Patchwork ~ Section I

By Dolores

Section I, Next Section

Part I

Posted on Thursday, 6 June 2002

"Hello. Yes, that's right I'm available. I can start within the week. No, my company closed, notice isn't necessary."

Elizabeth looked around the apartment at all the stuff she had to pack within a week. Mother used to get boxes at the grocery store but that was so cheap and of course there was the danger of bugs. Her old boss had introduced her to the private fears and thrills of being a neat freak. Cockroaches had been high on her hit list of coffee break topics. Where does one find boxes? She thought. It had been three years since she had moved back to her parents house after college and boxes had not factored in anywhere into that move. She almost laughed out loud thinking of her burly father balancing her pink lamp in one hand, a duffel in the other all the while heaving the old second hand fridge strapped to his back. I guess I can't show up to Mr. Ceo's mansion carrying all my belongings one at a time.

"Yes I'll be there at 9. I can do light cooking but occasionally I'll need the weekend off. Does Mr. Darcy understand that I have only made the commitment for one year, he does, very good then. Yes, goodbye."

As soon as Elizabeth hung up with the agency she rang her sister Jane.

"Jane it's all settled. I start on Sunday. No Jane I'll be fine. The woman at the agency assured me my room was very nice and the workload would be basically just upkeep, evidently Mr. Darcy is a workaholic and is home very little."

" At least let me help you move your things? Is it very creepy in the house with all the furniture gone?"

"Well it's not what you call incredibly cheery but I have been trying not to look around to much. Now that the pictures have been taken down the nights have been a little easier." Elizabeth offered more than usual but she was feeling overwhelmed and needed to rest her head on Jane, even if it was just over the phone.

"Oh Lizzy I'm sorry all this has fallen to you. You have done such a good job with everything. I think I'll come up late Friday instead of Saturday, I could swap shifts with Suzy, she owes me. I dated her younger brother last weekend."

"Oh no, was it that bad", Lizzy laughed with tears in her eyes.

" Let's just say in the world of nursing a blind date to a Star Trek convention is equivalent to covering two of your weekend shifts."

"Sounds great. I'll see you then" Lizzy wanted to laugh but thinking of Jane not arriving for another 4 days was more than she could bear. She hurried off so Jane wouldn't worry.

"Yes Mrs. Young I expect discreet behavior, neatness and punctuality. If I don't see all of this the first week I'll have to make other arrangements." Darcy hung up the phone feeling uneasy about hiring a new housekeeper. It wasn't right, Reynolds had always taken care of everything.

He sat back in his chair and looked out the window towards the pond. Reynolds had always been old, at least she always seemed old to him but never frail. He thought of the winter she had taught him how to ice skate. All the other boys were playing hockey and he couldn't even stand up on his blades. She saw the disappointment when his father had rebuked him for making to many demands on his time. Reynolds took him out to the pond, opened a very ancient looking shoe box and produced a pair of well worn skates. She plopped down and started to lace up. She urged him, "William don't dilly-dally I have a dinner to put out yet and the sun is going down." She stayed out with him until he could skate the length of the pond without falling. He was positive that there was no one available with these credentials at "Young's Best Maids"

Sunday had come so quickly Elizabeth hadn't had time to settle herself on what the proper behaviour a maid should exhibit. She'd have to wing it and hope her new employer wasn't displeased. She knew she would have to squelch her temper, after all this was to be her livelihood for at least a year.

"Lizzy I think we turn down this road here." Jane read from the map and the handwritten directions. "Funny though this road isn't shown on the map."

"Jane I have a sinking feeling this is not a road but a driveway." Lizzy gaped.

"Elizabeth did you realize it would be this grand?" Jane asked in a worried tone.

"No not at all," Lizzy trembled with the thought of taking care of a house this size.

The sisters pulled up to a side door, thinking it might be more appropriate than using the front entrance. Elizabeth steadied herself, grasping the wheel very tightly. She cut the motor and looked at Jane. Their eyes locked and Jane stirred to offer an alternate solution. Lizzy stopped her with a wave. She left the car and walked to the house. Before she could knock an old woman answered the door.

"Dear, you must be Elizabeth. Did you find your way? We are quite secluded here. I'm Mrs. Reynolds"

"Mrs. Reynolds I think there is a mistake I had no idea Mr. Darcy's house was, was, was so...."

"Beautiful, isn't it though Miss. Don't worry about the size, half the house isn't used. We keep it closed off. Your duties will include Mr. Darcy's rooms, his office, the library, the parlor, the kitchen and the bathrooms." On conclusion Mrs. Reynolds laughed warmly, "My I have been busy here over the years."

Elizabeth smiled widely. She liked Mrs. Reynolds already. Perhaps this wouldn't be to daunting. "I'll just get my things. If it's all right my sister has come along to help me settle in?" Mrs. Reynolds smiled approvingly.

When they came in she showed them up to her room. It was on the second floor down a long hallway. The room was small, but the windows were pretty. There was a bed in the far corner and a door that led to a small bathroom. Everything seemed clean but stark. Jane anticipated Lizzy's impression of the room. "With some of your beautiful quilts it will look very homey." Jane and Lizzy squeezed hands.

"Miss Elizabeth you settle yourself in this afternoon then come down to the kitchen and we'll discuss your duties over supper."

"Thank you Mrs. Reynolds"

"Lizzy I must be going too. Will you be all right?" Lizzy nodded reassuringly." Call me as soon as you can."

Elizabeth saw Jane out and collected her last box full of clothes. She waved goodbye as Jane drove her car away. It would have to be sold but Jane assured her she would come up when they both had a weekend off to buy her something smaller. She was stranded here, at least for a while.

Supper with Mrs. Reynolds consisted of chicken with rice and a very long list of chores that had to be accomplished every week.

"Cooking will be done by Mrs. Brown but occasionally she takes a weekend off and you will be asked to prepare light meals. Can you cook dear?"

"Oh yes, that won't be any problem"

"Mr. Darcy will be back sometime tomorrow and I will be leaving in the morning."

"You're leaving?" Lizzy looked to the old woman for an answer but she said nothing, she only shook her head and smiled but Lizzy thought she saw tears coming to her eyes. She looked away so as not to embarrass her.

Once everything was unpacked she sat on her bed feeling restless and fearful, her quilting things still packed, she remembered a library being mentioned, perhaps she could borrow a book, just for tonight. She slipped on her sweatpants and sweater and made her way downstairs. The hallway was chilly even for September and she hesitated, thinking it was undignified to walk barefoot as a maid. She would put that on her mental list of appropriate behaviors for maids but right now she just wanted to get this over with. The house was inky dark and she had to feel her way down the stairs. Miraculously she found the library off the foyer. The floor was ice cold and she put an asterisk next to her entry on slipper wearing in mansions. She turned a small light on at the desk and started combing the shelves for titles. She chose a volume of plays by Tennessee Williams and went to the window for moonlight. She flipped to the contents searching the titles.

He saw the silhouette in front of the window as soon as he opened the door. He was tired and hungry and his impatience got the better of him. "Who's there, what are you doing there?"

Elizabeth had closed the book upon his entrance and had turned full face to her new employer.

"Oh, please excuse me sir, I am Elizabeth Bennet. I am the new housekeeper." Darcy had turned on a light and looked at her. Where were her shoes he thought. This is going to be trouble. I must set the right tone now.

"The library is not for the servants to use Miss Bennet and I would appreciate conservative dress while you are on duty as well as off." There that should do it. He turned his back as she began to speak.

Elizabeth's face was flushed with embarrassment. She was ready to retort but checked herself. She swallowed hard and simply said. "Yes of course, please excuse me I'm sure you're tired from your day." She scurried for the door and opened it noiselessly. Darcy had turned round with only time to see her barefoot and hand exiting lightly.

Morning burst into Elizabeth's tiny room in an unfriendly manner. She jumped up quickly to dress, worried about her to do list and still stinging inside over her bad start with Mr. Darcy. After discarding her first two outfits as not 'conservative' enough, something caught her side view out the front window. It was Darcy, standing in front of a cab, waiting. A few moments later Mrs. Reynolds appeared walking towards him, carrying her bags. Darcy, almost running, grabbed her bags and followed her. He placed the bags in the trunk and came around to where she was standing, he dropped his head while Mrs. Reynolds said a few words and placed a hand on his arm, at which point he looked up and shook his head back and forth. What could be going on, Elizabeth wondered, just then she saw the envelope emerge from his right hand pocket, he lifted it and handed it to her. Elizabeth thought perhaps she would refuse, after his behaviour last night she was almost rooting for that outcome, but she didn't. In fact, she accepted the envelope with a look of love and gratitude. It just didn't add up, doesn't this lovely, seemingly wise woman see what a lout this Mr. Darcy was, how could she have gratitude and love towards a person that was turning her out, no doubt because she was to old, or had made a little mistake like borrowed one to many library books. The last and most confounded thing, to Elizabeth, came at the end when Darcy stooped down to hug the old woman. All right Elizabeth reassessed, perhaps she had been with them a long time and maybe she was leaving on better terms than perceived but it was the tenderness of the hug. His hands came up around the little woman gently and for just a split second she caught him nuzzling his head into the crook between her neck and shoulder. It sent a pang through Elizabeth, a pang that every woman without children feels, will it ever happen to me, will someone ever love me so much.

Dusting and watering would be her first chores, thinking that Darcy would be leaving for the office after seeing Mrs. Reynolds off, Elizabeth chose his office to begin, it was set back from the main entrance and she thought maybe she could avoid him entirely for the day. No sooner had she started dusting the window shelves, carefully moving the knickknacks as she went, when she heard the door open.

"Not here, not now."

Elizabeth stopped and turned to look at him but he was already seated at his desk with his head behind the computer screen. Elizabeth replaced the plants and left the room. Oh this is not going well at all. She felt so sad and out of place in this house. What was she doing here. It wasn't that she wanted to be friends with him but he was so curt and thoughtless in his demeanor. She feared it was going to be a horror working here for a year, if she made it that long.

I should talk with that new one but not now. Darcy felt terrible he couldn't have a conversation with some girl about how she was going to do all the things that Reynold's should be doing. Why did she have to be so old now, a nursing home was not the right place for her, she should be here with me. Of course they said he'd visit but they both knew it wouldn't be often. It was truly good-bye. He ran his hands through his hair, his eyes watered and he banged the table hard. "Damn!" he pushed away from the desk and headed for the outdoors. On his way out he almost ran into Elizabeth watering the enormous flower arrangement in the foyer. He couldn't look back, he would deal with new problems later. Once outside he ran towards the stable and saddled Havana. He rode out with a vengeance.

Elizabeth worked through her list diligently, only avoiding the office, by 5 p.m. she heard footsteps coming in the kitchen back door. Her stomach tightened, now almost fearful of Mr. Darcy, for she had heard him curse before storming out this morning. Happily it was only Mrs. Brown, the cook Mrs. Reynolds had told her about, she popped her head into the parlor where Elizabeth was washing the windows, "Hello there"

"Hi, I'm Elizabeth Bennet from the housekeeping agency." Lizzy extended her hand warmly, hoping this would be an ally.

"My you're pretty", the woman smiled as she took a long look at Elizabeth. "Have you met Mr. Darcy yet?"

"Yes", Elizabeth tried not to show her reluctance but women have a way of picking up on first impressions.

"Ah, bit of a hard day for the poor boy I suppose. I'll make something special. Now what about you dear? Cup a tea? Looks like you've been at it all day. Let me guess, Mrs. Reynolds left a very detailed list." She laughed and shook her head. "One of the last great ones. You know she came with the Darcys from England, trained in the great British mansions." Mrs. Brown giggled like a girl and cocked her head. "Don't let the list scare you, she just loved them so much, she wants everything to be right, even more so now that she won't be here anymore."

Mrs. Brown's warm manner made Lizzy a little less skittish but she wasn't any less confused about the temperament of her employer. She followed her into the kitchen, thankful for a break and happy to have someone to talk with. She missed her mother so much at times like these, when she was unsure what to think, not wanting to make a poor judgment.

While the two women were talking about where they were from they heard the front door slam. Lizzy noticed Mrs. Brown look out towards the foyer, although she couldn't see it, and purse her lips and shake her head in a kind of, that's a shame, way. Lizzy studied her actions for some clue to what was going on.

"I can hear Mr. Darcy has retired to bed early so I think I'll wrap everything and put it into the fridge. I can't stay but will you reheat things if you hear Mr. Darcy come down later?"

Elizabeth cringed inside but outwardly smiled and agreed, wanting to be amiable and helpful to her new workmate.

Mrs. Brown left, with the promise of going over Elizabeth's list tomorrow, amending some of the chores. Lizzy ate some soup she had made, and then cleared the dishes. There had been no sign of Darcy and it was 8 O'clock. She decided her responsibilities were over and went upstairs to bed. She just removed her sweater and shoes when she heard him descending the stairs. Her head went back and her eyes closed. "Oh what should I do?" She quickly fetched her sweater and put her shoes back on. She reached the kitchen expecting to see him staring into the fridge but instead no one was there. She quickly took out the soup, chicken and bread and set it to warming. Just as everything was set out on the kitchen table a panic came over Lizzy. Oh no she thought, he doesn't eat in the kitchen like a servant. She went to the table about to gather everything to quickly set up in the dining room, thinking how pathetic he was going to look sitting there all alone, when he came in the door. The chicken and bread fell to the floor with a resounding clatter. Darcy stood there staring at her, no reaction, no sympathy, without instinct to bend down. Elizabeth could stand no more. This was so weird. It started as a quiet giggle and then she couldn't stop, she was full out laughing while she was bending over to pick things up.

"Mr. Darcy please excuse me but your entrances and exits seemed to find me in the most compromising situations." Her laughter was more sweet than mocking and was a relief from all the tension she was feeling.

Darcy looked down on her and was prepared to fire out another lecture on impropriety but changed his mind. "I see you have your shoes on this evening Miss Bennet and I suppose for today I can't ask for more than that. In the future I will eat in the dining room and not on the kitchen floor." He disappeared behind the door. Elizabeth ladled out some soup and buttered some bread. She set it on a tray and brought it out to the dining table. He was seated, alone, waiting and the image softened her urge to dump the soup in his lap. She set out the meal.

"I am sorry about the chicken..........sir," Lizzy choked on the 'sir' but she wanted to test out what she was to call him. He hadn't flinched over the 'sir' so she assumed it was acceptable. She went back into the kitchen and cleaned up the mess. She heard him moving his chair away from the table and she went back out.

"Sir"

"He turned at the door leading out of the dining room, with an impatient tone he said, "Yes, Miss Bennet"

"Sir, I managed to save your pudding?" Elizabeth smiled, feeling triumphant that she knew he loved such a childish dessert.

"Mrs. Brown made it?" he inquired, amazingly, with a straight face.

"Yes", she said. "She thought you might like something special today?' Lizzy said, half questioning half stating fact.

"All right." He sat back down, again waiting patiently.

Elizabeth brought out the pudding and placed it before him. She thought she detected a chuckle when he looked at it but she left quickly, happy that they had had a normal exchange.

Elizabeth's second week was much more quiet than her first. She barely saw Mr. Darcy which also meant she had not had any altercations either. Mrs. Brown was very helpful with directing her in the housekeeping and she even had some spare time to fix up her room a bit.

On Friday morning the phone rang in the office while she was cleaning.

"Hello...uh..... uh...oh Darcy residence." It was the first time she answered the phone in her new position.

"Yes I'm glad you can remember where you work Miss Bennet. Is Mrs. Brown in?" Mr. Darcy's voice was terse.

"No sir, she has stepped out." Elizabeth cringed over the way she answered the phone.

"Oh.....I'm having a dinner party tomorrow night and a guest of mine is very partial to apple tart. Tell Mrs. Brown to have it ready for Saturday....Can you do that?" His tone was skeptical.

"Yes of course Mr. Darcy, good-bye" Elizabeth put the receiver down feeling awful. Why does he assume I'm so inept. Not that I really care besides it was only a few little mistakes....barefeet, chicken on the floor....oh well." Lizzy giggled.

Mrs. Brown was upset by the short notice call for her apple tart. She explained to Elizabeth it was impossible for her to make and for that matter she wouldn't be here for the weekend. It seemed her husband had bought some tickets for a cruise. She had told Mr. Darcy about it months ago.

"Oh Elizabeth what will I do? I can't disappoint my husband but I can't leave Mr. Darcy stranded either?" Mrs. Brown was in tears.

"Now that's is quite enough. I am here and will cook and do whatever else needs to be done. You and Mr. Darcy must begin trusting me." Elizabeth put her hand on Mrs. Brown's shoulder with a strength that conveyed all would turn out fine.

As soon as she saw Mrs. Brown out with all reassurances and wishes for a wonderful trip, she walked back to the kitchen to form her plans for the weekend. No sooner had she settled in her mind that with this opportunity she would single handedly turn her image from undependable housekeeper to indispensable cook and confidant, she realized there was no food in the fridge and she had no car to convey her to the market.

"Drat............I could take a cab" no cabs always made her feel jittery, funny smells and scary drivers.....no she would walk. It was no more than 2 miles to the market and she would be back in time to make supper and the apple tart for the weekend.

The walk there was wonderful, she got to see much of the Darcy estate, making her way down the winding path of driveway. The fall colors were golden and red. Her face tingled with the chill in the air and her mind felt clear. There had been so many dark days in the last two years. The sale of her own family home had numbed her mind. She couldn't dwell on any more sadness. She shook her head a little, thinking the token gesture would ensure the clearness to stay and the dark thoughts be sloughed off like dead skin.

After the food had been paid for and the bundles packed she realized her miscalculation. In her zeal to impress she forgot that whatever she bought would have to be carried the 2 miles back to the house. At the edge of town she had to stop and rest awhile, the plastic handles of the heaviest bag dug into her fingers. She set everything down and looked around. It was quiet for a Friday, assuming the traffic could not be far away. She checked her watch and saw that there was no time to, it was almost 4:45. Mr. Darcy would be home soon and she still hadn't started dinner. Elizabeth picked up the pace and was turning in the driveway when she heard a car pull in behind her. The window rolled down. It was Mr. Darcy with a friend.

"Miss Bennet what are you doing?" He frowned and looked at the three bags she was carrying.

"Coming home from the market, sir. Dinner won't be long. I already have some of it cooked." She lied, but it was small.

He shrugged his shoulders and put his head down. "Why isn't Mrs. Brown preparing the meal?"

"I gave her your message but she said you forgot about her vacation weekend. I told her it was all right and sent her home, with the promise that I would cover for her." The strain of the bundles was starting to diminish even Elizabeth's smile.

"Oh you did?"

Just then a person and voice emerged from the other side of the vehicle, "Where I come from we don't let ladies stand with heavy bags. Darcy pop the trunk."

A fair-haired man, stepped easily towards Elizabeth.

"Miss Bennet I believe? I'm Mr. Darcy's good friend Charles Bingley. I'm sure filling Reynolds shoes has been a complete nightmare. Here let's put these in the trunk."

By the time Mr. Bingley closed the door Elizabeth noticed that the back door had been pulled open on the drivers side but no one was there. She knew it must have been Mr. Darcy. Without commenting she slipped in the back seat and looked down to avoid eye contact. They were at the kitchen entrance within seconds. The car stopped and Elizabeth could hear the trunk pop open. Before anyone could say a word she flew out of the car, snatched the bundles, slammed the trunk shut and waved thank you and ran in the kitchen chilled with anger.

"He is so impossible. I know now it is not just me but his friends see his ineptitude also."

She quickly set to work on supper, choosing what she thought Mr. Bingley might enjoy. With the table set and dinner almost prepared she started on the apple tart. She wondered where the two had gone and was sliding the tart in the oven when they burst into the kitchen.

"Darcy I tell you it looks worse than it is! I'm sure I don't need stitches. Here ....here is Miss Bennet. I'm sure she can patch me up quickly." Mr. Bingley looked pleadingly at Elizabeth.

"Charles I saw you fall off Havana and I'm not altogether sure that gash is the only thing wrong. You could easily have sprained your wrist as well."

While they were arguing Elizabeth had quickly gathered some first aid and set it out on the table.

"Even if you do decide to go to the hospital I think it would be a good idea to stop the bleeding first." Lizzy guided Mr. Bingley to a chair at the table, she laid his arm out carefully on the cloth, noting how much discomfort it caused him. She began to wash the wound and quickly saw that it would probably not need stitches. All the while Mr. Darcy stood over her, looking grim.

She turned to him, and with as much confidence as she could muster she said, "I don't believe he'll need stitches sir, the wound is superficial. His mobility is fine too. I can patch him up now if you like."

Darcy held her gaze, searching her eyes for the right thing to do. He finally broke away and said, "Yes, I think that would be a good idea." He quickly turned to Charles, "Drink old chap?"

"Sounds like the medicine I need." Darcy disappeared to fetch the drinks and Elizabeth applied ointment and a large bandage to the wound. Just as she was finishing Darcy returned with the drinks.

"Shall we go to the library Charles?" Darcy motioned out of the kitchen.

"Actually Darcy I think I'd like to sit here for a few minutes, my head is spinning a bit, and something smells so wonderful that I think that I should like to sit here forever." Bingley sounded a bit odd.

Darcy shot a look at Elizabeth with raised eyebrows.

"I think perhaps Mr. Bingley should have a glass of juice and some of the apple tart that's coming out in a minute, before he enjoys his drink. He did lose some blood and a little snack will restore him." Elizabeth offered.

"Yes, I agree." Darcy nodded in agreement.

Elizabeth moved to the oven and pulled out the tart, she poured the juice and laid out two places. The two men ate and it was evident when they had finished that Mr. Bingley was feeling better. Elizabeth could see his color had come back and his eyes looked clear.

"Miss Bennet I must thank you for your excellent nursing." Mr. Bingley said warmly as he stood to leave.

"Remember sir, you must change that bandage twice a day and if you have any pain or continued bleeding you should follow up with your doctor. I will leave the bandages in this cabinet for you or I'll help if you need assistance."

The two men left the kitchen and headed toward the library. Elizabeth cleared the dishes and was getting ready to set the dining table for supper, before opening the door she stopped upon hearing the two men discussing something.

"Darcy I must tell you I didn't think you could replace Reynolds but you have outdone yourself. Besides wonderful cook and nurse she is also very pretty."

"Oh Bingley please she is just household help don't gush." Darcy replied tersely.

"No Darcy you won't make me feel bad for paying someone a compliment. She's lovely and I'll go one step further and say I think you should have thanked her. What she did in there was not necessary."

Elizabeth couldn't believe Mr. Bingley's audacity, part of her wanted to cheer for him but there was an uneasy feeling too, why must, what seems natural, be explained to a grown man, a man of sense and education, a man who has lived in the world. She felt wrong listening in on this very private argument.

"I am in no mood to give consequence to a servant. If she does her job and occasionally does something a little extra she will be compensated at the end of the year. Everyone today expects to be praised for the job they are getting paid for."

Elizabeth couldn't see but Bingley just shook his head, not so much out of frustration but concern. He had seen Darcy slipping away over the last few years into a dark place, a place that had little room for joy, patience or even friendship. The men moved on to the library, with Bingley muttering his dissenting opinion.

Enough of this man, I will not spend another minute contemplating his motivations. He is not worth the trouble. Lizzy straightened up and continued her dinner preparations.

Darcy rose early on Saturday, secure in Bingley's health, he was anxious to visit with his horse. Although Havana hadn't sustained any injury when Bingley fell he felt the horse may need reassurances.

The air was cold and a mist hung between the low branches of the trees. It was September already and this would be the last weekend he would see his sister, Georgiana, until the holidays. He hoped everything was going well. Once he saw her face, felt her presence in the house he would be able to tell if she was feeling better. He swatted at some bushes with his riding crop, while en route, meaning the lashes for himself. How could he have let her become involved with Wickham. He should have been more involved in her comings and goings. Things would be different now, she would be ensconced in the boarding school in Maine and only leave to come home for the holidays. His mind wandered back to his impression of the Gray academy, and he felt that Gray could not have been a more fitting name. The rooms were stark and he winced now at the thought of himself demanding a private room for his sister, knowing that almost all the girls shared a room, ensuring, he supposed, easy friendships. He laughed to himself quietly, easy friendships seemed to him two mutually exclusive ideas. Charles had even been acting up lately with demands he just didn't have time for. Yesterday, for instance he wondered, how can Charles expect me to worry about the feelings of my housekeeper? She is well paid, not abused in any way or seemingly unhappy in her position. Oh Bingley is probably attracted to her and feels the need to draw her into the conversation. He had never seen anything that exceptional in her looks......except that one night he had come home and first met her.......he couldn't remember all that transpired because the scene played itself out so quickly.......but there was the barefoot and hand closing the door. It was so gentle and light, the hand tapped the door to start it moving and then she slipped out, using only the movement of air her body created in walking, to secure it closed.

"Miss Bennet what are you doing in here?"

"Oh sir, I hope you don't mind" she resumed stroking Havanna. " It's just that....well my sister Jane used to ride and I remembered her telling me that when you fall off a horse, even if the animal is not injured they can become well....insecure for a time." She produced the carrots that were half hidden behind her back and raised them. "Is this okay."

Darcy was dumbstruck, who did this woman think she was...."Yes I suppose but let's not make this a habit. He walked away towards the shelves on the other side of the stable to retrieve his gloves when he saw the bags. They were from the grocer in the village and one was filled with apples.

Elizabeth finished feeding Havana and turned to leave, she felt that Mr. Darcy was not pleased with her interference and she stamped her foot as she walked, mad with herself for not coming before she had walked to the market.

"Miss Bennet." Mr. Darcy called out, "....you've forgotten your packages."

Elizabeth came back, bending down for her bags. "You may ask for a car to go to the market." Mr. Darcy said loudly.

Elizabeth looked up at him, his gloves in hand, resting up against a table. He looked very handsome, the dullness of the day contrasted with his dark features creating an outline around his shape. "Yes sir, but I forgot something I needed for your dinner party tonight and didn't want to disturb anyone so early."

Darcy looked at her for a moment then moved toward Havana. "Very well then.......thank you." He muttered with his back turned.

Part II

Posted on Saturday, 15 June 2002

Elizabeth cooked and cleaned throughout the day, expectantly listening for the weekend guests to arrive. Although he had not told her how many would be coming she felt confident it was intimate. Apple tart was not for business guests and that would have been catered. No, this was either family or very close friends. She had made up three bedrooms just in case.

Her second tart was finished by lunchtime and she hoped this one would not have to be used as first aid. She placed it on the table to cool and left the kitchen to cut some flowers for the guest bedrooms. Hoping she would find some late blooming mums, snapdragons or even a handful of impatiens, she walked close to the kitchen entrance, on the path of the driveway she saw an outcropping of colorful flowers. She strode along the drive thinking how the grounds might look in spring, wondering if there were any bulbs planted, perhaps by Pryce, the gardener or Mrs. Reynolds. She hoped for flowers, they had a way of making everything seem more bearable.

Once she had a nice mixture of earthy colored flowers she turned to head inside, before reaching the stoop she heard a car coming down the lane.

Georgiana Darcy squinted her eyes to see who was standing at the kitchen entrance. She was still upset with her brother for allowing Reynolds to leave before she could say a proper good bye. Surely, she would visit with her on the Christmas holiday but she regretted missing a last embrace in the kitchen.

As the car approached Georgiana could see Elizabeth a bit better. William is not pleased with her, I can tell, she is looking very nervous and intimidated, the down turn of the mouth the head tilted slightly to one side. Georgiana smiled wistfully, she looks like a little country bride standing at the door to a cabin, with her apron on and her wilting bouquet of mums.

"Hello, I'm Elizabeth Bennet, the new housekeeper." Elizabeth nervously introduced herself.

Georgiana sensed she was untrained, not agreeing with all the customs of wealth, but being intimately familiar she was quite sure this was an improper introduction. Never the less the young girl did what she was trained to do at her boarding schools, and handled the awkward situation with patience and grace. " It is very nice to meet you Miss Bennet I am Mr. Darcy's younger sister Georgiana. I'll be staying for the weekend before heading off for school."

Elizabeth had trouble guessing the girls age. She spoke well but there was unsteadiness about her speech that gave it a sense of being rehearsed.

"Well if you are heading off to school we had better feed you well this weekend." Elizabeth bent in a bit and smiled wryly, " I've heard the food is not very good at those places. Shall we get you settled in then." Elizabeth reached for Georgiana's bags with her free hand but before she could secure them the girl interrupted.

"Oh Miss Bennet it isn't necessary. I can find my way, besides I believe your flowers are wilting." Georgiana smiled and looked at them.

"Why yes I believe you're right." Elizabeth followed behind her but before the two could step halfway through the kitchen Mr. Darcy had come through the door.

"Georgiana," Darcy walked to his sister quickly, it seemed as though he might grab her and then lift her to his own height, but just as quickly as he approached he halted, catching himself.

"You're late. We were expecting you at noon." He grabbed her bags as he chided her gently.

"Yes well, I had to pack the rest of my things in boxes. I couldn't ask Pryce to load everything into the car so we made quite a few small trips."

"Well then I believe you made the right decision. We don't want Pryce leaving us as well." He put his arm around Georgiana and walked out of the kitchen.

Elizabeth mused over Mr. Darcy's words while placing the flowers in the guest bedrooms. She walked to the window in the last room and looked down towards the pond. She tried to imagine what the brother and sister looked like as children tramping about the estate, but her imagination was not up to the challenge. There was nothing in their manner that conveyed any trace of youthful joy. There was one moment when Mr. Darcy first saw his sister, a rush to his step.....

"Yes, you there by the window. My bags, I need help with my bags."

Lizzy turned to find a tall, elegantly dressed woman standing in the doorway looking very put out.

" Yes Ma'am I didn't see you there" Elizabeth stepped lively towards the woman.

" I believe you're the replacement for Reynolds?"

"Yes Ma'am, I believe I am"

" Well thank the lord. Perhaps now, William will bring this old place into the 21st century. I mean have you seen the kitchen, that table is laughable; it's right out of the 50's. And the curtains, well don't get me started on the window treatments.

Elizabeth brought the bags in from the hallway and placed them near the bureau.

"What do you say then....Oh, what is your name?"

"Miss Bennet."

"Yes, well Miss Bennet don't you agree? I mean William... ah Mr. Darcy has neglected the upkeep or should I say the modernization of this house."

Elizabeth knew what her answer should be but something inside her welled up, as if she were taking blows for Mrs. Reynolds and to defend her pride, she turned on this woman and with a cold calm stare uttered her response.

"When I first came to the Darcy estate the exterior frightened me, its grandness and intensity put me on guard, but when I entered the kitchen and saw the quaint furniture and original design I felt...well...let's say I knew there was common sense here."

"Caroline, we have been waiting for you. Darcy is getting impatient. He wanted to ride out an hour ago so that he could have enough time to visit with Georgiana before dinner." Mr. Bingley burst into the conversation with a pleading look.

The two women were distracted from their conversation but not before Elizabeth caught a look of disdain on Caroline's face. Mr. Bingley quickly realized that Elizabeth was also in the room and turned to address her.

"Miss Bennet, please forgive my rudeness. I didn't see you there at first. Allow me to introduce my sister, Caroline Bingley. I am sure I have interrupted instructions and plans, please forgive me."

"Not at all Mr. Bingley. Your sister has just arrived." Elizabeth laughed, smiling at Mr. Bingley's impeccable manners and thinking how his sister and friend could learn a great deal from him.

"Charles, go tell William that I'll be down in five minutes."

Charles turned to leave when Caroline ran after him. She stopped him in the hallway.

"Charles tell William that the housekeeper detained me for some of the time."

Elizabeth heard something about the'housekeeper' and moved closer to the door. She knew she shouldn't listen but her curiosity got the better of her.

"I'll do no such thing Caroline. Why would I even want to?" Bingley eyed her incredulously.

"You know that our relationship has been progressing and I don't want my being late to irritate him, especially on a wonderful weekend where we could have some time alone together."

"Ugh....I really don't like this." Charles looked down, disgusted with his sisters scheming. He raised his head and looked in her eyes, he could see that she genuinely liked Darcy and so relented, thinking it wouldn't cause to much harm.

Elizabeth was incensed. How could this woman abuse her, they had just met not two minutes ago. She stamped her foot in disgust, not wanting to be to near the door when Caroline reentered she crossed the room and very violently threw her bags on the bed, hoping that any breakables would indeed be broken.

Caroline breezed back in the room and walked to the closet to hang up her coat. Elizabeth eyed her, now with a different perspective. She was very tall, at least six inches taller than herself. She was very slim, no hips, her lithe figure was complimented by a pair of gray wool slacks cut to what Elizabeth thought was perfection, just skirting the ankle of her black boot. Her blouse was white, not cotton or silk but maybe a linen blend, the collar was unbuttoned down to reveal her collarbone that was adorned with just a thin cold chain. She was understated chic and Elizabeth was frustrated that she could not find an imperfection.

When Caroline got to the door she turned round before she left.

"I hope dinner won't be late this evening I am famished."

Elizabeth could only nod her head in acknowledgment, now feeling extremely self-conscious of her own appearance. She hurried down to the kitchen realizing it was going on 3 O'clock and she needed to put some finishing touches on the meal. While she was setting the table she couldn't stop imagining Mr. Darcy with Caroline Bingley. It didn't seem right to her, they would cancel each other out like negative numbers. She laughed out loud at this thought and was caught by surprise when she heard a voice behind her.

"I am very glad that you have time for amusement on such a busy weekend Miss Bennet. I trust with all this pleasure everything has been well prepared for our dinner guests this evening." Darcy couldn't help himself.

That was enough, he had pushed unfairly for the last time, she turned to face Mr. Darcy squarely and with an unwavering glare she said, "Yes sir, that is correct. Everything has been seen to, down to the smallest detail, including the dessert." Lizzy turned and walked into the kitchen and retrieved the apple tart she had remade for the dinner.

"Yes well I see that you have employed your time well. Perhaps much better than I have." He nodded his head and left the room.

Elizabeth was shocked. What did he mean, his behavior is so strange, he probably was mocking me somehow and I didn't realize.

She resumed her preparations and by dinnertime everything looked exquisite and smelled marvelous. The apple tart request and Mr. Darcy's sister helped Elizabeth to finalize her menu. She guessed that with such a homey dessert Darcy probably wanted to convey a sense of family to his sister before she went off to school so Elizabeth followed suit with a savory chicken dish, roasted potatoes and a vegetable casserole. She hoped it was not to simple for the rest of the company's taste.

Everyone was seated, Mr. Darcy at the head of the table, closest to the kitchen entrance, his sister to his right and Miss Bingley to his left with Charles next to his sister. The meal proceeded uneventfully. After serving, Elizabeth sat at the kitchen table, allowing them time to eat and talk but staying alert if she heard them wanting for anything. At one point Mr. Bingley expressed how much he was enjoying the chicken so Elizabeth brought out the plate thinking he might like seconds.

"Darcy you have found a wonderful housekeeper. I only have to think chicken and she appears from behind you." Bingley's eyes twinkled.

"William I had the most interesting conversation with your housekeeper this afternoon, didn't we Miss Bennet?" Caroline looked at Elizabeth with a cunning smile and a slight wink.

Darcy looked over to Caroline, confused as to what these two women could having a lengthy discussion over.

"We were both commenting on how you really need to update the house. It has become dark and rather drab really. Oh I know you enjoy playing the martyr up hear but you needn't keep everything how your parents left it, for goodness sakes Reynolds is even gone now, there should be nothing holding you back from making a complete overhaul. Don't misunderstand me I think it was admirable for you to wait for her to retire, feeling that she couldn't handle all that responsibility, but now you must make a change."

Mr. Darcy still held his fork and knife but had stopped moving them when Mrs. Reynolds had been mentioned. He looked down at his plate and stared for what seemed two full minutes. Elizabeth looked over at Georgiana, the girl had stopped eating and now just looked at her brother, her face betrayed a worry that sharpened her otherwise soft features.

"Oh come now, I know it is a major undertaking but I would love to offer my services." Caroline leaned into William.

"Thank you for your offer but I am not interested in changing anything right now. I am sorry if everyone is displeased with the surroundings but I have no plans for change in the near future." Darcy's voice was so calm and quiet it put everyone ill at ease.

Mr. Bingley, feeling his friends distress, and his sisters blunder quickly changed the subject back to food.

"Miss Bennet may we have dessert I have been longing for it since I first tasted it yesterday."

Elizabeth, happy to escape the tension disappeared to fetch the tart.

"How could she lie about what I said so easily. This is now twice in one day. Oh that woman is dreadful." Elizabeth muttered under her breath as she collected the dessert things.

"Who has lied about what you said Lizzy" A concerned voice came from the corner of the kitchen.

Elizabeth turned to find her sister Jane near the side door.

"Jane, what are you doing here? It is so good to see you." Elizabeth's eyes filled with tears, so happy to see Jane's face.

"What is going on here? Are you being treated properly?"

"Oh, yes yes, everything is all right." Lizzy sniffed quickly and composed herself not wanting Jane to worry.

"I come bearing gifts." Jane produced a key from her pocket and waved it in the air. "You are no longer stranded on your days off. My friend Suzy came through with a friend who wanted to sell his pick-up."

"A pick up? Oh Jane I've only driven compact cars."

"It's easy. I drove all the way here without a problem."

Elizabeth smiled, " I hope you didn't have to go on any blind dates for this." The two girls laughed, forgetting for a moment where they were.

Darcy and Bingley glanced at each other, each having heard the laughter. Georgiana and Caroline were talking and oblivious.

Darcy rose to investigate, not being able to imagine who the other person might be that was laughing, when Bingley stood and waved him to resume sitting.

"Let me go. I need to stretch my legs."

Charles immediately noticed Jane Bennet at the back door.

"Oh Mr. Bingley, forgive me, you have been waiting so patiently for your dessert. You see my sister has surprised me with a car." Lizzy explained.

Charles could not take his eyes off Jane. Her golden hair and fair complexion lit up the kitchen. When she smiled in greeting toward him he became fully entranced.

"What is going on in here?" Mr. Darcy pushed open the door looking very irritated.

"Oh it is my fault sir. My sister Jane has surprised me with a car and I forgot myself for a moment. I will bring out the dessert things directly."

Mr. Darcy and Bingley left the kitchen, one much quicker than the other.

When everyone had finished dessert and coffee Elizabeth felt it was acceptable to slip outside to peek at her new car. Jane had been waiting patiently in the kitchen and even pitched in with the dishes so that Lizzy would be finished a bit more quickly.

The sisters stepped out into the night air and it smelled wonderful. Mr. Darcy had lit a fire in the library and the smell of the smoke reminded Elizabeth of happier times, when she had been camping with her family.

The truck Jane brought was beat up but serviceable. Perhaps she could help Pryce with some of his gardening duties using the pick-up. Elizabeth slipped into the drivers seat while Jane stood at her window.

"Well, how are things going Lizzy?" Jane questioned.

"I'm really not sure. I like the work part, taking care of the house, cooking, cleaning but I feel that something more is expected or perhaps something is missing but I haven't figured out what it is yet." Lizzy looked confused.

"You're not alone Lizzy, I'm still trying to figure out everything I'm supposed to do and I've had my job for five years. Mr. Darcy seems very tense?"

Mr. Bingley walked around the side of the house down the path towards them.

"Good evening ladies it's a perfect evening. I was sitting by the fire thinking when I realized your sister would probably need a ride somewhere.....since she drove this car here....which I believe is presumably yours now Miss Bennet." He nervously looked toward Elizabeth.

Elizabeth smiled but turned her head into the shadow cast on the drivers seat so Jane and Mr. Bingley wouldn't see her expression.

"Yes Mr. Bingley you are very right. Jane and I were just about to call a cab to take her to the hotel in town.

"I see, then you will be staying on for the rest of the weekend?" Charles had turned to Jane.

"Yes, I'm afraid I don't know when I'll be back this way for a while and want to visit with my sister, even if it is only for a few hours." Jane was surprised by Mr. Bingley's inquisitiveness.

"I hope you don't think me to forward Miss Bennet but I felt you would not venture to ask Mr. Darcy if your sister would be invited to stay at the house, so I inquired for you.

He agreed quickly and mentioned that there was an additional guest bedroom already prepared." Bingley smiled with a hoping look in his eyes.

"Mr. Bingley you have once again been to kind." Mr. Bingley and Jane stepped back from the truck and chatted with each other. Elizabeth tried to appear interested with her new vehicle.

Actually she was thinking about Mr. Darcy's generosity, especially after Caroline's speech tonight. He probably thinks I despise the house and find it terribly dreary when it is so opposite from the truth. Upset with Miss Bingley, Elizabeth tightened her grip on the steering wheel.

Part III

Posted on Thursday, 20 June 2002

It was getting late and Elizabeth excused herself from Mr. Bingley and Jane. She walked through the kitchen toward the library, knowing that Mr. Darcy usually ended his day reading in front of the fire.

When she entered her shoulders tensed to see Caroline Bingley sitting opposite Mr. Darcy, reading as well. Georgiana was on the same couch as her brother staring at the fireplace. It was deathly quiet.

"Sir, if there won't be anything else I shall turn in."

Darcy looked up from his book.

"Yes that will be all Miss Bennet.....good night."

Elizabeth nodded her head and said good night as well. She was turning to leave when Darcy cleared his throat.

"Ah Miss Bennet, thank you for making the dinner in Mrs. Brown's absence, along with all your other duties. Everything was quite good."

Elizabeth smiled broadly, it was the first compliment she had received from her employer and she hated to admit that she really needed it.

"Oh yes, the meal was very savory. You must have used quite a lot of butter and salt, a very special occasion meal. I myself usually eat so health consciously that a meal like that is such a treat." Caroline smiled triumphantly.

Elizabeth went upstairs shaking her head. She assumed Jane would be up soon so she changed her clothes and pulled out the quilt she was working on. She turned on the radio and sat down on her bed, with some pieces spread out in front of her. Her least favorite part of quilting was deciding on the pattern. There were so many sometimes she couldn't choose, she had trouble envisioning the finished product with the materials she had to work with. However, once she had finally chosen a method the work was what she loved, pulling all the pieces together, checking to see that everything fit correctly, cutting the proper shapes.

Not long before she started a soft knock came at the door and Jane entered.

"Lizzy your room looks wonderful. You have really made it cozy. I love the curtains."

Jane stood and admired the white quilted curtains with the blue flowers appliquéd on the side panels.

"Jane I think you are trying to distract me from my obvious question."

"What do you mean?"

"Jane......he is very handsome and from as far as I can tell very sweet."

"Oh Lizzy we were just talking. I'm sure he has many girlfriends."

"Perhaps, but maybe not for long." The two sisters laughed.

Jane had left the door open to Lizzy's room and they both noticed Georgiana walk by. Lizzy rose and went to the hallway.

"Miss Darcy may I be of some service? Are you searching for something?"

"Oh Miss Bennet I am looking for a needle and thread. I have ripped my riding pants and I know my brother wants to ride out tomorrow. Do you have one?"

"Why yes of course. Come in please."

Georgiana stepped in the small room and saw Jane half lying on the bed. There was a small ironing board set up against the wall with pieces of crisp material slung over. A small table was constructed from a wood plank balanced with some heavy books underneath, atop sat a sewing machine and small lamp.

Georgiana sensed that she had walked into an intimate moment between the sisters but she longed to remain. Elizabeth fumbled through a large basket and produced some brown thread and a needle.

"Would you like me to do this for you? It won't take but a minute." Elizabeth motioned her to come into the small room further. "You can sit and wait if you like."

Jane moved over and offered the girl a place on the bed.

"Are you looking forward to going back to school?" Elizabeth ventured.

"I am going back but not to the same school." Jane and Elizabeth quickly glanced at each other, not wanting to pry, they averted their eyes.

"You see my brother feels that Gray academy will be more challenging for me." Georgiana shifted in her seat beginning to feel uncomfortable.

"I'm sure you'll meet some nice girls there. Perhaps you'll even wind up with a great roommate." Elizabeth tried to lighten Georgiana's mood.

"William insisted on a private room for me. He feels that to much socializing will interfere with my studies."

Elizabeth and Jane did not dare look at each other. Their faces must have betrayed them for Georgiana rose from the bed and walked to the ironing board.

"This is really beautiful." She fingered the material. "Will this be a blanket?"

"Yes." Elizabeth walked over and stood by the girl. "Do you enjoy doing any sort of handwork?"

"I'm afraid I never learned. I know my mother loved embroidery, there are a few pieces about the house, but she died when I was very young and so I never had the chance to learn."

"Well...on your holidays from school maybe I could teach you some."

Georgiana turned, "Quilting, like this?"

"If you like." Elizabeth walked to her bedside table and picked up a book. This is a good place to start. I can also pull together some material you could start trying to cut while you're at school.

Georgiana lit up. She hugged the book to her chest.

"Oh thank you Miss Bennet." Elizabeth had to look away so as not to reveal that she was almost welling up. The girl needed attention and love so badly.

"I'll finish your pants this evening and give them back to you with the material tomorrow before you leave."

"Yes that'll be just perfect. Thank you again."

Georgiana left still clutching the book.

"I am worried about her." Elizabeth looked at Jane with concern.

"I wonder why she isn't returning to the same school? Do you think something happened?" Jane queried.

"Or perhaps Mr. Darcy did not find anyone or anything about the school suitable enough. Really Jane, he confuses me so."

"Perhaps your judgment is clouded by something?"

"What do you mean?" Elizabeth wondered at Jane's question.

"I don't know but there is something about his intensity that I find attractive and if I were in his company often I would feel compelled to find the good in him even if it were very hard to find, so when you hear about his poor behaviors you try very hard to overlook them."

"Well you have just done a wonderful job of describing yourself but I do not have your goodness Jane and with each incident I can assure you the opinion I have of Mr. Darcy becomes diminished."

"I will not argue with you about your feelings for Mr. Darcy, as I can see they are strong, as for your goodness I will not accept your own opinion of yourself." Jane rose and slipped her arm through Elizabeth's. "Now walk me to my room."

Elizabeth agreed, unsure how to take Jane's comments.

Elizabeth was up early preparing breakfast in the kitchen when Jane came in searching for her.

"Lizzy I must ask you something." Jane was flustered.

"What Jane?... anything." Elizabeth stopped her preparations and threw her tea towel over her shoulder.

"Mr. Bingley has asked me to ride with himself, Mr. Darcy, Georgiana and his sister. My first thought was that it was inappropriate but he pressed and assured me he had the total agreement of the others." Jane searched Lizzy's face for her reaction.

"Jane.....I must say I'm very surprised but if you want to go I think you should."

"Are you sure? I don't want you to feel awkward."

"I'm sure, have a good time I'll see you later."

The day passed quickly, with all the guests out of the house Elizabeth took the opportunity to straighten the guests rooms and prepare a light meal for supper, knowing that everyone would be leaving that night.

She was finishing up in Georgiana's room when the girl came in from riding. Lizzy turned to see her in riding pants and white shirt, she had removed her hat and her blond tendrils fell around her shoulders. She smiled warmly at Elizabeth and moved toward the closet.

"I have to finish packing quickly. I told William I was already finished so I could go riding out with everyone."

"Would you like me to help?"

"Oh yes. I need all the clothes in that bureau."

They started slowly being very careful to smooth everything out but sensing that time was getting shorter they both sped up, soon they were practically throwing the clothes in the suitcase. Their laughter grew louder and culminated when Georgiana tried to close the top and it was obvious it might never zipper.

"Wait." Elizabeth climbed on the bed and sat on top of the suitcase. Peals of laughter brought Mr. Darcy in from the hallway. With their backs turned they hadn't seen him enter. Georgiana finished the zipper and put her hands on Elizabeth's shoulders.

"Perhaps we should include an iron with your things. I'm afraid they are going to be terribly wrinkled." Elizabeth continued giggling and turned to face Georgiana, she immediately saw Mr. Darcy standing at the doorway. She jumped off the suitcase to the floor.

Mr. Darcy folded his arms and smiled. "Please ladies do not let me interrupt this lesson in efficiency. I must say your speed is admirable but I'm not so sure about your accuracy."

Elizabeth, although happy that he was not upset, felt very embarrassed about her position.

"I'm sorry, please excuse me." She practically ran from the room.

Darcy stepped away to allow her to leave. The top of her head breezed by just at the level of his shoulder. He watched her walk down the hallway wishing they had started off on a better footing.

Georgiana, Jane, Mr. Bingley and his sister got off and the house became quiet. Life at the estate entered a routine that Elizabeth found pleasing. She and Mrs. Brown became friendly and she had started visiting with Mr. Pryce, the gardener, out at his cottage. Mr. Darcy worked very late. Occasionally they would have short discussions on household topics but they were usually brief and then he would retire to the library and she would go to her room and work on her quilting.

Darcy's workload had not increased in proportion with the hours he had been putting in at the office. It had become an escape and an excuse. If he was working late Charles could not badger him about going out and meeting with friends. The last time he had, supposedly 'found' someone for him, it was a complete disaster. She had been pretty enough but her sense of humor was so grating, endlessly looking for a joke in everything that was discussed. Never again, he had sworn to himself.

He had stuck to his resolution about socializing until Charles had phoned that morning. William's interest was piqued when Charles invited him to a party at his sister's apartment. Normally that would not have been a draw but Charles revealed that he would be bringing someone Will was familiar with, Elizabeth Bennet's sister, Jane. Darcy was concerned about this relationship and so agreed, rationalizing that he was only going to monitor the two together and ascertain the degree of affection on both sides.

As soon as he entered the apartment he regretted his decision. Caroline cornered him with drinks and began her ego stroking. Little did she realize that with every compliment he recoiled from her grasp. Silently, he blocked out Caroline's monologue on the horrors of contemporary society and searched out Charles and Jane. He spied them near the window. They were speaking quietly and occasionally she laughed. He looked a bit nervous but that wasn't unusual. Bingley was so worried about never offending anyone he tended to talk a bit much. Darcy never minded this habit because they were always comfortable together but he had noticed it when they were with others. Darcy dismissed the flaw as a by product of an overly strict father. He, himself, had struggled with the same problem as a younger man but he allowed Charles more time to shed this juvenile habit.

Confident that Jane and Charles were not very serious he made some motions to leave. Caroline began to insist that he stay.

"Now William we won't let you go. You have been working much to hard. Isn't that right Charles?"

"I have to admit Darcy you have been very scarce lately."

William looked at Bingley, "Charles you know how busy I've been."

He hated this ambush. His life was fine the way it was besides what did Caroline and Charles know about work, their father was still alive, Bingley's father had been easing him into the business for the last ten years. He had been thrown to the wolves and scrambled to maintain his families holdings while raising his sister.

"Now William we are only trying to help you. Honestly, you have been almost reclusive these last few months and we're worried for you." Bingley put his arm around Jane and hung his head down.

Darcy was blocking their attempt to draw him out, but he did see Bingley and Jane standing very close and Charles using her strength to help him speak his mind to his friend. The casual friendship had jumped to intimate with that one gesture. He must talk with Charles, this was not proper for either party involved.

Darcy walked into the kitchen to pour himself a coffee and shortly after Charles followed behind.

"William I'm sorry about that back there. I hope we didn't make you feel uncomfortable."

Darcy waved his hand to assure Charles no harm had been done.

"It is I who have become concerned about you Charles. I see you are becoming serious with Jane Bennet. Do you think this wise?"

"Wise?....well yes. I like her very much." Bingley looked to Darcy.

"Tell me what does your sister think of your relationship?" Darcy hated himself for this question, for it was unfair, he knew the answer before he asked, Caroline would never condone a girlfriend for Charles that actually had to work, but he was sure that if two of his closest people were questioning this relationship he would begin to question himself. Darcy knew, by some, this would be considered cruel but it was necessary for Charles' safety as well as Jane's. They undoubtedly would both be hurt when the affair ended badly. William couldn't help admitting that Elizabeth Bennet's distress should this happen agitated him.

"You are referring to class? Yes of course Caroline disapproves but we both know to what depth of feeling that comes from. It is not in my best interest but hers. I have found someone wonderful and I want her. She is everything that has been missing in my life and I refuse to lose that to please others. I'm sorry if you are in disagreement William but your opinion comes without understanding. It pains me to say this Darcy but you are in no position to judge me. You have no one and the way you conduct yourself is ensuring your solitude. I am sorry friend but I am not ready to be old and without love."

Charles' words stunned Darcy, he stood motionless trying to collect himself. When he felt ready to speak his manner was calm and quiet, trying to appear unmoved.

"Please excuse my interference Charles. I hope that you will overlook my intrusiveness." With that he strode to the closet collected his jacket. He calmly left the apartment and walked quickly to his car.

He is making a mistake. I'm sure of it. He is only trying to stall the inevitable and thinks by disparaging my life he will make his own decision valid.

Darcy drove erratically out of the parking garage. Rain was falling and he flicked on the wipers.

"Jane Bennet indeed. I can imagine what his father will say when he brings her to the house."

He rode the gear shift hard and arrived in his village far to quickly. He thought of the look on Charles face when he tried to question his choice. He had been wrong and his friend, who was always so forgiving and understanding of everyone's feelings, had lost all his patience. He turned the curve that lead to the driveway, pressing hard on the gas pedal, he gripped the wheel , pulling it almost out of the mount in anger, anger at his own foolishness. All this time, he thought, he had been protecting Bingley, watching out for him, in his foolish loves, business, with friends, but the truth hit him hard and just before the car hit the curb he realized it was the exact opposite.

He skidded but the stonewall on the right side caught the car before it could spin out of control. Darcy was holding the wheel so tightly he had braced himself when the car made contact with the wall. He was unhurt but shaken. He tugged on the emergency brake and reached for his cell phone, then dropped it. He was so close to the house, and because the car was on the side of the rode he decided to walk up to the house and call the tow truck.

He was drenched by the time he reached the house and headed for the kitchen entrance.

He opened the door and saw a mist rising from the kitchen table. It was Miss Bennet, she looked up, gazing through the steam, her wispy hair was delicately curled by the steam that Darcy now realized rose from an iron. Her mouth pursed slightly and she cocked her head to the side, not understanding the situation.

"Mr. Darcy ....you are home.....and you are soaked." She moved around the table towards him. Are you all right. What happened?"

William could see the concern in her face and it warmed him down to the core. He shrugged his shoulders and noticed how tense they had been all day.

"Don't be alarmed Miss Bennet but I have had a small accident with the car." He knew she would be alarmed and waited for her reaction.

"Accident....but are you hurt...how far have you come... are you cold?" She wrung her hands and inspected him with her eyes. He knew she was looking for signs of shock or injury.

He waved his hand to allay her fears.

"Please I am fine but I must call the garage for the tow truck. I left the car on the curve just before the driveway." He carefully removed his shoes, left them by the door and walked out of the kitchen.

Lizzy quickly unplugged the iron and gathered her material. She put the kettle on for tea and waited by the stove. I wonder if he is hurt and doesn't realize. She went to the door and peeked out, listening for any strange noises.

When the tea was ready she went to the library.

"Sir?"

"Yes, come in."

Darcy had changed into black pants and a turtleneck sweater. He was seated in his wing chair near the fire holding a short drink.

"I brought you some tea....Oh I'm sorry you already have a drink."

"No it's all right I think tea would be much better." He began to rise to meet her halfway.

"Don't get up."

He obeyed. She came over and handed him the hot tea. She smiled, relieved that he seemed fine.

He didn't want her to leave that spot. She looked so pretty, with her furrowed brow and her little apron. She turned to leave and he struggled to think of anything to say.

"Miss Bennet I have been thinking about Miss Bingley's suggestion of updating the house and thought you might have some suggestions."

"....Oh sir, I....I must tell you....uh ...um."

"What, you can tell me. Don't be afraid."

He was so gentle at that moment that she felt perhaps she could tell him the truth.

"Miss Bingley spoke out of turn when she included me in her view of the house. I'm sure she must have misunderstood."

I'm sure she didn't Darcy thought. "So you like the house the way it is then. You wouldn't change anything?"

Part IV

Posted on Sunday, 30 June 2002

"Oh I like the house very much, especially the kitchen. It is grand but because you have not overdone its interior it retains a feel of hominess. No I wouldn't change a thing on the inside." Elizabeth had constructed her sentence so that she hadn't lied.

Darcy smiled for he sensed she was hiding a wish for something to be changed.

"You have chosen your words very carefully Miss Bennet." Darcy sipped his tea, averting his eyes from her and hiding his pleasure behind his cup."

"Yes, words can be so easily misunderstood. People can speak with all goodness in their hearts but because of the situation, they find themselves perceived by others as mean or cruel." Elizabeth folded her hands over her apron to hide the tea stains she had just become conscious of.

Darcy put his head back on his chair and let her words and voice seep into him. He wanted so much to believe her, but in the blackness of his mind he knew his argument with Charles that evening had not come from a good place in his heart, it had come from a very bad place, a section that had been in recent years growing exponentially.

Lizzy stared at Darcy while his eyes were closed. His usually strong frame appeared vulnerable, perhaps the ordeal with the car had exhausted him but it was more than fatigue that weakened him, it was a succumbing, a drowning. She unfolded her hands and dug them deep into her apron pockets.

"Not enough color." She blurted out.

He roused and looked at her, noticing the tea stains on her apron but trying not to look.

"Color? You mean on the walls?"

Elizabeth breathed a laugh, "No, sir I mean flowers. I arrived in late summer, early fall but there were very few flowers blooming outside."

"Oh I understand" He thought for a moment then rose from his chair and walked to the furthest bookshelf and took down what looked to be a photo album. The cover was dark brown, made of a hard cardboard and inside the pages were black paper. Darcy had to undo some very ancient looking ties that were the same material they make shoelaces from. He set the album down on his desk and flipped to the middle.

"Here it is", he smiled looking like he had been transported back to another time.

"Miss Bennet come here I'd like to show you something."

As she came to the desk he sat down in his chair, when she was by his side there heads were almost at the same level. She looked down at the photos. They were black and white with a deckled edging around the sides. Each one was slipped into tiny black corner holders. The picture he pointed out was of three people standing in front of a garden that must have stretched out for a mile. There were two men, one young and very handsome, tall with black wavy hair. The other was an older gentleman, holding a pair of pruning shears. There was a woman too, she was smaller with a pretty figure. With his free hand the older gentleman was holding up the woman's arm, as if in victory.

"Unfortunately you can't see the colors but at one time we had gardens here that were spectacular. I remember wandering through a field of sunflowers once that were twice my height and pretending I was in the land of the giants."

"Are these your parents, Mr. Darcy?"

"Yes, this is my father." He pointed to the younger gentleman. "And this was my mother."

Lizzy leaned in to look more closely at Mrs. Darcy.

"She was very pretty. Georgiana has her features I think but not her coloring."

"You are very observant Miss Bennet."

"Who is this Mr. Darcy?" Elizabeth pointed to the older gentleman, who was holding his mother's hand up.

"He is why I have taken the album out to show you Miss Bennet. That's Pryce the gardener and driver.

Elizabeth shifted her weight and bent down closer to the photo. Darcy could smell the scent of her hair, it wasn't perfumed but had just a subtle hint of lavender.

"But he appears older here already. Mr. Darcy how can that be?"

"Pryce is 75 years old Miss Bennet. He still drives for me occasionally and maintains some bushes and plants but he tires quickly. I have seen you talking with him and I'm sure you have observed his hands, they are quite distorted now by arthritis. He tries to conceal the disease from me by wearing gloves but I have known about it for some time."

"He doesn't wish to retire? Is he without family?" Darcy watched Elizabeth as she questioned. Her right hand was placed on the desk for support and her weight was shifted to her right leg, the left foot was slightly raised out of her cream colored loafer. Such old shoes for such a young woman...

"He never married and I believe all his relatives are deceased. Only once do I remember him leaving for holiday. He was devoted to my parents and the estate. My mother took up gardening, probably at first to combat loneliness, but with Pryce's help she transformed the grounds. When my father would come back from a trip I remember the first thing he would do is walk outside with my mother, anxious to hear and see everything new that she had planted and was planning for the future."

Darcy pulled himself back to the photos, "I can't bring in someone new...not yet."

Elizabeth straightened, "...maybe I could do some planting, just bulbs now, allowing Pryce to instruct me on proper method. He could help me plan and buy the bulbs that way he would still maintain his title but allow me to do the grunt work. I have a pick-up truck now."

Darcy could not help but smile at this last statement, he pictured Elizabeth trying to load heavy bags of soil and plants into the back of her pick-up, realizing she had forgotten to take off her apron and little white house shoes.

He felt that he could trust her with this delicate situation and so agreed.

"I'll need you to keep me informed on your progress." Darcy quickly added.

"Of course."

The phone rang and Darcy rose to answer it.

"That will be the garage with the bad news."

Elizabeth took the tea things and left for the kitchen. While cleaning up and organizing her material Lizzy considered what bulbs she should plant. Perhaps she could go to the library in town tomorrow and take some books out for ideas. Shaking her head remembering Mr. Darcy's speech about the library being off limits to her. He seemed so different tonight.

Her mind replayed the image of Mr. Darcy in his wing chair when she first brought the tea in. It calmed her more than she could explain, he was where he should be and he was unharmed by the accident. His presence in the house comforted her, regardless of whether they were in the same room. The nights when Darcy came home at a reasonable hour and retired to the library to read while she sewed upstairs was beginning to feel like a comfortable relationship, "Oh I am so pathetic," she said to herself. My idea of a relationship is living with a man as his housekeeper and spending quality time in separate rooms. I need to get out more. I'm losing touch.

Before leaving the kitchen she noticed the shoes by the door. They were black wingtips. She reached down to feel if they were dry. Knowing that he would probably need them for work, if he were going to the office tomorrow. She carried them through the house but Mr. Darcy was gone.

"I'll just leave these in his room."

Lizzy went upstairs and saw that the door to his rooms was left open.

Perhaps he is in the bathroom or down in his study. I'll just leave them by the closet. As she entered she noticed the bathroom light was on. Glancing up, a vision was imprinted. The hand came down to deposit a blue object into the vanity draw so quickly that Lizzy knew he must have sensed the movement of her body across the carpet. His countenance convinced her that he felt he had not been seen but that one second had revealed something more than just the action of taking an inhaler, Lizzy assumed for asthma, but a secretive fear of someone seeing him.

Lizzy looked away, "Oh sir excuse me I just thought you might need your shoes."

Darcy had closed the draw, exhaled almost imperceptibly, and turned his back, leaning against the draw.

"Oh yes of course." His features tensed, Lizzy perceived the plane that they were on during their conversation downstairs had been wiped away, equality had been reduced by one glance. She felt exhausted and rose to leave.

The earth just beyond the kitchen was as hard as a rock. Lizzy had backed the blue pick-up around and lowered the back panel. Bags of mulch and soil littered the ground nearby. When Darcy drove in he saw Elizabeth with chin, on top of hands, on top of shovel tip looking out into the field beyond. He pulled into the garage and walked down the path toward the kitchen. The sun had gone down and darkness was beginning to press in on the periphery.

"I don't remember gardening being so messy." Darcy looked down at a dirty piece of notebook paper next to one of the empty bags of soil, with ink drawings of blooming flowers in a strip, marred only by the thin blue lines of the page.

Elizabeth turned, replaced her chin with her right cheek, to tired to straighten up.

"I would like to make a progress report but your soil is so filled with rocks that I have not accomplished half of my plan."

Darcy placed his hands on his hips, desperately trying not to smile while thinking that her master plan for his estates garden was sketched out on a note sheet. He took his suit jacket off and hung it over the pick-up's side. He rolled up his sleeve and loosened his tie.

"May I?"

Lizzy handed him the shovel and stepped back. She watched him dig in, one errant black curl bobbed with each pound of the shovel. The stones and rocks did not impede him and his trench was lengthening quickly. Darcy worked against the shadows and Elizabeth looked on as things turned from color to gray as the light faded.

He looked up and squinted with exertion, " Do you have the bulbs? Let's finish this off before we lose the light."

Lizzy opened the package of bulbs and handed him half.

They started at either end of the trench and worked quickly, placing and covering until meeting in the middle.

"What are we putting to bed here Miss Bennet?"

"Black bearded irises"

"Hmmm..."

They looked down at the freshly covered line. Elizabeth walked away first toward the truck.

"You do not care for Irises Mr. Darcy?"

"Oh yes. I just expected...well ...something different."

Lizzy turned and in the last few beads of light she stepped forward.

"Oh they are so beautiful, wait till you see them. After the crocuses and the poppy's you think nothing can cheer you more perfectly, but all the while, behind these delicate papers, emerge these gigantic stalks, with buds 5 inches tall. A deep purple, almost black, petal flops over and on each side there is a little furry strip, just like a beard."

Darcy lightly pressed the fresh earth with his wingtip.

" I look forward to the spring...Miss Bennet."

Part IV

Posted on Wednesday, 31 July 2002

September turned to November and the weather was cold. The days were very short and Elizabeth was spending a lot of her spare time quilting. The village was going to have a large arts and crafts festival over the Thanksgiving weekend and she decided to rent a table, hoping to make some extra money for Christmas. She wanted to get something nice for Jane this year and if Georgiana took to quilting she thought she would get her some tools.

Mrs. Brown had Friday and Sunday off and Elizabeth did the cooking on those evenings. On this particular Friday, Mr. Darcy was working from the house. She was feeling adventurous and decided to make homemade pizza. She had no idea what toppings he might like but she thought mushrooms and cheese would be neutral enough. While she kneaded the dough he walked through the door.

"Miss Bennet, Georgiana will be coming home for the Thanksgiving weekend and she needs a spare trunk. There is a large trunk in the attic that would be suitable. I would like you to clean it out. I believe it contains some of my mother's old clothes and coats. You can bag them and I will dispose of them and then I'll bring the trunk down. I want to bring it with me when I go to pick her up on Wednesday."

He stood near the kitchen window and looked out to the patch of garden they had worked on together, imagining the rows of flowers like a painting inside the window.

"How long will your sister be visiting, sir?"

He didn't turn to face her.

""She'll only be here until Sunday and then she must go back?"

Elizabeth hesitantly asked a personal question.

"How is she getting along at school?"

"I'm afraid she's unhappy." He was more thinking out loud than talking. Elizabeth stopped flattening the pizza dough and looked up to him. She never thought he would answer with anything more than 'fine'.

His hands were spread out with his palms down on the counter and his shoulders shrugged forward.

"Is there anything that can be done." She offered what she could.

"I don't know." He straightened and turned, Elizabeth looked down to the pizza, barely looking at what she was doing, her hands were almost shaking.

He noticed her hands and knew he had become too personal.

"Is that pizza?"

"Yes."

"I thought the cheese went on top of the sauce" He laughed to break the tension and stole a mushroom from the bowl on the table.

Elizabeth laughed, realizing what she had done. She moved for a spoon to scrape off her mistake.

"No." He touched her arm lightly. "Please, I'm not hungry, just order something for yourself if you like. I'm going to ride."

He left and Elizabeth cleared away the mess. Without dinner to prepare and clean up after she decided to take the free time to work on her stonewall. She and Pryce had picked out the stones at the garden center and had them loaded into the truck.

She fetched her old coat and gloves, pulled on her work boots and headed out the kitchen entrance. She pulled the truck around and started in on her project. As she worked, placing stones and readjusting position, she thought of Georgiana, poor girl, alone at school, trying to fit into a new place. Lizzy walked back to the truck, looking for a small flat one to fit on top. She looked up when she heard horse hooves.

He stopped just short of the hemlock tree to the left of the garden. She watched him dismount, he had a black sweater and old brown leather jacket on, his face was ruddy from the cold and as soon as he had swung down he took a long draught from a water bottle that was inside Havanna's side pack.

"You have hidden talents Miss Bennet. Housekeeping, quilting, gardening, cooking and now masonry."

She was relieved that cooking had made the list, considering some of her past blunders but wondered how he knew about the quilting.

"Yes, a jack of all trades but master of none I'm afraid." She smiled warmly and walked to the truck for another rock."

"But you are still young, something might rise to the surface." He followed slowly behind her.

"Perhaps." She looked for a large stone with the edge slanted.

Darcy reached in and plucked out what she was looking for, he handed it to her and they walked back, stride for stride.

Lizzy bent down, pushing the stone up to its neighbor, she felt him watching her and she turned to him and rose up, "Would you like to help me sir?"

He turned to cough, more than once. She waited for his answer, noticing that he still seemed a bit winded from riding. He continued coughing and walked back for the water bottle. He drank a few times and the coughing subsided. Lizzy thought of the inhaler she had seen him try to conceal, so she turned her head, pretending that she hadn't noticed his coughing.

He walked back, "I'm afraid Havanna is spent, I should bring her back to the stable." He grabbed the reigns, nodded his head and led the horse away.

The ritual of evening tea had been established and accepted by both Darcy and Elizabeth without invitation. She knocked softly, insecure about what mood she would find him in, his spirits over Georgiana being low, not wanting to jar his reflections, hoping he was on the track of a solution to her unhappiness.

She heard the same coughing she had heard outside, when he saw her enter he waved her in, straightening in his chair and laying his book aside.

He accepted the tea and took a sip before speaking, replacing the cup to the saucer, seemingly restored he looked over at his book.

"I have been thinking about your stonewall Miss Bennet and remembered this volume on gardening of my mother's. He exchanged the cup for the book and flipped to the table of contents. There are quite a few chapters I think you would find interesting, he continued to read the chapter titles to himself silently, avoiding the reaction in her eyes."

She walked behind his chair and held the wing, looking down at the book. Her eyes scanned the words but she read none of it.

He turned to a page with a stone wall, similar to her idea.

"Is this what you had in mind? Here they have used a raised bed but I think it would look quite good around our garden as well"

Hesitation marked her voice but she willed it to respond, "It is very nice." He turned the page and she forgot her grievances. "Oh, a spot for shade." The photo showed a pergola with greenery on top.

"Do you think it's possible?"

"To the left of the hemlock, Pryce is very capable with buying building materials."

" I would like to build it myself,...sir"

Darcy gazed at the pergola, the length and weight of the beams, the mass....she can't do it, he thought, not properly anyway, he wanted to say yes but it wouldn't come.

In her enthusiasm Lizzy hadn't noticed his silence, she bent down next to his chair to have a closer look at the page.

"I may need some help placing the heavier beams?" She didn't look up.

"Pryce I think is not up to that challenge but....if I have some extra time I could help you."

"May I" Elizabeth took the book into her own hands and flipped through the pages.

He knew he should offer her a seat but she was so close to him, kneeling on the floor beside his chair. He marveled at the color of her skin and the smallness of her mouth.

"Oh look this one is made of all natural materials. It says here the wood can be found, borrowed or bartered for." She giggled.

He watched while she read, settled back in his chair and hoped that she would never stop.

"The wood should be cedar but other types would be acceptable." Her brow furrowed. " Do you have cedar in these woods?"

"Yes, I believe so. If I ride out tomorrow I'll explore a bit."

She noticed his steady gaze and closed the book.

"I should be leaving, thank you for the ideas."

"Please, keep the book for a while." He took up his tea unsure if she would accept.

"I think it would be safer in here."

His countenance stiffened, he knew it wasn't enough.

"All right but let's leave it that you may come in and look at it any time....as well as all the other books."

She had crossed the room to the desk and replaced the book. She relented, with a feeling of dread but said, "Thank you."

The locks on the steamer were a warm worn brass and Elizabeth rubbed the dust off them with a cloth. It was old, not the flat rectangular shape with stickers but their was a rise to the top and it wasn't black but green. As she worked on the dust the color of the leather became deeper, like a dark moss.

Once the trunk was clean Elizabeth opened it up. It was full of women's clothes. Lizzy sunk her hands down into the trunk, she guessed at the materials from the textures she felt. There were silks, taffeta, velvets, cottons. The top portion contained more of the fancy dresses and accessories, one was a beautiful deep green velvet dress, much the same color of the trunk. When Lizzy picked it up the skirt billowed out supported by the tulle and taffeta underneath. Mrs. Darcy must have looked beautiful Lizzy mused. What must her life have been like, here alone with her children, while her husband, was always away on business. She remembered Darcy's explanation for her interest in gardening, " to combat loneliness." It sounded more like a fight than a distraction, as if she was proving something, like the picture, where Pryce is holding up Mrs. Darcy's arm in victory. She had seen that intensity in her son. Elizabeth hugged the dress close and longed for Jane.

After cleaning out the inside of the trunk to satisfaction Lizzy began loading the clothes into bags.

"This is such a shame." Lizzy couldn't bear the thought of Mrs. Darcy's clothes being given away or thrown out. She had an idea and worked quickly. In one bag she placed the clothes that were severely damaged by age or moth holes but in another bag she placed the salvageable garments. The accessories and handbags she put aside for Georgiana. Only stopping a few times to sneeze from all the dust Lizzy had finished her work by lunchtime. She tied up the garment bags, pulling the saved clothes over by the window. When she stood up she saw Mr. Darcy riding Havanna back towards the stable.

She knew he would come up to retrieve the trunk and collect the clothes and perhaps see the other bag. Sizing up the trunk she walked over to it and lifted the end. She had enough time to drag it down the stairs and run back up for the clothes. She lugged the trunk to the steps and pulled it toward her but at intervals had to push it from coming down to fast. She made it to the landing, setting it down while she cleared her throat from the musty stairway. Again she descended down, she almost made it to the bottom but she tugged to hard, anxious to be finished the trunk barreled into her knees toppling her to the floor. She must have screamed reflexively for within seconds there were footsteps on the stairs.

"Miss Bennet, are you hurt? What happened?" Darcy moved the trunk and knelt down in its place.

Elizabeth was rubbing her right knee. "Oh I'm fine. I'm sorry to alarm you."

Darcy's countenance changed, he stood and turned. " Miss Bennet I told you that I would carry the trunk down, along with the clothes." He looked down at the trunk, "really this is much to heavy. You should have waited, you could have been seriously hurt." His voice was curt. " Why didn't you wait for me?"

Elizabeth managed to stand up, although her knee still throbbed. She needed a quick excuse.

"I...um I was afraid the must and dust of the attic may not be good for you." Elizabeth rubbed her knee as she spoke.

Darcy turned to face her looking confused. "Not be good for me?"

It was obvious that Elizabeth was in pain, she tried to step forward but winced when she put pressure on her knee. Darcy moved in and grabbed her hand, with his other hand he lightly supported her waist.

He continued his questioning, his tone becoming more defensive, "I don't understand what you mean good for me? Must and dust?"

Elizabeth limped toward the main staircase accepting the support.

"I'm sorry sir, I assumed you had allergies or some distress and thought being up in the attic might exacerbate the problem." Lizzy let out a long sigh when they reached the stairs.

Darcy flushed with anger and embarrassment.

"Miss Bennet if I need a diagnosis I will see a physician. Please do not decide for me what I am and am not capable of." He was speaking in a loud voice but continuing to support Elizabeth gently.

Elizabeth laughed, motivated more out of pain than humor, "Sir I will not presume to diagnose you ever again but may I be so presumptuous as to prescribe myself some ice in my room. I don't think I can make it down the stairs right now."

Darcy, realizing how thoughtless he was behaving, smiled down at her and laughed as well.

"Yes, of course."

They turned and he escorted her to her room.

Chapter V

Posted on Saturday, 10 August 2002

He only let go to open the door to her bedroom, trying to concentrate more on Elizabeth's movement and less on himself. She broke away from his hands, limped to the bed, throwing bits of material to the floor, clearing a little spot for herself.

Darcy watched the pink and white bits fall to the floor as if they were cascading over a waterfall. She was talking but he didn't hear, his eyes and mind were sketching the details. He was arrested with the desire to know it all, the colors, the furniture, the lighting, the scent, the where and why. He turned his head toward her, tapping on a strength that was his only companion.

"Sir, did you hear me? I think I'll be fine. If Mrs. Brown could just bring me some ice."

"Yes...I will fetch her directly." His tone was even and his demeanor calm, detection was impossible save for a slight flutter of the eyelids.

Elizabeth put her head back on the headboard thinking about the plastic bag under the window in the attic. He won't be interested in anything made out of his mother's clothes. He wants to throw them out, forget about the past. The tears burned her eyes and she tried to see past them, force them to stop. "I should do the same, throw it all out." It wasn't just clothes for her, it was the thoughts, the memories that flashed in when she wasn't busy, the images of her mother wasting and her father, looking like he hadn't slept in months. She wiped her eyes feeling selfish. Maybe it's not just the clothes for him either....?

Mrs. Brown's steps were light on the stairs, she guessed that she was being waited upon and had, in the time of descending the first step to touching the floor, formulated the answer to Mr. Darcy's questions, the asked as well as unasked.

He stepped out looking anxious, "How is her knee? Did you tell her I would take her in for X-rays?"

Mrs. Brown patted his arm, "now sir, she's fine. The ice has reduced any swelling and before I left she got up and walked about the room. I did tell her to rest awhile, if that's all right, just to be sure."

"Of course."

She could see that he was not satisfied and it was her confirmation that more had passed between them than a steamer trunk. Elizabeth was not forthcoming either but her tears were clue enough.

Mrs. Brown cautiously added, " yes her knee will be fine...but..."

Darcy's eyes heated, "there is something else?"

"Sir, it's not my place but ...well she is so young and pretty, to be here...alone all the time, working or in her room. I think she maybe lonely or depressed."

Darcy considered the words and how he should respond. He pictured her alone in the little bedroom upstairs, feeling betrayed to know that she wasn't always happy, working away, unencumbered by sadness. Mrs. Brown's suppositions caught him off balance.

"I think that is none of my concern Mrs. Brown. As long as Miss Bennet continues to execute her duties in the same fashion we have no business to inquire into her life." The coolness of his tone had the desired effect on Mrs. Brown and she spoke of the "poor" Miss Bennet no further.

Darcy abandoned the house for the grounds, heading for the north woods, he thought of the first night he had met Miss Bennet, her barefoot, his uptight demeanor, he shuddered at his behavior, that night and for the many subsequent episodes. Is this what I've become? Mrs. Brown said, "Miss Bennet may be depressed." And yet to him she seemed the most lighthearted and warm person he had met in many years. Is she slipping into this self, this light heart, this generous form, and then when she is alone she is her true self? Perhaps this is what I have been doing? I step into Mr. Darcy, hiding behind him, using him.

His meanderings of foot and mind had somehow, impossibly, led him to a fallen cedar tree. It was heavy, but the color and quality were perfect, but how to get it out of the woods and to the garden?

"Havannah", he spoke to the forest.

Steam swirled to the ceiling as Elizabeth checked inside her pot of boiling potatoes. She replaced the lid, satisfied with their progress and moving on to the pile of green apples on the counter. She brought them to the sink in order to core them, "the key to perfect pie is very thinly sliced apples" her mothers voice warmed her as she worked the apples.

"Well we haven't had a white Thanksgiving in such a long time." Mrs. Brown moved next to Elizabeth.

"Who is that?" Elizabeth squinted, trying to focus on a moving figure through the snow.

"I think it's Mr. Darcy on his horse, but they are moving so slowly?"

As the horse and man inched closer it became clear they were dragging something behind, inch by inch they were advancing. The strain on the horse was visible and Mr. Darcy let go of the reins with one hand and patted him gently.

"Elizabeth, do you know what he's up to?"

"I don't have a clue." Looking out with curiosity.

When they reached the garden and turned a bit the cedar log came into view. Darcy jumped from the horse detached the harness and unstrapped the log. The snow was coming down swiftly, covering the log within seconds of it becoming still on the ground.

Elizabeth turned with embarrassment, not wanting to share her delight and gratitude with anyone.

"I have no idea what that boy is up to but I better make some coffee before he leaves to pick up Miss Georgiana." Mrs. Brown shook her head disapprovingly, "Maine, to far away, that little girl should be here. We've got plenty of wonderful schools right out the front door." Elizabeth was use to Mrs. Brown's opinions on everything and usually tuned her out while she busied herself, but when she spoke of the family her interest piqued. There was really so little she knew about her employer, save for a few old photos and some confusing impressions. "I don't think she wanted to leave, poor thing, but then who would know what she wants." She looked over to Elizabeth, lifting the coffee spoon that was filling the pot, "there was something wrong there...I think. Reynolds might have known but she never told me."

Before Elizabeth could respond Darcy came through the door. He had discarded his coat and gloves but water glistened where snowflakes had melted in his hair.

"Do you think that you could stretch your dinner preparations to include three more for the holiday?"

"Oh yes well of course sir, but I should check the table linens." Mrs. Brown plugged in the pot and hurried out to the dining room.

Darcy turned to Elizabeth, smiling at Mrs. Brown's enthusiasm.

"I have invited Charles Bingley and his sister Caroline for the weekend"

"But sir you said three additional guests."

"True...I believe Charles will be bringing a companion with him."

Elizabeth lit up. She knew their relationship had been speeding up a bit but they had no idea they might be spending Thanksgiving together.

Darcy was not disappointed with her reaction. He poured himself some coffee and turned to lean against the counter as he warmed his hands on the mug. Her smile assured him he had done the right thing in calling Charles. He looked down, feeling guilty about how easily Charles accepted his apology, how ready he was to resume their friendship after he had challenged his judgment.

"I see you have found some fallen cedar, hope it wasn't to much for Havanna." Elizabeth sat down to begin peeling apples, overwhelmed by her feelings and unable to look up at him.

"Once the purpose is set, he becomes quite focused on the work...he's a bit older now but his power still surprises me."

"Shall I put some of that coffee in a thermos for your trip? Oh and it's a very long drive, maybe a sandwich." Elizabeth left her apples to search for the thermos she had seen by chance.

"Oh no, please. I'll make do on the rode. I should be off now. The others will be arriving at about 2 tomorrow. We should, if all goes well be back shortly before that."

He turned to leave, wishing their conversation could be more intimate. He was nearly through the door when he heard the words, they were soft but not tentative.

"Be careful."

Chapter VI

Posted on Monday, 30 September 2002

Lizzy shut the lights off in the kitchen, preparing to make her way upstairs, before leaving she crossed to the back window. The garden and most of the stone wall were covered in a crusty snow, the storm had relented hours ago but a bitter cold had set in, draining the last colors of autumn. An arrow shaped shadow pointed out from the cedar log, as if claiming its position, adjacent to the garden.

On her way upstairs she heard the phone ring in the office. She hurried to answer it, fearing for all the travelers.

"Hello."

"Lizzy, are you all right? You sound funny."

"Oh Jane,....I'm fine. Where are you?"

"I'm at Charles' apartment in the city. I'm sorry I didn't have time to call before he made these arrangements. I wanted to check with you first, but it was all very short notice. Evidently, Mr. Darcy or...um William was very insistent on us coming, and since their relationship has been strained lately, I wanted to say yes for Charles' sake."

Jane kept talking but Lizzy hadn't heard anything after the "William". In her excitement over seeing her sister she hadn't thought that Jane would be calling Mr. Darcy, William. The clarity of the situation brought Lizzy down into the desk chair.

She recovered momentarily to assure Jane that she had made the right decision.

"It'll be fine, just pretend it's my house and I can't stop to socialize because, as the hostess, I have far to much to do!" Jane laughed at Lizzy's good nature.

"This is going to be quite a round of pretend for me Lizzy, for to do it justice, I must also imagine that you and Mr. Darcy are husband and wife." Jane laughed with such assuredness that Elizabeth could do nothing else but join in the joke.

"Remember, Jane that I will be at the village craft fair all day Friday. I'm sorry, if I had known about your plans I wouldn't have rented a table."

"Oh don't worry Lizzy. Charles and I will come by to visit you and shop around."

"Great, I think it's going to be fairly nice. They're going to have over 50 artisans. In the flyer it said this was something like the 30th annual craft fair. I guess we'll see."

"Sounds like I better take some more cash out for the weekend."

Lizzy had stood up, feeling better after talking with Jane, and remembered something she had mentioned.

"Jane did you say that Charles and Mr. Darcy were not getting along?"

"Well I'm not sure but about two months ago I was at a party at Caroline's apartment in the city and William came round. Charles and Caroline were giving him a hard time about not getting out enough to socialize. He got really defensive. Then later he and Charles were in the kitchen together for a while when William came out very calmly but with a very glassy look about him, and left the party without a word of goodbye to anyone. I asked Charles several times if they had a fight but he insisted they hadn't. I believed him for a while but then when we didn't see William for a month I asked him again. He still denied any disagreement but this time it was hard to believe. My first impression was that they were the best of friends. I dropped the inquiries because I became suspicious that the fight may have been about me?"

"About you, I don't believe it Jane."

"I don't mean fighting over me I mean that maybe Mr. Darcy does not approve of me for Charles."

"Jane, that's nonsense, you are the most beautiful and loving person I know and I'm sure everyone sees that...even Mr. Darcy."

White birches, scrub pines and maples blurred the side windows of the car as it droned forward. Darcy had no mind for the fall colors, he was determined to collect Georgiana and head back to the house without delay. Despising the idea of wasting time staying over night in a hotel he informed Georgiana that they would be leaving all the earlier on Thanksgiving morning.

The hallways of the Gray Academy dorm rooms were stark and Darcy's heels resounded on the uncarpeted hallway. He knocked on the door gently, hoping Georgiana was not at a late class.

"Come in."

Darcy turned the metal doorknob. Georgiana's back was turned to him. She was sitting on the bed writing notes on a legal pad.

"I think you should add a Who is it? To your 'Come in'"

Georgiana dropped her pad and turned to see her brother standing in the doorway with a smirk on his lips.

"You're early, I still have one class. Oh, maybe you can walk me over?"

Darcy hesitated for a moment than motioned for the door.

"Uh, don't forget your coat, it's turned cold."

Georgiana led the two through the paths of Gray. Darcy took the opportunity to observe his sister from this unfamiliar vantage point. Her blond hair was pulled back at the sides, secured by a bone colored clip, allowing her lightest tones to be exposed. She walked straight up, filling her tailored blue coat to proper proportions. Darcy enjoyed watching her, she wasn't like the other young girls here, she did none of this obnoxious hair twisting, or giggling, she moved calmly along the path, no doubt preparing herself for her class.

"This is it. What will you do while you wait for me?"

"I did bring that trunk for you, perhaps I'll go back and move it into your room."

"Here are my keys. I'll come back after class and we can get some dinner."

They parted and no sooner had Darcy started back on the path than someone called out his name.

"Mr. Darcy"

A woman, looking to be in her late thirties was walking quickly on a path to the left of him, seeming to be coming from the administration building. As she drew closer Darcy recognized her as the Dean of students he had met briefly when he had first come to Gray to enroll Georgiana.

"I don't know if you remember me Mr. Darcy? I'm Dean May. If you have a minute I'd like to speak with you about Georgiana."

Darcy's eyes locked on hers, he tensed the muscles in his neck.

"Certainly." He finally blinked his eyes and followed her back the way she had come.

They made their way to her office on the main floor and seated themselves at a small conference table near the window.

"I must tell you Mr. Darcy that I am very concerned about your sister." Dean May leaned in toward the table.

Darcy studied her face, her hair was short and brown, cropped close to her head, her complexion was smooth with just a hint of tan, left over from some cape vacation. He felt the pseudo sincerity in her voice, what could she know of concern, it would take to much time away from her wardrobe selection.

Staring away from her eyes, focusing on a gold and diamond encrusted dragonfly pin on her suede lapel, he muttered, "Is there some problem with grades?"

They both knew this statement was a throw away.

Dean May shook her head slightly, "No, Mr. Darcy. Georgiana, as you are well aware excels in all her subjects. If she continues here she will undoubtedly be the valedictorian of her class."

His eyes moved from the pin to the window behind her shoulder, "If' she continues?"

"I think Georgiana is very unhappy here. We are coming to the end of November and she hasn't made any real friends, she avoids social situations and parties and even makes a habit of bringing a book to the dining hall."

Darcy observed the last yellow leaf blow from a maple limb, it had started to brown and curl at the edges causing a rocking motion as it floated to the floor.

"I see." Darcy brought his attention back to the table.

"I know that Georgiana had some problem at her old school but I don't know all the particulars. I believe there was a romance involved?"

Darcy put his hand to his head, looking down, trying to compose his feelings. The word romance sickened him.

"Georgiana was taken in by an older and very calculating man. He used his former relationship with my family to gain her trust and then he violated that trust. I assure you there was no 'romance' involved."

Darcy's demeanor conveyed the full weight of his meaning and Dean May shuddered in response.

"She couldn't have been more that 15 years old at the time. I am very sorry. I understand your wariness now but please let me make a suggestion that I think will aid in your sisters recovery."

Darcy turned his head to hold her gaze

"Allow me to place Georgiana with a roommate. I have someone in mind. She is very outgoing but also very motherly. I have been thinking about this match up for awhile and I feel it could be mutually beneficial."

Darcy stroked his right eyebrow, he hated this, Georgiana should be able to handle this alone. She just needed time, room to be alone, maybe a hobby? She certainly didn't need a cloying teenager, imitating her mother and staring at her with sympathetic looks.

"Yes."

Dean May quelled her approval sensing this would annoy Mr. Darcy and instead changed the subject.

" Are you celebrating the holiday in Maine or back home?"

"We will be departing early tomorrow. I really must be going now. Thank you for seeing me."

Darcy rose and left the office.

May swiveled in her chair, looking out on the campus, thankful for her small inroad.

Chapter VII

Posted on Sunday, 20 October 2002

The house was seldom uncomfortably warm, at least not as long as Elizabeth had been employed, but this Thanksgiving morning forced her outside to find a doorstop for the back door. She stepped down the back stoop, pulled her sweater over her chest as a shield to the bitter cold. The frost crunched under her boots as she made her way up to the garden. A small stone, more decorative than supportive would be suitable. She plucked it from the corner and turned.

Darcy and Georgiana had only moments before pulled past the garden towards the garage. They were approaching the door as Elizabeth came forward.

"Oh, sir, you made excellent time. The other guests haven't arrived yet.."

Elizabeth moved closer as she spoke, with two hands on the stone, her sweater had opened to reveal a velvet green blouse, edged with a small ruffle around the neckline.

Darcy set his lips to avoid showing his pleasure.

"Are we to have stone soup today Miss Bennet or shall it be the traditional American Turkey?"

Lizzy remembered her stone, looked down at it then raised her eyes, with a laugh that Darcy was sure curled the wisps of black hair about her face.

She retorted to his tease in kind, "Sir, I assure you, the guests will have turkey."

He hesitated but could not resist the allure of familiarity. "As you see I have luggage in my hand as I enter, may I not be considered a guest in my own home, just for this day?"

Lizzy, delighted by his unusual playfulness, caught his eye for a moment. Darcy broke the moment by opening the door with his free hand, allowing the two ladies to enter.

Sage, turkey, and cranberries scented the air like an earthy perfume. The fatigue Darcy was feeling from the long drive overcame him for a moment and he closed his eyes, allowing the warm steam from the boiling pots to fill his lungs. He exhaled and turned when he felt a sharp breeze prick at the back of his neck. Elizabeth had opened the door slightly and he watched her while she crouched down, fitting the stone in as a door prop.

"William I'm a little tired. I think I'll take a nap before Charles and Caroline arrive."

Lizzy moved around the table toward Georgiana, she had shed her sweater to reveal a longish black skirt, and the rest of her green velvet peasant blouse.

"Would you like a cup of tea before you retire?" She posed her question to both.

Darcy was beginning to feel uncomfortably warm, for more reasons than the cooking. He was the first to decline.

"No thank you, I will take this luggage up to Georgiana's room and then I must check on the horses. I hope to ride out before supper."

Georgiana agreed to the tea and promised to be back down after changing. Elizabeth stirred the cranberry sauce and put the tea on to boil.

"Well I've set the table and all your potatoes and turnips are precooked and inside the fridge waiting to be heated." Mrs. Brown bustled into the kitchen from the dining room. "You've made the apple tart and I made the pumpkin and mince. Are you sure you'll be all right with the gravy dear?" Mrs. Brown looked deep into Lizzy's eyes as if she could predict her gravy prowess from her expression.

Lizzy laughed as she tied her apron around her waist, "I assure you Mrs. Brown everything is in hand. I watched my mother make gravy many many times and then eventually had to take over for her. Please don't worry."

"Remember Pryce won't come over for dinner until you fetch him. He'll think he's getting in the way and probably start heating up some soup for himself around 5, so you have to go over for him before then."

"I won't forget. Now you must go and enjoy your own family." Lizzy finally shooed her out.

When Mrs. Brown had gone Lizzy went into the dining room to look at the place settings. She had put out the Royal Doulton service. A good choice Lizzy thought, elegant but pretty. She hesitated for a moment, thinking about whether to put one more finishing touch on the table, whether it would be appropriate or not. She decided to take a chance, thinking it would match perfectly with the plates. In the bottom drawer of the dry bar near the front window she removed a handmade table runner she had stitched together, after admiring the service displayed in the china cabinet. The center panel was quilted in a pattern called the mariner's compass. Slivers of cranberry, tan, moss green and pale yellow cotton pieces were sewn into a circular compass rose. A tan, linen look, material flanked the compass and was hand quilted with a subtle wave pattern. The edge panels were green velvet that came to a point on either end, with a single green tassle, attached at the point. After rearranging the glasses and making sure all was perfect she headed back to the kitchen.

"Miss Bennet, I wanted to show you what I've been working on."

Georgiana was seated at the kitchen table, two teacups had been set out and the teapot sat between them.

Lizzy approached, feeling a little uncomfortable. Georgiana pulled a plastic bag towards her, that was also sitting on the table. She carefully removed a lavender 14x14 inch panel. When she unfolded the material Lizzy let out a breath of amazement. Georgiana had made a miniature schoolhouse quilt, using lavender, dark purple, green check and yellow patches.

"This is very good. Miniatures are quite difficult but you have lined up everything perfectly. How is it that you have caught on so quickly?"

"I took some books out of the library and found a wonderful store within walking distance of Gray. The women were so helpful."

Lizzy took the piece into her hands and studied it more closely.

"If you have some time over the holiday I could help you put a backing on this with some batting inside and some hand quilting on the edges. I think this would make a wonderful pillow."

Georgiana was very pleased put her teacup down and said, "I'm free Friday evening."

Lizzy slipped the panel back inside the bag and thought about the craft fair, no doubt she was going to be tired but she didn't want to discourage Georgiana's enthusiasm.

"Friday evening will be fine. And now I must tend to my meal or we will all be having stone soup for dinner"

Elizabeth took out some dough from the fridge, taped wax paper to the kitchen table, and gathered extra flour and a wooden rolling pin.

"Let me clear the teacups for you." Georgiana cleared the table while Elizabeth set to flouring and rolling out her dough.

"Have you ever made biscuits?" The question was innocent but not well thought out by Lizzy. As soon as she asked she realized it was inappropriate.

"Many times. Mrs. Reynolds always let me help her in the kitchen on holidays, as long as my father hadn't invited any business guests. Georgiana turned, scrunched up her face, looking like a wise gnome and began to recite, "my dear, biscuits are good for no one if you work the dough to vigorously, it will rebel against your rule and become tough and mean. A nice biscuit is achieved with a light touch, just a bit of shaping, then leave the darlings to themselves, they know what to do."

Elizabeth was impressed not only by Georgiana's uncanny imitation of Mrs. Reynolds but also that she would allow Lizzy to see it.

"I hope I can live up to those biscuits?" Elizabeth laughed while she moved to start placing them on a cook sheet. She was feeling, all of a sudden, acutely aware that this would be the first holiday without Mrs. Reynolds cooking the meal and overseeing the day.

"Have you heard from Mrs. Reynolds since she retired?"

"No actually I haven't. I have asked my brother several times for the address but he has forgotten to give it to me...He did promise to take me for a visit at Christmas time."

Lizzy noticed that Georgiana seemed very bothered by this line of questioning and decided to drop the whole subject, when the girl looked up, almost near tears.

"You know I never got to say goodbye properly. William insisted that I not come home early from school and so I missed seeing her here for the last time."

Elizabeth had gently placed the last biscuit in place, she turned to face Georgiana, while wiping her hands on her apron, she walked toward the girl, silently moving to her side and placing her arm around her shoulder, noticing the thinness contrasting with her more full figure, it was difficult to pull the girl into her body to properly console her. She accepted the affection but was unnatural in her response.

"Now I am sure that you will have a lovely Christmas visit with Mrs. Reynolds and I don't see any reason why you couldn't get started on a little quilt project for her after we finish this one."

"Oh yes", she raised her head, pulled her hair behind her ears, "I think she would like that."

Elizabeth removed her arm and walked to retrieve her cookie sheet for the oven. " I think your brother has plans to ride out. Do you plan to join him?"

"Yes, I should get ready." Georgiana gathered her quilt and headed out, but stopped at the door. "Elizabeth,....thank you."

Lizzy did not respond verbally but smiled to show her feelings.

Darcy dressed in his riding clothes quickly, only stopping to retrieve his inhaler from the bathroom, he shoved it down into his pocket and left for the stable. Once outside, the chilled air was sharp on the intake and he reached for the blue inhaler. His mind turned to Elizabeth as he held his breath, allowing the medicine to penetrate. He reviewed her image as if he had a slide projector in his mind, freeze frames of moments he had been alone with her, the newest was in the kitchen this afternoon. The green velvet, the gray stone, the black wool skirt, dark colors and grainy textures floated around her luminous complexion, heightening its impact. He took his second puff, almost immediately feeling relief.

How was this day going to turn out, he mused, as his strides became longer. Elizabeth seems well at ease, scurrying about the kitchen, intent on surrounding everyone with comfort, but how will she feel when Jane arrives as my guest and worse yet as Caroline Bingley's friend. The tension of the situation did not cloud his happiness, in fact, the thought of everyone being home for the holiday save for Mrs. Reynolds was buoying up his spirits. Georgiana's experience with George Wickham last year had increased his awareness to just how solitary he was, with no one to discuss his management of this tragedy he became acutely aware of both his loneliness and, an old and most repulsive feeling of insecurity.

He stepped into the stable, the warm smell of animals and hay struck Darcy between the eyes. He was transported back to his childhood. He could see himself walking toward the stable, bundled up in a blue pea coat, red scarf and brown knit ski hat, he had made it out to the stable from his room and leaned on the wall to catch his breath. Thanksgiving had always been centered around horseback riding at the Darcy home, because his parents came originally from England they used it more for a holiday to entertain friends. The morning had the same crisp chill, just the same amount of frost. The boy appeared pale, a twinge of blue colored his lips like a washed out watercolor. A voice resounded in his mind as the boy struggled to make his way toward the stalls. "He doesn't like riding, that's why he is unwell. He knows this is my favorite time of the year and he's just trying to spite me. Spoiled! Spoiled to the point of inducing some illness just to get out of things. Disgusting. I won't stand for it." He had heard his father's voice up in his room that morning, he laid in his bed willing himself to level his breathing, and desperately trying to convince himself that he would be well enough to ride that afternoon.

Reynolds had come up to check on him and refill the humidifier. He had asked her if all the company was out.

"Yes dear, they'll be halfway to the woods by now." Reynolds turned to leave but then looked back, "you'll ride next year, I'm sure of it. I reminded your father before he left that you had done some wonderful jumps at your practice last month. He seemed very pleased indeed. He said to make sure you get plenty of rest so that you may come down for dinner this evening." The boy smiled at her, realizing, even at the young age of 10 that Reynolds was good to the bone, all the while knowing perfectly well that she was lying to spare his feelings.

Foolishly thinking the fresh air may help his situation he slipped out to the stable, making his way, losing energy with every step. Darcy watched the boy drag himself to Chestnut, his mother's little mare. He untied the ropes and managed, by some miracle to ride him out of the stable. Darcy looked out to the old garden field while the boy cantored toward the woods, hanging round the horse's neck. He put his head down and turned before he saw him slip off, falling between the drooping stalks of withered sunflowers.

Jane knocked softly on the kitchen door before entering.

"Lizzy, it's so good to see you." The two sisters embraced.

Jane stepped back to view her sister. "Lizzy, I haven't seen you look so good in a long while."

"Oh...I may have shed a few pounds, before the cold snap I had been doing quite a bit of heavy gardening. Although with the holidays upon me I had better watch myself. Tell me, how is Mr. Bingley? And dare I say his sister?"

"Charles is wonderful."

"And?" Lizzy raised her eyebrows, expecting more."

"And, well....his sister is very difficult." Jane had lowered her voice but a smirk played on her lips and that made Elizabeth relieved. Jane was taking Caroline in stride and not letting herself get flustered. She admired her sister's easygoing way with people.

The ladies looked up from their quiet tęte-ŕ-tęte when Bingley walked in the kitchen. He moved towards Jane and placed his arm on her back.

"Elizabeth," he tried out her first name cautiously, but after seeing no reaction from her he proceeded with confidence. "I t is wonderful to see you. The dining room is looking very elegant this afternoon.

Lizzy knew why Jane had succumbed to Charles' charms, he took time to notice all the little details and niceties that women took such pleasure in. Mr. Darcy on the other hand did not have that social grace, or familial, thought Lizzy. It was so obvious that Georgiana was completely miserable half the time and it seemed that he never gave it a second thought.

"Do you know where Darcy has gone off to. I have searched his usual haunts about the house but it seems he has decided to spirit about the grounds."

Jane and Lizzy laughed at the image of Darcy as a ghost, because they were sisters they had conjured up almost an identical picture of the Master himself, black riding boots, black turtleneck, riding crop indeterminately whipping through the air, looking translucent, eternally bound to walk in strides without a destination.

"I believe he wants to ride out before supper. I think you'll find him out at the stable, helping to prepare the horse."

"Will you ride Jane? Or perhaps you would like to visit with your sister for awhile?"

"Oh Jane, please ride out. I'm busy here and besides we can visit tomorrow at the craft fair."

Jane agreed and Elizabeth found a few moments alone in the house to check on all the last minute preparations. While crossing through the foyer to the Library she heard some music from the parlour, or what Darcy called the music room although no one ever played any instruments.

She entered and saw Georgiana quite lost in a beautiful piece that she recognized was by DeBussy. Elizabeth stayed by the door until she had finished.

"Georgiana your playing is lovely. I have never heard you before."

"Yes I haven't much felt like playing lately."

Elizabeth sat down beside her and began to play. She laughed as her fingers reacquainted with the keys. All she could remember from her 5 years of lessons were a few worn out Christmas tunes and a couple of show favorites.

"You play very well Elizabeth."

"You are much to kind."

"Excuse me but if I could interrupt this little concert I need your housekeeper."

Caroline had walked in, unbeknownst to the ladies.

"Would you be so kind and mend these riding pants for me quickly Miss Bennet, you see the small tear there. I'm afraid they might rip further on the ride. William is very insistent we keep up with him and sometimes he is in a mood to put us through our pace. I think he enjoys challenging me, he knows I don't get all the exercise that I should."

Elizabeth could not help think Mr. Darcy might be actually trying to lose Miss Bingley on these energetic rides, but she suppressed the smile and dutifully moved towards the pants. She ran upstairs with them, knowing she could zip them off on the sewing machine.

Darcy came in, looking perturbed and saw Elizabeth disappearing up to her room, turning he saw Caroline at the opening to the music room and thought something might be up.

"Caroline, have you seen my sister? I'd like to ride out before supper. I don't want to interfere with the timing Miss Bennet has planned."

Caroline furrowed her brow and could not remember William ever worrying over anyone's timing for anything.

"Look no further, she is here playing the piano."

"She is?" Darcy moved inside the room his formality had disintegrated when he saw her seated at the piano. They stared at each other for a moment, acknowledging the significance.

"I don't want to interrupt you but we must get a move on if we are to ride out."

Georgiana conceded, not wanting to interfere with her brother's obsession.

"Yes I'm coming just now...Did you know that Miss Bennet plays the piano?" The question escaped without much regard to reason. She was curious how well he knew her.

"I had no idea." He turned seemingly uninterested in the information. They were all passing through the foyer when Elizabeth rushed out and down the stairs. Darcy watched her descend and noticed she had a small locket about her throat that had not been there this morning.

"Your pants Miss Caroline. I'm sorry it should have been quicker but my machine jammed and I had to do it by hand instead."

"Well I certainly hope they'll stay together while I'm riding."

Elizabeth put her head down, trying to control her tongue but failed... "I'm sure the stitches will hold through riding but I wouldn't put them through the test of supper."

Darcy let a laugh escape before he could check himself, but he quickly recovered and diverted everyone's attention. "It seems we will not have any time to ride if we stand here much longer. Shall we ladies." He motioned to proceed. Caroline disappeared to change and Georgiana set off a bit ahead of her brother.

Darcy, in the moment before he exited turned to Elizabeth, she looked up at him, with eyes half closed, waiting for a harsh lecture on the propriety that was needed when dealing with his guests.

Instead of a rebuke he looked down and very quietly said, "I see we must add to your talents, comedian.....oh and I hear piano player as well."

Elizabeth took a moment to comprehend his meaning.

"I feel that these two talents are not my most flattering." She put her head down, embarrassed by her lack of self control.

Darcy had not anticipated her reaction and knew she was misunderstanding his meaning.

"Sometimes opportunities to practice new talents arise at odd moments but I think spontaneity lends an attractive quality to those times."

Elizabeth was confused and began to blush, unsure and uncomfortable with this familiar situation.

"Thank you." She turned and said, " I must finish up in the kitchen."

They parted on new ground and both were insecure about their footing.

Chapter VIII

Posted on Thursday, 14 November 2002

Elizabeth looked out the kitchen window, billowy gray clouds floated high above the back woods. Usually her favorite part of the day, 4 o'clock, when the sun's angle ignited the trees, painting them in a red orange glow, instead were now only a muted purple. She expected the riding party back any moment and so opened the oven to lift out the Turkey, allowing time for it to rest.

Who would carve? Mr. Darcy? She hadn't thought. Her father had always done the carving. She shook her head in memory of him sharpening the blade on the carving knife. Guests always looked a bit frightened at his intensity but she and her sister had relished in this Thanksgiving tradition, possibly because they knew his true nature to be so gentle and loving and they delighted in watching the guests looking a bit terrified. Lizzy wondered if he knew he was in one quarter, giving such pleasure, and in another quarter, his guests, such fear...probably not, that was what she most loved about him.

The back door opened abruptly and Darcy stuck his head in, careful not to step in with his dirty riding boots on.

"We are back from our ride and will be changing for dinner directly, we should be down within the half hour.... " He hesitated and then added, " Is that acceptable?"

Lizzy looked up from her Turkey, thinking about that first dinner she had served him a dinner, salvaged from the floor. "I believe that will be perfect timing. Would you like to carve or shall I make a go of it?"

" I will carve."

She turned to him and simply said, "good."

The party of guests assembled in the library, Darcy had just lit a fire while Charles poured cocktails for everyone. Caroline twirled the olive in her martini and came to stand by the fire.

"William I wish you'd take me up on my offer to help you redecorate. You need to put your own mark on the house."

Darcy placed his wine on the mantle and knelt down to stoke the fire.

"You're mistaken Caroline, the house has made its mark on me."

Caroline laughed, dismissing his comment as a quip.

"I think I'll check with Miss Bennet on dinner."

"Oh yes of course, Miss Bennet." Caroline smiled as he left the room, hiding her disgust.

Darcy entered the kitchen eyeing Elizabeth at the stove, sleeves rolled up, whisk in hand.

"Miss Bennet, we will move into the dining room if you are ready for us now."

Elizabeth turned to tell Mr. Darcy that he could bring the turkey out to be carved, but caught a glance at the clock.

"Oh my gosh. It's five, he's opening the soup." She handed Darcy the whisk, grabbed her sweater and ran for the door. "I'll be right back, don't worry, just stir." Lizzy made a whisking motion with her hand just before she stepped out the door.

Darcy stared at the door for a moment, whisk extended in the air, confused about what just happened. He thought, perhaps she had lost her senses, stressed maybe from all this work. Did she forget something? On the stove, behind him, something was bubbling. He turned to see a tan liquid sizzling inside a roasting pan. He remembered his directions and started to stir, but things were not going well, the liquid seemed to be disappearing. He looked around for help and spotted a bottle of wine on top of the stove, he added a bit and things seemed better.

"Here we are, it's warmer in here." Elizabeth stepped up into the kitchen with Pryce following behind her.

Darcy knew now where she had gone. He watched as she stepped around the old man, gently coaxing him to the table and propping him up with her energy.

"Sir, you have done an admirable job on such short notice." She smiled and reached for the whisk.

"I think the wine saved me from disaster." He looked down at her.

"Drinking or adding?" Lizzy teased him tentatively, unsure of his mood and hoping he was understanding of her disappearance.

He laughed out loud. "Adding, I assure you. Charles has taken care of the cocktails."

"Oh I had not seen you there Master Darcy." Pryce immediately rose from the table, with considerable stiffness. Darcy noticed how diminished he looked.

"Yes Pryce, Happy Thanksgiving." Darcy turned to Elizabeth, wanting very much to be gone from this scene, ashamed by his revulsion of Pryce's ever increasing infirm, " I am ready. I'll take the Turkey out with me."

"Very good, sir"

He set the turkey down on the table, knowing the guests would make their way in upon smelling the scent. As he began carving he noticed the center of the table and the quilted runner.

"Something is drawing me in to this room?" Charles entered with Jane beside him. "I think your sister has outdone herself."

Jane laughed, knowing that Charles was the only one who could refer to Elizabeth as her sister and as the housekeeper/cook and feel comfortable with the situation.

Caroline was the last to enter the dining room, just as Elizabeth was coming in from behind Darcy's chair with a heavy tray of bowls and gravy. She set her tray down on the dry bar and began placing the soup out at everyone's place.

"Elizabeth I know you must have made the centerplace, it's so beautiful does it have a name?" Georgiana questioned.

Elizabeth had not wanted attention to be drawn to her during the meal but she could see now that putting the runner on the table had been a mistake.

"Oh yes, it's called a mariner's compass." Lizzy finished passing out the soup and was making her way toward the kitchen when she heard Caroline.

"I find it so amusing that some people think that just because you are on a certain level you will be interested in sailing and all things maritime."

Jane glanced at William and he met her eyes in a moment of understanding.

Elizabeth had heard her and chided herself for feeling so comfortable when she knew it was all so impossible.

Darcy started to carve the turkey quietly as the others conversed.

"I feel fortunate that my father was not an avid sportsmen. I think those types go overboard with their sons sometimes. I remember a chap at boarding school living in total fear when his team hadn't won. I mean it was a real nightmare for him." Charles had tried to turn Caroline's intended cut into dinner conversation, hoping that Jane had not felt the full impact.

Caroline, foolish as she was, continued without hesitation.

"Well that may be true but where is that boy now. I can assure he's the head of a firm, a successful lawyer....a professional in one manner or other because his father did not give up on him. I think the problem with the world today is that no one is pushing people on, everyone accepts their life and then scorns everyone else who is in a better position later."

Darcy slid slices of turkey onto a platter and handed it to Georgiana for her to begin passing it round. Elizabeth had returned and was silently pouring water into glasses. Jane, Charles and Darcy each held their breath, hoping this would be the end of a poor subject when a voice came from the head of the table, next to Darcy.

"I think many of those boys would have been much better left alone, you are correct, I believe, in your assumption that they are 'professionals' but my fear is that is all they are, motivated by fear and competition they have ruined many lives including, in some cases, their own.

All eyes had rested on Georgiana when she rose, let her napkin fall from her lap and went out through the kitchen door. Darcy feared she was thinking about Wickham and excused himself to follow her.

She ran past Pryce and out through the back door, she made it up the hill, near the cedar log and completely broke down. Darcy was by her side within seconds.

" Georgiana, what is it? Why are you so upset?" He asked desperately. "Don't pay attention to Caroline, she has motives for everything she says and none of them make any sense." Georgiana had turned to him, unable to look up.

"Please tell me what is it? I can't help if you won't tell me?" There was a touch of anger in his voice now. He felt that he was at the end of a long rope that had stretched to a fray.

"We have all these guests, Miss Bennet has worked all day. You are making a scene."

" It's you! You are the one I was thinking of."

She looked up and saw the recognition pinch at the corner of his eyes. He caught his anger and covered his instinct to withdraw.

"Yes....yes I see what you mean. Lets go inside and finish dinner and we can discuss all my shortcomings." He laughed gently and hugged her.

"Wait William there's something else. It's about Elizabeth."

"What is it?"

"It feels very strange to have Jane here as our guest while Elizabeth is serving the entire dinner and not joining us."

"Yes, I agree but I think that Miss Bennet would be more uncomfortable to sit down in the middle of her job. Dinner will be over soon and it won't seem so strained. Let's go in now so we don't have to extend it any longer."

Jane had left her place at the table, joining Elizabeth in the kitchen.

"What is happening?"

"I'm as confused as you are Jane. The only thing that seems very clear is that we don't know the whole story."

"What story?"

"I believe something must have happened to Georgiana, either recently or in the past that has upset her so deeply and profoundly that she has become disconnected."

"Have their been other incidents before today?" Jane asked worriedly.

"Yes, just this morning in the kitchen. At first I thought she was missing Mrs. Reynolds, but now I'm sure it's more."

As the sisters stood closely conversing Darcy and Georgiana walked back in the kitchen.

"Miss Bennet, we are sorry for the delay. May we continue with this delicious meal?"

Lizzy turned round to see brother and sister arm in arm. The expression on Darcy's face was serene, as if everything had been smoothed over but Elizabeth was suspicious that this display was part of the underlying problem.

"Yes of course. I knew you had just stepped out for some fresh air and so I took the liberty of placing all the dishes out. Everything is ready and waiting." Lizzy smiled warmly at both of them.

William nodded his head at Elizabeth, relieved and grateful for her words.

The rest of the dinner proceeded much more quietly and after dessert the guests began to wander into the music room with their coffee. Caroline had seated herself at the piano and was entertaining everyone with some classical music. Elizabeth began quietly clearing the dishes tracing back the events of the evening.

Darcy entered the dining room and crossed to the dry bar. Elizabeth had set out a tray of liquers to bring into the music room. He poured himself a brandy and turned, resting back on the dry bar.

"What does the compass signify?"

Elizabeth, still holding a pile of dishes, put her head down and smiled.

"I hadn't intended it to signify anything actually. I'm ashamed to say I just thought it would look nice with the China." They looked at each other and laughed.

Darcy took a sip of his drink, settling back and crossing his legs. Elizabeth looked over, anticipating where the conversation might go.

"I was wondering if you might like to join us for a drive north and then maybe some dinner out tomorrow, you've worked so hard today and I thought you might like to spend some time with your sister. I'm sure Jane and Charles will come along and of course Georgiana.

Elizabeth continued collecting the silverware, moving around the table, dismantling each place setting.

"That's very kind of you but I think I mentioned to you that I'm not available tomorrow because I'm in a craft fair in the village."

"Oh yes of course." Darcy had no recollection of this but tried to sound nonplussed.

"I'm afraid Jane is also coming... as well as Mr. Bingley" Lizzy smiled sheepishly, realizing she was foiling his plans.

"....and possibly Georgiana." Darcy finished her thought with good humor.

"Oh, it seems I've ruined all your plans."

"No....no." Darcy's voice was a bit throaty.

Elizabeth had made her way to the place setting directly in front of him and he straightened up to let her continue.

"Perhaps you'd like to come along." He saw her shoulders shake a bit from giggling.

"Miss Bennet, you think that I would not attend a craft fair."

Lizzy was desperately trying to suppress her amusement at the thought of Mr. Darcy at a village craft fair.

"Miss Bennet , just what are you implying? Darcy mocked lightly.

Elizabeth had come full circle around the table, she stood, leaning against Darcy's chair.

"I think of these delights a little goes a long way." Lizzy turned her eyes toward the table runner. Darcy laughed and nodded in agreement.

Chapter IX

Posted on Sunday, 24 November 2002

Three rows of white tents supported by metal frames ran the length of the village square. There was activity in almost all of them, there was a hum about the activity that comforted Lizzy while she set her own booth up. She used the table to display, runners, placemats, small purses and a new item she had this year, a quilted cell phone holder.

Next to the table were several quilt stands she had lugged from the house, to show off he bedspreads and wall hangings. There were two she was most proud of this year, one she was sure would sell today, it was a wedding ring quilt she had done in earth tones, a departure for this type of pattern, but knowing that quite a few people would be coming from the city, she thought it might not be a pastel kind of crowd.

The other large piece was a wall hanging done in a three dimensional cube design, a block print, using sky blue, dark blue calico and black with a hand quilted white background. She had miscalculated the amount of dark blue and black needed so used the leftovers to make a quilted jacket. The blue and black patches complimented her hair and eyes and she was pleased after all with her mistake. Unfortunately, the jacket was more for looks than warmth and even though she had layered it had turned particularly raw.

At around 12:30 Lizzy was coming back from a break, they had opened the town hall for restrooms and refreshments, and just to warm up a bit. The crowd had been steadily increasing since 10 am, and she had almost missed him, but his height had won out over everyone. She recognized the shape of his hair, moving slowly up the constructed lane of tables.

"Well, this is something now." Lizzy whispered to herself.

She quickly put away what she had been working on, not wanting to spoil the surprise and took up a chenille scarf she was knitting for Jane.

Georgiana, being a full head and shoulders shorter than her brother had been walking next to him all the while.

"Elizabeth."

Lizzy looked up when the young girl made recognition and started her way over. She saw Mr. Darcy, walking slightly behind, hands in his long black coat, being more buoyed up by the crowd then walking of his own volition.

Elizabeth stood up to greet them.

"Hi, I wasn't sure if anyone was coming, it has turned so cold today."

Darcy said nothing but could not help himself from staring at Elizabeth.

"You have worn your hair down today, it looks so different all around your shoulders, it's longer than I had thought." Georgiana commented.

"Yes, I really need to get it cut but I've been so busy lately."

Georgiana began looking over all the things on the table. Elizabeth moved around to watch her, not above being gratified by her reactions.

Darcy moved a bit closer to her, standing at her side.

"There are quite a few excellent craftspeople here, the pottery is quite well done."

Darcy looked down, hoping to alleviate Elizabeth's obvious embarrassment.

"Oh I've seen the pottery. I love the brown and dark green vases." Georgiana turned to face Darcy and Elizabeth. "How have you found the time to make so many things?"

Lizzy had no quick answer. In the moment before she spoke she scanned the work that had been done over the past few months and it made her sick, the piles of baby blankets, so delicately constructed, adorned with ribbons and lace, the table runners, placemats and napkins weighed upon her like a lingering cough.

She shivered slightly, feeling the cold that until now she had only spoke of, "I had not realized until now just how much there was."

"Miss Bennet, would you like some coffee? I saw a stand a few tables back?" Darcy offered.

"Yes, I'd love some coffee. Here let me get my purse."

Darcy waved his hand and was on his way before she could make her way round the table.

"Oh look there's Jane and Charles." Georgiana waved to get their attention.

"Elizabeth you must be freezing out here. We must get you something warm to drink?" Charles, it seemed to Elizabeth never let any attention go unnoticed. She wondered how much better Georgiana would be if he was her brother instead of Darcy.

"Thank you, but Mr. Darcy has just gone to find some coffee for us."

Charles nodded in approval. "Your work is very nice. You have an eye for color combinations, not all so obvious." Charles looked over all the items on the table, unsure if it would be appropriate to buy something.

"Well thank you. Jane, have you looked around yet?"

"No, but I see a lot of things I like." The sisters laughed together.

"In the next aisle, across from the hats is a jewelry tent, definitely stop there. His settings are really beautiful, they're kind of masculine and feminine at the same time. I think he has a shop in the city called 'extrusions'. I believe the name has something to do with metal work."

"Can't wait to check it all out." Jane caught Lizzy's eye and glanced at Georgiana, remembering her episode at dinner the other night. Lizzy nodded slightly, expressing that all seemed calm for the moment.

"Georgiana would you like to join us and walk around for a while?" Jane hoped to draw her out a bit, away from her brother, leaving him for another job.

"Uh.... I think I should wait..."

"Oh Darcy can catch up with us...or not." Charles smiled ruefully, confident that all present knew the degree with which his friend was interested in such a venue.

Georgiana laughed and set off with Jane and Bingley.

Lizzy took her place, back behind the table, taking up her scarf she began knitting but stopped, questioning herself where she had found all the time, and why she wasn't doing other things.

"I had to wait for a new pot." Darcy handed Lizzy her coffee. Elizabeth got up from her chair.

"Thanks, this is great." She wrapped her hands around the cup, raising her shoulders, trying to warm up.

Darcy looked out at the crowds, pretending not to look her way but all the while using his peripheral vision to capture every nuance.

"How long does this go on?"

"Till 5"

Darcy could not help thinking this was a very torturous way to freeze to death. He took a full view of Elizabeth when he saw her looking in the opposite direction. She was wearing a striking deep blue jacket, cropped short, a pair of jeans and brown boots. The blue of the jacket complimented her dark hair. She seemed thinner than he had thought, perhaps it was the youthful clothes and the hair.

"Have you sold much?" He shuddered at the lameness of his conversation, but the easiness of last night seemed to have drained away.

"No, I don't think quilts are in this year."

"Not even the cell phone holders?" Darcy looked up, trying not to laugh.

"No not even those." Lizzy laughed at herself.

They remained silent after that, watching the crowds and sipping their coffee until Darcy excused himself, saying that he would catch up with Charles, Jane and his sister.

He had pretended to be interested in the blown glass next door but as he fingered the delicate edges of the opaque vases he became engrossed in their movements across the way.

He noticed Georgiana almost immediately, crouching so intensely over whatever was on the table, so innocent in her articulation. Then of course there was the brother, Darcy, standing off to the side, dismissive of everything that had not sprouted from his furrowed brow. He shifted his weight, catching the shadow afforded by the draping tent, watching the scene of brother and sister play out like a child's puppet show. But what is this? A new character has been added to the 'Grim' classic, an interloper in the midst of their strange marriage. Ah, she is very pretty, but it's more than looks and figure, she moves with joy and spontaneity...with determination she could alter the future....I think not.

When William had left he saw this as a chance to intercede.

"I admire your work. The quality of the handstitching is fine and the earthy colors you've chosen give a different feel to some of these classic designs."

Elizabeth sat forward, interest piqued by the idea of a man noticing her work, not that some men hadn't passed compliments but to hear such particular comments over the very details she had so carefully prepared was gratifying.

"Thank you, most men wouldn't have noticed the details you've seen."

"I admit, I have a special interest in paintings and so it must transfer over naturally to handcrafts. In fact, I've been considering an exhibit at my gallery in the city, showcasing some local craftspeople," he motioned to take his wallet out but then seemed to make a judgment in his mind and abandoned the idea, "but I'm sure you wouldn't be interested." He ended, breaking his voice in a note somewhere between a question and a resolution.

Elizabeth, warmed by his quiet self effacing manner felt no trepidation in taking the offer seriously.

"I might be interested in a show, if the time fit into my schedule." She smiled and continued to trace the features in his face, noticing a smile on his lips that was being controlled so as not to be presumptuous.

"Let me give you my card, it has my gallery address, phone number, e-mail and fax. When I secure all the dates and spacing requirements I'll e-mail you, in the meantime perhaps you could send me some slides of your work or if you have digital photos." He handed her the card. "You can give me your e-mail or number when you send the pictures." He offered this last part with nonchalance, careful not to expose his enthusiasm.

Lizzy nodded, accepting all that he proposed and thanking him with involuntary ease.

He thanked her for her time and said he hoped everything might work out, then before turning to leave he allowed himself one probing question.

"I suppose I should ask if your schedule would allow a weekend or weekday show more readily?"

"Oh I work at an estate nearby with another woman, so I have the ability to take time off."

"Wonderful, I look forward to hearing from you." He left, meandering down the aisle.

Elizabeth continued on, selling a few items, but on the whole having a poor sales day. The sun was waning and by this time she had assumed her sister and the rest had taken refuge in a restaurant for a long leisurely lunch and then returned home.

Exhausted from the cold and the tedium of sitting Elizabeth dragged her boxes up to the back kitchen door, trying to discreetly transfer everything back to her room. When she came back in after retrieving the last few items she was met by Georgiana at the door.

"I have not forgotten our date for this evening. Let me just bring a few of these things upstairs and I'll be right back." Lizzy smiled, hoping that Georgiana wouldn't sense her fatigue.

"Are you sure you're not tired? It was a long day." Georgiana picked up one of the quilt racks and began walking with her towards the door.

Lizzy to tired to object, just nodded her head and said, "No."

They moved everything and decided on tea before tackling the pillow making. Darcy found them in the kitchen standing near the stove, deep in discussion. He saw the sewing materials on the kitchen table and was disappointed at the thought of spending a lonely evening in the Library.

"Georgiana, I think Miss Bennet is tired from her event." Elizabeth laughed to herself that Darcy could only bring himself to call what she did today an 'event'.

"Oh I'm fine, I was sitting pretty much the whole time anyway."

"Well...I've made a fire in the library, at least bring your things in there so you can warm up properly, you may use my table for whatever you need to do." He turned to look at the table.

Elizabeth was willing to help Georgiana with her quilt but she was to worn out to tangle with Charles' sister, although it would be nice to relax with Jane.

"I...uh...don't think ...well we might be in the way of all your guests."

Darcy knew what she was thinking. "Jane, Charles and Caroline have gone out to see a movie, they won't be back till later."

"The fire does sound good. Can I bring you some tea as well, sir?"

"Yes, thank you"

Darcy turned, quieted by the idea that he could position himself to watch and listen to Elizabeth for an uninterrupted two hours. He hoped only that all their thread broke and all their stitches had to be reinforced.

He retrieved the newspaper from the hall, and headed for the library to clear his writing table for the girls to work on.

They entered, crossing the room, Elizabeth set the tea on Darcy's side table and started pouring. Georgiana sat down at her brothers table and began spreading out her pieces of material.

"Here, Mr. Darcy." Lizzy handed him his cup and wondered why he was not in his usual wingchair but seated at one end of the brown leather sofa.

He laid his newspaper aside to accept the tea. "Thank you. I think we are cheating you out of your day off today Miss Bennet." He smiled, hoping to draw her into conversation.

"Oh I've had a very full day, she thought briefly of the man that invited her to be in his gallery show."

Admiring her black silk hair, he searched for another question to keep her in his close view. "Did you sell much?"

Elizabeth, a little surprised over his interest, hesitated. "....a few things, but not as much as I would have liked." Not wanting to sound depressing she added, "But I did get an offer to be in a gallery show."

"Perhaps that will help sales?" He tried to cheer her a bit, realizing he should have bought something.

"Maybe."

"Elizabeth I think this table is to small, I'm going to spread it out on the floor. Do you mind if we sit on the floor?"

"No, it's okay." She lied, but wanted to please Georgiana and so agreed, turning she kneeled down, crossing her legs Indian style, now just a foot or two from Darcy's feet.

The two women conferred on the borders for the pillow, choosing a deep red material. They pinned the sides, leaving the sewing machine sections for later. They worked like this for a solid half hour, the younger watching the older. They only lifted their heads when they heard a "Hmmm..." behind them.

"Are you stuck William." Georgiana winked at Lizzy.

"Yes."

Elizabeth turned to look over her shoulder and surmised that he was doing the crossword.

"Seven letter word for mythological weaver?"

"Oh, Arachne...I think?" Elizabeth offered.

"Yes...how about a four letter word for cut on the..."

"Cut on the..." Elizabeth knew the answer but waited, thinking Georgiana might give it a try.

"bias?" she quickly added.

"Yes, very good."

Lizzy, feeling the effects of the long day rested back on the sofa.

"Elizabeth how did you learn to sew and cook?"

Lizzy smiled at Georgiana, thinking about how young she was at her age. "My mother taught me over the years, she was wonderful, not so much for quilting though she was more a seamstress, before she married my father she designed and created costumes for the theater." Lizzy shuddered from a chill she hadn't been able to shake since the afternoon. "Jane and I have a few of the costumes still, we can't seem to part with them."

"Where do your parents live?"

Lizzy stared towards the fire, realizing that neither of them knew that both her parents were dead. "Oh they're both gone now."

Georgiana looked down, regretting her question.

Elizabeth leaned forward, knowing the girl was uncomfortable, ready to change the subject when she felt a cover drop down around her shoulders from above. She pulled it around her and closed her eyes for a moment.

"I have one more...an eight letter word for creating a new plant from and old one by cutting?"

Elizabeth opened her eyes, took up the white cotton thread, "grafting...?"

"Yes, I think that might work."

Patchwork X

Posted on Friday, 21 March 2003

Elizabeth laid in her bed, looking across at the mini-quilt draped over the sewing machine. The moon shed enough light on the material to give outline to the shapes but the true colors were distorted. She closed her eyes trying to remember exactly how red the border had looked when she and Georgiana attached it together, now it seemed a faded union blue. Perhaps her senses had been faulty, maybe the lateness of the hour or the glow of the fire had changed the intensity of everything.

Jane entered the room quietly and sat down on the edge of the bed. “Wake up Lizzy, it's morning.” She rubbed her sisters leg gently, realizing she was in the middle of a dream.

Lizzy could hear someone calling her, but the voice sounded far away. She was in the library with Mr. Darcy. He was reading and she was drawing on a piece of paper, it was odd that although her hand was moving the pencil she couldn't quite make out what she was trying to sketch. The telephone rang and she answered it . “Darcy residence.” It was the gallery owner, Mr. Wickham. He wanted to know if he could make a date for lunch with her to discuss her work. While she was talking with him her back had been turned from Mr. Darcy and she felt a gentle tapping on her shoulder, assuming it was him she promised Mr. Wickham she would call him back later that evening. When her eyes opened she realized the tapping was Jane trying to wake her.

“You still talk in your sleep.” Jane smiled.

Lizzy pulled herself up, wrapping her arms around her knees. “Did I say anything interesting?”

“A couple of yes' and one garbled name that sounded like Wick.”

“I was having a strange dream. The name is Wickham.” Elizabeth reached to her bedside table to retrieve a business card, handing it to Jane she explained, “I met him at the fair yesterday and he's interested in my quilts for a show at his gallery in town.”

“Hmm…. Do you think he'll call you.” Jane's eyes widened hopefully, thinking that this was exactly what her sister needed.

Lizzy thought for a moment and laughed, “Well, if dreams come true.”

The sisters stopped their joking when they heard someone outside the door. Lizzy rose, donned in grey sweats and a t-shirt she opened the door that was already ajar. She saw Georgiana walking down the hall towards the stairs.

“Miss Darcy can I help you with something?' Lizzy felt it could be later than she thought.

“Oh, Elizabeth I was hoping to get the quilt back, you see my brother has changed his plans about when we will be leaving for Gray….you see he has decided on early this morning instead.” Georgiana delivered this piece of news with a face so unmoved by emotion that it elicited the exact opposite response she intended.

Lizzy knew she was out of turn even as the words left her lips, “No, it's to soon. Why you've just come home and now you must leave already.” Georgiana watched in amazement as Elizabeth's own expression changed from disappointment, to injustice to empathy, incorporating everything she herself had felt when her brother had informed her of this change of plans last evening. At the time she thought his decision for leaving earlier had come from nowhere but now as she stood before Elizabeth, seeing her feelings mirrored back to her, feelings she was so ill equipped to express, her brother's motives became clear. He realized last evening, while they all sat together in the library, engaged in an intimate evening that he and his sister could easily be drawn to this woman, using her to fill in all the gaps but in the process drowning her with their intensity. Georgiana smiled outwardly to convince Elizabeth that she felt no distress over leaving earlier than expected but inwardly she smiled to herself for the discovery of her brother's sensitivity.

Jane had been listening from the bedroom but had come out in time to hear Elizabeth's last few words.

“I think this scheme is for the best. I hope I didn't disturb you.” Georgiana maintained her gaze, careful not to reveal the logical conclusion her thoughts were working out.

Elizabeth softened in her stance by the girl's reassurances, hesitantly turning to retrieve the quilt. She returned with the unfinished piece and reluctantly gave it over. “I'm sorry I didn't have more time, it's coming along quite nicely.”

Georgiana took it in her own hands and folded it carefully, “ Thank you for all your help but I think I'll try to finish it off myself at school.”

Lizzy smiled, “It's the best way to learn. If you run into any problems bring it home at Christmas time and we can work on it some more.”

“Oh I'd like that.” Georgiana said goodbye to Jane and Elizabeth and started down the hallway, moving quickly, anxious to see if her brother looked different, now that she knew he was in love.

Elizabeth turned to Jane looking exasperated, “I don't know why he's in such a rush with her all the time?”

Jane considered Elizabeth's state before replying, “Perhaps there are good reasons that we're not privy to…William doesn't seem to be rash in his decisions, in fact from everything I've seen he is quite the opposite.”

Elizabeth admitted to herself that she and Jane saw Mr. Darcy from very different perspectives. Jane's more distant and casual friendship afforded her a view that was probably truer. She was becoming embroiled in their private affairs and no matter what the kindnesses or warm moments she had shared with them she was taking to many liberties at guessing their feelings. After all, what right did she have, she was only the housekeeper.

Elizabeth gave Jane a hug, “I am so glad you came for Thanksgiving, Jane, it `s been wonderful just to see your face everyday.”

“Don't forget Elizabeth, who it was that invited me.” Jane gave Lizzy a knowing glance.

“You are right Jane. Mr. Darcy is a very good friend to Charles and for that reason I see his character is basically good.”

Jane smiled, “ I don't believe the guest list was constructed only to please Charles, Elizabeth.”

Before Elizabeth could respond to Jane's insinuation both of them turned to see Mr. Darcy approaching. He was dressed in a white shirt, blue blazer and khaki pants, his hair was slightly damp from the shower, as he approached he put his hands to his waist, looking as though he were issuing orders out to some underlings at work. Elizabeth sensed that he was uncomfortable in front of the two women, one a guest in his home and the other his housekeeper.

“Miss Bennet, I'm leaving now with Georgiana for Gray. We have changed our plans and will not be here for lunch or dinner today. Mrs. Brown is already starting to prepare breakfast. I think perhaps, in light of the fact that you worked on a holiday, you may have today off as well.” At this point he looked down, a bit embarrassed by his own kindness. “I'll be back sometime on Sunday.” He turned to Jane and looked up, “Jane it was a pleasure to see you again. I hope you have a safe trip home.”

“Thank you… and thank you for a wonderful weekend.”

“Please don't leave on my account, feel free to stay another day.”

Both of the women thanked him and he was gone.

Jane did not pursue her thoughts on Mr. Darcy's motives and Elizabeth, wishing to enjoy her day with her sister put these troubling thoughts to the side as well.

Darcy looked over at Georgiana, asleep in the passenger seat, her head had fallen forward slightly but she was secure in her seatbelt. He looked back at the road wondering if his worry for her would ever end. She had been more emotional this weekend than in past months. Her outburst at the dinner table on Thanksgiving was distressing... but it could be a good sign as well. Maybe she was finally letting herself feel again, even if it was only about his situation. He reminded himself that she had played the piano this weekend and seemed to truly enjoy herself at the craft fair. These two activities had one common motivator, Elizabeth. The image of her in the hall this morning convinced him he was becoming more and more attracted to her each day. Her reactions and laughter were no longer enough to satisfy him. He desired to know every detail, to capture every fact and thought, past and present that she parceled out about herself, eventually collecting all and owning her completely. These thoughts had drove him from the house this morning, the desire for her was becoming to hard to hide and he feared his exposure would surely bring rejection or flight. He knew she wasn't ready for him or Georgiana, she was making her way through something and he was sure if they descended upon her as they both longed to do, she would be consumed by their needs and surely lose her way.

“Georgiana” He gently nudged her. “You have been sleeping…We have arrived…come now we must move along.” Georgiana roused, rubbed her eyes and got out to help with the luggage. They moved silently into the dormitory, up the stairs and down the hall to her room. They were both surprised to see the door open and music coming from inside.

“Have they switched my room.” Darcy and Georgiana entered to see a girl sitting on a bed that had been placed on the opposite wall from Georgiana's own bed.

Before they could speak the girl stood up and quickly walked to the radio and shut off the music. She returned to her side of the room and looked at both of them. She smiled before she extended her hand “You must be Georgiana Darcy. I'm your new roommate, Charlotte Lukas.”

In the excitement and business of Thanksgiving Darcy had forgotten that Georgiana was to have a roommate. He quickly looked the girl over and immediately disapproved, she had on a much too short skirt, black boots and if he wasn't mistaken there was a tiny gold ring just above her left nostril. Oh, he had agreed to a roommate but he hadn't agreed to Madonna.

“I didn't know I was to have a roommate.” Georgiana walked over to the girl, beaming.

“I think I forgot to tell you over vacation. Dean May had asked me if it would be alright and I agreed.” He looked over to Georgiana with an I'm sorry expression but was met with a wide smile.

The two girls walked over to the cd-radio player and began talking about music when Darcy excused himself abruptly but promised to be back shortly.

He made a beeline for the Dean's office preparing how he would get rid of this roommate for his sister. Lost in thought he had accidentally walked past her office, but she had seen him and called him back.

“Mr. Darcy I'm so glad you've come by. Has Georgiana met Charlotte yet?”

He entered and remained standing even though the Dean had motioned for him to sit.

“Yes we have met her and I must confess this is not the sort of roommate I had envisioned for my sister.”

“I know Charlotte looks a bit unconventional but I assure you she is an excellent student and I think she could really use the drawing out.”

Darcy had been ready with a rebuttal but stopped before his words became sound. “Wait I thought Georgiana was the one who needed drawing out. It looks to me Miss Lukas doesn't need much help in that department.”

“We all have our needs Mr. Darcy, some are more apparent then others. I think it would do Georgiana good to focus on someone other than herself for a while. By helping each other I think they may get past some of their problems.”

Darcy sat down and sighed, the more he tried to understand people the more confused he became. Could he be wrong about Elizabeth as well.

“Mr. Darcy what is it? If you think it is that bad of an idea I'll change her back to a single room.”

He shook his head, looking past her “No we'll try it.” Darcy straightened in his chair, “May I inquire as to the problems Miss Lukas has had.”

“Neglect, no one takes an interest in her. Her parents never come to the school, she is driven back and forth by a driver. I think she could use a good friend.”

Darcy rose, shaking the Dean's hand and promising her to come by when he picked Georgiana up for Christmas.

Patchwork X I

Posted on Wednesday, 2 April 2003

Jane carried her suitcase into the kitchen, interrupting Mrs Brown and Elizabeth who were discussing menus.

“Jane, I wish you didn't have to leave.” Elizabeth held her sisters arm. Mrs Brown turned to busy herself with some chopping but could not help herself from watching the girls together.

“It was truly the best holiday we've had in a long time.” Jane squeezed her back, both sisters feeling a bitter warmth.

“I see you're all packed and ready.” Charles had roused the girls from their memories and had his usual effect.

“What can I say, Elizabeth, I'm in your debt. You have brought me a wonderful woman and have managed to arrest the Darcy household from pulling apart at the seams.”

“Why would you say that Mr. Bingley?” Elizabeth laughed, trusting in his good intentions.

“Well, I was worried, that when Reynolds left Darcy would be showing up in places with unmatched socks, stains on his ties and a general air of confusion about his person but you have seen to it that he is as he ever was.”

“Perhaps a bit of confusion would have caused a welcome change.” Elizabeth knew she was being a little unkind but she was still feeling upset with Darcy over rushing Georgianna back to school.

Bingley's humor dropped a bit in acknowledgement. “Don't underestimate the power of a warm homelife.” Bingley glanced into Elizabeth's eyes for an instant before he turned to Jane, stroking the back of her hair, “We must be off, I'll meet you outside, I think Caroline is still upstairs.” He kissed her gently and went off.

Lizzy walked Jane out to the car, thinking about what Charles had said, feeling depressed about being congratulated on perpetuating Darcy's behavior. Yes, it was true that she had tried to make the holiday enjoyable and all the days that he was home but she couldn't see how that would help change things. She shook her head, puzzled over his meaning.

“What is it Lizzy?” Jane could see that her sister was distracted.

“Oh nothing” she looked up at Jane realizing that she was missing her scarf. “You've left your scarf in my room. Let me just run up.”

Lizzy darted through the house, moving through the dining room but stopped short before the foyer. She heard Caroline and Charles talking and recognized her name.

“I know she is your girlfriends sister but she is totally inappropriate for this job. For one thing she is entirely to familiar with the family. I told you that when we came home last night she was sitting on the floor in the library, as if she were one of the family.”

“Oh Caroline we are not talking about an indentured servant. Elizabeth is a young, beautiful girl and you have to understand that Georgianna would naturally be enamored with her. I for one think her influence here has been very positive.”

“Charles how can you say that, did you see that outburst of Georgianna's at Thanksgiving. And William has barely spoken to me the entire time I have been here. I think he's depressed and I'm afraid the interference of that girl is upsetting his household.”

Charles suppressed a smile at the thought of not two minutes before making a speech stating the complete opposite. As far as Darcy not speaking to her he couldn't bring himself to dash her hopes but he knew eventually he would have to, because, regardless of her insensitivities, he still loved her.

Darcy is fine but if you are truly concerned I will, on some pretext, have him go out with us next week and we can check on him.

His sister, unsatisfied with the conclusion but at a loss for any other schemes agreed, on condition to herself that she would work on a plan for Elizabeth's ousting by the new year.

Elizabeth walked through towards the stairs, striving to compose her expression and concealing her anger for Caroline's motives but all the while shivering with vulnerability, knowing that in some part her condemnation held some truth.

Upon seeing her enter Charles immediately led his sister towards the kitchen, feeling that if he ignored Elizabeth perhaps it would mean she hadn't overheard them.

Bingley led Caroline out to his car, leaving Jane behind to say a last goodbye to her sister.

“Here I've found it.” Lizzy wrapped the scarf around Jane. “You need a new scarf, this one is getting shabby. I can't have my sister moving through society looking fashion challenged.”

Jane smiled and embraced her sister warmly. “Now Lizzy I want you to keep me apprised about this gallery show. I'd love to come, if I can get away.”

Elizabeth's mind was elsewhere as Jane spoke about the show. She had remembered something she needed to speak with Jane about but hesitated, thinking that once again she was becoming to involved.

“Lizzy, what is it?”

“Jane I forgot to ask you something while you were here….but you mustn't tell Charles, in case he mentions it to Mr. Darcy.”

Jane looked on with concern and immediate approval, “of course Lizzy, but what is it?”

“How much do you know about asthma? I think Mr. Darcy suffers from some ailment but he is very reticent about discussing himself and…I wonder if he is taking proper care of himself.”

Jane thought for a moment, “You know that is interesting because I thought I saw him use an inhaler while we were horseback riding but he was so quick it barely registered in my mind…I don't know that much but I can certainly research some information…but really everyone's situation is different. One thing I do know is that they have a lot of new medicines and ways of controlling it.”

“I am probably making something of nothing…but if you think of it bring me some of information next time you come.”

Jane looked at Lizzy sympathetically, “Lizzy, you are very closed off here, you don't even have a computer.”

“I know and I don't know how I'm going to take slides of my work and send them by computer to Mr. Wickham.” Lizzy shook her head in thought.

“Lizzy, there must be a library in town you could use, I bet they have online services. I don't know what you'll do about the slides but maybe that's a good place to start.”

“Yes, that is a good idea. I think I'll try there next week.”

The girls gave a last embrace before Jane left Lizzy alone in the kitchen.

Darcy, unwilling to bunk in with the two girls in the now crowded dorm room decided to leave shortly after Georgianna was settled. He drove all afternoon and night, desiring the solitude of his home, his armchair, anxious to dissolve from his body, allowing the ink to drain from the sketches he had rendered of himself, longing to pool in a familiar spot and become completely still.

He arrived just before dawn, parked aways before the house, not wanting to wake anyone and walked up the bending drive. His eyes were dry from the heat in the car and he squinted at the silvery blue frost while hastening toward the backdoor to the kitchen.

He was disappointed when he opened the door and she was standing near the stove. He needed time to work this all out in his mind and her presence he knew would muddle his reflections and plans.

“Miss Bennet, I am surprised anyone is awake.”

Lizzy turned revealing a camera that was strapped around her neck. She poured boiling water into a ready teacup.”

“Would you like some?”

“Yes, thank you” He watched her, feeling himself wavering from his resolve. Her hand went up to the lens as she steadied it from bumping up against her. She had on a white t-shirt and jeans, her hips pulled at the pockets and accentuated the curve inward for the shape of her waist. She moved and turned to reach a cup.

“I hope your sister enjoyed her vacation”, she paused, to long, and therefore made obvious her concern, “although it was very short.”

Darcy shrugged, “Yes, I think she did.”

She held the camera with one hand and handed him the saucer and cup with the other. “You must have driven all night.”

“Yes I did” He sipped his tea, feeling his throat and sinus' clear. “I see you are very busy this morning.” His eyes gestured toward the camera.

“I am not on duty yet. I'm taking some photos to make slides for an art show.” Her defensiveness and attempt at seriousness lagged when she began to laugh. “I don't know… the whole thing is probably silly.” She said more to herself than in conversation.

He smiled at her private dialog and ventured another question, “Is it your camera?”

“No, Mrs. Brown heard me say that I needed a camera and she let me borrow her husbands.”

Darcy thought only for a second before he offered his next inquiry, “Do you know how to use it properly, you'll need the correct lighting to show your work to its best advantage.”

In truth Elizabeth had no idea what she was doing but she couldn't admit total ignorance in front of him. “I think I can manage.”

Darcy nodded in agreement, rationalizing that this outcome would be better.

“I took the liberty of spreading a few things out in the library to photograph. I had no idea you would be home so soon. I can move them to the kitchen.”

“No, it has the best light in the morning. Do what you need, I'll use my bedroom to check e-mail. Please feel free.” With that, Darcy replaced his saucer to the table and moved to leave, departing just in time before temptation had overthrown his judgement.

Elizabeth moved to the library, wishing to finish before seven, when she really should start working. He was right, the light flooded the floor. She walked around two quilts, spread out on the floor, hoping that an inspiration would take hold of her. She started shooting some film, climbing up on a chair to get a better vantage point.

He laid, propped up on pillows, laptop resting on his crossed legs, reading and responding to e-mail occupying just enough of his mind so that he couldn't give his desires his full attention. An e-mail from Charles caught his attention. He opened it, thinking it would be a perfunctory thank you for the weekend. Instead it was an invitation. He read on…” Caroline and I would like you to come out to dinner with us on Thursday, the weekend was wonderful but we left feeling that we didn't get to see you much. I'll meet you at your office after the gym. If that's okay don't bother to respond.”

He'd like to neither attend nor respond. It wasn't that Charles bothered him but this seemed like another ambush. He couldn't bear soulful looks from Caroline, conveying sympathy for his gloomy, lonely life at his crumbling estate.

He opened his eyes, looked over at his nightstand, eyes resting on an old photo of his mother. She was wearing a wool shirt with large buttons and a wide collar, it was obvious by the swell of her stomach that she was pregnant. She was holding a framed photo of a rose, she had won a prize for at her garden club.

In one fluid motion he flipped wires aside, slid the laptop over onto the bed and was out the door headed toward the attic stairs.

Elizabeth's balance faltered when she felt someone behind her. She managed to catch herself by placing her hand on the back of the chair. She looked up at him expecting an apology for startling her but he looked to intent to have noticed.

“I knew they were still around.” He moved past her and propped up the spotlights against the window. “Believe me these will give you just the lighting you'll need to frame your work in a slide correctly.”

Elizabeth climbed down from her chair staring doubtfully at a pair of very antique looking black lights.

“My mother used these to photograph some of her flowers.” He took one up in his hands and began scanning the room for only what Elizabeth thought was it's perfect position.

His seriousness hinted at discomfort and for this she spoke in a way that would relieve him.

“I could use some help. The center of the quilts look clear through the lens but the edges are either blurred or missing.”

Darcy put his hands to his hips and understood the problem quickly. “We need to get these off the floor. Don't you have a pole that you sometimes hang them on?”

“Yes. I'll go get them.” Lizzy was amused by his attitude. She liked the way he was so matter of fact sometimes, there was no underlying meaning to his words, there was a task to be done, so get to it girl. She laughed grabbing the poles in her room and heading back down the stairs.

They worked for hours, positioning, lighting and shooting. When they stepped back Elizabeth saw Darcy grimace.

“Have we forgotten something?” She checked her camera.

Darcy brought his hand to his stomach, “Yes, my breakfast.”

Oh, Mr. Darcy, I completely lost track of time…wait, you haven't eaten since lunch yesterday?”

“I think you may be right.”

“Let me clean up and I'll go make something.”

“Good, I'll be down in a bit.” Darcy folded up the lights and headed out to the stairs.

He propped the lights against his dresser and slid back onto the bed. He reached for his computer and clicked on compose message. In the subject field he entered “Not O.K.” and then went on to decline his friends offer.

He nestled back into his pillow and fell asleep.

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