game begins. I love how into everything he is. Yelling and
screaming,abletocallfoulsandplayslikeacoachwould.Allthewhilehishandisbracingmythigh,
squeezingtighterandtighter,makingmypussywetandmybodysohorny.
It’sjusttoobadthathe’snotoneoftheplayers,‘causeheshouldbe.Icanseethepurelovefor
thegamethatlivesinsideofhim.Nomatterwhathisdaddoesorwhatcareerhechose,nothingwill
evertakethataway.
***
“Youowemeahundredbucks,”hetellsmeasweleavetheNuggetsgame.
“Youknow…IblameAriforthat;he’stheonewhomakesusalwaysbet.”
“YoucanblameJesusforallIcare,butyoushookonit,soyoustilloweme.”
“CanIpayitoffinsexualfavors?”
“Whatdoesonegetforahundreddollarsthesedays?”
“I don’t know; we can probably ask that girl.” And I point to a slutty looking woman on the
cornerofthestreetthatwecanseethroughthewindowsasweridetheescalatordown.Shelookslike
she’soutworking.
Bothofuslaughasweemergeintothechillywinternight.Walkingtomycar,Ican’tseemto
gettherefastenough,andMerrittisrightalongwithme,holdingmyhandtightly.“Fuckit’scold.”
“Yeah,itis.You’dloveTexas.Rightnow,it’smidsixtiesatnight.”
“God,I’dlovetofeelthat.”
“Comevisitmenextweekend?”
“No,Icouldn’t.”
“Sureyoucould.”
Hisoffer,asappealingasitis,shouldbeeasytoaccept.Wehavefuntogether,anditseemsI’m
thehappiestwhenI’mwithhim.Butitalsomakesmeworryaboutthings;Idon’twantustojumptoo
fast,toosoon.
StartingtheenginetomyJeep,Iturnonbothofourseatwarmers,andheasksme,“Soareyou
coming?”
“Letmelookandseewhenflightsare,andthenI’lldecide.”
“What’sitmatter?LeaveFridayandreturnSunday.I’llevenpayforit,”he’spushingmeandthe
offer,assweetasitis,makesmeworryit’llmakehimeventuallyresentme.Ithappenedwithmyex.
Heshoweredmewithgifts,somanyofthemIcouldn’tseestraight.Intheend,heuseditagainstme,
saidIwasonlywithhimforhismoney,whichisthefarthestthingfromthetruth.
“What’swrong?”heasksme.
“Nothing.”
“Don’tlie.Youcantellmeanything;youknowthat,right?”
“IknowIcan.”
Walkinginsidemyplace,hishandisaroundmine,andhe’sdroppedthesubjectofmegoingto
seehim…fornow.Ifliponafewlights,andhesaystome,“Youreallyhaveasickview.”
“Thanks,Ilovemyplace.”
WhileheobservesthesightsofdowntownDenver,Ipouruseachadrinkandthenstripnaked,
doingwhatMerrittandIdobest.
Walkinguptohim,Icanseehisreflectionintheglass.He’slostinhisownthoughts,andasI
standnexttohim,heslowlyturnshishead,asoftgrowlescapingfromhisthroat.
“Ohhh,youaresobad.”
“Youmakemewanttobebad,”Itellhimandhefinisheshisdrinkinonegulpandthenliftsme
into his arms and cradles my body against his as he storms into my room, kicking the door all the
wayopenandtossingmeonthebed.Ilaughfallingagainstthesoftfabricandwatchhimunbuttonhis
tight,navybluedressshirt.Thenhetakeshisbeltoffandsetsitonthebed,myheartbeatingfaster,
wonderingifhe’sgonnauseittospankme.
Takinghispantsoff,hismouthwatering,hugecockmakesmesowet,andheasksme,“Where’s
thesash?”
Ipointtomynightstanddrawer.Hepullsitout,thesoftmaterialrestingcomfortablyinthepalm
of his hand. “How convenient.” Then he scoots my body up on the bed and stretches my arms high
aboveme.
Takingthesash,heknotsitaroundoneoftheslatsinmyheadboardandthensecuresmywrist
totheotherendofit.Myeyesmovefrommyhandtohiseyesandheasksme,“Isthisokay?”Inod
quickly,neverhavingbeentiedupbefore,butneverwantingitmorethanIdowithhimrightnow.
Withmyotherhandfastenedinplacewiththebelt,hethentakesmebythehipsandpullsmeas
far down the bed as he can. My upper extremities are stretched to the max; I can’t move a single
muscle.Everythinginsideofmeisonoverdrive.MyheartisbeatingatMachspeed.Andhesaysto
me,“Ifyoucomevisitme,I’lltieyoutomybedfortheentireweekend,”andIhavetoask,“Whatare
yougoingtodotomenow?”
“Whatdoyouwant?”
“Iwantyoutofuckmeandcomehard.”
Hetakeshishandandbeginstorubitovermyclit.Iarchoffthebedfromthemeretouchofhis
fingersonme,andhesays,“Likethis?”
“That’sgood,butIreallywantyourcock.”
Hebeginstojerkhimself,andIlickmylips.
“Youwanttosuckme?”
“Please.” He hovers over me, holding on to the headboard and I open wide so he can stick
himselfallthewayintomymouth.Hepumpsinandoutofme,myhandsaretiedsoIcan’tmoveand
my lips stretched so wide that I can’t say a word. Our eyes stay connected, the way they always do.
“God,Iloveyourmouth,”hetellsmeandgrunts,movingevenfaster.
Mypussyistingling,readyandwillingtobeplayedwith.Butthisisn’taboutme,it’sabouthim.
Ashefucksmymouth,Iwaitforhiscum,butitdoesn’thappen.
Thenhestopsandslowlyremoveshimselffromme.Kneelingbetweenmylegs,Ispreadthem
wideasheconnectsourbodies.Mybodytensesfromthefullness;hisdickissohardasheshoves
intome.
Holdinghisbodyuponeithersideofmewithhisfistsballed,heasksme,“Whydoyoulikeit
slow?”
“‘CauseIdon’twantittoend,sotheslowerwego,thelongeritcanlast.”
“That’snottrue.”
“Whatdoyoumean?”Iaskhim,andhepullsmetowardshimbythehips,pushingintomeas
deepashecan.Igaspoutloud,asensationunlikeanyotherrunsthroughmeashiscockgrindssofar
intome.
“Letmeshowyou.Icanmakeyoucomeagainandagain,”hepromises.
Alittlehesitant,asI’veneverhadamanmakemecomemorethanonce,Inod,andhebeginsto
move. His hands have a strong hold on my body and every time he slams into me, I cry out in
pleasure.Mytitsbouncefromtheforceofhimslammingintome,hittingsuchasensitivespotinside
me,andashepicksupspeed,Ican’tcontrolmyself,lettinggoandcominghard.
Hecontrolsmybody,stillholdingontomeasherobsmeofmyfirstorgasm.Ibowoffthebed
inhisarms,fightingagainsttherestraints,searchingforsomefriction.However,Ican’tfindany,and
nowmypussyissosensitive,IfeellikeIcouldloseit,buthekeepsmoving.
“Stop,”Itellhim,justneedingaminuteandheshakeshishead,barrelingfaster.“Giveintoit,
Quinn,letgoagain.”
Diggingmyheelsintothemattress,Iloseallfocusonrealityasanotherblissfulorgasmruns
throughme.Iscreamloudly,shakingunderhiscontrolandthistimeIfigurehehastostop…butthat’s
notwhathedoes.
His eyes are carnal, his grunts are the loudest I’ve ever heard, and I look at him bewildered,
tryingtounderstandwhathe’sdoingtomybody.Thenhesaystome,“It’sokay,baby…letgoagain.”
Closingmyeyes,Itrustinhim.Zoninginonthenoisesintheroom…myandMerritt’smoans
alongwiththesoundofhisballsslappingmyass…pushesmecloseandasIfeelablastofwarmcum
fillme,ittipsmeover,andanotherorgasmtakesovermybody.Hegroans,digginghisfingersinto
mysides.
I don’t fight it or prepare for what is next. I give completely over to the orgasm, and as he
poundsme,hecomesagain,anditwon’tbelong,soonIwilltoo.Lookingintohiscleareyes,he’s
gotonehellofasmirkonhisface,andIsaytohim,“Whydidn’tyoudothatinSteamboat?”
“Becauseyousaidyoulikeditslow.”
He unties my hands, and I rub my wrists. “I thought I did. But had you done that, I might’ve
changemymindaboutendingthingsafteraweek.”
“Areyousayingyou’dstaywithmeformycock?”
“Maybe,”Ismirk,andhebeginstotickleme.
“You’resobad.DoesthatmeanIcanbookyourflight?”
Ithrashfromsidetoside,fightinghimtostop,buthedoesn’t.Thetruthis,Idon’twanthim
to…I never want him to stop. “Answer me,” he orders and the words roll off my tongue as if they
aren’tmyown,“Okay,I’llcome.”
Chapter26
Merritt
LyinginbednexttoQuinn,sheispeacefullyasleep.Itisbarelylightout,andIhopeIdon’twakeher,
butmyphonehasbeengoingoffnonstop.Mydadseemstobeonanewlevelofcraziness,nowthatI
decidedtostayinDenverforafewextradays.Hedoesn’tunderstandwhyandforsomereasonneeds
toknow.Hejustkeepssayingthatwehavesomuchworktodoandheneedsmebackattheoffice.
AsIrespondtohislasttext,Iwanttotellhimtogofuckhimself…butIdon’t.I’llbebacklater
ontonight;there’snothingthatcan’twaituntilthen.
He doesn’t respond and looking at Quinn, she is so beautiful. An email comes through from
Suzydistractingmefromwatchingher.ItcontainsQuinn’sflightinfoforFriday,andIcouldn’tbe
happierthatsheagreedtocomeandvisitme.Irespondtoherandsaythankyou,thenIforwarditto
Quinn.Ican’twaittohaveherinmybed.I’llmaketruetomypromiseandtieherthereallweekendif
shewants.
Just as the sun begins to pop up over the horizon, I set my phone down, wanting to make the
mostofmylastdaywithQuinn.Holdingherbodytightly,kissingthesoftskinofherneck,shewakes
slowlywithagrinonherface,andwhenshelooksatmelikethat,myheartmelts.
“Yousleepokay?”Iaskher.
“Yeah,thebest.”
“Good, baby,” I tell her and hold her body close to mine. She holds me back, her hands atop
mineaswewatchthesuncrestthemorningsky.
“Isthiswhatyougettowakeuptoeveryday?”
Rollingoverinmyarms,shesaystome,“Itis.”andshekissesme.Holdingontothebackof
herhead,Ikissherback.“Idon’twantyoutogo,”shetellsme.Hearinghersaythewords,letsme
knowthatweareheadeddowntherightpath,it’sjustgonnatakebabystepstogetthere.
“Idon’twanttoleave.”
“Skipworknextweekandstayherewithme.”
“Ha!IwishIcould,beautiful,butmydadisalreadythrowingatantrumwithmestayinghere
longer.”
“Screwyourdad.Hesoundslikearealasshole,youknowthat?”
“Oh,heis,buthe’stheonlyfatherIgot,andheholdsthekeytomyfuture.”
“Youshouldcallintowork,flyhomewithme,andletmetieyoutomybedallweek.I’dmake
youcomesomanytimes,you’dneverwanttoleave.”
“IfImissworkMonday,I’llgetfired.RememberthebribeItooksowecouldgototheNuggets
game?Istillhaveworktodo,andtheclientiscomingtomorrowmorning.”
“I guess neither of us can take the time off of work, so we’re just going to have to make the
mostoutoftheday.”
“Thatweare.Whatdoyouwanttodo?”
“Oh,that’suptoyou.Thisisyourcity.”
Sherollsmeontomybackandlaysherbodyalongmine.“Let’sstayinandfuck.”
“Okay,”Iagree,knowingthat’sallIreallywanttodoanyway.Wegetlostkissingoneanother,
thenaknockonherdoorstopsus.Shelooksatmewide-eyed,andIhavenocluewhattodo.
“Areyouexpectingsomeone?”Iaskher,andshescurriestogetdressed.
“No!”Sheshakesherheadandthenslamsthedoor,chargingoutoftheroom.Curioustosee
who’s here and a little worried it could be her crazy ex, I get dressed and then reach for the door
handle. A man’s voice stops me from proceeding, and I listen to his words. “You look fine, baby,
don’tbesilly.Doyouwantthisinhere?”
Rageconsumesme,andIyankopenthedoor,red-facedandonamissiontofuckupwhoeveris
callingher“baby.”
“You’re up,” she looks at me with a smile, and I ignore her, stalking towards the fridge. The
guyisbentoverlookinginsideofit,andbeforeIcangettohim,shejumpsinfrontofmeandsays,
“Merritt,thisismydad,Karl.Daddy,thisis,Merritt.”
Herdadturnsaround,clearlynotexpectinghertohavecompany,muchlessaman.He’sonthe
defensiverightawayasheglaresatme.Afterherlastbreakup,Iunderstand;hedoesn’twanttosee
herhurtagain.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir,” I say, changing my attitude, and extend my hand to him.
Reluctantlyheshakesit.
“Isthistheguyyoutoldyourmomabout?”heasksher.
“Yes,Daddy.Merrittisoneofthegoodones,though,sogoeasyonhim.”
“Ha!”helaughsfartooloudly,andI’malittleoffended.Hedoesn’tevenknowme.
“We’llseeaboutthat.Havedinnerwithustonight,wouldyou,son?”
“IwishIcould,sir,butI’mflyinghometoTexas.”
“Lunch,then?”
IglanceatQuinn,andshenods,soIagree.Herfathergivesherakissonthecheekandmea
sternlookasheleaveshercondo.“Wow!”Itakeaseatonthecouch,andshesitsnexttome.“AndI
thoughtmyoldmanwastough.”
“Stop it. He’s really very sweet; he’s just looking out for me. After my last breakup, I was a
mess,andheandmymomwerethereforme.”
“IguessifIhadadaughterandaguyfuckedwithher,I’dhateallmentoo.”
“See? So you get it. Now before we have to spend the day with my dad, will you fuck me
again?”
“You’reaneedylittlething,aren’tyou?”
Shenods, the cutestexpression across herface, and I lifther t-shirt overher head. “What are
yougonnadowithoutmethisweek?”
“Wecouldhavephonesex?”
Iliketheideaandthatshewantstotalktomeduringtheweek.ButIdon’tfocusonitforlongas
I have her with me, my hands on her body, her eyes locked on mine, and her control relinquished
over to me as I slide her panties down her sexy legs, loving her naked. And then I order her to do
whatIwant.
Chapter27
Quinn
“Wouldyoulikemoresalad,Merritt?”mymomasksasIwatchmydadstillglaringathim.
“No,thankyou,ma’am.”
“Whatisitthatyoudoagain,son?”
“I’mintheoilandgasindustry,sir.”
“Justlikethelastone,”hemuttersunderhisbreath.
“Excuseme?”Merrittsays.
“Dad, could I talk to you alone, please?” I finally ask him throwing my napkin down, so
aggravated with how he’s been treating Merritt. Heading down the hall, I storm into my parents’
office,andhefollows,closingthedoorbehindhim.“Whatisyourproblemwithhim?”
“Nothing,Idon’tevenknowhim.”
“Well, you’re sure acting like you do. You’d treat a homeless person on the street better than
you’retreatinghim.”
“Idon’tlikethewayhestaresatyou,Quinn.”
“Whatareyoutalkingabout,Dad?”
“Thelookinhiseyeisabitmuch.Youtwojustmet,right?Andit’sasifyou’reitforhim.”
“Then be happy for me, Dad, please? I’ve finally found a good guy. Don’t make this hard on
me.”
Mydadstepsclosertome,drawingmyeyestohisandsays,“Doyouhaveanyideahowhard
thatisforafathertodo?”
“Iunderstandthat,Dad.Justtry…forme…please.”
Hekissesmyforeheadandthenembracesmeinatighthug.AsIholdontohim,Ihopehecan
giveMerrittachance.Mydadcanbecoldandclosedoff,butheismyfatherafterall,andlikeMerritt
said,weonlygetone.
***
“Well,yourmomisgreat,butIofficiallythinkyourdadhatesme.”
“No,hedoesn’t.”IglanceathimasIdrivehimtotheairport,sosadthathistimeinDenverhas
alreadycometoanend.Ireallydon’twanthimtoleave.
“Whydidn’tyoutellmeyourexwasinoilandgas?”heasksme.
“Because it wasn’t my place to tell and he’s a client…so I have to protect his privacy at all
costs.”
“Evenagainstme?”
“Especially you, silly. If you find out who he is, I’m sure you’ll send a pipe bomb to his
doorstep.”
“Oohhh,that’sagoodidea.”
Glaringathim,heleansoverandkissesmycheek.
Herestshishandonmythigh,andIcanfeelmyselfalreadygettingemotionalaswenearthe
airport.“Canwenottalkabouthimanymore?”
“Ofcourse,babe.Ijustalwayswanttoprotectyou.”
“Iappreciatethat,Merritt,somuch.You’resogoodtome.”Lookingoverathim,Imisshim
already.“CanIwalkyouin?”Iaskhim.
“Ifyouwantto,sure.”
“Wecouldfindabathroomandhaveaquickie?”Iofferwithasmirkbutcanseeheisactually
considering it. Following the signs to the short-term parking, I take the first spot that I see. When I
turnthecaroff,thetearsprickthebackofmyeyes,andIfightthemtostop.Merrittisobliviousashe
kissesmyneck,suckingandnippingontheskinandgropingmybreasts.
Itryandfightbacktheemotions,butit’shard,andasobcreepsoutofme.
Alarmed,hepullsaway,lookingatmeandoncehecanseethatI’mvisiblyupset,heunlatches
myseatbeltandpullsmeoverandontohislap.Sittingcomfortablyinhishold,Istayinthismoment
foraslongasIcan.
“It’sonlyfourdays,andthenI’llseeyouFriday,”hetellsme,tryingtoreassureme.
“It’snotthat,”Isaytohim,chokingbackasob.
“Whatisitthen?”Hebrushesthehairoutofmyfacewaitingformetotellhim,andIhateto
admitwhatI’mfeeling,butheforcesmeto.“Tellme,please?”
“I’mjustscared.Thishasallbeensoperfect,andIworryitwon’tlast.”
“Whatdoyoumean?”
“Aguylikeyoucan’tpossiblybecontentlong-termwithagirllikeme.”
He’ssoconfused,lookingatmewithabewilderedexpressionacrosshisface.“Whywouldyou
thinkthat?”
Ishakemyhead,notwantingtoelaborateanyfurther.“Nevermind.”
“No,don’tbrushthisofflikethat,tellme.”
“It’smyowninsecuritiesgettingthebestofme,anditwasstupidofmetoletthemouttobegin
with.”
“Nothingyoueversayorfeelisstupid.Don’tyouunderstand?Talktome.”
Gazingintohissexyeyes,hecupsmycheekinthepalmofhishand,hisotherarmstillholding
me tightly. “You need to understand how perfect you are in my eyes. I’ll never hurt you; that’s a
promiseyouhavetoremember,okay?”
Listeningtohiswords,theyresonatedeepinsideofme.I’mnotsurewhyIbelievehim,butIdo.
“Thankyou.”
“Forwhat?”
“Forunderstandingmeandreassuringme.”
“Ofcourse.IwishIdidn’thavetogo.”
“It’sonlyforafewdays,”Isay,tryingtobelievethewordsmyself.AndI’mstunnedtorealize
how quickly I’ve gone from not wanting to see him, to dreading him leaving. Now to just make it
throughtheweek.
Chapter28
Merritt
“GoodjobgettingtheSerranosback,”mydadsays,poppinghisheadintomyoffice.He’sintownfor
afewdays,andIgotorespond,butbeforeIcan…he’sgone.Obviouslyinabighurry.
Checkingtheclock,Ihavetenminutesbeforemynextmeeting,andIhaven’ttalkedtoQuinnall
day.Wemissedeachotherthismorning,andIcan’tstopthinkingabouther.Grabbingmycellphone,
I get up and close my office door as I dial her number. Looking out at the water while the phone
rings,Iwishshewerelookingatitwithme.
“Hey,thisisQuinn,leavemeamessage.”
“HaveIevertoldyouthatyouhavethesexiestvoiceI’veeverheard?”Ismilethinkingaboutit.
“Anyways,Imighthavetokeepcallingyourvoicemailandjerkoff.Imissyou.Callmeback,sexy.”
Hangingup.Ilookdownatmyhardshaft.
Seriously?
Nowisnotthetime!“Mr.Smith,”Suzychimesinthroughmyphone.“Yourfouro’clockisin
theconferenceroom.”
Closingmyeyes,Igrabmysuitcoatandslideiton,butassoonasIdomyphonerings.Across
thescreenisQuinn’snameandIanswerit,notcaringthatIhaveclientswaitingforme.
“Hi,babe!”
“Hey.”She’squiet,andIworrysomethingiswrong.
“Everythinggood?”
“Yeah,I’mjustinthebathroomatwork.”
“Areyounow?”Mycockstiffensallthewayimaginingheraloneinabathroomstall.“What
areyouwearing?”
“Atightbluedress.”
“Sendmeapicture,”Iaskherandbegintorubmydickthroughmypants.
Onecomesthrough;damn,sheisabsolutelybreathtaking.“God,IwishIwastheretofuckyou.”
“Metoo.”
“Touchyourself,”Itellherandamrewardedwithhersweetsoftmoans.
“Mr.Smith,I’msorrytobotheryouagain,butyourfatherisrequestingyoubeginthemeeting,”
Suzychimesinthroughthephonesystem.
“It’snotevenfouryet,”IbarkatSuzy.
“I’msorry,sir.”
“TellhimI’llbethereatfour.”Glancingatmycomputer,it’s3:58.QuinnandIwon’thavetime
tomessaroundnow.
“Youhavetogo?”sheasksme.
“I do, I have a meeting. But I’m going to have my assistant give you access to my calendar.
She’llsendyouthelinkandtellyouhowtolookatthescheduleandseewhereIam,thiswaymaybe
wewon’tmisseachothersomuch,okay?”
“Okay,”sheagrees,andIaskher,“Whattimewillyoubehometonight?”
“Aroundsix.”
“Okay,I’llcallyouthen;makesureyou’renaked.”
ShegigglesandIhatetoendourcall,butIhaveto.“Maybejustonemorepicture?”Iaskher,
andshesaystome,“Bye,Merritt.”AndhangsupasIwatchthescreenturnblack.ThenIheadintothe
conferenceroom,thankfulthatmycockisn’thardanymore.Walkingin,myfatherhasalreadybegun
themeeting.
Fuckingprick!
Likehereallycaresaboutpunctuality.Hedoesn’tmakeittohalfofthemeetingshe’sscheduled
to attend. Shaking the clients’ hands, I sit down, and my dad just keeps yapping away, reading off
whateveragendawasemailedtohim.Idoubtheevenknowsmuchaboutthedeal.
MyphonebuzzesandIcan’tstopmyselffrompullingitout.Onthescreenisanotherpictureof
Quinn.Inthisoneshe’sblowingmeakiss,herhugetitsarestrainingthetightconfinesofherdress,
andI’mtemptedtoflytheretonight,surpriseher,andfuckherallnight.Thenleaveonthefirstflight
outofDenverintimetoreturnhereforanotherdayatthegoodol’job.
“Ifthere’ssomethingmorepressing,youneedtoattendto,Merritt,byallmeans,pleasedoso.”
Peevedatmyfatherforcallingmeoutinfrontofpotentialclients,Isay,“Thanks,we’vegota
hiccupwiththeSerranodeal.IthinkI’llhavetoflyintoDenvertohandleit.”
Apologizing to the clients, I leave and tell Suzy to book me the first flight out of here into
Denver. “Right away, sir.” She’s quick to respond, and I head into my office, making sure I’ve got
everythingcoveredfortherestoftheday.Sittingatmydesk,anotherpicturecomesthrough.Christ,
thiswomaniskillingme.
Textingherback,Itellher,Youbetterstopwiththesepictures,orI’mgonnabookaflightout
thereandtakeyouhostage.
Anotherpicturecomesthrough,thisoneisofhercleavage,andSuzychimesin.“Mr.Smith?”
“Yes,ma’am.”
“I can get you out on a red-eye tonight leaving here at 12:37am, when would you like to
return?”
“Isthatthesoonestthatyoucanfindforthedeparture?”
“Itis.WithThanksgivingcomingup,itseemslikeeveryoneisalreadymakingtravelplans.”
“Shit,”Imutterundermybreathandmydadbargesinmyoffice.“Letmegetbacktoyou,”Itell
her.
“HowcomeIwasnotawarethattherewasaproblemwiththeSerranodeal?”
“Itjustcameup,rightbeforethemeeting.That’swhyIwaslate.”EventhoughIwasn’tactually
lateandthereisnoproblemwiththeSerranodeal.Givinghimareasonfornotbeingtherewhenhe
wantedmewillmakehimhappy.
“Canyoufixit?”
“OfcourseIcan.”
“Good.”
Hewalksoff;myphonefloodedwithatonofpicturesfromQuinn,andSuzyislookingatme
fromherdeskacrossthebuildingwantingtoknowifIwanttheflightbookedornot.Fuck,thisisall
somuchtohandle.I’mnotsurewhattodo.ShouldIgotoDenver,whenIwon’tevengettoherhouse
untilatleastthreeinthemorning?OrshouldIwaitforhertocomeherethisweekend?
Chapter29
Quinn
It’s6:15pmandmyphoneringsagain.IhurrytofinishupsoIcanleaveandtalktoMerritt.Idon’t
dare answer it now; ‘cause he’ll distract me and make me blush a shade of red I really don’t want
anyoneheretosee.
“Night,Quinn,”mybosssayswalkingout.
“Night,”Itellhimandpackupmybag.Merrittcallsmeagain,andIfinallyanswerit,walking
out.
“It’s6:16,mydickisnothappywithyourightnow.”Igiggleandtellhim,“Hellotoyoutoo.”
“Don’tbeallniceandproper,thisisn’taboutafriendlyexchangeofwords;thisisaboutsex,
baby.”
Theelevatordingsasitarrivesonmyfloorandhesaystomeinanaggravatedtone,“Areyou
stillatwork?”
“Maybe.” I push the lobby button and begin my ride down. He goes quiet and then my phone
buzzeswithatext.Ilookatthescreenandseehesentmeapicture.
OpeningitupasIwalkoutintothebitter,coldnight,Igaspatthesightofhisrockharddick,
beingclenchedinthepalmofhishand.
“Merritt?”Iscoldhim.
“What?Wehadadate,andyou’relate.Soyoubetterwalkhomesuperfuckingfast.”
“Iam.”
“Butbesafe,beautiful.”
Ismilelovinghowhe’salwayslookingoutforme.“Imissyou,”Itellhim.
“Metoo.Howwasyourday?”
“Busy,butitflewbyandkeptmymindoffyou.”
“IwishIcouldsaythesame.Icouldn’tshakeyoufrommythoughtsandthenthosepictures.”
“Sorry,Igotalittlecarriedaway.”
“No,don’tapologize.Ilovethem.You’resogorgeous,youknowthat?”
Walkingintomybuilding,Ihavethebiggestgrinonmyface.Healwayssaystherightthings.
“Thankyouforsayingthat.”
“It’sthetruth.”
“God,IwishIwastheretofuckyou.”
“Iwishthattoo.”Openingthedoortomycondo,Ican’thelpbutfeellikemaybehe’slyingand
he’shere.HedidsaythatifIdidn’tstopwiththepictureshewasgonnaflyouthere,soitmighthave
spurredmetosnapatonofthemandfloodhisphonealldaywiththem.
Butlookingaround,myplaceisdarkandquiet.Closingthedoor,Ipressmybacktoit,tears
suddenlyprickingthebacksofmyeyes.“Youhomeyet?”
“Yeah,Ijustwalkedin.”
“Good!Getnakedandtextmeapic.”
Letting my coat and bag fall to the floor, I step out of my shoes and don’t know why I’m
suddenlysodamnemotional.
“Jesus,I’mhardforyou.”KeepingmyemotionsincheckbecauseIdon’twanthimtothinkI’m
crazy,Istripnaked.“Whereareyou?”heasksme.
“Inthelivingroom.You?”
“I’minmybed,imaginingyoursoftlipsaroundtheheadofmycock.”
Closing my eyes, I imagine that I’m there too. I can feel him inside my mouth; his hardness
makes me so wet. Dragging my hand down my body, I spread open my pussy lips and gently rub
smallcirclesovermyclit.
“God,youtastegood,”Itellhim.
“Youlikemestuffingyourmouthfull?”
“Uhhuh.”
“Areyoutouchingyourself?”
“Iam.”
“Sendmeapicture.”
Isnaponeofmybodyandsendittohim.Hegroanswhenitcomesthrough.“Fingeryourself
andimagineI’minsideyou.”
“Keeptalking.”
“I’mgoingtofuckyou,okay?”
“Yes,”Ipant.
“CanyoufeeltheheadofmydickasIrubitalloveryoursloppypussy?”
“Uhhuh.”
“Doyouwantmeinsideyou?”
“Please,Iwantyouinsidemenow.”
“I’mgonnagoslowsoyoucanfeeleveryinchofme,okay?”
AndwiththosewordsIsinktwofingersinsideofmyself,moaningfromthefullness.“That’sit,
takeallofmelikeagoodgirl.”
“Fuck,”Icryout,fingeringmyselfinawayIneverhavebefore.
“You’redirty,aren’tyou?”heasksme.
“Iam.”
“Youlikebeingfucked?”
“Uhhuh.”
“Good,nowslipyourpinkyintoyourass.I’mgonnafuckithardthisweekend.”
Istopforamoment,neverhavinghadanalsexbefore,butMerritthasmesohornyrightnow
thatIlistentohimandasIusemypinky,asensationreverberatesfromdeepwithinmybody.“Oh,
God,”Icryout,strokingmyselfandhesaystome,“Areyouclose?”
“Yes.”
“Good,nowgofasterandcomehard.”
My body is smashed down into my couch; my legs spread wide, and my fingers have me so
closetolettinggo,butIfightit,thesensationofteeteringontheedgeissogood.
Then he grunts fiercely, obviously coming and that’s my undoing. I shake from head to toe,
screamingformercy,forhimtostop,togivemeabreak.“Yes,baby,letgo,”heordersme,andonce
mybodysettles,Irealizeitwasmeallalong.Hissmoothvoicecoaxedmeon,butIwasincontrol
andcould’vestopped.Removingmyfingersfrominsidemyself,Iscootupandpullablanketfrom
overthebackofthecouchandcoverupmynakedbody.
“God,thatwasgood.You’resosexy.”
“Itwas.Thankyou.”
“Ofcourse.Soyougonnaletmefuckyourassthisweekend?”
“Maybe.Willithurt?”
“Well,that’suptoyou.Ifyoutryhardenough,youcanalwaysfindpleasureinthepain.”
“Woulditmakeyouhappy?”
“Itwould.Iwanttohaveyouineverywayimaginable.”
Hisstatementechoesdeepwithinme.Ilovetherawhonestythathealwaysshareswithme.He’s
nevertriedtohideit,andIadmirethat.
Chapter30
Merritt
AstheplanemakesitdescentintoDenver,I’manxioustogettoQuinn.It’sdarkashellout,andIcan’t
waittosurpriseher,tosneakintoherapartmentandslideintoherbed.Ijustwanttofuckherallnight
long.
“Flightattendants,pleaseprepareforlanding,”thepilotsaysovertheintercom,andIclosemy
eyes,lovinghowI’malwaysrewardedwiththememoriesofher.
As the plane gets lower and lower to the ground, the pressure changes and I have to keep
poppingmyears.Butsomethinggoeswrong;thepressuredropscompletely,andtheoxygenbagsfall
fromtheceiling.Thepassengersallbegintopanic,screamingandtremblingtogettheirmaskson.
I gasp for air reaching for mine, but it’s too far away. Everything around me silences and I
closemyeyesfallingfromthesky…
…Sittingupinmybed,I’moutofbreath.Fuck,itwasjustadream.Itwasonlyadream.
It’s12:37,thetimemyflightwouldhavedepartedforDenver,andIcan’tdenythatI’malittle
pissedatmyselffornotgoing.EverynightI’vewokenupatthissametimemissingQuinn.Mybrain
sendingmyselfasubliminal“fuckyou.”
Sittingup,Irubmyfaceandlookoutatthewater;it’ssmoothasglass.ThankGodit’sFriday.I
don’tthinkIcantakeanothernightofsleeplikethis.Quinnwillbeherebytheendoftheday.
Grabbingmyphone,I’mtemptedtotexther,butdon’twanttowakeher.
Lyingbackdown,Iclosemyeyes,hopingIcanfallasleep…butIcan’t.
SoIdecidetogointotheofficeandgetajumponmyday.ThesoonerI’mdone,thesooner
she’llbehere.
After showering and dressing, I make the short commute into the office. It’s pitch dark out. I
parkandheadin,thealarmthattypicallysoundswhenIenterthroughthefrontdoorisoff.
That’sstrange.
Flippingonafewlights,Ilookaroundbutdon’tspotanyone.ThenIhearawoman’svoiceand
spotmyfather ’slighton.Shit,ishestillhere?Hewassupposedtoflyhome,orsoIthought.
Walking down the hall, I keep my feet light and stop, listening to them for a moment. They
aren’ttalking,andIhavetolook.Trustme;Idon’twantto,butIhavetoknowwhat’sgoingonand
whohe’swith.
Idon’tthinkhe’sdatedanyonesincemymom.Glancingin,he’sonthesofainhisoffice,the
womanisstraddlinghislapastheyaremakingout.
Jesus,thisisgross.
Itryandfigureoutwhosheis,andthenInoticehersweaternexttothemandrememberitfrom
ameetingtoday.It’soneofourinterns.Ah,fuck!
QuietlyIbackupbeforeeitherofthemspotsmeandheadoutofthebuilding.Bileisintheback
ofmythroat,seeingsomeonesoyoungwithmyfather.She’shalfhisage!Whatisshethinkingand
howdidInothaveanyideathiswasgoingon?
Gettinginmycar,IcallQuinn.Sheanswershalfasleep,“Iseverythingokay?”
“Shit,I’msorry.Iforgotthetime.Callmeinthemorning,whenyou’reup.”
“No,Iwanttohearyourvoice.Whatareyoudoingawake?”
“Youdon’twanttoknow.”
Shepausesandthensays,“ShouldIbeworried?”
Ichuckleandlookoutmywindshield.“No,nothingtoworryabout,beautiful.”
“Comeon;youcan’twakemeupinthemiddleofthenightandnottellme.”
Startingmycar,Idrivebackhome.“Icouldn’tsleep,soIwentintoworkand…Icaughtmydad
with…”Itrailoff,notevenabletospeakthewords.
“With?”sheprobesfurther.
“With one of our interns. She’s like half his age. I’m still trying to process it all. For fuck’s
sake…howdidInotknow?”
“Becausetheydidn’twantyouto.”
“Buthe’soldenoughtobeherfather;that’sjustgross.”
“Rememberwhatyoutoldmewhenwemet?”
“No.”
“Yousaid,‘Everyonefucks.’”
“Okay,that’senough.Thisismydadwe’retalkingabout.ThankGodIdidn’twalkinonthat.”
Shelaughsatmeandasksme,“Whyareyouatworkinthemiddleofthenightanyway?”
“Icouldn’tsleep.Iwastryingtogetaheadstartsinceyou’recomingtonight.”
“Mmmmhhh,Ican’twait,”shetellsme.“ButIthinkImightbegettingsick.”
“What?No,don’tsaythat.”
“Trustme;IwishIwasn’t…butIdon’tfeelwellatall.”
“Callintoworkandhopanearlierflight.I’llworkfromhometodayandtakecareofyou.”
“Thatsoundsreallynice.”
“Thendoit.”
“CanIaskyousomething,Merritt?”
“Ofcourse.”Pullingbackuptomyhouse,Iheadaroundbackandsitonthedeck,enjoyingthe
view.
“Howarewegoingtomakethisworklong-term?Itseemswecan’tbeartobeapartandwe’re
noteventogether.That’snotgoingtogetanyeasier.”
I think about her question, and I’m not sure how to answer her. I don’t know how we got
wrappedupthewaywedid…buthereweare.Idon’tusuallythinkthatfarahead…I’malive-in-the-
momentkindaguy.ButwithQuinn,IfeellikeIhavetothinkfurtherandprepareformorethanjust
lookingforwardtowhattheweekendholds.
Chapter31
Quinn
Lookingthroughthecrowdsofpeopleattheairport,Ican’tspotMerritt.Hesaidhe’dmeetmeright
whenIgotthroughsecurity,butIdon’tseehim.Ihopehedidn’tgetcaughtupatwork.Pullingoutmy
phonetocallhim,I’mstartledashegrabsmefrombehind.“Gotcha!”
“Hiiii!”Iclingtohim,breathinghimin,holdingontohisarms.
“Howareyoufeeling?”henuzzlesmyneck,andIturnaround.
“Better,”Itellhim,andhekissesmehard.Webothgetlostinthemoment,forgettingthatweare
standinginthemiddleoftheairport.Hiscockisgrowing,andI’mawareneitherofushasthebest
self-controlwhenitcomestokeepingourselvesappropriateinpublic.
Slowingthekiss,herestshisforeheadagainstmineandsays,“I’msohappyyou’rehere.”
“Metoo,thankyouforhavingme.Youlookreallyfuckinghot.”
“Youlikemeinasuit,don’tya?”
I nod, and he takes my bag from my shoulder and wraps his hand around mine. He keeps
lookingdownatmelikehecan’tgetenoughandmyheartflutters.
“IfIdon’tletyougobackhome,isthataproblem?”Irollmyeyesathim,andhesays,“What?
I’mjustbeinghonest.”
Weexittheairport,andthewarmairisarefreshingfeeling.“OhmyGod,itfeelsamazing.”
“Ohyeah,Iforgotyou’vebeenusedtothosesub-zerotemperatures.”
ItfeelssogoodthatItakemycoatoff.Walkinguptohiscarheunlocksthedoorsandopens
mine.Sittingonthepassengerseatisahugebouquetofflowers.“Why,thankyou,”ItellhimasIget
comfyinhissleekMercedes,smellingthegorgeousflowers.
“My pleasure.” He tosses my bag in the trunk and then opens his door, unbuttoning his coat
beforehegetsin.“Iwasgonnabringthemin,butIwantedtohavemyhandsfree.”
“Sowhat’stheplan?”Iaskandhebacksoutoftheparkingplace.
“Sex,food,sex,food,sex,food.Thatworkwithyou?”
“Of course, but I’m hungry now.” Reaching over, I rub my hand over his shaft; his dick is
alreadyhard,andhesays,“Byallmeans,eataway,baby.”
***
“Yousaidyoudidn’tcook.”IglareatMerrittashepullssomefoodoutofthefridge.
“No,Itoldyou,Iorderinmoreoftenthannot.ButIlovetocookwhenIhavesomeonetocook
for.”
Ismile,sippingonaglassofwineashepreparesourdinner.“Sonomeatatallforyou?”
“Nope.”
“Haveyoualwaysbeenavegetarian?”
“Ihave.Myparentsare,it’showIwasraised.”
“Haveyouevertriedmeat?”
“Yeah,andIreallydon’tlikehowittastes.”
“Exceptformine?”Hecockshiseyebrowsatmeandgrabshisdickthroughhispants.
“Yes, except for yours.” I kiss his neck and refill my glass, looking around his house. “Have
youlivedhereforlong?”
“Afewyears.”
“Alwaysalone?”
“Yes,”heanswers,andIhatetohaveasked,butIcan’timaginehimbeingallaloneinthishuge
glasshouseonthewater.I’dfiguredheshareditwithanexorsomething.
Gettinglostintheview,hewipeshishandsdryandasksme,“Whatareyouthinking?”
“Nothing.It’sgorgeoushere.”
“Itis.Theviewisevenbetterwithyouinit.”
Ismirkovermyshoulderathim,andhesays,“Justspeakingthetruth.Dinnershouldbedonein
abit.Doyouwanttogositoutback?”
“Sure.”Hetakesmyhandandguidesmeontothedeck.Theairisstillsurprisinglywarm,andI
loveit.Ican’tseemtogetenough.Wesittogetherontheoutdoorsofa,andIaskhim,“Didyouever
confronttheintern?”
“Hellno!”
Ilaughandalmostspitmysipofwineout.“Whynot?Ithoughtyouweregoingto.”
“I was, but then her boyfriend came and picked her up for lunch, and I don’t know. Maybe it
wasn’therinthere.Ididn’tseeherface.”
“We could spy on them?” I joke, and he laughs. “No way, I don’t think we’ll leave at all this
weekend,plus,he’sbackhomeinCalifornia.”
“Whydoeshelivethere?”
“It’swhereourmainhubis.He’salwaystravelingsohe’sallover.”
“Whydoyoureallyputupwithhim?Eventhoughhe’sgoingtoonedaygiveyouthecompany,
isitreallyworthit?”
He finishes his wine and says to me, “What other choice do I have? I’m too old to play
basketball,andifItriedtogoanywhereelselikeAridid,he’dmakemylifehell.SoIplayalongand
dowhatIcantoproveI’mreadytotakeonthecompany.”
“Youreallywantitthatbad,huh?”
“Ido,morethananything…exceptyou.”Hiswordsbringapartofmetolife.Iknowhowmuch
runningthecompanymeanstohim,soforhimtowantmemorethanthatissomethingspecial.
“Yeah?”Iask.
“Yup,andIthinkbecauseIturneddownmydreamsofbasketball,Ihavetomakethiswork.I
can’tfail.”
Iseehispoint—he’sfollowingadreamthatonedaywillpayoffbecauseheletgoofhisreal
passion when he didn’t pursue basketball. But I also hate to see the shit he has to go through to get
there. It’s like when his dad says “jump,” Merritt will bitch, but then he’ll say, “how high?” and do
whateverhisdadwantsandthatisnotthemanthatMerrittis.
Chapter32
Merritt
Draggingmytongueoverhersensitiveskin,shewrithesbeneathme,tryingtoseearoundtheroom,
buttheblindfoldkeepseverythingdark.
“Ididn’tsayyoucouldmove.”Myvoiceislacedwithpassion.Ihaveeachofherhandsbound
toheranklesspreadingherwideandhelplessonmybed.
Iloveplayingwithherandcontrollingher.IalsolovehowwillingandacceptingQuinnis,too.
Shedoesn’tjudgemeandisnotscared,whichIneedinlife.
Inmostofmyrelationships,themomentI’vetriedtoshowthisside,womenfreak;theyarenot
acceptingintheslightest.ButnotQuinn.FromthemomentIblindfoldedherortiedhertothebed,she
waswillingandcompliant,andnowheresheisagain,powerless,lettingmehaveallofthecontrol.
Flickingmytongueoverherclit,Iteaseheragain,andthistime,Itellher,stoppingforabrief
moment.“Youcancomenow.”
It’snotbutanotherfewseconds,andshe’sscreamingmyname,cominghard.
Her pussy now so wet that I can’t wait to fuck her. Pulling away, I take the blindfold off, her
sexyeyesfindmine,andIgripeachofherasscheeksasInudgemyselfinsideher.
“Fuck,you’retight,”Imurmur,herpussysoconstrictingthatitlightsmyinsidesup.
Lookingdownatmydick,theveinsarebulgingasImoveinandoutofher.God,thisisintense.
Maybeit’sthisangle.Iwatchourbodiesandthepointwheretheyconnect,herpussylipsspreadwide,
eatingmeup.I’dplannedonfuckingherasstonight,andIstillcould‘causeshehasmyshaftsowet
thatI’dhavenoproblemgoingin,butthisistoogood.Takingmythumb,Istickitinhermouth.She
sucks and bites it, crying out in pleasure as she takes all of me. And then I pull it away, rubbing
aroundtherimofherass,“Yes,”shebegsme,andIfingerherwhileIblastaheavyloaddeepinside
hertightslit.
Shecomesagain,herentirebodyfightingtherestraints,andIlovetoseehersohotandhorny,
givingovertothepleasureofwhatwearetogether.Ourconnectionisexplosive,andIhopethisis
justthebeginningofmoretimeslikethis.
Pullingmycockfromher,sheisexhausted,butIcouldgoagain.Iremovethestrapsfromher
wristsandcantellshe’sgonnabruise.“Youcan’tfightthathard,baby,”Itellherandkissthetender
skinonherarm.
“Itfeelssogood,though;itmakeseverythingsomuchmoreintense.”
“Youlikeitthen,beingtiedupandhelpless?”
“Yes,morethanIcould’veeverimagined.”
“Haveyoueverdoneanythinglikethiswithaguybefore?”
“Hell,no.I’dbescaredandrunningforthehills.”
“Youdidn’truntonight.”
“‘Causethere’snothingyoucoulddothatcouldmakemerun.”
“ThankGod,‘causeIwould’vechasedyounaked.”
She rolls over in my arms, looking me in the eye and says, “Who knew when we met and I
thoughtallmenweredicks,thatthisiswherewe’dbe?”
“You didn’t ever think I was a dick, though. You just wanted mine and didn’t know how to
handleit.MissUnplugged-From-The-World,guardingyourheartandall.”
“Hey,” her eyebrows scrunch as she pouts a little, “I was hurt, and you…you know if I think
aboutit,youtookadvantageofme.Youknewitandstillpursuedme.Ihaven’tquitegivenintoyou,
Merritt.”
“Yes,youhave,andyouknowit.Underneathitall,Icouldsmellthefreakinsideofyouwanting
out.”
Welaughatourlittlebanter,andIholdhertightlyagainstmychest.Herfacesquishedagainst
me,andIclosemyeyes,owningthismoment,thissolitudebecauseinjustacoupleofquickdays…
she’llbegone,andwe’llbothbemiserablebeingawayfromeachother…again.
Chapter33
Quinn
WakingupinMerritt’sbed,he’slyingnexttome,watchingmesleepandhasthesexiestgrinonhis
face.“Morning,”hesaysthroughasmileandkissesme.
“Morning.Whattimeisit?”
Hegrabshisphoneandsays,“Ninethirty.”
“Youbeenuplong?”
“Yeah,foralittlewhile.Ihandledsomefiresatworkandthoughtwecouldgetout.”
“Whatdidyouhaveinmind?”
“Youeverbeenhorsebackriding?”
“No,why?”
“Wannagiveitatrytoday?”
“Merritt,areyouacowboydeepdown?”Iteasehim.“Hiddenbeneathallthosesexylayersis
thereamanthatcravestheopenrange?”
“No, ma’am,” he shakes his head and hops out of bed, completely naked. His ass cheeks flex
witheverystep.
“I’mcallingyourbluff!”Ihollerout,andhewalksoutofhisclosetonlywearingacowboyhat
ashestrutstotheshower.
“Iknewit!”
Hesmirksoverhisshoulderatme,gettingintheshower,andIstepoverhishatthathetossed
onthefloortofollowhim.
Afteraverythoroughwashingandfucking,IthinkImighthavetoskiphorsebackriding.My
pussyissorefromsomuchsex.He’sananimal;therereallyarenolimits.
Onthedrive,Iaskhim,“So,arethesehorsesyours?”
“Kinda.Theyweremymom’s.Theywereherprideandjoybeforeshepassed.”
“I’msorry,Merritt,Ihadnoideashewasgone.”
“It’sokay;shepassedwhenIwasateenager.Sometimes,IfeellikeIknowthehorsesbetterthan
Iknewher.”
“Howdidshepass?”Ihatetoaskbuthavetoknow.
“Cancer, it came fast and took her quickly. That’s when my dad changed. Without her, he
becameaprick.Socoldandclosedofftotherestoftheworld.Ithoughtitwashiswayofgrieving
andthatastimewentonitwouldgetbetter,butitdidn’t.”
“Isthatalsowhyyoudidn’tpursueyourbasketballdreams?”
“Itis;Iwashopingifweworkedtogetherthatthingswouldgetbacktohowtheyusedtobe…
butthatneverhappened.Wegrewfurtherapartandhonestlyseeinghimwithourinterntheothernight
disgustedme.Mymomwould’vebeenappalledhadshecaughthimwithsomeonesoyoung.”
“Well,I’msureshe’dbeproudofthemanthatyou’vebecome.”
“Ihopeso,Quinn.”
Hepullsdownadirtroad.Thedustmorphsaroundus,andIcanfeelthesunheatingmethrough
thewindshield.Wehavetheaironlow,andinColorado,youwouldn’timaginerunningyourACthis
timeofyear.
Up ahead is a large barn surrounded by acres and acres of open land. There are quite a few
horsesallover,andasheparkshiscarinfrontofabarn,hesaystome,“Theretheyare.”
Lookinginside,Iseetwowhitehorsespeeringoutatus.“Thewhiteones?”Iaskandpoint.
“Yes,ma’am.”Hehopsoutofthecarandplaceshishatonhishead.IlaughathispoliteTexas
boy“ma’am”andfollowbehindhim,lovingthewayhisasslooksinhisjeans.
“Merritt!”anoldermanexclaims,ridinguponahorsehimself.
“John,howareyou,sir?”heasks,andtheyshakehands.
“Verywell,son.”
“Good. This is Quinn, my…” he trails off, introducing me and I jump in, the words spilling
from my lips. “Girlfriend, I’m his girlfriend. It’s nice to meet you, John.” The man tips his hat,
leaningdowntokissmyknucklesasIextendmyhanduptohim.
“Likewise.”Hislipsaredry,butIcanseethereisnoharmintheinteraction.
Merritt’seyesarealloverme,andI’msureit’sbecauseofwhatIjustsaid.Wehaven’treally
spokenmuchmoreaboutwhatthefuturelookslike,butwhenIthinkaboutit,IwanttobehisandI
wanthimtobemine.“Thegirlsareallsuitedupandreadyforya,”Johnsays.
“Great,thankyou.”
Thenheturnsonhishorse,andMerrittandIwalkintothebarn.
“Girlfriend?”heasksme.
“Yeah,isthataproblem?”
“No,”heblurtsout,“Noproblematall.”
Thehorsesaresocurioustoseeus,liketwochildrenmeetingnewfriends.
“ThisisBell,andthisisTink.”
“LiketheDisneycharacters?”
“Yup,mymomwasahugefan.”
Merrittopensthehalfdoortotheirstall,andIfollowhimin.Hepetsbothoftheirnoses,and
youcanseerightawaytheyknowhimverywell,andIstandnotsurewhattodo.Hetakesmyhand
andplacesitonBell’snose,hereyeslookdeepintomine,sotrustingandloving.GentlyIbegintopet
herthewayheis.
“Here,touchTink,too.We’vegottaseewhichoneyouconnectwith.”
AsIstandwithbothofmyhandsplantedfirmlyonthehorses’noses,Irubbetweentheireyes
andMerrittmovesbehindme,holdingmybodyclosetohis.
“Whatdoyouthink,girls?”heaskstalkingtothehorses.“Really,yousure?”
“Whatdidtheysay?”Iask,actingconcernedasIplayalongwithhim.
“Theybothagreed…thatyou’regonnaneedtorideme.”
Chapter34
Merritt
“IsthereanythingIcoulddotoconvinceyoutostay?”IaskQuinn.
“You’d have to take me hostage at this point. I have a big client at work next week that I’m
takingtheleadon.”
“Thatshouldn’tbeaproblem.Yourparentswon’tcomelookingforyouforatleastaweek.”
“Stopit.Rememberwhatyousaidlasttime—it’sonlyfourdays.”
Holdingontothesidesofhergorgeousface,Ihearherwords,butmakingmyselfbelievethem
isawholeotherstory.I’vegrowntodependonourtimetogether.Everyinteractionissoamazing.
“After what you said at the barn, I want you to know now you’re mine, no more bullshit, no
morewaveringbackandforthscaredyou’regonnaenduphurt.IfIwanttoflytoDenvertofuckyou
andleave,thenIwill,orifIwantyouatmyhousefortheweekend,it’sgottahappen.Ineedtoknow
you’reallrightwiththat,okay?
Shenodsandgivesmeahugesmile.“Tellme,”Iorderher.
“Okay.”
Pullingmeclosertoher,shekissesmyneck,huggingmehard.Thentheymakealastboarding
callforherflight,andIhatethatshehastogo.Yes,it’salittleoverboard,butIboughtatickettoo,so
Icouldbewithherforaslongaspossible.Idon’tknowwhatitisabouther,butthewomanisdriving
mecrazy.
“Ishouldgo.”
“Thankyouforeverything,Quinn.”Ikissheragain,herindulgentlipssosmoothagainstmine.
“Callmeassoonasyouland?”
She stands and I pull her down to me, kissing her once more, then I watch her walk to the
attendant,herassstaringbackatme,remindingmeofhowamazingitwastofuck.Andthen…she’s
gone.
Standingup,IlookoutthewindowatherplaneandknowIneedtogo,orhell,Imightjustget
onit.Walkingtowardstheexit,Ispotabaranddecidetostopandhaveadrink.
“I’llhaveawhiskeyontherocks,please.”
Thebartenderpoursmydrinkandasksme,“Youcomingorgoing?”
“Huh?”Irespond,inadaze,alreadymissingQuinn.
“Youflyinginoroutofhere?”
“Oh,Ilivehere,justdroppedmygirlfriendoff.”
Henodsandhelpsanothercustomer.Drowningmysorrowsinthealcohol,Ipulloutmyphone
asitvibrates.Gonnapowerdown,thankyouforeverythingthisweekend,babe.
Fly safe, baby. I hit send and set my empty glass down; the bartender refills it, and I exhale
heavily.She’smine,andit’sonlyfourdays…Icandothis.
Chapter35
Quinn
HuggingKamiasImeetherforacupofcoffee,shelookssocutealldressedupforherinterview.
“Areyounervous?”Iaskher.
“Yeah,alittle…Iguess.”
“Don’tbe,youknowyougotthis.”
“Ihopeso.”
“SohowarethingswithJacob?”
Shesmiles,sippingonhercoffeeandsays,“Reallygood.We’retryingtohaveababy.”
“Shutup.Howexciting!Whendidyoudecidethis?”
“InSteamboat.Iforgotmypillswhenwewentupthere,andwetalkedaboutthings,andwe’re
bothready.”
Leaningover,Igivemyfriendabighug,sohappyforher.“Soyou’reliketrying-trying?”
“Uhhuh.”
“Wow,thatissoawesome.You’vegottakeepmeupdated,girl.”
“Iwill;so…howarethingswithMerritt?”
“Good.” I sound like a schoolgirl—my voice changes a pitch as butterflies take over my
stomach.“It’sjustsohardtobeawayfromhimeveryweek.”
“Butyouseehimontheweekends,right?”
“Ido,andeventhoughit’sallsonew,there’ssomethingabouthim,andus…therelationshipis
likenothingI’veeverhad.Forthefirsttimeinmylife,itfeelsreal—genuine.”
“OhQuinn,I’msohappyforyou,andwhatagreatsnag,he’ssuperhot.”
“Youhavenoidea.Iwasathishousethisweekend—”
“HelivesinTexas,right?”
“Yeah.Andhehasthiscowboyhat,whichistotallynotmything,butwhenhecallsme‘ma’am’
andwearsit,IswearIloseallcontrol.Weevendidanal,”Iwhisperandlookaroundmakingsureno
oneheardme.
“Really?Howwasit?”
“Sogood.Iwasscareditwasgonnahurt,butitwasthetotalopposite.”
“Damn,girl.I’mgettinghotjustthinkingaboutit.”
Welaughlikeacoupleofgigglyteenagersandthenshechecksthetime,“OhGod,I’vegotta
go.”
“Goodluck,sweetie.”IhughertightlyasshewalkstotheelevatorbanksandIheadbackover
tomybuilding.Ontheway,IcallMerritt.
“Iwasjustthinkingaboutyou,”heanswersinsuchasexytone.
“Yeah,whatabout?”
“Hmmm,letmeclosemydoor.”Ihearthedoorlatch,andthenhesays,“Iwasthinkingabout
yourass.Fuck,Ilovedit.”
“Metoo.”
“Solisten,wemighthavealittleproblemwiththisweekend’splans.”
“What?No!Why?”
“There’sahugeoilcompanythatjustcameonthemarket.Thiswouldbemonumentalforour
companyandmeifIcanclosethedeal.Rightnow,I’mtryingtonaildownapriceandifIcan’t,I’ll
likelyhavetoflytoCaliforniatodoitinperson.”
“Can’tyourdaddoit?Helivesthere.”
“Youknowhecan’t.I’vegottoprovetohimthatI’mready.”
Myheart keeps sinkingfurther and furtherdown to the bottomof my stomach.As I enter my
building,Iimaginenotseeinghim‘tilnextweekend,andIsaytohim,“Idon’tthinkIcanmakeitnine
dayswithoutseeingyou.”
“Meneither,babe,that’swhyI’mgonnagetthisdealclosed,andit’snotgonnainterferewith
ourplans…butIhadtobehonest.”
“I’mbackatwork;Ishouldgo.”
“Don’tbedown.I’llgetitdone.”
Ihangupwithhimandwandertomydesk,bummedout.Sittingdown,IrealizethatI’mfalling
forhimandI’mnotsurehowithappenedandsodamnquickly.ThesamepatternsIalwaystryand
avoidalwaysseemtohappen,andthisiswhenthingsbegintogowrong.
Chapter36
Merritt
“ShouldIbookit,Mr.Smith?”SuzyasksmeasIstareatmycomputer,waitingforaresponsefrom
Exlon,thecompanywe’retryingtoacquire.
“Givemealittlelonger.”
Shewalksoff,andIpickupthephone,callingmycontactatthecompanytoseeifwe’vegotten
aresponse.Thereisnoanswer,andI’mpissedofftobedickedaroundsobadly.Icallmydad’soffice
toseeifthey’veheardanything.
Hisreceptionistpatchesmethrough,andIaskhimrakingmyfingersthroughmyhair,“Whatif
Idon’tclosethedeal?”
“Then I don’t think you’re ready to run this company.” I pace across my office, pissed, that
againit’scomingdowntoonedeal.“Weneedthisdeal,Merritt,morethanwe’veeverneededtoclose
adealbefore.”
“That’swhatyoualwaysfuckin’say,”Iscoffathim.“It’slikeyou’rechangingyourmindand
giving me a task that’s unrealistic. You know as well as I do that we aren’t going to come to terms
withthem.Theywantwaytoomuchmoney.”
“Merritt,you’renotlookingatthebiggerpicture.Thisishowwe’vegottentobeasbigaswe
are.Idon’thavemuchtimelefthere,andyouknowit.You’vegottaprovetomeyoucansteerthis
companyintothefuture.”
“I’mready,andyouknowIam.I’vebeenworkingmyassoffforyou,IgottheSerranosback,
andthisweekalone,I’veacquiredtennewsiteswithprimeoilreadyforustobegindrilling.”
“ClosingtheExlondealwillbelikeacquiringamillionnewsites,soifyouwantthiscompany,
thenclosethefuckingdeal.”
Lookingatmyownreflectionintheglasswindowofmyoffice,Icouldgooffonhimforso
many reasons. It’s always something else when it comes to him, another reason to stall or another
hooptojumpthrough.Healwayssays,“Youknowmytimeiscoming…”Butwhen?Ijusthopeinthe
endit’llallbeworthit.
Hanginguponhim,IbuzzSuzyandtellher,“Bookit.”
“Yes,sir,”shetellsme,andIhangup,hatingthatIhavetocallQuinnandtellherthatI’mnot
coming to Denver this weekend. But what other choice do I have? He’s leaving me with none, like
always.
Closingmyofficedoor,Idialhernumber,andsheanswersonthefirstring.
“Theflowersaregorgeous.”
“Yougotthem?”Iask,almostforgettingthatIhadSuzysendthemtoher.
“Idid,justnow.Theyaresittingonmydesk,andnowmyofficesmellslikeagarden.Ican’t
waitforyoutoseethem,I’llbringthemhometonight.”
“Aboutthat…Iwon’tmakeitafterall.IdohavetogotoCali.”
“Okay,” she sounds understanding, not the response I’d expected. I guess I don’t really know
whatIwasexpecting.
“Yousure?”
“Ofcourse,Iknowhowmuchyourworkmeanstoyou.I’llcatchuponsomeTVandseeyou
nextweekend.”
***
GlaringatmyfatherashesitsnexttomeduringourlunchwiththeExlonexecs,I’mpissedhe
showedup.Thiswassupposedtobeallme,mychancetoproveIwasreadytorunthecompany,and
nowhereheis.
“CanIgetanother?”Iaskthewaiter,pointingtomydrink.
I haven’t said much of anything this entire time, my dad being the center of attention like
always.
“Haven’tyouhadenough?”heasksme,leaningover,andIfinishtherestofthedrinkinfront
ofmenotansweringhim.
Myphonevibrates,andIpullitout,I’mhere,whereareyou?Quinntextsme.
Whatthefuck?
Likehere-here?Howisthatpossible?Lookingatmyphone,thescreenbecomesblurry.Fuck,I
drankalot.Itextherback.Where?
Cali, your hotel. Probably shouldn’t have given me access to your calendar. But I brought the
sash.
Nowanxioustoleaveandtakeoutsomeofmypent-upfrustrationsthewayIlovetomost,Iask
thequestionofthehour,“Solet’sbehonest.”Thegroupofsixmen,myfatherincluded,alllookat
me.Iclearmythroatandtrynottosoundsodrunk.“What’sitgonnataketoclosethedeal?”
Oneofthemenleansforward,restinghiselbowsonthetableandsaystome,“Ithinkabouta
halfmillionmore.”
“Whataboutapartnership?”Ioffer,knowing…Ihavetoclosethedeal.Hedidn’tsaywehadto
bethesoleowner,justtocloseit.
Themenallseemintrigued.Myfather,ontheotherhand,issuddenlytense.“Whatdidyouhave
inmind?”
“Letustakeoveryourleasesforoneyear,withtheoptiontobuyattheendoftheterm.It’llgive
youthecashyouneedfromgoingbankrupt,andit’llgiveustheoilweneedtoproducerevenue.”
Themenseemtoallbeconsideringit,andmyfathersays,“AsCEO,I’msorry,butI’monly
lookingtopurchaseyourcompany,onehundredpercent.”
“Ahalfmillionmore,”theirCEOsays,andthentheystand,shakingourhandsbeforeleaving
thetable.Myfather,asusual,ruinedthenegotiations.
“Whatthehellwasthat,Merritt?”hescoldsme.
“Youtoldmetoclosethedeal,soIwasclosingit.”
“ItoldyouIwantedtoacquirethem.”
“Sure, but you didn’t say how. And a lease-to-buy option is a good one. We’d have revenues
cominginnextmonth.Whichiswayfasterthantheprocessofpurchasingthemisgoingtobe.You
know with lawyers and paperwork, it’ll at least be a year, and what, are you gonna stay until that’s
donetoo?”
Hedoesn’tanswerme,andIwalkawayfrommydad.He’spissedandhotonmyheels.“You
don’thavetheauthoritytomakethosedecisions,”hesays.
“OfcourseIdon’t,‘causehadIcomeherealonelikeI’dplanned,I’dhavethedealclosed,but
withouttheauthoritytodoit.”
Walking up to my hotel, my dad walks off not saying anything else. I hope he feels fuckin’
stupidforshootingdownmyidea,‘causehe’sgottaknowit’sbrilliantandthebestwaytoacquireone
ofthelargestcommercialoilproducingcompanies.
MythoughtsarecutshortasIspotQuinn,asgorgeousasever,sittinginoneofthechairsinthe
lobby.She’sreallyhere,andIhavenocluehowIgotsogoddamnlucky.Butthisshitdayjustturned
completelyaround.
Chapter37
Quinn
“Ican’tbelieveyou’rehere,”Merrittsays,takingmeinhisarmsandpinningmedownonthebed.
“Icouldn’thelpmyself.”
“IsthatwhyyouweresocoolwhenIsaidIcouldn’tcome?”
“Uhhuh,”Itellhim,becauseaswetalkedonthephoneearlier,Iwasalreadybookingmyflight.
“Fuck, I’ve missed you,” he tells me, pressing me hard into the mattress and kissing me.
Holdingontothebackofhishead,Ikickmyshoesoffandworkmytongueagainsthis.
Hepullsbackforasecond;hiseyesareglazedoverandred.“Areyoudrunk?”Iask.
“Maybealittle,”heconfessesandslidesoffme,pushingmydressupandfingeringme.
“Howwasyourmeeting?”Iask,worriedthathe’sdrunkandhandlingbusiness.
“It sucked. My asshole of a dad showed up, and it really made me wonder why I even came
here.”He’snolongerfingeringme,justcuppingmysexandIcantellthathisbrainisspinning.
“Letitgo,baby.Don’tlethimintoyourhead.We’retogethernow,andyoucanfocusonmeall
nightlong.”
Henodsandkissesmyneck.Takinghimbytheshoulders,Irollhimontohisback.Heletsme
straddlehim,hishandsbothrestingonmythighs.Liftingmydressovermyhead,mytitsspringfree
andhiseyesgetwide.“Youflewwithoutabraandpantieson?”
“Maybe.Doesthatturnyouon?”
“Alot!”
Leaning down, I kiss his neck, nibbling and sucking on his skin, and he moves his hands
squeezingmyasscheeks,spreadingthemwide.
Ourbodiesgrindtogether,likeacoupleofhighschoolersdryhumping,andImakequickwork
ofremovinghispants.Hishardcockmakesmeunbelievablywet,andIdon’twasteasecondbeforeI
settledownonit,mypussyclenchinghimashepusheshimselfupinsideme.
Knottingmyfingersintomyhair,Ibouncewithhim,hisballshittingmyasswitheverythrust,
he’smovingsofast,andthenhestops.Lookingdownathim,he’sgotthatlook—theonethatsayshe
wantsmore,needsmore.Withoutasingleword,Iliftoffofhim.Hespreadsmycheekswide,andI
reachback,clenchinghissloppydickasIlineitupwithmyass.
Ourbodiesconnectlikeapuzzle,hefitsrightinsideofme.Thefeelingoffullnessmakesme
wanttocomeundone.Stillholdingmyasshepumpshimselfinandoutofme,givingmeeverysingle
inchthatheis.MynoisesarcandmybreathingissoquickthatIwon’tlastmuchlonger.
Ifighttostayincontrol,butit’stoomuch.Myinsidesquiverandtheinstanthereallypicksup
speed,Icomehard.“Fuck!Fuck!Fuck!”Ichant,havinganunbelievablyintenseorgasm.Eachstream
ofhiswhiteishotinsideofme,andashefinishes,heflipsmeontomyback,rippinghisshirtoffas
hepummelsintome.Onehandissplayedacrossmychestwhilehisotherholdsoneofmylegstothe
side.
He’s ruthless, fucking me harder than ever, my body scooting up the bed. I reach above me,
pressingmyfingerstotheheadboardtokeepmyselfinplace.
“Youlikebeingfuckedhard?”heasksmeinadeep,sexytone.
“Yes.”
Oureyesareconnected,lockedoneachother ’sinawhirlwindofsex.WithMerritt,thereareno
rulesorboundaries,justeachother ’srawestdesires,andhebringssomanydesiresoutofme.Every
singlehiddenfantasythatIhave,Iwanttoexperiencethemallwithhim.
***
“Shouldweorderroomservice?”IaskMerritt,asIdryofffromourshower.
“Ifyouwantto,butwecanalsogoout.”
“Whateveryouwanttodoisfinewithme.”Hewalksupbehindme,hislargehandsroaming
mybodyasherubsupanddownit.
“Weshouldgoout,”Itellhim,knowingifwestayin,allwe’lldoisfuck,andasmuchasIlove
it,Ineedtobeabletowalknormallyformydad’sbirthdayMondaynight.
“God,you’rebeautiful,”hetellsme,kissingmyneckandthengettingdressedhimself.
“Thank you. Would you put this on me?” I ask handing him my bracelet he bought for me in
Steamboat.
“Didyoueverputawishinside?”
“Idid.”
“What’sitsay?”heasksmecuriously.
“I’mnottellingyou,oritwon’tcometrue.”
Herollshiseyesatmeandpretendstoopenthebox.Ismackhisarm,andheactslikeIhave
superhumanstrengthandactuallyhurthim.Givinghimahug,IkissthespotIhit.Buthetriestoopen
mybraceletagain.
“Fine,fine,I’lltellyou.”
“Youwill?”
“Yeah,‘causeit’salreadycometrue.”
“Thentellme.”
“I’mjustjoking.”Igrinfromeartoearandgrabmypurse,waitingforMerrittatthedoor.He
spanks me as he opens the door, and we wander down the hall hand in hand. He presses the down
buttonontheelevatorandsaystome,“Haveyoueverfuckedinanelevator?”
“No,you?”
“Nope,wannatry?”
Inodandraisemyeyebrowstohim.Asthedoorsopen,wegotostepin,butsomeoneexitsand
whenIseetheguystandingthere,myworldhalts.
“Dad,”Merrittsays,andI…Whatthefuckisgoingon?Ihavenocluehowthisisevenfucking
possible.Merritt’sdaddoesn’tanswer.Insteadhe’sstaringatme,thesamewayheusedto,thesame
lookhegavemethatmademefallforhiminthefirstplace.
“Ididn’tknowyouhadcompany,son.”
“Oh yeah, this is my girlfriend, Quinn. She flew in and surprised me. Quinn, this is my dad,
Charles.”Iswallownotsurehowtorespond,andhestretchesouthishandinafriendlygestureasif
hedoesn’tknowme.“It’sapleasuretomeetyou,Quinn.”
AsIshakehishandback,I’mstunned,sicktomystomach,andnotsurewhattodo.
Chapter38
Merritt
Theyshakehands,andhesaystome,“Merritt,Iwasjustcominguptoseeyou.Igottothinkingabout
yourideawithExlon,anditmightnotbesuchabadwaytogo.”
“Really?”Iaskhimshocked.
“Yeah, I mean, we do need the revenue, and I’m not gonna stick around for much longer. We
shoulddiscussitmore.”
“QuinnandIweregoingtogrababitetoeat,doyouwannatalkafterwards?”
“Ihaveameeting,”hesays,andIlookatQuinn,hopingshedoesn’tmindifIinvitehim.She
smilesatme,andIsqueezeherhand.
“Wannajoinus?”
“Sure,ifyoudon’tmind?”helooksatQuinn,andshesays,“Oh,notatall.”
He presses the call button on the elevator and says to us, “So how long have you two been
together?”
“What’sitbeen,babe?”Iaskher,andsheshrugshershoulders,seeminglyquiet.
“Afewmonths.”
“Howdidyoumeet?”heasks.
“Onthattrip,AriinvitedmetoinColorado.”
“Ahhh,soyouknowAri?”
Shenodsandhesays,“Whereshouldweeat?”
“Wherever.”
Wefollowmydadintotherestaurantatthehotelandgetseatedrightaway.Quinnhasn’tsaid
much,andit’snotlikehertobequiet.“Areyouokay?”Iaskher.
“Yeah,I’mjustgettingamigraine,that’sall.”
“Thisokay?”mydadasksus.
“Yeah, it’s great,” I respond and open my menu. I glance over mine and decide on steak and
eggs.Thennoticemydadhasn’ttouchedhis,he’sstudyingQuinninaverypeculiarway.
“SowhatmadeyouchangeyourmindonExlon?”Iaskhim.
“I was going to wait to tell you this on your birthday, but December 31st will be my last day
with the company. That’s why I’ve been pushing you so hard. So we don’t have much time. I’ve
contactedourlegalteam,andtheyaredraftingupthepaperworkaswespeak.”
“Wow,okay.”
Thenewskindacomesasashock.Imean,Ikneworhopeditwaseventuallycoming,butjust
yesterday he was busting my balls about being ready to run the company, and now he’s having the
paperworkdraftedforit.
“SoIthinkweshouldmoveforwardwithExloninthewayyouproposed.Itrustyoucanclose
thedeal,howeveryouseefit?”
“Absolutely.”
I’mstunnedsittinghere.I’vegotthegirlofmydreamsandwhatI’veworkedallmylifefor,is
finallycomingtrue.
“So,Quinn,whatisitthatyoudoforaliving?”heasksher.
“I’minthefinancialindustry.”
“Oh,whatdoyoudo?”
“I’maninvestmentadvisor.”
“Nice,Ishouldreallygetoneofthose.Doyouhaveacard?”
“Quinn doesn’t work with people she knows,” I tell him, trying to save her from the
awkwardness.Shealreadyseemsquietandnotherself,soIdon’twanthertohavetoexplaintomy
dad,whoshejustmet,thatshecan’thelphim.
“Probablybetter,I’vebeentheremyself.MerrittandIhavehadourfairshareofissues.”
As I look at my dad, his sudden change in attitude is so bizarre that I begin to wonder if he’s
puttingonashowforQuinn.Andifheis…why?He’snotonetocarewhatothersthinkabouthim,so
whystartnow?
***
“Well,thatwasweird,”ItellQuinnaswegetbacktoourroomfrombreakfast.
“Whatwas?”
“Uhhh,mydad,beingallnice.Iknowyoudon’tknowhim,butthat’snothowhenormallyis.
Doyoureallythinkhe’sactuallydraftingupthedocumentsforthebusiness?”
“Ifhesaysso,I’msureheis.”Quinnliesdownonthebed;hereyesareheavy,andIcantellher
headiskillingher.“Doyouhaveanymedicinehere?”Iask.
“No,Ileftitallathome.”
“Wantmetogoandgetyousomethingfromthepharmacy?”
“Youdon’thaveto,justholdme.”
Kickingoffmyshoes,Ilinemybodyalonghersandwrapherinmyarms.Breathingherin.
Herscentissoamazing.I’mnotsurehoweverythingturnedoutthewayitdid,butithas,andsoonI’ll
be taking the first real step in owning my own company. All of my years of hard work are finally
payingoff.
Chapter39
Quinn
WatchingMerrittleavesohecangomeetwithExlon,I’mstillsosicktomystomach,andmentally
I…I’mamess,sofuckedupaboutallofthis,andnotsurewhattodo.I’mlyingtohim,andIhateit.
Butwhatdo Isayto him?Howdo Itellhim? Ikeep askingmyselfover andover,and eachtime,I
comeupwithnothing.
Mypalmsaresweaty,andmyinsidesaresickwithdeceit.Ican’tbeartohurthim;he’sbeenso
goodtome.Bitingmythumbnail,thereisaknockonthedoor.Gettinguptoanswerit,Iassumeit’s
Merritt,andheforgotsomething,butasIlookoutthepeephole,it’sCharles,andI’mnotsurewhatto
do.
“Quinn,Iknowyou’reinthere.”
Placingmyhandonthehandle,Iturnitasmyheartraces,andhestepsinside.Ibackupandsit
downonthebed,barelyabletolookathim.He’sstandinginthemiddleoftheroom,glaringdown
me,andIhatemyselfsobad.“Whyareyoudoingthis?”Ican’tanswerhim;Ican’tevenlookathim.
“Areyoudoingthistogetbackatme?”
I swallow and remind myself to remain in control. I remember how Charles can be—very
unreasonable.“Ididn’tknowhewasyourson.”
“Ohcomeon,youexpectmetobelievethat?You’remyfinancialadvisor.Youknoweverything
aboutme.”
“Idon’t.Inevermanagedyouraccountsfromthedaytheycameintoouroffice.”
“That’salie,andyouknowit.Yougloatedaboutsigningme.Boughtthatshinynewcar.”
“Ididn’t,andthat’sthefuckingtruth.”
“Soyouwantmetobelievethatyoubeingwithmysonisamerecoincidence?”
“Yes,itis.HonesttoGod.”
“Honey,youneedtogetbetteratlying.Evenyoucan’tbelievethat.”
“I’m not your ‘honey.’ Merritt told you we met on vacation in Colorado, through Ari. How
couldIhaveknownhewasgoingtobethere?Igoonthosetripseveryyear.”
“I’m not buying what you’re selling. I think this is your way of getting back at me because I
endedthings.”
“It’snot,Ilovehim.WhatheandIhaveisreal.Wehavetotellhimaboutus.”
“You’renottellinghimshit!”
“ThehellI’mnot.Youcan’ttellmewhattodoanymore.”
“Comeon,Quinn,webothknowyou’renotgoodenoughforhim.You’rejustamoney-hungry
whore.Nameyourprice,andI’llletyouwalk,he’llneverknow.ButIdon’tneedyouinhishead.”
“I’mnotleavinghim,andmostdefinitelydon’thaveaprice.”
Hestepsclosetome,thesmellofhiscolognenownauseatingtomeandhesays,“Ifyouwon’t
leavehim,thenI’llshowhimthethingsyou’vedonewithme.Irecordedthemall.”
“Youdidn’trecordshit,youfuckingbastard.”
“Thechoiceisyours,sweetheart.Doyouthinkmyson’sgonnawantyouafterheseesyouare
mysloppyseconds?”
Iopenthedoortothehotelroom,angerblazinginmyeyes.“Go!”Ishout,andhetriestotouch
measIpushhimout.“Keepyourfuckinghandsoffme,”Iyellandslamit.
Slidingdowntothefloor,huddlingmykneestomychest,Isobuncontrollablylikeababy.How
couldhedothis?DoeshereallynotcareaboutMerritt’shappinessatall?
Thinking of everything makes me so sick. This will crush him. Charles is right—he’ll never
lookatmethesamewayagain,nomatterwhat.
Pickingupmyphone,Ineedtohavetheupperhand.IhavetogettoMerrittbeforehisdaddoes
ifIwantanychanceofsavingthisrelationship.Butlookingatthescreenofmyphone,Ican’tbring
myselftocallhim.I’mjustinshock—stunnedthatthisismyreality.
Deepdown,mygutistellingmethatCharlesdoesn’thaveavideo.I’dknowifherecordedus
doinganything,soit’smywordagainsthis.Iimaginewhatit’lldotoMerrittfindingout,andIcan’t
dothattohim.Hemeanstoomuchtome.
Butwhatifsomehow,thereisavideo,thenwhat?IdecidetosendMerrittatexttogethimback
here,totalktohim,heneedstohearthisfromme.
ButasItypethewords,theynauseateme.Runningintotherestroom,Ithroweverythingupand
lieonthecoldtilefloor.Ican’thurthim.Ican’timaginethewayhe’dlookatme.
Completelyfucked,Istareupattheceiling,brokenfromtheinsideout.Whyisthishappening
tome…why?
***
Waiting for Merritt to return from his meeting, I’m on edge. My mind is constantly battling
withinitselfaboutwhattodo.AndasIfeellikeI’mabouttoloseit…hewalksintotheroom.
“Youknow,Iloveknowingyou’rewaitingforme,baby.”
Iaboutcry,imaginingthatsoon,hewon’twantmewaitingforhim.“Howwasyourmeeting?”I
barelychokeoutthewords,tryingtosettlemybelly.
“Itwasgood,Iclosedthedeal,babe.”
Heissohappy,Icanseetheexcitementalloverhisface,andIcan’tbringhimdownrightnow.
Inside,Ihatemyself.ThismanthatI’vegrowntoloveanddependonsomuch,whoismyeverything,
doesn’t know what I’ve done. Even though it wasn’t intentional, it’ll eventually come out, and that
scaresme.Charlesisatickingtimebomb.Atanyminute,he’llruinitall,videoornot.Butlooking
intohiseyes,Ijustneedonemorenormalday,beforeIlethimgo.
“I’msohappyforyou,babe,”Itellhimandholdhimclose.
“It’sthefirststepinsecuringourfuture.”
“Yeah?”Iask,hatingthatitcan’tbetrue.Thisisthefirsthe’sspokenofafuturetogether,andit
won’thappen.
“Yeah,whatdidyouthink?I’dgetthecompany,andwe’dstillbetravelingeveryweekend?”
“Well,I’dhopednot,Iguess.”
Hekissesme,andIkisshimback,prayingtoGodthatsomehow,ourtimedoesn’tend,thatwe
canpersevereandlastforever.
“Youguess?”Hiseyebrowsriseashelooksdeepintomyeyes.
“YouknowwhatImean.”
“Ido,I’mjustteasingyou.I’msohappyrightnow;weshouldcelebrate.”
“Whatdidyouhaveinmind?”
“Justthis…”hesays,“Justthis,baby…”
Chapter40
Merritt
“Doessixo’clockwork?”Suzyasksme,andIlookatmycalendartobesureIdon’thaveanything
pressingsoIcanpickQuinnupfromtheairport.
“Yeah,that’sgoodwithme.DidyourunitbyQuinn?”
“Idid,she’llbeabletoleaveworkearly.”Mydadpopshisheadin,workingoutofouroffice
allweek,andtomysurprise,he’sbeenprettycool.
“Quinncominghere?”
“Sheis—Friday.”
“Allright.Well,Ishouldbegettingthedraftbackofthedocuments.Iwantedtogooverthem
withyouwhentheycomeinifyouhavetime.”
“Ofcourse.I’llhavetime.”
“Great,I’llhaveSuzyaddittoyourcalendarassoonastheycomein.”
“Thanks,Dad.”Myphonerings,andwebothglancedownatitonmydesk.It’sQuinn.“I’lllet
youtakethat,”hesays,andasheleaves,Ican’thelpbutthink,maybenowhe’sbecomingthefatherI
lostallthoseyearsago.
“Hey,babe,”
“Guesswhat?”
“Ummm,Ihavenoidea,justtellme.”
“IgotusticketstotheNuggetsgamenextweekend.”
“Again?”
“Yep,samecourtsideseatstoo.”
“Man,howdidIgetsoluckytosnagyourfineass?”
“Icouldsaythesamething.”Myphonevibrates,andIpullitaway,noticingatextfrommydad.
“Hangon,babe.”
“‘Kay.”
AsIopenitup,it’savideo.ThewholeworldaroundmefreezesasIclick“play.”Betrayallike
noothertakesover,andIcan’tbelievemyeyes.It’sQuinnandmydad…together.
Vomit rises in the back of my throat, and I try to hold it back, but as I watch the woman I’ve
growntolovehavesexwithmyownfather…Iloseit,gaggingandthrowingupinmytrashcan.
I drop my phone to the floor, her voice as she says his name sounds just like when she says
mine,andIdon’twanttobelievewhatI’mseeing.Itcan’tbetrue…canit?
“Mr.Smith,areyouokay?”Suzyasks,andIshakemyheadholdingontothecan.“Closethedoor,”I
shout and right away she does. Pulling myself together enough to speak, I pick my phone back up;
Quinnisstillthere,andIaskher,“Whenwereyougoingtotellme,orwereyou?”
Verycalmlyshesaystome,“Youhavetoletmeexplaineverything.”
“Explain?There’snothingtoexplain.Youliedtome.”
“Ididn’tmeanto.”
“Goddammit,howdoyouaccidentlylietosomeone,Quinn?”
She sobs, and as much as I just want to hang up on her, I have to know more. How? Why?
When?“You’vegottatalktome,Quinn,orI’mgonnafuckinglosemymind.Myfatherjustsentmea
videoofyouhavingsexwithhim,andit’sallIcanthinkabout.”
“He was in Denver for a meeting way before I knew you. I met him when I was out having
drinkswithsomeco-workers.”
“Soyousleptwithhim?Amandoubleyourage?”
“I’msosorry,baby.”
“AmIdreaming?”AndIask,“Isheyourex?”
“Yes. He’s the one you emailed, but you have to believe me that I didn’t know you two were
related.”Whatthefuck?AmIhearingherright?
“Mydad?”Irepeatsoftly;tearsareinmyeyesandthatvilefeelingofdespairreeksinsideof
me.Closingmyeyes,theusualbeautifulvisionofherface—thatnotlongagowasmysalvation—has
beendestroyed.AllIcanseeisherandmyfather.
“I’msosorry,Merritt.Ihadno—”
Icutheroff,“Wehavethesamelastnameandworkforthesamecompany.Howdidyounot
know?”
“Ididn’teventhinkaboutthelastname…Smithissocommon.AndyouknowIkeptmyhands
outofthedealwhenIsignedhim.Youhavetobelieveme,Merritt.Ipromise,baby.”
“Butyousleptwithhim,Quinn,andthensatatbreakfastinCaliforniaandactedlikeeverything
wasnormal,likeyoutwowerestrangerswhenhe…he’sbeeninsideofyouandthenIwasinsideof
you.HowamIsupposedtogetpastthat?”Sayingthewordsmakesmefuckingillagain.
“Idon’tknow,”shesays,andIdon’tknoweither…Ican’tbewithsomeonewhowouldlieright
tomyface.Acoincidenceornot,shewasn’thonestaboutthis,sowhatelsehassheliedtomeabout?
“Ican’tbewithyouanymore.”
“Please,don’tdothis.Youhavetobelieveme.Iloveyou,Merritt,”shebegsmeandherwords
sickenme,howcansheevensaythatoraskmethat?
“Ifuckinglovedyoutoo,andyouruinedthat.Goodbye,Quinn.”Pressingtheendbuttononmy
phoneisthehardestthingI’veeverdone.I’velosthalfofmyself.WhatIthoughtwasthegoodhalf,
my Quinn, was all a lie, and my dad, how could he? Getting up, I roll up my sleeves and storm
towardshisoffice,readytomakehimpay.Hedidn’tneedtosendmethevideo;hecould’vetoldme,
mantoman.Andshehadevenmorechancestotellme.
Myinsidesareamess.Acompletefuckingmess!Angerfillsme,everythingthatIoncethought
wasmyfoundationandIcouldcountonhasallbeenalie.Iftheycouldkeepthisfromme…whatelse
aretheyhiding?
Chapter41
Quinn
Haveyoueverfeltlikeyouweredead?Likepartofyoudied,andinsideofyounowthereisahuge
gaping hole? As I lie on my couch, my arm hanging off it, dangling over the soft carpet, that is
exactlyhowIfeel…dead.
Part of me died when Charles sent the video to Merritt. I underestimated Charles, which was
ultimatelymybiggestmistake.Ishould’vecomecleanwithMerrittinCaliforniaandbeenopenwith
him.Ishould’vefollowedmygut,evenifithurthim,andI’llalwaysregretthatmost.Itwasmyone
chancetosaveus,andIdidn’tdothat.
There’saknockonmydoor,andIgetuptoletWillowin.Shedidn’tneedtodrivealltheway
uphere;ItoldherIwasfine.Butshewasworriedaboutme,andIguessI’ddothesameifshewere
going through what I am. “How are you doing?” she asks me, as I flop back down flat on my face
beforeshecanevengivemeahug.
“I’mokay,”Igrumble,myvoicecrackingbecausemythroatissodryandIhaven’ttalkedfor
days.
“Youdon’tlooklikeit.Whenwasthelasttimeyouateordrankanything?”
Ishrugmyshoulders,andshetakesaholdofthemsittingmeup,“Goddammit,Quinn,snapout
ofit,you’rescaringme.”
“I’mfine.Iatelastnight!”
“Good.Nowyouneedtogetyourassupandtakeafuckingshower.Youstink.”
“Idon’tstink,”ItellherandsmelltheshirtI’mwearing—Merritt’sshirt.Itstillholdshisscent
andinstantlybringstearstomyeyes.IsoblikeI’vebeendoingfordaysnow,somehowmybodystill
producing the tears. Willow holds me and lets me be, the feeling of her arms around me, anyone’s
armsaroundme,issoreassuring.GivingmehopethatI’mgoingtobeokay.
“Comeon,let’sgetyouinthebath.”
Following Willow, I feel wobbly, but she won’t take no for an answer. As I strip naked, the
smelloflavenderfillstheair,remindingmeofthelasttimeItookabath.Itwasinhere…withMerritt.
Tears again consume me, and as she helps me into the bath, my teeth chatter, and she says, “Even
thoughyoudon’twanttotalkaboutwhathappenedagain,Ireallythinkitwouldbegoodtogetitall
offyourchest.”
SinkingasfardownintothetubasIcan,tryingtowarmmyself,Iknowshe’sright.Idon’twant
totalkaboutwhathappened.AfterMerrittbrokeupwithme,Iwasamessandcouldbarelymakeit
home from work. Right away, I called Willow, and she talked me through things and has been
checkinginonmeeveryday.She’salsotryingtogetmetotalkaboutwhathappened…butIcan’t.
“HasArisaidanythingtoyouabouthim?”Iaskher,hopingshe’sheardsomethingandthathe
isokay.
“No,hehasn’t.”
“Okay.”
“Areyounotgoingtotalktomeaboutit?”
“Whatdoyouwantmetosay?”Isnapatherandhereyesgetwide.
“Ineedtoknowhowitwaspossible.”
“Howwhatwaspossible?”
“Thatyoudidn’tknowMerrittwasCharles’son.”
“DoyouthinkI’mlying,Willow?”Iquestionherandsitallthewayup,suddenlyoffended.
“No,honey,notatall.ButifIknowhow,thenmaybeIcanhelpandtalktoMerrittforyou.”
“Thereisnotalkingtohim.IliedwhenIfoundout,andhesawavideoofmewithhisdad.”
“Ohshit.Butatthetimeyoudidn’tknowhewashisdad?”
“Ofcoursenot,Itoldyouthat.Ididn’tevenknowMerrittexistedwhenIwaswithCharles.His
dadismyex,Willow,plainandsimple.Ialreadytoldyouallofthis,”Igetagitatedeasily,feelinglike
everyoneisagainstme.
“Calmdown;Ijustwanttounderstandhowyoudidn’tknowtheywererelated.”
Ishakemyhead.Mybestfriendevidentlydoesn’tbelieveme,anditmakesmesick.Outofall
peopleintheworld,IthoughtIcouldatleastdependonher…butIguessnot.
Chapter42
Merritt
Copingwithbetrayalnevergetseasier.Itseemsdeathiseasiertoprocess.Youfindpeaceinknowing
theonesyou’velosthavegoneontoabetterplace.Butwithbetrayal,theonesyoulostandeveryone
involvedseemtoconsumeyourmindremindingyouofwhatthey’vedone.
Myfather,forstarters,isafuckingbitchandsetitallup.HeknewQuinnwascallingme,itwas
theperfecttimetoruinus,andthenheskippedout,andIhaven’tspokentohimsincehesentmethe
video.
Igetwhymydaddidit.Whyhewantedtohurtme,eventhoughtherestoftheworlddoesn’t
know,andwhenIwentintohisofficetoconfronthim,hewasgone.Ofcoursehewas—he’safucking
coward.Ishould’veknownhe’druinmylifeonewayoranother.He’snotevenmyrealfather,asfar
asDNAgoes.Mymothercheatedonhimandhadme,andheactedlikeIwashis,butdeepdownhe
alwaysdespisedme.ThelossofmymomwassotremendousthatIthoughtIowedittonotjusthim,
buther,tostickbyhim.Iwasmakingupforhermistakeallalongwhenitwasn’tmyplace.
Sittingoutonmybackdeck,mymindkeepsspinningthesamewayithasbeenfordays,andI
can’tshakethethoughtthatthiswasallasetup.Imean,howcoulditbeacoincidence?
Hell,maybeAriisinonittoo.Heandmyfathercouldbetryingtopushmeoutofthebusiness.
He was always my father ’s favorite, until he left, but maybe it was just a show. The same way
everythingbetweenQuinnandIwas…justashow.
Pickingupmyphone,IdialAri.Ihavetoknow;didhesetthisallup?Didheknowallalong
thatQuinnhadbeenwithmyfather?
Hedoesn’tanswer,whichisnotlikehim,butcometothinkaboutit,Ihaven’tbeenabletoget
aholdofhimmuchlately.
CallingSuzy,sheanswersrightaway,stillattheoffice.“Hi,Mr.Smith.”
“Hey, I’m glad you’re still there. You have Natalie’s calendar access for when she’s gone,
right?”Natalieismyfather ’sassistant,andifIcan’tgetaholdofAri,Icanatleastconfrontmydad.
“Yes,sir,Ido.”
“Couldyoulookatmydad’scalendarandtellmeifhehasanydinnermeetingstonight?”
“Um,hedoesfromsix‘tileightatSheaRouge,butI’mnotsurewhoit’swith.”
“Awesome,that’swhatIneeded.”
Ihangupwithher,gratefultohaveherhelp.SheaRougeisintown,whichmeansmydadisstill
here.Grabbingmycarkeys,Imakethetripacrosstownandvalet.
Walkinginsidetheupscalerestaurant,theatmosphereinhereiscalmandrelaxed.It’srighton
thewater,andtherearetonsofboatsdockedatthemarina.Takingaseatatthebar,thebartenderasks
me,“WhatcanIgetya?”
“I’lltakeawater,please.”
Ineedtobeclear-headedandonmytoes,ifmygutisright.Lookingaround,thesunissetting,
but outside, I spot my father and…Ari. They are deep in conversation, laughing and enjoying each
otherliketheyarebestfriends.AndimmediatelyI’mawaretheyareworkingagainstme.Pullingout
my cell phone, I dial Ari. He looks down at his ringing phone and ignores my call, sending me
straighttohisvoicemail.
Leaving the water I ordered on the bar, I head towards them. My father laughs and places his
handonhisshoulder,andIpulloutachair,sittingdown,shockingbothofthemwithmypresence.
“Merritt,” my dad smiles a devilish grin, and for the first time ever, I acknowledge him as,
“Charles,”andthenturntogreetthelatestadditiontothelistofpeopleInolongertrust,“Ari.”
“Wewerejustgonnacallyou,”Arisays,likeafuckingpussy.
“Really,‘causeIjustwatchedyouignoremyphonecall.”
Theylookateachother,andthenmydad,orshouldIsayCharles,putshishandsupandsays,
“Okay,yougotus.Wewereplanningapartyforyouwhenyoutakeoverthecompany.”
“Fuckyouboth.”Charlessmiles,andIaskthem,“Sowasthisyourplanallalong?Tofuckme
outofthebusinessI’veworkedmyentirelifefor?”
“Let’sbehonest,Merritt,youwerenevercutouttorunthecompany,notthewayAriis.”
“Sowhynotfiremethen,youfuckingpussy?”
“Becausewhenyouleaveonyourown,I’mdonewithyouandneitherofusispayingyouacent
more.”
“Neitherofus?Hedoesn’tevenworkforyou.”
“Oh,buthedoes.He’sbeendoingplentytomakethisthebiggestmergerinthehistoryofthe
Americanoilandgasindustry.”Ariwon’tevenlookatme.Thebitchbetrayedmeandnowisn’tman
enough to own up to it. It all makes sense now, the drama with the Serranos, the stocks, the deal in
Steamboatmydad“offeredamilliondollarsmorefor.”Itwasallforhisbenefit,andtheyplayedme.
“Ari left so when he takes over the company, he can bring Azures’ business too. I didn’t build this
empiretoturnitovertosomemistakeofachildandnothaveitbethelargestoilandgascompanyin
theworld.”
“Fuckyouboth.You’remeantforeachother,youknowthat?”
“Oh,lookatyougettingallhurt.Whydon’tyourunalongtothatslutItookadvantageof.I’m
sureshe’llstillwantyoubecausewe’refuckingdonewithyou.”
IignoremyfatherandlookatAri,andhefinallybringshiseyestomeetmine.“Isitalltrue?”
Henods,andeventhoughIknewitwas,havinghimconfirmitisaterribleblow.“WhyQuinn?Why
bringherintoallofthis?”
“It was easy, man,” Ari says. “I knew you’d fall for her as soon as I put you two in that
bedroom.Justlookather.Youbothwerefuckingpuppets.”Standingup,Ilayahardrighthookinto
his face. His chair flies backwards with him in it, and Charles sits stunned, looking at me as Ari
stumblestohisfeet,obviouslywobbled.Theguestsalllookinourdirection,andItellmydad,“He’s
your fucking problem now. Just feel lucky I don’t do the same to you. I’d probably kill your frail
ass.”
Iwalkoff,lookingbackatArionelasttime.He’shalfconscious.Ireallyshouldmopthefloor
withbothofthem.ThenewsofwhatQuinndidisreallynothingcomparedtothisbetrayal.
Chapter43
Quinn
Lookingat my computerscreen, I’m notsure how I’m goingto get throughthe entire day. Willow
recommendedIcomebacktowork,andatthetime,Ithoughtitwasagoodidea.Butsittinghere,the
faintsmelloftheflowersMerrittsentmestillwaftingintheair,loomingfrommytrashcan,andIjust
can’tstopstaringatthepictureofusonmycomputerscreen.
God, it hurts. It’s the most excruciating pain I’ve ever dealt with, and I want it to go away.
Lookingdownatmybracelet,theoneheboughtforme,Ipopitopenandtakeoutthetiny,tattered
pieceofpaper.AsIunfoldit,theinkhasfaded,butstillfaintlyvisibleishisname,Merritt.Whatwas
awishofminenotsolongago,nowwillnevercometrue.
Throughasob,Ichokebackthetearsanddropitintomytrash.I’vegottolethimgo…Ihave
to.
“Quinn,”thereceptionistcallsthroughmyphone,almostmakingmejumpoutofmyskin.
“Yeah.”Itryandsoundsomewhatnormal.
“Yourninethirtyisintheconferenceroom.”
“Okay,”Ianswerback,caughtoffguard.Idon’thaveacluewhomyninethirtyisorwhattodo
aboutit.Goingintomycalendar,Iwaitforittoloadandit’stakingforever.
Goddammit!
GrabbingmyiPadsoIcansearchthecompanynameifneededandflybytheseatofmypants,I
makemywayacrosstheofficeandstopatthedoor,swallowingandtakinginabreathofairbeforeI
goinandputonafakehappypersona.
ButasIopenitandstepin,thewindisknockedfrommylungsandIfreeze.Everythingaround
me slows. My senses that weeks ago died suddenly come back alive breathing him in, and I stand
unabletomove.
Merritt is sitting at the head of the conference table, his brown eyes hard to read. Why is he
here?Hehatesme.TheninthatcommandingvoicethatI’lldoanythingfor,heordersmetoclosethe
door.
GentlyIdoandtakeaseatacrossfromhim,preparedforthewrathofwhatisnext.Infrontof
himisafolder.I’msureit’sofmorepicturesorsomethingthathisdadsenthim,andIbegintofeelas
thoughIcouldhyperventilate.
“Howareyou?”heasks.
Inod,stillnotspeaking,andhesays,“It’sgoodtoseeyou.”
“You too.” My voice trembles; this is harder than I ever imagined it would be. He opens the
folderandhandsmeapieceofpaper.“What’sthis?”Iasklookingdownattheblankwhitesheet.
“Youtellme,whatdoyousee?”
“Nothing,”I’mconfused,butlately,that’sallIam.
“Iseesomethingdifferent.”
Iflipitover,thebackisblanktoo,andItellhim,“I’msorry,butmybrainismushlately.”
“Pleasedon’tbesorry,Quinn.”Hearinghimsaythosewordswhenthat’sallIshouldbemakes
me cry. Why is he doing this? “I see a blank page with nothing but possibility on it.” He slides me
overapenandtellsme,“Ifyoucouldhaveanythinginthisworld,whatwoulditbe?”
I write the word you, very small, knowing he’s got to just be playing a game with me. It’s
payback, I’m sure, but being in his presence, I can’t deny what I want. There is no way he’ll ever
forgivemeorlookatmethesameway,howcouldhe?Icanbarelyforgivemyselfforlyingtohim.
Ipasshimbackthepaper,andheopensthefolder.Insideisanotherone,andinhisverylarge
handwritingistheword,YOU.
Readingit,itishardtobelieve.Tearsfillmyeyes,andhesaystome,“Iknowyouhadnoidea
myfatherandIwererelated,and…Iforgiveyoufornottellingmeassoonasyoufoundout.That
must’vebeenahardmomentforyou.”
“Whywouldyouforgiveme?”Iask,needingtoknowhisreasoning.
“Becauseyouweresetup,andsowasI.”
“Whatdoyoumean?”
“CharlesandArihavebeenworkingtogethertopushmeoutofthebusiness.Fromthemoment
youmetmydad,itwasallpartofaplantogetridofme.”
“Whatthefuck,why?”
“IguessbecauseI’mnothisson,”hetellsme,therevelationisagiantsurprise.Asheexplains
further, it all makes sense, but understanding how Ari had a hand in it all doesn’t add up. “But you
boughtAri’sstocksandgavehimthemoneyforthem.”
“It’sallsuchashame.I’velivedandbreathedforthatcompanysinceIwaseighteenyearsold,
andallalongbothofthemwereworkingagainstme.”
“IgetwhyCharlesdidit,butwhyAri?”
“We’veallgotaprice,somemorethanothers.Ariwaswillingtogivehissoultothedevilin
exchangeforanoverinflatedcompanythatlikelywon’tlastadecadebeingrunthewaythosetwodo
things.”
“Idon’tknowwhattosay,Merritt.”I’matalossforwords,completelytakenbysurprise.I’ve
knownAriforyears;he’slikeabrothertome.“DoesWillowknow?”
“Nooneknows,baby,butus.”
“Don’tcallmethat.”
“Why?”hescoffslikeI’vecompletelyoffendedhim.
“BecauseIcan’tgetmyhopesup;I’mbarelyabletofunctionasitis.”
“Quinn,didyouordidn’tyouwritethisonthispaper?”HeholdsupwhatIwrote.
“Youwatchedmewriteit.”
“Didyouordidn’tyouknowCharleswasmyfather?”
“IsweartoGod,Ihadnoidea.”
“Thenplease,let’sgetbacktowherewewere.”
“ButIliedtoyou.”
“Because you played into them. They put you in the worst spot imaginable. I’ve lost almost
everything,Quinn;Iwillnotloseyoutoo.Doyouunderstandme?”
Inod,holdingbackthetearsthebestthatIcan,andhestands,“Getup.”
IlistenrightawaylikeIalwaysdo.Hestepstome,andIwaitasifthisisalladreamthatsoonI
will wake from. But as he places his palms against my face, I have found my place again. “Quinn
Whitmore,Iloveyou,morethananythinginthisentireworld.”
His lips find mine before I can speak the words back to him. He tastes like heaven, igniting
everything inside of me, bringing me back to life. The gaping hole I’ve lived with slowly closes. I
lovehim,Ilovehimtoo,morethananything.
Chapter44
Merritt
“Aretheyclosed?”Quinnasksmewithhertinyhandaroundmineasshewalksmedownanunsteady
surface.
“Yes,Ipromise.”
“Youbetternotbelying.”
“I’mnot.”
Westop,andshesays,“Stepupagain.”Ilistentohervoice,notknowingwherewearegoing,
but knowing that I’d follow her into the depths of hell if she wanted. For Christ’s sake, we’ve been
thereandbackandsurvived,sothere’snotmuchthatcouldbringusdownnow.
“Okay,open‘em!”
“Surprise!”asmallintimategroupofourclosestfriendscheers.
“Happybirthday,baby,”Quinnsays,stillholdingmyhandandIkissher.It’smybirthdayandas
much as I wasn’t looking forward to it, seeing as what I’ve gone through lately, she still made it a
greatcelebration.
“Whoseboatisthis?”Iaskher,andshesays,“Myboss,”whocomesupandshakesmyhand.
“Happybirthday,Merritt,it’sgreattoseeyouagain.”
ImethimthedayQuinnandIgotbacktogether.LookingaroundInoticeKamiandJacoband
Willow and Ted. “Happy birthday,” Willow says, hugging me, a glimmer of pain still in her eye
becauseofwhatAridid.Shefeelsbad,butit’snotherfault.Hell,it’snoone’sfault,buttheirown,and
theygotwhatwascomingtothem.AfterIthoughtlongandhardaboutdevisingaplanofpayback,I
soldmystockstoExlon,becauseCharleshadweaseledoutoftheleasedealImadewiththem.OnceI
foundouthegiftedthemsomestocksasacopout,Iknewitwasmyonlywaytogetbackathim.He
hadnoideaI’dgotothem;hewasblindsided…alotlikeIwas.
ButafterwhatIwentthrough,IwasonestepaheadofCharles.Forthefirsttimeinmylife,Ihad
oneuponhim.Withmystocks,Ari’soldonesIbought,andtheoneshe’dgivenExlon,theyhada
fifty-onepercentownershipinCharles’company.
WhenExlonsenttheirteamin,seeminglytojoininasapartnership,itdidn’ttakethemlongto
uncovertheyearsofdeceptionCharleshadskillfullyconducted.Immediatelytheykickedhimtothe
curb, indicting him for embezzlement. I knew Charles had always skewed the books, I just never
thoughtIcoulduseitagainsthim.
For Ari, he made his own bed with Azures. They handled him the same way my father was
handled.Theyreallyaretwopeasinapod.Maybeoneday,they’llbetwopeasinthesameprisoncell.
“Yougood?”Quinnasksme,handingmeaglassofchampagne.Comingbackintothemoment,
IpulloutofthedazedandcloudedmindfuckIfindmyselfgettingeasilylostin.
“Neverbetter,baby.Neverbetter.”
Lettingherleadmearoundtheboataswesailoffintothenight,wevisitwithallofourfriends
andfamily.AllofwhomshehasarrangedtobehereinDenver.Ihaven’tbeenbacktoTexassince
QuinnandIgotbacktogether,andIdon’tseemyselfevergoingback.MyphoneringsandIpullit
outofmypocket.
“Hello?”Ianswer.
“Merritt,it’sJohn.”
“Ohhey,John.Howarethegirlsdoing?”
“They’reallright.I’malittleworriedaboutTink—thevetcameforavisittoday,andshehas
desmitisinherfrontleftleg.”
“Really?How’dthathappen?”
“Shemust’vebeenoverworkingit.”
“Howcanitbefixed?”
“She’ll need to take it easy for a while; we won’t be able to bring her to Colorado like we’d
planned,notatleastuntilshe’sbetter.Butwithsometimeandmedicine,sheshouldbegood.”
“Iunderstand,thankyouforlettingmeknow.”
Ihangupwithhim,andQuinnisconcerned,“Whatdidhesay?”
Ifillherin,andIcanseetheworryonherface.“Wecangobackthereandlookforaplacein
Texas.”
“No, I don’t want to be away from you, and your job is here. She’ll be good.” She’s got an
angelinmymomwatchingoutforher.
“Thankyouforthis,baby,”Itellher,lookingaroundatallthepeopleclosesttous.Shesmiles
looking up at me with her big dark blue eyes, and I hold the side of her face, leaning down and
kissingher.Herlipsaresosoft,remindingmeofthefirsttimeweeverkissed,ontheskislope,and
still to this day, that same spark lives inside me. Who knew a week unplugged from the world, that
wasasetuptoruinusboth,couldturnouttobethegreatestthingthat’severhappened?
Epilogue
Merritt
1yearlater
“Areyoudoneyetinthere,mysexywife?”IyelltoQuinnassheisfinishingupthelastofherwork.
Sincewegotmarried,shelikesitwhenIcallhermywife.
“I just finished,” she struts outside so gorgeous, all sexy, and sits on my lap. “How’s my
husband?”
“Betternow,”Iholdherwarmbody,closetomine.Weareonthefrontporchofourhomein
theRockyMountainsofColorado,andthistimeofyeartheweatherisgorgeous.BellandTinkgraze
onthefiftyacresoflandthatweown,andsincewemovedthemhere,theyareinheaven.Tink’sleg
hasbeengreat,theybothseeminbetterhealth.Icredittheelevation.
“Youknow,weprobablydon’tevenneedtobuyhayanymore,”Itellheraswewatchthemeat,
andshesaystome,“Youarenotabouttostarvemygirls.”
“Theyarefarfromstarved,howdoyouthinktheyliveinthewild?Youthinksomesexylittle
ladyhandfeedsthemcarrotsandhayeverydayoutthere.”
“Idon’tcareaboutthewild,that’showIdothingshere,inourhouse,andourlife,andweare
goingtokeepfeedingthemhay.”
“Jesus,itwasjustanoption.”
Shegrinsandcupsthesideofmyface,stilllookingoutattheviewassherubsmeandIaskher.
“Workgood?”
“Itwas.”
“Yougetanythingdonetoday?”
“Nope.”
Afterweagreedtomoveupheretogether,shedidn’twanttoleaveherjob,sotheyareallowing
hertoworkoutofthehouseafewdaysaweek,whichkeepsherbusy.I’dratherherdonothing,butI
getthatshewantstowork.I,however,amdone.Iwillneverworkanotherdayinmylife.Ihavemore
thanenoughmoneytotakecareofusforever.
“What’sfordinner?”sheasksmeastheovendingsaswewanderinside.Ialwayscookforher,
andshelovesit.
“Spinachlasagna,”Itellher,takingoutthehotheapingpanofit.
“Smellsgood.”Iserveusbothplatesasshepoursuswineandthenshesaystome,“Youknow,
onceI’mpregnant,I’mgonnamisswine.”
“Thedoctorsaidyoucanhaveaglasseveryonceinawhile.”
“Isitsafe,though?”
“I’msureitis,orhewouldn’thavesaidthat.”
Sittingdowntoeat,hereyesareonmine,andIcan’tbelievethisiswhatmylifehasbecome.
Fromhavingacrazyobsessivedrivetoownmyowncompany,tonowbeingcontentwiththelittle
thingsinlife.It’sacompleteone-eighty,andIcouldn’tbehappier.
“DidItellyouthatStanofferedtosplittheseasonticketstotheNuggetsgamesnextseason?”
“Really?Wait‘tilItellTed.”
“Noway,”shescoffsatme.
“Comeon;thatwasaone-timething.”ThelasttimeTedandIwenttoagametogether,wegota
littledrunkandcrazyand…youcanguesstherest.
“Itbetterhavebeen,becausenexttimeI’mnotbailingyourassoutofjail.”
“Peeinginpublicreallyshouldn’tbeillegal,I’mjustsaying.”ShehitsmeonthearmasIpull
herontomylap.Herfaceissohappyintheeveninglight.Ilovetoseehersmile;it’swhatIworkfor
everyday.
Reachingdown,Icuphersex.Hergringetsbigger,andIcan’twaitanylonger.Liftingherup,I
take her into our bedroom, tossing her down on the plush fabric of our comforter. She giggles, a
soundIdependgreatlyupon.
“Getyourhat,”shetellsmeasIpullmyshirtoffovermyhead.
“Doyouhaveafetishforcowboys?”IaskherinmybestSouthernaccent.
“Yes,tattooedcowboys,”shetellsmeandstripsnaked,lyingtheresowillingandready.“ThenI
bettergrabmywhip.”
Takingitfromtheclosetalongwithmyhat,Ifindherkneeling,pantingformydick.“Youmiss
me?”Iaskherandstrokemyself.
“Uhhuh.”
“Youwannasuckmycockclean?”
“Yes,sir.”
“IfIletyousuckme,areyougonnamakemecome?”
Shestopsmefromplayinganddivesin.Wrappingthosetight,tightlipsaroundme.Igrunt,as
loudasIwant,pummelinghermouth.Takingthewhip,Itrailitoverherskin,lovinghowitpricks
beneaththetipoftheleather.
Pullingback,Ilandahardsmackonherass.Shemoansandsucksmefaster.“Touchyourself,”
Itellher,lookingtothesideasshekneelsthereandplayswithherpussy,lettingmefuckhermouth
sogood.
Ihitheragain,andshewhimpersformore.Sherubsherpussyfaster,pushingmesocloseto
theedge,butIholdon,notgivingovertoheryet.
Pulling out of her mouth, she kneels panting for me, and I place the handle of my whip in
betweenherteeth.“Youknowwhathappensifyoudropthis,right?”
She nods and I spread open her ass and pussy, so tempted to go right where I’ll end up, but
waitingbecausewehaveapurpose.
Slidinginsideofhertightwetslit,myballsswell,sohornyforherbentoverlikethis.Ineedto
blow.Theruleis,shedropsthewhipandIfuckherass.WhichwillhappenassoonasIcome,because
herasshasbecomebothofourfavorites.Shecancomeagainandagainfrommefuckingit,butwe
aretryingtohaveababy,andthatmeansshe’sgottaletmecomeinherpussyfirst.
Fuckingherhard,shewhimpersfromthefullness,andIrubherclit.Shearchesupwards,her
backagainstmychestasshecoaxesmeonthroughgrittedteeth.“Yes,fuckmeharder.”
“Oh,youlikeitrough.”
Ibarrelfasterandfaster,knowingthiscouldbeit.Thiscouldbethemomentwecreateachild,
andIholdherclose,knowingifitis,Iwillnotmakethesamemistakesthathavehappenedinmylife
with our kid. Cum shoots inside of her, and she screams, dropping the whip. I latch onto her neck,
lovingherandthesetimeswesharetogethermorethananythingelseinmylife.Isuckhardonthe
soft skin, teasing and biting her, knowing no one will see us for weeks. Up here we are unplugged
fromtheworld,alone,justthetwoofusinourownoasis.Aplacewe’vebuiltandcherished,aplace
whereI’vefalleninlovewithheralloveragain,andIhopethatinninemonths,itwillbethethreeof
us.
Acknowledgements
ThisbookisonlyarealitybecauseofsomanypeoplethatI’mnotsurehowtoproperlythank.So,
I’mgonnadomybesttotry.
William,yourundyingencouragementandvisionaroundthesestoriesmeanstheworldtome.
Thankyouforbeingthegreatest,husband,partner,andco-workeragirlcouldaskfor.Iloveyouto
themoonandback,baby.
To my grammatical team: Lisa, my amazing editor; Letica, Janice, and Denise, my fabulous
proofreaders,thatsavedmyassintheendonthisone;andmynewfoundBetaTeam.Youallhelpedto
moldandcreatethisstoryintoaworkofperfection.Thankyouforbelievinginme.
Last,butabsolutelynotleast:thereaders,reviewers,bloggers,andmyARCteam.Ihopeyouall
lovedQuinnandMerritt’sstoryjustasmuchasIadoredcreatingit.WhatIdoisforeachandevery
oneofyou—
thankyousovery,verymuchforyoursupport.
IfyoulovedUNPLUGGED,pleaseconsiderleavingareviewonAmazon—
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