jokes


What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?

A stick.

Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?

Because he had no body to go with.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 8 9.

Where do you find a dog with two legs?

Where you left it.

How do you get four elephants into a car?

Two in the front and two in the back.

Why do birds fly south in the winter?

Because it is too far to walk.

In a shop: “Do you have crocodile shoes?

Yes sir. What size (number) does your crocodile wear?

Why do pandas like old films?

Because they are black and white.

Why was the mathematics book unhappy?

Because it had so many problems!

“Hey man! Please call me a taxi.”

“Yes sir. You are a taxi.”

“Is it difficult for you to make decisions?”

“Well, … yes and no.

“Waiter, waiter! There's a frog in my soup!”

“Sorry sir. The fly is on holiday!”

Why did the man throw his watch out of the window?

He wanted to see time fly.

What flower has got two lips?

Tulips.

What is black when it is dirty and white when it's clean?

A blackboard.

What does the traffic light say to the car?

Don't look now. I'm changing.

What is worse than finding a worm in an apple?

Finding half a worm.

What is the end of everything?

The letter “g”.

What word of only three syllables contains twenty-six letters?

Alphabet.

What did God say after creating man?

I can do better.

Mary's father has five daughters: Nana, Nene, Nini, Nono. What's the name of the fifth daughter?

It's Mary.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to buy a new bed.

What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.

“Waiter, why is there a fly in my soup?

It looks like he is learning to fly.



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