O sztuce interpretacji/rozumienia tekstu

Teksty krążące w jednym z akademików
Uniwersytetu w Odense (Dania)

YOU KNOW YOU'RE POLISH
IF...

You have relatives who

aren't really your

relatives

You sing

the sam

e song -

"100 lat

" - on e

very

occasion

wedding

s,

birthday

s, baby

showers

You know very well Pope John
Paul II was Polish and his
name
was Karol, not Carol

You go

to Mi

dnight

Mass

every

Christ

mas Ev

e and

keep y

our

Christ

mastre

e up t

ill

Februa

ry

You drink your wodka straight

You don't feel the need to
add an "s" to Pierogi because
you already
know the word is plural and
it annoys you when others
do. However, you still add
'y' to already plural english
words...
"chipsy", "dzinsy"

You are convinced your pets
only understand Polish

You are forced to listen to
Disco Polo by your parents

The thought of eating cow
stomach (flaki) doesn't gross
you out

When you're at a stranger's
house, you expect their
garbage can to
be under the sink

Ever

y wi

ndow

in

your

hous

e mu

st h

ave

"fir

anki

", e

ven

in t

he

bath

room

You always take off your
shoes as soon as you step
into someone
else's house

You were extremely surprised
to learn that American
weddings last
hours, not days

At every party that you
attend ppl tell dowcipy and
there is a
disscusion about politics

You kn

ow how

to

"kombi

nowac"

when your parents have no
idea how to use a computer
except for
solitaire.

when your family considers
mushroom picking as 'having a
good time"

You thought that your Uncle's
name was 'Szwagier' until you
turned 12.

Your were beaten at least
once with a wooden spoon,
belt, broom, or
all of the above

You couldn't say a bad word,
even stupid, around your
mother without
getting smacked

Sometime in your life when
you were sick you had one of
these 2
remedies: hot milk with
butter and garlic (mleko z
czostkem) or syrop z czebulie
(onions with sugar)

your dad doesn't care what you
do or what time you're home, as
long
as your mom said it was okay. if
your dad calls you
and proceeds to yell at you to
come home, you only need to say
"ale>mama
wie gdzie jestem i powiedziala
ze moge zostac
jeszcze dwie godziny..." and he
promptly replies "oh. okay. have
fun
then," and hangs up

.

You m

ight

know

you a

re po

lish

when

you g

et st

opped

by p

olice

and i

nstea

d

of hi

m han

ding

you t

he ti

cket,

you h

and h

im mo

ney

Your dad ever butchered a pig
or lamb

you ar

e surp

rised

to fin

d

that t

he toi

lets i

n the

pub/re

staura

nt/sho

p are

free

of cha

rge

You hav

e kielb

asa han

ging

somewhe

re in y

our kit

chen