SweetAddiction

JessicaDaniels

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Thisbookisaworkoffiction.Names,characters,places,events,andotherelementsportrayed

hereinareeithertheproductoftheauthor’simaginationorusedfictitiously.Anyresemblancetoreal

personsoreventsiscoincidental.

Nopartofthisbookmaybereproduced,storiedinaretrievalsystem,ortransmittedinanyform,or

byanymeans,electronic,mechanical,photocopying,recording,orotherwise,withoutpriorpermissionof

theauthor.

CoverDesignbyStephanieMooney

Formylove.Myamazinghusbandwhoputsupwithmycraziness.

TableofContents

One

Two

Three

Four

Five

Six

Seven

Eight

Nine

Ten

Eleven

Twelve

Thirteen

Fourteen

Fifteen

Sixteen

Seventeen

Eighteen

Nineteen

Twenty

TwentyOne

TwentyTwo

TwentyThree

Epilogue

Acknowledgments

One

“Shit.Shit.Shit.Joey?Ineedyou!”I’mflusteredandrunninglateasusual,franticallytryingtozip

upmynewblackstraplessdressandfailingmiserably.“Damnit,Joey.”

Throwingmyhandsintheairinfrustration,Istepintomyfavoriteblackpumpsandrundownstairs

intothebakery,mybarebackcompletelyexposed.Joey,myassistantanddearfriend,isleaninghistall

perfectlytailoredsuitedframeagainstthedoorwayandwatchingmeamusingly.Awinningsmilespreads

acrosshisfaceandifIwasn’tsorightlyirritated,Iwouldhavestoppedtoappreciatejusthowhandsome

helooks.

“Whatthefuck?Canyouzipmeuppleasesowecango?Thecakeshouldhavebeendeliveredover

anhourago.”

Hepushesoffthewallandmovestowardsme,hisexpressionsoftening.“No,dear,it’salready

beendelivered.”

Mybackstraightensasthecoldmetalofthezipperslidesupmyspine.“What?Noithasn’t.”

“Yes,ithas.”Hishandsgripmyshouldersandspinme.“IdroppeditoffmyselfbecauseIknewyou

wouldbefreakingoutuptheregettingreadyandmakinguslate.”

“Really?”Iask,staringupathimunconvinced.

Henods.“Really,cupcake.”

Smilingandreachingup,Ikisshimquicklyonhisfreshlyshavenjaw.“You’rethebest,youknow

thatright?”

“Iknow.”HiseyesrundownmybodyandIfeelmycheeksheatup.“Youlookamazing,Dylan.

Seriously,”hewiggleshisbrowsatme,“iftitsdidanythingforme…”

Iholdupmyhandtostophim,butteasinglymoldmybreastsandplumpthemup.“Yeah?Theydo

lookfantasticrightnowdon’tthey?”Hesmilesdownatme;hisonedimplesuckedintightly.

“Youreadyforthis?”heasksashebrushesmyhairoffmyshoulder.“Wecanstillbackout.I’mall

forditchingthisshitandgoingbarhoppinginstead.”Hisbrowarchesashesearchesmyface,waitingfor

myresponse.

Iexhaleforcefullyandgrabhisarm,leadinghimtowardsthedoor.“No,wecan’tditch.Julswillbe

pissedifwedon’tshowup.Besides---,”wehaltatthedoorandIgriphismassiveshoulders,“---I

thoughtyouwantedtodobadthingswithmenwe’llneverseeagain?”SluttyweddingsexawaitsandIam

morethanreadytoexperienceit.

Hiseyesquicklylightupwithmischief.There’sthenaughtyJoeyIknowandlove.“Ohfuckyes.

Let’sdothis,cupcake.”

**

FayetteStreetisbuzzingwithpeople,allwanderinginandoutofshopsonthisbeautifulJuneday.I

lockupandspinaround,seeingJoeystompinghisfootirritatinglyinthedirectionofourtransportation.

“Seriously,Dylan?Dowehavetotakethevan?Thissuitiswaytooniceforthatthingandyou

knowwhatkindofcarsthoserichbitcheswillberollingupin.”Hemotionstohisoutfitwithasweeping

handasIwalktowardsthedriver’sside.

“I’msorry,butdoyouhaveanothersuggestion?Yourcarisintheshopandthisismyonlymodeof

transportationatthemoment.”Iopenthedoorandstepin,standingontheledgeandlookingovertheroof

athisscrunchedupface.“AndbenicetoSam.He’sbeenthroughalotlately.”

Heletsoutanexhaustedbreath.“IfIruinthisnicesuit…andpleaseexplaintomewhyyounamed

thisstupidthing.Whonamestheirdeliveryvan?”Iignorehislastcommentandstartitup,glaringathim

asheclimbsintowardoffanyfurtherinsults.

“Don’tmakemeputyouintheback,”IspatasIpullawayfromthecurbtowardsaneveningof

inevitableawkwardness.

**

“Holyshit.Thisplaceisfantastic!”JoeyshrieksasIpullontothedrivewayleadinguptoWhitmore

Mansion,followingalonglineofexpensivevehicles.Iwinceandrubthesteeringwheel,preparingSam

forthelookshewillundoubtedlyreceive.“OhforChrist’ssake.See.Ifuckingtoldyouwewouldstand

outlikeidiots.Doyourealizewe’resandwichedbetweenaMercedesandLamborghini.Afucking

Lamborghini.”Iswallowloudly.Joey’sright.Mydeliveryvanwhichisadornedwithswirlsofcupcakes

andicingsplashesonbothsidesiscompletelyoutofplacehere.I’mfairlycertainwewillbetheonly

non-luxuryvehicleintheparkinglot.MyringtonestartlesmeandIquicklypullitoutofmyclutch,hitting

thespeakerphonebutton.

“Hey,Juls.”

“Areyouhereyet?I’mdyingtointroduceyoutoIanandhisentourageofinsanelyhotfriends.HEY.

Whatareyoudoing?Youshouldberoundingupthegroomsmen.Jesus,doIhavetodoeverythingaround

here?”Igiggleatmybestfriendasweslowlyinchclosertotheparkingattendants.She’susuallyvery

calmandcollected,untilit’sclosetoshowtime.

“PleasefortheloveofChristtellmethatoneofIan’sridiculouslyhotfriendspreferscocktopussy.

IneedtogetlaidandIneededittohappenyesterday.”JoeyispracticallybouncinginhisseatasIchuckle

athim.Thereisnothinghelikesmorethanawildnostringsattachedhookup.Andweddingsofferedthe

bestsituationforsuchthing.Especiallyweddingswheretherewasfreebooze.

“Actually,hisfriendBillydidn’tonceglanceatmyboobswhenIwasleaningoverIansoyoumight

begoodtogothere,JoJo.”Withthatinformation,hepullshisvisordownandbeginsfixinghisalready

perfectlycoifedblondhair.

“We’reattheValetguysnowsowe’llberightup.”Ihitendandstopinfrontofthreeyoungboys

whoeyeupSamquestionablyandglancebetweenthethreeofthem,silentlyaskingwhowantedtodrive

it.Istepoutwithmypurseandwalktowardsthem.“Here,theclutchstickssodon’tbeafraidtoberough

withhim.”Tossingthekeystotheoneclosesttome,IloopmyarmthroughJoey’sandwatchasthetwo

boyswhodidn’thavetodriveSamsnickeredattheonewiththekeys.

“Itsmellslikecupcakesinhere.”MyheadfallsbackandIlaughatthevaletattendantwithJoeyas

wefollowthecrowdintothevenue.

Todescribethisplaceasbeautifulisanextremeunderstatement.Enteringthroughrusticdoors,the

floorplanopensuptoamassivefoyerwithdimlightinggivenoffbyTiffany-inspiredglasschandeliers.

Stainedglasswindowssurroundbothdoorsandantiquefurnishingsandartworkfilltheroom.Guestsare

makingtheirwaydownthehallwaywhichleadsintoanotherlargeroom,mostlikelywheretheceremony

willbetakingplace.Agrandstaircase,wideenoughfortenpeopletowalksidebysideleadsuptoa

secondlevelandasIinhale,thescentofoldwoodandcallaliliesfillmylungs.Damnit.Thiswedding

isgoingtobebeyondchic.

“Thereyouare.Holyshit,Dyl,youlookincredible.IsthatdressnewandwhencanIborrowit?”

Mybeautifulbestfriendisadornedinanavydresswithanempirewaist,herdarkchocolatebrownhair

pulledbackintoachicbun.“Justinisgoingtoshitabrickwhenheseesyou,”shewhispersagainstmy

earassheendsourhug.I’dpreferitifhejustdroppeddeadatthesightofme,butI’mnotthatlucky.

“Thanks.Youlookamazingasusual.How’sthebride?”Herfingersfluffmyblondwavesthatfall

pastmyshouldersandsheleansinandgivesJoeyakissoneachcheek.

“Annoying.Comeon,youbothneedtofindseatsandquickly.We’reabouttostart.”Shegraspsmy

handinhersandIpullJoeybehindmeaswewalkstraightbackandintotheroomlabeledTheGreat

Hall.

“Okay,whereareallthehotboysat?”Joeysearchestheroom,practicallybouncingonhisfeet.The

boyisonthehuntandhasapredictableonetrackedmind.

Ishakemyheadathim.“Couldyoupleasetryandkeepitinyourpantsduringtheceremony?You

aretechnicallymyplusoneandcanwaittogetallfreakywithsomeluckymanatthereception.”

“Imakenopromises,cupcake.”HesmoothshissuitandwiggleshisbrowsatmeasJulsextends

herhand,pointingtowardstheleftsideoftheroom.

“Seethemansittingfiverowsbackontheendwiththeponytail?”

Ilaughandhereyeswiden.“Ponytail?Youdidn’tsayIanhadaponytail?”

“Wellhedoes.AndheletsmetugitwhenI’mcoming.”

“HotDamn.Getit,Juls!”JoeybeginsfanninghisfaceandIknowIneedtodothesame.Mycheeks

suddenlyfeellikethey’reonfire.Although,Ishouldn’tbethatsurprisedatmybestfriend’scomment.

Betweenthethreeofus,weareallentirelytooobsessedwiththemaleappendage.

“Anyways---,”shecontinueswithatone,“---thethreeequallydeliciouslookingmennexttohim

areallhiscolleagues.AndBilly---”shemeetsJoey’sanxiouseyes,“---istheonenexttothetwoempty

seats.Youguysbetterhurryupandgrabthembeforesomeoneelsedoes.Ohshit.”Sheglancesdownat

herwatchandpushesusforwardintotheroom.“Sit.Hurry.”SheclicksawayonherheelsasIstaredown

thecenteraislewherethebridewillbewalkingdownanyminute.Shit.Ican’twalkdownthataisleto

myseat.Thathastobesomekindofweirdkarmatowalkwherethebrideofyourex-boyfriendisabout

towalk.Nothankyou.Idonotneedthatkindofbadluck.

“Comeon.”IgrabJoey’ssleeveandpullhimwithmetowardstheleftsideoftheroom,walking

quicklyuptherowsofchairsuntilwestopatthefifthrow.Ian,Mr.Ponytail,glancesupandsmilesatme.

Ooohhhheiscute.“Excuseme,”Isaysoftly.Istepbetweenhislonglegsandthechairinfrontofhim,

tryingtoquicklymakemywaytothetwoemptyseats.Thereisn’tmuchspacetowigglethroughandI

inwardlylaughatthethoughtofmysixfoottwomusclyassistantdoingthesameshimmyrightbehindme.

Thelightsstarttodim,indicatingthattheceremonyisabouttostartsoImovefaster,Joeypushingup

againstmyback.

“Ohshit.”MyheelslipsonthearmofasuitjacketthatishangingonthebackofachairandIfall

backwards,crashingstraightintothelapofthemansittingtwoseatsdownfromIan.Hishandsquickly

grabmywaistandIgaspatthecontact.Ohgreat.Goodjob,Dylan.Glancingdownslowly,Iseethe

sexiestpairofhandsI’veeverlaideyeson.They’rebig;hisfingerslongandtightlygrippingmyhips.

SlightlytannedskincontrastingbeautifullywithmyblackdressandIhearafewmuffledlaughscoming

frombehindandeithersideofme.MyeyesflickuptomeetJoey’swhoisgrinningwidely,glancing

behindmeamusinglyatwhoever’slapIamsittingin.Istandupquicklyandspin,gettingthefirstreal

lookatthemanmyassisnowacquaintedwith.“Ohshit.”Igasp,seeingasmallsmileformatthecorner

ofhisperfectmouth.OhGodIwantthatmouthonme.Fullandpinkwithapredominantslitrunning

downthemiddleofthebottomone.Histonguedartsoutandslowlylicksit.Whoa.

“Youalreadysaidthat,love.”Holyfuckingshitthatvoice.Areyoukiddingmewiththatvoice?

Lowandsweet,Icanalmosttasteit.MyeyesquicklyscantherestofhisfaceasJoeynudgesmeinthe

back,urgingmetomoveforward.Fuckhim.Hecanwaitasecondandallowmetomarvelatthis

spectacleinfrontofme.Hisbodyisfit,built,anddefinitelymakesgooduseofagymmembership.

Perfectlydisheveleddarkbrownhairthatisslightlygrownout,strikinggreeneyesthataregluedtomine

andastrongjaw.Jesus,isthisguyforreal?Hecouldbeafuckingmodelwiththeselooks.

“I…uh…I…sorry.”Swallowingloudlyaftermypoorattemptatasentence,Imovequicklyand

fallbackintothechairclosesttotheaisle,mychestheavingrapidlyinmydress.

“Whatthefuckwasthat?”Joeywhispersashesitsdownnexttome,blockingmyviewentirelyof

thehottestguyIhaveeverseeninperson.

“Idon’tknow.Ifell.”

“Youaresuchawhoreyoudidthatonpurpose.Christonacrackerhe’shot.”Joeyleansbackabit

andImeettheman’seyesbrieflybeforeIdropmyhead,mycheeksinstantlyflushing.“Didhegethard?Is

hehuge?Helookshuge.”

Icovermymouthafteraloudgaspescapes.“Jesus,youhavezerofilter.ThankGodwearen’tina

church.Hedoeslookhugethoughright?”Wegiggleandmakecrudegesturesateachotherasthewedding

partymusicbeginstoplay.

“Ibethe’sbiggerthanJustin,”heteasesandmyeyeswiden.

“Areyouserious?TheringbearerisprobablybiggerthanJustin.”

Hismouthfallsopen.“Ifuckingknewhehadalittledick.Youneveradmittedit.”

“Yup.”Iwigglemypinkyfingerathimandhecracks.“WeshouldhavegottenSaraadildoasher

weddinggift.She’sgonnaneedit.”

OhMyGod.

JoeymouthsasIglanceuptothefrontoftheroom.MyeyesinstantlyfallonJustin

whoisnowstandingnexttohisgroomsmen.Fuckinghellhelooksgood.Iwashopinghegotfat.

“Youokay?”JoeywhispersandInod,slowlyturninginmyseatsothatIcanseethebridesmaids

walkdowntheaisle.Theyareallwearingpeach-coloreddressesthatsweepalongthefloorwitheach

steptheytake.Ismileattheflowergirlasshesprinklespetalsalongthepathandsettlesupfrontwiththe

restoftheparty.Theroomisbeautiful,everythinginwhiteandcoral.Tallcrystalcylinderslineeachrow

ofchairsandsmalllitvotivecandlesfloatinthewatertheyheld.Callaliliesarespreadthroughoutthe

roominvases,ontables,andeachbridesmaidclutchesone.Withthechangeofthemusic,theguestsall

risetotheirfeetandturntheirheadstowardsthebackoftheroom.MyeyesmeetJuls’immediatelyasshe

standsbythedoor.

“Youokay?”shemouths.

“Whatever,”Ireply.Shestepsupandopensthedoubledoors,allowingSaratowalkthroughwith

herfather.

Ispendtherestoftheceremonystaringdownintomylapatmyfingers.Theyarefreshlypainteda

deepplumcolorandIsmileatthesightoffrostingthatissmudgedonmyleftringfingerknuckle.Popping

itintomymouthandsucking,ImoansoftlyatthesweettasteofsugarasJoeyweepslikeababynextto

me.Tomysurprise,I’mnotemotionalatall.Weddingsusuallyturnedmeintoablubberingidiotbut

today,atthisparticularwedding,I’memotionless.Iguessapartofmeshouldfeelabitsad.Notbecause

myex-boyfriendisgettingmarriedtosomeoneotherthanmyself,butbecauseIwastedtwoyearsofmy

lifeonarelationshipthatalmostbrokeme.Andseeinghimagainisareminderofallthattimewasted.An

annoyingreminder.WhythehelldidIevenstaywithhimforthatlong?Itdefinitelywasn’tbecauseof

thesex.SexwithJustinwasblandandboring.Heneveroncebroughtmetoorgasm.Notonce.Iwould

havetofinishmyselfoffafterherolledoutofbedandstalkedintothebathroom.Ofcourse,Ialwayslet

himbelievethathegotmeoff.Ihadtogivetheguysomething.Raisingmyhead,Iglareathisprofile.

You’rewelcome,dick.

“AndnowitiswithhonorthatIpresenttoyouforthefirsttimeever,Mr.andMrs.Banks.Youmay

nowkissthebride.”Everyonestandsupandcheersandofcourse,Ifollowsuit.Itwouldberudenotto

andI’mnotbittersowhatever,Icheer.JustinandSarasharealingeringkissandearnafewwhistlesfrom

theaudience.IfeelJoey’shandsqueezemineandIglanceupintohisbigblueeyes.

“Icannotwaittogodrinkmyweightinbooze,”Iwhispertohim.

Hebendsandpresseshislipstomyear.“AndIcan’twaittogetmyhandsdownthepantsofthis

playanexttome.Maybeplayalittlejustthetip.”

“Jesus.Youwould.”EveryoneiswatchingthebrideandgroomwalkdowntheaislebutI’mlostin

sillyconversationwithoneofmyclosestfriends.I’mgigglingsohardthattearsarestartingtofillmy

eyes.Andthesewillbetheonlytearsshedfrommetoday.

“ComeonDylan,youknowyouwanttoslipoffintoadarkcornerwithyourmysterymanwhose

lapyouaccidentlyfellinto.Maybedoalittlesomethingelseinthatlapofhis.”

Iraisemyeyebrowandleanback,seeingpiercinggreeneyesflicktomineinstantly.Asmallsmile

pullsatthecornerofhismouth.Sweetmother,heisgorgeous.Iquicklyleanforwardandtrytoplayitoff

butfailmiserablyasmywickedgrinsmearsacrossmyface.“HellyesIdo.Ifuckingloveweddings.”

Two

TheguestsfileoutofTheGreatHallandupthegrandstaircasetothesecondlevel.OnceJoeyandI

reachthetop,westandthereamomenttotakeinoursurroundings.Theentiresecondflooristhe

receptionhallandridiculouslydeckedoutincoralandcallalilies.

“Holyhell.Arethoseicesculptures?”

MyeyesfollowJoey’sgesturetowardstherightsideoftheroom.“Isn’tthatabitoverthetop?

Ooohhhthere’sthecake.”

“ToldyouIdeliveredit.Ifeelyoudoubtmycapabilitiesasyourtrustedassistant.”

Inudgehisshoulderaswewalktotheplacecardtable.“AndIfeelyoureallyloveSamandare

justafraidtoadmitit.”

Tiltinghisheadback,helaughsloudly.“Howbadasswoulditbeifwestarteddoingourdeliveries

outofaLamborghini.”

“Badassandextremelyimpractical.Maybewhenwemakeourfirstmillionwe’llsplurgeona

luxurydeliveryvehicle.”Igrabourplacecard.“Comeon,we’retabletwelve.”

Ididn’treallycarewhattablewewereat,justaslongasweweren’tindirectviewofthebridal

table.Justinstillhadn’tmadeeyecontactandIwashopingtokeepitthatway.Andwiththismanypeople

inattendance,avoidinghimshouldn’tbeaproblem.Roundtablescoverthreesidesofalargewooden

dancefloor,thebridaltableelevatedonaplatformandoverlookingtheguests.Thetablesaredrapedin

whitelinenwithcoralribbonsrunningalongtheedgesandbeautifulcallalilyfilledcenterpieces.TheDJ

isalreadyplayingmusicandafewpeoplearedancingwhileothersminglearoundthetables,talkingand

enjoyingthemselves.

“Thereyoutwoare.”Julscomesskitteringovertousinherdangerouslyhighheelsandgrabsonto

ourforearmsasweadmirethesculptures.“Howwasit?Behonest.”Icockmyheadtothesideand

scrunchupmynoseasJoeyrubsthebackofhisneck,seeminglyinpain.Julspanics,hereyesbugandher

fingersimmediatelyrubhertemple.

“Itwasbrilliant!”Iyellasreliefwashesoverher,followedbyasternI’mgoingtokickyourass

look.

“Asusual,youareonebadassbitch,Juls.IfIevergetmarried,you’llberunningthatshow.”Joey

rubsherbareshoulderandshewinksathim.

“Well,IonlyhaveafewminutestosparebeforeIhavetogetthebridalpartylineduptocomein

so---,”shestepsinbetweenusandloopsherarmsthroughours,“---let’sgointroduceyoutosome

hotties.”Ohshit.Ialmostforgotabouthotlapguy.Almost.

“OhmyGod,Julsyoumissedit,”Joeysaysthroughalaugh.

Ileanbackandhiss.“Shutup,Joey.”

“What?WhatdidImiss?”SheflicksherheadbackandforthbetweenthetwoofusasIstarehim

down.

Don’tyoudare.I’mstillyourbossandwillfireyourassrighthere.

Hemusthavereadmy

thoughtsbecauseheneverfinisheshissentence,ormaybeit’sbecausewearenowstandinginfrontofthe

hotChicagomancandyclub.Thefourofthemarestandingnearatableconversingamongstthemselves,

butallconversationcomestoahaltaswewalkup.Allofthem,andImeanallofthem,arewaytoo

attractivetoproperlyfunctionaround.Andnowitissuddenlyfeelingathousanddegreeshotterinthis

room.

“There’smygirl.”IanreacheshishandoutandJulsstepsintohim,placingaquickkissonhischeek

beforeshestepsback.IkeepmyeyesonIan;notwantingtodrifttothemanwhoseeyesIknewwereon

me.Icanfeelthemburningaholeintomyprofile.

“Boys,Iwouldliketointroducemyverybestfriend,Dylan.”Herhandgrabsmineandpullsme

forwardasIglanceupandrunmyeyesdowntherowofmen,stoppingontheoneclosesttome.Damn,

hekeepsgettingbetterlooking.“AndthisisJoey,thehottestgaymaninChicago.”

“Ohplease,Illinoisbitch.Let’snotdownplaymysexiness.”JoeystraightensouthistieasItrynot

tolaugh.Myassistanthasnomodesty.

JulsglancesdownatherTiffanywatchandhereyesgowide.“Crap.Ian,willyoufinishthe

introductions?Ineedtotakecareofsomeshit.”

“Surething,babe.Bequickthough.”Heholdsontoherhandtightly,makinghertugawayplayfully

beforehissmilelandsonme.

“Christ,you’resopussywhipped.”TheblondmanstandingnexttoIansayssoftly.Iglanceathim

quickly,smilingattheideaofIanbeingcompletelycaughtupinmybestfriend.Thetwoofthemstarted

datingafewmonthsagoandsheisalreadyheadoverheelsforhim.Duetoourbusyschedules,thisisour

firsttimeactuallymeetingandfromwhatIcantellbythewayhelooksather,heseemsjustasinfatuated.

Ianglaresattheblondwholaughsaroundhisdrinkbeforeheturnsbacktowardsme.“Dylan,it’s

nicetofinallymeetyou.”HeholdsouthishandtomewithagenuinesmileasIshakeit.Ianistalland

built,verymuscularwithnearlyjetblackhairthatisbarelylongenoughtopullintohispony.Hisbrown

eyesregardmekindly.

“Yeahyoutoo,Ian.I’veheardsuchlovelythingsfromJuls.”

HeshakesJoey’shandandexchangessomepleasantrieswhilemyeyesstraintonotlookattheman

standingdirectlytomyleft.“Andthesearemyworkassociatesandmates,Trent,Billy,andReese,”he

says,motioningdownthelineofmen.Reese.Ofcoursethat’shisname.Aguylookinglikethiswouldn’t

benamedsomethingnotsexylikeTedorJoe.IshakeTrentandBilly’shandsastheysayhowniceitisto

meetme.Trent,whomadethepussywhippedcomment,istheshortestofthegroupwithalmostwhite

blondhairthatcurlsattheends.AndBilly,whoonlyhaseyesforJoeyatthemoment,hassandyblond

hairthatiskeptsupershort,diamondstudearringsinbothears.IbeginbitingtheinsideofmycheekasI

turnmybodytowardsReese.

“Dylan,Ibelievewe’vemetbriefly.”HeextendshishandandIplacemineinhiswithout

hesitation,feelinghiscallusedfingersticklemyskin.Ihavetolookupintohisstare,eventhoughI’m

wearingoneofmytallestpairsofheels.He’sgotatorsothatstretchesonformiles,onethatI’dliketo

wrapmyselfaround.Hisperfectlytailoreddarkgraysuitframeshishardbodyalmostunfairlyandashe

smiles,thetiniestlittlelinesappearnexttohiseyes.Isigh.Hisattractivenessisabitunnerving.

“Yes,briefly.I’msosorryaboutthat.”Notreally.

Stillholdingmyhandheleansinabit,hisbreathwarmingmyface.“I’mnot.Let’sgogetadrink.”

Istumbleabitattheclosenessofhisfacetomine,butsomehowmanageaquicknodinagreement

tohisrequest.Finallydroppingmyhand,ImeetJoey’seyesandhewinksatmebeforeIturnandwalk

sidebysidewithReesetothebar.IwanttoreachoutandslipmyhandbackinhisbutIdon’t.Thatwould

beweird.Staystrong.Resisttheurge.

“WhatcanIgetyou?”theyoungbartenderasksandIrealizeafteralongsilentmomentthatReeseis

waitingformyorder,staringatmewithanamusedgrin.

“Oh,umm,jackandcokeplease.”

Handsomenexttomeraiseshiseyebrowsatmydrinkselection.“Nogirlydrinkforyou?”

Ishakemyheadandbrushmyhairbehindmyear.I’veneverbeenthetypeofgirlthatorders

martinisandfruitydrinksthatcosteightdollarsapiece.

“I’llhavethesame.”HisfingersstrumthecounterasItrynottostareathisprofile,whichisan

extremelydifficulttask.Themanistoobeautifulnottostareat.I’mhandedmydrinkandimmediately

takealargesip.“So,Idon’tthinkI’veevermetawomannamedDylanbefore.AndIdefinitelydon’t

thinkI’veeverhadaDylanfallintomylap.”HislipstouchhisglassandIstareabitlongerthanImean

toastheliquidslipsintohismouth.AndIamnowsuddenlyjealousofhisbeverage.

Ishiftonmyfeet,flickingmystarebackuptohiseyes.“Oh,um,myparentswereabitobsessed

withthesinger.TheyhadpickedthenameDylanbeforefindingoutthesexanddecidedthatnomatter

what,thatwasgoingtobethename.Andso,hereIam.”

Hesmiles.“Yes,hereyouare.Doyoulikeanyofhismusic?”

Ithinkforamomentbeforereplying.“IlikethatAmericanGirlsong.”

Smilingslightly,heleansagainstthebar,histallframetoweringovermineandthebartenders.

“That’sTomPetty,”hecorrectsme,hislipscurlingupinamusement.

“Oh,thenIhavenoideaifIlikeanyofhissongsornot.”Iwrapmylipsaroundthetinystrawand

hisjawtightens,asmalltwitchappearingatthesharpangleofit.Heclearshisthroatandrunsahand

throughhishair,makingitevenmoreofaperfectmess.Godevenhishairissexy.

“So,brideorgroom?”Iask,watchinghisconfusionturnintorealization.

Hesmilesbehindhisglass.“Bride,sortof.Idon’treallyknowSarabutI’veworkedwithher

father.Heinvitedthefourofus.”HishandmotionstowardsIanandTrentwhoaresittingtogetherattheir

table.IshakemyheadasIrealizethatBillyandJoeyarealreadymissing.PredictableJoey.We’vebeen

hereforawholefiveminutes.“You?”

Irollmyeyes.“Groom,unfortunately.”

Hestepscloser,brushinghissuitjacketagainstmybarearmandtiltinghisheaddowntowardsme.

“Really?Why,sweetDylan,doesitsoundlikeyoureallyknowthegroom?”

SweetDylan?

Ohmy.Iglanceupintohiseyes.“BecauseIreallyknowthegroom.He’smyex.”

Hiseyeswidenandheleansback.“Seriously?”

Inod.“Cheatingextobespecific.”

“Fuck.Thatsucks.Imean,isn’tthisawkwardforyou?Whyareyouevenhere?”

Ilaughslightlyandpointthroughthecrowdtowardsthedesserttablewithmyfreehand.“Doyou

seethatbeautifulfivetierdeliciouslyconstructedweddingcake?”Henodsandsearchesmyface.“Imade

that.That’swhyI’mhere.”

“Noshit?So,you’reabaker?”IproudlysmileastheDJsoftensthemusic.

“Andnow,ladiesandgentlemen,Iaskeveryonetodirecttheirattentiontothefrontentrance.The

partyhasarrived!”Thecrowdcheersandwhistlesaseachbridesmaidandpairedgroomsmenlineupat

thedoor.Ifeelapairoflipsbrushagainstmyearandfreeze,mypulseinstantlyracing.

“Youinterestedinwatchingthis?”HisfaceisdangerouslyclosetomineandIalmoststumbleathis

scentthatisnowfillingmylungs.HesmellslikecitrusandIhaveasuddenurgetoburymyfaceintohis

neckandinhalehimdeeply.

“Notreally,”Isoftlyreply,glancingupintothisgreenstare.Noddingonce,hegripsmyelbowand

pullsmethroughthecrowd,stoppinginfrontofthedesserttable.

“So,whatdowehavehere?”Hetiltshisglassandtakesasipaswebothadmiremywork.Ismile

andbeamatmycreation.Itreallydoeslookfabulous.

“Well,thecakeitselfisanorangespongecakewithGrandMarnierwhippedcreamandmarmalade

filling---,”Igesturetowardsthepeachcoloredpearlsandcallaliliescascadingdowntheside,“---and

thelittledotsandliliesaremadeofsugarsoit’salledible.”

Leaningforward,headmirestheflowerswithafurrowedbrow,studyingitclosely.Igreatly

appreciatehisinterestconsideringtheywereabitchtomakeandcan’thelpbutgigglequietlyathislook

ofdeepthought.I’veneverevenseenagroomreactthiscuriouslytoacakeImade.

“Wow.Ithoughttheflowerswerereal.Youcanreallyeatthose?”

Ismileproudly.“Hmmmmm.Theyareinsanelysweetandpracticallydissolveonyourtongueonce

theheatofyourmouthtouchesthesugar.”

Heraisesaneyebrowatmeashestraightensup.“Christ.Youmakethatsoundsodirty,”hesays

withalowraspyvoice.IshrugasiftosilentlyportraythatIalwaysmadethingssounddirtywhichseems

ridiculouseveninmyhead.Nobigdeal,justhowItalk.

“Sowhatdoyoudo,Reese?”Itakeageneroussipofmydrinkandwatchhiseyesgotomymouth,

myteethclampingdownonmystraw.

Afteramoment’shesitationashiseyeslinger,hereplies,“I’maCPAwithWalkerandAssociates.”

Nearlychokingathisadmission,Iclearmythroatashiseyeswiden.“Getthehelloutofhere.

You’reanaccountant?You?”Hemustbejoking.Beautifulandhighlyintelligent?IfeellikeI’vefound

aunicorn.

Hesimplynodsandstudiesmyfacewithasmallgrin.“Doesthatsurpriseyou?”

“Yes.Theguythatdoesmytaxeshaspsoriasisandlooksmorelikemyfather.There’snoway

someoneashotasyouisanaccountant.”Jesus,Dylan.Iclosemyeyesandshakemyhead,hearinga

smallchucklefromhisdirection.WhenIopenthemfinally,Ilockontohiscuriousstare,hislipsslightly

partedasifhe’sabouttospeak.TheDJcomesoverthespeakersystemandhaltshim.

“Andnowit’stimeforthebrideandgroom’sfirstdance.”

IturnmybodytowardsthedancefloorthathassuddenlyopeneduptoallowJustinandSaraintothe

center.SaralooksbeautifulinherstraplessgownwithintricatebeadingandJustinlooksdecentinhis

suit.Okay,maybealittlebetterthandecentbutthatdoesn’tsaymuch.I’vealwaysthoughtthatallmen

lookbetterinasuit,nomatterwhattheylookedlikebeforetheysteppedintoit.Afamiliarsongsoftly

playsoverheadandIcringe.

“JesusChrist.Youhavegottobekiddingme.”Idownmydrinkandplaceitonthedesserttableas

Reesestepsclosertome.

“Doyounotlikethissong?”heasks.EveryoneiswatchingthecoupleadoringlyandI’mstaringat

JustinlikeIwanttopunchhiminthethroat.Whatatool.

“No,Ilovethissong.IloveditsomuchthatImadeitoursongtwoyearsago.”Ilaugh.“Ofcourse

Ishouldn’tbesurprisedthatJustinfailedtobeoriginalhere.Hewasneveroneforchangeororiginality,

especiallywhenitcametooursexlife.”MyeyesflicktoReesewhoisnowsuckingonapieceofice.He

bitesithardandletsitslidedownhisthroatasheleansdown,hisnosebrushingagainstmytemple.I

freeze.

“Really?Tellme.”Iswallowloudlyandclosemyeyes,wantingtoblockouteverythingaroundme

thatisn’thiminthismoment.It’sonlyhisbreathonmyface,hisscent,andtheslightestcontactofhisskin

againstmine.“Didthetwoofyoueversneakoffataweddingandfuckeachother’sbrainsout?”

Holyhell.

Didhejustsaythat?Myeyesshootopenandmymouthdrops.CanIhonestlyrespond

tothat?WouldhelikeitifItoldhimexactlywhatIwantedtosay,thatIonlywantedhimtofuckmy

brainsoutatthisweddingoranyweddingforthatmatter?Ishiftonmyfeetandsearchmyheadforthe

appropriatewordingwhenJoeyappearsatmyside,outofbreath.

“Cupcake,Ineedamoment.”Hegrabsmyhand,smilingflirtatiouslyatReeseandpullsmetowards

ourtable,plantingmefirmlyinachair.

Iglareathim.“Thisbetterbeanemergencyformetoallowyoutopullmeawayfromthat

conversation.HejustbasicallyinsinuatedthathewantedtofuckmeintotomorrowandI’dverymuchlike

that.”MyeyesflickbacktoReesewhoistalkingtooneofthebridesmaidsnow,herhandsplayfully

pushingathischestashespeaks.Ohplease,youlooksodesperate.

Joeystraightenshistieandpullshisjacketoff,slippingitonthebackofhischair.“Goodlord,he’s

direct.Butbacktotheimportantmatterathand,Billyjustgavemethebestblowjobofmylife.”

Myeyesnarrowathisbeamingfaceandheshrinksabitinhischair.“Seriously,Joey?That’swhat

youhadtopullmeawayfromReesefor?Youcouldn’thavewaiteduntilafterIhadanorgasmtotellme

this?”Ileanforwardandhiseyeswiden.“Andforshit’ssake,whatguyhasn’tblownyouthatyouaren’t

quicklytryingtogivethetitleofbestmouthinChicagoto?”

“That’snotallIneededtotellyou.”Hemovesinclosertome,hishandbrushingmyhairbackto

revealmyear.“Onourwaytooursecludedhookupspot,Isawthebridewithherlipswrappedaround

thebestman’sdick.”

“WHAT?”IclaspmyhandquicklyovermymouthasIfeelhundredsofeyesonme.“Areyou

fuckingserious?”Imanageinamuchmoreappropriatetone.HenodsjustasJulsstormsuptoourtable.

“Youtwobitchesaresofuckingloud.What’sgoingon?”

“Nothing,”JoeyandIsayinunison.

Iwasn’tsureweshouldmakeJulsawareofthesituationjustyet.I’dlethergetpaidfirst,andthen

dropthatjuicybombinherlap.She’dwanttorubitinJustin’sfacethathegotwhatwascomingtohim

andthatmightresultinacanceledweddingreceptionandalossofhercommission.

Ibrushmyhairoffmyshoulderandsmilesweetlyather.“Areyoudonewithyourwedding

planningdutiesnow?”Iask,wantingtochangethesubject.

“Yes,finally.”Sherollshereyes.“Thatfuckingweddingpartywasadisaster.I’mprettysurethey

wereallinsomegiantorgybacktherebeforetheywalkedintothereception.”ImeetJoey’seyesandwe

bothtrytokeepastraightface.ThemusicpicksupandJulsjumpsonherheels,reachingoutforour

hands.“OoohhhIlovethissong!Comeon.Let’sgoshowtheserichsnobshowweshakeitindowntown

Chicago.”

“Youknowitgirl,”JoeysaysasIshufflequicklybehindthem.

ShemakesaquickstopatIan’stableandmyeyeslockontoReesewhogivesmeaplayfulsmile

behindhisdrink.Theotherboysaretalkingamongstthemselves.“Wannadance,babe?”Julsasksbefore

Iangrabsherandpullsherintohislap,kissingherpassionatelyinfrontofeveryone.Ican’thelpbutblush

andglancequicklyatReesewhonoticesandwinksatme.Myheartbeatsroughlyinmychestatthe

gesture.Relax,itwasjustawink.

“JesusChrist.Getafuckingroom,”Joeyspats,pullingmeinthedirectionofthedancefloor.

“Wait.”Ipullmyhandoutofhisandquicklywalkaroundthetable.IstopinfrontofReeseandlean

down,pressingmylipstohisearasheliftshisfacetomine.Hisfingerscurlaroundmyarmandthe

contactmakesmemomentarilydizzy.“Keepyoureyesonme,”Isayandhesucksinabreath.Oureyes

arelockedandourfacesinchesapart.

“HowcouldInot?”herepliessoftly.IstraightenandseethelingeringintensityinhisstareasJoey

reclaimsmyhandandpullsmeoutontothefloorwhichisnowpackedwithguests.

Beyoncé’s“NaughtyGirl”isbumpingthroughthespeakers,thebassvibratingthroughmybodyasI

begintomove.JoeyandJulsdancenexttome,thethreeofustryingtooutdancetheother.Myhands

moveupmybody,brushingovermystomach,upmychestandupandaroundmyneckasIclosemyeyes

andletthemusictakeover.Ilovetodance,especiallywithmybestfriends.Myhandsrunthroughmy

wavyhairandIfeelthehemofmydressriseabit,brushingthemiddleofmybarethighs.“Gogirl!”Joey

squawksandmyeyesflashopentoseehimspinningandtwirlingaroundme,asonlyJoeycando.Fora

mansotallandmuscular,hecanmovehisbodyasifhewasprofessionallytrained.Iswaymyhipsand

moveinthemostoverlyflirtatiouswaypossible,hopingandprayingthatReeseiswatchingmebutnot

havingtheballstoglanceoverandknowforsure.IsquealwithJulsasRihanna’s“S&M”comeson

overhead.ApairofstronghandswraparoundmytinywaistfrombehindmeandIstill,feelinghotbreath

inmyhair.

“Don’tstop,Dylan.”Reese’svoicesendsachillupmyspineandgoosebumpsalongmyexposed

skin.Hishipsmoveagainstmybackashepullsmeagainsthim,hishandsslippingaroundmystomach.

Juls’eyeswidenandshegoestoreachformewhenIanappearsbyhersideandgrabsherhand,spinning

herintohimanddippingherforakiss.Iclosemyeyesandfeelhishandsmoveupmyribcage,his

thumbsbrushingalongthebottomofmybreastsasIrubmyassagainsthislap.Ihaven’tdancedlikethis

withaguyinyears,infact,Idon’tknowifI’veeverenjoyeditthismuchbefore.Mypulseishammering

inmythroatandIcanfeelmyfaceheatupfromthecontact.We’removingtogetherinperfectrhythmasI

reachupandaroundhisneck,feelinghisbreathonmybareshoulder.Hishandsspinmeandmychest

pressesagainsthis.

“Thisdressiskillingme,”hesays,brushingmyhairoutofmyfaceandtuckingitbehindmyear.We

continuetomoveagainsteachother,hisimpressiveerectiondiggingintomystomachandmyhands

grippingtightlyaroundhisneckwhileheholdsontomyhips.Ourlipsaresoclose;openasourragged

breathingbrusheseachother’sface,sharingthesameair.Ifeitherofusweretomoveinslightly,we

wouldbekissing.

“Wereyouwatchingme?”

“Depends.Wereyoudancingjustforme?”Ilickmylipsandnod,hiseyeswideningbeforehe

dropshishandsfrommywaistandgrabsmyhand,pullingmeawayfromthedancefloor.Holyshit.This

isit.I’mactuallygoingtohavesluttyweddingsexwiththehottestguyontheplanet.Iinwardlyhigh-

fivemyselfaswemovequicklybetweentheguests.

Ifollowcloselybehindhim,myheelspreventingthefasterwalkingthatIwouldhavepreferredas

wemovedownthestaircaseanddownthehallwaythatleadstothebathrooms.Mychestisrisingand

fallingrapidlyandmynervousenergyhaskickedin,causingmetopracticallybounceonmyfeet.He

pushesthemen’sroomdooropenanddropsmyhand.

“Waithere.”Disappearingbehindthedoor,Istandoutsidethemen’sroomandpraytoGodthatno

onewasinthere.I’msowounduprightnow,Ican’timaginewhatwouldhappenifwedidn’tfollow

throughwiththis.I’veneverfeltthisturnedoninmylife.

Ilickmydrylipsasheopensthedoorandsmiles.“Youdon’tmindabitofanaudiencedoyou?”

MyeyeswidenandIswallowloudly,seeingasmallsmirkformonhislips.“Ihopeyou’rejoking.”

I’mnothavingsexinfrontofpeople.Nofuckingway.

“Iam.Comeon.”HegrabsmyhandbutIstayfirmlyplantedinthedoorway.

“Youdon’thaveagirlfriend,doyou?Becauseifwe’reabouttodowhatIthinkwe’reabouttodo,

it’snothappeningifyouhaveone.”

Heraiseshiseyebrowsatme,seeminglyunpreparedforthatjustifiedquestion.“No,nogirlfriend.I

haven’thadoneofthosesincecollege.”Hetugsmeagainsthischest.“AnymorequestionsbeforeI

ravageyou?”

Ishakemyheadslowlywithaflirtatioussmile.

“Good.”Hepullsmeintothebathroomandlocksthedoorbehindusbeforehepushesmeupagainst

it.Hishandsgrabmyfaceashislipssoftlybrushagainstmine,tastingandteasingme.Mybottomlipis

pulledintohismouthandImoan,grantinghimfullaccessasIpartmylipsandhistonguesweepsinside.

“Fuck,Dylan.”Hemoveshistongueagainstmine,bitingandlickingmylips.Holyhellthisguycan

kiss.HismouthexpertlyexploresmineforwhatseemslikehoursandIslowlyfeelapullbuildinginmy

core.ThiskissactuallymakesmefeelbadforalloftheotherkissesImaygetfromguysinthefuture.The

barisbeingsetridiculouslyhighhere,certainlyunattainablebythemajorityofthemalerace.Myhands

rakethroughhishair,holdinghisheadtomineasmybodyrespondstohistouchwithmoansand

whimpers.There’snocontrollingmyselfhere,I’mcompletelyabandoningallmyreservationsandgiving

intoeverythingI’mfeeling.I’msuddenlypickedup,mylegswrappingaroundhiswaistashecarriesme

overtothevanity,ourmouthsstillworkingeachother’s.HetasteslikespearmintandliquorasIlickhim

offmylipswhilehismouthmovesdownmyneck.

“Youtastesosweet.Ibeteverypartofyoutasteslikethis.”Igroanathiswordsashislipsbrush

againsttheswellsofmybreaststhatarepokingoutfrommydress,myhandstanglinginhismessofhair.

Hislipsmovealongeachcollarboneandovereachshoulder,tastingandnibblingeveryinchofexposed

skin.

“Reese.”

Hishandshikeupmydressandtrailuptheinsidesofmythighs.Hisfingersslidealongthelength

ofmypantiesandhiseyesmeetmine.They’rethegreenesteyesI’veeverseen,noothercolormixedin.

It’salmosthypnotizingstaringintothem.Deeppoolsofemerald.Mypantiesarequicklysliddownmy

legs,myeyeswideningashetucksthemintohispantspocket.Shit,that’shot.Myfingersworkfrantically

athissuitjacket,promptinghimtoslipitoffandplaceitnexttous.I’mpracticallyclawingathisdress

shirt,fumblingwiththebuttonswithmyshakyhands.Ineedtoseehimbareinfrontofme.Iwanttosee

hismusclescontractashemovesinsideofmeandbythewayhisshirtstretchesacrosshischest,Iknow

withoutadoubtthathe’llbeunbelievabletolookat.

“Thishastobequick,love.Idon’tthinkwehavetimetogetcompletelynakedbeforesomeonetries

tocomeinhere.”HepresseshisforeheadagainstmineandIgrowlashebringshismouthbacktomine.

TwofingersslipinsideofmeandIcryout.

“OhGod.”

“You’resowetandreallyfuckingtight.”Hislipsmovealongmyjaw.I’mpantingagainsthim,

archingintohistouch.“Doesthatfeelgood,love?”

“Yes.Please,Ineedyou,”Ibegashisfreehandpullsacondomoutofhisbackpocket.

Hehandsittome.“Hurry.”

Iholdthewrapperwithmyteethandmyfranticfingersworkhisbuttonandzipper,mylegshelping

toslidehispantsandboxersdowntohismid-thigh.MyeyeswidenathislengthandIgroanloudlyashe

worksmewithhisfingers,histhumbcirclingmyclit.“AmIdistractingyou?”Hislipsmoveagainstmy

neckandIcanonlynodandmoanmyresponse.Iswallowagainsthismouthandfeelthemcurluponmy

skin.I’mgettingclosealreadybutIwanthiminme,Ineedhiminme.Goingwithoutsexforayearhas

beenworthitifitleadstoithappeningwithReese.

Regainingmyfocus,Iripthewrapperwithmyteethandslidethecondomdownhislengthwhilehe

stillsinmyhand,hisheavybreathingmixedwithminefillingtheroom.Istarefascinatedbyhowmuchit

hastostretchtoformaroundhimandtrailmyfingersunderneath,hearinghiminhalesharply.He’slong

andheavy,myfingertipsbarelytouchingasIgriphim.Themanisgifted.Crazygifted.Willheevenfitin

me?Mymindscramblesatthethought.Wellwouldn’tthatbeanicefuckyoufromkarma.Here,Dylan,

feastyoureyesonthismagnificentpenisthatyoucan’tevenhandle.

Pullingouthisfingers,hewipesalineofmyarousalonthetopofmybreastsandimmediatelylicks

ifoffasIliftintohim.“Youtastefuckingamazing.”Heleansbackandlockseyeswithme,lickinghis

lips.“Ineedtobeinyou.Ican’twaitanymore.”Hishandswrapmythighsaroundhiswaistasheenters

meinonedeeppush,aloudgroanescapingbothourmouths.

“Reese!”HisthrustsaredeepandquickasIholdontohisneckwithonehandandtheedgeofthe

vanitywiththeother,myknucklesstarkwhite.Oureyesareoneachother’sasheslowshismovements,

guidinghislengthalmostcompletelyoutofmebeforeheramsitbackin.

“Dylan,holyshit.”Hecontinuestheslowtortureasabeadofsweatdripsfromhishairlinedownto

hisjaw.Dartinghistongueout,helickshisbottomlipbeforepullingitintohismouth,bitingonitasI

staremesmerized.

Rockingmyhipsintohisthrusts,IfeelhimdeeperthanIhadeverfeltanythinginmylife.Hisgreen

eyesareburningintomine,fullofintensityanddesire.Hiswordstomeechoinmyearsashetriesto

controlourquicklyclimbingorgasms.“Sogood.Sofuckinggood,Dylan.Letmehearyou.Screamfor

me.”Noguyhasevertalkedtomeduringsexandit’sprobablythehottestthingI’veeverheard.His

fingersdigintomyhipsandIthinkhemightbruiseme,butatthemoment,Idon’tcare.Theslightpain

he’sinflictingonmeisactuallyfuelingmyneedforhim.

“I’mclose.Comewithme,”Igrunt,seeinghiseyeslightup.Slidinghishandbetweenusandunder

mydress,histhumbpressesagainstmyclitandbeginstomove,bringingmyclimaxtothesurface.My

nailsdigintohisneckasIthrowmyheadbackanderupt.“Reese.OhGod.”

HisfreehandgripsmyneckandpullsmeintohisthruststhatarenowsopowerfulIthinkImight

splitintwo.“Fuck!”hecriesout.Ireachupandpullhishairashecomes,hiseyesneverleavingmine

andmynameescapinghislipsathisrelease.Ithoughtthatmostguysclosedtheireyeswhenthey

climaxed,butnotthisone.Andsomethingabouthimwatchingme,lettingmeseehimcompletelyunravel

makesthisevenhottersomehow.Hestillsinsidemeandpullsmyfacetowardshim,bringingourlips

together.Hiskissesaresoftandsweet,goingfromonecornerofmymouthtotheother.Mylipsare

swollenandchappedandIcouldn’tcareintheleast.I’dkissthisguyuntilmylipsactuallyfelloff.

“Whatthefuckwasthat?”heasks,myeyesflickeringopenandsearchinghisface.Amazing.Mind

blowing.BeyondanythingIcouldhaveimagined.Iwanttosaythesethingsbutdon’t,notreally

understandingwhyhewouldaskmethatquestionorwhatthehellhemeansbyit.

Heshutshiseyesandpullsoutofme,tossingtheusedcondombeforehepullshispantsupand

tuckshimselfbackin.Turninghisbodytowardsme,hepicksuphissuitjacketandslipsitacrosshis

broadshoulders,hisfacecompletelyimpassive.Ah.Theawkwardaftermathofsexwithastranger.I

avoidhiseyesasIhopdownandturntofixmydressinthemirror,realizingthathestillhasmypantiesin

hispocket.Fuck,ishegoingtogivethemback?Ordoesheexpectmetoaskhimforthem?Imeethis

eyesbrieflyinthemirror,breakingthecontactalmostimmediatelyatthesightofhistightjawandcreased

brow.Fuckthat.I’mnotaskinghimanything.

Thedoorrattles.“Shit.”Hisvoiceisclippedandirritatedasheglancesatmebeforeturning

towardsthedoor.“I’mreallysorry,”hesaysashisfingersslidethelockbackandheopensit,allowing

twomentoenterasIstandatthesink.

“Well,well,well.Whathavewehere?”

Ishakemyheadandpushpastthem,myshoulderbrushingagainstReeseasIwalkdownthe

hallwayandquicklyupthestairs,leavinghimintherestroom.JesusChristwhatwashisproblem?What

thefuckwashesorryfor?Hecamedidn’the?I’mfuming,myhandsclenchedtightlyatmysideasI

stormthroughthecrowd.Imakemywaytomytablewheremytwofriendssit,pickingatthefoodontheir

plates.TheireyesbothlockontomyfaceandJoeygrinswidewhileJulsstudiesmequestionably.

“Ineedtogetoutofhere,”Isay,grabbingmyclutchthatIhadleftonthetableandtryingmybestto

avoidtheirstares.

“Andwherethehellhaveyoubeen?”Joeyasks,pushinghisplateawayasJulsstandsupandwalks

overtowardsme.“Pleasetellmeyoujustgotthoroughlyfucked.”

“Yes,Dylan,wherewereyou?Youmissedthecakecutting.”Goddamnit.That’stheonlythingI

reallywantedtosee.

“Don’task.”IglancetomyrightandspotReeseashewalkstowardshistable,hiseyesmeeting

minebrieflybeforeflickingaway.Helooksthoroughlyfuckedaswell,hishairasexydisheveledmess.

“OhChrist.Pleasetellmeyoudidn’tdowhatIthinkyoudidwithhim?”IbenddownandkissJoey

quicklyonthecheek,ignoringJulsquestioning.

“Areyoucomingwithme?”Iask.

“Nah,I’mgoingtospendsomemorealonetimewithBilly.”Hepullsmeclosertohim.“Iwant

everyfuckingdetailtomorrow.”IrollmyeyesathimbeforeIturnandwalkoutofthereceptionareawith

Juls.

Imakeitdownthestairsandtothefrontdoorbeforeshestopsmeanddemandsanswers.“Well?”

“Wellwhat?Iforgotyourquestion.”Ididn’t.

Shecrossesherarmsoverherchestandglaresatme.“DidyoufuckReese?Dylan,pleasetellme

youdidn’t.”

“Technically,hefuckedmeandthoroughlyfreakedoutafterwards.CanIgonowplease?”

Hermouthdropsopen.“Fuckingmotherfucker.Dylanhe’smarried.”

Ihavetogripthewalltopreventmyselffromfallingover.“What?Buthesaidhedidn’thavea

girlfriend.”Mymouthdropsopen.“Oh,thatasshole.Ibetherthoughthewasreallyclever,tellingmehe

hasn’thadagirlfriendsincecollege.Isupposeawifeisn’ttechnicallyagirlfriend.”Thetightsensationin

mygutfrommypreviousorgasmisnowinstantlyreplacedwithnauseaandanintenseurgetopunch

Reeseinthenuts.“Howdoyouknowhe’smarried?”

Julsrunsherhandsdownherface.“IantoldmehewasmarriedwhenImetallofthembrieflyfor

drinkslastweek.Wow.Whatascumbag.”Indeed.Scumbagdoesn’tevencomeclosetodescribehimat

themoment.I’mthinkingdouche-bag,tool,asshole,fuckingprick.

Pinchingthetopofmynosewithmythumbandpointerfinger,IquicklyreplaythehottestsexI’ve

everhadoverinmyhead.Idropmyhandandclenchmyfist.Icouldkillhim.“Andnofuckingwonderhe

couldn’tgetawayfrommequickenoughafterwards.HowthehellwasIsupposedtoknowhewas

married?Hewasn’twearingaring.”

“Dylan?”WebothturnourattentiontoJustinwhoisstandingatthebottomofthesteps,eyewide

andfullofshockashelooksatme.Wellthisnightjustkeepsgettingbetter.

Isnapmyeyesbacktomybestfriend,ignoringthecheatingloseronthestairs.“I’mleavingbeforeI

getarrestedforhomicide.I’llcallyoutomorrow,”IsaytoJulsandJulsalone.

Iopenthedoorandwalkouttothevaletattendants,remindingthemthatIamtheownerofthe

deliveryvanastheylaughamongstthemselves.I’mfumingandsonotinthemoodforthisshit.“You’re

workingafuckingweddingsoIknowyou’renotridingaroundinLexus’.Justgogetmyfuckingvan,”I

snapatthemandtheyimmediatelyshutup.Onescurriesawayquicklytowardstheparkinglot.

“Dylan,canItalktoyou?”Justin’svoicecomesfrombehindme.

“No.CongratulationsJustin.Theceremonywaslovely.”IfeelhishandonmyshoulderandIturn

quickly,steppingoutofhisgrasp.

“Don’ttouchme.Shouldn’tyoubeupstairswithyourwife?”

Hesnickersandstepscloser,hisgrayeyesfullofmischief.“WellifIheardcorrectly,aren’t

marriedmenyourthingnow?”Ohno,hedidnotjustsaythat.Myhandcomeshardandfast,slapping

himacrosshisfaceashestumblesback,wide-eyedandsmiling.

“Fuckyou,”Ispat,seeingSampulluptothecurbandwalkingquicklytothedriver’sside.Ican’t

pullawayfastenough;tiresspinningasIquicklymakemywaydownthelongdrivewayandawayfrom

mycompletefuckupofanight.Ishouldhavenevercometothisstupidthing.Hookingupwithamarried

manattheweddingofmyex-boyfriend.JesusKarma.Youareonehatefulbitch.

Three

Sundaywasacompleteblur.IspenttheentiredayinbedunlessIhadtousethebathroomorget

somethingfromthekitchen.AfterseveralmissedcallsandtextsfromJoey,Ifinallyturnedmyphoneoff

andkeptitthatwaytherestoftheday.JulsprobablymadehimawareofReesebeingmarried,but

whereasshewasintolecturingmeaboutthetopic,Joeywouldhigh-fiveme,insistingItellhimevery

juicydetailaboutthehookup.AndIwasn’tinthemoodforeither.Ididn’twanttothinkaboutthebest

orgasmI’deverhad.Ididn’twanttothinkaboutthewayhislipsfeltagainstmine,againstmyskin,the

tasteofhismouth,hissmell,thewayhisfacelookedwhenhecame,thesoundofmynameonhislips,the

wayhelookedatmeashefuckedmeagainstthesink,orhowridiculouslyhugehewas.Becausehewas

married.Hewasfuckingmarriedandacompletetoolforhookingupwithmebehindhiswife’sback.I

can’tevenhaveaonenightstandwithoutitblowingupinmyface.Andthentherewasmyjerkoffofan

ex-boyfriend.Followingmeoutsideandputtinghishandsonmelikethatwhenheshouldhavebeenglued

tohisnewwife’sside.Talkaboutascumbag.Ofcourse,hedidgetcheatedonathisownweddingwhich

couldnotdelightmemore.Thatbastardgoteverythinghedeservedandwhateverelseiscomingtohim.I

hopehedoesn’tfindoutabouthiswife’sindiscretionsforawhileandthinkshe’sinalovingmarriage

wheninrealitysheisoutfuckinganythingthatmoves.

**

Myalarmannoyinglywakesmeat5:00a.m.onMondayasusual.Iliketogetarunineverymorning

beforeIopenuptheshop,mainlybecauseofthelargeamountofsugarconsumptionthathappensregularly

betweenJoeyandmeduringworkhours.Dressinginmyrunninggear,Igrabmyphoneandkeysoffmy

nightstandandgodownstairsintothelargekitchen.IliveinasmallloftabovethebakeryandhavesinceI

openedtheplacethreeyearsago.It’spracticalformelivingatmyjobsincesomedaysI’mrequiredto

getupinthemiddleofthenighttoworkonsomethingforaclient.Myloftconsistsofonelargeroomthat

Iseparatedintotwowithadecorativescreen,givingmybedroomareasomeprivacyfromthelivingroom

andkitchen.Itissmall,quaint,andcheap.Rentingtheroomabovethebakeryonlycostsme$850amonth

whichisrelativelyinexpensiveforthedowntownChicagoarea.Belowtheloft,thestairsdumpoutinto

thelargekitchen/workspacethatIspendthemajorityofmytimein,withadoorwaythatleadsouttothe

mainbakery.ImakemywaythroughthatdoorwayandsmileatJoey’sfacethatispressingagainstthe

glass,peeringinside.Henevermissesarun.Istepoutsideandlockupbehindme,seeinghisangry

expressionglaringatmeasIspintogreethim.

“Well,thankGodyouaren’tdead.Whatthefuck?Icalledyouamilliontimesyesterday.”He

stretcheshisbackbytwistingfromlefttoright.“IbelieveItoldyouthatIwanteddetails.”

Ibenddownandreachformytoesandhedoesthesame.“I’msorry.Ineededtomentallycheckout

yesterday.Theweddingwasabitmuch.”Understatementofthecentury.Stretchingmyhamstrings,I

standupandpressmyhandagainstthewindowofthebakerytosteadymyself.

“Andareyougoingtojuststandthereandnottellmewhatthefuckthatmeans?”

“I’msureyoualreadyknoweverything,yougossipqueen.Hasn’tJulsspilledthebigsurprise?”

Westartjoggingdownthesidewalktogether,ourfeethittingthepavementatthesametime.It’s

alreadyhotashelloutsideandthatjustupsmyannoyancelevel.

“Whatbigsurprise?JulsspenttherestofthereceptionsuckingIan’sfaceandGodknowswhatelse

andIatemyweightincakeafterIsawBillyflirtingwithawaiter.”

“Ohshit.I’msorry,Joey.Thatreallysucks.”

“Whatever.HeendedupdrivingmehomeandIdidhiminthebackofhisDenaliaspunishment.”

Ipushhisarmbuthedoesn’tbudge.Themanisamountainofmuscle.“Jesus.WellIguessyou

showedhim.”

“OhIdid.Now,whatsurprise?”WemakeourusualtrekdownFayetteStreetonthedeserted

sidewalk,Joeyinitiatingthepaceashealwaysdoes.

“Reeseismarried.”Goditstillsuckedtodaysayingitoutloud.Andwhydidmyheartphysically

acheatthesoundofit.Icouldn’tbethataffectedbyaweddinghookup,nomatterhowgoodthesex

was.IstoprunningandlookbackatJoeywhoisfrozenonthepavement,hisblondcurlsalreadysticking

tohisforeheadwithsweat.

“He’swhat?”Hestartsupagain,momentarilystunnedandImovewithhim.

“Youheardme.Fuckingmarried.Ofcourse,hedidn’tmentionthisbefore,during,orafterourhot

ashellsexinthemen’sbathroom.Hejustsimplyaskedme‘whatthefuckwasthat’afterhecame,toldme

hewassorry,andwentonabouthisbusiness.”Ipushmylegsfasteraswerunupasmallhill,feelingthe

burninmythighs.

“Whatadick.Areyousurethough?Imean,Ididn’tseearingandyouknowIhuntthatoutfirst

thing.”

“Yea,sodoI.Apparently,IantoldJulsthathewasmarried.Heprobablydidn’twearhisringsohe

couldfuckmeblind.OhandIalmostforgot,totopthenightoff,Justinfollowedmeoutsideandalludedto

mefuckinghimsincemarriedmenaremythingnow.”Asshole.

Joeysnapshisheadtowardsme,eyeswide.“Areyoufuckingseriousrightnow?Wherethefuck

wasIwhenallthiswashappening?Ohthat’sright,IwaseatingmyGoddamnedfeelings.”Hepicksup

hispaceasIstrugglebehindhim.

“Slowdown!Yourlegsaremileslongerthanmine.”

“Crap,sorry.”Hereturnstomyside.“I’msorryaboutReesecupcake.Ireallyam.But---”

“Don’tfuckingsayit,Joey.”Iknewexactlywhathisnextwordswouldbe.

“I’mjustsaying---”

“Shutit,Holt,”Ispatashespinsaroundtofaceme,effortlesslyrunningbackwards.

“Youcouldbethesexymistress.Ifthesexwasthatgood,whygiveitup?”NowIstartedsprinting

andhearasquealfromhimashecatchesupwithinseconds.

“Areyoumental?Iamnotgoingtobehisfuckbuddyontheside.Idon’tcarehowamazingthesex

wasorhowhardhemademecome.Fuckthatshit.”Iwipemyforeheadwiththebackofmyhand,the

sweatalreadystartingtobuildonmyskin.

“Ooohhhhowharddidhemakeyoucome?Washehuge?Pleasetellmeitdidn’thavesomeweird

hooktoitlikeBilly’sdid.”Heshakeshisheadquickly.“I’mnotquitesurehowIfeelaboutthatyet.”

“JesusChrist.Itiswaytooearlytotalkaboutdicksizesandwhichwaytheycurve.”Ipause.“But

fortherecord,he’smassiveandasstraightasyoupretendedtobeinhighschool.”

“Ifuckingknewit.Youluckybitch.”

Weraninsilencetherestofthewayaroundtheneighborhood,theonlynoisescomingfromusbeing

ourbreathingandthesoundofourshoesstrikingthepavement.Iranfastandhard,desperatelytryingto

pushthememoryofReeseandourhookupoutofmymindandhopingtorunawayfromit.Butthatwasn’t

goingtohappen,atleastnottoday.Anditwasn’thappeningformyrunningpartnereither.Icouldalmost

hearJoey’smindworkingasweran,mostlikelycomingupwithallthepossiblesecretrendezvous

scenariosbetweenReeseandmyself.Needlesstosay,thefivemiletrektodaywasbothmentallyand

physicallyexhausting.

IshoweredanddressedforthedayaftersayinggoodbyetoJoeysohecoulddothesame.Heonly

livedafewblocksfromthebakeryandwouldbebackbeforeweopenedat7:00a.m.Hewasmyonly

employeeatthemoment,seeingasIhadn’tgottenaroundtohiringanybodytoreplaceTiffanyafterIfired

her.Iwasn’tentirelysureIneededanybodyelsetoworkforme,JoeyandIseemedtomanagejustfineon

ourown.Igrewupwithhim,goingtohighschooltogetherandthentocollegewherewebothstudied

business.HewasmorethansupportivewhenIdreamedofopeningmyownbakeryandinsistedon

becomingmyassistantsothatwecouldstayclose.Although,deepdownIthinkhejustwantedtosample

allmynewcreations.ThankGodforourdailyruns,otherwiseI’mcertainwewouldbothbeasbigasa

house.

Itiemyfavoriteaprononandbeginpullingthepastries,muffins,cupcakes,andcookiesfromthe

backracksandbringingthemupfronttothedisplaycases.Thehousespecialtyismybanananutmuffins

thatIspentfiveyearsperfectingtherecipeon.Theyareinsanelydeliciousandit’sastrugglenottoeat

everyonemyselfstraightoutoftheoven.Isoldoutofthemeverydaybynoonandnothingmademe

prouder.Atafewminutesbeforeopening,Joeycomeshustlingthroughthedoorcarryingtwocoffeesand

hisawardwinningsmile.

“I’mdicktalkedoutsodon’teven,”IsayasIopentheregisterandcountthemoney.

“Cupcake,there’snosuchthing,trustme.Ihadthemputinanextrashotofespressoforyouthis

morning,figuredyoumightneedit,”hesays,walkingaroundthecounter.“Although,perhapsyou’dprefer

hardliquorwithyourcoffeetoday?”HehandsmemypipinghotcupandIsmileweakly.Heis

handsomelydressedindarkjeansandabrightbluepoloshirtthatbringsoutthecolorinhiseyes.

“Thanksandyes,liquorwouldbemypreferredbeveragethismorning,butIdon’tthinkthesightof

mestumblingaroundtheshopwastedoffmyasswouldbegoodforbusiness.”Itakeasipandletthehot

liquidrundownmythroat,instantlyperkingmeupasthefrontdoorswingsopen.“Goodmorning.And

howaremyfavoriteregularstoday?”

Mr.andMrs.Crisplivearoundthecornerandcomeintothestoproughlyeverymorningfortwoof

mybananamuffins.TheyarebeyondadorableandalwaysstartmydayoffwithasmilewhenIseethem.

“Well,besidesthefactthatthisonekeptmeupallnightsnoring,wearejustfine,Dylan.”Mrs.Crisp

motionstowardsherhusbandwhosmilessweetlyather.

“Youloveit,dear.I’msureyoutoldmeoncethatmysnoringhelpsyousleep.”Mr.Crisplovingly

rubshiswife’sbackasshebatshimawayplayfully.

“Ohthat’sridiculous,Harry,”shehuffs.IpullouttheirmuffinsasIsmileandplacetheminabag,

grabbingthemoneythatwasplacedonthecounter.“Andhowwasthewedding,dear?Youstickittothat

nastynogoodexofyours?”

IrollmyeyesafterhandingMr.Crisphischange.“NotthewayIwouldhavelikedto.”Icrossmy

armsovermychestandleanagainstthecounter.“Whatever,I’mjustgladit’soverwith.Thecakelooked

amazingandwasapparentlydelicious.”Imotiontowardsmyassistantwhoisnibblingonamuffin.“This

oneateanentiretierbyhimself.”

Hesnortsloudlyatmydeclaration.“Itwasnotanentiretier.Wellactually,yeahitprobablywas.”

Thefourofusalllaughtogetherashedevourshisbreakfast.Themancanputawaythesweets.

Thefrontdoorswingsopen,gettingourattentionandanoldergentlemancarryingawhiteboxwalks

inanduptothecounter.Mr.andMrs.Crispwavetheirgoodbyesandslipout.

“CanIhelpyou?”Iask,staringattheboxquestionably.Itdoesn’thaveanylabelsonit,givingno

indicationastowhereit’sfrom.

Heplacesitinfrontofmewithasmile.“Goodmorning.DeliveryforaMs.Dylan.”Myeyeswiden

asJoeystepsnexttome.

“Whatthehelldidyouorder?”heasksasIsigntheslipfortheman.

“Ididn’torderanythingIdon’tthink.Whosentthis?”Themanjustshrugshisshouldersandtakes

hisclipboard,pushingtheboxtowardsmeonthecounterandwalkingquicklyoutofthebakery.Weboth

stareatthebox,glancingupandmeetingeachother’seyes.

“Well,aren’tyougoingtoopenit?”heasks,archinghisbrowsatme.

Istudyitsuspiciouslybeforereplying.“Idon’tknow,don’tbombscomeinunmarkedpackages?”

“Whothehellwouldtrytobombyou?”

“Wellforstarters,acertainwifeofacertainsomeonethatbangedmybackoutSaturdaynight,”I

huff.Hemakesafaceatmeandpullsthewhiteribbonthatistiedonthetop,liftingthesidesoftheboxto

revealafoldedbrowncardontopofwhitetissuepaper.Iopenthecardandquicklyscanthehand

writing.

Dylan,

Ifuckedup.I’msosorry.Iwouldlovetoseeyouagain.

XReese

Mymouthdropsopen.“Youhavegottobekiddingme.”IhandthecardtoJoeyandhearhimgasp

afterafleetingmoment.

“Holyshit.Hewouldlovetoseeyouagain?Dylan!”

Snatchingthecardback,IpullapartthetissuepaperandcockmyheadtothesideasIstareatthe

contentsofthebox.“Whatthehell?”

Joeyleansinandgawks.“Oh.My.God.ThishastobethesweetestthingI’veeverseen.”

Ipulloutapoundofflouranddropitonthecounterashesquealsnexttome.“Whywouldhesend

meflour?”Iambeyondconfusedrightnowwhilemyassistantisbouncingaroundlikeabunny.You

wouldthinkbythewayhe’sreactingthatI’mcurrentlystaringatanengagementringinsteadofbaking

supplies.

“Don’tyougetit?Insteadofflowershesentyoufloursinceyou’reabaker.Shit,that’sromantic.”

Ishovehimandhedoesn’tbudge.“Romantic?Amarriedmanjustwrotemesayinghewantsto

keepfuckingmeontheside.He’smarried,Joey.Thisisnotromantic.It’ssleazyanddisgusting.”Picking

upmycoffeeandsteppingawayfromthecounter,Istareattheflourandtakegeneroussips.Thisis

insaneandmyassistantisanidiot.

“You’remissingsomekeyadjectivesthere.Ahotmarriedmanwantstokeeprightlyfuckingyouon

theside.Youmusthaveblownhismindgirl.Plushesendsyoupresents?Iwanthimasmysecret

boyfriend.”

Ishakemyhead.“Whatapompousasshole.HemustthinkI’msometwobitwhoretowillingly

submittothisjokeofarequest.Fuckingdouche-bag.”IpickthecardupandtossitinthetrashasJoey

lungesforit.“Leaveit.”

“No.Atleastkeepitforaday.Youmightchangeyourmind.”

“YouarehighoffyourassifyouthinkIwouldactuallyconsiderthis.”

“IfuckingwishIwashighrightnow.Thatwouldbeanexcuseformyinsanecaseofthemunchies.”

Hethrowshishandsupdramatically.

Webothgiggleateachotherandthesituation.Ofcoursethisismylife.Icouldn’thavesomehot

guywhogavemethebestorgasmbeinterestedinme.No,thatwouldbetoonormal.Hehastobeahot

marriedbestorgasmgiverwithamouthIwouldpaytohaveonmeagain.Figures.

**

Themorningwentbyquicklywiththesteadyflowofcustomers.Mondaysarealwaysbusierinthe

bakery,mainlywithwalkinspecialtyrequestswhichIenjoyedimmenselyandJoeyhated.Hepreferred

thatIwasn’ttiedupinconsultationsalldaysothatwecouldchitchatandgossip.Itwasclosetonoon

whenJulswalkedin,lookingaschicaseverinhertightpencilskirt,whiteblouse,andheelstodiefor.I

reallyneededtoraidherclosetsomeday.Besidestheheightdifferencebetweenus,weweresimilarly

builtandcouldswapclotheseasily.Wewerebothslenderyettoned,givenhowreligiouswebothwere

aboutourexerciseroutines.

“Hello,lovies.Andhowiseveryone’sMondaygoing?”

ImoanasJoeysmilesbig,showingoffhislonelydimple.“Youlookhot,Juls.Gotameetingwith

anannoyingcouple?”IaskasIstraightenouttheremainingredvelvetcupcakesinthedisplaycase.

“Actually,IwasjustabouttoheadovertoIan’sworktohavelunch.YouknowIgottalookgoodfor

mybaby.”

Iperkup.Perfect.Icouldtellhimoffinperson.“MindifIjoinedyou?”

ShetiltsherheadtothesideasJoeygaspsdramatically.“Areyougoingtoconfronthim?”The

excitementinhisvoiceisalmostpalpable.

Inodfirmly.“Hellyes,Iam.Ifhethinkshecanpropositionmetobehisdirtylittlesecret,heis

seriouslymistaken.”

“Excuseme?WhatthefuckhaveImissed?”Julsbringsbothhandstoherhipsandstaresatme,

waitingforanexplanation.Ofcourse,beforeIcanspeak,Joeyopenshisbiggaymouth.

“Well---,”herestshischinonhishand,“---Reesesentoursexyfriendhereanotewithsomeflour

sayingthathewassorryaboutfuckingupandwouldlovetoseeheragain.”Hisgrincrackshisfaceopen.

“Isn’tthatfantastic?”

Shestaresatuswithafurrowedbrow.“Areyouserious?Ohdamnit,Imeanttoconfronthimatthe

weddingafteryouleft,Dyl,butheactuallydisappearedprettysoonafteryoudid.Besides,Iwasabit

preoccupied.Anddidyousayhesentyouflour?Asinbakingflour?”Inodandsheraiseshereyebrows,

hermouthslowlyforminganO.“Ah,insteadofthetraditionalflowers.That’sactuallyprettyclever.”

Istompmyfoot.“Ohforfuck’ssake.WhyamItheonlypersonthatdidn’tgetthat?Anditwasn’t

clever.Itwasstupid,becausehe’sstupid.”

“Wow,you’rereallyguttinghimwiththatinsult,”JoeystatessarcasticallyasIpullmyapronoff.I

throwitathisface.

“Well?”Iask,turningtoJuls.

“Wellwhat?”

“CanIcomewithyou?”

“Ohhellyes.Iwouldlovetoseeyouchewhimanewone.Ican’tstandcheaters.”Webothmove

towardsthedoorasInodinagreement.

“Hey!Whataboutme?”Joeyyells.

Iturnmyhead.“Youneedtostayhereandmantheshop.WhatdidyouthinkIwasgoingtoclose

downforthis?”

“Goddamnit!Thisiswhyweneedanotheremployee,Dylan.Ifuckingmisseverything.”

“Don’tworry,I’llgiveyouallthedetailsafterIcutoffhistesticles.”JulsandIwalkoutofthe

shoptogetherandtowardshercarasIgivemyselfamentalpeptalk.Yellfirstthenremoveballsor

removeballsthenyell.Hell,diditmatter?

I’mslowlybeginningtolosemyedgeaswewalkintothecrispsleekfoyeroftheWalker&

Associatesbuilding.Juls’heelsareclickingonthemarbleandIinwardlycursemyselffornotchanging

myoutfitbeforeIsobravelydecidedthatthiswasagoodidea.I’mwearingapalebluebuttonupshirt,

skinnyjeansthataredustedinflour,andmyfavoriteballetflats.ThiswouldhavebeensobadassifIwas

wearingsomethingsexyandrevealing,showingReesewhathewouldnevertouchagain.Damnit,Dylan.

Thinknexttime.Atleastmyhairandmakeupareonpoint.Westepofftheelevatorsontothetwelfthfloor

andIfollowcloselybehindher,unsurewheretogo.

“Nervous?”sheasksasshewalksuptoasmallreceptionarea.

“Nope,buthebetterbe.”ShethrowsherheadbackandlaughsasIwigglemybrows.

“JuliannaWicksforIanThomasplease,”shesaystotheprettyreceptionistwhosmilesandpicksup

thephone,talkingsoftlyintoit.Sheendsthecallquickly.

“Gorightin,Ms.Wicks.”

Sheshrugshershouldersplayfully.“Ifuckinglovethisshit.MymanissoimportantthatIneedto

checkinwithsomeonebeforeIbargein.”Igiggleatherandfollowherthroughacloseddooraftershe

knocksquietly.

“There’smygirl.I’vebeenwaitingforyou.”Ianstandsupandwalksaroundhisdesk,pullingJuls

intohisarmsandsmotheringherwithquickkisses.Christ,theywereannoyinglyadorable.“I’mstarving

andnotjustforfood,”hewhispersbeforehiseyesflicktome.“Dylan.Areyoujoiningusforlunch

today?”hesweetlyasksasheplayswiththeendsofJuls’hair.HesoundssincerebutIhaveafeelingthat

he’dmuchratherspendhislunchalonewithmybestfriend.

Iclearmythroat.Youcandothis,Dylan.“Actually,IwaswonderingifReesewashere.Ineeded

tospeakwithhim.”JulsistoobusyfranticallyworkingatlooseningIan’stietoevenrememberthatIam

intheroom.I’msureshewouldhavesnuckinabitchyremarkhadshebeenpayingattention.

“Oh,ofcourse.”Hesmileswide.“Justcontinuedownthehallwayuntilyouseetheredheadatthe

receptiondesk.She’llpointyouinhisdirection.”Inodandturnonmyfeet,givingJulsonelastglanceas

Istepout,closingthedoorbehindme.

He’smarried.He’smarried.He’smarried.Whocareshowfuckinginsanelyhotheis.He’s

married.

Mythoughtsaresoloudinmyhead,I’msuretheredheadthatIamnowstandinginfrontofcan

hearthem.Ismileweaklyather.

“MayIhelpyou?”sheasksinarathersnippytone.

“Um,yes.IwouldliketoseeReese,please.”

Shecocksherheadandnarrowshereyes.Jesus.Retracttheclaws.Pickingupherphone,hereyes

runslowlydownmybody.“YoumeanMr.Carroll?AndwhomayIsayisaskingforhim?”

Mr.Carroll.Ohhowfuckingformal.

Iglaredownather.“Dylan.”

“JustDylan?”HertoneisborderlinebitchyandIambeyondoveritatthispoint.Sweetie,thisis

notthedaytotestmypatience.

“Yes,justDylan,”Isnapback,handsfistingatmysides.

Sherollshereyesandspeakssoftlyintothephone,slammingitdownwithmoreforcethanis

probablynecessary.“Goonin,justDylan.”Shemotionswithaquickswipeofherhandtowardsadoor

thatstandsattheendofthehallway.Whatthehellisherproblem?

“Thankyou.Haveaniceday,”Ireplyextracheerfullytopluckherlastnerve.Shescowls.Mission

Accomplished.

Notbotheringtoknock,Iopentheofficedoorandstepinside,stumblingabitatthesightoftheman

behindthemassivedesk.Yup,that’swhathelookslike.Completelyperfect.Hiseyesslowlycomeupto

minefromhiscomputerscreenandsoften.

“Dylan,thisisapleasantsurprise.Iassumeyoureceivedmypackage?”

Iclosethedoorbehindmeandcrossmyarms.“Yeah,cutepun.Doyouhaveaminute?”

HesmilesandIstumbleabit.“Foryou?Ihaveseveral.”

Standingup,hegracefullymoveshisbodyaroundthedeskandsitsontheedge,crossinghislong

legsinfrontofhimattheanklesandbracinghimselfonhishands.Ishakemyheadathiscockiness.Damn

ittohell.Ifhewasn’tsogloriouslyattractive,thiswouldbesomucheasier.Hestandsbeforemeina

lightbluedressshirt,grayplaidtieandkhakis,hishairaperfectmessandhisgreeneyesfreezingme

whereIstand.Heraisesaneyebrow,waitingformetospeak.Icouldspeak.Ihadalottosay.Butright

now,Iwantedtoeitherthrowhimdownandfuckhimrightonhisdeskorslaphimsohardacrosshisface

thathewouldfeelitnextweek.Hmm,Icoulddoboth.OhChris,Dylan.No.Slappinghim.Thatsounds

satisfying.Imovequickly,hiseyeswideningasIstopjustinfrontofhimandstrikehimacrosshisface,a

loudcrackechoingthroughouttheroom.

“JesusChrist,”healmostyells,hishandcomingupandrubbinghisnowreddenedcheek.“Whatthe

fuck?”

“Youfuckingprick.Whothehelldoyouthinkyouare?”

Hestandsup,toweringovermeinmyflats.Fuck,he’sasbigasatree.“Okay,Iprobablydeserved

that.”Histoneissharpbuthedoesn’tsoundangry.Heseemsmoreconcernedthananything.“Look---,”he

pauses,rubbinghischeek,“---I’msorryIkindofshutdownafterthebathroom.I’mnotusedtosexgetting

tomelikethatandIhandleditlikeanasshole.”

Iseered.“Areyouseriousrightnow?That’swhyyou’resorry?Becauseyoufreakedout

afterwards?”

“Yes,wellthatandthefactthatthosemensawyouintherewithme.I’msuretheyknewexactly

whatwe’dbeendoing.”Hestepsclosertome.“WhythefuckelsewouldIbesorry?I’mnotsorryit

happened.Areyou?”

Ipushagainsthischestbuthedoesn’tmove.Damnit,Ineedtostartliftingweights.“Yes,I’m

sorryithappened.Idonotfuckmarriedmen,Reese!”I’mshoutingnowandmythroatbeginstoachebut

notenoughtomakemestop.However,hiscurrentlookofconfusionistakingawaysomeofmyfire.He’s

asmartguy.Whyisn’thegraspingthis?

“Okay,that’sgoodtoknow,”hesayswithafurrowedbrow.

“Great.Nowyouknow.Sostaythefuckawayfromme.”Igotoleavebutamstoppedbyhisgripon

myarm,turningmearoundtofacehim.

“Whatthefuckareyoutalkingabout?”

Istepoutofhisgraspandlookdownathislefthand,narrowinginonhisbarefinger.“Youasshole.

Whydon’tyouwearyourring?Hopingtogetyourdicksuckedbehindthatmassivedeskofyoursbysome

girlthatdoesn’tknowyou’remarried?”

Hislookstunsme.Ihadexpectedhimtogetangrywithmeforslappinghim,maybeabit

disappointedinmefornotwantingtopursuethisanyfurther,buttheamusedlookonhisfacewasnot

whatIwasexpecting.Herunshishandsdownhisfaceandlaughs,stoppingonlywhenheseesmy

hardenedexpression.

“Married?WhothefucktoldyouIwasmarried?”

Istepback.“Juls.Answermyquestion.Whydon’tyouwearyourring?”

“Really?AndwheredidJulshearthatIwasmarried?”

Ithrowmyhandsupinfrustration.“Whatthefuckdoesthatmatter?FromIan.Whoelse?”

Hegrabsmyhandandpullsmewithhimtowardsthedoor,swingingitopenandstormingdownthe

hallway.

“Wherearewegoing?Letgoofme.”

“Shutup,Dylan.”Myfightingisuseless.HeisclearlyonamissionashewalkstowardsIan’s

officedoor,draggingmyinfuriatedselfbehindhim.“We’resettlingthisrightnow.”

“Settlingwhat?”

“Mr.Carroll,Mr.Thomastoldmetoholdhiscalls.”

“It’sfine,Jill,”hegruntsatthenicereceptionistasheswingstheofficedooropen,pullingmeinto

theroomwithhim.

“Fuck.Whatthefuck,Reese?”Ian’svoicecausesmetoshriekandthenIfocusonwhatis

happeninginfrontofme.MyeyeswidenatthesightofJulsbentoverIan’sdesk,completelynakedand

gettingfuckedfrombehind.IanquicklymovesandcoversherupasReeseandIspinaroundandshutthe

doortokeepthecuriouseyesfromthehallwayfromgettingashow.

“Shit.Uh,sorry,man.Thiswillonlytakeaminute,”Reesesaysaswebothstareatthedoor.

“JesusChrist,Dylan.Iwassofuckingclose,”Julsgrowls.

Iholdmyhandsup.“Thiswasnotmyidea.Blametheassholenexttome.”Hisheadflickstowards

mineandIstarehimdown.Yeahthat’sright.Isaidit.

“Well?Whatthefuckisit?”Ianasks,stilloutofbreath.

“WhythehelldidyoutellJulsthatIwasmarried?”

Helaughs.“Uh,Ididn’t.You?Married?That’sfuckinghilarious.Babe,whotoldyouReesewas

married?”

“Youdid.LastweekwhenweallwenttoTheTavernafterwork.Right?”Shesoundsnervousand

suddenlyunsureofherself.

“Thisissofuckingstupid.CanIgoplease?”IaskandReese’sarmshootsoutandpreventsmefrom

grabbingthedoorhandle.Itrytopushitawaybutmyeffortsareuseless.

“Babe,Ithinkyou’vemistakenReeseforTrent.Trentismarried.”

Mystomachdrops.

“Oh.Ohfuck,you’reright.Dylan,I’msosorry.Shit,IreallythoughtitwasReese.Honestmistake

though,right?”Shegigglesnervouslyandclearsherthroat.

Idropmyheadintomyhands.“JesusChrist.”Igroan,hearingamuffledlaughcomingfrommyleft

andsuddenlywantingtohurlmyselfoutthenearestwindow.OhGod,thisisawkward.

“Well,nowthatthere’snoconfusion,canyoutwolovebirdspleasegetthefuckoutsoIcan

finish?”Ianuttersthroughalaugh.“Andlockthedoorbehindyou.”

“Yup.Uh,meetyoudownstairs,Juls.”Iquicklyopenthedoor,beginningtomakemywaytowards

theelevatorswhenapairofhandsgrabmywaistandspinme.

“Ohno.Idon’tthinkso,”Reesestates,grippingmyelbowandleadingmebackdownthehallway

andstraighttohisoffice.Shit.He’snotmarried.Nowwhat?

Four

Iwascompletelyunpreparedforthisturnofevents.Everythingwasexecutedperfectlyonmyside.I

slappedhim,calledhimoutonhisinfidelity,anddidn’tallowhisblindinggoodlookstodetermeinany

way.IfeltpowerfulstormingintohisofficeandtellinghimoffthewayIdid.Butnow,nowIfeellikea

meeklittlechurchmouseasIcowerinthecornerofhisoffice.Heisn’tmarried.ThatwasnotsomethingI

wasexpectingtodiscoveranddefinitelynotsomethingIwaspreparedtohavetocontemplate.Imean,

whatdidwesharetogetherotherthanahotflingatawedding?Therewasn’tanythingdeepergoingon

here,wasthere?No,surelynot.Noonedevelopsrelationshipsfromsluttyweddingsexencounters.

That’snothowthosethingswork.Iftheydid,Joeywouldbeinanewrelationshipeveryothermonth.My

eyesslowlytrailuphislongleanbodyandstoponhiseyesthatarecuriouslywatchingme.Hehas

regainedhisperchonhisdeskandhasn’tsaidawordasIfidgetwithmyfingers,debatingonwhereto

start.Fuck.Iowedhimamajorapology.Iclearmythroatandstepclosertohim,seeinghimshiftabiton

hisdesk.

“So,IwaswonderingifitwasatallpossibleforyoutocompletelyforgetthatIcamestormingin

herelikeacrazypersonandassaultedyou.Ifnot,I’mnotentirelyabovegroveling.”

Hetiltshisheadandstrokeshisjawwithhishand.Pushingoffthedesk,hebridgesthegapbetween

us.“Well,youdidthinkIwasamarriedmanwhowasfuckingaroundbehindhiswife’sback.Ithinkthat

slapwasjustifiedfromyourpointofview.”Hishandbrushesmyhairoffmyshoulder,thesmallgesture

causingmystomachtoknotup.“Besides,Iwouldhatetocompletelyforgethowincrediblysexyyou

lookedallfeistyandpissedoff.”

Ilaughslightly.“Youthoughtthatwassexy?”

Henodsandlickshislipashestaresatmymouth.Istepintohim,feelinghishandsgriptightlyonto

myjeanedhips.“Wellthen,Icouldripyouanewoneforactinglikeatotaldipshitafteryoufuckedme.

It’syourcall.”HischestheavesrapidlyasIrunmyhandsuphisarmsandstoponhisbiceps,squeezing

oncebeforeflickingmyeyesuptohis.Hardmusclestenseagainstmyhands.

“Doyourworst,”hewhispers.

Myfingerstrailupthelengthofhistie.Yellingathimtomakehimwantmewastempting.Really

tempting.Buthehadtechnicallyalreadyapologizedforhisbehavior,andrightnow,Ididn’twanttoyell.

Notunlesshewasfuckingitoutofme.

Grippinghistieinmyfist,Ipullhimbackbehindhisdeskandpushhimdownintohischair.“I

choosegroveling,”Ideclareashiseyeswiden.Kneelingbeforehimandsteadyingmyfingers,Islipthem

intohisbelt,looseningitandunzippinghiskhakis.

“Dylan.”

MyhandgripshislengthandIpullhimout,flickingmytongueacrosstheheadandglancingupinto

hiseyesthatarenowglazedwithlust.Mytongueswirlsaroundtheheadanddowntheshaft,lickingevery

inchofhim.Itrailsoftkissesalongtheseamashiseyesstaygluedonmymouth,hislipspartingandhis

breathcomingoutinquickbursts.

“That’ssohot,love.Suckithard.”

Ismileandwrapmylipsaroundhim,guidinghimtothebackofmythroatasheletsoutahiss.I

wanttotakehimcompletely,butthatisn’tgoingtobepossible.Notwithwhatthismanisworkingwith.

Wrappingmyhandaroundthebase,Istrokehimwithmymouth,suckingandlickingashishandsfindmy

hair.

“Jesus.Justlikethat.Don’tstop.”

Hishandsguidemeatthepacehewants.Upanddown,lickingaroundtheheadbeforeItakehimin

asfarasIcan.Myhandstrokeshimtightly,glidingupanddownhisslicklengthasmymouthfollowsits

path.Hisfingersbrushdownmytemple,alongmycheekandacrossmyjaw.Ikeepmyeyesonhisface,

seeingthemusclesinhisnecktensewitheachsuckandhisheadfallbackontohischairwhenIlickthe

tip.Hemoans,thrustinghishipsintomymovementsashishandsholdmyheadinplace.Ineverwasa

hugefanofblowjobs,butthenoisescomingfromReeserightnowaremakingthisinsanelyhot.Iwasn’t

justgettinghimoff,Iwasgettingmyselfoff.MythighsarepressedtightlytogetherasIkneelinfrontof

himandIknowwithoutadoubtthatmypantiesaredrenched.Hepulsesagainstmytongue.Suckinghard,

IpullhimdeepandlethimhitthebackofmythroatasIrelaxmymuscles.

“Fuck.I’mgonnacome.”

Ipumphimwithmyhandandfeelhishotreleaseshootintomymouth,swallowingandfeelingeven

morepowerfulinthismomentthanIdidwhenIstormedintothisoffice.Hislegstenseundermeandhis

throatygruntscausemetosuckharder,pullingeverybitoutofhim.Heloosenshisgriponmyhairand

gentlybrushesitoutofmyface.

“Holyfuckingshit.”

Isitbackonmyheelsandsmileatmyminorvictory.He’sstilldesperatelyhardandIwanttodoit

again,andagain.MakinghimcomeapartwithmymouthhasbeenoneofthehottestthingsI’veeverdone.

Plushetastesgood.Reallygood.Iglanceupintohiseyesashisbreathingsteadies,hischestpullingat

thebuttonsonhisdressshirt.

“I’mnotsurewhat’ssexier,youyellingatmeoryougroveling,”hesaysthroughagrinthat’sas

infectiousasitisadorable.Ismileandbitemylipasmyphonebeepsinmypocket.Iquicklyslipitout.

Juls:Icame.Didyou?Timetogo,sweets.

“Thanksforlunch,”Isayplayfully,hissmilestillonhisfaceasheresituateshimselfandstands,

offeringmehishand.Iplacemineinhisandstandonmywobblylegs.Holycrap,IfeltlikeIjustcame.

“Thatwasincredible.”Hepresseshislipsagainstmysoftly,lingeringforamomentasmyphone

beepsagain.

“Shit.Sorry,Ihaveabakerytorun.Later,handsome.”Ipullawayfromhimandturntoseehim

shakinghishead.“Ohbytheway,I’dlikemypantiesback.”Ikeepmyhandonthedoorknobwhile

waitingforhisresponse.

“Wouldyou?”Hisvoiceisthickandcausesmetoclampmythighstogether.Myurgetothrowhim

backontohisdeskandridehimisstrongerthanever.

Inodandregainmycomposer.“Yes,Iwould.Thatpairhappenedtobeafavoriteofmine.”

Herunsahandthroughhishairashesmoothsouthistiewiththeother.“Toobad,they’realsoa

favoriteofmine.”HearcheshisbrowandIgripthedoorknobtighter.Holyfuck.“IsupposeIcouldget

youanotherpair.Although,I’mnotaccustomedtoperusinglingerieshops,andImightgetthewrongones.

Maybeyoushouldgowithme.”

Ohman.

ThethoughtofReesebuyingmepantiesisunbelievablyhot.Icanpicturehim,walking

aroundandstudyingeachpairwithhiscuriousstare,hishandsrakingthroughhishairwhenhecan’tfind

theoneshe’slookingfor.Ismileattheimagebutquicklyshakeitoff.Ishouldn’tseemtooaffectedbythis

guy.“I’msorry,aren’tIstandingintheofficeofaCPA?You’reapartnerright?”Henods,crossinghis

armsoverhischestashewatchesme.“ThenasmartguylikeyouwhoI’massumingdidn’tfuckhisway

tothetopshouldn’thaveaproblemfindingthemonhisown.Unless,youdidfuckyourwaytothetop?”I

cockaneyebrowandgrinasheshakeshishead,tryingdesperatelytoholdbackhissmile.“Youcansend

thembywayofyourflourdeliveryboy.”HisgrinburststhroughasIquicklyexithisoffice,mycheeks

burningfrommyflushedstate.

**

“Well?”Julsasksaswemakeourwaybacktothebakery.

“Wellnothing.He’snotmarriedapparently.”IkeepastraightfacebutfeellikeI’mradiatingfrom

theinsideout.GivingReesealunchtimeblowjobhasmademyweekandIcan’tgethisreactiontoitout

ofmyhead.HiswidenedeyesasIpulledhimout,hisfacewhenhecame,thefeelofhishandsinmyhair.

Ishakemyheadandsnapoutofmystupor.

Shelaughs.“Idon’tknowwhoyouthinkyou’retalkingtohere.ButI’myourbestfriend,Dylan,and

Iknowthatface.Youlikehim.”

“I’msorry,didyougetthesensefuckedoutofyoubackthere?Idonotlikehim.Hewasmy

weddinghookup.”

“Firstofall,yesIdidgetthesensefuckedoutofmeasIalwaysdowithIan.Themanisan

Adonis.”

“TMI.”Ichuckle.

“Andsecondly,youtotallylikehim,otherwiseyouwouldn’thavecaredifhewasmarriedornot.”

Ishakemyhead.“Please.TheonlyreasonwhyIcaredwasbecausetheideaofsleepingwitha

marriedmanwaseatingawayatme.Now,thatfeelingofshameisgone.”

Shepullsupinfrontoftheshopandputsherescaladeinpark.“Andnowthatfeelingofshamehas

beenreplacedwithlove?”

Ibarkoutalaughandopenthedoor.“I’mafraidyou’remistaken.Westillonfordrinkstomorrow

night?”

“Hellyes.GiveJoJokissesforme.”Iwavetoherbeforesteppingintotheshop,spottingJoey

pacingbehindthecounter.

Hishandsarecontinuallytuggingattheendsofhishairandhelooksthoroughlystressedand

irritated.Turningtowardsthesoundofmeentering,hedropshishandsdramatically.“Forfuck’ssake.I

havebeendyingherewhileyoutwowhoresplayedcastratetheadulterer.Whathappened?”

Iwalkbehindthecountertojoinhimanddownmynowcompletelycoldcoffee.“Calmdown,you

queen.Wedidn’tcastrateanybody.”

Heraisesabrowsuspiciously.“Wellwhythehellnot?Wasn’tthatthewholepointofstormingover

there?”

I’mabouttoanswerwhentheshopdooropens.Joeystraightensupandsharplyturnstowardsthe

door.“We’reclosed,”hebarkstowardsthecustomerasIfoldoverinlaughter.

“Joey.”Inudgehimandhesmiles.“He’sjustkidding,sir,howcanIhelpyou?”

Thegray-hairedmansmilesandmovesuptothecounter.“Goodafternoon.Doyouhaveanytarts?I

lovetartsandhaven’thadoneinyears.”Heeyesupmydisplaycaseandtapslightlyontheglasswithhis

hands.

“I’mabitofatartsugar,”Joeysaysinhisoverlyflirtatiousvoice.

“GoodLord.No,sir,I’msorryIdon’tmaketarts.Although,maybeIwill.Whatkinddoyoulike?”

Hesmilessweetlyashiseyeslightup.“Ohallkinds.Strawberry,blueberry,kiwi,they’reall

delicious.”

Igiggleathisenthusiasmandpulloutanotepad,scribblingdownareminder.“I’lltellyouwhat,I

willpersonallymakesometartsandhavethemintheshopreadyforyoubytheendoftheweek.How

doesthatsound?”

“That’sperfect.Thanks,sugar.I’llstopinsometimeonFriday.”Hewinksatmebeforeturningand

leavingtheshop,thedoordingingclosedbehindhim.

Joeyshakeshisheadatme.“Doyouhavetobesoaccommodatingallthetime?Wedoenough

specialrequestsasitis.”

Iplacemynotepadonthecounterandputmyhandonmyhip.“Hey,specialrequestsarewhatmake

Dylan’sSweetToothdifferentfromalltheotherbakeriesaroundhere.Youcan’tjustwalkintoCrumbs

GaloreonMainStreetandaskforsomethingtheydon’tmake.Ilikebeingapproachableand

accommodating.Itgivesmeanedge.”Herollsthiseyesbutsmilesatme,knowingthatI’monehundred

percentright.Wordofmouthabouthowcustomerscanprettymuchrequestanythinginmyshophasgotten

meatonofbusinessoverthepastthreeyears.Ishrugandcontinue.“Now,wouldyouliketotalkabout

howawesomewearecomparedtoourcompetition,orwouldyouliketotalkabouthowReeseisn’t

married?”

Hiseyeswidenandhestumbles.“Isn’t?Asinhe’ssingle?Asinyoucancontinuetofuckhim?”

MyeyesrakethroughthedisplaycaseandIstraightenup.“Hmmm,holdon.Weneedmoreblack

bottoms.”ImovetowardsthedoorwaythatleadsbacktothekitchenwhenJoeygrabsmebythe

shoulders.

“Fuckthefuckingblackbottoms.Youowemeatleastanhourofuninterruptedgossip.”Hisfaceis

redandhiseyesarebuggingoutatme.

“AndIwilltellyoueveryjuicydetail,afterIgrabatrayofblackbottoms.”Heletsoutastringof

cursewordsandallowsmetostepintotheback.

IhonoredwhatIpromisedandsparednodetailwithJoeyasIplacedthecupcakesintothedisplay

case.Hestoodback,completelyenthralledbymyrundownofmylunchtimeofficevisit.Itoldhimabout

howIcaughtJulsgettingnailedbyIanonhisdeskandabouthowshehadmistakenReeseforTrent.I

mentionedhowReesethoughtmyangrytiradewassexyandhowIwasgoingtoyellathimagainbut

optedforablowjobinsteadtoproperlyapologizeformyfaceslap.AndIwrappedupwithhiswordsto

mewhenheapologizedforhisfreakoutbehavioratthewedding.

“Hesaidhe’snotusedtosexgettingtohimlikethat?Whatthehelldoesthatevenmean?”Joeyasks

ashewipesdowntheglassofthedisplaycase.

Ishrugandnibbleonamuffin.“Idon’tknow.Iwashopingyouhadsomewordsofwisdom.It’snot

likeI’manexpertonthisshitoranything.”

Hesilentlythinksforaminute,hishandholdinghisragstillontheglass.“Maybehemeansthatyou

gottohim.Likehewasonlygoingintoitasjustbeingwhatitwas,sluttyweddingsex,aone-timehook

up,asexyrompwithabridesmaid---”

“Iwasn’tabridesmaid.”Iinterjectandhishandcomesuptosilenceme.

“YouknowwhatImean.Heexpectedittobeaoneanddonedealbutwhathewasn’texpectingwas

you.OhmyGod,you’reagamechanger.Hewantsmorethanjustsluttyweddingsex.”

Iwasgoingthroughthemotionsofrollingmyeyesbutstopped.IsthatwhatReesemeant?DidI

affecthimtothepointoffreakout?Isthatevenagoodthing?No.There’snoway.Ishakemyhead.

“IthinkyouandJulsarestilldrunkfromthewedding.Thatguyiswaytoohotforme.Yes,I

managedtosomehowseducehimafterhehadseveraldrinksI’msure,butinnormaldailylifewhere

alcoholisn’tfreeflowingandI’musuallycoveredinpastryflourandicing,heiswaythehelloutofmy

league.”Ifinishoffmymuffinandtossthewrapperinthetrashcan.“Besides,hetoldmehehasn’thada

girlfriendsincecollege,whichI’msureisbychoice.Lookathim.”

Joeywalksaroundthecounter,grabbingmyhandandkissesthebackofit.“Yeah,hedoeshavethat

wholeunattainablebachelorvibegoingon.AndI’msurehegetsalotofass,butrightnow,hewantsyour

ass.”Hearcheshisbrowplayfully.“Fortherecord,Ihappentolikeyoucoveredinpastryflour.Andyou

arejustashotasheis.”

Ismilesweetlyathimashedropsmyhandandgetsbacktocleaning.Mytwoclosestfriendsare

crazy,rightlyoutoftheirminds.Andbetweenthetwoofthem,I’msuremyweddingtoReesewouldbe

plannedwithinthenextmonth.

**

Isleptforshitthatnight.ImagesofReese’sorgasmicfacekeptenteringmydreamsthatItriedtobe

ofanythingbuthim.Itwasauselessact.Nomatterwhatthoughtenteredmymind,whetheritwas

searchingmybrainforwhatexactlywasinatarttotheanniversarycakeconsultationIhadTuesday

morning;hisbeautifulfacewouldpopinuninvited.Tossinginmybedandnowcompletelydrenchedin

sweat,Isitupandglanceatmyalarmclock.3:15a.m.Jesus,Ihavetobeupinlessthantwohoursfor

myrunandhaven’tsleptawink.Islambackonmypillow.Thiscan’thappen.Icannotletsomehook

upaffectmelikethis.I’mnevergoingtogetagoodnight’ssleep.Youcanforgetaboutmymorning

runswithJoeyandfunctioningproperlyintheshop.I’lllosemybusinessandeverythingIworkedso

hardfor.No.Fuckthis.Hopingoutofbed,Ithrowmyselfintoafreezingcoldshowerandjoltmyself

evenmoreawake.Sleepisfortheweak.There’snowayI’mgettinganytonightsoImightaswellbake.

Afterdressing,Igrabmyphoneanddescendthestairstwoatatime.

IknewexactlywhatIwasgoingtomake.It’swhatIalwaysmadewhenIcouldn’tsleeporneededa

distraction.Mymochacupcakeswithespressobuttercreamfrosting.Theperfectcombinationofcaffeine

andchocolate,bothofwhichIcouldconsumeinmassivequantitiesrightnow.Iopenedmytatteredrecipe

bookandthumbedthroughituntilIstoppedonthefamiliarhandwriting.Itwasarecipeofmy

grandmother’sthatsheusedtomakewhenIwasalittlegirl,stumblingclumsilyaroundherkitchenasshe

bakedalldaylong.Shemadethemweeklyandalwaysletmehelpher,mybigbrowneyeswatchingher

withcompleteaweasshecrackedhereggswithonehandandneverneededameasuringspoonbecause

“arealcookwillalwaystrusthertastebudsoveranythingelse.”Mymotherhatedwhenshewouldmake

thisrecipewithmebecauseIwouldconsumetheminmassquantitiesandbeonaninsanesugarand

caffeinehighforhours.Mycrashwouldbeswiftandhard,usuallyresultinginmepassingoutinthe

middleofthelivingroomfloor.IalwaysthoughtofmygrandmotherwhenImadethese.Shepassedaway

tenyearsagoanditmademesadtothinkthatshewouldnevergettoseeherinfluenceonmenow.After

pullingtogetherallofmyingredientsandstartingthecoffeemaker,IcreateagrouptextmessagewithJuls

andJoey.

Me:Justsoyouarebothaware,its3:30a.m.andIammakingmy

mochacupcakes.Yes,youreadthatcorrectlyandyes,it’sbecauseI

haven’tsleptatall.Don’tbotheraskingmetogoforarunJoey.

Thatshiphassailed.

Oncethecoffeeisbrewed,ImixintheespressopowderandsetitasidetocoolwhileIwhipupthe

remainingingredients.ThesmellaloneperksmeupabitandIwasn’tfeelinglikeacompletepathetic

sleepdeprivedloseranymore.ThisiswhatIknew.Baking.IwasgoodatitandIcouldpracticallydoit

inmysleep.WhichIguessrightnowwasironicconsideringmycurrentzombielikestate.Mymind

beginstodriftasIwhipthebatter,watchingtheelectricbeatersmixtheeggsandsugars.Iwonderif

Reeselike’smochacupcakes?Ormaybehe’sacookieguy.Shit.Iturnthemixeroffandputmybowl

ontothecounterasIrubmyeyes.Focus,Dylan.Youcouldloseafuckingfinger.Icombinetheegg

mixturewithmybatterandwhipitquicklybeforedividingthebatterevenlyintomycupcakeliners.After

Ishovethetraysintotheoven,Igettoworkontheicing.

Theicingismadeofespressopowder,vanilla,butter,andpowderedsugar.It’sridiculouslysweet

andoneofmyfavorites.IcouldliveoffofthisstuffifIhadto.Becausereally,isthereanythingbetter

thanicing?SexwithReese,hislips,hishandstouchingme,hissounds...

“UGH!”Iyell,slammingmyhandsdownontothecoolcounter.Thisisinsane.Whatthefuckis

wrongwithme?I’veneverbeenthisaffectedbyaguybefore.IwaswithJustinfortwoyearsandcould

godayswithouttalkingtoorseeinghimandnotevenmisstheasshole.WhichIguessinhindsightshould

havebeenadeadgiveaway.Imean,shouldn’tyouwanttoseeyoursignificantothernonstop?ButIdidn’t,

andthatwasatleastarelationship.This,whateveritisthatReeseandIaredoingorweredoingandI

maybecompletelycrazytoassumethatwewillcontinuedoingit.Thisisnotserious.AndIneedtoget

myshittogetherandstopactinglikeitis.Ipullthecupcakesoutoftheovenandlaythemonthecounterto

coolwhileItesttheicing.

“Mmmm.Perfect.”I’mhalftemptedtosayfuckthecupcakesandgrabaspoonandretreatback

upstairswithmybowl.ButIyawninstead.Andyawnagain.Glancingatmyphone,theblurrednumbers

read4:27a.m.asmyeyelidsrefusetostayopen.Withathirdyawn,Ipullupastoolandpropmyheadon

myfistasIsitandwaitforthecupcakestocool.ThenIcouldicethemandgetreadyformyday.Yup.

That’sexactlywhatI’mgoingtodo.Ididn’tneedsleep.BecausewithsleepcamedreamsofReeseandI

didn’tneedthat.Myeyelidsfallshutandmybreathingsteadies.Nope,definitelydon’tneedsleep.Or

Reese.

Five

“Cupcake,Ithinkyouneedtowakeupnow.”

Myeyesslowlyflutteropenandthebrightsunlightbeamingthroughmywindowmakesmeclose

themtightagain.“Shit.”Irolloverandcovermyheadwithmypillow,hearingJoey’ssoftgiggle.

“Seriously,Dylan,you’regoingtosleepthedayawayifyoudon’tgetup.”

Sleepthedayaway?

Ipushbackontomyshinstolookattheclock.

“It’s3:30?Intheafternoon?Fuck.”Ishootoutofbedandrunintothebathroom.“Joey,whythehell

didyouletmesleepthislate?AndhowdidIevengetuphere?”Hefollowsmeintothebathroomand

leansagainstthedoorasIbrushmyteethandunrulyhair.

“Firstofall,Icameinthismorningtofindyoupassedoutfacedownontheworkbench.So,being

theniceguythatIam,Icarriedyouuphereandputyoutobed.”

Isplashmyfacewithcoldwateranddryitwithatowel,turningtosmileathim.“OhGod.IbetI

wasasight.”HeshrugsandstepsasideasIwalkintothebedroomandbegingettingdressed.

“Andsecondly,Ihavebeentryingtowakeyouforthepastfourhours.”

Irollmyeyesathisstatement.Ofcoursehe’sbeentryingtowakemeupandI’vesleptthroughit.

Whatthehelldon’tIsleepthroughbesidesmyalarm?IsliponmyjeansandablacktanktopbeforeI

walkoutfrombehindthepartition.“Fourhours?Jesus.Ohshit.”Mystomachdrops.“Imissedmy

consultation.”

HesmilessweetlyatmeandIwanttopunchhim.Whatishe,mental?That’smoneylost.“Relax,I

tookcareofit.Mrs.Freywasmorethanhappytomeetwithmesinceyouweresufferingfromastomach

bug.You’rewelcome.”

“Iloveyou.Youknowthatright?”

Hewrapsmeupintoabighugandkissesthetopofmyhead.“Youbetter.Comeon,Ihave

somethingtoshowyou.”

Ifollowhimdownthestairsandintothebakery.Everythingisinperfectorder,whichIknewit

wouldbe.JoeyismorethancapableofhandlingshitwhileIsleptmylifeaway.“God,I’mstarving.Ifeel

likeIhaven’teatenindays.Ooohhhandyouicedthemochacupcakes.”Ipullablueberrymuffinoutfrom

thealmostbaredisplaycaseandbeginnibblingonitwhilespacingouttheremainingtreats.Joeyemerges

fromthebackcarryingafamiliarlookingwhitebox.OhGod.

“OfcourseIicedthem.Andtheyhavebeensellinglikecrazytooalongwitheverythingelsetoday.

We’vebeenslammed.”HeplacestheboxonthecounterinfrontofmeandIswallowloudly.“Butwho

givesashitaboutcupcakesoranythingediblerightnow.Youhavenoideahowhardithasbeentonot

openthis.”Hepushesitclosertome.“Nowgettoit.”

MyheartbeginsbeatingsohardinmychestIthinkforsureitwillcrackmysternum.“Maybelater.”

Ipushitawayfrommeeasily.Hmm.Definitelynotflour.

“Fuckthatnoise.Sinceyouaren’tgoingtofreelytellmewhyyoucouldn’tgetanysleeplastnight,

whichI’mjustgoingtoassumewasbecauseacertainsomeonewasonyourmind,youwillopenthisright

now.”Hepushesitbackinfrontofmeandpullstheribbon.

“Samedeliveryguy?”Iaskandhenods.NotthatIreallyhadanydoubt.Placingmyhalfeaten

muffindown,Iopenthebox,grabbingthebrowncardthatislyingontopofthetissue.

“Readitoutloud,”hesquawks.

“No.Whatifhe’sconfessingtoamurder?Iwouldhateforyoutobeanaccessory.”Joeymumbles

somethingunderhisbreathasIunfoldthenoteandstepback,givingmyselftheallusionofprivacy.

Dylan,

NexttimeIgotoAgentProvocateurtoreplacesomethingofyours,youwillbeaccompanyingme.

XReese

“Fuckme.”IthrowthecardatJoeyandrifflethroughthetissuepaper,slowlypullingoutthepairof

purplelacypantieswiththetinyribbonsonthesides.

Heslamshishanddownonthecounter.“JesusFuckingChrist.Heboughtyoupanties?”

“Yeah.Imean,hetooktheonesfromtheweddingandIjokinglytoldhimhehadtobuymea

replacementpair.”Istareatthepanties,myfaceinstantlyheatingupattherealizationthatReeseactually

wentlingerieshoppingforme.Christ,thisisseriouslyhot.“Iwastotallykiddingthough.”

Joeyre-readsthenoteseveraltimesbeforeheturnstome,fanninghisfacewiththecard.“Thishas

tobethehottestnoteI’veeverread.Like,Icouldseriouslyhaveanorgasmfromreadingthis.”Hismouth

dropsopenandhestepsclosertome,admiringthepantiesinmyhand.“Waitaminute,whatdoyoumean

hekeptyourpantiesfromthewedding?Youwenthomewithoutpanties?”

Isnatchthenotebackandslipitintomypocket.“Ohholdoffonthejudgmentplease.Likeyou

haven’tgonewithoutyourdelicatesbefore.”HelookstowardstheceilingforamemoryandsmilesasI

laughathim.“Shit,Joey.Howhotisthis?”

“Wickedlyhot.SweetLord,youneedtofuckhimagainandfastbeforeIdrughimanddraghim

overtomyside.”Ilaughuntilmysidehurtsandamonlyinterruptedwhentheshopphonerings.

“Dylan’sSweetTooth.”IgiggleintothephoneasJoeystudiesmypantieslikeaweirdo.“Give

thoseback,youperv,”Iwhisperawayfromthephone.

“Dylan?”

MybackstraightensandIalmostdropthephone.Iknowthatvoice.Clearingmythroatand

pretendingIdidn’t,Ianswerafterabeat.“Yes,thisisDylan.”

“It’sReese.”

“Oh,hi.”IswatatJoeytogethisattentionandmouthit’shim.Hedropsmypantiesonthecounter

andquicklysnatchesthephoneawayfromme.What?No!

“Reese.Youstudyou.Mygirlisdyingforyoutoimpregnateher.”

“GIVEMETHEPHONE.”

HegrinsandnodshisheadasIjumpupandtrytosnatchit.Damnittohellhe’stall.“Yup.Shejust

openedyourpackage.Speakingofpackages,justhowbigisyourdick?Asmemorableasshesays?”Iam

goingtokillhim.Slowly.

Grabbingthephoneoutofhishand,IpunchhimashardasIcaninhisshoulderashelaughsatme.

“Asshole.Shit,myhand.You’refuckingdead,Holt.”Ishakemyhandintheairandbringthephoneupto

myear.“Hello?”Isaythroughawinceofpain.OhGod.Pleasetellmehedidn’thearanyofthat.

“Hi,love.What’sthisaboutyouwantingtocarrymychildren?”Icanhearthesmileinhisvoice;

obviouslyenjoyinghimselfimmensely.I,ontheotherhand,wanttohurlmyselfintotraffic.

“Sorry.Joeydrinks.”Thisismortifying.“CanIhelpyouwithsomething?”

“Isyourhandokay?”

AcustomerwalksthroughthedoorandJoeygetstoworkhelpingher.Afterflippinghimoff,I

watchhimgiggleatmeasIslipintothebackforsomemuchneededprivacy.“Yes,it’sfine,Ithink.”

Makingafisttostretchitout,Ismileatmynextmove.Hesendsmeanaughtynote;he’sgoingtoget

naughtyDylan.“How’syourhand?”

“Myhand?Andwhywouldsomethingbewrongwithmyhand,sweetDylan?”

Isigh.SweetDylan.Lordhelpmethisguyissmooth.“Well,Ijustassumedyoujerkedoff

repeatedlyattheimageofmeineachandeveryiteminthatstoretoday.Infact,I’mcountingonit.”The

soundofcoughingcomesthroughthephoneandIchuckle.“Sotellme,whyexactlywouldIaccompany

youtoAgentProvocateur?I’mthereenoughasitis.”

Afterabriefmomentofjusthisbreathinginmyearwhichismakingthehaironmyneckstandup,

hespeaks.“Doyouownanygarters?”Hisvoiceislowandtaunt.Christ,hesoundsseductiveevenat

work.

IcanfeelmypulsehammeringinmyneckasIbitemybottomlip.“Maybe,why?”

“Wearonetonight.”

Tonight?

I’mgoingoutfordrinkswithJoeyandJulstonight.Ofcourse,whereJulsgoes,Ian

goes.AndIanmusthavetoldReese.Isuddenlycouldn’twaitfordrinks.

“Youknowthosecostaprettypenny,don’tyou?Iwouldhatetolosesuchanexpensiveitemof

clothingwhenyoudecidetostealit.”EventhoughIwouldn’tminditentirely.Hecanconfiscateevery

articleofclothingIhaveforallIcare.

“Whosaidanythingaboutyoutakingitoff?”

Igriptheworkbenchandclosemyeyes,suddenlyfeelinglikeIcouldcombust.

“Reese.”

“Dylan.”

Iglancedownatmyshirt,myarousednippleshighlyvisiblenow.Imoansoftlyintothephone

beforeIanswerinawhisper,“I’msowetrightnow.”

AloudcrackringsthroughthereceiverandIknowhe’sdroppedit.Ah,sweetvictory.

“Areyouserious?”hemurmursandIchuckleathisresponse.“Shit.Youcan’ttellmethatwhenI’m

stuckatwork.”

Irunmyhandupandaroundmyneck,feelingtheclamminessofmyskin.“WellIam.Thatvoiceof

yoursdoesthattome.”

JoeypopshisheadthroughthedoorwayandIimmediatelyfreeze.“Cupcake,weneedmore

éclairs.”

Inodquickly,eyeswideasJoey’sgringetsbigger.“IguessI’llseeyoulaterthen?”Iask,moving

towardsthepastryrack.IknowmyfaceisbeetredandfeellikeI’vejustbeencaughtmasturbating.Shit,I

practicallywas.

Hebreathesheavilyintothephone.“I’mcountingonit.”Thecallends,allowingmetograbthe

containeroféclairswithbothhandsafterIplacethephonedownontheworktop.

Turningquickly,IseeJoeywatchingme,armscrossed.“Youlookallhotandbothered,”hesays

slylythroughhissmile.

“Iam.AndI’mnotsurehowIfeelaboutiteither.”

Pushingpasthim,Iwalktothedisplaycaseandfillthetrayofpastries.Heleansagainstthe

doorframe.“Whatdoesthatmean?Hewantsyou;obviously,youwanthim,again,obviously,sowhat’s

theproblemhere?”

Iclosethecase.“Noproblem.Thisisjustsex.Reallyfuckinggoodsex.So,noproblem.”Ibrush

pasthimandshakemyhead,silentlycommunicatingthatthisconversationisover.Becausethisisjust

sex.AndeventhoughI’vealwaysbeenarelationshipkindofgirl,Iammorethancapableofhandlinghot

casualsex.Right?

**

JoeyandIarrivedatTheTavernat8:30p.m.afterIspentoveranhourdebatingwhattowear.Ihad

settledonmycreamsummerdressthathuggedmycurvesinthemostsinfullywaypossible.Itbunchedin

thefront,accentuatingmycleavageandfelljustabovemyknee.Pairedwithmymatchingheelsand

feelingmygarterclingtomythighs,Ifeltsecretlysexy.Myhandsshakeaswestepthroughthedoor,Joey

leadingthewaythroughthepackedbar.IhavenoideawhyI’msonervous.I’vealreadyhadsexwiththe

guy.AndnowIknewforsurethatheenjoyeditasmuchasIdidanddidn’tregretit.Butforsomereason,

myheartispoundinginmyearsandmystomachisclenchedtight.Comeon,Dylan.Youcandothis.He

wantsyouandyousureashellwanthim.

IfollowJoeytothebarwhereJulsisperchedonastool,messingwithherphone.Withnomembers

oftheChicagomancandyclubinsight,Ibreatheasighofrelief.

“Finally.Holyhell,Dylan.Thatdress.Shit,thatmightactuallykillhim.”Shegrinswickedlyand

runshereyesdownmybody.

ItwirlquicklyasJoeywhistles.“Youbitchesannoymewithyourhotlittlefigures,”hegrumbles,

motioningforthebartender.

“Joeyisbuyingbecausehe’sashitheadwhostealsphonesoutofpeople’shands,”IsayasJulshops

downfromherstool.

“Excellent.IloveitwhenJoeyisashithead.WhiteZinfandelforme,JoJo.”

Heglaresatherandthenatme.

“Don’tyoudarelookatmelikethat.TellingReesethatIwantedtohavehisbabies.You’relucky

I’monlymakingyoubuyusdrinks.”Icockmyheadtothesideandstarehimdown.

“Ha!OhmyGod.Youwouldhavetheprettiestbabies.”Julssqueals.

“Iknow,right?”heechoes.

Irollmyeyes.“You’rebothmental.”

Julsgrabsmyhandandtugsmethroughthecrowd,stoppingatanemptytalltable.Myeyesscanthe

roomasIsettleonmystool.Iquicklytapmyfingersonthetableandbitetheinsideofmycheek.

“You’renervous,”shestatesasmyeyesmeethersacrossthetable.

“Idon’tknow,maybethisisabadidea.”

Shearchesherbrowatme.

“IfeellikeI’mtryingtoohard.Imean,I’mwearingafuckinggarterunderthisforChrist’ssake.”

“SoamI.High-five,sweets.”Ican’thelpbutgiggleathernaughtyenthusiasmasIhumorherand

slapherhand.OfcourseJulsiswearingagarter.Betweenthetwoofus,I’msurewe’veaccumulatedone

ofeveryiteminAgentProvocateur.

Joeyreturnsmomentslaterwithourdrinks.“Well,incaseBillyisanoshow,Tythebartenderis

availableformylicking.”

IgrabmydrinkandtakeasipasJulssnickers.“WhatisgoingonwithBilly?Haveyouspokento

himsincethewedding?”Iask.

Hetakesasipofhisbeerbeforeanswering.“He’stextedmeafewtimes.Youknowmethough,

alwaysgottahaveonewaitingformeinthewings.”He’sbeingevasive.Joeyisneverevasive.

“Ilovehowyouthinkthatthatanswerisgoingtosatisfyus.Andsincewhenareyoutightlipped

aboutyourhookups?”IsayasJulsnodsinagreement.

“Seriously,JoJo,whothehelldoyouthinkyou’retalkingtohere?Ihappentoknowfromavery

wellhungreliablesourcethatyouandBillysaweachotherlastnight.Andprettymucheverynightsince

thewedding.”

“Iantoldyouthat?Christ,heiswhipped.Yourpussymustbelikesomefuckingnirvanaorsome

shit.”

MymouthdropsopenasJulssmilesandshrugshershouldersplayfully.“Ohisthatright?Ithought

youweren’tsurehowyoufeltabouthimandhiscurvedpenis?”

Helooksquicklyaroundtheroomandtakesasipofhisbeer.“It’sgrowingonme.”

“Ibetitis,onyouandinyou.”Julsbarksandwefallintoafitofgigglesasherphonelightsup.

“Ooohhhthey’rehere.”Shesquealsexcitedly.

Mybackgoesrigidandmypulsebeginstorace.Asifmybodyissomehowwiredtohis,Ilookup

atthedoorwayjustashewalksthroughbehindIan.Ilistentomyheavybreathingashemoveslikeliquid

throughthecrowdofpeople.Eyesdarkandhoodedintheamberglowofthebar,hairperfectlymessedup

thatmyfingersachedtotouchandthatsexyashellmouththatisglisteningasifhejustlickedit.Good

God,heisglorioustolookat.Needingtheliquidcourage,Idownmydrinkandearnmyselfawide-eyed

lookfromJoeyasthemenwalktowardsourtable.

“Hey,babe,”JulssaysasIanwrapshisarmsaroundherback.Hesmothersherinquickkissesas

shemoanssoftlyagainsthim.

“Dylan,Joey,it’snicetoseeyouboth,”Iansays.

IraisemyglassathimasJoeydoesthesame,myeyeslockingontoReese.Hewalksaroundthe

table,hisgazeneverleavingmineashecomesandstandsnexttomystool.

“Hi.”Hisvoiceislowandsoftashishandrestsonmylowerback,claimingmeinfrontof

everyone.Yes,that’sright.I’mwithhim.Movealongladies.

“Hi,yourself.”Iturnmybodyandcrossonelegovertheother,thehemofmydressrisinguponmy

thighandquicklycatchinghisattention.Iadmirehimwhileheadmiresmylegs.He’slookingashotas

everinadressshirtandtiethatispartiallyloosenedandregardsmesweetly,withsofteyesandparted

lips.

“Youlook…”herunsahandthroughhishairandIsmile,hiseyesslowlyscanningmybody.“…I

likeyourdress.Alot.”

“Thanks.Waittillyouseewhat’sunderit.”

Steppingclosertomesothathislegisbrushingagainstmine,heslowlytrailshishandupmythigh

underthetableandstopsatthemetalclipsofmygarter.Hisneckpulsesasheswallowsandslideshis

handbackout,pullingdownmydress.

“Peryourrequest,”Isayashislipcurlsupinthecorner.

“So,Dylan,how’sthebakerybusinessgoing?Thatweddingcakeyoumadewasreallyfucking

good,right,Joey?Didn’tyouhavelikesixpieces?”IansaysashestealsJuls’stoolbeforepullingher

intohislap.Sherunsherfingersalonghiscollar,blissfullyoblivioustoanyonebuthim.

“Whatever.IburneditofflaterwithBilly.”

“Well,I’mgladyouguysgottoenjoythecakesinceIdidn’t.Iwasabitpreoccupiedwithmyown

drama.”MyeyesquicklyflicktoReesewhoiswatchingme,studyingmewithasmallsmile.Igivehima

quickwinkbeforeIturnbacktoIan.“Butyeah,businessisgood.Busyasweusuallyareinthesummer.I

thinkIhaveaweddingeveryweekendtobakeforuntilSeptember.”

“Yeah,we’recrazybusy.Andwhenshe’snotwhippingupweddingcakes,she’sfloatingoncloud

ninealloverthatdamnshopfromthelovenotesanddeliveriesshe’sbeenreceiving.”Joeysighs

dramaticallyasItenseinmyseat.“It’sallveryromantic.”

Reese’shandmovesonmyback,histhumbrubbingthematerialofmydress.

Iquicklyshovemychattyfriendandspillsomeofhisbeeronthetable.“RemindmewhyIhired

youasmyassistant?”

“BecauseI’mgorgeousandcansellanythingtoanyone,”herepliesplayfully.

“Please,yousaythatlikemytreatsdon’tsellthemselves.”Itwirlmyiceinmyglass.“Ifanything,

you’remoreofaliabilitytohavearound.Justhowmanysexualharassmentsuitsarependingagainstyou

thismonth?”Notthathereallyhadany,butitwouldn’tsurprisemethewayJoeyflirteddailywith

customers.HerollshiseyesasJulsgigglesagainstIan.

“JesusChrist.Youtwofightlikeyou’remarried,”Billysaysashereturnstothetablewiththree

beers,passingtwoofthemtoIanandReese.

“Wepracticallyare,andbeforeyouask,I’mthemanintherelationship,”Ireply,suckingonanice

cubebeforedroppingitbackintomyglass.ReeselaughsquietlynexttomeandIglanceupathim,

meetinghisstare.

“Baby,doyouhearwhatIhavetoputupwithdaily?TellDylantobenicetome.”Joeystrokes

Billy’sarmandIseemyopportunity.

“Hey,Joey,wouldyoulikemetogetyouanythingfromthebar?Anotherbeer,somefood,your

ballsmaybe?”JulsslamsherhanddownonthetableandlaughsasBilly’sfacelightsup.IanandReese

bothchuckleasJoeyglaresatme.

“Bitch,”hemurmurs.

“Anyways---,”BillystretchesoutbeforehiseyesflashtoReeseandthenquicklytomine.“---

Reesetellsmeyouthoughthewasmarried.That’sprobablythefunniestthingI’veheardallyear.”

“Fuckoff,”Reesemuttersagainsthisglass.

BillychucklesandsweetlyrubsJoey’sarm.“Ohcomeon.You?Tieddown?”Billy’seyesshift

fromReesetomineafterIregisterReese’sslightheadshake.“Itwasevenfunnierwhenweheardthatyou

slappedtheshitoutofhimforit.”

“Shityeahitwas,”IanchimesinandkissesJulsquicklyonthecheek.“Iwould’vepaidtoseethat.”

IshrugandglanceupatReesewhoseemstobethinkingofsomething,hiseyesstaringoffpastthetable.

“Youshouldhaveseenhowpissedshewasintheshop.Iactuallythoughtshewasgoingtoreturn

backtoworkwithyourballsinherpurse,”JoeydirectstowardsReeseandIshiftinmychair,feelinghis

eyesonmeasIslowlyglanceupandmeetthem.

“Well,IhappentobeveryfondofmytesticlessoI’mgladthatshitgotclearedup.”Helooks

aroundateveryonebeforedroppinghiseyesbacktomine.Leaningin,heholdsmyneckwithonehand

andwhispersintomyhair,“Comehomewithme.”

Ishakemyheadslowlyandsmile,glancingquicklyaroundthetable.JoeyandBillyarenowin

deepconversationastheybothwalktowardsthebartogetherandJulsisstraddlingIan’slap.Sweet

Jesus,getaroomisright.MygazegoesbacktoReese.Hiseyesnarrowashepicksupmyglassand

slipsanicecubeinhismouth,slowlysuckingonitandmakingmyskintingle.Iswallowloudly.

“Whynot?Iwanttotakeyoutobed,immediately.”

Iblinkslowly,suddenlyfeelingdrunkfromhisvoiceandtheintensitybehindit.“Nobeds,”Isay

flatly,seeinghisexpressionshifttocuriosity.Iexplainmyself.“Bedsareintimate.Andwe’rejusthaving

fun.Keepingitcasual.Right?”

Hestudiesmeasheplacesmyemptydrinkdown.“Ofcourse.”

“SexinbedsleadstosleepoversandIthinkitwouldbebetterformeifwedidn’ttakeitthere.”

Thishadtobesaid.IfIwasgoingtoattempttojusthavecasualsexwithReese,Icouldn’tdoanything

thatwouldleadtomegettingattached.I’malreadylosingsleepoverthemanandwebarelyknoweach

other.

“AreyoutellingmethatI’mrestrictedtofuckingyouinpublicplacesonly?”

“Yousaythatlikeit’sabadthing.”

“No,love,fuckingyouanywherecouldneverbeabadthing.Iwasjustdeadsetongettingyourhot

littleassinmybed.”Hiseyesburnintomineashishandlightlytrailsdownmyshoulder.

Ismoothhistiedownashisfingerslightlytrickledownmyarm.“Ijustthinkthisishowitneedsto

be.Besides,I’msurethereareatleastahandfulofhardsurfacesinherethatyou’vealreadythoughtabout

throwingmeupagainst.”

HisinfectiouslaughpullsmeinandIjoinhim.“Yes,you’rerightaboutthat.”Hishandholdsthe

sideofmyfaceandheleansin,brushinghislipssoftlyagainstminebeforepullingbackaninch.“ButI

wanttogetyounakedandI’dpreferitifIdiditwithoutanaudience.Areyouopposedtofuckingin

vehicles?”

Afterswipingmytongueacrossmyliptotastehim,Igrabmypurseandstandup.“Notatall.Lead

theway,handsome.”

WesayourgoodbyestoJulsandIanwhopayuslittleattention.They’repracticallyhavingsexat

thetablenowanywayandcouldn’tcarelesswhatwedo.Hegrabsmyhandandpullsmethroughthebar

andoutthedoor,leadingmedownthesidewalkandstoppinginfrontofavehiclethatmakesmyjawhit

thepavement.

“Holyshit.YoudriveaRangeRover?”Iaskashepullshiskeysoutandhitstheunlockbutton.

“Yes.Isthatokay?”

“Don’tthesethingscostlikeninetygrand?”Myeyesrakeoverthecarwithamazement.

Helaughsandopensthebackdoor.“Somethinglikethat.”

IsquealasI’mliftedoffmyfeetandpushedintothebackseat.Reeseslidesinbehindmeand

closesthedoor.Pullingmeintohislap,Istraddlehiswaistashishandsslidedownmysidesandhold

tightlyontomyhips.HisthumbspressagainstthefrontofmypelvisandIfeelmycoreconstrict.

“AreyousureIcan’tconvinceyoutoletmetakeyoutomyplace?Iwanttoslowlydevouryouand

Ifeellikethisvenuewon’tallowmetoappreciateitasmuch.”

Ilaughagainsthismouth,slowlylickinghisbottomlipuntilheopensformeandtangleshistongue

withmine.Christ,Iforgothowgoodhewasatthis.Justkissing.

Isomehowmanagetobreakawayforasecond.“Mmm,devourme,huh?”

Henods,tiltingmyheadupwithhishandandkissingdownmyneck.Myhemishikedupwithhis

otherhandandhisfingersgrazemystockingswheretheymeetmygarter.

“Wouldyoubeabletodevourmeonacouch?”

HepullsbackandIdropmyhead.“Couchesaren’tintimate?”

“No,notatall.AndIwanttobedevouredonyours.Slowly.”Hisforeheadisrestingagainstmine

andwe’rebothpanting.I’vegivenineasilytotheideaofgoinghomewithhim,reallyeasily.But

honestly,thismancouldconvincemetodoanythingatthispoint.I’mfairlycertainthatifheaskedmeto

commitamajorfelonywithhim,IwoulddoitwillinglyandwiththesamefuckingsmilethatI’mwearing

now.

Hiseyeswidenandheslidesmeoffhislap.“Fuckyes.Let’sgo,love.”

Six

StandinginanelevatorwithReeseCarrollinamassivebuildingfullofluxuriouscondosisoneof

themostsurrealmomentsofmylifesofar.Ican’tbelievewhatIamdoing,orwhatIamabouttodowith

thisman.Well,Imean,ofcourseIknewgoingouttonightwasgoingtoleadtosexwithhim,butIhad

firmlydecidedonnotleavingwithhim.IfiguredwewouldsneakoffintothebathroomatTheTavernor

intoadarkandsecludedcornertohumplikerabbits.ButhereIam,ridingtheelevatorofhisbuildingto

thetenthfloorwithhimwatchingmefromacrossthesmallspace.It’stakingeveryounceofself-controlto

notdroptomykneesonthispristinemarblefloorandsuckhimoffrighthereandnow.Ifeelgreeneyes

onmeasIstareaheadatthenumbersonthepanel,lovingthefactthathehasn’tstoppedlookingatme

sincewegotoutofhiscar.

“Seesomethingyoulike?”Iaskplayfullyasheleansagainstthemirroredwall.

“Very.Butwhyareyoustandingsofarawayfromme?AfraidImightviolateyoubeforeweeven

gettomycouch?”

Iswallowloudly.Violateme?Yes,anytime.TheelevatorpingsandthedoorsopenbeforeIhavea

chancetoanswer.

We’rebarelyinthedoorofhiscondowhenit’skickedclosedbehindusandI’mbeingpinned

againstthewall.Hismouthishotandneedyagainstmine,suckingandtastingeverydipandcornerasour

tonguesmovetogether.Igripthebackofhisheadandpullhistongueintomymouthandsuckitslowly,

drawingalonggroanfromhispartedlips.Hishandsmoveovereveryinchofmybackanddowntothe

hemofmydress.

“Takeitoff,”heordersashegripsmyhipsandmovesbackwards,leadingmeoutoftheentryway

andintoagiantlivingroom.Myeyeswidenatthesightofit.

“Whoa.Yourplaceisreallynice.”Iquicklyglanceallaroundme.We’vestoppedinfrontofalong

blackleathersofathatfacesafireplacewithagianttelevisionmountedonthewall.

“Dylan,takethedressoff.”

Ismileandlookupathimfromundermylashes,slowlyturningaroundandgatheringmyhairover

oneshoulder.“Unzipmeplease.”Startlingabitatthetouchofhishandsonmybareshoulders,hekeeps

onetherewhiletheotherslowlypullsthemetalzipperdownmyspine,stoppingjustabovemybackside.

“Thankyou,”IsaysoftlyasIstayfacingawayfromhimandpullmyarmsoutofthesleeves,letting

itdroptothefloorandhearingasharpinhaleofbreathfrombehindme.Andthisiswhygarterswere

invented.Ismilewithouthimknowing.

“Holyshit.Turnaround.”MmmIlikedbossyReese.

Takingalittlelongerthanheprobablywouldhaveliked,Iturnonmyheelsandstepoutofmy

dress,standingdirectlyinfrontofhiminmycreamcoloredlacybra,matchingpantiesandgarter,andmy

sheerstockings.Hischestismovingrapidlyinsidehisshirtasheslowlytrailsdownmybodywithhis

eyesandevenmoreslowlybackuptomyface.Iseehisadam’sapplerollinhisthroat.

“Begentle,”Iwhisper,andforabriefmoment,somethingflashesinhiseyes.SomethingthatI

thoughtI’dbeenfeelinganddidn’tthinkhecouldsee.Ishenervous?

“You’resofuckingbeautiful,”hesays.Imeltonthespot.Nomanhasevercalledmebeautiful

before.Sexy,hot,Ievengotgoodenoughtoeatonetime.Butneverbeautiful.Shit,whydidhehaveto

saythat?Hestepsintomeandwrapshisarmaroundmywaist,pullingmeagainsthischestasheslowly

lowersmedownontothecouch.

“Oh!”Iyelpatthecoldleatherasittouchesmybareskin.

Kneelingnexttomeonthefloor,hegrabsmyonelegandhooksitoverthebackofthecouchand

bringstheoneclosesttohimuptorestoverhisshoulder.Ibegintoshakeagainsthim,knowingexactly

what’scoming.Hetrailslightkissesupmyinnerthigh.“I’vebeendyingtotasteyouagain.It’sallI’ve

thoughtabout.”Hemovestomyotherthighandrepeatstheaction,causingmetotremble.“Youhaveme

sofuckingwounduphere,Dylan.YouwillcomeinmymouthseveraltimesbeforeIfuckyou.”

“Jesus,youkeeptalkinglikethatandI’mgonnacomebeforeyoutouchme.”Mybodyarches

towardshismouthashelaughsagainstmyskin.Iknowhe’sright.Iknowhewillbringmemultiple

orgasmstonightbecausehe’sthatgood.HishotbreathwarmsmeagainstmypantiesandImoan,feeling

hisfingerslidethethinsheermaterialtothesideeversogently.

“Oh.”Igroanloudly.

Hisfirstlickisslowandlingering,endingwithasharpflickofmyclitandcausinganinvoluntary

trembleofmybodyagainsthismouth.Throwingmyhandsovermyheadanddiggingintothearmrest,I

lookdownmybodyandmeethiseyes.Histonguelicksinbetweeneveryfoldandswirlsaroundand

insideofme.

“OhmyGod,you’resogoodatthat.”Mychestisrisingandfallingrapidly,mystomachclenchedas

heworksme.I’veneverhadoralsexfeellikethis,notevenclosetothis.Astrongurgebeginsslowly

buildinginmygutashebrusheshardagainstmyclitandpullsitintohismouth,suckingrelentlessly.

“Feelit,Dylan.FeelwhatIcandotoyou.”Dartinghistongueinsidemeandfuckingmewithit,my

legthatishookedoverthecouchbeginstoslipasIbuckagainsthim.Hishanddartsoutandpushesit

backover,leavingmewideopenforhimtoexpertlyexplorewithhismouth.

“OhGod.”Icryout,tighteningeverymuscleinmybody.

Twofingerstaketheplaceofhistongueashelicksabovehishand,givingextraattentiontomy

swollennub.Hemovesslowly,stretchingmewithhisfingersasIbeginrollingmyhipsagainsthisface.

Myorgasmhitshardandfast,sendingmespinningoffintoorbitasIscreamhisnameandreachdownto

holdhimrightwhereIneedhim.

“Mmm.”Hemoansagainstmeandthevibrationshootsupmybodyandhitseverynerve.His

fingersslowtheirtortureashecontinueslickingme,bringingmedownslowlybutnotquiteenoughto

easethethrobbing.

“OhGod.Reese,please.”

Iknewthatbegginghimtostopwasofnouse.Plus,didIreallywanthimtostop?I’veneverhadan

orgasmfromaguy’smouthonmebeforeandIknewmynextonewasn’tfarbehind.Imoanloudlyand

bitemylipasheglidesonehandupmybody,massagingmybreastashelicksbetweenmylegs.

“Youtasteamazing.Icoulddothisfordays,love.”

Igroanandarchawayfromthecouch,hishandsliftingmyassintotheair.“Don’tstop.”Myskin

ignitesandthefirethathadbeenbarelydousedcomesroaringbacktolifeinsideme.Theonlypartsofmy

bodytouchingthecouchnowaremyshouldersandmyhead.Reeseissupportingeverythingelseashe

moveshisfingersquickly,slippingathirdoneinsideandpushingwiththeperfectamountofpressure

againstmyclitwithhisthumb.HismouthnibblesonthetenderskinofmythighandIcryout.

“Reese.OhmyGod.”

“Giveittome,Dylan,”hegrowls.

Icomeagainandit’sevendeeperthanmylastone.Thelegthatishungoverthecouchisnow

restingonhisothershoulderandIgripmythighstightagainsthishead.Hesucksonmyclitandridesout

myorgasmwithme,finallyallowingmetotouchbackdownaftermytremblingstops.Slippingmylegs

offhisshoulders,heplacesthemgentlyonthecouchandthistime,thecoldleatherfeelswelcomingonmy

nowglisteningskin.

“Thatwas…thatrightthere…was…”Ihavenowords.Nowordshavebeeninventedtodescribe

that.MybreathingissostrainedthatIcanbarelyspeakevenifIdidhavethewords.Iopenmyeyesand

seehimstandingnexttothecouch,slowlypullingathistiewithhisamusedexpression.

“Epic?”

Iquicklyswingmylegsoverthesideandstandup,mywobblyorgasmiclegscausingmetostumble

againsthimandintohisarms.“Jesus,you’verenderedmecrippled.”

“Liebackdown.I’mnowhereneardonewithyou,love.”

Islowlyraisemyeyestohisandlickmylips.“Ifigured,butIwanttoundressyou.”

Hearchesaneyebrowandlicksmyarousaloffhislipsasheholdshisarmsouttome.Istepoutof

myheelsanddropdownafewinches,thetopofmyheadnowfallingjustbelowhisnose.Reachingup

slowly,Ipullathistieandslideitofffromaroundhiscollar,droppingitatmyfeet.

“I’vebeendyingtoseeyounaked.It’sallI’vethoughtabout,”Isayasmyfingersbeginworkingat

thebuttonsonhisdressshirt.“You’rewearingwaytoomanyclothesforme.”I’mfumblingnervously,the

anticipationofgettinghisclothesoffcausingmetofidgetabitbutIdon’tcare.Ifocusinonmytask.

“Yeah,Iknowthefeeling.Youlookincredible,butIcan’twaittogetyououtofthat.”

Iglanceupathimfromundermylashesandpartmylips,seeinghiseyesonmychest.Ihaven’t

thoughtaboutthefactthathehasn’tseenmenakedyet.I’mstillwearingeverythingIhadputonearlier

underneathmydress.Bringingonehandbehindmyback,Iquicklyunhookmybrawhiletheotherstays

firmlyplantedonhischest.Islowlyslideitdownmyarmsandletitdroptothefloor,hearingasoftmoan

escapehim.Myheavybreastsbobfreelyandtingleintheanticipationofhisbodyonthem.Hebringshis

handsupandrakesthemthroughhishair.“Problem?”Iask,continuingtheunbuttoningofhisshirt.

Heshakeshishead,hiseyeslingeringonmychest.“No,noproblem.Thosecouldneverbea

problem.”

Ismileandpushhisshirtoverhisshouldersanddownhisarms,reachingquicklyforthebottomof

hisT-shirtandpullitoverhishead.Holyshit.MybreathingpicksupasIrunmyhandsoverthesharp

outlineofhischestanddowntohisabs,tracingthelinesofhissix-pack.Oreightpack?Jesus.Never

haveIeverseenortouchedabodylikethis.He’shardanddefinedbuthisskinissmoothandittensesasI

grazeovereveryinchofit.

“You’resobeautiful,”Isaysoftly,lickingmylipsasIbegintuggingathisbelt.Asoftlaughcauses

metolookup.

“CanIpleasebesomethingalittlemoremanly?Beautifulshouldonlybereservedforyou.”He

brushesthebackofhishandsupmystomachandtrailstheundersideofmybreasts.

“Handsomethen?Superblyhandsome?”Ismileupathimandhenods,thecornerofhislipscurling

up.

Histhumbsrunovermyerectnipples.Fucktheslowtouching.Ineededhimnow.Myfingers

springtolifeandIunbuttonandunziphimquickly,pushinghispantsandboxersdownandstaggerbackat

thesightofhiserection.Yup,justasmassiveasIremembered.Acrazythoughtentersmymindashepulls

hisshoesandsocksoff,steppingoutofhispants.Notcrazy,fuckinginsane.ButbeforeIcanthinkwhere

thehellthisthoughtcamefrom,mymouthopens.

“I’mnotsleepingwithanybodyelse,”Isayquickly,myeyesrunningoverhisnakedbody.Hiswaist

isnarrow,theprominentVstaringmerightintheface.Longmuscularlegsrunonformiles.Evenhisfeet

areperfect.Jesus,hisbodyisdeadly.Iglanceupathimandseehisexpression.He’swatchingme,

studyingme.“Ijust,Iknowthatthisisjustsexandnothingelse,butI’mnotgoingtobesleepingwith

anyonebutyou.”I’mtalkingsofast,I’munsureifhe’scatchinganyofwhatI’msaying.Wherethefuckis

thiscomingfrom?“Iwanttobemonogamouslycasual,orcasuallymonogamous.Fuck,isthatevena

saying?Idon’tknow.Wedon’thavetobe.Imean,ifyouwanttosleepwithotherwomen,thenthat’sfine.

Butifyoudon’t---”

“Dylan.”

“I’msorry.”IcovermyfaceandfeelcompletelymortifiedbutIdon’tstop.It’slikewordvomitat

thispoint.“It’sjust,Iwanttofeelyou.Justyou.I’veneverdoneitwithoutacondombeforeandI’m

clean.I’veonlybeenwithoneotherguyandwealwaysusedprotection.AndI’vebeenonbirthcontrol

foryears.”FuckinghellI’manidiot.“Christ,nevermind.ForgetIsaidanything.I’llgograbacondom

outofmypurse.”IdropmyhandsandturntowalktowardstheentrywaywhereIdroppedmypurseinthe

heatofpassion.Hishandgripsmywristandstopsme.

“Whyareyousonervousallofasudden?We’vealreadyhadsexandyou’vehadtwoorgasms

tonightalready.Youshouldbecompletelyrelaxedwithme.”

Ilookanywherebuthisface.Hischestisyearningtobetouched,hisbroadshoulders,andhiscut

arms.Ifeelhishandonmychinasheliftsittomeethiseyes.“Idon’tknow,you’renaked.”Imotionto

thewonderthatstandsbeforeme.Histightbodyisdefinitelymakingmybrainscramble.“I’mhaving

troublethinkingstraight.”

Hemuffleshislaugh.“Relax.Iwassleepingwithsomeoneelseupuntilthewedding,butIendedit.

Itwasn’tseriousanyway.Idon’tusuallydoserious.”Okay,thatmadesense.“Ithinkmonogamously

casualisasaying,andifthat’swhatyouwanttobethenthat’swhatwe’llbe.”HepausesandIstep

closertohim,grantinghimaccesstomybody.Hesnakeshisarmsaroundmywaistandholdsmeagainst

him,skintoskin.Thesensationwarmsmeinstantly.“AndI’vealwaysusedcondoms.Always.Ifthisis

whatyouwantandyou’resure---”

Ibrushmylipslightlyagainsthis,cuttinghimoffmid-sentence.“Itcan’tjustbewhatIwant.Ifyou

don’t---”

“Dylan,ofcourseIwantittoo.DoyouthinkIhaven’tthoughtaboutit?”Hishandcomesupand

strokesmycheekasItracetheoutlineofhischest.HisfaceiscompletelyseriousandI’msuddenly

gratefulformyextremecaseofmouthdiarrhea.

“Okay.”Istepbackoutofhisarmsandhookingmyfingersintomypanties.Iwatchhimwatchme

slowlypullthemdownmylegsandstepoutofthem,leavingmestandinginonlymygarterandstockings.

Ifit’sevenpossible,hegetsharder.Myeyesbulgeinmyheadashesitsdownonthecouch,pullingme

towardshim.OhGod,hewantsmeontop?Islowly,almosthesitantlystraddlehiswaistashewatches

me,hiseyesneverleavingmine.Ibracemyselfonmyknees.“Umm,I’mnotusedtodoingitthisway.I

don’treallyknowifI’llbegoodatitlikethis.”

Thecornerofhismouthtwitches.“Youcan’tbebadatit,love.”Hisbighandscupmybreastsand

begintoslowlykneadthem,mynipplesscratchingagainsthisroughpalms.Movingcloserandrelaxing

downabit,Igaspwhenhebrushesupagainstme,rubbingmeinthemostperfectwayimaginable.He

moanssoftly.“See,whateverfeelsgoodforyouwillsureashellfeelgoodforme.”

“Oh.OHwow.”IgroanasImoveagainsthim,upanddowninmywetnessashishandsslidedown

mysidesandgripmyhips.Hecontrolsmymovements,notallowingmetospeedupwhenIwanttoor

hoveroverhimtoallowhimtopenetrateme.Igriphisheadbetweenmyhandsandlockeyeswithhimas

mybodyrespondstohis.

“Reese,Ineedyou.”

“Mmmm,Iloveitwhenyousaythat.”Hecloseshiseyestightly,alowgrowlemanatingfromhis

throatbeforeheopensthemagain.“Fuck,youfeelincredibleagainstme.Canyoucomethisway?”He

slowlytrailskissesalongmyjaw.

IknewIcould.Thisfeltalmostasamazingashismouthonme.HeisunbelievablyhardandI’m

completelydrenched.Plusatthisangle,ourfacesareinchesapartandIcanseejusthowmuchheis

enjoyingthis.Softdeepgroansescapinghisslightlypartedlipsandhisforeheadisglisteningwithsweat.

IgroanbeforeIanswer.“Yes,butIwantyouinme.Please,pleaseletmefuckyou.”

Hemovesinandpullsmybottomlipintohismouth,urgentlyswipinghistongueagainstmine.He

tasteslikeme,likemyorgasm,andit’ssurprisinglyhot.ImoanandputeverythingIhaveintothiskiss.I

can’tgetenough.HismouthcanpleaseeveryinchofmybodyandIwanttosurrendertohimcompletely.

Shit,atthisrate,Ishouldjustsigntherightstomybodyovertohimnowandbedonewithit.Noother

manwillevermakemefeellikethis.MythighsshakeagainsthisandImovequicker,glidingupand

downagainsthislengththatisnowsoakedfromme.Myhandsgriphishead,tanglinginhishairasmy

bodybeginstopulseagainsthis.

“PleaseIneedyou.”

Ashisonehandholdsmyhiptightly,hisfingersdiggingintomyskin,hepositionshimselfunderme

anddriveshishipsupandintomine.Wecryouttogether.He’ssodeepinmethisway,deeperthan

anythingIhaveeverfelt.“Reese.”Igotorockforwardonhimwhenhisgriponmetightens.

“Shit,don’tmove.”Hecloseshiseyesanddropshisheadbackontothecouch.Istarewide-eyedas

hisadam’sapplerollsinhisneck,theveinsalongthesidespulsingagainsthisskin.

Ohcrap.Whathappened?

“Isitokay?Imean,doesitfeelokay?”I’msuddenlywonderingifI’m

completelyscrewingthisupandwaythehelloutofmyelement.Butit’sajustifiedquestion.Ireallyhave

noideawhatI’mdoinghere.

Hetiltshisheadupandlooksatmecuriously,brushingmyhairbehindmyear.“Isitokay?I’m

strugglingtonotblowmyloadinyourightnowandyou’renotevenmoving.”MyeyeswidenandIcan’t

containmysmile.I’mmakinghimloseit.Yes!“Justgivemeaminute.”

“Okay,takeyourtime.”I’mcompletelygiddyasheresumeshisposition,closinghiseyesand

leaninghisheadback.Istayperfectlystillontopofhim,myhandsslowlytrailingdownhisnecktohis

shoulders.Moldingmyhandsagainsthim,Itakethisopportunitytofeelhiseverymuscle.Irunmypalms

downhisarmsandbackupagain,softlymassaginghisbicepsandtriceps.Skatingdownhischest,Itrace

thedefinelinesofhisabdominalsthatareclenchedtightandseemtofirmupevenmorefrommytouch.

“Thatfeelsreallygood,”hesaysasheliftshisheadandwatchesme.

“What?Youinmeormyhandsonyou?”IkeepmyeyesonhimasIrubhim,wantingtofeelevery

inchofhisskinunderneathmyhands.Itfeelsamazingtouchinghimlikethis,feelinghisbodyreacttomine

andseeinghimrelaxfrommycontact.

Hishandcomesuptomyfaceandhestrokesalongmyjaw.“Both,”hereplies,hisgreeneyes

burningintomine.

Iwinkathimasmyfingerstrailuphissidesandbacktohischest.“Whatdoesitfeellike?”

“Beinginyoulikethis?”Inodandhecontinues.“Warm,andreallysoft.”Hiseyesdropdown

betweenusandhestaresatme.There.Iswallowloudly.“ItfeelslikeIfitinyouperfectly.Nothinghas

everfeltlikethis,formeanyway.Haveyoueverfeltlikethisbefore?”

Istareathim,unabletoblinkashestudiesmyface.Whatdidhemeanbythat?Washejust

referringtothesex?Ordidhemeanjustbeingwithme?Thetwoofustogether?Shit.Hisquestionis

fuckingwithmyhead.I’vesureashellneverfeltanythinglikethis,inbothways.I’mdrawntothis

man.Theundeniabletangiblepullbetweenusiselectric.ButI’msureit’sone-sided.He’sjust

referringtothesex.

“Never.CanImovenowplease?I’mdyinghere.”I’veneverbeenontopduringsexandsuddenly

haveastrongoverpoweringdesiretodoitanddoitwell.

“Please,”heanswersashekeepsonehandonmyhip,diggingintomyskin.

Grippingontohisshoulders,Irockmyhipsforwardagainsthim,moaningloudlyasheslidesoutof

mywetness.Ipushbackandcontinueridinghim,backandforth,upanddown,bringinghimalmost

completelyoutofmebeforetakinghimbackin.

“Holyshit.Justlikethat,love.”HeclencheshisteethandrocksintomeasIdriveagainsthim,

pushinghimselfdeeperanddeeperwitheachmove.Onehandteasesandmassagesmybreastwhilethe

otherholdsmyside.“Jesus,youfeelincredible.Sofuckinggood,Dylan.”Hekeepshiseyesonmeashe

leansinandpullsmynippleintohismouth.Ithrowmyheadbackandscreamhisnameasthefeverbegins

tospreadthroughoutmybody.HesucksandbitesmeasIstillmymovements,archingmybacktogive

himfullaccesstomybreasts.Ilookdownandmeethiseyesashismouthstayslatchedaroundme,pulling

mynippleintohismouthandflickingitwithhistongue.

“Iloveyourmouth.”

Asmallsmilepullsathislipsashemovestothesideofmybreastandsuckshard,leavingavery

prominentredmarkonmypaleskin.Hiseyesstudymineforapproval.

“Dothatagain.”

Helicksovertomyotherbreastthatisnowbeingteasedwithhisfingers.Suckingontheskinjust

abovemynipple,hepullsbackafterafewsecondsandadmireshiswork.I’mmarkedbyhim,whereonly

hismouthhaspleasedmeandit’sthehottestthingI’veeverseen.He’sclaimingmybodyandI’m

willinglylettinghimhaveit.Hishandsmovetomyassandhegripsmetightly,pickingupmypace.

“Yes.Ohgod.Ohgod.”Mystomachclenchesandtwistsasmypussyaches.Heslidesonehand

aroundmywaistanddownmystomachuntilhisthumbisworkingmyclit.Myfingernailsdigintothe

leatherasherubsmeinthewaythatonlyheknowshow.I’mpulsing,shakingagainsthim.Myclimaxwas

alreadyonthebrinkbeforeIcrasheddownontopofhimandthefeelofhiminsidemewithnobarrier

andnowworkingmethewayhe’sdoingpushesmequicklyovertheedge.Ithrowmyheadbackandgive

intotherelease.“Reese.I’mcoming.”Hishandgrabsmyfaceandtiltsitdown,forcingmetolookathim.

Hiseyesburnintomine,capturingmeashegruntsloudly.

“Dylan,ohFUCK.”Ifeelhisorgasmburstinsideme,warmandlingering,andIneverwant

anythingmorethanIwanthiminthismoment.Thisisamazing.Everythingabouthimisamazing.He

pumpsonce,twice,threetimesandstills,hiseyesstayingonmineandgivingmethesatisfactionof

watchinghimcomeundone.AndthenIcollapseontopofhim,myheadhittinghischestashishandcomes

upandholdsmethere.I’veneverfeltanythinglikethat.Notevenclose.Hehasofficiallyruinedallother

menformeandIamperfectlyfinewiththat.

Seven

Iwaswrecked,ruined,andcompletelyokaywithit.IstayedinReese’sarmsafterweboth

climaxedforwhatseemedlikehours.Heheldme,neveraskingmetomoveorshiftinanyway.Icould

feelhimslowlygettinghardagaininsidemebuthedidn’tpushforustodoitagain.Heseemedascontent

asIwasjustsoftlystrokingmybackasmyheadnuzzledintohisneck.Irelishedinhisscent,thesmellof

himaftersex.Hestillsmelledlikecitrus,butitwasmixedwithsweatandIknewrightthenthatnothing

wouldeversmellthatgood.Orfeelthisgood.WhichIhatedmyselfforthinking.HisairwastheonlyairI

wantedtobreathenowanditdidmenogoodtothinklikethat.ButIcouldn’thelpit.Iwasofficially

screwedandIknewit.

Wespentanhouronthecouchtogether,laughingandtalkingasheheldmeagainsthim.Ifeltterribly

embarrassedfornotknowingminordetailsaboutthemanthatbroughtmethemostpleasureI’dever

experienced.Likethefactthathewasthirty-oneyearsold.Hegrewupinsouthsideandgraduatedfrom

theUniversityofChicagowhenhewastwenty-sixwithaBachelorofScienceDegreeinAccountingand

aMaster’sinBusinessAdministration.Hemadepartnerwhenhewastwenty-eightwhichsoundedlikea

majorfeatforsomeonesoyoung.Themanwasassmartashewasattractive,andIfeltcompletely

relaxedlisteningtohimtalkaboutcollegeandhisfamily.HehadayoungersisterwholivedinDetroit

whowasmarriedwithtwokids,andhisparentswerestillmarriedafterthirty-eightyearsandlivedin

Maywood.Itoldhimaboutmyparentsandhowtheyencouragedmetoopenmybakery.Beinganonly

child,theywereimmenselyproudofmeandspokeofmelikeIhadinventedacureforcancerandnota

fabulouswhitechocolatetrufflerecipe.WetalkedabouthowcloseIwaswithJulsandJoey,andhow

JulsandIanwerepracticallylivingtogethernow.Inseparableandmadforeachother.Itoldhimaboutmy

morningrunsandhowmostdaysIwishedthatIhadanIPodtodrownoutJoey’sbitchyrants,butother

daysIenjoyedthem.

Itwasanamazingnightandnotjustbecauseofthesex.I’dneverenjoyedjusttalkingwithsomeone

thewayIdidwithReese.Ididn’twanttomoveatall.IcouldhavestayedinhisarmsallnightbutIknew

Ishouldn’t.Nosleepovers.Afterafewhours,Iaskedhimtodrivemehomeandthelookonhisface

whenwepulledupinfrontofthebakerywaspriceless.HehadnoideaIlivedthere.Ofcoursehe

wouldn’tknowthat,youaren’tdating,Dylan.Ikissedhimbrieflygoodnight,wantingmorethananything

toinvitehiminsidetoseemyplacebutIdidn’t.Imanagedtobestronginthatonemoment.Thiswasjust

sexandifIwantedtokeepdoingthiswithReese,Ineededtorememberthat.

Ihadn’tseenortalkedtohimsinceouramazingfuckfestonTuesdaywhichwasmakingthings

easierandharderatthesametime.EasierbecauseIwasrealizingthathesawthisforwhatitwasandit

wasmakingmekeepmyselfincheck.Andharderbecauseapartofmedidn’twanthimtoseeitthatway

anymore.IspentalldayWednesdaystaringatmycellphone,waitingforatextoracallfromhimuntilI

stupidlyrealizedthatheneveractuallygotmynumberfromme.Theonetimehehadcalledme,he’d

calledtheshopdirectly.

Thursday,JoeyandIwereslammedwithfourconsultations,twoweddings,ananniversarycake,

andabirthdaycakerequest.Theweddingconsultationsbothtookforeverbecausethebrideshaddecided

toincludethegroomsinputsandnoonecoulddecideonanything.Luckilyforme,Joeywasgreatat

gettingpeopletocompromise,atraitthatIlovedmoreandmoreabouthimwitheachpassingwedding

consultation.AfterIhadfinishedupwithmymeetings,Ispenttherestoftheeveninginthekitchen

throwingtogetherthetartsIhadpromisedthegentlemanonMonday.Theywererelativelyeasytomake

afterIfuckedupthefirstoneroyally.Iendedupusingstrawberries,kiwi,andmangostotopthetartswith

anapricotjam.Aftermanagingtoonlyeatoneofthem,Ipassedoutinmybedanddreamedthesame

recurringReesesexdreamsthatkeptgettingbetter.Istoppedfightingit.Itwasuselessreally.Besides,the

sleepIwasnowgettingwassomeofthebestI’veevergotten.EspeciallywhenIwokeupfroman

orgasm.

**

Standingbehindthecounterat11:30a.m.onFriday,IletmymindwandertowhatReeseisdoingat

thisexactmoment.Icanpicturehimstrikinglysittingbehindhisdesk,workingonsomeauditorwhatever

anddoingitinawaythatonlyhecanmakesexy.Hishairisarightsexymess,hisgreeneyesare

narrowedinonhistask,andhismassiveerectioniswaitingforme.TheshopdooropensandIshakemy

headtoclearit.

“Somethingorsomeoneonyourmind,cupcake?Iknowthatlook.”Joeystrollsin,returningfrom

ourfavoritelittlesandwichshopdownthestreetandplacingthebagofthebestchickensaladsandwiches

inChicagoinfrontofme.MymouthbeginstowateratthesmellandIsuddenlyrealizethatallI’veeaten

thepastfewdayshasbeenpredominatelysugar.IwasgoingtodevelopdiabetesifIdidn’twatchmyself.

“No,nothingonmymindexceptforthissandwichthatI’mabouttodestroy.”Thebellonthefront

doordingsandIglanceup,myheartthumpinghardagainstmybonesatthesightofthedeliveryman.

Joeyhurriedlyscurriestomyside.“Ooohhhgoody.TodayhassuckedassandIneedsomething

romanticfrommyfavoritenumbersguy.”Thedeliverymansmilesandplacesasmallbrownenvelope

ontothecounter,handingmeasliptosignonhisclipboard.

“Yourfavoritenumbersguy?AndwhataboutBilly?”Iask,handingthemanbackhispaperworkand

staringathimsuspiciouslywhenhedoesn’texittheshop.

“He’snotanumbersguy.He’salawyer.Ahotasslawyerwhoistakingmesomeplaceuberfancy

tonight.”

“Awesome.Didyouneedsomethingelse?”Iaskthemanwhostandspatientlywaiting.

“I’vebeeninstructedtowaituntilafteryou’rereadthelettertoleave,”hestatesnonchalantly.

“Oh,okay.”IturntoJoeywholooksatmelikehehasnoideawhatisgoingoneitherasIopenthe

envelopeandpulloutasmallcard.MyheartbeginshammeringinmychestandIautomaticallyreachup

andplacemyfreehandoverit.

Dylan,

It’scometomyattentionthattheonlynumberIhaveforyouisthebakerynumber.NowhowamI

supposedtosendyoutextmessagessayingthatIwantyoutositonmyface?OrthatIcan’tstopthinking

aboutthewayitfelttobeinsideyou?ORthatIwanttoseeyousometimethisweekendifyou’refree.

Pleasebefree.

XReese

P.S.Ifyouwouldlikethesesortsofmessages,pleasegiveyournumbertoFred.

Ohman.

IsighloudlyasJoeysnatchesthenoteoutofmyhand.Findingmynotepadunderthe

counter,IbitemycheektostopfromsmilingsomuchasIscribbledownmycellnumberandhandit

directlytoFred,thedeliveryman.

“Thanks,Ms.Dylan.Haveagreatday,”hesays,turningquicklyandwalkingoutoftheshop.

“Hewantsyoutositonhisface?Well,that’sit,BillyneedstotakelessonsfromReeseonexplicit

letterwriting.”HehandsmebackthenoteandIplaceitbackinitssmallenvelope,puttingitunderthe

counterwhereI’mnowstoringtheminasmalltin.“Youknowyou’repracticallyswooningoverthere

right?”hesaystomeasIpullmyhairupintoahighmessybun.

“Swooning?Whothefucksaysswooning?Whatareyou,ninety?”Ipullafewstraypiecesoutand

tuckthembehindmyears.

Hepullshissandwichoutandhandsmemineandwestartdiggingin.“So,whatdidhemeanby

‘thewayitfelttobeinsideyou’?Imean,you’vealreadyhadsexwithhimsowhywouldhe...oh...ohmy

God.Didyoufuckhimwithoutacondom?”Hespitsbitsofchickensaladatmeasheshoutshysterically.

“Jesus.Closeyourmouth.I’dprefertonotbecoveredinyoursandwich.”Crap.Ireallydidn’t

wantJoeytoknowaboutthisbutImanagetoforgethowfuckinginsightfulheissometimes.Igrunt

loudlybeforeIanswer.“Eventhoughit’snoneofyourbusiness,yes,Idid.”Imakeafaceandwipea

hunkofmayooffmyapronthathadmanagedtohitmeinthemiddleofmyshoplogo.

Slamminghishandonthecounterfordramaticeffect,likeheneededit,hefinallyspeaksafter

chewingandswallowinghisbite.“That’sfuckinghugeandreallyfuckingserious.I’veneverevendone

that.Shit,howwasit?Goodenoughtoswearoffcondomspermanently?”HesmileswickedlyatmeasI

nodslowly.

“Withhim?Yes,absolutely.Itwasperfect.”

“Soyoutwoareofficiallyacouplenow?Fuckyes.That’swhatI’mtalkingabout,bitch.”Heholds

hishandupformetohigh-fivehimandIshakemyheadasIchewupmybite.Damnit.Thanksforthe

reminder.

“No,we’renotacouple.We’remonogamouslycasual.”Itakeanotherbiteofmytoodiefor

sandwich.

“Whatthefuckdoesthatmean?”

Iswallowmybiteandstareatmysandwich,avoidinghisjudgingstare.“Itmeanswe’renotserious

butwe’reonlysleepingwitheachother.Soit’sstillcasualandonlyaboutsex.”Ifeelasharppaininmy

chest.“Nowthatwebothhaveestablishedthatwe’llonlybewitheachotherinthatway,wedon’thave

tousecondoms.Besides,hewasmyfirstandIwashis.”Andthatpartrightthereeasesthatpain.I

glanceupathimandseehisunconvincedexpression.

“Umm,okay.Honestly,Ithinkyou’rebothdelusionalifyouthinkit’scasualforeitheroneofyou.

Youlightupwhenyoutalkaboutthisguyandhewritesyouloveletters.Fuckthecasualbullshit.”He

crumblesuphiswrapperandshootsitintothetrashcan.“Onanothernote,Ithinkit’sreallysweetthat

youwereeachother’sfirsttimeswithoutit.I’msureitmeantjustasmuchtohimasitmeanttoyou.”

Igrumbleloudly.“Shutup,it’sjustsex.Andhedoesn’twritemeloveletters.Hesendsmeflour

andpantieswithtinynotes.”

“Yeah,youkeeptellingyourselfthat.Wantsomethingtodrink?”heasks,movingtowardsthe

kitchenasmyphonebeepsinmypocket.

“Please,”Ireply,pullingitoutandseeinganunknownnumber.

Unknown:Thereyouare.NowIdon’thavetoworrysomuchabout

Fredinterceptingmyletterstoyou.

Ismileandtypefrantically.

Me:HereIam.AndIhappentolikeyourletterssoIhopeyou

don’tmindtheriskofFredinterceptingthem.

Reese:Theriskisworthit,love.CanIseeyouthisweekend?

Me:IthinkIcansqueezeyouinsomewhere.Ihaveaweddingcake

toworkontonightbutI’mfreetomorrownight.

Joeyreturnswithtwosodasandplacesoneinfrontofmeonthecounter.

“Thanks.So,whereareyouandyourhotasslawyergoingtonight?”Iforcemyselftokeepmyeyes

onJoeyandnotthephonethatisinmyhand.

Henoticesthestruggleinstantly.“SomeritzyItalianjoint.Andyoudon’thavetohideyour

enthusiasmaboutReesetextingyou.I’mdonetryingtoconvinceyouthatit’smorethanyou’rebothletting

on.”Hetakesasipofhissodaandpullshisphoneout,pointingtotheclockonthewallandsmilingwide.

“Sweet.Dancepartytime.”Isqueal,settingmyphonedownonthecounterashedockshisphone

ontothespeakerstationandflipstoasong.

EveryFridayatnoon,JoeyandIdanceandsingalongtoonesongintheshop.Itdoesn’tmatterif

customerscomeinanditdoesn’tmatterhowbusyweare.WealwaysmaketimeforonesongonFriday.

Afewmonthsago,Ihadanentireweddingpartyinheredancingalongto“LockedoutofHeaven”by

BrunoMars.Itwasawesome.JustinTimberlake’s“LoveStoned”blaresthroughthespeakersasIspin

aroundandbegindancingandsingingalongtothelyricswithJoey.

I’monaseriousrollwhenhecutsthemusicandstandsstaringattheshopdoor,thefamiliarhotguy

inthebuildinglookonhisface.Spinningaroundtoseewhatthefussisabout,Iseeaveryamusedface

staringatme.Smilinginasuitandtie,theattractiveblondstepsforwardandtiltshishead.

“Well,thankChristIdecidedtostopinhereduringmylunchbreak.OtherwiseImighthavemissed

thathotlittleshow.”Hestepsclosertothecounterandpresseshishandsonthetop,causingmeto

stumblebackabit.

“Sweetmother.You’relikeasexymanmagnetlately,”Joeymutterstomesoftly.

Iclearmythroatandsmile.“Sorryaboutthat.CanIhelpyou?”

“Ihopeso,Dylan.”Hiseyesdroptomynametagandthenflickbacktomyface.Goodbutdidn’t

havethesameeffectasmynamecomingoutofReese’smouth.He’stallandblond,haircutshortand

spikywithchiseledcheekbonesandthinlips.“Myfathercameintheotherdayandrequestedsomething.

He’snotfeelingwellsohesentmetocomepickitup.”Heglancesdownatthedisplaycaseandthen

backupatmyface.“DoyouhaveanyideawhatI’mreferringtobecausehewasn’tspecific?”

Ithinkforaminutebeforeitdawnsonme.“Oh,thetarts.”Ishufflequicklytothekitchenandbring

outthecontaineroftreats.“I’msorrytohearheisn’tfeelingwell.”

Themansmirks.“Yeahwell,Ican’tsayIshareyoursympathy.Hisillnessdidbringmeinhereto

seeyou.”Hesmileswide,showingperfectteethandwinksatme.Ishudderabit.

“Jesus.”Joeyuttersashestepsbehindtheregister.Iignorehimandthecommentfromtheman.

“Umm,wellthetartsare$3.75apiece.Howmanywouldhelike?”

“Idon’tknow,threeIguess?CanIgetyournumber?”

IfreezemidairasI’mreachingintothecontainertopickoutthetarts.Jesus,Joeywasright.Idon’t

thinkI’veeverbeenthispopularwithmenbefore.Quicklyshakingoffhisquestion,Ipullfourtartsout

ofthecontainerandplacethemintoapastryboxasJoeyringshimup.

“I’mseeingsomeone.Hereyougo,thefourthone’sfree.”Ipushtheboxacrossthecounterandmeet

hiseyes.They’rethestrangestcolor,amixbetweenmustardyellowandpaleblue.It’sabitunsettlingand

Iquicklyglanceaway.

“Wellthat’stoobad.Ifhefucksupandyoustopseeinghim,givemeacall.”Hesmilesandpullsa

cardoutofhispocket,slidingitacrossthetable.Iglancedownatitbrieflybeforeflickingmystareback

uptohim.There’ssomethingaboutthisguythatIfindtobeamajorturnoffbutIcan’tquiteputmyfinger

onit.“Thanksforthetarts,”hesays,turningandexitingtheshopasIpickuphiscard.

“BryceRoberts.Well,hewasdisturbinglyforward.”Spinningaround,Itosshiscardintothe

trashcananddustmyhandsoff,brushingthecreepinessoffmyskin.

“Excuseyou.Whyareyouthrowingoutahotguy’snumber?IthoughtyouandReeseweren’t

serious?”Joeypriesasmyphonebeeps.

Ireachexcitinglyforitandhearhisquietlaugh.“Ihavethehottestguy’sphonenumber.I’mset.”

Reese:I’llcometoyou.8:00p.m.?

Me:Soundsperfect.

**

IworkedonthecakefortheSmith/Cordsweddingallnight,finallypassingoutalittleafter

2:00a.m.ItwasoneoftheprettiestcakesI’dmadeyet.Thebridehadrequestedediblecherryblossoms

alongthebaseofeachtierandIsurprisedmyselfatjusthowrealistictheyturnedout.Isnappedaclose

uppictureofonebeforesendingittoReese,sinceheseemedtoappreciatemywork.Hisresponsewas

nothingshortofswoonworthy.Yes,nowthatwordisbeingthrownaroundinmyvocabularyaswell.

JoeytextedmeearlyonSaturdayandtoldmethathewasn’tfeelingwell,thinkinghehadsomebadfood

attherestaurantwithBillyandwasbeingtakencareofinbedallday.I’msurethatmeantnotjustina

bringyouchickensoupandpopsicleskindofway.ThismeantthatIwouldbemakingthecakedelivery

onmyowntoday.Iwasabitnervous.Ihadn’tdonethatinyears,thelasttimebeingwhenJoeyspenta

weekendwithaveryhotGreekguyhemetataclub.TheyfuckedandfoughtwhileIbustedmyasstrying

tocarryasixtieredcakeupahugeflightofstairs.Hepaidforthatoneforweeks.

IstareoutatSamthroughmyshopwindow.Thevanispulledupinfrontoftheshop,backdoor

wideopenandreadyformetoslidethecakeinside.It’salmostnoonandIneedtoleavenowifIam

goingtomakeittothereceptionhalltodropoffthecakeintime.Trafficisalwaysanightmareon

SaturdaysandIknowit’sgoingtotakemelongerthanIwouldliketogetthere.I’mstalling,notreally

wantingtoattempttocarrythecakebymyselfandpossiblyhaveamajormishap.“Damnit,Joey.”Igrab

myphoneoutofmypocketandscrolltomyfavoriteweddingplanner’scontactinfo.

“Hello,sweets,”shesingswithherchipperI’mgoingtokeepeverybodyinthisgoddamned

weddingpartycalmvoice.Ichuckleintothephone.

“Hey.I’mjustnowleavingtodropthecakeoffsoImightbeabitlate.”

“We’rerunninglateasitissonoworries.Thisfuckingbrideisdrivingmeinsane.”Shesighs

dramatically.“Iseriouslyfeelbadforhergroom.Prettysurehe’sinforalifetimeofannoyance.”Ihear

commotioninthebackgroundandcanonlyimaginewhatJulsisdealingwith.She’shadsomedoozy

brides.

Isighinrelief.“ThankGod.I’mflyingsolotodaysinceJoeyisplayinghousewithBilly.Ireally

hatedoingdeliveriesalone.”

Ihearhergaspdramatically.“Whatareyoudoing?Gofindthepreacher.He’sbeenMIAfortwenty

minutes.Sorry,Igottago,Dyl.Thisweddingisn’tgoingtostartatallwithoutme.Hey,arewestillonfor

amuchneededgirl’sdaytomorrow?”

Ijumpinexcitement,almosthavingcompletelyforgottenaboutthemassagesandfacialswebooked

weeksagoafterdeclaringhowlittleweseeofeachother.“Yes.I’msoreadyforthespaandmyJulstime.

Goodluckwithyournightmarebride.”

“Thanks,I’llneedit.Bye,sweets.”

Iclickendandturnaround,staringthecakedownasitsitsonmysidetablethatIdoconsultations

at.“Alright,it’sjustyouandme.Don’tfuckingpissmeoffandIwon’teatyou.Gotit?”

Ipropthefrontdooropenanddropdown,carefullyandohsoslowlypickingupthecakeand

carryingitouttoSam’sbackdoor.Settingitdownontheledge,Ieaseitinsidewhileholdingmybreath

andsayingeveryprayerIcanthinkofsilently.AftersuccessfullyputtingitwhereIwantit,Iclosemy

eyestightlyandforcetheairoutofmylungs.Okay,halfthebattle’sover.Movingtheholderinplacethat

keepsthecakesfromslidingallaroundthebackofthevan,Isecureeverythingtightlyandclosetheback

doors.Spinningaroundtowalktothedriver’sside,I’mhaltedimmediatelyasIrunstraightintoabrick

wallofachest.Ohterrific.

“JesusChrist,Justin,youscaredtheshitoutofme.”Ipushawayfromhimasheletsoutasmall

annoyinglaugh.

“Sorry,Dylpickle.”

Ugh.Ihatewhenhecallsmethat.Ihaven’tbeenabletoeatadillpickleintwoyears.

“Whatdoyouwant?I’mrunninglateandreallydon’thavetimetochat.”NordoIwantto.Imove

tosteparoundhimwhenhisarmshootsoutandgripsmywaist.“Whatthehell?Whatareyoudoing?”

“Ohcomeon,baby.Isawthewayyoulookedatmeatthewedding.”Hepinsmeagainstthevan,

grindinghiserectionintomyhip.I’mstrugglingagainsthimbuthisgripisfirm.Reallyfirm.“Youstill

wantthis.Icantell.”

“Areyouinsane?Getthefuckoffme!”Iyell,whippingmyheadfromsidetosideatthedeadstreet

aroundus.Figures,anyothertimeofdaypeoplearebustlingupanddownthesidewalks.“Whatthehell

iswrongwithyou?”

“Iknowyouprefermarriedmennow.Giveitup,baby.It’sallgood.Saraapparentlylikestofuck

aroundbehindmyback,soIcandothesametoher.”Hisbreathreeksofalcoholandmyshouldersbegin

toburnwherehe’ssqueezingme,pressingmybodyintothesideofmyvan.Herunshistongueovermy

earandIbuckagainsthim.“Stillsweet.”

Icontinuepushingagainsthischest,tryingtobackhimoffabit.“You’redisgusting.I’mnot

interested.I’llneverbeinterestedagain.Fuck,you’rehurtingme,Justin.Letgo!”Hisfingersaredigging

intomyskinandIwanttocrybutIsomehowmanagetoholditin.I’vecriedenoughoverthisasshole.

Hepullsmetowardshimandthenslamsmeoncemoreagainstthevan,thistimeknockingtheair

outofmylungsanddroppingmetomyknees.Ifalloverontomyside,gaspingforairashebendsdown

andleanshisfaceintomine.“Yourloss,”hewhispersandstormsawayasIfinallytakeinenoughairto

calmmyscreaminglungs.Icoughandwheeze,clutchingatmychestasIstruggletopullmyselfuponto

myfeet.Whatthefuck?Whatjusthappened?Justinturnedpsychotic,that’swhathappened.Myentire

bodyisinpainandIwanttogobackinsideandnursemywoundsbutIcan’t.

“Fuckinghell,”IwhimperasIclimbintoSamandstarthimup.Ipullthevisordownandquickly

trytorecovermyappearancesothatIdon’tlooklikeIjustgotmolestedinthestreet.Myhairisamess,

completelyunraveledfrommybunandmyfaceisstreakedwithmakeup.Iwipeundermyeyes,removing

mymascara,andcleanuptherestofmyface.Peelingmytopdowntorevealmyshoulder,Iwinceatthe

brightredfingertipsizedmarksthatarehighlyvisible.“JesusChrist.Thatfuckingprick.”Ipullmyshirt

backupandcoverthemupquickly,restingmyheadbackandtakinginseveralslowdeepbreaths.That

bastard.I’mgoingtodismemberhimthenexttimeIseehim.Ishakemyheadandfixmyhair.Ican’t

dealwiththisrightnow;IhaveajobtodoandIneedtofuckingdoit.Ipushtheeventsthatjusttranspired

outofmymindandpullawayfromthecurbandtoaweddingwherehopefully,theonlydickthebride

willbesuckingwillbeherhusband’s.

Eight

Everythinginvolvingthecakedeliverywentsmoothly.Everythingexceptforwhathappenedbefore

theactualcakedelivery.Soakingmysoremusclesinmytub,Irunthroughtheeventsthattranspired

severalhoursagoinmyhead.Justinwasneveraggressivewithmewhenweweretogether.Heneverput

hishandsonmelikethatbefore.SoIcanonlychalkuphisfuckedupbehaviortohimdiscoveringhis

wife’sweddingindiscretionsanddealingwithitlikealunatic.Ifinditratherperfectthathe’sgetting

whathedeserves,aslongashedoesn’tdealwithitatmyexpense.Onethingisforsure,ifhetouchesme

again,hewon’thaveadicktocheatonhiswifewith.I’llcutthatshitoffandmakehimeatit.

MyphonebeepsandIsitupinthetub,pullingitoffthesinkandreadingthemessage.

Reese:Westillonfor8:00p.m,love?

Isighheavilyandstareathismessage.I’mbeyondexcitedtospendtheeveningwithReese,butI

don’twanthimtoseethehideousmarksthatgracetheskinofmyshouldersandmyupperbacknow.And

spendingtimewithhimandnotfuckingisgoingtobeachallenge.Ofcourse,Icouldconvincehimtodo

clothesonfuckinglikewedidatthewedding.Thatwasstillinsanelyhot.InodatmydecisionasItype.

Me:Webetterbe.I’minthetubrightnowgettingreadyforyou.

Reese:Proveit.

Somanyoptionshere.

Islumpdownsothatthetopsofmykneesaresexilypokingoutofthewater

andpressthemagainsteachother.Itakeaquickpictureandsendittohim.

Reese:Ilovethoselegs.Especiallywhenthey’rewrappedaround

myhead.

Me:Iespeciallylovethattoo.Nowstopdistractingme.Ihave

anincrediblyhotCPAcomingoverinlessthananhour.

Reese:Luckybastard.

Idressinmyfavoritepairofskinnyjeansthatmakemyasslookhigherandtighter,atightblackT-

shirtthathasawickedlyplungingneckline,andmyblackpumps.Forcasualwear,IhavetosaythatIam

lookingprettydoable.MywavyblondhairfallssmoothlypastmyshouldersandIstickwithminimal

makeuptonight,justsometintedmoisturizer,mascara,andsomelipgloss.Asofttappingontheglassdoor

downstairssendsmecarefullyhurryingdownthestairsandthroughthekitchen,stoppinginthedoorway

atthesightofmydateinthewindow.Shit,notadate.Notadate,Dylan.

Iwalkthroughthedarkbakeryuptothefrontdoor,wavingsweetlyathimashissmilegrows.

Reachinguptounlockit,Iseehiseyesroamdownmybody,takingineveryinchofmebeforetheyfinally

returntomyface.Iholdmyhandonthelockashestudiesme.

“Hi,handsome,”Isay,stillnotturningthelocktoallowhimentry.Hisgreeneyesaresoftand

warmandI’mdyingtolethimin.ButI’mgoingtowait.

“Hi,love.Areyougoingtoopenthedoororareyouexpectingsomeoneelse.Anotherincredibly

hotCPAmaybe?”Heplaceshishandsoneithersideofthedoorandtiltshisheadtotheside,archinghis

browatme.OhhowIloveplayfulReese.

“Nojustyou.Howwellcanyouseemefromoutthere?”Thesightofhiminjeansandafittedgun

metalgreyT-shirt,hugginghisbodyperfectlythewayIwanttoismakingmefeelscandalousallofa

sudden.

“Uh,prettywell.”Henarrowshiseyesatme.“Whatareyougettingat?”

Istepbackafewfeetandstandstill.It’sdarkoutsidealreadybutReeseisbeingilluminatedbya

streetlampthatisonthenearestcorner.HistallframeistheonlythingIcanseethroughtheglass.Ismile

widelyathim.“IfI’mrighthere,canyouseemeokay?”

Henods.“NotaswellasI’dliketobutyeah.What’sup?”

IpullmybottomlipintomymouthasIholdupafinger,indicatingforhimtowaitamomentasI

disappearintothekitchen.Carryingoutawoodenchair,IsititdowninthemiddleoftheroomwhereI

hadjustbeenstandingandturnmyeyestowardshim.He’sstudyingmecuriously,hiseyesindicatingthat

hehasnoideawhat’scoming.Orwhoiscomingforthatmatter,becausesomeonewilldefinitelybe

coming.

“Isthesidewalkbusytonight?”Iask,movinggracefullyintothechairandfacinghim,legscrossing

infrontofmeandmyheeledfootdrawingcirclesintheair.

Hescratcheshisheadandglancestohisleft,thentohisrightbeforeturningbacktome.“No,Ithink

I’mtheonlyguyoutherewaitingforyou.Youaregoingtoletmeinright?”

AndthatistheonlyconfirmationIneedtogettheshowstarted.

“Yes,inaminute.”Iuncrossmylegsandspreadthem,myfeetfirmlyplantedonthetiledfloorasI

leanbackagainstthehardwood.IkeepmyeyesonhimasIslowlytrailmyhanddownthefrontofme,

glidingovermybreastsandstoppingatthetopofmyjeans.

“Dylan,whatthefuckareyoudoing?”

Takingbothofmyhands,Ipopthebuttonofmyjeansandslidemydominanthandintomypanties,

lettingoutaloudmoanasIbeginmovingtwofingersagainstmydrenchedclit.Reesebraceshimself

againsttheglasswithwideeyesandanopenmouth.

“Dylan.Holyfuckingshit.Love,letmein.”Hisonehandgripshishairwhiletheotherpullsatthe

doorhandlerepeatedly,theglassshakingslightly.

Tiltingmyheadback,Ibringmyfreehanduptomybreastandsqueeze,pullingatmyerectnipple

throughmysheerbraandthinshirt.Myfingersdiplower,spreadingmywetnessaroundanduptomy

enlargedhotspotasmybreathingbecomesloudandjagged.Hebeginspacingoutsidethewindow,never

lettinghiseyesleavemeorwhatIamdoing.

“Reese,OhGod.I’mpretendingit’syoutouchingme.”Thisisabsolutelytrue.Ican’ttouchmyself

anymoreandnotimagineitisn’thim.

“Fuck.LetmeinandIwillbetouchingyou.”

Closingmyeyes,Imovemyfingersinquickcircles.Ithinkofthefirsttimehetouchedmeatthe

wedding,thewayhishandsslidupmythighs.Thewayhegrippedmyhipsandpulledmeagainsthim,

meetinghisthrustswithsuchforcethatIthoughthewouldbreakme.Hiseyes,hislips,thewayhefilled

mecompletelyonTuesdayandthefeelofhisskinagainstmyskin.Howhekepthiseyesonmewhenhe

wasdevouringmebetweenmylegs.I’mmoaningloudly,workingmyselfupandthenIfeelit.Thepull.

Theheat.Slowandsteadypouringovermeandflushingmyentirebody.Ipulseagainstmyhand,coming

longandhardallbymyself.

“Reese.”Buckingagainstthechair,Iholdmyfingersstillbutapplyenoughpressuretogiveme

whatIneed.Myeyesareclosedandmyheadisthrownback,butthroughmymoansIhearseveralbouts

ofpoundingontheglassgoingonandknowthathe’sdyingoutthere.Idon’tknowwhy,he’lldefinitelybe

gettinghisinaminute.

Liftingmyheadslowly,IpushmyselfoutofthechairandcalmlybuttonmyjeansbeforeImoveto

standdirectlyinfrontofthedoor.Ismileslylyathisappearance.Ifeelamazingandhelookscompletely

frazzled,hairstickingoutallovertheplace,eyeswide,jawtightlyclenched.Ibitemycheekandgiggle.

“You’regoingtokillme.Youknowthisright?”hesaysasIslowlyslipmyfingersintomymouth

andsuckonthem.Herunshishandthroughhishairwhiletheotheronegripsthedoorhandle.“Dylan,if

youdon’tletmeinrightnowI’llbereplacingyourdoortomorrow.”

Isnickerandpullmyfingersoutofmymouth,quicklyreachingupandunlockingthedoorashe

bargesthroughandpullsmeagainsthim.Pickingmeupandwrappingmylegsaroundhiswaist,heturns

andlocksthedoorbehinduswithhisfreehandbeforehebringshismouthtomine,hisotherhandholding

meup.

“Sofuckingsexy,love.Butdon’tdothatagain,”hesaysbetweenkissesandIpullback,seeinghis

seriousexpression.

“Youdidn’tlikemyshow?Itwasjustforyou.”Hecarriesmeovertothecounterandsitsmedown

ontopofit,settlinghisbodybetweenmythighs.Hishandsrunupmyarms,brushinglightlyovermy

shouldersandupmyneckasheslowlytracesmythroatwithhisfingers.

“Ilovedyourshow.ButIdon’tlikenotbeingabletogettoyou.Iwasdyingoutthere.”Ismileand

pressmyforeheadagainsthisashetrailshisfingertipsdownmyneckandoverthetopofmybreasts.

“Youlookbeautifulbytheway,”hesayssoftlybeforepressinghislipsfirmlyagainstmine.Iopenfor

him,allowinghistonguetosoftlydipintomymouth.Hiskissesaren’turgentthistime.They’reslowand

lastingasifhe’ssavoringthismomentwithme.Swallowingmymoans,hisbreathcomesoutinhotspurts

andfillsmewithmyfavoritemintyflavor.Ipressmychestagainsthisashishandswraparoundmywaist

andslowlystrokemyback,myhandsclampedbehindhisneck.Webothbreakawayatthesametime,our

foreheadsreclaimingtheirspotagainsteachother’sandourunevenbreathingsurroundingus.

“Missedyourface,”Isay,regrettingitinstantlybecausehedidn’tneedtoknowthat.Crap.Ihave

anorgasmanddropmyguardlikeanamateur.

“Justmyface?”heasksplayfully.Hebrushesmyhairbehindmyearandrunshisfingersthroughthe

waves.

Ishakemyheadandbeginslowlyscratchingthebackofhisneck.Hiseyescloseandatinysoundof

pleasureescapeshim,makingmesmile.“Imissedyourfacetoo,”herepliesashereopenshiseyesand

tracesdownthesidesofmytemples,acrossmycheekbones,anddowntomylipswhereIkissthetipsof

hisfingers.

Hiswordswarmmethewaytheyshouldn’tandIknowIneedtobreakthismomentbeforeIsay

somethingIreallydon’twanthimtoknow.Iwasn’tonlyweakwhenitcametosexaroundthisman.Heis

slowlyinfiltratingeverycutofmysoul.“Wantatour?”Hislipspullupinthecornerandhestepsback,

holdingouthishandtohelpmeoffthecounter.IquicklydropmyhandoutofhisbeforeIbecometoo

familiarwiththesensationandwalkthroughthedoorwaythatleadstothekitchen.Flippingonthelights,I

walkaroundthelargeworkbench,feelinghimwatchmefromwherehestands.

“Okay,sothisiswhereIspendmytimewhippingupmyfabulouscreationsandtryingdesperately

nottoeatthem,whichIusuallyfailatmiserably.”Imotionaroundtheroomandhearasoftlaughfromhis

direction.“Storage,fridge,freezer,andohshit.”IspotabatoficingthatIhadmadeearlierthismorning

whenIwastestingoutanewrecipe.GrabbingthebowlthatIhadplacedontheshelf,Istickmypinky

fingerintothehotpinkfrostingandslipitintomymouth.

“Mmm,yummy,”IsayasIflickmyeyesuptoReesewhoisperchedagainstthewall.Hisarmsare

crossedoverhischestandhe’swatchingmewithconcentratedinterest,whichI’mbeginningtonoticeisa

patternofhis.“Oh,Ifoundthisrecipeforchocolatepeppermintfrostingandhadsomeextratimethis

morningtoplayaroundwithit.UntilIrealizedthatIdidn’thaveextratimeandIstupidlyleftitout.”Ilick

mylipsandhiseyeswiden.“Wannataste?”

“Sure,”heanswers,movingtowardstheworkstation.Ihopupontopofitandwaitpatientlyfor

himtostandinfrontofme,ashishandsrestlightlyonmythighs.

Idipmyfingerintothefrosting.“Open,”Icommand,holdingmyfingerinfrontofhisnowslightly

swollenlips.Theycurlupintoasmallsmilebeforeheopenshismouth,histonguewrappingaroundmy

fingerandpullingeverylastbitoff.Jesus,hecouldprobablygetmereadyforsexjustbylickingan

envelopeinfrontofme.

“Good?”

“Very,especiallycomingoffyou.”

“Ilovemintchocolate.Ithinkit’stheperfectunionofflavors.”Idipanotherfingerintothefrosting

andpopitinmymouthashelickshislips.

“Ithinkyou’retheperfectunionofflavors,”heresponds,causingmetogrinevenwider.

“Wantsomemore?”Igotoreachmyfingerintothebowlwhenhegrabsit,takingthebowloutof

myhandsandplacingitnexttomeontheworkstation.Dippinghisownfingerintothebowl,herunshis

tonguealonghisbottomlipasheswipesthehotpinkfrostingdownthesideofmynecktomycleavage.I

whimperashistonguelicksoffthelineoffrostingthathe’sdrawn,payingextraattentiontothedollopthat

isnowdrippingbetweenmybreasts.

“Liftyourarms,”hewhispers,grabbingthehemofmyshirtandtuggingitovermyheadafterIobey

him.Hiseyesenlargeandflickfrommyfacetomyshoulders,hisfacehardeninginstantly.Ohfuck.

“Whatthehell?Whathappenedtoyou?”Hisfingerstrailthesmallfingertipsizebruisesthatgraze

overmyshouldersandIwinceathim.Movingmyhairoutoftheway,heleansaroundmeandIheara

softgruntashediscoversthebruisesonmyupperback.Shit.Imeanttokeepmyclotheson.This

conversationcouldhavebeeneasilyavoided.Damnhimandhisabilitytocloudmyjudgment.

“Whythehellareyoucoveredinbruises?”Hemovesbackinfrontofmeandeasesinbetweenmy

legsagain,commandingmyattention.

“Uh...”DoItellhim?Whatwouldhedo?WouldhegoafterJustin?Isthatsomethingyour

casualsexpartnerwoulddooristhatstrictlyaboyfriendmove?DidIwanthimtocare?

“Dylan.”

Mycaseofthewordvomitsuddenlyrearsheruglyheadagain.“JustincamebywhenIwasloading

Samtodaytogodeliveraweddingcakeandhecameontome.He’dbeendrinkingandhewouldn’tletgo

ofmeeventhoughIwasscreamingathimandthenhethrewmeupagainstSam.”Iwatchhisexpression

shiftrightinfrontofmetoanger.Histeethclenchtight,causingthemusclesinhisjawtoquiverandhis

nostrilsflare.Imovebackabit.Damn.AngryReeseisintimidatingandsexyashell.

“Thatassholeputhishandsonyou?”

“Yesbut---”

“AndwhothefuckisSam?Didhebringanotherguywithhim?”Heslamshishanddownonthe

worktopnexttomythighandIjump.“They’rebothfuckingdead.”Turningawayfromme,Igrabhis

shouldersandpreventhisescape.

“Don’t,justwaitaminute.”Hiseyesmeetmineandheraiseshisbrows.“Samismydeliveryvan.

Yes,Inamedit.It’sstupid,Iknow.AndyesJustindidthisbuthe’sneverputhishandsonmebefore.I

don’tthinkhewould’veactuallyforcedhimselfonme.Hewasprobablyjustupsetthathiswifecheated

onhim.”Whatthefuck?NowI’mmakingexcusesforthatasshole?Irundownhisarmsandpullhis

handsintomylap,squeezingthemgently.

“Areyoufuckingserious?”Hisvoiceboomsthroughoutthekitchen.“Idon’tgiveashitifhewas

drunk,upset,orwhateverthefuck.Hetouchedyou,he’sdead.”

“Reeseplease,whatwouldyoudo?Youcan’thurthim.Hecouldpresschargesagainstyou.Imean,

it’snotlikeitsself-defenseorsomething.Pleasejustletitgo.Itreallylooksworsethanitfeels.”Thatis

acompletelie.Ithurtslikehell.ButIamabsolutelyterrifiedthatReesewillendupgettingintotrouble

overthisandthatwillhurtahellofalotworsethanthebruises.

Herunshishandsdownhisfacebeforehereachesoutandholdsmine,hisexpressionsoftening.

“Youshouldhavecalledme.Whydidn’tyou?”Histhumbsstrokemycheeksashestudiesme.

Ishrug.“IhadtogodelivertheweddingcakeandIwasalreadyrunninglate.Besides,Iwouldn’t

wantyoutodosomethingthatcouldgetyouintotrouble.Heisn’tworthit.”Ireachupandholdhishand

tomyface.“Promisemethatyouwon’tdoanything.”

Hestepsclosertome,bringingourbodies’onlyinchesapartandallowingmetowrapmylegs

aroundhim.“I’msorry,Ican’tdothat.”

“Reese.”

“No,love.”Hekissesmequickly,shuttingmeupbeforehecontinues.“Ican’tandIwon’tlet

anybodyhurtyou.He’llnevertouchyouagain.ThatIcanpromiseyou.”

Inodslightly.Thetruthofthematteris,Ilikethathecaresaboutmeenoughtowanttoprotectme.

AndReeseissmart.Hewon’tdoanythingthatcouldfuckwiththecareerthathe’sworkedsohardfor.I

shouldn’tworryaboutthis.

“Okay,butcanwegobacktothefrostingnow?”Iask,seeinghiseyeslightupatthememoryofit.

Henodsslowly,thedesiresparkingbackintothegreenpoolsthatglareatme.

Ohthisisgoingtobefun.

Nine

I’mlyingcompletelynakedonmyworkbench,mythighsclampedtightlytogetherinanticipationas

Reesecontinuestoremovehisclothing.I’dneverrealizeduntilnowjusthowsexyitistowatchaman

undress.ButI’mquicklyrealizingthatwhateverthismandoes,hedoesitinaverysexyway.Ibitethe

insideofmycheekasIwatchhimpullhisT-shirtoffwithonehand,revealinghisbrilliantlysculpted

upperbody.Imoansoftlyatthesightofhimandcatchhisattention,seeinghislipscurlupinthecorner.

Hisboxerscomedownwithhisjeansandhestepsoutofthem,grabbingthebowloffrostingthathehad

placedonanearbystoolbeforehemovestowardsme.Hishandgripsmythighandspreadsitopen,

givinghimselfroomtosettlebetweenmylegs.IfeelthetipofhimpushagainstmyclitandIwhimper.

“Now,whereshouldIbegin?”Hiseyesrundownmybodyandhesmileswickedly.

“Youcanbeginwithstickingthatbigdickinme,”Ianswer,wigglingagainsthimtogivemesome

relief.Christalmighty,hefeelsamazing.

Hechucklesandbendsforward.“Somebody’sgreedy.Didyounotgetyourselfoffwellenough?”

Hedropshisheadandkissesbetweenmybreasts.“YoushouldhaveletmeinwhenItoldyou.Iwould

havemadeyoucomesohardyouwouldn’tbebeggingformycockjustyet.”Heholdsouthishandtolift

mesothatI’mnowsittingup,myeyesdoingaquickrundownofhisbodyandseeinghimnoticeit.

“Yes,youcaughtme,IwaslookingbutIcan’thelpit.”Ileanbackontomyhandsandstickmychest

out.“Now,getbusy.”

“Areyoualwayssobossy?”heasksashedipshisfingerintothefrostingandspreadsagenerous

amountontoeacherectnipple.ItrytokeepstillasbestIcanbutamquicklygettingworkedup.Butlet’s

behonesthere,I’vebeenworkedupfromthismansinceIfellintohislap.Helookssoconcentrated,so

meticulouswithhispatternhe’sdrawingonmethatitmakesmevibratewithsilentlaughteragainsthis

hands.“Stopsquirming.”Hescoopsanothergloboutofthebowlandtrailsitdownthecenterofmy

stomach,swirlingthepinksugarinessontomyclit.Ibitemyliptokeepfromjerking,watchinghimsetthe

bowlontothewoodnexttomeandstepback,admiringhiscreation.

“Youlike?”Iask,myeyesgluedtohismassiveerectionthatIamachingtojumpon.

Hishandstrokeshisjawashestudiesme.“Fuckyes.”HiseyesflickuptomineandIclutchthe

edgeoftheworkbenchwithmyhands.Shit,hissexstarecouldmeltmelikeacandle.Movingquicklyto

bridgethespacebetweenus,hishandgripsmyheadandcrashesmymouthagainsthis.He’srough,

swipingintomymouthwithhistongue,hisbreathhotandmintyonmyface.We’realllips,tonguesand

burstsofairashesucksandbitesmylip,thetinypainofitfuelingmydesireforhim.Breakingawayto

easemebackontothewood,histonguedartsoutandlickstheicingoffmyleftbreast.

“Ohyes.”Itanglemyhandsintohishairashestrokesmynipplewithhistongue,pullingitintohis

mouthandsuckinghardbeforereleasingit.

“Mmmm,youtastealmosttoogood.”Hismouthmovestomyrightbreastwherehelicksitclean

beforeflickingmynipple,earninghimselfadeepcryfrommycore.Hesitsupandstaresdownatme.

“Nowwhat?”heasksandIknowthelookonmyfaceisoneofpuredelight.WasIincontrolofthis?

“Lickme.”

“Bespecific,love.”

Isitupquicklyandwrapmyhandaroundhiscock,hearingasharpgaspfromhimashegrabsmy

neck.Heshakeshisheadandremovesmyhandgently,causingmetofrown.

“Notyet.”HeguidesmebackdownontomybackandIplayfullytrytoreachhimashebatsmy

handsaway.“YouweretellingmetolickyouandIwanttoknowwhere.”

Ismirk.“Youknowexactlywhere.”

Heshrugsandslowlybeginstracingmybellybutton,movingtheicingaroundandcausingmy

stomachtoclench.“Where,Dylan?”GoodLord,themanispersistent.IwishIfoundthattobeanything

butamajorturnon.

Okay,Icandothis.

Iclampmyeyesshut.“Reese,pleaselickmypussyuntilIcomeinyourmouth

andthenfuckmeuntilIcan’twalk.”Slowlypeakingoneeyeopen,Ifindaveryamusedmanstaringdown

atmewiththebiggestgrinI’veeverseenonhisface.Ican’thelpbutlaugh.“You’reapervert.”

“Soareyou.”Droppinginfrontofme,helatchesontomyclitandsuckshard.Igroanloudlyand

archmyback,feelinghishandsgripmyanklesandplantmyfeetflatdownonthewood.I’mcompletely

opentohimandgotodropmyfeetoffthesideswhenheholdstheminplace.

“MoveandIstop.”

Istaredownmybodyandlookintohisbrightgreeneyes.“Seriously?”Ishakemyheadquickly.

Crap.Ifeelsoexposedlikethis.Hecanseeeverything.

Hekeepshiseyesonmeashetrailssweetkissesonmyinnerthighs.“Doyouhaveanyideahow

beautifulyouare,Dylan?Everysinglepartofyou.Especiallyhere.”Hishandbrushesbetweenmylegs

andIwhimper.“Iwanttoseeyoulikethis.”Wellinthatcase.Idropmyheadbackandfirmlyplantmy

feet,lettinggoofmyanxietyandopeninguptohimandhisextremelytalentedmouth.

“Ohyes.”Imovemyhipsagainsthimasheslowlystrokesupmylengthandaroundmyclit,licking

offeverybitoficing.Iwanthimtopullmeintohismouthandsuckhard,knowingfullwellthatwhenhe

doesIwillsurelylosemymind.Buthedoesn’t.Hekeepsuptherhythmofdeepcaresses,swipingjust

overorjustundermyclitanddrivingmeinsane.Heonlydipshistongueintomejustenoughtomakeme

griphisheadwithmythighsandthenheslowlyremovesit.

“You’resoclose,love.”

“Iknowthat.Whyaren’tyoulettingmecome?”Myclimaxisthere,rightthereandhe’stoyingwith

it.Mybodyisshakingonthehardwood,theslightchillofitcoolingdownmyheatedskin.

“Icanfeelyoupulsingagainstmytongue.Iwantyoutocome,Dylan.Ireallydo.”Hegivesme

slowevenlapswithhistongue,swirlinganddipping.Brushingjustovermyclit,Ibringmyhipsupto

makehimgowhereIwanthim,whereIneedhimbuthishandquicklyclampsdownonmystomachand

pressesmetothetable.

“Please.Ineed…pleasejust….littlelower.Nohigher.Pleasewhatthefuck?”

“Areyounotenjoyingthis?”Lick.“BecauseIsureashellam.Infact---,”Lick,“---IthinkI’lldo

thisfortherestofthenight.”

OhGod,he’stryingtokillme.Fuckthat.Ifhewon’tgetmeoffthenI’llfuckingdoit.

Quickly

droppingmyhandtomysex,Igotorubmytwofavoritefingersonmyspotwhenhegrabsmyhand,

forcingitbackdowntothewoodandholdingittherefirmly.Lettingoutastringofcolorfulcursewords,I

finallyletmyselfgolimponthetableandgiveup.

“Whyareyoudoingthis?”Iwhimperashecontinueshistorment.

Hisbreathwarmsmebetweenmylegs.“Becauseyouwouldn’tletmetouchyou.Doyouhaveany

ideahowcloseIwastobreakingthroughyourwindow?”HelicksmyclitquicklyandIpant.“Iwantto

betheonlyonetogiveyoupleasure,Dylan.Yourorgasmsbelongtome.”Holyshit.Iamcompletelyfine

withthat.Yes.Absolutely.

“SoIcan’ttouchmyselfanymore?”

“NoyoucanbutonlyifIamtheretohelpyou.You’llnevercomeashardasifIdoitanyway.”

AnotherlickandIshake.“Youknowthatdon’tyou?”

“Yes.”TheorgasmsIgivemyselfareblandcomparedtohis.Eventhisanguishheiscurrently

inflictingonmeisbettersomehow.Imoanloudly.“Please,you’retheonlyguythat’severmademe

come.”

Hestops,completelyfrozenbetweenmylegs.Ifeelhishotbreathagainstmyskinbutnothingelse.

Shit,wasthatnotsomethingheshouldknow?Awesome.NoReesestyleorgasmsformetonight.Good

job,Dylan.Brilliant.

“Really?”Hisquestionhitsmeafterseverallongsecondsofsilence.

Inodandcovermyfacewithmyhands.“Really.It’sjustyou.”Ohthosewordsripthroughmeina

wayIdon’tneedthemto.I’mgoingtofuckthisupandit’llbeentirelymyfault.Iopenmymouthtosay

something,anythingwhenhewrapshislipsaroundmyclitandpullsitintohismouth.“OhGod.”Icry

out.Suckinghard,thenharder,hegrowlsagainstmeandIgoofflikeamissile.

“YES.”Mid-orgasm,hestandsupandbeforeIcanprotestthesuddenchangeofdirection,he

chargesstraightintome.“Reese.”

“Dylan.Holyfuck,youfeelincredible.”Hiswordsarebarelyaudibleovermycriesasthefirst

orgasmripsthroughmeandanothercomesupclosebehind.HishandsmoldtomybreastsasIgripthe

edgeoftheworkbenchandholdonfordearlife.

“Tellmeagain.TellmeI’mtheonlymanthat’severmadeyoucome.”Hepantsashispowerful

hipscrashagainstmylegs.Myeyesaregluedtohisbroadshouldersthatareflexingwitheachdrive.

IreleasemylipthatI’vebeenbitingandlookupathim.“You’retheonlyman.Andyou’reso

fuckinggoodatit.”Myeyesarelockedontohisface,hischest,hisneckasitpulseswitheachthrust.His

gazedropstobetweenmylegsandIknowhe’swatchinghimselfentermeoverandover,strokingmehard

anddeep.“Sosexy,love.Christ,I’mclose.”Pullinghisbottomlipintohismouth,hishandsdigintomy

hipsandpullmeagainsthispelvis.Ifall,givinghimanotherorgasmasIarchmybackofftheworkbench

andclencharoundhim.Hegroansloudlyandpulsesinsideme,givingmehisreleasewithmynameonhis

lips.

“Holyshit.”Ipantbetweenquickbreathsashesprayshisbodyontopofmine.

“Yeah,holyshit,”hesaysintomyneck.Iwrapmyarmsaroundhisbackandholdhimtome.I

missedthis.Thefeelofhischestagainstmine,thewaymyskinwarmsinstantlyagainsthis.Havinghim

killingmeslowlybetweenmylegswithhismouthisworthitifitallowsmetobethisclosetohim.Atthe

movementofhishead,Iglancedowntoseehiseyesturnuptomine.

“Handsome,”Isay,smilingasifI’djustwonthelottery.Hewinksatmeandquicklykissesmy

breastsbeforehestandsupandglancesdownatourhotpinkcoveredbodies.

“Love,Ithinkweneedashower.”HearcheshisbrowatmeandIquicklysitup,nodding

frantically.ShowerwithReese?Hellfuckingyes.

“Thisway.”Ihopdownandgrabmyclothesoffthestoolasheretrieveshis,trailingbehindmeasI

startupthestairs.

“Ah!”Afteraquickslaponmybacksidefromhim,wemakeittothetopandIturnaroundtoface

him,backingfartherintomylivingspace.“Thisisme,”Isay,watchinghimtakeitin.Itdoesn’ttakehim

long.Thereisn’tmuchtolookat.Hepeersaroundthepartitionandwiggleshisbrowsatmewhenhe

spotsmybed.Nowaybuddy.Nothappening.

“Ilikeit.It’stinythough,”hestateswithasmileashefollowsmeintomybathroom.

Turningontheshower,Iplacemyclothesonthesinktopandcatchaglanceofmyselfinthemirror.

Iamflushedandcoveredinstickyfrosting,andIloveit.Comingupbehindme,heplaceshisclothesnext

tomineandwrapshisarmsaroundmywaist,pullingmebackagainsthim.Rollingmyheadbacktorest

onhischest,oureyesmeetandhesmilesatme.Iwillnever,notevergettiredofhissmileandthelittle

linesitbringsoutnexttohiseyes.

“AreyoumadatmeforwhatIdid?”heasks,causingmetonarrowmystareabitbutcrackingwhen

hiseyesbulge.ThebathroombeginstofillwithsteamandIturninhisarms,lightlypressingakisstohis

jaw.

“No,however,ifyouwouldhavekeptmyorgasmfromme,youwouldbepurchasinganewninety

thousanddollarvehiclebecauseIwouldhavekeyedtheshitoutoftheoneyouhave.”

Hechuckles.“Noted.Now,let’sgetwet.”

Igrindeviouslyandopenmymouthtosaysomethingdirty,ofcourse,whenhestopsmewithhis

fingertomylips.

“Pervert.”

**

I’venevershoweredwithamanbeforeandImustsay,I’mprettysurethat’sthebestwaytogo.I

wascompletelypampered.Helaughedatmyfiftythousandshampoos,conditioner,andbodywash

choicesthatwerestackedagainstthewallandstudiedseveralbeforechoosingtheonesthathesaid

smelledlikeme.HepickedthescentsIusedmostoftenandIbeamedinsideattheideaofhimknowing

whatIsmelllike.Heinsistedonwashingmyhair,takinghistimeandgivingmeanamazingheadmassage

ashelatheredmeup.Washingmybody,hisfacehardenedashecarefullyrubbedmyshouldersandmy

backbutgotbacktoplayfulwhenhewashedbetweenmylegs.Thathespendalittleextratimeon.AfterI

rinsedclean,hedroppedhisheadandfresheneduphismarksonmybreastsasImoanedsoftlyagainsthis

mouth.HeseemedjustashappyaboutthembeingthereasIdid.

Whenitwasmyturn,Iskippedtheloofahandsqueezedthebodywashdirectlyontomyhand,

wantingtofeeleveryinchofhimasIwashedhim.HismusclesrelaxedagainstmytouchandIrubbedhis

armsthewayIdidonTuesday,seeinghiseyescloseandhisheadfallforward.Theonlymusclethat

didn’trelaxandseemedtonotbeabletoatallduringourentireshowertogetherwasmyfavoritemuscle

ofhis.Istrokedhimlongandhard,thelatherbuildingasheheldontomywaistandburiedhisfaceinmy

hair.Hekissedmedeeply,almostlovinglywhenhecameinmyhand.Thefeelofhishotliquidagainstmy

skinwasexhilaratingandIwantedtofuckhimagain,butdidn’t.Morethanthat,Iwantedtogetoutofthe

showerandnuzzleagainsthischest,breathingmyfavoriteair.ButReesehadotherplans.Hewanted

somethingbesidesfrostinginhisstomach.

Iperchmyselfuponthecounterandwatchasheraidsmyfridge,hishairwetandfuckablymessy.

“Whereisallyourfood?Theonlythinginhereismilk,someweirdcheese,andjelly.”Heclosesthe

doorandglowersatme.I’mbusypullingmydamphairupintoamessyknotontopofmyheadwhenhis

questionfinallyhitsme.

“Oh,Ieatoutalot.Andwhatweirdcheese?”Ihopdownandstickmyheadinthefridge,following

hisfingertothesecondshelf.Iquicklyclosethedoor.“Thatisnotcheese.Maybeitwasatonepointbut

now,I’mnotsurewhatitis.”

Helaughsandpullshisphoneoutofhispocket,kissingthetopofmyhead.“Alrightwell,Ineedto

eatsomethingbesidesyou.Whatdoyouwant?Chinese?”

Ishrug.“Idon’tcare.I’mnotreallyhungry.”

Pressingthebuttonsonhisphone,Istudyhimashelickstheslitrunningdownhislipandbringshis

celluptohisear.Ireclaimmyspotonthecounterashemovesbetweenmylegs.Thisisbecominga

regularpositionforus.MyfingersslipunderhisshirtandItracethehardlinesofhisstomach.

“Yeah,Iwantedtoplaceanorderfordelivery.Dylan’sSweetToothonFayette.Yes,oneorderof

generaltsochickenandoneorderofshrimplomein.Nopethat’sit.”Hemovesthephoneawayfromhis

mouth.“What’syourlastname?”

Myjawdropsopen.“Youdon’tknowthegirl’sfullnamewhoyouarecurrentlyfucking?That’sjust

awful.Iknowyours,Carroll.”Icrossmyarmsovermychestandpushmyboobsup,seeinghiseyesflick

downandlingerforalongsecond.

“Dylan.”

Ishakemyheadindisapproval.“It’sSparks,”Ihuff.

Hechucklesinamusement.“Wow.That’sridiculouslyfitting.”BeforeIcanaskhimwhatthehell

thatmeanthelooksawayfrommeandpaysattentiontothecall.“Alrightthanks.”Placingthephoneback

inhispocket,hekissesmequicklyonmynoseandIgroaninprotest.

“WhyisSparksfitting?”

Hisliptwitches.“Because,you’relikethislittlefirecracker.”Ilaughasheplantsakissonmy

forehead,runninghishandsupanddownmyarms.“Dinnerwillbehereintwenty.Oh,beforeIforget,

we’rehavingthisbigmeetingwithsomeclientsonTuesdayandIwaswonderingifyouwouldliketo

providesomeofyourtreatsforit.”

Irunmyfingersthroughhisdamphair,causingittocurlabitattheends.“I’dloveto.Whatkindof

treats?”

“Idon’tknow.It’sat10:00a.m.soIguessbreakfasttreats?”Hisforeheadcreasesashelookspast

meandthinksitover.Lord,heisadorable.

IsmileandplaywithhisT-shirt,bunchingitupinmyhands.“Well,Ihappentomakesomemean

breakfasttreats.HowmanypeopleamIprovidingfor?”

“Twelve.”

Inod.“Okay.I’llmakesuretohaveenoughforeveryonetohavethree,thatwayiftheydon’tget

eaten,whichisabsurd,thenyoucanhavetheextra.”

“Great.I’llpayyouinorgasms.”Wellthatwaswaytootempting.HissmirklingersasIcarefully

thinkabouthisoffer,lookingupattheceilingformyanswer.

“Eh,”Ifinallyreplyandhewrapsmeup,kissingmeonceandthenoncemore,longerandsofterasI

melt.

Wesitincomfortablesilenceasweeatourdinneronthefloorinmylivingroom.Reesemakessure

topointoutthatIamindeedhungry,watchingmewithamusementasItearintobothofhisorders.AndI

makesuretopointoutthatheistheonewhoatemostofthefrosting.Iexhaleheavilyandleanagainstthe

partition,restingmyhandonmybellyashestickstheleftoversinmyfridgeandreturnstositacrossfrom

me.

“Full?”heasks.

“Very.Thatwascrazygoodthough,Ihaven’thadChinesesinceJoeyandIordereditonEaster

weekendandwepukeditupinmybathroomafteranightofbingedrinking.”Hemotionswithhishands

formetoelaborate.“Hegotdumpedbythisguythroughasingingtelegram.”

“Jesus,that’sreallyshitty.Ididn’trealizethosethingswerestillaround.”

Inodandlaughslightly.“Meeither,itwasawful.Thetelegramcametotheshopandhesangin

frontofallthesecustomers.Joeywassoembarrassed.”Ibrushthetendrilthatisticklingmycheekoutof

myface.“Sointypicalyoujustgotdumpedandyourbestfriendsaregoingtocheeryouupfashion,

JulsandIboughtallthisalcoholandweplayeddrinkinggamesallnight.Itwasreallyfununtilweallgot

sick.”Ishakemyheadatthememory.“AndthatiswhyTequilaandIarenolongeronspeakingterms.”

Helaughs,restingbackonhishands,hislonglegsstretchinginfrontofhimbrushingagainstmine.

“Ican’timagineyoudrunk.Doyougetevenfeistierorareyouanangryfireball?Becausehonestly,Ican

kindofseeboth.”

Igiggleandrubmybarefootagainsthisleg.“Neitheractually.Igetreallyloudandstartgiving

peoplenicknames,andthenIusuallygetemotionalwhichisalwaysfunforeverybody.”Ilaughandhe

smilesatme.“Whataboutyou?Doyougetextraflirtyordoyoustarthittingpeople?CauseIcankindof

seeboth.”Hemovescloserandpullsmyfootintohislap,rubbingitandcausingmetomoansoftly.

“Idon’tgetdrunk.Well,atleastIhaven’tsinceIwasseventeen.Idon’tusuallyhavemorethana

fewdrinksatatime.”Hepausesbrieflyandnarrowshiseyesatme.“Howoldareyou?”Hisweirdline

ofquestioningcausesmetogivehimastrangelook.Henoticesitandcontinues,“IjustrealizedIhaveno

idea.”

“Jeez,goodthingI’mlegal.”HesmirksatmeandIshakemyheaddisapprovingly.“I’mtwenty-six.

Sowhydon’tyougetdrunk?”

Heseemstomullovermyanswerwithasmile.“Idon’twanttosoIdon’t.Ithinkdrinking

specificallyforthepurposesofgettingdrunkisbullshit.”

“Wellyouhaven’thadsomeonebreakupwithyouthroughamusicalnumber.”Ipullmyfootoutof

hisgraspwhenhestartsticklingit,quicklytuckingitundermyotherknee.Itrytostiffenmyyawnbutgive

intoit,rubbingmyeyeswiththeheelsofmyhands.Iamthoroughlyexhaustedfromallmyorgasmsand

myfullbellyismakingmesleepy.ReesestandsupandholdshishandouttomeandIallowhimtohelp

metomyfeet.Thisgesturewillalsonevergetold.

“Ishouldprobablygo,”hesays,runninghishandsupmyarmsandholdingmeatmyelbows.Iyawn

again.Damnit,Ireallydidn’twanthimtoleavebuthecouldn’tstay.Nofuckingway.Nosleepovers.

“Whatareyoudoingtomorrow?”

Ilickmydrylipsandplacemyhandsonhischest.“JulsandIarehavingagirlsday.We’regoingto

thespatogetmassagesandfacialsandtalkaboutboys.”HesmirksatmeandIgiveitrightbacktohim.

“IfeellikeIhaven’thadheralltomyselfsinceshemetIan,whichItotallyget.She’scrazyabouthim.”

Hishandsgripmyhips.“I’msurethefeelingsmutual.HetalksaboutherconstantlyandIgivehim

allkindsofshitforit.”Ismileathisadmission.DefinitelytellingJulsthattomorrow.Afterabrief

moment,hisfacescrunchesandherunshishandthroughhishairquickly,lookingabitunsureofhimself.

“Uh,whenyougetmassages,isitagirlthatdoesit?”

Irollmyeyes.“Andyoucallmethepervert?”

“What?Oh,nothat’snotwhatImeant.Pervert.”HesnortsandIshrug.Yup,that’sme.“Imean,isa

guygoingtobegivingittoyoubecauseIdon’tthinkI’mokaywiththat.”

Wait,what?

Ianswerhonestly.“ActuallyIhavenoidea.Julsbookedthemweeksago.But,why

doesitmatter?It’samassage,it’snotsexual.”

“Itjustdoes.Ifyouwantaguytomassageyou,I’llgiveyouamassage.I’dpreferitifitwasagirl

andnotforthepervertedreasonsyourmindisthinking.”

Istepbackandstareathim.Seriously?“Okaywell,Ijustdon’tunderstandwhythisbothersyou.”

Ifthisisjustcasual,thenitshouldn’t.Right?

Hethrowshishandsupandlooksexacerbated.“You’reright.Nevermind,itdoesn’tbotherme.I

shouldgo.”Heleansinquicklyandkissesmeonmytemplebeforeturningforthestairs.

“Reese.”Helooksoveratme,stoppingonthestairs.MyheadisfullwiththingsIwanttosayto

him.Iwanttoaskhimtobehonestwithme,totellmeexactlywhyitbothershimtohaveamanmassage

me.Iwanttoaskhimifthiswasbecomingmoreforhimthanhowitstartedout.ButIdon’t.Idon’task

himanything.“Goodnight.”

Hesmilesslightlyandcontinueswalkingaway.“Goodnight,love.”Iwatchhimdisappeardownthe

stairsandhearthedoorcloseshutbehindhimasI’mlefttoponderwhatjusthappened.

Ten

IwokeupfeelingjustasconfusedasIdidbeforeIpassedoutlastnight.Plusontopofthatfun

emotion,Iwasalsocompletelyexhaustedaftertheshittynight’ssleepIgot.Hiswordsplayedonrepeat

inmymind¸seepingintomydreamsandleavingmefullofquestions.QuestionsIwanteddesperatelyto

haveansweredbyhimbutdidn’thavethegutstoask.Ididn’tgetit.Whywouldhavingamassagefroma

manbotherhim?Massagesweren’tsexualatallinthatsetting.I’msuretheycouldbeifReesewasto

givemeone,andthethoughtofthatgavemechills,butatthespaIwascurrentlydrivingtowithJuls?No

fuckingway.

I’vehadmengivememassagesbeforeandIenjoyedthemabitmorethanwomenbecausethey

werestrongerandtheirhandswerebigger.Ilikedmymusclestobeworkeddeeplyandnotwithlittle

daintywomanhands.Butnever,noteverhaveIoncefeltanythingduringamassagefromamanotherthan

purerelaxation.Christ,mostofthetimeIpassedoutandhadtobewokenup,droolstickingtomyface

andlookinglikeahotmess.

IgruntasIlookoutthewindow.I’mtenseandanxiousandIneedtofuckingrelax.

“You’reawfullyquiet,sweets.Notlookingforwardtoourdayofbeauty?”Julsasksaftergivingme

myalonetimetocontemplatewhatthehellhappenedlastnight.Notthatithelpedany.

Isighheavily.“SomethingstrangehappenedlastnightwithReeseandI’mnotreallysurewhatto

makeofit.”Iturnmyattentiontoher.“Doyouknowifmymassageisbookedwithamanorawoman?”

Shelaughsabit.“Uhoh.Didsomeonevoicehisopinionofnotwantinganothermantouchingyou?”

“Sortof?Idon’tknow.Hesaidhe’dpreferifitwasawomanandwhenIaskedhimwhyitmattered

somuchbecauseitwasn’tlikeIwasgettingahappyendingoutofit,hesaidthatitdidn’tmatterandthen

heleft.”Irestmyheadbackandrackmybrain.“Ijustdon’tgetwhyhecaresifthisisjustsexbetween

us.”

Shemakesasoundofamusementbeforeanswering.“You,mylovelybestfriend,areanidiot.”

“What?Why?”ThecarslowsasshepullsintotheparkinglotofTranquilityDaySpaandmy

stomachtightens.Fuck.DidIreallywanttogothroughwiththisifitwasbookedwithaguyandI

couldn’tswitchit?DidIevenwantamassageanymore?

Shepullsintoaparkingspot,shutsthecaroff,andturnstowardsmeinherseat.“Dylan,seriously?

WhatifReesewastheonegettingamassageandsomefuckinghotchickwasrubbingherhandsallover

hisbodyandgivinghimpleasure.Wouldyoubeokaywiththat?”

Wellshit,Ididn’tthinkaboutitlikethat.

“No,Idefinitelywouldn’tbeokaywiththat.”Icovermy

facequicklyandrubit.“Damnit.I’msuchanasshole.”

Shelaughsandpullsmyhandsdown.“No,you’renot.You’reexpectinghimtonotcareaboutyou

becausewhatyoutwoaredoingiswhatyoukeepfoolishlyreferringtoascasual.Butyou’reveryhard

nottocareabout.”HerthumbsoftlystrokesmyhandandIsmileweaklyather.“Evenifyouguysarejust

havingfun,he’sallowedtowanttokeepyoutohimselfandsoareyou.”God,Imissthesetalkswith

Juls.Shealwaysmakesperfectsenseoutofanysituation.Shestopslovinglycaressingmeandslapsmy

hand,causingmetoshriek.“Nowbuckupandputyourgirltalkgamefaceon.Youareminetoday.”

**

Themassagewas,ofcourse,bookedwithamanbutIquicklyprotestedandwasabletoswitchto

anavailablewomanthathadaclientcancelonher.Irelaxedimmediatelyafterthatwastakencareofand

enjoyedmyfacialfirst,laughingwithJulsaswelienexttoeachotheronadoublewidetableandget

pamperedtogether.Ihadn’trealizedthatshehadmadeitsothatwewouldbeattachedatthehipallday,

butwasinstantlygrateful.Asweareleftalonetoletourmasksdry,Itakehersilenceasmyopportunityto

spillmyjuice.

“So,ReesetoldmelastnightthatIantalksaboutyouconstantly.Justthoughtyoushouldknow.”I

crackasmileandhearherreactnexttome,asoftgaspcomingfromherlips.

“Ohman,IthinkIlovehim,Dylan.Liketotallyheadoverheels,Iwanttospendtherestofmylife

withhimkindoflove.Isthatcrazy?Imean,we’veonlyknowneachotherafewmonthsandI’vealready

pickedoutmyfuckingweddingcolors.”

Iletoutaheartylaughandgrabherhand,squeezingittightly.“AndwhatcolorwillIbewearing?If

yousaysomethingpastelI’mpushingyouoffthistable.”

“Ohfuckno.YouknowI’vealwaysdreamedofafallwedding.”Shegruntsinannoyance.“Jesus,

whyareweeventalkingaboutthis?It’snotlikeIanisanywhereclosetoproposingtome.Hehasn’tsaid

helovesme,ifheevendoes,whichheprobablydoesn’t.AndIamnotgoingtobethefoolthatsaysitfirst

andstandstherelikeanidiotwaitingforhisresponse.Nofuckingway.”

“Maybehe’sjustwaitingfortheperfectmoment.Yousaidhe’sromanticashell.Maybehewantsto

makesureyou’rereadytoheareverythinghehastosay.”

ThedooropensandourtwoestheticiansreturnasIscrunchmyfaceupandfeelthemaskcrack.Juls

sighs.“Idon’tknow,maybe.Whatever,Irefusetosayitfirstthat’sallI’msaying.”

“Metoo,”Irespondwithoutanythoughtatallandhearaloudgaspfrommyright.No.Noway.Iam

notinlovewithReese.Nope.

“Ohmy…”shestartsbutIsqueezeherhandtightlyandhearayelpinsteadoftherestofher

sentence.

Istammer,“That’snotwhatImeant.Ididn’t,Imean,Idon’t.Shit.”Iturnmyheadandseeherwide

eyes,asmilecrackingopenherface.“YoumentionawordofthisconversationtoJoeyandIwilltellIan

myselfthatyou’vepickedoutthenamesofyourchildren.”ShebeginstosilentlygiggleandIslowlyjoin

her.JesusChrist.Notetoself,don’tgotospadayswithJulsanymorebecauseyouloseyourfucking

mind.

**

Wesettleinforourmassagesandonceagain,Icompletelyforgetaboutthestateofmyupperbody

afterIstripandsprawloutonmystomach,waitingformymasseuse.“Thefuckisthat?”Mybestfriend

screechesasshesettlesinnexttome.IgruntintotheopenheadrestI’mstaringatthefloorthrough.WellI

mightaswellspillitsinceherreactioncan’tbeanyworsethanReese’s.

IexhaleloudlybeforeIexplain.“Justinstoppedbytheshopyesterday,drunkoutofhismind,and

cameontome.Iwasn’tveryreceptiveandhedidn’thandleitwell.”Icanfeelherbodytensenexttome

asIkeepmyheaddown.Hereitcomes.Ifyouhaven’thadthepleasureofbeingintroducedtohurricane

Juls,consideryourselflucky.

“WHATTHEFUCK,DYLAN!ThatsorryassmotherfuckerwillwishhewasdeadwhenI’mdone

withhim!”Hervoiceissoloud,I’mcertaineverypersonatthespaisgettingatasteofthis.

“YousoundlikeReese.”

“Fuckthat.ReesecanhavehimafterIgetmyhandsonhimfirst.Noguyshouldeverputhishands

onagirl.”ShepausesandIhearhertensebreathing.“Hehasn’t,Dylanpleasetellmehe’sneverdonethis

before.”

Ipushupandrestonmyelbows.“Areyouserious?Hehasnevertouchedmebefore,ever.Iwould

havekilledhimandyouknowit.Nowcanwedropthisplease?Iwanttorelaxandyoufreakingoutnext

tomeisn’thelping.”

“I’mgoingtocuthisballsoffandmailthemtohismother.”Julsscowlsatmeasthedooropensand

twoolderladiescomein.Shesettlesdownonherstomachandcursesunderherbreath.

“Ohmy.Hunny,thosebruises.”TheonemasseusestatesandIgrunt,restingmyheadbackdown.

“Yeahyeah.Justworkmylowerbackandmylegsplease,”Isayflatlyandinawaytoleteveryone

inthatfuckingroomknowthatIamdonetalkingaboutthis.BecauseIam.IfJustinevertouchedmeagain,

Iwouldn’thavetoworryaboutReesegettingintotroubleforretaliatingorJulsrippinghisheartoutofhis

chest,becauseIwouldendhimmyself.

**

“Iwantedtomakeaquickstopbeforewewenttolunch.Thatokaywithyou?”sheasksafterpulling

ontothehighway.MyeyesareheavyandIfeelcompletelyrelaxedafterourdaytogether,whichisnice

consideringhowstressedoutIwaswhenthedaystarted.

“YeahIdon’tcare.Hey,haveyouheardfromJoeyatall?Iknowhe’sspendingtheweekendwith

Billybut,whenthehellhaveyoueverknownhimtonotcalloneofusimmediatelyafterhegetsnailed?”

Shelaughs.“IthinkJoeydoesthenailing,right?Isn’thethemaninhisrelationshipsorwhateverthe

fuck?”

“Idon’tknow.Dotheyswitchitup?”Iglanceoutmywindowatthepassingcars.“Imean,dothey

taketurnsdoingthenailing?”

“Idon’tthinkso.Wouldn’titbelikeyouswitchingwithReeseormeswitchingwithIan?”Shepulls

offthehighwayanddownafamiliarstreet,turningintoalargeparkinglotthatoverlooksaviewof

athleticfieldsandbasketballcourts.Pullingbehindatree,sheputsthecarinparkandturnstome,smiling

wide.

“YeahIguessyou’reright.Umm,whatarewedoinghereexactly?”Igazeoutthefrontwindowand

seethecrowdsofpeopleinfrontofus.Thereisalargeplaygroundthatisfilledwithkidsandtheir

parents,asoccergamegoingoninthemiddleofthelargefield,andagroupofmenplayingbasketball.

MyeyeswidenandIgriptheseat.Ohmy.

“Ithoughtwe’dstopandenjoythisbeautifuldayforasecondbeforewestuffourfaces.See

anythingyoulike?”

Ispothimrightaway,almostinstantly.Shirtlessinloosefittingblackrunningshorts,Reesedribbles

theballbetweenhislegswhileIanguardshim,steppingbackslightlybeforegracefullypushingtheball

intotheairandwhooshingitthroughthenet.Fuckmehelooksedible.Ihearmybreathingquickenasmy

eyestakeinhisgleamingmuscles,drenchedinsweatandpracticallycallingouttome.Touchme,Dylan.

Youknowyouwantto.

“Holyhell.”Islammyheadbackandhearhergiggle.“Icanavoidlunchentirelyifyou’dlike.Who

thehellneedsfoodanyway?”Myvoiceisthickandittakesmeaminutetoswallowthelumpinmythroat.

“Seriously,whatthehellisfood?”shesaysthroughalaughandIfeelmybodytemperatureriseas

Reesestealstheballfromanotherguyandgoesuptodunkit.“Wannagetacloserlook?”

Myeyeswiden.“Idon’tknow,he’ssoprettyfromrighthere.IthinkifIgetanycloserImightpass

out.”Thatandthefactthatitwillprobablytakeanarmytoprymeoffhisbody.

“YeahIknowwhatyoumean.Christ,lookatIan.IfhekeepsmovinghishipslikethatImightcome

rightherenexttoyou.”Sheunbuttonsthetopofherblouseandsighsheavily.“How’sthesexwithReese

anyway?Amazing?”

“Amazingdoesn’teventouchthesurfacewithhim.”Imoansoftlyashegoesupandblocksanother

man’sshot.“It’slikehisbodyisspecificallywiredtobringmetoorgasm,andImeaneverypartofhis

body.”Myeyesgostraighttohislipsashebitesonhisbottomone.“Hismouthisinsane.”

Julscovershermouthandgiggles.“Fuck,Iknowwhatyoumean.Ianisobsessedwitheatingme

out.Hehastodoiteverytimeheseesmeorit’slikehecan’tfunctionproperly.AndChristalmightyishe

goodatit.”

Iglanceoverather.“Whowouldhavethoughtabunchofaccountantscouldwriteabookonoral

sex.”MyeyesflickbacktoReeseashedunkstheballagain.“JesusChrist,he’sgoodlooking.Itreallyis

unfairtotherestofthemalepopulation.”

“Ooohhh.Sendhimatextmessage.Thatwaywecanseehisfacewhenhereadsit.Ifuckinglove

that.Seeingaguy’sreactiontoyouwhenhedoesn’tknowyou’relooking.Sofuckinghot.”

Ismileandpullmyphoneoutofmypurse,thinkingforamomentbeforemythumbsbegintomove.

Me:Hi,handsome.Justsoyouknow,Ihadawonderfulmassage

fromaverystrongwomannamedBetsytoday.However,Iwouldlike

anotheronefromyouifyou’restilloffering.Doesyourscomewith

anorgasm?

IpresssendandwatchasReeseafteramomentturnstowardsapileofclothesthataretucked

againstthechainlinkfence.Holdingupafinger,hejogsovertoitandsearchesaroundbeforeheliftsout

hisphone.Hischestisrapidlyrisingandfallingandhishairisdrenched,stickingoutallovertheplace.I

canonlyseehisprofileandbitemylipashisturnsupslightly.

“Ah.Lookatthat.Soworthit,”JulssaysandIcompletelyagree.

Droppinghisphoneonhisclothes,hejogsbackovertothegamewithhisbeautifulgrin.Myphone

beepsandIholditupforusbothtoread.

Reese:Hi,love.I’mgladyouenjoyedyourgirlsdayandyes,the

massagefrommethatyouwillgetverysoondefinitelycomeswithan

orgasm.Pervert.

Igiggleandturntoseethestrangestlookonmybestfriend’sface.

“What?”Iask,seeinghereyesbeginningtowater.OhChrist.

“Hecallsyoulove?Ahhell,Dylan,Idon’tknowwho’smoreromantic.”Shewipesunderhereyes

andIfeelminewellup.“Youbetterholdontighttothatone,sweets.”

“Yeah,tellmeaboutit,”Isayandblinkrapidly,tryingtodrymineup.

Julsbacksoutoftheparkingspaceanddrivesthroughthelot,slowingdownandstaringpastme

throughmywindow.“Hey,isn’tthatoneofthedeskgirlsfromtheirwork?Shelooksreallyfamiliar.”

MyeyesfollowhersandIrecognizethegirlimmediately,thehairadeadgiveaway.She’ssittingon

abenchpartiallyobstructedbyatreeandstaringinthedirectionofthebasketballgame.“That’sReese’s

receptionist.Fuckingbitch.ShewassorudetomewhenIwenttokillhimonMonday,actingall

possessiveandcatty.Whythefuckisshehere?”Partofmewantstohopoutofthecarandrunstraight

intohisarms,declaringinfrontofherandwhoeverelsewantedtowatchthatheismine.ButIdon’t.

InsteadIjustglareatherprofile.

“Idon’tknowbutshe’sstaringatthemlikeacreep.Redheadsfreakmethefuckout.”

“Metoo.Comeon,let’sgoeat.”

NowthatIseemtohavenotcompletelyblownitwithReese,myappetiteisbackwithavengeance.

Although,itisstillabitunsettlingseeinghisreceptionisteyethelotofthemuplikeshewantstoeatthem.

Maybeshe’sdatingoneoftheotherthreeguys?ImakeamentalnotetoaskReeseaboutitnexttimewe

seeeachotherwhichIdecidewillnotbeuntilTuesday.Ican’tseehimeveryday.I’malreadystruggling

withkeepingmyfeelingsandemotionsoutofthisthingbetweenusenoughasitis.

**

MondaymorningcamequickerthanIwouldhaveliked.IpassedoutearlyonSundayandslept

soundly,nothearingmyphoneringwhenJoeycalledat2:00a.m.Noticingthemissedcallwhenmyalarm

goesoffat5:00a.m,Idialhimquickly,puttingitonspeakerphoneasIgetintomyrunninggear.

“Ihavenews,cupcake.I’monmywaythoughsomeetmeoutfront.”

“Okay.”Iendthecallandsliponmysportsbra,tanktop,andrunningshortsbeforepoppingintomy

Nikes.Grabbingmyphoneandmykeys,Irundownstairsandoutthefrontdoor,lockingupbehindmeasI

begintostretch.

It’salreadyhumidoutandmytopbeginstosticktomeinthemostuncomfortablewaypossible.

SummersinChicagocanbebrutal,andwhenyoustartsweatingimmediatelyaftersteppingoutsideinthe

earlymorninghours,youknowyou’reinforahotone.ThiswasoneofthereasonswhyIdidn’t

understandtheappealforasummerwedding,atleastnothereanyway.Maybesomewherewithno

humiditythatdidn’tturnyourhairintoafrizzfestafterspendinghoursonmakingitlooknothinglessthan

perfect.IattendedanoutdoorweddingafewsummersagowhereIappallinglywatchedmybeautiful

three-tieredwhitechocolatecreationmeltinfrontofeveryoneatthereception.Itwasawful.Luckily,the

bridethoughtitwashilariousanddidn’tcareonewayortheotherbecauseshewassodeliriouslyhappy

tobemarriedtoherhusband.Julsworkedthatweddingwithmeandtoldmethatthecouplehadonlybeen

datingnineweeksbeforeheproposedtoherandatthetime,Irememberthinkingthattherewasnowayin

hellthatmarriagewasgoingtolast.Howcouldanyoneknowwithoutadoubtthattheywantedtobewith

eachotherforeverafteronlybeingtogetherafewmonths?Julsagreedwithme,sayingthatthebridehad

mentionedhowstronglyherfamilywasagainstthemarriagebutshedidn’tcare.Shetoldmybestfriend

thatshedidn’twanttowaitanylongertostartherlifewithhimandthatwhenit’sright,it’sjustright.The

pastthreesummersontheiranniversary,I’vegottenathankyoucardfromthebrideforhelpingmaketheir

daysospecial.AndnowlookatJuls.She’sonlyknownIanafewmonthsandiscrazyinlovewithhim.

Andlookatyou,Dylan.No,don’tlookatme.Nothingtoseehere.

MyeyesflicktowardsthepavementasJoey’stallframecomesjogginginmydirection.Stoppingin

frontofmeandpullinghiskneetohischest,helooksgiddybeyondhisusualgiddyself.

“Areyougoingtomakemeask?”Iquestion,stretchingmyarmsovermyhead.

Hesmilesandswitcheslegs.“Billyaskedmetomoveinwithhim.”

Whoa.

“What?Areyouserious?That’scrazy.Whatdidyousay?”

“Yes.Obviously.”Hejumpsupanddownonhisfeetandmotionstomethatheisreadytostart

running.

“Obviously?Joey,doyouevenreallyknowthisguy?Hecouldcutoutyourorgansandsellthemon

eBay.Hecouldhaveaweirdfetish.”

Heshakeshishead.“IknowhimaswellasyouknowReeseandyou’reinlovewithhim.”

FuckingJuls.

JesusChrist,Ineededsomenewfriends.“Icannotbelieveshetoldyouthat.Iwill

cutabitchnexttimeherskinnyasswalksintomyshop.”RealizingthatJoeyhasstoppedrunning,Iglance

backandseehisexpression.Motherfucker.Heisonesneakybitch.

“Ifuckingknewit.Youlovehim,Dylan.OhmyGod,thisisfantastic.”Runninguptome,hegrabs

myshouldersandpullsmeagainsthisalreadydrenchedshirt.

“Grossyou’reallsweaty.AndIamnotinlovewithhim.JulstoldmethatshewasinlovewithIan

andIsaidsomethingaboutmaybe,possibly,doubtfullyonedaybeinginlovewithReese.That’sit.Endof

discussion.”

Steppingbackandholdingmeatarm’slength,hestudiesmeforamomentbeforehespeaks.“Okay,

whatever.ButIthinkI’minlovesocanwefocusonthatfuckingweirdnessforasecond?”

WehitourstrideandIletJoeytellmeallabouthowhe’sseenBillypracticallyeverynightsince

theymetattheweddingandthathe’sneverfeltanythingevenclosetothisbefore,whichIknewalready.

JoeywasnevershyabouthisfeelingstowardshishookupsandalwayssharedmoreinformationthanI

wouldcaretoknowmostofthetime.HetoldmethattheywerehangingoutatBilly’slastnight,lounging

andwatchingtelevisiontogetherwhenhejustcameoutandaskedJoeytomoveinandwithouthesitation,

Joeysaidyes.Hesaidthathedidn’thavetothinkaboutit,thatheknewhewantedtobewithBillyevery

freesecondhehadandthathehadneverbeenthishappybeforewithjustoneperson.Iwasspeechless.I

wasliterallywithoutspeech.ThiswasJoeyHoltweweretalkingabouthere.Themanwhowentthrough

othermenlikehewasgoingforsomekindofrecord.Heoncehookedupwiththreeguysinonenightata

clubanddiditwithoutthemknowingabouteachother.Hislongestrunningrelationshipwasfiveminutes.

Andnowafteralittleoveraweekofknowingsomebody,he’swifingup?Iwasn’tsurewhoseweddingI

wouldbegettingfittedforfirst,Juls’orJoey’s.

IcalledMrs.Freythatafternoon,confirmingthedetailsofheranniversarycakeshewantedmeto

createforhersinceImissedourmeetingonTuesday.ShesweetlyaskedmehowIwasfeelingandtold

mehowexcitedshewastobecelebratingfiftyyearsofmarriagewithherhusband.Fiftyyears.Icouldn’t

evenimagine.Shewasabitundecidedabouthercakeflavors,knowingonlythatherhusbandwanteda

chocolatecakebutnothavinganyotherpreferences.IsmiledtomyselfwhenIaskedherifthetwoof

themlikedmintchocolateandshesquealedintothephone.Suggestingmynewlydiscoveredchocolate

peppermintfrostingandtellingherhowabsolutelydecadentitwas,shesettledonhercakeandI

reassuredheritwouldbereadyforpickuponFriday.

Afterendinghercall,Islipmyphoneoutofmypocketandscrolltothecontactinfoofacertain

icinglover.

Me:GuesswhatkindofcakeIgettomakeforsomeone’s

anniversary?I’llgiveyouahint.It’saflavorthatyouseemtobe

quitefondof.

IwalkintothebackasJoeyhelpsacustomerandbeginpullingoutingredients.Ihaveagood

amountofbakingtodotonighttoprepareforthemeetingI’msupplyingtomorrowandwanttostartonit

assoonaspossible.Idecidetomakeanassortmentofmuffins,blueberry,poppyseed,andmybanananut

ones,someappleturnovers,andavarietyoffruitandcheesedanishes.TheexcitementofseeingReeseis

almostpalpableatthispointandIneedtostaybusy.Placingmymixerontheworktop,myphonebeeps

andIrunovertowhereIhadlaiditdownontheothersideofthetable.

Reese:CoulditbeacakewithacertainhotpinkfrostingthatI

lickedoffyou?

Me:That’stheone.Idon’tthinkI’lllookatthatfrostingthe

sameagain.Ormyworktopforthatmatter.

Reese:WellI’lldefinitelyneverlookatmycouchthesame.

How’syourdaygoing?

Igiggleandpullthebakingflour,sugar,andsaltofftheshelf.

Me:Good.BusylikeeveryMonday.I’mgoingtobeslammedall

nightmakingthebreakfasttreatsfortomorrow.How’syourday?

Reese:FullofmeetingsthatI’mhavingtroublefocusingin.My

mindiselsewhere.

Me:Ohisthatright?Andwhereisthatdirtymindofyoursright

now?

IgrabseveralmixingbowlsandbakingsheetsandspreadthemoutinfrontofmeasIletmyown

mindwanderelsewhere.

Reese:Well,it’simaginingyouspreadoutinfrontofmewearing

adresswithnothingunderneathit,yourlegsopenandmyfaceburied

betweenthem.Butearlier,Iwasfuckingyouonmydesk,againstmy

windowandinmychair.I’vehadaveryunproductiveday.

“Shit.”Notetoself,neverreadadirtytextfromReesewhileopeningabagofflour,whichIam

nowcurrentlycoveredin.“Niceone,Dylan.”

“Youallright,cupcake?”JoeyyellsfromupfrontasIquicklydustmyselfoff.

“Yeah.Reeseisalsoreallygoodattheexplicittextmessaging.Likereallygood.”

“Goddamnit,Billy.”

IlaughundermybreathatJoey’scommentasIsweepuptheflourI’vejustspilledeverywhere.

Wipingmyhandsoffonmyapron,Igrabmyphoneandquicklyreply.

Me:Well,Ithinkweshouldbeabletomakeatleastoneofthose

thingshappentomorrow.Thatbigdickbetterbereadyforme.

Reese:MydickandIcan’twait.Seeyoutomorrow,love.

Eleven

JoeyandIloadupSamonTuesdayat9:30a.m.withthebreakfasttreats,leavingmewithjust

enoughtimetorunbackinsidetogivemyselfaquickonceoverbeforeit’stimetogo.I’vepickedouta

palepinksummerdressandpaireditwithsomestrappysandals,pullingmyhairupintoabunbeforeIrun

downstairsandlockuptheshop.JoeyisperchedagainstthevanandmessingwithhisphonewhenI

finallyemerge.

“Okay,howdoIlook?Professionalwithahintofplayful?Doyouthinkthedressistoomuch?

MaybeIshouldwearmyapron.ShouldIwearmyapron?”Christ,whythehellwasInervous?I’ve

suppliedtonsofbusinessmeetingswithtreatsbefore.Ofcourse,Iwasn’tbanginganyofthemenI

suppliedforuntilnow.

Hesmilesandslipshisphoneaway.“TheonlywayIwouldsuggestforyoutowearyourapron

wouldbeifyouweretoonlywearyourapron.Youlookgreat,cupcake.”

“Thanks.IthinkReeselikesmeindresses.”Iwalkaroundtothedriver’ssideandhopinasJoey

getsinonhisside.

“HmmmIwonderwhy?”Helaughsasmyphonebeeps.Iquicklyslipitoutofmypurse.

Reese:Countingtheminutes.(19tobeexact)

Igiggle.

Me:Ohcomeon,Mr.CPA,I’msureyoucandobetterthanthat.

Reese:1140seconds.Also,Imetyouroughly823,447secondsago.

NowgetyoursweetassheresafelysoIcankissyou.

Ihearamuffledlaughfrommyright.“ArewegoingtobedrivingtotheWalker&Associates

buildingoraretheycomingtousforthemeeting?”JoeyasksasIputmyphoneinthecupholder,grinning

likeanidiot.

“Smartass.DoesBillyknowyoucangettestyinthemorning?”

HelaughsasIpullawayfromtheshop.“Ohheknows,cupcake.Heknows.Bytheway,this

Saturdaywe’rehavingourcomingoutasanofficialcouplepartyorwhateverthefuck,Billy’sidea.7:00

p.m.athisplace,Imeanourplace.OoohhhIlovethesoundofthat.”

“You’readorable.WhatshouldIbring?Booze?”Iask,weavinginandoutoftraffic.

“Obviously,bitch,andahousewarminggiftforyourstruly.”Hesneaksinthatlastpartunderhis

breathandIlaugh.I’mgiddilyexcitedtogotothisparticularparty,andnotjustbecauseIgettoseeBilly

andJoeytogetherandthehomethattheywillbesharingwhichI’msureisinsanelychic.Joeyhas

impeccabletasteandeventhoughI’veonlyseenBillyafewtimes,themancandress.ButI’malso

excitedbecauseacertainnumbersguythatI’mcrushingonwillmostlikelybeattendingwithme.Andthe

thoughtofthatmakesmedrivealittlebitfastertowardsourdestination.

**

ImakeJoeycarrythebulkoftheloadaswewalkintothefoyer,acrossthemarblefloorandtothe

backofthelobbytotherowofelevators.Ridinguptothetwelfthfloor,IshiftanxiouslyonmyfeetasI

holdmytwoboxesofmuffinsinmyhands,glancingoveratthetopofJoey’sheadthatsticksupbehindhis

sevenboxes.Tryingtomufflemygiggles,Ihearhimgruntandmaketinynoisesofprotestastheelevator

stopsonourfloorandIwalkbehindhim,placingmyhandonhisback.

“IfIdropthis,cupcake,it’llbeyourfault.Thisisonceagainaperfectreasonwhyweneedanother

fuckingemployee.”

“Stopbitchingwe’realmostthere.”Iwalkdownthelonghallway,guidingJoeyalongwithmeand

stopatIan’sreceptiondesk.Theyoungblondelooksupandsmileswarmly.

“Ms.Sparks?”sheasksandInod.

“That’sme.Whereshouldwetakethese?”

Joeyturnshisbodysothathecanseethegirl.“Seriously,wherehunnycauseI’mabouttodropall

oftheseandthosesexybusinessmencaneatthemoffthefloorforallIcare.”

Shelaughsabit.“Firstdooronyourright.Goonin.Mr.ThomasandMr.Carrollareexpecting

you.”IsmileatherandwalkwithJoeytothetalldoor,openingitwithmyfreehandandallowinghimto

walkaheadofme.

Westepintoalargeconferenceroomthathasakillerview,tallfloortoceilingwindowsthat

overlookthebustlingcity,andalongrectangulartable.Afewmen,allinnicesuits,glanceupfromtheir

seatsastheyflipthroughfileswhileanothergroupofmenstandinthecornerbythewindow,conversing

together.MyeyesfindReeselikeahoningmissile.Standinginadarkgraysuitwithatwobuttonjacket

andalightanddarkgraypatternedtie,hestopsmid-sentenceashiseyesfallonme.Ifeelit,thatfamiliar

pullinmygutthatmakesmewanttodropmyboxesandspringupintohisarms.Themanrocksasuit

betterthananyone.Butinsteadofactingonimpulse,Isettleforasmile.

“Hi,”Isaysoftlyashemovestowardsme,hislonglegsbringinghimtomequickly.Ihearalaugh

comingfromthecornerandthinkIrecognizeitasIan’sbutcan’tbepositive.Rightnow,theonlyother

personintheroomwithmeisReese.

“Hi,yourself.Here,letmetakethat.”HegrabsmyboxesandplacesthemonthetablewhileJoey

mutterssomethingunderhisbreath.

“Ican’twaittodigintothese,Dylan.MygirltalksaboutyourcreationsnonstopandI’mstarving,”

Iansaysashewalksuptothetableandopensamuffinbox.

“WellIhopeyouenjoythem.Thebananaonesaremyfavorite.Oh,nobodyhasallergiesright?”I

askandheararoundofmuffled‘No’s.’

“Willsomeonetakethesefrommealready?ForChrist’ssake,Reese,”JoeysaysandIcoverupmy

mouthquicklytohidemylaugh.

Reesetakeshisgazeoffmeandgrabsseveralboxesoffthetop,revealingaveryredfacedJoey.

“Sorry,man,”heapologizesandspreadstheboxesoutattheendofthetable.Joeyshakeshisheadin

frustration,placingtheremainingboxesonthetableinfrontofthebusinessmenandopeningthem.

“Gentlemen,pleasehelpyourselvestothetreatsprovidedbyDylan’sSweetTooth.We’llget

startedinfive,”Ianannounces.ShufflingofpapersandfootstepsfilltheroomandIwatchasReeseturns

awayfromthetableandwalkstowardsme.Joeystepsasideandpullsouthisphone,smilingatsomething

andgivingmetheindicationthatthesomethingheissmilingatisBillyrelated.

“Handsome,”IsaysoftlyasReesestopsjustinfrontofme,hishandsrubbingsoftlyupmyarms.

“Love,youlooksopretty.Iloveyouindresses.”Mychestconstrictsasheleansinandplantsthree

gentlekissesonmylips.

“AndIloveyouinsuits.I’mabouttosayfuckyourmeetingandtakeyourighthereonthistablein

frontofeveryone.”

Helaughsandlooksatmewickedly.“Iwouldn’tobject.Thismeetingisgoingtoborethehellout

ofme.MaybeI’llmakeyoustaytokeepmecompany.”

Iplaywiththebuttonsonhisjacket,pullinghimclosertome.“IfyouthinkforonesecondthatI

couldstayinthisroomwithyoulookinglikethatandnotwrapmylipsaroundyou,you’recrazy.”

Hishandgrabsmyfaceandheleansintomyhair,brushingagainstmyear.“Pervert.Ilovethatdirty

mouthofyours.”Heglancesdownbrieflyathiswatchbeforegrabbingmyhand.“Comewithme.”

IlookoveratJoeywhoseesmegettingpulledtowardsthedoor.BeforeIcanspeak,hegrinsand

winksatme.“Meetyoudownstairs,cupcake.”IblushinstantlyasInodathim.

“Don’tyouhaveameetingtorun?”IaskasReesepullsmedownthehallwaytowardshisoffice.

Mystomachisdoingflipsinanticipationofgettinghimalone.

“Themeetingcanwait.Ineedyou.”Myheartsqueezesathiswordsaswewalkintohisreception

area.Stopinterpretingthingsthewayyoushouldn’t,Dylan.Scanningthesmallareaaswewalk

towardshisdoor,Ilockontotheredheadbehindthedeskwhoglaresinmydirection,hereyesgoingto

myhandthatisinReese’sandherjawclenchingbeforeshelooksbackupatmyface.“Uh,Mr.Carroll,

youhavethatmeeting.”

“Notnow,Heather.”

Herfacehardensashepullsmeintohisofficeandclosesthedoorbehindus,lockingitbeforehe

pressesmeagainstit.

“Fuckinghell,Ineedmorethanfiveminutes,Dylan.Idon’tlikerushingwithyou.”Hislipsfind

mineandIpartforhim,strokingmytongueagainsthisashereachesdownandwrapsmylegsaroundhis

waist.ImoanintohimashiserectiondigsrightwhereIwantit,rubbingmerightwhereIneedit.My

handsgriphisheadandholdittomineashisonehandslipsinbetweenus.Heundoeshisbelt,unzipping

andunbuttoninghisslacksandpullshimselffree.

“Thisisgoingtobehardandquick,love.”

“Pleasehurry,Ineedyou.”Mypantiesaremovedtothesideandthetouchofhisfingerbetweenmy

legsmakesmegasp.Alowgruntescapeshislipsasheburieshisfaceintomyneckandpushesinsideme.

Hegrowlsloudly,hisonefistcomingupandbangingthedoorabovemyhead.

“You’resowet.Ilovehowreadyyouareforme,”hesaysbetweenmuffledsoundsashepounds

intome.Iholdontightlyaroundhisneck,groaningashestrokesinsidemewiththeperfectamountof

pressure.Iwon’tlastlongandIknowit.I’vebeenprimedforhimallmorning.Mylegstremblearound

hiswaistashishandsholdmyassandpullmetowardshimtomeethisthrusts.

“Reese,OhGod.”Ithrowmyheadbackandbitemyliptoquietmysounds.Iwanteveryonetohear

usandIdon’tatthesametime.Partofmedidn’tcarethatIambeingfuckedhardagainsthisdoorwithhis

secretaryjustoutside,buttheotherpartofmewantsittobejustusinthismoment.Helicksupmyneckto

myearandbitesdownlightly,pullingthetipintohismouthashisonehandcomesaroundmeandholds

myface.HislungesbecomeharderandIdigmynailsintohisneckandpullhimcloser,needinghimas

closetomeasIcangethim.

“Dylan.”

Mynameonhislipspushesmetothetop.TheburningsensationshootsthroughmybodyandIlose

controlwillingly.“I’mcoming.”Istrainandarchintohim,givinghimtheanglewebothneedtogethim

deeper.HegrowlsandIfeelhimtwitchinsidemeasIeruptaroundhimatthesametime.Warmrelease

fillsmeandIpullhisheadbacktoallowmetowatchhim.“Lookatme.”

Hiseyesfixateonmine,wideanddilatedashestillsandexhalessharply.Blinkingheavily,he

dropshishead.“JesusChrist,”hesays.Hisforeheadisbeadedwithsweatandhishairisarighthotmess

whichmakesmesmile.NoonecanpullofftheIjustgotfuckedhairlikeReese.Iamplaceddownonmy

feetandhavetokeepmyarmsaroundhimtosteadymyself.

“Wow.Youmighthavetocarrymeoutofhere,”Isaythroughalaugh.Hegrinsandstudiesmeashe

tuckshimselfaway,watchingmepullmydressdown.

“Icoulddothat.”Hemovesquicklytohisdeskandgrabsafewtissues,droppingdowninfrontof

meandwipingbetweenmylegs.Hediscardstheminthetrashbinandreturnsinfrontofme,brushingthe

strandofhairthatfellfrommybunawayfrommyface.

I’mcertainIlookthoroughlyfuckedbutdon’tcareintheleast.ThismanownsmybodyandIwill

lethimuseitwhereverandwhenever,andthethoughtsuddenlyfrightensme.Iswallowloudlyandback

upabit.“Ithinkyourmeetingmayhavestartedwithoutyou.”Imakesuremydressiscoveringeverything,

glancingbehindmequickly.Hishandstillsonthedoorhandle,gettingreadytoturnitwhenhelooksover

atme.

“Iwanttoseeyoutonight.”Hisvoiceislow,hiseyeshoodedasifhe’sbracinghimselfformy

reaction.

IstudyhimforasecondbeforeIrespond.“Butyoujustsawme.”Iwanttoseehimtoo,Iwantto

seehimeverysecondofeverydaybutIcan’t.I’mnotstrongenoughforthat.

Hemovesclosertome.“Iknow.IstherearulethatsaysIcan’tseeyoutwiceinoneday?”

“Shouldn’ttherebe?”Myquestionhangsintheairbetweenusforamomentbeforehenodsin

agreement.AndthenIseeit,theshiftinhisexpressionthatmakesmystomachtense.Helooksnervous

anduneasy.WashestrugglingwiththisasmuchasIwas?Isn’tthiswhathewanted?Idon’taskbutI

hateseeinghimlikethis,soIstepincloserandslidemyarmsaroundhiswaist,plantingakissonhisjaw

asheholdsmeagainsthim.

“Ijust,Idon’twanttogettooattached.”BecauseI’mfallinginlovewithyouanditwillkillme

whenyou’redonewithme.

Heclampshislipstogetherandnodsbeforeplantingakissonmyforehead.“Iknow.Comeon,

prettygirl.Ihaveameetingtorun.”Istandonmytoesandplantquickkissesonhislipsashelaughs

againstmymouth.Seriousconversationover,playfulReeseback.

Swinginghisofficedooropen,heplaceshishandonmylowerbackandushersmeoutintothe

receptionareaanddownthehallway.MyeyesbrieflyfallonlittleMissUppity,herexpressioncoldas

usualbutIdon’tlinger.IlaughundermybreathandReeselooksdownatme.“Somethingfunny?”He

stopsinfrontoftheconferenceroomdoorandturnstome.

“Yourreceptionistiskindofabitch.”

Hechuckles.“Ignoreher.”Pullingmeinforalastingkiss,thedooropensbutIdon’tregisterituntil

afterhehasbrokenourcontact.Iwobble.ThismancanmakemeweakinthekneesifIevencaredabout

havingkneesanymore.Thesoundofathroatclearingcausesusbothtolookintotheroomatthetablefull

ofmen,Ianstandingatthedoorandwearinghisbiggestsmile.“Caughtya.Comeon,man,weneedtoget

started.”IfeelmyfaceflushasReesestraightenshistiequicklyandgrabsthebackofmyhead,pulling

meintohimforaquickkissinmyhair.

“Bye,love,”hewhispers.

“Bye,handsome.Gocrunchsomenumbersorauditsomethingorwhateverthefuckitisyoudo.”He

shakesagainstmewithlaughterandpullsback,winkingbeforehewalksintotheroom.Myeyesquickly

scanthetableformyemptybakeryboxeswhenIstoponafamiliarsmirkthatisplasteredonthefaceof

themanwhohadpickedupthetartsforhisfatherlastweek.Hiseyesrakeovermybody,slowandsleazy

likeandIsuddenlyfeeldirtyasIanclearshisthroat,earningmyattention.

“Bye,Dylan,”hesaysandIwaveawkwardly,turningonmyheelsandhearingthesoundofthe

doorsclosebehindme.

Whatthefuckwasthatguydoinghere?Andwhythehelldidhestareatmelikethat?

Iridethe

elevatorsdownandmarchpurposelythroughthelobbyasmymindraces.IfindJoeyoutsideinthevan

talkingonhisphoneasIhopinthedriver’sseatandstartitup.

“Okay,baby.Iloveyoutoo.Bye.”Heendshiscallandlayshisheadbackdramaticallyontothe

seat.“I’mindeep,cupcake.”

“Icantell,”Ireplyplayfully.“YouarenotgoingtobelievewhoIjustsawsittinginthemeeting.”

Afterwaitingaminuteforeffect,Joeymotionswithhishandsformetohurrythefuckupwithmy

informationasIdrivedownthestreet.“Thatguythatgavemehiscardtheotherdayintheshop.The

cockyonewhopickedupthetarts.”

Ihearhissharpbreathintake.“Areyouserious?Whatthehellwashedoingthere?Doeshework

there?Holyshit,arehimandReeseco-workers?”

Thesearethesamequestionsthatarerunningthroughmymind.“Idon’tknow,Ididn’tgettoask.I

reallyhopenotthough.Assholestaredatmelikehewantedtoeatme.”Ifeelachillrunthroughmeatthe

memoryofit.

“That’sprobablybecausehedoes.Hewasn’tshyaboutwantingyoulastweekandI’msureseeing

youagainwithReese’sdickinyourmouthdidn’thelp.”

Iscowlathim.“Christalmighty,Joey,hejustsawmekisshim.”Infact,everyonesawmekisshim.

“Okaysoyou’rekindofanexpertatthewholecasualsexstuffright?Haveyoueverseenaguythatyou

arejustfuckingmorethanonceinthesameday?Imean,doyouspaceoutthetimesyouspendtogetheror

doyoujustsayfuckitandseehimwheneveryoubothfeellikeit?”

Joeychucklesbeforeheanswers.“Honestly,whenI’vedonethejustsexstuffbefore,wesaweach

otheroftenbecausewewantedtofuckoften.Ithinkaslongasyoubothcankeepyourselvesfromgetting

toowrappedupinit,thereshouldn’tbethatmanyrules.”Heslipshisphoneoutofhispocketandbegins

messingwithit,endingourdiscussion.

IcontemplateJoey’sexplanationtomeaswedrivetotheshop.Thereshouldn’tbetoomanyrules?

Ifeltlikeruleswereextremelynecessary,atleastformetobeabletodothissuccessfully.Thereare

certainthingsthatjustcan’thappenbetweenReeseandme.Likesleepoversandmeetingeachother’s

familiesanddoinganythingtooromanticorintimate.Keepingmyselffromgettingtoowrappedupinhim

isthebiggeststruggleofmylifebutimmenselyworthit.Iwanttodothiswithhimmorethananything

becauseIlovebeingwithhim.Thealternative,endingthisbecauseit’stoohardformesentapainthrough

mybodyattheveryideaofit.Ifanyoneisgoingtofuckthisupbetweenus,it’sgoingtobeme.Heisn’t

goingtointerpretthingsthewaytheyaren’tmeanttobeinterpretedandheisn’tgoingtogettooattached

soneithershouldI.He’susedtonotdoingserious,andeventhoughI’mnot,Icankeepup.I’mdetermined

tomakethisworkandIwill.Ijustneedtostopactinglikeastupidgirlaboutit.

IcloseduptheshoponTuesdaynightat6:00p.m,sayinggoodnighttoJoeyafterhehelpedmeput

anyuneatengoodiesaway.MymindhadbeenonReeseallafternoonandIwasachingtobewithhim,and

notjustforsex.Iwantedtotalktohimandplaywithhim.Ijustwantedtoseehim.Andhewantedtosee

me.Ihadoriginallyplannedonspendingmynightwatchingtelevisionortakingalongbath,butneither

oneofthoseoptionssoundedappealinganymore.Istoppedfightingitandquicklymadeupmymind.

Slippingoffmyapronandgrabbingmypurseandkeys,Ilockeduptheshopbehindmeandstrolled

towardsSam.

DrivingtoReese’sbuildingwasaneasyroutefromthebakery.HelivedinPrinter’sRowwhich

wasjustsouthofdowntownChicago,amerefiveminutesaway.Iwasveryfamiliarwiththearea,having

cateredtoseveralbusinessesinthetrendyupscaleneighborhood.Ilikedthispartofthecity,andtold

myselfthatIreallyshouldcomedownheremoreoftenasIparkSamdownthestreetabitandlockhim

up,beginningtheshortwalktothefrontofthecondos.

Ipracticallysprintofftheelevatoranddownthehallway,stoppingsharplyinfrontofReese’sdoor

andlookingdownatmyflusteredstate.Youwouldthinkbythewaymyskinistinglingthatithasbeen

dayssinceIlastsawhim.Slippingmyphoneoutofmypocket,Ismileandquicklytypeamessage.

Me:Ireallywanttoseeyoutonight.Isthereanywayyoucould

stopwhateveritisyou’redoingandcometomyplace?

Iwaitpatientlyandthenathoughthitsmethatmakesmefeellikeacompletejerkoff.Whatifhe

isn’thome?Whatifhe’sathisofficeoroutsomewhereandisgoingtoleavetogotothebakeryand

I’mnotthere?Shit.Butjustasmybloodpressurestartselevatingtoacrazyheight,hisdoorswingsopen

andIsmileatthesightofhimtypingonhisphonewithonehand,hiskeysintheother.Myphonebeeps

andhequicklyglancesup,hislipspartingandasharpbreathescapingatthesightofme.I’mstillinmy

pinkdressfromearlier,butnowmyhairisdownanditframesmyfaceinsoftwaves.Ashiseyestakeme

inithitsme.ReesehadstoppedwhateveritwasthathewasdoingtocometomeandIknewthatIwould

havedonethesameifhehadasked.AndIamdonetryingtoconvincemyselfotherwise.

Twelve

“Dylan,hi.Ididn’t,Ithought…”

Iliftupmyhandtostophim.“Holdon,Ijustgotatextfromthiscrazyhotguy.Itmightbe

important.”HeleansagainstthedoorandbeamsatmeasIswipeacrossmyscreenandfailmiserablyat

holdingbackmyridiculoussmile.

Reese:I’llalwaysstopwhateveritisI’mdoingtocometoyou.

Ohman.

Itiltmyheadandsteptowardshim,kissinghimbrieflyonthelipsbeforeIturnawayfrom

him.“Gotmyfix.Seeya.”Isayandyelpashishandsgripmearoundmywaistandliftmeup,pullingme

backagainsthimashecarriesmethroughhisdoorway.“Putmedownyoubarbarian.”Ilaughandhe

shiftsmesothatIamnowhangingoverhisshoulder,myfaceinhisperfectass.Ismackitloudlyandfeel

hishandpinchmineashewalksmethroughhiscondowhichIamnowgettingmyfirstreallookat,of

courseit’sallupsidedownatthemoment.Stoppingfinally,heslidesmedownhisbodyandplacesmy

feetonthefloor.

“You’rehere,”hestatesasIgivehimaquickonceover.He’swearingsweatpantsandaT-shirtand

looksentirelytoosnuggly.Ireachupandrunmyfingersthroughhishairashesmilesdownatme,the

littlelinespoppingoutnexttohiseyes.

“Iam,andthankGodsoareyou.Ipanickedthatmaybeyouwereoutonahotdateorsomething.”

Helooksatmecuriouslyandrunshisfingersalongmyjaw.“NohotdatetonightI’mafraid.And

whatexactlyareyoudoinghere?Ithoughtweshouldn’tseeeachothermorethanonceinthesameday?”

Ishrugandstepbackfromhim,glancingaroundthemassivelivingareathatwearestandingin.

ThishastobethenicestcondoI’veeverbeenin.“Iwasfeelingrebellious.WhatwereyoudoingbeforeI

gothere?”MyeyesfallonthecouchthatIamveryfondofashishandswraparoundmywaist,pullingme

backagainsthim.

“WatchingTVonmyfavoritecouch.”Hereachesaroundandplantsakissonmyear.“Wouldyou

liketojoinme?”

“Ithoughtmaybewe’dplayagame.Doyouhaveanycards?”

HereleasesmeanddisappearsdownthehallwayandintoaroomwhileIturnandsitonthearmrest

ofthecouch.Reemergingmomentslater,hetossesmethedeckandIstandupandwalktohisrounddining

table,pullingoutachairandsittinginit.HesitsacrossfrommeandIblowhimakiss.

“Handsome.”Ipullthecardsoutandbeginshufflingthem.

“Love,whatgameareweplaying?”Heleansbackinhischair,hisshirttighteningacrosshisbroad

chest.Whothehelllooksthisgoodinsweats?

IthinkforamomentbeforeIreply.“Iactuallydon’tthinkithasanamesoI’lljustexplainitto

you.”Istandupandwalkaroundthetable,pullingmychairsothatitisnownexttohisandsitdown.He

turnshisbodytowardsmeandbeginslightlyrunninghisfingertipsovermybareknee.Iplacethestacked

deckfacedownonthetableinfrontofus.

“So,wetaketurnsdrawingcards,eachsuitrepresentingsomethingdifferent.Heartsarekissing,

diamondsareoral,clubsarestimulationusingyourhands,andspadesaremassages.”Hiseyebrowsraise

andhelickshisgrinninglips.“Thenumbersonthecardsrepresenthowmanysecondsyougettodothat

activity,forexample.”Ipullthetopcardandturnitinmyhand,showingthefiveofhearts.Leaningin,I

pressmymouthagainsthisandswipemytongueacrosshislipsashemoveswithme.Isavorhisminty

tasteforfivewellworthitsecondsandthenbreakaway,placingmycarddownonthetable.“OhandI’ve

keptthejokersin.Youpickoneofthoseandyougettofuckme.”

Herubshishandstogethereagerly.“Notimelimitonthefucking?”Droppinghishandontopofthe

deck,hewaitsanxiouslyformyresponsewitharaisedbrow.

“No,butIwouldliketoplayalittlebeforewegetcompletelylostineachother,soI’mhoping

neitheroneofusdrawsoneforatleastacoupleturns.”

Helookslikeheisabouttorespondbutquicklyshakeshisheadashepicksupacard.Idanceinmy

seatasheshowsittome.“Diamondsarewhatagain?”

“Oral.”Ileanbackinmychairandspreadmylegsasheamusinglykneelsdowninfrontofme.He

looksjustasenthusiasticaboutthisasIam.

“Countitout,”hesays,slippingoffmypantiesandtuckingthemintohispantspocket.

“IwillbegettingthosebackbeforeIleave,”Istate,prayingthathe’llactuallyrefuseme.

“Goodluckwiththat.”Buryinghisheadbetweenmylegs,IwaittostartthecountuntilIfeelthe

firstlick.

“Ohwow.One,two,threeeee.”HesitsupandlickshislipsasIreachtheendofmycount.“Stupid.

Ishouldhaveremovedallcardswithnumericalvalueslessthanten.”

“Youshouldhave.Threesecondsbetweenyourlegsisnotnearlyenoughtimeforme.”

Pickingmycard,IstandupandwalkbehindhimasIdropitintohislap.“Countplease,”IsayasI

beginmassaginghisupperbackandshoulders.

“MmmmOne,two,three,four,five…”HisnumberstrailoffasIrubdownhisarms,digginginto

hismusclesandofferingtheperfectamountofpressure.Iwillnevergettiredoftouchinghim.He’s

extremelyresponsivetoeverylittlemovementofmyhands.Imovearoundfrontandtakemyseat,pulling

hishandsintomineandkneadinghispalmswithmythumbs.“Ten.”Slowlyopeninghiseyes,helooksat

me,completelyrelaxedandborderlinesleepy.“Iloveitwhenyoudothat.”

IkisseachpalmbeforeIdropthem.“Iknowyoudo,andIlovedoingit.Youlooksofreakingcute

whenyou’rerelaxedlikethat.”

Hepickshiscardandquicklysticksitbackintothemiddleofthedeck.

“Hey.Whatwasthat?”Iaskthroughalaugh,tryingtograbthedeckashebrushesmyhandsaway.

“SomethingthatI’mnotreadyforyet.Backoff,Sparks.”Drawinganothercard,heflicksitatme

anditlandsonmydressfaceup.“Hands?”

Inodthroughaclosedlippedgrin.Reachingoutandpullingmeintohislapinonequickmotion,my

backagainsthischest,hisfingersrunuptheinsideofmythighandbetweenmylegs.“Reese.”Iletmy

headrollbackagainsthis.

“Count,love.”Heslipstwofingersinsidemeandbeginsrubbingmyspotwithhisthumbinhis

perfectrhythm.

Iswallowloudly.“One,two,JesusChrist,three,six,Reese.”Helaughsintomyearandslowly

pullsoutasIgroaninprotest.“Ifuckinghatethisgame.Weshouldhavejustplayedstrippoker.”Icross

myarmsovermychestafterreclaimingmyseat.

Hequicklysucksonhisfingersbeforehepicksanothercardandhandsittome.“Ilikeit.”

Isnatchthecardawayfromhimandglanceatitquickly,smilingatmyself.“Notforlong.You’re

abouttohatethisgameasmuchasIdo,Carroll.”Turningthecardinmyhand,Irevealthefourof

diamonds.“Pullitout,Idon’thaveallnight.”

Hiseyeswidenashereachesintohispantsandpullsouthiscock,holdingitatthebase.He’s

impossiblyhardalreadyasIkneelbetweenhislegs.Leaninginandplantingakissonthehead,Ihearhis

breathingquickenattheanticipation.

“Countplease,”IsaybeforetakinghiminasfarasIcan.Imoanagainsthisskinandfeelthe

musclesofhislowerbodytense.

“FUCK,one,two,Dylan,ohGod,pleasedon’tstopat---”

“Four,”IsayasIgiveonelastkisstotheheadandsitbackintomychair.

“Fuckthisgame,”hegruntsandpullsmeontomyfeet,turningmearoundsothatI’mfacingthe

table,hischesttomyback.“Iwantthisdressoff.”

Reachingdownwithshakinghands,Igrabthebottomofmydressandpullitovermyheadinone

quickmotion,leavingmestandingcompletelynaked.Hishandsreacharoundandcupmybarebreasts,

pullingatmynipplesasIarchintohisgrip.

“Ineedyou.”

“God,Dylan.Doyouhaveanyfuckingcluewhatyou’redoingtome?”Hisvoiceisstrainedandhis

breathishotagainstmyhair.OnehandleavesmybreastandgripsmyhipandIfeelhimbetweenmylegs,

positioninghimselfatmyentrance.I’mcompletelysoakedandreadyforhimbuthedoesn’tenterme.

Placingmypalmsflatonthetable,Ileanforwardandfeelhismouthonmyback,histongueandlips

caressingtheskinonmyspine.MyelbowsareshakingandIcanbarelyholdmyselfstill.

“Reese,please.”Ineedhiminmeandwiggleagainsthim,feelinghishitchedbreathagainstmy

back.Hishandthatisholdingmybreastrunsdownmytauntstomachandrestsbetweenmylegs.

“You’reallIthinkabout,”hewhisperssosoftlythatIbarelyhearitovermypanting.ButI

definitelyhearit.Histhumbbeginsmovingagainstmyclitasherubsagainstmyentrancewithhis

erection.“Dylan.”

“You’reallIthinkabouttoo.”Idropmyheaddown,somehowfeelingevenmoreexposedthanjust

beingnakedinfrontofhim.Hishandgripsthebackofmyneckandrollsmeforward;givinghimtheangle

heneedstopushintome.Wecryouttogetheratthatfirstdriveandhestartsmoving,harderandharder,

fasteragainstmewithsuchforcethatIthinkImightsnapinhalf.Bothhandsmovetomyhipsandpullme

againsthim,allowinghimselfdeeperentryandhittingeverynerveinmybody.

“Reese.OHGOD.”Ishakeagainsthim,pushingagainsthiseverythrust.Onearmwrapsaroundmy

waistandpullsmebacktohim.He’sstillwearinghisshirtanditslidesagainstmyskin,risingupwith

eachmovementsomoreandmoreofhisbarechestisfeltagainstmyback.Histightmusclesflexagainst

me,thearmholdingmywaistcontractingagainstmystomach.Ireachabovemeandwrapmyonehand

aroundhisneck,theothergrippingtightlyontothearmaroundmywaist.He’ssopowerful,everypartof

himandnotjustthewayhemovesduringsex.He’sincompletecontrolofeverypartofmeandeverything

wedotogether.Fuckfeminism.IneedReesemorethanIneedmynextbreath.Hiswordsringoutaround

me,tellingmehowgoodIfeel,hownothinghaseverfeltlikethis,howhecan’tgetenoughofme.

Everythinghesaysgetsmecloser.

“Comeforme,love.”

“OhGod,YES.”Mycoreignitesandstrikeseverynerveinsideofmeaswereleasetogether,his

nameonmylipsasIfallforwardandsprawloutnakedontohistable.Hestaysinme,hisheadrestingon

themiddleofmybackashisbreathwarmsmyalreadyheatedskin.Weremainjustlikethisforminutes,

neitheroneofuspullingorpushingawayfromtheother.Theonlysoundsfillingthecondoisour

breathing.Ifinallybegintowiggleagainsthimandhekissesmequicklyonmybackbeforepullingout,

allowingmetostandandstretchmymuscles.

“Iwasgettingtheworstcramp.Wouldhavebeentotallyworthitthoughjustfortherecord,”Isayas

hepicksmydressupoffthefloorandsmilesdownatme.StudyingitquicklyinthemostadorableReese

way,heholdsitovermyheadandallowsmetoslipbackintoit,kissingmequicklyonmylipsasmy

headpopsthroughthetop.

“Stayhere,”heordersbeforeturningandwalkingdownthehallwayandthroughadoorway.He

walksbackoutandstepsintoanotherroombutnowwithsomethinginhishand.Thesoundofrunning

waterpeaksmycuriosityandI’mabouttofollowhimwhenhereemerges,carryingawashclothinone

handandsomethingelsefoldedupintheother.Droppingtohiskneesinfrontofme,Iyelpatthechilled

cottonashewipesbetweenmylegs,cleaningoffwhathegaveme.“Here,stepin.”Iglancedownashe

holdsopenapairofhisboxers.

“Well,thiscouldhavebeenavoidedifsomeonedidn’thaveapantyfetish.”Heshimmiesthecotton

blendupmythighsandwinksatme.Grippingthewaistband,Irollthemuntiltheybecomeveryshortand

lookliketinyboybriefs.Mmmpleaseletmekeepthese.

“YesbutifIwouldn’thavetakenthem,Iwouldn’tbestandingherelookingatyourhotlittleassin

myboxers.”Hereachesaroundandsmacksme.“Hungry?”heasksjustasmystomachgrowls.

Iembarrassinglypushagainstitandhesmirks.“Yeahwell,Ididn’tputmuchthoughtintodinner

sinceIrushedoverheresotechnically,it’syourfaultIdidn’teat.”Iwalkovertothecouchandplop

downsidewayssothatmybarefeetarerestingonthecoldleather

“Ohisthatright?”hesaysasIhearmovementinthekitchen.Idecidenottolookandlethim

surprisemeasIgrabtheTVremoteandbeginflippingthroughthechannels.Istoponacookingshowand

watchwithinterestasthehostbeginsflatteningoutpastrydough.“Doyoulikespaghetti?”

“Yes,Iloveit.Areyouactuallygoingtocookmedinner?”Irestthesideofmyheadontheleather

andplaywiththehemofmydress.

“I’mgoingtoheatitup.Ohbytheway,theguysatthemeetingtodaylovedyourtreats.”The

microwavedingsandIsmile.“Thoseapplethingswereinsane.Iatelikefourofthem.”

IradiatefromwhereIsitandthenthethoughtofthemeetingbringsbackthesmirkthatI’dreceived

beforeIleft.“Hey,therewasthisguyinyourmeetingtodaythatcameintomyshoplastweek.”Iclosemy

eyesandtrytopicturehisbusinesscard.“Umm,weirdfirstname.Cocky.Thinkshe’swayhotterthanhe

is.”

Reeseroundsthecouchwithtwobowlsandhandsmeonebeforehesitsdownnexttomyfeet.

“Bryce?”

InodasItakeinamouthfulofspaghetti,moaningsoftlyaroundmyfork.

“Whatabouthim?Thinkshe’shotterthanheis,that’sfunny.”

Irollmyeyesandchewupmybite.“Thisisreallygood.Didyoumakethis?”Hesmilesandnods

ashetakesamassiveforkful.“Anyway,hedoesn’tworkwithyoudoeshe?Imean,ifIweretocomeand

seeyouatwork,wouldhebethere?”

Hechewsuphisbiteandshakeshishead.“No.He’saninvestorandIhavetodealwithhisstupid

assoccasionallybuthedoesn’tworkinmybuilding.Why,didhedosomething?Ifhefuckingtouchedyou

Dylan…”

SlurpinginmynoodlesIholdupmyhandtostophim.“No,hedidn’ttouchme.Jesus,hulk,relax.”I

earnmyselfasternlookandquicklyswallowmybite.“Hejustcameintotheshoplastweekandasked

meformynumber,whichIdidn’tgivehim,andIdidn’tlikehowhelookedatmetoday.”

Hiseyesnarrowandhisforkstillsinhisbowl.“DidhelookatyouthewayIlookatyou?”

Iswallowmybite.“No.Youdon’tmakemefeellikeI’mbeingmentallytakenadvantageof.Buthe

doesn’tworkwithyousodon’tworryaboutit.”

Hiseyesquicklyflicktomine.“Ifhecomesintoyourshopagain,Iwanttoknowaboutit.”

Myeyeswiden.Ohforfuck’ssake.“Don’tyouthinkthat’salittleextreme?”Iplacemybowlinto

mylap.Washeseriouslygoingtoinjureeverymanthatlookedatmetwice?Ishealwaysthis

possessivewithhisflings?

“No.”Heputshisbowlbackdown.Turninghisbodytowardsme,hepullsmyfeetintohislapand

hisgreenstareburnsintomine.“Ihaveahugefuckingproblemwithguysputtingtheirhandsonyouor

makingyoufeeluncomfortable.Don’taskmenottoreacttothat.”

Ileanforwardandgrabhisbowl,seeingonesideofhismouthcurveupasIgetaforkfullandhold

itouttohim.

“You’renotgoingtofightmeonthis?”heaskssuspiciouslybeforetakingthebiteoffthefork.

“NoIgetit.Iwouldslapabitchifsheputherhandsonyouormadeyouuncomfortable.”His

mouthfulmuffleshislaughashegrabshisbowlfromme.“Butjustsoyouknow,Icanhandleassholes

likeBryce.Ijustdidn’twanttohavetorunintohimwhenIcomeseeyouatwork.IfIcomeseeyouat

work.”Igrabmybowlandpullanotherbiteintomymouth,wigglingmyfeetinhislap.

“If?No,Idon’tthinkso.Ilikewhenbetter.”

“YouonlysaythatbecausebothtimesthatI’vebeenthere,you’vegottenoff.Itmustbenicetohave

orgasmsduringyourworkhours.”Imovemyfootandrubitagainsthim,feelinghimtwitchunderme.

Hearcheshisbrow.“YouknowdamnwellthatifIcouldescapemyofficetomakeyoucome

behindthatbakerycounterofyours,I’ddoit.AndIdon’tjustlikeyoucomingtomyworktoblowmeor

getfuckedagainstmydoor.”Iloudlyslurpanoodleintomymouth,makinghimlaugh.Myringtonesounds

throughthecondoandIhopup,grabbingitoffthekitchentableandexhalingnoisilyatthenameonthe

screen.Ohgreat.

“Hey,Mom.”Iplopbackdownonthecouchandsqueezethetopofmynose.Ihaveanawful

feelingthatI’mgoingtoregretansweringthiscallrightnow.

“Sweetheart.Howareyou?I’vebeenmeaningtotalktoyousincetheweddingbutyourfather---”

“Herfatherwhat,Helen?Herfatherwhat?”OhLordhelpme.Myparentsarenotoriousforboth

stayingonthelineduringourconversations.“Youknowdamnwellwhat,Bill.Anyways,dear,areyou

homebecausewe’reonlyfiveminutesaway.”

“Mom,I’mfine.Theweddingwasfinebutno,I’mnothomerightnow.”Ithasbeenafewweeks

sinceI’veseenmyparentsandIdidwanttocatchupwiththem,butnowisnotthetime.NotwhileIsit

nexttoReese.

“Justfine?”heasksbesideme,earninghimselfarightshove.“I’msurewhenyouwerescreaming

mynameitwasmorethanjustfineinthatmoment.”

“I’mgoingtomurderyou,”Imumblethroughclenchedteethasheeyesmeupwithhiswickedgrin.

Icanfeelmyheartbeatingrapidlyandcursemyselffornotlettingthisshitgostraighttovoicemail.

“Wellwhereareyou?We’reintheneighborhoodandwanttoseeouronlychild.AreyouatJuls’

house?Weknowwherethatis,”MomsaysandIhearthesoundoftrafficthroughthephone.

“No,Mom,I’mnotatJuls’house.I’mat…”MyeyesflicktoReesewhoisanxiouslywaitingfor

myexplanation,devouringhisspaghettiwithaplayfulgrin.

“Wouldyoulikemetotellyourmotherwhereyouare?”heasks,reachingforthephone.

Iquicklyturnawayfromhimandgetoutofhisreach.Wellthisisjustperfect.“I’mataguy’s

house.CanIcallyoulater?”

“Aguy?Whatguy?Oh,hunny,didyoumeetsomeone?What’shisname?Canwemeethim?Isit

serious?Whatdoeshedo,Dyl?OhI’msogladyoufoundanewboyfriend.”“He’snotademocratishe?”

MydadaddsandIwanttocrawlintoaholeanddie.MymotherhasbeentryingtomarrymeoffsinceI

wasnineteen.Shewantsgrandbabiesandshewantedthemyesterday.

“OhmyGod,canIpleasecallyouback?”BeforeIcancomprehendwhat’shappening,Reesegrabs

thephoneoutofmyhandandstandsup,placingittohisear.OhGod,no.Myeyeswidenandmyjawhits

thecouchasIslowlywatchmyworldimplode.

“Mrs.Sparks?ThisisReeseCarroll,yourdaughter’sboyfriend.”Irunathimandknockhimoffhis

feet,sprawlinghimoutonhisbackasheholdsmeatarm’slength.Doesthemanhaveadeathwish?He

seemscompletelyunaffectedbymymoveandjustgivesmeaslygrin.“OhandMr.Sparks.It’ssoniceto

talktoyouboth.”

“Givemethephone,Reese.”Igruntandtrytomovearoundthearmthatisholdingmeawayfrom

him.JesusChrist.Whydoeseverymaleinmylifethinkit’sokaytotakethephoneawayfromme?

“Giveit.”Myeffortsareuseless,onlymakingmeoutofbreathwhilehebeamsupatmelikethegorgeous

godthatheis.

“Yessheisveryspecial,isn’tshe?”

“Youarenevergettinglaidagain.”

“Thatsoundswonderful.”Helaughsintothephone.Iglareathimandhewinksatme.Jerk.“I’ll

tellDylantosetitup.Ilookforwardtomeetingyoutoo.Okayheresheis.”Hesmilesinhisminor

victoryovermeandholdsoutthephone.“Hereyougo,love.”

Snatchingitawayfromhimwithonehand,Igivehimthefingerwiththeother,asIstandupand

begintopace.Hestaysonthefloor,tuckinghishandsbehindhisheadandfollowsmewithhiseyes.

“Hello?”Iaskandbracemyselfformymother’srant.Isitdownonthearmofthecouchandrubmy

templewithmyfreehand.

“Ohmy.Hesoundslovely,sweetheart.Andsopolite.”

Ishakemyhead.“WellIwouldn’tgettooattachedifIwereyou.I’mplottinghisslowdeathaswe

speak.”Reesestandsupandmovestowardsme,brushinghishandovermychestbeforehewalksdown

thehallway.Ishudderatthecontact.

“Ohhush.Anywaysdarling,sinceyou’rebusywithyourboyfriendwe’llhavetoseeyouanother

time.Loveyoulots.”“Loveyou,sweetheart,”Dadsays.

“Bye,loveyoutoo.”Ipressendandslipmyfeetbackintomysandals,walkingmyselfovertothe

tabletoretrievemykeys.Great.MyparentsthinkReeseismyboyfriend.They’llwanttomeethimnow.

Justfuckinggreat.Myheadisspinningandit’sofficiallytimetogohomebeforehedecidestogothrough

allmycontactsandexplainoursituationtoeachandeveryoneofthem.

“PleasetellmeIdidn’tpissyouofftothepointofyouleaving?”HisvoicewashesovermeasI

turnandseehimwalkingslowlytowardsme.Hissweatshanglooselyonhishipsandthetiniestamount

ofskinisnowondisplayunderhisT-shirt.Damnhimandhisbody.

“Whythehellwouldyoutellmyparentsthatyou’remyboyfriend?Areyouinsane?Doyouhave

anyideatheamountofphonecallsI’mprobablygoingtogetnow?SinceJustin,I’vebeenabletolimitmy

mothertoonceaweekcheck-ins.Butnow,she’llneverleavemealone.”

Stoppinginfrontofme,hepushesthehairbackthatfelloutofmybunandgripsmyheadbetween

hishands.MyfaceisstuckinscruncheduphateReesemodebutitisquicklyfadingduetohissoftness,

andhishotness,andhisoverallReeseness.StaystrongDylan.

“WhatshouldIhavesaid?ThatI’mcasuallyfuckingtheirdaughterandnotinarelationshipwith

her?Thatsoundsterrible.”

“Idon’tunderstandwhyyouhadtosayanything,butfine.Everytimeshecallsme,I’mjustgoingto

giveheryournumberandyoucandealwithher.”Crossingmyarmsovermychest,Istarehimdownashe

backsupandshrugshisshoulders.

“That’sfinewithme.IcandigforsomeDylandirt.”Howwashecompletelycalmandcollected

overthis?WhythehellwouldhewantmyparentstothinkthatIwasseeinghiminthatsortofway?

Flippingmykeysinmyfinger,Iturntowardsthedoor.“Everyonehasgonecrazy.It’sdecided.I’m

theonlysanepersonleftinChicago.”

HisfootstepsfollowbehindmeandIfeelhishandgrabaholdofmine.“Holdon,I’llwalkyou

out.”Heturnstowardsthepairoftennisshoesthatarebythecouchandslipsthemonquickly.

StoppinginfrontofSam,IglanceoveratReesewhoisstaringpeculiarlyatmyvehicle,nodoubt

hurtingmypreciousSam’sfeelingsintheprocess.GoodLord,wecan’talldriveRangeRovers.“Why

thehelldidyoudriveyourdeliveryvanoverhere?”Hisfingertracesthecupcakedesignonthesideashe

studiesitinhisusualReeseway.

“Um,becauseit’smyonlycar.”Iopenthedriver’ssidedoorandhopinashemovestostandby

me.

“Youdon’townaregularvehicle?”

Ishakemyhead.“No,Mr.Moneybags.IusedtodriveanoldcorollabutitbrokedownandInever

reallyhadthemoneytogetanewcarso,IjusttakeSameverywhere.ItpissesJoeyoffbutIdon’tmind.”

ReeserunshishandthroughhishairandIsigh.“Don’tyoudarehateonSam.He’sbeentheonlymanin

mylifethathasneverletmedownbesidesmyfather.”

Hesquintsatmeandleansin,brushinghislipsagainstmine.“AndmeIhope.”

“Humph.Thejury’sstilloutonyou,handsome.”IfeelhimpullbacktoallowmetoleavewhenI

griphisT-shirtandpullhimclosetomeagain,nuzzlingmyheadintomyfavoritespotonhisneck.“Just

givemeaminute.”Ihearatinylaughashishandcomesuptoholdmeagainsthisbody.EventhoughI’ma

littleirritatedandalotconfused,everythingseemstomeltawaywhenI’mclosetohimlikethis.Iinhale

deeply,allowinghissmelltorunthroughmeandhopefullyruboffenoughtotakesomeofhimhome.

“Youcanstaywithmeanddothisallnightifyouwant,”hesayssoftly.Iclosemyeyesandshake

myheadagainsthim.“Finebutjustsoyouknow,I’mnotafanofthisbullshitnosleepoverrule.”

Ipullawayfromhimandrestmyforeheadagainsthis,seeinghisseriousexpression.“Ishouldgo,”

IwhisperandhegrabsmyfaceandplantskissesalloveritasItrytocontainmyeuphoria.PlayfulReese

ishardtoletgoof,butIsomehowmanage.Closingmydoor,hewalkstothecurbandwatchesmeasI

pullaway,hisincrediblebuildslowlygettingsmallerinmyrearview.

MymindisracingasIdrivehome.SomanythingshappenedtonightthatIwasn’tanticipatingand

don’tquiteknowhowthehelltoreactto.Betweenhimdroppingeverythingtocometome,tellingmethat

I’mallhethinksabout,anddeclaringhimselfmyboyfriend,Ifeelcompletelyunpreparedforwhatto

expectoutofhimnext.Fuckmyrules.ReesehashisownsetthatheisplayingbyandI’mcompletely

oblivioustoallofthem.

Thirteen

ItpoureddownrainalldayonWednesday,preventingourusualsteadyflowofwalk-incustomers

frommakingthetrekdownFayetteStreet.IstayedbusyinthekitchenalldaywhichItendedtodomost

rainydays,whileJoeyrifledthroughmyplannertomakesurewewerepreparedforallupcomingorders.

IhadoneweddingthisweekendandtheFrey’sanniversarycaketomakewhichIdecidedtogetstartedon

afterlunchonThursday.Inbetweenmixingtheingredients,Iscrolloverthelastseveraltextmessages

betweenReeseandmyselfthathadtranspiredyesterday.Hereallyisanexpertattheflirtytextmessages

thing.IhadjustmanagedtoslipthecakeintomydoubleovenwhenJoey’svoicecomesringingthrough

theshop.

“Cupcake,youhaveadelivery,”hesingsandImovequicklypasttheworktopandthroughthe

doorway.Fredisstandinginfrontofthecounterandsmilesatme,hisgap-toothedgrinspreadingacross

hisface.

“Hi,Fred.Howareyoutoday?”Iaskashestepsuptothecounter.Fredistheonlyothermanthat

makesmyheartflutterathisappearance,andit’sonlybecausehealwayscomeswithsomethingfrom

Reese.

“I’mgreat,Ms.Dylan.Hereyougo.”Slidingabrownenvelopeacrosstomeandholdingouthis

clipboard,Isignforitandholdupmyfingertohim.Igrababakeryboxandfillitwithsomeapple

turnovers,slippingoneintoaseparatesmallbagandhandingthemouttohim.

“WouldyoupleasegivethisboxtoMr.Carrollforme?Theoneinthebagisforyou,”Isayandhis

smilemanagestogrow.

“Sure.Thanks,Ms.Dylan.Seeya,Joey,”herespondsexcitedly,turningonhisfeetandwalkingout

thedoor.“Bye,Freddy,”Joeyrepliesinhisflirtyvoice,earninghimselfaneyerollfromme.

“Seriously?He’slikesixty.”

“Ageisjustanumber,cupcake.”

Iopentheenvelopeandpulloutthetinybrowncard,myheartbeatingsoloudthatI’msureJoey

willgivemeshitaboutit.

Dylan,

Haveyouheardthesong“DoIWannaKnow?”bytheArcticMonkeys?Ican’tlistentoitanymore

withoutthinkingofyou,notthatI’mcomplainingoranything.Missyourface.

XReese

OhImisshisfaceterribly.

HandingoverthecardtoJoey,Iwatchhisexpressiongetallweepy

whilehedigshisphoneoutofhispocket.

“Idon’tthinkIknowthatsong,”Isayashedockshisphoneandhitsafewbuttons.Musicbegins

playingthroughthespeakers,musicthatinstantlyremindsmeofsex.Holyshit.Icanactuallypicture

Reesethrustingintomeatthetempo.

“Jesus,isthisit?”IaskandJoeynodsthroughagrin.

“Yup.Ifuckinglovethissong.Youshouldlistencarefullytothelyrics,cupcake.Ithinkhe’strying

totellyousomething,”herepliesashehandsmebackthecardandstartsorganizingthedisplaycase.I

leanagainstthecounter,listeningtothesongasthefrontdoorswingsopenandJulscomesbarreling

through.

“Hello,mylovies.OoohhhIfuckinglovethissong.Remindsmeofsex.”Sheechoesmythoughtsas

Inodinagreement.

“ReesesaiditremindshimofDylan.Whatyouthinkaboutthat?”Joeyasksandhereyeswiden.

“Damn.Ithinkhewantstofuckyousideways,Dyl.”

Igiggleandsmoothoutmyapron.“Wellnaturally.”Iglanceoveratmybestfriendwhoisstanding

inthemiddleoftheshop,rubbinghereyesandlookingpositivelyglowing.OnaThursday?“What’sup

withyou?”Iask.

“Nothing,Ijusthavesomethinginmyeye,”shereplies,asshekeepswipingbelowherlasheswith

bothhands.She’sreallygoingatitandIlookoveratJoeywhosemouthhasdroppedopen.

“JULS!”heyellsandstartlesmesobadIhavetogripthecounter.

“JesusChrist,Joey.What?”Iask,myeyesfallingonJulswhoisnowonlyholdingupherlefthand.

Myeyesflickbetweenmytwobestfriends,backandforth,stillfeelingcompletelylostuntilsomething

sparklesandcatchesmyattention.MyjawdropsasIfinallyfocusonwhatJoeyhasseen.Herdelicate

handisnowadornedwithashockinglylargediamondandIscream.Joeyscreams.Julsscreams.Thereis

alotoffuckingscreaminggoingon.

“You’reengaged?”Ishriekandshenodsfrantically,herhandscominguptocoverherfaceasJoey

andIroundthecounterandchargeather.“OhmyGod.”Theringisbeautifulandtotallyher.Massiveand

sparkly,theprincesscutdiamondissurroundedbysmallerdelicatediamondsandgleamsbrilliantly.Tiny

diamondsrunalongbothsidesdownthebandaswell.“Holyshit,it’sgorgeous.Whendidthishappen?

Howdidithappen?”IaskasJoeystudiestheringclosely.

“SeriouslythemostbeautifulringI’veeverfuckingseen.Damn,”hechimesinasheholdsherpetite

handinhis.

Shewipesthetearthathasstreameddownherfaceandshufflesexcitedlyonherfeet.“Lastnight.

IantookmetoGrantParkforastrollaftertherainhadletupandhedroppeddowninfrontofthat

massivefountain.Idied,rightthereonthespot.”Moretearscomedownandshequicklyrubsthemaway.

“Hetoldmehe’slovedmeforsolongandthathe’lllovemeforever.Goditwassofuckingromantic.”

MywaterworksarenowfreeflowingandturningtowardsJoey,Iseethatheisasmuchofan

emotionalwreckasIam.“You’regoingtobethemostbeautifulbride.”Imanagethroughsniffles.“I’m

assumingwe’relookingatnextSeptemberorOctoberforthebigday?”

“Fuckthatnoise.Iamnotwaitingayeartomarrythatman.We’vedecidedonSeptember17

th

.”

JoeygaspsandI’mprettysureIdoalso.I’mstunned,completelyshocked.Isshecrazy?

“That’slikethreemonthsaway,”Isayastheshopphonerings.

“Ohplease.Haveyouforgottenwhoyou’retalkingtohere?Icouldplanafabulousweddingina

monthifIhadto.”Idashbehindthecounterandgrabthephoneonthefifthring.Shewasrightthough.If

anyonecouldpulloffaspectacularweddinginthreemonths,itwasJuls.Besides,Iwasfairlycertainthat

she’salreadyplannedmostofthedetailswithoutIan’sknowledgeofit.

“Dylan’sSweetTooth,”IchirpintothephoneasJoeyandJulsexcitinglytalkaboutthewedding.

“Hi,sweetheart.”Mymom’svoiceinstantlysendsmybackrigidandIsqueezemyeyesshut.Oh

great.It’sstarting

“Hi,Mom.What’sup?”Iaskcasually.PleaseLordletherbecallingtotellmesomeonediedor

somethingelsenon-romancerelated.Maybeshe’sforgottenallaboutReese.

Ihearmufflednoisesinthebackground,mostlikelythesoundsofmyfathergettingshushed.“Oh,

nothingmuch.SohowexactlydidyoumeetReese?I’mdyingtoknowallabouthimandGoogleonlytells

yousomuch.”

“YouGoogledhim?”Ididn’teventhinkmymotherknewhowtousetheinternet.Nowshe’s

googlingthemenI’msleepingwith?Hmmm,maybeIshoulddothat.

“Yes.Goodgriefhe’shandsome.Nowtellme,howdidyoutwomeet?”Ohyouknow,henailedme

upagainstabathroomsinkatmyex’swedding.Crap.Ineedadistractionandthesightofmybouncing

bestfriendsgivesmeinspiration.

“Mom,Julsisengaged.Isn’tthatgreat?Andshe’sgettingmarriedthisSeptember.”Nothinglike

weddingnewstogetmymothersidetracked.Shewasasuckerforhardgossip,especiallywhenit

involvedmyfriends.

Shegaspsdramatically.“That’swonderful.Ohmy,that’ssosoon.”Ihearherhandsclapping

togetherthroughthephone.“Howlovely.Julswillmakesuchabeautifulbride.Youknowwhoelse

wouldmakeabeautifulbride?”

What?Shit!IscramblearoundthecounterandgrabJoeybythehair,aloudscreamemanatingfrom

himfollowedbyastringofcursewordsdirectedatme.“Ohshit.Gottago,Mom.Joey’shavingagay

emergency.Youknowhim.Loveyou.”Iendthecallquicklybeforeshecanthrowoutanyquestions.

Whew.CrisisAverted.

“Whatthefuck,Dylan?Thathurt.Andwhydoesithavetobeagayemergency?”Joeyrubshis

scalp,hisfacescrunchedupinpainasheglaresatme.

“Ha!Likethere’sanyanothertypeofemergencyinvolvingyou.”Julslaughs.

“Sorry.Reallyreallysorryaboutthat.MymomknowsaboutReeseandI’mtryingtoavoidherat

allcosts.”Iexhaleforcefully.“Youknowhowsheis.”IdecidetokeeptheReesetellingmyparentsthat

he’smyboyfriendnewstomyself.Iwouldneverheartheendofit.

“Oh,yikes,”hestates.“Actually,thatremindsme.”Hequicklycombsthroughhishair.“You

rememberhowBillythoughtitwashilariousthatyouthoughtReesewasmarried?”InodasJulsmoves

nexttomeandfacesJoey,herarmscrossingoverherchest.“Well,Ithoughtthatwasweird.Imean,why

isthatsofuckingfunny?He’sgorgeous.Hecouldhavebeenmarried.”

“Joey,isthereapointtothis?”Iask

Hehuffsinannoyance.“Yes.IaskedBillyaboutitandhesaidthatReeseiscompletelyagainst

gettingseriouswithagirl.Hewon’tdoit.”Mystomachrolls.“Whentheystartgettingclingy,hemoves

ontothenextone.”

“Joey,that’senough,”Julsspats.

Iblowmybreathout.“It’sfine.Ifiguredasmuch.”ButIwasn’texpectingittohurtthisbadtohear

itoutloud.Shit.Ifeellikemyhearthasbeenshovedintoavice.

Hemovesclosertomeandgrabsmyhand,strokingthebackofitwithhisthumb.“Dylan,I’msorry.

Ijust,Idon’twanttoseeyoutogethurt.”Hesqueezesmegently.“IlikeReese,IreallydoandIlikehim

foryou,butIdon’tknowifhe’lleverwantyouformorethanjustsex.”

Julsstepsinbetweenusandgrabsmyshoulders.“Don’tlistentohim,Dylan.I’veseenthewayhe

looksatyou.Idon’tcarehowmanygirlsareliningupforhim.Heonlyseesyou.”Shespeakssoftly,her

handsapplyinglightpressuretomytenseshoulders.Heiscurrentlyonlyseeingme,Iwantedtocorrect

her.ButIdon’t.ImanagetopaintonmymostconvincingI’mnotaffectedbythisfaceandsmile.

“It’sfine.I’mfine.Iwasn’texpectingthistobecomeafuckingrelationshiporanythingmorethan

whatitisso,whatever,I’mfine.”JulsstudiesmecloselyasJoeymanageshalfasmile.“Anyway,where

areweheadedtonighttocelebrate?”Mychangeoftopiccatchesonandtheybothstartrattlingoffnames

ofbars.“Youtwodiscuss.Ihavesomeworktodo.”

MystomachchurnsasIwalkpastmyfriendsandintothekitchen.Imagesofhundredsofwomen

walkingintoReese’soffice,closingthedoorbehindthem,andthenreemergingmomentslaterlooking

rightlyfuckedpourthroughmyhead.Howmanygirlshaveblownhiminthatoffice?Howmanyhashe

fuckedagainstthatdoor?ThethoughtofReesescrewinganybodybesidesmemakesmeinstantlyqueasy.

“God,whatthefuckamIdoingwiththisguy?”IsaytomyselfasIcheckonthecake.

Julspopsherheadthroughthedoorway.“6:00p.m.atTheTavern,sweets.Loveyou.”Shewaves

withherblingedouthandandIgiggle.

“Loveyou,”Ireplywithgenuineenthusiasmjustasmyphonebeginstoring.Reese’snameflashes

acrossmyscreenandIhitdecline.Ican’ttalktohimrightnow.Ihaveworktodoandstayingbusyismy

bestdefenseatkeepingmymindoffhim.Walkingovertotheshelf,IgrabtheingredientsIneedforthe

chocolatepeppermintfrostingandplacethemontheworktop.Ireachformymixernextasmyphonerings

throughthekitchen.Leaningacrosstheworktop,IseehisnameagainandhuffloudlyasIpressdecline.

“No,”Istatefirmly.Perchingmyselfuponastool,Ibeginriflingthroughmyrecipes.Ireallyneededto

organizethesebetter.Andrewritesomeofthem.Mygrandmother’schickenscratchhandwritingis

beginningtoruboffandmostareborderlineeligible.Hearingthetextmessagealertonmyphone,Iwipe

myhandsonthefrontofmyapronandreachforit.

Reese:Areyouignoringme?

Nomisterpersistent,I’mjustputtingsomedistancebetweenyouandmyheart.

Thesoundofthe

songthatJoeyhasapparentlyputonrepeatseepsintothekitchenandIsoften.Asongremindshimofme.

AsongthatIneedtoremembertolookupthelyricsto.Mythumbsgettowork.

Me:No,justreallybusy.Julsstoppedinandshowedoffher

massiveengagementringandnowI’mbehindonsomebaking.What’sup?

Ipresssend,pleasedwithmyselffornotberatinghimwithquestionsaboutpreviousloversand

officesexromps.I’mabouttoplacemyphonedownwhenhisnameflashesonmyscreenwithan

incomingcall.Damnit.Ican’tjustignorehimagain;heknowsI’mnottoobusytotext.Iswipethe

screen.

“Notfeelingthetextmessagingtoday?”IaskthroughasmilethatIinwardlycursemyselffor

having.Hehasn’tevenspokenyetandI’mglowing.

“NotwhenIcanhearyourvoiceinstead.Howareyoutoday,love?Anynewfavoritesongs?”The

soundofcrunchingcomesthroughthephoneandIsuspectthathe’sreceivedmyspecialdeliveryjustfor

him.

“Maybe.AndI’mokay.I’mjuststillinshockovertheengagementnews.”Iswallowthelumpinmy

throat.Christ,cheerthefuckup,Dylan.Thishotmanhaschosenyouoverallotherwomeninlineto

playwith.Hechoseyou.“So,areyoucomingouttocelebratewithustonight?IhaveafewnicknamesI’d

liketothrowatyouonceIgetallkindsoftipsy.”ThetimerontheovensoundsandIwalkovertoit,

clampingmyphonebetweenmyearandmyshouldertoretrievethecake.

HelaughssoftlyandIcanpicturemyfavoritesmilelinesnexttohiseyes.“Yeahbutprobablynot

tilllate.IhavesomestuffIneedtotakecareoffirst.”Hepausesandthesoundofcrunchingfillsthe

receiveragain.“ShouldIbeconcernedthatyou’regoingtogetshitfacedwithoutmethere?Becausea

partofmeisconcerned.Actually,isn’ttheresomerulethatsaysyoucan’tgetdrunkwithoutme?”

Ilaughandpokethecenterofthecakewithaknife,pullingitoutclean.Theideaofseeinghimina

fewshorthourshasblanketedallofmystupidgirlconcernsandI’mnowmyusualdrunkonReeseself.I

wouldn’tevenneedalcoholtonight.“Firstofall,I’mnotgoingtogetdrunk.IfIdid,Iwouldcompletely

blowmychancesofridingyoulateronbecauseIwouldpassout.”Iturntheovenoffandgrabamixing

bowlforthefrosting.“Andsecondly,myfriendsknowhowtohandlemeandknowwhentocutmeoff.I

thinkyouforgetthatI’mtwenty-sixandnottwenty-one.I’vebeendoingthisforafewyearsyouknow.”

HegruntsandIautomaticallyrollmyeyesintothephone.“Noneofwhatyoujustsaidgivesmeany

comfort.I’lljustmakesuretogetmyshitdonequicklysoIcancutyouoffmyself.”

Myhandnotholdingthephonegoestomyhip.“Ifyoustormintothatbarandthrowmeoveryour

shoulderlikesomecaveman,Carroll,wewillbehavingwordswhenIsoberup.”

“Hmm,thanksfortheidea,Sparks.”

“Reese.”ThesoundofthedialtoneblaresinmyearandIstuffmyphonebackintomypocket.Oh

forChrist’ssake.Hewoulddosomethingembarrassinglikethat.Icanjustseemyselfgettinghauledout

oftheretonightwithmyfacestuckinhisassagain.Well,twocanplayatthatgame.Ifhe’sgoingto

manhandlemeinfrontofmyfriendsthenI’lljusthavetomakesureI’mwearingsomethingtomakehim

losehisshit.That’smyonlydefensereally,causinghimtostumbleatthesightofmeandgivingme

hopefullyenoughtimetorunawayfromhim.ButdidIevenhaveanoutfitthatcouldpullthatoff?

“Joey,we’reclosingupearlysowecangoshopping.”Ibeginthrowingtheingredientsfortheicing

togetherintoabowl.Iregisterhiselatedresponseandfocusonmytaskathand.Finishmakingthe

frosting,icethecake,andblowReese’sfuckingmind.Igrinmischievouslyatmyself.Hehasnoideawho

he’smessingwith.

**

AfterperusingtheracksatLaBellaforoveranhour,Ifinallysettledonasleevelesscoraldress

withadeepvneckandexposedback.Itwasn’ttooclingy,allowingmeformovementandhidingthelines

ofmywhitegarterwithmatchingbraandpanties.Butitwasshort,reallyfuckingshort.Ihaddecidedon

thegarterimmediatelyafterourphonecallended,thatandthefactthatIwouldbepickingoutsomesort

ofdressfortheevening.ReeselookedatmedifferentlywhenIworedresses.Hestillhadthatraw

animalisticstarethatcouldmeltthepantiesrightoffme,buttherewasalsothissweetnessbehindit,a

gentlenessthatIsawwhenI’dwornthemaroundhim.HelookedatmelikeIwasdelicateandIlikedthat.

JoeyhadgottenhiscarbackfromtheshopanddroveustomeetJulsatTheTavern,notfailingto

remindmethatwebothlookedbetterinhisridethaninmine.AllthisSamhate.Iwasalreadytworum

andcokesinwhenIanandBillyshowedup,myheartpoundingattheanticipationofReese’sarrival.

“IwouldjustliketosayIanthatyoudidanamaaazziinnggjobonthering.Likefuckingbrilliant,

dude.You’relikethelordoftheringsnow.Ooohhh,you’reFrodo.”Yup.Iamdefinitelyinthenickname

givingstageofmynight.Iboparoundonmystool,tappingmyhandslightlyonthebarinrhythmwiththe

songplayingoverhead.

“Wow,howmanydrinkshaveyouhad?”heasksasJulswigglesinhislap.Shecan’tstoplookingat

herringandit’sabsolutelyadorable.I’mcertainshe’sshownittomefiftytimessincewe’vearrivedasif

Ihaven’tseenitalready.

“Psst,likenone,”Ireply.“Sohaveyoutwothoughtofahoneymoonspot?”

“Fiji!”JulsyellsandIanbarksalaugh.

“Idon’treallycare,justaslongasIgetmysexywifeinabikiniandthenquicklyoutofit,”hesays

andIfeelmyfaceflush.“Ican’tfuckingwaittomarryyou.”Hespeakssolow,Ialmostdidn’thearhim.

ButIdid.TearsfillmyeyesandImeetJuls’rapidlyblinkingteary-eyedstare.

“Ladiesroom?”Iaskandshenods.

“Babe,willyougetmeanotherdrinkplease?”sheshoutsbackatIanwhogivesheraquickwink.

Wewalkarminarmtothebathroomsandslipinside,thesoundofthebarcrowddyingdownasthedoor

closesbehindus.Steppinginfrontofthemirror,IsmoothmydressoutandfluffupmyhairasJuls

reappliesherlipstick.

“Bytheway,thisSaturdayI’mholdingyouhostageafteryourcakedelivery,”shesaysasshehands

methetubeshe’sjustused.Itakeitandshakemyhead,slowingapplyingthenudecolorontomylipsand

thenquicklywipingitoff.

Igruntinannoyance.“Ican’tpullofflipstick.Itmakesmelooklikeahooker.AndwhyamIbeing

heldhostageonSaturday?”Ihandherbackthetubeandshesticksitintoherpurse.

“Excuseyou.Maidofhonorduties.”Iscreechandjumponmyheels.“We’vegotsomedress

shoppingtodo.”Shewrapsmeupinahugaswegiggleagainsteachother.

“I’mgoingtoloseitwhenIseeyouinaweddingdress.Fairwarning,”Isayasweletgoofeach

other.

Shegrabsbothofmyhandsandbeams,takinginadeepbreathbeforesheslowlyletsitout.“I’mso

happy,sweets.Ican’tbelievehechoseme.”Shepullsherbottomlipintohermouthandbitesittostopit

fromquivering.

Isqueezeherhandswithbothofmine.“Whowouldn’tchooseyou?”Idropherhandsandturnback

towardsthemirror,wipingundermyeyes.“Is,uh,Reeseintheweddingparty?”Pleasesayyes.Thesight

ofhiminatuxissomethingIwouldpaytosee.

“Ofcourse,he’sthebestman.Whichmeansthatyoutwowillbepairedup.You’rewelcome.”She

gigglesatmeandIwatchinthemirrorasmycheeksburnup.

Weexitthebathroomtogether,Julswalkingaheadofmeandblockingmyviewbutitdoesn’tmatter.

IcouldhavebeenblindfoldedandI’dhaveknownhewashere.IalwaysfeelhispresencebeforeIsee

him.Asshestepsthroughthecrowd,myeyeslockontoReesewhoisstandingatthebartalkingtoIan.

MystomachtightensandIclenchmyfistsasIwalkslowly,studyinghimandwaitingforhimtonoticeme.

He’sinhisworkattire,dressshirtandtiewithkhakis,hishairstickingoutallovertheplaceandIdecide

thatwalkingslowlyisformorons.Pushingmywaythroughthecrowd,hiseyesturntomineandhesmiles

sweetlybeforehismouthdropsatmyappearance.Ipickupmypaceandrunstraightathim,jumpingup

intohisarmsandhearingJulsandIan’scollectivelaughsasIclingtohimlikeavine.Hissmellhitsme

andIsoftlymoan.

“Handsome,”IwhisperintohisearasIsqueezehimtightly,nointentionoflettinggoanytimesoon.

“Ithoughtyou’dnevergethere.”

“IcameassoonasIcould,love.”Heinhalesmedeeply,holdingmybodyagainsthisasIkeepa

solidgriparoundhisneck.Shiftingmeagainsthisbody,heturnsandlowershimselfontoastool,pulling

meintohislap.Ileanbackandstudyhim.Greeneyesblazing,partedfulllips,andsmilelines.Manheis

lethal.Heopenshismouthtospeakwhenhiseyestraildownmybodyandstoponmythighs.

“Fuck,Dylan.”Iglancedownquicklyatwhat’spossiblycausedhisoutburstandcurseloudlyatthe

sightofmyexposedgarter.Shit.Thisdresswasnotmeanttobesatdownin.“Whatareyouwearing?”

I’mquicklyplacedonmyfeetinfrontofhimashebeginstuggingatthematerial,franticallyattemptingto

bringitdowntoamoreappropriatelength.Thegigglingfrommecomesnaturallyathisflusteredstate.

“Areyoutryingtogivemeaheartattack?Whatthehelliswiththedress?”heasksthroughclenched

teethasIquicklyscantheredfacesofIanandJulswhoarewatchinginamusement.Joeysquealsonthe

dancefloorasBillydipshimandkisseshimdeeplyinfrontofeveryone.Therelentlesstuggingofmy

dressbringsmyeyesbackdowninfrontofme.

“Youdon’tlikeit?Ithoughtyoulikedmeindresses,”Itease.

“Thisshouldn’tbeallowedinpublic.Seriouslywhatthefuck?You’vebeenhereforhowlongin

thisshit?”Heglowersatmeandrunshishandsdownhisface,bringingmyattentiontohisrighthandthat

lookslikehe’sspentthenightdraggingitagainstbricks.Hisknucklesarecutupandslightlyswollenand

driedbloodstainshisskin.

“JesusChrist.Whatthehellhappenedtoyourhand?”Ireachforittoexamineitmorecloselywhen

hequicklypullsawayfromme.

“Don’tworryaboutit.Thedress,Dylan.Whyareyouwearingthat?”

Ohnofuckingwayishegoingtoreactlikethisandnotgivemeanyanswers.

Igrabmyclutchoff

thetableandmaketoturnawayfromhim.“Fuckyou.Iworethisforyou,youstupidasshole.”Hishand

grabsmyelbowbutIsomehowmanagetosnatchitoutofhisgrip.“Letgoofme.Howdareyoucomein

herewithyourhandlookinglikeyoubeattheshitoutofsomebodyandgivemeahardtimeaboutmy

outfit.Youhavenofuckingrighttoactlikethat.”Whatthehell?ThisisnotthereactionIwashopingto

getoutofhimforwearingthis.Ipushthroughthecrowdofpeopleandseetheexitbutfeelhishandson

mywaistbeforeIcangetveryfar.Figures.Engagebarbarianmode.Iamturnedsharplyandpulled

againsthischest,hismouthpressingfirmlytomytemple.

“Ihaveeveryfuckingrighttoactlikethis,”hegrowls.

“Noyoudon’t.Whatthefuckhappenedtoyourhand?”Ipushawayfromhimandtakeastepback,

sternlystaringhimdownforanexplanation.

Hestepsclosertome,eliminatingthegapIjustcreated.“Yourexiswhathappenedtomyhand.I

toldyouthatI’dmakesurehenevertouchedyouagainandIfuckingdid.Nowexplaintomewhythefuck

you’rewearingthat?YouknewIwouldn’tbehereuntillatersodon’tfuckingsayitwasforme.”

Imovequickly,thereisnothoughtbehinditjustpureshockandslaphimhardacrosshisface.The

soundofthecrackechoesthroughthebarbutnooneseemstopayusanymind,exceptforJulsandIan.

Apparently,loversquarrelsarecommoninestablishmentslikethis.

“AreyouactuallytryingtoinsinuatethatI’mwearingthisforsomebodyelse?Fuckyou.Youdrive

mefuckingcrazy.”IbringmyhandbackagainbutReesereachesoutandstopsit,bringingitdowntomy

sideandpullingmeagainsthim.HischestisheavingrapidlyandwhenIpressmylowerbodyagainsthis,

Ifeelhisneedformediggingintomyhip.Fuck,he’sturnedonbythis?

“Youdrivemefuckingcrazy.Now,sayyourgood-byessoIcantakeyouhomeandfucksomesense

intoyou.”Icatchmybreathathiswordsbutknowrightthen,evenbeforehesaiditthatIwantitjustas

muchashedoes.Heknowshowandwhentopushmybuttonsandhedoesitbetterthananyone.

“Juls,I’mleaving.Loveyou,”IyellbutkeepmyeyesonReese.

“Holyhell.Thatwascrazyhot.Bye,sweets,”sheyellsbackandbeforeIcanobject,I’mbeing

draggedoutofthebarbyaveryhotandbotheredCPA.ButwhoamIkiddinghere?LikeI’deverobject.

Fourteen

“IhopeyourealizejusthowpissedoffIamatyourightnow,”IsayasIsitinthepassengerseatof

hisRangeRover,watchinghimweaveeasilyinandoutoftraffic.We’vebeendrivinginsilenceforeight

long-assminutesandmyannoyancelevelisthroughtheroof.

Heturnstheradiodownandclearshisthroatbeforeglancingoveratme.“Why,becauseIdon’t

wantothermenlookingatyou?Toughshit.Thatdressshouldbeillegal.”Hishandgripsthecenterconsul

andIstareathisredcutupknuckles.

Crossingmylegsandlettingmydressrideuponpurpose,Icrossmyarmsovermychestandstare

himdown.“Whathappened?Youdidn’tkillhim,didyou?I’dpreferitifIdidn’thavetovisityouin

prison.”Although,aconjugalvisitwithReesemightbeworthJustin’sdemise.Mmmm,hecouldrock

thehelloutofsomejailattire.

Stoppingataredlight,heflexeshisinjuredhandbeforehereachesoverandslipshisfingerunder

mygarter,snappingitagainstmyskinandmakingmeyelp.“No,Ididn’tkillhimbutheprobablywishes

hewasdeadrightnow.Hewon’tbotheryouagain.”Ibathishandawaytokeephimfrompullingatitas

theredlightturnstogreen.“Didyouhavefuntonight?”

Forcingoutalaugh,Iturntohimandseeahintofteasinginhissetprofile,hisliptwitchingslightly.

“Ohyeah,Iwashavingablastuntilthiscrazymanshowedupandfreakedoutovermywardrobe

selection.Which,bytheway,wasforyoureyesonly.Youowememultipleorgasmsforthatlittletirade.”

Heletsoutalaughashepullsintotheparkinggarageofhisbuilding.“Oh,IthinkI’mtheonewho

isinneedofmultipleorgasms.Itismybirthdayafterall.”Wait,what?

“It’syourbirthday?Today?”Henodswithasmileandparksthecar,steppingoutasIstayfrozenin

myseat.Mydoorisopenedformeandhishandgrabsmine,pullingmequicklyoutofthevehicle.“Isit

really?”Themancouldbelyingjusttogethismultipleorgasms.

Hereachesinhisbackpocket,pullsouthiswalletandhandsittome.Iflipitopenandstareathis

license,whichofcoursecontainsapictureofhimlookingannoyinglygood.Whothehelltakesagood

driver’slicensephoto?Focusingonhisbirthday,Iconfirmwhathehasjustrevealedtome.

“Whydidn’tyoutellme?”Iask,handinghimbackhiswalletaswewalkintohisbuilding.Hishand

restsonmylowerbackashewalksmetowardstheelevators,noddingpolitelyatthepeoplewepass.

“Ijustdid,”hereplies,pullingmeintotheelevatorsandpressingthetenthfloorbutton.Iwrapmy

armsaroundhisneckandpressmybodyagainsthisaswerideuptohisfloor.Hisscentfillsmylungsand

Iswoon.

“Butyoushouldhavetoldmesooner.Iwouldhavemadeyouacake.It’swhatIdoyouknow.”

Hishandsgripmywaistashepressesquickkissesintomyhair.“Wellyoucanmakemeacake

now.”Thedoorsopenandhequicklypullsmewithhimdownthehallwayandintohiscondo.Jeezishe

inarush?

Flippingonthelights,Ifollowbehindhimashesetshiskeysdownonthecounterandwalksinto

thekitchen.Islipoutofmyheels,setmypursedown,andbeginrummagingthroughhiscabinets,praying

foringredients.

“Doyouhaveanyflour?”Iaskasheclosesthefridgeandhopsupontothecounter.Unscrewingthe

cap,hetakesasipofhiswaterandlookstobeindeepthought,hiseyesstaringatthecabinets.“You’rein

myspot,”IsayasIwatchhimwithamusement.

“Umm,no.Idon’tthinkIhaveanyflour.Andyes,Iaminyourspot.Butit’smybirthdaysoI’lldo

whateverthefuckIwant.”HesmirksatmeandIgiveitrightbacktohim,turningandglancingupona

highshelf.

“CanyoureachmetheBisquickplease?”IaskasIopenthefridgeandpullouttheeggs.Hehands

ittomewithakissandhopsbackup.

“Areyoumakingmebirthdaypancakes?”

Ipulloutabowlandgrabafork.“Nope,I’mmakingyoumyfouringredientbananacakethatIused

towhipupincollege.JulsandIroomedtogetherandIwouldcreatedessertsoutofwhatevercrapwehad

lyingaround.Bisquickwasalwaysonhandbecauseshe’sabreakfastjunkie.”Igrabthesugarbowland

settheoventemperature.“You’vegivenmelittlechoicehere.I’dbesetifIwantedtomakeyouacake

madeoutoframennoodlesandchunkysoup.”HewatchesmeintentlyasImashupthebananaandbegin

mixingtheingredientstogetherinthebowl,occasionallyglancingupandseeinghimstudyingme.He

alwaysseemssofascinatedbywhateveritisthatI’mdoingandIwonderifhelooksateverygirllike

this.Ugh.Thethoughtmakesmewhiptheeggsviciously.

“Soyou’rethirty-twotoday,”Istate,suckingthebatterthathassplashedupontomyknuckleoff

withasoftmoan.

“Iam.”Myeyesgotohisandhewinks.“I’msixyearsolderthanyounow.Doesthatbotheryou?”

HisquestionbafflesmesoIdecidetoreallygiveitsomethought.Ouragedifferencedoesn’tbother

meatall.IfhewastenyearsolderthanmeIwouldn’tcare.Scrunchingupmyfaceandthinkinghard,I

seehisgrinwidenashewaitsforme,asoftbreathylaughescapinghim.Ishakemyhead.“Nah,butthat’s

mainlybecauseyouacthalfyourage.”Hiseyebrowarches.“Besides,Ihaveathingforoldermen.”

Tippingthebowl,Ipourthecakebatterintohisoneandonlybakingdishandshuffleittoevenoutthe

distribution.

Hehopsdownandcomesupbehindme,hishandsspreadingacrossmystomach.“Doyou?Ihadno

idea,”hesaysashepullsmyhairoveroneshoulderandkissesdownmyneck.Iclosemyeyesandgrip

thebakingdishtightly.Lordthismanknowshowtowindmeupinnotime.

“Well,Ihaveathingforyou.”Hegrowlsintomyear,hishandsslidingupthefrontofmydressand

moldingtomybreasts.MyheadfallsbackagainsthisshoulderandIgroan.“Ineedtoputthisinthe

oven.”Hegrumblesinprotestbutfinallystepsback,allowingmetoplacethedishintotheovenandset

thetimer.

“Okay,birthdayboy,you’vegottwelveminutestoplaywithmeuntilit’sready.”Iturntoseehis

wickedgrinandhewasteslittletime,grabbingmyhandandpullingmeintothelivingroom.Stoppingin

frontofthecouch,hepullsmeintohisarmsandrunshishandsupmyspineashisfacedropstobringour

lipstogether.Heopensmymouthwithhisandsnakeshistonguearoundmine,coaxingmetomovewith

himandIobey.Myhandsfumblewithhistie,looseningitanddroppingittothefloorashismouth

assaultsmine,teasingandtastingeveryinchofme.Ifeelhisarmmusclesflexaroundmeandthenthe

soundofaloudripcomesfrombehindmeasthefabricofmydressistornfrommybody.

“Didyoujust,Ican’tbelieveyoujustdidthat.”Ispinaroundquicklyandstepbackandoutofhis

arms,seeingthehandfulofmaterialclutchedbetweenbothfistsbeforehedropsitathisfeet.Areyou

fuckingserious?“Dick.Doyouhaveanyideahowmuchthatdresscostme?”Istepintohimanddeliver

asharppoketohischestwithmyfinger.Yeah.That’llshowhim.

Hecockshisheadtothesideandnarrowshiseyesatme.“Ifyousaymorethanfivedollars,yougot

rippedoff.Thatthingwasthesizeofahandkerchief.”Hisarmswrapmeupandhetossesmeontothe

couchlikeI’msomesortofragdoll.Iyelpinprotestasthecoldleatherhitsmyskin,butamonly

momentarilychilledbeforehisbodyispressingagainstmine,warmingmeinstantly.

“Youareridiculous.WhatthehellamIsupposedtowearnowwhenIleave?”Igrumblebetween

kisses.Hismouthmetminethemomentherelaxeddownonme.Imoanashistonguedipsintomymouth,

deliveringlongstrokesagainstmineandfillingmewithhismintyflavor.“Fuck,I’msomadatyou.”I

gruntashelaughsagainstme,movinghislipsdownmyneckandlickingatrailtothetopofmybreasts.

Staymad,Dylan.Don’tgivein.Don’tloseit.Thatwasa$250dress.

“Iloveitwhenyou’remadatme.You’resofuckingsexyIcanbarelycontainmyselfhere.”He

moldshishandsovermybreastsandpullsmybradown,slippinganippleintohismouthasIgrabhis

head.“Mmmm,thesearealwaysonmymind.Sofuckingbeautiful.”Helicksandsucksme,drawingloud

moansfrommymouth.Brushinghisnoseagainstthemarknexttomyleftnipplethatisslightlyfaded,he

sucksonthesmallpatchofskin.Myhandsgriphishairandholdhimagainstme.Ihatethathismarksare

fadingonmeandammorethanhappytolethimbringthembackout.Movingtomyotherbreast,he

freshensthemarkthereandthenplantsasoftkisstoitbeforeheglancesupatme.Hissmirkmakesme

grunt.

“You’reanasshole.”Igroanashemoveslower,lickingandnibblingatmystomach.Wrappingmy

legstightlyaroundhiswaist,IpushhimupandgriphisdressshirtwithbothhandstightlybeforeIripit

apart,tinybuttonsflyingoutineverydirection.Myhandspushitoffhisbigshouldersanddownhisarms,

pullinghisT-shirtquicklyoverhishead.

“Impatientmuch?Wehaveallnight,love,”hesaysasheworkshisbelt,sittingbackbetweenmy

legs.

“Youstartedit.”Allnight?Myhandsstretchoutandrubhisrippedchest,brushingdownhis

stomachalongthetightmuscles.God,Ilovetouchingthisman.Myindexfingerplaysinthepatchofhair

thatrunsbelowhisbellybutton.“Whatdoyouwantforyourbirthday?”

Hereachesintohispants,pullshimselfoutandleansforward,rubbinghimselfalongthelengthof

mywetpanties.Igroananddigmynailsintohisback.Wasn’tImadaboutsomething?“Youinmybed,”

hesaysagainstmymouth.Ourlipsareclose,ourheavybreathingmixingtogetherandItrembleagainst

him,hiswordsbringingoutmyfears.“Nothinghastochange.Thisisstilljustsex.Ijustneedtohaveyou

inthere.”Seconds,minutesgobyandhestillsagainstme,waitingformyresponse.Idon’tknowwhatto

do.Iwanttodothisforhim,forme,morethananything.Beinginhisbed,surroundedbyhissmelland

imaginingwhatitwouldbeliketostaytherewithhimwasathoughtthatwasconstantlyrunningthrough

mymind.ButcouldIdothis?HesaidnothinghadtochangebutcouldIkeepitfromchangingforme?I

thinklongandhardandmakemydecision.Yes,Icould.Becausethisisworthit.Heisworthit.Iclose

myeyestightlyandnod,hearingasmallsoundescapehimandI’mquicklyliftedtomyfeet.Weroundthe

couchtogetherwhentheovenalarms,causingmetodashinandpullthecakeout.

“Jesus,youshouldonlybeallowedtowearthatinmykitchen,”hesaysasIinsertaknifequickly

intothetopandpullitoutclean.Glancingdownoutmyattire,IsmileathimasImeethiminthedining

roomwherehestandswaitingforme.Myhandisplacedinhisasheleadsmedownthehallwayand

opensthelastdoorontheleft.Steppingasideforme,Iwalkaheadofhimandtakeinmysurroundings.

Hisbedroomisbigandspaciouscontainingalargefourposterbedwithtwonightstandsoneach

side,atalldresserandachairinthecornernexttoasmallbookshelf.Iscurryovertoitandglanceathis

readingmaterial,alleducationalandwaythehelloutofmydepth.“Wow,you’reabiggernerdthanI

thought.”PullingoutamassivetextbookwiththewordsCorporateAccountingonthefront,Isitinthe

chairandflipthroughit,feelinghiseyesonmeashemovesintotheroom.Thesoundofhisclothing

removalcatchesmyattentionandIglanceupathimfromundermylashes.Heisnowstandingcompletely

nakedandstaringatme,holdingouthishandandarchinghisbrow.

“I’mreading,”Imutterthroughagrinandamquicklyyankedfrommychair,bookcrashingtothe

floorintheprocessasheliftsmeupandtossesmeonthebed.ThesmellofhimhitsmelikeatruckandI

whimper.Crap,thisisgoingtowreckme.Wrappinghishandaroundthebackofme,Iammovedupthe

bedsothatmyheadisrestingonhispillow,hisbodysettlingbetweenmylegs.Iwatchintentlyashe

slidesmypantiesdownandtossesthem,leavingmygarteronandtracingtheclipswithhisfingers.

“Sofuckingsexy,”hesaysagainstmythigh,kissingtheskinalongmygarter.“You’resosoft,love,

andyoualwaysshakewhenI’mrighthere.”HislipsbrushagainsttheskinofmyinnerthighandIgasp,

tremblingoncue.“IlovethatIdothattoyou.”

Iquicklyremovemybraandreachoutforhim.“Comehere.Ineedyou.”Igriphisshouldersand

pullhimupasheshiftsaboveme,pushingstraightintomeinonequickmotion.

“I’vedreamedofthis.You,inmybed.Fuck,Dylan.”Hiswordsringthroughmyearsashestrokes

mewithlongslowmovements.Pullingalmostallthewayoutbeforeheglidesbackin.Mylegstighten

aroundhimandIpullhismouthtomine,needinghiskiss,needinghisbreathonmeandinme.

“Metoo.OhGod.”

HegroansloudlyandIpullhislipintomymouth,draggingmyteethalonghisskin.Myhandsare

broughtovermyheadandheldabovemewithoneofhis.Hiseyesburnintominewithsuchrawemotion

thatitripsthroughme,cripplingme.Iturnmyheadtobreakthecontact.

“Lookatme,”hegrunts,hishipsthrustinghardandfast,slammingagainstmineandpushingmeup

intotheheadboard.HisgriparoundmywristtightensandIarchoffthebed,pushingmychestagainsthis.

“Dylan,Ineedtoseeyou.”Iturnbacktohim,givinghimwhathewantsandlettingmyselffeelit.Heat

spreadsacrossmyskin,radiatingfromdeepwithinmeashisfreehandholdsthesideofmyface.“Don’t

pullawayfromme,”hepleads,butevenifhehadn’tsaidthewords,hiseyesaretellingmethesame

thing.Theyshoweveryemotion,everyunspokenthought.Iamcompletelylostinhisgreenstare,

completelylostinhim.Everythingabouthimholdsontome,keepingmerightwithhiminthismoment

andthereisn’tasinglepartofmethatwantstopullaway,thatwilleverwanttopullaway.Icandothis.

I’mstrongenoughforthis.

Mybodyisquicklyonthebrink,undeniablyresponsivetohisandIwanthimtherewithme.Ipull

mylipintomymouthandclencharoundhim,seeinghiseyeswidenandhaltinghisthrusts.

“Holyfuck.”HiseyesclampshutandIdoitagain,contractingmymusclesandfeelinghimreact

withajerk.“JesusChrist.Love,ifyoukeepdoingthat...”AndIdo.Idoitagain,thistimeholdingitand

hiseyesopenandlockontomine.

Iclencharoundhimoncemoreandhegruntsloudlybeforehestartstomove.Imoanandbringmy

hipsuptomeethischarges,givinghimdeeperentryandpullingalowgroanstraightoutofhim.

“Comewithme,love.”Hismouthcomesdownanddevoursmine,pullingmytongueintohisand

suckinghardanddeep.Icomefast,mybodyshakingandpulsing,myscreamsswallowedbyhismouthas

hegivesmehisrelease.Warmthrunsthroughme,clingingtome,tous.Ourbodiesfitperfectlytogether

andIpraythathe’llnevergettiredofme,ofthis.BecauseIneverwill.

Ourbreathingsteadiesashestaysontopofme,pressingmybodyintohismattress.He’sheavybut

notuncomfortableandIfindtheweighttobetheperfectamountofpressureagainstmybody.Myfingers

traillightlyalonghisbackashishotbreathburstsacrossmyneck.MytouchdeepensandIrubhishard

muscles,workinguptohisneckandfirmlydiggingin.Igiggleathistinymoansofpleasure.Helovesit

whenItouchhimandrightnow,that’swhatIwanttodo.Iwiggleunderneathhimandhisgorgeousface

turnsuptogazeatme.

“Letmeup.Iwanttogiveyouabirthdaymassage.”

Hequicklyandwithgreatenthusiasmpusheshimselfbackontohiskneesandallowsmetomove

aroundhim.Grabbingafewtissuesoffhisnightstand,I’mwipedcleanofhisreleaseandthetrashis

quicklydiscarded.Ashesettlesbackdownonhisstomach,Istraddlehiswaistandadmiretheview.He

hasthesexiestbackI’veeverseen.Broadandbuilt,butnotoverlymuscular.Ihatebigbulkyguysand

Reesehastheperfectmuscletoleannessratio.Aftergivingonequicksmacktohisperfectlysculptedass,

Ibeginrubbingupanddownhisback,gauginghisreactiontofindtheamountofpressurethathewants.A

fewsoftmoansindicatethatI’mpressinghimjusthowhelikesandImovetohisshouldersandstart

workinghim.

“TellmesomethingIdon’tknowaboutyou,”Isay,wantingtofindouteverylittledetailthatIcan.

ReeseseemsreallyopenaftersexandI’mgoingtousethattomyadvantage.

Hemoans.“Mmmm,Ihatecats.”Hismuffledanswermakesmebeltoutalaugh.

“Thatdoesnotevencount.Comeon,Carroll,youcandobetterthanthat.Itotallyhatecatstoo

though.They’resosmug.”Myhandsworkhisupperarms,pushingandpullinghismusclesuntilthey

loosen.Hisbreathingispeacefulandsteadyunderneathme.

“Idon’tknow,it’shardtothinkwhenyou’retouchingmelikethis.Whydon’tyoujustaskmea

question?”Heturnshisheadandrestsonhischeek,eyesclosed;hislonglashesbrushinghischeekbone.

Jesus,Iwouldkillforlasheslikethat.Whydoguysgetthebestlashes?“Dylan.”

“I’mthinking.”Ihavequestions,somanyquestions.ButamIbraveenoughtoaskthem?Ibitemy

lipanddecidetostartslow.“Doyouhookupwithalotofgirlsatweddings?”Thatisn’ttoobad.It’snot

likeIaskedhimhowmanygirlshe’ssleptwithwhichIwasverycuriousabout.Hiseyesopenfora

momentandthenheclosesthemagain.

“I’mnotsurewhatclassifiesalotbutyes,I’vehookedupwithwomenatweddingsbefore.”He

moansasIpressmythumbsdeeplyintohisupperback.“I’msureIwasn’tyourfirsteither.”

“Yesyouwere,”Iblurtout,seeinghiseyespopopenagain.Heblinksrapidlybeforeheflipsunder

me,holdingmestillsothatI’mnowstraddlinghisstomach.Hishandsrunupmythighsandplaywithmy

garterasIbeginrubbinghischest.“Well,youweremyfirstsluttyweddingsex.I’vehadafewdrunken

makeoutsessionsatweddingsbefore.”Ihaven’t,that’satotallie.I’veactuallyneverdoneanythingwith

astrangerataweddingbesidesdancewiththem.ButthewayReeseisstaringupatmerightnow,eyes

fullofwonder,Ifeeltheneedtonotsoundlikesuchanangelicvirginhoveringoverthisexperienced

player.Iclearmythroatandmassagedownhisarms,seeinghiseyescloseagainandgivingmethe

opportunitytostarewhileheisn’twatchingme.“Haveyoucalledothergirlslove?”

Asmallsmileformsonhislipsashiseyesremainclosed.“No,justyou.”

Ifeelmyheartswell.Hmm,Ilikethat.“Weretherealotofgirlsbeforeme?”Ispeakwithout

thoughtandclampmyeyesshut,bracingmyselfforhisanswer.Thesameimagerunsthroughmymindof

thehundredsofgirlsinhisofficeandIprayforalownumber.Areallylownumber.

“Dylan,doyoureallywanttogothere?Can’tyoujustaskmewhatmyfavoritemovieisorsome

shit?”

Islowlyopenmyeyesandseehimstaringatme,greeneyesblazing.Jesus,wasitthatbigofa

numberthathedidn’twanttotellme?IthinkIhavetherighttoknow.“Youknowmynumber,it’sonly

fair.Justtellmeifit’sinthetripledigitsornot.”MyhandsrestonhisabdomenandIgetashocked

expression.

“JesusChrist.Tripledigits?”Hescrubsdownhisfacewithbothhands.“Idon’tknow,closeto

twentyprobably.Doesitreallyfuckingmatter?”HishandsreturntomythighsandIglareathim.

“Yes,itreallyfuckingmatters,otherwiseIwouldn’thaveasked.”Slidingoffhisbody,Ikneelnext

tohimonthebedandgrabapillowtocovermyselfwith.Hequicklytakesitaway.“Givemethat.”

“No.It’smybirthdayandIwanttolookatyou.”Hetucksthepillowbehindhishead.“Now,tellme

whyitmatters?”Ishakemyheadandgetoffthebed,walkingtowardsthedoorway.“Whereareyou

going?”

“Togetsomecake.It’snotlikeIcanleaveoranything.YoudestroyedmydressandIdon’thavea

car,”IcalloutbehindmeasIwalkdownthehallway.Mymindisracing.Closetotwenty?I’vebeen

withoneguybesideshim.One.Iwalkaroundthecouchandpickuphisdressshirt,slippingitonand

lettingithangopensinceallthebuttonshadbeenrippedoff.Ibringthecollararoundmyfaceandinhale

deeply.Ohman.Pleaseletmekeepthis.Islicetwopiecesofcakeandplacethemonplates,grabbing

someforksandheadingbackdownthehallway.Reeseisnowsittingup,hisbackagainsttheheadboard

andthecoverspulleduparoundhiswaist

“Wow.”Istopattheendofthebedandstareathimafterhespeaks,hiseyesfixatedonmyattire.

“Youlookbeautifulinmyshirt.Keepit.”

Ismileandclimbuponthebed,handinghimhisplate.“Here,happybirthday,handsome.”Ileanin

andgivehimaquickkisswithhiscake,lingeringforafewsecondsashemoansagainstmylips.

Hesmilesatmeandtakesit,grabbingahugebitewithhisfork.“Mmmm,thisisreallygood.”

Watchinghisperfectmouthworkthebite,Iseehisadam’sapplemoveasitslidesdownhisthroat.“You

canmakethisformeeveryyear.”

MyforkhoversintheairasI’mabouttotakeabitemyself.HiseyesfixonmineandIquicklylook

downandpullthebitein.Everyyear?Imoansoftlyaroundmybiteandrelishinthedeliciousbanana

flavor.Thiscakeistooeasytotastethisgood.Iwatchinamusementashedevourshiscakequickly,

leaningoverandplacinghisemptyplateonthenightstand.Themuffledsoundofaringtoneringsthrough

thebedroom.

“Shit,”hesaysashehangsoverthesideofthebedandpullshisphoneoutofhispants.Heshakes

hisheadquicklybeforeheanswersit,exhalingandleaningbackagainsttheheadboard.

“Hi,Mom.Thanks.YeahI’mgood,howareyou?How’sDad?”

Nowusually,Iwouldjustsitbackandenjoymydessertandnotthinkofanythingdevioustodoin

thissituation.However,thememoryofReesestealingmycellphoneandgivingmymotherunwarranted

informationcreepsintomymind,alongwithabrilliantidea.Isitupandleanacrosshim,feelinghiseyes

onmeasIplacemyplateonthenightstandnexttohis.

“Ohyeah?Thatsoundslikehim.When’shetradingitin?”Grabbingthesheetswithbothhands,I

yankthemdownandquicklycrawlbetweenhislegs,mymouthenvelopinghispartiallyerectcockand

feelingitcometolifeimmediately.“Shit.Uh,nothing.”Ismilearoundhimandgripthebase,holdinghim

tightlyasIlickuphislength.Histhighsclenchandhisfreehandfiststhesheets.“MomcanIcallyou

back?”Ipullhimintomymouthandslideupanddownhislength,hearingsmallthroatygruntsfromabove

me.“NoI’mjustinthemiddleofsomething.Ohfuck.”Myhandglidesalongthewetnessandmeetsmy

mouth.HepulsesagainstmeasIsuckhimhard,thenharder.“I’llcallyouback.”Thephoneischucked

offthebedquicklyandhishandsgripmyhair.

“Godyes.Justlikethat.”

Igroanagainsthim,myfreehandreachingunderandholdinghissac.“Tellmehowgooditfeels,”I

sayasIlickthetip.Myhandpumpshim,longevenstrokesasIglanceupathisexpression.Eyesdarkand

powerful,browcreasedandjawclenched.

“Sofuckinggood.Yourmouthisincredible.”HejerksandIsliphimbackintomymouth.Hishands

gripmyhead,pullingmeupanddownattherhythmhewants,andIlethim.Itishisbirthdayafterall.His

hipsthrustupandhefucksmymouthasItamemygagreflex.He’ssodeepinme,hittingthebackofmy

throatandmakingmyeyeswater.Hissoftpraiseskeepmegoingeventhoughmyjawisbeginningtoache.

“Dylan,sogood,ohGod,Iloveyourmouth.”Ifeelapulseandknowhe’sclose.Increasingthepressure,

IsuckashardasIcanandcuphisballs,feelingthemtighteninmyhand.Hegroansloudlyandtwitches.I

squeezeeverylastdropoutofhimandswallow,savoringhistaste.MyeyesflickupasIlickhimandsee

himwatchingme,alwayswatchingme.I’vemissedthelookonhisfaceathisreleasebutthelookhe’s

givingmerightnowmakesupforthatloss.He’sincompletewonderment.Hebringshishandsupand

runsboththroughhishair.

“Damn,thatwasunreal.Comeuphere.”

IwipemylipswiththebackofmyhandandmoveuphisbodyuntilIamstraddlinghiswaist.“Do

youlikeitwhenIdothat?”MyhandsrestonhisarmsandIsqueezethemgently.

Hislaughwarmsmyface.“Areyoukidding?DidInotjustcomeinthisprettylittlemouth?”His

fingerrunsalongmybottomlipandIkissitlightly.“Doyoulikedoingit?”

Inodquicklyandwebothlaugh.“Iloveit.Iusedtohateitbutwithyou,Iloveit.”Hesmiles

sweetlyandrunshishandsdownmyarms.“Haveyoualwayslikedeatingpussy?”

Myquestioncauseshimtostumblebackabitandheshakeshisheadatme,givingmeastrange

look.“Uh,I’llalwayslikeeatingyourpussy.Let’sleaveitatthat.”Henarrowshiseyesatme,seeingmy

unsatisfiedexpression.“Dylan,really?”

“What?I’mjustcurious.Whydoyoulikeminesomuch?”Iglanceupathimfromundermylashes

andseehiseyestraildowntothetopicofdiscussion.“Don’tallwomentastethesame?”

Helickshislipsandsmiles,causingmetobitetheinsideofmycheektoholdinmygrin.Ihaveno

ideawhyI’msocuriousaboutthis,butIam.Hiseyesmeetmineandheshakeshishead.Hetrailshis

fingerdownmystomachanddipsintome.“YoursisthesweetestpussyandtheonlyoneIwant.I’mabit

obsessedwithit.”Imoansoftlyashemovesaroundbeforeslippingoutofme.

“Good,”Istateashepopshisfingerintohismouthandsmilesaroundit.GoodLord,that’shot.He

engulfsmyfaceinhishandsandmovesinslowly;plantingthesweetest,mostgentlekisshe’severgiven

me.Pullingbackeversoslightly,westudyeachother.Therearenowords,justthesoundofourbreathing

asmyeyesexamineeveryinchofhisface.Helookscompletelyrelaxedrightnow.Nofurrowedbrow,no

tensioninhisjaw.Justslightlypartedlipsandsoftgreeneyes.Myfingerrunsdowntheprominentslitin

hisbottomliptohischin,feelingsoftstubblealonghisjaw.Isigh.ThesightofReesewithafiveo’clock

shadowwouldsurelycrippleme.Trailinghisfingersalongmyskin,hebrushesovermyeyebrows,down

mytemplesandacrossmycheekbones.

“Whatareyouthinkingrightnow?”hewhispersandIleanin,pressingourforeheadstogetherand

closingmyeyes.God,whatwasn’tIthinkingrightnow.ThatIlovebeingwithhimlikethisinhisbed,

thatIamsowrappedupinhimandatcertainmoments,Ithinkitmightbreakme.ThatI’mscared,

terrifiedofmyfeelingsforhimandhispossiblelackoffeelingsformeinthesameway.Ineedtogive

himananswersoIdo.

Iopenmyeyesandconnectwithhis.“ThatI’mscaredI’mgoingtofuckthisup,”Ireply,sosoft,so

lowthatIthinkmaybehemissesit,untilhiseyeswiden.Iswallowandcontinue.“Idon’treallyknow

whatI’mdoing.Imean,I’veneverdonethisbefore.”Hishandbrushesmyhairback.“Youmakethislook

soeasyandIjust,IfeellikeI’mstruggling.”Myvoicebreaksattheend.Isoundweak.Patheticeven.His

silenceeatsawayatmesoIshiftdownabittolaymyheadagainsthischestinmyfavoritespot,nuzzling

hisneck.Ineedhisscentrightnow.IamanythingbutrelaxedafterthatadmissionandIknowitwill

sootheme.

“Ithinkyou’reamazing,”hepronouncesintomyhair,hishandswrappingaroundmywaistand

holdingmybodyagainsthis.Amazing?Atthis?Really?Iexhaleslowlyandfeelallthetensionleavemy

body.ThatisallIneededtohear.IfhethinksI’mamazingatthis,thanImustbedoingsomethingright.

Closingmyeyes,Iconcentrateonhisbreathingandlethissmellwashoverme.Hishandsdipunderhis

dressshirtandstrokemybacklovingly,justlikehedidlastweekonhiscouchafterourlongtalk.And

onceagain,thereissilencebetweenus.Butthiskindofsilence,thekindwherenowordsarewelcomed

becausejustbeingtogether,holdingeachotherisbetterthananythingthatcouldpossiblybesaid.This

kindofsilenceisperfect.AndthenIpassoutfrommyfavoriteformofintoxication.ReeseCarroll.

Fifteen

I’vealwayssleptsoundlyinmybed,wrappedupinmyninehundredthreadcountsheetsanddown

comforter.MyfeathertopmattressgavetheillusionofsleepingonacloudandonceIlaydownonit,I

wasoutforthecount.Deadtotheworld.Icouldusuallysleepthroughanythingexceptmydaily5:00a.m.

alarm.Ioncesleptthroughthecommotionoftwofireenginesandseveralambulanceswhenabuilding

acrossthestreetcaughtonfire.Ihadnoidea.WhenIeventuallywokeupmid-morningonthatSaturday,I

wasshockedathowloudthesirenswerethatIhadsleptthrough.SomostmorningsevenwhenIdidhave

towakeupat5:00a.m,Ifeltextremelywellrestedandreadyfortheday.Agoodnight’ssleepisvery

importantforyourbodytoproperlyfunctionandIusuallyachievedonenightly.Butthismorning,asI

slowlyshiftmyheadfromsidetoside,eyesstillclosedandthefeelofsomethingheavyontopofme,I

feellikeI’vebeensleepingfordays.I’veneverfeltthisrevitalized.Slowlyflutteringmyeyesopen,I

spotawildmessofdarkbrownhairspreadacrossmychest.Hotbreathblowsacrossmybreast,tickling

mynipple,andittakesmeaminuteforprocesswhat’sinfrontofme,orreally,what’sontopofme.My

eyesshootopenandIturntothealarmonthetablenexttome.7:12a.m.itflashes.7:12a.m.?Fuck!

“Reese.Getup.”Iwiggleunderneathhimbuthe’snotbudging.He’snotevenshiftinghisweightat

all.He’sclingingtomelikesaranwrap,hisheadnuzzlingbetweenmybreastsandourlegstangling

togetherinthesheets.Ialmostdon’twanttomovebecausebeingunderandwrappedupinhimthisway

feelsamazing.Butitsmorning,andIfuckingsleptover.“REESE.”Grippinghisshouldersandsnapping

backintomysanity,IpushwitheverythingIhaveandhegrumbles,rollingoverontohisbackandslowly

openingoneeye.Thatoneeyescansmybodyandhesmiles.

“Morning,love.”Whoa.I’mmomentarilystunnedbyhisdeepgroggybedroomvoice.Lowand

throaty,itsendsachillthroughme.Iglancedownquickly,notingthatI’mstillwearinghisdressshirtthat

iscompletelyopenandmygarterandstockings.Dartinghisarmout,hepullsmeclosetohisbodyand

wrapsaroundmeagain.

“Youlookwildlysexyrightnow,inmyshirtandinmybed.”Hishandrunsdownmystomachand

brushesbetweenmylegs.Iinvoluntarilymoan,knowingfullwellthatIdonothavetimeforthis.Butmy

bodybelongstothismanandIcan’thelphowitreacts.“You’resowet.Wereyoudreamingaboutme

doingthis?”Onefingerdipsin,thentwo,andIthrowmyheadbackandarchmybodyoffthebed.

“Ohyesrightthere.”Myheadfallstothesideandmyeyesmeettheclockagainashisfingersmove

inperfectrhythm.It’safter7:00a.m.Thebakeryopenedat7:00a.m.“Fuck.I’msolate.”Ibathishand

awayandtryandsitupwhenheslamsmebackdown,movingontopofmeandpressingmeintothe

mattress.“Reese,seriously.Idon’thavetimeforthis.Joeyisprobablyfreakingoutrightnow.”Herolls

hishipsagainstmypelvisandImoanatthesensation.Bakery?Whatbakery?WhothefuckisJoey?

Hekissesmehard,dartinghistongueintomymouthandItastetoothpaste.Toothpaste?Ishakehim

offme.“Hey,whydoyoutastelikeyou’vebrushedyourteeth?Haveyoubeenupalready?”Ifhesaysno,

thenthemanevenhasperfectmorningbreathwhichwouldnotsurpriseme.Myeyeswidenashissmell

hitsme.It’shisusualdecadentscentbutit’sstronger.Fresher.HiswickedgrinbeamsdownatmeandI

gritmyteethandgrunt.“Reese,didyoualreadytakeashowerthismorning?”

“You’renottheonlyonethatgetsupatfiveandworksout.AndJoeyisnotfreakingout.”Heplants

aquickkissonmylips.“Icalledhimandexplainedthesituation.”Anotherhiprollcatchesmybreath.

Focus,Dylan.It’sjustapenis.Thebestpenisbutstill,justapenis.

Iglareupathisgiantgrin.“Areyoutellingmethatyougotupatfiveanddidn’twakeme?Doyou

notrealizethatIhaveabusinesstorun?Andwhattimedoyouhavetogotoworkorareyouthat

importantthatyoucomeandgoasyouplease?”Igroanasherollsagain.“Andstopdoingthat.”Myhands

franticallypushagainsthisbodytoremovehimoffmebutnothinghappens.Shocker.Heleansoffabit

andgrabsmyarms,bracingthemoneithersideofmyhead.Droppinghishead,herestshisforehead

againstmine.

“Sofeisty.YoumakemewanttokeepyouherealldayjusttoseehowmadIcanmakeyou.”Iopen

mymouthtoprotestandhistongueslipsin,capturingmineandslowlysuckingonit.OhLord,helpme.I

havenowillpowerwhenitcomestohim.Hereleasesmealltoosoon.“ButIwon’tbecauseIdohaveto

makeitintoworksometimetoday.Andjustfortherecord,Ididtrytowakeyouuptogoforarunwithme

butyouwereinacoma.”Igruntloudlyandmakeafaceathim.ThatIcandefinitelybelieve.Iwiggle

underneathhimandhearcheshisbrow,movinghishipsuptorubhislengthagainstmyclit.

“OhGod,”Iwhimper,clampingmyeyesshut.

“Now,youhavethreeoptionshere.YougettopickhowImakeyoucomebeforeItakeyouto

work.”HewiggleshisbrowsatmeandIgiggle.PlayfulReeseisimpossibletosaynoto.

“Idon’thavetimeforthis,”Ipleadweakly.HiseyesnarrowatmeandIissuehimasmirk.

“Whoareyoutryingtofoolhere,Dylan?”HipswivelandIgroan.“Icouldmakeyoucomeintwo

minutesifIhadto.”Yeahright.He’sgoodbutnotthatgood.“Hands,mouth,orme.”

Holyhell.

I’mtryingdesperatelynottoallowmysmiletocrackmyfaceinhalfbutI’mfailing

miserablyandhardlycaring.Ijerkmyhipsupagainsthimandseehiseyeswiden.“You.”Helickshis

lipsandreleasesmyarms,reachingdownandwrappingmylegsaroundhiswaist.Heentersmeina

quickthrustandIcryout,myheadrollingbackandmyarmsreachingabovemetograsptheheadboard.

“Yes,ohyes.”MyhandsgripthepostsandIpushdownwithmyarms,meetinghismovementsandforcing

himdeeperinsideme.“Reese.”

Grippingmythighs,hebringsmylegstohisfrontandreststhemonhisshouldersashepummels

intome.Hisgroansareloudandthroaty.“Feelit,love.FeelwhatonlyIcandotoyou.”Hearchesback

andholdsmylegsashedrivesintome.“Nobodywillmakeyoufeelthisgood,Dylan,justme.”Myeyes

aregluedtohisandIcan’tlookaway.Iwanttotellhimthathe’sright,thatIknownootherguywillever

makemefeellikethisandIneverwanttogiveonethechance.ButIdon’t.Instead,Ijustfeelhim.Every

stroke,everypush,Ifeelandtakeeverythinghegivesme.

Deeper,deeper,harderandhe’srelentless.I’mclose,soclosethatIcan’tbelieveIactually

doubtedwhathedoestome.Clearlymyinsanelygoodnight’ssleephasrenderedmestupid.Hishand

trailsdownmylegashethrustsandhisthumbfindsmyspot.Withtheslightesttwitch,I’mdone.

“I’mcoming.Ohfuck.”Iclosemyeyesandscreamsoloudmyvoicebreaks.Ihearhisloudcryand

flickthembackopentoseehimgluedtome.Greenandpiercing,hecapturesmeandIwatchhimfall

apart.Hepullshisbottomlipintohismouthandbitesdownashepumpsintome,givingmehisrelease.

Turninghishead,hepresseshismouthtomylegandpants,hisjaggedbreathburstingacrossmyshin.He

stillsinsidemeasweslowlycomedowntogether.

“JesusChrist.”Ifeelandseehislipscurluparoundmyskin.Mylegsaredroppedfromhis

shouldersandhemovesoffthebed,liftingmeupintohisarms.Hecarriesmedownthehallwayand

straightintothebathroom.I’mplacedonmyfeetinfrontofthevanityandglanceatmyselfinthemirror.

“Ohshit.”MyhairlooksrightlyfuckedbutnotintheunbelievableReesehairsortofway,mylipsare

swollen,cheeksflushed,andmybreastsarebeautifullytaintedwithhismarks.Myfingersfrantically

combthroughmyhairashesmilesbehindme.“Ineedsomethingtowearoutofhere.Anysuggestions,or

wouldyoulikemetojustwearwhatIhaveon?”Iarchmybrowandcrackasmileashisfades.Oh,Mr.

Possessiveisback.

Hishandscomeupandrakethroughmyhair,messingupwhatI’vejusttamed.“You’rehilarious.

Wouldyouliketotakeashowerwithme?”heasksashewalksoverandturnsiton.Hisbathroomisfar

nicerthanmine,massiveevenwithashowerthatcouldprobablyfittenpeople.NinewomenandReese

possibly?Ugh.Don’tgothere.Ishakethethoughtoutofmyhead.

“Yes,butithastobequick.Nofunnybusiness.”Ibendandbeginunhookingmygarter,slidingmy

stockingsoffmylegs.HedisappearsafterIcatchhimwatchingmeafterseverallongseconds.Always

watching.HereappearsmomentslaterasIslipintotheshower,apileofclothesinhishands.“Youdon’t

haveconditioner?”Iaskasthewarmwatercascadesdownmybody.Theonlythinginhisshoweris

shampooandhisbodywashwhichIgrabquicklyandtakeasniffof.Iclosemyeyesandletthecitrus

scentrunthroughme,openingthemtofindReesestandingintheshowerwithmeandsmiling.

“Youusethatandyou’llsmelllikeme.”Hesmiles,pullingitoutofmyhandsandsquirtingsome

intohispalm.“IthinkyoulikehowIsmell.”

“Ilovehowyousmell,”Ireplyashishandsworkintoarichlatherandhebeginsrubbingthemover

mybody.“AndnowIwon’tevenhavetoseeyouagaintodaytogetmyReesefix.”HelaughssoftlyandI

watchhisconcentrationashewashesme,startingatmyneckandmovingdowneacharm.Hecovers

everyinchofskininsudsandIgiggleashishandsworkmybreasts,meticulouslywashingthemfor

severalminutes.“Ithinkthey’reclean.”

“I’llbethejudgeofthat.”Hishandsmovedownmystomachandaroundmywaist,droppingtomy

assandworkingthelatherthereasIsquirmagainsthim.“So,sinceyou’vesurvivedasleepoverwithme,

thatmeanswecanhavethemallthetimenowright?”heasksplayfully,hiseyestwinklingwithmischief.

“Absolutelynot.Ineverintendedonsleepingover,infact,Ithinkyouletmefallasleeponyouon

purposeandtrickedmeintoit.”Hekneelsinfrontofmeandwashesbetweenmylegs,lingeringwitha

grinbeforehemovesdown.Hemassagesmythighsandmyshins,bringingeachfootupandwashingthem

thoroughlyasIgriptheshowerwall.I’mterriblyticklishandheknowsit.Ithinkaboutwhathejustasked

me.Sleepoversallthetime?There’snowayIcandothesleepoverthingagain,letaloneallthetime.

EventhoughIdidgetthebestsleepofmylifeandthesightofhimwrappedaroundmethismorningisa

memoryI’dliketoholdontoforever.“Thatwasaspecialbirthdaytreat.”Iholdontohisheadtokeepmy

balance.

Hestandsandgrabshisshampoo,squeezingsomeintomyhandanddoingthesametohis.

“Honestly,Ihadeveryintentionoftakingyouhomelastnight.ButIthinkwemusthavefallenasleepatthe

sametime.ThelastthingIrememberbeforepassingoutisyoulyingonmychest.”Webeginwashingeach

other’shairtogether,myeyesclosingasIenjoythescalpmassage.Hereallyisgoodatthis.“Andthen

whenIwokeupatfiveandcouldn’tgetyouawakewithoutafoghorn,IcalledJoeyandtoldhimthatyou

accidentlyfellasleepandthatyou’dbealittlelatetoday.Hedidn’tseemsurprised.”Ourhandsdropand

Ibackupintothewater,rinsingmyhairandsmilingatthescentthatisnowgoingtobeonmeallday.I’ve

honestlyneversmeltanythingbetter,andIliveinafuckingbakery.

“Doyoualwayswantyourflingstospendthenight?”Imoveoutofthewaterandswitchspotswith

him,allowinghimtorinsehisshampooout.Igrabhisbodywashandsquirtsomeintomypalm.Shit.Did

Ireallywanttoknowtheanswertothat?No,Idon’t.“Nevermind.Idon’twanttoknowthat.”Myhands

begintowashhisbodyashiseyesstudyme.“Itdoesn’tmatter.Ijustdon’tthinkweshouldmakeahabit

outofit.”HemoanssoftlyasImoveoverhisshoulderswithpressure,downhisarms,hischest,andhis

stomach.Igetniceandclosetoreacharoundandwashhisback,inhalinghimdeeplywhileIdoit.

Ikneeldownandwashhislegs,hiserectionstaringmerightintheface.“Dylan,we’recasualand

everything,butIthinkyou’remorethanaflingatthispoint.Idon’tusuallyfuckmyflingsrepeatedly.”I

standandlookupintohiseyesasherinsesthesoapoffhimself.Hisjawistightandhisbrowsare

furrowed.“Okay?”

Iswallowandnodslowly.Okay.SoI’mabovehisflingstatusbutstillcasual,nowherenearthe

girlfriendzone.AndaccordingtoBilly,hedoesn’tdogirlfriendssowithReesethereisn’tagirlfriend

zone.Iguesshedoescareaboutmemorethanhisotherhookups.

“I’mallclean,feellikegettingalittledirty?”Iaskandhiseyeswideninstantly.Hereachesforme

justasIslipquicklyoutoftheshower.“Sorry.Notimeforthatthismorning.”Iwrapatowelaround

myselfandquicklygrabtheclothesthatheplacedonthesink,makingabreakforittowardshisbedroom.

IhearhislaughsbehindmeasIdroptheclothesonthebedandexaminewhathe’spickedoutforme.

Sweatpants,aT-shirt,andapairofhisboxers.Wait,wherearemypanties?Iglancearoundtheroom,

lookingallaroundthebedwhenReesewalksinwithatowelwrappedaroundhiswaist.Ilookupathim

andmyeyeswiden.SweetLord.I’veseenthemannakedseveraltimesalready,butthesightofhiminjust

atowelmakesmeclenchmythighsshut.

“Likewhatyousee?”heasks,winkingatmeashewalksintohisclosest,momentarilystunningme.

Idroptomykneesandglanceunderthebed.“Panties?”

He’snotlongandreemergeswithadressshirt,khakis,andtie,shruggingatmeandbarelyholding

inhissmile.

Istandandgripmytowel.“Youhavethemdon’tyou?Whatareyoustartingsomeweirdcollection

ofmylingerie?”

Hedropshistowelandbeginsdressing,causingmetolookawayquicklybeforeIjumponhim.“I

havenoideawhatyou’retalkingabout,butIbelieveIprovidedyouwithsomeboxerstoputyoursexy

assintosoI’mnotsurewhattheproblemis.”HeslipsonhisboxersandpullshiswhiteT-shirtoverhis

head.

“Humph,pervert,”IreplyandhissmilespreadsacrosshisfaceasIdropmytowel.Ifeelhiseyes

onmeasIstepintohisboxers,rollingthemasIdidbeforetomakethemfitmebetter.Next,Igetintoa

pairofsweatpantshe’slaidoutformethatIalsohavetorollseveraltimesatthewaist.Slippingonmy

bra,IpulltheT-shirthe’sgivenmeovermyhead.It’sanoldUniversityofChicagoshirtandhas

apparentlybeenwornrepeatedly.Didhegivemeoneofhisfavoriteshirts?Iglanceathimashestands

infrontofthemirrorhangingonhiswall,puttingonhistie.Helooksdevastatinglyhandsomeandohso

yummyinthemorning,freshlyfuckedandshowered.HeeyesmequicklyandIsmilebeforeIwalkoutof

thebedroom,needingtoleavehispresencebeforeIriphisclothesoff.Grabbingmypurseoffthedining

roomtable,IslipintomyheelsandshakemyheadathowridiculousIlookinthemwithmysweats.

“Ready?”HewalksdownthehallwaytowardsmeandstopswhenIturntohim.Iletoutaheavy

sighathisappearanceashiseyesfallontomyfeet.“Youlookbeautiful,”hestatesasifit’sobviousandI

runathim,meetinghiminthehallwayandwrappingmylegsaroundhiswaist.“Whoa.Hi,love.”

“Youlookbeautiful.Ilookrightlysilly.Nowcomeon,I’mlateenoughasitisandyou’remakingme

wanttothrowyoubackintoyourbed.”HeturnsmearoundandstartsbacktowardshisbedroomasI

giggleintohisneck.“No.Wecan’t.”

Hegruntsinprotestashecarriesmetowardsthedoorandwefinallyleavewithmestillinhis

arms.

**

Afterstoppingtogetacouplecoffees,wedrivedownFayetteStreetandpullupinfrontofthe

bakery.IglanceoutthewindowandseeJoeystandingbehindthecounter.“Didyouhaveagood

birthday?”IaskasIunbucklemyseatbeltandturntoseehiseyesonme.

Hesmilessweetlyandreachesout,pullingmyhandintohisandliftingittohislipsforaquickkiss.

“Ihadthebestbirthday.”Ohmy.HedropsmyhandandIleanin,pressingmylipsagainsthisand

lingeringthereforamoment.Isuddenlydon’twanttogetoutofhiscar.Notafterlastnight,notafterthis

morning,anddefinitelynotafterwhathe’sjustadmitted.He’smintyanddelicious,hesmellsheavenly,

andhe’sdressedwaytoogoodrightnow.

Ileanbackabitandhiseyesopen.“Makeoutwithme,”Isayinmybestflirtatiousvoice.

Helickshislips.“Isn’tthatwhatwewerejustdoing?”

Ishakemyhead,wrappinghistieupinmyhand.“No,thatwasagoodbyekiss.Iwantyouto

devourme.”

Hishandsreacharoundmeandhepullsmetowardshim,slidingmesidewaysintohislap.“You

mean,likethis?”heasksandbringshismouthfirmlytomine.Histonguetwistsinmymouth,movingwith

mine,stroking,licking,andtastingeveryinchofme.I’mpantingsoheavilythatI’mcertainthewindows

willstartfoggingupanysecond.

“Ifuckinglovekissingyou,”IsayasImanagetobreakawaybrieflyandkissdownhisnecktohis

collar,relishinginhisscent.

“See,wecoulddothiseverymorningifyou’dsleepovermore.”

Imovebackupandlatchbackontohismouth,silencinghisridiculousness.Themaniscrazy.After

severallongtotallyworthitminutesofsuckingface,Isomehowmanagetopullawayandlickhistasteoff

mylips.“Haveagreatday,handsome.”Iopenthedoorandhopout,turningbackafternearlystumbling

fromthemake-outsession.

“Youtoo,love,”hereplies.Iglancedownandnoticehiserection,reachinginquicklyandrubbing

againstit.Hishandclampsdownonmineandhemoans,pullinghisbottomlipintohismouthandshaking

hisheadatme.“Go,beforeIthrowyoubackinhereandtakeyoutoworkwithmetofinishwhatyou’ve

started.”IshriekandhearhislaughasIshutthedoorandwave.I’mfloating,completelyhighoffhimasI

makemywayintotheshop,readytostartmyworkday.

Sixteen

“Morning,”IsingasIwalkintotheshopandgetamassivesmilefromJoey.Iquicklyrushupstairs

andchangeintomoreappropriateworkattire,smilingasIfoldupReese’sclothesandstickthemintomy

dresser.Iwilldefinitelybewearingtheseagain,andoften.Isliponjeansandablueblouseandpair

themwithmyfavoritepairofstrappyblacksandals.Afterthrowingmystilldamphairupintoamessy

bunandapplyingsomemakeup,IreemergeintothebakeryandseeJoeytappingafamiliarwhiteboxon

thecounter.

“Youhavesomuchtotellmeaboutafteryouopenthis,”hesayswithagrin.Ithinkhelooks

forwardtomydeliveriesfromReeseasmuchasIdo.

“Didthatjustgethere?”MyeyesrakeovertheboxasIpullitclosetome.Howinthehelldidhe

havetimetosendthistomealready?He’sprobablyjustnowsettlinginathisoffice.

“Actually,itwaswaitingoutfrontthismorning.Iguesshewantedyoutohaveitassoonasyougot

here.”Hesighs.“Sofuckingromantic.Goddamnit,Billy.”

“OhleavepoorBillyalone,notallmencanbeasperfectasReeseCarroll.”Jesus,didIjustsay

thatoutloud?WasReeseperfect?IthinksilentlyforamomentasIstareoffintospaceanddecidethat

yes,heisperfect.CatchingJoey’shurrythefuckupstare,Iexcitedlypullthewhiteribbonandopenthe

box,myeyeswideningasIhoveroveritandglanceatthecontents.“Holyfuck.”Ipulloutseveral

picturesofanorgasmicReese.Literally,Iknowthisface,thefacehemakeswhenheclimaxes.“Ohmy

God.”Iriflethroughtheboxandseepicturesofhimfromthewaistup,someoneobviouslyhavingtaken

themastheywereridinghimuntilhecame,waitingforthatexactmomenttocaptureit.

“JesusChrist.Ishe,isthat,hesentyouthese?”Joeysquealsandgrabsafewofthepictures.Iallow

itonlybecausethere’snonecontaininganythingfromthewaistdown.Ican’tbelievethis.There’satleast

adozeninhere.Hesentmepicturesofhimfuckingsomeoneelse?Ortobemorespecific,someone

elsefuckinghim?MyheartdropsasIstareathisface.He’slookingatthecamera,lookingintotheeyes

ofthepersontakingthepictureasshebringshimtoorgasm.Hisjawisclenched,creaseinhisbrow,

piercinggreeneyes.I’mgoingtobesick.“FUCK.”IsnatchthepicturesoutofJoey’shandandshove

themallbackintothebox.“Ican’tbelievehim.Whythefuckwouldhesendmethese?WHATTHE

FUCK,JOEY?”Myscreamcauseshimtostumblebackandheholdsuphishands.

“Christ,Idon’tknow.Imean,thesearepicturesofhimhavingsexwithsomeoneright?”

“Yes.Didyounotseehisface?”Myeyesfillwithtearsandhisfacesoftens.“Whywouldhesend

methese?”Idroptothefloor.“OhGod.”MyhandscovermyfaceandIsobasJoeymovesaroundme.

I’mexpectinghimtodroptothefloorwithmebuthedoesn’t.Andhisvoicetellsmewhy.

“Yeah,ReeseCarrollplease,”hesaysandIglanceuptoseehimholdingtheshopphonetohisear.

Ohfuck.“Idon’tgiveaflyingfuckifhe’sinafuckingmeeting.Puthisassonthephonenow.”

“Joey.”IstandandtrytograbthephoneoutofhishandwhichIrealizeisuseless.We’vebeen

downthisroad.HiseyeswidenandIseehisjawtwitch.

“Youstupidfuckingprick.Whatthefuckiswrongwithyou?”

Ican’tmoveandmytearsarestillfallingdownmyface.IshouldstopJoey.Icanhandlemyown

battles.Butrightnow,Ican’tformasinglethoughtinmyhead.

“Don’tplaydumb,Reese.Dylangotyourfuckingdelivery,youfuckingasshole.”Istareatthebox

that’spracticallyscreamingatmeonmycounterandgrabit,droppingitintothetrashcan.Ifeeldirtyall

ofasuddenandhaveastrongurgetogojumpinabathofhandsanitizer.“Whatdelivery?Youfucking

knowwhat.Whythefuckwouldshewanttoseesomethinglikethat?Fuckyou.Don’tfuckingcomenear

heragain.”Heslamsthephonedown,hisbreathingerraticasheturnstomeandpullsmeintohisarms.I

cryagainsthimintohischest,lettinggoandconvulsinginviolentshakes.Myphonebeginstoringinmy

pocketbutIignoreit.Iknowexactlywhoitis.“Jesus,I’msosorry.”Theshopdoorswingsopenandwe

bothturntoseeMrs.Freywalkin.IquicklypushawayfromJoeyandwipeawaymytears.

“Mrs.Frey.Hi,howareyou?”Iaskashereyessearchmyface.

“Dylan?Ohsweetieareyouallright?Isthisabadtime?”ShemovestowardsthecounterandI

franticallyshakemyhead.

“No,nonotall.Umm,boydrama.”ShenodsinappreciationandsmilesatmeasIforceafriendly

expression.“Letmegrabyourcake.”Iwalkinthebackandpullhercakeoutofthefridge,placingiton

theworktoptogiveitafinalonceover.MyphoneringsagaininmypocketandIonceagainignoreit.

Fuckhim.Iopenthecaketopandglanceatmycreation.Thechocolatepeppermintfrostingmesseswith

meandthetearscomeagain.“Pullyourshittogether.You’reatwork,”Isaytomyselfquietly.Ican’tlet

thisaffectmyjob.IwaswarnedaboutReese,multipletimesactually.Ishouldn’tbesurprised.It’smy

ownfuckingfaultforreactingthisway.Iquicklyclosethecakebox,plasteringonasmileasIwalkback

upfront.

“Hereyougo.Onedoublechocolatepeppermintcake.HappyAnniversary.”

Mrs.Freybeamsatme.“Oh,Dylan,itlookslovely.Youevenscrolledournamesonit.Blessyou,

dear.”SheleansinandgivesmeaquickhugbeforeshewavesatJoeyandturnstoleave.

Assoonastheshopdoorcloses,myfakeexpressiondropsandIcrumble.“Joey,Ineedaminute.”I

quicklyrunintotheback,upthestairs,andhurlmyselfintomybed.

I’mimmediatelyremindedofwakingupwithReeseasIwrapmyselfaroundmycomforterthat

doesn’tsmelllikehim.However,Ido.Ifuckingsmelllikehim.Iusedtolovethiscomforterbutright

now,Ihateit.Iusedtoloveeverythingaboutthisbedbutnotanymore.Notafterlastnight.Lastnightwas

obviouslysomesortofafuckingjoketohimsincehedecidedtoremindmeeversosweetlythismorning

ofallhisotherhookups.Whatwerehiswords?Closetotwentyprobably?Whatawhore.Myphone

beepsatextmessagealertinmypocketandIpullitoutandchuckitacrosstheroom,sendingitcrashing

againstmywall.IclosemyeyesandthinkbacktolastnightwhenIhearcommotioncomingfrombelow

me.Familiarcommotion.Shit.

“Reese!Donotfuckinggoupthere!”Joey’svoicescreechesandIpanic,flingingmyselfoutofmy

bedandrunningtowardsmybathroomasIseehisheadquicklyemergingupmystairs.

“Dylan!”heyellspanickybutImakeittothebathroomandslamthedoor,lockingitquickly.The

doorshakesashepoundsonit.“Dylan,whatthefuckisgoingon?”

Ibackawayfromthedoorandsitontheedgeofthetub.“Goaway,Reese.”Thetearsstingmy

cheeksastheystreamdownatafasterpace.Myeyesarelockedonthedoorasitshakesfuriously.“Go

thefuckaway!”IhunchoverandcovermyearsthebestIcan.WherethefuckisJoey?

“Dylan,whathappened?”Thebangingstops.“Pleasetalktome.Idon’tknowwhatdeliveryyougot

butIdidn’tsendyouanythingtoday.IfuckingsweartoGodIdidn’t.”Hedidn’tsendmeanything?Butit

wasinthesamebox.Thewhitebox.

Istand.“Youdidn’tsendmeanything?”Mybrokenvoicestingsmythroat.

“No,love,pleaseopenthedoor.Ineedtoseeyou.”Ihearthesoundofalightthudandpicture

Reesedroppinghisheadagainstthedoor.Mymindscrambles.Ifhedidn’tsendmeanything,thenwho

did?“Dylan?”Iquicklywipeundermyeyesandturnthelock,openingthedoorandlookingupathim.He

immediatelygrabsmeandpullsmeintohimandIdon’tprotest.IlethimholdmeuntilIrememberthe

pictureswhichonlytakemeafewseconds.

“Letgoofme!”Iyellandpushpasthim,feelinghishandsonmywaistandspinningmearound.

“Love.”

“No.Youmaynothavesentmethosepicturesbutsomeonesureashelldid.Ican’tfuckingbelieve

this.”TheimagesareburnedintomymindandI’mfuming.

“Whatpictures?Whatareyoutalkingabout?”Igotowalkdownstairs,hearingJoey’svoiceand

someoneelse’sbutReeseholdsontome.

“LetgoofmeandI’llfuckingshowyou.”

HedoesbutnotbeforeIhearhimmuttersomethingunderhisbreaththatsoundsanawfullotlike

drivesmecrazy.

ImarchintothebakeryandseeIanpinningaveryred-facedJoeyagainstthewall.“JesusChrist.

Lethimgo,Ian.”HedoesandJoeyshoveshimhardbeforeturningtowardsme.

“Areyouallright?”heasks,flickingaglaretowardsReesewhohasfollowedclosebehindme.

“Yes.No.Idon’tknow.”Ireachintothetrashandpulloutthebox,thrustingitintoReese’schest.

“SogladIgottoseethese.Reallymademyfuckingday.”IwalkovertoJoeyandmakesurehe’sokay.

Ianwalksuptousboth.“Sorry,man.Ijustneededtogivemyboyachancetotalktohisgirland

knewyouwouldn’tlethim.”

Joeysmoothsouthisshirt.“You’reluckyyou’remarryingoneofmybestfriends,otherwiseIwould

havehurledyouthroughthatwindow.Asshole.”

“Fuck,”Reesesaysandweallturntohimandseehimfishingthroughthebox.“Thatfuckingbitch.

Dylan,I’msosorryyousawthese.”HemovesclosertomeandIstepback,puttingmyhanduptostop

him.

“Whosentthem?”Iasksternly.HiseyesflicktoIanandImoveincloser.“Reese,whothefucksent

thesetome?”

Heswallowsloudly.“ThegirlIwaslast…”

“Fucking?”Joeyfillsin.

Reesenods.

“Classy,”Joeyadds.

Ian’seyeswiden.“Shit,man.IknewshewaspissedthatyoufiredherbutIguessshewaswaypast

pissed.Andclearlyunstable.Fuck.”Firedher?Ohpleasedon’ttellme.

Ishakemyheadandfeelallthreepairsofeyesonme.Irubmytemples.“Letmeguess,bitchy

redheadedreceptionist?”ReeseandIan’seyesbothreactthesameway.Irunmyhandsdownmyface.

“Wow,nice,Reese.Haveyoufuckedeverygirlinyourofficeordoyoujusthaveathingfortheonesthat

giveyourcurrenthookupaccesstoyou?”Hedoesn’tanswerthatandit’sprobablyforthebest.Icanfeel

mybloodpressureboilingandIwanttohitsomething.Ineedtohitsomething.“Oneofyoubetterfucking

volunteerorI’mslappingallthreeofyou.”

Joeyimmediatelybacksup.“Fuckthat.WhatthefuckdidIdo?”

IanlooksatReesewhoquicklystepsforward,holdinghishandsouttome.Istepinandslaphim

hard,harderthanI’veslappedhimbeforeandyelpasmyhandbeginstosting.“Shit.”Ishakemyhandand

feelReesegrabit,lookingatitashisreddenedcheekglaresatme.Thatlookslikeithurts.Good.

“Jesus,”IansaysandJoeymufflesalaugh.Theredheadpopsintomymindandsodoestheimageof

hersittingontheparkbenchlastweekend.“OhmyGod.Iknewthatbitchwaspsychotic.”Iyankmyhand

outofReese’sashebeginstorubit.

“Whatareyoutalkingabout?”heasks.

“JulsandIsawthatwhorestaringatyouguyswhileyouplayedbasketballonSunday.Itwasreally

fuckingweird.”MyeyesflickfromIantoReeseandIseeasmallsmilepullatReese’slips.“Whatthe

hellareyousmilingat?YoudorealizethatIhaveanotherhandtoslaptheshitoutofyouwithright?”

“Youwerewatchingourgame?”

Ohdamnit.

“No.”Isnarlandhissmilewidens.IhearamuffledlaughfromIan.“Maybe.That’snot

thepoint.Shewasstaringatyouguysanditwasreallyfuckingcreepy.”Igritmyteeth.“Thatstupidbitch.

ShebetterpraythatIneverseeherfaceagainotherwiseI’mgoingtobreakit.”Iknowmyfaceisblood

redandseeallthreemensmilingatmeinamusement.“Shutup,”Ispatandturnatthesoundoftheshop

dooropening.IfreezeasJustinstepsintothebakeryandpossiblyalsointotheroomhewilldiein.

“Fuck,”JoeyandIsayinunisonasReesemovesquickly,grabbingmewithonearmandpullingme

behindhim.

“Whatthefuckareyoudoinghere?”heblastsasmyeyesstaygluedonJustin.Helooksfuckedup,

seriouslyfuckedup.Eyesareswollen,hisnoseisjackedup,andhehasamassivecutinthecornerofhis

mouth.IbrieflyfeelsorryforhimuntilIrememberhishandsonmelastweek.Hismouthishangingopen

andhiseyeswidenatthesightofReese.Clearly,hewasn’texpectinghimtobehere.

“Itoldyoutostaythefuckawayfromher!”Reeseshouts,loudenoughthatIthinktheglasswindow

rattles.

Ianmovestostandbetweenthetwomen.“Justin,thisisn’tthebesttime,man,”hesaysashekeeps

hishandonReese’sheavingchest.

ThisisnotwhatIneedrightnowandI’mangryenoughtodealwiththisassholemyself.Imove

quicklyoutfrombehindReeseandstepinfrontofJustin,feelingIan’sbodytense.“Isuggestyouleave

nowbeforeIcutyourdickoffandfeedittoyou.”Hiseyeswidenashebacksupslightly.Istepcloser

andclosethegap.“I’dsayI’dmakeyouchokeonitbutlet’sbeserious,thatthingneveroncesatisfied

me.”MyeyesflickquicklytohiscrotchbeforeIsmirkbackinhisface.

“HA!”JoeylaughsbehindmeandIwanttoturnaroundandhigh-fivehimbutIdon’t.Ijustwatch

myexshrinkafewinchesinfrontofme.

“JesusChrist.IjustwantedtoapologizeforwhatIdid,Dylan.I’msorry,okay?”Hiseyesflickto

Reese.“Reallyfuckingsorry.”

MybodyrelaxesabitandInodoncebeforeflickingmyeyestothedoor.“Good,nowgetthefuck

out.”

“Whatever.”HeturnssharplyandleavestheshopandIforcealltheairoutofmylungs.Fuck,Ifeel

likeIneedadrink.

“Shit,Dylan.Remindmenevertocrossyou.You’reabitterrifying.”IanlaughsbehindmeasIspin

toseetwoveryamusedexpressionsandonethatisn’tsoamused.

Reeselooksarightmixofangryandapprehensive.“Ineedtogetbacktoworkbutweneedtotalk

aboutthis.”

Icrossmyarmsovermychest.“Talkaboutwhat?Thatoneofyourtwentyhookupssentmepictures

ofhermakingyoucome?Nah,I’mgood.”Ipushpasthimandfeelhishandonmyarm,spinningmeback

around.

“Wewillfuckingtalkaboutthis,”hegrowlsandputstheboxunderhisarmbeforehepullsmein

andkissesmeforcefullyonthelips.Ihearasoftmoaninmythroatandtrytoswallowitdown.Damnit

stupidbody.Stayangrywithme.Hepullsawayandturnstowardsthedoor.“Let’sgo,Ian.”

JoeyandIstandinthemiddleoftheshopandwatchasthetwohotCPAswalkoutthedoorandpile

intothewhiteRangeRoverparkedoutfront.

**

Therestofthedaygoesbywithoutahitch.Nomoreobscenedeliveriesandnomoremangledex-

boyfriendscominginwithoverdueapologies.Thisdaystartedoutsogreatandturnedawfulwithina

matterofminutes.I’mmiserableandbitchyandJoeyispayingforitbecausehe’stheonlypersonIcan

yellatrightnow.I’dnevercallReeseatworkandcusshimout,nomatterhowpissedoffIwasathim.

I’mmuchmoreofashowupandbargeintohisofficetypeofgirl.ButIwon’tdothattodayeitherbecause

Ireallydon’twanttoseehim.Themanishardtostaymadatinpersonandrightnow,Ineedtostaymad.

Julsiswrappingupwithabrideallday,dealingwithlastminuteweddingpreparationssoshe’sofflimits

too.Somypoorassistanthasbeendealingwithmymoodswings,andtheyhavebeenadoozy.

MainlybecausethememoryoftheamazingnightandmorningIhadwithReesekeepsfilteringinto

thememoryofthephotosIreceived.AndIgetit;it’snothisfaultthatthephotosweresenttome.He

obviouslydidn’tsendthem.Butheallowedthemtobetakenandhadtohaveknownthattheycould

possiblybeleakedorshowntosomebody.I’veneverletanyonetakepicturesofmelikethatortaken

onesofmyselfandsentthemtoanybody.Sowhydidheletherdoit?Didshemeansomethingtohim?

Wasshespecialinsomewayordidheallowallofhishookupstotakepicturesofhimlikethat?That

thoughtmakesmewanttodrinkmyselfintotomorrow.Andthenthere’sthequantitythatIreceived.There

hadtobeatleasttwelvedifferentshotsofhimhavinganorgasm.Twelveseparatetimesthattheyfucked

andshemadehimcome.Wastheremorethanthat?Didsheonlysendmethebestimages?Hiswordsfrom

ourshowertogetherrunthroughme.Idon’tusuallyfuckmyflingsrepeatedly.Sosheobviouslywasn’ta

fling.Shewasmorethanthattohim.Justlikeme.Maybeshegottooclingyandthat’swhyheendedthings

withher.Shewasthegirlhewasn’treallyseriouswithbeforethewedding.Andhe’snotreallyserious

withme.HowamIanydifferentthanher?

“Cupcake,youallright?”JoeyasksasIputthefinishingtouchesonthecakefortheBrown/Tucker

wedding.Eventhoughmymindhasbeenelsewhere,I’mstillabletoputtogetherabeautifulfour-tiered

whitechocolatecreationwithsugaredGerberdaisiescascadingdowntheside.“Dylan?”

Istepbackandadmiremywork.“I’mfine.Comelookatthiswillyou?”Joeyshufflesbackintothe

kitchenandIhearhisreaction,causingmetosmile.Iturnandseehisadoringexpression.“Lookspretty

goodright?”

Hemovesnexttomeandputshisarmaroundmyshoulder,pullingmeagainsthim.“Gorgeous.You

neverceasetoamazeme,cupcake.”Heplantsaquickkissintomyhairasmyphonebeeps.Somehow,

eventhoughIhadhurleditwithallmystrengthagainstmywallearlier,itmanagedtosurvivetheassault.I

reachquicklyintomypocketafterwipingmyhandsoffonmyapron.

Reese:Ineedtoseeyoutonight.

IshowittoJoey.“Wellyouknewthatwascoming,theboyispersistent.”Heleansinandchecks

outtheflowers.“Whatareyougoingtodo?”

IstareathismessagebeforeIanswer.“Idon’tknow,IthinkIneedanightwithmytwobestfriends

andnoboys.Canthathappen?”Hesmilesandpullshisphoneout,quicklymessingwithit.I’lldealwith

ReesetomorrowwhenwebothattendBillyandJoey’sparty.

Hisphonebeepsandheturnstowardsme.“Julsisin,cupcake.Noboys.”Inodandsmileweakly

asIreplytoReese.

Me:Ican’ttonight.Ineedsometimetothink.

JoeywalksbackupfrontwhileIawaithisresponse.Itdoesn’ttakelong.

Reese:Don’tpullawayfromme.

Hegutsmewithhiswords,thesamewordsfromlastnight.IshethatworriedthatI’llendthis?Or

heisjustworriedthatIwon’tgivehimtheopportunitytoexplainthesituation.Itypequickly.

Me:I’mnot.IjustthinkIneedsomespace.Youhavenoidea

whatthisfeelslikeforme.

Igotopresssendbutdon’t,mythumbhoveringoverthebutton.Shit.DoIreallywantspacefrom

him?Hittingthebackbutton,IshortenthemessagebeforeIsendit.

Me:I’mnot.

**

JoeydroveustoJuls’housethatnightafterweclosedupshopandmadeaquickliquorstorerun.

TherewasnowayinhellIwasn’tdrinkingtonight.IwasactuallysurprisedIdidn’tdiveintothevodka

bottlethat’sbeeninmyfreezerformonthsatsomepointtoday.ButI’dneverdrinkatwork,nomatterhow

hurtorpissedoffIwas.Reesehadn’tsentmeanymoremessagesortriedtocall,whichIwasgrateful

for.Butitalsosurprisedme.HewassodamnedpersistentabouteverythingthatIhalfexpectedhimto

bargeintotheshopbeforeclosing,throwmeoverhisshoulder,andtakemehomewithhimsothatwe

couldfuck,talk,andfucksomemore.AndIhatedthatachunkofmewishedhewouldhave.Buttonight

wasn’taboutboys.Itwasaboutspendingtimewithmytwobestfriends,laughingandhangingoutlikewe

didbeforethethreeofusfellfastandhardformembersoftheChicagomancandyclub.

JoeyparkedoutsideJuls’buildingandwewalkedinsidetogether.ShelivedinHydePark,which

wasaboutfifteenminutesfromthebakeryinatwobedroomapartment.She’slivedheresincegraduation

anditoccurredtomeaswewalkeduptheflightofstairstothesecondfloorthatshewouldonlybeliving

hereforafewmoremonths.ShewouldsurelymoveinwithIanaftertheweddingandthethoughtofher

notlivinginthisplacethatheldsomanyofourmemoriessaddenedme.IsighandcatchJoey’sattention

aswestepoutontothefloor.

“Comeon,cupcake,we’reheretohavefun,notsulk.”IfollowhimtoJuls’doorandheopensit

withoutknockingintrueJoeyform.Oncehe’sbeentoyourhouse,hefeelslikehelivestherealongwith

you.

“I’mnotsulking.I’lljustmissthisplaceonceJulsmovesinwithIan.”Wespotherinthekitchen

openingabottleofwineandshebeamsatus.“Doyourememberthattimewethrewthateightiesparty

hereandyoudresseduplikeVanillaIce?”Heblushesatmymemoryasweplopdowninfrontofthe

televisiononthefloor.

Julswalksoverwiththreewineglassesandhandsthemout.“Thatwasfuckinghilarious.Youknew

theentirerapfromTeenageMutantNinjaTurtles,”shesays.Igiggleintomyglassandtakeafewlarge

sips.

“Christ,Iwillneverlivethatshitdown.ThankGodnoonetookanyvideoofthatmess.”

“Thatpartywasinsane,”Julssaysbehindherglass.“Dyl,rememberhowpissedoffyougotat

Justinbecausehewastheonlypersonherenotdressedup?”

Inodandpicturethememory,rollingmyeyesatitandtakingasip.“Whatanasshole.Hespentthe

entirepartybitchingaboutthemusicselections.Itwasafuckingeightiesparty.Whatdidheexpect?”

Joeylaughsaroundhisglass.“Ithinkheexpectedyoutojustleavewithhimandnothavean

amazingtime.Butyouhaveneverbeenthatgirl,cupcake,andheshouldhaveknownthat.Whatawastehe

was.”JulsandImumbleinagreement.

“Awastethatendedupgettingexactlywhathedeserved.Prick,”sheadds,tossinguseachapillow

sowecansprawloutonthefloor.“Arewegoingtotalkaboutthepictures,sweets?”

“No,”Iquicklyreply.

Joeyrollsontohisside.“Youcan’tbemadaboutgirlshe’sfuckedbeforeyou.That’snotfair.He

didn’tevenknowyouwhenthosepicturesweretaken.”

“That’snotwhyI’mmad.”Isitup,glaringatbothofthem.“Well,okay,yesitbothersmethathe’s

beenwithotherwomen.AndIknowitshouldn’tbecauseIwasn’tavirginwhenwestartedthisthing

betweenus,butI’veonlybeenwithJustin.”Iputmyglassdown.“Reesegavemeaballparkfigureof

closetotwentygirlsandthat’safuckinglot.Whichisfine,whatever.Icandealwiththataslongasit’s

notthrowninmyface.Butitwas.”Iclosemyeyesandpictureoneoftheimagesfromthebox.Grabbing

myglassoffthesmalltable,IdownitquicklybeforeIcontinue.“I’mnotevenmadathimaboutthis.Not

evenintheslightest,whichiswhat’smakingthissofuckingconfusing.Theonlythinghedidwrongwas

allowforthepicturestobetakenofhimandnotconfiscatethemafterheendeditwithher.Hedidn’tsend

themtome.Hedoesn’ttalkaboutothergirlsthathe’sbeenwith.HetellsmethatI’mamazingandthatI’m

allhethinksabout.”Isighheavilyandthrowmyselfbackdownontomypillow.“ButnowIhavetodeal

withpsychoticex-hookupsandI’mnotsureI’ddowellinprison.I’mtoohostile.”Thisistrue.I’d

probablyenduppermanentlyinsolitaryconfinementaftergettingintotoomanyfightsordisobeying

orders.

Iglanceoverandseetheburstingsmilesonmytwobestfriends’faces,desperatelytryingtoholdin

theirhysteria.Imotionforthemtoletitoutandthethreeofusfallintoafitofgiggles.

“Alright,soIhaveaquestion,”JoeysaysandIshakemyhead,preparingfortheworsthere.“How

thehelldidyouwindupspendingthenightwithhimlastnight?Ithoughtyouwereagainstsexinbedsand

sleepoversandanythingtoointimate.”

“Yousleptoverathishouse?”Julsasks.

“Itwasanaccident.HewantedtofuckmeinhisbedforhisbirthdaysoIlethimandthenwe

passedouttogether.I’mnotlettingithappenagain.”IglanceoverandseeJoey’smischievousgrinand

Juls’tearyeyes.“What?”

“Youwerehisbirthdaypresent?Ohmy,”shesaysandblinksrapidly.GoodLord,she’semotional

lately.

IglareatJoey.“Andwhat’supwithyou?”

Crossinghishandsbehindhishead,hecontinuesafteradramaticpause.“Ijustthinkit’scutethat

youthinkitwasanaccident.Imean,hecouldhavewokenyouupanddrivenyouhomebuthecalledme

insteadandtoldmethatyouwouldbelatetoday.Itwasnoaccident,cupcake.Hewantedyouthere.”

MyeyeswidenandIsitup.“Hecalledyouthismorning,right?”

Heshakeshisheadandgrinswideatme.“Nope.Hecalledmelastnightafteryoupassedout.”

Ishuffleoverandsitontopofhim,hearinghimsquealunderneathme.“Whatthehelldoyoumean

hecalledyoulastnight?Areyouserious?”HisgrinanswersforhimandIglanceoveratJulswhois

laughinghysterically.“Ican’tbelievethis.Heliedtome.”

“Ohrelax,sweets.Ithinkit’sromanticthathewantedyoutospendthenightwithhim.Howwasit

anyway?”

ThememoryoflastnightrunsthroughmequicklyandIfeelmylipcurlupintoasmile.Ishrugmy

shouldersandplayitoff.“Itwasokay.”Wow.Idon’tevensoundconvincingtomyself.IrolloffJoeyand

laybackdownonmypillow.“Isurehopeheenjoyedhimselfbecausethatshitisneverhappeningagain.”

“Hmmmmm,”Mytwobestfriendssayinunison.Ibitemyliptocontainmylaughbutcrack,letting

itoutastheyfallapartnexttome.Thisishowtherestoftheeveningplaysout.Laughingandjokingon

thelivingfloorinJuls’apartmentaswepolishofftwobottlesofwine.There’sJulsandIan’swedding

talk,JoeyandBilly’smovingintogethertalk,andmineandReese’scrazyfight,hardfuck,hardernon

relationshiptalk.It’samuchneededgabfestamongthreefriendswhousedtoonlyrelyoneachother.

Afterseveralhoursofgossipingandalcoholconsumption,Ipassoutinthemiddleofherlivingroomand

slipintomyReesecoma.

Seventeen

AfterafastbreakfastwithJuls,JoeyandIreturnedtothebakeryandputthefinishingtouchesonthe

weddingcakebeforeloadingitupintoSam.Thereceptionhallwasthirtyminutesawayandtrafficwasa

nightmare,butwemadeitontimeanddroppedthebeautifulwhitechocolateGerberdaisycakeoff

withoutanyissues.IshoweredanddressedaftersayingmygoodbyestoJoeyandlockedtheshopup,

decidingtositoutsideonthebenchthatwasastoredownfromminewhileIwaitedforJuls.Todaywas

dressshoppingdayandIwasn’tsurewhowasmoreexcitedaboutit,herorme.I’veneverbeenina

weddingpartybeforeandwasdelightedtobeapartofIanandJuls’specialday.PlusIwouldhavethe

hottestdateontheplanet.Ofcourse,that’sifwearestilldoingthisthingbetweenusinthreemonths.The

thoughtunsettlesmeandIscrollthroughmyphonewhileIsitonthebench,pullinguphislasttext

message.

Reese:Don’tpullawayfromme.

Whatthehelldoesthatevenmean?

I’msureitdoesn’tmeanthewayI’minterpretingitwhichisin

themostgiganticschemeofthingswaypossible.I’msurehe’sonlyreferringtomyjustifiedfreakoutover

thepicturesIreceivedyesterday.Shit.Thethoughtofthemmakesmequeasy.Hisface,thefacethatIhad

hopedwasonlyreservedformeclearlyisn’tbecauseit’sbeencapturedbyanotherwoman.Isigh

forcefullyandjammyphoneintomyjeanspocket.Howstupidofmetothinkthatheonlylooksatmelike

that.ThatI’mtheonlywomanthathewatchesintentlyashe’scoming.Iclosemyeyestightlyandthe

soundofacarapproachingcausesmetopeekthemopen.Juls’blackEscaladepullsuptothecurbandthe

passengerwindowrollsdownasIstandup.

“Let’sgo,sweets.”

Ismile,pushingalloftheReesedramatotheverybackofmymind.Ican’tthinkaboutthisshitright

now.TodayisaboutJulsandI’mgoingtokeepmymindoccupiedwithallthingsmaidofhonorlike.

**

We’vearrivedatChristian’sBridalShopandafterafewmomentsofquickhysteriaoverthefact

thatweareactuallyshoppingforJuls’weddingdress,wewalkaroundthestoreandperusethe

selections.Juls’sisterBrooke,whowillbetheotherbridesmaidnexttoJoey,metushereshortlyafterwe

arrived.Ihaven’tseenherinawhileandshe’sbeentalkingmyearoffnonstopaboutthelackofmenin

herlifeandprobingforinformationonmine.

“Ohcomeon,Dylan.TellmeallaboutthisguythatworkswithIan.I’mdyingforsomehardcore

gossipandJulswon’ttellmeshit,”shesaysfromthedressingroomnexttome.We’vebeenhandedafew

dresschoicesandI’mcurrentlyslippingmyselfintoachocolatebrownstraplessnumberthatfeelsand

looksincredible.Damn.WoulditbeweirdtobuythisifJulsdoesn’tpickthisforherbigday?Izipup

thebackandopenthecurtain.

“There’snothingtotell.He’sjustaguyI’mhavingfunwith.”Istepoutandhopupontothepedestal

infrontofamassivemirror,seeingJuls’reflectionasshestandsbehindme.

“Holyshit.Ilovethatone.Whatdoyouthinkthough?Isitcomfortable?Doyouthinkweshouldgo

forsomethingmorecheery,likemaybeaburntorangecolor?”

Ispinaroundtofaceher.“Burntorange?Howthehellisthatmorecheery?Andareyoutryingto

makeuslooklikepumpkins?”

ShebitesherbottomlipandeyesupmydressasBrookewalksoutintheexactsameone.“Ilove

thisone.Juls,pickthisbecausetheotherthreearefuckinghideousandmakemelooklikeI’msixmonths

pregnant.”

Julsmovestostandbyhersisterandrunsherhandoverthematerial.“Yup,thisisit.Youbothlook

amazinginitandIlovethecolor.”Shesmilesandbopsherhead.“Wellthatwaswaytoofuckingeasy.

Nowit’stimefortherealfun.”ShewigglesherbrowsandwalkstoherdressingroomwhileBrookeand

Istandandgazeatourreflections.

“Andwhatdoyoumeanyou’rejusthavingfunwiththisguy?Areyoutellingmethatit’sstrictlya

sexthingbetweenyoutwobecauseifyouare,Ithinkthat’sbullshit.GuyscanmakethatshitworkbutI

don’tthinkgirlscan.We’retooemotional.”Jesus.Didshehitthenailontheheadorwhat.Leaveitto

Brooketobeexceedinglyinsightfulwhenshehasn’tevenmettheguyI’mjusthavingfunwithyet.

“I’mkeepingmyemotionsoutofit.”OratleastI’mdesperatelytryingto.

“Ha!Yeah,okay,goodluckwiththat.How’sthesex?”Iglanceoveratherandissuemywicked

grin.“Damn.Ineedtostartcheckingoutofficebuildingsforsmartmen.Youandmysisteraremaking

bank.”

MyphonebeepsinmydressingroomandIhopdownquickly,racingintopullitoutofmy

discardedjeans.Myheartsinksabitatthemessagesender.

Joey:Partyispostponed.Mybabyhasthestomachbugthat’s

goingaround.How’sthedressshoppinggoing?

Me:Ohno!TellBillyIhopehefeelsbetter.Wejustpickedout

ourdressesandJulsistryinghersonnow.I’llsendyouapic.

Wellshit.IguessIwon’tbeseeingReesetonightatthepartyafterall.Mydisappointmentquickly

getsblanketedbytherealizationthatitmightbeagoodthingtogoafewdayswithoutseeinghim.

BetweentheaccidentalbutnotreallyaccidentalsleepovertothephotosIreceived,Ihavealotofshitto

thinkabout.IhearagaspfromBrookeandIquicklyslipoutofmydressingroomandletmyeyesfallon

Julswhohasjustemergedfromhers.Holyshit.

“Holyshit.Juls,ohmy,that’s,ohwow.”TherearenowordstodescribethewomanthatI’mstaring

atrightnow.She’sbeautiful,exquisiteeven,inastraplesstightlacedbodiceandruffledskirt,hertiny

waistaccentedwithadeepbrownsashthatfallsdownherbackandontohertrain.

“Wow.Youlookamazing,”Brookestatesashersistertakesherplaceonherpedestalandbeginsto

twirlslowly.

“It’sbeautifulright?”SheshakesherhandsoutbyhersideandIcantellshe’snervous.

“Whatisit?”

“Idon’tknow.IsitweirdthatIhavenodesiretotryonanyotherdresses?Imean,thisisthefirst

oneIputonandIfeellikethisisit.IcanseemyselfmarryingIaninthis.MaybeIshouldtryonmore.”

“Fuckthat.Whocaresifit’sthefirstoneyoutryon.Youlookamazinginit.Likecrazyamazing.I

cantotallyseeyoumarryingIaninthisdress,”Ireplyandseethetensionleavehershoulders.Leaveitto

Julstoworryaboutthestandardsofbridalgownshopping.HersmilewidensinthemirrorandIcantell

she’sontosomething.“What?”Shequicklyhopsdownandslipsbackintoherdressingroom.

“Damnit.Iwannagetmarried.Therebetteratleastbesomehotgroomsmenformetofoolaround

withatthisthing,”Brookegrunts.

“Thebestmanisofflimits,justsoyouknow,”Ireplyandshesquintsatme.

Julsreemergeswithanothergowninherhandsandwalksovertome,thrustingitintomyarms.

“Here,trythison.”

“What?Areyoucrazy?”ShemustbeifshethinksI’mslippingintoaweddinggown.“Iamnot

tryingonaweddingdress.”

“Whynot?Thiswouldlookamazingonyou,rightBrooke?”OhforChrist’ssake.

Brookestepsupandadmiresthegown.“She’sright,Dylan.It’sahalterandyoualwayslook

amazinginhalterdresseswiththoseboobsofyours.Rememberprom?God,Ifuckinghateyouboth.”

Ibackup.“Youarebothnuts.There’snowayI’mputtingthatthingonoranyotherweddingdress

forthatmatter.I’mprettysureI’dsealmyfateasbeingperpetuallysingleifIdid.”Thiswasanhonest

fear.KarmahasbeenincreasinglyhostiletowardsmelatelyandIcanseehercrossingherarmsand

stompingherfootatmenow,daringmetopushmyluck.

“Ohcomeon,Dyl.Brookewilltrysomeontooright,Brooke?”Webothlookathersisterwhois

sulkingonherpedestal.

“Whatever.Ifuckinghateweddings.”

IshakemyheadandturnbacktoJulswhoisstaringmedown.“No.”

Shestompsherfootandgritsherteeth.“Excuseyou,butasmaidofhonoryou’resupposedtodo

everythingIask.”

“Andthatincludestryingonweddinggowns?Areyoumental?”

ShefrownsbigtimeatmeandImelt.Damnit.“Fine,givemethestupidthing.”Iripitfromher

handsandmarchwithfurytomydressingroomasshesquealsindelight.Thisisinsaneandcompletely

ridiculous.Afterstrippingoutofmymaidofhonordress,Iannoyinglystepintotheweddinggownand

slowlyzipitup,myeyeswideningasIgazedownatmyself.“Ohshit,”Iwhisper,obviouslynotlow

enoughbecauseJulsripsopenthecurtain.

“Wow.Youlookincredible.”Shepullsmefrommyroomandpushesmeupontothepedestalas

Brookewalksupbehindme.

“Damn,Dylan.Woulditbeweirdtoputthatshitonholdindefinitely?”

Ismilesubtlyathercommentandgazeatmyreflection.Mychesttightensatthesightofmyself.Me,

inaweddinggown,andIlookamazing.Crap.I’mcoveredinlacefrommydetailedhalterdowntomy

train.Iwasneverafanoflacebutrightnow,standinginthisdress,I’mahugefan.Aclickingsound

comesfrombehindmeandIturntoseeJulstakingapictureofmewithherphone.“Whatthehell?”

“Ohrelax.Iwon’tsendittoanysexyCPAsoranything.It’sjustforus.”Ican’timaginewhatwould

happenifReesegotaholdofthatpicture.He’dprobablyfreakthefuckoutandendthingsforsure.Talk

aboutbeingclingy.“Seriously,Dylan,lookatus.”Julshopsupontomypedestalandgrabsmyhand,

linkingitwithhers.Besidesthefactthatwearebothstandinginweddinggowns,humorously,we’re

completeoppositesinappearance.Julswithherdarkbrownstraighthairandmewithmyuberblond

naturallywavymess,herpiercingblueeyescontrastwithmywidebrownonesthatseemtotakeupthe

majorityofmyface,andshe’sagoodthreeinchestallerthanmeasIstanduponmytoestobringmeupto

her5’9height.“Goof.I’mgettingmarried,Dyl.”

“YouareandI’mnot,soI’mgettingthefuckoutofthisthing.”ShegigglesasIhopdownandslip

backintomydressingroom.ButbeforeItakeitoff,Iadmiremyselfaloneforabriefmoment.I’venever

givenmuchthoughttogettingmarried.Havingonlybeeninoneseriousrelationship,Justinnever

appealedtomeasthemarryingkindwhichnowseemsironicsinceheismarried.Justnothappily,or

faithfully.Butstandinginthisdressrightnow,forthefirsttimeinmylifeIcanpicturemyselfwalking

downtheaisletowardstheonepersonIwanttospendmylifewith.AndbeforeIcanputafacetothat

oneperson,Islipoutofthedressandbackintoreality.

AftersayinggoodbyetoJulsandhersister,Ispendtherestofthedaykeepingmyselfbusywitha

massiveamountofbaking.Sevendozenmuffins,sixbatchesofcookies,andanassortmentofpastries

later,Ifinallyslipupstairsandcrash,passingoutimmediately.

**

IwakeupcrankyandmiserableonSundaymorning,havingexperiencedoneoftheshittiestnightsof

sleepI’veeverhad.Itossedandturnedallnight,myusualdreamsofReeseandItogetherreplacedwith

himandastringofwomenwithredhairwhohe’sfuckingrelentlessly.Iwakeupconstantlydrenchedin

sweatandwhenIpassbackout,anotherredheadreplacesthepreviousone.IchalkituptothefactthatI

haven’tseenorheardfromhimsinceFridayafternoonandI’mindesperateneedofmyfix.Buthehasn’t

calledmeortextedandIhavenofuckingcluehowtointerpretthat.Comingfromamanwhopursuedthe

shitoutofme,sendingmesweetnotesandpackages,andtextingmedaily.Andnow,nothing.Panicruns

throughmethatI’veactuallyroyallyfuckedthisupbytellinghimIneededtimetothink.Buttimetothink

doesn’tmeanleavemealone.Itjustmeanswhatitmeans.ThatI’vebeenthinking,whichIhaveandI’m

donewith.

I’vedecidedthatI’mdonebeingpissyoverthephotosIreceivedFridaybecauseit’snotdoingme

anygood.Itwasn’thisfaultandknowinghim,I’msurehe’sdealtwiththatspitefulbitchtopreventany

futuredeliveriesfromher.Ihavenorighttobemadorjealousabouthisprevioushookups,especially

sincewe’renotserious.AndI’vealsodecidedthatI’mokaywiththat.ThisiswhatReesewants,theonly

thinghedoes,andI’mhavingfundoingitwithhim.Irefusetoletmyemotionsscrewthisupbecausethis,

whatwe’redoing,isthebestthingI’veeverdonewithaman.He’ssweetandfunandhotashell.Andhe

choseme.Ofallthegirlsliningup,hechoseme.Whatwe’redoingisenoughforhimanditcanbeenough

forme.Idon’tneedtobeinaseriousrelationshiptobehappy,I’veneverbeenthishappybeforeinmy

life.ThesoundofmyphoneringingsendsmesprintingupthestairswhereIpluggeditinbeforeIdecided

toorganizemypantry.DisappointmentrunsthroughmeasJulsnamesflashesacrossmyscreen.

“Hey,what’sup?”

“Canyoumeetme,likerightnow,sweets?IreallyneedtotalktosomeoneandIwantittobeyou.”

Shesoundsupset.Julsneversoundsupset.

“Yeahofcourse.Where?”

“ThecoffeeshoponWestElmokay?I’monlyfiveminutesaway.”

“Okay,I’mleavingnow.”

Ihangupanddressquickly,grabbingmykeysandlockingupbehindmeasIdasharoundthecorner

whereIkeepSamparked.Juls’voiceisreallyworryingmeandIwanttogettoherasfastasIcan.She’s

neverupset.HertwofavoriteemotionsareelatedhappinesswhichisfrequentlatelyafterIancameinto

herlife,andpissedoffhurricaneJulsmode.ThedrivetoBrocksCoffeeShopisashortdistantfromthe

bakeryandIparkbehindherblackescalade,hoppingoutquicklyanddashingintothebuilding.Ispother

atatableinthecorner,herdaintyhandswrappedaroundacoffeecup.

“Hey.Sorryifyou’vebeenwaitinglong.Fuckingtraffic.”

“No,Ijustsatdown.Doyouwantsomethingtodrink?”TypicalJulsalwaysconcernedaboutother

peopleandnotwhat’sbotheringher.Godloveherforit.

“No,I’mfine.What’swrong?Yousoundedupsetonthephone.”

Sheglancesdownintohermug.“Idon’tknowwhat’swrongwithme.IanandIwentoutyesterday

afterIdroppedyouoffandcheckedoutsomeweddingvenuesandreceptionhalls,andIjustdidn’tcare.

Likeatall.Imean,whatthefuck?I’vebeendreamingaboutmyweddingdaysinceIwassix.”Hereyes

fillupwithtearsassheturnsthemuptome.Ireachoverandcoverherhandwithmine.“Iloveweddings,

everythingaboutthem.That’swhyIbecameaweddingplanner.Butwhenitcomestomyownwedding,

it’slikeIhavezeroopinionaboutanything.Idon’tcarewhetherornotwegetmarriedinachurchorif

it’sanoutdoorceremony,Idon’tcarewhatmusicIwalkdowntheaisletoorwhatfavorstheguestswill

receiveorwhatmycakelookslike,nooffense.”

Mylipscurlupintoasmile.“Nonetaken.”

“Idon’tevencarewhothehellisinvited.AllIcareaboutismarryinghim.AslongasIan’sthere,

that’sallIcareabout.”Sheblinksandhertearsfalldownhercheek.“Dylan,honestly,doyouthink

there’ssomethingwrongwithme?”

Ilaughsoftlyandshakemyhead.“No,notatall.Ithinkyou’refocusingontheonlythingthat

matters.Whocaresabouteverythingelse?”Myhandsqueezeshersandshesmiles.“Ikindoflovethat

marryingIanistheonlythingthatmatterstoyou,becauseit’stheonlythingthatshouldmatter.You’re

goingtospendtherestofyourlifewiththismanwhoclearlyworshipsthegroundyourprettylittlefeet

walkon,sowhogivesashitwhatthefuckingcenterpieceslooklikeorwhatthedinneroptionsareforthe

guests.Fucktheguests.”Sheburstsoutlaughingandshakesherheadatmeandmostlikelyherselffor

thinkingthisway.Although,Iamalittleshockedthatshedoesn’thaveafewthingsshe’sdeadseton.

“Iloveyou,Dylan.Youreallyaretheonlypersonthatunderstandsme.”

Leaningback,Icrossmylegsunderthetable.“WellandIanI’msure.Sowhatdoeshesayaboutall

this?”

Shetakesaquicksipofhercoffee.“Hekeepssaying‘whateveryouwant,babe’whichwouldbe

perfectifIhadanyopinionsatall.Ikindofwishhewouldjusttakeoverandmakeallthedecisions

becauseifheleavesituptome,nothing’sgoingtogetdone.Exceptmydresschoiceofcourse.”

“Ofcourse,andwhatadress.Doesthatthingevenneedtobealteredbecauseitfityouperfectly?”

“Hmmmsodidyours,bothofthem.”Shepullsoutherphoneandswipesthescreenafewtimes

beforehandingitover.

Iglancedownatthepictureofmestaringatmyreflectioninthelacehalterdress.Jesus,itlooks

good.“Ishouldmakeyoudeletethisinfrontofme.”Ihandherbackherphone.

“Notachanceinhell.”Sheslipsitbackaway,quicklysoIdon’tgrabitanddeleteitmyselfI’m

sure.“What’snewwithReese?Youheardfromhimsincethepictureincident?”

MystomachknotsupandIsighloudly,rubbingmyhandsdownmyface.“No,notapeep.ButI

guessthedistanceisgoodrightnow.Wereallyshouldn’tbeattachedatthehip.”

“Dylan.”

Iglanceupatherseriousface.“Julianna.”Inevercallherbyherfullnameandcanbarelysayit

withoutsmiling.

Sherollshereyes.“Areyouinlovewithhim?”

Ileanmyelbowsontothetableandcovermyfacewithmyhands.Afteraslowexhale,Ireply

honestly,“Idon’tknow.IfeellikeI’mputtingalotofenergyintonotfallinginlovewithhim,butit’sthe

hardestthingI’veeverdone.”Iglanceoverather.“Foraguythatnormallydoesn’tdotherelationship

thing,Ithinkhe’dbedamngoodatit.ButhowstupidwouldIbetofallinlovewithsomeonethatdoesn’t

doanythingserious?I’djustbesettingmyselfupforamajorheartbreakright?”Ibegintorubmytemples

asshefightsasmile.“I’veneverlovedanymanbefore.DefinitelynotJustin.ButwithReese?Fuck,I

don’tknow.”

Sheleansforwardandrubsmyarm.“Justbecausehe’sneverdonerelationshipsbeforeoranything

besidescasualfucking,doesn’tmeanheisn’tcapableofdoingit.Dylan,forChrist’ssake.Themanis

crazyaboutyou.Everyonecanseethat.”

“He’scrazyaboutfuckingme.”Iglancearoundquicklytomakesuremyheightenedvoicedidn’t

drawanyunwantedattention.“That’sallthisis.”

“You’rereallyfuckingstupidifyouthinkthat’strue.Justgrowapairandtellhimhowyoufeel

already.”

Ishakemyheadatherandpursemylipsasshesipshercoffee.OfcourseJulsdoesn’tunderstand

whereI’mcomingfromhere.SheandIanhavebeenmorethanserioussincetheystarteddating.Athought

that’sbeenrunningthroughmymindsinceFridaycomesstreamingback.WhydidReeseenditwiththat

redheadedpyscho?Wasitbecauseshewantedmore,thatshewasinlovewithhimandhedidn’tor

couldn’tfeelthesameway?Ican’thelpbutthinkthesamefateislinedupformeifIweretoletmyself

fall,soIwon’t.I’mgoingtokeepthoseunwantedfeelingsburieddeepinsidemefornow,untilmaybehe

eventuallydecideshewantsmore.PleaseGodlethimwantmore.

**

IcrawledintobedSundaynightaftergettingabitetoeatwithJuls.Webothwantedmorethanjust

coffeeinoursystemandateatalocalThaiplacethatwefrequentedoften.Iwrappedmyselfupinmy

comforterandtheUniversityofChicagoT-shirtthatReeselentmeandstaredatmyalarmclock.Itwas

onlyalittleafter8:00p.m.andknewIwouldn’tpassoutanytimesoon,butIwasatleastgoingtotry.

Closingmyeyes,Ipicturehisface,thefaceIcatchhimhavingwhenhe’swatchingme,studyingme.

Creaseinhisbrow,jawset,eyesnarrowedinonwhateveritisthatI’mdoing.Alwayssostudious.

Aloud,deafeningcrashsendsthemflyingbackopen.Whatthehellwasthat?Ishootoutofbedand

dashdownthestairs,skiddingtoastopbehindmyworktopwhenIseeahoodedfigurestandingoutside

mynowshatteredglassstorefrontthroughthedoorway.“Ohshit.”Panic,sheerpanicrunsthroughmeand

Idashbackupstairs,grabmyphoneoffmynightstand,andbegindialingtheonlypersonIcanthinkof.

“Pickuppickuppickup.”Idartintomybathroomandcloseandlockthedoorbehindme.Jesus

Christ!Someone’sbrokenintomybakery!Whothefuckbreaksintoabakery?Afterthreelongrings,I

hearhisvoice.

“Dylan?”

“Reese!Someone’sinmyshop!Iheardaloudcrashandrandownstairsand---”

“Whereareyou?Areyousafe?”HisvoiceisfilledwithworryandIcantellhe’sonthemove.Oh

God,pleasebeatyourplaceandnotfarfromme.

“I’minmybathroom.TheybrokethewindowandIsawsomeone.”Ihearcommotion,alotof

commotionthroughthephoneasIcrawlintomybathtubandclosetheshowercurtain.Likethat’sgoingto

doanygoodiftheydecidetobreakintothebathroom.ThisissohorrormovieclichéIalmostrollmy

eyesatmyself.“Please,Ineedyou.”Icry,droppingmyheadbetweenmykneesandlettingmyselfsob.

“Stayinthere.Don’tcomeoutnomatterwhatyouhear.GODDAMNIT.SHIT.”Echoesof

footstepsringthroughthephoneandhe’soutofbreathbuthiscursewordskeepflying.“I’monmyway.

Callthepolice.”

“NO.Pleasedon’tmakemehangup.”I’mcrying,shakingwithfearandmywordsarebrokenand

strained.Ihearthesoundofacarstarting.

“Fuck.Movethefuckoutoftheway!”Carhornsandanotherstringofcusswordscomethroughthe

phoneasIclutchittightly.“Love,youhavetocallthepolice.I’malmostthere.Iwon’tletanything

happentoyou,Ipromise.Justhangupandcallthemandthencallmebackokay?”

“Okay,okay.Pleasehurry.”

“Iam.”

Iquicklyhangupanddial911,rapidlytellingthemthesituationandgivingthemmylocation.They

tellmethatthepoliceareontheirwayandtostaywhereIam.That’snotgoingtobeaproblem.Ihave

zerointentionofmovingfromthisspotuntilIhearReeseontheothersideofthedoor,eventhoughI

haven’theardanoisecomingfrombelowmesincethesoundofthewindowbreaking.Ihangupanddial

himagain.

“I’mhere.Don’topenthedooruntilIgetupthere,okay?”

“Okay,butstayonthephonewithme.”Ihearhisheavybreathingandthesoundofglasscrunching

andcracking.Godpleasedon’tletthatpersonstillbehere.IfIhearReesegettingintoastrugglewith

someonethere’snowayinhellI’mstayinginthisbathroom,Idon’tcarewhattheconsequencesare.I

willclawthefucker’seyesoutifheputshishandsonReese.Ihearfootstepsoutsidethedoorandhold

mybreath.

“Dylan?”

Idropmyphoneandcrawloutofthetub,scramblingforthelockandswingingthedooropen.I

don’tevenregisterhisappearancebeforeIjumpintohisarmsandclingtohim.“OhmyGod,Iwasso

scared.”I’mholdingontohimlikeIhaven’tseenhiminyears,mybodycompletelygluedtohis.“Ishe

stillhere?”

Hisarmswrapmeupandhebreathesintomyhair,hischestheavingagainstmine.“Dylan.”Imoan

softlyatthesoundofmyname.“It’sokay,I’vegotyou.Ididn’tseeanyonebutyourfrontwindowis

completelysmashedtoshit.”Hecarriesmeawayfromthebathroomandintomybedroomarea.

I’mshakingagainsthisbodyandtightenmygrip.“JesusChrist.Whywouldsomeonebreakintomy

bakery?Doyouthinktheywantedtreats?”Ihearasmallmuffledlaughescapehislipsthatarepressed

intomyhair.Mytearsarestreamingdownmyfaceasheplacesmeonmyfeetinfrontofmydresser.I

lookhimoverandtakeinhisappearance.Hairarightmess,nodoubtfromtheroughtreatmentofhis

handsashedroveoverhere,clenchedjaw,andprominentcreaseinhisbrow.Hisgreeneyesareburning

intomineandeventhoughthey’refilledwithworry,theystillcarrythesameintensityasalways.

“Here,youneedtoputonpantsbeforethepolicegethere.They’regoingtowanttoaskyou

questions.”HestartsriflingthroughmydrawersandIseehimtakingoutseveralpairsofpants,tops,and

panties.

“Umm,doIneedtoputonlayers?”Iwipeunderneathmyeyesandfinallystopmytears.Nowthat

Reeseishere,I’mnolongerscaredandtheonlyemotionrunningthroughmerightnowiselatedjoyfrom

thesheersightofhim.

“No,butyou’renotstayingheretonightsoyouneedtopacksomeclothes.I’mtakingyouhomewith

me.”Heglancesoveratmeasheclosesmydrawers.

“Okay,”Ireply,pickingupapairofjeansandslidingthemupmylegs.

“Really?You’renotgoingtotryandtellmethatyoucouldjuststayatJuls’house,orthatyou’renot

breakingthenosleepoverruleagain?You’rejustgoingtosayokay?”HelooksutterlyshockedandI

almostlaugh.Jesus,amIthatdefiant?

“Yes,I’mnotalwayssoargumentative.”ThesoundofpolicesirensflowupthestairsandIquickly

grababraandputiton,keepinghisT-shirtonintheprocess.

Henoticesitandsmilesabitasheplacesmythingsinanearbydufflebag.“Doyouneedanything

else?”

Itakeaquicklookaroundtheroom.“Umm,Iguessjustmybathroomstuff.”Iscurryinthereand

grabmytoothbrush,hairbrush,facewash,moisturizer,phoneofftheshowerfloor,andconditioner

becauseI’mmorethanhappytousehisshampooandbodywash,spinningtoseehimstandinginthe

doorway.He’sstudyingme,eyesnarrowedinonthecollectioninmyhands.“What?I’magirlandIcan’t

takeanothershoweratyourplacewithoutconditioner.Wecan’tallhavegorgeousnoproductnecessary

hairlikeyou.”HislipscurlupasIdropthegoodiesintomyduffleandfollowhimdownthestairs.

Aftertalkingtothepoliceandgivingthemmyveryvaguedescriptionofthehoodedfigurestanding

outsidemyshop,theyaskmeifIknowofanyonewhomighthavepossiblywantedtohurtmybusinessor

mepersonally.MyeyesquicklyflickedtoReesewhoclenchedhisjawbeforegivingthemhisex-

receptionistnameandinformation.HetoldthemaboutthepackageIreceivedandclaimedthatshe

becameunstableafterhestoppedseeingher.IhadassumedthefigureIsawstandingoutsidewasaman

becauseofthedarkhoodiecoveringtheirface,butIguessitcouldhavejustaseasilybeenawoman.I’m

assuredthatmyinsurancewillcoverthedamage,whichluckilywasonlytooneofmywindows.No

damagewasdonetotheinsideoftheshopwhichIwasextremelygratefulfor.Thepolicefoundabrick

thatwasusedtobreaktheglassthathadslidunderneathmyconsultationtableandweregoingtodustit

forprints.Iwouldonlyhavetoremainclosedforonedayforthewindowtogetrepairedsothatwasn’t

toobad.Itcouldhavebeenalotworse.Wayworse.

Aswedriveinsilencetohisbuilding,thenightIjustenduredisthelastthingonmymind.Right

now,withmydufflebagpackedfullofclothessittingbehindmeinthebackseat,theonlythingonmy

mindisthatI’llbehavinganothersleepoverwithReese.AndIcan’thelpbuttenseinmyseatatthe

anticipationofit.

Eighteen

He’squiet,tooquietashewalksintohiscondoandplacesmybagonthefloornexttothecouch.He

hasn’tsaidtwowordstomesinceweleftthebakeryandit’smakingmyskincrawl.Iplopdownontothe

couchandkickmyshoesoff,bringingthemunderneathmybodyasIhearhimbangingaroundinthe

kitchen.

“Here.”HehandsmeabottledwaterandItakeit,seeinghimwalkaroundthecouchandsitonthe

farend,waythehellawayfromme.Hebeginsflippingthroughthechannelsandstopsonsomebasketball

gamethatIcouldn’tcarelessabout.Whatthefuckisthis?HecomestomyrescueandIknowdamnwell

Iheardhimcallmelovewhichmeanshecan’thateme,asksme,no,tellsmethatI’mcomingtospend

thenightwithhim,andnowhe’sbarelyacknowledgingthatI’mevenhere.Iturnmyheadandstareat

himandhisperfectprofileasitremainsimpassivebutinterestedinthegamehe’swatching.He’sin

runningshortsandanavyblueT-shirtthathassomeemblemonthefrontthatIcan’tmakeout.Several

longminutesgobyashiseyesremainonthetelevision,notonceflickingtowardsme.Jesus,isthishow

it’sgoingtobeallnight?Finethen.IfI’msleepingover,I’matleastgoingtogetcomfortable.Istand

upandquicklyshimmyoutofmyjeans,tossingthemontopofmyduffleandreachupandslipmyT-shirt

off.TurningaroundsoIknowhecanseeme,Idropitonthecouchandremovemybra.Imakequickeye

contactwithhimasIslipmybradownmyarms,hiseyeslingeringbriefly,reallyfuckingbrieflyonmy

chestbeforeflickingbacktowardsthegame.Igruntandgrabhist-shirtandslipitbackonbeforeIsnatch

theremoteoutofhishandsandturnthetelevisionoff.

“Whatthefuck?”

“Whatthefuckisright.What’swrongwithyou?You’reactingweird.”

Hereachesforwardandpluckstheremoteoutofmyhand,turningthegamebackon.“HowamI

supposedtobeacting?”HiseyesgobacktothegameandInolongerwanttobehere.Pickingupmy

duffle,IquicklybutmypantsbackonandthrowmybrainsideasIsliponmyshoesandturntowardsthe

door.“Wherethehellareyougoing?”

“Likeyougiveashit.ThanksformakingsureIdidn’tgetmurdered.”I’malmostoutthedoorwhen

hisarmsgrabmywaistandpullmebackinside,lockingthedoorbehindus.

“You’renotgoinganywhere.”I’mpickedup,carriedinhisusualcavemanstylemannerandtaken

backovertowardsthecouch,myduffledroppedbytheedgeandmedroppedonthecushion.

“Youdon’twantmehere,obviously,sowhyshouldIstay?”Iyellupintohisstare.Hishandscome

aroundme,bracinghimselfonthecushionbehindmeandbringinghisfaceinchesfrommine.

“WhatthefuckmakesyouthinkIdon’twantyouhere?Ialwayswantyouhere.”

“Youhaven’tcalledortextedmesinceFridayafternoon,Igettoplessinfrontofyouandyoubarely

react,andyou’renotlookingatmethewayyoulookatme.Youdon’tevenwantmeanymore.Youjust

wantyourstupidgame.”TearsfillmyeyesandI’mnotsureifit’sfromthenightI’veenduredorthe

Reesestylerejectionthat’sknockingthewindoutofme.Hishanddropsandgrabsmine,forcingitagainst

themassivebulgeinhispantsthatIhadn’tnoticed.Ohwow.

Hisfaceinchescloser.“Ialwayswantyou.”Andthenithappens.Hismouth,hishands,his

everythingisonmeinseconds,rippingmyremainingclothesoffasIfranticallytryandkeepupwiththe

removalofhis.

“Tellmeyoustillwantme,”hegruntsasheflipsmeontomyhandsandkneesandpositionshimself

behindme.BeforeIcananswertheobviousresponse,heramsintomeandIcryoutattheforce.

“REESE.”Igriptheleatherwithmyfingers,scratchingintoitwithmynailsashepoundshardthen

harderintome.

“Answerme,Dylan,”hegruntsandIyelloutbetweencries.

“Yes.Yes,I’llalwayswantyou.”He’sfuckingmeharderthanheeverhasandIknowit’sbecauseI

challengedhimandhe’sprovinghimselftome.Thatorhe’smakingdamnsureIdon’tquestionitagain.

Eitherway,I’mlettinghimhandleit.Hishandsgripmyhips,pullingmebacktomeethimandifIwasn’t

soturnedon,sohotforhimallthetimeImightnotbeabletohandlehispower.I’mmoaning,cryingout

witheachthrustandhe’srighttherewithme.“OhGod.Harder.”

“Shit.Youwantharder?”Histhighscrashagainstmineandmyelbowsgiveout.“Thishardenough

foryou,love?”

“Yes!”Iscream,needinghimtogivemethisrightnow.Ipushbackagainsthimandfeelhisone

handgripmyshoulderwhiletheotherdigsintomyhipthewayIlike.

Hegroansloudly,hissoundsfillingthecondo.“Youdrivemefuckingcrazy.Fuck,Dylan.”

“Touchme.”Hishandwrapsaroundmystomachanddropsbetweenmylegs.Iwhimperashis

fingersrubmyclitwhilehisotherhandgripsharderonmyshoulder.He’ssoforcefulthathe’sknocking

theairoutofmylungs.“I’mgonnacome.”Imanagetogetoutthroughafaintbreath.

“Notyet.Waitforme.”

Ireachdowntoremovehisfingersbuthetightensagainstme,movingtheminhisperfectrhythm.“I

can’t.Please.”

HeramsintomeharderandIcryout,hearinghisloudthroatygrowl.“Now,love.”AndIletitgo,

allofit.Thepainofthepastseveraldayswithouthim,theangerfromthepictures,theterrorofthe

hoodedfigure.Iletitgoandfeelhim,justhim.I’mpanting,barelyabletotakeinafullbreathasmy

upperbodycollapsesdownontomyforearmsandIfeelhisheaddroptomyback.

HotbreathwarmsmyspineandIloosenmygripontheleather.“Holdon.”HepullsoutofmeandI

winceabitinpain,whichhasneverhappenedwithhimbefore.Ofcourse,I’veneverbeenfuckedlike

thatbefore,sohardthatmyteethchatterwitheachpush.Irollontomyside,facingthecushionsandcurl

intoaball.Thatwasintense,reallyintenseandI’mactuallyabitsoreafterthatReesestylefucking.He

returnsmomentslaterholdingawashcloth.“Lieonyourback.”Iobeyandkeepmyeyesonhimashe

wipesmeclean,gentlyafterhenoticesmyscrunchedupface.“Ihurtyou.”

“I’mokay,itdoesn’thurtthatmuch.”Hebendsdown,plantingagentlekissbetweenmylegsbefore

hescoopsmeupintohisarms.Iquicklyburymyfaceinhisneckandnuzzletheshitoutofhim.“Mmm,

thisismyfavoritespot,righthere.”Iinhaledeeplyandletoutasoftmoan.

“Iknow,youseekitoutoften.”Hecarriesmeintohisbedroomandplacesmegentlyonthebed.I

pullthecoversaroundmeandscootovertoallowhimsomespace.

“NowthatI’vefuckedsomesenseintoyou,letmebeperfectlyclearaboutsomething.”I’vealready

settledonhischest,mylegdrapedoverhisandmyhandwrappedaroundhiswaistasmyeyesslowly

glanceupathim.“Ihaven’tcalledortextedyousinceFridaybecauseyoutoldmethatyouneededtimeto

think.AndIdon’tknowwhatthefuckthatmeansbecausenowomanhasevertoldmethatbeforebutI

assumeditmeantthatyoudidn’twanttohearfromme.”Hisfingersgentlystrokemyback,trailingacross

myskinandImoansoftly.

“Okay.”

“AndjustbecauseIdon’tjumponyourbreaststhemomentyouwhipthemoutdoesn’tfuckingmean

Idon’twantto.Ididn’tknowwherewestoodsoIwasn’tgoingtopushmyluck.”Ibitemyliptoholdin

mysmile.Helooksrightlyirritatedwithhavingtoexplainhimselfbuttheexplanationisneeded.“Dylan,

I’mreallysorryaboutthosephotos.”

“Idon’twanttotalkaboutit.I’mdonetalkingandthinkingaboutit.BetweenFridaynightwithJoey

andJulsandalldayyesterdayandtoday,I’mdone.”Myarmwrapstighteraroundhim.“Nothing’s

changedbetweenus.Itdidn’tchangeanything.”

HeliftsmychinuptomeethisfaceandIseethetensioninhisjaw.Helooksunsureandthatlook

sendsapanicthroughme.Nothing’schangedforme,buthasitforhim?Isitupquicklyandmovetolie

nexttohimwhenhishandsgrabmywaistandpullmebackdown,onlythistimeI’mflippedaround,

straddlinghim.Themovement’ssoquickIbarelyhavetimetoregisterit.“Don’t,”hestates.

Itakeasecondtostudyhisfeaturesinmynewposition,giventhefactthatwe’renoweyetoeye.

CrazymessofhairthatI’mnoticingmakeshimlookyoungerthanheis,greeneyesthatarenarrowedinon

mine,andstubble?Alotofstubble.Ireachoutandbrushmyhandalonghischinandcan’tcontainmy

smile.Ohman.Reesewithadayortwoworthoffacialhairissexybeyondbelief.“Whydidyoujusttry

tomoveawayfromme?”

Ishakemyheadquickly.

“Dylan.”OhMisterpersistent.

“Nothing’schangedformebuthasitchangedforyou?”Iaskquickly,gettingoutthequestionI

fearedtheanswertobeforeIcanthinkmyselfoutofit.

“No,”heanswersfirmly.

“Soyoustillwantthis?”

Hedropshisheadandithitstheheadboardwithaloudthump.“Yes,whateverthefuckthisis,Istill

wantit.You’reincontrolhere,Dylan.Youhaveallthefuckingcontrol.”Hiseyesareburningintomine

withthesameintensitythey’vealwaysshownforme.I’mincontrol?Ofwhat?Ofus?Idecidenotto

probebecauseI’mnotsureIwanttoknowtheanswer.Heletsoutaforcefulbreaththatwarmsmyface.

“Ifsomethingwouldhavehappenedtoyoutonight…”Hiseyesclosetightandthecreaseinhisbrow

appears.OhReese.Theman’smoodswingsareenoughtogivemepermanentwhiplash.

“Nothinghappened.I’mokay.Icalledyouandyoucameforme.”Ireachoutandstrokehisfaceas

hiseyespopbackopen,greenandblazing.Histensenesssoftensabit.

“ItriedlocatingHeatherandsortingthisshitoutwithherbutIdidn’tfindher.Allfuckingweekend

I’vebeenlooking.”Hegritshisteeth.“Shewasn’tatherhouseandshe’snotansweringmycalls.”I

swallowloudlyandheshakeshishead.“I’mfuckingdealingwithitIjustwantedyoutobeprepared.

Freddidn’tdeliverthatpackagesojustdon’topenanythataren’tfromhim.Okay?”Inod.Jesus.Ireally

don’twanttohavetodealwiththisagain.ButifReeseisdealingwithitthenI’msureitwillbedealt

with,inaveryReeselikemannernoless.“Butaftertonight,Dylan,Idon’twantyoutherebyyourself.”

Hishandsgripmywaistandpullmeclosertohim,ourforeheadsfallingtogether.

“Idon’twanttobetherebymyselfeither,butIwanttokeepaneyeonmyshop.It’simportantto

me.It’smineandI’veworkedhardforit.”Hishandreachesupandpullsmybunloose,lettingmyhair

falldownmyback.“I’mgoingtohaveadoorinstalledatthetopofthestairs.I’llcallaboutgettingit

donealongwiththewindowrepairandasecuritysystemtomorrow.Ican’tbelieveIneverthoughtabout

havingsometypeofsysteminplacealready.”HenodsatmebutIknowthatisn’twhathewantstohear.I

leaninandkisshimgently.“I’llbefine,I’velivedthereonmyownforthreeyears.Plus,Ihaveyouand

you’reonlyfiveminutesawayifsomethinghappens.”

Hishandsbrushlightlydownmyback,playingwiththeendsofmyhair.“Itwillnevertakemefive

minutestogettoyou.IthinkImadeitthereintwotonight.”Igiggleslightlyandseehislipscurlup.“I

mightbegettingafewredlightcameranotificationsinthemail.”

“Worthit?”Iask,runningmyhandsthroughhishair.

“Worthit.Youhungry?”

Inodfranticallyandhelaughs,theinfectioussoundpullingmeinwithhim.“Sittight.”I’mslidoff

ashehopsoutofbed,disappearingdownthehallwayasIwatchhisgloriousbacksidestrideaway.

LaughingquietlyattherealizationthathealwaysasksmeifI’mhungryaftersex,Igraboneofhispillows

andpressittomyface,inhalingdeeplyashisvoicecomesdownthehallway.

“Doyoulikeyourpizzacoldorheatedup?

“Cold.”Yum.ColdpizzaandasleepoverwithReese?Yesplease.Glancingaroundtheroom,Ispot

hisiPadonhisdresser.Iscrambleoutofbedandgrabit,flippingitopenandturningiton.Ihavesome

googlingofacertainCPAtodo.Thescreencomestolife.Oh.Ohmy.Thewallpaperisapictureofme,

inthisbed.I’msleeping,curleduponmysidewiththesheetscoveringmeuptoshowonlyatinybitof

cleavage.Myhairisamessofblondwavesthatarespillingdownmyrightshoulderandmylipsare

parted.ThecameraismainlyfocusedonmyfaceandIlooktobeinadeepsleep.IlookupandseeReese

staringatme,stoppedinthedoorwaycarryingourfood.

“Umm,youfoundmyiPadIsee.”Hemovestowardsthebedandputstheplatesdownonhis

nightstand,hiseyesonlymomentarilyleavingmine.“Nobodyseesthat.Iwouldnevershowthatto

anybody.”

Placingitdownonthebed,Igetuponmykneesandcrawltotheedgewherehe’sstanding,pulling

himtowardsmeandwrappingmyarmsaroundhisneck.Afteramoment’shesitation,hewrapshisarms

aroundmeandrelaxesagainstmybody.“You’renotmad?Icantakeitoff.”

Ireacharoundandplacemyhandoverhismouth,silencinghim.“I’mnotmad.Itcanstayonthere.”

Droppingmyhands,Iscootbackoverandreachoutformyplateplayfullyashissmilereturns.

“Coldpizzahuh?IthoughtIwastheonlyotherpersonthatstillpreferreditcoldtoheated.”

Itakeabiteandshakemyhead.“Ihateheatedleftoverpizza.Thecheesegetsallrubberyand

gross.”HedropsachilledbottledwaterinmylapandIyelp.“So,whydidyoutakethatpictureofme?”

Hestopschewingbriefly,lookingoverattheiPadonthebed.“Idon’tknow.IthinkIjustwanteda

reminderofyouinmybed,justincaseyourefusedtogetbackinit.”Ilaughandhewinksatme.“I

watchedyouforhoursbeforeItookit.Doyouknowyoumakelittlenoiseswhileyousleep?”

Iswallowmybiteandarchmybrowathim.“Littlenoises?Likewhat?”

“Likemoans.Tinylittlewhimpers.”

“What?NoIdon’t.”Iunscrewmybottleandtakeabigsipwhilehenodsatme.“Idonotmakeany

noiseswhenIsleep.”

Heturnsandplaceshisemptyplateonhisnightstand.Jesus,themandevourshisfoodinamatter

ofseconds.“Yesyoudo.Youevensaidmynameafewtimes.”Mymouthdropsopen.

IplacemyplatedownonthenightstandbeforeItramplehim.“NoIdidnot.Takethatback,

Carroll.”I’mpokinghimeverywhere,tryingtofindaweakticklishspotonhisbodyandhe’sonly

laughingatmeinamusement.

“Reese.OhReese.Rightthere.”

Ifeelmyfaceredden.“You’reevil.”IscoffbeforeIrolloffhimandliebackonmypillow,pulling

thecoversupovermyhead.GoodLord,Ihopehe’sjokingbecauseifheisn’t,howembarrassingis

this?

HislaughshakesthebedandIfeelthecoversslowlyslidedowntorevealhisfacehoveringover

mine.“Love.”

“What?”Itrytopullthecoversbackupbutheholdsthemdown.I’veneverbeentoldItalkinmy

sleepbeforeormakeanyweirdnoises,andI’vehadplentyofsleepoverswithJulsandJoey.Ofcourse,I

doubttheywatchmeforhoursafterIpassout.Humph.Heclimbsunderthecoverswithmeandpullsme

closetohimsothatwe’renosetonose.

“So,Ihearwe’regoingtobepairedupatthewedding.”Hishandtrailsdownmyshouldertomy

waistandholdsmethereasItrytokeepmysmileatbay.“Youokaywiththat?Itwillbelikeadateyou

know.Ratherintimate.”HislipcurlsupandIgiveintoit.

“I’mokaywiththat.Ihavebeenonafewdatesbefore.Haveyou?”

“No,wellnotinareallylongtime.”Areallylongtime?Whatclassifiesareallylongtime?Why

ishesoagainstdatingnow?Ipushthesequestionsoutofmyheadandfocusonanother.

“Haveyoualwaysbeenmonogamouslycasualwithgirls?”Thishasdefinitelybeenonmymind

recently.Ihadinitiallypeggedhimasatotalplayerwithmultiplewomenatalltimesbuthadneverdared

toask.

Hiseyesflicktominequicklybeforehedropsthem.“No.”Ireachupandrunmyhanddownhis

arm,rubbinghisshouldersthewayhelikesandseeinghiseyescloseslowly.“I’veneverreallywantedto

bebeforeyou.”Istopbreathingathisadmission.Holyshit.WasJoeyright?AmIagamechanger?My

handstillsonhisbicepandhiseyesshootopen,lockingontomine.“Youmakemewantdifferentthings,

thingsI’veneverwantedbefore.”

“Why?”Iforceoutandcontinuerubbinghisarm.Ineedtoknowtheanswertothis.Iwanttoknow

ifhisreasonsarethesameasmine.I’veexperiencedmorebeforebutnotinthewaythatIwantwith

Reese.Iwanteverythingwithhim.

Hekeepshiseyesonmeandsighssoftly.“Idon’tknow,butIcan’tstandtheideaofnotbeing

monogamouslycasualwithyou.Ihavenodesiretobewithanyoneelseandthethoughtofyouwith

anotherman,”hishandcomesflyingupthroughhishair,stoppingmymassage,“itfuckinginfuriatesme.”

Well,thatsettlesthat.Likethere’sanyothermanontheplanetthatIwanttoeverbewithnowthat

I’veexperiencedthisone.Iscootincloserandcontinueworkinghisarm,reachingaroundtowardshis

back.“Iknowthefeeling,”Ireplyashiseyescloseshutagain,hislipsquiveringintoasmile.Silence

fallsbetweenusandIletmymindwanderwhileIworkhisbackandshoulder.IfeellikeI’mmaking

progresswithReese,progressoutofthecasualzoneandtowardssomethingmoreseriouswhichIam

dyingtosprintto.ButIknowIcan’trushhimandhe’llhavetodothisathisownpaceifheevenwants

to.IfI’velearnedanythingfromthepastfewweekswithhim,it’sthathedoeseverythingathisownpace.

Helikestobeincontrol,eventhoughhetoldmethatIhaveitallwhichcompletelythrewmeforaloop.

I’mchalkingthatuptohimjustworryingaboutmysafety.Hewasobviouslyscaredformeandwhen

you’rescared,yousaycrazyshit.Helikestoshowhowmuchpowerhehasandhisauthorityover

situations,asheclearlydisplayedwhenhedestroyedmydress.SoI’lllethimcontrolthis,controlus

becauseIlikethepacehe’staking.Aslongashetakesmewithhim.

Nineteen

Aftergivinghimadecentonehandedmassageandenjoyingallofhistinylittlemoansofpleasure,

Reeseflipsonhisbackandpullsmeontopofhim.Hescootsupsothathisbackisagainsttheheadboard

andwe’rechesttochest.Allthetensioninhisfaceisgoneandtheonlythingbotheringmeanymoreismy

nowstiffhandfromhisdrawnoutrubdown.Hishandswraparoundmywaist,tighteningtheirgripandI

feelhim,hisdesireformegrowingagainstmybackside.

“Missedyourface,”Iwhisperandseehislipcurlupinthecorner.

“Justmyface?”

“Never.”Imoveinslowlyandcapturehismouthwithmine;lickingalongtheseamofhislipsuntil

heopensupforme,whichonlytakeshalfasecond.Irelishhismintyflavorandmoanintohismouth.His

tonguestrokesmineinawaythatsetsmyskinonfireandI’mdesperateforhim.Tanglingmyhandsinhis

hair,Ipullhimclosertomeandrubmychestagainsthis.Hishandsrunupmyback,ticklingalongmy

spineandgrazingaroundtowardsmyfront.I’mnotsurewhathe’sbetterat,touchingorkissing.Bothsend

meintoafrenzywhereIfeellikeI’mgoingtocombustatanymoment.Hiscallusedhandsexpertly

squeezemybreasts.“Mmm,rightthere.”Ikisshimalonghisstubblejawandtowardshisear.“Ineed

you.”

Hismouthrunsdownmybodybetweenmybreasts,kissingandlickingeveryinchofme.“Dylan,I

wanttodosomething.”

MylipspullathisearandIreleaseitenoughtoreply,“Anything.”BecauseIwoulddoanything

withthisman.It’sobvioustoeveryoneatthispoint.Ifeelhishotbreathonmychestandhehesitates,

causingmetoleanbackandbringshisfaceuptomine.“Anything,”Irepeat.Hisadam’sapplerollsinhis

neckandhislipspart.

“Iwanttomakelovetoyou.”

Igasp,completelyshockedandunpreparedforthisrequest.Iwashonestlyexpectingsomething

alongthelinesofanalplaywhichIwastotallyupforwithhim,eventhoughI’veneverdoneitbefore.

Thethoughtofanalsexterrifiedmeoncebutthis,thisrequestthathe’sjustthrownoutbetweenus?I’m

notsurethere’sanythingmoreterrifying.ButIwantto,andIcanatleasttryright?Forhim,forReese

Carroll,forthelookhe’sgivingmerightnow,yes.Icanatleasttry.

MyheartconstrictssomuchthatIreachupandplacemyhandonit,makingsureitdidn’tjustbeat

forthelasttime.Hewantstomakelovetome.Love.Notfucking.Mymindisscramblingforwords.He’s

studyingme,waitingformyresponse.IknowI’vebeensilentforatleastseveralminutesandI’msureit’s

killinghiminsidebuthe’snotshowingit.Hisfaceissoftandpleading,eyessearchingmineand

conveyingthatwecandothis.ThatIcandothis.

“Okay,”Isayfinally,andIthinkwe’rebothshockedthatIactuallyspoke.“Ijustneedtousethe

bathroomfirst.”Hegrinswide,myfavoritelinesappearingandkissesmequicklyonthelipsashelifts

meoffhim.Withoutaglanceback,Iscurryintothebathroomandclosethedoorbehindme.

Shit.I’mabouttomakelovetoamanthatI’mstrugglingtonotfallinlovewith?WhatamI

insane?

Istareatmyselfinthebathroommirrorandquicklycombmyfingersthroughmyhair.Mycheeks

areflushed,mynipplesarehard,andI’mbeyondreadyforhimbetweenmylegs.Everythingaboutmeis

readyforthisrightnow,everythingexceptforwhat’sburninginsidemychestcavity.Ican’tevenbeginto

imaginewhatmakinglovetohimconsistsof.Fuckinghimisintenseandborderlineintimateasitis.And

that’sdefinitelyallwe’vedonesofar.IfIdidn’tknowitbefore,hisrequestjustconfirmedit.Sowhat

exactlyamIinfor?HaveIeverevenmadelovebefore?IthinklongandhardaboutthatasIquicklyuse

thetoilet.No,noway.NotwithJustin.I’mnotevensurehe’scapableofmakinglovetoanyone.Hewas

alwayssodistantwhenwewerehavingsexthathebarelykepteyecontactwithme.Andmakinglove

consistsofeyecontactI’msure.Ihurriedlywashmyhandsandtrytomentallypreparemyselfforwhat’s

abouttohappenasIexitthebathroomandreturntohisbedroom.I’mhaltedinmytracks.OhGod.

I’mstoppedinthedoorwaybythesightofcandleslitandcoveringbothnightstands,providingan

amberglowthroughouttheroom.Reeseismessingwithhisphoneasheplacesitonthedockingstation

onhisdresserwhenheturnstome,seeingmyexpressionandstraighteninginstantly.“Toomuch?”

Ibitemylipandshakemyhead.It’sperfect,he’sperfect.“No,Ilikeit.”Isettleonthebed,

kneelingandrestingbackonmyheelsasIwatchhimcontinueplayingwithhisphone.He’slookingfora

songandI’malmostonehundredpercentsureIknowwhatsonghe’slookingfor.Damnit,Ineedtolook

upthoselyrics.Butthat’snotwhatstartsplayingashewalksovertowardsme.“Lookafteryou”byThe

Fraypoursthroughthespeakers.I’mfamiliarwiththissonganditslyricsthatwillsurelyripmyheartout

ifIhe’snottryingtotellmesomethingwiththisselection.“Thisisn’tclichéisit?Candlesandmusic?”he

asksasherunshishandsthroughhishairanddownhisface.

Ismileplayfullyathisnervousness.“No,there’snothingaboutyouthat’scliché.”Thisis

completelytrue.I’venevermetamanlikehimbeforeandIdoubtIeverwill.Reachingouttohim,he

slipshishandinmineandallowsmetopullhimtowardsme.“Makelovetome,handsome.”

Iseeit,thelayerofanxietydropinfrontofmeashecrawlsontothebedandpushesmeontomy

back.Settlingbetweenmylegs,hebeginskissingmeinthegentlestwaypossible.There’stongue,

becausewithhimthere’salwaysatleastsometongue,butit’sdifferent.I’musedtotherough,quick

strokesofhisagainstmine,againstmylips,butthesestrokesaremuchmoreunhurriedandtender.

Groaningsoftlyintohismouth,I’mquicklymeltingaroundhimandI’msuddenlynotsurewhatkindof

ReesekissingIprefer.HishardIwantyounowkissesareinsanelyhotbutthis,theletmemakeloveto

youkissesareradiatingthroughmybody,sparkingsomethinguntouched.Heslowlyworkshiswaydown,

kissingeverypartofmewiththesamegentlemouthIjustpersonallygotveryacquaintedwith.Thesong

beginstoplayagain.He’sputitonrepeat?Ifeelhishotbreathbetweenmylegsandarchupintohim.

“Yes,Godyes.”Thefirstlonglickcausesmetofistthesheetstightlybetweenmyfingers.Ipullmy

bottomlipintomymouthandbiteithardasheworksme.

“Lookatme,”hepleadsandIimmediatelydropmygaze,meetinghisgreeneyes.He’swatching

me,capturingmyeveryresponsetohismovementsandI’mnotholdinganythingback.Histonguelapsin

andout,aroundandbetweeneveryfoldanddip.He’sevensomehowmakingthismoreintimatewithhis

unrelentingstare.Hisstrokesaresoftbutcarrytheperfectamountofpressure.Idon’twanttocomeyetso

Iconcentrateonthelyricsofthesongtogivemeadistraction.Likethat’spossible.Theman’smouthisa

machine.

Therenow,steadylove,sofewcomeanddon'tgo

Willyouwon'tyou,betheoneI'llalwaysknow

WhenI'mlosingmycontrol,thecityspinsaround

You'retheonlyonewhoknows,youslowitdown

Damntheselyrics.

I’mnotsureabouthimbuttheyaredefinitelypushingeveryemotionalbuttonin

mybody.Hemoansagainstmeandmyeyesrollbackintomyhead,thesensationmovingthroughmelike

acurrent.HislipspullmyclitintohismouthandIcryout,unabletoholdbackanylonger.“Reese.”I’m

pantingandmovingmyhipsagainsthismouthasIcomelongandhard.Histonguelapsupeveryounceof

myarousal,slowlyandtentatively,keepingmeonthebrinkofanotherorgasm.Graduallyreleasingme,he

placessweetkissesontheinsidesofmythighsasIstaredownathim.

“Comeuphere.”

Hecrawlsupmybodyandsettlesbetweenmylegs,gazingdownatmeashepositionshimselfat

myentrance.Ifeelhim,rightthereandknowthattheslightestmovementwillplungehimintome.Buthe

doesn’tmove.HishandsholdmyfaceandIstareupathim,hearingthebeginningofthesongandsmiling.

“Ilikethissong.”

“Metoo,”hewhispers,bendingandtrailingkissestomyear.Withaslowpush,he’sinmeandI

griphisbacktightly,gaspingandclingingmyselftohim.“Fuck,”hesaysintomyearbeforeheleansup

andholdshimselfaboveme.Keepingmygaze,hebeginsmovingslowly,hishipsthrustinggentlyinto

mine.Istareathischestasittightenswitheachpush,themusclesinhisabdomenripplingwithhis

movements.He’sneverbeenthisunhurriedwithme.Thisisdifferent,waydifferentthanwhatwe’vedone

before.TheintimacyispouringstraightoutofhimintomeandIfeelhimeverywhere.Hiseyesaresoft

andwarm,penetratingmineandconveyingunspokenwordsthatIprayI’mnotmisreading.Iwanttotell

himsomanythingsinthismomentashelovinglystrokesme,inandout,butIdon’t.Iwrapmylegsaround

himandletmyselffeelit.

“Tellmeyou’veneverdonethisbefore,”Iwhisper,seeinghiseyesdilateaboveme.“Thatyou’ve

nevermadelovetoanyonebutme.”

There’snohesitationinhisreply.“Never.It’sonlyyou,Dylan.Justyou.”Igrabhisfaceandbring

hislipstomine.Ourmoansaresilencedbyeachother’smouthsandthemusicthatisplayingallaround

us.Hispantingincreasesandmyhandsaregrippedashebringsthemoneithersideofmyfaceandlaces

hisfingersthroughthem.Iloveitwhenhedoesthattomyhands.It’ssuchaboyfriendmove.Mybreathing

quickensashistongueworksagainstmine.Slowandsteadythrusts,I’mpulsingaroundhimandtryingnot

toendthistoosoon.MakinglovetothismanhasgonewayaboveanyexpectationIcouldhaveconjured.

Heincreaseshispace,thrustingdeeperandharderandI’mclose,soclosebutIwanthimtounravelwith

me.Ineeditlikeadrug.

“Comewithme,”Ibegandhedropshisforeheadtomineandgruntsloudly.I’mthereinstantlywith

thelookhegivesmeandfalloutaroundhim;tremblingagainsthimandfeelinghiswarmthrunthrough

me.

“Dylan,”hewhispersmynameinsteadofhisusualclimaticscream,pumpsintomeandstills,

collapsingdownontopofmeasIsoakhimandwhatwejustdidin.Ourbreathingisunevenandloud,his

blowingacrosstheskinofmyneckandminepushingoutaboveus.Idon’tcarethathisismakingmehot,I

don’tcarethathishipisdiggingintomineandcausingashootingpainacrossmypelvis.Idon’twantto

move.Ever.

“Thatwas…”Istarttosaybutcan’tfinishbecausetherearenowords.

“Yeah,thatwas…”Hekissesmylipsquicklybeforeslidingoffthebedandmutingthemusic.“Are

yousore?”Iflickmyeyesuptomeethisstare.Hisseriousexpressionalsocontainingabitofhesitation.

“No,I’mperfect.Thatwasperfect.”Itwasbeyondperfect.Ireachupandstretchabovemyhead,

ashecrawlsbackovertopofme,settlingonhissideandpullingmeclosetohim.

“Hi,”Iwhisper.

“Hi,yourself.”Hissweetsmilepullsathislips.

“So,tellmeallabouthowyoucalledJoeyafterIfellasleepThursdaynightandnotFriday

morning.”

Hiseyeswidenandhisgrinspreads.“Iwaswonderinghowlonghe’dkeepthatfromyou.Didhe

evenmakeittwentyfourhours?”Hishandreachesupandbrushesmyhairoutofmyface,tuckingitsoftly

behindmyear.

“Noway.OncethewinestartedflowingFridaynight,heblabbedeverything.”Ireachoutandrun

myhandalonghisjaw.“Ilikethis,alot.Youshouldgoallscruffymoreoften.”

“Soshouldyou.”Hishandbrushesbetweenmylegsandmyeyeswiden.

“What?Seriously?”Ireplythroughashockedgrin.

“No,Ilikeyoulikethis.Icanseeeverypartofyouwithoutanythinginmyway.”Iwigglemy

browsathimandhisinfectiouslaughpullsmein.“YouknowhowmuchIhateanythinggettinginmyway

whenitcomestoyou.”

“Isthatwhyyoustealmypanties?Topreventmefromputtingabarrierinbetweenus?”

Heshrugsplayfully,hislipscurlingupintoasmile.“Youwaxitright?”Inod.“Doesn’tthathurt?”

Yes.

“Nah,Willisreallygentle.”OhI’mdevious.

“Excuseme?”

Mysmilecracksthroughandhisfacereleasessomeofitstensionbutnotmuch.He’stooeasy.“He

is.He’sbeendoingmeforyears.”

I’mquicklybeingpressedintothemattressbyhistallframe.“Ihopeyou’refuckingjoking.Iamnot

okaywithaguywaxingyouthere.”MyarmsarepinnedtomysidebyhiskneesandI’mnowfacetoface

withhiserection.Whoa.He’shardagainalready?

“WhatifItoldyouhewasgay?”

“Doesn’tfuckingmatter.”Heinchesforwardandbrushesthetipagainstmymouth.

“Ohplease,areyougoingtodisciplinemebymakingmesuckyouoff?That’shardlyapunishment.”

Idartmytongueoutandlickthetip,seeinghimshudderabitashestaresdownatme.

“ItwillbeonceIwithholdyourorgasm,whichyouknowdamnwellI’mgoodatdoing.”Ohshit.

Thememoryofmyworktopflashesthroughmymind.Thatwashorrible.

“Alright!Noit’snotaguynamedWill.It’sagirlnamedLacey.”

“Really,Laceyhuh?”Irollmyeyesathissexualtone.Men.

“You’reperverted.”

“Iamandsoareyou.Now,openthatprettymouthofyoursandmakemecome.”

“Sayplease.”Anotherquickflickofmytonguepullsagroanoutofhisthroat.

“Fuckthat.Notafterwhatyoujustputmethrough.Open.”Yum.HellodominantReese.Ismileand

openmymouthasheinchesforward,grantingmefullaccesstohismember.

“Fuckyes,”hegruntsthroughgrittedteethashefucksmyface.Bringingonehanddown,heholds

thebackofmyheadandplummetsdeeplyintome,hisquickthrustscausingmyeyestowater.Iglanceup

andseehisotherhandgrippingtheheadboarduntilhisknucklesarewhite.“Sofuckinggood.”

Imoanaroundhim,mylipsvibratingagainsthisskinasheshiftshiskneeandpullsmyrightarm

out.“Wraparoundme.”Igripthebasewithmyhandandbeginslidingupanddownhislengthashestills,

keepingjustthetipofhiminmymouth.I’mglidingeasily,thesalivafrommymouthcompletelydrenching

him.Workinghimhardandfast,mytongueflicksagainsthimandmylipsteasehishead.Hepulsesinside

meandIseethetensioninhisjaw.Ilovedoingthistohimandgetjustasmuchpleasureoutofitashe

does.Droppinghisheadback,hisadam’sappleslidesandhisveinsprotrudeinhisneckashemoans

deeply.Hisownbodyisvibratingwithhissounds,movingagainstmytongue.Ikeepmyeyesonhim,

watchinghischestheavewitheachthrustandhisstomachclenchasIworkhim.Suckingandteasinghim,

myhandgripsharderandIseehisshouldershunchforward.“I’mclose,love.Don’tstop.”

“Doyouwanttocomeinmymouth?”Iask,asIlickthetip.

Hiseyeswiden.“Yes,unlessIhaveoptions?”HisvoiceisstrainedandIknowhe’sonthebrink.

“Youcouldcomeonmeifyouwant.IthinkI’dlikethat.”

Heswallowsandquicklybacksdownmybody,anglinghimselfatmybreasts.“Here?”heasksand

Inod,pumpinghimhardandseeinghislippullintohismouth.Webothstareatthespectacleofhim

comingonmybreasts,thewhitewarmthrollingbetweenmymoundsandafewdropslandingclosetomy

neck.“Holyshit.That’ssofuckinghot.”

Inodinagreementandstaredownatmyself,lettinggoofhiscockandseeinghimshiverabit.“You

markedmeagain.”Iswirlabitofitonthesoftenedredmarkonmyleftbreastandseehimwatchme,

studyingme.

“IthinkyoulikeitwhenImarkyou.”

Idipmyfingerintomymouth.“Iloveitwhenyoumarkme.”Heclimbsoffthebedanddisappears

intothehallwayasIgazedownatmystickymess.Itreallyishot,seeingwhatI’vepulledoutofhim.

Havinghimlabelmewithit.Iwonderifhe’sdonethatbefore.Nope,stopit,Dylan.Hecomesbackin

momentslaterwithasmallhandtowelandbeginswipinghimoffme.

“Thatwasamazingyouknow,”hesaysthroughasmile.

“Iknow.Iwanttomarkyounow.”

Hiseyebrowarchesashetossesthetowelontothefloor,plantingquickkissestobothmynipples.

“Doyou?Withwhat?”Myeyessearcharoundtheroomandlandonanotebookthat’ssittingonhis

dresserwithapenmarkingapageinit.Iquicklyhopoffandgrabit,scurryingbackovertothebedand

pushinghimdownontohisback.“Areyougoingtodrawonme?”

“No,notdraw.I’mgoingtowriteonyou,butwhere?”MyeyesrakealloverhisbeautifulbodyasI

suckonthepencap.“Imeanreally,yourbodyisalmosttooprettyfortattoos.Wouldyouevergetone?”

Heshrugs.“Idon’tknow.I’mnotopposedtoitentirely.Whatareyougoingtowrite?”

“Patienceprofessor.”HemuffleshislaughundermeasIdrophisarmopenandbeginwritingonthe

insideofhisbicep.Theinkisdark,adeepblueasIscrollinoverlygirlyhandwritingandsmileat

myself.

“Youseemtobeenjoyingyourself.Whyareyouputtingitthere?”

“BecauseIloveyourarmsandit’shidden.IlikethinkingthatI’mtheonlyonethatknowsit’sthere.

Justforme.”

“Yousaythatlikeit’spermanent.”

Ishrug.“IcanrewriteitdailyifIhaveto.”Iretracetheletterstodarkenthemandfeelhiseyeson

me.“Doyoustudyeverythingthewayyoustudyme?”

“No.Unfortunately,noteverythinginmylifeisasfascinatingasyouare.”

“I’matwenty-six-year-oldbakerwho’slivedinSouthSideherentirelife.Howisthat

fascinating?”

“Idon’tknow,justis.AndyoustudymejustasmuchsoIshouldaskyouthesamequestion.”

Irecapmypen.“Wellthatanswershouldbeobvious.I’mlookingforanewtaxguy.”Leaning

down,Iblowgentlyacrosshisarmanddrytheink.“There,alldone.”

Hisheadraisesandheglancesathisarm,thewordsDoIWannaKnow?printedonhiminmy

script.Hestudiesitforamoment,pullinghisbottomlipintohismouthandIwatchhislonglashesflutter

beforehiseyesflicktomine.

“Ilikeyourmark.”

“Metoo.”Ichuckthepenontothedresserandsettleinnexttohim,pullingthecoversuparoundus.

Hewrapshisarmaroundmywaistandcloseshiseyes,hisbreathingslowingdowntoasoftrhythmasI

observehim.Itdoesn’ttakelongbeforeIknowhe’ssleeping.Chestrisingandfallingslowly,eyes

flutteringasifhe’smid-dreamandlipsslightlypartedtoallowforhisbreathtoescape.Istudyhimfor

minutesandthenminutesbecomehours.I’msoridiculouslyhappyinthismomentthatwhenIbeginto

silentlycrynexttohim,Idon’tknowwhattothinkbesideswhatI’mnowwillingtoadmittomyself.That

I’mcrazyinlovewiththisman.Iloveeverythingabouthim.Fromthetiniestdetaillikethelittlelines

nexttohiseyesandtheslitthatrunsdownhisbottomlip,tothewayIcanonlyseemtobeabletotakea

fullbreathwhenhe’snearme.Ilovethewordshesaystomeandthelookhereservesonlyforme;evenif

thatlookisonethat’sapreambletoaReesestyleflipout.IlovethewayIcansensehispresenceandthe

waymyheartbeatsinmychestwhenIfinallylockeyeswithhim.Ilovehim.Justhim.AndthetearsthatI

letmyselfcryarebothofworrythathe’snotgoingtoreciprocatethesefeelingsandbecauseI’mfinally

willingtoletmyselffeelthem.SoI’llletmytearsfall,becauseI’vebeendenyingmyfeelingsforhim

sincethemomentIfellintohislapandbecauseI’masillygirlwhoisgoingtoturnintoabravewoman

tomorrowandfinallytellhimhowIfell.Fuckbeingcasual.I’msooverthatbullshit.

Twenty

IwakeupMondaymorning,myeyesflutteringopenslowlytoadjusttothesunlightpouringthrough

thewindowandInoticeimmediatelythatI’maloneandnotinmybed.Glancingoverattheclock,Inote

thetimeis9:42a.m.andrealizethathe’sprobablygonetoworkaftertryingtowakemecountlesstimes.I

reallyneedtofigureoutawaytobewokenupoutofmyslumber.Whatifweeventuallyhavekidsand

theytrytowakemeuptomakethembreakfastorsomeshitandI’mdeadtotheworld?Jesus,didIjust

sayifweeventuallyhavekids?WhenhaveIeverthoughtabouthavingchildrenbefore?Never.I’ve

neverthoughtabouthavingchildren.IpictureaminiatureReesemeanderingaroundthehouse,tryingto

keephissiblingsinlineandrakinghishandsthroughhiswildhairwhentheydon’tlisten.Igigglesilently

atthethoughtandquicklypushitoutofmymind.Crazy,Dylan.Uttercraziness.

Icrawloutofbedandduckintothebathroombrieflybeforefindingmyclothesscatteredallaround

thecouch.Thememoryoftheirquickremovalsendsashiverthroughme.Thatwasfun.Ishould

challengehisdesireformemoreoften.SlippingonmypantiesandhisUniversityofChicagoT-shirt,I

findmyphoneandquicklydialJoey,feelinglikeacompleteidiotandshittyfriendfornothavingcalled

himlastnightafterthebreakin.

“Cupcake.Whatthefuck,girlie?Canyoubelievethatpsychobrokeourwindowout?”

Iplopdownontoadiningroomchairandbeginrubbingmyhead.“Wellatleastwethinkitwas

probablyher.I’msosorryIdidn’tcallyoulastnight,mymindwasallovertheplace.”Isighheavilyas

theimageofthehoodedfigurecreepsintomymind.

“Noworries,yourcasualfuckbuddycalledmewhenhewasonhiswayovertorescueyou.I’m

surehefiguredyouhadotherthingsonyourmindthanremindingyourassistantnottoshowuptowork

today.”Igruntatthecasualfuckbuddyreferenceandspotapieceofpaperhangingofftheedgeofthe

kitchencounter.Ireachoverandgrabit,noticingmyfavoritehandwriting.

Dylan,

IhavenofuckingcluehowIeversurvivednotwakinguptoyou.Andbeforeyousayanything,yesI

didtrytowakeyouuptogoforarunwithme.Youwereadorablyoutcold,asusual.Enjoyyourdayoff.

XReese

P.S.Here’sasparekeyifyougoouttoday.Keepit.

Swoon.

“Hey,solisten,Ihavesomephonecallstomaketotheinsurancecompanyandtofindsomeoneto

putinasecuritysystemandadoorabovethestairsbutwhenI’mdone,anychanceyoucouldpickmeup

andtakemetoReese’soffice?”

“Yeah,sure.I’mprettyboredmyselfoverheresinceBilly’sgonetowork.What’sgoingonatthe

office?”

Ismile.“Ohyouknow,theusual.JustmegoingtofinallytellourfavoritenumbersguythatI’m

madlyinlovewithhim.”IhearthephonedropandJoey’sinsanelyhighpitchedscreams.

“DYLAN.OhmyfuckingGod.Yes,girl,yes.Hurryupandmakethosestupidphonecallsandthen

textmewhenyou’reready.OoohhhI’mburstingoverhere.”

“Anddon’tsayanythingtoJuls.I’dhateforhertoleakittoIanwhowouldmostlikelyblab.Ifeel

likethosementalkjustasmuchaswedosometimes.”

“Mmmmmmm.Don’tyouworry,mylipsaresealedonthisone.Takecareofyourshitandthen

let’sgettotheimportantmattersathand.”

***

IcalledtheinsurancecompanyandmadesurethatIwouldn’tberesponsibleforanyofthedamage

fromthebreakin.Theyassuredmethatthewindowwasinfactbeingrepairedduringourphonecalland

thatIwouldbeupandrunningbytomorrow.GrabbingReese’siPadoffthebed,Ilookedupthenumberto

asecuritysystemcompanyandgotanestimateonatopofthelinealarmsystemtoinstall.Usingthe

commissionfromJustin’sstupidwedding,Iwentaheadandarrangedforthementocometodayandsetit

up,thatwayitwouldalsobereadybytomorrow.Iwasn’tsurewhothehelltocallaboutgettingadoor

putin,soIdialedmyparentsandheldmybreathknowingthatIwasabouttogetahugeearfullfornot

havingcalledthemlastnight.

“OhforChrist’ssake,Dylan.Somethinghorriblecouldhavehappenedtoyou.Youcouldhavebeen

raped,murdered,JesusChrist.Ican’tbelieveyou’rejustnowcallingus.”Mymother’stiradegoesonfor

agoodtenminutesbeforeI’mabletogetawordin.

“IknowIknow.I’msorryIdidn’tcall.ButI’mfine.Nothinghappenedandwe’reprettysurewe

knowwhoitwasandthepolicearelookingforher.”Stupidredheadedbitch.

“Her?Itwasawoman?Whatkindofawomanthrowsabrickthroughastorewindow?Goodgrief

whatistheworldcomingto?”

“Justsomeex-girlfriendofReese’s,Mom.Look,everythingisfine.Thewindowisbeingrepaired

rightnowandasecuritysystemisbeinginstalledtodayaswell.Ijustneedtotalktodadaboutputtinga

doorintoseparatemylivingspacefromthebakery.”Whichreally,Ishouldhavedoneyearsago.Ijust

didn’tfeeltheneedtodosountilnow.ThatorIcouldgetaguarddog.No,thathastobeunsanitary

aroundallthosebakedgoods.

“Ex-girlfriend?Humph,awomanscornednoless.Well,atleastyou’resafeandthisfinallymakes

youputinawelloverduealarmsystem.”Sheexhalesforcefully.“Here’syourfather.Bill,goeasyonher,

she’sfine.”

“Dylan,sweetheart,you’realrightthen?”Mydad’svoiceisincrediblycalmcomparedtomy

mother’s,butthat’salwaysbeenhispersonality.Idefinitelygetmyshortfusefromthewomeninmy

family.

“Yes,Dad,I’mfine.ButIneedtogetadoorinstalledatthetopofthestairsleadingfromthe

kitchen.HowdoIgoaboutdoingthat?”HeimmediatelygoesintoDaddymodeandtellsmenottoworry

aboutit,thathewillheadtoalocalhardwarestoretodayandpurchaseadoorforme.WhenItellhimthat

IcanhandleitheshutsmeupquicklyandIlethim.Idon’tthinkthereisanythingmyfatherenjoysmore

thandoingsomethingformethatkeepsmesafe.AfterIamreassuredthatitwillbetakencareoftoday,I

hangup,textJoeytoheadonover,andhopintheshower.

IrelishinReese’sshampooandbodywash,lettingthesteamcreateacloudofhisyumminessall

aroundmeasIcleanup.I’msurprisinglynotnervousatallabouttellinghimthatIlovehim.Afterlast

night,thelovemaking,himtellingmethatImakehimwantthingshe’sneverwantedbefore,Ifeel

empoweredtodothis.Iquicklyslipintoapairofjeansandacutetopasaknockonthedoorsendsme

dashingthroughthecondo.Iflingitopenandbeamatmyassistant.

“AH!I’msooooexcited.Pleaseletmebetherewhenyoutellhim.”

“What?Noway.Thisisaprivatemoment.Youmaywaitoutside.”Islipintomyshoesandgrabmy

cellandthesparekeyReeseleftforme,slippingitontomykeyringandlockingupbehindus.“Okay,

let’sdothisshitbeforeIlosemynerve.”

**

Westoppedbythebakeryonthewaytohisoffice.Themenwhowereinchargeofreplacingthe

windowwerejustfinishingupandhadmesignafewpiecesofpaperbeforetheygaveitafinalwipe

downandleft.JoeyandIbothwatchedthesecurityguysgooverhowtoarmanddisarmthesystem,

givingusboththecodeandafewformstosignaswellbeforetheytoohittheroad.Mymomsentmea

textinformingmethatmyfatherhadpurchasedadoorwithaninsaneamountoflocksandthathewould

bestoppingbylaterontodaytoinstallit.Iwouldn’thavetostickaroundbecauseotherthanJoeyand

myself,myparentsalsohadakeytothebakery.So,afterpilingbackintothecivic,wefinishedtheshort

drivetotheWalker&Associatesbuilding.

“Hownervousareyourightnow?”heasksmeasIsitinthecarandtrytofindoutwherethefuck

allmybraveryhaddisappearedto.We’vebeenparkedoutsidethebuildingforatleasttenminutesandI

haven’tbudged.

“Uh,alot.Maybethisisabadidea?”

“Fuckthat.”Myseatbeltisunbuckledformeashereachesacrossmybodyandopensmydoor,

givingmeaquickbutgentleshoveoutofthecar.“Godoit,Dylan.Thatmanintherelovesyoufiercely.

It’swrittenalloverhisbeautifulface.ButI’mafraidyoumightbetheonetohavetosayitfirst.Damnit,I

hadmymoneyonReesebeingtheonetocrackbeforeyoudidbut,ohwell.”Iquicklyrunmyfingers

throughmyhairandgivehimaweaksmile.I’mcertainhemeanswhathesays,nodoubtasmallwager

havinggoneonbetweenhimandJuls.She’llneverlethimheartheendoflosingtothisone.

“Okay,thanks,Joey.”HewinksatmeasIclosethedoorandwalkintothebuildingandtowardsthe

backofthelobbywheretheelevatorsarelinedup.MyhandsareclenchedintofistsandI’mshakingabit,

butI’mhereandI’mfuckingdoingthis.

Steppingofftheelevatorsandontothetwelfthfloor,Iwalkstraightpastthefirstreceptionareaand

towardsReese’soffice.Ihaven’teventhoughtaboutthefactthatI’llbeseeinganewfacesittingbehind

hisreceptiondeskuntilIseeit.Anditisalotmanlier.

“Goodafternoon.HowmayIhelpyou?”Theyoungman,dressedsharplyinadarksuitgreetsme

withacrookedsmile.Hisdarkbrownhairisslickedtothesidewithsomesortofproduct.Hmm.Iliked

himalready.

“Hello.IwaswonderingifMr.Carrollisavailable.”

“Oh,actuallyheisinMr.Thomas’officerightnowwithafewmoreassociateshavinglunch.Would

youlikemetocallhim?”HereachesforhisphonebutIshootmyhanduptohalthim.

“Ohno,that’sokay.IknowwhereMr.Thomas’officeis.”

Hegivesmeawarmsmileandplacesthephonebackdown.“Wonderful.Wellgorightonand

knocksincehisreceptionistisoutatlunch.Haveaniceday.”

“Thanks,youtoo.”

Man,heischeery.

Ican’thelpbutgiggleatthefactthatReesehiredamantobehisreceptionist

insteadofawoman.IwalkquicklytowardsIan’soffice,seeingitalreadyafewinchesopenandgoto

knockwhenmyfavoritevoicehaltsme.

“She’sfuckingpsychotic.I’veneverhadagirlgothatnutsonmeafterItellherI’mdonefucking

her,”hesaysthroughapartiallyfullmouth.Themandoeslovetotalkwithhismouthful.Ismileslightly

andshakemyhead.

“Yeahwell,I’mprettysuremostwomenyoustopfuckingusuallyflipoutonyouinsomewayor

another.Butthat’sreallyfuckedupthatshetargetedDylanlikethat.”IrecognizeIan’svoiceandcrossmy

armsovermychest,leaningagainstthewallasIlistenin.“Sheobviouslyhasn’thadthepleasureof

seeingDylan’spissedoffside.Prettydumbmoveonherpart.”

AthirdvoicechimesinthatI’mnotfamiliarwith.“WhoisthisDylanchickanyway?Shehot?”

Ahhhyes,sogladIarrivedhereatthisexactmoment.Nothinglikealittleegoboosttobrightena

Monday.

Ihearchipbagsruffle.“Hotdoesn’tevenbegintodescribeher.She’sfuckingbeautiful,”Reese

answersandIbitemylip.

“HemetheratMr.Walter’sdaughter’sweddingafewweekendsago.She’sJuls’bestfriendand

onehellofabaker.SheownsDylan’sSweetToothonFayette.That’sthestorethatgotthebrickthrown

throughthewindow,”Iansaysthroughamouthful.

“Shit.So,youlikethisgirlorisshejustanotheroneofthemanywomenthatReeseCarrolldestroys

inhispath?”ThethirdvoiceasksandIbracemyself.JesusChrist,thatsoundshorrible.Although,Ican

totallyseehowitapplies.Heisaforceofnature.

Silencefillstheroom,severallongsecondsofsilence.Ihearafewthroatsclearandthenhisvoice.

“It’snotseriousifthat’swhatyou’reaskingme.YouknowIdon’tdothatshit.IlikefuckinghersoI

do.”MymouthandmyheartdropatthesametimeasIhearIan’svoicesaysomethinginresponsetohis

descriptionofoursituationbutIdon’tregisterit.Instead,Irunquicklyfortheelevatorsandsliponthe

firstonethatopens.

“OhGod.OhGod.Ohshit.”I’mgrippingthewallintheemptyelevatorasittakesmedowntothe

firstfloor,myheadspinningandmyheartnolongerwithme,havingleftitontheflooroutsideofIan’s

office.Ican’tbelievehesaidthat.Aftereverything.Afterlastnightandafterhisbirthday.I’mstilljust

someonehelikestofuck.That’sit?ThedoorsopenandIrunthroughthelobbyandtowardstheredcivic

thatisstillparkedonthecurb.Joeyisleaningagainstthepassengerdoorwithhisphoneuptohisear.My

appearancemakeshimendhiscall.

“Whathappened?”

“Takemetohisplace,now.Ineedtogetmyshit.”Myfaceiscoveredintearsandhemoves

quickly,notaskinganymorequestionsaswebothfileintohiscar.

Thedrivedoesn’ttakelongandJoeyremainssilentasIburstintothecondoandgrabmyduffle,

aimlesslythrowingmybelongingsintoitandtriplecheckingthatIdidn’tleaveanythingbehind.Because

I’mnevercomingbackheretogetit.IgrabmyitemsoutofthebathroomandbreakdownwhenIspothis

bodywash,wantingtotakeafinalwhiffofitbutmanagingtopullmyselfawayfromtheshowerbeforeI

canletthathappen.IruntohisbedroomandgrabthenotebookthatIgotthepenoutoflastnightandbring

itouttothediningroom,openinguptoablankpageandgrabbingthepen.

“Dylan,whathappened?”

MyhandsareshakingasIhoverthepenabovethepaper,notsurewhatexactlyIwanttowritefor

himtosee.There’ssomuchIwanttosay.Iwanttotellhimhowbadlyhe’sfuckedup,howmuchIlove

himandhowangryIamathimformakingmefallinlovewithhim.Becausethat’sexactlywhathedid.

HepulledthatlovethatIhadburieddowndeepinsidemerightuptothesurfaceandnowI’mdrowningin

it.IwipeundermyeyesandlookupatJoey.

“Hedoesn’tloveme.He’sjustfuckingme.Hedoesn’tdoserious.”Itakeinadeepshakybreath.

“I’mdone.”MyhandbeginstomoveashebringshisovermyshoulderandholdsmewhileIwrite.It’sa

sloppymessbutit’slegibleandIleaveitopenonthetableforhimtoread.

Reese,

Ican’tdothisanymore.I’msureyou’llhavenotroublefindingsomeonewhocangiveyouwhatyou

wantbutit’snotme.Pleaseletmego.

Dylan

Turning,IdropmyheadintoJoey’schestandcryharderthanI’veevercriedbefore.Hisarms

envelopemeandhewhispersreassuringwordsintomyearasIsob,drenchinghisnavybluepoloshirt.

“Sweetie,didhereallysaythat?”

Inod.“Yes.Hesaidhedoesn’tdoseriousandhe’sjustfuckingmebecausehelikesto.”

“Shit,Dylan,I’veseenhimwithyou.He’snotgoingtoletyougowithoutafightandyouknowit.”

Ishakeagainsthimandgriphimclosertome.“Joey,Ican’tdothiswithhim.Pleasemakesurehe

understandsthatIcan’tseehim.Ifuckingcan’t.”

Ibackawayfromhimandseehimnodweakly,mostlikelyfearingtheReesetiradethathewill

certainlybeupagainstasIgrabmykeysandremovethespareonehegaveme,placingitonthenoteIjust

scribbled.Ilookupathim.“IreallyhatetoaskthisbutwouldyouandBillymindif---”

“Fuckno.Ialreadydecidedthatyou’removinginwithusuntilthisshitblowsover.Reesewill

breakthroughthatnewwindowofyoursifheknowsyou’reupstairsinyourloft.”Igivehimhalfasmile

andpickupmyduffle,swingingitovermyshoulderasthetearsbegintofallagain.

“Comeon,cupcake.You’llbeokay.”Andwithonefinallook,IlockupbehindusandletJoey

movemybodydownthehallwayandtowardstheelevators,becauseIhavenocontrolofitmyself

anymore.

**

Afteraquickstopatthebakerytopickupsomethings,JoeytakesusbacktoBilly’scondoand

quicklypoursustwomassiveglassesofwine.HeoffersmetheguestroomwhichIplacemystuffdown

inbeforezoningoutonthecouch,staringdownatmyglass.I’mstillcryingbutnotasheavily,onlyafew

tearsstreamingdownmyfaceinbetweenblinks.Irubbedandcriedoffallmymakeupandhaven’tdared

tolookatmyselfinamirrorforfearastowhatImightsee.Myheartphysicallyaches,likeit’sslowly

beingpulledapartbysomeunseenforceandit’stakenitseverlovingtimedoingittoo.Ijustwishit

wouldspeeduptheprocessandripittoshredsalready.Afterseveralminutesalonewithmythoughts,

Joeyjoinsmeonthecouchwithaheavysigh.

“I’msofuckingconfusedrightnow.Dylan,Ireallythought,shitweallthoughtthatReesewanted

morethanjustsomecasualbullshit.”HegrabsmyhandasIkeepmyheadturneddowntowardsmyglass.

“I’msosorry,cupcake.DoyouwanttocallJuls?”

Itakeamassivesip,hopingtodullsomeofthepainbecausealcoholistheposterchildforbroken

heartsyndrome.“Iwill,althoughIprobablydon’thaveto.Oncemynoteisdiscoveredandhecan’tfind

ortalktome,he’llbecallingIanwhowillinturninformJuls.”Iswallowanothergulp.“Ifeelsostupid.

Everyonewarnedmeabouthim,youespecially.TellingmewhatallBillysaidabouthowhedoesn’tand

willneverdoarelationship.”Ishakewithmycriesandhavetoputmyglassdown,coveringmyfaceup

asitallcomesbackagain.“Ihatehim.”JoeywrapsmeupandhushesmeasIconvulseinintensesobs

againsthisbody.Thisisit.Thisiswhatbeingbrokenfeelslike.AndamanthatIwasn’tevenina

relationshipwithdidittome.Fuckinghell.

TwentyOne

Twodaysbeforethewedding.

“OhforChrist’ssake,Juls.Youneedtodecideonacakeflavornoworyou’renotgettingafucking

cake.”GoodLord.Igetthatthegirlonlycaresabouthersweethusbandtobebutshit.I’minchargeof

providingsomethingdecadentandshe’sonlygivenmethetypeofflowersshewantsonit.Julsjustlaughs

atmeassheflipsthroughmydesignbookinmykitchenbakery.

It’sbeenclosetothreemonthssinceIendedthingswithReese.Afterhecamehomeandfoundmy

note,myphonedidn’tstopringingforaweekstraight.Iignoredallofhiscallsandtexts,andIalso

ignoredeverythingJulswouldtrytotellhimabouthim.Ididn’twanttoknowhowupsethewasorhow

badhewantedtotalktomeaboutthings.ImovedbackintomyloftafteronlyspendingafewdaysatBilly

andJoey’scondo.Theywereverysweettomeandoverlyhandsonwithmyhealingprocess,butIknew

thatifIwasgoingtomovethefuckon,Ineededtodoitinmyownplace.ThetextsandcallsfromReese

stoppedafteramonthandapartofmewishedthatIhadn’tdeletedeverytextwithoutreadingitorevery

voicemailwithoutlisteningtoit.ImissedhisvoiceandIhatedmyselfforit.Imissedhiswordseven

moreandthatmademewanttopunchsomeone.ButhegotthehintandIhaven’tseenmyphonelightup

withhisnameinexactlyfifty-fourdays.Julsgotthehintalsoandstoppedbringinghimup,butIthinkthat

wasmainlybecauseherweddingwasquicklyapproachingandshehadalotofshittotakecareof.And

Ianknewbetterthantotalkabouthimaroundme.He’sbeenawitnesstosomeofmyverbalattackson

men.

I’veseenherandIanalotinthepasttwomonths,helpingthemplantheweddingthatmybestfriend

basicallyputintoherhusbandtobe’shands.He’sbeenamazing,likereallyamazingathandling

everythingexceptfortheGoddamnedcakeselection.ThathedecidedtoleaveuptoJulsandI’maboutto

hitherupsideherprettylittleheadwithmydesignbookifshedoesn’tpicksomethingoutalready.The

factthatIhavehercaketomakeisn’ttheonlythingstressingmeout.Tomorrownightistherehearsal

dinnerandIwillbestuckinthesameroomwiththemanthatbrokemeeighty-threedaysago.I’vebeen

reassuredthatwewon’tbesittinganywhereneareachotherbutthatdoesn’thelpmuch.Istillhaveto

rehearsetheceremonywithhimwhichmeansI’llbestandingdirectlyacrossfromhimuponthatstupid

altarandmyarmwillbeloopedthroughhiswhenwewalkdowntheaisle.GodIhateweddings.

“Alright,here’sthedeal,”Julssaysafterthirtyminutesofmetappingmyfingersonmyworktopat

her.“Iwantathree-tieredalmondlemoncakewithlemonfillingandacreamcheesefrosting.There,that

wasn’tsohardnowwasit?”Ohshe’sgonemad.Sheslamsthebookshutandpushesittowardsme,her

glowingbridetobesmilechippingawayatmyremainingpatience.“Now,ontomorepressingmatters,the

bacheloretteparty.Iwanttogodancing.”

IrollmyeyesandlaughasIwritedownherweddingcakeselection.Aboutdamnedtimetoo.

“Soundsgoodtome.AslongastheboozeisflowingI’mallin.Iplanonstayinghighlyintoxicatedforthe

nexttwodaysanyways.”IbeginpullingtheingredientsIneedofftheshelvestostarthercake.

“Wellyoubetternotbedrunkatthewedding.Youareinchargeofmakingsureeverythingruns

smoothlyandhowthehellareyougoingtodothatifyourheadisstuckinatoilet?”

“Ohrelax,ofcourseIwon’tbeplasteredatthewedding.Justtipsyenoughtotoleratethesituation.”

Ipulloutmymixerandsetitaside.“Wheredoyouwanttogotonightanyways?I’mgoingtohavetomeet

youtheresinceIhaveashitloadofbakingtodo.”Iglareatherattheendofmysentenceandshegives

mehergoofygrin.

“IwasthinkingClancy’ssincewehaven’tbeenthereinforever.Ohshit.Rememberthelasttime

you,me,andJoeywentthere?Didn’theenduphookingupwiththreedifferentguysinonenight?”

“Ofcourse,intrueJoeyfashion.Thatdefinitelywon’tbehappeningtonightconsideringhe’s

practicallyengagedasitis.”MyfacedropsatthefactthatI’mtheonlysinglefriendinourcircleandI

shakemyheadatmyself.Nosulking.Youdon’tneedaman.Menaredickheads.

“Dylan.”Shereachesoverandgrabsmyhandthat’sonmymixer,pullingmeclosetoherand

grippingbothofmyshoulders.Ibracemyselfforwhat’scoming.“Iknowthenexttwodaysaregoingto

behardforyou,butyou’rethestrongestwomanIknowandhavebiggerballsthananymanIknow.”Ilet

outaweaklaugh.“Ifanyonecangetthroughthis,it’syou.”ShepullsmeinforahugandIlether.Atleast

shedidn’tmentionhewhoshallnotbenamed.“He’sjustasmiserableasyouare.”Damnit.Soclose.

“Juls,don’t.”

“Wellatleasthewas.Ihaven’theardanythingforawhile.Apparentlyhe’sslammedatwork.”

“Idon’tgiveashit!”Ipushawayfromherandbeginrippingopenmybagsofflour.“He’s

miserable?Doubtit.I’msurehe’sstickinghisdickintoeverywhoreintheSouthSidezipcodeaswe

speak.”MyvoicebreaksattheendandIstruggletoholdbackmytears,butthey’vebeenonreservelately

andareneverfaraway.Herarmswraparoundmybackandshesighsheavily.

“I’msorry,sweets.I’mgonnaheadoutbutwillseeyoutonightatClancy’sright?”Inodandsniff

loudlyassheplantsaquickkissonmybackbeforesheexitstheshop.

ItakeaminutetodrymytearsbeforeIstartmixinguptheingredientsforthealmondlemoncake.

GodIcouldn’twaittostartdrinkingtonight.IfIdon’tshowuphung-overtotherehearsaltomorrow,it

willsurelybeaweddingmiracle.

**

Clancy’sispackedbutImanagetospotJoey,Juls,andBrookeproppedupataroundtablebythe

bar.Ishimmymywaythroughthecrowdandreceiveveryalcoholinducedgreetingsfromallthreeof

them.

“Dylan.Fuckyes!I’mheadingtothebar.Whatdoyouwant?”Brookeasksasshestumblesoffher

stool.“I’mgood,I’mgood.Good,”sheturnsandsaystowhoeveriswatchingher.Well,drunkenBrooke

didn’ttakelongtocomeoutandplay.

Itrytostiffenmylaugh.“Whateveryou’rehavingsoundsgood.”

“No,”JoeyandJulssaytogetherquickly.

“Oh.Uhokay,glassofPinotthen?”

BrookespinstowardsthebarasIeyeuptheothertwo.“Whydon’tIwanttodrinkwhatshe’s

having?”

“BecauseI’mprettysureshe’sdrinkingstraightjetfuel,”Joeybarksaroundhisbeer.“She’s

completelyoutofcontrolandI’minchargeofbabysittingherforsomestupidreason.”Henarrowshis

eyesatJuls.“I’mlettingitslidethisonetimesinceyou’regettingmarriedintwodays.”

“Loveyou,”sherepliesassheblowshimakiss.“Afteryougetyourdrink,Dyl,we’rehittingthe

dancefloor.”Inodandglancedownatherphonethatislightinguponthetable.

“Hey,husbandtobe.Ohjustdrinkinganddancing.Whatareyouboysdoing?Ifyousaystripclub

I’mfindingmyselfanothergroomwhileI’mhere.”Shetakesasipofherdrinkandsmilesaroundher

strawasBrookereturnsmiraculouslywithoutspillinganything.

“Hereyougo,Dylan.Bytheway,thebartenderaskedforyournumber.”IglancearoundherasJoey

whipshisheadinthesamedirection.Thebigbaldbartendersendsawinkmyway.

“Uh,nothanks.”Itakeageneroussipofmywine.

“Seriously,likehe’deverstandachancewithyou.He’smoreyourtypeisn’the,Brooke?”

“Fuckyou,Joey.You’vebeenonmyassallnight.What’syourproblem?Billyholdingoutonyou?”

“Please.Igetlaidwaymorethanyoudo.Tellme,hasyourvirginitygrownbackyet?”

“JesusChrist,Joey,”IbarkandtrynottocrackuplaughingatpoorBrooke’sexpense.Sheisn’tthe

onlypersonatthistablenotgettinglaid.Hemerelyshrugshisshouldersandglancestowardsthedance

floor.

“So,Dylan,isn’ttomorrowgoingtobeinsanelyawkwardforyou?”Iglaredirectlyatherand

suddenlywishIwouldn’thavejustcometoherdefense.BrookeWicksandalcoholdonotmixwell.She

talksalotofshitandthenendsuppassingoutorthrowingupallovertheplace.Notagoodlookfor

anybody.

Ibrushmyhairoffmyshoulders.“No,Brooke,I’mnotexpectingittobeawkwardatall.Infact,I

can’tfuckingwaittohaveareunionwithex-fling.It’snotlikethingsendedbadlybetweenusor

anything.”Myvoiceisthickwithsarcasmbutgivenhercurrentstate,sheprobablywon’tpickitup.How

muchhasshehadtodrink?

“Christ,Brooke.Don’tbesofuckingrude,”JoeysaysasJulsturnsherbackawayfromthetable

andcontinuesherphonecall.She’sinblissfulbridemodeandIdon’tblameherforavoidingthis

conversation.

“What?I’mjustsaying,IwouldfeelawkwardifIhadtoplaynicewithmyex.Youshouldjusthook

upwithsomeoneelseintheweddingparty.”

“JesusChrist,likethat’stheanswertoalltheworld’sproblems.Justhookupwithsomeoneinthe

weddingparty.Foryourinformation,theonlytwoothermenintheweddingpartyaregayormarriedand

eveniftheyweren’t,no.I’mnothookingupwithanyoneattherehearsaldinneranddefinitelynotatthe

wedding.That’showthiswholefuckedupsituationgotstartedinthefirstplace.”IglanceoveratJoey

whoisstaringatme,wide-mouthedandstunned.“Yourememberright,Joey?‘GoaheadDylan.Youknow

youwanttoslipoffintosomedarkcorneranddosomethingelseinthatlapofhis.’Thisisallyourfault.”

Hiseyebrowsraiseandheleansacrossthetabletowardsme.“Myfault?Howisthismyfault?I

didn’tpushyouintohislap.Ididn’tmakeyourunofftothebathroomwithhimandtellhimtofuckyou.

AndIsureashelldidn’tputaguntoyourheadtocontinuebeinghiscasualfuckbuddy.”Hisfingerdarts

acrossthetableandpointsdirectlyatme.“Thatwasallyou,cupcake.”

Julsspinsaroundandglaresatbothofus,phonestilluptoherear.“JesusChrist,youtwo.Keepit

downbeforewegetthrownoutofhere.”

Ireachoverandgrabhisfinger,bendingitabitashescreechesandpullsitawayfromme.“All

me?Areyoufuckingserious?Youweretheonethatsaidtobehissexylittlemistresswhenwethoughthe

wasmarried.Andyouweretheonethatkepttryingtoconvincemethatitwasmorethanjustcasualsex.

‘OhDylan,themansendsyoulovelettersandhe’ssoromantic.’Rememberthatbullshit?”Ipointright

backathimandhejerksbackinhisstool.“Don’tyoudaretellmeyoudidn’thaveapartinthis.Ihadyou

yappinginmyearalldayabouthowwhatweweredoingmeantmoretobothofuswhenclearly,itonly

meantmoretome.”Islammyhanddownonthetableandgrabmydrink,downingitquickly.Mysparing

partner’sfacesoftensandheshakeshishead.

“Fuck,Dylan.You’reright.”Hethrowshishandsupintheairdramatically.“You’reright.I’m

sorry.Ireallyhatefightingwithyou.Youscaretheshitoutofme.”WebothburstoutlaughingandIfeela

pairofeyesonmeasIturnquicklytoBrookewholooksconfused.

“Youtwoarefuckingweird.AndIdon’tcareiftheothertwogroomsmenaregay,married,or

prefemaletomaletransformation;I’mgettinglaidbysomeone.”

“Bitch,youbetterstaythehellawayfromBilly,”Joeysayssternly.Julsquicklyspinsaroundand

allargumentscometoahaltatthesightofherbeamingface.Weallregainourcomposureandshe’snone

thewiser.

“Okay,baby,Iloveyoutoo.Havefun.”Shehangsupherphoneandhopsoffherstool.“Alright,

bitches,Ibelieveit’stimeformetoshowyoursorryassesuponthedancefloor.”Shedoesaquickspin

andherblackdressfansoutaroundherknees.

“Ha!”IyellplayfullyasIgetdownandrunovertoher,puttingherhandinmine.AclumsyBrooke

followswhileJoeyquicklydownshisbeer.

“Let’sdothis!”heyells.

Wedancedallnightintotheearlymorninghours,finallyleavingClancy’sat2:00a.m.andallpiling

intothesamecab.Noneofusdrovewhichwasagoodthingbecauseweareallrightlysmashedandin

zeroconditiontodoanythingbutgotobed.We’regigglinglikeidiotsinthebackseatofthecab,throwing

outouraddressesandconfusingthehelloutofthedriver.

“Christ,already.WhoamItakinghomefirst?Ican’tunderstandfourdirectionsatonce,”thedriver

yellsbackasweallfallintoafitoftearfulchuckles.

“Brooke,ohmyfuckingGod.ThatguyyouweredancingwithlookedlikeMr.T.”Ilaughandshe

searchesherbrainfortheimage.“Heevenhadallthegoldchains.”

“Buthecouldmove.Whew.”

“Yeahhecould.I’mprettysurehehadbettermovesthanmewhichsaysawholefuckinglot,”Joey

addsasJulswipesthetearsunderhereyes.

Thedriverspinsaroundtofaceus.“Ladies.Oh,andgentleman,sorry.WherethehellamIgoing?”

“I’mclosest.Dylan’sSweetToothonFayetteplease.”IfallbackagainstJoey.“Ohman,thiswas

sofun.Juls,seriously,thanksforthis.”

Shewinksatmeaswepullawayfromtheclub.“Sofun.Iloveyouthree.ANDI’MGETTING

MARRIEDTOMORROW!”Wealllaughandcheeraswedriveoffdowntheroad,thepettyargumentsof

thenightleftbehindalongwithBrooke’svomitthatcameshortlyafterwestartedoutontothedancefloor.

Icalleditthough.Thegirlshouldreallynotbearoundhardliquor.

I’mdroppedoffamerefifteenminuteslaterandsaymyquickgoodbyesbeforeIstumbleinsideand

lockupbehindme.Afterpeelingoutofmydressandremovingmymakeup,Iopenmydresserdrawerand

spottheUniversityofChicagoT-shirtthatIhadstuffedintomydufflebagwhenIwaspackingupmystuff

thedayIendedthingswithReese.IshouldhavesentitbacktohimthroughIanwhenIrealizedthatItook

it,butapartofme,apartofmethatnobodyknowsabout,likeswearingittobedsomenightswhenIwant

tosmellhim.Idon’twearitoftenforfearthatmyscentwilloverpowerhis.ButIdodecideonwearingit

tonight.Islipitonandclimbintobed,grabbingmyphoneandopeningupmyinternetsearch.

Whileonthedancefloortonight,theArcticMonkeyssongpumpedthroughthespeakersandIlet

myselfdancetoit,notwantingtogiveawayhowbadlyitkilledmetohearit.AndasImovedmybodyto

it,IrememberedthatIneverlookedupthelyricsandit’sbeenonmymindtheentireevening.Sonowin

theprivacyofmydarkbedroom,I’mfinallylookingupthelyricstothesongthatremindedhimofme.

“OhGod.”Ireadthelyricsagain,andagain,lettingthemsinkintomeandcursingmyselfforeven

lookingthemupinthefirstplaceandforthestupidclubforplayingthisstupidsong.“Fuck.”Ishutdown

myphoneandrollover,buryingmyheadintothepillowtosoftenthecriesthatarecomingfrommenow.

Jesus,thatsong?Really?It’sasongaboutwantingtobewithsomeonesobadly,thinkingaboutthem

allthetime,wantingmorewiththem.Dreamingaboutthem.Thatsong?Howcouldthatsongremind

meofhim?IburymyfaceintohisT-shirtandcryharder,tryingtopushthelyricsoutofmyheadtogive

myselfsomerelief.Iinhalehisscent,thescentthatisslowlyfadingandIfinallycalmmyselfdown

enoughtofallasleep.AndsleepIamdefinitelygoingtoneedifI’mgoingtosurvivethenextforty-eight

hours.

TwentyTwo

Iwakeupalittleafter11:00a.m.onFridayandpreparemyselfforthedayahead.Idecidetogoon

arunbymyselftoday,onlywantingmyownthoughtstooccupymyheadandnotJoey’srelentlessrantings.

Aftermyfivemiles,IlockupshopandheadupstairstoshowerandgetdressedtofinishJulsandIan’s

weddingcake.TheshopisclosedandwillbeuntilMondaysincewe’vehadherweddingtopreparefor

andI’mgratefulforthequiet.Isliponmyapronandwhipupthecreamcheeseicingthatsherequested,

admiringthesugareddahliasthatIalreadycreatedtocascadedownthecake.Icursemyselfforthinking

ofReeseatthesightofthemandwhipfaster.Damnit.Whatguypaysattentiontodetailslikethat?I’d

putmoneyonIannotgivingtwoshitsabouttheflowersthattookmehourstocreate.

Aftericingthecakeandcleaningupmymess,Iglanceatthetimeontheoven.Its3:30p.m.andI

needtobeatthechurchinanhouranddefinitelyneedanothershower.Iuntiemyapronandthrowiton

theworktopbeforeIdartupthestairs.I’vepickedablacksleevelessdressandpumpstoweartonight,

pinninghalfofmyhairupandleavingtherestinloosewavesdownmyback.Mymakeuplookselegant

butnottoodoneupandIsmileweaklyintothemirrorasIgazeatmyreflection.Mydressishangingoff

mybodymorethanitusedtoandIknowthat’sbecauseIhaven’tbeeneatingmuch.Besidesmydailytaste

tests,I’mhavingtochokedownmymealsthatJoeyhasbeenbringingme,oratleastpartsofmymeals.

ButatleastIameating.Afteronelastlook,IgrabmyclutchandheadtowardsthenightI’vebeen

dreading.

St.Stephen’schurchwasIan’spick,aswasthereceptionandmostlyeveryotherdetailforthat

matter.IparkalongthesideofthebeautifulbuildingandstraightenmydressoutasImakemywaytothe

frontsteps.Stoppingatthebottomandglancingupatthedoubledoors,mynerveshitmeinonehardrush

andIwanttoturnrightaroundandgetbackintothecomfortofSam,butIcan’t.Iclosemyeyesandgrip

thehandrail.“Comeon,Dylan.”Ipickupmyfeetandmoveupthestairs,clearingmythroatbeforeI

openoneofthedoors.

Thechurchisbeautiful,withdarkwoodfurnishingsandstainedglasswindowsallowingthe

sunlighttoshinethroughinalldifferentcolors.Evenifyouaren’treligious,trysteppingintoacatholic

churchandnotfeelingthepresenceofsomethingwaythehellbiggerthanyou.Iglanceupatthemassive

cathedralceilingandadmirethepaintedmuralswhenIhearJulsscreechingmyname.

“Thereyouare.NowifBrookewouldjusthurrythehellupwecangetstarted.”She’satmyside

instantlyandlooksbeautiful.Dressedinadeepplumdressandherhairpulledupsleekly,she’s

practicallyglowing.Sheleansinandhugsmeasmyeyesglanceuptowardsthebodiesatthefrontofthe

church.Butofcourse,Ididn’tneedtolooktoknowthatheisherealready.IfelthimthemomentIstepped

insidethisstupidbuilding.MyeyesfindhisinstantlyashestandswithIanandtheothermen.Hislipspart

slightlyandIwatchhischestrisewithadeepintakeofbreath.BeforeIcanrakemyeyesdownhisbody,I

pullbackfromJulsandbreakthecontact.

“Youlookbeautifulandreadytobemarried.”

“Thanks.Youdon’tlooksobadyourself.Comeon,myparentshavebeenaskingwhenyou’dget

here.”ShegrabsmyhandandpullsmeupfrontasIkeepmyeyesfixedonanyonebuthis.Luckily,we

stopafewpewsshortofthemenwherealltheparentsarecongregating.

“Dylan,thereyouare.Wowyoulookstunning,dear.How’sthebakerybusinessgoing?”Mrs.Wicks

wrapsmeupinahug.Shewasalwayslikeasecondmothertome.

“It’sgreatandthankyou.Youlookamazingyourself.Andhowareyoudoing,Mr.Wicks?Readyto

giveyouroldestdaughteraway?”

HepullsmeintohisarmsandI’mimmediatelyhitwiththesmellofcigars.“Fatchance.She’ll

nevergetridofheroldman.It’sgoodtoseeyou,Dylan.”

“Youtoo.”Atthatmoment,thefrontdoorsswingopenandBrookecomesbarrelingthrough,looking

likeshejustwokeupandmostlikelyfeelingalotworse.IhearJulsgaspbehindme.“Excuseme,”Isay

politelybeforeIbeginquicklymakingmywaydowntheaisletowardsaverystupidlookingbridesmaid.

“Dylan.Rememberthatguylastnight?”Igrabherwristandpullherbehindapillarasshetriesto

getoutofmygrasp.“Jeez.What’sthebigdeal?”

“Whatthefuck?Areyoustilldrunk?”IaskasJoeycomesrushinguptouswithJulsonhisheels.I

noticequicklythatalltalkinghasstoppedatthefrontofthechurchandcanfeelamillionpairsofeyeson

us.

“NoI’mnotdrunk.I’mjusthung-over.OoohhhwhichoneisReese?”Igripherharderandshe

yelps.

“OhforChrist’ssake.Waytokeepitclassy,Brooke,”Joeywhispersharshlyasthepreacherwalks

overtowardsus.Weallstraightenupafewinches.

“Arewereadytobegin,Miss.Wicks?”heasksandshesmilesquicklyandnods,glancingbackat

mewithherpanickyeyes.

“We’reready,”Iconfirm,keepingmyhandonBrooke’sarmasweallfollowthepreachertowards

thefront.Iglareoveratherandshecowersbesidemeaswewalkuptothefront.“Pullyourshittogether.

Andifyouactlikethistomorrow,Iwillpersonallymakesureyoudon’tgetlaid.Iwillvaginablockthe

shitoutofyou.”HermouthdropsopenandIhearJoeylaughbehindus.

“What?Youbetterstaythehellawayfrommyvagina,”shegruntsandmygriptightens.

“Ha!Ibetyou’veneverutteredthosewordsbefore,Brooke.”Joeylaughs.

WestopasthepreacherturnsandfaceseveryoneandIquicklyglanceupandovertomyright,

findingReese’seyesonmeandquicklydroppingmystarebackdown.IletgoofBrookeandshesighsin

relief,massagingherreddenedarm.

“Okayeveryone,we’regoingtodoaquickrunthroughoftheceremony,justtomakesureeveryone

knowstheirplaces.So,ifIcanhavethegroomsmen,bestman,andthegroomallstandingtomyleftright

here,”hemotionsdownatthestairsbelowhim.“Andladies,andgentleman,ifyouwouldlineupatthe

frontdoorsandwe’llgetstarted.”Ohgood.I’llonlyhavetowalkwithReeseattheendoftheceremony

downtheaisle.That’snottoobad.Whatisit?Twenty-five,thirtyfeetofcontact?Icanhandlethat.We

quicklyformalineatthebackoftheroomasIstandinfrontofJuls,Joeyinfrontofme,andBrooke

hopefullyleadingtheway.Godhelpherifshecan’tmakeituptothealtar.

“Youreadyforthis?”Joeyleansbackandwhispers.

“Yup.You?”

“Ohplease,haveyouseenmybabyupthere?Gorgeous.”Igiggleathisresponseandhearthe

preacherannounceforBrooketostartwalking,whichshedoesafterJoeygivesherarightshove.

“Asshole.She’sgoingtobesuchapaintomorrow,”hesaysbeforehebeginswalkingandIcan’thelpbut

smile.Myassistantasabridesmaid.Ofcourse.

“Iloveyou,”JulssaysbehindmeandIfeelmyeyeswaterabit.

“Loveyou,”IsayasIbeginmakingmywalkuptheaisle.Idon’twantto,Ireallydon’twanttobut

myeyesfindhisimmediatelyandIfinallygetmyfirstreallookathimineighty-fourdays.He’swearinga

blacksuit,perfectlytailoredtothatbodywithagreenstripedtieandwhitedressshirt.Hishairlookslike

it’sbeencutabitbutstillhasitsperfectlytousledlooktoitandhiseyesarepiercingintomine,thegreen

beamingoutofthemthankstohistiecolorchoice.Iseethemquicklydropandrundownmydressbefore

heflicksbackuptomeetmine,jawsetandtense.Itakemyspotonthesamestepashimandfinallylook

awaytowardsJulswhoiswithherfatheratthebackofthechurch.ShebeginsherwalkupandIkeepmy

eyesonhereventhoughIcanfeelhimlookingatme.Studyingme.

Thepreacherrunsthroughtheceremony,goingoverthevowsthatIanandJuls’pickedoutfor

tomorrow.IsmileandlaughastheyrecitethemandkeepturningaroundtomakesureBrookeisstill

uprightandawake.JoeygivesmeareassuringwinkwitheachturnandIknowhe’sgothercovered.

ThankGod.Afterthemockexchangingoftheringsandpronouncementoftheirmarriage,thetwoofthem

beginfilingdowntheaisleandIquicklyclampmyeyesshut,knowingwhat’scomingnext.Shit.He’s

goingtotouchme.He’sgoingtotouchmeandI’mgoingtoloseit.

“Ok,nowDylanandReese,youmaywalkdowntogether.BillyandJoey,youcanfollowwhenthey

areabouthalfwaydowntherows.”Iopenmyeyesandstepforwardafterthepreacherfinishesandsee

Reesealreadywaitingforme,elbowoutsothatIcaneasilyslipmyhandthroughit.Iswallowloudlyand

griptheinsideofhiselbowaswebeginwalkingsilentlydowntheaisle.Icanhearhisbreathing,slow

andsteadyasifhe’sunaffectedbythisentirely.Figures.Iwasn’tsurewhatIwasexpectinghere.The

sightofmecausinghimtofaintpossibly?Butno,notevenunevennervousbreathing.

“Youlookbeautiful,”hesays,lowandthroatyandIgaspslightlybutdon’trespond.Wereachthe

endoftheaisleandIquicklydropmyhandfromhisarmandmovetostandnexttoJulsandasfaraway

fromhimaspossible.Shit.Don’tbeaffectedbythat,Dylan.Aftertherestoftheweddingpartycomes

downtheaisle,weallsayourmomentarygoodbyesaswefileouttowardsourvehicles.Iquicklywalkto

Samandscramblein,wantingtoavoidanyalonetimewithReeseasIseehimwalkingoutwithIanand

theothermen.HiseyesfallonmydeliveryvanfleetinglybeforehehopsinhisRangeRoverandpulls

awayfromthechurch.Idropmyheadonthewheel.“Okay.Halfofthenightisover.Now,youjustneed

togetthroughthedinnerandyou’llonlyhavetoworryabouttomorrow.”Aftermylittlepeptalk,Istartup

SamandmakemywaytowardsCasaMia’s.

TherehearsaldinnerisbookedataquaintItalianrestaurantandalongrectangulartablehasbeen

setasideforusintheveryback.MyplaceisnexttoJulsandthreeseatsdownfromReesewhoissitting

nexttoIan.I’mimmenselygratefulthatheisn’tseatedontheoppositesidebecauseI’vedoneenough

lookingforoneevening.Joeyplopsdownnexttomeandlet’soutanexhaustivesigh.

“Problemswithourfavoritebridesmaid?”Iask,noticingthatshehasn’tgraceduswithher

presenceatthetableyet.Ipickupmywaterandtakeafewsips.

“I’mgoingtokillher.Sheinsistedonridingwithmeandthentriedtofeelmeupinthecar.”Water

shootsoutofmymouthandcoversthethankfullyemptyplacesettingacrossfrommeasIquicklybringa

napkinuptomyface.

“Jesus,Dylan.Areyouallright?”JulsasksasIcontinuecoughing.Iglanceoveratherandseethat

everyoneisstaringatme,andImeaneveryoneasIquicklyshakeoffmychokefest.

IturnquicklytowardsJoey.“Areyouserious?”

“DoIlookserious?IfeellikeI’vebeenmolested.Shealmostmademecauseanaccidenton

highwayeleven.”

MycoughingturnsintogigglingasIleanmyheadontohisshoulderandwebothcrackupatthe

situation.“OhmyGod.That’samazing.Isoneededtohearthatrightnow.”Ilaughoutasheshakeshis

headatme,pickinguphiswater.

“What’sgoingon?”Julsaskssoftlyasourdinnerisbroughtouttous.I’msuddenlystarvingandthe

dishthat’sinfrontofmeisabouttobedestroyed.

Ieyeherupmischievously.“YourlovelysisterhasbeenputtingthemovesonJoJo.”Herfork

drops.

“What?Ohgreat.That’sjustgreat.”Oncue,Brookeappearsandquicklyclaimsherseatnextto

Joeywhostiffensnexttome.Julsleansacrossandsnapsherfingersathersister.“You’reanasshole.”

“Yeah,I’msorryJoey.Thatwasabitembarrassing.Although,wasitjustmeordidsomething

move?”ShegigglesandorderssomethingalcoholicfromthewaiterthatJoeyquicklycancelsforher.

“Didsomethingmove?Areyoufuckinginsane?Andnoboozeforyou.Icanonlyimaginewhat

wouldhappenifyoustarteddrinking.”

Ishakemyheadandtakeabiteofmychickenpicatta,moaningaroundmyforkasafamiliarface

movestowardsourtableandstandsacrossfromme.

“Hey,Dylan.How’sitgoing?”Juls’cousinTonyeyesmeupandIquicklysmileandwaveathim

frommyseat.We’veknowneachotherforyearsandgowayback,butneveranythingmorethan

friendship.

“Hey,Tony.Howareyou?”

“I’mgreat.Getyoursweetassoutofthatchairandcomegivemeahug.”Ilaughandscrambleout

ofmyseat,walkingdownthesideofthetablethatdoesnotcontainmyex-flingandgetquicklyliftedinto

theair.“Youlookgood,girl,”hesaysintomyhairashegivesmehisusualbearhug.

“Thanks.Jesus,putmedownalready.”HesetsmeonmyfeetandIshakemyheadathim,

straighteningouthistie.“So,what’snewintheworldofcomputerprogramming?”Myeyesquicklyflick

towardsReesewhoisstaringatmewithdaggers.Ohplease.Likeyouhaveanyrightanymore.

“Nailedit.Nicememory.It’sgood.Howaboutyou?Julstoldmesomethingaboutyourbakery

gettingbrokenintoorsomeshitafewmonthsback?That’sfuckedup.”

“Yeahwellitsfinenow.Theycaughtthepsychothatdiditandtherewasn’tanypermanent

damage.”Heatherwasapprehendedbythepoliceafewweeksafterthebreakin.Herprintsmatchedthe

onesonthebrickandsheadmittedtoeverything,gettingchargedwithbreakingandenteringandalso

gettingmovedoutofthecitybyherparents.JulshadrelayedtheinformationfromIanwhenhefoundout

aboutit.

“So,anymaninyourlifeorhaveIfinallycaughtupwithyouwhenyou’resingle?”Ismilesweetly

atTonybutshakemyhead.Heisdefinitelynotmytypeandevenifhewas,Ihavenointerestindating

anybodyrightnow.Especiallywhenthemanthatbrokemeissittingnomorethantenfeetawayfromme,

continuallystaringatmyprofile.

“Ohplease,likeyoucouldevenhandleme,”Iplayfullyrespondandhenodsinagreement.“Itwas

goodtoseeyou.I’llcatchupwithyoulater,okay?”Iturntogobackaroundthetablebutseeamajorpile

upofbodiesattheendIwanttowalkdownandgruntasIhavetomakemywaytowardstheotherend.I

walkbehindTrentandBilly’schairs,givingthembothsmilesasIquicklypushpastReese’sandfeelhis

handgripmyelbow,haltingmetohisside.

“Whatthefuckwasthat?”hegrowlsupatme.

Isnatchmyarmoutofhishandandscowlbackdownathim.“Whatthefuckwaswhat?”

“Youknowwhat.Areyouseriouslygoingtoblatantlyflirtinfrontofme?Isthathowthisshitis

goingtoplayout?”Isheserious?IaminnomoodforanyReesestyletiradeandthisisdefinitelynot

theplaceforit.

Ibendlowertogetmyfaceniceandclosetohisandseehimbackupabit.“Youthinkthatwas

flirting?I’veknownTonyfortenyears;he’slikeabrothertome.ButifIdidwanttoflirtwithhim,it

wouldn’tbeanyofyourGoddamnedbusinessnowwouldit?”MytoneisclippedandI’mfuming,feeling

Ianmovequicklyoutofhisseat.

“Okay.Wow,thatdidn’ttakelong.Umm,Dylan,whydon’tyougoovertoyourseat,andReese,just

calmthefuckdown,man.”IanushersmepastJuls.Iquicklypulloutmychairandplantmyselfdowninit,

glaringoverinhisdirectionasReesenarrowshiseyesatme.

“Jesus,whatthehellwasthat?”JulsasksasJoeyleansin.

“Actually,I’msurpriseditdidn’thappensooner.Ihadmoneyonyoukickinghiminthenutsatthe

church,”headds.Iwavemyhandsatbothofthemtobackthemoffme.

“Nothing.HeaccusedmeofflirtingwithTony.Fuckingprick,”Isaythroughclenchedteeth.Iwas

definitelynotflirtingwithhim.I’veneverseenTonyasanythingotherthananacquaintance,eventhough

he’saskedmeoutmoretimesthanIcancount.MyeyesglancedownthetableandIseeIanleaninginand

talkingtoatenselookingReese.Ugh.Stupidmen.

“YouandTony?That’sfuckinghilarious,”Julssaysandcontinuescuttingupherchicken.“Andeven

ifyouwere,hehasnorighttoactlikethat.”

“Iknow,”Iagreeloudlyandgetquicklyshushed.“Actingallholierthanthou.I’msurehewaiteda

wholefivesecondsbeforehethrewanothergirlintohisbedafterIleftit.”Ishoveapieceofchickenin

mymouthandstartchewingasBrookeleansacrossJoey’slap.

“Iheardhimtellyouthatyoulookedbeautiful.Thatwasreallysweet,”shewhispersandearns

herselftheevileyefromallthreeofus.

“Shutup,Brooke,”weallsayinunisonaswecontinueeatingourmeals.Idon’tlookdownthe

tableagainfortherestofthenightandkeepmyconversationswithanyoneotherthanJulsandJoeytoa

minimum.ThiseveninghasbeenexhaustingandI’memotionallydrainedandunsurehowthehellI’m

goingtohandletomorrow.I’mreassuredthatI’llonlyreallyhavetodealwithReeseduringtheceremony

andthatoncewe’reatthereception,IcanstayasfarawayfromhimasI’dlike.Butit’sthemerefactthat

we’llonceagainbeataweddingtogether,wherethiswholefuckedupsituationstartedthatisgoingto

havemeinknots.IneedtofocusonmakingsurethateverythingrunssmoothlyforJulssothat’swhatI’ll

do.It’smyjobashermaidofhonoranditwillkeepmymindoffunwantedmemoriesoffallingintolaps

andbathroomsexromps.Speakingofbathrooms,Iplanonavoidingtheonestomorrowatallcosts.

TwentyThree

JulsandIan’sbigdayhasfinallyarrivedandmiraculously,everythingisrunningsmoothly.Igotup

earlyanddeliveredthecakewithJoeytothereceptionhallbeforeweheadedovertothebridalsuite

whereweareallcurrentlygettingready.Julsisglowing,Joeyisroutinelysneakingouttogetapeekatthe

menwhoaredressingattheotherendofthechurchandBrookeiscompletelysoberandhasherwits

abouther.Afterslippingintomystunningchocolatebrownfloorlengthstraplessdress,IhelpJulsinto

hersalongwithhermother.

“Oh,sweetheart.Thisdress,”Mrs.Wickssays,tearsfillingherfreshlypaintedeyesasItrytohold

mineback.MymakeupislookingpristineandfabulousandIhavenodesiretoruinitwithunwanted

tears.Wefinishbuttoningherupandstepback.She’sstunning,absolutelygorgeousinherweddinggown

andIbitemyliptoholdmyemotionsin.

“Damn,Juls.IhavemoneyonIanlosinghismindwhenheseesyouattheendoftheaisle,”Brooke

saysasshesmooth’southerdress.Joeycomesbustlingbackintothesuiteanddropshisjawonthefloor.

“Holyfuck.Youlookamazing.”

“Joseph!You’reinachurch,”Mrs.Wickssternlyinformshim,bothhandsflyinguptoherhips.

“Easyonthelanguagetodayplease.Andthatgoesforallfourofyou.Especiallyyou,Dylan.”Sheflicks

herdaggersatme.

“Me?Please,I’msuchalady.”IshrugandcatchawinkfromJulsinthemirrorasthesuitedoor

swingsopenagain,thistimerevealingaveryhandsomeandslightlynervouslookingMr.Wicks.

“Ohmy.Darling,youlooksobeautiful.”HemovesandstandsinfrontofJuls,grabbingbothofher

handsinhisandpullingheroffherstool.“That’sit,weddingsoff.You’retooprettyforthatman.”

“Daddy,”shesaysthroughahugesmileandhesoftensinfrontofher.Imoveuptothemirrorand

takeagoodlookatmyselfastheyexchangeaprivatefather-daughtermoment,Joeyjoiningmeatmyside.

Myhairispinnedupintoaneleganttwist;afewpiecespulledoutandtuckedbehindmyearsthatare

adornedwiththeamberstudearringsJulsgifteduswiththismorning.Mymakeupissophisticatedbut

subtle,alightdustingofroselipglossthatI’msomehowmanagingtopulloffwithoutlookinglikeI

belongonastreetcorner,andmydressisperfect,huggingmeacrossmychestandshowingaclassy

amountofcleavageifthereeverwassuchathing.IfeelJoey’shandonmylowerback.

“Lookatus.Wealmostlooktoogoodforthiswedding.I’mafraidwemightjustupstagethebride,”

hewhispersaswebothglanceoveratJulswhoishuggingherfather.

“Notachance,”Isayandhenodsinagreement.Mr.Wicksbacksawayfromhisdaughterandturns

towardsallofus.

“It’stimepeople.Let’smovethisalongbeforeIlockmydaughterinthisroomandrefusetoletIan

haveher.”Weallgiggleathiscomment,hearingthehintofseriousnessinhistoneaswefileoutofthe

bridalsuiteanddownthebackstaircasethatleadstowardsahiddenareawherewe’resupposedtoline

up.Ihaven’tseentheinsideofthechurchsincewearrivedherehoursagoandI’mabitnervousatthe

numberofpeopleinattendancewhowillbewatchingmewalkuptheaisle.Myheelsareinsanelyhigh,

darkbrownslingbacksthatI’vescuffedthebottomsoftopreventanymajorslipup.ButI’mstillnervous

aboutwalkinginthem.Karmacouldeasilygivemearightshoveinthebackandsendmefallingflaton

myfacegiventheamountofhateshe’sshownmelately.Allthisanimosity.Andforwhat?BecauseIfell

inlovewithamanthatonlycaredaboutfuckingme?NiceKarma.Waytostickwithyourfellow

woman.

Welineupinorderbehindthedoublemahoganydoorsandwaitpatientlyforthemtoopen,thesoft

soundofviolinsstreamingthroughtheair.AnotherdecisiononIan’spart.Themanapparentlyloves

classicalmusic.Iclutchmybeautifulbouquetinmyhands,gratefultohavesomethingtoholdontoasthe

doorsslowlyopeninfrontofBrooke.MyviewisblockedentirelybyJoey’smassiveframebutIfeel

him,Ialwaysfeelhim.AndIknowthatassoonasIstartwalking,myeyesaregoingtolockontohisand

I’mgoingtogiveintoit.Whatever.IjusthaveonemoredaytoendureandthenIcangobacktomyshitty

life.IturnaroundandspotJulswhoissmilingatme,eyesgleamingandhandtightlyloopedthroughher

father’sarm.IgiveheraquickwinkbeforeIturnslowlyandstepforward,seeingJoeymakehisway

towardsthemiddlepews.It’snowmycuetostartwalking,butIcan’t.Myeyeshavelockedontothe

mostglorioussightI’veeverseenandhe’sstanding,waitingformeatthefrontofthealtarinatux.Holy

fuckingshit.

IknowI’msupposedtobemoving;I’vewalkedupthisaislebefore.Ijustaccomplishedthefeat

lastnight.ButI’mstuck.Mytwofeetwon’tbudgeaninchandIhearthemuffledvoicesofpeoplearound

mewonderingwhatthehellisgoingon.Joeyisupatthefront,motioningformetostartmovingand

Brookeistryingdesperatelynottocrackuplaughing.Meanwhile,Reeseisstaringatme,eyesburning

intomineandI’mmeltingonthespot.I’veneverseenhimlookthishandsomebeforeandI’msuddenly

regrettingeverything.Thebreakup,thefactthatIagreedtobeapartofthiswedding,theshirtIkept.

Everything.IforceoutashakybreathandglancequicklybackatJulswhoistryingtoremaincalmbut

comingapartslowly.HerfatherisstaringatmeandlooksunsurewhattodoasIclutchmybouquettightly

andshutmyeyes.JesusChrist,Dylan.Youneedtomove.Juststartwalkingandyou’llbeupthere

beforeyouknowit.Ishakemyheadandopenmyeyes,andifIwasunabletobreathebeforeIclosed

them,I’vecompletelyforgottenhowtoworkmylungsnow.Reeseismakinghiswaydowntheaisle

towardsme,purposeineachstepandeyesgluedonmineaseveryonewatcheshimandwhohe’swalking

towards.MylipspartandIshiftonmyfeetashereachesmyside,grabbingmyhandandloopingit

throughhisarm.Andwithoutsayingaword,hebeginswalkingmeuptheaisle,earningafewsoundsof

amusementfromthecrowdandsmilingpolitelyatthem.I’mdepositedonmystepandhedropsmyhand,

leavinganemptinessinsidemeashereturnstohisplaceacrossfromme.OureyesmeetbrieflyandI

smileweaklyathim,seeinghislipcurlupslightlyastheweddingmarchsongbeginstoplay.

Therestoftheceremonyplaysoutthewayit’ssupposedto.Ringsandvowsareexchanged,andI

keepmyeyesonthebrideandgroomwhohaven’tbrokencontactsinceJulshurriedlyreachedIanatthe

frontofthealtar.Imanagetoonlyshedafewtearsbutquicklywipethemawaybeforemymakeupis

affected.AndasthepreacherannouncestothecongregationJuls’officialtitleasMrs.IanThomas,they

kissandeveryonestandsandcheers.Ianshowersherwithaffectionastheybegintheirwalktowardsthe

backofthechurchandImovetostandnexttoReesewhoisalreadywaitingandwatchingme.Always

watching.Wefollowthebrideandgroomtothedoors,notexchanginganywordsthistime,eventhoughI

wantedtoatleastthankhimforwhathedidearlier.I’mnotsureIwouldhavemadeituptomyplaceon

thealtarhadhenotcomeandgottenme.Iquicklyreleasemyhandfromhisarmwhenwereachthebride

andgroomandwrapJulsupintoamassivehug.

“You’remarried,”Isqueal.JoeyandBrookecomescurryingupbehindusandwraptheirarms

aroundmeandJuls.

“Iknow.Andnow,wegettogoparrttaaayyy.”Ireleaseherwithagiggleandturnaround,walking

overtoIanandgivinghimabighug.

“YouhurtherandI’llcutyouupintotinypiecesandburyyouthroughoutthecity.”Heliftsmeup

andspinsmearound,amuffledlaughescapinghislips.Trent,Billy,andReeseareallwatchingandIhear

laughscomingfromthemaftermydeclaration.

Hesetsmedowngently.“Ohdon’tIknowit.I’mwellawareofyourcapabilities,Dylan.Even

thoughyousometimesmanagetoforgethowtowalk.”HesmirksatmeandIrollmyeyes.Idon’tlinger

withhimsinceReeseisathisside,chattingitupwiththeothergroomsmen.AndafterIanandJulswalk

downthechurchstepsthroughacloudoftinybubbles,weallpileintoastretchlimoandheadover

towardsthereceptionhall.

**

Thehallisbeautiful,immaculatelydeckedoutinfallcolorsandeverythingtoJuls’liking.It’salso

massiveandprobablyclosetothesizeoftheWhitmoreMansionwhichpullsatmyheartstringsabit.But

it’ssomehowclassierbecauseifJuliannaThomasisanything,it’sclassy.I’mdoingmybesttokeepsome

distancebetweenReeseandmyselfasweallstandcrampedinsideasmallroom,waitingforthegueststo

maketheirwayintothehallsothatwecanallbeintroducedtogether.Andthatpart,IfeariswhatI’ve

beendreadingthemost.ReeseandIwillbepubliclyannouncedtogetherasbestmanandmaidofhonorin

frontofeveryoneandwe’llhavetomakeourwaythroughthecrowdandontothedancefloor,alleyeson

us.Thisjustmightkillme.

“Alright,everyone,lineup.TheDJisabouttomakeyourintroductionssopairupwithyourperson

andlet’sgetthispartystarted,”thechipperolderwomanthathadusheredusintotheroomsays.Imumble

acurseundermybreathaswemakeourwaytowardsthedoubledoors,takingmyplacebehindBillyand

Joeywhoareallovereachother.

“Youtwomakewewanttovomit,”IsayasReesestepsupbesideme,grabbingmyattention

immediately.Hisscentisintoxicating,andIalmoststumbleasitfillstheairaroundme.Ishakemyhead

quicklyandregroup.

“Don’thate,Dylan.It’snotagoodlookonyou,”Billysaysthroughateasingsmile.

“Andwhythefuckcan’tyoubesingle?Damnit,Trent,”BrookegruntsaheadofusandIbuckle

overingiggles.She’sbeenhittingonpoorTrentallnightandhehasn’tpaidheranymind.It’sreally

perfectconsideringthewayshe’sbehavedthepastseveraldays.“Ugh.Reese,switchwithTrent.”She

turnsbacktowardsusandmybodystiffens,butReesedoesn’treactatall.BillyandJoeymakewideeyes

atme.

“Brooke,turnyourfuckingassaroundrightnowbeforeIcutyou,”IgrowlatherandfeelReese’s

jacketshakeagainstmyarmashetriestomufflehislaughs.BillyandJoeycrackupinfrontofmeand

Trentshakeshisheadinamusement.

“God,I’vemissedyou.”Thevoicenexttomemakesmegocompletelyrigid,asdoBillyandJoey

whoturnaroundquickly.“Oh,um,sorryIdidn’t…fuck.”MyeyesmeethisbrieflyandbeforeIcaneven

thinkofareactiontothat,thedoorsswingopenandtheDJbeginsannouncingtheweddingparty.Brooke

andTrent,followedbyJoeyandBillyaresentthroughasReeseandImoveupandheslipsmyhand

throughhisarm.Mybreathingisirregular,I’mnervousashell,andhecansenseit.“Dylan,relax.I’vegot

you.”IopenmymouthtotellhimtostopgettingmewhentheDJcomesthroughthespeakersystem.

“Andnowpleasegiveawarmwelcometoourlovelymaidofhonor,DylanSparksandher

handsomeescort,thebestman,ReeseCarroll.”

CheersandwhistlesfilltheroomasI’mpracticallydraggedbehindReese.Wepassatableof

womenwhohootandhollerathimandhegivesthemhisperfectsmileaswewalktowardsthedance

floor.“JesusChrist,”Imutterundermybreathatthemandfeelhissoftlaughshakeagainstmybody.We

standnexttoJoeyandBillyandwatchasIanandJulsareannounced,myhandremovedfromhisarmto

allowmetoclapalongwiththecrowdofpeopleastheywalkjoyouslyintothehall.Theystopinthe

centerofthedancefloorandbegintheirfirstdanceashusbandandwife.Theweddingpartymovesabout,

talkingamongstthemselvesandIglanceoverandseeReesemakehiswaytowardsatablewhereadark

headedwomanissitting,hereyesbeamingathim.Shestandsandpracticallyhurlsherselfupintohis

armsandhewrapsherup,plantingkissesintoherhairandIimmediatelyturnaway.Shit.Areyouserious

rightnow?Hebroughtafuckingdate?ThesoundofthesongisblurredoutaroundmeasImove

towardsJoeyandyankhimawayfromBilly,pullinghimtowardstheoppositeendofthedancefloor.

“Jesus,what?”heasksasIfinallyletgoofhisjacket.I’mshakingandheeyesupmyappearance,

hishandcominguptograbmybareshoulder.“What’swrong?”

“Hebroughtadate.Afuckingdate,Joey.Iwasnotexpectingthat.”Mychestisrisingandfalling

rapidlyandIfeellikeImightjustpassoutrighthereinthemiddleofthisthing.Iseehiseyessearch

acrossthedancefloorandspotReese,whoistalkingcloselywiththeyoungandveryattractivewoman.

“Fuck.That’ssonotcool.Wantmetosaysomething?Icanthrowhisassoutofhere.Orhersifyou

want.”

“Ohplease,likeyouwouldstandachanceagainstReese.Buther,maybe.”Henarrowshiseyesat

meandmakesaface.“Fuck,thisisawful.He’salloverher.IfiguredBrookewouldbetheonlybitchI’d

befightingtoday.”Thesoftsongdiesdownandeveryoneistoldtotaketheirseatssothatthemealcanbe

served.ImakeanobscenegestureinthedirectionofReesewhoisnonethewiserasIwalkuptothe

bridalpartytableandtakemyseatnexttoJuls.

I’mquietduringthemeal,myonlywordstoJulsbeingthatI’msohappyforherandthatshelooks

radiant.IpickatthefoodonmyplateandkeepfindingmyselfglancingoveratthetablethatReesehad

beenhoveringoverduringthefirstdance.Thewomanisyoung,probablyclosetomyageandhasdark

browncurlyhairthatfallsjustabovehershoulders.She’stalkingamongsttheotherguestsathertableand

havingablast,whilemymindiseyeingupmyutensilsanddecidingwhichweaponofchoiceI’dliketo

useonherifIgetthechance.Butreally,isitherfaultthatheaskedherhereashisdate?Sheprobably

doesn’tknowaboutme,letalonethehistoryweshare.She’saninnocentbystanderthathe’sdraggedinto

thismesslikeacompletefuckingasshole.I’mgrippingmyknifetightlyinmyfistandfeelJoeypryitout

ofmygrasp,quicklyputtingitfarawayfromme.

“Relaxplease.I’dreallyrathernothavethecopscalledatJuls’weddingreception,”hesaysunder

hisbreathasIletoutaforcefulone.TheDJsoftensthemusicandtalksthroughthespeakersasItryand

calmdown.

“AndnowIwillaskthattheweddingpartymaketheirwayoutontothedancefloorforaspecial

number.”

“Ohgreat.Givememyknifeback,”IgrowlatJoeyasweallstandupandheshovesitfartherdown

thetable.Hegrabsmywaistanddirectsmedownthestairs,therestoftheweddingpartymeetingusout

onthedancefloorandfinallylettinggoofmewhenheplantsmedirectlyinfrontofReese.Icrossmy

armsovermychestandrefusetolookupandintohiseyes.Bastard.Ihearasmallsoundofamusement

fromabovemeashestepsintomeandpriesthemdown;wrappinghishandaroundmybackwhilehis

otherholdsmineagainsthischest.AsongthatgutsmebeginsplayingoverheadandIflickmyeyesupto

hisandseehissoftsmile.OfallsongstheDJcouldhavepickedforthisstupidmoment,hepicks“Look

afterYou?”Perfect.

“Whatthefuckisthis?Didyouaskforhimtoplaythissong?”IaskangrilyasItrytowigglefree.

Hisgriparoundmetightens.

“SowhatifIdid?Itdoesn’tmeananythingtoyouanywaysowhat’stheproblem?”

“Ohyou’resoright,Reese.Itmeansnothingtome.You’reafuckingassholeyouknowthat?Ican’t

believeyoubroughtadatetothisthingandhadthenervetoaccusemeofflirtingwithJuls’cousin.”I

glareupathimashemovesmearoundthedancefloor,myangerlevelrisingattherealizationthathe’s

alsogoodatslowdancing.Reallyfuckinggoodatit.

“Whatdate?Whatthefuckareyoutalkingabout?”

Itiltmyheadtowardsthedirectionoftheprettybrunettewhoisstaringatus,smilingforsome

weirdassreason.“Thatdate.Isawyouwithher.Kissingherandtalkingallcloseandintimate.Fuckyou.

Iwouldneverdothatinfrontofyou.”

Heshakeshisheadatme.“Thatismyfuckingsister,Dylan.Ianinvitedherandherhusbandwho

couldn’tmakeitbecausehe’sawayonbusinessandIhaven’tseenherformonths.That’swhyshegot

suchawarmwelcomingfromme.Butitdoesn’treallyfuckingmatterifit’smysisterornotnowdoesit?

Youendedthings,remember?Youfuckingdestroyedme.”

Ipushawayfromhimandtakeastepback.Staring,shockedathisadmission.“Idestroyedyou?

Fuckyou.Youcompletelybrokemeyoustupidshit.”Islaphimhardacrossthefacebecauseit’swhatI

doandstormoffthedancefloor,pushingmywaythroughthecrowdofpeoplethat,I’msure,havebeen

focusedonussinceourheatedargumentstarted.I’moutthedoubledoorsandmakemywaydownthe

longemptyhallway,unsureofwhereI’mheadedwhenIhearthedoorsswingopeninthedistancebehind

me.

“Dylan!”

Ikeepmoving,pickingupmypacebutstumbleforwardoncemyheelcatchesonmydress,landing

hardonmyknees,myhandsbreakingmyfallandhittingthemarblefloor.Fallingbackontomyheels,I

dropmyheadintomyhandsandtrytomufflemycries.Ididn’twanthimtoseemelikethisbutit’stoo

late.HisbodydropsdownandI’mliftedoffthefloorandontomyfeetashetriestopullmeagainsthis

chest.Ipushawayandpryhishandsoffmywaist.

“Letgoofme.Ihateyou.Ifuckinghatewhatyoudidtome.”Iwipeundermyeyesandmentally

cursemyselfforthemascarathatappearsonmyfingertips.

Hiseyeswiden.“WhatdidIdo?Dylan,Goddamnit.WhatthefuckdidIdobesideseverythingyou

wanted?”

“EverythingIwanted?HowwaswhatwedidwhatIwanted?You’retheonethatwantedacasual

hookup.You’retheonethatneverdidanythingseriousandonlywantedittobeaboutsex.Ineverwanted

that.”

HestepscloserandIbackupbutI’mpressedagainstthewall,unabletoputanymoredistance

betweenus.“Whatthefuckareyoutalkingabout?”Hiseyessearchmyfaceforanexplanation.“Youwere

theonethatsaidthiswasjustfunandnothingserious.YoulabeleditthatwhenwewereatTheTavern

thatnight.Youweretheonethatrefusedtoletmegetclosetoyou,neverwantingthingstogettoointimate

betweenus.Thatwasallyou,Dylan.Ifuckingtoldyouthatyouhadallthecontrol.”Heroughlyrakeshis

handsthroughhishairanddownhisface.“Thisshitwasnevercasualforme.Never.You’veownedme

sincethatfuckingwedding.”

“IfuckingheardyouwithIan.IcametoyourofficethedayIendedthingstotellyouthatIlovedyou

andIfuckingheardyou.Yousaidyoudidn’tdoseriousandthatyouwerejustfuckingmebecauseyou

likedto.Howcouldyousaythataboutme?Aftereverything.Afteryourbirthdayand---,”myfacefalls

apartintearsandIpushagainsthischest,“---andafteryoumadelovetome.Howcouldyousaythat?”

Hishandsgripmineandholdthemtohischest,hiseyeswideningandpupilsdilating.“That’swhy

youendedthings?Fuck,loveifyouwouldhavejuststayedandlistened.”

Ipullmyhandsawayfromhis.“Don’tcallmethat.Andlistenedtowhat?IheardeverythingI

neededtohear.Imeantnothingtoyouandyoumeanteverythingtome.”

Heshakeshisheadandgrabsmebythewaist,pullingmeagainsthimsoourchestsaretouching.He

sighsheavily.“Christ,Dylan,ifyouwouldhavejuststayedandlistenedforafewmoreseconds,you

wouldhaveheardIancallmeoutonmybullshit.”Hishandcomesupandhepushesmyhairbehindmy

ears,histhumblingeringonmycheek.“IonlysaidthosethingsbecauseI’dbeendesperatelytryingto

convincemyselfthatitwasonlyaboutsexbetweenus,becauseIknewthatwaswhatyouwanted.Iwas

certainthatwaswhatyouwantedandtheonlywayIcouldhaveyou.Butitwasneverjustaboutsex.Not

forme.AfterIancalledmeout,IadmittedhowcrazyIwasforyou.Howyouweretheonlywomanthat

evergottomeandthatdrovemecompletelyinsane,andnotjustbecauseyouliketochallengeme.Which

youdosofuckingwell.”

MybreathingbecomeslaboredasIstandpressedagainsthim,unabletomoveorblink.Hiseyesare

burningintomineandhishandsarenowsoftlysqueezingmyhips.Iopenmymouthtospeakbuthe

silencesmewithhiswords.

“IwassoinlovewithyouandIcouldn’tadmitit,becauseadmittingitmeantdraggingyououtof

yourcasualfuckingcomfortzoneandintoitwithme.AndIwasscaredyouwouldpullaway.Andyou

pulledawayfrommeanywaywithoutmeevergettingthechancetosayit.”

I’mshakingagainsthimanddon’tknowwhattosayorifIcanevenspeakanymore.He’sadmitted

everythingI’veeverwantedtohearandIcanonlystareupathimthroughatearstainedface.

“Icalledyou,everydayandsentyoumessages.Begging,pleadingforananswerfromyouandyou

ignoredme.”HishandcomesupandstrokesmycheekandIleanintoit.“Why?Whywouldn’tyoutalkto

me?Wecouldhavefixedthis,butnow…”

Myeyeswideninpanicashedropshishandandshakeshishead.I’mfrozenagainstthewall,

unabletomoveashisbodyturnsandhebeginswalkingbacktowardsthereceptionhall.No.Helovesme.

AndIlovehim.Thisshitcan’tendlikethis.Fuckthat.

“Seriously?”Iyellandhehalts,hishandonthedoorandhisfacedroppeddownsothatIcan’tsee

hisexpression.Imarchovertohimandriphishandoffthedoorknob,pullinghimawayfromit,and

slamminghisbackagainstthewall.“You’rereallygoingtoleaveitlikethat?Yousaidyoulovedme,do

younotanymore?”Myrapidbreathingfillstheairbetweenusashegazesdownatme,clenchedjawand

furrowedbrow.Buthedoesn’tspeak.

Igriphistuxjacketwithbothhandsandstareupintohissofteyes.Fuckthis.He’shere,I’mhere,

andI’msayingit.“Iloveyou.Iwantyou,Reese.Justyou,andnotatallinthestupidcasualbullshitway.

Iwanteverything.Sleepoversandsexinbeds.Allkindsofbeds.Yours,mine,whoever’s.Iwantto

introduceyoutomyparentsandIwanttobakeyourbirthdaycakeeveryyearwhileyousitandlookatme

thewayonlyyoulookatme.”Itakeinashakybreathwhilehestands,watchingme,studyingme.“It

fuckingkilledmetopullawayfromyou.”

Istepinclosetohimandburymyfaceintohisneck,notknowingorcaringifthisisappropriate.I

needtobehererightnowandashisarmsslowlywraparoundmeandpullmeclosetohim,Ifinally

exhale.

Hemoanssoftly,hishandstrokingmyhairasIfeelhislipscurlupagainstmyforehead.“Youknow,

thisshitcouldhavebeenavoidedentirelyifyouwouldhavejuststormedinandslappedthepissoutof

meafteryouoverheardthatbullshit.”Ipullmyheadbackandseehisperfectsmilegleamingdownatme

andItightlywrapmyarmsaroundhisback.“Imeanreally,theonetimeIwouldactuallywantyoutoslap

me,youdon’t.IwouldhavescoopedyouuprightthenandtoldyouhowmuchIlovedyou.Wherethehell

wasmyhotheadedgirlthatday?”

Ishakemyheadatthememory.“Brokenonthefloor.You’rerightthough,thatwasvery

uncharacteristicofme.”

Heplantsseveralkissestomyforehead.“Well,I’vebeenamiserablepieceofshitwithoutyou.

Apparentlyunbearabletobearound,ifyouaskIan.Howhaveyoubeen,love?”

Ilaugh,myfirstreallaughinmonthsandwipeundermyeyes.“Bitchyandmorehostilethanusual.

PoorJoey,hereallyhastakenthegruntofourbreakup.”

“Thatsoundsaboutright.Now,youhavetwooptionshere.”Ismilebigathiswords.

“TheybetterbothinvolveyourhandsandmouthonmeorI’mfindingmyselfanothergroomsman.”

HeissuesmeawarningstareandIsmirk.“Obviously.I’vegoneeighty-fivedayswithouttouching

youandit’stakeneveryounceofstrengthinmybodytonotripyourightoutofthisdress,whichyoulook

absolutelybeautifulinbytheway.”HeplantsaquickkisstomylipsasIbackupandwaitformyoptions.

“Optionone,wecangobackinsideandyoucanletmedancewithyousomemoreandenjoyyour

companythatIhavegreatlymissedoverthepastgruelingmonths,hopefullywitnessyougettingintoit

withBrookeagainbecausethatshitwasfuckinghilarious.”Ilaughathimashepushesofffromthewall

andgrabsmyfacebetweenhishands,histhumbslowlytracingmybottomlip.Thepullbetweenusis

strongerthaneverandI’mabouttosayfuckoptiononewithoutevenhearingmyotherchoice.ButIlet

himgiveittomeanyway.“Or,wecangooffsomewhereandIcanfuckyouuntilyouscreammynamein

thatsexywaythatyoudo.Allthroatyandraspy.”HistonguesweepsacrossmylipsandIpullhimin,

firmlystrokingmineagainsthis.Imoansoftlyintohismouth,tastingandrelishinginhisflavor.“Christ,

I’msoinlovewithyou,Dylan.Insanelyinlove.DoyouhaveanyideahowmuchI’vemissedyourface?”

Hisfingerslowlytrailsovermylipsandalongmyjawwhilehestudiesme.

Ileaninandplantquickkissesonhislips.“Justmyface?”Myhandrunsdownthefrontofhimand

cupshislengthandhiseyeswiden.

“Optiontwothen?Thankfuck,becauseifyouwouldhavepickedoneIwouldhavetakenyouin

frontofeveryoneonthatdancefloorandnotgivenashitaboutwhowatchedus.”HebendsdownandI’m

quicklyhauledupontohisshoulder.I’missuedafirmslaponmybacksideashetakesmedownthe

hallway.Isquealandlaughagainsthim,admiringmyownviewofhisperfectbehind.I’mquicklyslid

downhisfrontaswestandjustoutsidethemen’sbathroom,hisbrowarchedatmeashishandgripsthe

handle.

“Itisratherfitting,pickingupwherethiswholethingbegan.”Heopensthedoorandpeersinsideas

Ijumparoundonmyheels.

“Wellhopefullythistimeyouwon’tgetallweirdonmeafterwards.I’msureyou’reusedtosex

withmebynow.”I’mpulledintotherestroomandthedoorislockedbehindmeasI’mliftedoffmyfeet,

legsfirmlywrappingaroundhiswaist.

“OhIdon’tknow,love,youalwayssurpriseme.Fuck,Idon’teverwanttoleavethisbathroom.

Anyissuewithnotreturningtothereception?”HismouthlatchesontomineandI’mquicklysilenced,my

answernotworthadamnanywaywhenIcanbekissedlikethis.Themancankissbetterthananyone,

I’msureofit.I’mpressedagainstthewall,mybarebackstingingonthecoldtileashistongueroams

freelyinsidemymouth.Helicksalongmylips,pullingmytongueintohismouthandsoftlysuckingonit

beforehereleasesitandmovesdownmyneck.

“I’vemissedyou,”Isayashismouthkissesandsucksonthetopofmybreasts,hishandsgripping

myassandhikingupmydress.“OhGod,I’msowetforyou.”Hegrowlsagainstmychestashishand

slidesupbetweenus,runningupmyinnerthighandmeetingthefabricofmypanties.

“Shit.IneedtotasteyoubeforeIfuckyou.I’mdyinghere.”I’mcarriedovertoasmallleather

benchthat’sontheoppositesideoftherestroomandlaidoutonit,mydressquicklyhikeduptorevealmy

whitelacypantiesandmatchinggarter.“Holyfuck,”hesaysashedropsdowntohiskneesandmoves

betweenmylegs.Thebathroomdoorrattleswithsomeone’sknocking.“Goaway!”heyellsandIlaughat

hiscompletelyflusteredstate.Hetucksmypantiesintohispocketwithasmirkbeforehedelivershisfirst

lick.“Damn,I’vemissedthis.Sosweet.”Hehumsagainstme,movinghisfacerapidlybetweenmy

thighs.

“OH!”Icryout,myhandsgrippinghishairandholdinghimbetweenmylegsashedevoursmelike

I’mhislastmeal.Histongueisalloverme,hismovementsrangingfromquickflickstomyclittoslow

savorylapsofmylength.I’mnotholdinginmymoans,myvoiceisechoingthroughoutthebathroom,butI

don’tcare.Iwanteveryonetohearme.Ilovethismanandhismouthandeverythinghedoeswithit.He

teasesmyclitandsucksonitslowly,pullingitintohismouthasheslipstwofingersinsideofme.Iarch

intohim.

“Ifuckinglovethispussy.Tellmeit’smine,Dylan.”

“It’syours.OhGod,Reese,I’msoclose.”Hisfingersmoveinandoutofme,thepacequickening

asmyhandstangleinhishairandIpullithard.Mybackarchesofftheleatherashegrabsmyhips,his

tonguerollinginmyfavoriterhythm.I’mwhispering,pleadingwithhimtolickme,harder,deeper,right

thereandhegrabsmyorgasmthat’shistocommandandpullsitoutofme.

Icomeandscreamhisname,overandoveruntilmyvoiceisstrainedandmythroataches.Hetakes

histimesuckingupallofmyarousal,lingeringonmyclitthewayIlikeasItrembleagainsthim.Thetight

griphehasonmyhipsisslowlylessenedasheplantsthesoftest,gentlestReesekisstomypussy.My

breathingslowsandIcovermyeyeswithmyarmashestandsonhisfeet.

“Wellthen,thatdidn’ttakelong.Howhaveyourorgasmsbeenwithoutme?”Hissmugvoicemakes

megiggleandIgazeupathim,hairstickingouteverywhichwayashelickshislips.

“Whatorgasms?”Ireplyandquicklygetupandswitchspotswithhim,pushinghimontohisback

andmakingquickworkofhisbelt.“I’mgoingtofuckyousohard,you’renotgoingtobeabletowalkout

ofhere.”Hesmileswickedlyatme,thelinesthatI’vemissedsomuchappearingoneithersideofhis

eyes.“Thatokaywithyou?”

HispantsarequicklypusheddownalongwithhisboxersandImarvelathiserection.Now,thatI

definitelymissed.“Finewithme,love.”HishandsgripmywaistasIstraddlehim,reachingundermy

dressandpositioninghimselfbelowme,Ilockeyeswithhim,waitingtolowermyselfdown.

“Iloveyou,”Isayashishandspulldownmytopandrevealmybreasts.

“Iloveyou,”hereplieswithouthesitation,hiseyesflickingupfrommychestandholdingmystare.

Iquicklycrashdown,pullingathroatygruntoutofhisthroat.

“Fuck.Dylan.”OhGod.This.Iforgothowperfecthefeelsinme.Thewaymybodyformsaround

him,moldstohimlikehe’smadeforme.Justme.Ican’tmoveyet,I’mtoocaughtupinthewayhefeels

justlikethisandthelookshe’sgivingme.Greeneyesburningintominewiththatintensity,hisintensity

thatI’vemissedsomuch.He’slookingatmethewayonlyhelooksatme,thewayIonlyeverwanttobe

lookedatbythemanthatI’vechosen.Ichosehim.

IpullmylipintomymouthasIrockagainsthim,slidingupanddownhislength.Hishipsmove

beneathmeashishandsfirmlycupmybreasts.Hemoans,gruntsandgrowlsasImoveandIknowhe’s

notholdinganythingback.He’slettingeveryoneknowwhatI’mdoingtohimasmyhandsgriphisjacket.

Ican’tstopstaringathim.ThewayhisheadfallsbackwhenIslideoutofhimandthewayhisneckrolls

whenItakehimin.Histensejawandslightlyswollenlipswithmyfavoriteslitrunningdownthemiddle.

Thewayhisbodylooksinhistux,broad,built,andfuckingpowerful.Christ,hasanyoneeverlooked

thisgoodinatuxbefore?Doubtit.Seriously,it’sridiculous.Oursoundsfilltheroomandit’sthehottest

thingI’veeverheard.I’msoaked,completelydrenchedfromhisexpertmouthandthesheersightofhim.I

feelhimtenseundermeasIslidehimallthewayoutbeforeIslowlymovebackdown.Iknowheloves

that,thefeelofenteringmeoverandoveragain.Archingintohimandthrowingmyheadback,Igriphis

thighsandbegintomovefast,thenfaster.

“Justlikethat,love.ChristI’mnotgoingtolastlong.You’resofuckinggood.”Hesitsupand

wrapshisarmsaroundmyback,pullingmychesttohisfaceandlatchingontomyleftnipple.

“Reese.”Hesucksithard,flickingitwithhistonguebeforereleasingitandmovingbesideitto

wherehismarkhascompletelyfadedoffme.HismouthsucksthetenderskinthereandImoanagainst

him,myhandsgrabbinghisheadandpullinghimclosertome.“Ihatethattheyfaded.Icriedfordays

whenIcouldn’tseethemanymore.”Hemovestomyotherbreastandgivesmyothernippleequal

attentionbeforefresheningupthemarknexttothatoneasIrockslowly.Stronghandsgripmybackand

movedowntomyhips,movingmeatthespeedhewantsandneeds.OureyesarelockedandIlethim

controlmebecauseI’vemisseditandheneedsit.Myorgasmisn’tfar,thefamiliarpullbuildingbetween

mylegsandslowlyspreadingoutineverydirection.

“Yoursdidn’tfadeonme.It’sstillthere,”hesaysasIdropmyforeheadtohis,ourbreathwarming

eachother’sfaces.Mymarkonhim?Whatmark?Thewriting?Hisbottomlipgetspulledintohismouth

andIknowhe’sclose.

“Howcoulditnotfade?Haveyougonewithoutshoweringforthreemonths?”Heslowsdownmy

movements,lettingmeglidealonghislengthandlingerwhereIwant.Ishudderagainsthimatthespeed

change,feelinghimrubmethewayonlyhedoes.

“DoIsmelllikeIhaven’tshoweredinthreemonths?”Hishandscomebetweenusandhebegins

unbuttoninghistuxjacket,pullingitoffwhileIbalancemyselfonmyknees.I’manxious,giddyashellto

seehisnakedbodyandwatchinamazementashequicklymakesworkofhisdressshirt.

“No,yousmellamazinglikeyoualwaysdo.”Ileanforwardanddropmyheadintohisneckand

feelhimlaugh.Iinhaledeeplyashisshirtisremovedandmyeyesgotohisrightarmwheremy

handwritingisvisibleindarkblueink.

“Whatthe,yougotittattooed?”Myfingersrunoverthewordsthatclearlywon’truboffashe

studiesme.Alwayswatchingme.“Holyshit.That’ssohot.”Ileaninandtrailkissesoverthewords,my

wordsthatIwroteonhimashelovinglystrokesmyarm.“OhmyGod.Ilovethatyoudidthat.”Mymouth

makesitswayuphisshouldertothecurveofhisneck.Grabbinghisfacewithbothhands,Ikissandlick

uptohisfaceandlatchontohismouth,pullinghisbottomlipandsuckingonit.HegroansloudlyasI

slowlyreleaseit.

“Itookashowerthedayyou,”heshakeshisheadatthememory,“anditwasstartingtowashaway

eventhoughItriedtoavoidanysoapgettingonit.Iwassofuckingpissedthatitwasfading;likeitwas

pullingawayfrommetoo.Christ,Iwasmad.Iwentoutthenextdayandgotitmadepermanent.”He

tattooedhimselfwithareminderofme.“Ilovethatit’sinyourhandwritingandthatyouputitthere.Just

foryou.”HiseyesstudymineasIblinkrapidly,sendingtearsdownmyface.Hequicklyreachesupand

wipesthemaway,andIbendforwardandkisshimsweetly.

“Justforme,”Iechoandpushhimbackdownonhisbackandstartmovingagain.Hishandsgrip

myhipsandpullmeupanddown,quickeningmypaceasIroamoverhisbarechest.Trailingoverevery

inchofexposedskin,myhandsbecomereacquaintedwiththefeelofhim,hismuscles,andhissoftness,

justhim.Irundownhisshoulders,hisarms,hischest,andlingeronhisstomachthatclenchesasIride

him.Hisgazeislockedonmybreasts,drivingmetobringmyhandsupandtouchmyself.Moldingthem,I

watchhiseyeswidenasIplaywithandpinchmynipples.

“Fuckyes.That’ssosexy,love.”HishipscomeuptomeetmeandIdropmyeyesdown,locking

ontohis.Harderandfaster,Ifeelhimmovingthroughmeandpullingmyorgasmtothesurfaceashis

thumbspressintomyhipbones.Itellhimtopressharder,tobruisemebecauseIwanthismarksonme,

alloverme.MyhandsdroptohischestandIpantagainsthim,feelinghimpulseagainstmywalls.“Come

forme,Dylan.”Iobey,quicklycomingapartovertopofhimandrockingmyhipstopullouthisorgasm.

Idroopforwardandsprawloutontohisbarechest,feelinghisarmswraparoundmeaswegasp

againsteachother.“Ilovesluttyweddingsexwithyou,”Iforceoutthroughmyraggedbreath,feelinghis

bodyshakeslightly.

“Samehere.Weshouldreallymakeahabitofthis.”

Weletourselvesstaylikethatforseveralminutes,holdingeachotherandcomingdownslowly

beforeReesesetsmetothesideandgrabssometoiletpapertocleanmeupwith.Afterresituating

ourselvesinthemirrorandmakingoutagainstthedoorforseveraltotallyworthitminutes,hereachesup

andunlocksit,allowingforamadrushofyoungboystocomeintothebathroom.

“Uhoh,”onesaysthroughacrookedgrinasReesequicklybrushespasthim,myhandinhiswithhis

fingerslacedthroughminethewayIlove.Totalboyfriendmove.Westopatthedoorleadingtothe

receptionandheturnstowardsme,bringingmyhanduptohislipsforaquickkiss.

“Youreadyforthis,Sparks?You’reofficiallyminenowandIplanonbeingveryintimatewithyou,

andoften.Lotsofsexinbedsandsleepovers.”Hesmilesbehindmyhandquicklybeforehisfaceturns

serious.“Butjustsoyouknow,whenIsayyou’remine,Ifuckingmeanit.Iwillpersonallyremove

anyoneandanythingthatstandsinmywayofyou.Includingyourpanties.”

MygrinburststhroughmyfaceandhelaughswithmeasIplacemyhandonthedoorknobwithhim.

“Please,Carroll,bringontheintimacybecauseI’mnottakingyouanyotherway.Andjustsoyouknow,”

myeyesnarrowinonhisandIspyhiswickedgrinbehindmyhand,“YouaremineandIwilldismember

anychickthatlooksatyoutwice.AndIfuckingmeanit.”

Wewalkhandinhandthroughthecrowdofpeopleandspottheweddingpartyonthedancefloor

whoallbegintocheerandwhistleatthesightofus.JulsandJoeymovequicklyandpullusintothe

group.

“Fuckyes.Whohadthereception?”JoeyasksandBillyandIanbothraisetheirhands.Juls,Brooke

andTrentallstartclappingasReesepullsmeagainsthischestandkissesmyhair.

“Damnit,Dylan.Ireallythoughtyoutwowouldfixyourshitattherehearsal.Youjustlostmea

hundredbucks,”JulsscoffsasJoeyshakeshisheadather.ReesegrinswidelyatthelotofthemandIan

movesinandslapshimfirmlyontheback,issuingmeaquickwink.

“Iwaswayoff.Ipeggedyourrekindledromancetohappentomorrowafteryoutwowenthomeand

sulkedoveroneanotherallnight.Ohwell,atleastmybabywon.”Joeybeams,givingmeaquickkisson

thecheekandrollinghiseyesatReese.

“Thankfuck,Dylan.Thismanhasbeensomiserable.I’vebarelybeenabletostandhimaroundthe

office.He’sfiredthreereceptionistsinlessthanthreemonths.Noonewantstoworkforhim.”

ReeseglaresathimandIgasp.“Three?Why?Whathappenedtothatoneguy?Ilikedhim.”

“Heannoyedthehelloutofme,sofuckingcheeryallthetime.Thentheonegirldidn’tknowhowto

workthephonesproperlyandlastedabouttwentyminutesbeforeImadehercry.Andthelastoneused

yourshampoo.Shitdrovemecrazy.”IanburstsoutlaughingandwalksawayfromusasIflingmyarms

aroundmyboyfriend’sneck.Yup,that’sright.Myboyfriend.

“Awww.I’msorry,handsome.Idohopeyou’lllightenuponyourstaffnowthatyouhavemeback.

Iplanonmakingfrequentvisitstoyourofficeandwouldhatetoseeyougivingyourpoorreceptionistsa

hardtime.”Ikisshislipsquicklyashesmilesagainstme,hisarmswrappingtightlyaroundmywaist.

“Frequentofficevisits?Mmmm,Ican’twait,love.Anychancewecansubstitutefrequentfor

daily?”Hespinsmearoundasasongbeginstoplayandwepickupwhereweleftoffwithourslow

dance.

“Couldyouevenhandlemeonadailybasis?Iwouldinsistonmultipleorgasmsandgetrather

hostilewhenIdon’tgetmyway,”Iwhisperagainsthismouth,relishinginthecombinationofhisminty

flavorandme.

“Hostilewithadirtymouth?”

Iarchmybrowathimandnodslowly,hisgrinspreadingacrosshisface.

“Fuckyes.Ilovethatgirl.”

Hishandfirmlygripsmyassandpullsmeagainsthimaswemoveslowlybetweentheother

couples.Oureyesarelocked,bodiespressedtogetherandmyheadistuckedinmyfavoritespotinhis

neck.ThisiswhereIwanttobe,withthepersonIwanttobewithandnowthatIhavehim,there’snota

chanceinhellI’mlettinghimgo.AndI’dlovetoseeanyonetryandstopme.Seriously,Iknowexactly

whereJoeyhidmybutterknife.

Epilogue

“Cupcake,youhaveaspecialdelivery,”Joeysings,emerginginthedoorwaywiththefamiliar

whitebox.

Iwipetheflouroffmyhandsandsetmymeasuringcupontheworktop.“DoIneedtosignforit?”I

tryandlookpastJoeytospotFredinthemainshop,butJoey’smassiveframeblocksmyview.

“Nope.Isignedforit.Hereyougo.”Heplacesitontheworktopandstepsback.

Slidingitacrossthewood,Ipullthewhiteribbonandlifttheedges,openingthetopofthebox.

Hmm.I’mrewardedwiththesamewhitebox,onlyabitsmaller,withthesamewhiteribbon.“That’s

strange.”Ipulltheribbonandliftthetop,onlytorevealyetanotherwhitebox.Ichuckleandshakemy

head.Myboyfriendiscrazy.Goingthroughthemotionsoncemore,Iliftthetopofthesignificantly

smallerbox,andgasploudly.Sittinginthemiddleofthesmallerboxisabrowncard,butthat’snotwhat

makesmyheartflutter.What’smakingmypulseracefasterthaniteverhasisthetinyblackboxthat’s

peekingoutfromunderneathit.“OhmyGod.Joeylook.”IturnandifIwasn’talreadyhyperventilating,

I’mdefinitelylosingmyshitnow.StandingnexttomysobbingassistantisReese,deckedoutinadark

graysuit,andmakingitlookbetterthananymaneverycould.“Hi,”Imanagetochokeout,butit’sbarely

audible.

“Hi,love.Readyournote.”

Iforcemyfingerstomoveandpickupthebrowncard,openingitslowly.

Dylan,

Onehundredandthirty-twodays.That’showlongI’velovedyou.That’showlongI’vewantedto

protectyou,takecareofyou,andcherishyou.I’veknownforonehundredandthirty-twodaysthatyou

wereitforme,thatyouweremyforever.You’vecompletelycaptivatedme.Myheart,mysoul,myentire

being.Ican’timaginemylifewithoutyouinit,andaslongasIhaveyou,Idon’tneedanythingelse.Just

youandme.Forever.

Iloveeverysinglepartofyou,andIalwayswill.

X,Reese

“OhmyGod.”Icry,mytearsdroppingdownonthecard.Iglancetomyrightandhavetodropmy

gaze.Becausemygloriouslyhandsomeboyfriendisnowonhisknee,holdingthelittleblackboxthathe

deliveredtomehimself.Joeywailsbehindhim,naturally,andIreachupandwipeunderneathmyeyes.

“Whatareyoudoing?”I’mnotsureanyonewillmakeoutmywordsthroughmyshakysobfilledvoice,

butIsaythemanyway.

“I’mdoingwhatI’vewantedtodosinceyoufellintomylap.”Hesmilesthatkillersmile,theone

thatmeltsmeeverytimeIseeit,andopensthebox.Myjawhitsthefloor.I’veneverseenamore

beautifulring,andhechoseitjustforme.“Dylan,IneverknewIwantedthis,untilImetyou.Allofthe

lovethatIhaveinmehasbeenyoursanditalwayswillbe.”MyhandscovermynoseandmouthasI

staredownathim,thetearsrapidlyfallingontomyfingers.“You’vegivenmeeverything,love.Willyou

marryme?”

Idropdowntomykneesandthrowmyarmsaroundhim.“Yes.Yes.Yes.”Hewrapsmeup,pinning

metohisbodyandburieshisfaceintomyneck.“Yes.”Ilookup,seeingJoey,holdinghisphoneoutin

frontofhim,andcryinglikeababyaboveus.

“Mmm,Ican’twaittomakeyouMrs.Carroll,”Reesesaysagainstthesensitiveskinofmyneck.

“Here,letmeputthisonyou.”Ileanbackanddropbacktomyheels,holdingmytremblinglefthandin

frontofme.Hetakestheringoutandslidesitonmyfinger,pressinghislipstothetopofmyhand.“Do

youlikeit?”

“Areyoufuckingkiddingme?”Joeysquealsbehindhim.“Shelovesit.Iloveit.Goddamnit,

Billy.”

ReeseandIbothlaughasIstaredownatmyhand.“Idoloveit.It’sperfect,justlikeyou.”Ihold

hisfaceinmyhands,bringingourlipstogether.AndIdon’tletgo.

Acknowledgments

Thankyoutofamilyforbeingsoincrediblysupportive.TomyMomforreadingmydirtylittle

thoughtsandnotslappingmeacrosstheface.AndtoJessfornotlookingatmedifferentlyafteryouread

someofmysmut.Iknowitwashard.:)

TomyfavoritelittleX-Raybestie,Farin.IthinkyouwerejustasexcitedaboutReeseandDylan’s

storyasIwas.Thankyouforcarryingthepagesofmybookaroundandreadingitatredlights.Your

encouragementgotmehere.

ToR.J.Lewisforbeingtoobadassforwords.I’msogratefulforyouandyourcountlessemails.

You’vebeenthebiggestinspirationtome,andmyfilthysoulfounditsmatchinyours.

Lastandcertainlynotleast,thankyoutoeveryonewhoreadSweetAddiction.IhopeImadeyou

chuckleandgaveyouothertinglyfeelings.(YouknowwhatI’mgettingat.)IlovedwritingthisstoryandI

sincerelyhopeyouenjoyedit.

Ifyouhaveasecond,pleaseleavemeareviewonamazon.comorgoodreads.com.I’dLOVEto

hearfromyou,sofeelfreetoshootmeanemailanytime.([e-mail])

Thankyouagain,

Jessica

https://www.facebook.com/authorjessicadaniels