Bad  Boy  Sex  Secrets  

 

Day  Four  

Sensual  Domination  

 
Next,  Sensual  Domination.    As  I  said  to  you  before,  after  coaching  for  over  15  years,  the  number  one  reason  my  
female  coaching  clients  tell  me  that  they've  strayed  or  they've  had  affairs  or  they  flirt  with  the  tennis  pro  or  they  
lock  themselves  in  the  bathtub  reading  erotica  is  because  they  tell  me  their  good  men  are  uninspiring  lovers  and  
they  miss  their  bad  boy  lovers  from  the  past  who  rocked  their  world.  
 
Here's  something  that  you've  got  to  get  about  most  of  today's  women:  we  have  to  be  masculine  all  day;  doing,  
leading,  directing,  putting  out  fires,  creating  solutions,  acting,  getting  things  done.    Being  a  mom  is  actually  one  
of  the  most  masculine  acts  out  there.    I  know  it  sounds  feminine,  mother,  but  it's  all  do  do  do  all  day  long;  
believe  me.  
 
So  by  the  end  of  the  day,  by  the  time  you  see  her,  she's  most  likely  aching  to  be  feminine.    Oh  to  open  and  
surrender  and  receive;  to  be  led,  claimed,  taken;  and  to  be  out  of  control  in  the  safe  arms  of  a  man  she  trusts  and  
adores.  
 
Now  listen,  the  woman  you're  with  or  the  women  you're  dating  probably  choose  you  because  you're  a  good  
man.    No  woman  can  let  go  or  lose  control  or  open  to  an  asshole  so  this  is  a  good  part  of  you.    Don't  lose  it.  We  
just  want  to  bring  forth  this  other  side  of  you  in  combination  with  it  because  on  the  other  side  she  misses  
darkness,  unpredictability,  the  element  of  surprise  of  the  bad  boy  she  used  to  date.  
 
Many  times  these  women  have  had  the  best  sex  of  their  life  with  these  bad  boys  but  she  doesn't  want  the  other  
things  that  the  bad  boys  normally  do  which  is  betray  her  and  use  her.    Okay?    No.  She  wants  to  be  honored,  
adored,  and  respected  and  fucked.    Can  you  get  the  combination?  
 
This  is  what  you  can  do;  a  good  man;  now  that  we  wake  up  your  bad  boy  more.    Know  that  you  will  be  providing  
exactly  what  every  woman  always  yearns  for  in  bed;  that  combination.  
 
So  here's  another  bad  boy  sex  technique  for  you  that  I  call  Sensual  Domination.    It  really  works  for  a  woman  
who's  do  do  do  all  day  long  and  really  aches  for  you  to  claim  her.      
 
Assuming  you're  in  a  consensual  sexual  relationship,  I  want  you  to  tell  her  tonight  that  you  are  in  charge  and  
her  only  job  is  to  receive  pleasure.    Some  women  like  to  be  told  to  let  go.    Others  like  to  be  told  to  obey.    Others  
like  to  be  told  they're  a  bad  girl  and  they're  going  to  get  in  trouble.    Some  are  more  open  to  more  of  a  romantic  
beginning.      
 
You  know  your  woman  and  you  know  where  her  boundaries  are.    You  know  what  her  past  is.    So  your  intuition  
as  a  warrior  is  needed  here  as  much  as  a  strategy.    It's  mostly  who  you're  being.    Even  from  different  times  of  
the  month,  she  might  need  a  different  entry  way  in  to  this  sensual  domination.    
 
If  she's  spinning  and  she's  totally  in  her  masculine,  she's  not  going  to  just  go  from  0  to  60  so  you  might  need  to  
start  slower  with  some  music,  a  back  rub,  a  little  massage.    The  point  is  to  be  present  and  expand  her  to  her  
edge  so  she  surrenders  to  you.  
 
Make  it  as  delicious  as  you  can  for  her  senses.    If  you're  going  to  do  Sensual  Domination  tonight,  have  a  lot  of  
these  items  ready  ahead  of  time  so  you're  not  futzing  around  looking  for  them.    Things  like  luxurious  blindfolds,  
delicious  food,  velour  blankets  for  the  bed,  any  silk  scarves  you  might  tie  her  up  with,  candles  and  music  and  
lots  of  lubrication.  Be  prepared.  
 

Let's  start  at  the  beginning.  
 
As  you  say  tonight  is  your  night  to  receive  pleasure,  I  want  you  to  blindfold  her  with  a  luxurious  velvet  eye  patch  
or  a  silk  scarf.    Let  her  know  where  she's  going  to  be  first  so  she's  initially  feeling  a  little  safer.  But  you  might  
actually  move  her  to  different  areas  of  the  house,  as  the  evening  goes  on,  to  add  to  that  element  of  
unpredictability.    Her  invitation  to  surrender  and  trust  you  will  actually  open  her  wider.  
 
After  you  blindfold  her,  I  want  you  to  feed  her  something  absolutely  delectable;  maybe  a  chocolate  covered  cold  
strawberry  or  maybe  you've  even  warmed  up  some  chocolate  pudding  in  the  microwave;  not  too  hot  to  burn  
her  but  something  unexpectedly  warm,  as  well,  and  luxurious  on  her  tongue.    
 
Let  her  figure  out  what  it  is.    Maybe  drip  it  down  the  corner  of  her  mouth  or  get  her  to  eat  it  off  your  fingers.      
 
I  want  you  to  place  the  softest  velour  blanket  on  the  bed  and  then  before  you  press  her  down  against  it,  undress  
her  and  kiss  each  part  of  her  body  slowly  in  a  way  you  normally  don't  undress  her.    If  you  start  normally  with  
shirt,  start  with  pants.    If  you  start  normally  with  pants  or  a  skirt,  start  with  the  shirt.  
 
This  unpredictability  and  not  knowing  what's  coming  next  is  extraordinarily  hot  for  a  woman.    
 
I  want  you  to  also  avoid  the  erogenous  zones  in  the  beginning  to  build  up  more  tension.    Make  her  ache  for  you  
while  nibbling  her  neck,  her  belly,  her  inner  thigh.    Be  sure  to  talk  to  her.    She  can't  see  you  so  she's  going  to  
want  to  hear  your  voice  as  well  as  feel  you.  
 
Many  women  won't  let  go  all  the  way  until  they've  been  actually  restrained,  tied  up  and  dominated  by  a  man  
they  trust.    That's  why  so  many  women  were  so  turned  on,  I  believe,  by  Fifty  Shades  of  Gray.    We  are  so  
together,  in  control,  proving  things,  overcoming  things,  being  so  successful  that  this  idea  of  having  no  way  out  
and  being  tied  up  to  be  surrendered  and  let  go  to  our  lover  turns  on  so  many  of  today's  women;  not  tied  up  to  be  
hurt  but  tied  up  to  be  opened  to  bliss  by  a  man  we  love.  
 
I  recommend  using  something  so  soft  like  a  silk  scarf  or  a  necktie  before  you  get  in  to  more  soft  bondage  items  
like  cuffs  or  links.    You  want  to  talk  to  her  about  those  first  but  I  believe  that  silk  scarves  or  neckties  will  be  a  
wonderful  way  to  start.  
 
Also  question  and  be  sensitive  and  intuitive  of  how  much  she  wants  to  be  tied  up.    Sometimes  one  arm  will  do  it  
or  two  arms,  wrists  together,  over  her  head  will  do  it.    Sometimes  she  wants  one  foot  but  not  two  tied  up  and  
sometimes  all  four  of  her  limbs  will  send  her  over  the  edge.    Again,  be  willing  to  stop,  be  present,  be  close  with  
her,  keeping  one  hand  on  her,  your  voice  sensual  and  connected  so  she  doesn't  feel  abandoned.    Ask  her  if  she  
wants  one  more  of  her  limbs  tied  up  and  if  she  doesn't,  it's  not  personal,  just  go  with  it.    Go  with  this  woman  
who  is  willing  to  be  dominated  sensually  by  you.  
 
Now  something  you  want  to  know  about  her  and  learn  about  her  is  she  more  auditory?  Liking  to  be  spoken  to?  
Is  she  more  kinesthetic;  enjoying  your  touch?    Is  she  more  visual;  maybe  not  liking  the  blindfold  so  much  but  
loving  all  of  her  four  limbs  tied  up?    Or  what  kind  of  combination  thereof?    Explore.    See  what  turns  her  on.  
Listen  to  her  guidance  if  she's  willing,  I  hope,  to  tell  you  what  she  wants  more  of.  
 
Is  she  ticklish?  Prudish?  A  siren  ready  to  be  set  free?    Do  you  know?  
 
Ask  questions.  Be  impeccably  present  with  her;  her  breath,  her  movements,  her  moans.    Be  the  banks  of  the  
river  so  she  can  gush  with  unbridled  passion  as  the  river.    Really  explore,  does  this  turn  you  on?  Do  you  want  
more?  Less?  Stop.  Go  further.    Keep  praising  her  about  how  beautiful  she  is  and  how  erotic  she  is  and  how  sexy  
she  is.    
 
If  you  see  any  concerns  come  up,  praise  her  with  how  much  you  adore  her  and  you're  here  for  her  and  you're  
not  leaving  and  she  can  trust  you.  These  are  important  along  the  steps  of  dominating  a  woman.  It's  almost  like  

you'll  hit  a  wall  but  it's  a  soft  wall  and  if  you  stay  present  and  you  stay  connected  it  will  often  surrender  and  
soften  in  to  a  whole  new  realm  that  you  can  explore.    Don't  necessarily  shrink  back,  hide  or  stop  if  you  hit  a  wall.    
Quite  often  she  just  needs  to  process  and  breathe  and  let  the  energy  open,  make  sure  she  can  trust  you,  allow  
herself  to  give  her  permission  to  be  turned  on  by  this  domination,  seeing  that    you  honor  her  being  dominated  
like  this  and  then  she'll  soften  and  open  even  more.  
 
Now  I  recommend  you  have  a  lot  of  lubrication  ready  because  when  she's  all  tied  up,  she  can't  stick  her  finger  
down,  lick  it  and  get  a  little  more  wet.    It's  totally  up  to  you.    Let  me  tell  you  that  being  penetrated  by  your  finger  
or  a  sex  toy  or  your  tongue,  if  she's  not  a  little  bit  wet;  maybe  your  tongue  she'll  love  because  that's  already  wet;  
but  these  other  things,  if  you  penetrate  her  and  she's  not  wet  it  will  actually  hurt.    So  be  sure  she's  either  wet  
already  or  you  add  more  lubrication  so  she  feels  that  sense  of  freedom  and  so  she  can  ache  for  you  and  know  
she  can  welcome  your  touch;  whatever  it  is;  right  away.  
 
You  want  to  tease  her  in  a  way  so  she'll  ache  for  you  and  beg  you  to  penetrate  her.    Let  her  orgasm  as  many  
times  as  she  can  barely  stand.    Remember,  as  women  age  or  at  different  times  of  the  month,  we're  more  or  less  
juicy.    It  might  not  have  anything  to  do  with  whether  we're  turned  on  or  whether  you're  doing  the  right  thing.    It  
could  be  that  we  just  drank  too  much  wine  the  night  before,  didn't  drink  enough  water  or  are  going  through  
menopause.    Please,  you  amazing  man,  don't  take  that  personally.    If  as  you  start  to  touch  us,  your  women  are  
dry,  knowing  that  it  will  hurt  and  make  us  feel  bad  or  not  enough,  if  you  can  support  us  with  delicious  tasting,  
smelling  lubrication-­‐-­‐-­‐  oh  all  the  pressure  is  off  us  and  we  become  more  wild  and  more  free  and  electrified  to  try  
new  things  because  we're  calm  and  we're  open  and  we're  adored  and  we  can  let  go  and  we  don't  have  to  focus  
on  what  might  happen  that  will  be  bad.    We're  open  to  all  that  could  happen  that  will  be  delicious.  
 
And  you,  as  the  bad  boy  lover  taking  control  with  that  and  making  sure  we're  slippery  slick  wet  and  juicy,  oh  it  
just  makes  us  so  turned  on  by  you;  you  being  so  present,  so  sensual,  so  adoring  of  us,  so  kinky,  so  erotic,  so  
devouring  of  us;  really  discovering  you,  the  badass  Dark  with  Heart  part  of  you  while  giving  it  to  her  
simultaneously  while  her  receiving  it  simultaneously  giving  her  permission  to  be  her  bad  girl  self.  
 
Can  you  see  how  it  can  all  happen  simultaneously?  Each  of  you  being  it  while  giving  it  while  receiving  it.    OH!    
She's  been  aching  for  this;  just  the  way  you  speak  to  her  in  this  bad  boy  way;  touch  her;  gaze  deeply  in  to  her  
eyes  and  maybe  rip  off  that  blindfold  as  she  comes;  this  bad  boy  she's  been  waiting  for.    
 
You  can  do  this.