UNPLUGGED

ThestoryofQuinn&Merritt

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TableofContents

Dedication

Crystal,thankyouforallthatyoudo.Thisone’sforyou,babe.

Chapter1

Quinn

Slowly, I creep up the snow-packed driveway, thankful that I have my new Jeep to navigate the

slipperyterrain.AsIputtheSUVinpark,Tedopensmydoor,hisadorablegreeneyessparklingin

thelastoftheeveningsunlight.

“Fancynewcaryougothere,”hesays.Tedismybestfriend,Willow’s,husband.

“Why,thankyou.Ididsignthebiggestclientmyofficehadthisyear.”HetakesmyhandasI

steadymyself,plantingtwofeetfirmlyontheicyground.Achillrunsthroughme,andIzipmycoat.

“God,it’scold.”

“Butbeautiful,”hesays,andwebothlookupattheshimmeringwhiteflakescomingdownhard.

“Comeon,let’sgetinside.”

I nod and open my rear door, handing him my bag. Then we walk up to the gorgeous winter

retreatthatWillow’sbrother,Ari,rentedfortheweek.Everyyearheputstogetheroneofthesetrips,

andit’swhatIlookforwardtomostinthewintertime.It’sthesamegroupofpeopleeveryyear,and

we’ve all become like family. Most of us went to college together and now meet to spend time

catchingup,skiing,andsnowboardingsomewhereintheRockyMountainsofColorado.It’snotfar

from where I live in Denver, and with how crazy my job and life can be at times, especially as the

holiday’sapproach,Icanalwaysusethetimeaway…thisyearinparticular.

TedandIkickthesnowfromourbootsasWillowandKamigreetusatthedoor.“OhmyGod!”

both girls exclaim. “You look so adorable,” Kami tells me and gives me a tight hug, followed by

Willow.

“Thisplaceisstunning,”Isaytothem.

“Isn’tit?Arididawesomethisyear.Comeon,letusshowyoutoyourroom.”

Kami’sboyfriend,Jacob,andAriarezonedoutontheTV,watchingsomesportsgame.“Hey

guys,”IsayasIwalkbyandtheybothnodtheirheadsfollowedbyasimultaneous,“What’sup?”

“Awesomeplace,Ari.Thankyou.”

“Noproblem,”hesays,stillfocusingontheTV,andthegirlsshowmearoundandthentakeme

upstairs.Asweheaddownthehall,it’sclearArihasthemaster;he’spayingafterall.

“So,hereyouare,”Willowsaysopeningthedoortotherustic-inspiredbedroom,withtwotwin

bedsmadeoutofrealtrees.MyroomisrightacrossfromherandTed,andnexttoKamiandJacob’s

room,sowe’reallsandwichedintogether.

“Wow,I’mtotallygonnafeellikealittlekidsleepinginhere,”ItellWillowandKami,asIplop

down on the couch in the room to take my boots off. My bag is already by the door. Ted is such a

sweetie.

“So,howareyouholdingup?”Willowasksme.

“I’mokay,”Itellher,thetearsalreadyprickingthebackofmythroat,andeventhoughItryand

pushthemaway,it’shard.Kamigivesmeahugehug,andthroughanexasperatedsigh,Isay,“I’mnot

evensurewhyI’mupset.”

“Breakupsarealwayspainful,babe.”

Andtheyare,eventhoughmyexandIwereonlytogetherforahandfulofmonths,itwasafast

andfuriousromance.He’sthatbigclientIsignedthroughmywork,andheliterallysweptmeoffmy

feet.Flyingmearoundeveryweekendtobewithhimaswetraveledallover,andIjustwentwithit.I

completelyletmyguarddownandintheprocessmademyselfvulnerable.Itreallywasanawesome

fewmonthsofmylife.UntilthedayhebrokeupwithmeforreallynoreasonthatIcouldsee.The

painofthinkingaboutitisstillsohardtohandle.Myrelationshipsalwaysseemtoendbadly,thisone

included,whichmakesmefeellikethereissomethingwrongwithme.I’mreallyhopingwiththistrip

Icanletitgo,evenifonlyforthisweek.

“Haveyouheardfromhimatall?”Kamiasks.

“No,thankGod.I’msurehe’smovedon,”Itellthegirls,andI’msurehehas.

“Well,Isayyouforgetallaboutthatdouchebag,”Willowsays,andIsmile,changingintoapair

ofsweats.

“I’dlovenothingmorethantoforgetabouthim.”

“What do you ladies say, let’s make this the best week ever? We are going to be completely

relaxed,calm,andunpluggedfromtheworld,okay?”Shelooksatmewiththatlook,andIknowwhat

shemeans.Itakemycellphonefrominsidemypurse.I’mreluctanttohandittoher…butI’maware

oftherulesonthesetrips…soIdo.

KamiandWillowhugme.Willowlooksintomyeyes,readingme,knowingmesodamnwell.

“Letitallgo,babe.Thisisafreshstart!”

“Iwill.Thankyoubothforpickingmyassup.”

“Ofcourse.Meetyadownstairs?”

“Yeah,I’mjustgonnausethebathroomrealquick.”

After I finish, I stare back at my reflection in the mirror. My dark blue eyes are tired and my

stragglycaramel colored hairis a mess.Christ, work really kickedmy ass thisweek. I never knew

managingotherpeople’smoneycouldbesomuchwork.NowthatI’vebeenpromotedtoInvestment

Advisorwithinahugefinancialfirm,IrealizehoweasyIhaditbefore.

ThesnowmademyhairsuchanunmanageablesnarlthatallIcandoisusethehairbandfrom

mywristtoholditinamessyponytail.

Mywoolsweaterlooksridiculouswithmygraysweats,soItakeitoff,thengoanddigthrough

mybagforsomethingmorecomfortableandlessitchytowear.OneofthethingsIloveaboutthese

tripsisjustbeingabletochillandrelaxandnotcarehowIlook.Ariislikeabigbrothertome,and

theotherguysaretaken,soIhavenoonetolookgoodfor.

Suddenlythedooropens.“Hereyouare,man,”Arisays,walkinginwithanunfamiliarguy,and

Iscrambletocovermybreasts.

“Whatthefuck,Ari?”Iyell,andbothheandthenewguygawkatme.Lookingbackathissexy

face,I’mnotsurewhattodo,soIstormintothebathroomandpullwhatevert-shirtI’mholdingover

myhead.ThenIstandtheretryingtodecideifIshouldwalkout.OrmaybeIshouldwaitforsomeone

toknock.Arisaid,“Hereyouare?”Whatdoeshemean?Thisismyroom!Whoisthatguy?

“Quinn?”Willowcallsoutandlightlyrapsonthedoor.Iopenit,andshesays,“Youokay?”

“I’mfine.Whatthefuckisgoingon,though?”

“I’m sorry, Ari invited a friend of his. They used to work together. He didn’t think he was

coming…buthe’shere.”

“Andhe’sstayinginmyroom?”

“Well,ifyou’reokaywiththat.Butifnot,Icanseeifhecansleeponthecouchorsomething?”

“No, don’t do that. I don’t want to cause any drama.” Ari puts this all together and is so cool

aboutpayingforeverything.“He’shisfriend;I’llbefine.”

“Areyousure?”sheaskswithafrownonherface.

“I’msure.”Wewalkoutintothebedroom.Ontheflooratthedooristheguy’sbag.Ifollow

Willowdownstairs,andasIlookaroundateveryone,Ispothimbullshittingwiththeguys.He’sgot

messy brown hair and muscles for days. He senses me coming down and looks at me, making my

heartthud.IglanceawaylikeIdidn’tnotice,butIcanfeelhiseyesstillonme.Hekeepstalkingtothe

guysbutwatchingme.

“Ineedadrink,”ItellWillow.Mynervesareshot,havingthetwoofthemwalkinonmelike

that.ThankfullyKamiismakingsomesortofconcoctioninthekitchen.She’sourresidentmixologist

—literally—sheworkedatahigh-endcocktailbarwhenwewereallincollege,andyoucanalways

countonhertomakethebestdrinks.

“Hereyouladiesgo,”shesays,passingussomefoofypinkdrinks.

“Hey,Merritt,youwantabeer,man?”Ariaskshim.

“Sure,”hesaysandwalksintothekitchen,stoppingrightnexttome.

Iswallow,sippingonmydrink,gazingoff,notsurewhyI’msonervous.Minusthefactthathe

sawmytits,Idon’tevenknowhim.

“Hey,I’mMerritt,sorryaboutearlier.”

“It’s all good.” I sip on my drink again as he extends his hand to me. I look down at it for a

momentandcompletelyclamup.“You’resupposedtoshakeit,”hewhispers,leaningintomyear.He

smellsgood,andhiswarmbreathonmyskinmakesmetightenmypussy.

Ichucklealittletomyself,thentakehishandinmine.“I’mQuinn,”Itellhim.

“It’snicetomeetyou,”hesays,hisbrowneyesdancinginthelowlightofthekitchen.

“Hereyougo,man,”Arisaysandhandshimabeer.“Youtwogetachancetomeetyet?”heasks

us.

“Yeah,” I respond, watching Merritt’s lips and the way they mold around the end of the beer

bottle,eyesstillwatchingme.God,Idon’tknowwhatitis,buthe’ssohotandalluringtome,whichis

thelastthingIneedrightnow.Ican’thelpbutthinkbythewayhe’slookingatmethatasmuchasI

wanted this week to be about myself and relaxing, he’s going to make that very hard—if not

impossible—toaccomplish.

Chapter2

Merritt

“Whatareyoudoing?”Willowasksme,inasternwarden-liketone.

Glancingupatherfrommyphone,alittleconfusedbyherquestion,“Jussssstworkin’alittle.”

“Ari,didyounottellhimabouttherule?”

Rule?

“Oh,Itoldhim,”hesays,grabbinganotherbeerfromthefridge,buthedefinitelydidn’ttellme

aboutanyrules.

“So,what,sincehe’syourfriend,you’regonnalethimkeepit?”

Keepwhat?

Arirollshiseyesathissister,andIreallyhavenocluewhattheyaretalkingabout.Tedleans

overandsays,“I’dgiveheryourphonenow,ifitwasme.”

Whatthefuck?

Willowoutstretchesonehandtome,withherotherplacedonherhip,andI’minshock.Isshe

forreal?I’mworkingonathreehundred-million-dollardeal,andshewantsmyphone?“I’llstayoff

it,”Itellherandplaceitinmypocket.

Theroomeruptsintochaos,everyoneyellingandarguing.Well,everyone,exceptforQuinn.

She’ssittinginherchairsmirking,sippingonherthirdpinkgirlydrink.Sounbelievablygorgeous

thatIcouldfuckher,righthereandrightnow,infrontofeveryone.Sheshrugshershouldersatme,

andIaskher,“Didyouhavetogiveyoursup?”

ShenodsandIlookattheceilingcontemplatingmyoptions.I’veneverbeenwithoutmyphone

—it’smylifelinetomyjob,andmyjobismylife,sotheygohandinhand.“CanIjustsendthislast

email?”IaskWillowandreachintomypocket,butshesnatchesitoutofmygriplikeit’sastackof

cash,andIgetupfeelinglikeI’mstuckinahousewithabunchofcrazypeople.Whycan’twehave

phones?AsIgrabanotherbeer,Arihollersovertome,“You’llbefine,man,trustme.”Ifliphimoff.

Outofeveryone,heshouldknowhowimportantmyphoneistome.

The girls all begin to clean up from dinner, and without my phone, I find myself watching

Quinn. And it’s not because she’s the only single girl here, it’s because I’ve never seen a chick so

confident.Wearingapairofsweatsandat-shirt,withherhairpulledup.

“Youknowyougotthatdealinthebag,”Arisays,bringingmebacktothemoment.

“Howdoyouknow?”

“I’veheardthroughthegrapevine,man,”hesays,andwhatAriknowsistypicallythetruthin

ourbusiness.

“Well, nothing’s done until it’s done. Plus, you know my dad will freak if I don’t close it. He

didn’tevenwanttoletmetakethisweekoff.”

“Fuckyouroldman.Yougottakeephimouttayourheadwhenyou’reworking.”

Inod,hearingAri’swords,butactuallylisteningtothemisanentirelydifferentthing.Mydad

ownsthecompanyIworkfor,whichisaveryprominentoilandgasbusinesswithofficesalloverthe

US.Ariusedtoworkforhimtooandlefttojoinacorporatevenue.NowIrunthewesternUS,and

thedealI’mworkingonistoexpandintoCanada,whichwouldmakeusoneofthetopthreelargest

USproducersofoilinNorthAmerica.Quinn’slaughechoesthroughthehouse,pullingmeoutofmy

mindfuckandbacktoher.

“So,what’sthedealwiththatchick,Quinn?”Iasktheguys.

“She’s Willow’s best friend, has been for years. She’s like family,” Ari says as Jacob is

shufflingadeckofcards.“Youpussiesbringyourwallets?”

AlthoughAriinadvertentlyleftoutthewhole“nocellphone”thing,hedidtellmeaboutthis.

Everynightisgamenight,mostofwhichinvolvesanactualcashpoolforthewinner.

“Yeah,letmegograbsomecash,”Icall,walkingupstairstogetmywalletoutofmybag.Igo

into the room I’m staying in and chuckle at the small beds. I didn’t notice them before. Probably

‘causeallInoticedwereQuinn’stits,butI’mnotsureifI’llevenfit.

Diggingthroughmybag,IfindmyiPad.

Fuckyeah!

Thetemptationistoogreattoresist,andItakeitintothebathroom.Ipoweritupandhopeit

getsserviceuphere.I’msureitwillifmyphonedid.Sureenough,itdoes,andasIscrollthroughmy

emails, I’ve already received six new ones, on a Friday night no less. As I begin to read them, I’m

startledbyQuinnasshebargesintothebathroom,andIfreeze,lookingatherinthereflectionofthe

mirror.

“Shit,I’msorry,”shesays,butsmirkswhensheseesmyiPad.

“It’sallgood.I…I…”Istall,notsurehowtoexplainmyself.SheandWillowaretight,soI’m

sureshe’sonhersidewhenitcomestothiswholenophonething.

She looks down at my iPad and says, “You better not let Willow catch you on that thing.”

Standingnexttome,shesetsasmallbagonthecounterandunzipsit.

“Icanleave,”Itellher.

“No, you’re fine. I mean, we are going to be sleeping together.” She takes out a contact lens

case,andIcan’tfocusonanythingelse,exceptforherwords.“Notlikethat,”shesays.Inod,going

backtofocusingonmyemail.Beingthisclosetoher,alone,hasmymindonotherthings.Goddamn,

shesmellssogood;she’sverydistracting.“What’ssoimportantonthereanyway?”

“Fuckingwork,”Itellher,andwhenIthinkaboutit,IrealizethatIhatethatitrunsmylife,butit

does,andI’mnotsurehowtochangethat.

“Whatdoyoudoforaliving?”sheasksme.

“I’minoilandgas.You?”

“Investmentadvisor.”Nice,she’sgotherprioritiesincheck,that’sforsure.

“So,nowifeorgirlfriend?”sheasksme.

“No,you?”

“Wifeorgirlfriend?”shegapesbackatme,holdingoneofhercontactsonherfinger.

“YouknowwhatImean.”

“No,thankGod.”

“What’sthatmean?”Iaskher,alittleoffendedbyherremark.

“Nothing,it’sjust…Iwaswiththisguyforabit,andheturnedouttobeatotalass.Let’sjustsay

itdidn’tendwellandleftasourtasteinmymouthwhenitcomestomen.”

“I’msorry,”Itellherassheslidesonapairofglasses.

“It’s all good, it’s not your fault. This vacation is not about the past, Merritt, it’s about

unwinding and letting go…” She trails off as her eyes get wide thinking about something, and I

wonderwhathappenedtoher.Whatdidherexdothatmadehersoanti-men?Sherecoversandlooks

down at my iPad, so I lock it. “I’m sure the whole no electronics thing seems crazy, but you really

should try it. Once you’re unplugged from the world, it’s refreshing.” She goes to leave the

bathroom, passing me close enough that I smell fresh rain and something else, the combination

comingfromherskinmakesmycocktwitch.Thenshelicksherlips—suchatease—andbreezespast

me.Herscentandhermouth,God,Ifuckingloveit,Iwantit.

Grabbingmywallet,IdropmyiPadinmybagandheadbackdownstairsforsomethingelseto

drink,somethingstronger,somethingthatwilltametheanimalinsideofmethatQuinnistempting.

Becauserightnow,forsomereason,thischickhasmyheadspinning,andIhavenocluewhy.Notthat

I’mcomplaining,‘causeshe’shotashell,andI’dlovetofuckher.Butshe’sfreshoffabreakupand

doesn’twantanythingtodowithmen.SoforonceI’llsparemyself.

Chapter3

Quinn

“Areyouguysready?”Kamiasksassheholdsuptheboxforsomenewgamethatshe’sbrought.The

guysallgripe,notlikingtobetaughtsomethingnew,butshequietstheircomplaintsbysaying,“Stop

it…you’veallplayedUNO,right?”

“Yeah,whenIwasinkindergarten,”Arigrumbles.Sheignoreshimandemptiesthecontentsof

theboxontothetable.Inthecenterofthecoffeetableisallofourcontributionstothepot,whichI

reallyhopeIwin.Lasttrip,Iwonfiveoutofthesixpots.

MerrittcomesintothelivingroomwithaglassofwhatlookslikeScotchoniceinhishand.He

mustreallyhatenothavinghisphone.

“YoumindifIsithere?”heasksme,andIshakemyhead,tuckingmyfeetfurtherunderneath

me.AsIleanonthearmofthecouch,Kamiisramblingaway,andIfindmyeyeswandering,taking

inglimpsesofMerritt.He’smuscular,butnottoobig,clean-shavenandhishairlookslikehejustran

hisfingersthroughit.Thesleevesofhisblackdressshirtarerolledup,andhisthighsarestraining

the fabric of his jeans. Biting my bottom lip, I look at his cock, and Jesus, it’s... “Any questions?”

Kamiasksus.Iblinkwildly,likeakidonthefirstdayofschoolthathasn’tacluewhattodo.

Merrittpassesmeablankcardandatinymarker,andIlookatit,perplexed.Peekingaroundthe

room,everyoneiswritingontheircards,andIwhispertoMerritt,“WhatdoIdo?”

“Writearuleorsomething.”

“Arule?”

“Yeah,likesomethingthepersonhastodothatpicksthecard.”

“Canitbeanything?”

“Ithinkso.”

“Whatdidyouput?”Iaskhim.

“I’m not telling; she said not to.” He covers his card, and I sigh in frustration. I have no clue

whattowrite.Theonlythingsthatcometomindarejustdirty.Whatiswrongwithme?Aseveryone

hands her back their cards, I go with it; no one will know I wrote it, right? Remove one piece of

clothing,jewelryexcluded.

Kamicollectsthecardsandthenpassesoutourhands.“God,Ifeellikeakid,”Aricomplains.

“Trustme,man,thisoneisfun,”Jacobchimesin.“IhadKamisuckingmycocktheothernight

oneveryotherhand.”Shehitshimonthebackofthehead,andwealllaughassheblushes,obviously

stillthinkingabouttheirgame.

OhGod,didsomeoneputacardlikethatinthere?

Asweworkaroundtheroom,playingatraditionalgameofUNO,Ibegintothinkthisisn’tso

bad,butmyeyesareonthelittlemachinethatsitsinthemiddleofthetablewhichhasourcardsall

insideofit,andIwonderwhat’llhappenwhenwehavetouseit.ThenWillowlaysdownacardthat

has a picture of the machine and grabs the lever. The entire room silences, telling me that no one

wroteanythingniceontheircards.

Asshespinsthetinyslotmachine-likedevice,wewaitforittostopandwhenitdoes,sheasks,

“Whatdoesthatmean?”It’sgotapictureofablankblackcardonitwithaquestionmark.

“Oh,thatonemeansyoupullacardanddowhateveritsays,”Kamitellsher.

“ButIthoughtyousaidthatwecouldchoosewhohadtodoit.”

“Ifitgivesyouthatoption,thenyeah.Butitdidn’t.”

“Justpullthecard,babe,”Tedtellsher,andreluctantlyshedoes,rollinghereyesandbeingall

dramatic.Withthecardinherhand,she’sjustlookingatit,notsayingaword.

“Whatdoesitsay?”Ifinallyask,hatingthesuspense.

“Makeoutwithanyoneintheroomforoneminute.”

“Whoputthatoneinthere?”Iask,andKamisays,“WereyoulisteningtoanythingIsaidatall?

Itoldyou,you’renotallowedtosay.”

WillowdropsthecardonthetableandgrabsaholdofthesidesofTed’sshirtasshewhipsher

hairaround.Igiggle,whatisshea1980’spornstar?Thensheclimbsontopofhislapandbeginsto

kisshim.AsIfinishmydrink,Merrittasksme,“Youwantanotherone?”

“Sure.”Hegetsup,andIfollowhimintothekitchen.“Didyouwritethat?”Iaskhim.

“No,Ithoughtyoudid.”

IsmirkandawkwardlylookatWillowwhoisstillgoingatitwithTed.Hishandsareonher

hips,thenKamiyells,“Time.”Andtheyslowlystop.

“Whowouldyoukiss,ifyoupulledthatcard?”Merrittasksme,refillingmyglass.

Sippingonmydrink,Ilookaroundtheroom,filledwithallofmyclosestfriendsandknowmy

optionsarelimited.Reallyit’sAriorMerritt,andAriislikeabrothertome,andIbetMerrittknows

that,sohe’sexpectingmetosayhim.Ilookupathim,andhewinksatme.Thatishiscard.

Sonofabitch!

“It’sahardchoicebetweenWilloworKami,maybeboth!”Hismouthdropsopen,andIstrutoff

tothecouch.WhenIsitdown,he’sstillstandingintheexactspotIlefthim,watchingme.

Heshakeshisheadwithasmirkonhisface.“SowhatdoIlaydown?”IaskasWillow’sblue

cardwiththemachineisonthetopofthedeck.

“You’vegottoeithermatchthepictureorcolor.”Lookingatmyhand,Ihaveonecardwitha

machineonit,butI’mnotabouttomakethatmove,notuntilIseewhatelsethesecrazyfuckershave

writtendown.Merrittsitsbackdownnexttome,andIlayabluesix,thenArilaysdownthedreaded

cardwiththefuckingwheelonitagain,andhespinsthemachine.Thistimeit’sgotthesameblank

blackcardwithaquestionmark,butit’ssurroundedbytinyarrows.“Thatonemeansyoucanchoose

anyonetopullacard,oryoucanyourself,”JacobtellshimandArilooksatMerritt.

“Forreal,man?”

“Yeah,whynot?”

Merritt grabs the machine and takes the top card out. I look over at it as he reads it. “Take a

tequilabodyshotoffanyoneintheroom…exceptyourself.”Heholdshisbreath,andIdothesame,

knowing he’s gonna pick me. He won’t pick one of the other girls. He might pick Ari to be funny,

althoughIsureashellhopehedoesn’t.AsIwait,theanticipationhasmequestioningthings.

“Quinn?”heasksmeandeveryonecheers.Irollmyeyesattheirresponseandtakehishandas

heleadsmeintothekitchen.Onthecenterofthehugeislandissomuchliquoryou’dthinkwewere

hostingafratparty.

Myheartisbeatingprofusely,andmystomachisinmythroat.Iglanceatthegirls,andtheyget

up,followingusforabetterlook.“Oh,comeon,youguys,”Icomplainastheyallcrowdaroundus.

Merrittpourstheshot,thengrabsalimeandthesalt.Nowthathehaseverythingheneeds,heturns

andzonesinonme,hiseyescarnal,likehe’sabouttoeatmealive…ortearmypantsoffandfuck

me.

Iswallownervously,andhelooksatmythroat,gentlyplacingthelimebackwardsinmymouth

beforeIcansayanything.IguessIdon’thaveachoiceonwhereheplacesthesalt.Hiseyesscanmy

body,andIswearhecanhearmyheartpounding,it’ssoloud.Withnowarning,heleansintomyneck

andlicksitslowly.Ikeeplookingoff,nervousasshit;likenotmakingeyecontactwithhimisgoing

tomakemeanylessturnedonthanIalreadyam.

He’snotgivingmeroomtobreatheandgrabsthesalt,pouringitonmelikeapro.Onceit’s

added,hebraceshisweightoneithersideofmeonthecountertop,thensays,“Lookatme.”Ipullmy

eyesawayfromtheceilingandzoneinonhim.Helplessunderhiscontrol,withthelimekeepingme

silent,hesmirks,smashinghisbodyagainstmine,thebulgeofhiscockpressingintome,andIabout

gasp.Thenhislipsareonmeagainashesuckshard,pullingupontheskinofmyneck.Thegirls

squeal,andIwanttowhimper,itfeelssogood,butIresist.

He knocks back the shot, and I about drop the lime as he comes in on me, giving me a little

nudgebeforehislipsbrushupagainstmine.EveryonehollersandIblushashadeIhaven’tinalong

time.RedderthanIthinkKamididearlierrememberingherUNOgamewithJacob.

Mendon’ttypicallydothistome.No,wait,theyneverdo.I’malwaysincontrol;it’showIget

themtolikeme,butwithMerritt,thecontrolInormallyhaveisstrippedawayasheownsit,suddenly

makingmequestioneverything.

Chapter4

Merritt

Takingthelimewedgeoutofmymouth,IwhisperintoQuinn’sear,“Wouldyoustillkissoneofthe

girls,now?”Sheshakesherhead,andeveryoneshufflesbacktothelivingroom,nothearingwhatI

saidtoher.Istillhaveherpressedupagainstthecounterwithmybody,completelymotionless.The

sexualtensionbetweenusisheavy.I’mnotsurewhatitisabouther,butshemakesmewantherlike

I’veneverwantedawomanbefore.

Ididn’tlikehowshetoldmethatshe’dkissagirloverme.Andtomostguysitwouldprobably

beaturn-on,butnotme,notwhenIwantsomeone.Idon’tshare.

Oureyes still lockedon each other ’s,she knocks back aswig of thetequila straight from the

bottleandgrabsanotherlime,bitingintoit.Thejuicessquirt,landingonmycheek,andIchuckleat

heroutburst,backingoff,releasingher.Immediately,shedartsbacktothecouch,andIhavetogive

mycockamomenttogodown.Hertightassissohotjigglingbeneathhersweatpants.

Feelingsatisfied,Irefillmyglassandsitbackdownnexttohersowecancontinueourgame.

Asturnbyturngoeson,thecardskeepgettingworse.Thesepeoplewrotesomefuckedupshit

down.Oneofthecardssaystoremoveapieceofclothing,andasIlookatQuinn,withbothofher

feetbare,Ican’twait‘tilshepicksthatcardagain,‘causeshe’sgonnahavetotakeoffeitherherpants

orshirt.

“UNO,”Willowcallsout,thegameclosetocomingtoanend.ButnotbeforeQuinnlaysdown

a card that activates the wheel. As we all wait for it to stop, the six cards have been reshuffled and

addedbackin,soit’sanyone’sguesswhatwillbepicked.

It lands on her, and she rolls her eyes, reading the card out loud to us, “Do twenty jumping

jacks.”

Both Ari and Jacob had to do it earlier, and it was pretty funny to watch them. But there’ll be

nothingfunnyaboutwatchingQuinn’shotassdoit.Shegetsupalittlewobblyfromsomanydrinks

andbegins.Coolly,IdrinkmyScotch,tryingnottostareather,butit’shardwithhertitsalloverthe

place.

Issheevenwearingabra?

Asshejumpsandweallcountforher,she’sbacktolookinginthecorneroftheroom.Ilean

back in my seat, placing my hand on my thigh. Her eyes move to me, and I have to battle with my

cocktostaydown.Ican’ttellyouhowmanyhard-onsI’vegottentonight.

“Twenty!”Theroomerupts,andsheplopsdownsmellingevenbetterthanshehasallnight.

Asweworkbackaround,Willowendsthegame,cheeringasshelaysthefinalcarddownand

collectsherwinnings.Theguysalltosstheirhandsonthetable,pissedthattheylostandIcouldn’t

care less. Getting up, I decide to sneak away to check my email, hoping I’ve received the final

confirmationthattheCanadiandealisclosed.

Headingintothebathroom,soIdon’tgetcaught,Ihaven’tmissedanythingnew.Imean,other

thanthenormalbullshitthatalwaysgoesalongwiththesedeals.SoIrespondtoafewemailsfrom

earlier,andwhenIwalkbackintothebedroom,Quinnislyingonthecouch,herheadrestingonthe

armandhereyesareclosed.

WasIinthereforthatlong?

Lookingdownstairs,thehouseisdarkandquiet.

Everyonewenttobedalready?

Turning back, I feel bad for Quinn sleeping on the couch like that; she looks uncomfortable.

“Quinn?”Ishakeheralittle,andshegroggilylooksupme.

“Yeah?”sheasksme.

“Comeon,getinbed.”

Shenodsandsetsherglassesonthearmofthesofa.“Ididn’tknowwhichbedyouwanted,”she

saystome.

“I don’t think I’ll fit in either,” I tell her and pull the covers back for one, and she crawls in,

yawningsoadorably.Myeyesareonherlips,andasIcoverherup,she’salreadyout.

GrabbingmyiPad,IsitdownonthecouchsothankfulthatIbroughtitwithmeandseeanemail

fromAri.Thatmotherfucker!

To:MerrittSmith

From:AriAndersal

November02,201612:23am

Toldya,you’dgetthedeal.

Attached is an email from the landowners in Canada thanking Ari for his and his company’s

time,butsayingthattheyaretakingourbidonthedeal.Thenewsisfuckin’awesome.Typingupan

emailtoAri,Ithankhimforsendingmethemessage,thenquicklyemailmydadtosharethegood

newsthatwillmakehisnight.AfterIhit“send,”IrestmyheadbackandlookoveratQuinn.Myheart

startstopound,watchingher.Idon’tgetwhatitisabouther.Maybeit’sthefactthatshedoesn’tseem

to be into me. You know that saying, you want what you can’t have? And clearly, I can’t have her.

She’santi-menandall.

Leaving the room before she catches me watching her like a weirdo, I leave my iPad on the

couchandgoraidthefridgeforamidnightsnackandanotherdrink.Withafreshbeerinmyhand,I

eatacoldpieceofpizzaandgazeoutthewindowsatthevastsnowyview.

It’s gorgeous here compared to the heat of Texas that I’m used to. Finishing my beer, I

contemplateanother,butI’mspent,Ireallyam.I’vebeenupsincefivethismorningandneedtosleep,

soItrudgemyassbackupstairsandquietlyopenthedoor.QuinnisstilloutasIgrabsomethingto

changeinto.Goingintothebathroom,Iturntheshoweron.SteamquicklyfillstheroomasIbrush

myteethandlosethereflectionofmyselfinthemirror.

Strippingnaked,mycockishalfhard,likeit’sbeenallnight,andIgetintheshower,hoping

somehotwaterwillkeepitatbay.Itscaldsmyskin,andIletit.Ineedsomethingelsetofocuson,my

minddriftingbacktoearliertonight.TothewayQuinn’sskintastedbeneathmylipsandhowhertits

bouncedunderhert-shirt.

Runningmyhandsthroughmyhair,Ipopopenmyshampoo…thesmellofmintalwaysmakes

mefeelgood.Thenwashingmybodywithabarofsoap,Iadmitit’salostcause—thereisnotaming

my dick tonight; it’s not going to go down unless I get my cum out. Looking down at it standing

straight up, I grip the base, stroking it tightly. Holding it firmly in the palm of my hand, the tip

pulsates,andmyballstighten.

Sittingdownontheledgeintheshower,Irestmyweightbackonthecooltilewallandstroke

myself.AsIclosemyeyes,Quinn’sasscomesintomymind,andI’dlovenothingmorethantofuck

it,toseehernakedandhavemywaywithher.

Shemightactlikeshedoesn’twantme,‘causeshe’sbeenhurtandall,butifshe’dletme,I’d

haveherbeggingformore.AndthesecondthatIimagineheronherkneessuckingmeoff,Iletgo,

cumflyingintheairasmybodytensesandallthepentussexualtensionthatisinsideofmeflows

out.

Chapter5

Quinn

MymindisfuzzyasItakeinthebedroomandtrytounscrambletheeventsoflastnight.HowdidIget

in this bed? Heck, how did I get upstairs? Focusing on the clock to read the time, it hits me, and I

rememberhowsweetMerrittwaswhenheputmetobed.

Gettinguptousetherestroom,Ispotmyglassesonthearmofthecouch.AsIplacethemon

myface,IglancearoundandnoticeMerrittisn’tinhere.Icantellhesleptinhisbed,though,withthe

sheetsalltwistedupandpillowshalfoffthebed.

Opening the bathroom door half asleep, there he is, on his iPad as he brushes his teeth at the

sametime.“Morning,”Itellhim,andhewinksatme.Iclosethedoortothetinyroomwiththetoilet.

AfterI’mfinished,Iwalkout,andheasksme,“Didyousleepwell?”

“Yeah,reallyhard.You?”

“Notsogood.”

“I’msorry.”

“It’sokay.”

Splashing some water on my face, I notice he is glaring at his iPad like something is really

botheringhim,andIhavetoask,“What’sthematter?”

“Justworkshit.”

“See?That’swhyyouneedtostayoffthatthing.ForallIknow,myworkcould’veburnttothe

ground, but I’m not stressing about a thing.” He thinks about my comment like he is actually

consideringit,andIoutstretchmyhand,wonderingifhe’llreallygiveuphisiPad.

“CanIatleastcheckitonceaday?”heasks.

“No!” I shake my head and place my other hand on my hip, so he knows I’m dead serious.

“Okay,letmejustemailmyassistant.”

Ismile,lovingthatheisactuallygoingtounplug.Igetthatitmightsounddumb,butuntilyou

tryit,youdon’trealizethepowerelectronicshaveoveryou.

AsIwaitforhimtofinishhisemail,Ibrushmyteethandcombmyhair.I’mprettysureweare

skiingtoday,soI’mnotgonnabotherputtingonanymakeup.

Then I hear him hit send as I put my last contact lens in. I figure he’ll leave his iPad on the

counter,buthewalksoffwithit.

“What are you doing?” I stop him from leaving. My hand hits his rock hard chest, the

connectionbetweenusinstantlysostrong.Myinsidesignitethesamewaytheydidlastnightwhenhe

pinnedmeagainstthecountertopandtookabodyshotoffme.

Losingmyselfinhim,IforgetallabouthisiPadashetrailshisfingersupmyarmandcupsmy

neck.Myeyesclose,feelingthemomenttothefullest.I’mnotsurewhyI’mlettinghimtouchmelike

thiswhenIdon’tevenknowhim,butsomethinginsidemewantsto.

AsIopenmyeyes,he’sevenclosertome,hishotbreathonmine,andIfigurehe’llkissme.

Bracingmyweightonthecountertop,Iwait…

He slips around me and walks off with his iPad. Jesus, I wanna yell at him for leaving me

panting, but I don’t. My neck is still warm where his hand held it, and I touch it myself, feeling the

warmthbeneathmyfingertips.

Itwasasifhewasclaimingandpossessingme,inawayI’veneverexperienced,butIlikedit,

andI’mnotsurewhy,seeingasmenhavealwayshurtmeintheend.SowhywouldMerrittbeany

differentthantherest?

Aknockonthedoorstartlesme.“Comein.”

Willow is ready for the day; her long red hair pulled up, and makeup perfectly applied. “I

brought you coffee.” I take the cup from her, wrapping my hands around it. The warmth settles the

sexualtensionthatisriflinginsideofme.“Yousleepokay?”Ihearherwords,butmyneckcanstill

feelhisdamnfingersonme.“Quinn?”

“Yeah,I…I,uh,passedoutandsleptsuperhard.”

“NoissueswithMerritt?”

“Nope,”Irespondandtakeasipofmycoffee.

“Okay, well…I was just talking to Ted about the driving situation today, and with everyone’s

gear,we’regonnahavetotaketwocars.Areyouokaydriving?”

“Sure.”

“Awesome,thanks,babe.”Sheleavesthebathroom,andIdon’thavelonguntilwehavetoleave.

SoIhavetopullmyshittogether.

Digging through my suitcase, I pull out my thermals and ski pants. Getting dressed, I spot

Merritt’s bag on the floor and am tempted to look through it for his iPad. Walking up to it, I look

downandrightasIbenddown,Kamibargesintotheroomandscarestheshitoutofme.

“DoyouhaveahairtieIcanborrow?”

I pop up like I wasn’t doing anything wrong, and thankfully, she’s oblivious. “Yeah, in my

makeupbaginthebathroom.”

Sherushesinandjustasfast,chargesout,tyingherhairupontopofherhead.“Youready?”

“Ithinkso;Ineedfood.”

Aswewalkout,IlookdownatMerritt’sbagandwonderwhyitevenmatterstomeifhehashis

iPadornot.He’stheonethat’snotgettingthefullexperienceofthetrip,notme.

“Youwantsausageorbaconinyourbreakfastburrito?”Tedasksme,cookinginthekitchen.

“Neither.”

“She’savegetarian,”Willowremindshim.

“Really?Why?”Merrittaskslikeitoffendshim,chowingdownonaburritohimself,thetipsof

hishairstickingoutfrombeneathhisbeanie.

“Forafewreasons.”

“Whichare?”I’mnotsurewhythequestionpeevesmesobad,butitdoes.It’snoneofhisdamn

business.“Areyouavegetarianorvegan?”hepersists.

“What’sitmattertoyou?”

“I’mjustasking,what’syourproblemallofasudden?”

Everyone in the room looks at me, and I realize how ridiculous I’m being. Just because he’s

drivingmesexuallymaddoesn’tmeanthatIhavetobesuchabitchtohim.Twocanplayathisgame,

andthatiswhatIfullyintendtodo.

“Vegetarianandforhealthreasons.”

“That’scool.”

Tedpassesmemyburrito,andIpeekinside,justtobesurethereisnomeat.AsIbegintoeat,

wedecidethedrivingarrangementsfortheday.AriandMerrittwillbewithme,andKamiandJacob

willridewithTedandWillow.

Watching Merritt joke with the guys, I remind myself why I’m truly here—for a week of

relaxation, unplugged from the drama of my life and definitely no guys. Time and time again, I’ve

fallenintothesametrapthatalwaysleavesmeheartbrokenintheend,andIwon’tleadmyselfdown

thatroadagain…nomatterwhat.

Chapter6

Merritt

SittinginthebackseatofQuinn’sJeepasshedrivesustotheskiresort,Ariisonhisphone,whichI

havenocluewhyhewasabletokeepitwiththefitthatWillowthrewwhenshesawIhadmine.

Butthat’snotwhat’sreallyonmymind.It’sQuinn.Myeyesareonherintherearviewmirror

asshedrives,controllingthecareffortlesslyaswetrekupthesideofthemountain.Everysooften,

shekeepsglancingatme,makingmewonderifshewantsmejustasmuchasIwanther.

“Wouldyouturntheradioup?”

She smiles at my request as Ari gripes under his breath at his phone, emailing or messaging

onlyGodknowswho,andIhavetoadmit,eventhoughIdidn’tgivehermyiPad,beingunplugged

fromtheworldrightnowfeelsreallygood.

“YoulikeStateless?”sheasksme.

“Yeah,they’reoneofmyfavoritebands.”

“Metoo.”

“Youeverseenthemlive?”

“IreallywantedtowhentheycametoDenverandplayedatRedRocks,buttheticketssoldout

inminutes.”

“I’veseenthemafewtimes;they’reprettyincredible.”

“Really?”Hereyesbeam,andIlovetoseetheexcitementinherexpression.

Quietly,shesingsalongtothesong;hervoiceisbeautiful,andthenAriblurtsout,killingthe

moment,“Youknowwhat,man?Yourfatherisafuckingprick.”

“Ha,andyouthinkIdon’tknowthat?”

“Iswear,he’llthrowmoneyaway,justtomakemylifehard.”

MyfatherwaspissedwhenArimadethedecisiontoleavehiscompanyandjoinforceswithone

of the big timers in oil and gas. I couldn’t care less—I just wanted to see my friend happy, and

workingundermyfather,Ariwasn’t.“Whatdidhedo?”

“He got word of our bid on the Matrix land in North Dakota and offered the seller a million

dollarsmorethanuswhenhewasn’tevenpartofthebidding.”

“A million dollars?” Quinn chimes in, obviously she thinks she didn’t hear the amount

correctly.

“Yeah,amillion.”

“Youdon’tknowhisfather;he’sruthless,”Arisays,andIcouldn’tagreemore.Whenitcomes

to business, he doesn’t let anyone or anything get in his way. I don’t agree with half of the stuff he

does, but at the end of the day…he’s my boss, and if I want to inherit his company one day, then it

meansI’vegottaputupwithhisshit…allofit.

Ariisglaringoutthewindow,deepinthought,andIwishIcouldfixwhatmydaddid.

“I’mreallysorry,man.”

He nods, brushing me off as Quinn parks her SUV. We all get out of the car; my balls are

alreadyfreezing.Ari’sphoneringsandheanswersit,walkingawayfromusandtowardsthelodge.

“It’s gorgeous here,” Quinn says, taking in the view. The sun is peeking through the clouds,

tryingtowarmtheday,butit’snothelping.

“Itmightbepretty,butwhat’sit,like,tenbelow?”Icomplain.

“Don’tbesuchababy,”shetellsmeaswegetourgearoutofthebackofhervehicle.

“So,youskialot?”Iaskher.

“WhenI’mnotworkingItryto,you?”

“NotasoftenasI’dlike.Workseemstorunmylifethesedays,andwhenIgetamomentaway,I

endupcatchinguponsleep.”God,thatsoundslame,butitmustnotbebecausesheagreeswithme.

“Itotallygetwhatyou’resaying.Itookalongweekendlastmonthandhadalltheseplans,but

gotnothingdone.AllIdidwassleep.”

Jesus,notonlyisshehotashell,butherworkseemsjustasimportanttoherasmineistome.

Sheisaone-eightyfromthechicksI’mnormallyinterestedin—thefirstissueisalwaysthatIwork

toomuch.

“You guys ready to get smoked down the hill?” Ted asks with his head out the window as he

pullsupnexttous.

“You wish,” Quinn says, and the other guys gather their gear before we all walk inside the

mountainlodgetogetsuitedup.Thegirlsareinfrontofus,andIfindmyeyesonQuinn’sbody…

again.Evenbeneathherskioutfit,everycurveiscallingforme.“Youhitthatshitlastnight?”Jacob

asksme.

“Nah,shepassedout.”

Henodsandsays,“Yougonna?”

“Fuck,I’dliketo.”

“Didyoubringextrahandwarmers,baby?”Kamiaskshim,andIhopethegirlsdidn’thearus.

He passes them to her, then offers me a pair. Gladly, I accept, really wishing they made a pair you

couldtiearoundyourballsack.Afterweareallsuitedup,IspotAriatthebar.He’sstillonhisphone

andwavesustogoahead.

“He’llfindhisway,”Willowsays,notcaringthatweleavehim,andIkindafeelbadforleaving

him.

“Whatabouthisgear?”

“Ileftmycarunlocked,”Quinnsays.

Gettinginthelineforthechairlift,it’sapparentthatQuinnandIwillberidinguptogether.The

othercouplesarelostinconversation,andI’mnotsurewheretobegin.It’salongrideupandbeing

soclosetoherhasmymindonotherthings.

Wetakeaseat,ourthighstouchingaswemakeourinclineupthemountain.Quinnlooksoutat

the vast Rocky Mountains, taking in the view once again and I swallow, wishing I could find some

damnwordstosay.Thankfully,shemakesiteasyandpullsoutasmallflaskfromthepocketofher

lightbluecoat.Shetakesaswigthenpassesittomeandsays,“Letitallgo,Merritt.There’snothing

you can do about anything from up here.” She reads me well, and I knock back a drink, her words

resoundinginsideme.

IhatethatmyfatherhasupsetAri,andIwanttoundowhathe’sdone,butwithmydad,noone

tells him how to do things, and out of anyone, I know that best. The sting of the tequila warms my

throat,remindingmeofthebodyshotItookoffQuinnlastnight.

“Yougonnaletitgo?”sheasksme.

“I’mtrying.”

“Youdon’twanttobelikeAri,stressingoverworkwhenyoucouldbeenjoyingallofthis,do

you?”Sheopensherarmswide,makingmetakeinthesightsoftheskiresort.

“Idon’t,buthe’spissedatwhatmydaddid,andIfeelbad,likeI’mpartlytoblame.”

“Youdidn’tdoit,didyou?”Ishakemyhead,andshesays,“You’renotyourfather.Letitgo

andAriwilltoo.”

She’sright,Ineedto,andhewillaswell.

We each take another sip, the chair lift smoothly taking us up the mountain, and she asks me,

“So,areyougoingtogivemeyouriPadorwhat?”

“Noway!”

“Comeon.”Shebitesherbottomlip,andI’dlovetofeelhermoutharoundmycock.

“Let’ssayIdo.WhatdoIgetinreturn?”

“Nothing!”sheexclaims,likethinkingofrepayingmeisacruelpunishment.

“Comeon;IcanthinkofalotofthingsI’ddoinexchangeforhandingmyiPadovertoyou.”

“Okay,thennamesome.”

I’m still holding the flask and take another swig before giving it back to her. “I’d like to kiss

you,forstarters.”

“ButIwouldn’tkissyouback,”shesays,andIleanintoher,smellinghersweetness,knowing

shecan’tresistthesexualtension.She’dkissme,andsheknowsit,andrightasIgotoconnectour

lips, the chair lift reaches the top of the hill. “Welcome to the top,” someone says, and she panics,

tossingmetheflaskasshewrapsherhandsaroundherskipoles.IscrewthetoponitasIpositionmy

boardontheground.Shepushesherselfforward,andwegetofftheliftjustintime,makingourway

overtothegroup.Isticktheflaskintomypocket.“Youguysallcoolifwestartonthisblueslope?”

Tedaskseveryone,andIbucklemyleftfootintomyboard,stokedtoheaddown.Weallagree,and

Quinnasksme,“Youhavetheflask?”

“Yup, and you still owe me that kiss.” I take off, following everyone, leaving her behind.

Lookingbackather,she’srightbehindmeasshedigsherpolesintothethicksnowandpushesright

onpastme.“Fine…ifyoucancatchme.”Shebreezesonby,andIcuttheedgesofmyboard,working

togettractionasItryandcatchuptoher,butdamn,she’sfast.

“Shealwaysthatquick?”IhollerovertoWillow.

“No,shemustbeshowingoff.”

I smirk and make my way down to the bottom, loving the feeling of the alcohol coursing

throughmysystemandnotfocusingonanythingelsebutmynextmove.

IlosesightofQuinn,andonceIreachthebottom,Idon’tseeher.ThenIlooktomyleft,and

she’sinlineforthechairlift.Ithrowmyarmsupather,andshegetsonachair,ridinguptothetop…

alone.

“Man,shedoggedyou,”Tedsays,andIgetinlinewiththegroupridingupbymyself.Withthe

flaskinhand,Itakeadvantageandfinishit.

Thealcoholisfloodingmyveins,andIrealizehowitmakesmefeelwarmer.WhenIgetoff

thelift,Quinniswaitingforus.“Why’dyoudogme?”Iaskher,usingTed’sword.

“I told you to catch me, but I guess you were too slow. So now it’s your loss.” I laugh at her

remarkasshereachesintomypocketandtakestheflaskout.She’sgonnabepissedthatIdrankitall,

soIstrapupmyleftfootintomyboardandgetaheadstart,laughingasIhearhercomingafterme.

UpaheadIspotagroveoftreesandbankleft,turningintothem.Ihavetoslowmyspeed,and

whenIglanceback,Quinnisstillfollowingme.Oncemyboardcomestoacompletestop,Iunstrap

bothofmyfeetandlookather,desirerunningthroughmeasIsteptoher.

“You drank my entire flask?” she huffs, and I don’t answer her, just stalking towards her,

wrappingmyarmsaroundherbody,zoninginonthosesexyfuckin’lips.

She doesn’t protest or say another word; she just stands there all bundled up and naturally

beautiful.Theonlysoundsareherraggedbreathingandthetallpinetreesastheyswayinthewind

aboveus.

“I’mgonnakissyou,”Itellherandthenmylipsareonhers.Ourcoldnosesseemwarmagainst

thebitterchill,andIrelishinthefeeling.Herlipssofullandsoft,Ilovehowshetastes.Hertongue

strokesinsyncwithmine,andIdon’twanttostop.

Holdingherbodyclosetomine,shewhimpers,andmycockbeginstogrow—

even in the frigid winter temperature, she can still turn me on. God, she tastes so amazing. I

wantmorewithQuinn.Ineedtohavemore.Iwillhavemore.I’llhaveeverysinglebitofherifit’s

thelastthingIdo.

Chapter7

Quinn

Walkingbackintothelodgeafteradayfullofskiing,mylegsaresosoreandtired.Idon’tfeellikeI

cantakeanotherstep,andasIsitdown,reliefheatsmylimbsinthemostdeliciousway.

“Hey,didyouseeAriatalltoday?”Willowasksme.

“No,Ithoughthewasjustinheredrinking.”

IglanceoveratMerrittwhoisbullshittingwithTedandJacob,thethreeofthemobliviousto

Ari’s absence. “Do you guys know where Ari is?” Willow asks them, and they all three give her a

blankexpressionandshaketheirheads.

Shewalksawayfromusandovertothebar,askingthebartenderaquestion.“Whatdidhesay?”

Iaskherasshecomesbacktous.

“Hedoesn’tknowshit.”

“Shouldwegobacktothehouse?”Ioffer.

“Ithinkso;it’snotlikehimtojustdisappear.Youknowhelovesskiing.”

Loading up in my car, Merritt sits in the front seat. Since our kiss in the trees, nothing has

changed,andIlikethat.“Wheredoyouthinkheis?”Iaskhim

“Youwannaknowmyhonestopinion?”

“OfcourseIdo.”

“He’sprobablybangingsomechickhemettoday.”

“Really?Youthinkso?”

“I do. I bet he met her at the bar and after getting pissed about work…” he trails off and I

couldn’timagineAridoingthat.He’ssuchaniceguyonthesetrips.“Youlookshocked.”

“Iam.”

“Why?Weallfuck.”

“Iknow,IjustthinkofArilikeabrother,soIcan’timaginehimdoingthat.”

“Well,youdon’tknowtheguyIdo.”

“Isthatthewayyouare?”Iaskhim,wonderingifhe’sonlycomingontomesowecanfuck.

“No way,” he’s quick to answer like he’s the total opposite. With my hands wrapped tightly

aroundthesteeringwheel,Iputmycarinparkbackatthehouse,andIcan’thelpbutwonderifhe’s

lying.“What,youdon’tbelieveme?”heasks,sensingmydoubt.

“Not really.” And I’m not sure if it’s that I don’t believe him, or I’m just trying to push him

away.Menhavemesotwisteduplately,Idon’tknowwhattobelieveanymore.

“Whatever,Quinn,youdon’tknowme.”Hegetsoutofmycar,pissed,andIfollowbehindhim,

headinginsideandstraightfortheliquor,needingafuckin’drink.

“Ari?” Willow calls out, and before he can answer her, Ari is in Merritt’s face, shoving him

backwards.“DidyoureallythinkIwouldn’tfindout?”

“Whatthefuckareyoutalkingabout,man?”hechallengesback,lookingdownathim.

“Mystocks,man.Youfuckedme.”Arishoveshimagain.

“Ididn’tdoshit,man!”

“Fuckyou!”

“Youdon’tknowthewholestory.”AndthistimeMerrittpusheshimback,obviouslyagitated,

sohardArifallstohisass.Hefliestohisfeetandswings,catchingMerrittwithahardrighthookin

the face. The sound of Ari’s fist against Merritt’s skin echoes in the room, and I close my eyes

clenchingthebottleoftequila.Thenoisesomehowpiercesfrommyguttomyhead.

IopenmyeyesandthankfullyTedandJacobhavejumpedinandarepullingtheguysapart.

“That’senough,”Willowshouts,andMerritthashishandoverhisface,bloodstreamingdown

hisarmashewalksawayfromallofusandtowardsourroom.Runningafterhimtomakesurehe’s

okay, I realize I’m still holding a bottle of liquor as I enter looking for him

I find Merritt in the

bathroom,leaningonthecounterwithatowelpressedtohisfacewhereAri’sfisthithim,andIpass

himthebottle.

“Youokay?”Iaskandhenods.“What’shetalkingabout?”

Hetakesaswigandlooksrightatme.“Afterheleft,he’sbeenwaitingforthemoneyfromthe

stockhehadinthecompany.Myfatherhasbeenstallingonsigningoffonthem,dickinghimaround

andshit.SoIhadthemtransferredintomynameandwasgoingtopayhimwhattheywereworth.I

hateseeinghimgetscrewedoverbymydad,youknow?”

“Andnowhethinksyouboughtthembehindhisback?”

“Yeah, and what pisses me off the most is that he’d even think I’d do something malicious to

him.He’smybestfriend.”

“Thentalktohim.”

“No,fuckhim,heswungfirst.”

Obviously,Merrittislettinghisfeelingsgetthebestofhim,soIfigureIcan’tpushhim.“How

didheevenfindout?”Iask.

“Probablymydad.He’sbeentryingtodriveawedgebetweenussinceheleftthecompany.”

“Whywouldyourdaddothat?”

“Youdon’tknowmyfather.Heneedstocontroleverything;hewaspissedatmewhenhefound

outIboughtthem.”

Merritttakesanotherswig,andIplacemyhandoverhis,wantingtolookathisface.Holding

ontothetowel,heletsgo,butlooksdownatmeandeveninthiscrazyassmoment,itseemsI’mall

thatmatters.

Gently,Iliftthetowel,buthisfaceisstillbleeding,splitwideopen.“How’sitlook?”

“Not too bad,” I lie and press the towel back against his face. As I hold a little pressure, he

winces.Staringintomyeyes,hereachesupandrunshisthumbovermybottomlip.Myinsidesheat

fromthetouch,theeffecthehasovermeisunreal.I’mnotsurewhattodo.Mymindistellingmeone

thing,butmyheart,mypoordamagedheart,istellingmeanother.

However, before I can battle with the decision any longer, we are interrupted by Kami as she

brings in ice and a first aid kit. “How’s it look?” she asks, and I stupidly respond, still in a daze,

“Good.”

Ipullthetowelaway.Thebleedinghasslowed,andMerrittlooksinthemirrorathisface.“You

thinkthislooksgood?”hecomplains.

“Imeantitlooksbetter.”Iopenthefirstaidkitandfindafewbutterfliestoplaceoverthecut.“It

mightneedstitches,”Kamiadds,andhebrushesheroff,takinganotherswigofliquor.I’mtemptedto

takethebottlefromhim,he’sbeendrinkingallday,andnowwiththis,hemightendupfightingwith

Ariagain.

“Or not…let me know if you guys need anything else. We’re ordering pizza for dinner. Any

requests?”

“Aveggieone,please.”

“Merritt?”

“Nah,I’llprobablybeleavingsoon.”

Kamileaves,andMerrittisgivingmethatlookagain,makingmyheartraceamillionmilesa

minute.“Leaving,why?”

“Idon’tknowanyonehere,andI’mnotabouttodealwithAriandhisshitwhenIwasjusttrying

tohelp.”

“But,youknowme.”

“Thatdoesn’thelprightnow.Ishouldn’thavecome.Ihaveatonofworktodo.”

“Merritt,Igetthatyouwanttogo,butAriisyourbestfriend,right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then talk to him before you leave. Trust me—you don’t want to run from your problems.”

Hearing the words myself makes me feel like that is what I’m doing, pushing aside the pain of my

breakup this week. But maybe that is what I need to be doing, in order to get past what I’ve been

through.I’vegottaletitgo,thesamewayMerrittneedstoletthedramawithArigotoo.

HestudiesmeasIlookatthecutonhisface.“Areyousureyoudon’twanttohaveadoctor

lookatthis?”Iaskhim.

“Yeah,it’llbefine.”

“Okay. But, before you make your mind up and leave, I want you to know, I’m sorry about

accusing you of not being a good guy,” I tell him, feeling bad for insinuating such a thing earlier.

Clearyheisaniceguy—lookwhathedidforAri.

“It’sallgood.Youjustwentthroughabreakup,soyourheartisguarded,Igetthat.”

“Thankyou.”

“Ofcourse.SoIguessI’llgoandseeifIcanhashthisshitoutwithAri.”

“Yeah?Youwantmetocome?”

“No,Mom,we’llbegood,Ipromise.”

“Mom?”Irespondbacktohim,mymouthgapingopen.

Hewinksandkissesmycheek—hislipsonmeagainareasurprisebuthavemewantingmore.I

don’tknowwhatitisabouthimthatmakesmyinsidesaflusteredmess.I’veneverhadamanmake

mefeellikethis,ever.

Chapter8

Merritt

“Sowegood,man?”IaskAriafterIexplaineverythingandwefinallygettothebottomoftheshit

mydadtriedtopull.

“Yeah,sorryIjumpedtoconclusions.”

“It’sallright.YouknowI’malwaysgonnalookoutforyou.”

“AndIappreciatethat.”

“Ofcourse,brother.”

“Youknowyouroldmanisfuckedup,though,right?”

“Youdon’thavetotellme.Idealwithitonthedailyandonlybecausesoonthecompanywillbe

mine.”

“Damnstraightitwill.”

We exchange a hand slap and then go downstairs. The group is all seated around the dining

roomtable,andQuinnsmileswhensheseesustogether.Thedoorbellrings,andAriandIgrabthe

abundanceofpizzasthatwereordered.“Jesus,howmanypizzasdidyouthinkweneeded?”Ariasks

Willow.

“What?”shereplies,actinglikeit’snobigdeal.

Aswesetthepizzadowninthekitchen,Quinncomesovertousandsays,“So,areyouguys

good?”

“Ofcourse,thanksforpushingmetotalktohim,”Itellher.

“Anytime.”

“So in order to keep the peace going, I’m declaring tonight pizza and water night,” Willow

announces.

“What?”Theroomeruptsinchaosathercrazyassremark.ButI’velearnedthatwhenitcomes

toWillow,she’sabitcontrolling,andyoujustdon’targue.

“I’m serious, Ari, you had way too much to drink today, and the rest of you were hitting the

flasksallday.”

“Comeon,Willow,”Kamipleads.

“Nope!It’sgonnabeanearlynight.Wehaveicefishinginthemorning,andafterskiingallday,

wecoulduseachillnightandsomerest.”

Ariwalksovertothefridgeandgrabsabeer,twistingthetopoffanddroppingthecaptothe

floor.Willowisstunnedasheslamshalfthebeerandsays.“Howaboutpizzaandbeernight,nothing

hard?”Sherollshereyesaseveryonecheerslikeabunchofkidswhojustgottheirwaywiththeir

parents.IglanceatQuinn,andshesmilesbackatme,bothofusknowingourbottleoftequilaisstill

inourbathroom.

IgrababeerfromthefridgethentakeoneoutforQuinntoo.AsIpassittoher,shesmiles,the

mostadorableexpressiononherface.“Didtheygetyourveggieoneright?”

“Uhhuh,it’skindahardtomessup,though.”

“Iwouldn’tknow;Idon’teatveggieanything.”

Iopenoneoftheboxesandpulloutapieceofpepperoni.AsIeatit,Quinnsaystome,“What

doyousaywegotakeafewshots?”

Iwipemyhandsclean,lovingtheidea.Therestoftheroomisengulfedinconversationmaking

iteasyforustoslipaway.Ilockthebathroomdoor,sowearen’tinterruptedagain,andQuinnhops

uponthecountertop.“So,isWillowalwayssocontrolling?”Iaskherassheunscrewsthebottle.

“Yup,butshe’salwaysbeenthatway,andwe’vealllearnedtoacceptherbecauseshereallydoes

havethebestintentions.”Sheknocksbackaswigthenpassesmethebottle.

“Itcanbeannoyingthough.”

Shenodsandtheroomisfilledwithanawkwardsilence,andI’mnotsurewhattodo.Itakea

second drink, the alcohol burns, but I love it, and then give her the bottle again. “So ice fishing

tomorrow,youeverbeen?”Iaskher,things…stillawkward,andshegrins.

“Everyyear,you?”

“WhenIwasyounger.Iusedtofishallthetime,butnevericefishing.Nowwithwork,Idon’t

domuchofanythingelse.”

“So…ifyourworkissocrazy,howcomeyoucameonthistrip?”

“Ari has asked me for the last three years straight, and I turned him down. This time, I was

gonnadothesame,butthetruthis,Ineededthebreak.MydadandIareateachother ’sthroats.”

“Whydoyouworkwithhim?Hesoundsreallyterrible.”

“Oh,heis.Hehasthatdumboldschoolmentalityandthinkseveryonehastodowhathesays

‘cause he’s ‘the boss.’ My opinion doesn’t always matter; it’s just about closing deals and making

money.”

“Can’tyougoelsewhere?”

“Icould,buthe’ssettoretiresoon,andthenthecompanyismine.I’veworkedsohard,andit’s

rightatmyfingertips.”

“Wow,that’llbeawesome.”

“Itwillbe.Iturneddownafull-ridebasketballscholarshiptoDuke,soIcouldworkformydad.

SoI’vegottamakesurethispaysoff.”

“Youplaybasketball?”

“I did. I always wanted to join the NBA, but it was such a gamble and working for my father

wasn’t.Itwasasurething,thesafething,youknow?Enoughaboutme,whataboutyou?”

“Oh,there’snotmuchtome,”shegetsshy,andI’mnotsurewhy.

Isnatchthebottlebackfromher,andshelaughsatme.

“Don’tbestupid.Itoldyou,nowyoutellme,”Inudge.

“Umm,let’ssee,IgraduatedfromCUBoulderinColoradowithaMaster ’sdegreeinfinance

andgothiredatthefirstfirmIappliedto.Thatwasthreeyearsago.Now,I’maninvestmentadvisor

withthem.IwasrecentlypromotedaftersigningthebiggestclienttheyhadintheDenverofficethis

year.”

“Noshit,that’sfuckingawesome.”

“Yup!Notmyproudestmoment,though,consideringtheclientwasmyex.Butthejobissweet,

andeventhoughthingswithhimendedbadly,asleastIgotsomethingoutofthedeal.”

“That’skindafunny.”

“No,it’snot!”Sheglaresatmeandsnatchesbackthebottle,hersexyblueeyesglimmeringin

thebrightlightofthebathroom.

“Whatelse?”

“Whatdoyouwanttoknow?”

“Youhavesiblings?”Iaskher.

“No,you?”

“No.Whataboutyourparents?”Iask.

“TheyliveinDenverinthehouseIgrewupin.Igotodinnerattheirhouseonceaweek.”

“Lucky!IwishIhadthat.ThelastmealIatewithbothmyparentswaswhenIwasakid.”I’mnot

evensurewhyItoldherthat.Itmakesmesoundlikeabitch,butallthealcoholhasmespinning.

“I’msorry.”

“Not a big deal, my dad was always busy working, so he was gone, now I’ve joined him.”

Steppingtoher,standingbetweenherdanglinglegs,Ileanin,noteventhinkingasIbracemyweight

onthecountertopandblurtout,“Iwanttokissyouagain.”

“Quinn?”Willowcallsoutbeforeshecananswer,knockingonthebathroomdoor.

Hangingmyheaddown,themoment—yetagain—ruined.Ilookintohereyesandsheresponds,

“I’llberightout.”

“Areyouokay?”

“Yup.”

“HaveyouseenMerritt?”

ShelooksatmewithwideeyesandIhollerouttoher.“I’mhere;Quinnwasjustcheckingmy

face.”

WillowrattlesthedoorknobandIhidethebottleunderthesink,thenunlockthedoorandask

WillowasIopenit,“Doyouthinkweshouldreplacethebutterfliesyet?”Thequestiondistractsher.

ShestudiesthecutonmyfaceasIstandreallyclosetoherandthenshesays,“No,itlooksgood.”

“Cool,thanksforcleaningit.”IwalkoffleavingthegirlslikenothingwasgoingonwithQuinn

andwinkather,lookingbackatherstillsittingonthecounter,intheexactspotwhereIlefther.My

cockwantsherandispissedatmeforleavingher.Butbeforethenightisover…I’llhaveher.

Chapter9

Quinn

“Whatwereyouguysreallydoinguphere?”Willowasksme.

“Nothing,”Ilieandknowitdoesn’tsuitmeasallthebloodrushestomycheeks.

“Don’tlietome.”

“I’mnot,wewerejusttalking.”

“Inthebathroom?”

“What’sthatmatter?”

“Seemsalittlestrange.”

“Icametotakemycontactsout,andheaskedmetolookathischeek,thenwegottotalking.”

Istarttotakemycontactsout,myreflectionblurringfromsomuchliquorandshesaystome,

“Youlikehim,don’tyou?”

“Idon’tlikehim;Idon’tevenknowhim.”

“Listen,you’reabiggirlandcandowhateveryouwant,butArihastoldmestoriesaboutshit

theygetupto,soI’dwatchyourself.”

“Stories?”Iquestionher.

“Yeah,someshadyshitwentdowninVegaswiththemonetime,likeHangoverstyle.”

I laugh out loud at Willow, sliding my glasses on my face, and turn around. “Do you not

remembercollege?Yousleptwithhalfofthefootballteam,andnowyou’regivingmeadvice?”

“Youbitch!Thatwasforeverago.Youweren’tinnocentyourself,MissCocksucker.”

“No,Iwasn’t,nooneis.Plus,nothingwithMerritthashappenedorwillhappen.He’sasweet

guy,endofstory.”

My best friend hugs me, always trying to look out for me. “Shall we share a beer, Mrs.

Controlling?”

“Don’tcallmethat.”

“Okay,howabout,‘Mrs.WaterAndPizzaNight’?”

Shehitsmyarm,andweheaddownstairs.Everyoneisputtingontheircoatsandboots,andI’m

notsurewhy.“Whereyouguysgoing?”Iask.

“Firepit,”Kamitellsme.Tedisalreadyoutside,lightingalltheheatersthatlinethedeck.The

gas fire in the center is blazing, and I grab my coat, sliding my boots on at the same time. We all

flood outside and Merritt hands me a cup. “Here’s a fresh beer for ya.” I look in at the liquid and

knowrightawaythatit’snotbeer.

“Thanks.”

Theairiscoldasitwhipsaroundus.Itakeaseatononeofthebenchesthatsurroundthepitand

siponthestrongassdrinkI’mholding.“It’snotthatbadouthere,”Willowsays.

“Didyoubrings’morestuff?”Kamiasks.

“Dammit,IknewIwasforgettingsomething.”

“Damn,Mrs.Perfectforgotsomething,”Ariteasesher.

WillowglaresathimandIsuggest,“WecouldplayTruthorDare?”

“Noway,”Tedsays,“Lasttimethathappened,Ifrozemyballsoff.”

“Whathappened?”Merrittaskshim.

“Ihadtodoanakedsnowangel.”

“Ohshit.”

“Yeah,notfun.”

“I’llplay,ifeveryonethrowsinahundred,”Arisays.

“Whydoesitalwayshavetobeaboutmoney?”Willowaskshim.

“Uh,becauseitmakesitsomuchmorefun.”

“I’mdown,”Merrittaddsandthentherestofthegroupagrees.

“Sweet,that’saseven-hundred-dollarpot,”Jacobexclaims.

“Whataretherules?”Willowasks.Ofcoursesheneedstoknowtherules.

“Rules?Wedon’tneedrules,sis.Ifyouwon’tdoadare,thenyou’reout,lastpersongetsthe

money.”

“Whoa,”Tedchimesin,“Whatifwedon’tagreewithsomething?”

“Then don’t do it, Ted,” Ari says to him like he’s a moron, and Merritt and I calmly sit back

sippingonourdrinks.“Quinn,whydon’tyoustart?Itwasyouridea.”

“Okay.”IwrackmybraintothinkofaquestionanddecidetoaskMerritt.

“TruthorDare?”

“Truth.”

“Oh,comeon,man,”Arigripes,andIignorehim,continuingonwithmyquestion.

“Haveyoueverhadathreesome?”

Hesmilesandresponds,“No.”

Theplaymovestomyright,andforsomereason,Ibelievehim.ThenMerrittasksme,“Truth

orDare?”

“Truth.”

“Doyouspitorswallow?”

“Swallow,”Itellhimandtakeabiggulpofliquid.Swallowingit,thesexualtensionbetweenus

isoffthecharts.

Ariisnextandasksme,“TruthorDare?”Irollmyeyes,andhesays,“What?Youwantedto

playthisgame.

“Fine,Truth.”

“Doyoulikeitroughorslow?”

“Ari!”Ishoutathim,andhewaitsformetoanswer.

“Comeon,sevenhundreddollarsisontheline,”hechallengesmetoanswer.

“Fine…slow.”

Merrittiswatchingme,thesamewayhedidthefirsttimehewalkedinonmeshirtless,eating

meup,andIcrossmylegstostopmyclitfromtwitching.

Willowisnextandsays,“Quinn,TruthorDare?”

“Whatthefuck,youguys?”

“Youwantedtoplay,”sheremindsme,andIblurtout,“Dare.”

“Oh…Ididn’texpectyoutosaythat.”Wealllaughatherdumbremark.“I’vegotagoodone.

Givealapdancetoanyoneforaminute.”

“Oh…that’s so original,” I tell her, and she sticks her tongue out to me. I sense Merritt lean

back, thinking he’s got this in the bag, and I get up bending down in his ear as I bravely whisper,

“Maybelater.”ThenwalkoffandstraddleWillow.SheisshockedasIholdontoherneckandbegin

ridingherbody.Everyonecheersmeon,andshejustcoversherface,completelyembarrassed.

Aftermyminuteisup,Itellher,“Maybeyoushouldn’tpickonme.”

TedgivesmeabreakandasksWillow,whoisstillbeetred,“TruthorDare?”

“Truth,”she’squicktoanswer.

“What’syourfavoritetypeofporn?”

“Ted,”shescoldshim,andIfinditfunnyhowabunchofadultsturnwhatisusuallyaninnocent

child’sgameintosomethingsoinappropriate.

“Anal,”shewhispers,andweallbustoutlaughing.WhoknewourinnocentcontrollingWillow

wasintoanal?

NextisJacobandheasksArithequestion.“Dare,”heresponds.

“Givemeablowjob.”

“Baby!”Kamiscoldshim

“Whatthefuck?Noway,man.”

“Guessyou’reout!Remembertherules?”

“Fuckyou!”Heflipshimoff,andKamiasksme,“TruthorDare?”

I roll my eyes, finishing my cup of liquor. “Truth,” I respond scared that she will pull what

Jacobdid.

“Doessizematter?”

“Hell yeah, it does,” I blurt out, and everyone is quiet. I maybe could’ve answered that one a

littledifferently.

It’s my turn, and for some reason, the money isn’t coming into play at all. I just want to ask

Merritt.“TruthorDare?”

“Truth,”heresponds,andI’msurprised.

“Whatisyourbestsexualexperience?”Helickshislipsandthenasksme,“Youwantmetobe

honest?”

“Ofcourse.”

“Idon’tthinkI’vehadityet.”

Hiswordsandthatfuckingsmirkignitesomethinginsideme.He’sspeakingtome;Icanfeelit.

AndI’mnotevensurewhy.WhyamIintriguingtohim?He’ssexyandsuccessfulandcanhavehis

pickofwomen,buthewantsme,andasmuchasIdon’twanttoadmitit,Iwanthimto.

Chapter10

Merritt

“Shhh,”ItellQuinnassheeatsapieceofcoldcheesepizzainthekitchen.It’swayaftermidnight.The

restofthehouseisasleep,butwearestillup,drunkoffourassesandhavingfun.“You’regoingto

wakeupMrs.Controlling.”

Shelaughsloudly,notcaringwhohearsher.Wehavetobeupforfishinginacoupleofhours,

andIdon’twanttogotobed.

Lookingdownatherandhersexybody,hertitsarepoppingthroughhershirt,andIcan’thelp

myself.Leaningin,Ikissher,tastinghersweetnessagain.Shemeltsinmyarms,moaningagainstmy

tongue as she wraps herself around me. Taking my fingers, I knot them into the back of her hair,

holdingandcontrollingher.Mycockisrockhard,andtomysurprise,shereachesdownandgrabsit,

clenchingitthroughmypants.Ipressmyselfagainsther,thealcoholurgingmeon.Iwanther.

Fuck…Ineedher.

Shetiltsherheadbackandlooksintomyeyes,tellingmeshewantsmetoo,soIlifthert-shirt,

exposingherperkytits.“Iwannafuckyousobad,”IwhispersoftlyintoherearasIsqueezebothof

herhardnipplesinbetweenmyfingertips.Movingherhandinsidemypants,shegripsmyshaftand

says,“Thendoit.”

“Righthere?”Iquestionher,lookingaroundthekitchen.

“Mmhmm.”Reachingover,Iturnthelightoff,hopingifanyonewakesandcomesdownhere,

theywon’tseeus.Ipullmypantsdownasshetakeshersoff.“Areyouonthepill?”Iaskquietly,and

shenodsspreadingherpussylipsopenforme,tellingmethatshedoesn’twanttouseprotectionas

muchasIdon’t.

Hercuntisgorgeous,shavedsobeautifully,andbeforeIcandoanythingelseormoveherto

thecouchorourroom,shepullsmetowardsher,hertight,wetslitslidingaroundmeasIsinkinside

her. “Shit,” she moans, and I nestle myself all the way into her, my arms wrapped around her. She

gripsmydickfirmly,andasmuchasIwanttopoundtheshitoutofher,Irememberhersayingshe

likesitslow.GentlyIpullback,hercuntholdingontotheskinofmyshaft.Shebracesherweighton

thecountertopandwithmyfreehand,Ipushhershirtup,holdingontooneofhertitsasImovemy

cock,pleasingusboth.

“Fuck,”Imurmurandglancedown,lovinghowIlookmovinginandoutofher.Myhardshaft

isbulgingashersweetpussyswallowsmewhole.

Shemoveswithme,andIalreadywanttocome.Reachingdown,Irubherclit,wantingtopush

hertheretoo,andherfacetwistsasshewhimpers.

“Uhhuh,likethat.”

“Areyougonnacomeonmycock?”Imurmur.

Shecriesoutloudly,mywordsturningheronandIcoverhermouthtoquiethernoisesascum

suddenlyexplodesfrommyballs,shootingdeepinsideher.Heatradiatesfrommyheadtomytoes,

thefeelingoflettinggosointense.AsIfuckherandholdherinplace,shebeginstowrithe,giving

overtothepleasure.

Onceourbodiessettle,Idon’twanttostop,andshelooksatmeasIcontinuetomove,witha

smirkonhersexyfaceandasks,“Jesus,didthatreallyjusthappen?”

I nod, still hard, and pull my cock from inside her, we both look down at it covered in her

wetness,andIaskher,“Wannadoitagain?”

***

ReachingnexttomeforQuinn,she’snotthere.Ilikedcuddlingallnightandfuckingheronce

more.Openingmyeyes,Ilookattheotherbedandthenrollover,takingintheroom.

Somethingmovesonthefloorandcatchesmyeye.IlaughatQuinnwhoissleepinginthemost

uncomfortableposition.Pinchinghernipplethroughhershirt,shelooksupatmewithahugegrin.

“Howyoufeelingdownthere?”

“Didyoureallyletmesleeponthefloor?”Hervoiceisraspy,andIchucklealittle.

“Ihavenocluehowyougotdownthere.”Shesitsupandstretches,hertitsstrainingthefabric

ofhershirt.“Don’tdothat.”

“What?”

“That!”Ipointtoherhardtits,andshelaughs,gettingoffthefloor.Ipatthebednexttome,and

sheclimbsbackin,ourbodiesimmediatelyclosetogether.“CanIfuckyouagain?”

“Whatareweevendoing,Merritt?”

“Whatdoyoumean?”

“Wewentfromstrangerstoovernightloversand…I’mnotlookingforarelationship,Ijustgot

outofafuckedupone.”

“Well,I’mnotlookingforarelationshipeither,butIcan’tdenythatIlikeyourpussy…alot.”

Shelooksintomyeyes.“Sojustsex,that’sallyouwant?”

“Sure.”

“Whataboutnextyear ’strip?”

“I’msureI’llbebusywithwork.Afterthisweek,you’llneverseemeagain.Let’shavefun.We

obviouslyhaveanattractiontooneanother,andthenwecangoourseparateways.”

Sheswallowslikethedecisionishardtomake.Mycockisthrobbingforherlikeithasbeen

since I laid eyes on her perfect body. I push it against her ass and kiss the top of her shoulder. She

exhales,likingtheattention.ThenIslidemyhanddownthesideofherbodyandputmyhandinside

herpants.

“Justthisweek?”sheasks.

“Uhhuh.”IrollherontoherbackandbeginatrailofkissesalongherjawasIfingerher,slow

andgentle,likeshelikes.I’veneverbeenwithawomanwholikesitslow.Theyalwayswantmore,

harder,faster,butnotQuinn,andIthinkIcangetusedtoit.Thesmallest,slowestmovementspush

herovertheedge.

There’saknockonthedoorandwebothfreeze.“Quinn,Merritt?Youguysup?”Willowcalls

out.

“Yup, we’re up.” She answers for the both of us, and I add a second finger inside of her,

strokingherpussyasIlookather.Shehashereyesclosed,lyinginmyarms,undermycontrol.

Her breathing is fast as I finger her, adding a third finger, and she turns her face towards my

chest,quietingherselfbywhiningintome.“Comeforme,”Iorderher,movingmyhandfaster,and

boydoesshe.Herbodyshakesassheletsgo,grippingmyfingers,makingmydickwanttoexplode

asshebegsmeformore.

Asshesettles,Ithinkshemightwantithardandfast.ThesecondIpickedupspeed,sheletgo.

“CanIsuckyouoff?”

Inodandslipmypantsdown.Shebrushesherhairovertooneshoulderasshegripsmyshaft

andthenswallowsmewhole.Hermouth,sowarmandtight.Iurgemyhipstowardsher,meetingher

movements,andbegintofuckhermouth.

“Youwantmycum,don’tyou?”Iaskherquietly,andshenods,moaningagain,eatingallofme

up.

Myballstightenwatchingherstretchedlips—theyaresofuckinghot—andaswegazeintoeach

other ’seyes,Ican’tfightit,orstopwhatsheisdoingtome.Lettinggo,Ibarrelmyselfdeepintoher

throatasmycumdrenchesher.

Iholdontoherhair,groaningharshly,givinghermouthafewlastpumps.Shelicksmedrybut

seemstowanttokeepgoing,andthetruthis,Idon’twanttostop.Icouldgoatitalldaywithher.I’m

notsurewhatitis,butbeingwithheriseasyandfuckinggood,reallygood.

“Youbettertrytobequieternexttime,”shetellsme.

“Notachancethat’llhappenwiththatmouthofyours.”

Sheliftsmyshirtandbeginstokissmylowerstomach.“I’mgonnahavetofuckyou,Quinn,”I

warnher,butshedoesn’tstop.

“Did you bring—” Willow barges in and I cover myself up as she freezes when she sees us

togetherlikeweare.Quinnshootsupwardsandoutofbed.

IsitupandlookatWillowwhoisstandinginthedoorwayshocked.“I’msorry,guys.”

“It’sokay,”IsayandwonderwhyQuinnflewoutofbed.You’dthinkhermomwalkedinonus

orsomething.“I’mgonnashower,”Itellthemandadjustmycockunderthecovers,beforeleaving

themsotheycanhaveamomenttogether.I’msureWillowhasaboutamillionquestions,andI’mnot

downtobetherewhensheasksthemall.

Chapter11

Quinn

Merrittclosesthebathroomdoor,andWillowlooksbackatmewithwideeyes,likeamomwhojust

caughttheirkidinbedwiththeirteenageboyfriend.

“What’sgoingon?”

“Notmuch.”

“Quinn,don’tlietome.I’myourbestfriend.”

“Wewerejusttalking,andyoustartledme.”

Shecrossesherarms.Mybestfriendknowsmesomuchbetterthanthat.“Didyouguyshook

up?”

“Maybe,andsowhatifwedid?”

“Quinn,” she sighs and sits down on the bed. She pats it for me to join her and I’m sure I’m

abouttogetthemomlecture.“DoyoureallythinkhookingupwithMerrittisagoodidea,afterwhat

you’vejustbeenthrough?”

“Whatdoesmypasthavetodowithanyofthis?”

“Idon’twanttoseeyouenduphurtagainisallI’mworriedabout.”

“That’snotgoingtohappen,don’tworry.”

“Howdoyouknow?”

“Merritt and I agreed that whatever happens here, stays here. Plus, we’ll never see each other

afterthis.”

“Untilnextyear ’strip.”

“He’snotcoming.”

“Youreallythoughtthisallout,didn’tyou?”

“Yes,Idid,”ItellherbecauseIdon’twanttoenduphurtagaineither.Myheartisguarded,and

I’mgoingtokeepitthatway.

“Sowashegood?”

“Oh…nowyouwanttoknow.”

Shebumpsmewithhershoulderandnods.“Reallygoodandbig.Icouldn’tdenytheattraction

betweenusanymore.”Itryandkeepmyvoicedown,sohedoesn’thearus.

She holds her hands a distance apart, trying to gauge his size, and I look at them mouthing

“bigger”toher,andoutwalksMerrittwithatowelaroundhiswaist,alreadyfreshfromtheshower.

Myeyeseathimup,andrightaway,I’mshocked—he’stattooed.Ihadnoidea.Hewasinsideme—

twice—andIneversawhischest.

Willowputsherhandsdownandswallows,she’slookingatwhatI’mstaringattoo.“So…you

havethatthingIneededtoborrow?”sheasksmestillgawkingatMerritt.

***

“Biggest fish of the day gets three hundred and fifty dollars,” Ari says as we all get situated

aroundthefishingholestheguysdrilled.It’ssurprisinglysunnyandnottoocold.

Ijigmypoleoffthebottomofthelake,andArisaystome,“Youknowyou’reonlyscaringthe

fishawaybydoingthat.”

Istickmytongueoutathim.He’sjusttryingtogetundermyskin.Everyyearthisistheone

thingIconsistentlywin.Igrewupfishingwithmydad—he’sthebest,soI’vegotatrickortwoupmy

sleeve.

“Don’tbejealous.Youcanjusthandthemoneyovernow,ifyou’dlike.”

Theguysallbustuplaughing,andMerrittasksme,“You’rereallythatconfident?”

“I’vewonthiseveryyearwe’vefished…soyeah,Iam.”

Merrittrollshiseyes,andjustthenIgetanibble.Iwaitforthesecondbitebeforehookingit,

andonceIdo,theyallgawkatme.Thefishmustbebigasthetipofmypoleisbentlikean“n.”It’s

fighting coming up, and I keep the slack tight, taking my time. Kami gets one on too, and I see the

frustrationonAri’sfaceaswebothbattle.

Pulling my fish up, it’s massive. Ari throws his pole down and storms off walking in a big

circlelikeababy.“Oh…comeon,”IhollertohimasIremovethehookfromitsmouth.Rightaway

it’sobviousit’sakeeper.

Therestofthemorninggoesbythesame.Ikeephookingfishafterfish.Theothersdotoo,all

exceptforAriandMerritt.Arikeepsglaringatme,andIlookoutsideofourtentforMerrittbutdon’t

seehim.Hewalkedoutawhileago,Iassumetopeeorsomething,buthasn’treturned.KnowingIam

intheleadfishingwise,Ireelinmylineandgoinsearchofhim.Attheedgeofthelakeisasmall

hillandIcanseethetopofhishat.

Walkingtohim,theicecracksbeneathmyfeet,butIknowit’ssafe.TheyraceJeepsonthisice

everyyear.

WhenIreachMerritt,hehashishandsbeneathhisheadandiswatchingthesky.“Hey.”

“Hey,”herespondswithahugegrinonhisface.

“Whatareyoudoingouthere?”Iask.

“Youwantthetruth?”

“Always.”

“Tryingtokeepmydickdown.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,I…Idon’tknowifyouhavedrylipsorsomething,butthewayyoukeeplicking‘emhas

mydickreadytofuckyourmouth.”

Igigglealittleandliedownnexttohim.“Idon’tthinkI’veeverbeenfuckedinthemouth.”I

lookupatthesky,thefluffycloudsslowlyrollingbyastheymorphintoallsortsofdifferentthings.

Thesuniswarm,thereflectiononthesnowhelpingittowarmme.

“Youshouldletmedoittoyouthen.”

“Okay.”

“Really?”

“Sure.”

“When?” he questions me turning his head and the second I respond, “Now,” he reaches over

andpullsmybodyontopofhis.Takingmynose,Ibrushitagainsthis,lookingintohisclearbrown

eyes.

“Yousmellgood,”Itellhim.Hekissesme,ourmouthslingeringtogetherforamoment.

“I love the way you taste.” And with those words, we get lost, kissing one another. With me

lyingontopofhim,hisrockhardshaftisgrindingagainstme,andIpushbackagainsthim,wishing

hewereinsideofme.

Myglovedfingersdigdeepintothesnowandacoldbreezewhipsthroughtheair,coveringus

inafreshblanketofwhiteness.Westopkissing,butourmouthsarestillconnected.Ishiver,andhe

doesthesame.

“Holyfuck,thatwascold,”IspeakagainsthislipsasIpullbackatinybit.

“Yeah,itwas.”

“Weshouldprobablystop.”HeagreesandeventhoughIsaidit,Idon’twantto,butthetruthis,

thisisn’ttheplacetobemessingaround.

“Comeon.Ineedtocatchafish;Ican’thaveyouoneuppingme,”hechides.

“You’dneedtocatchseventobeatmysix,”Igloatandhopup,brushingthesnowoffofme.

Walking back to where the group is, he wraps his hand around mine, the gesture catching me off

guard. We agreed to fuck, nothing more, so him holding my hand worries me that he’s got other

intentions.

Chapter12

Merritt

“It’sallthere,”AritellsQuinnasshecountsherwinningsfromtoday.

“I’mjustmakingsure;Iknowhowyouliketoscampeople.”

“Please,thatwasonetimeandnotmyfault.”

“Whathappened?”Iask.Theybothlookateachother,waitingfortheotheronetotellme.

“Therentalcarcompanyneverchargedhimtheyearbeforelast,andhedidn’ttellthem.”

“Wouldyou?”Iaskher,andshenods,notgivingitasecondthought.“No,youwouldn’t.”

“Yeah,Iwould.”

“Whatever.”

Sherollshereyesatme,andIcouldspankherrightaboutnow.Tedfinishescleaningthefish

thatweallcaughttoday.EveryoneexceptforAricaughtone,whichwaskindafunnytoseehowmuch

ofababyhewasaboutit.

Quinnwalksofftohelpthegirls,andIaskAri,“What’stheplantomorrow?”

“I’mnotsure,maybeskiingagain.”

“Whatifwegosnowmobilingorsomething?”

“That’dbefun.Youwannabookaplace,andI’llpay?”Aswetalk,IhavemyeyesonQuinn’s

ass.“No.I’llpay.”

“Sodidyouhitthatyet,orwhat?”

Inod,andhegivesmeafistbump.“Wasitgood?”

“Fuckyeah,sweetpussy.”

“Sowhat’stheplan?”

“Noplan,we’rejustgonnahookupthisweekandthengoourseparateways.”

“Wow,lookatyou.Youguystalkedthisshitthroughandeverything.”

“I’m gonna go look at booking something for tomorrow. Jacob, Ted, you guys down to

snowmobile?

“Hellyeah.”

Igrabafreshbeerfromthefridgeandheadofftothebedroom.Sittingonthesofa,Igrabmy

iPad and do a Google search. “What are you doing?” Quinn asks me, coming in with a serious

expressiononherface.

“Wow,youjustcouldn’tstayaway,couldya?”

Sheshakesherheadandlocksthedoor,thenkneelsbetweenmylegs.Herbottomlipistucked

tightlyintoherteethassheliftsmyshirtandthenunzipsmypants.Bythetimeshewrestlesmycock

outfrominsidemyunderwear,it’srockhard.

Allofthebloodisrushingtothetip.Shelicksherlipsandthentakesmeintohermouth.She’s

soeagerasshesucksme,makingmyentirebodytingle.Icantellbyhowfastshe’sgoingthatshe

wantsmore.Pullingherback,Istopherandstandup.Thendirecthertositdownonthesofa.

Takingmyclothesallthewayoff,shewatchesmeintently,mybodywantingherevenmore.

“Youknow,Ididn’tknowyouhadtattoos,”shesays.

“No? Do you like them?” I ask her as she inspects my covered chest and I direct her to lean

back.Sotrustinglyshedoes,andIhopup,placingonelegonthecouch,leavingtheotherfootonthe

floor.“Openwide,baby.”Shelistenslikeagoodgirl.It’soneofthethingsthatturnsmeonsomuch

—she’s so willing. I nudge my dick into her sweet, sweet mouth, bracing my weight on the wall

behindusasmyhipsmoveinandoutofherfuckingtightlips.

Hertongueswirlsaroundme,andIdon’twanttogagher,butI’msounbelievablyhornythatI

just go farther and farther. And before long, I’m barreling in and out. She has her hands clenched

aroundmyasscheeks,herfingernailsdiggingintomyskin.“Yes,that’sit…takeallofme.”

Shemoanslettingmepushandpullinandoutofhermouth.Herhandskeeppushingmefaster,

andasmyballstighten,Ifightthefeeling.

Notalready.

Thenthere’sthatgoddamnannoyingknockonthedoor…again.Fuck,italwaysseemstocome

atthewrongtime.“Youguyscomingtothehotspringswithus?”Willowasksrightasmycomehits

me.

IpulloutofQuinn’smouth,grippingmyshaftatthebase,inhopesIcanstopit.“Yup,we’llbe

right there,” she says back, and it’s a lost cause. Cum shoots right onto her face. I jerk myself,

relishingintherelease.Quinnopenshermouthformeandletsmecomeonhertongue,lickingup

everybitshecan.

“God,shehastheworsttiming,”Itellher,aggravated,asIsqueezeouteverylastdrop.

“Youthink?”

“Clearly!I’mnotdoneyet,Quinn.Istillwanttofuckyou.”

“I guess it’ll have to wait then.” She slides out from underneath me and digs through her

suitcase. Her ass is bent over, and my needy cock tempts me. Pulling down her pants, I spread her

pussyandsliderightintoher.

“Ohfuck,”shecriesoutasIfillher,butshedoesn’tstopme.Iholdherasscheeks—theyboth

fitsocomfortablyinthepalmsofmyhands—asIbegintomove,innice,long,slowthrusts.

Shereachesforthedresserinfrontofherandholdsontoit.Herreflectionstaresbackatmein

themirror;shestillhasalittlecumonherface,andit’scompletelyhot.Hereyesaresogorgeousand

wanting.“Takeyourshirtoff,”Iorderherandrightawayshelistens,moaningintothesideofher

armtokeepquiet.

“CanIgofaster?”Iaskher,needingmore.WithQuinn,Ialwaysneedmore.

ShenodsandIpickupmypacealittlemoreeachtimeuntilIreachthepointwheremyballsare

slappingherclit.Hertitsbouncewitheverythrust,andsheholdson,lettingmegiveittoherharder

thanIeverhave.Andatthismoment,Idon’twantthistoendattheendoftheweek.Idon’twantto

stopwhatwe’vestarted.Ijustwanttohaveherandbewithherandfuckher,wheneverIwant,withno

rules.

Chapter13

Quinn

Asthesnowflakesswirlaroundus,theheatofthehotspringshasourbodiesblazing.Itisamazing

how something so natural and from the earth can not be affected by the elements above. The air is

freezing,butthewaterisaconsistentonehundredandtwodegreesyearround.

I can’t stop looking up at the twinkling stars, so bright at this elevation, and even more

illuminatedthroughthesheetofwhitenesscomingdownfromthesky.

Everyone is blitzed out of their minds, yelling and talking way louder than needed. But

thankfullyit’sjustushererightnow,probablybecauseit’ssocoldout.

I have a good buzz on and am totally content in this moment with Merritt’s arm behind me. I

neverimagined,beingsoskittishaboutmenbecauseofmypast,thatI’dbeanywherenearreadytolet

amanclosetome,evenforsex,letalonethiskindofintimacy.ButIhave,andwithMerritt,Ilikeit.

Theentiregroupundoubtedlycaughtontoushookingupwhenheheldmyhandtohelpme

intothewater,butnoonesaidathing,likeit’snormal.

“No,Merrittsaidhewastakingussnowmobilingtomorrow,”Arishouts,andIglanceupathim

withasmile.

Whatasweetgesture.

“Iam,”hetellseveryone.

“Didyougetitbooked?”Ariasks.

“Absolutely,weneedtoleaveataboutten.”

As everyone goes back to their conversations, Merritt whispers into my ear, “I didn’t book it

yet.Igotalittlepreoccupiedwithyourmouthandthatsweetpussyofyours.”

Mycheeksblushlikeaschoolgirl’s,andIlookathim,turnedonagain.

Hetakeshishandandslidesitinsidemybikini,rubbingmyclitwithhisfingers.Mybodyheats

fromthefrictionandthesteamofthewater.“Nothere,”Itellhim.

Hepouts,stickinghisbottomlipout,andIkissit.Thegroupmustbewatchingus‘causetheyall

whistleandcheer.Ismileandleanmyheadbackalittleembarrassed.“Don’tstop!”Ariyells.

Merrittliftsmychin,bringingmyeyesuptohisandkissesmeagainashepullsmeontohis

lap. With my fingers laced behind the back of his head, I stay up to my neck in the water and zone

everyoneelseoutfocusingonlyonMerritt.Onthemovementsofhistongueandthewayhishandson

mybodymakemewanttodothingsI’veneverdreamedofdoing.Likelettingamansitmedownon

acouchashefuckedmymouthandthencameonmyface,thewayhedidearlier.

I’mnotsayingI’maprude.Butwhenitcomestosex,myexperiencehasbeenveryvanilla.A

littleforeplay,thenyourtypicalpositions.Nothingroughoroutoftheordinary.Imean,justtheway

hebentmeovertonightandfuckedmesoharduntilIcamewasunreal.

Heslowsthekiss,ourforeheadsrestingagainstoneanotherashesays,“Comeon,let’sgo,or

I’mgonnaendupfuckingyourighthere.”

***

My heart is throbbing as Merritt kicks the bedroom door closed, a feeling I’m familiar with,

andIbegintoworrythatthiswon’tstopattheendoftheweek.Butithasto.I’mnotreadyforanother

relationship.Merrittisgreat;hereallyis,but…itcanonlybeaboutthesexforbothofoursakes,and

I’mstartingtofeelmoreforhimwhenIshouldn’tbe.

Hesetsmywetbodydowninthebathroomasheturnstheshoweron,andIblurtout,“Promise

meattheendoftheweekthiswillend?”

He looks back, caught off guard and a little confused, and responds, “Yeah, why would you

thinkitwouldn’t?”Ilookaroundthebathroom,searchingwithinmyselfforthewordstosaytohim,

andhecupsmyface.“What’sthematter,Quinn?”

“Nothing,justpromisemethatattheendoftheweek,thiswillend.”

“Youknowitwill.Weliveintwodifferentstatesandleadcrazybusylives.”

Inodregisteringhiswords.“Wegood?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. Now don’t ruin this moment. Remember what you said when I met you?” I shake my

head, only able to remember him walking in on me shirtless and the feeling of sheer shock that a

stranger saw me half-naked. “You told me, ‘This vacation is about unwinding and letting go.’ Now

that’swhatyouneedtodo.Giveintowhatyourbodywantsandstopworryingabouttherest,okay?”

Inodashetakesbothofhishandsandcupsmycheeks,studyingmylipsbeforeheleansinto

them and kisses me. The gesture is so tender and sweet that I melt into him, letting all my fears of

betrayalandhurtwashaway.

Thiswon’tgopastthisweek;itwon’t.

Slowly, he takes one of his hands and slides it down my body, untying my swimming suit at

everypointwhereit’sknotted.Asitfallsfrommycoldskin,Istandnaked,andheremoveshisshorts

joiningme,hiscockbobbingasitspringsfree.

Then he steps into the shower, and I gladly follow. His dark brown eyes glimmer in the low

lightofthebathroomandItrytolistentohiswords.Lettinggoofalltheshitthathashappenedtome,

that’smademesoguarded.Thisisjustaweekofsex,andthat’sit.

ThewarmwaterpeltsmyskinasMerritttakeseachofmybreastsintohishandsandlicksthe

nippleofoneandthentheother.Iknotmyfingersintohishairandreachforhiscockwithmyother

hand,grippinghimhardaroundthebaseofhisshaft.HegroansfrommytouchandasIbegintojerk

myhand,pleasinghim,hepullsmybodytowardshisandthenslidesinsideofme.

“OhGod,”Icryout.

“Letmehearyou,”hecommands,andImoanintohisear,makingsurethatIkeepmynoises

undercontrol,sotherestofthehousedoesn’thearastheywereobviouslyinterestedinwhatwewere

doing.Aswestandfucking,hisbigcockrubbingmerightwhereIlike,Ifocusonlyonthepleasure,

becausethatiswhatthisisallabout.

Chapter14

Merritt

With Quinn’s hands wrapped tightly around my waist, we fly through the forest, leading the group

backtothelodgefromoursnowmobilingtrip.

It’sbeensuchafunday,lotsoflaughsandgoodtimes.Isomehowwasabletofindaplaceto

bookuslastminute,andI’mgladIdidbecauseit’sbeenthemostfunwe’vehad.

Withthelodgeinsight,Ipullthethrottleallthewayback,knowingwhoevermakesittherefirst

wins.Butbehindus,Ihearsomeruckus.Releasingmygrip,IglancebackandspotAriflyingthrough

theair.

Oh,fuck!

Immediately,Ihitthebrakes,andweskidtoastop.He’slyingonhisback,heavingforair.Ican

hearitfromfiftyfeetaway,andIpanic,notknowingwhattodo.Noneofushavecellphones,then

Quinn,thinkingquickly,says,“I’llruntothelodge.”AsfastasIcan,Igotomyfriend’ssideashe

liesonthesnow,gasping,hisfacestrained…hecan’tbreathe.

“Shit,man,areyouallright?”

He’swincing;hiseyestightlyclosedasherollsbackandforthinpain.Willowrunsovertous,

followedbytherestofthegroupandshe’sfreakingout.“OhmyGod!Areyouokay?”

Hedoesn’trespondtoeitherofus,andIfeelfuckingterriblethatmydumbideadidthistohim.

“Justhangon.Quinnwenttogethelp.”

His breathing sounds horrific, his face keeps getting redder and redder, and I shake my head

wantingtohelphim,butnotknowinghowto.“Calmdown,Ari,”Willowsaystohim,andhesnapsat

her.“Itfuckinghurts!”

Dammit,I’msofuckingpissedthatIcameupwiththisstupidassidea.

Quinncomesbackovertouswithafewguysfromtherentalshop,andastheykneelaround

him,weallbackaway.“Thankyou,”Itellher.

“Ofcourse,isheokay?”

“I’mnotsure.”

Shewrapsherhandaroundmine,squeezingmyfingerstightly.Herwarmthcomfortingmein

thisfuckedupmoment.AsIstandholdingherback…wejustwatch.

An ambulance pulls up at the lodge, and a few paramedics rush over to us. One of them is

carryingabodyboard.

Ihateseeingmybestfriendinpain.Itmakesmesick.Thisismyfault.Thetalltreesspinand

snowwhipsthroughtheairasIstandcompletelyfrozen.

Ari and I might fight like brothers, but that is because we are brothers. Maybe not through

blood,butheismybestfriend.Myguttightensinfearwatchinghimgetstrappeduptotheboardand

thengetcarriedaway.

Willowisclosebehind,andweallfollowthem.Finally,Iaskbeforetheambulancedoorsclose,

“Ishegoingtobeokay?”

“Hewillbe.Itlookslikehehasacollapsedlungfromtheimpactofthecrash.Weneedtoget

himtothehospitalquickly.”

Willow looks at me from the back of the ambulance, and I could punch something, so pissed

thishappened.Thentheyaregone.“Comeon.”Quinntugsmyhand,pullingmetowardsthecarand

inadaze,Igetinside.

“He’sgoingtobeokay,”shetellsme.

Inod,listeningtoherwords,tryingtobelievethemasTeddrivesusaway.

***

Afterwhatseemslikehoursofwaitingforanupdate,Willowfinallywalksout.Quinn’shandis

stillwrappedaroundmine,andIdon’tdareletitgo.Thecomfortofholdingontoherhasmademe

notlosemymindwhilewe’vebeenwaiting.

“Howishe?”

“Hehasacouplecrackedribs,onethatpuncturedhislungandwasmakingithardforhimto

breathe,buthe’sgoingtobeokay.”

ThankGod.

“Canweseehim?”Iask.

“He’sresting,theyhavehimonatonofdrugs.Hesaidforusalltogohomeandgetdrunk,for

him.”

“Thatsoundslikehim,”Tedsays,andQuinnkissesmycheekasIletoutabreathofairthatI

feellikeI’vebeenholdingontoallday.

“Merritt?”Willowsays,asweallstandandpreparetoleave.

“Hesaidtotellyouhe’llpayforthesnowmobile.”

“No,fuckthat.Idon’tcareaboutthemoney.Ishouldn’thavebookedthetriptobeginwith.”

Shesmilesandsays,“Don’tthinklikethat.Wehadfun.”

“Yeah,butlookatAri.”

“He’llbefine,andyoudidn’tmakehimcrash,hedid.He’sreckless,andwebothknowit.It’s

howhelives.”

“Thanksforsayingthat,”Itellher.

“It’sthetruth.”ShegivesTedahugandkiss.

“Doyouwantmetostay?”Iaskher,“Idon’tmindatall.”

“No,yougobacktothehouseandrelax.”

“No,yougo.Letmestay.”

“Areyousure?”sheasksme.

“Yeah,ofcourse.”

“Okay,he’dprobablyratheryoubehereanyway.Heshouldbereleasedinthemorning,soI’ll

bebackearly.Thankyou,Merritt.”

“Absolutely.”

StillholdingontoQuinn’shand,Ilookdownatourfingersandbringthemtomylipsasher

blueeyeslookdeepintome.“Gogetsomerest,sexy.”Sheblinksafewtimesbeforeoffering,“Ican

staywithyou.”

I smirk. “Look at you; Miss This-Can-Only-Last-A-Week doesn’t want to be away from me.”

Shepullsherhandaway,andIkisshercheek,thenwhisperintoherear,“Ifyoustayed,I’dhaveto

fuckyou,andIdon’tthinkAriwouldappreciatethat.He’dwanttojoinin,andI’mnotabouttoshare

you.”

Shenodswithasmile,andIbreatheherscentinonefinaltimeandthenrealizethateveryoneis

watchingus.“Bye.”

“Goodbye,”shesaysback,lickingherbottomlipknowingjustwhatthatdoestome.

“He’sinroom110,”Willowgivesmeahugandthentheyareallgone.MyeyesareonQuinn

foraslongasIcanseeher,andthenIshakemyhead.Justaweek,Iremindmyself…that’sit.

WalkingtofindAri,Ifollowthesignstotheroomsfrom100-119.AsIstandinhisdoorway,he

isasleep,andasquietlyasIcan,Istepinside.

Helooksupatmerightaway,hiseyesglossyandtired.“What’sup,man?”

“Notmuch.Howyoufeeling,Spiderman?”

Hechuckles.“Soreasfuck,butthemedicineishellagood,andmynurseisfuckin’smoking.”

“Yougonnahitthatshit?”Iteasehim

“Iwish.Icanbarelybreathe.Where’sQuinn,sheletyouoffyourleash?”

Igivehimthemiddlefinger.“Youknowme;nowoman’sgonnatiemedown.”

“Idon’tknow;youseemtolikethatone.”

“She’scool,sexwithherisoffthecharts,butwealreadyagreedtothingsbeingjustthisweek.”

“That’sgood,man,yougottafocusonwork.It’snotlonguntilyouownthatcompany.”

“Ican’twait,Ari.Youhavenofuckingidea.”

HiseyesgetheavyasIcontemplatehowthosewordscouldneverbemoretrue.Ican’twaitfor

thedaymydadturnsthecompanyovertome.Ideserveit,anditcan’tcomesoonenough.I’veputup

withmoreofhisshitthananyonereallyshould,andI’vesacrificedmorethanI’dliketoadmit.Butin

theend,I’llhaveitall.

Chapter15

Quinn

“Can’tsleep?”Kamiasksme,walkingdownstairsasIgazeatthelastoftheembersofthefire.

“No.You?”

“Meneither.Jacobistossingandturningandtalkingandsnoring.”Ilaughattheimageandtell

her,“Grabaglass,comejoinme.”

Shelooksatthebottleofwineonthetableinfrontofme.Bringinganemptyglassover,she

fillshersupandtakesaseatnexttomeonthefloor.

“Whyareyouup?”

I hand her Merritt’s iPad which I used to check my email, and unfortunately there was a new

messagefrommyex.Asshereadstheemail,shegrimacesandthensetstheiPaddown.“Whydon’t

youblockhisemail?”shequestionsme.

“Ihave,andhejustkeepscreatingotherbogusnewones.”

“Thenchangeyouremail.Youdon’tdeservetobespokentothewayhedoes.”

“I guess a part of me was hoping that he’d see I blocked him and know how hurt I was and

apologizeforeverything.”

“Quinn,guyslikehimdon’tsaytheyaresorry.They’reonehundredpercentassholes,andyou

needtostayaway.”

“I hear ya, Kami.” Her words make sense. But a part of me still misses what we had. It might

havebeenashort-livedromance,buthewasreallysweetandgoodtome.Untilhewasn’t.

“Whatareyouthinkingabout?”sheasksme.

Swallowingalargegulpofwine,Itellher,“ThatIneedtopickbetterguys.”

“LikeMerritt?”

Ishakemyhead,butshecanseethatjustbysayinghisname,Igetlostinthoughtsofhimtoo.

“Youlikehim,don’tyou?”

“No,Ilikesleepingwithhim,butthat’sit.”

“Sure,Quinn.”Sheclearlydoesn’tbelieveme,butshealsodoesn’tprobefurther.Regardless,

hercommenthasmyheadspinning.DoIlikehim?IstheremoretowhatIamfeelingwithhimthan

justsex?Isthatwhatallthisisabout?It’snotthatIwantmyextoapologizeorforanythingwithhim

towork,maybeIwantthingswithMerritttowork.Jesus,thisisallsofrustrating.Eveniftherewasa

way, I couldn’t give in to it—we live so far apart and are both basically married to our careers.

Neitherofushastimeforanythingelse,especiallyarelationship;thatmuchisblindinglyclear.

“Merrittisagooddistraction,I’mhavingfunonthistrip,butit’snothingseriousandwon’tlast

pastthisweek.”

“But,whatifitdid?”

“It won’t, Kami.” I refill my glass and top hers off. “Enough about me, how are you and

Jacob?”

“Allright.We’regood;he’sbeentryingreallyhard.”

A few months back Kami and Jacob went through a rough patch, she was feeling a total

disconnect from him and finally confronted him about it. He blamed it on the stress of work, and I

guessmadeachange.IthinkJacobisagoodguyandreallylovesher,hejustneededarealitycheck.

Sometimeswealldo.

Igotitwhenmyexbrokeupwithme.Itwasaclearsigntostayawayfrommen.Theyaren’t

good for anything, except their dicks, which in turn reminds me, I could use Merritt’s right about

now.

***

Dammit,Idranktoomuch.

Ihaven’tevenopenedmyeyesyet,andIcantellit’sgoingtobebrutal.Takinginadeepbreath.

Istretchandthenblinkafewtimes.TheimageofMerrittstartlesme.“Whatthefuck?”

“Sorry,”herespondsinnocentlysittingontheedgeofthebednexttome.

“It’sokay.Wereyouwatchingme?”Iask.

“No!”Herubsthebackofhisneck,undoubtedlylying,“Ijustsatdown.”

“How’sAri?”

“He’sgood;he’shere.”

“Really?Thatwasfast.Whattimeisit?”

“Two.”

“Intheafternoon?”

“Yeah,haveyoubeenasleepsincelastnight?”

“Uhhh,Ifellasleepataboutthree.”

“Damn,stayingupthatlate,Icould’vefuckedyousomanytimes.”

Igetuptopeeandknowlateronthat’sallwe’llbedoing.“Niceshirt.”

IlookdownandrealizethatI’mwearingoneofhist-shirts.Imust’veputitonwhenIwasdrunk

andstumblingintobed.

“Thanks,I’mkeepingit.I’mgonnashowerandtrytowakeup.”

Turningonthewater,Ipopafewaspirinfrominsideofmymakeupbagandlookbackatmy

palereflectioninthemirror.God,Ilooklikeshit.

Gettingintotheshower,Itrytowashawayallofmyworriesandthefuckedupthoughtsthatare

stillgoingthroughmymind.

Chapter16

Merritt

I go to follow Quinn into the bathroom because I need to fuck her and now, but my iPad stops me

deadinmytrackssittingonthecouchintheroom.Ileftitinmybag,sowhyisitout?Igrabitand

openitup.

Onthescreenisanemail:

To:

QWhitmore4379@new-mail.com

From:

cj123768@new-mail.com

November3,2016,1:15am

Quinn,

Icanseeyoublockedmyemail,why…I’mnotsure.Well,letmeassureyouthiswillbemy

lastonetoyou.You’llneverseemeagain;I’mdonewithyou.I’mnotsurewhyIwastedmytime

withyourstupid,immature,fatassinthefirstplace.Obviously,ImadetherightdecisionwhenI

letyougo.EverythingIevertoldyouorpromisedyouwasalie.Ihopelifescrewsyouover,the

wayyoudeserve,webothknowyouwereonlywithmeformymoney.Gofuckyourself,Quinn!

Reading the hateful email again, I am in shock. What kind of a cruel person would speak to

anyonelikethat,especiallyawoman?Quinnisamazinganddeservestheworld.Sheisnotfat,stupid,

oranyofthethingshecalledher.

Clicking“reply”tothemessage,mybloodissohotasIcontemplatearesponse.

To:

cj123768@new-mail.com

From:

QWhitmore4379@new-mail.com

November5,2016,2:18pm

Whenyouhitsend,youshouldbemorecarefulofyourwords.I’mwithQuinnnowandjustread

youremail.Obviously,Icantellrightoffthebatthatyouareafuckinglunatic.Whatawaytotalktoa

woman—no wonder she found a real man. Let this be a warning that if you ever try to contact her

again,inanyway,orupsether,Iwillpersonallyfindyouandmakeyoufuckingpayforit,thewayyou

deserve!Nowgofuckyourself,youprick!

Withouthesitation,Iclick“send”andlogoutofheremail.ThenItakeadeepbreathandstrip

naked,findingherjustgettingoutoftheshower.“Iwasgoingtojoinyou.”

“Maybelater,”shesays,withthemostgorgeousexpression.SwiftlyIkissher,thengetintothe

showermyself.“Sodidyoumissmelastnight?”IaskherasIbegintowashmyself.

“Maybe.”

“Damn,whyyougottabesocold?Imissedyou.”

“Really?”

“Uhhuh.Whatdidyoudowithoutme?”

“Playedspinthebottleandmadeoutwitheveryone.”

Iopentheshowerdoorandglareatherasshecombsherwethair.“I’mjoking,”shesays.

“Please,don’tfuckwithmelikethat.Idon’tsharewell.”

ShesmilesandnodsasIclosethedoor.

“IgotdrunkwithKami,andwejustchilled.”

“That’scool.”Shedoesn’tbringupherexemailingher,andI’mnotsureifshewould.Imean,

we’renottogether,eventhoughItoldhimwewere.ButIwanthertoknowthatI’mhereforherno

matterwhatorhowfuckedupthesituationis.

“How’sAridoing?”sheasksme.

“He’s good. You know how he is…he’s a funny fucker; there’s not much that can bring him

down.”

“Notevenspendingthenightinthehospital?”

“Nah,hewaslaughingthewholeaccidentupanddigginghisnurse,whoinmyopinionwaslike

afouroutofaten.Ithinkthepainmedshadhimseeingshitorsomething;itwasfunny.”

“Youcanalwaysguaranteethathe’llmakeyoulaugh.”

“True.” I get out of the shower and right as I open her towel, there is a knock on the door.

“Seriously?IfeellikeI’mlivingathomeagain.”Shegrabshertowelfrommygripandwinksatmy

cockassheslipsoutoftheroom.Dryingmybody,Ithinkofthosehatefulwordsthatmakemewant

tofindtheguybehindthemandsmashhisfacein.ButIremindmyselfofwhatshewants,andit’sjust

thisweek…nothingmore.Soit’snotmyplace.

***

As I sit back driving Quinn’s car to pick up dinner since Ari can’t go out, I can tell she is

watchingme.“What?”Iask.

“Nothing.” She looks out the other window, and I spot the restaurant up ahead. There is a

parkingspotonthestreet,andIsnagit,parallelparkingherJeep.“Youwanttowaitinthecar?”Iask.

“No,Iwanttocome.”

Webothgetout.Thechillintheairisprettyrough,andIwrapmyarmaroundher,pullingher

bodytightlytomineaswewalkalongthesidewalk.“Thanksfordriving,”shetellsme.

“Ofcourse,anytime.I’msorryyouhaveaheadache.”

“It’sokay;it’llgoaway.”

IopenthedoortothelavishrestaurantthatWillowordereddinnerfromandthehostessgreets

usandthenasks,“Justtwoofyoutonight?”

AsmuchasI’dlovetotakeheroutonarealdate,that’snotwhywe’rehere.“Uhh,no.Wehave

apickuporder.”

“What’sthename?”

“It’sunder‘Willow.’”

Thegirllooksatthecomputerscreen,totallylost,andIglanceatQuinn,givingherthatlook.

“Umm, it looks like the kitchen is just starting on your order now, would you mind waiting

abouttentofifteenminutes?”

“Okay,”Irespond,thechatterandcommotionsoloud,I’mnotevensureifsheheardme.

Quinn and I sit on a bench by the door; she rests her head on my shoulder, and I tell her, “I

really hate it when people ask me if I’d mind waiting. What I want to say is, ‘Do I have another

choice?’”

Shelaughsalittleandthenresponds,“Metoo.”

The noise somehow gets louder in here, I can tell it’s hurting her head by the way she’s

squintinghereyes,soIdirecthertostand,andweheadoutside.

“Whydon’twewaitinthecar?”Itellher.

“Okay,”shesaysandaswewalkbacksomethinginthewindowofoneofthestorescatchesher

eye. She does a double take, and I try to see what it is, but there’s so much in there that I can’t tell.

“Let’sgoinside,”Ioffer,andshesmiles.

Walking into the long and narrow store, the atmosphere is calm, and the lighting is bright,

showcasingtheshelvespackedfullwithsomuchcrap.Thishasgottobeatouristhotspotforsure.

Quinngoesrightforthewindowandtouchesathin,elegantsilverbraceletwithsomesortofacharm

onit.

“Thatit?”Iask.

“Yeah. For my sixteenth birthday, my parents got me a bracelet just like this, and I wore it

everywhere.”

Icantellbythemonotonetohervoice,thatshenolongerhasit.“Whathappenedtoit?”

“I don’t know. I had it one day, then it was gone the next, I have no clue where it went. I’ve

searchedforyears,andit’snevershowedup.”

Islideitoffthejewelryholderandplaceitonherwrist.Shelooksdownatitwithasmile,so

genuineandhappy.“Getit,”Itellher.

“Idon’thavemywallet.”

“I’llbuyitforyou.”

“No,Icouldn’t.”

“It’snobigdeal,please.”

Sheflicksthetinycharmthatisshapedlikeaboxandsaystome,“CanIpayyouback?”

“I’dratheryoudidn’t.”

“That looks gorgeous on you,” the store clerk comes up and says. “Thanks,” Quinn tells her,

andtheclerkasksus,“CanIhelpyoufindanythingelse?”

Reachingintomypocket,Igrabmycreditcardandpassittothewoman,“Nope,justthis.”

The woman walks off to ring the bracelet up and Quinn wraps her arms around my neck,

kissingmegently.“Thankyou,I’llrepayyou.”

“You’rewelcome,andno,youwon’t.”

Chapter17

Quinn

“You didn’t tell me you found your bracelet,” Willow exclaims as I find myself playing with it the

wayIalwaysusedto.

“Ididn’t.Merrittboughtitformetonightwhenwewerewaitingfordinner.”

“Really?”

“What?YouthinkI’mnotcapableofbuyingherthings?”hechimesin.

“No,that’snotit.I’msurprisedsheletyoubuyit,beingMissIndependentandall.”

“Oh,shewantedtopaymeback.Sheevengotallstupidaboutitwhenwegothome,butIputher

inherplace.”

Ilookathim,andhewinksatme.Ididgetalittleupsetwhenherefusedtotakemymoneyonce

wereturnedtothehouse,butIdidn’tthrowafit.

“Didyouputawishinityet?”Willowasksme.

“No,I’mstillthinkingonit.”

“Wish?”Merrittasksme.

“Yeah.You’resupposedtowriteawishdown,folditupandplaceitinsidethebox.”

Merrittnodshishead,andaswelookatoneanother,Ifindmyselfthinkingaboutmywishand

whatit’dbe.WhatdoIreallywantinlife?JustthenAriemergesandslowlywalksdownstairs.“You

shouldn’tbeup,”Willowsays,runningtohisside.

“I’mfine,”hebrushesheroffandtriestomakehiswaytothecouch,butsheturnshimaround

and walks him right back to bed. “Night, Ari,” we all yell and he flips us off. He’s obviously

strugglingbeingstuckinbed.

“I’mturningintoo,”Itelleveryoneasmyheadisstillgivingmeadullthrobbingpain.

Walkingupstairs,Iliedownonthebed,closingmyeyes,hopingbymorningthatmyheadfeels

better.AsIliethere,IfindmymindisonMerritt.Heissosweetandcaring,whichisthelastthingI

expectedhimtobe.He’snotlikeanyothermanthatI’vebeenwith.Ihatethatwe’veonlygottwodays

left,soIwanttomakethemostofit.

Quietlyheenterstheroom.

“Night,guys,”Willowsayswalkingby.

“Night,”webothrespondandIlookoverathim.Hehasabottleofwaterinhishandandpasses

ittomeashesitsdown.

“Youfeelinganybetter?”

“Notreally,”Itellhimandtakeasmallsip.

Hepullshisshirtoverhishead,andmyeyesaredrawntohisamazingtattoos.Thesebedsare

sosmall,asheclimbsinbehindmewebarelyfit.ButI’vegrowntolikesnugglingtogetherwhenwe

sleep.Wrappinghisarmstightlyaroundme,Iclosemyeyes.Theroomisverytranquil;thewarmth

ofhisbodyalongmineissocomforting.

“Whatareyougoingtowishfor?”heasksme,touchingthesmallboxonmybracelet.

“I don’t know yet,” I answer him honestly. My mind is sending me so many mixed signals,

making me feel things with Merritt that I never imagined I would. But I push them away to protect

myself,theonlywayIknowhow,thewayIpromisedmyselfIwouldaftermylastbreakup.

IstayinthismomentbecauseI’velearnedbetterthananyonethatthesetwodayswillflybyand

assoonasweleavehereandgoourseparateways,he’llforgetallaboutme.Iremindmyselfhe’s

probablynodifferentthantheothermenI’vebeenwith.Evenifheseemsdifferentnow.

***

Wakingup,thesunisbarelylightingthemorningsky,andIhavetopee.Merrittissoundasleep,

still holding my body tightly against his. Gently, I kiss his arm, then lift it and slip out of his hold.

Lookingbackatthewayhestretchesinthetinybed,it’sobvioushislargebodyiswaytoobigforit.

Traipsingintothebathroom,Irealizethatmyheadnolongerhurts.ThankGod,Idon’tthinkI

could’veenduredanotherdayofpain.AfterI’mdonepeeing,Iwashmyfaceandthengobackinto

thebedroom,butMerrittisnolongerinbed.

I glance around the room and before I can spot him, his arms are around me. He’s standing

behindme,hislargecockreadyandhardforme.“Morning,”hesays,hisvoiceroughasheguides

metositonthecouch.Ilookupathim,starknakedandsofuckinghot.Hetakesthesashoffofoneof

thecurtainsandplacesitovermyeyes,awakeningallmyothersenses.

Forcefully,hetightensitbehindmyheadandasksme,“Doyoutrustme?”

“ShouldI?”Iaskhiminreturn.

“Ihopeso.”

Thenhedirectsmetolieback,myeyesfightingtoseewhatheisdoing,buteverythingisdark.

Takinghisfingers,heslidesthembeneaththesidesofmypantsandshimmiesthemdownmylegs;

thenheremovesmyshirt.Myheartispounding,eagerforwhathehasinstore.

Hishandsareonmybody,touchingandteasingmytenseskinbeforehespreadsmylegswide

andsettlesbetweenthem,blowingacoolbreathofaironmywetpussy.Hesays,“Mmmm,yousmell

likeheaven.”

IurgemyhipstowardshimasItrytolookthroughthesash,butIcan’tseeathing.Heseparates

mypussyandwrapshislipsdownaroundmyclit.Rightaway,Itense,andhebeginstokissandflick

backandforthwithhistongue,pleasingme.

I moan loudly, and he covers my mouth, quieting me, but not breaking our contact. As he

pleasesme,Ifightwhatheisdoingnotwantingtogiveoversofast,butanintenseorgasmhitsme

automatically, causing him to push hard against me, pulling it out of my system, like it’s his to

control.Mymufflednoisesarequietedbyhishandashecupsmymouthalittleharder.

Mybodystopspulsating,andhepullsaway.Iwaitforwhatisnext,andhebeginskissingme,all

over.Myfingersareknottedinhishairlovinghowhislipsfeelonmybody.“Youtastesogood,”he

tellsme.

“Let me taste you,” I tell him, and he doesn’t answer. Instead he continues kissing me. Even

thoughIjustcame,mybodyishornyandeagerforhim.Iallowhimtotakehistime,dousingmewith

affection,andthenhestopsandnudgeshiscockagainstmylips.Iopenwide,takinghimin,wishing

thatIcouldseehim,butalsolikingthewaytheblindfoldhasmelostinaworldwhereonlyMerritt

andIexist.

Imoanagainsthisshaft,grippingthebaseasIsuckhim.Everycontourofhisrigiddicketches

itselfintomymemory.Hemovesslowlybutgivesmeallofhim.Igripharder,andhedoesn’tlast

long before he pulls away. I lie there, breathless and panting, wanting more of him. “Why did you

stop?”IaskandbeforeIcananswer,he’sinsideme.Hishandsholdmylegsopenwide,soourbodies

blendclosetogether.Hemovesinandoutofme,causingeveryfiberofwhoIamtofocusonlyonthe

pleasureandasIgetlostinthismoment,heasksme,“Doesthishavetoend?”

Icontemplatehowtoanswerhim,andslowly,lifttheblindfoldoffofmyeyes.Helooksatme,

sowantonlyandeventhoughI’mscared,Idon’twantittoendeither.Butdeepdown,webothknowit

has to. It’ll never work. And if for some reason we were to force things and give it a try, I’m not

ready. I’m damaged and need to fix myself before I can even think I’m emotionally able for a

relationship.

Chapter18

Merritt

AfterQuinnandIfuckedthismorning,she’sbeenquiet…moredistant,andIknowit’sbecauseofthe

questionthatIaskedherthismorning.IknewIshouldn’thavesaidanything;itwasintheheatofthe

moment,andIletmymouthspeakwhatIwasfeeling.Shecouldn’tevenanswerme;shejustshook

herhead,andnow…everythingfeelsdifferent.

She agreed to a week with me, and that’s it. So I’ve gotta let go of any thoughts I’m having

aboutwantingmore.Plus,whoamIkidding?Idon’thavetimetodate.Ibarelyhavetimeformyself

whenI’mhome.

“I’mgonnagoforawalk,”shesays,grabbingherscarfandgloves.

“CanIjoinyou?”Iask,wantingtogetthingsbacktonormalbetweenus.

“Sure.”

I get dressed and meet her downstairs. Since Ari got hurt, we haven’t done much as a group,

minushangingoutatthehouse,whichisunderstandable,butattimesit’sboring.

WillowandTedarewatchingamovieonthecouchwithAri.KamiandJacobmustbeintheir

room.

As we step outside, the cold air sends a chill through my bones, and I zip my coat. We walk

down the driveway, and automatically I grab her hand, she blinks a few times, searching for her

wordsandIjustwanttotryandfixthings.“I’msorryforearlier.Ishouldn’thaveopenedmymouth.”

“It’sokay.I’msorryforhowIactedtoo.”

“Don’tbe,”Itellher.“Ishouldn’thaveaskedyouthat.Wehadanagreement,andIgotcarried

awayintheheatofthemomentand—”

“It’s okay, Merritt,” she cuts me off. “You don’t need to explain yourself. It’s not you that’s

messedup,it’sme.”

“CanIaskyousomething,Quinn?”

“Sure.”

“What’shappenedtomakeyousoscaredtodateagain?”

Shelaughsawkwardly,“Idon’tknowwhatitis,butallofmyrelationshipsalwaysendbadly.”

“Whydoyouthink?”

“Idon’tknow.Eversincehighschool,everyrelationshipI’vebeeninhasendedbecauseeither

theguyhasliedtomeorcheatedonme.”

“You know I’d never do that to you, right?” She rolls her eyes and doesn’t respond, looking

overatme.“Imeanit,Quinn.”

“YouandIdon’tevenliveinthesamestate.Haveyouevertriedalong-distancerelationship?”

“No,you?”

“Yes,mylastonewas,andI’mtellingyou,Iwon’tdoitagain.I’msorry,ithasnothingtodo

withyou.Ilikeyou,andthetimewesharetogether,butonceweareapart,I’msureyourfeelingswill

change,andlikeIsaid,I’mnotreadytodate.Ineedsometimetofixmyself.”

Thegroundbeneathusshifts,thesoundofthecrackingissoloudthatI’mnotsurewhattodo.

AndbeforeIcanreacttoherwideandscaredeyes,Irealizehowbadofanideaitwastowalkonthe

lakewefishedafewdaysagowithhowsunnyit’sbeen.

“Don’tmove.”

“Okay,”shesays,visiblyscared,buttrusting.AsIsteptomyright,theicecracks.Quinnfalls

in,herscreamsechoingoffthecanyonsurroundingus.Instinctively,Ireachforherarmsandholdon

toherasI’mnowlyingflatonmystomach.Herfaceiscontortedwithfear.“Igotyou.Igotyou,”I

tell her and know I have to get her out of the freezing water quickly. Scooting myself backwards, I

slowlypullheroutandpraythattheicedoesn’tgiveagain.

Each shift of our weight causes a thud beneath us. My heart pounds harder than I can ever

remember.Quinnisfrightened,Icanseeitinhereyes,andIpraythatIcangetusoutofthis.

Itdoesn’ttakemelong;I’vewonhalfofthebattle.Withbothofuslyingontheice,herteethare

chattering,andverycalmlyItellher,“Spreadyourlegsapartandscoottotheedgeoftheice,it’snot

toofar.”

“No,I’mnotleavingyouhere.”

“Goddammit,Quinn,go!”Iyellather.

Tearsfillhereyes,andshescootsawayfromme.Icanfeeleachtimeshemoves,andtheice

makes noises beneath my body. Waiting for what feels like an eternity, I can’t believe this has

happened.Thenshefinallysaysthewords.“I’mofftheice.”

Takinginadeepbreath,Icontemplategettingupandrunning.WonderingifIcouldoutrunthe

crackingice,likeinthemovies.ButIdon’tdareriskit,notwhileQuinn’sshiveringbodyiswaiting

forme.

AsIscootalong,thenoiseshavemefearingIwon’tmakeit.ButQuinn’seyeskeepmegoing,

andfinally,Imakeitofftheice.Shethrowsherselfaroundme,andIliftherwet,shiveringbodyin

myarms,joggingbacktothehouseasfastasIcan.

“Areyouokay?”Iaskher.

“Ithinkso.”Herlipsareblueandteethstillchattering.

Rushinginside,everyonelooksatus,shocked,asIburstthroughthedoorandIheadstraight

towardsourbathroom.“OhmyGod,whathappened?”Willowasks.

“Shefellthroughtheice,”Irespondandstarttheshower.Quinnisstandinginthemiddleofthe

room,clearlyinshockasherbodyistrembling.

“Shouldn’twecall911?”Willowasks.

“Shewasonlyinthewaterforthirtysecondstops;she’snotdisoriented.Idon’tthinksheneeds

togotothehospital.”

“Quinn,doyouwantmetocallanambulance?”Willowasksher,andsheshakesherheadasI

helpherundressandthengetherintotheshower.Thehotwatersurroundsherbody,slowlycalming

herchatteringteeth.

“CanIgetyousomething?”Willowasksher.

“Dryclothes,”ItellWillowandstripnakedmyself,gettinginsidetheshowerwhileWillowis

gone.

Quinn’s body shakes as I rub my hands up and down her arms, trying to help circulate her

blood. Slowly, I watch the life come back to her as the color returns to her face. Thank God, she’s

okay.I’mnotsurewhatIwould’vedonehadsomethinghappenedtoher.

“Thankyouforsavingme,”shesays,andIkissthetopofherwethair.

WithQuinninmyarms,Ihaveatightholdonher,realizinginthismomentaswestandhere

together,justhowpreciouslifeis.Todaywebothcould’vediedandthenwhat?Whatwouldthingsbe

like in a world with no Quinn and no Merritt? The thought is unsettling, and I hold her tighter and

harder.ProcessingtherealitythataftertomorrowmylifewillnothaveQuinninit,andIdon’tknow

howtodealwiththat.

Chapter19

Quinn

SittingontheedgeofthetinybedthatMerrittandIsharedforthebetterpartofaweek,I’mreally

going to miss this place. Looking at the door to the room and the spot where we first laid eyes on

eachother,IneverthoughtI’dfeelthewayIdoabouthim,buthe’sshownmesomuchandprovedto

methatmaybenotallmenarealike.

Thisweekhasbeensuchawhirlwind.Ithasflownby;frombodyshots,tobeingkissedinthe

forest,toagameofTruthorDarelikenoother,towatchingthecloudsrollby,andtothemostmind-

blowingsex,it’sallbeenthebest,andI’llalwaysholdthosememoriesclosetome.ForChrist’ssake,

hesavedmylife.

“Youready?”Merrittasksme,poppingintotheroom.

“Iam.”Itakehishand,andheyanksmeoffthebed.“I’mgonnamissyourlips.”

“Justmylips?”Iteasehimashekissesme.

“Yup…that’sall.”

Ismileandfollowhimasweheaddownstairstosaygoodbyetoeveryone.

“Thankyouforsuchanamazingtrip,”ItellAriasIhughimandunfortunatelysqueezealittle

bittoohard.Hewincesfromthepain.“Sorry.”

“It’sokay.Anytime,Quinn,youknowthat.”

Smilingbackathim,Isaymygoodbyestoeveryoneelse.“Callmeassoonasyou’rehome,”

Willowordersmeandhandsmebackmycellphone.

“Iwill.”Takingitbackfromher,IrealizeIreallydon’twantit.Thistimeawayfromobsessing

overmyphonehasbeensounbelievablyrefreshing.Butthistripisonlyaweek;nowit’sbacktothe

realworldandreallife.

“Whattimeisyourflight?”IaskMerrittasIhughimandhesays,“Two-thirty.”

“I’mgonnamissyou.”

Hecupsmyfacelookingdeepintomyeyes.“Youstillhavetodrivemetotheairport,soyou’re

notridofmeyet.”

Ismile,andwelookaroundthehouseonelasttime.Thenheadoutsidewhereweallloadupand

go our separate ways. As the other group leaves, Merritt and I sit in my car, so many emotions

runningthroughme.Firstofall,IhategoodbyesandeventhoughIonlywantedaweek,thethought

ofendingthingsherewithhimishard.Iplugmyphoneinandexhale.

Hetakeshishandandrestsitatopmykneereadingmewell,“Thankyouforeverything,Quinn.

I’mreallygonnamissyou.”

“Ofcourse.I’msorry,”Iapologizeastearsfillmyeyes.“Ijusthategoodbyes.”

“Thisdoesn’thavetobegoodbye,”hesays,andapartofmedoesn’twantthingstoend.It’snot

fairofmetoplacehiminthesamegroupasalloftheothermenI’vebeenwith.He’sdifferent;he’s

provedthattimeandtimeagain.Sowoulditbesobadtogivethingsashot?

Lookingintohissexyeyes,I’mremindedofallthethingshe’sdoneforme,fromsavingmy

life, to my bracelet, to cuddling in the world’s most uncomfortable tiny bed. To the hours on end,

we’djusttalk…aboutnothingandeverythingallatthesametime.

ButbeforeIcananswerhim,myphonechimesonandthefamiliarnoisedrawsmyeyestoit.

Tellyourboyfriendhebetterwatchhisfuckingmouthandmanupsayingwhatheemailedmetomy

face.Iblinkprocessingthetextasanother,andanotherchimecomesthrough.

“What’sthematter?”Merrittasksme.

ThefamiliarstomachchurningfeelingofbetrayalthatIhavegrowntoknowsogoddamnwell

rainsdownuponme.Howisthispossible?Whatdoesheevenmean?

“Quinn?”Merrittasksmeagainandthenithitsme.

I checked my email from his iPad when he was in the hospital with Ari. “Did you email my

fucking ex?” He shifts in his seat, visibly uncomfortable. “Did you?” I ask again, this time more

agitated.

“Idid,Isawtheemailhesenttoyouandhadto.”

JesusChrist,he’sjustlikeeveryothermanoutthere.AndjustwhenIwasbeginningtothinkthat

he was different, he’s not. I’m not even with him, and he’s already gone behind my back and done

somethingtohurtme.

“Whywouldn’tyouhavetoldme?”

“Thethingshesaidtoyouweresoawful.”

“Theyarejustwords.Itwasn’tyourplace;respondingiswhathewanted.It’sgivingintohim.I

evenblockedhisphonenumber,andhekeepsusingothernumberstocontactme.”

“That’swhyIcontactedhim—he’sabitchandneedstobeputinhisplace.”

“Youdon’tknowhim,Merritt;there’snoputtingthatmaninhisplace…trustme.”

“Icouldwithmyfist!”

“Butit’snotyourplace.Don’tyouseethat?ThisisjustanotherreasonwhyIneedtobesingle.I

don’tneedanyonemakingchoicesforme.”StartingmyJeep,Ipullawayfromthehouseandhead

towardstheairport.Idon’twanthimtomisshisflight.He’squietasIdrive.Idon’tthinkeitherofus

sawthingsendingthisway,whichisfunnybecausetherewasn’tsupposedtobeanythingbetweenus

tobeginwith.

Weknewattheendoftheweekourtimewouldendandthatisexactlywhatit’scomedownto.

Stoppingathisterminal,hereachesforthedoorhandle.Butdoesn’tgetout.Heleansoverthe

centerconsoleandcupsmycheek,hiswarmhandssosoothingagainstmyskin,butIfightthefeeling.

“Justsoyouknow,lastweekwasoneofthebestofmylife,andIwasonlytryingtohelpyouwiththe

email…Goodbye,Quinn.”

Hekissesmeonelasttimeandstupidly,Ilethim.Heignitessomanyemotionsinsidemybelly

andthenjustlikethat…he’sgone.

Thepainofwatchinghimwalkawayhurtssomuch.I’vegrowntolikeourtimetogethermore

thanI’drealized,andinaway…dependonhim.ButIremindmyselfthatwecan’tbetogether.He’s

gotabusylifeasdoI,neitherofushastimeforarelationship.

Sittinghere,IrealizejusthowlonelyofalifeIlead.Merritt’swordsthatlastweekwasoneof

thebestofhislifeisjusthowIfeel.AndeventhoughI’mmadashellathimandasmuchashesays

hewastryingtohelpmeandthoughtwhathewasdoingwasright…itwasn’t.Thetruthis,hedidn’t

tellme.Hejustsweptitundertherug.IfindsomepeaceinremindingmyselfofthatasIdrivehome.

Ifhecouldsoeasilybrushthataway,he’ddoitagainandagaininaheartbeat.Imadeadecision

tofocusonmyselfaftermyexbrokeupwithmeandthatisexactlywhatI’mgoingtokeepdoing.

***

“I’mhome,”ItellWillowassheanswersherphoneonthefirstring.

“Oh,good,wasthedriveokay?”

“Yeah,nottoomuchtraffic.”Openingthedoortomyquietcondo,everythingisasitwaswhen

Ileftit.“Youguysmakeithomeyet?”

“Almost, maybe another thirty minutes or so.” Willow and Ted live down south in Colorado

Springs,whichisaboutanhourfromme.

“All right, well, I’m gonna unpack and do some laundry before heading to my parents’ for

dinner.”

“Tellthemwesaidhi.”

“Iwill.I…Imightalsoshutmyphoneofftonight.”

“Why?”

“Myex,hekeepscallingandtextingme,Ineedabreakfromit.”

“Don’tdothat,Quinn.Putastoptoit.Callandhaveyourphonenumberchanged.”

“I’llthinkaboutit,Ipromise.Bye,babe.”

Ihangupmyphoneandthenpoweritdown.Ithinkit’scometothatpoint,whereIneedtojust

turnitoff.Andinallhonesty,Willowmightberight;Imightneedtochangethephonenumbertoo.

Evenifitisapainintheass,thecomfortofknowinghecan’tcallmewillbeworthitintheend.

Unzippingmysuitcase,IbegintosortthroughallmyclothessoIcanrunaloadofwashandI

noticethesashthatMerrittusedasablindfoldonmeistuckedtothesideofmybag.Slowly,Ipullit

outandwrittenacrossitinwhatlookslikethickblackmarkerishisphonenumber.Thememoriesof

ourtimetogetherallcomefloodingbacktome.God,wehadfun,somuchfun.Hewasamazingand

sexy and fulfilled so many desires inside me…but sadly I push them away…I have to…to protect

myself.

Tossingthesashonmybed,IletitgoandkeepmyheadonstraightasIthrowaloadoflaundry

inthewash,thenmaketheshorttriptomyparents’house.

Pullinguptoit,mymomisstandinginthedrivewaywithherhandsonherhips,whilemypoor

dadisonaladderstringingmoreholidaylightsalongtheguttersofthehouse.

“Wow,morelights?”

“Yeah,Ijustfeltlikeitneededthatlittleextraoomph,”mymomrespondsandgivesmeahug.

“It looks great. Hi, Daddy, be careful.” He curses under his breath, clearly frustrated to be

adding more lights to their already outrageous setup. You know those houses your parents would

alwaystakeyoutowhenyouwereakid,theoneswithlightsthatmusicwouldplayto?Well,that’smy

parents’house.Theygoallouteveryyearandhavenonstoptrafficdrivingbyfortheentiremonthof

December.

Asmydadcomesdowntheladder,hegivesmeahugandsaystomymom,“Isthatallyouwant

addedtotheroof?BecauseonceIputthisladderup,I’mdoneuntilJanuary.”

She laughs him off, not answering him, and it’s because she’ll want to add more or make a

changelikeshealwaysdoesandhe’llgripeandmoan,buthe’lldoit…forher.Wefollowmydadin

throughthegarageandthesecondweenterthehouse,thesmellofheramazingvegetableshepherd’s

pieinvadesmysenses.

“Imadeyourfavorite,”mymomsays.

“Icansmellit.”

“Sohowwasyourtripthisyear,dear?”Shealwayslovestohearaboutallofthethingswedo

andthegamesweplay,likeshe’svicariouslylivingthroughme.Mydadisalreadyloungedbackin

hisreclinerwatchingTVinthelivingroom.

“Itwasgood.Ihadtosharearoomwithaguy,sothatwasunexpected.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, he’s one of Ari’s friends. They used to work together.” My dad turns the TV up, still

hatingtohearmetalkaboutdatingormeninanyfashion.

“How’dthatgo?”

“Good,hewasniceand…”Itrailoff,whatamIeventryingtosay?AmIgoingtotellherthatI

likehim?WhywouldIdothatwhenwhatwehadwasonlyforaweek?Itwasaone-timething,and

nowwe’redone.

“Andwhat?”

“Ohnothing…hewasarealgentleman,heevenboughtmethis.”Ishowhermybraceletandher

eyesbeamtouchingthelocket.

“Oh,Quinn,it’sjustlikeyouroldone.”

“Itis.WefounditinastoreinSteamboat.”

“That’swhereyourdadandIgotyours.”

“Really?”

“Yes.Howniceofhimtobuyitforyou.”

“Well,Ididn’thavemywallet,andItriedtopayhimback,buthewouldn’tletme.”

“It’slovely,dear…reallylovely.”

Anditis.LookingathowhappymymomisthatI’vegotanewbraceletmakesmerealizethat

I’vegotMerritttothank.Andmaybe,Ineedherunbiasedopinionabouteverything.Sheisoneofmy

bestfriends.Itellhereverything,sosheknowsaboutmyexandwouldunderstandifItoldherabout

myandMerritt’sone-weekagreement.Shemightbeabletoshinesomeclarityonthings.

Chapter20

Merritt

It’sbeenaweeksinceIleftColorado,andIstillcan’tshakeQuinnfrommythoughts.IswearIthink

about her constantly. When I go to bed, she’s the last thing I think about, and as soon as I wake up,

she’sthefirstthingonmymind.Imissher.Imissholdingher,fuckingher,andjustbeingwithher.

I’ve never met a woman quite like her; she’s gorgeous and sweet, funny and sexy. She’s

everythingthatI’vebeenlookingfor,andunfortunately,she’semotionallyunavailable.

I’d hoped by now that she would’ve called or texted, as I left her my number…but still not a

singleword.“Mr.Smith,”myreceptionist,Suzy,chimesinthroughmyphone.

“Yes,ma’am.”

“Ihaveyourfatherforyou,onlinethree.”

“Thanks.”

Looking at the button, I contemplate not even answering it. My dad has been a real piece of

worksinceIgotback.“Hey,Dad,”Ireluctantlyanswer.

“Dammit, Merritt, why didn’t you tell me that the Serranos weren’t renewing their lease with

us?”TheSerranoFamilyisaprominentfarmingfamilyintheplainsofColoradowholeaseusover

fiftyacresofoil-producingland.

“Idid.IemailedyouaboutitbeforeIwenttoColorado.”

“No,youdidn’t.AndnowIhavetohearaboutitfromthatlittleprickofafriendofyourswho

betrayedusthathegottheirlease.YouknowhowIfeelaboutgivingArianyofourbusiness.”

“I’llfindtheemailandforwardittoyouagain,butItoldyou.”

“What’sitmatternow?They’regone.”

“Hereitis,yourexactwordswere,‘Fuck,them.Wedon’tneedtheirpiddlyfiftyacres.’SoIlet

itgo.”

“Well,youshouldn’thave.YouknowhowIcanoverreactsometimes.”

Understatementofthefuckingyear.

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I’m so aggravated. I get distracted as a new email comes

through.

“Didyoufuckinghearme?”

“No,I’msorrysomeonecameintomyoffice,”Ilie.

“IwantyoutogettheSerranosback.Understand?”hebarksatmeandhangsup.Ofcoursehe

does.It’sallmindgameswhenitcomestomydad.SoIdialAri’snumbertoevenseeifhesignedthe

dealforrealornot.

“Whatup,bitch?”heanswers,obviouslyfeelingbetterandbacktohisoldself.

“Oh,youknow,I’vejustgotmyfatherupmyass.”

“Tellmeaboutit;he’sfuckin’nuts.”

“IfIdidn’tknowbetter,I’dthinkheneededtobecommitted.”Helaughsatmycomment,andso

doI.Myfatherisalwaysthebruntofourjokes,thoughI’dneversayanyofthesethingstohisface.

“Sowhat’sup,man?YoubeentalkingtoQuinn?”

“Nah,shehasn’tcalledme.”

“Really?Mustbebusy.I’llshootyouhercontactinfo.”

“Thanks,brother.SodidyoureallysigntheSerranos?”

“Hellyeah,Idid.”

Dammit.

“Whatwoulditcostmetogetthemback?”

“Areyoukiddingme?”

“No,unfortunately,I’mnot.Hewantsthemback.”

“Fuck,man!Doeshewantthemback,ordoeshejustnotwantustohavethem?”

“What’sthedifference?”

“There’sabigdifference.Whenareyougonnalethimstopmakingdecisionsforyou?”

“Don’tevenstart,I’vehadituptomyneckwithhim,butyouknowmyhandsaretied.”

“Youbetterfuckingpaymesowellwhenyouownthecompany.”

“YouknowIwill,you’vealreadygotarunningtab.”

“Letmeseehowfaralongthepaperworkis,andI’llgetbacktoyou.”

“Thanks, man.” Ari and I hang up and right away his email comes through. Reading Quinn’s

contactinfo,Ihavetoreachouttoher.Imissher,andIwanttoknowifsheisreallydonewithme.

Wasittrulyaone-weekthingandnothingmore?

Anxiously, I go into my personal email and begin to type her a message, but the words just

won’tcomeoutright.

AsIreadtheemailagain,Itrytonotsecond-guessmyselfbeforehittingsend.

To:

QWhitmore4379@new-mail.com

From:

merritt7@new-mail.com

November14,2016,6:05pm

Quinn,

Ihopeyou’redoinggood.Imissyou.Youshouldcallmesometime.

361-555-1789.

Merritt

Chapter21

Quinn

Touchingmybracelet,Ican’tshakeMerrittfrommymind.IgothisemailasIleftwork,andIdon’t

know what to do. It’s been a week, and I’ve tried my hardest to push him as far out of my head as

possible,butmymindisstillconsumedwiththetimewesharedtogether.Mymomevenagreedthat

rightnow,Ineedtofocusonmyself…butIjustcan’tseemtodothat.

Forsomereason,he’sgotthisholdovermethatmakesmewanttobewithhimsobad.

Asmuchfunaswehadtogether,though,it’llneverbemorethanthatweekinthemountains.As

Iplaywithmybracelet,theboxpopsopen.Istillhaven’tputawishinside.Ineedto—thatisthepoint

ofthese.

AsIcloseit,Ineedtoshakehimfrommymind.He’sallI’vethoughtaboutforthebetterpartof

thislastweek.EventhoughI’mstillpissedathimforemailingmyex.

ThedoorbellringsandIgetuptoanswerthetakeoutdeliverythatIordered.

“Thankyou,”Itelltheguy,passinghimatwenty-dollarbill.

Sittingbackdownwithmybagoffood,Merritt’semailtauntsme,stillilluminatedonthescreen

ofmylaptop.IknowhelovesChinese,weordereditonenightfordinner,andheatesomuchitwas

reallydisturbing.Grabbingmyphone,Isnapapictureofthebagoffoodanddecidetotextittohim.

What’stheharminthat?There’snothingwrongwithmereachingouttoafriend,right?

Iorderedenoughforevenyou,wannajoinme?

Ihesitatesendingthetextanddecideagainstit.I’vejustgottastopthis,andasIgotodeletethe

message,Iaccidentlyhitsend.

Shit!

It’snotbuthalfaminutelater,andmyphoneisringing.Iglanceatthescreen,andsureenough,

it’shim.Iletitringforwhatfeelslikeadozentimes,myheartpounding,somanyemotionsreeling

throughme.Andthen…finally,Ianswer.“Hello?”MyvoicerattlesandIclearmythroat.

“Hi,” his voice so deep. Reminding me of when he’d whisper into my ear, making my pussy

twitch,andIlooktotheceilingwonderinghowhecanhavethispoweroverme.

“Yougotmyemail?”

“Idid.”

“Whatdidyouorderme?”heasks.

Openingthebag,Itakeeverythingout.“Let’ssee…Ihaveeggdropsoup.”

“Myfavorite.”

“Friedriceandaspringroll.”

“ShouldIbookmyflightnow?”

Igiggleathiswords.Eventhoughhe’sjoking,Ican’thelpbutwishhewereserious.

“I’mgladyoureachedout,Quinn.”

“I’mgladyoudidtoo.DidWillowgiveyoumyemail?”

He’squietforasecondandthensays,“Uhhh,no.Arigaveittome.”

“Oh…Isee.Youjustcouldn’twaitformetocallyou,couldyou?”

“Ididn’thaveachoice—it’sbeenaweek,andyoudidn’tcallme.”

“Iwantedto,butyouknowwhyIhaven’t.”

“Why?”heasksmesocalmly,makingmesaythereasonoutloud.

“Becausethingswithuswereonlyforthatoneweek.”

“But they don’t need to be.” I find myself contemplating his words, with my feet huddled

beneathme,notwantingtoeatordoanythingelsebutgetlostwithhim.

“Theydo,andyouknowwhy.”

“Idon’thavetoagreewithit,though.”

“Iguessyoudon’t,butmyexgotsupercrazyafteryouremail,andIhavetosayI’mdonewith

menrightnow.”

“Thenbedonewithmen,allofthem.Butdon’tbedonewithme.”

“Merritt,please.”

“I’msorry,Quinn.I’mtryingtorespectyouandbereasonablehere.”

“Thendon’tpushme.”

“Youtextedme,rememberthat.”Andhe’sright…Ididtexthim.AndIansweredwhenhecalled.

IfI’mgoingtobesoanti-menwhyamIeventalkingtohim?“CanIhelpatall?”heoffers,cuttingmy

mindfuckshort.

“No! No, thank you, you’ve done enough. It’s over with now. I’ve moved past it, got a new

phonenumber,andthatIthinkreallygotthroughtohimthistime.”

“I’msorryaboutemailinghimandnottellingyouaboutit;Ishouldn’thavedonethattoyou.”

“It’s all right; I get that you were only trying to help…but you don’t know my ex. He’s so

crazy.”

“Well,thankfullyIdon’t,andIdon’twantto,‘causeI’dprobablysendhimtothehospital.Could

westoptalkingabouthim?It’sreallygoodtohearyourvoice.”

“Sure,”Ilaughalittle,andheasksme,“So,how’syourdinner?”

“Ihaven’tstartedeatingyet.”

“Youshould.Idon’tmind,andyouknowIlovethesoundofyourmouth.”

“Stopit,Merritt.”

“Sorry,Iforgot,we’reonlyfriends.”Histoneisdown,andIchangethesubject.

“Howhaveyoubeen?How’sworkandbeingbackinTexas?”

“I’ve been okay. Work’s…work. It’s nice to be home right now. The weather is great, really

warm.”

“Yeah?Iwishitwerehere.It’scold,andwekeepgettingtonsofsnow.”

“You like the snow, though,” he tells me which I told him on vacation that I did. He always

listenstoeverythingIsay.

“I do, but it would be nice to have a warm day every so often. You can even go to the beach,

can’tyou?”

“Ican.Youshouldcomeandvisitme;you’dloveithere.”

“YouknowIcan’t,Merritt.”

“I’m sorry, I just miss you, Quinn, and I have a hard time thinking you aren’t feeling what I

am.”

Hiswordsbringmyworldtoahalt.I’veneverhadamanbesoopenandtalktomethewayhe

is.I’vehadguyswannaseeme,orwannagoout,orhookup.Butnoonehaseverputtheirfeelings

outtherethewayMerrittis,andIdon’tknowwhattosayorhowtorespond…

***

“You’requiet,”Eve,oneofmyco-workers,saysasIblanklygazeoutthewindowandlookat

allthepeoplebustlingbyon16

Street.

“Sorry.I’vejustgotalotonmymind.”

“Isitwork?CanIhelpwithanyofyouraccounts?”

“No,I’mfinallycaughtupfrommyvacation.”

“Speakingof,howwasit?You’vebarelymentionedawordaboutit.”

“Isyoursaladokay,ma’am?”thewaiterasksme.

“Yeah,it’sgood.CouldIhaveaboxandwe’lltakethecheck?”

“Is one check good?” he asks, looking me up and down. He’s cute, but his appraisal does

nothingtome,notthewayMerritt’scouldbringmetomykneeswithasimplesmirk.

“That’sfine.”

“Ooh,helikesyou,”Evesays,“Youshouldgethisnumber.”

Irollmyeyes,“He’snotmytype—he’sscrawny.Ineedmuscles,somethingtoholdonto.”

“Igetthat,girl.Sotellmeaboutthetrip.”Ifillherinonallthedetailsaswepayourcheckand

box up our to-go food. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me about him sooner,” she scolds me as we

makeitbackintoourbuilding.

Thewarmthissoinviting.“There’snotmuchtotell,itwasjustaweek,andnowit’soverwith.”

“Quinn,youdon’tbelievethat,doyou?”

WewaitatthebottomoftheelevatorbanksforacartoarriveandIlookherdirectlyintheeye.

“OfcourseIdo.”

Asweshuffleinside,everyonecallsouttheirfloors,andthisisoneofthethingsthatdrivesme

crazy.Whycan’tpeoplejustpushtheirnumberwhentheywalkin?EvesnickersatmeasIpushyet

anothernumber.Thenrightasthedoorsclose,someonecallsout,“Holdthat,wouldya?”

Iignorethem,butthepersonontheothersidepushesthedooropenbutton.

Seriously?Thestairswould’vebeenfaster.

And as I look up, my heart skips a beat. Dressed in a sexy ass suit with the most gorgeous

expression ever is Merritt, and his gaze is eating me alive. He squeezes in, placing his body right

alongthefrontofmineashepressesthebuttonforhisfloor,glancingbehindhim.

“Hey,”hesays,leaningdownandkissingmeonthecheek.IcansenseEve’seyesalloverus,

andIswallowsearchingformyvoice.“Hi.”SuddenlyI’mshy,buthe’snot.Everythingabouthimis

consuming me and when he takes my hand in his, holding it tightly, the comfort I felt for the week

whenweweretogethercomesrushingbacktome.I’vemissedhimmorethanIrealized.

The elevator doors open at its first stop and a few people shuffle out giving us a little more

room,butMerrittdoesn’tgivemeanymorespace.“Whatareyoudoinghere?”Iaskhim,knowing

weonlyhavealittlewhilelongertogether.

“IhaveameetingwithaclientthatAriistryingtostealfromme.”

Ofcourse,heis.

“Didn’tyougetmytexts?”heasks.

“Ihaven’tcheckedmyphoneallday.”

“Checkit.”Hecupsmycheekandtouchesmylipswiththisthumb.Ileanintohishand,getting

soeasilylostinhimthateverythingelsefadesaway.It’sasifwearestandingalone…justheandI.

The elevator dings and Eve calls me to follow her as she waits on our floor. “Room 503,” Merritt

says,passingmewhatlookslikeahotelkeycard,andIstepbackwards,notresponding,butoureyes

staylockedtogether.Helickshisbottomlipasthedoorsclose,andI’minsuchadaze.“Whatthehell

wasthat?”Eveshrieks.

“That’shim,theguyfromtheweekIspentinthemountains.”

“YousaidhelivedinTexas.”

“Hedoes,he’shereonbusiness.”

“Youalsosaiditwasaone-timething,sowhatwasthat?”

“Ihavenoclue.”Ilookdownatthekeycardinmyhand.Thenameacrossitreads,“TheBrown

Palace,”whichisonlylikethenicestandoldesthotelinthecity.Evesnatchesitfrommeandasks,

“Whatareyougonnado?

Lookingtoherforadvice,Irespond,“Ihavenoidea.”

Shegivesmebackthecardandlookslikesheisabouttopeeherpants.“Hi,Mr.Johnson,”Isay

aswepassoneoftheseniorVP’s.

“OhmyGod,Quinn.Areyougoing?”

“No!”Itellheraswesitdown.Sheglaresatme.“Idon’tknow,maybe.”Takingoutmyphone,I

checkit,andyep,thereisonemissedcallandtwomissedtextmessagesfromhim.

ImightbecomingtoColoradoforbusinesstoday,couldIseeyou?

Headingtotheairportnow…dinner?

Ifindithardtobelievethathesuddenlyhasbusinesshere.Whenwetalkedlastnight,hedidn’t

mentionathingaboutit.Hejustkepttryingtopushmetoadmittowantingmorewithhim,andwhenI

didn’t,nowthismorninghemightbecominghere.ThenwhenIdon’trespond,he’shere?Heknows

I’mnotinanyplacetodateorbewithhim.

Takingthekey,Itossitintomytrashcan.WhyshouldIgo,becausehesaidso?I’mdonebeing

toldwhattodo,asmuchasithurtstopushhimaway,I’vegottalookoutformyself,nooneelsewill.

DialingWillow,herphonegoestovoicemail,andIrememberthatsheisinclassalldaytoday.

Hangingupwithoutleavingheramessage,IcallAri.Somethingseemsoffaboutallofthis.Merritt

could’veplannedthisallalong,andIhavetofindoutifhe’slyingaboutthingsorifthisisreallya

coincidence.

“What’sup,Quinn?”

“DidyoutellMerrittwhereIwork?”

“No,why?”

“Because I just ran into him in my building, and he claims he has business here. Something

aboutgettingaclientbackyou’retryingtosteal?”

“Oh,theSerranoFamily.Theirattorney’sofficeisinyourbuilding.RememberwhenItexted

youforlunchtheotherday?Iwastheretoclosethedeal;nowhe’stryingtogetitback‘causehisold

manisafuckingkook.”

“Areyoubeingserious?”

“Yeah,whywouldIlie?”He’sright…whywouldhelie?“Hey,ifitmeansanything,Quinn,he’s

areallygoodguy.”

IhangupwithArianddon’tknowwhattodo.Isthisallmejustmakingthisshitupinmyhead?

AmIbeingparanoidbecauseofmypast?DoIletmyguarddownandjustwanderovertoTheBrown

Palaceandstripnakedbecausethat’swhatMerrittwantsandArisayshe’sagoodguy?

Workgetsthebestofme,andI’mthankfultokeepmymindbusy.Asthedayfliesby,Idon’t

know where the time has gone. Everyone around me is packing up to leave, and I feel like even

thoughI’vebeenswamped,I’vegottennothingaccomplished.MinusmakingalistofreasonswhyI

needtostaysinglethatissolongIcouldmakeabookoutofit.

“Night,”Evesays,thankfullynotaskingmeifI’mgoingtoseeMerrittagainornotandIsmile,

finishingthespreadsheetI’mworkingon.

Myphonebuzzesinmydesk,andasIglanceinside,IseeaviewofDowntownDenver.Theonly

thingthatwouldmakethisviewbetterisyou.Room503…I’mwaiting.

Islammydeskdrawerandpinchthebridgeofmynose.Whyisthishappening?Howcouldhe

be here and expect me to just drop things and run to him? He knows how I feel, we agreed to one

weekandnowhe’spushingme.Lookingatthepictureagain,Ibegintodigthroughmytrashcanand

getstartledbymyboss.“What’dyoulose?”heasks,andIshootstraightupinmychair.

“Oh…nothing,justapaper.Idon’twanttore-pullthedocsandsearchthroughthemtoreprint

it.”

“Ahh,okay.Well,Ineedafavor.WejustgotthesigneddocumentsinfortheTorrezaccounts.

They’ll be here Monday morning, and I hate to ask you, but if you could work on everything this

weekend,I’doweyou.”

“Stan,youalreadyoweme,”Itellhim.

“I do, and I’m sorry I haven’t paid you back from the last time I asked you to work on the

weekend.Youcanevendothisfromhomeifyouwant.AndI’llgiveyoumyticketstotheNuggets

gamethisweekendtoo.Willthathelp?”

“Ifyouhavethemonyounow,thenmaybe.”Hereachesintohisbackpocketandpullsouttwo

tickets.Butbeforeheletsgoofthemheasks,“You’llgeteverything,includingtheaccounts,allsetup

byMondaymorning?”

“Surewill,”Itellhim.

“Thankyou,Quinn…you’realifesaver.”Hewalksoff,leavingmewithasweetpairoffloor

seatstotheNuggetsgametomorrownight.

Withmytrashcanstillbetweenmylegs,Ilookinandspotthecardrightaway.Takingitout,I

tossitinmypurseandgrabmylaptopandotherthingsIneedtogetmyweekendworkdone,takingit

allwithmeasIleave.

Walking home, my phone rings; it’s Merritt. I’m reluctant to answer; my brain is so jumbled

rightnowbutlikeusual…Ican’tresisthim.“Hello?”

“Areyoucomingoverhereornot?”

“No,”Itellhim,waitingtocrossastreet.

“Whynot?”

“I’mspent,it’sbeenonehellofaweekback,andmybossjustgavemeevenmoreworkthatI

havetodoathomethisweekend.IthinkIjustwannagohomecrashandgetafreshstarttomorrow.”

“I’llcometoyou?I…Ijustwanttoholdyou.”

Hisofferissosweet,howcanIturnhimdown?Butthinkingaboutit,thetruthis,onceweare

alone,cuddlingwillbethelastthingwe’llbedoing.We’llfuckandprobablywon’tbeabletostop,

andwhatwillthatopenup?Ineedtothinkaboutthingsformyself,formyfuture,tomakesureIdo

what’sright…forme.

“Nottonight?”

“I’mleavinginthemorning.”

“Thentherewillbeanothertime,Merritt.”

Hedoesn’trespond,andIentermybuilding,keepingmyvoicedownasIaskhim,“Okay?”But

he’sstillquiet.Glancingatthescreentoseeifhe’sevenstillthere,he’snot.He’shunguponme.

What the fuck? Just because I need some time, he hangs up on me? How is that even fair? I

didn’taskhimtocomehere.

Chapter22

Merritt

Staringattheblankscreenofmyphone,I’maggravatedathowclosedoffQuinnisbeing.Idon’tget

whylastweekitwasperfectlyokayforustobetogetherandnowthisweekit’snot.Atthetimethat

weagreedtooneweek,Ithoughtaweekwouldbeenoughtoletmegetovermyfeelingsforher,but

itwasn't.Allitdidwasmakethemstronger.She’sgottabefeelingwhatIam;I’mnotcrazyafterall.

I’mtryingtorespectherandnotpushthings,butshewon’tevenseemetojustcuddle,andbeingthis

closetoher,yetsofaraway,isdrivingmefuckin’mad.

Refilling my glass of whiskey, my father calls me again, wanting to know if I closed the

Serranodeal.Fuckhim!Allhecaresaboutisbusiness.Hedoesn’tcareaboutmeorwhatI’vehadto

gothroughtogettheSerranosback.

Sittingonthecouchthatoverlookstheviewofthecity,itoccurstomethatI’veneverrealized

howbeautifulofacityDenveris.

“What’sup?”IanswerAri’scallonthefirstring.

“Oh,man,youbetterclosetheSerranodeal,oryouroldmanisgonnaloseit.”

“Howmuchyouthinkit’dcosttohireahitman?”Iaskhimjokingly.

Webothlaugh,andItellhim,“Inallseriousness,IthinkIsavedthedeal.They’regonnaanswer

meinthemorning.”

“Youmeanyoustoleitfromme?”

“Fuckyou;youstoleitfromme.”

Webothlaughandhesays,“SoIheardyousawQuinn.”

“Shecallyou?”

“Yup,allworkedupandshit.”

“Youshould’vewarnedmethatsheworkedinthatbuilding.”

“I’mbusy,man,Idon’thavetimetoworryaboutwhoworkswhereandcross-referenceitby

youroh-so-importantschedule.”

“Shutup,bitch!”

“Sodidyouhititagain,getinagoodnooner?”

“No,andnowshe’sbeingallbitchyaboutseeingme.”

“Who cares? She’s been hurt. You know how women are. Don’t give up on her…that’s what

she’sexpecting.”

Hanging up with Ari, I never imagined he could make so much sense. I dial Quinn’s number,

andsheanswers,“Didyouseriouslyhanguponme?”

“Noway,”Ilie.“Mycellphonedied,andIjustgotitturnedbackon.”

“Youreallydidn’thangup?”

“Nope.Sowhatareyouwearing?”

“Merritt!”shescoldsme.

Thealcoholurgesmeon,makingmeverybrave.Thisiswherewefirstconnected—sex.IfIcan

makeherseehowgoodwearetogether,eventhroughthephone,maybeIcanconvincehertogive

thingswithusashot.

“Igetthatyoudon’twanttoseeme.”

“It’snotthat.I’m…I’mscaredtobealonewithyou.Justbeingintheelevatortodaywasalot.”

“Doyoutrustme?”Iaskher,thesamewayIdidwhenIblindfoldedher.

“Yes,youknowIdo.”

“Good,nowgointoyourbedroomandtakeyourclothesoff.”

She doesn’t answer me, and I imagine her standing there stark naked, her soft white skin,

alluringandtempting.Wantingtobetouched.

“I’mnaked.”

Igetundressedmyselfandsaytoher,“Lookinthemirror.”

“Why?”

“Trustme.”

“‘Kay.”

“Doyouseethatfreckleonyourrightside,nexttoyourtit?”

“Yes.”

“Iwantyoutocloseyoureyesandimaginemylipsonit.”She’sbreathinghard,andIgrabmy

cock,knowingIcouldcomeatanymoment,butI’llwaitforher.

“Canyoufeelmylips?”

“Uhhuh.”

“Good,now,touchyourself.”

“OhGod,Merritt,”shemoans,andIhavetoletgoofmydick.Iclosemyeyes,listeningtoher

raggedbreathingandhopesheseeshowgoodwearetogether,howfuckingwellourbodiesreactto

oneanother ’s.

“Tellmewhatyou’redoing,”Icommandher.

“Touchingmyself.Ijustlaiddownonmybed.”

“Ibetyouwishmycockwasinsideyou,huh?”

“God,yes.”

“Mmm,keeppleasingyourself,baby.”

“Jesus,Iwannacome.Willyoucomewithme?”

“No…”Irespond,andshegetseerilyquiet.

“Whynot?”

“BecauseI’msavingitforthenexttimeI’minsideyoursweetcunt.Goodnight,Quinn.”

Chapter23

Quinn

Readingtheclockonmynightstandasitchangesfrom2:16amto2:17am,Ihaven’tfallenasleepyet.

All I have been doing is tossing and turning all night, my mind fighting with my body, the two

wantingcompletelydifferentthings.

AfterMerrittandImessedaroundearlierandheteasedmeandthenbasicallyleftmehanging

byathread,mybodyisajumbledmess.Ineedtoseehim,eventhoughIshouldn’t.Iwanthimone

moretime…butit’ssuchabadidea.

Shuttingmyeyes,IfightwithmybraintobequietandhopethistimeIcanfallasleep.ButallI

hearishisvoiceandthewayhecoaxedmeon.

Fuck, it seems hopeless, the clock still reads 2:17am. On my nightstand is the keycard for his

hotel.Ipickitup,spinningitaroundandaroundinmyfingers.Then,Idropitandgetup,hopingthat

maybeabathwilltiremeout.

Aftersoakingforwhatfeelslikeaneternity,itdoesn’thelpathing.Ifanything,Ifeelevenmore

awake. As I slip my sweat pants on, my clit is still twitching for him, and I’ve made my mind up. I

needtogotohim;Ineedtofigureoutthereasonforthisconstantpull.Maybeonelasttimetogether

willstopit.Slippingonmybootsandcoat,Ileave.

Idecidenottocallhim,whatisthepointofthat?Ihaveakeyafterall.Hell,maybehe’swith

someoneelselikeatypicaltravelingmanwouldbeandwalkinginonitwouldmakemebedonewith

himinaninstant.

Gettingintomycar,it’scoldandtakesafewminutestowarmup.Onthedrive,thereisliterally

nooneoutontheroads.

Thedriveisshort,andIparkmyJeeponthestreetoutsideofhishotel,thenmakeadashinside.

The old eclectic décor seems to span from floor to ceiling. I’ve never actually been inside of this

place. Looking for the elevators, I spot them, right as the desk clerk looks at me with a curious

expression.

I guess it could be because I am wearing sweatpants and pretty much look like a cute hobo. I

pressthecallbuttonandinstantlythedoorsopen.Takingthecaruptothefifthfloor,I’mremindedof

theinteractionthatMerrittandIhadintheelevatorearlierintheday.Hewassodomineering,theway

hekissedmeonthecheek,soclosetomylips,likeIwashis,andheldmyhandwhilehepressedhis

bodyrightalongmine,ignoringeveryoneelsesharingthespace.

The doors open to the fifth floor and my palms are sweaty, not really sure what I’m about to

walkinon.

Room503isattheendofthehall.AsIstandinfrontofit,Ilistenforanysoundsornoises,but

therearen’tany.Placingthekeyintothedoor,itflashesgreen,andIremoveit.

Iopenthedoorandlookaroundthedimhotelroom.TheTVisonsomeinfomercialwhichis

illuminatingMerritt’ssexy,nakedbody.

He’salone,justlikeIhopedhewouldbe.

Quietly,Iclosethedoorandlatchthelock,thentakemycoatandbootsoff,leavingthembythe

door.Walkingtothebed,Isitontheedgeofit,takingeverythingin.There’sahalf-drunkbottleof

whiskeynexttohimonthenightstand.Hemuststillbenakedfromwhenwemessedaroundearlieron

thephone.

Maybe this entire time, everything that I’ve been worrying about shouldn’t be a worry. Deep

down, I really don’t think he’s like other guys. He could have any girl in the world. Look at him:

perfectbody,gorgeousface,hugecock,andhewantsme.

Sittingthisclosetohimandnottouchinghimisdrivingmecrazy.Gettingup,Istripnaked,all

the while my eyes are on his dick. Then I hover over him, pressing his dick against my pussy as I

brushmyhairtothesideandleandownkissinghim.

“Youcame,”hesaysagainstmymouthandstretches,pushinghiscockagainstme.Hiseyesare

stillclosed,butheknowsit’sme.

Ikisshimagain,andheknotshisfingersintomyhairandflipsusover,histiredeyesfinally

waking. I relinquish all of my control, giving over to him, forgetting about all of my worries and

reservations.

“Tellmeyouwantme,”hebrusheshisnoseagainstmine.

“YoufuckingknowIdo.”

“Tellme,Quinn.”

“Iwantyou,Merritt.Iwantyouinsideme,Iwantyouto—”

“Likethis?”

Igaspashishardshaftfillsme.Hepushesmoreandmoreintome,buryinghimselfasdeepas

hecan.Withmylegsheldaroundhim,Iholdourbodiesclose,andneitherofusmoves.

Thethuddingofhisheartpulsatingthroughthetipofhisdickmakesmewanttocome.Iwiggle

myhips,andhebeginstopump,bothofusgettinglost…carriedawayinthemostamazinglyintense

orgasmsever.

That’s all it took was our connection, and we are dangling from a cloud of bliss, falling…

together.

MythroatistightasIsearchforair,andforthefirsttimewithhim,Idon’tholdback.Mynoises

aren’tquiet.Iwhineloudly,histhickshaftcominginsideofmeaswegiveovertothepleasure.

“Yes!Getloud,baby.”

Heslamsmypussy,oureyeslockedoneachother ’sashenowbraceshisweightaboveme.Our

pleasureends,butourbodiesstaytogether.Merrittisn’tinahurrytomove.Pullingthemessycovers

overus,hestaysnestledinsideofmeandasksme,“Pleasestaywithme.”

Itrailmyfingernailsupanddowntherigidmusclesofhisback,sleepalreadyinvadingmeand

Ifightit,notwantingtodriftoff.BecauseI’mremindeditwon’tbelonguntilourtimetogetherhas

to,yetagain,cometoanend.

Chapter24

Merritt

GettingdressedsoIcanheadtotheairport,Quinnisfastasleep,Ihatetowakeher,butIcan’tjust

leaveher.Lastnightwasamazing,andIdon’twanttogo,butifI’velearnedanythingwhenitcomes

todealingwithQuinn,it’stogiveherspace.

SittingontheedgeofthebedthewayIdidsoofteninSteamboat,Iwatchher.Sheawakesfrom

theweightofmybodyandyawns.“Whyareyoualldressed?”sheasks.

“Ihaveaflighttocatchinaboutanhour.”

“No,already?”

“Yes,Itoldyoumyflightleftearlytoday.”

“Don’tgo,”shebegsme,wrappingherarmsaroundmeandrestingherfaceonmythigh.

“Ihaveto,plusyouhaveworktodotoday,remember?”

“Icandoittomorrow.Pleasestay.”

“Why?”

“Because,it’sSaturdayandyoudon’thavetogointoworkuntilMondayand…oh,Ihavetickets

totheNuggetsgametonight.Comewithme—youlovebasketball.”

“Areyoubribingme?”Iaskher,andshenods,thenunzipsmypantsandtakesmycockout.The

feelingofherhandalonemakesmestiffasarock.

“Don’tdothat,”Itellher,knowingifshestartswithme,Iwon’tbeabletoleaveher.

“Stay,” she says and goes down on me. Leaning back, resting my weight on my forearms, I

watchhermouth,hersweetgoldmineofamouthstretchedsowideassheputsittogooduse.

Fireradiatesfrommyheadtomytoes.Isitstill,lettingherhaveallthecontrolandhopeifI

stay,thiscouldbethebeginningofus.

Mycumisclose,andIholdontoit,fightingthefeeling,notwantinghertoknowwhatshecan

dotomesoquickly.Thecontrolshehasovermeisunreal…butshepullsitoutofme.Takingmy

pleasureasifitwereherown.

Whenshepullshermouthaway,thefirstthingshesaystomeis,“Soyou’restaying?”

“Maybe,butifIdo,whatdoesitmeanforus?”Iaskher.

“Whatdoyouwantittomean?”

“Quinn,youknowIlikeyou,andIgetthatyou’vebeenthroughsomeshit,soIunderstandwhy

yourheartisguarded,butIwantyoutorealizeyoudon’thavetoguarditwithme.I’mnotgoingto

hurtyou…ever.”

“Iwanttobelieveyou.That’swhyI’mhere,andIwantyoutostaylonger.Idon’tknowwhatthe

future holds, hell…no one does, but what I do know is, if I keep guarding myself and living like I

have,thenImightpushawaythebestthingthat’severhappenedtome.I’msorry,Ijustfeellikemy

brainisallovertheplace.”

“It’sallright,justbehonestwithme.”

Shesmilesatmeandsays,“I’mscaredifyoustay,but…I’mevenmorescaredifyougo.”

“Then I’ll stay, and we’ll just spend the weekend together, okay?” I ask her, and she nods,

agreeing.“Good,willyouhandmemyphone,please?”

She gives it to me and walks off to the bathroom as I email my assistant, Suzy, asking her to

bookmealaterflight.

“So,you’retakingmetotheNuggetsgame?”Iaskherassheusestherestroom.

“Iam—courtsideseatstoo.”

“Wow,howdidyouscorethose?”

“Mybossowedmeforworkingonadealovertheweekend.”

“I’ll be sure to send a thank you myself. You hungry?” I ask her as she struts back into the

bedroom,starknaked.

“Icouldeat.”

“No,fuckthat.I’mnottakingyoursexyassout.I’mgonnamakeyoumysexslave.”

“Ahungrysexslaveisnotahappysexslave.”

“Okay,true.Soisthereanywherearoundheretoeat?”

“Yeah,thereareafewgoodplaces,butIonlyhavesweatstowearandyou…well,youhavethat

suit.”

“I love your sweats. Let’s go. Time is gonna fly by.” I smack her ass, and she scurries to get

dressed.Whensheisfinishedandlooksbackatmewearingathinlong-sleevedt-shirtandaredpair

ofsweatpants,Idon’tthinkI’veeverseenherlookmorebeautiful.

***

Afterbreakfast,westoppedbackbyQuinn’ssoshecouldshowerandchange.Ididn’tthinkshe

neededto,butIgetthatshewantedto.Sittingonhercouch,Iloveherplace—it’ssoperfectlyher.I

noticeastackofpaperworkthatmustbeforherwork,andIaskher,“Sowhatisitthatyouactually

doforaliving?”

“I manage people’s money. We invest in all sorts of things, from the safest of the safe to the

riskiestinvestments.Doyouhaveyourmoneywithafirm?”sheasksme.

“No,Ihaveitinthebank,withFDICinsurancecoveringit.”

“Youshouldlookintoyouroptionstoevenmakealittlereturnonwhatyouhavesittingthere.I

mean,Iwon’tdoit,notaftermylastexperience,butIcanreferyoutosomegoodcompanies.”

“What happened, like for real?” I ask her, really wanting to know how things went so wrong

withherex.

“Thestoryissocomplicated;I’mnotevensurewheretostart.”

“Thebeginning.”

“Uhhh,God,thisissoweirdtobetellingtoyou.Um,Imethimoutonenight,havingadrink

withco-workers.Attheendofthenight,wehookedup.Ileftmycardonthehotelnightstand,andhe

contactedmeforbusinesspurposes.Whenhecamein,Irealizedwhohewasandlongstoryshort,I

signedhimtomycompany.Fromthereitwasawhirlwindofaromance,untiloneday,hewasdone

withme.”

“So why did it end? Why was he done with you? He’d have to be crazy in my book to end

things.”

“Hejustbrokeitoff,outoftheblue,forreallynogoodreasonthatIcouldsee.Itmademefeel

like there was something wrong with me.” Tears fill her eyes, the pain of going back there evident

andIdon’twanttoseeherupset.“Ishould’veknownmeetinghimatabarthatitwouldn’tbeanything

long-term,butIfellforhim…likeIalwaysdo.”Pullingherintomyarms,Iholdherclose.“Well,I’m

happyitdidn’tworkoutbecauseitgaveusachance.”Shetensesinmyhold,andIcantellthatI’m

pushingthings,soIdropit.

Shedoesn’tsayanotherword,andIfearthatinthebackofhermind,shethinksIwillendup

feeling the same way. That I’ll hurt her like her ex did…but I wouldn’t. Because for me, there’s

nothingthatcouldmakemewanttoleaveherinthefirstplace…ever.

Chapter25

Quinn

“Doyoueverwishyou’dstuckwithbasketball?”IaskMerrittaswesitonthesideofthecourtbefore

thegamebegins.Theplayersareallpracticingshootinganddoingdrills.

“Nowthat’saloadedquestion.”

“Meaning?”

“Have you ever dreamt of doing something, but knew deep down it was too much of a long

shot?”

“I’llhavetothinkaboutthatone.”

Thenhesays,“Well,forme,thatwasbasketball.Itwasmylife-longdream.Ihadscoutsvisiting

meinhighschool,collegeswerelinedup,andIwasreadytotaketheleap.Dukehadofferedmea

fullride.Butattheendoftheday,Ihadachoicetomake,andmyfatherisverypersuasive.Hemade

ithardformetosaynotohim.”

“Butyouwantedtoplaybasketballmore,right?”

“Idid,butheofferedmemoremoneythanIwaslikelytogetintheNBA,andIdidn’thavethe

riskofgettingacareer-endinginjury.Healsopromisedmethecompanywhenheretires.”

“Butthatwasn’tyourdream?”

“No,itwasn’t.But,I’veadaptedandgrowntolovemywork.”

“Merritt, that’s like marrying the wrong person because your parents want you to. When you

know,it’swrong.Howcouldyoubetrulyhappy?”

“Now,now,Dr.Phil,let’snotgetcarriedaway—noone’sgettingmarried.”

He tosses his arm over my shoulder, and I lean into him, hating how terrible of a person his

fatherseemstobe.Whatkindofparentwouldtakeawaytheirchild’shopesanddreamsfortheirown

benefit?

“Youwantanotherbeer?”heasksmeasthebeervendorwalksby.

“Sure.”

He orders us two more, and the game begins. I love how into everything he is. Yelling and

screaming,abletocallfoulsandplayslikeacoachwould.Allthewhilehishandisbracingmythigh,

squeezingtighterandtighter,makingmypussywetandmybodysohorny.

It’sjusttoobadthathe’snotoneoftheplayers,‘causeheshouldbe.Icanseethepurelovefor

thegamethatlivesinsideofhim.Nomatterwhathisdaddoesorwhatcareerhechose,nothingwill

evertakethataway.

***

“Youowemeahundredbucks,”hetellsmeasweleavetheNuggetsgame.

“Youknow…IblameAriforthat;he’stheonewhomakesusalwaysbet.”

“YoucanblameJesusforallIcare,butyoushookonit,soyoustilloweme.”

“CanIpayitoffinsexualfavors?”

“Whatdoesonegetforahundreddollarsthesedays?”

“I don’t know; we can probably ask that girl.” And I point to a slutty looking woman on the

cornerofthestreetthatwecanseethroughthewindowsasweridetheescalatordown.Shelookslike

she’soutworking.

Bothofuslaughasweemergeintothechillywinternight.Walkingtomycar,Ican’tseemto

gettherefastenough,andMerrittisrightalongwithme,holdingmyhandtightly.“Fuckit’scold.”

“Yeah,itis.You’dloveTexas.Rightnow,it’smidsixtiesatnight.”

“God,I’dlovetofeelthat.”

“Comevisitmenextweekend?”

“No,Icouldn’t.”

“Sureyoucould.”

Hisoffer,asappealingasitis,shouldbeeasytoaccept.Wehavefuntogether,anditseemsI’m

thehappiestwhenI’mwithhim.Butitalsomakesmeworryaboutthings;Idon’twantustojumptoo

fast,toosoon.

StartingtheenginetomyJeep,Iturnonbothofourseatwarmers,andheasksme,“Soareyou

coming?”

“Letmelookandseewhenflightsare,andthenI’lldecide.”

“What’sitmatter?LeaveFridayandreturnSunday.I’llevenpayforit,”he’spushingmeandthe

offer,assweetasitis,makesmeworryit’llmakehimeventuallyresentme.Ithappenedwithmyex.

Heshoweredmewithgifts,somanyofthemIcouldn’tseestraight.Intheend,heuseditagainstme,

saidIwasonlywithhimforhismoney,whichisthefarthestthingfromthetruth.

“What’swrong?”heasksme.

“Nothing.”

“Don’tlie.Youcantellmeanything;youknowthat,right?”

“IknowIcan.”

Walkinginsidemyplace,hishandisaroundmine,andhe’sdroppedthesubjectofmegoingto

seehim…fornow.Ifliponafewlights,andhesaystome,“Youreallyhaveasickview.”

“Thanks,Ilovemyplace.”

WhileheobservesthesightsofdowntownDenver,Ipouruseachadrinkandthenstripnaked,

doingwhatMerrittandIdobest.

Walkinguptohim,Icanseehisreflectionintheglass.He’slostinhisownthoughts,andasI

standnexttohim,heslowlyturnshishead,asoftgrowlescapingfromhisthroat.

“Ohhh,youaresobad.”

“Youmakemewanttobebad,”Itellhimandhefinisheshisdrinkinonegulpandthenliftsme

into his arms and cradles my body against his as he storms into my room, kicking the door all the

wayopenandtossingmeonthebed.Ilaughfallingagainstthesoftfabricandwatchhimunbuttonhis

tight,navybluedressshirt.Thenhetakeshisbeltoffandsetsitonthebed,myheartbeatingfaster,

wonderingifhe’sgonnauseittospankme.

Takinghispantsoff,hismouthwatering,hugecockmakesmesowet,andheasksme,“Where’s

thesash?”

Ipointtomynightstanddrawer.Hepullsitout,thesoftmaterialrestingcomfortablyinthepalm

of his hand. “How convenient.” Then he scoots my body up on the bed and stretches my arms high

aboveme.

Takingthesash,heknotsitaroundoneoftheslatsinmyheadboardandthensecuresmywrist

totheotherendofit.Myeyesmovefrommyhandtohiseyesandheasksme,“Isthisokay?”Inod

quickly,neverhavingbeentiedupbefore,butneverwantingitmorethanIdowithhimrightnow.

Withmyotherhandfastenedinplacewiththebelt,hethentakesmebythehipsandpullsmeas

far down the bed as he can. My upper extremities are stretched to the max; I can’t move a single

muscle.Everythinginsideofmeisonoverdrive.MyheartisbeatingatMachspeed.Andhesaysto

me,“Ifyoucomevisitme,I’lltieyoutomybedfortheentireweekend,”andIhavetoask,“Whatare

yougoingtodotomenow?”

“Whatdoyouwant?”

“Iwantyoutofuckmeandcomehard.”

Hetakeshishandandbeginstorubitovermyclit.Iarchoffthebedfromthemeretouchofhis

fingersonme,andhesays,“Likethis?”

“That’sgood,butIreallywantyourcock.”

Hebeginstojerkhimself,andIlickmylips.

“Youwanttosuckme?”

“Please.” He hovers over me, holding on to the headboard and I open wide so he can stick

himselfallthewayintomymouth.Hepumpsinandoutofme,myhandsaretiedsoIcan’tmoveand

my lips stretched so wide that I can’t say a word. Our eyes stay connected, the way they always do.

“God,Iloveyourmouth,”hetellsmeandgrunts,movingevenfaster.

Mypussyistingling,readyandwillingtobeplayedwith.Butthisisn’taboutme,it’sabouthim.

Ashefucksmymouth,Iwaitforhiscum,butitdoesn’thappen.

Thenhestopsandslowlyremoveshimselffromme.Kneelingbetweenmylegs,Ispreadthem

wideasheconnectsourbodies.Mybodytensesfromthefullness;hisdickissohardasheshoves

intome.

Holdinghisbodyuponeithersideofmewithhisfistsballed,heasksme,“Whydoyoulikeit

slow?”

“‘CauseIdon’twantittoend,sotheslowerwego,thelongeritcanlast.”

“That’snottrue.”

“Whatdoyoumean?”Iaskhim,andhepullsmetowardshimbythehips,pushingintomeas

deepashecan.Igaspoutloud,asensationunlikeanyotherrunsthroughmeashiscockgrindssofar

intome.

“Letmeshowyou.Icanmakeyoucomeagainandagain,”hepromises.

Alittlehesitant,asI’veneverhadamanmakemecomemorethanonce,Inod,andhebeginsto

move. His hands have a strong hold on my body and every time he slams into me, I cry out in

pleasure.Mytitsbouncefromtheforceofhimslammingintome,hittingsuchasensitivespotinside

me,andashepicksupspeed,Ican’tcontrolmyself,lettinggoandcominghard.

Hecontrolsmybody,stillholdingontomeasherobsmeofmyfirstorgasm.Ibowoffthebed

inhisarms,fightingagainsttherestraints,searchingforsomefriction.However,Ican’tfindany,and

nowmypussyissosensitive,IfeellikeIcouldloseit,buthekeepsmoving.

“Stop,”Itellhim,justneedingaminuteandheshakeshishead,barrelingfaster.“Giveintoit,

Quinn,letgoagain.”

Diggingmyheelsintothemattress,Iloseallfocusonrealityasanotherblissfulorgasmruns

throughme.Iscreamloudly,shakingunderhiscontrolandthistimeIfigurehehastostop…butthat’s

notwhathedoes.

His eyes are carnal, his grunts are the loudest I’ve ever heard, and I look at him bewildered,

tryingtounderstandwhathe’sdoingtomybody.Thenhesaystome,“It’sokay,baby…letgoagain.”

Closingmyeyes,Itrustinhim.Zoninginonthenoisesintheroom…myandMerritt’smoans

alongwiththesoundofhisballsslappingmyass…pushesmecloseandasIfeelablastofwarmcum

fillme,ittipsmeover,andanotherorgasmtakesovermybody.Hegroans,digginghisfingersinto

mysides.

I don’t fight it or prepare for what is next. I give completely over to the orgasm, and as he

poundsme,hecomesagain,anditwon’tbelong,soonIwilltoo.Lookingintohiscleareyes,he’s

gotonehellofasmirkonhisface,andIsaytohim,“Whydidn’tyoudothatinSteamboat?”

“Becauseyousaidyoulikeditslow.”

He unties my hands, and I rub my wrists. “I thought I did. But had you done that, I might’ve

changemymindaboutendingthingsafteraweek.”

“Areyousayingyou’dstaywithmeformycock?”

“Maybe,”Ismirk,andhebeginstotickleme.

“You’resobad.DoesthatmeanIcanbookyourflight?”

Ithrashfromsidetoside,fightinghimtostop,buthedoesn’t.Thetruthis,Idon’twanthim

to…I never want him to stop. “Answer me,” he orders and the words roll off my tongue as if they

aren’tmyown,“Okay,I’llcome.”

Chapter26

Merritt

LyinginbednexttoQuinn,sheispeacefullyasleep.Itisbarelylightout,andIhopeIdon’twakeher,

butmyphonehasbeengoingoffnonstop.Mydadseemstobeonanewlevelofcraziness,nowthatI

decidedtostayinDenverforafewextradays.Hedoesn’tunderstandwhyandforsomereasonneeds

toknow.Hejustkeepssayingthatwehavesomuchworktodoandheneedsmebackattheoffice.

AsIrespondtohislasttext,Iwanttotellhimtogofuckhimself…butIdon’t.I’llbebacklater

ontonight;there’snothingthatcan’twaituntilthen.

He doesn’t respond and looking at Quinn, she is so beautiful. An email comes through from

Suzydistractingmefromwatchingher.ItcontainsQuinn’sflightinfoforFriday,andIcouldn’tbe

happierthatsheagreedtocomeandvisitme.Irespondtoherandsaythankyou,thenIforwarditto

Quinn.Ican’twaittohaveherinmybed.I’llmaketruetomypromiseandtieherthereallweekendif

shewants.

Just as the sun begins to pop up over the horizon, I set my phone down, wanting to make the

mostofmylastdaywithQuinn.Holdingherbodytightly,kissingthesoftskinofherneck,shewakes

slowlywithagrinonherface,andwhenshelooksatmelikethat,myheartmelts.

“Yousleepokay?”Iaskher.

“Yeah,thebest.”

“Good, baby,” I tell her and hold her body close to mine. She holds me back, her hands atop

mineaswewatchthesuncrestthemorningsky.

“Isthiswhatyougettowakeuptoeveryday?”

Rollingoverinmyarms,shesaystome,“Itis.”andshekissesme.Holdingontothebackof

herhead,Ikissherback.“Idon’twantyoutogo,”shetellsme.Hearinghersaythewords,letsme

knowthatweareheadeddowntherightpath,it’sjustgonnatakebabystepstogetthere.

“Idon’twanttoleave.”

“Skipworknextweekandstayherewithme.”

“Ha!IwishIcould,beautiful,butmydadisalreadythrowingatantrumwithmestayinghere

longer.”

“Screwyourdad.Hesoundslikearealasshole,youknowthat?”

“Oh,heis,buthe’stheonlyfatherIgot,andheholdsthekeytomyfuture.”

“Youshouldcallintowork,flyhomewithme,andletmetieyoutomybedallweek.I’dmake

youcomesomanytimes,you’dneverwanttoleave.”

“IfImissworkMonday,I’llgetfired.RememberthebribeItooksowecouldgototheNuggets

game?Istillhaveworktodo,andtheclientiscomingtomorrowmorning.”

“I guess neither of us can take the time off of work, so we’re just going to have to make the

mostoutoftheday.”

“Thatweare.Whatdoyouwanttodo?”

“Oh,that’suptoyou.Thisisyourcity.”

Sherollsmeontomybackandlaysherbodyalongmine.“Let’sstayinandfuck.”

“Okay,”Iagree,knowingthat’sallIreallywanttodoanyway.Wegetlostkissingoneanother,

thenaknockonherdoorstopsus.Shelooksatmewide-eyed,andIhavenocluewhattodo.

“Areyouexpectingsomeone?”Iaskher,andshescurriestogetdressed.

“No!”Sheshakesherheadandthenslamsthedoor,chargingoutoftheroom.Curioustosee

who’s here and a little worried it could be her crazy ex, I get dressed and then reach for the door

handle. A man’s voice stops me from proceeding, and I listen to his words. “You look fine, baby,

don’tbesilly.Doyouwantthisinhere?”

Rageconsumesme,andIyankopenthedoor,red-facedandonamissiontofuckupwhoeveris

callingher“baby.”

“You’re up,” she looks at me with a smile, and I ignore her, stalking towards the fridge. The

guyisbentoverlookinginsideofit,andbeforeIcangettohim,shejumpsinfrontofmeandsays,

“Merritt,thisismydad,Karl.Daddy,thisis,Merritt.”

Herdadturnsaround,clearlynotexpectinghertohavecompany,muchlessaman.He’sonthe

defensiverightawayasheglaresatme.Afterherlastbreakup,Iunderstand;hedoesn’twanttosee

herhurtagain.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir,” I say, changing my attitude, and extend my hand to him.

Reluctantlyheshakesit.

“Isthistheguyyoutoldyourmomabout?”heasksher.

“Yes,Daddy.Merrittisoneofthegoodones,though,sogoeasyonhim.”

“Ha!”helaughsfartooloudly,andI’malittleoffended.Hedoesn’tevenknowme.

“We’llseeaboutthat.Havedinnerwithustonight,wouldyou,son?”

“IwishIcould,sir,butI’mflyinghometoTexas.”

“Lunch,then?”

IglanceatQuinn,andshenods,soIagree.Herfathergivesherakissonthecheekandmea

sternlookasheleaveshercondo.“Wow!”Itakeaseatonthecouch,andshesitsnexttome.“AndI

thoughtmyoldmanwastough.”

“Stop it. He’s really very sweet; he’s just looking out for me. After my last breakup, I was a

mess,andheandmymomwerethereforme.”

“IguessifIhadadaughterandaguyfuckedwithher,I’dhateallmentoo.”

“See? So you get it. Now before we have to spend the day with my dad, will you fuck me

again?”

“You’reaneedylittlething,aren’tyou?”

Shenods, the cutestexpression across herface, and I lifther t-shirt overher head. “What are

yougonnadowithoutmethisweek?”

“Wecouldhavephonesex?”

Iliketheideaandthatshewantstotalktomeduringtheweek.ButIdon’tfocusonitforlongas

I have her with me, my hands on her body, her eyes locked on mine, and her control relinquished

over to me as I slide her panties down her sexy legs, loving her naked. And then I order her to do

whatIwant.

Chapter27

Quinn

“Wouldyoulikemoresalad,Merritt?”mymomasksasIwatchmydadstillglaringathim.

“No,thankyou,ma’am.”

“Whatisitthatyoudoagain,son?”

“I’mintheoilandgasindustry,sir.”

“Justlikethelastone,”hemuttersunderhisbreath.

“Excuseme?”Merrittsays.

“Dad, could I talk to you alone, please?” I finally ask him throwing my napkin down, so

aggravated with how he’s been treating Merritt. Heading down the hall, I storm into my parents’

office,andhefollows,closingthedoorbehindhim.“Whatisyourproblemwithhim?”

“Nothing,Idon’tevenknowhim.”

“Well, you’re sure acting like you do. You’d treat a homeless person on the street better than

you’retreatinghim.”

“Idon’tlikethewayhestaresatyou,Quinn.”

“Whatareyoutalkingabout,Dad?”

“Thelookinhiseyeisabitmuch.Youtwojustmet,right?Andit’sasifyou’reitforhim.”

“Then be happy for me, Dad, please? I’ve finally found a good guy. Don’t make this hard on

me.”

Mydadstepsclosertome,drawingmyeyestohisandsays,“Doyouhaveanyideahowhard

thatisforafathertodo?”

“Iunderstandthat,Dad.Justtry…forme…please.”

Hekissesmyforeheadandthenembracesmeinatighthug.AsIholdontohim,Ihopehecan

giveMerrittachance.Mydadcanbecoldandclosedoff,butheismyfatherafterall,andlikeMerritt

said,weonlygetone.

***

“Well,yourmomisgreat,butIofficiallythinkyourdadhatesme.”

“No,hedoesn’t.”IglanceathimasIdrivehimtotheairport,sosadthathistimeinDenverhas

alreadycometoanend.Ireallydon’twanthimtoleave.

“Whydidn’tyoutellmeyourexwasinoilandgas?”heasksme.

“Because it wasn’t my place to tell and he’s a client…so I have to protect his privacy at all

costs.”

“Evenagainstme?”

“Especially you, silly. If you find out who he is, I’m sure you’ll send a pipe bomb to his

doorstep.”

“Oohhh,that’sagoodidea.”

Glaringathim,heleansoverandkissesmycheek.

Herestshishandonmythigh,andIcanfeelmyselfalreadygettingemotionalaswenearthe

airport.“Canwenottalkabouthimanymore?”

“Ofcourse,babe.Ijustalwayswanttoprotectyou.”

“Iappreciatethat,Merritt,somuch.You’resogoodtome.”Lookingoverathim,Imisshim

already.“CanIwalkyouin?”Iaskhim.

“Ifyouwantto,sure.”

“Wecouldfindabathroomandhaveaquickie?”Iofferwithasmirkbutcanseeheisactually

considering it. Following the signs to the short-term parking, I take the first spot that I see. When I

turnthecaroff,thetearsprickthebackofmyeyes,andIfightthemtostop.Merrittisobliviousashe

kissesmyneck,suckingandnippingontheskinandgropingmybreasts.

Itryandfightbacktheemotions,butit’shard,andasobcreepsoutofme.

Alarmed,hepullsaway,lookingatmeandoncehecanseethatI’mvisiblyupset,heunlatches

myseatbeltandpullsmeoverandontohislap.Sittingcomfortablyinhishold,Istayinthismoment

foraslongasIcan.

“It’sonlyfourdays,andthenI’llseeyouFriday,”hetellsme,tryingtoreassureme.

“It’snotthat,”Isaytohim,chokingbackasob.

“Whatisitthen?”Hebrushesthehairoutofmyfacewaitingformetotellhim,andIhateto

admitwhatI’mfeeling,butheforcesmeto.“Tellme,please?”

“I’mjustscared.Thishasallbeensoperfect,andIworryitwon’tlast.”

“Whatdoyoumean?”

“Aguylikeyoucan’tpossiblybecontentlong-termwithagirllikeme.”

He’ssoconfused,lookingatmewithabewilderedexpressionacrosshisface.“Whywouldyou

thinkthat?”

Ishakemyhead,notwantingtoelaborateanyfurther.“Nevermind.”

“No,don’tbrushthisofflikethat,tellme.”

“It’smyowninsecuritiesgettingthebestofme,anditwasstupidofmetoletthemouttobegin

with.”

“Nothingyoueversayorfeelisstupid.Don’tyouunderstand?Talktome.”

Gazingintohissexyeyes,hecupsmycheekinthepalmofhishand,hisotherarmstillholding

me tightly. “You need to understand how perfect you are in my eyes. I’ll never hurt you; that’s a

promiseyouhavetoremember,okay?”

Listeningtohiswords,theyresonatedeepinsideofme.I’mnotsurewhyIbelievehim,butIdo.

“Thankyou.”

“Forwhat?”

“Forunderstandingmeandreassuringme.”

“Ofcourse.IwishIdidn’thavetogo.”

“It’sonlyforafewdays,”Isay,tryingtobelievethewordsmyself.AndI’mstunnedtorealize

how quickly I’ve gone from not wanting to see him, to dreading him leaving. Now to just make it

throughtheweek.

Chapter28

Merritt

“GoodjobgettingtheSerranosback,”mydadsays,poppinghisheadintomyoffice.He’sintownfor

afewdays,andIgotorespond,butbeforeIcan…he’sgone.Obviouslyinabighurry.

Checkingtheclock,Ihavetenminutesbeforemynextmeeting,andIhaven’ttalkedtoQuinnall

day.Wemissedeachotherthismorning,andIcan’tstopthinkingabouther.Grabbingmycellphone,

I get up and close my office door as I dial her number. Looking out at the water while the phone

rings,Iwishshewerelookingatitwithme.

“Hey,thisisQuinn,leavemeamessage.”

“HaveIevertoldyouthatyouhavethesexiestvoiceI’veeverheard?”Ismilethinkingaboutit.

“Anyways,Imighthavetokeepcallingyourvoicemailandjerkoff.Imissyou.Callmeback,sexy.”

Hangingup.Ilookdownatmyhardshaft.

Seriously?

Nowisnotthetime!“Mr.Smith,”Suzychimesinthroughmyphone.“Yourfouro’clockisin

theconferenceroom.”

Closingmyeyes,Igrabmysuitcoatandslideiton,butassoonasIdomyphonerings.Across

thescreenisQuinn’snameandIanswerit,notcaringthatIhaveclientswaitingforme.

“Hi,babe!”

“Hey.”She’squiet,andIworrysomethingiswrong.

“Everythinggood?”

“Yeah,I’mjustinthebathroomatwork.”

“Areyounow?”Mycockstiffensallthewayimaginingheraloneinabathroomstall.“What

areyouwearing?”

“Atightbluedress.”

“Sendmeapicture,”Iaskherandbegintorubmydickthroughmypants.

Onecomesthrough;damn,sheisabsolutelybreathtaking.“God,IwishIwastheretofuckyou.”

“Metoo.”

“Touchyourself,”Itellherandamrewardedwithhersweetsoftmoans.

“Mr.Smith,I’msorrytobotheryouagain,butyourfatherisrequestingyoubeginthemeeting,”

Suzychimesinthroughthephonesystem.

“It’snotevenfouryet,”IbarkatSuzy.

“I’msorry,sir.”

“TellhimI’llbethereatfour.”Glancingatmycomputer,it’s3:58.QuinnandIwon’thavetime

tomessaroundnow.

“Youhavetogo?”sheasksme.

“I do, I have a meeting. But I’m going to have my assistant give you access to my calendar.

She’llsendyouthelinkandtellyouhowtolookatthescheduleandseewhereIam,thiswaymaybe

wewon’tmisseachothersomuch,okay?”

“Okay,”sheagrees,andIaskher,“Whattimewillyoubehometonight?”

“Aroundsix.”

“Okay,I’llcallyouthen;makesureyou’renaked.”

ShegigglesandIhatetoendourcall,butIhaveto.“Maybejustonemorepicture?”Iaskher,

andshesaystome,“Bye,Merritt.”AndhangsupasIwatchthescreenturnblack.ThenIheadintothe

conferenceroom,thankfulthatmycockisn’thardanymore.Walkingin,myfatherhasalreadybegun

themeeting.

Fuckingprick!

Likehereallycaresaboutpunctuality.Hedoesn’tmakeittohalfofthemeetingshe’sscheduled

to attend. Shaking the clients’ hands, I sit down, and my dad just keeps yapping away, reading off

whateveragendawasemailedtohim.Idoubtheevenknowsmuchaboutthedeal.

MyphonebuzzesandIcan’tstopmyselffrompullingitout.Onthescreenisanotherpictureof

Quinn.Inthisoneshe’sblowingmeakiss,herhugetitsarestrainingthetightconfinesofherdress,

andI’mtemptedtoflytheretonight,surpriseher,andfuckherallnight.Thenleaveonthefirstflight

outofDenverintimetoreturnhereforanotherdayatthegoodol’job.

“Ifthere’ssomethingmorepressing,youneedtoattendto,Merritt,byallmeans,pleasedoso.”

Peevedatmyfatherforcallingmeoutinfrontofpotentialclients,Isay,“Thanks,we’vegota

hiccupwiththeSerranodeal.IthinkI’llhavetoflyintoDenvertohandleit.”

Apologizing to the clients, I leave and tell Suzy to book me the first flight out of here into

Denver. “Right away, sir.” She’s quick to respond, and I head into my office, making sure I’ve got

everythingcoveredfortherestoftheday.Sittingatmydesk,anotherpicturecomesthrough.Christ,

thiswomaniskillingme.

Textingherback,Itellher,Youbetterstopwiththesepictures,orI’mgonnabookaflightout

thereandtakeyouhostage.

Anotherpicturecomesthrough,thisoneisofhercleavage,andSuzychimesin.“Mr.Smith?”

“Yes,ma’am.”

“I can get you out on a red-eye tonight leaving here at 12:37am, when would you like to

return?”

“Isthatthesoonestthatyoucanfindforthedeparture?”

“Itis.WithThanksgivingcomingup,itseemslikeeveryoneisalreadymakingtravelplans.”

“Shit,”Imutterundermybreathandmydadbargesinmyoffice.“Letmegetbacktoyou,”Itell

her.

“HowcomeIwasnotawarethattherewasaproblemwiththeSerranodeal?”

“Itjustcameup,rightbeforethemeeting.That’swhyIwaslate.”EventhoughIwasn’tactually

lateandthereisnoproblemwiththeSerranodeal.Givinghimareasonfornotbeingtherewhenhe

wantedmewillmakehimhappy.

“Canyoufixit?”

“OfcourseIcan.”

“Good.”

Hewalksoff;myphonefloodedwithatonofpicturesfromQuinn,andSuzyislookingatme

fromherdeskacrossthebuildingwantingtoknowifIwanttheflightbookedornot.Fuck,thisisall

somuchtohandle.I’mnotsurewhattodo.ShouldIgotoDenver,whenIwon’tevengettoherhouse

untilatleastthreeinthemorning?OrshouldIwaitforhertocomeherethisweekend?

Chapter29

Quinn

It’s6:15pmandmyphoneringsagain.IhurrytofinishupsoIcanleaveandtalktoMerritt.Idon’t

dare answer it now; ‘cause he’ll distract me and make me blush a shade of red I really don’t want

anyoneheretosee.

“Night,Quinn,”mybosssayswalkingout.

“Night,”Itellhimandpackupmybag.Merrittcallsmeagain,andIfinallyanswerit,walking

out.

“It’s6:16,mydickisnothappywithyourightnow.”Igiggleandtellhim,“Hellotoyoutoo.”

“Don’tbeallniceandproper,thisisn’taboutafriendlyexchangeofwords;thisisaboutsex,

baby.”

Theelevatordingsasitarrivesonmyfloorandhesaystomeinanaggravatedtone,“Areyou

stillatwork?”

“Maybe.” I push the lobby button and begin my ride down. He goes quiet and then my phone

buzzeswithatext.Ilookatthescreenandseehesentmeapicture.

OpeningitupasIwalkoutintothebitter,coldnight,Igaspatthesightofhisrockharddick,

beingclenchedinthepalmofhishand.

“Merritt?”Iscoldhim.

“What?Wehadadate,andyou’relate.Soyoubetterwalkhomesuperfuckingfast.”

“Iam.”

“Butbesafe,beautiful.”

Ismilelovinghowhe’salwayslookingoutforme.“Imissyou,”Itellhim.

“Metoo.Howwasyourday?”

“Busy,butitflewbyandkeptmymindoffyou.”

“IwishIcouldsaythesame.Icouldn’tshakeyoufrommythoughtsandthenthosepictures.”

“Sorry,Igotalittlecarriedaway.”

“No,don’tapologize.Ilovethem.You’resogorgeous,youknowthat?”

Walkingintomybuilding,Ihavethebiggestgrinonmyface.Healwayssaystherightthings.

“Thankyouforsayingthat.”

“It’sthetruth.”

“God,IwishIwastheretofuckyou.”

“Iwishthattoo.”Openingthedoortomycondo,Ican’thelpbutfeellikemaybehe’slyingand

he’shere.HedidsaythatifIdidn’tstopwiththepictureshewasgonnaflyouthere,soitmighthave

spurredmetosnapatonofthemandfloodhisphonealldaywiththem.

Butlookingaround,myplaceisdarkandquiet.Closingthedoor,Ipressmybacktoit,tears

suddenlyprickingthebacksofmyeyes.“Youhomeyet?”

“Yeah,Ijustwalkedin.”

“Good!Getnakedandtextmeapic.”

Letting my coat and bag fall to the floor, I step out of my shoes and don’t know why I’m

suddenlysodamnemotional.

“Jesus,I’mhardforyou.”KeepingmyemotionsincheckbecauseIdon’twanthimtothinkI’m

crazy,Istripnaked.“Whereareyou?”heasksme.

“Inthelivingroom.You?”

“I’minmybed,imaginingyoursoftlipsaroundtheheadofmycock.”

Closing my eyes, I imagine that I’m there too. I can feel him inside my mouth; his hardness

makes me so wet. Dragging my hand down my body, I spread open my pussy lips and gently rub

smallcirclesovermyclit.

“God,youtastegood,”Itellhim.

“Youlikemestuffingyourmouthfull?”

“Uhhuh.”

“Areyoutouchingyourself?”

“Iam.”

“Sendmeapicture.”

Isnaponeofmybodyandsendittohim.Hegroanswhenitcomesthrough.“Fingeryourself

andimagineI’minsideyou.”

“Keeptalking.”

“I’mgoingtofuckyou,okay?”

“Yes,”Ipant.

“CanyoufeeltheheadofmydickasIrubitalloveryoursloppypussy?”

“Uhhuh.”

“Doyouwantmeinsideyou?”

“Please,Iwantyouinsidemenow.”

“I’mgonnagoslowsoyoucanfeeleveryinchofme,okay?”

AndwiththosewordsIsinktwofingersinsideofmyself,moaningfromthefullness.“That’sit,

takeallofmelikeagoodgirl.”

“Fuck,”Icryout,fingeringmyselfinawayIneverhavebefore.

“You’redirty,aren’tyou?”heasksme.

“Iam.”

“Youlikebeingfucked?”

“Uhhuh.”

“Good,nowslipyourpinkyintoyourass.I’mgonnafuckithardthisweekend.”

Istopforamoment,neverhavinghadanalsexbefore,butMerritthasmesohornyrightnow

thatIlistentohimandasIusemypinky,asensationreverberatesfromdeepwithinmybody.“Oh,

God,”Icryout,strokingmyselfandhesaystome,“Areyouclose?”

“Yes.”

“Good,nowgofasterandcomehard.”

My body is smashed down into my couch; my legs spread wide, and my fingers have me so

closetolettinggo,butIfightit,thesensationofteeteringontheedgeissogood.

Then he grunts fiercely, obviously coming and that’s my undoing. I shake from head to toe,

screamingformercy,forhimtostop,togivemeabreak.“Yes,baby,letgo,”heordersme,andonce

mybodysettles,Irealizeitwasmeallalong.Hissmoothvoicecoaxedmeon,butIwasincontrol

andcould’vestopped.Removingmyfingersfrominsidemyself,Iscootupandpullablanketfrom

overthebackofthecouchandcoverupmynakedbody.

“God,thatwasgood.You’resosexy.”

“Itwas.Thankyou.”

“Ofcourse.Soyougonnaletmefuckyourassthisweekend?”

“Maybe.Willithurt?”

“Well,that’suptoyou.Ifyoutryhardenough,youcanalwaysfindpleasureinthepain.”

“Woulditmakeyouhappy?”

“Itwould.Iwanttohaveyouineverywayimaginable.”

Hisstatementechoesdeepwithinme.Ilovetherawhonestythathealwaysshareswithme.He’s

nevertriedtohideit,andIadmirethat.

Chapter30

Merritt

AstheplanemakesitdescentintoDenver,I’manxioustogettoQuinn.It’sdarkashellout,andIcan’t

waittosurpriseher,tosneakintoherapartmentandslideintoherbed.Ijustwanttofuckherallnight

long.

“Flightattendants,pleaseprepareforlanding,”thepilotsaysovertheintercom,andIclosemy

eyes,lovinghowI’malwaysrewardedwiththememoriesofher.

As the plane gets lower and lower to the ground, the pressure changes and I have to keep

poppingmyears.Butsomethinggoeswrong;thepressuredropscompletely,andtheoxygenbagsfall

fromtheceiling.Thepassengersallbegintopanic,screamingandtremblingtogettheirmaskson.

I gasp for air reaching for mine, but it’s too far away. Everything around me silences and I

closemyeyesfallingfromthesky…

…Sittingupinmybed,I’moutofbreath.Fuck,itwasjustadream.Itwasonlyadream.

It’s12:37,thetimemyflightwouldhavedepartedforDenver,andIcan’tdenythatI’malittle

pissedatmyselffornotgoing.EverynightI’vewokenupatthissametimemissingQuinn.Mybrain

sendingmyselfasubliminal“fuckyou.”

Sittingup,Irubmyfaceandlookoutatthewater;it’ssmoothasglass.ThankGodit’sFriday.I

don’tthinkIcantakeanothernightofsleeplikethis.Quinnwillbeherebytheendoftheday.

Grabbingmyphone,I’mtemptedtotexther,butdon’twanttowakeher.

Lyingbackdown,Iclosemyeyes,hopingIcanfallasleep…butIcan’t.

SoIdecidetogointotheofficeandgetajumponmyday.ThesoonerI’mdone,thesooner

she’llbehere.

After showering and dressing, I make the short commute into the office. It’s pitch dark out. I

parkandheadin,thealarmthattypicallysoundswhenIenterthroughthefrontdoorisoff.

That’sstrange.

Flippingonafewlights,Ilookaroundbutdon’tspotanyone.ThenIhearawoman’svoiceand

spotmyfather ’slighton.Shit,ishestillhere?Hewassupposedtoflyhome,orsoIthought.

Walking down the hall, I keep my feet light and stop, listening to them for a moment. They

aren’ttalking,andIhavetolook.Trustme;Idon’twantto,butIhavetoknowwhat’sgoingonand

whohe’swith.

Idon’tthinkhe’sdatedanyonesincemymom.Glancingin,he’sonthesofainhisoffice,the

womanisstraddlinghislapastheyaremakingout.

Jesus,thisisgross.

Itryandfigureoutwhosheis,andthenInoticehersweaternexttothemandrememberitfrom

ameetingtoday.It’soneofourinterns.Ah,fuck!

QuietlyIbackupbeforeeitherofthemspotsmeandheadoutofthebuilding.Bileisintheback

ofmythroat,seeingsomeonesoyoungwithmyfather.She’shalfhisage!Whatisshethinkingand

howdidInothaveanyideathiswasgoingon?

Gettinginmycar,IcallQuinn.Sheanswershalfasleep,“Iseverythingokay?”

“Shit,I’msorry.Iforgotthetime.Callmeinthemorning,whenyou’reup.”

“No,Iwanttohearyourvoice.Whatareyoudoingawake?”

“Youdon’twanttoknow.”

Shepausesandthensays,“ShouldIbeworried?”

Ichuckleandlookoutmywindshield.“No,nothingtoworryabout,beautiful.”

“Comeon;youcan’twakemeupinthemiddleofthenightandnottellme.”

Startingmycar,Idrivebackhome.“Icouldn’tsleep,soIwentintoworkand…Icaughtmydad

with…”Itrailoff,notevenabletospeakthewords.

“With?”sheprobesfurther.

“With one of our interns. She’s like half his age. I’m still trying to process it all. For fuck’s

sake…howdidInotknow?”

“Becausetheydidn’twantyouto.”

“Buthe’soldenoughtobeherfather;that’sjustgross.”

“Rememberwhatyoutoldmewhenwemet?”

“No.”

“Yousaid,‘Everyonefucks.’”

“Okay,that’senough.Thisismydadwe’retalkingabout.ThankGodIdidn’twalkinonthat.”

Shelaughsatmeandasksme,“Whyareyouatworkinthemiddleofthenightanyway?”

“Icouldn’tsleep.Iwastryingtogetaheadstartsinceyou’recomingtonight.”

“Mmmmhhh,Ican’twait,”shetellsme.“ButIthinkImightbegettingsick.”

“What?No,don’tsaythat.”

“Trustme;IwishIwasn’t…butIdon’tfeelwellatall.”

“Callintoworkandhopanearlierflight.I’llworkfromhometodayandtakecareofyou.”

“Thatsoundsreallynice.”

“Thendoit.”

“CanIaskyousomething,Merritt?”

“Ofcourse.”Pullingbackuptomyhouse,Iheadaroundbackandsitonthedeck,enjoyingthe

view.

“Howarewegoingtomakethisworklong-term?Itseemswecan’tbeartobeapartandwe’re

noteventogether.That’snotgoingtogetanyeasier.”

I think about her question, and I’m not sure how to answer her. I don’t know how we got

wrappedupthewaywedid…buthereweare.Idon’tusuallythinkthatfarahead…I’malive-in-the-

momentkindaguy.ButwithQuinn,IfeellikeIhavetothinkfurtherandprepareformorethanjust

lookingforwardtowhattheweekendholds.

Chapter31

Quinn

Lookingthroughthecrowdsofpeopleattheairport,Ican’tspotMerritt.Hesaidhe’dmeetmeright

whenIgotthroughsecurity,butIdon’tseehim.Ihopehedidn’tgetcaughtupatwork.Pullingoutmy

phonetocallhim,I’mstartledashegrabsmefrombehind.“Gotcha!”

“Hiiii!”Iclingtohim,breathinghimin,holdingontohisarms.

“Howareyoufeeling?”henuzzlesmyneck,andIturnaround.

“Better,”Itellhim,andhekissesmehard.Webothgetlostinthemoment,forgettingthatweare

standinginthemiddleoftheairport.Hiscockisgrowing,andI’mawareneitherofushasthebest

self-controlwhenitcomestokeepingourselvesappropriateinpublic.

Slowingthekiss,herestshisforeheadagainstmineandsays,“I’msohappyyou’rehere.”

“Metoo,thankyouforhavingme.Youlookreallyfuckinghot.”

“Youlikemeinasuit,don’tya?”

I nod, and he takes my bag from my shoulder and wraps his hand around mine. He keeps

lookingdownatmelikehecan’tgetenoughandmyheartflutters.

“IfIdon’tletyougobackhome,isthataproblem?”Irollmyeyesathim,andhesays,“What?

I’mjustbeinghonest.”

Weexittheairport,andthewarmairisarefreshingfeeling.“OhmyGod,itfeelsamazing.”

“Ohyeah,Iforgotyou’vebeenusedtothosesub-zerotemperatures.”

ItfeelssogoodthatItakemycoatoff.Walkinguptohiscarheunlocksthedoorsandopens

mine.Sittingonthepassengerseatisahugebouquetofflowers.“Why,thankyou,”ItellhimasIget

comfyinhissleekMercedes,smellingthegorgeousflowers.

“My pleasure.” He tosses my bag in the trunk and then opens his door, unbuttoning his coat

beforehegetsin.“Iwasgonnabringthemin,butIwantedtohavemyhandsfree.”

“Sowhat’stheplan?”Iaskandhebacksoutoftheparkingplace.

“Sex,food,sex,food,sex,food.Thatworkwithyou?”

“Of course, but I’m hungry now.” Reaching over, I rub my hand over his shaft; his dick is

alreadyhard,andhesays,“Byallmeans,eataway,baby.”

***

“Yousaidyoudidn’tcook.”IglareatMerrittashepullssomefoodoutofthefridge.

“No,Itoldyou,Iorderinmoreoftenthannot.ButIlovetocookwhenIhavesomeonetocook

for.”

Ismile,sippingonaglassofwineashepreparesourdinner.“Sonomeatatallforyou?”

“Nope.”

“Haveyoualwaysbeenavegetarian?”

“Ihave.Myparentsare,it’showIwasraised.”

“Haveyouevertriedmeat?”

“Yeah,andIreallydon’tlikehowittastes.”

“Exceptformine?”Hecockshiseyebrowsatmeandgrabshisdickthroughhispants.

“Yes, except for yours.” I kiss his neck and refill my glass, looking around his house. “Have

youlivedhereforlong?”

“Afewyears.”

“Alwaysalone?”

“Yes,”heanswers,andIhatetohaveasked,butIcan’timaginehimbeingallaloneinthishuge

glasshouseonthewater.I’dfiguredheshareditwithanexorsomething.

Gettinglostintheview,hewipeshishandsdryandasksme,“Whatareyouthinking?”

“Nothing.It’sgorgeoushere.”

“Itis.Theviewisevenbetterwithyouinit.”

Ismirkovermyshoulderathim,andhesays,“Justspeakingthetruth.Dinnershouldbedonein

abit.Doyouwanttogositoutback?”

“Sure.”Hetakesmyhandandguidesmeontothedeck.Theairisstillsurprisinglywarm,andI

loveit.Ican’tseemtogetenough.Wesittogetherontheoutdoorsofa,andIaskhim,“Didyouever

confronttheintern?”

“Hellno!”

Ilaughandalmostspitmysipofwineout.“Whynot?Ithoughtyouweregoingto.”

“I was, but then her boyfriend came and picked her up for lunch, and I don’t know. Maybe it

wasn’therinthere.Ididn’tseeherface.”

“We could spy on them?” I joke, and he laughs. “No way, I don’t think we’ll leave at all this

weekend,plus,he’sbackhomeinCalifornia.”

“Whydoeshelivethere?”

“It’swhereourmainhubis.He’salwaystravelingsohe’sallover.”

“Whydoyoureallyputupwithhim?Eventhoughhe’sgoingtoonedaygiveyouthecompany,

isitreallyworthit?”

He finishes his wine and says to me, “What other choice do I have? I’m too old to play

basketball,andifItriedtogoanywhereelselikeAridid,he’dmakemylifehell.SoIplayalongand

dowhatIcantoproveI’mreadytotakeonthecompany.”

“Youreallywantitthatbad,huh?”

“Ido,morethananything…exceptyou.”Hiswordsbringapartofmetolife.Iknowhowmuch

runningthecompanymeanstohim,soforhimtowantmemorethanthatissomethingspecial.

“Yeah?”Iask.

“Yup,andIthinkbecauseIturneddownmydreamsofbasketball,Ihavetomakethiswork.I

can’tfail.”

Iseehispoint—he’sfollowingadreamthatonedaywillpayoffbecauseheletgoofhisreal

passion when he didn’t pursue basketball. But I also hate to see the shit he has to go through to get

there. It’s like when his dad says “jump,” Merritt will bitch, but then he’ll say, “how high?” and do

whateverhisdadwantsandthatisnotthemanthatMerrittis.

Chapter32

Merritt

Draggingmytongueoverhersensitiveskin,shewrithesbeneathme,tryingtoseearoundtheroom,

buttheblindfoldkeepseverythingdark.

“Ididn’tsayyoucouldmove.”Myvoiceislacedwithpassion.Ihaveeachofherhandsbound

toheranklesspreadingherwideandhelplessonmybed.

Iloveplayingwithherandcontrollingher.IalsolovehowwillingandacceptingQuinnis,too.

Shedoesn’tjudgemeandisnotscared,whichIneedinlife.

Inmostofmyrelationships,themomentI’vetriedtoshowthisside,womenfreak;theyarenot

acceptingintheslightest.ButnotQuinn.FromthemomentIblindfoldedherortiedhertothebed,she

waswillingandcompliant,andnowheresheisagain,powerless,lettingmehaveallofthecontrol.

Flickingmytongueoverherclit,Iteaseheragain,andthistime,Itellher,stoppingforabrief

moment.“Youcancomenow.”

It’snotbutanotherfewseconds,andshe’sscreamingmyname,cominghard.

Her pussy now so wet that I can’t wait to fuck her. Pulling away, I take the blindfold off, her

sexyeyesfindmine,andIgripeachofherasscheeksasInudgemyselfinsideher.

“Fuck,you’retight,”Imurmur,herpussysoconstrictingthatitlightsmyinsidesup.

Lookingdownatmydick,theveinsarebulgingasImoveinandoutofher.God,thisisintense.

Maybeit’sthisangle.Iwatchourbodiesandthepointwheretheyconnect,herpussylipsspreadwide,

eatingmeup.I’dplannedonfuckingherasstonight,andIstillcould‘causeshehasmyshaftsowet

thatI’dhavenoproblemgoingin,butthisistoogood.Takingmythumb,Istickitinhermouth.She

sucks and bites it, crying out in pleasure as she takes all of me. And then I pull it away, rubbing

aroundtherimofherass,“Yes,”shebegsme,andIfingerherwhileIblastaheavyloaddeepinside

hertightslit.

Shecomesagain,herentirebodyfightingtherestraints,andIlovetoseehersohotandhorny,

givingovertothepleasureofwhatwearetogether.Ourconnectionisexplosive,andIhopethisis

justthebeginningofmoretimeslikethis.

Pullingmycockfromher,sheisexhausted,butIcouldgoagain.Iremovethestrapsfromher

wristsandcantellshe’sgonnabruise.“Youcan’tfightthathard,baby,”Itellherandkissthetender

skinonherarm.

“Itfeelssogood,though;itmakeseverythingsomuchmoreintense.”

“Youlikeitthen,beingtiedupandhelpless?”

“Yes,morethanIcould’veeverimagined.”

“Haveyoueverdoneanythinglikethiswithaguybefore?”

“Hell,no.I’dbescaredandrunningforthehills.”

“Youdidn’truntonight.”

“‘Causethere’snothingyoucoulddothatcouldmakemerun.”

“ThankGod,‘causeIwould’vechasedyounaked.”

She rolls over in my arms, looking me in the eye and says, “Who knew when we met and I

thoughtallmenweredicks,thatthisiswherewe’dbe?”

“You didn’t ever think I was a dick, though. You just wanted mine and didn’t know how to

handleit.MissUnplugged-From-The-World,guardingyourheartandall.”

“Hey,” her eyebrows scrunch as she pouts a little, “I was hurt, and you…you know if I think

aboutit,youtookadvantageofme.Youknewitandstillpursuedme.Ihaven’tquitegivenintoyou,

Merritt.”

“Yes,youhave,andyouknowit.Underneathitall,Icouldsmellthefreakinsideofyouwanting

out.”

Welaughatourlittlebanter,andIholdhertightlyagainstmychest.Herfacesquishedagainst

me,andIclosemyeyes,owningthismoment,thissolitudebecauseinjustacoupleofquickdays…

she’llbegone,andwe’llbothbemiserablebeingawayfromeachother…again.

Chapter33

Quinn

WakingupinMerritt’sbed,he’slyingnexttome,watchingmesleepandhasthesexiestgrinonhis

face.“Morning,”hesaysthroughasmileandkissesme.

“Morning.Whattimeisit?”

Hegrabshisphoneandsays,“Ninethirty.”

“Youbeenuplong?”

“Yeah,foralittlewhile.Ihandledsomefiresatworkandthoughtwecouldgetout.”

“Whatdidyouhaveinmind?”

“Youeverbeenhorsebackriding?”

“No,why?”

“Wannagiveitatrytoday?”

“Merritt,areyouacowboydeepdown?”Iteasehim.“Hiddenbeneathallthosesexylayersis

thereamanthatcravestheopenrange?”

“No, ma’am,” he shakes his head and hops out of bed, completely naked. His ass cheeks flex

witheverystep.

“I’mcallingyourbluff!”Ihollerout,andhewalksoutofhisclosetonlywearingacowboyhat

ashestrutstotheshower.

“Iknewit!”

Hesmirksoverhisshoulderatme,gettingintheshower,andIstepoverhishatthathetossed

onthefloortofollowhim.

Afteraverythoroughwashingandfucking,IthinkImighthavetoskiphorsebackriding.My

pussyissorefromsomuchsex.He’sananimal;therereallyarenolimits.

Onthedrive,Iaskhim,“So,arethesehorsesyours?”

“Kinda.Theyweremymom’s.Theywereherprideandjoybeforeshepassed.”

“I’msorry,Merritt,Ihadnoideashewasgone.”

“It’sokay;shepassedwhenIwasateenager.Sometimes,IfeellikeIknowthehorsesbetterthan

Iknewher.”

“Howdidshepass?”Ihatetoaskbuthavetoknow.

“Cancer, it came fast and took her quickly. That’s when my dad changed. Without her, he

becameaprick.Socoldandclosedofftotherestoftheworld.Ithoughtitwashiswayofgrieving

andthatastimewentonitwouldgetbetter,butitdidn’t.”

“Isthatalsowhyyoudidn’tpursueyourbasketballdreams?”

“Itis;Iwashopingifweworkedtogetherthatthingswouldgetbacktohowtheyusedtobe…

butthatneverhappened.Wegrewfurtherapartandhonestlyseeinghimwithourinterntheothernight

disgustedme.Mymomwould’vebeenappalledhadshecaughthimwithsomeonesoyoung.”

“Well,I’msureshe’dbeproudofthemanthatyou’vebecome.”

“Ihopeso,Quinn.”

Hepullsdownadirtroad.Thedustmorphsaroundus,andIcanfeelthesunheatingmethrough

thewindshield.Wehavetheaironlow,andinColorado,youwouldn’timaginerunningyourACthis

timeofyear.

Up ahead is a large barn surrounded by acres and acres of open land. There are quite a few

horsesallover,andasheparkshiscarinfrontofabarn,hesaystome,“Theretheyare.”

Lookinginside,Iseetwowhitehorsespeeringoutatus.“Thewhiteones?”Iaskandpoint.

“Yes,ma’am.”Hehopsoutofthecarandplaceshishatonhishead.IlaughathispoliteTexas

boy“ma’am”andfollowbehindhim,lovingthewayhisasslooksinhisjeans.

“Merritt!”anoldermanexclaims,ridinguponahorsehimself.

“John,howareyou,sir?”heasks,andtheyshakehands.

“Verywell,son.”

“Good. This is Quinn, my…” he trails off, introducing me and I jump in, the words spilling

from my lips. “Girlfriend, I’m his girlfriend. It’s nice to meet you, John.” The man tips his hat,

leaningdowntokissmyknucklesasIextendmyhanduptohim.

“Likewise.”Hislipsaredry,butIcanseethereisnoharmintheinteraction.

Merritt’seyesarealloverme,andI’msureit’sbecauseofwhatIjustsaid.Wehaven’treally

spokenmuchmoreaboutwhatthefuturelookslike,butwhenIthinkaboutit,IwanttobehisandI

wanthimtobemine.“Thegirlsareallsuitedupandreadyforya,”Johnsays.

“Great,thankyou.”

Thenheturnsonhishorse,andMerrittandIwalkintothebarn.

“Girlfriend?”heasksme.

“Yeah,isthataproblem?”

“No,”heblurtsout,“Noproblematall.”

Thehorsesaresocurioustoseeus,liketwochildrenmeetingnewfriends.

“ThisisBell,andthisisTink.”

“LiketheDisneycharacters?”

“Yup,mymomwasahugefan.”

Merrittopensthehalfdoortotheirstall,andIfollowhimin.Hepetsbothoftheirnoses,and

youcanseerightawaytheyknowhimverywell,andIstandnotsurewhattodo.Hetakesmyhand

andplacesitonBell’snose,hereyeslookdeepintomine,sotrustingandloving.GentlyIbegintopet

herthewayheis.

“Here,touchTink,too.We’vegottaseewhichoneyouconnectwith.”

AsIstandwithbothofmyhandsplantedfirmlyonthehorses’noses,Irubbetweentheireyes

andMerrittmovesbehindme,holdingmybodyclosetohis.

“Whatdoyouthink,girls?”heaskstalkingtothehorses.“Really,yousure?”

“Whatdidtheysay?”Iask,actingconcernedasIplayalongwithhim.

“Theybothagreed…thatyou’regonnaneedtorideme.”

Chapter34

Merritt

“IsthereanythingIcoulddotoconvinceyoutostay?”IaskQuinn.

“You’d have to take me hostage at this point. I have a big client at work next week that I’m

takingtheleadon.”

“Thatshouldn’tbeaproblem.Yourparentswon’tcomelookingforyouforatleastaweek.”

“Stopit.Rememberwhatyousaidlasttime—it’sonlyfourdays.”

Holdingontothesidesofhergorgeousface,Ihearherwords,butmakingmyselfbelievethem

isawholeotherstory.I’vegrowntodependonourtimetogether.Everyinteractionissoamazing.

“After what you said at the barn, I want you to know now you’re mine, no more bullshit, no

morewaveringbackandforthscaredyou’regonnaenduphurt.IfIwanttoflytoDenvertofuckyou

andleave,thenIwill,orifIwantyouatmyhousefortheweekend,it’sgottahappen.Ineedtoknow

you’reallrightwiththat,okay?

Shenodsandgivesmeahugesmile.“Tellme,”Iorderher.

“Okay.”

Pullingmeclosertoher,shekissesmyneck,huggingmehard.Thentheymakealastboarding

callforherflight,andIhatethatshehastogo.Yes,it’salittleoverboard,butIboughtatickettoo,so

Icouldbewithherforaslongaspossible.Idon’tknowwhatitisabouther,butthewomanisdriving

mecrazy.

“Ishouldgo.”

“Thankyouforeverything,Quinn.”Ikissheragain,herindulgentlipssosmoothagainstmine.

“Callmeassoonasyouland?”

She stands and I pull her down to me, kissing her once more, then I watch her walk to the

attendant,herassstaringbackatme,remindingmeofhowamazingitwastofuck.Andthen…she’s

gone.

Standingup,IlookoutthewindowatherplaneandknowIneedtogo,orhell,Imightjustget

onit.Walkingtowardstheexit,Ispotabaranddecidetostopandhaveadrink.

“I’llhaveawhiskeyontherocks,please.”

Thebartenderpoursmydrinkandasksme,“Youcomingorgoing?”

“Huh?”Irespond,inadaze,alreadymissingQuinn.

“Youflyinginoroutofhere?”

“Oh,Ilivehere,justdroppedmygirlfriendoff.”

Henodsandhelpsanothercustomer.Drowningmysorrowsinthealcohol,Ipulloutmyphone

asitvibrates.Gonnapowerdown,thankyouforeverythingthisweekend,babe.

Fly safe, baby. I hit send and set my empty glass down; the bartender refills it, and I exhale

heavily.She’smine,andit’sonlyfourdays…Icandothis.

Chapter35

Quinn

HuggingKamiasImeetherforacupofcoffee,shelookssocutealldressedupforherinterview.

“Areyounervous?”Iaskher.

“Yeah,alittle…Iguess.”

“Don’tbe,youknowyougotthis.”

“Ihopeso.”

“SohowarethingswithJacob?”

Shesmiles,sippingonhercoffeeandsays,“Reallygood.We’retryingtohaveababy.”

“Shutup.Howexciting!Whendidyoudecidethis?”

“InSteamboat.Iforgotmypillswhenwewentupthere,andwetalkedaboutthings,andwe’re

bothready.”

Leaningover,Igivemyfriendabighug,sohappyforher.“Soyou’reliketrying-trying?”

“Uhhuh.”

“Wow,thatissoawesome.You’vegottakeepmeupdated,girl.”

“Iwill;so…howarethingswithMerritt?”

“Good.” I sound like a schoolgirl—my voice changes a pitch as butterflies take over my

stomach.“It’sjustsohardtobeawayfromhimeveryweek.”

“Butyouseehimontheweekends,right?”

“Ido,andeventhoughit’sallsonew,there’ssomethingabouthim,andus…therelationshipis

likenothingI’veeverhad.Forthefirsttimeinmylife,itfeelsreal—genuine.”

“OhQuinn,I’msohappyforyou,andwhatagreatsnag,he’ssuperhot.”

“Youhavenoidea.Iwasathishousethisweekend—”

“HelivesinTexas,right?”

“Yeah.Andhehasthiscowboyhat,whichistotallynotmything,butwhenhecallsme‘ma’am’

andwearsit,IswearIloseallcontrol.Weevendidanal,”Iwhisperandlookaroundmakingsureno

oneheardme.

“Really?Howwasit?”

“Sogood.Iwasscareditwasgonnahurt,butitwasthetotalopposite.”

“Damn,girl.I’mgettinghotjustthinkingaboutit.”

Welaughlikeacoupleofgigglyteenagersandthenshechecksthetime,“OhGod,I’vegotta

go.”

“Goodluck,sweetie.”IhughertightlyasshewalkstotheelevatorbanksandIheadbackover

tomybuilding.Ontheway,IcallMerritt.

“Iwasjustthinkingaboutyou,”heanswersinsuchasexytone.

“Yeah,whatabout?”

“Hmmm,letmeclosemydoor.”Ihearthedoorlatch,andthenhesays,“Iwasthinkingabout

yourass.Fuck,Ilovedit.”

“Metoo.”

“Solisten,wemighthavealittleproblemwiththisweekend’splans.”

“What?No!Why?”

“There’sahugeoilcompanythatjustcameonthemarket.Thiswouldbemonumentalforour

companyandmeifIcanclosethedeal.Rightnow,I’mtryingtonaildownapriceandifIcan’t,I’ll

likelyhavetoflytoCaliforniatodoitinperson.”

“Can’tyourdaddoit?Helivesthere.”

“Youknowhecan’t.I’vegottoprovetohimthatI’mready.”

Myheart keeps sinkingfurther and furtherdown to the bottomof my stomach.As I enter my

building,Iimaginenotseeinghim‘tilnextweekend,andIsaytohim,“Idon’tthinkIcanmakeitnine

dayswithoutseeingyou.”

“Meneither,babe,that’swhyI’mgonnagetthisdealclosed,andit’snotgonnainterferewith

ourplans…butIhadtobehonest.”

“I’mbackatwork;Ishouldgo.”

“Don’tbedown.I’llgetitdone.”

Ihangupwithhimandwandertomydesk,bummedout.Sittingdown,IrealizethatI’mfalling

forhimandI’mnotsurehowithappenedandsodamnquickly.ThesamepatternsIalwaystryand

avoidalwaysseemtohappen,andthisiswhenthingsbegintogowrong.

Chapter36

Merritt

“ShouldIbookit,Mr.Smith?”SuzyasksmeasIstareatmycomputer,waitingforaresponsefrom

Exlon,thecompanywe’retryingtoacquire.

“Givemealittlelonger.”

Shewalksoff,andIpickupthephone,callingmycontactatthecompanytoseeifwe’vegotten

aresponse.Thereisnoanswer,andI’mpissedofftobedickedaroundsobadly.Icallmydad’soffice

toseeifthey’veheardanything.

Hisreceptionistpatchesmethrough,andIaskhimrakingmyfingersthroughmyhair,“Whatif

Idon’tclosethedeal?”

“Then I don’t think you’re ready to run this company.” I pace across my office, pissed, that

againit’scomingdowntoonedeal.“Weneedthisdeal,Merritt,morethanwe’veeverneededtoclose

adealbefore.”

“That’swhatyoualwaysfuckin’say,”Iscoffathim.“It’slikeyou’rechangingyourmindand

giving me a task that’s unrealistic. You know as well as I do that we aren’t going to come to terms

withthem.Theywantwaytoomuchmoney.”

“Merritt,you’renotlookingatthebiggerpicture.Thisishowwe’vegottentobeasbigaswe

are.Idon’thavemuchtimelefthere,andyouknowit.You’vegottaprovetomeyoucansteerthis

companyintothefuture.”

“I’mready,andyouknowIam.I’vebeenworkingmyassoffforyou,IgottheSerranosback,

andthisweekalone,I’veacquiredtennewsiteswithprimeoilreadyforustobegindrilling.”

“ClosingtheExlondealwillbelikeacquiringamillionnewsites,soifyouwantthiscompany,

thenclosethefuckingdeal.”

Lookingatmyownreflectionintheglasswindowofmyoffice,Icouldgooffonhimforso

many reasons. It’s always something else when it comes to him, another reason to stall or another

hooptojumpthrough.Healwayssays,“Youknowmytimeiscoming…”Butwhen?Ijusthopeinthe

endit’llallbeworthit.

Hanginguponhim,IbuzzSuzyandtellher,“Bookit.”

“Yes,sir,”shetellsme,andIhangup,hatingthatIhavetocallQuinnandtellherthatI’mnot

coming to Denver this weekend. But what other choice do I have? He’s leaving me with none, like

always.

Closingmyofficedoor,Idialhernumber,andsheanswersonthefirstring.

“Theflowersaregorgeous.”

“Yougotthem?”Iask,almostforgettingthatIhadSuzysendthemtoher.

“Idid,justnow.Theyaresittingonmydesk,andnowmyofficesmellslikeagarden.Ican’t

waitforyoutoseethem,I’llbringthemhometonight.”

“Aboutthat…Iwon’tmakeitafterall.IdohavetogotoCali.”

“Okay,” she sounds understanding, not the response I’d expected. I guess I don’t really know

whatIwasexpecting.

“Yousure?”

“Ofcourse,Iknowhowmuchyourworkmeanstoyou.I’llcatchuponsomeTVandseeyou

nextweekend.”

***

GlaringatmyfatherashesitsnexttomeduringourlunchwiththeExlonexecs,I’mpissedhe

showedup.Thiswassupposedtobeallme,mychancetoproveIwasreadytorunthecompany,and

nowhereheis.

“CanIgetanother?”Iaskthewaiter,pointingtomydrink.

I haven’t said much of anything this entire time, my dad being the center of attention like

always.

“Haven’tyouhadenough?”heasksme,leaningover,andIfinishtherestofthedrinkinfront

ofmenotansweringhim.

Myphonevibrates,andIpullitout,I’mhere,whereareyou?Quinntextsme.

Whatthefuck?

Likehere-here?Howisthatpossible?Lookingatmyphone,thescreenbecomesblurry.Fuck,I

drankalot.Itextherback.Where?

Cali, your hotel. Probably shouldn’t have given me access to your calendar. But I brought the

sash.

Nowanxioustoleaveandtakeoutsomeofmypent-upfrustrationsthewayIlovetomost,Iask

thequestionofthehour,“Solet’sbehonest.”Thegroupofsixmen,myfatherincluded,alllookat

me.Iclearmythroatandtrynottosoundsodrunk.“What’sitgonnataketoclosethedeal?”

Oneofthemenleansforward,restinghiselbowsonthetableandsaystome,“Ithinkabouta

halfmillionmore.”

“Whataboutapartnership?”Ioffer,knowing…Ihavetoclosethedeal.Hedidn’tsaywehadto

bethesoleowner,justtocloseit.

Themenallseemintrigued.Myfather,ontheotherhand,issuddenlytense.“Whatdidyouhave

inmind?”

“Letustakeoveryourleasesforoneyear,withtheoptiontobuyattheendoftheterm.It’llgive

youthecashyouneedfromgoingbankrupt,andit’llgiveustheoilweneedtoproducerevenue.”

Themenseemtoallbeconsideringit,andmyfathersays,“AsCEO,I’msorry,butI’monly

lookingtopurchaseyourcompany,onehundredpercent.”

“Ahalfmillionmore,”theirCEOsays,andthentheystand,shakingourhandsbeforeleaving

thetable.Myfather,asusual,ruinedthenegotiations.

“Whatthehellwasthat,Merritt?”hescoldsme.

“Youtoldmetoclosethedeal,soIwasclosingit.”

“ItoldyouIwantedtoacquirethem.”

“Sure, but you didn’t say how. And a lease-to-buy option is a good one. We’d have revenues

cominginnextmonth.Whichiswayfasterthantheprocessofpurchasingthemisgoingtobe.You

know with lawyers and paperwork, it’ll at least be a year, and what, are you gonna stay until that’s

donetoo?”

Hedoesn’tanswerme,andIwalkawayfrommydad.He’spissedandhotonmyheels.“You

don’thavetheauthoritytomakethosedecisions,”hesays.

“OfcourseIdon’t,‘causehadIcomeherealonelikeI’dplanned,I’dhavethedealclosed,but

withouttheauthoritytodoit.”

Walking up to my hotel, my dad walks off not saying anything else. I hope he feels fuckin’

stupidforshootingdownmyidea,‘causehe’sgottaknowit’sbrilliantandthebestwaytoacquireone

ofthelargestcommercialoilproducingcompanies.

MythoughtsarecutshortasIspotQuinn,asgorgeousasever,sittinginoneofthechairsinthe

lobby.She’sreallyhere,andIhavenocluehowIgotsogoddamnlucky.Butthisshitdayjustturned

completelyaround.

Chapter37

Quinn

“Ican’tbelieveyou’rehere,”Merrittsays,takingmeinhisarmsandpinningmedownonthebed.

“Icouldn’thelpmyself.”

“IsthatwhyyouweresocoolwhenIsaidIcouldn’tcome?”

“Uhhuh,”Itellhim,becauseaswetalkedonthephoneearlier,Iwasalreadybookingmyflight.

“Fuck, I’ve missed you,” he tells me, pressing me hard into the mattress and kissing me.

Holdingontothebackofhishead,Ikickmyshoesoffandworkmytongueagainsthis.

Hepullsbackforasecond;hiseyesareglazedoverandred.“Areyoudrunk?”Iask.

“Maybealittle,”heconfessesandslidesoffme,pushingmydressupandfingeringme.

“Howwasyourmeeting?”Iask,worriedthathe’sdrunkandhandlingbusiness.

“It sucked. My asshole of a dad showed up, and it really made me wonder why I even came

here.”He’snolongerfingeringme,justcuppingmysexandIcantellthathisbrainisspinning.

“Letitgo,baby.Don’tlethimintoyourhead.We’retogethernow,andyoucanfocusonmeall

nightlong.”

Henodsandkissesmyneck.Takinghimbytheshoulders,Irollhimontohisback.Heletsme

straddlehim,hishandsbothrestingonmythighs.Liftingmydressovermyhead,mytitsspringfree

andhiseyesgetwide.“Youflewwithoutabraandpantieson?”

“Maybe.Doesthatturnyouon?”

“Alot!”

Leaning down, I kiss his neck, nibbling and sucking on his skin, and he moves his hands

squeezingmyasscheeks,spreadingthemwide.

Ourbodiesgrindtogether,likeacoupleofhighschoolersdryhumping,andImakequickwork

ofremovinghispants.Hishardcockmakesmeunbelievablywet,andIdon’twasteasecondbeforeI

settledownonit,mypussyclenchinghimashepusheshimselfupinsideme.

Knottingmyfingersintomyhair,Ibouncewithhim,hisballshittingmyasswitheverythrust,

he’smovingsofast,andthenhestops.Lookingdownathim,he’sgotthatlook—theonethatsayshe

wantsmore,needsmore.Withoutasingleword,Iliftoffofhim.Hespreadsmycheekswide,andI

reachback,clenchinghissloppydickasIlineitupwithmyass.

Ourbodiesconnectlikeapuzzle,hefitsrightinsideofme.Thefeelingoffullnessmakesme

wanttocomeundone.Stillholdingmyasshepumpshimselfinandoutofme,givingmeeverysingle

inchthatheis.MynoisesarcandmybreathingissoquickthatIwon’tlastmuchlonger.

Ifighttostayincontrol,butit’stoomuch.Myinsidesquiverandtheinstanthereallypicksup

speed,Icomehard.“Fuck!Fuck!Fuck!”Ichant,havinganunbelievablyintenseorgasm.Eachstream

ofhiswhiteishotinsideofme,andashefinishes,heflipsmeontomyback,rippinghisshirtoffas

hepummelsintome.Onehandissplayedacrossmychestwhilehisotherholdsoneofmylegstothe

side.

He’s ruthless, fucking me harder than ever, my body scooting up the bed. I reach above me,

pressingmyfingerstotheheadboardtokeepmyselfinplace.

“Youlikebeingfuckedhard?”heasksmeinadeep,sexytone.

“Yes.”

Oureyesareconnected,lockedoneachother ’sinawhirlwindofsex.WithMerritt,thereareno

rulesorboundaries,justeachother ’srawestdesires,andhebringssomanydesiresoutofme.Every

singlehiddenfantasythatIhave,Iwanttoexperiencethemallwithhim.

***

“Shouldweorderroomservice?”IaskMerritt,asIdryofffromourshower.

“Ifyouwantto,butwecanalsogoout.”

“Whateveryouwanttodoisfinewithme.”Hewalksupbehindme,hislargehandsroaming

mybodyasherubsupanddownit.

“Weshouldgoout,”Itellhim,knowingifwestayin,allwe’lldoisfuck,andasmuchasIlove

it,Ineedtobeabletowalknormallyformydad’sbirthdayMondaynight.

“God,you’rebeautiful,”hetellsme,kissingmyneckandthengettingdressedhimself.

“Thank you. Would you put this on me?” I ask handing him my bracelet he bought for me in

Steamboat.

“Didyoueverputawishinside?”

“Idid.”

“What’sitsay?”heasksmecuriously.

“I’mnottellingyou,oritwon’tcometrue.”

Herollshiseyesatmeandpretendstoopenthebox.Ismackhisarm,andheactslikeIhave

superhumanstrengthandactuallyhurthim.Givinghimahug,IkissthespotIhit.Buthetriestoopen

mybraceletagain.

“Fine,fine,I’lltellyou.”

“Youwill?”

“Yeah,‘causeit’salreadycometrue.”

“Thentellme.”

“I’mjustjoking.”Igrinfromeartoearandgrabmypurse,waitingforMerrittatthedoor.He

spanks me as he opens the door, and we wander down the hall hand in hand. He presses the down

buttonontheelevatorandsaystome,“Haveyoueverfuckedinanelevator?”

“No,you?”

“Nope,wannatry?”

Inodandraisemyeyebrowstohim.Asthedoorsopen,wegotostepin,butsomeoneexitsand

whenIseetheguystandingthere,myworldhalts.

“Dad,”Merrittsays,andI…Whatthefuckisgoingon?Ihavenocluehowthisisevenfucking

possible.Merritt’sdaddoesn’tanswer.Insteadhe’sstaringatme,thesamewayheusedto,thesame

lookhegavemethatmademefallforhiminthefirstplace.

“Ididn’tknowyouhadcompany,son.”

“Oh yeah, this is my girlfriend, Quinn. She flew in and surprised me. Quinn, this is my dad,

Charles.”Iswallownotsurehowtorespond,andhestretchesouthishandinafriendlygestureasif

hedoesn’tknowme.“It’sapleasuretomeetyou,Quinn.”

AsIshakehishandback,I’mstunned,sicktomystomach,andnotsurewhattodo.

Chapter38

Merritt

Theyshakehands,andhesaystome,“Merritt,Iwasjustcominguptoseeyou.Igottothinkingabout

yourideawithExlon,anditmightnotbesuchabadwaytogo.”

“Really?”Iaskhimshocked.

“Yeah, I mean, we do need the revenue, and I’m not gonna stick around for much longer. We

shoulddiscussitmore.”

“QuinnandIweregoingtogrababitetoeat,doyouwannatalkafterwards?”

“Ihaveameeting,”hesays,andIlookatQuinn,hopingshedoesn’tmindifIinvitehim.She

smilesatme,andIsqueezeherhand.

“Wannajoinus?”

“Sure,ifyoudon’tmind?”helooksatQuinn,andshesays,“Oh,notatall.”

He presses the call button on the elevator and says to us, “So how long have you two been

together?”

“What’sitbeen,babe?”Iaskher,andsheshrugshershoulders,seeminglyquiet.

“Afewmonths.”

“Howdidyoumeet?”heasks.

“Onthattrip,AriinvitedmetoinColorado.”

“Ahhh,soyouknowAri?”

Shenodsandhesays,“Whereshouldweeat?”

“Wherever.”

Wefollowmydadintotherestaurantatthehotelandgetseatedrightaway.Quinnhasn’tsaid

much,andit’snotlikehertobequiet.“Areyouokay?”Iaskher.

“Yeah,I’mjustgettingamigraine,that’sall.”

“Thisokay?”mydadasksus.

“Yeah, it’s great,” I respond and open my menu. I glance over mine and decide on steak and

eggs.Thennoticemydadhasn’ttouchedhis,he’sstudyingQuinninaverypeculiarway.

“SowhatmadeyouchangeyourmindonExlon?”Iaskhim.

“I was going to wait to tell you this on your birthday, but December 31st will be my last day

with the company. That’s why I’ve been pushing you so hard. So we don’t have much time. I’ve

contactedourlegalteam,andtheyaredraftingupthepaperworkaswespeak.”

“Wow,okay.”

Thenewskindacomesasashock.Imean,Ikneworhopeditwaseventuallycoming,butjust

yesterday he was busting my balls about being ready to run the company, and now he’s having the

paperworkdraftedforit.

“SoIthinkweshouldmoveforwardwithExloninthewayyouproposed.Itrustyoucanclose

thedeal,howeveryouseefit?”

“Absolutely.”

I’mstunnedsittinghere.I’vegotthegirlofmydreamsandwhatI’veworkedallmylifefor,is

finallycomingtrue.

“So,Quinn,whatisitthatyoudoforaliving?”heasksher.

“I’minthefinancialindustry.”

“Oh,whatdoyoudo?”

“I’maninvestmentadvisor.”

“Nice,Ishouldreallygetoneofthose.Doyouhaveacard?”

“Quinn doesn’t work with people she knows,” I tell him, trying to save her from the

awkwardness.Shealreadyseemsquietandnotherself,soIdon’twanthertohavetoexplaintomy

dad,whoshejustmet,thatshecan’thelphim.

“Probablybetter,I’vebeentheremyself.MerrittandIhavehadourfairshareofissues.”

As I look at my dad, his sudden change in attitude is so bizarre that I begin to wonder if he’s

puttingonashowforQuinn.Andifheis…why?He’snotonetocarewhatothersthinkabouthim,so

whystartnow?

***

“Well,thatwasweird,”ItellQuinnaswegetbacktoourroomfrombreakfast.

“Whatwas?”

“Uhhh,mydad,beingallnice.Iknowyoudon’tknowhim,butthat’snothowhenormallyis.

Doyoureallythinkhe’sactuallydraftingupthedocumentsforthebusiness?”

“Ifhesaysso,I’msureheis.”Quinnliesdownonthebed;hereyesareheavy,andIcantellher

headiskillingher.“Doyouhaveanymedicinehere?”Iask.

“No,Ileftitallathome.”

“Wantmetogoandgetyousomethingfromthepharmacy?”

“Youdon’thaveto,justholdme.”

Kickingoffmyshoes,Ilinemybodyalonghersandwrapherinmyarms.Breathingherin.

Herscentissoamazing.I’mnotsurehoweverythingturnedoutthewayitdid,butithas,andsoonI’ll

be taking the first real step in owning my own company. All of my years of hard work are finally

payingoff.

Chapter39

Quinn

WatchingMerrittleavesohecangomeetwithExlon,I’mstillsosicktomystomach,andmentally

I…I’mamess,sofuckedupaboutallofthis,andnotsurewhattodo.I’mlyingtohim,andIhateit.

Butwhatdo Isayto him?Howdo Itellhim? Ikeep askingmyselfover andover,and eachtime,I

comeupwithnothing.

Mypalmsaresweaty,andmyinsidesaresickwithdeceit.Ican’tbeartohurthim;he’sbeenso

goodtome.Bitingmythumbnail,thereisaknockonthedoor.Gettinguptoanswerit,Iassumeit’s

Merritt,andheforgotsomething,butasIlookoutthepeephole,it’sCharles,andI’mnotsurewhatto

do.

“Quinn,Iknowyou’reinthere.”

Placingmyhandonthehandle,Iturnitasmyheartraces,andhestepsinside.Ibackupandsit

downonthebed,barelyabletolookathim.He’sstandinginthemiddleoftheroom,glaringdown

me,andIhatemyselfsobad.“Whyareyoudoingthis?”Ican’tanswerhim;Ican’tevenlookathim.

“Areyoudoingthistogetbackatme?”

I swallow and remind myself to remain in control. I remember how Charles can be—very

unreasonable.“Ididn’tknowhewasyourson.”

“Ohcomeon,youexpectmetobelievethat?You’remyfinancialadvisor.Youknoweverything

aboutme.”

“Idon’t.Inevermanagedyouraccountsfromthedaytheycameintoouroffice.”

“That’salie,andyouknowit.Yougloatedaboutsigningme.Boughtthatshinynewcar.”

“Ididn’t,andthat’sthefuckingtruth.”

“Soyouwantmetobelievethatyoubeingwithmysonisamerecoincidence?”

“Yes,itis.HonesttoGod.”

“Honey,youneedtogetbetteratlying.Evenyoucan’tbelievethat.”

“I’m not your ‘honey.’ Merritt told you we met on vacation in Colorado, through Ari. How

couldIhaveknownhewasgoingtobethere?Igoonthosetripseveryyear.”

“I’m not buying what you’re selling. I think this is your way of getting back at me because I

endedthings.”

“It’snot,Ilovehim.WhatheandIhaveisreal.Wehavetotellhimaboutus.”

“You’renottellinghimshit!”

“ThehellI’mnot.Youcan’ttellmewhattodoanymore.”

“Comeon,Quinn,webothknowyou’renotgoodenoughforhim.You’rejustamoney-hungry

whore.Nameyourprice,andI’llletyouwalk,he’llneverknow.ButIdon’tneedyouinhishead.”

“I’mnotleavinghim,andmostdefinitelydon’thaveaprice.”

Hestepsclosetome,thesmellofhiscolognenownauseatingtomeandhesays,“Ifyouwon’t

leavehim,thenI’llshowhimthethingsyou’vedonewithme.Irecordedthemall.”

“Youdidn’trecordshit,youfuckingbastard.”

“Thechoiceisyours,sweetheart.Doyouthinkmyson’sgonnawantyouafterheseesyouare

mysloppyseconds?”

Iopenthedoortothehotelroom,angerblazinginmyeyes.“Go!”Ishout,andhetriestotouch

measIpushhimout.“Keepyourfuckinghandsoffme,”Iyellandslamit.

Slidingdowntothefloor,huddlingmykneestomychest,Isobuncontrollablylikeababy.How

couldhedothis?DoeshereallynotcareaboutMerritt’shappinessatall?

Thinking of everything makes me so sick. This will crush him. Charles is right—he’ll never

lookatmethesamewayagain,nomatterwhat.

Pickingupmyphone,Ineedtohavetheupperhand.IhavetogettoMerrittbeforehisdaddoes

ifIwantanychanceofsavingthisrelationship.Butlookingatthescreenofmyphone,Ican’tbring

myselftocallhim.I’mjustinshock—stunnedthatthisismyreality.

Deepdown,mygutistellingmethatCharlesdoesn’thaveavideo.I’dknowifherecordedus

doinganything,soit’smywordagainsthis.Iimaginewhatit’lldotoMerrittfindingout,andIcan’t

dothattohim.Hemeanstoomuchtome.

Butwhatifsomehow,thereisavideo,thenwhat?IdecidetosendMerrittatexttogethimback

here,totalktohim,heneedstohearthisfromme.

ButasItypethewords,theynauseateme.Runningintotherestroom,Ithroweverythingupand

lieonthecoldtilefloor.Ican’thurthim.Ican’timaginethewayhe’dlookatme.

Completelyfucked,Istareupattheceiling,brokenfromtheinsideout.Whyisthishappening

tome…why?

***

Waiting for Merritt to return from his meeting, I’m on edge. My mind is constantly battling

withinitselfaboutwhattodo.AndasIfeellikeI’mabouttoloseit…hewalksintotheroom.

“Youknow,Iloveknowingyou’rewaitingforme,baby.”

Iaboutcry,imaginingthatsoon,hewon’twantmewaitingforhim.“Howwasyourmeeting?”I

barelychokeoutthewords,tryingtosettlemybelly.

“Itwasgood,Iclosedthedeal,babe.”

Heissohappy,Icanseetheexcitementalloverhisface,andIcan’tbringhimdownrightnow.

Inside,Ihatemyself.ThismanthatI’vegrowntoloveanddependonsomuch,whoismyeverything,

doesn’t know what I’ve done. Even though it wasn’t intentional, it’ll eventually come out, and that

scaresme.Charlesisatickingtimebomb.Atanyminute,he’llruinitall,videoornot.Butlooking

intohiseyes,Ijustneedonemorenormalday,beforeIlethimgo.

“I’msohappyforyou,babe,”Itellhimandholdhimclose.

“It’sthefirststepinsecuringourfuture.”

“Yeah?”Iask,hatingthatitcan’tbetrue.Thisisthefirsthe’sspokenofafuturetogether,andit

won’thappen.

“Yeah,whatdidyouthink?I’dgetthecompany,andwe’dstillbetravelingeveryweekend?”

“Well,I’dhopednot,Iguess.”

Hekissesme,andIkisshimback,prayingtoGodthatsomehow,ourtimedoesn’tend,thatwe

canpersevereandlastforever.

“Youguess?”Hiseyebrowsriseashelooksdeepintomyeyes.

“YouknowwhatImean.”

“Ido,I’mjustteasingyou.I’msohappyrightnow;weshouldcelebrate.”

“Whatdidyouhaveinmind?”

“Justthis…”hesays,“Justthis,baby…”

Chapter40

Merritt

“Doessixo’clockwork?”Suzyasksme,andIlookatmycalendartobesureIdon’thaveanything

pressingsoIcanpickQuinnupfromtheairport.

“Yeah,that’sgoodwithme.DidyourunitbyQuinn?”

“Idid,she’llbeabletoleaveworkearly.”Mydadpopshisheadin,workingoutofouroffice

allweek,andtomysurprise,he’sbeenprettycool.

“Quinncominghere?”

“Sheis—Friday.”

“Allright.Well,Ishouldbegettingthedraftbackofthedocuments.Iwantedtogooverthem

withyouwhentheycomeinifyouhavetime.”

“Ofcourse.I’llhavetime.”

“Great,I’llhaveSuzyaddittoyourcalendarassoonastheycomein.”

“Thanks,Dad.”Myphonerings,andwebothglancedownatitonmydesk.It’sQuinn.“I’lllet

youtakethat,”hesays,andasheleaves,Ican’thelpbutthink,maybenowhe’sbecomingthefatherI

lostallthoseyearsago.

“Hey,babe,”

“Guesswhat?”

“Ummm,Ihavenoidea,justtellme.”

“IgotusticketstotheNuggetsgamenextweekend.”

“Again?”

“Yep,samecourtsideseatstoo.”

“Man,howdidIgetsoluckytosnagyourfineass?”

“Icouldsaythesamething.”Myphonevibrates,andIpullitaway,noticingatextfrommydad.

“Hangon,babe.”

“‘Kay.”

AsIopenitup,it’savideo.ThewholeworldaroundmefreezesasIclick“play.”Betrayallike

noothertakesover,andIcan’tbelievemyeyes.It’sQuinnandmydad…together.

Vomit rises in the back of my throat, and I try to hold it back, but as I watch the woman I’ve

growntolovehavesexwithmyownfather…Iloseit,gaggingandthrowingupinmytrashcan.

I drop my phone to the floor, her voice as she says his name sounds just like when she says

mine,andIdon’twanttobelievewhatI’mseeing.Itcan’tbetrue…canit?

“Mr.Smith,areyouokay?”Suzyasks,andIshakemyheadholdingontothecan.“Closethedoor,”I

shout and right away she does. Pulling myself together enough to speak, I pick my phone back up;

Quinnisstillthere,andIaskher,“Whenwereyougoingtotellme,orwereyou?”

Verycalmlyshesaystome,“Youhavetoletmeexplaineverything.”

“Explain?There’snothingtoexplain.Youliedtome.”

“Ididn’tmeanto.”

“Goddammit,howdoyouaccidentlylietosomeone,Quinn?”

She sobs, and as much as I just want to hang up on her, I have to know more. How? Why?

When?“You’vegottatalktome,Quinn,orI’mgonnafuckinglosemymind.Myfatherjustsentmea

videoofyouhavingsexwithhim,andit’sallIcanthinkabout.”

“He was in Denver for a meeting way before I knew you. I met him when I was out having

drinkswithsomeco-workers.”

“Soyousleptwithhim?Amandoubleyourage?”

“I’msosorry,baby.”

“AmIdreaming?”AndIask,“Isheyourex?”

“Yes. He’s the one you emailed, but you have to believe me that I didn’t know you two were

related.”Whatthefuck?AmIhearingherright?

“Mydad?”Irepeatsoftly;tearsareinmyeyesandthatvilefeelingofdespairreeksinsideof

me.Closingmyeyes,theusualbeautifulvisionofherface—thatnotlongagowasmysalvation—has

beendestroyed.AllIcanseeisherandmyfather.

“I’msosorry,Merritt.Ihadno—”

Icutheroff,“Wehavethesamelastnameandworkforthesamecompany.Howdidyounot

know?”

“Ididn’teventhinkaboutthelastname…Smithissocommon.AndyouknowIkeptmyhands

outofthedealwhenIsignedhim.Youhavetobelieveme,Merritt.Ipromise,baby.”

“Butyousleptwithhim,Quinn,andthensatatbreakfastinCaliforniaandactedlikeeverything

wasnormal,likeyoutwowerestrangerswhenhe…he’sbeeninsideofyouandthenIwasinsideof

you.HowamIsupposedtogetpastthat?”Sayingthewordsmakesmefuckingillagain.

“Idon’tknow,”shesays,andIdon’tknoweither…Ican’tbewithsomeonewhowouldlieright

tomyface.Acoincidenceornot,shewasn’thonestaboutthis,sowhatelsehassheliedtomeabout?

“Ican’tbewithyouanymore.”

“Please,don’tdothis.Youhavetobelieveme.Iloveyou,Merritt,”shebegsmeandherwords

sickenme,howcansheevensaythatoraskmethat?

“Ifuckinglovedyoutoo,andyouruinedthat.Goodbye,Quinn.”Pressingtheendbuttononmy

phoneisthehardestthingI’veeverdone.I’velosthalfofmyself.WhatIthoughtwasthegoodhalf,

my Quinn, was all a lie, and my dad, how could he? Getting up, I roll up my sleeves and storm

towardshisoffice,readytomakehimpay.Hedidn’tneedtosendmethevideo;hecould’vetoldme,

mantoman.Andshehadevenmorechancestotellme.

Myinsidesareamess.Acompletefuckingmess!Angerfillsme,everythingthatIoncethought

wasmyfoundationandIcouldcountonhasallbeenalie.Iftheycouldkeepthisfromme…whatelse

aretheyhiding?

Chapter41

Quinn

Haveyoueverfeltlikeyouweredead?Likepartofyoudied,andinsideofyounowthereisahuge

gaping hole? As I lie on my couch, my arm hanging off it, dangling over the soft carpet, that is

exactlyhowIfeel…dead.

Part of me died when Charles sent the video to Merritt. I underestimated Charles, which was

ultimatelymybiggestmistake.Ishould’vecomecleanwithMerrittinCaliforniaandbeenopenwith

him.Ishould’vefollowedmygut,evenifithurthim,andI’llalwaysregretthatmost.Itwasmyone

chancetosaveus,andIdidn’tdothat.

There’saknockonmydoor,andIgetuptoletWillowin.Shedidn’tneedtodrivealltheway

uphere;ItoldherIwasfine.Butshewasworriedaboutme,andIguessI’ddothesameifshewere

going through what I am. “How are you doing?” she asks me, as I flop back down flat on my face

beforeshecanevengivemeahug.

“I’mokay,”Igrumble,myvoicecrackingbecausemythroatissodryandIhaven’ttalkedfor

days.

“Youdon’tlooklikeit.Whenwasthelasttimeyouateordrankanything?”

Ishrugmyshoulders,andshetakesaholdofthemsittingmeup,“Goddammit,Quinn,snapout

ofit,you’rescaringme.”

“I’mfine.Iatelastnight!”

“Good.Nowyouneedtogetyourassupandtakeafuckingshower.Youstink.”

“Idon’tstink,”ItellherandsmelltheshirtI’mwearing—Merritt’sshirt.Itstillholdshisscent

andinstantlybringstearstomyeyes.IsoblikeI’vebeendoingfordaysnow,somehowmybodystill

producing the tears. Willow holds me and lets me be, the feeling of her arms around me, anyone’s

armsaroundme,issoreassuring.GivingmehopethatI’mgoingtobeokay.

“Comeon,let’sgetyouinthebath.”

Following Willow, I feel wobbly, but she won’t take no for an answer. As I strip naked, the

smelloflavenderfillstheair,remindingmeofthelasttimeItookabath.Itwasinhere…withMerritt.

Tears again consume me, and as she helps me into the bath, my teeth chatter, and she says, “Even

thoughyoudon’twanttotalkaboutwhathappenedagain,Ireallythinkitwouldbegoodtogetitall

offyourchest.”

SinkingasfardownintothetubasIcan,tryingtowarmmyself,Iknowshe’sright.Idon’twant

totalkaboutwhathappened.AfterMerrittbrokeupwithme,Iwasamessandcouldbarelymakeit

home from work. Right away, I called Willow, and she talked me through things and has been

checkinginonmeeveryday.She’salsotryingtogetmetotalkaboutwhathappened…butIcan’t.

“HasArisaidanythingtoyouabouthim?”Iaskher,hopingshe’sheardsomethingandthathe

isokay.

“No,hehasn’t.”

“Okay.”

“Areyounotgoingtotalktomeaboutit?”

“Whatdoyouwantmetosay?”Isnapatherandhereyesgetwide.

“Ineedtoknowhowitwaspossible.”

“Howwhatwaspossible?”

“Thatyoudidn’tknowMerrittwasCharles’son.”

“DoyouthinkI’mlying,Willow?”Iquestionherandsitallthewayup,suddenlyoffended.

“No,honey,notatall.ButifIknowhow,thenmaybeIcanhelpandtalktoMerrittforyou.”

“Thereisnotalkingtohim.IliedwhenIfoundout,andhesawavideoofmewithhisdad.”

“Ohshit.Butatthetimeyoudidn’tknowhewashisdad?”

“Ofcoursenot,Itoldyouthat.Ididn’tevenknowMerrittexistedwhenIwaswithCharles.His

dadismyex,Willow,plainandsimple.Ialreadytoldyouallofthis,”Igetagitatedeasily,feelinglike

everyoneisagainstme.

“Calmdown;Ijustwanttounderstandhowyoudidn’tknowtheywererelated.”

Ishakemyhead.Mybestfriendevidentlydoesn’tbelieveme,anditmakesmesick.Outofall

peopleintheworld,IthoughtIcouldatleastdependonher…butIguessnot.

Chapter42

Merritt

Copingwithbetrayalnevergetseasier.Itseemsdeathiseasiertoprocess.Youfindpeaceinknowing

theonesyou’velosthavegoneontoabetterplace.Butwithbetrayal,theonesyoulostandeveryone

involvedseemtoconsumeyourmindremindingyouofwhatthey’vedone.

Myfather,forstarters,isafuckingbitchandsetitallup.HeknewQuinnwascallingme,itwas

theperfecttimetoruinus,andthenheskippedout,andIhaven’tspokentohimsincehesentmethe

video.

Igetwhymydaddidit.Whyhewantedtohurtme,eventhoughtherestoftheworlddoesn’t

know,andwhenIwentintohisofficetoconfronthim,hewasgone.Ofcoursehewas—he’safucking

coward.Ishould’veknownhe’druinmylifeonewayoranother.He’snotevenmyrealfather,asfar

asDNAgoes.Mymothercheatedonhimandhadme,andheactedlikeIwashis,butdeepdownhe

alwaysdespisedme.ThelossofmymomwassotremendousthatIthoughtIowedittonotjusthim,

buther,tostickbyhim.Iwasmakingupforhermistakeallalongwhenitwasn’tmyplace.

Sittingoutonmybackdeck,mymindkeepsspinningthesamewayithasbeenfordays,andI

can’tshakethethoughtthatthiswasallasetup.Imean,howcoulditbeacoincidence?

Hell,maybeAriisinonittoo.Heandmyfathercouldbetryingtopushmeoutofthebusiness.

He was always my father ’s favorite, until he left, but maybe it was just a show. The same way

everythingbetweenQuinnandIwas…justashow.

Pickingupmyphone,IdialAri.Ihavetoknow;didhesetthisallup?Didheknowallalong

thatQuinnhadbeenwithmyfather?

Hedoesn’tanswer,whichisnotlikehim,butcometothinkaboutit,Ihaven’tbeenabletoget

aholdofhimmuchlately.

CallingSuzy,sheanswersrightaway,stillattheoffice.“Hi,Mr.Smith.”

“Hey, I’m glad you’re still there. You have Natalie’s calendar access for when she’s gone,

right?”Natalieismyfather ’sassistant,andifIcan’tgetaholdofAri,Icanatleastconfrontmydad.

“Yes,sir,Ido.”

“Couldyoulookatmydad’scalendarandtellmeifhehasanydinnermeetingstonight?”

“Um,hedoesfromsix‘tileightatSheaRouge,butI’mnotsurewhoit’swith.”

“Awesome,that’swhatIneeded.”

Ihangupwithher,gratefultohaveherhelp.SheaRougeisintown,whichmeansmydadisstill

here.Grabbingmycarkeys,Imakethetripacrosstownandvalet.

Walkinginsidetheupscalerestaurant,theatmosphereinhereiscalmandrelaxed.It’srighton

thewater,andtherearetonsofboatsdockedatthemarina.Takingaseatatthebar,thebartenderasks

me,“WhatcanIgetya?”

“I’lltakeawater,please.”

Ineedtobeclear-headedandonmytoes,ifmygutisright.Lookingaround,thesunissetting,

but outside, I spot my father and…Ari. They are deep in conversation, laughing and enjoying each

otherliketheyarebestfriends.AndimmediatelyI’mawaretheyareworkingagainstme.Pullingout

my cell phone, I dial Ari. He looks down at his ringing phone and ignores my call, sending me

straighttohisvoicemail.

Leaving the water I ordered on the bar, I head towards them. My father laughs and places his

handonhisshoulder,andIpulloutachair,sittingdown,shockingbothofthemwithmypresence.

“Merritt,” my dad smiles a devilish grin, and for the first time ever, I acknowledge him as,

“Charles,”andthenturntogreetthelatestadditiontothelistofpeopleInolongertrust,“Ari.”

“Wewerejustgonnacallyou,”Arisays,likeafuckingpussy.

“Really,‘causeIjustwatchedyouignoremyphonecall.”

Theylookateachother,andthenmydad,orshouldIsayCharles,putshishandsupandsays,

“Okay,yougotus.Wewereplanningapartyforyouwhenyoutakeoverthecompany.”

“Fuckyouboth.”Charlessmiles,andIaskthem,“Sowasthisyourplanallalong?Tofuckme

outofthebusinessI’veworkedmyentirelifefor?”

“Let’sbehonest,Merritt,youwerenevercutouttorunthecompany,notthewayAriis.”

“Sowhynotfiremethen,youfuckingpussy?”

“Becausewhenyouleaveonyourown,I’mdonewithyouandneitherofusispayingyouacent

more.”

“Neitherofus?Hedoesn’tevenworkforyou.”

“Oh,buthedoes.He’sbeendoingplentytomakethisthebiggestmergerinthehistoryofthe

Americanoilandgasindustry.”Ariwon’tevenlookatme.Thebitchbetrayedmeandnowisn’tman

enough to own up to it. It all makes sense now, the drama with the Serranos, the stocks, the deal in

Steamboatmydad“offeredamilliondollarsmorefor.”Itwasallforhisbenefit,andtheyplayedme.

“Ari left so when he takes over the company, he can bring Azures’ business too. I didn’t build this

empiretoturnitovertosomemistakeofachildandnothaveitbethelargestoilandgascompanyin

theworld.”

“Fuckyouboth.You’remeantforeachother,youknowthat?”

“Oh,lookatyougettingallhurt.Whydon’tyourunalongtothatslutItookadvantageof.I’m

sureshe’llstillwantyoubecausewe’refuckingdonewithyou.”

IignoremyfatherandlookatAri,andhefinallybringshiseyestomeetmine.“Isitalltrue?”

Henods,andeventhoughIknewitwas,havinghimconfirmitisaterribleblow.“WhyQuinn?Why

bringherintoallofthis?”

“It was easy, man,” Ari says. “I knew you’d fall for her as soon as I put you two in that

bedroom.Justlookather.Youbothwerefuckingpuppets.”Standingup,Ilayahardrighthookinto

his face. His chair flies backwards with him in it, and Charles sits stunned, looking at me as Ari

stumblestohisfeet,obviouslywobbled.Theguestsalllookinourdirection,andItellmydad,“He’s

your fucking problem now. Just feel lucky I don’t do the same to you. I’d probably kill your frail

ass.”

Iwalkoff,lookingbackatArionelasttime.He’shalfconscious.Ireallyshouldmopthefloor

withbothofthem.ThenewsofwhatQuinndidisreallynothingcomparedtothisbetrayal.

Chapter43

Quinn

Lookingat my computerscreen, I’m notsure how I’m goingto get throughthe entire day. Willow

recommendedIcomebacktowork,andatthetime,Ithoughtitwasagoodidea.Butsittinghere,the

faintsmelloftheflowersMerrittsentmestillwaftingintheair,loomingfrommytrashcan,andIjust

can’tstopstaringatthepictureofusonmycomputerscreen.

God, it hurts. It’s the most excruciating pain I’ve ever dealt with, and I want it to go away.

Lookingdownatmybracelet,theoneheboughtforme,Ipopitopenandtakeoutthetiny,tattered

pieceofpaper.AsIunfoldit,theinkhasfaded,butstillfaintlyvisibleishisname,Merritt.Whatwas

awishofminenotsolongago,nowwillnevercometrue.

Throughasob,Ichokebackthetearsanddropitintomytrash.I’vegottolethimgo…Ihave

to.

“Quinn,”thereceptionistcallsthroughmyphone,almostmakingmejumpoutofmyskin.

“Yeah.”Itryandsoundsomewhatnormal.

“Yourninethirtyisintheconferenceroom.”

“Okay,”Ianswerback,caughtoffguard.Idon’thaveacluewhomyninethirtyisorwhattodo

aboutit.Goingintomycalendar,Iwaitforittoloadandit’stakingforever.

Goddammit!

GrabbingmyiPadsoIcansearchthecompanynameifneededandflybytheseatofmypants,I

makemywayacrosstheofficeandstopatthedoor,swallowingandtakinginabreathofairbeforeI

goinandputonafakehappypersona.

ButasIopenitandstepin,thewindisknockedfrommylungsandIfreeze.Everythingaround

me slows. My senses that weeks ago died suddenly come back alive breathing him in, and I stand

unabletomove.

Merritt is sitting at the head of the conference table, his brown eyes hard to read. Why is he

here?Hehatesme.TheninthatcommandingvoicethatI’lldoanythingfor,heordersmetoclosethe

door.

GentlyIdoandtakeaseatacrossfromhim,preparedforthewrathofwhatisnext.Infrontof

himisafolder.I’msureit’sofmorepicturesorsomethingthathisdadsenthim,andIbegintofeelas

thoughIcouldhyperventilate.

“Howareyou?”heasks.

Inod,stillnotspeaking,andhesays,“It’sgoodtoseeyou.”

“You too.” My voice trembles; this is harder than I ever imagined it would be. He opens the

folderandhandsmeapieceofpaper.“What’sthis?”Iasklookingdownattheblankwhitesheet.

“Youtellme,whatdoyousee?”

“Nothing,”I’mconfused,butlately,that’sallIam.

“Iseesomethingdifferent.”

Iflipitover,thebackisblanktoo,andItellhim,“I’msorry,butmybrainismushlately.”

“Pleasedon’tbesorry,Quinn.”Hearinghimsaythosewordswhenthat’sallIshouldbemakes

me cry. Why is he doing this? “I see a blank page with nothing but possibility on it.” He slides me

overapenandtellsme,“Ifyoucouldhaveanythinginthisworld,whatwoulditbe?”

I write the word you, very small, knowing he’s got to just be playing a game with me. It’s

payback, I’m sure, but being in his presence, I can’t deny what I want. There is no way he’ll ever

forgivemeorlookatmethesameway,howcouldhe?Icanbarelyforgivemyselfforlyingtohim.

Ipasshimbackthepaper,andheopensthefolder.Insideisanotherone,andinhisverylarge

handwritingistheword,YOU.

Readingit,itishardtobelieve.Tearsfillmyeyes,andhesaystome,“Iknowyouhadnoidea

myfatherandIwererelated,and…Iforgiveyoufornottellingmeassoonasyoufoundout.That

must’vebeenahardmomentforyou.”

“Whywouldyouforgiveme?”Iask,needingtoknowhisreasoning.

“Becauseyouweresetup,andsowasI.”

“Whatdoyoumean?”

“CharlesandArihavebeenworkingtogethertopushmeoutofthebusiness.Fromthemoment

youmetmydad,itwasallpartofaplantogetridofme.”

“Whatthefuck,why?”

“IguessbecauseI’mnothisson,”hetellsme,therevelationisagiantsurprise.Asheexplains

further, it all makes sense, but understanding how Ari had a hand in it all doesn’t add up. “But you

boughtAri’sstocksandgavehimthemoneyforthem.”

“It’sallsuchashame.I’velivedandbreathedforthatcompanysinceIwaseighteenyearsold,

andallalongbothofthemwereworkingagainstme.”

“IgetwhyCharlesdidit,butwhyAri?”

“We’veallgotaprice,somemorethanothers.Ariwaswillingtogivehissoultothedevilin

exchangeforanoverinflatedcompanythatlikelywon’tlastadecadebeingrunthewaythosetwodo

things.”

“Idon’tknowwhattosay,Merritt.”I’matalossforwords,completelytakenbysurprise.I’ve

knownAriforyears;he’slikeabrothertome.“DoesWillowknow?”

“Nooneknows,baby,butus.”

“Don’tcallmethat.”

“Why?”hescoffslikeI’vecompletelyoffendedhim.

“BecauseIcan’tgetmyhopesup;I’mbarelyabletofunctionasitis.”

“Quinn,didyouordidn’tyouwritethisonthispaper?”HeholdsupwhatIwrote.

“Youwatchedmewriteit.”

“Didyouordidn’tyouknowCharleswasmyfather?”

“IsweartoGod,Ihadnoidea.”

“Thenplease,let’sgetbacktowherewewere.”

“ButIliedtoyou.”

“Because you played into them. They put you in the worst spot imaginable. I’ve lost almost

everything,Quinn;Iwillnotloseyoutoo.Doyouunderstandme?”

Inod,holdingbackthetearsthebestthatIcan,andhestands,“Getup.”

IlistenrightawaylikeIalwaysdo.Hestepstome,andIwaitasifthisisalladreamthatsoonI

will wake from. But as he places his palms against my face, I have found my place again. “Quinn

Whitmore,Iloveyou,morethananythinginthisentireworld.”

His lips find mine before I can speak the words back to him. He tastes like heaven, igniting

everything inside of me, bringing me back to life. The gaping hole I’ve lived with slowly closes. I

lovehim,Ilovehimtoo,morethananything.

Chapter44

Merritt

“Aretheyclosed?”Quinnasksmewithhertinyhandaroundmineasshewalksmedownanunsteady

surface.

“Yes,Ipromise.”

“Youbetternotbelying.”

“I’mnot.”

Westop,andshesays,“Stepupagain.”Ilistentohervoice,notknowingwherewearegoing,

but knowing that I’d follow her into the depths of hell if she wanted. For Christ’s sake, we’ve been

thereandbackandsurvived,sothere’snotmuchthatcouldbringusdownnow.

“Okay,open‘em!”

“Surprise!”asmallintimategroupofourclosestfriendscheers.

“Happybirthday,baby,”Quinnsays,stillholdingmyhandandIkissher.It’smybirthdayandas

much as I wasn’t looking forward to it, seeing as what I’ve gone through lately, she still made it a

greatcelebration.

“Whoseboatisthis?”Iaskher,andshesays,“Myboss,”whocomesupandshakesmyhand.

“Happybirthday,Merritt,it’sgreattoseeyouagain.”

ImethimthedayQuinnandIgotbacktogether.LookingaroundInoticeKamiandJacoband

Willow and Ted. “Happy birthday,” Willow says, hugging me, a glimmer of pain still in her eye

becauseofwhatAridid.Shefeelsbad,butit’snotherfault.Hell,it’snoone’sfault,buttheirown,and

theygotwhatwascomingtothem.AfterIthoughtlongandhardaboutdevisingaplanofpayback,I

soldmystockstoExlon,becauseCharleshadweaseledoutoftheleasedealImadewiththem.OnceI

foundouthegiftedthemsomestocksasacopout,Iknewitwasmyonlywaytogetbackathim.He

hadnoideaI’dgotothem;hewasblindsided…alotlikeIwas.

ButafterwhatIwentthrough,IwasonestepaheadofCharles.Forthefirsttimeinmylife,Ihad

oneuponhim.Withmystocks,Ari’soldonesIbought,andtheoneshe’dgivenExlon,theyhada

fifty-onepercentownershipinCharles’company.

WhenExlonsenttheirteamin,seeminglytojoininasapartnership,itdidn’ttakethemlongto

uncovertheyearsofdeceptionCharleshadskillfullyconducted.Immediatelytheykickedhimtothe

curb, indicting him for embezzlement. I knew Charles had always skewed the books, I just never

thoughtIcoulduseitagainsthim.

For Ari, he made his own bed with Azures. They handled him the same way my father was

handled.Theyreallyaretwopeasinapod.Maybeoneday,they’llbetwopeasinthesameprisoncell.

“Yougood?”Quinnasksme,handingmeaglassofchampagne.Comingbackintothemoment,

IpulloutofthedazedandcloudedmindfuckIfindmyselfgettingeasilylostin.

“Neverbetter,baby.Neverbetter.”

Lettingherleadmearoundtheboataswesailoffintothenight,wevisitwithallofourfriends

andfamily.AllofwhomshehasarrangedtobehereinDenver.Ihaven’tbeenbacktoTexassince

QuinnandIgotbacktogether,andIdon’tseemyselfevergoingback.MyphoneringsandIpullit

outofmypocket.

“Hello?”Ianswer.

“Merritt,it’sJohn.”

“Ohhey,John.Howarethegirlsdoing?”

“They’reallright.I’malittleworriedaboutTink—thevetcameforavisittoday,andshehas

desmitisinherfrontleftleg.”

“Really?How’dthathappen?”

“Shemust’vebeenoverworkingit.”

“Howcanitbefixed?”

“She’ll need to take it easy for a while; we won’t be able to bring her to Colorado like we’d

planned,notatleastuntilshe’sbetter.Butwithsometimeandmedicine,sheshouldbegood.”

“Iunderstand,thankyouforlettingmeknow.”

Ihangupwithhim,andQuinnisconcerned,“Whatdidhesay?”

Ifillherin,andIcanseetheworryonherface.“Wecangobackthereandlookforaplacein

Texas.”

“No, I don’t want to be away from you, and your job is here. She’ll be good.” She’s got an

angelinmymomwatchingoutforher.

“Thankyouforthis,baby,”Itellher,lookingaroundatallthepeopleclosesttous.Shesmiles

looking up at me with her big dark blue eyes, and I hold the side of her face, leaning down and

kissingher.Herlipsaresosoft,remindingmeofthefirsttimeweeverkissed,ontheskislope,and

still to this day, that same spark lives inside me. Who knew a week unplugged from the world, that

wasasetuptoruinusboth,couldturnouttobethegreatestthingthat’severhappened?

Epilogue

Merritt

1yearlater

“Areyoudoneyetinthere,mysexywife?”IyelltoQuinnassheisfinishingupthelastofherwork.

Sincewegotmarried,shelikesitwhenIcallhermywife.

“I just finished,” she struts outside so gorgeous, all sexy, and sits on my lap. “How’s my

husband?”

“Betternow,”Iholdherwarmbody,closetomine.Weareonthefrontporchofourhomein

theRockyMountainsofColorado,andthistimeofyeartheweatherisgorgeous.BellandTinkgraze

onthefiftyacresoflandthatweown,andsincewemovedthemhere,theyareinheaven.Tink’sleg

hasbeengreat,theybothseeminbetterhealth.Icredittheelevation.

“Youknow,weprobablydon’tevenneedtobuyhayanymore,”Itellheraswewatchthemeat,

andshesaystome,“Youarenotabouttostarvemygirls.”

“Theyarefarfromstarved,howdoyouthinktheyliveinthewild?Youthinksomesexylittle

ladyhandfeedsthemcarrotsandhayeverydayoutthere.”

“Idon’tcareaboutthewild,that’showIdothingshere,inourhouse,andourlife,andweare

goingtokeepfeedingthemhay.”

“Jesus,itwasjustanoption.”

Shegrinsandcupsthesideofmyface,stilllookingoutattheviewassherubsmeandIaskher.

“Workgood?”

“Itwas.”

“Yougetanythingdonetoday?”

“Nope.”

Afterweagreedtomoveupheretogether,shedidn’twanttoleaveherjob,sotheyareallowing

hertoworkoutofthehouseafewdaysaweek,whichkeepsherbusy.I’dratherherdonothing,butI

getthatshewantstowork.I,however,amdone.Iwillneverworkanotherdayinmylife.Ihavemore

thanenoughmoneytotakecareofusforever.

“What’sfordinner?”sheasksmeastheovendingsaswewanderinside.Ialwayscookforher,

andshelovesit.

“Spinachlasagna,”Itellher,takingoutthehotheapingpanofit.

“Smellsgood.”Iserveusbothplatesasshepoursuswineandthenshesaystome,“Youknow,

onceI’mpregnant,I’mgonnamisswine.”

“Thedoctorsaidyoucanhaveaglasseveryonceinawhile.”

“Isitsafe,though?”

“I’msureitis,orhewouldn’thavesaidthat.”

Sittingdowntoeat,hereyesareonmine,andIcan’tbelievethisiswhatmylifehasbecome.

Fromhavingacrazyobsessivedrivetoownmyowncompany,tonowbeingcontentwiththelittle

thingsinlife.It’sacompleteone-eighty,andIcouldn’tbehappier.

“DidItellyouthatStanofferedtosplittheseasonticketstotheNuggetsgamesnextseason?”

“Really?Wait‘tilItellTed.”

“Noway,”shescoffsatme.

“Comeon;thatwasaone-timething.”ThelasttimeTedandIwenttoagametogether,wegota

littledrunkandcrazyand…youcanguesstherest.

“Itbetterhavebeen,becausenexttimeI’mnotbailingyourassoutofjail.”

“Peeinginpublicreallyshouldn’tbeillegal,I’mjustsaying.”ShehitsmeonthearmasIpull

herontomylap.Herfaceissohappyintheeveninglight.Ilovetoseehersmile;it’swhatIworkfor

everyday.

Reachingdown,Icuphersex.Hergringetsbigger,andIcan’twaitanylonger.Liftingherup,I

take her into our bedroom, tossing her down on the plush fabric of our comforter. She giggles, a

soundIdependgreatlyupon.

“Getyourhat,”shetellsmeasIpullmyshirtoffovermyhead.

“Doyouhaveafetishforcowboys?”IaskherinmybestSouthernaccent.

“Yes,tattooedcowboys,”shetellsmeandstripsnaked,lyingtheresowillingandready.“ThenI

bettergrabmywhip.”

Takingitfromtheclosetalongwithmyhat,Ifindherkneeling,pantingformydick.“Youmiss

me?”Iaskherandstrokemyself.

“Uhhuh.”

“Youwannasuckmycockclean?”

“Yes,sir.”

“IfIletyousuckme,areyougonnamakemecome?”

Shestopsmefromplayinganddivesin.Wrappingthosetight,tightlipsaroundme.Igrunt,as

loudasIwant,pummelinghermouth.Takingthewhip,Itrailitoverherskin,lovinghowitpricks

beneaththetipoftheleather.

Pullingback,Ilandahardsmackonherass.Shemoansandsucksmefaster.“Touchyourself,”

Itellher,lookingtothesideasshekneelsthereandplayswithherpussy,lettingmefuckhermouth

sogood.

Ihitheragain,andshewhimpersformore.Sherubsherpussyfaster,pushingmesocloseto

theedge,butIholdon,notgivingovertoheryet.

Pulling out of her mouth, she kneels panting for me, and I place the handle of my whip in

betweenherteeth.“Youknowwhathappensifyoudropthis,right?”

She nods and I spread open her ass and pussy, so tempted to go right where I’ll end up, but

waitingbecausewehaveapurpose.

Slidinginsideofhertightwetslit,myballsswell,sohornyforherbentoverlikethis.Ineedto

blow.Theruleis,shedropsthewhipandIfuckherass.WhichwillhappenassoonasIcome,because

herasshasbecomebothofourfavorites.Shecancomeagainandagainfrommefuckingit,butwe

aretryingtohaveababy,andthatmeansshe’sgottaletmecomeinherpussyfirst.

Fuckingherhard,shewhimpersfromthefullness,andIrubherclit.Shearchesupwards,her

backagainstmychestasshecoaxesmeonthroughgrittedteeth.“Yes,fuckmeharder.”

“Oh,youlikeitrough.”

Ibarrelfasterandfaster,knowingthiscouldbeit.Thiscouldbethemomentwecreateachild,

andIholdherclose,knowingifitis,Iwillnotmakethesamemistakesthathavehappenedinmylife

with our kid. Cum shoots inside of her, and she screams, dropping the whip. I latch onto her neck,

lovingherandthesetimeswesharetogethermorethananythingelseinmylife.Isuckhardonthe

soft skin, teasing and biting her, knowing no one will see us for weeks. Up here we are unplugged

fromtheworld,alone,justthetwoofusinourownoasis.Aplacewe’vebuiltandcherished,aplace

whereI’vefalleninlovewithheralloveragain,andIhopethatinninemonths,itwillbethethreeof

us.

Acknowledgements

ThisbookisonlyarealitybecauseofsomanypeoplethatI’mnotsurehowtoproperlythank.So,

I’mgonnadomybesttotry.

William,yourundyingencouragementandvisionaroundthesestoriesmeanstheworldtome.

Thankyouforbeingthegreatest,husband,partner,andco-workeragirlcouldaskfor.Iloveyouto

themoonandback,baby.

To my grammatical team: Lisa, my amazing editor; Letica, Janice, and Denise, my fabulous

proofreaders,thatsavedmyassintheendonthisone;andmynewfoundBetaTeam.Youallhelpedto

moldandcreatethisstoryintoaworkofperfection.Thankyouforbelievinginme.

Last,butabsolutelynotleast:thereaders,reviewers,bloggers,andmyARCteam.Ihopeyouall

lovedQuinnandMerritt’sstoryjustasmuchasIadoredcreatingit.WhatIdoisforeachandevery

oneofyou—

thankyousovery,verymuchforyoursupport.

IfyoulovedUNPLUGGED,pleaseconsiderleavingareviewonAmazon—

www.amazon.com/author/lkcollins

, it’s the best way to give back to the author. I read every single

review.

Formore,visitmywebsite

www.authorlkcollins.com

.Andifyoujustcan’tgetenough,follow

meheretoo:

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Document Outline

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Epilogue

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