REAPER
SOULLESS BASTARDS MC MIAMI
ERIN TREJO
Copyright © 2020 by Erin Trejo
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or
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CONTENTS
10.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.
18.
19.
20.
21.
22.
23.
24.
25.
26.
27.
28.
29.
30.
Soulless Bastards MC- Miami Chapter
Reaper
Written by: Erin Trejo
Edited by: Christina Fender
Proofread by: Chriss Prokic
Cover design: Nicole Blanchard with IndieSage PR
Copyright: 2019
All Rights Reserved
Prologue
“I
do.” The words left her lips without so
much as a single thought. We’ve loved each other
since we were kids. She was everything to me then
and she still is.
“You may now kiss the bride.”
With a smile plastered on may face I take her
face in my hands, lean in, and kiss my wife. My
wife. I like the sound of that.
“May I introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. Roland
Sanders,” the priest announces.
I pull away from Molly with a smile on my face.
She beams with happiness every bride should have
on her wedding day. We’ve planned this for so long
and put so much into it. It doesn’t matter that we’re
only twenty-two years old. What matters is that I
love this woman more than I’ve ever loved
anything else in the world. I grab her hand in mine
and walk us down the aisle, surrounded by our
friends and family cheering. Once we get outside
and into the back of the limo I grab her and kiss her
hard.
“I love you so much Mols.” Her lips find mine
in another urgent kiss that nearly steals the breath
from my lungs.
“I love you too. Where are we going for our
honeymoon?” she asks me anxiously.
I chuckle and pull her closer. “Wherever you
want baby. The world is ours.”
Holding my Molly in my arms like this is pure
fucking heaven. There is nothing in the world that I
wouldn’t do for her. Nowhere I wouldn’t go. She
means everything to me. I know we both have our
demons, but together we are unstoppable.
“Roland?” Molly asks from her place in my
arms.
“Yeah?”
“Do you think we could move?”
“Anywhere you want to baby.”
“Do you think he’d find us?”
I let out a sigh and press my lips into the top of
her hair.
“I won’t let him.”
1
Reaper
T
he sparks from the welding machine flicker
and burn my skin. I welcome the pain, it’s a
reminder of what I had and what I’d lost. A
reminder of everything I want to forget. It’s a
reminder of the ache in my chest that still pisses me
off. Why can’t I shake her? She’s nothing to me
anymore, but for some reason that lingering ache
just sits there day after day. Nothing eases it.
Nothing makes it better. I can drink until I lose
days, fuck until my dick hurts, but the ache is still
there.
“Hey Ink, pass me that piece of metal,” I call
out.
He reaches down grabbing the piece I need
before passing it to me. Adding it to the piece I
already have welded in place, I grin. If this doesn’t
conceal the shit we’re moving then nothing will.
“You weldin’ that under the trucks?” Ink squats
next to me and asks. I pull the welding mask off
and toss it to the side.
“Yeah. Won’t be shit that’s able to get in there,
you add waterproof bags in those and you won’t
have shit happen to the product movin’ up north,”
Ink chuckles picking up one of my finished pieces.
“You’re pretty fuckin’ handy with that
machine,” he mumbles.
I chuckle and grab another piece ready to make
a few more cases. Moving drugs up north from
Miami has always been a risk. Most cops know
where to look. I like to make them work to find it. I
also like making money, which is exactly why I do
this. Welding hidden compartments is my specialty.
You need it well hidden, then you call me.
“Think this will work for people?” Ink
chuckles.
“How the hell are you gonna hide a body under
a fuckin’ truck brother?”
“I didn’t say a whole body. Think pieces.”
When I look up I can see he’s serious as he eyes
the piece of metal in his hand.
“Suppose if you pack it the same way,” I tell
him as I pull a cigarette out of the pack and light it
up.
“Might come in handy, yeah?” He just looks at
me. I nod once before blowing out a ring of smoke.
“You think you could work the inside of a box
truck?”
His question catches my attention. Shoving off
the stool I’ve been sitting on I stand and stretch my
back. With my cigarette hanging between my lips I
shrug.
“Don’t see why not. Never done one before,
but I don’t think it would be too hard to add a few
false walls. Where are you goin’ with this?” I ask
watching his face for a reaction.
“Just thinkin’ brother. You know we gotta stay
one step ahead of the cops. Motherfuckers are
always sniffin’ around.”
So fucking true. It’s not hard for us to stay a
step ahead of them. We are smarter than those
fuckers; at least I am. I know how and when to
move shit, most people make it too obvious and the
distributors are dumb as fuck. That’s why I like
handling this shit on my own.
“I don’t think they’ll find these. I’ll send out
the decoy first. That way even if I am stopped, I
should be covered,” I inform him. Ink nods before
setting the metal back on the floor.
“We got a good fuckin’ thing goin’ on here.
Fucked up that Joe’s not here to see it,” Ink says
reminding me that Joe was a good guy. He owned
the local bar, but he also housed a lot of products
for us. He was killed a short while back over some
shit with the mob.
“Yeah. He would be very proud of this shit. I
gotta go talk to Viking about the next run,” I tell
him as I flick my cigarette to the ground. The
sparks flicker before I snuff it out with my boot. As
I walk away, I look at the small blisters the hot
metal made on my skin. I reach up and pick at a
few as I stop in the main room. I inhale deep and
head toward Viking’s office.
“Hey Reaper,” Tink hollers when she sees me.
Club whores. You gotta love ‘em.
“Hey darlin’. Where’s your play toy?” I ask
keeping my eyes locked on hers. Tink throws her
head back and laughs.
“Mason won’t let me play with Whit anymore.
He’s all about ruining the party,” she giggles. I
chuckle. Mason won’t let anyone near Whitley
these days. He’s got that girl wrapped around his
dick.
“Heard that. Gotta go talk to Prez.”
Tink nods her head before walking down the
hall. I knock on Viking’s door and wait impatiently.
“Yeah,” he finally hollers. Shoving the door
open I saunter inside.
“Hey brother. I need to talk to you about the
run comin’ up. I’ll have the trucks up and ready, but
I don’t like takin’ that little fuck Prime with me.”
Viking just laughs and leans back in his chair with a
beer in his hand.
“Why the fuck not?”
“Are you fuckin’ with me right now? That son
of a bitch can’t drive worth a damn. You ever seen
him on his bike?” Viking laughs even harder, sitting
up a littler straighter.
“Mason’s on another run with Chain. A couple
of the prospects are ridin’ with him. Swap one of
them out, I don’t give a fuck,” Viking says taking
another pull from his beer.
“Thank fuck. I get pulled over and I’ll kill the
little shit if I have to sit in a goddamn cell with the
little prick.” Viking shakes his head.
“You talked to Jimmy?”
Shaking my head, I wonder where this shit is
heading. Jimmy is a guy that we used to work with.
He went to prison years ago, and we haven’t heard
from him since.
“I heard he got out. That’s about as much as I
know.”
“Yeah, he’s out alright. The motherfucker put a
call into the So Cal boys. He wants his position
back.” I watch as Viking’s eyes darken and turn
almost black in color.
“Fuck that. Why call So Cal? He didn’t work
with them,” I growl.
I know what he’s doing. He’s trying to sneak his
way back in anywhere he can. It’s not going to
work, and if he so much as steps foot anywhere
near any of the other chapters, I’ll fucking kill him
myself. We voted his ass out for a reason. He
wasn’t good for us and he always brought trouble
that we didn’t need. He was lazy as fuck and didn’t
care who he brought down with him. He took two
of our guys to prison with him claiming it was their
fault he got caught.
“Guess he knew he wouldn’t get anywhere with
us. Stupid fuck,” Viking grumbles.
“You let me know if I need to move in, yeah?”
Being club enforcer I’ll gladly handle the bastard.
“Have no doubt brother.”
“I’m gonna head out for a bit. Get a few
supplies before I make the run,” I tell him. Viking
nods his head before I turn and walk out ready to
get this run over with.
2
Molly
M
y stomach churns as bile races up my
throat; it burns. My body aches, my head spins and
I can’t focus.
“I don’t know why you always want to fuck me
over Molly. Do you like it when I hit you?”
Blood trickles into my eye and blurs my vision
even more. As my head lolls side to side Thomas
strikes again.
“It’s my money. I told you that you were never
leaving me.” Another blow lands and I see stars.
“Leave my mom alone!” Drake cries and
pushes his way past Thomas to try to get to me. I
try to raise my hands to stop him, but I’m too late.
His little arms are already wrapped around my
neck.
“Fucking brat. I don’t know why I let you keep
that kid here. I told you I want him gone. Give him
to his real dad,” Thomas screams even louder. I lift
my arm and pull Drake as close to me as I can get
him. Thomas storms from the room as the door
slams shut behind him.
“Are you okay mom?” As Drake pulls away his
little hands reach up to wipe the blood from my
cheek. He wipes his hand down his jeans before
looking at me again.
“I’m sorry Drake. Mom is going to get you
somewhere safe. I promise,” I lie. I’ve said it over
and over, again and again. Each time I try to steal a
little bit of money from Thomas he figures it out.
I’ve tried. God knows I have, but this is always the
end result.
“It’s okay mom. We can do this. Let me help
you,” Drake says while running his thumb up and
down my cheek. That’s something I should be
doing to comfort him, and yet he’s the one doing it
for me.
“No, you’re too young.”
“I’m almost ten,” he reminds me. I let myself
laugh a little. Taking a moment, I hold my son and
revel in the boy that has brought me so much joy.
“You are almost ten. I can’t believe you’re that
old already. It amazes me that we’ve made it this
long,” I whisper and pull him into my chest.
I may not have been the best mother, and I may
not have protected him the way I should have, but I
did the best I could with what I had to work with.
Now it’s time for him to have better. It’s time for
him to live the life he’s supposed to be living. He
needs to grow up without fear of watching his mom
being abused until she passes out. He needs a life
where he can play with other kids his own age and
laugh. I can’t offer him that. I don’t know that I’ll
ever be able to.
“We need to go as soon as Thomas leaves,
okay? I need you to grab your run bag. Okay?”
Drake pulls back, looks up at me, and nods his
head slowly. He’s watching me to see if I’m going
to change my mind. I won’t. We have set up a small
bag with everything that’s important to him. A
change of clothes and his birth certificate are in a
small bag that he can run with when the time came.
“Fucking bitch,” I hear Thomas screaming in
the living room, and no doubt still pissed at me.
Drake turns with his head held high as he looks
me in the eyes. Those bright green eyes are so
much like his dad’s. They haunt me. It kills me to
know what I threw away just to try to keep them
safe.
“I’ll grow up and get stronger mom. I will. Then
I won’t let him hurt you anymore.”
Tears stream down my cheeks as I hear the
front door slam. I wait until I hear the truck start
and back out of the driveway.
“Go grab your bag,” I tell Drake as I shove him
toward the door.
I watch as his little worn out shoes leave the
room with sad tears leaking out of my eyes. I
should have been a better mother to him. He
deserves so much more than the minimal things
Thomas provides. Wiping my cheeks quickly I
stand and hold my head up trying to balance
myself. Drake runs back into the room with his
backpack on.
“Are you sure we have to do this mom?” he
asks softly.
“It’s the only way I’ll know you’re safe.
Everything will be okay. I promise,” I reassure him.
Everything around me spins, but I kneel down
and grab the last forty dollars I have hidden in the
crack of the floorboard and stuff it into my pocket.
Standing back up on quivering legs, I reach for
Drake’s hand.
It’s now or never. If we don’t do this today I
never will, and I may end up dead before my son
has his tenth birthday.
“Let’s go.”
Heading out of the room I’m cautious even
though I heard his truck leave. He’s done this once
before. He walked back down to the house
knowing I had planned to escape. I don’t know how
he knew, but that was almost a year ago. I haven’t
tried again until today. I know what will happen to
me if I stay. The same thing that happened tonight,
only so much worse.
Drake and I make it out the front door and
down the steps. Every noise, every little crunch of
a leaf under my tattered shoes, has me on edge and
makes me cringe. Drake holds tightly to my hand.
We don’t live far off of the main road, so it’s only
minutes before we reach it and I can flag a taxi,
rambling off the address while praying to God he’s
still there. I wasn’t stupid. I had done my research
when I was able to get my hands on Thomas’s
phone. I found out everything I could about him.
Where he lives, what he’s been doing and even
about all the arrests he’s had.
At first it didn’t make sense. That wasn’t the
man I’d known, but it didn’t matter. All that
mattered was that he could provide something
better for Drake. The taxi slows to a stop and the
driver looks over his shoulder at my bloody and
mangled face.
“You sure this is where you want me to drop
you?”
I drag my gaze to the building in front of us and
read the sign aloud, “Soulless Bastards MC.” I pull
my eyes back to the driver and nod while pulling
the cash out of my pocket.
“Come on Drake.” I climb out of the cab and
pull my son out behind me. After closing the door,
it takes him no time at all to speed off and get the
hell out of here. Loud music blasts from behind the
closed door. I swallow hard while trying to fight the
pain in my chest and stomach.
“Are you okay?” Drake asks. I glance down at
him and shake my head. I’m losing it. I’m going to
pass out. I swallow hard and try to ignore the pain
in my chest and stomach. I can feel it. It’s
happening and I can’t stop it.
“Roland Sanders. Ask for him,” I mumble
shoving Drake in the direction of the door.
“Mom?” he asks through teary eyes.
The world sways as my stomach tumbles.
“Go. Now!” I snap. Drake turns and hurries up
the steps to open the front door.
As soon as I see him step inside I let myself fall
apart. The overwhelming need to sleep takes over
and I close my eyes. I don’t know what happens
after that.
3
Reaper
G
rabbing another rope I toss it into the pile
of shit that I’m unloading out of the shed behind
the clubhouse. This run is one I’m ready for. I’ve
been ready to try out all of my new experiments for
a while now. Staying ahead of the game is always
on the top of my to do list. What isn’t on it? Sirens.
I can hear them off in the distance.
“Reaper, get the fuck in here,” Viking yells out
the back door.
Goddamn it. This is not the time for a shake
down from those bastards. I have too much going
on. I blow out a breath and leave the pile of rope
where it lies. Heading through the back door
everyone seems to be in a panic. I run my hand
through my hair as I head into the main room and
stop in my tracks. That’s where the world slowly
stops spinning and all of the air is sucked from my
lungs.
I stand there staring into the same green eyes I
see in my fucking reflection every day. The same
dark hair that hangs wildly around my shoulders;
hangs in that little boy’s eyes.
“We have a little situation,” Viking says
nodding toward the kid. My eyes stay there
lingering on something that can’t be. “He says he’s
lookin’ for Roland Sanders.” The room grows silent.
“His dad.” I swallow hard, but my eyes stay
furrowed never leaving his. There is no way in hell
he can be mine. Is there?
“Can’t be,” I mumble under my breath. The
little boy holds his head high and walks toward me.
There’s defiance in him, a rough streak that
reminds me so much of myself.
“My name is Drake Sanders,” he says. His
voice is full of confidence even with that little
shake in it.
“Where’s your mom?” I ask him.
“That’s the other problem,” Viking grumbles.
“Whoever she is was fucked up. Passed out in the
front yard. Club bitch called an ambulance.”
Fuck. What the hell is going on around here?
“Watch the kid.” I motion to Ink. He looks at
the kid and then back at me before he shrugs. I
head toward the front door needing to see what the
hell this is about. There’s no way it could be her.
She left me. Walked the fuck away from me
without so much as a goodbye or a fuck you. I
never even knew why.
As I step out the front door I see the lights from
the ambulance and police cars as they dance
through the night sky. Right there on a stretcher is
someone covered in blood, illuminated in red and
blue lights.
Slowly I make my way closer until I reach the
side. I swallow hard as I look down at the broken
and beaten piece of my past that ran away from
me.
“Molly?” I say her name softly. Her head lolls
to the side and there’s an oxygen mask covering her
face.
“I’m sorry.”
Those are the only words that fall from her lips.
I’m pushed back by the paramedics as they load
her into the back. Cops are buzzing with questions
in my ear, but I don’t hear any of them. It’s her.
After all these years. Where was she? What
happened to her? Is that really my kid? None of this
is making any sense.
“Reaper let’s go man,” Chain says behind me.
I glance over my shoulder wondering when this
asshole even made it back, not that I give a shit. I
nod my head once before looking back to the
ambulance. The guys slam the back doors closed
and the thought of running after them, making them
take the boy with them, runs through the back of
my mind. I don’t act on it though. She brought him
here for a reason.
Finally pulling my gaze from the ambulance I
turn on my heel and head back inside. As soon as I
step foot over the threshold Fin finds me.
“I don’t know what this shit is, but he says
you’re his dad. We’ve got Taz gettin’ him somethin’
to eat and shit, but fuck Reaper.” His eyes hold a
hint of sorrow, but even more confusion.
“Fuck Fin. I don’t know what the hell is goin’
on. That was Molly.” I inform him.
Fin is the only one that knows that Molly took
off on me. He’s the only one that I’ve been close to
since then. Viking and the guys know I have a past
with her, but that’s about it. This man is like my
fucking brother in more ways than one. His hand
comes to rest on my shoulder, and a slight smirk
crosses his face.
“There ain’t no way you can deny that boy
Reaper. He looks just like you brother. He didn’t
get any features from his momma, God help the
boy,” he chuckles. He’s right though. He does look
just like me.
“I didn’t know she was pregnant Fin. I…
Fuck!” I roar. Tugging at my hair I try to reason this
out in my mind, but there’s nothing. There is
absolutely no way that this shit plays out well. She
didn’t tell me she was pregnant. Hell, when she left
me we were fucking happy, or at least I thought so.
“She had her reasons Roland. We need to figure
out what the hell is goin’ on. She brought him to
you for a reason brother.” His eyes burn into mine.
He looks me dead in the eyes. I nod my head and
release the grip I have on my hair.
“Yeah, you’re right, but we have this run and
shit comin’ up.”
“Go in the office and talk to Viking. I’ll take the
run so you can figure this shit out,” Fin says.
I nod my head as he releases his grip on me.
Heading down the hall my head swims. I try my
best to conjure every goddamn memory I have of
that last day we had together. We were fucking
sitting on the back-porch swing and talking about
the future. I let that day play out in my mind as I
mindlessly walk into Viking’s office. We were
happy.
“I’d say you look like you saw a ghost, but you
sure as fuck just did,” he says with the same
confusion in his voice.
“What the fuck is this shit Viking? I don’t see
her for years and now she’s layin’ beat to shit in
front of the clubhouse with a kid? I don’t get it,” I
run my hand through my hair before taking the seat
in front of his desk. My mind is spiraling out of
control.
“Put a call into Captain Richards. See what he
can figure out for us. Aside from that I have no
fuckin’ clue what to say here.”
Pulling out a cigarette I light it up. I don’t want
the fucking cop we have on our payroll knowing
shit, but that looks like our only option right now.
“What the fuck am I supposed to do with a
kid?”
“Talk to him. See what you can find out. I’m
sure he knows whatever the fuck is going on,”
Viking says as he sits down across from me.
“Fuck!” I roar when someone knocks on the
door.
“Yeah? Open it,” Viking yells.
“Hey the kid’s barfin’ all over and Shauna is
lookin’ for you Reaper,” Ink says.
This is not good. Not good at all. I shove out of
the chair and head toward the door. I can hear
Viking right behind me when he mumbles, “I gotta
see this.” I want to punch him in the fucking face.
Shauna is a girl I’ve been seeing off and on for a
while now. She’s a sweet girl who wants marriage,
but she’s not my type of girl. I don’t know what the
hell I’m walking into with her and then having to
tell her I’ve got a kid.
“Hey baby,” she squeals when she sees me.
Throwing her arms around my neck I pull her
closer. I need that connection right now even if it is
a fucking lie. I’ve never felt connected to anyone
the way I did with Molly, but Shauna is a filler.
“Need to talk to you,” I say when the kitchen
door opens. Drake walks out looking pale, sad, and
every other emotion you can think of. I’m sure this
is hard for him too, being in a strange place with
people he doesn’t know. I just don’t know how to
handle it.
“Jesus Christ! He’s yours?” Shauna asks. I
follow her gaze as she stares straight at the smaller
version of me.
“I didn’t know I had a kid Shauna. He just
showed up here and-”
She doesn’t let me finish. She shoves out of my
arms and heads straight for him. Dropping to her
knees in front of him I watch as she cups his cheek
and talks to him softly.
“Well fuck. I thought she was gonna give you
hell,” Viking chuckles behind me. This isn’t exactly
what I expected of her either.
4
Molly
“M
a’am. Can you hear me?” I can
hear the doctors rushing around me, but my vision
blurs and I slip into the past. The world wasn’t
always this bad. Roland and I were happy once. I
remember…
“What time is your mom comin’ over?” he asks
while unpacking the boxes in the living room.
“She said around three. Who knows with her,” I
giggle. I never know when my mom is going to
really show up. Sometimes it’s early, but most of
the time it’s later.
“If she ever showed up when she said she
would, I might die,” Roland chuckles.
I bend over and grab another box when I hear
him groan. Cocking my head to the side I smile at
the look on his face.
“We’re unpacking Ro,” I remind him.
He chuckles, tosses his box to the side, and
quickly stands up. “Never too busy for a little
fun,” he says as he stalks toward me. I drop the
box in front of me, stand up, and try to get away
from him.
“Mom will be here soon.”
“She never comes on time.”
“I mean it Ro. What if she shows up?” I back
away slowly as he mimics my movements.
“So what? She knows you’re mine now.”
His eyes sparkle with light. He’s everything I
could have ever wanted and more. He’s my other
half. He’s my soulmate. He’s my everything.
“Stop Roland! Really,” I try to protest, but it
comes out as squeal.
“You little runaway. Stop runnin’ from me
baby.”
His hands wrap around my waist and he pulls
me into his hard body. His warm lips caress mine
taking what he wants from me. It’s like a small
piece of heaven being in his arms. Our past is just
that; past, locked away from all that is good in the
world. Nothing else matters.
“You know how much I love you?” he pulls
back and asks me. His eyes are so full of love. I
don’t think I could love him anymore either.
“As much as I love you.”
The memory slowly fades back into the
blackness. That’s where I hold the truth. The horror
of what haunts both of us.
“You’re nothing. You will never be anything
either. Your mother was just like you when she was
younger. Bitch left me for that no good father of
yours,” his words burn through my heart. How
could he say those things about her? Who is he?
“Leave her alone. I’ll kill both of you,” Roland
roars from the side of the room where I’m tied up.
His face bloodied, but that doesn’t stop him from
trying.
“You shut the fuck up. Don’t make me hurt her
more,” the asshole winks at me. I still in his arms
praying that he’ll let us go. I don’t know what he
wants from me. I don’t know anything.
“Your mother took so much. Just took and took
and never gave a damn. Do you know how that
feels to have someone take so much from you and
never give anything in return?” he asks as his lips
are way too close to my skin. My stomach churns.
“I don’t know anything!” I scream.
Before the man can do anything further
Roland’s roar rips through the room. We all turn to
look at him as the ropes that were holding him fall
away. He looks like the Hulk in this moment. His
eyes are darker than I’ve ever seen them. His
nostrils flare. He rushes towards us and the man
holding me releases me just as Roland lunges.
They both hit the floor with a thud. The other man
leaps onto Roland’s back. The sounds are
something that I’ll never forget, the sound of bones
breaking and gasping for breath.
“Roland!” I scream for him. The room
suddenly grows silent. Roland slowly stands with
blood covering every inch of his skin. His chest
heaves with every breath he takes.
“Is he-” I can’t finish the sentence. I can’t
know that the man I love just killed someone with
his bare hands.
“He is, but not that one,” he says nodding
toward the other man. He slowly walks towards
him and lifts his nearly lifeless body from the
floor.
“You come around us again and you’ll end up
like your friend. You get me?” The man groans
before Roland drops his body back to the floor.
5
Reaper
I
pace the room running my hand through my
hair. Shauna has been cooking and cleaning the
house. The kid sits on the couch silently watching
my every move. What the hell do I do with him?
“What happened to your mom?” I ask turning
to look at him. His eyes are full of hurt and tears
and I have no idea what to do for him.
“She got hurt.”
“Got that part, kid. Who did it?” He flinches at
the harshness of my voice.
“I can’t tell you that,” he says softly.
“Why the fuck not? How the fuck do you want
me to fix this shit if you won’t tell me?” I snap. The
kid flinches and pulls his legs up to his chest.
“Reaper, calm down,” Shauna says softly
coming to my side. Her arm wraps around my waist
as she holds me against her.
“What the fuck am I supposed to do here?
Huh?” I ask, needing her to help guide me. I don’t
know what I’m doing with this kid and I sure as
fuck don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing
with any of this.
“Honey, it’s okay to talk to him, he can help,”
Shauna says quietly. Drake looks up at her, and his
green eyes are full of unshed tears. The kid has
heart, I’ll give him that much.
“She told me I can’t tell. All she said was that
she was sorry and that my dad would give me a
better life,” he hiccups through the words.
Give him a better life? What kind of fucking life
has she been living? She had a good life with me
and she threw that away.
“Fuck! This is bullshit,” I roar pulling away
from Shauna. Grabbing a cigarette from the pack
off the table I light it up. Shauna moves to sit next
to Drake on the couch.
“He can help you. You have to trust him
though. I know he seems a little scary right now,
but he really is a good guy.” Listen to her. A good
guy? I used to be a good guy until a taste for death
set in. I’m not a good guy, at least not anymore.
“Mom told me he was a good guy too. She said
he would give me a better life. She said he wouldn’t
hurt me.” Drake’s voice is small when he talks. My
heart sinks in my chest when I realize what he just
said. Someone has been hurting him. No, hurting
them.
“He won’t hurt you honey, but you need to tell
him what you know so he can help you and your
mom,” she tells him holding his hand.
“Mom made me promise not to tell.”
“I don’t give a shit what your mom made you
promise kid. You want me to fuckin’ help you two
then you need to talk.” My anger is misplaced. I
know it is, but this is shit.
“Reaper,” Shauna yells at me.
“Fuck off Shauna! I can’t do this shit. You
know what? You deal with the kid,” I turn and
storm out of the room.
Heading down the hallway, I stomp into my
bedroom and slam the door closed. Bringing him
here was a mistake. I don’t know what I’m doing. I
can’t be a fucking dad. What kind of person am I?
I strip out of my clothes before walking into the
bathroom. I need a shower. I need to figure out
what the hell is going on. Why was she beaten and
more importantly, why she thought dumping him
with me, of all people, was a good idea.
Stepping into the shower I twist the knobs and
cold water immediately rains onto my skin. I
welcome the freeze as it slowly numbs my skin. As
the water finally starts to warm, I hear the bedroom
door click closed again. In a matter of minutes
Shauna is climbing in right behind me, her body
naked. Her hands slip around my waist and her lips
begin kissing my back.
“I didn’t mean to snap at you,” I say softly
letting my head drop forward.
“I know it’s a lot to take in, but he’s scared
babe,” she says as her fingers trail a line over my
stomach. I suck in a breath before turning around in
her arms. I look down into the depths of her brown
eyes and wonder what she’s doing with me and if
she even realizes that what she wants isn’t
something I can give her?
“I’m glad you’re here,” I tell her honestly
because in this moment, I am. Shauna smiles up at
me just as I lean down to kiss her. Her lips glide
against mine as we taste each other. Fuck. She’s a
good girl and I just can’t seem to help myself
ruining her. She isn’t cut out for this life. She’s
better than this.
“I need to fuck you long and hard,” I breathe
against her mouth.
Shauna moans her agreement. I lift her in my
arms and she wraps her legs around my waist.
Reaching between us I position myself before
plunging inside of her. She’s so fucking wet and
tight. Her body was made to be fucked.
Backing her against the shower wall I pump
into her. The harder I take her the more the
thoughts of Molly swim through my head. She was
so broken lying there. So helpless. What had her
life become? What happened to her after she left
me? Where did she go? With every question that
enters my mind I thrust into Shauna. Her nails dig
into my flesh and the burn just pushes me harder.
Her body slips and slides against mine as I fuck her
without regard. I don’t care if I’m hurting her; I
sure as shit don’t care if she thinks that there is
more to this than there truly is. All that matters is
that I can fill her, fuck her, and make her mine for
the moment.
“Fuck,” I grunt as I pump into her, reaching
behind her I grab a fistful of hair and yank her head
back. Sucking on the base of her throat I feel her
tighten around me. As much as I want this fucking
release, the need to figure out what happened to
Molly is nagging the back of my mind, almost
destroying any chance I have to blow my load. I
don’t know how I’m going to deal with all of this
shit. Shauna, Molly, and a fucking kid? My teeth
sink into Shauna’s flesh as she screams her release.
A few thrusts later and I’m finally able to fill her
with mine. She pants as she catches her breath.
When I pull out of her I let her body slowly fall
until her feet hit the shower floor. Her hands come
up to her throat and she rubs the spot I bit.
“What the fuck where you thinking?”
I’ve never done that to her before. Fuck! I’ve
wanted to, but I know she isn’t into that kind of
thing. My eyes find hers and I know I don’t need to
say anything. It’s like she knows; she can read me.
“I’m not her Reaper. I don’t plan on taking care
of a kid that isn’t mine. You didn’t want that,
remember?”
“You think I asked for that kid? I didn’t even
know he existed!”
“Well, he’s all yours now. You still love her
don’t you?” Her question stuns me a little. I find it
hard to breath, like the air has been knocked from
my lungs. “You don’t need to answer me. I can see
it in your eyes.”
“You can’t see shit,” I mumble. I turn my back
to her and she laughs before I feel her fist slam into
me. I shift and turn quickly and grab her wrists in
my hands.
“You ever put your hands on me like that again
and I’ll watch your dead body rot in the shed. Do I
love her still? Yeah, I fuckin’ do. I also fuckin’ hate
that bitch for runnin’ out on me. Then I find I have
a fuckin’ kid that I didn’t even know about? So
yeah, that pisses me off too. Any other questions
you want answered while we’re doin’ this?” My
anger seethes out of me. I can’t seem to stop it now
that she’s opened that box.
“Do you love me?”
That’s the one question I thought she’d known
the answer to this whole time. Swallowing hard I
release her hands and take a step back under the
cascading water.
“No.”
6
Molly
M
y body aches and my head spins. I feel
like I’ve been run over by a damn train. Turning my
head to the side I pry my eyes open.
“What the hell?” I nearly jump off the bed
pulling wires and other things as I go.
“What’s wrong? You see the devil?” His deep
voice booms through the room. I gasp once more
and slide back down into the safety of the bed. I
pull the blankets up around my body as I watch
him.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I ask.
“Not much. Mostly watchin’ you sleep. Ain’t
much else to do around here. I thought about
stranglin’ you with your IV tube, but then I figured
that sexy little nurse might get pissed,” Roland says
as his eyes never leave mine.
God it’s been so long since I’ve seen him or
heard his voice. Memories crash into me and I can
almost trick myself into believing nothing is
different. However, he is different; we both are. I
knew from the research I was able to do he’d
changed. Looking at him now in person, in my
room, he’s beyond different; a complete stranger.
“Where’s Drake?”
“You mean the kid you just dumped on me?
You just threw him on my doorstep didn’t you? I
thought better of you Mols.” My nickname. He’s
the only one that ever called me Mols.
“I did what I thought was right. He deserves to
be safe,” I tell him.
“Safe. You think what the fuck I do is safe? You
must have lost your goddamn mind woman.” His
voice thunders through the room. I know that he’s
in that club, I don’t know anything about what he
does, but I do get that there are things happening
that aren’t very legal.
“I haven’t seen you in years Roland. I don’t
know what you do now,” I tell him trying to remain
calm.
“Bet you thought that was my fault too, huh?”
Taking the chance I look back up and into his eyes.
The haunted green eyes that used to be so vibrant.
“No.”
“No? So, why don’t you tell me what the fuck
is goin’ on darlin’? The kid doesn’t seem to want to
talk about it. It’s been a fuckin’ week of silent
treatment,” he says, obviously very pissed off. A
week? I’ve been in here a week? “Don’t look so
surprised. Your head was pretty fucked up,” he says
when he sees the look on my face.
“His name is Drake. It isn’t kid.”
“He’s whatever the fuck I wanna call him. You
gonna tell me why you dumped him on my
doorstep?” Oh, he’s pissed. I knew he might be. I
didn’t really think about Roland’s feelings when I
put this plan into action. I didn’t stop to think about
what he might feel.
“Where is he?” I ask again.
“Safe.” The word comes out as a taunt. The
bastard.
“Just take me to him and I’ll figure something
out. I didn’t mean to piss you off and I didn’t mean
to hurt you.”
“Hurt me? By dumpin’ the kid or takin’ off
when we were happy? We were fuckin’ happy
Molly.” I flinch at his words. We were happy.
“I didn’t want to hurt you. That wasn’t the
plan. I wasn’t supposed to have to leave you. It
couldn’t be helped back then Roland.” My voice
waivers and I’m on the edge of tears. I don’t want
to do this with him. I can’t. Not now.
“You’re a selfish bitch. You ran from me. You
kept my son from me. What the fuck else don’t I
know? Huh? Any other surprises for me fuckin’
years later?” he snaps and shoves out of his chair.
Roland stands to his full height and his hard body
takes up most of the space in the room. The air is
thick and I’m finding it hard to look in his eyes.
“I can’t talk about it right now. Just know that
when this is all over I will come back and explain it
all. Just please, take care of Drake.” I near beg him.
When do I bring my eyes up to meet his I can see
his confusion, he doesn’t understand that I can’t
stop until I finish what I’ve started.
“You’ll come back?” he asks as he cocks his
head to the side.
“Yes. I’ll come back and I’ll tell you
everything. I promise.”
Roland takes a few steps toward me and stops
at the edge of my bed. His hands rest on the
mattress right next to me. He leans in, his eyes are
one mine, blazing like a fire.
“You’ll come back? No darlin’. You won’t
come back. Do you know why?” he asks with his
teeth grinding together. Tears pool in my eyes as the
air is sucked form my lungs. “You won’t come back
because you aren’t runnin’ away again. You’re
gonna tell me what the fuck is goin’ on and you
aren’t goin’ anywhere until you do.” His eyes stay
on mine a second longer before he stands and heads
toward the door.
“You can’t keep me hostage,” I yell. Roland
turns to face me with sinister smile on his face.
“I can do whatever the hell I want. You aren’t
in any position to make any kind of fuckin’
demands.” He crosses his arms over his massive
chest and glares at me.
“I’m leaving this hospital and there is nothing
you can do to stop me,” I sneer. Roland nods his
head and a small smile appears on his face. He
reaches for the door handle and pulls it open.
“Prospect!” he yells. Another man steps into
the room wearing the same kind of vest as his.
“Yeah Reaper?” Reaper? What the hell is that?
I watch the evil in his eyes and it all slowly makes
sense.
“The lady here thinks that when the doc says
she can, she’s leavin’. What do you think about
that?” Roland’s eyes stay glued to mine as he talks
to the other man.
“She ain’t goin’ anywhere.”
“And why is that?”
“Because you gave me orders Reaper. I follow
orders.”
“See? You don’t call the fuckin’ shots anymore
sweetheart. You try and take one step out of this
room, and my prospect here will make sure you
regret it.” My mouth gapes open as I watch the
look in his eyes.
“You can’t do that. I’ll call the police,” I tell
him.
Both of them chuckle and exchange a look
before Roland stalks back toward my bed. Leaning
over me once more he says, “Call them. You want
cops? I got cops. You want a lawyer? I got that too.
Drugs? Sex? Women? I got it all baby.”
7
Reaper
I
sit with my arms crossed over my chest and
glare at her. She’s been here for a few weeks now
and I can’t get enough of watching the way she is
with Drake. She’s a good mom regardless of what I
first thought. It’s obvious she loves the boy.
“You holdin’ up okay with all this?” Fin asks
while passing me a beer. I take it from him and take
a long pull.
“I dunno what the fuck I’m supposed to be
doin’. She keeps her mouth shut and doesn’t give
me even a fuckin’ hint of what happened.”
“She’s still healin’ brother. Give her time.
Maybe take her out?” I turn my head to the side to
look at him and he just laughs and shrugs. “What?
Maybe she needs a little of the past to show her the
future,” he adds.
Shaking my head at him I look back at Mols.
She’s smiling while talking to Taz and playing a
game with Drake. It makes me wonder what our
lives would have been like if she hadn’t run away
from me.
“Don’t know that there’s a future there Fin,” I
admit.
“Why not? You still love her.”
“We’re different people now. I wasn’t what I
am back then.” I let my voice trail off as I shake
my head.
“Maybe not, but that doesn’t mean you two
can’t fall for each other all over again,” he says. I
chuckle and look over at him.
“You watchin’ them goddamn talk shows
again?” Fin shrugs making me laugh even harder.
When I pull my gaze from his and back to them, I
gasp. Molly is staring right at me. Her eyes are
burning with a fire that I’ve always loved in her.
She’s always been focused and knew exactly what
she wanted. That fire would burn bright as hell
when she wanted something. All she ever had to do
was take it.
“See that? I told you,” Fin leans over and says
to me. I can’t stop staring at her. Even with the
bruises fading and the cuts healing she’s gorgeous.
Just like I remember her being all those years ago.
“Hey Reaper. Come over here,” Viking yells
from near the bar. I reluctantly pull my ass off the
chair I’d been sitting in and walk toward him.
“What’s up?”
“A few things. Mayhem called. Declan took
that meet with Jimmy instead of Smokey.” What
the fuck? Why the hell would he do that?
“You gotta be shittin’ me?”
“Not at all brother. Smokey told Jimmy if he set
foot in So Cal that his ass was on the firin’ line,”
Viking says with a grin.
“Why would Dec take that shit?”
“He wants to find out what the little shit is
plannin’. I told him to stay away from it, but after
talkin’ it over with Ruger and Mayhem they
decided to take it.”
“Yeah he’s still there, but you know he has
attachments in No Cal.” I nod my head. I already
know all that. We’re all family.
“When is that shit set for?” I ask leaning against
the bar.
“Next week. Mystic is pullin’ all he can first.
Jimmy has been silent since he stepped out of the
pen.”
Not that I expected him to be anything but
silent. Jimmy is like a lost dog that will follow you
around for scraps until you don’t feed him fast
enough. Then he’ll bite.
“Heard that.”
“Oh shit, this should be good,” Ink mumbles
from behind me.
Viking and I both turn to look at him. Then I see
Shauna walking in the front doors. I haven’t seen
her since the night I bit her.
“Fuck,” I grumble under my breath causing
them all to laugh. Bastards.
“You ain’t seen her since Molly’s been here,
huh?” Viking asks with a smile on his fucking face.
I want to punch it the fuck off too.
“Nope. Didn’t plan on it either.”
Shoving off the bar I walk toward her. Her eyes
stay on mine making my nerves fire off. I don’t
need any more drama in my life right now, I also
don’t need a fight either.
“What are you doin’ here?” I ask as I slip my
hands into my pockets.
“I miss you. I just wanted to say that I’m sorry
about that night. I know I said things I shouldn’t
have. I know that you love me in your own way.”
Oh hell, I have to stop her there. “No, you
don’t get it. I don’t love you in any way Shauna. I
care about you, I like you, but I don’t love you.”
Her nostrils flare, but she looks like I just slapped
her.
“Because of her?” Shauna screams pointing at
Molly. Everyone’s attention is now on us. Fuck, this
is just what I needed, center stage in the Shauna
show.
“Don’t raise your voice to me,” I warn her.
Shauna huffs, but stands her ground.
“Tell me, is it because she came back? Is that
it? I can make her disappear,” Shauna snaps, but so
do I.
I wrap my hand around her throat and lift her
nearly off the ground. I slam her against the wall.
My voice nothing more than whispered snarl I tell
her, “You ever step foot in my motherfuckin’ club
and threaten someone and it’ll be the last thing you
ever do. You got me?”
Her eyes are wide as she struggles for air. I
don’t let her go, at least not until I feel her hands on
my arm. Jerking my head to the side I look down
into the most beautiful brown eyes I’ve ever seen in
my life. These are the eyes that were my world.
They were my safety. The eyes that were my
heaven and have since become my hell.
“Drake can see you. Please,” Molly begs softly.
I watch her face and study her a minute. This is
the first time in weeks that she’s touched me. Her
fingers are like a flame. They are burning me to my
core. I slowly let my fingers unwrap from Shauna’s
neck, but my eyes stay locked with Molly’s. She
doesn’t break eye contact either even while Shauna
coughs next to us. My arm falls to my side and my
heart is beating wildly in my chest.
“You fucked up! You’ll pay for that shit
Reaper,” Shauna shrieks next to us.
I start to move, but Molly tightens her grip on
me. I’m crumbling. I’m losing a fucking battle that I
didn’t even know I was having with her. Slowly I’m
letting her suck me back into a past that I’ve
always wanted, one I’ve always grieved over.
When she pushes up on her toes and her lips touch
mine, that’s all that matters. Everything else
explodes around me. My heart beats in my ears. I
can’t hear Shauna yelling or the guys talking. There
is nothing but us. The us that we once were. The us
that I’ve always yearned for, but never got back.
She’s here.
Breaking our kiss, I notice that Shauna is gone
and Fin is standing next to us with a smirk on his
face and just looking between the two of us.
“What the fuck are you lookin’ at?” I ask him.
He just laughs.
“Ex-girlfriend and ex-wife showdown brother. I
thought it was about to get good,” he says through a
laugh.
“I’m not his ex-wife,” Molly says pulling both
of our attention to her.
“What?” both Fin and I ask in unison.
“We’re not divorced,” she says softly while
looking down at the floor. She didn’t divorce me?
“Well, not unless you filed for it.” She looks up at
me and my heart sinks in my chest. What the fuck.
“I didn’t file,” I tell her.
“Me either.”
8
Molly
I
’m not sure that I should have blurted that out.
Roland watches me, but he doesn’t say a word. He
just stands there looking stunned. When he starts to
open his mouth, I turn on my heel and take off. I
run right past both Duke and Taz and out the side
door desperately needing some air. Sucking in
lungful’s I bend over and rest my hands on my
knees.
Tom tried. He tried to force me to get a divorce,
but I wouldn’t do it. I refused to give him that last
piece of me.
“Why?” God, that voice still sends chills up my
spine.
“What do you mean why?”
“Don’t fuck with me Molly,” he growls. I shove
myself up and turn to face him. His eyes hold some
restraint that his body seems to be fighting. His
muscles are solid and coiled tightly.
“It wasn’t on my mind Roland. In case you
didn’t notice I was trying to raise a son,” I snap at
him. His lips curl into a smirk that pisses me off.
“I don’t know how good a job you’ve been
doin’ there darlin’. You show up dumpin’ the kid on
me with your blood drippin’ down your face and
you wanna tell me you’ve been busy raisin’ our
kid?”
I hate him. I hate what he’s become, who he is.
This is not the man I married and loved. He’s
insane; a monster. How dare he question me like
that?
“I’ve lived through hell for years. I have done
the best I could with him given the circumstances.
How dare you say that I’m not a good mom?” I cry.
Sobs choke me as tears spill down my cheeks.
Roland sighs and moves toward me. The thought of
backing away from him and running again has
crossed my mind a million times in the last thirty
seconds. When he pulls me into his arms, I lose it. I
cry, the cries quickly turn into sobs, and just let him
hold me.
“I’m sorry Mols. I don’t know what the hell
you went through. I shouldn’t have said that to
you.” His words sound sincere, but this man, the
one holding me, is not the same man and sadly, I’m
not the same woman.
“I tried so hard. All I wanted was for him to be
happy,” I start to cry even harder. Roland tightens
his arms around me.
“I know baby. I know.”
“Mom?” Drake’s voice causes me to pull away.
He lets me go, but his face says he didn’t want to. I
immediately miss the smell of him and the warmth
of his arms around me.
“I’m okay. I’m sorry Drake. I didn’t mean to
scare you,” I tell him as he walks around Roland
and looks up at me.
“Did he hurt you? I told you I would get
stronger and protect you mom,” Drake yells.
Grabbing his arm Roland spins him around to face
him. I’m about to step in, but I want to see if I
fucked up by bringing him here.
“One thing you’re gonna learn about me is that
I would never hurt your mom. You’re a kid, and
that’s all you need to be. No one is gonna hurt her
ever again. You get me?” His tone has calmed, but I
can still see the fight in him. Drake swallows and
looks up at his dad.
“I need to protect her. You weren’t there. You
didn’t see what Tom did to her,” his shout fills the
silence and when Roland gasps, I know he heard
him. His eyes leap to mine.
“Tom? The same fuckin’ Tom? Tell me it isn’t
him Molly. You didn’t fuckin’ live with him.” His
hand releases Drake who quickly moves to my side.
“Don’t yell at her. You didn’t want us,” Drake
yells.
“Drake stop it,” I warn him. Roland’s head
cocks to the side as his eyes dance between both
Drake and me.
“I didn’t?” he asks.
“You left us to be hurt. I’m a smart boy, I
figured it out!” Drake’s voice gets even louder.
“Stop. Just stop it!”
“Just in case your mom didn’t tell you, I didn’t
know about you kid, she ran from me. I didn’t
leave her. She left me!” Roland hisses each word as
if they were venom. Drake’s eyes jerk to mine and
sadness fills his face.
“You said dad left us. That he didn’t want me,”
his sad tone only rips my chest apart.
“You told him I didn’t want him?” Roland roars
louder. The side door opens and slams closed again.
“Why don’t we calm down?” I look around
Roland as the guy I know as Fin walks up to us. He
bends down and looks Drake in the eye. “Why
don’t you run inside and find Taz? I think she was
wonderin’ what to make for dinner that you’d like,”
he tells him.
Drake nods and starts to walk away, but not
before giving me one last glance. My chest
constricts as I watch my son walk away. Fin steps
up next to me and tosses his arm over my shoulder.
“I think the kid has been through enough. Don’t
you? You two fightin’ isn’t helpin’ shit,” Fin says.
Roland is vibrating with anger. You can see it all
over him, his eyes are black and his hands are
clenched at his sides.
“She told my son I didn’t want him,” Roland
growls.
“It was for his own protection,” I scream.
“You left me,” he roars.
“I was protecting you!” The words fall from my
mouth in a fit of rage and anger. I didn’t mean to
say them. Not out loud.
“What?” he asks. Fin’s arm falls from my
shoulders as he moves off to the side to listen.
“Tom found us Roland. I was getting ready to
come home and surprise you when he stopped me. I
was planning to surprise you with a bunch of baby
stuff. He caught on.” My voice catches in my
throat. Roland stands there stunned by what I’m
telling him, but I can’t stop now. I have to tell him
everything.
“What the fuck?” he asks more to himself.
Shaking his head, he runs his hand through his hair,
and tugs.
“He said that if I didn’t do what he said that he
had proof you killed Ray. I saw it Roland. He
showed it to me over and over. The same fucking
scene.”
“You couldn’t get away? For almost ten fuckin’
years?” he asks as if he doesn’t believe me. I lean
down and slowly pull my pant leg up. His eyes
move down to my leg to the scar that remains as a
reminder of my time with Tom. “He chained you
up? Like a fuckin’ animal?” His voice booms
around us making me to jump. Fin curses under his
breath next to me.
“When Drake was eight, he started letting me
loose for a little while, he was usually home though.
I tried to run a few times, and every time I did he
caught me and he beat me. I tried. I really tried,” I
find myself screaming back at him. Roland stands
still not knowing what to say.
“He hit my son?” His eyes come to meet mine.
My heart flutters in my chest.
“A few times, yes. Nothing too bad. I would
always get his attention back on me.” I watch
Roland closes his eyes while trying to rein in his
anger.
“Where is he? Where did he have you?” His
voice has calmed slightly.
“About twenty minutes from here.”
Roland’s mouth falls open. “Twenty fuckin’
minutes? You’ve been twenty goddamn minutes
away this whole time? Son of a bitch!” he roars.
9
Reaper
M
y fist slams into the brick wall over and
over until it goes numb. Fin doesn’t even try to stop
me, but Molly does. She slinks under my arms and
wraps her arms around my waist. I sigh, but I can’t
hold her. Not right now. I want to snap her fucking
neck, and I don’t know why. I want her to feel the
same pain I do. It’s unfair. I know it is.
“I’m sorry. I tried to get away. I really did,” she
cries.
Fuck! Wrapping my arms around her, my
bloody hands hold her close while she cries. I savor
this moment in time with her. We’re just like we
used to be. I hold her, just caring for her.
“I’m gonna go check on Drake,” Fin says. I
give him a nod and watch him walk back inside.
“I need to know everything babe. I need to
know all of it, so I can handle him.”
“He still has the proof. He said he’d turn it in
Roland. I won’t let you go to jail.”
I chuckle. Sure, that’s what’s been stopping me.
If that’s what she thinks then she’s been hit in the
head too hard.
“He stole my world, Mols. Don’t you get that?
He stole you and my son. I’m going after him. I
don’t give a shit what you say, it isn’t even up for
discussion,” I inform her.
“Not right away you aren’t,” Viking’s voice
comes from next to us. I turn my head and look at
him.
“What the fuck does that mean?”
“That means that I just got word and they’re
pullin’ a warrant for your arrest brother. You need
to spend the night with your family. They’ll be here
in the mornin’.”
I shake my head. There is no way in fuck.
“Fuck that shit. I ain’t goin’,” I tell him letting my
hands fall from Molly. She takes a step back and I
see her eyes are wild.
“You don’t have a choice. I called the lawyer.
He’s on it already, but he said you gotta go in
before he can get you back out.” Viking turns and
walks away leaving me to my thoughts.
“I’m so sorry.” Her voice is full of tears. Letting
my head drop forward I don’t know what the fuck
I’m doing anymore.
“I need to ask you somethin’ and I need a real
answer.”
“Anything.”
“Do you still love me?” It’s the same question
that has burned in the back of my mind for years
now. It’s the constant ache in my chest. Everything
down to this one question.
“I’ve never stopped loving you Roland. I’ve
always loved you. I just wanted to do what was
right.”
I turn quickly and pull her into my arms and
kiss her like I’ve never kissed her before. I kiss her
until she can’t breathe. I want to invade her and
suck the life from her and into me. I need her.
“Stay with me tonight,” I nearly beg her. I don’t
know when I’ll see her or Drake again.
“What about Drake?”
“He’s stayin’ too, but I need some time with
just you baby.”
Molly nods her head as I lift her into my arms. I
head in the side door and walk us straight to my
room. I kick the door closed behind me, and then
set Molly on her feet.
“Take it off. Everything. I need to see you,” I
demand in a low, rough voice.
Molly moves quickly taking her clothes off and
showing me what I’ve been missing all this time.
Swallowing hard I take her in as she stands before
me. Her perfect skin, taut nipples. Fuck I’ve missed
the sight of her.
“You’ve always been the most beautiful girl
I’ve ever seen.”
I pull my cut down my arms and toss it onto the
chair as I work to free myself of my clothes. It’s
been far too long since I’ve had her like this, and
far too long since I’ve felt the world spin again.
When I’m completely naked and in front of her,
she gasps. Her eyes move over my body tracing
every line, every muscle, every tattoo, and every
crevice on me before she makes it up to my eyes.
I’ve gained weight, muscles, and scars as a
reminder of who I am now.
“You’re much bigger than you were,” she
whispers softly.
“Don’t you like it?” I ask as I move slowly
toward her.
As much as I want to throw her down and fuck
her roughly, I can’t. Not when I don’t know when
I’ll see her again. When I reach for her, she shivers.
Smirking I lean down and capture her lips with
mine. My hands hook around her hips and I pull her
into me. Molly moans into my mouth and I almost
lose my concentration.
Walking her backward toward the bed I slowly
lay her down and climb between her thighs. I can’t
wait any longer, reaching between us I slowly push
my way inside of her. Molly begins to pant and it’s
the sexiest thing I’ve heard in a long ass time. My
hands slide up and down her side. I stop so I can lift
her thigh up.
“This feel like the first time Mols,” I whisper.
Her eyes lock with mine as I begin to slowly
thrust. She takes each one and raises her hips up to
meet me. The slowness. The connection. It’s
everything that I need in my life. It’s everything
I’ve missed. I may have ended up a Soulless
Bastard, but this woman owns my heart. She
always has and I won’t let that go. I can’t.
“Ro I love you. I always have,” Molly’s eyes
fill with tears. I lean down and kiss each eye before
I press my lips to hers.
“It’s okay. You’re here now. We’re both here. I
will never let anything happen to you again. You
hear me?”
My lips hover over hers as I slowly move in and
out of her. Molly nods her head as her body arches
up into me. As much as I wanted to take this slow, I
just can’t stop myself from speeding up. Thrusts
become harder, deeper. I push up on my hands and
Molly wraps her legs around my waist. In this
position she holds nothing back. Not one fucking
thing.
“Goddamn. It’s been too fuckin’ long,” I groan.
Plunging in even deeper I growl as my release
washes over me. Molly clings to me like she may
never get the chance to touch me again. She cries
as she comes with me. I hate this. I hate that she’s
been carrying around my fucking burdens for this
long. She’s had to deal with this all on her own and
try to raise our son. When I pull out of Molly I
laugh and lay down next to her. I pull her into my
side and sigh. Every fiber inside of me wants him
dead.
“I wished I’d known Mols. I would have come
for you. I thought… fuck I thought you didn’t want
me anymore. I thought you left me. There was no
other explanation.”
Molly snuggles into my side as her fingers
splayed over my abs. “I would have never left you
if I’d had a choice. I never wanted to Ro. He found
me and I didn’t have a choice. I couldn’t let you go
to prison for defending me. It was my fault you
were even in that position,” she says softly.
“No, it wasn’t your fuckin’ fault Molly. Nothin’
was your fault.”
“I failed anyway. You’re still going to prison.”
“Stop it Molly. Just let me have tonight, okay?
We’ll figure this out. I promise.”
A knock at the door stirs both of us. I climb up
and slide my jeans back on. Pulling the door back
open I find Taz standing there with Drake.
“He was looking for his mom,” she says.
I nod once and push the door the rest of the
way open. “Thanks Taz.”
“No problem, he’s a sweet kid.”
Drake rushes past me and into the room. He
throws himself into his mom’s arms. I close the
door and just watch them together. I see everything
I’ve missed already, and everything I’m going to
miss when they come for me tomorrow. My
stomach drops at the thought.
I just got them back. How can I lose them all
over again?
10
Molly
W
e spent the whole night awake and
together. Drake really is a lot like his dad. I’d never
noticed the similarities in their personalities until I
watched them play games together. I couldn’t
believe just how alike they are. Standing here
watching him say goodbye to his son is killing me,
ripping my heart right out of my chest. I feel like
I’m drowning and there’s nothing I can do to stop
it.
Drake smiles up at Ro like he’s the best person
in the world, and to us he is. When he hugs and
kisses him one more time I almost lose it. Roland
turns on his heel and walks toward me with his
head held high. If this is hurting him, like I suspect
it is, he isn’t showing it. I suppose he’s toughened
up over the years. Stopping in front of me he rests
his hands on my shoulders.
“You’ll be safe here. The guys will take care of
you. Anything you need, you let them know. I’d
rather you stay here than at the house, but if you
feel more comfortable at my place Viking will set
someone up outside. I don’t want you two alone
anywhere. You get me?”
His eyes tell me to agree. I don’t want all this. I
just want him. A tear slips down my cheek as
Roland shakes his head.
“No tears babe. I’m not dead. Just promise me
that you’ll stay here or with one of the guys.
Yeah?”
I nod my head and he pulls me into his chest.
Roland kisses the top of my head before he pulls
away. The cops are already here with the warrant,
but since they knew a few of the cops they were
giving him some time to say goodbye. Roland kisses
me roughly before he takes a step back.
“I meant what I said. Stay,” he reminds me. I
nod once more when he turns and heads to the
door. Fins steps up next to me and puts his arm
around my shoulder.
“He’ll get back out, don’t you worry, we got a
good lawyer.”
If only that were true. In my heart I know that
he could be there for a long time with the evidence
that Tom has on him. It was all filmed. The entire
assault. Of course there was no sound, but you
could clearly see Roland beating him to death. My
stomach trembles as a sob escapes me. Fin pulls me
even closer and doesn’t let me go.
I watch Roland say his goodbyes to a few of the
guys before the cops put the cuffs on him. His eyes
stay on mine the whole time until they pull him out
of the door.
“Okay, show’s over. Get your asses back to
work. Lawyer’s on his way. I want church in ten,”
Viking roars as he storms toward a closed door.
“What’s church?” I ask looking to Fin for
answers.
“It’s a meetin’. You can’t go in. Sorry babe. I’ll
let you know what I can. Go help the girls in the
kitchen.”
Fin presses a quick kiss to my temple before he
walks away. My heart doesn’t know what to do.
The thought that Roland could be in there for a
long time is killing me. It’s my fault.
“Mom?” Looking down at Drake I choke. He
just met him. He just got his kid back and now he’s
lost him again.
“It’s okay. Everything is going to be okay,” I
tell him as I pull him into my arms.
I watch as the men all shuffle into a door at the
side of the room. When Drake and I are alone I let
out a sigh. I don’t know what this would entail. I
don’t know what kind of madness I just walked
into, but Roland was right. I do feel safe here.
“Let’s go to the kitchen and see what we can
help with,” I tell Drake as I nudge him toward the
door.
He walks with his hand wrapped tightly around
mine. Pushing through the door a few of the girls
look up and smile while the rest just ignore us. You
can tell which ones belong to one of the guys and
which ones are the club whores I’ve heard about.
I’ve sat back and watched a few of them and I’m
not sure what I should think.
“Hey, come try this,” Taz says to Drake holding
out a spoon full of chocolate. He walks over to her
slowly and takes the spoon from her.
“Oh, that’s good,” he squeals.
I smile when another girl I think I might’ve met
already walks up next to me. She throws her arm
around my shoulder and leans in close to me. “In
case you forgot, I’m Whitley or Whit. Whatever
the hell you want to call me. I love your hair,” she
says leaning in close to smell my hair as another girl
rolls her eyes.
“You have to ignore Whit. When Mason lets
her out of her sex cave she just runs wild. I’m Tink
by the way,” the small girl flounces over to me with
her hand outstretched. I take it in mine.
“Molly.”
“Oh, I know who you are. Reaper made it clear
you were off limits to us girls. Especially to Whit,”
she says sticking her tongue out at the other
woman. I smile at the two of them.
“Mason didn’t say I couldn’t touch,” Whitley
says as she starts stroking my hair and making me
feel slightly uncomfortable.
“Mason did say not to touch. What the fuck are
you doin’ baby?” a deep voice booms from behind
us. Whitley quickly pulls her hand away from mine
and spins to face the voice.
“I wasn’t doing anything you wouldn’t like to
watch,” she giggles.
“I bet. Get over here,” he tells her. I turn and
watch as she leaps into his arms.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” she whispers into his
ear loud enough that everyone can hear her.
“Me too. Get to cooking. I need to talk to
Molly.”
My eyes widen when he says my name. I’ve
heard about Mason. That he’s the VP of this club,
but I haven’t had the chance to meet him. He’s
been out on some run as they called it. Whit kisses
him once more before heading back to what she
was doing before.
“You got a minute?” he asks me. I nod once and
follow him out of the kitchen.
“I’m Mason. I know all about you and your
situation. I just wanted to let you know that as long
as you’re here you are protected. That fuck that
had you did turn in the video. Our lawyer is fighting
it, but he might be in there a little bit longer. The
house you told him about has been wiped clean.”
I’m confused. Wiped clean?
“What do you mean?”
“I mean there is no proof that you were ever
there. This was all we found,” Mason says passing
me a piece of paper.
I take it with shaking hands and slowly unfold
it. I read the words, “You made a mistake. You
know where I’ll be, but if you want him free then
you come alone.”
11
Reaper
I
roll my shoulders, my hands are clenched, and
I’m ready to swing. The bastard on the other side of
the bag holds it tightly; anticipating my punch.
When I finally throw it he nearly falls to the ground
and that just angers me further.
“You can’t even hold a goddamn bag?” I roar as
the punk tries to right himself. He grabs the bag
again, but before I can throw another blow
someone moves in next to him.
“I’ll take it from here,” the man says ushering
the kid out of the way. He grabs a hold of the bag
and steadies it with his hands, nodding at me when
he’s ready. I take out my frustrations on the bag.
Over and over I punch until my knuckles are raw.
“That’s some power you have,” he says as he
moves to stand next to the punching bag.
“What is it you want? Let’s not pretend I don’t
know who the fuck you are,” I grit my teeth as I
look at him. Prison. It’s hell on earth. It’s four walls
that keep you trapped in your own head with no
way out. This has been my house for the last few
months. I miss my boys, my club, Molly, and my
son.
“I can help with your little situation.”
I shake my head, take a step back, and lean
against the fence with my arms crossed over my
chest. Mexican human trafficker Julio Ramirez.
Never thought I’d come face to face with this piece
of shit, but here he is.
“What makes you think I have a situation?”
“Oh come on now Reaper. I know what
happens in here. This is my domain. I’m doing a life
sentence man. Don’t fucking play games with me.”
“What do you want Ramirez?”
I’m over playing nice. I’m over trying to skirt
my way around these fucking assholes. They are
like goddamn vultures ready to swoop in on a
person.
“You see that group over my shoulder? That’s
the boys of the Old Dirty Fliers MC. You know
what they are now?”
I shake my head because I don’t know shit
about them. I’ve heard about them over the years,
but the majority of them had been locked up for
some reason or another. They are basically
nonexistent outside of these walls.
“They are now the Maniac Clan. Hooked up
with the inner workings of the Brotherhood ever
since they got in. The Brotherhood used it to their
advantage even though over half of them are as
racist as they come. Doesn’t really mean shit in
these walls though. You know what I mean?”
“If you have a reason for this shit then get to it
Ramirez,” I snap as he chuckles.
“Who do you think they are looking at right
now?” he asks.
I glance over his shoulder and blow out a breath
before I mumble, “fuck.”
“Exactly. The ass fuck that turned you in,
Thomas Roden? He’s a Brotherhood member.”
My eyes jerk up to his. How the fuck is that
even possible? He had Molly and Drake the whole
time. There is no way he could have been locked
up.
“I know what you’re thinking. They are
forming alliances outside these walls have been for
years. No one really saw it until recently. The
dynamics of the game are changing. These assholes
want to run everything they can get their hands on.
My guys on the outside even ran into a few of them
in West Texas. Had no fucking clue who they were
or what they wanted until it was too late. Killed six
of my best guys out there,” he says with a faraway
look in his eyes.
“What’s that mean for me?”
“For you? Means a lot Reaper. It means that
your club is in danger. It means that your family is
in danger. I can guarantee that Tom isn’t working
alone. There has to be some kind of connection to
your girl that he has. I don’t know what, but it’s
there.”
His words linger in my mind. What kind of
connection could he have to her? Molly is a good
girl. Always has been. She was never in any trouble
or around anything that would put her on a radar
like theirs.
“I don’t know anything man. Molly was just a
girl all those years ago. I wasn’t even in this shit
back when I met her,” I tell him.
He shrugs his shoulders and glances around.
“Can’t piece that together for you. I just know
what I know Reaper. Those bastards know
something.”
“What do you want from me?” I ask him
knowing that this friendly little heads up wasn’t for
nothing.
“I want a partner.”
“We don’t deal in humans Ramirez. We never
will.”
“No, but you deal in guns.”
“What are you sayin’? You want in on guns?”
Ramirez nods his head slowly before glancing
behind him before pulling his gaze back to mine to
say, “These fucks not only killed a few of my guys.
They killed my sister. It would be easy for me to
call in the hounds and let them shoot to kill, but
where’s the fun in that? One of them on the inside
ordered the hit. I want your help finding out which
one it was. I need you to make nice with them. Get
inside.”
I laugh. Fuck that. Fuck him. “Nice fuckin’ try
man.” I start to walk past him when he grabs my
shoulder. I take a step back and he looks me in the
eye.
“I can get you Tom on the inside. Let your
lawyer work this from there. The day they say you
can walk I’ll pass you the information.”
Fuck. I don’t need to be mixed up in this shit
with him. Being here is bad enough, but having to
deal with this shit too? This is more than I was
bargaining for. I just want to do my time. That’s
what the lawyer keeps telling me. Don’t get into
any trouble and don’t give them any reason to keep
my ass in here.
“Goddamn it,” I growl as I run my hand
through my hair. I have Thomas right at my
fingertips, but I’m stepping into the lion’s den with
Ramirez. This is something I might not make it out
of.
“You said you didn’t know where he was?” I
deadpan.
“Insurance my brother.”
“I’m not your goddamn brother.”
“We have a deal?”
“Fuck Ramirez. Yeah, we have a deal.”
“Good. Now we have to have a little fight to
make this meeting look authentic,” he says right
before his fist collides with my face.
12
Molly
I
fidget with the hem of my shirt as we wait to
be ushered into the visitation room. Viking stands
tall not looking nervous at all. It’s been months
since I’ve seen him. My heart hurts just from
thinking about him being in here. It’s all my fault. If
I hadn’t run away from Tom none of this would be
happening. I can’t believe that he actually turned
that video in. I wish none of this had ever
happened.
“Stop fuckin’ movin’ so much. You’ll draw
attention that we don’t fuckin’ need,” Viking growls
at me. I quickly drop my hands to my sides. “Shit,
I’m sorry Molly. I know this is all new to you. They
see you actin’ all jittery like that they could pull his
visitation rights,” he informs me.
“I’m sorry. I’m just nervous. What if he hates
me? What if he doesn’t want to see me?” Viking
chuckles and throws an arm around my shoulders.
“Darlin’ he wants to see you. I promise. He
doesn’t hate you either. This was a shit situation,
but we’re handlin’ it. It just takes time to get shit
straightened out.”
I take a deep breath and nod my head, when we
hear, “Visitors for Sanders, Roland,” called out.
Viking pushes me forward to make me start
walking, but he stays attached to me.
“No physical contact of any kind,” the asshole
says. I nod my head as Viking chuckles. He opens
the door and ushers us inside before he says, “table
six.” Viking and I walk through the room until my
eyes land of his. Those green orbs of pure light
shine back at me so brightly. I gasp and my feet
refuse to move any further.
Viking leans down to whisper in my ear,
“Remember what I told you. Keep walkin’ and stay
strong.” I nod my head once more and walk as
Roland’s eyes dance over my body from head to
toe. He doesn’t stop looking until we reach the
table. He stands quickly and moves around the
table so he can pull me into a hug. It only lasts a
second before he steps back and his warmth
disappears.
“Sit down before I get in trouble,” he says as he
smiles at me. I sit in the chair across from him as
Viking takes the seat next to me. He nods at Viking,
but quickly drags his gaze back to mine.
“God you look so fuckin’ gorgeous.” His words
send heat rushing through me. I can feel it as my
cheeks heat.
“Well, you look like shit. What the fuck
happened to your face?” Viking asks the question
that I’ve been wanting to ask. Roland’s eye is
swollen and his lip is busted.
“Had a little misunderstandin’ of sorts,” he says
while grinning.
“A little, huh? Looks more like a lot. They got
ears?” Viking asks.
I’m so confused. I have no idea what the hell
they’re talking about.
“No, but that doesn’t mean shit. You know
that,” Roland tells him. Viking lets out a loud huff
next to me.
“There’s a business deal happenin’. Not by
choice either. It’s not just an inside matter either,”
Roland says. Viking growls low in his throat next to
me.
“Can I ask who it is?”
“The Brotherhood. Old MC mixed with some
very aggressive bastards that you wouldn’t even
think could be involved. Even has a little Ramirez
sprinkled in the mix.”
Their cryptic talk means absolutely nothing to
me. None of what either of them have said makes
any sense to me. It’s like a foreign language.
“This somethin’ I need to call church on?”
Viking asks as I try to follow their conversation.
“No, I’ve got it handled. You probably won’t
like what it is, but I don’t have a choice in the
matter,” Roland responds.
“What the hell does that mean?” I ask looking
between the two of them. Roland laughs and Viking
leans back in his chair with a pissed off look on his
eyes.
“Nothin’ you need to worry about darlin’. How
are you holdin’ up?” Roland asks me. His eyes are
on fire. God I’ve missed him.
“I don’t know. Drake keeps asking for you. He
wants to know when he can see you again. I don’t
know what to tell him. I don’t belong at your club
Roland,” I admit. That’s the first time I’ve admitted
it out loud. Roland’s eyes shift to Viking’s before
they come back to meet mine.
“I’m gonna let you two talk. I’ll wait out front
for you Molly. Keep your head down as much as
you can brother,” Viking stands and walks out of
the room leaving Roland and I alone.
“What’s happenin’ at the club?” His eyes hold
so much concern in them. It’s almost amusing
considering where he’s at.
“I just don’t like being there. I don’t fit in.”
“Babe if someone is messin’ with you go to
Mason or Viking.”
“They aren’t. I just feel like a burden there. I
feel like they all look at me like this is all my fault,
and they are right, it is,” I tell him. Roland’s face
hardens.
“None of this is your fault. Do you hear me?
Look at me Mols.” I tip my head up to look at him
as tears fill my eyes. “This isn’t on you. Tom
fucked all of us, but I promise you I’m gonna make
it right. Okay? How’s my boy? He in school yet?”
I reach up and wipe my tears. “No. Taz is
homeschooling him for now. I was going to, but he
seems to really like her. Mason said he thought it
was the best idea until everything is all worked out.
He misses you. We talked about you, and he knows
what happened wasn’t your fault, that I lied to him,
telling him what I thought he needed to hear.
Letting him believe you didn’t want him back then
was just easier,” I admit.
“Fuck I want to hold you so bad right now. It’s
okay Mols. Just hold on for me. Yeah? Don’t run
this time. I need you now more than ever.”
Looking into his eyes I can see how much he
means it. I know he needs me the same way I need
him.
“I need you too,” I whisper.
“Time’s up!” the guard yells from over
Roland’s shoulder. Roland gives me a sad smile
before he stands up.
“Stay strong for me baby. I mean it. When this
is over I don’t want to have to chase you down. I
want you waitin’ on me. Got it?”
Shoving out of my seat I stand up as well.
Roland peeks over his shoulder before reaching for
me. He pulls me into another quick hug, kisses my
neck, and whispers, “I love you more than my own
life.”
When he pulls away my heart falls in my chest.
His eyes are bright as he walks backwards away
from me still watching me. As he reaches the door
he gives me a wink and a smile. I raise my hand and
give him a small wave as I watch him go back into
the darkness that he now has to live in. All because
of me.
13
Molly
“E
verything is all fucked up Fin,” I tell
him yet again.
Fin chuckles but doesn’t say anything in return.
He waves the waitress over and orders more drinks.
“That it is but have a little faith darlin’. He’s
doin’ what he thinks is right. When you’re locked
up in hell, you have no choice but to make some
deals with the devil. That’s all he’s doin’. He’s
protectin’ his ass at any cost.”
His words do very little to soothe me, but I can
see his point. Fin has been a lifesaver the last few
months. He’s always there when either Drake or I
need him. He’s always at making sure we’re
comfortable.
The waitress comes back and sets our drinks on
the table. “Anything else?” she asks while eyeing
Fin like he’s a piece of meat. I find myself giggling
as she eyes him like that.
“Nope, I’ve got everything I need. Thanks,” he
dismisses her quickly. She huffs, turns on her heel,
and stomps back toward the register. I can’t stop
the laughter that erupts out of me.
“What?”
“You don’t see it do you? That girl was totally
flirting with you.”
“She wasn’t flirtin’.”
“Uh yeah, she was. Oh my gosh. How can you
not see it?” I laugh even harder. Fin looks over at
the waitress then back to me. That lopsided grin is
back on his face.
“I suppose I was just enjoyin’ the company I
already have,” he says softly.
I stop laughing and grab my drink to suck down
half of the water in the glass. “Do you think the
lawyer is really working on Roland’s case?” I have
to know what he thinks. I need to know.
Fin nods his head before looking up at me and
saying, “I know he is. It just takes time Molly. He’s
in there for murder. We can’t just snap our fingers
and think they’re going to just let him out. He’ll get
out though.”
“I just hate that he’s in there because of me.”
“Enough!” His voice thunders across the table.
“This isn’t your fault and we’ll handle the fucker
that put him in there as soon as we can find his
ass.” His voice softens with the second part.
“Do you think I could stay at Roland’s house
for a few days?”
He looks up from his burger and his eyes meet
mine. I watch him as he chews. I can tell that
something is bothering him.
“I don’t trust most of the prospects just yet. I’ll
stay with you,” he mumbles around a bite of his
food.
“Thank you, Fin. I think I just need a break
from the clubhouse.”
“I get it sweetheart, but if you’re plannin’ on
stickin’ around for Reaper this time then you need
to get used to it. This is his world. We’re the other
part of his family. You get me?”
I nod my head with a smile on my face. I really
do like Fin. “I know, but I just need a few days to
recoup.”
“Then a few days you will get.”
He smiles. We start to eat in silence. Neither of
us really has anything else to say after that. There’s
just so much that I hate about our situation.
By the time we finish eating and head back to
the clubhouse it’s starting to get dark. Fin thought it
would be nice to just get out for a while today
which is why he took me to lunch. I can’t say that it
wasn’t appreciated, because it was.
“Mom, you’re back.”
Drake runs toward me with his arms out wide. I
pull him into me and hug him tightly. Fin smiles as
he walks past us and heads toward the bar.
“Did you really miss me that much today?” I
ask as I pull back to look down at him.
“Yes I did mom. I really miss dad too.”
His frown rips my heart to shreds. God, just
seeing it kills me.
“I know baby, but things will work out okay,” I
tell him. He nods his head, but his little eyes look so
tired. “Are you feeling okay? You don’t look so
good.” I press my hand to his forehead. He doesn’t
feel like he has a fever.
“I’m just tired.”
I nod and grab his hand to lead him through the
clubhouse and down the hall. Stepping into
Roland’s room my chest tightens. I’m here alone
and I couldn’t feel any worse about it.
“We’re going to be staying at your dad’s house
for a while. Pack a bag,” I tell Drake.
He walks around grabbing his things as I do the
same. Something about the way he looks is
bothering me. Drake has never been the type of
child to get tired that often. It makes me worry
about him. A knock on the door pulls me from my
thoughts.
“It’s open,” I call out. The door opens and Fin
walks in with a small bag thrown over his shoulder.
“You ready? I’m gonna grab us some pizza for
dinner. That sound good little man?” he asks
looking at Drake. Drake nods his head as he yawns.
“Drake go tell Taz goodbye. I need to talk to
Fin for a minute.”
I watch him walk out of the room and my heart
leaves with him.
“What’s wrong?” Fin asks immediately.
“He keeps saying he’s tired. He isn’t wanting to
play much. I’m worried about him,” I say as I sigh
and sit on the edge of the bed.
“He’s got a lot goin’ on darlin’. We can get the
doc to come check him out though if that’ll make
you feel better.”
I smile up at him and nod. “It really would.
Thank you Fin.”
“Not a problem sweetheart. I’ll give him a call
when we get settled over at Reaper’s place.
Thought we could get some movies on his pay-per-
view account?” He winks which makes me laugh.
“I really do appreciate everything you’re doing
for us.”
“Reaper’s my boy. He’s family. I’d do anything
for that man. He’s done a lot for me over the years.
He pulled my ass back from some pretty bad shit.
The least I can do is watch out for his wife and his
kid.”
14
Reaper
I
’m agitated, on edge, and I’m happy as hell to
be getting the fuck out of this place. I’ve done my
time and somehow the evidence that Tom had went
missing. I can thank Ink for that shit later. I’ve been
in this hell hole for six months. I’ve handled all the
shit that Ramirez wanted handled on the inside. I
hate to see what he’s going to throw at me now that
I’m getting out. I don’t like making deals with guys
like him. They’re fucking snakes that will strike out
without warning. I know what Ramirez does and
how he makes his money. Being in the midst of that
isn’t high on my priority list.
Getting home to my woman and son are on the
top of that list. I want to spend time with them. I
need to get to know my son, and then I need to find
that bastard that took them away from me to begin
with. I want his goddamn head on a platter and I
will make that happen. I have no doubt about that.
“Oh look at your sweet lips. Nice to see you,”
Viking teases me as I walk out of the prison and
straight to them. Mason and Ink are standing next
to the truck with smiles on both of their faces.
“You wish I had sweet lips motherfucker,” I
respond as he pulls me into a hug. He thumps his
hand on my back before he pulls away. Mason and
Ink takes their turns hugging me next.
“Glad to see you out brother. Missed you
around the clubhouse,” Mason tells me.
“Me too. That place is fucked,” I say pulling
my shirt up to reveal the ugly bruises and the
random healing stab wounds I now have.
“Jesus Christ. We’ll fix it man. We’ll go after
their fuckin’ families,” Viking says through gritted
teeth.
I shake my head and climb into the back of the
truck as the others climb in too. “I’m not in the
mood for that shit at this point. I just wanna see my
woman and my kid. I wanna take a fuckin’ nap and
just say fuck it. Ramirez’s assholes are gonna come
callin’ soon.” I lay my head back, close my eyes,
and just relax. The truck rumbles as we head home.
“What exactly is Ramirez after?” Mason asks.
His tone is hard and pissed.
“Guns. The motherfucker wants in. I figured I
could toss him to Ripley and let that shit just flow
down from there,” I say.
Ripley is another gun runner that we’re in with.
He can run anything, anywhere. Seems like a good
place to shove Ramirez’s ass.
“And on the inside? Did you get any info?” Ink
looks over the seat at me as he asks this.
“I got where Tom might be hidin’. I got
information on those Brotherhood bastards.
They’re an old MC. Recruitin’ anyone and
everyone they can get to agree in there. Had to get
in with a few of them to get Ramirez some
goddamn information. I don’t think anyone
suspected shit on my end, but right after that I
heard I was gettin’ out, so I pulled back. Got
stabbed three fuckin’ times for my effort.”
Ink shakes his head as anger crosses his face. I
know this is one hell of a shit storm for the club,
but it’s the best I could fucking do at the time.
“You said the club was in danger. What exactly
did you mean by that?” Mason asks looking directly
at me.
I turn my head to face him and say, “Not a lot.
It’s all about this Brotherhood shit. They’re pullin’
from all over. They killed a few of Ramirez’s guys
out in Texas. I was told that Tom was one of them. I
want his ass, I just can’t end up back in there. If I
do go back in I’m not ever comin’ back out brother.
I made some shit decisions while I was in there.”
Mason nods his head as if he understands what
I’m saying. I’m not so sure that he does. The people
I infiltrated aren’t exactly easy to escape.
“Molly is at your house with Drake and Fin.
She’s been stayin’ over there on the weekends. You
wanna head over there?” Viking asks.
I nod my head and lean back again. I must have
dozed off because the next thing I hear is my boy
yelling for his dad. Forcing my eyes open I reach
for the door handle. As soon as I step out of the
truck Drake is in my arms. I hold him close and
savor the little boy that I never even knew about.
“Hey, you’re gonna squeeze the air out of me,”
I tease him.
“I’m glad you’re back. Mom has been freaking
out about the doctor,” Drake says pulling out of my
arms and falling to his feet.
“Doctor? What about the doctor?” I ask him.
He shrugs and then I see her. She’s standing
there with those dark eyes that pull me into their
depths. I move toward her slowly never pulling my
gaze away from hers.
“Oh, they’re gonna kiss,” Drake giggles behind
me.
I smile at Drake, but I need her in my arms.
Now. As soon as I reach her I pull her into me and
just inhale her scent. God I’ve missed her.
“You smell delicious,” I whisper while placing a
light kiss on her neck. Molly moans and holds me
tighter. That’s just the way I want her.
“We need to talk,” she whispers.
“I need to be inside you,” I counter back.
“It’s about Drake.”
“Okay, just give me some time, yeah? I’m worn
the fuck out babe. I need a shower and some real
food at least.” I pull back and look into her eyes.
There’s worry and happiness all wrapped up into
one beautiful package.
“Okay. I’ll make you something.”
“It’s good to see you brother,” Fin says as he
moves toward us. I pull away from Molly long
enough to pull him into a hug.
“Good to see you too man. Thanks for takin’
care of them.”
“Always Reaper. That’s what family does.”
“I’m going to cook something. You guys
starving?” Molly interrupts. We all look to each
other.
“I sure as hell ain’t turnin’ down food,” Mason
says heading for the door. We all chuckle and head
inside.
Damn.
I am so glad to be home.
15
Molly
H
appiness comes with a price. It always has.
It always will. I don’t see that changing any time
soon either. I watch as all the guys filter out of the
house. Roland and Drake sit on the couch talking
and laughing. It makes my heart leap in my chest to
see the two of them together.
“It’s getting late. Taz will be by early to pick
you up Drake.”
The pout on his face makes Roland laugh.
“She’s right. I’m not goin’ anywhere son. Go
get ready for bed. Your mom and I will be in there
in just a minute,” Roland tells him. Drake leaps off
the couch and heads down the hallway when
Roland shoves up off the couch.
“The guys get you everything you needed for
his room?”
His eyes travel over my body as he speaks. I
can’t hide the blush that creeps over my cheeks.
“Yeah, Fin has been amazing. Drake calls him
Uncle Fin,” I laugh.
Roland nods his head before slowly walking
toward me. His hands slip around my waist and he
pulls me into him. “I’ve missed you. I’m sorry that
shit has been so fucked up since-” before he can
finish I kiss him.
As much as he’s missed me, I’ve missed him
even more. His tongue slides into my mouth and he
devours me until I’m a panting mess. When he pulls
back his eyes are dancing with hunger.
“Let’s go tell our son goodnight,” he says as he
grabs my hand in his and tugs me down the hallway.
We stop outside Drake’s door as Roland takes a
deep breath, I squeeze his hand. When he looks
over at me I tell him, “Don’t be nervous. We’ve
talked about you since you’ve been gone. He
misses you. He wants to be with you.” Roland nods
his head and pushes the door open. Drake is in his
bed listening to the iPod that Fin gave him.
“Bed doesn’t mean music time,” Roland teases
him. Drake smiles and pulls the earbuds out of his
ears.
“Uncle Fin put a lot of music on here.” He
holds it up to show his dad.
“Better be good music at least.”
“It is. He said it’s what you listen to,” Drake
says excitedly.
“Well then, I guess it’s good. It’s time to get
some sleep. I’ll see you in the mornin’.”
As I watch Roland lean in and hug him I
wonder about the past. Would things have always
been this sweet had we not been taken away from
him? I also think about what the doctor told me and
it makes this moment in time bittersweet. I’ve
managed to hold my emotions together while
everyone was here, but I feel myself slowly
crumbling. Knowing that there will never be a
lifetime of these moments is killing me inside. I’ve
fought for so long and so hard to have it all just
ripped away from me again.
A tear leaks down my cheek. Drake smiles my
way and blows me a kiss like he always does before
bed. Roland stands up, turns off the lamp, and
walks toward me. His hand cups my cheek as he
backs me out of the room. He pulls the door closed
behind him, his lips claiming mine as he pushes me
up against the wall in the hallway. His hands move
to my hips.
“I need you,” he whispers against my lips.
I know we need to talk. I need to tell him, but I
know that he needs this just as much as I do first. I
nod my head and that’s all he needs. He lifts me in
his arms, kisses me senseless, and walks toward the
bedroom. As soon as we’re inside he kicks the door
closed and sets me on my feet.
“Take all of it off.”
His gruff words send heat spiraling through me.
I quickly pull all my clothes off as he does the
same. When I look back up at his bare chest I gasp.
Angry bruises, scars, and fresh cuts litter his skin. I
look up and find his gaze still on mine.
“I’m fine. I had no choice in most of it.”
I walk toward him shaking my head. I let my
fingers travel his skin. The more I touch the harder
he breathes. When my fingers go lower, Roland
moves. His hands grip my wrists and he holds them
between us. I look up into his eyes and I’m lost in a
sea of green.
“I had to do somethin’ in there. Things I really
wished I didn’t. There’s gonna be blowback on the
club, but I didn’t have any choice. Everything got
all twisted up inside. I need to know that you can
handle this. This isn’t gonna be the first or last time
I come home lookin’ like this.”
He’s asking me to accept who he is now. He’s
asking me to overlook the pain that someone has
caused him, and as much I love him and want to
accept this, I’m not sure if I can. He can see the
look in my eyes. Roland walks us backwards until I
fall onto the bed, crawling on top of me he knees
my legs apart. He reaches between us and grabs his
dick then slams it into me. I arch my back.
Everything else is forgotten. I just need to feel him
inside me like this.
“I need to know Mols,” he whispers as he
slowly moves in and out.
“I don’t know,” I moan softly. His hips move
quickly then and thrust deeply.
“You have to know I can’t lose you again,” he
groans. Another thrust comes, hard and rough, and
he looks down at me.
“They hurt you,” I whisper.
“Not as much as losin’ you would hurt me. Tell
me I can keep you Mols. I need you. I need both of
you.”
“You have us.”
As soon as the words leave my mouth Roland
snaps. All of his prior restraint is gone. He lifts my
legs over his arms and slams into me. Everything in
the world could fall apart right now, but I can’t lose
him again.
As he increases his pace I feel myself tumbling.
I break apart into a million pieces at the same time
he does. His grunts and growls echo through the
room as he finds his release. He kisses me softly
before he pulls out of me and drops down next to
me.
“Drake has Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma,” I blurt
out. As soon as I do Roland jumps up.
“What the fuck? That’s what Crow had. How
the hell does a kid get that?”
“I don’t know. The doctor said there isn’t much
we can do.” The tears begin to fall from my eyes.
Roland’s face is a mixture of both anger and pain.
“We’ll find another doctor,” he says looking
down at me.
“Fin already did that. They all say the same
thing.”
“Fuck them. I’ll find us more. Someone has to
be able to do somethin’,” he roars. I reach for him,
but he pushes me away and runs his hand through
his hair. “No one thought they should tell me this?”
He looks at me like I’m the devil himself.
“I wanted to, but the doctor said it was best to
wait until you got home. That we shouldn’t add to
what you were already dealing with,” I say softly.
“You knew about this and didn’t tell me? How
the fuck could you do that? How many times are
you gonna fuck me over Molly? Huh?”
His roar could be heard for miles. I’m about to
respond, but I don’t know what to say. I don’t have
the chance to think about it either. Roland shoves
out of the bed, grabs his jeans, and pulls them on
before he storms out of the room.
I regret everything.
16
Reaper
I
’ve always wonder what would kill me. Would
it be a bullet? A rival? I never thought I would have
to think about what was going to kill my own child.
That’s a pill I never even knew I would have to
think about swallowing.
I’ve taken my anger out on Molly over the last
few days. I know I shouldn’t, but at the same time
she stole my child away and kept him from me and
now he’s dying.
I don’t even know how long he has. Everything
I’ve found on the internet says five years from the
original diagnosis. Five fucking years? What am I
supposed to do with five years? That isn’t enough
time. I want more than that.
I even called the bastard doc that told her and
he said it’s all unknown, that he could live fifty
years. I don’t like surprises and waking up one day
to my son being gone is not an option.
“You look like shit,” Mason says as he sits on
the stool next to mine.
“I feel like it. There’s just too much shit goin’
on Mason.”
He nods his head as if he understands, but he
doesn’t. None of them understand.
“She told me what she told you brother. I’m
sorry Reaper,” Whitley’s voice comes from behind
me. Her hand lands on my shoulder. I reach up and
place mine over hers and give it a little squeeze.
“Thanks darlin’. It’ll be alright though.” She
nods her head and pulls away from me and walks to
the kitchen.
“You’ve called other doctors?” Mason asks. I
nod and grab my beer.
“They all say the same shit. How the fuck do I
just get him back only to lose him for good?”
“I dunno brother. Let’s not think like that
though. He’s a strong kid. Hell, he’s your kid. If
anyone can beat this shit it’s him.”
I nod my head because he’s right. My kid’s a
fighter. He’s just like me.
“You ready to hit this run?” I ask him. Mason
chugs down the rest of his beer before he faces me.
“Fuck yeah. I’m ready to see what your handy
ass skills can do. That truck has been sittin’ since
you’ve been gone. We’re as ready as ever to see
that motherfucker in action,” he laughs.
I’ve always been handy with the welder. None
of the trucks that I’ve added compartments to have
even been checked. Once we saw how well they
were working for us Ink had the idea of making a
box truck. It makes sense. I welded fake walls into
the motherfucker. No one will suspect a thing and
since Viking wanted some new parts for the bikes
up north this was the perfect opportunity to see
how effective my work is.
“You’re pretty sure of it?” he asks.
I nod my head and reply, “You’re goddamn
right I am. Have you motherfuckers been arrested
with the trucks yet?” I ask fucking with him a little.
He chuckles and lights up a cigarette. “Hell
no,” he says.
“Then shut the fuck up. I know what I’m doin’
brother. We’ve got this. Hell, even if we do get
stopped, I’m runnin’,” I joke with him.
Mason shakes his head and Viking says, “You
aren’t runnin’. You too goddamn old to run.”
I glance up at him and smile, “Yeah, that’s what
it is. What’s up?”
“Not much. I’m itchin’ to get those parts down
here. I wanna amp up the bikes up before the big
ride,” he says as his voice drifts off in thought.
“I heard that. Don’t worry. Your parts will get
here.”
“No doubt. You ready to head out?”
“Damn right I am. I’ve missed this shit,” I
admit.
Viking nods while taking the cigarette from
Mason and brings it up to his lips. “It wasn’t the
same without you man. When you get back we
need to call church. I want to know all there is to
know about these Brotherhood motherfuckers. I
want to know who, what, when, where, and how
the fuck. Draven called me an hour ago and said
they had some shady fucks lurkin’ around over
there. Smokey keeps that compound locked the
fuck up, so I don’t see any problems, but they still
don’t know who they are.”
Fuck. That’s not what I wanted to hear before
we go out on a run.
“They workin’ on that?” I ask.
“Of course, brother. Smokey is a tough son of a
bitch. He isn’t lettin’ any shit go down over there.
Hell, even Mayhem stuck his dick in the middle of
it.”
“Mayhem becomin’ more and more like Ruger
every goddamn day, yeah?” I ask. The guys just
laugh.
“Fuck yeah, but when he starts stickin’ his dick
in other guys I’m gone. That goes for you too,”
Viking laughs while pointing at me.
“Fuck that. You don’t have shit to worry about
there. I may like to do some fucked up shit to
people, but Ruger passed me a long time ago.”
Laughing with the guys is a rarity. We don’t get to
do it often enough. It feels good as hell when we do
get to do it though.
“Well, if shit goes down at the So Cal
compound we may have to take a road trip,” Viking
sighs.
“Heard that. I wouldn’t mind seein’ the boys,” I
add.
“Me either,” Mason chimes in.
“Let’s just get this shit done. We’ll see what
they come up with. You said Ramirez’s boys were
hit in Texas, yeah?” I nod my head in reply. “Could
be the same fuckers sneakin’ into Cali. That’s on
their end though, so we can’t go gettin’ all excited
about it. Not when we have our own shit happenin’
here.”
“Right. Let’s get this shit goin’,” I tell Mason.
He nods and pushes up off of his stool and walks
toward the kitchen. I have no doubts that he’s going
to tell his woman goodbye.
“How you holdin’ up? I haven’t seen Molly
around in a few days?”
“Honestly, I don’t know any more Viking. I love
that woman, but fuck. She just wants to give up on
my kid. I can’t do that shit. I just got him back.
How the fuck do I lose somethin’ that I just got?” I
ask him seriously.
“You don’t. We’ll do whatever we have to and
pay whoever we need to so that we can get him
better. Fuck the doctors.”
“That’s just it brother. I’ve talked to every
goddamn doctor around. They all tell me the same
thing,” I tell him.
“Which is?”
“Enjoy the time he has.”
17
Molly
I
wander around the clubhouse while Roland is
gone. Taz has Drake as she’s homeschooling him
today. Wandering down the hall I hear Fin’s voice,
I’m not trying to be nosy, but I stop outside the
door and listen in.
“The only thing that bastard wants is her back.
If he gets her then everything else stops. The war
with the Brotherhood and everything else ends,”
Fin says.
“Fuck. And you think he’d really stop there?
We’re not that fuckin’ stupid Fin. Reaper ain’t
gonna let that shit slide anyway,” the voice I’ve
come to know as Ink chimes in.
“I wasn’t gonna let that shit slide either. You
think I’d hand Molly over to the asshole that stole
her to begin with? Fuck that.”
My heart nearly stops beating. I hold my breath
praying that they aren’t talking about me, but I
know that they are. They have to be.
“What the fuck are we doin’ here then? We
can’t go in guns blazin’. We don’t even know who
the fuck we’re dealin’ with,” Viking says.
“We’re dealin’ with the fucks that want Reaper
dead. That’s what the fuck we’re dealin’ with.
Ramirez fucked him over on the inside. He knew
Reaper had no fuckin’ choices in there and now
Tom has every goddamn advantage on his side,”
Fin roars.
I close my eyes tightly and wish I hadn’t
listened in, but I did. Roland doesn’t deserve all this
shit just because of me. I don’t deserve his love. I
don’t deserve him.
“Where is this fucker Tom anyway?” Viking
asks.
“Close. We can’t get an exact location, but we
know he isn’t far. We could use her to lure him
out,” Ink suggests. My chest clenches.
“Fuck that,” Fin growls. “You know the hell
that she lived through. No, we aren’t usin’ her.”
“You got a thing for her Fin? You sure the fuck
are actin’ like her old man right now,” Ink snaps. I
think about walking in there, but then I hear the
punches landing.
“Son of a bitch,” Fin roars.
I peek around the door frame and into the
room. Viking’s eyes find mine. A strange look
crosses his face. It’s a mixture of both anger and
intrigue. I swallow hard before turning on my heel
and running back down to Roland’s room.
Once I’m safely inside I let the anger and fear
wash over me. I cry like a damn baby. I cry because
I’m slowly losing my son. I cry because I’m killing
his father in the process. I really thought we could
be happy. I thought we were finally going to get our
second chance. The only thing I’m doing is tearing
him down. I’m in the middle of his life and I
shouldn’t be.
Once upon a time next to him was my place,
but I made the decision to not tell him about Tom. I
made that choice and now all of this is happening
because of me. I’m the reason for all of this. I can’t
let them ruin him. I can’t let what I did destroy his
family, they are his family, I’m the intruder here. I
should have never come here.
I should have taken Drake and run, but I knew
Roland could give him something I couldn’t. A life
without fear. Now that has been taken away from
him too. I’ve messed it all up. Swiping the tears off
of my cheeks, I take a deep breath. I just need to
find out where Tom is and go from there. If it’s me
he wants to end all of this for Roland, then I will go
willingly. I will endure everything if it means that
Roland and Drake are safe.
I shove off the bed and head to the closet.
Packing myself a small bag I nestle it in the corner
and out of sight. Just like the bag Drake used to
always have ready.
When I find out where the fuck Tom is, I’m
going. I’ll runaway just like before and make this
right.
I let the idea settle in my mind. There is no
other choice. I don’t want to be away from Drake
at all. Especially when health is deteriorating. I
don’t know how long I have left with him, and
that’s what hurts me the most.
No, this is the right thing to do. I have to fix this
some way. I have to believe that Drake is going to
be fine and that Roland can handle taking care of
him. A knock on the door stops my train of thought.
I walk over and pull it open to find Viking standing
there.
“Can we talk for a minute?” he asks.
I nod once and step back to allow him entrance
into the room. Walking toward the bed I drop back
onto it.
“I know shit’s been hard on you. It’s not just
you that we’re worried about though. Reaper is our
family. He’s been a huge part of our lives, and to let
him go down… it’s just not an option.” His tone is
even, but I can see the hint of evil in his eyes. I
know he doesn’t like me being around here.
“I get it Viking. As soon as I can, I will leave.”
“No, I don’t think you do get it. I don’t want
him hurtin’ over you. I don’t want to watch him
become the way he was when he first stepped foot
into this clubhouse. He was a goddamn mess before
and now he’s dealin’ with the shit that happened in
the pen and Drake. I worry about him Molly.” His
admission calms me a little. I can’t say that I don’t
understand, because I do.
“I worry about him too, which is why I need to
get out of here. I can’t let him go down for what
I’ve done. I messed up. It was me, not him or
Drake. I just need to know that Drake is welcome
here,” I tell him as my eyes fill with tears.
“What the hell are you sayin’?”
“I’m saying that I need to go. I need to find
Tom and handle this myself. Roland doesn’t
deserve my shit on top of what he already has going
on.”
“You think he’s just gonna let you walk the
fuck out of here? Have you lost your goddamn
mind? All he cares about is you and his son. You
can’t leave him,” Viking snaps.
“I have no other choice. Don’t you see that? If
I stay I’m risking your club. It’s not just Roland and
Drake. It’s all of you,” my voice almost hurting my
ears. Viking watches me for a few minutes, not
saying a word.
“You want help? That what this is? You want
me to go behind my brother’s back and help you
run?”
The look in his eyes tells me that this is a bad
idea. I should have asked Fin. If anyone would help
me, it would be him. The fact that Viking is the
president is the only reason I’m asking him. He can
withhold information, keeping it to himself, he
doesn’t have to tell anyone if he doesn’t want to.
“I don’t want to drag anyone else down Viking.
I’ve done enough of that for years. Roland lived
without me once. He can do it again.”
“And your son? He can’t live without you.”
I close my eyes and blow out a slow breath.
“I don’t want to leave today. I want to spend a
little more time with Drake. I need that time with
him.”
“I understand that. Fuck Molly, this is gonna
kill Reaper. You do know that, right?” Viking drags
his hand through his long blonde hair.
“He’s a grown man. He can handle it.”
“And Fin?”
He would ask about Fin.
“Fin’s a good guy. I hope one day he finds what
he’s looking for. It isn’t me.”
“Goddamn it,” he thunders and tugs at his hair.
He paces the room unsure of what to say and I
can’t blame him. I’ve just laid my life out for him,
and I’m asking him to help me go against his own
family.
“We give it some time. He needs you right now,
and so does the kid. Let shit settle for a bit and if
you still wanna handle it, I’ll help you.”
I nod my head with a small smile. Viking nods
before storming out of the room.
18
Reaper
“G
oddamn, I almost want to get pulled
over just to see what the fuck they can find,”
Mason chuckles in the seat next to me. I just shake
my head at the crazy son of a bitch. I’d prefer not
to get pulled over if it’s all the same to him.
“Those walls look real, don’t they?” I ask him.
Mason pulls the cigarette from his lips and glances
over at me.
“Fuckin’ hell yeah, they do. That’s why I want
to get pulled over. I want to see the look on those
pig’s faces when they can’t find a damn thing,” he
laughs before looking back at the road.
One thing I can always count on with these
guys is a good laugh. My brothers never fail me.
“So, what do you think about this Brotherhood
shit?” I ask as I grab a pack of cigarettes and light
one up.
“I honestly don’t know. I’ve never heard
anything about it until you brought it to the table.
Seems like a lot of bullshit if you ask me though.
Who the fuck wants to be under the radar? MCs
are always up front you know? That’s the part that
pisses me off. We don’t hide who we are or what
we do,” he says as he pulls off on the next exit. He
keeps driving and follows the directions we were
given.
“I suppose you’re right, but that doesn’t say
shit for why they killed Ramirez’s guys. They didn’t
keep that on the down low if they did that. Think
they’re plottin’ somethin’?” Mason considers it a
minute before raising his shoulder.
“It’s hard to say. What the fuck could they even
want? We aren’t the only ones runnin’ that shit.
Every goddamn one percenter around is runnin’
somethin’. It just seems odd to me.”
I lean back in my chair and smoke my cigarette
while he keeps driving. I let his words roll around in
my head. We shouldn’t even be on their radar as far
as I’m concerned. Yeah they know I was in with
Ramirez when I was locked up, but that’s the
extent of it. If Tom is one of them, which doesn’t
feel right to me, why the fuck would it matter?
Hasn’t he been with them long enough for them to
have his back?
“What are you thinkin’?” Mason asks.
“Not much man. I just can’t wrap my head
around any of this shit. None of it makes sense.
What the hell does Tom have to do with any of it?”
“I hear you. We’ll get it figured out. Let’s just
deliver this shit and move on.”
We’ve been driving for hours. Making our way
into Georgia I let out a breath of relief and sigh. We
haven’t been stopped. I suppose that’s a good thing
regardless of what Mason thought.
As we pull off on the exit I see a road block.
Spoke to fucking soon I guess.
“Well fuck. I was only jokin’ about wanting to
get pulled over and shit,” Mason grumbles which
makes me laugh.
I watch the fucking officer like a hawk. I’m
holding my breath like a kid going under water and
when the fucker waves us through, I nearly pass
out. Mason laughs hysterically next to me.
“You should have seen your face. That was
fuckin’ epic brother.”
Glad I could amuse his ass. We drive a little
further until we finally get to our destination
without any further incidents. I hop out of the truck
and stretch my aching body as I’m ready to get this
over with and head back home. I need to apologize
to Molly. I know I hurt her. I know I was fucked up
in the head and I fucked up by doing it, but I can’t
face the fact that I’m losing my son. It hurts too
damn much.
“Termite, my man.”
I look at the man Mason hollers to. Termite?
What the fuck kind of name is that?
“Mason, you got my shit?” he asks.
Mason chuckles as he pulls the back door of the
truck up. Termite looks inside as his face turns red.
“What the fuck is this shit?” he asks.
“What? You don’t see your shit?” Mason
taunts. I laugh.
“Goddamn it Mason! Is this a fuckin’ joke?”
Seeing that he’s getting truly pissed off I jump
into the back of the truck and begin to remove the
panels. One by one I pull the false panels off and
reveal the drugs hidden behind them.
“Well I’ll be goddamned. Who the hell did
this?” Termite asks climbing into the back with me.
Mason hops in behind him.
“That’s all Reaper,” Mason says nodding at me.
Termite’s face lights up.
“No shit? I’m gonna have to hire you up here
sometime to do some work for me.”
We begin pulling the drugs out and start tossing
them to the floor.
“This is some good shit, Reaper. Really good
shit,” Termite tells me. I nod my head and continue.
“Let me get the boys to finish unloadin’ and
then we’ll get your parts loaded up,” Termite says
as he eyes the false walls a little more.
I like seeing the smile on his face. When all of
the drugs are lying on the floor of the truck I jump
down and light up a smoke. Pulling my cell free I
dial Molly.
“Hello?”
I close my eyes as her voice soothes me. “Hey
baby.”
“Hey. Are you okay?” she asks.
“Yeah. We just got here. As soon as we unload
we’ll head back. I just wanted to say I’m sorry for
the way I’ve been actin’.”
The line is silent for a minute. My heart wants
to leap out of my chest. I don’t know if she’s going
to forgive me or not.
“I get it Roland. It’s a lot to handle. I get it.”
I sigh in relief when she says that. I can’t have
her mad at me. I can’t have her upset. I need her on
my side. I love her too much to let this come
between us. I’m watching as Termite’s guys unload
the truck quickly before filling it with bike parts.
“I’ll be home soon. I just needed to tell you that
I’m sorry,” I tell her.
“I love you Roland.”
“I love you too babe.”
I hang up the phone and glance over at Mason.
“Is she okay?”
I nod my head and blow out a breath. I was
nervous as fuck that she’d hate me.
“You, Reaper. Come on over here and tell me
what it’d cost to get you up here to make a few of
these for me?” Termite calls out.
I turn on my heel and walk toward him. I stop
in front of him as a few of his guys eye me with
suspicion.
“A couple thousand should do it if you supply
the materials. It’s all sweat and work after that,” I
tell him inhaling the nicotine from my cigarette.
“Sounds good. I can do that. I’ll give you a call
and we can get a time set up, yeah?”
Termite extends his hand to me and I take it. I
shake his hand on a new job. Maybe when the time
comes, I can bring Drake and Molly with me. Let
them see the sights in Georgia, if Drake is even still
around.
That thought alone send chills up my spine.
19
Molly
I
watch Drake and Roland toss the football back
and forth to each other in the backyard. It’s the
little things like this that I hate that Roland missed.
I hate myself for making him miss out on these
things. The smile on his face couldn’t get much
bigger. He’s so damn proud of his son.
“They are adorable together,” Taz says as she
sits down in the chair next to me.
“They are.”
“Thanks for offering to hold the cookout here. I
don’t like having it at the clubhouse. Too close to
the main road. People end up getting pissy about
it,” Taz says looking over at me.
“Roland didn’t mind. I thought it would be nice
anyway. Drake and I have been holed up in this
house for too long. It’s nice to have people over,” I
say back to her. Her smile is huge.
“I’m happy to see him happy. It’s been a long
time since he’s smiled like that.”
I love Taz. She may be a little older than me,
but she has a heart of gold. She takes care of
everyone the way she would her own kids, and
these are grown men. It does my heart good to
know that Roland will have her once I’m gone.
“You love them all, don’t you?” I ask.
She looks over at me and nods, “Like they’re
my own. We’re all one big family. There’s a family
here that not everyone has. We’re lucky to have it.
I’m just happy to say that you’re a part of it now.”
She reaches over and grabs my hand.
My chest tightens. How is she going to feel
when I leave? How is Roland going to react? God it
hurts so much to even think about it.
“Hey babe, come here,” Roland calls out to me.
I smile as I shove out of the chair and walk
toward him. I take in his eyes, his smile. Everything
about him is absolute perfection. I love that man
more than I ever thought it was possible I could,
and soon I’m going to have to rip his heart in half
once more. I have to remember that it’s all for the
best. I have to believe that I’m doing the right
thing, or I might rethink it all.
“Hey you. You two look good out here,” I say
fluffing up Drake’s hair.
“Dad said I’m good enough to try out for the
team. He thinks I have a good arm,” Drake squeals
with happiness.
“Oh yeah? You think you’d like to do that?” I
ask.
“Yeah, that would be awesome. I can kick too.
Watch!”
Drake turns and runs with the ball in his hands.
Roland moves to stand behind me and wraps his
arms around my waist holding me tight against him.
“He’s perfect Mols. Just fuckin’ perfect,” he
whispers in my ear.
“No, he’s everything.”
As I watch my son play football and laugh my
inside start to churn. I can’t imagine my life without
him. A sob bubbles up in my throat before it comes
out.
“It’s okay darlin’. He’s strong. He’s gonna pull
through this. We just have to have faith in that,”
Roland says softly.
“I just don’t know what I’m going to do with
him. What am I going to do Roland? What are we
going to do?”
“I’m gonna love you Mols. We’re gonna miss
him every day together when that time comes, but
for right now he’s here. He’s with us and that’s all
we can focus on for now. We can’t live in the
future.”
God, I know he’s right. It’s just so hard not to
think about it.
“Come on mom,” Drake yells with the biggest
smile I’ve ever seen on his face.
I wipe my eyes and pull out of Roland’s arms to
run toward him. He throws me the ball and as soon
as I catch it I can hear Roland yell, “Tackle.”
Before I can respond or even think about it Roland
lifts me by the waist and pulls me to the ground
with Drake right behind him.
“Hold her down. Make her laugh Drake. Don’t
let her up until she’s laughin’,” Roland says around
his own laugh.
Drake tickles my sides as we all roll around on
the ground. In this moment it really hits me. We’re
laughing and playing like a family. We’re a family.
This is the family we should have always been.
“Okay, I give up. You win,” I squeal. Drake
laughs and climbs to his feet as Roland lays next to
me breathlessly.
“Dad we won! Can we have ice cream after we
eat?” he asks excitedly.
“You know it. Go ask Viking if the food is about
ready,” Roland tells him.
Drake nods and takes off running through the
yard. Roland rolls over onto his side and props
himself up on his elbow to look down at me. He
reaches over and pulls a piece of grass from my
hair.
“Thank you,” he says with sincerity in his eyes.
“For what?”
“Stayin’ after you showed up. For escapin’ from
that bastard. For livin’. For bein’ here now.” He
shrugs his shoulders. “Just… thank you for my
son.”
As tears well up in my eyes he reaches over and
pulls me against him. A few tears fall before he
pulls back, leans down, and kisses me. His lips are
warm and soft. As quickly as the kiss started it’s
over, he pulls back and rests his forehead against
mine.
“I’m just glad you’re back. I was lost for so
long Mols. I didn’t know what the fuck to do or
where to turn. I tried to find you a few times, but
there was nothin’. It fuckin’ kills me that you were
so close and there was nothin’ I could have done.”
I reach up and brush his hair out of his eyes and
smile while saying, “Thank you for being you.
Thank you for accepting me back into your life.
Thank you for understanding the reason I had to go.
I know it can’t be easy to forgive me for keeping
him from you.”
“Shh. You’re here now. He’s here now. I was
pissed at you at first, but God I can’t picture not
havin’ the two of you.”
With another kiss to my lips Roland climbs to
his feet and drags me up with him. He tosses his
arm over my shoulder and leads me back toward
the house. All of the guys are gathered around the
grill and the girls are on the back porch talking and
laughing. Roland stops walking. I take the chance
to glance up at him. The look of pure happiness is
all I can see.
They were right, all of them. This is what a
family looks like. They come together in the best of
times and fight together through the worst. And the
most amazing things about it all is that they do it all
together.
“They love you,” I say still looking up at him.
He glares down at me and nods.
“They’ve been everything to me for a long
time. They are closer to me than brothers.”
“They’re good people.”
I nod my head because the more I watch them
all together, the more I can see it.
“You remember we do illegal shit, yeah?” he
asks with a chuckle.
“I know, but they’re good to you and that’s
what matters the most.”
With a smile he leans down and kisses me once
more.
20
Reaper
“C
ome on Reaper. You don’t have to do
this,” the prick screams as I hold his cracked out
girlfriend by the hair in front of him.
“Why the fuck not? You won’t tell me what I
want to hear. I think it’s only fair,” I say laughing in
his face.
I drag the girl around so that her back slams
into my chest which knocks the air from her lungs.
She huffs but doesn’t try to fight me.
“She doesn’t know shit Reaper,” he yells out.
I’m really getting tired of hearing him repeat the
same shit. I should shoot her in the head and just
get it all over with. Mason chuckles next to me with
a cigarette hanging from his lips. Ink just shakes his
head as he’s clearly annoyed with this bullshit too.
“Well, the problem with all of this is that you do
know. I know you know. I don’t know why we have
to play these little games. Just tell me where the
fuck Tom is. That’s all I need to know. You and
your slut here can walk free if you’ll just tell me,” I
inform him.
His eyes move to meet hers before snapping
back to mine. A pained look crosses his face and I
know what the answer is going to be. I’m not sad
that I’m going to have to kill these two assholes. It
aggravates me that I have to waste more time trying
to find that bastard Tom. He’s out there somewhere
and I know he’s close by. I can feel it in my bones.
“Hey Ink. You like red heads, yeah?”
I glance over at him and he grins and moves
toward me. He pulls the girl from my grasp and
moans as he pulls her body against his. One of his
hands snakes around her waist while the other goes
around her neck. He slowly slips his hand into the
front of her tiny shorts and straight between her
thighs. She tries to fight him, but with the grip he
has on her neck she isn’t going anywhere. Larry,
the fucking idiot, is on his knees in front of me as
he screams and hollers.
“Shut the fuck up!” I roar.
Ink doesn’t stop what he’s doing, not that I
expected him to. Larry’s eyes move from me to his
girl and back again. The fear you can see in his
eyes is what’s pushing me forward. Something
about seeing a grown man brought to his knees
excites me.
“Last chance before Ink here squeezes the life
right out of her,” I offer him one last chance. I offer
a way for this to end. Now we just sit back and
watch to see if he takes it.
“The Brotherhood isn’t as big as they want
people to think it is. Everyone thinks it’s some old
ass MC that’s reuniting,” he finally says.
“Isn’t it?” I ask as I cock my head to the side to
study him.
Put a man in the situation he’s in and a majority
of the time they’re going to tell you the truth.
Whether it’s out of fear for their loved one or fear
for their own end. Either way, they end it.
“No. A few might be from there, but a majority
are some ape shit crazy ex-cons. Ramirez knows all
about it. That son of a bitch orchestrated it all,” he
chuckles harshly.
“No fuckin’ way,” I mumble.
Larry looks up at me and his eyes are wild like
he thinks I don’t believe him. In this moment I
don’t know that I do believe him. Ramirez told me
they killed his guys. He told me to my face that he
wasn’t a part of this shit.
“Fuckin’ liar. You son of a bitch,” I scream
even louder.
He’s been playing me, this whole fucking time,
he’s been playing me against the other side. He
used me to get what he wanted. He fucking knew
that I would never let him in on our guns. That
bastard!
“I didn’t lie. I swear to Go--”
I pull the trigger. His body drops to the floor.
“I never said you were a liar,” I tell his dead
body.
I glance at Ink and he slides his hand from the
slut’s shorts and shoves her forward toward her
dead boyfriend as she cries. I raise my arm and pull
the trigger for the second time tonight.
She falls to the floor with him with her hand
resting across his chest. I tilt my head and study the
two of them for a second. How perfect was that
shot? It allowed them to fall to their deaths while
still being connected to each other.
“Well, that fucked up the plan slightly,” Mason
chuckles and kicks the dead girl’s foot.
“A little? No, that fucked me a lot! I already
knew that if I ever got sent back to the pen I was a
dead man, but now I’m a dead man walkin’ the
streets too. Ramirez fucked me over,” I say through
gritted teeth. My jaw is locked so tightly that pain
radiates through it.
Ink walks over and rests his hand on my
shoulder and says, “Hey, we’ll get that bastard too.
He ain’t the only one with connections in the pen
brother.”
I nod my head and reach into my pocket for the
pack of cigarettes I carry around with me. I pull
one out and light it up.
“This is complete shit. I just want my family
safe man. I want the motherfucker that took my
family away from me dead. Why the fuck is it
always so fuckin’ difficult?” I ask this mainly to
myself.
“Because this is our life brother. This is what
we signed up for. This is who we are. Shit doesn’t
change just because we have kids or an old lady.
This is what we are. We are the fuckin’ Soulless
Bastards,” Mason bellows next to me.
I take one last look at the death that I just
caused before I look at him. Fire is dancing in my
veins.
“You’re goddamn right we are. We fight until
the end. Until death and that’s exactly what the
fuck I’m gonna do,” I tell him.
A new plan begins to take shape in my mind. A
brand new idea. A way to get both of those fucking
bastards.
Obviously finding Tom is the first thing on my
list, but when I find him and take his ass out, I can
arrange it so that I’m caught. Prison might not be a
place a normal person wants to go, but a man with
a death wish? Hell fucking yeah. I don’t want to
leave my family. I don’t want them hurting over
me, but if it means saving them from Ramirez, then
that’s what I’m going to fucking do.
“What the fuck is that look?” Ink asks as a
smirk curls the corners of my lips.
“What the fuck Reaper?” Mason calls out to
me.
I don’t stop until I’m outside in the fresh air
again. I inhale deeply and clear my head of
everything else.
“Just what the fuck I said. I have a new plan.
I’m gonna get Tom then I’m goin’ after Ramirez,” I
say as if we’re having any other normal
conversation.
“You do realize that Ramirez is never leavin’
the pen, yeah?” Mason asks. I nod my head with a
grin still on my face.
“No. Fuck that! You aren’t goin’ back in. Your
woman and kid need you,” Mason says as his face
turns to stone.
He’s pissed, but there is no stopping me. I’m
going to do this. I’m going to make sure that he
never fucks over another person that I love.
“I got time Mason. Don’t fight me on this shit.
It’s the club’s ass that’s on the line with him. If he
gets the guns runnin’ who’s to say that he doesn’t
use that shit against us? He used Tom against me.
He used my kid, my woman, my club, my fuckin’
family. Fuck him!” I roar as I flick my cigarette
through the air. I watch it fall to the ground and
slowly burn out.
21
Molly
I
watch as my son lies in bed sound asleep. His
ailing body is slowly losing all of his energy. Fin
called the doctor in to look at him while Reaper
was on his run. He said it’s all a part of the disease.
It will wear him down until there is nothing left.
His eyelids flutter as he sleeps which makes my
heart break in my chest. He’s such a strong, brave
kid. I hate that there is nothing I can do to fix this. I
want to make him better. As a mother that is
something that we should be able to do for our kids.
We are their safety. We are the ones that kiss away
the pain and hug them tightly. I feel helpless
knowing that I can’t do any of that for him.
“You got a minute? I found out somethin’ that I
think you should know,” Fin whispers behind me.
I glance over my shoulder and nod before I
follow him out into the hallway. Viking is leaning
against the wall with his arms crossed over his
chest. My eyes go from him to Fin and back.
“What’s going on?”
“I did a little diggin’ into the kind of cancer that
Drake has. Did you know your dad?” Viking asks
me.
I shake my head and look to Fin, but he doesn’t
say a word.
“Not really. Why?”
“Did you know that he used to live in
California?” Viking asks me while looking me
directly in the eye. What the hell is going on? What
does my dad have to do with any of this?
“No, I don’t know much about him. What is all
this about Viking?”
“You had a brother Molly,” Fin says quickly.
My heart nearly stops in my chest. There’s no
way.
“No, I would have known that,” I protest as I
wrap my hands around myself.
“You didn’t. It was a fling he had. The cancer
Drake has, fuck,” Viking says as he runs a hand
through his hair before looking back up at me. “It
can be hereditary. I had the doc run some tests.
Crow was your brother, well your half-brother at
least.”
I don’t understand any of this. “So, he’s in
California?” I ask confused more now than ever. I
have a brother?
“No darlin’. Crow killed himself a little while
back. He knew he was dyin’,” Fin says. He rests his
hand on my shoulder.
“Why did he kill himself? Did he seek
treatment? Was it too late?” There are a million
questions I want to ask, but I can’t focus. I had a
brother.
“He didn’t want the treatment. Crow was a
different kind of guy. He lost his son when he was a
kid. He couldn’t live with it anymore. They all
thought he was gettin’ better when he met his old
lady, but it didn’t last. Crow never got over his
boy’s death,” Viking explains as Fin keeps a firm
hand on my shoulder.
A gasp escapes me followed by a sob. I had a
brother and a nephew that I never got to meet?
How does something like that happen? How did I
never know? This is so messed up. This whole
situation is just a mess. As the tears start to fall in
earnest, I feel myself falling. Fin pulls me into his
arms as I cry. I cry for a brother I never knew. I cry
for a nephew that never got the chance to meet his
aunt. I cry because my life is crumbling right in
front of me, and there isn’t a thing I can do to stop
it.
“It’s okay Molly. It’ll all be okay,” Fin says
softly trying to reassure me. Viking kneels in front
of me with his hand coming to rest on my cheek.
“I’m gonna get you some of his pictures and
things, yeah?”
Nodding slowly he wipes my cheek before he
moves away from us. I watch as he walks away
before I hear Roland.
“What the hell is happenin’ here?”
His voice is hard and even. I look up at him and
when he sees my tear stained face his face falls. He
drops to his knees and grabs me from Fin’s arms to
pull me into his.
“What happened babe?”
I can’t speak. I don’t know what to say.
“We… uh.. we found some shit out. Asked doc
to pull a few strings. It turns out the cancer Drake
has is hereditary. Seems to run in the family. Crow
was Molly’s half-brother.”
The more he says it the harder it becomes to
breathe.
“Fuck. Are you kiddin’ me?” Roland asks still
holding me tightly.
“Wish I was brother.”
I can hear movement behind me, but I don’t
look up to see Fin walking away. Roland just sits
with me in his arms and rocks me slowly.
“I met him a few times. He was a good guy,” he
whispers into my hair. I pull back and look up to
him.
“Did you ever meet his son?” Roland shakes his
head sadly.
“Never got the pleasure. I think he was maybe
five or six when he was killed. It ruined Crow. His
old lady Lyric brought back pieces of him, but it
wasn’t enough,” he says choking on his words.
“Is that going to be us when Drake dies? Are
we going to be able to handle it Roland?” I sob
even harder and bury my face into his shirt. My
body trembles as the tears just keep falling.
“We have to be stronger. We don’t have a
choice Mols. There’s a lot more life to live and
Drake wouldn’t want you to waste it. That boy
loves life too much,” he reminds me.
“I don’t know what to do without him. I had a
brother that I never got to meet. I had a nephew I
never got to see. This is so fucked up Roland. Tom
ruined it all. He ruined my whole fucking life!” I
scream loudly.
“He’ll pay for it too baby. I promise.”
As I sit in his arms and think about my past, I
know that I’ve ruined it all. It’s all because of me.
If I would have just talked to Roland and told him
about what Tom was doing. If I would have just run
harder and further. Why didn’t I fight him? Why
didn’t I try harder? This is all my fault.
“It’s my fault,” I cry even harder still.
“No, it’s not. Don’t blame yourself Mols. There
isn’t anything we could have done. If Crow had of
known about you it wouldn’t have made a
difference to him. He was a lost soul.”
“I could have tried Roland. If I’d known I could
have tried!”
He rocks me in his arms and I just fall apart.
How can any of this be happening? How do you not
know about your own family? One man. That son
of a bitch stole it all away from me. The first
chance I get to go after him and I’m gone. I will
make good on my promise to myself. I will kill him.
I don’t know how, but I will figure it out.
22
Reaper
“Y
our shirt is bloody,” Molly says after
I carried her into my room at the clubhouse. Drake
is sleeping peacefully in one of the spare rooms.
“It’s not mine.”
“I didn’t figure it was,” she says as she slowly
pushes my cut down my arms.
I watch her face which is red and swollen from
crying, yet so goddamn beautiful at the same time.
I’ve missed her. The woman that stole my heart so
long ago. The one person that saw inside me and
saw my soul. The one that held me close at night
and whispered how much she was in love with me.
The world has a way of changing us. It changed
me, and when she looks up into my eyes, I can see
just how much it’s changed her as well. In some
ways it’s weakened us. It shows us just enough of
the light to give us hope. It keeps us in that middle
ground of grey area where we never know what’s
going to happen next. That’s my entire life summed
up, the grey area.
When I lost her the first time I swore I would
never find my way back out of the black, but
slowly the guys and my club brought me back.
Finding her that day outside of the clubhouse, fuck,
I thought the light was finally coming back to me. I
thought I was redeemed and given a second chance
to love, but it’s all slowly slipping back out of my
grasp.
“Kiss me,” she says softly as her fingers run
under the hem of my shirt.
Her nails scrape along the muscles on my chest
and down to my abs. I lean in and capture her lips
with mine. A slow heated kiss turns into so much
more. I grab her around the neck and hold her as
close as I can get her.
Molly breaks away first and takes a step back
as she pulls her shirt over her head. I’m totally
enraptured by her. She has me under her spell just
like she did all of those years ago. She tosses her
shirt to the side and slides out of her shorts. My
eyes run a line up and down her body. I unbuckle
my jeans as she slowly works her way out of her
panties. Trying to control my cock is another story.
That fucker is begging to be released. When we’re
both completely naked and exposed to each other I
see a tear slip down her cheek.
“I always wanted a family. A real family that
loved each other so much and cared about what
happened to the others,” she speaks softly. I nod
my head and step into her embrace.
“Crow was a good man. He would have loved
you and Drake, Mols.”
I run my fingers up and down her arms. She
trembles.
“Do you think we could talk to her one day?
Lyric.”
I wasn’t expecting her to ask that.
“I think she’d love to meet you and Drake. It
would be good for her.”
She nods her head and leans into my chest. Her
lips on my skin ignite a need that I can’t deny. Her
tongue sweeps out which causes me to suck in a
breath.
“I need you to fuck me Roland, hard. I don’t
want easy.”
The begging in her voice has my cock jumping
between us. The way she can make me feel with
her words alone is indescribable.
“I’ll give you anything you want baby. You
know that,” I tell her as I run my fingers through
her hair.
Molly steps out of my embrace and climbs onto
the bed. She rolls to her stomach as I watch her
body move. From her long golden hair to the curves
of her soft round ass. Everything about her calls to
me. It’s like we were never apart. Everything, and I
do mean everything that I’ve ever loved about her
is still there.
Her heart is gold; a heart that only wants what’s
best for everyone around her. The woman puts
herself on hold to make sure her son is cared for.
Fuck, I love her more now than I ever did.
Climbing onto the bed behind her I kneel and
grab her waist. I lift her up to her knees and lean
down to press soft kisses to her ass cheeks. I lower
my head as I go. When I find the wetness that I
knew would be there I groan out loud. I need to
taste her. I run my tongue along her seam as I
slowly push it inside of her. I need to feel her
writhing around me. I need to know that she’s real.
“Roland. Fuck me, please,” she begs. God, I
love it.
“You’re gettin’ a little demandin’ on me, aren’t
you?” I chuckle as I sit back up.
Grabbing my cock in my hand I tease her with
it. Molly arches her back and presses back against
me trying to take what she wants. I love seeing her
like this, begging me to fuck her. Me. Only me.
She’s everything to me And as I thrust into her she
moans.
“That’s not what I want to hear when I’m
fuckin’ you darlin’. You wanted it hard? I wanna
hear you scream,” I tell her as I grab her hips and
plunge into her.
I get exactly what I want as she screams for me.
My fingers dig into her hips as I fuck her into the
mattress. My world slowly fades and all that exists
is Molly and me. Just like when we were first
together. The sound of our skin slapping together as
I give her what she wants sends chills down my
spine. My hips pick up the pace and I force her to
take me in ways I don’t think she ever has before.
“Oh god. Yes!” she screams for me.
I chuckle and slap her ass before pounding into
her again. With each slap my world slowly begins
to take shape around me. I know deep in my heart
that what I have planned is for the best. They
deserve to be safe; they deserve to be happy, and
most of all they deserve a life that doesn’t have
them looking over their shoulders.
“Roll over,” I growl as I pull out of Molly.
She quickly rolls onto her back. She stares up at
me with those chocolate colored eyes. Fuck me. I
want this to last forever.
I lift both of her legs over my shoulders and slip
back inside of her. I close my eyes and revel in the
feeling of her being tightly wrapped around me.
With as much force as I can muster, I thrust into
her roughly. Her beautiful tits bounce with each
slap of our bodies. My cock hardens painfully as I
fuck her without regard. She asked for this. She
wanted this, and God fucking help me, I want to
give it to her. Her nails dig into my forearms as her
screams get louder.
“Harder. I need it harder,” she cries.
I shift myself into a new position and ram into
her. It’s nearly painful, but the satisfaction is well
worth it. Molly tenses as her body is preparing to
unleash one hell of an orgasm.
“Roland! Fuck!” she shouts as her pussy
tightens around me.
“Goddamn it Mols. Do it!” I roar. A few more
thrusts and she lets go. Her body convulses and her
legs are digging into my shoulders. Her nails draw
blood as a strangled scream escapes her. My balls
tighten as I release and float in a world that only
the two of us inhabit. With each small contraction
of her muscles my cock twitches inside of her. She
milks me for everything I have and then some. I
lower my head and kiss her neck before I slip her
legs back down my arms. She wraps them around
my waist to keep me where I am.
“God, that felt so good,” she mumbles in a
sleepy voice.
I smile and kiss her once more before I reply,
“That was amazin’. You can fuck me like that
anytime baby.”
Molly opens her eyes and a small smile crosses
her face as she says, “I love you.”
“You only love me because I can fuck you like
that,” I tease her.
“I mean it Roland. I never stopped loving you.”
I can see the worry in her eyes. I can see doubt
that I don’t believe her, or that I don’t know that
she loves me, but I do.
“I love you too. I always have, and I always
will. You were always meant to be mine Molly.
There was a time when I doubted it and I hated
you, but I never stopped lovin’ you. I know it
doesn’t make sense, but fuck. I’d give my last
breath to see you smile.”
Molly lifts up and takes my lips with hers in a
soft, sweet kiss that does the rest of the talking for
us.
23
Molly
M
y body aches as I walk to the kitchen to
start getting breakfast ready. We’ve been back to
Roland’s house for a few days now. I can’t say
we’ve done much sleeping, it’s been like one big
sexfest. Not that I’m complaining. I love being with
him, but he has worn me out. This new Roland is a
lot different than the old one, he still has the same
heart though and for that I love him even more.
I grab the eggs and bacon out of the fridge and
begin making breakfast. The sound of sizzling
bacon makes me smile. It’s been so long since I’ve
done this, just made an everyday normal breakfast
for my family.
My family. I love the sound of that.
As I cook the eggs I can feel his presence
behind me. Roland slides his arms around my waist
as his lips caress my neck.
“Mornin’,” he says in that sexy, groggy voice
that always makes me smile.
“Morning. You hungry?” I ask and look over
my shoulder to see Roland grinning with that dirty
glint in his eyes.
“I might be,” he teases as he nips at my neck.
“No more today. I am officially cutting you
off,” I warn him.
Roland chuckles before kissing me once more.
Then he moves toward the coffee pot.
“I didn’t hear you complain’ last night,” he
chuckles as he sets up the coffee.
“Well, you will today,” I giggle.
Roland laughs as he grabs mugs from the
cabinet.
“You feel like goin’ out later? I wanna take
Drake fishin’,” he says.
A smile crosses my face. Drake has always
wanted to go fishing. My heart swells in my chest
and I’m forced to fight back the tears that want to
fall.
“He would love that. He’s always wanted to
go.”
“Good. I just need to run by the clubhouse first
and then we can go,” he says.
The kitchen is silent for a few minutes in which
we both move around doing mundane things like
making breakfast together when it suddenly turns to
chaos and screams.
Booming sounds vibrate the walls as windows
shatter. The coffee pot that Roland has just been
holding explodes as he drops it and lunges at me.
The whole scene happens in slow motion. My body
hits the floor with a thud as Roland lands on top of
me. That’s when I hear it.
“Mom? Dad?”
I hear Drake’s screams and they’re like a stake
to the heart. I scramble around trying to force
Roland off me so that I can get to him, but he
moves first. He’s yelling at me, but I don’t hear a
thing. I watch as he stands and runs through the
living room as more shots ring throughout the
house. Crawling across the floor I go as quickly as I
can until I get to Drake’s room. Roland sees me,
grabs me by the arm, and drags me toward him.
“Get in the bathroom. Stay there and stay
down,” his words hit me hard.
I grab Drake and we both move quickly into the
bathroom to huddle together. Drake sobs not
knowing what’s happening until we hear Roland
screaming, “You motherfucker!”
More shots sound throughout the house, but I
stay curled around Drake. We hold each other
tightly and when the door is kicked open I scream.
Roland stands in front of us with blood dripping
down his arm. My heart nearly leaps out of my
chest. It’s so wrong, but in this moment I see just
how perfect he is. His chest is heaving for air and
sweat drips down his body.
“We need to move. Get dressed,” he tells
Drake.
Drake moves out of my arms and runs back into
his room. Roland storms toward our room with me
right behind him. I grab my shoes and quickly slip
them on while he grabs his shirt and cut.
“Who was that?” I ask while knowing I won’t
get an answer.
Roland looks over his shoulder at me and gives
me the not now look. I don’t push my luck as I grab
my phone and stuff it into my pocket.
“Get Drake. We’re goin’ out the back,” Roland
says with hard eyes.
I nod once before I go down the hall to be
greeted by my son with a smirk on his face.
“What are you smiling for?” I ask him a little
confused.
“I never thought I’d be in a shootout mom. It
was just like on the tv, only live!”
Drake’s expression is priceless, although I don’t
see the excitement in nearly being shot to death.
Roland chuckles behind me.
“That’s my boy. Let’s get out of here before
they decide to come back,” he says as he moves
past me and throws his arm around Drake.
“Did you see the hole in my wall? Do we have
to fix it? Can it just stay there?” Drake asks like this
is just one of his video games.
“You sure as hell are mine, huh?” Roland asks
with a laugh while looking down at his son. I take
this opportunity no matter how strange it is to just
watch the two of them.
“Yeah. Do you get shot at a lot? Your arm is still
bleeding dad. Wow. You got shot?”
I find myself wondering if I’ve let him play just
a few too many video games.
“It’s just a graze. I won’t even remember it
happened in a few weeks,” Roland says.
Is this normal? Why are they discussing bullet
wounds? I want it to stop. I want to step in and say
something, but the look on their faces has me
shutting my mouth. This father and son interaction,
even if the topic is a little out there, is magical. I
can see them bonding and it makes my heart happy.
“Get in the truck. I’ll have Ink show you where
that bullet is still stuck in his leg later,” Roland
says. I see Drake’s eyes widen.
“Okay. I’m in,” Drake hollers as he climbs into
the back of the truck.
Roland turns to look at me, waiting for me to
get in as well, but I can’t move when the smile
crosses his face.
“What?” I ask while shaking my head. I don’t
think I can form words. Roland stalks slowly
toward me bringing his hand up to cup my cheek.
“I love you, both of you.”
That’s all I need to hear. His lips press firmly to
mine. It’s a soft, sweet kiss before he pulls back.
“Let’s go. We’ve got a date,” he says as he
walks back around the truck.
“After all of this you still want to go?” I ask.
“Why the hell not? This ain’t shit. I know who
it was and I’ll get it handled. I wanna take my boy
fishin’ Molly.”
“We’re going fishing?” Drake squeals from the
back of the truck.
Roland starts it up and pulls out while
constantly checking his surroundings.
“You even been on a boat Drake?” he asks.
“No. Are we going on one?”
“Damn right we are. I’m gonna teach you how
to fish.”
The excitement in both of them warms my
insides. They are truly father and son. It makes me
sad that they’ve missed so much of this together. I
wish I could change the past, but there is nothing I
can do but try to make the future better.
“Mom are you coming?” Drake asks pulling me
from my thoughts.
“Why? This a boy’s only trip?” I ask teasingly.
“Hell no. It’s a family trip,” Roland answers.
“Yeah mom, it’s a family trip. Besides I want to
see you get sick when I touch the worms.”
“That’s just gross. We aren’t touching worms
Drake.”
“Like hell we’re not. How the hell do you think
we’re gonna catch anything without touching
worms?” Roland asks with a playful smile on his
face.
“I don’t know, but not with worms.”
“God, I love you babe.”
24
Reaper
I
kept my cool in front of Drake and Molly. I
didn’t want them to see how volatile the situation
really is. I know that it was Ramirez’s guys. I can’t
believe that fuck had the balls to send them after
me at my own house. Viking called the prospects
and he has them on their way over to my house to
clean that shit up, but that does little to ease my
mind.
“Sit the fuck down,” Viking snaps at me.
“Fuck you. That was my family in that house
brother. They could have shot my kid.”
Snapping back at him isn’t ideal. I need to
remain strong for them, but fuck. How do you do
that when some piece of shit was gunning for you
when your wife and kid were in the house? It’s a
tough pill to swallow. I’ve seen it with the other
guys that had families and all, but I was the loner
back then. I didn’t have anything to look forward
to, but I do now, and that’s the part that scares the
shit out of me.
Someone trying to take away the time I have
left with my son is simply out of the question.
“I got a call out to Romans. They are lookin’
around to see what they can dig up. I sent Charlie
and some of the boys out also just in case they
decided to stick around. Ink’s callin’ around to see
what he can dig up too. I want you on lock down
here until we can figure this shit out,” Viking
orders.
Fuck that. Fuck him.
“Can’t do that right now. I promised my boy a
fishin’ trip.”
Viking’s head snaps in my direction and his eyes
go wide.
“Are you serious? You just about got killed and
you’re tryin’ to go fishin’? Reaper come the fuck
on. You know he could be out there just waitin’ for
you to take one wrong step!”
His roar means nothing to me. His fire, the way
he leads his club, I respect the hell out of, but this is
personal.
“You don’t get it Viking. My kid’s dyin’ brother.
Maybe not today, but it is happenin’ and it’s coming
fast. I need this time with him. Do you know how
much of a fuckin’ failure I am? I failed him. His
whole fuckin’ life was shit because of me. Because
I stopped lookin’ for them. I live with that guilt
eatin’ away at me every goddamn day. I know
Ramirez’s guys are out there somewhere, but I need
this man.”
I won’t beg him. I won’t listen to him either. He
doesn’t understand that this could be the last
chance I have to take my son out and be a real
father to him. That thought alone makes my head
spin, but at the end of the day I need him to know
that I love him and I want him. I need him to
understand that. And I sure as hell want him to
experience as much as he can before he has to go.
“Shit, I get it. I want you on the burner phone
every hour. One fuckin’ hour passes without a call
and I’m movin’ in. You got it?” I nod my head and
Viking pulls his hand through his hair. “Fuckin’
bullshit,” he grumbles under his breath.
“Thanks brother. This means a lot to him, and it
means even more to me. I don’t know how much
time I have left with him,” I say.
Viking looks up with a look of understanding
across his face. “You got time. The kid is like his
dad. A tough son of a bitch. Now, get the fuck out
of my office before I change my mind.” I grunt and
turn to leave when he speaks again, “Watch your
fuckin’ ass out there. I know you’ll be on a boat,
but still.”
I flick two fingers in the air over my shoulder so
that he knows that I heard him. I head into the main
room and I can hear Drake making some strange
noises. When I come around the corner I can see
why. I lean against the wall and cross my arms as I
watch the way my son interacts with the other
guys.
“That is so cool!” Drake screams as Ink show
him how he can move the bullet around under his
skin. Why that motherfucker doesn’t just cut it out
is beyond me. He’s kept it like that for almost a
year now.
My eyes flicker to where Molly stands in the
corner with Fin. He looks at her. Really looks at
her. Something about that pisses me off and yet
calms me at the same time. The way they interact
with each other is different. It’s like they’re best
friends, but there’s something more too. It’s the
same way I used to look at her when we dated.
“He doesn’t mean anything by it,” Mason says
coming to stand next to me.
“I know. I think it’s a good thing. When I’m
gone she’ll need someone.”
“And you think that someone is Fin?”
“Look at them. You ever date a girl when you
were younger man?” I ask looking over at them.
“Yeah.”
“How did you look at her?”
Mason looks up at me and then back at the two
of them.
“Just like Fin is,” he says softly. “He won’t act
on it. He respects you too much Reaper. You’re his
brother.”
“I know Mason. I know he won’t but look at
that connection. Look at his eyes. He’ll be there for
her when she needs it the most and I can’t be
pissed off at that.”
Admitting that out loud took some fucking guts.
Fact is, I want to smash his fucking face in for
having that connection with my woman, but I also
know that when I’m not here she won’t have to be
alone. She is stubborn as hell, but Fin knows his
way around that stubbornness. I don’t for a second
believe that either of them would betray me while
I’m alive, but that means nothing later.
“You need to stop playin’ matchmaker. You’re
alive motherfucker, or did you forget that part?”
Mason slaps a hand across my chest which makes
me laugh.
“Goddamn right I am. I’m not playin’ shit. I just
call it how I see it.”
“Well, then your eyes are fucked. Go fishin’
before I tell Viking you’re still here and he chains
your ass to a chair.”
I watch Mason walk away with a smirk on his
face when her eyes catch mine. The slow, sexy
smile on her face just melts me. She turns and
slowly walks toward me with our eyes connected
the whole way.
“Are you okay?” she asks when she’s finally in
front of me.
I nod once and lean down to kiss her. “Perfect.
You ready?” I whisper against her lips.
“Yeah. Drake’s excited.”
“I am too. I wanna spend some time with the
two of you,” I tell her.
Pressing a kiss to her lips I pull away and look
over to Drake.
“Hey Drake. You ready?” I holler at him.
His head pops up and I see a smile on his face.
He’s fucking perfect.
“Yeah. Let’s go,” he yells climbing to his feet
and running towards us.
This is it. My wife and my son. My family. My
heart. This is everything.
25
Molly
T
he boat tilts and sways and so does my
stomach. I feel like I’m going to lose the lunch we
ate before coming out here. I can’t believe I let him
talk me into coming out on this boat.
“Hold your pole right here and throw it out like
this,” Roland says.
He’s so animated. I love watching him with
Drake. He’s showing and teaching him so many
new things. It means the world to me. They both
mean the world to me. Drake throws out his line
just like his dad showed him.
“Good. That’s good,” Roland encourages him.
“Now we wait until we get a bite.”
Roland moved around Drake and sits down
next to me. He tosses his arm over my shoulder and
pulls me against him.
“Not a fan of the boat?” he asks with a laugh.
“It’s not that bad now. When you drive I want
to lose it though.”
He laughs and tugs me closer.
“This is nice, yeah? Just the three of us.”
I glance up at him, smile, and say, “It’s the best.
Thank you for doing this.”
“Never thank me for bein’ with my family. This
is all I’ve ever wanted Mols. You know that.”
His words are sincere which only drives yet
another stake through my chest. It hurts to know
that he’s missed so much time with Drake. I
understand now that my actions caused this. I can
handle the pain of it eating away at me, but he
shouldn’t have to.
“Whatever you’re thinkin’ stop it,” he warns
me.
“Dad, I got one!”
Drake’s yell breaks our silence. Roland jumps
up from his seat and rushes as fast of he can next to
his son. He helps hold the pole with Drake as they
reel in what he caught.
“It’s a good one son. You can keep that one.
We’ll get your mom to cook it up later,” Roland
says while smirking at me over his shoulder.
I laugh and shake my head as I watch the two
of them working together. Roland gets the fish off
of the hook and tosses it into a bucket before
helping Drake again. The look of pure happiness
can be seen on both of their faces. When Roland
finally comes back to my side I’m nearly in tears.
“Why the tears?” he asks as he wipes my
cheeks.
“I’m going to miss this,” I barely choke the
words out before Roland huffs. I glance over and
see the anger in his eyes.
“You keep sayin’ that like you’re just sittin’
here waitin’ on him to be gone. I’m fuckin’ tired of
it Molly. He’s my son and I have to hope for the
best even if you’re not,” he snaps while keeping his
voice low so that Drake can’t hear him.
“I am preparing myself. I don’t know how this
shit works Roland. I’m sorry if it pisses you off that
this is how I deal with it,” I snap back at him.
I start to move when he grabs my arms. I look
back at him and he’s livid.
“This is how you deal? By bringin’ it up and
ruinin’ all the good moments we have left? You had
your time with him Molly. Even if it was a shitty
situation you still had him there. Don’t you dare
fuck up what time I have with him.”
With that he moves to stand and heads back
over to Drake. I let the tears fall as I let what he
said settle over me. I never meant it that way. My
time with Drake has been precious and I do feel
horrible that Roland didn’t get to spend those years
with us.
I lean back and watch as the two most
important people in my life smile and share this
time together. My phone pings in my pocket. I
silently thank whoever it is that they broke the
tension I was feeling. Sliding my phone out I click
on the message icon. Sliding my finger across the
screen I suck in a breath.
Unknown: How comfortable you look with
him. Such a shame it won’t last long.
My heart races. How did he get this number?
Fin set this phone up when Roland went to prison.
No one but Fin, Roland, and Viking have this
number. My eyes jerk around, but all I see is water.
We’re out here far enough from land that we can’t
be seen. How does he know I’m with him? Does he
just assume?
“Roland,” I say his name softly afraid Tom can
somehow hear me. My breathing speeds up a little
faster. He can’t fuck up the plan I had. He can’t
just step in and ruin it all. “Roland. We have a
problem,” I say a little louder. I glance around
again. He still didn’t hear me. “Roland!” I scream
this time. Both he and Drake turn around to look at
me.
“What the hell is wrong with you? You look
pale,” Roland says as he moves quickly toward me.
He kneels in front of me and looks up at me with
those big green eyes of his. “Talk to me,” he says.
“My phone. Message. He knows,” I say not
quite making much sense.
Roland grabs my phone and clicks through the
messages. Much the same as I did, he glances
around quickly before his gaze comes back to meet
mine.
“This means nothin’. He ain’t havin’ you.
Either of you. Do you understand me? He is not
gonna touch what belongs to me ever again,”
Roland says through gritted teeth. His eyes are
wild. No, they’re feral.
“Roland I won’t let him near Drake.”
“I won’t let him near either one of you. Trust
me Mols. Just trust me on this, okay?”
I nod my head as he slips my phone into his
pocket. He reaches for me and pulls me into his
arms. I take a moment to gaze over his shoulder at
Drake. He’s lost in his fishing, but I can tell by the
sway of his body that something is off.
“Drake?” I call his name. Roland pulls away
and looks at me funny. “Something’s wrong
Roland.” He pulls away from me before spinning
around to look at Drake.
“Hey Drake, you good?”
Drake turns his head and throws up before he
drops to his knees. Drake heaves as his dad and I
rush to his side. Roland moves around and grabs a
bottle of water and a rag.
“Come on Drake. Sit up for me,” he says. His
voice sounds panicked. I can’t say that I’m far
behind. We pull Drake up until he’s sitting, but I
can tell he’s still weak.
“I barfed on the boat,” he manages to say
which causes us to laugh.
“Good thing the boat’s near water then, yeah?”
Roland looks to have calmed slightly. Holding the
bottle to his lips Drake takes a sip.
“Guess we better get you home.”
Roland passes me the bottle before he reaches
down to lift Drake effortlessly in his arms. He
walks him over and sits him back on the seat.
“We’ll get that cleaned up and head back,” he
tells Drake before looking back at me.
I give him a slight nod. Roland frowns and then
turns to start the boat up.
26
Reaper
D
ownward spiral. The doc’s words ring over
and over in my head. Fuck him. He can take his
medical bullshit and shove it up his fucking ass. He
doesn’t know my son like I do; doesn’t know that
he’s a fighter. He has heart. I know if anyone can
do this it’s him. Fuck everyone else.
I tuck Drake in and press a kiss to his head
before I leave the room. Stepping into the main
room I spot Viking and Fin at the bar. I walk over
and drop onto the stool next to them.
“He okay?” Fin asks. I can hear the concern in
his voice.
“No.” I grab the beer that is set in front of me.
“He’s dyin’ man. My fuckin’ kid is dyin’ and there
isn’t shit I can do about it.”
My heart feels heavy. I feel fucking useless.
There is nothing. No medicine, transplant, or
treatment that can stop this.
“You’ve just gotta enjoy what you can Reaper.
That’s all there is left to do. Let him know that you
love him and that you ain’t goin’ anywhere,” Fin
says as he lifts his beer to his lips.
“He knows that. I’ve been doin’ everything I
can for him, but right before he got sick Mols got a
message on the burner phone. I assume it’s from
Tom.”
Fin’s bottle slams on the counter and his head
snaps around to look at me.
“What the fuck?” Viking mumbles.
“I set that phone up Reaper. No one has that
number.”
Fin’s eyes are wild with rage. He wants to get to
Tom as much as I do. I can see it in his eyes and I
don’t blame him. Whatever that shit is between him
and Molly I respect it because it puts Fin on top of
his game.
“Heard that,” I grumble. “Somehow he got it.
Said he’s seen her with me, but that it won’t last
long.”
Viking slams his hands on the counter in front
of us while Fin curses under his breath as Ink walks
back in.
“What’s got all of you fired up? I can
practically see the goddamn smoke billowin’ off of
you three,” Ink says as he leans against the bar.
“That son of a bitch somehow got the burner
number. Texted Molly while they were out,” Viking
informs him. Ink shakes his head and grabs a beer.
“Fuck that shit. Let’s roll on his ass. Can’t
Mystic get us somethin’ through the burner?”
Viking just shakes his head. “He’s workin’ on
some other shit for the No Cal boys. This is all on
us,” he says.
My heart is torn. I want to go after Tom, god
knows I do, but at the same time I want to be here
with Drake. If we really are down to his final days,
I want to be there for them. I don’t want my son
having to face the end of his life without me. As
much as it’s ripping me apart inside, I know I have
to stay strong for him. It’s hard to watch your child
going through something like this. It kills a piece of
you. In my heart I know I’ll never be the same after
this. Maybe this is exactly what Crow felt. The
helplessness. Knowing that your kid is supposed to
have their whole life ahead of them but it’s being
cut short. Crow was so far lost I didn’t understand
it. I do now. I understand the pain and anger that he
felt and I can’t say that I blame him for what he did
anymore.
“I’m gonna make some calls and see what I can
find out. I put out some feelers the other day, but
we need to stir the pot yeah? He’s out there. He’s
close and now we need to flush that little roach
bastard out.”
Ink’s eyes are wild and we all know that look.
He’s coming unhinged and when that happens all
hell will break loose. None of us say a word. We
just nod. Ink’s his own brand of crazy. We don’t
interfere when he gets like that. There’s no point.
“I’d say this shit is about to hit home,” Fin
adds.
“Goddamn right it is. We need to be ready. Get
the boys rounded up. I’m callin’ church. We need
to handle this shit in a timely manner for the sake
of everyone involved,” Viking says in his stern
tone.
He stands from the stool and heads toward the
office when I glance over at Fin. His hands are tight
around his beer bottle and his eyes are a little
distant.
“Need to ask you somethin’,” I tell him.
Fin turns to me with a look of anger dancing in
his eyes. He gives me a chin lift to let me know that
it’s okay to ask.
“This thing with you and Molly, you all in?”
“What the fuck does that mean? This thing with
me and Molly? There ain’t no thing with me and
her,” he spits out and turns his head the other way.
“Bullshit. We all see it brother.”
“You lookin’ to take your anger out on someone
Reaper? Go right the fuck ahead brother. That’s
what I’m here for. Talkin’ about somethin’ between
us? Fuck that! Even if there was, I know my place
man.”
“I know that look in your eyes Fin. I get it man.
I really do. I don’t need you to open your goddamn
mouth and tell me what I already see, but I can say
this, I respect the fuck out of you for not actin’ on it
while I’m here. But, when I’m gone I’m glad to
know that she’s gonna have someone to help her
through it all,” I tell him in all honesty.
Most men wouldn’t understand. Hell, I barely
understand it myself. Admitting that your wife is
going to need another man later in life is a hard
thing to swallow. You have to really trust in who
they are and I do.
“Where the fuck are you goin’?” he asks as his
eyes come to rest on mine.
“After I get Tom I’m goin’ after Ramirez. He
fucked me over. He came after my family, my club.
I climbed into bed with that motherfucker, but I
sure as fuck will crawl my way back out.”
Fin watches me intently and shakes his head
slowly from side to side. “You said it yourself
Reaper, if you go back in you ain’t comin’ back
out. Why the hell would you wanna do that shit?
You got your kid and your woman here,” he asks
me clearly confused.
“My kid’s dyin’ Fin. There ain’t shit I can do
about it. I’m not leavin’ this world without cause
brother, and protectin’ what’s mine seems like a
damn good cause.”
Fin watches me as his face remains passive.
“You’re really losin’ your shit here Reaper. You’re
my best goddamn friend and you know it,” Fin
snaps roaring loudly.
“And that’s exactly why I’m askin’ you to take
care of her Fin. I see the connection there. I don’t
care if there is nothin’ between the two of you. I
just need you to tell me that you’ll take care of
her.”
I can nearly hear myself begging him. If that’s
what it takes then I’ll be man enough to do it.
Molly has had one hell of a life already and without
me or Drake I don’t think she’ll be able to move on
with her life. I need to know that someone is going
to be there for her. The club will always have my
back. I know this, but I mean on an emotional level.
“Fuck man,” Fin says tugging at his hair. “I’ll
be there Reaper. You know I’d do anything for you.
This is beyond fucked up though.”
“I know Fin. I know it is, but movin’ forward I
need to know that this shit is covered. It just calms
me, ya know? I need to know that when I’m not
here that she has someone to rely on. She ain’t
gonna make it by herself. I know her man.”
“She won’t have to,” Fin says looking down at
his hands. “I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”
27
Molly
I
lie with my eyes closed tightly on the bed in
Roland’s room. My heart feels too heavy in my
chest. I’ve never known true pain until the doctor
said his health was declining. I never knew what
true heartbreak was. Loosing Roland hurt, but
losing my son hurts far more than anything in the
world. I swallow hard and will the tears away. I
should be in there with Drake, but seeing his little
sleeping body lying there so peacefully almost
broke me and I knew I needed to step out for a
minute.
Every time I look at him another piece of me
dies. I wonder if this is what Crow felt? Did he
suffer through for so long until he finally snapped? I
can’t imagine a life without my son in it. He’s my
light, my star, and my rock.
The door creaks open and Roland walks in with
a solemn and sad look on his face.
“You okay? Taz was lookin’ for you,” he says as
he closes the door behind him.
“I don’t know anymore,” I admit. It’s the truth.
I don’t know how I will ever be okay with this.
“I understand that. I’m right here with you
babe.”
He slides his cut down his arms and tosses it
into the chair before he slips his shirt over his head.
I can’t help but watch the way he moves. The way
his muscles ripple with every move. Roland was
never a skinny guy, but he is so filled out and full of
strength now.
“You’re droolin’,” he teases me with a perfect
smile on his face.
“You’re beautiful.”
His eyes lock with mine. Electricity snaps and
crackles between us.
“Is that right?”
I nod my head and bite my bottom lip to keep
myself from moaning. The look of pure sex in his
eyes sends a need shooting through my entire body.
Those green emerald eyes hold my entire world
inside of them. My entire world. Roland loses his
jeans and boxers then walks toward the bed slowly.
“You gonna be a good girl tonight? I need you
Mols.”
Just the breathless way he says my name sends
me reeling. I would give this man anything in the
world. I reach for him and he climbs on the bed and
falls on top of me. His hard body presses against
mine. I love that feeling. It’s safe. It’s perfect. It’s
home.
“I love you Roland.”
He watches me for a long second before leaning
down and kissing me. His tongue plunges into my
mouth and devours me with the heat of his kiss. His
lips work mine and I’m lost in all that he gives me.
One of his hands slides down to my side and shoves
my shorts to the side. In a matter of just seconds
he’s buried so deeply inside of me that I don’t
know where either one of us ends or begins.
Things between us were always so perfect. Life
was prefect and moving forward. Reconnecting
with him was scary, but we fit together flawlessly
just like we always have. The first day I met him
outside the grocery store I just knew he was
special. I knew he was different and he’d never let
me down.
“What are you thinkin’?” he growls as his hips
rock into me.
I’m lost in everything that is Roland. From the
feel of him between my thighs to the scent of his
skin. It’s all I could ever ask for.
“You,” I whisper breathlessly.
He groans and changes his angle. Thrust after
sweet perfect thrust he takes me the way he used
to. He’s gentle but he gives me everything he
knows I need at the perfect time. When I begin to
dig my nails into his back a rumble emits from his
chest.
“You want it hard baby? Is that what you’re
after? You want me to fuck you until you can’t
breathe?” he whispers into my ear. When I nod my
head, he pulls back with a smirk on his face. “All
you had to do was ask.”
He grabs my leg and tosses it over his shoulder.
This new position gives him all the access he needs
to me. He pounds into me so hard that the
headboard starts banging against the wall, no doubt
letting anyone in the next room know what’s
happening and I don’t care. I love feeling him
inside of me. Dominating me in such a way no one
else will ever be able to do. My love for Roland
skyrockets as he brings me to orgasm. Lights flash
behind my eyes and his grunts fill my ears. When
he releases inside of me the entire world falls away
and everything slips into place. Everything that was
wrong is now right again.
Roland pulls out of me breathlessly and drops
onto the mattress next to me. I roll to my side and
run my fingers through his hair.
“Damn woman,” he huffs which makes me
giggle.
I scoot closer to him and rest my head on his
chest. A tear slides down my cheek.
“You’re cryin’.”
“No.”
“Babe, I can feel it on my skin. We need to be
strong now. He needs to know that everything’s
okay,” he says softly.
“Is it okay? Really? He’s dying Roland.” More
tears fall as he engulfs me in his arms.
“I don’t want him to suffer Mols. If he needs us
to tell him everything is okay then that’s what
we’re gonna do. I want this to be easy on him. I
know it’s gonna be hell on us, but for him it doesn’t
have to be. I’ve seen death before I was in this club
and I don’t want him to suffer any more than he
has to Mols. I’ll do whatever I need to do to make
sure that doesn’t happen.”
His tone is firm and unrelenting. He isn’t going
to back down on this.
“What do we need to do now?” I ask trying to
remain as calm and collected as I can. I don’t want
Drake to suffer either. I want him to be at peace.
“We need to be there for him. We hold his
hand. We do whatever the fuck it is that he asks us
to do. We’re all he has now and I sure as hell won’t
let him spend what’s left of his time hurtin’ or
thinkin’ about anything but bein’ happy. It’s our job
to make sure that happens as his parents.” His
words burn a hole through my heart.
“You’re a great father Roland. You have made
such an impact on him in such a short amount of
time. I can’t tell you how much that mean to me. I
always knew you’d be an amazing father,” I tell
him truthfully.
“You’re an amazin’ mom baby. You kept that
boy safe and still managed to raise him right. Even
in a shitty situation. I don’t know how you did it,
but I’m damn proud of you.” Roland shirts and
presses a kiss to the top of my head.
“We are good parents,” I mumble as he runs his
hand up and down my back until I finally drift off
to sleep.
Dreams come and go, but the one constant is
the love I have for this man.
28
Roland
D
oc said Drake isn’t doing well. He’s slowly
slipping into a coma. I think that’s the part that kills
me the most. The fact that I can’t hear him talk to
me. I still talk to him though. I let him know that I
love him and when he needs to go, he can. Those
were the hardest words I’ve ever had to say to
anyone. I feel so cheated by life. I don’t have
enough time with him. I need more time. I want
more. I know we don’t get to make those decisions
and I’ve never been one to pray, but I sure as hell
have been. I’d trade places with him in a heartbeat.
I’d take all of his pain and suffering and make it my
own, but I can’t.
“Are you sure about this Roland?” I look up at
the lawyer and nod my head. If I wasn’t sure he
wouldn’t be here.
“Okay. Just sign where it’s highlighted.”
I take the pen and sign on all of the highlighted
lines. It feels like I’m signing my life away, I am
signing my life away; in more ways than one.
“You have some time before I file them. Would
you like for me to wait and let you think on this?”
he asks which further aggravates me. I jerk my eyes
to his and let him see the fury in me. I let him see
the anger that his questioning has sparked.
“Do you honestly think I would have paid your
ass and called you if I wanted to wait on this? If I
wanted to wait, I wouldn’t have signed the
motherfuckin’ papers now would I?” My roar rips
through the silent room. The prick jumps and
shakes his head.
“You’re right Mr. Sanders. I apologize. I’ll get
this put through as quickly as I can,” he says in a
rush as he gathers his papers and stuffs them back
into his little briefcase. He turns on his heel and
hurries out of the door just as Mason is coming in.
He eyes him up and down before stalking toward
me.
“The fuck was that?” he asks pointing over his
shoulder at the door.
“Lawyer.”
“Obviously. Not many brothers walk around in
those fancy suits. What the fuck was he doin’
here?” he asks as he grabs a beer and motions to
me asking if I want one. I nod my head and ready
myself to fill him in.
“He’s a divorce lawyer. I signed the papers,” I
tell him as I take a long pull from the bottle in front
of me.
“You did what? What the fuck is that about
Reaper?” he snaps loudly. I glance around quickly
making sure Molly isn’t anywhere within hearing
distance.
“It’s about givin’ Molly a new start when I’m
not here. She deserves at least that much.” I take
another drink as Mason eyes me. “What?” I ask.
“You’re still bent on going back in there?”
Mason asks.
I nod my head and rest my arms on the counter
in front of me. I take in the wedding band on my
finger. I never took it off because it hurt too much
to think about. I reach for it now, pull it off, and
spin it on the counter.
“I’m goin’ in. I’ve gotta make this shit right.
The club doesn’t deserve a war because of me. I
just need a little time with my boy before I set my
plan in motion.”
“Seems to me you’re already settin’ it in motion
to go with those papers. You think this is the best
thing for her?” he asks as he leans on the counter. I
slap the ring so it stops spinning before I slip it back
on my hand.
“Yeah. I know it is. I’m gonna get Tom out of
the picture and that’s it. That’s the end brother.”
“That’s bullshit. You know that, right? This isn’t
just about her. You have all of us. We’re a goddamn
family Reaper. You are the stubbornest son of a
bitch I’ve ever met in my life.” Mason grits his
teeth, but all he’s doing is pissing me off a little
more than I already was.
“Shut the fuck up Mason,” I warn him. My
nerves are on edge and my patience is running thin
today.
“Fuck you! The sun doesn’t rise and set just for
you. You’re being a fuckin’ coward.”
“Stop pushin’ me Mason,” I growl.
“Oh. Is the big bad Reaper getting’ pissed off?
You think I give a fuck? So the world dealt you a
shitty hand. Get the fuck over it. You’re more of a
man than this, aren’t you? Since when do you let
what God has done fuck you over? Huh? You’re
called the fuckin’ Reaper for a reason.”
And… that’s it. He’s pushed me too far. I rise
from my stool and narrow my gaze on his.
“Enough,” Mason chuckles as he moves around
the bar and looks me dead in the eye.
“Go fuck yourself. You want to wallow away
like a pussy? Go right on ahead. Let them win. Let
Tom, Ramirez, and God fuckin’ win.”
He throws his hands out to the side to make his
point, but that’s when I snap. I lunge toward him
with my hands balled into fists. The first strike
lands, but the second one doesn’t. Mason has me
around the neck and slams me into to the floor
before I know what’s happened.
“Fight like a man Reaper. Let that shit out,” he
screams into my face.
I gasp for air as his grip tightens. Twisting in his
grip I throw another punch landing on his cheek.
Mason’s head snaps sideways and his grip falters. I
shove him off me and climb to my feet ready for
another blow.
“Stop!” I can hear Whitley yelling behind us.
That isn’t going to stop us now. He wanted this. He
practically begged for it. Pushing and taunting me.
“You wanna do this?” I ask him.
“Damn right I do,” he snarls.
He rushes me trying to catch me off guard, but
I’m ready for him. I deliver a good blow to his ribs,
but he counters with one to my jaw. I can hear the
girls screaming for us to stop, but that isn’t going to
happen. We keep going, not giving a shit. The more
we punch the better I feel. This was something I
really needed. I’m not really pissed at Mason, it’s
more that I’m pissed that I missed ten years of my
son’s life. I’m pissed that he’s now lying in a room
down the hall dying and that there’s nothing I can
do to fix it.
I didn’t hear the others come in when Mason
and I are yanked apart. Whitley rushes to his side
trying to wipe the blood from his face, but he swats
her away and keeps his eyes trained on me.
“What the fuck has gotten into you
motherfuckers?” Viking stands in the middle
looking between us.
“Your boy here has a death wish,” Mason roars.
I chuckle and wipe my lips on the back of my hand.
“You need to learn how to mind your own
damn business Mason,” I say as I point at the
fucker.
“You are my business. Did you forget who the
VP is? Did you forget that we’re all family here?
Did all that just slip your mind when you made that
choice?” he asks. I get it, I truly do. This is just
what needs to be done.
“Where were you guys at?” I ask Viking to
make my point.
“One of the warehouses over on Planton
burned to the goddamn ground,” he says.
I raise my eyebrow and look at Mason. “Who
do you suppose could have done that?” I ask being
a condescending asshole.
“Fuck you Reaper! You’re bein’ a fuckin’
coward,” he roars once more. When I start to move
toward him Viking stops me. His hand stays resting
on my chest as his eyes flash with anger.
“Is this about what I think it’s about?” he looks
to me. I nod my head once.
“Jesus fuckin’ Christ,” Mason mumbles under
his breath and shakes his head.
“It isn’t just that. Why don’t you tell him? Tell
him what else you just did,” Mason eggs me on.
“Signed divorce papers.”
“You did what?” Fin snaps as he pushes his way
to the front of the group. “What the hell are you
thinkin’?”
“I’m thinkin’ that she will have a fresh start.
She deserves that. I was thinkin’ maybe she could
move on and live a life that she’s always wanted.
I’m not gonna be able to provide her that and I for
damn sure won’t make her a widow.”
“So that’s it?” her voice shakes my body to the
core.
I hate the sound of her voice when’s she sad or
upset. I close my eyes and tip my head back while
trying to control my breathing before I turn to face
her. When I open my eyes and look into hers I feel
like shit. I feel like I’ve let her down, and in so
many ways I have.
“You don’t understand Molly. This life. This
thing that’s happenin’ is all my fault. I didn’t
protect you all those years ago like I should have. I
didn’t do my job as a man and that’s what fuckin’
kills me. Every time I look at you I see the mistakes
I’ve made. I should have kept you safe from him. I
failed. I should have kept my son safe. I should
have been there to watch his first steps, to see him
crawl, and to teach him how to play football. I
fucked it all up Mols. I’ve made so many mistakes
in my goddamn life. I couldn’t possibly fix them all.
But, this one? I can fix this one. When I’m gone
you can move on. You can start over and make
yourself the life you’ve always dreamed of. You
can be someone. You won’t have a worry in the
goddamn world because I’m gonna make them all
right first.”
The room is deadly silent around us. The air is
thick. The tension is high. Molly stares at me, a
mask of emotions on her face.
“You really think that’s what I want? Do you
even care what I want?”
“It’s not about what any of us want Molly. It’s
about what’s right. Don’t you get that?”
“I get that you want to run off and leave me all
alone. I get that you want to fix everything, but
there are some things you just can’t fix Roland. If
anyone can see that it should be you!”
“I can fix this.” I step closer to her now. I’m
standing mere inches from her. “I can make what I
did to fuck this up right. It isn’t just us Molly. It’s
the club too. They are my family as much as you
are and I can’t turn my back on what I did to
them.”
Her eyes fill with tears. The moment between
us is intense, but it’s broken when Taz screams.
“Get in here,” her words rip the silence and
shred any hope that any of us thought we had.
29
Molly
L
oss is hard. It’s even harder when it’s your
kid. My heart has never felt so empty. We buried
Drake two weeks ago. Nothing has been the same
since. I drink until I become numb. Roland is
constantly on the move. It’s like he can’t stay still
or he’ll lose himself. I can’t say that I blame him.
We all grieve in our own ways. We all hate and hurt
differently. I don’t hate Roland for what he’s doing.
I hate myself for not being stronger. I think about it
every day of my life. Why didn’t he fight harder?
Why didn’t I figure out something sooner? I always
come up empty.
“You need anything else?” Fin asks as he sits on
the couch next to me.
I hold up the bottle of Jack and shake my head
no. This is all I need. As long as it makes the pain
and anger go away, I’m good.
“You can’t drink yourself out of what you’re
feelin’ Molly.”
“No? Maybe some coke will help?” I tell him.
“I’ve been there too. Drugs don’t ease it either
darlin’. I would know.”
Fuck him. He doesn’t know shit. He never lost
his child. The one thing that he loved more than
anything in the world. I did. How dare he tell me
that?
“Leave me the fuck alone Fin.”
“Wish I could babe. Look, I just wanted to let
you know that we found Tom. We’re gonna be
movin’ in on him soon. You know what that
means?” he asks as if I give a shit. I don’t. Not
anymore. Roland made his choices.
“Yeah, it means that I never have to look at his
fucking face again. It means that everyone I loved
will be gone. It means I’m alone. I’m all alone Fin.”
The first part came out strong, but the rest came out
in a mess of tears. Fin pulls me to him as I cry. “I’m
so fucking alone.”
“You’re not. You need to talk to him. Tell him
how much you need him Molly. Make him rethink
this shit,” he urges.
I pull away and wipe my face. “I’ve tried Fin.
Don’t you think I’ve tried? He doesn’t want me
anymore.”
“That’s not true.”
Roland’s voice sounds from behind me. I look
over my shoulder and see him standing there in his
black jeans and a hoodie. No doubt he’s ready to go
down for his cause.
“Oh, it’s true all right. I know it is. Otherwise I
wouldn’t have those divorce papers sitting on the
counter.” Roland walks around the couch, but he
doesn’t sit.
“Give us a minute Fin.”
Fin squeezes my shoulder before he climbs to
his feet and walks away. Traitor. I thought he was
my friend.
“I love you Molly. You know that. I loved him
too. I loved him more than I can say, but this is
what has to be done to make sure everyone I have
left is safe. I need you to understand that. I couldn’t
face myself every goddamn day if somethin’
happened to you too.”
“You didn’t make him sick Roland,” the tears
start falling again.
“I know that, but I still felt helpless Mols. I
couldn’t do a fuckin’ thing to save him. Nothin’. Do
you know how that makes me feel? I feel worthless
as a dad. I fucked up. I won’t do that with you. You
can hate me until the day you die, you can curse
me and call me names. I don’t care Molly. I just
need to know that you’re safe. I need that closure.
Can’t you understand that?”
Roland turns on his heel and heads toward the
door. If this is the last time that I will get to see him
then I needed to tell him that I loved him, didn’t I?
I need him to know that much. I shove off of the
couch and stumble and sway as the liquor filters
through my veins.
“Roland,” I call out to him. He stops walking
and turns to face me. “You were a great father. He
loved you more than you know. I love you more
than you know. I understand it to a point, I just
need you to know that I’ve never stopped loving
you. My heart will never be the same.”
Letting that out was harder than I thought it
would be. Roland smirks as he walks over to me
and wraps his arms around me. He kisses me
roughly and slides his tongue into my mouth. After
a few minutes he slows the kiss before he pulls
back and rests his forehead against mine.
“Your heart doesn’t belong to me anymore
Mols. As much as I wish it did, it doesn’t. I’m sorry
that this is hurtin’ you. I’m sorry that I never found
the two of you. God, you have no idea how sorry I
am for that. I love you baby. I’ve loved you since
the first time I ever saw you. Remember me always
Mols.”
One more soft kiss and then Roland turns on his
heel and walks away from me. I’m not sure what
I’m supposed to feel right now. I don’t know which
way to turn and what the fuck to do. Fin steps in
next to me and his arm goes around my shoulder.
“He can still change his mind, ya know? Have
some faith, yeah?”
He kisses the top of my head and walks out the
same door Roland just did. I’m torn. I want to run
after Roland. I want to beg him to stay with me, but
that would be selfish. That would be me asking him
to do something he didn’t want to, and I know in
my heart that he thinks what he’s doing is the right
thing.
“Come on sweetheart,” Taz pulls me into her
side as the rest of the world becomes a blur.
My head isn’t in the right place anymore. It
hasn’t’ been for two weeks and now the pain is
only more intense. It feels as though my heart’s
being ripped from my body and someone stomped
it into the floor. Nothing else could possibly feel
this awful.
30
Reaper
D
eath was something I learned to be good
at. Killing people became an outlet for me. I
perfected it. The day I walked away from Molly
was the day I sealed my own fate. Molly was the
one that ran from me more than once. Now it was
my turn. We found Tom that same night. It was a
bittersweet moment for me.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” He asked
when he saw me step into his house.
The same fucking house. I was shocked as fuck
when we found him here. At first I didn’t believe
the guys when they told me. What kind of dumbass
comes back to the same place?
“Thought you might wanna talk,” I tell him.
Tom shoves out of his chair and watches me
closely. There is nowhere for him to go. The guys
have the house surrounded, just in case he tries to
run.
“I don’t think we have much to talk about. She
was always supposed to be mine. That whore of a
mother of hers just didn’t realize it. I told her over
and over. I guess that’s where Molly gets it from?”
His eyes are as evil as the devil. Son of a bitch,
I’m going to enjoy watching him die.
“You would think that would piss me off, but it
doesn’t. Watchin’ you die is payment enough for
what you did to them.”
“Them? I couldn’t stand the damn kid. I was
actually glad when she got him out of here.
Looking at him reminded me of you. It made me
fuckin’ sick,” he snarls.
This son of a bitch. I take a deep breath and try
to calm myself before the cops show up.
“He died ya know? Had cancer.”
“You must be so sad. Unfortunately, I’m not.
He was a bastard just like you. The kid thought he
had a set of balls on him.”
I can’t take it anymore. I move forward and
grab him around the neck and squeeze. Tom claws
at my hands in an attempt to get away from me.
“That was my kid. He was everything to me.
You took all that precious time away from me. He
had bigger balls than you ever did,” I growl.
The sirens are within hearing distance now.
“Not much longer now Tom.”
“Reaper. The cops are three minutes out,” Fin
says. I nod my head and glance over my shoulder
at him.
“Get everyone out of here. Remember your
promise Fin.” He closes his eyes like he wants to
say something, but I speak first, “You promised me.
Don’t fuckin’ fail me brother.” When he opens his
eyes he smiles at me.
“I promised you. I don’t break my promises
brother. She’ll be taken care of.”
I nod my head once and then watch him walk
back out of the house. In a matter of minutes the
cops are here with guns aimed. Yeah, I called in
and reported a man fitting my description
threatening to kill another man.
“Sleep tight Tom,” I whisper as I squeeze the
rest of his life out of him.
I could have made it worse. I could have drawn
out his death for hours, but what’s the point?
Letting him live longer than necessary seemed like
a waste of time to me.
The cops storm in screaming at me to let him
go and how they’ll shoot if I don’t. I don’t give a
shit. When I can sense them closing in on me, I
shift my grip and snap Tom’s neck. I can hear the
crunch of bone and it sends a shiver up my spine. I
didn’t want to leave any possible chance of them
being able to resuscitate the fucker.
I’ve been sentenced to life in prison. I stand
here in the yard with a handmade shank in my
hand, just contemplating my life. I had dreams of
what it would have been like for Molly and I if we
could have spent forever together. If Drake hadn’t
been sick. He would have played football and I
would have been the dad in the stands cheering him
on. But, none of that was my reality.
We are all destined to be something, and this
right here is my destiny. I look to my left and nod
my head at the two guys that are helping me. They
were paid extremely well for their services. All they
have to do is flank me until I can get in the middle
of the crowd that surrounds Ramirez. He made sure
to amp up his protection when he knew I was
coming back in. That alone makes it all worth it.
“I love you Mols. I’ll see you soon Drake,” I
mumble under my breath before I start to move.
My walk turns into a jog and in no time at all
I’m standing face to face with the fucker that
played me. The fucker that threatened my family.
His smirk nearly pisses me off, but I love the
surprise on his face when I shake the shank from
my sleeve and down into my hand.
His eyes widen as I move in. The blade moves
perfectly through his skin. Blood sprays from all
angles as I pull it free from his neck and stab it
under his ribs. I lose count of how many times I’ve
stabbed him before he falls.
Silence fills the yard before I feel it. That burn,
ache, the feeling of a blade entering my body. I
could scream and fight back, but why? This is my
fucking destiny. This is my fate. I always knew it
was coming. The day I stepped foot in here not too
long ago, I could feel it.
As the crowd closes in around me I hear my
bones crack and splinter. Pain explodes inside of
me. I crumble.
That’s when I see it. That’s when I see him. In
the darkness that surrounds me, there is one tiny
spot of light.
“Drake?”
“Hi dad!”
Afterword
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